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kaszuma · 3 months

Text

Aera Perennius | Hoshina Soshiro

Part 7 of “Certainly Yours”

pairing: Hoshina Soshiro x fem!reader

summary: soshiro was never one to raise his voice at anyone. But the one time he did, it was because he almost lost you for good.

warnings: Slight Kn8 Manga Spoilers, Description of Pain / Injuries / Hospitalizations, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Arguments, Cursing, Slight mention of self-harm

wc: 9,793

–

note: I finiahed it earlier than anticipated so here you go-- I had such a difficult time writing this because I've been so busy. There were so many changes and the original draft had been scrapped so many times that it almost made me want to give up and start over. But lucky I didn't or I would've not updated in time. So, yay!

English is hard haha and sometimes it hates me and just doesn't make sense when I read it in my mind versus when I read it outloud. Anyways I will be doing slower updates, so no definitive dates nor titles for the next parts yet. But Part 8 and 9 will be back-to-back spicy NSFW stuff (courtesy of reaching 200 Followers. Thank you lots by the way), So stay tuned!! This is not proofread. So if I missed any warnings feel free to tell me. 🫶

–

Sleep had come naturally to you.

The sound of rapid footsteps and muffled yelling had all but faded into the distance as mere whispers against your ears.

Such rapidness did not seem to fit the silence of what had initially surrounded you. The sudden weight of your own body being dragged left and right until your vision blurs. The stark darkness of city skylines transformed into the unnatural shine of the hospital's fluorescent lights; one that made it hard to pick people's silhouettes apart.

And as such, it reminds you of the distant past.

One that was filled with vast open fields, very unlike the corporate labs you had been accustomed with. A stark contrast to the very corners of Japan, in the countryside where your grandparents had established a simple life for themselves. Filled to the brim with rice crops and summer cicadas.

And it makes you reminisce about the short time you'd spend there. On the cool nights after your summer school days would inevitably end. And you'd be dragged to a summer house where cousins and relatives had doted on you.

Such a homeward bound place was a far cry to the bustling streets of Tokyo's Eastern divisions. Which had often been endowed with the familiar cries of loud music and the steady rumbles of heavy railways underneath you.

One that Kaiju had lamented no peace from.

Even in the midst of high-story buildings where your workplace had boasted the use of sound proof walls. The cityscapes nearest Izumo Tech Corporation could not even be muzzled by its titanium doors, of which Japan's Top Secret Bioweapons had been kept. Schematics and all.

You had grown used to such a taciturn work environment.

Your existence is thrown into the small bubble of your private lab. Segregated from your coworker who valued work over social relations. And you had been much the same.

You and the rest of the technicians were far too focused on your projects. Tinkering away at the prototype suits that the company had sent your way. A partnership between your parent company and Japan’s Defense Force. A task of which you and a few others had been selected to create and maintain.

And how lucky you had been, to land yourself a snug spot in the notoriety of the Third Division's wake. The very same division that had boasted the least amount of casualties in the case of a large-scale Kaiju attack.

The very same division where Mina Ashiro had led and mounted into victory.

And you'd consider yourself lucky to have known such an amazing person in this lifetime.

For fate to have led her to you, you'd assume you've somehow accumulated some sort of good karma in your past life. The reward to you had been fresh in this new one. An action that had garnered some godly being to bestow upon you a chance to meet your soulmate.

You'd be remiss with disappointment if you hadn't met Soshiro Hoshina in this lifetime.

But prior to that. Before Ashiro had recruited you into her division, you had little to no contact with the officers on-field. Delegated to the simple task of sending blueprints in and out of Tachikawa's base should the time arise; begrudgingly in the early mornings of every month too.

Back then, you had befriended a bespectacled girl named Okonogi. Who wore a slightly bigger uniform than the rest of the recruits. A quirk of hers which you found rather amusing. She, who wholeheartedly believed she might still grow into the uniform that was two sizes too bigger than what was recommended of her.

And you had remembered the day you had met her too.

It was another typical day in your routine. Delivering notes to Captain Ashiro in and out of bases. Though this time, you had decided upon taking a detour. Seeing the empty spaces of the mess hall which granted you an opportune moment of grabbing some coffee.

And such a detour had led you upon the bespectacled girl. Your documents slipping from your very fingertips. And your other hand, which held the coffee mind you. Accidentally toppling over. Spilling the liquid against her pristine ivory lab coat. Staining it.

Lucky it had not been hot, or else that could've been an accident in the making.

“I am… so sorry about that.” Your eye catches the glimpse of her nametag, stained with a bit of caffeine. Okonogi was what it read. And you were already pulling out a handkerchief from your pocket. Intent on correcting the mistake you made.

“No, it's okay. Really.”

The sincerity in her voice made you visibly flinch. And you had half a mind to just shove her your wallet, a chance given to compensate her for the coat you ruined. But the look on her eyes was determined. Abrupt in the way she had declined you.

“Are you sure? Money shouldn't be a problem. I can definitely get you a better coat within the day..” You spoke with much guilt. And yet she insisted.

“No need, really! It's just a stain. Nothing a bit of bleach can't handle.” She moves lower with a smile, one hand tucked behind her knees as she tries to pick up the few folders scattered on the ground.

“-Lucky it didn't hit the documents! Or the Director would definitely have our heads for it.” Okonogi had surprisingly jested your way. And a small laugh bubbles between the two of you in turn. As if you had known each other for quite some time now.

“I suppose so.” You had spoken between giggles. The sentiment shared between the two had all but eased the tension of the room.

And the brunette had gingerly handed you the pile of documents that had been untarnished. Though, one in particular catches her trained eye.

It was a simple list of materials used for the next batch of combat suits to-be-made. Or at least, that was the pitch you had planned to present today. In the hopes that Mina Ashiro would give it enough attention and send it to command for a much more direct approval.

And Okonogi, who was a newbie at the time. Had known all too well of the budding genius you had been. A technician far too enraptured in improving Combat Suits and weapons catering for strange combat. One that did not conform to the normalcy of firearms which had modernized the era.

And it seems one of your papers in particular had caught her attention. Like a hammer against glass.

It was a series of notes and drawings involving bronze wires that resembled the muscle groups of a Kaiju's inner workings. All built into the combat suit that had been Izumo Tech's symbolic masterpiece.

And its Kaiju plating was as amazing as it was unconventional. Built to last no doubt in the wake of an ever evolving organization.

Okonogi could not help but stare at it. Admiring the artistry and engineering involved in such a concept.

“An idea of yours?” She asks. And you nod in turn. Surprised by the way she did not immediately question the schematics.

Normally you'd be met with strange looks. One that questioned the very ethics of your research for involving Kaiju parts into the combat suits.

But the Defense Force had long since been converting strong Kaiju into weaponry. And applying the same sentiments to a combat suit, should be no different. “That's right.”

“I was hoping to improve the current designs of the Combat Suits.” You admitted. “If it succeeds, it might help our soldiers a lot more. Survivability wise..I mean.”

And Okonogi smiles at this. A layer of irony mixed in with the few laughs that bubbled within her chest.

She knew how fragile lives can be. Especially in their line of work where they had faced massive enemies almost on a daily basis. And a battle of attrition against such monsters? It was never a pretty picture.

But still, it had been a rare sight to see one so dedicated with quality of life improvements. And it was as if Okonogi knew that she'd be able to trust you with such a task.

“Glad to see you working on it! People have been volunteering less and less these days. But if we had better tech, I'm sure our members would increase by a large margin.”

Her assurance made you nod. Already taking the paper from her hands and delicately sliding it back to the rest of the folders you held. Carefully standing as the both of you had come to smile at each other.

“If there's a chance it can save lives. There's no harm in trying. It's just a part of the job.”

“There's definitely a truth in that.” Okonogi remained positive with a dip to her head. Making her rimmed glasses slide gently from the bridge of her nose. A tilt in her head as she next spoke.

“-But, why use bronze by the way? Wouldn't steel or alloy be a better alternative?”

You had looked over to the notes peeking from your file. And a smile is etched on the very corner of your lips. Complacent in the way you had so easily looked at her, as if you knew something she did not.

“There's a saying you see.”

Okonogi tilts her head upward. Who had finally moved to fixate her gaze to you. Eyes meeting with the absolute tenacity and confidence at your craft. “...a saying?”

You nod. “They say that some people should seek things that are more lasting than bronze.”

“Does bronze not last very long?”

“Oh it does. But even in metals, people try to find something much better right?” Okonogi who had paused to think about your words. Had only nodded in turn. Your sentiment was a much more refreshing and positive take than she had imagined it to be.

“I intend to find that material. One that would make a monument more lasting than the lives we lost.”

And Okonogi’s breath hitches. And you had looked her in the eye, with a determination she was sure would last you a lifetime. “Even if that means I have to dissect a Kaiju and use its very skin as armor.”

A bit morbid for her take. But still, she couldn't help but admire your tenacity. It was the same sentiment she'd see with the soldiers. And somehow, it reminds her of a certain someone who was all smiles despite wielding a blade.

“I suppose most Kaiju do have a layer of tough skin..” She jested. And your shoulders shake with a bubbling smile. The start of a silly friendship perhaps, where Soshiro's eyes would soon flicker your way.

And somehow things just started to click into place.

You didn't know if it was fate. Had it been Okonogi or Mina Ashiro that led you to him. But it wasn't until a few weeks later, you had found yourself responsible for the Third's technical division. Overseeing much of the repairs and weapon upgrades needed for Kaiju slaying. And it was in that very same division where you had grown much closer to him.

A strange recruit, scouted from the Kansai district. Where Captain Ashiro had particularly shown a keen interest in. His skill in the blade had been incomparable to his peers. And although he boasted the highest individual body-count when it came to handling melee pursuits. You had once thought him stupid for sticking to a fighting technique that had long since aged from the existence of firearms.

But how wrong you had been in judging him for that.

Okonogi often reminded you not to be too harsh on him whenever the two of you had just so happened to meet. Jesting that you two would've made a stellar couple, had you both given each other a chance. And although you've denied such things a few times before, Soshiro would always take a glance at you as if reading the expressions on your face. Thoroughly investigating the subtle expressions you wore that would've reached his conclusion.

And each time after that, he too would answer for you. A denial. A white lie.

And Okonogi always saw through it of course. She had been there since the beginning. Serving cupid for the both of you.

And when she can, she had always been peppy in her step. Pushing the both of you in a particular direction. Waiting for one of you to make a move. Calculated like masters playing chess on a board. By far you two had been hopeless. If it wasn’t for Okonogi’s encouragement, Soshiro wouldn’t have thought to visit you between breaks. And how lucky you had been to have the girl pry him out of his skittish shell.

It’s a wonder you two had gotten together like this.

You had rarely seen the girl frown or be frustrated over anything. Let alone your own bite when it comes to Soshiro's mixed signals.

So it had been a sudden whiplash, seeing her so frightened above you. Her voice had been unusually drawled and shaky as she repeated your name. Trying to keep you awake despite the far off look you had in the depths of your irises.

Wait.

Why was it so blurry all of a sudden?

Where were you again?

Right.

You were injured. And from the look on her face, it was probably worse than you had realized. The trickle of an unfamiliar liquid slid down your forehead to the very height of your cheek. Where you could’ve sworn a clawed hand had been there to comfort you.

Larger than your own, and definitely plated with armor. Gently grazing the very skin of your cheek.

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.

It's starting to hurt. The pain on your lower back had suddenly hit you like a metric ton of weighted bricks. Like something jagged and sharp had punctured through you. A result from a bad fall.

“Sweetheart. Keep yer’ eyes open alright?”

You heard a deep rumble from the side. And your eyes pried away from Okonogi's disturbed features. Suddenly enamored by the wine red irises that looked at you as if you had gone through hell and back.

Had it really been that bad?

Last you checked, you were narrowly able to escape Kaiju's attacks. The flashes of its flaky features had encompassed your mind’s eye. And the ground below you had bellowed like a monster’s mouth. Suddenly ripping open as a shockwave had violently lifted you from your feet.

And like a leaf on a windy day, you were blown to the side. Crashing harshly against the window of a boutique. A stray shard puncturing your lower back to the point of near paralysis. And it leaves you barely conscious to see the not so lucky victims that tried to escape the Kaiju.

One group in particular had been crushed by the rubble of a building. And somehow the scent of blood and bones was enough to knock you out cold. Their downfall would’ve made you vomit, had you not been injured and too dizzy to think about it all.

And as morbid as it sounded, you had been fortunate enough to have only been thrown aside. Sacked into a world of pain which had reminded you that you were very much alive. It had been a miracle that Soshiro found you when he did. Despite the slight sprain on his ankle and the sores he felt in the muscles of his arms. He forced himself to run. Empowered to meet with you, ushered by the help of Number 10’s powers.

And like clockwork he was led straight to you. The fears he had once buried deep in the back of his brain had all came flooding through.

And he didn’t know what to do.

…

You heard a few voices then.

Although it was barely comprehensible, you could make out a few distinct ones from the array of shouts. Your name in particular was whispered in a prayer. Begging you not to fall asleep despite the odd temptation to. And sure enough, the back and forth argument you heard between two figures was enough to keep your mind and heart racing with urgency. The look between Okonogi and Soshiro’s face had all been so different than usual that it frightens you so.

But despite the noise, despite the shouting. You heard him in clear daylight. Like it had been the only voice in the room. Isolated from the rest who had rushed in a frenzy.

“I got ya’ alright? I’m here baby. I’m right here.”

His reassurances had blanked when his voice cracked. Desperate like he had been ready to cry. The way your name had escaped his lips was almost hesitant. As if he didn't deserve to call you out. And you wanted to stop him before his thoughts could drift further. But your voice had failed you when you needed it most. A soft cry escaping your lips instead.

I'm okay.

I'm here.

I'm alive.

All of that died the moment it tried to leave your throat. And without those very words. Soshiro's face was left to contort. As if he were the one in pain instead of you. And how he'd wished that were the case.

“Let me through!”

You heard him scream. And your eyes had focused just enough to see Okonogi and a few nurses blocking his pathway to you. Desperately trying to push past them despite the grievances.

The sight had been a blur.

One second your vision was fine. The next you had felt the telltale signs of drowsiness hit you. And you feel the way the pain medication had started to kick in when your eyes had isolated itself from the world. Your body’s exhaustion hits you squarely on the chest down to your very toes. And when you had been dragged to the next room over. Soshiro had been the last face you had seen before separation. Sleep pulling you over until your breath is taken from you in that instance.

Your name had been the only thing Soshiro could say afterwards.

“I said let me through–That's an order from your Superior Officer, Okonogi.” Soshiro had warned her. Voice uncharacteristically deep when issuing an order. It was normally never used in this way. Such a tone was only ever used to command Number 10 when he had been too stubborn to listen.

But the bespectacled girl knew better than to fan the flame. And in retrospect, she out of anyone would understand his frustrations the most. Yet she stood her ground. Gently shaking her head at her heated friend.

“Vice Captain.” Okonogi started. Hands already raised to try and calm him down. And she could see it in his eyes; the way it subconsciously followed the rolling bed they had put you in.

Dragging your bed into another room where only the best medical practitioners had worked on you. And yet despite that, he couldn't find it in himself to sit still. His gut sinking at the mere thought of you getting worse than when he had already found you in. And he was willing to bet Weapons 10 had all but read the blatant emotions he displayed on his sleeve. With or without having to delve into his mind.

He was in utter ruin just from your condition.

“-Please understand. You cannot, in under any circumstances enter the surgery room, sir.”

“To hell with that!”

The scream had made Okonogi frown. And Soshiro had half a mind to push past the smaller woman. And rush forward with Number 10's help. But he stopped midway. Reminding himself that his suit could go on a rampage at any time. And right now, he did not want to expose Okonogi and a handful of civilians to Number 10's war-ridden desires. His deep baritones had instead vanished for more firm ones. Unlike the resentment from prior. Oddly curt in his delivery.

“Move. Or I’ll do somethin’ drastic.” He steps forward.

A threat is a threat, and he hoped that would at least be enough to convince the bespectacled girl to move. Yet Okonogi had known him for far too long to actually perceive it as one. And she looks unfazed by his words.

“Sir please.” She pleaded. “It'll only worry you more.”

Her voice was gentle. Understanding even. It almost reminded him of the way you speak at times. Stern but with a hint of softness when it came to his stubbornness. And how he wished it was you he was talking to right now.

“Just please try to calm down. We should get your own wounds treated first and then we can-”

“Fuck no. I'm going in there and-”

“Hoshina.” The stern voice of their Captain had made them both flinch. And the heavy cleats of Mina Ashiro'a footsteps had gotten louder as she had made her way closer to the two.

“Captain Ashiro.” Soshiro had spoken with a much more leveled tone than he did earlier. Hand raising into a salute as the rest followed suit. Though even in his greeting, his frustrations had still been made entirely clear. And he was more than willing to face insubordination just to get to you. But Mina was one step ahead of him.

“Hoshina. You’re causing a disturbance and deliberately disrupting the medical wing from doing their job--I'd let you run some laps. But I can see you're injured.”

Soshiro had glanced down at his body, a light scoff emerging from his lips when she had noticed the way he stood, limping.

“Patch your own wounds up and we can discuss it later.”

And Soshiro had frowned at the way she immediately knew. A sixth sense perhaps that he had been getting sloppy. And sometimes he feared Mina Ashiro would kick him out of the Third because of it. But Mina made no such accusation, instead her eyes had been understanding.

Firm as they usually are, she, like Okonogi, was quite aware of your relationship with Soshiro. And by all means, she understood his sentiment.

Today had been a jumbled mess. And Soshiro was practically facing the very brunt of it all.

With you as its victim.

“But-”

“That's an order, Vice Captain. Do not make me repeat myself.” Her stern reply had been met with his half-meant glare. Red irises swirling with thoughts before ultimately concluding that Mina had been right. Okonogi too. He'd just been too stubborn to see it.

And for a good few seconds, he finally drops his own staring.

Reluctant as he had finally turned around. Facing Okonogi with a sort of defeated look in his eyes. Uncharacteristic to her as he'd normally be so cheery, even in the face of impending death.

He'd be thrown into a pit. And as long as he was still kickin’ he'd probably end up smiling and joking about it the next day.

This had definitely been a first for the two to witness.

And although Mina had not usually been the closest to Soshiro. He couldn't help but make an exception this time. She'd waive him of running laps, not as an officer. But as her friend. And a stern hand was placed squarely on his shoulder. Gently giving it a pat of reassurance. One that Okonogi would follow up with her own.

“It'll be okay. Right Captain?” Okonogi glanced between the two.

“That's right. I'll see to it personally that she gets the best care. For now, get yourself patched up–That'll be the punishment you get for speaking to your superior officer.” She awkwardly spoke. Though a small reassuring smile had cracked on the face of her usually hardened expressions.

And such a sentiment from both the girls had silenced him before he could think of another protest to answer with.

“understood.” He begrudgingly spoke. His hand balling into tight fists at the possibility that you'd wake up without him by your side.

Bronze was made to last, yet it wasn't exempt from tarnish after all.

“Good. I'll inform you shortly once her treatment is done–Okonogi.”

“Yes?” Her reply had been immediate.

“Make sure his wounds are treated. And, I expect a detailed report on Number 10's latest excursion later.”

“Roger.” Okonogi had saluted. And Soshiro watched her as she slowly walked past them. Entering the very same room where he had not even had the chance to take a glimpse in.

His arms had gently felt the pull to another direction. Okonogi had done well at Mina's request as he had all but dragged his feet further away from the blaring red lights of the operating room.

And the flicker of your sleeping face was all that’s left before he too was separated somewhere else.

A place where he was left to wonder what will become of you. And for a moment, his distinct thought was a scenario where he hadn't met you.

If only he hadn't asked you out that day..things would've turned differently.

Right?

…

Your eyes blew wide open. The strangled breaths you took were caught on your throat as you could smell the bitter antiseptics nip the back of your nostrils. It reminded you of a hospital. That of which you had the unpleasant experience of having to frequent anytime Soshiro would come back to base injured.

Often you'd be on the other side of his bed. A frown on your face as the condition of his health had been on the top of your mind. And each time with a smile, he'd make a joke to ease the tension in the room. A signal to indicate he had been alright. Despite the lack of words you two would exchange.

Habitually it was you unharmed. You left to worry at his bedside.

So it had been a rare sight indeed, to find yourself on the opposite side of the spectrum.

Laid in thin hospital robes. Connected to a needle of an IV drip. The constant flow of medicine made you drowsy and your thoughts jumbled into a mesa of numbness. And if you had looked at the amount of bandages wrapped around your torso you'd surely start squirming in place.

But just when you were about to scrutinize the heavy onset of your heartrate’s monitor. The blaring sound was all but silenced when you heard the familiar tremors of his voice. Smooth and soft, like you had always heard them as.

“Yer’ finally awake.”

You turned to his direction. Bright eyes had met his own which had been as familiar as it was squinted. His irises were more crystalline and tired than usual. Puffy on the corners, like he hadn't been given a chance to get a good night’s sleep between your hospitalization.

And yet, despite the unfamiliarity of his somber tone; the despondent frowns he'd make.

His voice had been the sound you missed the most.

“Soshiro..” You croak out. Voice dry like someone had stuffed cotton down your throat. And you try your best to scoot closer. To move and stand like you had always done when faced towards him. But this greeting would cut short. Hands restrained by firm bandages and hollow tubes that weighed heavily on your skin. And you hadn't realized the mumble of a barely audible whimper from your mouth. One that Soshiro could not miss even if he tried to.

Soshiro noticed the way you had squirmed. Struggling to sit up. Which made him all the more vigilant. And he ends up closing the small leatherbound book he'd always brought with him. Sinking it back on his pocket where you had been accustomed to seeing it.

Walking much closer to you in an attempt to calm and shush you.

“Where are we?” You asked him. And his fingers hesitantly graze your cheek. The same way when you had blood trickling down it moments prior. “Base. The Medical wing took ya’ in.”

His words were oddly curt in delivery. And although the average person who knew Soshiro on a surface level could probably not tell. You were able to differentiate the distinct way his voice had sounded odd. Such sentiments laid rather clearly for you. And you can see the layer of guilt etched on his stiff face.

“Okonogi?” You inquired. And he gives you a nod.

“Safe. I'll call her for ya’ later so she doesn't worry.” and you let out a breathless sigh. Your head slumping against the cushion of the soft pillow. The lingering feeling of glass and cement on you had all been but a pipe dream now. A memory that you'd soon forget.

And how Soshiro wished it was that easy for him to forget.

“How are you feelin? I can call the nurse for ya if anything hurts.” He moves to turn around.

Eyes already searching for the small caller that was given to him in case of emergencies. Though your hand, as painful as it felt, had pulled him in. Weak fingertips grabbing the sleeves of his jacket to refuse him. Your eyes remained squinted as they were sharp despite the fatigue. And you caught the glimpse of bandages wrapped around his skin. A stark testament to the rest of his unblemished face.

“What happened?” You had immediately tried to get up. Alert in the way you had wanted to reach out and inspect his own injuries. But the fatigue of your body had stopped you. Causing you to slump forward and unto his willing arms who had been cautious in the way he handled you.

“Easy. You're still…not well.” Soshiro gently nudged you back down. Hand placed squarely on your chest to ease you into the pillow. But you stubbornly persisted. Compromising by sitting up against the bed's headboard instead.

“That doesn't matter. What's more important is, what happened to you. Are you alright?”

“That doesn't matter? Are you seriously askin’ me that right now?” For a moment you mistake his scoff for a laugh. His hands which had held you firmly had just as quickly left leaving the spot on your skin cold and yearning for his proximity.

Had you said something wrong? This aggression was unlike him.

Soshiro was rarely this agitated. And your voice couldn't help shrivel in meek irritation. Unsure whether you should respond back with much the same turbulence.

“Should I…not be asking you that?” You spoke unsure. And he shakes his head in turn.

“You were dead-still for five days straight and yer tellin’ me THAT doesn't matter right now?”

You didn't know how else to reply. The way his tone had shifted into a scoff had made you double back to glare at his face. For once since you awoke, you truly saw how tense he had been. Gone was his usual suave smile that made you laugh or cry in between meetings.

He had been too worried to focus on that. But you had been too frustrated at this sudden change. That it made your voice come more forcefully than you anticipated. “Well isn't it obvious? I'm worried about you.”

You replied. Your own expression had squished into rapid vexation. And you see the way he takes a few steps back, too far for your touch to reach. And it pained you that you couldn't just stand up and make him face you like you usually could.

“And you think I don't feel the same!?” He spoke loudly. Causing your shoulders to flinch in turn. One he had regretted as soon as he spoke. And yet, he continued.

“You don't think..that I didn't nearly kill myself when I found you bleeding in the middle of that goddamn street?” He pointed out the window.

And your expression had turned liquid at the images that flash in your mind. Imagining how he had found you. His thoughts, his expressions..you could only imagine the torment he felt the moment he found you. Barely breathing.

His breaths came in gasps. Eyes widened so that you can clearly see the crimson of his eyes peeking through. And suddenly you notice the way Soshiro had oddly been so vulnerable in front of you. The quips on your sore throat began to die down when you saw how frustrated–how fearful he had looked in the moment. And gods did you wish you woke up sooner just to comfort him.

“No–that’s not what I meant. I only wanted to know if you were okay. Is it so wrong to ask?”

“Well maybe ya’ shouldn't have asked at all.” He huffed out. Looking away from you with regret lingering on his features.

It was stupid. He thought To get so frustrated over something so tiny. But as much as Soshiro Hoshina excluded the guise of a proper adult. He had been flawed just like the rest of everyone else. And he'd be lying if he didn't have his moments of doubt. Often scrutinizing in the lonely privacy of his home. Where he knew no one would bother him.

That is of course, before you had entered his life.

But not everything was understood between the two of you. Okonogi was a witness to the piles of misunderstandings you both had caused. And without help you two were likely never to get along, habitually falling for the same skittish routine you had played at.

But a miracle happened. With him belonging to you. And you belonging to him.

So why was it that your heart cramped so much? Surely it was not the pains of a physical injury. Let alone a type of sickness.

Instead it was struck by simple bad habits and insecurities. One of which even you had trouble dealing with. And the loud firmness of his voice had made such an impact on your heart that you began to frown. Unable to hold back your bite.

“What is your problem!?” You started. “Listen, can we just please have this conversation some other time. And then we can-”

“And then we can, what? Do you want me to just sit here and forget that all happened?” He had interjected.

And suddenly you feel your brows knit tightly. Eyes feeling heavy from the burst of a headache you had gotten. Of all the times Soshiro wanted to argue, it's the time you had just woken up.

But he wasn't entirely unjustified.

There have been plenty of moments where you had fanned the flames of a fire that should've ended right then and there. Your word choice is poor and your temperament less than ideal.

For as frustrated as you had been, you understood Soshiro's sentiments. And your hands had raised as a sort of white flag. Not needing this fight to escalate more than it should.

Not when you were both injured and all you wanted to do was crawl into his arms.

“-Listen Soshiro, I didn't mean to upset you. I only wanted to know if you were okay.”

“Does that matter?” He repeats your own words. And you had to hold back another jab of acknowledgement. Smart in the way he played his words. It almost made you want to laugh. But this time, your intent came from sincerity.

And his small play of mockery had been a sight for sore eyes, since you had quickly gotten the gist of what he had been trying to convey. Wrong in your choice of words. This time, you correct your mistake. Sincerity and all.

“Yes it matters. More than anything– of course it matters.” You had told him. And you see the way Soshiro’s mouth quivers into a small tremble. Uncanny when he'd normally be so laid-back and sweet when it came to you.

And how you'd wish he just took a breather and relaxed. Maybe take a break so that they could talk things out. Without yelling preferably. But that had not been possible. At least not just yet from the way he replied.

“Well had I not made it in time, you woulda’ been dead. Do you hear me?”

“And yet, Here. I. Am. A witness to your unwarranted behavior.”

“Behavior that's justified because I shouldn't have let you outta my sight.”

Silence had followed soon after. Your mouth gapes for a moment to think of a reply when the words slip past your lips. And Soshiro would note how uncharacteristic that was, even for you. He, who was always used to your quick replies and clever jabs. But it seems his words had cut too far this time.

And he pried his eyes away from you. Chest heaving as he ran a hand through his face. “I shouldn't have..”

He composed himself. Clearing his throat whilst you looked at him with an etched frown on your face. One that he wished would go away. But he had been the cause of this.

He had been the one to make your smile go away. And it somehow makes him feel even worse.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you. I just-”

“Soshiro.” Your voice sounded like bells. And when he looked up, relief had immediately sagged his shoulders upon seeing your gaze blown wide open. Not at all restrained by the pain medication and exhaustion you had felt.

And your hand had gently reached up to grab his own. Gentle in the way her thumb caressed his knuckle which had been previously so bruised and bloodied.

And although there was a struggle to reach for his hand. Your touch was met halfway. Gently threading your much softer skin that would've paled in comparison to a blanket had he not taken glances.

“What happened back there wasn't your fault. We couldn't have known that the Kaiju would follow me back to the shelter.” You whisper. And Soshiro's expression had turned serious. Like he held a weight that you couldn't possibly fathom even if you tried.

“And yet I let it slip away.”

“I let it get to you, and now you're in here because of me.” He had wanted to so badly pull away from you. To walk himself out before he could be tempted to lean back into those pretty eyes of yours. But the moment he met your sight.

Those sad eyes of yours had been his journey's end. And he couldn't do that to you. Not when your expression had frustratingly asked him to stay.

“And yet it was also because of you that I'm still alive and breathing, Soshiro.” You reasoned. “You don't give yourself enough credit. If it hadn't been for you I would've been-”

“Dead.” He cut you off. “You would've been dead.”

“No. You wouldn't have allowed that. You're the Vice Captain, remember? If there's anywhere safer for me, it's by your side.” You didn't know whether such assurances had really made him listen. The way he was assured in that answer of his wasn't a mere fortnight conclusion. It was as if he had been thinking of such consequences for a much longer time, and that alone makes your heart sink.

So you scooted closer. Moving in to try and pull him down so that you could wrap your arms around his neck. And just when you were snaking it through his shoulders. His hands had stopped you midway.

His calloused palms holding on to the points of your elbows as he gently pries you off of him.

Normally this would be met with your pout. Maybe another bout of force just let the stubborn man look your way. But you had been too weak, still healing from an injury you had no control over. And his response is far too swift for your liking. Leaving your arms missing the warmth his body could provide you.

“No, no, no, no, no–no. You don't understand. I don't deserve to be anywhere near you right now.” He had managed to convince himself. Looking away as the anxiety within you had spiked upon his words.

“Soshiro. Listen to me we can-”

“What I’m saying is that we're done here.”

You had blinked. Looking up at him who had towered above your bed. A somber look on his expression despite the daunting words he had spoken. He looked passive. Unaffected even. Like he had been ready for this moment which had been planned for a long time coming. And your voice could only muster a feeble whisper.

“What do you mean we're done?”

“It's over.” Soshiro continued. Not once paying your face any heed. Lest he change his mind from doing you a greater good he deemed correct. “I don't want anything to do with ya’ anymore.”

If this had been a dream you would've laughed at the way he delivered such a sentiment.

You'd somehow suppress the inner workings of your shock and you'd wake up to find the morning documents you promised yourself to do; in the desk untouched where it usually had been.

And by the time you left your room, you'd habitually laugh it off and tell Soshiro about it in the afternoon just to get a chuckle and light scolding out of him. The usual banter that admittedly, had always been the highlight of your day.

But this had not been a dream.

And hearing him say that. Had hurt more than you anticipated it seemed. And your voice cracks before you can even register yourself speaking.

"Is this because you think I can't love you?" The sudden appearance of tears had painted your face. And you had tried to sniff away the bigger ones that threatened to spill over. But to no avail.

And Soshiro’s eyes widen at the telltale signs of your crying. An unexpected third party which had not been invited to the list of things he ought to do. And his head reels to face you once more. Seeing your face redden with a shame he'd never thought he'd see.

"Do you really think that I'm incapable of willingly loving you? Even beyond that fucking sword of yours-" And Soshiro had all but shook his head. Remorseful in the way tears had jerked from your eyes.

"That ain't the point!"

"Then what IS the point!?" Your tears had blurred your vision. And your hand had embarrassingly moved up to wipe it. One that Soshiro had wished to do for himself had he not been so stubborn.

“-What is the point if I can't make sense of you trying to leave me?"

The turmoil in your voice had been made present. One so encompassing that Soshiro couldn't ignore. And as much as it hurts you to scream. It hurt him to see you suddenly cry like this. Someone he associated as being so usually strong-willed, crumbling in a few short words from him. And suddenly, it feels as if he wants to swallow back his words. Mouth churned into regret when he had moved to take a step closer to you.

“Sweetheart, please..I-”

He shook his head. Suddenly finding himself kneeling down in front of your bed. And when your eyes had met his, it was as if his heart had stopped momentarily. Too focused on the way you had looked at him in desperation. Mixed with both physical and emotional pain.

And he had been the cause of that. Regrettably he knew he had been the cause of that.

"Is the idea of me loving you THAT terrible of a concept to you?" you spoke flimsily. Words betraying the tone you wanted to convey. And somehow you felt worse than when blood was unnaturally seeping out of your wound.

And his own body. One that betrayed his own commands, had a mind of its own. Strong arms wrapping around your bandaged ones that had still been healing from the minor cuts you had accumulated. And the warm steady beat of his heart had drowned you back into reality. Cheeks pressed against his and regrettably, soiling his jacket.

Not that he minded of course. Far too focused on wiping your tears away. Shushing you when you'd shudder from the breathless sniffles he'd been the cause of.

"Shit- no sweetheart no. I didn't mean it."

“I didn't mean it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.” His instant apologies and regrets had echoed for a few moments. The sudden urge to calm you down had him reeling just to caress your shoulders. Weary of the injuries you were faced with as you cried in his arms.

And the struggling shudders you were faced with had all been too painful to see. Comical in the way he had all but worsened your condition when stressing a healing patient had been the last thing people needed to be reminded of.

Yet here you were, struggling to even cry when every breath would agitate any bandaged injuries you'd gotten. And it had been his fault entirely.

“I'm not leaving ya. I'm right here..” He whispered. And you had forcibly glanced up. Seeing the way his distress had wrinkled those usually foxy eyes. Like he had suddenly gained a keen sense of his stupidity and finally realized that his sentiments were not helping you. And upon realization you couldn't help but feel how silly all this had been.

You would've laughed had you not wasted such excess energy into crying your heart out in front of him. Likely an accumulation from the week's worth of not being able to see each other.

That and other things, which were obvious enough.

But you spoke. Wanting to pick his thoughts apart. Reason with him the next time this may happen. And your eyes flutter away the tears as you had finally managed to calm down enough to ask him.

“Then why? Why even suggest that?” Your voice had been soft. His thumbs move to caress the stray tears away from your face. Even moving to casually use his sleeves to gently wipe your cheeks in assurance of his presence. And you close your eyes at the simple gesture. Suddenly feeling much better now that he had been so close to you like this.

Crap, he set himself up didn't he? And just when he had this all planned out too.

In the wake of your hospitalization, he had planned to leave you. Somehow make you change occupations. Maybe work for a tech company where your life wouldn't be on the line. Where you'd be far away from his life and you could live a happy, seperate life from him.

But who was he kidding? Even he thinks it's stupid. The idea of doing you the greater good.

It had sounded conclusive back then.

He'd likely die young, a Kaiju attack that he had lacked defenses in no doubt. And somehow, you'd weasel your way out and live an old happy life.

Like bronze. Tarnished but long lasting.

But you had seen through his intention. And every right to refuse such a concept had knocked him over the head. A simple shed of tears was all it took for such a carefully built wall to crumble. His resolve in shambles at the mere thought of you leaving.

And to take that away from you. To separate the both of you like that? It felt wrong. And somehow his stupidity makes him laugh.

And the next words uttered had been voluntary on his part. Sloppy but it came out from an honest place. That even he doubted its power.

"Because, it scares me how much I need you. Okay?" He leans in. Head against your own so that your noses would touch. And you could see the little cracks on that smile of his. A stark contrast to the facade of laughs he'd usually give off. And it makes your heart flutter upon such fleeting confessions.

"Just hearing that voice of yours is enough to wreck me. And ruin me for anybody else."

"And when I saw you. Layin' there with that faraway look on your eyes. I just couldn't fucking breathe."

The way his eyes had not once left yours had felt like the first time you had met him. In that room with the Captain watching your interactions.

You had been less amicable to each other by then. Always second guessing each other by investigating the little nuances of your expressions. But somehow, the difficulties in reading each other had not been so far fetched. And the longer you two would spend time together. The more you had an inkling of what the other was thinking. And eventually an unspoken understanding had come between the both of you.

One that required no words to speak. Nor assistance from anywhere else. Just you and him. Nothing more.

"What If I lose you? You're all I fucking have.."

"Soshiro.” You whispered. Suddenly feeling the weight of his words drop down on you upon his realization. And you shake your head in turn. Immediately running your hands on the soft tresses of his hair. “You’re not going to lose me.”

“And what if I did?” He was quick to interject. “What if I had been a second too late and you were killed?”

“-And yet I'm still here. See?” You moved his intertwined hands to your chest. Firmly letting him feel the pulse of your heart. A repetition had to be made in order to convince him. And if you had to do such things a million times, there was no doubt you’d do it a thousand more times.

And his hand couldn't help but press firmly. Gingerly looking everywhere to check your wellbeing. Satisfied when he had settled in your slightly puffy eyes that he had been all too remorseful of when he found it too pretty to look away from.

You leaned in. Pressing light kisses against his cheeks to calm his thoughts. The voice in the back of his head all but silenced. When the adrenaline kicked in, because somehow he found himself unfocused when he caught your lips in his.

It was short and sweet.

Far different from the many picturesque and grandiose kisses he'd read about in books. And far too slow amidst the rush hours of your working breaks. Where you'd snag a few touches here and there just to get a rise out of each other. No this had been far too different. Far too gentle than it normally was. But despite the innocence of such a contact. It had made a more lasting impact on him.

The hesitation implied vulnerability, and without it. You'd be remiss to see Soshiro's true feelings underneath it. And it makes you pull away to rub your own hands against his chest. Admiring the way his uniform had engulfed him warmly in the cold air conditioning in the room.

All that matters was that they were okay now.

All that matters is that they are together now. Is that so much to ask?

“I won't die so easily, Soshiro.” Your assurances had made him perk up. Head still leaning against yours where you could see the pretty hallmarks of his tired eyes.

“I may not be able to know..everything in that damn head of yours. But what I do know? Is that I have unwavering trust in you. And that's the only reason I made it out alive today.” Your voice had made him crack a smile. One that makes you raise a brow at him. Suddenly fixated on the way his demeanor had changed so easily when you had spoken your piece.

And Soshiro, ever the enigma that he was. Had stopped his reluctance around you. Finally getting a chance to relax as his hands slotted its way to the bounce of your cheek and jaw, which he had always found so endearing to touch and look at.

He couldn't help but run soothing circles on your flesh. A habit he might've picked up on when reading a few romances here and there.And it makes you wonder if he had always been this sweet. A layer unknown go you that you'd love to rediscover, if only he'd put down that smart mouth of his.

“I think that was ‘bout a week ago.” He corrected you. His face is as snarky as his comment. And that was enough to shake your head.

But of course, that had been too much to ask. Too far and few inbetween. You spoke too soon.

“Fine. A week ago.” You affirmed. Though this time you had rolled your eyes with a laugh of your own.

And the two of you had simply sat there. Soshiro rocking you back and forth as best he could without risking your injuries. Hands against the plush of your waistline, carefully making sure the stitches were still intact. But the warmth had remained.

This time he had been less distant. More calm and understanding like he had usually been. And that was enough for you. For now.

“Do you mean that?”

“Mean what?” You had blinked with a smile on your face. Sweet as it came, you had a viper that you knew how to use. And Soshiro wasn't ever one to stop confronting it. Even if he had to break out of his shell to ask the harder questions between you both.

“When you said you loved me.” He added.

And he wouldn't be able to miss that pretty smile forming on the corners of your lips. Leaning against him until the softness of your lips had grazed his chapped ones. Though you’d note, it was still gentle. Still his. And still yours to capture should you want it.

“Do I have to kiss you again and prove it?” You mutter out.

“Do you not want to right now?”

And without a doubt did you lean in. Capturing his lips with a crooked smile in between. Soft and sensual. And you had missed this. Missed him who had not gotten the chance to set things right by you.

How long had it been since you had taken the time to really kiss him? Without the rush of prying eyes, nor the responsibilities that came with their work. It was just a kiss, yet in this moment it felt like everything.

Slow and reassuring. Without the need of words to complicate things. It had conveyed everything he needed to know. And when you pulled back, Soshiro could see the pretty pearls of your teeth. Admiring the way your lips had bruised red from how eagerly he had captured your mouth. And he wouldn't dream of being anywhere else in the world right now. Not when you had looked so perfect. Hospital gown and all.

“Does that prove my point?”

He laughs. Something you had always thought to be pretty.

“Maybe.” The familiar trace of his hand had brushed past your hair. Straightening out the few loose strands that could obscure him from your face. And his smile, although back to the usual cat-like facade, had now softened up significantly upon your presence. And you had prided the way this man had looked at you like you had offered him the world.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at ya. I just-”

“Shh..I know.” Your hand had touched his lips. Admiring the way it too, had reddened from your previous kisses.

“I'm tougher than bronze, you know? I'm not so simple as to let a few words bend me sideways.”

“Okonogi tells me the same.”

“And right she was. You should learn a thing or two from her.” And a laugh bubbles between the two of you. He had to remind himself to save his apologies later for Okonogi. For despite her absence, even now she was playing cupid for them. The small voice in his head urging him to tell you how he truly felt.

And without warning. He managed to say it outloud.

“I love you.”

Those words had struck a melodic chord in you. Ones that made you look back at him in temporary stupor. Before finally turning giddy at the way he so gently said it. No remorse. No regret. A fact even she couldn't deface as mockery. When there'd normally be a trick of a joke involved.

And in your quiet smiles held a deep admiration for him. Ones that squeezed Soshiro's hand despite the difficulty of your injuries.

But that didn't matter. Injuries heal after all. And right now, you had been far too focused on him to mind the slowly subsiding pain on your body.

“What's this all of a sudden? You're not joking are you?” You ask cautiously. Though a smile still remained on your face. Far too elated at hearing those words. And from the look on his face, you could tell he had been serious in his admission.

“It's not sudden. I just–” Soshiro lets out a small chuckle. Not entirely sure why he feels so nervous in the wake of your question.

“I meant to say it that day. Before the Kaiju attacked. I wanted it to be perfect for ya and..” His voice stops when you lean in. Cuddling him down as best you could in the safety of the hospital's bedsheets. The understanding look in your eyes had all but told him that you knew. And it makes him think twice about having to explain things to you again. Not when you could now read him so well. Especially in the most important aspects of his life.

“I know. You don't need to tell me twice."

He heard you speak. Though the hint of playfulness in your voice hadn't subsided. A reminder that you had been slowly regaining your strength. And pretty soon, you'd be pulling him down by the collar just to kiss him breathless if you wanted to.

But for now, he was gonna have to take care of you. Take the lead and deal with your smart comments. And it makes him smile knowing he'd get to hear such witty banters from you again. More so now that you were awake.

“Really now? And I thought you'd be happy to have me say it outloud for ya.”

His chuckle had made his chest rumble. And you could feel the pleasant vibration as your head fell squarely on his chest. A roll in your eyes as you had hummed in reply.

“Well…I suppose it couldn't hurt for you to say it again.”

And he would. He'd do it as long as you'd allow him that privilege.

And this time, he too had read you like an open book. Somehow fitting perfectly in the way they understand the other without needing to speak. They needed to work on it. They needed each other more than ever before.

So it was lucky their bonds were more lasting than bronze. And fate had brought them together.

#anime #kn8 #kaiju no. 8 #hoshina soshiro x reader #soshiro hoshina #soshiro hoshina x reader #hoshina soshiro #kaiju no 8 x reader #kn8 x reader #definitely self indulgent #angst #angst with a happy ending #hurt/comfort #arguing #kn8 manga #kaiju number 8 #mina ashiro #konomi okonogi

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orbmanson7 · 6 months

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And I'm not watching the Oscars but I did hear that, for technically the first time, a 2D animated film won the best animated feature category.

I hope people understand how big of a deal that genuinely is. Disney fucking shut down their 2D studios because they didn't see merit in it anymore, they didn't think people wanted 2D anymore, and this win for The Boy and The Heron doesn't just say that the film was really good, it says audiences are enthralled and entertained by 2D just as much if not More Than 3D animation or a combination or stop motion, and so on.

It's effectively a slap in the face to these big corporations who say they're trying to pander to a wider audience by only investing in what they think will make them more money (despite the fact that 3D animation often costs way more than 2D, at least the way it's done digitally now, and can often take much longer to complete than 2D at times, too). It shows that they were wrong.

Some might say it's just because it was a big name director that garnered the success, but The Boy and the Heron did extremely well in theaters everywhere, it's not just a matter of winning awards. At the end of the day, people watched it because they liked it. The fact that it was a 2D animated film proves that this is a worthy medium and that studios shouldn't have given up on it, acting like it wasn't interesting anymore.

2D animation is incredible! So many studios, for film, television, music videos, promotional material, just about Anything - are capable of taking 2D animation and making incredible new feats with the technology that they have, or even inventing and mastering new tech to improve 2D animation in ways we've never seen before!! That should celebrated and appreciated!

2D animation is so important and it's far from dead, like these dumb corporate idiots want to think. 2D animation is amazing and thriving and it's here to stay!

#sorry i ended up rambling #i just...have a lot of feelings about 2d animation in particular haha #2d animation #the boy and the heron #oscars #animation #orbs thought bubbles

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agirlandherkinks · 9 months

Text

Hypnovisor: Beta Test (TGTF, Hypno)

James had always been a tech super-fan. The newest phone, newest headphones, shiniest laptop, he had to stay abreast of and on top of the current trends. So when he read about some fancy new VR company that wanted beta testers for a headset, provided for free (minus shipping), his vision blurred and he signed up before he even considered finishing reading the ad.

Three weeks of anticipation and waiting passed until his doorbell finally rung, accompanied by the corresponding buzz of an email notification on his phone. Scrambling from his couch he flung the apartment door open, and to his mild surprise saw that the postman was nowhere in site. There was just a nondescript cardboard box labelled "Fragile", which fortunately bore none of the expected dents and scratches one would associate with the postal service and delicate freight. Practically bouncing with undignified delight, James scooped his parcel up and dashed back inside, barely remembering to lock the door behind him.

The headset looked even better than he had imagined. Sleek plastic curves surrounded a central visor that was just translucent enough to see through, meaning you could walk around safely if you turned a program's opacity down. It fit beautifully when he tried it on, more comfortable than anything he'd ever worn. Wearing it felt wonderful and... right, somehow. His only complaint was that the black headset was decorated in hot pink highlights, although it still looked futuristic enough to sooth his fragile masculinity. His roommate and best friend Erik certainly agreed, interspersing James' insightful comments with appropriate "Ooh's" and "Aah's". Waiting for the battery to charge seemed to take a thousand years, although chatting with each other about what it could do replaced their boredom with swiftly growing excitement.

Two hours later, a soft buzz from the headset in the corner signified its charge was complete. Erik cheered, his sandy-blonde hair bouncing behind him, and even James couldn't suppress a soft whoop of excitement. Erik unplugged it and handed it to James with a flourish and a bow, who accepted it with a suitable stuffy speech. His cheeks flushed with embarrassment, but he was so giddy with anticipation he felt he could match Erik's goofiness for once. The advertisement had promised unmatched realism, a luxurious fit, and cutting-edge, groundbreaking technology. Normally James would have discounted claims like that as corporate claptrap, but the headset fit so well he actually believed the rest of it.

Booting up the headset brought a perky, relaxing jingle in his ears and wall of settings text in his vision. He would have read it, but between his own excitement and Erik's infectious enthusiasm he left the settings on default and skipped to the main menu. The feedback for the buttons was amazing, it felt just like he was pressing down on them whenever he touched one! Another little jingle sounded as he confirmed his choices, and a few games and applications bubbled up into his view, imposed over a hot pink background.

"So Erik, what do you think I should try," James asked. "We've got a music player, interior design app, some sorta idle monster game, and a few RPG's." "Surely try out the RPG's man! You've gotta see that high-definition you were yammering about when we called." Erik's voice came back surprisingly muffled, as if he was speaking down a long tunnel. "Bro, I can barely hear you, the noise-cancelling on this headset's insane! It's like I'm in a world of my own!" James took a deep breath, recovering a little of his composure. "Alright, an RPG it is. Fantasy, sci-fi, or modern day?" "Go fantasy! You know we've both got a thing for elf chiiiicks. Hell, with the kind of feedback you were telling me about, you might even get to grab her" Erik's distant voice sounded playful, with a ting of desire and jealousy. And it did make James hard, at the thought of getting to look and squeeze and fondle some busty elf bitch, made entirely to his wishes~

To James' horror a quiet moan escaped his lips, accompanied by faint hysterical laughter from his friend. Brushing it off angrily, he slammed the icon for 'Silverflame: A Magical Journey' (the button felt like thick moss to his touch). Instantly a soft flute begun to play in his ears, accompanied by the gentle lull of a harp and a quiet sparkling. James felt himself relax, all the tension draining out of his body. Erik must have noticed too, because James heard his laughter die down to be replaced with a slightly concerned silence. "Don't worry man," James said, "music's just really pretty..." He trailed off with a slight giggle, but heard Erik give an affirmative just before a silky, sultry voice started to speak.

"Welcome traveler, to the beautiful world of Silverflame. An untamed paradise where strange beasts roam the land, noble adventurers go forth in search of treasure, and the most wonderful magic [James shuddered] is woven. You are the latest brave, beautiful heroine [Heroine? Shouldn't I get to choose my character's gender first?] to step foot into this land. But first, tell us a bit about who you really are."

Pink sparkles rained across the screen, superimposing his view of a vibrant meadow with a series of stats. Physique, IQ, Wisdom, and Charisma, fairly standard stuff. And next to it, a human man with a blank, slightly happy expression on his face [...did he look familiar?]. James gasped, he looked just like a real person! Erik was suitably impressed by this information, and urged him to pick some stats so he can get to the body modification. "You can always change them later man, might as well pick a couple of stats now and get a move on. Sounds like you're not gonna get to pick your gender for a while, which kinda sucks. Buuut if we're being horny about this, you might as well go for a slut scaffold so you make less changes later." James chuckled at this, remembering the build they discussed one night while both sloshed beyond belief. For this game it would be high Physique and Charisma, low IQ and Wisdom. James touched the slider for Physique, and gasped as he felt himself feel... better than he had in a long time.

Not trusting his senses any more, and worrying about Erik being exposed to whatever was happening from the other side of the headset, James brushed off his concerned questions (which he could barely hear now, past the soothing, soothing, music) and suggested he went to the toilet, since he'd been holding it in since he got here. Erik grumbled at missing out, but mercifully left. James was actively sweating from what just went through his body, but couldn't muster the energy or concentration to feel the level of panic he knew he should be. The music was just so, so calming, that fear was harder to feel than usual. The prompt told him he still had to change two more stats, so he decided to turn down Wisdom. He gasped again and his vision went blurry, and when it cleared he felt a bit, fuzzier? In the head. But it wasn't too bad, in fact it was perfectly manageable. He felt even calmer now, so maybe changing another stats would make him feel better. Why not IQ? He tapped the slider.

He groaned as an immense pressure wrapped around his brain. Thoughts, aspirations, memories felt like they were melting from his head faster than they appeared. The pressure seemed like it lasted forever, but eventually it trailed off and he was left panting in his chair. It had felt, really good? Like, tots good, even. James giggled to himself. Something was different about him, but he couldn't think what. Oh well, it'll probably come to him later. He squealed in delight as he realized he could get a step closer to the body modification page, although he looked longingly at the IQ slider. He could come back to it later, for now it was time to make his super-hot elf slut a body!

James clapped to himself with delight as a cute little melody played, a shower of sparkles spiraled [spiraled...] across the screen, and the man on the side moved to the center of the screen. "Firstly", the sultry voice said, "choose what race you want to be." That was an easy choice. He clicked on the 'Elf' button, and shivered as he felt tingles run through his body, intensifying in his ears. Reaching up to touch them, he inhaled as he felt long, pointed tips. In fact, his whole body seemed a bit slimmer. This doesn't quite feel right... he thought. Oh I know! It must be making me an elf too! Maybe we'll be in a party together! Between the strange fuzziness and the pulsating heat in his groin, James quickly flicked to the next page and made his choices. Long, silver hair, gorgeous big purple eyes, and some giant perky lips. "Combination unlocked!" the narrator exclaimed, "+1 Charisma, -1 Wisdom!" James giggled again as the mental fog settled a little tighter around his brain and naughty thoughts about cute girls and boys filled his brain. Boys? Well I guess I've never minded swinging both ways... This felt natural to him, because of course he'd always been bisexual. Next screen!

"Choose your voice young heroine," the woman commanded. James felt a little strange, like her voice was echoing around his head. And why were the sparkles still there, spinning and spinning around the screen. He felt confused, but knew he had to obey that voice. He picked the sexiest combination for his own voice; high pitched, breathy, perky. "Combination unlocked! +1 Charisma, -1 Int." He moaned as that wonderful pressure wrapped his brain and his weekend plans changed to eyeing hunks at the beach. Girls were cool and all, but men had always been more interesting to him [and their pulsing, hard...].

"Now heroine, can you tell me: Are you a girl, or a boy?" The question sent shock waves through his brain. He was a he... right? Why did it feel like there was some longing, some need to acknowledge the woman in him... her? The fog, the music, the spirals, all the feelings he had been having, James could hardly think. Maybe he should think less. Being a girl sounded fun, it's just a character after all. And he needed to be sexy. "Wonderful choice young lady! Now, are you a dominatrix, a super-switch, or a bimbo slut?" Bimbo slut~ James giggled as the words echoed in her brain. She was a bit of a slut, now that she thought about it. It felt odd to pick it, but why not for funsies? "Bimbo slut selected! Wonderful choice, just wonderful. Hold still while your stats are adjusted, and then we'll begin on giving you the perfect, sexy body you've always wanted."

The spirals filled her view and began increasing in speed. James was taken aback at first, but quickly felt oddly calm and receptive to that sultry voice.

"Physique +1, Physique +1, Physique +1." James felt wonderful, like every ache and blemish in his body had faded away.

"Wisdom -1, Wisdom -1." Thinking was fuzzy, but Jamella felt so content she didn't care.

"Charisma +1, Charisma +1, Charisma +1, Charisma +1. Charisma +1." Jamella gasped as visions of sexy men, pecs and abs and juicy, throbbing cocks filled her mind. A desperate heat filled her, and she began touching her groin against her will to try and ease it.

"IQ -1." She moaned, feeling light.

"IQ-1." Empty. She was so, wonderfully empty.

"IQ -1." This was like, so much funsies! She didn't know what was going on, but everything felt so nice~

"IQ -1. Congratulations Ella, you now have the 'Bimbo Slut' build."

Ella giggled absently. Thinking was like, so hard, and she felt like, so hard~. The fun spirals had disappeared... But the nice lady was talking to her again! With great effort, she listened in. "Now that your mental changes are complete, it's time for the physical changes!" Ella rubbed her thighs together and cheered in excitement. She couldn't wait to have more fun! "Unless you choose so now, the process will be au-to-ma-tic [...why was she using such big words?]. You can choose to take over at any time, or wait until the end and adjust as you please [...please. That word felt funny in her brain]".

"No user input detected. Body adjustment commencing."

A nice shiver went through Ella's body as she felt her headset warm against her face. Looking at the boring young man she'd begun to customize (her reflection, of course), she couldn't wait to begin! She sighed happily as waves of pretty silver hair drifted into her view and cascaded down her back. It felt especially nice against her smooth, soft skin, and she couldn't help but gently shake her head to watch it sway. A cool feeling brought her attention to her face, and the alluring amethyst eyes now set in it. Her face itself became much more elegant [but cutesy, too!], and she puckered her lips as a lovely pressure made them swell and bulge out, giving her a sexy and kissable pout [the boys'll love this look! boys~]. She felt herself shrink a few centimeters, gulping as her Adam's apple disappeared into her body. In fact, her whole body had become even more slender, with narrow shoulders, adorably small hands [pretty purple nails!], and a tiny little waist. She gasped, then clasped her hands over her mouth in delight. Her voice was so high and cutesy! She couldn't stop herself from giving out tiny, high-pitched giggles, just to hear how cute she was!

"Basic body structure altered. Adjusting outfit in preparation for primary and secondary sexual characteristics."

Ella ooh'ed appreciatively as a stream of sparkles enveloped her body. And when they disappeared, she squealed in delight! Her drab t-shirt and denim shorts were gone! In their place was a beautiful silver mini-dress that shimmered like starlight when she moved. She frowned in vexation, though. The plunging chest and shoulder-less design was very pretty, but her chest was flat! [shouldn't I have tiddies? The boys won't like me like this...] And the way it clung to her waist and hips would have been sexy, but as it was there was barely any difference between them! Her ass wasn't nearly big enough to justify how the dress cut off barely past it, and with how tight the fabric was Ella could see how achingly hard she was [wait, why do I have a cock? I'm supposed to get cock! In my mouth, in my ass, in my tight little pussy~]. It wasn't right!

"Thank you for your patience sweetie. Optimal figure calculated. Prepare for adjustment of sexual characteristics."

Ella let out a moan as a wave of heat and pleasure washed over her. With how horny she was she could barely keep her eyes open, but she knew she wanted to watch herself become the sexy little [cum] slut she was meant to be [I want it... I want to be~]. The heat settled in her hips, her ass, and her chest, and she moaned again as the changes begun.

Her nipples grew first, more than doubling in size and stiffening through the soft fabric of her dress. Tentatively touching them induced a gasp of pleasure [so nice~] and sent her rocking backwards. The motion made her giggle, because in that time she'd grown a cute pair of B-cup breasts that jiggled when she rocked. Jiggle makes me giggle. I like giggling. I like jiggling. Ella nodded thoughtfully to herself, feeling very wise. Her boobies grew to C-cups. She jiggled some more. She giggled some more.

A tightness around her hips distracted Ella from her tiddies. They were growing! She groaned as fabric and flesh tightened around them, too euphoric to feel pain. Sliding her hands from her waist to her hips made her squeal happily. She had such a sexy hourglass figure, she knew any girl worth her money would be jealous [and the boys would wanna hold me and squeeze me and fuck me raw]. Thighs thickening dramatically in response to her growth, she slapped her ass in impatience. Why won't it get bigger already!

But get bigger it did, swelling out in response to her touch. She fell forward as sheer pleasure blanketed her mind and weakened her knees. Squishing her boobies against the ground made her feel even nicer, until she was panting and moaning for somebody to help, to hit her again and make her bigger~

A slap landed on her booty, and she groaned in delight as it and her thighs swelled again. More. More! I NEED MORE! She moaned in ecstasy as blow after blow landed, making her swell and grow and grow and swell and feel so gooooood! Her tits inflated to D, then E-cups [good for the boys. I can jiggle so well for them~]. Her hips widened and thighs thickened, until she looked ridiculously large compared to her waist [ridicu... ridic... really, really sexy...] And her ass kept growing, and growing, and growing and growing and growing and growing! Tighter! Around my cock! Cock... I... oh~ Too... too... much! Too much! I'm~ I'm!

OooOOoOoOOooOoOoooOOOOOHHH~

Ella screamed in delight as she came, just cumming and cumming and cumming her tiny little brain out.

"Wisdom -1. IQ -1. Charisma +1. Charisma +1."

She was desperate, humping against the ground as the flow of cum abated from her cock. Everything she had been was flowing out of her messy stupid brain, and everything that she should be was coming in. Boys... Cock... Need fuck... Breed~ I'm such a dumb little cum slut~ She giggled to herself.

"Final adjustment required."

Ella stood up shakily, the bottom of her dress a cum-soaked mess. She squealed with delight as the mental fog settled even tighter and she felt an intense heat in her groin. She could see the tops of nipples trying to break free from her dress, and could feel the air drift over her ass, which had mostly escaped the fabric in her growth. So sexy. Hehe~ Boy can take me~ Don't even need dress off~ Thinking hard... Her ass and hips had pulled up so much fabric that her cock was visible now, deflating and still leaking from her orgasm, but she gasped in pleasure as it began rising up again. And, as she felt something long and hard brush her booty [cock? Boys? Fuck?].

A pressure like hands on her shoulders forced her to her knees, and she whimpered in desire as she felt an unseen cock touch her cheek. At the same time, something began intensely stimulating her own. She reflexively opened her mouth in a moan, but was cut off as she felt the cock shove inside [Feels~ Feels!].

All thought stopped.

Her mind was blank, full of pleasure and desire and happiness. Her cock felt good like it never had before, and the dick in her mouth tasted wonderful~ This was what Ella was made for, what she was meant to be. Feeling good, feeling sexy, feeling a pleasant emptiness that could only be filled with cock. Her haze reached a crescendo. Dimly she was aware of her own cries of ecstasy, muffled by the cock fucking her mouth and mind, as she came harder than she even had before. And as she came, her dick shrunk with each spurt until it went inside her [inside me!]. The cock withdrew from her mouth, filling her with a desperate longing. Emma moaned for her unseen hero, then gasped as she felt him once more. And blinked in surprise as the pretty meadow and her sexy reflection disappeared.

She was kneeling on the floor of an unfamiliar room. Shaking off a little of her confusion [don't need know much anyways...], she gasped as the tell-tale smell of pre-cum filled her nose. There was a man standing in front of her!

Sandy-blonde hair. Body like a surfer hunk! Naked. With a massive, sexy cock, dripping with her saliva and it's own juices. Ella moaned in desire, falling on all fours. Visibly trembling with lust, he tenderly cupped her cheek and slowly moved behind her.

Touching her with his [cock!].

Ever so gently, on the edge of her [...pussy!!!!]

He rammed inside her, and she screamed as an absolute feeling of rightness, of sexiness and pleasure and single-minded happiness rushed through her [MORE! HARDER! COCKKKK~]. Riding his dick she felt herself go into a trance, with nothing, absolutely nothing, disturbing her feelings. Ever. This was right. Ella moaned and surrendered to herself, drifting away on her lover's cock and mindless pleasure.

#hypnosis #tgtf #brain drain #breast expansion #hip expansion #ass expansion #hypnok1nk #bimboification #expansion #ally's kinks

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thrutheriff-if · 1 year

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Thru the Riff is an 18+ interactive fiction revolving around music and the paranormal. It follows you, a journalist working for Star-Dust Magazine, in your newest gig of “interviewing” the members of the “hottest rock band” around, MANHUNT. You’ll work to uncover the bands secrets in your own… creative ways, and find out the truths as to why their stardom is surrounded by scandal.

Content Warnings: violence, foul language, suggestive themes, substance abuse, possession and other paranormal related themes, and more.

You’ve spent the past three years of your life trying to climb the corporate ladder at Star-Dust Magazine, a magazine focusing on the secrets and personal lives of the biggest bands and musicians of your time. You were hired as a journalist alongside your best friend, and have worked on countless jobs and interviews together, most of them being your best work despite your bosses trepidation.

However, your most recent jobs have seemingly all ended as busts, your boss describing them as “fluff pieces” rather than the raw, true pieces that she wants. She’s given you an ultimatum: give her something truly fitting for Star-Dust, or she’ll refer you to a different career path.

Seemingly at rock bottom, you’re given a golden opportunity — MANHUNT, one of the biggest rock bands around, has gone viral for a scandal revolving around one of the members volatile departure from the band. It’s the perfect opportunity to use the bands mystery to your advantage.

The bad news? MANHUNT has never accepted written or filmed interviews that they can’t control, and they’ve refused countless interview invitations from Star-Dust in the past. The good news? Now with their rhythm guitarist very publicly leaving the band, they have to open auditions to replace her.

If only things could be as simple as they seem.

Customize your main characters gender, pronouns, physical appearance, personality and views. As well as choose their skill and interest in music, and their belief in the occult. Do they like the kind of music MANHUNT creates? Can they play any instruments themselves? Do they believe in any sort of occult or spiritual beings? How do those questions tie together? Only one way to find out.

Audition to join the band! MANHUNT needs a new rhythm guitarist, and you see this as the perfect opportunity to get an insider look on the band. Will you be genuine or secretive with your audition? Meet your future bandmates and impress or disappoint them.

Choose from four romance options; MANHUNT’s distant lead singer who has more secrets than they let on, MANHUNT’s drummer who has integrated you into the band without complaint, your guitar tech who has taken a special interest in you, or your best friend who has tagged along for the job.

Develop friendships with the rest of the band and help or destroy MANHUNT’s public image.

Oh, and don’t forget to write your piece for Star-Dust, your job literally depends on it. Find out as much as you can. Find out too much. Don’t get hurt.

Maxim / Maxine “Max” Hawke (RO, gender selectable) — The rather broody lead singer of MANHUNT. Max is the perfect fit for a rockstar, broody in their personal life but an all-out force of energy on stage, wooing crowds of thousands (and mortifying their parents) without issue. As personable as they appear to be on stage, they seem like they want nothing to do with you. It’ll be difficult getting close to them, especially with how odd they seem to be acting offstage.

Roman / Romona Woods (RO, gender selectable) — MANHUNT’s drummer who has a roguish appearance with a heart of gold. They may not look like the most approachable of people, but they’ll surprise you with their boundless energy and bubbly social skills. They’re the most accepting of your arrival to the band so far and are genuinely excited to get to know you.

Beck Moreau (RO, they/them) — Your own personal guitar tech! Well, not technically yours as they used to be Willa’s tech before she left but, regardless they’re tagging along to MANHUNT’s shows and maintaining your equipment for you. They’re loud and can be pretty irritating, and they seem to have a special interest in pushing your buttons. Can you handle the headache they give you?

Gabriel / Gabrielle Moretti (RO, gender selectable) — Your quiet, kind hearted best friend from your childhood. The two of you have been thick as thieves since you were young, and somehow you found yourselves tackling the same career path in adulthood. They’re kind and have been there for you throughout your struggles working for Star-Dust. They decided to come along with you on your newest job to “keep you safe” but, is that really… it?

… and be prepared to meet the rest of the band!

Finn Kellett (he/him), MANHUNT’s perpetually tired manager, Nex Warren (he/they), MANHUNT’s apathetic bassist who couldn’t care less about your arrival, Juliet Beckford (she/her), MANHUNT’s energetic lead guitarist who has a special interest in the unknown, and Willa Perez (she/her), MANHUNT’s rhythm guitarist before you came along, of whom you know very little about.

Author’s Note: Thru the Riff is a passion project of mine (Wil) and Elliot’s, so development will be entirely based on our free time and understanding of how to create our first interactive fiction. We hope you’ll enjoy what we create!

#interactive fiction #interactive novel #interactive game #choice of games #cog #cog game #interact if #interact-if #dashingdon #if wip #interactive fiction wip #upcoming if #hosted games #if #thrutheriff #thrutheriff if

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kingshovelbug · 7 months

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im sorry but i need to geek out somewhere and screaming into the void on tumblr is less likely to get me flayed than on twitter, especially if i get terms wrong. plus i can do a read more and yall can click into the tech talk if you want to verse it bombarding your twitter timelines

so idk if i only liked it or if i actually put it in my queue but i saw a post that talked about a few pieces of tech that focus on user repairs and being sustainable (fairphone and frameworks laptop) and after doing some more research into what they have to offer i actually really excited that these products are finely hitting the us market and that people are moving away from the belief that super smooth streamlined glassy = the future. being able to reliably repair and keep what you have alive verse throwing the whole thing away when maybe all you needed to do is add more ram to your current laptop (something that i would do with my laptop to keep using it for a few more years if it wasnt glued shut and i was at risk of cracking the screen) or swap out a fuse.

i know big corporations dont like it but i truly do believe with how much tech we use on a daily basis that the way that we are going to be more environmentally friendly is to move back to tech that we can hang onto for as long as we can and to recycle and then reuse what we cant. like with the frameworks laptop. i saw that they just partnered with coolermaster to create a case specifically so that you can reuse you motherboard, cpu, etc and make a portable workstation. you could dual wield with the laptop you just upgraded if you want to dedicate specific tasks to one or the other. they also specifically mentioned that you could screw it into the back of a monitor and create your own all in one. guys thats cool as shit??? if you had a 3d printer and some time you could even create that yourself

on top of the actual hardware part moving to open source programs when your able. when i update my desktop i plan on running linux. it might have a learning curve compared to windows but in terms of performance??? ive heard that it runs smoother even on older machines, that its more efficient because isnt running stuff in the background that tracks your data and shit. now i understand that not everyone can do that because there are some programs that dont play nice with linux but for my needs at least it does everything i would need it to. and maybe a couple years down the road we do figure out how to run these programs on certain flavors of linux since its open source and people fiddle with it so much. (still looking for alternatives to like word and excel though, i use google docs since its free but i want to move away from them as much as i can too since they laid of their youtube music team (i believe?? it might of been a different branch) for trying to unionize)

if anyone knows of any other smaller companies that actually focus on sustainability and user repairability please let me know. theres certain pieces of tech that i think are now unfortunately behind a software repair paywall, things that used to be just machines and are gaining more bells and whistles like cars and refrigerators if that makes sense. but the more we push for these things to be repairable by us the consumers id hope that would change, or there would at least be options that dont need specific companies to repair them or else they blow up

#personal

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royaltyfreemusic-alexrufire · 5 months

Video

youtube

Soft AI Tech & Science - Background Music

►►https://1.envato.market/4P9Wgn

►Corporate tech music with a soft easy theme for technology projects, creative movies or futuristic videos.

#royalty free music #audiojungle #corporate tech music #envato elements

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soapdispensersalesman · 11 months

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#Bandcamp #Music industry #Bandcamp Daily #tech #staff #writers #editors #editorial #songtradr #Epic Games #layoffs #laid off #corporate greed #capitalism #music platform #platform #music #industry

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magicdustsworld · 2 months

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A Fairytale Wedding (1)

Gojo Satoru x Fem!Reader

Synopsis: In which, a sacred bond tied Gojo Satoru with his beloved wife. The bond always existed, so did the promises which only told tales of love. It was their happy ending. Right?

Tropes: Drama, Angst, smut

Warnings: cheating/extramarital affair, explicit smut, strong language, drinking, overall toxic relationship and friendship dynamics, OOC, slight possessive!Gojo, slight Gojo x OC, no curse AU, usage of nicknames, no mentions of y/n.

Word count: 4.6k

A/N: I have abandoned by previous account due to some issues, however I want to complete the series and imo it was better to keep all the parts in one account. Therefore, this is only a repost.

Divider credits: @cafekitsune

"Gojo Satoru, do you take this beautiful lady as your wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better and for worse, in sickness or in health, to love, cherish and honour her till death do you apart?"

Cerulean blue eyes gleamed under artificial lights, holding such tenderness while he looked at her like she was the only woman in the world. With a breathy sigh, the words escaped his lips.

"I do."

A pleased smile formed on the priest's lips and he nodded, "With the power bestowed upon me by thy lord, holding the almighty and everyone present here as witnesses for this holy matrimony, I pronounce you both as Husband and wife." He walked over to the side, finishing, "You may kiss the bride."

The ivory haired man stepped up, pulling up her veil as another gentle smile graced his lips. With a tender grip on her chin, he urged her to look at him.

Blush dusted her pale cheeks, eyes drifting away to hide her shyness which ended as soon as his lips met hers. Long slender fingers intertwined with his, naturally full red lips pressing against her husband. He tugged on her long hair, looping his arm around her waist as he pulled her closer and angled her mouth; deepening the kiss.

The church bell rang followed by randomized claps of all the guests. The bridesmaid and the groom's men cheered on as the melodious music played on the background.

A union was made.

Another couple tied into this sacred bond of marriage. With a whole life ahead to walk together, to love and cherish each other till the end of time. Making promises to stay together no matter the circumstance, promise to create a family and grow old together and promise to always be truthful to one another.

A fairytale wedding commenced with a happy ending.

You snorted looking at the aforementioned couple sitting together with their family.

Tilting your glass of champagne, you indulged yourself in a sip; the cool liquid burnt your throat. Your eyes flickered to the bride – Kazumi Gojo, your best friend. Oh how much she resembled the champagne.

The epitome of sweetness and innocence with erratic bursts of the hidden flame in her heart, similar to the random spiciness of the drink.

You witnessed how her husband made her laugh as she gracefully placed a hand over her lips - an act of elegance. That was the thing, Kazumi was the woman every man wants and whom every woman aspire to be. The touch of innocence with the fiery spirit, generous and selfless, elegance radiating with every move; a beauty sculpted by the God himself. Maybe he was creating his bride but for some miscalculation, she was sent to the mortal world.

Wonder what the miscalculation could be? Oh you know very well what that is… she is your best friend after all. Wouldn't be nice if you didn't know her flaws now, would it?

A smirk formed on your lips as you watch the new couple interact amongst each other. To any on-looker, they look like the IT couple. The COO of the Gojo Corporation, wedded to the daughter of the CEO of Tech domain.

Elites marrying elites.

Nothing new, they lived in their own world after all. A world in which you'll never belong. A world whose residents would look down on you like you are some street rat. A world where conversations would never suit your taste nor your style.

Nothing to fret your head over or throw a tantrum though, you already have everything you wanted. A high paying job in a good company, a three bedroom apartment in a modest neighborhood, a good circle of friends and…

"Need some company?"

You are pulled back in reality when the voice reached your ears - Suguru Geto, the best man of this wedding. He stood before you in his black tuxedo. Instead of the usual smile on his lips, they were contorted into a straight line; neutrality wasn't his best take, to be honest.

You offered him a lazy smile, sipping on your drink, "Ah- lovely to see you here, Suguru." You cross your legs one over another as Suguru stepped up, turning his back to the bar counter, leaning on it. "I thought you'd be accompanying Satoru."

"Would have but he is busy with his wife," He informed after ordering some whiskey for himself.

"What a boomer," You sucked in your cheeks, humming at nothing. "I would have expected for you and him to get married, honestly."

He raised an eyebrow, taking a sip of his whiskey, "You think so?"

"I do, you both would look good as a couple."

He snorted, "Well… that's a compliment if you say it." Glancing at the couple for a brief moment, his eyes settled back on you. "You look calm."

"Hmm," Your smile broadened as you face him, "My best friend just got married, I should be happy and I am." You tipped your head to the side, "What else did you expect?"

He stared at you wordlessly, shaking his head as he gets rid of any particular thoughts. "Nothing, you look fine. You are fine."

"Did you expect some sort of retort? Tantrums, maybe?

"I know you enough…" Certainty was clear in his voice then he sighed. "Enough to know that you wouldn't resort to those reactions."

A sly smirk curves into your lips, "I wouldn't expect anything less from my friend now, would I?"

The ghost of a smile that fell on his face didn't elude you. You chuckled at his silence, pushing the glass of champagne against your lips. Gulping the remaining drink in one go, your red matte lipstick stained the brim red; wiping it away with the tip of your thumb.

You ordered yourself another and Suguru questioned again, "Do you really think alcohol will make it easier for you?"

You snickered, "Absolutely not, but–" You paused glancing at the smiling couple surrounded by guests offering them their blessings and wishes. A distaste filled your mouth yet you refrained from showing any unease on your visage, "But it does give me a kick, makes things interesting." You finished as the bartender arrived with your drink.

"Feelings aren't that easily buried."

"Hmm? you must know a lot about feelings then."

His eyes flickered to a certain brunette woman across the room before returning to you. "Maybe." He gulped down a shot of whiskey. Throwing his head back, he exhaled loudly, "How long do you want to continue this?"

"Don't know," You ran your fingers through your hair, untangling the knots. "As long as I can."

"You are just looking for trouble." He straightened up, grey irises held concern. A type of concern you should pay heed to as your rendezvous was stretching for far too long and it was a time to stop. "Do you even know what will happen if anyone finds out?"

"You know everything."

"Aside me." He sighed. "Just let this charade drop already. He's married now, why go after him?"

"Now, now, Suguru–" A playful yet innocent expression fell on your features. "Is it really me who is going after him?" His eyes narrowed and you motion for him to take a peek aside as Satoru and Kazumi walked towards you both. "Just watch and enjoy the show like always."

You turn to them, a bright, fake smile curving on your lips as you get down from the barstool, "Congratulations to the new couple."

"Right, congratulations!" Suguru chimed in.

As soon as the pleasantries end, Kazumi spent no time in engulfing you in a hug as she whispers near your ear, "I still can't believe it. I married him finally, he's mine." There's obvious excitement in her voice, she pulled away and gazed at you with so many emotions that you almost feel pity towards her. Keyword: almost.

Concealing your actual thoughts you gripped her shoulders, "Why not? He is all yours now, isn't it?" You move your eyes to her husband who had engaged in a conversation with Suguru. He seemingly understood the motive and direction of your statement. Why won't he? He had played this game with you; more times than he can count.

"He is," Kazumi beamed stepping back and wrapping her arm around her husband's. Satoru smiles while gazing at her lovingly.

There's a show unwrapping before the crowd but they still choose to remain ignorant.

If you were just another friend of theirs, you'd assume that the affectionate gaze lingering of her is real. Only that you aren't just a friend. The silence of Satoru even after your question just made the gears turn in your brain. You needed to play your cards right, after all there's a man beside, who you got to entertain.

"You both look really good together," There's a look of fury which momentarily escapes the groom's façade and you mindfully pat yourself in the back. "I never thought this day would come when I watch my best friend getting married."

She grinned, tightening her grip on Satoru's arm, "Neither did I but… here we are now."

"We sure are, dear." Satoru replies, placing his hand over hers.

"You are truly the one for Satoru, the only one."

"I know, I love him and he loves me back." Kazumi’s doe eyes filled with tenderness before she took a proper glimpse at you, “That’s a beautiful blue dress you are wearing. Its designer isn’t it?”

“A designer would know designs anywhere,” You shrugged, running your thumb over the fabric near your waist, “It is designer, yes. Someone... gifted it to me.”

That must have been surprising. She gasped, "Someone? Your boyfriend?"

“Well…” You leaned back on the counter, “No not my boyfriend, but yeah… we are close.” You could feel Satoru’s glare on you even without looking and that just surged the fire burning inside you.

You loved playing this game and from the light snickered that reached your ears, belonging to the man beside you - you know you are doing it right. Just as always.

“He seems special if he gifts you such expensive dresses.” Satoru spoke, catching both your and Kazumi's attention. Well, two can play this game.

He took a step towards you. "I can say that both of you are indeed close."

Suguru hid the audible snort by a cough as he looks away.

At times, he has found himself wondering why his best friend didn’t take up acting instead of his family business. He sure had the looks and skills for it but… that’s a topic for another day. There are numerous times when he found himself pitying Kazumi, a part of him urged him to tell her the truth but the twisted part of his mind overpowered which frantically yelled – No. Besides, he enjoyed this back and forth drama once in a while.

Why would he take away his source of entertainment?

“He is special, very special.” You answered. This game just gets good every passing second and the twisted part of you hopes that it never ends.

"Say are you meeting with him, tonight?"

You humed, taking a look at Kazumi then you clicked your tongue. An annoyance tinged your voice when you stated, "I don't know… its up to him Though from what I assume he would be busy tonight."

"Not as busy to keep a gorgeous woman like you waiting."

You raised an eyebrow, "You mean it?"

"I do." His voice is a hushed whisper, the smirk playing on his lips.

A silence befell over the four of you, the background noises being of the guests does little to remove the tension. For a second, you think that Kazumi might be on the same page as the three of you but then your eyes falls on her and... she's smiling. You could heqr Suguru curse under his breath and you suppressed the urge to snort.

Taking a step away from them, your eyes met with Kazumi's,"I am kind of tired, would excuse myself to my suite for the rest of the night."

"What? So soon? I wanted you to be one of the last ones leaving," Her eyebrows scrunched up, a whine laced her tone.

"Sorry," You paused, "You can't have everything you want."

Her frown deepened but before she could speak, you wished her and her husband; marking it the end of your night.

You walked away from the designated reception hall as the cold air of the corridors hits your face.

Liberating.

You didn't know you were suffocating yourself until you stepped away. You don't belong among those elites - that's a thing you'll never defy.

Pushing past a strand of hair behind your ear, you step into the elevator and click your room floor. A part of you wonders if he'd really meet you tonight or he said that to only play your game. From your last encounter - the previous night.

"Let's end this. I am done playing this stupid game with you."

Stupid, you scoffed. As if he wasn't the one who came up to you in the first place?

You sighed, leaning back on the elevator wall as you wiped your face. Tiring. Truly it was.

You walked out of the elevator and into your room - just closing the door without the lock. Taking a peek at the time, you decide on twenty minutes. If in the next twenty minutes he doesn't show up then you'd take it that he's adamant on ending things for once and for all. Even though the thought clawed at your heart as the seething envy towards your best friend skyrocketed, a tear slids down your eye. Harshly you wipe it away.

There was no point in spilling tears over a man who doesn't love you

You aren't dumb, you know Satoru Gojo harboured no genuine feelings for you. It’s just a game for him, a game he has recently found himself interested. Oh and look… he found you.

You – an interesting partner to play with. You kept him on your toes, your witty retorts just kept him on the edge and you could get by with openly flirting with him.

You knew falling for such a man brings nothing but trouble.

But what can you do? You are just another helpless girl who’s affected by his charms. You could never have him, you know that. Knew that from the first day you went behind your best friend’s back and slept with him. You knew he’d never be yours completely.

You can’t have everything you want.

The annoying voice rang in your ears and you have to force your second thoughts to shut up. Yes, you knew you can’t have him. But you did want him, so you’ll just take whatever little amount of him that you can have and be done with it.

If that makes you a fool, so you are.

Your train of thoughts were broken as a pair of strong arm wrapped around your waist, pulling your back against a muscular chest. The familiar smell of cedar and pine filled your nostrils as a relieved sigh escaped your lips.

Satoru grinned at the sound, running his nose along your neck, inhaling in your fragrance, “Missed me?”

“Hah!” You scoffed, “You wish."

“Ouch- that hurts my feelings, darling.” He pushed your hair to one side, pressing a kiss upon your back.

“Deserved,” You rolled your eyes, “For a second, I thought you were actually ending things with me.”

He turned you around, and damn. The darkened look of lust in his eyes were enough to make your legs go weak. “I would have,” He stated, his smirk broadening, “Then you show up wearing this, I can’t help myself.”

You raised your eyebrow, slightly smirking, “Can’t help yourself? Is that right?” You chuckled, “Do I have the great Satoru Gojo weak just by wearing a dress?”

His forefinger traced your spine, stopping at the dip of your hips. He leaned down leaving an inch of space over your lips, “I would let it slide this time just cause you look so gorgeous.”

With that, his lips fell on yours.

You instantly kissed him back, tugging on his collar as you pulled him closer. His calloused palm slides down your body, caressing the curves which were elevated by your dress. They rest on your ass and he lifts you up. You wrapped your legs against his waist, he started to walk to your bed; all while his mouth was on yours, tongue invading and tasting each corner of you. You could feel his bulge pressing against your clothed core, just the thought accompanied by the countless memories of his cock stretching you out only fuelled your arousal.

He laid you down on the silken sheets before his lips left yours, attacking your jaw and then down your neck. You couldn't help the wanton moans escaping your lips as his sinfully skilled hands rubs on your clit through the fabric of your panties. He smirked against your neck, leaving a hickey on your collar bone.

"You’ll have a hard time trying to hide that, tomorrow." He whispered near your ear yet you were too drunk to register his words. In the back of his mind, he hopes you’d not use your concealer.

Though you do find some rationality when the idea of privacy suddenly arose from somewhere. “Wa-wait, the door-"

“Locked.” Satoru shut you up with a kiss again, pulling down the strap of your dress. You groaned against his mouth as you heard a rip and you dig your palm into his biceps over the fabric of his shirt. Despite it being a protest, he only took take as his cue to kiss you deeply. His hand reached down to your ass and he gave it a squeeze. Your mouth opened wide as he pushed his tongue inside.

Satoru didn't even understand why you were even protesting. He bought you that dress, he could just rip it whenever he wants. And he wanted to do that from the time he saw you sitting among the guests. The twisted part of him urged him to go on, rip that dress from you and take you right in front of everyone. Well, that would have been a way to keep those other guys from ogling at you.

A rage settles in him when he remembers the very obvious looks you received from the men around. You belong to him. What gave them any right to even look at you in that way?

He pressed onto your clit harder as you moan into his mouth. Taking the wet splotch on your panties as a sign of victory, he wasted no time before yanking the fabric and freeing your core for his eyes. He entered one finger inside of you, cursing at the feeling of tightened walls. Pumping his digit in and out of your dripping cunt until you were a moaning mess underneath him. He added another then another and your velvet walls clamped around him with an urgency till he could feel himself straining against his briefs.

"Tell me, princess," He murmured near your ear, nipping on your earlobe. "Tell me, can anyone else can make you feel like this?"

Breathy moans left your lips, face painting red from the stimulation. You closed your eyes shut as beads of sweat dripped down your forehead. The pace of his fingers inside you paved little way for your lust drunk mind to contemplate his words. You did understand the meaning yet theability to muster a reply was seized from you.

"Answer me," He pushed on as he slowed down the pace of his fingers causing you to whine as you jerked your hips towards him.

"Ugh– Satoru," You groaned glaring at the man above you.

"Does any of the guys you were flirting with could ever touch you like this?" He raised an eyebrow, drawing circles on your clit. "Can they make you cum the way I can?"

Flirting? You wanted to scoff at his audacity to assuming you were flirting with others when its him who got married to another woman. He's acting possessive and it drives you mad on how can he be such an asshole and still- still it had you aroused. You were too far down the line to think straight so you decide to give him just what he wanted.

"No one," You answered quietly, "No one but you."

You gasedp when Satoru’s mouth latches on your erected nipples and he increases the speed again. You tug on his hair as he groans with your nipple in mouth while fondling your other breast.

“Ah- fuck! Sato-ru… need you.” You managed to say in between your moans, “Please.”

You were just asking him to fuck you dumb and who was he to deny you of that when you asked so nicely. He discarded his pants, taking off his shirt and pulls down his briefs. His rock, hard cock sprang out and he spitted on his hand, coating the length with its lubrication. Positioning himself between your legs, he entered you roughly.

The pain mixed with pleasure had your eyes rolling back, a piercing scream resonateed through your room. You wrap your arms around him, pulling him close; mouth meeting his again in a heated kiss. He pulled out before plunging himself into you again. You walls tightened around his length and you could feel yourself shivering as he hit all the right spots.

Moans, whimpers and skin slapping against each other are the only sounds filling the room. Satoru picked up the speed gradually as his hands intertwine with yours, pushing you back on the bed. "Fuck– star! You are– ahh incredible." He groans from the combined pleasure of just how good your pussy sucked him in. He could never defy, your body was the best one against his. He could never say any fuck with you was disappointing. He glided his hand under your thighs, pushing them against your chest in a mating press.

His cock hit your cervix as you are chanting his name like a mantra. Walls twitched around his shaft, you knew you were nearing your climax.

“Fuck- gonna cum soon.” Satoru could feel his cock prodding inside you. He rubbed circles on your clit, mouth latching on your neck, he nibbled on there.

The feel of his thumb on your clit and his cock hitting your cervix had you over the edge. You shuddered under him, milking his cock with your release. After a few thrusts, and a grunt he releases inside you – painting your walls white.

He hovered on top of you, shakily; trying to catch his breath just like you. A sheen of sweat glistened on both of your bodies as you stared right in his eyes. You know the look in his eyes. The affectionate and tender look which he always casts her. The look you wished was for you instead. It wasn't. It would never be.

He kisses you again. Instead of the heated kisses you shared until then, this was gentle. A soft, passionate kiss shared among two lovers.

The only problem? There are no lovers here.

You both are interrupted by the ring of Satoru’s phone. He clicks his tongue as he pushes himself off the bed and answers it. You can’t hear the conversation, just low grumbles and hushed whispers. You check the time from your phone but your eyes fall on your wallpaper.

A picture of you, Satoru, Suguru and Kazumi.

You found yourself wondering, what would happen if this Goddess of a woman were to find out that her husband has already broken his wedding vows?

What if she were to find out that her best friend wasn't a good friend she claimed her to be?

What if she were to find out that she can't have everything?

You glared at her picture, turning off your phone as your head falls back on your pillow. You don't have the time thinking about her and how this will affect her. Too far down the line to give two shits about her.

You can't have everything you want.

You snort, she was the first one to tell you that when you professed your passion for your dreams. And it wasn't once. It repeated time and time again. Everytime you brought up something you loved, you were shunned down by her.

Well then, now you are sleeping with her husband.

Did she want him? Yes. Did she want him for her and her alone? Yes. Can she have him? Yes. Can she have him as hers alone? No.

You did follow her advice though. To share, to adjust, to not want everything for yourself, to not be selfish. Time for her to follow the same advice too.

Adjust, settle, compromise. You can't have everything you want.

She was the first one to say that to you. Now you'd say it to her back if she ever finds out. Does that make you shallow? Spiteful even? A bad friend? Yes, it does.

But do you care? No.

This friendship had long been discarded by you. She might think of you still as her good little best friend but you didn't.

You let out a deep breath as you heard shifting beside you. The bed dipped down when Satoru slid in beside you, pressing a kiss on your forehead.

You hummed at the act of affection, languidly moving your eyes towards him, “You haven’t left yet?”

“Where should I go?”

“I don’t know…” You whispered. “Like to your wife? Its your first night with her.”

“I took care of that,” He replies nonchalantly. You don’t understand what he meant by that. Despite confusion engulfing you, you refrained from questioning further.

“Besides…” A sly smirk curves up his mouth as he pulled you closer by the waist, “I can’t leave now. I am not done with you.”

The same smirk slipped into your lips which met his and he returned the kiss with an equal fervour.

While this night was spend with intricacies of lust and spite in a room, a wife sat alone on her marriage bed awaiting her husband's arrival; unaware of how her fairytale was never one in the first place.

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