#even the conventions of communion

[f1ghtsoftly]

my boss and I were both raised catholic/went to catholic schools and her in laws have a tradcath son and I really appreciate that we bully him at every opportunity, what a freak.

[transmalewife]

so back in my overanalizing pretentious fuck days I vaguely remember wanting to write a meta about the madonna whore complex in star wars costume. and while I still think theres a lot to work with there,

(like, a lot)

I'm just gonna focus on padme right now, specifically Padme's hair because something really interesting just hit me.

look at this for a moment

this is the most virginal imagery imaginable.

let's get the obvious out of the way and say the blue dress and shawl are almost on the nose references to the virgin mary (maybe a hint at luke being the real chosen one?). But more importantly, in so many cultures around the world, loose long hair, especially combined with flowers, is associated with young girls. there are countless traditions that dictate that women, once they get married or come of age, should wear their hair up, covered or short.

(this might be a good moment to disclaimer that I am very transgendered and irreligious and none of this analysis is coming from a tradwife mindset. it's coming from a 'this is the archetypes that exist in our culture being very clearly and skillfully referenced here')

her dress is made to look like flowing water, carrying flowers. in slavic cultures, on the summer solstice, young women would make flower crowns and throw them into rivers, so potential suitors could fish them out downstream and court them. They would also wear flowers in their hair on their wedding day, and after that, they would cover it with a kerchief. and those traditions still live on in some form in europe today. most girls in my class got their hair cut short after first communion. women still throw bouquets on their wedding day.

There are in universe explanations I could invent here, from the easy 'this is just naboo funeral tradition' to the political "they wanted to distance her from the secret marriage to spare her family the shame of the scandal" but i'm frankly not about all that. and now that i've noticed this, I can't ignore it. all throughout rots padme is shown with her hair down (partialy. will come back to that), and wearing long gowns and hoods. The virgin mary imagery remains in the cut of the velvet hooded gown, in the blue drape of her nightgown when she cries on the balcony, and the, also baby blue, nightgown she wears when anakin has his nightmare literally looks like 1950s sexy lingerie.

(Also, a note here that I'm not willing to let spiral into a tangent, is that she almost always, and iirc, only, wears blue when she's either on tatooine, or when it's just her and Anakin. And then in her coffin.)

We know, from lucas, from the costume designer and art director, of two costumes that were purposely designed to make her look sexy, romantic, seductive. The corset in the fireplace scene and the iconic lake house balcony dress.

That makes sense. Those are the scenes where she's falling in love with Anakin, but the corset is extremely restrictive both visually, (and physically, according to natalie portman.) She's wearing metal bands around her head, the scarf looks like a noose and prison bars at the same time, and her hair is pinned up tighter and closer that in any other costume (except maybe on mustafar). She's not allowed the freedom to live in the fantasy of their forbidden love. She's imprisoned in the conventions of her station, quite literally trapped by her clothing.

And while the lake dress does look very free and loose and open, which is what she's tying to let herself be, flirty even, her hair is still quite literally behind bars, (and that type of headwear repeats in many of her costumes) as are her neck and arms.

Worth mentioning that in the floral picnic dress, her hair, while the shape is quite obviously meant to reference Leia's buns, is still held neatly in place by hairnets. This isn't the typical imagery of a young woman enjoying her freedom, frolicking in fields of flowers for the last time before she puts her hair up and grows up.

Padme didn't get to grow up, because she was never a child. In tpm her costumes are heavy, royal, extravagant. they not only hide her hair, but her face and body as well. Because she doesn't really matter. The costume, the crown, her duty matters more than the child underneath. There's quite literally six more of her. (Leia goes through something similar, in that she only ever gets to let her hair down after a battle is won)

Thinking of the costumes in tcw for too long makes my blood boil so i won't linger too long, but the moment Padme takes off her wig to reveal long flowing hair underneath, implying that the short bob she wore for much of the show is also a wig, is incredibly important here. This is a girl who finally got one thing for herself. She got her summer fling turned secret marriage, the first thing in her life that isn't controlled by appearances. and the mask is starting to slip. she wants the freedom, she wants the dreamlike lakeside romance back. she's wearing a middle aged mom wig over her childish waist long curls.

The traditional, deeply ingrained in so many cultures in the world narrative of young girl with flowers in her loose hair, then braids, then cut short and/or covered with a scarf is entirely flipped here. We're introduced to her when she's barely a teenager, but already wearing the elaborate, heavy headgear of a medieval queen. Even when she's "undercover" as a handmaiden on Tatooine, her hair is up in tight, elaborate braids.

There are a lot of obvious east asian influences in her royal costumes, bordering on appropriation in some cases (like, frankly, the entirety of star wars) which I would not feel comfortable ignoring, but don't have nearly enough knowledge about them to properly explore their meaning and symbolism.

In aotc, she's 24, she's no longer a queen, but even when she's trying to act and look young, her hair is still pinned tightly up. Her gowns on coruscant are still elaborate and restrictive, but we start seeing her in more intimate situations, at home on Naboo, by the lake. (And she spends a good chunk of the last two movies in her pajamas)

I had originally written "she can quite literally only let her hair down around anakin" here, but on second thought, no. Not really. In the scenes I was thinking of, the scenes she's in a nightgown, her hair is loose and long, yes, but always in a half up half down situation. Even in her simplest nightgown, in the first ever pajama scene, the one in her apartment in aotc, a basic white chemise, without any of the capes and tiaras and lace we see on her other sleepwear, her hair is still pinned up.

She's at her most vulnerable, sleeping, literally acting as bait for an assasin, without any of her senatorial regalia to protect her, but her hair remains controled. (I could say something here about that being the scene where Anakin barges into her bed waving his lightsaber, but lets just keep things tasteful and move on.)

In rots is where we first see her hair actually loose for the first time, though it's still covered by the hood of the velvet gown. Her costumes become simpler, less decorative, to create a cohesive image with the entire galaxy becoming more drab and colorless as the war goes on, heading towards the fully grey hellscape of the original trilogy. And we see padme specifically in more intimate, personal situations, most of her screentime is at her home. She's growing up into her housewife role, but for her that means freedom. For her that means letting her hair down and sinking into the fantasy of running away to Naboo with Anakin and raising their 2.5 kids. But the first, and only time we truly see her with her hair fully loose and uncovered, is at her funeral.

another thing unworthy of a whole tangent here, is that corde dies with her hair falling apart, out of her updo. All the senatorial power that the costumes and the headdresses afford dissolves in death.

I could note here also that this is a weird way to emphasize the tragedy of a 27 year old woman dying in childbirth by associating her with youth. this is tragic regardless. the tragedy here is she never got to have that stage of her life. she never got to grow up, to be a mother. She remains, in anakin's memories, the 14 year old angel, the 24 year old rolling in the grass like a teenager, or rushing alongside him into battle without fear, and the wife in her sexy nightie waiting for him to come back from the war. In the galaxy's eyes however, she will always have been the strong queen, and the tragic martyr, taken before her time. Not a child soldier and a woman who died because she broke the rules and dared to fall in love.

Padme never gets the freedom of childhood. She only gets to let her hair down in death. Did she want it? Is it Naboo releasing her from her responsibility posthumously, or is is another denial of her freedom. She was a ruler when she should have been a girl, and she dies a child when she was ready to grow up.

[reignsupreme-inyourdreams]

Is Jonathan turning into a vampire?

I saw someone say that Jonathan's reactions to Dracula in the Piccadilly confrontation make him seem less human, and that has gotten me thinking about the 'Jonathan is turning into a vampire like Mina' theory I've seen others discuss.

Now, I have to pay attention to Dracula Daily/ Re: Dracula going forward because my husband has my copy of the book so I can't dig around for evidence later in the book right now, but here is what I have noticed from entries in the timeline thus far:

Personally, even though it's not explicitly stated, I think Jonathan was bitten on Dracula's final night in the castle. It's his blood that revives Dracula's youth, and I think that is why he reacts violently to seeing the blood dripping from Dracula's mouth.

We also know from Van Helsing that anyone bitten by a vampire will become one. What complicates this is Dracula's blood exchange with Mina, if biting her is enough to turn her then why have her drink his blood? I theorize that having a victim drink his blood allows him to have a connection with or influence on them that he otherwise would not. He seems unaware that Lucy is dead when he gloats about the group's women belonging to him, and as there is no evidence that Lucy received his blood then it would make sense that he doesn't have that connection with her and thus, would be unaware of her true death. Going by this logic, If Jonathan is turning into a vampire then it seems unlikely that he received the Count's blood as he doesn't seem to have any mental link to Dracula either. I have seen the argument that Dracula did have a mental connection with Jonathan that was broken when he began to target Lucy instead, as Dracula Daily made it clear that Jonathan's 'brain fever' broke on the day that Lucy sleepwalked (slept-walked?) to Dracula.

Jonathan is likely Anglican, and says that his religion finds crucifixes and the like 'idolatrous', meaning that it's unlikely he would commonly come into contact with religious items in his day-to-day life. When he was in the convent/hospital he was delirious and in bad physical condition, it's possible that-like Mina with the wafer- he was reacting negatively due to his latent vampirism. Perhaps the early, prolonged exposure to religion suppressed his vampirism, and it fades away as he gets away from it. It could explain his slow recovery in England.

(It is also interesting to note that, while in the convent, Jonathan is being cared for by Sister Agatha. As a recovering Catholic I unfortunately retained some of my religious knowledge, and Nuns take on new names when they take their vows. Usually they take the name of a biblical figure that inspires them; in Sister Agatha's case it would be Saint Agatha who is, amongst other things, the patron saint of rape victims. Vampire bites have a loooooong history of being an allegory for sexual penetration and, with Mina's attack later in the novel being a clear reference to sexual assault, it seems likely to me that this was a subtle nod by Bram Stoker that Jonathan was bitten. Unfortunately it would likely have been censored if he had been more blatant given Victorian censorship laws.)

With this in mind, it's likely that seeing Dracula in London 'unlocked' his suppressed vampirism, and could explain him passing out. Though, admittedly, he does have a history of fainting when confronted with horrific things.

Going back to Jonathan's connection to sacred items, we never see him come into contact with any directly. When the group is entering Carfax Jonathan is handed two vampire deterrents, a wreath of garlic flowers and an envelope with a bit of communion wafer in it. Jonathan makes a point to mention that the garlic is withered however; I have to wonder why it was specifically called out as withered. Could that lower it's efficacy? As for the eucharist, well, it's in an envelope. The Count, a full vampire, reacts badly to it when the envelope is brandished at him. However, Mina, not yet fully turned into a vampire, seems to only be negatively affected when it touches her skin directly.

Another piece of evidence that I find interesting is Jonathan's hair color change. Listening to Re: Dracula made me realize that we have another character whose hair changed color; Lucy after her death. Vampire Lucy is described with dark hair, whereas in life her hair was compared to sunshine (meaning she was most likely blonde). Now we have Jonathan, whose hair was described as dark brown by Seward, turning white. The Characters write it off as shock despite the sudden change (shock/stress would have caused it to grey over time, realistically speaking), but it is interesting to note the link to vampire Lucy.

Jonathan's quick responses to Dracula's presence in the Piccadilly house are also notable. You could argue that it's the daytime so the Count is not as fast as he would be otherwise, but Seward points out that he, Arthur and Quincey are all experienced hunters and yet Jonathan, who Seward described as a 'quiet, business-like gentleman' when he met him 5 days earlier, is the first person to react. Jonathan goes so far as to climb out of the window to follow Dracula when he retreats.

It is entirely possible that Jonathan is in denial of having been bitten; he says himself while in the castle that 'I think strange things, which I dare not confess to my own soul.' He would likely have been bitten on the neck, a place he can not see without a mirror, and Dracula makes a point to destroy the only mirror Jonathan had. Jonathan specifically notes that there are no other mirrors in the castle, either. Thus, if he was bitten but reluctant to admit it, he would have had no way to see if he had a wound and it would further justify his reaction to finding Dracula bloated with blood in his tomb. Denial is a hell of a drug. If he can not confess it to himself, it seems unlikely that he would tell anyone else, especially after his illness that affected his perception of reality.

As I said, I don't currently have access to my copy of the book to check the future dates so I will look for more evidence as we get the daily releases, but I think there is pretty strong evidence that Jonathan is in the process of turning and doesn't realize it.

[globalworship]

Tree of Life (icon by Br. Robert Lentz)

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ARTIST: Br. Robert Lentz, OFM

ARTWORK NARRATIVE:

In the first centuries after Jesus’ death, he was never depicted suffering on the cross. When artists finally began depicting him on the cross, he was shown either in a peaceful repose or as a king in glory. Other medieval crosses were studded with precious jewels. A third type of cross was the Tree of Life, filled with vegetation and harkening back to the Green Man revered in the old religions of northern Europe. Realistic crucifixes that graphically depict Jesus in his death throes were an innovation of the late Middle Ages. In this icon Jesus is the Tree of Life. He shines at the center of four arms that stretch to the four sacred directions -- reminiscent of the Native American medicine wheel. He is the center of creation. Exotic vegetation coils from him, or towards him, depending on one’s perspective. He is the fulfillment of the ancient Green Man of old Europe, as well as the vine spoken of in John’s Gospel. He is the World Tree, Yggdrasil, the pole of the universe, upon which shamans and other mystics travel to experience the divine. Having become part of creation, and unjustly executed, he is the advocate of all those who have been trampled underfoot. Slain on the cross, but risen, he declares that God’s greatest miracle is to bring life and light even out of injustice and death.

Information is from this webpage, which has prints you can buy: https://trinitystores.com/collections/tree-of-life-rltol

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Artist bio:

Robert Lentz is a Franciscan friar whose innovative icons are known throughout the world. He is a member of Holy Name Province, and is stationed in Silver Spring, Maryland at Holy Name College. Besides painting many hours each day, he teaches apprentices, writes, and conducts workshops on art and spirituality throughout the United States. Brother Robert is active in promoting dialog between Muslims and Christians. He is also committed to the indigenization of Byzantine iconography in the various cultures embraced by the Church.

Brother Robert was born in rural Colorado in 1946. His grandparents emigrated from tsarist Russia in the early 1900's. He studied Byzantine iconography by apprenticing himself to a master painter from the school of Photios Kontoglou in a Greek Orthodox monastery founded from Mount Athos.

His icons reflect his experiences among the poor in this country and in the Third World, as well as his Franciscan and Russian roots. They are filled with bright colors and often depict contemporary subjects. While always striving to remain true to the essence of Byzantine iconography, he adapts traditional conventions in order to minister better to the emerging Church. His icons remain transcendent expressions of the ancient Christian Tradition, and they invite us into communion with God and the saints.

Text above is from this webpage, where you can browse dozens of his icons: https://trinitystores.com/collections/br-robert-lentz-ofm

[seashellronan]

The button says "talk to me about anything" so random question: how did/do religious tensions impact your life? Is the catholic v protestant thing still evident in Ireland?

I find it fascinating, as I'm Australian and protestant but have ended up going to catholic primary school, high school, and university. Not deliberately, they just happened to be good schools in my vicinity.

tbh religious tensions don’t really effect me which i’m very lucky to say but i’m from the mayo in the west which is mostly catholic and i know tensions still exist in the north. I also wasn’t raised very religious my mam and brother both go to mass regularly although my mam says she has her own religion and i think she enjoys the meditative action of sitting in the church and focusing on the things she cares about and for my brother he sings in the choir and enjoys the community and neither of them support any of the backwards ideas although most of the people i know who are actively catholic don’t (again that’s just my experience) and i was never forced to go to mass it was always given as a choice even when i was very young. Again i know many have a different experience like my boyfriend was an alter server and his mam actually cried when he told her as a teenager that he didn’t want to go to mass anymore but my dad had lost all faith in the catholic church a long time ago with everything they’ve done in ireland so he never went to mass so i didn’t have to either. But also my brother is much older than me and was raised with my nanny who i know really encouraged him to be involved in the church and even wanted him to be a priest so even in my family there’s different perspectives.

I aslo went to a gaelscoil(all irish language school) for primary school which are actually required to be educate together schools and are supposed to be secular. We still did some religion classes but it was rarely and we also made our communions etc but we also had some non catholics my best friend at the time was a jehovah’s witness and a boy in my class was raised atheist. As for secondary school i went to a convent of mercy however it was a small town so we still had plenty of non catholic kids and even a muslim girl in my later years there as there was little choice for schools so they had to be open.

I live in Dublin now which is really multicultural and has so many different people from different areas at this point the catholic protestant thing for a lot of people here exists as a joke or a story (obviously there are still areas with huge religious tensions) and i admit if i meet someone and they’re protestant i still find it strange but i actually sang at a protestant wedding last year. So for me it’s a very neutral thing but i do know some people who are really effected by it and religious tension definitely still exists in ireland and it is still very much something that is in the public consciousness still and that most if not all irish people are aware of

[thefirstknife]

Throwing my hat into the ring regarding the Black Garden stuff, by way of the Scatter Signal lore tab. It seems to be referring to the Black Heart, but what I'm most interested in is the second line. "Minds orbit its gravity, to bridge communion with a Voice, to move from parallel to entanglement." We know the Vex are interested in the Veil, and the Sol Divisive with the Darkness especially. To me at least, this line implies that they're trying to become one with either the Witness, or the Darkness. It's just a guess, but if the Vex know that Riven or Ahamkhara could get them through the portal, they may be looking for a way. I can't connect it, but I also feel I should mention that when Osiris made the Sundial, its core "whispered" and he even states “You know I can’t make another bargain like this one.” to Sagira when she asks where this will end for him.

Just made a post with some stuff about all of this, including about Scatter Signal!

The entirety of the Scatter Signal message is so bizarrely worded that it could be interpreted in so many ways. I've seen the possibility that it might refer to the Sundial, specifically the line "They dream of a dark core, contained within a timeless structure." The Sundial literally has a dark core contained in a timeless structure and we still don't know what this dark core is. I never believed it to be an Ahamkara piece as I think it's far closer related to Darkness (the core was eating Light, and "whispers" are a common thing with Darkness: think of how the Veiled statues whisper in Pyramids or how Nezarec relics whispered (he is also referred to as a "whispering Nightmare" by one of the other disciples)), but without any proof for any of the theories, it could be anything.

One thing I can add is that there's a dialogue this season between Osiris and Riven that I believe disproves the Ahamkara theory, at least with how I'm reading it. Riven tells Osiris:

Isn't it unfortunate your City hunted down all of my kind, Osiris? You might have wished for Saint-14's return from the Forest.

If the Sundial core is the Ahamkara bone, then he did wish for Saint's return from the Forest. So either Riven is massively misinformed about this or the Sundial core is not Ahamkara. Osiris also very much replies in a way that makes it sound like he did not even consider dabbling in wishing magic because of the price Saint would possibly have to pay. Another point is that if Osiris wished for Saint through an Ahamkara-powered Sundial, then he would have succeeded. But he didn't. The Sundial did not work for him. It worked for us, because Saint and the Young Wolf are connected through a loop, a perfect paradox. That is the only reason why Saint was saved. Obviously we used Osiris' Sundial to achieve this and it could not have been done otherwise, but if it had been powered by an Ahamkara, it would've simply worked for Osiris. But either way, given that Riven teases him about how he could've just used an Ahamkara, it seems to imply that he didn't. Because if he did, then Riven would've possibly just congratulated him or teased him about he messed with wishing magic.

This is a weird line in general because, as Osiris points out, Riven's bait is too obvious here. It's also a bait for a wish that serves no purpose; Saint is already back. Even if Osiris was baited into thinking something rash, there's nothing to be done because Saint returned over 3 years ago. I feel like if Riven truly wanted to mess with Osiris, she would have gone for the more recent loss; Sagira. Who is not returned and cannot be returned with conventional measures that anyone knows about. Essentially, there is nothing that can bring back a Ghost, perhaps not even an Ahamkara, but it would be a more tempting line of thought.

The way I'm reading Scatter Signal right now is that someone is informing us about what the Vex want or what they're trying to do. I believe it refers to the Black Garden and something they're trying to achieve in there in order to finally learn how to play on an even playing field with the rest of us; understanding paracausality. Even though not all Vex agree on everything, they all do agree that they need to understand paracausality and the only way to that understanding is in our system. Therefore, Sol is Salvation.

I am also thinking deeply about what they could possibly be doing with the Ahamkara and if, perhaps, they are also learning how to bargain with them and if they are also somehow trying to use them to achieve their goal with paracausality or enter the portal with us. And I am thinking, very deeply and with concern, about what price we will pay for making this wish to enter the portal. What if the Vex are also playing with the Ahamkara simultaneously with us, and if the price to this bargain to enter the portal is that Vex will learn paracausality as a consequence.

So it's on us to decide if this is a price worth paying and we know, that whatever the price is, we will accept it. We really don't have a choice. So we can either hope that Riven will be satisfied with us saving her eggs and essentially reviving her species and will therefore not require the wish to backfire on us horrifically or... She won't be. And as all Ahamkara, there will be a consequence. And for what we're asking, that consequence has to be big.

Also remember, the wish was made by Savathun. Savathun knew ahead of time that the universe will need this wish to follow the Witness. And she must've known that the consequence will be big. So she left it to us and conveniently skedaddled away. All in all, I don't believe this is as simple as us saving Riven's eggs and Riven flinging us into the portal. Nothing is ever simple with Ahamkara and definitely not with the Vex.

[supermarine-silvally]

❤️ + Portada pls!! -🍂

Part 2 of this!

❤️ first kiss / realization

Something was terribly, horribly wrong. 

Ace had first noticed it at breakfast. He had stuffed his plate with as much bacon as Thatch would let him get away with and sauntered over to his usual spot, wedging himself between Yara and Marco. The First Division Commander had greeted him as per usual, but Yara didn’t even bother to glance up from the saddest bowl of oatmeal Ace had ever seen; the only garnishing on it two solitary raisins. 

(He knew for a fact that she didn’t even like raisins. They reminded her too much of the crappy communion wine at the convent she grew up at, she’d told him once, scrunching her nose up in that adorable way she did whenever she found something particularly unsatisfactory.)

Throughout the rest of the day, things seemed to only get worse. She kept her gaze down and her answers monosyllabic whenever he tried to interact with her-- and that was when she didn’t outright leave the room as soon as he entered. 

“Trouble in paradise, yoi?” Marco had asked him when he caught Ace moping around on the Moby Dick’s upper deck.

Ace let out a massive, depressed sigh in response, draping his arms over the gunwale. Part of him almost wished a strong gust of wind would come along and knock him into the water. “I think I did something wrong, Marco. I haven’t seen her this upset with me since before I officially joined the crew.”

The doctor placed his hand on his friend’s shoulder. “You need to talk to her about it. I’m sure whatever it is can easily be fixed. Yara may be stubborn, but she’s not unreasonable.”

“That’s… true,” Ace conceded. He stood up straight, his determination renewed. “I’ll go find her. The sooner I can sort this out, the better.”

“Good luck, yoi,” Marco said, giving him a firm pat on the back. 

And that was what led him here, hanging out near the entrance to the mess hall, biding his time. There was no way that Yara could avoid him forever… could she?

“Ace.”

He instantly perked up, a relieved grin spreading across his face as he caught sight of her heading towards him, a file stuffed with papers tucked under her arm. She, however, did not return his joy, but instead stared emotionlessly back at him as she handed him the file. “Pops said to give this to you.”

He nodded, receiving it from her. “Oh, thanks! …Right, these are the maps I wanted to see.”

Yara gave him a curt nod in return before pivoting back towards the entranceway.

“Wait, where are you going?”

She stopped, turning to face him again, her eyes narrowed. “I came. I gave you the file. And now I’m leaving.”

“Yara!” Ace called out after her, dropping the file onto a nearby table. He reached for her hand, but his fingers passed straight through her. His brow furrowed, confused. Now she was using her Devil Fruit powers with him? She never did that.  

“I’m not in the mood, Ace,” was all she replied, her tone icy.

His entire body wilted, heart thudding pitifully in his chest as she left the mess hall without so much as a second glance. Oh, he had definitely fucked something up. 

☠-----⚔-----☠-----⚔-----☠

“Yaraaaaa…” Ace knocked on her bedroom door. “Can we talk? Please?”

He held his breath, waiting. Finally, after a moment, the latch clicked. Yara opened the door a crack. She was wearing her nightdress, her loose hair cascading down her shoulders. Ace couldn’t help but notice the dark circles lingering under her eyes as she stared at him. 

Swallowing, he took a step back. “Hi.”

“It’s late, Ace.”

“I know. I couldn’t sleep.”

“Then I suppose you’ve come to let me down easy,” she said with a sigh.

His brow furrowed. “Let you down what?”

“Never mind. I shouldn’t delay the inevitable. Shall we go somewhere more private than the living quarters?”

Nodding, he allowed her to step out of her room before following her down the hallway. She led him down the stairs and outside to the second level balcony. The stars glinted overhead as the Moby Dick gently careened along its path, cutting through the ocean’s calm surface. Yara leaned against the railing, the faint breeze catching the edge of her nightdress. Just the sight of her underneath the moon’s light was enough to make Ace’s stomach twist into knots. 

He sucked in a breath. There was no way he could let this go on any longer. “It’s the stupid dare thing, isn’t it? That’s why you’re upset with me.”

“I’m not upset with you,” Yara replied evenly. “I’m upset with myself.”

“What? Why?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Yes, it does. It matters a lot. Especially if I… if I did something to hurt you. Please, Yara. You’re…” He swallowed. “You’re one of my best friends. Whatever it is, I’ll make it right.”

Yara glanced away from him, a conflicted look flickering through her eyes. “I… made a foolish miscalculation,” she said after a moment. “I thought that… perhaps you might…” She hesitated. For a moment, he could’ve sworn he saw a faint blush spread across her cheeks. “That, well… That kissing me wouldn’t have been as intolerable for you as it evidently was.”

“Intolerable?” His brow furrowed. “Kissing you wouldn’t be intolerable.”

“Oh, please.” Her glare narrowed as it returned to rest on him. “You dragged your feet and then turned away at the last second. How the hell else could I possibly interpret that, Ace? From my standpoint, it was a fairly obvious rejection.” 

Ace’s heart was practically beating out of his chest as the realization slowly dawned on him. “Hold on a minute. You… wanted me to kiss you?”

Yara’s nose scrunched up, her mouth drawing into a tight line like it did whenever she was frustrated by something. Finally, she turned away with a sigh. “…You’re an idiot of the most hopeless variety. Let’s just forget this ever happened.”

“Yara, wait.” He reached towards her, catching her hand. This time, her flesh stayed solid, and he curled his fingers around hers as he pulled her in. 

She let out a surprised gasp as one of his hands moved to her waist, the other tenderly cupping her face. Her skin felt so soft as he lightly stroked her cheek, the butterflies that had been nesting in his stomach bursting to life. 

“Last night, I really, really wanted to kiss you,” he breathed. 

“Then why didn’t you?” she whispered, eyes widening as his fingers traced along the small of her back. 

“Because I didn’t want our first kiss to be something either of us would regret,” he confessed. “You’re too special to me for that.���

“Ace…”

“I never thought I’d meet someone like you, Yara. Someone who just… accepted me so easily. Who didn’t care at all about my good-for-nothing father. The last thing I ever would’ve wanted is for you to think I only kissed you because Haruta dared me to, and not because I’m madly, stupidly in love with you, and I have been ever since Pops brought me onto this ship.”

Her eyes went unnaturally wide. “What?”

“Oh.” Ace blinked, his hand leaving her waist to awkwardly scratch the back of his neck. “Shoot, did I just say that out loud?”

He took her stunned silence as an affirmative. “So, uh… would it be okay if I kissed you now?”

“Please,” Yara breathed, leaning in. Their foreheads pressed lightly together, noses brushing as they revelled in each other’s warmth. His arms wrapped around her waist, the cotton fabric of her nightdress bunching between his fingers as he pulled her tight to his chest. She clung to his bare shoulders, the tips of her fingers smoothing along his collarbone, each feather-light touch setting off fireworks in his stomach.

“You’re so beautiful, Hellcat,” he murmured against her lips, feeling her breath hitch. 

“Kiss me already, Fire Fist,” she whispered, the neediness in her voice sending a jolt of pleasure throughout his entire body, small flames flickering involuntarily off his skin.

He wasted no more time in closing the gap between them, lips slotting into place as if they were always meant to do so. The whole world ceased to exist around him as their mouths moved in sync, the taste of her flooding his senses, all the pent-up love he’d kept locked in his heart for so long finally flowing freely through him.

One hand slowly drifted upwards, tangling in her long violet hair as he cupped the back of her neck, pressing himself forwards to dip her down, stealing a tiny gasp of air before continuing the kiss. He could feel Yara’s lips twitch upwards, the sensation making him grin into the kiss as well. 

They broke away, foreheads coming to rest against each other’s as Ace cradled Yara’s cheek in his palm. “I love you,” he admitted. “I’m sorry for not telling you sooner, and for being such an idiot last night.”

Yara laughed softly. “After that kiss, you’re definitely forgiven. And I…” Her face flushed, looking away for a moment before returning her heterochromatic gaze to meet his dark eyes. “I love you too, Portgas D. Ace. You dummy.”

“You love me too,” he repeated, unable to keep himself from grinning wildly. His heart felt as if it were on fire, burning with an intense, aching passion. I never thought I’d ever hear anyone say those words to me. I’m hardly deserving of them, yet… Yet it still feels so nice.

He slipped an arm around her waist, letting her rest her head on his shoulder as they both gazed out at the moon and stars beyond. “So… where do we go from here?”

She shrugged. “Wherever we want, I suppose. We’ll figure it out together.”

Smiling, he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “That sounds perfect.”

tagging: @auxiliarydetective @oneirataxia-girl @daughter-of-melpomene (and @box-of-bats too if you want the narrative resolution to the last prompt hehe)

[calabria-mediterranea]

The Story Of Natuzza Evolo: Calabrian Mystic

Natuzza was a Calabrian mystic who acted as a medium and healer, showed evidence of stigmata, and could “bi-locate” — be in two different places at once. She is also connected with “hemography,” which is when blood stains miraculously transform into symbols, shapes, and even words, particularly Christian ones like crosses.

Natuzza was born in 1924 in Paravati, a tiny hamlet near Mileto in Calabria. Her given name is Fortunata, from which the diminutive “Natuzza” comes. Natuzza’s father had left for Argentina a few months before she was born, and he never returned, leaving Natuzza’s mother alone to care for her newborn as well as her other children.

Natuzza never learned to read or write and helped support her mother and siblings by working for local families. She allegedly began having her first visions as a small child — Jesus, it is said, appeared to her as a boy who played with her and one of her brothers — but her brushes with the dead didn’t become popular knowledge around town until she began experiencing them as a young teen at work.

And it wasn’t just apparitions with Natuzza, even as a child. At her First Holy Communion, her mouth reportedly filled with blood when the wafer symbolizing the body of Christ was placed inside. At her Confirmation, a large stain of blood in the form of a cross formed on the back of her shirt.

Because of Natuzza’s experiences with the paranormal, as a young woman she was closed in an asylum with a diagnosis of "hysterical syndrome" for a few months by the local priest and was not permitted to enter a convent to become a nun.

Natuzza became known for the appearance on her body of blood-coloured images and words around the time of Easter and these caused her great psychological and physical pain. Some of the words were found to be Hebrew and Aramaic which was strange because she could not read or write, even in her native Italian. For decades devout Catholics from Calabria, then the rest of Italy and other parts of the world, began coming to her to ask for advice and prayers and to ask her for information about the souls of their relatives.

In addition to seeing Jesus, Natuzza also claimed to have also seen and communicated with the Virgin Mary, angels, and the dead, particularly souls in purgatory, throughout her life.

Natuzza was also considered a healer, credited with being able to look at a person and tell them what was ailing them, physically — using formal, medical terminology — as well as suggest treatments. She could also see the future and sometimes spoke in languages she didn’t know (remember, again, she was illiterate). In fact, some of her blood stains even transformed into phrases in foreign languages.

However, Natuzza never accepted money for what she did or was accused of participating in anything fraudulent based on her abilities, which, in the eyes and hearts of many, lend credence to her and her followers’ claims.

"It's a question of removing the suggestive religious context from the event. It doesn't allow rational reading since it cloaks it in mythology and unprovable hypotheses," says the Italian Committee for the Checking of Pseudoscientific Claims, or CICAP.

The group believes the so-called stigmata cases are really examples of Gardner-Diamond syndrome, "a skin condition that, although rare, is well documented in medical literature." The syndrome gives rise to a series of periodic, painful and bleeding bruises of unclear origin, combined with psychiatric disorders such as self-harm.

Although she’s relatively unknown internationally, Italians have been fascinated by Natuzza for generations as she has been a popular subject of books and various Italian television programs.

After Natuzza passed away on All Saints’ Day in 2009, about 30,000 people traveled from all over Italy and beyond for her funeral in rural Calabria. One-hundred priests and six Italian bishops were also in attendance.

Follow us on Instagram, @calabria_mediterranea

[cruger2984]

THE DESCRIPTION OF OUR LADY OF PROMPT SUCCOR The Patroness of New Orleans and the State of Louisiana Feast Day: January 8

The French Ursuline nuns first arrived in Louisiana in 1727. The nuns established a convent and founded what is the oldest school for girls in the territory of the modern-day U.S., Ursuline Academy, which educated the children of European colonists, Native Americans, and those of the local Creole people, slave or free. The Spanish sisters came to assist the growing school in 1763 after Louisiana fell under Spanish control.

In 1800, the territory came back under French possession, and in 1803, most of the sisters, fearing the anti-clerical sentiment of the French Revolution, fled to Havana, Cuba. When Louisiana passed into the control of the United States, the sisters sent the President a letter asking if their property rights would be honored by the new government.

Short of teachers, Mother Saint Andre Madier requested sisters from France to come to America to aid the struggling convent. She wrote to her cousin, Mother Saint Michel Gensoul, who was running a Catholic girls boarding school in France at the time. The Catholic Church was suffering the wrath of the revolution under Napoleon. Mother Saint Michel, knowing that the Church was in distress in both her homeland and abroad, approached Bishop Fournier of Montpelier to request a transfer. Bishop Fournier felt unable to afford the loss of another nun, as many had been killed or fled during the revolution, and advised Mother St. Michel that only the Pope could give this authorization.

Pope Pius VII was a prisoner of Napoleon at the time, and Mother St. Michel knew the unlikelihood of the Pope even receiving her letter. She prayed before a statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary and said: "O most Holy Virgin Mary, if you obtain for me a prompt and favorable answer to this letter, I promise to have you honored at New Orleans under the title of Our Lady of Prompt Succor."

Sending her petition on March 19, 1809, Mother St. Michel received a letter from the Pope Pius VII granting her request on April 29, 1809. Mother St. Michel commissioned a statue of the Virgin Mary holding the Infant Jesus. The workman carved her flowing robes so that she would appear to be moving quickly. Bishop Fournier blessed the statue and Mother St. Michel's work.

Many miracles have been attributed to the intercession of the Blessed Virgin Mary under the title of Our Lady of Prompt Succor. Two historical events are especially associated with the Virgin. The first occurred in 1812 during the eruption of a great fire in New Orleans devastating the Vieux Carré. The Ursuline convent was facing imminent destruction as the winds blew the terrible fire toward the Plaza de Armas.

An order was given to evacuate the convent, however at that moment, a nun named Sr. St. Anthony (Marthe Delatre, daughter of Antoine Delatre) placed a small statue of Our Lady of Prompt Succor on a window seat and Mother St. Michel began to pray aloud, "Our Lady of Prompt Succor, we are lost unless you hasten to our aid!"

The second major miracle occurred in 1815, three years after the disastrous fire. General Andrew Jackson's 6,000 American troops faced 15,000 British soldiers on the plains of Chalmette. On the eve of the Battle of New Orleans, New Orleans residents joined the Ursuline sisters at their convent in the French Quarter to pray throughout the night, imploring the help of Our Lady of Prompt Succor.

On the morning of January 8, the Very Rev. William Dubourg, Vicar General, offered Mass at the altar on which the statue of Our Lady of Prompt Succor had been placed. Cannon fire could be heard from the chapel. The Prioress of the Ursuline convent, Mother Ste. Marie Olivier de Vezin, made a vow to have a Mass of Thanksgiving sung annually should the American forces win. At the very moment of communion, a courier ran into the chapel to inform all those present that the British had been defeated. They had become confused by a fog and wandered into a swamp.

The Mass ended with the singing of the Te Deum, and an annual Mass of Thanksgiving has been held January 8 ever since.

Pious believers of New Orleans pray before the statue of Our Lady of Prompt Succor, asking for her intercession whenever a hurricane threatens the city. During hurricane season, prayers are said at every Mass in the city during the Prayers of the Faithful requesting Our Lady of Prompt Succor's intercession and protection. After Hurricane Katrina, prayers were made to Our Lady of Prompt Succor asking for the quick recovery of the damaged city and surrounding area.

On June 13, 1928 - the feast of St. Anthony of Padua, Pope Pius XI declared the Blessed Virgin Mary, under the title of Our Lady of Prompt Succor as the Patroness of Louisiana.

[brandwhorestarscream]

Also in the multi world convention I'd love to hear TFA Ulltra Magnus try to boss around the Optimi and be told to show respect to The Primes by his TFP counter part and Lectured on his The Violations of the Autobot Code of Personal and Professional Conduct by IWD Ultra Magnus.

LMFAO YEAH 😂

I wonder if TFA Ultra Magnus is actually old enough to remember a time when there was such a thing as a true Prime: like, how far back in time was the title of a Prime made into nothing but a military rank? Has he ever met a bearer of the Matrix? Or were they weeded out before his time?

Regardless, he's very taken aback. In almost every universe there's only one Prime and that is Optimus. And he's considered to be the rightful ruler of the autobots (and Cybertron even, by some), because he's in communion with the god of life himself. That's absolutely insane, in Magnus's opinion XD he's in for a brutal reality check

[monasteryicons]

The saint who bumped into things An image of purity, courage, and prayer, Saint Kateri Tekakwitha was the first Native American woman to be canonized by the Catholic Church. Daughter of a Mohawk chief and an Algonquin Indian woman who had converted to Catholicism, she was born in in present-day New York in 1656. A smallpox epidemic in 1661-1663 left her an orphan, with a badly scarred face and impaired eyesight.

Because of her poor vision, Saint Kateri was named "Tekakwitha," which means "she who bumps into things.”

She was taken in by her uncle, who was bitterly opposed to Christianity. As a young girl, in accordance with Iroquois custom her foster family paired her with a young boy who they expected she would marry. However, Saint Kateri chose to dedicate her life to God.

When she was 18 she began instruction in the Catholic faith in secret, having come into contact with the Jesuit missionaries that frequented Mohawk villages after the French forces defeated the Mohawks. Her uncle finally relented and gave his consent for her to become a Christian, provided that she did not try to leave the Indian village. For joining the Catholic Church, the young girl was subjected to accusations of sorcery and promiscuity, and ridiculed and scorned by villagers who even threatened her life.

Taking the name Kateri (Catherine) at baptism, two years later she escaped to the Mission of St. Francis Xavier, a settlement of Christian Indians in Canada.

The village in Canada was called “the village of the praying Indians.” Here she was known for her gentleness, kindness, and good humor. On Christmas Day 1677 Saint Kateri made her First Holy Communion and on the Feast of the Annunciation in 1679 made a vow of perpetual virginity. She also offered herself to the Virgin Mary, asking Our Lady to accept her as a daughter.

Most of these early Indian converts were women, devoted to the Christian ideals of charity and asceticism. When they learned of nuns and convents, many wanted to form their own and created an an informal association of devout women. Saint Kateri taught prayers to children and worked with the elderly and sick. She would often go to Mass both at dawn and sunset and was known for her great devotion to the Blessed Sacrament and to the Cross of Christ. A Jesuit priest quoted Saint Kateri as saying: “For a long time my decision on what I will do has been made. I have consecrated myself entirely to Jesus, son of Mary. I have chosen Him for my husband and He alone will take me for wife.”

During the last years of her life, she endured great suffering from tuberculosis. She died on April 17, 1680, shortly before her 24th birthday, and was buried in Kahnawake, Quebec, Canada. Her final words were "Jesus — Mary — I love you."

The Jesuit priest Fr. Cholenec later wrote: “This face, so marked and swarthy, suddenly changed about a quarter of an hour after her death, and became in a moment so beautiful and so white that I observed it immediately.”

Before her death, Saint Kateri promised her friends that she would continue to love and pray for them in heaven. Both Native Americans and settlers immediately began praying for her heavenly intercession. Several people, including a priest who attended her during her last illness, reported that the saint had appeared to them and many healing miracles were attributed to her. She is venerated as the Protectress of Canada and the patron saint of Native Americans and ecology.

See her icon here:

[nalyra-dreaming]

hello!! I just rewatched Daybreakers and now I can't stop thinking about what Louis would do if he had the chanto to get a cure from vampirism...

what debates would he have with himself? how would this affect his relationship with Lestat and the others?

(I'm throwing this at you for you to elaborate, I love you <3

Hey!

*hugs* 💕

Hmmmm, difficult. :) (Oh, yeah, Daybreakers, I remember!)

I think... it depends on which "Louis" we're talking about, and in which "phase".

Because Louis' journey over the books is as complicated one as Lestat's (and I'm quite sure it will be over the show as well), and... I do think his stance on a cure would change. And it depends heavily on what the cure entails, too.

So, for the sake of the argument let's assume it's "cure for vampirism aka Louis becoming mortal again", with no extra powers, no body switching necessary, no magic. Just the transformative properties of the Dark Gift gone.

The Louis after leaving NOLA, pre Claudia's death, still very much in the Rite of Passage might have taken it, I think. Book and show, though the show made clear that Louis knows Lestat didn't die then, so that complicates things.

But he suffers from what he is, and what he must do to survive. He does not like the price he has to pay. The Dark Gift didn't free him in the way Lestat promised, how could it, and the killing is of course something that tears at his soul.

If he would have been offered a cure, I think he would have taken it and tried to make Claudia take it, too. (That might have failed, but that is another discussion^^) I think he would have seen it as a second chance. Show Louis, with the knowledge of Lestat surviving, might even have gone back and tried to give it to Lestat... and, all things considered, I'm not 100% sure Lestat wouldn't have taken it then, either, in that situation. He tried to become mortal again in later books after all.

The Louis post Claudia's death... no. Unlikely. He was "dead" then, for a long while, and he went on because he could not not. I think he saw it as a form or punishment, mixed with vicious survivor's guilt, and the sheer trauma of Paris. Show Louis called Claudia his redemption, and ... I think a cure would have been seen as a redemption as well and as such... clashing with what happened to Claudia, if that makes sense.

Dubai Louis, later books Louis (TtotBT)... does not want the cure. He wants release. I think Louis is in a state of chronic depression then, likening his state to a purgatorial one in the books, from which not even becoming mortal would free them. (Which then culminates in the Merrick events.)

"This is purgatory we're in, you and I. All we can be is thankful that it isn't actually hell."

And then... after Merrick.... in the "resentment phase" I think he would have been tempted. Because he is not "able" to die then anymore, not by conventional means at least. And that in and by itself is a very daunting prospect of course, and the cure would have been another get-out-of-jail card he could have taken...

But I think Louis, deep, deep down... didn't want to die then anymore. He'd been there, done that, did not go into the light.

He stayed. And so, despite being tempted, and viciously so, and maybe even having gone to beg Lestat (or maybe even Armand) to come and argue with them to be mortal with him once more... I think he would not have taken it. But I can see them arguing about it, viciously. The temptation would have been there, but too much had happened then already.

And in the end... around the Prince Lestat era and Blood Communion?

No. Then, not anymore. He has made his peace then, has found his family, his place. Has found himself. He would not wish to lose all that.

So... it depends, I think. :)

Despite everything Louis likes the power and his life and the status it affords him, too. He just, for the longest time, does not like the price. And he needs to come to terms with the realities of it, because he... chose it.

He was not forced into it, and that weighs heavily on him, especially with the more sobering realizations of it not being the freedom he hoped for or was promised. And the realities of the relationships not being what he expected them to be, either.

Louis' choice of his state of being weighs into his choice of taking the cure... and in a way his conscience is too... pure, too clean for him to take it, if that makes sense. He will choose the suffering (until he has accepted), because he chose this life.

Saint Louis.

Or to quote a (bitingly rakish) Lestat here:

"But then he is so good at grieving! He wears woe as others wear velvet; sorrow flatters him like the light of candles; tears become him like jewels."

PS: I didn't delve too deep into "debates with himself" here, because... that's fanfic level of delving, too long for tumblr, imho :))) I'm tempted to write it all out though, so... maybe^^.

[thepastisalreadywritten]

SAINT OF THE DAY (April 6)

Crescentia was born on 20 October 1682 in Kaufbeuren, Bavaria, Germany.

She spent her play time praying in the parish church, assisted those even poorer than herself, and had so mastered the truths of her religion that she was permitted to make her first Holy Communion at the then unusually early age of 7.

In their town, she was called “the little angel.”

As she grew older, she desired to enter the convent of the Tertiaries of Saint Francis.

However, the convent was poor, and because Crescentia had no dowry, the superiors refused her admission.

Her case was then pleaded by the Protestant mayor of the town to whom the convent owed a favor.

The community felt it was forced into receiving her, and her new life was made miserable.

She was considered a burden and assigned nothing other than menial tasks. Even her cheerful spirit was misinterpreted as flattery or hypocrisy.

Conditions improved four years later when a new superior was elected who realized her virtue.

Crescentia herself was appointed mistress of novices. She so won the love and respect of the sisters that, upon the death of the superior, Crescentia was unanimously elected to that position.

Under her guidance, the financial state of the convent improved and her reputation in spiritual matters spread.

She was soon being consulted by princes and princesses; bishops and cardinals also sought her advice.

And yet, a true daughter of Francis, she remained ever humble.

Bodily afflictions and pain were always with her. First, it was headaches and toothaches. Then she lost the ability to walk.

Her hands and feet gradually becoming so crippled that her body curled up into a fetal position.

In the spirit of Francis she cried out, “Oh, you bodily members, praise God that he has given you the capacity to suffer.”

Despite her sufferings, she was filled with peace and joy as she died on Easter Sunday on 5 April 1744.

She was beatified by Pope Leo XIII in 1900. He was canonized by Pope John Paul II on 25 November 2001.

[paula-of-christ]

What do you think of girls altar serving?

I feel as though this is a rather loaded question, and that the only reasonable response could be construed as ambiguous or a cop-out. However, I will answer it anyways.

I don't know of any moral reason why girls can't or shouldn't be altar servers. It is a good way to learn Mass and learn how and why the Eucharist is so important to the Faith first hand. However, having been an altar server and hearing from young men who have served with women, I think it should be reserved for when and if boys or men are not available.

I think there has been a large movement, at least in the U. S. where I am, to only have children (between the ages of First Communion and Confirmation) be altar servers, which when you don't have many young boys in the parish, can become problematic. However, if parishes treated it like the Magisterium says it ought, which is for either the serving of parish needs or as a step in discernment of priesthood, it should be reasonable for men of any age to partake, so long as he has had his First Holy Communion.

From my own experiences I can definitely attest that there is a great misunderstanding that can happen in young girls when allowed to altar serve but then told they cannot be priests. They help the priest in every way during the Mass but then will never be able to do that themselves. I think it requires a portion of cognitive dissonance to say that, it ends up becoming a very arbitrary line drawn in the sand about what women can do in the parish and what they can't.

Preemptively answering a possible follow-up question, I don't think proclaiming the Word in the First and Second Readings falls under the same category, if only because mothers are meant to be the first person to teach children Scripture. As, of course, we see Mary do with Christ, and her mother St. Anne do for her. But having also done that, it is significantly different than altar serving.

Now, in a convent, or at a women's retreat, I think it is definitely reasonable, assuming there are no seminarians around to do so. However, when seminarians are around it is technically their right to do so over any other lay person, whether men or women, and I think that speaks to what altar serving is about.

It's why even Pope Francis hasn't officially instituted any woman into that role like he did with being a Lector. Because it *is* an exclusive right to seminarians, and only if a parish or chapel does not have any, does it fall to the next step which is men, since only men can be seminarians.

[dustedmagazine]

Mons Veneris — Ascent into Draconian Abyss (Signal Rex)

Lock up the communion wine and cover those tender orifices (earholes included), Mons Veneris is back. If you are as delighted by that news as this reviewer, maybe seek help. But also seek out this record and play it, at excessive volumes. Doing so won’t make you a better person, or a happier or a healthier one. Repeated exposure to Ascent into Draconian Abyss will likely garner opposing results: worse, more miserable, more disturbed. But we should note that those words also describe the general condition of the earthball and most of its inhabitants. Somehow the music of Mons Veneris — black metal that manages to be traditionalist and utterly singular at the same time, no small feat — keeps creeping in from the margins, and along that trajectory it ascends closer to the light of day, which is increasingly difficult to distinguish from Nietzsche’s infamous abyss.

So it’s apt that Ascent into Draconian Abyss seems to stare back, with unabating truculence and bizarre intensity. The Portuguese band doesn’t ease you in: the opening, title track is a 20-plus minute experience, modulating from strangely primal chanting in its first 50 seconds; through long expanses of elemental, more-and-less recognizable black metal riffage (though still afflicted with some of that primal, mournful chanting and moaning); into angular eddies and even slightly more conventional song forms, which threaten to resolve into black’n’roll (to be sure, Mons Veneris has a strong taste for obscenity, but let’s not get carried away). Mostly though, “Ascent into Draconian Abyss” seems to dramatize that very thing — a hard climb, an endurance contest with dread, which ends up dropping you into a psychologically fraught void.

When you finally clear those 20-odd minutes — and are extricating yourself from that void — “Whisperers of the Plague” seems to restate the first track’s main riff and rhythmic structure. It’s dispiriting; do we have to do this all over again? But the band is just messing with us. The riff eventually mutates and the following 16 minutes get progressively stranger. There are the musical equivalent of mechanical failures, spates of more demented chanting and the band even permits itself a sort of guitar solo (which is as alarmingly ugly as you might suspect it would be).

But it’s in the final song, “Chant to the Unknown,” that things get really weird. After the foregoing 38 minutes, the song’s dalliances with hummable melody and conventional aesthetics are disorienting, even transgressive. Because it’s Mons Veneris, those dalliances are counteracted by echoing, off-kilter pulsations of guitar, which add dizziness to the disorientation. Even standing on dry land, you’ll feel a little seasick. Just as you achieve better footing, the music falls away, and washes of electronic noise, a fogbank of sound, drift in and envelope you. You get lost all over again, and you start looking for signs of that aforementioned ascent. Good luck: the fog is pretty thick. And what’s that smell? Sulphur? Is this stuff mist or smoke? We both know the answer to that. It’s a Mons Veneris record: “Abandon all hope, ye who enter here….”

Jonathan Shaw

[psychreviews2]

The Secret Of The Golden Flower

The Secret Of The Golden Flower

As Buddhism's influence expanded in Asia, it encountered many different cultures that appropriated elements of it. There was always a pressure to make these philosophies fit normal human relationships and worldliness. One of the examples of this is Taoism, which when Buddhism encountered it in China, ushered in a mutual influence. Meditation could be hermitic, but there could also be applications found for dealing with the business of daily life. In both philosophies, rumination is to be let go of, and harmony with others balanced. The ultimate source of consciousness of course was to be looked at as not an experience or a thing, but in the world of perception, there is always a compromise. As quoted in the Lankavatara Sutra nirvana is not a real thing to be sought after in the conventional way. "Mine isn’t a nirvana that exists, a created one or one with attributes, the consciousness that projects what we know. The cessation of this is my nirvana." In the Taoist Discourse on Sitting and Forgetting, there are "three commandments of 'reducing involvement in mundane affairs', 'having no desires' and 'calming the mind,'" where the "'Dao will come to those who observe these three commandments regularly and constantly, even when they are not purposely seeking the Dao.'" As the practice develops "'inwardly, one becomes unaware of one’s body, and outwardly, one becomes unaware of the universe'; 'one penetrates a subtle communion with Dao and all worries disappear'; and when 'one forgets both the world and himself, neither of these two instances are reflected in the mind.'" There is a deeper rest with these methods as conscious experience itself is relaxed, but it's not a place to rest permanently when one is engaged with the world. It becomes a source for replenishing energy when needed, and in the longer term a weaning practice.

In The Secret of the Golden Flower, labels and metaphors are applied to this supreme rest as a guide for daily life. "The original spirit is also called the celestial mind, or the natural mind. A mode of awareness subtler and more direct than thought or imagination, it is central to the blossoming of the mind." Because perception, craving, and action are so omnipresent in day to day experience, there's an endless need to use negation as a way to point out what this source is not. "Using neither idea nor image, it is a process of getting right to the root source of awareness itself. The aim of this exercise is to free the mind from arbitrary and unnecessary limitations imposed upon it by habitual fixation on its own contents...The experience of the blossoming of the golden flower is likened to light in the sky, a sky of awareness vaster than images, thoughts, and feelings, an unimpeded space containing everything without being filled. Thus it opens up an avenue to an endless source of intuition, creativity, and inspiration." The concept of Oneness comes from encountering boundlessness in meditation.

Typical of all spirituality is the trap of always using the mind that is hooked on advertising, and the mind's need to find a variety forms of treasure in the outer world, and to treat meditation in that same way. All that searching involves more rumination and controlled movements of the attention span. "There are very many alchemical teachings but all of them make temporary use of effort to arrive at effortlessness; they are not teachings of total transcendence and direct penetration. The doctrine I transmit directly brings up working with essence and does not fall into a secondary method. That is the best thing about it." The rub of course is the need for effortful concentration, but it becomes a double-edged sword when the mind doesn't know how to concentrate with less effort. Regardless, both insight and concentration has to work together as the mind gradually lets go of the habit of obsessive rumination. For many people, they will get more out of long periods of concentration than direct insight at the beginning, but when concentration becomes too dull with mastery, the mind is now ripe for insight. As I've mentioned many times before, an effortless waiting for the breath to move on its own, an acceptance of how automatic sensations work, leads to a reduced need to tighten and control muscles in the body, including the head. When approaching meditation for the first time, it may not be so easy to do, and an experience of Flow, or Jhana, is required to provide a comparison with the typical daily consciousness full of rumination. "On the whole beginners suffer from two kinds of problems: oblivion and distraction. There is a device to get rid of them, which is simply to rest the mind on the breath...The light is easily stirred and hard to stabilize. When you have turned it around for a long time, the light crystallizes...Generally speaking, the two afflictions of oblivion and distraction just require quieting practice to continue unbroken day after day until complete cessation and rest occur spontaneously..."

Mindfulness: Nirvana: https://rumble.com/v1grcgx-mindfulness-nirvana.html

How to gain Flow in 7 steps: https://rumble.com/v1gvked-how-to-gain-flow-in-7-steps.html

As things become more effortless, they never really become completely effortless. Concentration is always needed to bring the mind back to those bodily anchors, which in this case is to have some of the control to take a backseat and let the waiting and listening for bodily nature and self-regulating operations, to be as they are. When you notice distraction, you are already back and you can commence waiting for the breath to move independently. "The light itself is the creative; to turn it around is to restore it...Just persist in this method...It is also essential to understand that this device is not mechanical or forced. Just maintain a subtle looking and listening." Any subtle movement of the attention span requires some effort. At first, one may react with a non-preference for thinking, but later on, a subtle awareness of tension in the head and body, related to thinking, is enough for awareness to naturally return to the body. A looping judgement about thinking and intellectualization can be efficiently worked out of habit and economized. "When you are not sitting quietly, you may be distracted without knowing it; but once you are aware of it, distraction itself becomes a mechanism for getting rid of distraction." On the other hand, if you do any math problems, ruminate about how to handle difficult people, make any complicated plans, the reality is that you need some effort to use memories and plans to think, control, and act. Any attempts at control involve effort, and a resistance can be detected when what is not preferential arises. One can easily notice energy expended when this is happening in real time. For example, when in a meditative state, one can scientifically compare the tension between a clear mind and one that is beginning to rehearse or ruminate. There can also conversely be an appreciation for the thoughts that arise spontaneously in the clear mind, because they are often the most creative and sharp when the mind is well rested. Even if there is some effort encountered in those situations, there's often a zest to them, and there is an insight that a complete shutdown of creativity would be just a derangement, or a self-induced forgetting or dementia.

Deep meditation is simply for deeper rest, not for a lobotomy. In fact, mental rehearsal is a big factor in developing skills, so a minimal effort is required before a skill gradually becomes more effortless. Accepting that there is no conscious panacea in spirituality, unless one is effortlessly dead, can reduce the clinging to some absolute perfect rest that is unattainable in the midst of vigorous thinking and activity. This is especially true when the mind is well rested and interested, where effort is actually enjoyable and the "problem" is moot. Also from the understanding of psychoanalysis, the practice of free association, which is just a repackaged form of meditation, it releases past resentments with the Oedipus Complex, which in general is an anger towards human obstacles of all kinds. There's a great need to vent, rage, and exhaust emotions related to any conflicts about goals, property, and boundaries. From the point of view of spirituality, one has to be willing to let go of worldliness with the insight that those things people fight over are not worth it in the long run. No object or experience in the past has ever given complete satisfaction, as can be proven by one's further desires for new things. Each individual has to pick their battles to not be a doormat, but a lot of things can be let go of on the periphery. Businesses, governments, acquaintance groups, and families are all full of subtle or more overt conflicts and resentments. Toxic people also leave their wake all over society so a sense of pragmatic minimalism makes more sense for a contemplative lifestyle in the modern world. Since all good experiences require memory to appreciate, the height of conventional appreciation is a Proustian recall that happens when a past experience cannot be relived, then the precious memory becomes a perfume of appreciation, precisely because we desire what we cannot access, assuming one still has good enough memory in old age. One can use this as a guide for what to chuck out of one's home, or as Marie Kondo suggested, "the best way to choose what to keep and what to throw away is to take each item in one's hand and ask: 'Does this spark joy?' If it does, keep it. If not, dispose of it."

Meditation: Trap Doors: https://rumble.com/v1grer7-meditation-trap-doors.html

Knight of Cups | The Awakening 9:48: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFVFqVlfe8Y

Object Relations: Fear Of Success Pt. 2: https://rumble.com/v1gvuql-object-relations-fear-of-success-pt.-2.html

There is an awareness in these spiritual texts that conditioning is powerful and can only be gradually weakened. "The ancients' method of transcending the world, refining away the dregs of darkness to restore pure light, is just a matter of dissolving the lower soul and making the higher soul whole...'The light rays of the human body all flow upward into the aperture of space.' If you get this, long life is herein, and so is transcendence of life." The rest is in this aperture, but it's all encompassing. 'The words focus on the center are more sublime. The center is omnipresent; the whole universe is within it. This indicates the mechanism of Creation; you focus on this to enter the gate, that is all. To focus means to focus on this as a hint, not to become rigidly fixated. The meaning of the word focus has life to it; it is very subtle." The searching for this center has to eventually surrender to what is effortless. "The terms stopping and seeing basically cannot be separated. They mean concentration and insight. Hereafter, whenever thoughts arise, you don't need to sit still as before, but you should investigate this thought: where is it? Where does it come from? Where does it disappear? Push this inquiry on and on over and over until you realize it cannot be grasped; then you will see where the thought arises. You don't need to seek out the point of arising any more. 'Having looked for my mind, I realize it cannot be grasped.' 'I have pacified your mind for you.'"

Since thoughts arise out of nothing, the need to find the source of thoughts becomes another burden to put down. "So should one have no thoughts? It is impossible to have no thoughts. Should one not breathe? It is impossible not to breathe. Nothing compares to making the affliction itself into medicine, which means to have mind and breath rest on each other. Therefore tuning the breath should be included in turning the light around." This is the beginning of integration of spirituality and worldly life. Different senses and perceptions point to the same effortless source. "This method makes use of two lights. One is the light of the ears, one is the light of the eyes. The light of the eyes means the external sun and moon, combining their lights; the light of the ears means the internal sun and moon, combining their vitalities. However, vitality is congealed and stabilized light; 'they have the same source but different names.' Therefore clarity of hearing and seeing are both one and the same spiritual light."

Activities of daily life include thinking and awareness, and concentration is more about prioritizing peace and focusing on what to do now, while staying away from distraction about the past and irrelevant future. "Killing the mind does not mean quietism, it means undivided concentration. Buddha said, 'Place the mind on one point, and everything can be done.'" Even as distractions return, the habit of awareness can permeate them to a certain extent and reduce the amount of time that one is carried away. "As for unawares oblivion and oblivion of which you become aware, there is an inconceivable distance between them. Unawares oblivion is real oblivion; oblivion that you notice is not completely oblivious, clear light is in this...Oblivion means the lower soul is in complete control, whereas the lower soul is a lingering presence in distraction. Oblivion is ruled by pure darkness and negativity." Integration can further be developed by including this kind of rest in action, so that actions are without too much effort, or too little. Even "looking inward" is more like resting in natural awareness without fixating too much one way or another. "What is 'looking'? It is the light of the eyes spontaneously shining...What is 'listening'? It is the light of the ears spontaneously listening...Listening means listening to the soundless; looking means looking at the formless." One needs to recognize form, but without fixation. This can help Buddhist students understand better the value of sensation and being with the body, while treating thoughts as passing sensations, as read in the Bahiya Sutta. "Then, Bahiya, you should train yourself thus: In reference to the seen, there will be only the seen. In reference to the heard, only the heard. In reference to the sensed, only the sensed. In reference to the cognized, only the cognized. That is how you should train yourself. When for you there will be only the seen in reference to the seen, only the heard in reference to the heard, only the sensed in reference to the sensed, only the cognized in reference to the cognized, then, Bahiya, there is no you in connection with that. When there is no you in connection with that, there is no you there. When there is no you there, you are neither here nor yonder nor between the two. This, just this, is the end of stress."

The Bahiya Sutta: https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/ud/ud.1.10.than.html

As resting in the natural develops, with a combination of insight and continuity of attention, non-hedonic pleasure begins to flower. "When there is uninterrupted continuity in quiet, the spirit and feelings are joyful and happy, as if one where intoxicated, or in a bath. This is called positive harmony pervading the body, its golden efflorescence suddenly blooming. Once 'myriad pipes are all silent,' and 'the bright moon is in the sky,' you feel the whole earth as a realm of light. This is the opening up of the luminosity that is the substance of mind, the proper release of the golden flower." The promise of this practice is to provide a spiritual strength, when non-hedonic peace is preferred over other pleasures. This new stability of mind can make one more adventurous, because the seclusion becomes more portable. "Once the whole body is filled completely, you do not fear wind or frost. When you meet things that make people feel desolate in facing them, your vital spirit shines even brighter. The house is built of yellow gold, the terrace is white jade; the rotten things of the world you bring to life with a puff of true energy. Red blood becomes milk, the physical body is all gold and jewels. This is the great stabilization of the golden flower...As you go along practicing turning the light around, you need not give up your normal occupation. An ancient said, 'When matters come up, one should respond; when things come up, one should discern...' If you manage affairs with accurate mindfulness, then the light is not overcome by things, so it will do to repeat this formless turning around of the light time and again." This is the form of renunciation that is authentic, because it's not a forcing out with internal conflict, ambivalence, and miserliness. Taoist integration can deepen, and activity can continue because one is choosing available and accessible activities. Effort is not too much or too little. "If you can look back again and again into the source of mind, whatever you are doing, not sticking to any image of person or self at all, then this is 'turning the light around wherever you are.' This is the finest practice...The essence of the great Way is to act purposefully without striving. Because of not striving yet acting purposefully, one does not fall into indifferent emptiness, dead voidness."

The final perfection, which I think is practically impossible, is one that requires a lot more boundaries and a monastic, hermitic lifestyle at a minimum. One still requires donations to connect one's feeding to the general economy, which again means someone has to strive, work and donate for others to live according to this perfection. In a world of violence and threats, there's always situations where one has to resort to survival reactivity for self-defence. It may be possible for some people to achieve this by purposefully neglecting survival, but I suspect that it's only a goal or principle to guide one closer to that inhuman ideal. "Now when you turn the light around to shine inward, [the mind] is not aroused by things; negative energy then stops, and the flower of light radiates a concentrated glow, which is pure positive energy...Now if in all activity and rest you abide in heaven while in the midst of humanity, the sovereign is then the real human being. When it moves, you move with it; the movement is the root of heaven. When it is at rest, you rest with it; the rest is the moon cavern."

Zen Master Gu Ja - Just eat, sleep and shit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HHFH2oQxNA

What feels more realistic is the trial and error attempts at integration that creates true knowledge through experience and bodily anchoring. "If the celestial mind keeps still and you miss the right timing in action, then that is an error of weakness. If you act in response to it after the celestial mind has acted, this is an error of staleness...Once the celestial mind stirs, then use pure attention to raise it up to the chamber of the creative, with the light of spirit focused on the crown of the head to guide it. This is acting in time." The translator Thomas Cleary, summarizes that "the golden flower practice can stop thoughts temporarily, but it does not warp reason. It enables one to think deliberately rather than compulsively. This use of mind opens a wider space for thought, with the ability to think and observe thought with detached clarity, so that one can put down useless thoughts and take up useful thoughts by means of independent discernment and will. The speed of its direct perception can also see at a glance where a train of thought will lead, conserving untold mental energy."

The Way of Flow

The reality for most people is that there are numerous micro-tensions in action, and because there's always some subtle use of energy, real life obstacles can cause considerable frustration for people at any level of meditative skill. It's not always how we miss the right timing to match an effortless breath with an action. So much of our intellectual life requires mental processing power, thoughts about choices that do matter to us emotionally, and unless a person is a complete renunciant, any form of pleasure that is experienced will have a natural clinging to want to repeat. The vast majority of readers are not going be like that. For most people, meditation is for rest, and even with integration, there is an enjoyment with thinking and acting that was never seen as problematic. What is often not talked enough about in spirituality is the value of concentration in daily life and how it can facilitate moments of effortlessness, or how Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi labels it: Flow.

For Csikszentmihalyi, our desires are helpful in maintaining a cohesive self. When you want to understand beauty, develop a new skill, and try to keep your body and mind intact and ordered against chaos, there is a kind of Tao in that. In Flow and the Foundations of Positive Psychology, he went beyond the typical need to match skills and challenges, with the intention of avoiding boredom and stress, so as to understand the psychological necessity in concentration. There is a kind of Tao in how he integrated so many of his earlier influences in psychology and philosophy, so the applicability is universal. Just like in Freudian psychoanalysis, self-preoccupation, a form of tiring narcissism that can appear when there is insecurity, it can force one to over effort into mimicry, acting and inauthenticity. People can't easily be themselves, and like in The Cure song Jumping Someone Else's Train, it's easy to be distracted by others who seem to be absorbed and happy. "According to the classical theories, a young person wants to imitate an adult who has status and power, someone who has control over desired resources, who can reward and punish. Socialization is supposed to be based primarily on fear, envy, and greed." Of course, the solution is to get absorbed in your own projects. The great thing about people is that they have different talents and abilities, so their point of absorption where skills meet challenges will be different, and therefore move against a hive mind. Society also requires differences between people to facilitate trade, and to reduce conflict over scarcity.

The Cure - Jumping Someone Else's Train: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1oWf07FRCw

Being distracted by others and what they are doing has two pathways. One is that of envy, with self-preoccupation, or that of inspiration and concentration. For Mihaly, those inspirational moments should send one into an absorption afterwards, and so life goes on and time flies when  you're having fun, or at least you've found yourself being interested. This is much better than being a wet blanket where "...self-awareness interrupts involvement in an [otherwise] enjoyable activity." Going further than that, the concentration itself works with activity to build a sense of self. Someone fractured by endless imitation and distraction will be stuck. "The self shows itself as a pattern of information in consciousness; more specifically, it is information that stands for, or represents, the information-processing organism itself. It is composed of past experiences strung together by acts of intentionality and shaped by feedback...Being a pattern, the self requires inputs of energy to keep its order intact. Like consciousness itself, of which it is one of the contents, the self does not keep its shape unless appropriate information is constantly provided to perpetuate its existence. To put it in the simplest possible terms, the self survives by assimilating feedback to intentions."

The monastic attitude in all religions is against endless Flow, because the distractions and interruptions can be jarring, but at the same time, many who meditate don't want to completely destroy the sense of self, and even many in spiritual practices have no intention of destroying their mental narrative or attempt to forget it. "This is the reason why religions that try to abolish the self prescribe giving up desires and purposeful actions. Renouncing worldly attachments is the central method used to destructure the self in Zen, Sufi, Yoga, Judeo-Christian, and several other spiritual traditions...Most people in most cultures, however, learn to develop their selves rather than aiming to dismantle them. In fact, once a self system is established in consciousness, it will try to maintain itself and increase its power. It can do so by directing the energies of the organism to produce feedback congruent with its intentions...Paradoxically, when we focus attention on the self, by so doing we deprive it of the sustenance it needs..."

"By contrast, concentration on an activity produces feedback which nurtures the self. This is especially true if the activity is freely chosen, if it presents opportunities for complex interactions and allows the formulation of increasingly unpredictable intentions. As a result of such an activity—and assuming it was moderately successful—the self emerges strengthened from the evidence of its accomplishments. So the self gets lost when we search for it, and reveals itself when we forget it...A non alienated self and the ability to find flow are the best predictors of happiness. Another way to view this pattern is within Mead’s conceptual framework. Attending to the self reveals the 'me,' or the self as object. Strictly speaking, the 'I' can never be found in consciousness. We can only sense it in action, so to speak; we know of it through its works. At best the 'I' appears as a flicker at the periphery of vision as we pursue some difficult or improbable task. For only then is the 'I,' or the active, self-determining agency of the self, revealed..." This means that the self appears ephemerally when we control the environment in a successful way and feel some sort of elation or satisfaction. What is left after the feeling vanishes is the conceptual self and evidence of the work completed. Alienation happens when others sabotage the work, criticize it unfairly, or try to take credit for it. Alienation also appears when attention from authority figures becomes the goal. Intrinsic motivation is seeing for oneself the value of one's work and how it helps oneself and loved ones. Surplus work can be traded on the market for the desired surplus of others. Imitation is necessary to find examples of pleasure and enjoyment for learning, as long as the pleasures are authentic and one is honest about the consequences. Those who imitate run the danger of imitating all the bad things from the role model in the effort to assimilate the good.

"Enjoyment builds the self. But the self destroys enjoyment; that is, when we reflect on the self, the interaction is interrupted, concentration collapses, and the feedback stops. Thus in the long run self-awareness is inimical to the self, because it interferes with the flow of information that is necessary to maintain it...Consciousness and the self are fragile structures of order that need constant inputs of information energy to expand or even to keep their form intact. The kind of information which can do this has certain common properties: it can be assimilated with neither too little nor too much difficulty; it presents opportunities for interaction with clear goals, rules and feedback; it allows concentration without distraction or ambiguity."

Now, there is a need for some self-preoccupation so that one can be aware of what one is doing wrong, but without concentration, the energy needed to make changes, the self-esteem energy, can be depleted and cause analysis paralysis. With endless imitation with our electronic devices, advertising, and pressures to keep up with the Joneses, it's easy to be found "jumping someone else's train." Meditation in the modern world isn't necessarily about going to nirvana and to remove survival attachment from the world, but to use it as a way to find rest and to regenerate interest. The intuition found in meditation often knows where to find those spots where skills and challenges meet in a good way and slowing down can be a way to get in touch with authentic inspiration. Some of the things we like and want often have a lot of entropy, wear and tear. Addictions can appear where the sensitivity to consequences is dulled. Resting in meditation can help to relax impulsivity and the mental peace created can provide space for intuition that has been stifled. One can also be more assertive and interact with those intuitions and ask questions. Anita Moorjani provided some examples: "What is my body trying to tell me?" "How can I love myself more?" "Why do I attract these relationships?" "How do I let go of these relationships?" There are endless examples to pay attention to, but it can be simplified by assessing how energetic or how heavy intuitions are. Is there any excitement, lightness or peace? Sometimes you think you want to do something and you get a relief when you realize that it's much better not to do anything at all.

Connecting with Inner Guidance - Anita Moorjani: https://youtu.be/AJjpTeAFw30?si=Ejm8i_p3OJjMo7fG

How to connect with your inner wisdom - Michele Theberge: https://youtu.be/1evyf4CiATA?si=0iYcWMrCjFS2auA6

How To Use Your Intuition (The Inner Voice) - Teal Swan: https://youtu.be/eiiJBfIVmJo?si=_kradTlbdlZ9EkUw

The Hidden Link Between Anger and Self-Loyalty - Teal Swan: https://youtu.be/ehkhdfWf5B0?si=tmyNTkqJ3FqLEih1

A Foundation in Silence - Adyashanti: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P-EsjO8lndM

Still small voice - Adyashanti: https://youtube.com/shorts/W_h5PqrDIbg?si=Kk3lIUylOXDTftHP

Some people want to formally remember any perceptions and jot them down in notes. Some of the crazier, stranger, cryptic symbols can take longer periods of time to fit into an understanding. Different camps arise where positivity is more emphasized, but others find that negativity has a lot of truth to it. One of the pleasant elements of dealing with the negative is that if there are any areas where actions are possible, you can relax and not ruminate when those problems are in the past. Conversely, positive intuition tends to point to environments and situations where activities and behaviors can be optimized. What environments would be best for these skills? This is a big clue for those interested in career advancement or career change. The smaller the leap between transferrable skills and a new position, the more successful that transition will be. You don't need a career counselor to tell you how you should feel. Author Alain De Botton, a very successful writer for example, job shadowed a career counselor in his The Pleasures and Sorrows of Work, and you would think that his test results would confirm that. Instead he was assessed as a "candidate [displaying] average abilities which would render him well-suited to a range of middle-ranking administrative and commercial posts." Since all transitions have gaps in knowledge, one can drop a perfectionist attitude towards an unending seamless life experience. A lower expectation can help people tolerate imperfection, and the role of concentration now increases in importance. Being able to breathe effortlessly while waiting for a slow computer, for example, can save pockets of energy. For Alain, high expectations have to be supported with large doses of reality, or self-preoccupation will return and destroy any potential pleasures that could exist in more mundane jobs. Concentration allows for appreciation in a normal humdrum daily life, but high expectations could lead to disappointment, resentment, and maybe revolution. "I left the [Career Counseling] company newly aware of the unthinking cruelty discreetly coiled within the magnanimous bourgeois assurance that everyone can discover happiness through [Freud's] work and love. It isn't that these two entities are invariably incapable of delivering fulfillment, only that they almost never do so." When you make success an entitlement, whole populations can potentially hate their own being and motivate them to "burn it all down," so to say. This is why comparison and envy can be so destructive, yet a person who is currently in concentration is consciously experiencing greater well-being than a rich person stuck in self-preoccupation.

Because things aren't optimum, one doesn't have to be overly afraid of some negative feelings arising from self-preoccupation, from time to time, because if those situations are used as a compass, then opposite situations can be sought out as a way to create meaning and provide fresh new goals. Role models who are more positive tend to be more authentic teachers and provide a crucial healthy avenue for an onlooker stuck in self-preoccupation. "It is, rather, the conviction they conveyed that what they were doing was worth doing, that it was intrinsically valuable...He could not fake enthusiasm, conviction, or belief either for our sake or for his own...Meaning cannot be taught; it can only be demonstrated in one’s own actions." In Mihaly's definition of an inspirational teacher, positive role models provide examples of a possible future for students. Inauthentic teachers do the opposite. "Education fails when becoming an adult is no longer a desirable option...To be convinced, a youth has to feel that being an adult can be meaningful. This in turn requires exposure to persons who derive intrinsic rewards from adult roles. Similarly, young people will not want to become philosophers or scientists if their teachers do not enjoy philosophy or science."

Not everyone of course is mentally healthy enough for this. Some may dread the most basic actions because of their woundedness and depression. Mihaly quoted a healthy example from Dante. "In every action…the main intention of the agent is to express his own image; thus it is that every agent, whenever he acts, enjoys the action. Because everything that exists desires to be, and by acting, the agent unfolds his being, [so] action is naturally enjoyable." Mihaly wanted a playfulness in agents, but not to the point of being aimless. There also has to be enough seriousness to try to do something well. The power of the role model is when their pleasure becomes confirmation that certain challenges can be fun. "It is important for teachers and parents not to emphasize too much the instrumental aspects of education. The more learning is talked about as simply a ticket to a well-paying job, the less easy it will be for students to realize its intrinsic rewards. The most effective message is one that is embodied in the adults’ living example. A parent or teacher who reads complex books for enjoyment, who listens to stimulating music in free time, who gets involved in ideas and in challenging conversations, is a concrete proof that learning can be rewarding in and of itself." In this case, the intrinsic benefits would be the pleasure that manifests when performance is good in one way or another.

People have to take in rules at times from society, like the rules of a sport, but eventually the agent has to be able to assess for themselves if they are getting better. When the activity is discontinued, the intuition can light up to return to the activity when a viable way to improve dawns on the mind. It's always pointing to the appropriate challenges and skills. "People voluntarily concentrate on tasks when they perceive environmental demands for action matching their capacity to act. In other words, when situational challenges balance personal skills, a person tends to attend willingly." This means that the new information being assimilated can't be too overwhelming. "It seems that every time people enjoy what they are doing, or in any way transcend ordinary states of existence, they report specific changes in attentional processes. To be conscious of pleasurable experiences one must narrow the focus of attention exclusively on the stimuli involved. What we usually call 'concentration' is this intensely focused attention on a narrow range of stimuli...[For example,] a university professor described his state of mind when rock climbing, which is his favorite leisure activity: 'When I start to climb, it’s as if my memory input had been cut off. All I can remember is the last thirty seconds, and all I can think ahead is the next five minutes…With tremendous concentration the normal world is forgotten.'" Like in a good meditation, the mind focuses on the just right amount of information to engage in the activity without being distracted. "Optimal experiences occur when a person voluntarily focuses his attention on a limited stimulus field, while aversive experiences involve involuntary focusing of attention."

Because of this, Mihaly has a reminder for social engineers who want to bend the world in their direction. "The intense concentration required for complex achievement appears to be available only when given willingly..." Therefore the "voluntary focusing of attention on a limited stimulus field is necessary to achieve socially valued goals." This emphasis can also be applied to parenting, to allow children some freedom of choose, and a relaxed concentration can be role modeled to convince kids that it can be enjoyable when concentration is chosen freely. Children that can develop concentration and apply it to as many activities as possible will stand a good chance of enjoying life and have the ability to make their own life choices independently and authentically. Surrendering desire then becomes an aid for rest and provides many experiences to help people practice facing their own mortality.

WEF Spokesman Unwittingly Endorses Trump For President! - The Jimmy Dore Show: https://youtu.be/Y3-ICqFkjjU?si=bSCWbfO7s0hF2d9p

Worldly life, Negotiation, and Conflict

In a modern world full of digital trappings, and no matter how hermitic and secluded a person's lifestyle is, it's all interdependent. Because families, economies, political environments, and technologies are all interconnected, a monastic lifestyle cannot teach enough skills that are suited for a householder lifestyle. Even further, the pathological side of worldly life is not something you can shield yourself from all the time. Violence, crime, and conflicts of all kinds can potentially arise with a regularity, especially in big cities where a larger population is competing for space. The Buddhist Papañca typically in these situations with others, goes into thinking about those others, and how to predict their behavior. In psychoanalysis, it's ruminating about objects, or thinking about people you find difficult, and having the pressure to predict how they will behave. It leads to those automatic thoughts and plans for the kind of responses you would like to perform. As noted in my episode on Trap Doors in regards to spirituality, one has to have people skills, especially if one is to have boundaries and have the ability to say no in worldly life. Negotiation is a worldly skill.

An irony in spirituality is that when you apply boundaries, you kind of are a little hermitic already. For example, people who have suffered the abuse cycle, of intermittent reinforcement, that gradually increases the punishments, a predictable C-PTSD that arises afterwards makes many want to be hermitic once more. The cycle is typically a form of idealization (rewards and praise), devaluation (punishment and criticism), triangulation (playing people off of each other), and discard (rejection). That cycle is in businesses, governments, families, friendships, and intimate relationships. The irony of modern life after the introduction of digital creativity is that many people are already living a hermitic lifestyle because of these toxic relationships. Some people didn't wait for a discard phase and just left because it was so predictable. Adding even more heaps of irony is the fact that spiritual institutions are also supplying these toxic patterns for your astonishment, and what was a promised escape often ends in absurdity. In response to that, many modern people find themselves floating around in schizoid lifestyles with a mastery for sublimation in personal projects. This is to the point where they can't be easily labeled as Schizoid when their personal projects are the only ones they have enough confidence in to control and achieve a modicum of fulfillment. Unfortunately, introverts are often times treated as if they are potentially anti-social dangerous people, when in a lot of cases they are busy and engaged, and sometimes more so than than those criticizing them. And it also doesn't help single people when they try to make friends and end up becoming a third wheel or a potential rival for a mate, which often happens when psychologists push patients to get into the love and work dynamic more assertively. Alone and single people also have to deal with lost employment with those employers who dislike the independence of single workers and who prefer those who have marriages, children and mortgages. Those types can't uproot so easily and are forced to be obsequious to bosses, no matter how unfair the treatment.

Meditation: Trap Doors: https://rumble.com/v1grer7-meditation-trap-doors.html

We Don't Get It Until We Go Through It - NARCDAILY -You Are Not Alone: https://youtu.be/VaNlx8PHjro?si=eK6enlQixrNvnacF

Why Your Silence Is The Key To Healing - NARCDAILY -You Are Not Alone: https://youtu.be/D0kj7cJ2QS4?si=wUwNFe-Z0nAcFMuW

Sublimation - Sigmund Freud: https://rumble.com/v1gv2fr-sublimation-sigmund-freud.html

Schizoid Trailer: https://youtu.be/az1RqTxCIvs?si=g9DRNbljlMdY2AE_

Schizoid Personality Disorder | InternetKindness: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lowhBuZambA

Discrimination Against Singles - Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/happy-singlehood/202201/discrimination-against-singles

Why I Don't Have Many Friends - Natasha Newton: https://youtu.be/N6wdBDOVAqg?si=oCnKRqEvmDfZbSzQ

I have no friends (in my 50's) The Unexpected Gypsy: https://youtu.be/ZDxc7OAOq_E?si=mrqGlurCj2IkE_ce

I didn't have friends most of my life - being ‘unsocial’ and finding belonging - The Cottage Fairy: https://youtu.be/9vcQqPLDDgo?si=ywGSnc7e0tgDJfyP

The reason why I have no friends - Verdant Vanille: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J5GjobP6dRA

I Have No Friends | Why I Don't and How I've Learned to be Okay - Emily Joy: https://youtu.be/umpAC4pKFV4?si=QSEXcwQH-GqIU1tw

Loneliness improved my Art and Mindset - Valerie Lin: https://youtu.be/fR-37iygzsY?si=LIABk9DcQ76SBDN2

Live ALONE- you are enough - Reflections of Life: https://youtu.be/VfgWldeGsIQ?si=xCLXKGW7o7EF6JH3

Being ugly: My Experience - Never Give Up: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1n5nOEJtrYA

Why Being Ugly is a Blessing - James Ray Gregory: https://youtu.be/r50r3r0ahFc?si=9AkKlU0cAZ2JrXM-

In a metropolitan modern life, many are also experimenting with worldly lifestyles by moving to different countries. There are both people wanting to live in another country where they become a visible minority, and there are those who grew up as a minority and want to move to countries of origin, to escape the feeling of being "Othered." In a New York Times article Blaxit, by Colette Coleman, African Americans described the burdens they left behind in the U.S. "Mr. Bradley, 63, who moved with his wife, Marlene, 69, from Los Angeles to Rwanda in 2021 before settling in Zanzibar, said that arriving in Kigali felt like 'a load off my shoulders'...Mrs. Bradley also felt relieved and safer in Africa. 'You don’t feel like you’re looking over your shoulder,' she said...In Uganda, [Mrs. Kirya-Ziraba] no longer faces 'a thousand cuts' of racism, she said. For years she had made accommodations, big and small, to try to control other people’s perceptions: smiling to appear nonthreatening, buying nicer clothes to avoid being mistaken for a domestic worker, and straightening her hair to be seen as more professional. She knew she had been acquiescing, but, she said, 'I didn’t know the extent until I didn’t have to do any of that.'" The reality of why there's so much conflict becomes the buried-lead in the story. African Americans in their example do have cultural aspects that are different from the ones found in many African countries, so the feeling of escape can be short-lived.  For example, some countries are very militant against LGBT individuals. "In Uganda, the Anti-Homosexuality Act enacted last year punishes gay sex with life imprisonment and in some cases death. Similar bills have been introduced in other African countries, such as Ghana and Kenya."

Blaxit: Tired of Racism, Black Americans Try Life in Africa - Colette Coleman: https://1ft.io/proxy?q=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.nytimes.com%2F2024%2F02%2F16%2Frealestate%2Fafrican-americans-africa.html

10 Reasons Why African Americans Leave Africa And Never Return - Freedom Chasers: https://youtu.be/7ikjODzn1BA?si=CgZRxetujQCrpjNb

3 Reasons People Don't Stay in Africa - Awaken With Mark: https://youtu.be/udz9jaPK6eM?si=VUQFbakf3y9qQE3q

10 Reasons Why You Should NOT Move To Africa - Freedom Chasers: https://youtu.be/HB51GPOjL_Q?si=VPlT6Go2_1KazyRe

Ugly Truths About Ghana by Gabby Mack: https://youtu.be/Mjvu8SqxMOc?si=QYX4ZHqqAsrSLG4q

Why are you gay? - Poopoophobic Pasta: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bmLU-Q2KlH4

Eat the Poo Poo extended - Poopoophobic Pasta: https://youtu.be/KhmUqJzu9eI?si=qXthHV5J9UG058x5

Uganda president signs anti-gay law that includes death penalty - NBC: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3l7_e8_BqTQ

Why Western Men Are Manipulated By Thai Women: https://youtu.be/fh7S8X5oA7Y?si=YAmaW3G3Qx8y4uq9

Do Black People Face Racism in Japan? - Seeds Of Success: https://youtu.be/aT3r4BX29sw?si=DctOxy9dbvb6l0-f

"Don't Come To Tokyo ..." - The Black Experience Japan: https://youtu.be/srXYLdW15sM?si=mbuxD8OLNTUxD3j6

Why South Koreans are so racist towards people from certain countries - Korean Jin: https://youtu.be/b8Hib_epDGY?si=CWNAV0kjDqcpIucG

India being racist to China vs China being racist to India - Mexico-Columbia: https://youtube.com/shorts/jAoRkThRAD8?si=ld_O71Fpx5i0XnaZ

Are Indians racist? - Hindustan Times: https://youtu.be/HPsAFmtrupc?si=pPmgamgyV2ufmNxs

Is the South racist? We asked South Carolinians | AJ+: https://youtu.be/h2TPlxBIvOQ?si=ZiAjZqHoSDVyrJ6y

Visit The South - 10 Things That Will SHOCK You About The South USA - Wolters World: https://youtu.be/szbyA3Bic_w?si=q_h1M9H55qC8sk6h

What's Dating In Russia Like For Black People - Afro Russia TV: https://youtu.be/mjNfMft86kE?si=cz4OcviQDp21qlca

Racism in Russia is Tough - Agent Nesty: https://youtu.be/QhUFXrU75dA?si=0OJUQPQF7zzx1whv

When trying to love and work, clashes over values remind readers that what people are truly fighting about goes deeper than culture and goes right down to personality preferences, ethical preferences, and skill levels. People want to work with others where skills match comfortably and workers are cooperative. As soon as that becomes impossible, there is a realization that it often doesn't matter what country a person is living in or which cultures are involved. Clashes of preferences continue. "You’re coming here and you’re expecting that everybody’s Black, so I’m going to be OK,” Ms. Davis said. 'But then you get here and then you’re being 'othered' — viewed as different and separate...The 'othering' goes both ways. Some Ghanaians feel discrimination from Black Americans, said Ekua Otoo, 36, a Ghanaian in Accra. Black American communities there can be insular, she said, and their businesses often prefer to hire Black Americans, or Indians and Lebanese, for senior positions, while qualified Ghanaians are excluded or underpaid. 'If you’re leaving the U.S. to come to Ghana thinking about 'I’m coming to the motherland,' at least treat us right,' Ms. Otoo said."

Since people can gaslight and be defensive, the psychology ideal to treat people only according to their actions and behaviors, can be hard because you have to watch yourself all the time. When criticizing someone for their work, accuracy and fairness of the criticism is important, but it may not be taken that way by the employee, and if certain cultures are preferred, because work communication and training goes more smoothly, you end up more with a valu-ism that underlies what people feel as racism. All employees that feel daunted when they know they have to learn a new skill also have to watch if they are deflecting their negative emotions and blaming others. Because everyone has some values, including professed nihilists, who would protest if they were ever robbed and beaten, there is always a potential for conflict. This gets compounded by the fact that humans are social animals, and therefore influence and imitate. All humans in all cultures seduce, proselytize, convince, argue, debate, protest and demand cooperation and conformity. Clear communication about values and what is expected on the job has to be applied with fairness and no favoritism so that people can trust the environment will reward good work when it's done. Anything that goes into identity politics is destined for conflict and resentment. Of course, nepotism and cronyism is alive and well in all countries so the challenge continues on. The patterns can be found everywhere if you are willing to look, but those businesses that can learn to bridge the gap between cultures, who provide excellent training, flexible jobs, and fair treatment will likely end up with the highest ratings and be the most sought after by workers with the highest skills. Those with the lowest skills typically have to tolerate worse conditions until they are able to negotiate with their experience, and possibly trade-up into better work environments. Absurdity shadows all human endeavor and can't be eliminated completely.

Because the world is absurd in many ways, absurdity has to be included in philosophical thoughts about engagement with the world, and it can only be the world as it is. Albert Camus understood absurdity and its constant presence. "I leave Sisyphus at the foot of the mountain! One always finds one's burden again. But Sisyphus teaches the higher fidelity that negates the gods and raises rocks. He too concludes that all is well. This universe henceforth without a master seems to him neither sterile nor futile. Each atom of that stone, each mineral flake of that night-filled mountain, in itself forms a world. The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man's heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy."

The Secret of the Golden Flower - Thomas Cleary: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780062501936/

Daoist Meditation - Wu Jyh Cherng: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9781848192119/

The Lankavatara Sutra - Red Pine: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9781619020993/

The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up - Marie Kondo: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9781607747307/

Csikszentmihalyi, M. (2014). Intrinsic Motivation and Effective Teaching In Applications of Flow in Human Development and Education. Springer, Dordrecht.

Csikszentmihalyi, M. (2014). Toward a Psychology of Optimal Experience. Flow and the Foundations of Positive Psychology, 209–226.

Csikszentmihalyi, M. (1978). Attention and the Holistic Approach to Behavior. In: Pope, K.S., Singer, J.L. (eds) The Stream of Consciousness. Emotions, Personality, and Psychotherapy. Springer, Boston, MA.

The Pleasures and Sorrows of Work - Alain De Botton: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780771026034/

Robert Dubin, Joseph E. Champoux, Central life interests and job satisfaction, Organizational Behavior and Human Performance, Volume 18, Issue 2, 1977, Pages 366-377

The Myth of Sisyphus - Albert Camus: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780525564454/

Contemplative Practice: http://psychreviews.org/category/contemplativepractice/