#do her cookies give immortality?

[thegreateggbandit]

… what

… WHAT

World War I?!?! NANCY HOW OLD ARE YOU?!?!!?

[qdbs-writes]

How do you think the Cullens would act around a disinterested crush? Maybe they're fated but reader isn't having it lol

(I love your twilight writing btw thank God someone is still doing it 🤤🤤)

ah it has been many moons since I've gotten a twilight request yay!

Cullen Clan Reacting To Their Crush Being Disinterested In Them

Carlisle Cullen

Being alive for just over 400 years tends to give one a good perspective on life and the bigger picture, and Carlisle sure has a pretty good idea of how all things pan out. So you're not interested in him? That's fine, Carlisle can wait for as long as you need to change your mind.

In the meantime, Carlisle will continue to maintain your friendship and continue to show just how hard he's worked to become the kind caring father figure he is. He knows you'll fall for him, eventually.

Esme Cullen

Obviously, she's not going to stop caring about you just because you don't return her feelings. But she might switch up how she shows her affection.

Rather than flirty winks and suspiciously candle-lit wine tastings, she'll back up to more traditionally motherly affections. Making sure you're eating right, baking cookies, etc. And of course, giving you homemade soup when you're sick is still one of her favourite things to do, no need to stop now.

Edward Cullen

Of course, you're not interested, how could anyone love a monster like him? Who did he think he was, thinking he was worthy of your love? Or so his inner monologue goes.

But it's really not that dramatic, it almost never is, Edward just sprung his crush on you suddenly and it caught you off guard. It was largely the excessively long preamble about how he was an irredeemable murderer that put you off first, but of course, he won't realise that until considerably later.

Rosalie Hale

She's a little relieved actually. All her mortal and immortal life, Rosalie has been aggressively pursued by people she wasn't particularly interested in, so the fact that she can crush on someone who isn't really that interested is a wonderful change of pace.

For the first time ever, Rosalie has butterflies in her stomach, she fumbles with her words when she speaks to you, and she feels like a silly, mortal teenage girl again, begging her mother to let her go to the dance just so she can sneak away to catch a glimpse of someone just like you.

Emmett Cullen

You and Emmett had been good friends for a while so when he casually drops a blissful "We should get married" into the conversation, you initially choke on your drink in laughter.

Emmett's a little heartbroken that you'd laugh at something like that, considering that he was being 100% serious. But since you've known him, the both of you have been constantly cracking up jokes, trying to get on each other's nerves, so no wonder you thought this was another one of his pranks. He decides to take this reaction as a blessing, you have no idea he's actually into you, now he knows he has to work out a different way to confess his feelings for you.

Alice Cullen

She's a little confused obviously, having multiple visions of the two of you in a romantic relationship kind of gave her the impression that it might've been going to come true, but your disinterest says something else altogether.

But the worst part is that those damn visions of you and her together keep coming back, taunting her, luring her in deeper to despair with the thoughts of what might be. It's all getting so intense, so she decides to skip town for a bit, see if that changes anything, or at least helps her clear her head.

Jasper Hale

Oh well, so you're not interested in a romantic relationship, so what? Doesn't mean you can't still be friends. Doesn't mean he can't be the charming Southern gentleman he is. Doesn't mean he can't still pull out chairs or open doors for you. Or send anonymous bouquets to your house. Or leave your favourite snacks in your locker when you're having a rough day. Of course not.

It doesn't mean he can't worry about other people who might want to date you. Doesn't mean he can't scare off people who'd be bad for you. I mean, what else are friends for?

[thegnomelord]

Shark Merperson reader is real gud.

- 🦈

(HOLY FUCK. THANK YOU TO WHICH EVER ANON REQUESTED THAT BECAUSE I FUCKIN LOVE SHARKS.

Now Im thinking of a Price x Reader, because shars are the oldest species known to exist. Obviously sharks arent immortal, they've just been on this earth way b4 tress bloody existed.

So Im thinking the readers an eldritch creature, they represent sharks as a whole, as long sharks exsist they exsist. Heck they mights of even of been Prices mentor when he was in his draconic 100s? (Late 20s?).

Imagine Price missing his friend calls him up to see hows hes doing. Reader elated to meet an old friend, accepts the invitation to meets up with him. Reader definitely scolds him for lossing a wing, honestly is pertrified Price lost a piece of himself and thought he was retiring due to it. Cut ahort to him smacking him slap dab on the head when he learns he's lost it a long time ago and didnt tell him.

Cue wholesome interactions th 141 and etc. Heck maybe some romance with Price.

Just a blurb i had yo tell you abt)

Okay, this tickles my eldrich abomination trying to act human itch

CW:SFW, eldritch reader, kissing

Price knows you're there the second he steps onto the old wooden pier, able to smell seaweed and brine and something in the air — what he thinks the bottom of the ocean smells like, old rot of decaying whales and older heat of geothermal vents — the soft wind billowing his hair like the breathing of an elderly beast.

He knows you're watching him, passively at least, washed up mermaid purses dotting the beach to give you a glimpse of the world above the waves through the yolks vital for the pup's survival, able to dream of the warm sun and course sand while you slumber beneath the waves.

"Oi, ser, yer look like a wee lass waiting for her sailor." Soap's sharp voice cuts through the air, the werewolf far too energized for his own good, the sand in his fur not dampening his mood when he can just shake himself off and flick the grains on Simon.

"Hah," Price snorts, "Maybe I am." He tilts his head back to the sea, sharp eyes watching the breaking waves. "Time to wake up old friend." He mutters your mangled name under his breath, mortal lips and vocal cords unable to replicate your own voice.

The young ones in his team lack the sight needed to notice your form slowly rise from the sea like a submarine breaking through the ice, only the visible flicker of air and the receding water keying them in. Price old enough to see you without needing the inner surface of his skull to be dotted with eyes. Though even he sees your real form like a man having a stroke — vaguely familiar at first yet the details are undefinable — flesh and sea melding together without rhyme or reason, long strings of seaweed bearing miniature eyes with pups wriggling inside, cookie cutter sharks boring holes through finless corpses so long eel sharks may form ever reforming sinews, fossilized bone and old rock giving giving support to the massive insult to reality's laws; birth and life wrapped up in death.

You're an affront to logic. And with one sneeze from existence itself you're human standing in front of him.

Eerily human.

Perfectly human.

Almost.

"What the fuck?" He can faintly hear Gaz's voice, all of them only now noticing you stand where you weren't previously.

Your hand touches his back before he even registers you move, always slightly damp, "When did this happen?" You ask as you trace the spot where his wing used to be. "What did this?"

"And a 'hello' to you too sweetheart." He clasps a hand around your waist, purring softly in greeting as he pulls you closer to his chest. Even if he sees you once every few centuries, even if you don't possess the ability to reciprocate, his love for you is as youthful as it was when he was but a wyrm.

Your facial features remain neutral like the ones of sunken statues, but you blink, and for a few seconds he can see that yawning abyss in your eyes. "Hi." You say, your hand still tracing the bump created by atrophied flight muscles, trying to judge how fresh it is. "Explain."

Your tone sounds like a predator baring it's teeth, but he knows you wouldn't harm him. "In a lil' bit." He snorts, puts pressure on your back until he forces your legs to move. "Come, want you to meet my boys."

The introductions are odd on both ends considering you hadn't spoken with people other than Price since that Icarus of a passenger ship mistook your fin for an iceberg and they've never met an old one like you. But you like them, they compliment Price just like the small scale he gave you makes the pearls and gold offered to you through the ages shine more.

Even if your face is unreadable, somehow they can figure out you're not too amused when you hear he'd lost his wing during a mission. "I told you arrogance would cost you." You at least you can mimic a sigh as you rub your head, "At least you retired." You say,

"We wish!" Soap snorts before he can help it, and the next thing they hear is a horrific crack that has them jumping out of their skin.

Your head had whipped 180 degrees with the rest of your body remained in place, the laws of nature nothing more but blurry guidelines. "You. . .did retire?" You ask, voice like the roar of a whirlpool.

"About that," Price starts, unable to finish his thought as you slap him upside the head as if he's still the whelp who thought he could brave an ocean storm.

"You'll put me in the grave." You growl, holding him by the ear, words spilling from your mouth like seawater filling the empty bowels of a ship. "I swear your scaly hide hasn't learned a single thing-"

"Should we help?" Gaz wonders as they watch you chastise their captain like he's a boy.

"No, this is great entertainment." Ghost chuckles.

"Want me ta grab the popcorn?" Johnny ads, already snacking, tail thumping against Simon's leg and growling playfully when Gaz reaches for the snacks.

Eventually your anger relents, mood changing as swiftly as the tide. You spend the time they have left learning about the men he's chosen as his hoard. Kyle's a bit weary of you just due to his harpy nature, but soon enough you two can be found sitting on the pier and fishing, and if you purposely make the waves flow so a big fish snags on Kyle's line, Price never says anything about it, not when his boy has a smile as big as the sun when he looks at the gigantic fish flopping on his hook.

You attempting to help Soap cook the barbeque, but you're fine motor skills are rusty after all these years of slumber, so the food is slightly burnt but Price loves when his food's basically charcoal and eats it with a smile, especially as it keeps you from telling all the embarrassing stories you have of him, from when he got his ass bit by a squid to when he was so horny he ended up rutting against an extra curvy piece of rock, though the rest have already heard enough dirt to bury him for the next several decades.

Unfortunately for Price, you and Ghost hit it off like a house on fire, and Ghost ends up learning far too many ways to hurt people without killing them that most definitely are against the Geneva conventions but you pull seniority on it. Simon in turn, teaches you how to play cards, which, when you're literally a god that can see almost everything including your opponent's cards, means the shmucks Simon ropes into playing you and Simon end up with empty pockets.

As the sun stars to dip behind the horizon you wind up sitting next to Price by the fire, the others splashing in the water.

You feel his wing spread behind your back to pull you closer to him, "I missed this." He says, knowing you won't comment on the 'I missed you' hidden behind his vellum words.

"Last time we met like this Napoleon was still emperor." You hum, a small yawn escaping you, sharp tips of shark teeth peeking from human gums. "And you had two wings." You can't help but point out, making it clear you've not forgiven him about not informing you.

Price pointedly ignores your later comment, his hand tentatively, almost shyly, reaching down to sit on top of yours. "Afraid I'll forget about you?"

His pulse picks up when you shift your hand to hold his, fingers lacing together when you don't have a tail as a human. "You wait for me." You shrug, holding your free arm up, reality wheezing for a few moments before his scale is suddenly in your hand, shiny and unharmed just as it was when he'd given it to you all those years ago. "And I dream of you."

His eyes widen and heart melts, a purr rumbling in his chest "C'mere sweetheart," He rumbles and pulls you into a kiss, free hand holding your chin stable.

You taste of salt and blood, of chilling cold and boiling heat, of something ancient and familiar and Price drinks it all down like a babe, tongue licking in your mouth and fangs nibbling on your lip, feeling you respond, the touch of hungering god as soft as silk, just to him.

But he knows this won't last.

A shark has no reason to stay on land, and a dragon can't survive underwater regardless of how much he wants. Soon you'll return to slumber, and Price won't know when he'll see you again, if he'll see you again, or if you'll learn of his passing when your waves swallow up his ashes.

He doesn't notice the prickling in his eyes but you do, wiping a stray tear with the pad of your thumb, your other hand still wrapped around his. "Don't worry John," You say, statue features finally cracking into a small smile, "I'll stay for a little while." You say and lead him into another kiss, the other members of TF141 leaving you two to catch up on lost time...

[drastrochris]

Ok, stick with me on this one:

Harrow is born, and Priamhark and Pelleamena are overjoyed. The Ninth is saved!

But there's this weird redhead baby who rudely didn't die. The horrible great-aunts don't like it, and over Aiglamene's objections, send the child up with Crux to the top of the shaft where he opens her protective suit and watches as she insolently continues to live. So he chucks her down the shaft, where she bounces a few times, cries for a bit, then eventually crawls over to a basket where she steals a leek to chew on.

A few years later, they give Harrowhark the bones, and she immediately can manipulate them, again saving the Ninth. They give some to Gideon too, and she uses them to drum on every surface, including Harrow's head. She's told "the Reverend Daughter is not a percussion instrument," before Aiglamene takes her away to start her proper Cavalier training.

"You can't die," Aiglamene informs her as she slides a sword through Gideon's stomach, "so you must do whatever you can to protect Harrowhark."

"This still hurts, you know," Gideon replies.

Instead of growing up hating each other, they're brought up as a team. They still go into the Tomb, of course, because they're kids, and have been told explicitly never to go into the Tomb.

Harrow can't understand why Gideon can't die, but as long as she agrees to sign off on delivery orders from the Cohort of "periodicals, misc" and "cookies, assorted," Gideon is perfectly happy to let her drain a bit of blood and feed her deadly poisons. Eventually, she's watched Gideon not-die from nearly everything she can think of, and picks up on a slight resonance that sings out when Gideon doesn't die.

The letter arrives, Ortus has no part in this story, and Harrow and Gideon arrive at Canaan House without incident.

Until they walk down the shuttle ramp and see everyone else staring at them. "It's like these people haven't seen an immortal hero before. Or maybe you're just too much of a butt-hurt nun for the other houses." Chaos erupts as the Seventh House cav and necromancer immediately attack them, but the body of Protesilaus falls apart quickly under Gideon's blade, and the Lady Dulcinea is subdued with only minor structural damage. Even when she screams out that she's Cytherea the First, and that she "will not be stopped by children," it's clear that she has been.

In the aftermath, Teacher is delighted. "May I call you Harrowhark the First, with your living cavalier, Gideon the First? The first perfect lyctor. No, the first lyctor of any kind to see these halls for a myriad?"

Palamedes is torn between "my beloved penpal is definitely dead" and "this angry scrungle rederived lyctorhood alone, on a planet with no resources, and with a cav who seems to be most interested in eating everyone's desserts."

Ianthe is furious, but can't quite identify why, other than she /hates/ Harrow the First's cav.

[geronimosong]

Okay, for a long time, I had a head cannon. Now that we have a great new adaptation, it is a good time to share it.

I firmly believe that the Neriad Percy meets after his fall from St. Louis Arch is Amphitrite, the Sea Goddess and Wife of Posiedon. Why do I believe this well? Firstly, she is the highest regarded Nereid, and after Amphitrite married Poseidon, the Nereids became part of their royal court.

I wasn't quite sure what to do, so I bowed. "You're the woman who spoke to me in the Mississippi River." "Yes, child. I am a Nereid, a spirit of the sea. It was not easy to appear so far upriver, but the naiads, my freshwater cousins, helped sustain my life force. They honor Lord Poseidon, though they do not serve in his court." "And … you serve in Poseidon's court?" She nodded. "It has been many years since a child of the Sea God has been born. We have watched you with great interest."

"If my father is so interested in me," I said, "why isn't he here? Why doesn't he speak to me?" A cold current rose out of the depths. "Do not judge the Lord of the Sea too harshly," the Nereid told me. "He stands at the brink of an unwanted war. He has much to occupy his time. Besides, he is forbidden to help you directly. The gods may not show such favoritism.' "Even to their own children?" "Especially to them. The gods can work by indirect influence only. That is why I give you a warning, and a gift." She held out her hand. Three white pearls flashed in her palm. - Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief

Theseus and Amphitrite, Athenian red-figure kylix C5th B.C., Metropolitan Museum of Art

Secondly, in mythology, King Minos questions Theseus's parentage with a ring thrown into the sea. Proving his connection to Poseidon, Theseus dives, carried by dolphins, to Poseidon's palace. Amphitrite treats him as a son, gifting him a purple cloak and a crown. Theseus triumphantly returns to his ship with these divine presents, reminiscent of Percy's encounter with a Nereid in "Lightning Thief."

Though Theseus proves his parentage to Poseidon, the god is not in the underwater palace. Theseus gains the ability to breathe underwater from Amphitrite. This parallels Percy's first underwater experience. You might ask why his stepmom would decide to help him; well, it is her kingdom that is at unwanted war, and Percy is her hope, too. In Riordan's own words, Poseidon and her have an open relationship:

“Most of the gods are jerks,” Delphin agreed. “And they have a lot of girlfriends even after they get married—” “Gah!” Amphitrite said. “I wouldn’t care about that. I’m not the jealous type. I just don’t want to be mistreated. I want to be my own person, do my own thing, without some man lording over me!”

As the years went by, Amphitrite discovered that Delphin was right. She did love her children even more than seabass, and most of the time Poseidon was a very good husband. He did have a lot of affairs with nymphs and mortals and whatnot, but strangely that didn’t bother Amphitrite so much. As long as Poseidon didn’t try to own her and tell her what to do, and as long as he was good to their three children, Amphitrite was cool. She was even nice to Poseidon’s demigod children, unlike some other goddesses I could name. (Cough, Hera, cough.) One time the hero Theseus came to visit, and Amphitrite treated him like an honored guest. She even gave him a purple cloak to wear, which was a sign of kingship. She’s been pretty cool to me, too. She doesn’t freak out when I leave my dirty laundry in the guest room. She makes cookies for me. She’s never tried to kill me that I know of. Pretty much all you could ask of an immortal stepmom. - Percy Jackson's Greek Gods

The description that Percy gives of Neriad matches the way he describes Amphitrite in Percy Jackson's Greek Gods, Although it could be argued that all the Neriads are described in the same Percy imagines the Neriad to resemble his mom because of the warmth she emits.

She had flowing black hair, a dress made of green silk. Light flickered around her, and her eyes were so distractingly beautiful I hardly noticed the stallion-sized sea horse she was riding. - Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief

She came in riding a hippocamps, in traditional depictions Amphitrite is represented either enthroned beside Poseidon or driving with him in a chariot drawn by sea-horses (hippocamps). It is one of her queenly attributes that separates her from the other Nereids along with her crown.

Amphitrite was gorgeous. The more she tried to avoid the gods, the more they pursued her. Her black hair was pinned back in a net of pearls and silk. Her eyes were as dark as mocha. She had a kind smile and a beautiful laugh. Usually, she dressed in a simple white gown. - Percy Jackson's Greek Gods

Amphitrite sat on a coral ledge, watching the sunset filter through the deep water and make rosy streaks in the seaweed forests. A seabass lay in her open palm, all blissed out, because Amphitrite really had a way with fish. Normally I don’t think of sea bass as cuddly, but they loved her. Delphin could see why Poseidon liked her. She radiated a sort of kindness and gentleness that you don’t see in a lot of immortals. Usually with gods, the longer they lived, the more they acted like spoiled children. Delphin wasn’t sure why, but that whole thing about getting wiser as you got older? Not so much. - Percy Jackson's Greek Gods

Hestia is the only other God that Percy has such an honorable description of in this entire book. This is significant. So, I can't wait to see if the show proves my theory to be right or not.

[acourtofthought]

I don't know if I'm being petty, but I like to think that some of Elain's actions toward Azriel are just foreshadowing for Elucien's dynamic. For example, Lucien is very thoughtful about his choices for Elain's gifts, and Elain is invested in the presents she gives to others, including Azriel, even if it's in the form of a prank. This makes me think that receiving gifts will be one of their main love languages.

The scene where Elain called Azriel's scars beautiful could mean that if Lucien still holds any insecurities regarding his scars, it'd be no problem at all for his mate to help him realize how gorgeous he is, inside and out.

And, most of all, the theme of choice would fit so much better in an Elucien romance. I mean, Azriel isn't the one banned from two courts, prohibited to see his mother, exiled in a strange land, the one who has only two humans (who will die in a few decades compared to a fae immortal life) as his only friends, and he's definitely not the one being ignored by his mate and fearful of her rejection. If there's a character who deserves (plot-wise) to be chosen, it's definitely Lucien.

Besides, it would make so much sense with Elain's and Lucien's characters and with the development of their relationship. The fact that Lucien respects her time and space (or his passivity, as some like to call it) allows Elain to make the choice of pursuing the bond when she feels comfortable and secure enough. She'd also have more agency than her sisters in the beginning of their relationships.

But these are just thoughts.

Thank you for your blog and your theories and thoughts. You make me feel hopeful not only for an Elucien's endgame, but also that they really have the chance to get the next book. You have been a light in the end of this three-years-length tunnel.

P.S. I also have a guess that the announcement will be on May 1st. Hope we are right!

Also, the scene where Elain called Az's scars pretty could actually have been Elain calling his siphons pretty because Feyre wasn't sure what she was looking at.

However, I do agree that Elain is going to find Lucien's face devastatingly handsome and the reason for that kind of ties into her mother. Which sounds weird but I'll try to explain.

Her mother made assumptions about her, that she did not dream beyond her pretty dresses and gardens and that she would marry for love and "beauty". So of course, Elain tried to follow those expectations, getting engaged to exactly who her mother would have imagined for her.

I know Elain loved Graysen and probably found him handsome but he seems cookie cutter. Even Feyre said, he was sort of the human ideal of a lord come to sweep a maiden off her feet.

Lucien's face isn't perfect. He's handsome no doubt but he has long hair (no proper mother would approve of that), a scar running down his face and his eye. He is not the image of a baby faced Lord set to inherit his fathers estate someday. He's cruelly beautiful and looks dangerous and, we're all human here, that's going to thrill the "good girls" which everyone assumes Elain to be. Graysen is the kind of guy you have missionary sex with while the lights are out. Lucien is the kind of guy you are willing to do anything, anywhere with and that's probably a bit overwhelming for Elain given her upbringing. Right now, she's still stuck in the past, how she was raised, the kind of guy her mother proclaimed she would marry rather than embracing what lights her up like a pinball machine but I have no doubt once she does break free she's going to make sure he knows exactly how appealing she finds him because of the scars, the hair, the eye. Because of how it all comes together.

And I agree regarding the gifts! I think we see bits of Elain's personality around members of the IC but she never fully blooms, it's like a quick flash then it's gone. I could see Elain and Lucien teasing one another on regular days, silly gifts, sweet little gifts, but the important days I think will be when they reserve the really thoughtful, heartfelt gifts for.

With choice, I wonder if it's so much about that as fight.

(that sounds weird too but I wasn't sure how to word it).

What I mean by that is Lucien was chosen by Jesminda. He was chosen by Tamlin. He was chosen by many friends of which we're told he has many. He was chosen by the LoA as her favorite son. The problem is nobody fought to keep him.

The same with Elain. She was chosen by Graysen, she was "chosen" by Azriel, she was chosen by the chef and servants who wanted to do nice things for her, she was chosen by her many friends. But, none of them fought for her either. When things got hard they walked away.

Lucien and Elain are parallel in that they're just accepting life as it happens to them, trying to accept that when one door closes (to their dismay) and another opens, they roll with it even if they're not happy. They haven't learned to fight for themselves, possibly because they are used to not being fought for and as a result they try not to ask for much because they realize how expendable they are to others.

But in their book, I think they'll push past that to fight for what they do want and they will fight for one another. Lucien has been doing that so far when it comes to Elain. He is the one person who despite the odds did not walk away from her. Graysen gave up after Elain was turned. Az gave up easily, moved right onto feeling calm because of another female, admiring another female, thinking of another females eyes light up, even though Elain was probably upset after his rejection for the simple fact that any rejection hurts. But Lucien though he hasn't pushed her, has quietly fought for her for two years, by showing that he is still loyal to her and only her. And I imagine we'll also see Elain begin to fight for Lucien. Fighting against those who have wronged him, fighting for him to understand that he's not guilty for Jesminda's death or what happened to Feyre, etc.

Your last paragraph before the P.S. (May 1, May 1!!!) was so incredibly sweet and I wish I had better words to thank you for it.

I hope you have a fantastic day and I appreciate your message!

[clementine-thedestroyer]

Aroura Borealis - König x reader - Part 1

Series master post- Read on Ao3

This is a multichapter fic so just to clarify, not all of these tags apply to this chapter (in fact, almost none of them do) but I do want to give people a heads up of what they're getting into, especially because this is a lot darker than my usual writing.

Part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4

Warnings/Tags: Fem!reader, eldritch!König, kidnapping, manipulation, gaslighting, violence, minor character death, end of the world, apocalypse/post-apocalypse, potential dub/non con. Dead dove, do not eat. It may not seem like it now but you've been warned. Based on/inspired by the Lemon Demon song by the same name. Alt summery: your boyfriend turns out to be an immortal being beyond your possible comprehension, but all he really cares about is making sure you're safe through the end of the world. /j but not really.

“Let’s take a month-long impromptu vacation we can’t afford to the Canadian Northern Territories.” Your boyfriend said.

“It’ll be fun,” He said.

You shouldn’t have agreed to this. You should’ve raised more questions at König’s sudden insistence to take a holiday.

But no, you’d let him bring you out here. You’d let him pack way too much for this trip. You’d let him convince you that he had the money for it. You’d let him take you somewhere so remote that you had to fly in to the closest “town” (town being a strong word for the small collection of buildings he’d shown you on google maps) on a bush plane, just to get some guy König knew from the military who knew the area to drive you up to the place you’d be staying. You let him do all of it. You’d pushed past your unease and just tried to enjoy yourself for once. And for a brief moment, everything had been fine. König had been right, you were just being weird about it.

The area was beautiful. The town was the only civilization for miles, and it was situated on the northern bank of a large, frozen river and surrounded from all other directions by boreal forest and rising mountains. 

The buildings were a charming hodgepodge of styles, sizes, and colors. The rural, unplanned community was so different from the cookie cutter suburbs and high density urban areas you were used to.

The ground was covered in dense layers of snow- packed down into makeshift trails where people would walk from building to building or towards the tree line. The wind whipped across the flat, icy plane of the river, gathering speed and picking up tiny bits of snow and ice so when it hit your skin, it felt like a thousand tiny pinpricks all at once. 

The people you met were lovely too. There was a small general goods type store towards the center of the town that König had directed you to go wait and warm up in while he talked to the guy he’d known from up here, and the elderly couple who ran it were sweet as could be. You’d bought a few basics for dinner and a cheesy little souvenir keychain from them. Not necessarily because you needed it, but because the couple who ran the store were as sweet as could be.

You chatted with the woman as she rang up your items, telling her about how König had decided to bring the two of you up here and listening when she tells you how during the summer, the cabins on the mountain side are rented out regularly for vacations, but that she’d never seen the owner rent one out during the offseason.

“Strange young man, that one.” She mutters, shaking her head and looking out the window at the man talking with König before turning back to the small register and punching in the code for a can of chili. “He’s lived up here for god knows how long and I hardly see him. Never heard him say more than a few words or take off that mask and sunglasses either.”

You frown, watching the König and the man talk outside for a moment. 

It wasn’t snowing at the moment- although the locals had assured you that you’d probably be sick of the snow by the time you left- and König and the other man stood stiffly facing each other. König had his hands stuffed deep in his pockets and wore a tense expression towards the other that didn’t quite fit the narrative of “old military friend” he’d given you. The other guy seemed much less on edge- as he was leaning against the side of the bed of what you assumed to be his truck with his arms crossed loosely over his chest. He was shorter than König and wore a fabric face mask, hat, and reflective sunglasses like the ones you’d see at outdoor stores like REI or Bass Pro Shop.

König was wearing a face covering of sorts too- as was typical for him. You knew that, on the field, he almost always wore a sniper hood (he liked to keep his work separate from you- he tried not to let you see him in full gear or anything of the sort, but as far as you were concerned, the “sniper hood” looked like an old T-shirt with eye holes). But in public, it was usually just a disposable face mask. The cold had given him an excuse to switch it up a bit though, and he’d taken to wearing a hat and scarf- with one of the scarve’s loops done loose enough that it could be lifted up and over his nose and ears to cover the bottom of his face.

The two painted a stark contrast, with König wearing carefully chosen sets of layers under his windbreaker and snow pants and looking like someone properly dressed for the weather, with the other man wearing a dark leather bomber style jacket over what looked like no more than a sweater underneath.

It reminded you a bit of when you’d see how people from warmer places would dress for the cold as opposed to people from those areas- and you’d never admit it to König, but you did find it a bit funny.

König’s friends have always been a bit odd. The face covering isn't the most out of place thing you’ve seen among them. König, himself in fact, could probably be considered a bit odd. You’ve always just chalked it up to his military career.

Once the woman had rang up your things, you bid her farewell with a smile and promised to stop by again before you headed back home.

König had made quite a fuss about your purchases when you came back out, asking why you took so long and insisting that the cabin would already have everything you needed in it, and that there was no need for “backup canned chili”, as he called it.

He had seemed nearly glued to your side that day, always keeping you close by with a protective hand somewhere on you or directing you exactly where to wait for him as he sorted out issues. Hence, you being told to wait inside the store.

After finishing with his lecture on the backup chili, König sighed and took your hand, telling you to come meet the friend he’d told you about.

He starts to lead you toward the man and his truck, and as you get closer, you can see a heavy duty set of snow chains in the vehicle’s tires. When you get close to the man, König stops, pulling you tight against his side by your waist, introducing the man to you as Horangi.

For a moment, the man was silent. Simply looking you up and down before turning his head back to König.

“This is her?” He asked, not giving you so much as a second look.

You can’t see it, but you hear the rustling of his clothes as König nods his head in response. The exchange filled you with a mix of embarrassment at being spoken about like you weren’t present and awkwardness at the palpable tension between König and Horiangi.

Another second of silence passes and Horiangi gives you another look before stuffing his hand in his pocket and pulling out his keys.

“Alright. Get in.” He says, apathy audible in his tone. He pushes himself upright from where he’d been leaning against the side of his truck and turns around, walking around toward the driver's side without another word or glance.

The whole exchange had struck you as odd, but König simply patted your back, directing you towards the passenger door.

“Sorry, Schatz. He doesn’t get out much.” He says, giving you an apologetic smile before opening the passenger door of the truck and folding down the passenger seat.

You hold back a groan at the sight of a jump seat, knowing that you’ll be stuck in the undoubtedly cramped back seat for however long the drive is. You weren’t quite sure where you were expecting to sit, as the truck only even had two doors- and König certainly wouldn’t be the one climbing into the back, but the sight of the tiny, low to the ground bench seat was enough to make your legs ache just thinking about it.

You step one foot up onto the floor of the truck, using it as a step so you can squeeze through the small space left by the folded down front seat to get into the back.

You try your best to do so gracefully and not fall face first into the back, but König resting his hand on your lower back to steady you (and not at all just so he could slide his hand down towards your ass) startles you and makes you lose your footing, leaving you to slide into the back and land on your knees with a soft “oof” sound.

You shot König a small glare, not missing the smirk he fails to keep hidden- even with the scarf covering half his face.

Once you’re situated in the backseat with your seat belt buckled and your backpack handed to you, König sits the front seat back up, and you find yourself crammed into a space that’s really only meant to hold children. Leg room as a concept is nonexistent. The seat is only half a foot or so off the truck floor and there’s barely enough room for you to sit with your feet flat.

The drive had been long and quiet, but not uncomfortably so. Horangi seemed comfortable to focus on driving, navigating the snow covered roads expertly even as they wound and doubled back on themselves, and you were happy to just enjoy the scenery, watching through the window as spruce, firs, and pine trees- all with their beaches sitting heavy from the weight of snow- pass by.

Your legs ached to be stretched after sitting in such an uncomfortable position and you’d found yourself beginning to doze off during the drive. Not quite falling asleep, but leaning your head against the window frame and letting your eyes glaze over. The flight had taken a toll on you - flights, actually. Plural. Because first there was one just to get to Yellowknife, then there was another on a bush plane to actually get to the area. And the jet lag was, frankly, a bitch. 

You were jerked out of your daze when the truck stopped and König reached back, using the shoulder of the driver's seat to brace himself, and you felt his hand envelop your shoulder as he gently shook you awake.

“Schatz, we’re here.” 

You let out a groan, sitting up and waiting for König to fold forward his seat so you could get out. 

Horangi had opened his door and gotten out the moment the car stopped, jerking the parking brake up and putting the car in park before yanking out his keys and tossing them in the cup holder, not bothering to take them with him. You stared at the keys for a moment, brow furrowing.

It was easily explainable enough. You were in the middle of nowhere, there was likely no one but you three for miles. But even then, Horangi leaving his keys in his truck made you do a double take. 

Most people would’ve slipped them in their pocket out of habit at least- but maybe your and König’s presence was simply disruptive. It was clear that Horangi either wasn’t in the mood for other people, or König calling them two “friends” had been a stretch… or maybe it was you. You wouldn’t blame him for not wanting to be a third wheel.

Regardless, you got the sense that Horangi wanted to get the two of you settled as fast as possible, even if for no reason other than to get you out of his hair.

When König folded the front passenger seat down, you first helped to hand forward the stuff that’d been put in the backseat with you for the drive before climbing out- nearly falling on your face in the process, courtesy the burning in your legs from the cramped space.

Outside of the truck, you caught your balance and looked around. Horangi was nowhere in sight and König was already moving away from the car, walking towards a narrow path that cut through the conifers. You took it as a sign to follow, reaching down to pick up two bags from where they sat in the snow.

The area where the road ended was densely wooded with spruces and firs, and the fluffy snow that blanketed the ground was undisturbed aside from your little trios’ footprints and the truck’s tire tracks.

It was cold, but König had apparently known what he was doing as far as getting winter gear for you, because the temperature was manageable, despite the wind burning your face whenever you made the mistake of looking into it.

You’d hardly had the chance to take two steps before the bags you were carrying were plucked out of your hands, making you jump and yelp as you turn to see Horangi beside you.

You hadn’t heard him approaching- a feat considering how loudly the snow would crunch as anyone walked across it. You stood frozen for a moment, watching as he took the bags from you with no more than a grunt. 

“You startled me-“ you said, trying to keep a stutter from your voice. “I didn’t hear you coming.”

“People usually don’t.” Horangi says, not giving you another look or a chance to respond before he starts down the trail.

You’re left standing there, staring at the space Horangi had disappeared to. The odd response left you drawing a blank.

You were really starting to think he didn’t like you… either that, or maybe you still weren’t used to the weirdness that came with König’s friends.

[lokiprompts]

Appropriate - Chp 1

"Introductions"

Summary: Loki x Female reader; Loki is banished to Midgard and he has to live an average life as penance...and you, a social worker, is there to help him along the way. Rom Com vibes. Pinning; emotional edging until we can't take it anymore.

Words: 5k (it's a doozy, but an important start).

Warnings: Some swearing, but otherwise fluffy, some angst.

Song to listen to while reading: Maestro

AN: I don't offer taglists anymore. Remember to reblog if you like a writer's work! Comments make my heart go pitter patter.

Next chapter here

“This is a prison, Brother.”

The Odinson brothers stood together in a nearly empty apartment within Stark Tower; Thor beaming with unbridled optimism and Loki with a scowl painted on his face. The very walls of the room made the youngest prince nauseated, the beige walls and cookie cutter interior design completely devoid of personality. It was a far cry from his grand chambers in Asgard. But this tiny apartment was now his to call home. He had arrived earlier in the day, fresh out of Asgardian prison to pay penance on Midgard.  Loki’s arrival was mostly due to Thor’s pleading, arguing to his dear father, Odin, that Loki would be punished thoroughly just by having to stay on Midgard. Thor thought he was doing his younger brother a favor and believed a stay at the tower was a lesser penance.

But what Thor didn’t know was that he was right. This was Hel for Loki.

“You’ll get used to it!” Thor said with as much enthusiasm as he could muster, but his happiness didn’t rub off on his dear brother, “I have a feeling you would like it here more than you think.”

Loki had begun to absentmindedly rub his new ‘jewelry’, magic dampening bangles that kept his seidr at bay.  They were a brilliant combination of Asgardian magic and Stark Tech in the form of golden bracelets, the left engraved with ‘Reindeer’ and the right with ‘Games’. ‘A little razzle dazzle to make Loki feel pretty’ Tony said. Loki’s eyeroll was inevitable.

The feeling of being deprived of his magic was unsettling for the sorcerer, to say the least. Even in his cell within Asgard, he could use his magic as he wished. His magic became another limb to him, something that had become second nature to rely on. A muscle memory that he did not even have to think about to command. Even his strength and speed were affected by the bangles. Now his magic, his strength, and his speed were all gone, and he was in essentially trapped in this dull room to live in with his immortality the only thing separating him from the average mortal.

He rolled his shoulders, cracking his neck in a pointless attempt to try and shrug off the sluggish feeling the dampeners gave him. Loki’s morning was spent mostly with Stark, having the bangles placed and explained to him.

“Okay Reindeer Games, no one is excited for you to be here so this is how it’s going to go,” Tony sneered, activating the technology of the bangles with a few calculated taps on his hologram monitor, “No magic, no F.R.I.D.A.Y. – you can’t leave the building and you can’t access certain areas in the tower. If you try, there will be consequences.”

Loki quirked an eyebrow, “What consequences?”

Tony grinned, booping Loki’s nose with the tip of his pen and taunting a god as if he hadn’t been tossed out a window, “That is for me to know, and for you to inevitably find out.”

Thor slapped Loki right on his back, jolting his younger brother forward and out of his memories, “It will all work out, don’t worry. I have a feeling that you will like the Servant of Workers that will come see you, I am sure!”

That got Loki’s attention. “You get your own servant here?” Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad here after all.

Thor grabbed Loki’s shoulder, giving it a gracious squeeze that made his younger brother grimace and roll his eyes, “She insists that she isn’t, but what she does clearly makes her a servant. You know, Midgard, everything is always so confused here. The Midgardian’s will catch on soon enough. Are you fine, Brother? I have a meeting with the team shortly, but I don’t want to-”

The god of mischief took a generous step away from his brother, cutting him off, “Yes, yes. I am fine. Now leave me be!”

There was a moment of hesitation where Thor’s gaze scrutinized his brother, trying to read through any potential lies. Eventually, he decided Loki’s proclamation of ‘being fine’ was good enough and he left the apartment, leaving Loki alone in the Tower for the first time. Still in his fine Asgardian leather, the sound of his boots echoed in the apartment as he took this time to give his new dwelling a proper look.

Loki was familiar with Tony’s penchant for finer things, each room ‘sparing no expense’, but the room he was in was clearly made on a budget. It made Loki wonder if Tony kept this room for people he hated. The living room was bare except for two beige armchairs and an end table, doubling as a coffee table in the center of the room. There were no books or a television. Attached to the living room was a kitchenette that had a humble stove and an even more humble sink that was large enough to hold exactly one plate, and that was being gracious. Loki turned down a short hallway to his bedroom if you could even call it that. There was a small full-sized mattress that was laid unceremoniously on the floor. Loki leaned down to gingerly touch the comforter that adorned the mattress and immediately scowled. The fabric left a greasy, gritty feeling on his princely fingers that were used to the finest of silks. Of course, the offending comforter, too, was beige. There was nothing else in the room, except for a closet that had a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie hanging up like they were the finest of suits. His ‘new prison uniform’, Loki thought with a scoff.

Seeing the set of repugnant clothes was the last thing Loki needed for the gravity of the situation to finally sink in. Tear started to prick at the corner of his eyes, and he slouched down to the ground, his back against the bare beige wall of his new bedroom. This life was a far cry from what he had in Asgard, even in the prisons. He always had the finest of meals prepared and dropped off to him. There was always a steady rotation of books and most importantly…. he had his magic. Without it, Loki felt like he lost his sense of identity. So much of himself was wrapped around his ability to use magic.

Growing up, he was always the smaller, weaker brother when compared to Thor. Even though Loki could hold his own in a battle, Thor’s brute strength always bested him in one-on-one combat, and it was their mother, Frigga, that took pity on Loki and taught him magic to level the playing field.

Frigga.

Loki let out a choked sob as memories of his mother teaching him magic as a young boy came flooding in. The quality time he shared with his mother was precious to him, even more so now that she has passed. Losing his magic felt like he lost her all over again, and it was enough to bring him to the point of breaking. Time dragged with Loki lost in his thoughts, tears now freely flowing, and before he knew it an hour had passed.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door of his apartment and Loki’s immediate reaction was to groan. Thor likely forgot something; the god was like a tick with its head borrowed so high in his brother’s business he couldn’t get out. With quiet steps, Loki stepped back out into the living room and listened, hoping that the guest would go away. Still, there was persistent, light knocking which was unlike Thor. But Loki certainly wasn’t up for guests and their questions.

“Go away, Thor! I may not have my magic, but I can still wield a knife!” Loki snarled through the door. Briefly, Loki questioned whether he even had knives in this dreadful apartment.

“Good thing I’m not Thor!” A voice called out from the other side. It was sweet, small, and charmingly melodic. The sound made his lip twitch up in a slight smile. It was the first time he smiled since arriving at the Tower and that fact was enough to catch Loki’s interest.

“And who are you, if you are not Thor?” Loki teased, inching closer to the door with each word until his nose almost brushed the wood grain.

“Um,” the voice giggled nervously. It rang clear and bright, despite being muffled by the door and it made Loki’s smile that much wider, “I am Y/N. I work for Tony Stark…well sort of. It’s complicated, but I am here to talk and help you, if that’s okay?”

The idea that anyone could help him was laughable at this point, and his dark mirthless chuckle was evident of that, “What could you possibly help me with?”

There was a shuffle behind the door, “Quite a bit, actually. Thor might have told you about me. I am the team’s social worker, and my job is to help you adjust.”

“Oh, the Servant of Workers? Yes, Thor mentioned you.”

Loki could vaguely here a curse, and a muttering of ‘damnit Thor’, making Loki bite his lip in amusement.

“Well, I am not a servant, but I can help you. We can talk if that’s okay? Can I come in, please?”

Even though he had been talking through the door these past few minutes, he suddenly became acutely aware of the dynamic of the conversation you were having and how rude it was – at least by his princely standards. He put his hand on the doorknob, but before he turned it and opened it, he flicked his wrist. When his intended magic did not come out to hide his still puffy and watery eyes, he considered sending you away. You seemed nice enough and gave him the option to decline meeting with you, but his curiosity was getting the best of him.

Wiping his eyes on the back of his sleeve, he opened the door and finally laid his eyes on you.

All breath left the god when he finally saw you, time slowed down, dreams and love had new meaning – and if he wasn’t so utterly, instantly besotted he might have rolled his eyes at how utterly cliché he was being. Greedily, his eyes raked over your form and soaked up every detail.

Your eyes were as bright as your laugh, a bit wide with surprise like you hadn’t expected him to actually open the door. The next thing he immediately noticed was your height; or you lack of it. Your small stature landed you just below his shoulders and he had to look down to see you and look he did. Stared, actually, with his mouth opening and closing as his once silver tongue turned to lead. Everything about you was stunning, no radiant, no resplendent – you’re perfection.

You, however, didn’t seem to notice his momentary brain malfunction and cheerfully offered your hand to shake, your other hand clutching some folders and a large book tightly to your chest. Loki saw how you looked between him and the rogue hand whose presence became more and more awkward the longer it lingered. ‘Do something, Loki’ he cursed mentally, yet he did nothing.

Slowly, your hand lowered and just a fraction of a frown ghosted on your lips, and it was enough to break him out of his stupor.

“Apologies – Yes, Darling. Come in, come in!”

He quickly stepped out of the way, and you walked into the apartment, stopping just past the threshold, and looking around. Suddenly, Loki was self-conscious of his beige prison. Caring about other’s opinions was something he did not display too often. Deep seeded threads of jealousy was also held close to his heart when it came to Thor, and that same heart swelling with pride whenever Frigga praised his magical skill. Of course, Odin’s opinion is a whole other layer of anger and tears, but now he found himself wanting to be in your good graces. To impress you.

Loki sped by you and his large frame overwhelmed his tiny kitchenette and began whipping open all the cupboards.

“Can I get you something?” His voice pressed and anxious, “Tea? A biscuit?” He frowned when he realized all the cupboards were empty except for one can of chicken noodle soup and a dinning set for one person. Did he even have a tea kettle? He truly had nothing.

“No, no, that is quite alright.” Loki’s frowned deepened and he looked to you, who had opened one of your files and clicked a pen to scribble some notes down. “So, like I said, my job title is a social worker and part of my job is here, and the other part is at the hospital. Majority of my job is to help you get what you need to adjust to your life in the tower.

You looked around, motioning to the practically empty apartment you both stood in.

“So, you are a servant? You fetch things for people?” You giggled and pressed your papers closer to your chest again. Already, Loki couldn’t get enough of your laugh.

“I am sure some of the people I work with think so, like Thor who won’t let that go,” You flashed Loki a pointed look that was filled with mirth, and it too made Loki laugh, “But, really, my job is to help you get adjusted. I am not at your beck and call.”

Loki leaned on the small island in the kitchenette with his elbows and limbs going every which way awkwardly. When did casually standing become so difficult?

“So, you also work for the hospital?”

Instantly, you lit up, and Loki smiled at the joy on your face, “Yes. It is my main job, actually. I work with children who have special abilities, much like yourself, and help make sure they get the care and tools that they need to succeed.”  All your words were spoken fervently and the passion you were exuding warmed Loki’s heart.

“You’re kind then? To care for children like that.” Loki felt like he was stating the obvious. You were a radiant creature who loved working with children and now forced to help a monster – his spiraling thoughts echoed in sick repetition in time with his fingers that started to anxiously tap on the island counter.

“I would hope so,” You laughed again, your eyes darting to his nervous tick. You motioned to his small hallway, “Is it okay if I take a look around?”

Loki rightened himself quickly, “Right, certainly. Right this way.” He led you down the short hallway, to his tiny bedroom with the mattress and greasy comforter on the floor. The matching frown you both wore was telling. So, this wasn’t an appropriate living situation for Midgard either. Loki started to shift on his feet uneasily from side to side when you poked around in his closet and saw the only piece of clothing hanging, the sweat suit.

“So, you will need some clothes, for sure.” You turned to him and gave him a warm smile, a smile that held no judgement for his living situation. Loki, on the other hand, has his lips in a tight line. Oh, how far has he fallen.

“I can get you some clothes from Asgard if you’d like, but that will take some time. I would have to ask Thor.” Loki flinched at the mention of his brother, “Or we can go shopping tomorrow and get some clothes here. I just need to get some approvals first.”

This perked Loki up, “I thought I couldn’t leave the tower?” He recalled his earlier conversation with Tony.

You nodded, “That is true, but I have special privileges and if I get it approved, we can go.” Suddenly, you realized he might not want to expose himself to the world outside. The god wasn’t the most welcome in this city, “Unless you prefer to stay here? I could pick some things up fo-“

“No, no, no!” He cut you off, waving his hands, “I would love to go and get out of this infernal apartment.”

Again, your laugh rang throughout the small room, and it delighted him to no end. Did you always laugh so much – Loki wondered. Wordlessly, you walked out of the bedroom and back out to the living room and motioned to one of the beige armchairs, “May I?”

“Please do.” Part of him debated if you checking in with him constantly was out of politeness or fear, but you didn’t seem afraid of him. If anything, it looked like you made yourself at home when you perched yourself upon his chair. Your lack of fear confused him. Don’t you know what he did?

“Let’s address the elephant in the room, shall we?” You started and Loki’s breath caught in his throat, fully expecting his self-deprecating thoughts to come to fruition, “The horrid furniture.”

Loki huffed out a breathless laugh, “Yes, it is quite horrible.” You handed Loki the big book you had in your lap, finally giving Loki a view of your curves. The outfit you wore was modest – a pencil skit that accented your rounded hips and a demure blouse that had its top button undone, allowing for just a peak of teasing cleavage. Loki hadn’t noticed he was staring until you cleared your throat.

“That book there, that’s a furniture catalog. You can pretty much ask for whatever you want, and I will do what I can to make it happen for you. There are a bunch of options there, so hopefully you will find something you like. I know this place is a far cry from a palace, but I sincerely hope it can become home to you in time.”

Loki wanted to roll his eyes and scoff at the idea of this beige nightmare being his home, but the warm, sincerity that shone in your eyes stopped him. There was so much hope there, a brazen plea to give this retched tower a chance, to give you a chance. He turned the book over in his hands and let his thumb flip through the pages. For you, he could try. At least for now.

“So, now that we have that settled, the next thing is figuring out how much you know about life on Midgard. Would you mind if I ask you some questions?”

Loki leaned back in his chair, his legs spread wide and bursting through his leathers. There was a moment where your eyes flickered down to his muscly thighs. It was almost too fast that he might have missed it, but he didn’t miss it. With a smirk, Loki motioned for you to continue, and you opened one of your folders, pulling out some papers and clicking your pen.

“Some of these questions may seem ridiculous to you, so please be patient with me. I heard from Thor that you are very well read and are quite intelligent, so know that this is just standard procedure even with how silly these questions are.”

Loki’s face heated up with your compliment and keen observation. He hoped the pink on his cheeks did not show up as brightly as he felt them burn, “Go ahead, Darling.”

You flashed Loki and unreadable look after hearing the pet name but carried on as if nothing happened. “So, what is your experience with cleaning? Doing the dishes, laundry, vacuuming? Things like that?”

Several emotions flashed across Loki’s face – first shock, then confusion, and finally dramatic offense, “What?! Do I look like some oaf to you?!”

Your hands flew up in defense, “Remember, it is just standard procedure. I don’t think you are an oaf at all, or anything of the like, but I need to ask these questions to determine what you may need help with. You likely might not need any of my assistance, but I must ask these questions to figure them out, okay?”

You spoke calmly, clearly, and without judgement and that aura of calmness was almost a balm to the already anxious prince. Loki decided that your questioning was way worse than his time with Stark this morning. At least with the genius, he could hide behind his dripping sarcasm and cleverness, but around you he felt naked, vulnerable. It was unnerving.

He sat back as you repeated your question, folding his arms and essentially closing himself off from you. The prince took the time to ponder the question and he realized he never had cleaned a dish himself in all his thousand years of existence, let alone did his own laundry. If he did need to clean something himself, he had his magic to rely on. And what was a vacuum? If there was one thing Loki didn’t like, it was not knowing something and what made it worse, that fact was going to be made painfully obvious to you. So, he did what he did best.

He lied.

Everything you asked him, he exceled at. Cooking? A master chef. Cleaning? Meticulous to a fault. Midgardian technology? Child’s play. The whole assessment took approximately an hour, and it was the highlight of Loki’s horrible day. Conversation flowed freely between you two after he allowed himself to relax and be comfortable around you. The sound of your laughter bouncing off the walls and the soft smiles made Loki feel something that he hadn’t felt in a very long time. A flicker of warmth in his cold, closed off heart. Just a man, and not the monster he knew himself to be. At least for now, with you, he could pretend.

After your last question, you tucked your papers back in your folder and stood up with the smile that Loki had come to know and appreciate during your short time with him.

“Well, it seems my predictions are right, and you don’t need any help with anything here on Midgard.”

Loki smirked, “Of course not, Darling.” Again, you scrunched your nose at the pet name before making your way to his front door and spinning around, offering your hand that held a small card.

“It was great meeting you, Loki. It seems outside of getting what you need in this apartment, you won’t need my help at all. I will have some food and provisions delivered up to you later today and I will, hopefully, if the approvals go through, pick you up tomorrow morning to go clothes shopping. You can let me know what you decide on furniture then.” He gingerly took the card from your hand and looked at it. It contained your name, a phone number, and where your office was located within the tower.

“And then after that, you won’t have to see me ever again!” You chirped, meaning for it to be playful since it was obvious Loki hated this apartment, the tower, and you assumed, you as well. Little did you know that innocent statement had sent Loki’s reeling. These….feelings, feelings? Feelings for you were new, confusing, and Loki was convincing himself that they weren’t feelings at all, but instead an infatuation because of his recent forced living situation. Just something to pass the time. But he couldn’t ignore the panic that was starting to settle in his chest at the mere thought of never seeing you again.

Loki was so caught up in his emotional crisis of the heart to even notice that you had left, and you were already making your way down the hall and away from him.

“W-wait!” Loki called out, sounding a bit more panicked than he would like, but it made you stop in your tracks and turn. That made it worth it.

“What can I help you with?” You asked, after Loki’s long legs ran him straight to you in record time. For the first time, in well, ever, Loki felt slightly winded from the exertion. He placed a large hand on his chest as his breathing settled. Damn, these bangles!

“Well, Um..Well, you see – Here’s the thing…” Loki stammered, his hands stretched out and pleading while his mind tried to come up with a reason to get you to stay. You stared at him as he rambled on, not saying anything, with your ‘this man is crazy’ expression well-hidden underneath your professional mask.

“I lied.” Loki rushed out.

“What?”

The young god rubbed the back of his neck, and your eyes caught the stray curls that lived back there, free from his onslaught of gel, “I actually don’t know any of the things you asked me about.”

“What?” You repeated. Your eyes furrowed in confusion. Loki’s intelligence and cleverness was known by the Avengers, and you had believed every word he said when you went through the assessment. He even provided examples and lofty tales of his time in the kitchen or cleaning his chambers in Asgard when the maids were sick! And he lied?

You found yourself asking him about those very scenarios and if they were true or not in a tone that wasn’t as warm as when you first met him, Loki noticed. You didn’t like being lied to, that much was clear.

“I know, I know, I am sorry, Darling, but things have been….hard for me.” His voice lowered to a shame filled whisper, “I am a prisoner here, I know, getting the sentence I deserve, but I lost my magic, my home. The last thing I have is my mind, and I didn’t want it to be known that I couldn’t do, or understand, such simple things. I truly am sorry, Darling. Will you please help me?”

It was the sincerest Loki has ever been and it surprised and horrified him to know that all the things he said were true, and he was saying them to you. A stranger. But every time he looked at you, something deep within him told him he could trust you. It was a new feeling, a strange and confusing one, but one that Loki found himself welcoming with open arms.

“Okay, I will,” Loki let out a long, relieved exhale at your words, “But, no more lying, okay? We can’t work together if we aren’t honest with each other.”

The God of Lies gritted his teeth, instantly regretting his choice and feeling the first pang of guilt for lying to you, “Of course.”

“Do you have time to talk about some things now?”

“My schedule is wide open,” ‘Painfully open’, Loki thought. Again, he followed you back into his apartment and you walked into his kitchenette.

“Since you don’t know that much about cooking, we are going to do go over some basics. I will be ordering some food and other provisions for you, but it will all be very simple things. Canned foods, microwaveable meals, things like that until we have a more formal cooking lesson. Sound good?”

“Sounds perfect.” Loki’s heart fluttered at the mere prospective of even more time with you. The feelings of guilt for lying to you already a distant memory as he indulged himself in your radiant presence.

You walked over to the microwave that sat over the tiny stove, “This is a microwave. Have you used one before?”

Loki shook his head no and stepped right up to you, watching your every move. You turned your attention back to the appliance and started to explain the intricacies of using it. Loki, however, was not paying attention to a word you said. Instead, he was admiring all the little details that made you, you. First, he admired your long eyelashes, long and curled and they framed your eyes perfectly. Different colors floated about in your iris, little flecks that sparkled. There was also a slight flush to your cheeks, a rosy hue and he wondered if you could be blushing because of him. But his favorite part, oh his favorite part was your mouth. Loki’s eyes followed the curve of your cupid bow and around the edge of your soft, pillowy lips. Your mouth was moving, but he wasn’t listening.

“Most packages just show…..” Your sweet voice faded in and out of his ears as he watched you, “And don’t ever, ever put….”

Loki found himself leaning into you. His nose just lightly brushing against your hair for a light whiff, but that feather touch was enough to have you whip around to face him. Your eyes went wide at the realization of how close he was and how much he towered over you. You took a tentative step back and it made Loki frown.

“Do you have any questions?” You asked, your billowy lips now in a straight line.

“No, your lesson was quite enlightening, Darling. I shall become an expert of this…microwave…in no time.” He could feel the unease radiating off you. Why did he let himself get so close?

“Wonderful. I will see you tomorrow for clothes shopping, okay? Have a good day, Loki.” And with that you left, and Loki was alone yet again. The apartment felt empty, and cold now that you had left. The life bringing warmth that you brought followed you right out his door.

The rumbling in his stomach broke him out of his thoughts. He wasn’t sure when your food delivery would be happening, but he remembered the lone can of soup in his cupboard. He opened it and pulled the top off, unaware of how lucky he was since he didn’t have a can opener. The salty, savory smell of chicken noodle soup wafted up to his nose and he decided it was satisfactory enough. He dumped the contents of the can in his only bowl and stirred it with his only metal spoon.

He put the bowl in the microwave, spoon and all, carefully so he didn’t spill. Closing the door, he looked at the numbers on the appliance. It was then he realized he hadn’t listened to a word you said during your entire explanation of how to use this contraption. With a careless shrug, he punched in thirty minutes. He remembered helping his mother make a stew in the palace once and he thinks that is how long it took, but that was centuries ago.

For a few seconds, Loki watched the contraption light up and the bowl spin, but he quickly grew bored and sat down in his armchair. He ran his fingers through his hair and groaned. How was he going to live like this? Surely, he would waste away from boredom. Loki leaned back in his chair, letting his head fall back and soon the exhaustion from the day overtook him and he fell asleep.

Screaming smoke alarms woke him up with a start, and his wrists, they were burning. He cried out in pain and collapsed on soft carpet of his living room just as shield agents burst into his apartment, knocking the door right off its hinges.

“Get him!!”

[legoflowrs]

HEAD CANNONS:

cw: tiny bit of nsfw, drug use, abuse, drinking, smoking

AGED UP TO 18 PEOPLE!!!

Kenny McCormick

- Kenny has a southern twinge thanks to his parents. They moved from Texas early on into Kenny’s life but thanks to always being surrounded by it he inherited it.

- Kenny works at least 2 jobs for most of high school. He has always been financially independent and wants to make sure he can take care of Karen.

- Lowkey a mamas boy always felt bad for Carol and tried to help her when he could.

- His Dad never hit him but he has always been pretty emotionally and verbally abusive, especially when he was drunk.

- This doesn’t deter Kenny from drinking but he’s the complete opposite of his Dad when he’s drunk. Kenny is a nice drunk, telling all his friends how much he loves them.

- Kenny has done all the piercings he has himself. Definitely had at least 6 in each ear and he’d probably have shark bites as well as a nose ring.

- Kenny LOVES tattoos. He’s done a few stick and pokes on himself but he met someone who did a professional one on him. He saved up for ages to get it. It’s a lark tattoo which is Karen’s favourite bird. He got it on his forearm.

- Karen is super into helping animals so every Saturday Kenny drives her to the animal shelter.

- His favourite cookie is snickerdoodles because his Grandma used to send them to his family every Christmas before she passed away.

- He has a truck that’s his passion project. I genuinely believe he went into a mechanic’s apprenticeship when school finished. He’s very smart and very handy with tools as he had to fix a lot of shit growing up.

- Kenny skates a lot. It’s a good stress reliever and it gives him adrenaline without the danger of him dying.

- Speaking of which he is still immortal but he got smarter with it when he grew up.

- I firmly believe in pansexual Kenny supremacy! He doesn’t care who you are if he likes you he likes you.

- WOLF CUT KENNY!!!!!

-Thrifting god! He’s what every tik tok girlie wants to be. I head cannon he goes thrifting with Heidi cause she’s super environmentally conscious.

- He’s friends with everyone! I think as they grew older he became super close with Stan. They bond over their shitty family’s.

- Eased up with the drugs over time after Karen found him after he overdosed in their bathroom once. Usually sticks to weed.

- Has hooked up with Henrietta (she thinks he’s the only somewhat okay conformist in south park and they usually smoke together after), Bebe (this caused a massive rift between him and Clyde), Red once or twice and Tammy.

- He flirts around a lot but doesn’t sleep around as much as people think.

- He would be extremely respectful in a long term relationship but he just hasn’t found the time to take care of anyone other than himself and Karen.

- Loves camping!!! He is very rugged and keen on doing heaps of stuff outdoors since he didn’t have that much to entertain himself growing up.

- Listens to all types of music but especially loves soft rock! It helps him mellow out.

- Would move out with Stan! Until him and Kyle started dating.

- Great with kids !!

- He pushed Stan to confess his feelings for Kyle and to this day takes credit for their relationship!

- Regularly works out! Made a makeshift home gym and Stan and Kyle join him often.

- Distanced himself from Cartman after he realised what a piece of shit he was.

- Was Majorines biggest support when she transitioned! They are super close and Kenny has a very soft spot for her.

- Hangs out with Craig to smoke and they talk about life (a little OOC for Craig but whatever lol).

- Kenny has a scar on his left eyebrow from the first time he died. It never went away and serves as a permanent reminder that he should be more careful.

- Defs a MILF lover lol.

- Drinks oat milk, Heidi put him into it.

- Him and Karen went vegetarian for a while!

- Super sporty, played football for a while but dropped it when he got bored. Stuck with track for most of high school.

- Smart but didn’t apply himself at school! Would skip often and was the guy everyone hated to be in group projects with.

- Plays the base. Did a stint with Stan in a band for a while. They still regularly play with Marj and Jimmy just for fun.

- A GOD at multiplayer video games. No one wants to verse him anymore.

- Still has his collection of playboys lol. Too attached to throw them out but would die if Karen saw them (she has seen them).

- Country music is his guilty pleasure.

- Smokes cigs but switched to vaping when Karen complained about the smell.

- Played Ice Hockey with Stan for a while.

- Was in the wedding party for both Creek and Style.

- Pre Karen complaining about the smell of cigs he smelt like cigarettes, motor oil and cinnamon.

Kenny in a relationship

- Physical touch!!!!!! That’s his main love language. Would always have his hands on your waist, the small of your back, holding your hand, stroking your hair!!

- He also loves acts of service. Your milk is running low? He runs to the store and tops it up. Light bulb went out? Changes it without even being asked.

- He’s pretty experienced with sex. Loves giving and making you feel good. It’s pretty much a reward for him.

- Whole heartedly loves you, would never even consider cheating. Super loyal!

- Loves going to the drive ins for a date! It was his first date with you and he has a soft spot for it.

- You cook and he cleans!!

- Wants to be friends with your friends and wants you to like his friends. His world is yours too when you guys are dating.

- You babysit Karen often even though she’s older now. I definitely think she’d love having a sort of older sibling to go to.

- Whenever Kenny sees you with Karen he gets instant baby fever lol and often you know what ensues.

- You bought him a record player for his birthday and he just about died. You guys slow danced for hours.

- He will be there any time of day or night to pick you up.

- I think he’ll know pretty early on he wants marriage. Keeps it to himself for a while until you guys have been in a committed relationship.

- Loves seeing the little fashion shows after you go shopping he thinks it adorable.

- Gotten to the point where if you aren’t in bed with him he doesn’t really sleep well.

- I think he has an anxious attachment style but that’s definitely worked on!

- Will take you camping even if you don’t like it lmao.

- Makes you a playlist on a CD because he’s an old man.

- Uses your body wash cause he’s a cheap bitch….

- Loves breakfast in bed.

- Would have double dates with y’all and Style and Creek occasionally.

- You get on with Majorine like a house on fire. At first you were very insecure of her because you knew at one point Kenny had a thing for her but he’s actually good at reassuring you, that you’re the one he wants.

- You guys aren’t prefect, when y’all fight it can be explosive and he usually goes for a drive but he can’t stop thinking about it.

- Decided to go to couples therapy when you got engaged to work some things out before y’all committed to marriage.

- Obsessed with you lol 10/10 partner.

A/N: first post kinda nervous lmao. kenny is my fav love him to bits. idk if any of these are kinda OOC but this is just for funsies! Also added his moodboard slay vibes.

[harveywritings92]

[Random magic au: Witch! Reader summons Reaper! Ghost to give a brief  explanation about immortals after Soap showed up at her door panicked, Simon appears in her livingroom looking sheepish while holding a cookie.]

Ghost: I was at a party y’know

R/n: oh, sorry. We’ll be quick, I need your help.

[Ghost perks up as Soap explains a theory that a former enemy of his, Graves; who he thought was dead. May be immortal and wandering the earth after supposedly seeing him around town the night before...]

Ghost, to Soap: There’s no such thing as true immortality, for humans anyways, He’d have to be very well versed in the old magic, or have some sort of pact with a god or demon….(to R/n) May I go now?

R/n: Oh, er, yes! I hope it’s a good party.

Ghost, gives her his cookie: Hmm, I think it might go downhill at about midnight…

R/n, nibbling on said cookie: Why?

Ghost: that’s when they’ll be taking my mask off…

(He calmly lifts his mask up and there’s flash of lighting showing Simon’s true skeletal face under the glamor spell he’s wearing, R/n nods and snaps her fingers teleporting Ghost away.)

====================

{R/n and Ghost have such a pact, Apparently contracting with a god or demon has both it’s perks and consequences. While under the god of death’s protection they’re essentially un-killable and can use high leveled magic. The down side? If she gets hurt severely then the pain from said injury is much worst than average. Let’s say that R/n broke her legs? Well good news! It’ll heal almost instantly, Bad news? Every step she takes after that feels like the bones in her legs are breaking all over again. So, yeah.. She needs to be very careful when out doing jobs. ]    

[reashot]

RWBY And the Ruinous Powers.

Ruby: Oh no it's Salem!

Salem: Ha, ha, ha, ha. I'm going to wipe out all lives on Remnants. And there's nothing you can do about it.

Weiss: There is no way we can beat her. She's can't be destroyed.

Blake: We're doomed... Doomed...

Yang: If only there's someone, anyone that can save us...

Khorne: Have no fear ladies!

Slaneesh: Because we can help you with that.

Tzeentch: And then some with the power of Chaos(tm.)

Nurgle: Observes. Now begone. You female demon... Thing.

Salem: Oh I've been defeated by the awesome power of Chaos(tm.)

Oh I'm melting, melting! What a world...

*slumps to the ground*

Ruby: Yay! Thank you for saving us Chaos Gods!

Blake: We can't possibly defeat Salem all on our own.

Weiss: (especially not with our studio getting canned.)

Yang: Ehh... Can you please tell us more about this Chaos(tm.) Grandpa Nurgle.

Nurgle: Why I'm glad you ask... *looks down* Yang.

Salem: If you need me I'll be in my trailer.

Khorne: Chaos(tm.) is the truth of the world. A primordial force.

By becoming a member it will gives you power beyond your imagination.

Slaneesh: Not only power but also pleasure you cannot hope to dream.

Tzeentch: Also knowledge. Don't forget the knowledge.

If you call now. Our number is 1432-CHAOS-RULZ.

Remember it's 1432-CHAOS-RULZ.

Our great communication team will help you with the transition.

Erebus: Answering phone call is my personal hell. And if you don't call me right away you are actually not doing your part in punishing me. And you don't want me to be happy do you?

Tzeentch: And all it cost is just the low, low price of your immortal soul.

Ruby: Wow I did not know that Chaos(tm.) was so good.

In fact I'm so convinced that I'm becoming a member right now.

By joining Chaos it not only help me with my day to day task. But tear and rend my enemy into unrecognizable bits. And I have Khorne to thank for teaching me to channel my anger into destructive causes.

Blood for the blood God, skull for the skull throne. And Milk for my cookies.

Khorne: *sniffs* I'm so proud.

Weiss: And by joining Chaos. I become a better person. I'm no longer racist towards people who are different to me.

Nurgle help me realize that we are all just a piece of meat of that are slowly rotting away in a cold uncaring universe. And the only solace we can find is with each others.

Nurgle: I couldn't agree more Weiss. I hope we can spread our beliefs to more people that need it.

Blake: With me. I actually become a better writer With Tzeentch helping me with my writing I actually gain 50 new followers by posting a spicy fic. Isn't that right Tzeentchy.

Tzeentch: *thousand yard stare* ... I have forseen many things in my existence and not even I can unsee the thing I saw. I mean I think I can but you will never know.

Yang: With Slaneesh I even done thing I would never have done previously. All the debauchery and all manners of pleasureable thing I done that I can't repeat in polite company... Actually help alot in dealing with my anger issues. Seriously if you can only worship one Chaos God. Then Slaneesh can be considered the best pick.

Slaneesh: Yes... By joining Chaos there is no limit to what you can gain. So what are you waiting for and sign up now!

Caution: Joining Chaos may cause numerous health problems, such as; Blood leaking from every orrifices in your body, new apendages growing, lost of one soul, seeing demons, summoning demons or giving birth to demons and all manners of bodily & spiritual horror. If problems persist please consult your local apothecary to see whether Chaos is right for you.

[authorchia]

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚ 𝚂𝚖𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚎𝚊 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚔𝚢, 𝚕𝚎𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚕 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚝 𝚏𝚕𝚢. ⋆｡𖦹 °

𝚅𝚊𝚗 𝙼𝚘𝚛𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚘𝚗

AHA! I knew I would make a dedicated post for my personal r1999 crack ship! If you see this post you're in for a ride because I will make you interested in this ship~

As you may know from the title, I ship Shamane x Eternity, or I also like to call it SeaGoat/Capricorn. I already have a few reasons and headcanons for this couple, so heads up! Long post incoming below!

💙 Ship name origin

It was a usual day in the r1999 discord server, and at that time they were talking about ships and stuff. I playfully asked if there's a good name for my ShamaNity ship. Then I got a revelation that I can call them SeaGoat because of Shamane's udimo and Eternity's sea/ocean theme! And one of the members said "...Capricorn". At first I was confused so I googled it AND I FOUND OUT CAPRICORN IS A SEA GOAT! "THIS IS GENIUS" I said, so that's how I adopt the ship name! Though I know it doesn't really fit with one of Eternity's voiceline. But if I name it OceanGoat... it's- uh- you get the point.

💙 Their dynamics

Good lord, they give off so many dynamics... But looking at their voicelines and in-game lore:

1. I can pretty much tell they're both yappers (in a good way). Eternity talks about mostly about seafood and about her experience as an immortal, while Shamane talks all about his journey being a shaman and some giving food to us (Vertin). I can see them talk back and forth about their experiences from their respective lives. They could know how each sees the world through the eyes of a mortal and an immortal. I like to think the suitcase feels lively as the both of them always talk to each other, no matter the time or circumstances (✿ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)⁾⁾

2. THEY'RE BOTH OLD. In the current global roster, Shamane is the oldest of all the male characters (being 45 y/o) while Eternity is the oldest of all the female characters (being over a century old because she's a vampire). They definitely act like an old married couple. They'll be the suitcase crew's parents like isn't that just the sweetest thing?

3. Their Ultimate animation Just look at these!!!

Shamane represents the sky while Eternity represents the sea/ocean, and it really tickles my neurons thinking about it. NOT TO MENTION Shamane's ultimate also has what it looks like some sort of lake? The point is that they both have something to do with water on it!

4. They both can fill their loneliness This more just me doing some headcanon, but from Eternity's voicelines, I can tell she's pretty lonely. Being an immortal has its advantages but also comes with a price. I haven't seen Shamane's full backstory, but judging from the trailer, he definitely went through a lot on his journey to become a shaman. As the two gets closer, Eternity would find him amusing yet inspiring for he's still alive after going through so much as a mortal and Shamane would find her intriguing and would be curious about the immortal's life. They slowly find solace with each other, the shaman receiving simple yet genuine love and care while the vampire gets to have someone who can have fun and relax together. Though Eternity knows they won't last forever, for Shamane's life is nothing but temporary in her eyes. She will be lonely in the end, like she always have, but at least she got to experience something new...

💙 Last words

Aaaaaand that's the end of why I ship them! If you made it this far, WOW! You certainly are a reader, my friend! Have a cookie for compensation~ 🍪

[astrolionking]

Daughters of Death + Puss In Boots (redesigns)

The original designs weren’t working for me and my artstyle for this movie changed so here y’all go, the idiot children for two idiots

Alma II (She/They, Panromantic)

The first born triplet, she is named after Muerte’s sister, Life

She’s very much the one that enjoys life, takes things slow and values everything around her. She can connect to nature spiritually and that’s what gives her her appreciation for life

She’s the “older” triplet so naturally she leads things the most and comes up with plans. Don’t mistake this for being completely responsible, she’s an idiot that will lose her sisters in a store

She passed at 17 during an ambush

Viva (She/Her, AroAce)

The second born triplet

She is a rowdy girl that will bite an ankle so her dads have to keep her in check. She’s the dumbest of all the sisters only because she acts impulsively but she learns to stop and think, she actually has good ideas

She is the next Puss In Boots but Puss worries she will be exactly like he was before he learned his lesson. He planned to give her his black wedding dress if she got married but she turned out to be AroAce so he made it into a casual outfit she can wear.

After Alma’s death, Viva learned she had only eight lives left. After such a traumatic experience, she actually became less impulsive and it only pushed her to be a hero so no innocent person like her sister will die like this

Bella (She/They, Demigirl + Lesbian)

The last born triplet, she is a wolf/cat hybrid

She is quiet but she definitely isn’t shy. She just prefers to keep quiet. When she moves, she practically floats. She takes after Muerte a lot but she has a lot to learn.

She becomes the next Death (Muerte doesn’t go anywhere, Bella just becomes a second Death) and wears the cloak Alma wore constantly

After Alma’s death, Bella found out she was immortal and that’s what made her realize SHE was going to be the next Death. She didn’t want to do it and her sister’s passing caused her to have panic attacks. Muerte understands this but she has no other choice so he helps her slowly.

Puss and Muerte (parent headcanons and stuff)

After having the girls, Puss decided to retire completely to take care of his girls

Muerte never expected to have kids so, naturally, it was a lot to process but when he held his girls, everything changed and he cherishes them

For a LONG while, Muerte didn’t tell them he was Death until… well… Alma…

Puss spoils his baby girls and no matter how old they are or how taller they are than him, he treats them like babies

Muerte isn’t the “strict” parent like people expected him to be but he IS the scary one and will silently threaten people who even LOOK at his daughters the wrong way

Puss isn’t strict but he is usually scared for his daughters’ safety

Viv is the closest to Puss and Bella is the closest to Muerte (especially after Alma’s passing)

Muerte and Viv definitely started to argue a LOT when she became a teenager and it will result in Viv crying bc she thinks her father hates her (she’s a tough cookie but she’s also a daddy’s girl) and Muerte feeling horrible for yelling at her. Puss obviously has to mediate and Bella stays the fuck out of it cause fuck that

At the end of it all, Muerte apologizes and reassures her that he loves her

[at1nys-blog]

Thunders leaving hints

Pairing: not much of a pairing to be honest

Summary: something out of the ordinary happens and Percy Jackson is furiously mad

A/N: I know I have WIPS piling up but shhhh. Also this was based on a post by @awesome-shoes-with-wings and I had to write this just for fun so is not as good as my other works but is something. For the requests, I’ll be finish them shortly I hope

They didn’t know where they were going, the only thing they knew was that wherever was safer than what it was supposed to be home.

New York had been chaotic the past couple of weeks both for the mortal world and the…immortal one.

They knew about the monster living among humans, knew about the gods and goddesses watching over them. The deities appeared in their dreams every now and then leaving cryptic messages that only made sense in dreamland.

The last one was the most weird message they received, talking about a camp in Long Island where they could stop by for a while before starting their journey back again.

It took them a couple of days, walking around the forest to finally see the entrance of the so called Camp Half Blood. Before stepping in, they looked around, making sure no monster were after them, if they were they didn’t want for the campers to be in danger.

Something, stroking their leg made them jump out of their skin but when they noticed it was just a cat, once again, they felt relieved.

“Why do you guys keep scaring me like that.” They started saying while getting down on the animal level. “Thank you for keeping me good company.” They added before taking out of their backpack a cookie to give the cat a piece of it. “Okay now…” standing up they took a deep breath. “Let’s do this.” And they stepped foot at camp.

Hestia was minding her business when she saw the kid getting inside, eyes still on the situation she called Zeus over.

“I think you need to claim them as soon as possible before Perseus pays us a visit.” The father of the Gods was caught unprepared for this, choking on his ambrosia.

“I don’t have kids to claim.” He said frenetically, looking around hoping his wife wasn't around, who knows what she might think of this.

“Are you sure?” The Goddess asked, she just wanted to make sure they were not going to get a visit from Percy anytime soon. She loves the kid, dearly, he is a sweet boy but she knows how scary he can be, just like his father’s domain.

“I’m 100% sure THAT is NOT my kid to claim. If anything they look like they could be Hera’s kid if she was anything like me.” Thunder, at the mention of Hera’s name, there were thunders which surprised both Zeus and Hestia.

“Are you so scared of her you can’t control your thunders?” Joked the Goddess but again, it wasn’t Zeus.

The two deities dropped the conversation there, if his brother claimed that wasn’t his kid after mentioning Percy Jackson than Hestia cpuld believe he was telling the truth. That was not his kid.

Percy Jackson was furious, it had been three hours since this kid got at camp at the Gods didn’t say a word yet. He made it clear, they were to claim their kids as soon as possible.

For the son of Poseidon it had been a struggle the first hour with the new camper, but everyone talked some sense into him, wait, maybe their godly parent is busy with something, but Percy was sure it wouldn’t be difficult to just send a little message even while busy. They didn’t had to drop at camp, looking at their kid and saying ‘yep that’s mine’ they just had to send a little glowing little symbol, nothing that would take literally a second.

“I’m going to talk to them. They are coming with me” He couldn’t wait longer.

“Whoah whoah whoah. Hold your horses man, Annabeth and Chiron asked you to wait until tonight. Maybe their parent is busy.” Stopped him Grover.

“Man, I love you, I do but I’m pretty sure is like sending a text message. You can do it everywhere you are, whatever you are doing.” It was a fair point, the satyr agreed.

“Okay, but what if…” the glance that Percy sent him scared his best friend, who just shut up. There was no way he would make him change his mind. “You are scary.” Grover commented under his breath, praying the Gods Percy didn't hear him.

“They only had one job. One hell of a job.” Another set of thunders and lighting rumbled on Earth. “Don’t get mad at me Zeus, fix that or else…” he shouted at the sky. “I’m going to take a shower since I have to wait. Keep them company.” He said pointing at the new kid, who was having something to eat with the Hermes’ kids.

Three hours and yet nothing. Zeus called a meeting 30 minutes after he noticed no one was going to claim the new camper but all the major Gods came with the same answer ‘is not mine’ but how was that even possible?

It wasn’t a kid of the minor deities either and he was going crazy about this.

“Can you guys tell me who is so stupid to go against Perseus?” It came out naturally, everyone looking at Zeus confused. “What? That kid is worst than Poseidon here.” The God of the sea was smirking, proud of his boy being feared by his “all mighty” brother.

“Not to be that Goddess but have you noticed they attract cats like they are catnip? Could that be used to find who between us is their parent?” Said Athena and, as if a lightbulb turned on in their little godly brains, everyone agreed, and the twelve gods turned their head to Artemis.

“You people have to be kidding me. I swore celibacy.” Her words did not affect the deities. “I would give up immortality than laying in bed with a man.” Disgust filled her tone at the use of that word.

“It was worth the shot.” Commented Apollo. “So who else here loves cats.” He added looking deep into Ares’ eyes.

“Stop staring at me.” If anything Apollo’s gaze on him intensified. “Oh for the love of me, just because I had a cat as a partner ONCE now that means every kid that like cats is mine?” The war God had to take a step away from Apollo, not standing the way he was looking at him so close and so deep. “Look if that weakly thing was mine I would send something else to keep them safe.” He added which only made the Sun God coo and teased him for being a softie. “I’ll show you how much of a softie I am…”

“Stop it. If you keep fighting between one another, we will never find out who between you created them. Now…” started Hera, who only wanted this day to be over.

“Maybe is one of the nymphs’ kid?” Suggested Dionysus.

“Man you should really shut your mouth. If that was the case we wouldn’t be here.” Iris interjected before anyone else could. “Listen, that one is not mine okay? Now I need to go.” And she left, just like this but she knew the others would believe in her words, she wasn’t one to lie. On the other hand… The pro liar between them did not say a word yet which Hecate had to point out.

“What if the cats are just a disguise? What do you think about that Hermes?” Oh Gods if she was having the time of her life at this exact moment. Knowing who the demigod belonged to was so much fun, she had to thank Freya for this. “Isn’t it weird that he didn’t say anything? Maybe they are yours? Or do you know something?”

“The only thing I know is that my wings are killing me right now. Good me, I never flew this much in ages.” He said.

“Why are you avoiding my questions? Am I right? Are they yours?” Of course she was mistaken but Gods if she was loving it. Now she understood why Eris loves to create dramas.

“That is not my kid. As Ares here, I take pride in my children’s talent and they are not good enough to be my kids.” Thunders once again. “Zeus you really need to check on your thunders. If the go ballistic once again I might start crying.” cried Hermes. While everyone was trying to figure out who was behind the kid’s creation Hecate was having so much fun, trying her best to not laugh at their faces.

It was at the end of the day, when Percy came to Mt. Olympus looking at the twelve Gods with eyes filled with rage that Hermes had an enlightment.

“Uhm guys, I think I might know why we couldn’t find out who is their parent.” Hestia and Hera rolled their eyes, while everyone else was so ready to jump him. “Is because their godly parent is from another pantheon.” Thunders started rumbling in the background, like a laugh.

“Dad stop this.” Zeus' kids said in unison.

“Is not me.”

“Is not him, that is Thor laughing at us. He had been sending them all day long, how could I not notice that sooner?” At the gods faces turning into a question mark, Hermes just sighed. “Didn't you noticed he would use thunders every time we belittled the kid? No one? Really? Wow.”

“So, you are saying that there are other Gods out there? And they still don’t claim their off spring? Alright, can you tell me where they are? I need to take it out on someone.” And Percy was ready, so ready to knock some good manners into the Gods, he didn't care if they are powerful being that could easily kill him.

The gods had to block him there before he went on doing something stupid.

“Kid, that is so nice of you but they are already claimed, pretty much since birth.” said Hermes, knowing about you from Loki.

“The cats.” The other said in unison.

“This is why Loki called me last week and asked me so many questions about Camp Half Blood.” Oh, that God was in for a good group jump.

Leaving Mt. Olympus Percy was content with the outcome: the new kid was already claimed, the Greek gods had nothing to do with it and another pantheon was revealed to exist. ANOTHER PANTHEON EXISTS?! He wished those Gods didn’t like him very much but with his luck? He was ready to get a quest the second he walked back into camp.

“I just hope it is local and I don’t have to go to Canada once again.” If only he knew what the Fates had in store for him.

[themissinghand]

One Piece: Of Sweet Donuts and Fortune Cookies [3]

Part 1! Part 2!

Summary: In which every child loves sweets, and loves her otherworldly treats. (Or Katakuri loves someone who's a liar)

Pairing: A little bit of Charlotte Katakuri x Immortal! Female! OC-insert

Note: This is the final part of this series! The female OC is a transmigrator that came from the modern world who (somehow) became immortal, and is more than what Katakuri ever expected.

You Cake My Breath Away

Katakuri starts to notice things about her.

From the way she dresses differently every day, to the way she smiles.

From the way she treats her customers to the way she loves her brother.

It's becomes vibrant, a light in his life.

She welcomes him and his siblings without hesitation and always gives them treats.

She doesn't have any greedy eyes that Katakuri always sees nor the hidden contempt behind her back.

So when Katakuri has finally realized he's just as tall as her, he could see her squarely in the eyes and realize that her eyes are like jewels.

It's so strange. 

He's never been so confused before. 

And it seemed like he was the only one who seems to act this way. 

It's not like him. 

He's supposed to be the perfect child, the perfect son of the notorious Big Mom. 

What's wrong with him?

"Perhaps adoration is what you are feeling." Theseus says casually, though for once his smile seems a little too tense. 

"However, I would like to advise you to give up. My lady only sees you as a child."

Katakuri had a sudden urge to fight the man, but he held back when Theia ran out of their storage room in a rush. 

"Theseus, my brother! Look! I finally made brownies!" She cheers and Theseus congratulates her as if he didn't just threaten Katakuri. Then she turns to Katakuri with a surprised smile. 

"Kata! Sorry to keep you waiting, but do you want to try my brownie? It's a new food item I'm planning on adding to the menu!" When she offered it to him, he took it and had a bite. 

It was delicious as always, and so so sweet. Katakuri nods with a satisfied smile, making her happy. 

"Okay, but what's up? You're all dressed up and everything today." Katakuri stills, and then remembers that this visit had a purpose. 

His eyes steels to one worthy of the Charlotte name.

"Mama wants to invite both Theia and Theseus to a tea party." 

Katakuri expected fear, or some sort of negative emotion, but instead, Theia's smile slowly quirked up into a sudden smirk, before disappearing quickly. 

A sudden chill went down his spine, triggering his fight or flight instincts, reminding him of the first time they met. 

A reminder that they were predators. 

"I accept." 

(Katakuri didn't notice his own smirk hidden underneath his scarf, and was that excitement or relief?)

Perhaps she is not as tamed as she appears. 

Pie! Let's Meet Again

"Mama mama! Welcome to my tea party!"

Katakuri knew this was not a normal tea party, but it was not his duty to wonder what Mama was planning. With his siblings, he sat beside Mama like a good son he is, and watches the two baker siblings bow in respect. 

"We are honoured to be invited to your tea party Big Mom. We've also brought some of our deserts as our thanks." Theia says, completely out of character, almost graceful and majestic even, as she allows Theseus to serve their desserts on the table. 

As expected, Mama devours their desserts easily and quickly with a satisfied maniac grin on her face. 

Theia and Theseus didn't say anything, in fact, they simply sipped their tea respectfully and patiently on the side.

As if they expected this.

"Mama mama, shall we get down to business?" Big Mom leans forward with the same grin and Thesia challenges with a gentle smile. 

"Oh? What could you mean, Big Mom?" 

"I can't believe you hid so well in my territory! And opened a bakery right under my nose! Did you have any business here?" 

"Of course not. I was simply travelling around."

"Mama mama! Of course, and you haven't changed with your brother since long long ago!"

They knew each other? Since when?

Even the playful music in the background stilled as the two women starred at one another, and Katakuri identified it to be Conqueror's Haki. Although he was in the midst of training, this pressure was pushing down on him. 

Theia tapped the table once while she leaned on her other hand with a sly smile. 

"Why don't we cut the formalities, Linlin? It seems you remembered something important." 

And the table cracks under all the pressure after Mama starts to laugh.

"We finally meet again, the Mother of Eternity!" 

Katakuri immediately shielded his siblings from the shattering cutlery and glassware in front of them. By commanding his siblings to stay back, he stood in front as he watched chaos unfold in front of him. 

The Mother of Eternity is Theia?

Who haven't heard of that title? Then if the Mother of Eternity is here, Theseus must be...

"The Sage of the New World." Katakuri widened his eyes at the revelation.  

This was their true identity?  

Katakuri recalled seeing their wanted posters, but there was never a clear picture of their appearance. In fact, people say the photographer never lived after snapping a photo of them.

But Katakuri has heard rumours about the two. Many of which are just mere speculations, one of them was immortality, and one was that they were inhuman. 

Some say they were immortal monsters from the previous era.

So many emotions burst forth from within, confusion, anger, embarrassment and betrayal. 

Why did she hide? Why did she trick him?

"Well, looks like it's time for us to leave. It was fun, Linlin."

Then Theia looked at Katakuri with a giant smile. Tiny green, gold, and white lights surround the two siblings as giant, majestic silver wings sprouted from her her back. 

"Mama mama! I heard it from my old Captain, but to think you still actually exist!" Mama was beyond content with the free show, as she stared at Theia with desire. 

"Join my family!" 

"You've grown up, Linlin." Theia remarks, before she snaps, and bright light blinded Katakuri's eyes. When the light dims, all it remains is a destroyed room and his angry mother. 

"Find her and her brother! NOW!" 

Without hesitation, Katakuri sprinted out to search for her. 

He was the first to arrive at her bakery, or at least where it used to be, because there was nothing left of it. 

Similarly, all of the employees disappeared like dust. Just like how Theia and Theseus left without a trace, everything related to them also escaped. 

"Her vivre card...is gone! What is going on!?" 

Katakuri ran and ran, looking for a single trace of her on the island. For some reason, he wanted to believe that when she looked at him with such sincerity, she did it with reason. 

So when Katakuri saw a flicker of green light in the distance, he followed and chased without hesitation. Like a mad hound, he rushed after it, before arriving behind of the duo who stood at the edge of the island. 

"Theia!" 

When she turned around, she gave a smile identical to the ones where she would welcome them in to her bakery. 

Katakuri rushed ahead with his trident, but like the first time they met, Theseus easily stops him with his hand, and completely freezing him in place with those strange purple lights. Upon closer look, they were...fairies! 

Katakuri suddenly remembered another rumour. 

Some say, they were from an extinct race.

Some say, they've come for revenge!

But how could this be? Katakuri remembered Mama saying they were extinct 800 years ago during the Void Century!

In the midst of his confusion and desperation, Theia leans forward and speaks beside his ear. 

"It was fun, Charlotte Katakuri." 

Katakuri jumps back and watches as Theia burst into light along with Theseus and they scatter in the air, never to be seen again. 

Were they ever here? Were they simply an illusion? 

All of his doubt vanished upon seeing a fortune cookie rolled to his feet. 

Picking it up and cracking it open, a piece of paper rolled out. 

"Let's meet again, Kata."

[letoilepourpre]

New King AU basics

this is basically an introduction to the New King AU, since you all enjoyed the premise! It has some personal headcanons included, but for now I'll just make the basis settled so you all can accompany whatever I post about it from now on!

Basics:

In this AU, the soul jam doesn't make cookies immortal, just makes them live wayy longer than an average cookie, and the ancients got old. Cacao was the last one to give up on his jam but, eventually, passed it to Caramel Arrow.

The main plot evolves around Caramel, but Raisin, Choco and Royalberry also get soul jams. Still haven't decided on stuff for the Golden Cheese Kingdom though, I'll wait for when ep 18 is out ASKSMMR

This AU has my personal HC where the soul jam changes its holder's physics. I think you already noticed Caramel's horns already but yeah she gets more dragon-like traits and abilities, Raisin gets crow/angel like features (a mix of Vanilla's angelic appearance and her own touch) and Royal's dragon features are more evident (him being a hollytaya child in this AU. They divorced but eventually get back but it's a whooole story that I might explore later). Choco's appearance is never consistent as Dark Enchantress' soul jam is corrupted, but it's always something to do with shadows.

There are some changes in the kingdoms! I might go in depth with it as the AU expands.

Cacao Kingdom:

Cacao gives the throne to Caramel after the Affogato incident happened, as he doesn't believe he's capable of ruling over a kingdom anymore, that he should've passed the soul jam through before all of that and that he knows that the kingdom will be fine in Caramel's hands. (He already didn't feel too confident in the start of the og story I just kinda focused on it 🤷🏽.

Also Cacao didn't randomly tried to kill Choco in the middle of the story he just felt bad for being the reason for his son to have joined the dark side all because of their fight long ago, another reason for him to pass his throne and jam to somebody he trusts.

Affogato didn't manage to run away, instead getting caught by the Beast Tamers and jailed until Caramel was crowned and decided what to do with him. She makes him join the Beast Tamers as punishment (knows he doesn't like getting dirty)

A lot of cookies didn't like that decision but Carrow has Principals™ and wouldn't kill anyone who was defenseless (now that Affogato didn't have followers, weapons or venom or whatever). She acknowledged that at the same time as she still hates his guts.

Vanilla Kingdom:

Pure Vanilla passes his jam to Black Raisin after she saved everyone's asses in the end of ep 12. They rebuilder the kingdom and then she got the jam. Kinda became the leader of the kingdom since she doesn't like a title like "queen", feels too abundant and she doesn't like it.

Umm nothing changes much rlly. Everything's fine until the odyssey stuff happens (I'm still getting into it)

Hollyberry Kingdom:

Hollyberry being gone was the last straw for Pitaya, who took the kingdom for themself to try and get her attention (misses their wife). A princess contest was made to settle the next heir after Royalberry just to be sure, as the soul jam was kept a secret from Pitaya so they didn't use it to get Holly's attention too. For that, Royal didn't have the power (or courage) to confront Pitaya using it, and even ordered the royal guards to not mess with Pitaya, even Wildberry (look at what divorce leads to /silly).

Like in the story, Princess invades the context and wins it, giving Royal courage to use the shield with the soul jam and fight confront Pitaya with Princess in the only way Pitaya would listen: in a fight. Hollyberry eventually joins in too, her role is very similar to the one she has in the og story, except she was thereby get the soul jam back but decides to let Royal stay with it.

Cookies of Darkness:

Choco got White Lily's/Dark Enchantress' soul jam as he's the most powerful (combat-wise) of the cookies of darkness. Even if upset about not being chosen to be its holder, Pomegranate stills obeys her master and keeps controlling Choco with his blade (now powered by the soul jam) to get to her goals.

After ep 14 Choco doesn't give up on the sword, as Pomegranate stops him before he does. He still thinks about running away for a while though, but since Pomegranate has even more power over him because of both the cursed sword and the corrupted soul jam he still has to find out how to make his body stable without Pomegranate's help.

He eventually does, taking the soul jam and Poison Mushroom with him. He still struggles with how corrupted his body became, but finally the voices are gone and he can focus on himself. He only took Poison Mushroom because he felt bad leaving a child behind (and mayyybe he got attached. They reminded him a liiittle bit of Caramel from when he first started training her)