#drawing instead of studying for an exam i have in two days

[aggressiveguitarnoises]

What a day huh?

[mypoisonedvine]

𝖇𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖉𝖘𝖕𝖔𝖙𝖘 | professor!jonathan crane x batgirl!reader

𝖘𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞 | it can be difficult, living a double life: spending your days as a scholarship student at gotham university, and your nights as batgirl, the legendary heroine, fighting alongside batman and robin. though it proves to take a toll on you mentally and physically, flunked term papers and missed lectures will be the least of your problems when you encounter the scarecrow somewhere in the shadowy alleyways of gotham...

𝖜𝖔𝖗𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖙 | 7k

𝖜𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘 | NONCON SMUT (18+ only; violent/rough sex, use of fear toxin, degradation, semi-public sex/exhibitionism, bondage), professor/student dynamic (therefore implied age gap), some angst and depiction of ptsd/aftermath, reader is dating robin/tim drake

“And so,” Professor Crane continued, looking towards the class from the board, chalk in hand, "this triggers the fear response, and all that comes with it.  You're probably familiar with the symptoms of fear: heart rate increase, cold sweat, overall heightened arousal."

A few giggles could be heard at that, and he rolled his eyes.

"Not that sort of arousal, necessarily," he frowned.

Everyone else just brushed off the childish humor of the moment, but you narrowed your eyes, getting a sense that the word necessarily was doing a lot of heavy lifting in that sentence.

He returned to his lecture, drawing lines in chalk over his crude diagram of the human brain, explaining how each area of the brain contributed to fear and the fight-or-flight response.  As he spoke, you re-read the handout he’d given today— and you chewed on your lip absent-mindedly as you reviewed the bibliography.

"Dr. Crane?" you raised your hand, interrupting his lecture mid-sentence.  "I had a question about some of the studies you reference here."

"Yes?" he returned, turning to face you with a slightly confused expression.

"Well you cite a paper out of Berkeley from 2002, to support the conclusion that exposure therapy is the best response to aggressive phobias— however, if you actually read the paper—"

"I read the paper, Miss," he interrupted sternly.

"Then, if you actually understood the paper," you continued, a few students gasping and laughing softly at your insubordination, "then you would see that the conclusions indicate the perceived decrease in fear response comes at the expense of long-term stability.  Don't you think that negates any positive implications?"

The silence in the room was tense: everyone was waiting for how he would respond to your critique.  Instead, he just smiled at you slightly.  "I think you may have more context for how research is conducted, and reevaluate your conclusions, when you get a chance to organize your own research— in about a decade."

"Actually, Professor, I'll be leading my own experiment this quarter," you corrected, just as he was about to turn away from you and keep lecturing.  "I'm the recipient of the Wayne Enterprises Collegiate Scholarship— which pays for my education here and also comes with a fifty thousand dollar research grant."

“Ah,” he said, bitterness dripping from his tone as he set his hands on the desk and leaned forward a bit.  “May I ask what topic you hope to explore with your research?”

“Crime,” you explained, “and criminal behavior.”

“Hm,” he nodded, frowning slightly in an impressed sort of way, taking his weight off the desk.  “And it doesn’t bother you that you’re here studying psychology?”

You lowered your brow, confused by his question.  “I’m sorry?”

“Criminology is a subfield of sociology, which is related to but distinct from psychology,” he explained.

“Would you recommend that I switch majors, Doctor?” you asked simply.

“Well, it’s no secret that you’ve set the curve on our last two exams,” Dr. Crane smiled, tilting his head slightly.  “So, no— I think I’d rather keep you here.”

You straightened up slightly, taken aback by his wording.

“Plus, while you’re still in my department,” he continued, “I have a better chance of talking some sense into you.”

With that, he returned to teaching, and you noticed how the other students were watching you before you sighed and tried to listen to the rest of class.

~

You caught up with him on a long stretch of hallway, just as he stepped up to his office door.  “Professor!” you got his attention, and he turned to you with a slightly smug look as he held his hands together.

“Ah, yes,” he greeted, “I see you’re here to apologize for how you spoke to me in class today?”

You knew he didn’t actually expect that, he knew better after having you under him for the last two quarters— um, so to speak.  “Just as soon as you do,” you offered with a smirk in return, shifting your weight on your hip.

That was what moved your button-down slightly, and his eyes drifted down to your neck— when they did, confusion and concern suddenly painted his expression. “My,” he gasped a little, pulling on the collar of your shirt with one finger to expose a healing scrape on your chest; his fingertip brushed over your skin and the golden chain of your necklace, and you jumped away slightly.  “How’d you get that?”

“It’s nothing—” you blurted out, blinking quickly, “I tripped, on campus, actually.”

“That wonky step up to the Commons?” he assumed.  “I’ve filed two complaints about that loose brick…”

“Yes,” you agreed quickly, smiling.  “Yeah, I wasn’t looking where I was going, and I didn’t catch myself well while holding my books—”

“Hm,” he nodded back, “that’s a shame.  A girl as smart as you, forgetting the Commons building doesn’t have brick steps— or steps at all, in fact.”

You swallowed thickly, glancing away. 

“You sure were eager for an explanation, though,” he smiled.  “How’d you really get such a nasty scrape?  It does look like concrete, but I’m guessing it didn’t happen on campus—”

“It’s no matter,” you assured.

“It wasn’t that boyfriend of yours, was it?” he pressed.  “Mr. Drake, as I recall?”

“Wha— no!” you gasped.

“He’s not your boyfriend?”

“Well, he is,” you explained, “but he didn’t—”

“You know you can tell me anything, right?” Crane offered, lowering his voice slightly.  

“Of course,” you sighed, “but there’s nothing to tell.  Things are fine with Tim, I promise.” 

“He shared your interest in criminal studies, didn’t he?” Professor Crane recalled.  “Clearly, he didn’t share your scholarly aptitude, though, seeing as he’s dropped out.”

“H-he was smart enough,” you justified, “he left because of stress.”

“Ah,” the Professor nodded, “and he doesn’t take that stress out on you at all?”

“C’mon, Professor, Tim’s a good person,” you promised.

“I’m inclined to agree,” Crane replied, “but it’s the ones that act the kindest that have the most to hide, isn’t it?”

You knew there was another meaning to that statement, but there were so many possibilities that you couldn’t settle on one.

“You understand that if I suspect anything, I’m required to alert our student wellness services,” he reminded you.  “They’ll have a counselor reach out to you—”

“Listen, Dr. Crane— I didn’t come here to speak to you about my personal life,” you reminded him, “I wanted to ask you about my performance in the class so far, in your opinion.”

He paused before sighing in relent.  “I’m a little concerned, actually,” he admitted, “about your most recent paper.”

He pulled it from the folder under his arm and handed it back to you— covered in red ink.  You blinked at him, biting your lip in confusion.  “I thought these wouldn’t be returned until—”

“I worked on yours first,” he explained quickly, even though that explanation only brought more questions than answers.  “It’s still very strong, but it’s not what I expect from you at this point.  It feels rushed.”

Rushed— yeah, I remember this one.  I wrote it all the night it was due because I spent the three days before recovering from that fight with Falcone’s thugs at the docks—

“I’ll let you rewrite it,” he offered, “if you can get it back to me before I return the rest of your classmates’ work.”

You laughed a little, looking at the paper in front of you, and Crane knitted his brows together.  “You know, Professor, sometimes I can’t tell if I’m your favorite student, or your most hated.”

He smiled a little, glancing down briefly at the floor in a sort of self-effacing way.  “I don’t have favorites,” he assured, unconvincingly.  “You’re not my best student, or my worst— you’re an entirely different kind of student.  You’re nothing like those other… juvenile, moronic co-eds looking in the exact wrong place for an easy A.”

Your eyes widened a little, seeing the way he let a little irritation— disdain, really— paint his tone.  He snarled a bit as he spoke, his nostrils flaring; like he was holding it back, how much resentment he really had for your classmates.  

As quickly as it came, he seemed to shake it off, and then he smiled again… but it was tight, and forced, you could see that just as easily.  “You challenge me,” he finished quickly.  “I appreciate that as much as I detest it.”

You smiled back, somewhat genuinely despite the icky feeling that suddenly wiggled in your stomach.  “I suppose I feel the same way,” you admitted.

He opened his mouth, hesitating slightly, before tilting his head the other way and starting over.  “Could you come into my office for a minute?” he asked suddenly, a strange glimmer in his eyes behind the thin silver glasses.  “I’d like to show you my latest work— I think you’ll find it quite intriguing…”

He reached into his pocket, pulling out a ring of keys and started to unlock his office door, and you didn’t feel too excellent about it.

Just then, a group of students walked by, and you heard them talking amongst each other as one looked at a text message on her phone.  “Oh my god,” one said as she explained to those around her, “my friend’s at the bank right now— she said someone’s holding up the place…”

“What?” another student asked, and you tilted your head a bit to hear them better.

“Yeah, the one on Main and 57th?  The police aren’t there yet— she said they have guns…” 

Your heart started to race.  Sounds like a job for Batgirl.

Crane was in his own world, though, about to open the door.  “Maybe I can even convince you to change some of your conclusions about the study of fear,” he posited.

You stepped back, motivated to leave just as much by a strange suspicion of Professor Crane as the opportunity to stop the nearby bank robbery.  “I-I have to go,” you said, before you’d thought of a good excuse— and that hadn’t gone well for you last time, but hopefully he wasn’t going to quiz you on campus architecture again to trip you up.

He looked confused, a little sad even, as he turned to you again.  “This won’t take long,” he promised, “I’d just like to show you—”

“Sorry,” you blurted out as you kept backing up, “I gotta… you know, um… buy tampons.”

Hoping something that awkward would get him to stop asking questions, you turned on your heel and darted off down the hall, looking for the best way off campus and to a secluded spot where you could pull your Batgirl get-up out of the false compartment in your bag and get to work.

~

“I don’t like you going out there alone,” Bruce said flatly, not looking up from his hands clasped in his lap.

“Wow, really?” you rolled your eyes, feigning surprise.  “News to me.”

“You’re too young, and it’s dangerous,” he continued anyway.

“Doing all the greatest hits tonight, huh?” you smirked.  “Next you’ll say you need to keep up your identity better, study hard so no one suspects you and then finish it off with don’t touch the Batmobile.”

He sighed and shook his head.  “You can touch it, you just can’t drive it.”

“Right,” you agreed flatly, sighing as you adjusted in your spot on the couch.  You’d taken up shop here in the Wayne Manor private library: something about your interaction with Professor Crane yesterday made you want to study off-campus for the afternoon…

You knew Bruce had a point about working alone— you didn’t really want to be alone, you were certainly safer when you had Batman by your side.  The problem was that you were too safe… Bruce protected you so well that he hindered you; you’d accused him of wanting you to just stay behind and patch him up after fights rather than actually helping.  He denied it, obviously, but actions speak louder than words— and there was such a difference in the way he treated you and Robin was obvious.

In fact, that itself had driven a wedge between you and your boyfriend— one of many reasons Bruce had implored you both not to get involved in that way, but it was sort of unavoidable.  You can only do such high intensity, high pressure work alongside someone for so long before the tension is too much to bear… 

Then again, that very tension that made your relationship with Tim threatened to break it, and you knew that— you felt that, even now, as he looked at you with a sympathetic sort of stare.  You cleared your throat and focused on your book again.

“Please don’t go out without us again,” Tim asked— softer, sweeter, lacking that father-figure-sternness Bruce was always trying to muster.

“I think the people in that bank are pretty happy that I did,” you replied with a snarky smile.

“We were on our way—” Bruce began.

“It was a one man job!” you insisted.

“There were seven men on that heist team— and two more parked outside,” Bruce explained, getting more frustrated as this discussion continued.  “It doesn’t matter.  We work as a team.”

“Except when you go out alone,” you reminded him.

“I’ve been doing this longer,” he explained, standing up, “I’ve been doing it better, and I’ve been doing it on my own since you were still in high school.”

“Then why did you take me in?” you returned sharply, knitting your brows together in confusion and frustration.  “Why did you train me, why did you bring me here and tell me the truth?”

“Because I saw your potential,” he answered as he began to walk away, “not because you’re ready to save the whole fucking world by yourself.”

You shook your head in frustration— almost disbelief, except of course he would do this— as Bruce shut the door behind him.  Conversation didn’t go his way, he just left— that was normal.  Ironic, for a man who interrogated criminals on the street almost daily.

“He’s right,” Tim informed you after a pregnant pause, and you glared at him.

“Would you excuse me?  I have to study,” you explained sharply as you motioned to the textbooks and notepads laid out on the table, as you’d had them before you were interrupted by these two, “because apparently the best thing Batgirl can do is not be Batgirl.”

“Hey,” Tim sighed, “he doesn’t mean it like that… he just wants you to keep focusing on your studies, that’s all.”

“I just think it’s funny—” you began.

“I bet it’s not gonna be very funny,” Tim noticed with a frown.

“— that Bruce thinks it’s so important that I keep my grades up so nobody knows what I’m doing at night— so nobody knows that I’m not getting any goddamn sleep— but you got to drop out and that apparently wasn’t going to make anybody suspicious?” you noticed.  “You know, I had a professor ask me about you today— wondering what was up with you leaving so suddenly.  Why is nobody worried about that?”

“We worry about you because we care about you,” he explained.

You tossed your books aside, standing up to face Tim properly.  “That’s bullshit,” you spat.

“You think I don’t care about you, seriously?” he asked.

“I know you care about me, but you don’t respect me,” you explained, “neither of you do.  You two go off and do what you want, you’d rather me be your nurse than actually be out there— when you know damn well that you need me!”

“I need you,” Tim promised, “in so many ways.  That’s why I can’t let anything happen to you—”

“Well, things need to happen to me sometimes!  Isn’t that what life is, things happening to you?!” you laughed exasperatedly.  “I mean, shit, why do I go to school at all?  Why don’t you guys just lock me at the top of Wayne Tower and I’ll never ever leave and you can just climb up my hair when you wanna come visit!”

“Christ,” Tim groaned, “you are so fucking ridiculous sometimes— what are you trying to prove?  Why do you need to be out there every night beating up bad guys, whether Bruce tells you to or not?”

Instead of answering that, you simply accused: “He obviously likes you better than me.”

“Is that really what this is about?  You want Bruce to like you?!” Tim scoffed.  “Are you that shallow?”

“I want him to trust me!” you clarified.  “I want him to understand what I’m capable of!”

“You know what you’re capable of,” he replied, grabbing your shoulders.  “I know.  Is that not enough?”

You let out a long breath, looking down at the floor.

“I love you,” Tim sighed— but it didn’t sound very sweet when he said it like that, it sounded sad.

“I love you too,” you replied instinctively, but it felt oddly hollow leaving your lips.

“Please,” he breathed as he pressed his forehead to yours, “please stay safe.  You’re stronger than me, you can take a lot more than I can.”

You were about to ask him what he meant by that, since you both knew he was physically stronger and more resilient than you, walking away from fights that could’ve put you in a stretcher.  But before you could ask, he spoke again.

“My heart can only take so much.”

But that only proved your point, though you didn’t tell him out loud: that what him and Bruce wanted you to do had nothing to do with your strength, and everything to do with their weakness.

~

In your defense, you took the night off.

But the next night, you had to get out there— Bruce and Tim told you to stay behind so Batman and Robin could go save the day, and you?  You were holding down the fort, keeping the couch warm.  What a fucking waste; there was more evil in this city than two men could purge— there was more for you to do.  As tempting as it was to meet them at the rendezvous location they’d figured out and try to help clear out the gangsters there buying an illegal weapons shipment, you knew that would just lead to the same fight again.  This time, the plan was to go out, kick some criminal ass, come back, and leave Bruce none the wiser.

You scanned police radios patiently, waiting for just the right thing— small enough to fix on your own, big enough to matter.  You wished, sometimes, that you had less to choose from…

Units respond, units respond — 10-79 reported at West Main and 88th.

Bomb threat.  That felt manageable, and you were pretty handy with defusal in case that threat had any credibility.  You turned off the radio and stood up, looking down over the city from your vantage point on a highrise fire escape.  It was beautiful, in its grimy Gotham way: a light rainfall coated everything in a fuzzy static like old film; it made the concrete reflect the neon lights a little clearer, the whole skyline sort of slick and steamy.  

Running and jumping to the next roof, you made a path to your destination and navigated the city unseen, like any good Bat-person would.

You were nearly there when you stopped on a roof above an abandoned manufacturing plant— well, that’s the thing, it wasn’t as abandoned as you thought.  There was a glass sunroof, and even though it was dark and rainy, the light inside brought your attention to a group of men inside.  Not to profile or anything, but 4 bald guys with guns standing around is usually a good sign that someone’s up to no good…

Trying to get a better look at what was going on inside, you carefully lifted one of the glass panels and slipped inside, sneaking around the metal scaffolding as the sound of the rain was muffled and replaced with distance, echoing voices.

You crouched in the rafters, watching with narrowed eyes as the group of men faced against a figure you couldn’t make out with the shadows and pillars in the way.

“So, are we good for this deal, or what?” the leader of the group asked.

A modulated, deeper voice answered: “This is half of what we agreed.”

“My team had some… road bumps, trying to bring this to you,” the man explained, stepping forward slightly.  “We lost some of the compound.  This is what we’re offering, take it or leave it.”

“I’ll take it,” the shadowy figure agreed.  “How much for what’s left?”

“The same price we discussed.”

“For half the amount?  How does that work?”

“It’s a flat rate,” the smuggler— that’s what he must have been, right?— explained with a smug smirk.  “In fact, I should charge you more— call it hazard pay, for what my men had to go through to get this here.”

“I see,” the deeper voice replied.  “How about this: I kill all of you, and take it.”

Your eyes widened; isn’t this guy alone?  He’s sure got some balls…

The group of men paused before beginning to laugh.  “You?” the leader repeated.  “This skinny guy in the suit is gonna kill all of us?”

“I can do worse than that— I’ll make you beg for me to kill you.”

Feeling the tension of this discussion reach its breaking point, you realized you needed to intervene now: leaning over to make sure you had the right spot under you, you took the grappling hook off of your belt and pointed it down.

Firing it with a metallic whooshing sort of sound, the device grabbed one of the men and yanked him up into the shadows of the ceiling with you.  Everyone on the ground looked up in shock and fear, pointing their guns aimlessly into the darkness.  Before he could even really react to what had just occurred, you dropped the man back down— onto one of his friends, of course, which incapacitated them both but saved him from a much worse fate than if he’d landed on that concrete warehouse floor.

“What the fuck?” the leader of the group yelled as he tried to fire indiscriminately up at you— but you were already running along the steel beam, following one of the men as he tried to make a dash for the exit.

A blast from your long-distance taser gun brought him to the ground instantly, and as the last one left searched for the source of your attacks, you jumped down to the ground just behind him, landing in a crouched position.  As soon as he’d turned around to face you, you’d grabbed a loose metal pipe from nearby and hit him over the head with an oddly-satisfying bong noise.

You knew the other man was still somewhere in the dark nearby, and you called out for him: “Whoever you are, stop hiding in the shadows: that’s kinda my thing,” you informed him.

He stepped forward in the cool, gray light: a man in a torn and tattered suit, with a burlap mask that had massive stitches like scars.  Batman had just warned you about this guy, what was his name again?

"My," he purred with pleasant shock, his voice clearly deepened electronically by something in that sack on his head.  "If it isn't Batgirl.  Nice outfit, very… shiny."

"Yours looks pretty rough," you noticed.

He shrugged.  "It does the job."

You smiled back, remembering finally who you were dealing with.  "Not with me.  I'm not scared of you, Scarecrow."

"You will be," he promised.

You swung first, a roundhouse kick right at his head, but he ducked and came back up at you— he tried to grab you but you slipped away.

Instead of going after you again, he ran— grabbed one of the suitcases off of the palette nearby, whatever this ‘shipment’ was, and bolted for the door into the alleyway.  You almost laughed, impressed that he thought he could outrun you, but then again this was the guy who threatened to kill four armed men straight to their face.

You chased him right out the door, but as you dashed into the alley behind the manufacturing plant— the one that faced the northern street— you learned a moment too late that he hadn’t run at all, but was waiting for you there.

He sprayed something in your face, and you coughed as a cloud of vapor filled your lungs.  You assumed it was pepper spray at first, but it didn't burn— actually, it smelled a little sweet, sort of herbal.  But the effects were almost instantaneous, the pounding in your chest and the sinking feeling in your gut, the world spinning around you.

The fear response: heart rate increase, cold sweat, overall heightened arousal.

Instantly you felt old memories rushing in— awful, horrifying ones, and even worse than you remembered them.  For a moment, there was fear with no real object, just the feeling… until he grabbed your face and forced you to look at him, at the wicked mask that seemed impossibly close— that seemed like it could swallow you whole.  You screamed, trying to turn away or shut your eyes or something, but nothing assuaged the terror.

"Please," you sobbed.  "Make it stop!  Please!"

“Nothing can stop it now,” his voice returned— even rougher and darker than before, the deep bass of it making you shiver.  “This is who you are.  Give in to the fear.”

If nothing else, he had a point that fighting it wasn’t proving very useful— but giving in meant letting the world collapse in on you, letting the darkness pull you back… the darkness you’d fought so hard to make into an ally was becoming your enemy again.  

He grabbed your mask and tugged it away; even overwhelmed with primal terror, enough logic remained for you to reach up and try to cover your face.

But he simply grabbed your hands and shoved them away.  You heard a laugh behind that horrible mask, just before he suddenly took it off.

The toxin changed his face, too— his smile was wider and his teeth sharper, his eyes totally black— and you couldn't recognize him at first.  Only when he addressed you by name did you finally put it together; "Professor Crane?" you realized with a horrified gasp.

"I imagine you haven't finished rewriting that paper yet?"

"Oh god," you sobbed, "you— you're— how can you do this?"

You struggled against him again, but he held you back effortlessly.  “I said I liked you because you’re a challenge,” he remembered with a laugh.  “But out here, you’re no challenge at all.  Just a stupid little girl in a mask.”

He slapped you hard across the face, making you stumble even more as you lost your balance, colliding with the damp black asphalt.

He descended onto you, turning you on your back when you tried to hide your face in your arm as an escape from the terrifying visions.  “I’ve been waiting for a chance to put you in your place,” he admitted with a growl as he started to pull your armored clothes off of you roughly.  “You act a little too fearless for my liking… good to know it’s all an act.”

You cried, shaking and flailing beneath him, but you couldn’t actually put up a fight like this— the darkness throbbed around you, shadows reaching out to pull you into their abyss.  “Please,” you begged again, “no!  Stop, please!”

You weren’t even sure yourself if you were talking to him or to the hallucinated, anthropomorphized energy in the dark, but neither stopped.  He struggled at times to get your clothes off, they weren’t exactly designed to come off quickly but you shuddered violently from the cool night air when your chest was exposed.  You heard a deep growl from him, and you whimpered loudly as his hands ran over your skin.  “What are you so scared of?” he asked, sounding amused— but in your mind, those hands were claws that could shred you to pieces at any moment, and you breathed so fast that your chest just spasmed and quaked.  “I think you’ve been needing this for a while…”

He roughly turned you onto your stomach, face down against the street, and started to tug down your pants.  You were too scared to even beg him to stop, to try to bargain or reason with him— you just shuddered and cried, hiding your face and hoping for relief from the dread.

He smacked you on your bare ass, once it was exposed, and chuckled to himself at your whine in response.  The next thing you heard was the sound of a belt opening, a zipper unzipped…

Was it the toxin that made you afraid he would rip you in half, when he pressed his erection against your thigh?  Or was that just common sense?

You grimaced when you heard him spit into his hand, but it fell into a whining cry as he pushed his tip against your opening.  With your pants only down to your knees, you couldn’t even spread your legs at all, making you feel even more like there was no chance he could fit.  The sick, anxious fear felt a little different now— maybe not as strong, but mostly just something new… something deeper and subtler and heavier.  It wasn’t visions of monsters or memories of suffering, it was just this inevitable violation and the sureness that you were completely helpless.

He pushed his hips forward sharply, making you scream out and instantly reach back to try to grab his hips and push them away.  He ignored it and kept going forward with a low groan.  “Mm, you can take it,” he promised gruffly.  “Fucking take it.”

You cried as he put a hand on your shoulders, keeping you pressed down painfully into the ground, as he slid the rest of the way in.

It stung, it stretched you in an awful way and went far too deep… but you were wet, you could feel it.  Overall heightened arousal… not that sort of arousal, necessarily.  He obviously noticed as well, growling a bit.  “You like this, hm?” he accused.

“N-no,” you managed to slur, but it was hard to even breathe with his weight pressing you down.  You pushed back harder against his thighs through his undone trousers, but he growled and grab your hand to pin it down above your head.  He brought the other up beside it, and quickly pulled his belt out from the loops to tie around your wrists.  “Professor,” you pleaded under your breath, feeling your warm tears mix with the cold rain on the ground.

But he was already inside you, it was too late for that— and with your hands conveniently out of the way, he breathed heavy as he started to pull back and shove back in.

There was no build-up after that, he just fucked you as hard and fast as he wanted with no regard for how you cried and struggled under him.  He grabbed your hair and forced your head back awkwardly as you sobbed.

“Say my name,” he ordered, apparently irritated by the title of ‘Professor’ — but you didn’t know for sure if he wanted to be addressed as Jonathan or Scarecrow, and you feared the consequences if you chose incorrectly.  

Still, you blurted out the first thing that came to mind: “J-Jonathan,” you spat out hoarsely, and he grinned happily before dropping you back onto the ground.  You struggled against the belt around your wrists— not actually expecting to get out of it, and not having any plan if you did, just mainly out of instinct.  All it did was dig the sharp edge of the leather into your skin, making you cry harder.

It rocked you back and forth on the ground, those rough thrusts— the friction inside you was hot and fast, and each time he slammed all the way in, you heard the clapping of skin on skin and felt his tip ram against the deepest places inside you.  You didn’t even realize it was possible to be bruised inside like that, but you knew you would be by the end of this.

He didn’t slow down, really, but he changed his rhythm slightly and found an angle to go even just a bit deeper into you, until you whined pathetically with every pump into you.  It seemed like the toxin was wearing off, in that you weren’t seeing things anymore, but there was still obviously a sick feeling in your stomach, and an unreliable beating in your chest, and a deep throbbing in your ears.

“You’re getting even wetter,” he noticed with a low chuckle, and you whimpered as you hoped not to have to acknowledge that.  “Fucking soaking me— poor girl, I don’t think you can help it…”

At least it made this hurt a little less, but no amount of wetness could prevent him from holding your hips painfully tight and fucking you so forcefully it seemed hateful.  You whined loudly with every movement, fingers curling into shaky fists even when it was useless with his belt restraining you.

When you turned your face to the side, you saw figures at the other end of the alley— not hallucinations, nothing scary, just passersby on the street— and you reached out for them instinctively as hope flooded your chest.  Blinking the tears from your eyes, you could see them clearer: a man and woman, older, well-dressed.  “P-please,” you croaked out in a broken voice, “please, help me— call the police—”

They heard you, and they turned and looked at you, only to grimace and turn away; the man pulled his date closer, shuffling her away with him as they kept walking.  You whimpered pathetically, and Crane laughed above you.  “That’s Gotham for you,” he mused.  “No one wants to get involved.  These are the people Batgirl wants to save?”

They weren’t the only ones who saw, either; later, a small crowd of young men in bandanas and baggy pants passed by— some of them looked young enough to still be in high school.  You prayed to anything that would listen that they would move along without noticing, but one of them saw and pointed at you two with a scoffing laugh.  Feeling as if you could throw up, you shut your eyes tight and heard the chorus of jeers as they realized what they were seeing.  They laughed and hollered; what the fuck, dude! and ohh shit and hey, she’s pretty hot declared in juvenile voices between raunchy chuckles.  You saw flashes of light when you blinked your eyes— were they taking pictures of this with their phones?  You wondered if Jonathan would be forced to stop them, if he was concerned about evidence, but he didn’t react at all… he didn’t even slow down.

Once they’d gotten an eyeful and the sight had lost its shock, they wandered away— you could still hear their voices echoing around the buildings for a moment until it all faded in with the ambient sounds of the city: sirens, horns, footsteps, and that perpetual Gotham drizzle.

“I can feel it,” he whispered to you suddenly, “it keeps squeezing me.  Such a needy fucking cunt.”

You didn’t know if the ‘cunt’ was referring to your anatomy or to you as a person, and either option made your throat a little dry— but dryness was the least of your problems between your legs, in fact you were pretty sure you were dripping now, you could feel how slippery and sticky you’d become.  Your thighs were coated, it was even running down over your swelling and neglected clit.

He lowered himself a bit, resting his arms beside your head and breathing close to your ear.  He even brushed some of your hair out of the way with his hand, wanting to get a better look at your face, and you shut your eyes.

Increasingly loud groans and sighs above you made you realize what was about to happen, just as much as the throbbing feeling inside you.

“F-fuck,” he let out in a scratchy voice.  “Fuck!”

You whimpered yourself just as you heard him choke out a sort of high-pitched, shaky moan, and his thrusts went from erratic and desperate to slower and uneven.  He twitched inside you, and you felt the flood of heat in impossible contrast to the cold ground under you.

“God…” he groaned, his hand on your shoulder tightening and digging a little too deep into your skin.  Then he laughed a little as he finally came to a stop— breathless, light, almost making him sound impressed.  With you or himself, it’s hard to say; it sounded like a laugh of relief.

A lump formed in your throat as you considered what you were supposed to do now— he’d just come inside you, raw, and it made your stomach sink (but it made your walls clench unexpectedly, too).  As he carefully pulled out, you whimpered at the way it reawakened the sting of his first entrance— especially when he first pushed inside.  He sighed heavily when he finally got himself out of you completely, and then his hands— hot, a little clammy, and strong— came into view to free your aching wrists from his belt.  

He stood up over you, and you heard him readjust his trousers before zipping them up and putting back on his belt.  “Was it good for you?” he asked with a quiet, but smug, chuckle.

Bringing your hands nearer to press against the ground, you tried to lift yourself up on shaking arms.  When your torso was only a few inches off the pavement, Jonathan put his polished shoe on your back between your shoulder blades and pushed you back down.  You whimpered as he looked down at you, tilting his head while he admired your helpless form.

“Stay down,” he ordered.

Finally taking his foot off of you, he picked his mask up from the ground, sighing as he shook some of the raindrops off of it and put it back on.

“Well,” he began with a sigh, his voice modulated by the sack over his head again, “I’ll see you in class.  I look forward to seeing what you do with that paper.”

You didn’t watch him leave; you just heard the warehouse door shut again.  Your eyes were looking blankly forward, blinking away stinging tears, looking at the way the neon lights of the buildings across the street reflected in the puddles on the ground.

~

You jolted, much more than necessary, when someone knocked on the bathroom door; it made the water in your bath ripple, though the fluffy white surface of the bubbles was hardly disturbed.  “Can I come in?” you heard Bruce’s voice.

“Yeah,” you answered, but he stopped when he opened the door.

“You’re not decent,” he noticed, turning away.

“There’s bubbles everywhere, you can’t see anything,” you sighed, and he stepped the rest of the way in.  A pause that both of you pretended wasn’t awkward occurred.

“Tim told me that you came back roughed up,” he said eventually.

You said nothing.

“I told you not to—” he began.

“I know.” 

He sighed; you kept staring forward at the white tile wall in front of you.  "What happened?" he asked simply.

“I know Tim told you already— two guys, probably Falcone’s— they went at me in a tunnel by the Southside,” you explained with a sigh.  “I was just following a stolen van, I didn’t know who took it— I would’ve called you if I knew.  I just wanted something I could handle on my own.”

You knew the story didn’t add up; Falcone’s men would’ve probably given you a black eye, maybe a broken nose, and bruises on your stomach from kicks and punches.  Instead what you had were concrete scrapes on your cheek, fingerprint-sized bruises on your hips and thighs, and thin abrasions all around your wrists.  Not to mention the jitters and auditory hallucinations from working Crane’s toxin out of your system— his voice, still in your ear: just a stupid little girl in a mask.  You’d stopped looking over your shoulder by now, but your heart still raced every time.

You knew the story didn’t add up, but you knew it didn’t matter, because Bruce was going to buy it.  He wasn’t ready to imagine the truth yet.  This time, when you heard Crane’s voice, it wasn’t a hallucination but a memory: you sure were eager for an explanation.

Bruce nodded and began to walk out of the bathroom.  “Alright,” he said.  “Rest up.”

You scoffed to yourself as he left quietly— for a detective, he still had a few blindspots.  Surely, we all do.

Left alone in the bathroom again, you were surrounded by silence once more.  In silence, it was easier to hear his voice in your ear.  Just a stupid little girl in a mask.

The shrill sound of your cell phone startled you, and you awkwardly leaned out of the tub just far enough to grab it off of the pile of towels you'd left it on.

"Hello?" you answered, irritation obvious in your tone.

“Hello, ma’am, this is Tracy from the Gotham University Student Wellness Center,” the sweet, lilting voice came from the other end of the line.  “We recently received notice of concern that you may be experiencing domestic violence.  We’d love for you to come into our office to discuss this and receive complementary counseling, when’s a good time that we could—?”

You hung up and tossed the phone away, sinking down into the water.

[the0doreslover]

Stuck forever by the... glue? | t.n x fem!reader

summary: you and theodore are quite literally “stuck together”

warnings: a few innuendos

a/n: so i’ve been MIA for a little while but i hope this 4k piece makes up for it 😬😬😬

‘just make it to friday’

‘just make it to friday’

‘just make it to friday’

These were the five simple words that played in your mind since the beginning of the week.

Maybe it was because your mother had been sending you a letter every day, reinforcing the importance of your success in any exam you are to partake in, or because your professors had seemed to be putting extra pressure on you at the moment, or maybe… just maybe it was because you were simply tired, that every day seemed to be getting harder.

Your friends weren’t much help, it wasn’t their fault, they just couldn’t understand the pressure you had been going through over the past few weeks. You had unintentionally pushed them away.

Friday morning at last.

You had a little while to kill before your first lesson of the day and had decided on sitting in the courtyard.

You were walking towards your usual seat behind the large oak tree when you noticed

a rather peculiar looking sketchbook in its place

You picked it up, and opened the first page, and there in the neatest writing was the words; Property Of Theodore Nott

Great.

You were just admiring the pattern on the front of the book when a hand on your wrist startled you.

Looking up, in all his glory was Theodore Nott.

You didn’t have a chance to fully clock him, when he snatched the book from your hands.

“Did you open the book?” he asked, seeming to be catching his breath

“What?”

“i said did you open the book?” he urged, louder this time.

“No… Nott i didn’t” you answered

“right… well your blouse is undone” he nodded towards your chest.

You gasped slightly pulling your fingers towards the buttons, you felt around for a second until he started laughing “i lied”

“why do you have to be such a dick” you groaned noticing he tried to change the subject away from his sketchbook

“i guess i was born that way” he shrugged, with a slight grin on his face “why do you have to be such a prat?”

“i guess i was born that way” you huffed before walking away from him

Seeing as you had only a few minutes before your lesson, you had decided on going a bit earlier.

Professor Flitwick's classroom was already half-full, the usual chatter filling the air as students settled into their seats.

After what felt like an eternity, Flitwick clapped his hands together, drawing everyone's attention. "Alright, today we're going to practice some partner work. Pair up and choose the most interesting charm you can think of, the winning pair will be free from the assignment i am giving out later”

You groaned inwardly. Partner work meant having to socialize, something you didn't feel up to after the morning's events. You stayed seated, hoping someone would approach you. Instead, you felt a presence next to your desk. Looking up, you saw Theodore standing there,

"I’ll partner with you” he said taking the seat next to you

You blinked in surprise. Maybe he was trying to sabotage you in revenge of the morning…. but seeing some of the other options for partners, he didn’t seem so bad

"fine"

The two of you moved to an empty corner of the classroom, while you grabbed a study guide to charms.

“We’re not using that” theodore laughed

“well unless you’re secretly a charms dictionary i’m not sure what you think we should use”

He reached into his bag and pulled out a thick grey book, labelled “A masters guide to charms”

“Sorry Nott i didn’t know you were a master” you mocked him bowing your head down

“yeah yeah funny” he rolled his eyes opening the first page to its contents

“how about this one?” you asked pointing to a picture of a beautiful ocean

“no way i don’t really want to drown today”

you glared at his reply

“let’s do this” he hummed

“no way, i’m not turning everything edible”

“boring” he sighed

“lets do this” “we’ll do this”

you both said at the same time pointing to a photo of a man appearing to be stuck to a tree.

After agreeing on the spell and practising it without wands for a little while, You decided you should try it out.

“i have a pencil and a sharpener. Try on them” you said pulling both out your pocket and placing them infront of him

Stepping back you watched theodore perform the spell.

one

two

three

“nothing happened?” you sighed

“i think i can see that myself” he grabbed the pencil and placed it closer to the sharpener

“let’s do it at the same time. That way it might be stronger” you suggested and picked your wand up.

“one” you looked at him to ensure he was doing it correctly

“two” he watched your hands to ensure you had placed your wand at the right point”

“Three!” Just as you both cast your charm, a sudden jolt sent your wands askew. You glanced up in surprise to see Fred and George Weasley barreling past.

"Watch it!" Theodore snapped, but it was too late.

The spell went haywire. You felt a strange pull on your hand and looked down to see your fingers stuck to Theodore's. His eyes widened as he tried to pull away, but your hands were firmly glued together.

"Fred! George!" you called after the twins, who had stopped and were now doubled over with laughter. "What did you do?"

"Nothing, love, it seems we just gave your charm a little nudge," Fred grinned, winking at you.

"we are very familiar with this charm" George added, chuckling.

"So you can fix this?" Theodore demanded, his usual cool demeanor slipping into frustration.

"Afraid not, mate. You'll have to wait it out," Fred said, still laughing. "The charm wears off in a 24 hours."

“Even if we performed it at the same time?” you asked

This seemed to make the twins laugh even harder

“let’s say an estimate of 48 hours then”

As the twins walked away, still laughing, you turned to Theodore. "This is your fault," you accused, trying to free your hand but only managing to make the bond tighter.

"My fault? You're the one who suggested we practice that spell," he shot back, though there was a hint of a smile playing on his lips.

“You said it too!” you argued

“Okay stop pulling! it’s my hand too!” he said

"Well, now what?" you sighed, looking at your joined hands.

“we need to find Hermione"

Theodore sighed "why?"

“because she is literally smarter than you”

Navigating the crowded corridors of Hogwarts with your hand stuck to Theodore's was an exercise in patience.

Students cast curious glances your way, and whispers followed you down the halls. You kept your head down, focusing on getting to the Gryffindor common room as quickly as possible.

As you entered the common room, heads turned, and the chatter died down. Harry, Ron, and Hermione were sitting by the fireplace, deep in conversation. They looked up simultaneously, eyes widening at the sight of you and Theodore hand-in-hand.

"What in Merlin's name?" Ron blurted out, almost dropping the chess piece he was holding.

Hermione stood up, her brows knitting in confusion. "What’s happening?"

You cleared your throat. "We had a bit of a mishap in Charms. Fred and George decided to 'assist' our spell, and now we're stuck like this."

Harry snorted, trying to hide his laughter. "Of course it was Fred and George."

You felt your cheeks flush with embarrassment as Hermione approached, examining your joined hands. "Hmm, let me see," she muttered, pulling out her wand and waving it gently over your hands. "It's a strong charm. They must have amplified it somehow."

"Can you fix it?" you asked, desperation creeping into your voice.

Hermione bit her lip. "It might take a bit of time. This isn't a simple charm to reverse, especially if they boosted its strength. Let's sit down, and I'll see what I can do."

You and Theodore awkwardly made your way to a nearby table, still joined at the hand. Hermione began leafing through her Charms textbook, occasionally glancing up at your hands.

"Are you sure it wasn't intentional?" Harry teased, a mischievous glint in his eye.

"Shut up, Potter," Theodore shot back, but there was no real malice in his voice.

You rolled your eyes, trying to ignore the heat rising in your face. "Can you please just help us, Hermione?"

"Alright, alright," she said, waving her hand to shush the boys. "I think I found something. It says here that a reversal spell should work, but it needs to be performed perfectly, or it could make things worse."

"Perfectly?" you echoed, feeling a pang of anxiety. "And if it goes wrong?"

"Well, we might end up with more than just your hands stuck together," Hermione admitted. "But don't worry, I've got this."

“Okay i’m ready… let’s do it” you breathed in

“Wait… i can’t do it now, i need some time to practise it. As i said, it could go very wrong of not performed perfectly”

you groaned and fell backwards onto the sofa.

Theodore glanced at the clock on the wall, then at you, his expression shifting to one of mild panic. "I have to cut our despair short. I have Quidditch practice now."

You blinked at him, still processing the absurdity of the situation. "Okay, go then."

He raised your joined hands, giving you a pointed look.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione burst into laughter. Ron clutched his side, gasping for breath. "Good luck at practice, mate!"

Harry smirked. "Maybe you can use the bonding time to strategize."

Theodore rolled his eyes, clearly annoyed. "Yeah it’s all fun and jokes now potter, but we have a match against you tomorrow."

Hermione cleared her throat, trying to stifle her giggles. "Alright, you two. I’ll need some time to figure this out. Why don’t you… well, make the best of it?"

You groaned again, feeling the weight of the situation. "Great. Just fantastic."

Theodore tugged gently at your joined hands, pulling you toward the door. "Come on, i don’t have all day."

As you approached the Slytherin locker room, you felt a sinking feeling in your stomach. Theodore seemed to sense your apprehension.

"I need to get changed," he said leading you into the locker room. The room was empty, the rest of the team already on the pitch.

You looked around, feeling incredibly awkward. "Um, how are we going to do this?"

Theodore glanced at his Quidditch uniform hanging on a nearby hook, then back at you. "We'll have to cut the sleeve of my uniform."

You stared at him, unsure if he was serious. "Cut the sleeve? Are you sure?"

He nodded, his expression resigned. "It's the only way. Unless you have a better idea?"

You shook your head, feeling a bit guilty. "No, I guess not. Do you have scissors?"

Theodore rummaged through his locker, producing a pair of small, sharp scissors. He handed them to you, and you took a deep breath, trying to steady your hands.

"Alright, hold still," you instructed, carefully cutting through the fabric of his shirt sleeve. The sound of the scissors slicing through the material was oddly loud in the quiet locker room.

Theodore watched you, his expression unreadable, but you could feel his gaze burning into you. His breath hitched slightly as you drew closer to his skin, "You're surprisingly good at this," he said

You glanced up at him, surprised. "Really? I feel like I'm ruining your shirt."

He shrugged, "It's just a shirt. Besides, you can sew it back together later, right?"

You smiled, feeling a bit more at ease. "Yeah, I can do that. Don't worry, I'll fix it."

With the sleeve cut, Theodore carefully slid his arm out of the shirt, keeping your joined hands steady. He then reached for his Quidditch uniform

"Now for the hard part," he said, looking at the uniform's sleeve.

You repeated the process, cutting the sleeve of the uniform with as much precision as you could muster. The fabric was tougher, but you managed to make a clean cut. Theodore slipped into the uniform, and you couldn't help but admire how the green and silver suited him. His muscles flexed under the tight fabric, and for a moment, you found it hard to look away.

He smirked teasingly "stop checking me out."

You rolled your eyes, your face flushing. "you’re insufferable… i’m trying to make sure the sleeve fits right," you retorted.

The reality of your situation hit you again as you exited the locker room, your hands still firmly stuck together. Navigating the hallways and the field together was awkward, to say the least.

As you approached the Quidditch pitch, the rest of the Slytherin team was already in mid-practice, flying through the air, tossing Quaffles, and practicing their Beater drills.

The sight of you and Theodore hand-in-hand drew immediate attention.

Draco was the first to approach, a sly grin on his face. "whats happening here?" he laughed, "Nott, I didn't know you needed a babysitter for practice."

Theodore shot his friend a warning look. "Shut up, Draco."

Draco chuckled, his eyes gleaming with amusement. “i thought you guys hated each other? when did you make it official?” he laughed louder this time

"You are the only one laughing" theodore said chuckling at him

“i feel sorry for you” draco said towards you “anyway, let’s continue with practise”

You did your best to stay out of the way,

draco had allowed you and theo to simply sit in the stands while someone threw a bludger at him to try and hit.

he clearly didn’t try hard enough as you got hit in your head twice.

A few of the players couldn't resist taking jabs at you and Theodore as they ran past.

"Hey, Nott, maybe she can be our good luck charm!" one of them called out, laughing.

"Or a distraction for the other team!" another added, snickering.

You clenched your jaw, trying to ignore the comments.

“they’re all stupid” theodore would say

Finally, one player took it too far.

"Hey, Nott, why don't you just sleep with her already? Maybe that'll break the spell!"

Theodore stopped dead in his tracks, his face flushing with anger. "That's enough!"

a few members of the team fell silent, taken aback by his outburst. The player who made the remark, Marcus Flint, sneered. "What's the matter, Nott? Can't take a joke?"

Theodore scoffed. "Shut up you tosser, yes, she is a girl, but she didn’t ask to be surrounded by you idiots, so the least you can do is respect her"

You could feel the tension radiating off him, and it was clear that his patience had reached its limit. Flint opened his mouth to retort, but before he could say anything, you stepped forward.

"It’s okay," you said, "We didn't ask for this to happen, but we're dealing with it. So if you're done acting like children, maybe you can focus on your practise."

"Alright, enough," Draco said, his tone firm. "let’s end here today yeah, let’s just hope today was enough to get us our win tomorrow”

As the Quidditch practice ended, the players dispersed, heading towards the locker room.

"I can't go in there," you said, tugging on Theodore's hand to stop him from entering. "I don't want to see anyone...you know, changing."

Theodore paused "Fine, we'll wait out here until they're done."

You both sat on the bench outside the locker room, Silence hung heavily between you, neither of you wanting to break it. Finally, Theodore spoke.

“you should of punched flint, no one would’ve of said anything”

“well, i’m not one to start fights, that would make me reckless” you sighed

Theodore’s smirk widened. “well you did suggest we do this spell” he lifted up your hands “together, that’s pretty reckless.”

“Oh, please,” you retorted, turning to face him. “Like you didn’t push for it too. That ‘I’m a master of charms’ act? Such a joke.”

Theodore’s eyes narrowed, and he leaned in slightly. “well you’re always whining about how hard life is. If you’re so tired, maybe you should’ve stayed in bed instead of trying to impress everyone.”

“Impress everyone?” you shot back, your faces inches apart. “Nice try, but your house is all about being superior, right?”

“Well, if we’re talking about superiority,” Theodore said, his breath warm against your face, “maybe you should look at your own house, the loudest bunch of show-offs.”

“Loud?” you challenged, your fingers brushing against his arm. “At least we’re not sneaky and backstabbing. I’d rather be loud than be a two-faced snake.”

Theodore’s eyes flashed. “Better sneaky than a blabbering idiot. At least I don’t go around pretending to be perfect.”

“Perfect?” you scoffed, leaning in so close that your lips nearly brushed his. “You think you’re so high and mighty. Well, you’re not.”

“Yeah?” Theodore’s voice dropped to a low murmur as he leaned even closer. “Maybe I’m just tired of you acting like you’ve got it all together.”

“You mean like you’re tired of being a pompous jerk?” you spat, “I’m tired of your attitude.”

Your faces were so close now. Just as it seemed like something might actually happen, Theodore suddenly pulled back.

“Honestly, can’t we just have one conversation without it turning into a drama?” Theodore said, crossing his arms and turning slightly away from you.

“Oh, so now you’re the expert on handling disagreements?” you retorted,

“Well, you’re not exactly making it easy to like you,” Theodore snapped, turning towards you for the tenth time. “You’re impossible.”

“And you’re a complete—” you began, but your words were cut off as Theodore’s lips almost touched yours again.

you both sat back

“Let’s just get this charm sorted and go our separate ways.”

You nodded, your jaw clenched.

“your blouse is open” he said staring at the pitch

“yeah nice try”

“i’m not joking” he urged

you discreetly looked down to see that your two buttons were, in fact undone.

you slowly dragged your hand towards your top, pulling theodore’s hand with it.

Your fingers failed to do the button with his hand in the way.

“Nott, please flatten your hand” you said lowly

he cleared his throat “if i flatten it… it would be on your chest”

you breathed out and closed your eyes slowly, before flattening his hand yourself.

Theodore shifted, his hand still pressed awkwardly against your chest. His eyes met yours, and for a brief, unsettling moment, the anger seemed to dissolve into something else.

“You’re such a...” Theodore started

“Don’t start,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

“You make me feel... things I don’t want to deal with.”

After visiting Hermione, who delivered the disappointing news that you and Theodore might be stuck like this for another day, the reality of the situation set in. The idea of spending an entire night with your hands stuck to Theodore's was less than appealing.

After agreeing on it, you both reluctantly made your way to the Astronomy tower. The tension was high, and you could feel every small touch between you—whether it was Theodore adjusting his position or the slight bump of your hands against each other.

“I guess we should figure out where we’re going to sleep,” Theodore said

“Right,” you replied, trying to sound collected despite the discomfort. “Do you have any suggestions?”

Theodore shrugged, glancing around the tower as if searching for an escape route. “We could just sit here until morning?”

You sighed, feeling the exhaustion of the day catch up with you. “Fine. Just... let’s try to make this as bearable as possible.”

You both found a quiet corner of the tower and made yourselves as comfortable as you could, given the circumstances.

“So,” Theodore began after a moment of silence, “since we’re stuck together, we might as well talk.”

“Talk?” you asked, raising an eyebrow. “What could we possibly have to talk about?”

“Plenty,” Theodore said with a shrug. “We’ve been arguing nonstop. Maybe it’s time we actually had a proper conversation.”

You considered this for a moment. “Alright, fine. What do you want to talk about?”

“Let’s start with why you always act like the world is out to get you,” Theodore said, leaning back against the wall.

You stared at him, taken aback by the question. “What makes you think I act that way?”

“You always seem so stressed and ready to snap,” Theodore explained. “It’s like you’ve got this cloud hanging over you.”

“maybe i do”

A brief silence followed, during which you both seemed to be lost in thought.

“So,” Theodore said, breaking the silence, “what annoys you the most about me”

You laughed slightly. “Your carelessness.”

Theodore chuckled softly. “i care about a lot of things actually”

“yeah? like what”

he stared at you in a comfortable silence, leaving that question unanswered

You smiled faintly

As the evening wore on, you both found it increasingly difficult to ignore the closeness of your situation. The moonlight made even the smallest touches feel more significant.

Eventually, you both fell asleep, leaning against each other for support.

You rubbed your eyes, trying to shake off the remnants of sleep. “Oh, this is just perfect,” you groaned, pushing yourself up and realizing just how tangled up you were. “We need to get to our dormitories and change. It’s almost time for the Quidditch match.”

You glanced around the tower, feeling the urgency of the situation. Theodore sat up, still a bit dazed, and ran a hand through his messy hair. “Then we need to find hermione”

You both maneuvered to stand up, your hands still firmly attached. It was a delicate balance, trying not to trip over each other as you made your way out of the Astronomy Tower.

The corridors of Hogwarts were quieter at this hour, but you still drew curious glances from early-rising students who whispered and pointed as you and Theodore hurried by.

Once you got to your dorm you instructed theo to turn around while you changed.

after you had gotten ready you both sprinted to the locker room and sighed in relief at hermione waiting there you.

You both lifted your hands infront of her ready to be freed

“i can’t perform the spell”

“what?”

“it’s too dangerous, i even consulted with mcgonagall, she said that we will just have to wait it out”

You sighed, feeling frustration “It’s okay, Hermione. Thank you for trying.”

Hermione gave you both a sympathetic smile. “I’ll head to the stands and watch the match. Good luck”

As Hermione walked away, you turned to Theodore, “I’m really sorry about this, Theo. I know how much this match means to you.”

He looked at you, his eyes softening. “It’s okay. We’ll have to try and manage.”

The tension between you seemed to dissolve slightly as you both stood there

The Quidditch match was about to start, and with the stands starting to fill up, you found yourselves standing closer than you had all day. The space between you seemed to shrink and In a moment of impulsive decision, Theodore leaned in, and before either of you could second-guess, your lips met his.

When the kiss ended, you pulled back slightly, feeling a rush of warmth spread through you. You noticed, with a jolt, that Theodore’s hands were now resting comfortably on your waist. The realization hit you, and you looked at him in surprise. “Theo… your hands are on my waist.”

Theodore blinked, confusion crossing his face, before it dawned on him. “Wait—” he started, looking at your hands which were now free.

You both stared at each other, “I guess we really did have to kiss to break the spell,” you joked with a light laugh.

Theodore chuckled and a genuine smile lit up his face. “I suppose so.”

“Well,” Theodore said, “I’d better get changed before the match starts. I’m sure the team’s been waiting for me.”

“yeah” you said, smiling slightly. “good luck.”

he quickly leaned forward to kiss you one last time before fake saluting you with a smile on his face and turning towards the locker room.

“wait theodore”

he turned around

“your buttons undone” you pointed to his trousers

[blegh-110]

i. "i was enchanted to meet you" | Sam Monroe

Pairing: older brother's bestfriend!Sam x fem!reader

Summary: Older brother’s best friend! Sam Monroe who you really got to know when you were 15 and he was 17.

Warnings: None

Word count: 1.9k

A/N: This is chapter II of this series where I am using songs from Speak Now, enjoy!

Your sophomore year of high school was great.

One reason being that you had finally made a friend who was in three of your classes; geometry, honors english, and P.E.. 

The second reason being that Sam was in your very last class of the day, introduction to art. 

Neither of you were artists, or even good drawers. But that was what made your time together so fun. There wasn’t a day that went by where you two didn’t make fun of each other’s drawings. 

“Sam! It’s supposed to be an orange!” You laughed with tears in your eyes as you stared at your poorly done drawing of a peeled orange half. 

“(Y/N), it looks like a vagina.” He covered his mouth with his hand as he tried, very badly, to hide his laughter. 

And because of your constant noise-making, and talking, and interruptions, the teacher decided to move Sam across the room. But that had made it almost worse. You couldn’t even look at him from your seat because the situation was just too funny, you would have to look away before you’d burst out laughing. And as soon as class was dismissed and the two of you would leave the classroom, there was nothing holding back the bottled up amusement anymore and you both would walk out of school with tears in your eyes. 

It all happened so often that you didn’t want to stop your enjoyment and go home. And neither did Sam, you guessed. Instead of leaving you and driving back to his own house, he began driving you home and dropping you off. Which then turned to driving you home and hanging around the house after you bravely asked if he wanted to come inside for a little bit. And it got to the point where he automatically turned his car off when he parked on the street, having already set his mind on spending more time with you. But this didn’t happen every single day. 

There were times when you had to send him home. It wasn’t for anything serious, in fact, you wanted nothing more than to spend more time with him. But there were days where you had a big test coming up or tons of homework to finish or an essay due the next day, and you knew you would get none of it done if Sam was in the house. 

“Sam, get out!” You giggled as you lightly pushed him to the front door, your fingertips burning at the touch of his back.

“Alright, fine. But what am I supposed to do?” 

“I don’t know, go hang out with your other friend?” You clearly hinted at your older brother, ready to close the door and start your essay that was due the next day. It was your fault really. You had a whole week to finish it, but you kept pushing it aside because you wanted to be with Sam instead. So your whole school day was spent outlining and finding evidence with any spare time you had, and just generally stressing out. 

“He’s at football practice though.”

“Then just watch.”

“But it’s boring.”  

You gave him a pointed look. 

“Okay, okay, I’ll go. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He said while leaning in for a hug then leaving.

One thing you quickly learned about Sam was that he was actually quite attentive and affectionate. He always knew when an exam was coming up for you because of the way you became less talkative and more isolated as the date got closer. He didn’t want to bring that observation up to you though because what would that do? So he did the best he could to make those few days just a little bit better for you. Which included buying you study snacks on your way home, keeping quiet in your art class and instead listening to music together, and sometimes helping you study if you let him. You didn’t notice it at first, too caught up with the thought that you might fail the exam. But when you did eventually catch on you somehow fell even more in love with Sam. 

And the one thing about him that made it harder to breathe was his need for physical touch. Whenever he saw you at school he was quick to leave his friends and greet you with a hug and ask how you’re doing. In your shared art class he was always shoulder to shoulder with you. If he thought you were too far from him, he’d hook his fingers underneath your seat and pull your chair right to him. When the two of you would walk home, his arm would always wrap around your shoulder and pull you close to him. If he saw you walking to class he was happy to take your books and walk you there with a hand on your back. And when it was just the two of you at your house watching a movie, he’d lean his entire body on yours and take a nap. 

You wanted so badly to return those affections. You wanted to wrap your arms around him, you wanted to match his excitement when he saw you in the halls, but it felt impossible for you. And you knew that Sam wouldn't mind, but you just weren’t very good at showing affection the way he did. 

You also learned that he was a bit… possessive and protective of his stuff. He was asked a few times by other students if they could borrow his drawing supplies, or even the brushes provided by the classroom, and he always, meanly, said no. Or when you constantly witnessed him smack your brother's hand away from his bag of chips. 

“Sam, c’mon, I didn’t eat anything for breakfast and I didn’t bring my lunch!” Your brother exclaimed while trying again to steal Sam’s food.

“Get away from me.” He grumbled with smiley fries in his mouth,  

“You’re never this way with my sister.” 

Which was true. He was always sharing his stuff with you. Whether it was food or letting you keep his pencil because you couldn’t find your own, and it was always the pink Paper Mate ones. He was also always offering or making you take some of whatever snack he had. 

“Here, have it.” And he gave you the last oreos he had bought from the cafeteria. 

And there was a time when you were paired up for a project with the boy who took you to the dance in your eighth grade year, the one who you let copy your homework. When you first heard your name with his own you wanted the ground to swallow you, but then he surprisingly brought the whole situation up and apologized for it. And you couldn’t hold a grudge if you wanted to, it happened two years ago and he seemed good now. So you forgave and forgot and the two of you planned to get the assignment started during lunch in the library. Unfortunately, Sam wasn’t as forgiving as you were.

“Didn’t he make you cry? Why don’t you tell the teacher you just don’t want to be partners with him?” He asked while opening his car door for you. 

“Sam, it’s okay! He said he was sorry and it’s not like I’m hanging out with him.” He scoffed at the last part then closed it after you had gotten in. 

“You better not because I’m not over it.”

“Did he take you to the dance?”

“No, but I was the one who saw how upset you were. Hated seeing you like that. I just don’t want him to think that this could be a second chance or something.”

“I appreciate your concern, I really do. But it’s not going beyond a school project, I promise.”

“Okay, but if he tries something, you tell me first.” You rolled your eyes with a smile and nodded your head. You didn’t dare tell him but you felt more than just appreciative, you felt cherished and looked after when he got this way, which wasn’t the first time. And each talk left you wanting him even more. 

And the last bit of his personality that you learned was his introvertness, which again, surprised you. Especially since your brother was actually a pretty sociable person. Like you, Sam was not one to see a large crowd and want to partake in it. The only difference between the two of you was that when you were put in a situation where you were surrounded by a lot of people, your heart would quicken and your hands would get sweaty. You were nervous to talk to other people and felt like you had to. But with Sam, he simply didn’t care to talk to them, he didn’t want to and he made that very clear. 

“Fuck that.” He said when the both of you saw that the school Market was taking place in the courtyard. The market took place for a week, and it was where students sold their own goods. You made the mistake your freshman year of trying to walk through it and go home, but you were always stopped by another student trying to sell you something, whether it was a sticker or their homemade soap, and it was a nightmare. 

There was one time you accidentally got caught up with one of them and they just wouldn’t let you leave. They were selling some homemade body care products, soaps and bath bombs, and you gave every excuse you could to nicely shut them down.

“I don’t have enough money.”

“I really have to get home.”

“I’m not really a bath bomb person.”

“That’s okay! We’ve got lip scrubs! Here, smell these.” Then they proceeded to shove different products in your face while telling you their prices. And while giving a tight lipped smile, you felt a hand wrap around your own. You didn’t have to look to know it was Sam, thank god. 

“Hi, would you like t-”

“Nope.” And he walked away with your hand in his, telling his fellow classmates to “fuck off” as he continued to walk through the market. It felt so natural, like it was supposed to be this way. You’d never felt so comfortable with Sam like this. Before, you were always too overwhelmed by his presence and your own feelings that it became too much. But there you were, holding his hand until the two of you got to his car. 

And it all went away when he graduated. It was a terrible night for you to watch him be handed his diploma, an official sign that the friendship you had built with him was over. You were proud of him, there was no doubt about that. But as soon as the graduating class threw their hats in the air you had to bite your lip to keep your cries from coming out. There was a hollowness in your heart that swallowed any emotion you could feel. 

When the ceremony was over and you and your family went down to the field, he ran right to you and gave you a soul crushing embrace. One where it lifted you off the ground and you had to wrap your arms around him. His graduation gown burned against your cheek. It was a bitter-sweet moment. 

When you got home after a celebration dinner for your brother, you thought about your times with Sam and cried the entire night, wishing you had never met him in the first place so you could save yourself from your heartbreak.

[storiesoflilies]

school bus love (4)

synopsis: a series of successes, but it can’t always be sunshine and rainbows, can it?

pairing: teen!toji fushiguro x teen!f!reader.

warnings: none.

a/n: i’m done with my exams and i’m freeee! to celebrate, i’ve dropped more lily lore hehe. apologies if this isn’t the best, i’m so so tired, but i really wanted to post today! enjoy my darlings xo

drabble series // part 3 // part 5

toji fushiguro was an exceptionally hard nut to crack.

throughout the past two months, they had sent each other daily streaks. as per usual, she sent her usual quirky streaks to try and pique his interest. to her credit, it worked quite a number of times, as they’d had quite a few conversations over snapchat. they hadn’t been flirting, but it was still progress, and she was absolutely ecstatic every time she managed to crack toji’s enigmatic shell and draw him in.

however, they never spoke in person on the bus.

“you’re both bizarre,” her bus buddy had commented in private, rolling her eyes. “how can you snap each other every day and then not even speak actual words?”

she bit her lip nervously, swinging her heavy backpack higher onto her shoulder. “i don’t know! i’m too shy, maybe he is too?”

her bus buddy sighed heavily and rolled her eyes, clawing for her revision notes from somewhere inside her tote bag. exam season was in full swing, and having any sort of distraction was far from ideal. she was studying hard, but with thoughts of toji rippling in the back of her mind like a tantalizing fruit swinging high up on a tree, just out of reach.

she noticed that he often deflected the conversation back to her whenever she asked him slightly more personal questions. toji seemed to more interested in hearing about her old life back home, about the way of life and culture. while it was nice that he took an interest, his deflections and apparent unwillingness to reveal much about himself made her seriously doubt if toji had any sort of feelings for her.

chasing after him was maddening, and still so very addictive.

however, she had to decide when it was time to go cold turkey and cut her losses, but that time wasn’t just yet.

a movie was playing in the background as she peacefully lounged in the living room after a particularly long day at school. the rain hammered down outside, creating a pleasant hum of droplets hitting the roof, and she snuggled up further into the couch with her steaming mug of tea.

“so, how’s the handsome boy doing?” her mom suddenly perked up, sipping a glass of fizzy water. “the one at the bus stop.”

“oh, toji? we’re still talking.”

“you’re still just talking? he hasn’t asked you on a date yet?”

“mom, don’t. it’s exam time, i’m not thinking about that right now, and i bet he isn’t either.”

“alright, alright! i’m just saying, maybe you should take the initiative instead of waiting for him.”

she contemplated that with a finger placed thoughtfully on her lip. she’d always wanted to be asked on her first date, not the other way around, and it was a sentiment she wanted to hold on to for as long as possible. moreover, she wasn’t even totally sure that toji liked her back.

the plan had to shift; she had to step it up just a notch.

that night, after sending a picture of her midnight snack of avocado on toast and successfully attracting toji’s attention, she laid out the bare bones of a subtle plan. a plan that involved an indirect suggestion that should hopefully end with him asking her to see the latest avengers movie with him.

haha, so true. have you seen endgame yet?

toji fushiguro: nah not yet, wbu?

nah, not yet. i rlly want to tho 🙃

toji fushiguro: ah yeha, me and my friends are going on tuesday

well… fuck.

oh nice!! haha no spoilers though

toji fushiguro: hmm oh well now you mention it

toji fushiguro: nah, dw i wont i’m not that much of a dick haha

yeah lol, well hopefully i can see it before i go back home

that was a good nudge, right? it wasn’t too subtle. if he liked her, then surely he would take the initiative now.

toji fushiguro: oh when r you goin back?

a week after my last exam, can’t wait lol

toji fushiguro: i bet, it’ll be so much better than here

ah it’s not so bad here haha, wbu? what’s your plans for the summer?

toji fushiguro: so how hot does it get over there in summer?

she felt deflated, like a giant hot air balloon loosing all its shape and spluttering into a mess as it hurtled to the ground. why was toji so reluctant to answer such simple questions? it wasn’t like she was asking him to reveal the deepest, dirtiest secrets about himself. her heart was only half in the conversation after that, and she indulged his questions for a while before it fizzled out, like a sizzling party sparklers doused in an ice-cold splash of reality.

would this crush soon fizzle out in the same way too?

general taglist: @tadabzzzbee @wannapizzamymindposts @stromynight

school bus love taglist: @badbyeyoongi

side note: i told my boyfriend i was writing this little drabble series about us, and his exact response was, “ew, why?” he doesn’t like to admit that we were cute. he’s a big grump, but i love him very much lol.

©storiesoflilies 2024, all rights reserved. please do not plagiarize, translate, or repost any of my work on other sites! i only post on ao3 and tumblr.

[spence-whore]

HIHI!! can I request spencer celebrating reader for finishing all their exams?? you write him SO SO well and I know it'll become an instant fav 🤭 <333 (if you do want to write it!)

Final Exams

Spencer Agnew x Reader

A/N I’m obsessed with this because I just finished finals last week and I’m pretty sure I failed every single one of them woooo i have no clue if there’s any university’s close to the area that the cast lives in but for this, let’s just act like there is:) one last thing, I thought of going the route where he throws a big party but i felt like the more laid back comfortable type of celebration would be more him whenever it comes to something like this. please overlook the typos and incorrect grammar, im v sick.

one last thing, im trying something new with these. im trying it out in third person instead of using ‘you’ whenever talking about the reader. im also using they/them pronouns to be gender inclusive:) let me know if you like this better or if you liked how i wrote it before with using “you”.

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Everyone knew how stressed out Y/N had been for the last month due to their finals. They become so obsessed on the idea of making the best grades that they can or they feel like they simply have not done good enough. This leads to their mental health declining rapidly and them being in a very low spot for a while. Spencer knew this and thought of something he could possibly do after their last final. That last final happened to be today. Y/N had spent the entire night studying, only got two hours of sleep, then got up a few hours early to study before heading to their university.

A few hours had passed and Y/N was finally back in their car, heading back home.

They had dialed Spencer’s number before heading home Y/N sat in silence for a minute before Spencer answered, “Hey Y/N! How did the exam go?”

“Honestly? I feel like I completely flunked it. I’m just so glad it’s all over till the fall.” Y/N said sighing while taking a turn.

“I’d say so, bub. You need a break.” Spencer responded with a soft tone.

“I’m gonna head back to my apartment for the rest of the day. If you maybe wanna come over after work, you’re more than welcome to. I might order out food then watch a movie or something.” Y/N said, trying to think of some way to destress for the rest of the day.

“Of course. I’ll shoot you a text to let you know whenever I’m heading your way.” Spencer said, they could hear the smile on his face.

Little did Y/N know, Spencer was already at their apartment. Y/N had given him a key whenever they moved to LA and became best friends. He practically lived there whenever the two of them were best friends. That was around four years ago. Now, Y/N and Spencer have been dating for two years. He still practically lives there whenever he isn’t busy with work. He thought of setting up a little self care day for them. He was going to draw a warm bath whenever they got closer to the apartment. The bathroom had candles everywhere’s, alongside snacks, and two wine glasses. The bath was big enough to fit three people, so Spencer thought he could either join Y/N or he could leave them to take the bath while he hung out in the living room. The kitchen was set up because during this time, he was going to order their favorite ramen from this restaurant near their apartment. He had also decked out the living room, so it was a huge comfy dream. The couch was covered in soft, fluffy blankets and pillows. There were fairy lights hung above the couch and a gift Spencer had fixed together for them on the table.

Spencer practically was burning a hole into his phone. Whenever he seen Y/N’s location was finally close to the apartment, he jumped up from the couch and booked it to the bathroom to start the bath. He let the water run until it was scalding hot and then plugged the drain. The water ran around three minutes then he turned it off. Y/N’s location had finally arrived to the apartment and he could tell they were making their way up to steps.

He felt like a little kid waiting for their christmas presents. He was about to explode, just sitting there waiting for them on the couch. A few minutes passed and the noise of keys come from the front door, placing into the lock. He jumped up and stared at the door, waiting to see his partner come walking through the door.

“Spencer?” Y/N’s voice came from the front door, obviously confused.

Spencer jumped up and ran to the front door. “Hi! Okay, so stay there for one second. I just want to explain this before I blindfold you.” He stopped talking for a second to giggle. “That sounds kinky but I got today off from work. I told Ian about how today was your last final. They all decided I could take today off to celebrate with you. At first, I thought about throwing a little get together with some friends. I sat and thought about it for a while though and thought, they could really just use a day of self care. That leads us to now.” He explained with a smile on his face. “Are you in the mood for a bath?” He asked, with hope in his voice and a slight smile on his face.

Y/N was just frozen at the front door and was wanting to burst into tears. This is the sweetest thing someone has ever done for them. “That sounds nice.” Was the only thing they could muster out while staring at him and tears welling in their eyes.

“Oh, don’t cry.” Spencer said quickly while rushing to them and wrapping his arms around them.

“Sorry, I’ve just not really been okay here lately. I can’t thank you enough for being you, Spencer.” Y/N explained wiping at their face while their arms were still wrapped around Spencer neck.

“Well, let’s get you into the bath.” Spencer said before placing his hand in front of their eyes and lead them to the bathroom. He pushed them into the bathroom, “Keep your eyes closed till I tell you to open them.” He explained while stepping in behind them and shutting the door. He very quickly lit the candles around the bathroom and placed the lighter back under the sink. “Okay, open them up.”

Y/N opened their eyes and looked around the bathroom to take the scene in. It looked like something straight out of a cliche romance movie. The bathtub was filled with water and bubbles. There was a tray sitting across the tub with two wine glasses and different candies. They immediately started to tear up and turned around to pull Spencer into a hug. “I cannot thank you enough for this.” They whispered into his shirt.

“Oh, this isn’t the end of it. I have a few options for you. So, would you like this bath alone? Would you like for me to join you or do you want me to sit in here with you and you can tell me about your day?” Spencer said while leaning against the sink.

Y/N stared at the man in front of them before grabbing his face and kissing him very quickly, three different times. “Wait, if I say I want you to get in with me, would you give me a massage? My legs and back are killing me.” Y/N explained, hoping that he would give in.

Spencer didn’t even answer them. He just started stripping from his clothes and Y/N could’ve started crying on the spot. The two took their clothes off and climbed into the tub. At this point, the water was now the perfect warmth. It wasn’t too hot and it wasn’t too cold. Y/N sat on one end while Spencer sat on the other. He pulled his hands under the water and pulled their legs over onto his. “I was told someone needed a massage.” He commented while rubbing his thumbs into their calve.

“I literally don’t know what I do to deserve you.” Y/N said while moaning and placing their head back onto the side of the tub.

Spencer just laughed and shook his head. “You’re a dork. I love you though. Can you grab that wine from the side of the tub and possibly pour us some?”

The two sat in the tub close to ten minutes, drinking their wine and eating candy while talking about their day. Spencer eventually moved the tray and Y/N moved over to his side, with their back facing him. He sat, rubbing their shoulders for a while and they just sat in silence, taking the moment in.

“I can’t thank you enough for everything you do.” Y/N whispered looking over their shoulder at Spencer.

Spencer smiled at Y/N and placed a soft kiss on their shoulder. “Of course. You deserve this after how rough this semester has been on you.” Spencer explained. A few minutes before this, Spencer had placed a door dash order for the food without telling Y/N. It was close to time for them to get out.

“You’re so beautiful.” Spencer randomly blurted while rubbing his hand up and down their arm. Y/N could feel their face getting warm and they just shook their head. They turned around and placed their knees on both sides of Spencer thighs, so they were facing each other. Spencer placed his hands on their waist and just stared at them for a minute. “You literally make me speechless. Like, I can’t put it into words. I know I’m usually the worst with verbalizing how I feel and what I’m thinking but god, I just have to tell you that. You are beautiful.”

All Y/N could do was laugh and shake their head. “I look awful today but thank you love.” They whispered and tried hiding their face reddening.

“Look at you.” Spencer said while placing both of his hands on their face and pulled it close to his. “You do not look awful. You look so beautiful.” He placed a soft kiss on their lips and pulled them into a hug. Y/N leaned back and took this as a moment to kiss Spencer. The two got lost in a kiss for a minute before Spencer pulled back really quickly.

“I don’t mean to cut this off. Trust me, I really don’t want to. I just remembered though, I might have ordered us food and I think it should be arriving any minute.” Spencer explained very quickly, giving Y/N an awkward smile.

Y/N just laughed and climbed off of Spencer, giving him room to climb out of the tub. He handed them a towel and a change of clothes. “I’m gonna dry off and run to the door really quickly. Whenever you get done, just head to the kitchen.” He dried off while explaining this and threw on some clothes.

Y/N took a minute to dry off and pull their hair back while listening to Spencer talk to the door dasher. “Foods here!” His voice boomed throughout the apartment. “My spidey senses were tingling or something. The second I got the door, they were about to knock.” He said throwing the bathroom door open.

It was like time froze for him. He never knew he could love someone like how he loved Y/N but god. He falls harder and harder for them every second. “Wow.” He whispered, just staring at the person in front of him.

Y/N laughed and shoved his shoulder. “Stooooop. You’re gonna inflate my ego, if you’re not careful.” They said while pulling their sweatpants on, which were a pair of old sweats Spencer had and gave to Y/N cause they always stole them whenever they were at his house.

“Maybe, that’s my intentions.” He said with a big grin on his face. “Let’s head to the kitchen, now. Close your eyes though, you’re not allowed to see anything else yet.”

Y/N closed their eyes and placed their hand in Spencer’s, so he could lead them into the kitchen. He stopped and pulled out the chair that faced away from the living room. “Whenever you sit down, you’re not allowed to look into the living room. Whenever we get done eating, we’re going to go in there. Just please, promise me, you won’t look in there till them.” He practically begged them.

Y/N could feel themselves starting to get emotional again because all of this, is just so much. They couldn’t wrap their head around, why someone would want to do something so sweet for them. “You can open your eyes now.” They heard Spencer say from across the room. They opened their eyes and looked around in the kitchen, without turning around and looking towards the living room. Spencer had set up the table with fancy ramen bowls he had found online. They had designs on them with little Totoro’s and soot sprites around the bowl.

“Oh my god, are these Totoro bowls?” Y/N exclaimed, leaning down to look at the bowl in front of them.

Spencer sat in front of them with a big grin on his face. “Yep, I found them while online one day. I got them for us to put our ramen in. They were washed before you got here. So, you can just pour your ramen into the bowl.”

The two sat, talking and eating for around twenty minutes. They just really took their time to take in each other’s company and mainly because Y/N couldn’t stop ranting about one of their professors that really got under their skin.

“Are you ready to head to the living room now?” Spencer asked, pushing himself back in his chair, ready to stand up.

Y/N just nodded their head and stared at Spencer standing in front of them.

“I’ll wash the bowls here in a little bit.” He said while grabbing the one in front of them and placed it in the sink.

Spencer rounded the table and stood beside Y/N. “You can turn around now.” He said while fiddling with his fingers resting at his waist.

Y/N turned around and finally broke into tears. It wasn’t sad tears, they were just so overwhelmed with the amount of love Spencer has for them.

“Hey, hey. What’s wrong?” Spencer said in a hushed tone while pulling Y/N into a big hug.

“I told you about how everything has just been really rough for me here lately. I just got into a really bad spot and everything felt useless there for a while. You always are the sunshine in my day. You always remind me how loved and wanted I am, here.” Y/N explained while trying to not get choked up.

Spencer started to tear up over hearing his partner say this. He looked at them and wanted to break just from looking at them crying. “I am beyond proud of you and I need to tell you that more often. You have worked your ass off for this degree, especially with how tough the things are that you have been learning about. These finals always drain everything out of you and I should just be there for you way more often.” He said while wiping the tears off of Y/N’s face. “Let’s head int the living room.”

The two walked into the living room and Y/N leaped onto the couch. “Oh my GOD.” They practically shouted. “This is like one huge pillow. I literally could just pass out, right here.” Spencer laughed and yanked them up into a sitting position. He nodded towards the table in front of them and that’s when Y/N noticed there was a huge basket sitting there.

“Oh, well, what is this?” Y/N said acting like they were confused and trying to hide a smile on their face. They picked it up and pulled it over onto the couch.

“At first, I thought about just bringing you this whenever I got off work. That was before I got the idea to do all of this.” Spencer explained, giving Y/N a little smile and sat back onto the couch.

Y/N looked throughout the basket and there was many things in it. There were new pjs, one of his sweatshirts, their favorite candy, their favorite coffee, with three gift cards to books a million, target, and dunkin. There was also a huge fluffy blanket, a ghostface plush, and three new records.

Y/N just sat there staring at all of the stuff for a minute before placing the stuff on the table and tackling Spencer into a huge hug. He didn’t move, he just laid there in the spot, holding them. “I did plan on us watching a movie but honestly, do you just want to take a nap?” He whispered.

Y/N very quickly nodded. “A nap sounds real nice. Plus, you’re hilarious if you think I’m going to move right now for you to turn on a movie.” They got quiet for a minute before squeezing Spencer in a tight hug. “Thank you for all of this.”

Spencer didn’t say anything. He just pulled Y/N tighter into him, with his arms wrapped around them resting on their face and one of the back of their head. “Go to sleep, you loser.”

[raainberry]

Studious Confession

« Done deliberately or with a purpose in mind. »

Yunjin x gn!reader

Fluff

synopsis - you and your friend yunjin get sidetracked while speed running revisions for finals

wordcount - 1.8K

A/N - save me scholar yunjin, save me…

Absolute academic weapons.

That’s what you and Yunjin aimed to be when you scheduled a study session at your campus library. Exam season was breathing down your necks, and you ignored it for as long as you could, taking each other on the most impromptu hang-outs instead.

Convenience store runs that lead to mukbangs, walks around campus that somehow turned into treetop adventures, late night drives after a long day of classes you spent screaming to whatever she played on the aux… Risking your education (and probably your future) had never been so fun, but all good things must come to an end.

As the end of your junior year approached you were the first one to bring up studying, suggesting you should probably pump the breaks on the distractions. She only called you a nerd, but gave in when you proposed to study together.

The time itself wouldn’t be fun at all, but at least she’d spend it with you. “A win is a win.”, she’d said over the phone, and it only took a few more days to actually motivate yourselves. Reserving a study room was a step in the right direction, but what happened in there would only make you take two steps back.

“That doesn’t even look like me.” You said after she revealed her doodle in the corner of your notebook.

She spent the last five minutes trying to sketch your features out on the bit of blank paper left on your notes instead of focusing on her own.

“Yes it does, look!” She gestured at the messy drawing. “That’s your eyes and your mouth.”

“I am looking, I’m just not seeing.”

It actually did look like you, Yunjin was too talented for it not to. You were just looking at it upside down as you sat across the table from her.

“Well look harder!”

“I don’t want to, stop distracting me!” You whined, switching your pen for a highlighter.

“You’re so mean! Give me my airpod back.” She whined back, actually catching your attention this time.

“What?”

“I don’t want to share my music with you anymore. I need to listen to sad music alone because you’re so mean to me.” She argued, her hand out waiting for the airpod in your ear.

“Are you serious?” You asked, and she only stared at you, retreating her hand only to fold her arms over her chest. “If I say it does look like me, can I keep it?”

“You can keep the drawing, yeah.” She scoffed and you sighed.

You were unsure whether she was serious or not, so you decided to try something that could only have a positive outcome.

“Coffee break?” You proposed, and just like that, her smile was back.

Relief washed over you when her hand found yours, dragging you down to the nearest vending machine. The latter was familiar, it has seen your faces more times than the study rooms as you sometimes only came by to get a coffee from the machine right next to it.

That’s where you met Yunjin, on one of the rare nights she dedicated to her due projects. You’d offered her one of those cheap paper cups, a hole in your student wallet but nothing compared to the world she invited you in afterwards.

Her own little world, the person she was within it, the things she saw and built… It was all so beautiful. You’d get her a thousand of them if it meant learning one new thing every time.

Sometimes you brought her here in hopes for it, and it never failed. The same thing would happen: you’d get her a coffee, she would fight you, try to pay for yours, and you’d ask her about something you’d noticed about her to change the subject. Small details you’d noticed; a pretty necklace, some new earrings, a new hairstyle or the way her makeup looked. Sometimes her mood stood out to you, had you curious. She’d soon forget about her self-imposed debt, getting caught up in the excitment of whatever had caught your attention that day.

“I like your glasses today. How many pairs do you have?” You asked after she sighed out your name. “This is like the fifth pair I’ve seen you wear.”

“Thank you. I have a few. Even more back home.” She said, making you raise an eyebrow.

Her answer was shorter than usual. No spilling over to another subject that your question reminded her of. No squealing about where she got them from, holding your arm as she practically begged for you to come check the small store out with her next time.

Her hands stayed put in her pockets, below the sweater you’d asked about a few weeks ago. It looked comfortable and cozy, and she seemed to grow fond of it based on the way she pulled her hands into the sleeves so often.

“Do they even help you see?” You asked, joking around in an attempt to pull a little more out of her.

“Only two of them do. These aren’t one of them, though.” She giggled to herself, and you could only shake your head at her absurdity.

“Do you even want to pass?” You chuckled as the machine made all kinds of mechanical noises, signaling that the coffee was ready.

She rolled her eyes, getting her hands out of her pockets to grab the cup from yours. The heat emanating from it was the last thing she needed on this fair weather day, but the taste of that coffee was just too good to pass on.

The taste wasn’t the only thing that pushed her to accept each and every one of the cups you offered her. She didn’t even pay attention to it at first, but as time went on, she started looking forward to it. Sometimes to the point of craving it.

Caffeine was dangerous, sure, but she’d come to realise it wasn’t what she had become addicted to.

“How long are you going to keep this up?”

She broke the small silence that had taken its place between the two of you. One of your favorite songs was playing at a faint volume from the airpods you were still sharing, filling in for the lack of words. Your mind had drifted off, long gone and barely listening to your favorite melody as thoughts of her occupied the back of it.

The sound of her voice brought you back, all conscious and hiding how crazy you felt thinking about someone standing right next to you.

A curious hum resonated from your chest, and your eyes met her questioning ones.

“The coffee. When are you gonna let me pay you back?” She asked, and you smiled.

“You don’t need to.”

“But I want to. You spent like a hundred dollars since the beginning of the year.” She frowned.

“That’s a bit excessive. I’d say 30 dollars at the most. It’s really cheap coffee.” You pointed out.

It took everything in her not to call you a smartass. It seemed like a terrible way to confess her feelings. Especially when what she felt, the light she saw you in painted you as far more than a smartass. The opposite, or maybe a more positive and kind alternative.

“You really don’t want me to pay you back?” She insisted, and you shook your head, amused.

This wasn’t the first time she was asking, and you didn’t expect it to be the last, but your answer would remain the same.

You didn’t want her money.

“You could at least admit you want something in return.”

Her words wiped the delectation right off your face. The lighthearted atmosphere suddenly vanished, replaced by a heavy and uncomfortable one.

You had trouble finding the right way to breathe, scared it would shift the conversation into a much too unpredictable path.

“Wh—what?” You stuttered, furrowing your eyebrows in the most natural way you could.

Yunjin wasn’t having it, although in a simpler moment she would have laughed at your poor attempt.

“Come on, Y/n.” She probed. “No one gives out that many compliments out of pure kindness only.”

“There probably are a few people—” You started, but the way she stared at you kept you from rambling further.

There was no escaping it, she obviously knew what was going on. In theory, you couldn’t be surprised as you hoped for your actions to be obvious, or at the least for her to notice them.

Now that she did, you weren’t sure what to do. Hell, you didn’t even know where or how to stand anymore, you hadn’t thought that far ahead.

“Well—I mean, I kind of have been doing this to get to know you a little more.” You mumbled.

One of her eyebrows furrowed, and you sighed. This wasn’t exactly ideal for the embarrassment you felt.

“We’ve been friends for months, is it so difficult to do that? Am I that hard to read?” She wondered, amused.

“I don’t know, it feels easier this way… For me at least.” You looked down, eyes sweeping the floor as you did your best to avoid her gaze.

Embarrassed was only the start to describing how this whole thing made you feel. Everything you did, everything you told and asked her in order to find out more, as sincere and truthful it all was… It all seemed so silly. Collecting all those bits of her personnality, of her mind; piecing them all together in sercret and falling behind closed doors…

What was the point of putting yourself through so much if it would all come to light anyway?

Would it even be worth it?

“Right. Well…” She trailed off, and your eyes were pulled by the sudden movement of her hand between the two of you.

You watched as it hesitantly approached yours, waiting to see if it would welcome it only for you to wrap your fingers around her palm in a heartbeat— that was to say it happened fast as your heart had picked up the pace for a while now.

Yunjin kept her smile to herself, hiding her appreciation behind treacherous eyes that she focused on your joined hands. The spark she held in her gaze whenever she looked at you was hard to erase—she couldn’t believe you hadn’t noticed it.

“Let your wallet rest a bit.” She joked, finally looking up at you. “Whatever you want to know, next time you can just ask.”

“Do you like me?”

“Oh.” Her eyebrows raised in surprise as you shared a laugh over the sudden, bold question.

It wasn’t exactly unlike you, but judging on the past couple minutes, neither of you really expected it.

“I do like you.” She admitted, a shy smile letting you know she wasn’t as cool about it as she tried to be before adding. “When you’re not nagging me about finals.”

“If this is one of your ways to get out of studying I’m gonna be so mad.” You half-joked.

It would be a pretty insane thing to pull, but you wouldn’t put it past her. She loved to avoid schoolwork, no matter the excuse.

“If it was I wouldn’t ask you to get back to it.”

“You haven’t.”

“I am now.” She smiled, tugging on your hand the same way she had to bring you here.

You could only follow as she jogged back to your study room. Whether her excitment came from studying or the progression of your relationship, you had a small idea. It put a smile on your face that you wouldn’t be able to get rid of for as long as she was the one holding your hand.

And wherever she’d lead you, you’d follow.

[the---hermit]

Studying in the kitchen and the tiny bat my brother got me, aka my new emotional support lil guy

27|12|2023

I took a couple of days break for family celebration purposes but now I am back to my studying and I very resentful about it. I wanted to take the full week off, but since I was sick last week and couldn't study for some days I now have so much to do before my exams in January and February. I will try to squeeze in a few more rest days, but before that I am trying to power through the book I am studying right now. The other goal is to try to see my bestie as much as I can since she won't be here for long. I have already spent time with her family on christmas day, as it is a tradition of ours for me to spend the late afternoon and evening at her place every year. And tomorrow, tho I plan to have a full day of studying, we should be able to spend time together in the late afternoon and evening. I am feeling quite energized even though I am annoyed I am stuck studying instead of minding my own business for a whole week. Today I read and highlighted almost two chapters and wrote down notes for almost everything I read today. I decided that this week in the mornings I will try to get as much reading done as I can and in the afternoon I will focus on writing notes down. This is the best way for me to follow my natural energy levels during the day and make the best of my time. I cannot wait to be done with this thing. I should also start setting up my journals for next year, but I have not been able to do that yet.

calm hobbit winter activities and productivity:

read first thing in the morning (I am still reading Bookshops and Bonedust and you know what? I am not enjoying it as much as I expected. I am really struggling to get to the end, the cozy element feels a bit forced in this one compared to Legends and Lattes and the books should have definitely been shorter. I never thought I'd say it but I cannot wait for this book to be over and to move on to something else)

daily Irish practice on duolingo (and today I did a lot and felt very productive in this sense, working on duolingo in the early morning is definitely the best option for me, I need to keep it in mind)

read and highlighted two chapters of my book and annotated (almost) everything

updated my reading journal

started to outline my 2024 goals

wrote a couple of book reviews

mindless drawing while drinking herbal tea to calm my brain

📖: Bookshops and Bonedust by Travis Baldree, Nature Human Nature And Human Diversity by Justin Smith

[sacharinee]

peter moments part three!

pairing: peter parker x reader

w/c: 1918

a/n: hi i hope u guys r having a great new year so far :) i kept this in the drafts for weeks and im throwing it out here now. school is back up so im sad again but i hope u guys r all well <3 enjoy!

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

you not knowing your own boyfriend is new york’s friendly neighborhood spider-man has to be the funniest thing ever to peter. 

it started sophomore year when you and peter had teensy crushes on each other. you and he often had study dates at one another’s. however, this usually ended up with you falling asleep halfway and him having to pull an all-nighter to teach you the topics of your exam.

peter is hard at work at your desk, preparing for the calc midterm you two had the next day. while you were supposed to be studying, you found comfort on your bed, watching youtube videos of crazy spider boy sightings in queens instead. it wasn’t your fault anyways; the viral footage of the superhero is all that everyone’s talking about recently.

“pete,” you called out. he doesn’t budge when you call his name, still scribbling math formulas you don’t even want to attempt to understand. 

“peterrr,” you singsonged. he drops his pencil and sniffles, turning your swivel chair around to face you, “what’s up?”

“y-yea i’m fine” he answers with a reassuring smile. you don’t know what it is about him recently but you can tell something is off with him; he’s leaving school early, arriving late, and completely exhausted for your study nights, and he seems to be on edge whenever you’re around.

you usually berated him, advising him to take some of the load off and spend some more time for himself, even supporting his decision in quitting band. although, you think your guidance has something to do with your feelings of loneliness and detachment away from peter. 

“okayyy,” you draw out unconvinced, “well, have you seen that new clip of the weird spider thingy? it’s crazy! look at it,” you shove your phone in his face. you don’t notice the way he smiles at you in secret, peter thinks it’s adorable how excited and easily distracted you get. but he knows it's going to be the death of him when you call at 3 am asking him to explain the concept of derivatives for your shared calc exam. 

he’s hesitant to look away from your face. you’re in such awe when you stare with wide eyes and mouth agape at your screen, he thinks you’re the prettiest.

when his attention does fall on your phone, he’s quick to realize what clip of his alter ego is playing and abruptly grabs the device, shutting it off. “hey! what are y-” “you know that’s all fake right? it’s all done on a computer?” “what? no, it’s not. look at him!” 

“i’m looking and it seems like it’s all cgi to me.” peter’s doing anything he can to deter you in the wrong direction, anything he can grasp. 

“well cgi or not, i think he’s so hot,” you defend. “i mean, can you believe it? with his bare hands! how much does that car weigh? has to be like a few thousand pounds, right? and the speed it's going at? oh my god, he’s so strong.” you gush.

you miss the way peter’s face glows like fire. he’s red, really red. all blushing and trying to control his breathing. you think he’s hot? him? and strong too? 

it’s times like these when peter struggles to compose himself and resists telling you the truth. he takes a deep breath, pinches his nose bridges, and opens his mouth, “actually, y/n/n, um”

you cut him off, grabbing your phone back, “it’s so crazy. i heard he’s out every night fighting bad guys and everything. i hope he has someone taking care of him too.”

peter stands there, mouth open, unsure of what to do next. he realizes you’re right, telling you would be selfish, and he can’t risk putting you in danger. 

he purses his lips in disappointment and looks back at you. you’re in your previous position, laying down with one leg over the other while you hold your phone close up watching spider-man do backflips for new york citizens. you don’t have a single care in the world. and peter would like to keep it that way. 

so he bites his tongue and goes back to studying.

—

a few days later, you and peter arrive back to your room after school. 

“thanks for staying up all night with me the other day. i really didn’t know what was going on calc,” you graciously thank him. peter was running on a two-hour power nap before he took that midterm with you, but it was worth it when you came rushing to him, squealing with excitement. you tackled him with a big hug, showing him your exam with a b- written in red marker proudly.  

“of course,” he blushes. peter always makes time for you, even if it gets too inconvenient for him. 

he makes his way into your room dropping his bag by your door and walks over to your bed to rest, “i’m really proud of you, you know? that test was hard and ms. warren didn’t even curve-” peter stops dead in his tracks when he sees what’s laying on your bed. 

a miniature spider-man plush decorates your comfy mattress. 

“what’s wrong?” you come up behind him. you cleaned your room this morning knowing you and peter would be hanging out later on so it shouldn’t be too messy. 

peter laughs, “you uh, you sleep with that thing?” pointing to your beloved plush. you quickly grab it in its defense, “yea, so what?” you have an adorably angry look on your face which peter knows all too well.

he smiles at you, “n-nothing. it’s cute.”

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

it only got worse as time went on. 

you rush through harry’s front door; his lavish loft that his father bought for him to keep the two of them separated, was often used for your friend group to hang out at. your friends, harry, mj, ned, betty, and peter were all waiting for you to arrive, and you were running late due to an unexpected emergency stop. 

“oh my god, finally. we’re starving, where were you?” ned groans. you might’ve kept them waiting with the pizza you promised to bring. peter quickly stands up from the couch and walks towards you, grabbing the large boxes from your hands. he spares you a sweet smile with a kiss on the cheek and whispers a soft greeting to you.

now that peter had the courage to properly ask you to be his girlfriend a couple of months ago, you would think he has the guts to tell you the truth. however, he always decided against it, opting to keep spider-man under the radar when it came to you. it certainly got more difficult when he’d come to your place with a limp and sweaty hair all while you would ask countless questions asking if he was feeling okay or if he ate earlier that day. you’re just a curious person by nature.

“i know, i’m sorry i’m late, buuut…” you leave a dramatic pause. “i was out getting these!”

your friends watch you stumble taking your shoes off and holding it in front of them. all you receive are blank stares and confused faces in return. 

mj’s the first to speak up, “crocs?”

“no, not the crocs,” you walk up closer with your shoes on display, “the spider-man jibbits!” 

your squealing captures peter’s attention when he drops the pizza boxes off on the kitchen counter.

“wait- that’s why you came late? to buy your little jibbits?” harry remarks. “they’re not just any other jibbits, harry, they’re spider-” “yea spider-man, i know.”

ned piques “h-hold on, you do know that-” peter rushes behind you, shaking his head, waving his hands frantically, urging his best friend to shut up silently. 

“that uh, peter is… and he, uhm i-” ned visibly gulps, “i have to use the bathroom.” he hurriedly runs off to what you assume is the restroom and you look at your friends and peter weirdly.

“what’s his problem?” you throw your shoes by the front door and wash your hands, grabbing a plate to put a slice of pizza on top. peter stands there, wide-eyed with flushed cheeks and chest heaving, a tell-tale sign he’s nervous or stressed. everyone on the couch stares back at peter while he stares at wherever ned ran off to. 

you offer him your slice of pizza, “are you okay?” while nodding his head peter gulps too, “mhm.” he gives you an awkward smile and grabs his pizza from you as you take the back of your hand placing it against his neck and then on his forehead. “you’re getting kinda warm, pete. you should drink some more water. i’ll get it for you.”

you go back into the kitchen, fetching him a glass of water while he sits back down on the couch beside his friends. 

“she doesn’t know yet?” mj whispers. “how does she not know?” “even i know you’re spider-man, and that’s saying something” betty teases. 

“it’s,” peter sighs, “it’s complicated.”

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

at this point, your friends began to bet how much longer it would take for you to catch on. they even love fueling your obsession with spider-man, sending tiktoks, edits, and new footage of the superhero. 

it’s a few days after christmas and you and your friends found themselves lounging at harry’s sitting together near the christmas tree. 

“okay y/n,” harry sets his gift in front of you, “your turn.”

this year, you and your friends decided on doing a fun secret santa for each other. you were sad in finding out that you and peter didn’t receive each other, but that didn’t stop you guys from getting personalized gifts for one another. you and your boyfriend are fully clad in matching pj's with santa hats on top of your heads.

“hmmm” you ponder. “is it… keys to a new car? orrr a new phone? ooh! or the new louboutin shoes they released last week?” you hold your present close to you and tap against it while a million ideas rush through your head. harry’s dad is rich; your imagination is unlimited. you once saw harry gift a laptop once for a guy he barely knew. 

“it’s even better.”

you hum in response, carefully digging out the tissue to pull out his mysterious gift. your fingers feel something soft, and you slowly lift it out of the bag. 

“oh my god! no way!” his gift leaves you gasping and jumping in your seat. you hold out your christmas present out in front of you. 

everyone stares at you in puzzlement, “socks?” mj questions.

“only the best socks ever!” you squeal enthusiastically. peter looks at harry dumbfounded, only to find him mischievously smirking back at him. “i’ve gotta go put these on,” you run away excitedly with your gift like a little kid. peter shakes his head in disapproval towards him, your friends giggling at harry’s antics. 

“you better tell her soon man, or someone might think she’s spider-man’s girlfriend, instead.”

“n-no! are you kidding? she can’t know, she’d freak-"

moments later you come back out squealing, showing off your clad feet completely decked out in your brand new spider-man socks. 

[itgirlgyu]

TXT WITH A S/0 WHO IS A MEDICAL STUDENT!

ꞌꞋ ࣪𓂃 ִֶָ 🍅 txt! ot5 x gn! reader. .... word count: 1051.

GENRE: FLUFF, CRACK. this has been REQUESTED!

⿻ YEONJUN..

Always hypes you up for your academics.

Suggests that he would stay up with you to help you study for your tests.

Is already snoring away by the time you get to the second passage.

You let him off the hook because he looks very cute with his cheeks pressed on one of your books and his supple, candied lips jutting out.

But you draw the line immediately when you notice him drooling a little bit and wake him up even though his soft snores were working like your own lofi music.

On self appointed snack duty when you're too overwhelmed by the intense studying or the long hours at the hospital.

Keeps you fed through your busy schedule.

His greeting to you is, "have you eaten?"

Never fails to tell you how amazed he is by your hard working nature and how much it makes him fall in love with you more, and more each passing day.

Does weird things to make you feel better when you're feeling down.

You've once made him wear a bubble pink tutu with a crown and do ballet.

You cherish that video more than your life.

⿻SOOBIN..

Never picks up his call the first time round.

And supposedly you're the busy one.

Nonetheless you keep him around as your boyfriend because he has at least three emergency boxes with written speeches for you at his place in case you have a meltdown and tell him that you're giving up

"Soobin I think I'm gonna g-"

Cue Soobin scrambling to find out the third speech he had hidden in the living room and opening it up to narrate it.

"-o to the bathroom."

Has the audacity to act as though nothing had happened.

Treats you like you're already a doctor by the way he brags about you to anyone that would listen.

He might be a little affected when he can't see your face month after month because of your big examinations but instead tries to make lists of all the things you two can do together when you get time to hang out.

First date is staring at each other's face for three hours.

You bet he's gonna meet you at your last exam at the venue with a bouquet and a rented car to whisk you on a rendezvous.

But not too adventurous.

It's more like going to a new café that opened up with interesting menus.

⿻BEOMGYU..

Some days you loved him—when he would turn up outside the window of your library seat and throw it back while miming the words "i love you" and "you can do it." until he gets chased out by the guard.

And some days you sort of hated him—when he'd have thousands of questions

like my heart skipped a beat, am i dying or am I lovesick because of you?

Constantly.

without an ounce of shame.

Doesn't really care about the time constrainments because if he misses you he'd turn up wherever you are and leave within five minutes after he had his fill of seeing your face.

Is preparing himself to be a trophy husband.

May joke around a lot but he is willing to do anything to support even if you want to quit the studies and pursue something else instead.

Also tries to study with you for your exams and quiz you.

By the third question he has confused himself with those terminologies and needs a break and confesses his newfangled respect for you.

But that doesn't stop from pointing at male genitalia and go, "he peepee" with a dumb smile.

⿻TAEHYUN..

Your number one support system.

But like in a dignified way.

Which means he'd wait for you after your classes and give your peers an intense sense of jealousy.

Words aren't even needed with him.

You could call him and say nothing and he'd be on his way to meet you.

Lots of walking in silence in the park at night holding hands and resting your head on his shoulder.

The only one who follows through his promise to stay with you while studying.

Although sometimes you wish he'd like get bored and leave you alone

Only because he got an spartan style of studying and he ends up looking like an extension of your parents chiding you to study.

Sketching dates with Taehyun!

But instead of drawing cute things—you guys spend time drawing human anatomies.

At first you were irked out but grown to love this quirky little date idea he had come up with.

Isn't the best with verbalizing how much he is proud of you, instead comes to meet you with cut up fruits and little notes with 'you can do it' and littered with little hearts.

Once you start interning at the hospital, he'd try to make more time for you so you rest up because he can tell how daunting your life has become for you after seeing the patients suffering.

⿻HUENING KAI..

Number one support system 2.0.

But the cheerleader kind.

Sends videos of him doing cheerleading choreographies with pompoms to cheer you up but if any of them leaks

he'd disappear off the surface of earth without any words.

Gifted you a plushie with his picture embroidered on it doing his peace signs so you'd feel like he is always with you.

You cried a little but you will be the next one to disappear from earth without a trace if he found out.

Starts off his day by shooting you a text in the morning to help you prepare you for the day with positive vibes.

Like Soobin he has at least three templates of speeches in his head professing how he would support you no matter whichever direction you choose because he knows how hard is the profession you've decided.

But has a more guilty conscience tha Soobin so he at least memorized them off his head.

Always offers his special back rubs when the lover boy senses tingle and notify him of your exhaustion.

He's like, "hmm something tells me you're tired…"

As if cosplaying a panda is something you've done since forever.

Makes too many corny jokes like, "doctor something is wrong with my heart?"

But it's okay because he looks super adorable doing that dumb outdated shit.

©ITGIRLGYU 2023 feedback and reblog is always appreciated!!

PERM' TAGLIST... @full-sunnies @impureperhaps @wonioml @1921choi @ox1-lovesick @forever-in-the-sky2 @minhosdaydreamer

@partywithgyu hopefully you will like it!!!

[cyandreamz]

✭ Apollo Justice✭

Today I decided that I will do more full page drawings of AA characters. Unfortunately I don't think I drew a very good Apollo, but in my defence AA is the frist franchise I've hyperfixated over were I've not only cared about the more than one or two male characters but also have had a few of my favourite characters be male! So I'm much more comfortable drawing female characters (⁠´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`⁠；⁠)

Also I didn't change up his design aside from giving him the brown shoes he has in the AJ: trilogy promotional art instead of black shoes he has in older official art because I like it and it's actually my second fave lawyer suit design (favourite is Diego Armando's suit).

Anyways I've also decided I'll share my hc's for these characters for as long as I do this series :D, because I didn't share hc's for Athena on her post I'll share both Apollo and Athena hc's below, spoilers for AA4-6:

Both Apollo and Athena are trans and both socially transitioned as kids and grew up in trans supportive environments cuz in my mind the AA universe is queer friendly to balance out how dystopian their legal system is.

Apollo has no fashion sense aside from having a surprisingly good eye for men's formal/professional wear. So good in fact that Kristoph wouldn't of hired him if his suit looked bad (cuz he's that petty).

Apollo doesn't see Phoenix as a Dad but does simultaneously see him as a role model (though he'd never admit it) and hate him

he does however see Trucy as a little sister, even before learning she is actually his half sister

Apollo is gay and Athena is lesbian cuz one day I thought "hmmm image if the lawyers were trans and MLM and WLW solidarity?" and than it became a hc :P

I ship Apollo with Klavier and I like to think that Phoenix tries to give Apollo dating advice but Apollo ignores him because his advice is terrible! (Not on purpose, Phoenix is just really bad at relationships but it's works out for him cuz his partners are always just as bad, or somehow even worse at relationships than him)

however unlike Apollo I don't ship Athena with anyone, just don't feel like it lol

Athena met Phoenix in Europe at a park one of the many times Miles had him and Trucy come over to visit, by chance Trucy was doing magic tricks for random people in the park and Athena was one of these people. She was reading a book to study for the bar exam so Phoenix immediately talked to her about law after Trucy's trick.

Athena is fully multilingual (knowing most active European languages) and says non-english words by accident most of time (if she does it on purpose it's always to sound cooler in her opinion).

also I hc Athena as Austic cuz I can >:-)

Widget uses a Voicaloid sound bank, personally I like it imagine it's specifically Oliver because that's funny to me.

Widget also uses a custom OS that Aura Blackquill designed specifically for all the tech she built with Athena's mom.

[everythingpeaches]

In which Remus has needs and Sirius is eager to earn his forgiveness.

The issue with forgiveness is that as soon as it enters the mind as a possibility, it is almost impossible not to act upon it.

Remus wants to be stoic. He wants to draw it out, treat the issue with the severity it deserves and wait for forgiveness to be earned. Remus also has needs.

He still isn't really talking to Sirius, not properly. They all sit together now, the marauders reunited, and they have conversations which include all four of them without Sirius and Remus having to actually talk to one another directly.

Sirius is too grateful for this half-peace that he dare not overstep, dare not push for more. He is quiet and appeasing, rolling over and showing his belly whenever Remus looks his way.

Remus is cold, a little cruel with his words and withholding of emotion. He takes a sort of pleasure in it, like sinking nails into Sirius' skin. It's not healthy for either of them, but it's better than before.

With Sirius present again in his life, Remus is having a hard time with his feelings. His emotional feelings, certainly, but more dangerous still are the more physical desires that are resurfacing after weeks apart, because Sirius is beautiful and even if Remus hates him he also loves him, and he's hormonal and very, very horny.

It's becoming a problem.

Remus isn't sure he even fancied Sirius this much back before they started dating, when it was all longing looks and imagination. He's finding it very difficult to concentrate on anything.

He should really be focusing on his OWL studies, the exams are approaching with alarming speed, but instead he finds himself watching Sirius.

He watches him over the table at meal times, laughing and throwing his head back so that his long pale neck is stretched and exposed. He watched him at quidditch practice, thighs tight around his broom. Worse still is in their dormitory, topless and wet haired. It's driving him insane.

'I've lost my mind,' he says to Lily one day. They're in the library, Remus is supposed to be studying for defence against the dark arts but he can't get past the first sentence in the chapter of his book.

'Perhaps,' Lily says, not looking up from her notes, 'You need to get it out of your system.'

'What do you mean?'

'Well, you two have always been a bit... intense. I know it's still tricky between you, but who knows maybe a bit of rough and ready is what you both need.'

'Lily!' Remus exclaims, heat flushing up his neck. The red head laughs, looking up from her papers with a wicked smile.

'I'm just saying,' she says, going back to scratching away with her quill, 'Sometimes it's easier to talk without words.'

Remus isn't one to ignore good advise, nor is he one to deny himself something he wants for long.

Opportunity arrises earlier than he expected, that very same night when he and Sirius both find themselves alone, hiding in a 2nd floor broom cupboard from Filch. Peter is somewhere under the floorboards, scurrying away on four tiny paws, and James is under the cloak so has no need for a hiding place.

Remus had grabbed Sirius and dragged him into the confined space without really thinking. Now the door was shut, and he was suddenly very aware of how close the other boy was to him.

'Erm,' Sirius says, shifting a little awkwardly, 'I think I'm stood in a bucket.' He shakes his foot and there's a sound like a rattling suit of armer.

'Sh!' Remus hisses, heat crawling up his neck.

'Sorry,' the other boy whispers. 'Are you alright? You're breathing funny.'

'I'm fine,' Remus says quickly. He is trying to focus on anything other than the feel of Sirius' breath on his cheek, or the way the other boy's leg keeps bumping against his own.

'Are you sure, it's just- oh.' Sirius cuts off, leg bumping against something else of Remus'. 'Oh.'

'Shut up,' Remus says. He wants to die.

'I didn't say anything,' Sirius replies, his voice taking on a new tone. 'I can help you with that, if you like?'

He's standing closer than is necessary, even in these very cramped conditions.

'Stop it. I'm still very cross with you.'

'Well then,' Sirius says, voice dark and dangerous, 'Let me earn your forgiveness.'

Remus already knows he is going to give in. He has appalling self control, and Sirius' fingers have started dancing across his hip bone in a way that makes it hard to think.

'This doesn't mean I forgive you.'

'I know.'

He's kissing Remus' neck now.

'I mean... I'm really...' He's not sure what he is trying to say, thought leaving his brain entirely as Sirius' lips come in contact with the soft skin beneath his ear.

'Let me show you how sorry I am,' Sirius says.

'Okay,' Remus replies.

When Lily sees Remus next in the common room, she takes one look at him and bursts out laughing.

'See, I always give the best advice,' she says with a wicked grin.

Remus blushes, but secretly he quite agrees.

[nonexistent-introvert]

Attachments ( Busy pt 2)

Pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader

Word Count: 2.2k

Warnings: angst with comfort, Javier Peña himself, anyth you would expect from narcos, ONE shitty attempt at Spanish im sorry

A/N: wow, i did not realise how long writing takes me these days. Wrote this instead of studying for my exam in two days because procrastination is the time when ideas hit.

this can be read as a standalone (i think?) but would be better with context from pt 1

Busy pt 1

   Javier sat in Calderón’s car. The air was thick with tension. Javier wasn’t an idiot, he just preferred to ignore it. He knew Calderón was accommodating to him, which he appreciated however the trust that should be between them was almost non-existent. Not after Javier confiscated everyone’s devices but Javier wasn’t willing to take any chances today. Even if it came at the price of trust. 

   The sound of paper crinkling annoyed him. He turned in his seat, curious to find the source of the sound. He shot a judgemental look at Feistl who was holding onto a wrinkled piece of paper. Fesitl merely unfolded the paper for Javier to see, revealing a kid’s drawing. A drawing with what Javier presumed was Feistl holding his son’s hand. “My kid gave it to me right before I went on this buy-bust. Some Jamaican took a rip at me, missed by that much, so..” He trailed off, gesturing with his hand just how close the bullet came to hitting him. He peered out of the window, “I rub it for luck ever since.” Feistl admitted, meeting Javier's eyes. Javier looked down at the paper in his hands, his heart tightening with additional burden and he turned away. His thoughts went back to the woman he left back home if he could call his shitty apartment a home anyways. He braced his arm against the window, his index finger resting against his mustache. He remembered the necklace that you had bought him, it had a beautiful ring on the necklace but he never wore it. It was still safely kept in its original box, he had brought it with him here in his luggage even if he refused to put it on. You never said anything about him not wearing the necklace although he did notice the subtle disappointment on your face when your eyes fall onto his bare neck.   The necklace felt too heavy on his hands, he didn’t want to lose it. He didn’t want to stain the shiny metal with blood stains. The image of an unconscious him flashed into his mind, he was afraid that finding the necklace you had bought for him on his corpse would be too much to bear. If he was a more emotionally vulnerable man maybe he would turn back and ask Feistl how he bared to bring such a sentimental item along with him whenever he went. Was he not afraid of losing it or ruining it? Instead, Javier basked in the silence in the car. Reminding himself to focus on the mission instead. He had to make it back to you in one piece after all. 

   Javier Peña was not one to have attachments. Truth be told, he was afraid of them. Afraid that these attachments would become his weaknesses, afraid that these weaknesses would be exploited by the narcos. It was the whole reason why he slept around and stuck to one-night stands than a committed relationship. Having someone who he knew he was willing to jeopardise the entire mission for, it felt like a burden. 

   You weren’t a burden. He knew that. He thinks of himself as more of a burden than you. You have to carry the weight of his crimes, learn to protect yourself and yet you chose him, someone who couldn’t even afford a lazy weekend with you. 

   He pushed these thoughts away as he exited the vehicle. Forcing himself to be the cold DEA agent Peña, he wore it so often that it felt like his second skin. 

   The sound of Javier’s voice scolded you as you walked the streets of Bogotá. If he was here, he would be nagging at you, reminding you of the dangers that lingered in the darkness. You blasted the music louder into your ears, hoping to drown his voice out. Javier isn’t here, as much as you wanted him to be. You were losing your mind staying in the apartment. The news wasn’t filled with gruesome reports about terrorism, the Cali cartel didn’t work that way. However, the lack of information was killing you all the same, and every call scared you. You were terrified of receiving news of Javier all the same. 

    Connie welcomed you to come over any time. Just above the apartment that you shared with Javier. While you appreciate the sentiment, you were never one to share your emotional burdens. “Like poles are supposed to repel, not attract.” Steve had commented once about your relationship with Javier. A comment that earned him a smack from Connie. You supposed he was right, Javier and you were alike in many ways. It was the reason why the both of you had hit it off so well. 

    You shook the thoughts about Javier away, you were supposed to clear your mind. 

    Javier shouted for you, his steps quickening as he searched the apartment for you. “Fuck!” He ran his hands through his hair. It was almost midnight, where the fuck could you have been? His muscles were sore, practically begging him to rest but his panic overridden any kind of exhaustion he was feeling then. He stared at the beer bottles on the table, were you drunk? His worry only grew, he wouldn’t hesitate to use all of the DEA's resources to track you down now. “Por favor (please)” he muttered, praying for your safety. That his job hasn’t cost you your safety. 

    His prayers were answered when the sound of the door opening caught his attention. Javier immediately turned off his phone, the phone that he was about to use to call Steve. 

   “Where have you been?” You swore you were going crazy. His voice was haunting you the moment you stepped into your apartment. “Cariño what happened?” Javier’s voice got louder as he was overwhelmed with emotions. His eyes were on the tear in your pants which revealed a bleeding scrape on your knee. Your eyes met his and you let out a shaky breath. Javier’s back, he came home. 

  “I’m all good. No injuries, no bruises.” He assured.

  Unable to hold back your overwhelming emotions, you pressed yourself against him and kissed him. Javier was quick to reciprocate the kiss, his hands gripping onto your waist. 

Your fingers were tangled in the curls of his hair, his eyes searched for yours as the both of you tried to catch your breaths. “Did something happen?” there was a hint of apprehension in his voice, Javier wouldn’t forgive himself if something did happen to you. You shook your head, “I’m losing my mind.” You vaguely replied. His thumb traced your arms, frowning even more when he traced against a rough patch of skin. Javier gently turned your arm, revealing a burn scar. “I burnt myself when cooking the other day.” you quickly explained, seeing the flames rising in his eyes. Javier shook his head, “Please tell me the truth.” His eyes fell on your bloodied knee. I am Javier, I swear.” His eyes studied you, “I’ve just been so distracted and got so clumsy. I was just so worried.” Javier’s heart shattered at the admission, swallowing down the lump in his throat. “I'm sorry cariño, I’m so sorry.” Javier led you to the couch. He ran off into the kitchen before returning with a first aid kit. 

     “Look how the tables have turned.” You said as Javier kneeled in front of you and prepared to clean the injury on your knee. Javier didn’t say anything, he knew exactly how much pain you go through when you clean his wounds for him. The cracking of his heart at every pained groan and moan was almost too much to bear. If he was so miserable cleaning an injury that you had gotten by accident, he could only imagine the torture you go through knowing the reason he got those injuries was because of his job. 

   “I promised to talk. You have to talk to me too.” He started. Your eyes looked towards the direction of the fridge where the promise he had made to you was still stuck on the front door. “Javi…” Javier didn’t respond, too focused on cleaning the dried blood around the injury. “I’m just so afraid of losing you all the time.” “I always come back home cariño.” Javier sighed. “I’m just afraid of losing you Javi. Both mentally and physically. Sometimes you come back with bandages, wounds and bruises that you try to hide from me. On other days, you come back looking fine but the emotional turmoil has taken its toll on you. On exceptionally bad days you come home with both.” You gripped the cushions of the couch tightly, you knew the words you were admitting to now sounded selfish like you didn’t want to deal with his problems. Javier remained silent, he forced himself to come back home, even if he brought back all the worst parts of himself. He wanted to come home to you so that he didn’t have to make you worry. “Javi, I know that it comes with being a DEA agent. I have come to terms with it when I told you I wanted to pursue this relationship with you. Understanding you doesn’t make me worry any lesser and I will never forgive myself if you gave up on this because of me.” Javier finished up with the scrape on your knee. His brown eyes looking at yours, guilt pooling in his gut. Javier gently lifted your hand and pressed a kiss onto your knuckles before letting his forehead rest against it. A silent apology, even if he can’t promise that he would never let you worry again. 

    “I just wished we are a couple even outside of this house.” There is was, the conclusion that took you so long to figure out. Suddenly, you were glad that you had taken the walk to clear your head. “Cariño, I don’t understand.” He muttered. You inhaled, taking a deep breath to find the right words. “I’ve been out with you more often when we weren’t dating. We talked more when we weren’t dating. You kept in contact with me even if you were across the state.” You listed, frowning slightly. “We seemed more like a couple when we weren’t officially dating.” Javier’s breath stilled, finally understanding your point. Once he started dating you, he drifted. Too afraid that he would put you in danger, afraid that when the narcos saw him getting close to you they would use you against him. He doubted anyone else in the embassy even knew he has a girlfriend other than Steve. “Steve calls home whenever he gets the chance to, the longest he went MIA was 5 days and Connie almost tore his head off for that.” You chuckled weakly as you recalled Connie telling you about it. “Even Pablo kept in contact with his wife when he was on the run.” Javier's fists clenched, it wasn’t nice being compared to Pablo but you were right, even he had sought out ways to keep in contact with his family. If he had almost lost all cool when he couldn’t find you in the apartment just an hour ago, he could only imagine what you felt when he doesn’t return home for weeks without any form of contact. 

    “You go weeks on end without contacting me and you appear at the door like an abandoned puppy. I love you Javi, I really do but I’m losing my mind wondering if you’re even dead or alive. I search for you desperately on news channels in case something happened, every call scares the shit out of me because I’m terrified of receiving bad news about you.”     “I’ll call. I’ll be with you” Javier simply promised, no arguments no nothing. He was so afraid of burying you with his sins, so afraid of losing you that he didn’t even realise that you were slowly slipping from his fingers. He blinked a few times, trying to hold back the tears threatening to fall. You looked at him, unsure of how to feel about his abrupt agreement. “I’m sorry cariño. I really am. I was just afraid that they would see me with you and I’ll…” Javier trailed off, shaking the horrifying thoughts from his mind. He had enough nightmares about things he saw with his two eyes, he didn’t need to add to the list.

   Javier pulled you into his lap, leaning his head against your shoulder while you circled your arms around his neck. Javier was never one for words, his touch was enough to convey his guilt and apologies that he could never express with words. 

  “Ooh Peña, sporting a new look?” Steve whistled upon seeing Javier. Javier grinned, picking up the ring on the necklace that you had bought him. “Needed something bright in my life,” Javier commented on how the ring sparkled lightly under the lights. “She really is bright. Getting you to come around.” Steve stated, knowing exactly where the necklace came from. He always hated Javier for being a stubborn mule. 

   Javier thought back on the grin on your face, the euphoria at seeing the necklace on his neck despite you trying your best to hide it. He smiled, “She really is.” he commented, tracing the ring with his thumb. 

   The necklace represented the promise he made to you, the promise to be with you for better or for worse. 

   When the time is right, he will make that promise official legally as well.

[sarcasticscribbles]

Artschool Dropout

I made a thread about how and why I became an artschool dropout, and want to share it here too. Storytime! It's mainly a highlight of parts I despite in the art worlds; capitalism and superiority. My experience was affected by the environment, and hell was a bad environment

Back in the distance year of 2019 I went to an(community) art college in like the *fancy* part of my area. I lived across the lake on the countryside, so I was not prepared for this environment. Rich people cosplaying poor is the best description. Fancy clothing made to look dirty and no-one wore shoes. It was very networking-vibe, with "omg we HAVE to talk more later" but never doing so. Like nurses energy. To be fair I became more and more non-approachable as time went on.

A good note is that Swedish education is normally free, even uni degrees, but this one cost money. It was that was never addressed or mentioned when I applied; that's on me maybe, but the few friends I had didn't know either. A lot was beaten around the bush when it came to expenses. A big draw for the school was a trip they made to Berlin during a film festival. Once the time came around they mentioned the cost for the trip (which was not mentioned before, I thought it was included) and kinda of shamed people if they wouldn't pay and go. Saying how its a highlight of the education and the few staying behind just watch movies for a week. In addition, the film festival wasn't included in the price, and we would have to pay extra to go. It was supposed to be a week, but two days was for travelling by train.

The price was something I would rather use for a private Berlin trip. It wasn't a lot, but I refused to do it, mainly for how indirect they were with everything. A friend and I said we wouldn't go and a staff complained how they would have to keep the school open just for us.

My classmates weren't an issue, it was the teachers and system, which all just felt like a money laundering scheme. One day we travelled to Stockholm, and we were tasked to go four hours alone, sit and stare at an object and think what it made is feel. Those were the instructions.

Four hours. Alone. Then home.

I and one other instead went to grab a coffee and trash talk. Once the time was up, I just made up on the spot "what it made me feel" and he gave me a job well done. I understand the assignment, but the execution from the teacher was all wrong.

It wasn't my crowd tho, I came from a gaming development High school while these people were like, social studies. I'm used to a nerdy crowd, is what I'm trying to say.

I have two funny examples:

I was talking to some guy during a break the ice get together with the whole school (very small school) and I explained I studied video game development before, and he said "omg that's so cool!!" And I answered, "yeah! Do you play?" And he said "yes, the piano :)"

And other time we were talking about painters, and when they asked me who my favourite was, I thought I would joke and said "oh, donatello :) because I love purple" and NO ONE got my tmnt ref and instead thought some Italian Renaissance was my favourite artist.

But back to the main issue, it was the school: First day our teacher handed us supplies from a closet and I was like "wow! Thank you! When these run out (BECAUSE WE'RE FKN ARTISTS) can we grab new ones in the closet?" And she said "no :) this is for the two years you are here" Like eight different hardness pens and a block of paper.

My worse experience was that every Tuesday was lecture day (although we didn't have grades nor exams) and all students gathered in a dark room to look at a PowerPoint about culture and people.

Fun in theory, but again executed so badly. My last lecture one teacher said "oh, and we gotten complaint not everyone can take notes during the presentation, so we thought one from each class could take notes and share with everyone else later :)! Any volunteer?"

Like ??? What? I raised my hand and said "you have a PowerPoint there? Why can't just share the presentation with everyone if they want to go back later?" AND SHE ANSWERED "that is a great idea, but unfortunately that would take weeks. So this is a better alternative:)"

TO THIS DAY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE MEANT BY THAT

Smaller details ; expensive lunch, creepy teacher keeping images of women's privates on screen (and I'm an artist I don't mind nudity) pointless activities and little progression. I can't give it a fair judgement, I only lasted three weeks but jumped in the opportunity to leave.

Cherry on top was I had communicated in private with my mentor about quitting and the day it was decided I had to go back to get my stuff and have one last day and the teacher (not my mentor) exclaimed in the shadiest way "Sophie? I thought you quit" I hadn't told my friends yet.

Last day I replaced all my supplies with new from the fancy closet, and me and my friends stole coffee from the cafeteria during lunch (it was only included if you bought food) to celebrate my time. We all hated the system of the school, but all of us loved art.

My experience is mainly the environment the school was located in; upper-class pretending not to be. The people were alright and i got a few friends before quitting. It was also traditional, general art when I prefer digital art. The school, system, and teacher were hell, which is a shame because it took something I loved and turned it into all the things I hate. i don't regret going and I don't regret quitting when I did. Best thing to come out of it was my literal label Artschool Dropout

[quibbs126]

So what if Fire Spirit Cookie and Sea Fairy Cookie do have a child? 

Alright, this is Hot Spring Cookie

“Within the scorching land of Dragon’s Valley, there lie a series of hot springs said to be capable of soothing any injury, some even claiming it grants the Cookies who bathe in it special blessings. However, the springs are not uninhabited, and they are home to the lovely yet fickle Hot Spring Cookie. Born of searing heat and the untamed depths, it is unknown who appeared first, the springs or the Cookie, but she deems herself the guardian of them, and she decides who gets to bathe in them through a series of tests. However no two Cookies go through the same tests; some are remarkably easy and others near impossible, the difficulty being determined only by how much she likes the Cookie and her mood of the day, and whether or not she feels like being entertained. However you cannot force your way to the springs, as no mere Cookie can best her power, so it’s best to simply do as she wishes and hope you catch her on a good day!”

“She claims she cannot leave the springs’ surface, but some claim to have seen her near the coast, very far away from where she claims she cannot leave.”

Okay writing that was pretty fun, I think I might do this more

Alright, so design time. I’m gonna be honest, Hot Spring probably isn’t the best name, but I couldn’t think of a better one that still kept her hot spring theme, so that’s the best I got. Maybe if I come up with a better one I’ll change it

But her name’s hot spring because it’s water that’s hot. Simple as that

Hot springs:

So I kind of just drew her on Monday while sitting with my friend at dinner, instead of studying for my political science exam. But whatever, I did fine on that one. I just kind of started drawing, no rough sketch really needed

Truth be told there’s not really much to say on the design front, I sort of just went with the flow for most of it. I know that I added that cape in because her design felt too plain without something else. It’s supposed to be connected to her dress or something but I didn’t really figure out how, or how it really works at all. I made it red and orange because I wanted to reference the orange streaks, and also Fire Spirit, so that’s what I went with

I was flirting with her having a darker dough tone, but I couldn’t figure something out that worked with the colors, so Sea Fairy’s tone it is

I think the eyes look too small and a bit off. To be honest I’m blaming that on the lighting of the dining hall, I was having trouble seeing the eyes in the sketch. I may change it later

But yeah, that’s about it really. Her design’s probably a bit plain but eh, so are Sea Fairy’s and Fire Spirit’s (though Hot Spring’s might be too plain). But overall I like her and I hope y’all do too

[will41n]

life updates teehee first and the most important part - i passed the entering exams (is it called that?) and succesfully got into a uni i wanted and dorms in a very very nice place. ive never lived in the city before, it's very very exciting. i will miss my dog, but i will try to come back to my hometown to have a little walk with her at least once one or two months. MOVING TOMORROW...

i will be studying graphic design! first and second year also include fine arts, history of my country and the world as a whole. ive never been interesten in history, especially during high school it seemed very boring, but now it seems very exciting, i want to know more.

got my nails done, will maybe show it under the cut (as well as some more info hehehe), my doggo is in the frame as well. finished majority of my commissions from Toyhouse and Discord, so i will be able to draw more cubitos.

As far as i know, we wont have homework in university, so i will have so much more free time. Oh god how much i hated doing my homework for 8 hours a day.

Also. turing 18 this oct. 9th! Im a big boy now! Will be able to buy myself some beer... instead of asking my mom.

Honestly, i dont feel like an adult, at all. I think its a good thing, i want to stay a kid for as long as i can. I can be responsible when needed, but i dont want to always be like that. I want to play toys and draw lil guys :3c

Hope youre all having a good day! As i said, expect more hermitcraft art!

My nails! Im in love with that blue..

If anyones wondering, im moving to Krasnodar! A city in russia :3c

also i saw a goat !!!