#chapter 5 is the most vague. Bad Effects Part Two

[orcelito]

The fascinating thing about my limited planning records for writing is that I will go back to something after months of not thinking about it, & I have to try to parse what I meant through the barest hints of notes recording the different themes of the planned chapters

Ft "bad effects" and "bad effects pt 2", which were nearly all of what I have written for chapters 4 and 5 of Summer Nights lmfao

[bitch-biblioklept]

The Darkling x f!oc

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 <you are here> Part 7

Chapter-6: Amplifiers

Chapter Summary: Frustrated with Alina's lack of improvement, the Darkling finally found a way to use her powers for his thirst for revenge.

Word Count: 2.1k

(My gif)

The Darkling knew what he had to do, and went to the bitter old woman his mother had become to inform her of such. He still cared about her opinion, no matter how old he’d grown… even if it had bothered him a lot. She wouldn’t react, most likely.

“I have decided to give Alina an amplifier,” He declared once inside the heat of her hut by the lake. “Hopefully we will find the stag.”

Her head snapped in his direction at the mention of the stag. Her dark eyes looked livid. “Of course,” she muttered, half to herself. “I was a fool for thinking for a second that you’d let her have it.”

“The girl is naïve, she can’t control her powers.” He explained. “She will do better with that.”

“I’m not going to let you take control of her powers.” She said with the certainty of a decision. “I know what you are planning to do.”

“How would you?” The Darkling asked, his lips set in a sneer.

“I gave birth to you, boy.” Baghra said. “I know you better than you think I do. She wouldn’t have wanted this.”

“But she isn’t here to stop me now, is she?” Aleksander said. The lump in his throat was suddenly too much. The lakeshore was a bloodbath again. Baghra was silent for too long. “Well?”

“She isn’t,” His mother agreed slowly. “But the least you could do is honor her memory, her mannerisms.”

“She wasn’t a saint mother,” He reminded. “By all means she was the viler and crueler one of the two of us.”

“Not to someone who hadn’t wronged her,” Baghra added.

“I shall avenge her, whether you like it or not, mother.” The Darkling said. He still had a vague memory of the last time he had addressed her as such. Aleksander had been too distraught, everything had happened just so fast… there was no time to tell if it had been reality or a nightmare. Serephina had been assassinated, found lying with her throat slashed, there were others too, her attackers, only one of them was barely breathing by the time he had gotten there.

That was the first time he had used the Cut in the Little Palace grounds, the first time all the young Grisha realized why everyone was so afraid of him. It was the first time his mother looked terrified.

They were supposed to be happy, it was supposed to be a celebrations filled night. But like Serephina used to say in her Suli sayings, some had jinxed their joy. They were to be a family, they were to become parents.

But all of that had been taken away because he was the Darkling and she was Lady Kirigan, and not Aleksander and Serephina.

A light knock at the door brought him out of his thoughts.

Alina appeared in the doorway a second later, looking awkward on finding she interrupted their conversation. “Sorry,” she said.

“In girl, don’t let the heat out.” Baghra declared instead.

The Darkling bowed as a show of courtesy. “How are you Alina?” he asked to be polite.

“I’m fine,” Her voice sounded forced.

“She’s fine!” hooted Baghra. “She’s fine! She cannot light a hallway, but she’s fine.”

The Darkling had to resist the urge to roll his eyes at her words. “Leave her be,” he said instead.

The old woman narrowed her dark eyes at him. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” she decided.

He ran his fingers through his hair in an attempt to alleviate his frustrations. This was not going well. He turned to Alina. “Baghra has her own way of doing things.” He explained to stop himself from snapping at his mother at the moment.

“Don’t patronize me, boy!” she screamed at him. For a second, he was eighteen again, afraid of his mother’s wrath upon finding about his and Serephina’s marriage, and stood up straighter.

He stopped himself in time, remembering he wasn’t the same boy he had been then, not anymore. “Don’t chide me, old woman,” he said in a low, dangerous voice.

There was an intense stare down between the two of them, the tension so thick it could have been sensed even by a donkey. That was until Baghra turned to Alina and said, “The boy thinks to get you an amplifier. What do you think of that, girl?”

He watched as Alina’s face brightened with a smile as if she had heard the most brilliant idea. And for a second, a brief moment, she reminded him of Serephina again, with the curve of her smile and the way her eyes crinkled with joy.

“I think it’s brilliant!” She nearly squealed. And the similarity was gone. Alina was not Serephina, and the differences got more evident as he got to know her better. Serephina’s face had always had a cold mask, much like himself, but he knew how to read her, where to look for in those brown eyes to find the answers. She was a book meant to be read just by him, and him only. Alina’s face was an open book left for everyone to read.

Baghra let out a disgusted sound, and the sound inspired an odd sense of pride in him. Alina was right where he needed her to be.

“Alina, have you ever heard of Morozova’s herd?” he asked.

“Of course she has. She’s also heard of unicorns and the Shu Han dragons,” Baghra said mockingly. If this woman wasn’t his mother, he would have kicked her out by now, but alas.

The Darkling took Alina out of the hut instead, wanting to have one conversation where Baghra didn’t interrupt him at every utterance that came out of his mouth. Though he was aware that she was keeping an eye on everything he was going to do.

“That woman,” he muttered to himself, running his hands all over his face. Then he ran his hands through his hair again, but this time to get the embarrassing image of him hiding behind Serephina to be safe of the rage Juris had upon finding out about the wedding.

“What?” he asked; half-embarrassed by the humor on Alina’s face.

“I’ve just never seen you so … ruffled.” She said.

“Baghra has that effect on people.”

“Was she your teacher, too?”

She was. Of course she was, she was his mother. But she wasn’t just a mother or teacher, she had been through a lot with him, suffered as bad as he had. Perhaps she was the only person alive who would bother to understand Aleksander and not the Darkling. “Yes,” he said in its place. “So what do you know about Morozova’s herd?”

Again she talked about how she had heard children’s stories. Again he told her what he wanted her to, making a passing remark about forgetting how new she was to all this. He was keenly aware of the raven-like gaze Baghra kept on both of them, but he ignored it. Again he was nice to Alina, listening to her talk by the lakeshore when the image of the bloodbath resurfaced. He turned his thoughts to less painful things like how things would have been different had Serephina been here.

After a while, he had had enough and he left. He was desperate for a glass of kvas, or even better, a glass of strong whiskey. The memories wouldn’t just stop invading his head.

So he focused on the night he thought Serephina was going to die.

It was a cold night after a snowstorm, a village in central Ravka that had once been free of the abomination of creation that most people called the Shadow Fold or the Unsea. They had stopped by the village while they were on their way to Fjerda.

 There was a pack of large wolves tormenting the villagers, and they had warned them against going out at night. But Serephina had wanted to see them, the wolves. She said something was calling out to her, and that she needed to see the wolves.

And refusing to let her go out in the danger all alone, Aleksander had accompanied her. He was scared, of course. He had always been afraid of the dark but he never showed it, but she knew. He knew that she knew. That was why she had been holding his hand, warming the both of them up to keep them through the night.

It was a little past midnight when Sere had lost hopes of seeing the wolves and they were about to head back, when a deep growl sounded somewhere to their left.

A pair of bright red glowing eyes were fixated on them dangerously. She let go of his hand and shoved him behind herself and then reckoned the alpha wolf closer. Aleksander’s male ego would have been hurt if he weren’t so scared.

The wolf was one of the biggest animals he had ever seen, standing taller and either of them. For a moment he was certain the wolf was one of the Grisha of the old stories, the shape-shifters who couldn’t turn back into their human form after being in their animal form for too long during the first Ravkan war.

Before Aleksander could think of an escape route, Serephina had moved forward, studying the animal. Its dark black fur was blacker than anything he had ever seen, but it gleamed against the white snow under the moonlit canopy. The wolf and the girl regarded each other, assessing the danger.

The wolf leaped in the air with its jaw spread open to attack Serephina faster than he could say, “Stop!” She didn’t leave her ground and raised her hands, shoving them forward with all the force. The wolf fell to the ground as if hit by an invisible wall.

And when her flint sparked up from her sleeve, the cold blue flames scared the large animal. But it got up, shook the snow off its fur and got back into the battle.

Ice, air, fire all of the three elements helped Serephina in her conquest. She even used a bit of the heart rendering powers that she had mastered and paralyzed the wolf, after some of their blood had splattered on the snow, frozen like red pearls.

She walked to the laying wolf, limp in her step from where the wolf had bitten her leg, her hidden knife in hand and stabbed the wolf right where it heart would be. And strangely, the wolf looked proud when she did it, and then raised its paw and scratched it through her chest, right where her heart would be.

Aleksander’s soul left his body in that instant.

The soft glow of moonlight that came from Serephina showed her face, bloodied and contorted in pain, as both their blood flowed freely to the ground, freezing instantly on the snow. The wolf was the first one to close its eyes, the glowing red disappearing.

She fell on the snow next, her breath escaping with a sigh.

He rushed to her side, almost blinded by the brightness of the light she radiated, and cradled her head in his arms, regretting not staying back at their little cave, not being able to convince her to stay, not being able to protect her because of his own fears.

Then her eyes opened, and her thin lips moved, muttering his name. Her eyes glowed bright red, like the wolf’s but the voice was hers, for no one else could ever speak in that musical voice that made him want to drop everything and just listen to her talk all day.

“Sere…” he softly said, tucking her black hair behind her ear.

“I’m fine,” she insisted, and then stood up. Her hair was a mess, her eyes looked tired, but they were back to their brown, and her clothes were ragged, covered in her own blood and the wolf’s, but to him she had never looked more beautiful.

“But the wolf-” he started.

“The wolf is one with me now,” She calmly explained. Her eyes changed to the bright red once again. “I am the wolf and the wolf is me.”

“Like the amplifiers,” he realized.

She smiled. “Let’s go. I’m starving.”

“I hope you don’t eat Grisha for meals now,” He joked.

“I might eat someone if he gets too annoying,” she winked at him and walked away. Aleksander was frozen in his place.

The wolf was old, she knew everything. Serephina had always had an answer to his problems. Things would have been so much better had her and their child were with him right now. He would have been so much happier and maybe they would have been done with the fold by now.

But fate always had other ideas.

[captnjacksparrow]

So does Kishi officially hate NH and SS? Because I can't help but think like that when I see them in Boruto. Like no way he wants them to be seen as happy or content. Also, it seems like he still hates Sakura because just just look at her, she hasn't really changed. Her dynamic with Sasuke hasn't really changed. She gives chase, Sasuke ignores. Except Sasuke looks more depressed.

Hey, after fifteen years of us chasing after the story and characters we invested in so much, at least give us some indication that they are least happy after sooo many sacrifices, like they deserve that happiness.

But no, if anything, they seem totally miserable. What made Kishi do that? Yes, he can't show them ooc, but Sasuke marrying Sakura is already ooc. Naruto being a bad father is already ooc. Like why go to the extent of showing Sasuke trying not to touch Sakura and pointedly showing that they never kissed? That's just like a determined effort on Kishi's part to show that their marriage is not working. Naruto works way more than any of his predecessors and sleeps in the office or couch so as not to disturb Hinata, when Hinata is specifically designed to accommodate anything that Naruto might require.

Don't get me wrong, I think Boruto is trash. But I am still in interested in SNS in Boruto because that's still canon. Just makes me wonder how Kishi will finally conclude SNS, because their bond still shows clearly in Boruto. Do you think he will kill them any time soon?

Good ask, Anon☺️☺️❤️❤️

Before answering this, I am going to tell you that I don’t watch Boruto. But I know what happened so far, vaguely. Like, Gaiden arc, Karma seal, Kawaki adoption, Kurama’s death, loss of Rinnegan, Time travel arc. Anyways, I might have missed many interactions between Sasuke & Sakura in the filler episodes or other canonical episodes. I would be happy If you send me an episode list or timestamps in where they interact, so that it saves my time instead of me, watching that entire shit show. 

So does Kishi officially hate NH and SS?

In this post, I dissected SS from a non-SNS perspective. It seems Kishi went all out of his way to make their interactions too insincere, blunt and toxic. I mean Sasuke’s absolute lack of interest in her was very evident even until chapter 693. That is right before, their final VoTE fight. And even after Sakura comes to heal their injuries, he just said ‘Ummmm..... I guess Sorry’... 

Kishi could have made Sasuke say some corny shit to Sakura like how he felt bad inside for hurting her, how he missed her, wiping her tears or whatever (Puke!!!! 🤮🤮🤮). Because in the previous chapter, Sasuke basically confessed to Naruto internally about how he felt about Naruto when he was a child. Kishi could have done the same for Sakura in just 4, 5 panels. But anyways, my point is, Kishi’s moment to salvage that ship is chapter 699. 

But he didn’t.

Did Kishi tried to build their bond after marriage?

He definitely could’ve. But he didn’t. 

This shows his clear distaste in SS.

As for NH, Kishi is indifferent. He neither hates them nor loves them. Kishi created Hinata as a pairing fodder and she still is. 

Also, it seems like he still hates Sakura because just just look at her, she hasn't really changed. Her dynamic with Sasuke hasn't really changed. She gives chase, Sasuke ignores. Except Sasuke looks more depressed.

Hmmm, I don’t know whether Sasuke hates her, anon. Again, maybe I’ve missed those parts. But when he looks at her, it’s always filled with regrets and an urge to avoid her (like Itachi avoided Sasuke, but for totally sad and genuine reasons). 

But this again begs the question, ‘Why feeling regret or hesitant even after 12 years?’. 

Believe me anon, Love/Bonds/Understanding can happen at anytime of your life. From where I come from, not everyone marries out of love. Arranged marriages are common. But still, many couples make effort and work out their difference, and find love. Kishi could’ve done the same for SS too. 

Is Sasuke that heartless? No.

He was once a boy who bear hugged his brother every time Itachi comes back from the Academy. Itachi’s presence itself made Sasuke so happy. 

Did he become heartless after the massacre? Also no.

Even after the trauma, Sasuke just became aloof and cold. But he always becomes a child who can pout, be silly, becomes animated, bicker around Naruto. So, he can be lovely, but only around the people he choose by himself. 

Still, Sakura is not that person. So, he looks like he is depressed and wants to escape from her at any given chance because of a certain guilt. 

What made Kishi do that? Yes, he can't show them ooc, but Sasuke marrying Sakura is already ooc. Naruto being a bad father is already ooc. Like why go to the extent of showing Sasuke trying not to touch Sakura and pointedly showing that they never kissed? That's just like a determined effort on Kishi's part to show that their marriage is not working.

To answer, this goes way back, anon. 

Kishi is a person who prefers to write love through intense friendship, sensei-student dynamics and brotherhood. He can occasionally write cute and sweet romance but it can only be short like 2 or 3 pages... or a chapter, max. He can’t go on doing it for 70 chapters for romance. Which was evident from Minato & Kushina, Dan & Tsunade, Obito & Rin. 

But the real deal of Naruto manga is the bond between Naruto and Sasuke. The bond between Itachi and Sasuke also played a huge role in this series. And then comes Hashirama and Madara, Jiraiya and Naruto, Kakshi and Obito, Kakashi and Naruto and many more. So, Kishi pretty much gave an ending he wanted for a long time in chapter 699. He successively pulled off a great manga without corny and shitty romance but with just friendship and brotherhood alone. He didn’t give two shits about NH or SS before chapter 700.

Naruto series’ another success lies on it’s characters tragic backstories. I simply loved them all and most of them made me cry. 

Kishi wanted to move on from Naruto.

But then Money played a big part. Naruto series can be milked in a lot of ways. Editors wanted all the characters to become some baby making dolls. So you have to create pairings. Based on the popularity polls, they decided NH and SS.

In my opinion, Sasuke is a goal-oriented person. He is a wanderer who works on his own accords. Ever since he left Konoha when he was 13, that was his path, so you can’t make him stay in one place. At every stage of his life, he had different goals.

At age 8-15, he had one goal. To kill Itachi. Can he have a romance here? Nope.

At age 16, his goal is to destroy Konoha. No chance of romance in that dark path.

At age 17, he wanted to Revolutionize the shinobi system. Since he wanted to be alone for that goal, no possibility of romance.

At age 18, he adopted Naruto’s dream as his own. To make all shinobi cooperate and look out for Kaguya remains. Romance cannot happen here as he was constantly wandering around and he prefers to work alone.

This is how Kishi designed Sasuke’s character throughout.

Now all of a sudden, if you ask Kishi to go OOC by asking him to write corny romance for his favorite character Sasuke just for the sake of making him relevant to Boruto series, what will he do? 

Since Boruto is a series which is a sequel to Naruto, you pretty much know everyone’s backstory. Those 12 year old New Gen kids possibly can’t have tragic stories like Naruto or Sasuke. 

Kishi being a troller, used this opportunity to create a piss poor sob story for Sarada by making Sasuke as an absentee father and an unloving husband.

He created a sad story for Sarada and he gets to shit on SS ship. Two birds, One stone!!!! 

Now, Sasuke being an unloving husband is OOC ? Nope. He was never a marriage material in the first place. So he is perfectly in-character.

Sasuke being an absentee father is OOC? No and Yes. No, because it’s the effect of the cause I mentioned above. Yes, because unlike Naruto, Sasuke once had a father. He can try to reach her out now and often. but he prefers not to do instead he cares more about Boruto. LOL.

Sasuke being not family oriented is OOC? Nope. He is a goal oriented person. His goal is same as Naruto’s dream. He will go to any extent to fulfill it, even at the expense of his family’s happiness. Because that’s what he learnt from Itachi. What Itachi taught him was, even at the expense of his own happiness and Sasuke’s trauma, he preferred Konoha and Shinobi World’s peace. That’s what Sasuke is doing now. 

Naruto works way more than any of his predecessors and sleeps in the office or couch so as not to disturb Hinata, when Hinata is specifically designed to accommodate anything that Naruto might require.

As for Naruto, 

I think it’s very funny. And I guess, I know why.

Just like Sasuke, Naruto is also a goal oriented person. 

Remember, in that Boruto movie, Sasuke knocks Naruto’s door at the midnight?

Imagine if Naruto opened the door. 

Sasuke will be like, ‘Alright mothafucka!!! I wanted to die in the VoTE itself. You wanted me in your dream world. Am working my ass off for your stupid dreams and trying to reach you without even meeting my own family. And yet here you are, sleeping well and sound. Am just gonna Chidori you!!!’ LOL.

I think you get my point. 

If you make Sasuke to be an hardworker, then Naruto must work even hard to fulfill his dream. So you possibly can’t have Naruto playing duet with Himata or whatever trash. 

So kishi pulled his Two birds, One Stone for NH here!!!

In short, Kishi gets to make his New generation shine through this pathetic sob stories and at the same time, kept his favorite characters without going OOC. 

So, it’s a polite way of Kishi showing middlefinger to SS and NH for making him do this. He is saying, ‘Alright folks, you wanted this all along. But this is what you will get!!!’.

Just makes me wonder how Kishi will finally conclude SNS, because their bond still shows clearly in Boruto. Do you think he will kill them any time soon?

I think about this all the time. How will they end?? How will they die??

Now, don’t think I am some sadist for wanting them to die. I am just being practical and honest here. This is a new generation series. Of course, at some point, Naruto and Sasuke has to die for the sake of character development. And I will be happy if they die because I don’t like their miserable portrayal in Boruto at all. 

Naruto series has a pattern when it comes to death portrayal. Meaningful characters (except Neji) always die protecting someone/something they cherish. Jiraiya died for Naruto, Yahiko died for Konan & Nagato, Itachi died for Sasuke & Konoha, Haku died for Zabuza, Obito (younger) died for Kakashi & Rin and so on.

Ever since Naruto became Hokage, his death is pretty much plastered on his head. He will die protecting Konoha just like all the Hokages from First to Fourth who sacrificed their life for Konoha. 

But Sasuke??? 

I am going to say he will die protecting Naruto or the village. But for Naruto mostly. Either way, Sasuke will die first. 

Dying for Naruto, the reasons are crystal clear. He already died protecting Naruto once in the Zabuza arc. He will never hesitate to do it again. Which was evident from the way he told Naruto in the Boruto movie while giving his Susanoo, ‘If they capture the real you, then everything is gone’. Somewhere in Boruto Manga chapter 38 (I don’t remember properly), Sasuke was yelling at Naruto, ‘If you are gone, it’s pretty hopeless’ and was praying ‘Naruto, don’t you die’. 

So it’s pretty much Sasuke saying to Naruto, ‘I’ll protect you, You protect everyone’

But why the village?? Why will Sasuke die for Konoha which caused him so much pain?? I know anti-konoha stans wont like this, but that’s the reality.

It seems many Sasuke fans never paid attention to his character. After hearing the story from all the Hokages, Sasuke said, ‘I will not let Itachi’s life and this village into nothing’. He really meant it. Because for Sasuke, Itachi was more precious. Itachi died saying, ‘I’ll have protected my village as Uchiha Itachi of Konoha once again. I have no more regrets’. Sasuke wanted to respect his brother’s wish finally and that’s why he openly claimed in the battlefield, ‘I am going to protect Konoha and become it’s Hokage’. Sasuke’s another precious person is Naruto. He is the Hokage now. 

Don’t you think Sasuke will die protecting something Itachi and Naruto values so much??

He even claimed it openly in Boruto Manga. ‘I would die anytime for Konoha, as has your dad (Naruto)’

Sasuke even said to Boruto, “I will stop you even if I have to kill you”. And do you think Sasuke is just pouring out some empty words??? Sasuke will not let Boruto to turn into an Otsutsuki monster and destroy the village.

Like I said, Sasuke will go out first. And eventually Naruto will follow him. Or they both die protecting the village together. I don’t see them dying for their wives or children. Because, their relationship with their family is not too strong and their ambitions are far beyond their own families.

Maybe for this reason, Kishi is trolling NH and SS in Boruto. LOL.

Naruto’s bond with Sasuke was formed even before his birth, when Kushina asked the 3 month old Baby Sasuke to be friends with Naruto.

However, One thing is for sure. One will not live very long without the Other or Both will die together. That’s how their bond should end. 

[pterodactylterrace]

Guys Like You Chapter 8

Title: Guys Like You

Chapter: 8

Chapter Summary: It’s just 2.5K words of smut.

Rating: 18+

Warnings: Smut. That’s really all this chapter is.

{Prologue} {Chapter 1} {Chapter 2} {Chapter 3} {Chapter 4} {Chapter 5} {Chapter 6} {Chapter 7}

The tension between the two was almost tangible the next week and a half on set. One would catch the other staring and respond with a suggestive smile. They would stand just a little too close during breaks. Stolen glances and gentle touches ran rampant, both waiting for their next opportunity alone together.

Therein lies their greatest problem. Being alone together. You see, their lack of sealing the deal wasn't a matter of effort on both their parts. Henry had Faye come back a few days later, willing to forgo his early morning exercise if it meant spending the night doing 'cardio'. As it turned out, Briar was still terrified sleeping in a room by herself in the strange house. They had tried letting Kal stay with her, hoping to kill two birds with one stone and stop the canine's constant wines from the other side of the door. Using that technique, they made it just to Henry with his shirt off and his hand down the front of Faye's shorts before being interrupted again. This time both Kal and Briar were outside the door begging to be let in.

The look of desperate exasperation on his face was a memorable one. That night ended with Briar and Kal squeezed between them, but sleeping peacefully at least.

A few days after that had been their next attempt. Lesson learned, this one took place at Faye's home. Now Briar had her own room to stay in, so that should be one distraction eliminated. Kal had a full bowl of kibble and water set out in the kitchen and his bed was placed in the small living room between the couch and the coffee table. Unfortunately, Henry had just wrapped up a physically demanding day on set and ended up snoring on the couch with Briar sleeping on his chest by 7 pm. Faye had felt too bad for the poor guy to wake him up for more exertion, plus Briar would likely throw a fit if she were moved now. Instead, she threw a blanket over the pair and retreated to her room alone.

Tonight, though. Tonight was going to be the night. They had the location worked out for the fewest distractions, and it was even a short day for Henry. This was finally going to happen. The pair tried to be discreet throughout the day but ultimately found it hard to keep their hands to themselves. Well, Henry did anyway. It seemed he was sneaking handfuls of her bottom every chance he got. She would turn to grab something off the makeup table behind her and feel a hand on her backside while he casually pretended to just be trying to look around her to see what she was doing. He would slide behind often her and run his palm across her ass as he went, giving her a cheeky pinch as he went. Finally, when it was time for Faye to head home for the day, Henry wrapped her in a bear hug, one hand on her lower back, the other firmly gripping her backside as he lifted her up, whispering promises to get out of his costume quickly to meet up with her at her home.

Now, here they were, the door to the bedroom barely closed before Faye was pressing Henry back against it, her arms around his neck as she tugged him in for a longing kiss. His hands found her hips, pulling her closer, more than happy to return her affections. This was happening. This was really happening and Faye was wasting no time. She practically ripped Henry's shirt off in her haste, greedy little hands mapping over every inch of exposed skin she could reach while Henry worked on his belt.

Faye's shirt was next, her bra being hastily removed after. Henry shoved his jeans down his legs, kicking them from his feet and pulling Faye back in for another hungry kiss, large insatiable hands gripping her ass and lifting her up with ease, her legs automatically winding around his waist.

"Lock the door." Faye panted against his lips, her fingers sliding into his curls as she squeezed his waist tighter with her legs, trying to gain some friction against her heated core. Henry reached behind him, blindly grasping for the handle, finally finding it and turning the lock.

He carried her to the bed, gently laying her on the blankets, slowly moving back to take her in again. "I'm never going to get tired of seeing you like this." He breathed, his fingers ghosting down her sides and hooking in her leggings, dragging them and her underwear down her legs reverently, groaning softly when he saw his glistening prize.

"Condom." Faye instructed, crawling back to the pillows and rummaging through her side table drawer.

Henry chased her up the bed, attacking her side and hip with playful kisses and nips, pulling back when she handed him the foil-wrapped protection. "Fuck." Henry groaned, his face falling in distress when he looked at what was in his hand.

"What?" Faye asked, tilting her head questioningly.

"Do you... have anything else?" Henry asked, sitting back on his heels, turning hopeful eyes up to her.

"No... why, are you allergic?"

"No, it's not that. It's just... too small." Henry sighed, a faint flush coloring his cheekbones.

"Too small?" Faye asked skeptically, sitting herself up on her elbows. Typical excuse.

"I'll use it, it's not that big of a deal, I can get it on, but it's more likely to break," Henry explained, looking despondently at the packet in his hand. "Also... don't be offended if I don't finish. I swear, it's not that I don't find you insanely attractive, but these squeeze me really tightly and I can't feel much when I use them."

"Henry..." Faye started, giving him an unbelieving look.

"I am not trying to get out of using protection. I'm responsible, I promise! I got checked for everything at my last annual check-up and I'm clean. I'm just telling you what can happen."

"What exactly are you working with?" Faye asked, sitting up and hooking her fingers in the waistband of his underwear, Henry leaning back to allow better access as she quickly pulled them down, grunting softly when his erection thumped against his lower stomach. "Oh shit." Faye swore, her eyes going wide when she took him in. She'd had a feeling he was 'gifted' from the times she had felt him through his clothes, but she had no idea exactly how 'gifted' he was.

"Are you ok?" Henry questioned after a beat, shifting uncomfortably under her intense gaze.

"That's... fuck. Yeah, we're going to have to take this slow. That thing is huge. Jesus... is that your dick or a third leg?"

"I wasn't being a prick when I said it was too small." Henry chuckled nervously. "Are you on the pill?"

"No, I tried a few different ones when I was younger but I always had horrible side effects." Faye admitted, a curious hand sliding along his shaft pulling a deep content sigh from deep within his chest. She'd never been with an uncut man before.

"Fuck." Henry groaned, his hips twitching into her touch. "I could... shit, just like that." He gasped when her thumb gently slid back his foreskin, circling the hypersensitive spot just beneath the crown. "Fuck... " Henry trailed off, his eyes falling closed as he allowed himself to just feel.

"How good is your pull out game?" Faye questioned, her other hand gently cupping his balls, massaging them the best she could in her tiny palm.

"No misfires." Henry chuckled, hope sparking in his belly. "Not to kill the mood, but are you... like... fertile right now?" Henry asked, gesturing vaguely to her lower stomach.

"It's a crap shoot, honestly. Never been regular, I have no way of knowing."

"Fuck." Henry groaned.

"Not that I don't think you're a great guy, but I don't know if I'm willing to risk being a single mother of two." Faye mumbled softly, continuing to work him with her hand.

"I don't plan on going anywhere." Henry scoffed, pulling her closer to claim her lips. "But I won't do anything that makes you uncomfortable. How about you sit on my face and we take it from there?"

"I thought you were joking about that." Faye squeaked, her eyes going wide.

"No, I'd love to have that pretty pussy riding my jaw." Henry whispered against her lips, slowly trailing down to her neck with playful kisses. "Have you screaming my name from on top of me." A gentle nip at the junction of her neck, causing her to gasp. "Using that amazing ass to pull you even closer." He descended lower, teasing her nipple with his lips, his tongue darting out to flick against it. "What do you say, beautiful?"

"I... fuck... what about you?"

"Worry about that later." Henry dismissed, rolling onto his back next to her, his greedy hands dragging her thigh over him to straddle his chest. "Right now, I'm hungry."

"Shit." Faye gasped as his hands gripped her ass, dragging her up to hover over his mouth, being met almost instantly by his impatient mouth on her heated core. He licked slow, deliberate stripes through her glistening folds, catching every drop of arousal he could before he began his assault on her sensitive bundle of nerves. The gasps and moans falling freely from her mouth spurred him on. He pulled her even closer with his hands on her ass, wrapping his lips around her clit and sucking it desperately.

Faye was vaguely aware of one of his hands leaving her backside, but only became fully aware of what it was doing through her lust filled haze when she felt a long thick finger slowly pressing inside of her, curling at just the right moment to press against the most sensitive spot inside of her. "Fuck! Henry!" Faye groaned, torn between chasing his mouth or pushing back against his invading finger as he moved it in small teasing wiggles inside of her, just enough to drive her insane with need.

His eyes snapped up to her face when she called his name, a cocky smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth as he added a second finger, massaging her inner wall with more purpose. All it took was one firm lick to her clit and a deliberate curl of his fingers for her to come undone, gushing onto his hand and jaw as she panted his name desperately, holding onto the headboard for dear life as she rode out her orgasm.

Henry gently slipped his fingers out, watching her closely as she moved to sit beside him instead, pushing her sweaty strands from her face as she tried to catch her breath. He absently sucked on his still wet fingers as he watched her, waiting to see what her next move would be. Would she be too tired to continue? Would she go back to teasing his shaft until he lost his mind? Might she possibly return the favor?

His ponderings were drawn to an abrupt close when Faye had finally caught her breath. Before he realized what she was doing she was laying between his legs, her lips teasing the head of his cock as her hands rubbed along his inner thighs. Her tongue followed the thick vein on the underside from the base to the tip before taking him into her mouth. She started out slow and modest, his thick shaft already stretching her lips; her jaw had to open impossibly wide to prevent scraping him with her teeth.

Slowly, she sank deeper and deeper, her tongue flicking along the underside, her hands busying themselves with pumping his shaft and cupping his heavy sack. Her cheeks hollowed out as she pulled back, releasing him with a lewd pop. Her hands kept working him as she stared up at him, content to watch him squirm for the moment.

"I've never done this with an uncut guy before." Faye admitted innocently, her eyes falling to his cock as her hand easily slid up and down. "This is certainly easier to do, but you need to tell me what you like."

"You can just... push it back and do what you'd normally do." Henry explained through his panting, his hips jerking up desperately into her touch. It had been so long since he'd had anything other than his fist to get him off, and he could tell he wasn't going to last very long tonight.

"So, just push it back?" Faye repeated, her tiny, agile fingers slowly pushing his foreskin back, watching his face for any sign of discomfort. How far back? Just enough to get it out of the way? All she knew for sure is she didn't want to be rough and end up hurting him, especially in such a sensitive area.

"That's good. You're ok." Henry praised, his fingers sliding through her hair, urging her closer to his twitching cock.

Faye licked along the head, growing more confident at his increasing moans. He was certainly vocal. She took him back into her mouth, her tongue focusing on the tip as her hand worked his shaft again. His hips continued twitching up into her mouth, occasionally pushing too far and causing her to gag. She took him as deep as she could, tears falling from her eyes as she fought her gag reflex. She slowly pulled back, sucking hard as she went, her hand pumping him faster, her head bobbing along with the rhythm.

"Shit." Henry hissed, his head falling back against the pillows, his hands gripping her hair tighter. "Fuck, Faye. I'm close." He warned, his hips twisting beneath her as he fought the urge to thrust up into her warm mouth. "I don't... I don't care where but if you don't want it in your mouth, you need to move." He gasped, the pressure building at the base of his spine until it grew too much to handle. He let go with a loud roar that sounded vaguely like her name, pumping himself up into her mouth with each wave of his orgasm until he was left a blissed-out, sated mess beneath her.

"Sorry... Didn't know if you swallowed." Henry apologized, his hands falling from her hair to cup her jaw.

"Not a problem if I know it's coming." Faye assured, crawling back up the bed to curl into his side.

"Tomorrow, I am going to the nearest pharmacy and buying out their entire stock of condoms." Henry determined, kissing the top of her head.

"Just the XL ones, or are you going to take everything they have?" Faye teased.

"I'm taking everything. If the universe keeps getting between us having sex, no one else should be able to do it either." Henry pouted.

"Pass them out to all your buddies. Be like their Fairy Rubber Mother. Make sure they know they don't fit your massive cock when you do it too." Faye giggled, kissing his chest gently.

"Damn right. If I have to carry this monster around all day, everyone should have to know about it." Henry chuckled around a yawn.

"Get some sleep, Bear. We have to be in early tomorrow."

[batgurl1989]

A Wolf In Toussaint Chapter One

Summary: You(nin) wakes up, finding that things at the Vegelbud wedding didn’t go according to plan, but questions quickly rise about what exactly happened.

Word Count: 2558

Warnings: Spoilers for Witcher 3 DLC

A/N: Sorry this is a little longer than normal. It hasn’t been beta-ed, so all the mistakes are my own. This is the new series in the Witcher series I am writing. It follows We Meet Again and Running With The Wolf. If you want to be added to the taglist, let me know :)

Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five

Taglist: @rmtndew​ @henrynerdfan​ @cynic-spirit​ @princesssterek​ @djinny-djin-djin​ @seanh-boredom​

Chapter One

Pain. That’s the first thing you noticed when you started to come to. Pain in your wrists that were lashed together behind your back by rope that was much too tight. Pain throbbing in your head where the hilt of the dagger had hit you, knocking you out when you put up too much of a fight. The last thing you remember was trying to call on your magic to get away from the man with the dagger pressed to your throat as Geralt came back around the corner of the hedge, alerted by your struggles.

That’s when your captor had opened a portal. You remember feeling the power vacuum form behind you as it yawned wide open. Geralt didn’t reach you in time as the man with his arms around you stepped through, closing the portal quickly behind him. A deepening fury flared through Geralt’s golden eyes as the last shred of portal closed.

Slitting your eyes open, you didn’t dare lift your head in case you weren’t alone. Or at least that’s what you tried to tell yourself. The pounding headache was certainly making any movement harder. The room was dimly lit, and you realized that the rocking you felt wasn’t because of the swimming fog in your head. You were on a boat. Now that you knew, the creaking and groaning of the timber made more sense. A lamp swung on a post nearby, causing the fire inside to flicker intensely which didn’t work well with your headache.

The good news was you were alone. The bad news was that you seemed to be in the brig, tied to a post in the middle of the cell. The stench wafting from the corner caused your stomach to churn unfavourably, and you fought hard to keep the contents down. Breathing through your mouth, you lifted your head to look around as best you could from your vantage point.

“Ah, you awaken.” A voice to your left drew your attention. Fighting off another wave of nausea at the pain in your head, you turned to investigate the darkened cell next to yours. An Ofieri slave sat, tied similarly to you to the post in the middle of the cell, but unlike you, he seemed to be fairing better. “I was wondering how long it would be.”

“How long have I been out?” You didn’t want to think about how many days had passed. Based on how cramped your muscles felt, and how raw your wrists seemed to be, it had been at least a couple of days. You ached to rub your head, wanting to ease at least some of the pain bouncing around in your skull.

“It has been 5 days. I didn’t think you would ever wake up.” The man informed you, the last part of what he said concerning you the most. He must have seen the question form on your face, because he continued. “You were bleeding a lot from your head. Eventually the guard brought you the ship’s healer. It seems that they want to keep you alive.”

“Though not comfortable.” You quip, testing your bonds, wincing at the pain that shoots up your arms from your open wounds from the ropes.

“Where would the fun be in that?” The man laughed. You squinted into the darkness, trying to see him better. The lamp light didn’t seem to touch his cell as much as yours, and you could only see a vague outline of his face. If it wasn’t for his legs sticking out into the pool of light, you would have been convinced that you were talking to yourself.

“Why are they keeping you here?” You ask, groaning as you shift, stretching your stiff legs out to sit in a similar fashion to your new companion. You were careful not to move your arms too much, not wanting to cause further damage to your wrists.

“I stole from the King.” Your ears perked up at the mention of a king. He didn’t specify which one, but not many used that title lightly. And if he was Ofieri, perhaps it was a hint at what was in store for you.

“Which king would that be?” You hesitated before asking, not wanting to seem too eager. In the back of your mind, you couldn’t fight off the suspicion that this was a trap to get more information out of you.

“The King of Beggars.” The man offered as though it was obvious.

It was as though all the air was sucked from your lungs. A man you had trusted on more than a few occasions had effectively kidnapped you after screwing over a mission he had set you and Geralt on the path to. Something wasn’t adding up for you, but your head was still foggy with pain, and you felt like you couldn’t see all the pieces laid out in front of you. There was some else at work here, but it lay just outside of what you could see.

“Do you happen to know where we are heading?” Still trying to piece together what you knew already with all sorts of possibilities, you decided it was best to gather as much information as you could from someone who might be willing to provide answers. It was unlikely you would have another opportunity like this one.

“Until you were brought in, I assumed I was being taken back to Ofir to face the crimes I committed there.” The man shrugged as best he could. “Now it is anyone’s guess.”

Ofir. That was beyond the sea. Without the help from a Sorceress, Geralt would never find you. Unless he was willing to take down one of the crime bosses of Novigrad to get answers. And that was if that was where you were even heading. As your fellow captive pointed out, neither of you could really know where you were heading. You needed to convince a guard to give you the answers, but it wasn’t like you could enchant him to do it.

The fog in your head suddenly cleared. Magic. The fools had tied you up with rope. There wasn’t a single piece of Dimeritium on you. Nothing was binding your magic. They didn’t know who or what you were. They simply thought you were important to the Witcher and to the King of Beggars, but the latter hadn’t offered up any information about you to your captors before they got their hands on you. You held in the laughter that threatened to bubble up as relief flooded you.

“What did you steal?” You weren’t about to let a known criminal walk free. Not unless the punishment outweighed the crime. “What crimes are you facing back in Ofir?”

“Horse theft.” The man stated simply. You had to assume that he had committed that crime in both Velen and in Ofir. In Ofir, where they valued horses above most else, that was a serious crime. The punishment was death. In Velen, they punished it with death, but horses were viewed more as property than as a way of life. Velen had some harsh laws involving property.

“I’m going to get us out of here, but I suggest you find somewhere other than Novigrad and Velen to make a home for yourself. The King won’t let you live if he sees you again.” You smiled at him, already drawing on the wealth of power from the water surrounding the ship you were housed in. The look of awe that spread across the man’s face was worth the nosebleed this was probably going to cost you. “Unfortunately, I can’t promise where we will land, but it will be on land and out of captivity.”

Your portalling wasn’t as precise as Yennefer’s, and you were vastly out of practice. Just yet another thing that you needed to work on, stretch that metaphorical muscle. First things first though, you had to make your bonds disappear. Not the easiest task as there was always the risk of burning the person. At this point, you were fairly certain you wouldn’t feel it if you burned yourself, but you didn’t want to burn your companion.

“This may sting.” You offered a mild warning as you pulled the magic together to create your spell. You winced as your hands relaxed apart, the tension leaving your shoulders. You were pleased to see the man in the cell next to you not show any pain as the spell displaced the ropes binding his hands.

You jumped to your feet, adrenaline taking over as you felt the vacuum of a portal you weren’t creating. You watched warily as a hole was ripped, spinning, in the space in front of your cell. Then you felt it. The signature of the Sorceress creating the portal. Every spell left a signature, but not all signatures could be traced. Only the strongest among the Lodge could do that. But that didn’t mean you couldn’t recognize it.

You immediately set to work on melting down the hinges of your cell door. It would be one last thing you needed to worry about once the portal was fully formed. There was no way the crew on the ship didn’t feel the power amassing below deck in the brig. You split your power between your door and your neighbour’s, knowing that as soon as the iron doors fell, the crew would definitely know something was going on with the prisoners.

“Younin!” Geralt rushed through the portal just as the doors fell. He pulled you to him in a tight hug, relief flooding both of you now that you were in each other’s arms again.

“We have to move. Now.” Your voice dripped with urgency as you pulled out of the all too brief hug, wishing you could do more than that. There was no time though.

“Well, if you hadn’t created such a cacophony of noise, we could have just slipped you back out.” The voice of the signature floated through the portal. You stiffened, hoping you could have avoided this encounter a little longer.

“Thank you, Yenn.” Your voice was tight as you turn to your fellow Sorceress. A slither of jealousy snaked around your spine, settling in your gut. You hated that Geralt had to turn to his old lover, even though you knew she was basically the only one who could do what he needed.

Reaching for your cell mate, you pulled him through the portal as you heard shouting and boots on the stairs leading into the brig. Geralt drew his sword but followed behind you through the portal. Yennefer quickly slammed the portal shut before anyone could follow you. As much as you didn’t like it, you knew you could never have pulled off the portal as smoothly as Yennefer did.

The danger had passed for now. There was still the issue of the King of Beggars botching the mission on purpose, but you were safe. That seemed to be all that mattered to the otherwise stoic Witcher. Geralt pulled you in for a fierce kiss, not caring about the company you were in. You clung to his armour, wishing it wasn’t in your way. After the close call you just had, you needed to feel alive, and the only way that was going to happen was if you were alone and there was nothing between you. You needed to feel his body stretched out above yours, skin to skin.

“I am sorry to interrupt, but where are we?” The Ofieri interjected. Pulling away from Geralt, making sure to check your anger at having been interrupted, you turned to look at your surroundings.

“Good question. Yennefer?” You frowned when you didn’t recognize the room you were in. A quick glance out the window didn’t offer you an answer either. Turning to the other Sorceress, you caught the look of displeasure that flitted across her face at realizing how deeply Geralt felt for you.

“Geralt wanted me to bring you to his house in Toussaint in case you were injured.” Yennefer offered, her face becoming a perfected mask of indifference. She examined her nails as though trying to prove how little interest she had in your feelings for the Witcher who once warmed her bed.

“You have a house in Toussaint?” You ignored Yenn’s antics, looking up at Geralt. The land filled with Knights-errant seemed like the last place Geralt would want to settle down.

“It was a reward for helping the Duchess. And with Kaer Morhen in ruin, it seemed as good as any place to set some roots.” Geralt guided you closer to the window with a hand on your lower back. You smiled up at him, leaning into his hold as you took in the sun dappled scene beyond the glass.  

“Come, Ofieri, I think there is food in the kitchen for us.” Yennefer couldn’t stomach anymore of seeing you two together and fled the room. The man who you realized you still didn’t know his name followed quickly after her, leaving you and the Witcher alone.

“How are you really?” Geralt turned you with his hands on your shoulders. His gold eyes flicked over your body, assessing all your injuries.

He guided you to the bed, squatting in front of you when you sat down. He carefully lifted your hands up when he noticed how bad your wrists were. At the slight movement, however, the wounds opened again and began bleeding freely. You winced as sharp pain travelled up your arms again. Geralt caught the look on your face, cupping your cheek as he looked deep into your eyes. He didn’t have to say anything, you could see the concern and worry darkening his hypnotic cat eyes. His hand travelled to the back of your head, wanting to draw you to him for a kiss, but he felt the congealed blood in your hair.

“How is your head?” He asked quietly, sure your headache was pounding especially after using magic to free yourself. As uncomfortable as Yennefer’s presence was making you, you had to admit you didn’t think you could have pulled off the portal in your condition.

“It hurts.” You admitted unnecessarily. You knew he understood what a head injury felt like. One of the perks of his job. You leaned into his hand when he cupped your cheek again. “For now, I just think I need rest. I can work on healing later.”

Geralt nodded, helping you get into the decadently decorated bed. Even through your pain, you had to almost laugh at how out of place this bed seemed in Geralt’s life. The rich colours and immense comfort were a far cry from the places the Path normally took him. As your head hit the down filled pillow, all the questions you had been asking yourself came flooding back to you.

“Sleep.” Geralt gently said, his hand making the motion you had come to recognize as the Axii sign. Your questions were probably written all over your face, and he was compelling you to sleep instead of laying awake as your mind ran wild.

Your eyes slid closed shortly after. The last thing you remember is the feeling of Geralt’s warm callused hand on your forehead, followed by the soft press of his lips. And then sleep overtook you.

[five-rivers]

Long Night in the Valley chapter 5

Toshinori found himself thinking about his brief and extremely ill-advised time as a quirkless vigilante.  He had a sinking suspicion that it because of his uninvited mental guests, but he couldn’t exactly do anything about that.  Between the two of them, Izuku had always been better at the mental portion of their quirk.  

He finished washing the bleach out of Izuku’s hair and couldn’t help but wonder if Izuku had ever contemplated going down that path. It had been cruel, and knowing what he did now, he would never repeat it, but his speech to Izuku on that rooftop had been intended to keep him from making the same mistakes Toshinori had in his youth.  

If Nana hadn’t picked him up…  he shuddered to think what would have become of him.  He’d certainly been in over his head, hitting far above his weight class.  

Although, to be honest, they weren’t in a good position right now, either.  

“I’m sorry,” said Izuku, softly.  

“It isn’t your fault,” said Toshinori.  

“But I couldn’t make him leave.  And now he’s going after your secrets.”

“My boy, they sent a highly skilled infiltrator into your mind.”  Toshinori was not entirely sure how he knew this, but it felt correct.  “You don’t have the training to combat that.  What you have done is remarkable.”  He toweled off Izuku’s hair.  The damp and the product had conspired to make it less fluffy than usual.  “The last you told me, you couldn’t even manifest fully in that place.”

“I tried to distract them,” said Izuku, miserably. “It didn’t work.  It—He’s still there.”

“It’s alright, it’s alright,” said Toshinori.  “Other than One for All, I don’t have any secrets worth all these tears.”  It might be annoying if they found out about all the illegal stuff he’d done over the years, but most of it would be nigh-impossible to prove.  “Let’s get you into that suit.”

“Right,” said Izuku, peeling out of his clothes.  “Why a suit, though?”

“It’s something you’d never choose to wear and relatively anonymous,” said Toshinori.  He started to put on his own coat, checking that all the hidden pouches were filled. To stay true to his disguise, Izuku was only carrying a messenger bag, and they would need the supplies.  

“How do I look?” asked Izuku.  The first thing Toshinori noticed was that he hadn’t bothered with the tie, but Toshinori had planned to take care of that from the beginning.  

The second thing—

Toshinori did not blanch.  

Of course, that’s what he looks like, whispered seven or so voices.  Knew from the beginning.  Have to read the DNA to rewrite it.  Can’t give this to just anyone.

Yes.  Of course.

“You look wonderful,” said Toshinori, reaching for the tie.  “And also unrecognizable.”

“Well, that’s the point, right?” asked Izuku, running a hand through his hair.  “So… How are we going to do this?”

Toshinori made a face.  He wasn’t terribly good at this part.  There was a reason he’d relied so heavily on Sir Nighteye once upon a time.

“I… could come up with a plan,” proposed Izuku.  “Tell me how Trace’s quirk works.”

.

The fight reached the other side of the tunnel, and spilled out into bright, yellow sunlight.  Midoriya had been fighting Iida up until a moment ago, but upon exiting the tunnel he had run off.  After stabbing Suzuki in the eye with a pencil.  

Meanwhile, All Might, Teenage Menace special edition, was holding his own against them.  

One thing Aizawa didn’t understand, though, was why All Might wasn’t using his quirk.  

Thankfully, after leaving the tunnel, the boy began to falter, and then ran off after Midoriya.  Aizawa wasn’t interested in pursuing either of them.  Were there questions he wanted answered?  Yes.  Did he want them answered at the cost of invading his student’s privacy and breaking his trust?  No.  

In the meantime, he did have to see if the idiot needed medical care.  That was, unfortunately, part of his job.  

“Want help with that?” he asked.  

“No,” said Suzuki, pulling the pencil out.  In less than a second, his eye was fine.  “That hurt,” he complained.  

A small part of Aizawa mourned the fact that breaking Suzuki’s legs would not be enough to stop him.  A small, but very present part.  He pushed it away.  Thinking on might-have-beens was illogical.  

“Sensei!” called Uraraka.  “I think we’re in America.  All the signs are in English!”  She pointed.

The signs were, in fact, in English.  Considering how much time All Might had spent in America, it wasn’t terribly surprising that Midoriya would construct such a place for him in his mind.  

… Although, he had to wonder why Midoriya’s mind had a teenage vigilante All Might running around in it.  Because if he were Midoriya in this situation, and he could pick any All Might, he’d pick top-of-his-game natural disaster All Might, so, this had to be an All Might that Midoriya just.  Had.  For some reason.  

“This proves it,” said Todoroki.

“Proves what?” asked Aizawa.  

“That Midoriya is All Might’s secret love child.”

Iida sighed, heavily, leaving off prodding his formerly impaled shoulder.  

“Think about it!” said Todoroki, as emotive as Aizawa had ever seen him.  “Who else would All Might tell about his dark past?”

Regrettably, he had a point.  

“Add that to the quirk, and the smile, and how they meet up for lunch at least once a week—”

“That is literally the dumbest thing I have ever heard,” said Suzuki.  “All Might is a natural-born hero.  A pillar of society!”

“Yes?” said Todoroki, squinting at Suzuki as if daring him to say something that made sense.  

“He isn’t going to have a secret love child.”

Regrettably, he also had a point.  

“Much less one like Midoriya Izuku.”

Okay, the point was gone.  

“In any case, black tentacles are not at all like All Might’s general enhancer.”

“It is like his mother’s, though,” said Todoroki, “and even though I keep saying ‘secret love child,’ my current theory is that Midoriya-san and All Might are, in fact, married, but they had to do it secretly, so that All Might’s enemies wouldn’t find them.”  

“Todoroki, please, you can’t just spread baseless rumors like that about your classmates!” said Iida, chopping at the air.  “Much less your classmate’s families!”

Todoroki looked hurt.  “But I have evidence!”

Aizawa should probably put a stop to this, but he kind of wanted to see where it was going, and there was no way this was true.  At all.  

If Midoriya was All Might’s kid, he would never shut up about it.  All Might, that was.  Midoriya was, evidently, capable of keeping secrets.  

(On the other hand, Aizawa didn’t have a better theory for their obvious close bond.)

“What evidence?” asked Iida, clearly intrigued despite himself.

“Midoriya-san is amazing.”  Todoroki’s eyes sparkled like he was in a manga.  

Aizawa sighed, he should have known the ‘evidence’ would—

Wait.  

“Where’s Uraraka?”

.

Uraraka really should have been paying more attention. Especially after all the situational awareness classes Aizawa-sensei had given them.  

Izuku didn’t blame her.  This was a distracting situation, and he rather suspected being asleep and ‘dreaming’ was affecting their judgement.  

Still.  It was almost too easy to pull her to the side and through a door into another part of the dreamscape.  

But after that, she shook off his grip and readied a fighting stance.  

“I don’t want to fight,” he whispered, making a quelling motion.

Uraraka looked like she wanted to believe him but frowned. “Sorry, but I kind of find that hard to believe after you stabbed Iida.  I mean, I know you’re under the effects of a quirk and all, but you’re still under the effects of a quirk.”  Despite her words, she matched his volume.  

“I know, I know,” said Izuku.  “It looks bad, but…”  He wrung his fingers together and adjusted the sleeves of his uniform.  “There’s something you guys need to know about what’s going on, and you were easiest to grab.  Can I explain?  I’m not going to fight you guys anymore.  Not like- Not like I was.”

Uraraka sighed and relaxed her shoulders, just slightly. “Alright, Deku, I—” she faltered. “Midoriya.”

“You can still call me Deku,” said Izuku.  “I mean, it is my hero name.”

“Yes, but… they used it to hurt you, didn’t they?”

Izuku shrugged.  This wasn’t the conversation he wanted to be having.  “If—I guess, if you want, you can call me Izuku.  It would feel weird for you to go to calling me Midoriya.”

Uraraka blinked.  “Are you sure?”

“Yes?”

“Then you have to call me Ochako!”

Izuku blushed.  “Okay,” he said, in a tiny voice.  He coughed.  “So. Um.  Imagine, imagine you’re in a room.”  He gestured at the facsimile of the American diner.  “You’re standing in the middle.”

Ura—Ochako nodded.  “Sure,” she said.  

“Right.  So, you can’t see all the walls at once, no matter how you turn.  Unless, like, you have some kind of vision-related quirk, or a quirk like Shoji’s I guess.”  Izuku shook his head, putting aside that train of thought for the moment.  “Does that make sense, so far?”

“Yes,” said Ochako, “but I don’t see what it has to do with… this.”  She spread her hands in front of her.  

“Well, um.  It’s what was going on back there,” he gestured vaguely towards where they’d come from.  “From the beach until the tunnel.  You were in my head.  Kind of… inside my personality, I guess?  So, you couldn’t see the whole thing at once.  Just the walls from the inside.  Each, um, each one of me?  Each one of me was like a different wall.  You couldn’t see the whole shape.  They were incomplete.”

“Okay,” said Ochako.  “But that should still be what’s happening, then, right?  We’re still in your head.”

“Yeah, that’s why I needed to talk to you.  You aren’t.  You’re…  This me, the me you’re talking to, right now, I’m complete, because you’re seeing me from outside, now.  Well, mostly complete.  Like, you can’t see the other side of the room from the outside…  Oh, no, All Might is right, I’m terrible at metaphors.”  He buried his face in his hands.  

“It’s fine,” said Ochako.  “But, um.  You’re saying we’re in someone else’s head?”

“Sort of.  Just… not my dreamscape.  Mindscape? It’s-It’s complicated.”  He lifted his head.  

“D—Izuku-kun, is this All Might’s mind?”

It was going to be pretty obvious once everyone woke up, so Izuku nodded.

“Why?” asked Ochako.  “How?”

“I can’t explain everything right now.  It’s too much, and I don’t know if the commission has someone listening with a telepathy quirk from the outside.  I know they’re not using it on me, because I’m awake, but—”

“What?  You’re awake?”

“Sort of, sort of.  It’s a side effect of what’s going on here.  I woke up when Suzuki-san shot me.  And I’m sort of on the run.  It’s really, really, not something I can give details about, though, because, you know. Listening.”

Ochako took a deep breath.  “So, what did you want to tell me?”

“Well, all of that, but also, we need to coordinate.  It would be best if we could get Suzuki-san to stay in one place, but I don’t think that’s going to happen.”

“We were trying to do that before.”

“I kind of thought so,” said Izuku.  “The problem is, if you’re moving around, you’re going to run into All Might like you ran into me back in my dreamscape.  If Suzuki-san’s quirk works the way I think it does, and he keeps using it on me, that’s not a problem at this point.  But if he starts using it on T—on All Might, that’s different.”

“You know what his quirk is?” asked Ochako, raising her eyebrows.

“I think he can make people think of particular topics,” said Izuku.  “Like secrets and stuff.  Which is why him realizing he’s in All Might’s mind would be bad.”

Ochako nodded and perched on the edge of one of the tables. “All Might was number one for so long,” she said, “I’d be surprised if he didn’t know a whole bunch of different classified things.  Should we try to go back?”

“… I’d say yes, but I need my brain power for escaping, not rendering traumatic moments from my childhood, and I know a lot of different classified things.  Some of which are, uh.  Significantly more recent.  Plus, I’m not sure All Might will let you go back.”

“Oh,” said Ochako, tilting her head.  “Don’t take this the wrong way, but there isn’t any truth behind Todoroki’s secret love child theory, is there?”

“Absolutely not,” said Izuku.  

“Okay.   I’m guessing you have a plan?”

“More like a distraction,” said Izuku.  “I don’t know how well this will work, but…”

.

“You know,” said Izuku as he shouldered his bag, both fascinated and horrified, “with your head shaved and the face mask bit, you kind of look like, you know.”

“Ah,” said Toshinori, uncertain how to react to realizing that he had dressed both himself and his successor as their worst enemy.  “I suppose,” he said.  “The coat is very different, though.”

“Yes.  It is.”

“Speaking of which,” said Toshinori, forcibly changing the topic, “remember to take the tie off if you get into a fight.  It’s too easy to grab on to.”

Izuku nodded, partially distracted by all the conversations happening in his head.  Then he blinked.  

“Vigilantism?”

Toshinori shrugged sheepishly.  “Did you ever consider it?”

All Izuku had ever wanted to do was help people.  Save people.  Heroics had been the best option.  For a while, the only option.  In theory, a person could get into heroics on merit and skill.  Everything else…  Anything like a doctor or a police officer or a lawyer…  It would have been impossible for a quirkless person.  Even finding housing could be difficult for the quirkless, because most landlords made people disclose their quirks, to ‘prevent accidents from bad quirk interactions.’

Toshinori wrapped an arm around Izuku’s shoulder.  For a moment, Izuku had forgotten he’d been listening in.  For a moment, he’d forgotten how bitter he could be about that particular

“Not then,” he said.  He’d known that he’d never survive without training he couldn’t get except at a hero school like UA.  “But now?”

“Heh.  We’ll make quite the duo, won’t we, my boy?”  

They needed to leave.  Before Trace got too close.  They both had their directions, but it didn’t really matter if they remembered them clearly or not.  Not when they could hear and feel each other, and they had so much help.  

They exited the hideout, climbed up through the storm drains, navigated through the building above them, walked a block together, and split up without another word.

Trace’s quirk could tell where a person had been.  She wasn’t as good at determining when they had been there.  Any trails left within two hours of each other looked more or less the same, according to her registration with the hero commission.  According to an interview Izuku had seen her give once, in the aftermath of a kidnapping, after ten, the trail disappeared entirely, and she needed to have the trail to follow it.  

If Izuku and Toshinori looped over their trails often enough, she wouldn’t be able to tell which trail was which.  With luck and planning, they could lead her in maze-like loops, break their trail up with buses and jumps between buildings, and get a head start on her. A head start that they could use to outdistance her, because her tracking quirk took time to work.  

At least, that was what Izuku hoped would happen.  In reality, the commission records tended to be out of date, heroes rarely gave completely correct information about their quirks to the public, and even Izuku’s encyclopedic knowledge had limits.  After all, encyclopedias gave only short overviews of their subjects.  

But there had to be some relation between reality and record.

And if it didn’t work…  Izuku’s self-preservation skills was trash, but eight minds whirred behind his, more than ready to put theirs to work for him.  The consensus was to fight, and, in this state, they would operate by the consensus.  Nine of them together.  

Nine here, keeping them physically away from the commission. Nine inside, keeping their secrets safe. Nine keeping the doors strong and the vault clo—

He stumbled at the unexpected direction of his thoughts. His head throbbed.  

It would be much easier if they weren’t in his head anymore.

He hurried forward.  

.

Miles away, in the most secure prison in the country, the guards of the most dangerous villain in the worlds scrambled for answers.  They had sedated the man known as All for One to what was, frankly, a dangerous degree.  He hadn’t so much as twitched in hours, nor had he spoken, even before that.

His brain activity was elevated.  

Highly elevated.  

It had been for hours, and they had no idea why.  

.

All for One smiled at the vault door in front of him. It had been a long time since he’d seen it, but, nevertheless, his memory of it was pristine.  It was, after all, a place he revisited often in his thoughts.  

Wondering, wondering.

But this wasn’t then.  This wasn’t a result of him being lost in thought.  Oh, no.  This was something infinitely more interesting.  Infinitely more valuable.  

He ran his hand through his curly hair and hummed contemplatively.  Interesting, interesting indeed.  

He walked to the door an ran his fingers down the cold interior, the little scrapes and knicks catching at his fingertips.  Now, this, this was more detail than he had retained, but not, perhaps, more detail than, say, someone who had been imprisoned here for a long time would recall.  

A smile stretched out over his face, wide and sparkling and full of glee.  

This, he thought, would be quite amusing.  

He pulled back his hand and made a fist.  

“Knock knock, little brother.”

.

Izuku slowed to a stop in the middle of the sidewalk.

That.  

He blinked, hard.

That would be a problem.  

He started walking again, faster.  

.

Toshinori leaned against a grimy city wall, out of breath. The mask was thick and made it hard to breathe, especially with his singular lung.  

Of course, what had him gasping wasn’t anything physical, but the massive weight of dread that had just settled on his chest.  Was Izuku in trouble?  Did the commission get him?

No.  

Slowly, unerringly, he rotated until he faced Tartarus.

Ah.

Not again.

.

Izuku broke off mid-sentence and grabbed Ochako by the wrist as the restaurant vibrated.  

“What was that?” asked Ochako.  

“A problem,” said Izuku, staring off into the distance, as if he was seeing something completely different.  Well.  He could be, Ochako realized.  

“Something in the real world?  Wherever you are?”

“No,” said Izuku.  “Change of plans.  You guys really, really need to get out of here.”  He pulled her out the door onto the street.  The sky was rapidly darkening.  He seemed to realize he was still holding onto her, and blushed, dropping her wrist.  “S-sorry.”

“We don’t know how, though.  I thought that was why we were doing the distraction.”

“We don’t know how, but…”  Izuku bit his lower lip.  “Yeah, yeah, no, one might be able to do something.  But if they’re closer…  Can’t just wait.  Can we still wait?  What do you think?  What… That would work?  Maybe.  We can work with maybe.  Seven, that’s too far.   Okay, yeah. Yeah.”

“Izuku-kun?”

“Sorry!  Sorry. I think…  I think you might have to go forward after all.  The others have been here longer than I have.  They know more.”  He started running down the street.  “Come on!”

“Others?  What others?” asked Ochako, hurrying to catch up.

“The, um.  The others we’re connected to, me and, and All Might.”  He wasn’t looking at her as he ran.  “If you ask them—They’ll know more than me.  They’ve been doing this longer, and this is tangled in one’s quirk. One of them might have seen a quirk like this before, been in this position before.”

“But—”

“It’s just really dangerous for you to be here right now.”

“Why?”

Izuku stopped and bounced in place.  “Weakened mental immune system, basically.  Something else is trying to get in.  Can’t do both at the same time.”

A building behind him exploded into rubble.  He winced.  

“What’s going on?” asked Ochako.  

“Flashback,” said Izuku.  “Toshinori…”  He shook his head and pointed down a cross street.  “If you go this way, you’ll be able to meet back up with everyone.”

“What about the plan?”

Izuku shook his head.  “Just try to stay alive, for now.  This isn’t going to be fun.  I’m sorry, I have to go!”

Before Ochako could protest further, he was gone.  

[aconstantstateofbladerunner]

Complete Butterfly Outline

Howdy friends.  The following is the complete chapter by chapter outline for Butterfly.  Now that the fic is finished and some people want to see it, I figured there was no harm in sharing.  Maybe this will help some of you better your own outline process.  Note that not everything that appears here made it into the fic, and some things that did don’t appear in this outline.  Some events are also in different order due to me changing my mind during the actual writing.  Feel free to ask me questions about those discrepancies or anything else.  Please enjoy!

Butterfly

The first over-night trip off campus since the training camp is supposed to be a break from anxiety.  But between concerns of history repeating itself, a major research project, and a bleak introduction to chaos theory, Izuku has too much on his mind to properly enjoy the fresh air.  But those worries are a light breeze compared to the thunderstorm that accompanies what he finds on the outskirts of town.  Or rather, what finds him.

1. Chaos Theory -thankful -comic book assignments -sound of thunder -butterfly effect -field trip

2. Yakku -bus ride -small town hero work -interject about butterfly -Cheat-A demonstration -talk with all might

3. Small time -community engagement -reports of stolen food -first day tour and fun, photos with fans -heat lightning -second day early morning patrols -groups: Sero, Toruu, Deku with hero -different route than normal -bullies, can’t threaten with quirk, but has his body -investigate diner -dead bodies

4. Let’s Talk About Anything Else -deku falls back on a table -kitchen covered in blood and black feathers -body: slash across stomach and eyes, other exposed shoulder blades -three form a perimeter while hero investigates -backup arrives, kids dismissed -hug -might have gotten there sooner had they taken a different road -statements and debriefs -return to hotel, can’t eat -hang out in room, read to pass time -talk about comic projects -nightfall’s, others return -Momo makes plushies -animal jokes -can’t sleep

5. The First Rung of the Spiral -third day, more patrols -stolen food in the night -seminar “That was... definitely higher than in practice.”  “Oh good, it wasn’t just me.” -feels like a warm hug, full body feeling of when all might ruffles his hair -“this is mine.  This is me.” -izuku gets through but get sick afterwards from anxiety -secret lake, something in the distance, canceled -watahashi - cross bridge -hibiki - echo -takuya - open also -dead deer -sleep on bus by All might, anxiety subsides

6. Nothing is Okay -week passes -Tsuyu dreams of drowning, talks to Deku -anxiety returns with a vengeance -occasional intense back pain -counseling with hound dog, recommends something from home -pissed that they didn’t receive immediate grief counseling -speak with recovery girl about pain, nothing physically wrong -prescribes a sleep aid, anxiety meds left open -return to dorm to find his leftovers missing

7. Part of the Job -training: escort -dread and erased quirk -deku’s team loses fake civilian -takes it hard -stays later to talk to Aizawa -more complaints about missing food -Mineta brings thank you gift, gourmet popcorn -pain hasn’t stopped -return for movie night: Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths -brief talk with iida -if we were to meet ourselves, we wouldn’t recognize ourselves -“saying the same thing over and over isn’t exactly helping either.” -deku can’t sleep, returns to his own bed

8. Yakku’s Finest -small town investigation inconclusive, murderer remains at large but reports of stolen food have stopped -diner money left untouched but larder picked clean -blood set, attacked in the night -quirk discussion, vague, strained relationship, -teleported in from somewhere, teleported away -DNA testing to be done on feathers “Did you ever go to investigate the houses with stolen food?  When was the last instance reported?”  “Four days after the murder.”  “How far back can your quirk see?”  “One day.”  “How many days has it been?”

9. Dread -awake from pain -reading news updates -school forum rumors about stolen food

10. The Mind Killer -earthquake rescue training -keep notes on others to make up credit -dread not as bad -still has brace, sleepy and sick from concussion -pretends to be better -argument after almost throwing up -getting late -all might was never able to find his all star Superman trade reading online -picnic table with mirio, suneater, and eri -babysitters -talk about projects, mirio did shadow cat and suneater did animal man -brings up Superman’s suneater -all might approaches, chastises him for staring at a screen while he has a concussion, offers Superman trade instead -discuss the fall -what’s one more scar? -“why didn’t you tell me?” -“I don’t know” -“you could have been killed.” -dread tells him he only cares for one for all -phone call -mom going out of town -izuku lies -banging down the hall -getting closer -deku hides behind door -thing hesitates in his room, goes to door -wing claw and eye reveal -calls for help, thing vanishes -no evidence -“I felt it breathe on me.” -most don’t believe him

11. Ache -hospital -nothing wrong -can’t enjoy getting the brace off -another little scar -recoverygirl argues with nurse -all might arrives with stuff -tells izuku to call his mom -confesses to illness -schedule specialist appointment -nothing on cameras -explain Midoriyas condition -compare notes with Jakku -all might calls Gran Torino about izuku’s symptoms -aoyama thinks about Midoriya during earthquake simulation -others ask about the seizure but he doesn’t have answers -put together a card and nice dinner to welcome him back -try to make food himself -update from Aizawa : Midoriya coming back, tired, don’t bother him -izuku breezes past everyone, uraraka follows -has an attack on the stairs -never happened before -retreats to room, leaving uraraka behind

12. From the Outside -bakugo dreams of the sludge villain -sees deku in the crowd, yelling sorry -wakes up, goes to bathroom -finds a black feather, thinks it’s a prank -realizes he would have done the same thing back in middle school -destroys it (invisibitch) -thinks he’s being merciful -izuku keeps thinking he sees the creature out of the corner of his eyes -pain comes randomly -can’t sleep -anticipation of pain keeps him awake -rubbing against ribs -move up appointment -talk with midnight -fanmail activity -“I am the American father waiting on the porch with a shotgun for whatever pathetic excuse for a date is gonna try and take my little angels to the prom.” -wants to hug him, he hates hugs -“I can only do so much” “so much is better than nothing” -rumors of people suddenly unable to use their quirks -might be an illness or one for all hurting him -gives in to anxiety medication -needs to get in contact with a specialist for nerve damage -takes up hound dogs suggestion of something from home

13. Nostalgia For The Future -deku goes home for a plushie, brings todoroki -mom isn’t home -todoroki likes his house, feels small but full -nothing about his dad -“would being his son make his obsession more or less weird?” -declares intent to become a hoarder -confesses to dream about losing his quirk and father hurting him for it -Despite recent trauma, deku hasn’t dreamt at all -swaps a book from all might for one of mom’s -nerve specialist, dendrite -rash -“as a fan I was impressed, but the doctor in me couldn’t help but cringe”. “See?  He gets it.” -neurotoxin as anesthetic (but why) -all might watches procedure -“the scene brings to mind ritual sacrifices from old movies” -maybe attacked during procedure, mess with vitals and life support -chemical evidence that izuku’s brain is firing off pain response -common fixation in young empaths, recreate perceived trauma in themselves -“was there?”  “...I could see bones poking out...” -basic testing comes up negative -“When you hear hoofbeats, think of horses not zebras”. Here we have a zebra -someone is using an empathy quirk on him -someone ate his leftovers -old all might plushie pats bunny -he was so done.  So done, that as he laid down to make a futile effort at sleep, it crossed his mind that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to never wake up. -izuku did wake up; to see Mini-him standing on the ground with a hole in his chest and a slash across his eyes. -wake up to bunny plushy with tears that mirror original victims

14. The Rolling Thing With Wings -Aoyama saw it this time -“Midoriya’s villain is real”, -something is for sure on campus -Aizawa and other teachers immediately go out and search -cold rain -lights catch black feathered mass that rolls away -Aizawa can’t get a good look -thing tries to flee but keeps getting cut off -uses dread quirk, flattens teachers -finally sees it, it cancels his quirk before he can -vanishes -hound dog smells izuku -back to dorm, all might and students comforting izuku -plushie remains the same but camera footage shows nothing -Aizawa and izuku compare dread effects -realizes it may go after his mom

15. Bittersweet Release -Inko arrives at mustafu train station early in the morning -phone call from Aizawa telling her not to go home -wait to be escorted by heroes -calls izuku, he confesses to what’s been going on -doesn’t want to risk putting her in the line of fire -kids spend the nights in the dorm shelter -“The villain was able to hover right over Midoriya’s bed while he slept.  Any one of those nights he could have killed him.  And since we didn’t have any evidence, we assumed he was having nightmares like everyone else.  Do you understand the gravity of what your inaction could have brought on?” -discussion of feelings with hound dog -apologies for doubt -rejoin students -news, villain warning issued -connections to missing food -anyone paying attention could figure out victim is izuku -harsh criticism of UA -izuku elects to take responsibility -hound dog leaves for meeting

16. Table Scraps -hound dog comes in late, cloth tied around mouth in place of muzzle -villain smelled like Midoriya, that close -teachers check security, limited evidence, suggest a quirk that can reverse/move outside of time -connection to missing food -Noumu theory is proposed due to multiple quirks and black appearance -all for one still in prison, twice? -similar to Yakku, get in contact -pathfinder shows map of trails -only found perimeter -entered town to chase the bus -villain seemed to stop existing -one missing quirk: night vision -meanwhile, pro heroes patrolling near apartment -“oh please.  All mights had a kid at UA since my parents were in school.” -spot a figure go up the stairs and enter with a key/silhouette in the window -nobody from the family is supposed to be nearby -go inside and confront the middle school-aged boy, mass under shirt -find him wandering the house, ignoring them -introduce themselves -he goes to sit on the main bed, eating, heroes angry -“waiting” “for who?” “My family” -“my house” -“NO”

17. Voight-Kompff -stitches out -out running for the first time in weeks -one for all makes him feel whole, pictures the previous users welcoming him back into their embrace -breath deeper -“this is mine.  This is me.” -“izuku wasn’t a spiteful person.  Not at all.  He got angry at villains for hurting people, yes, but he couldn’t recall at time where it felt personal.  So it came as a bit of a shock when he found himself pondering if the villain’s wings were hollow, like in birds.  They would break easier that way.” -“hopefully, it wouldn’t come to that.  But knowing his luck, he’d treat it like an inevitable.” -full cowl practice interrupted -“once it’s gone I can be with mom.” -medical exam with officers present -increase in students asking for sleep aids -izuku called back again, this time with teachers -karma for complaining about uraraka -gives back minihim -2 heroes murdered in his apartment the previous evening -it isn’t the artificial dread, it’s real -Like before: no security footage, food stolen, wiped search history, this time it seems clothes and personals were also stolen -“quirkless virus” show similar symptoms as victims of all for one -some have different quirks than before, usually minor -most are regular civilians, no hero, cop, or medical staff until murders -murder of diner owners still unclear -pattern, no pain on nights food is stolen -stealth quirks, likely to make another attack -DNA of feathers came back -same as izuku

18. Powder Keg -toga told to investigate league contact -warehouse trashed, dead everywhere -“Oh, yeah, no, they’re dead.  And whoever did it was super sloppy.” “Hang on, Dabs, I’m getting another call.” -answers dead guy’s phone -“how did I ever survive without the preserve jars?” -rumors of someone who broke into UA by themselves, after Izuku -elects to investigate -Superman presentation -outside heroes on campus -Outfield, izuku debates talking to him -unsure if they know the dna connection -calls mom, asks about family -we didn’t want you to feel like you were being replaced -class exercise, warned not to push it -izuku does something during exercise that spooks outfield -sleep in shelter past three nights -villain warning issued -other students don’t know about Izuku’s DNA -sleep in shifts -all might stays close -tries to text mom good night, signal can’t get through the concrete -eri is there, tries to cheer him up “Zawa said there’s a bad guy after you.” “She’s your biggest fan.”  “She might have to fight Kota for that.” -tells her she should go somewhere else since the bad guy is targeting him -she’s having none of it -later, eri and all might asleep on either side of him -keeps an eye on the door -hears sato’s phone buzz, he waves him off to signal his shift is over -lays back, tries to relax -sudden tightness in chest, opens eyes to see the other one standing on the ceiling directly above him

19. Fish in a Barrel -Aizawa realizes its a set up -the other one tries to stab him with the wing spike, eyes glowing red to erase his quick -rolls to cover eri and calls to the others -hits him in the head, disabling quirk -takes out lights -everyone tries to go for him, easily thrown back -slashed across multiple chests -the other tries to go for the door, todoroki freezes it -the other burns and breaks it down, vanishes -chase with bakugo, find toga -“my dad could breath fire” -teacher question how it could have gotten in with so many standing guard -it must have come in with them -mislead the heroes -comfort eri -wounds tended to -Tooru seriously hurt, crying, outlined by blood -idea floated to move izuku somewhere else -toga found wounded at the edge of campus

20. Walk Without Rhythm -“you’re sending me away?” -talk about moving izuku to protect the others -say goodbye outside, the want to lure it -switch trains last minute -dread fades -Aizawa says goodbye -appearance change -tooru wake up in hospital with parents -They met all might, other kids here and awake -tiger comes in with brace, izuku broke his shoulder -all might went back to help -discuss, don’t think the nomu was intentionally hurting them -tell that to midoriya -what are they doing with him -encounters old bullies who act like fans -Aizawa back with the others, discuss -public place.  Hundreds of people. Broad. Fucking. Daylight. -pathfinder there, nomu was inside for hours, quirk that displaces itself -nomu is intelligent, understands aizawa -only superfans and former students know him -izuku mentioned his father was as much of a fan -toga unresponsive -maybe move him to another safe house, evidence that the other is locating quirks through police records, he’s gotten through most defenses -victims have minor records -mom moved around too, discouraged from contacting her -better to hide, all might’s house -end of the day, tired and sweaty -brush appearance change out of his hair, hug -it’s the first time all day he’s felt like a person -“I’m sorry I left you behind”

21. All in All -izuku stays up late to call his dad -argue about timing -“sorry I didn’t call.  I wasn’t sure of your schedule in this mess and I didn’t want to bug you. “Sure” -mostly unaware of what’s happening, mom told them to talk -changes the subject to the Jakku seminar, tries to relate to quirk hurting him -thinks his dad only likes him for his quirk -“you can’t keep crying like this every time you’re stressed.  Youre sixteen, way to old to be crying like this.  You’re a hero.  Villains aren’t going to wait for you to get yourself together.” -“look, if you’re not gonna be invested in the conversation, maybe you should hang up, and we can talk later, ‘Kay?” -Skype call with Toga -managed to talk to it briefly, voice changer -the villain didn’t like her, in denial -said he would fix it -crusty and gross, waste of a healing factor -deku-kun is here, isn’t he? -tells jokes to distract from Dad -all might’s in specialty housing for tall quirks, modestly decorated with comic merch and newspapers -device to hide his life signs -fanart from Young Izuku on the fridge, bought the magnets just to put it up -old classmates posting about him online, he’s a cool hero -forum trolls, could probably take them -“I thought you were supposed to be discouraging me from picking fights with villain’s every other month.” “Oh hey look at that, you made a quip” -talk about feelings ⁃ is my rambling annoying, endearing -“it’s okay to still be upset, you know.  You don’t have to move on right away.” -year newspaper -butterfly returns to U.A., breaks window, noises, squeezes through naked -students pretend to sleep, half in costume -it passes over them

22. Idle Imprisonment -day 2, report comes in, three critically wounded policemen not far from u.a. -izuku does class work ⁃ all Might pins points on a map, far off -day 3, more reports of missing and mismatched quirks: tracking and radar -day four: 4 civilians and 1 hero murdered, several others injured -feathers through the eyes -mt lady back in action -izuku can’t take it, wants to go out and confront butterfly -massive argument with all might, hides in room again -“cabin fever!?” -all might figures he’ll try to sneak out, overhears him struggle, his windows don’t open

23. It Matters -later that night, all might offers dinner, goes to watch tv -izuku slinks out and eats with him on the couch -“think I don’t know how it feels?  To be stuck inside safe while the thing that hurt you is running free to do more harm?” -“I miss it sometimes, but I get to spend more time with you” “I’m not worth it.” -“if it hadn’t hurt me, I might not have met you.  Either my time limit didn’t force me to hear you out or I might not have come back to mustafu at all.” -back and forth about izuku’s worth, “are you trying to convince me to be happy or regretful” -“ok, lets try this: what do you hate about me?” -“I hate that you don’t trust me.”  “And you constantly treat me like a little kid!  Hate that too!”  “You are a kid!” -“I want you to tell me one thing you don’t like about me.  As a person.”  “Why?”  “If I have to be honest about how I feel so do you.  You only ever say nice things.  You act like there’s nothing wrong with me but there is.  If you don’t tell me, I’ll have to keep guessing.”  “...  back in the shelter, after the villain attack...  that was the only time I’ve ever heard you truly laugh.” “...  that’s it?” -“I, I’m not a fan of how you talk about that video of my debut.” “But, But It was a great rescue-“  “It was awful,” he snapped.  Midoriya recoiled.  Good.  “It was so awful.  Hundreds of people died.  Most of the people I pulled to safety didn’t pull through.  I hear them screaming still in my dreams.  I hated every second of that night.  And I hate that you love it.”   -“That shot one shot, the one people plaster everywhere, of me coming over the ridge carrying a dozen people?  Half of them were already dead.” -“How did you even see that anyway?”  “Mom said the news was running a special for the twenty-five year anniversary...  I watched it with my dad...”  “and you would have been what?  Two, three?” -talk about debut -tells him about Nana and his childhood -hid from villain’s like this “I loved her like my mother.” “Did she love you as a son.” -“it doesn’t matter.” It does. -talks about how izuku is great -never initiated a hug before, what else could he do besides pull him closer? -“I hate yelling at you.  You’ve had too much of that in your life.  I just want you to be happy.” -“and I’m going to keep you here until you realize how much you matter” -caught between child and adult, wonder what he’d be like had he never influenced him -will the scars on his arm grow with him? -he wanted to just keep holding him, to make up for all the times he should have but didn’t. -carries him to bed -“I can walk.” “I want to carry you.” -he’s going to be okay.  He’ll grow up.  Conquer the world with his smile.  Be the unshakable pillar the world needs, all Might had no doubt.  But not tonight.  Someday, but not tonight.  Tonight, he is a small terrified child, separated from his family, and on the run from an unknown horror.  Tonight, he deserves a moment to be scared and sad, and be comforted. -life sign hider gone -prays he stays just this small forever -he’s like a son to him -he stays for a while after he falls asleep, just to be sure

24. The Other One -all might dreams of his death at the hands of all for one/wolfram -wakes up to alarm, needs to eat -izuku inspired him to keep living, gets up to check on him -remembers the dream theory, goes to check his fridge -closes it, butterfly is right there -smells him before he sees him -running down a list of ways to get a hit in, major blood vessel in the temple -“Hello” silence, “are you all might?” Ask about fighting the ‘same’ villain Beat him with the help of his student Butterfly gets angry, the other one -“he’s almost shocked to here a human voice come out of it...  a young voice.” Other what -comes into the light, more scar than skin -talks him down, reaches out to touch him -doesnt believe -same shoes, faded and frayed and falling apart, but the same -never one to talk down hostage/suicide -says his name -butterfly stunned, cries at the kind touch -hug -same eyes -he’s izuku again

Reveal post - https://lckhr.tumblr.com/post/175255988293/okay-villaindeku-is-so-popular-right-now-but

I want to add to this real quick because I just dug up my original notes I wrote at 2 am last summer when I first thought of this fic and it reminded me of some stuff. The world of My Hero Academia is set up in such a way that whatever bullshit power you can think of will probably fit.  A lot of superhero universes have that, but something about MHA makes it so much more pronounced.  Combine that with the idea of All for One, a quirk that lets the user wield an unknown number of powers, and there is some serious potential to absolutely abuse the setting. The idea was to create a lone villain that could perfectly counter everything thrown at it, to the point where it feels like a supernatural monster.  Security?  Quirk that prevents cameras and sensors from recording its image.  Evidence?  Quirk that rewinds time on displaced objects.  Witnesses?  Quirk that prevents people who are already asleep from waking up.

25. Butterfly: Origin -“as hard as he tried throughout his life, Toshinori knew he could never be Superman.” -“He wants to hurt your boy/ but he is my boy” -all might feeds him, too thin, still heavy -talks him into taking a bath while he makes him a warm meal -Texts his izuku to be silent and contact Naomasa -stolen possessions with his clothes, folding quirk, , flattening, sticker quirk -cries at the red shoes -butterfly comes back out, reveals wings -all might makes him a cutout shirt and sling for vestigial wings -its a cold night,hairdryer, hopefully izuku sees the opportunity -“he’s so gentle.  The boys arms are thinner than his.  It’s wrong.  He feels like any pressure greater than a brush will shatter bones.  He could break his fingers with a pinch.  But maybe he should.  This is a villain.  It tried to kill my boy.  But he is my boy.” -“did you ever fly?” “Once” -“it’s okay, you didn’t know.” -getting scolded for hurting himself is universal -so is being a chatterbox -considers Christmas present in the closet -tells him to lay down on the couch and watch tv -butterfly asks about one for all, consent -admits to killing Mirio -all might asks about all for one, vague backstory -noticed something was wrong after usj -“he said there was a time where there wasn’t a single child in Japan born without his permission.” “It was a mercy killing at that point.” -more time in a day, imprisoned for seemingly twice as long -drawn to yakku by picture of lodge that looks like apartments -“I heard someone say my name” -lie, offered to trade quirk, got in a drunken fight -has both parents quirks, implied to have killed Dad -wanted to scare his izuku into going home, no one was there, took it out -has mom’s quirk, “someone else lives there now.” -tried to find mom, “once he’s gone, I can be with mom.” -“I’m only hurting me. I’m not worth it -inter-dimensional quirk, -Inching closer to all might -you didn’t say that, the other you did -all might confronts him on his crimes, defense is that they started it -“you’re not right” -puts head in all might’s lap and moves his hand to his head -found izuku, jealous of his life, not sure what to do -realizes that izuku has one for all -“WHY�� -describes the sludge villain incident -compare outcomes -butterfly gets upset, prepares to strike -all might says sorry

26. Bizarro -izuku listening in the whole time -attacks butterfly as he’s about to strike -wounds all might in the chest -butterfly screams accusations -brutal fight, bitten ear -izuku stands up to dread -ripped vestigial wings clean off -fight, flees at approach of heroes -wind and rain enter through broken window, mess up all mights hero shrine -izuku still feels like he has grime on his hands from the wing -its me -hospital, all might severely injured but stable -sneaks into room -stabbed where his lung used to be -“Did I ever apologize for saying you couldn’t be a hero?” -apologizes through tears for saying izuku can’t be a hero -sad hugs -tells nurse that he’s his son

27. Same -thinks butterfly is holding him -Aizawa says nurses told him all might was with his son, calls it inappropriate -hesitant to leave all might -please don’t take him from me -all might holds onto him for as long as he can -Aizawa wants to call them over dramatic, but this feels warranted -it’s me, i know -news from kids perspective -Sero -escorted everywhere, never alone -no way to tell what’s going on -wake up, check the news -need to confront butterfly -meeting in a moving vehicle -Pathfinder there, special sunglasses -how many were killed, lie -Butterfly’s notes, crinkled and overfilled, izuku can read them -addresses, quirks? -safe places, food,  Trying to find home -plan A, swan dive -he was trying to get me to kill myself -plan b, kidnap to other dimension and kill, pose as the same one having been tortured -what’s plan c? -more missing quirks and murders, offensive capabilities -pathfinder attacked, quirk stolen -team of heroes go over what they know about him -analysis of wing he ripped off -rapid nerve death, theorize that his healing quirk is killing him -why hasn’t it? Quirk preventing organ failure -once the body runs out of fat, it goes for muscle -after muscle, it goes for cardiac muscles -that’s what the dread is, empathy -perpetually on the brink of a heart attack -means they might be able to go all out against him -uses inter dimensional quirk to conceal movement -ask izuku what he could mean by the right quirk -memory alteration, body swap -all might Skyped in “You’ve been trying to clean up the mess the other you made, let me do the same.” -you didn’t fail, the other you did -how to restrict movement, only ever does it outside -shelters never built in his world -set a trap, need a place that doesn’t exist in butterfly’s world

28. The Net -go through the tunnels to the main shelter under the school -can’t discuss the plan Bakugou tries to ignore him and unpack his stuff Izuku flinches from contact -says goodbye to classmates I love you all, thanks for being my friend...  you have no idea what it’s meant to me -don’t talk like that, it makes it sound like you’re not coming back! -hugs -midnight cries -talk with Bakugou -shapeshifter butterfly -it’s a forced smile.  “Forced” is the only way to describe it yet if feels like it isn’t enough. -new bunker at UA -limited air conditioning -pathfinder walks him through messing with his quirk -i got your letter -did you know them?  They were good people -didn’t mean to be so harsh, people get hurt when you aren’t good enough -step outside briefly, the world is so much more vibrant without his quirk in the way -“it’s a tomb” “yeah.  Let’s make sure it’s not yours” -obvious trap, he won’t be enough -need bait -all might about to be discharged -agrees to stay as the casualties of the trap will be sent to the same location -inko enters, told to wait for her son there -got stolen stuff back -izukus first all might toy -talk with all might, maybe izuku’s Dad, left around the time he was quirkless -I want to push him forward, but also want to shield him from the world -welcome to parenthood -asked for blood drawn

29. You Shoot It -dream of deer in the woods, all turn to look at him together, one missing a face -toga disguised as izuku’s mom, distract him long enough to ceil the doors -no sign of butterfly -concern -butterfly enters by bending the door, an army of bugs -Izuku watches from another room, he’s a last resort -toga tries to convince him to stop fighting, can’t -something off -tries to stab him, nothing -turn around -cut to Aizawa -Bakugou seizing, that’s not Deku -“suit up” -strangled -fight -Cementoss seals the door -upgraded -pain sharing, metal feathers, ribbon skin, black bone, fero blood, wing spears, teeth bombs, throw feathers, telekinesis, fire breath -attacks do nothing -it’s an illusion -turn around, butterfly strikes while looking at him reveals partially healed form, antlers Flee out the room, fighters overrun by cockroaches Erasure is his most powerful quirk Izuku flanks him and kicks him in the skull, blocked by antlers -antlers become bendy and grab him Butterfly tries to go for izuku’s eyes using mom’s quirk -other heroes quickly tossed aside -chase down izuku through the maze -fold hole in the wall -punch in the jaw, teeth explode -izuku nearly overpowered -held down completely -strangled

-Aizawa and the class rush to the entrance, blocked off -must be a fail safe, butterfly was meant to break in -break down the doors -what if butterfly manages to escape -mina’s acid, strong punching, laser, explosions Aoyama asks for braces or someone to hold him while he blasts the ground -anger he doesn’t have the right quirk -knows his is the only one that can disable butterfly -they have to take the risk

-held down completely, erasure flickers -Pathfinder hits him with a baton and tries to choke him, distracting him -only one eye -izuku breaks free with 100% -smashes Butterfly’s eyesocket with his knuckle -blood splashes in his face as he flees -scream behind him -arm strained, can’t tell if it’s broken -pathfinder’s fate unknown -brief visions, body swap quirk Realize butterfly has been holding back because he wants a healthy body Test how much

-aizawa run through the maze -find pathfinder -hear screaming

-leap though illusion and snap off one of butterfly’s wings -tear membrane with own feather, cut between broken bones -it tries to crawl back to him -illusion breaks, revealing deer skull -flee, openly crying, bleeding tears -lock hands, izuku breaks others fingers, -wings burst from his back, heroes hold back wings -powers through pain and dread Leaps up and smashes the floor to pieces -butterfly screaming at him Jump at each other -Spears izuku in the back Break through the ceiling -Aizawa erases his quirks -restored appearance fades, more decayed than ever -izuku kicks and breaks his neck

30. YU SHOOT ITT -izuku was fading -a round face, a thin face, green eyes both -something shiny bobbing in and out of sight -butterfly stream of conscious -reuse lines from before -senses izuku in the other room -force shared pain and empathy as he’s dying -izuku screams in agony -felt his stomach split again.  A candle to a forest fire.  Pathetic. “This is mine.  This is me.” -shared perspective -why do you deserve to be happy and i don’t -you kill people, tired to get me to kill myself -but before, i didn’t do anything wrong -why did it all go so bad? -gets up, floats with his quirk -barely copies normal movement -Floats to the door -Aizawa stops him -hard to breath -feels his mom and all might comforting him -that’s really mom -force the connection harder -stop screaming i wanna hear what mom’s saying Aizawa cuts him off again, he cries Feels his bones sink -“do you think if I die in this world, I can still be with my mom?” -goes down struggling -“it’s not fair”

31. At Rest, At Last -izuku flatlines but is revived -undo the latches on his costume Taken back for surgery Sit in the hall and cry for hours -a defibrillator is for a different kind of heart attack -so that’s what it was?  A heart attack? Doctor rushes by with an ice box Explain to aizawa that izuku flatlined -butterfly is dead, new despair -took his stomach for izuku -inko and all might go to see butterfly -inko wants to see him, takes a moment to recognize him -that’s her baby -screams -hugs and apologies -all might would have gone to stay with him -they both despair but are thankful for their son -“he was barely five years old, and he was ready to accept that his family didn’t want him.” -goes back to izuku -his hand is bigger than hers, when did that happen?

-final casualty count, pathfinder dead (?) along with several police officers -doctor recounts the autopsy -butterfly was dead on his feet, practically killed him -barely enough muscle to hold his own head up, let alone stand -“in my unprofessional opinion, this was a mercy killing.” -Aizawa looks at the body, that’s midoriya -Aizawa wants to try and bring him back with eri, Might not work, Might traumatize her -argue, all Might says he was too far gone, they wouldn’t be able to shield him from criminal charges, record like his would net him the death penalty anyway, stuck in a cage again, all that hate and fear in his heart left to fester in a padded cell for the rest of his life -thinks he would come after izuku again, what do you think that screaming was?  He was trying to take him down with him. -not hurting anyone else, not hurting himself -“He said he wanted, more than anything, to rest/stop fighting/for the pain to stop, and now, he has.” -“Aizawa-kun. ..  Please let him rest.” -Aizawa leaves before he can break down

-toshi looks over butterfly -“an innocent butterfly, drowned in mud and crushed under the boot of the world.” -not innocent, but he felt someone should be there to see him off -Apologizes -runs hand through his hair, shushes him even though he’ll be silent for quite a while -hesitant to leave him -that’s my boy...  That could have been my boy -bodyswap lingers in his mind -kisses his hairline, touch of cold lingers -goes to wash his hands and face before returning to izuku -wakes up later -“he’s dead” “I know.”

32. All Those Moments -

-aizawa drives back to ua with midnight -she tries to joke with aoyama about makeup, he’s not having it -won’t go into details about butterfly -mic greats them at the gate, hug -comes back to dorms to welcome party “Midoriya’s villain is dead.” -they cheer -Bakugou pulls him aside to try and get answers -people who’s job it is to save lives should never celebrate the death of another human being, be relieved, be thankful, but do not celebrate -don’t cheer for death -cries while holding eri -mic and midnight ask him what’s wrong -he was just a Kid

-do you want to be buried or cremated, inko can’t stop thinking about that phrase -3 services in three days -mass wake for officers -izuku makes rounds, “your child/spouse/parent” saved my life -inko almost couldn’t get out of the car -izuku said he had to come -pathfinder funeral, mention the teens and neji -he saved my life, i want to be worthy -crematorium, limited service in his home town -service in jakku -speak briefly to stripes -ask to speak at the wake, doesn’t have the best luck with speeches -mom asks why, he didn’t really know him -Jakku heroes offer him a job, we’ll save you a spot says he never wants to come back here -pass a boarded up diner -I’m his mother, i should be here -never spoke with butterfly, never in the same room when he was alive -cold gripping horror at burying her own son -service ends in slow motion -no words exchanged -silent for the whole long drive home -dotes on izuku at home -not home, couldn’t bare the thought of sleeping where someone died -all might rented a place/or all might’s apartment -he carries around his all might and blankie -makes him food, watches tv -cuddle in her bed like when he was small -her sweet baby boy grew up to face unfathomable horror -wants to promise no one will hurt him again, they both know she can’t

-villain graveyard -“Izuku Midoriya, 16 years old, at rest at last tailored clothes around his wings, buried is his shoes -izuku goes to butterfly, stares His bones wouldn’t burn He suffered 16 years old, seventeen in a few months, he’ll grow.  Live. Make sure he keeps living ⁃ Took midoriya to view the body before it was buried.  Stared, said nothing -all might dusts of the grave, leaves a few flowers and food -still conflicted, butterfly was worse case scenario, uses it as motivation to protect his boy -he longs for some sign.  Waits for some great vision that the boy is well in the end.  A butterfly wing broken wings that still flies.  One on the tombstone.  It’s the dead of winter.  Him coming to him in a dream, face full and bright and back bare of those fowl wings that shackled him to the earth, and promising him that he’s not in pain anymore.  But it never comes.  Butterfly died in agony, after years of torture, alone. -“Toshinori wasn’t a religious man, but he still hoped that, if something did become of young butterfly in the en`d, that he at least got to rest.” -he might be moving into the same new building as the Midoriyas -picks up Izuku from first therapy session, not much to say -you’re my boy aren’t you? -don’t want to say anything that makes him spiral further Do you remember what happened before this all started? -we talked about Superman, you said your name was inspired by all Star Superman -and... -rumors about being his son, “I don’t mind” -cry, hug and a kiss on top of his head -sixteen years old, he’s my son -return home -izuku stares out the window Take him to the tokoyaki stand Sit on the beach wall -cuddle like they did the night before butterfly attacked -izuku crawls up his sleeve and presses his forehead -yeah.  Yeah you’re mine.

⁃ When Butterfly was around, he never had nightmares.  Now that he’s dead, Izuku has nothing but. -izuku can’t sleep, -home doesn’t feel like home anymore -people died here, in this world, and the other one -has nightmares when he’s awake too, they’re memories -likes All Might’s thin arms, likes to be carried, better than those too big that held him like a pet while the bones in his back pulled away from the rest of his body. -checking himself in the mirror, scars on his chest fading fast, no evidence if he covers it up -asked the doctors to remove his scars when he went back to get his stitches out, just the ones from Butterfly, back to what he was before -regrets it -looked butterfly in the face, up close, in the eyes, and though: that’s not me.  It can’t be -looks at himself now, his own face in the mirror, and thinks: that’s not me.  It can’t be -too thick, skin to smooth, hand in his hair to search for antlers -I’m me, aren’t I? -text from friends, excited to have him back -compulsion to go outside, he does -it’s cold out without a shirt, starting to snow -I could just go -wants to run, from what? -doesn’t want to face the others How can he just go back to normal? -if i don’t say something now, i never will -wake up mom, I’m ready to talk about it now -sees all might in the kitchen again, mom too -visions of the other ones life

-Bakugou s body, swollen and broken -desperation to find a school that will take him -walk past the gates -sell blood -luxury apartment -All for one, first quirk are the cherub wings, small, but his -not the only one, testing multiple quirks, isn’t sure when he becomes the favorite -wings are painful coming in, all for one holds him -gave in eventually -can’t see all of the wings in the mirror, shine green in the light -lakies make fun of his failure, requests quirk to stop crying -creates copy of all for one -usj, something wrong, gets erasure -flees out the window, can’t get home, returns willingly -tested on with mutation quirks as punishment, cries when he discovers minor telekinesis -isn’t there for Kamino allegory, acts desperate to save Sensei, erases immortality quirk -tries to go home again, authorities mistake him for villain, programmed to attack -he finds Dad.  Dad, who hadn’t so much as touched him in a decade, picks him up and holds him like its nothing.  He kisses his head and calls him baby and tells him everything is going to be alright because he’s here now.  And it was for a while.  He fed him and bathed him.  He sleeps tucked close to his chest like when he was little, even if the wings took up a lot of space.  He has to comfort his father when he cries for mom, since he can’t cry anymore.  He and takes him to the doctor.  They don’t know how to help him.  He says he wants everything but moms quirk to go.  Dad doesn’t understand why he has it.  He doesn’t listen.  He never does.   At least you aren’t quirkless anymore Steals dad’s quirk to teach him a lesson about being quirkless Dad only came back for mom.  He said so.  He was missing for over a year and only came back after mom went missing.  He blames him.  He burns off the tips of his wings. -they think he’s a villain -Kills mirio -trades quirks for money, later just food -chase anything related to mom -wanders to Jakku, ua goes there around this time of year and he saw an ad for a lodge that looked kind of like home -hears his own name -demands the bridge quirk guy trade him, had enough -kills.  Jumps.  Sees himself, up on a stage in a hero costume from his dreams, smiling among deafening cheers.  And he shares his dread. -sees both of himself, locking eyes in the ambulance, round face, thin face, green eyes both, watching and feeling each other die

-run back inside -wake up mom and all might -i don’t think I’m me anymore -stuck with all this anger and hatred and fear -can’t tell the difference -all might says he feels guiltily instead of angry -but i am angry -writes as he talks -it’s like one glass of water being poured into another glass of water -hard to tell where the first ends and the second begins and you can’t separate them -did he take something from you -don’t know -“after all that, do you still think you made the right choice?”  “Never came into question.” -has his whole life ahead of him -going to die eventually -takes out notebook -“Butterfly” crosses it out, rights his own name -lies between the two people who love him most -all might’s hand on his chest, holding him -other arm curling mini him to his chest -mom has his blankie -izuku has his all might plushie -tomorrow, he goes back to all his friends at the best hero school in the country -people like him, he has fans -almost too good to be true -this is all butterfly wanted -all i ever wanted -more than i could have ever asked for No one stalking me, no one chasing me -I’m home -do i deserve it though? -have to make decisions, could spiral -have to go back out into the world and keep living -for now, he let himself feel happy -the two sides agree to feel happy -“this is mine.  This is me.  And there’s nothing I can do about it.” -and for now, I’ll let it make me happy -this is mine, this is me -deep under guilty happiness, lies dread he knew could only come from himself. -this dread could only be his own.  Maybe it was always. -it’s mine.  It’s me. -whoever i am, I’m alive -no matter what i do, whoever i am, I’m me.  I’m me.

[intoapuddle]

Top 5 OCs from your fics!

ooo! i’m so bad at ranking but i’ll definitely mention my five favourites in no particular order :) also be wary of spoilers because i don’t really talk vaguely about them! read with caution!! lmao

Tom from Time’s Tide I think this might actually be my favourite OC, because once I figured out his role in Phil’s story it really got the ball rolling in terms of how I wanted it to go. I really enjoy writing characters that had a profound impact on the main character that made them hold resentment towards them, but at the same time not posing them as a villain. One of the most fun parts of writing Time’s Tide was the way Phil treated Dan as Tom had treated him for a while, and all of the ways that part of his life affected his relationship with Dan. And at the same time, he was still a safe spot for Phil because he knew everything about him and still cared about him, you know? It makes for a lot of contradicting feelings and I just love writing relationships and characters with that complexity in mind.

Morgan from Monochrome If I’m gonna be a hundred percent real, I based Morgan on my friend Fi (psychicmoth) before we were even close friends because... I just always vibed with her optimism and the love she put into her art. And Morgan definitely became a favourite for me because she was such a positive influence on Dan. While I love complexity, Dan had so much to work through with everyone else in that story that writing someone who was just truly there for him with no bullshit to wade through was a breath of fresh air and I think that’s why a lot of the readers took a big liking to her too. AND obviously, because I had the perfect person in mind while writing her. Who doesn’t love Fi?? To think this story was what brought Fi to become one of my best friends is so interesting too like... that’s beyond me but yeah. I love Morgan and Fi :’)

Orella from Orella LMAO okay bear with me. She’s the only real OC fantasy character I’ve written in phanfic and well she’s just obviously stunning and gorgeous and takes such good care of her simps?? She’s kept a special place in my heart even if it was just a two chapter smutty story :’)

Deborah from Time’s Tide Similarly to Morgan, Deborah had a positive impact on Phil in the story and a comforting effect on him throughout. I think characters like that always resonate with the readers and honestly on the writers too? I really liked writing her because it also emphasised the relationship Phil had to his family, and the way she supported him in ways they hadn’t for different reasons. While Tom was a mirror to Phil’s future relationship with Dan, Deborah mirrored Phil’s relationship with his family. I really like characters that have that kind of effect and yeah. Deborah is just good and safe.

i can’t really think of more oc’s right now but thank you i hope you enjoy reading about these four!

[capricornus-rex]

In the Face of Fear (4)

Cal Kestis x Reader

Requested by @stellar-trinity​

Summary: Kashyyyk has its own charms and surprises, but what if one of those said surprises rear its ugly, unpleasant head right in front of you in the form of a spider that’s the size of a boulder?

Tags: Arachnophobia, Wyyyschokk, Matriarch Wyyyschokk, Kashyyyk, Arachnophobic! Reader

A/N: My bad! Realized just now that I didn’t put the links of the chapters! ;;;A;;; So sorry!

Also in AO3

Chapters: 1 – 2 | Previous: Part 3 | Next: Part 5 | Masterlist

4 of ?

The glow of your lightsabers have either attracted or irritated them enough to make them crawl out of those holes in the wall.

Literally back to back with one another, you and Cal are being circled by the spiders. There are at least five closing the ring.

“BEE, BEE-TRIIILL!!” shrilled a panicked BD-1.

“I know, I know! I see them!” you shrieked back.

Your fighting grip falters around your saber, your swings are flimsy, and your strikes bore little damage—it could only graze their hides and anger them more, which is never good. One Wyyyschokk had its head full of eyes on you, flickering its mandibles with a gluttonous excitement, it lured closer while you backed away. The normal-sized ones were somewhat less of a challenge for you to overcome your phobia, still a challenge nonetheless. You’re only hoping the mother doesn’t show up and get itself involved.

Cal cut through their numbers effortlessly. You envied him. Envied the fact that these arachnids don’t bother him to the same degree as they do to you. Fighting these humongous crawlers felt taxing, though you still fought them to get it over with; when this wave finally settled, the two of you went on the move, going in blind into their labyrinthine dwelling.

“This way!”

“Are you sure?!”

“I know it!”

Holding his saber over his head, Cal leads the way—twisting and turning, you don’t know anymore if you’ve turned left or right this time but you still followed him. Hope burning within you that both of you will get out of this horrendous place alive soon. The two of you continued running, hand-in-hand, you looking out for the rear while he takes the lead; eventually, you got to the edge, and hopped along the rock platforms which vaguely resembled the path to the Gorgara’s pit in Dathomir.

“We’re just going further in!” you gasped at the realization.

“Don’t worry, there’s surely a way out,” reassured the boy.

There was barely any light in the deeper pit that you’ve jumped into. You strained your neck, tilting up to examine the area, searching for any visible opening that could serve as a way out, until you found one—high up in the ceiling of the cave is a rabbit hole of sorts.

“Look overt here!” you pointed to the cave’s oculus.

Cal scanned the hole and its surroundings, planning out the climb route. He knows you’re not equipped with climbing claws, instead you’re armed with a grappling hook appendaged to your gauntlet. You were doing the same thing: mapping out where to shoot the hook.

“There’s a small enough ledge I can perch on. From there, I can wire my way through...” you paused. “I think.”

He shot you a look that easily translates to “You think?” and he stares at you for a considerable amount of seconds until you look back at him, throwing back a look that responds as “What?”

“It’s doable!” you argued.

“I don’t doubt that,”

As you navigate around the deeper pit, something about it gives off a different ambience. Waving your saber around, you notice that the tree bark and the walls made out of rock were dappled with silky, white wisps. You even shone a light on animal carcasses and insect husks—you even spotted the remains of what ought to be a juvenile Tach.

“Trill... Beeep...”

I know, BD-1, we’re getting out of here sooner than you think,” Cal calmed the droid on his shoulder.

Looking around some more, you find more and more animal carcasses—many of which have fallen prey to a trap that rendered them immobile and defenseless against the monstrosity that created such an elaborate trap.

“This is no cave,” you said as-a-matter-of-factly. “This is a nest.”

Cal held his head up, using his saber as a torchlight, and absentmindedly spun around to register that it is indeed a nest. However, his ankle slighted backwards, the heel of his boot sticking to the web-trap laced with a viscous adhesive; strings of the substance formed between his shoe and the soil, hindering his footsteps. He didn’t feel it in the first few inches, only did he realize he was in trouble and the Wyyyschokk that had been lurking and following you around had gotten him in its grasp before he could alert you.

His grunt caused you to turn around and just when you think this day couldn’t get any worse, the Wyyyschokk that got him is the Matriarch Wyyyschokk.

“[Y/N]!!” Cal cracked, squirming in its coiled legs around his body.

Poor Cal saw his life flashing before his eyes, he could see it all replaying past the wide-open maws and fangs of the great Wyyyschokk. For a moment, he knew what your phobia felt like, and had a deeper understanding of it. The sheer horror overtook him and rendered his throat voiceless.

You melted to the muddy floor, you knees have lost their foundation, and your senses have dulled with your eyes glued to the monster. You blindly patted the soil, searching for anything, holding your unwanted gaze at the vibrant, prismatic color of the spider like that of a crow to a shiny trinket.

As the Matriarch Wyyyschokk slowly puts her would-be prey closer to her mouth, a hard, solid thump interrupted her—you had picked up a stone and lobbed it, hitting her head. When she turned around to face you, the creature was expressionless but somehow you can feel that wave of wrath gradually boiling within her.

“Oh damn it!” you immediately regretted it and scrambled to your feet, your heels failing to hold themselves upright, along with the wet soil not being very helpful.

You attempt to outrun the Matriarch Wyyyschokk at the last second; knowing full well that you’re literally an arm’s reach, the spider stretches out her free leg to your direction. It’s a twisted imagining to think of her holding these two humans and wave them about like dolls.

Saber in hand, you thumbed the switch. A radiant beam of light wildly growling out of the emitter. You could almost feel the hair of the Matriarch’s leg just centimeters away from your spine; with one swing of your arm, in result, she lost hers. The mother spider reared back in pain, though, remarkably, she was able to keep a firm grip on Cal—she just thrashed him around, suspended in mid-air, her swerving throes dizzied the poor boy.

You crawled into a thicket the size of a bramble bush, offering enough protection from being grappled by the Wyyyschokk, but you wouldn’t leave Cal behind. While the Matriarch was distracted in trying to claw you out of the thicket, Cal had finally broken out of her grip and scrambled away himself. Immediately igniting his saber, he watched the lumbering beast of an arachnid look at her now-empty leg, turn around in search of her prey, and hiss angrily at him for escaping.

Now that the Matriarch isn’t after you, it’s the perfect time to get out. Cal was holding out on his own just fine, but you knew you had to help him—the intent is there, but your fear was the main hindrance of you doing so. Cal turned to you.

“[Y/N], get to safety! I can handle this!”

“No, I’m not leaving you!”

While the two of you argued, the Matriatch Wyyyschokk—which is too smart for an animal—took the opportunity of her preys being distracted with each other and quick tucked her legs closer to her fangs, they moved with great precision and speed. The glands just underneath the spider’s jugular were doing its work, excreting a substance that’s greenish-white and thin as string, her amputated leg was still capable of holding it while the other spun and spindled the threads.

It was too late when Cal returned his attention to the spider. At the last minute, the Matriarch Wyyyschokk lobbed her spooled creation towards the boy—instantly trapping him in a cocoon of her own web. He discovers the material to be stronger and thicker than the regular Wyyyschokks’ thus harder to break out of. He can’t even move his fingers to get to the switch of his saber!

You shrieked out Cal’s name; he squirmed as he plopped to the ground, essentially helpless and immobile—like the remains of prey during their final hours—the Matriarch must have thought she’s finally resolved this one nuisance. The spider closes in on the cocooned redhead writing on the floor, when she towered over the Jedi boy, he felt like the only thing that could break out of this silky prison is his wildly beating heart. In the spur of a moment, you threw yourself between the Matriarch’s jaws and Cal, and deflected her as she was about to lunge and sink her thick fangs into the boy. Effectively, your saber singed her mandibles and perhaps the roof of her mouth when she “bit” into the blade. The Wyyyschokk stepped back in a fit of burning pain, while doing so, you turned to Cal and figured out how you’re gonna get him out of there.

You broke one of the most fundamental rule of fighting.

Never turn your back on the enemy—until it’s truly dead.

“The web’s too thick!”

You straightened your back while kneeling and held your saber mere inches over his body, “Stay still so I don’t burn you!”

“W-Wait!” he fretted, his clear green irises popping out of the whites of his eyes.

“Don’t worry, I got a steady grip,” you reassured, clueless of what he’s really panicking for.

“No, [Y/N], look out!”

The Matriarch had snatched you the same way she did with Cal. While you wriggle in her leg, she pulls you in closer to her face—it doesn’t matter if her mouth’s burned, all she needs to do is devour you, thus you’ve been rid of—though it was an opportunity: you gathered all the power in one leg and stamped her face hard with the sole of your boot, so hard in fact, that the mud that had caked the sole left a mark on the spider’s face. Afterward, you kicked her in th eeyes with the point of your boot, and did this repeatedly until the Wyyyschokk budges and lets you go.

[stillebesat]

Stille’s Sanders Sides Master Post (Updated September 9th, 2022)

Here’s my official Master Post of my Sanders Sides Fics! 

All of them can also be found on my Ao3 account NikaylaSarae. ^^;;

For Tumblr, the links to all my stories are below the cut. <3

Enjoy!

The Brilliant 3 A.M. Idea  -Roman gets an Idea at 3am and must tell Thomas. -Inspired from Image posted by: organisoitukaaosteoria, Fic request: darude-sanderstorm

The Nest -Patton misplaces his cardigan and finds it in an unexpected spot. Inspired from series of text posts by: the-zebra-dragon and arc852, Fic request: sidewritings

That’s How You Know -Roman is feeling low after not getting a part he auditioned for and desperately wanted. The others step in to cheer him up. Song!Fic -That’s How You Know from Enchanted

Out There: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 -Logan finds himself alone in the apartment. So he does something he usually doesn’t do. Sing. Song!Fic -Out There from Hunchback of Notre Dame

Deep Heart: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 -When Logan leaves the others in Patton’s room, Virgil takes matters into his own hands and ends up revealing a secret Patton wanted to keep hidden. (takes place at the end of Moving On ½) Inspiration from This Post Courage, Braveheart: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 -Virgil had known since he was young that his chances for living long were slim. Still, he had hoped to have lived a little bit longer.

A Sweet Discovery -It’s 2 a.m. and Tiny!Logan is on the prowl for sweets. Tiny!Sides

It Takes Two -When Logan can’t convince Thomas to not give into peer pressure in a potentially dangerous situation, he turns to the Side he thought he’d never go to for help. Virgil.

Found in the Glitter -Working backstage is not always the easiest, especially when Virgil manages to get on the new guy’s nerves. Theatre AU

A Rainbow Connection -Roman’s on the run, desperate to escape the man who’s been able to control his entire life just by looking into his eyes. Hopping from airport to airport, Roman unexpectedly runs into the person who gave him the key to slipping from the Cobra’s mental control; Thomas Sanders.   Song!Fic

Shades of Truth: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 - -Everyone has secrets, Roman knows this. But after dealing with Deceit in the most recent video and discovering that Virgil doesn’t like liars…he decides to come clean with a secret he’s been hiding from the other Sides.

Meeting Einstein -It’d been a horrible no good very bad and awful day, and all Patton wanted was to play with the puppies in the local pet store to cheer himself up. Instead he finds something completely different.

True Colors  -There’s a place in the mindscape that Roman only goes to as a last resort when the criticism from the others becomes too much. Unfortunately, it’s becoming an all too frequent occurrence.

A Work of Art -After a rough night of public humiliation at the hands of his old rival, Roman just wants to take a shower and get some sleep. His roommate has something else in mind though.

Contained-Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 -You know what they say about Creativity. It’s best if it’s locked away.

FreeFalling- Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 -Sometimes you just need to take a leap of faith. Winged!AU

The Butterfly Effect- Chapter 1  Chapter 2  Chapter 3  Chapter 4  Chapter 5  Chapter 6  Chapter 7  Chapter 8  Chapter 9  Chapter 10  Chapter 11  Chapter 12  Chapter 13  Chapter 14  Chapter 15  Chapter 16  Chapter 17  Chapter 18  Chapter 19  Chapter 20  Chapter 21  Chapter 22  Chapter 23  Chapter 24  Chapter 25  Chapter 26  -Roman has three chances to change his life for the better. Three chances to fix past mistakes. Three chances to totally screw it all up. But who said life is worth living unless one takes a little risk?

The Training Program-It’s five a.m.. Virgil hasn’t yet slept and Thomas is summoning him. That couldn’t be good.

A Hero’s Rescue Part 1  Part 2 -After being defeated in battle, the last thing Roman expects is to have a soaking wet hero show up at his doorstep.

The Beginning -Creativity has an idea. A wonderful, awesome idea. Now…if only Creativity could focus enough to make the idea a reality.

Little Lies - Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  -All he’d been looking for when he’d revealed himself to Thomas was a little less work. One less secret to hide. One less thing to keep Thomas from knowing because his host didn’t want to know. To say it had backfired for Deceit was a bit of an understatement.

White Lies - Part 1  Part 2  Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 -Sequel to Little Lies -Deceit has been stuck in his ‘role’ as Dilyn for almost a year now. It’s about time he changed that.

CatScratch - Virgil’s learned to expect a lot of things helping the police solve murders, but he never thought that they’d actually find something that could crack his own unsolved case.

The Finish Line - After years of training, Logan Star is finally going to accomplish the one goal he’s had since his first High School track meet. Beat Roman Prince.

Growing Pains -Part 1  Part 2  Part 3 -For the past year Logan has been fighting to keep a part of himself hidden. Only now, thanks to Roman, he’s been compromised.

The Grade -Patton: I’m sorry I graded your tests in magic marker, but I just felt like it.

Seeking Warmth -If he’d known he’d be spending the rest of eternity freezing to death on Earth, Deceit would never have left Hell in the first place.

Spilled Milk -Logan never expected to get in the middle of a fight while at the self-checkout of a grocery store.

Egg-stenuating Circumstances -Why is it that the simplest of quests for Roman always end up more complicated than they should be?

The Rise of Deceit -With the Dragonwitch destroying the kingdom, the Crown Prince has a difficult choice to make.

Tattered -Part 1  Part 2 -Left to fend for himself, Roman can’t trust anyone…right?

Raindrops and Cookies -Most people would only be focused on getting themselves out of the rain. Patton isn’t most people.

A Special Delivery -Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  - “The stork brings the baby to deserving parents.” He whispered, quoting the words from memory. “All the lost, forgotten, and alone.”

In These Tangled Webs: Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11 -It should be easy admitting to your roommates that you’re not entirely human. Only in Logan’s case it’s not. Not when he discovers that Patton is afraid of Spiders.

The Old Hoodie - 2 sentence prompt –Thomas glared at Virgil, eyes filled with hate, and held out Virgil’s old hoodie, obviously expecting him to take it and go back to who he used to be. “I don’t trust Dark Sides.“

I Miss The King: Part 1  Part 2 -2 sentence prompt -“I miss you… I miss the King” a sigh “Apparently, it’s the same for me.”

Infinitesimal -Logan isn’t quite sure why Roman thinks he needs his help at three in the morning.

To Break A Curse: 2 sentence prompt -Logan looked at Roman, eyes dark. “I need you to really think about what you’re saying, because you’re going to hurt Virgil even more if you do not.“  

Shutting Down -Having your phone die shouldn’t be that big of a deal…right?

Anxious to Touch - Virgil ca’t be around the others without hurting them, so he has to stay away. Only Deceit won’t let him do that.

The Path: A Tale of Trick or Treating - Remus(1) Patton(2) Emile(3) Remy(4) ???(5) Logan(6) Roman(7) Virgil(8) Diva(9) Duke(10) Prince(11) Picani(12) Logic(13)  Deceit(14) ???(15)  -2nd person pov. -You’ve been trick or treating at the Sanders Side’s homes for as long as you can remember, but this year things get a bit more…complicated.

The Interview: Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4 Part 5 -A normal day at StoryTime! Inc. takes an unexpected turn when Logan goes to investigate why his coworkers have made a bet using Crofters as the prize.

Virgil’s Interview: -It’d been his dream to work for StoryTime! since he was a kid, and now finally, Virgil may be able to make it come true. Note: Virgil’s pov of Chapter 3 in The Interview.

The Olive Branch -They used to celebrate Christmas Eve without Anxiety there to ruin things. But this year Roman plans to change that.

These Black Wings -An hour ago Patton had been loved, wanted, celebrated. Now? He’s on the run for his life thanks to the large black wings that sprouted from his back.

Chimney Sweep -Sure. It’s great to be able to see visions of missing children…but being able to find them still alive is another thing entirely.

Meeting Romeo -A Prequel to A Work of Art. -It was unfortunate really, but someone had to tell the Romeo standing on the street that his Juliet he’d come to listen to day after day no longer lived in the apartment complex. It might as well be Virgil.

Dance with Me -Patton’s never had a father figure to bring to his ballet class for Valentine’s Day like all the other kids before. But this year…he might.

A Midnight Conversation -All Virgil expected when he stepped out onto the balcony was to have a quiet moment to himself. Note: Virgil’s pov of ch 2 of White Lies.

Warm Fuzzies -Two Sentence Prompt: Remy thought that he didn’t deserve love, not after everything he’s done. But, when Emile walked through the door to room 127, Remy’s heart skipped an unexpected beat.

A Shadowling’s Happiness  -Two Sentence Prompt: “Where the hell are you going!?” “To the subconscious,  and you can’t stop me.”

Scales- Prologue  Chapter 1   Chapter 2   Chapter 3  Chapter 4  Chapter 5  Epilogue -Deceit hadn’t expected his absence from the Mindscape to be noticed by the others…until Logic knocked on his door.

Mother’s Day -Janus has never liked Mother’s Day.

Wanted -Remus knew one thing for sure. No one would ever want to Want him.

To The Moon - A Vague AU Prompt. -This wasn’t at all how Patton expected their wedding night to go.

The New Hire- Roman has never known his brother, Logan, to break a promise. Until now. Note: Roman’s pov of Chapter 4 in The Interview. 

Be My Dad- A Vague AU Prompt -Janus has no interest in being a parental figure to a kid, but trying to convince the universe of that is another thing entirely.

Moonshot-  Was it too much for Logan to ask to have just one date not revolve around sports talk?

The Sweater- Emile had said he was making a sweater for a friend. Only he neglected to tell Remy that this friend wasn’t exactly…well…human.

October ThirST -After seventy years of searching for his Soulblood, Virgil is highly doubtful he’ll find them tonight.

Lemon Drops -Patton just wanted to go somewhere where he wouldn’t be judged, wouldn’t disappoint…wouldn’t…screw up another relationship. (Takes place after SvS Redux)

The Path: A Promise Kept -sequel to The Path: A Tale of Trick or Treating -Trick or Treating may be cancelled this year, but that won’t stop you from keeping a Promise.

The Chaos Twins -prequel moment to The Sweater -Everyone has their hobbies, though Emile wishes his roommates’ hobbies were a little less…explosive.

On the Run -prequel moment to the Sweater -When life gives you an escape attempt, you run as fast and as far as you can to get away.

Nitemear -It’s not considered running away if you’re merely trying to find a more defensible position.

The Key is Confidence -Confidence. That was the key, his father had told him, to getting away with anything.

Among the Branches -Getting woken up at the crack of dawn by your landlord can’t be a good thing. Fractured Trust- Trust is a tender thing, easily made…and just as easily broken. Written for the Two sentence prompt -"Why don't you trust me Roman?" Patton asked tightening his grip on Roman's shirt. "P-Patton I-" Roman stuttered out fearfully.

A Mini’s Pep Talk -It shouldn’t surprise Roman, at this point, that on top of an already no good really really bad day he ends up getting attacked by another Side’s Mini-Me while looking for his own. (Takes place after SVS Redux)

The (K)nightmare -They say that the brain uses Dreams to help understand and solve problems one faces in the waking world.

Demon Comfort -Part 1  Part 2  Part 3 -Lurking under a Human’s bed should be downright dull for a Demon of Logan’s rank. And yet…he can’t help but be intrigued by his human charge.

First Contact - Things would be so much easier if only their human, Virgil, would talk to them.

Meeting Virgil (5x1) - Part 1  Part 2  Part 3 -Five times Remy tried to give Virgil a child and the one time he succeeded. A Special Delivery Prequel. 

Catch Me (If You Can) - Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 -Remy would not allow himself to be seen as needy and helpless in front of the general masses. He had an image to uphold. One of perfect health, snarky comebacks, and general sassiness. He didn’t get sick.

Beneath the Moon - Part 1  Part 2 Part 3 -After all the research he’d done, after all the signs he’d been experiencing. Logan needed someone to tell him he wasn’t crazy. And Roman…Roman had always been the one most likely to believe in the fantastical, the impossible, the…supernatural.

Hello Darkness (My Old ... Friend?) - Part 1  -Is it possible to search for something…for someone…when you don’t even remember that they’re missing?

Dance Break! -Roman suddenly jumped up, a sparkle in his eyes, as he turned, seeking out the first person he can find and holding out his hand. “Dance with me!” (Written with @kieraelieson)​

Christmas Eve -Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5 -Of all the barriers that Janus expected to have to overcome in order to get his son a pet for Christmas, encountering his Ex, Roman, working in the pet store had never once crossed his mind.

Code: Blanket -Part 1  Part 2 -A friendship doesn’t stop just because one person decides to act like a dick. Especially when said dick is obviously in trouble.

An Unconventional Defeat -Patton knew that heroes started out young, far younger than villains ever did. But this young?

Into the Fray -It wasn’t like he shouldn’t have expected this. It seemed like any plan involving him and Virgil had a tendency to well…go astray.

No Longer Alone -Growing up in isolation away from people has been all that Virgil’s ever known. That changes today.

A Restless Christmas Eve -Even if it had been five years since he’d appeared in the real world, this still felt like it should have been a Virgil problem and not a Deceit one. He’d never had issues staying asleep before. Let alone ending up wide awake, feeling like he needed to–to–just move. Get out. Because of a stupid storm.

Out Camping - Part 1  Part 2 -A Father and Son Camping Trip.

Sanders Sides Art Portals AU-  Deceit  Roman  Patton Logan  Virgil

[commentaryvorg]

If you could change anything from Kaito's character arc in V3, what would you change?

Honestly? The short answer is nothing.

Kaito's character arc is fantastically crafted. There are so many tiny, seemingly-innocuous lines and moments that actually serve a vital purpose in either showing us what's going on in Kaito's head despite him never talking about it, or in pushing his arc along further, all of which I had so much fun talking about throughout the commentary. Granted, a lot of it is subtle and difficult to spot - but then it should be, considering how much Kaito tries to hide his issues. When you look for it, though, it is very deliberately there and not meaninglessly ambiguous at all. There's not a single part of Kaito's arc where I'm thinking “this was written badly”; even his phobia, as much as I'm sad that it gives Kaito less screentime and less being-himself in chapter 3, serves multiple purposes for the story and for Kaito's arc. Kaito's writers are the best and I adore how much care and attention they put into writing him.

I've seen a fair few people, presumably fans of Kaito, say “Kaito deserved better”, and... they're wrong. Well, unless they mean it in a purely in-universe sense, in which case of course he did, but then so did everyone, that's kind of the point. But if they mean it in an out-universe sense, in that they think Kaito deserved a better story for how good of a character he is? No! Kaito's story is amazing. He is the best-written character in this game and got absolutely everything he deserved, narratively speaking. I genuinely believe this with all of my heart. If other people don't see it, then they aren't looking hard enough - which is understandable, but also a shame when those people are fans of Kaito who presumably want to enjoy his story as much as they can. I just want to take all of these people and show them my commentary so that they can realise just how good Kaito's arc really is and love him even more like he deserves. (And I am endlessly thrilled that the commentary does seem to have had that kind of effect on some people!)

Obviously I would also love to see a story in which Kaito learns that it's okay to show weakness to his sidekicks, completely untangles his horrendous double-standard for heroes and begins to have healthy, mutually-supportive relationships with his friends. But... that was never this story. This is a story in which Kaito's messed-up view of what it means to be a hero literally gets him killed while all but destroying his sense of self-worth in the process, yet he still manages to keep fighting and make at least some kind of difference for his friends anyway, because he still is a hero despite what he might believe about himself. And that's also a fantastic story to tell!

It's kind of like something I've also considered about Ryoma. It would have been quite possible to tell a story in which Ryoma overcomes his issues and finds a reason to live and survives, and I'd have loved a story like that with him, because Ryoma is great and deserves to be happy. But the story of how he didn't manage to overcome his issues and tragically died because of them is also a compelling story that it's possible to tell with Ryoma's character - and, well, someone had to be chapter 2's victim. With characters as ripe with potential as Kaito, or Ryoma, or really any complex and well-written character in anything, there's so many different and equally compelling stories that could be told with them. But you can't tell all of those stories at once, and that's okay.

(That's why it's great that we have fanwork, to explore all of those other possible stories that couldn't be told in canon!)

With all that said, since this is about Kaito, you know I don't want to just leave it at the (very elaborated-upon) short answer. So here's a few things I thought of anyway that I might want to change if I could - all of which are really very minor nitpicks that barely matter in the grand scheme of things.

The absolute first thing I'd do is remove those four-ish lines in which Kaito is vaguely sexist in a way that is provably out-of-character for him. Gone. Expunged. Never there. Suddenly, magically, there is no longer a portion of the fandom that believes that Kaito is supposed to be sexist, and we literally only changed like four lines of his dialogue. Funny, that.

I'd also want to slightly change the parts where Kaito freaks out in a too-extreme way over ghosts once his phobia's been revealed. Not only is it not really quite in character for him to overreact that badly when he'd be doing his best to hide it, it also comes across like Kaito's phobia is being played for comedy. Which it shouldn’t be. He is literally mentally ill; that's not a joke.

These are the only two aspects of the way in which Kaito's written that I find actively bad in any appreciable way. And, yeah, they're really minor things that don't have anything to do with his actual character arc. That's kind of my point here!

...Though, admittedly, the part where Maki punches Kaito after he clings to her during his phobia-overreaction does actually play a small role in his character arc in that it seems to shift him into beginning to freak out more about his physical illness instead. Hm. Not sure what I'd do about that.

In terms of things I might change that are more meaningful and relevant to Kaito's arc, as I've said, there's really nothing that's actively bad at all. Rather, we're just getting into things where I'd maybe want to add a little bit more on top of what's already there.

Kokichi Doing The Thing in trial 4 - aka, repeatedly heaping insincere praise onto Shuichi in what's really a transparent attempt to jab at Kaito's jealousy and inferiority complex - should have continued for longer than it did instead of being weirdly confined to one specific quarter of the trial. There are plenty of moments after that that would have been perfectly good opportunities for it! And yes, this is absolutely part of Kaito's arc, shush. Not that this would have significantly affected how Kaito would respond or make his breakdown any more spectacular than it already was, mind you, because Kokichi's jabs at Kaito were not nearly as important as Kokichi wanted them to be.

Then there's the part in chapter 5 where, after being kidnapped and offscreen for a while, Kaito has evidently become okay with Shuichi being more of a hero than him and can just be openly proud of him again. There's no specific evidence indicating why this happened, even though it's a pretty important shift for Kaito. This was the only part of Kaito's arc that I speculated about in the commentary without having anything concrete to back up what I think went on there. So if possible, I'd like to add some hints at that.

...That's easier said than done, though, since Kaito gets so little screentime at this point in the story for unavoidable plot reasons, is still not willing to directly talk about his issues, and was never even really consciously aware of his toxic double-standard for heroes that was the root of this whole problem that he's finally begun to fix. It's entirely possible that this is something the writers already wanted to hint at more than they did, but they just couldn't find a way to plausibly do so in that situation. This also still wouldn't be me changing anything about Kaito's arc, just making part of it a bit more easy to notice and figure out.

Lastly - though this isn't even strictly part of Kaito's arc - I'd love to have Shuichi acknowledge more than he does that Kaito had been suffering, and for him to reflect on that and wish that Kaito hadn't been so selfless (just like he did at one point with Kaede!). Obviously I wouldn't want to make him more aware of it for most of Kaito being alive, because that'd change too much and because Shuichi's obliviousness is part of the excruciating tragedy of it all. But after hearing at the end that Kaito really was sick and dying all along, and that Kaito was jealous of him, Shuichi should have been able to recognise at least some of Kaito's vulnerability in hindsight. Having some reflection on that at the end of chapter 5 or at some point during chapter 6 would be lovely to underline and draw attention to what Kaito's story was really about from Kaito's perspective. It might even prompt more of the fandom to actually realise this and notice what an amazing arc Kaito had, which sure would be nice.

...In fact, there's a very small window of time in which Shuichi could have plausibly acknowledged this kind of thing a little more than he did while Kaito was still alive to hear it and potentially benefit from it. So, actually, now that I think of it: the one change I'd make that'd have any real impact on Kaito's arc at all? It'd be this.

[chickensarentcheap]

Best Part of Me -Chapter 5

Warnings: none

Tagging: @innerpaperexpertcloud​, @c-a-v-a-l-r-y​, @alievans007​, @thunderintheshadows​

“So how did you end up here?” Salena asks, as they lounge on her back deck, sipping sparkling water infused with fresh fruit and enjoying the view and the sound of the ocean. With a steady wind blowing though, the waves are impressive, perfect surfing conditions.  Mac and Stanlee are asleep and curled up together in the sun while Declan is tucked tightly into the new neighbour’s side, comfortably napping with his head resting against her. “In Australia?”

 Esme settles back into her chair, Addie -awake and content- laying along her arm.  “My husband’s Australian.”

 “But how did you end up here? You’re obviously not from Oz.”

 “I’m actually a long way from home. Well, what used to be my home. I’m originally from Colorado.”

 “From the snow and the mountains to this,” Salena nods towards the ocean. “That’s quite the change in scenery.”

 “I’ll take this over the snow and mountains any day of the week. We used to live here. We actually met here. My husband used to live in Kimberley. We got married here, our oldest was born here. We used to live just outside of Sydney.”

 Salena gently combs her fingers through Declan’s hair. “And you moved back to the States?”

 “Because of work. My husband’s work.  He was contracted out a lot. Constantly travelling. So we thought it would be a good idea to be closer to my family, in case I ever needed something while he was out of town. He just thought it would be a good idea to have people close by. Just in case.”

 Her neighbour nods. “How did you two even meet? Colorado and Australia are pretty far apart. And on two completely different sides of the world.”

 “We were working for the same company and got contracted out to the same job.”  It’s a vague explanation, but it’s the truth.

 “What kind of company? Sorry!” she laughs, and Declan gives a small jump but doesn’t waken. “I’m not trying to be nosy. I’m just trying to get a read on you. You’re a hard person to read. Has anyone ever told you that?”

 “I may have heard it once or twice,” Esme admits. Or a dozen. A side effect of the job, she supposes. Years of pretending to be someone she wasn’t to get what she wanted ….and what others needed…out of people. Being herself had never been an option with Mark; he was too busy trying to tear her down and turn her into something and someone she wasn’t. It had taken a lot of work, and a phenomenal amount of patience, on Tyler’s part to get her to be herself -her true self- with him. In the same way she’d had to work long and hard at breaking all his walls down.

 “If it’s a trust thing…”

 “It’s not that. I mean it is,” Esme attempts to explain. “In a way. It’s not something that comes easily to me. The job I was in…the other people who were in it…it was complicated, and they were complicated. It’s engrained in me. Not connecting with people. Which is really sad and pathetic, I know.”

 “It doesn’t sound sad or pathetic,” Salena assures her. “It sounds like someone who’s used to getting hurt.”

 “That’s part of it, I guess. My ex-husband was a complete and utter dick. Abusive in every way you can imagine. When I got away from him, I swore I was done with men. That I’d never again trust one, let alone get married again. Well, I think it’s obvious that didn’t last.”

 Salena laughs at that.

 “It was private security,” her eyes are on the infant in her arms, a soft smile on her face as she uses a fingertip to push the thick, dark tresses off of Addie’s forehead. “What we were contracted out to do. That’s how we met. Through work.”

 It’s not that simple of course; it wasn’t as innocent as two people connecting at the water cooler or making eyes at one another across a meeting room. It is much more complicated. Twisted, even. But it’s definitely not the kind of love story to be telling the neighbour the first time you meet her. Not to mention Tyler would lose his mind if he found out she was telling a total stranger the details of their old life.

 “And you just sort of clicked, huh? That sounds cute. Kind of romantic, even.”

 Esme laughs. “It was far from cute or romantic. Let’s just say that lust was the driving influence and leave it that. He was pretty hard to resist. He still is.”  

 It makes her smile; that even after six years and five kids, even the simplest of kiss or look from him can still take her breath away.

 “So you ended up hooking up through work, got married, started off in Australia and ended up Colorado.”

 Esme nods and sips her drink. “Then he came into some money and was able to retire and we decided to come back here. We figured it was the best place to raise our family and grow old together. Somewhere quiet and fairly secluded. Safe.”

 “You guys have a hell of a spot, that’s for sure. Definitely perfect for a family. I remember when it went up for sale. I took a look at it but was way to big just for Stanny and I. Not to mention it was way out of my price range. But it’s an incredible place.”

 “We love it. It’s everything we could have possibly wanted.  Or even dreamed of having. I wish we’d come back sooner. It would have avoided a lot of drama and solved a lot of problems.”

 “Well what’s the saying? Hindsight is twenty twenty? No sense looking back. Just keeping looking forward. Mind you, it took me a long time to practice what I preach.  I didn’t make a lot of good decisions myself. With my personal life.”

 Esme moves the baby to her chest; pressing a kiss to her daughter’s temple before placing a palm on the back of her head for support, then gently guiding it down to her shoulder, other hand softly patting her on her diapered bum.  “Bad relationship?”

 “Same as you. Bad ex-husband. Mine wasn’t abusive, but he had addiction issues. I tried for three years to help him. But you can’t help anyone that won’t help themselves. No matter how much you love them and want to save them.”

 “Some people can’t be saved,” Esme reasons, and Salena nods in agreement. “I learned that the hard way. And I’m sorry you had to, too.”

 “It’s nice to find someone that ‘gets it’.  That knows what it’s like to live with someone like that. How it isn’t as easy to get away like most people think. Don’t they think we would if we could? Get the hell out? If it was that simple, wouldn’t we have left a long time ago?”

 “I would have left the second Mark started his shit.  The very first time he ever raised his hand to me. But I thought I loved him and that we were meant to be and all that other stupid shit we believe at first.  I thought I could help him and change him and that everything would be great. And the worse it got, the more I thought I could help. I guess I thought it made me a failure if I just gave up and walked away. Not to mention I have a mother that put that crap in my head but that’s besides the point.”

 “Are we sisters from another mister?” Salena gives a dry laugh. “Because our mothers sound one in the same.”

 “I can’t believe I actually thought he was a decent person at first. I mean, looking back at it? The signs were all there that he was a dick! But I was young, and I thought him being controlling and protective was just his way of showing he loves me. I was so goddamn stupid. It’s infuriating! Especially now that I know what real love feels like.”

 “And what does it feel like?”

 “It’s hard to describe. You just feel it. Every time they smile at you or they do something so unexpected and sweet for you. Or when you’re feeling gross and ugly and all you have to do is look at the way they’re looking at you. Or how they make you feel like you’re the most important person in their entire world. I know that sounds like a bunch of bullshit, and I always thought it was too. Until I actually started experiencing it.”

 She’s never thought about it before. All the things…big and small…that remind her every day that just how loved she is.  The soft forehead kisses or the ones to the temple. The tight, strong hugs that feels as if they’re capable of solving any problem.  Or how he always covers her up with a blanket if she manages a nap on the couch or outside in one of the recliners. How he���ll get up in the middle of the night even she is the feeding the baby; fetching her a snack and something to drink and then staying awake with her until Addie is ready for sleep again.

 It’s all the thing you don’t realize are happening until you sit back and take stock of them. Those tender moments that you’d never expect from a big, strong, and often intimidating man.

 “Well, you’re lucky,” Salena says. “Very lucky.”

 “I am,” Esme smiles. “I don’t think I realize it often enough. You sort of take it for granted.  That they’ll just be there doing these things.”

 “Until one day they’re not.”

 Esme nods. She’s already come close to that. Mere minutes from away from not having the life that she does now. Had the ending in Dhaka gone different, she would have been back in Colorado, alone, when she was expecting Millie. Her daughter would have never known her father, and none of the kids after her would even exist. And it’s a sobering thought.

 “I hope I get to experience it one day,” Salena muses. “That kind of love.”

 “I never thought I’d find it. I’d give up that decent men even existed. It happens when you least expect it, trust me. I did not take that job thinking I was going to meet my future husband. Or that I’d end up with five kids.”

 “Are you going to make it an even half dozen?”

 “Oh hell no,” Esme laughs. “We are done. We’ve closed up shop. Five is enough. And first, after the twins, we thought three was enough. Apparently, we changed our minds. Twice.”

 “I don’t know what your other kiddos look like, but this guy…” she smiles down at Declan. “…is a cutie pie. I could just sit here snuggling with him all day, I swear. What a cuddle bug.”

 “Well you’re more than welcome to borrow him from time to time. Because this momma needs a break some days.”

 “Anytime you need that break; you just send him this way. Because he is just too freaking precious.”

 “He probably needs a break too. He’s a little jealous of his baby sister. And his big sister and brothers like to torment him. They’re going to have to be careful. Because he’s going to be huge and strong and lay them all out one day.”

 “He’s definitely a big boy,” Salena agrees. “But so goddamn cute. I mean, look at those eyelashes. They go on for days.”

 “He gets those from daddy. All the kids have them.”

 “I used to run a day care,” she says.  “So I have the experience. I’m not joking when I say you can bring him here. He’d be in good hands.”

 “I may just take you up on that. It’s fine when my husband’s home because he doesn’t think twice about jumping in and doing it all himself.  These two alone can wear me out. Never mind when the other three aren’t in school.”

 “Well think about it. I’m more than willing to tame little man off your hands when you need me to.”

 “I will,” Esme promises. “Think about it.”

 Salena smiles, then leans down to press a kiss to Declan’s forehead. “I do I hope I find it one day. That love you’re talking about.”

 “You will,” Esme assures her. “When you’re not even looking for it.”

 ****

 It’s four thirty by the time they arrive home; covered in sweat and grime after a long day of working hard in the sun.  Ovi had fallen asleep only five minutes into the drive home; snoring lightly, head resting against his window. Now Tyler nudges him awake; gently, so as not to startle him enough to jump clear out of his skin. He’s been having sleep issues for years as well; night terrors, bouts of insomnia, easily frightened and startled if woken up too abruptly.  And he raises his head from the glass, blinking several times as he tries to orientate himself with his surroundings; a frown on his face, a hand rubbing at his stick neck.

 “What we talked about this morning,” Ovi begins, as he climbs out of the truck and follows Tyler around to the tailgate.  “About the whole job thing.”

 “I thought we weren’t going to talk about that anymore,” Tyler toes off his dirty work boots, dropping them into the bed of the pickup. “In fact…” he yanks his t-shirt over his head, using it to wipe the sweat from his forehead and the back of his neck. “…I thought I said we’re not talking about it again.”

 “I didn’t mean to upset you,” Ovi says in way of an apology. “Or bring up bad memories.”

 “Yeah? So why’d you even bring up then? Did you think I was going to be okay with it?”  There’s a gym bag with a change of clothes in the bed of the truck, and he pulls out a tank top and slips it on. Then steps out of his filthy cargos and climbs into a pair of board short. “You thought I’d say it was a good idea?”

 “I thought you’d at least listen,” Ovi admits.  “That you of all people would understand.”

 “Understand what?” Tyler gathers up the dirty clothes, bunching then and rolling them together before heading up the driveway. “That you’re a fucking idiot for even thinking about it?”

 “You thought about it once. You went into it.”

 “Yeah, because I was a fucking idiot.”

 “If you’d never gotten into the job, you never would have met Esme,” Ovi points out.

 “She has nothing to do with this. Don’t bring her into your bullshit.”

 “It kind of has everything to do with it. Without the job, there’d be no Esme. And without Esme, there’d be no kids, so…”

 “Don’t use my wife and my kids as an excuse for making a shitty ass decision. Don’t use them to justify something stupid. I’m one of the lucky ones. I managed to stay alive. I managed to get the hell out and have a normal life. Or whatever normal is. Do you know how many guys actually manage that? To survive? To get out and have a wife and kids?”

 Ovi shakes his head.

 “Ten percent. If that. And the ones who do get married and start having kids and are still in the job? Most are divorced. Most don’t ever see their kids. Why the hell would you want that for yourself?”

 “It would be a good opportunity.”

 He tosses the dirty work clothes into the laundry basket that sits next to the door that leads into the house. “A good opportunity for what? Getting shot in the fucking head?”

 “To prove myself.”

 “What the hell does going into the job prove? Other than you’re an idiot. I can’t believe we’re even having this conversation. There’s nothing to prove. You know what kind of guys go into the job? The ones who don’t have the fucking brains to do anything else. Or the ones who like to kill or get off on it. The ones who have nothing left to live for and don’t care if they catch a bullet or not.  I was that guy. That’s why I did it. Because I was too much of a coward to pull the trigger myself, so I figured why not just let someone else do it.”

 “And the money…”

 “Fuck the money. It was never really about that. That was just a bonus if I managed to survive. You are too good for this. For the job. Way too good. And you deserve more than that. A better life. Don’t get caught up in that bullshit. Don’t end up like me; fucked in the head. You think I want to be like this? Have these issues? Have to drug myself up every day just to function? You think this is how I want to live? I can’t go back and change things. I can’t take back all the ways I hurt my wife. All the lies I told her, the promises I never kept, the times I left her when she needed me the most. I fucked up. I should have left the job after Dhaka and never went back.”

 “But this time would be different,” Ovi insists. “We’d be working together. We’d be in charge.”

 “And what the hell do you know about the job? Other than what you saw in Dhaka. Name one thing you know about it that didn’t come from watching me.”

 “I don’t know…” Ovi shrugs, scratching at the back of his head.

 “You know shit about that job. Keep it that way.  It’s a horrible fucking life. Don’t do that yourself. And especially don’t do that to Chloe.”

 “She thinks it’s a good idea.  That it’s something I should try.”

 “Then you go back to Chloe and you tell her I said she’s just as stupid as you are.”

 “Where are you going?” Ovi asks, when Tyler opens the door to step inside the house. “We’re not done talking about this.”

 “Yeah, we are. Or at least I am. Now I’m going inside, and I’m going to kiss my wife and spend time with my kids. Don’t bring this up again.”

 And with that he disappears into the house, slamming the door behind him.

 ****

She’s on the back patio, pulling clean laundry from a massive wicker basket that sits on the ground beside her. Folding clothes of all sizes and neatly arranging them -according to person- on the table. And she looks up at him as he steps through the sliding door, flashing that smile that still manages to make him weak in the knees even six years later.

 “Hey,” she cheerfully greets. “I thought maybe you wouldn’t home until later. How did…?”

 Placing his hands on the sides of her face, he kisses her. Long, slow, and deep. Until she’s standing her tip toes and her body is leaning into his. He’d been dying to do it all day; since he conversation with his father. After he’d talked about just how lucky he was to have someone like her. Not just as his wife and the mother of his children, but as his best friend, partner, lover, and confidant. The one person in the world that knows all his deepest and darkest secrets yet never judges or condemns him for them.  Who he can be himself with, even at his weakest and most vulnerable.  Who knows what kind of fucked up mess he is and still sticks around, giving him chance after chance.

She gives a long sigh of approval when the moment ends, her forearms resting against his chest as she smiles up at him.  “Mmmm…what was that for?”

 He pushes his hands through her hair, letting them fall onto her shoulders and down her back, coming to rest on her hips. “I need a reason to kiss my wife?”

 “That wasn’t your usual ‘hey, I’m home’ kind of kiss. That was something entirely different. Kiss me like that again.”

 He obliges; hands tightening their grip on her and pulling her against him, her palms sliding up his chest and over his shoulders and settling at back of his neck as she eagerly returns the kiss. Giggling and pulling away when his hands slid down to her ass.

 “Okay…now that’s just wrong,” she scolds. “That is taking things way too far and you know it. Why do you insist on torturing me like this?”

 “Believe me, I’m torturing myself just as much.”

 “If you want to call two blow jobs in one night torture….”

 He grins, hands back on her hips as he presses a kiss to her forehead. “I thought I showed you how grateful I was. Twice. Or did you forget about that part? Me returning the favour?”

 “Oh trust me, you don’t forget orgasms like that. And can we stop talking about this? Because you smell so good right now and you’re all sweaty and dirty and just when I think my hormones cannot get any more out of control then they are already are…” she places her hands on his chest and tries to push him away; he’s all rock solid muscle and doesn’t even budge. “…you need to step back like ten feet before I just say to hell with what the doctor said and jump you right here.”

 “I probably wouldn’t stop you,” he admits, and then laughs when she reaches for the waist of his shorts. “But, it’s not a good idea.”

 “You’re the worst,” she pouts dramatically and returns to the laundry.

 “The absolute worst,” he agrees, and kisses her temple before journeying over to the bar fridge in the corner, taking out two bottles of water, uncapping both and handing one to her. “Where’s the kids?” he asks, as he drops into the chair across from her.

 “The baby is in her crib asleep and Chloe took the rest of your feral offspring down to the water.”

 “Chloe, huh?”

 “What’s the matter with Chloe?? You never had a problem with her watching the kids before. I thought you liked her.”

 Tyler shrugs. “I can take her or leave her.”

 “Well I think Ovi would appreciate a little more enthusiasm from you. Dd you he tell you that they’ve been looking at rings?”

 His eyes narrow, bottle of pressed against his lips. “What kind of rings?”

 “Engagement rings. I guess they’ve been talking. About the next step.”

 “He just turned twenty.”

 “I know,” Esme sighs. “But they’ve been talking about it. I told him that if he’s going to ask, they should make it a long engagement. Not to rush into actually getting married. I mean, they’re already living together so they’re getting the opportunity to see what marriage is like in a sense.”

 “Don’t encourage them.”

 “I’m not encouraging it. If he’s going to get her a ring, he’s going to do it regardless of what either of us say. It’s not we can tell him what to do.”

 Tyler scowls. “Why the hell not?”

 “Because he’s twenty years old, that’s why. He’s an adult.”

 “Barely.”

 “Regardless, he’s is a man now and he’s going to do what he wants. And apparently what he wants is to marry her. Hopefully later, rather than sooner. We can’t stop them, Tyler. It’s going to happen whether we think it’s a bad idea or not.”

 “It’s a fucking terrible idea,” he growls. “I know you like her, but…”

 “It’s not that I like her or dislike her. It’s that I love Ovi like he’s my own and I just want him to be happy. And if Chloe is who makes him happy…”

 “How does he even know?” Tyler challenges. “She’s like the second girl he’s ever been with for fuck sakes. How does he know there’s not someone out there that might make him even happier?”

 “You were only the third guy I’d ever been with and I knew you made me happy,” she points out.

 “That’s not the same thing and you know it.  We were both in our thirties when we met. We were old enough to know exactly what…and who…we wanted. He’s barely out of his teens and he wants to get married? Fuck that.”

 Esme smirks. “Is your problem with Chloe or marriage itself?”

 “If I had a problem with marriage do you think I would have even asked you? Or stuck around for six years? And if you even think of saying something like ‘you stick around for the kids’ I will lose my shit.”

 “Okay, you are getting a little too wound up. I meant it as a joke. I obviously know you haven’t stuck around just for the kids. Just like I already know this is about Chloe. Why’d you ever agree to let her move here with me if you didn’t like her?”

 “Because I knew he wouldn’t come with us if I didn’t.”

 “Because you want him to be happy, right?”

 “Of course I do. But I also wanted him where he belongs. With us. He wasn’t ready to live away from us and you know it. He’s still not. Yet you think it’s perfectly fine that he gets married?”

 “Tyler, I don’t want to fight about this.”

 “I’m not…” he sighs heavily, then lowers his voice and softens his tone. “…I’m not fighting. I just think it’s bullshit. It’s way too soon and he’s nowhere near ready for that kind of thing.”

 “Which…” she steps around to his side of the table, softly rubbing his shoulders before curling her arms around his neck and perching herself on his thigh. “…is why I told him if he does ask her, he needs to take the next part slow.  That he doesn’t need to rush things. That he should just enjoy being engaged and planning things. And he said he would. So…” she kisses his cheek. “…why are you so wound up over this?”

 “I’m not wound up.”

 “This bulging vein in the side of your neck…” she runs a fingertip down it. “….says you are wound up. What’s going on? All of a sudden you have a hate on for Chloe? I thought you liked her.”

 “I never said I liked her. I said I was okay with her. There’s a difference.”

 “Well can you at least rein it in a bit for tonight? Because I sort of…kind of…invited them for dinner and…”

 “Oh for fuck sake,” he grumbles.

 “…and I thought we could cook down on the beach. Nice and casual. Relaxed. And judging by the tension in your shoulders, you could use something casual and relaxed. Are you okay? This it not all about Ovi and Chloe.”

 “It’s just been a long day,” Tyler reasons. “A lot of hours out in the sun and I’m tired and sore and now I have to play nice with Ovi’s…whatever the hell she is.”

 “If you play nice for me, I will play nice for you. Later. When all of the kids are asleep.”

 He smirks. “Are you trying to bribe me?”

 “I don’t know. Does bribery work on you?”

 “You’ve used it before on me and it’s worked,” he points out. “You really do have all the power. You know exactly how to get what you want.”

 “Oh baby, you don’t know the full extent of my power,” she teases, and kisses him, her fingers combing through his hair, nails digging lightly into his scalp and dragging all the way down to the nape of his neck. “Are you okay? You seem a little…I don’t know…on edge.”

 “I’m fine. It was just a really long day. I’m tired, I stink…”

 “I like your stink,” she nestles her face into the side of his neck. “…and it’s not a stink. It’s just how you smell when you’ve been working hard. It’s…you.”

 “Fuck you’re weird.”

 “But you love me.”

 “Yeah,” he rubs her back. “I do. For some goddamn reason.”

 “Did it go that bad today? At your dad’s? I thought you would have said something when you first got home, and I didn’t want to pressure you into talking about.”

 “Things went fine. We got everything done we needed to.”

 “That’s not what I’m asking, and you know it. Did you actually talk to him?”

 Tyler nods.

 “And? How bad is he? The dementia?”

 “Well he told his nurse that I was his brother who died twenty years ago if that’s telling you anything.”

 “I’m sorry, baby,” she nuzzles her nose against his neck and softly strokes the hair at the back of his head. “I know we were told it was bad, but it’s still a blow to see it for yourself.”

 “I felt nothing. When I saw him. When I talked to him. I didn’t feel sad, I didn’t feel pity, I didn’t feel regret. I felt nothing.”   Fuck, it sounds horrible to his own ears. Has his own mental health actually come to this? That he’s become emotionally absent? That he just has nothing left to give anyone else? Is it really possible to be that empty inside and still be alive?  “How fucked up is that? How fucked up am I? That I felt nothing? What the hell is wrong with me?”

 “Nothing is wrong with you, Tyler.  You don’t owe him anything. Not after everything he put you through. What he put your mother through. You have nothing but pain and bad memories because of him. You’re not fucked up. You’re just…hurt.”

 “I didn’t even feel that. And I thought I would. Or that I’d be angry. And I wasn’t. I just sat there. I just sat there and talked to him and that was it.”

 “What did you talk about? Just regular stuff or…?”

 “A whole bunch of things. Us. The kids.  He seemed happy that we named the baby after my mum. That I finally did something right with my life in his eyes.”

 “You’ve done a lot right and you know. Just because he can’t see those things, doesn’t mean they never happened. You know what they are. I know what they are. That’s all that matters.”

 He nods in agreement.

 “And you can say you feel nothing, but I know you do. I know there’s a lot of anger there. And you have every right to feel that.  I just don’t want it destroying you. You don’t have to hold that in, you know. It’s okay to be pissed off. You had a shitty childhood. He made your life hell. No one will judge you for being angry.”

 “I just need to go in the gym and beat the shit out of the heavy bag for half an hour and I’ll be fine.”

 “Then do it,” she encourages, pecking his lips before tousling his hair and sliding off his lap. “If that’s what will make you feel better.”

 “Well there’s something else that would make feel even better than that, but we can’t do that yet, so…” he stands up and lays a hand on the side of her face, kissing her softly before drawing her into his arms once more; one hand on the back of her head, the other on the small of her back.  “Thank you.”

 “For what?”

 He drops a kiss on the top of her head and squeezes her tightly. “Everything.”

[ahtohallan-calling]

chapter 9 of it’s always ourselves we find is here!

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8

[kristanna / m / modern au / coworkers & enemies to lovers ;) ]

It was a marvel, really, how quickly she returned to him: his Anna, with all her ungraceful laughter and bright smiles and brighter eyes.

He thought of her as such not because he dared to think he had any real claim to her, but rather because this Anna, the one who had let go of his hand only to eat her lunch, was the one he’d grown so familiar with and fond of over the past months, the one who drove him absolutely insane in more ways than he could count.

Currently, she was in the midst of explaining in excruciating detail precisely how awful the two dates she’d been on with Hans had been, and Kristoff found himself laughing so hard his sides were beginning to hurt. 

“Seriously, Kris, it’s not funny,” she said between giggles of her own. “I ruined my tights crawling out the window, and I’d just bought them.”

“Sorry,” he managed to gasp. “Just-- I’m trying to picture how you even managed to get up on the ledge--”

“Shut up, you great big brute, not all of us can be the size of a tree.”

“Sorry,” he said again, though he wasn’t at all. “Just-- was it really that bad that you had to climb out of the bathroom window?”

She grew a little more solemn then. “Yeah, like-- like Hans ordered a salad for me, and said to put the dressing on the side, and of course I scarfed it down like a crazy person since I’d just been hiking all afternoon with my sister, and he was going on and on and on about his vision for the company, and I kept wondering what he’d do if I just reached across the table and stole a piece of his steak.”

Kristoff grew quieter, just watching her as she took a sip of her drink. Her gaze fluttered up to him after a moment, curious. “Cat got your tongue?”

He shifted awkwardly in his seat, weighing his words carefully for fear of using them carelessly again. “Just...wondering why you thought I’d do that to you on purpose.”

“Do what? Say what you did this morning?”

“No-- shit, I’m sorry again for that-- but I meant setting you up with Hans.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Was it really not on purpose?”

“Do you really think I’d do Hans Westergaard a favor like that?”

“A favor, huh?”

“Well,” he stammered, “he’s-- well-- you know how he is with pretty girls.”

A little smile slid onto her face. Please don’t ask me, he thought desperately, please don’t ask me if I think you’re pretty, because I can’t lie to you, Anna, not any more.

She tapped her chin thoughtfully. “So...okay. So from my perspective, it was like...I was in the break room with Jessica and Lissa, and they were trying to get you to ask me.”

“Wait, what?”

“Mhmm. That’s why they were like ‘hey, Kristoff, Anna needs a date to the fundraiser ball, do you know anyone who could take her?’, and then Hans came in--”

“That’s what it was! I didn’t see him, I swear. Sorry, go on.”

“So then why did you say ‘I’m sure Hans is on the lookout’?”

“I was being sarcastic. He brings a new girl to everything. I didn’t mean for him to actually ask you.”

Anna sat back, looking as if she’d just been handed the meaning of the whole universe. “You really didn’t? After the party-- which was awful, by the way, you didn’t miss anything-- I thought you’d set me up for it almost like a prank. And then he asked me out again in front of people, and I couldn’t really say no, so that’s how I ended up on the second one, and after that I was really convinced you hated me.”

Kristoff shook his head, leaning over the table, and said as sincerely as he could, “Anna, even if I did hate you, I wouldn’t wish that rat bastard on my worst enemy.”

She beamed at him so brightly he had a feeling she’d be holding his hand again if there weren’t plates in the way. He wished she would anyway; who cared about getting a little ketchup on your sleeve when a girl like that wanted to touch you?

A sudden thought struck him then. “Wait-- but why did your friends want me to ask you?”

Her cheeks turned a brilliant shade of scarlet. “For reasons.”

“What reasons?”

“Silly ones.”

“Anna,” he cajoled, half-singing her name and wondering in the back of his mind how she’d managed to make him act so...silly. “C’mon, you can tell me. It’s just your favorite worst enemy.”

“You can’t laugh,” she said sternly, her blush darkening. “Promise me.”

“I promise.”

She sighed and slanted her eyes away from him, leveling a determined glare at the shrimp tails on her plate. “Because I told them I thought you were handsome.”

He didn’t know what answer he’d been expecting, but it certainly hadn’t been that. “Seriously? You really thought that?”

She rolled her eyes as she dared to glance back up at him. “Oh, come on, Kristoff, as if you don’t know you’re all…” She waved a hand vaguely. “Big and blonde and. And your face and stuff.”

He wanted to take a long moment to let it sink in; it was almost too much for one day, realizing that Anna not only cared about his opinion, not only seemed to actually sort of like him, not only wanted to keep touching him-- but that she thought he was handsome. “Wow,” he heard himself saying. “I can’t believe it.”

“Okay, okay, well, it’s your turn in the hot seat, mister,” she said grumpily, though the effect was ruined somewhat by the still-red tips of her ears. “Why did you snap at me this morning?”

It was his turn to flush. “It was nothing. I was just-- just in a bad mood.”

“You’re always in a bad mood,” she said, her brows knitting together as she leaned over the table. “Tell me the truth.”

Fuck, that gave him a great view right down the front of her shirt, which definitely was not making this any easier. He tried not to shift too obviously in his seat as he kept his gaze firmly locked on her face. “Just-- one of those...things.”

And now she was reaching for him across the table, concern in her eyes as she settled that little hand over his arm, that little hand that he’d dreamed that morning she’d had wrapped around his cock, for god’s sake, and her voice was so gentle as she said, “Kris, just tell me the truth, please?”

He swallowed hard and shook his head in a last ditch effort to make her back down. She tilted her head to the side, confused, when suddenly understanding dawned in her eyes. “Oh.”

“It wasn’t ‘cause you were there,” he said quickly, although it most definitely had been at least in part because of that. “I promise I’m not a--”

She sat back a little, though she didn’t move her hand. He could tell she was trying to contain her mirth and spare him further embarrassment. “It’s okay. I’ve had boyfriends before, I know how it is.”

“It’s different,” he ground out, feeling his face heat further than he thought was possible. 

He realized suddenly that something else had dawned on her, that her amusement had transformed into realization-- of what, he wasn’t sure he wanted to know. He shifted awkwardly in his seat again, and at last she withdrew her hand, running it absentmindedly through her hair. “Sorry, again,” he muttered, looking anywhere but her eyes.

“It’s okay,” she reassured him. “Seriously. You can’t help it. And you already apologized enough for the other stuff.”

“I still feel bad. Let me make it up to you, let me buy your lunch or something, yeah?”

She waved him away. “Let’s just say you owe me one, maybe I’ll have you drive me to the print shop next time I need to pick up a banner or something.”

He blinked in surprise. “You don’t need a favor to ask me to do that.”

Her eyes softened. “Really?”

All Kristoff could do was nod, feeling grateful that the waiter chose that moment to come by with the check. As he began to do the mental calculations for what he’d have to give up next week to cover both of their meals, Anna said quickly, “We’re splitting it, no matter what he tries to say,” even as he began to fumble for his wallet. 

And damn, if that didn’t make him lo-- like her even more.

---

By the time he emerged from the bathroom, wearing his softest old t-shirt and sweatpants, Anna was already nestled under the blankets, keeping carefully to her side of the pillow wall. A little flutter in his chest accompanied the realization that she’d decided to keep their arrangement from the night before and hadn’t set a pillow between where their faces would be.

He came to a pause by his side of the bed. “Anna?”

“Hmm?” she asked, not looking up from her phone.

“Can I...this pillow here, the one by your shoulder...do you mind if I move that one and use it tonight? Sorry, I know it’s-- well, sharing a bed and all-- but my neck kind of hurts from staring at the screen all day, and--”

She did look up at him, a look of fond amusement on her face. “‘Course. Just don’t go getting fresh with me.”

He huffed out a laugh as he shifted the pillow to his side before climbing in bed next to her, being as careful as he could not to jostle the mattress too much. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

(Except he would. And he had.)

He glanced over at her then, giving himself one last chance to take in the sight of her long, tawny lashes brushing down almost to her freckled cheeks each time she blinked. She noticed him staring and glanced up at him. “What? Have I got something on my face?”

“Are you gonna snore again tonight?” he asked, accompanying the words with an exaggerated wink just to make sure she knew he was joking.

She slid further down the pillows, set her phone on her nightstand with an exaggerated tap, and stretched one final time, arching her back enough he felt his mouth go dry, before turning lazily to him and giving him a smirk. “Depends. Are you gonna say my name in your sleep again?”

For a split second, he could have sworn every moving thing in his body came to a complete halt. Any half-asleep thoughts that had been trailing around his mind collapsed into the terrifying refrain of she knows.

“Anna?”

No response.

“Anna, did I really say that?”

She reached up and flicked off the light, leaving them in complete darkness. “Sweet dreams, big guy.”

He could hear the barely concealed laughter in her voice. Fuck, he was in massive trouble; there was no way he’d ever live this one down or that she’d let it go. He felt like a window fogged with steam, too warm and cloudy-minded as he struggled to come to grips with the fact that she knew he had feelings for her, knew he’d woken up hard because he’d dreamed of her-- and, the realization hitting him like a splash of cold water to the face-- she was still lying in bed beside him.

“Kristoff?”

“Yeah?” he asked, a little too quickly.

“Are you still awake?”

“Obviously.”

“Because you’re worrying you’ll say my name again?”

He swallowed so hard he wondered if she could hear it. And perhaps she could, because a moment later there was a rustling of the sheets, and that now-familiar little hand was resting on his chest as Anna’s fingertips idly traced patterns across the thin white fabric of his t-shirt. “It’s okay, Kris, really,” she said, her voice gentler now. “I thought it was sweet.”

Perhaps he was in less trouble than he’d thought.

He drew in a deep breath. Her hand began to slow, and then to pull away, but before she had entirely lifted it from his chest he set his own hand down over it, so suddenly he startled even himself. He heard a sharp intake of breath from her before her hand relaxed again under his, palm flattening just over his heart.

For a few minutes they simply laid next to each other, as he let his thumb slide back and forth over her hand. As he felt his heart rate slow under the gentle press of Anna’s hand, he heard her breath slow down, evening out until a faint snore escaped her. He couldn’t help but smile then, giving her hand one last squeeze before carefully setting it on the mattress between them and rolling on his side to face her.

“Good night, Anna,” he whispered, but the only response was another snore.

[everythingoesnk]

Once in Rockfield Farm (1/5)

summary; you own Rockfield Farm and your bf Mary Austin asks you if you can help her friends with an enormous favour that will lead to a much bigger unprecedented change into your life. Thanks to a cute guy specifically.

word count; 6 126

disclaimers, PLEASE read them; don’t forget this is fiction. i’m using queen‘s 70s era as a base for the story but it won’t be historically accurate. the song mentioned towards the end of the chapter is from Taylor Swift, i don’t claim those lyrics as mine. sorry in advance if u find a f*cked up grammar mistake or whatever. feedback would mean everything, it’s the first time i’m posting something i’ve written it feels like i’m giving birth looool

warnings; minor violence at some point and mention of abuse

********

Mary didn’t stop until she convinced you to give green light to her proposal.

She called it like that, but it seemed more like an order. Both of you knew she wouldn’t let it pass until you agreed to.

Taken aback, you refused at first.

The idea of four strangers living in your house, coexisting with you in the only safe space you knew, wasn’t appealing whatsoever.

Even though all they needed was a studio to record, they’d have to stay until the album was finished. They could afford to rent a proper one, but Mary made it quite clear that getting out of town was crucial to avoid possible distractions.

You’d been fired from your job because the restaurant bankrupted, so the money they were going to pay for rent was welcomed.

Your grandfather passed Rockfield Farm on to you when he died.

It was a lovely place full of good memories, mainly concerning hours on end together in the studio he built in the attic throughout the years. The relationship you had with him had always been special, but ever since your nana passed away at the age of 70, your bond became stronger.

He also wasn’t there anymore, and you tried not to think too much about it, just were glad that you met someone like him. He was the main reason you loved making music so much.

Sadly, as you grew up, although your talent for writing songs and producing music was undeniable, you realized you needed to be realistic and pursue a more down-to-earth career.

Medicine was another thing you were slightly attracted to, it wasn’t your passion but it would have to do.

The music business was too complex and difficult to get in, and wasting your time wasn’t on your plans. It’s not like you were a prodigy or a diamond in the rough, anyway. That was your honest opinion.

But now and then you’d succumb and compose. It was an effective way to forget about the rest of the world and vent whenever something would make you sad, grumpy, anxious, angry… Rarely did you write about happy feelings.

What’s the fun in claiming how fulfilled you are with your life? Which you weren’t, but still.

Ballads and songs that’d leave you with your heart aching on the floor were your daily bread.

Mary was the only one allowed to hear your little creations. She’d try to get you to show them to the world, to step out of the comfort zone and perform them in public, to rush out of those same four walls.

You were quick to brush her comments off every time, content with her and your dog being the only ones to get to listen to your babies.

“How long they’re going to take?” you asked using a fake uninterested tone, pretending not to care whether they needed weeks, months or a year.

The truth was that you wished for the album to be done quite fast.

“Who knows,” Mary said. “When the album’s finished I’m the first to know, but in the meantime Freddie won’t give me any clues”

You nodded, unsatisfied with the answer.

“Thanks for agreeing to this. I owe you big” her eyes found yours and yours softened.

“If anything it’s them who do, don’t you think?”

Mary grinned and offered to cook something for tonight’s dinner.

She left you alone with your molecular pathology notes resting on your lap.

It was your last year in University, thank the Lord. One last effort and you would be a doctor.

After memorizing various concepts you found yourself staring at the horizon wondering how was Freddie Mercury like.

Obviously because of Mary you sort of formed this idea of him, but hadn’t had a face to face yet. About the other Queen members… yeah, Mary mentioned them sometimes, vaguely: she described John as a nice fella to have around, Brian as the only one with common sense, and last but not least, when it came to Roger’s personality, she told you hesitantly to judge him yourself.

You thanked her when she handed you the pen you forgot inside.

Mary gave you an encouraging smile, placing her hand on your shoulder and squeezing it.

As soon as she turned around to go back inside, you called her name, squinting your eyes to try and get a better sight of the vehicle that kept getting closer to your property.

“What?”

When she spotted the van she sighed happily.

“Finally”

Mary ran to wait for them in the parking area. She was over the moon, clapping and waving effusively to welcome them.

“Are you coming or not?” Mary shouted, gesturing you to go and stand next to her.

You took your time to get up from sitting upon the grass and do just that.

Not a single second since they pulled over went by and Mary was already imprisoning Freddie in her arms.

You chuckled, completely sure he would be dead in a matter of seconds if she wouldn’t loose her grip.

He lovingly wrapped her in his and stroked her hair.

All of a sudden, running from the backyard where he usually played in the mud (this time was no different), your dog appeared on scene. You asked him to remain quiet and by your side, which to your dismay he did not obey.

He went and greeted Queen, who pushed him away with no bad intentions, they just didn’t want to get dirt on their trousers.

John, nevertheless, got on his knees and began patting him. It did not take long for him to regret it when Sherlock seemed to be captivated by his face, licking it non-stop.

You cleared your throat. It would be nice of Mary to introduce you, being the one who organized this whole of a mess in the first place.

Apparently she read your mind. The next thing she did was link arms with you.

“This is (Y/N)” she spoke. “Freddie, come here”

“You have no idea how happy I am to finally meet you”

Freddie gave you two sweet kisses, one on each cheek.

“Same here” you nodded and mirrored his smile when you saw it reached his eyes.

In a heartbeat you were fascinated by him.

There was this intriguing strong aura he projected that made you feel like you were in the presence of someone from the royalty, someone important.

Freddie examined you from head to toe and fell in love immediately with your outfit, a pastel blue dress with tiny sunflowers printed all over it. He did spot your exposed feet and smiled pleasedly at your choice of painting your toenails with the colours of the rainbow.

“Boys, don’t be rude and come say hi” he gestured his bandmates, who were taking a rapid glimpse of their new temporary home, and stepped aside.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Brian”

“Nice to meet you too” you kindly responded, shaking his hand.

“Thank you very much for allowing us to record our album here. If we win a Grammy expect you to be the first one we address in the speech” he joked, face beaming with a heavenly smile.

Damn, you were so soft for him already. And you wanted to touch his curls.

“You’re welcome, Brian”

“Yes, we’re endlessly grateful” another gentle voice joined the conversation.

John stood now in front of you.

“Hi, I’m John Deacon”

“I know” you laughed, tilting your head to the side. “I hope your stay here is… productive”

“I hope so too” he smiled big, and it made your heart melt. He was so cute.

Roger was next.

He was wearing a black leather jacket that fit him like a glove. One silver bracelet hugging his right wrist, matching the necklace around the neck. What caught your attention the most was the glittery rosy shoes, though. He had long blond messy hair (like the others, except the colour part), and prominent sideburns.

They looked ridiculous, you thought, although every second you spent contemplating his face the less they bothered you.

He was gorgeous, what the hell?

You got somehow a little nervous.

“Productive it shall be. I’m Roger” he spoke, referring your words from before. He took your hand and held it to his lips. “We’ve come to the right place, guys. With such a pretty face like hers we’ll never run out of inspiration” he snorted when he heard John face-palming himself.

You raised an eyebrow, unimpressed.

Sure Roger didn’t mean that at all, it was just his constant flirty mood Mary warned you about taking over him, you reasoned.

“Don’t get it started, Rog. We don’t want her to kick us out the very first day” Brian scolded him like a father would his children.

Roger laughed, his silly expression never fading away, and soon he was again observing you.

“I was joking, I’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable,” he said, taking some of the heat out.

“It didn’t,” you said back, confident.

You followed the others when they headed to the house carrying their respective suitcases with Mary as the leader.

Roger was fast to grab his and catch up with you.

“You live alone?”

“I have Sherlock”

He was still in ecstasy, trying to get everyone’s attention.

“That’s it?”

“That’s it” you shrugged. “It’s not as tragic as it sounds. I enjoy my own company”

“Oh. Anyway. This is a farm, right? You do all the, huh… you know, farm work on your own?” he looked around, scanning a bit the surroundings. He pointed with his chin at one big rooster. “The guardian of the house, eh?”

You let out a vague chuckle that made Roger proud, already eager to make you like him.

The reason was obvious: you were so eyecatching he almost tripped when he missed one of Sherlock’s toys on one of the porch steps, too engrossed in how the sun made the freckles in your face stand out.

“My grandfather baptized this piece of land as Rockfield Farm, but it hasn’t been a proper farm for years. Now it’s just… my house”

“You know,” he began, digging deep around his mind to come up with something so the conversation wouldn’t end, “years ago I had this summer job in a much more immense place than this. I had to watch over 200 sheep every day”

“Was it as entertaining as it sounds?”

“Clearly not”

Roger extended his hand to stop the door from closing after John came in. He motioned you to go first and winked, but you didn’t notice the last part, which slightly bothered him.

“(Y/N), this place is precious!” you heard Freddie praise.

Mary interrupted you before you could thank him.

“Then you sure are going to love the studio even more! C’mon”

//

“How did your grandfather manage to get this studio together? It’s pretty impressive” Brian enthusiastically asked, taking a small sip of tea.

The six of you were now chilling in the living room. It was the perfect time for them to rest since the road trip had been long.

Moments before they finished unpacking and settling down, Mary and you gossiped in the kitchen. She remarked how attentive Roger acted towards you, and asked if you were into him.

“Are you stupid?” you couldn’t believe her. “We’ve known each other for what, ten minutes?”

“I was just wondering whether there was desire at first sight or something”

“Desire at first sight?” you repeated slowly, taking in every word.

“It was a softer way to ask if you’d give him a ride or not” she laughed watching you gesture her to lower it down. “I’m just asking because I can tell he would”

Before answering Brian, you looked over at Roger.

He’d taken off his jacket and was rolling up the sleeves of the white tee he wore underneath.

Your lips parted, finding that mundane action quite amusing and sexy on him.

You looked away, guilt taking over you for having stared too keenly. There was nothing wrong about it, and you couldn’t explain why you felt agitated. Maybe you were self-conscious about whether the others noticed.

Forcing yourself to remember Brian’s words and with a sense of pride, you smirked behind your cup, gazing at the wooden floor.

Your grandfather poured his soul into this studio, which he also referred to as a sanctuary. It made you happy to hear Brian acknowledging its value.

There were several electric and acoustic guitars, a generous collection of microphones your grandmother enjoyed saving, two trumpets, a synthesizer -to which Freddie and Roger scoffed loudly at-, a drumkit, one saxophone, and a bass.

Not to mention the tape machine that still worked perfectly plus the recording booth.

Mary told you that John Reid, who was looking after Queen at the moment, managed to convince the label to provide them with a significant amount of money. You assumed they’d brought enough tapes to record on, therefore yours would remain intact.

“He bought half of the instruments”

“The other half?” John inquired.

“He stole them” you answered, not much of a fan about it.

“Whew!” Roger whistled.

You took a short sip of the tea and turned slightly towards the window, presencing a flash of light.

“A piano?”

Freddie dropped the question with no high hopes.

“Pardon?” you turned your head and looked at him over your shoulder with your body still facing towards the window.

The head movement was so fast that a clip you wore to hold a fraction of hair in place loosened a bit, letting the lock to fell down your face.

Roger stared at you in awe.

The light illuminating the room had a warm cosy tone, which surely helped to make your skin look softer and smooth. He wasn’t aware of the heart eyes he was giving you, but Brian, John and Mary were.

When you batted your lashes, he looked away and saw Brian try and fail to hide a smile when they locked eyes. He’d been caught.

“Do you have a piano?” Freddie questioned again, eyebrows raised a little.

A tiny playful smile made its way to your lips.

“Of course I have a piano” you cockily answered.

When you saw Fred’s satisfied grin appear you instantly knew he liked you as much as you liked him. It wasn’t in the attic; you’d show it to him later.

To be honest, the piano was your favourite instrument to play. So delicate, so powerful and majestic.

“Excuse me for a second” you got up from your seat, everyone confused by your sudden urge to leave, but not alarmed.

That light from before wasn’t a bolt of lightning, you came to realize, it was a car that parked outside.

A little voice popped in your head guessing it could be him, but it couldn’t… right? There were approximately two hours from Cardiff to get there.

It sure was someone lost, or maybe they were stopping by to beg to use your bathroom because they couldn’t hold it in anymore. It wouldn’t be the first time.

“How about we start dinner? I’m starving” Mary added.

Their voices kept getting lower and lower as you crossed the corridor, oblivious to Roger’s eyes following your every move.

You stepped outside and closed the heavy door behind you, but not completely.

The silhouette of the last person you’d want to see in the entire world was leaning against a red car, one you did know very well because you lost your virginity in the backseat. He was humming to a tune you didn’t recognize, head facing downwards.

Picking at the fabric of the sweater you put on to forbid the cool air of the night from touching your skin, you opened your mouth.

“Leonardo!” you whisper shouted.

He definitely heard you, although he turned a deaf ear.

“Leo, what the fuck!”

“You’re a stupid whore”

Shit. He’s drunk? You prayed he wouldn’t make a scene, not now, with Mary and the guys around. The shame to have them complicit of whatever could possibly happen would be unbearable.

“You’re miserable” he went on with his speech, voice thick, which made it difficult for you to understand him.

You called it quits three months ago. Apparently he wasn’t any close to getting over the fact you ended it.

“Leave”

After what felt forever, he abruptly raised his head.

“What?” the expression on his face revealed he wasn’t happy.

What his eyes showed freaked the hell out of you: they revealed an intense desire, either with words or physically, to hurt you. He wasn’t sober, and you were aware that he had struggled with alcoholism when he was a teenager. It was fair to say Leonardo never put a finger on you in that way before, but alcohol was the push he needed to do it and his body was full of it now.

A lump formed in your throat.

“Get out of here”

“I just want to talk” lifting his hands up in an attempt to seem harmless, losing balance doing so, he took a few steps forward trying his best to sound convincing so you wouldn’t move and listen to him.

“I don’t want to hear what you have to say”

“How do you think I felt? Huh? When I saw you making out with that moron? You’re so selfish. A fucking slut, (Y/N). You disgust me”

That was the final straw. You promised you wouldn’t give in and start an argument, but he fucking did have to bring that up. He had the nerve to blame you for moving on and having some fun with a guy a few days ago at a party.

“Are you serious right now, Leo? How dare you?! We’re not together!” funny enough, this time it was you walking up to him not giving a damn anymore about the consequences.

When you raised your fist to punch him, even in his state, he managed to catch your wrist on time.

“How wrong you’ve done me” he hissed, tightening the grip. That’d leave marks for sure.

He pushed you against the car, causing your back to crack roughly. The situation was so tense not even the tears were brave to roll down your face, your vision blurry and unclear.

“Please, Leo!”

Mary’s voice never felt so good in your ears.

You totally forgot about them, that you could’ve screamed for help instead of dealing with Leo on your own, too absorbed in rage to be able to think things through.

“Do something, help her!” she pleaded the boys.

Four arms were fast to catch him and throw him to the ground.

Everything was happening so fast, almost as fast as your crazy heartbeats.

Brian came to you and held you by the shoulders, checking you out entirely, looking for bruises. He was asking repeatedly if you were alright, if that man dared to touch you. You could hear him, but it felt like he were miles away from you, his words echoing in the back of your mind.

Mary grabbed your arm and the two guided you, treating you like you had some kind of disability.

Before letting them drag you inside, you quickly turned your head to see what was going on, and saw a fuming Roger threatening Leo to disappear and never come back.

Freddie and John remained behind him in case he’d lose his temper. They looked at each other in astonishment; it was the first time they saw Roger like that.

“(Y/N)” Mary called you, once in the common room. “Fancy a glass of water?”

“I’ll be right back with it,” Brian said, his long legs taking him to the kitchen.

“Sit down, babe”

“I don’t want to. I’m fine”

She could perfectly see the tension in your shoulders.

“You’re not. But it’s fine, it’ll be fine” she sympathized, caressing your hair.

At this point you were lost for words. You were confused, angry, stunned.

“Here, take it. It’ll do you good, (Y/N). Is there anything else you n—” Brian began, offering you freshwater to maybe comfort you and make the knot you felt in your throat go away.

“For fuck’s sake!” you felt choleric. Maybe you were about to pass out.

Freddie, John and Roger came in and stopped dead in their tracks when they heard you complain.

Brian blinked a few times.

You were desperate for some time alone to process the last couple of minutes, but that wasn’t any excuse for you to take it out on Brian when all he wanted was for you to get better.

“I’m sorry” you lamented, ashamed at your behaviour, and took the glass not looking at anyone in the eye. That’s when you saw you were indeed shaking a little bit.

He smiled comprehensively, not giving too much attention to your outburst.

“Who the fuck was that?” Freddie wondered.

John elbowed him and mouthed “not now”.

“I’m so embarrassed. I’m sorry you had to witness that” you sighed, choking back the agony.

“Don’t apologize. That piece of shit shouldn’t have treated you like that. He looked mad” Freddie condemned.

Another heavy sigh escaped your mouth when you saw everyone staring intently at you, hating the feeling of their unasked pity.

Roger hadn’t said a word. His muscles were tense, mind way too far from the scene recalling something from the past.

//

It’d been several weeks since Queen came to stay.

To your surprise you had no complaints. They helped you without hesitation with the housework and kept their rooms tidy. More or less. The only thing you could protest about was that after the sessions it seemed like the studio had been the target of a fateful hurricane.

However, they were too cute to stay mad at for more than ten seconds.

Coming out of your shell was easy because of them. It didn’t take you long to feel comfortable enough to show your true self instead of hiding in your room like you did the first three days.

Reading a book easily kept your mind busy, except now; it was unbearably hot outdoors and indoors. Without taking your eyes off the page, you held the Coca-Cola can against your neck seeking a refreshing sensation.

“Mind if I join?”

You lowered the sunglasses until they were fitted a little bit below the bridge of your nose. The sun was hiding behind a cloud now, making it easier to adjust your vision and get it focused on whoever that was.

A shirtless Roger stood before you, with a towel around his neck that he rushed to spread on the hammock next to yours.

His skin glowing due to the sweat made him look rather tempting.

Your brain lent a helping hand forcing you to smile and nod because you wouldn’t, couldn’t do that yourself.

A small grin tugged at his lips when he noticed your eyes on him longer than usual.

“You’re always studying, angel” he pointed out, lying down and crossing his arms above his head.

You let out a loud sigh you’d been holding in, cheeks red at the pet name he chose. Anytime he’d call you something sweet rather than by your name, it was always how you tended to react.

There was no denying that you’d sort of developed a small crush on him.

Nobody could blame you, though; the same thing would happen to any human being with feelings.

He always treated you as one of them, making sure you didn’t feel left out. His sense of humour was similar to yours, and you appreciated it when he included you in their plans even if he knew you were occupied with Uni and probably wouldn’t be able to join.

Also, he was hot as fuck. You swore you’d never seen a man so beautiful in your life so far.

“I have to if I want to pass my exams”

“Sure, but you’re always studying” he emphasized. “It cannot be healthy”

It couldn’t, but everything was so difficult and you were so lost at some points you thought the world as you knew it could end if you took the smallest break.

“(Y/N)”

“Tell me”

“Seeing you stressed out stresses me” he sat straight, took the book from you and shoved it away. “Fuck this. I suggest you have some fun before the pressure ages you”

“And what do you recommend, ay?” you questioned, crossing your arms across your chest.

“We could play Frisbee”

“Frisbee? Really?”

“Why not? I’m sure you’re not that bad” he teased, getting to his feet.

You faked a laugh and stood up.

“Don’t underestimate my skills”

He used his hand to mimic a mouth talking nonsense, and approached the pool since the frisbee was floating in the water. But he stopped when he felt he stepped on something, proceeding to lift his foot to see what it was.

Roger knelt down and picked a piece of paper up, which said in messy handwriting together with scribbles here and there: You tell me ‘bout your past, thinking your future was me.

His brows cocked in surprise and your eyes widened. You grabbed it out of his hand and held it close to your heart reflexively, as if protecting it. It must have flown out from within the pages of the book when he first threw it away.

Roger watched you curiously, crouched down still, as you breathed slow and deep avoiding eye contact. You could feel your face getting hotter.

He got up with an unnoticeable smile.

“That’s yours? It’s decent”

You waited for something to get out of your mouth, but this time your brain didn’t find a way to help you out, speechless at the fact that he liked it.

“Do you have more? I’d love to hear” he continued, glancing at you.

“Oh, n-no” you forced a laughter. “I don’t”

“I’m glad you’re not as bad as a lyricist as you are as a liar”

You gave him a dirty look and the corners of his eyes crinkled at that. He puppy-eyed you.

“Please?”

“No, Roger”

“We don’t protest when you’re in our recording sessions, you could return the favour”

“Excuse me? You’re in my goddamn house. Watch your tone”

He giggled, fascinated by how cute you turned out to be when poked at.

“What do I have to do for you to say yes?”

“Nothing. It’s not happening”

“(Y/N)!” he pleaded. “I want to hear you sing”

You shook your head.

“And I want to own all the dogs on the planet. Guess we’re both stuck”

Roger groaned in defeat and turned around to get his hands on the frisbee.

For some odd reason, it made your heart dance in your chest knowing he was willing to sit down with you and listen.

A sense of enthusiasm and confidence moved you and shockingly enough you found yourself considering the idea.

Roger gave you a quick head nod.

“Ready?”

You didn’t know what the hell you were doing but you whispered a small “okay”. It couldn’t be that bad, right?

“Take a few steps back first, you’re too close”

You pulled a face at him but quickly shook your head.

“I said I’ll do it”

Roger wasn’t getting it.

“Do w—“ he stopped mid-sentence, his sapphire eyes widening in understanding this wasn’t about playing Frisbee anymore. “Yes!” he took you in his arms and spun you around.

Since he was shirtless you could feel how well built he was. Although he wasn’t the most athletic man out there, apparently drumming on and on was enough to keep him fit.

“Rog, Rog! Enough! I’m feeling dizzy”

You were wearing a mini skirt that had a tiny slit on one of the sides. Seeing it rolled itself up a little you adjusted its length, avoiding any extra space to anyone’s imagination. Too late for Roger though.

When satisfied with how your skirt fitted, you looked up and saw a subtle wink roaming his lips.

“I’m ready when you are” he announced, bending over to grab his shirt and put it on.

At first your legs wouldn’t cooperate.

Roger followed you closely.

He saw you toy with your hair, questioning yourself why you agreed to do this when you weren’t a hundred per cent sure about it. He placed his hands on your shoulders and slowly massaged the back of your neck with his thumbs, relieving some of the pressure.

Every single hair of your body stood on ends.

“Don’t be nervous, love. We can drop it whenever you want” he conceded, tossing an arm around your shoulders.

Opening the door to the studio you felt sick, already regretting your decision.

Roger took a sit on the couch, watching you like you were about to do a mind-blowing performance that’d change the meaning of his life forever.

Feeling like a rat in a laboratory with the doctors waiting to see if the experiment was successful or not, you shifted weight from one foot to the other, discomfort intensifying.

The piercing electric blue of his eyes triggered something in you when they met yours. You didn’t know how but it seemed like he was speaking to you through them, encouraging and imploring you to open up to him.

“Take it easy, (Y/N). It’s not a big deal”

“It is for me”

You sank down on one of the chairs next to the control room, poorly trying to hide how intimidated you were.

“You’re singing, then? Or reading the lyrics out loud?”

“Singing” you muttered. God knows if you went downstairs to pick up your notebook you wouldn’t come back.

A very cheeky expression overtook his face.

“Okay, go ahead” he gestured, rubbing his chin.

You clenched your jaw and snapped your eyes shut. It was easier to do it if you weren’t looking. You’d just imagine it was your grandfather in the room with you instead.

“Time won’t fly, it’s like I’m paralyzed by it I’d like to be my old self again But I’m still trying to find it

After plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own Now you mail back my things and I walk home alone”

Roger’s fingers fidgeted at the sight of you tucking a piece of hair behind your ear, silently wishing it was him doing it.

He saw how your angelic features relaxed along to every word you sang. When it comes to your voice... He had to remind himself he didn’t die nor was leaving a dream, because it felt like he were in the very gates of heaven.

His breathing quickened, well aware he was witnessing something intimate.

Leaning closer, elbows resting on his knees, he allowed your voice to transport him to the place and time you were describing.

“But you keep my old scarf From that very first week 'Cause it reminds you of innocence And it smells like me You can’t get rid of it

'Cause you remember it all too well”

You swallowed before opening your eyes and speaking.

“There’s more but that’s the part I’m most proud of”

Roger’d fallen silent, his brain on fire.

He seemed to be absent, daydreaming probably.

Your heartbeat could make you go deaf any second, partly because you allowed him to have a peek at your heart partly because you were dying to know if he was any positive about it.

“You sounded like an angel” he stated in the softest voice, working on coming back to his senses.

There was nothing you could do apart from blushing and awkwardly shaking your head, yet on the inside you were saturated with a strong feeling that filled you completely: his opinion was relevant to you and the reaction he had was more than enough.

“You’re exaggerating. Thank you though, for your words. You’re very kind” you said, entwining ankles.

“Is it…” Roger was afraid this would ruin the mood. He decided to give it a shot and solve any doubt. More importantly, he wanted to make sure you were alright.

You weren’t stupid and knew where he was going.

“About Leonardo? Yes. Next question” you explained bitterly cutting him off, and pressed your lips together making an effort to not roll your eyes and appear rude.

He did ruin the mood.

Roger felt bad now.

“I’m sorry. Forget it”

“It’s fine” the flat tone you used before switched to a more delicate one.

It was overwhelming that he cared. He didn’t have to but he cared.

“I experienced something similar. I know how fucked up domestic abuse is” Roger confessed, bowing his head.

Wait, what? He what?

“Rog…” you got up and carefully sat next to him.

It shocked you how quick the atmosphere changed.

“It’s nothing, dear, it was a long time ago. She was… she was crazy” he laughed drily and cleared his throat. “You know what I mean”

“I do not. What you saw when Leonardo showed up was a one-time thing. He was drunk and barely himself, but I’m so terribly sorry you had to go through that”

“Ah, good for you then” he tapped you on the knee with a small smile on his face.

It broke your heart. How could anyone be so goddamn evil? You just couldn’t understand why they were people like that out there, willing to harm others deliberately.

Your mind drifted to Leonardo, did he become one of them?

Glancing at Roger, you hesitantly got closer to rest your cheek against his shoulder, letting him know mutely you were there in case he needed to vent more often. You intended to cuddle for just a few seconds before it turned out weird. That was until he wrapped an arm around you to keep you in position.

“Thank you” he whispered.

It sent shivers down your spine hearing for the first time his voice discreetly cracking up. You weren’t entirely sure about what he was thanking you for, though.

Roger didn’t quite understand why such information slipped out his mouth. Maybe he thought it was appropriate to share it since he contemplated you went through the same thing after what he saw. He just wanted to make sure you knew you could count on him as well.

The boys knew about the matter, obviously, but there was this thing about you he hadn’t figured out just yet that pushed him to speak to you about it.

That’s what his mind was saying, his heart on the other hand defended the idea that he felt comfortable with you and that since he presenced the incident with Leonardo he remembered his experience. Hence the fit of anger he had.

The thought alone of that scumbag hurting you made his head collapse. He was very sensitive about the subject.

“Better?” you wondered out loud after a while of snuggling, yet you didn’t move, finding the proximity significantly pleasant.

“Yeah, uh, sorry” he cleared his throat and released you.

“It’s more than okay”

He nodded, not really looking at you yet.

You tried to think of something that could distract him from those undeserved and heartrending memories.

There was no point of comparison to what Roger had struggled with, but every time you argued with Leo during the year your relationship lasted, you were grateful that your friends organized sporadic plans to help you forget about the fights.

You had to do that for Roger. You had to entertain him. To keep his mind occupied.

“Freddie explained to me drums are much more complicated than what they seem”

Roger glanced over the drumkit.

He was suspicious at first about the topic change, and looked at you from the corner of his eye.

“It can be very ambitious if you don’t do try for real, instead of goofing around. There’s too much going on. People believe it’s just hitting the drums and you’re good. Wankers”

It was unmissable how his face lit up, talking about his passion.

Crossing an ankle over your knee, you bent forward to get a better sight of his much more eased features.

“I’m sure it requires a lot of hard work, the coordination on hands and feet and all that stuff. Singing along as well must be tiring”

Roger’s eyes bored into yours, as if studying and reflecting upon your words. A corner of his mouth lifted.

“Yeah,” he replied amused, “physically it can be tough”

He knew what you were doing.

Just when he was about to ask you if you wanted him to teach you some basics, John came flying through the door.

“For God’s sake, there you are. Roger, I need you. Freddie and Brian are arguing again. Help me out spreading some peace before Freddie slaps him”

****

end of part one, lemme know what you think ! ♡

[redrobinhoods]

Age of Heroes | Chapter 4, Spies/Secrets

AO3 Link | 2600 words (approx) | Prologue, Chapter 3, Chapter 5

Chapter Summary: Obi-Wan discovers Cody's disappearance. Plo Koon and Wolffe meet Ahsoka and Rex in the Temple to inform her of their assignment.

CW: Torture

“Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose.” - Yoda

“General Kenobi.”

Obi-Wan turned from the holomap that he and Bo-Katan were looking over. Sundari had been taken, but the flight of the traditionalists to the Undercity was concerning. He was waiting to hear back from Cody and Boil. Peel, stationed at the entrance to the sewers, had informed Obi-Wan of their investigation into the pipes hours ago. For the first hour of no-contact Obi-Wan had been mulling over quips about getting lost in the sewers, but now, unable to raise any of the squad on comms, he was getting worried.

“Trapper.” Obi-Wan’s gaze fell from the ARF trooper’s helmet to the one that Trapper was holding in his hands. Cody’s.

“Captain Boil and his men were killed. There was no sign of Commander Cody but this. I believe they took him alive, sir. There were signs of a struggle.” Trapper passed the helmet to Obi-Wan, who took it numbly. He reached out into the Force for Cody but was unable to find him. He was vaguely aware of Trapper’s voice. “Do you want us to continue our search for him, General?”

Obi-Wan shook his head. “No. Continue to guard the sewers, but don’t send in any more teams. They’ll be wiped out.” He dismissed Trapper and returned to Bo-Katan and the holotable.

Bo-Katan’s gaze fell on the helmet in Obi-Wan’s hands. “They’re hiding in the sewers then.”

“It would appear so.” Obi-Wan sighed, tucking the helmet into the crook of his arm. The only way to help Cody now was to find Maul. “How is the siege progressing otherwise?”

“There are a small number of firefights still happening in section eleven. But for the most part, your clones have been as effective as promised. Still, without Maul in custody this could all fall apart quickly. We must capture him before he escapes.”

“I don’t think Maul plans on escaping. I think he wanted me here. We may be playing right into his hand.” Obi-Wan drummed his fingers against the lip of Cody’s helmet, feeling the loss of his commander’s presence. Cody would know what to do next. He always knew. Obi-Wan’s heart sunk with the realization that he may not have Cody at his side again. They had to find Maul.

---

“Have you seen General Skywalker, sir?”

“Not since I left him with Senator Amidala when I went to brief the Council on our rescue.” Ahsoka turned to look at Rex. He seemed so out of place, cold armor in the warm hues of the Jedi Temple. Even his face appeared cold, as if the warm light inside wasn’t reaching him. If it weren’t for the reflections against his helmet’s visor between them, she’d think the morning was shunning him.

“So, we’re not getting him back for a while then.”

She was so glad that they both openly knew about Anakin’s secret relations with the senator. After her return, and Anakin’s near confession to her about his marriage, she and her captain had danced awkwardly around the subject until Anakin had told the two of them that he was staying the night at Padmé’s apartment and would prefer to not be disturbed until late the next morning. That had become the new normal for the trio when on Coruscant. Ahsoka and Rex handled the men and the paperwork, Anakin handled Padmé. Though they tried not to think about them that way.

“Not a chance, Rex.” She laughed as they arrived at the door to her room. “Would you like to come in?”

“No, thank you, sir. I can wait out here just fine.” Rex leaned back against the edge of the doorframe. Ahsoka nodded, clapping him on the arm, then entered her room. It was barren, even for a Jedi. Her sleeping mat lay in the corner with two wooden boxes beside it. There was no other decoration. She knelt down by one of the boxes, sifting through its contents for her beading kit.

“Little ‘Soka.” Ahsoka turned to see a familiar Kel Dor standing in the doorway to her quarters.

“Master Plo! Come in.”

Plo Koon took a look around the room as he stepped inside. His eyes fixed on the small pile of beads and akul teeth before her on the floor, then on the small pouch beside them. “Going back to the barracks so soon?”

“I sleep better there, Master Plo.” She had tried, really tried to stay in the Temple after her return. But her room reminded her of Bariss’ similarly non-descript room, and the silence was deafening. After a week of sleepless nights, she had asked Anakin and Rex for permission to stay in the barracks with the 501st when back on Coruscant. They had managed to find an unoccupied private room for her in their wing, which she had gladly accepted. She suspected that it had once been a storage closet from the smell of chemicals that had hung around her first week there. But she’d felt more at home among the clones than she did around the Jedi, and soon the chemical smell was gone, and she considered the room to be hers.

“I believe that I understand. We’ve spent so much time on the front lines with our men that it feels strange to not be around them. But you must also remember that the war will one day be over and that you must return to the Jedi Temple after it ends.”

Ahsoka nodded silently, looking beyond Plo Koon to the still-open doorway, where she could see a set of grey armor with an iconic helmet tucked under one arm next to Rex. “Where are you going?”

“Commander Wolffe and I are being sent to Utapau. Chancellor Palpatine believes that General Grievous is hiding out there.”

“Why?”

“An intercepted message from the Chairman of Utapau. It may be a trap.”

Ahsoka remembered Anakin’s vision. “Or, this could really be the end of the Clone Wars.”

Rex leaned further into the doorframe. “Utapau?”

“Utapau. So says the Chancellor, at least.” Wolffe shifted back and forth. “I hope he’s there, I’m ready to face that bastard again.”

Rex sensed apprehension. “But?”

Wolffe scoffed and shook his head. “I have a bad feeling about this, old boy. Not about Grievous, there’s something else. Something feels wrong about all of this.” For a moment Wolffe’s façade cracked, and Rex saw a wave of fear pass over his face. Then he was back. “Maybe I just need to take some lysinate.”

“You have a headache?”

“Ever since we got our orders to Utapau.” Wolffe reached up to run his hand over the back of his head. Rex bit back asking if he’d had his inhibitor chip checked recently. He knew that chip scans had been implemented as part of their quarterly physical as part of an effort to catch pre-tumorous ones, but he still worried.

Rex reached out for Wolffe, grabbing his shoulder and stepping closer, but before he could speak the conversation inside the room reached them. “… this could be the end of the Clone Wars.”

Wolffe turned from Rex to face the inside of the room. “Did you have a vision?”

“Master Skywalker did, when we were on the Invisible Hand. And why not? Dooku is dead, you’re about to track down Grievous, why wouldn’t it end here?”

Plo Koon shook his head. “There’s something missing.”

“Maul’s capture.” Rex offered.

“With him in custody we may be able to find out the identity of Darth Sidious.” Ahsoka finished. “Dooku, Grievous, Sidious. All in one blow. Not to mention Maul. How else could the war end?”

“The Separatists finish building their super-weapon and blow us all up?” Wolffe proposed.

“That’s just a rumor.” Rex said.

“So was the Malevolence, old boy.” The memory hung in the air, stifling the conversation.

Plo Koon brought his hand to his mask for a moment, letting it rest there while he thought. “Commander Wolffe, Captain Rex, could I get a moment of privacy with Commander Tano for a minute?”

“Yes, sir.” The clones stepped back, manually closing the door behind them.

“What is it, Master Plo?” Ahsoka stood from the floor to face her friend.

“There is something you should know, and it’s best that you hear it from me. You, your master, and the 501st will not be returning to the front, but will be staying on Coruscant for a few weeks. Master Skywalker is on a special assignment here at the moment.” Plo Koon paused, returning the hand to his mask.

Ahsoka crossed her arms, her interest piqued. “What kind of assignment?”

“Your Master has been asked to observe the movements and actions of the Chancellor and to report his findings to the Council. He has been allowed to remain in office far too long after his term has expired. The Council wants to know what his true intentions are.”

Ahsoka dug her nails into her forearms. “They told him to spy on the Supreme Chancellor? The Chancellor has been a great friend and mentor to Anakin! I can’t imagine he is happy about this.”

“I can’t imagine so either. Which is why the Council wanted you to know.” Plo Koon stepped forward, placing his hands on Ahsoka’s shoulders. She sensed hesitation in his statement and wondered if the Council had wanted her to know, or if Master Plo had wanted her to know. She relaxed slightly under the weight of his arms. Her grievances were against the Council, not Plo Koon.

“Thank you, Master Plo.”

“You are very welcome, little ‘Soka. Now, Wolffe and I must be off to Utapau. Evidently, we have a war to win.”

Ahsoka remained standing as she watched Master Plo exit her quarters. She tried to reach out into the Force, to feel into his future, but there was something blocking her from reaching beyond the doorstep of her quarters. Wolffe was tense, she could feel the worry radiating off of him. Perhaps that was it. She’d never felt such apprehension coming off of a clone before, let alone Wolffe, who she regarded as decisive even in the face of his own wrongdoings. Her concentration was broken as Plo and Wolffe stepped away. The moment gone, she knelt back down to gather the rest of her things.

---

“You’re wasting your time; I’ll never betray him.” Cody rasped; his voice hoarse from the pressure of the grappling line. Though it had left his neck almost a day ago, the pain remained. His hands were tied above his head to one of the pipes. His armor lay at his feet in pieces, leaving him in his blacks. He felt exposed without it, but also thankful for the relief its absence put on his shoulders.

Maul made a sound that Cody would’ve described as a chuckle if he believed Maul to be capable of humor. “How charming that you actually believe that to be true. Clones. Bred for combat. All part of the plan.”

“What plan?” This time, Cody could gag when Maul moved towards him.

“The plan. The only plan that matters. Not even I was made aware of its grand design,” Maul ran his fingers over Cody’s scar almost absentmindedly, “but I played my part. And do you know what happened to me? I was cast aside. I was forgotten. But I survived, and I can thrive in the chaos that is to come.” He slipped his hand under Cody’s jaw then pulled it away as he took a step back, fingernail’s raking against Cody’s skin. He turned to the waiting Mandalorians. “Saxon, information is a valuable commodity. See to it that the Prime Minister does not become an asset to our enemy.”

"Yes, my lord.” One of the Mandalorians split off from the group, Cody made a mental note that that tunnel must be the way out of the sewers.

Maul turned back to Cody. “I was hoping that Skywalker would accompany your invasion instead of rushing off to Coruscant. I wonder…the moment may be upon us.” Maul’s eyes became distant, and Cody felt as if his blood had turned to ice. A familiar pounding started in the back of his head. It had been there for weeks, starting a few days before the Yerbana campaign. Cody knew that he wasn’t a Force user, none of the clones were, but maybe being around the Jedi had given him some connection to its essence. And maybe, just maybe, the Force was trying to tell him something, trying to warn him of some danger. Or his inhibitor chip was decaying. He pushed the thought out of his mind. Then Maul was back. “Do you know what Kenobi has done to me? He has taken everything from me, and for that, he will pay.”

"And me?”

Maul cupped his face again and Cody scowled, feeling Maul’s hot breath on his face. “You are going to help me make him suffer.” Cody closed his eyes and tried to reach for Obi-Wan in the Force, but he could feel nothing. It’s probably not how the Force worked. Maybe the Force was busy at the moment. “There’s no use in reaching out for him, he won’t come until we’re ready. Though I imagine that it will take him longer, without his cherished commander at his side.”

“You’re overestimating my importance.” Cody made sure to meet Maul’s yellow eyes as he spoke, searching for any signs of weakness in them.

“Am I? Perhaps so. They haven’t sent any more search parties for you. I suppose they’ve cut their losses and moved on already.” Maul pulled his hand away once more, and Cody allowed his head to fall against his chest. He was tired. But if Maul was telling the truth, at least no more of his brothers would die for him in these tunnels. “Rook, start from the beginning. I believe our guest is becoming bored.”

---

Rex awoke with a jolt. His hand reached for his stomach as he scanned the small nondescript room that he called his own. Nothing. He swung his legs over the edge of the bed and lay his head in his hands as he steadied his breathing. He must’ve been having a nightmare. The chronometer on his desk read 04:54, he would’ve been up soon anyways. He slid off the bed and grabbed the towel and fresh pair of blacks that waited for him over the back of his desk chair. There was nobody else in the hallway when he stepped out. As usual. Rex was often the first one to rise. He turned towards the showers but a voice floating down the hallway stopped him.

“… from Dooku has been lost.” Ahsoka said.

“He’s dead?” Obi-Wan’s voice. Of course, Mandalore was nearly opposite Coruscant in time and Ahsoka had no circadian rhythm that he knew of.

“Anakin killed him when we were rescuing the Chancellor.”

“With Dooku gone, we’ve lost a vital link to understanding the mystery of Darth Sidious. Perhaps, Maul’s capture may be able to provide the missing pieces to this puzzle.” Rex moved towards the voices, coming to a stop beside Ahsoka’s door.

“Have you found him yet?”

“No, and Cody is missing.” Rex felt the towel hit the floor at his feet but had no memory of when he had dropped it. He felt numb.

“I’m so sorry, Master Kenobi. I’ll tell Rex.” Maybe she could sense his presence outside already. “I wish we could be there for you.”

“Thank you, Ahsoka, but I’m afraid that you must remain on Coruscant for the duration of Anakin’s assignment. He may need you.”

“Best of luck finding Maul, and Cody.” There was the sound of a holocomm clicking off, then Ahsoka was standing in the doorway beside him. She took his hands in hers and pulled him into her embrace. Rex let himself fall apart in her arms.

[ailuronymy]

Book Club: Tallstar’s Revenge, chpt. 28-36 overview.

A definitive diagnosis, courtesy of two famed armchair psychiatrists:

“Basically, this cat needs CBT.” -- S.

“YEP.” -- K.

This week we’re discussing this chapter through these nine questions. Please feel welcome to do the same and @ailuronymy + use the tag #ailuronymy writing challenge. Don’t forget: next time is the last section, but it’s never too late to jump on board if you want to!  Happy reading and I’m looking forward to seeing your feelings about this book.

1. First impressions?

K. Exhausting to read - like, genuinely, it was a slog. Jake is the only light in all of this badness, and even then.  S. Bad! We've hit Bluestar's Prophecy level and I don't see things turning around. Regrettable. 

2. How did you feel reading this section?

S. Hm. I would say one-part anger, to two-parts bored, with a dash of Love Jake. K. I'd say betrayed if I didn't fully expect this kind of pedantic shit from the Erins already. But like... yeah. I somehow didn't think it could get worse, and yet.

3. What chapter did you find most interesting/moving/effective, and why?

S. The one with Jake and Talltail inside the house as Jake tries to explain things to Talltail and convince him that to get what he wants he has to not be a jerk. K.  Chapter Thirty-One was fun just to see Jake/Talltail hijinks in play. Everything else was mind-numbing.

4. What chapter did you find least interesting/effective/most frustrating, and why?

S. Uhhh, all of them but especially the huge chunks of description while he was travelling and running around doing whatever the hell. In every way but physically, I was asleep. K. Yeah, same. The first chapter of this section has everything I hate: swaths of dry, meaningless descriptions, Shadowclan being vaguely mean, and Sandgorse Coming Back To Menace Me Personally. All bad.

5. Is there a passage that stuck in your mind–for good, or not-so-good reasons? What is it, and why did it stand out? Try breaking it down and analysing what this passage does and how.

S. For me, it was a specific line: “I just say yes to everything, he likes that” --  I LOVE Jake. S. It was so cute, and it captured such a nice relationship between Jake and his person. It also reminded me a lot of talking with the old boy, because probably we're just saying, "that's really interesting" to each other back and forth. 

K.  I agree. The line just before that is: “He is like kin,” Jake snapped back. “I’ve known him my whole life. He makes sure I’m warm and fed. And I sit with him and keep him company when he’s alone. We talk to each other.” K. It's just? Sweet?? K.  Like, there's SO MUCH hate on Twolegs in Warriors for some level of understandable reasoning, but it felt so good to see Jake actively defending his owner's role in his life.

S. Yeah, I was like, okay Erin Hunter, so sometimes you get it. And then they turn around and go straight back to self-wedgietown and I'm like, really. S. On that note:  S. I guess for not-good reasons, it has to be the kitty litter scene. S. Erin Hunter wins the gold in the "what the fuck are you doing" event, yet again.

6. The story has taken a major shift in setting and location. Do you like this new space more, or do you miss the clan? Why do you think you feel this way?

K. Bad! I want to be back with the Clans, please! It was terrible there but at least it wasn't whatever the fuck is happening here! K. That said, I did enjoy the house scenes. Just as a treat.

S. I was very curious to see how they were going to explore the outer world, but it was a huge let down. They either drowned it in empty, boring description, or just kind of overlooked it. They didn't go for the nice medium of interesting vignettes the way I (foolishly) had hoped for. S. More for me, I guess.

7. Last week we talked about what lessons we could learn from the text. This week, think about what lesson you would most want to teach Talltail at this junction in his life. What advice does he most need to hear?

K. PLEASE STOP BEING THE WORST K. But for real: hm. I guess like. You need to learn to let go of shit, my man. Sometimes bad things happen and you have to put them aside or else those feelings take over your life.

S. Yeah, I'm thinking along the same lines. I think Talltail really needs to learn how to separate his thoughts from his self, because he's clearly very invested in the narrative he's telling himself. He's had a history of negative self-view (encouraged by his environment) and it's going to be really beneficial for him to practice genuine mindfulness and recognise that a feeling is a feeling, not a command to be followed. A thought isn't you, it's a thought. You're allowed to have both--in fact, can't stop yourself from having both--but you don't have to believe in them or be controlled by them. S. What's motivating him is guilt, which often comes from shame and feelings of powerlessness. He's trying to take control and he feels this narrative he's telling himself is the solution. S.  So my advice would be basically that: you're not your thoughts or your feelings. Those just happen to you. Imagine them like weather, always changing, coming and going. S. And when you practice that enough, you'll become aware of how constructed it all is. You'll realise when you're acting through your emotions without being aware of them. For example, like this whole quest.

K. Oh, also as an add-on: obviously a lot of self-care and putting yourself on the path towards bettering yourself comes from choices only you can make, but listening to your support system and truly hearing what they have to say is also important! K. Talltail has had a lot of people around him trying to vouch for better options he could take to better himself, offering to listen and support him, and he's been too in his emotions or too angry to listen to them.

S. Basically, this cat needs CBT.

K. YEP.

S. I'd also like to offer advice to Jake. S. I want to tell him that he's right to stand up for himself. I want him to know that if someone he likes denigrates him or mocks him or views him as inferior, they are not being a good friend or partner and he deserves to have someone who builds him up, supports him, and respects him. S. That feels important to me, given how fast he seems to have fallen for someone behaving so poorly towards him. S. Like, not to be meta, but that's a Big issue in queer community in the real world.

K. It's true! K. People get so desparate for connection that it's easy to let a lot of red flags go unnoticed for the sake of keeping something going.

S.  Queer folk believing that they're unlovable, so they settle for anyone who gives them attention or insinuates that maybe they're okay. Queer folk feels so desperately, deeply isolated and lonely, that they decide to get with someone inappropriate or even toxic because they're terrified that they'll never find anyone else, that it's their only chance at finding a romantic partner. S. Exactly. I want Jake to know that he's loveable and valuable, and that having high standards and expectations and healthy boundaries for a partner and romantic relationship is good and important for finding the right relationship and achieving the kind of happiness he's looking for.

8. Think back over the book so far (including this section). Out of all the characters, who do you relate to the most? Is this because the character is similar to you in personality, or because their experiences are familiar to you–or a bit of both?

K. In its own way, I think I can find aspects of Tallpaw relatable. Wanting to direct your anger at people over things you can't change or take back is something that's pretty human. K. But on the flipside: I would like to think that I could relate to someone like Dawnstripe, too? In being able to look back on those moments with an adult's perspective and be able to go "Hey, listen, I've got your back, but also: have some advice that you really need to hear."

S. Same hat! S. I was also going to say Dawnstripe. Out of all the characters, I relate most to her--probably because she's a teacher! I also got wildly mad at that stunt Sandgorse pulled with the tunnel, and Shrewpaw in that fight, so I feel like Dawnstripe is definitely a character that speaks to my experience of this book. S. We can make our first Book Club merch: we are all Dawnstripe.

K. YES. I’m okay with this. K. The back of the shirt says "heatherstar please call me back" in tiny font.

S. GOD. Iconic. 

9. We’re on the second last section of this novel. Next week, we read the end! But before we get there, what do you think will happen? If you’ve already read this novel before, use this space to write what you remember feeling at the end last time–did you feel happy, sad, disappointed, angry? Do you think you’ll feel differently this time?

K.  Sandgorse is going to personally come into my home and destroy me on the spot with bad characterization, and that's a threat from Erin Hunter herself.

S. Yeah, you were very right when you predicted that he'd be giving Tallstar one of his lives, I think.

K. Talltail hasn't even had an apprentice yet! We're just gonna fast-track his entire warrior-hood and go straight to leadership once he gets back to Windclan, I think.

S. Yep! Just like they did for Bluestar. S. Everyone knows being a deputy is a boring, worthless job and the only thing that matters is being leader.

K. Sigh.

S. Obviously, Talltail isn't going to kill Sparrow, and Jake and Talltail will have some kind of sad goodbye, and then Talltail will go back to Windclan like, "sorry I left, I had a crisis."

K. Yeah, and they'll all go "Oh hey dude, thanks for showing back up, we weren't too worried"

S.  "We barely noticed you were gone." [zoom in to Talltail's dead eyes as he looks at the camera] S. Also, what's the bet that they're going to manifest some drama over Talltail with Reena and Jake? 

K. Oh, I'd say the chances of that are relatively high. K. It'll happen for like 1.5 chapters. K. And then be ignored.

S. Like, what's the bet they're going to try to shove a heterosexual plot in there and have Reena be all over him and mad that Jake's even there?

K. Yep yep yep. K. And then Talltail will snap out of it to brood more.

S.  Which is going to be wild given that the last time Reena saw Talltail, he was a huge prick. S. But she's a woman, he's a man, can Erin Hunter make it any more obvious?

Final notes:

K. Please. Unleash thy rage. S. From my notes: S.  "Erin Hunter is fucking wild, we don’t NEED the level of realism “taking a dump in front of my soon-to-be boyfriend,” holy fuck, great first date, you fucking crazy people" K. IT'S BAD!!!!!!!! IT'S SO BAD!!!!!!!!!! S. I literally had to stop reading to laugh for a full minute. S. I was like, you've got to be kidding me, you've got to be kidding me. Just a desperate chant. S. But they were not kidding me! S. And what makes it so egregious is that it's in such fucking detail. S. If this was Watership Down, a scene would not be ruined by: "He passed hraka by some ragwort before hopping over to him. "All right," said Pine. "What do you need?"" Like, it's not disruptive and doesn't ping to change the tone or like, emotional calibre of the story. S. Jake giving Talltail step-by-step instructions on how to relieve himself while watching was absolutely way off.

K. I am taking a fucking screenshot because look at this. Look at how horrendous this looks. This is the visual, writing equivalent of staring at a desert wasteland full of nothing. K. [screenshot of several pages of description] K. Pictured above: NOTHING IS FUCKING HAPPENING S. I KNOW S. It was just barren expanses of running around that did nothing, achieved nothing, moved the story forward no amount. K. It is just. So monotonous. It's dry, and boring, and it feels so lifeless. K. It's the equivalent of fucking... fourth grade bullshit. "Talltail walked to the log. He jumped on it and used it to cross the river. He leaped off and continued on through the grass. Then he saw a moth." S. But yeah, it was unbearable. My eyes glazed over and I skimmed just about all of it. S. Other notes: S.  “I’m just skimming all this description, I don’t care, I’ve got teacher-brain on and all I’m thinking is, this could have been summary [...] and there’s so much description again, it’s just not interesting! I don’t know why people think “action” is interesting. It’s barely interesting for more than two minutes in an action FILM, why do you think a book is going to be somehow more successful at being an impressive spectacle than a film, my god, learn your goddamn medium”

K. SANDGORSE STAY DEAD 2K20 S. Note: "I fucking hate this bullshit ghost of Sandgorse thing. I can’t believe they killed off the character I loathed just to bring him back for reasons of cryptic bullshit" K. The fact that his ghost keeps fucking showing up is killing ME K. ESPECIALLY because he's gonna come back like "Son...... this is not the way...... Im proud of you.........." K. And Talltail will go "oh shit oh fuck you're right" S. "Daddy loved me all along. It's my fault for not realising that.” S. Literally all I can think about when Sandgorse shows up in these chapters is that bit in Twilight where Edward Cullen's force ghost or whatever is like, lie.

S. Because of how Talltail's behaving, I actually really do not vibe Jake and Talltail's relationship at all. K. Oh?? Go off, my good bitch. S. It pings badly for me that Jake meets this guy, who's an arsehole, and then he helps this guy, who's still being a racist dick. Then he gets feelings about this guy in a really short period of time, despite minimal changes in his behaviour towards him. K. Oh boy, yeah, that's all true. S. Not to be like Twilight again about it but like: this is not a great start to a relationship. This is actually a red flag. Someone who doesn't respect you and is just a prick and is using you as a means to an end, is not someone you should be attracted to. The fact that Jake is says something about how he's doing emotionally, and it really conflicts for me that someone with such a certain sense of self and value would find Talltail even remotely attractive. I don't believe it.

K. Jake’s superpower is just Being Kind & Having Reasonable Thoughts. “Aren’t you tired of going ape shit, Talltail? Don’t you just wanna be nice?” S. God, you're so right. S. I am super looking forward to writing Jake and Talltail's Hot Girl Summer, though. K. Which like, if Talltail had better things to be frustrated about, I would love Jake to fill his role of like... the complimentary half to Talltail, in that regard. K. Talltail is just SO in his head about EVERYTHING and Jake is just living in the moment! S. He’s vibing! K.  Lmao also from the notes: Jake shifted his paws. “I know I’m a kittypet. I’m happy with that.” He began to head down the slope that led into the valley. “It doesn’t mean I can’t walk a different path for a while.” — Talltail, recently shoved back into the closet, randomly befriending a comfortably out bisexual otter… who’d have thought S. Canon Talltail is a hot mess and that's Erin's fault, but these two are good. K. more highlights: The hunting scene… sharing together… “Only if it’s offered.” “I’m offering.” How the fuck did the Erins stumble into speaking in tongues and the translation coming out as Gay Rights S. "It's rotten work." "Not if I'M OFFERING." K. Talltail’s mew trailed away. He didn’t want Jake to go. He searched the kittypet’s green gaze. “You don’t have to come.” “I want to!” Jake shifted his paws, adding quietly, “If you don’t mind, that is.” Talltail glanced at the ground, feeling hot. “I don’t mind,” he murmured. “It’s good to have company.” — LIKE THEY REALLY ARE JUST LIKE THIS K. Oh man I have some other good notes: I can’t believe that Talltail is SO edgy and in his feelings that he can’t even stomach simulated affection to this random human. “Pretend it’s a tree” DUDE just let yourself GO, release your inhibitions  K. God can you just imagine K. Talltail finding Jake who gets him to calm down by getting so fucking cat high S.  Just like, "here dude fucking chew this plant and maybe you’ll calm down." K.  Talltail: I want revenge :'( Jake: bro. shut up and eat this leaf

  K.  “Please can I go outside?” he mewed in his most plaintive voice.” — Talltail just sounds like a sad little Victorian orphan. I can’t believe all the Miette goofs are canon and real. You kick Talltail like the football? Oh! Oh! Jail for Starclan! Jail for Starclan for one-thousand years! S. I know. I was losing it that we basically predicted the whole scene with Jake and his person. S. "I taught him how to say food but he's very bad at it." S. That was probably the most enjoyable moment in the entire section for me. S.  Makes you really wonder why the fuck pet cats have human-given names, though. K. FUCK IT DIDN'T EVEN HIT ME THAT UHHH K. THAT'S WACK HUH ISNT IT S. It's so wack.

K. I want us to just break something down for a hot moment S. I love to break it down with you. K. Talltail's plan is... bad S. Oh, it's dumb as hell. K. Like I'm imagining all of this from Sparrow's perspective K. Like it's one of those podcast horror stories S. I have that note too: this dude has no idea. K. "So one summer I accidentally got into a bad accident, and the guy I was with didn't make it out. His kid is really broken up about it and is pretty pissed at me, and straight up ignores me or glares at me the rest of the summer. Fast forward a few months and suddenly he shows up again out of the blue, and now says he wants to stay with me and my family. Says he's changed and that he wants to spend more time with us. THEN HE PLANS MY MURDER" S. It's really funny to imagine Talltail staring into the distance like, "my nemesis, you killed my father, prepare to die." And then smash cut to a completely oblivious Sparrow like, taking a nap. Having a snack with his friends. Smelling a flower.

S. Note:  "I’m so unbelievably bored of Talltail having the same three stupid thoughts over and over and over" S. “The heartless rogue was going to pay for destroying his life” GOD SKIP S. “Twolegs are rabbit-brains.” get some new material for fuck’s sake S. His internal monologue is now entirely on par with Bluefur's I feel like? K. it is!!!! it is!!!!!! K. It's the same quality! It's just so disappointing that a book that started off like. K. SOMEHOW better than BP. K. Just swiftly dunked us back in the can. S. They just beat you to death over and over with the same inane conversations, the same unconvincing internal monologue. You could have a better book by literally just cutting this one in half. Just edit out all the repetitive bullshit. S. But they need to reach word count, so they don't. They shove more in, because there has to be 45 chapters, because it's a super edition. K. It's disgusting. I know y'all have a business to run but also If It Weren't For The Laws Of This Land, S. It really reframes for me all the people who were like, "it's the best super edition!" doesn’t it? K. YEAH S. Like, yikes.  K. Like it's better than a lot of super editions and by a lot I mean Surprise, They're All The Same Fucking Book, K. How do you write the same book like forty times and never get it right, like, once.