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#daddy issues but really it’s deeper than that
dolldefiler · 2 days
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Masterlist Part 2
Degradation/ Humiliation (predominantly) Part 1
Making a girl edge in front of a camera
Making a girl drink loads and not allowing her to pee
Training you to edge to my posts everyday, no matter where
Jiggle your tits for me, you fleshlight
I bully you and make you drink my piss & eat my ass
Using you as my under-desk cocksleeve
My thoughts on petplay
Degrading you and jerking off to your pics online
I'm going to make your daddy issues worse (rapey)
Two girls competing for my harem
You're the one that made your man worse
You're not supposed to think (misogyny)
The difference between a girl and a dog (misogyny)
Degrading a girl for pissing over my fingers
Training a girl like I'd train a dog
I'll push my cock in deeper for every question you get wrong (dumbification)
Stripping away a woman's identity
Boss turns secretary into his bitch
You disgusting little porn addict (misogyny)
Be a good gender traitor
Fucking you while I talk to your father on the phone (rimming)
Denying a girl and then overstimming her
Worship me, even when you're tired
Taking your anal virginity (ft. piss)
Listen to your mistress (W|W)
Hole inspection with a man old enough to be your dad
Ass fucking her in front of a camera
Exploiting a girl's praise kink with gold stars (ft. piss)
You were made to be my porn
If you can't type, your a dumb little bimbo
Corrupting you into being worse for me
It's okay to be my rapetoy (#UnicornSparkleSlut for more)
I know better than you (misogyny)
Edging yourself in a room full of other people
I write these posts for needy girls like you
You're just a pair of huge fucking tits, you cow
Of course you're a feminist
You're built for sex (mostly misogyny)
Cumming inside a virgin lesbian (dykebreaking)
Using a sex toy on you in public
Rub your wet boycunt
Fuck repenting when you can be mine
Be a good girl and squat for me
Secretary fucks his boss
Older women can be really fucking hot
You've never thought about anal before like this?
Degradation Part 2
You were born to be my slave
Teaching you to need my seed
Look at me with all that hate in your eyes
Stop moaning and start working
Watching a woman sink lower and lower
A lot of demands for someone who wants to be my slave
Lots of men would love to date a feminist. So would I.
You want to be degraded?
All sorts of girls message me
I'll train you with a clicker until you bark for me
I want a girl I can mutually obsess over
I love when a girl becomes something less
You're so inferior (cucky)
Being some vulnerable girl's therapist
Look at you edging away, phone in hand
Cheating/ Cuckquean
Responding to a cuck ask
Random incest/ cheating thought
I'll fuck you better than your boyfriend
Making you eat my ass in front of your friends
How you and I would turn her into a cuck
Fucking my daughter's ex-girlfriend (dykebreaking)
Cheating on her with you at dinner
Waking you up by jerking off to someone else (piss)
Cheating on you with a 'co-worker'
You encourage me to cuck you
Inviting her over for your birthday
Cheating with your boyfriend's best girl friend (W|W)
I'd convince you to let another woman into our bedroom
I want a blowjob from her friend
Fucking you in front of your boyfriend
I'll cheat on you because you're pathetic
Jerk me off while I look at her friend
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marcelsdavina · 2 years
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listening to family line by conan gray and trying to not make it about liam dunbar’s abandonment issues and trauma is an internal struggle.
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chxrryhansen · 3 months
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౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊ Cherry’s concepts 10/50
Character; Bucky Barnes
Kink; Piss Kink (i couldn’t help myself so i added pet play🙈)
Dialogue; “Look at the mess you made.”
Requested by; Anon (X)
As always, this blog contains 18+ content only, your media consumption is your own responsibility, all dark content will be labled as such. Please read at your own risk.
₊♡₊˚ 🍒・₊✧
your throat flared in distress as your lips began to chap and crack, having been wrapped around bucky's cock for the past 30 minutes, it was fair to say they weren't in the best of shape.
you were knelt between his thick thighs, the hard floor, harsh on your sensitive skin as he worked at his desk above you. bucky had made you drink many glasses of water, more than double your daily amount. when you couldn't drink all of the glasses he had graciously gifted you with, he punished you.
claiming you were being ungrateful, that daddy was just trying to take care of you. you had promised you'd be a good girl for him if it meant getting out of a spanking, your ass still sore from last weeks punishment- one that he'd manipulated you into (as usual).
you squirmed, desperate to find some relief as your mouth warmed buckys cock, your bladder beginning to feel more full as time went on. noticing your discomfort, he slumped back against his chair, pushing his long brown locks behind his ear with one hand, his bicep flexing as he did so.
you whimpered, your tongue massaging the underneath of his length making him hiss with surprise as he growled
"i thought you said you were a good girl for me? i think you lied, pup. cause' im pretty sure if you were a good girl, you'd be warming my cock with no complaints like daddy asked you too, hm?"
he was quick to grab a fistful of your hair, pushing you deeper onto his cock as your thighs pressed together, desperate to make him proud.. and not wanting to embarass yourself by peeing all over his floor.
you looked up at him, your eyes pleading, tears streaming down your cheeks.. begging for even an ounce of sympathy. bucky sighed as he pulled you away from his cock, you were instantly opening and closing your mouth, swinging your jaw in circles as you tried to loosen up your locked jaw.
"go on, what's the problem with you now, puppy? what are those pretty tears for?"
"i really gotta' go daddy." you whispered, ashamed, your cheeks flustered in embarassment.
"go where, puppy?" he asked in return, a slight smirk on his face as he stroked your head gently, already knowing what the issue was.
"the bathroom, p-please daddy?"
"yeah? you gotta' go pee, sweetheart? you sure you can't hold it just a little longer for daddy?"
you shook your head desperately, your bladder already felt like it was about to burst, all of that water bucky had pressured you into drinking finally catching up to you, making you tense up in fear of leaking.
he sighed once more as he tutted in false disappointment "well alright then, go on puppy, go pee."
"oh thankyou, daddy! thankyou so much, i promise it won't happen again!" you gasped excitedly, seeming as your owner had been feeling generous... or so you thought.
you began to push of your knees in an attempt to stand when you felt bucky harshly pull you back down, this time sitting you on his thick thighs, straddling him. you looked up at him in alarm, eyes wide, wondering what you had done wrong.
your bladder suddenly feeling even heavier than before as you tried to prevent yourself from pissing out of fear, your thighs clenching tightly together. which didn’t go unnoticed by bucky as he spread your legs apart with both hands.
"where do you think your going?" he scolded.
"t-the bathroom.. y-you said i could go, daddy?"
"silly girl, puppy's don't use bathrooms now do they?"
you cocked your head, puzzled "i-i don't understand."
"of course you don't, dumb little girl, puppy's don't use the bathroom, if you need to pee so badly then do it, right here on daddys lap." he growled, his intense gaze sending shivers down your spine.
he reaches down, pressing his hand against your tummy, pushing down against your bladder as tears of humiliation roll down your flustered cheeks.
“d-daddy, i can’t hold it, i really gotta’ pee.”you squirm desperately, your pussy throbbing with pain, or maybe, pleasure?
"stupid puppy, you gonna' piss yourself, hm? gonna' piss all over daddys lap? shh, sweetheart. let go for me, let go for daddy."
you let out a loud sob as the ache between your thighs is suddenly relieved, before you can even understand what's happening a heavy flow of liquid gushes out of your pussy, soaking through buckys lap and onto his extremely hard cock- which he had apparently just taken out of his pants.
he groans in pleasure "oh baby.. fuck, that's it, you were just so full, huh? so desperate you just had to piss all over daddys dick, what a filthy little puppy, look at the fuckin' mess you made."
he smirks, thrusting his hips into your own, grinding his cock into your soaked pussy making you sob harder in confusion. your brain having not caught up to what just happened.
bucky is quick to pull up your skirt and push your panties to the side, sliding his thick cock inbetween your thighs and rubbing his swollen tip against your entrance.
he swiftly pulls you down by your hips, his mushroom head only just pushing past your walls making you let out a pathetic moan…before a smooth warmth begins to fill your cunt. at first your confused, knowing bucky never cums that quickly, until you look down and see a steady stream of piss leaking out of you.
“fuck… my dirty fuckin’ piss slut, letting her daddy piss inside her silly, baby cunt. you like that? you like being a disgusting, hot, mess for your daddy? filthy little pup.”
you sob into his shoulder, humiliated yet so turned on as his hot piss floods your pussy, running down your legs and dripping onto the floor.
bucky shushes you as he codles your head, rubbing his hands gently up and down your back, his stream still filling you with his warmth, trying desperately to keep his moans and whimpers to a minimum, so as not to let you know how much he's enjoying himself. your silly, puppy brain is too dumb and confused to notice anyway.
"shh, shh, it's okay puppy, daddy had an accident too, see? no need to cry about it, silly girl.” he consoles you, pushing your head back down into his shoulder when you try to move, not wanting you to notice the shit eating grin plastered across his face.
he has you right where he wants you, dumbed out and dependant on him to make you feel better... just like he always does... and just like you always are.
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strawberrysturniolo · 4 months
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someone older pt 2 // chris sturniolo
summary: after chris and his new photographer have a successful first shoot, they struggle with the idea of them being able to have a professional relationship. teasing, degrading, spanking, rough sex, age gap, daddy kink, secret relationship.
part one
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The long awaited Fresh Love drop was a success. So much so that Chris called me, thanking me profusely for my addition to the project. He went on to say that he “hopes we can work together again,” but part of me knows there’s something more to it. 
The last time he was here, we made out and took a variety of photos during the act. 
He wound up getting a phone call from his manager, putting a hold in our activities. 
I’m not sure where that would have led us, had she not called and he had to leave. I don’t think it would have gone further. I don’t know if I would have allowed it.
It was fun in the moment, and I certainly don’t regret it. The only issue is that now with me staring at a new message from Chris about a future shoot, I have to make sure that we’re in agreement of this being simply work, not pleasure in any way.
Chris
Thanks again for the last session. I got amazing feedback from everyone. I wanted to send a message and ask you if you had time this week to do another shoot? That was kind of a test run of what pieces people might like, but now that we have more colors I need to get some more shots in them. Lmk when you’re free 
Me
Call me.
I set my phone down on my kitchen counter, trying to let the memories of him sucking my jaw flee my brain. He paid really well, but he was really great to work with, so if kissing him a little while I have fun working with him helps… then what’s the harm?
No, there’s so much harm in this. 
My phone rings almost immediately after the message is sent. I hesitate answering, but realize how bad it would look if I didn’t pick up the phone after I just sent a message asking for him to call.
“Hey,” I greet him casually.
“Hey. I assume this is to follow up my message?” he asks. 
I find myself pacing around my kitchen, trying to find the right words. “Yeah, but Chris–”
“But?” he cuts in. “There’s but’s now?”
I pause. “What’s wrong with there being a but?”
“This isn’t a work type but,” he goes on. “This is a ‘there’s an issue between you and me’ type but.”
I don’t respond. 
“Is there?” he asks, noticing my silence. 
“No. Maybe? I don’t know Chris. What I do know is that I did enjoy working with you and I’m glad the drop was what you hoped for–”
“More than what I hoped for,” he interrupts me again. “That happened because of you.”
“Maybe that’s true but if you want to keep working with me then what happened last time can’t happen again,” I say confidently, really trying to convince myself of the same. 
I can picture him searching for the words to say. He settles on, “Why?”
I wish I had a better answer. “Part of it just feels wrong.”
“What about it feels wrong? I kissed you. You kissed me back. We did that together. We talked about it afterwards. We said it was good and we were glad it happened.”
“I know,” I nod to myself. I got myself in too deep. “I’m five years older than you, and this is a workplace relationship. This shouldn’t have happened. It’s highly unprofessional and it makes me look bad as an artist.”
“This relationship is also two sided,” he refutes again. “Why do you get to make the calls and decide what’s right and wrong if I was involved in it too?”
Okay… This guy might be more mature than I was led to believe. 
“I mean,” he continues. “I could get in trouble too, you know? If my manager found out I was kissing all over my new photographer, I’d be toast. She’d insist on me finding someone else no matter how successful our shoots are. So if you don’t want to shoot with me anymore then fine, but if it’s because you can’t handle a little tension here and there then there’s something deeper that you need to resolve on your own.”
Part of that cuts deep until I’m suddenly stitched back up and determined to prove a point to him. Maybe this Chris Sturniolo is a fling kind of guy. Maybe he has the power over his own feelings to be able to disguise when he’s into someone, but I’m not able to do the same. It’s written on my face, and the last thing I need is for this guy five years younger than me to win this argument. 
So game on. 
“Come over tonight. Bring your gear and I’ll start setting up now.”
His voice is laced with a cocky tone. I can picture the smirk on his face. “I thought you’d say that.”
The rest of the day passes as I set up my studio with backdrops I spray painted a few days ago. This time, decorated with dark blue splatter designs and graffiti. In a daze and my mind wrapped around all things Chris, I graffitied the words ‘Fresh Love,’ which he went on to compliment upon arrival.
“I’m glad you came around,” he added. “They liked the shots of us together, and I didn’t want to have to search for another model for it if you were right here.”
I nod, trying to have my best poker face as if my eyes aren’t following his every move. “Stand on the X.”
He goes to his place with a smile, knowing my routine now. “Ah, test shots, huh? You do these every time?”
“Wouldn’t miss them,” I respond shortly.
He must have noticed that I’m trying to keep this as business as possible, seeing how he started making every fucking face he could to somehow turn me on. The most seductive smirks, hands in his hair, pulling his shirt a certain way so some of his skin would show more on his stomach.
I hate him.
I need more. 
“The lighting is good,” I say as I stand up straight, setting the camera to its flush settings. “Do what feels natural, just like last time.”
He smiles. “If I wanted things to be like last time then you’d be in front of the camera with me.”
I suck in a deep breath. “If you behave then maybe I’ll join you.”
That shuts him up as he starts posing for me. Eventually he asks, “Can I take this sweatshirt off now? Or are we still looking for a good shot?”
I shake my head. “I think we got it. We can do some without now.”
He peels his sweatshirt off, letting it stay stuck to his shirt he wears below it, allowing it to peel up in unison and reveal his stomach and chest. The minimal but dark hairs that decorate his lower stomach give me far too much to imagine as I stare at him. I want to see more of him, and I want those clothes gone. I’m aching for him, and he’s using it to his advantage.
“You taking pictures of my clothes or my body, baby?”
I snap out of it, brought back to him at the sound of the pet name. 
The name ‘baby’ leaving his lips almost has me buckling at the knees. 
He pulls his bottom lip between his lips, then glances between me and his own shirt. He peels his shirt off, standing bare from the waist up in front of me, dressed now in only his gray sweatpants representing his brand. Even those hang lower and give me too much to think about. 
“Put this on and stand in front of the camera,” he instructs, tossing me the shirt as he switches positions with me. “Don’t worry… I’ll turn around while you change.”
For some stupid reason I find myself listening to him. I swap my shirt for his brand, standing on the center point of the camera and allowing him to get comfortable behind it. 
He looks through the viewfinder at me, studying the shot before he snaps the moment. “Beautiful,” he mumbles, standing up straight again and smiling. He cocks his head to the side. “Now lose the pants.” 
“Chris…” I start to say, but he has more.
“It’s just me and you,” he assures me. “Plus, this is your camera. I have no access to this. If you really don’t want to then fine, but I promise, no one will see these besides me.”
His eyes stare into mine with a determination that says, ‘You know you want it.’
And I fucking do.
Maintaining eye contact, I unbutton my jeans and pull them off my legs slowly, tossing them to the side and standing in front of him in his own shirt and a pair of dark red panties, a thong that hugs my hips in the right way and makes my ass look like his new favorite thing. 
He licks his lips, swallowing as he steps back in front of the camera, trying to bite his tongue to keep from making a certain sound or saying something foul.
I want to know what’s going on in that head of his, but I refuse to ask and act interested even if I am. 
I start to take control, letting myself feel more comfortable standing in front of him half naked. I start lifting the shirt little by little as he takes more photos, the click satisfying me even more when my back is to him, my ass on full display.
“Fuck,” he sighs. “That’s it.”
My stomach is turning in the best way at every compliment, every look, every sound that leaves his mouth. He isn’t doing his best at hiding his physical reaction either, seeing that his dick is now pressed to the sweatpants around his waist. 
“You okay back there?” I tease, now smiling.
“Shut up,” he warns.
I let my body relax. “Business professional, remember?” 
He scoffs. “Yeah, fuck that.”
I give him a glaring look. “Chris.”
“Don’t say my name.” My stomach almost falls until he continues. “Not when you look like that and I’m trying to keep it in my pants. Do not say my name.”
My smile grows as I step closer. “So you don’t want me, Chris?”
His eyes fall shut.
“You’re saying you don’t need me, Chris?”
He takes a deep breath, lets it out, and grits out, “Fuck. This.”
He pulls me aside from the camera, his lips finding mine as I take my hands to his hair, finishing where we left off. A soft moan leaves my lips as his dick presses against my thigh. 
“Yeah,” he nods. “You did want me.”
I nod desperately back at him. “Really bad.”
“Mmmm,” he hums, kissing my neck. “You can have me right now, you know?” 
I have a mental battle with myself while I’m in his arms, and then without thinking clearly I’m pulling him to my bedroom despite the voice in my head shouting for me to leave this alone. 
I need relief, and he is exactly the painkiller I want. 
He follows me blindly, refusing to detach his hands from my skin. I can’t get enough of him. He’s grabbing my ass, feeling my everywhere, teasing his leg in between mine. His thigh presses against my core, earning a gasp from me as I sit on the edge of the bed.
“Poor baby,” he pouts, pushing me back onto the mattress. 
I lift my arms for him, giving him access to the underside of my shirt, lifting it off with ease. My hands find the desperation he is trying to satisfy, a pleased groan leaving his throat at my touch. 
“Looks like someone was struggling too, huh?” I notice. My hand makes soft movements over his length, stopping when his hand juts out and grabs it. 
He lowers his gaze to meet mine, our faces now level as I sit on the bed and he kneels in front of it. 
“I’ve fantasized about you touching me and sucking me off, but I haven’t gotten a clear idea of what you look like with your ass up, or what your pussy feels like around me. So you wanna show me what it’s like?” 
I’m ready to do anything he wants no matter how eager it makes me look. 
Yet I can’t find the words that convey this. 
I nod again. His hand grips my jaw as he pushes his mouth back to mine, shoving my body back onto the mattress in the process. He pins me down, grinding his hips into mine and teasing me with his cock before huffing out a breath and flipping me over. He lifts me by my hips, keeping my ass in the air for him. 
“You gonna be able to take me with no foreplay? Nothing but my dick fucking you senseless, baby?” he whispers, pushing my shirt up – his shirt – and kissing down my back in between words. 
“Yes, Chris,” I give in.
He tsks. “Don’t say my name. You know what you want to say. It’s on the tip of your tongue.”
Is he serious?
Because if he is… fuck this business relationship. I’ll need him in my bed every night. 
I must have taken too long to respond. His palm smacks against my ass, demanding a response. 
I wince. “Yes, daddy.”
“Good girl,” he says softly as he rubs his fingers where I was just spanked, soothing the pain. 
He kisses over the spot as he pulls my thong to the side. He then dips his head between my legs from behind, licking a harsh stripe on my folds. He hums in pleasure. 
“Fuck, you taste so good.” His finger rubs over that same spot. “Gonna have to taste you after I fill you up and see how good we taste together.”
Without realizing, I back my ass up to him, so much so that he smacks my ass again. 
“Needy girls get nothing,” he warns, and I find myself apologizing profusely. 
There is no way this kid five years younger than me is having this much control. There’s no way I put myself in this position. 
The tip of his dick teases at my slit, swiping it a few times before pushing in and pulling right back out. “So tight.” He does the same motion a few more times before shoving in completely, moaning loudly as he lays his chest on my back, tucking his head in my neck. His lips suck on the spot that has me gripping my sheets as he fills me up. His hips start thrusting into me, his hips railing into my ass as he fucks me mercilessly. The sound is the hottest thing I’ve ever heard. Me dripping wet while he fucks himself deeper. His skin slapping against mine while my bed shakes, trying to hold us.
“Taking it so good baby,” he mumbles in my ear. He slaps my ass again, keeping his mouth close to my ear so he can talk me through it. “You like it rough, huh? Don’t you, you fucking slut?”
I whine at the name. “Uh huh.”
His fingers dig into my sides as he drills himself as deep as he can. 
“FUCK– Yes, daddy,” I correct myself. “I’m sorry.”
“You’re so bad, baby,” he shakes his head in my neck. “Bratty as hell.”
I lower myself to my elbows, now unable to keep myself propped up the way he wanted me originally. He brings himself back up to his knees, fucking me at this new position. He speeds up, smacking my ass every so often, enough to where I can feel heat radiating off of it from the friction of his hand on my skin. 
He continues to mock and degrade me, talking me through everything before his hips start thrusting erratically.
My hand reaches behind me, clinging to his wrist as I look at him over my shoulder. The nerves building inside of me are struggling to hold on. I feel like I’m going to break. “Daddy, I’m-”
His eyes go wide as my mouth drops. Watching my face as I cum, Chris’ hips still, his dick deep inside of me as my pussy grips him. His lips part, eliciting a loud whine. I cum around him, and it’s only a moment later that I can feel him filling me up.
I lower my face to a pillow, trying to regain my breath and any strength left in me. Chris pulls out after a few seconds, fulfilling his promise and cleaning up our mess between my legs. I let out a few weak moans, too wiped to make much noise. 
He lays next to me, sweat on his forehead causing a few hairs by his ears to stick out straight, losing the natural curl in them and replacing them with a spiky style. 
“So,” he says, his breath lost. “Business professional from now on?” 
tag list: @freshloveforthefit @lacysturniolo @mattitties @floofparker @javalakers @creamoncreamoncream2 @heebiejeebiezz @sturnswrites @runupthathillgirl @gdsvhtwa @666hellokitty420 @runupthathillgirl @oliviasturniolo21 @keira324 @sstvrnioloo @sturnitup @sturnsvoid @theyluv-meee @therewilljustbereputationts13 @ilovedasturniolos @dancemomsfanee @rootbeerworshiper @sturn3ol0 @swaggygirlboss123 @lustfulslxt
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leclercss · 11 months
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Tainted Love, Part 1 (Charles Leclerc)
Masterlist
plot: in an attempt to fix your marriage, you've reluctantly agreed into being in an open relationship with your husband. so far, it's only been your husband that has taken advantage of your recent arrangement until one night out you meet a man who makes you begin to question your marriage.
pairings: charles leclerc x fem!reader
warnings: (+18) mentions of smut, cheating and some swearing
authors note: this is based on a story that i was writing in my spare time but thought it would be interesting to use Charles and a couple of other drivers as characters instead. so Charles is used as a character inspo rather than it including his life as an f1 driver. would love to hear your thoughts and if you'd be open for a part 2. i'm thinking of making this a longer fic.
word count: 4.8k
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"[Y/N!]”
You don't really hear your name being called at first. You've been stuck in your own thoughts for the last five minutes, staring at nothing in particular.
"[Y/N]!" It's a little louder this time but still not enough to knock you out of the deep trance you've found yourself in. It's only when you get an elbow into your side and the champagne that's in your hand falls onto your lap that you finally snap out of it.
"Shit!' you squeal as you look down at the champagne that now soaks the bottom of your dress.
"Oh my God! I'm so sorry," the girl beside you laughs, "We've been trying to your attention for the last minute."
You look up at her, eyebrows furrowed. You can't remember her name. Was it Bethany? Stephanie? You didn't care, to be honest. It didn't really matter anyway; she wasn't your friend. You were only here as you were roped into pre-drinks before a girls' night out by your best friend, who was the only person you know here.
"It's fine, I was totally out of it," you mumble as you reach out for a napkin to dry the bottom of your dress.
"No shit," you hear a familiar voice say with a hint of smugness. You look across the table and see your best friend Whitney holding back a smirk. "You're on your fourth glass of champagne. I'd be out of it too if I was drinking as quickly as you've been".
You chuckle half-heartedly. Laughing it off as if it was the bottle of Moet that you mostly managed to get through on your own which caused you to be zoned out for so long. Not the fact that you’ve been replaying the arguments that you’ve been having with your husband over the last few weeks in your head. Nor the fact that you’ve been thinking about your shambles of a marriage.
As Whitney takes her attention off you to start cleaning up the mess, you let out a little sigh to yourself and go back to your previous thoughts.
How had your marriage gotten to this point?
You had been so in love with your husband when you first met. In fact, he’d been the only person you had ever been in love with. There was a ten-year age gap between the two of you but that hadn’t stopped you both falling for each other so quickly. He was one of the first people you had gotten to know when you first moved to London six years ago. You’d met on a night out about three months after moving to the city. The physical attraction was instant but that blossomed into something much deeper and within two years you had gotten married. He was your rock, your entire world. And maybe that was a bit of a risk for a girl, who at that point was in her early twenties, to depend on somebody so much and so quickly.
You had a few sceptics when it came to your relationship back in the early days. A few friends from back home had told you it was just a whirlwind romance with a hot older guy. Your mother had been unsure about the age gap. What would a girl in her early twenties need from a man in his early thirties? And what would a man in his early thirties need from a woman in her early twenties?
Your brother had joked that it was probably daddy issues.
You married him anyway. And the first two years of marriage had been bliss. Until about eighteen months ago when things had started to change.  Your husband spent more time away from home (he said it was work related), the sex had become less regular (not by a lack of trying on your part) and you slowly started to feel like a spare part in your marriage.
You started to have a feeling that someone else was now involved in your marriage. And that feeling was unofficially confirmed to you when your husband had brought up the possibility of having an open relationship - basically, he could fuck whoever he wanted, and you couldn’t (and wouldn’t) complain about it. You reluctantly agreed. You loved your husband, and you were willing to make this sacrifice if it means that you could start to repair your marriage. But you were so wrong.
Deep down you knew that you were never going to leave him. And your husband knew that too. Six months into your “open relationship” and your husband had been taking full advantage of the arrangement. Meanwhile, you took the opposite approach and hadn’t slept with anyone outside of your marriage. Despite that, your jealousy grew towards your husbands’ new partners and your loyalty was wearing thin. You had initially been quiet about your doubts when it came to your arrangement. But lately you had been more vocal to your husband about your feelings. Of course, he dismissed those feelings. That’s why you were arguing lately. He had told you that it was something you both needed in your marriage, you guys were too dependent on one other. You told him that you should be enough for him, you didn’t need other people to fill whatever void he was feeling. But you were beginning to realise that maybe you weren’t enough for him.
“Oi! Snap out of it. I’ve poured you another glass. But you better drink it quickly. And fix your dress because the Uber is getting here in ten minutes,” Whitney scolds as she shoves the champagne glass back into your hand.
“Thanks, Whit.” You can’t help but smile at her. Apart from your husband, Whitney had been your only other source of love and stability during your years in London. And that was why she had dragged you out tonight to pull you out of your recent misery.
“You know what you need? A girl’s night out! And before you roll your eyes and tell me how you’re officially too old for clubbing, we’re going out. You need to spend time with someone else other than him. And it’s been so long since you’ve been shitfaced,” is what Whitney had said when you had told her that you and your husband had been arguing more and more these days. You still hadn’t told her about the open marriage thing. She’d never forgive you for agreeing to it.
You flash her a smile before downing your last glass of champagne. Despite your hesitation, maybe a girls’ night out was what you needed.
-
“To getting shitfaced!” you yell before throwing the hard liquor down your throat. You try not to gag as you slam the empty shot glass down on the bar. Despite your previous doubts of this girl’s night out, you had been having a good time. It wasn’t your usual scene, but you had made an effort to join in and found yourself in a tipsy but playful mood.
“Come on, Stephanie has found a group of hot guys who’ve got a table,” Whitney shouts in your ear. You look at her and giggle, “Seriously?”
“Seriously! Now come on, I think they’re French.”
You allow yourself to be dragged over to the table where the other girls were mingling and flirting with a group of guys. You take a quick glance; they look about two or three years younger than you. Not your type (there was no harm in looking) but they were definitely good-looking.
“This is my friend Whitney, she’s single by the way. And this is her friend, [Y/N},” you hear Stephanie tell them. “But she’s married”.
One of the guys looks at you and lets out a laugh, “What a shame. Lucky guy”. You try to fake a smile at his remark, but your mind momentarily flashes back to your husband.
Rather than trying to come up with a response, you look around the table for something to drink. “Who’s up for some shots?” you ask before grabbing whatever alcohol you can find on the table. God, the hangover is going to be deadly tomorrow.
Just as you’re about to pour yourself something, you feel someone lean over to place a tray of Jager bombs on the table in front of you. “Did someone say shots?” he shouts before being met with a round of cheers. Before you have a chance to look up, the guy has sat down beside you. He leans over and whispers in your ear, “Weren’t you just doing tequila at the bar?” His breath is hot in your ear, his accent even hotter.
“Didn’t know there was a limit to how many shots a girl could have,” you tease, your playful mood apparent.
As you turn to face him, you’re met with a pair of piercing green eyes staring back at you. Fuck, they’re gorgeous. He’s said something to you but you’re too busy staring into his eyes that’s you have no idea what he’s said to you. “Huh?”
You only break eye contact with him as you notice his eyes start to scan your face, most notably he’s looking at your lips before lowering his eyes towards your cleavage. His eyes stay there for a moment before he’s looking into your eyes again. A knot begins to tie in your stomach.
You feel yourself starting to blush at the intense eye contact when you see his mouth start to move again. You really have no clue what he’s said this time.
“I’m sorry, what?”
He chuckles. He quickly scans your face again, smirk still intact, before leaning over to your ear once more. “I said, there’s no limit as long as it doesn’t stop me dancing with you later.”
As he leans back, you can’t help but admire his face. He has a light amount of facial hair, making his somewhat boyish face slightly more mature and handsome. You notice his dimples as he continues to smirk at you before taking a not-so-subtle glance at his lips. As you look back up at his eyes, you realised your staring is painfully obvious.
He leans over you and grabs two glasses from the tray of shots, handing you one. His eyes are back on yours again as he clinks his glass against yours, “Cheers!” You down the shot, wincing in the process before slamming the glass back on the table. “That was disgusting,” you groan before letting out a giggle.
You look back at the Frenchman who’s smiling at you. “Now I’ve gotten you a drink, are you going to tell me your name?” he asks. As he does so, he leans in slightly, so his face is a little closer to yours.
“It’s [Y/N],” you reply. “And yours?”
But before he has a chance to respond, the guy sitting behind your drinking companion leans over and chuckles, “Leave the girl alone, Charles. She’s married,” before turning back to his previous conversation. The beautiful man in front of you, who you’re assuming is Charles, looks back at you. “Married, huh?” He doesn’t look phased.
You nod. “And he’s not with you tonight?”
“No, it’s girls’ night. No husbands or boyfriends allowed,” you reply.
“And what other rules do you have on these girls’ nights?”
“Get as drunk as humanly possible with a group of hot guys.”
-
You’ve spent quite a while talking to Charles. He’s still flirting with you, lightly pushing the boundaries of “I know you’re married”. You’ve learned he’s from Monaco, not France. And he’s been living in London for about a year with a group of his friends from back home. He’s single (you’re not entirely sure how when he looks like that) and he’s better at handling his alcohol than you are.
You’ve spent a short amount of time getting to know some of his friends. His best friend Joris has been getting cosy with Whitney. You didn’t even get a chance to learn one guy’s name before he had started making out with Stephanie. The others you’re too drunk to remember they’re even here. However, your attention always falls back on Charles. And his attention always falls back on you.
You hadn’t even spared a thought about your husband until you saw your phone light up. First you notice your phone background, a picture of you and your husband kissing in front of the Eiffel Tower (and you’re aware that Charles is looking at your phone too). Then his name pops up on your screen. You glance at the message through your alcohol-blurred vision. It says something along the lines of how your night was going and if you were coming back home tonight. You roll eyes before swiping away the message.
“Husband?” Charles asks you. His finger has been tracing your knee for the last few minutes. You nod, trying to push the face of your husband to the back of your mind.
“Yeah, nothing important.”
Charles smiles at you. “How long have you two been married?”
“Four years, together for six.”
“Six years, you must have been late teens when you got together right?” you think it’s his attempt of saying you look good for your late twenties (as if that’s old). But it works on you momentarily, or it’s the fact that the finger tracing your leg has now turned into a hand.
“Well, I was twenty-one. He’s ten years older,” you tell him.
“And how’s that going? Is he okay with these girls’ nights out?”
You’re not sure why he’s quizzing you. It’s probably because of the face you pulled when you saw your husband’s name pop up on your screen. Or the fact that you haven’t mentioned him once all night. Most girls Charles has come across quickly name-drop their partner into conversations quite quickly if they aren’t interested but not you. Your body language has changed since the mention of your husband. And you’ve only been giving short answers when being questioned about him which tells Charles that your husband may be the reason you’re here tonight.
“He has his nights out, I have mine,” you lie before having a quick look around the table. “I’m not here to talk about married life.”
You momentarily look back to Charles who seems a bit taken back by your bluntness before looking back across at Whitney who’s no longer being occupied by Joris. “Whitney, can we go dancing?”
“Let’s do it!”
You stand up from your seat and look down at Charles. “I’m going to go dance. Whenever you want to do another shot come grab me,” you tell him before Whitney takes your arm and leads you to the dance floor. You feel a bit rude for ending your conversation with Charles so abruptly. But you weren’t here to spend the night talking about a man you’re trying to avoid.
-
Swaying your hips to the music and dancing with your best friend was exactly what you needed. The alcohol was well and truly coursing through your body at this point and it gave you the confidence you needed to feel sexy on the dancefloor. You weren’t a bad dancer by any means, but the numerous shots and glasses of champagne were a big help.
Whitney had reunited with Joris on the dancefloor, grinding and making out with one another. You didn’t mind dancing on your own. You were lost in the rhythm of the music, attracting some bystanders who you subtly moved away from when they got too close.
That was until you felt someone place their arm around your waist from behind. The hand felt familiar, but you couldn’t quite place it until you felt a mouth press against your ear. “You were looking a little lonely, thought I’d come and join you.”
You could get used to that voice whispering in your ear.
You look up at him and smile, “How thoughtful of you, Charles.” You were a little too drunk to care about the fact that his other hand found itself around your waist, pulling your body towards gently towards him. Mostly because you were enjoying it.
You felt his torso press against your back, and you leaned against his body as his hips joined yours in swaying to the music. As the both of you found your rhythm, you pressed your ass against his crotch and grinded a little harder on him. Truly letting yourself get lost in the moment with him. You think you hear Whitney cheer at the sight in front of her, but your only focus is on your movements against Charles. You feel one of his hands slide from your waist towards your ass, squeezing it a little before running it back up your waist to just below your breasts.
Fuck, that felt good.
You lean the back of your head against Charles’ chest and peer up at him through your lashes. He’s looking down at you and slowly moves his face towards yours, hips still moving in synchronisation. You look into his eyes, his attention fully on you before you take a quick glance at his lips. They’re slightly parted and if you didn’t have a slight nagging voice in the back of your head you totally would have kissed him. You’re suddenly nervous, you haven’t felt like this with a guy since you first met your husband. It’s new territory but it excites you. Is this why your husband wanted an open relationship? For the thrill and excitement of being so close and almost intimate with someone that wasn’t you?
Charles notices that you’ve gotten lost in your thoughts but wants your attention back on him. He lifts your chin with his thumb, so your face is closer to his and mimics your actions from a few moments ago – looking into your eyes before looking at your lips. You can feel his breath hitting your face and so you lick your lips. If he wants to kiss you, he’s going to have to make the first move.
He senses this and leans in; your parted lips meet his. You’re not sure if it’s nerves but it’s almost like you’ve forgotten how to kiss. The feeling of Charles’ lips against yours has caused all thoughts and logic to leave your body. You’re thankful that he takes the initiative once again and starts to move his lips against yours. You find your momentum again as your place one of your arms behind your head and place your hands on Charles’ cheek, your back still firmly pressed against his torso. As you continue to kiss, you notice that his crotch is still placed firmly against your ass, the bulge in his pants is slightly harder this time and it causes you to feel a slight tingle in your underwear.
As your kiss becomes more passionate, Charles turns you around so you’re face to face. He cups your cheeks with one of his hands, his thumb firmly under your chin and he reconnects your lips together. This time he slips his tongue into your mouth, and it begins to move against yours. The tingly sensation in your underwear is back again and it causes you to moan against Charles mouth. You can feel him smile against your lips, but it doesn’t stop him, it only encourages him to deepen this kiss even further. It’s like you’re the only two people in the room. Your body is tightly pressed against his, slowly tracing his chest with your fingers while Charles’ hands are covering as much body surface as possible. The hand that was cupping your cheek is now on your breast, his thumb grazing over the area where your nipple is. You’re not wearing a bra, so your nipple hardens at his touch, causing him to smile into your kiss once again. His other hand is very low on your back, his fingers spread across the top of your bum.
You’re not sure how long you’ve been kissing for, it could be thirty seconds or thirty minutes but you don’t want to stop. One of your hands finds its way into his silky brown hair and you tug on it lightly. In retaliation, he squeezes one your bum cheeks. This time you’re the one smiling against his lips.
After what feels like an eternity, you both part from the kiss. Your eyes meet his and it feels like you’re in a trance with him. All you can do is just look at him, only him. You’re not sure how long you’ve been standing like this, your hands on his chests, his on your waist. Once again, it’s Charles that takes the initiative but this time in conversation.
He leans down to your ear, your body lightly pressed against his. “Do you want to come back with me tonight?” He leans his head back slightly to gage your reaction. You quickly lick your lips. Your body is telling you to say yes – the tingle in your underwear is only getting bigger. But your head is pounding and you’re not able to open your mouth. The only thing you can do is move and so you move one of your hands from his chest up to Charles’ cheek, your thumb slow soothing the soft skin beneath you.
He's still waiting for an answer. His green eyes staring into yours.
As you finally muster up the courage to speak you feel you feel a strange hand placed on your shoulder. You jump slightly at the sudden touch of contact which clearly isn’t from Charles and turn your head into the direction it came from. Stephanie, the queen of impeccable timing, is smiling at you. She’s saying something to you but you’re not really paying attention.
Only until she starts waving your phone in front of your face do you realise what she’s saying. You thank her before taking your phone and looking at the screen.
It’s your husband. Out of all the nights he could have given you attention, it had to be tonight. You quickly look at your phone and see a missed call accompanied by three or four more unread texts. From a quick glance, you see he’s a bit concerned that you hadn’t responded to his previous message telling him what time you’d been home. He’d never usually ask so it’s a bit baffling to you why he’d suddenly care now. Then again, it’s the first “girls’ night” you’d gone out to in about two years. And you remembered the arguments you guys had been having for the past few weeks and the way you stormed out of the flat this morning.
And what you didn’t realise is that he had seen you pack one of your more revealing dresses in anger when you told him you were going out with Whitney and a few of her girlfriends tonight.
He was worried. Not about you. But about what you might be doing.
“Is everything okay?” Charles voice brings you back to reality and you look up at him for the first time since Stephanie had given you your phone. You hope he hasn’t seen you gulp but he has. He notices a flicker of hesitation in your eyes.
You nod and smile at him, but he’s not convinced. Your husband’s messages have brought you back to reality and your body language has become closed off. You’re no longer touching Charles. He removes his hands from your waist and you’re both left standing there awkwardly on the dancefloor.
You open your mouth to say something but at first nothing comes out. You let out a deep breath before you finally allow yourself to speak, “I can’t. I’m… I’m married, Charles.” He breaks eye contact with you and place his hands into his jean pockets. He’s nodding but doesn’t really say anything.
You both stand there awkwardly for a few moments before you speak again, “I think I need to go. I’m sorry, Charles”. You lean up to place a soft kiss on his cheek. His posture softens a little bit, but he’s disappointed.
“Don’t worry about it,” he says. It sounds a little deflated and you can’t help but feel guilty. Moments before Stephanie had handed you your phone, you would have easily said yes to anything Charles would have asked you but now you find yourself in a weird mindset. You’re curious and you want to know what going home with him feels like, but your husbands’ messages are now imprinted in your brain. And so, you take the easier option which is to go home to your husband and be the loyal wife you’ve talked yourself into being for the last eighteen months.
“Have a good night, Charles,” you say softly before flashing a sympathetic smile. You turn away to leave the dancefloor when you feel Charles’ hand wrap around your arm. He tugs you back towards him and grabs your phone out of your hand. He gestures for you to put in your pin, and you oblige. He takes your phone once again and taps away on the keyboard before handing your phone back to you. You look at your screen to see he’s put his number into your phone.
“For whenever you need another “girls’ night”,” he whispers into your ear before letting you leave.
You quickly search for Whitney to let her know that you’re leaving before ordering an Uber home. As you hug Whitney goodbye, she leans in and whispers, “I hope you had fun tonight. I won’t say anything”. And you know she’s referring to the kiss that you’ve shared with Charles not so long ago. You thank her before making your way out of the club and getting into the Uber which arrives a few minutes later.
-
You rest your head against the window as you the Uber takes you through the busy London streets. You can’t help but feel disappointed with how your night ended and your mind flashes back to the look on Charles’ face when you told him you were leaving. A part of you wishing you had stayed.
You let out a little sigh and shut your eyes, pushing the image of Charles and the feeling of his lips against yours to the back of your head before opening your eyes again. Your phone lights up, catching your attention and you see a text from Whitney asking if you had made it home yet. You scroll down a little further on your notifications to see the unread text messages and missed calls from your husband.
You unlock your phone and start to type up your replies.
The first text.
Whitney: Just in the Uber now, be home in 20 x
The second text.
Lewis ♥: Staying at Whitney’s tonight. I’ll be home before noon tomorrow. Love you xx
You close your conversation with your husband and click on the + icon to open a new message. You let out another sigh before you begin typing the message.
To Charles: Hey, it’s [Y/N]. We didn’t get to finish our dance, mind if I come to yours? X
Your thumb hovers over the send button. You’ve typed your message, now all you have to do is send the it. Shit! You’re such a coward. You tell yourself that if you count to five you’ll send the message. Okay…
5…
4…
3…
2…
1…
Sent.
You quickly lock your phone out of embarrassment and throw it onto the seat beside you. Shit, why did you just do that? You refuse to look at your phone and tell yourself it was a dumb idea to message Charles. You just need to get home, get to bed and pretend like it never happened.
It’s about fifteen or so minutes later and you’re only a few streets away from your apartment. You’ve told yourself not to look at your phone but at the same time you’re curious to see if Charles has responded.
You pick up your phone quickly and see a couple of texts.
First from Whitney:
Text me when you’re in. Love you! Thanks so much for a great night xxx
Then from your husband:
Okay, text me if you need me to pick you up in the morning. Night, love you x
But it’s the third message that piques your interest the most. From Charles:
You changed your mind? We’re on the way home now. Here’s my address if you’re still up for it? X
You can’t help but smile to yourself. As the Uber driver pulls up outside of your apartment building, you look up towards your apartment window, the curtains are closed but a flicker of light is breaking out from the lamp on inside. Knowing Lewis is awake prompts you to make your next decision and you hand your phone to the Uber driver.
“Sorry, I need to go to this address instead”.
The Uber drive grunts at you but he begrudgingly types in the new address before pulling off. You can’t help but smile to yourself as he drives away from your building , and you let out a little giggle as excitement starts to course through your body. That tingly sensation is back as you type your next text:
Charles: I’m on my way x
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itsmealaiah · 3 months
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You don't?
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Content warning: semi rough sex in the beginning, crying, tom being sweet, soft, content sex to make up for it, smut under cut, cuteness/ affection at the end, assumptions, mention of daddy issues
request by @tonikaulitz89:
Can you do a Tom Kaulitz smut/fluff (like at the same time) where the fem reader has daddy issues and from his experience girls with daddy issues like rough sex (that's just from some of my friends idk if it's for all of them) so Tom thinks that too but it actually scares reader and reader opens up to Tom about that and how rough sex actually scares reader and reader prefer soft, sweet, vanilla sex and Tom is actually more than happy to do that and he also apologises for thinking reader likes rough sex. (This is just how it is for me, also sorry for the long ask)
minors do not interact
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As Tom lay in bed, aroused as fuck and aching for you, he couldn't help but chuckle to himself. He had always been attracted to women with daddy issues, and from his experience, they tended to enjoy rough sex. He figured it was just something they liked in their little, fucked up worlds. But then again, maybe it was just him. He didn't want to push you too far, especially if it made you uncomfortable.
But when you moaned and cried out his name as he roughly fucked you, he couldn't help but feel a surge of adrenaline course through his veins. It was exhilarating, and he could tell it was driving you wild. He thrust deeper, harder, and faster, loving the way your body moved with his. He knew you were close, and when you finally came, your cries filling the room, he felt himself explode inside you.
Afterward, as you lay panting and sweaty in his arms, he couldn't help but wonder if he had gone too far. He knew you liked it, but maybe it scared you a little too. "Are you okay, baby?" he murmured, running a soothing hand over your back. "Did I hurt you?"
You looked up at him, tears still in your eyes, and shook your head. "No, it's not that… I mean, it was… amazing… but I… I don't really like it like that," you confessed, your voice shaking. "I prefer… soft, sweet, vanilla sex… You know, where I feel safe and loved."
Tom felt a pang in his chest at your words. He'd never thought he'd be the one to make you feel uncomfortable. "Oh, baby… I'm sorry. I thought… I mean, with daddy issues and everything…" He trailed off, feeling like a complete idiot. "I'll make it up to you. I promise."
You snuggled closer to him, tears still streaming down your face. "It's not your fault… really. I should have said something… I just… I never thought I'd find anyone who'd understand." You looked up at him, hopeful. "Can we try again? Just… soft and gentle… ?"
Tom nodded, feeling a wave of relief wash over him. "Of course, love. I'd love to. I'll be as gentle and loving as you want me to be." He kissed your forehead, already feeling more connected to you than he ever had before. "I promise."
He rolled you onto your back, gently pulling the covers up over you both. Then, he positioned himself between your legs, his erection now soft and pliable. He looked down at you, admiring your beauty, and brushed a stray hair from your face.
Slowly, he lowered himself onto you, taking care not to hurt you. The feeling of being inside you, so soft and warm, made him shiver. He began to move, rocking his hips back and forth in a gentle rhythm. It was unlike anything he'd ever experienced before, but it felt right.
As he continued, he looked into your eyes, wanting to make sure you were comfortable and enjoying yourself. Your hands found their way to his shoulders, guiding him, urging him on. He increased the pace slightly, still keeping it slow and sensual.
You moaned his name, arching your back into him, and he could feel you begin to tighten around him. He knew you were close, and he picked up the pace a little more, wanting to bring you over the edge together. Your cries filled the room as your body convulsed beneath him, and he felt himself follow, his release spilling deep inside you.
As the last tremors subsided, he collapsed on top of you, panting heavily. He couldn't believe how good that felt. It was unlike anything he'd ever experienced before. He propped himself up on his elbows, looking down at you, his chest heaving. You were still catching your breath, your chest rising and falling rapidly beneath his hand. He traced the outline of your lips with his finger, feeling the softness of your skin against his calloused fingertip.
"You okay, baby?" he whispered, his voice hoarse.
You nodded, still catching your breath, and wiped the tears from your eyes.
"I'm okay, really… That was… incredible," you managed to say between ragged breaths. Your body felt warm and tingly all over, and you couldn't help but smile up at him. You ran your fingers through his sweaty hair, feeling the familiar weight of it in your hand.
He smiled down at you, his eyes twinkling. "Good. I'm glad I could make you feel that way." He leaned down, his lips brushing against yours. "You're so beautiful, you know that?" he murmured, his hand trailing down your side, over your hip and back up again, cupping your breast through the thin fabric of your nightie.
Your breath caught in your throat as he found your nipple, rolling it between his thumb and forefinger. You arched into his touch, feeling the familiar ache begin to return. "Tom…" you breathed, your voice trembling. "I think I want more…"
He pulled back, his eyes searching yours for confirmation. You nodded eagerly, your heart pounding in anticipation. He kissed you again, deeper this time, his tongue sliding against yours. His hands found their way underneath you, lifting you up so that your legs were wrapped around his waist.
He began to move again, his thrusts harder and faster this time, his hips meeting yours in a rhythm that was both familiar and thrilling. You cried out his name, the pleasure coursing through you, making your toes curl and your fingernails dig into his shoulders. He groaned into your neck, his body shuddering as he came, spilling deep inside you.
As your orgasm washed over you, you arched your back off the bed, your cries muffled against his shoulder. He held you close, his body still moving even as he came back down to earth. Finally, he collapsed onto the bed beside you, panting heavily, his chest heaving against yours.
You lay there for a moment, catching your breath, feeling the afterglow of the incredible sex begin to spread through your body. You smiled up at Tom, feeling grateful for the way he'd been able to give you both what you needed tonight. "That was amazing," you whispered, running your fingers through his sweaty hair. "Thank you."
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goldenlikedayl1ght · 18 days
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matilda - m. murdock
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a/n: hey guys i have back pain and i have daddy issues so i wanted to write a quick blurb about it. so. sorry if you guys cant particularly relate to this one it's for me <3 warnings: ANGST, reader cries a lot, probably cursing, lots of daddy issues, lots of being upset, mentions of fathers being drunk, matt picks up the reader but matt in my brain can lift like 250+ so, uhhhh i don't know guys just angst and daddy issues ! word count: 1.2k summary: you have daddy issues and back pain. matt does his best to help. pairing: matt murdock x gn!reader now playing: matilda - harry styles "i don't believe that time will change your mind/in other words, I know they won't hurt you anymore/as long as you can let them go"
Matt finds you on the floor of the kitchen, your knees hugged against your chest. He is so tired, bruises starting to really hurt after sitting all purple and blue on his ribs and his arms. He’s just in his boxers his hair damp from a shower.
You are just in a pair of boxers and a muscle tee. Your knuckles are white, and you are staring into space in the most literal definition. It’s four a.m. You are a twenty something year old adult, you have not slept in your mother’s bed in years.
And yet, you feel like a child.
And your back is fucking killing you.
Matt sits next to you on the kitchen floor, goosebumps shooting up his skin as his feet and palms feel the cold, rough tile floor. His hand finds your arm and gently rubs his thumb against your skin.
“What’re you doing on the floor, sweetheart?” His voice is low and thick with sleep. He is so tired, that his words aren’t nearly as poetic, sappy or flirtatious as he wants them to be (maybe not all at once, but he most certainly wished they were better than that).
You consider lying to him for a moment. Really, you do. You could tell him that the floor is just more comfortable, that you want him to fuck you right here against the tiles, that you just could not sleep, that there is nothing deeper than a busy brain that cannot calm down.
“My dad called me while you were away.” You tell him, your voice soft. Matt will be able to hear it no matter how loudly or quietly you say it. And at your confession, he tenses. He has a complicated relationship with your father, but his relationship is calm compared to the raging waters that make up how you feel about the man.
“Okay,” he starts, rubbing your arm gently. “And what did he say?”
You blink.
“Nothing. Nothing that should have made me feel like this.” You tell him, a horrible taste in your mouth. From what, you do not know. Matt doesn’t respond right away, waiting for you to tell him more. “He was drunk.” You say quietly.
“Oh.” He knows you don’t drink. He knows you have a very complicated relationship with substances. “I can understand why that might be upsetting..” he tries, and you shake your head, your face twisting into frustration, anger, and perhaps a hint of sadness.
“He’ll never change.” You whisper, too afraid to be any louder, too afraid that maybe from miles and miles away, your father will hear you. That maybe if you say it any louder, it won’t be a secret anymore, and that you’ll start crying if you say it any louder. “He’ll never ever change.” You say, and your head turns to look at him.
And you stare at the man that you love, and you stare and stare, and you think about Jack Murdock who loved his son so much that he was willing to die for him to have a better life, that he was entirely selfless when it came to the person you are lucky enough to call yours.
And you think about how your father wants nothing to do with you. He never did. Not really.
That’s when you start to cry.
It starts with a few tears rolling down your cheeks, salty and fat, as if they hold all of the memories your brain has locked away to protect you. Then, the tears come out faster, and faster, until you are choking on your own breath, racking with sobs. Matt’s arms are around you in an instant.
He pulls you close to him, and you feel bad for getting tears all over his skin. He’ll tell you it’s his fault for wearing just briefs. He pulls you into his lap, and while you cry into his neck, his hand comes down to your back and slips under your shirt, gently rubbing it up and down.
You twitch at the feeling, your back still aching as you sit with him, the pain contributing to your tears. Matt’s lips kiss your forehead, and he just holds you for a long time. Your breathing becomes short with how violently you’re sobbing.
“Hey, easy..” he says softly before he tilts your head up to look at him. “Your breathing isn’t healthy. Come on, watch me,” and he takes deep breathes in and out, expecting you to copy his attempts. When you’re finally at a point where you an breath on your own, Matt begins wiping your tears gently.
“Sorry…” You say quietly. He just shushes you softly and leans in to kiss your cheek.
“You never have to apologize for your emotions.” He promises, “I love you so much. I am so sorry he’s like that,” and now Matt is crying and he’s not sure why, but you feel awful about it, so your shaky hands come up to wipe his tears and he wants to laugh at your attempt at gentleness because he wonders how often you were shown the same kindness and his heart aches at the most realistic answer.
“Honey, you never have to worry about him again. You made it out, he can’t hurt you anymore..” He tells you, and you try to believe him. “You’ll never feel anything except safe and loved, I promise.” He says quietly, before leaning in to kiss you gently. “Is there anything else?” He senses that you are in physical pain too. Partially because he can tell by how your jaw clenches that you are tense, but even without his super senses, he just knows you aren’t feeling well.
He knows you too well.
“My back is killing me.” You confess, and he frowns. “And my head now.” Your head always hurts after crying.
“Okay,” He nods, “Hold tight,” and somehow, your fucking angel of a man picks you up off the floor and carries you to bed. He steps away only to grab you a glass of water and some Advil. You take it quietly, chugging the water before he sits on the bed next to you.
“Thank you for taking care of me.” You whisper, still upset, but so so grateful. He just smiles sadly and leans in to kiss you gently. Then, he pulls away to ask,
“How about I give you a quick back massage and then we get to bed? You must be tired. I know I am.” You sigh and nod, shifting so you’re laying on your stomach.
Matt leans down and kisses your shoulder before whispering, “I meant it you know. You made it out. You’re safe. You’re loved.”
And even without being a human lie detector like him, you can tell he’s telling the truth. It makes you cry more, but Matt stays to wipe the tears away. He’ll always stay. And he’ll always tell you as much when you need the reminder.
You’re safe.
You’re loved.
These words echo in your brain as you drift off to sleep, Matt holding you close, fingers tracing patterns into your skin as you fall into a dreamless sleep, focusing on the warmth that radiates off him.
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ninma · 2 months
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I just noticed a very interesting note in Alastor's ad in episode 1...
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Who in Hazbin Hotel is the most associated with circus decor?
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Lucifer.
Less than 5 min into episode 1 and we already get a hint that Alastor isn't a big fan of Lucifer.
Which is interesting because it implies that Alastor disliked Lucifer before he even involved himself with the hotel. They hadn't even met yet.
It's such a weirdly specific thing to add to a commercial too. Because when I think hotel, circus decor wouldn't be anywhere on my list of expectations.
It's clearly targeted towards Lucifer. An indirect insult Alastor probably had wanted Lucifer to see.
If this is the case, some of Alastor's commentary can be looked at slightly differently.
Lines like "Lucifer's delusional daughter", "Daddy issues" and the other insulting commentary can then also be partly aimed at Lucifer.
Which would probably be effective hits because Lucifer definitely wouldn't be happy about someone offending his daughter, but the "Daddy issues" line would probably make him feel guilt.
It's as if Alastor wanted to pick a fight the first chance he got to potentially reach Lucifer.
But like...why?
In episode 5 we have a reasonable explanation for why Alastor is poking at Lucifer. Alastor likes to be in control and have power over others, however even he knows Lucifer is more powerful than him. Therefore he aims at Lucifer's relationship with Charlie (which is what the dad comments are really about) to regain some of that power.
Which is why it doesn't make any sense for him to indirectly target Lucifer in episode 1.
Why pick a fight with the King of Hell when he barely had anything to hold over Lucifer?
When this ad was made, Charlie had known Alastor for only a week and therefore claiming to be close to her would be weird.
Heck, Alastor is even insulting Charlie and the hotel here, which definitely doesn't give him any favour from her.
Another point could be that Alastor is also partly annoyed at having to make a video. He probably doesn't expect it to air. But that still doesn't explain why he'd deliberately add a note directed at Lucifer.
So.....What's the deal here Alastor?
There isn't a clear reason for doing this.
The only one I can guess that makes some sense is that Alastor just wanted to feel some sense of power by indirectly insulting Lucifer, who is the most powerful being in all of Hell. Getting a chance to hit him where it hurts would probably bring Alastor a lot of satisfaction.
Another option is that it could be related to Lilith, if she turned out to be the one he made a deal with. It could be that Alastor's frustration over his deal makes him want to take it out on Lucifer (since he obviously can't take it out on Charlie). Lilith telling him to do it is possible, but I find it unlikely. Unless her real motive was pushing Lucifer out of his isolation and back into Charlie's life. Still find it unlikely tho.
In the end, it still feels weird for Alastor to be this intent on picking on Lucifer this early on. Taking advantage of the first opportunity to have a message reach Lucifer, despite Alastor neither having power or leverage over him if Lucifer had responded.
So...Alastor...
Care to spill the tea on why you're being so pissy?
(Sorry, couldn't resist-)
EDIT: I just realized how funny it is that despite saying there is no tacky circus decor, the hotel itself is FULL of it XD
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Now that I think about it, that might actually be the joke behind the note.
(Admittedly, this might just be a fun bit of foreshadowing and doesn't really have any deeper meaning)
(Also, Lucifer's circus decor isn't tacky. I'd definitely be down for staying at a hotel with his aesthetic and decor. But, maybe that's just me)
(It kinda reminds me of how Vox immediately went to send a message to Alastor on TV the moment he learned of his return XD)
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l0v3tast3 · 1 year
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AHH Hello!!! I absolutely love your writing, it’s so good!!!!
I was wondering…
Y/n always wear a mask to conceal her identity, in hopes the 141 doesn’t find out that Makarov is her father!!
141 had captured Makarov for interrogation, and y/n is there. As the interrogation continues, they start to notice that y/n and Makarov know each other, by the subtle little informality they spoke to one another. And the truth starts to come out, little by little!!!!
✎ tysm i love you :(( i absolutely love this idea the angst potential is just *chef's kiss* i'm sorry this one took like over a month to make oops, also i tried to keep personal details abt the reader as vague as possible, pls let me know if there's something i can fix!!
✎ tags: female reader, military reader, major daddy issues, violence, mentions of blood, hurt/barely any comfort if at all, not proofread im too cool for that,
✎ word count: 2,704
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the silence in the cold, gray interrogation room was so thick that you were choking on it. you knew you had just fucked up, badly.
you had done so well so far, too. you're fabricated identity had fooled everyone. the name you had chosen stuck, and no one ever noticed your old one threatening to jump from your mouth when you introduced yourself. you always kept the childhood memories and little anecdotes vague. you stuck to your rehearsed lines better than a world-famous actor. you did every single thing right.
and now, here he was, your own blood, fucking it all up for you, again.
technically, he had made you fuck it up for yourself. it was just how makarov worked; he was a spider weaving a web in the corner, watching, waiting. this man, your supposed father, didn't know anything real about you. he didn't know you as a father should know his daughter. but he knew which buttons to press.
he only knew what to say to you when it would allow him the opportunity of watching you fall a little deeper towards rock bottom.
you knew that the room had cameras covering every square inch, and the microphones ensured that you're accidental admission to your heritage was heard by your entire task force.
there was a red hot pit opening inside of you, caving your insides in like a black hole and threatening to consume your entire being. it was rage, you realized. something you only ever seemed to feel in the presence of one person.
you briefly considered killing him, right there and then. was this really the straw that broke your back? it truly was just another thing to add to the list. you had known he would do this.
no, you were angry at yourself.
on the other side of the door, the four men of the 141 task force were all stood still in shock. what the hell did you just say?
none of them wanted to believe it. they especially didn't want to admit that it made sense. you had done a fucking fantastic job of hiding it, they'll admit that, but even you couldn't hide everything.
price saw the way you tensed when you were passed laswell's photo of makarov in the bar, after you had all put an end to hassan's plan. he saw the way you dropped it and slid it to the next person quickly, as if touching the picture had burned your fingertips.
soap had asked you if you were okay more than once during the plane ride to russia. you were so restless, so different from your usual grounded self. you just said you were having some flying anxiety. he felt stupid now for writing it off so easily.
and kyle, the first one to trust you (and to even really talk to you), he had seen the anger sparking off of you while you shot your way through the tower to get to makarov. floor after floor, bullet after bullet, you had paved a path of blood through the mercenaries. he wondered if someone else had taken your mask and gear and was pretending to be you.
simon saw the fear in you when you all got to the last door. you had been so quick in your endeavor to get here, but he saw you hesitate to follow them in. he saw how you never took your wide eyes off of him, and how you stayed a few steps back, moving far out of the way when price began to escort him out in handcuffs.
and when they had asked you to go into the interrogation room, they all saw how you stopped breathing, and the sweat collecting on what little skin they could see above your mask. you had stuttered when you quietly agreed.
when you stepped into the room, makarov took one look at your eyes, and you knew he recognized you. no, he recognized the hatred. and it made him smile.
now, sitting in the cold metal chair, you realized that it wasn't just one mistake, but a series of them; you had let him unravel you, again. you understood, finally, that he saw you as he did everyone else. he saw you as someone that held him back.
part of you had always known, ever since you were young, still single-digits, and he would only visit you once every few months, if that. you had elected to ignore it. now you couldn't.
you couldn't move. behind you was the door that would lead you to the consequences of your actions. in front of you was the reason for those actions.
this is what you had wanted, wasn't it? it was like something snapped back into place, and you suddenly remembered that everything you had done up until now, every time you put the mask on before leaving your room, every lie you had told and every person you had killed had been to get you here. in front of your father. you remembered that the image of him with a bullet between his eyes was what kept you going.
if you killed him, would it finally absolve you? the gun on your hip felt twenty pounds heavier now. your fingers, folded together in your lap with a white-knuckle grip, felt like lead. would this sin make all the other wrongs right?
a tiny voice was telling you to just walk away, let the team's wrath come down on you and let them deal with makarov, but you had already thrown the table between you towards the wall, he was already on the ground with your hands wrapped around his throat.
you were yelling, no, screaming at him. all the compacted feelings from years and years of being as quiet as possible came up like vomit, spewing out in a mess that could never be cleaned up.
there were more than just makarov's hands on you, pushing and pulling you away from him and dragging you out of the room, kicking and screeching to let you just finally kill him, while two other blurry shapes hauled him back into his own chair.
the heavy metal door shut behind the two people practically carrying you, and they finally let you go. you stumbled a few steps away, whirling around for the next target of your fury.
your captain and lieutenant were standing in front of you, both tensed, waiting for you to do something. you couldn't exactly make out their faces- were you crying?
"what in the bloody hell just happened in there?" price snarled. it was the voice he used when he was face to face with his enemy.
"let me back in there." it was a demand. you needed to kill him.
"that's not gonna happen," simon barked. john and kyle had come out from the interrogation room to stand behind the other two men. "you need to explain, now."
they all stared at you with varying looks of anger and hurt. it wasn't the first time you'd ever had it directed at you, but this was somehow worse than all the others.
every cell in your body was shrieking at you to just run for the door, to somehow get through all four of these men, your teammates, your friends, and kill makarov. but their glares glued you to your spot.
"please-" your voice was trembling, years of grief and agony dripping from every word, "please, just let me kill him. you have to let me kill him." you spoke slowly and quietly, focusing on just trying to get the words out. you took a shaky breath and focused your eyes on a muddy bootprint on the floor. you didn't want to see the looks on their faces.
"you don't understand, you just- just let me back in there, please, i'll get whatever you need out of him, but he needs to die!" your voice was getting louder, and you briefly wondered if your father could hear you. "his men are probably already on their way here. don't you get it? if i don't kill him now, he will get out."
the men in front of you were more shocked now than anything at the change in your demeanor. you had been coined the "second ghost" throughout the units, partly for the mask, but also because of your detachment. you were kind, but you always held logic above emotion.
in front of them now was nothing short of a nervous wreck.
despite not moving, you were frantic. you were wringing your hands together, pressed tight against your stomach. your eyes darted from side to side, person to person, between them and the door to makarov.
price took a step forward and you took a step back. he was slow, bringing his hand up as if he were approaching a wild animal. if he was still angry, he was hiding it now.
"come on, kid, let's just get out of 'ere, eh? go somewhere away from him," he said lowly. the other three men watched tensely, not moving, but their hands still close to their guns. just in case.
"no, no- just let me- price, you need to let me back in there!" you were a broken record, you knew it, but there was nothing else to say, nothing else you could think about. this was what you had been waiting for, you were right where you had wanted to be for the past- how many years now? how long has he tormented you for now?
you could feel your father's presence in the next room like bugs crawling across your body. it made your head feel fuzzy and your hands shake. was it from rage or fear? you couldn't tell, so you chose the rage.
it was like bile stuck in your throat, all the pain makarov had caused you finally being unearthed. you wanted to throw it all up and spit it out onto him, lay your organs and hatred alike out on the table in front of him so he could see the decay. you wanted him to rot from the inside out like you had.
your eyes glanced at the door one last time before focusing on price. he was watching you, just a couple of steps in front of you now.
"let me back in there, john." it was a whisper, but still the steadiest thing you had spoken since they had dragged you out.
"no." he said your name quietly, and you heard it as the plea it was, but you're head decided it was done listening.
your body threw itself at him, swinging underneath his arms and onto his back to try and get him on the ground. the room exploded into yelling, and multiple pairs of hands were on you in an instant, hauling you off of price and forcing you face-down onto the ground with your hands behind your back.
cold metal latching around your wrists didn't stop your screaming and kicking, lashing out at the air around you. it didn't work well, because you were being hauled back to your feet and pushed into a separate interrogation room.
whoever was carrying you didn't bother with trying to attach your handcuffs to the table, basically throwing you in and slamming the door shut before you could get back on your feet.
outside the cell, the four men stood in silent shock. what was there to say, where would they even start? would they really be able to hear each other over your muffled screams to let you out?
you didn't know how long you had been in there once the door finally opens again, but you had stopped screaming and struggling to get out of the room. you had sat down at the table, your hands folded in front of you on the cold surface. you stared down at the blood beading and smearing around the handcuffs.
kyle squeezed in through the tiny amount he'd let the door open before he shut it quickly, keeping his eyes on you. you didn't look up, your red eyes staying fixed on one point even as he slowly moved closer. he followed them to see the red rings underneath the steel, and a pang of guilt squeezed his heart tight.
he sat down across from you, folding his hands in front of him on the table, mirroring you. you still hadn't looked up at him, or done anything to acknowledge his presence; you hadn't even moved.
"are you alright?" kyle implored. he kept his voice soft, bending over a little to try to look you in the eye.
it took you a few moments to respond; he almost started to think you didn't hear him before you opened your mouth slowly.
"is he dead?" you croaked.
kyle let out an audible sigh while he leaned back in his seat, bringing his hands up to drag them down his face.
"no, we still need him. you know that."
you didn't say anything after that.
after sitting in silence for two full minutes, he spoke up. "you realize not telling us about this makes you look really bad, yeah?"
"you don't trust me anymore?" you whispered it, like you didn't want him to hear and answer. you knew what he would say.
"you aren't making it very easy."
kyle wanted to trust you still. part of him was angry and confused as to why you had kept something like this from them. the other part, the bigger part of him, knew that you were on still on the same side of it all. and he knew the other three men felt the same, but they couldn't just dismiss this.
"we can work this out, ya' know. you just have to be honest with us," he added after you once again stayed silent.
"be honest?" you echoed. you finally looked up at him. "about what? you heard me. makarov is my father. i want him dead. that's all there is to say."
kyle took his turn to not speak, weighing your words, figuring out where to go from there.
"why didn't you tell us?" he finally asked.
you looked back down at your wrists. "if i had told you i was makarov's daughter before i joined the team, then all i would have ever been is makarov's daughter." you paused to take a deep, shaky breath. it was uncomfortable with your mask still on, wet with tears, but you refused to take it off, to give away the last piece of your identity that was still yours at the moment.
"it's something we should have known," he contended quickly. "we could have used the information you have-"
you cut him off, your eyes snapping back up to glare daggers at him. "you think i know anything more than you?" you barked. something between a laugh and a sob escaped your throat before you could continue. "i was eight years old the last time i saw him in person. i was raised by live-in nannies. he only visited, what, maybe twice a year? and i don't know why he even bothered, either."
your hands were clenched into tight fists, and the same sting that circled your wrists was appearing in your palms. you kept going though; you didn't know if you could stop now.
"every time i get somewhere, every time i start making a life for myself again, he fucks it all up. never showed his damn face, but it was him, it was always-" you finally cut yourself off, not wanting to drag more memories out from the dark.
"makarov may be my father, but i am not his daughter. i swear, kyle, i fucking swear it." you were pleading with him to believe you now. you needed them to understand.
you could see it in the way his eyebrows creased that he wanted to take your words as the truth. but he didn't say anything (what could he have said?).
the door opened once again, and price half-entered the room to wave kyle back out. he avoided your gaze, something he'd never done before. then you were alone again.
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yawnderu · 2 months
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It's a thought that entered my mind deeper and deeper as I noticed how any time here somebody describes dad Simon... Well it's always about a daughter and rarely a son.
It's a common thing that Simon would have difficulties with bonding with his son because of his shitty father?
In my case, I've always written Dad!Simon as someone with a daughter because that's the way I personally see him. I don't know if for other authors it goes deeper than simply thinking Simon seems like a girl dad. :O
It's mainly the irony about this big bloke who's known for being scary, having a tiny daughter waiting for him at home. Simon doesn't break, not even torture managed to break him, yet he bends to his daughter's will simply because she's the apple in his eye.
His daughter wants Simon to bake her something? Sure, the man used to eating shitty MREs and buying takeout will take the time to learn how to bake a pretty cake, even if it doesn't come out well at first. His daughter wants to do his makeup? He's never put anything on his face other than eyeblack, yet he's sitting on the couch, his daughter right next to him and applying a mess of pink, sparkly glitter all over his face.
It's the image of Simon allowing himself to be softer and more vulnerable, raising a little girl who always looks like a tiny carbon copy of him. Both of his girls (his wife and daughter) make him feel like a proper man, puffed out in pride every single time he makes both of you laugh.
The daddy issues go absolutely insane for me, so seeing girl dads and dads loving their daughters always makes me really happy. :')
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forever--darling · 2 months
Text
summary: after three years spent away from home because of nasty divorce between your parents, you finally come back & realize that this time you might not be able to keep sam monroe away any longer.
pairings: sam monroe x reader
word count: 1.6k
warnings/notes: swearing, mentions of death, mentions of past feelings, mentions of childhood trauma, divorce, daddy issues, allusions to sex
masterlist
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There was a lot of things you could attest to even only at twenty-one. After experiencing everything you had under one roof, it wasn’t hard not to grow up fast. To learn just how horrible it is loving someone because of what it can do to you. Something that still remained true even if both of your parents remarried because everything still sounded the same within that forsaken house.
The walls spoke the same languages that your parents would as they whispered, which eventually would become yelling. The indents still lingered with chipped paint near where your height marks resided in the doorframe. It was just as it had been at six and then eleven. Yet at twenty-one, having come home for the first time in over three years, to a house that now only is full of your father’s stuff, it only felt more vacant. More sad and debilitating. 
Your sister never seemed to really accept any of that though, instead choosing to ignore it in favor of the free meals your father cooked or the platinum credit cards he would hand over. Something you were sure would pass along to you as well, anything to try and make you forget it all. But you didn’t. You couldn’t. 
Which was why you still hadn’t ever been in a relationship, let alone ever hangout with anyone long enough to form an attachment. It was the only real reason you had never made a move on Sam Monroe when you were seventeen and in high school. Even as you both sat on a dusty couch littered with weed and beer in some abandoned basement. Even as he stared at you the way he had from behind, the black eyeliner and shadow, blue eyes practically undressing you, almost pulling you forward by a string. You had been a little high and a lot drunk, and yet, you still couldn’t. Not even after having had a crush on him for well over three years. Three years and you left that basement without one kiss or his fingers even tracing along the inside of your underwear. 
Seventeen and even then you couldn’t let yourself like someone let alone get to the point of loving them. 
So, how would it be any different? Sam Monroe stood in front of you that afternoon, under the hot sun, just outside the new house he and his father had built. Sweat stuck to his shirt, dark hair still present but void of blue dye. His piercings were there but left empty, and you couldn’t see any makeup. It hadn’t even looked like him at first. 
But it was, and the shirt gave him away, that in the way your stomach immediately clenched, the familiarity of him enough to make you fall back into that last summer spent in that town before you left for college. 
“Y/N?” his voice was deep, deeper than you had remembered, a sudden twang of confusion filling your ears as he processed your presence. 
Standing in your father’s driveway, boxes scattered at your feet, hair pulled back messily out of your face, and beads of sweat appearing along your shoulders and neck. Still beautifully you. 
“Sam, hi!” 
You were just as surprised as him. Even more so as he seemed so different and yet still completely Sam; just taller, broader, even more like his father than you were expecting. 
“You’re here.” 
It sounded so much more like a question than a statement. 
“Yeah.” 
“Like you’re here in your dad’s driveway.” 
You couldn’t help but laugh, “Yes.” 
“It’s been three years.” 
You stiffened, feeling as if your bones would break like they really did feel how long it had been and how much time had passed. It really had been that long. “I know. It’s been a while.” 
“Too long, really,” he admitted, and somehow it had never sounded so charming before than it had then. That sudden shock seemed to melt away, and what only remained was a softness you hadn’t seen in him before. A teasing smile appeared as he took you in again. 
You felt the lump appear in your throat, somehow matching the tightness in your chest. It was only Sam who could ever make you feel that way, even after three years. 
“How are you?” he asked, stepping forward, his hand extending almost as if he wanted to touch you, possibly pull you into him. You didn’t know, but some part of you wished it would be the latter. A part of you craved a touch you had never met before. 
“I’m good. Really good, actually.” 
“Yeah, it looks that way,” he replied, enough to stain your cheeks with a newfound pink. “How in that time did you manage to grow up?” 
“Me?” you giggled, pushing him lightly, your fingers lingering where they touched his forearm, “Look at you.” 
He chuckled, that glint evident as ever, “What about me?” 
“You have a house, Monroe. An actual house that I’m sure you pay taxes on with a job.” 
“Yes.” 
“And college?” 
“Online classes, yeah,” he confirmed and you coudn’t deny the wide smile that appeared. 
Almost like a swell of pride had formed — a sudden amazement that he really had done it proved everyone wrong in that fucking town. 
“That’s great, Sam. It really is,” you smiled, that urge to touch him again appearing, but it somehow waned at the thought, “I was sorry to hear about your dad.” 
He cleared his throat, the light diminishing but only briefly as his eyes danced across yours, almost trying to find something in them, “Yeah, thanks.”
“I can’t assume it was easy.” 
“No.” 
“I wish we could’ve been here for the funeral. I wanted to, but my professors wouldn’t let me reschedule my exams.” 
“It’s okay, I understand. Both your parents sent very kind letters to us. I really appreciated them.” 
You nodded, not knowing a response to it other than you should have done more. Texted, called, or tried to come back earlier, earlier than now, when you were only moving home for the summer. It was Sam. The way you felt about him was everything, really. Yet you were too consumed in the comfort of the distance and hiding. That was what you had focused on for so long. 
Your head bowed, eyes unable to meet his, instead finding comfort in his sambas, and the green grass. Inhaling, you glanced up at the house. The house you never even saw complete until then. You took it in. “It truly is a beautiful house. You guys did a great job.” 
“Yeah I think so too. Plus, it looked like it needed an adult to live in it.” 
You looked back at him, the teasing demeanor having completely taken over his expression in the form of dark knitted brows and his bottom lip tucked between his teeth. “Adult?” 
“Yes, since you think I’m so grown up.” 
“You are, and I never thought I would see the day, Monroe. But, it seems I have.” 
“It seems so. Finally, Y/N Y/L/N is home.” 
“Yeah,” you agreed, somehow feeling a small sliver of the universe realign. Perhaps by the way he was looking at you or the reality that would become of you because of him. Feelings you were sure never really left in the first place. “I will say not much has changed around here. Well, except for one thing.”
His brows furrowed, lip lifting in interest as you took in his clean face. 
“The black eyeliner. I'm not lying when I say I might miss it.” 
“Really?” he chuckled. 
“Yeah, it was totally working.” 
“Working?”
You nodded, a teasing look of your own apparent, “Yeah. It was hot. Hm, just never thought you would be so different.” 
“Different?” he scoffed, the words somehow completely wrong as they left your lips, “I’m not that different, Y/N. I’m still me.” 
“Right,” you nodded, eyes following how his chest rose and fell, the t-shirt alone catching your attention, the bright yellow words somehow something you would expect to be said, “Well, I’m glad some things stayed the same.”
He smirked, following my gaze to the front of his shirt. It was black with bright yellow bolded writing which said, ‘I’m good in bed. I can sleep all day.’  The same type of fucking shirt that seventeen-year-old him would wear, seeming unable to part from the looks he would get when people would read them. 
“God, you wore stupid shirts like this all the time.” 
“Hey! I find them pretty funny. They’re charming if anything.” 
“Charming?” you laughed, the word fitting Sam exactly though you were sure no other girl would have described it that way back then. “It can only be charming if it’s true.” 
“True?” 
“Yes,” you replied, the word a mere mumble as you truly noted how it felt with him standing so close, looming over you. 
“Well, how about you can be the one to decide if it’s charming. Let you tell me if I am good in bed or not. Would make for an interesting summer, wouldn’t it?”
You knew then you were fucked. So completely and inevitably because you had waited that long. Since you were seventeen sitting in that hot gross basement, him only a few inches from you. You had waited, and suddenly Sam seemed so much more tantalizing, enough so you would maybe give in. Just this once.
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calumsrockstar · 4 months
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Bunny - Ashton Irwin
a/n: DADDY ISSUES NATION RISE! This is my longest fic until now, and it´s inspired by @rip-quizilla.
word count: 3k
Where you find a mysterious hot neighbor.
Contents: MAJOR AGE GAP (reader is 19 and Ash is 44), perv!ash, spanking, pet names, praise, unprotected p in v, oral (f and m recieving) masturbation (f and m), corruption kink, daddy kink
Older!Ash x Reader
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You entered your brand new house, it was small, but spacious considering it was your first. Your mom and your dad finally let you move out, giving you all the privacy you needed.
For the first month everything was normal, until you heard almost every mom in the neighborhood talk about a handsome and mysterious Mr. Irwin. Only to notice that he was living right next to you.
You were curious, since moving to the neighborhood, you´ve never seen what he looked like, your window was right opposite his, but he always kept the curtain closed.
Adjusting yourself, you looked at the mirror and flattened your yellow sundress. It was a hot summer day, and what better way to quench your thirst than to deliver lemonade to your supposedly hot neighbor?
You opened the fridge to get a large jug of your homemade lemonade, and left the house, leaving the front door unlocked.
Walking to his house, you took deep breaths, and knocked on the door. Now you wait.....
A tall man opened the door, looking to be in his 20s. His light brown hair looked soft and curly. his skin sunkissed. "Hi there." He smiled. Making you forget why you were there.
Holy shit.
"Um-hi." You smiled. "I moved here a month ago and I ́ve never said hello, I decided to bring you some lemonade. Some friendly neighbor activity." You chuckled.
He looked you up and down, basically devouring you with his eyes. "That's awfully kind of you." You detected some kind of accent. "It 's no problem." You replied.
"Sorry if this is too direct but, how come i´ve never seen you before?" You asked him. "At my age, I don't go out of my house much honey, I like to read, play music." You raised an eyebrow. "Your age? Like 25?"
He let out a throaty laugh. "You flatter me." Making you smile. "How old are you?" You asked. "If you don't mind me asking of course." He grinned. "Guess."
"28?" He shook his head no. "30?" He shook his head no again. "35?" You asked, hoping you didn't say he was too old. "More." He grinned. "No fucking way." You replied. "40?" He clicked his tongue. "You're getting closer." Your mouth was practically on the floor. "I´m 44, sweetheart."
"What? That's insane." You smiled. "You definitely don't look or act 44." You said. "Hey, how is a 44 year old supposed to act?" He chuckled. "I don´t know, smoking cigars on your front porch, maybe?" You smiled. "I´m young at heart, you know." He leaned down to talk to you.
"How old are you, little lady?" He grinned. "I'm 19." He widened his hazel eyes. "19, wow. Basically a baby." You fake pouted. "I'm not a baby." You smiled, teasingly. "You are to me." He replied. You frowned. Did he actually think of you as a kid?
"What´s a young girl like you doing living all by herself?" He asked. "I just moved out, I wanted some privacy." You replied, making him raise an eyebrow. "Privacy, huh? You sure you´re not gonna throw any parties?"
You laughed. "That's not what all kids do these days, by the way. Maybe in your time, Mr. Irwin." You put your hand on your forehead. "That was rude, i´m sorry." He laughed. "How do you know my last name?" He smiled.
You turned pink. "Well, you must know that women talk about you." He raised an eyebrow. "Do they?" He chuckled. "Yeah, all the time." You replied.
"Can you tell me what they say?" He smiled, making you turn an even deeper shade of red. "Well, they all say you're really handsome and stuff... And how they wonder if you have a wife." You smiled. "No, I don't have one, sweetheart." He grinned.
Oh god yes.
"Oh, that's good to know. I mean, that's cool." You stuttered. Making him chuckle. "Well, I guess I´ll see you around, Mr. Irwin." You said turning your back. "Please, call me Ashton." He blurted out. "What's your name?" He asked. "It´s y/n." You smiled. "Nice to meet you y/n." I hope to see you soon." You looked over your shoulder and nodded.
When you turned around, Ashton couldn't help but look at your ass. It was sculpted and it drove him crazy. He could tell you were definitely trouble.
Ashton closed the door, and smiled. You were the only thing he could think of for hours. He wanted to get to know you, to know what your interests were, your life. He already was utterly obsessed. He felt like a teenager again, with hormones blossoming inside of him.
You were sweet and innocent, like a bunny. Something deep inside him wanted to ruin you.
You could not help thinking of him too. His tattooed arms, his curly hair, how his tank top hugged every place of him. How his shorts were tight around his bulge.
Shit. You wanted to fuck your 44 year old neighbor.
Ashton let his curiosity get the best of him. He finally opened his office window, to see if he could peek inside your house. Fortunately for him, this was the window directly opposite your bedroom.
After a long day, you decided to go to your bedroom to relax. Kicking off your shoes and getting out of your sundress. It was hot, so you absentmindedly left your bedroom window open, not knowing you had a spectator.
"Holy fuck." Ashton thought, his jaw was on the ground. You were wearing a lacy pink underwear set. The dim lighting in your room made you look ethereal.
Ashton was getting harder by the second. He knew this was wrong. Spying on his innocent little neighbor. But at this moment, he could care less.
You took off your bra, slowly. Ashton watched your breasts slip out of them, he thought he was dreaming. You were the most beautiful girl he's ever seen.
You reached in your bedroom drawer and found a pretty pink vibrator that you've stashed there. You laid down, tracing circles over your panties with the vibrator, letting out little whimpers.
"No fucking way." Ashton mouthed. He couldn't take it anymore. He took his cock out of his pants, bubbling with pre-cum. He felt like a pervert, but this turned him on even more.
Little y/n wasn't as innocent as he thought.
Taking off your panties, your pussy was on full display. Making Ashton´s mouth water.
You pressed the vibrator on your clit while you inserted two fingers inside of yourself, curling them. The shock made your back lift off the mattress, with a moan so loud you were sure your neighbor could hear.
All you wanted was Ashton. You wished his fingers were inside of you, you wished he was fucking you.
Ashton started to rub himself, watching intently. So what if you saw? He thought. His cock was throbbing, he was desperate to be inside you. Every muscle in his body ached for you.
You started to squirm, your clit throbbing with pulsing sensations that made you convulse in bed. While Ashton was shivering. This is the most turned on he´s been ever.
"Fuckfuckfuckfuck." You moaned while you bit your lip, feeling that familiar feeling in your stomach. Ashton started fucking his fist, harder and faster.
"Fuck! Ashton!" You screamed when you came. Putting your hand to your mouth when you realized what you said. At the same time, Ashton came all over his hand, panting hard. His curls were sticking to his forehead.
Did she just say my name? She couldn't have.
-----
In the morning you decided to lounge by the pool, and get some sun. You put on your favorite blue bikini and put your hair in a bun and headed out to the garden.
You opened up the door to your yard, secretly hoping a certain hazel eyed man would stumble in.
Sitting on a lounge chair, looking at your phone you noticed a tall figure looking down at you.
"Fuckin´ hot today, eh?" It was Ashton. A shirtless Ashton. Looking you up and down with no shame. "Good morning Mr. Irwin." You smiled. "You're finally out of the house." You added. "I wanted to see you, darling." He replied. Your mouth turned dry.
"You wanted to see me?" You repeated, making him smile. "Why do you want this old man out of your garden?" He chuckled, making you giggle. "Nah, c´mere." You told him, making a "Come hither" motion with your finger.
Just to think those were the fingers that were inside you last night made him shiver.
You tucked your legs in and motioned for him to sit at the tip of the lounging chair. When he sat, you spread your legs to fit around his thighs.
The only thing separating your pussy from his back was a flimsy piece of fabric.
"So, where are you from?" You asked him. "I´m originally from Australia, but I moved here a few years ago." You nodded. "Why´d you move?" You asked, picking at his sunburnt shoulders. "I think I just wanted to move on with my life, start a new chapter." He looked back at you and smiled. "Fair enough." You smiled back.
"I haven't noticed your tattoos." You said, stroking your hands on his arm. "Yeah got a few of them, love, years of experience." He smiled. "This one's my favorite." You pointed at his snake tattoo on his bicep. "It's one of my favorites too."
"Do you have any more tattoos?" You asked, rubbing both of his thighs. "y/n..." He melted into your touch. "I'm just asking." You grinned, placing a kiss on his neck. "Jesus Christ." He chuckled in between shallow breaths. "Are you sure?" He asked. You muttered an "mhm."
"I´ve seen you eye fucking me, Ashton, when we first met, when I was taking out the trash, right back then..."
He stood up, turned to face you, and sat back down."Dirty girl... When I was in college you weren't even born yet." You shrugged your shoulders, smiling. You could feel a wet patch growing in your bikini bottoms.
"I was touching myself thinking of you last night." You whispered, making him grin. "Me too." He chuckled. "You just looked so pretty yesterday... Your window was open." Your mouth dropped. "You perv!" You smiled. "Hey, you´re the one touching yourself thinking of an old man fucking you." He grinned.
"You looked so cute squirming, bunny." This sent shivers down your spine.
"Please kiss me." You pleaded. He wasted no time. He held your face with his two hands and kissed you, the kiss was fervent, urgent. Your tongues battling between each other, barely giving you space to breathe.
"Do anything you want to me, Ashton." You told him. "Anything?" He asked. "Anything." You smiled. "That´s a very bold claim to make." "I mean it." You smirked.
"Stand up." He ordered, doing the same as you. "You brought this upon yourself." He smiled, as he picked you up and threw you over his shoulder, making you scream and giggle.
He unlocked his front door and carried you inside. You observed three guitars and a huge drumset in his living room, complete with 10 pairs of drumming sticks.
He placed you on the couch that was big enough to fit four people, putting enough force for you to land with an "oomph."
"You look so cute, babygirl." He smiled, making you blush. You decided to make a risky move. "Thank you, daddy." You replied, waiting for his response.
You could see his eyes visibly darken, and his mouth turned into a grin. "Holy fuck, y/n." He smiled. "Want me to be your daddy?" He asked you. You could only mutter an "mhm." Your clit was throbbing, practically begging to be touched.
He trailed a finger through your bikini bottoms, making your whole body shiver. "So wet for me, and I haven't even touched you, bunny." He whispered in your ear. "Please, Ashton." You mewled.
He tugged at the strings of your bikini top and undid them. "You have such perfect tits, princess." He said, while fondling them. Placing his mouth on one and nipping at it, making you whimper. "So sensitive, too." He smiled.
Kneeling in front of you on the couch, he tugged on your bikini bottoms taking them off. You clenched your legs together, by instinct, blushing. "No need to be shy, princess." He smiled, gently pushing your legs apart and peppering little kisses on the inside of your thighs.
"Such a pretty pussy." He cooed. "Fuckin´ perfect."
He kitten licked your clit, making you let out a breathy moan. He looked up at you, waiting for your approval. You nodded and smiled, making him grin.
He grabbed your lower back with his big hands and pulled you closer to his face, making you gasp.
His pupils were blown out with lust. Dipping down to face your sex. Without warning, he dives in and you feel him licking a long strip between your wet folds.
"Fuck! Ashton." You exclaim, grabbing his curls and digging your fingers into his scalp. He winced at the pain, but he definitely enjoyed this.
You grind against his mouth, while his tongue draws circles around your clit. Throwing your head back into the couch, your eyes rolled into the back of your head.
The sensation was almost too much. His eyes never left you, enjoying the sight of you convulsing on the couch. Your pretty moans were like music to his ears.
He licks faster and faster. Groaning inside of you. "I'm getting- I'm getting close." You said in between shallow breaths. He starts sucking on your clit harshly, the sounds were borderline sinful.
You felt a tightness inside your stomach, like a cord waiting to snap. "Don´t stop, please." You mewled.
Your orgasm washes over you, making your whole body shake, clenching your walls around Ashton´s tongue. "Oh my God." You smiled.
Ashton surfaced, his lips were puffy and his mouth was covered in your slick. "Hi." You giggled. "Hi." He repeated, smiling. You covered your face with your hands, and blushed.
"Can I taste you?" You asked. "I-um, fuck yes." He stuttered. "Yeah, you can taste me."
He takes off his shirt and gives it to you. "Here baby, for your knees." You smile and bunch up the soft cotton material on the ground.
You kneel down in front of him, pulling his shorts down and snapping the elastic band of his boxers, finally freeing him. His erection sprang up at you. It was the longest and thickest cock you´ve ever seen.
"See how you make me feel, bunny?" He asked, making you smile. You pumped his shaft a few times to test the waters, making him groan deeply. "Fuck, y/n..." He moaned.
You kitten lick his tip, tasting his salty pre-cum, making Ashton´s whole body shiver.
Sinking down, you took his whole length, gagging. Ashton gently grabbed your hair, holding it to get it out of the way. Bobbing your head up and down, swirling circles around his tip.
"Fu-uck..." He moaned. "You're so perfect." He breathed deeply.
Soon enough, he was moving his hips, increasing his pace while his head was thrown back. "Makin´ me feel so good, sweet girl." He groaned.
He pulled himself out of you, grabbing you by the hair. "I´m not gonna be able to fuck you if we continue this." He chuckled. "Want daddy to fuck you, bunny?" He asked, making you nod. "Please, that's all I want, please." You begged, making him smile darkly.
You both stood up. "C´mere." He said, picking you up bridal style. You were still surprised as to how he could pick you up like you were nothing.
Taking you up a big staircase, you found yourself in a huge master bedroom, complete with another drum set, and vinyls hanging on the walls.
He plopped you down on the bed, a bit more roughly this time.
He looked around, opening a few drawers. "What 's wrong?" You asked. "Shit, I don't have a condom." He muttered. "I'm on the pill." You smiled, making him grin as well. "That's all you needed to say." He replied, taking off his shorts and underwear.
He climbed on top of the bed, hovering over you. "Daddy's gonna make you feel good, sweetheart." He smiled, you watched his eyes darken.
He puts a hand on your throat and pushes his mouth in for a kiss, hard, sloppy, hungry.
"You okay?" He smiles. "Yeah, just please fuck me Ashton." You pleaded. "Atta girl." He responded.
He grabbed your hips and slowly pushed himself inside of you, hissing at the feeling. The initial stretch burned, but slowly but surely you got adjusted to his size.
"Fuck, you´re so tight, bunny." He groaned, starting to pump in and out, guiding your hips, making you arch your back off the mattress, if they could, your eyes could roll into the back of your head.
"Please, faster." You exclaimed. You were lightheaded, becoming cockdrunk, letting out little moans that made Ashton go wild. "Want to ruin you, so nobody but me gets to use this pussy."
"Fuck! Just like that!" You exclaimed, feeling the pulsing wave of pleasure continue to grow inside of you, clenching around his cock. "You're taking me so well baby girl, won't last much longer with you clenching around me like that." He breathed rapidly.
"I'm close, Ashton." You repeated. "Cum for me bunny, let me feel that perfect fucking pussy." Those words were enough to make you cum alone.
You felt a familiar feeling inside your stomach. You felt Ashton´s cock twitch inside of you, meaning he was close as well.
You released yourself, gushing all over his cock, "Mphhhh.." You mewled and he filled you up to the brim with his cum, with a deep groaning sound,almost animalistic. he pulled out of you, letting his cum spill all over the sheets.
"Give me a second." He said, getting up and going to the bathroom, retrieving some wipes to help you clean up, discarding them in a trash can next to his bed.
"Was that okay?" He smiled. "It was perfect, Ashton." You grinned, looking up at him, pulling him into a kiss.
"Jesus, y/n, you´re gonna be the death of me." He curled his lips up into the kiss.
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dangerouslyknown · 2 months
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Hi! Please do headcanons for gojo like you did Higuruma x
Satoru Gojo Headcanons 💎
A/N: Thanks for the request! My JJK obsession is hitting like a truck. I hope I delivered these Gojo headcanons well, mwah
Contents/Warnings: General headcanons, relationship headcanons both SFW & NSFW. Reader/partner is referred as "his S/O" or by they/them so gn!reader
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General Headcanons
He used to play Moviestarplanet. He was sooo popular too. He had lots of friends and he made the silliest movies/artbooks which people loved
He likes to sing and usually he sings whatever is stuck in his head on random occasions, without really trying to sound good
...but oh boy if you ever get the chance to do actual karaoke with him... He sings beautifully when he puts the effort in. What a gorgeous voice, it almost surprises everyone
He goes crazy about Lady Gaga's songs and he loves to do silly little performances whenever he hears any of her songs
Gojo is also a Swiftie???
Somehow I feel like he is TERRIBLE when it comes to spending money. He hasn't had a day in his life where he had to worry about financial stuff, so...
He's the type of guy buy an expensive ice cream machine, then accidentally break it and buy a new one like it's nothing
He used to troll people online as a teen...
Actually, he probably still does it for the heck of it. He isn't one to do anything super offensive, but he enjoys messing with people
SFW Relationship headcanons
He hasn´t been in many relationships in his life, mostly because he rarely lets anyone close. Bro has trust issues :(
He dislikes being vulnerable in front of others, but his S/O is who he shows his true self. It is not something to take lightly
He KNOWS he is attractive and it flatters his ego when he is complimented on it, but if one wants to win his heart, you need to go deeper than that. He wants a person who truly appreciates him beyond looks
His love language is gift giving. He will gift his S/O anything they desire, and it´s his way of showing he cares. He gets excited like a kid in a candy store when he brings his S/O something and waits for them to open the gift
Most of the time it doesn't even have to be anything expensive. Of course he likes to spoil his S/O, but sometimes he just sees something small, which reminds him of them and he decides to buy it
Then, his unofficial love language is being annoying. He would ask "would you still love me if I was a worm" and whatnot
Related to that, he would act all smug and probably provoke arguments with his S/O just to entertain himself (but he's not malicious about it of course!)
When he sees something romantic, he would say "Ewww, sappy romance stuff" and then do exactly those things in private
He likes to show off with his relationship? Y'know, like posting about it in social media and PDA
This also ties to when he holds great pride in the thought that he's able to protect them no matter what. Maybe he's also a bit jealous and likes to show others that his S/O truly is his, and only his
Looooves to dress in matching clothing with his S/O!
Also, if he'd play online games with his S/O, he'd definitely want to do matching usernames (Sometimes it'd be cringe, but that's a part of why he loves doing it)
(NSFW under the cut)
NSFW Relationship headcanons
Leans towards being more kinky tbh
This man likes to have fun, okay? He is super adventurous in the bedroom. He's always coming up with new ideas for his S/O and him to try, and he usually is the one to initiate
He'd love to bring in ropes, blindfolds, toys of all kind and everything you could think of. He wants to use them on his S/O, but isn't against the idea being toys or ropes used on him either blindfolds wouldn't even work on him though
He´s a fan of playing with the dynamics. The vibes he gives is 50% pillow princess and 50% daddy, so there's never a dull moment when he switches up things with his S/O
He lives for teasing in the bedroom. You are not going to get anything easily from his arrogant ass: If he's a sub, he's going to be a brat. If he's a top, you need to beg him
He is capable of being serious during intimate time, but most of the time there's going to be funny and goofy moments
I could 100% see him doing something like slapping his dick against his S/O's face, then grin. At the same time it's hot but it's also hilarious (in his opinion)
Speaking of his cock, I think it's bigger than average. Length is impressive, then girth is more average-ish
Definitely very vocal during sex. He will not shut up whether it's whimpers or dirty talk
I think he loves to fuck his S/O from behind. He loves to kiss the back of their neck, their shoulders and all over their back while going at it
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the-dixon-effect · 11 months
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Daddy Issues
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words: 1.1k
Nobody knew about your past.
Not even a bit. Your presence in Alexandria was regarded by the suburbanites as the disposition of a survivor, someone who had really been shaped by the cruel world outside the gates. Even the members of your own group, your family, didn't dare delve into the rocky landscape that was your life before the fall.
Despite the distinct mystery that followed you wherever you went, some could still sense the trauma you had ensued before. It was in the way you walked, the way you carried yourself, in your defensive impulses and your kind nature. And by 'some', this meant a certain archer who you had taken an interest in since the start.
Daryl Dixon was a man of few words, but since the beginning, you knew there had to be something else underneath his thick skin, a hidden treasure of sorts. And how right you were. You two remained by each other's side at all times, never once leaving the other in fear of losing them. If Daryl had lost you, oh God, he would have lost the one thing keeping him going, the light in his life, the oasis in the vast desert that was this harsh world. You had been so kind to him, and seeing you and your perfect smile was like medicine, and of course, he couldn't help but fall for you. He practically knew everything about you, or at least, he thought he did.
"Ya' alright?" he spoke. The two of you sat side-by-side in the front of a truck, heading out on a run. He had noticed your quietness and how it differed from your usual animated, cheerful manner. He rested both hands on the steering wheel and looked over at you. It had not been long since your father had died, out on a run, not unlike your current mission. Eaten alive by walkers, it was a terrible sight to witness for all involved, especially you, who remained silent for days after.
"I'm fine." Quite the opposite. Such a strange feeling, the man who had abused you your whole life, emotionally and physically, trapped you in the ghetto of Atlanta, and forced you to humiliate yourself to make a living, died at the hands of the new natural world? Did he get what he had coming? Did he deserve it all along? Were you supposed to be grateful, or satisfied? You always imagined that your father's death would feel like a gratifying weight lifted off your shoulders, but for some reason, you were never able to shake the trauma, the anxiety of it all. It was as if the world couldn't let you go, and you were being held hostage in your own dark memories.
Daryl might have been the most observant person you knew. You really thought you'd be able to keep the truth from him and he wouldn't know? Maybe, just maybe, it was time to let it all out. After all, if you were going to confess to anyone, it would have been him.
"I can tell you're not, ya know," he drawled.
"You remember my dad, right?" you spoke, softly and quietly. Even with his eyes fixed on the road, Daryl could sense that you were frowning.
"Ya, I remember tha' prick. Shoulda knocked him out while I had the chance." He also remembered your strong feelings against him, and how he had made a scene in the prison once by ordering you around with a less-than-polite tone. Daryl had obviously stepped in to defend you, which practically began your friendship. You thought of this often, and couldn't help but see Daryl as your protector from then on.
"Well, it's just that- I don't know, it's stupid," you began. "Can't stop thinking 'bout him. The way he died. It just- It seems wrong."
"Shit. I'm sorry, I shouldn't 've said-"
"No, it's okay. He was a horrible man." He was indeed, and though everybody shared your feelings about your father while he was with your old group, not one of them was aware of what he had done to you before the fall.
"There's- there's things I haven't told you. About him, and, about me." Daryl furrowed his brows. Of course he knew there must have been something deeper within your relationship with the man, but he never expected himself to be one whom you would share it with.
"It's alrigh'," he drawled. "Take your time."
"He hit me. All the time. Whenever he was mad or depressed or drunk, or even happy." The words came so easily, and you had underestimated how good it would feel to release some of this pressure build-up, especially to Daryl. Still, you couldn't help but let your eyes glass over as the memories came flooding back. You weren't sure, but despite the horrific things you had endured, it felt right to let it out for once.
He simply stared at you, and even with his brown hair falling over his eyes you could tell he was in shock. How could someone do something like that to you, the most beautiful person, in all ways, that he'd ever met?
"I'm- I'm so sorry Y/N. I never knew 'bout any of it," Daryl was at a loss for words.
"You wanted to know what I did before the world went to shit?" you paused for a moment, understanding that right now, you could not take any of this back.
"I was a- I was-" tears began to stain your cheeks. "I had to- I was a hooker." Silence.
Shit. How could he maintain a friendship with you after that? You were in total disbelief at your confession. Things will never go back to the way they were, you thought.
You sat there, shaking in your seat, forgetting where you were and paying no attention to your surroundings.
It was true, every part of it. You had been a hooker living in the hood of Atlanta before the fall, and you hated it. Every part of it. But there was no escape from the ghetto, and the route you had chosen to survive was safer and steadier than a life of crime. Still, every day you dreamt of a man who could take care of you, love you for your mind and soul, somebody to treat you right. Had you been shaped by the apocalypse, or had you always been like this?
"It's okay. I'm gon' take care of you. Ya don't have to worry 'bout anythin'." Daryl's soft words came like the arrival of the man you had always imagined late at night. You didn't need a man, of course you didn't. But Daryl, maybe you needed him.
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kavehnanginto · 1 year
Text
if you hold me without hurting me (you’ll be the first to ever did)
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pairings: childe, diluc, kaeya, kaveh
synopsis: life was nothing but pain, from the past to the present, it all bleaks of lost dreams and broken records of what life should’ve been. and now that you’re here they wonder if you too is but a temporary moment of happiness that turns into a melancholic memory
tags: depressed boys, again, trust issues abt u, mentions of death, mommy kinda leave kaveh, thats so sad, their parents kinda died, daddy issues, HEAVY CAPITALIZATION ON DADDY ISSUES, lana del rey song mhm, there is some fluff, please trust me
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CHILDE is, for you, the nicest man you have ever met. A gentleman who gave you flowers and showered you with love. But it didn’t matter that he loved you that much, because no matter he will always be in your heart. Maybe in some instances you fought, you apologized, just like any other couple.
But he was not like any other man.
You knew who he was, and the violent nature that he stands for. Although you never saw, you always hear his new target, his new schemes and… with that comes bursts of reassurance of your love, undying love, loyalty to him. The cycle repeats, and even the hundredth time, he will always hug you tight afraid you will go.
And with that you always hug him back.
Some say that such a man was so hard to love, but his lopsided grin, his cute gestures—they had no idea who he was on your view. Maybe it was just facade, or maybe this was the actual him they never saw. But it doesn’t matter. You were his first love, the one who showed him what true and unconditional love is.
And just like his family—he intends to keep your innocence over these matters, and he intends to love you forever.
“It’s okay to let me go… but please say the reason. I’ll give you all of me, all I want is for that to be enough.”
DILUC is a highly respected bachelor in Mondstadt. But to you, he is but a fragile dandelion drifting in the wind. The warmth, the silence and the breeze of the wind were most of the moments you spend with him. He sometimes wondered if this childlike domestic happiness is some fever dream, a sweet lullaby kissing him in the forehead.
Just like the sweet innocence of childhood, the nostalgia was coming back to him. You offered him something more, something deeper and something real than a nostalgic feeling, but never did the maids of Dawn Winery saw Master Diluc running once again at the lake with a smile on his face running to you. Being with you.
You.
With all the years alone, his house simply a tool to help with his daily necessities, you changed it all. You were something to believe in, that he was worth all this joy, that he was worth something. That even with the pain, the deaths, the heartaches he think he rightfully deserves, this one glimmer of happiness the Gods gave him, this beautiful soul that was cursed to love him and he was blessed to love as well.
Without hurt, without pain, someone went into his life and willing to stay.
“The sound of the fire never gives me warmth in winters, perhaps having one more person is why I no longer feel so cold.”
KAEYA never really had a moment in his life that he believed that someone was going to stay. And he too believed that when he first saw you. Even with new memories, even when the years went and go he truly thought that you too will go away. Such preciousness of a pearl was no match for him, rusting and broken. Fixed only to be cut and sold. Used and mended.
Everyone had their own idea of what the Cavalry Captain is really like. A womanizer. An alcoholic. Manipulative. . But Kaeya never minded the roles that society wanted him to play, rather embracing the accusations of his characters. But one thing that seemed to be true in all the gossips around the town is that he hold his secrets pretty well. Too well.
Even too you. You never really wanted to know, there’s this nagging feeling in your mind that he still not trusts you. After all, life can always go backwards but even so your lips will be sealed. That’s a promise you are willing to keep forever.
His eye. His life. He trusts you with his life, he gives you everything you wanted but maybe it wasn’t worth it to answer all of your questions maybe? Maybe he too believed that you too will drift like the wind, just like his past, or maybe it’s him, like a ship sinking in the seas that even with all these things he wants to say, he didn’t want to break that trust and love you had. That love he wants to hold, the person he wants to cherish for a lifetime.
He’ll do anything for you, and his secrets will only harm you even if you know deep down inside that he was harming you too.
“The day you learn the truth, is maybe the day we’ll bid adieu.”
KAVEH was kind, perhaps too much. He treats you so good, even when he doesn’t have enough. That was simply his character, always asking if you’re okay, if you want this or do that. For you, he was simply an angel who fell on earth. A beautiful person who longed to play and create, art and festive.
And perhaps that too was a facade. You find him once crying over a box of toys, and there you cried with him too. It was not important as to why he cried but making him happy, for his joy was one that made the vines grow in the old trees and the one that even rain could never cover. He told you what happened, his past, his “sins” and there you never realized what he was going through.
But that doesn’t mean you can be here for him from now. Kaveh, who blamed everything on himself, could never really grasp how understanding you are. Listening to his words, crying his tears—like that of a little boy finding his peace. That he never found, now as a tall child searching for answers. But still apologizing when he answers. How can he deserve to be loved without hurt. To confess his crimes and be rewarded with a bouquet of flowers.
He longed to be loved, but now he believes that for someone to hold him tight this lonely night, his chest no longer felt so heavy. His heart no longer felt so tight. As now, it is whole for you.
“Sleep tight, and may you rest in a blooming new day, sweetheart.”
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Text
Soulmatch™ — App-grade your love life! (final teaser)
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pairing: huang renjun x reader
au/genre: smut, humor, fluff, angst, strangers to enemies to lovers...?, non-idol!au
characters: huang renjun, f!reader, best friend!Jaemin, best friend!Haechan, friend!chenle, renjun's parents
word count: 23k+ words
general warnings: mentions of cheating, men being dudes and dudes being bros, lack of communication, haechan is a milf hunter, trust issues, insecurities regarding relationships, hook ups, smoking, alcohol, mentions of vomit (nothing graphic or detailed, literally just the word), emotional manipulation..? past na jaemin x reader, implied past huang renjun x wong yukhei / lucas, toxic masculinity, daddy issues, donghyuck and jaemin talk very vulgarly, mentions of virginity, crying, heartbreak, more tba
smut warnings: ...hate sex...?, unprotected sex (nuh-uh!), fingering and oral (f receiving), face-fucking, switch!renjun, switch!reader (?), pet names, a lot of imagining sex, brief choking, more tba
synopsis: Renjun is a hopeless romantic. His goal is to meet his perfect match by the end of the year, maybe even his soulmate. The perfect solution: an experiment for finding love through an app, Soulmatch™. Renjun doesn't care who it is, as long as they're a perfect match, he thinks. But then you show up...
release date: september 10th 2023 (set an alarm, everyone)
a/n: i really love this so much. it's a bit different from what i usually do bc it has a real storyline! it's complicated (not really). i really poured my heart and soul into this. i love renjun so much. argh!
Taglist: @she-is-dreaming @nctzennikki09 @babyjenono @noonaisreading
open here for a sneak peek:
"A what for what?" Donghyuck asks, mouth as full of burger as Renjun's own, hence why he couldn't understand him the first time. Renjun holds up his hand, chews aggressively, then swallows hard.
"An experiment for finding love," he explains a second time, and the crease in between Donghyuck's eyebrows only seems to be getting deeper with every word that leaves Renjun's lips.
"What the fuck is that?" Donghyuck asks (assumingely, Renjun still can't understand him over the huge bite of patty and bun inside of his mouth).
"You give a whole bunch of information about yourself to the scientists, and they use some software to find your ideal partner," Renjun explains briefly. There's a bit more to it than just that, but he doesn't want to overwhelm Donghyuck's brain while he's eating.
"Pff, okay?" Donghyuck says, a few crumbs of- whatever that had been only mere seconds ago flying out of his mouth and directly onto Renjun's forearm. The older contorts his face in utter disgust, shaking the sticky pieces of food off of his skin.
"You're a pig, Donghyuck," Renjun states, wiping the spot with his napkin because he can still feel Donghyuck's saliva on himself.
"I might be a pig, but at least I got game." Donghyuck finally swallows, grinning proudly with a small piece of lettuce stuck in between his teeth which Renjun has yet to decide telling him about after that insult.
"You don't have 'game'," Renjun spits, fingers motioning quotation marks, "you just have low standards. You'd fuck everything that bends over in front of you."
"That is not true!"
"Need I remind you of what happened with Chenle's mom?"
"She is a milf!" Donghyuck whines, letting his hands weakly fall down onto the table.
"Whatever." Renjun sighs. "Point is: I'm not lacking game, I just want to wait for the right person."
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