#either way. he hasn't ever moved. not in the original dream and not in any mental image of him

[schadenfreudich]

We finally gave the two... not quite people actual names, we could stop just describing them every time.

And while with Horst is was, yeah, that sounds like a fitting name, with Anton it was more of a "I think his name's Anton" which implies things that I will just not think about.

[fandoms--fluff]

Hello, sorry to bother you but do you think you could do one of yn mikelson is a little girl who follows Hailey everywhere since she feels very comfortable with her and when Jackson tries to get close to yn she growls and then bites

Alone

Baby Mikaelson sister reader x Hayley Marshall and Jackson Kenner

Warnings: none that I can think of

A/n: I've made this into a happy ending, I hope you like it! +sorry for not posting as much in the past few weeks or month, I've been busy with work.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You've clung to Hayley ever since you arrived in New Orleans with your big sister, Rebekah. You met her in the plantation house where she was in the sitting room, on one of the old but fancy armchairs.

Ever since, you've clung to her, feeling safe and calm around her. Don't get it wrong, you love your siblings, but a lot of the time they're either on 'vacations' (how your siblings explain whenever the daggers come into play), or they're so busy that they're barely around. But Hayley has been a constant, always in close proximity and loves to be around you. There are obviously times when she wasn't there, but you were alright because those times also meant that you were with one or more of your siblings. Usually Klaus or Elijah.

Though the werewolf, now turned hybrid, may loath the Mikaelsons most of the time, she hasn't ever thought of you in a negative way.

You're a thousand year plus year old original vampire in a four year old girl's body and mindset, just as you were when Esther turned you guys. It's been hard to get attached to things or people from moving around so much, running from your father and so. You haven't gotten any of the horrendous details of why about most things, but you've been content, knowing your siblings have always been there for you.

And now there's someone else, new, and she sweet, and caring. You got close to her fast. You were there with her throughout most of the day when your siblings weren't around. You found solace in being with her, whether that be cuddling and talking with her, or to the baby you soon learnt was in her tummy. Or playing games and walking outside in the garden.

And when the baby was born, Hope was now out of Hayley's tummy, as you put it to Klaus, which made him chuckle, it was even better. You now had someone to play with, well soon play with since she was still a small baby. But you could lay with her and read her stories from your fairytale books. And you could have warm cuddles with her and Hayley, that was your favorite nighttime activity. It was relaxing and kept any bad dreams away.

Everything was going smooth, for the most part, until he arrived in your guys' lives. Jackson Kenner. The alpha of the Crescent wolf pack from the bayou.

He just appeared one day, and you didn't take a liking to him. But it was fine, he wasn't around much, and you got to be with Hayley and Hope most of the time.

Until he started to appear more. And he would always only want to be with Hayley, Hope, and weirdly enough you, considering he obviously dislikes your siblings. Meaning he was trying to take Hayley away from you. And you didn't like that. But then what you hated even more was when he tried to ever get close to you. Though all your aggression towards him was brushed off by him and Hayley as you 'needing to warm up to him'.

At times like those, you chose to stick close with Hope. Which meant hiding away in the nursery, pulling up a chair, and climbing up on it to be able to see her. Sometimes you'd slowly and carefully climb into the crib, if you deemed it safe. Because you didn't want to end up hurting your new best friend.

But what's worse than him just being around Hayley is you've caught them kissing before. It was horrifying and gross and something you were furious about. So of course they didn't even know you were there in the first place and you didn't know what to do except for your veins and red ees to pop out. But you held yourself back. You didn't want to hurt Hayley, she's special and you love her.

It has been three weeks that you've seen the man here, and he's getting on your nerves. And for being such a small person, that frustration doesn't have a lot of space to go.

So, you've found yourself ranting to Hope, about your dislikes and hatred towards Jackson. Even though the baby has no idea what you were on about and can't talk herself, it makes you feel better.

But that's all crushed the second Hayley and Jackson walk into the nursery together. It's one of those days you decided to carefully climb into the crib and sit with Hope. With how the younger girl reacts, you know she likes it when you do as well.

You guys were having a good time, but now are interrupted. "Hey girls- how'd you get in there without help?" Hayley pauses, there;'s no one in the abattoir other than the four of you. Plus, the only times when you're in the crib with Hope, is when she lifts you up and down into it when you ask. But obviously she's been mistaken. Her eyes don't leave you two until she hears Jackson's voice.

Oh right, he's there too, you scoff, but it turns more into a little scuffle of a cough than anything. Damn your four year old self.

"I think she found a way herself" Jackson gestures his thumb over to the wooden chair you scooted over to the side of the crib. Hayley follows, and looks over to the set up, and sighs, a smile appearing on her face.

"You could've hurt yourself or Hope, Hun" She places her hands on the rails of the crib, leaning against it, and looks down at where you're holding a 16 month old Hope's hand. "No, I be safe. I make sure she not in the way before" You shake your head, explaining your thought process before you climb in.

"Okay, but promise me next time you get me, or Jackson, or another adult, to help you in. No more climbing. Okay?" She tells you. "Okay, I ask you or Lijah and Niky and Bex." You nod your head, not even mentioning Jackson.

Hayley sighs, shaking her head, a smile lighting up her face just a tad. "Yes, exactly" Hayley says, making Jackson smile as well.

"Okay Sweetie, it's time for Hope to take a nap. So why don't we get you out of that crib and we can have a bit of fun." Hayley leans against the railings of the crib, watching as Hope is already starting to doze off.

You nod your head in understanding and lean over to place a kiss on her head before raising your arms up to be picked up.

Jackson walks over and leans into the crib and picks you up from underneath your arms. And before he can place you on his hip, he almost drops you from the sharp pain emitting from his arm. He lets out a groan of pain, making Hayley immediately turn her attention to you guys.

She brings you into her arms once she sees the blood streaming down Jackson's arm. She lets out a gasp seeing the amount of blood staining his shirt and dribbles of his blood running down your chin.

She nods to her connecting room, and Jackson follows her and you snug in her arms into the bedroom.

"Are you okay?" Hayley asks him urgently after turning around from the door she closed. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Just stings a bit" Jackson hisses as he wraps his shirt he picked up from the dresser top around the bite marks.

"Okay, okay. Are you sure?" She asks worried. "Hayley, I promise you, I'm okay" Jackson smiles reassuringly.

"Alright," She nods, "Now on to other business, what were you thinking, missy?"

You glare up at her and then over to Jackson, your vampire face coming out, veins popping out underneath your red eyes. A growl makes it's way out of your throat.

"Hey, hey, no! Y/n, stop" Hayley looks back and forth from you to Jackson and then back to you again. "No!" you yell back at her. you then turn to face Jackson again, "Go 'way!" you yell at him. It's bad enough he's always here but if he tries to get close to you then make you good with him then he'll plan to leave and take Hayley and Hope with him. And they'll leave you behind. You don't want that, you don't want Hayley to leave and for Jackson to steal her from you.

Hayley and Jackson both paused, staring at you with their lips parted. It takes a long moment before Hayley finally snaps out of it. "Why would you say that, Sweetie? Jack is a part of this family now" Hayley says, rubbing her hand up and down your small arm.

You snapped your head up at her after what she just said. How could she?! He's not a part of this family, he's an intruder!

"NO!" You scream, tears forming in your eyes. There's so many emotions coursing through you that you don't know what to do with them all.

"No! No! No! No! No! No! No' family! No!" Big tears begin streaming down your cheeks, and past your jaw.

Hayley cupped the back of your head and pulled it against her chest then started rocking back and forth. "Hey, shhhh, it's okay, Sweetie, it's going to be okay. I've got you." Hayley speaks in a soothing voice over your sobs. She's over to Jackson with a helpless look on her face, not knowing where to go from here.

Jackson gives her a reassuring look and nod before making his way quietly over to the two of you.

You're still clung to Hayley, hands clutched to the collar of her soft shirt. You haven't noticed the man less than a foot away before his hand is on your back. The five away is his hands are significantly bigger than Hayley's, and you can feel Hayley's gentle and warm hands supporting the back of your head and your bottom to keep you up.

By now your sobs have died down from clinging against Hayley, but your breathing is beginning to become more erratic again. But before you could start to hyperventilate, Jackson starts to talk.

"Um, Y/n, I know you seem to not like me as much and I can understand why, I do. I'm a stranger who just came out of nowhere and began dating Hayley and get caught up with your family. But I was and am not a threat to you, I want you to know that you're just as safe with me as you are with Hayley. And despite that, I'll never come between you guys. I know you love her very much, Hun, and I know you probably feel threatened by me for taking her away, huh?" Jackson rubs his hand in circles as he calmly talks.

You pull away from Hayley and look up at the werewolf. Slowly, you begin to nod, agreeing. He's right, you do feel threatened that he'll take Hayley away from you.

"You take Hayley away. Leave me alone" your lip juts out and eyes dilate in sadness. Jackson sighs in sympathy, "I'd never take her away from you. I love her very much and think of you both as family."

Jackson lifts his hand up and softly ruffles your hair. "And Hope?" You ask. "Yes, and Hope" Jackson chuckles.

"Jack's right, Sweetie. You don't have to ever worry about us leaving you, alright" Hayley smiles to both you and him. "Okay," you smile. She places a kiss against the crown of your head.

Nothing could ruin this night.

[miseries-mistress]

PLEASE | CASSIAN ANDOR

Synopsis: You were beyond enraged, the feeling poisonously filling your chest, expanding and reaching into the far stretches of your mind until you're consumed by it. Cassian lied. It's not like he hasn't done it practically thousands of times but never to you, never to you. That was the promise he made, the only promise he made, and he just broke it. 

Warnings: brief mention of the reader being female, MAJOR EP 2 SPOILERS, angst, all angst, absolutely zero fluff, more angst, did i say angst? oh yeah, don't forget angst. W/C: 1410

Notes: in honor of the andor series, i wanted to write something about this fine ass man. keep in mind i am also very sick rn so don't expect too much. reposting this shit

star wars masterlist

"What's this?" You slam the holopad on the table, fuming while Cassian flinches. Physically flinches. You look almost delighted at the reaction you elicited from him.

"What is this?" you spit out, and his gaze darts around each corner of the room like he's afraid of an onlooker in your own home. He doesn't need to look at it to know precisely what you are talking about; a product of just receiving the information from his mother and Bee. Cassian knew very well that he messed up by exposing his true origin but never in his wildest dreams would he have imagined that you would find out about who he really was like this. 

"How did you find that?" He resists the urge to step back when your fury seems to double, but you don't lash out. Instead, you turn to a piercing rage, one that petrifies him and breaks him more proficiently than any white-hot rage ever could. What makes it worse is he was planning on telling you. His past was something he never wanted to hide from you, and while he had his reservations at first about letting you into his life, you seemed to worm your way into it and, in the process, his abandoned heart. As time passed, he got used to having someone else by his side, someone he could simultaneously love and trust unconditionally. It took a weight he didn't know he was carrying off his sagging shoulders, but there was one thing, one thing that hung over his head like a dark cloud, his past. 

He admired how you never pushed him to open up about it, willing to be there when he was ready to share despite the questions that would arise when you caught him talking to Bix either about dealings in the past that involved him with numerous things that linked to it or mentions of it. But today, his luck had run out, and he was here to face the callous, cruel fist of reality he tried so desperately to hide from.

"Bix told me," you seethe, gripping the pad a bit tighter. "She was surprised I didn't know."

Of all the ways you could have found out, that was for sure the least desirable. Hearing the news, as crucial as this is, from another person is one of the worst ways you could learn it because it suggests either a lack of trust or faith. Which is entirely false. Cassian trusted you implicitly with every fiber of his being, and it wasn't a lack of confidence that brought this on. It was his own complacent mindset that he assumed he would tell you when he deemed the time right, not when his life had been flipped upside down. As you turned your icy glare upon him, he felt a piece of his heart rupture. 

"She also mentioned," you grit your teeth together, your eyes failing to meet his, "that I'm the first woman you've never told about your past."

He sucked in a breath, silently cursing Bix. Fuck. 

"You're the first person I've ever been truly serious about–"

"Bullshit Cassian! Why didn't you tell me?!" you exclaim, but your words are deadly, and Cassian would have to be a fool not to realize that. This was dangerous territory he was trekking in. One wrong move, and– well, he would rather not think about it, for the pain of it would be too great to bear. 

"I was planning to tell you, if that matters."

"When were you going to tell me?! When you were on the run?! When it benefited you?!"

"That's not true," he reached out, attempting to place his hand on your shoulder, a calming gesture you were fond of, but you slapped his hand away. The cracks grew wider, slowly chipping away at his reality and his attachment to it.

"Damnit, Cassian, do you not trust me?!"

"I trust you with my life–" he's stumbling over his sentences now, his craft for talking his way out of situations failing him when he needed it the most.

"Obviously not," you scoff. You move to turn away, but an iron grasp pulls you forward and into Cassian's chest. You place your hand against it, desperately trying to ignore the feeling of stiff muscles beneath his clothing as you push away. Cassian doesn't relent, maintaining his steel hold while you fruitlessly struggle against him. 

"Let go of me," you warn, giving an experimental tug, but to no avail, as you don't budge.

"Let me explain."

"That's rich coming from you."

"Please." Your breath catches in your throat at the utter desperation in his voice while Cassian's mind runs a mile per minute. All he's consumed with is the thought of not losing you. He can't imagine living in a world where you resent him after he opened his heart to feel after years of repressing emotion after emotion. Instead, he feels the cracks in his heart widen, chunks breaking off and slowly breaking him as well. 

"I've wanted to tell you. I've wanted to tell you for a long time. I've just never found the right moment."

"Then why does Bix know, hmm?" Now that was a far trickier question to answer, one which opened doors to parts of his soul he's closed off to the outer world. The answer was far too complex for such a simple question. 

You mistake his silence as his answer and scoff, yanking your arm from his limp grasp, the faintest touches of his skin leaving a phantom imprint on your own. 

"You're unbelievable." Another crack, this time it splits, creating more crevices, more pieces he's afraid he will be left to pick up alone. 

"Don't go." He sounds pathetic. He knows it, and so do you. 

"Trust goes both ways, and you've just lost mine." 

Shatter. 

Cassian's heart fucking shatters into a thousand minuscule pieces. Why can't he stop you, the only real good in his miserable, horrible excuse of a life, from leaving? Why can't he explain?

Logically he knows both of your emotions are running high, and your responses are feeding into each other's emotions, making them spiral out of control. 

Trust goes both ways, and you've just lost mine. Your words rang loudly like an endless song of suffering orchestrated just for him. 

You storm to the front door, not to your room like you do whenever you get into an argument, but to the door. You yank your coat off the rack, shrugging it over your shoulders without sparing Cassian a glimpse. In the midst of the climax of your relationship, he can't help but long for your soft eyes, filled with unbridled love while holding their own untamed, wild passion that he often found within himself instead of the darkness and rage that clouded them over. He yearned for the warmth of your touch, your partially calloused hands running over his scared skin while bringing out a vulnerability he didn't know he possessed. He just wanted whatever you would give him, addicted to your smile, smell, and love so much, so it blinded him. 

Cassian knows this is his only chance to explain, to get down on his knees and beg for forgiveness, but he can't move, think, or feel anything. It's all the same void of nothingness penetrating his senses.

The door opens. 

Cassian feels like you're stepping on the shards of his heart, breaking them further to a point he feels is no return. 

"Please," a last desperate beg. All Cassian wants is to take you into his arms and wrap them around you, explaining everything before you become a whisp in the wind. 

Please.

The door shuts.

[mister-eames]

Hello Ash! So, we know that Dom got into dreamsharing because of professor Miles, but how do you think Arthur and Eames got into the industry? And why did they stay, what attracted them to it?

(this is especially true for Arthur, who seems to not have side gigs apart from it, from what we know at least)

And do you think they'll stay after inception?

Hello lovely!!! Oh I love this question and I'd love to know your thoughts/theories as well!!

For Arthur, I love the fandom fave military backstory, and having been a part of the original project. Or maybe Miles used to work in the US and it was Arthur that was one of his 'best and brightest' that Cobb corrupted. Mostly, I gravitate towards the idea that Arthur was never a student or in the military - that he worked himself up into a position as a research assistant through sheer hard work and happenstance, met Cobb through this position and got roped into dreamshare when Cobb went off the rails.

Arthur, to me, seems to be one of the most grounded in having a life outside of dreamshare/criminal activity. I think he was deeply attracted to the exploration of it - to the knowledge, the learning. A whole new world of ideas, notions and theory that he couldn't extract from any book. His thrill was the unspooling of it all. If Arthur wanted to know about dreamshare, its mechanics, its history, then he had to work for it, experience it. Dreamshare, to Arthur, was a challenge, it was the chance to dream up the life for himself that he always wanted - to make the money everyone said he never would.

But then, I think, once Arthur had learned and experienced as much as he could... it stopped being a challenge. It stopped being fun, something he enjoyed. It stopped being the thing that lit the fire under him. That, and what happened to Mal. Maybe he just wants to do something else, go back to a semblance of normality. I truly think he got a big dose of 'play stupid games, win stupid prizes' with Mals death, amongst other things to where it just wasn't worth it anymore. He stayed to get Cobb out of his mess, and didn't return to it, after Inception, except potentially for a handful of times when someone really needed him.

For Eames.... also love the military backstory. Solid. Works for me, love it. I'm also fond of the idea that he was just a young man down on his luck at one point, got into stealing, forging, cat burglary, whatever, and was tasked - either by fee or by blackmail - to steal a PASIV. Of course, seeing what a high price it fetched for, he kept it for himself. The rest is history.

I have a headcanon that Eames was actually retired from dreamshare at the time of Inception, and that he couldn't help but have one last chance at succeeding where he had failed before (and one last chance to dream with Arthur again). I don't know if he ever goes back after. Maybe on very rare occasions, to see if he's 'still got it'. My feeling is that his heart hasn't been in it for a long time, and that the detriments truly outweighed the benefits for him.

I like to think they were both on the path of different things in life besides dreamshare at the time of the movie. Neither of them seem particularly invested in the work itself for the reasons I mention before - especially Arthur, he didn't even want to take on the job, had no professional interest whatsoever. Eames barely kept a toe in the door prior to his recruiting. That, and I think they're at a transitional point in life - thirty-ish/thirty-something - where your priorities are just...changing. Your drives are different, your goals. You look back at your twenty-something version of yourself and say see, you survived, it's time to take a deep breath now. With all of the imagination, influence and investments they must have, I don't know if they would want to spend their time moving forward the same way they did the decade before when they were young and careless, after all they've been through.

[kylesvariouslistsandstuff]

The Pixar shift saga continued:

All over twitter and even BlueSky, I see it, and it's quite something. Hell, people I know who barely ever talk about animation, or film or pop culture for that matter, are talking about it... Animators, artists, filmmakers, critics... All calling it out.

Namely, Pixar CCO Pete Docter's words on having Pixar - at the behest of Disney executives - move away from telling "autobiographical" stories, making films that are personal to their respective filmmakers... Hollow, corporate words that I bet he was "supposed" to say.

The backlash is almost feverish. To the point where some are reading it as Pixar catering to white people only, given that two of those "autobiographical" films are... Let's see... TURNING RED, directed by Chinese-Canadian Domee Shi, and ELEMENTAL, directed by Korean-American Peter Sohn. SOUL as well, Docter's latest directorial endeavor, which was co-directed/written by Kemp Powers. Whether the intent is "no more autobiographical/personal stories" or "no more stories told from different cultural backgrounds", the pull quote is still NOT a good look. Hell, I'd say this looks worse than the time John Lasseter fired Brenda Chapman off of BRAVE.

And I wonder if this quote, otherwise tucked away on some cynical Bloomberg article whose writer feels that sequels will "restore Pixar's magic", getting all this scrutiny online possibly leads to... Pipe dream... A clarification at the very least? Some kind of backtracking?

Look I'm no dummy, corporations are gonna corporation. I'm pretty sure if Disney overlords are mandating it, it's gonna happen either way. Bob Iger's whole deal, after taking back the reigns from Bob Chapek (who he appointed in the first place), is this need to make the films "better". And that means interfering with the filmmakers instead of considering every other variable: High budgets, competition, a much different marketplace, how COVID wrecked everything and accelerating long-gestating problems in the industry, etc.

But the statements didn't go unnoticed, and there's some hot water brewing. Maybe an animation news site, particularly one that practically THRIVES off of this kind of drama, amplifies it. And maybe, just maybe... A little controversy erupts over it? Part of me feels that this won't go unnoticed, it already hasn't in some circles. Twitter and BlueSky and such are not real life, but I think the eruption over this quote speaks volumes. Pixar is often associated with original storytelling that's often from the filmmakers' passions and hearts, and to hear Docter essentially say "We're not going to do that anymore" has been a shock to many, myself included.

And again, if you've read my previous rants on this, I don't blame Docter. I think he's merely just saying what Iger's cronies want him to say. He said something similar a year ago after ELEMENTAL was released:

"I always felt that ELEMENTAL would speak to a lot of people, and I'm so happy it has... But we have also taken another look at the projects we're working on now. What are the kinds of films we want to be making? I really think I want to double down on what allowed us to speak to audiences to begin with."

This quote, from October of last year, went relatively unnoticed. This seems to put it into perspective better, even if it's a little more vague. This sounds more "let's play up certain commercial elements" and not "squash out the personal stuff".

I don't mind a compromise where an artistic vision shares the 90 minutes with what the bean counters call "general appeal" or whatever. Often times, that's just how the sausage is even made in animation-land, even if it makes for results we might not always like. That's literally the entirety of Disney Animation's output from the mid-'90s up until the mid-'00s. Films like HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME had things like the silly gargoyles and fart jokes, yet they were still allowed to have some really great stuff in them and really cool filmmaking that young animation fans marvel at today. It's even a thing in the praised '10s movies, too. And a lot of the non-Disneys, too. NIMONA, for example. Take away the punk edge and LGBTQIA+ perspective, and it's quite similar to a lot of Western animated movies, particularly the "mild-mannered character gets saddled with the funny and unpredictable sidekick" thing with Ballister and Nimona, and that end-of-2nd-act breakup.

Outside of the SPIDER-VERSE movies and maybe PUSS IN BOOTS 2, it's typically imperfect in the American feature animation circuit. There's almost always behind the scenes battles and compromising, and ultimately, I'm happy if we still get a film that looks like something the filmmakers had a great time making and were able to work around certain notes/mandates/etc.

This is merely speculation on my part, but what matters is that the quote that's under fire is recent. Like, days ago recent. And I wonder what'll happen from here... Things go as Iger wants them to go? Or some kind of attempt at correction?

[kitausuret]

well now I'm on a roll so I'm gonna keep going lol

re: my last post I guess

It is actually pretty fucked up how so many WOC in Spidey comics get just like! Fucked over! Especially when it comes to being love interests! Which isn't like an outlier because love interests are very common in Spider-Man comics -- it comes with the territory of "the best stories in Spidey could be a soap opera plot".

The most egregious example is obviously Sha Shan. Yes, she is a product of her time but let's be real, the White Savior stuff is just cringeworthingly bad. Do I get why she and Flash and their relationship are written the way they are? Do I recognize that in some ways Flash was just trying to repay her for her having saved his life in Vietnam? Yes to both, but there's really no excuse for the way their relationship just imploded in the 80s. Why couldn't they just have a normal breakup. Marvel, please. And of course she's been mostly shelved since then.

Next we have Glory Grant. Does she ever become Peter's love interest? No, but around the time of Inferno she does get into a pretty serious relationship with Eduardo Lobo. It's complicated (he's a mutant/werewolf, also organized crime shenanigans) but she loves him! And she's a huge romantic! She wants to be swept off her feet! Eduardo is dashing and adores her and guess what happens. She accidentally kills him while meaning to shoot Spider-Man.

And then there's her relationship with Randy -- I never understood why they got together tbh. To me it always felt like Mackie just stuck them together because he wanted to do something with Randy post-divorce without actually considering either of their personalities or compatibility. But at least she had a normal relationship I guess.

And after that, nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch. How do I know? Because I read every single one of her appearances.

MOVING ON.

We get to Miss Arrow, who was actually Ero, an aspect of The Other. (Don't worry about it.) Anyways, while she was not actually a Human Being, she did take on the appearance of a woman of color, so when it turns out she's been manipulating Flash the whole time she was pursuing him and she's going to forcibly impregnate him? (yeah, really, that was the plot.) Like, oh, okay. I guess here we are. But we can't get any worse, right?

WRONG.

Enter the impeccable and stunning and beautiful and gorgeous and perfect Lily Hollister. (I am very normal about her.) She's introduced as Harry Osborn's latest squeeze. While the narrative initially tries to paint Harry as some kind of playboy (lol. lmao, even) it's clear he's REALLY into her. Or at least he thinks he is. We can dissect the comphet another day. But, lo and behold, it turns out a good chunk of her motivation for sticking around was because she's secretly Malice! AKA a supervillain!

That's the worst it got though, right? WRONG.

Then there was the whole subplot where it's revealed Lily slept with Norman Osborn, she's pregnant with probably-Norman's-child, blah blah blah I don't wanna talk about American Son. There's a bit of a course correction in Origin of the Species but let's not pretend she didn't get royally fucked over by the narrative. And she STILL hasn't recovered. (The whitewashing is terrible in many comics.)

Since then I honestly can't think of any WOC love interests in Spidey that have had any kind of prominence. Even on the symbiote side, we have (checks notes) Manuela Calderon, who hasn't appeared since Conway's Carnage series, even though Vicki Montesi has been around. Flash's latest paramour is Aria, who I love, but she doesn't even have a last name! We don't know anything about her! Yes I want to write half a dozen fics about her anyways but LET'S GET SOME CHARACTERIZATION!!!!!!

So many of these wonderful gals we don't get to know things about them - what are their life goals; their hobbies; their dreams and desires.

Of these, Glory is the best developed, but she's also been around since the 70s. I would argue that the fact that she's not a love interest most of the time has meant she occasionally gets development. But we should be able to have both! Women like Betty, Liz, obviously Mary Jane and Felicia, all get a chance in the spotlight. No, it's not consistent, and yes their stories have issues as well, but at least they have stories. We get to see them in love and heartbreak, often in great detail!

The Spidey office can and should do better by its ladies of all colors -- and not just relegate them to "sacrifice" or "surprise supervillain"!

[tabloidtoc]

National Enquirer, March 15

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Tiger Woods' car crash

Page 2: Bruce Springsteen has beaten the DUI charges leveled against him after federal prosecutors couldn't find a drop of evidence he had been drinking over the legal limit -- with an acceptable blood alcohol level of 0.02 well below the 0.08 threshold at the time of his arrest in Sandy Hook, New Jersey, prosecutors backed off two of their charges for drunken and reckless driving -- the rocker did plead guilty to a third charge, admitting he had two small shots of tequila on federal parkland and for that, he was fines $500 plus $40 in court costs

Page 3: Patrick Dempsey's dreamy return to Grey's Anatomy was a big hit with fans but his well-received cameo left series star Ellen Pompeo seething with jealousy -- Ellen may have permitted Patrick to revisit his old stomping grounds in Meredith Grey's fever dreams in season 17 but she doesn't want him coming back permanently and swiping her hard-earned glory and she considers herself the anchor of the show and thought she was rid of this guy after making the show her own, but now fans are begging for him to be brought back and Ellen is furious -- it's no secret Ellen hated the first 10 years of the show when Patrick was the star and she feels the series got better after he left and she became a big-shot producer, something she'd been demanding for years -- she likes being in control and calling the shots and clearly thinks she got this deal on her merit alone but it's also because she's the star who's lasted the longest; most of the original cast had already left and bosses had to cave in to keep her -- unfortunately being in charge hasn't amounted to better ratings and show has been slipping consistently in recent years and the main reason they brought Patrick back on was to spike the ratings, which it did and now producers are considering offering Patrick a full-time gig but Ellen will do everything in her power to prevent Patrick from stealing her thunder again

Page 4: Home reno gurus Chip and Joanna Gaines are clashing over his wild spending, and she's desperate to rein him in before they land in the poorhouse -- Chip and Jo are rich on paper and worth $20 million in property and assets but they were hit hard by the pandemic like everyone else and recovery has been sluggish to say the least -- they're just getting back on their feet and under a ton of pressure to get their Magnolia network off to a running start but Chip, as usual, is casual when it comes to money and it frustrates Jo to see him buying things they don't need, like new tools and equipment when the old ones work just fine and overpaying on lumber and masonry -- Chip is always shopping and not always for the house; he's got a boot fetish and has dozens of pairs, plus he treats the crew to free cappuccino and treats from their coffeehouse several time a day and Chip wants the best of everything for himself and everyone else

* Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds are ready to welcome baby number four through adoption -- the couple who are parents of daughters James and Inez and Betty hope to find their next child in South America and they've invested time and money sponsoring immigrant children and they're warming up to the idea of providing an orphaned baby or toddler with a forever home -- a 16-year-old girl they sponsored through the Young Center for Immigrant Children's Rights was deported back to Honduras and they were heartbroken, and Blake and Ryan are now determined to provide a child with a happy home and opportunities he or she wouldn't have in their native country

Page 5: Newlyweds Pamela Anderson and Dan Hayhurst are itching to start a family and are already trying for a baby of their own -- 53-year-old Pam tied the knot with the 40-year-old handyman on Christmas Eve at her Vancouver Island home and she's been telling pals they hope to have happy news soon -- Pam wants to build a whole new clan with Dan and he's on board even though they each have kids with their exes and Dan's two kids from a previous relationship are living with the couple at Pam's pad -- the couple love the idea of adopting or going the surrogate route and it's not something they want to waste any time over

Page 6: Weary Kelly Clarkson is juggling her skyrocketing career and brutal divorce battle with estranged husband Brandon Blackstock on less than six hours sleep a night and Kelly has also been pushing to sell her homes in Nashville and Encino, while running her L.A.-based talk show and recording new music -- she's been running herself ragged for months and she's feeling the burn in a big way but despite her exhaustion, she can't sleep and nothing she tries works and the most shut-eye she catches is two, three hours at a time; she lays awake in bed at night worrying and crying

* Suddenly remorseful Kanye West has spiraled into depression and despair since soon-to-be ex-wife Kim Kardashian filed for divorce -- for all their problems, Kanye realizes she was the one person who was there for him whenever he went off the deep end and now he knows he's alone and seriously doubts he can hold his life together -- without Kim and her family to keep his wild impulses in check, he may succumb to the poor judgment and wild mood swings that have marked his chronic bipolar disorder as they were the ones who reminded him to take his meds and steer clear of recreational drugs and now all he has is a circle of yes-men he doesn't listen to anyway -- since the split, Kanye has shuttled between his ranch in Cody, Wyoming and a hotel in L.A. near the sprawling mansion he once shared with Kim and he's been blowing up her phone to beg forgiveness, but she won't take his calls and it's driving him off the deep end again

Page 7: Kourtney Kardashian is fed up with Shanna Moakler's online barbs and is plotting her revenge against the ex-wife of her new squeeze -- since Kourtney and Blink-182 drummer Travis Barker went public with their romance last month, former pageant queen Shanna has been throwing social media shade and Kourtney's tired of taking Shanna's crap and she's going to fire back soon and Kourtney's using her wide network of contacts in Hollywood to bad-mouth Shanna and she's placing calls to casting directors and perspective suitors to put as many potholes in her love rival's path as possible and she plans to make Shanna regret messing with her

Page 8: Nearly two years after Johnny Depp was forced to exit Disney's Pirates of the Caribbean franchise following ex-wife Amber Heard's allegations of abuse, the company has kicked him while he's down by considering her for a plum part -- Johnny is fuming over news that Amber is reportedly in contention to play fairy-tale heroine Rapunzel in the studio's upcoming live-action remake of Tangled -- for Amber to be in the running for a Disney pic is the ultimate insult to him especially because he believes the company made millions of dollars off his name

Page 9: Prince Harry and his wife Meghan Markle had a whopping $500 million motive to betray Queen Elizabeth -- outraged at being cut loose by the British royals, the couple retaliated by secretly negotiating backroom Hollywood megadeals and going public on TV -- Harry and Meghan see themselves as victims of an out-of-touch monarchy and want revenge and selling out Harry's family is the way to get it and cash in big-time; Meghan's convinced they'll have deals totaling $500 million by the end of the year but they better act fast because Hollywood is a fickle town where even royalty can be chewed up and spat out

Page 10: Hot Shots -- Amelia Hamlin stuck to the shore while pink-haired beau Scott Disick made waves in Miami, Steve Martin nibbled on a pretzel while filming Only Murders in the Building in NYC, Floyd Mayweather turned 44 and celebrated with a birthday bash in Miami, Bachelorette reject Tyler Cameron showed off his toned tummy in Florida

Page 11: Drew Barrymore feels deeply for dad-controlled Britney Spears because she's been there: she said her mom locked her away in a loony bin for over a year when she was just 13 -- Drew said it's hard to grow up in front of people and she empathizes with Britney and Paris Hilton and any star who can't escape the glare of celebrity -- Drew's mom put her in a place that was a full psychiatric ward and says she used to laugh at those Malibu 30-day places because she was in a place for a year and a half called Van Nuys Psychiatric and you couldn't mess around there and if you did, you would either get thrown in the padded room or put in stretcher restraints and tied up

* Eddie Murphy famously bragged he has never changed a diaper in his life despite having so many kids and now he's set on having another baby with fiancee Paige Butcher and this will make baby No. 11 for Eddie -- he says his genes are incredible as ever, so why stop; he's super fit and Paige is in amazing shape at age 41 and wants at least one more baby so they're going to go for it and are already trying

Page 12: Straight Shuter gossip column -- CNN could blitz news veteran Wolf Blitzer as the network revamps its lineup and TV is a young person's game and no one knows that better than Wolf and after 31 years at CNN, he sees new faces getting promoted and knows his days are numbered and Jim Acosta and Poppy Harlow are the future of CNN, not Wolf -- although Wolf's airtime has been cut as Jake Tapper's role expands, he isn't bitter or angry but instead he's grateful for an amazing run

* Love It or List It star Hilary Farr is moving on to her own show and leaving partner David Visentin in the dust -- Hilary's new show is basically the same one she and David have been doing for years, with him edited out and David was blindsided by the news and he knows HGTV has sent out a casting notice for the new show and he's hurt and angry especially because Love It or List It hasn't been renewed yet

* Sacked Dancing with the Stars host Tom Bergeron has reached out to Chris Harrison after he stepped away from The Bachelor amid a racist scandal -- Tom wasn't fired over a scandal, but he knows exactly what Chris is going through because both of them thought they had a job for life, but nothing lasts forever -- Tom is a good guy and wants Chris to know he's around if Chris needs anything

* Tom Felton, who played Draco Malfoy in the Harry Potter films, spruced up for the camera (picture)

Page 13: Brooke Shields isn't letting a busted leg keep her down but she's taking her recovery one step at a time -- she shared an Instagram video showing her cautiously hobbling on crutches and explained she broker her femur and she was beginning to mend -- she didn't reveal what caused the unlucky break

* Outspoken actress Rose McGowan is living a charmed life in Mexico and the Harvey Weinstein accuser has headed south of the border and vows never to return to the United States -- she got her permanent residency card from Mexico and is grateful to have it and says it's a really healing land and it is truly magical -- she moved at the dawn of the COVID-19 pandemic because she knew it was going to get really bad in America and she had a moment to figure out where she wanted to be

* Picky perfectionist Blake Shelton listens to around 300 songs to choose what to record for each of his albums, according to his longtime producer -- music pro Scott Hendricks said he wades through nearly 3000 tracks by professional songwriters to select tunes for Blake to consider and then Blake methodically whittles down the nominees until he's certain which songs he wants to record but Scott admitted that process is more difficult for him culling the 300 from the 3000 -- Scott, who has worked with Blake for most of his career, said of their close professional relationship that the chemistry works and they have recorded several hundred or more songs together and they are getting ready to go do some more

Page 14: Crime

Page 15: Killer kingpin Joaquin "El Chapo" Guzman's busted beauty queen bride will be marked for death behind bars -- if Emma Coronel Aispuro snitches to the feds about the bloodthirsty Mexican Sinaloa drug cartel long run by her caged husband, she'll put a big fat bulls-eye on her back -- according to a federal complaint, Coronel was intimately involved in her husband's multibillion-dollar drug-running racket and acted as his criminal agent while he was on the lam and the mother of El Chapo's two young daughters helped mastermind her spouse's daring 2015 tunnel escape from a Mexican prison and also paid him $100,000 for another failed bust-out a year later -- they are going to put the heat on her to spill more details on other top operatives in the cartel and take them down, too, but if she spills, it will be open season on her on the inside

Page 16: Dr. Dre appears to rap about estranged wife Nicole Young in a song filled with angry, explicit lyrics calling someone in his life a greedy bitch -- DJ Silk previewed part of a new track from Dre full of digs presumably at Nicole, with whom he has been locked in a nasty divorce -- his lyrics include: Trying to kill me with them lies and that perjury/ I see you trying to f--k me while I'm in surgery / In ICU death bed on some money s--t / Greedy bitch take a pic / Girl you know how money get

* Hollywood Hookups -- Lorenzo Lamas is set to wed for the sixth time to model Kenna Scott, Justin Hartley and Chrishell Stause are officially divorced, Adam Rippon is engaged to Jussi-Pekka Kajaala

Page 17: Former Home Improvement kid Zachery Ty Bryan has pleaded guilty to two felony counts of domestic violence -- Zachery, now 39, has been sentenced to three years of probation and will also have to take part in a batterer intervention program

* John Mayer has dated a succession of famous singers including Katy Perry, Taylor Swift and Halsey and he hopes they write chart-topping songs about him and admitted he'd be jazzed if his exes enshrined him in song, saying sometimes a song is so good he hopes it's about him and he even scours their lyrics for clues -- Taylor already has several tracks that have been linked to John including Dear John

* Ruthless chef Gordon Ramsay said he's cooked up his own plan to keep his kids humble -- he has five kids with wife Tana: Megan, twins Holly and Jack, Tilly and Oscar but said he plans to leave most of his reported $200 million fortune to charity -- Gordon explained his kids must tidy up after dinners, can only fly coach and are expected to learn how to cook for themselves and he's forbidden them from taking costly taxis and the foulmouthed foodie insisted they don't swear

Page 18: American Life

Page 19: Roseanne Barr was blindsided by a humiliating new scandal after risque photos from the early '90s recently emerged which appear to show her teenage daughters licking her boobs -- Roseanne posed for the shots with her two youngest girls at a Glamour Shots studio in Iowa more than 25 years ago and the photographer who claimed he snapped the fake lesbian lovefest but did not want to be named dished Roseanne and daughters Jessica and Jennifer who are now in their mid-40s happily hammed it up for the camera but decades later Roseanne and her daughters are all mortified and embarrassed by these pics; they were horsing around years ago and never thought they'd see the light of day

Page 20: Cover Story -- Still recovering from agonizing back surgery, Tiger Woods was pushing himself to the limit when he flew off a California cliff into a career-crushing car accident -- lawmen said the golf legend was lucky to be alive after the horrific wreck that shattered his right leg -- the accident only added to Tiger's physical problems; his movement has been restricted since a fifth back operation in December and he was unable to play golf despite an appearance at a local tournament the weekend before the bloody wreck -- at a press conference days before cheating death, Tiger admitted he was worried about his physical condition and his ability to play again, saying a lot of it is based on his surgeons and doctors and therapist and making sure he does it correctly and he doesn't have a lot of wiggle room left -- Tiger could barely move, and it seemed to get him down and his back rehab has been brutal and he was hobbling around and distraught but he refused to give into his condition and his tough-as-nails mindset could have contributed to the crash: when a person is overwhelmed by physical pain, that dominates everything they do and if you're behind the wheel of a car and in physical pain, it can distract you and likely lead to this kind of disaster -- Tiger was eager to get to a TV taping on the morning disaster struck and he seemed impatient when he left the Terranea Resort in Rancho Palos Verdes, an L.A. suburb, just after 7 a.m. and although traffic cameras show he was driving within the speed limit, his Genesis GV80 SUV crossed the center median onto the opposite side of the road and flipped -- authorities said Tiger appeared lucid to first responders and there were no signs the recovering addict was under the influence of alcohol or drugs and they did not request a blood test when Tiger was rushed to the hospital from the crash site and the incident was an accident -- Tiger was taken to nearby Harbor-UCLA Medical Center, where doctors said his broken bones protruded through his right leg and they put a rod in his leg and used screws and pins to stabilize the break and his ankle -- it will take three to four months to heal and then eight months of physical therapy and it is unlikely he will ever run again and he may have a limp and in terms of golf, just walking for extended periods of time will be a big deal and recovery will be agonizing; it's a very real possibility that Tiger's taken his final swing

Page 21: Addiction experts warned Tiger Woods' recovery will test his sobriety after his stint in rehab for prescription painkiller use and it is very, very common for a patient in recovery to relapse after a trauma like the one suffered by Tiger and exposure to painkillers administered directly or prescribed after a physical trauma is highly likely to trigger a relapse -- Tiger will probably need painkillers to get through this, but he'll also need to be connected with like-minded people to keep him away from his old thinking that pills are the solution to his problems

Page 22: Desperate Ghislaine Maxwell has offered to renounce her British and French citizenships in a new bid to get out of jail -- the disgraced socialite's last two stabs at freedom including one package offering $22.5 million as bond money were rejected by a judge who deemed her a flight risk -- now according to her lawyers, Ghislaine will formally commence the procedure to renounce her foreign citizenship to satisfy any concerns the court may have that she may try to seek a safe haven in France or the U.K. -- Justice Department officials were concerned Ghislaine would flee to France, where she was born, since the country has no extradition treaty with the U.S.

* Woody Allen claimed his own words are being used to attack him in the bombshell Allen v. Farrow documentary -- Woody has repeatedly denied adopted daughter Dylan Farrow's claims he sexually abused her when she was seven at her mom Mia Farrow's home -- Woody blasted the documentary which rehashes the claims as a shoddy hit piece and a hatched job riddled with falsehoods adding the filmmakers stole from his autobiography

Page 26: Twice-divorced Ricki Lake's engagement to California attorney Ross Burningham has insiders fearing she may suffer yet another heartbreak -- she announced her happy news on Instagram but Ricki has seen far more than her share of bad luck in the romance department and everyone is praying this final shot at love doesn't end in despair and it's never Ricki's fault, but she's never found a man who could keep her happy

Page 28: A lurid landscape of drug-fueled orgies, suicidal thoughts and fake sexual enthusiasm will play out in a new television series based on model and reality star Holly Madison's X-rated confessions from her shocking 2015 biography Down the Bunny Hole -- Madison first exposed the sleazy details of how she and other young women were plied with drugs and coerced to participate in sex parties with Playboy founder Hugh Hefner in exchange for acting as his girlfriends and getting to live inside the iconic L.A. mansion along with a weekly $1000 stipend -- the limited series will star actress Samara Weaving as Holly, who was a member of Hef's harem between 2001 and 2008 -- Holly, Kendra Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt became the notorious stars of the reality show The Girls Next Door which debuted in 2005 and focused on their seemingly glamorous life with Hef but glossed over the dark secrets behind the scenes -- in her bombshell confessions, Holly revealed the 22-bedroom manor was actually a foul pigsty filled with stained mattresses where Hef's live-in ladies were forced to perform weird bedroom rituals and look excited by it

Page 29: Jack Osbourne has listed his sprawling California home for rent at $16,500 a month -- the 35-year-old son of Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne is offering the five-bedroom, 5600-square-foot home in Studio City unfurnished -- Sharon was recently seen outside the home with moving vans helping Jack prep the property -- Jack, who suffers from multiple sclerosis, bought the home in 2014 when he was married to Lisa Stelly; the couple divorced in 2018 and share three children: Andy, Pearl and Minnie

* Heidi Klum has snipped all threads tying her to dad Gunther Klum after the cosmetics and modeling honcho skipped her wedding -- Heidi dumped her manager dad after he snubbed her August 2019 ceremony in Capri with guitarist Tom Kaulitz of the band Tokio Hotel and she has also ended her German enterprise Heidi Klum GmbH, originally overseen by Gunther -- Heidi and her dad had a falling out over Tom and Gunther never really approved of him and was dead set against the marriage and it drove a wedge in their relationship

Page 32: Health Watch

* Ask the Vet -- an African Gray Parrot with a feather-picking problem

Page 34: Barack Obama broke a buddy's nose over a racist remark -- he revealed the two classmates were playing basketball when his friend hurled a racial slur and he popped him in the face and broke his nose, Obama told Bruce Springsteen on their podcast Renegades: Born in the USA -- Obama said he doesn't think his pal even knew what the word meant, just that it was meant to be hurtful

* Country singer Keith Urban has shrunk to 140 pounds as the former addict is hooked on a bizarre diet of nuts and berries and even worse, the five-foot-ten crooner appears to be growing thinner and friends are worried the stress of his demanding career and his desperate desire to be a good husband to Nicole Kidman may push him over the edge -- no one sees him eating much more than handfuls of raw almonds or sunflower seeds and berries washed down with gallons of water -- though he's been sober since 2006, pals fear the struggle to avoid giving in to temptation as well as hearing Nicole purportedly mended fences with ex-hubby Tom Cruise may be weighing on the star -- despite his bony appearance, Keith thinks he looks great

Page 40: Evil ISIS terrorists are using the COVID-19 pandemic as cover while they rebuild their network and mastermind new attacks and both Iraq and the U.S. are in their crosshairs -- because the West has been focused on dealing with the pandemic, ISIS and new groups sprung from their shattered forces have been reloading and plotting revenge, according to Ryan Mauro of the terrorist-monitoring Clarion Intelligence Network -- the pandemic has brought decreased confidence in Western governments, which has emboldened the terrorists to launch sleeper cell attacks on foreign soil

Page 42: Red Carpet -- Anya Taylor-Joy

[hughiecampbelle]

Wildflowers (Shelby!Reader × Bonnie Gold Oneshot)

Character/s: Bonnie, Aberama mention

Word Count: 1,365

Inspired By: Silver by Nim Nim

Tag List: @dontdowhatisayandnobodygetshurt @myriadimagines @lilyswritings @encounterthepast @death-of-a-mermaid @lotsoffandomimagines @woahitslucyylu @obsessedunicorn24 @thedarkqueenofavalon @fangirlsarah16 @theshelbyclan

A/N: Another Bonnie fic! Though he's still not a character I write for, I couldn't stop thinking about this plot. This has been sitting in my writers block folder for weeks!!! I really did love my original idea, but I also think what it turned into is pretty good, too :) I haven't been feeling confident at all in my writing, which is part of the reason why I haven't posted a fic lately. I do love some paragraphs, but others I just wanna throw in the trash. It can't stop me from posting it though because I really do wanna get through this block. I'm thinking of doing a part two? Lmk if you'd want that! Feedback is always appreciated 💜💖💜

FIC MASTERLIST PART ONE. / PART TWO.

WANNA BE ADDED TO THE TAG LIST?

Beneath the clouds, so grey, so sad, sunlight blessed the trees, the leaves dancing in the breeze. Grass, overgrown, free to sway. Birds, bugs, everything seemed so alive, so eager to breathe and shout and let their presence be known. Unapologetically there, in their own skin. Going home, all of them, awaiting the impending storm. Static hung in the air, a heavy curtain, a blanket on your breastbone. Too thick to breath. The wind picking up. Brushing the leaves, the petals and pollen, across the stone pathway, down the dirt road, through the fields of wildflowers. You sat in the heart of it all, the warmth of the bright morning wrapping you in a it's arms, cupping your cheeks, holding all your broken pieces together. The heat in the air tracing your skin, kissing your face, as if it wanted to thaw every bad thing that had ever happened from your bones, stripped of what used to make you so angry. A warm step beneath your feet, your spine arched, in between your palms a mug. Eyelids heavy, wary of the bright outside growing dim, welcoming the day with a soft, cautious hello. Thunder rumbling, warning, threatening, baring it's teeth at the world. Lightning would follow soon, more timid, dancing on its toes, reminding you of the baby of the family, your youngest brother How you missed him. In no time, just as the storm, they would be here, and like the bugs, the babes, the blossom, you would be ready.

Prick and pinch your flesh all you wanted, this was no dream.

A home in the countryside. Tall, lopsided, full of warmth, of love. Standing on its own, reminding you so much of him, of what you were together. Defiant. Stubborn. Strong. Chipped bowls, and baskets of fruit, the sweetest stuffed between sugar and pastry. Patchwork quilts and holes in socks. Timid smiles, light touches, the faint smell of vanilla, lavender, of the bouquet he plucked on his way back. Honeyed kisses, promises of sweet dreams, of perfect mornings. Fireflies like fallen stars, a moon to sweet not to nibble at. A sleepy breeze, urging you to bed. This was your escape. Your hideaway, as far from the city as you could get. A place to yourselves, where time froze. The seasons changed, throwing you into the icy grips of the winter, the sweltering heat of the summer, but you, and him, together the same. Together safe, happy. Free.

It wasn't always like this, though.

Blood splatter. Silver jewelry. Broken bottles. A haze, all of it. The story torn apart and sewed together, limb by limb, coming to you in flashes, in nightmares, waking in a cold sweat. A time of regret, embarassment, of a pain so deep the wound never stopped bleeding. Still hasn't. Covering up a sadness no one cared to see, to acknowledge. A family only in words. Invisible, ignored, wanting to be seen, your screams of help falling on deaf ears. You were an object to them, and the rest of the world. A toy. The city lights bright, blinding, drawing you in on their own dark vices. Blacking out. Drink after drink until you were stumbling, fumbling, forgetting your own name. Falling for strangers. Skin on skin, their hot breath melting your neck, starved kisses up and down your body until you lay beside them, crushed, wanting to scrub yourself clean of this routine. An escape. A search for a home that never belonged to you. Drown out the thoughts, the fears, the misery. Putting your trust into their words. Once a Shelby, always a Shelby. Theirs to carry was also yours. A gun by birthright. A shallow grave you'd fall into too young, but just as guilty. Slip from the covers, one last swig to carry on. They wouldn't see you for days. A bender. Come down slowly, step by step, until you were light enough to face them, face the job, face the body behind the barrel. It was all the same.

This wasn't the life you wanted to live.

You didn't want to live at all if it meant going through the motions.

Calling him. One night, from someone else's phone, their body breathing shallow, steady, wrapped in nothing but grimy sheets. Another handprint on your thigh, another nameless face you'd wonder about. On the edge of the mattress, begging, desperate, scared. A noose like a necklace hanging around your neck. Dainty, delicate, dangerous. You needed someone, anyone. If they answered, it wasn't too late. That's what you told yourself. He wasn't the first number you dialed. Sibling by sibling, your brothers first, then sister. The bar, the shop, even your aunt too busy. You weren't quite sure why he was next, that he was there at all, Aberama giving you it for emergencies. Maybe it was the last number you could remember. Maybe you wanted a second chance, maybe you wanted to live after all. You barely even knew him, or his brown eyed boy. The few times you spoke he was warm, inviting, at times a little akward in a way that made you smile. But he picked up. His voice rusty, raspy, woken too early in the morning. A hint of panic. No call came with happy news at an hour like this. You apologized for waking him, regret pooling in your gut, spilling out into words like the vomit on your chin, but he stopped you, cut you off, not wanting you to hang up. There had to be a reason. So, he listened. A boy with big dreams listened until the sun came up. To the shakes, the sobs, the grief in your voice for the person you lost, the person you wanted so desperately to kill. To finally put an end to.

That was almost a year ago.

The Dark Days. They had a name, a date, a birthday, and a time of death. Those were the months, years, mere seconds, flashes of time you had a hard time remembering, that you wanted so desperately to leave behind. Hazy, drunken, angry. You wanted to hurt yourself more than anyone, and you did. But now, you could move on. He was there when no one else was. At first, as a friend. Then, something more. Someone more. The one to catch you when the floor fell through, when your body lay broken after time and time again hitting rock bottom. You loved Bonnie, and he loved you. It was simple, effortless, the only thing that ever made sense in this big, twisted life. The city too enticing, the bloodline too polluted, there was no way you could have shed your shadow in a place like that. So, you found this place together. Scraped together paychecks, pocket change, selling what you could. Taking solace in the comforts of one another. Making it your own.

Not a drop since.

The thunder clapped, applauding, warning you. Rain pounding on the roof, plopping in deep puddles, watering the wildflowers. A dreary grey tint cast overhead, illuminating the greens of mother nature. Lightning striking, slicing the sky right down the middle. You watched from the kitchen window, Bonnie behind you, his hand grabbing yours. One last second of peace before the storm ripped you apart. Windchimes bawling, crying, begging you to run. Now. The animals quiet, listening, anticipating the threat yet to come. Not the storm, though. But them. A black car drove softly through the mucky waters, mud splashing on the shiny black paint. Closer, closer, stopping short of the lopsided fence either you or Bonnie had yet to finish painting. He always promised he'd get to it one day. Long coats and caps with blades stitched with thread and blood. You hadn't seen any of them since. Leaving without a goodbye, without another word, disappearing in the night with a promise of a home of your own. You weren't sure how they found you, why they came at all. Whatever they said, or did, would never make you change your mind, make you go back.

Not to the Dark Days.

You weren't interested in being a Shelby anymore, you were a Gold now.

[applejacks1552]

Day 7 - Theme: AU for Rogue and Gambit week 2020

(Also Day 3 - Domesticity)

Entire story can be found here:

#Rogue/Gambitweek2020 #Rogue/Remyweek2020 #Romy #Rambit #AU #Gambit #Rogue

Children of X

CHAPTER 8

The sun was seated on the horizon with morning properly underway, as the twins strategically circled Gambit out on the dusty savannah. 

Becca, crouching slightly, cocked her head at Ollie moving her eyes just so, then lifted her chin to the right, communicating her intentions silently. Ollie scrunched his nose at her suggestion, shook his head no, and nodded upward to convey another meaning. Meanwhile, Remy stood stalk still between them grinning and at the ready, a blindfold tied snugly over his eyes.

Rogue and Storm sat off several yards away, resting casually on a sizable cluster of rocks located nearby the disguised entrance to the underground lair. They looked on with mild interest as the kids' “homework” commenced. The assignment for them was simple enough - steal the blindfold. Meanwhile, Remy's job was merely to evade their attempts without leaving the circle he had outlined in the dirt.

The twins rushed him together, Becca attempting a flying grab for his head, while Ollie tried to sweep his legs. Remy dodged them both, smoothly rolling to the left as the kids nearly collided in their enthusiasm.

He laughed, “Good try. But you’ll have to do better than dat.”

As they regrouped for another attempt, Rogue was engrossed with the Wakanden tablet Storm had lent her. She inserted the drive she had smuggled back from her mission and began pouring over a schematic, delighted to find she could pull it out into a 3-dimensional model with the advanced tech.

"Your next target?" Ororo inquired looking over with curiosity.

Rogue nodded, studying the model intensely with a furrowed brow, "Yeah."

Storm inspected the diagram, "Where is this exactly?" 

"Just South of Chenjianping ..." Rogue answered. "Looks like a run o’ the mill factory, but it goes a lot deeper down. See?" She gestured.

Storm nodded her agreement. "How many bases will this have been now?"

Rogue was thoughtful, recounting their targets, "We hit the one in Nebraska first. Wasn't much there anymore really. Still abandoned since it was originally blown up. Same goes for the one in the Kerguelen Islands an' the theatre in Seattle, … then there was Paris … Anchorage … All the connections were already closed, though."

“All this searching … when will you know it is enough?” Storm asked in her straightforward, placid manner.

Rogue scowled slightly, “When he’s gone. And for good this time.”

“Still X-Men. Even after all this time. Forever fighting the hopeless cause.” Storm observed with bemusement, looking back to the training session.

Rogue frowned. “Ah don’t like it any better than you do, ‘Ro. But there isn’t a lot of choice in the matter."

“That was not meant as a criticism, Rogue. Just that … I’m sorry it has come to all this. As X-Men, sacrificing all that we have … I had always hoped it meant we could find some peace in our time and that our children might do the same. That they’d be the ones to live in the dream.” Storm reflected wistfully. “They’re getting quite good though.” she nodded, as Becca finally managed to glance a thwarted grab off Gambit’s shoulder while he was avoiding another kick from Ollie.

“Dat’s my girl.” Remy encouraged. “C’mon now, Ollie. Get in here. Not gonna let your old man win now, are ya?"

Rogue smiled, glancing over. “It’s kind of amazing watchin’ them grow. Seein’ what they can do. Ah see myself in them sometimes, 'Ro.” She sighed. “But yeah ... then I wonder … are we doing right by them? Was it wrong of us, bringing kids into all this? The X-Men? The Thieves Guild? Spendin’ their whole life in hiding because of who and what we are?”

“As I recall,” Storm smirked, “It was not exactly as though you and Remy planned this out. Fate made the decision for you.”

Rogue laughed, “Well … fate or not … can’t say Ah wasn’t a willing participant.”

Storm echoed her laugh with a heartier one.

They turned their attention back to the skirmish, where the kids were still losing.

Rogue whistled to them and when they looked her way, she made a twirling signal with her finger. They nodded understanding and paused a moment. She bent down to scoop something up.

"Hey! No help from de peanut gallery!" Remy objected in her general direction.

Rogue skipped a stone past his left foot with a sly smirk and when his head turned toward the movement and sound, the kids pounced on him, barely missing this time.

Rogue and Storm shared another good laugh.

"Jus' tryin' ta even out the playin' field, sugah." Rogue hooted at him in a sweet molasses taunt.

Remy recovered from his sharp roll away, shook his head and smiled his devious smile, muttering to himself, “Dis woman”.

"Seven years is it now? And with the very man some said could never settle down.” Storm observed. “Yet here you both are. And in all this time you’ve been almost entirely on the run too. Hasn't that been difficult?”

Rogue watched as the sparring continued, “Can’t say it’s always been easy or anywhere near perfect. We're apart so often ... too often, really. An' the times when we are together, sometimes it's just about gettin’ through it all an' surviving. And sure, once in a while Ah kinda have the urge to knock him unconscious for maybe an hour or two.” She smirked, “But …” she looked back over as Remy dodged another of the kids’ attempts with a fancy flip and devil-may-care laugh. “Yeah, Ah don’t know what Ah’d do without him.”

“I imagine Remy would echo those sentiments. Even now, the man is still showing off for you.” Storm pointed out.

“Pfffhh, he’s showing off for whoever happens to be watching him.” Rogue noted wryly.

The kids had finally gotten ahold of Remy by each arm, but they still couldn’t actually bring him down low enough to grab the blindfold. Laughing he pulled them over into a heap where the lesson quickly devolved into an all-out tickle war. Though as his blindfold finally fell loose in the scuffle, Remy's eyes caught Rogue’s for a moment and the same intensity was still there between them. The same intensity that there had been back on the beach and ever since their reunion - the building anticipation they were both trying to stave off and ignore.

“Thanks for pulling some strings with T’Challa.” Rogue mentioned refocusing and rifling through the data some more. “Hope that didn’t cause anything … awkward?”

“We have an understanding.” Storm explained serenely. “Maybe you’d call it an arrangement? At any rate, there are some loyalties that can never be completely severed. When you've been as close as we have ... that's forever, regardless the circumstances.”

Rogue wasn't sure exactly of her meaning, but she understood the sentiment at any rate and nodded.

“Just let us know when ya'll need to kick us out.” Rogue answered. "Don’t want to overstay our welcome. What IS this place, anyway?"

"A safe house, of sorts. Or a secret rendezvous spot." Storm answered with a conspiratorial grin. "Depending on your point of view, I suppose."

Remy came walking over to join them, calling over this shoulder, “Why don't ya'll go play for a bit, D’Accord? Let the grown-ups talk awhile."

The kids grumbled about how they WERE grown up, but skittered off anyway eagerly looking for bugs to catch.

"Awww, non. Don' tell me you ladies are over here talkin' shop." Remy groaned, noticing Rogue with the building mock-up projecting from the tablet in her hands.

"Hey now, Ororo is nearly as expert a thief as you are. Ah just wanted to run this by -" Rogue started as Gambit sidled up next to her, his fingers settling hungrily between her bare shoulder blades, and tapped the schematic decisively off.

"The key there bein' nearly." he teased. "Now let’s get back to dat later, eh? How 'bout I go dig out the bottle of champagne I stashed in the fridge and we celebrate this fine reunion wit' a proper toast?"

"Remy, it's barely 7 am." Storm observed in a droll tone.

"Sure, on Wakandan time. But on California time, de night is young an' it's jus' about bedtime for some kids." he smirked, his eyes catching Rogue's again with that same fiery gaze. "Meanin' we can finally relax, neh? Be right back."

He hopped up and slipped into the nearby hideout before either of the women could object further.

Rogue shrugged and grinned after him. "We can get back to it tomorrow. But Ah think we'll need a different strategy for this target. It's one the X-Men have never encountered before and bigger. Ah'd really like your input, ‘Ro. An' Ah know Remy will too."

"Judging by the size alone, a one man mission will not be sufficient. But then what of the children?" Storm looked at her friend with concern.

"Well they ain't comin' with, obviously." Rogue acknowledged. "But yeah, we'll need to make some arrangements. There's no way Ah'm lettin' Remy run this next one solo though. An' Ah know he'll try."

Gambit re-emerged, champagne and flutes in hand. He passed the delicate glasses to Rogue. She cringed as he put his freed fingers to the top of the bottle to lightly charge the cork. It shot into the air and dissolved in a buzzing fushia fizz of sparks. 

"See? I've gotten pretty good at dis." he grinned triumphantly and took a glass from Rogue who raised an amused brow at him as he poured and offered the first glass to Storm.

She raised a hand palm out. "Thank you my friend, but I will have to pass."

"Aww c'mon, padnat. Not even one? Can't hardly toast our gracious host dis way." he said, laying on as much charm as possible while he passed the glass back to Rogue instead.

"I have my reasons, Remy LeBeau. Now if you want to be a true gentleman, there's a carafe of freshly squeezed juice in the kitchen." she admonished him a little sternly.

Gambit cocked his head at her, a little taken aback, but recovered to smoothly reply with an over-the-top, "As you wish." complete with mocking bow. He took an empty glass from Rogue and handed her the bottle, shooting her a contemplative look before retreating back to the kitchen.

Rogue glanced at Storm a little uncertainly and took a sip from her glass. Strong of principle though she was, Storm wasn't one to avoid indulging in the simple pleasures of life or to let Remy irritate her.

She was formulating something to say, when Becca slipped up onto her lap wrapping her arms around her mother's neck. Rogue reflexively pulled her baby girl in closer, setting the flute of champagne aside.

"Mama, can we go flyin'?" the little girl inquired sweetly, big eyes demanding her full attention.

Rogue pressed her forehead to her daughter's, rubbing turned-up nose to turned-up nose. "Ah dunno, sugah." She sighed.

Storm laughed with amusement. "So I see Remy has passed more than one of his skills on to the next generation?"

"Ah'll say. This one gives him a run for his money."

"Pllleeeaassee???" Becca laid on thicker and sweeter and was soon joined by a, "C'mon! Can we?" plead from Ollie.

"We're still under cover here." Rogue told them very seriously. "King T'Challa is doin' us a big favor lettin' us stay. So we can't do anything that's gonna attract too much attention."

"One moment, Anna. I think I can be of assistance." Storm interceded, hers eyes clouding over to a bright white and lifting her hands skyward. A thick fog swirled up out of thin air, then spread upward and outward to encase their entire camp in a tall hollow cylinder of cloud, hiding them from view for miles.

The kids looked around with an impressed "ooooohhhh" and ""aaawwww".

"Alright." Rogue caved, grinning at Storm as Ollie hopped up into her lap also. "But after this, it's to bed with the both of ya."

She tucked a child safely under each of her strong arms and they shot off into the sky with delighted squeals and whoops.

Storm was watching them with a satisfied and wistful smile, when Remy rejoined her. He handed her the glass of juice and took a seat, looking up to observe his family and admire Storm's handiwork.

"Thanks for dat, 'Ro. An' for everythin' else. So ... How far along are you, chére?" he asked, casually pouring himself some champagne.

Storm sipped her juice and swirled the glass thoughtfully, glancing sideways at Gambit to contemplate him, then finally answered. "A few months."

" ... A celebratory toast then?" Remy raised his glass slightly, but retained a sober tone.

"Perhaps in time, Remy." she answered with measured enthusiasm.

"... an' de father?" he started, trailing off before finishing the question.

"Doesn't know yet ... because I don't know for certain yet." she calmly explained.

Remy raised an eyebrow and nodded. "An' the King?"

"I'm not going to get into that now." Storm stated matter-of-factly.

"Sorry, chére. Dat things are ... complicated. Also means ya won't be joining us on dis next mission den." Remy took another long sip.

"No, I am afraid not." Storm nodded. "Can we keep this between us?"

"Sure. If dat's what you want. But Rogue's gonna wonder. Think she was hopin’ you'd come with me or her to China." he explained.

"I would not ask you to keep my secret from your own wife, Remy. But until I can tell the father of this child, it needs to stay between the three of us at least." Storm noted.

"We understan' more than most 'bout the need for discretion." Remy observed and gave her a reassuring smile. "If there's anything we can do ta help?"

"There is not. But I'm glad you are here." Storm looked skyward. "It does me good to see what this could look like ... in time."

"Not like you don' have a choice." Remy started.

"I have considered the options, my friend." She interupted. "But with so few mutants in the world, it seems wrong to deny this one a chance."

"The X-ranks be growin’ den, though maybe not in th' way ol' Chuck used ta recruit." Remy barked an ironic laugh.

Storm shot him a raised eyebrow, as Rogue suddenly lit down in their midst with two screaming kids.

"AGAIN!" they shouted in chorus.

"Nuh-uh! Nope! Ah said one ride and then ta bed." she metted out firmly. 

"Awwww. Bed?! But the sun is out!" Olivier argued, collapsing bonelessly to the ground in protest, and Becca piled on a sassy and exasperated, "Yeah!" throwing her hands up at the bright sky.

"Don't try my patience." Rogue shot them a look. "It's nearly midnight in California. C'mon now. Tell Miss Munroe thank you and goodnight."

"Thank you, Auntie Ro." Rebecca shot glumly and Ollie added a "G'night." pulling himself up as Rogue herded them toward the hideout entrance.

Remy stood, but Rogue insisted, "Let me get them ta bed, sugah. It's been such a long time since Ah got to. "

"Sure, chére. You get them settled. Then mebbe … we should be hittin’ the hay too, yeah?" his eyes caught hers again.

She grinned and cocked her head at him. "Maybe."

Storm followed their exchange, adding, "I think I'll see if Illyana will take me back to the States with her for the day. I need to catch up with a few people. Then you all can have a quiet place to rest."

"Oh ... uh, if you want to, 'Ro. But don't go on our account." Rogue answered a little self-conscientiously, tucking a loose lock of hair behind her ear.

"Nonsense. I will return later." Storm insisted with a knowing grin.

"Alright. Well, goodnight then. And thanks." Rogue answered gratefully. She glanced from Storm back to Remy, who had both kids wrapped up in a bear hug.

“G’night, mes petits.”

They scampered into the hut and down below. He watched Rogue follow them, looking back over her shoulder at him once more as she disappeared from sight. Then he looked back to find Ororo watching him watching her.

He smirked a little self-consciously, “What?”

“Nothing … just … I’m glad for you. For both of you. Some things, at least, don't change.”

CHAPTER 9

The twins were settled in a room down at the end of a hallway off the central room, one meant for sleeping a small garrison it seemed. Several individual beds were vertically and horizontally stacked like stair-step shelves that jutted out from the walls in a mysterious fashion, independent of any supports, railings or ladders. The ceiling and walls were inlaid with tiny periwinkle bioluminescent lights that faintly alternated in patterns that resembled flowers then trees then stars. Becca, still hyper off the adrenaline rush from flying with Rogue, was already having a grand time of flipping and swinging amongst the many beds like a spider monkey. Ollie had made a solid, but somewhat more cautious climb to the top most bunk, standing there like king of the mountain and surveying his new dominion. 

Rogue ordered them both back down to Earth and set Ollie to brushing his teeth at the basin, while she lovingly unwound Becca’s plaits and brushed out her fine, soft baby hair. It was more Remy's texture than hers, thicker and straighter than her own. It still impressed her that Remy had gotten accustomed to braiding it in her absence, though undoubtedly it was no challenge for his talented fingers. There was something unspoken between them … about the things they would carry on for each other in case there ever came a day when one of them didn’t return. Rogue found herself brushing longer than she need and stopped, giving her girl a gentle squeeze of affection. She never figured she’d be good at this … want this … miss this even.

Rogue helped the kids change into their night clothes, the simple garments already seemed worn and to be getting small on them. She would need to pick them up some new clothes soon. It was on her mind more so now than when she had left for her mission - how quickly they were growing. For mutants, growing meant getting closer to the day their powers would emerge in full. And for their children in particular, getting their full powers meant bringing them closer to the day they would be lost to their destiny. Rogue shuddered and pushed the thought from her mind. They weren’t there yet. There was still time. Time to make a difference. And time yet to enjoy all these little fleeting moments.

“What book are we reading then?” she asked, seating herself on the edge of a lower bunk.

"Here, Mama." Ollie pulled a beat-up volume from his bag and handed it to Rogue, climbing into the bunk where she sat. Becca scrambled in next to him. 

"Move over!"

"I was here first!"

"Alright, alright ... no fighting or no book." Rogue threatened half-seriously.

Becca stuck her tongue out at her brother, who crossed his arms and huffed at her, but Rogue ignored them.

She turned the novel over to read the cover and chuckled to herself with a roll of her eyes, "Of course ..." then she turned to where the bookmark rested. Pulling it out, she cleared her throat and started, "Chapter 4, The Keeper of The Keys".

The twins listened with rapt interest as she described the magical giant man breaking into the isolated safe house out on a stormy sea, the way he put the human oppressors in their place, and the good news he delivered to their protagonist.

"You're a wizard, Harry." Rogue read in her best Hagrid voice and continued through the chapter as he received his letter and arguing followed and -

"Why isn't there a special school for mutants?" Becca suddenly interjected, looking at Rogue with her piercing eyes.

Olivier, though annoyed at the interruption of the story, gawked contemplatively at Rogue as well, curious for her answer.

" ... well ... there used to be ..." she started.

"But there isn't anymore?" Ollie cocked his head.

" ... sort of ... " Rogue went forward cautiously.

"You mean there IS one?!" Becca sat up with excited interest.

"No, no ... just ... there's a place that ... well, that takes care of mutant kids who don't have anyone to look after them." Rogue explained.

The twins glanced to each other and back to their Mother.

"Don't they have parents?" Ollie wondered.

"They're orphans, right?" offered Becca.

"Lots of reasons." Rogue answered calmly. "Now how about we finish-"

"Is it big? Like Hogwarts?" Becca queried on with more excitement.

Rogue grumbled to herself and massaged her forehead. "No. It's very small and very secret."

"Like Hogwarts." Ollie whispered with awe.

"It's NOT like Hogwarts." Rogue insisted. "Now do ya want ta hear the rest of this story or not?"

Ollie bit his lip, but Becca just frowned thoughtfully.

After a pause filled with silence and giving an *ahem*, Rogue began to continue on with the story again, "Why aren't you supposed to do magic-"

"But WHY is the mutant school so small?" Becca interrupted again.

Rogue sighed and put the mark back in the book, this time closing it in her lap.

Ollie whined, but Rogue reached out to touch their faces and look them in the eyes as she said gently, "Because ... there aren't a lot of us left."

"But why?" Ollie asked, his small brow now also furrowed to match his sister's.

"It's complicated, darlin'. Mostly ... it's because people didn't want to have mutants born in their families a while back and they took a medicine to stop it from happening." Rogue told them honestly.

" ... oh ..." the little boy bowed his head.

"Hey now ... see here ..." Rogue pulled her babies into her lap. "That doesn't have anything to do with us, alright? People were just scared of what they didn't understand. Maybe there aren't a lot of us anymore. But we're not alone, ok? We have each other and we have friends, people like us."

The kids nodded. They'd met a slew of fellow mutants in their many travels.

“But there aren’t any other kids.” Becca pointed out.

“Sure there are, hon. Remember Josiah? When we were on Chandilar? That place with all the tall buildings?” Rogue asked.

The twins just looked at her blankly and Rogue frowned. “Well … ah guess maybe you were too young to remember. Anyway, the point is there are plenty of other mutant kids, just like you.”

“Do they look like us?” Ollie wondered.

“No, stupid. Everybody looks different. Right, Mama?” Becca insisted triumphantly.

“Hey now, don’t be mean to your brother.” She chastised. “An’ yes, everyone looks different and has different powers. Most kids don’t even have powers ‘til they’re older. Just like we talked about.”

“Can we meet them?” Becca was intense and excited again.

“Alright, alright … time to calm down, both of ya.” Rogue shushed them. “Ah’m sure you will sometime, but Ah ain’t makin’ any promises right now. Now lie down and not another peep until Ah finish this chapter.”

[sweetdeathwrites]

Sapphic, Savvy?

Summary: Sometimes, coming out is harder for some people than others. Kyoko is one of those people.

Warnings: sexual suggestiveness, fears about coming out

~[Kyoko/Fem!Reader]~

(original author’s note, sorry, it’s long–– 

WOW I LOVE KYOKO, MY GIRLFRIEND!!!! #LetKyokoBeMyWife2k17 i love her!! alright, in all seriousness, if there were a lot of wlw reader-inserts, or even girl/gender neutral fits, i probably would've realized I liked girls a lot sooner. And if there were more gender neutral fics I probably would've realized I'm nonbinary sooner too... haha, well, I hope this helps someone! Or is just entertaining! Either is great, haha! I want more Kyoko/reader fics... I love my gf and I'm pretty sure I've only seen one more Kyoko/reader fic here on Luna....if you write any, send them to me, alright? I love Kyoko so much, she's so good and sweet!!! also, that pun in the title? When i first thought of it I snorted out loud. Like that was a thing I actually did because I thought it was just the best pun ever. I actually snorted. also, Bianchi totally has had same gendered lovers. There is no way she hasn't— i mean, she works in the mafia and there HAS to be some situations where she's needed to be a seductress for a woman. Also my head canon for her is that she's not straight. She's definitely had a girlfriend before, before Reborn probably. She's so iconic, the butch and femme ideal, the best of both worlds.... i love her.... ok, shoutout to GuardianAngel07! not for anything in particular (ok there's always reason, but this is just a casual shout out!!1!) but she's a huge inspiration to me and she's so kind, sweet, and supportive, that I think she deserves a shoutout! She deserves more than one, but this will have to do for now! Thanks for everything~)

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The peaceful calm of dawn is broken by the rustling of bedsheets and a duvet over a too-small bed. Your mouth stretched wide in a yawn and you roll over to face your beautiful girlfriend. She smiled, cheeks rosy and her long lashes cast even longer shadows over her cherubic face. You smiled. ‘Sasagawa Kyoko,' you mused, ‘My very own goddess.’ She stirred in her sleep- just the smallest bit- but it was enough for you to freeze and wait for her to settle back down again. Through her window, you could see faint sunbeams cover the horizon and you knew you should be getting up soon, or else you both would be late to school. What a bother. “Kyoko-chan,” you whispered, breath soft and warm in the crook of her neck. A hand gently rubbing the side of her ribcage that was accessible from your awkward angle. Kyoko laid comfortably curled up against you with her hands splayed over your stomach and tangled in your hair. Your leg was tossed over her hip and your toes curled when Kyoko hummed, dreaming sweetly. You called for her again and brought a hand up to caress her face, skimming a thumb over her plump lips. “Baby…” She whined in her sleep, a long, airy noise. You bit your lip. A devious, delicious idea comes to mind and you figure you have just enough time to carry through with it before you have to get ready to go to school- or at least you have time to start it. You leaned over and kissed Kyoko’s shoulder, bare from the thin straps of her silky pink slip, and nipped on it delicately. Kyoko’s breath hitched and you grinned. Slowly, you brought your hands up to brush the hair out of her face and to stroke her with. “Honey…” She still didn’t wake up. Honestly, this girl will be the death of you. With a heavy sigh, you went back to your plan of giving her unrelenting, adoring affection until she wakes. You planted soft, ticklish kisses all up her neck and when you got to her jawline you grazed her soft skin with your teeth. Kyoko made another sound in her sleep, though this time, just a little less innocent. She’s just too good. You curled a strand of her hair behind her ear and out of your way for you to breathe hotly, “Princess…” and she giggled. “Ah,” you said, “I knew you were just pretending.” Kyoko rolled over to face you completely, one hand hiked your leg higher up her hip, up to her waist, and the other hand brushed your own flyaways out of your eyes to she could see you better. “Of course I was. I wanted you to wake me up, like Sleeping Beauty!” “But you’re already my princess, Kyo-chan!” Her laughs and the sound of her joy light up the room. A stealthy arm wrapped around her waist to pull her closer. “You know what, baby?” She smiled. “What?” “When I marry you, on our wedding night, I just can’t wait to get into bed with you. Wait—I-I mean,” You stutter, not at all meaning to make an innuendo but making the best of it, “I already have you in my bed,” Kyoko rolls her eyes, “But I can’t wait to be married to you. It’ll be so sweet. We can wake up and kiss and make breakfast together, eat it on our porch, eat it in our garden. We can be so… domestic, y’know?” Birds sang in the distance and you could feel the refreshing breeze that came through the window on your back. Kyoko’s face, bathed in honey-golden sunlight with her eyes sparkling, was just enough to show that she was just as excited as you were about your future wedding. “I’ll make sure to grow lots of vegetables. You need to keep healthy, honey, I won’t tolerate you getting sick on me!” She scolded you teasingly, punctuating her words with a playful kiss on your nose. “And I,” you retorted, “will make sure that you eat all the cakes I bake for you. I gotta keep you sweet and soft somehow, right?” A delighted laugh meets your ears in response. “Yeah,” she said, “you better do that.” You sighed in content. You never got over how beautiful she was, no matter how long you gazed at her, no matter how many times you get lost in those orange-blossom eyes of hers, no matter how many times you kissed those cherry lips of hers, no matter how many times- “Hey!” She caught your attention. “What’re you doing?” Smirking, you yanked her closer with your leg wrapped around her waist until your hips meet and she gasped. “What aren’t I doing?” Before you had time to make another move, she held you by the nape of your neck and kissed you. Unlike most of her delicate kisses, this one is hotter, needier. It surprised you. No, it’s not even that needy- she’s just trying to prove to you that she can make the first move! Your heart swells with love at her dedication to make you happy, to make things...more interesting, in your relationship. You hummed happily into the kiss. That’s when Kyoko really took charge. Her hands traveled to the front of your sleep shirt and she started unbuttoning it. Wow. This was bold and you were enjoying this new side of Kyoko very much. She slid a well-manicured hand in the opening of your shirt and pressed her palm flat on your stomach. You jumped a little and yelped into the kiss- her hands were cold! As expected, she giggled a little as well, the little minx! Not willing to give up just yet, you squeezed her rear firmly and she bit your lip gently. Your hand- warm- slides up the back of her pretty pink slip and— “Kyoko-chan! Wake up! It’s time to get extremely ready for school!” Ryohei, Kyoko’s older brother with no sense of personal space, barged in the room and you had to pretend like you weren’t just swapping spit and getting hot and heavy with his little sister. “B-Big brother!” she shouted, yanking the fluffy duvet over the two of you until the only visible parts of you were from the chin up. “We’re in our pajamas! My best friend is in her pajamas!” “So?” Ryohei tilted his head in confusion. “So you can’t see her like this! She can’t get married if you do!” Kyoko yelled and threw a stuffed animal at the door. Ryohei shouted back how extremely sorry he is and that he will not affect your chances of getting married, for sure, so not to worry about that. You buried your head in Kyoko’s chest and screamed quietly in embarrassment. After that fiasco, Kyoko made sure to lock the door the next time you come over. You leaned on the sink in her bathroom, brushing your teeth with the toothbrush that you both decided would stay at her house since you sleep over so often. Next to you stands your girlfriend, already dressed in her school uniform and brushing out her short, caramel hair. She caught your eye in the mirror and bumps you with her hip; you bump her right back. You rinsed out your mouth and gave Kyoko a minty kiss on the lips. “Sorry I kissed you with my gross morning breath,” you said and straightened out the bow around her neck, “and sorry for making out with you and, like, grinding on you when your brother came in.” Those caramel locks of hers flew as she shook her head passionately. “No! It’s not your fault that happened. And I had gross morning breath too, so we’re even.” She grinned and playfully unbuttons your pajama shirt again. You raised an eyebrow; was she really going to go through with this? Right now? Well, you wouldn’t complain anyway. It would be worth coming to school late. You were a senior already anyway, so the school wouldn’t give you too much grief about being tardy. A pile of clothes smacked against your face, waking you from your daydreams. Kyoko was already walking out of the bathroom, a teasing sway in her hips as she closed the door behind her, leaving you alone to get dressed for the day. You grinned. What a minx. “I’ll see you later, Ryohei. Thanks for letting me stay over!” You bowed slightly to Ryohei. Sure, you’ve known him for years, but you can at least be polite if he was going to nearly catch you making out with his dearly beloved little sister. “I hope you two have an extremely good day!” he shouted and waved enthusiastically. Around his waist was a frilly pink apron that read “KISS THE COOK”. The door shut with an audible click. Ever since he graduated, he’s been staying at home during the day, doing domestic house chores and exercising. At night he took college classes which allowed you and Kyoko enough time to finish homework and cuddle up in front of the television without interruptions. Also it gave you more time to kiss. “Come on, let’s get going!” Kyoko started walking quickly, leaving you behind. “We can’t be late for school! Tsu-kun is probably waiting!” “Oh, he’ll be late anyway, Kyo-chan, what’s the rush?” You pressed a quick kiss to her cheek and slapped her behind lightly, turning her laugh to a gasp. “Oh!” she whispered, scandalously glancing around to make sure no neighbors saw that. “Don’t do that! We’re in public!” Her cheeks were burning brightly. Contrary to her scolding tongue, a smile graced her lips. Just when you were about to kiss those smiling lips, the door behind you slammed open again and a certain white-haired brother tumbled out of it, shouting. “Hey! You two!” Kyoko whipped around with a look of shock painted on her face. Ryohei held up two pretty boxes. “You forgot your lunches!” Ryohei shoved a bento into your arms and reeled a bit when he saw Kyoko’s face. With scrunched brows, he placed a hand over Kyoko’s forehead. “Sis, are you feeling alright? You’re pretty warm. You’re not…” he gasped, “extremely sick, are you?” “Aah, no, I’m...I’m fine,” Kyoko assured him. You smile faintly at her. Wind buffeted your hair and Kyoko reached down to make sure her skirt didn’t lift in the breeze. Another beautiful day in Namimori. If it wasn’t for school, you probably would be taking a walk in a park with Kyoko, or maybe even a trip to the zoo. She really loved watching the otters swim around. “Hey...Kyoko?” “Hmm?” “Do you not want people to know we’re dating?” Kyoko slowed her walking until she stood still. Her soft hair covered her eyes so you couldn’t judge her expression very well but her demeanor was frozen. “No,” she said, “it’s not that… It’s…” Kyoko trailed off and let her sentence be carried off by the wind. You slowly made your way to where she stood on the road and slid an arm around her neck, dropping your bag to the ground. “Hey,” you touch your forehead to hers, startling Kyoko so her eyes drifted up to yours. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. Don’t feel pressured or anything… If you’re not ready to tell everyone just yet, I can wait. I’ll wait forever if it’s for you, Kyo-chan,” you bumped your nose with hers and she giggled quietly. “I just want everyone to know that you’re mine~” She laughed again, “Don’t be ridiculous!” and shook her head. “There’s nobody that wants to steal me away from you, silly!” The two of you decided that it was time to start walking to school again. “Of course people want to date you! You’re cute, sweet, and really smart! Don’t you know you’re, like, the prettiest girl in school?!” You gawked at Kyoko’s humbleness, but what she was saying just wasn’t true! “Haven’t you seen how Tsuna looks at you?!” “Tsu-kun?” Kyoko put a finger to her chin in thought. “Hmm… No, I think you’re just imagining things!” You squinted at Kyoko’s inability to see how blatant Tsuna’s love for her was. Kyoko took your hand in hers and when you glanced over at her her face was beet-red. You smiled and started to swing your hands together. “Thank you…” she said. “For what?” “Just thanks…” You laughed. She could be so strange sometimes! “Hey!” A thin voice called out. When you turned around, you were greeted by the sight of Tsuna, Yamamoto, and Hayato jogging towards you and Kyoko. You felt her grip loosen until she let go of your hand completely. You didn’t realize how cold your hands were until you weren’t holding hers. “Hi, guys!” Kyoko chirped, voice as chipper as ever. They all responded with a greeting of their own and it didn’t take long for bickering between the boys to begin, and it took even less time for Tsuna to begin getting chatty with Kyoko. You smiled. Poor boy didn’t know your girlfriend was a lesbian. You didn’t realize the fighting between Gokudera and Yamamoto had ended until Gokudera was very close to your side and already speaking. You didn’t catch a word of his sentence. “Sorry, what?” “I said, ‘You and Kyoko are pretty close, aren’t you?’” Green eyes slyly met your own. “I don’t have a single clue, Gokudera-kun.” Despite your denial, you couldn’t keep your mouth from splitting in a wide, toothy grin. Gokudera snorted at your terrible acting. The sounds of the rest of the group turned to background noise. “You and Kyoko are dating, aren’t you?” Gokudera had a smug grin of his own on his face. It took everything you had to not break out in laughter where you were and collapse to the ground in stitches. “What do I look like,” you began, “a person that would date super cute girls and love them with all my heart?” Gokudera seemed to choke a bit at that but when he collected himself he agreed vehemently. You sighed in relief when the lunch bell rang— finally, a break from your classes. The halls were busy with students rushing out to buy food and drinks from the vending machines on the school’s perimeter while your own little group rushed up to the roof to eat in peace. Opening the door, you were temporarily blinded by the sun and heard Gokudera swear somewhere behind you. Yamamoto laughed and was promptly told to shut his trap while Tsuna tried (fruitlessly) to disband the two’s bickering. As you sat down between Yamamoto and Tsuna, you didn’t realize Kyoko wasn’t with you until you had already began to eat the bento Ryohei had packed for the two of you. Surprisingly, his food was quite good. You’d expect it to be burnt, with how fiery Ryohei’s personality was and how easily he was distracted, but his cooking skills had vastly improved from how they were the year before. He’d get a wife easily if he kept up that work. You told the gang you’d go looking for Kyoko real quick and Tsuna nodded, asking if he should come as well. “No,” you replied, “I’ll be just fine.” You didn’t miss Gokudera’s raised eyebrow and had to bite your tongue hard to keep from snickering. “Kyo-chan?” You weaved your way in and out of climbing vines with nearly ripe fruit hanging off, begging to be stolen, and did your best to not dirty your shoes in the soft dirt underfoot. The gardening club had been granted a pretty little space behind the school to do their activities, since the sports clubs used the front of the school grounds. Almost no one except the gardening club came back here. Almost. A lot of couples, you and Kyoko included, would come to make out by the tomatoes and sunflowers; the gardens were a very romantic place for teenagers to get hot and heavy with their lovers. “Kyo-chan? Are you here?” You spotted a head of ginger hair crouched on the cool cement under the shade of an old tree that bordered the gardens. Poor Kyo-chan. “Honey?” Kyoko lifted her head at your call and her lips were pouty and red from gnawing on them. You felt your brow furrow and you came to sit next to her, bringing an arm around her neck to tuck the hair behind her ear and to draw her in closer to you. “Hey,” You whisper. Kyoko leaned into your reclined body, “what’s going on?” She sighed and buried her face in the crook of your neck. You prodded her tummy with wriggling fingers and felt her laugh. “Don’t tickle me!” “I’ll stop when you tell me what’s bothering you!” “You’re so silly!” Kyoko beamed. Then her cheeriness faded and she let her head rest on your shoulder again. “I…” she whispered, “I want to tell people about us…about me and you… But I don’t know what to say… What if they don’t like us?” “Hey.” “…” “Hey,” you grabbed her gently by the shoulder and made her face you. Holding her chin with your fingers and brushing stray strands of hair out of her eyes, you could see the watery sheen they held. “Kyo-chan… There’s nothing to be afraid of. You’re not ashamed of me… are you?” At your timid question, Kyoko reeled back like she had been electrocuted. “Of course I’m not ashamed of you!” she nearly yelled. Her eyes widened when she heard just how loud she was and she leaned in and said quietly, “I’ll never be ashamed of you… I just wish it wasn’t so hard to—” “—come out?” Kyoko laughed, voice tired, and hummed in agreement. Her hand creeped into yours and she softly squeezed your palm and played with your fingers. “Don’t worry, princess, you don’t have to do a thing if you don’t want to. It takes time, y’know? You can’t just decide to tell everyone you know something so personal in a day. It can take a long time… some people never do it. Just—” you coughed, not used to saying such emotionally-wrought things so early in the morning. Heck, at any time of day— Kyoko was always the one that was good with emotions in your relationship. “—just know that everyone loves you. If you’re worried about something changing with the guys, or with your family, don’t be. What’s this, the sixties? Everyone’s a little gay, Kyoko—” Kyoko burst out in a fit of uncontrollable laughter at your comment. “—okay, fine, not everyone, but a lot of people are! Including me and you~” you nuzzled your nose on Kyoko’s rosy cheeks and nipped her ear when she turned away from your ticklish affections. “I think you mean especially us- and not just a little bit, a lot!” Kyoko swished her finger in the air like he was making a point— and she was, a very, very valid one. She turned around and held your face firmly in her small hands as she planted lots of kisses over your face until you were in happy tears, begging her to stop and let you catch a breath! She rolled off you onto the ground, seemingly uncaring of the whiteness shirt or maybe she just forgot how dusty the concrete by the gardens were. “Baby, we should be heading back to the boys now, what do you think? You don’t want them to suspect anything, right? Actually,” you snorted in a way that Kyoko found cute (it was really wasn’t, though), “Gokudera already knows.” “What?” Kyoko gasped. “Yeah. I guess he knows from growing up with his sister. She’s so hot, I don’t doubt she had a lot of lovers, same gendered or not.” Rolling your eyes, you tried to imagine Bianchi with a woman. It was extremely easy to imagine her having a woman as a lover. You giggled, feeling like you had a secret that no one else knew. “Hey!” Kyoko whined, “Are you imagining other women? I’m right here!” Kyoko pouted. Just as you were going to apologize and explain to her what you found so funny when Kyoko surprised you yet again. “You don’t even have to imagine with me! Just do it!” And Kyoko kissed you hard on the mouth. With a little more teeth than you were used to, but Kyoko seemed to really enjoy taking charge recently. It was nice. She carded her hands through your hair and tilted your head back by your hair so she could get a better angle. You kissed her back with tenderness, content in having her in your arms. Kyoko had something else in mind, though. Crawling into your lap, her weight on you was also a bonus of her trying to pry a better kiss out of you. You lost yourself in the softness of her lips and the nip of her teeth when she changed the angle of her neck, and just the slightest hint of her smooth tongue skimming your bottom lip and— “K-Kyoko-chan?!” You pull away from Kyoko with tousled hair and swollen lips to see Tsuna standing— well, fallen, really, on the ground a few feet away from the two of you. Kyoko still perched on your lap, your mind drew a blank when you tried to think of an escape plan and an explanation, short of throwing Kyoko into the garden and pretending like nothing happened. Tsuna’s face was red as hot iron and he was probably as heated as it too as he stammered, “W-We were wondering if something happened to you two, s-since you were gone so long and Gokudera-kun said to go looking for you but… I-I can go, actually, right n-now—” “Wait!” Kyoko yelled, her face buried in your chest. You could feel an awkward bead of sweat rolling down the side of your neck… Why was she telling him to stay with her head shoved in your chest? Truly, it was a strange turn of events and Kyoko wasn’t making your situation look any more innocent… “I’m in love, Tsu-kun!” “E-Eh?” “That’s right!” Kyoko picked up your hands and held them tightly in hers, “I’m in love with a girl! I don’t care what you think either; we are absolutely perfect together and I love her very much! Our love is pure, organic, and beautiful!” Kyoko’s eyes burned with a passion you could only assume to be prevalent throughout the Sasagawa family as she announced her love for you to your dear friend. Your lip quivered and tears began to fog your vision. Happy they were, but you blinked hard to clear them. An event as important as this meant you couldn’t miss a single second of it. “Um,” Tsuna began, keeping his eyes level with Kyoko’s gaze even as his face burned, “That’s not a problem at all? I mean, I’m happy for both of you, but you didn’t have to hide it or anything… I’m just… surprised, that’s all.” Kyoko took a second to process that and during the awkward silence that followed, Tsuna shuffled his feet. Kyoko still hadn’t moved from your lap… Really, it was making this situation more trying than it needed to be… “C-Can I go now?” Tsuna sheepishly asked for permission. Kyoko nodded slowly and Tsuna practically sprinted away from the sight of his long-time crush making out with her best friend. You couldn’t blame him. The look on Kyoko’s face gave you a clear view to all the machinery working in her mind, every gear and cog rotating, still trying to understand what just happened. “Oh,” she finally said. “That was a little easier than I thought.” “You girls are such terrible actors,” Gokudera said with a cigarette hanging out the corner of his mouth, his hands upturned in a show of dramatic disappointment. “Really? I had no idea! I think you could make it to Hollywood! Haha, invite me to lots of award shows, I want to meet famous celebrities~” Yamamoto laughed and opposed Gokudera’s opinion. He smiled and went on about how he was just going to help a friend ask the both of you on a date. Good thing he didn’t, Yamamoto chimed. “Shut up, baseball freak,” grumbled Gokudera, already drained of Yamamoto’s presence in your friend group. “Whaaat? Ah, you’re so mean, Gokudera-kun!” Yamamoto teased and playfully hit Gokudera’s shoulder, resulting in another fight between the two opposites. Kyoko leaned into you as the five of you walked home, going through a nearby shopping mall to get a bite to eat first. Your arm was wrapped around her waist and pulling her in close. Both of your hips bumped with each step but it was only a mild annoyance—a trade off in exchange for being able to openly adore your girlfriend. “How do you like this?” “I love it,” Kyoko smiled and nuzzled into your neck, causing you to jump and smack her lightly with your schoolbag. A loud commotion sounded from a grocery store to your left. A young man in a white apron yelled into a crowd about the store’s outrageously cheap deals of the month and flocks of mothers held crumpled coupons in their waving fists. The air smelled like grilled meat and the small food stands outside the grocery store must have been making a fortune off of the hungry shoppers. Suddenly, a familiar turf top came into view, much more weary than he was this morning and carrying a ridiculous amount of brown paper bags, overflowing with his purchases. “Big brother!” Kyoko said in surprise. Ryohei made a similar greeting when he noticed how close you two were, and Kyoko took notice of it as well— she didn’t shy away but you could feel heat creeping up her neck. Ryohei’s eyes widened for a second before he broke out in a grin that reached his ears. “Aah, you’re finally together? I’m extremely happy for you!” Ryohei’s explosive personality returned and he beamed brightly, murmurs of agreement echoing faintly within your friend group as well. “E-eh?” Reeling back in confusion, Kyoko blinked and tilted her head, “You knew?” Of course Kyoko was shocked; she went through every precaution to make sure that her romantic relationship with her best friend was a secret! The bags in Ryohei’s arms crinkled as he shook his head at Kyoko’s naivety. “Do you think I really wouldn’t be able to tell when my precious baby sister was in love? I’m not that dull, Kyoko-chan!” he guffawed. Laughter bubbled up in your stomach, growing and growing until you were in peels of laughter, wiping happy tears from your eyes. The two of you never needed to hide anyway! While you were busy laughing until your stomach hurt, you didn’t notice that Kyoko had dropped her school bag until she spun you by the shoulders and kissed you. All of her fear melted away like ice and her overflowing joy infected you, breaking the kiss through your ecstatic giggles. Her pretty honey eyes were shining with mirthful tears and she rested her forehead on yours, smiling softly all the while she told you, “I love you.” Faintly, you heard the loud voice of a certain boxer who did a terrible job of hiding his fondness for the two of you yell, “Hey, you two should extremely get a room!”

[icharchivist]

With Lavi having a tragic fate (though that doesn't mean it'll be 100% depressing). I feel like when you compare Allen's story to Lavi's fears/own goals you can get the impression Allen is meant to be a role model to him. Most of the cast admires Allen, but Lavi always gets special focus it seems. Just like how Lavi's character development has probably been impacted the most by Allen. There's also the fact that Allen and Lavi are among the few who have a goal that's a mystery, hasn't been-

2 been achieved yet, many obstacles being presented in the way, tied heavily to the fate of humanity and both are/will struggle just how they want to accomplish their end goal when important figures (mentors) tell them otherwise. All we and they know about their goals are the basic. Allen: save humanity/akuma. Lavi: be Bookman. Other characters have goals too but none as complex or overreaching as their goals have been in the plot. Lenalee's is protect my world. Kanda's is find person then-

3 repay life debt to Allen. Pretty straightforward and personal. A lot of Lavi's fears have been addressed but not settled (except acknowledging he has a heart and will use it). His big fears have been not being good enough to be a bookman. Leaving behind people he cares about, having them judge him badly for it and having those closest to him die. Around the same time Allen was starting to feel stressed/misplaced in the Order. Lavi was getting secretly heartbroken over possibly leaving the -

4 Order and his friends behind. Now look at what's happened: Allen's been branded a traitor and is judged badly by most of the Order he risked his life for. All for following his beliefs. Allen left all his friendships behind to follow his sense of duty. Allen has already lost extremely important loved ones (Cross and Tim) and also thinks others close to him are dead (Link and Lavi). Been told by his mentor to give up his vow. Basically a lot of what Allen has gone through is what Lavi is most-

5 most afraid of happening to him. Allen told Cross in Nea's dream world that he would keep his vow until the end. Even if Nea takes him over completely then maybe Allen's determination will have inspired someone else (my ♡). That someone in particular might be Lavi. We don't know what the bookman purpose is. Only that it's tied to humanity's fate. It's possible Lavi will be forced to go through what no other Bookman has gone through before him. Since Allen is the Destroyer of Time it makes -

7 Lavi will most likely at least one of the ones to accompany Allen to the very end of his journey. It's what Bookman thought was the most important record to make and Lavi will have to succeed him in recording Allen. Afterall you could even see the 14th reveal as Bookman giving Lavi the responsibility of being Allen's main watcher (even Lavi seemed surprised Bookman wanted him to record Allen alone despite not having any idea about the 14th yet). All in all I feel like Lavi is definitely being-

8 set for a lot of suffering himself over his burdens. Allen is going to be his inspiration to keep moving forward (even leaving his friends behind) and define his own path while never swaying from his original goal. It just might be his ultimate test is watching Allen die for his vow (which I guess inside his mind world was the thing that broke him) but staying true to his own vow by recording history as it should. This being Allen's hope his death would at least inspire someone to not give -

9 up when they need it the most comes full circle. It'd be a neat sign of growth for Lavi to experience Allen's death. But instead of pretending he's fine or breaking down completely. Lavi would take courage and inspiration on how Allen lived and apply that to himself (of course I would be sad if Allen died. Would the fandom survive. I just don't know. =,(* )

Allen+ Lavi: Oh yeah another thing I forgot to mention. Both of them used to dislike humanity. Lavi because of all horrors he saw from all the wars. Allen because of how people abused him. The difference is that Lavi used his status as a way to feel above and better than humanity. Allen had nothing and still took inspiration from a kind dog and later Mana to latch onto any love no matter how bleak things were. To learn Allen chose love over hate even when he sees the akumas true selves was a -

2 big inspiration to care about people for Lavi. I guess before Allen, Lavi always assumed he had it worst and knew better. But then that became his first wake up call. Ecspecially when Allen used his pain to encourage others.

!!!!! oh boy. So one step at a time.

All of the development of the parallelism works perfectly. allen and Lavi had always had some elements of parallelisms and you’re completely right that those elements often served for Lavi to be inspired by Allen in a very distinct way.

Especially with now Allen’s situation now that we know Lavi’s storyline is coming.Like you say, just Allen’s situation as of now would cause a lot of burden for Lavi, and would the parallels continue, Lavi would have even more reasons to suffer. 

I honestly always thought Lavi’s “tragedy” would happen while fullifying his duty. I’ve always kinda thought Lavi will live on to see his friends die and be doomed to record their history, and I tend to believe that Allen might die in the end of the manga. Not that I want to though, ultimately i want Allen to survive, and there would be still way for Lavi to suffer from seeing Allen’s suffering. But it’s not something i’m excluding. If life or death is supposed to happen to the main four i’m really more inclined to believe Lavi will live and Allen will die. I just. Hope not.

(and no the fandom wouldn’t survive, or well, i would be crying for ever and never recover for certain)

That said, while Allen did indeed move forward to leave his friends behind, as his friends proved, they were ready to go out of lines and orders to support Allen. Part of Allen’s new journey is to finally accept the help he had been refusing the whole manga. And that’s a huge part of Allen’s character growth. We do focus a lot on his own determination and how it carries him forward but the story (and Hoshino by the by) often calls him out for being an hypocrite for taking everyone’s weight on his shoulders but never allowing anyone to help him.

The fact next chapter will be Allen finally opening up to Kanda in the purpose of allowing Kanda to help is huge. Allen may have given up everything but now he’s at a point whe’re he’s realizing that he cannot just pretend to handle everything alone and that his friends are here to back him up. 

If Allen’s determination is something inspiring to carry him forward, latest chapters had shown that he cannot do it on will alone. He had to cling to the thought of his friends and Johnny had to call him to ground him back in reality. Determination is all fine and good but it would all make it harder would Allen continue Alone. And I think that’s why the current arc is calling “A Search/A Call for Allen Walker” (the word used in Japanese can be used in both those terms, as a spiritual search and a calling, of people grabbing and looking for him). The Arc is about Calling Allen Back with the love of the people around him while he got lost to his own isolation. 

Even if Allen’s determination remains admirable even within the frame of the story, the story refuses the cynism of letting him deal with it completely alone. It is a flaw from Allen to keep pushing people away. And it’s why this arc is specifically about people “calling for him” to remind him that he’s not going through all of this alone and cannot expect to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders.

If parallelisms with Lavi continue i don’t think Lavi will therefore cut out everyone to carry on his goal, because Allen is the proof of finally letting people in after for ever to focus still on his own goal. That the plot had been Condemning Allen for doing exactly that. 

Hoshino had always said that what she wanted to explore within DGM was how she viewed Love. From the themes of compassions and understanding, as well as her calling Allen a hypocrite, I don’t see her go for something as cynical as Lavi sacrificing his bounds with others in order to move forward.

I believe Lavi’s tragedy would just work also by allowing the Story he lives to hurt him and to stop thinking he can live free of hurt as long as he doesn’t care. To quote wtnv “Are we living a life that is safe from harm? Of course not. We never are. But that’s not the right question. The question is are we living a life that is worth the harm?”Lavi is convinced that if he doesn’t feel for people, there will be no harm coming from it. Therefore he’s taken aback and panicking when he realizes he’s getting harmed by it because he has never learnt how to handle it. Lavi’s journey would be imo to embrace that this harm is meant to happen. That he isn’t “living free of it” as long as he ignores those bounds. And that would be tragic enough for his own character arc.

I believe there are more growth possible for Lavi’s tragedy than doing just that, that pretending to live on too. 

So while i see what you propose as a possibility i truly believe that Allen isn’t a rolemodel for how much he is isolating himself for his goal, and would Lavi see it as such, he would only get more suffering from it. 

Besides if Allen is currently learning he cannot handle everything alone for ever now before seeing back Lavi, it might prepare Allen to handle Lavi in a similar crisis and manage to walk him out of it, with a side of “I’ve done the same, pushing people away thinking it’ll bring me closer to my goal, but it only caused more harm. Lavi, don’t do that to yourself either”. 

Allen had been Lavi’s inspiration to feel emotions again.  Not just in term of his goal, even if the parallelisms are there, but in term of profound emotions and compassion. And I doubt Lavi would overlook that in a character development arc.

and you are entierely right on the other parallelism about them hating humanity, but it’s also fuel on what i’m meaning too, of learning to let the emotions in and compassion toward humanity and others - and this compassion as Allen is learning, isn’t something that can only be one-sided, whenever he wants it or not, and that rejecting it when it comes to yourself isn’t healthy.

To me... Allen had always been about how much he pushed himself to help everything and everyone to the point of neglecting his issue until they started to blow up of proportion, and instead of reaching for help, Allen rushed out of it and isolated himself to not impose it on others, to not hurt them in the process. And Allen is currently learning that he should actually let people in, let people help him. And to me it’s one of the strongest message that plays off Allen’s greatest flaw of handling everything on his own.

I just can’t see this message go into deaf ears when it comes to others characters looking up to Allen.

Idk if it makes sense...? Hope it does.

Take care!