#doesnt act like a frat boy

[vampirekilmerfic]

Captain John "Full Grown Adult Man" Price™

[a-hazbin-reader]

OK SO WHAT ABOUT ALASTOR X FEM READER EXCEPT READER DOESNT KNOW HOW TO REACT TO HIS CHIVALRY

So this takes place before they start dating and the beginning of the relationship. Reader basically has never met a guy who has chivalry(or is respectful) like ALASTOR, so when Alastor’s mannerisms come out, reader just looks at him like “wtf are you doing?” BUT NOT IN A MEAN WAY, more like in a confused way because they’re from a time where chivalry isn’t as popular(especially to women in general) and reader was raised to be tough(but it’s still nice to get treated like a lady). So whenever alastor acts like that reader just gets awkward and shy.

IM ASKING FOR THIS CUZ LIKE THE GUYS NOW HAVE NO RESPECT OR CHIVALRY like alastor😔😒 (ik not ALL guys but most guys now and days are jackasses)

Hnnng I fucking love this ✨️

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Harassment, Men being nasty

Description: ☝️⬆️

Back when you were alive, men never did the sort of things that Alastor does unless they wanted to get laid

Most of the men you knew had tendencies to act like frat boys or old perverts

Only having one goal in mind and if they got rejected then they got fucking nasty as hell with you

On top of that, you didn't have the luxury of growing up to be soft and helpless like some people

You had to be strong and look out for yourself, you rarely looked to others for help

Not even your own family

Some people didn't even look at you as a woman, just as some tough badass who didn't need anyone's helping hand

At least you hoped that how they looked at you

Not that you would've rejected the offer if anyone actually tried to help you out, everyone needs a hand now and then

The only people who ever offered any sort of help were horny guys who offered to help you let off some steam with them

Fuck off

But Alastor grew up in a very different time than you and his way of treating you always gave you whiplash

He would never dream of asking you to fuck within the first few days of knowing each other, or even the first month wtf kind of animals have men turned into??

You don't even wanna know, Alastor

His little pet names alone made you flustered but his actions??? A whole other monster in itself

When you first met him this crazy guy kissed your hand like you were in some regency movie

You were so shy afterwards that you couldn't look him in the eyes, your cheeks hot and pink

One time, Alastor actually took off his coat and put it over a puddle for you step on

Didn't you just beat up some guy for ripping it???

You could've just stepped over the puddle in the first place??? Why did you do that??

"I did what any proper gentleman would do for a lady such as yourself, Y/N..!"

You gotta look away at that point or else he would see how hot your face is getting, feeling flustered

Alastor actually asked you to dance to a song that wasn't meant for grinding and sweating on each other??

You blush and mumble something about not knowing how to dance to music like this and instead of making fun of you Alastor teaches you how

He's a wonderful dancer and leads the entire time, not letting you make a fool of yourself in front of everyone

You've never felt your heart do skip so many beats before

You're trying to ignore what some random lecherous demon is saying about your body and the things he would do to it??

Guess what-

"Now that is not the way to start a proper conversation with a lady of Y/N's status, or any lady for that matter."

Alastor scares him off for you and won't even accept your thanks in return, making your legs wobbly

Once your suffering with feelings for Alastor then every little thing he does makes you turn into a gooey puddle

It doesn't stop when he's suddenly courting you, only getting worse with each romantic act

He brings you flowers, dedicates entire broadcasts to you, asks you to take evening strolls with him

He does all this and never even expects a parting kiss from you, simply happy to be in your presence

When/why the fuck did men stop acting like this?? This is so much better than how they were back when you were alive-

You get flustered just at the sight of him now, wondering just how he's going to make you swoon today

Alastor is slowly getting you accustomed to how he believes you should always be treated, happy that you're no longer confused by his actions

This motherfucker just Pavlov-ed you into falling for him

This was so fun to write!! I hope I did a good enough job!!

[zweiginator]

subby fratboy!art we love to see it

he will act all alpha at parties and everyone expects it of him as a student athlete--but at the end of the day he wants to be held by you, used by you. he wants you to ride him and hold his wrists down and slap him across the face. he wants to cum--but he doesnt want you to make it easy for him.

you laugh when you see him talking with his friends. maybe to everyone else he looks like your typical frat boy. to you, he looks like the runt of the litter, just trying to fit in.

[lo-shouldve-been-an-email]

Why hello there.

Listen,I don’t have much to say about the newest LO episode so here’s an ares ranking to go along with the other ones.

Spoilers.

Percy Jackson:

6/10

Look,Ares is a really weird figure when it comes to how the media presents him.

Almost always they present him as this sexist frat boy when in mythology he is:

A reported protector of mistreated woman.

The patron god of the amazons and was worshipped to the point that their leader had 2 babies with him.

Scored the GODDESS PF LOVE AND BEAUTY and there is no way you cannot convince me she doesn’t have some pretty high standards(even though apparently you can convince most of the writers on this list)

And as much as I love Percy Jackson,it is not devoid of crimes.

In the first book,he helps Luke/Kronos steal Zeus’ master bolt and Hades’ helm of invisibility as to start a civil war within the gods.id say this is a pretty good portrayal overall.

…until we get to the second book.

This myth will be very important so long story short:a daughter of ares got r*** by a son of Poseidon so Ares,like any reasonable and bloodthirsty god of war,fucking killed him.

After this,he got put on trial for murder as if he wasn’t the literal god of bloody war,and all the ladies vouched for him so he got set free.

Let’s just say,Rick Riordan didn’t know of this myth.

In the second book,there’s a scene where Clarisse La Rue,a DAUGHTER of ares talks to him through a magic mirror.

There,he threatens her and says he should have sent one of his sons on the quest.and keep in mind she is his FAVORITE DAUGHTER.

So yeah.

I don’t really like this portrayal but he gets points for bringing Clarisse and (technically)Frank into this world since I like them both.also the fact that Percy could tell he had beef with him even without having any other memory.

Lore Olympus:

1/10

FUCK THIS GUY

Remember when I said that modern Ares was more often than not a sexist frat boy?we’ll add “predator” and “Reddit nice guy” to that list because RS can’t write.

If in Percy Jackson Aphrodite had terrible standards here said standards are so much worse.

He spends MONTHS trying to seduce a 19-YEAR-OLD and then tries to marry her without her consent.

Also,sir,YOU HAVE THE GODDESS OF LOVE AND BEAUTY FULLY AT YOUR DISPOSAL AND YOURE PICKING A GURL WHO DOESNT EVEN KNOW HIW TO USE A COMPUTER????

Great.this guy is a predator,Reddit nice guy,AND stupid.

I remember saying that the only character who could get a lowers rating than LO Persephone being LO hades and then I remembered this fuck existed.

Fuck him.

Hades:

10/10

Your know when you see something and then immediately want to wash your eyes with soap?this is my soap.

He is my third favorite Olympian in the game,coming third to Hermes and Artemis.

So here’s a few reasons why I like him:

Doom anything with impending doom and the increasing doom damage boon does absurd amounts of damage.

Curse of nausea is one of the best duos in the game.

He respects woman.(oh look they finally Aphrodite standards)

His quest is stupidly easy and he was the first Olympian who’s bond I maxed out.

I know this joke has been made so many times but.he really is a Chthonic simp.

He doesn’t get too pissed if you don’t pick him is trial of gods.hes just here for the bloodshed.

It may be just the fact that almost every other interpretation of ares is bad,but I really like him.

Also Aphrodite wearing his face paint in hades 2-

OSP:

7/10

He’s cool.

I really don’t have much else to add except the helmet stays on during sex.

Gods school:

5/10

Welp Back to the incels-

Him straight up telling Aphrodite that he can do whatever he wants because she won’t leave is just.why.

I don’t get why people go to this myth,turn it around,and act as if they’ve done a service by making Ares miserable when in the myths it was already a good ending.

What is with the obsession with making ares a toxic ex boyfriend when in the myths him and ‘dite were literally love and war.

Another issue I have with gods school is the fact they made Aphrodite a Karen Smith when in the myths shes a Regina George but that’s a problem for the Aphrodite ranking.

Also I just realized the Aphrodite Hephaestus ares myth is the og “I fell in love with a bad boy story”-

Epic:the musical:

8/10

I don’t have a physical picture of him but I already like him.

The only time he he appears is during a bit of an unfinished song but he does bring up some pretty good points,like the Scylla thing.

Also the fact Athena didn’t directly refute any of his points but instead persuaded him with the fact that the moment Ody gets home the suitors are going to be fucked is surprisingly great.

Also can I just say how absolutely hyped I am for god games?Aphrodite’s part fucking rocks and I’m excited for Apollo and Hephaestus.

Also here’s my ranking for epic Hermes since I wasn’t part of the fandom back then:

10/10

*insert dolphin laugh here*

[bubblegyu00]

ZB1 LEGAL LINE AS FRAT BOYS

a/n : i lost the ask 💔

tw : mentions of drinking, drugs, sex (?), suggestive content, cussing, nsfw

mdni !!

• jiwoong

- the biggest asshole out of them i don't care fight me 💔

- will obsses over you at basically stalker level until you sleep with him cus he's delusional

- but the minute he gets you in bed he'll act like he doesn't even know your name — or he genuinely forgets a day later

- he probably doesn't remember half of the times he's ever fucked anyone cus it's not a big deal to him he was just horny

- has multiple girls thinking " guys i slept with jiwoong last night i think we might get together!! " but he's doesn't even remember what you look like 🙁

• hanbin

- a literal girl magnet

- like he could just sit there drinking and he'd get like three girls numbers in the span of an hour

- has a girlfriend for everyday of the week ( @lunicho is friday 😛 )

- he just has this certain charm to him that all the girls want a piece of him

- he's not as outgoing as the others, but he gets a good fraction of the girls

• zhanghao

- born to be valedictorian forced ( by ricky ) to be a man whore 🙁🙁

- no but frl i don't think he knows how insanely attractive and alluring he is — which is hard cus he lit has one girl on his lap, one girl under each arm, and like six other girls in the room wanting to talk to him ??

- but zhanghao is also rlly wanted because he is a man of mystery

- once you get into his pants ( which is a rlly hard thing to do — you go girl ) he's never speaking to you again

- like the minute he cums, he won't even look at you. like he'll literally go make a sandwich or something ??

- but out of all the ( 7 ) girls he's slept with, they say he's they best they've ever had. so now EVERYONE needs to experience zhanghao

• matthew

- DONT FALL FOR HIS TRICKS ‼️‼️‼️‼️

- has fucked the most girls.

- he likes to trick people with his sweet and caring demeanor, but really just wants his dick sucked 😛

- i feel like he'd be the only one to actually take you out on a date before he fucks you and then ghosts you 🥰 ( my standards are low..... )

- he's the most heartbreaking one cus he actually seems like such boyfriend materiel before he leaves you on read until he wants head again 💔

- but the girls always come back because he's literally in watch mojo for top 3 pussy eaters in the world

• taerae

- HE DOESNT GHOST YOU AFTER YOU FUCK 🎉🎉🎉🎉

- oh but he does fuck like twenty other girls while he's " dating " you

- he dates bunches of girls at the same time and they're all aware, but at least they're one of kim taerae's girlfriends ⁉️

- will take you on really good, perfect dates, but he's doing it to nineteen other people so it's not special 💔

- basically rotates girlfriends every two months, so that's sixty girls he's dating per year... you go rae 🥰

- his schedule is honestly so serious for him so the minute the two month mark hits you're cut off.

- but he's a good guy besides all that 🤗

• ricky

- is basically the leader of the fraternity like idk 🗣️🗣️

- the longest he's gone without taking a girl home is like.... three days ( i was last tuesday 🥰 )

- has fucked like every girl on campus like it's not even an exaggeration at this point

- kind of an asshole but it's okay i love when they're hot and toxic 🥰 ( can you tell i have relationship trauma )

- SUCH AN ASSHOLE WAIT CUS NOW IM THINKING..... he'd like flex his rolex while taking a picture on his family owned yacht that his rich ceo mom bought for him while wearing gucci....

- he's honestly such a smooth talker?? like he could def get you to sleep with him in under ten minutes of speaking, that's how good he is

- professional frat boy 😛

• gyuvin

- he's actually insane

- like he's going around snorting cocaine from girls' tits kind of insane

- he's the person everyone is chanting " CHUG! " for like ??

- LIFE OF THE PARTYYY

- if you show him any signs that you want to fuck he'll pull you into the nearest closet cus he'll buss it down anywhere

- NO BUT THE THING IS, HES SUCH A GOOD STUDENT NO ONE EVEN TRIES TO REPORT HIM FOR DOING DRUGS CUS THE TEACHERS WONT BELIEVE IT

- he's honestly the nicest cus he's actually such a fun guy to have around

[izufeels]

this is such a cute lil game 🥹

atsumu miya (and if I can do two can I also get suna rina pls if i can't do two then just miya is fine hehe)

1. what's their beach days routine (what do they bring, do they apply sun screen? any specific stuff you think they'd do/bring on beach day?)

2. silver, gold, or no jewelry?

3. what do you think they smell like (cologne)?

4. how would they react to a classmate being overly flirty? 👀

ATSUMU

1. the only thing he brings is twisted teas. that was a half joke, but he probably only brings like an almost empty thing of sunscreen and a volleyball

2. he doesnt often wear jewelry, but for volleyball pictures and school pictures he wears a thin gold chain (which is sooooo frat boy of him and i love it)

3. for a VEEERRRRRYYYY long time (im talking like 5th grade to 2nd year) he wore strictly axe body spray. and then he tried flirting with this girl and she shut him down using his cologne as an insult, so he started wearing stupidly expensive colognes. type of dude to have a cologne COLLECTION

4. he wants everyone to think hes some super badass, flirty womanizer, but really hes a total geek. he’ll flirt with ANYTHING but the moment u flirt back hes PERPLEXED. especially if u were super forward. blushing virgin.

SUNARIN

1. doesnt bring anything to the beach. if he goes with his family, he relies on his mom to bring sunscreen. if he goes with the team, he relies on kita (and he always comes through dw). and if he gets the wooorrrrssst sunburn he act like he doesnt gaf (he does and it hurts really bad atsumu pls stop slapping him on the back)

2. never wears jewelry, but if he did it would be silver

3. there’s this cologne called american spirit and i think it would fit him very well. one of those guys who ALLLWAYS smells good

4. listen guys. he wants to be super mysterious and like super nonchalant but if ur super flirty with him- he has no idea what to do. like obviously hes had a girlfriend or two, but neither of them were ever forward like u. so he just brushes it off and tries to return the energy (he fails bc he doesnt know what to say) and the twins def make fun of him

atsumu pictured here

suna down below

^ read the alt text pls!

[multidimensional-trashcan]

hamlet but i haven't seen it (yet)

there's this guy named hamlet who's the prince of denmark

somethings foul in the state of denmark or something

hamlet's dad, the king, got killed before the play and hamlet suspects his uncle claudius (is that his name?)

claudius marries hamlet's mother and is now king (bit weird but okay)

hamlet doesnt like that

the ghost of hamlet's father appears to hamlet and tells him to kill his uncle in revenge

hamlet the master of indecisiveness™

to be or not to be

thats like about whether to act or not i think

hamlet is a college student so actually quite young (i think boy started to go to college at age 14 and hamlets probably around 16 but nobody's sure)

a phrase stuck in my brain is "hamlet the frat boy" but im pretty sure he's more of a theater kid

instead of killing his uncle hamlet stages a play similar to what he thinks transpired to watch how his uncle reacts to it

the lady doth protest too much, methinks

shakepeare does love to make his protagonists spiral into insanity

i heard hamlet is a story about grief and i also heard that it's like a mirror, what you see about hamlet says more about you that hamlet himself (but dont ask me to elaborate i am realising my brain retains information i have no clue how i got)

in the end almost everyone dies because of hamlet

hamlet stabs someone through the curtain i think its the father of ophelia (polonius or smth i dunno) cause he thinks is his uncle

im not sure why his uncle should be behind a curtain tho

hamlet randomly gets kidnapped by pirates but we never see it because shakespeare already new how expensive special effects are

i bet the pirates let hamlet go because he's a little bitch

hamlet is A LITTLE BITCH

i think in one scene he just tries to fluster ophelia (his not-quite-girlfriend) by turning everything she says into sexual innuendo (may i lay my head in your lap so on so on)

there's one scene with a grave digger whom hamlet asks for whom the grave is the man is digging and the man responds it is his own to which hamlet answers something along the lines of

one would thinks so for thou dost lie in it

great pun

ophelia actually manages to drown in a brook which is characterised by it's shallowness

its unclear whether she did it intentionally

there are some guys named rosencrantz und guildenstern (probably didnt spell that right) and i know nothing about them except that they die because of hamlet and for some reason they always get mentioned together which makes me think they are an item

many people die because of hamlet

also there's a skull

is that yorrick?

hamlet talks to it

david tennant got the role of hamlet because he randomly picked up a real human skull

hamlet dies (big surprise!)

there's a duel? and one of the sword's is poisoned and hamlet picks up the wrong one? is that with laertes? i know he dies, too

also there's horatio, everybody seems to like him so i tried to not mention him for as long as possible to annoy them (not really i just dont know much about him)

people think hes gay for hamlet

hes not nobility but wellspoken

something something sweet prince?

horatio does not die

he lives to tell the tale

which is somehow worse

while i know (claudius?) hamlet's uncle dies and thats kinda the point of hamlet's whole actions i do not actually know when or how he dies (but i know about the curtain stabbing, the brook and the duel, weird)

or is he the one in the duel?

i bet hamlet's mother dies too

i also dont know how hamlet dies, something with the duel and the poisoned sword i guess, i know he picked up the wrong sword but im not sure if the wrong one was that with poison or not

WHAT DOES THE PIRATE KIDNAPPING HAVE TO DO WITH EVERYTHING?

AND WAS HE REALLY SIXTEEN?

i am very confused about how much there is in my brain about the guy

i do think there must be more to horatio except 'gay for hamlet' but i dont know anything

rosencrantz und guildenstern sound like a comic relief duo who dont know what they're doing

something about mother and knowing about playing with her drapes... (is that from hamlet?)

im sure this is enough for now

please do tell me how wrong i am

also tell me if you know why i seem to know so much about this (even if it's not true)

yes, this was inspired by @weirdly-specific-but-ok 's good omens post and @hello-ello-ello 's post about macbeth

[loverseon]

sunset city ★ ksw . syj

synopsis as deobi university’s one and only it girl, you really should be used to be breaking hearts everywhere you step — you cant help it after all! but having to pick between your best friend and the boy you fell for at first sight is not really something you expected to be on your bingo card this year.

⭑.ᐟ masterlist next

i. profiles — yn & co ᯓᡣ𐭩

ln yn | 22 ☆ fashion major

the heart of deobi university! miss it girl, prettiest, most popular, darling sweetheart etc. girl who gives no fucks but also fucks around like crazy oops… flirting is soooo fun for her but she underestimates the level these random boys will go to try and keep her attention. is so into eric but doesnt have the balls to tell him

eric sohn | 22 ☆ photography and journalism major

yn’s other half and the lead guitar / frontman of university band Sunset City. friends with yn but not that close with her friends - his best friends are the other sunset city boys…. is also very into yn but his hints are always unnoticed

jake sim | 22 ☆ fine arts major

part time model + yn’s on-off fwb relationship. met yn in freshman year of college when she was looking for a model for one of her assignments and he volunteered simply bc she was pretty LMAO buttttt they’re super close friends now even though there’s a little bit of unspoken animosity between him and eric……

park gunwook | 21 ☆ modern dance major

yns childhood best friend who’s a year younger than the rest of them. is so sweet and loving all the time but also loves girls. like LOVES girls. is in a frat and uses it every chance he gets to charm a girl. was yns first kiss but they both thought it was super fucking weird and swore to never do it again

karina yoo | 22 ☆ classical dance major

deobi univ’s resident rich girl! one of yns only girlfriends bc majority of the girls she has been friends with have used her to get to eric or jake. super cold aura but in reality shes one of the sweetest girls ever: always wants to take yn out on little coffee dates and spoils her friends with gifts

choi chanhee | 22 ☆ fashion and photography major

owner of the up-and-coming fashion brand Angel Club. constantly acts as though his friends are annoying but he secretly loves them all to pieces. however he does think that yn should stop flirting with every boy she sees bc the trail of men shes leaving in her wake is rly inconvenient for his business

a/n here are yn and her group of friends!!!!!! sunwoo and his losers will be coming next and then we can start the smau :D this is my first smau so feedback is always appreciated ❤︎ until then ><

[enthyrea]

hi storm hope you're well :0 here's your reminder to drink water and eat something if you haven't already!!!

can I ask about your fav macheresin headcanons??

HI CY i love you! i just had lunch <3 hope you are hydrated and well!

i have soooo many headcanons for these two idiots. its actually insane. these are disorganized sorry

my personal fav rn is like. they are so telepathically connected that even pre-relationship, if one of them is getting hit on at a bar, the other just magically appears behind them like "is this guy bothering you, baby?" and they both fall into that fake-fiancee shtick SOOO fast. they do it constantly to the point where some people actually think they are engaged.

they would have a marriage pact like "if we arent married by 30 we have to get engaged" and they're serious about it but in a bro way. then jake turns 30, they get engaged for real because ofc and then feelings start to show? after the GLOC incident jake claims to be javy's husband to get past hospital staff to see him, and the daggers are like "YALL ARE MARRIED??" and then it just devolves from there and they realize oh. yeah we actually do like each other (i have a whole riff about this that i've been thinking of writing lol)

jake's love language as acts of service <3 he memorizes the recipe for javy's favorite gumbo and makes it for his birthday/whenever javy's feeling particularly homesick !!

ALSO. i think they're very "practically married but oblivious" like they 'save money' by living together (its totally not because they feel so much more comfortable staying with the other) saving on heating bills by cuddling. platonically. of course. like literally

bob: one time i ran into them while they were at the flower gardens on valentines day. they told me it wasnt a date and they just wanted to take advantage of the free couple's package reuben: oh so they're hopeless

its to the point where their respective families actually think they're together. two of jake's sisters think he's already married to javy. javy's dad is convinced they're just long term pranking him. considering javy brings jake home for thanksgiving every year without fail, his dad is about to strangle him if he doesnt confess and or get married to this white boy TOMORROW

basically i think they're very stupid but i am obsessed with them and their frat boy energy.

(also related but post-getting together: when javy gets drunk he just starts blabbering about jake to anyone who will listen (no one wants to listen) meanwhile drunk jake is just falling over himself tryna kiss javy while javy's like "down boy! no! not in public!" (he is weak and will eventually give up and let jake smother him in kisses))

[oursidae]

IF YOU INSIST

takes your hands. come on this journey with me. for reference i consider kiryu to be exclusively gay but i feel like a lot of this except one bit also applies when reading him through a bisexual lens also <3 come listen to me talk about the way kiryu touches himself and how it changes throughout his life <3

i think when he was in his 20s he was a hedonist, far less so than nishiki but still, basically a frat boy, a horny 20 yr old. i dont imagine him having any actual sex partners during this time, in fact i think he's a virgin well into his middle age at Least. so he jacked off a lot. usually into his fist. i can see him making a fleshlight with 2 wet sponges and a cup. sometimes he got brave and touched his ass but felt so ashamed of it the days after he would be jumpy around nishiki and any other yakuza. (real yakuza cant like men...camera zooms in on kashiwagi) tldr hes so closeted and has so much internal homophobia it leeches into how he pleasures himself and knowing he might like sex in "unorthodox" ways is frightening in ways he doesnt super understand. ofc over the events of 0 he has bigger things to worry about but 0 is when i think kiryu's attraction to men comes to the forefront, through tachibana. (and also pocket circuit fighter.)

then, he goes to jail for 10 years. i think this period severely stunts him, because we know kiryu loves to just compartmentalize and shove all of the scary feelings down so he can just keep ignoring them, and being an invisible inmate makes that so much easier. any self pleasure he does during and immediately after this time is quick, utilitarian. dry and chafing just getting it over with, you know? any emotion attached to the act is a distant staticky buzz in the back of his mind.

of course im a kazumaji truther so during yakuza 1/kiwami, majima introduces to him a new level of sexual frustration that leads to him exploring pain and masochism by himself. majima doesnt *give* him this fetish, so much as he just opened the locked door to it. he digs his fingers into the cuts and bruises majima leaves on him and turns the shower water up until its scalding because if he didnt do this in the shower he'd pass out after with dried cum on himself. i think his feelings toward majima during this time are frightening spaghetti to him - something im sure irritates majima to no end, majima in my mind is far more assured of himself and who he is and his own sexuality and attraction to other men - and i dont think that kiryu does much in the way of exploration around this time aside from the odd burst of confidence (we were robbed by the banana bar substory.) he might try to touch his ass again here and there but theres still that twist of shame that he cant quite shake. i dont know when exactly i hc him entering a relationship with majima, if at All (i love the angst), but if he is having sex with majima at this time i think that relationship kicks his Growth into overdrive and he overcomes those hurdles a lot easier.

shame, i think, holds kiryu back a lot, because if he is this way, he isnt what is expected of him. if that makes sense. kiryu is supposed to shoulder it all alone and keep the tojo clan from sinking and there isnt room in that power fantasy for taking it up the ass and finding comfort in another mans arms, because this series is rife with toxic masculinity and commentary on it here and there.

on theme with burying his feelings and how peoples expectations of him affect him, kiryu in 2/kiwami 2 is DEEPLY SUICIDAL. like the whole game. if you havent noticed. kiwami 2 is one of my least favorite games of the series so this may color my judgment here a little. i think both kiryu and kaoru were experiencing comphet as their relationship progressed, especially the weird makeout next to her brothers corpse. you do weird things under stress, adrenaline, and trauma, and thats what i chalk this part of the game up to. i dont see him engaging in much, if any, self loving around this time period because of his severe depression, ptsd, and deep desire to end it all. if he does its in the "i might as well" way, or just to make time pass. he might even engage in it in a compulsory way, because he knows he'll feel a little better by the end bc orgasming does that, but its literally just for that purpose, not to Feel Good in a sexual way. just to hurry up and crank one out in the shower so he can get it together enough to get haruka to school.

kiryu has growing to do when he starts raising children and does his best to let go of any predjudices he has, but i think he still struggles with his own attraction to men. he never ever would teach his kids anything but to be kind, even if they find something odd. but he cant afford that kindness to himself. when i was in elementary school, i came home one day and told my mom "today i learned from my friend that gay is when boys like boys and that lesbian is when girls like girls :)" and then...that was that. she was like. "ah. okay... who said that to you? i see. did he say anything else about it?" and she didnt really push me to one conclusion about those facts. thats kind of how i see kiryu navigating some of these conversations. he'd steer them toward the kind option, if they needed it, but sometimes "yeah thats right. gay men are men who like men. lesbians are women who like women." is all you need, the confirmation that its real, and the neutrality that means yeah its fine.

and i think haruka is the most perceptive of kiryu bc of how they have grown together so like She Knows. if anyone puts the pieces together besides majima itd have to be her. and i think the conversation they one day (probably not around 3-era, unsure where i'd place this) have kind of also touches on harukas own bisexuality bc nothing abt what she did w that one girl she was friends with in 5 was hetero. 2 me. i wish I could be more coherent about this scene in my head, but i feel like its a conversation where a lot remains unsaid but is innately understood. they dance around the topic because saying it outright teeters on too much, but they know what theyre talking about. the love between them is unconditional.

anyway he doesnt have much time to masturbate when running the orphanage, but because he's busy with chores and taking care of a bunch of kids who he loves. plus thin walls. but hes gentler with himself when he does. maybe he starts foraying into men strictly in pornography, he's got magazines under the futon or looks up crusty jpegs on his phone or something. he lets go of some of the shame because he's found somewhere else where it feels right for him to be. he is so happy in okinawa it drives me crazy.

skipping over 4 bc he's still in okinawa for the majority of that game until saejima and company wash up on his beach and then he has to go back to kamurocho, during the events of 5 he is NOT touching himself. he hates himself so much in that game. he hardly showers. he lives with a woman and covers up her naked body when she strips in front of him. his boss is pointing out how gay everyone at his job thinks he is but insisting its okay but being clocked like that is a super specific punch to the gut that he wasnt really prepared for and really flusters him. for the most part i dont think his dick exists to him. he's sitting to pee. he hasnt gotten it up in months.

i blocked 6 from my memory for the most part except how kiryu in a baseball uniform makes my dick hard. haruka and yuta i think r bi4bis my girl deserves it.

post 6, he is not Kiryu Kazuma anymore, and despite the pain that comes from forced separation from his family, being a different person is so freeing. he gets to explore things. he gets to let his shoulders drop and relax for the first time since 2005. im playing thru gaiden right now and already dont remember all of the daidoji restrictions on him but by now he's pretty much fully realized himself and embraced his sexuality. he lets himself have his fantasies. he's become a bit of a hedonist like he was in his 20s with far more easy access to gay porn and sex toys. i know my man has a butt plug in his gay ass!!! i love bottom kiryu. have i ever said how much i love bottom kiryu. i think he has nights where he puts on a porn video and treats himself. i think he has some drinks and a cigarette and fingers himself and plays with his balls and teases himself until his orgasm sneaks up on him. and then he takes a shower and goes to sleep in his underwear. is he completely healthy? absolutely not. his self sacrificial streak and need to bear all of the pain by himself is why he's here. he still has unaddressed severe trauma and depression. but he can fingerfuck himself and watch gay porn without his stomach churning over the fact that he actually wants this, so progress is progress.

i need to stress. i started thinking about all this. because i put kiryu in this outfit

and thought about him putting on dark plum colored lipstick and looking at himself in the mirror and smudging it a little and getting so hard that he gets lightheaded and immediately needing to jack off about it. i would say im going to write that fic but i know i wont.

[rigginsstreet]

(inspired by the boy draft + boy toy auction in one tree hill)

college au where billy and steves frat and heathers sorority hold this fantasy draft/auction every year where a girl from the sorority picks a guy to claim as "hers" the rest of the year, goes to the highest bidder (the money goes towards activities and fixing up the houses and other random shit) and its just this fun little way to like hook up or find a partner or a friend even etc.

except billy and steve have been dating previously but get into a huge fight that was definitely steves fault somehow and has left billy pissed and upset. wont talk to steve. its a whole thing

and its basically gone without saying that heather was going to bid on billy because theyre besties and billys not interested in being with other girls so that was the easy solution. except with everything going on, steves devised a plan to buy billy at the auction, which is totally against the rules but he doesnt really care. hes got enough money that hes sure itll be overlooked for his donation

steve tells heather hes gonna outbid her and heather of course goes straight to billy with this news to see what he wants to do. and honestly at first billys like fuck that im not going with him so heathers like cool i'll win you and thatll be that. but then billy starts figuring well.... if steve puts up enough of a fight and acts like he really does care about billy then maybe thatll prove that he loves him.

so its basically steve and heather fighting to outbid each other to win billy and once steve lays down some line about how it doesnt matter if heather wins, hes not giving up on their relationship billy means too much to him, heather decides maybe steve is worthy of her best friend after all (thats a stretch. but he IS trying. so.... she cant totally fault him) and she backs down and lets steve win. and then he and billy go out on a date and rekindle their love. steve does much groveling. heathers still got her eye on him but all he seems fine for now and billys happy and thats what matters

[saeithoshiswife]

How haikyu boys would act today

~If haikyu boys were highschoolers today how would they act? This i purely based on my opion ofc and if your guys like this please send me more charcters.~

Includes- Atsumu, bokuto, kurro, kenma,

Bokuto-

Says gyatt on the regular to random girls (Borderline sexual harrasment) or uses it in everyday language like "Ive gyatt to get to class guys"

Definitely used to naruto run in middle school to all of his classes

so annoying in class and when the teacher says something hell immdentaily throw his hands up and say he didnt even do anything. He might even ask the quiet girl in the corner if he did anything and when she doesnt respond he responds for her like "She agrees with me you just cant hear her"

used to say sheesh along with the lip biting and pose

"im not like other guys ive seen the notebook" when it was probably akkashi who was watching it and bokuto came in the room for 0.2 seconds

I think him and kuroos jokes would be either racist, homophobic, sexiest or all

used to wear the iconic black savage shirt with the red border around the font

he makes so much fun of the girls he likes

Atsumu-

one of those rich boys with the moms that are inlove with them and think he cant do any wrong especially to women

big slur user especially to your face. if he doesnt like you hell say them or hell just say them like its no big deal

owns a speed boat that he illegal drives and host partys on. hell post on his snap story being like 'this party is such bruh p/u'

cries to his mom

punches walls

used to dress and act like josh richards and noah beck in 2021

a literal women hater like os much its hard to belive hes not guy but hes always objectifying them so hes not

used to moan in middle school thinking it was funny

duck lips with the peace sign all the time and hes being completley serious

in a frat when hes in college

peaked in highschool

Kenma-

when speaking to a women hell ask her what her favortie game/anime is and then ask her to name 3 charchters and when she does he will immdeantiley discredit those charcters. Also he will call the anime she chose super popular so theirs no way shes an actual fan

smells like shit an stays up all night so there bags under his eyes. his hair is so greasy you could cook with it

"erm actually- goku solos every single anime verse"

call people racial slurs on the games only

follows that chicki guy who dances everyday until he gets a girlfriend

victim of the 2020 bleach phase

most horrible genshin impact player he mains mona, Rosiaria, bediou, itto and bought all the the outfits that came with them.

has a hatsume miku body pillow

since he doesnt shower he will just coat himself in axe body spray

grows out of everything and peaks right after college

Kuroo-

i honestly had no idea what to say about this man so i tried my best i belive this man is a sexy angel from the bottom of my heart so i had to truly think

used to stink like kenma but grew out of it in middle school

when he gets rejected he'll post 'nice guys always finish last'

acts dumb but is really smart

calls double dates 2 mans

wear his hat backwards with the sides of his hair sticking from under

white airforce energy

slept with everyone but somehow hes not slut shamed

with call girls whores when his body count is double theirs

doesnt believe in womens rights but also doesnt want to become a man so hes just insecure

in volleyball he will try to spike as hard as he can and purposefully hit someone in the face

became a nice respectable man because i believe his mother doesnt play like that and taught him a lesson at his old age for repecting women

secretly a munch and whorships his girlfriend acting like a baby in private and then an asshole in pubic

"this ones for you babe" the it goes out giving you the ick

poses in the gym mirror for his snap streaks

used to follow andrew tate and all those man quotes before his mom told him to cut it out

[hrodvitnon]

Assorted Abraxasverse Headcanons

- Ladon probably did not get along with Shin or Leo initially. Both because it’s really difficult for him to trust now given his circumstances but also becausd of their fundamentally different viewpoints and philosophies - Ladon doesnt like humans at all but tolerates them because Mom and Dad do (he gets better about this over time, but not all of that resentment goes away), Shin wants nothing to do with humans and would rather them stay far away, and Leo is the classical Shonen Hero who believes the best in everyone. So naturally, conflict will arise at some point.

Shockingly though, Leo was always the mediator and kept his brothers from going too far, and eventually after plenty of scuffles (and the ouccasional scolding), thry mostly chill out. Ladon is still a ball of surpressed rage though.

- Mothra is the only being outside of Ladon (and eventually Leo) Megalon respects - both because of them being Gods but also because even though they embody two opposite concepts - War and Life - they both love sharing their views and philosophies in spirited debate whenever they meet, with Mothra finding it a bit sad that Megalon still thinks so little of surface dwellers. That, and Megalon is deeply pleased by her hidden bloodlust. 

- You’d think Manda is entirely cool and calm just based on being raised by Abraxas and the way he carries himself most of the time would sell it, but it must also be kept in mind that his father is Rodan. So Manda is just as prone to coming up with stupid or reckless stunts as his dad or being somewhat of an airhead. Keeta is better than their brother, but that’s because he’s the type who prefers to come along and watch rather than directly participate. Biollante!Maddie actually finds Manda at his goofiest endearing, which only reinforces his Rodanisms.

- King Caesar exists somewhere, with his usual backstory of being the ancient protector deity of the royal family of Okinawa. Thing is, nobody but the descendants of that line know where he is and it’s unknown if the Mass Awakening changed that. People have reported a strange dog-shaped Titan appearing to take down hostile monsters then vanishing as quickly as it came, but nothing concrete has come up. Monarch suspects there’s some unknown channel in the Hollow Earth he’s using to move between place to place extremely quickly.

- No one knows what the fuck Hedorah is. All that the Fleet knows is that it used to show up and feast on the dying remnants of civilizations Ghidorah had ravaged, making them suspect it’s some manner of parasitic scavenger. 

- Gigan Rex and the Gigan Miles from GvGR were possibly either an unrelated group of planet conquerors that were suspiciously similar to Gigan himself or they were other models of Gigan that had somehow survived, just without becoming the sort of horrific techno-flesh deity and cult that Gigan and his Fleet have become.

- Speaking of Gigan, due to the nature of him in the Abraxasverse, Gigan is probably very much nothing like what he was originally designed as. The assimilated tech from countless worlds is offered to him and made one with his own body as he deems fit so to some degree or another, Gigan is essentially the depraved bastard caricature of a million dead worlds, and he relishes in it.

- Following his ‘birth’/'rebirth’, Assimilation!Mechagodzilla basically becomes Abraxas’ little brother essentially - and swiftly reminds both Vivienne and San that little brothers can be a pain in the ass. The 'Abraxas Siblings’ are often found trying to beat the shit out of each other just as often as they are sitting down and chilling.

- Assimilation!Mechagodzilla acts pretty much exactly like a bratty teenage boy or a college frat bro due to the lack of inihbitions from both the San half and Ren half within so it essentially falls to Abraxas to wrangle him whenever he goes too far. He mostly limits it to 'pranks’ or such, but he gets astronomically bored very quickly and might just kick over a building if not stimulated enough. He gets along very well with the other kids such as Leo, Shin, or Ladon - which ends up causing problems since both him and Leo will eagerly goad them into stupid shit or all kinds of shenanigans. Manda and Keeta swiftly become the only sane ones.

It gets worse after he molts too - Desghidorah takes and multiplies Mechagodzilla’s childish and impulsive behaviors by three. 

- The Super Complete Works and novelization also say that Desghidorah is some weird amorphous magma blob thing that simply copied Ghidorah’s appearance and might outright be the embodiment of the universe’s tendency to trend towards entropy. As such, it cannot die but is the embodiment of death and destruction themselves.

Going by this, I think it would very rapidly become apparent that Abraxas!Desghidorah is fucking weird to anyone with a spiritual sense such as Gods like Megalon or Mothra - having the presence of a divinity despite being a Ghidorah offshoot and never once displaying any indications of assimilating that power from elsewhere. Neither one knows what the fuck is up with Desghidorah and it raises serious questions about Ghidorah’s actual nature. 

A villainous Desghidorah would essentially be an unkillable nightmare  barring being sealed like he was in the Rebirth of Mothra films and they’d always risk breaking out to become a threat again in the future so that would be a looming issue they’d need to deal with, even ignoring their sheer power potentially putting several Titsns out of commission. And Assimilation!Desghidorah would probably use their nature as an eternal shapeshifting magma monster to troll people.

---

Lordy, what a smorgasbord! I do like Manda inheriting Rodan’s goofiness; he grows into a regal and elegant dragon who is caring of humans, yet he has his moments where he becomes a bit of a dumbass that makes him more relatable and approachable.

[evansbby]

My notes as I’m reading WG 3 (spoiler alert)

Buckle up, babes, it’s a doozy, I mean, not a 21k word doozy, but nonetheless. And I hope at least someone felt the same way

- ugh, not Curtis being better to Wanda than either Ari or Steve has been. He was lowkey a creep tho??

- Yay, Ari came to find her #teamAri

- Lol at Ari calling Steve a slimeball (he really is one. I’m calling it now)

- Props for not folding during the spanking. You go girl. Call him out on not making you his gf

- Not Ari catching himself almost saying ILY Oop

- Period. You do deserve better than late night dates

- *gasp* he’s not gonna fight for her??

- Crying at the slammed door

- Not Wanda dating Curtis and him acting like he doesn’t know anything 🙄

- I REFUSE to believe Sharon was so blind to Ari cheating on her but why’s she being so nice about the dress? Is Ari that good to her?

- Lol at Ari calling Steve volatile but I bet he lowkey is

- Ari calling Steve bad news? It’s gotta be true. I know it

- Lol at Wanda calling her not Curtis’s type

- Oh Steve. What are you doing at practice??? You’re a filthy liar. NOT a gentleman

- Steve out here being a little TOO forward and Sharon’s so nice but SO blind. What does she mean Ari’s not possessive?? Why is he even with her? What on earth could be tethering the two????

- Lol at the stare-down over ‘lame boy stuff’

- I know Steve is unhinged but him calling Curtis a “Bald fuck” is hilarious

- *omg. Half of these are about name-calling. Do I have the humor of a 12-year-old boy?*

- Lol at Jensen the little announcer. What a cutie

- 🥺poor Jensen lost his glasses

- *GASP* it hit her in the face

- Ari to the rescue

- Ari praise in the bathroom? Yes please.

- ARI APOLOGIZED!!! (But sadly not for everything) THE KISS!!! Sharon better not walk in with the ice…

- ARI PLS JUST TELL HER WHAT STEVE DID

- LOL Sharon, you’re too kind with the ice haha

- Not Steve threatening her on the date. Isn’t he dating her to make Ari jealous tho?? Even just a little bit?

- Ofc she’s smiling at the thought of her ‘date’ with Ari. Idk where this date is going with Steve but I’m scared

- Lol you’re so British for specifying still water. I love it

- Not Kira being scared of Steve. That’s a bad sign

- Omg why did Kira drop out? Is Steve implying it has to do with Ari??

- Steve, you slimeball trying to seduce her before the date. Is it all a ruse????

- IT WAS A RUSE. AND WHY DOESNT HE UNDERSTAND SHE WANTS TO GO HOME??

- Steve, give the girl a shirt that isn’t ripped and send her home.

- Not Steve punching the wall 🤦🏻‍♀️typical frat bro behavior

- “Stop struggling for one second”??????? STEVE!!! YOURE INSANE. I CALLED IT!!!

- Oh Kira, you girl boss. Way to step in. Perfectly timed

- *GASP* ARI BROKE UP WITH SHARON. SOUND THE ALARMS. What do you mean you don’t care????

- Obviously Ari recognizes the hoodie. Something def happened with Kira

- Bestie, Ari’s not acting. Let him care for you

Questions:

1. TEAM ARI BISH. I KNEW IT THE WHOLE TIME AND I TOLD Y’ALL

2. Steve is so unhinged and definitely has some issues he has to work through. MY question is how was Kira able to snap him out of it so easily??

3. Wanda is an ok friend. She’s just a little selfish but obvi doesn’t know what really happened with Curtis and Ari. Can’t really blame her for that even tho she’s a little insensitive

4. Like I said, something def happened between Ari and Kira, but that still doesn’t explain why Ari says Steve is bad news. What was the extent of Steve’s dark past???

I love you for making this but I think I have more questions than when I started. Hopefully Ari will keep pining after her and wait outside her door. Lord knows this girl needs mental support but idk if it’s best to come from Ari. Who could possibly help her truly heal? Does she just need a little time? And what difference would that make then if Ari is a senior and she’s a freshman? What’s supposed to happen when he graduates and if he goes pro??? And also, what on earth was making Ari hold onto Sharon for so long?

Omg I love this sm! I love that you gave a play by play commentary of notes as you read the fic! Thank you sooo much for this, I love it so much! 🥹🥹🥹🩷

Yasss you caught Ari almost dropping the L bomb!!! I love doing that in my fics hehehe it happened in poyt too!!

AND OMG yes thank you for noticing “bald fuck” bc that made me giggle bahahaha. Unhinged!Steve has some funny insults in him I can’t lie!

AND OMFG DO ONLY BRITISH PEOPLE SPECIFY STILL WATER??? Help I thought everyone did that! Bc how are you supposed to differentiate it from sparkling water??? If he’s giving her a bottle of water and he’s rich so he deffo has both still and sparkling in his fridge so he’s gonna ask her which one right??? AM I CRAZY JSNXJSJSJS

Oh and bestie Kira is not afraid of Steve! She was just anxious bc someone she didn’t know was in the house! She’s not good with people she doesn’t know! Bc if you reread the scene, Kira literally comes into the kitchen looking for Steve! And she’s the one who is able to stop him when he’s going insane at the end… so she is definitely definitely not afraid of Steve!!! That’s her big bro 🥹🥹

BESTIEEEEE thank you so much for reviewing!!! This was a pleasure to read! I love how enthusiastically you are on team Ari! 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

[trixstriforce]

hello :) i saw your posts about lu and idk if you were gauging interest in people hearing your opinions. personally i would be super interested in reading what specifically about every lu character is ooc! i am similarly frustrated with the current dominance of lu characterizations in fandom as a ww fan. ive been following for a while i just logged into this side account because i am scared to ask on main :( i hope you do not mind the somewhat bare blog. thank you!

oh my god oh my god oh my god someone wants my opinion??? do u wanna make out???? u do not understand the power u r giving me rn u do not understand how annoying and nitpicky and very passionate i can get specifically about lu bc i care so much about link its unreal and also bc i just like things like linkedmaze, dimensional links, and minaslinkverse better characterization wise bc to me they have shown the "found family links meeting up" thing a lotttt better than lu when i still read it

but to be fair i STOPPED reading around the part where four split due to the way the lu community reacting to the person with DID, a very stigmatized disorder who genuinely just wanted Jojo to acknowledge they messed up in the past and present and didnt like the vauge ass apology she gave making me actually disgusted. ppl talk about accountability then rallied against 1 tumblr user who was uncomfortable bc ppl liked Jojo's comic so she doesnt have to explain that now she respects nonbinary ppl and understands how past things were wrong for her to say we just infer this bc lu good :/ like hey maybe Jojo owned up to it afterwards or something bc she made 2 apologies that would make a YouTuber blush so i was done w/ the community and it was only rlly after that and after i played a few of the actual games + read some mangas i realized wow actually i do not like lu as much as i thoguht i did they butchered my boy, also i feel i should say it literally wouldnt matter to me do what u want in ur au but lu is now a fandom of its own and its influenced a lot of other aus and interpretations of link so i do take issue w/ how ooc these guys end up being

OK HERE R THE MOST BASIC ISSUES W/OUT GETTING INTO EACH LINK RN:

for one i dont know for me having link as a secret hoarder who would rather DIE than use the full scope of his abilities around OTHER HEROS is just no bc thats fucking stupid levels of wanting to appear normal around OTHER HEROS possiblly the ONLY other ppl to ever understand what u r going through

for me having every single link act like a frat boy/standard teenage white boy who is emotionally constipated is a no??? have u SEEN link he is so sociable and kind and understanding to other ppl WHY r the links like this, so many fics just...make them stew in their issues for angst and not trust the others and be incredibly insecure about the other heros(which is lu canon for at least hyrule and wind i think?) and like ok that is definitely fine for 1 link but why r they all like this in the games link is clearly not like that he wouldn't be this closed off and wouldn't hesitate so much like my dude he just inserts himself into other ppl's lives to make them better than leaves he wouldn't pussyfoot around other heros like what

also another major issue is the mergings just lead to certain characterizations or important backstory for certain links(FOUR. LEGEND.) being completely erased and the nuance of their journeys lost like when u merge links who r canonically 100s of years apart not just in the timeline but in the GAMES? yeah u lose things that make that link special

also bc u mentioned wind waker i found it kinda fucked up that wind waker link was delegated to The Kid TM even tho his entire journey was about moving on from the past to a brighter future and he took on the mantle left behind by the hero of time on his own volition and did what Time COULDN'T do which is kill Ganon but he is constantly underestimated and made into the Kid Who Wants Approval trope specifically around Time which sucks ass ngl he deserves to be an equal him still being a kid while the others got to grow up, including Four who's first journey arguably would have been a better fit for this archtype of wide eyed kid, is just side lining one of the most interesting links especially considering most of the other links were YOUNGER than him when they started

this is all general stuff plus 1 of my issues w/ Wind bc ur a Wind Waker fan bc as a Spirit Track fan i feel a kinship, im gonna make another post for specifically each link breaking down my issues w/ how they r portrayed later bc rn it is 8am and i ment to just say haha ty for the permission but then my inner ranter came out i am INCAPABLE of being normal about lu especially after i actually experienced zelda games bc lu was my FIRST introduction to zelda outside of smash bros lol

toast if u r reading this say rip to ur dms bc i am once more gonna talk to u about a comic for a videogame franchise u only know about due to my rambles and forcing u at gunpoint to learn about link...godspeed comrade

[the-whispers-of-death]

don!ainārs is just channeling this post rn

anyways. he has two hands :) local straight man is suddenly forced to question his sexuality when theres 2 hot guys eyeing him ((plus im forcing him to remember the numerous flings hes had with sylvester))

hes telling me that "yeah im not gay but i also like to make out with other guys sometimes lol" and. sir. youre acting like a frat boy. why. why. why. why. please. look in the mirror and tell say that again. you might come to a few lovely realizations about yourself. sir. please.

if he and don!heartthrob ever meet face to face though? shamelessly flirting. enough that he doesnt even realize he's doing it in the first place

~ rusty

Don!Heartthrob just went "I'll put him in a mating press and when I'm done with him, he won't think he's straight" in my head and like why, sir? Why would you say this???

Anyways, Don!Heartthrob is definitely a top and that was proof of it.