#don't even get me started on how it would feel to have some sort of mother figure around

[paper-mario-wiki]

I feel like I've ended up in the same spot as so transmasc before me: I have a lovely cis boyfriend who loves my tits which I love for him, but I am getting dysphoric to the point I wanna lift my lips and show a lil teeth when I see his hands coming towards them. Feels bad because they are his favorite and we haven't been fucking as much because as soon as he starts touching me I am out of it™ and get all in my head and freeze up. Any advice?

good god, brother. i am utterly baffled at why you have elected me as the strategist for this problem, and i'm even more confused as to why you have chosen to go into as much detail as you have.

but.

if i were to give you some advice on this

i'd say that you should consider a conversation with your partner about the long-term plan for the relationship. a "relationship" is two lives that are connected, right? and your life is not one where you're gonna have boobs for the rest of it (or at least based on what you've told me i would assume, should you have your way, those bad boys are gettin lopped off at some point), therefore it's pertinent that it be brought up, because it concerns your life, therefore it concerns the relationship, therefore it concerns him, yes?

now, the first and most obvious thing to start with out the gate is the boundary, made clear and concise: the hills are now closed, off limits to tourists. all discussions regarding this come next. make it clear that it's about something quite core to your identity, and something that does in fact cause physical pain (a panic response from the nervous system is pain homie).

this brings some followup questions (and remember, this isn't an interrogation, it's a dialogue to share): how does he feel about this? if he's against, why? for that matter, how much does it bother him? is there something he doesn't understand about your discomfort? is there some concern he has about your financial or bodily well-being with regards to the procedure? is it because it's vital to his attraction to you as a partner? if that's the case, would their removal be a deal-breaker?

now keep in mind, these question can be brought up whether or not you've got immediate plans to engage in the aforementioned lopping-off of your aforementioned Bad Boys, because the actual point of this dialectical exercise is to create a simple, easy to navigate, easy to understand conversation, which will set a foundation for further negotiations-- should you learn something new about each other, or yourselves, or the relationship as a whole.

either way, i do not think that letting it keep happening and keeping it to yourself is a good idea. i can understand feeling guilty about withholding some physical and emotional gratification you could give "easily" to this person you care dearly for, but trust me when i say that it's not the way to let it be. not just because it's unfair to your partner to secretly grow to resent them for a reason you don't want to vocalize, but to yourself as well.

you may not know it, but by keeping it to yourself you're slowly building up a resentment. that frustration actually shows up pretty clearly in your message. and even if what you're frustrated about is only that particular activity, that activity is irrevocably tied to another person. specifically, a person that you consider to be a pretty central pillar in your life. if that resentment grows, it can evolve into anger, hatred, fear, paranoia, and all sorts of nasty things. and even aside from the emotional and psychological damage that can do, it can grow into a physiological issue, where your brain wears out more and more due to the growing emotional distress ripping through your neurons with all sorts of "emergency" chemicals. like i said, the panic response is a physical pain, even if your body doesn't feel like it "hurts".

so. to summarize.

ABSOLUTELY bring it up. if you don't, it could become damaging to your relationship, and also your actual real life physical brain.

when you do bring it up, remember that the goals are to set a boundary, and to reach an understanding through mutual conversation. it's a dialogue, not a lecture.

when you reach an understanding, figure out if the relationship needs to be renegotiated in some way. that usually means new boundaries, or expectations. or maybe nothing! though surely your boyfriend can find more things to love about you.

that's as best as i can muster. you don't have to follow it, but hopefully it'll at least give you some ideas you can use.

[a-d-nox]

nox tests hypotheses: "saturn tells you what annoys you"

this is one of shawtyherbs hypotheses. this is how i feel this manifests for me in my chart and why i believe this hypothesis works. my saturn is located in my 3h, in taurus at 29°... let's take deep dive!

taurus saturn

a lack of discipline: i feel like i have a strong work ethic - i value hard work. i despised when i did group work in school and i was paired up with procrastinators or people who were unwilling to put in the necessary effort to achieve a good grade. it felt like every time i had my part done i would start getting anxious that the other person/people didn't. it felt like a manipulation - like we were playing chicken. if they didn't do it, would i do it for them? how long did they have to wait until i stepped in?

instability and unpredictability: sudden changes, chaotic environments, and erratic behavior can make me uncomfortable, anxious, and annoyed. i guess it's sort of like a trauma response from childhood except now i get irritable... everyone know my dislike for surprises.

wastefulness: i get easily irritated by wastefulness, whether it's wasting time, money, or resources. again maybe its from my childhood and having those experiences. but i am the type of person who arrives on time. if i buy something and don't like it i use it until it's gone, i eat it til its gone (even if its stale), or i use it til its paid itself off (if i buy a shirt and can't return it and it was $30, i am wearing it 30 times). it sounds strange - i know - but it is how i am...

superficiality: i really value authenticity. i feel like i am easily annoyed by superficial behavior, materialism without substance, and people who put on mask to fit in... like so what if you don't laugh at someone's shit joke, so what if i am happy with my hydroflask and want nothing to do with a stanley (it's all the same to me), and who cares if your true self is not everyone's favorite (you'll find your people a whole lot faster if you're your self).

resisting practicality: you know how much advice i have given throughout the years THAT WAS ASKED FOR and people did what they wanted anyway??? why even waste my time if you don't want outside perspective. or something its just kind advice to help with ease like hi you are using a stain on the deck, i recommend you wipe as you go so it dries quicker and you don't accidentally smear/smudge later. but nooooo.....

saturn at 29°

arrogance: you know it's okay to be wrong... it's not okay to pontificate about how you were right in some alternate scenario. just admit you were wrong in this situation and move on or better yet say nothing...

irresponsibility: when you say you are going to do something do it. if you are a leader then lead and know that you are responsible for anything you designate to someone you view as your subordinate (especially when you don't train them on what you want them to do for you). if you can't commit to having a task or being in charge than don't do it. someone is relying on you - it's 10 times worse when its yourself and you push goals to the side.

unfounded claims/criticisms: perhaps i am overly sensitive to criticism because i tend to take my work and my self a bit too seriously. but if you can't take yourself and what you do seriously, then who will? i take everything personally too. so when i get criticism and its said in a nasty way (at least how i interpret it) or there is a lack of explanation or no backing i will get annoyed. you bet my humor will be ill-tempered... you can't expect me to react well to a comment like "you're wrong". like wow okay so detailed, i'm glad you decided to write one word and a contraction to dismiss my 2k essay. like if you are going to criticize me or disprove me make it detailed and make it sound. and if i do something wrong its probably because no one told me how to do it in the first place (cough cough work) so don't snap at me, walk me through it.

lack of respect: now listen - i'm no angel, i was a teenager once - eyerolls and all. but now that i am a bit older (she said at 23) i am getting to the point where respect isn't freely given (unless its to build a good first impression) but instead its earned in a pre-existing relationship. i don't tolerate disrespect, no one is going to snap at me and tell me what to do. you do that and you will get the opposite reaction that you expect from me (speaking from real life situations). asserting dominance doesn't make you worthy of respect, it makes you a bully.

3h

superficial conversations: i said it why back when in one of my get to know me posts. i prefer deep, meaningful conversations and i find small talk / superficial chatter frustrating or pointless. like skip to the meat bruv - we don't have all this time for "hi how are you?" "good how are you?"

disorganization: a lack of structure, whether in communication, in a learning environments, or my daily routines, irritates me. i feel like it effects me most in the routine bit. weekends are my prime culprit because my schedule falls apart. during the week my meals and tasks are standardized, but on the weekend, i somehow manage to always get annoyed because i eat lunch late or what i had in my mind to do gets tossed aside...

gossip/rumors: i feel uncomfortable with gossip, i prefer facts and reliable knowledge. which i know facts seems shaky when i am posting the content i do... but generally facts over fiction in conversations. gossip and the like almost always gets me in trouble - i struggle with holding my tongue especially when i see someone regularly who has been gossiped about frequently. withholding information is a form of lying in my opinion - and lying makes me extremely uncomfortable.

impulsive decisions: i am trying to get better about this because i tend to carefully deliberate everything. but i don't like when others around me make impulsive decisions that effect me because it ruins the plan i already had in my mind. for example, last weekend i wanted to go to an all day fall festival with my mother (and yes i told her tuesday my plan) but last minute my mother's boyfriend-not-boyfriend said he needed her help with a project and it was going to be an all weekend thing. so friday night my plan went out the window. so quickly had to make a new plan consisting of paid readings, trader joe's, and shampooing my couch (fun stuff i know...).

a lack of respect for rules/boundaries: a disregard for social norms, etiquette, and established rules of communication annoys me so badly. like it is common courtesy (at least for how i was raised) to call or write in advance of stopping over at someone's house. my mother's boyfriend-not-boyfriend is the biggest perpetrator of this behavior. they aren't technically dating anymore so hello hi in my opinion he should be giving us a heads up if he will be stopping over. also switching gears when i say "no" or "i don't want to" i feel like a lot of people around me push me and test me to see if i will change my tune. i don't appreciate that in the slightest. i make clear boundaries in all the relationships i have (even here i have guidelines) - so yes, you bet i get frustrated when i vocalized or wrote my boundaries and yet they get ignored.

do you have a hypothesis you want me to test? or perhaps you want me to build a hypothesis for something you've been wondering about where astrology is concerned? please use my "suggest a post topic" button if you want to see it happen!

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[irislunace]

Siciria Analyzes The Most Complex Stick Figures Known To Man (part 2)

Red's new tiktok came out.

We're going with Red next.

Also here's part 1 of SATMCSFTM.

Idk why I abbreviated it.

Or why I linked it.

Welp.

-

Okay, so to start off, most people perceive Red as the youngest of the CG, and the most outgoing. He's the resident animal lover, is sensitive, and in some situations, can be really aggressive and hotheaded.

Like here:

Red went first. He is someone who always throws himself willingly into danger (like Blue in the last part, though Red does it more consistently). With Dark, he went for it not knowing if he could win, but instead to protect his friends. He is the line. He is someone who truly cares for others, and will treat newcomers with the utmost goodness regardless of what he's getting in return. He will go back for them.

This is shown, primarily, in Monster School.

In this scene, he was about to turn back. He was about to go back through the portal. But he saw that his teammates (the ones who bullied and harassed him prior) were in trouble, and still went back for them. We talk about how he went back for them. We talk about it.

But we don't talk about how he must have been feeling, or how much they must have hurt him. And he still helped them despite that. He truly has an extremely strong character, probably the strongest out of everyone, or at least the CG.

AND HE SURVIVED BEING LITERALLY POSSESSED TWICE. TWICE. HOW MUCH MENTAL STRENGTH DOES THIS STICK HAVE.

Okay, now to not state the obvious. this whole "analysis" thing is just me stating the obvious anyway idk why u guys seem to like it

Red is smart.

No, Red is really smart.

And I think we, as a fandom, don't give him credit for it. He's always the one to come up with new ideas, and these ideas seem to work. This is shown, mostly, in the Minecart Race episode.

He was the first one to start paddling with his hands.

And the first one to boat on the ice.

And he had the bright idea to use the snowballs.

Even in the Color Sorting short, he had to know at least some kind of coding or engineering to get all the items to become red items. Come on.

And in his tiktok that just came out today, he does so many different, unique moves. In Green's and even Blue's, it's more repetitive, and shorter (though Blue's dancing skills are unmatched ngl).

An in Monster School, they only passed because of his ideas (WHICH THEY HARDLY GAVE HIM CREDIT FOR). Because it was HIM who understood that the bow needed to be flipped around to shoot properly.

And it was HIM who knew that tickling the Enderman would help.

And it was HIM who got them across the ocean to the mountain using the spider.

He is someone who can recognize the potential in his teammates, and recognize what they can do in a given battle.

AND WHAT DOES HE GET FROM THEM? NOTHING. NOTHING. HE GETS BEAT UP. HE GETS STICKING BEAT UP.😭😭😭

So in summary...

WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT RED MORE.

(I honestly learned more about Red doing this. It's kinda fun ngl).

[kamimarroco]

A story where Ren suddenly starts chatting with you because he apparently cares about you staying up late at night. Not reviewed, may undergo corrections in the future.

Words: 1100+

“are you still awake?”

The vibration of your phone and the appearance of a notification startled you, almost making you drop the device. You looked closely at the top left corner of the screen and saw the time.

It is currently 2:35 in the morning.

People at this time are usually sleeping, and those who aren't are probably sorting out work issues or are insomniacs.

You didn't fit into either of them, since your irregularity was due to the fact that you were too stubborn.

A shame, really.

You didn't stand on ceremony and immediately clicked on the notification, being taken to the chat with an unknown person.

Well, not really an unknown person... Looking more carefully, your sleepy mind managed to rationalize and recognize who you were talking to.

Oh, it's Ren.

“yea but dw, i'll go to sleep soon”

You immediately saw him start writing after receiving your message.

“are you sure? that doesn't sound honest to me. you've been online a lot lately”

How long exactly has he been watching you to say that? Sure, it's possible to see when your profile is online because of the app's settings, but it makes you wonder if he's been watching you all this time.

“have you been watching me online?”, you ask without hesitation.

You feel him give a slight chuckle from the other side of the screen.

“haha maybe. but don't get me wrong, you really do spend a lot of time awake at night, and that makes me a lil worried”

You're torn between finding his statement strange or acknowledging your not-so-healthy habit. It's true, you're weird, anyone would find it at least slightly worrying that you spend so much time online in the early hours of the morning.

“and what about you? you are also online right now at this very moment”, you retort back, anxiety consuming you as you wait for his response.

He would be considered a hypocrite for finding your habit troubling if he does the exact same thing.

“i have a very valid reason for that. my routine makes me stay awake at night and sleep in the morning or afternoon”

Now you feel an arrow hitting right in the middle of your heart. Sure, of course he would have a good reason to be awake at this hour.

You are the only odd one out in this situation.

“i'm sorry about that, i felt defensive about my habit being called out”, you apologized, worried that your words had come across as rude to him.

“that's alright. it's 2:42 am, no hard feelings”

You felt relieved that he didn't resent your words, despite knowing that they did not convey the same intonation as in real life.

you're thinking too much (or too little), your emotions are starting to eat you up.

“but i still think you should sleep”, he sent a second message.

You felt like a child being scolded by your father, being called out for your unhealthy behavior. You felt your cheeks flush and shame enter your system.

“i already told you, i'll sleep soon”, even if he doesn't notice, you felt like a sullen child trying to explain yourself.

“wheeen?”

“by the holy of god Ren, i'm not some kind of child”, you felt the need to say his nickname (name?) for the first time, trying to emphasize your slight irritation.

This time it took him a while to answer you, seeming to process the fact that you called him by his name. You felt judged in some way for this, thinking that maybe you weren't close enough to call him that.

when did you get so soft? is it sleep that's making you think too much?

Just as you were about to text him an apology, he interrupted you.

“i know that, i just worry about you”, his message warmed your heart in a way you couldn't imagine.

That's… sweet of him. Worrying about you even though you two are just strangers on the internet who bump into each other every now and then.

Are you falling in love?

“i appreciate ur concern, but i know what i'm doing”

No, you don't.

He sent you a picture of a fox with one eyebrow raised, appearing to doubt your certainty.

That brought out a genuine laugh you didn't know you were holding back.

you're leaving yourself vulnerable around him.

“aaaw what a cutie fox!! <3”, you said, referring to the image received.

“it really is! do you like foxes?”

“yea i like them! they are cute and fluffy and i honestly feel like hugging them”

For a while, Ren seemed to forget the fact that you were awake and kept talking to you about random, unrelated topics. Neither of them really had any connection with the other, but one thing led to another.

You noticed how easy it is to talk to him. He has a fluid oratory and is always making associations with other things he knows.

You found yourself incredibly interested and captivated in the conversation you suddenly began having with this stranger.

is this a red flag? shouldn't you be more concerned about a sudden approach?

When you looked at the time on your phone, you realized it was already 3:56 am, almost four in the morning.

Jesus, did you really spend that much time talking to him?

Feeling the tiredness consume you completely, you (finally) felt it was time to let your body have some much-needed rest.

“hey i know we're still talking, but it's almost four in the morning…”, you began delicately, not wanting to give him the wrong idea that you didn't want to talk anymore.

why are you so concerned about what he thinks, in the first place?

“i don't want to let our conversation end here, so i thought we could continue it another time”

Nonono, stop this, you're falling into his trap

“i'm sorry about this, my body is really screaming for sleep”

You idiot.

Ren analyzed your messages a bit before giving a proper response.

“awe that's alright! i really wanted u to sleep in the first place, and i feel kind of guilty that i did a bad job xd”

“keeping u awake and everything”

You felt guilty for him feeling guilty because it wasn't his fault in the first place! You were the idiot who decided to stay up at night, so the damage was already done.

“nonono u didn't! i was the dumb one for staying awake until now”

“i really enjoyed our conversation tbh”

You sent it and already felt your eyelashes getting heavy.

“hehe me too! i look forward to our next conversations”

“but now u really need to sleep, so pls don't stay up too long <3”

Silly little guy. He really gets you, doesn't he?

You felt happy that you had at least met someone during your time awake at night.

[melodiesinmotion-if]

Here's a classic one! How would the ROs react if a shy MC is being flirted with and doesn't like it, so they send "Help me!" eyes to the RO?

It's classic because it hits every single time!

Violet: First of all, instantly jealous that anyone would even think about flirting with MC while she's in the room. But also absolutely enamored with how adorable MC looks over there being so polite while subtly pleading for her to walk over. It feels nice to be needed, you know? Most people assume she would fly off the handle, but that's not the case. It's more "matter of fact" with her. She'd likely strut over, grab MC by the shoulders, and say, "They're not interested. Get a fucking clue," while dragging them off. MC wouldn't live it down though. Violet be insufferable and constantly remind them that she saved them and they owe her.

Jett: Oh, it's definitely going to get worse for MC before it gets any better. He sees the eyes they're making at him, but he's going to play stupid before he goes over there. MC is likely going to have to sweat and suffer for 5 to 10 more minutes before he shows up. Even then, he's not going to get to the point. He'd say some dumb shit like, "Oh, MC, who is this? Don't be rude, introduce me," before letting the person ramble on and on. He's absolutely going to engage the conversation too. Let them embarrass themself a little by thinking they have a chance. Once everyone has suffered enough, he'd simply grab MC's hand and leave the person in the dust. (He's definitely grabbing MC's ass when he knows the person is looking - just for good measure and ya know, to watch MC squirm.)

Jagger: Jagger comes off as fairly non-nonchalant, but he's actually pretty protective. He's likely already got eyes on MC before they start pleading for help. Unlike his twin, he'd be there instantly. He'd say nothing - just grab MC's hand and walk the other way. If he's had a few drinks, he'd probably flip the other person off as they're walking away. Otherwise, he wouldn't cause a scene.

Mikki: Literally the worst person to ask for help. The amount of people they've let ramble on about shit they don't care about for the sake of not being rude is...almost pathetic. They'd see the pleading eyes and instantly start sweating. They wouldn't even walk over there and say anything. Instead, they'd call MC and pray MC was brave enough to pretend the phone call was more important.

Ryder: Sort of like Violet, he'd be pretty jealous. He'd likely be hovering around MC anyway; he worries for them. The second he saw the pleading, he'd be over there. He'd probably come up with the worst excuse - like accidentally spilling a drink on the other person or pretending MC was someone he knew from his childhood. He'd get them out of there, but it would not be in the easiest way.

[teecupangel]

Hii teecup!! Hope you're doing well!!

May I ask some a/b/o AltDes stuff please (alpha! Altaïr and Omega!Desmond) because there's not much of it out there :'D

Now I'm sure Altaïr would more open minded and much less of an asshole to omegas then most of the people back in his days..... HOWEVER, please hear me out, what if he wasn't

He could be low-key about it, unlike most alphas who are very vocal and open about their 'opinions' on Omegas and such. He's very aloof when it comes to omegas in general, not having strong feelings on anything (very Altaïr behaviour honestly). That is until he meets Desmond.

Now instead of time travel, this time Desmond was born in Altaïr's time. This means Desmond would be raised as a traditional and submissive omega, but he still fought back. He could be born in Alamut (because Eagle of Alamut XD) as the son of the mentor (who is not Diya al-Dīn because he would never) who trained and became an assassin... sort of because idiot bigots.

Desmond is the best assassin in his entire brotherhood, BUT he's not officially an assassin. His father/mentor isn't as strict like most and let him get away with his antics, usually.

That is until Desmond was 'of age' and that's when it starts getting bad for our boy. His dad became more controlling and won't let him sneak off to do missions or fight anymore. He was to be married to whoever the assassins could use as allies. Basically just a bargaining chip. Desmond would fight back harder then ever, even with one of the best assassins guarding him and monitoring his move all the time, he would still be able to sneak off to continue doing missions to make them see just how capable he was.

He could runaway, he probably should runaway, but deep down all he wanted was for his father to love him again. To look at him with pride and treat him like a son again. (Altaïr would use this fact as an advantage later on)

But then it all comes crashing down when he finally gets betrothed. (Idk who he should be betrothed to LMAO it could be whoever. Someone very powerful that the assassins could use)

And all was going to shit for Desmond but it all went to super shit when Altaïr showed up. Because oh boy, Altaïr was a Strom of his own.

Now I honestly don't know how he and Altaïr meets, but it definitely left an impression on Altaïr because he was smitten from the first time they made eye contact. Man was obsessed from here on out kajsksjssoakakak.

And uhh yeah that's all I've got, plot wise

Some notes.

- Desmond pulling all the alpha assholes like catnip.

- Altaïr, manipulating Desmond as a sign of affection

- Malik suffers because we love him <33

Honestly teecup, I just wanted a toxic a/b/o au but it grew plotty legs and ran out of my grasps, my apologies.

And that's all for now!

Sorry in advance if my English is very trying, I'm typing on my phone and it's not the best experience.

PS please make it as toxic and horny as Tumblr allows you to, and I would give you my kidneys.

PPS if you think you know who I am by how I write..... No you don't/lh

As horny and as toxic as Tumblr would allow it? I don’t even know the limit of Tumblr’s tolerance hahahaha

So for this one, if you want Desmond to be born in Alamut as a son of the mentor but not Diya al-Dīn, we can make him the son of an older brother of Diya al-Dīn instead. Born more as a way for the older brother, who was passed over because Diya al-Dīn was more worthy of the title, to try and get power with his son being the next in line for the imam since Diya al-Dīn was still childless at that point.

Diya al-Dīn would be the kind uncle who tried to do right by his nephew but can’t truly intervene because his brother was controlling and had a firm grasp on Desmond’s every day life. It was going well, all things considered.

Desmond wasn’t a genius nor was he inherently talented but he was a hard worker and he always went beyond what was required of him.

His father rewards his hard work by giving him a bit of leeway, all the while making him drink medicinal tea that was meant to change him into an alpha.

It didn’t do anything but hide his scent… which had been easy to do in the first place because those not yet of age only had a hint of scent to show their ‘status’.

Diya al-Dīn tried to be accepting of Desmond’s wish to be an Assassin even if omegas aren’t exactly… well… only omegas that could control their ‘base instinct’ could become Assassins which was hard for an omega without the help of some kind of medicine that would leave them in pain or groggy.

Desmond, unfortunately, is one of the omegas that cannot be medicated. Even if he drank more than he should, that only leaves him in unbearable pain.

That’s why his father pivoted from Desmond becoming the next imam to having some talks with certain powerful rulers. Finding Desmond an alpha that would take him as their official wife or one of his concubine.

His father was less picky of Desmond’s standing and more interested in creating a political bond with a powerful ally (whether he plans to use this to usurp Diya al-Dīn or he simply wants more power outside of the Brotherhood is up for grabs)

And he finally finds one but Desmond would enter into that household as a concubine. His marriage proposition wasn’t a good one all things considered, the alpha was a powerful one but it was well known that his official wife and the older concubines were dangerous. Newer concubines either die from poisoning or accidents or childbirth and, more often than not, their children would not survive more than five summers.

So Desmond escapes. Maybe, just maybe, Diya al-Dīn had a hand in the patrol routes that night and it left certain large windows of opportunity for Desmond to use.

Alamut, of course, will look for him. That’s why Desmond would try to hide from them.

That’s how he meets Altaïr.

He was desperate and his heat was upon him. Altaïr’s scent was overpowering and he could feel it within him that this was an alpha that would fight tooth and nail to keep his omega safe.

He wasn’t a romantic.

He had already accepted the very idea that his alpha would not love him.

He doesn’t need it.

Love did not bring his omega parent any happiness, no matter how overflowing their love for Desmond’s alpha father had been.

What he needed was an alpha who would take care of him and any child he would bear.

So he used his scent to weaken the alpha’s defenses.

It was Desmond who made it impossible for Altaïr to resist.

And so Altaïr claimed him.

.

Unorganized Notes:

Desmond escaped a few weeks after Altaïr killed Rashid but before AC Bloodlines. (So late Sept, early Oct)

He was on his way to Alamut to talk to Diya al-Dīn about being the new mentor (he doesn’t want to be the next mentor) and they actually spent Desmond’s heat in a random abandoned home

Alamut Assassins found them afterwards and, by that point, Desmond was sooo thoroughly claimed that there was no way to say that Altaïr wasn’t his alpha.

This also changed Altaïr’s desire to not be the mentor because the easiest way to keep Desmond by his side is to be the mentor of Masyaf with his marriage to Desmond being a way to ‘mend’ the broken relationship between Alamut and Masyaf.

Desmond’s father was not pleased but fuck him, by law, Desmond was now the property of his mate and Altaïr has no qualms killing the asshole if he doesn’t stop yapping about how he raised Desmond and should have the final say on everything.

He returns to Masyaf and… sorta kicked all the Flowers of Paradise. To be more exact, they were transferred to another part of the fortress while the entirety of Paradise became Desmond’s new home. (Desmond and his most definitely growing child)

That is the second headache Malik got.

The first one was the fact that Altaïr returned with Alamut’s blessing as the mentor (which Altaïr had stressed he would never take) and an omega mate (which he had always said would never happen)

Desmond is free to go anywhere in Masyaf but he will always have guards on him because security reason.

Desmond believes Altaïr’s affection stemmed from the fact that he did more or less coerced Altaïr to biting him during the throes of heat-induced passion so he wants a child to further keep Altaïr ‘happy’ and satisfied (not knowing that the mentor title isn’t passed down from father to son in Masyaf, he honestly believe Altaïr is Rashid’s adopted son)

Altaïr was never fully enthralled during Desmond’s heat. He has been trained to have high tolerance as part of Rashid’s plan to make him the ultimate ‘attack dog’. He marked Desmond fully knowing Desmond was desperate and was trying to ‘seduce’ him.

Honestly, Altaïr just wanted Desmond because his scent had been the sweetest ambrosia he had ever smelled and he believed that meant they were meant to be.

And he will not let anyone get between them, no matter who they may be.

[katsona-the-katsequel]

Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad Activity Report

Part 4

16 new entries!

6/27 (Sat) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada

It seems like I've worried everyone. I'm grateful, but there's no need to worry. As a senior, I can't show any shame. Well, that's enough about that topic.

More than that, it seems that the number of Apathy Syndrome cases is increasing again. This time there were many cases where apparently a pair of a man and a woman became Lost at the same time. Maybe it has something to do with the characteristics of the next large Shadow...

Well, it's best not to jump to conclusions.

We'll find out when the next full moon comes. Oh, and I heard a rumor at school that's bothering me. Apparently, something called a "revenge request website" is becoming a hot topic.

It's the sort of urban legend that says that if you post something on the site, someone will take revenge for you...

Sorry, I can't really explain why this story is bothering me. I think it would be more persuasive if someone with a keen sense like Takeba explained it. If I find out anything else, I'll let you know.

6/28 (Sun) - Reporter: Junpei Iori

Hello, I'm Junpei.

The two seniors are out again today, so we'll be taking a break from fighting in Tartarus.

Yukari-chan's sharp intuition, you know... Well, it certainly seems like there are times when it seems like she has some weird intuition. The moment I started talking about Yuka-tan, someone asked me from behind, "Junpei, did you say something?"

I wish I could have the keen intuition to sense Yukari's approach, like Lucia from Fuuka.

Whenever I say something strange in a report, it always comes back the next day...Maybe this is also a woman's intuition?

Hmm, Yuka-tan is truly formidable...

6/29 (Mon) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Well, this is Takeba.

Well... there's a full moon in just a week. I won't be able to do it every day, but I've been gaining strength in Tartarus and I feel like I've made progress. But, as expected, the lack of information beforehand is a problem. All we know is that it's a full moon, and we can't decide on a strategy. If anyone knows anything, please let me know as much as you can. This was Takeba.

7/12 (Sun) - Reporter: Fuuka Yamagishi

Good evening, this is Yamagishi.

I'm a little proud that I've been talking for two days in a row, as if I've got all this equipment all to myself.

Today, everyone seems to be studying in their rooms. Sanada-senpai was out all day, but he came back after dark and it seems like he's also holed up in his room.

When will everyone be able to hear my voice? Maybe not until after the exams are over?

I've thought about it a lot, but I don't think anyone is to blame... We are all just doing our best to do what we can, but it's sad to see them separated like this.

Each person has something that only they can do. There are times and places when their power is needed. This is the case now, when there are so many people suffering from Apathy Syndrome, and in the case of SEES, and in the case of Personas.

Isn’t that what power is?

...I believe that everyone will understand without me having to say it. For now, let's do our best to study for the exam.

I have some research to do, so I'll just mess around with my device for a bit before getting back to studying. Well, good night...

7/13 (Mon) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Well, it's Takeba. Oh, exams start tomorrow. I thought I'd take a break and write up my activities for the first time in a while.

Ha. Seriously, after hearing that message from Fuuka, I can't not say anything at all, Fuuka is surprisingly cunning.

First of all, I'd like to say something about how everyone has been quick to avoid touching the sore spot and has not come to ask, yet have a strong aura of wanting to know what's going on.

I talked to the leader a bit about it, but I apologized to Kirijo-senpai for what happened the other day. Sorry for saying too much. There are still some parts I'm not entirely convinced of, but then there are people close to me who are suffering from Apathy Syndrome, and if I fight the shadows, I might be able to cure that, so I can't just sit back and watch. Yeah. That's right.

Oh, and thank you Chairman for your suggestion to go to Yakushima. I'm looking forward to it. Well, if you don't tell me a pun as a thank you, I'll be sure to not give you a cold shoulder just this once.

And then... oh, that's right. That idiot Junpei Iori is always complaining about swimsuits. He should be the only one without Yakushima, so I hope he gets a part-time job at the swimsuit section of a department store. This was Takeba.

7/14 (Tue) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada

Today is the first day of the final exams. Thanks to the Chairman's timely suggestion, the atmosphere in the dorm seems to have improved a little. Of course, there is still that tense atmosphere that is unique to exam periods, but this tension is not unpleasant.

To be honest, it's painful to see a child being lured in by sweets to get in a good mood, but that's just how it is. I guess that's actually what we made such a fuss about.

Come to think of it, this was the first time we'd had such a big fight since the current second-year students moved into the dorms... I hope this is a rite of passage, and if we can get through it, we'll be able to build a new relationship.

Also, apart from the Mitsuru incident, Junpei seems to have been annoyed for some reason, but are you okay?

Well, I'm sure you're overwhelmed with your exams right now, so I hope you can calm down. ...I'm probably not the one to say this here, Junpei. I don't know what happened during the exams, but I think you should stop yelling things like "Kabara! Kabara! Yakushima!" on the main streets.

7/15 (Wed) - Reporter: Junpei Iori

Sanada-san, don't you know the expression "samurai compassion"? Well, I don't want to say it.

Well, the problem with the insurance in Edogawa was so confusing that I exploded with anger on the way home from school. As for my case, I can see the answer in my mind, so it's okay. Thank you.

7/16 (Thu) - Reporter: Fuuka Yamagishi

Good evening, this is Yamagishi.

Today was the third day of the exam. I was surprised to see that the history question that the teacher said "will be on the exam" during class actually came up. The teachers at Gekkoukan are surprisingly kind, aren't they?

The correct answer is that the reason the foreigners on the Black Ships were afraid of topknots was because they thought they would be attacked by guns.

This time, we had a fight with a large Shadow just before the exam, so Yukari, Junpei, and the leader didn't seem to be very prepared, and the second-years are struggling. But when they think about the ocean waiting for them after the exams, they feel a little better. Yakushima, huh... I bet the water is beautiful.

7/17 (Fri) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Uh, I'm Takeba. I just heard yesterday's report, and I thought the answer to that question was... a projectile, is that correct? Seriously? Wow, I should have listened to the lecture properly!

I chose the second one, "they thought it was a black fish cake." Because in the past, Westerners hated fish! Ugh, I failed!

Ugh, to be honest, I'm not that confident about today's physics lesson. I worked hard to memorize the formulas and laws, but I was wondering who discovered the principle behind contact lenses, which is a bit of trivia! I chose Da Vinci for now, but... God!

7/23 (Thu) - Reporter: Fuuka Yamagishi

This is Yamagishi now.

Welcome home everyone.

This is my first time living in a dormitory, but it already feels like home. Having a place to go back to, a place you want to return to... I'm a little happy.

Everyone is tired today, so we took a break from conquering Tartarus. I was tired too, but talking to Aigis kept me awake... and I ended up staying up late.

Aigis is really amazing. I'm a little good with machines, but I can't believe that this technology has not been known until now.

They say cutting-edge technology is created on the battlefield, but I can't help but think how difficult the battle against shadows was 10 years ago.

Ah, but Aigis herself seems more like a girl with a bit of a natural air about her than a weapon. How did you incorporate a mind into a robot? Mr. Ikutsuki also said that the core part is a black box and that he cannot touch it.

It's also strange that Aigis seems to know the leader. It means that he's having trouble recognizing someone who looks similar to him...

It's no good to take your friends' privacy so seriously, right? First of all, you have to think about how everyone and Aigis can get along.

Oh, that's right. Aigis's way of speaking is interesting, isn't it? It's not exactly military-like, but it's more like an honorific that she learned by mistake. When we swam together in Yakushima, she pointed at my swimsuit and said,

"I am concerned about the armor of that underwater weapon, but is it correct to understand that the emphasis is on maneuverability? If possible, I would like to try modifying it for underwater combat." This is the first time I've seen a robot that wants to wear a swimsuit.

Aigis, it's nice to meet you.

7/24 (Fri) - Reporter: Junpei Iori

Hi, Junpei here. What's up? You brought this report machine to Yakushima? That's fishy, ​​Kirijo-senpai! If I'd known, I could have brought you Junpei Iori's swimsuit watching hour.

Well... well, I can't run away, so I'll tell you... today is the day of the test results.

7/25 (Sat) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Uh, this is Takeba.

As of today, we have a new member...or rather, he's not in SEES, he just lives in the same dorm, but a new member has arrived. As the Chairman said before, Amada-kun is moving into the dorm.

...I'm a little, no, I'm really worried, but I hope that Amada-kun won't get caught up in a fight or something like that.

The Chairman seems to be pretty matter-of-fact about it, and seems to be like, "If you can fight, let's have you participate."

I feel like I understand my senior a little bit, so I believe that she has no intention of involving Amada-kun. But even so, you still say "at this point," right? Oh, no, I'm not complaining, I know that you're in a position where you have to say that, and that's what you're saying because you yourself are thinking about it. As the head of SEES, you have to think about all the possibilities.

Yes, it’s just a possibility.

So, for now, please take this as my personal opinion as Yukari Takeba. I am against letting Amada fight. Unless Amada himself has a very good reason to fight, I am against it.

Please remember that.

7/26 (Sun) - Reporter: Junpei Iori

Hello, it's Junpei!

Hehehe, having a great summer!

But I'm always like this. I have an innocent heart that is happy to take a day off!

That's the image I want as a healthy high school boy! So, summer vacation starts today. Ah, the long and painful midterms, the long and painful final exams, the occasional but painful quizzes, the painful first semester, Wow! Well, anyway, summer vacation starts today. Let's have fun starting tomorrow!

…Huh. Well, I know it's stupid to make a fuss by myself, even if I say so myself.

However, I just couldn't help but make a fuss today...

Ai-chan did a simulation of what would happen if the number of Lost continued to increase, in other words, if we don't do our jobs properly... but the results were worse than I expected, and I'm feeling depressed.

It feels like a huge responsibility.

7/27 (Mon) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Uh, this is Takeba.

What's up, Junpei? You've given it some thought. Yes, that's right, it's a big responsibility. Well, keep that in mind and work hard. Just don't do stupid things.

Come to think of it, I didn't see the leader today, but he's doing intensive training for the sports club. He'll do his best, too. Maybe I should go to the archery club's voluntary training too...

8/3 (Mon) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Well, this is Takeba. Anyway, congratulations on winning, leader! You did a great job. The Myo-o Cup is a pretty high level, isn't it? If you keep going like this, I think you can make it to the national tournament. Will you be popular in the second semester? Ah, aside from that, I'd rather report something like this: "I happened to see this kind of person'' on TV, but I did see a strange person.

He was at a takoyaki shop in Saitodai Shopping Arcade, stuffing takoyaki into his mouth with incredible force. He had an athletic look, and I'd say he could be considered good-looking, but his face as he devoured it... It's what's inside that counts. This was Takeba.

8/4 (Tue) - Reporter: Junpei Iori

Hi...Junpei...it's hot.

It has been really hot since the afternoon, but the night was a tropical one just as expected! I wasn't expecting anything like that. I wish it would go against our expectations and snow!

Ugh, the heat is making my brain overheat, seriously.

<-PREVIOUS ● NEXT->

[babacontainsmultitudes]

I was relistening to some of the trial arc stuff the other day (aheem heem), and found myself wondering who on earth Nick went to Universal Studios with, since it obviously wasn't Glenn. Then I remembered this adorable dad fact:

have I mentioned that Darryl's dad facts are objectively the best

So yeah, Darryl acting as a substitute dad taking Nick along with them whenever he brought Grant to theme parks true and real and beautiful to me now!

[Which got me thinking about the very non-canonical scenario in which stay-at-home-cooks-and-cleans-and-really-kinda-does-everything-for-his-son coach dad Darryl finds out that Nick sometimes spends a few months at a time by himself due to his dad's line of work and insists that Nick stay at the Wilson household so eventually he does and he and Grant get quite close as a result but Grant can't quite understand why Nick gets so emotional every time the family sits together for dinner and insists on helping Darryl around the house and laughs so wholeheartedly at all his dumb dad jokes and OUGH SORRY IT'S JUST NICK CLOSE MAN OUGHHHH]

[icewindandboringhorror]

I have found a beautiful perfect humble rock specimen that is light yellow with a weird dark yellowy brown lining, somewhat resembling a chunk of smoked gouda cheese... effervescent

[ozzgin]

Just read your arranged marriage kidnapped by a most post and the humor in the servants always thinking reader is in peril. The same going for monster hubby (He just thinks they're submissive and breedable)

Like none of them realize they are a moster fucker cause they hide it so well. Like just imagining reader be like "oh be gentle with me I'm a dainty maiden" and then giving him the night of his life is hilarious. Or them having dinner and the servants feel bad for them cause monster hubby is eating human meat but their just thinking about other things he can use his tongue on.

Or maybe someone comes to rescue them from the terrible monster finally. But they don't wanna leave and instead fight the knight off. The knight thinks they've been brainwashed or something. Meanwhile the servants think the knight just wasn't good enough to rescue them.

Content: gender neutral reader, monster romance, NSFW! [Part 1] | [More Monsters]

The servants are not blind by any means: they can tell, quite plainly, that their monstrous Lord has a soft spot for you. Not only that, but the beast nearly worships you! They've come up with many theories, the latest one involving witchcraft. Surely you must have some sort of magical trickery under your sleeve in order to subdue their Master. There's no other way around it. All previous humans have been devoured, or have died in a pitiful attempt to escape, terrified to the bone upon gazing at his blasphemous Majesty.

You can't blame them. It's probably better for everyone involved if you omit the fact that your source of witchcraft lies in your...genitals. Well, not just that, of course. Your husband had started to lose hope. His appreciation of humans never came to fruition before your arrival. He was expecting you to cower in fear, not throw yourself at him.

He wondered if you wanted something from him in return, but no one could possibly pretend so flawlessly: the way you clung to him unprompted. The way you hungrily took him in, tears welling in your eyes, refusing to let go until you could feel his load avalanching down your throat. The way you'd trap his hips with your legs, despite being weak and feverish, asking that he doesn't stop yet. If that wasn't proof enough, your whines and moans were loud and clear. To think he could have his own little human, one who isn't repulsed by his monstrous form. He would've been content with mere tolerance, yet someone who begged to be fucked by him? He's been delirious ever since.

He loves everything about you, naturally, but he can't deny the shameless addiction he's now developed towards your body. He'd pound you anywhere and anytime if he could. If he needs to leave for official matters, know that the return will burn in the back of his mind.

"An important date, Sir?" one traveling servant will ask, glancing at all the scribbles in the calendar.

"Indeed", he answers solemnly. It's the times when he can finally fuck you dumb.

While the servants worry about their devilish Master being put under leash, for the other fellow humans the opposite seems to be true. You recall your last "rescuing" attempt distinctly. During one of your evening walks, burly, foreign arms swept you off in an instant. Before you knew it, you were holding onto the armored shoulders of an unknown man, as he made his way out of the traditional garden.

"I'll get you out of here", he promised between heaving breaths.

You stared in confusion. What was he saving you from? A good dicking? No matter how much you explained that you do actually like your newly appointed husband, the hero wouldn't budge.

You ended up just walking back home when the man fell asleep.

"That was quite the long walk", your monster partner remarked, polishing his weapons.

"Oh no, I was kidnapped", you state casually. "Got us some fruits on the way back."

Would it have been better to lie about it? On one hand, you do feel terrible for whoever attempted to retrieve you from the claws of the tyrant. Your husband is very possessive, and you know he'll scorch the Earth until that treacherous pest is gutted and fed to the pigs.

On the other hand...he becomes particularly savage after such incidents. You won't be able to sit properly for the next few weeks, but it's worth it.

Tough luck, you tell yourself, lounging in bed with a satisfied smirk and torn apart hole.

[giamee]

🌐 ᯓ★୭ ˚. ᵎᵎ

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐀 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐃𝐑𝐔𝐍𝐊 '𝐍 𝐍𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐘!

hsr men x f!reader .... SMUT!! 🚨🚨🚨

request ؛ ଓ @coreakin-sakarat What will the honkai star rail men play when yr having sex and who bottom or both and do they go rithm oh oh and do they use toys on u and what are their favorite parts of ur body to fuck

gia's notes ؛ ଓ i did this as more of me just... talkin abt what i think the hsr men are like in bed in order from least to most freaky in my humble opinion. i hope that you like it even though i didn't exactly hit every point u brought up :(

DAN HENG .ᐟ୨୧ starting it off sweet with him, i see dan heng as more of a bottom than anything... he's not super experienced, quite a tender lover, and i see him as remaining quite serious and stoic within the bedroom too. definitely more of a slow and sensual pace, just wants to feel it all with you <3 he's quite hesitant to try things out imo, but i reckon that you could convince him to try out using toys with some convincing! 1000% a thigh guy, really likes pulling out and painting your thighs with his cum as he watches them shake. presses kisses to your forehead as you come down from both of your highs. lowkey i get the vibe that the aftercare and the cuddling and falling asleep together is more satisfying to him than having sex. THIS MAN CRAVES SKIN TO SKIN!!!! he will interlace your fingers while fucking and kiss all over your face!!! a very sweet lover <3

GEPARD .ᐟ୨୧ this man SCREAMS pleasure service top to me. he could cum in his pants just by watching you i swear. he just wants to satisfy you as best as he can :((( your wish is his command frfr. he'll put you in whatever positions you want fully customisable experience just say the word. will sometimes pause midway through sex just to ask you if he's doing a good job and if it feels good with his big puppy dog eyes AWEE. i think he would probably be a little hesitant to try out toys, especially at first? his logic reverts to him assuming that he wasn't good enough at pleasuring you and so you have to revert to a piece of plastic... but be a bit dominant and show, don't tell, him just how good a vibrator can feel and he'll be a lot more on board with the idea <3 his whole mentality is just.. do anything to give you pleasure so if you're on the freakier side, this man is game! (PEG HIM) the little sadistic side of you gets a kick seeing tears well up in his eyes if you edge him just to hear his whines and moans... he might be a top but this man is a sub thru and thru. a bad bitch (you) tells him what to do and he listens!! anyways back to when you and him are fucking... this man is just utterly in love with your pussy, they way it gushes and clenches around him, and his absolute favourite position is any where he gets to just bury his face in ur tits while he's buried inside of you because everything is just so comforting and all of him is now surrounded by something so warm and soft... he's in heaven <3 so yeah he's a tits guy who would have thought!! no matter the shape or size HE'S PUTTING THEM IN HIS MOUTH <3 his thrusts get real sloppy at the end when he's about to cum too, starts babbling in your ear about how good it feels and how much he loves u. what a cutie pie

ARGENTI .ᐟ୨୧ to be honest? i had to think a bit about this one. to me, argenti doesn't really seem like the type to bring up using toys... but that doesn't mean that he isn't game if you mention it. he seems ... not passive exactly? but he just seems like the type to go with the flow with sex. whatever you're into he'll just be like shit i'm down let's go. not kinky per se, but he's definitely a passionate lover. very much wants to explore sensuality. ooh maybe he would be into some sort of wax play or blindfold type behaviour i take it back. would probably chuckle if you decide to get on top and place his hands on your hips to help you adjust to his size and set your own pace <3 very loving, wants to celebrate the beauty of your naked body and worship it in the name of adrila. so yeah if you've got a praise kink, HE'S YOUR MAN!!! you feel like the subject of a poem as he sings your praises, telling you how pretty you look and sound when you cum. like shiiiii that would be enough to make me blush <33 in terms of pace and stuff, i feel like he would be pretty standard? maybe on the slower side because of... you know... passion. it's nothing crazy but still a good time. he seems like he prefers to be looking up at you so RIDE THAT MAN!! maintain eye contact as you sink down on it. raise your hips back up ever so slowly and watch the slightest twitch of his brow as you swivel your hips, sinking back down on it ever so slowly. you might just see him blush. and just as the name suggests, the knight of beauty is a SIGHT to behold when he cums (probably inside).

WELT .ᐟ୨୧ yeah peepaw has got some EXPERIENCE to him lmaoo. he's got a sort of... cheekier? side to him. as an older man, though, he doesn't exactly have the same stamina as he did in his youth :( but that doesn't mean that he can't still get down and dirty with you!! quite the opposite actually. so his solution? he uses toys on you <3 he's more of a bottom but he is DEFINITELY in charge. his dirty talk OMFGG im giggling just thinking about it he would praise you and whisper such sweet words to you as he slowly splits you open on his fat cock, telling you how you're such a good girl for taking him so well, how you feel so good around him, all so he can feel you clench around him like a vice grip as he finally bottoms out <33 def would just have his hands around your waist as he moves you up and down his length when you're feeling weightless. but if he's in a more passive mood, he also LOVESSSS just sitting back and watching you struggle to ride him with a lazy adoring look in his eyes as he holds a vibrator to your clit <333 he'll coo at you as you start crying from the overstimulation, his hands wiping away your tears so tenderly and encouraging you to keep going just for him <3 a little bit of a sadistic side to him because he really does just love watching you squirm. another thigh and ass guy imo, really loves the way they jiggle as they slam down against his own thighs as you start to pick up the pace and ride him with increasing desperation. also loves watching them shake when you cum <3. so yeah as a no brainer i think one of his favourite positions would be reverse cowgirl. yum <3

BOOTHILL .ᐟ୨୧ now dont get me wrong this man FUCKS. since he's a cyborg does his dick count as a toy...? yeah fuck it let's go with it HIS BIOCOCK VIBRATES!! so the sensations on that will go CRAZYYYY. and then i'm thinking because of his synthesia beacon and stuff he doesn't exactly experience much sensation down there. so when you're having sex, what gets him off the most is just seeing your pleasure as you unravel. makes him feel good vicariously <3 so yeah definitely a missionary lover in my eyes so he can watch all your facial expressions and reactions as he hits all the right places, how your brows furrow and your eyes slide shut and eyes roll back in your head as he keeps up his unforgiving pace at juuuuust the right angle <33 but don't get me wrong he's no vanilla bitch either!! if he wants to be feeling more ... sensations he can and will make you just sit on his face for actual HOURS just eating you out to his heart's content. you'd think that his tongue is cybernetic too with the way it flicks across your clit at a borderline INHUMAN speed. but no he's just that good. some of ur most intense orgasms have been from him tonguefucking you like this, his head firmly sandwiched between your quivering thighs as you're basically humping his face as u ride out your high. and hey, he's not complaining <3 and then his smug shit-eating grin does NOT help at all when you're still trying to come back down to earth and he's sitting up wiping the slick off his face with that hungry look STILL in his eyes good lord i hope u can survive the night. this bastard has definitely ruined toys for you, they just don't feel the same any more <//3

BLADE .ᐟ୨୧ fucks hard. angry and/or jealous sex with him has just gotta be >>> 😮‍💨😮‍💨 he's on the rougher side and for MOST of the time will dom. and also tbh i don't really see him as being the type to use toys since he's more spontaneous in terms of having sex (public sex. he's got a high sex drive) but very very passionate for sure- lots of grunts and low moans right up in ur ear mhhhnrng. but also at the same time i feel like he would be quite emotionally detached from sex at first, seeing it as more like stress relief than an act of intimacy? and don't get me wrong, some of the best fucks of your life have come from him when he's just trying to release some pent up anger, but on the flip side there's a more vulnerable side to him, almost. one that's barely there any more from years of bitterness and resentment, but still manages to creep up on him on those late nights where he can't quite sleep. so if you're with him on those rare occasions, this is when you experience him not fucking you, but making LOVE. he won't talk, but he doesn't need to, not with the way he's holding you close to him and kissing you with something akin to desperation as he sinks into you and kind of just... stays there for a bit. it's oddly comforting to him, and if he's feeling especially weak he'll need some comfort- just to get him through the night. it's these nights where you take control more, setting a slow and sweet pace and kind of just... hushing him and whispering sweet words to him as you slowly let yourself grind over him, feeling the way he twitches inside of u <333 but yeah back to not vulnerable blade. a fan of quickies for sureeee (see: high sex drive) another tit guy because i am biased. the force of his thrusts in some dark alleyway or hidden corner will have them jiggling and threatening to fall out of whatever shirt you wear. and if he's got you lifted up in his arms, your legs wrapped around him as you're chest to chest with each other, he just can't tear his eyes away from your boobs. leaves bites on them, laves over them like a damn dog until they're coated in saliva and stiff and perked up because of how cold it feels when drying on your skin. if you're in doggystyle, you'll feel his hands clasp over them from behind, a few short and sweet squeezes to them before his blunt nails are flicking over your nipples just to hear you squeal <3

AVENTURINE .ᐟ୨୧ just like blade, he very much has two different modes. let's start with the freaky one bc that's fun. he's quite open to experiment with all aspects of sex- who's in charge, who's topping, toys, positions, you name it. he trusts you enough to do anything with or to you short of causing each other pain. so yeah he's a freak alright!! i feel like if you're in an established relationship, he'll feel guilty due to the amount if time that he spends away from you because of his job, and make it up to you by spoiling you with gifts... he loves to buy you new toys to try out as he sits back and just watches as you squirm and then writhe in pleasure as he slowly palms himself, eventually unzipping his trousers and jerking himself off until he cums all over u <33 definitely gets a kick out of seeing his cum painting your pretty face and how your tongue darts out to catch it before it drips onto the floor <333 or maybe he just strokes himself to stay hard, his eyes hungrily watching you as your own remain transfixed on his cock, the flushed tip disappearing with every stroke of his hand, the slick noises of his precum overpowering the buzzing hum of the dildo inside of you. and then when neither of you can handle the tension any more, dying to feel each other's touch, after you've cum a couple of times and are all nice and sensitive for him, then and ONLY then will he finally put it in, quickly setting a pace to fuck your brains out like a wild animal <3 lovessss doggystyle or the speedbump position because then he's all up in your guts and ur moans/screams of pleasure are just music to his ears. definitely the type to go a little feral bc... yeah. so yeah that's freaky mode! but like blade he has a softer side to him UNLIKE blade it is still definitely there and more accessible... but that doesn't mean he exposes it to you just like that either. but yeah if he's feeling more vulnerable emotionally, especially right after he wakes up from a nightmare while you're groggily waking up next to him, he just needs comfort. you holding him and stroking his hair, telling him how he's safe and how much you love him. if you've been together for a while and he really trusts you, he might even cry. almost begs you to call him kakavasha instead of aventurine, and you oblige. and then as soon as his name leaves your lips, he's kissing you hard, gradually letting them become tender as you undress each other with the utmost amount of care. it's love that motivates him, from what you can feel from his fingers tracing your skin and how soft his lips press against yours. he lets out a quiet moan as he sinks into you and basks in your warmth for a bit, letting his arms now wrap around your frame tightly, holding you to himself as if you would disappear any moment. and you hug him too, draw patterns on his back, stroke his hair and hum as you tell him how much you love him, listening to the sound of his shaky breaths as you slowly raise your hips, sinking back down inch by inch to hear him hiss. at first, he would still refuse to let you see his face when you have sex like this, not until you gently coax him to look at you, and you see the crystalline tears already escaping from his eyes. he's definitely the type to cry during sex like this- something so soft and tender that it's overwhelming to him for so many reasons- the vulnerability of it all, how much you love and care for him written all over your face, the way you squeeze against him so perfectly. and then he buries his face in your chest as you keep whispering words of affirmation to him and he cums so fast, deep inside of you and then he stays even when he feels himself go soft. just because it feels nice. and he falls asleep just like that, clinging to you, the person he loves.

JING YUAN .ᐟ୨୧ another member of team lazy but pussydrunk (him and welt have permanent memberships lmfao) whenever the two of you fuck it usually starts with him making you work for it. involving either you getting off by grinding on his thigh or riding him, desperately throwing your weight back onto him to even simulate the feeling of his powerful thrusts- all in vain as he merely sits there, looking up at you with a maddening smile and just WATCHING you... what a creep <3 but yeah he loves loves loves seeing how worked up and whiny you get for him to do something, anything, just for him to do the exact opposite, placing two firm hands on your hips to effectively get you to stop, and you whine again from the loss of friction. and he'll merely smile, telling you how you're such a good girl for him, getti my off from watching you get so so close, just to do it over and over again. orgasm denial and edging really are his two best friends fr. so he's not really a strict dom but more of a tease, you get me? i think that YES he will use toys. really gets a kick out of vibrating panties or a vibrator inside of you that he can remote control <33 just really enjoys when you're in public trying to remain composed (what a creep <3) keeps u constantly stimulated all day, finally making it up to you when you both get back home, fucking you properly as you're on the verge of tears and ready to cum any second. hmmm hear me out on this but i think his favourite place to cum would be your back.. like yeah finishing inside is cool and all but pulling out and cumming all over your back just drives him CRAZY and ready for another round... as soon as you recover <3

LUOCHA .ᐟ୨୧ LORDDDDDD he's like jing yuan but even WORSE. he's dangerous too because in his eyes, it isn't him or a toy but him AND a toy. this man will have u in his lap thighs spread legs hanging over his knees so he can keep them open as he has one hand gripping your chin forcing to look at yourself in a mirror, the other hand holding a vibe to yr clit <33 every time your eyes start to roll back he'll do a light slap to your face, forcing you to hold eye contact with him through the mirror, his feline eyes dancing with mirth at your already fucked-out expression. and then when he's sure that his gaze is holding your attention, he'll let go of your face, letting his hand snaie downwards until his hands are collecting your slick on his fingers before pushing into you, pressing a sweet kiss to your cheek that contradicts how hard he's fingering you <3 squirting is not an achievement but the new standard with him!! that man is NOT relenting until you coat his arm and the floor (even the mirror) he really likes making you kiss him just after you cum- when your brain is foggy from the intensity of your orgasm, you can barely hear, let alone process what he's saying, and when u finally manage to connect your lips to his the kiss is just so sweet n sloppy, showing how worked up he is already <33 he's a little mean with it but you wouldn't have it any other way!! because that man knows what you need and will DELIVER. and he loves alllll of you. especially your pussy. and ass lol

DR RATIO .ᐟ୨୧ ok stay with me now cos this one's more of a scenario but!!! imagine that you haven't seen veritas in a while because you've both been busy but he messages you, saying how he'll finally be back soon!!! and ur just so excited that you can't contain it, and all those lonely nights are starting to tally up... your hands just don't do the trick any more and you finally cave, getting out your old reliable dildo to try and satiate your lust. trying your hardest to focus on veritas while you fuck yourself so that you'll be able to cum... pretending that it's his cock instead of some silicone... moaning out his name into your room with your eyes screwed shut to try trick your brain into believing that it's really him!! and it seems to work because you can feel that coil in you begin to tighten, and just when ur about to cum you feel a hand on top of yours, startling you out of your impending orgasm. and you open your eyes to see none other than the man who you had been fantasising about just now <3 and he's got this smirk on his face and a certain look in his eyes, and when you glance down you can see that he isn't exactly... unaffected from watching you earlier <33 i feel like he would degrade you a little, calling you such a stupid girl for needing to think of him just to even get close to cumming <333 and you'll whine and get embarrassed, trying to hide yourself with the covers, but deep down you know he's right so you peek at him from behind your lashes, batting them and begging him to help you as sweetly as you can. and how can he deny you when you're just so sweet and submissive for him? he'll be quick to take out his cock, slipping the head through your folds, letting it catch as it skims past your needy hole, letting the tip slap against your sensitive clit just to watch your whole body twitch as he chuckles to himself before bullying his cock into you. even after fucking yourself it's still a stretch, especially cos he has you in a mating press, his strong hands keeping your thighs pinned as he puts hisbweight behind his thrusts, really slamming into you until you're bouncing back against the mattress <33 a good hard fuck that hits all the right spots he needs to in order for you to cum HARD. but if he's feeling mean, he won't even oblige your request, instead being all smug and settling back on his haunches, goading you to keep going and make yourself cum without him because you're just so close, you can do it. watches your pathetic attempts to do so as you huff and beg him because you just can't without him <//3 and maybe if you beg hard enough he'll consider helping you out... even though it's just so entertaining to watch you keep trying. ironically enough, it's the way he calls you his sweet girl as he finally pushes into you that sends you over the edge more than any of your own touches did. and once you ride out that high, body no longer convulsing on his dick, he'll pull out of you just to flip you onto your stomach, then pull your hips up to meet his before fucking into you to make you really cum because of him this time <33

SAMPO .ᐟ୨୧ this man is MOST DEFINITELY an experimentalist!!! 1000% down for literally anything. you use toys on each other el oh el. the epitome of a switch. he'll top or bottom too, it's always a good time with him. definitely a freak. tbh i headcanon him as having a crazy oral fixation... if he's not sucking on your tits already then put your fingers in his mouth!! he'll have hearts swimming in his eyes, especially if you let them slide to the back of his throat until he gags and his eyes get all teary!!! definitely a sight to behold if u start fingerfucking his throat. or maybe just gag him with your panties, letting urself hear his muffled whines and moans as you finally free his cock and deepthroat him <33 oh god his whines and moans... get this man on twitter NEEOOOWWW. as a top he's definitely more goofy about it, not super strict. sex is about making sure you both feel good and just having a good time im his eyes.

GALLAGHER .ᐟ୨୧ ... this man... a certified freak. me personally im not into it but IF U LIKE ANAL THIS IS UR GUY 1000%%%. he def loves ur ass more than anything. the type to stick a finger in as he makes out with you or just let his finger tease the ring of muscle, circling it ever so slowly to feel u squirm while sat naked in his lap. when he eats you out he'll let his tongue drop a little lower to tease both of your holes. if u let him he'll eat your ass with GUSTO. and YES he's using toys on you you're not safe... buttplugs with the cute jewel on them and when you're in public he'll give your ass a slap or squeeze just to see your face change as you feel it press a little deeper into you... he'll have a vibrator fucking into your pussy as he's all up in your guts, laughing at the way you can't even form words right now. yeahhh he's a FREAK. oh and did i mention that he's an ass guy??

SUNDAY .ᐟ୨୧ ohohoho. this man has actual YEARS of pent up sexual frustration under his belt. his wings. whatever. he's a man who thrives off of control, and this is no exception in the bedroom. massive dom. both soft and hard. but more hard <3. really gets off on u calling him sir LAWLLL. lowkey i see him being into some real freaky bdsm stuff... cos hes got the whole sexually repressed catholic thing going on n all yknow. likes seeing u kneeled w your hands tied behind your back. you stripped naked while hes fully clothed and smiling so sweetly as he watches you try and get yourself off by humping his shoe. anything for that power imbalance with him hrrrrng. and if youre feeling a bit more bratty, touch his wings. preen them, blow air on them, even grip onto them HARD with your fingers and it'll get him all riled up. and then that sweet smiling facade will drop and youll see his eyes change into something a touch more feral as he pins u down and fucks u hard and properly. just to remind u who's really in control <3. the aftercare goes crazy, naturally. but then i also saw this post talking abt how hes a PEOPLE PLEASER and i agree 10000% so when he's feeling more soft, your pleasure is his greatest reward. a headrush mix of sweet praise and filthy degradation. telling you how you're a nasty bitch who's just so good for him... how you take him so well like the filthy slut you are.... and he's just so so composed during it all like an ANGEL EHFHWJFJE it makes ur head spin istg. yeah he's a freak in the sheets LOLL

IF YOU LIKED THIS, TRY ...... eat it 'til your teeth rot!

[ SMUT ] how the hsr men eat pussy!

alternatively, find my hsr masterlist here! ˖ ᡣ𐭩 ⊹ ࣪ ౨ৎ˚₊

[violetclarity]

How do you...decide what you actually want to do with your life?

[foxxsong]

.

[rubysparx]

Honestly I don't think I'm qualified to make this post, I just don't know if I can make coherent enough words man. But the thoughts are in there and I will try to articulate them. This is probably going to be mostly images though. anyway yeah KABRU POST.

A couple nights ago (at approximately 2:30am, lasting a little over half an hour) I had a bit of a moment about Kabru. That, too, was mostly images- most of what you see in this more concise post were presented then as well. I think my main points of the "moment" were about Kabru's trauma + self hatred, his autism and/or general otherness, and also a little labru if you'd like..

I think something easy to start with is I wanna point out Kabru's constant back and forth and conflicting opinions of demihumans and how, I believe, thats a reflection of how he goes back and forth on what he believes his purpose of living is- and the general worth of his own life. I've said it before and i've just kinda shown it in images; Kabru is "i think im a monster and it disgusts me" where Laios is "I know im a human and it disgusts me" (i could go more into the latter on another post)

the above are both from the world bible, with the left being from the section on kobolds and the right being from the section on Kuro specifically. Utaya was very near to the desert where most of the kobold population is, this is likely why Kabru is able to speak Kuro's language- he grew up around demihumans. (chapter 48 cover, kobold chapter in the world bible) I won't try to speak for how his mother or the rest of utaya felt about the kobolds but I can say that Kabru was very much othered as a child, as was his mother, purely for the way her son's (kabru) eyes looked.

I feel like its fair enough to say that both kabru and the kobolds were othered, and possibly for similar reasons (villager's seeing them as nonhuman, as monsters) and the fact that Kabru learned their language probably didn't help his case. I think his perception of kobolds (and all demihumans, subsequently himself, as he probably still views himself as nonhuman or not human enough.. deep down) was damaged by the Utaya incident. at 2:30am when I first started this ramble my main comment was that "had the utaya incident not happened kabru would have little reason to feel ashamed for his connection to monsters. and may have ended up similar to laios in that he couldve had otherkin swag" which is just a sort of silly way of saying Kabru could've learned to love the thought that he is possibly nonhuman or at least not hated himself so much for it.

in the original ramble I said, and quote, "he has been STALKING laios. laios is his hyperfixation to learn how he can ever be loved. he keeps going back and forth so harshly on wether or not he wants to kill Laios and he clearly sees his survival from utaya not as an unfortunate trauma [*] but as a necessary, deserved fate. a punishment for his mother's witchy sins, and for his sin of being non-human. to atone for it all, to apologize for being alive, he tries to better the lives of all humanity. He was set on his way to dethrone the governor of the island . do you understand? im going insane" *i also said somethings about the way he processes other people's traumas and not his own. He's able to understand and even help some people, but he struggles to process his own issues and see himself as worthy of love and life.

^some examples of Kabru being understanding of or helping others who have suffered greatly. I think its also worth mentioning that with Rin (called "Lynn" in that translation) he says "I wish there was a way to get her out of this" though he's insisted and pushed for himself to go into a dungeon;

In chapter 94, Mithrun says "The desire I had left wasn't revenge. All I wanted.. was for it to finish devouring me." and I don't feel like it's a stretch to say Kabru was in a similar situation. Mithrun sought out the demon with no plan on how to kill something like that because deep down he wanted it to end his (Mithrun's) own life, to finish the trauma it caused and kill him. I think Kabru went into the dungeon in part with the hopes that it'd kill him. That the same thing that destroyed Utaya and caused him so much trauma would just.. finish him.

I just think Kabru is a beautifully complex character, I have a lotta thoughts on him and I don't see nearly as many analysis posts for him than I do Laios (despite labru being such a popular ship)

there is no tldr for this post idk how to summarize it. do what you will with this collection of images. have fun. go crazy

fun fact the woman in the bottom left corner is his mother, she is labeled here as "witch"

[sweetnans]

Bakugo likes to pretend that he's not that into you. Well, that's only when you two have seen each other like what? two times? Because once he becomes a boyfriend, he's all in, go big or go home, and he obviously likes to go big.

But that's not the case. Yet.

You two met in a convention. You've heard from him a thousand times because being the number one hero doesn't go unnoticed. Bakugo introduced himself to you forced by his friends because they thought you were cute and completely his type, Kaminari pushed him to you and Bakugo never thought that after that bold act of his friend, he would be so grateful.

The second time you shared space and air with Dynamight was in a fight. A super wanted villain appeared on your quadrant and he went as a back-up (he knew that was your quadrant) his friend teased him all day and all week because he literally crossed the city to see you. He scolded them, but deep down (unconsciously) knew he was balls deep (not literally) into you.

Staring at his room ceiling he couldn't believe how whipped he was, he denied the feeling everytime he started to think of you. He had only seen you twice and now your pretty face won't come out of his head.

The sound of his phone's notification echoed in his room and he was quick to snatch the phone from his bedside table.

Hey Dynamight look at the cool pictures the press took of us. 😎

It was you. How did you even get his number?

He opened your photo before opening the one you sent him. You were holding a kitty and smiling like it was the best thing that ever happened to you. You were wearing a yellow sundress, and the landscape was full of beautiful flowers. You looked so gorgeous he thought he would die.

Sorry if I bothered you. I know you're sort of a snob, and I wanted to make sure that you saw the photos 🤡

Bakugo was so surprised about your interaction that he completely ignored the snob part.

He needed to reply asap. He didn't want you to believe that you were bothering him.

Great photos. I don't mind you talking to me.

He deleted and wrote it a thousand times before send it and that was the best he came up to.

You laughed in your place. His friend have told you how he acted and now you were just checking it for yourself.

I just need to get this out of my chest before I faint and then I'll leave you alone 🙂‍↕️ I just have to tell you that you look incredibly massive in those photos 😳 you got me feeling some type of way 👩‍🦯

The blood in his system rose to his cheeks and he suddenly felt extremely hot. You were something else.

After that text he was speechless. He needed to clear his mind before sending something that would lead you to never speak to him again or worse never want to see him again.

He cursed himself because he was trying so hard to pretend you didn't turn his world upside down after seeing you only two times, but now, after those texts, he was absolutely sure he was completely head over heels.

Do not edit or reupload my works elsewhere! All rights reserved.

[enhagvrl]

en- making you upset

a/n : first re- upload!! don't panic if you've already read this lol. it's me only. the second part will be posted soon. enjoy <33

heeseung

“ Well I’d be damned if my girlfriend was actually as crazy as people call her to be.” 

You have always been a quiet kid, keeping to yourself most of the time. But someone managed to watch you get into a fight with a stranger on the street. You were simply trying to defend yourself from being harassed by some perverted stranger when you kicked them too hard in the side of their stomach and broke one or two ribs.

Since then rumours had been going around the campus that you were a brutal person who beat up people which made you the target of other people’s gossip and just messed up your whole school life.

But at that time, Heeseung was the only one who really did not give in to those rumours -  he hung out with you and made you feel all sorts of giddy feelings you have never experienced with anyone else before. 

But right now was not the case, as you were left alone in your thoughts about Heeseung, maybe believing all those rumours about you too.

“ Baby, you okay?” heeseung asked, voice laced with concern over the sudden quiet atmosphere which took over the room within 5 seconds

“ huh? Yes? Yeah. I’m okay. Sorry, what were you saying?” you asked, your voice devoid of any sort of emotion which made heeseung wonder if he said something wrong.

“No you went quiet all of a sudden so just got worried. What’s on your mind? Tell me.” Hee said, turning his whole body towards you to make it known that you have his entire attention now. 

Not being able to take in the sudden change in the atmosphere, and the unawareness of heeseung to the effect his words had on you, you muttered a quick “ sorry. I’ll be back.” and rushed out of the house leaving behind a confused heeseung who did not get a chance to run after you.

jay

“ as if anyone would be willing to listen to your constant chatter” 

You were the chatterbox friend who never knew of a surprise or event, until you were at the place. This led you to have trust issues with everyone and also be insecure about yourself. Over the years, you practised how to keep your mouth shut and not start yapping at any given occasion. That’s when you met Jay, the only person who never hated you for yapping his ears out - he was always sitting there with a small smile on his face listening to every single word coming out of your mouth. You always thought he was the one for you, and that he loved your continuous random talks. But now you were doubting that, that maybe you had been annoying him all this time and he did not want to tell you that just to not hurt your feelings.

You got quiet as you continued stirring the soup, and the sudden silence did not go unnoticed by Jay. He gave you a side eye trying to figure out what happened, but seeing your expressionless face he just concluded that you were trying to focus on cooking. 

Later that evening, both your guys' parents came over for a monthly catch up and meeting with each other. The night went very quickly, with everyone enjoying the evening with each other - everyone except you. Jay was quick to catch on though, noticing you had not uttered 10 proper words since you guys were preparing the dinner. 

After your parents said their goodbyes for the night, the house again went quiet - the both of you cleaning up. Jay tried coming close to you but you would only get away from him to throw away the garbage or clean up some soup stain on the table.

“Baby, is something bothering you? You have not even opened your mouth for the last three hours. You know you can tell me anything, right? I’m always ready to hear you out.” he said, blocking your way by standing in front of you and trapping you in a corner.

You could only scoff at his statement. Pushing him out of the way, you went to do your night routine and took your pillows and an extra blanket, making yourself a comfortable sleeping palace in the living room like kids do, except this one was clearly not for playing. 

Jay could only watch you silently, and breathed a frustrated sigh realising he might have done or said something and that you needed some time to yourself. He went back to your guys’ bedroom - going over all his words and events of the day to figure out what he did wrong, sleeping far away from him. 

jake

   “You can’t even walk properly without stumbling over yourself. What makes you think you can play soccer?”

Being the girl who grew up with a father who regularly watched motor races and other sports on the television, you had always loved playing sports and being active on the field. You were aware there were a few things you cannot be good at but it did not hurt to try them out, did it? Well certainly it did not before those words left your boyfriend’s mouth. 

“Huh?” was all you could let out, trying to clean the dirt on your knees you got from falling due to your open shoe laces. 

Jake only scoffed in return and rolled the ball along with him, going over to the goal post and scoring a goal. You could only watch him, sitting on the field. After a quick two minutes of just registering his words in your mind, you also let out a sarcastic smirk and got up from the ground and walked towards the benches. 

“Ay ay, were you not going to score a goal right now? Let’s gaur! The bet on the ice cream still stands, you know that right?” Jake uttered excitedly, running up to you and passing the ball towards you. 

“Not anymore. I’m tired. Let’s go back, I’ll get us the ice cream.” You said, getting ready to leave the field, leaving Jake all confused with his lips pulled into a small pout and his eyes big with confusion and worry on your sudden change of demeanour. He could only watch silently, as you packed up your towels and shoes, swinging the bag on your shoulders and walking towards the exit, not sparing a glance behind to see if the puppy-looking boy was coming along or not.

sunghoon

 “ let me freaking breathe for a moment now, will you.” 

You had one issue - too much outgoing. You were always up for adventures and loved travelling. You could not sit in one place for any longer than a month and always needed to experience something new and thrilling. On the contrast, Sunghoon, not being very fond of always being outside, still felt happy to spend time with you - whatever and wherever it may be.

You were telling Sunghoon about how you had booked a ticket to this wonderful bungee jumping place next week for you guys since he had just gotten back from a tour and you guys finally had some time to spend together.

 “ I mean we could book a pretty lodging somewhere and just stay indoors-” “ can’t we just stay at our own house for a second, damnit. Why do we even have a roof over our heads if we aren’t staying in it for five seconds also.” he interrupted your sentence before you could even complete it. 

Hearing this, you realised you might have just crossed the line. Saying these words, Sunghoon turned towards his side - going to get the much needed sleep and rest he yearned for so long after god knows how many months of those tiring concerts and travel. 

You could only look at his back, thoughts flooding your mind and self doubt creeping up on you. You decided to hit bed on the sofa itself - making a mental note about cancelling the trip and spending bonding time with your boyfriend. 

sunoo

 “ as if anyone would believe you.”

Since your childhood, you were the rebel kid who would always lie to her parents and friends about so many things - partying outside, hanging out with certain people et cetera. This led you to not develop many deep bonds with people. Your life was absolutely dark, until this huge and cute ray of sunshine came in and changed the whole trajectory of your being - kim sunoo. He was the one who knew that you were more than just a liar and traitor people assumed you to be. The years of mistreatment you got from people and deep down those insecurities which had always eaten you from inside seemed to disappear the moment sunoo walked into your life. Which led you to go blank hearing these words from his mouth.

“ You know I would really like to see you try and win the trust of all the people around you. Since, you had acted like such a headache in your teenage years.” he said, going back to making silly tiktoks for his fan following. 

You knew he meant it as a joke as it is very normal for the both of you to have regular banter exchanged. But maybe, this time you could not take it as a joke. You felt those ingrown doubts getting out from your gut and spreading through your body. 

“Yeah…right…I was…a headache for sure back then.” you let out slowly, taking deep breaths. Not bothering to hear his reply, you quickly got up from the floor, saying in a rushed tone -

“Don't you think the weather today is so hot? I’ll get us some mint choco. Wait here.” saying this you disappeared into the kitchen downstairs, gulping down a big glass of cold water to calm yourself. 

jungwon

 “ What do you know about leading a group anyways?”

You had been chosen as the troop leader for a camping trip your class would be going to for a week. You did not have major doubts on your skills as a leader, being an elder sibling but the problem was your class - the most mischievous and notorious class in your whole batch. If they did not cause any problems today, they would surely cause double the problems tomorrow to make up for tomorrow. The whole school knew it, even the teachers, that this one class was absolutely hopeless when it came to controlling them. Which brings you to your boyfriend, Jungwon - the only person you can get some advice from regarding leading a big group. 

“And you know, there's this guy named Wooyoung and I swear he’s not even human. Like, why would you go around biting people you don’t like?! I’m so scared about what to do with him when I cannot even get into his five metre radius……” and you went on about the different troublemakers and how you think you could handle them for a week, when those words of Jungwon made you pause.

“.....what do you mean not knowing how to lead a group?” you questioned, sitting up straight from your lying position on the bed, feeling irritation creeping up on you.

“No, I mean, I get it. You’re the elder sibling of your house so you kinda have some idea when it comes to handling babies but of course you’re gonna be inexperienced when it comes to leading a big group of grown ass adults.” he said, very casually, continuing to reply to his fans on weverse.

“maybe you should pass on the duty to someone else you know. Someone more capable of being a leader and someone who will be taken seriously by the people.” 

There. The damage was done. 

“So you think I'm some sort of pushover who people don’t take seriously? Huh. I'm starting to doubt if YOU take me seriously or not. All those efforts were for nothing.” 

Saying this you grabbed your hoodie and cellphone, heading towards the door. Ignoring maeumi’s barking, you went out - jungwon’s words replaying in your head making you breathe a sigh and look up towards the trees swaying furiously in the wind, indicating it was going to rain soon. 

niki

“ Of course you wouldn’t be able to get in with that body of yours”

You had been trying real hard auditioning to get into this big dance team in your city which will be performing in SDC, one of the biggest dance competitions out there. But no matter how many routines you showed them, they still did not approve of you joining the team and told you to stay back in the studio. You were clearly aware that the reason they were not taking you in despite your excellent dancing skills was because of your body. You did not have a slim dancer body as other dancers have and SDC heavily depended on judging the figures of the dancers participating. But in hopes of changing that, you were constantly trying. 

“Oyi, you good?” you snapped out of your trance, hearing your name being called. There stood Niki, breathing heavily and the track humble by kendrick lamar now softly playing in the background. 

“What are you thinking about?” he asked a second time, noticing your eyes were distant and how you stopped rambling about how unfair the world is to people like you. 

“....yeah…yeah yeah I’m fine…nothing…just kind of zoned out.” 

“ yah don’t think too much about it. You couldn’t get in, you could not. That’s fine. You just have to work on your body more. You know competitions these days heavily depend on how well it looks executed and for that you are required to have a perfect body, as they call it.” he says, turning up the volume again and getting back to practise for his artist of the month performance. “Don’t ponder about it too much, you will get into future competitions.” 

Instead of taking his constructive criticism as motivation like you always do, you felt tears welling up and ran out of the practice room. The music had stopped and quick footsteps could be heard behind you, but you ran without looking back.

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