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#decisions on felicity
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Why I Think They Won't Re-Release Felicity (in any meaningful capacity)
Felicity's stories are very white and protestant in a very alienating way - and I say this as someone who related to her as a child. She's literally a member of the gentry, she's Samantha of the 18th century.
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Fun Fact: In the earliest editions of Meet Felicity, rather than referring to Jiggy Nye's language as "not proper", it's referred to as "sinful". Felicity is also chided with reminding her that disobeying one's parent's is a sin. Oh, and this change:
Nan: "Then Mr. Nye called the horse a nag, and he said the devil could have it. And he said he would skin us alive if we ever came back!”
Nan: "Then Mr. Nye called the horse a nag, and he said anyone could take it if they could ride it. And he said he would skin us alive if we ever came back!”
Her hornbook:
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(and the parentification)
Felicity and Kirsten share a very similar problem in the way they present history, they are literally the mascots for sanitized white people history. There are no black people in Kirsten's stories. Kirsten is literally Manifest Destiny: the Doll.
There's only one free man in Felicity's stories, Issac. Rose and Marcus are slaves. King's Creek is a plantation, a plantation left to Mother and the children when Grandfather dies (he knew they "loved it so.") Felicity is a slaveowner.
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She's not reading Thomas Paine there guys.
I haven't read Felicity's Beforever series. I know they're abridged, and I know they didn't substantially change them. Felicity's relationship with her Grandfather, and his subsequent death, are integral to the series.
How do her central series present her slaveownership? It was ignored as some sort of background consequence of her possession of King's Creek. Like it's just a fact of life, with no need to remark upon it.
okay, and:
Felicity was the worst selling light skinned doll in the collection. Even worse than Kirsten whose sales got cannibalized by Kit after 2000.
I'm not sure if there's a consensus on why Felicity sold so poorly. Red hair, a dainty collection, not girly enough? Her class contemporary, Samantha, is widely agreed to be one of the most popular historical dolls AG released. So it's not class consciousness.
Both don't follow the rules of the time (being a tomboy, befriending people outside her class status):
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Felicity only got a movie because Julia Roberts loved her.
Kirsten: Little House on the Prairie and All American History. This is the time of the Oregon Trail Game, after all. I lived on pioneer stories when I was little (1990s).
Samantha: Romanticized "victorian" era things were popular, and her clothing is pretty 1980s inspired. Look at it.
Molly: The Grandmothers' generation.
Is it Felicity's mob caps? She was the horse girl, and that wasn't enough. Was she frumpy, with her gowns rather than dresses? Her schooling - it's unrelatable. She's learning etiquette with Miss Manderly rather than struggling with Miss Campbell's times tables:
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Her daddy owning a fucking general store and being prominent enough to provoke a reaction with his refusal to sell tea?
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Her Beforever release was out for 2 years, releasing during the 2017 Doll Deluge or whatever we call it. She was gone by 2019. She got a doll, accessories, and undergarments. At least the latter were more period accurate.
you have to keep your trademark active.
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Kirsten's unpopularity prior to archival is easily explained by the release of Kit, the decreasing popularity of pioneer stories, and the changing times.
Felicity was never popular at the outset.
Why?
Felicity's 35th Anniversary Edition was the first to sell out, but that can mean a lot of things. AG doesn't realize sales figures and stock figures. Selling out of 2,500 Felicity is relative to selling out of, say, 10,000 Samantha. Businesses order stock based on projected sales. I'd argue, without the benefit of the full statistical picture, that Felicity collectors are a small and passionate group.
They removed Felicity from catalogs in 2001, making her an online exclusive. Did sixty somethings use the internet at the turn of the century? Mine didn't! She wasn't worth the catalog space a year after American Girl was sold to Mattel. Pleasant was inspired by colonial Williamsburg to create AG. She wasn't enough to gamble a new doll line on. She had to wait until they had some footing. I'd argue Pleasant always knew Felicity would be a poor seller.
When Felicity was removed, I got Kit. She was my next favorite after Felicity and I related to her as a small child, too.
Which reminds me, Kit is responsible for a lot in the AG Historical Collection:
She was another blonde haired blue eyed doll, but with a more relatable collection, and easier to deal with hair:
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Ta dah ^
I think Kit also a soft relaunch of Felicity:
In photos and brief:
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wearing boys' clothing
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close with their fathers
tomboys: with felicity being interested in footraces and racehorses, and kit being a newshound, lacking patience for Ruthie's princess stories (at first).
Kit was like a two-for-one special. I'd really like to see her sales stats compared to Felicity and Kirsten.
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thatsmybook · 5 months
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In season 2, in preparation for the Valentine's Ball, Felice decides not to wear the white wig with her outfit.
She has her natural hair big, and curly and out, and stunning. Also, I love that her dress is a dark colour compared to everyone else's pale coloured outfits.
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She says to her friends about the wig: "I don't know what to do. I can't wear that. It doesn't feel like me." Madison says, "Isn't that the point, though." Stella says," I think it's really pretty." Felice replies with, "It's not that it's not pretty. That's not the problem. It just doesn't feel right. But it's so weird. Everyone else will wear one."
She wants to be herself and sit in her own beauty, but she is worried that she will stand out by not conforming. Parallel this with her dad in season 3 telling her, "When I started (at Hillerska), I tried to have my own style. Some different cool clothes, big unruly hair....But here, that wasn't an option. Soon, I looked like everyone else."
When how you look, your hair, the colour of your skin, makes you different, conforming to the hierarchy that implies that European standards of beauty are superior, is necessary to have an easier time at Hillerska. According to Poppe, "That's how you win. Play be the rules."
I love how this is followed by Felice going against the rules of Hillerska that you don't snitch on the goings-on of the institution, and being honest. Leaving her conforming dad out of the interview room.
I like to contrast Felice's decision at the Valentine's Ball with Wilhelm painting his face and putting on his wig that makes him look like a traditional Prince. In this scene, he is crying as he dons his Prince apparel. It also 'doesn't feel right'. And it also 'doesn't feel like him'. He has always hated his role as Prince. Even something that should be fun, like playing dress up for a ball that everyone is doing, is not. Because he's not playing a role like everyone else. He is that role, and he hates it.
As to the other characters: August is seen to be really pleased with his reflection in the mirror as a traditional noble (read Prince) role. Sara is caught up in the excitement of being one of the elite girls and playing at being a part of their world. Simon is in his school uniform. He is himself. A 16 year old school boy. He definitely stands out at the ball, but he doesn't care.
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grodprinsen · 2 years
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Felice is not amused with you shit talking her during choir practice 🙄✋ also she looked so so pretty during that scene 💕✨
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melien · 1 year
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joeey-dee · 1 year
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What are your other favorite Arrowverse ships if you have any?
Hmmm… good question. 
I guess Canarrow is a given by now, lol. Not going into detail here now why. 
I really liked Roy and Thea, I think they were a good fit and helped each other grow and move out of their comfort zones and the lives they knew and with that changed their outlook on what their lives are going to be like because of the environment they grew up in. Roy learnt that he could be more than a petty thief and that if someone like Thea Queen not only believed in him but actually loved him, other people might give him a chance too and see him for who he is, not the circumstances he grew up in and that shaped him into who he was at the beginning. She gave him a chance and with that pushed him towards believing in himself and that he could be more than what everyone thought and always told him. He didn’t need to be stuck in the situation he was in at the start of the show. 
And Roy in return taught Thea to look beyond a person’s first appearance, to understand what less fortunate circumstances could lead to and the path someone could be pushed into simply by circumstances and desperation. Roy also pushed her to be more than the spoiled trust fund princess that she was or pretended to be at the beginning of the show, he helped her grow up and look passed her own wants and needs. 
They were good for each other and in their case the bad boy from the wrong side of the tracks and the spoiled rich girl actually worked very well, their relationship was very realistically portrayed in my opinion and that made me root for them. 
Moira and Walter were also a couple a got attached to. And I was really sad when they broke them up, even though I completely understand Walter’s reasons and support his choice. Their story was also very relatable and I loved how positive Walter’s presence in the Queen women’s life was portrayed. Stepparents get a bad rep on TV or in movies way too often and that saddens me, because I grew up with at stepdad and he’s the best. I was around the same age as Thea was when my dad died which led to me having a lot more patience and understanding with Thea’s behavior than most of the fandom. I guess I could relate. So, yeah, Moira and Walter have a special place in my heart because Moira got a second chance at love and some happiness after losing her husband and son in such a tragic way. 
I also very much wanted Laurel and Tommy to end up together, those two were so great together and brought out the best in each other. They were a much better fit than Oliver and Laurel in my opinion. They had their issues but I feel they could’ve worked passed those had Tommy lived, Laurel just needed to put Oliver in the past once and for all were romance was concerned. 
I also like Oliver with Helena or McKenna, Sara is my all time favorite but I could’ve easily seen either of those relationships work out in a positive way, once they’d dealt with some issues. McKenna would’ve been very interesting given she was on the Hood Taskforce and her learning her boyfriend was who she’d been hunting for months would’ve made for some great storytelling, plus given her character I could’ve easily seen her becoming Oliver’s inside person at the SCPD. 
Helena was a great character too and I felt her and Oliver’s involvement was very rushed, I would’ve loved for them to stretch it and make her turn on him all the more impactful. They could’ve even brought her back later on reformed and have them fall back into each other and a relationship, and have her become the Arrow’s partner in the field. 
Both Helena and McKenna had a lot of potential that was never really developed and their storylines felt very rushed, unfortunately. 
Lyla and John are also a couple I like, even though they do have some serious issues… but still, I think in they work very well together and they have great chemistry and are a lot of fun.
I think those are the major ones, it is possible I missed some that I enjoyed. I guess Quentin and Donna were pretty great together too and Felicity and Ray had a lot of potential too and would’ve been the better fit than Oliver and Felicity. 
Thank you for your question I hope I answered it to your satisfaction, otherwise just let me know and I elaborate some more, lol. 
I hope you have a great day.
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catradoraism · 2 years
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when edvin said wille was selfish this season and he couldn’t defend his actions i was expecting wille to do a lot worse??? there’s literally nothing he did this season that i wouldn’t call unjustifiable or selfish
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I think that ending is gonna stick with me for a while…
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ace-with--a-mace · 1 year
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felice is so right
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truevedicastrology · 10 months
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Jupiter's Influence on Fortuity
🌟 Jupiter in the 1st House: Your countenance is kissed by luck. A myriad of garments adorns your closet, fulfilling every desire. Your style undergoes constant metamorphosis, exuding unwavering confidence. Jupiter bestows joy upon matters of appearance and vitality, fostering an unyielding individuality. Confidence in physique and actions draws attention effortlessly. An optimistic life view and robust overall health accompany this Jupiter placement, rendering you inherently appealing. Financial luck and life's treasures are within your grasp.
💰 Jupiter in the 2nd House: Felicity in fiscal matters, valuing possessions, and indulging in life's pleasures. A captivating conversationalist with profound life acumen, possessing mental fortitude and intelligence. Financial success graces you early in life, with steadfast values deflecting external influence.
🗣️ Jupiter in the 3rd House: Bliss in relationships with kin, fostering understanding and camaraderie. Fortunate occurrences extend to vehicular matters and swift exam success. Your gift of eloquence ensures articulate expression, resonating positively.
🏡 Jupiter in the 4th House: Familial happiness, affluence, or a deep sense of belonging. A harmonious connection with your mother and favorable living arrangements. Fortuitous circumstances surround your dwelling, possibly leading to residence in a dream locale.
🌈 Jupiter in the 5th House: Swift recognition of talents propels you into the limelight. A proclivity for sports and diverse skills define you. Enjoyable encounters characterize your dates, often with like-minded individuals. Favorable outcomes in gambling showcase high self-esteem and risk-taking proclivity.
🌿 Jupiter in the 6th House: Health and physical well-being favorably influenced by luck. An enjoyable and intriguing routine mirrors fortuitous professional endeavors. Financial abundance often emanates from daily work, with new opportunities arising through colleagues.
💑 Jupiter in the 7th House: Luck with relationships, potentially leading to an ideal partner and grand unions. A predisposition for popularity accompanies this placement, with societal recognition and advice-seeking becoming commonplace. Legal professions may find this position particularly advantageous.
💸 Jupiter in the 8th House: Fortune in inheritance, financial dealings, and a shield from misfortune. Profits through investments are likely, and deeper relationships are blessed with happiness. Resilience in matters of the heart ensures swift recovery from emotional setbacks.
🌍 Jupiter in the 9th House: An overall stroke of luck. Frequent travel, exposure to diverse perspectives, and encounters with life-changing individuals define this fortunate position. Enthusiasm and curiosity for the world's wonders infuse your being, making every adventure invigorating.
🚀 Jupiter in the 10th House: Success in your career, often intertwined with financial support from parents or ancestors. Leadership roles and prominence become synonymous with your professional journey. A penchant for travel and cultural exploration characterizes your pursuits.
🤝 Jupiter in the 11th House: Realization of dreams and steadfast, loyal friendships. Your circle is erudite and multilingual, and influential connections propel your advancement. A recognizable presence in social networks is a natural consequence of this fortuitous placement.
🧘 Jupiter in the 12th House: Luck in adversity and a heightened spiritual inclination. Elevated moral standards and a proclivity for altruism characterize your persona. A solitary contemplative nature intertwines with an acute awareness of life's intricacies, guiding your intuitive decisions. Traveling to desired destinations becomes a personal venture shaped by your instincts.
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marvelfilth · 1 year
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Angel (18+)
Pairing: stripper!Tara Carpenter x f! lawyer!reader
Warnings: no ghostface AU, Tara is 21, R is 27, smut, lap dance, pole dance, alcohol consumption, tipsy driving (pls don't do that), fingering, a bit of degradation and praise
Summary: You need to unwind. Angel gives you more than you could have ever asked for.
Masterlist
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You've had a bad month. Scratch that, you've had the worst month of your career. You've lost one of your loyal clients to a rival and your boss chewed you out over it, and, to top it off, you've lost a case you've been working on for the past four months.
You blink back the exhaustion, leaning back on the railing of your office balcony. You've been nursing your whiskey for the past hour, hoping it'll chase away your gnawing thoughts, but to no avail, you're still deep in your head, rethinking every decision that led you to this.
You check your wrist watch, the platinum glistening in the city lights, and decide to finally head home. You finally relax once you're in your car, putting the key in the ignition and driving off, leaving the day behind. You take a familiar route, driving almost on autopilot and humming along to the song on the radio, fingers drumming on the wheel.
You're almost home when you change your mind and make a sharp turn on the next intersection, heading to a place you haven't been to in months.
Two men in the front greet you with identical nods, holding the door open for you, sensual music spilling into the bustling street. Your eyes zero in on the bar, not paying any attention to the stage and the dancers, happy to see a familiar face handling alcohol tonight.
"Tough day?" Amber asks with a sympathetic smile, placing a full glass in front of you.
"Tough month," you sigh, not in the mood for a conversation.
She offers one more smile before turning to another guest, sensing your desire to be left alone. Her eyes take on a new glint, lips slightly pursed in a cute pout as she talks to a clean shaved man. You scoff in your drink and shake your head, ignoring the glare she sends you.
Leaning back against the bar you settle to simply people watch for some time, maybe get a dance or two from a pretty woman.
"You should ask for Angel," Amber says, wiping the counter. You look at her in question, your glass stopping midway to your mouth. "She's new, but she's good. You could use some unwinding and she's the best at it, trust me."
You nod slowly and ask for a refill before leaving her a tip and walking off to a secluded booth in the back of the club, settling back on the couch and trying to find a new face in the sea of dancers you already know well. Out of the corner of your eye you see Felicity, a fiery redhead with no filter. She effortlessly glides on the dancefloor in her nine inch heels, red lingerie catching eyes of gaping men with pockets full of cash. She bends in a sensual move, her thong granting a perfect view of her round ass. You hum when money starts falling in waves, making the floor disappear. She deserves that and more.
She catches your eye, brow raising suggestively, to which you shake your head no.
"Waiting for someone?" A voice whispers right in your ear, sending shivers down your spine. Your head turns to be met with the eyes of a stranger inches away from your own, lips painted blood red and pulled into a smirk.
You swallow, feeling the swell of her breasts against your arm that's resting on the back of the couch, and shake your head tersely, not trusting your voice just yet. She bites her lower lip and pulls away to slowly walk around the couch, making sure to show off her assets.
Almost all of her body is bare, her lacy push up bra making her breasts look good enough to throw handfuls of cash at her feet. Your gaze is immediately drawn to the full globes, then lowers to a dark red triangle of fabric between her legs held by a thin string. She takes her sweet time in caging you against the leather cushions, draping herself over your lap, hands settling on your shoulders.
You take this opportunity to study her features: the slope of her small nose; the freckles dusted all over her upper cheeks; her dark and inviting eyes, eagerly drinking you up with the same vigor; her full lips, painted red and waiting to be claimed.
She takes your whiskey and sips, expertly masking the distaste behind an alluring smile, but you still catch the way her eyes momentarily squeeze in a fleeting grimace, making you bite back a chuckle.
"I'm Angel. What's your name?" She purrs, hips moving to the beat as she plays with the hair at the nape of your neck. You see some men glare at you with jealousy, their jaws grinding. Angel must be fairly popular to grant a reaction like that.
"Does it matter?" You husk, struggling to keep your hands to yourself.
"Mysterious, huh?" She chuckles, arching against your chest, her barely covered breasts almost spilling out right in your face, hips moving in circles against your crotch. "I like that."
You hum, settling back to watch her flexible body roll against your slowly relaxing one, her lower lip pulled between pearly white teeth.
"There you go," she whispers, sliding her palm down your chest, her other hand tangling in your hair, nails scratching your scalp. It feels so good you almost purr. "Tell me what got you so wound up."
You sigh and take another sip of your drink before answering. "Lost my top client."
She hums, her torso moving in a slow hypnotic circle, before leaning back into you to whisper right in your ear. "Their loss."
She pulls back to look you in the eye, the space between you almost crackling with tension.
"Hey Angel," one of the men that's been glaring at you calls out, waving a couple of twenty dollar bills in the air. "Come give me a dance."
She doesn't even look in his direction, but you silently reach for your wallet, taking out three hundred dollar bills and pushing them under the string of her thong. "Stay."
Her eyes widen and she bites her lip before nodding. She throws her head back, hands leaving your shoulder to slide up her waist to cup her breasts, pushing them together inches away from your face. Your heart hammers in your chest, and you have to grip your thighs to keep yourself from touching her. She rises on her knees and changes the position, her back now to your front, ass snugly against your crotch.
You finish your whiskey in one gulp, your breath hitching. Her wavy hair gets in your face and you breathe in the enticing scent of her perfume mixed with the essence of her. She turns her head, looking at you with half lidded eyes. "You like that?"
"I do," you reply, noting the slight blush rising on her cheeks.
"Want to move somewhere private?" She asks, her eager tone cracking the unbothered facade she's been putting on.
You nod and follow her to the other side of the club, Amber sending you thumbs up from behind the bar before going back to flirting with another drunk man, crisp bills filling her pockets.
You're led to a dark hallway that leads to private rooms, anticipation buzzing under your skin. She nods at the security guard, the man looking you up and down before he lets you through. She locks the door and you wander deeper into the room, taking a seat on the velvety couch.
Sensual music starts spilling from the speakers before she turns sharply, a devilish smirk on her lips. She saunters to the pole, hips swaying in tune with the music, eyes never leaving yours as she hooks her leg over the metal and twirls. She closes her eyes, losing herself in the dance, and grips the pole before bending, back arched, the swell of her ass right in front of your face.
You exhale, nearly biting down on your knuckles from the need to turn her around and fuck her right on the floor. "Angel," you breathe out. She faces you and drops to her knees, legs spread as her hips move up and down, arms over her head as she grips the pole. "Yes?"
You pat your lap and without a moment of hesitation she climbs on top of your thighs, taking off her bra. You bite back a moan when her breasts spill out, pinkish nipples begging for your mouth. She takes hold of your neck, her forehead pressed against yours as she rocks her hips on your lap, her breathing labored. She weaves languidly against your tense torso, her lips brushing against your cheek before she pulls away to settle her hands on your chest, nails scratching your white shirt.
"Fuck," you close your eyes, enjoy the press of lithe body, arousal coursing through your veins. She hums, her center flush against your thigh and you feel her wetness smear on the fabric of your slacks. Your fingers clench uselessly at your sides. "You're enjoying this," you state, searching her face for an answer.
"More than you can imagine," she whispers, grinding down on your thigh with intent. Her nipples brush against your chest and she moans quietly, repeating the motion. You unconsciously thrust up, your pelvis connecting with her heat just as she is rolling down, sending pleasure through her body. She grabs your shoulders and your eyes lock. You thrust again, intentionally this time, your palms planted firmly on the couch to add force. Her hips rock, her needy moans filling your ears.
You can't take your eyes off her.
Fuck that, you think, before planting your hands on her hips, directing her movements, and pulling her into a feverish kiss. Her lips are impossibly soft, and her tongue tastes like whiskey and some fruity cocktail she's probably had earlier. Your hands move from her hips to her breasts, squeezing.
"Yes," she moans, greedily pushing against you. "More, please."
You hesitate only for a moment before lowering your mouth to her nipple, sucking it in with hunger you didn't know you possessed. She bites on her knuckles, hiding a loud moan from the guards behind the door. Your fingers itch with the need to tear off her thong and plunge deep into her soaking pussy, claiming the most vulnerable part of the petite brunette.
"How does that feel?" Your teeth graze against the underside of her breast before you take the other nipple in your mouth, tongue sliding on the hardened nub.
"Like I'm about to come," she whimpers, messily humping on your thigh. "Need you inside," she pleads, taking hold of your hand.
You follow her lead, your fingers easily pushing her thong aside and dipping between her slick folds, strands of wetness clinging to your digits. She buckles against your hand in search of friction, and you teasingly circle her clit, pulling a delicious moan out of her lips. "Like that?" You tease, even though you're as affected as she is.
"Yes- fuck, just like that," she whimpers.
"What about the rules, Angel? You gonna tell your boss about this?"
She shakes her head. "No, I promise. Fuck the rules." She desperately clings to your wrist, pressing your palm against her heat.
It's all you need to finally thrust your fingers inside her cunt. She cries out, biting your shoulder to hide the sound, and starts moving her hips up and down, meeting your fingers halfway.
"Such a bad girl you are, Angel. Riding a stranger like a slut," you grunt, fastening your pace. Filthy sounds fill the room as your fingers keep disappearing in her pussy, bringing her closer to the edge. Suddenly, a misplaced spark of jealousy ignites something deep inside your chest. "Do you do this with everyone, Angel? Do you spread your legs for strangers every night?"
"No," she gasps, tilting your face up and bringing you in for a kiss. "Just you," she moans against your lips, "only you."
The fire inside your chest burns. "Good."
Her walls clench around you, mouth wide open as she moans loudly. You force her mouth shut, pressing your palm against her lips, her eyes widening before they roll to the back of her head. Your thumb slides on her clit in tight circles, fingers curling to touch her sweet spot. She bites down on your knuckles, desperately chasing her orgasm, arousal dripping down her thighs. You add a third finger, stretching her tight pussy, and spread them inside.
"Come for me, Angel," you rasp, pushing deep inside. She cries out, squeezing around your fingers as she comes. She curls into you, hiding her face in the slope of your neck. "Good girl," you praise, kissing her temple, your fingers buried inside her wet heat.
There's a loud knock and a gruff voice sounds from behind the door. "Everything alright, Angel?"
She sits up, eyes wide and alert, and looks at the clock near the door. Your private session ended ten minutes ago.
"I- I have to go," she scurries away, putting on her bra on her way to the door.
"Wait," you call out, catching her wrist before she could touch the handle. "Stay, please."
Her eyes flicker to your lips before she throws herself at you, hands around your waist, kissing you with fervor. You press her against the door, trailing kisses all over her neck, wishing you could leave marks for her to remember you by.
There's another knock and a threat to break down the door. Angel pulls away with one last peck before disappearing behind the door.
The rest of the week goes better after that night. You feel like the burden that's been sitting on your shoulders got smaller, granting you more hours of sleep and allowing you to look your boss in the eye without feeling inferior. You can't help but think back on the girl that so easily brought this change on you. Sometimes when you're caught up in paperwork in the late hours of night you catch yourself wishing you were back in that private room, looking at her instead of some boring corporate nonsense. Your fingers squeeze around the pen with need to touch her again, to unravel her, to savor her taste.
On a Friday night you decide to leave the office early and head to the club, but a phone call stops you in your tracks.
"Hey, hope I'm not interrupting."
You smile, always happy to hear from your friend. "You're not, I'm… heading home early."
"Great. Perfect, actually. I know it's a bit last minute, but I was wondering if you'd like to come over for dinner tonight? I'm making your favorite." Sam asks, and you can hear the sound of pans hitting the stove in the background.
"What's the catch, Carpenter?"
She groans, and you can almost see her slouch against the counter. "I'm not sure if I mentioned it, but Tara is studying to be a lawyer, and I thought maybe you could give her some pointers over dinner?"
You blink, surprised by the question. In two years of your friendship with Sam you've never met her younger sister. Even though they're living together, she's never home when you're over, working double shifts to afford tuition, adamantly refusing Sam's offers to help. She likes to complain about it from time to time, but you can see she's proud of the younger girl.
Angel will be there tomorrow, and you're actually excited to finally meet Tara. It doesn't take long for you to decide which way to go. You make a quick stop at a grocery store on your way there, buying Sam's favorite beer and a bottle of wine, thinking about offering her sister an internship. If she's even half as brilliant as Sam you want her on your team once she graduates.
When you finally knock on the door, expecting to see Sam on the other side, you feel wind get knocked out of you when the woman you've been thinking about since you left the club opens it.
"... Angel?"
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Thoughts?
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yurmomsawh0r · 1 year
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𝐂𝐫𝐚𝐳𝐲 𝐈𝐧 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 - 𝐄. 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐑
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.*•.*• 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 - 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐞𝐱- 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐠𝐨.
𝐃𝐫𝐮𝐠 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐫! 𝐄𝐫𝐞𝐧, 𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐬, 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐜𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫, 𝐄𝐫𝐞𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐝𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫, 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐄𝐫𝐞𝐧, 𝐘𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐬, 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐒𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐞𝐱𝐡𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐦. 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐲 (𝐌𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐝), 𝐔𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝
.*•.*• 𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 - 𝐒𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐚𝐥𝐥!😭
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“Are you all dressed and ready my love?” You called out to your two year old daughter as you grabbed all your things. “Yes mama! I ready.” She giggled as she slipped into her crocs but with each shoe on the wrong foot.
You smiled at her goofiness and bent down to help her with her shoes. “You put them on the wrong feet baby, but I’ll help you.” You smiled up at her. Obsessed with her cute little face. She was the perfect mixture of you and Eren. Her greens eyes resembling his all the way.
You were running late, but it was your fault. You had forgotten to pack her bag last night, resulting in you running around the house trying to get everything together.
Grabbing her hand, you raced out the house but not before locking it behind you.
“I can’t wait to see Vivi today! She said we would make cookies the last time!” Aaliyha spouted happily in her car seat. Making you smile at her. You were happy with how comfortable your daughter was with your friend Felicity. Luckily enough she also had a daughter that was a year older than yours. Her name was Vivica but Aaliyha called her Vivi. “Can you try to save mommy some cookies baby?”
“Otay mama.”
-
After you dropped her off you raced down to your job. It was a new club that had just opened up about a year ago and it was already pretty popular. 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐬 was the name and you worked their as a bartender/server, but recently you’ve been thinking about switching to an aerialist dancer since they a little made more money.
Keeping up with your bills was starting to get a little hard, especially since your daughter was getting older and her expenses were getting more costly by the year.
I wish Eren was here to help me. I probably wouldn’t have to work so hard. Shit, I probably wouldn’t have to do anything if he was here.
But that was just something you’d have to deal with. After all Eren had no idea he even had a daughter to begin with.
Two years ago, when you had found out you were pregnant, you decided to make the biggest decision in your life. Taking a few stacks of his cash you knew he had hidden and disappeared.
Of course you didn’t want to hurt him, but Eren was starting to change into someone you couldn’t recognize and bringing a baby in the mix of who he was becoming scared you.
You see, Eren used to be a sweet boy. Although he was the plug for weed he always had his head on right. That was until he started to deal with heavier drugs. He slowly started to become colder, more detached and distant. . .
I knew he had gone two far when he started to come home late at night when he thought you would be sleeping. Blood being splattered all over him.
Although Eren always kept you away from the dangerous lifestyle he was getting into, you saw what it was turning him into and it was becoming to much for you.
It scared you.
So you left, and haven’t looked back for two whole years.
You did miss him though. He was the best boyfriend you’ve ever had. He was always one to spoil you and tell you how beautiful you are. Always catering to your needs. Listening to your opinions and ambitions.
You loved the way he made you feel. So safe and secure.
You missed being in his arms. The way he kissed your neck on all your sweet spots.
The way his fingers scissored your pussy, leaving you drippin’ wet. You missed the way his dick bruised your walls and rubbed your insides with all his curved 8 inch glory.
No matter how many guys you had fucked after you left him, none of them could get you off like Eren did.
Yes you missed him.
Even now. You could feel yourself getting wetter and wetter by the moment. Your body burning up just from the memories.
“Hey boo, you good?” Jordan, your coworker asked you. Snapping you out of your lustful thoughts.
“Yea girl I’m fine.” You tried to reassure her, but she wasn’t fooled. “You sure? You seem like you got a fever,” she placed a hand on your forehead. “And you feel hot.”
You smacked your lips, and brushed her hand off. “J come on, let’s get this money bitch.”
“Mm, let me guess you was thinking about yo ex again.” Jordan teased you. Placing a hand on her hip as she eyed you. You couldn’t help but crack a smile.
“Yea I was thinking’ bout that nigga.” You couldn’t help from telling the truth. For some reason the past couple of months he’s been on your mind far more often than not.
Putting your small waistline apron on, you got to work.
-
Eren couldn’t believe his eyes. He sat frozen with his hand tightly gripping his glass filled with whisky. He tried to keep his composure as best as he could as to not alert his newest business partner. Eren could feel his heart beating faster and faster in his chest.
He just couldn’t believe it. There you were just across the floor, serving customers. His customers. Who would have thought that after two years, fate would lead you back to him.
“Eren?” Jean called out to him. He glanced in his direction. Jeans eyes subtly moving from the client back to him.
“𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐚𝐲. 𝐖𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.” Eren told the two men in grey suits. Soon, Eren would have his own casino on a remote island. There he would host a black market auction that sold only the rarest of treasures.
The two men in grey suits stood up and offered their hands to shake.
Once Eren saw they were out of the club, his attention immediately went back to where you stood. You looked different, but he knew it was you. He’d never mistake that pretty face for someone else’s.
Your hair was no longer the long length it had been. It was not cut short and styled in finger waves. Your face sported two new nose piercings along with a few new tattoos from what he could see.
He also noticed that you were no longer the skinny bodied female he knew two years ago. Your breast had gotten heavier. No longer the small B cups. Even your hips had spread. The way your mini skirt clung to you let him see just how big your ass had gotten.
Finally - he thought. I’ve fucking found you.
-
That night, Eren had followed you home. You didn’t live that far from the club and that gave him the satisfaction of knowing just how close you were.
The next day, he had a close friend of his bring up a file on you. To say he was shocked to find out that you had a child was an understatement. He was furious.
It was like he was staring right into he own eyes. She looked just like a mixture of the both of you. Already, Eren could tell that she was his.
He couldn’t help but be upset with you. First you leave unannounced and then you have his daughter and didn’t think to tell him anything. He would have taken care of you guys. He would have given you both the world.
So why. Why did you do it? Why did you leave him?
All these questions that would soon be answered when he had you back. And this time he didn’t plan on letting you go.
-
You had just dropped Aaliyha off at day care for a few hours so that you could get some time to yourself today.
It had been a pretty busy week for you and you needed a small break to recuperate and gather your thoughts. Maybe even do a little self care.
You decide you deserved a nice looong hot steamy shower. So you made your way upstairs and stripped out of your leggings and sports bra. Turning the water to hot, and letting it warm up, you went and grabbed your speaker.
Cleo Sol played in the background as you stepped into your shower, washing all your worries away. The hot water loosening all the stiffness in your back.
30 minutes had passed and you finally decided to wash your body. Grabbing your pomegranate scented soap, you scrubbed the dirt and grime from off of you.
You stepped out of the shower and wrapped your fluffy towel around yourself and wiped your feet of any extra water feeling ten times better than you did before. After doing your face routine, you applied pomegranate scented lotion to your body before leaving your bathroom.
You weren’t really paying attention as you made your way to your dresser. Dropping the towel without a care in the world.
“𝐃𝐚𝐦𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐦𝐚, 𝐈’𝐝 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐈’𝐝 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧.”
You halted in your spot. That voice. It couldn’t be. . .
A gasp escaped you as you glanced over your shoulder.
Erens’ piercing green eyes stared right at you. They were menacing. He sat on your bed shirtless, pants unbuttoned with a blunt in his hand already sparked.
“𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭? 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐦𝐞? 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬, 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞.“ He said as he took a hit. You gulped.
You didn’t really know what to say or how to react. Apart of you were happy that he was here. You missed him, but . . . The other part of you was scared. How had he even found you. How had he even got into your apartment!?
Quickly, you fumbled to pick up your towel and wrap it around yourself once you realized you were completely naked in front of him.
This only made him laugh. A smirk playing on his face. This snapped you back into reality. If it was one thing, you hated being laughed at.
“The fuck is so funny Yeager!?” You raised your voice at him. Your face filled with an attitude he missed. Just seeing it made his dick jump.
“𝐎𝐡 �� 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥.” He said as he put the blunt out on your pink comforter before standing. It was like he had grown taller. His body was more muscular than it was the last time you seen him. His hair was tied back in a low bun. Something you always thought was sexy on him.
His knuckles sported new tattoos and even a few lingered on his body as well. He pretty much looked the same but something definitely changed about him.
It was like he was a whole different person, and this person is someone you wouldn’t want to cross.
He took a step towards you. “𝐌𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐮𝐩 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈’𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐧. 𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐈’𝐯𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐬.“
“𝐌𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬.“ He spoke lowly as he took a few more steps.
“𝐌𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲, 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐛𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐞, ���𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐧𝐨 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.“ As he said this, you couldn’t help but feel heartbroken for him.
You knew he was angry, you knew he had every right to be, and you were sorry, but you couldn’t fix the past. You weren’t sure that even if you could, you would want too.
You had to remember, you thought you were doing what was best for her. You stared at Eren from underneath your lashes. A pout sitting in your face as he towered over you.
“𝐌𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲, 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐝𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫.“
Now this made tears well up and fall from you. “I-I’m s-sorry. I d-d, I-I wasn’t trying t-to-“
He only shushed you. Tilting your tear stricken face upward towards him. “𝐖𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐦𝐚. 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐰, 𝐈 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮.” Not a second later, he pressed his lip’s against yours with a sizzling need. He gripped the towel you were holding onto, yanking it away from your body.
The sudden change in your body temperature caused you to flinch at how cold it was suddenly. “Mm!” You cried out when he gripped your short tuffs of hair, pulling your head back so he could stick his tongue deeper down your throat.
His hands wandered down and gripped your ass in his large hands. Another thing you missed about him. “𝐈 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐬𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐦𝐚.“ Eren spoke in between kissing you. He lifted you into his arms and walked you both to your bed, you sucking on his tongue, devouring his mouth with your own.
It had been so long since you’ve felt like this and you were to far gone to have any rational thoughts to stop. He laid you down on the bed before lifting up just to cup your breast.
“𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲𝐯𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡.“ He gripped your nipples, twisting slightly, making your body arch up. “𝐃𝐢𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬 𝐦𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐬?“ You nodded, but squealed when he flicked your nipple.
“𝐔𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲.“
“Yes Eren, I missed you.” You couldn’t help but whine. This made him grin. His finger rubbing slow circles around your clit.
“Oh yesss!”
“𝐇𝐦𝐩𝐡, 𝐈 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲. 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐛𝐲 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐞𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞..” He spoke — slipping two fingers inside you, making a ‘come here’ motion.
Your legs opened wider for him. Your body writhing in pleasure as he took you to a place you haven’t been in a long time.
“Oh fuck! Pleeaassee keep doing that!”
Eren continued his assault on you. Kissing his way down your body until his mouth hovered over your pussy.
“𝐈 𝐛𝐞𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐡𝐮𝐡 𝐦𝐚𝐦𝐚?“
“Yes daddy! Please, I missed this.” Your body was shaking as the orgasm pulsed through you. Erens fingers were now coated in your wet creamy cum.
Erens lips latched on to your clit suckling just the way you liked. Your moans grew louder and louder as he did. His tongue lapping up your juices, making the most embarrassing wet noises ever, but you didn’t care.
All you cared about was how good this man was making you feel.
“Uh, boss? Do you want us to clear everything out, or take only the important stuff?” A big hulking figure asked from the door way causing you to scream.
Eren lifted his head from between your legs slowly. He looked behind him with a menacing look that made the big guy take a step back.
“Sorry boss, I’ll uh- figure it out.” He said before tuning and leaving, only for two more guys to come in and start grabbing things from out of your closet. They paid you both no mind. Just simply grabbing what needed to be grabbed and walking out without a glance your way.
“EREN WHAT THE FUCK!” You yelled. You weren’t so comfortable with men coming in and out of your room while you were naked and being eatin’ out. Eren ignored you though, and lowered his head in between your thighs, licking away like a starved animal.
You tried to hold in your moans as best as you could but another orgasm ripped from you.
“𝐒𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲.“ He taunted.
Once he removed himself from your thighs, he took his own pants off with his boxers following. His cock stood at attention. Dripping pre-nut and sporting thick veins. He was ready for you.
You couldn’t help close your legs slightly. It had been a while since you had sex, and you knew this was going to be a little uncomfortable. I doubt Eren was not going to take it easy on you.
“𝐎𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐞 𝐲/𝐧, 𝐧𝐨𝐰.”
And you did. Slowly but surely you did. “𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭.“ He gripped the back of your knees. Grinding his dick against you a couple of times before he pushed himself inside.
Your hands flew to his abdomen trying to slow down his intrusion but it did little to stop him. He was now fully seethed inside of you. The feeling of being full was so foreign to you but it felt so good.
It felt good to be filled by him again.
“𝐍𝐨𝐰, 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧. 𝐃𝐢𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬 𝐦𝐞?“
He thrusted into you at a fast pace. You gripped his arms tightly as he assaulted your womb. His ball clapped against your ass in a steady repetitive motion that only added to your lust filled heat.
“𝐇𝐮𝐡 𝐦𝐚𝐦𝐚?! 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮?“ He asked you again. This time going faster. “Ah! Yess, yess daddy! I m-mmissed youuuu!”
Your third - or fourth orgasm tore through your body once again. Your slick making it easier for him to go deeper.
“Yesss ‘REN! Just like that daddy!” You could feel him brush against your cervix with every thrust. He groans getting mixed in with our own.
You could tell he was close to nutting. His once hard thrust becoming sloppy but still working your pussy.
“𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭.“ Eren grunted, his nut filling you up with one last thrust. The both of you panting and out of breath.
When he slid from the warmth of your walls, he quickly threw your towel back over you and slipped back into his boxers and jeans, lighting the same blunt he had put out earlier. His men still walking in and out of the room with your things as if nothing ever happened.
“𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲, 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈’𝐦 𝐧𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮.”
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𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞
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100 Asexual Books Rec List
For this list the goal is fiction books with a main character or significant secondary character that is on the Asexual spectrum, or non-fiction books about being Aspec.
Junior Novels
1. Rick by Alex Gino An eleven year old boy starting middle school begins discovering his asexuality admist the school's rainbow spectrum club. Also features transgender and crossdressing side characters, as well as a LGBTQIAP+ supporting cast.
2. Sal & Gabi Break the Universe by Carlos Alberto Pablo Hernandez In order to heal after his mother's death, Sal learned how to meditate. But no one expected him to be able to take it further and 'relax' things into existence. Turns out he can reach into time and space to retrieve things from other universes. Asexual Sal.
3. Hazel's Theory of Evolution by Lisa Jenn Bigelow Hazel knows a lot about the world. But even Hazel doesn't have answers for the questions awaiting her as she enters eighth grade. What if no one at her new school gets her, and she doesn't make any friends? What's going to happen to one of her moms, who's pregnant again after having two miscarriages? Why does everything have to change when life was already perfectly fine? Hazel (main character) is asexual and aromantic (it isn't said in the book, but it is specified in the author's note at the back of the book).
4. The Trouble with Robots by Michelle Mohrweis Evelyn strives for excellence. Allie couldn't care less. Together, these polar opposites must work together if they have any hope of saving their school's robotics program. Allie is asexual and/or aromantic. Junior graphic novel.
5. This is Our Rainbow by Editors Katherine Locke and Nicole Melleby Featuring contributions from Eric Bell, Katherine Locke and A.J. Sass, this first LGBTQA+ anthology for middle-grade readers presents stories of queer fantasy, historical and contemporary stories for every letter of the acronym.
6. Every Bird a Prince by Jenn Reese After she saves the life of a bird prince and becomes their champion, seventh grader Eren Evers must defend a forest kingdom, save her mom, and keep the friendships she holds dear--if she is brave enough to embrace her inner truths. Eren is aromantic (and I'm guessing asexual, though that isn't discussed).
YA Fiction
7. When Villains Rise by Rebecca Schaeffer With her best friend, Kovit's, life in danger, Nita is determined to take down the black market once and for all. Latina asexual and aromantic main character (Nita).
8. The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee Henry "Monty" Montague was bred to be a gentleman. His passions for gambling halls, late nights spent with a bottle of spirits, or waking up in the arms of women or men, have earned the disapproval of his father. His quest for pleasures and vices have led to one last hedonistic hurrah as Monty, his best friend and crush Percy, and Monty's sister Felicity begin a Grand Tour of Europe. When a reckless decision turns their trip abroad into a harrowing manhunt, it calls into question everything Monty knows, including his relationship with the boy he adores. Aro/ace secondary character (prequel to a Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy).
9. The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy by Mackenzi Lee A year after an accidentally whirlwind grand tour with her brother Monty, Felicity Montague has returned to England with two goals in mind—avoid the marriage proposal of a lovestruck suitor from Edinburgh and enroll in medical school. A highly loved book in regards to asexual portrayal, Felicity’s journey does a fantastic job of exploring the struggle of navigating a world where marriage is expected of women in order to function in society. Even more refreshing is Felicity isn’t just avoiding getting married out of a sole rebellion against the patriarchy (though those themes are also present), but simply because she doesn’t have an interest in sexual or romantic relationships at all.
10. Silver in the Mist by Emily Victoria Asexual Devlin has grown up in the shadow of her mother’s impressive spy network—and the shadow of the kingdom, too. A magical mist is eating away at their borders, weakening their magic and making them vulnerable to attacks. Devlin is tasked with infiltrating the royal court of the wealthier neighboring kingdom, but when she befriends their most powerful magic wielder, she discovers an ancient mystery that may hold the key to defeating the mists for good. Victoria prioritizes strong friendships between queer characters and an examination of wealth disparity in this fantasy full of twists and turns.
11. Not Good for Maidens by Tori Bovalino Beneath the streets of York, the goblin market calls to the Wickett women-the family of witches that tends to its victims. For generations, they have defended the old cobblestone streets with their magic. Knowing the dangers, they never entered the market-until May Wickett fell for a goblin girl, accepted her invitation, and became inextricably tied to the world her family tried to protect her from. Told through dual narratives in different timelines, the book essentially has two protagonists: Lou and May. Between these two characters, we have some great queer representation for both asexuality and bisexuality.
12. A Snake Falls to Earth by Darcie Little Badger Themes of magic, family, asexuality, and traditional storytelling dominate in Lipan Apache author Darcie Little Badger's delightful and uplifting second YA novel. A Lipan girl named Nina collides with Oli who is from the land of spirits and monsters. But some people will do anything to keep them apart. This is a wholesome, elegantly written read guaranteed to warm your heart! 
13. Arden Grey by Ray Stoeve Arden Grey is a novel about different kinds of abusive relationships, as well as the strength of family and friendships. Following her parents' separation, Arden is depressed and coming to accept herself as being on the asexual spectrum.
14. It Sounds Like This by Anna Meriano Yasm Trevi didn't have much of a freshman year thanks to Hurricane Humphrey, but she's ready to take sophomore year by storm. That means mastering the marching side of marching band--fast!--so she can outshine her BFF Sofia as top of the flute section, earn first chair, and impress both her future college admission boards and her comfortably unattainable drum major crush Gilberto Reyes. But Yasm steps off on the wrong foot when she reports an anonymous gossip Instagram account harassing new band members and accidentally gets the entire low brass section suspended from extracurriculars. Rep: Biracial Latina fat asexual-questioning cis female MC, Jewish gray-aromantic gray-asexual male side character with ADHD and APD.
15. One for All by Lillie Lainoff In 1655 sixteen-year-old Tania is the daughter of a retired musketeer, but she is afflicted with extreme vertigo and subject to frequent falls; when her father is murdered she finds that he has arranged for her to attend Madame de Treville's newly formed Acadaemie des Mariées in Paris, which, it turns out, is less a school for would-be wives, than a fencing academy for girls--and so Tania begins her training to be a new kind of musketeer, and to get revenge for her father. Rep: disability, asexuality, sapphic side characters, POTS and PTSD.
16. The State of Us by Shaun David Hutchinson When Dean Arnault’s mother decided to run for president, it wasn’t a surprise to anyone, least of all her son. But still that doesn’t mean Dean wants to be part of the public spectacle that is the race for the White House—at least not until he meets Dre. The only problem is that Dre Rosario’s on the opposition; he’s the son of the Democratic nominee. In a moment of solidarity and high emotions, Dean tells Dre that he has been questioning his sexual orientation. He isn’t sure if he’s asexual or demisexual. Dre puts a messaging app on Dean’s phone so they can stay in touch.
17. Scavenge the Stars by Tara Sim When Amaya rescues a mysterious stranger from drowning, she fears her rash actions have earned her a longer sentence on the debtor ship where she’s been held captive for years. Instead, the man she saved offers her unimaginable riches and a new identity, setting Amaya on a perilous course through the coastal city-state of Moray, where old-world opulence and desperate gamblers collide. Amaya wants one thing: revenge against the man who ruined her family and stole the life she once had. Desi, demisexual female protagonist. 
18. Camp by Lev AC Rosen It’s Randy’s fifth year at Camp Outland, a camp where queer teens get a chance to be themselves. Hoping to win over Hudson’s heart—who’s masc and straight passing and only seems to date other guys like himself—Randy has spent the past year reinventing himself: workout regimen, new haircut, new carefully curated wardrobe. His friends and camp counsellor all think it’s a terrible idea, but what can they do but support him anyways?
19. Little Thieves by Margaret Owen Once upon a time, the daughter of death and fortune was a teenage girl and she was the worst. Little Thieves is, as the dedication says, for the gremlin girls, never has there been a more gremlin girl than Vanja Schmidt. A brilliant and brazen swindler, Vanja could give Kaz Brekker a run for his money. But Vanja has bigger fish to fry. As her body rapidly turns into the gemstones she craves, Vanja must put things right and face her greed head on all while juggling her engagement to a terrible margrave, an investigator with his own magic, and the princess whose face she stole. Vanja’s relationship with junior prefect Emeric could not be more demisexual if it tried, with both sides of the romance experiencing asexual spectrum existence in different and complimentary ways. One part Germanic fairytale, one part ensemble heist, Little Thieves is an unhinged romp of a book.
20. Everyone Hates Kelsie Miller by Meredith Ireland Rom-coms and the asexuality spectrum...two great things that go great together. Kelsie and Eric have been competing against each other their whole lives. But desperation forces them to work together. Kelsie’s best friend stopped talking to her and Eric wants to rekindle his relationship with his ex-girlfriend, and since both will be at UPenn at the same time, Eric and Kelsie decide to go on a road trip together. Sparks fly.
21. You Don't Have a Shot by Racquel Marie Valentina "Vale" Castillo-Green's life revolves around soccer. Her friends, her future, and her father's intense expectations are all wrapped up in the beautiful game. But after she incites a fight during playoffs with her long-time rival, Leticia Ortiz, everything she's been working toward seems to disappear. Queer asexual biracial (Colombian, Irish) protagonist.
22. Foul Lady Fortune by Chloe Gong In 1931 Shanghai, two Nationalist spies pose as a married couple to investigate a series of brutal murders causing unrest in the city. Rep: demisexual Chinese protagonist, bisexual Chinese protagonist, bisexual Chinese main character, Chinese trans woman main character, aromantic asexual side character; (Chinese-Kiwi author).
23. The Spy with the Red Ballon by Katherine Locke Siblings Ilse and Wolf hide a deep secret in their blood: with it, they can work magic. And the government just found out. Blackmailed into service during World War II, Ilse lends her magic to America’s newest weapon, the atom bomb, while Wolf goes behind enemy lines to sabotage Germany’s nuclear program. It’s a dangerous mission, but if Hitler were to create the bomb first, the results would be catastrophic. Gay demisexual Jewish protagonist.
24. Beneath the Citadel by Destiny Soria Cassa, the orphaned daughter of rebels, and friends Alys, Evander, and Newt, fight back against the high council of Eldra, which has ruled for centuries based solely on ancient prophesies. Alys, an apothecary-in-training and the level-headed one of the crew. She identifies as asexual.
25. Eliza and Her Monsters by Francesca Zappia Eighteen-year-old Eliza Mirk is the anonymous creator of the wildly popular webcomic Monstrous Sea, but when a new boy at school tempts her to live a life offline, everything she's worked for begins to crumble. Asexual main character, not explicitly stated in the book.
26. Technically, You Started It by Lana Wood Johnson When a guy named Martin Nathaniel Munroe II texts you, it should be obvious who you're talking to. Except there's two of them (it's a long story), and Haley thinks she's talking to the one she doesn't hate. Demisexual main character.
27. Now Entering Addamsville by Francesca Zappia Zora Novak is framed for a crime she didn't commit--in a town obsessed with ghosts, will she be able to find the culprit and clear her name before it's too late? It's a brief mention, but Zora is ace.
28. Fully Disclosure by Camryn Garrett In a community that isn’t always understanding, an HIV-positive teen must navigate fear, disclosure, and radical self-acceptance when she falls in love–and lust–for the first time. One of Simone’s best friends in the book, Claudia, is an asexual lesbian. The unwavering support she gives to Simone is heartwarming, and she is also openly sex-positive—which flips the script on its head regarding what most people would assume of asexual people.
30. The Art of Saving the World by Corinne Duyvis When Hazel Stanczak was born, an interdimensional rift tore open near her family’s home, which prompted immediate government attention. They soon learned that if Hazel strayed too far, the rift would become volatile and fling things from other dimensions onto their front lawn—or it could swallow up their whole town. Hazel Stanczak identifies as asexual, though she spends time in the book questioning it. The book presents a unique way to show that there is not one single way to be asexual—that it exists on a spectrum and can look different for each person.
31. Let's Talk About Love by Claire Kann Alice had her whole summer planned. Non-stop all-you-can-eat buffets while marathoning her favorite TV shows (best friends totally included) with the smallest dash of adulting–working at the library to pay her share of the rent. The only thing missing from her perfect plan? Her girlfriend (who ended things when Alice confessed she’s asexual). Alice is done with dating–no thank you, do not pass go, stick a fork in her, done. Alice is a biromantic and asexual black woman who starts off very confident in her identity as asexual, yet has experiences that have her questioning her orientation and how to talk about it.
32. In the Ravenous Dark by AdriAnne Strickland A pansexual blood mage reluctantly teams up with an undead spirit to start a rebellion among the living and the dead. This book features Japha, an asexual nonbinary character who serves as the best friend to the MC.
33. Seven Ways We Lie by Riley Redgate Life at Paloma High School is much like any other high school, with petty drama, judgmental assholes, and mind-numbing schoolwork. Until it isn’t. A scandal emerges: a student and teacher had an illicit affair. At the center of the scandal are seven teenagers, each with their own secrets, whose lives are transformed as a result of this scandal. One of the characters can be read as asexual (and possibly neurodiverse). He never explicitly labels himself as such, but the way he describes his experiences of [non-]attraction strongly point to him being on the ace spectrum.
34. Quicksilver by R. J. Anderson Tori thought she had left her past behind when she and her family started a new life in a new city. But then Sebastian Faraday reappears in her life to tell her that she’s not quite as safe as she thinks: the relay is still operating and a genetics lab is trying to track her down to figure out the secret behind her unusual biology. Tori is going to have to use all of her considerable technical expertise to escape her past and live the normal human life she’s always wanted to have. Asexual main character.
35. Hullmetal Girls by Emily Skrutskie Aisha Un-Haad, seventeen, and Key Tanaka, eighteen, have risked everything for new lives as mechanically enhanced soldiers, and when an insurrection forces dark secrets to surface, the fate of humanity is in their hands. In Hullmetal Girls, Aisha is not only ace/aro but she is also happy with her identity. Crucially, so is everyone else.
36. Not Even Bones by Rebecca Schaeffer Nita's mother hunts monsters and, after Nita dissects and packages them, sells them online, but when Nita follows her conscience to help a live monster escape, she is sold on the black market in his place. Aro/Ace main character
37. Before I Let Go by Marieke Nijkamp When Corey moves away from Lost Creek, Alaska, she makes her friend Kyra promise to stay strong during the long, dark winter, and wait for her return. Just days before Corey is to return home to visit, Kyra dies. The entire Lost community speaks in hushed tones, saying her death was meant to be. And they push Corey away like she's a stranger. With every hour, Corey's suspicion grows. Lost is keeping secrets-- but piecing together the truth about what happened to her best friend may prove as difficult as lighting the sky in an Alaskan winter. Aro/Ace main character.
38. If It Makes You Happy by Claire Kann Winnie is living her best fat girl life and is on her way to the best place on earth. No, not Disneyland–her Granny’s diner, Goldeen’s, in the small town of Misty Haven. While there, she works in her fabulous 50’s inspired uniform, twirling around the diner floor and earning an obscene amount of tips. With her family and ungirlfriend at her side, she has everything she needs for one last perfect summer before starting college in the fall. …until she becomes Misty Haven’s Summer Queen in a highly anticipated matchmaking tradition that she wants absolutely nothing to do with. Aro/ace secondary character.
39. Dread Nation by Justina Ireland An alternate history where the Civil War was put on hold when zombies started to rise. Almost finished with her education at Miss Preston's School of Combat in Baltimore, Jane is set on returning to her Kentucky home and doesn't pay much mind to the politics of the eastern cities, with their talk of returning America to the glory of its days before the dead rose.But when families around Baltimore County begin to go missing, Jane is caught in the middle of a conspiracy, one that finds her in a desperate fight for her life against some powerful enemies. And the restless dead, it would seem, are the least of her problems. The word asexual is not used, but that fits with the setting, and the explanation goes into a fair amount of detail, also ruling out that she likes women instead.
40. Vespertine by Margaret Rogerson When her convent is attacked by possessed soldiers, Artemisia defends the Gray Sisters by awakening the revenant bound to a saint's relic, even though she runs the risk of being possessed permanently by the powerful ancient spirit. Non-explicit romantic asexual main character. Fantasy.
41. Archivist Wasp by Nicole Kornher-Stace A postapocalyptic ghosthunter escapes her dire fate by joining the ghost of a supersoldier on his quest to the underworld Aromantic asexual main character. Dark fantasy/dystopian.
42. Summer of Salt by Katrina Leno While anyone would love to have a bit of magic, what happens when magic turns dark? Georgina Fernweh will come into her magic someday soon. Before she does, Georgina faces a tragedy that tests the islanders' trust. In this book, Georgina’s best friend Vira is aroace, and it’s addressed somewhat in the story at different points. There is a sweet strength between Georgina and Vira, full of loyalty and support that is lovely to see.
43. The Summer of Bitter and Sweet by Jen Ferguson In this moving and complex narrative, Lou learns to draw boundaries, stand up for herself, all while coming to terms with her demisexuality.
44. The Sound of Stars by Alechia Dow One-third of the human population has died and now the world is about to end. Ellie, a fat, Black, disabled, demisexual girl with access to an illegal library teams up with a music-loving alien to risk their lives to save the world.
45. The Grimrose Girls by Laura Pohl Pohl serves up a veritable smorgasbord of queer fairytale goodies in Grimrose Girls. This tale as old as time follows four students at the prestigious boarding school Grimrose Academy—Ella, Yuki, Rory, and newcomer Nani. When the former three’s best friend dies, all four girls are swept up in a dark and twisted mystery full of old fairytale magic. They must work together to unravel the secrets between them and break an ancient curse that dooms them to a fairytale ending (and not the fun kind). Yuki’s aromantic asexual identity is explored in her relationship to expectations, beauty, and friendship throughout the novel.
46. Radio Silence by Alice Oseman Frances has been a study machine with one goal. Nothing will stand in her way; not friends, not a guilty secret – not even the person she is on the inside. Then Frances meets Aled, and for the first time, she’s unafraid to be herself. So when the fragile trust between them is broken, Frances is caught between who she was and who she longs to be. In this book, Aled identifies as demisexual while Frances identifies as bisexual. The story really pays homage to the importance of friendship, and romantic storylines move to the background in a way we don’t often get in YA literature.
47. This Golden Flame by Emily Victoria Forced to serve her country’s ruling group, Karis wants nothing more than to find her brother. But family bonds don’t matter to the sole focus of unlocking the magic of an ancient automaton army. Karis is ace and other LGBTQ+ characters are introduced throughout.
48. Sawkill Girls by Claire Legrand A horror novel centered around three girls facing off against an unseen monster that preys upon the young women of the island of Sawkill Rock. Features a black asexual girl fresh out of a romantic relationship, as well as a f/f relationship.
49. Love Letters for Joy by Melissa See Less than a year away from graduation, seventeen-year-old Joy is too busy overachieving to be worried about relationships. She’s determined to be Caldwell Prep’s first disabled valedictorian. And she only has one person to beat, her academic rival Nathaniel. But it’s senior year and everyone seems to be obsessed with pairing up. One of her best friends may be developing feelings for her and the other uses Caldwell’s anonymous love-letter writer to snag the girl of her dreams. Joy starts to wonder if she has missed out on a quintessential high school experience. She is asexual, but that’s no reason she can’t experience first love, right?
50. Not Your Backup by C. B. Lee Part 3 in the Sidekick Squad series by C.B. Lee. Follows a questioning aromantic asexual latinx superhero sidekick fighting to prove her worth on the team despite her lack of superpowers, all admist the team's battle against the corrupt League of Heroes.
51. Belle Révolte by Linsey Miller Noble-born Emilie des Marais, 16, wants to become a physician, a role usually forbidden women of her class because of the corruptive toll the magical "noonday arts" exact. Common-born Annette Boucher wants to escape her domineering parents and master the less physically costly "midnight arts" of illusions, divination, and scrying, normally reserved for those who can afford the expensive education. At Emilie's urging, each girl takes the other's place. Miller (Ruin of Stars) writes in lush, dense prose that can require a careful read, but her protagonists' awareness of privilege and desire to challenge the status quo shines through. LGBTQ representation--including gay, trans, and nonbinary characters (Annette identifies as asexual biromantic)--further widens this tale's appeal.
52. Tarnished Are the Stars by Rosiee Thor A secret beats inside Anna Thatcher's chest: an illegal clockwork heart. Anna works cog by cog -- donning the moniker Technician -- to supply black market medical technology to the sick and injured, against the Commissioner's tyrannical laws. Determined to earn his father's respect, Nathaniel sets out to capture the Technician. But the more he learns about the outlaw, the more he questions whether his father's elusive affection is worth chasing at all. This YA novel features an aroace character gradually coming to accept his orientation in the midst of everything else that is happening in his life. Perfect for older teens who also enjoy WLW representation and dark themes.
53. Aces Wild: A Heist by Amanda DeWitt An all-asexual online friend group attempts to break into a high-stakes gambling club and commit a heist together. Includes a male asexual character navigating what love looks like for him, an aromantic asexual Latinx gender-nonconforming boy, a Vietnamese American and German asexual nonbinary teen, and a black asexual girl.
54. Planning Perfect by Haley Neil Summer vacation quickly becomes complicated for Felicity Becker as she tries to plan a perfect wedding for her mom, figure out her feelings for her friend Nancy, and wonder what dating will look like for her as an asexual person.
55. Ace of Hearts by Myriad Augustine Everyone around Alvin seems to be obsessed with one thing-- sex. Alvin finds it uncomfortable to think and talk about it and he knows he isn't ready and may never be. His friends, however, think that all Alvin needs is to hook up with the right guy. But the closer Alvin gets to being physical with someone, the more he's uncertain that this is for him and he begins to wonder if he's asexual. Can Alvin find the love that's right for him?
56. Beyond the Black Door by AdriAnne Strickland Everyone has a soul. Some are beautiful gardens, others are frightening dungeons. Kamia comes to know more about her identity as she decides to battle the forces of evil, no matter the cost... Asexual and demi-romantic main characters. Dark fantasy. Kamai is asexual, but isn’t aromantic—she has an interest in relationships that isn’t always depicted for those who are ace.
57. Loveless by Alice Oseman A queer coming of age story featuring a romance obsessed aromantic asexual main character discovering her sexuality and coming to terms with what that means, and a variety of other queer characters that support her on her journey.
58. Summer Bird Blue by Akemi Dawn Bowman Rumi Seto spends a lot of time worrying she doesn’t have the answers to everything. What to eat, where to go, whom to love. But there is one thing she is absolutely sure of—she wants to spend the rest of her life writing music with her younger sister, Lea. Then Lea dies in a car accident, and her mother sends her away to live with her aunt in Hawaii while she deals with her own grief. While not the main focal point of the book, Rumi does grapple throughout the story about where exactly she lands on the ace and aro spectrum—and whether she has to label herself at all.
59. Meet Cute Diary by Emery Lee In this queer rom-com, a transgender teen must decide if he's dedicated to romantic formulas or open to unpredictable love after an internet troll attack on his blog compels him and a fan to start fake-dating. Through an unlikely friendship with sweet, grounded Devin, who is Cuban American, asexual, and experimenting with pronouns, Noah--initially self-centered and standoffish--learns to value communication and empathy.
60. The Reckless Kind by Carly Heath In 1904 Norway, Asta runs away from her horrible fiancé to live with her two best friends. The three misfits set out to win the annual Christmas sleigh race to prove that they belong together. Queer asexual hard of hearing protagonist with heterochromia of Norwegian descent.
61. Forward March by Skye Quinlan How can band geek Harper have the chance of becoming the First Daughter with a fake dating profile? However, Harper does know that the drumline leader swiped right. Come along with Harper as she explores her truth during her last year of high school. Asexual-questioning cis female MC with anxiety and asthma.
62. Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger What if America had monsters, magic, and interdimensional beings? For Elatsoe, this is real, and she has to uncover her cousin's murder! She can do this with the help of her ghost dog, Kirby, but has to remember not to wake human ghosts. Aromantic ace main character. Paranormal mystery. Casual representation which extends to Ellie’s identity as Lipan Apache. This identity is asserted more often and firmly than her asexuality, and Little Badger drops in nuggets of education for us settlers about what Indigenous people, and the Lipan Apache in particular, suffered at the hands of settlers.
63. All Out: The No-Longer-Secret Stories of Queer Teens Throughout the Ages by Editor Robin Talley A collection of short fantasy stories, featuring a variety of queer characters across multiple sexualities and genders. Features an asexual roller-skating girl from the 70s struggling to explain her identity to her crush.
64. Black Wings Beating by Alex London Twins Brysen and Kylee live in a world that revers the power of the falconers, but in a world where war approaches, they aren’t safe. Hunted for their power, they work together to trap the Ghost Eagle. Kylee is an ace character, focused on protecting her brother.
Graphic Novels
65. A-okay by Jarad Greene Eight grade can be tough, especially if you have acne and bullies, and lose friends. But our relatable asexual and aromantic protagonist, Jay, pulls through. This is a relatable memoir with colorful artwork.
66. How to Be Ace: A Memoir of Growing up Asexual by Rebecca Burgess A comic memoir detailing the author Rebecca Burgess's experience with growing up asexual in a world obsessed with sex. Also talks about her experiences with her own mental health and OCD.
67. Jughead, Volume 1 by Chip Zdarsky A comic book reboot of the Archie comics centered around Jughead Jones. Follows an aromantic asexual main character in typical Archie-style shenanigans. Part 1 of a 3 part series.
68. A Quick & Easy Guide to Asexuality by Molly Muldoon A charming introduction to asexuality, created to shed light on the misconceptions surrounding sex and being asexual. Told by writer Molly Muldoon and cartoonist Will Hernandez, both on the asexual spectrum.
69. Is Love the Answer? by Isaki Uta A poignant coming-of-age story about a young woman coming into her own as she discovers her identity as aromantic asexual. A complete story in a single volume, from the creator of "Mine-kun is Asexual."
Domestic Fiction
70. Have You Seen Luis Velez by Catherine Ryan Hyde Raymond Jaffe feels like he doesn't belong. Not with his mother's new family. Not as a weekend guest with his father and his father's wife. Not at school, where he's an outcast. After his best friend moves away, Raymond has only two real connections: to the feral cat he's tamed and to a blind ninety-two-year-old woman in his building who's introduced herself with a curious question: Have you seen Luis Velez? Mildred Gutermann, a German Jew who narrowly escaped the Holocaust, has been alone since her caretaker disappeared. She turns to Raymond for help, and as he tries to track Luis down, a deep and unexpected friendship blossoms between the two. Raymond is asexual (to be precise, he is aroace) And he is depicted as kind, loving, sensitive and realistic.
Fantasy
71. In the Lives of the Puppets by TJ Klune In a strange little home built into the branches of a grove of trees, live three robots--fatherly inventor android Giovanni Lawson, a pleasantly sadistic nurse machine, and a small vacuum desperate for love and attention. Victor Lawson, a human, lives there too. They're a family, hidden and safe. Protagonist: Vic, A curious, loving, & asexual human.
72. The Bone Season by Samantha Shannon In the mid-21st century major world cities are controlled by a formidable security force and clairvoyant underworld cell member Paige commits acts of psychic treason before being captured by an otherworldly race that would make her a part of their supernatural army. Demisexual main character.
73. The Perfect Assassin by K.A. Doore Divine justice is written in blood. Or so Amastan has been taught. As a new assassin in the Basbowen family, he's already having second thoughts about taking a life. A scarcity of contracts ends up being just what he needs. Until, unexpectedly, Amastan finds the body of a very important drum chief. Until, inevitably, Amastan is ordered to solve these murders, before the family gets blamed. Amastan is asexual and, as it turns out, homoromantic.
74. The Bruising of Quilwa by Naseem Jamnia Firuz-e Jafari was able to escape the slaughter of traditional blood magic practitioners by immigrating to the city-state of Qilwa. But now a terrible disease is spreading through the city, and Firuz believes it comes from ineptly performed blood magic. Now they must find a way to break a cycle of prejudice in order to survive. From the author: it's about an aroace nonbinary refugee healer who is trying to cure a magical plague in their new home while hiding their blood magic.
75. The Midnight Bargain by C. L. Polk The Midnight Bargain is a story "set in a world reminiscent of Regency England, where women's magic is taken from them when they marry. A sorceress must balance her desire to become the first great female magician against her duty to her family. Ysbeta has a clear goal for her life: to discover and share magic. Besides loving learning for its own sake, Ysbeta is asexual, and wealthy in her own right, so the bargaining season offers her literally nothing.
76. Every Heart A Doorway by Seanan McGuire Set in a world where a group of children have the ability to find and enter doorways into magical worlds, and now must find who's targetting them for this ability. Lead by an female asexual main character, with a trans love interest. First book in a series of novellas.
Science Fiction
77. The First Sister by Linden A. Lewis She's a priestess of the Sisterhood, traveling the stars alongside the soldiers of Earth who own the rights to her body and soul. When her former captain abandons her, First Sister's hopes for freedom are dashed and she is forced to stay on her ship with no friends, no status, and a new captain she knows nothing about. When the Mother, leader of her order, asks her to spy on Captain Saito Ren, First Sister discovers that sacrificing for the war effort is so much harder to do when your loyalties are split. He climbed his way out of the slums to become an elite soldier of Venus, but now he's haunted by his failures and the loss of his partner Hiro. But when Lito learns that Hiro is alive, but a traitor, and he's assigned to hunt Hiro down, and kill them, Lito must decide what he is actually fighting for - the society that raised him, or himself. As the battle to control Ceres reaches a head, Lito and First Sister must decide what - and whom - they are willing to sacrifice in the name of duty, or for love. Hispanic panromantic asexual protagonist (Lito).
78. Firebreak by Nicole Kornher-Stace Mal is one of many war survivors in the old town working multiple jobs to scrimp by, one of which is her team's streaming video game play. The team lives with several other roommates in a converted hotel room run by Stellaxis, the company that owns half of town, and is the only legal provider of drinkable water. When Mal catches sight of an elusive SecOps character, special non-player characters (NPCs) modeled after Stellaxis' twelve bioengineered operatives, the team pursues her inside the game to catch her on video for two seconds before their power curfew kicks in. By the time Mal heads down for her daily ration of water, they've secured a lucrative contract, involving an in-person meeting and a conspiracy theory, paying them to capture images of the three living SecOps characters. When Mal returns to find out why the next payment failed, she becomes involved in a fracas that will endanger everyone she knows. Aroace main character.
79. To be Taught, If Fortunate by Becky Chambers Four astronauts set out to explore the galaxy. This journey spans centuries and many worlds. A thought provoking read that explores the themes of loneliness and sense of purpose. Excellent cast of diverse characters and vivid world building. Chikondi is asexual and the text is careful to note that his relationship to the protagonist is no less emotional or vital than those she shares with people she is sexually involved with.
80. The Circus Infinite by Khan Wong What better person to take down a crime boss than a mixed-species fugitive! Join Jes on this exciting tale of espionage, torture, demolition. Sex-averse panromantic asexual lead character
Historical Fiction
81. Kaikeyi by Vasihnavi Patel The only daughter of the kingdom of Kekaya, she is raised on grand stories about the might and benevolence of the gods. Yet she watches as her father unceremoniously banishes her mother, her own worth measured by how great a marriage alliance she can secure. And when she calls upon the gods for help, they never seem to hear. Desperate for some measure of independence, she turns to the ancient texts she once read with her mother and discovers a magic that is hers alone. Kaikeyi is asexual and aromantic. Although the words "asexual" and "aromantic" aren't used in the book.
Western
82. The Complete Lady Ruth Constance Chapelstone Chronicles by L. C. Mawson If you’re looking for steampunk magic, the Lady Ruth Constance Chapelstone novellas are the place for you. Read them individually or all together in this compendium. Chapelstone is interested in her inventions, not love and romance.
Paranormal
83. The Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives in Your Homes by Joseph Fink Told in a series of eerie flashbacks, the story of The Faceless Old Woman goes back centuries to reveal an initially blissful and then tragic childhood on a Mediterranean Estate in the early nineteenth century, her rise in the criminal underworld of Europe, a nautical adventure with a mysterious organization of smugglers, her plot for revenge on the ones who betrayed her, and ultimately her death and its aftermath, as her spirit travels the world for decades until settling in modern-day Night Vale. Asexual secondary character.
Romance  
84. All the Wrong Places by Ann Gallagher After his three ex-girlfriends in a row leave Brennan because he's not fulfilling their sexual needs, he seeks out advice from Zafir, the owner of a sex shop. Zafir introduces Brennan to the concept of asexuality and slowly something more blossoms between them.
85. That Kind of Guy by Talia Hibbert Rae needs a fake date to take to her ex's wedding and convinces Zach, a close friend who has recently discovered that he is demisexual, to play along.
86. The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood In an attempt to convince her best friend that she really is over her ex-boyfriend, grad-student Olive panic kisses stern associate professor Adam in the hallway. (Olive is coded as demisexual/graysexual, but that label is never used in the book).
87. Far From Home by Lorelie Brown The oddest of odd couples finds unexpected joy in Brown’s warm, sweet contemporary romance. American citizen Rachel, a not-quite-asexual assistant film producer struggling to make a living in L.A., is drowning in student debt; Indian immigrant Pari Sadashiv, a lesbian logistics manager, needs a U.S. green card to advance her career. When Rachel offers to marry Pari in exchange for funds, it’s just party banter at first—but what’s to stop them from crafting a friendship with legal and financial benefits? Their platonic plans quickly go awry as Pari’s mother moves in to help plan the wedding, forcing them to live their lie. As Rachel feels herself awakening to an attraction she didn’t even know was possible, Pari has to decide whether she can live with the possible fallout of Rachel’s tentative first foray into same-sex love.
88. Kiss Her Once for Me by Alison Cochrun Last Christmas, Ellie met Jack in Powell’s when they both went for a copy of Alison Bechdel’s Fun Home, and over a cute argument over “shared custody”, and Jack poking gentle fun at Ellie (who had been crying alone and talking to a footstool as if it were her friend) they start to bond. Jack asks Ellie for coffee, and then they end up spending the whole day together. This is a big deal for Ellie, who is demisexual, and rarely develops attractions to anyone. And then Jack breaks her heart. Fast-forward to this Christmas when Andrew, the landlord who owns the building she works in, asks her to fake-marry him so he can access his inheritance, and shenanigans lead to her agreeing to this and to going home with him for Christmas, and surprise! Jack is Andrew’s sister.
89. The Charm Offensive by Alison Cochrun Tech wunderkind Charlie has never really been interested in dating, but agrees to join the cast of reality show 'Ever After.' While there he finds himself charmed by his producer, Dev, and questioning his sexuality. The Charm Offensive includes a conversation discussing asexuality and its spectrum.
90. Never Been Kissed by Timothy Janovsky Wren Roland has never been kissed, but he wants that movie-perfect ending more than anything. Thanks to Mateo’s boyfriend, he learns about demisexuality and realizes that when he came out as gay, he had not finished realizing truths about himself and intimate relationships.
91. How to be a Normal Person by TJ Klune Before The House on the Cerulean Sea blew up, Klune wrote this quirky and delightful story of two asexual people finding each other and their happily ever after.
92. Soft on Soft by Mina Waheed This super sweet, low-angst romance centers on two fat, queer women of colour (one Black and one Persian-Arab) who fall in love and find their happy ending with hardly any drama. There’s also anxiety representation. It’s just pure fluffy romance goodness. Demisexual protagonist.
Non-Fiction
93. Ace and Aro Journeys: A Guide to Embracing your Asexual or Aromantic Identity by The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project What does it mean to be ace or aro? How should I approach the challenges that come with being ace or aro? How can I best support the ace and aro people in my life? Join the The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project (TAAAP) for a deep dive into the process of discovering and embracing your ace and aro identities. Empower yourself to explore the nuances of your identity, find and develop support networks, explore different kinds of partnership, come out to your communities and find real joy within. Combining a rigorous exploration of identity and sexuality models with hundreds of candid and poignant testimonials -- this companion vouches for your personal truth, wherever you lie on the aspec spectrum. You are not invisible! You are among friends.
94. Being Ace: An Anthology of Queer, Trans, Femme, and Disabled Stories of Asexual Love and Connection by Editor Madeline Dyer Discover the infinite realms of asexual love across sci-fi, fantasy, and contemporary stories From a wheelchair user racing to save her kidnapped girlfriend and a little mermaid who loves her sisters more than suitors, to a slayer whose virgin blood keeps attracting monsters, the stories of this anthology are anything but conventional. Whether adventuring through space, outsmarting a vengeful water spirit, or surviving haunted cemeteries, no two aces are the same in these 14 unique works that highlight asexual romance, aromantic love, and identities across the asexual spectrum
95. Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex by Angela Chen A non-fiction research book about the asexual perspective on society's facinations with love and sex, and the misconceptions about what being asexual really is and what it means to a person.
96. The Invisible Orientation: an Introduction to Asexuality by Julia Sondra Decker An introduction to what asexuality is, both for people who don't know what that means and for people that may be questioning their own sexuality. It aims to puts asexual people's experiences in context, as they move through a very sexualized world.
97. Gender Queer: A Memoir by Maia Kobabe A graphic memoir about author Kobabe's growing from adolescence to adulthood, as e explores eir gender identity and sexuality. Features a gender queer and asexual main character that uses e/eir pronouns.
98. Ace Voices What it Means to Be Asexual, Aromantic, Demi or Grey-Ace by Eris Young This is the ace community in their own words. Drawing upon interviews with a wide range of people across the asexual spectrum, Eris Young is here to take you on an empowering, enriching journey through the rich multitudes of asexual life.
99. I Am Ace: Adice on Living Your Best Asexual Life by Cody Daigle-Orians Tackling everything from what asexuality is, the asexual spectrum and tips on coming out, to intimacy, relationships, acephobia and finding joy, this guide will help you better understand your asexual identity alongside deeply relatable anecdotes drawn from Cody's personal experience.
100. Sounds Fake But Okay: An Asexual and Aromantic Perspective on Love, Relationships, Sex, and Pretty Much Anything Else by Sarah Costello and Kayla Kaszyca Drawing on their personal stories, and those of aspec friends all over the world, prepare to explore your microlabels, investigate different models of partnership, delve into the intersection of gender norms and compulsory sexuality and reconsider the meaning of sex - when allosexual attraction is out of the equation.
I haven't read all of these books, so I can't guarantee all of them. But I did my best researching all of them. I was making this list on my own and I was amazed that I could find over 100 books with asexual characters and I wanted to share it!
The Aromantic Book List is now out!
Tagging some people who were excited about this list: @sweetspiderstew @majorgenerally @shayberri789 @53rdcenturyhero @knightoflodis @neonghost39 @rosaazulina
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skamenglishsubs · 6 months
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The evolution of Wilhelm's decisions across the seasons
While preparing to do my season 3 Subtext and Culture posts that are very single-episode focused, I was struck by another thought which is the recurring pattern with which Wilhelm breaks free in stages:
In season 1, Wilhelm is being moved to Hillerska as punishment, and at the start he's pretty much set on resigning himself to his fate. Except he meets Simon, which starts him on his his journey to freedom, as they hesitantly start something.
Erik dying is a huge setback, he tries to revert to being a straight role model, fails miserably, admits to himself he's really in love with another boy, and they start having a relationship in secret. That fails miserably, because of the leaked video, and ultimately because Simon rejects being in a secret relationship.
But he decides that he wants to try having an actual relationship with another boy, despite the royal expectations. He chooses Simon, discarding the idea that a crown prince can't be queer.
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In season 2, Wilhelm is tentatively exploring other relationships with other members of the upper class, who presumably wouldn't have a problem with a hidden relationship.
Meanwhile, Simon is apparently in a public relationship with Marcus, this causes Wilhelm to be consumed by jealousy, and all his other relationship attempts fail miserably. He doesn't want someone else, he wants Simon. And eventually Simon comes around to accepting being in a hidden relationship with Wilhelm, if that's the only way it could work.
But he decides that he wants to try being open about having a relationship with another boy, despite the royal expectations. He chooses Simon, discarding the idea that the monarchy can dictate his public image.
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In season 3, both Wilhelm and Simon are trying to make their public relationship work, and they overcome the awkwardness of being seen together at school at least.
They try to combine Wilhelm's role as crown prince with their relationship. He tries doing the job, the charity foundation, the formal birthday dinner while including Simon, and it fails miserably because of the intense pressure that's being put on him due to his role, and due to him and his family's inability to deal with their grief after Erik.
So the show slowly moves to this inevitable depressing conclusion where Wilhelm resigns himself to his fate. He says goodbye to Simon, makes up with his family, and appears to accept his duty.
But he decides fuck all that shit, despite the royal expectations. He chooses Simon, discarding the entire monarchy, finally breaking free all the way.
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The show is filled with points in the story where Wilhelm could have made a different choice, veering off his path. He slips up a bunch of times, he chooses to break up after Erik dies, he chooses to make out with Felice, he chooses his duty to spite August. But he gets there in the end, he makes enough good decisions, and each one brings him closer and closer to freedom.
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Okay question. Cause I see everybody be like “this is not true to Wilhelms character” “end of s2 wilhelm would never” and I just don’t understand that point of view? To me this makes so much sense as yeah he ended s2 with saying that it was him - but as simons friend also pointed out: he did that without talking to Simon about it. And I feel like with everything happening around him it makes so much sense to act the way he does. Is it good behavior? No, but with the way he was raised I wouldn’t expect otherwise. And also, it’s not like he’s the worst person to ever exist (also it is hilarious to me that he tries to solve every conflict between him and Simon by having sex or making out - peak teenage behavior). I’m just curious as to your pov of his character this season so far.
I think this is very much true to Wilhelm's character. Impulsivity and protectiveness have always been two of his key traits and we see that consistently throughout the season. He often acts impulsively to protect himself and/or Simon, even if he ends up doing the opposite in the end.
And it is because of how he was raised that he doesn't check with people before acting. He has never had a good example of that. He has always had decisions made for him. He has never been given the privilege of a choice, and he has been told that that is love. It makes sense that he replicates that with the one person he loves more than anyone else. He is making decisions for Simon because he has learned by example that love is protecting people even when they don't understand what they are being protected from, even when they don't want protection.
Wilhelm also has a history of projecting his feelings onto people. Constantly. We've seen it since season one. The first example that comes to mind is when he tells Simon that dealing is "so fucking low" when he is the one in the middle of a potential drug scandal. So it makes sense that Wilhelm continues to project his own feelings and insecurities onto people throughout this season. We see it in season two when he does whatever that was with Felice. We see it in season three with the Erik stuff.
Wilhelm has committed at this point. He came out, he is out, and he's with Simon. So, to him, pushing it in everyone's face at school, not having to hide, is exactly what he and Simon wanted. But then he has this other side where he needs to control how everything is working within the royal family/court, so he needs to have Simon under control. He doesn't take a second to think about how Simon has his own opinions because he's acting impulsively almost all of the time.
You mention how Wilhelm seems to always turn to sex or making out, and yeah it's because he's a teenager, but it's also because physical touch is his love language. He's using it to make up with Simon, sure, but he's also using it to just show Simon "hey, I love you, and I know we're in a rough spot, but I still love you."
So to me, this all tracks.
Impulsive? Check. Projecting? Check. Not asking for input on things he should have input on? CHECK.
True to character.
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xianyoon · 3 months
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         𝒶 𝓃𝒾𝑔𝒽𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝓇𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓂𝒷𝑒𝓇
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      𝐀 𝐑𝐄𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐘 𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐏 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓
welcome to my regency-inspired selfship event! watch happy couples have their spotlight on the floor, share a sweet kiss on the terrace – so much can happen in one night! watch out for certain doors – some rooms are only open to dearest associates, but the rest of the manor shall remain accessible to all. have fun – there are 4 sections of this event, so i'm sure you'll find something you like!
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── ✧ event one : the viewing room
this room of the manor is open to all! take a look at the moodboards, and perhaps you'd receive one yourself? there will be 25 slots open – only one selfship per entry, and each participant is only allowed one moodboard. reminder that i reserve the right to delete requests that i am uncomfortable with.
how to join this event :
send in your selfship (name x character’s name)
the fandom your f/o is from + a colour
you must send in your entry with the emoji –> 🪽for me to distinguish from other parts of the event!
participants will receive a regency-inspired moodboard based on their selfship!
16 SLOTS LEFT
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── ✧ event two : the lustrous ballroom
the ballroom is open for all! this will be an open collaboration – you are welcome to deviate slightly! multifandom and open to all mediums ( writing, art, edits, music, etc ).
gold – an anonymous letter, asks you to meet them beneath the moonlight.
ivory – a kiss on the hand leads you towards the rest of the dancing guests.
ameliorate– your romance develops through secret letters.
beauteous – can a political marriage truly turn into something genuine?
opulent – the person you’ve danced with all night was the town's notorious rake. 
panache – you agree to a fake courtship with another.
resplendent –the artist your parents commissioned seems to be the real treasure. 
ethereal – a clandestine kiss under the moonlight threatens to turn into more.
felicity – the most chased after of the season asks you for a dance.
reverie – you catch the eye of your old friend, who wants to know the new you.
the collaboration ends on 30th of august. please tag me when you finish so i can reblog it! 18+ blogs are welcome to make it NSFW, but if i see ageless blogsノminors doing that, you will be blocked on sight.
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── ✧ event three : the secret garden
this terrace is only open to the lady's associates. her mutuals, upon entering, will receive a drabble of their selfship with the ballroom's prompts. one selfship only, and one drabble! there will only be 10 slots for this section!
how to join this event :
send in your genshin selfship (name x character’s name)
genshin fandom only + a brief personality description of yourself. -
choose any prompt from the ballroom part of the event.
check the google docs to see more decisions that need to be made.
participants will receive a drabble of what goes on in the secret garden.
you must send in your entry with the emoji –> 🦢 for me to distinguish from other parts of the event!
EVENT CLOSED.
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── ✧ event four : the dining parlour
the dining hall is open to all! take a break from the excitement of the evening & grab a glass of champagne – or fresh berry juice, for our underaged guests. take a seat with your fノo . . . and remember that you are never truly alone at the table. there will be 10 slots each ( 20 slots total ) for the champagne and berry juice sections! ageless blogs and minors will not be accepted for champagne. reminder that i reserve the right to delete requests that i am uncomfortable with !!!
how to join this event :
berry juice:
send in a short write-up about you & your personality. participants can send in a brief write-up of their relationship with their f/o (open-fandom).
participants will receive a lady whistledown-esque article about the season’s diamond couple!
you must send in your entry with the emoji -> 🥤 for me to distinguish from other parts of the event!
5 SLOTS LEFT
champagne (18+ only):
send in a short write-up about you & your personality. participants can send in a brief write-up of their relationship with their f/o (open-fandom).
participants will receive a lady whistledown-esque article about the season’s diamond couple!
there may be some spicy observations – hence, 18+.
you must send in your entry with the emoji -> 🥂 for me to distinguish from other parts of the event!
4 SLOTS LEFT
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mgwbanmott · 7 months
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I've never understood the constant hate that Wilhelm receives. I don't know if it's a matter of people relating more to Simon or what but I feel like in terms of what they have done wrong, they're pretty on par, at least to me.
Take the part where Wilhelm denies it's him in the sex tape. Yeah, that was wrong of him. And we have to think about how specifically it was wrong of him in Simon's eyes. It was wrong of him because he left Simon all alone. But at the same time, Simon is leaving Wilhelm all alone by breaking up with him. And I understand that it's not the same, Wilhelms actions are worse. But I feel like people willingly forget that simon has a support system of people he can trust completely. He has a supportive family and supportive friends outside of Wilhelm. For Wilhelm, he only had felice, and even then they weren't so close when the breakup happened.
Additionally to this, we learn about how Wilhelm is very susceptible to pressure from his family in s3 e5 when he mentions how he wanted to remain silent in terms of the video, but he was pressured into making a statement. And I get that he made a promise and he did have a choice, but he is also 16 and WAS heavily pressured. Like, the camera crew was hired before Wilhelm even spoke to his mother about the situation.
The argument scene in s3 e5 in general was amazing and really told you about Wilhelms character motivations and helps you understand, but I feel like many people didn't take it as that. They took it in the sense that simon was afraid and that's why he broke it off with Wilhelm again. But I feel like that's fundamentally misunderstanding the point. I feel like the point is that simon is really understanding the position that Wilhelm is in and how he slots into it and how he is now in a similar spot because he's with Wilhelm. It's him defining the relationship, not him realizing that Wilhelm is bad for him. it's not Wilhelm who's bad for him, it's the position that's bad for him. In addition, Simon has probably gained many self esteem issues from the media.
But overall, W and S's problem isn't that they are bad for each other, their problem is that they have barriers in place which prevent them from talking about certain issues which need to be talked about.
This is not really me posting about how Wilhelm was in the right, because he's not always in the right. It's more of me saying that people need to realize that he has understandable reasons for most of his actions and it's not like simon is an angel. They BOTH constantly make bad decisions (as do all other characters in this series) which is why I think they're so interesting.
The point I'm trying to make is don't let your like/dislike of a character warp their actions. This is how we get statements like "Wilhelm and Simon aren't compatible" like, YES THEY ARE. you're just too busy demonizing Wilhelm to see it.
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