#dirk mention lol

[poorly-drawn-cryptids-homestuck]

John, how old are you? Do pucas even age like humans?

jane: we have absolutely zero concept of time! jane: hope this helps. john: I bet dirk knows- jane: yeah he probably does :/

[galaxicnerd]

djdaily post :33

[disguisedcheezed]

it's so funny to me when people just believe that john is straight because he said "i'm not a homosexual" once because

1. you are believing the words of a 13 yr old who was 12 the day before.

2. people forget that he's 13 when he said that, and that he is not old enough for a proper romantic relationship.

3. john egbert doesn't think. in fact, he'd rather not AT ALL. like. EVER.

4. why would he think about ever liking a girl? can't he just say it out right if he does?

also, this part in a nutshell:

karkat: DO YOU WANNA BE IN A RELATIONSHI-

john: i am not a homosexual. 👍

5. god king of repression had you fooled FOOL.

and the most ironic part is that it's the same shit homophobic parents say like "yeah, but when you were 13 you said you liked girls soooo"

[conceptofjoy]

homestuck introduced the concept of callignous romance and then made the most hatable character in post canon. and then drew him like that. they knew what the fuck they were doing

[lilacflowersss]

(zoom in for better quality)

Original ⬇️

[badlydrawn-brostrider]

Hey Bro, what's it like seeing Dee as a wholeass grown adult who does taxes and shit?

BRO: It is so fuckin' weird. The guy is older than me, Jesus-

BRO: I try not to think about it too much or it'll drive me insane . . but . . .

BRO: Honestly? Dunno how I feel. Seein' what my kid could have ended up like if he had gotten to grow up halfway decently.

BRO: It's nice to see where his creativity could have taken him if it weren't for me and the game. It also . . feels not too good. How no matter what, he's screwed over. Even if at least this time he got to grow up.

BRO: Anyways, puttin' an end to that train of thought. All in all? It's just plain fuckin' weird. The asshole treats me like a goddamn kid.

[witchoftime]

ok we've done kankri x dirk as a davekat parallel. who's gonna get on the voidmary (roxy x porrim) rosemary parallel ship. just saying. they would be perfect together

[nana2009]

currently thinking about how since kanika likes dolls(specifically the vintage creepier ones) uncle-grandpa dirk one day gifts her THE ACTUAL HAUNTED ANNABELLE after she mentioned something about how pretty she looked while watching a documentary together or something

and of course dave is distraught because dUDE YOU JUST GAVE MY 4 YEAR OLD A POSSESSED DEVIL DOLL WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING but he cannot for the love of god pry it away from kani's grasp

[r0semultiverse]

Where in Beyond Canon is Arquisprite?

Took inspiration from the above post by @pastabaguette and decided to expand upon it due to The Plot Point update as well as some stuff seen even before Vriska’s arc started in The Point.

Let's examine some stuff that may tell us where Arquiusprite is at this time, seeing as we seemingly have only one chapter in The Point left. I think we've got a lead on his whereabouts already.

We've got horses and horse-adjacent creatures.

We've got a robot that looks like it's literally ripped from Equius' hive with a notable missing horn hole and a dent in the head.

There's also this twitter response from James Roach which could be interpreted as suggesting Equius' return in some way at some point in the future.

OP, I'm not saying you're right, but I am saying that if Dirk were to consult anyone on horses, it would probably be a mashup of his AI & Equius. Also Void player behavior apparently! Also Dirk has narrative reality warpy powers & we aren't sure as to the limits of those yet!

Below are some reddit notes about classpects that also lead credence to the idea that Arquisrpite is on Deltritus with Dirk at this time. Outside of the obvious fact that we haven't seen him in The Plot Point or the bonus comics with Jasprosesprite at all as of the Davepetasprite^2 feather chapter release.

Are the robots in case Terezi goes ultimate? Are they backup bodies for Rosebot? A metal body for Arquisprite? Who knows, maybe all three! 🤷‍♀️ Robots are being made by someone though (for some purpose) and they have troll horn slots on their craniums. The exact style robot that Equius used to make back on Alternia; so, make of that what you will!

Also maybe they just need a sprite to kick off whatever makeshift sburb/sgrub copycat they're trying to get running and seeing as Arquiusprite is a splinter of Dirk, it's fitting that he would accompany him. Plus the sprites can kind of just seem to be wherever & whenever the story needs them to be? Seeing as how Jasprose kidnapped Jane in the meat timeline, but in the candy timeline the sprites just kind of seemed to not do much or be absent entirely after a certain point.

There's at least a guaranteed non-zero chance Arquiusprite is on Deltritus.

[skenpiel]

homestuck fans when theres no rhyme or reason to the trickster designs and its literally just a jumbled mess of hideous colors and vague candy themes which means theres no consistency to analyze to help with making fan designs

[bloodwards]

got a very rude reminder that normal people have no fucking clue about tumblr memes and whatnot when I was trying to explain to my d&d group why I have a very soft spot for a PC (who’s been dead for a while)

they were like “oh you like him cuz he’s a bad boy” and I was like no! I want to minimize him and put him in my pocket.... he’s my meow meow.... he’s a horrible person to YOU, I get him though....

and they all just stared at me.  it did not help that the other tumblrina of our group wasn’t there for the conversation lol

I was trying so hard to think of a way to explain it in a normal way, but I just couldn’t think of anything on the spot tbh

[coridallasmultipass]

On HS classpects I used to be so messed up about how none of the classes fit me as a Heart player (when I still IDed as a woman) and I was like ughhhh guess I'll play Knight or some basic ass class because nothing for female players or the ungendered classes seemed right, but Prince would've, and of course that category was gendered. (Ppl were like, 'You can still say that!' Yeah, but I'm mildly self-conscious about adhering to canon. I decided to just start saying it anyway.) Well, turns out I'm trans, so, that was just meant to be.

The funny part is I'm aromantic as fuck despite loving the idea of relationships, but that kinda struggle I've dealt with discovering that about myself is exactly why that classpect would be a perfectly ironic fit.

[beescake]

i am in love with your sollux i think

sollux love party :]

if you’re interested heres some of my personal fondness thoughts on him.. big warning for the mega long read ahead aye

as we alr know sollux's rejection of participation somewhat mirrors dave's rejection of heroism, but even without getting cooked to completion i still find sollux's character v compelling beyond the fourth wall

as someone who doesnt get a pinch of that Protagonist Sparkle to begin with, he can openly say he wants to leave anytime…. and unlike dave, he actually Can leave the scene anytime. but he can never be truly Free from the story via permanent character death like the other trolls.

his irrelevancy is indeed relevant - he’s there so u can point him out.

while his image is intended to be a relic of past internet subculture, his role is not only about hehehaha being a Chad or a 2000s cyberforum 2²chan haxxor ragequit gamebro.

his continued existence also happens to add a Bit to the overarching themes of homestuck! a Bit that gives him longer-lasting thematic relevance compared to the trolls who could’ve had more character potential but didnt get to survive beyond the main story.

the Bit in question:

his defiance contributes to the illusion of agency (treating characters = people with autonomy). he’s “aware” of it, and that recognition is worth noting enough to forcibly keep him alive as both reward and punishment.

considering how his personality & classpect is designed its definitely a very haha thing for hussie to do LOL. he’s made to be op asf so he's resigned to doing dirty work, gradually deteriorating along the way but never truly dying. as fans have mentioned before, him openly rejecting involvement after a while of grim tolerance is like if the sim u were controlling suddenly stopped, looked up and gave u the finger while u were step six into the walkthrough for Every Possible Sim Death Animation.

but since he’s just a sim… the more he hates it, the more you keep him around. if ur sim started complaining abt your whimsical household storyline you’d definitely keep that little fuck.

but yeah i like that sollux is just idling. the significance of his presence being that one dude who's always reliably Somewhere, root core Unchanged, no individual ambitions (possibly due to fear of consequence?), and design-wise: a staple representative product of his time.

compared to dirk's character, who has aged phenomenally well into the present (themes of control + AR + artificial intelligence, clearer exploration around navigating relationships/sexuality, infinite possibilities of self-splinterhood and trait inheritance), sollux's potential is really... contained. bitter. defeatist. limiting and frustrating in the way old tech is.

the world continues moving on to shinier, brighter, more advanced automated things - minimalist and metaverse or whatever but sollux is still here 🧍‍♂️ going woohoo redblue 3d. (tho personally i imagine his vibe similar to what the kids call cassette futurism on pinterest mixed w more grimy grunge insectoid influences eheh)

conceptually-speaking,

at the foundation of it all, the rapid pace of modern development was built off the understanding of ppl like sollux in the past, who were There actively at work while the dough was still beginning to rise

thats one of the cool things abt the idea of trolls preceding humans! the idea that trolls like sollux excelled back when lots of basic shit still needed to be discovered, building structures like networks and codes from scratch, and humans will eventually inherit and reinvent that knowledge in ways that become so optimized it makes the old manual effort seem archaic, slow, and labour-intensive.

but despite information/resources/shortcuts being more accessible now, much of the new highly-anticipated stuff released on trend still end up unfinished, inefficient, or expiring quickly due to cutting corners under severe capitalistic pressures

meanwhile, some of the old stuff frm past generations of thorough, exploratory and perfectionistic development still remains working, complete, and ever so sturdy.

those things continue to exist, just outside our periphery with either:

zero purpose left for modern needs (outdated/obsolete)

or

far too important to replace or destroy, bcs of its surprisingly essential and circumstantial usefulness in one niche specific area.

which are honestly? both points that sum up sollux pree well.

dramatic ending sorry. anw are u still on the fence or are u Sick abt him like me </3

[badlydrawn-brostrider]

Do you ever talk to Rose (either one)? I feel like you would get along.

BRO: Rose?

BRO: No, I don't really interact with them. Mini likes them though, goes out with the Lil' Rose when she's free. D sometimes brings Rose the elder with him on visits and. Well. It's awkward, puttin' it lightly.

BRO: I swear those girls can look straight into my soul, not a pleasant experience. I'm civil with them when we do interact, don't get me wrong, it's just....

BRO: Nevermind, point is they don't wish to hang 'round me and I don't particularly wish to be 'round them. Why would they? Wasn't even a proper guardian to the kid I raised, I ain't about to start parentin' his twin.

[nekropsii]

Small Atomic Ask Bomb!!

I've got a bunch of short asks that I'd hate to spam the dash with individually, so I'll just put 'em here, under the cut!!

Content Warning: Long, Brief Discussions of Racism, Misogyny, Grooming, Brief Mentions of Incest and Pedophilia in Fanfiction.

I've always been a hater, and I honestly don't really think it's a bad thing - not as much as everyone says, at least! I think being kind of a bitch about things that don't matter is good for you, actually. Gets the urge to be angry out in a way that's healthier than just snapping at people in critical moments. I also just think being strong and passionate in your convictions is good for you. Being a hater gives you a spine if you do it right, and it fires a gunshot and scatters people you don't really want to be around. It also has the funny side effect of people thinking I take things way more seriously than I do, just because I'm opinionated and will state said opinions clearly. Big fan of this meme:

This is me.

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I used to peek in there every now and then, just to be nosy. Incest at the top, always. Or straight up pedo shit. Sigh. Looked in the Mituna tag a couple times. CroTuna fucking nightmare hell dimension, always. Or KanTuna, which I also have gripes with. Or KanMiTula, which I have even more gripes with.

It is my understanding that the state of Homestuck fanfiction hasn't gotten much better since the 2010s. Everyone is wrong and no one is normal. Sad.

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I don't know if the mere act of only making Jade and Jake brown out of all the Kids is Racist on its own, per se, but it is kinda silly in the sense that, you know, John and Jade are siblings, so realistically they'd look similar. And... People absolutely do get racist about it. Like, making Jade and Jake uniquely huge, hairy, threatening, and oddly shaped - gangly in the context of Jade, buff as hell in the context of Jake. I've seen some SEVERELY racist drawings where Jade and/or Jake were the only hints of melanin in the Kid line up and... Oh my god. It can get to straight up caricature levels. Watermelons and everything. Just comedically racist.

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Genuinely one of the dumbest fucking things in the world. People will say literally anything. Saying Damara isn't Japanese is on par with calling Porrim a fucking Men's Rights Activist. It's a funny little claim people who are grievously wrong say as a condemnation of the Alpha Trolls for no reason. Why. To look smart? To fit in? Dumbass. Notice how they always have to invent bullshit lies to critique anything instead of just saying things that are true. It really frustrates me how 99.9% of Alpha Troll criticism just isn't at all legitimate when there's some real, genuine issues you could critique. It's stupid horseshit. I hate it so badly.

I don't actually care whether or not someone likes the Alpha Trolls, but at least hate them accurately. Come on.

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@sleepy-apparition

Everyone is so, so quick to turn a blind eye to just how violently misogynistic Kankri is, lmfao. Genuinely, I don't think I've ever seen anyone other than myself bring up the fact that he's an avid Slut-Shamer in the modern day. Other than that, I only really saw older Mituna fanatics bring it up over in the early-mid 2010s, but none of them are around these days.

Genuinely, some of the shit he says is so appalling, lol. Kankri FULLY deserves to get his ass beat.

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I have said this before but I'll say it again - I do not think a Red Romantic Relationship will fix Dirk, or even really help him all that much. Before he gets into a RedRom, he needs some therapy, a break, and mood stabilizers.

However, I'm thoroughly of the opinion that a good BlackRom could work wonders on him, way more than a RedRom would. I think a solid, established Pitch Relationship with, like, Caliborn would be genuinely great for him, both mentally and in a Character Development sense. I hold zero interest in watching Dirk and Jake badly fumble a traditional romantic relationship - that notion is painful to me. ... But I do think I could read a full Intermission's worth of Dirk and Caliborn fucking around and not get tired of it once. They have a fantastic dynamic. It'd be good for Caliborn, too, I think.

This has been my Dirkuu propaganda bit. Thank you.

Also, the Voyeuristic feel of how people handle his Mental Illness. It makes me uncomfortable.

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True. I don't have any other remarks to make about this, you're just correct. True.

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... Fuckin'... Why, though? What- what's the appeal? There's nothing there. I literally cannot conceive any way in which that would be compelling, and I'd say Hal and Kankri are pretty high up there in the list of Male Homestuck Characters I Enjoy.

People will do anything but pay attention to Female Characters for five minutes. God. Lol.

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It's literally just DaveKat 2. I don't think it even qualifies as a Crack Ship when it's just a variant of The Fandom's Most Darling M/M OTP. It's just a deeply mid RarePair. Crack Ship would be, like, Dirk Strider x Rainbow Dash.

Dirk x RD was a popular Crack Ship, sure, but it's still a Crack Ship on basis of being a Crossover Pairing.

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I can't recall any specific instances of seeing this myself, but I'll believe it. People will do anything except be normal about Vriska. People will fight the war against Vriska on the side of and against Vriska at the same time. People will call her a Huge 8itch but then call her pathetic when she stops being a Huge 8itch.

We love Misogyny, I guess.

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Well, he is based on Tumblr, after all. Particularly how dogshit the politics are on here. Of course he would. He'd do numbers on here, considering his Woke Hate Speech.

It's called Bubblr, by the way. Like, canonically. We do know what it's called.

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It's actually based on the Three Wise Monkeys. You know, that old Japanese Proverb that goes "See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil"? That.

Kurloz is Speak No Evil, Meulin is Hear No Evil, Mituna is See No Evil.

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Great Question. My personal guess is that he's a little too nuanced for a lot of people to be comfortable with handling. He throws out too much surface-level Bigotry that people aren't willing to ignore because it isn't Racism for many to feel comfortable making him their Blorbo. When Dave says the N-Word and talks about how fucking Racist he is and it literally never gets acknowledged or resolved, that's fine and dandy, but god forbid Caliborn be a Misogynist in the funniest way possible AND have that get acknowledged literally constantly as a problem. The fact that Caliborn isn't a Fuckable White 13-Year-Old Twink means none of his crimes are ever forgivable because he's ugly and unshippable, or whatever.

The fact that he's Mentally Disabled doesn't help. People can't fucking STAND IT when a character is Mentally Disabled in a way that isn't Cute and Consumable, much less a character who is Unconsumably Mentally Disabled AND Complicated. It's just not allowed!!

[conceptofjoy]

Share a spare beta bro thought?

omg weird dirk <3 (they are both weird)

hmm sometimes i feel like people lean a little too heavily on the cal influence to explain his actions.. if anything i think cal is more of an instigator than an outright brain washer. cal didnt turn dave into a piece of shit like bro and he grew up with him too, the difference is that bro Likes cal and dave doesnt and thats what lead to their difference in experience. obvs much later on in the comic jack gouges both his eyes out bc of cal but i think its one of those things that was semi retconned in later? like its not like hussie knew that cal was going to be LE from the beginning lol.

anyways people dont want to make their favorite characters totally shitty people which is fair (also why alpha bro hcs usually lean on the tamer side). but u can rlly go crazy with the guardians, like they're not supposed to be Characters in the same way the players are. they never outright talk, only leave weird scribbled out messages for their wards, like i mentioned before, they are 1dimentional caricatures first, then people second. it makes them difficult to write for them beyond a small comic ofc, but at the same time it simplifies it.