#dissertation synopsis
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
wrirkresearch0 · 1 year ago
Text
5 Points To Consider While Writing An Effective Conclusion For Your Phd Thesis
Introduction
One of the most important parts of the PhD thesis is the summary and conclusions you draw from your study. It's the final chance you have to make an impact on your readers, who will likely be a panel of professional reviewers, by summarizing your results and tying up any loose ends from your research. In addition to outlining your work, a strong conclusion is where you can highlight the importance of your study and explain how your work has advanced the area. Here are five key considerations for writing a powerful conclusion to your doctoral dissertation:
Summarize key findings: You should start your conclusion with a brief overview of your subject and the issue it presents. The next section provides a Phd Synopsis Presentation of your study's most important results and conclusions. Instead of introducing brand-new material, the conclusion is an opportunity to highlight the most significant findings and contributions made during the thesis. Make sure these results are readily understood by using simple, unambiguous language in your presentation.
Address research objectives: Examine the initial objectives and underlying assumptions of your original thesis. This study has contributed to the attainment of the stated objectives by examining the extent to which our research has facilitated their realization. Additionally, it has evaluated the accuracy of our initial forecasts. The significance and implications of attaining or exceeding these objectives for one's professional field should be underscored.
Reflect on methodology: Provide a succinct description of the thesis methodology employed in your work, highlighting its notable characteristics and limitations. In order to demonstrate intellectual integrity and analytical rigor, it is imperative to engage in a comprehensive examination of any underlying assumptions, constraints, or biases that could have influenced the outcomes of one's research.
Discuss implications, limitations, and future directions: When you discuss your findings in terms of the greater relevance they have, it will help you take them beyond the scope of the particular question that was being investigated in your study. Consider the ways in which your work contributes to the growth of knowledge in your field and the ways in which it could have an influence on future Research Paper Writing, policies, or practices. Put more of your focus on the "so what" component of your research, which addresses the question of why anyone should care about what you've learnt.
Every study has its own set of constraints, and acknowledging those constraints requires both self-awareness and honesty on the part of the researcher. The limits of your study need to be highlighted, regardless of whether they apply to the technique of the study, the data from the study, or something else entirely. You should also offer further research routes that could expand upon your results and fill up these gaps. As a consequence of this, it is abundantly evident that the findings of your research make a contribution to an on going discussion.
End with a Clear and Memorable Closing Statement: Make sure your last sentence is crystal clear and memorable to your readers. In a single sentence, sum up why your study is important and what you want readers to remember. It might be an inspiring quotation, a question that prompts more consideration, or a call to action for further study or implementation of your discoveries.
In addition to these five essential components, be sure to have an academic and professional tone throughout the whole of your conclusion and for this you can take help from Wrirk. It is important to avoid adding additional references or citations in this part, since its primary emphasis should be on summarizing and synthesizing the previous work, you have done.
Conclusion
There is more to writing an excellent conclusion for your PhD thesis than just reviewing the research you have done. It is a chance to reflect on the relevance of your work, accept its shortcomings, and stimulate more study and development in your subject. You can guarantee that your thesis has an enduring influence on your audience by adhering to these principles and meticulously constructing your conclusion. This will also allow you to make a relevant contribution to the field in which you are engaged in research.
More Query:-
Online Thesis Writing Services In India| Online Thesis Writing| Best Phd Thesis Writing Services In India| phd thesis writing assistance| phd thesis writing services| phd thesis writing services in mathura| sample thesis format| thesis format pdf| thesis methodology| thesis paper| thesis proposal samples| thesis statement| thesis writing format| thesis writing format pdf| thesis writing help| thesis writing services| thesis writing services india| thesis writing services near me| what is a thesis| what is a thesis statement example
0 notes
wrirknavigator · 6 days ago
Text
Are you stuck in the thesis writing process? Don’t worry - we’ve got you covered! In this video, we break down essential and time saving tips to help you write a high quality thesis faster and more efficiently.
Whether you're starting from scratch or struggling to stay on track, these expert-backed strategies will guide you through:
Choosing a strong research topic
Structuring your thesis clearly
Managing time and avoiding procrastination
Referencing like a pro
Editing and proofreading effectively
0 notes
ignousynopsis · 2 months ago
Text
How to Write IGNOU Synopsis
The synopsis is a mandatory component of many IGNOU academic programs, serving as the formal proposal for a student's final project. It plays a key role in outlining the topic, objectives, research methods, and expected outcomes. A well-written synopsis increases the chances of approval and ensures a structured start to the project phase.
This guide offers a clear and practical approach to preparing a synopsis that aligns with IGNOU’s academic standards.
Importance of the Synopsis in IGNOU Projects
Before working on the final report, IGNOU requires students to submit a synopsis for evaluation. This initial document allows academic evaluators to understand the scope and relevance of the research. It confirms whether the chosen topic fits the student’s program and whether the proposed methods are appropriate for academic research.
Approving a synopsis is not a formality. It sets the tone for the work ahead. Poorly written or vague synopses are often rejected, delaying the student's academic progress.
Selecting an Appropriate Topic
Topic selection is the first and most important step. It should be:
Relevant to your field of study
Specific enough to be manageable
Based on real-world observations or secondary data
Students in the MBA program might choose themes such as employee satisfaction, digital marketing trends, or working capital management. Those in M.Com may focus on accounting systems or GST practices in MSMEs. Choose a topic you understand well and can support with data.
Structure of the IGNOU Synopsis
IGNOU expects a defined structure in the synopsis. Each section serves a unique function. Below is the general format:
1. Title of the Project
The title should reflect the main theme of your study. Avoid vague terms. Use clear and meaningful wording that points to the purpose and scope of the project.
2. Introduction
This section sets the background. Explain the general subject area, mention the need for this study, and describe the problem it intends to address. Keep this section focused and factual. Use data or references if necessary to support the relevance of your topic.
3. Review of Literature
Briefly discuss previous studies or concepts related to your topic. This section shows that you've researched existing knowledge and identified a gap that your project aims to fill. Use this to justify why your research is important.
4. Objectives of the Study
List 3 to 5 clear objectives. Each objective should explain what you plan to achieve. For example:
To assess customer satisfaction in retail banking
To evaluate the impact of training on employee productivity
5. Research Methodology
This is the core of the synopsis. Explain:
The type of research: primary, secondary, or both
Data collection tools: questionnaire, interview, online survey
Sample size and population
Sampling method: random, convenience, etc.
How you plan to analyze the data (basic statistical tools, charts, etc.)
Avoid generic descriptions. Be clear about how the data will be gathered and used to answer your research questions.
6. Scope of the Study
Define the boundaries of your study. Mention the geographical area, target population, and the timeframe. For instance, “This study will be conducted among 50 sales executives in Delhi NCR during April–June 2025.”
7. Limitations of the Study
All research has its constraints. State them openly. These may include:
Limited sample size
Time constraints
Restricted access to certain types of data This section helps set realistic expectations for the findings.
8. Hypothesis (if applicable)
Some programs may require hypothesis-based research. A hypothesis is a statement that you aim to test through your study. For example: “Training has a positive impact on employee efficiency.” Not all projects require this, so follow your program’s guidelines.
9. References
Cite all books, articles, websites, or other sources used to prepare the synopsis. Follow a standard citation style (such as APA or MLA), and ensure each source is credible and recent.
10. Proforma and Guide’s Bio
Along with the synopsis, IGNOU requires submission of a project proposal form (Proforma) and the academic background of your guide. Your project guide must be qualified in your subject area and approved by IGNOU.
Writing Guidelines
Keep the following points in mind while writing:
Use formal academic language.
Avoid long and complex sentences.
Proofread the document thoroughly before submission.
Keep the length between 1,000 to 2,000 words, unless otherwise mentioned in your program guide.
Avoid plagiarism. Your content must be original.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
Many students face rejections or delays due to preventable errors. Avoid the following:
Selecting topics not related to your specialization
Submitting incomplete synopses
Failing to include research methodology
Not having a qualified guide
Ignoring formatting and structural instructions
Always refer to the latest project handbook or guidelines from your Regional Centre or the IGNOU website.
Where to Submit
Once the synopsis is completed and signed by the guide, it must be submitted to your respective Regional Centre. Some programs have provisions for online submission. Always check the mode of submission allowed for your course.
Keep a copy of your synopsis and the signed Proforma for future reference.
Benefits of Preparing a Strong Synopsis
Preparing the synopsis serves multiple academic purposes:
Clarifies your research direction
Helps manage your timeline better
Guides your interaction with respondents
Improves the quality of the final report
Ensures alignment with IGNOU’s academic expectations
A strong synopsis reduces the chances of major revisions later and contributes to better project outcomes.
0 notes
idealaunchphdguidance · 6 months ago
Text
0 notes
doctoratewritingpaper · 1 year ago
Text
1 note · View note
csiprojectsblog · 1 year ago
Text
Elevate Your Academic Journey with CSI Projects: Your Destination for Dissertation and Thesis Writing Services in India
Beginning a PhD program is an important effort. It's a massive undertaking that demands dedication, perseverance, and, above all, flawless research and writing abilities. Having the correct help and direction can make all of the difference as you work through the complex process of writing your dissertation or PhD thesis. That's where CSI Projects comes in, providing excellent dissertation and thesis writing services in India to students in Jaipur, Delhi, and beyond.
Inspiring Educational Quality: Our Guarantee to You
At CSI Projects, we understand the challenges and problems associated with academic research and writing. With years of expertise in the sector, we refined our skills to provide complete dissertation writing services in India that meet each scholar's specific wants and specifications. Whether you're just beginning with your research or nearing the end of writing your thesis, our team of qualified experts is ready to help you every step of the way.
Outstanding skill in dissertation writing
Writing a dissertation is a complex task that involves careful preparation, thorough research, and sophisticated writing. With CSI Projects by your side, you can be sure that your dissertation is in expert hands. Our talented writers and subject matter experts specialize in a variety of areas, ensuring that we connect you with the proper person for your task.
Tumblr media
We offer full assistance to help you complete your dissertation, from generating attractive research proposals to completing in-depth literature reviews and data analyses. Whether you need help creating research topics, expanding your methodology, or polishing your prose, our dissertation writing services in Delhi and beyond are tailored to your exact requirements and exceed your expectations.
Elevate Your Thesis with CSI Projects
For doctoral candidates in Jaipur and beyond, CSI Projects is your trusted partner in navigating the intricacies of thesis writing. Our PhD thesis writing services in
Jaipur is intended to provide complete assistance at all phases of the thesis preparing. Whether you're faced with hard conceptual structures or struggling to describe your findings, our team of experts is here to help you succeed.
  From developing a strong thesis proposal to doing thorough research and integrating your findings into a clear argument, we work constantly to ensure that your thesis reaches the highest academic standards. With our individualized approach and unwavering commitment to quality, CSI Projects is the premier destination for scholars seeking high-quality phd thesis writing services in Jaipur and beyond.
Tumblr media
Thesis Writing: Your Path to a Successful Dissertation or Thesis.
A well-written summary serves as a structure for the thesis or dissertation, making it the primary focus of your research effort. At CSI Projects, we understand the value of a compelling summary and provide professional synopsis writing services to help you express your research objectives, technique, and expected results with simplicity and accuracy.
Whether you're about to start your PhD education or need to improve your existing summary, our team of expert writers and editors is ready to help. We work carefully with you to understand your research goals and objectives while ensuring that your synopsis accurately expresses the importance and originality of your work. With our synopsis writing services, you may lay the foundation for a successful dissertation or thesis that makes a significant contribution to your field of study.
Tumblr media
Why Choose CSI Projects?
1. Our team of writers and subject matter specialists brings years of experience to every project, ensuring outstanding accuracy and competence.
2. Customized Solutions: We understand that each research project is unique and provide customized options to fit your specific goals and expectations.
3. Timely Delivery: We prioritize meeting deadlines and consistently execute projects on schedule.
4. Confidentiality: Our exacting processes guarantee the privacy and security of your research and personal information.
5. Our ultimate goal is customer pleasure. We go above and above to exceed your expectations and provide outcomes you can be proud of.
Improve Your Educational Career with CSI Projects Today!
Don't let the challenges of dissertation and thesis writing keep you from achieving your academic goals. With CSI Projects by your side, you can start your doctoral program with trust, knowing that you have a dedicated group of individuals to help you every step of the way. Call us today to learn more about our dissertation and thesis writing services in India, and take the first step toward academic achievement with CSI Projects!
0 notes
mediocre-writing · 5 months ago
Text
Fic recs Yoongi
Some fics I read this week, and I need to make people read them too lol I'll probably do it with the other members too.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Interlude | MYG | Series Masterlist @yoongiofmine (Idol!Yoongi X Deaf!Reader)
Summary: All Yoongi wanted was to use the last few months before enlisting to work on his solo projects, prepare for his tour. When the silence left around him as his members started to go one by one got too loud, he needed to find something else to fill in the void. But Yoongi would never have guessed that it would come in the form of you… Someone he would never expect to fall in love with.
– This is simply the most beautiful Yoongi series I've ever read.
——
The Consequences of Fucking Up @borathae
“Your break up was messy and painful. All you want to do is to forget about him. His friends, who ever since you ended it with Yoongi see you as their bullying target, make sure that the memory of him stays fresh in your mind however, haunting you day by fucking day. While Yoongi makes it seem as if he gives no fuck about your situation. Until one night he is in front of your door. Drunk and fucking regretful.”
– You won't regret reading it, trust me.
——
his entire world | min yoongi x f!reader | a serendipitous life series @serendipitous-seven
summary: you and yoongi are trying to enjoy your friends' wedding with a very fussy baby
– THIS WAS ONE OF THE SOFTEST THINGS I'VE EVER READ 😭💞
——
F*ck Tradition | Yoongi @dancinglikebutterflywings ( Min Yoongi x Fiancee!Reader)
- Synopsis: Y/N takes Yoongi with her to go wedding dress shopping because her fiancées opinion is the only one that matters.
– I feel like this story and this writer deserves much more recognition, MY GOD IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL.
you're okay | myg (m) @taegularities
Summary: Let it hurt and burn. Let it out; and then let it fade away. Let it heal. Yoongi can't lift all your burdens, but he has taught you at least this much over the years.
– This here comforted my heart in a way 😭😭💞💞
ex-things - m.yg. @namfinessed
summary: over the years, everything you've owned has belonged to yoongi and everything yoongi's owned has belonged to you but when you break up, everything is your's and everything is his but none of it belongs to the two of you anymore and both of you can't stand it.
– That was adorable and made me smile like a fool.
impression | yg @namjoonchronicles
↳ summary many forgot that when you marry someone, you marry their family too, at least that’s how Asian family is like
– This is so cute, I love the husband!Yoongi
The Final - Day 02 | MYG | ONESHOT @yoongiofmine
Summary: You've been Yoongi's go-to companion for the past few years, well aware that's all you were going to be. Despite your very real, growing feelings for the rapper, you took what you could get every time. Now, you're backstage at day two of the final leg of his tour when another member takes an interest in you. Will it be enough to make Yoongi realize he's got competition?
– it made me wild and crazy
dissertation | yg @namjoonchronicles
↳ summary many people doubted your union, how exactly an artist with as much influence as yoongi be a husband to a wife that is still studying. 
– Yoon being the person we all need, This writer is wonderful, please give him a chance. (I'm telling you this writer is amazing)
Shy - Yoongi X Reader @7ndipity
Summary: You’re desperately craving your boyfriend's attention, but are too shy to ask for it outright. Luckily, Yoongi knows what you want anyway.
– This is something cute and warm.
YES, I WILL DO MORE BECAUSE WE HAVE MANY TALENTED WRITERS.
1K notes · View notes
foolinafable · 7 months ago
Text
squeeze you in
SYNOPSIS: Viktor barely has the time, but he makes it for you PAIRING: Viktor x reader WORDCOUNT: 5.2K TAGS: S1 Arcane, set around Act 1 and before Act 2, 5 year age gap, assuming arcane uses weekdays and seasons. Fem pronouns towards the end NOTES: spent all weekend writing this, hope you all enjoy. try not to mind any editing errors
This was decidedly a bad idea. Wandering the halls of the academy at night wasn’t dangerous, even with the recent attack from the undercity, that's if you could even really call it an attack. To you, it seems to be children getting involved in things they shouldn’t. You could remember them now, the swirls of brown, red and blue running along the roofs of Piltover after the explosion in the apartments of the academy. While many around you felt fear, all you saw were children. Sure, they looked only a few years your junior, but even Heimerdinger tells you that you are only on the cusp of adulthood, still shadowed by childish tendencies. You suppose that he is correct; twenty is only one year off nineteen, and that age is considered a teenager despite its adult allowances. 
You take a deep breath as your hand curls around the handle to Heimerdinger's office, unsure as to why you feel so nervous. It’s not as if you're stealing anything but rather retrieving it. You had foolishly left behind your notebook during your meeting with him when it had been interrupted by the council having an impromptu meeting, something you are sure had something to do with Talis. You needed it for a meeting the next morning with another professor about your dissertation, your last piece of work as a student at the academy, and you couldn't go to the meeting without it. Least you look unprepared, surely your job offer as a researcher for the academy could be rescinded if you didn’t appear completely committed.
So, despite your better judgement, your anxiety outweighed it as usual as you slowly opened the door to the dean, your mentor's room. You crept inside, even though nobody was around, afraid even the slightest noise could get you caught snooping after hours. Quickly, you found your notebook on the chair. You had left it opposite Heimerdinger's desk; he preferred it when you told him of your research and studies without the aid of your writings, so you had placed it next to your body on the chair. You picked it up, signing in relief that this was as easy as you hoped, when another notebook caught your attention, one that certainly wasn't on the desk when you left. Curiousity about getting the better of you as you reach for it, opening it to the first page, eyes widening at the text ‘If found, please return to Jayce Talis'. Your mind quickly remembered an interaction you had overheard in this very office earlier that day.
You were walking the path towards Heimerdinger's office, only this time it was daytime, the sun was out despite the slight winter chill warming anyone in its path. You slowed as you got towards your mentor's office, frowning at the sound of voices coming from inside. Did you get the time wrong? You wondered, looking down at your watch, showing that you were, in fact, on time. Your hands are sweaty now, anxiety crawling at the idea of interrupting, deciding to stay outside for a few moments to calm down.
“Why can’t I read it?” An exacerbated voice rang out, his accent making your face feel hot
“That Talis’ work was dangerous; the explosions in the city were proof of that; you don’t need to be involved, Viktor”, Heimerdinger's voice rang out, proud as always
“I hardly see how simply reading what he was working on is such a bad thing. I thought the greatest scientific ventures were the ones that bent the rules of the institution.” The man Viktor, you assume, tries to manoeuvre the conversation to his favour, but Heimerdinger is seemingly having none of it. Moving closer to where you are by the door as if to get the boy out of his office, you quickly knock on the door, worried that he would open the door and see you eavesdropping. Both voices stop at the sound of the knock, and Heimerdinger quickly opens the door. You awkwardly smile at the dean, eyes rising to meet the amber ones of the other body occupying the room.
“Can I come back later?” You twiddle your fingers, nervousness wracking your body at interrupting whatever this is
“No, no, come in”, Heimerdinger exclaims, pulling you by the hand into his office, yelping at the sudden contact as he continues to speak. “We were done here anyways”, his eyes solely on Viktor, who seemed to have mellowed out your presence, quickly giving his goodbyes before leaving the room, closing it behind him.
So this was what the man was interested in, what he was forbidden from reading. You tap your fingers on the book cover before quickly placing your notebook on top of it, drawing your bottom lip into your mouth with your teeth as you quickly depart from the office, might as well make all your worries worthwhile. 
It wasn’t until later the next day you saw the man you were looking for; it was early afternoon, and you were packing up after having lunch when a head of unruly brown hair caught your eye, sitting in the corner of the cafeteria, coffee in one hand sandwich in the other. Grabbing Jayces book, which you had procured the night before, you quickly made your way towards the man before you lost your cool. Unceremoniously dropping the book in front of the man whose eyes darted from you to the book, mouth opening and closing in clear shock. 
“I hope whatever is in there is worth it,” you muttered, adjusting your bag on your shoulder before turning to leave.
“I-how?” Viktor called out, but you only replied with a cheeky smile, finger covering your mouth in secrecy as you walked away, thinking that to be the only interaction you would have with your mentor's other protege when his voice called out to you, not so far behind
“Wait” 
You stood stock still as he approached quicker than you would’ve thought given his cane, but you suppose it was a silly thought that an ailment could stop a man on a mission. Once he catches up with you, he continues to walk, so you join him, slightly confused as to what he may now want.
“Have you read it?” he asks. 
“It would be a lie to say I don't know of its content,” you replied, noticing his smile at your remark, eyes sparkling with wonder.
“What did you think?”
“I think...” You trail off, trying to come up with the right words as you both round a corner. “What he wants to do is revolutionary...” Your words scamper off slightly as you notice his eyes on the side of your face.
“But” he reads your mind.
“But”, you echo “I am unsure if he completely knows what he is doing or how he plans to do it”, trying to be as vague as possible due to the students scattered all around “I wrote some notes”, you gesture to the book “Things I thought could be helpful, I assume that's why you wanted it, to learn” 
“And how did you get it?” he wonders aloud. “Last time I checked, Heimerdinger wasn't giving out illegal independent research to anyone”, he said with a smile on his face.
“Let's just say it certainly wasn't by asking nicely,” you tease, matching his grin with one of your own “Well, you should probably go read and hide that before Heimerdinger sends out a search party for it.”
“I probably should” Viktor smiles as he turns back the way the two of you came, the book held tightly in his unoccupied hand. 
Continuing to walk the way you had been, you couldn’t help but feel relief at the fact that the book was now out of hands and the man, Viktor, seemed just as keen to keep this a secret as you did, even if you did spend all night essentially peer reviewing Jayce Talis’ work, unfortunately, your need to stay out of trouble with your superiors greatly outweighed your want to indulge in what he and assumedly Viktor was planning, you could only hope that your words you had spent all night working on where a help instead of a hindrance. You especially wanted to know how Viktor would take the words you wrote specifically for him at the front of the book: 
‘The greatest scientific ventures are the ones that bend the rules of the institution’   
—     
One of the benefits of being the dean's newest protege was that the academy gave you your lab, a small space just for you, it even had your name on a metal plaque on the door, probably due to the academy's narcissism, thinking that they would keep you even after your graduation, not that they were wrong. A fact that slightly irritated you. 
You didn’t usually get many visitors, just Heimerdinger, to see what you were working on, but those meetings were usually scheduled so he could ensure you were tallying in your lab and not at one of your usual haunts like the library. So you couldn’t help but jump at the sound of a knock on your door, eyebrows furrowed as you called out to whoever stood outside your door.
“Come in!” 
Your confusion lingered as Viktor walked in. It had only been a few days since you’d given him Jayce’s book, and from what you had heard, the two were now employed to continue Jayce’s studies non-illegally this time, being funded by Councilwoman Medarda, which they have named ‘Hextech’
“You’re not an easy woman to get ahold of”, Viktor claims as he takes a seat at your desk “I have been stopping by your room for a few days, but you were never in”, he continues, eyes piercing as he takes in the view of you, stood by another desk filled with colanders and Bunsen burners
“You sound like Heimerdinger when you say that” You smiled slightly in truth, scoffing at the face he made, clearly not appreciative of your parallel “What?” you laugh “he has said similar things on various occasions”
“I understand why,” he remarked.
“I spend a lot of time in the library, researching. Especially at the moment with final deadlines coming in, as I’m sure you remember,” he hummed at your explanation “And it’s not as if I’m a professor with allocated office hours, I don't need to be here,” you tell him passively looking back at your work at the table, deciding to turn off the flame not going to get any worthwhile work done until he's gone.
“So what can I do for you?” you asked when the man still sat in silence, seemingly comfortable to just watch you work he blinked, taken away from wherever he went upon registering your words.
“Oh well, I just wanted to thank you, Jayce, as well, for getting his book and your notes, they were more than helpful with working through the kinks in his theory- instrumental really to the breakthrough”, he admitted somewhat bashfully, stumbling over his words a little not that you noticed nervousness crawling up your spine at his approval of your words.
“Oh, um, you're welcome. I mean, a fresh pair of eyes is always helpful..” you murmur, unsure of yourself now as he stares at you, not daring to make eye contact, knowing it will only make your nerves worse.
“We were wondering, Jayce and I, if you would read some of our other research in the future, help us out. We would give out any references in the future for any work you do after study” he speaks delicately, soft and slow and if worried, he would scare you off like a child being caught doing something they shouldn’t. Your heart seems to slow from its anxious thumping as you contemplate his offer.
“I don't see why not”, you ponder absentmindedly, but your mind is already made up.
“Really?” he asked, though he didn’t sound shocked, more like he was trying to egg more words out of you.
“If you can find me, that is” You smile, the nerves falling away from you as he laughs a little 
“I’ll go tell Jayce the good news; he's going to be over the moon. You didn’t hear it from me, but he has always wanted to work with you. He said something about loving your approach in an article about the arcane:” You looked at the man again, but he simply walked out of the room, not sparing you another word. You had honestly forgotten that your last article had been published, and the fact that academics that you knew had read it and enjoyed it made a smile appear on your face, maybe this was going to be better than you had thought. 
A routine had been established this past few months, as winter made way for spring, you had found yourself in a comfortable pattern with the boys.
Once a week, on a Wednesday, you would spend the entire day in your lab working, and at some point, Jayce or Viktor would drop by with some work for you to look through and maybe a comment or two on things you had written the week before. These meetings were usually brief as they quickly needed to get back to work, so you would spend hours going through papers, tweaking diagrams, and sometimes even trekking to the library for a book that might help them. It wouldn’t be until the sun had made way for the moon in the sky that you would be done, taking the work down several corridors and stairs to get to their workspace, where they would still be working to drop them off. The two would then call it time for a break, so the three of you would scamper your way to the cafeteria for a change of scenery while you all ate the food you packed for lunch but had yet to get to.  
Today, however, Viktor seemed hellbent on breaking the schedule the three of you had unknowingly created. He had appeared at your lab, maybe a little earlier than he or Jayce usually decided to grace you with their presences, but it was of no matter to you, honestly, the earlier, the better, as it meant you may finish earlier than the hour of the wolf. He did bring a stack of papers with him, but instead of dropping them at your desk, sharing a few complimentary words, and then leaving, he dropped the work at your desk and then sat himself in the new chair he and Jayce had procured that was placed on the other side of your desk so they would have somewhere to sit, not that either of them had used it up until now. 
“You alright?” you ask, grabbing the top paper from the pile, you could immediately tell this was Jayce’s as the handwriting is much neater and the use of a very inky pen you quickly grabbed your pink pen and started to read the words on the page only to look up and give the man a sarcastic glower at his lack of words to which he simply smiled, not even the slightest bit disheartened by your look. 
“Jayce is off for the day, something to do with his sponsorship with the Kirammans. Told me to take the day off” he shuffled in the chair, attempting to get comfy as his hand grabbed at your notebook, deciding that he would read through some of your work for once
“And you have decided to spend your time here? Doing more work?” you questioned, though not paying the man much attention, mumbling to yourself on the words on the page, completely unphased by Viktor’s lack of decorum, it’s not as if it’s the first time he got bored and decided to read it. “Would mixing it with metal only make it more unstable?” you mutter, not expecting an answer “As an alloy, maybe, or would that make it worse..” you tap the pen on your cheek in thought before scrambling to write your thoughts in the margins of Jayce’s research
“I don’t see reading through your essays and research papers as work”, he admits, a shameless smile gracing his face as he watched you mumble to yourself “More of a palate cleanser, really”
“I just thought that a rest day was supposed to be resting, like having time away from work?” you tried to put the idea of leaving and maybe getting some sleep into the man’s head, his eyebags were becoming a permanent feature on his face like a shadow he cannot be rid of. 
“Quite hypocritical, don’t you think?” a teasing look on his face at your words “Is today not also your day off?” he questioned even though he knew the answer. You simply rolled your eyes, trying to smile as he barked out a laugh.
While today was your break from lessons, it had quickly become anything but a rest day after you took the boys up on their offer, there was no way that you could complete your last year's work and help them if you didn’t give up your rest day- so undoubtedly you were a hypocrite, much to your chagrin. 
“Just because I give up my days off to help you doesn’t mean you need to do the same,” you tell him, not wanting the man to feel obligated to help you.
“Maybe I want to?”
Well, you can’t argue with that.
The two of them work on your rather small desk with an ease you wouldn’t expect, but you find yourself very comfortable working alongside him and somehow, the work seems to go by faster.
Maybe it was because you wouldn’t need to spend countless hours trying to figure out what chicken scratch either of them had written on your own. Instead, a second pair of eyes, Viktor’s eyes, made the process go by much faster, albeit with some laughter at what on earth either of them had written. You had even managed a trip to the library, something you rarely had time for, usually going to pick up books for the boys the day after, or Jayce would go the day after with a slip of paper. Not only did you and Viktor have the time to pick up some books, but you also went through and verified if they could have something useful inside. 
The sun was still shining bright in the sky when you and Viktor had dropped everything off at his lab, still a few hours left of the day. It was an uncharacteristically nice day outside, certainly warmer than you would’ve expected from the spring in Piltover, so the two of you decided to eat your packed lunches outside on a bench within the academy grounds, both too tired to bother going exploring the city for somewhere nicer. 
“Now you have helped me, do you think I could convince you to go home and get some sleep, the bags under your eyes are also large enough to be considered their entities” You smiled, laughing quietly at the man sitting next to you as he coughed back his food, clearly not expecting your smartmouth  
“As if you’re one to talk”, he quipped as you let out a shocked gasp, though quickly matching his smile
“How about I promise to go back to my apartments and take a breather if you go to yours?” you propositioned. Honestly, some time in bed sounded heavenly
“Only if I walk you back, I don’t want you to sneak back to your office, I hear you can often find yourself in places you aren’t supposed to”, he joked
“It’s a deal then” Both of you chose not to comment on the matching grins on your faces. 
—   
When Heimerdinger said your last year of study would be the hardest, you believed him. But never did you imagine you could be so swamped.
 This past week, you had corralled a table in the library to yourself, spending more time sitting in the uncomfortable seat than anywhere else. It was deadline season, and to say it was hitting you hard was an understatement. No matter how well prepared you thought you were, the workload was unimaginable, leaving you with barely enough time to sleep or eat. Jayce had joked that during his last year, he essentially became a book within the library, and while it was funny at the time now, you understood why, feeling more and more like an encyclopedia by the day. 
Luckily for you, your self-imprisonment was soon coming to an end; all you needed to do was read through your coursework one more time, and it would all be done, your last piece of work as a student of the academy. You would dwell on its bittersweetness another time as you read through another paragraph, completely absorbed in your work, completely missing the familiar sounds of footsteps and the tapping of a cane coming your way.
“I swear I need to get a tracker on you” Your head shot up at the sound of Viktor’s voice
“I’m not that hard to find”, you complain as he sits himself down in the chair closest to yours, cane leaning against the table 
“I don’t think you get much of a say on the matter, your not the one who has to aimlessly wander around the academy” 
“Whatever”, you glower, attempting to get back to your reading when his hand reaches out to grab yours. you jolt, looking up as he intertwines your fingers
“How are you doing be honest” he holds eye contact as his thumb rubs at your index fingers, stopping just after he knuckle before traveling back up 
You smile “I’m drowning” 
he hums “I can tell” You slump rather unceremoniously into your chair, eyes closed as he continues to rub affectionately at your knuckle, a half-hearted attempt to seep all the tension away from you “Have you got much more to do?” he questions voice soft 
“No, just need to read through it once more, then it should be good to submit” You let out a large breath of annoyance, wishing you were finished, wanting nothing more than to crawl into bed and sleep
“Then you’re done?” he probes 
“Completly done, well, until my contract starts as a researcher in the summer”, you clarify, eyes opening slightly, not missing the slight smile on his face, looking down when you heard a rustling of papers only to see Viktor’s non-occupied hand grabbing at your work.
“Take a break; I’ll give it the last read-through. Knowing you, it’s already perfect.” his soft yet stern voice didn’t leave much room for argument, so you closed your eyes again, only for a moment letting the constant feel of his thumb lull you into a calm you had never known. 
It was only, however, when you heard the unmistakable voice of Jayce that your eyes opened again, you sent a sheepish smile his way at the admittance that you had, in fact, fallen asleep, trying not to laugh too loudly at his remarks on how much Viktor must have been boring you, if only he knew.
Since you had officially handed in all your work and your classes had finished, you now found yourself with a lot of free time, a prospect Viktor and Jayce very much enjoyed. Coming every morning to your door to walk you to their lab for a day of work. Not that you minded, but before Hextech, your plans for the summer would’ve been reading or doing whatever Heimerdinger would see as befitting, so the work was beneficial to you, stopping you from going extensional on what it is you want to dedicate your academic life to, especially since you had no ideas, other than those to help the boys revolutionalise hextech, their current program with the hexgates you were sure was due a breakthrough any day. 
You found yourself sat at Jayces desk, him gone for the afternoon schmoozing with some counsellors to try and get as much funding off them as he could. You found yourself tapping along to the melody of the song Viktor had put on, the only time you could have music was when Jayce was out, as he claimed it was too stimulating for him. Working exactly where the man had left off, creating a small prototype of the hexgate, one of many that were to be used in tests planned for later in the week. You barely batted an eye as Viktor appeared next to you, used to him appearing closer than most would
“It’s looking good”, he gestured to the model in your hand you simply hummed in response, adding the final gear, shoulders slumping when you put it down. 
“How many do we need again?” you ask, hands rubbing at the tension in your neck from huddling to get a good look at what you were doing.
“Too many”, you groaned at his sheepish admittance. It was silent for a moment or so before he spoke again, an unknown quality to his voice that made you look up at him in confusion. 
“Jayce and I were thinking..” he trailed off slightly 
“Oh no”, you joked, smiling when you caught the amusement now on his face 
“I know, how scary”, he smirked “Anyway, as you’re coming back as a scientist for the academy, we thought, why not make your place with us permanent.”
“Really?” you questioned, do they honestly want you to help them all the time with the work that could improve lives and be the history pages? 
“I don’t think we’d be able to function without you now” he admitted 
“I’d love to,” you tell him smiling 
“Good”, the relief flooded the man “Because we already asked and got the go-ahead from Heimerdinger”, he confessed
“That confident?” you teased
“Obviously” 
You thought you had done a good job at pretending that today was just any other day, but clearly, as Viktor sat next to you with a cupcake with a candle in it - you had been wrong.
“How did you know today was my birthday? I didn’t tell anyone?” you asked, astonished. 
“Heimerdinger told me”, he revealed after you stared at him, clearly pleased with himself 
“How does that end up in conversation?” you wonder
“Don’t be so nosey”, he teases, hand coming to grab at your nose 
“Says the one who went to our mentor to ask about my personal life”, you accused, but the large smile on your face showed no malice in your words
“Touche”, he forfeited this round, lighting the candle on the cake before pushing it back into your face you simply sent him a look of victory before blowing out the candle, he quickly disposed of the candle before giving you the cake to eat  
“Got any big plans for twenty-one?” he wondered aloud 
“Work with you” You shrugged your shoulders, laughing lightly as you dug into your birthday cake
“A noble pursuit, I’m sure” It was silent for a short while as you finished your cake, but you didn’t make a move to speak, knowing the look on his face, he wasn’t done “Not going out celebrating? With a boyfriend, maybe?” 
“No, no boyfriend, never had the time for any of that. Heimerdinger told me that when a woman dedicates her life to academia, she does not bother dreaming of a family or a relationship, and I agree not many would be able to handle it. Why do you ask?” you admit
“Don’t want to be stepping on anyone’s toes is all”, he speaks nonachanlty despite his words being anything but  
“Well, your not”, you promise, lacing a hand with his
“Good” he brings your hand up his lips
You both had way too much stuff. The prospect of moving in together while still exciting the amount of work you had left made you gnaw at your bottom lip. You had a lot of help from Jayce and a rather reluctant Caitlyn to get the boxes into your and Viktor’s new home, and while she commented on its quaintness, it was certainly bigger than anywhere the two of you had ever dreamt of living in
“A family home”, Heimerdinger had teased the two of you when you told him, and you suppose he was right. You didn’t think much about the two spare rooms when you had purchased the house, thinking they would probably be offices, but Viktor absolute reluctance and disdain at your idea to turn one of the rooms into a library after looking at the sheer amount of books the two of you owned made you think differently, it wouldn’t take a smart man to know what he wanted to do with them. 
“Stop that” Viktor pulled your bottom lip away from your teeth, an annoyed glint in his eyes, clearly thinking about how many times he had told you those same words you simply kissed his thumb, making him smile at your affection
“There’s so much to do”, you inwardly groaned as you rested your head on his shoulder, making sure not to put too much of your weight on him
“We have the week; don’t need to do it all tonight”, he reminds you, giving a kiss on the top of your head
“Come on, I’ve already started in our room” You straighten up and follow him into your room looking at the picture frames he had already put around the room, one was placed on his bedside table, a photo Jayce had taken at your graduation with your cap and gown arms warped around Viktor a huge smile, all teeth as you look at the camera while Viktor is smiling proudly looking at you, smiling at the photo you move on to the frame he placed on the dresser, a piece of paper framed within it your hands grip the frame looking at the familiar words you had written:
‘The greatest scientific ventures are the ones that bend the rules of the institution’  
You turned to the man who was busying himself with a box filled with jumpers you had never seen him wear 
“You kept this?” you smile as he turns around, noticing his bashful expression at being caught. 
“You holding it, arent you?” he asked, trying to drive the conversation 
“Why,” you asked, not giving up so easily even as he caressed your face in an attempt to distract you groaning, he relented, he could not give you what you wanted, ever so spoiled by him you were
“At first, it was to remind me that it was all worth it” 
“At first?” you echo
“Then I kept it because it reminded me of you, of the future I want us to have, and that will only be possible if I kept working, even if it means going beyond the council and what they want.” 
“I was only shadowing your view, what you had said to Heimerdinger, something I wasn’t even supposed to hear”, you remind him.
“Well, I’m glad you did”, he admits “And I’m even more glad that you stole Jayces book because bending the rules is what brought us together”, his hand not on his cane gripped at your hip.  
“I’m glad I did, too”, you confirm your words with a kiss.
1K notes · View notes
wrirkresearch0 · 2 years ago
Text
Get Expert Research Synopsis Writing Assistance at Wrirk.com - India's Leading Academic Writing Assistance
Are you seeking expert guidance for writing your PhD thesis or research paper writing? Look no further than our professional services at Wrirk.com. We are a trusted name in the industry, offering a comprehensive range of writing assistance tailored specifically for PhD candidates in India.
Our team of experienced writers is well-versed in the required formats, including Synopsis Format,thesis writing,research proposal writing, and data analysis services, ensuring that your work meets all the necessary requirements. With our help, your journey towards achieving your academic goals becomes smoother and more efficient. Contact us now to avail of the best PhD thesis writing services in India!
Tumblr media
0 notes
thescrcservices · 2 years ago
Text
Tumblr media
The Importance Of Research Methodology In Your Thesis Call us: 6268991983 Mail us: [email protected] Visit: https://thescrc.org/ https://thescrc.org/the-importance-of-research-methodology-in-your-thesis/ #PhD #phdlife #phdjourney #phdjobs #phdresearch #research #researchstudy #ResearchMatters #ResearchChallenge #researcher #dissertation #financialplanning #analysis #management #scholarship #thesis #Synopsis
2 notes · View notes
oc-brainstorms · 5 months ago
Text
My strange addiction 18+
Perv!Dom!Voyeur!Kang Dae-ho x Sex addict!Fem!reader/Thanos x Reader(kinda)
This is part 1, part 2 is here!
Synopsis: SMUT! Sex addict reader finds Dae-ho jerking off to her and Thanos having sex, she makes it her mission to try him out next and Dae-ho treats her exactly how she wants to be treated wink wink
warnings: Kinda dark/swearing/mentions of death/murder/ kinda cheating?/Mentions god(in a bad way)/Voyeurism/bathroom sex/public sex/mentions of anal/smut/reader uses thanos/Dae-ho is kinda pervy/rough/non-con?dub-con?ish/unprotected sex/p in v/Oral (M receiving)/daddy kink/reader is a sex addict/horny af/reader is fucking feral/overall filth/aftercare/angst/fluff/reader has some major issues (I haven't slept so if I've forgotten anything let me know) READ AT YOUR OWN RISK
Words: 4.5K (it’s a long one)/
Unedited! there's gotta be a few mistakes in it but I wrote this instead of my dissertation and sleeping so take it for what it is I guess.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
I was never one to drink, do drugs or jump off tall things all for a little adrenaline rush-No, I was particular in my chosen addiction. Sex was always my vice. I tasted it one and couldn't get enough. It’s never really mattered to me what they look like or how good at it they were, if the thought pops into my head then it’s all I crave, like an itch that demands to be scratched. Sometimes I don’t even want it, like when a smoker who's trying to quit doesn't even think about lighting the cigarette in their mouth, it's basically a habbit.
Many interactions with vile, disgusting men and bad life choices led me right here, surrounded by people in green sweatsuits playing deadly children’s games for money. It’s not exactly where I thought I'd end up, I always thought I’d die in a ditch somewhere-discarded and used without a care in the world.
Salty sweat drops fall on my forehead from the purple-haired man thrusting to his hearts content in an out of me, grunting in my ear like he's on a mission. He’s not bad, a little too desperate and loud for my liking but hey, a fuck is a fuck. Plus he was pretty good-looking under the whole wannabe-bad-boy-rapper persona.
“You like that? hmph-So good-so so good.” He grumbles, his voice mere groans of hot breath in my ear.
“Feels so good daddy-please keep going please!” My voice was no higher than a pathetic whisper in return, becoming conscious of the creaks the bed was emitting, echoing in the empty space of the room. Thankfully many people this side had died in the previous game.
My hips were beginning to ache from the angle I’m spread to- My jaw clenching as I feel him wrap his hands behind my knees and shove them up until they hit my shoulders. The pain was easing from my hips but it did nothing for the lack of excitement I was feeling. It was a little mundane for me, stuck in missionary while he has the time of his life-but it will satisfy my needs nonetheless.
I can’t help but let my thoughts wander, craning my neck to glance over his shoulder as his pounding continued, just listening the the sounds of our skin slapping and the weak sounds of the bed frame holding us up.
My attention is suddenly drawn to a rusting from a bed on the other side of the room. Under the glow of the obnoxiously large piggy bank I can just make out a large figure, laid in bed with the covers just covering his hip. Squinting into the darkness I make out rapid movements under the covers.
Is this perv getting off to us?
I let my eyes linger for a while, feeling myself getting wetter from the idea of this stranger pleasuring himself to the sounds of us fucking. Trailing my eyes up I can just about make out his number, 388. Taking a mental note, I try to peak at his face through the darkness.
A gasp gets caught in my throat as I make eye contact with dark eyes that stare back at me. His whole face wasn't clear but I could sense his eyes burning into mine as he welcomed himself to the free porn he was witnessing.
‘So fucking wet for me.’ Thanos panted out, snapping me back to his attention. Thankfully his head was buried in my neck and he was too busy chasing his own high to notice my distraction.
Maybe I should give him a show.
I took my hands and placed them firmly on Thanos’ chest.
“Stop.” I manage to gasp out, pushing him back enough to look at his face. His cheeks are flushed and his eyes are crazy, Purple strands sticking to his forehead. His thrusts stagger a little before coming to a stop.
“What the fuck is wrong girl, why are you stopping me when I'm about to fill you up?” The tone of his voice is slightly erratic, and a little too loud-but I had new priorities than everyone else's sleep.
“I just wanna ride you Daddy, please?” Fluttering my eyelashes up at him, I knew he couldn't disagree with me, especially as I clenched myself around him.
“Fuck okay-okay.” He talks over himself, gripping at my sides to manoeuvre me on top of him.
I knock my head on the metallic grate on underneath the bunk on top of us, but don’t even stop to acknowledge the pain, I've got a new task to complete. I can’t let poor 388 go to bed unsatisfied now can I?
I reposition myself straddling him, letting my hands rest on his chest while he sinks his dick into my hole. I’m already pretty raw so it stings from the stretch, feeling him throb inside me from the sensation, a small gasp erupts from my throat.
Rocking my hips back and forth, I feel him glide in and out of me, making sure to arch my back and stick my ass out to give the best possible view to my new friend.
“Just like tha-fuck just like that.” he mutters through staggered breaths. I can feel him getting close so I need to do my best with the time I have.
In a brave move, I move my hands up from his chest and glide them up my body, stopping to grip onto my breasts and squeeze, Hard. I moan louder than necessary, but not loud enough to cause a scene.
Bouncing hard on his dick, I bring my hand to my throat and start to lightly choke myself, throwing my head back and feel my hair hit my back.
“Fuck this pussy, oh god, oh my fucking god-so good, so tight oh fuck.” I hear him groan, reaching his climax as hot spurts of cum squirt inside of me, filling me up.
I lean forward, laying my chest back down and craning my neck to glance over my shoulder. I watch how 388’s covers slowly come to a halt, a subtle shake as he finally finishes. I wish I could hear him trying to catch his breath over the snoring of the rest of the room, but ill sleep happy with the knowledge I've done my job-for now.
“You finished right, girl?” My attention is drawn back to the heavy breathing of the purple haired asshole under me, his hands still feeling up my hips and ass as I catch my breath.
“Yeah sure.” I nod, through gritted teeth, slipping him out of me and laying beside him.
“Good, gotta take care of my girl, especially when she’s being so damn good for me!” He ruffles my hair before turning over, falling asleep almost instantly.
God he has so much faith in me not to kill him in his sleep.
My mind didn't relax enough to sleep, too focused on all the ideas I had to get my way, I will seduce this man, I don’t even care if he’s ugly or horrible. Anyone that desperate to cum clearly needs my help, maybe he’ll actually make me cum.
My lord isn’t it bad I'm more focused on this than the games? well I guess it is a game of sorts… wtf is wrong with me, anyways.
I roll my eyes and try to push my thoughts away. Ignoring the sweaty body next to me, I pull my crumped clothes back onto my body and lay back down, fading off to a dreamless sleep.
----
The most irritating and mind-numbing sickly song wakes me up in the morning. That along with the bright lights is enough to make me kill someone-even outside of the game.
I’ve never been a morning person, nighttime is where all the fun happens-hell I don't even wake up till gone 2pm most days. However, this morning I have a task-find this mystery man.
I sit up in bed-taking no notice of the absence of the man next to me, and try to brush my fingers through my knotted hair, pinching my cheeks and lips to look more alive.
God did they have to give us these ugly ass outfits.
Doing the best with what I have, I tie up the top into an extreme crop and pull the joggers down lower on my hip, lazily throwing the sweatshirt on.
It'll do.
I scan my eyes around the room like a predator hunting its prey, reading everyone’s number until my eyes land on the one I'm looking for.
Bingo.
He’s tall, good looking-man bun be damned, chuckling along with something an older man is saying and a-is that bitch pregnant? Damn. He stretches, his muscles flexing as he does, almost having me salivate on myself. He doesn't even glance over here before waltzing over to to the breakfast queue.
My footsteps are fast but inconspicuous, anyone else probably would’ve thought I was just hungry- and I guess they'd be right, but not for food.
I manage to squeeze in behind him, shuffling my feet closer to his.
“You’re pretty cute for a perv.” His shoulders stiffened, glancing at me over his shoulder.
‘What?” He mutters back to me, his eyes raking over my body before returning his eyes forward.
“I thought guys who liked to watch people fuck without them knowing were balding and lived in their parents basement with food stuck to their face and a box of tissues next to them.” Ok, that was a weird thing to say- but am I wrong?
His breathing takes a sharp incline as he shuffles forward with everyone else in the line.
“I wasn't watching you.”
“It’s okay baby I'm not mad a you, was I good for you?” my voice is confident but low, closer to his ear than before because of the people joining the queue behind me. Not sure if he's really as in to public humiliation as he is into public masturbation.
“I'm sorry, okay?” he whispers, without glancing back. More of a whimper really, slut.
“I just told you I'm not mad.” Im more short in my answers-im starting to get bored from this restrictive situation. I do get bored easily.
My lips almost touch his ear as I lean in, playing dangerous.
“Should've let me know you needed it daddy, this pussy has your name all over it.” I stroke over his back as I come down, tits grazing his back.
He chuckled darkly, looking down at his shoes, before turning his body to to me, a slick smirk playing on his mouth as he leant down and met my eyes.
“Really? Because to me it looks like it has that guy’s cum all over it.”
He blinked, before turning back and continuing to follow the queue.
I don’t have an answer for that, he really got me there to be fair.
My lips form a sharp line and I feel a heat rush to my cheeks, I kept my eyes down and stayed silent. I didn't know I could still feel embarrassed by anything-but here we are. I also tried to ignore the wetness growing between my thighs at the situation, the degrading really does it for me I guess.
He grabbed breakfast from the guard before sauntering off, out of the corner of my eye I saw him silently giggling to himself as he walked away, asshole.
I picked up my pathetic little apple and grumbled, taking a harsh bite out of it. If he's playing hard to get then I guess I'm just gonna have to play harder.
----
After the games, the vibes really sucked. Thanos was loud and annoying as usual but at least he didn't let me die. That was kinda nice of him, or maybe it was the fact I promised him anal if he got me through it-but nevertheless, it good to be alive.
I spent a long time in the bathroom, making sure I looked perfect after that mess. I also scrubbed myself raw, feeling dirty after the game, and the fuck and especially after 388’s comment. The 5 minute shower I somehow convinced the guard to let me have did wonders. He did watch me the entire time-but at least I'm clean!
After we once again got voted to stay, I got bored of the repetitive conversation and laid on my bed, staring at nothing in particular.
I glanced down over my feet at the door to the bathrooms, taking notice of the tall pretty boy leaving.
I didn't think twice about it, my feet moving on their own. I had to have it out with this man- he acts like a disgusting pervert watching me fuck and suddenly he's all cocky? I don't think so.
Thankfully the guards really don't give a fuck about who goes into what bathroom. I stand outside waiting, watching for the door to open. I didn't want to enter the bathroom and catch him pooping- I may be deranged but I'm not a total freak.
He wasn't in there long, and nobody had come in or out since him. Hearing footsteps approaching the door I give a quick wink to one of the guards, Showtime.
He barely opened the door before I pushed him back inside, closing us in the empty bathroom.
“Woah.” He managed, jumping on the defence and getting ready to attack before his eyes locked on me.
“Oh its you.” he relaxed, sighing.
“You miss me?” I asked sweetly, leaning back against the door with my hand resting on the metal handle.
“It's hard to miss you when you keep showing up,” his hands moved to his hips and his face bore an amused smirk, playful.
“You upset me earlier, thought you'd wanna make it up to me.”
“By telling you the truth? if that upsets you darling then you put have a real hard time with everything else in here.”
“Listen, you-”
“No you listen,” He steps towards me, a strange dominance lurking under his voice.
“I have enough going on here without some needly little whore deciding she's important enough to start bratting out because I used her pathetic show of attention-seeking to get myself off.”
My breathing increases as he steps closer, I was not expecting that to come out of his mouth, I’m not often too stunned to speak but somehow he's done it in the two conversations I've had with him.
I stare up at him through my lashes, my mouth dropping open a little as I pant through it. God is this turning me on?
“You gonna do something about it, tough guy?” Is all I manage to conjure, coming out in a stupidly quiet voice.
“Since you seem so desperate for me I'll do you a favour and put that dirty little mouth to use shall I?” He suddenly reaches forwards and grips my hair in his hand, a sound between a moan and a sob exiting my mouth as he does.
He shoves me across the room and into a stall, pushing us both in before slamming and locking it shut behind us. His grip stayed strong in my hair.
I don't know what I thought this guy would be like, I thought he would be a sweet little perv who helps pregnant girls and laughs along with old men’s jokes and then rubs one out while watching two people fuck like animals.
“Kneel.” He demands, his grip one my hair beginning to give me a headache. I don’t move, sure I've had men be rough before but this really took me by surprise.
“You want me don't you?” He spits out, but something in his eyes seemed softer, like a shimmer of guilt washed over them.
“Yes sir.”
“Then be a good girl and show me how much you want it, down on your knees.”
My knees buckled by themselves, gripping his thigh for support I hit the dirty bathroom floor and looked up at him with wide eyes.
“You know what to do slut, I'm sure you've had enough practice.” His eyes were back to being hard now, whether it was all the emotions during the games or something else had hardened him, and he desperately needed release, and Im more than happy to help with that.
I bring my hands up to his waistband, dragging down the green joggers and his boxers down together, watching as his hard cock flung free.
“Spit on it.”
I swirled my tongue around my mouth and tried to muster all the saliva I could, bringing my lips to the tip of his dick and letting my spit slowly drip onto it.
His eyes glaze over and he leans his head back, a groan slipping through his lips.
Taking my chance, I grab his throbbing cock with my hand and slowly pump my spit all over his shaft.
“I-is that good daddy?” I manage to stutter out, hand moving up and down as I slowly trail my tongue up his tip, tasting the pre cum that's already leaking out.
What the fuck is wrong with you, get your shit together.
“You know that's good slut, you're just begging for my validation aren't you?” He chuckled again, that deep chuckle he keeps doing that sounds like he's just been told a dirty joke, amused but interested.
I ignored the degrading tone and looked back down to his cock, its big and throbbing-a lot bigger than what I'm used to, or at least than what I've had in a long time.
Nervousness seeps into my brain but I push it back, taking him into my mouth and guiding him to the back of my throat.
As my nose hits his clothe stomach, my head is whipped back by his grip on my hair, a sudden flash of pain strikes my cheek and I feel tears welling up in my eyes from the sting.
“I asked you a question slut, or are you too stupid to use your words?” The look in his eyes flashed with amusement, like he was speaking to a cute puppy who just learnt a new trick.
“Yes sir.”
“Yes what?”
“Yes sir, I want your validation.” It hurt to spit the words out, but as soon as I did my head was thrusted back onto him.
He doesn't speak for a while, just grunting softly and leaning his head back against the cubicle wall with his eyes shut, fucking his dick right to the back of my throat like I'm nothing but a fleshlight he's using. All I can do is stifle my gags and take him, my face wet with my tears and the saliva dripping down my chin.
“So.Fucking.Good.” He chokes out between thrusts.
My mind goes black with everything else other than pleasing him, nothing but the pain in my throat and the blurry vision of his body above me.
His breathing quickens and I'm sure he's about to cum, my hair now fully being ripped out by the strength of his hands tangled in it.
“What should I do?”
I look up at him and try to muster up the most confused face I can under the circumstances, managing to furrow my eyebrows.
“Should I cum…down your throat?” His thrusts begin to slow slightly as he drags out his question.
“Or on this pretty little face?” His finger drops down and traces my jaw.
“Or should I have you lift up your shirt so I can cum on those perfect tits of yours, baby?” His questions receive no answer considering my mouth was still bing invaded by his thick cock.
“No, No, I know the perfect place.” His voice is dominant and looms over me.
With a swift movement he pulls me off of him, one arm under my armpit while the other stays in its place in my hair. They glide down to my own joggers, ripping them down to the floor along with my underwear, leaving me exposed and shaking from all the sensations of my body.
His large hands find my thighs and grips onto the backs of them.
“Jump.” He orders, and of course I follow through. Before I know it I’m pinned up against the cold wall, and being forced to bounce on his solid dick that's thrusting in and out of me at a rapid pace.
My arms find his shoulders and I cling on, hiding my whimpers in the Crook of his neck as I let him use my cunt for his pleasure.
“You want me to make you cum don't you doll?” He teases.
“Ye-Yes s-sir, please sir, yes, yes, yes!” I hate how the pathetic yelps come out of my mouth but the pleasure rocking through me takes my mind away from any embarrassment.
“That other little boy couldn't do it for you could he? You need a man to make you cum don't you huh?”
“Please make me cum Daddy, I'll do anything.” my voice sounded more like broken sobs coming through my lazily parted lips, already cock drunk from this humiliating situation.
He grips my wrist tightly and drags it between my legs.
“Rub yourself, c’mon princess I know you can do it,” His sweet words hit my ears and I immediately obey, becoming a gasping, moaning mess as I rub rapid circles around my sensitive clit.
Almost immediately after I feel myself reaching my climax, my head throwing itself back as he lunges for my throat, leaving sharp hickeys down my neck.
His breathing changes and soon after he's open-mouthed kissing my neck as I feel him pump his cum up into me, the grip he has on me weakening with every moan he produces.
As he lets go of the hold he has on me I drop to the floor, knees weak after the use he put them through. Im tired, and sore and sticky, I can feel him dripping out of me and onto the disgusting toilet floor. My eyes are heavy and my face flushed, with chapped lips and baby hairs sticking with sweat to my forehead and a tangled mess behind.
As the glow of my orgasm fades I get the same sinking feeling I always get when I finish, the feeling where Im immediately disgusted and ashamed and just want to cry and try and forget that I've just made a fool out of myself for a strange man.
I bring my hands to my face and sigh deeply, still trying to catch my breath. I forget the man*-whose name I still don't know* is there. Im sure he’ll see himself out eventually.
My unravelling show of self-pity is interrupted as I feel the man crouch down next to me, silently watching me cry into my hands.
Awkward, I bet he's regretting even meeting me now.
“Hey,hey.” He coos, his voice softer than soft. He seems afraid to touch me as his fingers ghost over my arm.
I bet he's so fucking irritated god I would be.
Imagine you've just fucked someone out of pity and they start crying on the fucking floor.
“I’m just gonna clean you up okay angel?” I sniffle and stop in confused awe. Moving my hands away from my face I wipe the tears off and pull them down until my eyes are peaking through.
He keeps eye contact for a moment before reaching over and grabbing toilet paper from behind him, ripping some off he starts to clean up the mess between my legs, uttering small apologies as I hiss from the contact.
“Shh..it's okay baby, you're okay.” His words are soft and comforting as he manoeuvres my clothes back on me. His hands stop at my waist as he tries to catch my eyes, but I'm looking everywhere but his face with my half-lidded gaze.
“Can I see that pretty face again? Please baby, let me clean you up.” I nod, eyebrows still subtly furrowed in suspicion.
With the softest touch he moves my hands away from my face, taking them in one of his and using the other to gently wipe off any moisture that remained. His touch felt like a feather grazing my skin, it was nice, I've never been treated so nicely before.
He fucking hates me doesn't he, oh well what do I care, I don't care anyways.
He places a hand on my knee, not in a way that's sexual but more of a calming gesture, probably to help stop the shaking by body has absentmindedly started doing.
Everything inside me is telling me to run, push him away and go find my bed to rock myself to sleep in, but something about the kind care in his eyes and the gentle touches he's gracing me with is making me want to stay here for as long as I can.
His other hand comes up to my hair, his fingers attempting to gently remove the knots that had built up from his harsh tugs.
‘Did I hurt you, go too far?”
I shook my head.
“Why are you doing this?” I broke my silence, voice barely audible.
“Doing what, sweetness?” He glanced down at my face, his voice soft and caring with a glance of concern.
“Why are you being so nice to me?” The words left my lips with a short chuckle, not an amused, joking chuckle, but more of disbelief and confusion-like when you hear something so ridiculous you can't help but let a chuckle slip out.
I sound so fucking pathetic.
“I’m taking care of you, you deserve it.” His confusion grew, his eyebrows getting more furrowed together the more he took in the disbelief on my face.
“You don't even know me, I don't even know your name, you don't know mine.”
“I would like to.” I stopped, staring blankly at him.
“My name Is Y/N.” I mustered up, I'm sure he doesn't really care-but it would be nice to be on a first name basis with this man, at least he's being helpful.
“Beautiful name, it suits you.” He spoke without moving his head away from the focus he had on my hair.
“What's your name?”
“Dae-Ho” His fingers freed themselves and he leant forwards, placing a soft kiss to the top of my head.
“Thank you.”
“What for?” he whispered against the skin of my forehead, the coolness of his breath causing a shiver to sneak down my spine.
“For telling me your name.”
Thank you for being nice, for holding me softly, for being so sweet and kind and affectionate to someone you don't care about.
“Angel I will tell you every single thing I know if it makes you happy.” My breath hitched and all wordings fell short in my throat. His eyes were light and kind, he didn't seem at all to mind easing me through this mini meltdown.
“Why?”
“I told you, i’d like to get to know you.’ He paused, his mind seemingly somewhere else, thinking deeply about his next words.
“Would you like to sleep in my bed with me tonight? i’d like to be able to hold you now, it feels wrong to part ways after this, unless you have plans with the crayon you were sleeping with before.” The sarcasm in his voice seeps through when he speaks about Thanos, a subtle spit of jealousy perhaps mixed in with his words.
Interesting development.
---------------------
A/N: Lit havent slept and wrote this with no editing so if its ass lmk lol- also my first piece of writing on tumblr! exciting times-many ideas ahead.
405 notes · View notes
iamgayjesus · 9 days ago
Text
Study of Shadows📝🥀
Pairing: Professor Agatha Harkness x PhD!Reader
Tags: slow burn, possessive Agatha, power imbalance, academic tension, grief and magic, dark academia, angst and fluff, eventual smut, tags to be updated.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Synopsis: A guarded PhD student is assigned to the mysterious and powerful Professor Agatha Harkness. In their candlelit meetings, secrets unravel, and a slow-burning tension grows between teacher and pupil—where knowledge, desire, and possession intertwine in a dark dance of magic and longing.
Chapter One: Between Light and Dark
🖋️Ch. 2 // Ch.3
You didn’t expect much from your doctoral journey.
Not glory. Not prestige. Certainly not rest.
What you anticipated were the usual ghosts — long nights hunched over brittle pages, ink-stained fingers twitching from too much caffeine and not enough clarity. You expected footnotes that bled into oblivion, your spine aching from chairs too hard and ideas too heavy. You braced yourself for loneliness — the kind that lingers in academic hallways long after the lights go out, when even the walls seem to whisper in forgotten tongues.
What you didn’t prepare for was how easily grief would follow you in.
How it would settle beside you in the library, breathe against your neck in archives, lace itself between the lines of your dissertation. No one warns you at orientation that scholarship and sorrow are twin sisters — that they walk hand in hand through every lecture, every paper, every late-night revelation you mistake for progress.
You didn’t expect your advisor to vanish either.
Three weeks in — no warning, no explanation, not even a professional courtesy email. Just gone. As if they’d walked into the stacks and simply… dissolved.
You asked around, once. Politely. Once was enough. Eyes dropped. Conversations rerouted. One of the senior professors said something about a sudden sabbatical, but their voice cracked on sabbatical like it wasn’t quite the word they meant. You caught a TA whispering that he’d been sent away, but the phrase felt too deliberate to be casual.
And still, you waited.
Until the message came —
just a line of sterile type in your inbox, timestamped 3:11 a.m., the kind of hour that never delivers good news:
Subject: ADVISOR UPDATE
Your research profile has been reassigned. Please report to Professor Harkness this Thursday at 6:00 p.m. (Office 4C, Antiquities Wing).
Attendance is not optional.
No greeting. No signature. No attached explanation.
Just her name.
Harkness.
The one who reads old tongues like lullabies and walks
the campus at hours when the shadows grow too long.
And with it, something cold pressed itself beneath your skin — not fear, exactly, but something quieter. More dangerous. The kind of dread that doesn’t shout, but waits.
You stared at the email for longer than you’ll admit, rereading it like you might unlock a softer meaning the third time through. You didn’t.
You closed your laptop. Sat in the stillness of your apartment for a full hour.
Outside, the city moved on — cars passing, wind shifting the curtains, the streetlight flickering in its usual faulty rhythm. But you sat frozen, aware only of the weight behind that name. Of the silence it summoned.
You told yourself you’d heard the rumors.
But the truth is, everyone had — and no one ever told them the same way twice.
And she doesn’t take students.
You sat there in the half-light of your kitchen, your tea cooling you.
Why you?
You weren’t political. You weren’t legacy. You didn’t play the long academic game with the rest of them, smiling at the right faces, asking the right questions at conferences just loud enough to be heard. You sat at the edge of things, always watching. Always digging.
Still, you knew your work was… difficult.
Not to write — writing came easily. It poured out of you like breath, like blood. No — difficult to touch.
You’d built your thesis like a locked room, every chapter carefully warded, every argument too sharp for casual handling. Professors left it alone not because they didn’t understand it, but because they didn’t want to.
It made them uncomfortable.
And maybe that’s why, when your advisor vanished and the reassignment email came through without explanation, a part of you — a quiet, bitter part you’d never admit aloud — thought:
“Of course they gave me to her.” You exhaled.
Because your thesis wasn’t gentle.
_____________
The day you were supposed to meet her, the world had the strange, alert stillness of a day before a storm.
Leaves curled at the edges, crisp and uneasy. The sky above the university hung low and grey, all color leached from it like a faded memory. The clocktower struck three — slow, resonant chimes echoing through the courtyard — as you stepped across the flagstones toward the North Tower.
No one else was around.
That should’ve been your first warning.
The building itself looked older than the rest of campus — as though it had been moved here from somewhere far more haunted. Ivy crawled thick along its stone skin. Gargoyles watched from high corners with expressions that felt… personal.
You climbed the narrow spiral staircase to the fourth floor, your boots echoing too loudly in the silence. The corridor at the top was cold, despite the season, lit only by wall sconces that flickered with lazy golden flame.
Her door was at the end. Her office.
You hesitated.
The wood was dark, almost black, with an iron handle that looked like it would bite if you touched it wrong. Her name was etched in a brass plate: Professor A. Harkness.
You raised your hand to knock.
The door opened before you could.
And there she was.
You didn’t expect her to look like that.
Not when she turned toward you, silhouetted against the grey-blue light of the rain-slicked window behind her. Not when her eyes landed on you like a blade sliding into place.
She wasn’t old, like the rumors suggested. Nor was she particularly young. She was the kind of beautiful that made age irrelevant — composed of angles and shadows and something ancient humming just beneath the surface of her skin.
Her coat was still on, black and tailored, high-collared and dusted with a fine shimmer like smoke. Her hair was twisted into an elegant knot at the nape of her neck, loose strands curling down like spells half-finished. Her hands, ringed and bare of gloves, rested on the back of the chair before her, fingertips drumming softly — a rhythm without a melody.
Her voice, when it came, was velvet against your throat.
“Miss Y/L/N,” she said. “Right on time.”
You swallowed. “Professor Harkness.”
The door clicked shut behind you without her moving. You didn’t remember stepping inside.
She gestured towards a velvet chair.
You sat, uncertain. The room smelled of dried herbs, wax, old books. Rain on slate. Something sharp underneath it all — burnt rosemary, maybe. Or binding chalk.
She watched you like a cat might watch a bird that hadn’t realized the window was open.
“I’ve read your proposal,” she said at last, settling behind the desk like a queen slipping into her throne. “Interesting subject. Difficult. Possibly career-ending, depending on how recklessly you pursue it.”
You blinked. “That’s… fair.”
She hummed — not quite approval, not quite amusement. Her fingers trailed across the cover of your thesis file, resting there with eerie familiarity.
“You understand, of course, that words like ‘binding’ and ‘consent’ carry weight beyond the page?”
You met her gaze.
“That’s why I chose them.”
Something flickered in her expression — not surprise. Not exactly. More like recognition.
“Good,” she said. “Then we won’t waste time.”
She leaned forward, just slightly, and suddenly the distance between you felt paper-thin. You could see the silver threads at her temples. The fine lines beside her mouth. The coiled stillness of her — like a spell wound tight, waiting for a trigger.
“Tell me,” she murmured, “why do people make vows they can’t escape from?”
Your breath caught.
And not just because it was the question at the heart of your work. But because her voice had dropped — intimate, intrusive, like she already knew your answer.
You thought of all the texts you’d read. The names signed in blood. The whispered pleas buried beneath layers of formal phrasing.
You thought of want.
Of love that felt like ruin. Of fear, too deep to name. Of devotion that didn’t need to be returned to feel real.
“Because,” you said, your voice quieter than you meant, “they want to belong to something. Even if it hurts.”
Her eyes didn’t leave yours.
“Very good.”
She didn’t blink.
Neither did you.
When she dismissed you, twenty-seven minutes later, it was with a small nod and the simple phrase:
“I expect progress weekly. No excuses.”
You nodded, hand tightening around your satchel strap. As you turned to go, her voice followed, soft and deliberate.
“And Miss Y/L/N?”
You paused.
“Careful with your phrasing.”
You swallowed, pulse tripping.
“Words have teeth.”
And though she smiled — elegant, amused, all ice and shadow — you couldn’t help but feel that something had already been written between you.
Not in ink. Not in blood.
But in silence.
Something binding.
Something beginning.
______
Hey guys, please let me know if you’d like me to continue!
203 notes · View notes
ellfucksup · 4 months ago
Text
⛧°。⋆༺♱༻⋆。°⛧
Teachers Pet
Cho Sang Woo x reader
Tumblr media
Request: anonymous
Synopsis: The strict but hot substitute takes over your college class today. College setting.
Warnings: READER IS 18+! MDNI, smut, p in v
Tumblr media
Rushing quickly to your next class, dreading your coursework hand-in—perhaps because you didn’t do it. Technically, it wasn’t your fault. Long story short, you thought it was next week.
"We’re all human," you think to yourself, cringing at how your professor is gonna react. Hopefully the old bastard won’t notice, and you can melt into the background of the class. Perfect strategy.
Walking into the room, you head straight to the back right corner, covertly ignoring the professor at the front—trying your absolute hardest to avoid attention. Once seated and settled, you do a quick glance up… only to find someone far worse than your professor.
Professor Sang Woo. Head of your dissertation module.
What the fuck is he doing covering this class? you scream in your head.
"Hello, students. I’ll be covering Professor Stanton today due to unforeseen sickness. I’m aware I’m not the usual substitute—everything has been rather last minute.”He speaks confidently, almost bored.
"Today, you’ll be handing in your rough drafts, and I’ll be organizing one-on-one feedback throughout the day. Everyone, drop in the papers now and put your name next to a time slot on the board." He finishes as he sits at the desk leaning back. His demeanour, one of complete superiority makes your skin crawl. You hated people like him, how they enjoy being in charge.
Everyone starts lining up and taking their slots. You stay seated, watching everything unfold as the last person leaves the classroom. He doesn’t look up from his notes as you slowly approach.
"Erm, really sorry, sir, but I don’t have a full draft—just notes," you squeak out.
He huffs and looks up at you over his glasses.
“Ah, Miss Y/N, I’ve heard what you're like from Stanton. Safe to say, I will not be putting up with your behavior the way he does."
"I want you here at five o’clock," he says, standing up and making his way to the front of his desk.
Getting very close, he leans in and whispers into your ear, "I don’t respond well to poorly behaved students. Have something written by then, or I’ll have a punishment lined up for you."
He almost growls the words, making your legs shake—but you can’t quite pinpoint whether it’s from fear or a slight thrill.
He leans back against the desk, looking smug, clearly picking up on the inner war your mind is waging.
You clear your throat and nod. "Yes, sir," you manage to get out before hurriedly making your way out of the classroom. Perhaps a little too quickly. You swear you hear a chuckle as you leave.
- - - - - -
You had found a secluded corner in the library, somewhere to have your meltdown in peace.
Frantically scribbling down probably some of your worst work ever, but anything is better than nothing, surely.
You had five minutes before you had your one-on-one.
Taking a deep breath, you walk into the classroom. He’s already there, waiting, leaning back in his chair. Face blank, watching you walk towards the seat opposite him, although there is a mischievous gleam in his eyes.
Sitting down, you hand him your draft—well, you weren’t even sure if you could call it that.
He takes the paper, you see his eyes skim over your poor handwriting. You fiddle with your hands, the nerves starting to really kick in. He places it down smoothly and starts taking off his glasses. You both sit there looking at each other, his eyebrow raised, clearly not impressed with your work.
“This is all you managed to do with the time I gave you?” he asks, unimpressed.
“Yes,” you squeak, feeling yourself start to shake.
“I think this deserves a reprimand, truly unacceptable work. I’d expect better from you—your grades are good, if not exceptional,” he sighs.
“Reprimand?” you ask timidly.
“Stand up and come around here now,” he demands.
At first, you don’t budge, shocked and honestly quite unsure about what his next move was. You rapidly scramble onto your feet and walk around the desk.
Suddenly, he pulls you onto his lap. You stare at him, wide-eyed with shock.
"Good girl," he whispers into your ear. "Now, lie over my lap—face down, ass up," he almost growls.
Shocked, you hesitate for a moment before obeying, heat creeping up your skin. You hate to admit how thrilling this feels.
“Bad girls get punished,” he states, pulling up your skirt and panties down. “Oh, look at you—wet for me already. Bad girl, I’m going to have to punish you for that too.”
“Say, ‘Yes, Professor, I’m a bad girl,’” he says while rubbing your cheek.
“Sorry Professor, I’m a bad girl” you whisper trying hard not to moan as you feel his fingers dip to your core. Before he got any further you get a slap to your cheeks, followed by another and then another. He groans out clearly enjoying himself.
Out of nowhere you both hear a knock at the door. Frozen in place you start shaking. “Shit” he mumbles under his breath.
———————
I never finished this but I thought I’d post let me know if anyone wanfts a part 2
117 notes · View notes
g0thc0re420 · 9 months ago
Text
Soulmates AU! Growing Pains: Leonard McCoy x Reader
Tumblr media
Word Count: 17, 923
CW: age gap! slow burn, cursing, smut (choking), mentions death of parent. Dr. kink.
Synopsis: Maybe this was what you needed. A change of scenery, hopefully a reassignment to some other foreign planet where you could collect more samples. You rubbed the inside of your wrist. Another heartbreak, so far, the worst one of your Starfleet days. Taking a peek just to reassure yourself the mark was still there, still not yet able to make out the half image fully, you dropped your head and sighed. Maybe you were late. You had been in Starfleet practically from birth. Your mom was one of the best captains in recent Starfleet history, or depending on who you asked, she had already found her place amongst the greats, and in some instances even giving Admiral Pike a run for his money. You only hoped you could live up to what she had always imagined for you. You quickly pulled down your sleeve and stood, soulmate be damned, the stars waited for no one.
********************************
You traveled through the ranks of Starfleet quickly, as to be expected, and currently stood in front of Admiral Pike's office. You had no idea what this meeting could be about. You were on shore leave from your current assignment and you were hoping to be able to sleep in sometime this next week. You quickly shook those thoughts from your head as you raised your hand to gingerly knock on the door. Stifling your nerves, still feeling like you had been sent to the principal's office. 
“Come in,” called from the other side of the door and you took a breath to steady yourself. Entering the office you were taken aback to see a head of jet black hair already sitting in front of the Admiral. Waiting for his gesture before sitting, the two of you are too close for the formalities of Starfleet at this moment.
“I understand you’re on shore leave at the moment so we’ll make this quick. The USS Enterprise is getting ready to leave on a 7 year voyage, and Commander Spock has apparently waited until this very moment to choose his right hand, man.” You must have looked extremely confused considering the subtle taken aback look on Spock’s face. 
“I’ve kept quite an eye on you since you joined the Academy.” Spock finally spoke, and you allowed yourself to turn and look at him. “You hold a doctorate in botanical sciences and you wrote your dissertation on how we could take Hippomane mancinella and from removing one gene make a non-poisonous twin that could be used to restore coastal plains.” Spock paused for a second, glancing at Admiral Pike before continuing. “You are also my best friend, and I care very deeply for you. I hope you know that I have chosen you because you are the most logical choice for the job.”
You could feel a flush of heat spread rapidly across your face, slightly bowing your head towards him, “Thank you Commander Spock.” The slight twitch in the corner of his mouth was all you needed. 
“You also made Lt. Commander this year, you’re 24, certainly one of the youngest we’ve had in the current history of Starfleet,” Admiral Pike spoke again.
You looked back at him and cleared your throat, sitting up straighter in your chain, “Youngest to make Lt. Commander in the last 25 years,” a weight sat heavy on your chest as the sentence left your mouth. The real reason for your hesitation. 
“(Y/N) do you even realize how proud she would be of you? Even if you never joined Starfleet? You have her brains and her heart, and based on what I’ve heard from Spock here you’ve gotten one over on him more than once during sparring exercises.” 
“How long do I have to pack?” 
Three days later, you were before Spock once again. This time in an office of your own and quickly falling into a comfortable silence with the vulcan by your side. Both of your heads buried in your PADDS as you both had to finalize a few remaining documents and double check all incoming reports. You were tasked with helping Spock give out the assignments to everyone who stepped foot on the Enterprise. You painted a smile on your face and made sure everyone was where they were supposed to go. Noticing that your line was dwindling down you looked around for Spock, wanting to double check nothing else remained on your part before the USS Enterprise took off on her adventure. 
“(Y/N)?” A voice behind you half screamed your name and as you spun around your sights quickly fell on Uhura. You double checked that no one needed your assistance before sprinting over to her and enveloping her in a hug. “I thought you were away!”
“Admiral Pike called me back. I’ve been reassigned.” 
Her eyes widened as she stepped away from you in shock, “No way!” You frantically nodded as she let out an overjoyed squeal while dancing in place, “Thank god I'll at least have you for the next 7 years.”
After making a lap around the ship to make sure there were no stragglers you met Spock again, this time quickly falling in stride beside him and heading to the bridge. Quickly you were introduced to several faces you had never seen, before your eyes fell onto the man sitting in the Captain’s chair. 
A soft smirk fell on his face as he stepped toward you and pulled you into a hug, “Welcome aboard (Y/N). It’s good to have you home.” 
You pulled away from him, suddenly conscious of how many people were watching the interaction. “Thank you Captain. It’s good to be here.” Moving back to stand behind Spock you stifled the feeling of embarrassment that crept up within you. What would everyone think? He was your boss. 
Pulling out your PADD you read through a couple new reports that had started filing in while waiting for James to finish his speech and by the end of his rambling when Spock looked at his PADD all he needed to do was skim the documents and provide a signature. As he went to comment on the way you gave clear and concise instructions in response to any remaining questions in the correspondence he noticed you were already gone and there was no trace of you on the bridge.
Moments later Spock found you, already diving head deep into the research you couldn’t wait to explore. Prepping the built in greenhouse for any future plants that could cause significant problems.
“I see we are quick to begin our work,” Spock mused, hands behind his back as he stepped into what was now a barren tin can. 
“Yes!” You quickly stood from the container you were mixing starter soil in, “If we get to our next destination alive I want to be prepared,” You took a small step closer to Spock, lowering your voice hoping that no one else would hear. “I apologize for leaving the bridge so abruptly earlier. When Captain Kirk hugged me it made me extremely uncomfortable.”
“I understand the sentiment as I also do not fare well to public displays of affection.” Spock gave you that vulcan half smile again before walking over to where you previously were and picking up a pair of gloves.
*******************************
6 months in and Leonard was pissed. You had been a thorn in his side for 34 days now. For the last month he had tried hunting you down, but he didn’t even know where to start looking. Why did the enterprise even need a botanist? It was just one more patient that tested the remaining patience he had left. “Dammit Jim you promised me I would have (Y/N)’s physical exam done by the end of the week!” 
“I was just calling about that, if you want that done you’re going to have to make a house call.”
“Now why would I do that?”
“Because I might have not told them anything about being late for any sort of physical just to mess with you.”
Leonard sighed before bringing both hands up to his temples. 6 months in and he could already confirm he was going to die of a stroke. Jim was going to speed up that process tenfold if he continued with antics like this. There was some sort of virus going around the ship right now, he didn’t need to be making calls to random personal quarters. 
“When I get my hands on you.”
“Thank me later, Bones.” Leonard could hear the devious smile Jim held on his face through the comm and couldn’t help but instinctually roll his eyes as he was then told the two locations he could find you. Checking the time he was certain he would be able to find you at your quarters. He entered the turbolift and in his anger almost ran into Spock.
“Doctor.” Spock gave a subtle nod of acknowledgement.
“Commander.” The air was stiff around them. McCoy, not too sure why he didn’t like the Vulcan, maybe it was the coldness. He was so still in everything down to his breathing. Almost the complete opposite of the way a human reacts.
A lightbulb went off when he suddenly remembered that Spock was a science officer, the blue shirt had been in front of him multiple times this week and Leonard hadn’t made the connection until this very awkward moment.
“Commander Spock, one of the science officers, is late for their physical exam. I tried recruiting the Captain for his help in informing them, but apparently he’s just been playing games with me the entire time. Would you happen to know where I could find Lt. Commander (Y/L/N)?”
He didn’t miss the way the Vulcan’s eyebrows raised as he lifted his head from whatever he was reading on his PADD. Looking maybe a little too close, Leonard could see an almost quizzical look appear on Spock's face. “That is very unlike (Y/N). Some days I fear they may run a tighter schedule than me.” Spock only half spoke the latter sentence aloud, mostly musing to himself. Spock looked at the floor level the confused doctor chose and almost felt pity. Has Leonard McCoy really not met you yet? The thought was somewhat incredulous to Spock. You had to be the clumsiest human he had ever met. Sober you was almost as bad as an inebriated Jim. 
“You’re not going to find them in their personal quarters. I would start at the research library, if you don’t find (Y/N) there, go to the greenhouse.” The turbolift opened and Spock gracefully stepped out, “I wish you the best of luck Dr. McCoy.”
After getting somewhat lost from the library, Leonard finally found the greenhouse. He stopped at the door, not knowing what sort of protocol to follow, so he rapped on the door with the back of his knuckles. There was a moment of silence before he heard you call out.
“Come in,” The first thing Leonard saw when he stepped in was a giant computer system running a constant stream of intel from the plants you had collected on surface missions already. From soil hydrations, pH of the soil, humidity in different areas of the greenhouse. He looked around before seeing a pair of blue pants to his left and there you were, almost completely bent over. He didn’t even notice the trough like planter you were currently digging to the bottom of, all he could focus on was the way those blue pants clung to your body. From the roundness of your ass, his eyes trailed down to your thighs, further down to where your pants just ever so slightly flared at your calves.
“Need some help there Darlin’?
Your head quickly popped out of the planter, the blush you were currently experiencing, exacerbated the redness of regaining blood flow to your head again. Leonard felt his heart skip, his eyes grazed over you before he cleared his throat, “Are you Lt. Commander (Y/L/N)?”
“Yes I am, may I ask-”
“Leonard McCoy, CMO.” he stated gruffly before you could even finish your question, trying to push down the reaction he felt when he made eye contact with you. He didn’t need to feel anything for anyone right now. He had a job to do dammit and that job didn’t involve any sort of personal relationships.
“Oh.” You briefly looked down at your feet, the solid exterior slightly putting you off after the semi-sweet first impression he had going for him. “Well, if the CMO had to come all the way down to the greenhouse for me then it must be important. How can I be of service?” You moved closer to him, away from all the plants, and suddenly he could smell the florals on you. 
Oh god. Leonard definitely didn’t want to answer that last question. The images of you bent over that ungodly sized planter was almost enough to do him in. He didn’t know what was going on with him. “You’re late for your 6 month physical, and typically I wouldn’t hunt down a patient over something like this but you’re over a month late and you’re the last one.”
“A month?” You had to keep yourself from screeching, “I am so sorry. I can be up there first thing tomorrow morning? What time would you like me to be at med bay?”
Leonard scoffed, “Are you serious?”
“Very much so. Why would you think that I wasn’t being serious?” You looked up at him, before sitting at your desk and pulling up your schedule. “I’m assuming that 0600 is probably too early,” and Leonard couldn’t agree more, he would need to be wide awake when dealing with you. “I’ll be having my lunch around 1300 tomorrow, does that time work with you Doctor?”
Leonard felt a hitch in his breathing at the use of his title. Breathing has never been this hard for him, even when he thought he was head over heels for Jocelyn, “T-that works just fine with me, and I promise not to take up your entire lunch.”
“I’ll hold you to that Doc.” you winked at him and he watched as you added the appointment into your daily schedule. Leonard cleared his throat once again and quickly turned, leaving you back in the serene peace of the greenhouse. Realizing the time you started packing up your things, making your rounds through the nursery and checking all the levels one more time just to be safe.
***********************
Leonard had a hard time sleeping. You had a 3 minute conversation and yet you were now consuming his dreams. He kept getting pieces of what he saw last night flooding his mind as he had down time in med bay.
Checking your pulse he couldn’t ignore the feeling of your heartbeat increasing ever so slightly. “You sure you’re feeling okay Darlin.?” He couldn’t help but notice the blush that spread across your skin, covering your cheeks and nose. 
His fingers still resting on your carotid, you looked up at him from the examination bed you were currently sitting on, your eyes wide and playful, “I’m not too sure Dr. McCoy, that’s why I came to see you.”
“Is that right?” Leonard mused as he held eye contact with you, his hand slowly moving to grasp your neck, his thumb gently brushing against your lower lip-
“Bones!” Leonard was snapped out of relishing his dreams by Jim, yelling his name and flapping around his arms like he was on fire. Truth be told he didn’t even see his best friend walk in.
“Jim, what is so important that you had to come and bother me during the middle of the day?”
Jim softly slumped in the chair in front of his friend, feigning hurt at the abrupt shutdown of his antics. “So, did you make that house call?” Jim couldn’t help the smile that crept on his face. Being close to the both of you only made it easier for Jim to plan the beginning of this masterpiece.
Leonard hummed to himself, mulling over the question his friend had asked, “I did, in fact the Lt. Commander agreed to come in for their physical exam later today.” Leonard released almost a half smile as he thought of seeing you again.
“That's all?” Jim had stared at the man before him bewildered. “Bones! I was trying to set you up together! You’d be perfect for each other, and you never know, (Y/N) could be your-”
Leonard could already see where Jim was going with this and he didn’t need another lecture on his love life from Jim, “You know I’ve given up on that, besides…”
“Besides?” Jim waved his hand in the air, trying to coax the last of the sentence out of him.
“She’s only 24, Jim,” he lowered his voice, “What would everyone think of me? They’d never let me speak at the Academy again!”
“Bones, she’s a grown woman who can make her own decisions. Even if nothing happens between the two of you, you could still use another friend. I mean when I’m all you got,” Jim gestured up and down his and shook his head. “It must be rough for you.”
“Thank you for that Jim. Now please, leave my office.” Leonard started on the paperwork he had waiting for him, not even really minding if Jim stayed, as long as he dropped the subject of you.
“Yeah, it probably is time for me to be somewhere else. I’m serious Bones, Maybe just try and get to know (Y/N) outside of the med bay. I think you’d be in for a pleasant surprise.”
Leonard couldn’t help but roll his eyes, ignoring the pit in his stomach as the scenes of you unburied themselves in his mind.
*******************
As much as you tried to focus on the report in front of you, you couldn’t help but think of the gruff doctor who visited you last night. The goosebumps that covered your body whenever he maintained eye contact with you made you want to jump him. A shiver rolled down your back as you were reminded of the southern drawl that hung in the air after he called you that damned nickname. Darlin’. Sighing you ran a hand down your face, trying anything to pull your thoughts away from the doctor who made a special late night trip just for you. 
“(Y/N) is everything okay?” Spock was now in front of your desk.
You let a tired smile hang on your lips and you rolled your eyes as the vulcan was still trying to decipher what human emotion you were feeling, “Just feeling a little worn down with the pace I’ve been holding the past couple months. I should probably try to slow down sooner than later.”
“Did Dr. McCoy find you last night?” Spock was now staring intently as you almost choked on the sip of coffee you were trying to enjoy. 
“I didn’t even know I missed the physical exam, how did you?” You stared back with the same intensity as your vulcan friend, before he finally caved.
“He almost ran over me getting on the turbolift looking for you. Apparently Captain Kirk was supposed to inform you it was due and Dr. McCoy suggested the captain had been avoiding telling you just get one over on our Chief Medical Officer.”
“Sounds like something James would do,” you ended the conversation and Spock was almost at the door before you spoke up again, “Commander Spock, I was hoping to take a few personal days at the end of this week. I can make sure everything is set and running on its own, but it’s…” you hesitated, not wanting to say the words out loud. It was crazy to you, still being affected by a day like this. To everyone else but you, two days from now would just be a regular work day. You cleared your throat, wanting to try to make it through the sentence without unleashing too many human emotions on the vulcan you held near and dear. Forgetting that if anyone understood what you were feeling, it would be Spock. “It’s her birthday.”
“I understand Lt. Commander. I also have times where the pain seems all too fresh. Your personal days are granted,  just send them to me in a formal request so we have the documentation.” You nodded your head in agreement, double checking the time, you were surprised just how fast it passed, and if you hurried, you could bring a coffee for the doctor.
Walking into med bay you held the hot coffee in your hand and smiled at the nurse who greeted you, you recognized her as Nurse Chapel, she did the exams for your transfer to the USS Enterprise. “I have an appointment with Dr. McCoy.” 
She smiled at you from the sign in desk and handed you a PADD to start filling out some general information on. “I am sure glad to see you Lt. Commander, Dr. McCoy has been going a little bit overboard trying to make sure everyone’s physicals are up to date. You’re the last one left.”
“Well hopefully once this is over Dr. McCoy can finally find something to help him relax.” You smiled at her as you handed the PADD back, she led you to a quiet exam room and assured you that the doctor would be in to see you in just a few minutes. You could feel the slight downward pull at the corners of your mouth as you glanced at the cup in your hand. “Please let Dr. McCoy know not to keep me waiting too long, unless he enjoys cold coffee.” Nurse Chapel laughed before patting your hand and walking out of the room.
You didn’t like med bay, hospitals, or anything that had to do with patching people up and hoping you’re fixing them. The white sterile room bringing up feelings of uneasiness. You looked around, setting the coffee down next to the PADD that was already in the room and taking a seat on the exam room bed. Sitting on the edge with your legs dangling you watched the clock on the wall tick. 
After two minutes of staring at the clock on the wall your comm went off. “Lt. Commander (Y/L/N)?”
You knew what it was, you had been eating lunch with Spock every day for the last 6 months. “I’m still in med bay, my appointment was until 1300 so I’m here just a little bit early. I promise as soon as i’m done here-”
Your voice faded out as Leonard walked into the room. “I’ll let you know when I am done in med bay Commander Spock.” Your eyes locked with Leonard as he stood in the doorway to the exam room, politely waiting for you to finish your conversation. Once he had your full attention you looked back at him giving a sheepish smile as he walked into the room. “I made you a coffee. It’s a flat white.” You gave a soft sigh as you revel in your thoughts for a moment. 
Leonard took in a breath when he saw the perfect white dot sitting in the caramel colored foam. “Flat whites are my favorite,” he turned to you as he took the first sip of his coffee. You were sure you were still in a dream when you saw the corners of Leonard's eyes scrunch, followed by a deep hum in his chest. Your eyes flicked down to his torso, admiring how the blue shirt clung to his broad shoulders. Following the lines of his body down you watched how his chest flexed as he turned to reach for the PADD behind him. 
“So, it says here you’re a month due for a physical exam. You’ve been on several away missions in the last 6 months, if you keep going at this pace you’re probably going to have to get a physical every 3 months.”
You couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle, quickly apologizing once you saw the frown reappear on his face, “My apologies Doctor, it was just funny to me how I mentioned to Commander Spock that I needed to slow down. I’m not as spry as I was in my academy days.” 
Leonard couldn’t help but let out a deep laugh at your comment, “(Y/N) you’re 24, you’re still young and spry.”
“Dr. McCoy I was officially accepted into Starfleet Academy at 12, I have a PhD in botanical sciences and I’m the youngest person to achieve the rank of Lt. Commander in the last 25 years. I haven’t slowed down. I cut my month long shore leave down to 3 days to be transferred from the USS Scovil to the Enterprise. How many away missions have I been on?”
“43,”
“That’s 7 a month for the last 6 months. Honestly, Spock is surprised I didn’t end up down here sooner.”
“So am I, some of those away missions ended up hostile, how did you just dip under the radar?” Leonard was now taking the time to read through most of the reports on file for you. He didn’t even realize you had been on any of these, without any checkups in between.
“My mom was Captain (Y/M/N) (Y/L/N).” The prestige of her name floated through the room and you watched as Leonard took what brief information he had about you and put the pieces together, “I’ve been training in hand to hand combat since I could walk. I am perfectly capable of defending myself with every weapon on this ship. I’ve taken on Spock and won.”
Leonard was now standing in front of you, gently pressing his fingers to your neck, staring at the watch he still wore on his wrist, “What’s the deal with you guys anyway? Ya know the people on this ship don’t know how to keep anything to themselves, they like to whisper.”
“You should have heard what they were saying about Jim and I after he hugged me on the bridge in front of everyone,” you wanted to sigh at the feeling of his skin on yours, a tingling sensation seemed to linger wherever he touched you, “With Spock it’s different. We both have the same mark, like matching same sides, not opposite sides. One night I was studying for the Academy and prepping for my dissertation. I had a few and ended up laying on my balcony outside pondering the woes of life. It was the first time Spock told me I was his best friend, and I made a stupid joke about how we were halfmates. That was 5 years ago.” A fond giggle fell from your lips as Leonard removed his fingers. 
He pulled out his tricorder and started scanning you, “I know it’s weird for people to see a vulcan and a human so close, but that night Spock explained to me that finding someone with the same mark as you was almost as rare as finding your soulmate.”
A scoff fell out of the doctor’s mouth as he motioned for you to lay back, pulling out a hologram screen to run a full body scan, “You actually believe in all that bullshit?”
You could feel a blush creeping up your neck, you felt like you were on fire under his hazel gaze, “Yeah. My parents were, and from what I remember they were always so happy, my dad never remarried. He was her #1.  On and off the ship. I see the same thing in the way Spock and Uhura look at each other when the other isn’t looking. I hear the way Sulu talks about his husband. Besides,” you waved your hand in the air, needed to catch your breath as the doctor held your gaze, “They’re a soulmate, if I don’t find them in this lifetime, I’ll find them in the next.”
You wanted to disappear, watching the look on Leonard’s face morph ever so slightly into a different emotion as you explained yourself. You couldn’t help yourself from flickering your eyes down to his slightly parted lips. Never have you ever wanted to kiss someone as badly as you wanted to reach up and kiss Dr. McCoy right now.
“I guess I’ve never thought of it like that,” Leonard spoke his thoughts out loud while he looked at the reports that had generated in front of him. “I was married, she wasn’t my soulmate, but I loved her. Thought she loved me too. I think she did at one point, but from what I’ve heard, nothing’s the same after you meet “the one.”” Leonard placed air quotes and he turned to look at you, “You’re clear to go. Everything looks great.”
You sat up and Leonard offered a hand to help you down, “Thank you for the coffee, I’ve dreamt of having a coffee that good since we’ve been on this floating tin can.”
You couldn’t help but let a smile grace your features, “Thank you, it feels really great to be complimented on something that doesn’t revolve around my work  for the Federation.”
“Anytime Darlin’” Leonard let go of your hand to open the door, leading you back out to the med bay waiting area.
“I guess I’ll see you in 6 months,” you couldn’t help how your smile slightly faltered as you realized your time with Dr. McCoy was coming to an end.
“If you go on that away mission next week, then I expect to see you much sooner than that.” His eyes scanned your features, his hand still resting on the small of your back.
Thankfully the waiting room was empty and even though it was your second time meeting this man all you could think about was how intoxicating he was. His eyes seemed to drink you up, he smelled like whiskey and spice, like cinnamon and anise, and your back, it was still tingling from where his hand last rested. “Then I promise you will see me sooner than six months, Doctor.” Noticing how Leonard seemed like you hit the pause button after you used the title, it almost looked as if he was short-circuiting. 
You glanced at the time, noticing you only had half of your lunch hour left. Spock! You stepped away from Leonard and smoothed out your uniform. “Thank you for taking the time to see me today, and for informing me last night,” You gave him a soft smile, “Maybe I can bring you another coffee sometime.” 
Your nerves grew as you watched Leonard fold his arms over his chest before you saw a twinkle in his eye, “I think I would like that very much.”
“Great! Sounds like a date!” You called over your shoulder, you didn’t see the way Leonard flinched at the word ‘date, or the way he stared after you for a couple seconds longer than he should have.
**********************************
4 months later and you now had a pretty solid routine going, you and Leonard were spending more time together, mostly due to you. Every Friday morning you would meet him in his office, coffee in hand and the two of you would sit and talk about work, while you approved reports from the following night. This was an easy transition for you, and on fridays you couldn’t meet, it almost felt like you were going through withdrawals until you saw him again.
This Friday was different. The previous night you ended up spiking a fever along with a few other symptoms like chills and nausea. Spock knew you didn’t like the med bay but he also trusted you enough to know he wouldn’t need to restrain and carry you up to med bay, unlike the Captain. So he sent you away and let you know to contact him in the morning about how you were feeling.
From the second you opened your eyes it felt like someone had laid a 50lb dumbbell on your skull. All lights and sound hurt, even the dim lights around the floor in your cabin had you digging around, looking for a pair of sunglasses. You reached for your comm, “Commander Spock, are you awake?”
“Lt Commander, you know you can call me Spock when we are off duty.” There was a brief moment of silence before he started speaking again, “(Y/N) why are you whispering?”
“I have a migraine, and while my fever is gone for now, the nausea hasn’t subsided at all. I’m calling out sick today.” You chuckled as you reminisced the last time you fell ill during the course of your friendship with Spock. It was the week before you graduated with your PhD, he didn’t believe it when you didn’t show up to class at the Academy. He came home, expecting you to be out, prematurely celebrating your success. Instead he found you quite literally on death’s door. Meningitis, you had ignored the symptoms for about a week, something that Spock continuously lectured you on during your multiple day stent in the ICU. 
“If it gets any worse, I promise I will have you come drag me to med bay if need be.” It took all you could not to wince while you tried to smile at Spock through your comm, hoping he could hear the smile in your voice and not worry too much.
“I look forward to your recovery (Y/N), I don’t know how long I can handle Jim by myself.” The vulcan let out a very human sigh, and you felt a twinge of guilt roll through you as Spock went silent on the other end. 
“I promise Spock, I’m not going to let a migraine and some small stomach bug take me out. I’m resilient.” You turned off your comm before pulling the sunglasses off and laying back down in your bed, already exhausted just from walking across the room. You slowly sank back into your sheets, pulling both a pillow over your eyes and your comforter past your head, trying to drown out any ray of light that could attempt to sneak in.
******************
Leonard was becoming worried, you weren’t ever late for your friday coffee meetings. That’s what Leonard considered them. Meetings, you sat together, always drinking a new drink or new coffee from some of the friendlier planets in the solar system. Leonard was amazed when you told him about the multiple coffee plants you had in the greenhouse, hoping to one day be able to cultivate them. They were meetings, always revolving about what the other did the previous week or what new thing was currently bogging down your workload. Leonard was a gentleman, he wouldn’t consider the friday morning coffee ritual as a date, he had never formally asked you on a date, and at this point it was clear to him you didn’t seem very interested in taking this friendship any further than that. Just friends.
He debated walking back out into the waiting area to see if you were there. You didn’t even sign in on Fridays anymore, after the first couple weeks you would just walk into his office, coffee in hand, PADD tucked to your side. His thoughts were brought back to the conversation you had last week.
“Morning,” You greeted as you walked into his office, Leonard immediately noticed you looked off. Leonard didn’t know if he could tell because he was trained in recognizing the signs of when someone was sick or if he had just been around you enough to notice the subtle differences. You hair was thrown into a low bun, you seemed to be more slouched and you looked as if you were walking through mud. 
“Mornin’ Darlin’” Leonard echoed your sentiment back as you pulled one of the chairs from in front of his desk so you were sitting right beside him. A yawn pulled itself from you as you sat the mugs down on the desk. 
“It’s hot chocolate today,” you looked down at your hands, suddenly bashful at the thought of disappointing him with no coffee in sight, “I just don’t think I can handle the caffeine today, it’s practically the only thing I’ve consumed the past 4 days and I wanted something to make me feel better,” you were almost whispering at the end of your sentence. 
Leonard wrapped his arm around you as laid your head on his shoulder, finding solace in the crook of his neck. You were so still and quiet he could have convinced himself you had fallen asleep if it weren’t for the feeling of your eyelashes brushing the exposed skin of his neck every couple of seconds. He noticed how pale you looked, the dark circles forming under your eyes. 
He wanted to lecture you about taking care of yourself. You should know how much sleep you should be getting, but he couldn’t bring himself to say anything. He knew it wasn’t what you needed. He was okay being your comfort at this moment, Lord knows you’ve done it plenty of times for him. Sneaking into his quarters after hours to listen to him rant after a particularly long day, He fell asleep on your lap once, he awoke to a note from you. It was an emergency, some ensign removed the wrong plant from the nursery and potentially exposed the entire staff in the greenroom to a noxious gas the plant emitted when it wasn’t mature enough to be transferred out of the nursery.
“Len,” You mumbled against his neck. He couldn’t help the way his heart swelled at the nickname. He hummed in response to you, “I grew the cocoa beans used to make that hot chocolate and if you don’t drink it I might actually cry from exhaustion. He couldn’t help the involuntary chuckle that bubbled out of him. He grabbed his mug as you sat up again, taking a sip, it was the best hot chocolate he had ever had the pleasure of drinking. He watched as you pulled out your PADD, checking the cameras in the greenhouse, before standing abruptly. 
“I have to go. I’m so sorry but if that ensign is about do what I think he’s doing then I could lose almost a year's worth of research!” You moved so fast you forgot all about the hot chocolate, leaving your favorite mug on his desk. 
Leonard still had the mug, he hadn’t been able to find an appropriate time to drop by your quarters to return it, but he also didn’t want to intrude on your work. You always made sure to come in before the med bay opened and unless you were getting back from an away mission, you didn’t hang around the med bay waiting for the chance of a quiet moment with Leonard. It was quite pleasant for him actually. Knowing that you could both go off and do your jobs, before reconnecting with each other gave him confidence in your relationship, friendship. He means friendship. 
Leonard wiped the tired from his eyes once again before stepping out of his office. Ready to take on the day, his light just slightly dulled this morning without his ball of sunshine bounding through the door before his work had to begin. Today was going to be a long day. He grimaced, his frown deepening and the lines on his forehead etching themselves a permanent figure of the day. 
**************************
It was finally lunch time, and Leonard had made up his mind hours before that he was going to use his lunchtime wisely and find you. His first stop was the green house, a couple of science officers were around as well as a handful of ensigns. He had walked the perimeter of the greenhouse, not finding you anywhere, not that he needed to look. Most of the time he just knew if you were somewhere. He was always able to find you. Even at the lavish holiday party the captain held for everyone Leonard was able to find you within minutes. He stayed by your side the whole night. He even danced with you a couple of times.
Lost in his thoughts he didn’t notice he caught the attention of Commander Spock until it was too late. “Dr. McCoy, is there anything I can help you with?” 
McCoy had a sinking feeling in his gut when he lifted his head up and saw Spock sitting at your desk, reading down a thorough check list to be completed by the end of the day. “I’m just looking for (Y/N). We usually do coffee in the morning on Fridays but they didn’t show up today. At all. Usually they’ve already contacted me and we would have rescheduled.” Leonard was still unsure how much he could trust the Vulcan so he wasn’t willing to go into further detail than that.
“(Y/N) has told me about the early morning rendezvous with you. They greatly appreciate them.” Spock straightened himself, separating the emotions from the conversation. “Lt. Commander (Y/L/N) is sick. I sent them to their quarters yesterday after they developed a fever. Today they told me their symptoms were a migraine and nausea. They are extremely prone to migraines, most days the Lt. Commander can just work through them,”
“(Y/N) is sick?” It’s not that Leonard didn’t believe the vulcan but he had even seen Spock sick during this last year on the ship, but you hadn’t even visited med bay once with even a case of the sniffles. Hell, because of Jim, even he had to be quarantined at least once in the last three months, “Any other symptoms I need to know about?”
“Not that I am aware of Dr. McCoy. However it seems the Lt. Commander’s migraines have become slightly more frequent in the last couple of months.”
Leonard took a mental note of what the vulcan was saying and his next mission was to get to your quarters. He had noticed last week you didn’t look like your usual self, now he was kicking himself for not pushing you to get checked out. He let his emotions for you get the better of him and he just focused on finding you. He was the CMO. He shouldn't be letting romantic emotions cloud his judgment when it comes to patient care.
Arriving at your door, Leonard gave a brief knock, waiting in the silence of the corridor to hear you call out, but there was no response, he tried his comm, “Lt. Commander (Y/L/N), Commander Spock informed me you were sick, I’m here to just make sure you’re doing okay.” No response, remembering the last time your comm went silent, a shudder ran through Leonard. 
Another away mission, Jim said he confirmed the planet was abandoned, the only forms of life the Enterprise found were plant and animal life. Of course that turned out to not be the case and soon everything went to shit. Leonard already had his hands full with red shirts needing stitched up when everything stopped. 
Jim and Sulu bust through the med bay doors, your limp body being held up by the two of them, “She was walking just a few seconds ago, but now she’s limp!” He watched Jim’s pleading eyes flickering around for anyone who was available to help. Spock was following behind and when it seemed like Jim and Sulu were about to lose their battle with supporting your dead weight, Spock stepped in and scooped you up. Cradling you in his arms like a child.
Leonard couldn’t do anything for the first 30 seconds, watching the way your body just hung there, no movement from you except the extremely quick and labored breathing you were exhibiting. He fully didn’t know what he was doing until he just left the red shirt sitting in front of him, having one of the nurses continue the stitches he was currently working on. When he finally reached you, it was hard to determine what blood was yours and what wasn’t.
Spock laid you on the closest open bed and Leonard began scanning you, with not only his tricorder but his eyes as well. He placed two fingers on your neck and closed his eyes, ignoring the tingling that started small in his fingertips and worked its way up his arm. Your pulse was strong and the sense of relief Leonard felt was strong enough to clear his head, though he still had to focus to not drop to his knees. 
Looking at the PADD with your scans, he had to have looked visibly confused, because both Spock and Jim had tried to peek over his shoulder to read your medical information on the device in his hand. “She has no external injuries, and I can’t find any internal bleeding. What happened out there?”
Jim spoke first, “It was an ambush, they were waiting to show themselves until we hit the ground. (Y/N) had already made a break for the treeline, she was looking for a specific plant. They came out of nowhere, and Scotty was trying to beam us all out but he couldn’t get a steady signal on (Y/N). They were engaged in battle, 3 on 1. It didn’t stop until she-” Jim suddenly stopped his account of what happened on the foreign planet, almost too afraid to finish his sentence. 
“We were finally able to get a steady signal and beamed them to the transporter, only after Lt, Commander (Y/L/N) had been thrown into a tree,” Spock finished for the Captain.
“I could have taken them if Scotty and Chekov hadn’t been yelling in my ear the entire time.” You slowly opened your eyes, bracing yourself for how bright the room surrounding you would be. “And it was 4 on 1 James.” There it was again, you were the only person who could get away with calling the Captain by his government name. 
The breath Leonard didn’t know he was holding released as he made his way to your side, “From what I heard, you kicked ass down there.” 
A sheepish smile was your response, he didn’t know why, but he needed to be close to you, he would have sat down on the bed and pulled you into his chest if he didn’t have his current audience. “You hit your head pretty hard (Y/N), and while it doesn’t look like a concussion I want to see you back here in 3 days just to make sure nothing else is going on.”
Leonard was pulled back into the present by your door opening, and there you were, gorgeous. Leonard couldn’t help the small smile he felt when he looked down at you. Noticing the way your messy locks fell around your face and the out of regulation pajamas you were wearing. The dark circles under your eyes more prominent now than they were last week.
“Len, what are you doing here?” You shielded your eyes from the brightness of the hallway. Wincing in pain when you tried looking up at him.
“Spock told me you were sick. I came to check on you.” A soft shrug from him and he didn’t miss how you seemed too tired to even roll your eyes at your boss for ratting you out to the CMO. You motioned at him with your hand before turning and walking back into your quarters. 
Leonard had never actually been inside your living space until now, and he couldn’t help but feel immediately at home. Photos hung on your walls, photos of you from medical school, at the academy, there was one that caught his eye immediately. You and Jim, while both younger than you are now, were instantly recognizable. Jim was holding you on his shoulders, you held your PhD in your hand. Your joy in the photo emanating into the real world. Then he saw it, your mark. 
Perfectly placed inside your wrist, he stepped closer, he could hear his blood swishing in his ears as he finally put two and two together. There it was, staring at him. He now had proof that his entire life you had been the one he was waiting for. An uneasy feeling sank over him. He just needed to push everything down. He was a doctor, he had a job to do, and he wouldn't let this discovery change anything.
**********************
You watched as Leonard looked around your small apartment, he was currently observing the photos on your walls. You were tired, you laid down on your couch and pulled a blanket up past your head. Your migraine now just a dull throb at the back of your skull. You could now hear Leonard shuffling around your kitchenette. When you finally pulled the blanket down you could see him standing in front of you.
There was a mug in one hand, and a tricorder in the other. “Leonard, I promise I’m fine. It’s just a migraine.”
Leonard scoffed before setting the mug down, “According to Commander Spock, your migraines have been more frequent lately, he also mentioned a fever and nausea.”
“Spock can’t keep his damn mouth shut can he?” You replied before moving into a sitting position and allowing the doctor to scan you. You hummed as his hand brushed across your wrist, immediately finding the spot to check your pulse.
“I was worried about you, ya know,” Leonard softly spoke. “When you didn’t show up this morning I knew something was wrong,” his sentence ended in a mumble of words. You couldn’t help but reach up and place a hand on his cheek. 
“I apologize for making you worry, Doctor.” This time, you could feel his jaw slightly clench and you watched his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed. 
“(Y/N),” you noticed he was closer now, hovering mere inches from your face. 
“Yes Leonard?” You could hear the catch in your breath as you spoke. His breath fanned across your face, the mintiness from brushing his teeth still lingering. The proximity of being so close had your heart going crazy and you couldn’t seem to think straight. As quickly as the moment started, he ended it. Pulling away and tucking his tricorder into his hip. 
“Well, everything seems fine, and nothing is broken.” He made his way to your door. “Drink the tea, and take it easy for the next couple of days,” and with that he opened the door and walked away.
******************************
You hadn’t seen Leonard for two weeks, even on your last away mission he had someone else do you exam. He wouldn’t even come out of his office while you were in med bay. The daily throb in your heart of the rejection didn’t stop your stride but it definitely slowed it. You were second guessing yourself and you couldn’t seem to focus unless you had someone else to hold you accountable. You slept more these days, not being able to stay late in the greenhouse for the fear that your mind would start to wander and then you had your heart breaking all over again.
Sitting in the mess hall with Spock at lunch you were approached by an ensign. A yellow shirt, and when you looked behind him, you could see Sulu intently watching the interaction unfolding in front of him. “Lt Commander (Y/L/N), I was hoping I could invite you to the party we’re having tonight.”
You smiled up at him, intending to find a way to gently let him down, when the unsuspecting doctor walked into the mess hall, and you couldn’t help but smirk, motioning him closer to you, you decided to just be honest, “Listen kid, I’m sure you’re great, but someone already has my heart.” You watched their face slightly falter, “However, they’re too stubborn to admit it, help me make him jealous and I think I can talk to the Captain about your incredible performance.” 
You weren’t expecting the quick nod of their head or the salute they sent your way from the table, keeping the smile on your face, you couldn’t help but laugh as Spock finally made eye contact with you. “I don’t see how you attending a party with a member from the flight crew could in any way make Dr. McCoy jealous.” 
You could hear the ensign talking to Sulu as Dr. McCoy passed their table, “She said yes!” The ensign looked back over at you and waved, you made sure an enthusiastic smile was planted on face as you waved back, pretending not to feel Leonard’s glare boring into you as you turned back to Spock, “Just like that Commander Spock.” The vulcan couldn’t help the sigh of disappointment. Why must the two of you make things so complicated?
       “Lt. Commander, wouldn’t it just be easier to tell Dr. McCoy, how you feel about him?” 
     You sighed, eyes bouncing around the room before landing down at the plate of replicated food in front of you, “I wish. He’s been avoiding me for 2 weeks now. Hell, the other day I helped another science officer to med bay and he wouldn’t even look at me,” you shrugged your shoulders before collecting your belongings, “I think maybe I should turn my affections elsewhere as Dr. McCoy has made it clear to me that he would no longer like a friendship with me, let alone a romantic relationship.” You turned on your heel, already done with the conversation and quite frankly done with the way your thoughts were constantly brought back to the man who wanted nothing to do with you.
     You didn’t even see Leonard approach your table at the end of your conversation with Spock, determined to outrun the wave of emotions you could feel rising up in your chest. 
******************
    The party was great, it really was, but you felt so out of place. Parties weren’t usually your thing and the ensign who asked you to the party quickly forgot about you as soon as you defended Spock in the middle of a heated conversation. Sulu ended up having to coax you away from the group as the insults toward your best friend kept coming, and you quickly rolled up your sleeves. 
“Hey, you’re okay, anyone who really knows Spock knows that he’s actually a really great guy.” Sulu rubbed your arm as he led you to the bar. “Plus, it would be a little uncomfortable to end up in med bay right now.”
You scoffed and could help the incredulous look you gave him, “I wouldn’t have ended up anywhere but my cabin. The best part is none of them would have even known who I was until Captain Kirk inevitably got involved, and I also know that James would throw himself on top of a live grenade for me.”
Sulu couldn’t help but roll his eyes at you before handing you one of the drinks he ordered, “You and the captain are close too?” 
“Yeah, he’s like an older brother. My mom and his dad were close, so he was over all the time when we were younger, he’s the one who pushed me to apply for my doctorate degree and even filled out a couple of applications behind my back, and he protected me more than once from creeps when he would sneak me into the bar with him.” You downed another drink the drink and looked at the crowd opposite of where you currently were, “I could still take him,” 
“How many of those have you had tonight?” Sulu nodded at the empty glass in your hand.
You shrugged, setting the glass back down on the bar, “I lost count about 30 minutes ago.”
The comment earned you another laugh from the man beside you and suddenly your comm went off, “Lt. Commander! It’s great to see you here!” Your head suddenly turned into a swivel as you scanned the party, looking for the biggest pain in your ass you had ever met. Someone grabbed your shoulder from behind you and reflexively threw them over you to the ground, before placing a foot on their chest to keep them on the ground.
The laugh that followed had smoke coming out of your ears and suddenly you were a teenager again, “Chekov! Don’t do that!” You couldn’t help but stomp your foot on the ground, “I could have hurt you!”
“Did you just stomp your foot? Are you throwing a tantrum right now?” You helped Chekov off the ground and you noticed how he had been grinning the entire time.
“How am I supposed to get any peace on this ship when I have a gaggle of men I have to constantly keep from killing themselves?” You feigned anger and dramatically threw your hand back to your forehead. 
“Well, who else would keep us in check if we didn’t have you?” The puppy dog eyes from both Sulu and Chekov broke past your resolve and you pulled both of them into a hug. Kissing both of them on the top of the head before pulling away.
“Who’s gonna take care of you when I’m gone? I’m 25 now, in my prime, someone could wife me up right now and I’d be whisked away in a flurry of love and babies.” You watched the horror spread over their faces and you couldn’t help but feel proud of yourself.
Chekov quickly dropped to one knee and you couldn’t help the feeling of embarrassment that filled you, a pit in your stomach forming and even with the threatening look on your face, the ensign didn’t move off the ground, “Well, if you’re going to get married, I think we both,” he paused and nodded at Sulu who couldn’t help the comical smile on his face as he stared at the scene unfolding in front of him. “Would prefer if you did get married that you wouldn’t be whisked away from us.”
You couldn’t help but laugh, the first real laugh you had experienced in weeks, and soon you were laughing so hard you had tears pricking at the back of your eyes, “You’re really taking marrying up to a whole new level,” you dropped into a squat, resting your body weight on your balls of your feet as you got within eye level of your friend, “You’re drunk Chekov, you wouldn’t remember this in the morning if you wanted too.” You gently pushed on him back by his forehead, as you expected Chekov, who was extremely drunk for this early in the night, fell backwards. What you didn’t expect was him flailing, grabbing you, and throwing you down the stairs from the bar after him. 
Everything that happened next was in fast forward as a group of people were on both of you, you could feel your face flush with embarrassment. As swiftly as the embarrassment settled, the overstimulation was sudden and you were going to freak out. There were too many people, people were trying to touch you, some trying to help you up, and everyone was speaking at once. You closed your eyes, you could feel an ache in your head, and something warm in your hair. You could hear James shuffling through the crowd, using his captain's voice to part the sea of swarming people. 
“(Y/N) are you okay?” You were lifted to your feet, wincing as he put pressure on your shoulder. James instantly repositioned the way he was supporting you. You quickly looked around and saw Chekov, he came bounding over to you as soon as you were up.
“Chekov, are you okay?” You reached up and started inspecting him, which earned you a laugh.
“I just tucked and rolled!” He spun in front of you as if to prove his point. 
“Yeah,” you suddenly noticed the pain in your shoulder was growing, “Wish I got a heads up,” you couldn’t help but laugh with the ensign and you rested most of your weight against your longest known friend. 
“(Y/N) you’re bleeding. From your head. We gotta go.” 
You looked up at him, trying to pull your best puppy dog eyes through the growing pain, “But James, it just got fun!”
“Remember when you said that after your commissioning?”
You groaned, you had been trying to forget about that night since it happened, you got drunk. Totally wasted with James at a surprise party he threw for you , cheering you on and even challenging you to go shot for shot. You fell off the second story balcony, thankfully into bushes, but nevertheless walked away with a concussion and a pretty nasty bruise that consumed most of your lower back. “Fine, let’s go.”
*********************
Jim regretfully walked you to med bay, he wondered if this is what he put Bones through everytime he got sick or injured, “What is going on with you tonight?”
“I really don’t want to go to med bay and I really really don’t want to see Leonard McCoy.” You automatically imitated the grumpy doctor, even furrowing your brows like he would.
“I thought you two were friends?” What had he missed, the last time Bones had talked about you, he thought the two of you had something, it was the most he had seen his friend smile in, well, the entire time he had known him.
You bellowed a dry, sarcastic laugh, “Yeah, me too.” You looked away from him, suddenly more interested in the floor than the conversation you were having, “I thought we could have been more,” you whispered under your breath. 
Jim stopped walking, turning your head so he could look you in the eyes, “(Y/N), Bon- Leonard is a complicated man. He doesn’t always know what’s best for him right away. Even when the best thing to happen to him is right in front of him.”
You shook your head, trying to break the look Jim was giving you, “No, it’s my fault. I thought he was going to kiss me. I read the signs all wrong, and now he hasn’t talked to me in 16 days, and now I’ve ruined a perfectly good friendship.” 
Jim wiped away a tear that started sliding down your cheek, pulling you into his chest and kissing the top of your head. You gently sobbed into his chest, trying to be quiet in the corridor with a few people still bustling around you. His heart breaking at seeing you this heartbroken. He had been there for other break ups, most of the time you rationalized it, even to him. 
‘It wasn’t meant to be’ was after Chandler, a snotty rich kid who tried desperately to buy his way into your pants. He tried using his dad’s rank to intimidate you, trying to use the power of someone else to make you do what he wanted. Even after you had broken things off, there were some nights you would still sleep on Jim’s couch, afraid to go back to your dorm. He wasn’t a problem for you much longer.
“She just wasn’t the one,” was after Savannah. Someone who you remained in contact with to this day. You were there when Savannah got her dream job, she thanked you in her speech when she graduated top of her class, and most importantly you were her daughter’s godmother. Every shore leave, every break from school, you made her and her family one of your top priorities. Jim had even seen you leave study groups or parties just to go spend time with her.
“My soulmate is still out there,” Was after Ashton. It had been a few years, Jim thought you guys were happy, but then came the inevitable. You stormed into his apartment, not even bothering to knock as there was nothing Jim was going to be doing that you hadn’t seen at least once already. He was married. You were humiliated, you didn’t go out unless you were going to school for weeks. Beating yourself up for not knowing. Jim had to remind you countless times that it wasn’t your fault, you had no idea of knowing that this man was married, hell Jim even did digging of his own after things got serious and he couldn’t find anything. 
He couldn’t help the look of pity he gave you as you pulled yourself out of his chest, wincing at the pain as he released you. “Whatever happened to the girl who could rationalize these things? Your other half is still out there,” he said softly.
More tears welled up in your eyes. You shook your head again, more violently this time, as if trying to shake the tears away. He couldn’t help but empathize with your sorrow. He would have put the pieces together himself if you had given him time, but you spoke again. “James, he is the one. And now he won’t even look at me.”
Jim’s eyes widened in disbelief. Never in the entire time of knowing you did he think you would ever say those words. It was supposed to be the two of you, lone wolves for the rest of your lives. “You really love him, don’t you?” he asked, pulling you into his side. You nodded, and he kept his arm around your ribcage for support, careful to avoid putting pressure on your shoulder. “And you should probably try to stop crying before we walk through that door.”
**********************
Walking into med bay, you couldn’t help but feel mortified at how you must look. You could feel the blood in your hair even more now, and you couldn’t even bear to lift the arm with the damaged shoulder. Not to mention how the makeup you wore for the night probably looked after you cried into James’s chest. You quickly glanced at him, stifling a laugh as you pointed at the mascara stain on the dress shirt he was currently wearing. 
“You think that’s funny?” You watched as he dramatically tried to wipe the makeup off his shirt. “Ya know, this better win me some brownie points.” 
You laughed harder at the comment, “Speaking of brownie points, I promised the ensign who asked me to the party that if he helped me make Leonard jealous I would put in a good for him with you.” You couldn’t help the dreamy smile that fell on your face just mentioning him, “Then he said Spock was an asshole and now I think we should just shoot him out into the void of space.”
“I forgot how mean you get when you drink.”
“Who else do we have tonight?” You didn’t want to turn around, the southern drawl in his voice was something you didn’t even notice how much you had missed until this very moment. You wanted to cower behind James, you wanted to run and hide. You wanted to beg James to turn around and patch you up in your quarters. Before you could speak, James did. 
“Well, I decided to throw a party and things got a little out of hand. The Lt. Commander was practically thrown down a flight of stairs. I think they have dislocated a shoulder and they’re bleeding. From the head.” 
You couldn’t stop yourself when you jabbed an elbow into his ribcage, pushing through the pain to let him know how you felt, “I’m fine, I just hurt a little bit.”
James poked you in the shoulder, using the littlest bit of pressure, causing you to rear back and stifle down a groan of pain, “You asshole!”
You didn’t miss the sigh or the eye roll from the handsome doctor in front of you, and now you were pissed. You were trying to have a good time tonight, and yet absolutely no one was able to take him off your mind, and now here you were, standing in front of him, looking like a complete mess, “Listen, you obviously don’t want me here, and quite frankly I don’t want to be here, so if you could just put my shoulder back in place so I can go away, that would be great.”  You sighed before turning away from them and finding the closest open bed, “Stop looking at me like that James, I can feel your eyes in the back of my head.” 
You couldn’t hop onto the bed without jostling everything that hurt, so you chose to plant yourself in one of the visitor chairs beside the bed. Your head resting back against the wall, closing your eyes and trying to prevent the tears trying to escape, the pain now moving toward the range of extreme and you finally touched your head. Pulling it away to inspect your fingers, there was the blood now sticky. You sighed, annoyed with the fact that showering after tonight was going to be hard.
********************************
Leonard pushed through the privacy curtain and for a couple of moments he just looked you over with his eyes. Jim had told him what happened. The thought of Chekov proposing, no matter how fake, seemed to enrage him. The thought of you with any man did that to him, not to mention the blatant flirting in the mess hall the other day. He wanted to track down the ensign who asked you to the party down, give him a piece of his mind. He wanted to let the ensign know that he shouldn’t be hitting on his woman.
But you weren’t his, were you? Jim let him know about the conversation in the hallway, how you cried after telling him how long it had been since he had been icing you out. Has it really been 16 days?  Jim told him he needed to fix it. Leonard wasn’t sure he could. How would he even go about letting you know that the only reason he was acting this way was so he didn’t break your heart. He was damaged, and had too much baggage for someone as sweet as you. He didn’t want to ruin you.
Looking at you now though, past the injuries of the night, Leonard realized that his way of trying not to cause you any harm was actually doing the most harm. Your eyes were closed, but still slightly puffy and tear streaks had etched their way onto your cheeks. The blood in your hair now drying and matting your hair together. From just looking at your current posture he wasn’t too concerned with any broken bones, but he suspected Jim was probably right about the dislocated shoulder. 
He cleared his throat to get your attention, watching closely as your eyes slightly opened. He didn’t miss the glimmer in your eye as you finally looked at him, and when you held his gaze Leonard let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in. The need to be close to you reared its head again and it took all of his self control to not sprint the short distance to you. He sat on the med bay bed so he was closer to eye level. He didn’t really know what to say. 
“Hi,”
Your eyes widened and your mouth fell open at his opening line choice. “Hi? Are you fucking kidding me? Hi?” You threw your good hand in the air, wincing from the sudden change in posture, as you whisper screamed at him. The both of you knew there was an extremely high chance Jim was trying to eavesdrop on the two of you.
“What else am I supposed to say?” Leonard almost couldn’t believe himself, who says hi?
“Maybe, I’m an ass for not talking to you for 2 weeks but let me stitch up your head.”
“I am sn sss.” 
You huffed, sitting up straighter, “Or maybe, it looks like your shoulder is dislocated, let's get it back into place and get you out of here.”
“If that’s what you want me to do.” 
“Of course I want you to fix me! Why else would I drag myself down here?”
So you wanted to fight, Leonard could do that, “Oh, so you have to drag yourself down here?”
“Right now, yeah? I literally have no other choice!”
Leonard wanted to smirk, “So you only wanted me because you had no other choice?”
You gasped and looked at the ground, “You know that’s not what I meant.” 
Leonard stood, grabbing the PADD he had with him, “I’m not the one who said it.” 
“Yeah, and I’m not the one who made me fall in love with you.” Leonard froze, just barely able to hear you, you had dropped into a barely audible whisper. Leonard didn’t know if it was from fear of saying it outloud or hoping he wouldn’t hear it.
“Yeah, well what are you going to do about that?”
He watched as your head snapped up, and if looks could kill Leonard was sure his head would have exploded right then and there, “You’ve obviously already made your choice, so maybe just get me the hell out of here and transfer my care to someone else. That way you'll never have to see me again.”
He sighed, not really wanting to do this now, but it looks like he was going to have no other choice, “(Y/N)-”
“Save it. I don’t want to hear it, now please, just fix me enough so that I can go back to my quarters and shower, I need to get this blood out of my hair.”
“(Y/N)-”
“I’m serious-”
“If you would shut up you would know that I’m in love with you too!”
Leonard had never raised his voice at you before, and the look on your face made him regret it instantly. He crouched in front of you and cradled your face in his hands, “I am so head over heels for you Darlin’” He looked into your eyes, searching for anything other than the rage they currently held, “It scared me. That night in your room, when I saw the way you were looking at me, I knew. I never wanted anyone to look at me the way you did. I panicked. I ran and hid, hoping that if I just pushed everything down for long enough then-” He sighed again, his breath feeling like a cotton ball in his throat.
******************
You were pissed. Angry at Leonard for ignoring you, angry that you were in med bay, angry that Leonard wouldn’t shut the fuck up. You were trying so hard to move past the feelings you had for him, but you always seemed to end up right back in front of him. 
“Why?” You couldn’t stop your mouth from moving, even though in this moment you desperately wanted him to shut up. You could hear how tired he was, making the southern accent more prominent, making your heart swell. 
“Well, I’m broken. Told Jim that Jocelyn took everything in the divorce. All I got is my bones.”
“So that’s where the nickname comes from? James tries so hard to call you Leonard to my face, like the nickname is a secret or something.” You could feel the way he looked at you, choosing to focus on the nickname instead of anything else he just told you. “Leonard, we can continue this conversation later, but my shoulder really hurts. Please help me.”
Leonard helped you onto the bed, and slightly straightened you up. “Um, I need to take your shirt off, I need to see-”
You couldn’t help but blush. You had thought this before, not in this context. Your fantasies usually revolved around his office, in the shower, maybe you thought about you and him in the greenhouse once or twice, but never like this, “I’m gonna need some help with that.”
Leonard slowly pulled your arm out of the sleeve, and you almost thought you could see him shaking, “Len, I’m not made of porcelain.” You could hear him release the breath he was holding, his thumb dancing over your wrist. Soon enough you were topless, you could see a bruise forming. Your shoulder felt so wrong. You almost couldn’t describe it. It felt taut like it was being pulled, but you felt like you had no control, you couldn’t shrug if you tried. 
“This is gonna hurt, according to these scans not only is your shoulder dislocated but you have a torn AC ligament.” He laid you down, placing your arm down over the edge of the bed, and quickly pulling your arm into a 90 degree angle, while rotating your arm. You felt the relief as you heard your shoulder pop back into place. Then the hypo, and if your shoulder still didn’t throb a little you would have hit Leonard.
“That’s gonna help with the pain and swelling, and this one,” He stabbed you again, “Is gonna help with that ligament, but you cannot lift anything heavier than 15 pounds until I clear you, and because this can still affect your range of motion, we’ll still have to keep a close eye on it. Usually for a dislocated shoulder we would recommend a sling, but we’re going to need movement if you want to be able to maintain your current quality of life.”
“Okay, and the treatment plan?” You sat up and gingerly pulled your shirt over your head.
“Well the fact you were able to do that is a good sign.” He took a step back from you, “Stand up and hold your arms directly out in front of you,” You did, your left arm not reaching quite as high as your right hand, “Now out to the side,” again, the left shoulder not quite as high. “Drop them to your sides and shrug,” You almost couldn’t. Trying with all of your might to move your left side up to your chin. The smallest inch of movement had you content. 
“4-6 weeks,” Leonard smashed the contentedness. “I know, it seems like a long time, but (Y/N) losing range of motion for your line of work would hinder you in more ways than one. Even with the medicine we have, we can only speed up the human body's healing time by so much. If it was any worse I would have said 8.” He took a step closer to you and took your hand in his. “Now stop pouting and let me check your head.”
*****************************************
It had been 3 days since the last time you had seen Leonard, the longest amount of time the two of you had gone since that night in med bay. You had even spent the night once or twice. However, this time you weren’t anxious about it. He didn’t consume your thoughts like before and for the first time in weeks, you finally felt like you were back in your groove. You were on the last 2 week stretch of desk duty, and not surprisingly you were spending most of the time following Spock around, or wandering around the greenhouse, trying to politely remind people that your way was the right way and you were actively writing the protocol for this.
However, right now you were moping. Looking like someone ate your candy and you couldn’t help it. Everyone who you could bother during the day was gone. A new planet, going where no man has gone before, or whatever the excuse was. You just knew you were bored and there was no one around to entertain you. You soon found yourself wandering to med bay, hoping that you could catch a moment alone with Leonard. You waved at the nurse sitting at the desk, before making your way to Leonard's office. You knocked on the door and when you didn’t hear a response you slowly opened the door.
Stepping into the office you glanced around, it was empty. You frowned even more, wanting to fold your arms over your chest and huff. You made your way back to the desk and faced the nurse. “Where’s Dr. McCoy?”
“The captain asked him to join the team going down the surface today.”
“Oh, okay. Can you let him know I stopped by? He wanted me to come down for a follow up.”
The young boy sitting behind the desk smiled at you and straightened his posture a little, “Yeah, can I get a name? Lt. Commander (Y/N). Thank you.” You smiled back before heading back out into the hallway. 
Back in the greenhouse you couldn’t stay focused, wanting to wander and more than enough times trying to sneak in and help with the rearranging currently going on. Every time someone caught you and every time they threatened to tell Spock. Eventually you conceded, holing yourself away in your office. You couldn’t help the way you stared off into literal space. Not being able to keep your mind busy with anything work related, you decided to give up. You pulled out your PADD and started drawing. Focus every bit of [ent up energy into the smallest details on the pages… 
Just wanting something to keep you busy. And you were now in a field, it looked like home. Yellow dandelions and honeysuckle sprouting up everywhere, you could feel the cool grass beneath your toes. The wind was warm and steady. The sky was cornflower blue and white wispy clouds were scattered throughout. You finally felt calm. You closed your eyes, trying to breathe in the moment. A hand grasped yours, you looked over and there he was. The man who completely consumed your dreams. You could see it. This is where you spent most of your time, the space you went to in duress. 
The image shifted, now you were in a house. Your mom’s home. It smelled exactly as you remembered. You heard the kettle on the stove and made your way to the kitchen, laughter floated through the air. The kitchen now in view, your mom was now at the counter, filling a group of mugs that sat on the counter. Behind you at the kitchen island, stood Leonard, chopping vegetables and bantering with your dad.
The image rippled behind you, changing the scenery and you were still on earth, but this was your home. The place you started and the place you would end. When you decided to move to Washington, James helped you. Packed only what you needed and took the road trip with you, only along for the memories. Your homestead spread before you. Your eyes automatically drifted to the chicken coop. Leonard was there, several of your hens grouped around his feet as he spread bird seed for them.
“I don’t think chickens would be that big of a fan of me,” You jumped as Leonard made himself known behind you. You slowly made your way to him, suddenly anxious about the interaction, “I heard you were looking for me?”
You almost forgot, you laughed to yourself before explaining, “Yeah, it wasn’t anything important. I was bored, and both James and Spock were gone! I can’t do anything with this damn arm and I needed stimulation. I didn’t know James stole you too!” You lightly hit him in the chest and scowled, “I thought we had a rule.”
The doctor suddenly looked bashful as he stared at your feet, “There was an exception to the rule,” From behind his back, he revealed a plant. It looked like a venus fly trap, but it was maroon. “ “It looks like dionaea muscipula, but I’ve never seen one this color. Or as large.” You gently cradled the propagate in your hands, breathing gently as you inspected it. “Usually 10cm is the largest they get. This one could be significantly bigger.” You finally looked up at him, tears slightly welling up in your eyes, “Thank you,” 
Suddenly you were surrounded by him. His hand on your face, his smell swirling around, and most importantly his lips on yours. They were soft, a complete contrast to the finger grazing over your cheek. You couldn’t help but smile into the kiss as you leaned into him. He wrapped his free hand around your waist and pulled you against him. You were hyper aware of the feeling of his chest against yours, you swore your breathing was in sync. 
Leonard pulled away first, deciding that air was actually a vital part of his plan to have a future with you. He rested his forehead against yours, placing a chaste kiss to your nose, “Maybe I can get used to the chickens.”
*******************************
Leonard practically dragged you out to the turbolift. Only giving you a split second to stop by the greenhouse to drop off your new favorite thing. Surprised you were able to make the short ride to his quarters without your hands all over each other. He held your hand the entire time and you couldn’t help but notice how opposite the two of you looked. Leonard with a determined look taking over his features, he was desperate to be alone with you and he couldn’t stop bouncing as you waited to arrive at the correct floor. You, on the other hand, looked completely love drunk. Still reeling from the kiss, just happy to be near him and along for the ride.
He pulled you down the hallway and you did everything you could to stay on your feet as you tripped after him. He turned back to look before picking you up, tossing you over his shoulder and he resumed his pace. You let a giggle fall out of you, hanging over his back, staring at the floor. He hummed in response, and you couldn’t help but shake your head, knowing he couldn’t see you, deciding to keep this to yourself. He stopped, arriving at his door, and soon you were in the darkness and privacy of his personal space. The room is familiar in the dim lighting from the late night visits that happened occasionally. He continued, moving to a space you had never seen before, his bedroom.
You couldn’t help the flurry you were feeling in your stomach, suddenly aware of everything around you. Taking in what the room looked like, you could definitely see Leonard in the space, it was nicely decorated. The sheets looked soft, a rich phthalo green with matching comforter. The night stands were simply decorated, with a single light on each, one of them holding a photo of he and James at the Academy. The rest of the room had small trinkets, and a couple of dirty clothes were sitting on a chair in the corner. What really caught your eye was the small purple succulent sitting on his dresser.
“You put him on your dresser?” You couldn’t help but ask, knowing he would know exactly what you were talking about. The succulent was your first surviving propagation of its kind. You had affectionately named him ‘Jim’.
“Yeah, I brought him home that very day. I’ve been following all your rules. Even had Scotty set me up special lights so the little could get the effects on sunlight.” He set you down on the bed and looked at you, before stepping forward and weaving his way between your legs, currently towering over you. You wanted to drool, you were sure this was heaven. He was kissing you again, this time deeper than before, his tongue already begging as you moved your lips against his. Ever so slightly you moved back onto the bed, slowly lying down as Leonard climbed on top of you. His hands slowly moved up your shirt and you couldn’t help but try and press your body against his hands. Trying to desperately communicate the need for his touch.
“Len,” you whispered and he looked at you. His eyes softened as he took in the sight of you, a hand coming up to cup your cheek, you couldn’t help but pull him into a hug, pulling him down until his entire body weight was on top of you. You couldn’t help the contented sigh that fell from your lips as you embraced this feeling. He felt like a weighted blanket on top of you, bringing a sense of peace with him as your breathing synced together,  “I missed you.”
“I missed you too Darlin’” Your hands grabbed the back hem of his shirt, gently tugging and trying to pull it up his body, Leonard picking up the hints. Moving off you, he finished the job you were working on, before you sat up, allowing him to pull your shirt off you. “You’re gorgeous,” again you wrapped up in a kiss, and it was everything you had been dreaming about since you met him. 
Soon enough, you were naked, your lower half dangling off the edge of the bed, Leonard stroking himself as he stared at you. You swore you could feel his eyes burning into your skin as he raked you over, looking as if he was trying to memorize every inch of your body, the adoration radiating off him made you want to cry. You couldn’t remember a time anyone had made you feel this way just from a look. You didn’t know why you were suddenly so emotional, but now you were worried you were ruining the moment. You saw Leonard’s face change as he moved toward you. 
“(Y/N)?” He scooped you up, sitting you on his lap, his thumb brushing away the one rogue tear that escaped, “What’s wrong?”
You shook your head and smiled, “Nothing, it was just the way you looked at me.” You turned around in his lap, straddling him. You slowly kissed your way around his jaw line, up to his ear before gently nibbling on his ear lobe. You kept your lips pressed to his skin as you whispered in his ear, “Now, where were we Doctor?”
You shivered as he gripped your thighs, you slowly hiked yourself up placing one hand on Leonard’s shoulder to keep yourself steady using the other to line yourselves up. You didn’t miss the way he bit down on his lip as soon as your hand wrapped around his cock. Slowly easing yourself down onto him, you slowly stretched down until your thighs were touching his, placing both arms on his shoulders as you gave a few small bounces just to adjust yourself. Adjusting your knees, you started rotating your hips while setting a steady pace as you started to spring up and down. Having to quickly adjust when Leonard dropped to his elbows, and you came with him. 
He now had the upper hand, using one arm to wrap around your waist, keeping you in place, using the other to hold your chin, maintaining eye contact as he set a brutal pace, his hips almost smashing into yours. The new angle had changed and suddenly you couldn’t stop the moan that fell from your lips, seeing a smirk appear on Leonard’s face. “You sound so pretty,” He swiped his thumb over your lips and instinctively you slightly parted your mouth, “Say my name darlin.’”
You couldn’t help the heat that burned your cheeks, deciding to try and get back at him for the compromising position he put you in, “Leona-” You didn’t get to finish his name before his hips stopped moving. His arm is still locking you in place. You wanted to pout at the sudden loss of movement but didn’t have enough time as you were on your back now. Legs resting around his hips, his free hand now gripping one of your hips, as he slowly leaned in closer.
He adjusted the way he was holding your chin, he now rested your chin in the dip between his thumb and index finger, with each holding onto your jaw and adjusting your head to look at him, “I don’t think you heard me, what’s my name?”
“Dr. McCoy,” You looked at him through lidded eyes, eyes closing at his grip on your jaw tightened for a split second, before his hand on your hip pulled you closer to him. Settling a tortuous pace as he thrust into you, hiking your hips higher up as you started thrusting up towards him, desperate for more. He slowed down for a split second, a hand coming to rest by your throat. His fingers instinctively fell on your carotid. 
“Are you sure you’re feeling okay? Your heart rate seems pretty elevated,” He softly widened his grip, his hand now resting at the base of your neck.
“I was hoping you could tell me Doctor,” Leonard leaned down close to you, his fingers already slowly inching to either side of your neck, “Are you okay with this.” 
You quickly nodded your head and wiggled your body, closer to his, “Yes Le-” You swallowed, avoiding eye contact with him, “Yes Dr, McCoy.”
He applied pressure to the sides of your throat, you tilted your head back, almost as if you were presenting your neck to him and you could have died hearing the low moans Leonard was placing in your ear. You hummed as your eyes drifted shut, and you could feel the coil that had been tightening was ready to snap. 
“I want to spend the rest of my life with you (Y/N),” He thrust to punctuate every word and there you went. You gasped and drug your nails down his back as your thighs tightened around his waist. Leonard released his grip from around your neck and pulled away from you, spilling all over your stomach. He was gone the next second, before returning with a warm wash rag, practically wiping you down from head to toe. You couldn’t help yourself when you settled down under the sheets, face buried in the pillows that smelt like him.
Leonard soon returned, climbing into the bed beside you and pulling you into his chest. Kissing the top of your head before speaking, “Are you okay? I know that got intense pretty fast,” His fingers were absentmindedly running through your hair.
You yawned, moving yourself closer so your ear was pressed up against his chest, his heartbeat thrumming in your ears. You nodded against his ribcage, “I’m fine. I’m great actually…and the ‘Doctor Thing’ is kinda hot.” You could feel his chest shake with a silent laugh and you yawned again.  Pulling the blanket up to your neck and quickly falling into the best sleep you had received in weeks.
****************************
Leonard instinctively grabbed for you when he rolled over half awake in bed. He received no reprieve from the empty sheets, they were still slightly warm, and now he was wide awake. Scanning the room with his eyes, he couldn’t see you anywhere. There was something new on the dresser and he slowly made his way over to it. It was a note from you, and he couldn’t help but notice how elegant your handwriting was as it scrawled across the page. ‘I needed coffee, and you have none. Come find me if you would like a cup.” 
Leonard almost seemed like he was on autopilot as he dressed and brushed his teeth, leaving his quarters with only his comm and a mission to see you again. He quickly arrived in front of your door, and knocked within the same breath, realizing how desperate he was to see you. Now you stood in front of him, in a white t-shirt. He swallowed thickly as he could see your nipples pressed against the fabric, noticing how the pajama pants you stole from him hung around your waist.
He noticed the way you were looking at him, eyes still slightly coated with tiredness as they scanned his face, he tried to remain as untroubled as possible, trying not to give any signs of doubt as he stared back at you. He had something important he needed to tell you. You slowly reached out and grabbed his hand, pulling him back into your quarters with you. Leonard could smell the freshly ground coffee and finally took a glance around now that he was here again. Taking in more than just the photos on your walls. 
He watched as you made your way across the room from him, back toward the espresso machine that sat on your counter, “Now how did you manage to pull that off?”
You looked over your shoulder as you giggled, “Listen, when it comes to Starfleet, I’m not dumb. I know that I’m a nepo baby and I know that I could have everything the easy way. I could take advantage of everything and everyone would let me. James could too.” Leonard scoffed as you started swirling and lightly tapping your steamed milk, “I know that my last name carries a legacy that I won’t ever feel I have earned.” You started slowly pouring the milk into a steel Starfleet mug, “However, almost everyone else thinks that just carrying her name is enough to give me the world. Spock knew that, he challenged me all throughout my time in Starfleet, and yes the age gap was definitely weird for everyone at first, but he sees something in me, something I never will.” You looked up at him as you started tamping your espresso, “Admiral Pike knew that. It’s because he knows me. I’ve called that man Uncle Chris since I could talk. He knew a pay bump wasn’t going to get me to leave my station. Especially to come to the ship he was the first captain of. So he gave me Spock, and a brand new espresso machine.” 
Your fingers tapped on the edge of the counter as you bit your bottom lip. You grabbed your finished espresso shot, holding it up to the light and inspecting it. “I was a barista once, and I loved it, it gave me something that made me feel like me. The other people in the coffee shop didn’t know who I was, or if they did they didn’t care.” You were practically speaking into the counter as you delicately poured the shot over your milk. “My mom would have loved it. If there’s one thing my dad drilled into my head, it’s that I didn’t have to choose Starfleet.” You now held a bottle filled with a purple syrup. You steadied your hand as you etched a simple crosshatch pattern into the top of the foam.
“I’ve been thinking about what you said in med bay for a couple days now,” You quickly sanitized everything, exchanging steaming pitchers, mugs, and even the shot glass, “My mom, is the reason I do anything in this life.” He watched as you started your process over again. Moving at a slightly quicker pace this time, “She died when I saw 5. It’s been 20 years and yet her birthday still feels like my day of atonement.” Leonard noticed how you adjusted the amount of coffee in the puck and the amount of water, “My last relationship ended because he proposed, and then I found out he had a wife.” You couldn’t help but happily gasp as you finally watched the shots finish pulling. 
“Just because you were married the person you, at one point in time, loved,” You were now steadily pouring the milk into the espresso that laid in the bottom on the mug, the stream of milk coming from your steaming pitcher couldn’t have been thicker than a pencil, “It doesn’t mean that you’re broken, and if you are, then so am I. And so is James. And Spock as well. Every single person on this ship,” You handed him the mug, “Is broken in some way, and it doesn’t make them any less worthy of love.” 
You cradled your mug in your hands before sitting across from him, in a small armchair you managed to tastefully squeeze in the small living room provided to you, “I love Spock, and I love James,” you swiftly pulled your legs underneath you, “And I love you, Leonard. And you are worthy of love.”
You slowly took a sip from your mug, watching his reaction as you tried to keep a somewhat safe distance from him, it wasn’t every day you could pull that conversation out of thin air. You became somewhat concerned as Leonard stared at his coffee, after a couple more seconds he looked at you and you felt like you could breathe again.
“Do you remember the first time you ever came to med bay? The conversation we had?”
************************
Leonard couldn’t help but stare at the perfect white dot as it floated perfectly in the middle of the carmel colored drink from the milk and espresso mixing together. He felt breathless. You remembered, this was the first time he had coffee made by you since he tried to run away. He swore he could feel his heart swell, looking at the act of love made right in front of his face. “And I love you, Leonard. And you are worthy of love.” He wanted to run. To move out of your eyesight, and if he could, out of your life.
He couldn’t. He wouldn’t dare. You were here, why would he ever leave? He took in everything around him, trying to stifle his nervous system that was telling him to abort mission. He swore he could see flashing red lights in his vision. He finally looked at you and the room was alive and it was all because of you, you were the sunshine he so desperately craved. Like his own personal star.  “Do you remember the first time you ever came to med bay? The conversation we had?”
“I remember the big three,” you softly smiled at him, and he watched as you took another sip from your mug.
Leonard just needed a little bit more context, for his own peace, to make sure the both of you were on the same page, “The big three?”
 “We talked about how flat whites are your preferred drink of choice, we talked about ‘the deal’ with me and Spock, and we talked about how you didn’t believe in soulmates.” It almost seemed like you had a checklist to remember. Feeling quite pleased with himself that you seemed to be on the same page already. 
“I never believed in having a soulmate. Not just for me, but for everyone. I’ve always thought it was crazy to love someone based on a mark we’ve had since we were born.” Leonard finally took his first drink, appreciating the warm, velvety milk that soothed his groggy morning throat, “The idea that you can’t love someone just because you weren’t chosen for them was always ridiculous to me. I’ve always wanted to reject the idea that someone should love me just because of a damn sign from the universe I had no say in.”
His gaze seemed more intense now, hoping you would know the gravity of the words he was trying to muster the courage to say. He was in this for the long haul, for the rest of his life. “The night I came to check on you I saw it. In the photo of you and Jim.”
You smiled at him and Leonard took a shaky breath, “Your mark is the dendrites of a multipolar neuron,” He watched your face morph as you brought your wrist to your face, gently tracing the lines with your fingers. Leonard pulled his arm out of the black thermal he was wearing, and for the first time, he turned his arm, and just below the crease of his elbow, was the finishing piece of yours, “I got the terminals of the neuron,”
“They look like plant roots,” You mused from your spot on the chair, now leaning over the arm of the chair to get a closer look, “Everything clicked that night,” Leonard stood, moving in front of you and bringing your wrist to the inside of his elbow, watching as your bodies and the image connected, “I ran away that night because I was scared. The thought of you being mine was almost too much to handle, then I saw the way you looked at me. No one had ever looked at me like that.” He was now holding your hand, watching as a slight blush consumed your cheeks. “You still look at me like that. I love you (Y/N), and the only thing I ever want is to be yours.”
**************************************
You wanted to cry, you had been naked in front of Leonard before but now you felt like you had been stripped bare, you needed a break in this conversation. You could feel the heaviness in the air, making it hard to breathe. “People will say things about you Leonard. It’s happened before.” 
“What? They’ll think I’m with you for the status?” Leonard puffed his chest playfully.
“No, that’s not what I’m worried about.” You straightened yourself up, now on your knees as you locked eye contact with Leonard, “You’re the CMO of the USS Enterprise, you don’t need my status. No, what I’m worried about is that you’re one of the youngest men I’ve dated, and that’s still a 9 year age difference.”
“Youngest? I told Jim they’d never let me speak at the Academy again.”
You couldn’t help but laugh, pulling him in by the front of his shirt, “I’ll have you know I am a grown adult Dr. McCoy. With a fully formed prefrontal cortex. I think I’m perfectly capable of making my own decisions.” You were hovering in front of his lips when you saw a small smile make an appearance, a knock at the door pulled two two of you out of your reverie and you groaned. Pulling away from him and grumbling under your breath all the way to your door.
James was waiting, bouncing in place as he tried seeing into your room from his angle in the hallway. “Did Leonard give you his gift?” James bounced his eyebrows up and down at you. 
“If you’re talking about the potentially giant venus fly trap then, yes.” You crossed your arms over your chest.
“So, it’s giant huh?” A smirk cracking his face as he watched yours morph.
“I mean…” you paused, not knowing if Leonard wanted to tell people, before shrugging your shoulders as you fully faced James, measuring the air with your pointer fingers.
“Are you serious? Tell me you’re joking?” You slightly jumped as Leonard placed his hand on your shoulder. 
“What are we joking about?” He yawned after he spoke and you knew it couldn’t have been any earlier than 0700. 
“James doesn’t believe you have a big dick.” You laughed as Leonard suddenly stood straighter and seemed to tense up, you turned toward him, pulling him down for a gentle kiss, “James didn’t believe that we actually told each other how we felt.”
“Thank god you did because my next plan was to strand the two of you in a desert at night.” 
“Goodbye James,” you briefly waved before closing the door and pulling Leonard into your bedroom.
236 notes · View notes
bandgie · 2 years ago
Text
Beast of a Man
Smut!Tarzan
Synopsis: You were on an expedition with a team to investigate ape behavior. After setting off a booby-trap accidentally, it's not your team that finds you, but an ape-like man. Is he the missing link anthropologists have been looking for? You need to take him back to camp, and you're thinking of luring him in by more than one way.
A/N: I dont give a fuck if this movie is older than me this man is HOT no one talks about him and im SICK of it.
3.9k words
Tumblr media
You take a deep breath through your nose and exhale through your mouth. You were growing irritated. You were somewhere in West Africa sweating your balls off (if you had any) trying to follow where the shrewdness of apes went. They had a tendency to relocate to avoid predators, and they happened to the night you slept in.
You didn't bother asking your team to help you look. You all have been up doing your notes for your dissertation and you decided that they deserved some shut eye. You were tempted to ask the person who was guiding you through the jungles, but the language barrier made you decide not to. Too much work, but the apes couldn't have gone far right?
Since it was blazing, you decided to wear some white shorts and a tan button up shirt completed with a safari hat on top. You made sure your bag was packed with snacks and water before leaving. Of course, you also brought your hunting knife. You prayed it wouldn't be necessary to use, but being out in the open made you a prey to all sorts of things.
You started your journey, keeping close to the trail you were familiar with. You started East since that's where the sun rises, praying that they would be there. You weren't sure how long you walking for until you finally found a piece of ape hair. You gasp excitedly and bent down to grab it, you were getting close.
You wiped the sweat from your forearms and continued forward with new resolution. You were going to find the nest and since it's still early afternoon, you might even be able to see-
"Ahh!" you screamed. Something tightened around your foot and you went up in the air upside, hitting your head on the ground in the process. A pained groan left your lips as you opened your eyes. You were hanging upside down by one of your ankles.
"Aw shit..." you cursed, looking up to see your foot tangled in...vine? Your eyebrows furrowed, wouldn't it have been better to use rope? Maybe your team put this here as a trap, or maybe it was the locals to catch some animals. You felt stupid as you reached upwards to grab your foot and get yourself loose.
Which was much harder than you initially thought. It was too far for you too reach and when you did manage to grasp your ankle, pain would surge from your lower back to your neck as you continued to awkwardly bend your body. Your head was pounding, blood drumming your ears before you finally gave up. They'll find you, you just have to be patient.
"HELP!" You yelled, voice echoing in the trees. You started calling your team by names, then last names. You felt your eyes water in frustration, thinking about how stupid you were to travel alone.
Granted you couldn't be that far from the trail, maybe 6 miles. But you don't know how much longer you could stand being upside down. Then it hit you, your knife! A sound of relief escaped you as your reached behind your back to grab your knife. Only your bag wasn't there. It must've flown off when you were thrusted into the air because it was 20 feet away from you on the ground.
Now you were going to really cry. No, that won't help, you think, I just need to keep yelling, but should you? Here you are alone in the jungle, making all these noises. What if you attract a predator. The thought makes you stop.
You take deep breaths as a way to keep your cool. You'll be fine, they'll find you, you just need to wa- a crunch distracts your thoughts. Your eyes try to find from where the sound came from, turning your head frantically around.
"Hello?" You call, gentle. You're not sure if it's your people, but from the lack of response you doubt it is. The crunching gets faster and louder, you hold your breath in and prepare for an animals to jump our and devour you.
Instead, a man emerges from bushes, a naked man. Almost naked, save for the piece of cloth that wraps around his waist. You narrow your eyes, unable to comprehend what you're seeing. He doesn't look like he natives that live here. The main thing to give it away is the way he walks, or more like knuckle-walking. He scoots closer to your, eyes intensely staring at you. He quadrupedaly walks to you, and you scream.
He wildly moves back, hooting as a response. You thrash around, fear bubbling in your stomach. "No! Fuck off! Go away!"
He knuckle-walks around you, inspecting to see if you're an actual threat. You're not of course, you're tied and on the verge of fainting from being upside for so long. It doesn't take long for the ape-man to realize it and come within 3 inches of your face. You stop moving and stare into his eyes. He's actually... beautiful. Looking past the dirt on his body and his tangled hair, he had a strong jaw and a large nose with a bump at the bridge. He had high cheekbones, thick eyebrows, and deep eyes. Not to mention he was staring at you in the same way, only 100x more intense. He was looking at you like you're the only woman he's ever seen, maybe the only person he's ever seen period.
His hand reaches to touch your face, his fingers gently play with your features. Starting with the nose, eyes, eyelashes, ears, then your lips. He touches his own afterwards as if comparing them. He grunts to himself as if he's talking outloud.
His hands get more explosive, moving to your neck. His hands keep traveling until they feel your breasts, he stops. He feels his own chest and a look of confusion crosses his face. When he goes back to feel your body, you thrash.
"No!"
Your stern voice makes him take a step back, but he knows you're not a real threat. He moves back to his original place and touches your top, playing with the buttons. Sweat starts to drips off your neck to the ground, you don't know how much longer you can stand this position.
His hands discover that you can unbutton these little circles, and that's exactly was he does. He doesn't even notice the bra that holds your tits, his focus completely on the shirt. When he does, his hands take no shame in touching some more.
His touch is so gentle that you instinctively puff your chest closer to him. His fingertips travel from one breast to the other, not knowing your bra can also come off.
Wait, why are you thinking about him taking off your bra? You don't know this man, if he even is a man. But the way he touches you is addicting. You love the softness of it, how he touches you as if you're the most fragile thing on this Earth.
You gently use your hands to grasp his, he jumps at the contact and look back at your eyes. You guide him to the inside of your bra, having your tits spill out. His eyes widen is surprise, as if he's never seen such a complicated contraption. He looks at his chest quickly and back at yours. He starts grabbing them and kneading them, enjoying the softness you have.
He grunts in what seems like approval. He sees you nipples harden from his touches and he pinches them. You moan in response, though you think you're just groaning from pain. You're going to blame your behavior on the lack of blood supply in your brain, but right now the dampness in your underwear is more important.
You use your hands to take off the rest of your shirt and bra, completely topless to him. This man was so entranced by your body that you have to use your hands to make him look at your face. You point to the vine that has you hostage.
"Help me down, and I'll help you," you don't even know if he can understand you, but he must because he climbs a nearby tree and loosens the knot. You fall with a thud and groan, finally feeling the extra blood leave your head.
The man climbs on top of you and looks into your eyes as if he's asking something. You nod, already knowing what he wants. You guide the back of his head back to your tits and he gratefully pops a nipple in his mouth. His hands are on either side of you, possessively keeping you under him. Your hands tangle in his hair and he continues to suck.
You hum and squeeze your legs together, wetness gathering between your legs. He releases your boob with the small pop! and goes to the other side, letting his tongue roll over your nipple. You use your hand to grab his, placing it on your other boob. He gets the message and starts massaging your boob while keeping the other in his mouth.
You moan and grind your body against his, trying to get some friction. The need in your pussy is almost unbearable, you want it to to touched, paid attention to, but you hold back. You don't want to make a decision you would regret, but you're not sure if anything you're doing is helping with that.
He suddenly stops, a whine leaving your lips when he does. He closes his eyes and inhales, looking all over your body. His smells different parts of your body, shoving his nose between your breasts.
"What?" You ask, suddenly self-conscious. The beast of a man travels down you stomach, down your navel, occasionally sticking his tongue out to taste you. Then he stops at your shorts, eyes looking into yours.
He puts his attention back onto your clothes, attempting to take them off himself. He sees the familiar button on the top of your shorts and decides he should start there. You're amazed at his intelligence. He may not be verbal, but he has amazing innovative and cognitive ability.
Your thoughts are pulled away as he manages to do the same to your shorts. He tugs them all the way down to you ankles and stares at the spot he's been aching to devour. You know you must not have the best taste considering how much you were sweating but 30 minutes prior, but this man couldn't care less. He leaned down to your core and took a deep breath, groaning as he did. His hands gripped your thighs and he squeezed them. You whimpered at his touch, opening your legs to give him better access to your pussy.
You were soaking, you could feel you essence dripping down to your body and the way you're underwear felt cold against the wind. The ape-man went it, licking your wetness and widening your legs even more. He bent your legs forwards, folding your back so you knees were almost touching your face.
You squealed at the movement never being in this position. It was pretty uncomfortable, but the way his hands held your legs by your under thighs made your stomach coil in anticipation. He used his tongue more than anything, not knowing that he could so much more.
He used his muscle to collect the remaining drool your pussy produced, trying to find the source. He was beginning to get irritated, but little did he know that your underwear was covering his desire. A part of you loved watching him struggle, but the need for him directly on you was stronger. You reached your arms around your hips and moved your underwear to the side, using your thumb to rub yourself in circles.
You tapped your pussy, making sure it made wet noises to get his attention. "Here, do it here."
The man stopped for a second, bewitched by the sight of your dripping folds and pulsing pussy. He had never seen anything like it, like a rare cuisine he was lucky enough to stumble upon. He experimentally stuck his tongue out to taste you. You hummed in satisfaction and used your fingers to spread yourself. He let your taste settle on his tastebuds, licking his lips hungrily as he decided that this was the best meal he was ever going to have.
He pushed your legs further back and buried his face into you. You moaned as his tongue shot out all over your pussy, smearing both of you juices all around. The ape man moved his face up and down against you, his large nose occasionally touching the bud of your clit.
You squirmed when he did and he noticed your behavior. He moved his tongue up to flick your bundle of nerves and you jolted. An intrigued smile found his lips as he continued his movements. It was too much, you were too sensitive and you instinctively yanked on his hair to pull him away.
You moaned in relief, but the man above you was anything but. He grabbed your hands held them down to your sides, using his chest and face to keep you in your bent position. As if to show you that he wasn't happy with your action, he ate you out brutally. He used his teeth to gently scape against your clitoris, a move he shortly found out gave him the best response.
"No no it's too much! Stop im sorry im sorry!" You cry. You pleas fell on deaf ears. He sucked hard on your bud, stretching it as he pulled away. A loud cry left out lips and he finally stopped to look at you. Your legs were shaking, sweat all over your body, back aching, and tears falling.
He gently let your legs fall so you were flat on the ground. A small sob and thank you left you as your legs closed together. The man closely looked at your face and licked your tears away, an apology. His hands soothingly went through your hair with a look of slight worry on his face.
He had such an intense gaze, you thought he would kiss you if he knew how. You sat up and put your hands on his chest, having him lay on the ground this time. Your eyes found the tent that formed in his patch of cloth. You smiled and had your hands explore his chest. He eyes you warily, not used to being under anyone or anything.
A devious smile played on your lips as you leaned down and kissed his ear, "My turn."
You sat back up and scooted down so you could place yourself between his legs, eagerly lifting off his little wrap so you could see his glory. Your eyes widened at his cock. He was so thick, veins wrapping around his length. The tip was a pretty pink, a sharp contrast to his tanned dick. You felt you mouth salivate at him and you leaned down to place a kiss on his tip.
He groaned, thrusting his hips up to feel you more. You playfully tsked and shook your head, "So impatient."
You got on all fours to be face-to-face with him, hands playing his thighs. You kissed over his pelvis, his bush, his inner thighs, anywhere besides the one place where he wanted you most. His hands went outwards besides him to grasp onto the ground beneath him. You could tell from the way he was straining and groaning, he was holding back from grasping your head. You blushed at his consideration, he's kind of a gentleman.
You decide to thank him by finally taking him into your mouth, making sure your tongue covers his slit and slowly bobbing your head up and down. He thanks you by whining, a sound that's going to forever imprint in your brain. You use one hand to keep on his stomach and the other to wrap around his shaft. You worked in one fluid motion, tasting his salty pre-cum and feeling you spit dribble out of your mouth onto your hand.
You really wanted to test your limits to see how far you could take him, but know with his girth that would be difficult. You still decided to try anyway, moving your hand to play with his balls and pulling your mouth out. He huffed in protest and looked up at you, eyes hazy.
You made sure to gather enough spit and drool over his cock. You relaxed your jaw and went back in. You took a deep breath through your nose and keep sliding down. You gagged when his tip hit you throat, but he still more than halfway to go. You closed your eyes and willed your head forward, mouth opening almost painfully.
Your pussy throbbed in excitement, imagining that it was getting stretched out instead of your mouth. The man beneath you broke, hands grasping the sides of your head and shoving you down. You violently gagged around him, eyes pooling with tears. Your nose tickled his bushy pelvis. You looked up at him to plead to let you go, but seeing your begging eyes and cock covered mouth did the opposite to him. He used your mouth as a cock sleeve, harshly dragging your lips up and down his length.
Your hands gripped his thighs, he was going so hard and fast you started thinking you were going to throw up. You eyes rolled to the back of your head you felt your pussy drip down your thighs. You've never been used by this, and you never wanted it to stop. You could probably just cum from giving him head, but your need for air was starting to get the better of you.
It took both of your hands to rip away one of his before you finally popped your mouth off his dick, gasping and coughing for air. The ape-man sat up, finally recognizing that you were on the verge of passing out. He brushed the air out your face and cradled your face into his hands. He watched as you steadied your breath, holding you close to him.
Never had a man treated you with such care and such disregard at the same time, it went straight to your aching core. You adjusted so you were straddling his lap, hands gripping his shoulders. He wasn't sure what you were doing, but when he felt your folds grind against his cock he knew what you wanted.
You grabbed the base of cock, moved your underwear to the side, and smeared hit tip over your clit. Both of you hummed in unison, his grip tightening on your hips. You moved your legs so you were in a squatting position, preparing yourself to take him in.
He patiently waited as you dipped the tip of dick cock into your pussy, shivers enveloping your body. His face twisted in unfamiliar pleasure, teeth gritting. You put more of your weight on him, sinking more and more onto his cock before you finally felt him fully in your gut. Your eyes rolled back placed your head in the crook of his neck breathless. Once you adjusted, you softly bounced on him, feeling his teeth and tongue get a feel of you exposed neck and ear. He growled approvingly once you started moving more aggressively.
One of his large hands went into your scalp, yanking your hair back to bare your throat at him. A part of you grew scared, but the way he was drooling out of the corner of his lip made you bounce with more determination. He bit the base of your throat making you cry out, then licked it apologetically. He didn't know that his nips at your neck distracted you, so when you slowed your movements down he grew upset. Taking matter into his own hands, he grabbed your ass and slammed you down hard.
You yelped, picking your head up as you looked into his eyes. He has a certain glaze over his eyes, as if he wasn't really looking at you. You leaned back to show a better view of where your bodies connected, his eyes immediately went there.
This must've been some encouragement for him because he started thrusting upwards too. The pleasure was too much, twisting your gut and providing a fiery sensation in your stomach. You whimpered and wrapped your arms around his neck for better support. You let him abuse your pussy, not caring about how he ripped your underwear off to properly see himself pound into you.
"Fuuuuuck," you moaned, "you feel so good." He had no reaction to your words, but you didn't care. He was going to bruise your hips form how hard he was holding you, but you were so close to finishing that none of that mattered.
You used one of your hands to rub your clit, attempting to finish faster. Your whines got louder and more frequent, he did the same. You tried not being loud, but you almost screamed when you came. He felt the way your walls squeezed around him and how your juices flowed out. He watched as your body nearly went limp, putting all your weight against him.
He took his opportunity to slam his cock all the way down into you until you could feel him kiss your cervix. You don't know if the noises you were making could count as moaning, but he frankly couldn't give less of a shit.
Finally, you felt the sweet warmth of his orgasm filling you up. You squeezed around him again and he moaned, wrapping his arms around your torso to make sure you didn't move from him. He couldn't stop leaking inside you as you felt some of it dribble out and possible drip down his balls.
You could tell he didn't want to pull out, satisfied with letting his cock soften between your legs. The thought to let it happen was tempting, but you already let a strange man fuck and cum inside you. There had to be some morals left.
You lifted your head up from his neck and pushed away from him. He huffed in defiance, content with his current position. You untangled yourself form him and wobbled upwards, standing. He slowly got up and looked around as if he was looking for something. Then he crawled over to your torn underwear, grabbing and putting it up to his face. You laughed as he took a deep breath, inhaling your scent like he couldn't get enough.
Once you had your top on, you walked over to him and stuck your hand out for him to give it back. Rather than obeying he growled, not threateningly, but rather in resistance. You sighed and decided going comando would be your only option.
Then an idea popped into you mind. It would be such a waste to leave a man here who seemed to listen to almost your every word. Who you could mold into the perfect fuck. Plus, you needed to study apes anyway and he seemed like the perfect willing participant.
You squatted down to his level and gently ran your fingers through his long, tangled hair. He closed his eyes and leaned into your touch. Oh yeah, you think, a perfect candidate.
You gently tapped the underwear in his hands and his eyes shot back open into yours. "Ya know," you started, "I have more of those back at camp. Wanna see?"
a/n: part 2 here
2K notes · View notes
kaurwreck · 10 months ago
Note
do you have a favorite literary ref in bsd or is that a cruel question to ask
This is so hard! I like lots and lots of them, for different reasons. If I had to choose only one, and if I were to be sincere, Gin might be my favorite literary reference. I really love how much her namesake short story reframes Akutagawa's character, especially when comparing his Beast iteration against the version of him in bsd's main timeline. O-Gin also just really neatly and cleanly encapsulates what I love about Akutagawa's Kirishitan mono, including his affection for the Holy Fool trope.
To be more silly, I really love when Atsushi tell Tanzō Tonan that he has to feed his chameleon to escape the conversation with Tonan upon realizing Tonan wasn't being forthright (just ahead of the Decay of Angels framing the Agency). There are two references here that I adore (1) the reference to Chamelon Diary, in which Nakajima Atsushi semi-autobiographically recounts receiving a chameleon from a student and also his epiphany on how to live absent objective existential meaning; and (2) the reference to Tonan-sensei, a short story by Nakajima Atsushi about his beloved uncle, whom I also adore.
Rather than attempt to write an essay on Tonan-sensei and his influence on Nakajima Atsushi, I'll simply include a roughly translated version of the short story's Wikipedia synopsis:
The story depicts the protagonist, who secretly harbors self-loathing resentment towards his uncle because he shares similar mental characteristics with himself, but through his interactions with his uncle as he faces death, he gradually sorts out his critical view of the coexistence of love and hate and comes to realize the deep love he has for his uncle that lies dormant within him.
I will also include below a snippet about Tonan (referred to also as "Tan") from Nakajima Atsushi: His Life and Work, a dissertation submitted to the University of Hawaii by Nobuko Miyama Ochner in May 1984 (the date is relevant, because Ochner-sensei was able to speak to some of Atsushi's then-living family and friends to piece together his biography):
[Nakajima Atsushi's grandfather's] second eldest son, Tan, was also a scholar of Chinese. A bright boy, he was able to read the Chinese classics at the age of six and compose poetry and prose in Chinese at thirteen, according to the Japanese system of reckoning age. He was a proud, uncompromising, and impatient man, who never married, and who seemed to be always pursuing the impossible. In a short piece entitled "Tonan Sensei" (Tonan was Tan's pen name), Atsushi describes his uncle as having the virgin's beautifully clear, pure eyes— "the eyes of a man who is always dreaming an impossible dream." Tan, who revered General Nogi Maresuke (1849-1912), was an "amalgam of fervent patriotism and the temperament of a traditional Confucian scholar." He was greatly concerned about the future of Japan and China, as well as of Asia in general, confronted with the onslaught of the Western colonial powers.
...
In his articles he laments the ignorance of Chinese culture and tradition on the part of the Japanese diplomats in China, and criticizes their excessive reliance upon Western sources of news information. He felt that the peoples of Japan and China must unite in their efforts to repel the outsiders from East Asia; he went to China at least two times to try to enlist Chinese support for his vision. One of the prominent men he met was the scholar Lo Chen-yii (1866-1940), who later wrote an introduction to the posthumously published collection of Tan's poetry and prose, Tonan sonko. Atsushi is said to resemble this uncle most.
11 notes · View notes