#engineering girlboss queen!!!!!

[klein-sodor-bahn]

Charlie, the fashion chameleon

My Girl Charlie in an epic silver dress inspired by Marlene Dietrich. She would be stealing the show but she only has eyes for her little Englishman.

[clementine-kesh]

listen to me. LISTEN to me. b’elanna is not a girlboss. just because she’s good at engineering doesn’t mean she’s not a flop girlfailure in every other aspect of her life. put her in a social situation and she’ll biff it immediately. she’s weird and off-putting. she’s the queen of untreated anxiety manifesting as anger and self-isolating behaviour. the fact that she’s best friends with harry (who is a heat-seeking missile for friendless weirdos) should tell you everything you need to know

[gaslightgatekeepgirlbosscombat]

Group H, Round 3, Poll 4:

Propaganda under the cut

Nadja of Antipaxos

Gaslights her fellow vampires when she knows she's wrong, gatekeeps info from familiar Guillermo, girlbosses by running her own doomed nightclub

She is the Girlboss, but also Girlloser of the show. Turned her own husband into a vampire (taking charge in a male-dominated field!) And further, in Season 3 she came out on top when her and Nandor were fighting over who would truly lead the Vampiric Council. Opened her own Vampire Nightclub! (Which she embezzled to death but shhh!) As for Gatekeep, she definitely gatekeeps both vampirism (Guillermo) and her friendship (The Guide). Does hypnosis count as Gaslight? I'm gonna count it in because she does hypnotize a lot of people. I could go on and on, but anyways Nadja is an icon and a queen and I love her.

Ianthe Tridentarius

She is trying so hard to be the main character by lying and manipulating her sister, her cavalier, her mentor, her ?love interests? (Spoiler???) And also god. Not sure how it's working out for her but she does love to lie and manipulate

Worstie Ianthe is the DEFINITION of gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss. She is one of a set of necromancer twins that are the heirs to their houses rule. Except wait, only she is a necromancer and she has spent their entire lives doing necromancy for the both of them. She is constantly mean to their cavalier, Naberius, who she occasionally nibbles on like a chew toy, before eventually killing and eating him to ascend to sainthood. She goes to gods spaceship with another woman who ascended to sainthood who she has a crush on, this other woman is like…. Both incredibly mentally unwell and also haunted by at least 211 ghosts. Ianthes method of flirting with her? Gaslighting her about the corpse that keeps moving around and hiding under her bed. For no real reason tbh. She is clearly plotting to overthrow god, and at the moment that consists of her manipulating him while he’s too sad about his long term partners betraying him and subsequently exploding to really care. She dresses in terrible outfits and makes soup by burning onions to the bottom of a pot, putting meat in and some vegetables and then it doesn’t taste like anything so she puts in a few teaspoons of salt so it tastes like a few teaspoons of salt. She had her crush amputate her arm and regrow her a new one out of bone and it’s one of the horniest things I’ve read in my life.

"Gaslight = told her lobotomized (she helped), schizophrenic girlobsession that there was no corpse under their bed, even tho there totally was. Gatekeep = girl did NOT share the secret to god-like ascension. She kept that shit to herself until it was time to eat her boytoy, and by then everyone knew already. Girlboss = she has a non-necromancer twin sister, and literally Everyone thinks they r both necromancers because Ianthe is so good at it. She reverse engineered ascending to the aforementioned ascension without even completing any of the supplementary tasks. She held her own in a fight against a 10k year old lyctor. She becomes the figurehead of her entire empire. "

She uses a man as a chewtoy in the first book, literally gaslights the protagonist of the second book about a corpse, and elder-abuses God when he gets depressed in the third book. Nobody is doing it like her.

Dives headfirst with no regrets while basically laughing and covered in blood into murdering her cavalier once she realizes what the gothic locked room mystery/competition leads to while everyone else is questioning it, helps perform lobotomy on harrow so she doesn't remember the person she loves, manipulates everyone to get to the top

idk just everything about her

her relationship with her sister is incredibly Bad, she fosters codependency and views Corona(the sister) as an extension of herself. This does not stop her from keeping up the con that Corona actually has magic (She doesn't, it was always just Ianthe) for 22ish years and every single person who interacts with them falls for it. She killed a man against his will (most dying for this purpose specifically go willingly) and she consumed him and she will be burning his soul for eternity. She's completely repulsive and still somehow incredibly hot.

she takes advantage of the fact that the main character is prone to hallucinations. at one point she gaslights the mc into believing that the corpse under her bed isn't real just because she can. she reverse engineered a set of very complex trials on her own without anyone realizing she had the skills to complete them normally. she's also babysat god through his drunk and pathetic era.

Artist: @starcanist

[babydollmarauders]

MEDIA MANAGEMENT — JACK HUGHES (23-24 SZN PART 11)

au masterlist

y/ndevils00

liked by jackhughes, nicohischier, and 251,869 others

y/ndevils00 well… that was painful

welcome back to my post-game recap! if you don’t know who i am because you’ve been living under a rock, or you’ve been in jail (don’t do crimes unless you can get away with them), i’m y/n! or as my boyfriend calls me, ‘dove’! i work as the social media manager for one of the sluttiest teams (and maybe the worst this season…) in the National Hockey League: the New Jersey Devils!

let get into it! your favorite (or maybe least favorite. i wouldn’t blame you!) men from hell lost 4-6 against the patriotic old guys tonight…. i can’t say i wasn’t surprised

we had an absolutely scoreless (and sinless) first period on our end, transitioning into intermission down by 3!

but second period is when we really started heating up! we got FOUR lovely goals by THREE lovely people!!

starting with uncle Toffee!! who scored our first AND our fourth goal!! he’s been so queen girlboss slay recently! who knew he would be this good?! not me! i doubted him severely! (i cannot apologize for my previous thoughts about you uncle, i can only ask you to forgive me anyways because you took my DILH and i’m still recovering)

Timo the absolute Tank Engine got us our second goal of the night with his first goal of the season! and no penalties!! i feel like a proud mother to a usually extremely horribly behaved little boy 🥹

and of course, my favorite whore, my very best swiss, my least favorite kind of cheese; captain slut got our third goal of the night!! THAT’S MY HOE!! POP OFF! (he also got a penalty tonight but i’ve opted not to show that because he paid me $20)

and i could never forget to mention that my beautiful angel of a bad bitch, Rowdy, got an assist on THREE out of four of our goals tonight!! he’s only 3 points away from 20 points already!! THAT’S MY (baby)GIRL!

and third period is when we immediately went as cool as the ice they skate on… giving up three goals (including an empty netter to the oldest looking man alive)… we got no goals of our own and my sweet baby angel face bestie number 1 got a penalty for being too perfect 😔

all-in-all, let’s wish the boys luck against the sabres on friday because apparently they need it! i think friday’s enemy gave them some pretty good advice though and they should put it to use!

p.s. ikea baby and merc-dog are my exact reactions to how badly we played in the third

p.p.s. ovi… when i catch you ovi 🥊😑

tagged john.marino97, tofff73, tmeier96, nicohischier, jackhughes, lhughes_06, jesperbratt, and dawson1417

Load more comments

jackhughes dove, baby, what is that abomination of a 5th photo?

y/ndevils00 my camera wouldn’t focus :(

jackhughes so why post it?

y/ndevils00 you don’t appreciate my talents

jackhughes i can assure you, i appreciate your talents plenty. photo taking is just usually not one of them

lhughes_06 gross

user29 did she just threaten OVECHKIN?! 😭

user17 i fear we may lose these updates after this threat 😪

jesperbratt what was i 😦 at?

y/ndevils00 i honestly couldn’t tell you— i was too busy wondering the best way to fit you in my pocket

john.marino97 i got a picture?!

y/ndevils00 you got an assist and no penalties!

john.marino97 but dawson got a penalty and no assists and still got a picture?

y/ndevils00 you’re not dawson, the standards for you are different

john.marino97 i’ve known you for 4 years and this is how i get treated? DAWSON HAS ONLY KNOWN YOU FOR 2!

y/ndevils00 you tattle on me, you deserve your treatment

dawson1417 she’s got you there, bud

tofff73 you doubted me?!

y/ndevils00 in my defense, i didn’t know you were chill like that

tofff73 jack has informed me that you cried at the trade, i forgive your doubts

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes YOU’RE TELLING HIM MY SECRETS?!

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 i wasn’t aware that you usually blast your “secrets” on your instagram story

user81 the random luke picture… y/n loves her smush 🥹

tmeier96 did you just call me a tank engine?

tmeier96 also, i’m OLDER than you!

y/ndevils00 that was a compliment! i’m saying you’re built!

tmeier96 you’re a funny little thing

y/ndevils00 also yes you are older— i said i FELT like a proud mother, not that i AM one. i already have one reckless child at home, i don’t want another

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 she’s a cat.

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes SHE IS OUR BABY

trevorzegras you love testing how far you can push before you get a warning for your behavior, don’t you?

y/ndevils00 i learned from you 🫶

trevorzegras you’re a cockroach

y/ndevils00 all i’m hearing is that i’m resilient and can live through anything

trevorzegras i hate you

y/ndevils00 you WISH you hated me— if you really did then you wouldn’t facetime me twice a week

nicohischier there are so many things i take issue with about my paragraph

y/ndevils00 is it that it’s not long enough? i’m sorry, i’ll make it longer next time!

nicohischier please DON’T.

lhughes_06 ya know, you were a lot nicer before i joined the team

y/ndevils00 oh good! that means i’m doing this right!

lhughes_06 doing what right?

y/ndevils00 tough love!

dawson1417 i didn’t do anything :(

y/ndevils00 i know, sugarplum!

dawson1417 they jailed me…

y/ndevils00 i can’t imagine how traumatic that must’ve been for you

dawson1417 oh it wasn’t that bad, you were in there too

y/ndevils00 yeah…. lindy put me there in 2nd intermission. he said if i wouldn’t stop chirping the capitals as though i was a player, then i needed to be treated like a player and get a penalty…. then i couldn’t get out because the game started again

dawson1417 you can’t skate, how did you get in?

y/ndevils00 i was betrayed

nicohischier @/y/ndevils00 i stand by it.

y/ndevils00 @/nicohischier YOU ALMOST DROPPED ME TWICE

nicohischier those were on purpose.

dawson1417 and how did you get out?

y/ndevils00 my knight in shining armor!

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 i didn’t get you out?

jesperbratt i did!

jackhughes oh, yeah, that makes sense

[stem-sister-scuffle]

STEM SISTER SCUFFLE: ROUND 1 MASHUP 8

Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy (DC/Batman) vs Princess Bonnibel Bubblegum (Adventure Time)

Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy is a Botanist!

Princess Bonnibel Bubblegum is a Bioenginner, Chemist and Roboticist!

Why you should vote for each contestant:

Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy:

"She wants to destroy humanity to save the planet and she looks good doing it."

"SHENSHDMD8SJS She's so strong and pretty and cool. Whadda woman..."

"stem icon. uses her knowledge to be fucked up and evil with a possible interest in plants. more #MadScience rep"

"Sometimes ya gotta go a little ecoterrorist to get your point across and that scares people. However she did it and continues to do it despite persecution from the DC heroes. as a legal disclaimer the statement about ecoterrorism above is a Joke"

"Takes no shit canonically sapphic ecoterrorist emotionally repressed queen what more could you want."

"Gay"

Princess Bonnibel Bubblegum:

"She’s a freak about it! she is committing horrors in there but just lowkey, and she’s having fun doing it which is what matters"

"She cares about her people to an absolute fault and all her evil science is for them (when it’s not simply for sciences sake) and that’s why she’s a girlboss <3"

"She’s unethical. She’s a mother. She’s a monster. She lives in a world of magic but only believes in science. She was even a lesbian. PB for the win!"

"she is a pink lesbian!! she has committed war crimes!! she is much more complex than the audience's (and the main character's) initial impression of her!! she created an entire kingdom that she rules and when she gets voted out she loses her sense of identity!! and loves her subjects and also spies on them!! she is trying not to be so mean!! she is passionate about her science work and she loves her girlfriend!!! SHE IS SO GREAT. her gf Marcy is actually my favorite but bonnibel's relationship with family and home is super compelling, everything from her abusive/controlling uncle who tried to force her into a het relationship to her (metaphorically) intellectually disabled younger brother who she loves so much because people get built different! we don't need to know why we just need to respect them! thank you. I love her"

"Organizes conferences for people to present their scientific findings, created life forms when she was lonely, has committed so many war crimes (including intergalatically) using tech she invented, lost an election because she assumed people would care more about facts than charisma (they did not), is gay. Spent a thousand years pining for her rockstar vampire ex-girlfriend. 💕💞💕"

"She has a RAT named SCIENCE. One time in the comics she also did a flip and kicked a door down while saying ""physics I swear to gob if you don't work now I swear physics I SWEAR"" she was literally threatening physics. Anyways physics worked good for her! She has built an entire kingdom from the ground up INCLUDING its life forms. She HATES wizards with a passion. Magic to her is just science with silly presentation. It's implied she's been to wizard prison a lot of times before. HOWEVER she also has a vampire half-demon girlfriend so yeah. Oh yeah she's gay too. "I have a disease that makes me like vampires and titties its called being a fucking genius""

"She is the best woman in STEM because she LITERALLY created and genetically engineered the people of her kingdom, built incredible robot guardians to fight off intruders, and continues to experiment (including an experiment gone wrong where she was trying to resurrect dead citizens) in spite of being a busy princess (and lowkey dictator) ruling her kingdom solo. She created/built her own family (aside from her brother), and eliminated them when they tried to rule over her and stop her from being an independent scientist. She is multitalented, hardworking, and just unethical enough to keep things fun and entertaining! She has no ethics board, so the experiments get wild! She is so Blorbo, you know? Also people don't acknowledge her science stuff enough, I want her to get more recognition as the insane, wonderful mad scientist she is."

"She’s an unethical mad scientist who experiments on her subjects. What’s not to love"

"Invents gadgets/devices and even created her own citizens"

"For the realness of working in the lab endlessly without sleep (Ignore that she set up a police state I guess)"

"Literally built an entire kingdom citizen by citizen"

"She bioengineered an entire country . Kinda fucked up, but that's okay"

[descendantofthesparrow]

Brutally honest thoughts on each character?

...*Each* character???? bruh thats so many, okay ill keep this short cuz im waiting for a haircut rn

well start with the vks cuz thats easy

Mal-started off strong and then just became...THE WORST, love hate relationship for her. shes my art block fix but also i hate her

Jay-i dont have strong opinions on him, he actually never stuck out to me other than 'obligatory jock dude of the friend group.' i wish i liked him more but im more attached to his fandom self over canon Jay

Evie-got boring after D1, i wish they let her keep her chemistry stuff, love her vibe but shes kinda boring to me. SHOULD'VE BEEN THE MC OVER MAL!!

Carlos- lots of lost potential with his tech stuff from the first book and movie. easily could've been an engineer or inventor but they just made him an animal lover and i got bored of that real quick.

Uma-my queen, my idol, can do no wrong i love her so much i WILL kill for her.

Harry-i love his dumbass so much YALL DONY EVEN KNOW I WANNA BITE HIM SO BAD

Gil-one of the few characters i felt actually...grew up? idk but hes one of the few characters were it actually feels like time passed for.

Dizzy-oooooooh honey, honey honey, sunshine baby, please, put the glue gun down.

Celia- they should've gone with her trailer persona. Her outfits are so bad and i wish she got better writing and designs, so much lost potential, also she should've been Jays pick.

Smee twins- why the fuck are they even here they had one line and no significance. also they should've had a Harry scene.

Aks

Ben-puppy boy, deserved to have doberman energy. got turned into a doormat by the writers and is unfairly hated.

Audrey-bitch queen, shes not a nice person and thats okay~ girlboss.

Chad- should've been the D3 villan they had that all set up in D2 with his weird ass attitude over Ben getting kidnapped on the isle.

Doug -....honestly gives me the ick, especially in D3, i HATE the long hair his actor had/has. gold is NOT his color and neither is pastel purple or green. he looked good in D1 but ICK for 2 and 3.

Jane- bby gurl, blue bird sweetheart. yeah she did some fucked up shit in D1 but she was an insecure 14 year old girl who got manipulated by Mal and other aks!!!

Lonnie- deserved so much better, shes Chinese why is she getting Japanese style stuff?!?! her plot in D2 didnt even do anything it just happened and no one cared and Jay just shoved his problems of girls playing roar onto her.

Beast- *inhale* i wanna kick his ass, and i could, lemme at him. how dare he force an entire kingdom on Ben at 16 when he didnt become king when he was 28(when he married Belle)

Belle- they took away her backbone, shes not Disney princess book worm and independent Belle. she just, lost the spark

FG- they turned her into a preschool teacher, GIVE ME MY OL COOKY FAIRY LADY BACK

Leah- *seething rage*

vk parents

Maleficent- fuckin love her, shes such a manipulative bitch and feels like a gone crazy version of a Maleficent made for kids. def not the mistress of all Evil but i love her nonetheless

EQ- shouldve been the head villain, SHE WAS THE FIRST DISNEY VILLAIN CMON! def not the same character from the animated movie but shes dramatic and sassy and i adore her.

Jafar- haha funny characature~ i wish he was more menacing like he had been. Jafar is not one of my fav villains so descendants jafar didnt exactly translate for me well.

Cruella- yeah they nailed her, no complaints about her. good design, good dialogue, good acting.

Hades- LEMME KICK HIS DEAD BEAT ASS, fucking 'daddy issues made you stronger' my butt. i hate his hair and honestly he doesnt fit the washed up punk design, he didnt deserve the speech at the end and didnt deserve to be forgiven by Mal.

Ursula- we only saw her tentacle and one line but she seemed spot on so yeah

Lady Tremaine- why the fuck was she nice in D3??? bitch is the EVIL stepmother.

Smee- spot on, i have words for his sons designs becuaee hes old not naturally white haired but hes chill, makes sense hed be a good parent, he never felt evil to me, just compliant

Facilier- such a vibe, his actor got him spot on, would've changed up his suit design but hes chill and i can see him being a family man(ignoring wicked world).

[resident-gay-bitch]

kinda a niche au concept but i think a lot of people will get it but also it’s so random lol: corroded coffin friendship / steddie / buckingham / more lol

okay, my dad watches car shows all the time like the car sos shit, and i don’t really like them, but i’ve always enjoyed one: Counting Cars. the main mechanic is like a metalhead and they’re all kinda punky and alternative and just a bunch of metalhead dads pimping out old cars and shit.

henceforth, the au idea: how are you seeing how our beloved eddie might fit into this?

SO say CC got big enough to be known kinda western globally or whatever, maybe bigger idk i don’t care but anyway. maybe they were a one hit wonder in the 80/90’s or whatever.

but they stopped playing because they all kinda wanted to settle down and stop partying and wanted to buy houses and not have to tour all the time or whatever right. say gareth met a girl and got married to her and they had a kid on the way, jeff and grant wanted to settle down and live a cosy steady life together, eddie was just so fucking tired of being front man idol or whatver. and they all just wanted to get back into the mechanic shop - maybe they all apprenticed at thatcher tyers or whatever in hawkins when they were younger.

whatever the reason, they’re ex-famous band who are pretty ficking rich and love working on cars and shit. so they open a shop and start fixing up cars. they get a lot of rapport because of their name; the shops called corroded cars or something similar to the band name. eddie runs the place because it’s mostly his passion and he impulse bought the shop himself whilst drunk one night and then they were all just like okay yeah let’s do this lol.

maybe one night they’re all chilling at gareth’s place for “family” dinner and after dinner they’re just watching telly and a car show comes on and then they get the idea to start a show!!! so they do!!!

eddie’s the main guy, obviously. he’s always been the drama queen confident one so he runs it all, and it’s His shop anyway. eddie is the idiotic, loveable, idiot but he’s also just a cool down to earth alternative guy who headbangs whilst working on engines and REFUSES to cut his hair.

i think jeff would be the head painter, graphic artist,. i feel such an arty vibe from him ya know? i think that would be his area of expertise. the audience would love his general calm vibe but also adore how easily he puts everyone in their place in a second and is so secretly sassy.

i think argyle would be the airbrush guy and also works in paint / design. he’s Definitely not always high and is just funny like that… definitely. his niche opinions and random curiosities keep the audience captivated.

gareth would be the detailer i think. he’s got a sort of perfectionist vibe and he’d always have a go when eddie brings in a car or a bike he’s just been fixing the motor of or whatever and there’s grease stains all over the doors and shit. the audience would love their banter.

grant would be the bike shop manager, he’s got a strong interest in motorbikes and that’s his area of expertise. he’ll spend hours perfecting one part of the body of a bike and eddie adores his dedication every fuckinf time.

jonothan would be the tech guy. he finds ways to update old cars to help them run smoothly whilst feeling authentic in the drive. some of the tech he pulls out is next level and everyone in the shop will spend an entire episode gushing about this one feature in a car he added that makes it feel like a spy car or something.

Nancy!! she’d be the behind the scenes manager. eddie hired her about one month into the buisiness when he realised none of the CC guys could / or wanted to do the books and shit. she’s smart as hell and a total hard ass when it comes to their aloof attitude and carelessness, but she’s also good fun and a total girlboss. eddie relies on her to keep the shop afloat, he’d be lost without her. she’s a fan favorite because she’s the only one who can attempt to put eddie in his place and acctually succeed. anyone goes and tells eddie he needs to think about the budget before he goes spending, he won’t even listen, she gives him one look and tells him no and suddenly he’s sheepish and nodding and walking away like a child who was told they can’t have a cookie. she’s in charge of all the books / finance / accounts / all that stuff!

(also, people are having a hard time figuring out if she’s dating john or argyle, or weather those guys are dating eachotjer, or if they’re all dating, or if None of them are dating)

Chrissy!! she’s adorable. a total fan favorite. she’s their receptionist and is currently taking an engineering course part time in college, finally taking the initiative to do something She actually wants to do. her sweet demeanour pulls customers and watchers in, and her determined attitude is what makes them stay. she’s like pure sugar, but so insanely smart. sometimes she’ll come and watch everyone as they work and if it’s not busy they’ll teach her different things and let her try. everyone loves the episodes where chrissy gets to try and fix things or paint things or learn things!

ROBIN!!! my girl! ugh! she’s TOTALLY an iconic mean lesbian okay. she’s always got banter with the guys, and she’s so cool calm and clllected, insulting them all the time. the girls in the audience go crazy when she’s onscreen in just a wife beater tank and got them gay girl muscles out! she works close with eddie on motors and shit but she’s also the project scout. she looks for new things for them to try and brings these ideas / cars / bikes / whatever else over to eddie to get out into the show! but the audience loves her even more when they see her totally awkward dorky side come out the first episode where chrissy comes over and watches robin work. they’ve never seen robin drop a spanner so much! chrissy is the only one who can fluster robin like that. the audience is rooting for their romance.

and the steddie! so robins totally uber rich best friend likes collecting old cars. and she’s been trying to get him on the show for a while because he has Such cool cars but he’s never needed fixing or pimping. until he goes and buys another one and it just won’t run and it’s all beaten down but he just HAD to buy it because it was his dream car as a little kid or something. so he comes on the show with his car and - well, the main reason he’s been avoiding it because he actually used to crush on lead guitarist and vocalist eddie munson back in the 90’s - eddie obviously being the face of the show greets him with nancy and robin and they talk about his car and eddie gets Flustered!

robin has a totally hot best friend whos So ficking queer And knows heaps about cars and is standing so close, shoulders touching with eddie as he shows pictures of his collection on his phone and eddie pretends he’s looking at the cars and not steve’s ring adorned hands.

steve is also highly protective of his cars and so he hangs around whilst they work on his ride. he and robin are so chatty and bitchy together and the audience love it. and eddie can’t stop Staring!!

by episode three of steve being featured in it people are posting shit trying to notify steve and robin that eddie is so gay for steve!

and then steve’s car is done and done and then he leaves the show. and then a couple of episodes later robin approaches eddie and whispers - but the cameras are right there - to eddie asking if he has been perving on her best friend and it’s So funny to everyone cause eddie’s kinda terrified and she’s threading to burry him alive if he hurts her steve and- eddie goes red when he realises that robin just confirmed he had a chance with steve.

anyway. suddenly steve has Many more appearances on the show :)

and obviously robin and chrissy get together!!’

and no one ever finds out about the love triangle between nancy jon and argyle (they’re all polly)

anyway. i just think that’s cute.

[taylor-titmouse]

Just wanted to say that I haven't been able to stop thinking about The Long Road since I read it. I've loved everything you've written but to me this is unquestionably the best to date. I was going to say I loved how you wove the characters' explorations of gender and beauty standards and class so seamlessly into the story, but I realized as I was typing that that's not even what you did. It's "seamless" because it IS the story; the sex scenes emerge from and are contextualized by these fascinating fantasy norms that the characters find themselves in tension with. It's so cohesive, so confident that it's not going to lose you because this stuff IS interesting and ISN'T just an exposition dump. It kicks ass.

I was both surprised and absolutely delighted by how Tourmaline became my favorite character. I love how her being the brattiest jewel alive (affectionate) is what ultimately makes her heroically rescue Angre. The narrative doesn't need her to become a better person; it only needs her to decide that she's done trying to persuade Angre to give her what she wants and that she will take what she wants herself, actually, As Is Her Birthright. I'm sure I would hate to know her in real life but I loved watching her seize control of her own narrative here. I hope she never girlbosses too close to the sun; I want her to stay winning forever.

And Angre!!! I know you mentioned he gave you a lot of trouble in this story so I want to emphasize how much I love how he turned out. King of self-denial. So good at it he utterly fooled both Tourmaline AND himself. And I liked the portrayal of him as a social engineer - I think in a lot of ways, that IS a more useful asset to have in a bodyguard than mere strength; it's just his bad luck that this was a story where it didn't benefit him much. I know you've mentioned that you don't have further stories in mind for him or Tourmaline right now, but I'd be curious to see how Angre changes after his epiphany at the end of the story. And regardless, I desperately hope for references to Bandit Queen Tourmaline and her loyal knight in future stories the way Gresham, Gundrid, and Eveline were referenced in this one.

I could keep going on but this is already an awful lot, so I'll stop here. Thanks so much for this one, and thanks to R/L Monroe for editing, too.

yes!! yes!! tourmaline!!! i'm so pleased with how she turned out in this final draft, because she doesn't NEED to learn anything! there is no lesson for her because she never did anything wrong, even if she's annoying as a person. it's everyone around her who has to shape up.

it's the conditions that need to improve etc etc. we love her

[lemonhemlock]

I truly hate how many people say that Hotd made Aegon complex, because this is far from the truth. I really miss the old days when i was able to argue for the greens in f&b without having Aegon rapist, joffery 2.0, rapist king etc thrown at my face. The worst thing I've ever heard anyone says about him at that time is that he is an asshole usurper who traumatized his nephew. Because nobody took Mushroom's fanfic about him as a fact. Now Hotd made one of the worst Targaryen rulers a girlboss lgbt ally lmaoo. And yes she was terrible and not just because "evil misgonystic historians" even her descendants refused to acknowledge her. Now unfortunately we're stuck with rapist vs girlboss fights for the upcoming few years.

the aspect that i find most hilarious about this is that, yes, not even rhaenyra's SONS acknowledge her as queen, which is so crazy when you stop to think about it. what does that even say about how her rule is perceived?

and she totally did conquer king's landing and rule aka she got her hands on the symbols of power aka she absolutely could have been counted as a monarch after egg, because she managed to win the throne by right of conquest, ousting the previous monarch. so the succession could very well have looked like viserys i -> aegon ii -> rhaenyra i -> aegon ii -> aegon iii

but our aegon basically yeeted rhaenyra from the history books out of spite and relegated her to the rank of princess, a decree which aegon iii upheld! astounding!

there was a post circulating around a few months ago arguing about how, while rhaenyra's line prevailed on the throne, supposedly the greens' legal argument won out in the end, aka women are not allowed to rule, but i take issue with that line of reasoning.

archmaester gyldayn certainly favours that interpretation, but people really take his auctorial voice for fact even when what he puts forth are not facts (like say, dates or events) but his own opinions. gyldayn is an unreliable narrator himself, but people tend to overlook this - the book is NOT written with grrm's narrator voice, but with gyldayn's!

so when gyldayns says stuff like how the great council of 101 "established an iron precedent on matters of succession: regardless of seniority, the Iron Throne of Westeros could not pass to a woman, nor through a woman to her male descendants", i call that bullshit, bc it is very clearly his own interpretation of the event. and another person may very well put forth a different legal interpretation based on the same event/precedent/ruling, just like lawyers do in courts all day every day. "in the eyes of many" - what many? where? who are these people? where is the research? does westeros have this great legal body / high court that is tasked with interpreting the law?

to me, this reads very iffy, because you know that, had viserys called another great council after aemma died and made the westerosi lords choose between rhaenyra and daemon as heir, they would have chosen rhaenyra, as daemon was very unpopular. so what would have happened to the "iron precedent" of 101 then? when you have two great councils with decisions that contradict each other? if i were a westerosi lawyer, i'd argue that such elective bodies represent a one-off event in which the lords choose their preferred candidate, regardless of other laws or precedents, precisely because the matter could not have been settled previously by resorting to these laws and precedents. so basically like a regular election.

in my view, the legal argument is way simpler. andal law = a son comes before a daughter, a daughter comes before an uncle. so viserys got to be king because jaehaerys engineered this one-off electoral event especially for him, so the law was not applied in his case. rhaenyra got to be heir while she was an only child, because a daughter comes before an uncle. and, after aegon was born, he became the rightful heir because a son comes before a daughter. the exclusion of jaehaera from the line of succession in favour of aegon iii is something i already talked about and took issue with. IMO grrm couldn't explain away the greens dropping jaehaera as heir (as it perfectly aligned with andal law), so he made sure to saddle her with impaired intellectual functioning, so as to have her excluded on the basis of her inability to perform her duties as sovereign (more in my jaehaera tag). again, people interpret this as the greens being sexist once again and preferring the male heir, but jaehaera couldn't have ruled if grrm made her "simple". come on, guys. why do you think he oh-so-conveniently included a mental disability for her and not for aegon iii. he needed her out of the way (god i h8 this plot point).

but, anyway, none of this matters when it comes to right of conquest, because that is an entirely different avenue for establishing legitimacy. once you denounce the legal (and supposedly peaceful) pathway and decide to settle the matter of succession via use of force, it doesn't make sense to apply legal arguments to rhaenyra's rule in KL. she was queen because she took the throne by force, but she did rule. don't get me wrong, you can go back-and-forth on this issue till the cows come home, but both sides could mount a substantial argument. the greens could say that rhaenyra's occupation of king's landing was illegal as she was a mere pretender and not the rightful heir, that it was thus abusive and her jurisdiction not recognised by the greens / aegon ii who took the throne back from her / the rest of westeros, whatever.* but you can definitely also argue the right-of-conquest angle for rhaenyra's queenship, it's just that no one cared to do so. the fact that everyone else hated it so much they nerfed her from the historiography is hilarious.

*ofc, there is a deeper and more complex discussion here on how legitimate any monarch is when their jurisdiction is not recognised by the entirety of the polity they claim to rule, but then we'd really be here all day

so what i'm trying to say is that aegon iii could have very well recognised his mother as ruling queen, he just decided not to. and, after that, viserys ii took one good look at his nieces daena/rhaena/elaena standing in front of him in the line of succession and agreed that it really was a good thing to leave his mother as a pretender in the pages of history because it made his seizure of the throne easier. then he got poisoned by his own son a year later, so that was it for his great plans as monarch.

wow this got way longer than i expected 🤦‍♀️

[jesawyer]

Potentially controversial question, though I don't mean it in that sort of way: One thing I noticed in Deadfire's writing was that there was a far greater likelihood for male characters to be portrayed as the more incompetent or less sympathetic half in most dynamics, whether it was debtor/debtee (Radora/Zamar), boss/subordinate (Furrante/Aeldys), enemies (Rinco/Mokeha) and so on. That's not to say misandry, since the goal is obviously equal representation, but I did notice this enough that I assumed wasn't just me seeing things or wanting to see them to justify a bias, especially also considering that if my observations were accurate, it wouldn't bother me in the slightest considering I would have chalked it down to an understandable difference in context regarding the way genders act based on historical norms and power dynamics (ie. There is possibly more historical weight in a man abusing a woman vs the reverse of that, so it is important to understand that history before portraying something that may or may not be a false equivalency). Essentially I ask this more as a curiosity than anything else: What was the writing team's approach to portraying gender dynamics in Deadfire?

I think the first thing is that we did make a conscious effort to numerically represent women as much as men among NPCs (note: there are not many non-binary characters in Deadfire, so in this answer I'll just be talking about male/female dynamics). We also put more women in authority positions where we felt it made sense in this fictional world that we created. For those who think that's bad, well okay.

That said, I don't really agree that the women consistently come across as more competent or sympathetic. In cases where they do, it's usually a difference of degree, not kind. I think a lot of the female characters are kind of shitty people and/or bad leaders, as many of the male characters are kind of shitty people and/or bad leaders.

If you prefer Aeldys to Furrante, that's understandable, but also Aeldys... sucks? Director Castol and Lueva Alvari are also both bad in different ways. Queen Onekaza II is a sympathetic figure but installed herself as a monarch over the other tribes of the Deadfire and has caused a lot of collateral damage to the Huana in her ongoing defense of the region - literally a gatekeeping girlboss. Prince Aruihi is a flawed character but I don't think he comes across as particularly incompetent or malicious compared to his sister.

Rinco is annoying and pathetic but Mokeha comes across as excessively belligerent even if she was in the right. Radora did get jumped by pirates, which is easy to sympathize with, but I don't think she does much to endear herself to the Watcher. Hazanui Karū is highly effective but she would be perfectly content seeing the RDC effectively steamroll Huana culture. Atsura is below her in rank, but he easily as competent as she is in different areas, but repellent for other, weirder reasons.

And as far as the companions go, Xoti is approaching Permanent Dark Mode, Maia assassinates people with no questions asked, Pallegina is a ultranationalist zealot... I don't know - I just don't think these characters feel "better" or more sympathetic than the male characters.

I think the main difference really is just that there are about as many female characters as male characters and they are more represented in key positions of power. But they often suck ass in those positions of power because they are difficult jobs and inherently corrupting. For better or worse, one of the recurring comments about Deadfire's factions is that they all seem kind of shitty. Even in cases where you can shift the faction head, they still feel a different type of shitty. That's both because of the vibes of the faction overall as well as their leadership. You do not, in fact, "gotta hand it" to the Royal Deadfire Company or Aeldys' nightmare anarcho pirate flotilla with the Ukaizo storm engines permanently set to Max Power.

[thisisnotthenerd]

i’m having exu calamity thoughts at midnight.

when the ring of brass meets at the ivy table in the palazzo por’co, it’s mentioned that this is the first replenishment for the ring of brass as a whole. when you consider the age differential of the pcs, this becomes way more interesting

patia was the first--’middle-aged’ for a member of a species that can live over 700 years is probably around 300-400. given patia’s general avalir native energy, i’m going to put her on at the younger side of things. avalir was raised from toramunda 292 years prior to the calamity--i don’t think she would be old enough to remember that. this is a woman who has lived her entire life on avalir, and given it to the city that birthed her. the memory erasure and removal of patia’s parents could have happened within the first 100 years or so of patia’s life, and any alignments with apogee solstices pin it to around her 50-60s. it’s still feasible for patia to have known the raven queen pre-ascension, though i’d put it at young adulthood more than childhood. there really isn’t a good way to give an exact estimate of her age as compared to a human lifespan given that she’s probably been the keeper of scrolls for the city for probably a good century, and the granddaughter of an archmage, the archmage who brought avalir to the skies. it tracks for her to be a member of the ring of silver from her position alone. she’s maintaining the city’s google archives, and setting records (ha!) while doing it.

patia’s theoretical age: 300ish

patia’s human lifespan equivalent: late 30s early 40s. feels older than her peers by a wide margin, for good reason. armed with knowledge, money, and her family’s good name, this kennedy equivalent can only go up from here.

laerryn’s listed age is around 100-150. this is a woman born in the sky with a brain that kept her city there. funnily enough, she could have been born around the last apogee solstice. i’m not saying it happened. i’m just saying that a woman who’s spent her life searching for a way beyond the stars, being born during a confluence of leylines, a major celestial event? maybe not a coincidence. when compared to patia, she’s so young. it’s crazy for her to be both the architect arcane and hierophant abjura. it is unbelievable to me that people could overlook her, but i guess that’s how she cultivated her work. hats off to aabria iyengar for making an extreme prodigy CON wizard who can square up with primordials and win. laerryn is doing an extreme amount of work maintaining the spell engines that keep that city afloat. I’m unsurprised that she gets mad enough to kill the speaker of the fourth, magister micah cormorant, in a single round of fireball and construct slam attacks.

laerryn’s theoretical age: 120ish for apogee solstice lineup. probably older--closer to 130-140.

laerryn’s human lifespan equivalent: around 25, maybe a little older. she’s an elf, but holy shit. this is someone who became an adult a few replenishments ago. she’s girlbossed her way into the heart of this city with a finesse that few can match.

it’s easy to think that for a while it’s just the two of them, but realistically, the ring of brass probably starts being a thing within the last two decades. laerryn would not have been old enough or important enough to rub shoulders with patia socially at least until adulthood. i’m imagining a young laerryn going to the librarium incantatum to find obscure references for her research often enough that they get introduced and strike up a mentorship/friendship.

loquatius is a little tricky. we know he’s around 150 as of exu:c, based on the average fey lifespan of around 300 and the fact that laerryn doesn’t know if he would be alive to see the next apogee solstice. we don’t know when he left the feywild to chase the truth in avalir. but the herald’s tome is well established, and so is he, as the herald of avalir, voice of the council, scribe of crowns. so either he came like 50 years ago and had the time to set it all up himself, or the herald’s tome was already an existing institution. i’m leaning towards the former--he seems like he would have started elsewhere, gotten frustrated, started his own publication, outcompeted everyone else, then turned into the exact thing he didn’t want to become. anyway. this puts him around middle-aged, like patia, so that’s where i’m going to put him. also this gives a nice window of time where he’s working his way up, and a way for him to get introduced to laerryn in a work context where both of them are revolutionaries in their fields.

loquatius’ theoretical age: 150ish.

loquatius’ human lifespan equivalent: late 30s early 40s. this doesn’t matter as much for him either--he’s fey, and wasn’t really operating on human standards anyway.

evandrin is even more difficult, given how much we just don’t know about him. he’s a half elf, so he’s running a little slower than the humans of the party, but not by much. i’d say he’s in his late teens/early 20s when he first meets laerryn, while she’s around 110. this gives them a good window of friendship pre-zerxus & ring of brass. if he was working his way up though the ranks, i could see them becoming friends while she’s working on a spell engine keyed to an alarm system for the chancellor’s guards in her capacity as hierophant abjura. or maybe the chancellor’s guards cause some destruction that she has to deal with as the architect arcane. this would put him at mid-late 20s when he has elias and meets zerxus in cathmoira, and mid-30s when he dies.

evandrin’s theoretical age: late 30s.

evandrin’s human lifespan equivalent: still late 30s as of the eve of the replenishment while he’s in the astral sea. not a huge difference, because half-elves basically just double a human lifespan, but mature at the same rate apparently.

zerxus is canonically 37, so i don’t need to put in any work to know that about him. zerxus, in his early adulthood, is on cathmoira doing some kind of paladin/oracle training that gets him to a level where he’s the runner-up to evandrin for the position of first knight when evandrin passes. maybe the position’s at least a little hereditary. something to think about later. doing a lot of work in terms of physical protection of the city--who needs an army when you’ve got a widowed paladin with a belt of storm giant strength? just let the guy get his grief out and enjoy having a principled first knight instead of fucking kevin.

zerxus’ theoretical age: early 20s when he meets evandrin and elias, ~30 when evandrin dies, and 37 at the eve of the calamity. no need for human lifespan equivalent.

nydas is around the same age, given that they grew up together in cathmoira. we know nydas goes off to be a pirate for a while before coming to the golden scythe and becoming the guildmaster--late teens through early 20s at the very least, and he’s commanding power and respect by the time he properly makes it to the skies. this tracks for when the nasty trifecta would start to meet, and sets a solid foundation for his role as the bank roll for the city of avalir. also someone doing a fuckton of work, but getting more credit for it.

nydas’ theoretical age: mid-late 20s when he gets to avalir and becomes the guildmaster, late 30s by the eve of the calamity. no need for human lifespan equivalent.

cerrit is the last of the bunch to turn up, and for good reason: he’s probably in his early 20s, no older than 25. eisfuura seem to exhibit a marginally different growth pattern than aarakocra--maya and kir are 7 and 5, but for human equivalency, like 14 and 10. a rough doubling makes sense, especially because they do say maya is 14 at one point. so, cerrit is probably like 20-25. rose up through the ranks of the eyes of avalir super quickly because of his keen sense and ability to catch things that others couldn’t. i think it tracks for him and wrayne to have gotten married a little earlier than laerryn and loquatius. also the fact that his lifespan is shorter just makes his absence from his family life more depressing. it’s less time, sure, but more to miss. also it’s very funny that maturity wise he could be older than everyone except for patia but chronologically closer to laerryn’s equivalent age. it’s so funny that laerryn is afraid of a bird that literally just showed up less than a decade ago. and then you see that the bird is terrifying in a fiercely competent kind of way.

also, i think this lends credence to the fact that cerrit has been a little separate from the friendship dynamic of the rest of the group: laerryn & patia are best friends, the seelies have romantic nonsense all the time, laerryn & evandrin were friends, which brought zerxus into the fold, and nydas had connections to both the trouble trio and zerxus. cerrit probably made a connection through patia, and immediately became a moral force. also this sets him up to join post-evandrin, making his friendship with zerxus all the more interesting. anyway.

cerrit’s theoretical age: early 20s--i’ll say 22 for now

cerrit’s human lifespan equivalent: early 40s. this man instantly became the handler for all of these people. my god.

anyway to be at that table is to simultaneously be an extremely overworked millennial and also maybe older than god and/or just old enough to graduate college. very fun and spicy age dynamics that could have been explored more, but i’m happy where they are, as you can see.

[favcharacterpoll]

ROUND 3 MATCH 25: REAGAN VS. MARINA

Reagan Ridley from Inside Job faces Marina Ida from Splatoon. Who do you like more?

Reagan Propaganda:

“she's a girlboss genius mad scientist that works for the conspiracy that secretly runs the world. She built a robot boyfriend because she was too afraid to date a real person. Her dad's a dick and her childhood was so messed up. She tries to do the right thing but does some fucked up things for her job. also I love her”

"im so evil they cancelled HER show it was no one elses only reagans shes my hateful little autistic queen"

Marina Propaganda:

"there should be Splatoon 3 DLC where she and pearl get married"

"She’s a DJ, engineer, pianist and vocalist!! Hee songs kick ass!! She builds her own stages for splatfest!! She can ride a motorcycle! She can draw!! She skipped multiple grades bc she’s so smart!! She heard a song so good she decided to escape from the oppressive underground Octarian society!! She helped Agent 8 escape the metro and save the world!! She’s all but stated to be in love with her costar!! And she’s gonna show up in the next DLC too!!

She’s one of the most interesting and lovely characters I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing about and I hope you can see just how cool she is too!!"

"marina makes kickass music and has cool outfits and has a womderful short wife and is tall also she draws shoujou manga about the people she knows and is so. argargargagrhargargghhhhh"

"MARINA MARINA MARINA THIS GIRL MADE WEAPONS OF WAR AND LOVES EXCAVATION EQUIPMENT VOTE MY LESBIAN MARINA"

"have you considered Marina has committed several war crimes and is also autistic and lesbian"

[lunarnoire]

work in progress aus

-black moon au where everything is nearly the same except black lady resembles naoko's concept art here (pg.28). chibiusa believes she looks like black lady from canon (same link as above but pg.42) but to everyone else she is still chibiusa but with much longer hair and she has the mark of the black moon clan on her forehead. (so think this art i reblogged a little while back.) also in this au, i'm gonna pull from the 90s anime where it concerns the 'kiss' between black lady and endymion - that it is an illusion created by wiseman to gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss (tm).

-also i discovered the sailor moon pc-engine game has nice lore for queen beryl and the shitennou and it takes place during sailor moon r and involves wiseman? past wiseman? i plan to use some of this lore from the anime over on @gaianoire but with the involvement of wiseman, i may use this knowledge about him on this blog depending on if i can use it.

-an gen. sailor moon au where black lady is the twin sister of chibiusa. i haven't worked everything for this out. it's still ??? in my mind but i have this to thank for it.

-a parallel sailor moon au like the above where black lady is chibiusa's twin which would mean usamamo had 3 daughters 👀👀👀 instead of two!

-and then i think i was thinking of an au because of this and then because of the amour eternal music where nehelania takes helios under her command after he sacrifices himself to save chibiusa, usagi, and mamoru? this would probably be an extension of my current dream arc au(s) in that helios/pegasus is under nehelania's command in a dark dream.

-oh! and then i was working on an au for the infinity arc !! maybe there's a daimon from the tau star system that would come to take over chibiusa's body? i was thinking probably around the time mistress 9 takes her hoste / silver crystal. maybe black lady would be one of mistress 9's, then by extension pharaoh 90's, loyal servants or her right hand.

[tomegnome]

🖤Monster Lover Book Recs🖤

Were you, like me, gaslit by booktok influencers into reading Ice Planet Barbarians? You may be entitled to financial compensation. Call 1-800-blue-peepee for more information. Not really BUT!!! Below is a list of passable monster fucker books I discovered after spite reading like 30 of these after being utterly disappointed by IPB and hellbent on find some that were at least OKAY. Better than Ice Planet Barbarians, at least

The genre being what it is, make sure to check on the content warnings linked on TheStoryGraph if there's anything specific you're worried about. Also there ARE some lgbtqa+ books on this list (you’re welcome).

🕸🕷️Ensnared by by Tiffany Roberts🕷️🕸 I read this so long ago, and I can barely remember it tbh. A big alien spider monster finds a human woman that has crashed landed onto his planet and is like: FUCK this mammoth spider queen hottie who wants me to be her king, I want this gangly little blonde thing I fished out of a dirty hole. Ok. Sure. Pros: This author is committed to the art of monster fucking. This is not just like a guy but furry. Or a guy but scales. This is a big ass spider fucking a lady. And that’s beautiful. Cons: You know that “born sexy yesterday” trope? Because of the communication/cultural differences it kind of felt like they were both each other’s sexy baby. I didn’t really care for the characters or plot tbh, I just persevered because I just had to see how those crazy kids made it work. I was like, “seriously what are the mechanics?” Turns out: webs!

🚀🐱Engineering Fate by Alexis B. Osborne🐱🚀 Sasha tumbles through a wormhole into a part of space uninhabited by humankind--and instead inhabited by sexy cat men (yay). This one starts with the “captured by aliens” trope à la Ice Planet Barbarians, but it’s not a weird, uncomfortable sex thing (yay). Pros: I loved how active the main character was compared to the protags of this genre. She murders soooo many people. I was cheering out loud. Kill those birdmen, girlboss. Cons: Did not really care about the ML or the smut at all. But if you are into breeder kink--or were one of those kids with a huge crush on Simba growing up--then you are in for a treat.  FYI, if you read this and like it, do not read the next in the series. It’s NOT good.

🦖🪐Heart's Prisoner by Olivia Riley🪐🦖Communication specialist studies dangerous--but totally hot--alien prisoner of war “Asset X”. Pros: campy action scenes which I always enjoy. A dinosaur wreaking havoc on a space station in my sex book? More likely than you think., but the ML was fun and sexy. No “soul mates” or “that’s the mother of my child” stuff as far as I can remember, which is always a plus. Cons: The FL has as much personality as an Austin’s sandwich cracker (fyi: that’s the worst kind of sandwich character). 

🐊🔮She Came From The Swamp by Darva Green🔮🐊 She was a girl, she was also a girl--but also a Ukrainian Swamp monster--Can I make it any more obvious? Let me tell you. It is already a challenge to find passable heterosexual monster smut. Sapphic monster smut? Oh my god. But this is cute and good! Pros: adorable leads, relatively simple story that focuses on what we’re all really here for. Cons: sometimes they did it while the swamp monster was in human form, and I was like. Why?

☢️💀Soul Eater by Lily Mayne💀☢️ Post-apocalyptic setting, but also there’s interdimensional portals that have appeared on all over Earth that aliens pour out of it. Aliens ranging from cute critters to blood thirsty monstrosities to shredded gay monster hotties. A supernatural monster dubbed “Soul Eater” slaughters a battlefield of men--leaving only a single soldier. What does the mysterious killer want with Danny? Pros: A bonkers plot with lots of action and violence? Check. A seemingly cold and scary love interest that is actually super soft and protective? Check. An author brave enough to actually write weird monster dick instead of just being like, “it’s big and blue!” Cons: having read a few books in this series the huge lack of meaningful female characters and non-white characters throughout is a bummer. 

[r6shippingdelivery]

10 CHARACTERS, 10 FANDOMS, 10 TAGS!

I was tagged by the amazing @simonxriley to list 10 of my favorite characters from 10 different fandoms, then tag 10 people. Thank you! 💜

Tagging @laminath @tauruscookie @bl-beater @krya-unv @clonedking @molotov-was-taken @sisterskaoi @jes-jones @glacialispictorem and anyone reading this, yes you 👀

Maxim "Kapkan" Basuda from Rainbow "Six" Siege - If I can pick only one for each fandom, it's gotta be him. I'm not remotely normal about him and that's okay

2. Atton Rand from Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic II - he was my first ever videogame crush

3. Anders from Dragon Age 2 - my problematic mage boyfriend who did nothing wrong

4. Egwene al'Vere from Wheel of Time - It was a close call with Lanfear, but I stanned Egwene since I read the books over a decade ago, and she slayed in the show too

5. Corvo Attano from Dishonored - honestly here I daudbted, you could say (yeah, I'm hilarious), but Corvo is in both games and in the end that's what tipped the scales

6. Sansa Stark from Game of Thrones - I know no queen except the Queen in the North whose name is Stark

7. Isaac Clarke from Dead Space - dilf engineer of my heart

8. Garrus Vakarian from Mass Effect - I know he loves calibrations more than me, but he made me question whether I'd be a monsterfucker/alienfucker

9. Crowley from Good Omens - honestly all of Pratchett's characters are great but I had to pick one

10. Chrisjen Avasarala from The Expanse - old lady girlboss? I stan

[beatrice-reden-official]

Ok so. Cave still sold shower curtains to the military and has a bunch of money from it, and Caroline is a mechanical engineer who no one thought much of because a) woman and b) she has a learning disorder but Cave was like "hell yeah queen let's fund you" (that's why she can't fire him)

Aperture started out with robots here, and its main purpose was to develop companions for humans. The companion cube is actually just a prototype for the cores they keep around because people love them, the cores themselves were actually made to be companions, not to regulate Chell. There is still human testing, but it's because Caroline wanted to start getting into cybernetic limbs and needed data on how the human body functions and also how the human brain functions. They don't really go bankrupt, but they do end up going into debt because someone ordered 70 million dollars of moon rocks.

They of course still have the portal gun, and now the conversion gel (there is no repulsion or propulsion gel because those just. Never happened) but yeah. Caroline tries to keep people away from the moon dust after she gets sick (around this time is when she gets Cave put into "Wheatley", he wasn't actually created to be an idiot in this au he just was sorta stupid then Cave made him. More stupid.) and dies. She had been developing Chell, and that was her pride and joy.

Oooooooo!!! I like that!!!! Of course Caroline is girlbossing and Cave has to mess everything up. Typical, but it is also so interesting!! I like the Companion Cube-Cores thing a lot