#can't believe they tried to redeem this man at the end

[nightwingandhissquad]

[danieyells]

Rui mizuki’s lines from Tokyo debunker if you haven’t yet PLEASE I will love you for all eternity

They’re edging me with the rui crumbs every chapter I can’t take it anymore

One flirty reaper coming right up!! And by right up i mean almost a week after you asked hhahaha

BUT YEAH WE DO GET A LITTLE OF HIM HERE AND THERE i wonder why he pops up so much. Especially for someone who allegedly tries not to be around other people much due to his deadly touch? Kinda sus--

also this is the first time i've posted all of someone's lines! not that i don't always end up posting 95% of them anyway, but for some reason some of Rui's were ordered weird(they're normally not entirely in order but they're usually sectioned properly, but for some reason one of his affinity chats was way in the wrong place) and I ended up closely paying attention to which one i was looking at and before i knew it i posted all of them lmao. . . .

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"{PC}, hey! Here's to another day vibing our way through curse twin life!"

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"Huh? Did you know you've got unread messages? Oh, that's why you've been leaving me on delivered! Ahaha!"

no that's just because my adhd makes me hyperfocus on things and it refuses to allow me to attempt to allot attention or energy to things it deems me not having enough attention span or energy or time for and i'm sorry--

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"Aw c'mon Ed, again? Why does he always leave his socks on the floor... It's actually exhausting picking up after him all the time..."

lazy sloppy vampire lol

"You look kind of tired {PC}, you doing okay? Why don't you stop by the bar later? I can be your shoulder to cry on."

"Hey! You on break now? If you're super nice and you're gonna come chill with me now, put your hands up!"

"{PC}...were you just checking me out? Hey, it's all good, don't be embarrassed!"

"Oof, Ed popped out of nowhere so I accidentally touched him and he died again. Now I have to carry him all the way back to the dorm..."

i love the face he makes when he says this lmao like he is so tired of Ed's carelessness!

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"{PC}! Did you come here to see me first thing? No way! You just made my day!"

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Aw c'mon, Ed, what are you doing sleeping out here? Didn't you just take a nap, old man? You're gonna catch a cold!"

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Oh hey, it's {PC}! Can't believe I ran into you here, so random! Guess we've gotta go on a date now, huh? It's like, written in the stars!"

i love flirty characters like rui lolol just. there's always More Going On there. and Rui starts off with More right off the bat.

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"I can touch the plants as long as I have gloves on! I mean yeah, I'm pretty sure the same goes for people, but don't you think it'd be scary to test it out?"

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Come swing by the bar later! I'd rather watch a pretty face like yours while I work instead of a bunch of drunk guys."

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"What? Ed was praising my good looks? I mean he's right, right? People always tell me my face is my only redeeming feature!"

but rui works so hard!? who's saying that!!

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Oh sorry, I don't do the whole class thing! You go, I'm all good here!"

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Ouch! Aw man, that rose thorn just scratched my arm... Wait, nooo! My rose bushes are wilting!!"

it's so easy for him to accidentally kill anything lmaoooo

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Are you out here by yourself, {PC}? Isn't that like not super dangerous? ...Wait, did that make sense? Whatever, let me walk you back!"

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Sorry! A drunk customer broke a glass, so I'm cleaning it up! Everyone's a little pent-up lately, I guess."

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"Watering plants in the AM is such a mood lift, right? Whoa, everything's blooming like crazy out here! Better get my pruning shears."

it's a testament to how well he takes care of these plants that they grow super well in permanently-night Obscuary, i think. 8'D

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Huh? Look, you've got loose threads on your uniform. Give it to me, I'll fix it for you!"

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Hey, {PC}, did you eat yet? My door's always open! You can just stay the night after!"

damn already inviting you to stay over at affinity 13--just don't share the bed, you'll wake up super dead

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"(yawn) Wow, I am dead tired... but I've gotta take a shower, make breakfast, and do the laundry before those two sleepyheads get up."

it takes a real man to be a single mother. . . .

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"Oh hey, what's your poison? Wait, I mean, morning! Man, I tried to take my friend's drink order when we were hanging out yesterday too, occupational hazard I guess."

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"A mission? I'm good, thanks though! Oh hey, you should invite Lyca! He'd totally be into that!"

Lyca also probably needs them to pass the grade lol

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"No way, look at the time! Wish I could keep listening to you talk... Wanna stay over?"

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Oh man, I'm sorry! I'm closing early, I've got plans with a friend tonight. It'd be awesome if you could come by tomorrow!"

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Congrats on making it through another day, {PC}! I seriously admire you for working so hard. You're not doing this all for me, are you?"

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"Morning! Whoa, you wanna help me with the housework, {PC}? It's all good, thanks though! The thought's more than enough for me."

c'mon, refusing help at affinity 20? let the pc be your little helper at least!

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Obscuary looks like it'd be full of downers, but it's actually pretty lively in there, right? Not gonna lie, I def prefer it that way."

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Lyca's an open book, but the flip side is he says the darndest things... I feel like watching him is bad for my heart..."

he talks so much about his teammates, he really is such a mom. . . .

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"My eyes are red? Huh, that's weird... Oh yeah, I was cutting onions just now when I was preparing the appetizers for the bar!"

. . .idk this is pretty high affinity. . .you were crying about something weren't you rui. . .or romeo paid you in weed and you were getting tweaked up in the back of the bar

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Oh, don't worry about me, I always sleep late! I'm down to chat till you drift off to dreamland."

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"Sometimes I wish I could've met you as a regular guy. I guess you wouldn't have given me the time of day if I had though, ahaha."

is it just me or. . .does it feel like he gets a little more distant as his affinity gets higher? like after affinity 17 it feels like he gets a little less flirty and a little more at arms length. . .like he knows his feelings are getting so strong that he might not be able to resist touching you, but he's too scared to do it even with the gloves on. . .so he tries to keep you a little further away. . .and then he admits it, he wishes he could be with you like a normal person, but if he were just some flirt in the street none of this would have ever happened. Poor Rui, he's cursed to be beloved but unable to give love how he wants in return.

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"Oh man, so nice... The weather's like perfect this time of year, right? Wish we could just chill like this forever."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Man, you wouldn't even know it was spring with how bleak it is in Obscuary! Aren't there any cuter anomalous plants out there?"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"I feel like Ed's getting more senile every day... Maybe I should confiscate his tablet."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"So, what do you think of my spring-inspired cocktail? Almost as cute as you, right? I'm gonna add it to the menu!"

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"C'mon! It's summer, how can the sun never rise in Obscuary!? I wanna get a tan!"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"It's not summer if you don't hit the beach! I used to go all the time back when I surfed. And then I'd pick up girls on my way home... Just kidding, I promise!"

why 'just kidding' lolol you're not together! this relationship is not monogamous even if you were!

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Ta-da! I've got sparklers! Fireworks are fun and all, but there's something special about holding a light that only sparkles for a hot moment."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"It's so hot out, I bet the bar's gonna be a ghost town... Guess I'll send Harurin and Romi a PR message!"

reaching out to the local population of alcoholic ghouls to remind them to give him business lol

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"There's so many dead leaves this time of year, it's a nightmare keeping on top of them! But you can use them to make a fire and roast stuff. Gotta look on the brights!"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Hey {PC}, when are you free? I have a date idea for us—a romantic walk to admire the fall leaves! I'll pack us a lunch!"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Oh damn! You look so cute all bundled up like that, {PC}! We've gotta take a selfie together!"

direct contrast to romeo who sees you in winterwear and calls you a fat slug kekw

(between 8pm and 5am)

"That piano anomaly makes the soundtrack for the bar! The song picks really tug at the heartstrings, right?"

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"You're a little late today, huh? If you can't get up in the cold, I could be your alarm!"

just gotta be really loud since he'd be too afraid to touch you awake, since he actually wants you to y'know wake up--

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Oh man, how is Lyca so full of energy when it's this cold? You should take him to Frostheim and see if he runs around in the snow like a puppy."

rui pointing at lyca: that dog is my son please take care of him

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Nothing like winter to make you miss the warmth of human touch... Oh, I'm good! Just getting to talk like this is all I need!"

BBY WE ARE ALL BUNDLED UP. YOU CAN HUG YOU'VE BOTH PROBABLY GOT ON AT LEAST TWO LAYERS JUST DON'T TOUCH FACES.

(between 8pm and 5am)

"Here, this Rui-original hot cocktail will warm you up! I'll blow on it for you, free of charge!"

is this the next step after gamer bathwater. host club host breath.

His birthday: (March 14th)

"Yeah, it's my birthday today! Oh damn, you're gonna celebrate it with me!? No way, I'm like, super touched right now!!"

Your birthday:

"{PC}... Happy birthday!! C'mon, birthday girl, sit down and chill out! This is your day, you should take it easy!"

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year! Want to start the year off on a high and come on a shrine date with me?"

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"Oh damn, are these for me? My heart! Is this your way of professing your love to me? Do I have a shot here?"

White Day: (March 13th)

"Ta-da! Happy White Day! This is for you! What's inside? You've gotta open it and find out!"

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"Guess what!? I finally broke my curse! Let's hold hands... just kidding! April Fools!"

this feels more like a joke on him than on you. . .a mean one at that lol

Halloween: (October 31st)

"Happy happy happy Halloween!! Trick or treat! Obviously I'm picking trick, ahaha!"

Christmas: (December 25th)

"Merry Christmas, {PC}! Oh man, I must be like, super blessed to get to spend it with you!"

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"Hey, hey, hey! We finally get to spend some time together, it's illegal to take your eyes off me!"

(13 affinity and above)

"{PC}? You seem kind of busy, guess I'll take this chance to get some work done…"

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"{PC}, you're back! I was worried you'd forgotten about me!!"

he's so flirty and clingy, but also he can't be clingy because he's scared you'll die if he touches you, even if he's wearing gloves. . .also surely your curse would cancel out his? Then again I'm sure a reaper i stronger than any other [living] anomaly out there. . . .

but. yeah. rui's a darling haha he just. he's another one of the 'i just wanna be a regular person, i wanna go back to normal' characters whose desire to just be a guy makes him special in a more fantastical world. i'm really looking forward to seeing the Obscuary chapter--probably like a month away, right? 'u'

[yanderes-galore]

If you're comfortable, could I request a romantic concept for Endeavor (MHA)?

I have mixed feelings about him because I know he's going to horrid to Darling... but at the same time he'd probably try to redeem himself later- This doesn't have much of a plot but it takes place after Rei. The original draft I was doing took place where you replace Rei but I scrapped it for now. Take this as an AU that doesn't really connect to canon.

Yandere! Enji Todoroki (Endeavor) Concept

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling (A section mentions female anatomy, however. This section is in pink), Obsession, Age gap, Possessive behavior, Manipulation, Abuse of power, Lucid yandere, Stalking, Marriage, Mentions of wanting/having children/baby trapping, Isolation, Dubious (forced) relationship.

In an alternate timeline where Enji decides to start anew from his old family, I can see him hesitate for once when he finds a new obsession.

After all, it's clear he's been horrible with relationships in the past.

He's only ruined his kids lives, same thing for his wife.

He probably doesn't even think he'll love again.

Then you come into his life, just about as annoying as Hawks, yet make him feel funny.

It's a familiar warmth... and he dreads it.

You're a new pro hero which means he's going to be dealing with you a lot.

This leaves him conflicted as now he'll have a harder time to suppress the burning warmth in him when he looks at you.

You're younger than him, at least half his age if not a bit older, he knows it would be unprofessional to do anything.

The good news, after his original family and the retirement of All-Might, he's much better than he was.

Unfortunately, if you ever got too close, old habits may make themselves known.

There's times you're so bratty... yet he knows it's just because you're young.

You're overconfident, yet you have a decently strong quirk.

Enji wants to be better, part of him even wants another chance at love, but doing it here would be poor choice.

You look up to him, something he both enjoys yet pities.

Which is why he'd probably stay quiet about his newest obsession for a long time.

He doesn't want to ruin your life.

You have promise, you don't need him to ruin everything.

At the same time... He worries he won't be able to hold back the longer you're around him.

To talk about Enji in general, he's a possessive yandere.

Even when he leaves his old family behind to make them happy, he'd still be bad with you.

Enji no doubt eventually would want to marry his obsession just to be able to show everyone you're his.

He knows marriage didn't go well for him before... but when he looks at you, he can't help but want others to know you're his.

That he's picked you.

To add onto that, if you have a womb... Enji would no doubt try to put a child in it.

I personally believe this man has a thing for strong successors.

Based on past behavior, that is.

So, if you were capable of having kids, Enji would eventually want that.

At first he'd be against it, knowing how his last four kids went, but the thought of giving you his kid...

It just makes him think it's another way to show you're his.

Even after losing his original family he's still possessive.

Old habits die hard, too bad you are on the receiving end.

Enji no doubt tries to be better.

He doesn't want a repeat of Rei.

He doesn't want to hurt this second chance, maybe he's just lonely but...

He wants to make you happy if you're involved with him, it's not like All-Might is in the picture anymore.

Enji may not even suggest a Quirk marriage in this case, perhaps this one he'll take his time with.

But your quirk is an added bonus as a fellow pro hero.

Enji tries his best to stay away and help you from afar.

He shouldn't have you, he doesn't deserve you, he can't ruin another...

Yet you grow close to him and he's trying to put a wildfire out.

I feel most pro heros would take a subtle manipulative approach towards their obsessions.

Things like coaxing their obsession into being involved with them.

Enji would try to stay away from it more due to past experiences.

But you just know he'll snap and start being closer with you.

It's no doubt an abuse of power due to his seniority.

Which is what makes it so manipulative.

You're both skilled heroes and you may even find dating the Endeavor flattering.

At first you think there's nothing wrong.

Completely unaware that being around Enji can get you burned.

Enji doesn't want to keep things hidden when he manages to date you.

He wants other heroes to know he's dating you.

That way no one else can sabotage him.

He wants people to know you for dating him.

When dating you he tries his best to be more amicable.

He doesn't try to hurt you, he's learned.

He's possessive and easily irritated when people bring you up... but never blames you.

He probably buys you what you want, even if you have the money as a hero.

He remembers certain aspects about you, even does it before you're dating.

Enji tries to hold himself back from marriage, but he may use it as another way to show you're his.

It's like a flex to him to say you're engaged. (even if you're not... but that's okay, he can change that.)

Plus, when he eventually gets you to marry him, it feels euphoric to slip on that ring.

He's admittedly nervous to ruin his second chance... which means he does his best to tend to you, even when he has work.

He wants to make things better.

If he notices you're falling out of love with him, or if you notice his more toxic behavior... he distracts you.

Others pity the relationship you two have, even if you are well cared for.

Most of his old family pity you, while Dabi finds it laughable Enji found someone else to torment.

Enji doesn't seem to care about the backlash.

As long as you love him, as long as he has that chance, as long as you're his...

Everyone else can burn.

Speaking of burns, early Enji may have used burns to mark his darling.

This time he refrains from that... but the thought is tempting.

Although... anything to show his mark on you couldn't be that bad, right?

He may not kidnap, but he'd definitely manipulate you into staying with him.

By the time the rose tinted glasses are off, you're in too deep.

If you can have children, you may even already be with child before you realize this... might've been a trap.

Enji likes to show ownership over his obsession.

While he may be caring with you, he's still controlling.

You're no longer your own person, perhaps even forced to give up being a hero.

You're his partner, you'll be known as his partner...

Enji doesn't plan on letting you leave, he'll use whatever means he deems necessary to keep you with him.

He'll lock you away, he'll bribe you, he'll baby trap you... anything.

Enji isn't going to mess this up again...

You're going to be his...

No matter what it takes.

[sad-leon]

Mmmmm angsty leo brainrot go brrr

Context:

Draxum took Leo during one of the fam's first adventures on the surface (8ish). He raised Leo as a warrior, training him with the portal sword. When he was 13, Leo felt confident enough to fight back and managed to get himself away from Draxum.

In his time with Draxum, Leo woundn't stop talking, complaining, joking, or pestering until Draxum snapped and nearly strangled him. He can still talk, but he chooses not to. He was trained (read:abused) constantly. He sustained plenty of leg injuries, leading to constant pain that braces barely help. On bad days, he can't walk at all. Most days, he uses his sword as a crutch.

The brothers meet April soon after Leo was taken. Donnie's the first to tell her about it as he's constantly looking for any signs of his twin. When they drop into the Hidden City, and end up in Draxum's lab, the Raph and Donnie go feral at the sight of the man that kidnapped their brother (they get even angrier when Draxum says Leo had run away. They don't believe him). April drags Mikey to the weapons room and grabs the weapons that seem to fit the others' fighting styles the best. April nabs the crystal in hopes it could help Donnie.

The brothers + April and Mayhem retreat when the lab is about to explode. They immediatly tell Splinter of Draxum's location. Splinter is too focused and the possibility of finding his baby blue, that he doesn't ridicule them too much for going down to the Hidden City.

Splinter and Donnie do as much research as possible to find out what Draxum could have done with Leo. It's only a day before the fam planned to go raid Draxum's destroyed lab when Donnie catches a suspicious figure portalling across the city, fighting off the mutants created by the Ooze-squitos. Donnie decides to go off on his own, having a gut feeling that the mystery person in important. Raph and Mikey follow close behind him.

For a year, Leo is out on his own. He stays away from the sewers, scared to face his family again. He hates he's become under Draxum (he does have innocent blood on his hands). He decides that until he can redeem himself, he'll stay hidden. When mutants start popping up in town, Leo is scared that Draxum had begun his plan to destroy the human race. Leo fights them and becomes sloppy at hiding himself.

He's nearly asleep in his hideout one night when he hears someone approach. He immediatly gets ready to fight until he freezes when he meets Donnie's eyes.

He panics and tries to portal away, but the panic disrupts his abilities and he ends up portaling directly into Raph and Mikey.

Do y'all want more of this au? I originally called it my villain Leo au, but I think Lonely Leo fits better..

[steeltwigz]

Ok I've been getting a lot more Taco II discourse on my timeline recently. NOW I see what you all mean.... I gotta be honest, a lot of the posts to me still read as fans making up things to be mad about fhdjf what do you MEAN "Taco is irredeemable and doesn't Want to be redeemed and forcing her down a traditional redemption arc is Impossible AND you're a misogynist for misinterpreting her character" OKAYYY. Sit down buddy, Cool IT. What in the WORLD are you talking about. Did you miss the last minute of the episode where she says "no more running" and decides to face her fears head on, with the support of MePad. Did you miss all those letters she sent to Pickle, or her reaching for the portal for "another chance" at season 1, so she could fix her mistakes and wouldn't have hurt her friend? "But she wanted to kill Balloon that one time!" ONE she wanted to taze him, relax. I mean like if he pops he pops, but that's pretty Par For The Course for an object show, ESPECIALLY when II2 was still developing its more serious, less hyper-violent slapstick tone. TWO part of her problem is that she doesn't change w the game, she's still running (at least partially) on season 1 rules and in season 1 killing people was pretty normal, sorryy. Like a HUUUUGE point of her narrative arc is how she's still making a lot of the same mistakes she made with Pickle, but she doesn't realize until it's too late bcuz she's still too focused on the game (until it all comes crashing down a second time and she hates herself about it, and tries to End The Whole Show (THROUGH NONVIOLENCE MIGHT I ADD)). The whole show, she's wanted nothing more than to be redeemed and to undo her mistakes becuz she REGRETS HURTING PEOPLE AND she doesn't fully believe she can or that she deserves to, until MePad begins to help her out. These two things can both be true!!

Also, come On man. Sooooo many characters in this show are "bad people" or can be mean or hurtful. (Honestly, Id argue that a huge theme of the show is realizing people are multi-faceted and that people aren't only their worst traits, or their stereotype personalities but are in fact just as complex and personable as anyone else. That the show and the game and the challenge bring out the worst in people for Drama or Views or Money, but that doesn't mean that's all there IS to the competitors, and even the hosts, and you can't judge them based solely on their worst traits, which are getting exacerbated and unnaturally worsened due to the harmful exploitative nature of reality TV). That doesn't make ANY of them "irredeemable". Taco can have a redemption arc just as much as MePhone or Knife or Nickel can, who IN MY OPINION have done similar, and also Way Worse Things than she did, that no one ever brings up in these conversations. And NO that doesn't make you a misogynist for misinterpreting Taco or for thinking Knife is fine and she isn't, it just makes you have poor plot comprehension skills and you're predisposed to hold bias against the antagonist character becuz she's the antagonist. It's Whatever.

[alicent-vi-britannia]

12 characters, 12 story arcs, 1 theme

A few days ago, I tried to synthesize in a single word the narrative arcs of the Code Geass characters (at least, the ones I know they have) with the intention of extracting the theme of each one. I will briefly explain my conclusions. Or, put another way, what each theme means for each character. I'll leave Lelouch for last because he's the main character and his theme is supposed to be that of the series. We go from bottom to top.

Self-fidelity / Milly: "the girl who learned to be in touch with her own desires and chose to be true to herself to bring out her best version." I think the phrase explains it perfectly. Milly found happiness and she became more mature once she decided to stop serving her family's wishes and focus on herself and what she wanted to be and do.

Confidence / Ohgi: "the man who learned to trust himself to become the leader his organization and his country needed." Ohgi's arc is inspiring, if you take off your toxic fandom glasses and take his journey seriously. It is true that he made certain mistakes, but he always thought of the welfare of his people and his comrades. That was his main motivation and what led him to overcome his personal insecurities. I was going to make a comparison, but you guys won't like it and you'll attack me.

Happiness / Euphemia: "the girl who dreamed of a world in which all people were happy." This is the only arc that was cut short and did not come to fruition for reasons that I don't need to detail. Euphemia was a selfless princess without a purpose until she met her brother again and wanted to restore happiness to him, Nunnally and the rest of the Japanese.

Truth / Nunnally: "the girl who had to discover the truth to grow up to become the empress who could rebuild a new Britannia." She is literally blind and cannot see the world as it is, but as it should be (hence her idealism). She also can't see through her brother's and her friend's lies, until her determination and her circumstances push her to do so. It doesn't seem strange to me that the breaking of the seal coincides with the moment in which she learns the truth and decides to face it.

Justice / Nina: "the girl who had to seek justice for the murder of her beloved and her own acts and thus be a better person." Nina's arc is a revenge arc. Obviously. But the anime gives it a negative treatment, as Nina only gets worse with each new chapter. It's not until she understands all the destruction that her revenge can cause (in a literal sense) that she stops and reconsiders. The Zero Requiem gives Nina the opportunity to redeem herself and give justice to her beloved since the culprit pays for her crime. It's at this point that she begins to heal.

Honor / Jeremiah: "the man who managed to win back his honor after offering his loyalty to his enemy." The entire arc of Jeremiah revolved around honor. He believed that he had failed his empress and his prince, made a fool of himself on a live broadcast, was demoted and fell to the bottom. From there, he only lived to seek revenge. But then again, it wasn't the way. He only redeemed himself by putting himself at the service of a lord worthy of his loyalty: his enemy.

Humanity / Rolo: "the murder weapon that regained humanity from him through love." Another phrase that explains itself. Rolo had been used and manipulated his entire life as a tool. But when he created good memories and a sincere bond with Lelouch, he started to make decisions, think and feel like a human being.

Forgiveness / Shirley: "the girl who learned to forgive thanks to love." We find another arc of revenge. Like Nina, Jeremiah, Suzaku, and Lelouch, Shirley lost someone important to her, was overcome with grief and rage, and was tempted by revenge until she discovered that the killer was the man she loved. In the end, her noble feelings prevail and her love gives her the strength she needs to forgive.

Freedom / Kallen: "the girl who embraced her freedom became a hero who fought to liberate her country and the world." This is going to sound strange, but I barely realized that Kallen is who she is because she is free due to a fanfic that featured an anti-Kallen who was in many ways trapped. Kallen is a free spirit and performs as an autonomous individual. She chooses the friends she wants (be it Britannian or Japanese), she loves the man she wants, she champions the cause she wants, she has the value system she wants. However, there can be no freedom without equality, and Kallen and her people live in a society that promotes inequality. The freedom of some (the Britannians) cannot coerce that of others (the Japanese and even half-blood like her). So Kallen works to change the world to a place where everyone has full freedom. That's her motivation to grow up and become the hero her people and the world need.

Love / CC: "the girl who only until she received love from others was able to love herself." CC's arc ties directly to Lelouch's because they both express a nihilistic philosophy. In short, CC wishes to end herself and the world (through the Ragnarök Connection) because she considers her immortal existence to be meaningless and thus unimportant. Worse still, an immortal life implies eternal pain. Something she can't live with. But she wants to be loved, because all human beings cannot live without love. It is in the nature of the human being to give and receive love. Therefore, love will always prevail in the darkest moments. So, when Lelouch offers his affection to CC, she becomes more human and renews her will to live (see how her arc connects to Rolo's arc). Let's say that she transitions from a negative nihilism to an agathonism (that philosophy that it proposes that you have to enjoy life and help to live a pleasant life).

Peace / Suzaku: "the boy who was able to find peace of mind by creating a peaceful world." Without going any further, the lever that moves Suzaku throughout the series is "guilt". Suzaku feels guilty that he killed his father, he feels guilty that the Japanese are oppressed by the Britannians, he feels guilty that he failed Euphemia in his duty as a knight, he feels guilty that he can't protect everyone… Guilt, guilt, guilt. What is the opposite of guilt? We may all think of different things, but I'm leaving for peace because Suzaku didn't make peace with himself until he got the punishment from him and when did that happen? When he made sure to create a new world with Lelouch with the Zero Requiem, in which all his loved ones could live. No wars, no racism, no terrorism, no hate. In peace.

Will / Lelouch: "the boy who twisted the will of others found the value of the will of the human being and began to dream of tomorrow." It's very ironic. Lelouch's Geass is described as the power capable of bending the wills of others to the mercy of his own. As he progresses on his journey and interacts with other characters, he realizes that human beings actively seek happiness and persist despite adversity. They doesn't give up when they falls, but gets up and continues to fight. That is what it is to be human. Arthur Schopenhauer, in fact, said that the will was the essence of the human being. But I think that the approach of Lelouch and Code Geass goes more for nihilism in its most positive aspect. The one who proposes the destruction of everything to establish new values that allow the übermensch to live in freedom. "Emperor Charles searched for the past, you search for the present. But I search for the future. […]. Because no matter how much time passes, people will continue to search for happiness. People who struggle with sadness, those who seek the future. How everyone keeps wishing for happiness. Human nature is the reason I chose Geass and wearing a mask." This is the key to human survival. This is the meaning of life and what this series wants to teach you.

If you start to examine each of the arcs, you will see that they are all connected in one way or another (after all, they are concepts that appeal to the human condition). And, if you reflect carefully, you'll realize that the arcs of our two main heroes (Lelouch and Suzaku) correlate with the extremist views of Charles and Schneizel respectively (this was something I was planning to address in a discussion on CG antagonistic figures).

I hope you have learned something or found something interesting in this post. If you liked it, don't forget to support me with a comment and/or a reaction. I would really appreciate it as that will help the algorithm.

PS: Don't ask me to come up with an exhaustive analysis of the philosophies raised in this series. Although it may not seem like it, I have a hard time handling philosophy (I don't mind going overboard like I did here).

[candyskiez]

fuck it. belos and grimwalker analysis time. before this starts, I wanna make this clear that this is a "belos is horrible bad terrifying" post. if you're looking for "belos is a sad pained man who deserved a redemption arc", you are REALLY in the wrong place. got it? great, good. let's get started.

I think, at the end of the day, the reason belos made the grimwalkers was to simulate connection. he wanted to fill the urge of someone taking care of him like caleb did when he was "good." he wanted someone with all the "good" traits caleb had, all the "right" parts of him, the perfect version of him he'd created that he believes evelyn "stole" from him. but making the grimwalkers like caleb wasn't the only reason.

he wanted someone to like him. who takes care of him, who feels bad for him. hes trying to simulate a close relationship he can't have with demons or witches since in his twisted world view, they're not people. they're horrible and sinful. so are grimwalkers, but they're slightly more bearable. he's essentially using them as a substitute for human connection as well as trying to 'save' caleb. to take care of him, to feel bad for him, to compliment him more personally, to spend time with. he was essentially trying to fill the void he himself created by being a piece of shit. he's trying to make someone that loves him "unconditionally." but his definition of unconditional isn't "I will never stop loving you." it's "I will believe you're always right." which is insanely unrealistic and insanely unhealthy. he essentially wants someone who spoon feeds him constant reassurance that yes you are perfect and do no wrong. he wants someone to constantly validate his horrific world views and tell him hes good , so he never has to stand still for too long and think about what he's done.

onto the "saving caleb" part.

his definition of saving caleb isn't saving him from danger. it's making him Perfect. it's making him hate witches, it's making him prioritize HIM above all else, it's making him not have a life outside him, it's essentially getting rid of all his flaws. whether it be actual flaws or things literally only belos considers flaws. his idea of perfection is unattainable. and also massively fucked up, but you already knew that. he wants a caleb that never fails, never disagrees with him, takes care of him, adores him, protects him, has no life outside of him, and will never ever leave. he never grew at all from the world view he was raised in, despite having centuries to do so. he separates the "good" parts of caleb and the "bad" parts of caleb into two completely different people. he tries to recreate "good" caleb. he has no care for the consequences or "caleb's" mental or physical well being. only if "caleb" is with him and agrees with him.

he has no care for the consequences of committing genocide against an entire world. only if it means that everything was worth it and caleb was wrong and philip was right. only if it means he's right. he's tunnel vision and a horrible bigot and so so in that deep end.

he didn't get redeemed because he chose to never ever admit he was wrong. he had no desire to admit he's wrong or to change. all he cared about, all he ever cared about, was two things.

1. being right.

2. his brother agreeing that he was right.

he doesn't care about anything else except for himself and the made up version he has of his older brother. he refuses to let his brother change, because that means considering if he has to.

belos is so horrifically fucked up and that's what makes him such an excellent character.

[americana-antihero]

Long post, but TLDR: Lois is allowed to be flawed.

Everyone and their mother is talking about how Lois responded to Clark's secret. It seems like many are on the side of Lois, believing she did nothing wrong. And then there are many who are on the side of Clark, believing he did nothing wrong.

Before I say what I believe, let me make this point: it seems that any time a female character does something wrong, fans immediately dislike the character from that point onward. And before anyone thinks I am referring only to male fans, nope! It's actually all of my female friends who grow immediately disgusted with the female character and refuse to redeem her.

And honestly, it's hard to blame them. Because often, when a female character does something that is morally wrong, it's not written as a character flaw that she will learn to work through. It's written as an Epic Girl Power Moment! Look at this Strong Indepedent Woman! She'll jump off a building to prove she's right - that's so cool and edgy and not a sign of emotional instability at all!

What Lois did came from a place of emotional instability, and that's not a bad thing. The writers need to lean into that to flesh her out as a character, and I think they will.

Someone else mentioned how Lois's issues with her father have led to this moment. Her father concealed everything from her, and growing up, Lois probably had to learn how to get the truth out of him, even if she had to use manipulation. It was kind of a survival skill. She can't stand not knowing something, and that's why she's at a job where she gets to learn EVERYTHING.

So now she's got this good friendship with Clark in which she has tried to be more open with him than their first story together. They have built trust. When Lois finds out that he is Superman, she gives him the chance to open up to her. Judging by her playful attitude, if Clark told her that he is Superman, Lois would have probably reacted positively.

And then things take a turn. Lois is so desparate for the truth that she handcuffs herself to Superman. And then he leaves her at the Daily Planet so she won't get hurt.

That's probably when Lois was at her most unstable. Because that whole time, she waited for him, wondering if he would get hurt. And when she saw the scratches on Clark, it probably reminded her of how she felt when she found out her mom was sicker than her dad would admit. That was the nail in the coffin for her.

By taking a step off that building, Lois is acting out of unresolved grief.

Yes, what Lois did was wrong. But that doesn't make her a bad character. It makes her a real one. By trying to defend her actions as "good," "right," "just," and "morally sound," it would do a disservice to where the writers are going with her character. Or at least, where I hope they go. I really hope this isn't a case of "Epic Girl Power Moment."

As for Clark, he did nothing wrong. People (albeit few) are trying to say he should have told Lois the truth...but he already tried. His fear about her publishing his secrets was valid, because that's what she said in Episode 1 - "We'll make him tell us his secrets - AND THEN WE'LL PUBLISH THEM!" Clark has no reason to believe that Lois wouldn't do that.

I also think Clark struggles to see what people actually think of him. Because maybe if he could see how much Lois cares about him, he wouldn't have been scared to tell her the truth about his identity. Instead, he believes that she "hates" Superman...which she never said she did, that I can remember. Clark just assumed that.

So I think maybe Clark had an experience growing up that made him think that everyone would hate or disrespect him. Probably something to do with why he couldn't play sports, or how his connection with Lana ended up. It's seen in how desperate he is to be a "normal man with a normal life." He's afraid that people won't accept him for who he is.

If Clark and Lois talk through it, it could be the most touching moment in Clois history.

[chaotic-fandom-writer]

Adam x Reader P.4 (Hazbin Hotel)

Sorry for the short part, life loves to get in the way. Promise the next one will be longer!

I also apologize for the delay on posting this, I had a bigger part almost completely written up, and a storm took out my wifi, and I lost all of my work. The part is so much shorter today because I wanted to hurry and quickly get something out for you guys this morning.

Part 5 will be out tonight so long as there's no more interruptions like that lol! And I promise it will be much longer, I have some good stuff planned!

Enjoy!

Warnings: Heavy cursing, violence, adult themes

Chapters I - II - III - IV - V - VI - VII

Adam

Adam tried his hardest to stay away. Really, he did, because he knew he would be putting you in harm's way by breaking Sera's rules. But it was hard.

Once he realized who you were back on that rooftop, all you've done is consume his mind. He missed you. He never thought he'd see you again. Now, the universe plops you down right in front of him, just to take you away again?

He couldn't stand it.

So, every night, he'd wear something unrecognizable, and go to your street.

If he stood in just the right spot, he could get a glimpse of you in your living room through the blinds.

Every night, he went, and every night, he saw the same thing.

You, curled up on the couch, in the dark. And he could hear you.

Crying.

It made Adam's stomach turn to hear you in so much pain. He never thought he could care about anybody like this ever again, but here you are, making him feel all these stupid fucking things.

He wanted to run right up to your door, kick it open, tell you everything about who you are, and hold you tight.

He wanted to kiss you, as much as he hated to admit it to himself. He wanted to feel your skin underneath his fingertips.

Damn her. He thought. Damn her for making me feel like this, and not even knowing it.

Adam really believed he could handle this as long as he got to see you from a distance sometimes. She's just some girl, he would tell himself. What are you getting so worked up for?

Until one day, he started to notice someone talking to you. A neighbor, it appeared. He would come knocking on your door every day with gifts - dinner, flowers, sweets - you name it.

Adam sat watching you one night, like he always did, and his greatest fear came true - he watched as you invited this man inside.

Nothing happened, thankfully, but his blood boiled at the sight of some guy trying to win you over.

Finally, he had enough.

One day, he waited outside for the neighbor to appear. And he did.

"Hey. HEY!"

The man turns, startled, relaxing slightly when he sees it's Adam. "Oh, hello Adam! Did you need something?"

"Yeah, I need to know why the fuck you keep visiting (Y/N)."

The man scratches the back of his head sheepishly. "Well.. we live next door to each other, and every day, all I can hear is her crying.

I don't think anyone should live like that, even if they were a sinner! And I figure, hey, she can't be bad if she redeemed herself, right? And she isn't she's actually a very sweet, beautiful-"

Adam cuts the man off with a punch to the wall, cracking the brick and making the man jump.

"Listen up fuckbag, I'm only gonna say this once.

That's my fucking wife you're hitting on, and if you go near her again, I'll make you regret it.

Stay the fuck away from her. She's mine."

Adam leaves the man in a pile of nerves and sweat, flying away from the scene.

I can't believe I just did that. I feel like a fucking simp.

--

You

Days had gone by since you'd seen him, or anyone else for that matter. You thought maybe you had made a new friend, your neighbor, but even he stopped coming to see you, too. You started trying to leave your room as little as possible. Every now and then, you'd notice Sera lingering at the end of the hall, but as soon as she saw you, she'd leave.

Truthfully, you could care less. You missed home. You missed your friends.

Tired of sitting around being Heaven's newest exibit to marvel at, you decided enough was enough.

I'm leaving this fucking place. No matter what I have to do. It's time to come up with a plan.

Packing one, small bag, you set it next to your door in case you needed a quick exit. Best to travel light.

The only problem was finding a portal back into Hell. You obviously couldn't just go ask someone to take you back. You considered doing something to get into trouble, but without knowing exactly how the angels would react, it would be too much of a risk.

You decided to break into Sera's office. It seems like a crazy, risky thing to do, but you figured if there's any kind of physical item that can help you, it had to be there, right?

You waited for the cover of night before sneaking to the office. The building was quiet at night, still, and silent.

You approached her door, straining your eyes for any possible sounds. After hearing nothing, you knock softly on the door.

No response.

You push the door slightly, and it creaks open. Peeking inside, you find an empty room. You enter, quietly shutting the door behind you.

You take your time searching the room, shuffling through papers and looking through cabinets.

Then finally, you see it.

Underneath Sera's desk is a gold-lined trap door. You reach for the handle and find it open. Inside is a small hiding space, occupied by some files, a wooden box, and a smaller box.

You reach for the big box, but when your fingers touch it, it suddenly sparks, shooting volts of pain through your arm.

You gasp, yanking your hand away. The box glues with strange carvings.

Taking a deep breath, you reach for the smaller box. This one doesn't hurt you, so you open it.

Inside, you find a glowing gem. The purplish-blue hues of light reflect off your irises, your eyes glowing at the sight.

You reach for it, and it allows you to do so.

Something about it speaks to you, telling you that it's purpose is what you're looking for. Unsure why, you feel certain that this is what you're looking for. You close everything up and quickly retreat back to your home.

Putting the gem in a safe, hidden spot, you quickly realize you have no idea how to activate it, and mentally curse your own luck.

Maybe I can convince someone to show me, or even trick them. You thought to yourself.

Either way, I'm getting out of here.

--

Don't forget, I'm always accepting requests!

Chapters I - II - III - IV - V - VI - VII

[adidegmez]

x-men '97 spoilers

ep 1(To Me, My X-Men)

wow. i just finished x-men animated series. last eps were different than the other seasons. im glad they made this Show story wasnt ober yet. this new start is so good. artstyle is amazing. The visual effects were so cool. everything is great. it was fun. cyclops is struggling. There's a lot of pressure on him. and he is leaving x-men with Jean. Jean is pregnant. Charles really left everything to magnus?! and why is bishop still there i get that timeline is not right but they are not doing a certain thing to fix it. and im glad morph is back. and rogue and gambit i love them. logan and morph's friendship is nice.

ep 2(Mutant Liberation Begins)

Why did they suddenly start calling Magnus Erik? Okay, Erik is also his name i know, but they used to call him Magnus. Erik is an honorable man. I want to believe and trust him. I hope he doesn't have any evil plans. We'll see what happened between rogue and magneto. storm lost her Powers while trying to save magneto. magneto tried. he really did. humans suck(most of the times-in most of the universes). they dont deserve them. dr. rogue and baby is here. scott is being nice to magneto. its good for now. but not for long probably. ororo left. gambit's heart is broken. and 2 jean's?! I cried in the last two minutes of the episode more than I ever cried in the first 5 seasons. It was more painful. it happened in a much more perfect way. it was beautiful. I guess this is what happens when an animated series is made for adults. i really love it.

ep 3(Fire Made Flesh)

Why is Roberto in the mansion? Is he there to hang out with jubilee or is he staying there now? Since when is jean a clone? goblit queen is so powerfull. baby is gone. Madelyne is one but i think we'll see her again someday. hi, forge. i hope this is really forge and he can help storm.

ep 4(Motendo/Lifedeath - Part 1)

I want to see more gambit and rogue. and I want to see nightcrawler. not mojo again🤦🏻‍♀. jubilee's powers are cool. storm:(. i hope she can get her Powers back. i love forge. he did something bad but he wants to redeem himself. i hope he can.

ep 5(Remember It)

this Show makes me so happy. kurt is here. genosha is beautiful. mutants live in peace. madelyn is here. and i got gambit rogue and kurt:). I can't feel nostalgic. I just finished the x-men animeted series yesterday but this is so perfect. its just perfection. i love them so much. this Show pays tribute to what the other has done and takes it even further. I can only ask for more episodes, there is nothing else I can ask for(except maybe more gambit and rogue). scott is right. If the x-men were like humans, I think they would start thinking like the old Magneto. The x-men did not think about themselves, they always prioritized others. but in the end they were always hated. I don't understand how they can still do this. How do they hold on, how do they compromise themselves for those who still hate them? Mutants(not the bad ones) deserve great things, but all they get from the world they're trying to save is hatred. and scott is losing his fate in charles vision. he lost his son. his wife was a clone. There's a lot going on for Scott right now. but I hope he can get over this as soon as possible. jean kissed logan! she is confused to she has to remember so that she can be with scott again. and then maybe jean and scott could help eachother get better. i like seeing scott's eyes. scott is right i am not sure jean loves scott anymore. she remembers she loved him but i dont think she feel that way anymore. scott loves madelyn because she was jean and part of her is still jean. idk everything is complicated. it is painful to watch. i just want them all of them to be happy. but there's so much going on right now. I wanted gambit and rogue to be together. They were so beautiful together. But Magneto may be right, I can't be angry with him. But I just wish Rogue and Gambit could be more than friends. too many people are heartbroken rogue, gambit, jean, scott, (me). Did I just see Watcher? after gambit and rogue's talk. i think i did. i wish things were simple. cable is nathan. Why was he there and why did he leave? erik is gone. gambit is dead. they saved rogue. so many mutant died. leech trusted magneto. magneto gave hope to mutants and everything was great, i had hope things were getting better. mutants on genosha were happy. magneto he tried. he tried to save them. he tried to be like Charles. but World just wont let them be this good. he really tried. Would I be too delusional if I hoped that Remy and Erik would return? I need them both back. i cant feel you, this tells everything(reminds me of wanda). I knew it the moment I saw rogue touching gambit. I wish things could have happened differently. i knew I haven't cried this much while reading or watching a story in a long time. This episode really broke me. I'm not in a good mood. The world doesn't deserve X-Men. they never deserved the x-men and will never deserve them. Whatever the x-men do now, they will almost always be right.

ep 6(Lifedeath - Part 2)

lilandra and Charles are good together im happy for them. but i wouldnt mind if they come to earth and save x-men. storm and forge they are cute. but it probably wont last long, i wish it could last. i hope Charles can learn about what erik did. professor xavier, that was smart. yes, storm got her Powers back. Charles is Charles. i love him. his ideals are amazing but they are just ideas. to make them real they suffer they try and they fail over and over again. im glad hes returning to earth but it is too late. and things in spece wont be good when he left. and sinister! sinister killed all those mutants adn remy and erik. i hope he will have a painfull and an awful ending to his story.

ep 7(Bright Eyes)

not a funeral, please he has to come back. hi cap. normally i would say it is nice to see you but right now you're just reminding me how ridiculous mutant hatred is. Yes, there are people who hate superheroes too, but mutant hatred is on another level. And this is ridiculous. rogue is right to be mad. Humans expect mutants to compromise themselves in order to live with them, and they require this. Because humans are afraid of mutants, mutants have to hide their powers and not use them so that people do not feel threatened. Why do mutants follow their rules? because they are good. The "bad ones" don't suppress their power just because people want them to. But when it comes to humans, mutants who live their own nature as they wish are evil. i love kurt and rogues relationship. it feels good to see the X-Men being together and helping each other through all this bad stuff. oppenheimer… now i am become death the destroyers of worlds. trask destroyed all those mutants lifes. i cant say he didnt deserved death but rogue, she let him die. this is not who x-men is, at least WHO they were. she is angry she is grieving she is not in her right mind right now. if she was herself she wouldnt have let him die. i saw the sign for Strak Industries. I wish we could see Tony. In which universe, in which timeline are we right now? Is Tony dead here too? magneto is alive. bastion? i dont know anything about him i guess ill see. scott learned about cable.

ep 8(Tolerance Is Extinction - Part 1)

is madelyne dead? i thought she just get hurt not dead. kurt with swords, I've been waiting for this. Everything is in a very bad state right now, but this visuality and the fights are beautiful. Jean being a mother to cable(seatbelt:) ). wolverine's fight in the skys. yes! summers family. it was so cool. hi peter. but really magneto was right. Charles was just being naive. humans are the wortst. i wish humans and mutants could live together in peace but humans wont let them. mutants deserve better. Charles is back. It wasn't Magneto who started the war. humans wanted this war from the beginning. Mutants and X-Men have been patient, but now it's too much, how much longer should they be patient? It would be really nice if there was peace, but as long as people have this hatred, it seems impossible to make peace. Bastion ignited the war, but whether he started or not, the war would still happen one day. I hope the mutants can win. magneto can win. I think Charles is late. Before the war, they could have tried to implement Charles' ideals, but it was too late. The war has begun and mutants need a leader in the war and that leader must be Magneto.

ep 9(Tolerance Is Extinction - Part 2)

Why is everyone mad at Magneto? I understand humans being angry, it's usual hatred, but why are the x-men so angry? Okay, the order of the world has been disrupted, life has become difficult, the end of the world may even be near, but Magneto saved the mutants. If he had not done this, the mutants would probably have died. I've never been one for villains, I've rarely agreed with them. and this is one of those rare moments. magneto is right. I don't think he is the villain in this story bastion and humans are the bad guys. im glad rogue went with him. charles' ideals are nice to think but its impossible right now. we need magneto. black lether, I completely forgot this scene was coming. x-men are noble they are still trying to do the right thing(according to them). I'm still amazed at how they can endure so much and still try to do good. morph smash:) I wish mutants didn't fight each other. but really i wanted to say shut up to Charles when magneto did. things are bad, really bad. When I started watching '97', I thought I would watch something fun and light. I never thought it would be this dark. Logan should have at least thought once before attacking Magneto with his metal skeleton. He probably won't die, but I think this is an indication that Magneto didn't want to hurt them before. If he wanted to, he would have done this years ago, but he prioritized mutants and didn't want to harm mutants. Now he had to harm the X-Men to save many other mutants. scott confused me, yes the others needed time but why did this happen? Is Jean dead? forge and storm will surive too right?

ep 10(Tolerance Is Extinction - Part 3)

ironman! I wasn't surprised when I saw Ironman with Captain America, but Daredevil caught me off guard. Daredevil is one of my favorite Marvel characters. Is Doctor Strange in surgery?! wakanda! cloak and dagger! this cameos are amazing i hope we can see things like that in live action. I hope mister sinister is gone for good. t'chaka is black panther. Charles destroyed magnus. i hope he can bring him back. bastion is right, humanity would rather die than have kids like mutants. and that why i dont like them. mr. fantastic(morph but still its nice to see him)! humans say we did it. But all they do is bring about the end of the world over and over again. x-men saved the world, magneto saved, mutants saved the world. humans only made it a worse place. wanda and quicksilver off World? where are they? bishop. yes save the x-men. i need season 2 immediatly. x-men scattered through time. They found Nathan. en sabah nur(Apocalypse!!!). At least the series didn't end in a bad place. They defeated Bastion and Sinister. They fell apart, but they're not in a bad situation right now. When is gambit coming back? he has to come back.

this Show is amazing. Characters from MCU and X-Men are in the same universe together. It was very beautiful. I hope we can see more. I can watch so many seasons this way.

[vani-is-typing]

so i lowkey gave up on the agggtm adaptation after finishing episode 3 of the series. i was at the very middle of the show, and so disappointed by all the unnecessary changes they'd made from the books, and the snowball pacing was doing nothing to engage me whatsoever, in fact it was one more reason that i turned away from it. the only thing redeeming i think i found was the dynamics of pip's friend group. it was fun whenever they were all on screen together.

i heard someone online talk about pip and ravi's chemistry together being another redeeming point, and i thought about adding that as well, but looking back it was only okay, nothing out of the world. the fact that they were spending a lot of time alone together probably helped this person believe that their chemistry was excellent, when it was only fine. the actors tried their best, of course, but they are also very young and i personally think they were having a hard time conveying the kind of under the surface tension i would've loved to see.

lastly, i also heard someone online say that stanley forbes just never showed up. that was probably the most crushing thing i heard in the time after episode 3 and about to go on to episode 4, eventually stopping me from continuing because stanley is my man yo. you can't do me like this. you can't literally handpick one of the most memorable and important characters from the books and just kick them to them to the curb. even if stanley does end up hopefully inevitably in season 2, which i don't know yet if there will be one, it seems very sucky to me that he wasn't there at all this season, when the show is just taking off.

now although i have more to say from the first three episodes i saw of a good girl's guide to murder, i will refrain from doing that because incorporating all those things into this post will take a lot of time and make it so much longer. also, i'm waiting on the premiere of the umbrella academy season 4, if that wasn't already crystal clear enough from my last post, and will be pouncing on it the moment it's available, so i can't scar this beautiful waiting time by writing down and explaining the flaws of a show i didn't like, in length.

that'll be all. i do think i will complete watching a good girl's guide to murder someday, most probably if there's a season two later on, because then i'll need to know the show's altered version of what happened before. if there never comes a season 2 after all, then it's really in the hands of fate if i finish agggtm or not.

i will probably end up doing it though, like five years down the line. i can't handle unfinished shows, or anything else. see y'all.

[mdhwrites]

Andrias vs. Collector: Who Was Redeemed Better?

Andrias hands down. Not only is it helped IMMENSELY by character consistency with him but it actually functions with what we know of him. Despite literally only ever getting half an episode dedicated to him (he doesn't actually get a lot more screentime than The Collector, especially while as a villain) we understand his motivations, the reasons for his cruelty, why Marcy made him cold and annoyed every time she was even mentioned post True Colors (he did not enjoy torturing Marcy. The literal only claim there is one line from True Colors where he blames her but otherwise, Marcy is fridged SPECIFICALLY to give someone for Andrias to show regret about) and then when shown how far he had fallen from the good man he was, he goes ahead and tries to fix that. First a final act of heroism but then not asking for forgiveness or the like. He is too guilty to need, or perhaps even want, such things and he instead can try to put things right on his own. In the end, we are left with the impression that Andrias WILL continue to tend to Amphibia now until the day he finally dies. It's actually done pretty well for the fact that it's given such little direct attention, especially by the time he's supposed to start being redeemed.

Meanwhile, the Collector's arc only works if you ignore large swaths of the show. His redemption mostly comes down to the idea that he needs to learn morality and that other people can be hurt by his actions but... He already did. In Watching and Dreaming, he yells at Belos controlled Raine specifically about how King will hate him for the nightmares, showing that he understands that his actions can upset people. In S2B, he talked about wanting to play with bones and criticized Belos for potentially murdering the Grimmwalkers, kind of opening up a moral conversation about the nature of Belos' treatment of them while showing his knowledge of death.

Even if we believe he didn't know these things and try to say he was manipulated, we can't. Belos' goal was extremely explicit and back when he was Philip, he had no reason to lie to the Collector. A spell to kill all witches in return for your freedom was the deal. That's pretty damn evil and the Collector could have always said no but instead he's EXCITED for them to be dead in Hollow Mind. All that matters to him then is his freedom, screw anyone else. Then when he is freed, he has neither the archivists or Belos to push him around and tell him what to do. As such: Why the fuck did he make the hunting stars? You know, the roaming stars that turn people automatically into puppets, rendering them to a fate worse than death as they are conscious and aware of what's going on, even as they are entirely incapable of doing anything about it. They are still around MONTHS later. Hexside literally keeps watch for them. If he is just a little guy, why the fuck did he make those in the first place and why are they still around?

None of this is ever addressed though. Instead, the show spends a quarter of its finale, and a decent chunk of the special before it, focusing on trying to redeem him and show him off as a good guy while not having him actually acknowledge the awful, terrible things he did. There's no taking of responsibility like with Andrias. There is no proper refusal of his morality or change in his thinking. Even his attempt to make peace with Belos is flawed because it's still the same all or nothing thinking that we've seen up until now for the Collector. "I do X, I get friend." It's not actually an acknowledgement that other people are complex and have their own free will, it's just a new form of trying to easily get what he wants. Then after her turns people back, which is good, he just leaves. He doesn't do anything to actually make up for what he did or allow him to face a world that he has irrevocably damaged. Instead, he abandons it all. All that responsibility and guilt can just be left behind instead of actually worked on. How is that a show of what he learned? Of him rejecting how he was before? Of him being REDEEMED?

It makes it much less an arc and more something we're told. At least when Andrias powers down to make Anne's final punch on him more effective, we have seen his regret. We have seen his motivations. We have seen as one is pushed into his face and the other torn down. Then we get to see him act on it, allow his conquest to fail, as a willful decision to back down from that evil rather than double down. Then we see follow through with him in the timeskip where he is still simply trying to make up for his sins, even if no one will ever tell him his work is done.

We don't get anything like that with the Collector and that's why he will always be easily worse to me.

======+++++======

Someone shared a Reddit post on this topic in my Discord and I almost posted 95% of this as a comment there. I... I know better than to do that on Reddit though so I decided to just let it be a blog over here.

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[whereisten]

Late Night Adventures with a Green-Haired Kingpin

*Happy Ending*

Part 1 | Part 2 Intro | Part 2 | Part 3 Intro | Part 3 | Part 4 Intro | Part 4: Yuta Oneshot! | Part 4 | Part 5 Finale (Happy Ending) | Part 5 Finale (Sad Ending) | Part 5 Finale (Wildcard Ending)

Summary: You couldn’t quite explain how you, a normal office worker that didn’t even have a traffic violation, ended up in a gang leader’s bed, but here you are.

Genre: angst, fluff, smut, mafia

Pairing: Gang Leader!Taeyong X female reader (who is also a gang leader now)

Warning: violence, graphic descriptions of death and murder, cursing, cheating, toxic relationship, gun and knife mention, possessiveness, manipulation and blackmail, alcohol and cigarette use, character death, smut (unprotected (be safe!), rough sex, impregnation k!nk)

Word Count: 12.2K

(a/n: wow wow wowww we have finally reached the end of this series, I can't believe it, I'm actually kinda sad to say goodbye. Greenie, I will miss you :( anyway! I hope you enjoy the finale, both endings start off the same for about 1k words, then veer off to two completely different scenarios, so I hope you'll consider reading both. let me know what you think about them! I had fun writing both! its been some time so my writing style has changed, hope thats okay. Thank you for your support <3)

“Do you think not eating will make me pity you?” Jaehyun stares at you sitting across the table from him sternly. 

You look down at your now unbound wrists in your lap then up to the guards standing in all four corners of his dining room. You couldn’t escape if you tried. 

“What’s your plan here? What’s your goal? You’ve already killed Yuta…I’m willing to give you everything we owned..and yet..you don’t want it.”

You sniffle as you think of your last moments with Yuta. As frustrating as he was, you didn’t want him to die. You never wanted him to feel pain. He was just a young, insecure guy whose downfalls could’ve been redeemed if given the chance. And in just under a minute, all that was taken from him.

You sit there, stitched up and still in pain as tears fall onto your hands.

Jaehyun carefully cuts the fat from his steak. “Oh..you misunderstand me..I do want everything, and I will take it when I please..but I also want Taeyong to pay for his, and his father’s, wrongdoings. You also must pay for your wrongdoings. You chose to protect your men, I chose to avenge my sister. With each choice comes a consequence, wouldn’t you agree?”

You don’t nod, you only cry harder. A slight feeling of shame hits you and you think of how Yuta would scold the shit out of you for showing weakness if he were alive to see it.

“Hmm?” Jaehyun places a finger on your chin and tilts it upward. You were too lost in your tears to notice he had walked over to you while carrying a piece of steak on a fork.

The annoyingly handsome man smiles slowly while tilting his head. “I have no doubt that Taeyong will find the whereabouts of your men and bring an end to this chapter, I always get what I want.”

You chuckle and brush his hand away. “You’re a fool, he knows I’d never forgive him for revealing that.”

You wince as a sharp pain cuts deep into you again, reminding you of the accident that occurred just hours prior.

“Me? A fool? Hmm and yet you’re in this situation with no Superman to save you..your other hero lay dead, headless, and covered in bugs as the first stage of decomposition starts and-“

“Fuck you! Don’t talk about him like that! You think you’re better than him, but the truth is your daddy gave you everything! You’re nothing but a spoiled brat struggling to fit into his big man pants for the day!” You stare into his eyes and curse him through gritted teeth. Before you can take another breath, he grabs your chin and tightens his grip, then stabs your wound with the opposite end of the fork.

You scream at the sudden pain while trying to escape his hold, but you can’t get away from him. He laughs as you squirm in pain.

“And are you so different? Fucking a kingpin on the first night of meeting him? Learning all there is to know about this business just so you can fuck another man and become work buddies?” 

Your eyes widen as your eyes slowly drift up to his.

Jaehyun pouts. “Oh..you didn’t know that I know you’re a whore, a smart whore, but a whore nonetheless. You spread your legs for Taeyong and it got him all googly-eyed and stupid, so stupid he gave you everything. Fuck, pussy must’ve been that good.” 

He laughs as he shoves the utensil in deeper. You groan. “Stop!”

“Inheritance is inheritance, who cares how it’s gained..isn’t that right, honey?” The wild look in his eyes reassured you that he was having fun with this.

“Fuck you! You know nothing about me! You’re lucky your dad worked his ass off so you don’t have to lift a finger, you fucking asshole!”

“You know so much, honey. You’ve also got a dirty mouth. Be careful or I might start to like you.”

Your nose flares as you breathe heavily.

He uses his hand on your chin to pull you upwards into a standing position. You try to fight him off, but he overpowers you easily. Something about him makes his strength feel unlike anything you’ve ever felt before.

He releases his grip and moves to stand behind you. He then holds the piece of steak up to your face. “Now, eat.”

You turn your head away, letting out a huff. Jaehyun pushes two fingers into your wound, making you scream again and bend over. “Stop! Please!” You grip the edge of the table, still trying to fight him off.

He only chuckles and pushes his fingers in deeper. “Just open your mouth and I’ll stop, it’s pretty easy.”

You cry harder, but do as he says, opening your mouth as he places the fork inside. 

“There you go, good girl.” He smiles again as you chew.

He lets you go and walks back to his seat at the table, leaving you a crying mess. It takes you some time and strength to sit back in your seat, your hand over your wound as blood begins to pour out. 

“You and your men are starting to piss me off, but as I said before I always get what I want.” He cuts into the steak slowly, the fork and knife held by his fingers still covered in your blood.

You feel weak, his face becomes a blur and you pass out within seconds.

[5 Hours Later]

With only a few hours left, Taeyong arrives at Jaehyun’s mansion. He sits on the couch and waits for Jaehyun to show up.

He hadn’t slept all night, he’d been working with Taeil to figure out where your men were. He immediately knew he was going to find them and give their location away to save you. As he said before, he didn’t give two shits about them and didn’t care if that offended or upset you. Yuta was killed and he needed to save you before it was too late. He lost his best friend, he couldn’t lose his true love too. Furthermore, you could help him find Haeju.

Jaehyun arrives after about 5 minutes, walking towards the love seat facing him. You walk in after him. Taeyong’s eyes follow the leash connecting Jaehyun’s clenched fist to the collar around your neck and nearly loses it. Taeyong is saddened to see you like this, your shirt stained with blood, your eyes low and red from crying, and your face drained. To make matters worse, the collar has chrome letters decorating it to spell out ‘JAEHYUN’S’.

He truly was a petty and sick man.

“Kneel.” Jaehyun commands while pointing to the spot beside his feet on the floor.

Taeyong’s eyes grow. How dare he, he’s out of his mind. His heart starts to race as he grows angry. “N-“

“It’s okay, Taeyong..I’m okay.” You kneel quickly, ignoring the fact that Jaehyun was hell-bent on breaking you down and putting you below him. He was exactly as you told him, a spoiled brat.

“Good girl.” He smirks as if hearing your thoughts.

Taeyong grits his teeth when he sees you clutching your stomach and wincing.

“She needs to rest.” He says to Jaehyun sternly.

“Oh god, I hope that’s not what you came here to tell me.” Jaehyun rolls his eyes, leaning back and taking in Taeyong’s irritated appearance. He knows he’s practically two seconds away from lunging at him, and he loves it. 

“Taeyong..you don’t have time.” You whisper through a strained breath. Kneeling in that position puts more pressure on your wound.

Taeyong swallows hard. “Fine..here..the coordinates of where their men, along with my own will be meeting. I faked a message from Yuta’s number calling for an emergency meeting at 12.”

Your eyes grow, you shake your head. “No! What are you-“

He continues. “It’s a warehouse, so there will be approximately 5 exits your men will have to cover. Do what you will, they mean nothing to me now, let y/n go so I can save my sister.”

“Taeyong, don’t do this.” You start to cry once you see the paper Taeyong places on the center table.

“Oh? It’s that easy, is it?” Jaehyun crosses a leg over the other, his dimples showing through as he grins.

Jaehyun’s right hand man grabs the paper and leaves the room to make preparations for an attack.

“I gave you what you asked for, now let her go.” Taeyong doesn’t look at you, for the sight will drive him mad if this takes any longer.

Jaehyun nods. “Sure. Go on.”

And it’s a little too easy. No catch? No pause? Just freedom? Oh no..you both knew Jaehyun better.

You start to crawl towards Taeyong, and once you’re within an arm's reach away, Jaehyun tugs the leash hard and snatches you by the collar back towards him. You yelp and grab at the collar once it tightens.

“But..I didn’t get what I asked for, did I?”

Taeyong stands up. “Stop with the fucking games! Let her go!”

You cough and gasp for air.

Jaehyun shakes his head while laughing. “I think she can stay beside me for a few more minutes..at least until my guys confirm yours are dead. It’s only fair. Or…you could stay here and let your sister die.”

Taeyong sighs and sits back down.

After a few seconds, he says through gritted teeth. “You’re an asshole.”

Jaehyun nods. “Yes..well, it’s just another day.”

“Just…five minutes..give me five minutes then.” Taeyong looks into his eyes, trying to hide his embarrassing tone of desperation.

Jaehyun scoffs then eyes him up and down. “You don’t need five minutes, you probably finish in two..”

“You broke your own rule and lied..the least you can do is give us that…I don’t even know if I’ll see him again.” You growl at him.

Jaehyun looks down at you. “Ahh..and the bitch makes another demand.”

Taeyong's eyes narrow, he never thought he'd feel such a burning urge to kill anyone as strong as this.

“Two minutes and bring my toy back unharmed.” Jaehyun lets the leash go.

Taeyong quickly kneels to the ground with you and holds you in his arms closely. He helps you up to your feet then quickly walks you outside.

“Listen, we don’t have much time but trust me, okay?”

You sniffle and shake your head. “Taeyong, you bastard, I’ll never forgive you for this.”

He holds both of your arms and holds you firm towards him, his eyes growing as his grip tightens. “Y/n, just trust me!” 

You nod, but don’t look into his eyes.

“I’m..sorry I couldn’t save you, but I know he won’t kill you, he needs to have something over me and as of right now, he knows it’s you..it’s you above everything..look at me.” He uses his finger to bring your chin up towards him. 

Your teary eyes finally meet his, melting him where he stands. Had his mind not been in a million places at once, he would’ve kissed you until the sun set. “I love you.”

“That’s not enough, Taeyong..what are you going to do?”

“First, I’m going to save Haeju, then I’ll come back for you, just wait for me, I promise..”

You nod. For a moment, you had forgotten that Haeju was running out of time. “She’s probably at the pit, it’s a house in the middle of nowhere..here take this.” You hurriedly hand him your smart watch. While getting stitched up, you remembered that it was connected to a tracker you left inside a vase at the house. The watch could pinpoint where it was once the app was activated.

“Follow it quickly, it’s just a guess, but I doubt Yuta would leave her in a place that I don’t know of.” 

Taeyong nods. “Thank you, do whatever he says, give him whatever he asks for..just until I get back, okay?”

You nod. “Please…be careful.”

He can’t hold back any longer. He leans down and kisses you deeply, drawing you in as your eyes shut. Your heart starts to race and tears flow down your cheeks as you think this will be the last time, if not for a while, then for forever.

Taeyong feels himself tearing up as well. He remembers all the moments you spent together and the times you made him happy. He remembers when you lived together like a normal couple and how your smile brightened every day for him. Losing Yuta was too much for him to bear, he knew he couldn’t lose you too.

You finally pull away and press a hand to his chest. “You have to hurry.” You swallow hard and look away.

He nods and hurries out of the mansion.

You watch him walk away and it feels like everything moves in slow motion. You’re being dragged back into the room by the guards, your arms ache, but all you can do is watch Taeyong leave. Your heart breaks slowly as you know it will be the last time you see your green-haired lover. You don’t feel the guards tightening rope around your wrists once more.

Jaehyun places an arm along the top of the couch, watching you sit still on the couch across from him.

About 30 minutes pass as you stare at the ground and Jaehyun checks his emails and calendar on his phone.

He finally places it down and grabs your leash.

“So…How does it feel? To be used and thrown away like nothing?”

You chuckle and look up to him. “He isn’t throwing me away, he’s saving his sister..then he’ll kill you.”

Jaehyun only laughs. “Why do you even care for that freak?”

You sigh and rest your back against the cushion. Maybe if you visualize yourself choking the life out of Jaehyun, you’ll be satisfied enough.

“It doesn’t matter to you.”

“Well..do you love him?”

“If I say yes, will you leave us alone?”

Jaehyun laughs again, his dimples showing through even in the dim lighting of the gold-lined room. “Now, you know I can’t do that.”

You laugh. “Of course…coward.. are you scared you’d have to keep looking over your shoulder?”

He smirks, tilting his head as he observes the collar around your neck. “You’re lucky I need you.”

“And you’re lucky I’m tied up right now! You bastard!”

“Hey hey hey..” he yanks the leash, bringing you to the edge of the couch. You steady yourself on your knees to avoid falling off.

“No need to yell, you’re funny, but don’t push your luck with me..” he stares into your eyes and there’s a dark glint in them this time. For once, you genuinely feel threatened and it sends shivers down your spine.

“Boss!” One of his henchmen bursts into the room.

“It was a set up!” 

Jaehyun lets the leash go and stands up. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

The man hands the phone to his right-hand man. You strain your ears to listen and hear they were unable to make contact with the team that set out to kill your members at the meeting. The back up team arrived at the location Taeyong told him about and discovered that Jaehyun’s men were victims of a building bombing. Bombs were set up and detonated when the clock struck 12, killing all of Jaehyun’s men. Your guys were safe, the meeting was faked. 

Taeyong must have met with your guys and devised the plan while he was gone. He knew it was risky, but took a chance anyway, knowing that Jaehyun would trust him if he left you behind.

You smile in relief, but know you’re about to see a side of Jaehyun you’d never seen before.

You can’t help but laugh when you see his face become drained of all color while listening to the person speak over the line.

He throws the phone to the floor, watching it break into several pieces. He stomps over to you quickly and grabs you by the collar, raising you off the couch as you whine.

“Did you fucking know about this?” He takes a knife out of his pocket and presses the tip into the space just below your jaw.

However, you don’t stop laughing, it was about time the bastard felt pain like you did.

“Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t, maybe I don’t even know what you’re talking about.” You chuckle and the knife goes in deeper. You could care less what he did to you, you just wanted your guys to be safe and Haeju to be found before it was too late

He growls then throws you back down onto the couch. “Fucking bitch!”

“What’s the problem? Daddy can’t fix this for you?” You say in an annoying high pitched voice. Jaehyun slaps you hard, making you split blood onto the couch. You go dizzy for a moment, but resume your laughing fit.

“First, I’ll tear him limb from limb, then gonna kill him in front of you!” Jaehyun growls.

You chuckle. “You idiot. You killed him the moment you killed Yuta and took me away, you killed him the moment you made him choose between his sister and me..”

Jaehyun stops his pace and smiles slowly. “Hmmm..you’ve given me an idea actually.. what’s worse than killing someone quickly?”

You sniffle while sitting up slowly. What is he getting at?

He sits beside you, making you slightly nervous with the close proximity. Would he kill you now? “Killing them slowly..what if I *did* marry his sister?..he’d have to see my face, always next to his poor, innocent sister’s, and regret being alive every single day.”

You turn to him, shaking your head furiously. “No..it’s not what Haeju deserves..leave her out of this..”

Jaehyun looks down at you with furrowed brows, taking the leash up slowly into his palm. “Now..now, you’re in no position to be making demands..unless..you’d like me to marry you instead?”

You knew what he wanted. To not only hold his marriage with you above Taeyong’s head, but to gain complete access to your money and assets now that Yuta is dead. 

You chuckle. “You’re insane.”

He stands up. “Fine. Haeju it is.”

You jump to your feet. “No! Neither of us..you won’t hurt him this way, you’ll only dig a deeper grave for yourself if you marry either of us in front of him!”

“Well, sweetheart, I’m quite the daring person, I’d love to see how deep the grave gets…so what- or who- will it be? You or her?”

[10 Days Later]

You’re getting dressed when a notification pops up on your phone screen.

[BREAKING] Body of Young Woman Found, Mutilated by Knives

Your eyes widen. You unlock your phone and read through the article quickly. “No..no, it can’t be.”

“Are you ready?” Jaehyun opens your door and walks in.

“No..this..this can’t be happening..” tears flood your eyes, it was your worst nightmare playing out in real time. The body was confirmed to be Haeju’s. You feel your heart break into pieces. You stumble back and sit onto the bed as everything turns gray. Jaehyun didn’t let you have a phone so you couldn’t get in contact with Taeyong. His guys were also unable to find him. This is why.

He must’ve lost it when Haeju died. There’s no way he’d be back for you now, the one person he truly loved was gone. You wish you could apologize to him, you wish you could console him as he cries.

“Let’s go.. and don’t make me come back.” Jaehyun leaves your room, ignoring the fact that you’re sobbing into your hands after hearing the news. He’s cold-hearted, cruel, unfair, and now, you’re stuck with him forever.

Guilt eats away at your heart for the entire day. You can’t focus on the new responsibilities you’re tasked with as Jaehyun’s wife. You were able to save your guys after everything, begging Jaehyun to allow them to live as they had nothing to do with you and Taeyong’s choices. He could use the men to replace his that passed, and you proved that they were valuable by highlighting their accomplishments. 

You even surrendered everything to him once you married, combining your accounts and giving your businesses to him so he’d take the title as the owner alone. You knew Yuta would’ve cursed you out for giving him everything, but it was all you could do to save everyone. 

Now, with not a penny to your name after all these years, you were reduced to being the wife of a kingpin, a woman whose only duties were to provide a man’s needs while sitting quiet and pretty. It upset you, to feel like just an object after all you’d been through. But this was your punishment after letting Yuta and Haeju down. You deserved this, you deserved to be unhappy for the rest of your life.

Jaehyun was just happy to own you. Taeyong was nowhere to be found to pay for his crimes, he knew sooner or later, he’d be back for you. He awaits the day he gets to kill you both, not until after inflicting so much pain that you beg for death of course. Until then, he’d have to keep you alive.

In the meantime, both you and your men pledged allegiance to him and he couldn’t be happier.

[Three Months Later]

As time goes by, you worry for Taeyong, but you also feel as though you’ve been abandoned again. Could you blame him? You let his sister die. Why would he want to see you? You’re also a practical death trap for him here with Jaehyun.

But still, you wondered why he didn’t care about what happened to you.

“Hey..everything okay?” Xena leans over and asks as you both get pedicures together. If it were up to you, you wouldn’t have taken care of your appearance, but Jaehyun said that he’d never have a disgusting woman by his side for his business partners to see. If you wanted to be claimed as a luxurious handbag for a man, you needed to look expensive like one. And that meant getting all sorts of treatments done to your body daily. It was tiring, but it meant pleasing Jaehyun and in turn, staying alive.

You turn to her. “Not really, but it’s okay.”

Surprisingly, Xena was nice to you. She ended up falling in love with a doctor from the underground hospital she stayed at while healing. You realized it didn’t take much to get her to be head over heels though. She told you she thought she loved Taeyong, but she didn’t, she just liked the attention and his smile.

She knew you were stuck here in this never-ending loop of life while being a wife to Jaehyun of all people. She could see that it was hard and that you missed Taeyong, and the pain in your eyes was satisfying enough. After all, you did cause her to be shot.

Then again, Jaehyun was harsh and she couldn’t imagine being with someone she didn’t truly love.

“Okay..” she nods.

Later that night, you, Jaehyun, Xena and her new boy toy, Doctor Kun, have dinner together. They laugh and have a great time, while you give a small smile and nod. How could you find joy like some regular housewife?

After about two hours, you say your goodbyes and start to clean the dishes.

Jaehyun leans against the counter and looks at your sad face. “It’s been months..when are you going to get over it?” He says sternly as he crosses his arms in disappointment. 

He eyes you up and down in the lavender colored spaghetti strap silk dress he chose for you.

You chuckle. “Get over it? That’s funny.”

He raises his brows. “If you don’t want to do the job of a wife, then I could just kill you and get another, would you like that? How about I relieve you of your duties?”

You look onto him with empty eyes.

“Taeyong would be sad though..” he tilts his head, his mouth tilting upwards once he realizes he’s said the words that will spark feelings in your heart again.

“Oh fuck off, Jaehyun, you need me.”

He steps closer to you. “What I need is for you to smile and stop being a self-indulgent bitch. You make people uncomfortable when you act like that.”

You suddenly throw a dish to the floor and look up at him. He isn’t startled, only amused as he always is when you get upset. It’s like seeing a dog run wildly through the house because he caught the zoomies.

He chuckles.

“Uncomfortable? Jaehyun, I’m in a fake marriage! Oh, I’m sorry if I look miserable, but maybe it’s because I fucking AM! Have you ever thought about that?!”

“And how did you get into this position? Your memory isn’t that bad, is it?” He says smoothly.

He steps closer and you can feel the heat in your cheeks rise. He’s so intimidatingly close, he towers over you and you back away, but the edge of the kitchen counter hits your back.

“All I want is for you to smile..I give you everything, your life is grand and expensive..look at this mansion you can prance about in.” He stands directly above you, eyes staring intently into yours as he smirks.

You can’t help but look away, feeling the intensity might burn right through you if you stare any longer. Jaehyun can practically feel your heart racing.

He wraps an arm behind you and reaches to the back of your head, grabbing your hair clip so it falls loosely to your shoulders. You look back up at him through wide eyes, slightly scared by him in this moment.

He places it onto the counter then leans down. He’s intoxicating as his movements hypnotize you, your mouth opens on instinct. He presses his knee in between your legs, making the fabric of your dress rise. His lips just centimeters from yours, you feel his hot steamy breath enter your mouth. 

But he doesn’t kiss you, instead he places his hand onto your neck and squeezes. You whimper at the sudden sensation of his finger tips digging into your throat. He leans back and looks into your eyes. “Smile.” 

You shake your head, causing him to tighten his grasp. You hold his wrist in an attempt to stop him. “Smile or I’ll kill you right now.”

His knee presses into you harder, giving you friction that you so desperately need in between your legs.

“No.” You grumble out.

He turns the stove top on the oven beside you on. “Don’t push me, y/n.” His husky voice enters your ears.

“I hate you.” You look into his eyes.

With that, he spins you around, grabbing the back of your head and forcing you down onto the stove. You place your hands on the counter on either side. “Stop!”

“Smile!” He presses you down harder against your resistance.

You’re just centimeters away from the stove, feeling the heat decorate your cheeks as it gets hotter with each second.

“Okay!” You cry out, tears now falling out of your eyes.

He lets your head go and spins you around. 

You smile and wipe away your tears for him. 

He finally smiles back and rubs the back of your head. “Good girl.”

He kisses you for the first time, it isn’t nearly as magical as it was with Taeyong, but you welcome the embrace. It has been some time since you last felt lust like this and you needed a release.

Jaehyun wasn’t kind and he wasn’t gentle, but he was handsome and good at winding you up.

You take his shirt off over his head and unbuckle his pants.

He rips the straps off your dress, allowing your chest to be free. He then kisses your neck and shoulders as his hand holds the back of your head. You moan, chills running wildly throughout your body before he takes one of your nipples into his mouth while caressing the other. 

He pushes the bottom of the dress up so you can wrap your legs around his waist as he kisses your neck. He enters you quickly and easily, noting how you were turned on just as much as he was by his actions. He grunts and curses as you cry out his name. Your nails scratch his broad shoulders then his back, drawing out blood as he fucks you against the kitchen counter for the first time. 

“Fuck..” you whimper and shut your eyes tightly. He’s rough and unforgiving with his thrusts, you nearly cry from the feeling of being stretched out to fit him, but within minutes you reach your climax together. 

Jaehyun pants as his head rests on your shoulder. “He’s never coming back, y/n.”

You look down at the knife set to your left, you have him right where you want him. So why don’t you do it? You could end it all now, but you know that stabbing him will only lead to your death.

You had to follow Taeyong’s orders. You had to wait for him. Surely, he’d show up.

You never made love again after that day, you were only lustful for that moment, but never again. Jaehyun wasn’t Taeyong, he’d never be him.

You did, however, help Jaehyun make business decisions and even caught when partners were trying to sell him short.

One day you meet with property owners looking to sell a nightclub. They inform Jaehyun they only wish to receive 30% of the profit from the club, leaving Jaehyun with 70%. They call it a fair deal, but you notice something is wrong.

Jaehyun’s advisor agrees with it at the meeting, but you stop Jaehyun from signing.

“I’m sorry..it’s just, something isn’t sitting right with me..” the men turn to you, their sharp eyes exposing their disgust at you opening your mouth in the first place.  

“Go on.” Jaehyun looks at you and nods. 

But you didn’t need his permission to. You continue. “The club is located in a city with a diminishing population, folks are getting older and leaving to calmer places once they retire. By investing in this club, Jaehyun would be losing more than what he would gain, resulting in immense negative profit for us, and minimal loss for you as you would no longer have the responsibility of upkeep and creating appeal.”

The men are stunned silent, two shift in their chairs and look down.

Jaehyun smiles slightly then looks back at the men. “Well..is my wife correct to assume you are setting me up?”

“No..sir, we’d never do that, please believe us-ah-we just..” one man scrambles to come up with an excuse.

Jaehyun raises his hand. “That’s enough, get out.”

They move quickly, knowing that Jaehyun has a short fuse and would easily end their lives if he felt the need to.

Afterwards, it’s just the two of you in the room. He is impressed by you and even turned on by the way you talk, he wishes he could take you right then and there, maybe even while the advisor watches. Nonetheless, he knows you’ll never touch him again so he chuckles and stands up to leave with his advisor.

“You’re talented and smart, I’m happy I kept you.” He says over his shoulder as you bow.

You grimace while feeling like some sort of pet for the man.

“I was only stating my findings. It was pretty obvious what they’re trying to do.” You stand up straight and meet his eyes, the ones of Satan himself. He never let you have a phone, but he did get you a computer to do research. Of course, he also made sure to track every website you went on.

Jaehyun smiles then closes the door behind him.

[Two Months Later]

You were sitting at your desk when you heard Jaehyun call you downstairs.

You enter the dining room and feel an overwhelming sense of shock when you see him.

Taeyong.

He smiles when you walk in, making your heart melt. You feel a mix of emotions. Happiness, regret, and fear all flood you at once. You wondered why he had dared to enter the lion's den, but you also felt relieved to see he’s still alive and well. 

His hair is an intense raven black color now, but makes him look more mature and just as handsome as he was from the very first day you met him. You want to hug him, to cry with him, to feel his heart against yours once more.

“Sit.” Jaehyun interrupts your thought, he feels ill seeing you happy at the sight of Taeyong.

You do as he says, sitting in the seat between him and Taeyong.

Taeyong is overwhelmed when he sees you. Just as pretty as ever, you look healthy and gorgeous in your lavish jewelry. They weren’t you and he knew that, but he figured Jaehyun would dress you up like a doll just because he owned you. He wanted to kill him so badly, for many reasons. Behind all the glamour, however, he could see the emptiness in your eyes. They were now a dark abyss that had lost hope and he felt bad for being the reason for it. Soon, he’d make it up to you.

“Well..should I kill you or her first?” Jaehyun places his hands on the table and leans forward while smiling.

Taeyong looks away from you and back to Jaehyun with an evil glare. “I’ve come to talk..after some time away, I’ve made the decision to leave everything to you…Jaehyun.” 

You gasp. Was Taeyong really willing to give everything up?

“You expect me to thank you? Why shouldn’t I just kill you and take it? It belongs to our family anyway. Haeju is dead so there goes the idea of our families merging.”

Taeyong shows his irritation at the mention of Haeju and clears his throat. “I guess I should explain the benefit behind keeping us both alive..”

“I’m losing my patience, Taeyong.”

“My businesses are still gaining value with interest as time goes on. Everything imported into my account will automatically be put into yours, but only while I am alive. It is not until I die that the value of these investments will be frozen and assessed by a special agent. Long story short, I’ve made it so that my assets will increase drastically over the next few months and years…so if you killed me now..you’d lose a lot. And no one likes to lose, isn’t that right Jaehyun?”

Jaehyun chuckles. “You sly bastard..”

Taeyong slides two stacks of papers across the table to Jaehyun.

“Just sign it and my earnings become yours forever…”

Jaehyun leans back in his chair. “What’s the other contract for?”

Taeyong’s nods and crosses his arms. “Oh that? Those are just divorce papers for you and y/n.”

Your eyes widen. Taeyong was insane if he thought this would actually work on Jaehyun, but then again, has he ever proven to be sane in the time that you’ve known him?

You look up at Jaehyun whose smile slowly turns downward. Why did he seem to be more upset about the divorce? 

“The papers state that everything y/n owns now belongs to you and she leaves with nothing. Although, I suppose she’s already given you everything, so in that case she will have to pay a certain percentage of her income for the rest of her life to you. 90% to be exact.”

Your brows furrow. You open your mouth to protest at the absurd request, but you trusted Taeyong to have a plan. 

Jaehyun shows his disapproval with the request with his facial expression alone.

“Both contracts state you agree to let us live freely while still benefiting from our hard work.”

You knew Taeyong was smart, but you didn’t expect this sort of courage. Who was this Taeyong in front of you? Maybe Yuta and Haeju’s deaths changed him. Maybe the absence of green hair dye allowed him to think clearly. 

After a moment of silence, Jaehyun laughs like a maniac at the table. You swallow hard. It wasn’t going to work, he was going to kill both of you.

“Guards.” He waves a hand and every guard in the room points their shotgun at you, some point theirs at Taeyong.

“You’re pissing me off, I like having y/n by my side, I own her..” he says the last three words with a snarl.

“Jaehyun!..Please-“

“You don’t have to beg him, y/n, not anymore..and definitely not while I’m here.” Taeyong reaches into his pocket, pulling out a ziploc bag and placing it into the table. 

“When’s the last time you’ve seen your sister, Jaehyun?”

You look closely and find..a finger.

But not just any finger.. one with the initial’s ‘XK’ tattooed onto it. 

Xena. You were with her when she got the tattoo to prove her loyalty to Kun. You draw in a sharp breath. “Taeyong..”

He slides the bag across to Jaehyun who stops laughing and looks closely. 

He holds the blood-stained bag up and realizes it’s his sister’s ring finger. 

He slams it down and stands up. “Where the fuck is she?!” He takes his own gun out of his pocket and points it to you. “Tell me now or she fucking dies!”

Taeyong only laughs “I’m the only one that knows where she is, kill her and you’ll never know where she is..all I can tell you is she doesn’t have much time.” He smiles wickedly.

Jaehyun cocks his gun. “Do you think I’m fucking playing with you?! Tell me now!”

Taeyong leans forward, staring into Jaehyun’s soul like Lucifer readying to claim.  “Sign both contracts and I will tell you. Should the contracts be broken, my lawyer has the right to take all of your assets and put them into a private account.”

Jaehyun grumbles. “Why the hell would I trust you after what you did last time?!” 

Taeyong tilts his head to the side. “Yes, what I did was shitty, wasn’t it? This time, I will go with your men to her location, but first..you must let y/n go.”

You shake your head, knowing that they’ll just kill him after Xena is found. “No..Taeyong, come with me please.” You start to cry. “Don’t leave me again.”

Taeyong continues to impress you, but the biggest surprise of all is that he is willing to give everything up for you, even after you unknowingly aided in Haeju’s death.

He turns to you and reaches his hand out on the table. You take it and sob. 

Taeyong rubs his thumb over it slowly. “It’s going to be okay..he won’t kill me, he’d lose too much, and Jaehyun is too smart to make a mistake like that, isn’t that right?” He turns to look at Jaehyun who still holds his gun out furiously.

After being pushed into a corner, Jaehyun has no choice but to agree. “Fuck..fine!” He signs both contracts quickly and puts his gun down. 

“You better not fucking die quickly.” If there was anything Jaehyun loved more than himself, it was money. From birth, he had access to everything because of it, he was greedy and would do anything to have it. He couldn’t love you, he wouldn’t even try, but he did love the idea that you belonged to him at the end of the day. 

You were just another item for him to have access to because of his wealth and status. The fact that Taeyong was actually able to take something out of his hands like a spoiled baby losing a toy pissed him off. More than ever, he felt the urge to kill him.

“Get her out of my sight!” Jaehyun yells. Some farewell that was.

The guards drag you by both arms from the table and out of the dining room. “Taeyong! Don’t do this! They’ll kill you!”

“Don’t worry, we’ll be okay, I’ll know where to find you, just remember what I told you.” Taeyong yells back before the heavy doors close with an echoing bang.

[The Next Day]

With the help of public transportation and a few nice strangers, you found your way back to Taeyong’s old mansion. You traveled with tears overflowing you during some moments. Taeyong risked everything for you, even harming Xena in the process. How would you see him again? 

You also had nothing but the clothes on your back, no phone, no purse, no money. How would you survive? You’re free from Jaehyun, but at what cost?

You brushed your thoughts away and headed to the only place you felt was home. You hoped he’d pop up one day if you stayed there. You’d persevere no matter how long it took.

Taeyong’s house was now abandoned, and with no gate guard, you walked in easily.

You hoped you had some old clothes there in good condition. You push the heavy doors open and walk in, wiping tears away after the long journey. His mansion was vastly different from the very first night you entered it. Much like your life, it quickly lost its charisma and beauty.

You gasp when you see someone in the shadows. It couldn’t be..

“T-Taeyong?”

You walk closer.

“I’m sorry, love, it’s just me.”

Taeil turns to you. You sob harder as he pulls you into a hug.

After pulling yourself together, you sit down at the table with him.

“Taeyong wanted me to give this to you.” He slides a briefcase on the table.

You furrow your brows. “What..what is this?”

You open it to see wads of cash under a passport. 

“We created a new one for you, he told me to tell you to leave..go somewhere you’d both go and don’t look back.. don’t tell anyone where you’re going, don’t even tell me..” Taeil says lowly.

“B-but I can’t leave, not without him..”

“Y/n..I know it’s hard, but you have to trust him. You already know where he’ll meet you.”

You look down at the passport. 

If you left now, just how would Taeyong find you? You nod towards Taeil and tell him thank you. 

Before he leaves, he turns to you. “I’m sorry.”

You nod, but you aren’t sure why he was apologizing. Did he think Taeyong wasn’t going to make it?

[One Month Later]

When the first two days passed, you were okay. “It’s only been two days, y/n, calm down.” Then days turned into weeks and weeks turned into a month.

Taeyong never showed up. You sit on the beach and take in the sight of the crystal blue water of the Bahamas. You’re right back where you started, regretting the night you met Taeyong and let him turn your life upside down. He put business first, he always has and always will. 

He probably stayed to take care of things with Jaehyun. But then again, what if he was killed? There was no way of knowing now. You didn’t have a phone, you couldn’t risk being tracked. You only had your shack that was adequate for you and the small amount of things you had.

Day after day, you engaged in your routine of having breakfast at a nearby cafe, going to the library to catch up on the news, getting dinner items from the supermarket, then watching the sunset. Oh, and your nightly cry, it was at night that you missed him the most. You missed being in his arms and feeling his warmth around you as you fell asleep. You missed feeling safe and happy.

[One Month Later]

A few more weeks pass and one day, while in the supermarket, you glimpse someone with green hair.

“I must be seeing things, plus his hair isn’t green anymore.” You mumble to yourself and continue shopping.

Then minutes later, you turn the corner to get to the aisle with eggs and collide into someone, making your basket drop as you yelp.

“Oh! I’m sorry.” You bend down and pick your basket up.

“It’s fine, y/n.”

This person somehow knew your real name, and not the fake one from your passport that you told to everyone. Did Jaehyun find you?

You look up slowly to see wavy green hair touching the man’s shoulders. Your eyes shift to his.

“Taeyong-“ you gasp, dropping your basket before throwing your arms around his neck.

He runs your back and smiles while breathing in your scent. “Y/n…my baby.” 

You start to sob into the crook of his neck. “I’m so sorry..I’m so sorry about Haeju.” You sniffle.

Taeyong pulls away and smiles softly. “Let’s go home and talk.”

Taeyong takes you to his home, a new house he purchased with cash he withdrew before leaving. 

You enter it and stare in awe. “It’s so beautiful, Tae.”

“It’s perfect now that you’re here.”

You put your hands on your hips and turn to him. “What took you so goddamn long?” You manage to get out while choking up. You missed him so much, you couldn’t believe you were actually with him.

“Y/n..” he pulls you close and kisses you deeply, you close your eyes and fall into him while he caresses your back. 

“I thought you died.” You cry harder, but he kisses your cheek and wipes your tears. 

“I know..I know, I just had to make sure you were okay first.”

“You don’t get it Taeyong. I’m never okay when you aren’t here.” 

He looks into your eyes, holding back his own tears. You’re more beautiful than ever in his eyes. He wants to kiss you for days, he wants to caress you until he takes his last breath.

“Come with me..” he takes your hand and leads you to his patio where you sit down together in front of the beach. 

He runs his fingers over your hands and swallows hard. “I haven’t..been honest with you..mainly because I haven’t found the time until now..but I need to explain what happened in the time that I was gone.”

Taeyong was different, he spoke more maturely and he was gentler. His hair was green again, but he wasn’t the maniac you met on the first night.

“Okay..”

“Haeju didn’t die..I was able to save her in time at the pit thanks to you, and the private account I told Jaehyun about is actually hers.”

Your eyes widen. “But..I saw it in the news.”

He nods. “I know..I had my guys “burrow” a female body from a morgue, they placed it in the trap after we got Haeju out. The body was so badly destroyed with the bomb Yuta set up, we only had to leave her wallet and belongings there for investigators to confirm her identity. Taeil forced news stations to release the article so Jaehyun could believe her death.”

Your mouth falls open. Haeju was alive after all. You felt relief.

“I dyed and cut my hair, then Haeju and I went to Japan. We both changed our names and she enrolled in a different college while telling her closest friends what happened. She wasn’t too happy about it, nor the fact that Yuta used her, but she’ll be okay…I’m sorry, y/n, I had to protect her.” He looks into your eyes as the reflection of the sun setting hits them, bringing out the depthness of the color. A truly beautiful work of art is in your eyes right before him.

“I see..I’m so happy she’s okay..I wish you could’ve found some way to tell me..but I get it, Tae. I’m just glad you’re here.”

He smiles and hugs you close, bringing you into his lap as he resumes your kiss. You hold his face in your hands and turn your head to give him more access. Being this close to him, feeling his heart race as his hands grip your body, it still isn’t enough.

You pull away. “Before we continue, I still want to know what took you so damn long.”

Taeyong gazes down at your lips, wishing you’d kiss him again. 

He licks his own. “Okay..” he drags his fingers down your arm, making the hair in the back of your neck raise. He had changed since you’d last been together, but he still knew how to make you weak.

[Before Taeyong’s Meeting with Jaehyun]

Xena is in the kitchen cooking when she here’s a knock on her apartment door. “Kun, baby, can you answer that for me.”

Since being shot, she decided to live a “normal” life, while still indulging in expensive things of course. She just didn’t need the drama that came along with the money, and Jaehyun was doing a great job of running their father’s business anyway. When she first decided to work for him, she had her eyes and heart set on Taeyong. He was her incentive, but once everything happened, she discovered that she didn’t love him, she only wanted his attention and with you still around, that would never happen.

Kun made her happy though. He lived a simple life and showed her what true love was.

Kun walks out from his office room and does as she asks. “Who are you?” He eyes the strange man up and down.

“I’m here to see Xena.”

“Who is it?” She shouts out and looks toward the door.

She nearly drops the spatula when she sees him.

“Taeyong” comes out in a faint whisper.

He walks in. “I’m sorry to interrupt you, I won’t take up much of your time actually.”

“Wait..did THE Lee Taeyong apologize?” She crosses her arms and walks toward him. “Kun, can you finish that for me?”

Kun nods and walks into the kitchen, leaving her and Taeyong to talk alone.

“How did you find me?” She asks as Taeyong makes himself comfortable on her living room couch.

He smiles. “Come on Xena, you know how this works.”

“You should be apologizing for putting me in the fucking hospital. You never even visited me. Were you too busy dyeing your hair a normal color?” She sits down across from him.

Taeyong nods. “I’m sorry..it wasn’t supposed to happen that way..”

She rolls her eyes. “So..you disappeared, your girl is married to my brother, I’ve clearly moved on…what is it you want?”

“Haeju..was murdered..I couldn’t save her..” Taeyong shakes his head, his eyes well with water.

Xena leans forward. “Haeju..your sister? No..she-“ memories of Haeju flood her mind as she thinks of when they met for lunch. She was sweet and they bonded well. She had nothing to do with this world and shouldn’t have suffered because of it.

“She was being held captive, but Jaehyun didn’t allow me to get to her in time.”

“I’m..so sorry.”

“I need you to help me.”

“Taeyong, if this is about the merge of our families, I can’t do it anymore, I love Kun and-“

“No..no, it’s not about that..I need to get Jaehyun to let y/n go.”

She chuckles and leans back into the couch. 

“Wow..” she rubs her temple. “You are a man with a serious deathwish. You do know who my brother is, right?”

Taeyong nods and leans forward. “It’s exactly that..he’s your brother, you’re his only weakness.”

“He will never let y/n go, Taeyong. I’ve seen it myself..”

“Seen what?” Taeyong’s brows bunch together. Jaehyun couldn’t possibly be in love with you. He’d kill him on sight if that’s the case. He was already upset with the fact that it was a business marriage and you now carried a last name that wasn’t his.

“Jaehyun is infatuated with the idea of owning her. He watches her like a hawk and doesn’t even let her hang out with anyone but myself. It would be like taking a toy out of a two year old’s hands..”

“Well..it’s not impossible..” Taeyong persists. 

“I don’t know..he’s still my brother after all-“

“Xena..listen to yourself right now. Haeju is dead because of him. None of this is her fault. And y/n being a prisoner for the rest of her life, I know you never cared for her, but do you really think she deserves that?”

She looks to the floor while thinking. “Just what is it that you want me to do?”

Taeyong explains his plan to fake her kidnapping. They “borrow” another body from the morgue, but this time, only cut off a finger and tattoo it to match Xena’s ring finger.

Once the plan was set in motion, Taeyong led Jaehyun’s men to Xena who was in a hotel room sleeping safe and sound.

Taeyong then escaped to the pit to prepare for his departure from the country again. He had to lay low and untraceable once Jaehyun discovered he was tricked again.

[Present Day]

“That’s it?” You look up into his eyes.

He scoffs. “What do you mean “thats it?” You should be thanking me or telling me how smart I am right now, do you know how much planning when into saving you from that obsessive asshole?”

You only smiled while Taeyong went on and on. It was nice to have him back.

“Speaking of..are you sure he won’t scour the world for us?”

Taeyong looks to the water. “He won’t..he’s too preoccupied with other things.”

You lift your head from his chest. “Wait..what DID you do during those months?”

Taeyong’s mouth pulls into a sly smile. “Don’t worry, baby, I took care of everything.”

“Taeyong..”

“No more questions for today.” He puts a finger to your lips.  “Kiss me or I’ll leave for a few months again.” 

You gasp. “Lee Taeyong! Are you insane? Threatening to leave me? Oh you’ve really pissed me off.”

You lift yourself up completely and stop into the bedroom. “I’m going home!”

He runs in after you laughing. “You’re already home! Come back here!”

He spins you around and drags you back to the bedroom, pushing your body into the wall. Your shoulder blades collide with it, but you’re too distracted by his smooth lips and wandering hands to care.

You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him closer as you kiss. His hands rest on your hip, fingertips digging in deeper and deeper as your tongues tangle around each other.

He leads you to the bed as you moan, laying you down before leaning over you and taking your shirt over your head. It has been way too long since he felt you, he was going to go crazy if he waited any longer.

You feel the same way, shimmying off your sweatpants so you can finally feel his skin on yours.

He places his jeans below his hips and kicks them off. He then resumes your kiss while still leaning over you.

You unbutton his shirt, revealing his beautiful tattooed body little by little.

“Tae..I need you.” You whisper into his ear, feeling his fingers release your waist then float down to your apex.

You widen your legs more as he groans.

His eyes leave your face to focus on your pointy nubs begging for his attention.

He licks around both of them as his finger massages your folds slowly but purposefully. Your hands find his hair, combing through his emerald locs while he works both nipples in his mouth. He pushes his fingers in, moaning when he feels how wet and tight you are for him.

Your head falls back into the bed as you grind onto his hand. “Fuck..” it feels good to have him touch you after all this time. His thumb flicks against your clit while he lays sloppy kisses onto your neck.

His lips graze your ear. “It’s been so long, baby, but you still feel so good. I’ve been thinking about you and how you feel around me…” he uses his other hand to play with your nipple in between his thumb and index finger.

You draw in a sharp breath as his fingertips press onto your sweet spot. “Tae..”

“You’re so pretty, I just want to fuck you all day and night long..can I do that? It’s been a while, right?”

“Yeah..” you whimper. He can feel you clenching after hearing his proposal.

“I’ll take you in any position and in every room in this house, would you like that?”

You nod and close your eyes, preparing for the climax of your life.

“This pussy is mine, right? It’s so good, I had to come back for you.” His fingers move fast, he moves his other hand downwards to tap away at your clit. 

You clench even more and grasp his arm. “Yeah..right there.”

“I’m gonna fuck you until you’re round with my kids, we can finally fill this house, what do you say?” His husky tone makes you lose. 

“Yes!” Your nails dig into his arm as your body contorts below him. Your head falls back into the bed while he slows his fingers and kisses your neck.

“Hmmm..it’s been so long, you don’t even remember the rules..”

Your eyes open. “Rules?”

He nods. “I didn’t say you could cum, did I?”

“No..but Tae, it’s been so long I-“

“Shhhh..it’s okay, we have a lot of making up to do..I just hope you’re ready.”

You swallow hard and look into his eyes as he moves further down your body.

“Now..let me taste you.”

He grabs both legs by the crooks of your knees and pulls them apart. He wastes no time and begins licking up your essence. He uses the tip of his tongue to lick in-between your folds and then your clit.

You let out a mewl and place your hand in his hair.

He licks all over, his tongue going deeper and deeper with each swipe. He teases you with light movements from his tongue for a few minutes, making you breathe heavily and curse under your breath. “Tae..please.” You whine.

You try to push him closer but he resists.

“I’m so hard, but I still want to take my time.” He smirks then maintains eye contact while flattening his tongue against you.

You throw your head back. “God..I missed you.”

With that, Taeyong moves faster. You start to ride his face, moving back and forth until you see stars.

He stands up and flips you over so you’re on your stomach with your ass up. “You’re lucky I’m too fucking hard to play with you more.”

“What’s the rush? We have an entire lifetime to play..” you chuckle, but it’s interrupted when he slams himself into you. The breath leaves your body before you groan. “Taeyong!”

“You’re right, I’m gonna enjoy ruining you every night.” He pulls out slowly, enjoying the way your tight opening quivers with him inside it, struggling to adapt to his length fast enough.

He grabs your hair and snaps your neck back. “Ow!” You yelp.

He pushes back in again. “Did you miss this?”

“Of..course..fuck.” You shut your eyes tightly. Taeyong was fucking you to fit him, you couldn’t focus on anything but the grinding sensation of him finally in your body.

Your ass hits his hips as he goes deeper with each thrust. You can’t keep yourself from moaning, listening to how he pants and whispers curses.

“This pussy is so good..I’m going to fill it until you leak all over me..”

His fingertips dig into your hips, leaving a burning sensation and you’re sure you’ve started bleeding.

“Tae..I’m going to..”

“Let me see your pretty face as you do, baby.” He pulls out and lets you turn over on your side.

He kneels and then straddles your leg while curling your other leg around his side.

He holds his hard cock in his hand, brushing the tip against your dripping folds.

He pushes in while looking into your eyes.

His intense eye contact and the way he clenches his jaw makes you even wetter than you were before.

He thrusts into you, watching as you grip the sheets beside you and whine.

This position allowed him to go even deeper while still maintaining eye contact with you.

Your clit was perfectly stimulated and he could watch every cry escape your mouth as well as your breasts.

Here you were, looking perfect as ever for him during the sunset. You always took him well while still looking so pretty. He falls in love with you all over again, gazing at your face, then your neck, your breasts, your stomach, and your thighs. If he could paint you in this moment he would. But he knew he was blessed to have you all to himself. You’re all his finally and falling apart on his cock once more. He had no plans to let this sight go for the next few days. He really did plan on fucking you everywhere and every day.

“Fuck, it’s so deep inside you..” his tongue darts across his bottom lip.

He thrusts harder than pulls out completely. 

“Faster..please.” You beg him while looking at his beautiful body above yours. The way his veiny hands roam your body and keep you in position for him drives him crazy. You can clearly see the base of his dick disappear inside you now, the sight makes you dizzy.

“Of course. Anything for you.”

And with that, Taeyong drills his cock into your pussy, whimpering as it swallows him, begging to be emptied into.

“Taeyong!” You cry out while watching his abs flex and his beautiful body glisten in sweat above you.

He moves fast and places a hand around your neck, knowing that you preferred being quieted this way.

He squeezes your throat and starts to choke you.

Your body moves up and down on the plush bed, your breasts bouncing up and down while he destroys you.

He throws your leg up on his shoulder, his cock his your g-spot repeatedly and you silently go insane. His thrusts are fast, but his sturdy length slides in and out of you easily, never failing to press against your extremely sensitive areas.

“Good girl...take it just like that.”

His tone is low and husky, he continues to choke you while looking into your eyes deeply. The dark glare turns you on even more. Of course you were his, no one gets you to the edge like he does and no one is as beautiful when they try.

And with a few more thrusts, you come undone just as he does, your body shaking once again.

Your eyes roll in the back of your head as he kisses you through it.

It feels like minutes pass by while you experience your most intense orgasm. He ensures you are stuffed with him completely before pulling out.

He lays down beside you and kisses your forehead. “Rest for now..we have a few more days of this to prepare for.”

You laugh. “Still greedy as ever.”

He runs his fingers along your back. “Mhmm.”

“You’ve changed, Taeyong..how could you leave the business behind? You were a kingpin.”

He smiles and kisses your neck. “I guess I have changed, I’ve been too easy on you..”

“I’m being serious..why did you choose this life?”

He sighs. “Well…we never got a chance to talk about it, but…when Yuta died, I realized that I didn’t want that anymore. I didn’t want the pain.. I only wanted to be with you. I need you to be happy and alive. In just a few seconds, all that was taken from Yuta…how could I let that happen to you too? It’s tiring.”

“What is?” You run your hands through his hair.

“Having to watch my back all the time..having to dominate all the time..so I did what my father failed to do..I put love first. I don’t want to lose you and the chance to live happily.” 

You tear up at his confession and kiss him again. 

You made love several times that night after taking a shower. Taeyong made true to his promise to make love in every room, making you cry out his name until your voice became hoarse.

A few days later, you get a job at an insurance agency while Taeyong buys supplies for his craft. He starts painting and selling some of his works, but most of his money is made from investments he executed while staying in Japan. These were done under his fake identity, so technically Jaehyun didn’t have the rights to them. You both live a normal life and just a few weeks later, you hear the good news.

[Five Weeks Later] 

You’ve been feeling ill for the past few days, so Taeyong takes you to urgent care. When you describe the news to the doctor, he states he suspects you’re pregnant.

Taeyong’s eyes widen. “P-pregnant?”

You roll your eyes before looking at him. “Well..you did say you’d make it happen.”

You take the test and confirm your pregnancy.

To Taeyong, you are the most beautiful woman he has ever seen while you grow throughout the months. He takes care of you and makes sure you have everything you need. Massaging your feet and giving you warm showers whenever you asked.

“We’re naming him..Cerulean right?” Taeyong rushes you to the hospital after your water breaks.

“We are NOT naming our baby after a color..oh God this hurts.” You wince in pain as Taeyong speeds through traffic. “Be careful!! You’re going too fast!! You’re driving like a maniac!” Some things never change.

You give birth to a healthy baby boy and name him Cyan. Your hearts grow even more when you become pregnant again soon after, giving birth to a healthy baby girl named Dahlia.

Taeyong is the most attentive father you’ve ever seen, rocking the babies to sleep and feeding them whenever they cried. Of course, it’s the bare minimum, but the man before you blew your mind away. You love him so much.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” He says before taking his shirt off and crawling into bed beside you. He had just put the babies to sleep.

“Oh..nothing.” You chuckle.

He snatches your book away from you. “Hey!” You call out while leaning over him to get it back.

He places it on the nightstand beside him and turns to you with a mischievous smile. “You look like you wanna have a third one so let’s get started..” he tickles your side and nuzzles your neck while you giggle.

[6 Years Later]

You’re heading home after picking the kids up from pre-school.

“How was your day today?” You turn to face them in the backseat of your car.

“It was good, mommy! How was yours?” Dahlia calls out.

“It was good, thank you for asking. Cyan, honey, how was your day?” 

Cyan pouts and looks out the window.

“Cyan got into a fight with a boy because he made fun of his name!” Dahlia swings her feet.

“Oh…Cyan, it’s not good to fight. Solve your problems with words next time, okay?”

Cyan nods, but still pouts while looking out. He couldn’t be any more like his father, could he?

“With that being said, did you win?” 

He flicks head towards you and smiles while nodding. “Yes, mommy!” 

You smile brightly and give him a hi-five. “Good job buddy! But don’t do it again, okay?”

He nods. “Okay, mommy.”

“Alright, let’s go home to daddy.”

Taeyong was out at the supermarket picking up pasta for dinner when you entered the house. The kids run off into the living room as you place your purse down.

“Hey! Who are you?!” Dahlia calls out. Your brows furrow as you walk in after them.

You see Dahlia looking up at a man with long black hair. You gasp when you recognize the person.

You step in front of the kids to block him.

“W-what the hell are you doing here?” You panic. How did he find you? Your home phone is too far away to grab.

Jaehyun maintains eye contact with you, then kneels down and looks at Cyan and Dahlia with a smile. “Hey, little kids…go play in your rooms now. Your mom and I are gonna have a little chat.”

Cyan looks up at you with wide eyes. “Mommy, who is he?” 

Jaehyun smiles widely, but it gives Cyan a bad feeling. “A friend.”

“Y-yes, go to your rooms and lock the doors. Don’t come out until I call for you, okay?”

They do as you tell them. You breathe a sigh of relief once they’re out of sight, then look back at Jaehyun. “He’ll be home any minute now.” You say through gritted teeth.

The man you once saw in freshly tailored suits every day now wore a simple white t-shirt and jeans. His hair was also messier than usual. Dark rings settled under both eyes. He didn’t have any guards around him. Something was definitely wrong.

He steps closer, making you trip and fall into the couch behind you. “I could care less, y/n. I’m here for you. Did you think you could escape me? Taeyong tore you away from me, and that’s never happened before..I always get what I want, y/n.”

You reach behind you to see if you can fish out the hidden gun. “Jaehyun..you have to let it go..it’s been years.”

“Oh trust me…I know how long it’s been, I’m the one who lost everything..Taeyong set me up, he rewrote contracts and by the time I realized it, it was too late. I lost everything…” he looks towards the kids’ rooms. 

“I think it’s time you lost everything as well..I’ll take care of them and we can get going, y/n, just you and me. I don’t have nearly as much money as I did before, but I’ll have you.. rightfully.” He smiles and turns to walk, but you quickly pull the gun out.

He turns swiftly, leaping back to you to get it out of your hands. “Get off of me!” You yell during the struggle.

Then suddenly, you hear a sharp pop echo in your house.

Taeyong speeds towards you as you stare at Jaehyun who stops moving. “Y/n! Are you okay?! Where are the kids?!”

Jaehyun spits blood out and onto your face as you stare in horror. He chuckles before falling to the side and bleeding into his hand from his abdomen.

Taeyong grabs you from the couch. “Y/n! What did he do?!”

You shake your head. “I-I’m fine..the kids are in their rooms. He-“ you breakdown into tears after feeling horrified at Jaehyun’s sudden drop in. 

During the time that you waited for Taeyong, he executed a plan to destroy Jaehyun and it worked. He rewrote percentages behind Jaehyun’s back, causing a negative spiral in profit. Jaehyun’s business partners turned their backs on him, becoming his enemies one by one. He was left with nothing after slowly losing his profit over the years.

Taeyong puts the kids to sleep while you wash your face off. You then burn his body on the beach and sit beside the fire. “Why..didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I didn’t think he’d find us..I was sure someone would kill him once they found out “he” changed their contracts.”

You look towards him, tears in your eyes again. “We could’ve..” you sniffle. “We could’ve lost them, Tae.”

“No..that will never happen, I’ll always protect you, the bastard is dead and no one knows where we are..we’re free.”

You nod, still shaken up by what happened, but he was right. With Jaehyun dead, you didn’t have to look over your shoulders everywhere you went. It was finally over.

Taeyong takes your hand in his and kisses it. “I love you, let’s live happily.”

You give him a small smile. “Ahh Greenie..an entire lifetime with you? What a headache this is gonna be.”

The two of you laugh before heading back inside to your sleeping kids

And so, you raised them together and lived an honest life, enjoying the simple things like beach days and amusement parks as well as teaching your kids about art, how to drive, your responsibility of course, and eventually, how to apply for scholarships. 

Haeju visited every now and then too. The world of underground crime was no longer part of yours. 

Taeyong didn’t think it was possible to escape and be happy with a normal life, or rather he didn’t think he’d feel the need to, but he was wrong. He found someone worth leaving it for. He found someone worth living for. 

[carefulfears]

can you talk about how dd wanted hank to die vs the ending as it is? like. i can't help but love the characters, i wanted them to make it and for things to get better. but things don't really get better? hank tries and sometimes he does better than others. it was always a struggle, and it wasn't just hank. (things i know you've talked about, i just really love what you have to say 💜💜)

i love you so much <33 yeah i think it's a classic "david sowing vs. david reaping" situation in the sense that he's talked about before the magic trick of that character. making him someone that people don't hate. seeing redeeming qualities in him, like loyalty and honesty. putting so much into it, and pulling it off, in a way that doesn't always happen. i really love that character and not because of who he is as a person or any qualification or anything to do with the way we've begun talking about characters in recent years (as though to love a character you have to want to be friends with them) but because i think it's a great character. so much went in to making it a great character.

and because of all of that...you don't want hank moody to die in the end!! i don't want hank moody to die!! but at the same time, duchovny is right. there is this whole alpha male incel culture based around that character (which fascinates me to no end) and a lot of it lacks an understanding of consequence. in duchovny's work and writing, there is always a clear sense of consequence. there are clear morals, a beginning and end, a right and a wrong. he writes fairytales, basically exclusively. and so it makes sense to me that he would want to make sense of this story and character that way, and it makes sense that he never was going to be able to do that. it ultimately just isn't that kind of story.

one of my clearest memories around this show is when you started watching it and you were watching the raw and the cooked, and you were really upset by the ending scene. karen's "angel i love you so, so much" and the break-up and ‘free bird’ and the ring. and you texted me and you kept saying "i love them so much and it's all terrible" and "it was terrible" and "it's insane that i like this man i get why they love him"

and i said "you have to believe that there's a reason why his girls love him so much and you kind of DO." which was kind of the first way that i contextualized that character…you have to accept, if not understand, that there is something in him that people want to save. something worth sticking around for years, weeping on the porch, waiting on the day where everything will “be okay again” (as karen says).

otherwise, it’s just annoying to watch this group of people suffer at the hands of his actions and wait around for more. for that show to work, you have to believe in him. that’s what the first essay that i ever wrote on the series back in october was about, kind of, “the seduction of sunk potential.”

i remember writing that and choosing every word so carefully and thinking of the “sunk cost fallacy,” this concept of sticking with something just because you’ve put too much into it to give up now. and i wrote about what’s “seductive” about hank moody being “sunk potential,” so much in him that could be realized, if only.

that’s a character that always stands out so much to me (especially as someone so idolized by an “alpha male” culture) as being so loving. he’s openly physically and verbally affectionate with his friends, both male and female. i love scenes where he’ll come into charlie’s house and just casually kiss his forehead hello, or want a hug before work. when charlie’s upset hank always holds him. fucking around with marcy, sitting with her legs over his lap (with their spouses and exes in the room). always would walk away from any situation to help someone else. he never left a room without telling his girls and his friends that he loves them (“to my son, the writer. something i never said too much: i love you” / “i love you. i didn’t say it to hear it back.” being the same episode, etc etc). scenes where becca storms out upset with him and he’s just like…. “okay. i love you.” tries again the next day (a lot of that, verbatim, in s4.)

even what i was talking about yesterday with slow happy boys, the way he cries on the beach listening to his old friend talk about his life and health, drops him off at the airport and hugs him goodbye saying “i love you. i love you.” (and his friend being like…… “okay, homo. love you too.”)

“what’s up, mama mia? mind if i join you?” and sitting out on a ledge, offering to help with her writing when it really confused her (“my own father has never so much as offered to help with my homework, so”), the way he always goes to get her and tells her she’s a “good kid” and hugs her goodbye even after everything.

that character was loving in a very specific way that lacked ego (which he had PLENTY of in every other arena so let’s not get crazy), and that isn’t cohesive with the “last real man” archetype that the show catered to and has become associated with.

and that wasn’t necessary to walk the line of keeping him redeemable. keeping him someone that you don’t hate. which they could’ve done in any number of ways, that didn’t risk making him look like a pussy. (a “homo”)

but he has this endearing goodheartedness to him. and my favorite favorite favorite thing about that character, is that it doesn’t matter. it just doesn’t matter.

it all falls second to this extreme cowardice, and weakness, and vice.

it doesn’t matter that he adores those girls and tells them that he loves them every day, when his dad never said it too much. karen tells him that she knows he loves them, but she doesn’t know what that means anymore.

becca says a few times that she knows that she has parents that love her, and that’s a lot, but that her life has been chaotic and hard. there’s that great moment where she says that her first boyfriend makes her feel beautiful, and hank says very matter-of-fact that she is beautiful, and she rolls her eyes that she is not. and he makes her stop and tells her to never say that, that she’s “the most beautiful thing in the world” to him, and she tells him to treat her that way then.

when she asks if he’s ever felt like he has no one and nothing, and he says that he used to feel like that but now has her. and she asks why she still has nothing.

he can pull mia off every ledge for her whole life, shove and threaten every predatory man around her, help her with every writing assignment and forgive her every sin- but he did not tell a grownup what was going on with her.

he played her game. he kept their secret. he does not ultimately save or protect her, and he does it to save and protect himself.

that’s what keeps me coming back to this character. and i imagine that it’s what keeps his loved ones in LA. there is very easily something good there, something worth saving, but it isn’t winning. and as a viewer you can know that it’s not going to, but it doesn’t feel that way while watching.

and so when you think about this question of like…..how should it all have ended? narratively, he should’ve failed. if not death, something like the ending of season 4. i love that scene so much: hank walking through the film set hugging marcy, making charlie laugh. seeing visions everywhere of karen, and becca, and mia. versions of them that aren’t there anymore, that maybe don’t exist anymore. riding off into the sunset alone in the porsche, typewriter in the backseat.

it’s a good ending. not perfect, maybe not even narratively sound. he doesn’t die, doesn’t really lose, except for the fact that he’s alone. which is really the one thing he never wanted to be: “a morning of awkwardness is far better than a night of loneliness.”

but how much are you really going to get, on a showtime comedy? this isn’t a david duchovny novel. isn’t one of his x-files episodes, isn’t one of his films. he talks all the time about how he wanted hank moody to die because he didn’t want him to get away with it, and maybe that’s part of what’s causing so much of the cultural reputation and harmful rhetoric around men. but you’re never really going to realistically get that on this type of show, and perhaps more troubling, you’re never really going to want it.

[thatthoughtatthebackofyourmind]

In Defence of Albus Dumbledore:

Look. I know this is an unpopular opinion, so I’m going to write this here because putting it anywhere else (like at the bottom of the fics which have inspired this frustration) would seem mean, and it would probably end up coming off as unintentional flaming, which I would never do to anyone ever. Also, as I’m less frustrated with individual works than I am with an entire situation, it wouldn’t really be fair to direct it at one specific person.

Get ready. This is going to be very ranty and long and I can't promise not to get off topic and onto a tangent a few times.

I understand that we all have grown up a lot since first reading Harry Potter. I get that once we realized how grey a few of Dumbledore’s decisions actually and the ways in which they affected the characters we love we all felt rightfully upset.

But can we please stop being so narrowminded about it?

There are plenty of redemption fics out there. A lot of them are works that redeem characters like Severus Snape, Draco Malfoy, Draco’s parents, various Dursleys and loads of other people. I’ve seen fics that have Sirius confronting the realities of his juvenal behaviours and having to atone for past wrongs. I’ve even seen (but admittedly never read) fics that redeem Voldemort himself.

But the least popular person for a redemption story in fanfiction by far seems to be Albus Dumbledore.

I get it.

He was supposed to be an infallible genius who did no wrong and he let us down. But please.

Can we all please just admit that we’re using Dumbledore as a stand in?

The hatred we as a fan community levy at Dumbledore is influenced by so much more than his actions in cannon.

It’s the dissolution we feel at growing up. The need as young people to bite back at overbearing authority. It’s the conviction that leaders should never be allowed to fail if failure means the death of innocent people. Even though we can all recognize on a personal level that our failures are typically unintentional and are definitely what make us human.

Of late, it’s very clear that Dumbledore is a stand in for the betrayal we feel at JK Rowling’s anti-trans standing.

We all loved her so much.

She gave us this world.

She promised it to everyone.

And then she said that it was all a lie, and that it was never meant for some of us anyway.

The parallels are clear.

While we were first reading, we loved who Harry loved. Simply because he loved them, and we loved him.

When we grew up, we started acknowledging the ways in which the characters mirrored people in real life, and we chose the people we found the most familiar to love instead. Personally, I understand the reason I read Severitus so often is because I had a largely absent father who I idolized as a child, and that father was a bit of a rockstar like person. Dark, intelligent, and cruel when he wanted to be. Artistic, genius, condescending, and amazing.

As an adult, I still long for his love and approval. Learning that Severus was capable of so much good at the very end of his story, that he was in fact good all along, even when he looked exactly the opposite, gave me hope that my father was too. Even though I now understand that redemption for my father is just a fairy tale it’s still a story I hold close to my heart. A story I long for. It’s a possible happy ending for both a lonely child and a jaded grouchy adult.

Albus Dumbledore was different.

This was a man that we trusted to have everyone’s best intentions at heart. We were told he was safe. We were told he was the smartest man in any room. And then he failed us. And we looked back at all he had done, and rather than seeing the good he had tried to achieve, all we could see were the mistakes he had made.  

I firmly believe that the reason that so many people hate him so strongly now is because we all loved him so much first. Like Harry, we all believe that he was incapable of mistakes. His mistakes in cannon aren’t any more morally condemning than anyone else on the light side.

Keep in mind that I said, “in cannon.” I feel like I need to distinguish that. In cannon, though Harry asked if he could stay at Hogwarts during the summer, he never told Dumbledore about living in a cupboard under the stairs. His letter was addressed to there, but we have no way of knowing whether it was physically or magically written on the envelope. And besides, that letter was signed by Professor McGonagall, not Dumbledore. Harry also never mentioned to him the Dursleys withholding food. Or locking up his trunk so that he couldn’t do his homework. He made it clear that they disliked him, that they thought him a burden, but think. Really think. Dumbledore is the head of a school full of children. How many children misunderstand and exaggerate even in their own minds how much their families dislike them.

Let me be clear; when I say kids exaggerate I don’t mean in terms of abuse. I only mean typical things such as, “My mom’s always grouchy when she gets home from work and she never notices that I’ve tried really hard by cleaning the bathroom if she told me to clean the kitchen before she got home and I decided to do the bathroom because I wanted to clean it instead of doing the dishes and now she’s yelling at me that she just needs me to help her sometimes, and I don’t feel like that’s fair because really I do. Look, I cleaned the whole bathroom by myself! And I straitened up the living room too! The only thing I ‘forgot’ was the kitchen and now she’s acting like I do nothing. This means she hates me and appreciates nothing I do. I am clearly a burden to her, and I should go live under a rock so that she doesn’t have to deal with me anymore.” Really, your mom probably isn’t saying you’re a burden. Your mom is more than likely overworked, over-tired, and almost certainly depressed in a society that doesn’t cater to mental health awareness, and on top of all that she was raised by a generation that was allergic to admitting and self-regulating their true feelings so she can’t articulate that and she’s instead taking her frustrations out on you.

This is wrong, and she shouldn’t do it. But consider. Why didn’t you want to clean the kitchen? Was it because you had a long hard day at school and you’re overworked, over-tired, and definitely depressed in a world that doesn’t cater to mental health awareness, and all you really wanted was a break from the hardest job and you just wanted to compromise by doing the ones you felt emotionally and physically able to do? Because I promise, that’s probably exactly how your mom feels about the damn dirty dishes that she’s going to have to deal with before she can make dinner after being cussed out and yelled at by customers and or bosses all day in between doing her actual work and that’s the real reason she’s yelling.

Because, though a lot of teens believe otherwise, parents are still just people and the feelings that overwhelm kids still overwhelm adults just as badly. And they’re even less likely to know how to help themselves because they didn’t grow up with the internet where everyone shares their feeling and gets back validation and advice, so they mostly just believed those feelings were personal failings that indicated something broken specifically only in them and that they should learn to live with it and never tell anyone ever because complaining is for babies and liberals. Okay, maybe that last bit is a little too specific to my own mother, but you get the idea.

It’s a cycle that’s been going on for years. Hopefully, we can eventually all learn how to communicate peacefully and compromise on chores sometimes so we can end it someday. Or everyone can just switch to paper plates, and then we’ll worry about how we’re killing the planet later and no one will have to do the dishes ever again.

The point is, while that isn’t the best parenting style, and it can cause issue’s with your familial relationship as you age, it isn’t technically abuse. And it especially wouldn’t be considered abuse in the 90’s while Harry Potter was taking place or the early 00’s when it was being published.

Harry was not bruised when he arrived at Hogwarts. He didn’t show obvious outward signs of abuse. He never told any adults what his life was like at the Dursleys at all. He really didn’t even say much about it to Ron or Hermione either. Mrs. Weasley sent him treats for his birthday, which was a sweet motherly gesture. Hermione and Hagrid did as well but think about it. Do you believe for a second that if Molly have-another-serving, can-I-get-you-some-more-bread, try-the-potatoes Weasley honestly thought the Dursley’s were starving Harry that she would first wait until the end of July to send Harry anything, and then only send him sweets? She would scale the Dursleys’ house and stuff a full six course meal through the bars multiple times a day before she let that boy live off stale birthday cake. When she asked if the Dursley had fed him enough she meant it in the same way she always meant it, in the if ‘I can feed the world I can love the world’ way.

 Hagrid sent him rock cakes, but again, think about it. Hagrid had shown up with a cake for Harry’s birthday the day he first delivered the letter when he couldn’t have yet known of the way Harry was treated. He just wanted to show Harry he was loved and missed.

Of the people who sent him food, only Hermione really knew Harry didn’t get to eat his fill at the Dursley’s and she still only sent cake because all she knew was that he was being forced to diet with Dudley. Which is why she sent him the kind of food one would eat if they weren’t on a diet instead of true sustenance. A fourth of a grapefruit as a meal is not a diet, no matter what Petunia called it. And if he had told Hermione specifics, she likely would have told Harry that, but again, he didn’t tell anyone specifics.

 Everyone knew that Harry was unfavoured by the Dursley’s and that they wouldn’t be celebrating his birthday, and he wouldn’t receive cake or presents, but they really didn’t know much else. Ron and Hermione only understood he was being starved in the way most naive well-fed kids from happy families can understand. It sounded cruel, and they did try to tell people, but because they didn’t understand the full gravity of the situation, they couldn’t properly communicate to trusted adults that Harry was actually experiencing abuse. Plus, Harry tended to downplay it even to them.

When Dumbledore speaks about knowing Harry would come from a less than happy home, you can tell he is picturing a world where Harry is liked second best to his cousin. Where he never feels fully at home. Like an overextended visitor in a relative’s house. He thinks they’ll treat him like the weird cousin who came to stay and never left rather than an immediate family member.

He isn’t picturing Petunia Dursley slinging a frying pan at Harry’s head. Or refusing to let him drink his fill of water on a hot summer’s day spent weeding her ridiculous flower garden. Or an overly restrictive diet enforced on an already undernourished body simply to make Harry’s morbidly obese cousin feel better about his doctor changing his eating habits.

I think we’ll all agree that feeling less than welcome by stuck up relatives sucks, but it’s better than whatever Voldemort’s loyal leftover followers will do to him if they manage to track down the person responsible for their dark lord’s downfall.

I understand why a lot of people feel like Dumbledore should have just put Harry under the Fidelius Charm and hid him rather than sending him to the Dursley’s but consider: If Dumbledore trusted Sirius the way he must have done to not betray James and his family, then it makes sense that he felt Fidelius was no longer an option. He fully believed Sirius was the secret keeper. Sirius, the Potters, and Pettigrew were the only ones to know of the change. It’s likely that after learning that the Death Eaters had convinced Sirius to betray the Potters he was jaded enough to take it as a sign that no one could be a trusted Secret Keeper. No matter how much they loved the person under protection.

He also likely would have insisted on a trial for Sirius had Sirius himself not told everyone that he was the one who killed James and Lily while descending into hysterical laughter. We know what Sirius meant, (he felt responsible for them dying because switching to Peter at the last minute had been his idea) because we read the third Harry Potter book, but Dumbledore didn’t have that same advantage. All he had was the word of an apparently mad man. A man who had just tracked down another dear friend and apparently killed him and 12 innocent bystanders in a fit of insanity.

Why, when last he had heard Sirius was the Secret Keeper, would he doubt a verbal confession from a man who did nothing to try and save himself from Azkaban? The Marauders never told anyone of their animagus abilities. No one but Sirius could have understood what Peter had done. Why do we expect Dumbledore to have known better?

So, instead of Fidelius and hiding Harry away for his entire childhood, he gave him the best protection he could think of under the circumstances he had been given. He sought to give Harry a normal life and to keep him safe from the remaining Death Eaters.

Dumbledore understood that fame was power, and that power could corrupt even the best of people with the strongest of minds, so he kept Harry away from the limelight. He also understood how fickle people where about fame. This was the right decision even if the Dursley were a bad choice in guardians. We saw proof of this numerous times while Harry was at school. His fame only ever seemed to bring him more hardships. In book two they said Harry was a dark wizard because he was a Parselmouth and that that’s how he overpowered Voldemort. In book four even some of Harry’s friends refused to believe he wasn’t just a glory hound and that it hadn’t been him who entered his name in the tournament, but rather someone trying to kill him. In book five, almost everyone refused to believe Harry was telling the truth about Voldemort’s return. Every single time Harry’s name entered the limelight, it was in a way that harmed him. Imagine how much earlier it would have started had he grown up in the wizarding world. They would have been debating his kindergarten finger paintings if they could have.  

Why does the entire fandom also assume that Dumbledore thought of himself as the wisest most all-knowing man in any room? The only people who canonically acted like they believed that about him were the Golden Trio, and they were enlightened otherwise multiple times throughout the books as they grew up. Just as everyone learns new truths about trusted adults they thought of as perfect as they grow.

The fact is, Albus Dumbledore has always been just a man.

He was a great and powerful but flawed man who wanted more than anything to make sure that evil could not prevail. He obviously still holds plenty of shame and guilt over his dealings with Gellert Grindelwald in his misspent youth. We have surmised that when he looked in the Mirror of Erised he likely saw his sister Ariana, or something as equally heart-breaking which he recognized as his own fault. He fully understood that he was just a man. He encouraged everyone to understand that fact about Voldemort as well.

He was not a god, and he didn’t pretend to be.

Not in cannon anyway.

Fanon Dumbledore, on the other hand, tends to be anything from a meddling idiot to a full on manipulative dark lord complete with moustache twirling and nefarious intent. Which, I believe, further influences and enforces the fandom’s collective bad opinion of him. Most of us haven’t reread the real books in years. It gets hard to remember at some points what was something he did in canon vs. what was something he did in fanfiction.

 Every other character seems welcomed to grow in the world of fandom.

Severus was canonically a willing Death Eater in his youth, a bully to children in his care in his adulthood, and a petty grudge-holder who couldn’t let go of the past. We accept that we can’t fully know how much of his behaviour towards the students was an act to fool the Death Eater’s children, but we can assume it definitely wasn’t all of it. Still, he gets plenty of redemption fics. He had literal access to Harry’s traumatic childhood memories but still saw no signs of abuse because he was too busy trying to keep a 15-year-old child from gaining any ammunition about his own past.

Looking back, it seems obvious that as very few of Harry’s childhood memories were shown in the Occlumency scenes, he likely wasn’t as bad at clearing his mind as either he or Snape assumed, but it was also possible that Severus didn’t see those memories because that wasn’t what he was looking for. The memory of Harry getting chased up a tree by Marge’s dog as the rest of his family watched and laughed should have triggered at least a couple of red flags, but Severus was typically determined to only see the bad in Harry, so he overlooked it.

James Potter who is often thought of as the better choice for Lily was also a bully. And he spent years relentlessly pursuing a relationship with someone who had never given him any indication that his advances were welcome and had in fact outright told him the exact opposite of that many times until he finally wore her down and convinced her to give him a shot. That’s gross, unacceptable behaviour but I guess it is technically better than dating a budding racist that sees you as the exception to his views on your people, so James is rebranded as a lovable hero who changed after having a slightly misspent youth rather than a mean spirited bully who likely grew bored with his main target once he no longer saw him as competition (there would have been no reason to bully Snape if Lily wasn’t friends with him anymore after 5th year which was conveniently around the time he began to “grow up”) as well as a pushy loser who wouldn’t take no for an answer even though Lily said it multiple times. (There’s also the point that once Snape knew about Lupin being a werewolf, James likely wouldn’t have bullied him anymore so as not to provoke Snape to reveal the secret and get Lupin thrown out of school and possibly killed.)

Ron told Molly outright that the Dursley’s were starving Harry and had fixed bars on his windows to trap him after weeks of being concerned when he didn’t reply to Ron’s letters, and she still ignored it, assuming instead that Ron was exaggerating and never even tried to check with Harry to learn that he wasn’t.

Remus spent a year teaching Harry individualized lessons to repel Dementors and never once asked him why he was so sad that they affected him in ways that none of the other students experienced. I mean really, he couldn’t have been the only orphan attending that school so Remus couldn’t have thought it was just that. And Neville’s backstory was nearly just as sad (and just as well known to Remus) and even he didn’t faint like Harry. Yet, he didn’t question Harry once.

Sirius (who is also a bully and a petty grudge-holder) never wondered why a child would want to move in with an escaped prisoner who he had never met before that had just mangled his best friend’s leg and tried to commit murder in front of him instead of the relatives he had been with his entire life. Even when until that very night he had believed that prisoner wanted to kill him?

Arthur actually met the Dursley’s and saw Vernon’s rage at magic when he came to collect Harry for the Quidditch World Cup and he still questioned nothing.

Half the Order found Harry locked inside his bedroom with locks affixed to the outside of the door, and all they did was give vague unfulfilled threats to Vernon and send Harry back. You could blame that on Dumbledore, but I think that’s ridiculous. They were not under Imperious. They made their own decisions. Every adult there had a responsibility to that child, and they all failed him individually.

Yet time and time again I see Dumbledore condemned so overwhelmingly in the very fics that redeem and or absolve these other characters of those very actions.

Even McGonagall, who knew from the start that the Dursleys were awful people, never pulled Harry aside as his head of house and asked him anything about his home life. And, as I stated earlier, her name was the one on the letter addressed to the cupboard under the stairs. She also made it very clear that she wasn’t someone for Harry to confide in by constantly dismissing any concerns he presented her. The way she reacted about the Stone was ridiculous. And her non-concern over the amount of detentions Harry received from Umbridge followed by the ‘have a biscuit’ scene rubbed me the wrong way. And yet, of late she seems to be revered in the fandom community as some kind of badass grandmotherly character. All because she protested one time about leaving Harry with the Dursleys and then never brought it up again.

It’s getting a bit ridiculous. I’m exhausted by the way the fan community continues to rewrite cannon to fit their dissatisfaction with our once trusted role-model JK Rowling through Harry Potter’s once trusted mentor Albus Dumbledore.

Just once I would like to read a Harry Potter fic without having to think about the various ways in which JK Rowling let us all down. And with everyone rewriting Dumbledore as the ‘real villain all along’ I can’t help but be taken out of the fic and forced to relate it to reality.

[adashulaz]

The Dragon Prince season 6 spoilers, the spoilers won't cover the entire season, only episode 6 so if you don't want to get spoiled then don't read this lmafo.

While Viren was writing that letter/note for Soren about why he became the man he did, I didn't think I could hate him more than I already did. Because wdym Viren has always hated Soren??? That makes everything so much more worse imo, especially when you see how Viren treats Soren in earlier seasons. He wasn't just being a bad dad, he was being horrible because he hated his son. And he admits he hates Soren because he blames Soren for everything that happened.

Ig it makes sense since Lissa did end up leaving after Soren was healed but not because of Soren. She left because she believed Viren became a monster. Which is honestly true, he did become a monster and only tried to redeem himself because he died so he believed he was on the path of freedom and wants to go back to Katolis. He wanted to see his son(i guess because he never once mentioned Soren when telling Claudia that he wants to go back to Katolis and never once brought up Soren when telling Claudia they could be a happy family again).

So Viren blaming Soren feels like he can't handle the fact that he was the one to ruin their family. Soren didn't do anything, Soren was basically a young child(I'm assuming hes five during the flashback since he can form proper sentences but still has that itty bitty baby voice yk?) who was struggling to live because he couldn't breathe properly. While it makes sense within Virens character because he tends to shift blame so he can seem like he's the innocent one, it's makes Soren calling his father a bad guy hurt.

It hurts because we now know that Viren has always hated Soren. That Viren has hated Soren since Soren was a small child. It makes their entire relationship, all of their interactions so much more worse. Because we know that Soren used to love his dad while Viren used to hate his son. And then it just switched, swapping their relationship around. Soren no longer loves his dad while Viren is starting to love his son.

And Viren kinda just died because he didn't want to use Sorens heart so ig that gets him a point in being an ok person for doing the bare minimum.