#dumping things here because they are so much easier to find in the future

[grailfinders]

Grailfinders #337: Hai Bà Trưng

happy easter y’all, I hope you’re all enjoying your chocolate, eggs, chocolate eggs, and eggs in the shape of chocolate. we’re back at it again with a crisis, both a water monster crisis, and the fact that I can’t really spell the Trưng Sisters’ names right on this keyboard, so from this point on expect me to use the wrong kind of u.

spelling aside, the Trung sisters are a combo of Glory Paladin for their winning attitude and glowy weaponry, as well as an Echo Knight Fighter because… duh. there’s two of ‘em.

check out their build breakdown below the cut, or their characters sheet over here!

next up: “so what’s it like being split into a thousand consciousnesses?” “eh, it has its pros and Cons”

Ancestry & Background

the Trung sisters are probably human, unless you believe in that ascending to the heavens bit, but either way they’re close enough for it to work here. that means they get +1 Strength and +1 Charisma, as well as proficiency with Animal Handling for their elephants and the Ritual Caster feat to actually get those things. with this feat you get two first level wizard spells like Find Familiar and Comprehend Languages that you can ritual cast as many times as you like- the former one of your lil elephant friends, and the latter is the grail translating for you. you can even add new spells to your ritual book if you find them lying around in scrolls or other spell books, so keep an eye out!

also the Trung sisters are Nobles, so they get proficiency in History and Persuasion. if you took a shot every time we released one of these builds with a noble background the only thing that would save your liver is our update schedule. and again, we know noble is a big step down from king, but we do what we can.

Ability Scores

going off the standard array, Charisma should be your highest stat to start out with. it’s literally one of your abilities, and it makes all your paladin stuff extra juicy. second highest is your Strength, since you kill things with spears and swords. R.I.P., Infinitiger. your third highest stat has to be Intelligence since that’s how we qualify for ritual caster, and you definitely know your way around a battlefield. this means our Constitution is lower than I’d like again, but it’s okay for now. the real problem is your low Dexterity making your outfit choices a little difficult to work with, but at least that’s better than your Wisdom. half of you is too busy being a siscon to pay attention when they’re on watch, and you died because your underlings betrayed you. rough.

Class Levels

1. Paladin 1: starting as a paladin gives you proficiency in Wisdom and Charisma saves, as well as Athletics and Insight. despite dumping their wisdom, the Trungs are good leaders and judges of character. paladins also start out with a Divine Sense, letting you pick out extraplanar creatures nearby. you learn their location and what they are, but not who they are. I don’t think the kons are extraplanar, but if they were that would make them so much easier to round up. also if they get chomped on by a fishman you can patch them up with Lay on Hands- you get five HP per day per paladin level, and you can touch someone as an action to either heal them or use five HP to cure a disease of theirs. real useful when you live on a deserted island with no casters.

2. Paladin 2: second level paladins get a Fighting Style, and while Defense would be the smarter choice for +1 AC your spear and sword are both one-handed weapons, so I’m getting the Dueling fighting style instead. that gives you +2 to the damage done with a one-handed weapon every time you hit with it! extra armor might protect you from some damage, but killing will protect you from all future damage!

you also learn Spells which you cast and prepare using your Charisma, but the only spell I really want at this point you’ll get permanently next level so I’ll cover it then. for now, you can also use your spell slots for some Divine Smites- burn a spell slot, deal extra radiant damage when you hit something, deal extra extra damage when you hit a demon or zombie.

3. Paladin 3: third level paladins have Divine Health, so now you can never get sick. anime characters don’t get sick unless they do, and if they do it’s plot related anyway so your DM probably won’t let you off the hook even if you have this.

more importantly, you are now fighting for the Glory of your people, so you get some oath spells! they’re always prepared and they don’t count against your prep limits- Guiding Bolt hits a guy and gives the next person to attack them advantage, and Heroism is the spell I was talking about in level two. with this spell, you can give a creature immunity to being frightened plus some bonus temporary HP every turn for up to a minute!

you also get two Channel Divinity options, and you can use one of those each short rest. you can either become a Peerless Athlete for ten minutes to make up for how spread out your stats are, or you can use an Inspiring Smite to give temporary HP to nearby creatures after you make a divine smite. both of these options use your bonus action, so you can squeeze them into your turns pretty easily right now.

4. Paladin 4: now that you can cast spells you can become an Eldritch Adept using your very first Ability Score Improvement- technically I should save you getting your Armor of Shadows for later to coincide with your third ascension but I’m not going to leave you at 10 AC for the whole dang build. now you can cast Mage Armor on yourself for free, adding 3 to your AC total while unarmored.

5. Paladin 5: fifth level paladins get an Extra Attack each action, so now you can hit twice a turn! I mean. there’s two of you, that tracks. you also get 2nd level spells, including your freebies Enhance Ability, again to overcome stat spread, and Magic Weapon, to make your weapons all glowy for your NP.  they also get +1 all attack rolls and damage rolls.

you can also Find Steed now to give your elephant the boost it needs to be ridable! sure it’s still not elephant sized yet, but you can get it up to a warhorse, that’s pretty neat! also you can use Gentle Repose to keep those water monsters from doing their con-eating trick. they might not be undead, but it keeps them from getting up again so it’s close enough.

6. Fighter 1: we’ve got plenty of Trung now, so let’s work on the sister part. bouncing over to fightergives you a Fighting Style, which means we can take Defense after all! or Dueling if you were smart and took the AC first. speaking of AC, you also get a Second Wind once a short rest, letting you heal up as a bonus action!

7. Fighter 2: second level fighters get an Action Surge, so now you can make a second action with a second attack for a total of four in a single turn!

8. Fighter 3: third level fighters can become Echo Knights, letting them Manifest Echo as a bonus action. this creates a copy of you with better AC and 1 HP that you can move around the battlefield as you wish, as long as it stays within 30’ of you. you can attack from its position as well as your own, and you can even swap places with your sister as a bonus action too!

you can also Unleash Incarnation up to Constitution Modifier times a day, adding an extra echo attack to your attack action! right now that’s only once, but it’ll get better as we go.

thanks to the echo knight’s funky splitting, we can use buffing spells like Magic Weapon and it will improve both sisters’ weapons at the same time!

9. Fighter 4: fourth level fighters get another ASI, so grab the Slasher feat to round up your Strength score as well as protect the precious cons! once a turn you can slow down a creature you hit with slashing damage, and your critical hits force disadvantage on the attack rolls of whatever you sliced through! if you’re going to bring marshmallows to the front lines, it’s best to make sure they don’t die.

10. Fighter 5: fifth level fighters get… nothing! extra attacks don’t stack like that.

11. Fighter 6: as a consolation prize, sixth level fighters get a bonus ASI, so bump up that constitution for 11 points of health (remember that +1 each level is retroactive) and for more unleashed incarnations! now you can attack up to six times in a single turn! that would use up literally every spell slot you have right now, but you can!

12. Paladin 6: sixth level paladins have an Aura of Protection, so everyone around you gets a +3 bonus to all their saves! now your cons won’t get blown up by a fireball… as much. I’m sure a successful save would still get the cons knocked out though.

13. Paladin 7: seventh level glory paladins get an Aura of Alacrity, so everyone around you gets a movement speed boost. again, it’s keeping the cons out of harm’s way!

14. Paladin 8: at eighth level you get another ASI, so bump up your Strength for stronger attacks!

15. Paladin 9: ninth level paladins get third level spells, and you get Haste and Protection from Energy for free! I’m sure you could argue a D&D build would have to be perma-hasted to even stand a chance at keeping up with a servant, but really the only third level spell I want here is Elemental Weapon. in contrast to magical weapon, you still get a +1 bonus to attacking, but the bonus damage is a little stronger, and you can make that damage an elemental type like acid or fire. I’d use cold damage here for their demon slayer-esque water sword attacks. or you could use something like Crusader’s Mantle to give everyone around you mini-smites for up to a minute.

16. Paladin 10: at tenth level your natural leadership abilities give you an Aura of Courage, so nearby creatures can’t be frightened while you’re around. it’s a shame it only has a range of ten feet, that would’ve really come in handy while you were alive.

17. Paladin 11: I hope you like radiant damage, because an eleventh level paladin has an Improved Divine Smite, adding a d8 of the stuff to every melee attack you make. that basically doubles your damage output most of the time- there’s a lot of doubling going on in this build, almost like you’re two people or something.

18. Paladin 12: twelfth level paladins get one last ASI, so bump up that Constitution again to not die! not dying’s my favorite hobby, and I bet its yours too, we have so much in common.

19. Paladin 13: our last level of paladin gets you Compulsion and Freedom of Movement and a bunch of other spells but who cares because it also gets you Find Greater Steed, letting us finally have an elephant-sized elephant. well, actually a rhino-sized elephant but it’s waaay closer than a horse.

20. Fighter 7: our true final level is going back to fighter to become an Echo Avatar. now you can transfer your mind to your sister and basically play as her, with the max range of the echo increasing to 1,000 feet while you do so. this also doesn’t prevent you from switching places with her, so you can trivialize a lot of traps by just sending the more expendable sister ahead of you.

obviously I don’t think this level’s in character, but it’s at least slightly moreso than the next paladin level where you can break curses by touching people, so here it is.

Pros & Cons

Pros:

while I didn’t go over it much in the build itself, Paladin has some nice spells, and unless you’re super dedicated to playing in-character I highly recommend you look at the full spell list before committing to just using spell slots for smiting and elephants. also, ritual caster doesn’t look like much on the surface but if you play your cards right it gives you access to a ridiculous amount of Utility, giving you plenty to do outside of combat. with ritual caster you have access to spells no paladin would ever be able to cast like drawmij’s instant summons, and you can become the party’s communication hub with spells like Contact Other Plane or Skywrite.

you can attack way more in a single turn than a paladin really should be able to, which means you take the paladin’s burst damage potential and crank it all the way up to eleven! with action surge and unleash incarnation, you triple the number of attacks a paladin should ever be able to get, making you a burst damage machine. assuming a regular longsword with elemental weapon on it, you deal 6d8+36 slashing + 25d8 radiant + 6d4 cold, for an average of just under 200 damage in a single round.

 I know this last one isn’t much, but. riding an elephant is so cool y’all, it gets its own section.

Cons:

pretty much all the damage you do is either radiant or physical, so the second you come across something that can handle those two your damage output is completely neutered. I really hope there aren’t any celestial monsters on the islands…

I know paladin spell slots are really, really good for smiting, but as written we aren’t using them for anything else. okay yeah there’s summoning elephants, but that’s still a very small part of what paladins can do- they’ve got plenty of healing spells and defensive buffs they can offer, and while that might not be in-character, it’s a smart tactical decision.

your AC is bad. but you can just wear heavy armor if you feel like it. yeah two of these are just “if you deliberately kneecap yourself, you play worse,” and I’m sorry, but paladin’s a good class, fighter’s a good class, they’re just two great tastes that taste great together. their biggest real weakness is a lack of area of effect spells, but that’s not super punchy, and even then you can slice through six guys like it’s nothing with the only area you’re really affecting being your sword!

[yaoi-reading]

I could write a huge list of thing that russians took away from me.

And one of them is desire to do anything at all. It is fun to write about the most interesting you've read in 2023, because part of it is anticipation to look back at this post years later and compare with your current taste, interests and so on. I can no longer do it. I am not sure will I be alive at the end of this year, or will my city be free and unoccupied, or will Ukraine still exist, or will western politician not push us to sign some agreement with russians-terrorists-occupiers which equals death sentence in the future to all of us. And those ruminating thoughts are quite exhausting. But nonetheless I decided to make the list of the manga that caught my attention in 2023. Previous versions you can find here (2021) and here (2018).

4-gatsu no Tokyo wa by Haru - ok, I've got nostalgic feelings from this manga, the mood, the tropes and the vibe reminded me bl manga of early 2000s but with updated setting and more modern. And I enjoyed it so much.

Play After Call by Ohtako Mame - not a fan of dom-sub universe stories but the art, storytelling, characters and chemistry between them are top notch

Ao no Flag by KAITO - coming of age story about friendship (and love)

Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai by Yoneda Kou - at some point i started unironically to wonder maybe the only valid reason not to die is to read next chapter of my favourite manga. Love love love it to pieces.

Bokura no Micro na Shuumatsu by Marukido Maki - ok, i love Marukido Maki, I could read anything written by her. Maybe it is not the best but I remember reading this story about the end of the world before going to sleep and wondering if I wake up next day and continuing to read it during russian massive missile attacks while hiding in the basement and hearing explosions outside.

Ore wo Shiranai Kyou no Kimi by Tonda Moko - time loop and time travel

Totsukuni no Shoujo by Nagabe - gem from Nagabe and once again manga that I read mostly during air raids in the basement. This manga is licensed and translated into Ukrainian. And I am so happy about it! Great story about loneliness and isolation.

60-okubun no Futari by Denzou - dark and twisted, not something you would usually enjoy but it was rather interesting and reminded me a little bit of Harada's twisted stories.

Joy by Etsuko - somehow I was laughing out loud while reading this manga, got a nostalgic feeling from reading it because somehow it reminded me fluffy shojuo stories of 2000s (though it is bl)

Contradict by Ooshima Kamome - rivalry among students firefighters written by Ooshima Kamome? yes, please. I will read anything by her and will ask for more

Ginmokusei no Shitateya by Mamita - men in suits!

Wizdoms by Nagabe - school of magic with anthropomorphic animals, should I say more?

Another thing that russians took away from me is economical stability and it is quite challenging to support and buy works of my favourite mangakas (the death of bookdepository didn't make it easier) and my plan to finish my collection of Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai is down in the dumps. But if you can please-please-please support mangakas buy their works, merch, etc.

I also want to say thank you to the Armed Forces Of Ukraine. It is the only reason I was able to return to my home last year and continue to live here as normal as possible.

[rednleafff]

Casey J in G?F

More info dump? Yes sir – but this time I'm gonna talk mainly about our beloved Casey j. We all know and love our future boy and wish him the very best life that he can have after all that he went through – BUT – I can't stop thinking about the fact that – he will need probably a looong time to actually settle in, even if he will learn the way of "the simple life of a teenager" – this boy still lost – literally everyone but he also gained them all back – but different – they wont be the same people he once knew because they wont go through the same things – even if their key thing will stay – they still wont be the people he once knew – but they will probably look like them the more they grow up and how difficult is to let go of something when that very something is right Infront of your eyes but  different ? or the survival guilt he must be dealing with? I personally think – he would want to love the simple – less stressful life – but wont be able to – even if he would try to work through his trauma and all – it not something he will ever be able to shake completely - sure he might leave to see the world one day, alone or with someone, and he will get the chance to see thew world he fought tooth and nail to save – and slowly but surely he would learn to love this place, even with it bitter moments. now here it's where I come with Yummi eheh their relationship is actually my favorite – (sorry Leo <3 I love you with all my heart) because – as I see it – When Baby Yummi first joins their family, Casey gets to witness a very familiar behavior from the fam, the parental behavior from Leo, the uncley vibes from the turtles, this baby is basically plays a similar role that was belongs to him back in his time line – he will be a little bit distance from her in the beginning, not on purpose it will just happen- they will share their sweet moments here and there but very few in her first couple of years – until she learns to walk and talk enough that when she gets really clingy to his specifically so he plays along, he really do cares for her, its just – hard- after everything , but then – they share a small moment when she asks him if he's going to join them to some place, he says no cause of reasons, so she claims she won't go either and when asking her why – cause she was so excited to go she will say she wants to go with him cause its always much more fun when he's around – she doesn’t even gives to it much attention, she probably draws or something, but Casey – he think about it a little bit more, Yummi wasn’t present in his time line – she can't because she was created as a result of the Kraang invasion and defeat, and although he saw the world met people that nowadays are alive instead of dead or surviving, saw kids that got the chance to grow up and be born at all – he wasn’t really closed to all that – and maybe that why he didn’t felt a connection to this reality yet? He's always around the people who sometimes he sees the ghost of their past? Other? Self? And he loved them to death don’t get me wrong, but Yummi specifically (up to this point of the story) is the only very closed person to him who doesn’t have "another version of". Casey had to learn to love the world his whole family knew and tried to fight back to save it – but he never had that connection to that world, he was a little bit to stuck in the past, to focus on the ghost of people that wont ever be that it was hard for him to love the present that they all gave him. So – this kid – that little gremlin is one of his first connections to this reality that doesn’t rely on something from his timeline – if that makes sense? It makes sense to me lol. Casey's 20's are ups and down, but from this point forward – I think he will find it much easier to breathe and be present in this timeline. maybe part 2 someday – cause their relationship get's a serious twist when its revealed  and Yummi is part Kraang lol (here are scracps of a comic i worked on but will never finish - it takes place after Yummi's whole - Kraang arc)  

[a-little-lostecho]

Riddle Rosehearts, a Royal student from Wonderland and the next in line to be the future Queen of Hearts. He upholds his family’s duty with the expected strictness of all the Queens before him.

“The fact that people are ever insinuating the idea of going against our predetermined destinies is absolute madness! I swear on my destiny that I will not stop until all the rule breakers are put back in their places.”

Parent(s): The Queen and King of Hearts

Parent’s Story: Alice in Wonderland

Roommate: Azul Ashengrotto. He’s certainly not the worst roommate out of everyone in school… but still. That guy is shady.

Secret Heart’s Desire: ….I’d like to eat things and do things with friends more often.

My “Magic” Touch: My Unique Magic allows me to “Behead” anyone who breaks the rules and block off their magic. It’s rather useful when dealing with all the troublemakers in this school.

Storybook Romance: Romance? Perish the thought. My school work and circulars keep me busy enough as is. Not to mention the troublesome ‘Rebel Uprising’…. Besides… I’ll be married off once the next destined King of Hearts is found, so why does it matter what I want?

“Oh Curses!” Moment: When dealing with… certain troublemakers… it’s difficult to keep my cool. Thankfully I have my friends to help me cool off when I begin to loose my head..

Favorite Subject: Royal Student Council. However Debate is another close contender. Planning things out to better the whole student body is good practice for when I’m to become the next Queen of Hearts.

Least Favorite Subject: General Villainy. I find it rather insulting that people believe I’m a villain. Perhaps if people actually put effort into following the rules then there wouldn’t need to be so many beheadings.

Best Friends Forever After: Trey, Che’nya, and I have known each other since we were little although our relationship hasn’t always been this close… I’m just grateful we get to be together now and partake in the same destiny.

~

PHEW if you read this far, thank you! Searching everything up took a while but i think it was worth it for the look! For a more in-depth explanation,

welcome to the first post (of hopefully many) for the TWST X EAH AU! I’ve seen a handful of fics where they put the eah girls into twisted wonderland but never one in reverse, which is what i’m here to do today! I’m hoping to make this a bigger thing with ALL the twst cast, y’ hear me? ALL of them, including the RSA boys because eah is a school that houses all; villains, heros, royals, rebels, and everything in between! I don’t wanna do all the info dumping rn because i still have to work out some kinks in the story (and i have no idea how to actually format things into posts so any help on that end would be much appreciated) so follow for more!

I’m incredibly hexited ;) about this project so i hope you all look forward to it too!

~

p.s. also perhaps help w au/crossover name ideas? i want smth a bit more striking than just twst x eah au but might keep that if it makes life easier for people to find it perhaps

[gettothestabbing]

Friendship is so underrated

I’ve been having such a great time hanging out with my new friends from work. It took me a long time to learn how to be a good friend, and to find people who were willing to be good friends back. The two people I’ve been getting to know are a girl from Kenya and a boy from Brazil. It’s also just nice to hang out with coworkers close to my age, since many people I work with are in their forties or older.

I mentioned in my last read-more post that I have a crush on my coworker, the Brazilian guy I just mentioned. He knows that I am dating someone from EHarmony (as in, we’ve had two dates and scheduled a third). Yesterday, he came to me and said, “I really want to go to this restaurant with you, since it would be awkward to go alone. But I don’t want to get in the middle of your relationship.”

See, he just got divorced, and his ex-wife was at least emotionally cheating with someone from work, if not actually cheating. So he’s very aware of the need for proper boundaries. I immediately told him, “It’s fine! I already told him about you and he is okay with us hanging out.” I started dating EH-guy around the same time that I started hanging out more with Brazil-guy.

I wish I could just transfer my crush on Brazil-guy to EH-guy. Because EH-guy is very nice! And cute. But we just don’t know each other that well yet. 

At the moment, I’m just trying to ignore the crush and never act on it. We keep boundaries up; we rarely touch each other, and if we do it’s in safe/platonic ways. But it’s harder to ignore just how much better suited Brazil-guy and I are to each other than this EH-guy is. We share the same religion, we have similar though not identical political views, we’re avid non-fiction readers, we’re passionate about our shared profession and what in it needs to change, and we’ve both lost our same-gender parent and been recently dumped. We have so much to talk about that it’s hard to find a stopping point, but silence is also comfortable. Even though English is his third language, I find it easy to understand him, and he’s a wonderful listener.

If he weren’t going through so much right now, and didn’t seem to need a friend so much, I would be trying harder to distance myself from him. I know this extra time with him will only prolong my feelings. But I am being very strict with myself about it. No daydreaming, no touching, and any thought that tends to romance I sharply cut off.

I kind of wish he would indicate an absolute disinterest in me. It might make that strictness easier. I feel that I’ve gotten prettier due to body recomp, better habits, etc. But that doesn’t mean he is or ever will be attracted to me. That’s not how attraction works. I can quietly hope for it, but I would also be so concerned if he wanted to date anyone right now. Like they JUST filed the paperwork. He’s struggling with the idea of being single again. At least he still has the cat and his work friends. We will help him move to a new place for a fresh start next month. Sadly, he’s also transferring roles at work, so we won’t be able to chat there. But maybe this will mean we can hang out more outside of work?

The thing is, I love this friendship. I have never had many friends at one time. It took me some time to make friends since moving here a few years ago. And even though he’s almost everything I’ve been looking for in a husband, I refuse to jeopardize this friendship or make him uncomfortable. I’m trying to live in the moment and focus on non-romantic goals. It’s possible that in a few months or a year, my friend will be interested in dating again, and he might consider me as an option. But I can’t bet on it, nor should I treat our friendship as a waiting stage for that not-so-likely future. 

All I can do is keep working to be good and glorify God. It’s important to bring my desires to God, so that He can purify them and remove those that do not accord to His will. That which it is not right for us to receive, God does not grant. “Desire is prayer; and no loss can occur from trusting God with our desires, that they may be moulded and exalted before they take form in words and in deeds.” (S&H p. 1:11)

[princess-of-the-corner]

how am I having more thoughts on the Cardcaptor!Katsuki thing?

Okay okay some plot notes:

I'm sticking this AU in a weird-ass place! During Katsuki and Izuku's last year of middle school!

So they're not in UA, but this is post-sludge villain so they're a bit weird, Kats is NOT dealing with the trauma well, and Izuku is still training with All Might.

This does mean they're not getting involved in the main plot of bnha yet, but they /can/ run into some characters on the adventures. (Maybe the Heroes are responding to the chaos the Cards make, maybe their future classmates are caught up in said chaos, hell you can toss a villain or two in because some of them might know things about the cards).

Also this is a CC-esque au so similar canon deviations exist. Like Katsuki being transfem but not actually out yet.

Card nonsense kicks off pretty early in.

So I'm imagining that Katsuki is having a Bad Time™ and just wants to be alone for a hot minute. Wanders off during the school day and ends up in some backrooms of the school library. Finds the book with the cards. All the cards except Firey excape(because this one vibes most with her). Kero appears and while Katsuki is like ?????? he gives the plot dump of 'hey! Magic is real! You're destined to deal with this shit!"

Izuku also gets involved because he noticed Katsuki sneaking off, followed like the little fuckin stalker he is, and saw the whole card scattering/Kero infodump thing.

Katsuki and Izuku are in a weird ass place right now because it's post-sludge but pre-ua. So Katsuki is trying to figure out what the fuck is up with Izuku and whether her life is a lie and all that but hasn't really had the push to confront all that. And at first she's pissed at Izuku but Kero is a decent mediator to this situation and it's. it's the first time any kind of adult(as much of an adult as a little cat bear thing is) has kinda. Taken control and firmly but kindly said 'hey knock that shit off' so it's easier for her to really just take a step back and take a breath and actually like. Properly be able to listen to Izuku because again: Kero is saying 'hey the guy was worried about you that's a good thing' instead of 'lmao he's worried about you he thinks you can't handle this show him you can through force!'.

bonus points for Katsuki getting dragged into Izuku's nonsense and finding out 'oh you met mcfucking ALL MIGHT and he's training you as a successor????'. Which. Yeah def spins everything because fuck it All Might is the ultimate authority on right and wrong so if All Might thinks Izuku is a good person worhty of respect Katsuki is switching it up right now. (and feeling guilty for everythig in the past so whoops more of Kero being like 'kid you're FINE!!)

Swinging over to Yue! I mentioned before but he was determined to handle the passing of the torch to a new holder better than the Clow-Sakura transfer he was going in optimistically but GOD he meets Katsuki and is like "THIS??? IS WHAT I HAVE TO DEAL WITH???"

So like. He still does something similar to last time in hiding in plain sight to keep an eye on the new holder. I don't think he'll go full dual personality again because while I love Yukito that's A Lot. But also there's like.... There's not really anyone in Katsuki's life where he could slide in as a 'haha you're not going to question me being here!'.

Which leads to the idea of Yue basically faking being a teacher and is now on the Aldera staff but he's the only sane person in this place and is constantly on the verge of killing his coworkers because holy FUCK how do y'all treat children like this????

All Might gets dragged into this because Izuku has Katsuki meet him and tbh with Izuku helping Katsuki figure out the Card stuff they get into nonsense that's /technically/ vigilantism according to the law but Katsuki is the only one who can deal with the situation.

The actual collecting of the cards happens over that school years so Katsuki has all of them by the time she and Izuku go to UA (and also they're all a bit healthier about things both each other and themselves).

At UA, Katsuki initially tries to keep to just using her Quirk for this shit instead of the cards(though she's become used to using both in tandem). This only works so well beause ofc when bigger threats come out, she's not going to hold back out of some weird 'oh it's not fair to-' no people are in danger she's gonna use everything she has to save them.

So while we don't get someone Eriol-esque crafting situations, the Plot forces her to transform the Cards into her own versions.

[intrepidacious]

time after time: reread edition [2]

series summary: After what starts out as a fairly normal mission, you find yourself stuck in a time loop. Which would already be bad enough in itself if it didn’t also mean having to watch Bucky die over and over again.

pairing: bucky barnes x f!reader

word count: 8.2k

chapter warnings: canon-typical violence, the angst continues, another reminder to read the fic premise; a couple of guest appearances; flashbacks are my establishing shots and i’m going to make it everyone’s problem. please note that my blog is rated 18+. minors dni. ageless/empty blogs will be blocked without warning.

read the full chapter here | series masterlist | reread masterlist

welcome back everyone!! just a reminder that this is a reread of already published chapters, so if you’re new to this story, maybe don't start here. it probably won't make a lot of sense. please be aware that by clicking the read more you’re gonna see spoilers for chapters one and two 💚

twice upon a time – tl;dr:

in the flashback, set sometime during the blip, we see twelve meeting natasha and steve and offer her abilities to the avengers. after a short demonstration of her powers and (non-existant) combat abilities, she’s taken on as a new recruit. twelve accidentally breaks her own nose during training and reveals that her time powers don’t include the ability to heal herself, as she stays the same when going back in time.

in the loop, twelve panics but tries to get through the day again. she attempts to nap on the living room couch, but gets disturbed by alpine and bucky. she settles down on her bedroom floor, but gets yanked to the astral plane and berated over her creation of a time loop by stephen strange. during their third mission, bucky lightly hits his head when getting hit by the explosion and ends up getting shot again when twelve overcompensates for past mission mistakes. she tries talking to sam about the loop, but gets shut down. alpine follows her over to the other couch, making a nap once again impossible; the movie bucky turns on is eerily fitting for their situation. all the way through the chapter, bucky keeps asking her what’s wrong, but she evades his question.

behind the loop

finally!! our first chapter with flashback brackets!!! i’ve really been loving the structure of these because they allow me to give a little more context and background on the characters gradually instead of a long info dump as well as just lighten the mood a little. also, i just love writing nat and steve!! god, i miss them so much.

“And why would we want to have you?” she asked. As if she were interviewing you for a job. Which, technically speaking, she was.

there’s a lot of fun tidbits in this part of the chapter, but i love this one in particular. her nonchalance when meeting this powerful, terrified stranger is just so charming to me.

“Oh, great, am I volunteering?”

steve is … god, steve. sometimes the fact that this fic is canon-compliant (for the most part) absolutely kills me. that’s something i’ve had to wrestle with in every single flashback, and it’s just never getting easier.

back to the loop!! i didn’t talk about the mcfly thing last chapter and that’s mostly because i actually haven’t seen back to the future in many, many years. i do love them, though, and i feel like they’re something sam would enjoy, too. i constantly want to give him more to do in this story but instead i keep sending him off on cap duties. sigh. we love a responsible man.

So it appears you’ve gotten yourself stuck in some macabre version of Groundhog Day. Alright. Cool cool cool. You can work with that, probably. Maybe.

the most unsubtle nod to brooklyn nine-nine ever, but i’d completely forgotten i put it there and i love it. that makes it at least two references to this show over all of my fics now, and i’m probably forgetting something!!

“Did you just kick me?” “I wanted to see if you’re still alive.” “Horrible. I’m quitting. You can go spar with Bucky again.”

what can i say? i love their slightly different banter each and every time. it’s so funny because twelve still hesitates to call sam and bucky her friends in her inner monologue but at the same time—look at them. i love unreliable narration.

also, this is the chapter where i really start leaving gaps to fill in the rest of the day later. it’s just fun to keep some thing that are going to be repeating anyway open for now!! that brings us reveals as glorious as alpine, who couldn’t even feature in the first chapter even though i love her more than life itself. also, i have no idea where i got the headcanon that sam’s allergic to cats, but it’s simply a fact to me.

“What time is it, anyway?” “Thirteen twelve hours.” “Please stop just saying numbers when I ask you that.”

is this me making a dig at military time or the fact that it’s not used in the u.s.? who’s to say. also a fun little twelve reference before the nickname actually gets used in chapter!!

“Last dates played. Friday, July 4th 2025, 07:50 a.m. Playtime: forty-five seconds. Thursday, March 13th 2014, 02:49 a.m. Playtime: one hour, twenty-seven minutes, eighteen seconds. End of record.”

i was so proud of this little inconsequential easter egg at the time!! that date is the day of the winter soldier movie premiere, and i’m pretty sure the amount of times the song got played was the same as the amount of mcu movies that were out at the time the chapter got posted. this is an actually fun fun fact for a change <3

ooh, the astral plane and strange. i’m not gonna lie, i’m pretty sure i’m writing his character a little more sherlock holmesian than he is in canon, but sue me. both are smart assholes in their own rights, and it’s fun to have him and twelve snark at each other. they both just hate every second of being in each other’s vicinity, and i find that hilarious.

Third time’s the charm, right? About as charming as a kick to the face, you think as you find yourself delivering just that.

you know, sometimes "writing for yourself" just means line connectors that will make yourself snicker. and i think that’s beautiful.

Shouldn’t he insist on leaving?

ugh, i love this scene!! i love that no matter how hard she tries, other people (and bucky in particular) will just do things she doesn’t expect, and for reasons that are certainly what i’m telling you within the inner monologue. mhm. surely. (i know i said spoiler-free but i’m giddy. also you’re reading bucky fanfic. you must know.)

trying to tell sam about the loop and him not really taking it seriously here was certainly a choice. i’m not sure i love this when thinking about his character, but it had to happen this way for plot reasons. to be fair to him, he’s hungry and stressed, and the people around him are all weird (affectionate). give him a break fr.

“I just run cold.” “That you do.”

i’m obsessed with them, have i mentioned that? also, fun fact about spellbound, i’m never again mentioning movies i haven’t actually watched within a story again because i did end up watching it and one of the character’s initials were straight up JBB. i wish i could make this up. maybe i’m the one who’s stuck in a time loop. anyway. love alpine, love bucky knowing something’s up but not what it is.

“Don’t be dramatic. She’s made of stronger stuff than that.”

did you catch that one?

You’re made of stronger stuff than your doubts, you know that. (ch 1)

have i mention that i pay attention to a lot of little details? because yeah. i do.

the reveal that twelve stays the same during her redos is probably one of the more essential ones!! i mostly wanted to include this because i haven’t really seen any other time loop stories do it (unless i’m forgetting something) and also because, well, drama is fun.

how it’s going

alas, chapter seven isn’t quite done yet. i’ve written around 2.5k for it, i think, but i find myself once again taking unexpected detours. it’s fine, though. the bonus chapter is mostly done, and it’s actually pretty short for a change. (because spoiler alert, chapters are only gonna get longer from this point. somebody sedate me.)

as you’ve probably seen in my schedule, next week is gonna be an off week for me!!! please manifest me meeting sam wilson in the parks as i will be on holiday this time next friday. which is a much more fun thing to do than getting stuck in a time loop. in the meantime, take care of yourselves and don’t do anything dumb while i’m gone (like getting stuck in a time loop). also please leave a comment on the chapter if you enjoyed it, come scream at me in my inbox etc etc 💚

[always-andromeda]

(Walter white voice) JESSE we must peg Joby Taylor

La Belle Fluer Sauvage

Please and thank you!

Author’s Note | okay. anon. real talk. this request has been intimidating me for so long now. because the thought of pegging my man...intimidates me. like this was a fucking boss battle of a scenario for me to take on because I wanted to do it justice. so enjoy over three thousand words of complete filth. <3

Warnings | smut (MDNI), pegging, dirty talk, reader is an anxious mess, joby is an asshole but he is soft <3, nothing else I can think of!

You guess that it's a good night. He hasn't touched his cigarettes for hours. Normally when you catch him standing outside of whatever motel he and the band choose to haunt when they're stopped on the road, he's smoking, trying to blow away the memory of a bad show.

Lit cigarette between his gloved fingers. Eyes trained on you when he takes a puff. Curled lips as he blows smoke in your face playfully. His chuckle when you lightly punch his shoulder and say, "You're such a dick."

And your eyes practically roll into the back of your head when he replies smugly, "Only for you."  

As much as you pretend to hate the way he prods at you, you love how this has become normal. Very few things with Joby are actually normal. But somehow you find comfort in the certainty of his teasing and needling. At least he isn't bored. Because something tells you that Joby Taylor doesn't like when things get too boring for him.

In theory, it should be a good night. Joby played perfectly. He was actually awake enough to remember his own lyrics and the crowd was so pleased with the band's offerings that they delivered a few encore songs. But you play the words he said to you before going on stage over and over again.

"I need to talk to you tonight. After the show, okay?"

You hadn't been able to keep still for the whole concert. You played with the sleeves of his jacket that he gave you to wear in the cold. You'd chewed the inside of your cheek so badly that you'd began to taste copper and hadn't even noticed. You were too preoccupied with wondering what he could possibly want to say.

And the fact that he played well that night...Joby Taylor is dumping you. On the drive back to the motel, you sit, silent and stoic as his band members joke and laugh. And you practically accepted it as fact when the van pulled up to the motel. You'd told yourself that by the time morning came, you'd be single again. Then you splashed cold water on your face when the thought made you burst out in tears.

He’s been quietly standing outside for at least half an hour. He's pensive; staring out at lights on the highway in the distance.

With nothing he needs to numb, Joby Taylor is stone cold sober when you stick your head out the motel room door, trying to gauge his mood. But with his back facing you, you can't really get a reading based on his relaxed shoulders.

"Are you gonna come back inside? It's getting cold." You try.

"Yeah...I was just thinking about something." he mumbles.

He's bored. That's why he wanted to talk. It's over.

You step out a bit, leaning around the doorframe, arms wrapped around your chest when you ask tentatively, "Didn't you say you wanted to talk tonight?"

Joby chuckles but you find no comfort in the sound. "Oh, yeah." He turns towards you finally. "I was thinking about our future...and...how we're doing now..."

You already feel your eyes welling up. Here it comes.

"I think I'm ready to take our relationship further."

Wait. What?

Your brow furrows. "What do you mean?"

At this, Joby tenses. He takes one of the hands buried in his jacket pocket and rubs his chin, looking thoughtful before he moves forward and brushes past you, entering the room. You barely hear him when he mutters, "It'd be easier if I just showed you."

You watch him go to his suitcase, unzipping it and rifling through one of the mesh pouches on the inside. He pulls out a plastic bag and you can make out some sort of box inside.

Setting it on the bed, Joby nods towards the package. "I got you a present."

Nervously, you creep towards it until you're sitting on the edge of the bed. You stare up at him with big eyes. His pursed lips and small nod encourages you slightly. You reach inside the bag and pull out the box and nearly jump when you see the so-called present.

A dildo and a harness. Both colored hot pink. The smiling blonde woman pictured on the box models it with a lacy bra in a matching color. Thumb running over the picture of the strap-on, your hand begins to shake.

Joby notices and sits beside you, taking the box from you.

"Hey, you don't have to worry about it if it makes you uncomfortable. I just wanted to try something and--"

You interrupt, "You haven't...done that?"

He smiles slightly, "Oh, you could say I have some...experience. Why? You've used one before, right?" His expectant stare fades as you stay silent, staring at the brown carpet below your feet.

“Shit…” he trails off. He’d thought about bringing up the idea for a solid month. Because as much as he wanted it, some deep part of him worried. In all his years living the way he does now, he’d had his fair share of partners. Lots of them. And there was certainly a spectrum of reactions to the idea. Sometimes it was easy and expected; one quick fuck and then he’d be back on the road again. Then there was the other end of the spectrum. Which often featured a partner with the same sort of distant look that you had, contemplating how to let him down gently.

If he’d had even an inkling of doubt over how you’d respond, he never would’ve asked in the first place. But something about how you treated him had told him that you’d be open. You seemed to annoy his sarcasm and his attitude. You also had the uncanny ability to make him feel guilty when he stepped over a line. In a strange way…you softened him. 

That’s when it clicks into place for him. In all his years, he thought he’d seen every reaction. But this is an entirely new one: apprehension.

Oddly enough, he isn’t upset. For some reason, he doesn’t feel that burning disappointment in his belly at the thought of that channel closing off. If anything, he only wants to open it further.

So he gives a little more, “We don’t have to.” He struggles to articulate himself for a few seconds before stuttering, “I-it’s not a present if it won’t be fun for you too.”

As soon as the initial shock wears off, you turn the idea over in your head a few times. One insecurity is replaced with another as you latch onto one word. Experience. Something you don't have.

Suddenly, you're reminded that he's had people before you. People who all probably showed him a better time than you ever could. You could only imagine that wistful smile of his forming at the memory of encounters from long ago. But if it was really that good, wouldn't those people still be around?

As Joby's hand settles on your thigh and gives you a gentle squeeze, it grounds you. He's here. He's got you. And he's bought you a hot pink fucking dick and he wants you to fuck him with it.

Your voice is laced with a shaky whine, "You really trust me, don't you?"

Joby looks at you blankly. "Uh...yeah..." He says it like it's the most obvious thing in the world. Like you hadn't nearly had a breakdown fifteen minutes earlier thinking that he was building up the nerve to say it was over.

You could cry out in relief. Your boyfriend doesn't want to stop fucking you. He wants you to fuck him. And suddenly...it's on the way to becoming a very good day, both for him and you.

Joby helps you put on the harness, making sure to adjust the straps so they're not too tight or too loose. But you throb when he squeezes some lube on his hand and wraps it around the length of the plastic cock.

As he coats you with the liquid, he ducks down, whispering in your ear with a raspy tone, "There you go, princess. You're all wet now."

And you are. But you have a feeling he's talking about the dildo. Or he could be talking about the heat between your thighs. Though you can feel his smirk on your skin as he kisses your neck, you can't be sure if he has any clue how dizzy you feel. Your hand only has a few seconds to weave through the hair at the nape of his neck, grounding you, before he gives you a small kiss.

"You can do it. I know you can. I do it to you all the time." he teases.

You sound like you're in another universe entirely when you say, "You're such a dick."

But you see his snarky reply coming from miles away. "Only for you." It has you melting in an instant.

Joby takes his place, kneeled on the bed and slightly leaned forward. With his hands braced on the headboard, you're face to face with his back once more. Usually you're more acquainted with the snake tattoo that coils on his chest. But now you get to see every edge of the word Trouble etched across his shoulder blades in ink. You trail your fingers down his spine, watching the way his breath catches slightly when you reach the curve of his ass.

You'd be lying if you said you hadn't thought about him being in this kind of position before. You never would've believed that he'd actually want it too. Nevertheless, you're grateful to have him when he shudders as you slowly slide a finger inside of him, testing the waters.

"Does that feel okay?" you ask.

Joby nods slightly, keeping his breathing steady. For some reason, like aching bones before a storm, he gets the feeling that he's in for something bigger than he can even fathom. He feels it in the small pit that's already forming in his stomach. His cock stands on end and, fuck, it's begging to be touched. But he abstains from easing it and keeps his fingers curled around the headboard, jagged fingernail close to digging into the wood.

You add another finger and give him slow strokes. And as much as you're preparing him, you're also preparing yourself for the inevitable point where you'd have to actually fuck him. The dildo is a little smaller than he is--you'd guess around five inches--and a bit thicker than him.

You wonder how he came around to choosing this one. Because even though he said it was yours, you assume he chose what he was comfortable with; something he's used before. As you slide your fingers out of him and hesitantly grab onto the strap, you try not to think about how many times he's done this exact routine. You try to push away the pressure of expectations and the idea of being boring. Because this most certainly isn't boring for you.

The thought emboldens you ever so slightly. So you rub the tip up and down between his cheeks and watch the back of his thighs go tight with anticipation.

Through gritted teeth, Joby says, "Are you gonna...are you gonna do it or not?"

His obvious impatience and the way his pale skin flushes with the most beautiful, delicate pink hue you've ever seen makes you giggle. "Give me a second, baby." You taunt, "You'll get it soon."

You go a little further, nudging at his hole before pushing forward. You guide the length along inch by inch and hold onto his hip, keeping him in place as he starts to shake.

Joby lets out a symphony of soft, croaking moans as he adapts to the stretch and holds on all the more onto the headboard. His brain seems to be suffocating under the weight of the moment.

Just to let some of the steam out, he blurts out, "Say something...fuckin'...fuckin' talk to me..."

You cycle through every bit of dirty talk you can remember him using. Sputtered words, spoken in the heat of the moment through clenched teeth all flood your head and you manage to gasp out, "You're such a good boy, taking all of me like this."

You swear you've heard him say it before. But your mind is so jumbled that you can barely think of the specifics. You can only think about the sensations as you begin to move. Your hips snapping back and forth as you manage to fuck him so deep with a stroke that his ass slaps against the faux leather. The strangled groan he lets out at your words. And then one little word that he repeats like a chorus.

Harder.

Something about that gets you more than anything else. It gives you the gall to take more control. One arm wrapping around him, you pull him flush to you. With your other hand, you wrap it around his throat and apply light pressure, just until you hear him begin to choke.

You can practically hear his smile as he chuckles as he says through a sharp gasp, "There you go...good girl..." The simple praise makes your heart swell happily. 

Joby's head falls back on you slightly. His ear within proximity to your mouth and your head finally starting to screw on just right, you take the chance to wind him up more.

"I bet you haven't been fucked like this before, huh?"

Joby struggles to speak. He simply shakes his head and lets out little groans through his agape mouth.

"Can you use your words for me, baby?"

You decide that you love prodding at him just as much as he does when he sputters hoarsely, "No..."

"That's right." You're breathless pounding into him and trying to keep him steady. "I'm the only one who can get you like this."

He repeats your words dumbly, "You're the only one...only-- Only one..."

You feel his lower half start to convulse and get an idea. Now that he's let you in this far, you don't want to be leaving anytime soon. You release his hip from your grip and form a tight fist around his twitching cock. Joby reacts immediately with a sharp inhale and a loud moan.

Pumping him slowly, you hiss, "Who do you belong to? Tell me who you belong to and then you can cum, baby."

You never imagined you'd get to see him this flustered. And you can't even begin to imagine what must be swirling through his head with the almost overwhelming stimulation. But you need to hear it. You need it like you need his teasing; need it like you need to breathe in his clouds of putrid cigarette smoke. He can become your oxygen, you decide. 

Joby hesitates, only able to manage some incoherent babble that makes you so proud that you nearly let him off the hook. But you cease tugging at his cock anyways, meeting his defiance with swift consequences.

You don't feed into how he desperately bucks his hips, searching for friction to ease his aching cock, "C'mon, Joby, I know you can say it. Who do you belong to?"

His eyes are creased and close to weepy when he finally answers, "You...fuck-- I b-belong to...to you..."

Your grip tightens and you continue your ministrations, faster now than ever. Your voice softens, "Good job! You're all mine. Let me take care of you now"

Already beginning to turn to jelly, Joby's eyes close as he whimpers, "Please...please...just let me-- fuck..." his brows knit together, concentrating on the electric pleasure coursing in his belly.

The fullness inside him and the ache of his leaking cock laces together, all tasting the same to him: bitter in the back of his throat and brewing into a crescendo that he doesn't think he's ever felt before, not all at once like this. He thinks he might be fine with being on his knees for the rest of his life if this was what was coming to him.

Keeping your tone sickly sweet, you coo against his ear, "I know. You can finish now, honey. Just let it go, it's okay."

Just like that, he's there, hips spasming into your hand as he fucks himself through the high. And Joby swears that he's never seen himself spill so much as his load paints the comforter. You stay sheathed inside him, holding him close and jerking the last few drops of seed from his already softening cock.

Joby's never looked this pretty, so wrecked and limp all because of you. He whines when you pull out of him and take off the harness, letting it fall to the floor. Though you know that you'll be eagerly awaiting the next time you get to put it on.

You tap Joby's thigh, signaling him to get off the bed and his legs shake as he tries to support himself when he stands. Removing the ruined comfort from the mattress, you hope that whatever washers the motel uses will be able to wash out the cum that's already starting to stain the blanket.

When you peel back the white sheets, you get in bed and pat the spot beside you. Joby follows the order but the surprise barely registers when you curl into his side. He doesn't even have the mind to say something snarky. If he did, he thinks he'd remark something like, "You're gonna fuck me like that and then want to cuddle?"

But really, all he can fully conceptualize is his gratefulness for your sensitivity. He was no stranger whatsoever to the rough treatment; to choking, biting, hair pulling, spanking, and almost any other kind of physical touch. Any other touch aside from this. His eyes droop as he realizes that it's been so long since he's had someone stay. So long that he can't even remember the last time.

Or maybe he's so fucked out that he can't make himself remember. He figures it doesn't matter either way. Because at least you're there. That's good enough of a thought to consume his swirling head. That and how proud he is that he got up the courage to suggest this in the first place.

You look up at him from your spot on his bare chest. "Today was a good day, right?"

Joby isn't thinking about the show or the encore or the fans who screamed his name hours before when he answers. His eyes are focused entirely on your fingers, tracing over the snake head on his chest softly. God, is he ever so glad he got you that present.

He replies faintly, "Yeah...a fuckin' great day."

[sholiofic]

Helloo I love your fics a crap ton and was inspired to start writing again after a couple years bcs of your fics and how great they were. The one I’m working on at the moment is a bit of a monster in terms of length and complexity but I would reAlly prefer if it wasn’t. I find that I get bogged down by detail a lot and have trouble streamlining the plot. Do you have any tips for resolving main plots/conflicts and sort of trimming the fat, so to speak? Once again, excellent fics, keep up the good work, thank so much

Hello! I'm so delighted and flattered that my fics inspired you to write. I hope you keep it up!! <3333

Honestly, I don't know if I'm the best person to ask for helpful advice because I have this problem too. 😂 But here are some things that are helpful for me:

Subplots can always come out and be their own fics. So can individual events (like, say, if you have a whole digression with someone getting a fever right after they broke their leg, you could just take out the fever and let it be its own fever-fic so it can grow and expand and not be taking over this one where it doesn't really fit). Sometimes when I'm really struggling with a fic that feels floppy and bloated, or like the different subplots are disconnected from each other, it's actually that it needs to have some parts of it taken out and made into their own story or incorporated into other ideas that I have. This is also psychologically easier than simply cutting them, because if you feel that it's this fic or the delete key, then you don't want to cut out things you genuinely like - but if you're only cutting them to put them somewhere else, it's easier.

Aftermath can also be its own fic. One thing I struggle with often is that simple ideas just get epic at the end, but actually, as long as the main plot is tied up, you can just cut it off at some kind of punchy ending, take all those bits of aftermath and dump them into a fic where the aftermath is the entire story.

It's also helpful to go back and look at why you wanted to write this fic in the first place. If it's a specific emotionally punchy scene, an image, a casefic idea, etc - then this can help you see where you might have gone off track and started writing a story that isn't really the story you wanted to tell. Then you can cut out the parts that aren't getting you to the part you really wanted to write (perhaps saving them for something else in the future).

You don't have to know the end when you start (although it helps, but tbh I often don't), buuuut if you are starting to flounder, that's a good time to stop and decide what the ending is going to be, and then start gearing the rest of it towards that ending. If, say, you've decided now that you've thought about it that this is all headed toward a dramatic confrontation at the Eiffel Tower, and they've gone off on a side trip to Mozambique, can you just have the Mozambique thing happen in Paris so they're already where they need to be and you don't need to spend extra time getting them there?

Oh! That reminds me of a useful trick, which is making sure (within reason) that you don't have characters do the same thing twice when they only need to do it once. Going to and from locations is a particular source of dragging down your plot. Basically - you have a character do a thing at their apartment, and then they have to go somewhere else for more Plot Stuff to happen, but then they need to pack for their upcoming trip (or deal with a Plot Thing that's at the apartment, or whatever), so you realize they have to go back to their apartment and do that. You can actually cut a *lot* of plot deadweight by minimizing scene changes, within reason, of course, but it feels tighter and more streamlined if you have the character do everything they need to do, or have everything happen to them that needs to happen, while they're already in the location, rather than going back to it later. This also applies to similar scenes of other types - like, if you're going to have two knife fights, can you combine them into just one knife fight that does everything the two separate scenes needed to do?

I hope you come back and see this, anon, and I also hope it helps! Good luck with your writing. :)

[madaboutmunson]

Let me hear you speaking just for me - Part A

This was a pretty long chapter so I've split it in two just for ease of reading :)

I Think I Could Have Been Someone - Chapter 7a

Ao3 Link

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Link to fic overview and all parts

Chapter Summary: Eddie gets the chance to interview Steve for his book.

Author Notes: This is a mature story, definitely 18+ only.

Tags/Warnings: rockstar!AU; band; touring; music industry; alternate universe; drug usage; alcohol abuse; performing; enemies to lovers; road trip; stobin; platonic stobin; platonic with a capital P;

Word Count: 5.9K ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

He'd thought about it. Digging his heels in again. Demanding to fly commercial. So that he wouldn't end up trapped on there with Harrington and whatever set of groupies he was going to use for in-flight entertainment. But Marney had said he was willing to give the entire flight time to Eddie's project. 

Eddie had been collecting candids and quotes and diary entries for years now from bands that only played their local bar to multi-platinum artists. His hypothesis was this. Money can buy luxury, and it can make things easier. It can push people to succeed or keep pushing on, but nothing moves a musician more than the music itself. All he had to do was gather the evidence, lay it out nicely, and boom! Perfect coffee table book. Though he loathed Harrington, he wasn't stupid. His fans would buy Eddie's book simply for the exclusive shots and interviews. And Harrington had just given him a whole hour, no questions asked, apparently. Maybe it was another masked apology for their meeting?

Like his therapist has said to him repeatedly, he didn't have to forgive him, but if he could find a way to let go of all this anger towards a stranger, he could find a little more peace. The world was a tough enough place as it is.

After all, how much should Eddie be allowed to hate the guy if he doesn't even know what he did? And after the last two weeks, Eddie has been wondering how much control Harrington has over the asteroid bombardment that happens to things pulled into his orbit.

A day after their meeting, a grainy picture of himself leaving Harrington's house, hilariously labelled him as a mystery woman, had started making the rounds online. Some fans of his must have worked it out because a few days later, he started getting notifications from his old Munson Photography account, thousands of them asking the same thing. Was he finally going to work with Harrington? As the messages started to pour in, the fear that curled around his spine had almost induced waking nightmare recollections of his life falling apart around him. He didn't respond to any of them, but that didn't stop the barrage. If anything, it amplified the situation. Groups of people, girls mainly, positioned around his usual daily haunts. The studio, the coffee shop, the local bar, the laundromat, occasionally surreptitiously, one would snap a photo of him with their phone. He'd just repeat the amount of money he was going to get paid over and over in his head. He'd even had his bins and mailbox rifled through. Soon, they had him tracked all over, and he was extremely glad all his socials were already set to private. Requests appearing on his other social media profiles were all declined. He decided that if this project went well, we'd start up a new public account and dump all the Harrington in dribs and drabs and, hopefully, future stuff there, too.

Eddie wasn't sure if it was because he'd gotten laid recently, if he was excited to get back to doing what he loved, or if it was because he had a golden opportunity, but whatever it was, he wasn't feeling so concerned.

The driver had picked him up from the hotel, which was only a ten-minute walk away, but he supposed someone might have had a few questions if he had just strolled out onto the tarmac here. He'd been ushered to the plane immediately, which was odd because he could still see the pool of photographers waiting in their strategically placed pens. A few snapped at him as he boarded, which was pretty unnerving as he definitely preferred being on the other side of the camera. Luckily, Marney had advised him as such, and he'd taken a little more care of his appearance this morning. He turned down the idea of sunglasses this early in the morning, though they had been recommended.

Once inside, he'd realise Harrington wasn't early because he wasn't on the plane. So Eddie takes the opportunity to unpack his camera and head back down the stairs to the runway. He hides behind the staircase to avoid invading the other photographers' shots. He had access they didn't, but he didn't want to be a complete asshole about it. He said he'd be here on the hour, so Eddie sits on the Tarmac anticipating at least an extra thirty-minute wait, but much to his surprise, Harrington is on time with his team but bereft of groupies.

He steps out of the blacked-out windowed vehicle, again in the typical rockstar clothing you'd expect. Tight leather look pants, a sheer shirt and a knee-length jacket with faux fur trim topped off with swathes of accessories and a black set of wayfarers. Obviously, the specific items are slightly different, but Eddie wonders if it's almost like a uniform.  A dark alter-ego of the all-American blue-collar guy who just happened to be good at playing the guitar, he portrayed on stage, on album covers, and inside exclusive magazine articles. Despite the predictability of his outfit, his behaviour is surprising. He opens the door, and someone from another car rushes over to him, then to the photographers and then back to Harrington, who nods, and the rapid shutter sounds ride the breeze around them. 

Harrington shields himself at first, almost like he's trying to make a secret escape to the plane. Then, once at the foot of the stairs, he turns back, gets back into the car, re-emerges with a big smile, slow walk, and waves for the photographers, even stopping to pause and pose for a few shots as they shout his name repeatedly. The man is methodical. It makes Eddie wonder if any of the harassed-looking pictures he'd seen of Harrington were real at all.

Eddie takes a few shots from this angle. It might be cool for a reader to have the photographers in the frame for a change and then quickly rushes back up the stairs to capture him getting on the plane.

Once in position, Eddie feels a little strange, a twinge of guilt. Shouldn't he let the guy get settled on the plane before taking his picture? But on the other hand, he did have Harrington's permission to snap whatever he wanted. A flicker of humanising Harrington almost has him stand up out of his crouched position, but people are already boarding around him by that time. Buckley gives him a nod as she starts going over her extra checks. Harrington spots him in the aisle, and a half-smile pinches at his cheek.

"Hi," he says almost too quietly to be heard over the plane's noise and everyone else bustling around.

Eddie raises his eyes from behind the viewfinder, mirrors his smile, "Morning, Mr. Harrington".

"How do you want me?" He asks, gesturing around.

"Uh, just pretend I'm not here," Eddie replies, not tearing his eyes from the camera this time.

"Sure, I'll try my best." Harrington oddly responds and smiles a little wider, and soon enough, everyone is moving around like Eddie isn't even there. He finds a space tucked in between two back-to-back club seats so people can truly go about their business, but not a few minutes in, Harrington disappears through a curtained-off area. Eddie can see everyone settling into their seats, so he finds the nearest empty one and sits down, too. 

He'd been on two private jets before one was owned collectively by a band, and the other was chartered by an artist when they first hit the big time. This was something else. Fully rotating and reclining plush seats, a meeting or dining table area, screens everywhere, and everything in whites and occasional thin stripes of pastel or chrome. For such clinical colours, it’s still quite soothing and fresh. 

Everyone falls into their small groups on the plane, security in one section, PR in another, and some hair and makeup on standby. 

Eddie quickly packs up his camera and tucks it away safely with the rest of his gear. This not being a commercial flight meant you didn’t have to wait for another hundred people to get going, and he’d been biding his time until one of the crew came past and reminded him kindly as they passed him an envelope.

Eddie rolls his eyes. It’s Harrington-branded stationery. Of course, it is. Apparently, a simple Post-it or lined paper would be too far beneath the guy. 

Marney’s voice rings in his head. “Don’t fuck this up for us, Ed. Just try and enjoy this for what it is. A holiday to Vegas where occasionally you have to take some pictures, work your editing magic and come home an almost millionaire!”

He takes a deep breath to reset, closes his eyes, counts to ten, and relaxes. He looks at the envelope again. He tries to imagine it's not pretentious, just a little cute thing.

It’s a pale blue-grey, excellent quality feel paper. The border is embossed silver with a little guitar motif in one corner and a Unidyne-style microphone in the other. His name was penned in black ink in the centre. He opens it up and takes out the card.

See you in the sky.

He huffs, puts it back in its envelope and tucks it away in his hip pocket. Eddie puts on his belt as instructed and uses take-off to channel his frustration.

Eddie is not a nervous flier, but he digs his fingers into the arms of the chair and shuts his eyes all the same. Not for nerves, though, just to power through. He thinks about the money and how this wasn’t so hard. In fact, it was easy. It benefited him way more than Harrington. He’d get some general insights and team them with some exclusive shots, and the fans would throw their money at his project, even if Harrington was only a tiny section of it. He’d witnessed how they operated with other such media. When he had a cameo on a TV show or was part of a charity campaign, it was consumed by them to the point of assimilation, and once they’d bled it dry of him, he’d be in something or appearing somewhere else. It was a very smooth operation of drip-feeding fans, and he’d been doing it for years. 

He could disappear creatively for a year or two at a time. Didn’t have to offer up a song or tour, just be in the vicinity of a camera. The next thing you know, he’s everywhere again, people playing his old songs, or he’d show up for an appeal and be involved in a comedy skit once a charity target was met or get invited to an awards show. Eddie’s fingers grip tighter into the armrests. He’s so annoyed he knows so much about him, how he’s been haunted by him for so long.

Eddie desperately tries to channel peaceloving-remember-your-processes-Eddie, but unfortunately, he’s been shoved into a closet and locked in by bitter-venomous-Eddie, who whispers conspiracy and gorges on Eddie’s hate and anger.

This guy was a piece of work. Who does this kind of shit? He’s already agreed to the in-flight interview. He doesn’t need to send a fucking reminder. 

He feels the bile rise in him again as he thinks about Harrington’s smug face as he signed the back of the note. He grips the arms of the seat harder as the plane is still in ascent. 

He forces his mind out of its cesspool of hate, which honestly had a greased-up water slide down into it when it came to people like Harrington. He thinks about times and people when he has purposefully had patience. He even thinks about how they left their last meeting. Harrington should have apologised, but Eddie knew guys like him didn’t hand those out. It was beneath them to fully admit fault. And yet he had tried to excuse his behaviour, and Eddie had forgiven him in the moment. That helps him relax a little. Then, the idea comes to him.

Harrington is just a screaming child at one of his family portrait shoots. They only wanna do what they wanna do but will give a little, providing the bait is sufficient. This much had been proven. Once Eddie accepted the job, Harrington said yes to whatever he’d asked for. Maybe he’ll behave himself if Eddie is sweeter, less businesslike. He didn’t seem to like that Wheeler guy and clearly enjoys being fawned over. Eddie isn’t sure he could go that far, but he could play a softer role. After all, the more Harrington let him in, the more exclusive content his book had. And the more exclusive content in that one section, the more money it would make for Eddie.

His shoulders finally fully relax, and a small smile graces his face as the thought of potentially being completely set for life floods his mind. No more scrimping and scraping by. No more dingy apartments. No more sad little lonely life. He was finally going to be happy, and all he had to do was get through two weeks of occasionally snapping pictures. The rest of the time, he could hang out in his room, say he was editing or something, but just watch movies and luxuriate in whatever fancy hotel Harrington was happy to stay in.

As Eddie levels out, so does the plane. He opens his eyes back into a new patient version of himself, and the seat belt light blinks off.

“Mr Harrington will see you now, Mr Munson,” is said to him gently by one of the prettiest members of cabin crew he’s ever seen. Then he realises he knows him. It’s the guy from the airport hotel. Of course, Eddie would choose to have a one-night stand with a man who just happened to be one of Harrington’s selected crew!

“Oh…uh…hi,” Eddie says awkwardly, and the guy smiles back at him a little bashfully, “I didn’t know you worked for Harrington.”

“Yeah, well, I didn't at the time,” he smiles. Eddie quickly praises the heavens for name tags. Jesse. He looks at the floor and pretends to neaten up some things next to Eddie’s seat, “Not that you asked about my job, or much else for that matter,” the guy lets out a giggle and then presses his lips together, “Come along now, let’s not keep Mr Harrington waiting,” he beckons Eddie to follow him through to the next compartment of the plane. Eddie quickly gathers his equipment bags and follows him down the plane.

Eddie is close to sweating. This was awkward. He’d said he’d call the guy, but he didn’t. Just thought it would be what it was, and that’s it. But now… Jesus Christ… Now, he is wiggling down the aisle in front of him in a uniform that is so snug it leaves little to the imagination. Eddie thought the polo shirt hugging his chest was tempting enough, but this crisp white shirt was something else. He’s pretty confident he saw the outline of a nipple, but now all he can see is that sweet ass being hugged by the navy blue material of his suit trousers. He doesn’t remember much of this guy in the ways of conversation, but he does recall a few non-spoken things they both enjoyed. Eddie almost shudders pleasantly at the notion they might end up in the same hotel as one another and maybe… No! No way! You already mistreated him once , he reprimands himself. He’s not a plaything. He’s a person. So you either ask him out properly, or you forget this. And he is not about to date someone who works for Harrington.

Eddie can’t decide if the wave of horniness that just washed over him was better or worse than being angry. The answer to that comes very swiftly as they move through to where Harrington is.

Everything gets dimmer and darker, to such a degree that Eddie actually tears his eyes away from ogling the attendant in front of him.

The previous light interior is a world away from the private plane interior of Eddie’s teenage dreams that is laid out before him now. Everything is either black, charcoal, or dark wood trim. There is a small black loveseat sitting area to his left, deep like Chesterfields, and to his right, a big bar. Then, looking ahead, two big black executive club seats face one another against the window. He can see Harrington slumped in one, gazing out the window. But real distraction is behind him. A large bed already made up with velvet cushions, fur-looking throws, and the shimmer of silk or satin sheets underneath, all in black.

Eddie is way past teenage awkwardness, but this mixture of happenings might prove to be a little much for him as his eyes trail back over the attendant, who suddenly stops and turns around to give him an easy smile.

“You’re so lucky, Eddie,” Jesse whispers. Oh, Jesus Christ, he remembers his name. Eddie’s innards drop to a new level of cringing, “Not many people get to spend the whole flight with him, and never a man. He must be so excited to work with you. To sit and talk the whole flight?” 

Jesse brushes down Eddie's clothes to neaten them up, like one of the proud parents at his photoshoots, before they send in the kids for their portrait. “The girls say he usually doesn’t spend much of his flights talking to anyone, normally preoccupied with some groupie, you know?” 

Eddie’s eyes dart to the bed in the corner and then settle back on Jesse’s lips as he talks. He is trying to listen, but it is so difficult to concentrate, not when he’s talking about this, not when it’s this guy in his scandalously tight, unblemished uniform that Eddie can’t seem to stop thinking about ruining. “It’s hardly ever been a guy, let alone a gay guy. So I guess what I’m saying, Eddie is,” he gets a light poke in the chest, and he manages to lift his eyes to Jesse’s, “Don’t fuck this up for us, ok. He’s a very loud ally, considering his mostly conservative fan base. He’s helping,” Jesse’s eyes search his, and Eddie is starting to feel like maybe he doesn’t need to speak to Harrington at all. Perhaps he could get stuck in a bathroom, and Jesse would have to help him out or something. Jesus Christ, Eddie, keep it together. It’s just a cute guy.

“I’ll see you out there,” Jesse winks and moves to the side to barely let Eddie squeeze past, which he doesn’t mind in any way at all when Jesse’s hands guide his hips through the space, one of those said hands then give him a pat on the butt as he makes it past. Eddie sure hopes there is some kind of arctic-level AC he can blast himself with to cool down. Otherwise, a layer will have to go because it is so hot right now.

Eddie dons his family portrait pleasant persona. He puts his friendliest smile on and strolls over to what must be his seat with a cheerful pep in his step.

“Mr Harrington?” Eddie calls out and gives a neighbourly wave.

“Less of the Mr, thanks. Makes me feel all business-y” Harrington smirks and beckons him over with two fingers. He doesn’t get out of his seat or even sit up straight. There is a slight wiggle of adjustment, but that is all.

Eddie sits down in his seat, smile still perfectly in place, for no one to see because Harrington hasn’t even looked at him yet. He’s staring out the window. A little weirded out, Eddie resolves to unpack his camera, dictaphone, notepad and pen onto the small table.

He glances over at Harrington again, who appears quite frankly bored as he looks out of the window, “So am I ok to start recording and set up the camera to frame you so that we can talk and I can randomly snap whenever?” Eddie asks, and that finally gets his attention.

“Sure, sounds good,” Harrington answers unbothered, looking out the window as Eddie sets up the equipment. During setup, his eyes met Jesse’s a few times, and he sent a wink or a quick pout in return, honestly turning him into a giggling middle schooler. Eddie doesn’t remember him being this obviously flirty last time. Maybe for the average person, this might be a bit too obvious or too much, but after all this time, Eddie needed that.

“What do you make of all this so far?” Harrington’s drowsy vocal fry reminds him why he’s here, and he feels almost like he’s caught with his pants down.

“Uh, it’s nice. I mean, it’s great, honestly,” he answers, still making some final adjustments to the tripod with his back to Harrington. However, his eyes still occasionally trail over parts of Jesse he could catch a glimpse of, “Yeah, very nice indeed,” he says absentmindedly.

Eddie rounds the tripod, fixes the camera in place, adjusts for the lighting and takes a test shot, but when he looks at the screen again, Harrington is gone.

“Let me see that one,” Harrington demands and Eddie snaps his head around to find himself at eye level with Harrington’s double-buckled belt. He casts his eyes up and backs up, pressing the button to show the last picture, and Harrington leans down to take a look.

Backed against the side of his seat, Harrington leaning into his space, teamed with the surprise of having a very sexy flight attendant nearby, Eddie's heart pounds fiercely in his chest. He wants to take a much deeper breath, but Harrington is so close he’d hear if he hadn’t already.

Harrington hums happily, “Fuck, you are good at what you do, aren’t you?” He chuckles as he straightens up and backs out of Eddie’s space.

Eddie tries to pull his professional self back to the controls, “You’d hope so, wouldn’t you?” He says with what he hopes is a charming laugh.

Harrington, already relaxed in his seat, smiles up at Eddie for the first time, “I guess I already knew that, though, didn’t I?” He swirls the ice cube around in the tumbler, delicately hanging from where his fingers grip the rim of it. He taps one of his many rings against the glass a few times.

Eddie watches a curtain fly open behind Harrington’s seat. Jesse appears again, seems to take a deep breath, and composes himself neatening his clothes and hair before walking over to them, “Mr Harrington,” Jesse says like he’s absolutely delighted and hasn’t seen him in years, “How may I servi- uh, help?”

Eddie bites his lips together to stifle his laugh at Jesse’s probably Freudian slip. Even though it is absolutely killing him not to poke fun, but he’s not an asshole. He’ll tease him about it later, maybe over text or, better than that, in person.

He hears the leather of the chair as Harrington shifts against it, and that causes him to raise his head to find him holding Jesse’s name tag on his fingertips, “Well, Jesse. Some drinks would be fantastic if you wouldn’t mind.” Eddie watches Jesse’s eyelashes flutter at Harrington and amusedly realises he’s not the only person trying to keep it together on this plane.

“Yes, sir. Right away, what can I get you?” Jesse says eagerly.

“Hmmm. Why don’t you surprise us, huh? I’m sure your taste is excellent,” Harrington lazily smiles up at him, and Eddie doesn’t miss the flush at Jesse’s jaw’s hinge. He turns on his heel and heads toward the bar, leaving Eddie and Harrington alone again, “He’s new.” Harrington’s voice pulls Eddie out of his daze, staring at Jesse’s body as he goes.

“What?” Eddie accidentally blurts out.

Harrington laughs and points a finger over his shoulder without looking back, keeping his eyes on Eddie, “The Jock. He’s new, so bear with him. He’ll get a handle on things in no time at all, I’m sure.”

It’s confusing to Eddie why anyone inexperienced would be allowed anywhere near Harrington as he watches Jesse fumble with a few things at the bar, “This his first flight? Working on your jet, I mean.” Eddie asks.

Harrington takes the last sip from his current glass and puts it down, “Doubtful, I’ve had him up here a few times. Maybe it’s you making him nervous?”

“Wh-why would I make him nervous?” Eddie tries to ask like it's the weirdest thing in the world, and it only makes Harrington chuckle.

“Or maybe it's the other way around?” he hums, raising an eyebrow and looking out the window.

Eager to get off this topic of conversation, Eddie changes the subject, “Nah. So I thought, you’ve given me this whole flight, but I’d rather get the most out of it. I’ve been told most people don't get this opportunity, so I do not want to squander it. So if I just reel off some topics I’d like to ask questions about, and if any are a no-go-”

“Eddie,” Steve rasps his name and turns to look him in the eyes, “You can ask me anything you want. I have nothing to hide,” he says, and Eddie probably thinks that's true. He’s probably answered every question someone could think of by now. 

“Alright,” Eddie flicks through his notebook and glances back up at Harrington again, and he thinks maybe he looks better, not as exhausted, eyes not like saucers. He kind of looks like he might be human today. His eyes flick back to his notebook. He decides to start with the required questions for his book and then see where they go. As long as he has this answer, he has the quote for the page, “So how about how you got into music?”

Harrington doesn’t reply just looks at Eddie and then at the table between them. Eddie figures he hasn’t heard him and leans forward to repeat the question louder over the plane noise.

Harrington smiles and leans forward, too, which almost sends Eddie reeling back in his seat. Instead, he stays still, feels the heat of Harrington entering his space, and regrettably gets a waft of some fantastic cologne he’s wearing. Something leathery, smoky and warm, such a heady concoction that Eddie almost closes his eyes to enjoy it fully. But Harrington’s eyes urge his to follow them down to the table, where he reaches out and taps the dictaphone to record.

Eddie laughs nervously, “Oh, yeah. Thanks.” That nervousness from their first meeting rises in him again. He can’t mess this up. He doesn't want to impress Harrington per se, of course not, but he wouldn’t mind a stamp of approval to show all the other people who worship the ground he walks on so he can get more business and his life back.

“You mean this career or music in general?” Steve asks, tilting his head slightly as he slumps back in his seat, hand dangling between his spread legs. Eddie presses the button on the remote for the camera. The shutter sound goes off, but Harrington doesn't flinch.

“Let's start with this career and circle back, maybe?” Eddie says, tapping his pen on his pad, “I know you were successful in modelling and then made a move to music, but from your perspective, how did that come about?”

“You’ve done your homework on me, I see,” Steve smirks and Eddie kinda hates it. Still, something about doing this for his own project, his book, doesn't make him hate it quite as much, “Well, I was walking a red carpet for some awards event that I had nothing to do with, some film thing, don't remember,” he says blasé, “And someone was asking everyone what their secret talent was. I said I didn’t have one, that none of my talents were a secret,” he laughs at his own joke, “but the interviewer was pretty hot, and she pressed me a little, and I mentioned I played guitar.” He looks wistfully out the window, “She did a lot more than press me later.”

Eddie can’t imagine what it's like to be this guy. Does he just sleep with every woman he takes a shine to? Or is it all of the women he meets? He wonders how many have turned him down. 

Eddie's gaze flicks to Jesse, who is finalising the drinks by garnishing him, and he’s thinking about if he’d get to engage in a press of his own later.

“Thirsty, Eddie?” Harrington asks with a straight face, “You’re welcome to anything you want, you know. Anything you can see, just help yourself, or ask our buddy, Jesse James, to get it for you. I’m sure he’d happily be of… service,” on that last word, Eddie sees something interesting, a smile of mischief maybe spreads across Harrington’s face. It’s then he realises Harrington hadn’t missed Jesse’s faux pax earlier at all and had been polite enough to overlook it. Eddie’s face breaks into a grin and a small laugh. He doesn’t want to laugh with Harrington, but he’s been keeping his amusement about it under wraps for so long now he can’t help himself.

“Here you go, gentlemen. Two old fashioneds,” Jesse says proudly and gently sets down the drinks. Eddie does not miss Jesse's sultry look when he bends down to place his tumbler beside him. Oh, he was going to find him later, that's for sure. He picked these drinks on purpose. Eddie looks down at his drink and notices the distinct lack of cherries and just the orange peel set in there. Jesse remembered.

As Jesse goes to leave, Harrington reaches out and taps him on the arm, “Is Mr Munson not permitted a little fruit with his drink, like I am?” He smiles up at Jesse, and Eddie watches Jesse full-on stall. Jesse loosens his collar a little with his finger, but his eyes stay locked with Harrington, and Eddie watches his lips press together as he swallows hard. Eddie feels his brow crease with annoyance as the realisation washes over him.

Jesse’s hot for Harrington! 

The pep talk from earlier had nothing to do with Eddie being a rep for the gay community and everything to do with Jesse wanting not to be associated with a terrible flight for Harrington.

It’s not jealousy, he feels. It's something else as he looks between himself and Harrington. It’s alarm. They were nothing alike. Sure, they both had tattoos and were a little on the thinner side, but that’s not enough for a type, is it? But that was about it…they dressed somewhat similarly, but Steve was all designer. Other than that, nothing…except that they both had brown eyes and long lashes and…

No. No way. He was nothing like Harrington! His internal argument rages on whilst his face wears a slight frown and a smile.

If anything, Jesse was a variation of a younger Harrington before the lifestyle got him. Eddie screws up his face at acknowledging that, then looks between them nervously.

No. He doesn’t even like Harrington. That was dumb. His brain is just getting scrambled because he’s thinking about Jesse from two weeks ago. That was all. 

“It’s actually fine. I don’t like the cherries anyway,” Eddie forces a smile over at them.

“Well,” Harrington looks surprised at Eddie, then beams at Jesse, “How about that? Must be your lucky day.”

Eddie watches Jesse steady himself on the side of Harrington’s seat, “It sure is!” Jesse replies with the biggest dopey grin on his face. Harrington looks happily back at him expectantly until the penny drops of Jesse, “Right, yeah. I’ll just be over there if you want me- need anything, I mean,” he quickly corrects himself and leaves them again. Eddie’s eyes wantonly trail after him as he does.

“I can put in a good word for you if you want?” Harrington’s voice disrupts Eddie’s thoughts.

“Ah, sorry, no. It’s-“ Eddie stumbles over his words in a fluster, “I think he’s more into you, from what I can see,” Eddie adds, eager to shift the spotlight back to Harrington.

“You think?” Harrington says, settling back in his seat, “Sweet.” He adds with a smile and turns back to the window.

“Wait, doesn’t that bother you?”

“Why would it bother me?”

“Uh, because you’re a straight guy, and he is clearly not. Most straight guys don’t like that.”

“Well, maybe I’m not like most straight guys, you know? Or maybe, as arrogant as it sounds, I’m just used to a whole spectrum of people having a thing for me?” Steve swirls his drink before sipping some, “It’s nice to be liked, you know?”

Hearing Harrington own his arrogance felt a little strange to Eddie. He’d half expected him to make some derogatory remark or for him to just brush it off. Ever curious, Eddie wonders if he could poke at that a little. Harrington did say he had nothing to hide and he could ask him anything.

“Do you often feel disliked?” Eddie asks very cautiously.

“More often than you’d think,” Harrington answers somberly, eyes still observing the skies, “But that’s just the price of all this, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, can’t please everyone, I guess,” Eddie adds, still curious but daren't pry deeper as he wasn’t after a chat show sob piece here. His comment gets Harrington to turn toward him with a patented half smile.

“No. You can’t. Even though it’s magically expected of you,”

“What do you mean?”

“Once you hit this level of being in the public eye, being allowed to err, to be human is taken away. You made a wise choice at the beginning, keeping private and off-socials, that I couldn’t,” 

If not for his curiosity at this seemingly more vulnerable side of Harrington, he might be tempted to snap the air at him. Tell him exactly why he is off socials, and it has nothing to do with being wise and everything to do with his insane horde of fans. 

Eddie can’t resist what a tasty morsel this might be for his book, Harrington and the Price of Fame. However, it feels sneaky, so he gestures to the dictaphone, “We’re still recording, you know,”

“I know,” Harrington says as his eyes cast to the floor and then back up to meet Eddie’s eyes, “Is this not the kind of thing you wanted for your book? Insight, exclusives, a tortured artist?” Harrington asks, looking away again, and Eddie feels a glimmer of pity for him. This must be his day-to-day, figuring out what people want from him and providing it so he can continue living this lifestyle. Eddie offers him another pass.

“Well, that's not the purpose of my book, and it is thoughtful of you to offer that up, but I’d rather it was just your truth, no agenda on my part. I mean, apart from one question, I need to know the answer to.”

Harrington looks him up and down, takes a deep breath, leans forward in his seat, drink in hand, elbows on his knees, “What question is that then?” he asks gently, which strikes Eddie as unusual.

“What does music mean to you?” Eddie answers pleasantly but watches Steve’s soft expression fall to something pained momentarily before his smile returns.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Songs that inspired this chapter:

Stripped - Depeche Mode Come as you are - Nirvana

[cherriko-art]

I just want to thank the Tumblr community from the bottom of my heart for helping me find joy in drawing again. For helping me find art a little less scary with every comment I get. And to remind people, once again, how much of an impact positive engagement has for creators, no matter how small or big.

Long, midnight ramble on my struggles with art below.

Late night thoughts, but lately my motivation for drawing has been rekindled as a way to release the brain rot on the fandoms and games I've loved recently. I lost my love for art for a really, really long time and for someone who's been drawing since I could pick up a pencil, and has identified as an artist my entire life, literally witnessing myself lose my love for art and drawing has been a really painful process. Especially since it happened over a relatively short period of time. Over 20 years of loving and creating art, only to be extinguished in just a small period of 2 years. When I came to a sudden realization that I hated drawing, I mourned over it for a really long time. I missed the joy I got from drawing, the pride in my art, the passion to learn and hone my skills. I used to think I could never imagine a future where I wasn't constantly thinking about the next thing I wanted to draw, but now I am living that future. Art is never on my mind anymore. I try to draw and I become filled with anxiety and dread. There's not a single thought about picking up my pencil and creating. The only things I had drawn in the last 4 years were for zines and it felt like work, not joy. Drawing felt like a job, and it stopped being the center of my universe. I stopped being active on social media, bc I was only on here for art. But even looking at other people's art left a bitter taste, and I didn't want to look at any of it anymore. Several times over the last few years I've tried to rekindle my love for art, tried starting small again. But it always fizzled out quickly, and I'd abandon it again. Sometimes I scroll through my Instagram and it hurts to look at, because I distinctly remember how much joy I got from drawing every single piece, what my thought process was, and how excited I felt in creating. It's been so long since I've felt happiness in drawing.

Lately, I've drawn some things bc my emotions for the brain rots in my head were Too Big and I couldn't think of releasing these big emotions in anything other than what I know. In art. I just drew something, didn't think too hard abt it, and posted them. Like barfing your overwhelming feelings on paper then throwing it away. But the engagement I've gotten on these emotional-dump drawings have been so wonderful, no matter how small or big, and it's made me so happy. Very specifically from Tumblr. Tumblr has reminded me what it's like to actually interact with fandoms again. Instagram/Twitter/etc has become such a competitive platform for content creators, that any sense of (the minimal) community and fandom interactions have been completely wiped out. But Tumblr has stayed true to it's roots through all these years and never have I been more grateful.

For the first time in years, I'm excited to draw again. I actually want to draw. I finished multiple drawings in the last 2 weeks, more than I have in years. Instead of feeling numb and exhausted after drawing like I had been, I'm actually filled with adrenaline and excitement to draw more. I'm excited to participate in fandoms again, engage in communities. This is all because other people's positive engagements on my little drawings have motivated me to draw more.

Drawing has become a very daunting, anxiety-filled, unpleasant experience for me. I lost my love for art years ago. But the positive engagement in my recent art has pushed away some of that anxiety, and it's becoming increasingly easier for me to pick up that pencil again. Drawing is starting to feel fun again. I don't know how long this will last, if it will fizzle out like it has time and time again. I don't know if art will turn back into the Big, Bad Monster again. But for now, I'm just relishing in the feeling of art feeling like freedom again. And I have the Tumblr community to thank for that.

So for everyone on here, thank you.

[simply-not-an-egg]

On a thought dump tonight apparently but holy mother of god is it so nice dumping toxic relationships with people??

I’m not going to get into too much detail at the minute, but I suffered from a lot of ongoing childhood trauma from one of my parents (HINT: not my mother, she’s an angel), and I finally had the courage (more-so reached a breaking point) to say my goodbyes to this parent the other day.

There used to be a dark cloud over my head but as soon as I did that there was no more. And I actually feel properly free now. Like it is amazing. And the future excites me so much more?? Not to mention I’ve noticed my mental healing having become SO MUCH BETTER in just this last week alone.

Like I have attachment issues stemming from this parent since I was about 2 years of age, and unfortunately once I entered my current relationship they decided to come to the forefront on my mind. These last nine months with said partner have had a lot of tears and anxiety on my part because every little thing they did set my trauma responses off (and for the weirdest things mind you; he put a pillow over his face while we were dicking around one night and I had a panic attack because my trauma thought that was abandonment). But there have been far less worries and tears these last couple weeks leading up to this break-up with my parent, and I’m finding it SO MUCH EASIER to control my responses and actually think more logically now!! It’s incredible!!!

But yeah, TLDR, break up with any toxic bastards in your life. Whether that be parents, partners, siblings, or friends. It will do very good for your mental health.

And as a side, for anyone currently in a relationship like that, I promise you things will get better. It may take some time - I of all people should know that as it’s taken me half a decade to completely rid myself of this relationship - but you will succeed in the end.

And if you need someone to talk to, I’ll be happy to listen. I know how hard it can be, and I am here for you.

I’ll aim to make a post sometime after this about the ins and outs of gaslighting, narcissism, and how to manage a relationship with those aspects. And of course, ways to heal! As that is all very important!!

Anyway, I think that’s all the thought-dumping I have for tonight.

[piningprecussionist]

*another letter!* It's me, again, I... well... not trying to be creepy, or whatever. but I had a dream about you last night, and it felt so real and it kind of shook me. ever since then it's been like I'm suddenly hyper aware of just how lonely I am . and it's kind of getting me down. for as far back as I can remember, the only thing I've ever wanted is a sincere, genuine romantic relationship, and, even though I'm fairly young, around your age. the fact that I haven't been able to even get my foot in the door on that sort of thing really bothers me. figured I'd talk, or... I guess... write? to you about it, I don't know if it's particularly impolite to dump your personal issues via pseudo-anonymous letters. so I'll keep this my rambling to a minimum. thanks for putting up with me, by the way. you're genuinely sweet. safe travels -Crush Guy

((ooc: man. sorry to answer this in a nebulous future state again. coordinating things, am I right? /j. I would have had to do so regardless though, given what I have in store for Kim here... no spoilers! :) But we'll see what happens.))

Kim flops back down on her bed, letting out a long, low groan. That trip had exhausted her, thoroughly; she wasn't sure she wanted to think about or do anything for the next forever, at least, but... She cracks open an eye and looks over at her pillows, noticing another letter waiting for her. Sitting up with a sigh, she rubs her eyes before taking it up and opening it, trying to will herself to feel more alive.

Reading over the letter, Kim frowns, feeling something like a pull in her chest. She rubs at her sternum and brings her knees up to wrap arms around her legs, looking back over it a couple times thoughtfully.

I can certainly understand that... she thought to herself, resting a cheek to one knee. I want for a lot of things, I guess. And do without them. But I can definitely understand that kind of longing.

She eventually uncurls and shifts about, moving to lean back against her propped up pillows, now placed to cover the gaps in her bed frame. Despite herself, she finds her thoughts taking her back- as they often do- to high school. She feels the painful twinge again, and she's thankful not to have to hide her emotions in the safety of her room- she'd locked the door, after all.

She could still remember what it had felt like, back then; to be loved. Or to think that you were. She'd still been herself- Kim Pine: bitchy, aloof, and sarcastic, with a corrosive tongue that loved to lash out- but with Scott she'd felt so warm, and she knew deep down that she'd let herself thaw a little, in that time. She'd been less cold in ways Lauren had called her on immediately, much to her displeasure, but she hadn't been able to deny it, then. She still couldn't now, really; she was just better at masking it. She liked to think she was, at least.

She missed feelings like that- the warmth; the carefree nature in which they'd spend their time together. The way he would look at her stunned and flush after she'd tease him over some stupid comment he'd made, or how he'd turn away whenever Kim would catch him staring at her during class...

She hates the way it still feels warm now, thinking back. Warmth paired with the uncomfortable hole in her chest- a paradoxically heavy weight to an emptiness, expanding outward, trying to numb itself and failing miserably- only spreading the fire. Though there are none, Kim finds herself rubbing at her eyes, concerned that she might find tears there.

You need to stop doing this, she thinks to herself, as ineffectively as always. The thought has no weight if she doesn't put effort into making it actionable; she knows, because she's thought it so many times before. It was high school, Kim. It clearly meant nothing to him. Let it be nothing for you, too. Please? It'd be easier.

She spends a couple minutes trying to pull herself together, picking at loose threads along the edge of her skirt. The feeling continues to linger, however, so she simply sucks it up and starts in on her reply.

Don't worry about it, guy; dreams take us a lot of places we don't intend. It's not really creepy- honestly maybe expected, with us talking like this. Hope it was a pleasant one. And it's alright, I think. I get where you're coming from, too. I mean, I've dated around, but it's hard to find genuine connection with people. The kind I crave, at least. You'll need to kill me before I admit anything beyond that, though, heh. No problem, and also thanks, I suppose. Though I have my doubts on how true of a statement that is.

She's not entirely certain if she's satisfied with her answer by the time she's done, but she shrugs and sends it anyway, too tired to give it much more thought. Maybe a nap will fix me... she wonders to herself, eventually moving to lay curled up on her side facing the wall.

She would try for a while, but sleep would elude her; instead, a reel of memories plays back in her mind, haunting her with a distant, hopeful version of herself. How naive...

[colecassiidy]

Laws

I. please dni if you, the mun, are younger than 21+ years old. by interacting with me on this blog, you are telling me that you are a legal adult and therefore i will be treating you as such.

II. This blog runs off a ghost queue of ~1/day. My RP Prompts/Memes are always open! and I have a wishlist here!

III.  i will write with duplicates, ocs, and x-overs! i treat every plot and muse as their own separate verses, unless discussed otherwise (that is to say, i do not have over-arching plot/narrative on this blog and i do not practice mains and affiliations). because of this, i would very much prefer plotting over memes. even with canon ovw characters, lore is very vague and wishy-washy and there’s much room for interpretation and differences. come to me info-dumping me about your character and i will try and find a way where i can fit :p If I have followed your blog and have not yet reached out to plot, i either immensely enjoy your writing or i have yet to formulate a proper way to reach out; the latter of which can take a bit of time, so i will appreciate any and all patience :pray:

III - A. if there is no biography on your blog in regards to your muse, i may not follow back.

III - B. While I am duplicate friendly, I would politely request that if you ship your muse with a duplicate cowboy that we do some plotting before hand. My personal joy is finding threads/directions that have not yet been taken and exploring them to diversify the experience, which includes exploring other verses if need be.

IV.  this blog will contain graphic depictions of violence, drinking, and smoking – due to my realizing it too late, there are threads and images that are not tagged for blood. if these are things that discomfort you, i would highly recommend not following this blog :(

V. you can call me tek, i am 25+, i am here to be a complete and utter clown. i’m sorely lacking in graphics and icons but please do not let this stop you if this is something you utilize!  i also use the beta editor and, due to simple preference, will be avoiding writing with blogs that use the legacy formatting in long term threading. i write a lot on the phone and the legacy format is incredibly unfriendly towards post snipping; in the best interest of creating an ease for myself, i am going to begin enforcing this rule. 

VI. i do not intend on writing smut. please respect this, thank you! as somebody who has always had aroace tastes in fiction, i am more obsessed with friendships and complicated relationships as opposed to exclusively romantic/sexual ones; i find it incredibly difficult to insta-ship and trying to develop dynamics that are based off of flirting alone (platonic flirting is easier for me to do and something i will write him doing; if your character is not sexually attracted to him and if i do write a line towards your muse in this nature, please do not feel as if i am forcing a ship on you; i am very content and happy with my platonic relationships!). i do think cole has a healthy libido and can be quite a bit of a charmer when he wants, but it’s really just a writer problem on my end. 

VII. depending on the timeline, my writing will address cole as jesse mccree or cole cassidy following the name that he was using at the time. for simplicity’s sake, he will simply go as cole cassidy for any interactions outside of overwatch. because of the sensitivity of this topic, i will generally not follow overwatch blogs first. i’m adaptable upon request otherwise. if you have explicitly stated that you do not want to follow or write with blogs using that name (and all the power to you, there is no bad blood), i will hardblock in order to avoid future confusion and stepping any toes.

VIII. i’ve been a para roleplayer - (with a past avg of ~200 words - key words being past tense lol - i genuinely don’t think i can consistently do 200 these days); i would rather avoid novella, semi-lit, and literate threads as my energy levels are just absolute dog. my lengths can greatly vary to what the thread calls for, and thus i’ll be just as flexible with you. just, y'know, as long as we aren’t sending one-liners to para’s. chat rps + crack are always fun, and i’ll gladly participate!

IX. i respond to whatever i see that has been responded to (this includes ask answers - my default is to usually make threads out of them since i grew up with those acting as starters back in the day lkjsldfa; feel free to inform me if that is something you would prefer me not to do if it is not spoken in in your rules!) if you would like to drop a thread by simply not answering to it, i have no issue of this!

X. i’m slow, i’m so so slow, and i’m sorry - i have 2 jobs :’) my dashboard can also be quite quick at times and i will miss a good number of my mutuals that are located in different time zones and won't see posts until weeks later by chance of them coming up in my for-you.

XI. i want to make a disclaimer that i do block liberally. i've had to block blogs due to my for-you being flooded with blogs i'm not mutuals with and that it'll be so consistent they are all i see until i press the block button aslkdjfsl. It is not personal,

[natashalie-lumley]

Ok. This is something that maybe doesn't apply to everybody but I don't care because literally Nothing applies to Everybody. And I need to write some of this down before going to bed and having to get up for work again tomorrow

Some context: I answer phones for the Medicare department of a national health insurance agency. That means I'm mostly dealing with older people or younger people with disabilities. It also means a lot of calls about heavy topics. Which is a great lead in to my first point.

1) your member services rep is NOT your trauma dumping ground. I don't want or need to know about your shitty life, past present or future. I get so many people every day telling me they don't have any family or friends and they don't like their lives and honey I'm sorry because that does suck but I AM NOT A COUNSELOR. I'm here to answer your health insurance questions and get you off the phone.

2) similar point, WE ARE NOT MEDICALLY TRAINED PROFESSIONALS!! the number of times I've been asked "what medication should I be on" or "should I have this procedure" is higher than you think. And yes there are some people who are asking "what medications are covered" (which is a little easier to answer) and "is this procedure covered", but that's not what they Ask. Also leads in to point 3

3) we don't need to know your symptoms! We can't do anything with that information! Even if you're calling because something got denied and you want to appeal it, telling us about how you need the chemo because you're losing bodily functions or something is Not Helpful and in fact is very stressful. And no, me adding that to the appeal does not increase the chances of it getting a positive result.

4) don't ask super broad questions. A common one is "am I on the best plan" and they always seem confused when I can't just say "yes/no" to it. Each plan is just slightly different from the other, be it in the amount of dental work it covers or the medications it includes. I need to know what factors matter to you before I can tell you whether there's a plan that would work better.

5) if we say something is a Medicare rule, it means WE CANT CHANGE IT. the biggest one is the Coverage Gap, sometimes called the donut hole. (Tl;Dr is that after so much money gets spent on your meds you end up paying 25% of the cost instead of flat co-pays, which on like a handful of meds actually does save people money but usually it raises the price into the triple digits for a month supply.) Look, we know it sucks. We know that the whole system of stages is fucked. And we would LOVE to find a way for you to get your meds for free or super cheap. But as I mentioned before, we are not social workers and our resources for that are basically Google. So if we say "ok looks like the issue is [Medicare policy x]", telling us how much you need x is not going to change the fact that Medicare gets to do what they want.

6) HIPAA is a big ass deal and unfortunately it can mean making things difficult. Oh, your grandma has dementia and can't talk on the phone? Well unless you're authorized on her account or filed as her POA then grandma has to verbally come on the recorded line and say I can talk to you. Thankfully we're told that the caller can coach the member but like. It's still difficult and sometimes they're not in the same place let alone same state, and we have to say "ok so I can share certain information with you but I can't answer all your questions". If that happens, getting pissy at the rep isn't going to change THE LAW.

7) I'm sorry if you've been transferred a million times but if I can't help you because you need the dental dept, asking me questions is just prolonging both of our suffering. And yelling at me for it does nothing.

8) I don't know why other people do things. One of my absolute least favorite questions is "why did the last person I talked to tell me x and you're saying y??". Dude I don't fucking know I barely know why I DO THINGS and you want me to explain somebody else? (Also half the time the answer is "they didn't want to deal with you getting mad so they said what you wanted to hear" but I can't say that on the recording but it's true.)

9) technology sucks. I have 2 monitors and a laptop for work and I consistently want to introduce at least one of them to the business end of a mallet. Pages load slow or not at all and it's not on me so getting mad at me for taking some time helps exactly nobody.

10) those surveys at the end do have a result- bad reviews get coaching and good reviews go towards getting a raise. So even if you don't think it's worth it, if it's three questions or less maybe just take the dang thing.

11) if we're having trouble explaining something, it doesn't automatically mean we don't understand it. I get insulted at least once a day by someone intimating that if I were smarter there wouldn't be any issues and let me tell you, half the time is me remembering all of the non-advanced terms for things so I can try and break something down for you but the other half of those long pauses are me going "how to better explain the concept of co-pays when I can't break it down any further than "you have to pay for medical services".

12) if you say "well I'm going to change my plan" because we couldn't help you or something wasn't covered, please know that we are seconds from going "fine don't let the door hit your ass on the way out". We don't care, we can't care, because there are hundreds of you and it adds so much to the pile.

13) yes, a lot of us are working from home. Yes, a lot of the employees are from overseas. Yes, the costs of things suck. But if you try and engage us in any of those topics, the best you're getting is a non-committal response because and I can't stress this enough, we NEVER KNOW WHO IS LISTENING. So stop trying to get that agreement tell me what you wanted and go away.

14) if it sounds like a script it probably is. I get graded on my opening AND my closing and if I miss even a beat of it I get points off. So please. Don't hang up. Don't try and "uh-huh" every 2 seconds so we stop. Just listen and deal. Oh and please for the love of heaven, don't tell us "no I'm not taking the survey". What am I going to say to that, huh? Esp when, again, those do affect our jobs. Just say good day and hang up.

15) answer the question you were asked! This applies in both simple things (I end my greeting with "who do I get to help today" and the number of times people skip their name entirely or only give me their first name drives me up a wall) and in more complex questions. If I'm asking a clarifying question about a story you just told me, I don't need the whole story again! I just need that piece of information! You might think you're helping but really I'm sitting there glaring at the screen biting a hole through my lip in the effort to not punch you.

16) speaking of thinking you're helping, STOP INTERRUPTING. If you have something to clarify or think we missed something, keep your mouth shut and be respectful and wait until we stop talking. I hate being interrupted and so often it's something completely useless and I've actually started to very pointedly say "as I was saying" or just altogether interrupt back and say "please don't interrupt me" because "I'm sorry to interrupt but I could answer that question if you let me" was getting me nowhere.

There's probably more but I'm actually getting tired for once so I'm off to bed. The long and short of it- please remember that the person on the other end does not make the rules, does not make the decisions, and is doing their best. And also no their supervisor can't do those either because all of that is back of house and according to the internal phone book they don't exist. Sometimes you get a negative result on something and that's just life.

[themculibrary]

Daisy Johnson/Phil Coulson Masterlist

7 Kinds of Kissing (ao3) - Persiflage E, 10k

Summary: These are the many different ways that Daisy and Phil Coulson kiss.

a free choice (ao3) - zauberer_sirin T, 5k

Summary: It’s only a few moments afterwards that Coulson joins her next to the comm controls. Daisy is not surprised in the least and she doesn’t wish for him to change, exactly, but life would be easier if he did. Crappier, but easier.

“Full exposé on Quake,” Daisy quotes with a scoff, evading Coulson’s real question. “It barely featured any new information. Even the Watchdogs forums have better researchers.”

alien fruit (ao3) - zauberer_sirin M, 5k

Summary: Daisy and Coulson finally catch a break in space. Problem is, their hosts assume a lot of things about their relationship.

allied (ao3) - zauberer_sirin E, 6k

Summary: The political is personal.

Or: Five Times Daisy And Coulson Went Against The Sokovia Accords.

Daisy Johnson in Love (ao3) - Persiflage E, 3k

Summary: AU: Daisy unexpectedly finds herself falling for Phil Coulson following a misunderstanding.

disaster averted (ao3) - RowboatCop E, 7k

Summary: Daisy and Coulson are forced off the road and have to share a hotel bed. I wonder what will happen?????????

distractions (ao3) - zauberer_sirin T, 4k

Summary: Coulson's voice is distracting.

It's lucky Daisy is such a consummate professional.

Everyone Gets Attached to Something (ao3) - Persiflage M, 1k

Summary: Over the course of a day Daisy's relationship with Phil undergoes a change.

falling for daisy (ao3) - zauberer_sirin E, 7k

Summary: Phil Coulson falls for his boss.

(Post-season 3 unspecified future. Seasons 4-7 do not exist in this fic.)

Ghost Protocol (ao3) - sfiddy G, 3k

Summary: Some would say he was haunted by his past. Coulson knew that was bull. You don’t get to be haunted when you are the ghost.

Phil breaks and runs. Loads of soul searching and wandering commence until he has to call in. Of course, who is his retriever?

i am thinking it's a sign (that the freckles in our eyes are mirror images) (ao3) - zauberer_sirin T, 7k

Summary: Daisy ends up in a parallel universe, with bad news (Hydra won) and good news (Coulson is here).

Just my type (ao3) - BrilliantlyHorrid M, 10k

Summary: Boy meets girl. Boy gets dumped by girl. Boy meets different girl. Girl used to kill people for a living don't worry about it. Against every available survival instinct, boy doesn't seem too worried.

kind of romantic (ao3) - zauberer_sirin

Summary: This time, Daisy is sure. This time they're not getting out of here.

long way down (ao3) - RowboatCop E, 7k

Summary: She drops her forehead to rest on his scar for a brief moment because she can, because she thinks about it sometimes — what he went through to be here with her, the long path he’s taken (so much longer than hers) to get to where they are.

(Daisy & Coulson explore some new things and appreciate how far they've come together.)

not like a greek myth (ao3) - zauberer_sirin G, 6k

Summary: “We’ve got this,” he says first of all, when he senses Daisy knows the situation might call for her involvement. It’s not that he hopes to hide the gravity of it from her — perhaps he hoped Daisy would do the un-Daisy thing and not ask for details. Do the un-Daisy thing of giving herself a break.

On Fire (ao3) - RowboatCop E, 9k

Summary: Or, three times Skye and Coulson angst through some sex cliches, and one time they have fun with it

Road to Christmas (ao3) - RowboatCop T, 13k

Summary: Stranded in Austin, TX four days before his Christmas Eve wedding, Phil Coulson gets a ride with Daisy Johnson and her passenger, Ace Peterson.

shame is the shadow of love (ao3) - zauberer_sirin E, 3k

Summary: This is not what Coulson was expecting.

un lugar en el mundo (ao3) - zauberer_sirin M, 4k

Summary: Daisy falls in love with his voice first.

(Post-3x12 fluffy feelings)

wherever i'm with you (ao3) - RowboatCop E, 12k

Summary: Coulson and Daisy go undercover at a beach resort. Mostly awkward flirting, cuddling, and figuring out their relationship.