#disability in worldbuilding

[gaynaturalistghost]

More disabled characters and stories in fantasy or ttrpg’s!

[cy-cyborg]

Dealing with Healing and Disability in fantasy: Writing Disability

[ID: An image of the main character from Eragon, a white teenage boy with blond hair in silver armour as he sits, with his hand outstretched. On his hand is a glowing blue mark. He is visibly straining as he attempts to heal a large creature in front of him. /End ID]

I'm a massive fan of the fantasy genre, which is why it's so incredibly frustrating when I see so much resistance to adding disability representation to fantasy works. People's go-to reason for leaving us out is usually something to the effect of "But my setting has magic so disability wouldn't exist, it can just be healed!" so let's talk about magic, specifically healing magic, in these settings, and how you can use it without erasing disability from your story.

Ok, let's start with why you would even want to avoid erasing disability from a setting in the first place. I talked about this in a lot more detail in my post on The Miracle Cure. this line of thinking is another version of this trope, but applied to a whole setting (or at least, to the majority of people in the setting) instead of an individual, so it's going to run into the same issues I discussed there. To summarise the points that are relevant to this particular version of the trope though:

Not every disabled person wants or needs a cure - many of us see our disability as a part of our identity. Do difficulties come with being disabled? absolutely! It's literally part of the definition, but for some people in the disabled community, if you took our disabilities away, we would be entirely different people. While it is far from universal, there is a significant number of us who, if given a magical cure with no strings attached, would not take it. Saying no one in your setting would be disabled because these healing spells exists ignores this part of the community.

It messes with the stakes of your story - Just like how resurrecting characters or showing that this is something that is indeed possible in the setting can leave your audience feeling cheated or like they don't have to worry about a character *actually* ever dying. healing a character's disability, or establishing that disability doesn't exist in your setting because "magic" runs into the same problem. It will leave your readers or viewers feeling like they don't have to worry about your characters getting seriously hurt because it will only be temporary, which means your hero's actions carry significantly less risk, which in turn, lowers the stakes and tension if not handled very, very carefully.

It's an over-used trope - quite plainly and simply, this trope shows up a lot in the fantasy genre, to the point where I'd say it's just overused and kind of boring.

So with the "why should you avoid it" covered, let's look at how you can actually handle the topic.

Limited Access and Expensive Costs

One of the most common ways to deal with healing and disability in a fantasy setting, is to make the healing magic available, but inaccessible to most of the population. The most popular way to do that is by making the services of a magical healer capable of curing a disability really expensive to the point that most people just can't afford it. If this is the approach you're going to use, you also typically have to make that type of magic quite rare. To use D&D terms, if every first level sorcerer, bard, cleric and druid can heal a spinal injury, it's going to result in a lot of people who are able to undercut those massive prices and the expense will drop as demand goes down. If that last sentence didn't give you a hint, this is really popular method in stories that are critiquing capitalistic mindsets and ideologies, and is most commonly used by authors from the USA and other countries with a similar medical system, since it mirrors a lot of the difficulties faced by disabled Americans. If done right, this approach can be very effective, but it does need to be thought through more carefully than I think people tend to do. Mainly because a lot of fantasy stories end with the main character becoming rich and/or powerful, and so these prohibitively expensive cure become attainable by the story's end, which a lot of authors and writer's just never address. Of course, another approach is to make the availability of the magic itself the barrier. Maybe there just aren't that many people around who know the magic required for that kind of healing, so even without a prohibitive price tag, it's just not something that's an option for most people. If we're looking at a D&D-type setting, maybe you need to be an exceptionally high level to cast the more powerful healing spell, or maybe the spell requires some rare or lost material component. I'd personally advise people to be careful using this approach, since it often leads to stories centred around finding a miracle cure, which then just falls back into that trope more often than not.

Just outright state that some characters don't want/need it

Another, admittedly more direct approach, is to make it that these "cures" exist and are easily attainable, but to just make it that your character or others they encounter don't want or need it. This approach works best for characters who are born with their disabilities or who already had them for a long time before a cure was made available to them. Even within those groups though, this method works better with some types of characters than others depending on many other traits (personality, cultural beliefs, etc), and isn't really a one-size-fits-all solution, but to be fair, that's kind of the point. Some people will want a cure for their disabilities, others are content with their body's the way they are. There's a few caveats I have with this kind of approach though:

you want to make sure you, as the author, understand why some people in real life don't want a cure, and not just in a "yeah I know these people exist but I don't really get it" kind of way. I'm not saying you have to have a deep, personal understanding or anything, but some degree of understanding is required unless you want to sound like one of those "inspirational" body positivity posts that used to show up on Instagram back in the day.

Be wary when using cultural beliefs as a reasoning. It can work, but when media uses cultural beliefs as a reason for turning down some kind of cure, it's often intending to critique extreme beliefs about medicine, such as the ones seen in some New Age Spirituality groups and particularly intense Christian churches. As a general rule of thumb, it's probably not a good idea to connect these kinds of beliefs to disabled people just being happy in their bodies. Alternatively, you also need to be mindful of the "stuck in time" trope - a trope about indigenous people who are depicted as primitive or, as the name suggests, stuck in an earlier time, for "spurning the ways of the white man" which usually includes medicine or the setting's equivalent magic. I'm not the best person to advise you on how to avoid this specific trope, but my partner (who's Taino) has informed me of how often it shows up in fantasy specifically and we both thought it was worth including a warning at least so creators who are interested in this method know to do some further research.

Give the "cures" long-lasting side effects

Often in the real world, when a "cure" for a disability does exist, it's not a perfect solution and comes with a lot of side effects. For example, if you loose part of your arm in an accident, but you're able to get to a hospital quickly with said severed arm, it can sometimes be reattached, but doing so comes at a cost. Most people I know who had this done had a lot of issues with nerve damage, reduced strength, reduced fine-motor control and often a great deal of pain with no clear source. Two of the people I know who's limbs were saved ended up having them optionally re-amputated only a few years later. Likewise, I know many people who are paraplegics and quadriplegics via spinal injuries, who were able to regain the use of their arms and/or legs. However, the process was not an easy one, and involved years of intense physiotherapy and strength training. For some of them, they need to continue to do this work permanently just to maintain use of the effected limbs, so much so that it impacts their ability to do things like work a full-time job and engage in their hobbies regularly, and even then, none of them will be able bodied again. Even with all that work, they all still experience reduced strength and reduced control of the limbs. depending on the type, place and severity of the injury, some people are able to get back to "almost able bodied" again - such was the case for my childhood best friend's dad, but they often still have to deal with chronic pain from the injury or chronic fatigue.

Even though we are talking about magic in a fantasy setting, we can still look to real-life examples of "cures" to get ideas. Perhaps the magic used has a similar side effect. Yes, your paraplegic character can be "cured" enough to walk again, but the magic maintaining the spell needs a power source to keep it going, so it draws on the person's innate energy within their body, using the very energy the body needs to function and do things like move their limbs. They are cured, but constantly exhausted unless they're very careful, and if the spell is especially strong, the body might struggle to move at all, resulting in something that looks and functions similar to the nerve damage folks with spinal injuries sometimes deal with that causes that muscle weakness and motor control issues. Your amputee might be able to have their leg regrown, but it will always be slightly off. The regrown leg is weaker and causes them to walk with a limp, maybe even requiring them to use a cane or other mobility aid.

Some characters might decide these trade-offs are worth it, and while this cures their initial disability, it leaves them with another. Others might simply decide the initial disability is less trouble than these side effects, and choose to stay as they are.

Consider if these are actually cures

Speaking of looking to the real world for ideas, you might also want to consider whether these cures are doing what the people peddling them are claiming they do. Let's look at the so-called autism cures that spring up every couple of months as an example.

Without getting into the… hotly debated specifics, there are many therapies that are often labelled as "cures" for autism, but in reality, all they are doing is teaching autistic people how to make their autistic traits less noticeable to others. This is called masking, and it's a skill that often comes at great cost to an autistic person's mental health, especially when it's a behaviour that is forced on them. Many of these therapies give the appearance of being a cure, but the disability is still there, as are the needs and difficulties that come with it, they're just hidden away. From an outside perspective though, it often does look like a success, at least in the short-term. Then there are the entirely fake cures with no basis in reality, the things you'll find from your classic snake-oil salesmen. Even in a fantasy setting where real magic exists, these kinds of scams and misleading treatments can still exist. In fact, I think it would make them even more common than they are in the real world, since there's less suspension of disbelief required for people to fall for them. "What do you mean this miracle tonic is a scam? Phil next door can conjure flames in his hand and make the plants grow with a snap of his fingers, why is it so hard to believe this tonic could regrow my missing limb?"

I think the only example of this approach I've seen, at least recently, is from The Owl House. The magic in this world can do incredible things, but it works in very specific and defined ways. Eda's curse (which can be viewed as an allegory for many disabilities and chronic illnesses) is seemingly an exception to this, and as such, nothing is able to cure it. Treat it, yes, but not cure it. Eda's mother doesn't accept this though, and seeks out a cure anyway and ends up falling for a scam who's "treatments" just make things worse.

In your own stories, you can either have these scams just not work, or kind of work, but in ways that are harmful and just not worth it, like worse versions of the examples in the previous point. Alternatively, like Eda, it's entirely reasonable that a character who's been the target of these scams before might just not want to bother anymore. Eda is a really good example of this approach handled in a way that doesn't make her sad and depressed about it either. She's tried her mum's methods, they didn't work, and now she's found her own way of dealing with it that she's happy with. She only gets upset when her boundaries are ignored by Luz and her mother.

Think about how the healing magic is actually working

If you have a magic system that leans more on the "hard magic" side of things, a great way to get around the issue of healing magic erasing disability is to stop and think about how your healing magic actually works.

My favourite way of doing this is to make healing magic work by accelerating the natural processes of your body. Your body will, given enough time (assuming it remains infection-free) close a slash from a sword and mend a broken bone, but it will never regrow it's own limbs. It will never heal damage to it's own spinal cord. It will never undo whatever causes autism or fix it's own irregularities. Not without help. Likewise, healing magic alone won't do any of these things either, it's just accelerating the existing process and usually, by extension making it safer, since a wound staying open for an hour before you get to a healer is much less likely to get infected than one that slowly and naturally heals over a few weeks. In one of my own works, I take this even further by making it that the healing magic is only accelerating cell growth and repair, but the healer has to direct it. In order to actually heal, the healer needs to know the anatomy of what they're fixing to the finest detail. A spell can reconnect a torn muscle to a bone, but if you don't understand the structures that allow that to happen in the first place, you're likely going to make things worse. For this reason, you won't really see people using this kind of magic to, say, regrow limbs, even though it technically is possible. A limb is a complicated thing. The healer needs to be able to perfectly envision all the bones, the cartilage, the tendons and ligaments, the muscles (including the little ones, like those found in your skin that make your hair stand on end and give you goose bumps), the fat and skin tissues, all the nerves, all the blood vessels, all the structures within the bone that create your blood. Everything, and they need to know how it all connects, how it is supposed to move and be able to keep that clearly in their mind simultaneously while casting. Their mental image also has to match with the patient's internal "map" of the body and the lost limb, or they'll continue to experience phantom limb sensation even if the healing is successful. It's technically possible, but the chances they'll mess something up is too high, and so it's just not worth the risk to most people, including my main character.

Put Restrictions on the magic

This is mostly just the same advice as above, but for softer magic systems. put limits and restrictions on your healing magic. These can be innate (so things the magic itself is just incapable of doing) or external (things like laws that put limitations on certain types of magic and spells).

An example of internal restriction can be seen in how some people interpret D&D's higher level healing spells like regenerate (a 7th level spell-something most characters won't have access to for quite some time). The rules as written specify that disabilities like lost limbs can be healed using this spell, but some players take this to mean that if a character was born with the disability in question, say, born without a limb, regenerate would only heal them back to their body's natural state, which for them, is still disabled.

An external restriction would be that your setting has outlawed healing magic, perhaps because healing magic carries a lot of risks for some reason, eithe to the caster or the person being healed, or maybe because the healing magic here works by selectively reviving and altering the function of cells, which makes it a form of necromancy, just on a smaller scale. Of course, you can also use the tried and true, "all magic is outlawed" approach too. In either case, it's something that will prevent some people from being able to access it, despite it being technically possible. Other external restrictions could look like not being illegal, per say, but culturally frowned upon or taboo where your character is from.

But what if I don't want to do any of this?

Well you don't have to. These are just suggestions to get you thinking about how to make a world where healing magic and disability exist, but they aren't the only ways. Just the ones I thought of.

Of course, if you'd still rather make a setting where all disability is cured because magic and you just don't want to think about it any deeper, I can't stop you. I do however, want to ask you to at least consider where you are going to draw the line. Disability, in essence, is what happens when the body stops (or never started) functioning "normally". Sometimes that happens because of an injury, sometimes it's just bad luck, but the boundary between disabled and not disabled is not as solid as I think a lot of people expect it to be, and we as a society have a lot of weird ideas about what is and isn't a disability that just, quite plainly and simply, aren't consistent. You have to remember, a magic system won't pick and choose the way we humans do, it will apply universally, regardless of our societal hang-ups about disability.

What do I mean about this?

Well, consider for a moment, what causes aging? it's the result of our body not being able to repair itself as effectively as it used to. It's the body not being able to perform that function "normally". So in a setting where all disability is cured, there would be no aging. No elderly people. No death from old age. If you erase disability, you also erase natural processes like aging. magic won't pick and choose like that, not if you want it to be consistent.

Ok, ok, maybe that's too much of a stretch, so instead, let's look at our stereotypical buff hero covered in scars because he's a badass warrior. but in a world where you can heal anything, why would anything scar? Even if it did, could another healing spell not correct that too? Scars are part of the body's natural healing process, but if no natural healing occurred, why would a scar form? Scars are also considered disabling in and of themselves too, especially large ones, since they aren't as flexible or durable as normal skin and can even restrict growth and movement.

Even common things like needing glasses are, using this definition of disability at least, a disability. glasses are a socially accepted disability aid used to correct your eyes when they do not function "normally".

Now to be fair, in reality, there are several definitions of disability, most of which include something about the impact of society. For example, in Australia (according to the Disability Royal Commission), we define disability as "An evolving concept that results from the interaction between a person with impairment(s) and attitudinal and environmental barriers that hinder their full and effective participation in society on an equal basis with others." - or in laymen's terms, the interaction between a person's impairment and societal barriers like people not making things accessible or holding misinformed beliefs about your impairment (e.g. people in wheelchairs are weaker than people who walk). Under a definition like this, things like scars and needing glasses aren't necessarily disabilities (most of the time) but that's because of how our modern society sees them. The problem with using a definition like this though to guide what your magic system will get rid of, is that something like a magic system won't differentiate between an "impairment" that has social impacts that and one that doesn't. It will still probably get rid of anything that is technically an example of your body functioning imperfectly, which all three of these things are. The society in your setting might apply these criteria indirectly, but really, why would they? Very few people like the side effects of aging on the body (and most people typically don't want to die), the issues that come with scars or glasses are annoying (speaking as someone with both) and I can see a lot of people getting rid of them when possible too. If they don't then it's just using the "not everyone wants it approach" I mentioned earlier. If there's some law or some kind of external pressure to push people away from fixing these more normalised issues, then it's using the "restrictions" method I mentioned earlier too.

Once again, you can do whatever you like with your fantasy setting, but it's something I think that would be worth thinking about at least.

[alpaca-clouds]

Magically Healing Disabilities and the Road to Eugenics

Because this topic comes up again and again - and a lot of abled people just don't get it - let me try to explain this one more time:

If you create a SciFi or Fantasy world in which there are no people with disabilities, because all disabilities can be healed through magic or technology, you are creating an ableistic world, that favors eugenics!

Erasing disabilities from a world is something eugenicists would want to do, nothing else.

A lot of abled people will reply: "But I just want everyone to be able to live their lives at the fullest in my world!" What they do not quite grasp is, that with that they prescribe what "living a life at its fullest" means to people, not realizing that it can mean a whole lot of different things to folks.

Frankly: I do not think I could live my life at its fullest without my autism, thank you very much.

And sure, some might say: "But what is with people who cannot walk or cannot see?" And I am honest: I would be lying if I said that I could imagine living without my eyesight. But I know people with blindness who absolutely do live their life at its fullest and are perfectly fine the way they are. And it is not my place to tell them that they are not.

Yeah, there are absolutely people who totally would take the magical or technological cure - and I do not see any issue with creating a world that offers it to people. I mean, right now I am suffering from what in two weeks will officially be called long COVID, which makes me absolutely unable to bike and other stuff. And if you told me: "Here, take this pill and it goes away" I am going to take that pill ASAP. But forcing me to take the pill would be wrong, don't you think?

Then there is the other argument that comes along. Of: "Alright, some people do not want to be healed, but if there is a cure why should anyone bother to make the world accessible for folks who do not want to be healed? It is their own fault!" (Yes, I had someone argue this to me before.)

So, let me address it like this: Genetically speaking blonde and redhaired people have a higher likelihood to suffer from certain conditions (especially skin and eye related). So, should we say: "Yeah, well, we need to genetically make you dark-haired and darker skinned, or if you disagree we will not pay for your healthcare"?

Probably not.

Or what is with people who just hate eating their veggies, something that we absolutely do know carries health risks? "Either eat your veggies, or we will not take care for you?" That would be super out of line, right?

Or lets talk about something that left folks will hopefully care about: Trans healthcare. Like, sure, there are massive mental health benefits that come from it. But there are other health risks associated with it too. Should folks just not take care of those, because they are "self-imposed"?

Do you see how much of a slippery slope that is?

Not to mention once again: What is and is not considered a disability is at times pretty randomly decided. It is always an artificial line drawn in the sand. What is a "healthy body"?

And I also should once more note: Most disabilities are in fact disabilities people acquire during their life. Through accidents, through other illnesses, through simply aging. Should we criminalize aging to not have to create accessibility stuff for old people with walking aids? Do you really think that would be good?

So, yeah. Not only is a "world without disabilities because magic" fairly dumb if you consider all the aspects of disabilities - it also is very much eugenicist.

[hemipenal-system]

this thread is fucking long and the cut is in an awkward place just bear with it please

so werewolves are a stock horror villain (and the posts directly below this one are about that! go look at them) and don’t get me wrong i love werewolf horrorsmut but i want to see more of:

werewolves who just aren’t scary in any way. like sure the shift may be scary. they may look kinda scary. but they’re just people like everyone else even if they are more ruled by instinct than the average human. i think stuff like that is a nice way to explore what it means to be a person and how humanity can be a fluid category, especially when the werewolves in question are transgender/disabled/personality disorder coded.

like i want some wholesome shit about werewolves who can’t even pass as ambiguously human. they’re just very overtly werewolves: massive sharp, snarling bundles of taut muscles and sinew, 8, 9 feet tall, who are very capable of snapping and killing everything around them

but don’t. because they’re treated well and loved even though they’re not like everyone else. and it doesn’t matter that they aren’t, because they are like everyone else even if they’re not. i know that sounds a bit confusing on the face but i mean stuff like:

- “oh yeah no worries, Sharon from accounting’s a wolf too! no no we love her! remember when we went to topgolf for that company outing? they couldn’t find any clubs in her size so she outdrove us all with clubs a foot too short it was hysterical!”

- “all right you should be scheduled for this week! next two weeks are the same? no right of course not because you need moon days. yeah that’s totally fine i will get that in to HR and you should be all good!”

- “is- no it’s fine- is it ok if i stay shifted in here? the pain is less bad when i’m shifted. no i have no idea why lol. you’re sure? the shedding is ok and everything? aww sweetie i love you too!”

- “i mean, hip dysplasia is normal in wolves your age, and you had fairly active teenage years, so it happens. it’s not anything to worry about though, i’ll get you in contact with a fantastic physical therapist! no she specializes in wolf patients. she’s great at what she does, i promise. i’ll get you a month of painkillers but over-the-counter should work alright too. take these, go to therapy, and if it’s still doing that in a month come back and we can try something else.”

- “hey, baby, look at me. i know people are staring at you. you don’t need to care about them. you have just as much right to be here as they do. just ignore them.”

- “no i’m absolutely not mad at you! you can’t control that happening! no it was a full moon what the fuck were you supposed to do? look, i can replace the couch you mauled and the TV and vases you broke but i can’t replace you getting hurt because you tried to stave off the shift. we’ll go shopping for new ones together, ok? and we’ll get some cheap shit you can break for next month and a couple steaks for you to fuck up. i promise i’m not mad- hey get off me you big lug stop fucking licking me your mouth tastes like couch cushions…”

- “it’s actually so real to be worried about hurting your human partner in bed. you won’t hurt her, dude, i’ve known her for years you should be more scared of her than she is of you. they make, like, these rings. it’s like a silicone spacer- no it goes on your dick, idiot. it’s so you don’t like fuck into her cervix or whatever. supposedly those help? idk if they come in wolf sizes though.”

show me the negative stuff, too. show me:

- werewolves who muzzle themselves in cities even though it’s only a first quarter moon because they’re scared they’ll snap and hurt someone even though that fear makes them so careful around everyone they never would

- wolves who have moon trackers on their phone because they need to know when they’re going to get forced into a shift so they can get away from everyone because they don’t want to get violent but they can’t control it and the last time they were around someone she ended up in the hospital. she’s really understanding about it and they’re friends now but it doesn’t make it feel any less horrible

- wolves who get asked every single fucking time they get nice dinner, “so do you want your steak cooked, or what?” by waiters who think they’re funny but really aren’t

- werewolves who walk on eggshells in public because they know if they make any minor mistake or show any aggression whatsoever the pundits on the news will talk about “a werewolf snarled at my kid today. i mean i try to be trusting but you never know with those people. they have those fangs for a reason is all i’m saying.”

- werewolves who are scared to shift in public for the same reason as above, because they know how they’ll be perceived if they show people they’re a wolf

- werewolves who can’t find wolf doctors in their area so they keep going back to human doctors who don’t know how the fuck to treat their unique health conditions and when they complain about this they get a flippant “have you tried a veterinarian?”

- werewolves in therapy because their last relationship was with a human who sucked and it was really bad and that trauma has manifested as resource guarding and reactivity issues and it’s causing problems at work

i love this stuff. i want more. i also cannot write conclusion paragraphs to save my life so this is the end now. thanks for reading all this if you’re reading this.

😊

[rhinocio]

NOW WITH PODFIC ACCOMPANIMENT!

[tastesoftamriel]

Are there any accommodations for people with disabilities? For example, accessible entrances for those who require mobility aids? I would assume there would be a lot of injuries from the war or at the very least from wandering monsters.

In terms of physical disabilities, there are a wide range of accommodations for helping the disabled! Accessible entrances to most shops, temples, and homes are just the beginning.

Hearing aids for the partially deaf are in the form of ear trumpets, a rather crude device into which one shouts to be heard. Enchanted pocket ear trumpets magnify the sound further, using soul gem magic to power a Dwemer-inspired... actually, I'm not even going to pretend I know how magic works.

For the fully deaf and mute, sign language is fairly commonplace around Tamriel, albeit with certain regional variations. Thieves and assassins in particular are great with sign language as it allows them to communicate silently and effectively, and the trend of learning sign language across Tamriel started with those who seek to mimic the cool demeanour of a criminal. As such, it's very practical for those hard of hearing when at least one or two people in their community know sign language!

Prosthetic limbs, generally fashioned from wood, have been in popular use for hundreds of years in Tamriel and beyond. Ranging from crude stumps to finely carved realistic or ornate limbs, it is not an uncommon sight on war veterans and victims of violence, or sick amputees. Prothestic limb wearers who are skilled in magic are also able to meld their minds with their wooden parts, making them function just as well, if not better than the real thing.

While glass eyes have always been common for the blind, but aside from realistic replicas, some Tamrielic citizens have begun wearing polished gemstones instead, a trend said to have started in the Summerset Isles. For those with poor eyesight, spectacles are the most common way to correct vision without magic. ~Talviel

PS: Here's an ESO NPC (Amalien in Solitude) who uses a wheelchair!! Which I think is very cool.

[mrkida-art]

Another dwarrow moon priest. I imagine that in dwarven society, albinism has religious significance. These dwarves are believed to have souls connected to the moon itself, which some say give them mystical powers.They are born  visually impaired, but are said to be able to see into realms beyond instead. 

Their skin is extra sensitive to sunlight, so they rarely leave the mountains during daytime without protective gear. This has created the belief that they are bound to the night sky itself.   They are highly revered and many of them become religious figureheads because of this. They are also regarded as highly attractive marriage candidates for royal marriages, this has led to some royal families having a genetic disposition to albinism. Blacklock dwarves of royal blood are especially prone to being born with the condition, which is seen as an indication of their strong connection to the celestial bodies 

[cy-cyborg-draws]

More Voidstar Lore: The Tabiri

The Tabiri are an entirely space-faring group of Kepek, living aboard a group of roaming colony ships collectively called The Tabiren. The Tabiri claim that they were the first Kepek to reach the stars and are responsible for setting the species on course to become the galaxy-spanning empire they are today.

The Tabiri are rather rigid in how they view the world, and are generally not keen on change in really any capacity. Because of this, those who don't conform often end up leaving The Tabiren in adulthood, which was the case for Wev (one of Voidstar's protagonists).

The particular Tabiri Kepek depicted here is Nera, a consistent... presence in Wev's life, no mater how far from the Tabiren she seems to travel.

[ID: An illustration of a large blue alien with four arms though three of them are behind her back, two legs and a long tail. He has a long snout, 4 eyes and two long, rabbit-like ears. She has bright yellow spots and is wearing dark blue clothing consisting of a loose, long-sleeved shirt and vest, long pants and a long skirt-like coat-tails. /End ID]

[concerningwolves]

Hi! 👋🏼

First off, I just wanted to thank you for all that you do on your blog, not only has it been helpful to keep things in mind when writing, but I also genuinely enjoy learning more about sign language; I’m trying to self-learn it because it’s just that interesting to me hehe. (Also my church has a Deaf Service and I’d really like to be able to talk to the people there.)

I do have a question, but feel free not to answer; I’m currently working on a story where a very young child has acquired deafness after a severe illness (vaguely Hellen Keller vibes), and I was wondering if you know of any things I should specifically keep in mind when writing about the aftermath (immediate and long-term) of it? The setting is mildly fantasy where sign language exists, but hearing aids and cochlear implants have yet to be invented.

Thank you again for your blog, and the care you put into all your posts!

You're very welcome, and thank you! ☺️ It's always lovely to hear that people are helped by this whole... [insert vague hand-wave at my blog] thing I'm doing

Things to consider with a young character who loses hearing after illness

I don't know anything firsthand about what it's like to go deaf, so the first thing I'll recommend is to find stuff written by people who do. A search on r/deaf for "lost hearing" brings up a lot of different threads; for example, this post where people discuss things they wished they'd done/known when they first lost their hearing might provide some good insight.

As another starting point, Jessica Kellgren-Fozard has a fair few videos on her channel about her experiences as a deaf person, and specifically as someone who lost her hearing in her late teens. These two in particular might be helpful to you:

So You're Losing Your Hearing...

This is a video for people who think they're losing their hearing, but while it's not strictly about lived experience, it could certainly be helpful to note both the issues Jessica discusses and the solutions to them.

For example, she mentions isolation is a big problem, and talks about the importance of using the tools provided by the internet to find communities of people in the same boat. Even without the internet (or some fantasy equivalent), people are very community driven and prone to bonding over shared experiences, even if those experiences aren't wholly analogous. Are there other disabled characters in your story that your recently deaf character could speak to? Other d/Deaf characters? Who does she have by way of support and community? – these are all good things to think about.

Why I Don't Sound Deaf

In this one, Jessica talks about her experiences and her relationship with speech and sign languages as someone who lost her hearing. With applying this to your character, her age is important – the "golden period" for acquisition of a new language is typically thought to be before ten years old. Theoretically, the younger someone is when they lose hearing, the easier it will be for them to learn sign language. As Jessica points out in the video, sign language has a different grammatical structure, and because of this she finds it easier to use Sign Supported English instead of BSL. A much younger child, if given immediate or near-immediate access to sign language, is likely to take to it far more easily.

More on speech and language acquisition (or: the evils of consonants)

The impact of hearing loss on speech isn't something I can speak to (pun unintended) with great knowledge or certainty, but I can sort of extrapolate based on personal experience with learning to speak while not being able to hear well. (I had speech therapy, but that was as much to do with my narrow jaw + teeth overcrowding as with language difficulties caused by deafness). I misheard a lot of words and phrases – I spent years thinking that the "big girl swings" were "barbecue swings" 😅

It's worth looking into what level of speech your character would have based on her age, and using that to work out how much verbal proficiency she could retain (if any). Muscle memory accounts for a lot, so if your character already knows how to say certain words or phrases ""properly"", she could retain that ability. It's not an automatic or effort-free process, though: I'm in my twenties and I still have to consciously think about how my mouth is shaping sounds every time I speak. I don't think that will ever change.

If your character is young enough that she's still learning to speak, there will likely be a more marked impact on how her voice sounds. Different phonemes – units or "parts" of sound in speech – are uttered at different frequencies, which affects how easy/difficult they are to hear and therefore learn. This is, AFAIK, one of the biggest causes of the slurred/indistinct speech that people tend to expect d/Deaf people to have. Consonants are evil little fuckers, by which I mean they're spoken at higher pitches so anyone with loss in the high frequency range (hi!) is more likely to miss them. There are different types of consonants, too! And yes, each type presents its own challenges, because consonants exist purely to vex and frustrate everyone with high-frequency hearing loss and/or speech difficulties. For example, labiodental fricatives (e.g., the 'f' in fan and the 'v' in van) are particularly tricky, because they sound virtually indistinguishable.

StudySmarter has an easy-to-understand comprehensive breakdown of phonetics. You don't need to become an expert in phonetics, but reading through this will help you understand how sounds are formed in speech, which is helpful to keep in mind when thinking about your own character's speech. Pay particular attention to the phonemes that sound similar (like the aforementioned fan/van) or are soft/breathy (like the 's' in 'sound' or 'h' in 'half') – these are the most common problem areas, as are distinctions between 'sh' and 's'. If they feel soft or breathy in your mouth, they're probably going to be harder to hear.

Deafness and illness as trauma, and adjusting to change

Last thing I'd suggest thinking about is the experience your character has with the illness itself, and how she feels and copes with the changes to her life caused by acquired deafness. Illness can be a traumatic experience, especially when it has long-term after effects. If you've ever lost the ability to do something you can usually do, even temporarily, you'll probably be familiar with the frustration, and sometimes humiliation. It's also hard to overstate just how much auditory information there is in the world, and how much hearing people rely on that information without knowing it. Suddenly losing that ability isn't going to be easy, even if your character is young enough that they won't be able to remember anything different once they're grown up. Add to that the realisation that your body isn't as reliable as you thought it would be, that you suddenly can't trust your own health, and possibly not being able to understand why that's the case. That's a lot to deal with! And you shouldn't be afraid to show your character going through it!

Thinking back to my own childhood experiences, the strongest emotions connected to my deafness are confusion, embarrassment and alienation. Confusion because the world can be confusing when you're constantly missing auditory cues; embarrassment because unfortunately not everyone is kind and accommodating when you make mistakes due to missing aforementioned auditory cues/information (and sometimes even if people are lovely about a mistake, you can feel stupid for making it anyway); and alienation because of a sense that I was somehow "different". Thing is though, this was normal for me. I have never known anything different. But my relationship to and understanding of deafness as an identity has evolved hugely throughout my life. So, once again, age is going to be a deciding factor in how your character adjusts.

From some rudimentary googling and fuzzy memories of my brief stint as a Psychology student, children develop social awareness (awareness of how others think and feel) and self-awareness (awareness of own existence and how others perceive you) fairly early on, but these awarenesses take time to develop fully. Basically, this means that your character’s age will influence the scope of their reaction to acquired deafness. Some examples as a frame of reference:

A two-year-old is going to be primarily focused on their immediate emotional experience – they can’t hear things they could hear before, it’s confusing. They will also likely be aware if people treat them differently, but unlikely to have a socially-installed idea that they are now different.

A four- or five-year-old, on the other hand, has probably developed enough social and self-awareness to understand that certain people in society get treated differently. They might already have a sense that this is unfair, or they might still be trying to understand why this is the case – it depends on what they’ve learned about disability from adults around them.

(I mentioned above that you can feel stupid/embarrassed for making a mistake even if people are genuinely supportive regardless. The first time I vividly remember someone making me feel stupid and embarrassed for not hearing something, I would have been 4 or 5. The first time I can recall feeling stupid because I was aware that other people didn’t have that problem and that I’d made a social faux pas, I would have been about 7 or 8)

By early adolescence (ages 10–13), children are more aware of, and possibly more susceptible to, peer pressure and social norms [1]. Any understanding of and biases/prejudices concerning disability will be more deeply ingrained, as will concerns about the social impact of going deaf.

The support network that your character has access to is going to be crucial to how they manage this change at any age, so think about the characters in their immediate family/community and how they’ve acted towards disability and social difference.

[1] In a fantasy setting, you as the author are in charge of what those social norms and attitudes are, and I always encourage authors to examine their own biases when worldbuilding them. How are disabled people viewed and treated in your world? Have you made it similar to your own social and cultural experience? If yes, is that because you see that as the norm, or is there a narrative or worldbuilding reason for that? Are there any assumptions about the current or historical treatment/existence of disabled people that have influenced your worldbuilding?

Tropes to watch out for

There are three main tropes to be wary of when a character acquires a disability of any kind:

The acquired disability as an inherent tragedy akin to a death sentence and nothing else. As I’ve already said, an acquired disability can be significantly emotionally difficult, especially if the circumstances around acquisition were traumatic. Acknowledging and exploring this is important. The problem is when writers leave it there – the character is disabled, their previous way of life is lost to them, and therefore the character no longer has any worth to the story (and, by implication, to society). Think of the trope of the ex-athlete (or any other hobby/profession, although fighters and athletes are the most common components off this trope) who acquires a disability and then becomes a bitter, depressed hermit who lives in a state of misanthropy and misery because their life is effectively over. (This happens to Will in Me Before You by Jojo Moyes. Content warning for assisted suicide there). The main issue with this trope isn’t its content, per se, but its execution: Writers rarely examine why someone might end up like this (hint: institutional and internalised ableism, and lack of structural support for disabled people), and instead treat it as an inevitability because they cannot conceive of disabled existence as anything but inherently miserable.

The second trope is when a character manages to “throw off” the disability. These characters either only remain disabled as long as the disability is narratively useful, are magically cured, or overcome the disability by an act of willpower (sometimes only for narrative effect). The issue here is the content: the idea that disability can be overcome or cured by sheer willpower (or yoga, or the right diet, or religion) is pervasive and actively harmful to real-life disabled people, because it implies that disability is somehow our fault. Closely related to this trope is the one where an acquired disability never tangibly impacts a character (or only does so when it would be dramatic); you see this primarily with characters who use prosthetics effortlessly or, in the case of the latter, characters who appear abled until their disability can cause tension or drama in the plot. Again, the content is the issue: disability is flattened to nothing but a plot device, with no thought given to how it affects characters (and therefore real disabled people).

Finally, there’s the idea that an acquired disability is actually a “blessing in disguise” as a type of inspiration porn. That’s an icky trope, but I think it has some itty bitty grains of potential – crucially, the fact that there can be joy in disabled existence. Someone who acquires deafness might not see it as a blessing in the same way as some congenitally deaf people do, but they may still come to appreciate and embrace (aspects of) Deaf culture. Or perhaps they just manage to develop a neutral relationship with their acquired deafness. That’s fine, too!

A solution is to all of these is to consider the practical and proactive aspects of recovery, as well as the emotional fallout. Consider:

How does your character adjust?

How do the people around her adjust?

What support does she have? / What support systems are available?

How does she make sense of her new reality?

What accessibility aids does she have access to, and what are they like to use?

Long story short, nuance and consideration of different aspects of the disabled experience are key.

Hopefully this’ll help! (I’ve also wanted to talk about acquired disability in fiction for a while, hence the wall of text lol). Best wishes for your writing, anon ☺️

[pyrriax]

your centurion anatomy sounds really cool :0! can you describe more in detail about them?

in your screenshot it stated they have a crystalline star in their hearts, does this have something to do with the seraphim? also by "tainted by gold" does that mean centurion blood or do seraphim also have gold blood? what are the different colors of centurion blood and are they all some matter of metallic? how do centurions connect to their seraphim?

you can also talk about seraphim anatomy if you want :3 (im also very curious about why they went extinct but im guessing thats spoilers)

also who are the other centurions and seraphim aside from clown and branzy? do they have some kind of hierarchal system? how do seraphim give their souls to creations since im assuming its literal? and what is the exact purpose of soul-sharing?

no need to answer all or any of these ofc just curious :3

Hello hello yes of course! I'm happy to elaborate more on them ^_^ I'll be pulling pieces from my notes, some screenshots of writing I've done relating to it, and just going into some Details.

(Fair warning this is going to be a LOT of words and a lot of this is subject to change, this project and world is a work in progress and I've been shifting things around as I start actually writing things!)

Preface (A quick rundown of the World itself)

Divided into two parts, the main one I'll be focusing on is The Vesper, Vesper is the name of the main Seraph city, and is also used to refer to the floating islands which are the main home of the Seraphs.

The other part of the world, The Fray, is the actual planet. This is the ground, and was once a lush place, but is currently... Not so much. Once upon a time, it had a handful of different names, but now it's nothing more than ruin.

So, Seraph anatomy (What the hell even is a Seraph?)

Seraphs are an organic bipedal species which are humanoid in nature but tend toward being less human in appearance; though one of the main differences is their many (varying number) of wings, along with having anywhere from two to four eyes. Though, all of these things variy from Seraph to Seraph! In general, they're a bit bird-ish, and though the main two that I'll be talking about look relatively similar, Seraphs have a wide variety of colors and patterns, along with the fact they're known to dye feathers the same as people dye their hair!

(Note: this is an older sketch, before I'd really fleshed out the exact origin of Seraphs. The halo isn't a standard thing, but this does somewhat convey general anatomy! This is a Seraph which is basically showing off what it is, and taking a less strictly humanoid appearance, though it remains bipedal. As well, this is a four-winged example, although its ears are feathered, which can give the appearance of an additional set of wings, depending on the Seraph!)

Generally speaking, Seraphim anatomy isn't too out of the ordinary, although one thing to note is their speech is much more adapted toward chirping and trilling for vocalizations, and most of what I write for the dialogue is more... A transcript of the conversation, than the literal things being said (since I'm already in deep with a worldbuilding project and I don't need to add a conlang on top of that, lol). Well, that's all bar the star in the room, but we'll circle around to that in the next section!

Long before they were known as the Seraphim, Seraphs were a flying creature, and have retained a few key aspects of that, specifically the wings themselves, and a lighter skeleton. This does lead to the high potential of bones breaking, and general injuries, but there are things that circumvent that from being such an issue, which is tied to magic in the world itself.

also by "tainted by gold" does that mean centurion blood or do seraphim also have gold blood?

That line is referring to Seraphim blood! Seraphs have a varied blood color, but the most common one is gold/brass-like, which is usually vibrant but when dried it's much more weathered looking (taking on a greenish hue).

Seraphs are one of two sentient species in their world, and are revered as Gods both for their appearance, and for their abilities. Although, this doesn't mean that they are peaceful, and they often will partake in bloody fights, often to perceived death. Though, these are frowned upon, it isn't outright disallowed, for reasons I'll be getting into! (I swear I'm not dragging this out on purpose I just want to explain what the fuck a Centurion is before we get into magic)

Okay, so what is a Centurion, then? (Centurion Anatomy)

Centurions are primarily humanoid in appearance, but an important distinction to make is that Centurions are not organic. In place of faces, Centurions have masks, which are typically undecorated, left blank to ensure they aren't viewed as expressive or of having emotions. There are few exceptions to this. As well, they typically will have all of their body completely covered, for similar reasons. It's established already in the screenshot you mentioned that Centurions are constructs, and generally speaking, they are made for temporary usage, rather than anything long term. This comes with the nature of their primary purpose, but let's put a pin in that for now.

Despite their status as constructs, they are given pieces which function much like their organs, which primarily exist to be like a siphon for energy and the magic which fuels them. Over time, these pieces wear down, and they will cease to function properly after their designated time is up. This time can be extended, if these pieces are replaced or maintained, but this is something that they cannot do themselves. It was a limitation put into place by their creators to keep them from self-perpetuating and as well to keep them from outliving their usefulness.

These organs appear like they've been made of wood, metal, and wool. This isn't exactly the case, as much of what makes them up is organic material, specifically that of grown stars. (There's worldbuilding and flora explanation I'm not going to drag this out with, but if you're curious I can talk about it more ^_^)

Centurions are nothing more than machines. Or, at least, that's how they were supposed to be, but this isn't how it always remains.

what are the different colors of centurion blood and are they all some matter of metallic?

Centurions have blood much more like humans, though not always. Being variably red or gold, depending on their function. While they are constructs and don't have so much of a need for a circulatory system, this is a bit more... Cosmetic. Centurions with gold blood are more often than not the ones that are made for jobs within Seraphim cities, though this doesn't mean that they always remain there. Although, in rare cases, Centurions may be made without any blood, and instead their organs will be made to replace the few functions it does have.

But, focusing on if all of their blood is metallic, it isn't always the case. Centurions are much more varied, and even from one to another major pieces of anatomy can be wildly different. So, it isn't a far stretch to say there's quite possibly a handful of Centurions with non-metallic blood out there.

Centurion Origins & Purpose (With a little sprinkling of magic!)

So, if you hadn't already guessed it, Centurions were created by the Seraphim! At the beginning, Centurions were made to fill in odd jobs, taking care of things which were necessary and being generally a stand in for workers as the Seraphs progressed. They were modeled after the other sentient species, which are functionally humans but not quite. This was something which caused a fair bit of outrage from them, but the Seraphs didn't exactly care.

Eventually, though, the Centurions took on a much different, and much more... Important role. They took the place of Seraphs in slaughter, in petty squabbles or fights which would've otherwise been an inconvenience. This turned into Centurions no longer being made for small jobs, and instead they were being made as machines of war. They were mindless and soulless soldiers, following orders without a doubt or question.

Although, some Centurions are different from the others: they have a soul, one of the stars. These are the main leaders, and they are the ones which remain for the longest. (This is what Clown is, which is the reason he is the way he is!)

Centurions made for fighting are the only remaining residents of the Fray, and have been the reason for its destruction, after the fall of the Seraphs.

Stars, Magic, all those little things (An some creature details)

Magic in Seraphim is an innate thing, something that everything in the world possesses, but uses in different ways. Some creatures use it for shapeshifting to quickly adapt, others will use it to hunt, meanwhile a handful of species will consume it rather than hunting or scavenging. Although, creatures which consume magic are known to be short lived, and reproduce a lot like how puffball mushrooms do. It's a little horrifying when all of the sudden there are sharp spores flying everywhere, but it's the reason most avoid the main pools of the magic. Seraphs are a species which primarily consume magic, but, unlike the much more nudibranch-esque creatures which are prone to exploding due to the magic they consume, Seraphs have harnessed it for their own purposes.

The Vesper are floating islands which are suspended above vast lakes (which are almost oceanic) and have been held there by the Seraphim. As a means of storing the excess energy they've taken in, they developed a way to use it to continue to suspend the Vesper. These stores could last for several thousand years, assuming they're properly maintained.

But, onto the burning question of the night: what are those stars?

in your screenshot it stated they have a crystalline star in their hearts, does this have something to do with the seraphim?

The star is a key part of the Seraph's anatomy, and is the place where magic tends to remain within their bodies. This is a piece of their heart, the place where their soul resides, and is also their tie to this Godhood they have. Much of the reason they're revered as gods it due to the fact that if the star remains in place, and remains unbroken, it can make them... Somewhat immortal. It greatly heightens their ability to heal, a little like a regeneration potion, if you think about it.

Seraphs are notoriously hard to kill for this reason, given the fact that if given enough time, they're known to be able to sort of regenerate limbs. Not perfectly, and not without several years of time and a high risk of infection, but it's possible. And that's because of the stars. They're almost entities in and of themselves, keeping the Seraphs alive to not die themselves. Although, these stars can survive in other bodies, most notably being placed into Centurions.

So how do you kill the supposedly unkillable, then? What could cause such a mass-dying if they can regenerate?

The easiest and most straightforward way to kill a Seraph is to rip out their star. Although, that involves incapacitating them to some degree (usually via fatally wounding them, as that's generally the most accepted method. This is why it's so greatly frowned upon, as that leaves the Seraph who's been wounded to most likely be killed.) It's recognizable for its shape, which is the origin of its name (for a more visual reference, they're a little like konpeitō, but with a spikier appearance), and though they have varying tones, they're more often than not a pearlescent white. At least, that's when they've been cleaned of blood.

Without their star, the Seraph will die. Even if they we're fatally wounded prior, they will only survive a handful of months at most.

So, this mass dying. While I won't go into all of the details, since that definitely spoils some things, but magic is a finite resource, but even more, Seraphim stars became... Valuable as a weapon. Without the proper maintenance and constant in and out flow of magic, they'll accumulate energy, storing more and more until finally they just explode. Much like the nudibranchs, an excess of this magical energy leads to explosive properties.

This also means that Seraph corpses are dangerous if the stars haven't been removed, which is why in the carnage, there aren't many bodies left to lie and rot. The few Centurions remaining in places like the Vesper cleaned the place of these bodies, and some even took the stars for themselves.

So what do the stars have to do with souls?

In an earlier draft of a concept, I detailed a Seraph getting decapitated and surviving due to its star. The stars are a place where the Seraph's memory, personage, and in the most fantastical sense, their soul, is stored. This Seraph lives, and while it never quite has the same senses as it did before, it is still fundamentally the same person, as its star wasn't harmed in the process.

So; for a Seraph to give a Centurion its soul, that is an act like giving up itself to that Centurion. The Seraph will not exist in the same sense, and as shown with Clown and Branzy, even that will diminish over time.

Although, there is one thing I've avoided mentioning: the humans. Our outliers, as one of the least magically inclined species, they've tried to get ahold of this magic, as well as attempting to use the Seraph's stars for their own. This lead to a few people who've remained, but aren't quite human anymore.

how do seraphim give their souls to creations since im assuming its literal? and what is the exact purpose of soul-sharing?

Seraphim can take out their own star, an act which is painful but to be done for another is a little bit of a profession of love. To give their star to a Centurion, under regular circumstances, it is a way of prolonging the life of their soul. The star is "consumed", a thing which is looked down upon by Centurions, as it's viewed as becoming one with those who've condemned them to their hellish lives.

There are two things that can come of a Seraph's soul being placed into a Centurion, and they go as follows, with few exceptions:

The Centurion is Soulless / a Husk: The soul will continue to live on, but they will start again. It removes all but a few traces of the Seraph's memories, and they will learn to live as they now are. [Example: Ro, who we'll learn more about in the next section]

The Centurion has a Soul / Star (Even if it is one that was grown / artificial): The pre-existing soul will be slowly consumed by the Seraph's, a process which results in one or both of the stars shattering. This can only happen is the Centurion has agreed to it, and it is a thing which became more common as more Seraphs died. [Example: Clown, whose visions of shattering stars are that of his own, and not Branzy's]

Last but not least, an incomplete list of character I've given story to for this AU

Starting with our Seraphim:

Branzy is the most notable as he's the only Seraph who remains a Seraph for his entire existence, even after giving his soul to Clown. Although he's used his magic for shapeshifting purposes, appearing much more akin to the Centurions, as he's been enthralled by them since he was young. Roshambo, although I'll be elaborating more on him in the Centurion section for a few reasons. He was one of the first Seraphs to give his soul to a Centurion, and it had some... Interesting effects.

Onto the Centurions:

Clown is the obvious one, being one of the most perfect example of what makes a Centurion, and being one of the "leaders", his star (his soul) is artificial, one of the ones which was grown, and thus, he's a bit different from Seraph-souled (or, star-eating) Centurions. [Appears a lot like his typical canon appearance, as he was one of the few Centurions who were directly associated with a Seraph, and despite the fact of his origin, he doesn't have the blank mask which is typical of these Centurions. His mask is also carved into a shape which is much more like a horned owl, a little heart-ish; this doesn't affect him.] Zam, a lovely odd case who shows up long after the fall of the Seraphs, but before the Vesper as a whole collapses, who becomes one of the residents of the Vesper's grand library [At least at his introduction, Zam is much like the typical soldier Centurion, dressed in a way which is very impersonal. This changes as he spends time in the library, and by the time of the fall, he's adopted a palette of darker amber hues and white, along with the occasional gold or brass accent. While his mask remained generic for a long time, he eventually allowed Ro to help with adorning it, ending up with a smile and some filigree which matches Ro's own mask.] Roshambo is the last on this list as of currently; although he's fully convinced he isn't a Centurion at all, having been around the other residents of the library since his creation and not knowing himself to be any different from them [Previously being one of the few Centurions who was designated to a space where he would be viewed, Ro is dressed in a way which is almost painfully fancy for him. Unlike the typical blank white, the base color of Ro's mask is an iridescent black, adorned with lavender stripes and laurel patterns. His appearance is a little less decided, compared to the others.]

And last but not least, our... Humans?:

Mapicc is the closest to a normal human of those given one of the Seraph-souls in order to grant him the almost-immortality, this has lead to him having several inhuman traits, including the appearance of seasonally shed feathers, which he's more annoyed by than anything. Spoke is about the furthest from human someone can get while still being so, and this is because of the fact of the star he was given. He was given one of the artificial stars, as a part of a test. He's only become more... Bizarre as time goes on, body twisting and morphing as the magic doesn't know where to go, and he can't fully contain or control it.

The roster is pretty small, since I've been focusing on two different eras, and these two sets don't interact much. Clown and Branzy exist long before the extinction of Seraphs, but Branzy's giving up of his heart does mark the true beginning of the end. Roshambo, Mapicc, and Spoke (later as well including Zam) are the last living beings on the Vesper after the fall of the Seraphs, and are there until the day the sun doesn't set, and the Vesper itself falls from the sky.

... So that's the world of Seraphim, from relative start to end, with much of the fluff, character centric pieces and a bit of the more out-there magical elements cut out to save my damn hands because this is almost 3k words 👍 There are things I'm not sure will remain canon, more proper worldbuilding and flora / fauna exploration I need to work on, and some things I most definitely missed, but hopefully this answers some questions and raises others! there is a lot more to explore post-fall but i have to leave a couple of mysteries, as a treat.

[capricorn-0mnikorn]

I honestly keep backing out on making wheelchair users in my writing because I keep getting nervous that they're out of place or will seem stupid or something because a wheelchair in a fantasy setting? Pfft ridiculous so thank you for having so much stuff about disabled people in fiction. It kinda helps me work through my weirdness about everything (I'm a wheelchair user so I think a lot of it boils down to my own insecurity) and now I have a dragon with a wheelchair-like-thing and am having a time developing all the accomodations for disabled dragons in my world. I'd argue it's actually made the whole process FUNNER!

Sorry if this is weird or stupid or even irritating I just wanted to share how you're helping and making my experience, at least, better

Irritating?! Quite the opposite! This made my day, Nonny!

Truth be told, It also took me a long time to embrace including disabled people in my stories. I rationalized to myself that this was because I didn't want to be pigeon-holed by Abled people's expectations of me (that because of the saying "Write what you know," all I could write were disabled characters).

But after I started getting involved in the online Disability Community, my thinking started to shift on this almost without my noticing, And I realized that all that time in the past, I was basing my characters and stories on the people I saw around me, and not myself... And all through school, from Kindergarten to University, I was (usually) the only visibly disabled person in class (though by the time I got to grad school, we did have a disabled students' quasi-club, but we were all in different majors.

So, yes. Representation matters. Thanks for adding to it.

[cy-cyborg]

What kind of worldbuilding would you expect from a world where amputation is really common? (NOT a cyberpunk thing. The technology is somewhere between Bronze Age and Middle Ages, which I know is really broad but I’m indecisive). Also the most common cause of amputation is disease, not war or anything like that, in case it makes a difference. So far all I’ve come up with is that assistive technology isn’t limited to more urban/populated areas, and people treat amputations as commonplace. Sorry if this is too random

Ok, so my answer to this will depend of what kind of tone you want. Do you want it to be normalised in a more idealist/optimistic way, or do you want to do worldbuilding around the new problems that would likely arise and take a more pessimistic approach? Either way there's a lot you can do with a setting like that and I absolutely love world building stuff like this! I was actually working on another post kind of similar to what you're asking for, so I have a lot prepared lol. apologies for the long post in advance.

Here are some questions/suggestions I would consider:

What are the views around Amputation in this setting? Do any stereotypes or beliefs appear around it?

Just because a disability is common, doesn't always mean it's accepted, or accepted unconditionally, nor does it mean people won't make odd assumptions about it. Obviously, if you want something more optimistic, you'll want to go with "it's just a normal part of life, most folks don't really think about it much" but in that case, even accepted disabilities get weird assumptions, stereotypes or even religious beliefs surrounding them. The best example of this in the real world is people who wear glasses. Most folks wouldn't even consider it a disability because it's just so normalised, but it is - glasses are a type of accessibility device. But what comes to mind when you think of someone who wears glasses? Chances are, it's someone smart, maybe a nerd? Glasses have nothing to do with intelligence but we associate people who wear them with it anyway. From what I found, that association formed in the middle ages, as monks and priests wore them to read, and those were people who studied religious texts and passed that information to the public. the common folk saw these people as a source of information and wisdom, forming the idea that glasses were worn by intelligent or wise people. If amputation is common and/or accepted, this kind of thing will probably happen with it too. If amputations are more common in some lines of work than others (either because that job leads to more amputations, or because a lot of people go into that line of work after their amputation) people will start to associate qualities needed for that job with amputees. For example, If the most common reason for amputation is illness, and if that illness is contagious, you might actually end up with a similar belief, that amputation is a sign of intelligence because doctors/healers, who people view as intelligent, are more likely to catch the illness, resulting in more amputations among doctors.

On the flip side, a lot of cultures have disabilities at the heart of many of their beliefs. For example, they idea of the fey replacing children with other fey, is thought to have been people's way of explaining neurodivergence like autism, ADHD and personality disorders before we had words for those disabilities.

Likewise, some European Christians believed people born with disabilities (including limb differences) could be explained by their mothers participating in witchcraft or deals with the devil. These disabilities were pretty common at the time due to malnutrition and a general lack of understanding about how to be safe while pregnant, but they lacked the medical knowledge to be able to explain it, and so superstition took over. If your setting has a similar level of medical knowledge/understanding, something similar might occur. Not every example of this is negative btw. It's thought that early ancient Egyptians believed disabilities such as blindness, especially if it was from birth, were the result of the gods calling them to speak for them. Similar lack of understanding about where the disability came from but this time it has a much more positive outcome.

Also, consider that if it's so normalised, people are going to be much less likely to be afraid of becoming amputees. This can be a positive thing, but it could have run on effects, both in the sense that people are less likely to care to take precautions to avoid things that could result in amputation, and that people may underestimate the impact it will have. Even in the real world, as being an amputee has become less stigmatised (though we are still far from normalised), some people have started underestimating how it will impact you. My prosthetist says the hardest part of his job is watching the realisation that a prosthetic won't be a magic cure hit his patients in real-time. this isn't to say being an amputee is always a terrible and awful and all the other things people think about disability, but it is a BIG adjustment that a lot of folks are unprepared for. In a setting where it's even more common, this is even more likely. It's also more likely that non-amputees will underestimate this impact, and say things like "but I know someone with the same amputation and they're fine!" when someone tries to say they can't/struggle to do something because of their amputation - something that also already happens to me irl lol. People are going to take to being amputees differently, they'll have different limits and different capabilities, how well does your society as a whole understand this?

Finally, think about if there are certain types of amputations that are more accepted/normalised/understood than others. In the real world, leg amputees tend to be more accepted than arm amputees in my experience, and larger amputations/multi-limb amputations carry more stigma and have a lot more bizarre misinformation and stereotypes about them. Is this the same for your world?

What is the general populations view of other disabilities?

Just because one disability is more common or accepted, doesn't mean they all are. This is especially important to consider for comorbid disabilities (disabilities that are connected to, are caused by having, or are usually seen alongside being an amputee). For example, a lot of leg amputees choose wheelchairs over prosthetics, but the degree of acceptance for that in your world will depend on people's view of wheelchair users as a whole. In real life, it's an unfortunate reality that the use of a wheelchair is looked down on and there are a lot of negative stereotypes about wheelchair users which deters a lot of leg amputees from using a wheelchair, even when they really need one. When leg amputees specifically use wheelchairs, we are often said to be giving up or even lazy for not "pushing through" or "trying hard enough" - I have another post here talking about that. This has resulted in a lot of amputee-specific spaces being completely inaccessible wheelchair users. An example of this would be a camp I used to attend specifically for amputees being held in a non-wheelchair accessible location until recently, or amputee clinics (where you go to see doctors who specialise in treating/rehabilitating amputees) having equipment needed for taking measurements essential for getting quality prosthetics, being unusable to people who can't stand up. If they do accept other related disabilities though, there's more stuff to think about (which I'll come back to in the next few points)

Of course, how your world views unrelated disabilities is important to consider too, because chances are there's someone out there with both. How does the general view of disability affect those people? Are people more or less likely to accept that having this other disability means they won't be able to things other amputees can? I'm autistic for example and find it nearly impossible to wear my prosthetic when I'm in burnout, both because it's a lot of energy I don't really have, but also because when I'm in burnout, I'm very sensitive to certain textures, and the feeling of wearing my prosthetics when I'm like that is unbearably uncomfortable.

What has the acceptance/normalisation of amputees done to influence beauty standards?

You see this a lot in cyberpunk but it's worth considering for other settings too. Amputation can be a very visible disability if you want it to be, but in the real world, there is a big emphasis on "looking normal" because beauty standards. This isn't just a modern thing either, there are many stories of real-life knights who lost arms during battle and had armour made for them that hid their missing limb. They were functionally useless (except for maybe backhanding people lol) but the desire to look "normal" outweighed the need for functionality to many.

If amputation is common though, this might not be the case in your setting. This might mean people are freer to explore prosthetics that put function over aesthetics, meaning they might have more advanced prosthetics than you'd typically expect to see in that time period. Alternatively, it might go the other way and you could end up with people who still favour aesthetics over function, but they try to make it look as outlandish and unique as possible.

Beyond how it effects amputees though, if prosthetics are seen as fashionable, do non-amputees try to mimic the look of prosthetics in their outfits? Consider the first point I mentioned here too. If there are certain desirable characteristics associated with amputees, would people trying to present themselves a certain way try to make it look like they're an amputee, even when they are not? Kind of like how people wear fake glasses to look smart or just as an accessory. Alternatively, how dose being an amputee play other beauty standards and expectations? Another real-world example, is that there is a lot of fatphobia in amputee circles, to the point where most teenaged amputees I know have/had eating disorders. Part of it comes from the general fatphobia in the wider population, but its amplified by the fact that many prosthetic components have weight limits on them, and many prosthetic companies refuse to make components for bigger people, not because they can't/it's too hard, but because they say there's no demand for it. So Doctors push the importance of staying below a certain weight so their patents can have access to better tech and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. If there are a lot more amputees though, this might be different, but it's worth considering.

How will it impact architecture?

When we think of medieval or even older structures, "accessible" isn't the word we usually think of. Most buildings had stairs, and the needs of people with different bodies was rarely, if ever considered. But if amputation is more common, this might not be the case, especially if things like wheelchair use are also common/accepted (told you I'd come back to that). Buildings will be more likely to use ramps, lifts (even in ancient times - this could be achieved via pullies or something similar, though it would need to be usable to arm amputees too) or forgo multiple levels entirely where possible. Roads would probably be paved or at least smoothed to allow for easier travel via wheels and cities would be laid out in way that would make traversing them from a wheelchair easier. This would likely have a run-on effect and lead to cities being more accessible to people with horse-drawn carts, wagons, carriages etc too. things would be made with the idea that someone lower to the ground, or someone who needs to use their feet to grab things (and therefore can't reach as high) needs to be able to access the thing too, and a lot more. Even small things, like the way doors are opened might be altered to make it easier to use for someone missing an arm/who's arms are occupied with pushing a wheelchair. Making spaces more accessible in these ways also has run-on effects. I already mentioned the carriages in cities, but it also means you might start seeing small changes to the world, like chairs being made to be more comfortable, or single-handed versions of tools/weapons being more common.

What type of illness is the most common cause? How do people view it? Is it understood?

You mentioned illness is the most common cause of amputation in this setting. In that case, consider what kind of illness is usually the cause. Is it a single disease? if so, is it contagious? How high is the mortality rate? Who does it mostly impact? I lost my own legs to an illness, one that is well-known where I live, but poorly understood - most people just know it's contagious and acts kind of like the flu. This has resulted in some very bizarre interactions with non-disabled people when they find out how I lost my legs. There was a rumour about me in school that I still had the illness, and so because of that my amputations were contagious. It wasn't just children who believed it either lmao. Now as the public has been better educated, those ideas are less common, but weird stuff still comes up occasionally, like the lady who thought my illness was a government conspiracy theory made up to control people and scare them into getting vaccinated, apparently my amputations were unnecessary and all a part of the plot lol. I don't know if I talked about that on this account yet but I think it's probably my favourite weird interaction lmao.

You can also look at how people reacted to COVID for ideas about how people react to wide-spread illnesses that have a high chance of disabling you. Diabetes is another good example too, while it's one of the most common causes for amputation in the real world, people are still very weird about it and a lot of people insist it either doesn't exist or can be treated without medicine (insulin). Does the disease in your world have a lot of untrue information about it too? are there people peddling fake "cures" to take advantage of people who are more at risk?

How has this impacted Medicine as a whole

In medicine, advancements in one field are rarely isolated. When advancements are made in one area, other areas usually follow or are at least influenced. As much as the modern medical industry structure likes to pretend otherwise, it's all connected. In the real world, amputees were a lot rarer (not unheard of mind you, but rarer) because well, bronze-age understandings of things like infection and disease in general wasn't great. people would often die from the side effects of the amputation or the surgery itself (e.g. infections, going into shock because the surgery was preformed while the person was awake, blood loss during surgery, a general lack of understanding of how important hygiene is post-op/a lack of access to proper hygiene etc). So if amputees are more common, that would imply their understanding of medicine is at least a little better than real-life bronze age folks. This won't just stop an amputees though, like i said, it's all connected. Having a better understanding of, say, how infection happens in an amputee, means they will probably have a better understanding of infection in general, which could stop a lot of deaths in other ways. Likewise, sewing a stump closed in a way that won't cause immense amounts of nerve and phantom pain implies a decent understanding of the nervous system in general, which will have run on effects in how a lot of other conditions can be viewed and maybe even treated.

Conclusion

There's a lot more you could consider, but I hope this gave you some additional stuff to think about (sorry for the long response, but like I said, I was already working on a nearly identical post so this was perfect timing lol). Let me know if you need more help, I love this kind of worldbuilding stuff! Also, just to be clear as well, as long as you aren't just ignoring the fact so much of your world is disabled or being super ableist about it, there's no right or wrong answers here. You can have more positive answers to these questions than what I've given as examples, you can go darker, you can have a mix of both, whatever you like. Depending on the tone you want, you don't even have to answer every question if you don't want to. If you have a rather light-hearted setting for example, you probably don't need to know how all your amputees are surviving infections and unmedicated amputation surgery lol, but if its a darker tone where the illness you mentioned is a central focus, then it's probably a good thing to think about at least. At the end of the day, just ensure your answers aren't based on stereotypes or misinformation and you're all good for the most part!

[alpaca-clouds]

How to make a "world" more accessible

Let's talk a bit about accessible worldbuilding. I am thinking here first about Solarpunk worlds, but also about other scifi and fantasy worlds, that often do not think about this at all. Again, there is this nasty tendency to just assume that there are no disabilities in those worlds - and it leaves disabled people often feeling left out.

One of the most basic accessibility features one would expect to see in a world would be some sorts of ramps. And don't get me started with "oh, in my world wheelchairs fly!", which is something that actually not all folks reliant on wheelchairs want - as the actual hand-moved wheelchair often gives them a certain control.

It should also be noted that ramps help not only wheelchair users, but also people with baby strollers, and folks who might use other mobility aids like rollators. Heck, in my life ramps have also helped me, when I was travelling with a large trunk. Really, ramps make life easier for a lot of folks! Heck, if we think about a solarpunk world, where hopefully a lot of folks would get around by bike, ramps would help as well.

Of course, in some cases (if feasible in the technology level) there might also be a need for some sort of elevator. Again, not only wheelchair users will make use of that.

Another thing that should help, would be a wider usage of stuff like orientation systems for blind people. Currently those things are fairly spotty. Like some places have them, other places don't. And even where they are implemented, a lot of folks do not know what they are and will walk over it and park their cars on it. Stuff like that, which will once again make stuff more dangerous and inaccessible for blind people.

Then there should more accessibility accomondations for people who are deaf or hard of hearing. Those could mean to install visual signals for warning systems, which often currently are mainly auditory. It could also mean a wider usage of stuff like subtitles if possible in the world. And it also could mean that in the world people are more encouraged to learn sign language.

But those are the obvious disabilities. The stuff folks think off first when they hear "disability".

But there are other disabilities. Personally, for example, I do have some issues with my bowels. So what would be important to me is easy access to toilets whereever I move around. Which also is to say: Yes, dear public transport. Not having a single accessible toilet in your fucking train is an accessibility issue and ableistic.

Or the one accessibility aspect that has slowly been taken away recently due to hostile architecture: Benches and other places in public to sit down on. Because a lot of folks just cannot stand/walk for a long while. This is true for old people, and recently increasingly too for folks disabled through COVID.

There is also the need for shaded areas. As there are several disabilities that do not deal well with direct sunlight. Be it people who react allergic against sunlight, be it people whose eyes cannot deal with too much light, or be it people who might just struggle with their circulation when in the direct sun for too long.

And then there is allergic people. Which is also a big chunk - and in some cases can be quite debilitating. And I might remind people: In a fantasy or scifi world there might be people allergic to some of the worldbuilding stuff. Like in the Witcher Triss is allergic against magic, and in the nice sapphic webcomic Always Human one of the two main characters is allergic against bio-implants. Hence, ideally in an accessible fantasy/scifi world it would be easy to access what kinda stuff is in a potion and what not, to allow folks to be safe.

Lastly, of course, there are neurodivergent folks and... about that I am going to talk tomorrow.

Oh, and by the way: If you are disabled and have ideas of how the world could be more accessible for you... Please feel free to add!

[whereserpentswalk]

Made this meme after realizing that four of the most prominent pcs from my motw campaign were physically disabled, and three of those were from in game injuries I gave them. (One started off the game with a facial difference from an encounter with a pyromancer she had as a kid in her backstory. The next one was defended (literally had his ears erased) by a magical axe. Another had her arm cut off in a fight with Jeff the Killer. And another lost their hand in a fight with the bbeg.)

Not wanting disabled people in ttrpgs isn't a desire for realism it's a fear of realism.

[creation-help]

Do any of your fantasy ocs have disabilities specific to them being supernatural? For example someone in a world where everyone can shapeshift, but your character can only slightly alter their form. Stuff like this, that exists as a disability only within your world's own lore.

And how are they accommodated for? (No miracle healing through magic or shit where they no longer have any symptoms, don't do that)

[whumble-beeee]

Into the Woods and Out of the Woods

The (Un)Official Guide to Hero-Keeping | Cont'd from Part 9

Content: mentioned past capture, angst, mentioned (potential) character death, child in distress (only for a second there tho)

* * * * * * * *

“In this life, you need to do everything in your power to survive and thrive. Supers aren’t allowed to thrive in this world. We're forced to hide, we're forced to serve, we're taken advantage of. If we don't comply, then we're dangerous, we’re feared, then we're subjugated, imprisoned, or killed. Just look at what they did to me because of my power, weak as it is [...] [They] made an example out of me, knowing I couldn't fight back, and time and time again it has been shown that I am not the only one. The current system needs to be dismantled and started anew. And if– when– ‘The Man’ says no? Then he must be taken down too.”

– Supervillain Aurelias “Elias” Byrne, codename “Anonym”

**Note: Danger Level Five: Any sightings of this individual should be reported to the police immediately. DO NOT INTERACT.

* * * * * * * *

[~Not long before Stan McKellen’s recapture (the events of Ch. 1)~]

"My legs hurt!" a high voice groaned from just behind Stan. He sighed deeply and simply continued walking, arms and legs burning for rest from the nonstop exertion.

"Yeah I know, mine too. But we're almost there. And you're not the one with a bad knee, you can make it."

"But you have a magic cane to help you! I just have my stupid normal legs!" Chloe stomped on the ground with each syllable to illustrate her point.

"I'm not using my magic right now, so the cane is just a cane and my leg still hurts just as much as usual,” Stan countered. “More actually. Not to mention my wrist is killing me because I didn't have time to grab my crutch. So that's just gone now, I guess."

"You should use your power to make it easier, like you do when you’re fighting. And use it on me too! Just make my legs walk for me!"

"Not happening, I don’t wanna pass out and die from exhaustion on this hill using my powers because your legs got tired."

"But I'm about to pass out and die on this hill from exhaustion because my legs got tired. You should teach me how to use my powers, then I could just do it myself.”

“Squeaks, I don't know if you noticed, but we're basically being hunted for sport because of those exact powers.”

"Chloe, you wanna ride on my back?" Marcus chimed in, exhausted from listening to his beloved fiancé and said fiancé's equally as beloved younger sister bicker back and forth. Nonstop. For the entire trip.

"Marcus, don't encourage her. We're literally almost there," Stan groaned. He actually had no idea how far they were from the 'campsite'. But Chloe didn't need to know that.

“It's fine Stan, she's tired, she's a kid, we've been walking a long time. I get it.”

“Nuh-uh!” Chloe said in an obnoxiously nasally voice.

“Nuh-uh?” Marcus questioned, at the same time Stan reflexively cracked out a “Yuh-huh!” without even knowing what the hell he was “yuh-huh"-ing.

“Nuh-uh, I'm not a kid!”

“You're thirteen actually, so you're a kid,” Marcus laughed.

“Nuh-uh, nope! Thirteen. ThirTEEN! Teen! Teenager! I'm a teenager! Not a kid!”

“You're not a teenager until you're sixteen, actually,” Stan stated, amused smile pulling lightly at the corners of his mouth.

“Sixteen is basically an adult already, you can't be basically an adult and also barely a teenager, Stan,” Chloe said matter-of-factly.

But at least she wasn't complaining about being tired anymore.

“And I am a teenager, or else why would it be thirTEEN!?”

“Well, only kids get to ride on my back,” Marcus retorted with ridiculously heightened haughtiness, nose raised and all. “So no riding on my back for you then, big teenager.”

Chloe narrowed her eyes at Marcus. “Fine, I didn't want to ride on your back anyw–!”

“AND we're here!” Stan announced cheerfully, cutting them off with a mighty huff.

And all fell silent.

Wind whistled through the branches overhead, swishing through leaves with a gentle rustle as the crunching of dirt underfoot came to a grinding halt. The chirps of birds in the distance became audible in their tentative silence, whistles and cheeps and squawks filling the air with a cheerfully chaotic melody. The smell of wet dirt and decaying leaves wafted through the cool air. 

Chloe, of course, was the first to point out the obvious. “Uh. What do you mean?… There's nothing here…”

“Except for the beautiful sounds and sights of nature!” Marcus proclaimed, spreading his arms out and spinning around as if surrounded by the beautiful rolling hills of Austria instead of… Well, the same trees they’d been passing by unheeded for the last hour.

Stan pointed at a dinky circle of rocks on the ground, a slight char to the earth scorching the center of the ring. “Fire pit. This is it.”

“Oh okay, my bad, I guess,” Chloe sarcastically raised her arms in surrender. “Didn't know that a pile of rocks passes for a campsite now.”

“Well, it's what we've got.” Stan plopped his full-to-bursting backpack into the barely-packed dirt. “Hard to be picky when you're on the run from a buncha psycho government crazies trying to torture us or whatever.”

Chloe raised her brow and tilted her head at her brother, arms crossed in that know-it-all sort of way. “Stan. Just because you got a shattered knee doesn’t mean you need to break my back by making me sleep on the best choice owl bones and sharp rocks.”

“Chloe!” Marcus' voice nearly cracked with how high it went, appalled.

“No, no, it’s fine Marcus, she didn't mean it like that,” Stan said. She was just frustrated. “Look, it’s what we got for now. I’ll try to figure out something better for tomorrow. And hey, at least it's not under a bridge or something.”

“Or some mad scientist's lab,” Marcus pointed out.

Chloe shrugged. “I'm just saying, generally it's good to find a place where you don't have to wonder if someone might’ve been burned at the stake.”

Stan had to admit, he felt that same hopeless pit in his stomach that his sister must've been feeling. This was not how he had been hoping to spend his day. Or week, month, year. In fact, he had been hoping he would never have to flee again. Sadly, sometimes it's just not written in the stars that certain people get their way. Ever, apparently.

“... hey Chlo?” Stan called. “How you holding up?” 

She pelted a rock she'd found somewhere into the endless void of the forest. “I'm fine. Wish we had like…” she gestured around, arms wide before throwing them back down to her sides.  “Walls. Or like a roof, or something.”

Ditto.

“Stan?” Marcus called from behind him. Stan quickly made his way over to his fiancé so they could talk in private, as private as you could talk in the woods when the person you're talking about is a 3-second jog away.

“What is it? What's wrong?” Stan whispered quickly.

Marcus grinned conspiratorially at him, eyes flicking around the clearing as if searching for ninjas eavesdropping to learn of his dastardly plans.

“I think it's time–” he whispered dramatically, “for Plan 'Brother-sister-bonding-by-teaching-her-how-to-use-her-powers-and-get-her-out-of-the-mood-she’s-in’.”

Stan scoffed, failing to not let an amused shine crack through features at Marcus’ ridiculousness even as a very real worry took root in his chest. “I guess it probably is time she learned. It’s just hard for her, you know how complicated her feelings are about the powers. But I suppose if no one's around out here to see it, plenty of space…”

“And hopefully it'll help her out of that funk. I can't even begin to think what must be going through her head right now…”

“I can.”

Will I ever see my friends again?

What important things did I leave behind?

Where are we gonna sleep tonight?

When is the next time I'll get the chance to eat?

What if my brother is caught?

What if we're both caught?

Will I finally get to see what mom and dad and Stan had to go through?

I thought we were finally safe.

“It's… it's bad.”

Marcus just nodded sympathetically. The silence was excruciating. 

“... but she's a tough kid, she'll make it through.” Stan finally managed to choke out. “We all will.” 

Marcus pursed his lips, thinking for a moment. “How about this: you both go train, and while you're gone, I'll go back to that convenience store we saw a couple miles back and get some supplies. Y’know, the essentials, marshmallows, some chocolate, graham crackers…”

Stan lit up like the northern lights, eyes full of stars. “S'mores night!”

“Yeah! We can use that crappy little firepit you found!”

“Oh, she would love that!” Stan whisper-shouted, nearly jumping up and down, vibrating with excitement.

Marcus’ eyes glinted. His teasing smile nearly made Stan blush. 

“She's not the only one, huh?”  He poked Stan in the stomach, and Stan nearly squealed as he jumped back out of the way, even almost managing to avenge himself by thrusting the tip of his cane into Marcus’ chest. But Marcus grabbed the cane and yanked it forward, pulling a screech from Stan before he felt Marcus’ strong body pin his arms to his sides in a tight embrace before he fell flat on his face.

“Caught you,” he teased in a sing-songy voice. “Whatcha gonna do now?”

“Oh get off it Silva!” Stan yelled as he halfheartedly shoved to try and get away, secretly wishing he could stay here forever.

Marcus let Stan go, instead grabbing his fiancé's hands in his own and squeezing them tight, looking lovingly into each other's eyes.

"We'll have a nice night tonight,” he reassured. “I know things are horrible right now… but things always get worse before they get better. And hell, they could always be worse.”

Slight flashbacks so kindly reminded Stan of the horrors. Every day away from that hellscape was another better day. 

“Things could definitely be worse.” Stan tossed his arms over Marcus’ shoulders with a cheeky grin. “ Like for example… I could be anywhere else in the world, and then I wouldn’t be with you.”

He pulled Marcus down into a soft kiss, one hand on the back of his head to gently guide him and feeling the warmth of skin against skin, Marcus’ body against his own, supporting him wholly. And in that moment, where the world was just the two of them, he let himself imagine that everything truly was okay. That they weren't being hunted down, that they hadn't just had to flee from their home again, that he wasn't alone in this world. Because he had Chloe, and he had Marcus, and he would always have them forever.

He pulled away just as he heard Chloe shout out an over-exaggerated “Ewwwww! Get a room!” From behind them. Stan rolled his eyes and pushed off of his fiancé, who was now practically giggling.

“You better get going if you want to get back before dark. Meet up in, say, three hours?” 

Marcus gave a goofy grin and started on his way back up the trail with a big thumbs up. “Will do! Be back with yummy treats soon!”

“I'll see you in a bit! I love you!”

“Love you more!”

“Are you done eating each other's faces?” Chloe yelled. “Where's he going? What's happening, what are you planning?”

Then Marcus was gone. That small pang in his heart that came around when he couldn't see those who he loved most returned again. He'd gotten used to it, but it never stung any less.

Stan ignored the questioning as he made his way over to his little sister, who was now balancing with her arms out swinging wildly, stepping around and around from rock to rock of the small ‘fire pit’.

“Hey, Chloe?”

Her gaze shot up to his, sea-foam blue eyes peering into turquoise-green. His breath caught in his throat. The words died on his tongue for a moment as he remembered all that he had done for her. To keep her safe. To try and keep her happy. The times he clutched her in his hold, held her hand, shoved her behind him, shielded her from anything that could harm her in favor of harming himself instead.

And he would keep doing that, every single time. But that didn’t mean he would always succeed, and they needed to prepare for that.

It was finally time, huh?

Chloe tilted her head at him. “Uh… Stan? Why are you looking at me like a serial killer?”

Stan startled. “Ah, right! Sorry. I just wanted to ask if you wanted to go train your powers some.”

Chloe’s eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. “Really!?” 

She jumped up as high as she could off the rocks and scrambled over to Stan. “I thought you said I couldn’t learn them because they’re dangerous!”

“I never said that!” Stan protested. “We just haven't had the chance to do it because other people want to hurt us over them. That’s why they’re dangerous. Not the power itself. Well, the power itself also can be dangerous... But you need to know it. To defend yourself. In case.”

“...in case?” Her eyebrows creased slightly.

“Uh… well, yeah, in case–”

“Boring! Let's go! I wanna learn!” Chloe interrupted a bit too quickly, grabbing Stan by the wrist and damn near tripping him flat on his face when she started to drag him toward… she didn’t even know, really. To learning powers!

“Augh! Chloe! Stop, I’m gonna trip and die and it'll be your fault!” Stan’s heart jumped into his throat and he struggled to keep his balance.

“Use your magic to fly or something,” she said giddily, though she did let up slightly on the pulling. “It's like a warm-up so you can teach me better! I bet I'll be even better at it than you!”

“Ha! In your dreams you'll be better than me!”

* * * * * * * *

Chloe was unusually quiet on their trek to find a spot to practice. Stan would say something, and then she'd brighten up for a moment, bantering and hollering as usual. But then her jaw would clench, her brows knit together. Staring into the middle distance as they walked, looking at nothing in particular. Thinking. She even ignored various cool-looking rocks and tree formations, never once trying to climb the haphazard structures.

She might be worse off than he originally thought. 

They came upon a clearing in the brush.  Flat ground, no trees or rocks in the way. 

Perfect.

“Alright, Chloe,” Stan started, startling Chloe out of her walk as he took a ready position, feet apart and grounded for a steady base, cane at the ready. No going back now. “Now I've seen you trying to use your powers without permission before and honestly, you did pretty good.”

“Nuh-uh!” She interrupted obnoxiously. 

“Yuh-huh! I've seen it!” Stan bit back without missing a beat. 

“Nuh-uh!!”

“Yuh-HUH!”

“NUH-UH!” she shouted, and Stan barely managed to block when she jumped up and tried to bap him on the top of the head.

“What are you even ‘nuh uh’-ing here?” Stan cried, accompanied by a small screech as he ducked away.

“I thought you were about to say I shouldn't have done that. But then you said something else,” Chloe shrugged.

“So you doubled down?”

A pause.

“Yesssss...”

Stan rolled his eyes. 

“You really shouldn't have used your powers, to be fair…” he considered, tapping his finger on his cane. “Especially since you know what would happen if the wrong people found out. You remember. The– the uh…”

The running.

The raids.

The people in the armored vests.

The guns.

The murder.

Our magic killing just as easily as it lifts a mug into the air.

My disappearance, the experiments I won’t talk about.

Our parents.

Stan cleared his throat. That was all in the past now. 

Chloe’s eyes were downcast, holding her arms close in a self-hug. 

Yeah. 

She remembered. 

“But uh– But I did the same when I was your age, so I can't judge. You did pretty good from… from what I saw. So I want you to show me what you've got so far.” 

Stan lifted himself off the ground in a light float, the bottom of his good leg and his hands glowing a harsh bright blue as they lifted him away from the earth. “Then I can show you how it's really done.”

Chloe’s eyes raised, a tired smile forcing its way to her lips. “Show off.”

“Well, maybe once you learn, you can also get a big head about it.”

Chloe gave a small huff in acknowledgment, her smile slowly falling from her face as she stared blankly at the ground.

Stan carefully lowered to the ground. This wasn't something they could just ignore and hope would go away, was it? 

He crept up to Chloe, the wind rustling the trees overhead creating an almost deafening cacophony in the silent spell that had befallen them like a thick blanket.

“Chlo?...” 

She wouldn't meet his eyes. 

“Talk to me, Squeaks, you’ve been off all day. What’s wrong?”

She took a sharp breath in, face scrunching up, eyes edged red.

“What do you think?” she whispered, hissed, practically. “I hate our powers. This is stupid, they’re stupid, I wish we never had magic. I don't wanna learn, I wanna– I just wa-anna be normal.”

Ah. Yeah.

Stan knew the feeling all too well.

He tried to find something encouraging to say to help lift her back up to normal, to tell her that everything would be okay and that she was perfect the way she was, powers and all. But he found that he really didn't have any words to say to make this better. Nothing that was true anyway. She wasn't wrong.

“... Chloe,” he finally started. “I need you to learn this for me, kid. I need you to be able to… to-to defend yourself in case… In case I can’t.”

Chloe’s body lurched with a held-back sob. “I don’t want to learn! I hate our magic! It’s not fair! I wish we never had powers, then I could still have a normal family. Then I wouldn’t have to worry about you not being able to protect me! I wouldn’t have to protect myself, I wouldn’t have to be strong, I don’t want to be strong! I wish Mom and Dad were still here! I just want my mo-mommy and daddy-y-y!”

She cried freely now, breathing shallow and fast as she tried to catch her breath over the shuddering and the tears, muscles clenched as she hugged herself in some small attempt at security, face scrunched and small and pained as she finally let out all that she’d been holding in the entire trip. For who even knew how long.

He gazed at her with glassy eyes; his sister weeping before him. She’d been through so much. His wonderful, amazing, annoying sister who he’d been through hell to protect. 

She didn't deserve this.

They both didn't deserve this.

He pursed his lips. Tears burned at his eyes now too, threatening to wet his cheeks just as they were doing to Chloe.

He pulled her in close to his chest, heartbeat thrumming against her as he held her tight. A hug she didn’t reciprocate, didn’t need to.

“I know. Me too,” he whispered.

It was unfair. It was incredibly, heart-wrenchingly unfair. Just knowing everyone and everything they ever loved could be so easily ripped away from their desperate grasp as easily as wind blows leaves across the ground. 

“But…”

Stan had screamed and cried about it for many a night and day, mourning the loss of the person he could have been if anything else was different.

“That’s not the hand we’ve been dealt,” Stan murmured into his sister's nappy hair, clutching her even closer as she trembled. “It's unfair, it's so, so unfair. But that's just…”

Screaming.

Crying.

Begging.

Running.

Wishing for something different.

“That's just how it is.”

And that’s why I need you to learn.

She let out a sob into his shoulder. They sat like that for a long while; Listening to the sounds of nature which never ceased around them. The whistle of the wind through trees, the birds chirping all around them. The continuously quieter weeping as the girl in the center of it all tired herself out.

“Those ho-orrible people, Chloe?” he breathed. “They want to capture you. They want to capture me. They did capture me. Tortured me. It’s a… It’s a miracle I escaped, honestly. They captured Mom, Da-ad. And–... and they would do it to you too, if-if given the chance.”

Teary wetness started to soak through the shoulder of Stan’s shirt.

He squeezed her shoulders, breath shaking. “I need you to… I need to know you can defend yourself, okay? A-and as much of a curse as our powers are, they’re strong. So strong, just like you. You can learn how to use them to defend yourself, right? In case I can’t anymore, in case–”

“DON’T SAY THAT!!” Chloe cried out, angry, desperate azure eyes flashing angrily up at her brother as she pushed away from him. “Say that you’ll always be here for me! Always! You can’t get caught again! I need you! Marcus needs you! You’re gonna stay with me and we’re gonna find Mom and Dad and you’re never going anywhere ever again, and neither am I! And neither is Marcus, or Mom, or Dad, and if anyone tries to hurt them again then I'll kill them and then we can all stay together! An’-- an’ I'll get the guys who tortured you too and I'll make them pay.”

Stan felt a melancholy smile overtake his face through the running tears. Maybe not the exact right motivations, wanting to kill anyone who ever tried to hurt them. 

But it was a start. 

He knew he couldn’t promise that he would always be here to protect her. His parents had promised the same thing. And yet…

“Don't worry, Squeaks, I’m–... I’m not going anywhere. Nev-never plan to,” He sniffled. “Also, uh… maybe don't kill them… that wouldn't make you much uh, much better than them, would it?” He winked. “Maybe just maim them a bit.

Chloe nodded slightly, jaw set as she took a deep, shaking breath and a similar smile Stan's started invading her features as well. “Yeah… Jus’-just broken bones. Thr-throw them into the ceiling like you do a little. Pay them back for your knee...”

Stan snickered. “I would love to pay back the person who crapped up my knee…” and he couldn't help the welling pride in his chest as he raised his gaze to look his sister in the eye once more. It almost caused the tears to start pouring all over again.

“And if you were the one to get them, Squeaks? Maybe you let me get in on the action too? God, I would let you lord that over me forever.”

Chloe burst into a little laugh, still marked with the haunting ghosts of sobs. “I would never let you forget it.”

“So… you're on board then?” he asked tentatively. “Gonna learn your powers and defeat the bad guys for me? Marcus is bringing some treats back to camp for when we’re done too, though you’ll get them either way, we all need a bit of a pick me up.”

“Treats?” She looked up at him like an astounded little puppy dog. Stan couldn’t help but laugh.

“Yeah! So you wanna work the magic a bit? Or you just wanna head back and be lazy?

“I…” She was still shaking. “I… I think… magic. But uh, but… You-you can fight your own bad guys. I’ll be too busy floating around you to help you not get your ass kicked.” 

Her eyes widened slightly when Stan raised his eyebrow at her.

“I mean… Butt.”

Stan scoffed. “Yeah, okay potty mouth–”

“Potty mouth? Are you five years old?”

“Am I five years old? You’re the one who can't say ‘ass’.” 

“That's because you're my brother!”

“Well,” Stan theatrically cracked his knuckles and drew some power up through his cane as he grinned at her smugly. “You know any five-year-olds that can do this?”

He swiped with a grand flourish at the nearest tree across the clearing, a full sweep through air in front of him with all the force he could muster up, bathing the now sunset orange-red ring of trees in a blast of eerie aqua blue. A deafening crackle-pop came from deep within the trunk, as if the wood itself was screaming out in protest, in agony, as cracks started to explode outward, shining through with bright blue light bursts. The side of the tree exploded with a thunderous roaring creak, gnarled and deep and sharp and twisting as it showered bark and wood pulp down on the two siblings as the both screamed in what was terrified joy and dove to duck and cover.

Stan immediately realized his error with a playful screech, jumping in front of Chloe and pulling her in close to shield her from the flying wooden shrapnel machine that the tree had so unwittingly become.

Then once again, the clearing was safe, wooden rain finishing its downpour, a few stray splinters tip tapping into the ground. The only sound to be heard now was the breathless laughter of two siblings as they took in the full breadth of what just happened.

Stan had just exploded a tree.

It looked like a cannonball had been shot through it! But surprisingly, it was still standing. Tilting, sure. But standing.

Stan cleared his throat, blinking against the wood dust. Chloe now stared openmouthed and wide-eyed at the mighty tree, a deep eternal gash scarring to the very heart of the wood.

“I uh–...” Stan coughed with a curt laugh. He had to pant to get enough air into his system “I didn’t expect it to explode that much.”

Chloe’s gaze shifted back to her brother, open mouth and all.

“That. Was. AWESOME!!” She cried, jumping up and down like a child on a trampoline. “I mean, you basically killed that tree… but that was so cool! I didn’t know we could explode things!!”

“Well I mean, I didn’t really explode it, I just kinda hit it hard enough that it exploded. Kinda surprised it's still standing.”

“Show me!” Chloe exclaimed, bouncing over to the tree to examine the damage more closely. “Show me show me show me! Show me how to do that, I wanna hit that hard!”

“Careful, you’ll get splinters!” 

“Shoulda thought of that before you exploded a tree!”

Stan hurried after her as fast as he could go without winding himself even more. He leaned extra hard on his cane as he walked, movements just a bit more sluggish. That had taken so much more energy than he had thought it would, even with the cane helping him along and aiding the power. But hey, at least Chloe was excited again. Happy. For now.

That’s all Stan could ever ask for.

* * * * * * * *

Next (when posted)

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