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idkthisisjustforfanfic · 5 years

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two years too late, chapter t h r e e

You were sitting at your desk on Monday morning when the message came through. Alyssa’s name lit up your screen, the house emoji sat beside the small letters as your hand jerked forward to grab it out of habit.

Alyssa (10:21am): THERE’S A PHOTO OF US AND HARRY

Alyssa (10:21am): Can’t see our faces tho don’t worry

Alyssa (10:22am): Just the back of your head and my ear, really

Shit, shit, shit.

She’d attached the picture and sent it: your arm, your hand, your hair. Alyssa’s ear and jaw, Erica’s leather jacket and unmistakably, Harry’s shoulders and back. You looked it over again, studying the image as you pinched it to zoom in.

You couldn’t tell that was you. No way. Unless your mother or sister was looking, Jessie and Bryn might not even be able to tell. It was dark and the quality of the picture was poor but you could definitely see that you had a drink in your hand. You could also see that you were stood remarkably close to Harry.

Fuck.

You took a deep breath, hoping to steady your pulse and ignore the way your vision was blurry in the corners.

“Question!”

“Jesus!” You exclaimed, looking up quickly to see a startled Whitney with her hand on her chest--just as alarmed by your reaction as you’d been by her presence. “Sorry, hi.” You dropped your phone quickly, letting it crash down to your desk.

“Sorry, oh my god,” she let out a big breath, rebounding from the adrenaline as a laugh escaped her lips. “I was just hoping we could meet later. I didn’t mean to freak you out.”

“No, m’sorry--you just--proper scared me,” you said, leaning back in your chair and blinking a few times--your heart still catching up with your brain.

“Your performance review is overdue,” she said. “We were supposed to do it at the six month mark, but you know how things are,” she waved a hand to dismiss the timeline.

“Sure, yeah. After lunch?”

“Two-thirty? We can meet in my office.”

“I’ll come to you,” you nodded, offering confirmation before she turned to walk away.

You picked up your phone again quickly, new messages from Alyssa coming in faster than you could read them.

Alyssa (10:24am): OKAY just kidding there’s one of your face. Blurry though!!!!

Alyssa (10:24am): From down below. Someone must have taken it looking up to the balcony where we were?

Alyssa (10:25am): You would never know that was you

She was trying to reassure you, trying to keep your heart from beating out of your chest as all of the thoughts flooded through your brain like a tsunami, waves quick and forceful.

Okay, so it wasn’t like knowing Harry was the end of the world. You’d been doing that for nearly 13 years and you’d managed fine enough. The problem, as you saw it, was more along the lines that your employer and coworkers had no clue that someone your website wrote about frequently was recently spending his nights on your couch with a glass of wine in hand.

Something about that sounded weird, and you were sure that Whitney wouldn’t go for it.

You pulled up the new photo, holding the screen uncomfortably close to your face to study the grainy pixels. Of course--the one moment that he slung his arm around your shoulders was the one this person had chosen to capture.

Y/N L/N (10:26am): Where are these? Can we get the person to take them down?

Alyssa (10:26am): They came up on my instagram explore tab. Random fan accounts.

Y/N L/N (10:27am): Fuck.

Alyssa (10:27am): I don’t think you should worry. They’re so blurry you can’t even tell if you’re a man or woman.

Y/N L/N (10:28am): Great even better!

You dropped your phone into your desk drawer after telling Alyssa to keep an eye on the photos. She was right: they were blurry. You were hoping with everything in your soul that Carly was too busy to even check the internet today (unlikely, seeing as your job relied on that), or if she did, that she’d be too excited about the new gossip to even pause and consider the fact that the hair in the photo looked an awful lot like yours.

So you waited. You contemplated sneaking out to meet Alyssa for lunch, taking a look for yourself at the accounts that had uploaded the photos. You decided against it, though, when you realized that your absence might make you look even more suspicious. Flying under the radar as much as possible seemed like a good option.

You kept your head in your work: a list about the funniest memes about Christmas, a quick round up of the weekend’s best celebrity tweets. You heated up your lunch and ate at your desk, hoping to avoid Carly at all costs.

You were successful up until you slipped into the kitchen on your floor to fill up your water bottle, hoping to blend in to the late-lunch crowd. Carly stood with her back to you, but soon turned around, her festive red sweater made her hard to miss. Upon meeting eyes with her, you looked down to your watch, pretending as if you’d suddenly remembered a meeting you were late for.

You weren’t one to shy away from confrontation, but this one didn’t feel totally work appropriate.

“Haven’t seen you all day,” she said, pulling her lunch from the microwave before offering a smile. “Busy or what?”

“Swamped,” you lied, pushing your water bottle up to the cooler in defeat, the bracelets on your wrist clinking together. “Ate at my desk, been pretty productive, so s’all good.”

“Feels busy around here in general. Christmas and shit,” she shrugged. “There was breaking news this morning that Harry went out on a date this weekend. I don’t know if you saw it--pictures and everything,” she wiggled her eyebrows as if you’d bite at the bait.

You licked at your dry lips, a heat rising to your cheeks. “Really?”

She nodded, grabbing a napkin from the counter. “Can’t even tell who it is, probably some random model or something. I doubt it’s hard to find someone to sleep with when you’re Harry Styles, though, so--” she turned to head back towards her desk, calling over her shoulder. “Come find me later, we’ll grab a coffee and do edits together!”

You promised you would, thankful for the fact that she was an hour behind her target for the day and still hadn’t eaten. It gave you time to gain composure as you wove through cubes and conversations to make your way to Whitney’s corner office with sweeping city views.

A sunny and cold day on the other side of the glass windows reminded you that winter was here--the small amount of snow left reflected sunlight like a broken mirror on the ground. Whitney had a folder on her desk and waved you in when you knocked, cell phone up to her ear.

She ended the call and thanked you for making the time, telling you to shut the door behind you, affording privacy to your conversation about your numbers and pay and overall transition into The Scoop.

You told Whitney that you thought it was going well--you felt up to speed with the platform the website used, felt like you were staying on top of your category (even if it wasn’t your favorite). She complimented you on your ability to use humor in your stories and on social media platforms to enhance the mission of the website, she even said you’d been the second top writer for this quarter.

“Rarely happens with someone so new,” she smiled, leaning back in her chair as she crossed her legs. “But be real with me--are you liking it? What do you wish was different? Any big fears?”

You bit at your lip, contemplating whether or not to disclose your desire to cover more news. You didn’t want to seem ungrateful or entitled, but you also trusted Whitney to handle any feedback you threw her way. “I mean, I guess I’d be interested in doing some more long form stories. Editorials or something.”

She nodded, waiting to see if you had more to say. When you let your lips press back together in a thin line, she offered a small smile. “I’ll certainly keep that in mind,” she told you, her tone made it sound like she was letting you down easy. “Gabrielle does most of the editorial pieces and Carly handles a lot of the pop culture news stuff that comes up for the entertainment department.”

You nodded--you knew the hierarchy. Gabrielle had been here longer than both you and Carly combined. She was only a step or two below Whitney and she seemed to sniff out good stories like it was second nature. She almost never wrote a flop.

“Yeah, no, sorry, I don’t mean to sound ungrateful,” you said, already regretting the words that you’d let slip.

“You’re not ungrateful,” Whitney said. “You’re looking for more growth. I like that. I’ll certainly keep it in mind, Y/N.”

“I do have a random question,” you said suddenly, the four walls of Whitney’s office feeling like a safe enough place to play out a scenario of what ifs.

“Yeah?”

Whitney--as hip as she was--likely wasn’t paying attention to every waking detail of Harry’s life. You doubted she saw the photos and you figured you could be vague enough in your question.

“Has anyone here ever had a conflict of interest issue?”

“Conflict of interest?” Whitney spoke the phrase like she didn’t know what it meant. You knew she did, so you gave an example.

“Yeah, like, has anyone ever used their own tweets in a story or promoted a friend’s band or--I dunno, been friends with a celebrity that we cover?”

She let out a laugh, as if all of the examples were far fetched and unlikely. “I mean,” she shrugged. “Candace from beauty one time got in trouble downstairs for doing a whole write up on a makeup brand her sister was COO of,” she clenched her jaw and grimaced. “But no one up here--you’re all smarter than that.”

Right. Okay. So there was that.

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

“Oh, just curious,” you waved a hand in the air, letting a forced laugh out as you looked out the window. “Sounds like a shit show.”

“Yeah--I mean, she got in trouble, but they figured it out. Anything else? I’ve got all of your stuff to proof before I head out early for yoga.”

“Nope, all good on this end.” You stood and gathered your water bottle and notebook.

Whitney reopened her laptop and checked her phone. “Thanks for meeting with me, Y/N. We love you here and you’ve been a rockstar.”

You offered her a smile, appreciative of the praise and encouragement. Once she let her eyes fall back to her computer, you hurried over to your desk, reaching for your phone and praying that the photo hadn’t traveled any father.

You composed a quick message to Harry.

Y/N (3:17pm): Coming to yours when I’m out of work. We need to talk.

The one problem about going to Harry’s after work was that he wasn’t home. So instead of storming into his apartment like you’d imagined, you had to wait patiently in a strange hallway in a big office building in Midtown.

You checked your watch obsessively. You’d only been there for seven minutes so far, but it still felt like too long. You were rehearsing the words in your head, tiny fragments of an argument playing out before you even had the chance to tell him about the photos or the anxiety that came with them.

You had no clue where you were. He’d sent another pin of his location and told you to text him when you arrived. A man at the front desk swiped a card for you to enter and instructed you to head to the 49th floor. So here, in another indistinguishable hallway (this time without a neon green wall), you waited.

“Hi, hey,” his voice sounded from a doorway behind you, your body instinctively moving in the direction of his voice before you even locked eyes. “Everything okay, what’s wrong?”

His arms tried to envelope you, but before they could, you put a hand up to his chest. “We have to talk.”

“Okay,” he drew the syllables out, his head dipping to the side as he looked past your shoulder. “Come with me,” he took your hand and pulled you back towards where he came. Through a doorway, past a few people. A fitting, you realized. He was at some sort of wardrobe fitting.

People stirred at tables beside you, yellow measuring tapes draped around their necks and white chalk stained their fingertips. He offered a smile to one woman in particular, one who seemed to be more interested in your presence than the others. He pulled you towards the other side of the room, your palm sweaty from the touch of his skin and the swirling desire in your head--the kind you tried (but failed) to ignore.

Eventually you were in a back stairwell--one that was similar to the hiding spot you’d found last week at work. The door shut behind you, and Harry leaned his head out to ensure that no one was around to eavesdrop, he turned to offer you his full attention. “Alright, go.”

“Did you see the pictures of us?”

“Pictures?”

“Pictures.”

“No.”

You rolled your eyes and reached for your phone in your pocket, pulling up Alyssa’s message and opening the two attachments she’d sent. “These.” You flipped it around to let his eyes scan over them.

He hummed and took the phone in his hand, the other reaching to rub the back of his neck. “I take it you’re not happy about it.”

His eyes raised to meet yours, your voice faltering as you spoke. “I--no, I just--I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to work where I work and be photographed with you.”

“Because of your friend?”

Carly--he meant Carly.

“No, not because of Carly. Because of me. It’s a conflict of interest, Harry. I can’t be your friend and potentially have to write a list about the ten funniest things you’ve ever said in interviews!”

He cracked a smile at this, but it faded altogether when you squinted up at him.

“Alright,” he cleared his throat. “I mean, it’s blurry,” he brought your phone back to his face and inspected it more. “You can barely tell that’s you. If I didn’t know what you look like, I wouldn’t even guess.”

You swallowed, wondering if he ever studied your features like you did his. The dip in his top lip, the way his eyes crinkled at the sides when he laughed.

“What’s the big deal, anyway? We’ve been friends forever, a lot of people do know that, you know.”

You couldn’t help but pull a face at his words. Friends forever? You corrected him. “Friends who haven’t had regular contact for the last, like, six years. Haven’t spoken at all in the last two.”

He let a breath out, one that told you he was bothered or angry or something. “Because I thought that’s what you wanted!”

You took a step back from him, suddenly overwhelmed as a thousand questions burrowed their way into your mind. “Whatever--I don’t even want to,” you cut yourself off. You weren’t ready to dig up the details of December 29th or launch into a conversation regarding the untethering of your friend group. “I just--I can’t fuck this job up, it’s a really good job.”

“You’re not going to fuck it up, Smalls!” His words were harsh now despite the use of your nickname, his eyes wider than before as he tried to reassure you. “It’s just a photo. No one will know that’s you. We’ll just be careful.”

It didn’t feel that easy.

“I mean, it might get you more reads, y’know.” A laugh tumbled out of his mouth with ease, a complete lack of awareness of the weight his words held. You pulled your eyes up to look at him, a heat in your chest present that he hadn’t ever ignited before. At least, not in the angry sense.

“Are you implying that being friends with you will further my career and that I should be thankful for that?”

“No, I didn’t--I just mean that people love to read your stuff anyway. S’hilarious. If people knew that we were friends, that would make people really interested in you--more than they already are,” he tried to soften his words, flatten out the intention as if he hadn’t meant what he said.

You shook your head, your gaze on the cement floor as you wondered why you even answered his text four days prior. Now, as the sun tried to peek through the dirty sliver of a window in the stairwell, answering felt like it was a bad choice.

“I--okay, Harry--I’ll see you around,” you turned on one foot, hand on the doorknob before he could get in front of you.

Monday, December 11th

Harry S (11:34pm): I’m sorry about today. I wasn’t trying to be a dick.

Harry S (11:46pm): Sleep well

Tuesday, December 12th

Harry S (10:19am): What are you up to after work?

Friday, December 15th

Harry S (1:15pm): Alright. You’re mad. I get it. I was a dick.

Harry S (1:15pm): Can we please talk?

You always wished you were strong willed. You could be, in a lot of ways. Like the time you and Jessie took a painting class and you were complete shit. You spent hours researching the right brushes for the right types of paint and eventually, you figured it out. The summer heat back home turned sticky as you’d paint in your bedroom at night, a fan blowing sweet relief until you’d climb into cool sheets.

Or even the time you’d decided to stand up to Holly McAdams in Year 3 when she told everyone that you had cooties. The playground went silent when you called her a liar and told her to put her energy towards good instead of evil.

But when it came to Harry--you’d never been so lucky. He always had a charm about him that seemed to seep into your brain and turn it all to mush, tiny roots that wrapped around your neurons and seemed to rewire you entirely. Which is why, on Friday afternoon, you finally broke and called him on your commute home.

“Hi,” you said into the phone, holding onto the handrail in your subway car as it rounded a corner. The reception was shitty underground, but you committed yourself to the phone call and would recognize a dropped signal as a sign from the universe that it wasn’t meant to be.

“Hi,” he said.

You waited, unsure if he’d launch into an apology or let you take the first step. Silence.

“Sorry I’ve been ignoring you. I was busy at work and I fucked up a list and Whitney has been out sick--” you realized you were doing it. You were apologizing when you hadn’t done anything wrong. He’d been the one to fuck up and now you were apologizing? You back tracked. “And yeah, I mean, you were a dick, so.”

He laughed, the sound immediately easing some of the tension between you. “I get that. I’m sorry--I should have known that you’re not,” he paused. A woman beside you sneezed into her elbow, you inched away from her to avoid contamination, sandwiched between strangers. “You’re not impressed by the fame,” he spoke dramatically, your lips involuntarily twitching towards the sky--or, in your current situation, the ground above.

“I’m sure not. Never have been, never will be.”

“Are you out of work now?”

“Yeah.”

“What are you doing tonight?”

You let out a sigh, you’d been dreaming about it all day. “Nothing--I’m going to sit on my couch and eat a bowl of cereal and pray that I don’t catch whatever is going around the office. I already kind of have a sore throat and I’m not trying to be sick for Christmas.”

“Well,” he laughed. “I wish you the best with that, then.”

A tangle of disappointment in your gut when he didn’t ask you to hang out.

“Thanks. I’ll--uh--talk to you later?”

“Yeah, Smalls, talk to you later.”

You hung up, sliding your phone back into your pocket and shrinking into your coat for the remainder of the ride. When you climbed the twenty three steps to ground level at your stop, the sun had already sunk below the skyline, traces of light sneaking between the buildings on your block.

Alyssa had worked from home for the day, turning the living room into an office as she sat sprawled out on the couch. She’d also been coming down with something--her nose red and dry from all of her tissue use.

“Hi,” she greeted, pulling out her headphones and looking up at you when you came through the door, the room once again lit with the glow of Christmas lights. “How was work?”

“Fine, long, T-G-I-F,” you laughed. “How do you feel?”

“Somewhat better. Still crappy, though. How’s your throat?”

You dropped your purse to the floor and hung up your coat. “Worse than this morning. I talked to Harry though.”

She pulled her earbuds out and grinned up at you. “Was he so apologetic? I feel like he’d feel so guilty knowing he upset you--”

You shot her one of those looks: the kind that told her she was getting too wrapped up in his charm and fame and good looks.

She cleared her throat. “But he was a dick so he should feel guilty.”

You kicked your shoes off, the leather of your boots falling against the wood floor before you settled into the couch. “He was apologetic--but it was quick. Who knows when I’ll see him next, maybe when we’re home.”

Alyssa bit her tongue--you could see that she had something to say but you didn’t press it, unsure if you had the emotional energy for a conversation about why being friends with Harry again wasn’t the smartest idea.

She looked back to her screen, finishing up a few emails as you sunk into the couch, your eyes glued to your phone as you read through comments on the picture of you and Harry.

I bet she’s just a friend--they look totally platonic.

HE’S TOTALLY DATING SOMEONE!

Skjdhfkjdshfkjdhk!!!!

The picture is way too fucking grainy how are we supposed to sleuth this one out?!

Alyssa sighed and closed her laptop. “What do you want for dinner?”

“Ugh,” you let out a groan, exiting out of instagram quickly to avoid showing her the things people were saying. If you had to guess, you’d say that Alyssa had a similar nightly ritual over the past few days. Wash her face, brush her teeth, climb into bed and read what strangers were saying about you online.

The only good thing, really, was that people didn’t know it was you.

“I’m not in the mood to cook,” you said.

As soon as the words left your mouth, your phone buzzed on the coffee table, the same obnoxious picture of Harry in an apron lighting up the screen as you both brought yours eyes down to the buzzing technology, then back up to each other.

“Answer it,” she said excitedly, her lips curling towards the ceiling.

You shot her a look as you reached for it. “Not on the first ring--can’t seem too eager.”

“As if you’re not eager,” she teased, returned the eye roll pleasantry, pulling a laugh from you as you answered the call.

“Hi,” you said quickly, pressing the speaker phone button and holding it in the air between the two of you on the couch.

“Hey--I’m following protocol and giving you a warning that I’ll be over in like--eh--four minutes.”

“What?” You asked. “Why?”

Alyssa looked around the room nervously, taking an inventory of the items that were hers. She sprung into action quickly, trying to declutter her home-office--notebooks, sharpies, her glasses and tissues were spread out around the living room space.

“I’ve got food. Figured you wouldn’t want to cook if you weren’t feeling well.”

Alyssa stopped dead in her tracks, turning to you with her hands over her heart and lips in a lovestruck frown, completely enchanted by his words. You lifted your middle finger in her direction before turning towards the back of the sofa. Alyssa headed into her bedroom.

“You don’t have to do that, I mean--thank you, obviously, but, I totally get it if you’re busy.”

“M’not,” he said simply. “Stuff is dying down now anyway since we’re leaving soon.” You noticed his pronoun choice, casually dropped into the sentence as he kept talking. “I’ll wait until the coast is clear, alright? Just buzz me in when I text you.”

“Yeah,” you said. “Alright.”

Alyssa popped back into the room when she heard you hang up, her brows raised suggestively.

“What?” You asked, your tone slightly defensive as she pulled her head through the neck of her sweatshirt.

“Just, interesting, is all. Awfully sweet of him.”

You stood from the couch, watching as she bent over once more to gather more of her belongings from the area rug below. “Oh come off it,” you said.

She pulled a face, confused by your slang as she reached for a pen that had wandered beneath the coffee table.

“S’not a big deal,” you edited your words so she’d understand. “We’re friends.”

She hummed in disagreement, you trailed behind her towards her bedroom, socked feet gliding along the hard wood. Alyssa’s room was dark, the beige walls covered in posters of bands and movies. Her bed was unmade and the floor was littered in clothing of days past.

You leaned against the doorframe. “How could you think we’re anything more than that after hearing the full story of what happened that night?”

She shrugged nonchalantly, giving you a dismissive look. “S’been a while, things change. You don’t just bring food to your sick friend.”

“Sure you do,” you narrowed your eyes at her. “That’s exactly what friends do, Lyss.”

She picked up a shirt from the floor and folded it into quarters. “Just seems like there’s always been chemistry. One shitty night--as embarrassing as it was--doesn’t mean there’s not chemistry.”

You thought on her words, careful to not let them settle too deep in your heart. They floated in the air in front of you, vanishing altogether when an electric buzz leaked through the intercom by the door.

You ran over--quick to make sure he could sneak in undetected--and held a thumb to the button to grant him entrance.

Seventy-three seconds until there was a knock on the door, a pizza in his hand, and a bottle of wine pulled from the shelf in the kitchen. Alyssa--who was never one to turn down some Pinot Noir--had chosen the nicest bottle you had. A gift from her mother when she got a promotion.

Eventually, the three of you were sat around the coffee table, throw pillows serving as seats as you reached for second slices. Music drifted from the small speaker on the bookshelf, the scene similar to that of last weekend, except this time Alyssa was here. It was funny how things with Harry could feel exactly the same as they’d once been, yet entirely different in the same breath.

“Did she ever tell you about the time that we stayed up all night at Jessie’s house when we were fourteen because of some stupid internet challenge?”

Alyssa pulled a smile, her eyes darting over to me quickly. “Of course she didn’t.”

“S’cause it was stupid. You’re the one who barely made it. Everyone else was fine but when five AM came you were seriously dragging.”

He contorted his face into one of mock-offense. “Excuse me for having good sleep hygiene and a healthy need for some shut-eye.”

“You guys were allowed to have co-ed sleepovers at fourteen?” Alyssa asked, holding a hand up in student fashion. She folded her pizza in half, a boat of cheese and grease and pepperoni.

You let out a laugh, knowing that Harry’d want to explain the mastermind plan that he and Adam had come up with nearly ten years ago.

“So we did this thing, where the girls would tell their mums that they were at someone’s house. So they’d say they were at Bryn’s, but Bryn would say she was at Y/N’s,” he smiled in your direction--the adrenaline of lying to your parents came back as a small wave, less exciting than in times past but still enough to keep a grin plastered to your face.

“And the guys would do the same. We always said we were at Adam’s though--and I dunno what Adam would say cause his parents never asked any questions. So then we’d go to Jessie’s because her parents were always away for work, and--yeah, madness would ensue.”

“S’where we first drank, pretty sure that’s where Adam finally called Sophie Kneeland and asked her out over the phone.”

“S’also where Smalls blacked out the first time when we were fifteen or sixteen,” he let out a laugh and turned to Alyssa.

Her eyes went wide as she folded her legs beneath her. Your stomach dropped though, seeing as now didn’t feel like a good time to recount all the times you’d done stupid things when you were drunk. You could probably spend hours on that topic alone.

“Okay--alright, anyway,” you said, clearing your throat quickly. A car horn beeped outside, momentarily shattering the safety of the cozy room.

“Hey, also,” Harry wiped at his mouth with a napkin and pointed a finger at your roommate. “Did you appreciate my warning--a whole five minutes!”

“Four,” you said, his eyes rolling in response to your correction.

“Better than zero,” Alyssa nodded, taking a sip of wine. “Maybe we can work you all the way up to asking before you show up,” she teased.

Harry frowned at this. A dimple appeared in his cheek and he looked over to you quickly. “I brought food--” his gaze drifted back to Alyssa. “And enough for you, if you forgot.”

“You should have seen her cleaning up all her shit in here,” you laughed. “Notebooks every where, like a bomb went off.”

“I was working,” she defended. “What did you do today, Harry?”

“Hmm,” he thought aloud. “Woke up at eight--went to the gym. Showered and finalized the set list for the next leg of tour. Had a meeting with my manager and PR team about what’s coming up after the holidays. Lunch, then I had to go back to a fitting for more wardrobe stuff. Talked with Erica about the flight home, side note,” he looked to you. “Then I got your call and decided to come here.”

You were both quiet for a second--Alyssa had been challenging him, her assumption that he’d had a quiet day that couldn’t have nearly been as busy as hers. He took a deep breath and took a swig of wine.

You knew that he was busy--you’d always assumed that being famous came with plenty of downfalls and responsibilities, but hearing them all listed out in succession without a breath in between made induced a wave of guilt to pass through your veins.

Of course it was hard for him to keep in touch, if even his slower days looked like that.

“But about the flight,” he pointed a finger at you and then set his wine glass down. “Two tickets on the red eye for the 20th. I’d say we could charter something but first class on the big planes is always really nice. They give you a free eye patch.”

“Eye patch?” Alyssa asked, her tone drifting up in confusion.

“The ones you sleep with.”

“Eye mask,” you nodded.

“Oh whatever, you knew what I meant,” Harry squinted his eyes and reached for the bottle for a refill.

“What do you mean a big plane, though? How big are we talking?”

“The double deckers--they have little cubbies in first class. Little doors and everything--super private, which is nice.”

“You fly on public planes?” Another question from Alyssa--your personal peanut gallery--as you watched Harry take the stopper out of the bottle before pouring more into his glass.

“Yeah--s’better for the environment.”

Alyssa’s eyes went wide and she got that same look when he’d said he was bringing food--her brain and heart melting inside her, almost spilling out onto the oriental rug.

“Alyssa,” you said her name quickly as you stood from your orange and yellow throw pillow seat. “Want to help me with something in the kitchen?”

“What? What do you need help with?”

“Uh,” you looked around the room, trying to think on your feet. “The leftovers--the pizza.”

Harry, sat on the floor between the two of you, looked up. “I can help.”

“No.” You said quickly. “You stay. Pick a new playlist,” you instructed, hoping that a responsibility would keep him occupied. You gave Alyssa a prompting look, causing her to reluctantly stand and follow you around the corner to the kitchen.

“Can you not with the faces?” You asked, turning around once you were shielded by the wall between the two rooms. “Any time he says something relatively endearing you look like you’re about to combust or orgasm or something.”

“If I was about to orgasm, you’d know it,” she smirked, her voice low and sultry as you rolled your eyes. You’d grabbed the pizza on your way, so you reached into a drawer for aluminum foil and then tossed the box into the garbage.

“You get my point.”

“I do--but come on, Y/N! He’s literally acting like your boyfriend! Buying you a plane ticket even though you already have one? Bringing you dinner because you mentioned in passing that you weren’t feeling well? And now he’s climate conscious, too?!”

You passed her the foil-wrapped pizza and she put it into the fridge. A shrug of your shoulders, as if to dilute the air around you.

“He’s alright,” you said, the words an act of self-defense, an antidote for the love potion Alyssa was verbally concocting.

She rolled her eyes when she turned around to face you. “Relax, will you? It’s alright to be into him.”

“No it’s not, Alyssa,” you said, your voice more firm now. “You don’t know him, okay? You don’t know what happened back then and the way our friendship was and--just, leave it alone, alright?”

She paused, her eyes scanning your face, both of you staring at each other in silence. The kitchen clock ticked on the wall, seconds scattered through the room.

Harry’s voice floated above the music from the other room, “some classic Christmas tunes, yeah?”

So you left it at that. There was no need to defend yourself more than you already had, the reasons stacking high as to why shouldn’t go down this road. Harry was on two feet in the living room, swaying back and forth to the music as Alyssa followed you back to the couch.

You poured yourself another glass of wine, watching as he playfully took Alyssa’s hand, spinning her into his side as they waltzed in circles around the coffee table.

You pulled your carryon closer to your body, wishing you could absorb it into your being as you forced your way past people already in line. Sorry, excuse me, sorry, thanks, gotta get by.

The airport was busier than you expected. Your mum had told you on the phone that the afternoon would be the worst time of day, a wave of relief washing over you when you confirmed that Harry had booked the red eye. That relief vanished altogether when you stepped foot into the bustling airport, children running, intercoms beeping.

Your passport was in your hand, the ticket slipped between pages filled with colorful stamps. An elbow into your stomach, you hiked the bag up your shoulder more.

“I’m so sorry, hi, name is Y/N L/N, I was supposed to board already, uh--my friend is already seated I think.”

The woman at the desk looked at you with an unimpressed stare, her fingers clicking on the keyboard as she held a hand out. You assumed she wanted your ticket, so you thumbed it out of the booklet and slapped it down.

Her eyes scanned the paper before the computer did, when it beeped, the expression on her face changed. “Oh, Miss L/N,” she smiled up at you. “No worries, we can take you to your seat right now.”

“Oh, I can, I’ll just take myself,” you said awkwardly, looking around to see who else she was referring to. Other gate workers were nearby, clad in the traditional British Airways uniforms as the airport continued to buzz with Christmas cheer. Apparently flying first class had its perks.

And you would have already been seated if you’d just agreed to travel to the airport with Harry, but you had plenty of things to tie up at work before heading out for a whopping 12 days. It wasn’t typical to take so much time off in a role like yours, but Whitney was feeling generous and you’d agreed to work a few days remotely.

So instead of sitting in the back of the same black Chevy Suburban with Roger narrating the drive, you’d crammed your suitcase into the trunk of an Uber and hoped that the traffic out to Long Island wasn’t impossible.

It was.

A man with a friendly smile took your bag from your shoulder, leading you around the counter and on to the jet way, veering left at the fork. The temperature shifted as you moved farther from the structure of the airport--the winter New York night seeping in through the cracks of the beige tunnel walls. Posters of happy travelers and airport workers smiled down on you, to fly, to serve. Their eyes watched you pad down the dull gray carpet towards the plane.

Smiles from flight attendants when you crossed the threshold, greeting you by name as your companion put an arm out, urging you in before him.

The interior of the plane was dimly lit a calming blue--the windows shaded electronically, making them appear to be black eyes into the night. You passed a galley stocked with coffee, tea, British Airways water bottles, heading down an aisle past cushioned seats--ones much nicer than the economy class you were used to flying. You’d assumed this was your section--each seat had armrests big enough for giants--but you passed through a curtain to find a section of small cubicles, not much different than your office.

One on each side, two in the middle.

“Had to give up the window for you,” you heard a voice sound from two rows ahead. A dimpled smile looked your way, when you met his gaze, you shook your head.

“This is incredible,” you looked around, taking in the sight of other suited men and bejeweled women settling in for the trip. “I didn’t even know shit like this existed.”

The man set the bag down on your seat, disappearing without a trace as Harry handed you something wrapped in plastic. “Your eye mask,” he delivered it with two hands, bowing his head to pull a giggle from your lips.

“Seriously,” you took it from him and let out a huff as you pushed the bag to the floor, slumping into the extra-roomy chair. “This is absurd. The traffic was terrible and I almost thought they wouldn’t let me on.”

“Shoulda come with me,” he said simply, his tone almost melodic. “The club they let you wait in is even better.”

You looked around again, surprised that Harry was able to exist in peace in front of so many strangers. “I can’t believe you fly on these--you don’t get mobbed?”

He handed you a packaged piece of chocolate from a small cubby in the wall in front of your chairs. A flat screen stared back at you, your fingers tugging at the wrapper before plopping the candy into your mouth automatically.

“Not really--these people are all too busy with their own shit,” he motioned around the room, both of your eyes landing on a man who was animatedly speaking into his cell phone. “A few pictures, maybe. If we’re lucky we’ll sleep.”

You nodded, content for a moment to just catch your breath, take in the surroundings of first class, and just be. Harry reminded you of the plans you’d set with your friends: a reunion at the Red Lion on the 23rd. It’d be the six of you for sure, but there’d likely be others who you’d all invite--running into other classmates at Sainsbury’s or Costa wasn’t unheard of.

You’d done the same thing in years past--your entire class heading for drinks and catch up conversations when everyone was back in town. The only difference was that this time, Harry would be tagging along.

If anything, you were more nervous about the six of you being back together than you were about seeing people like Maddie Winslow or even Kenny Tilley. None of them knew about that night. Luckily--as obnoxious and outlandish as they could be--Jessie, Adam, Jake, and Bryn had managed to keep their mouths shut despite knowing the ins and outs of what had happened.

Which, when you thought about it, meant Harry had, too. He hadn’t told anyone about the things you’d said or done. He didn’t rub it in your face or try to embarrass you in front of anyone else. The details of December 29th, 2015, would hopefully stay between the six of you for a long time to come.

After a good fifteen minutes on the runway, the plane was airborne. Estimated flight time six hours and thirty-five minutes, if we’re lucky, the captain said. You told Harry about your week and the things you’d rushed through this afternoon to leave work before 4pm. He laughed about the traffic and poked you in the shoulder when you rolled your eyes at him.

Thirty minutes later he turned to look at you, a strand of hair dipping down to his forehead.

“Smalls,” he said quietly.

“Hmm?” You turned to look at him, mid-chapstick application.

“I’m glad we’re hanging out.”

You stared at him for a second, your face tingly and hot when his lips twitched up into a smile. You nodded, broke eye contact, and capped your chapstick. “Mhm, yeah, me too.”

“Smalls,” he said it again, this time you looked at him more seriously.

“What?”

“Can we talk about it?”

You could have sworn the world went silent--the hum of the plane’s four engines suddenly muted as he stared back at you with emerald eyes.

Somewhere in the world there were ocean waves so high they could knock a boat off course. There were rainforests and mountains and deserts so dry they made the airplane cabin feel humid. You wished, as you sat next to him, miles of space between your feet and the ground, that you could be anywhere but here.

You opened your mouth to speak, words escaping you. You shook your head.

“Y/N, I just--”

“No,” you said. “Forget it. We both said we would forget it.”

He licked his lips, quiet for a second as he dropped his gaze to the carpeted floor. You stood up quickly, hoping an escape to the bathroom would place air and time between the two of you. You were stuck, though. You pushed the button twice that was meant to open the sliding door out of your tiny space--a human height shield from the other passengers.

You pressed it again, more frustrated each time your finger met the hard plastic.

“Here,” he said behind you, reaching past you to press the button right beside it. “You were pressing close.”

“Right.”

The door slid open, a flight attendant offered you a smile as she waited for you to exit in front of her. Down the hall, into the bathroom--much bigger than economy. A full length mirror, a toilet that actually resembled a toilet.

The door shut and latched behind you. Silence. You couldn’t talk about it with him. That would be more embarrassing than the night itself. What were you supposed to say? I’m sorry? I didn’t mean it? I did mean it? You’d said all of those things before--in quick succession and with a heartbeat so fast you could have passed out.

A knock on the door. One second, you called out, turning the water on for a moment as if to make it sound like you were doing something other than panicking. You brushed past the stranger on the outside, offering an apologetic smile before heading back to your seat. When you got back, Harry had headphones in and a movie on the screen in front of him.

Thank god.

He smiled at you subtly, leaning forward to offer you a glass of champagne--someone must had dropped them off while you were losing your shit in the bathroom. You took it from him without a word, taking a sip as he took one earbud out of his ear and offered it to you. You pushed it into place and leaned back in the chair, still trying to catch your breath, grateful for the fact that he dropped it.

You didn’t need the whole plane ride to be awkward. If there was ever to be a moment for the two of you to talk about the ghosts of Christmas past, literally, it wasn’t right now. The trip would be nice with a movie and a nap--free chocolates and eye masks, too.

And besides, champagne tasted better at thirty thousand feet.

here’s what first class looks like for Harry and Y/N

read the other parts here

AN: big thanks to those of you reading big thanks for all of the messages!!! be sure to let me know what you think? Anyone want to take a guess as to what happened on 12/29/15?

tag list: @clorenafila @ainsleesolareclipse @castawaycths @harryspirate @wanderlustiing @ursamajor603 @thurhomish @omgsharry @jdcharliewhiskey @stepping-into-the-light @rachkon @jdcharliewhiskey @sad-little-asshole @ainsleesolareclipse @clorenafila @shawnsblue @gendryia @g0bl1nqueen @laula843 @pinkpolaroidgirl @4592222 @flooome @craic-head-horan @a-woman-without-a-plan @awomanindeniall @shaw-nm @staceystoleyourheart

#harry styles fiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fan fiction #harry styles writing #1dff #harry styles story #@harry styles writing #harry styles blurb #harry styles imagines #harry styles fic au #harry styles fic #harry styles writings #harry styles masterlist #harry styles x reader #harry x reader #harry styles reader insert #tytl #two years too late

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daddymendes · 5 years

Text

Surprise (Shawn Mendes x Reader)

*In this you’re Brian’s sister*

*3rd person’s POV*

(Y/N) was currently rummaging through her clothes as she was pack her suitcase for a trip. You see, (Y/N) boyfriend, Shawn, was currently on tour for 4 months now and (Y/N) started to miss him dearly. So she took matters into her own hands and planned a surprise visit to her boyfriend.

So she contacted her brother, Brian and Shawn’s bandmate, Geoff. Together they planned how she was gonna surprise Shawn. The plan was for (Y/N) to come to Italy (where Shawn was at that time) and surprise him while he was perfroming a song on stage infront of all her fans.

Within the next few minutes, she had everything she needed packed up in the now closed suitcase.

*(Y/N)’s POV*

Once I was done packing, I went to my bathroom to change into the clothes I would wear to the airport.

I changed into baby blue jeans and one of Shawn’s grey hoodie that I stole from his suitcase before tour.

Once I was done packing all my stuff, I grabbed my handbag which contained my laptop, laptop charger, my phone charger, spare clothes, chewing gum and snacks.

I grabbed my suitcase, rolled it down the stairs and out the door and packed it into my car. I locked the house door before climbing into my car and pulling out of the driveway.

The ride to the airport was quiet with the faint sound of the radio playing in the background. Suddenly one of Shawn’s songs came on and I immediately put the volume up. I felt something warm in my chest. I always feel like this whenever I hear Shawn’s songs on the radio. To think that, that is the same kid that sat in his bedroom doing covers on vine is crazy.

The car ride went by pretty fast as soon after, I found myself checking my suitcase in and already passed security and was now waiting for my flight to be called.

I decided to call Brian to update him on the plan. I texted him asking if Shawn was with him and if yes, he should go to another room so that I could call him.

A few minutes later, I got a facetime call incoming from Brian. I accepted the call and Brian’s face popped up along with Geoff in the background.

“Hey! I’m at the airport waiting for my flight right now” I said

“Nice. We’ve just finished practice and your boyfriend is looking pretty sad right now” Geoff said

“Awe bless him! Let’s hope our little surprise will brighten his mood a little” I said

“I’m sure it will. He’s whipped for you” Brian said

We all laughed and continued talking for a bit more until my flight was called. We said our goodbyes and see you later and ended the call.

I grabbed my stuff before heading towards my boarding gate. I showed the lady my passport and boarding pass before I was allowed to get in.

I walked down the tunnel to the plane before I found my seat that was next to the hublot. I placed my bag under the seat in front of me before I connected my earphones to my phone and listened to my music.

For the next few minutes, the plane started moving from it’s parked space towards the runway. At this point I just blanked out and within the next few minutes I was passed out.

*Few hours later*

I was woken up by the plane shaking like hell. I opened my eyes an looked out the hublot and I realised that we were landing. Once the plane hit the Italian ground, I grabbed my stuff and headed to the baggage belt.

Whilst waiting, I took out my phone and texted Brian saying that I arrived. He replied that he had a car waiting for me outside.

Once I got my luggage I headed out to the pick up area where I spotted a man standing there with a sign with my name on it. I walked towards him and greeted him. He turned out to be pretty friendly.

He grabbed my luggage and headed out to the parking lot where a back SUV was waiting there. He placed my luggage in the trunk and I climbed on the backseat. He climbed into the drivers seat and started heading out.

*Few minutes later*

The car pulled my to a hotel and I climbed out. I thanked the driver and grabbed my luggage. I walked into the hotel to be greeted my cold AC air. I looked around and spotted Brian sitting in the lobby area waiting for something.

Once he noticed me, he walked towards me with a smile.

“Hey lil sis” He greeted and hugged me

“Hey big bro” I said back

“We gotta get your to your floor before Shawn arrives” He said grabbing my luggage

“When is he supposed to be here?” I asked walking besides him

“Anytime soon. We just have time to get you hidden” He said

We entered a glass elevator that had a view on the lobby. As the elevator started going up, that’s when we saw Shawn walk in with the rest of his crew. But luckily he didn’t look into the elevator and I passed unnoticed.

The elevator doors opened and revealed on of th emany floors in the hotel. Brian walked ahead as I followed behind him.

“The only problem is that you’re on the same floor as all of us. So be careful not to get caught” Brian said as he opened a room door

“After you” Brian said as he steped out of the door way

I walked into the door way and walked through the door.

“You’ll just stay here for a few hours before you surprise Shawn during the concert” Brian said sitting down in the office chair.

I sat down opposite of him, on the bed.

“So, how’s it been?” I asked reffering to the tour

“It’s been great. Good vibes all along. Great people too!” He said

“I missed Teddy so much. I gotta see her as soon as possible” I said

“Oh trust me, she missed you too” He said

We kept on talking about anything that came up in our minds until it was time for Shawn and the team to head out to the stadium where the concert would take place. And Brian had to go along with them because he technically was part of teh team now.

So I was left alone for about an hour and I decided to change out of my clothes into cleaner clothes before Brian called me to tell me that there was a car downstairs waiting for me.

I walked out of my room to the lobby and I greeted the driver. I climbed in and he immediately started driving towards the venue. When we arrived, before I walked towards the venue, I called Brian saying that I was gonna walk in.

As I ended the call, I thanked the driver and walked to the backdoor. As I entered, I was greeted by Brian. I quickly pulled me towards a room afr away from all the commotion.

“That’s the only place you can stay in until Shawn goes on” Brian said

“Okay, that’s fine. It’s just a few minutes” I said and shrugged and sat down on a random box

“BTW can you get Teddy to come here? Don’t tell her I’m here tho” I said

“Sure. Be right back!” He said and walked out of the room

I waited for less than 2 minutes before the door opened and revealed Teddy. She took a glance at me before her face turned into pure shock.

“OMG! YOU’RE HERE!” She screamed but I shushed her before she caught the attention of anyone else

“Shhh! Shawn doesn’t know yet! I’m planning on surpirising him” I said

“Awe you guys are the cutest!” She sqealed

Teddy and I kept talking until we heard Shawn’s entrance song. We then decided that it was safe to get out of the small room and so we did.

Teddy lead me towards the wings where everyone was stading, watching Shawn’s performance.

Once they realised I was here they all greeted me.

“Heyy! You made it!” Geoff said

“Finally! I’m glad all the whining is gonna stop!” Andrew said and sigh

“Whining?” I asked

“Yeah your boyfriend kept going on about how he missed you and everytime you wouldn’t answer his calls he would always be in a bad mood. Always being down, sulky but I’m glad It’s gonna be over soon!” He added

“Oh wow. I didn’t expect that from him” I said

“So when are you gonna surprise him?” Geoff asked

“Last song maybe?” I said unsure

“Yeah sure. That’s ‘If I can’t have you’ which I know you love” Geoff said

“Oh my god yay!” I exclaimed

During the whole concert we kept on dancing and singing along with Shawn and the fans.

When the time finally came, Shawn was introducing his last song, ‘In my blood’ and I couldn’t help but feel anxious.

“Tell me when to go on” I said to Geoff

“Sure” He replied

I let most of the song pass and we were now at the last chorus of the song.

Geoff made a sign to me that I should now step on and I did. Shawn was forward at the edge of the stage, close to the fans.

I truned my head to the right and saw Zubin that looked at me shocked. I chuckled at his expression and greeted him with a head sign and placed my pointer finger to my lips in a ‘shhh’ sign. He nodded and I walked froward.

I slowly approached Shawn and as some fans noticed my presence, they screamed out even louder if that was even possible. I noticed how Shawn slightly looked confused but continued on.

When I was right behind him, I innocently tapped on his shoulder. He confusedly looked over his shoulder to see who was behind him and as soon as his eyes met mine his jaw fell to the floor.

He swung his guitar onto his back, picked me up and hugged me. I squealed as I didn’t expect him to do such thing.

“Oh my god! I can’t believe this! You’re here!” Shawn said

“Yes Shawn I’m here and I’m staying for the rest of the tour!” I said

“Couldn’t be better!” Shawn said

We kept staring into each others eyes simultaneously forgetting about the thousand of fans watching.

And they soon started chanting “KISS! KISS! KISS!”

We both turned our heas towards them and smiled to each other.

“Guess we gotta give the fans what they want” Shawn said with a smirk

I smiled at him, leaned in and soon enough our lips met and we could here the fans going wild!

In the end it was all worth it. I was so happy to be back in Shawn’s arms and so excited for the rest of the tour. I could tell that we would make many more happy memories!

63 notes · View notes

guccitaehyung · 5 years

Text

Surprise (Shawn Mendes x Reader)

*In this you’re Brian’s sister*

*3rd person’s POV*

Within the next few minutes, she had everything she needed packed up in the now closed suitcase.

*(Y/N)'s POV*

Once I was done packing, I went to my bathroom to change into the clothes I would wear to the airport.

I changed into baby blue jeans and one of Shawn's grey hoodie that I stole from his suitcase before tour.

Once I was done packing all my stuff, I grabbed my handbag which contained my laptop, laptop charger, my phone charger, spare clothes, chewing gum and snacks.

I grabbed my suitcase, rolled it down the stairs and out the door and packed it into my car. I locked the house door before climbing into my car and pulling out of the driveway.

The ride to the airport was quiet with the faint sound of the radio playing in the background. Suddenly one of Shawn's songs came on and I immediately put the volume up. I felt something warm in my chest. I always feel like this whenever I hear Shawn's songs on the radio. To think that, that is the same kid that sat in his bedroom doing covers on vine is crazy.

The car ride went by pretty fast as soon after, I found myself checking my suitcase in and already passed security and was now waiting for my flight to be called.

I decided to call Brian to update him on the plan. I texted him asking if Shawn was with him and if yes, he should go to another room so that I could call him.

A few minutes later, I got a facetime call incoming from Brian. I accepted the call and Brian's face popped up along with Geoff in the background.

"Hey! I'm at the airport waiting for my flight right now" I said

"Nice. We've just finished practice and your boyfriend is looking pretty sad right now" Geoff said

"Awe bless him! Let's hope our little surprise will brighten his mood a little" I said

"I'm sure it will. He's whipped for you" Brian said

We all laughed and continued talking for a bit more until my flight was called. We said our goodbyes and see you later and ended the call.

I grabbed my stuff before heading towards my boarding gate. I showed the lady my passport and boarding pass before I was allowed to get in.

For the next few minutes, the plane started moving from it's parked space towards the runway. At this point I just blanked out and within the next few minutes I was passed out.

*Few hours later*

Whilst waiting, I took out my phone and texted Brian saying that I arrived. He replied that he had a car waiting for me outside.

Once I got my luggage I headed out to the pick up area where I spotted a man standing there with a sign with my name on it. I walked towards him and greeted him. He turned out to be pretty friendly.

*Few minutes later*

Once he noticed me, he walked towards me with a smile.

"Hey lil sis" He greeted and hugged me

"Hey big bro" I said back

"We gotta get your to your floor before Shawn arrives" He said grabbing my luggage

"When is he supposed to be here?" I asked walking besides him

"Anytime soon. We just have time to get you hidden" He said

We entered a glass elevator that had a view on the lobby. As the elevator started going up, that's when we saw Shawn walk in with the rest of his crew. But luckily he didn't look into the elevator and I passed unnoticed.

The elevator doors opened and revealed on of th emany floors in the hotel. Brian walked ahead as I followed behind him.

“The only problem is that you’re on the same floor as all of us. So be careful not to get caught” Brian said as he opened a room door

“After you” Brian said as he steped out of the door way

I walked into the door way and walked through the door.

“You’ll just stay here for a few hours before you surprise Shawn during the concert” Brian said sitting down in the office chair.

I sat down opposite of him, on the bed.

“So, how’s it been?” I asked reffering to the tour

“It’s been great. Good vibes all along. Great people too!” He said

“I missed Teddy so much. I gotta see her as soon as possible” I said

“Oh trust me, she missed you too” He said

So I was left alone for about an hour and I decided to change out of my clothes into cleaner clothes before Brian called me to tell me that there was a car downstairs waiting for me.

As I ended the call, I thanked the driver and walked to the backdoor. As I entered, I was greeted by Brian. I quickly pulled me towards a room afr away from all the commotion.

“That’s the only place you can stay in until Shawn goes on” Brian said

“Okay, that’s fine. It’s just a few minutes” I said and shrugged and sat down on a random box

“BTW can you get Teddy to come here? Don’t tell her I’m here tho” I said

“Sure. Be right back!” He said and walked out of the room

I waited for less than 2 minutes before the door opened and revealed Teddy. She took a glance at me before her face turned into pure shock.

“OMG! YOU’RE HERE!” She screamed but I shushed her before she caught the attention of anyone else

“Shhh! Shawn doesn’t know yet! I’m planning on surpirising him” I said

“Awe you guys are the cutest!” She sqealed

Teddy and I kept talking until we heard Shawn’s entrance song. We then decided that it was safe to get out of the small room and so we did.

Teddy lead me towards the wings where everyone was stading, watching Shawn’s performance.

Once they realised I was here they all greeted me.

“Heyy! You made it!” Geoff said

“Finally! I’m glad all the whining is gonna stop!” Andrew said and sigh

“Whining?” I asked

“Oh wow. I didn’t expect that from him” I said

“So when are you gonna surprise him?” Geoff asked

“Last song maybe?” I said unsure

“Yeah sure. That’s ‘If I can’t have you’ which I know you love” Geoff said

“Oh my god yay!” I exclaimed

During the whole concert we kept on dancing and singing along with Shawn and the fans.

When the time finally came, Shawn was introducing his last song, ‘In my blood’ and I couldn’t help but feel anxious.

“Tell me when to go on” I said to Geoff

“Sure” He replied

I let most of the song pass and we were now at the last chorus of the song.

Geoff made a sign to me that I should now step on and I did. Shawn was forward at the edge of the stage, close to the fans.

I slowly approached Shawn and as some fans noticed my presence, they screamed out even louder if that was even possible. I noticed how Shawn slightly looked confused but continued on.

When I was right behind him, I innocently tapped on his shoulder. He confusedly looked over his shoulder to see who was behind him and as soon as his eyes met mine his jaw fell to the floor.

He swung his guitar onto his back, picked me up and hugged me. I squealed as I didn’t expect him to do such thing.

“Oh my god! I can’t believe this! You’re here!” Shawn said

“Yes Shawn I’m here and I’m staying for the rest of the tour!” I said

“Couldn’t be better!” Shawn said

We kept staring into each others eyes simultaneously forgetting about the thousand of fans watching.

And they soon started chanting “KISS! KISS! KISS!”

We both turned our heas towards them and smiled to each other.

“Guess we gotta give the fans what they want” Shawn said with a smirk

I smiled at him, leaned in and soon enough our lips met and we could here the fans going wild!

In the end it was all worth it. I was so happy to be back in Shawn’s arms and so excited for the rest of the tour. I could tell that we would make many more happy memories!

112 notes · View notes

thisiswhymomworries · 5 years

Text

Week Two

hey it's ya boi back again for a week two transition update! boring info first, then a summary of what's been going on

When: 10/26/19 - 11/1/19 (started T on 10/18/19)

Testosterone: I'm using Androderm, which is a daily patch you stick on exactly like a nicotine patch

Dosage: 2 mg per day, although you can get them in 5 mg per day patches

Changes: Increased hunger (again), new pimples, slightly darker leg hair?, orgasms easier to achieve and feels 20% better

OK so I'm putting the stuff about that last change below the cut lol, along with the bullshit bad side effects from the patches

check out my week one post if you want to know how the increased hunger started off. it's still going though, but it does feel like I'm finally evening out, where I know how hungry I get now and when. for anyone who missed the week one post, the increased hunger means I get hungry a lot sooner than I used to (1-2 hours) and feel it more intensely. this is a difference only eating half to 3/4 of a sandwich, plus some chips, to being able to eat a whole sandwich, 1/4 a bag of chips, and dessert

the redness around my most common breakout areas (as I remember from First Puberty) has developed into one big actual pimple on my chin, and a couple smaller ones around my lip. still some redness on my forehead, but no pimples up there yet. I'm not doing any skincare routine at the moment, but I'm planning on adding a facial wash to my next grocery shopping trip

my leg hair might be slightly darker? idk it's hard to compare bc it's always been so light and fine, I don't have any pictures of it bc I've never been able to SEE it. I never even bothered shaving my thighs when I was femme bc you'd never know without physically touching my leg. the difference now though is that I can see it! so I think it must be a little darker to be actually visible now. no change in how much body hair I have though

tw: this next part does talk about genitals, and I'm using clit / vagina to describe things bc that's what I'm comfortable with. I know that's not the norm for most trans guys though, so skip down to the asterisks in the middle if you need to skip this part

I'm including this bc I couldn't find any good info from an actual trans guy about "downstairs" changes that wasn't actually just porn. scrolling through a thousand trans dick pics on a nsfw reddit sub just to get an idea of what changes to expect was NOT fun

so far, no clit growth as far as I've noticed. I don't have bottom dysphoria, so I'm not especially hoping for it either. I also haven't noticed my libido increasing (getting horny more often), my sexual attraction shifting (yep still ace), becoming wet more often / not getting wet as easily, vaginal tightness / soreness, or any chafing

the only changes have been that I think it's a little easier to make an orgasm happen, regardless of how good the stimulation actually is. I was having a lazy jack off session and hadn't really bothered to get everything wet enough and worked up enough for it to feel as good as it could have, but still had a fucking fantastic orgasm even though the stimulation was just mehh?? so that's weird but cool I guess

the 20% is just a random ass number. I absolutely cannot do math and there's no way to actually measure this. I've just noticed that the handful of orgasms I've had since starting T have been better. not like holy shit a LOT better, but better enough that I sure as hell noticed

for context though, I don't use any sort of penetration and haven't used those types of toys in about two years. haven't had penetrative sex in seven. so if there's any vaginal atrophy, or extra tightness, soreness, etc going on down there, I might not notice as much or as quickly bc I just don't mess with that area

***

OK bullshit skin reaction from the patches. I understand why they get a bad rep because going into week two, I have started getting some pretty nasty reactions, especially since I figured out these are 24 hour patches and started leaving them on that long

the least bad reaction is on my upper arms, which just have very small circles of red skin that coincide exactly with, or are smaller than, the circle of T on the patch that's supposed to seep into your skin

second worst is my stomach, with one side having a slightly bigger red patch similar to the ones on my arms, but the other side that's a little higher up being a much darker red and a bit larger

absolute worst is on my upper thighs. the right thigh has a HUGE swollen red patch, with a big circle in the middle that looks and feels like it got sunburned by a concentrated laser. left side isn't that bad, but it only starts swelling up after you take the patch off, so it could just be taking a bit to get nasty. it's worse than the bad side on my stomach in terms of being even a little bigger than that, but also not as deeply red

this isn't all that bad though bc they don't hurt at all. I'm typing this with my laptop and a laptop table braced on my thighs and stomach right now and absolutely no pain. they don't even hurt to touch, unless I scratch at them

unfortunately, I very much want to scratch at them. so fucking bad. because they ITCH. that's the real concern here. they itch really badly, and it gets way worse when I go outside in the cold and my skin dries out. I've been putting lotion on them a couple of times a day, and that does help. I think part of this reaction is that my skin always gets dry, red, and itchy during the winter, and the patches are 1) making that worse for the area of skin they cover and 2) drying out the skin badly enough that it takes way longer to recover, plus it's always cold right now, so my skin literally can't catch a break

again, I'm not too freaked out by this because it doesn't hurt. if anything hurt, I would be hauling my ass to the doctor because I have a very low pain tolerance! it's just itchy and looks gross. I'm also kind of chill about it because I have an appointment with my endocrinologist in a week anyway, and as long as my skin isn't peeling off or hurting or bleeding, I might as well wait and go in for that appointment instead of dealing with all the hassle, bullshit, and possible extra expensive of trying to arrange something sooner

I've included pictures of the skin reactions, which are kind of gross looking but no worse than a sunburn. underneath the comparison selfies bc I'd rather ppl see me as a human being first and then as a gross dry skin monster lol

(better with or without glasses?)

gross skin reaction pics, didn’t get good ones of my stomach tho, sorry my thighs are so fucking pasty lol

#transgender #trans male #trans #ftm #hrt timeline #my transition

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spooky-skz · 5 years

Text

(4/9) Stray Kids as Apple Employees AU

okay, ik what you’re gonna say.

“wtf mari, why apple employees?”

honestly, i don’t have a good reason.

i literally came out of my shower and was like, “pffft, they’d make funny apple employees,” then this AU was born.

i might continue this, i might not. depends on my itty bitty brain when it comes up with content.

i also sort of wanna do a stray kids as baristas at starbucks but idk

anYWAYS let’s do it.

CHAN!

aaaaah our beloved leader is the technical support advisor who basically helps people with troubleshooting.

he’s the dude you contact when your stupid device isn’t doing what you want it to but you’re….calling from home.

he always has his headset on him. (fyi, it’s a headphone thingy with a mic attached to it.)

Like alWAYS

woojin asked him once why he literally wore it like his life depended on it.

probably because it did

his response was simple, “so i can take calls and help customers while making sure jeongin doesn’t burn the store down at the same time.” （︶︿︶）

woojin didn’t ask any further questions bc he understood all too well. ( ͡° ʖ̯ ͡°)

(don’t worry, i’ll explain later.)

chan was super good at his job lmao.

he effortlessly engaged with people, explaining step by step solutions with patience and had an approach tailored to each individual customer.

papa steve jobs would be v proud indeed

he had difficult responsibilities too bro

imagine getting yelled at for a whole day by people you didn’t even know, because they were angry at a device you didn’t even mAKE-

when they say, ‘patience is a virtue,’ they rlly mean:

pATIENCE

A FUCKIN

VIRTUE

ლ(ಠ益ಠ)ლ bc most people would probably grow annoyed after the other person in the phone line keep shouting & blaming.

but not chan. no. no.

he’d be tolerant with the customer, and continue to provide the best customer service possible. ╮(. ❛ ᴗ ❛.)╭

… i mean… unless the person was getting too aggressive for his liking, then he’d just remove the headpiece, scroll through the company website, and wait till the person has cooled down before proceeding to help them with a positive attitude. (꒪ཀ꒪)

Hyunjin

his job title is literally, ‘Genius,’

i kid you not. i looked this shit up.

jeongin thought it was a legit at first

like they all joined the company at different times but jeongin was the last to hop on the apple train.

hyunjin’s name on the schedule board would be beside the word, ‘genius,’ and for like… two whole months, jeongin thought hyunjin was the mastermind behind the whole apple operation

i cannot tell you how many times hyunjin was approached by jeongin with a problem that he didn’t have the knowledge to help with

luckily, seungmin was feeling nice and explained that, ‘genius,’ was just the name of hyunjin’s job.

why?

seungmin didn’t know either

okay baCK TO HYUNJIN!! his job is to quickly diagnose product issues on the spot, explain what’s wrong with the device to the customer. after determining whether repairs can be done or a replacement is needed, he’d offer solutions to help get users up and running again.

now don’t get me wrong, hyunjin loved his job bc he liked helping people and fixing devices bUT!!!!

after working in the same store for almost a year, these group of girls would literally be there every w e e k e n d to get “help,” from him.

he was flattered and all about the female audience but it was getting stale.

some girls would breAK their devices on purpose just to have an excuse to talk to him.

the convo’s they’d try to initiate wasn’t even about the faulty device anymore.

this rlly bothered him bc it took his time away from helping ACTUAL customers.

eventually, chan banned them from coming in to disrupt the peace of the store and to protect hyunjin from their beady eyes and weirdness.

jeongin mostly came to hyunjin for help with something (bc he knew the older dude wouldn’t tell chan)

& these two doods would try to fix the problem together!! hopefully before chan finds out about the problem bc

oof

then mr. advisor would be streSSED AF and

they’d get a scolding from mother!woojin

Jeongin

our bby boy is the technical specialist who helps people get started with using their devices.

gets excited with you when you get your new phone or computer.

knows all the tips and tricks on getting the most out of your device

is especially patient with the elderly and first-time users.

he knows!! that technology is difficult to understand and work around when you’re barely starting out so he’ll take as long as necessary to help someone understand how the phone or laptop works.

but...

y’all…

don’t let this boi anywhere a fire hazard area

i mean, he doesn’t mean to start fires

they just...happen???

like, they have this small employee mini kitchen in the upstairs breakroom (literally the whole 2nd floor could be a one bedroom apartment)

and of course when there’s a kitchen, there has to be SNACKS!!!

and jeongin was hungry during his shift.

so he goes up during the non-busy hours of the day to get himself some fud

(✿◠‿◠) a growing boi needs his nutrients!!

chan had left briefly for a coffee run, woojin was downstairs trying to fix a malfunctioning monitor. the other boys were either sick, out for lunch, or hadn’t clocked in yet.

jeongin put in a bag of popcorn in the microwave, and checked the box for instructions

it said, “for 5,000 watt microwave = 2 min. for 500 watt microwave = 4 min.”

he checked the microwave and it was 1,000 watt :-)

uhhh he didn’t really know at what time to put it in as so…

he typed in 3 min.

he didn’t mind having some burnt popcorn bc hey!! he just wanted to eat something.

he took a seat in front of felix’s computers and started scrolling through the security tapes in hopes of finding one funny footage of a customer.

:-) it started smelling like smoke for some odd reason.

mmm yep that was the smell of smoke for sure.

wonder where that’s coming from?

he thought.

he turned around to look for the source, and

HOLY SHIT THE MICROWAVE WAS ON FIRE

the panic in his body went from 0% to 100% real quick.

jeongin couldn’t just turn off the damned heating machine bc it was in flames, but he just couldn’t let it continue to get bigger and bigger.

he grabbed the pitcher of lemonade at the table and yEET that juice all over the microwave.

it did like minimal help.

he could hear chan entering the store, calling for woojin to help him bring the cups upstairs to the break room

oh no

he was in the break room.

he grabbed a wash cloth from the sink and began smACKIN at the flames

cue the parents walking in.

chan: (.•̵̑⌓•̵̑)

woojin: ༼ ༎ຶ ෴ ༎ຶ༽

without wasting another second, woojin yanked jeongin away from the fire bc it was starting to get really big and he could have gotten hurt ( ˘︹˘)

while chan got the fire extinguisher from beside the fridge

was that always there? jeongin asked himself

and chan used it to stop the fire.

poor bby jeongin got a massive scolding from both parents and told him to be more cautious next time.

then they all cleaned up the mess before the rush of people came in the shop!!

the next day, the other boys walked in to woojin spraying the SHIT outta this air freshener all over the break room bc it reaked of burnt popcorn & metal.

windows were all open to the smell out and the beloved microwave was nowhere to be seen.

chan was sipping on his morning cup of coffee when minho asked what happened.

“jeongin nearly burned the store down so there’s no more microwave.”

“oh. okay.”

Felix

ahhh okay so his job isn’t anything tech related really, except for when he watches people through his cams

he was the security guard of the store uwu

he has so far prevented 7 fights from happening and 6 of those 7 were between minho and seungmin lmao.

he was the perfect man for this job bc on the outside, his face is like: (づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ

but when he’s upset or angry, mr. security guard mode is activated (ง’̀-‘́)ง so he has to remove people from the premises.

he uses his SCARY voice when dealing with overly aggressive people and it usually does the trick when he asks them to leave

but when lil kids are just so excited and curious about the devices, he uses his soft uwu voice to converse with them about their day or what they’re doing in school

overall the cutest & dependable guard ever!!! 11/10

once changbin kept trying to fiddle with felix’s computer and he was like, “bro.. you’ve been trying to guess my password for like 2 hours. it’s not yngbok01.”

and changbin was soooo frustrated with this and he looked at felix like (ﾉಥ益ಥ）ﾉ ┻━┻ “PLS JUST SIGN IN!!”

a smirk was on the guard’s face as he asked why he should.

changbin looked defeated and finally said, “i was locking up the store last thursday and was doing my own version of karaoke and i… tripped on the cords, and my jeans ripped open as i fell. If that blackmailer minho gets his hands on that footage, i’m dONE FOR—”

felix nearly toppled over from laughing so much as he watched the clip of what happened while changbin was visibly on edge, looking for any sign that minho was in the room

he still deleted the clip tho bc he’s a good friend

( 。・_・。)人(。・_・。 )

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takeabitetoremember · 6 years

Text

Stay With Me (Part 16)

Once Michael was sure he had Mallory in a deep sleep, he slipped out of bed and dressed, looking down at her sleeping so peacefully. The last thing he wanted to do was wake her. In the back of his mind, there was still a fear of her losing the baby, and whatever he could do to care for her, and keep her healthy, he was going to do it. He knew he didn’t deserve her, that wasn’t even a question up for debate. He’d lost her once, and he’d be damned if he’d ever lose her again. Slipping out of their room quietly, he began reflecting; her powers were coming back much quicker than he’d hoped and it was starting to become a problem. As he approached the grand staircase, Mrs. Mead was ascending.

“Mr. Langdon”, nodding.

“Ah, Mrs. Mead. Just the person I was looking for. I’d like to request a conference with you. Are you available?” standing atop the staircase, looking down at the older woman with his hands clasped behind his back.

“Yes Mr. Langdon. Are you requesting one now?”, stopping at the top of the staircase, looking up at the tall man with a firm inquisitive look.

“Yes, Mrs. Mead. Right now. I realize it’s late, but we have”, pausing, taking a deep breath, cocking his head to the right, looking up, then back at her, “a bit of a situation, we need to discuss. I think some things need to be taken care of sooner than later.”

Nodding in understanding, smiling. “I understand, Mr. Langdon, say no more. Let’s go”, taking the arm he offers her, walking to his office.

As the door shuts, he turns to her, taking a deep breath, letting it out, “First thing in the morning, send Timothy and Emily to the Sanctuary. There will be a carriage outside waiting for them.”

“Michael, what is going on? We had a plan. I tho-“

Absolutely enraged that his mother dare cut him off or question his plans, looking up, glaring at her, “I said they are going to the Sanctuary first thing in the morning, you are to make sure they are ready. There will be a carriage outside waiting for them. Next, make SURE you and Venable have the apples ready for the Halloween Masquerade tomorrow night. We’ll leave immediately following. Just the three of us: You, Mallory, and me.”

Nodding in understanding, “The Masquerade is all set, Venable and I took care of the apples tonight, so you have no problem, there. She’s dying for Mallory to eat one. Do you want me to swap out one of the poisoned apples for a non-poisoned one for Venable?” a dark grin crossing her face.

Leaning back against his desk, crossing his arms, thinking of all the ways he could kill Venable, the ways it would hurt most, being as painful and tortuous as possible, and then oh yes THEN then hell she’ll be condemned to. The hell that Venable will spend eternity in, that’s the most delightful part of all to him. A slight smile crosses his face, looking over to the older woman, “Perhaps, but I want to see it.”

“Duly noted, is there anything else?” hands clasped in front her making sure she has the plans in order, knowing the coming day has much to be done.

“As always, keep Mallory away from it all. She knows too much already. Her powers are coming back, and too fast, and too strong. She woke up screaming, she’d seen the Halloween Masquerade in her dreams. She’d seen everyone dead and was sobbing. That’s not what I’m as concerned about. She saw those fucking cunts that took her away from me. I fear that they lived somehow. I don’t how it could be possible, but for Mallory to have seen this, it concerns me. If they lived, I want to confront the and destroy them alone. I don’t want her seeing or knowing. I have to get her out of here as soon as possible. I’d send her first thing in the morning with Emily and Timothy if I thought she’d go, but I know she won’t leave without me.”

“Oh Michael. Time is of the essence. Are you going to try to do the wedding ritual with her?” walking over, taking his hand, patting it lovingly, knowing how much that meant to her that he always honored his father.

Turning his head, hating disappointing her, more than anyone. Shaking his head, patting her hand, knowing this is going to be yet another disappointment. He knows he’s already been a disappointment to his father in so many ways, now, he’s disappointing his mother, yet again. “There’s not enough time. At least not here. Perhaps we can at the Sanctuary”, trying to give her some hope, smiling.

“She won’t have her beautiful dress, but what matters is that the two of you are bound together.”

Thinking her heard her stirring in the bedroom, putting his finger up to his mouth to shshh Mrs. Mead, shaking his head.

Whispering, “I think she’s getting up to go to the bathroom. Morning sickness hits her in the middle of the night. I’ve got to get back to bed. Remember what I said, and make sure it all happens.”

Nodding, smiling at Michael as she turns, walking quietly out of his office.

Sitting down at his desk, opening up his laptop sending out an email-

To: Cooperative

From: Langdon, Michael

Subject: Send Carriage Outpost 3 for Morning Pickup to Sanctuary (and Evening Pick Up For Langdon)

Priority: HIGH

Body:

In the morning Mrs. Mead will have two subjects: Timothy and Emily ready for transport to the Sanctuary. They are genetically compatible for reproduction and should be treated as a level 4. As of tomorrow evening it is pertinent that you send ANOTHER carriage for ME. I will be returning tomorrow night to the Sanctuary. I wish for my carriage to arrive at Outpost 3 NO later than dusk. There will be three individuals on this transport: Mrs. Mead, my wife (Mallory), and me.

Langdon

Dawn has not even begun to break, and Emily hears a loud voice she’s come to hate over the past 18, 19 how long has been? She’s lost count at this point.

“Emily, Emily. Get up. It’s eviction day for you.”

Sitting up in her bed, wide-eyed, thinking Venable and Mrs. Mead decided to kill her, turning to look at the older woman, clutching her blanket, trembling.

“Wha- what?” her voice shaking.

Rolling her eyes, sighing. “Langdon promised you and Timothy a spot in the Sanctuary, todays the day kid. Get up. There will be a carriage here at dawn. I know it takes longer for you to get your dress on so you were woken up first. Get dressed and come downstairs quietly. Tell no one, speak to no one.”

Looking at the older woman in shock, knowing that Langdon *did* promise them spots in the Sanctuary but they only half believed it. To be honest, they were terrified of the man, and didn’t know if anything he said was real or not, but they knew they’d never betray anything he asked. Her heart was beating a mile a minute as she got out of the bed, wondering if they had to wear all of the corsets and nonsense at the Sanctuary, or if they got to wear normal clothes as she pulled her corset, tying it up, pulling on her big purple evening gown zipping it up. Picking up her shoes so they won’t make any noise as she peeks out the door.

Just down the hall, Mrs Mead walks into Timothy’s room, “Time to wake up sleepy head, it’s eviction day for you boy!”

Just like Emily, sitting straight up, eyes opening wide, looking around the room, locking on Mrs. Mead, “What, what’s going on?”

“You and that girlfriend of yours”, shaking her head. “I’ll make it short and sweet. You both know you’re going to the Sanctuary. Today’s the day. Get up, get your clothes on. You’re leaving at dawn. Say nothing to no one. Meet me at the bottom of the stairs.”

Swallowing hard, running his fingers through his hair, unable to believe that they’re really going. REALLY. REALLY. GOING. He didn’t even know if they Sanctuary was real, and now he and Emily were getting ready to go. It was all unreal. He was praying it was real. He knew with Langdon, though, until he actually *saw* the Sanctuary, he wasn’t what he considered safe. He’d just seen too much.

Descending the grand staircase, seeing Mrs. Mead and Langdon at the bottom, putting on her shoes once she reaches the bottom, feeling nervous, unsure if she’s getting ready to walk to her death, or an actual real carriage taking her to the Sanctuary. She can’t remember the last time she was this nervous.

Looking to her, tilting his head feeling the absolute fear coming from the young woman, getting ready to speak, as Timothy appears at the top of the staircase, beginning to ascend.

Turning, Emily takes a deep breath, smiling, taking his hand, leaning into him much the same way Mallory leans into Michael.

Taking note, Michael says nothing. Although he is unable to feel empathy, he recognizes this as familiar, perhaps what the two of them would’ve been had they not been separated. Maybe, deep down inside, that’s why he’d spared their lives. With his arms behind his back, watching the loving display for a moment, then clearing his throat.

“The two of you will be travelling to the Sanctuary this morning. You’ll be taken through and suited up in suit to protect you against the radiation. We were not all able to travel together at once, so Mrs. Mead, Mallory, and I will be travelling this evening after I tie up some loose ends here and make sure everything is running smoothly. I have left instructions that you are to be treated VERY well until I arrive. If anyone does not treat you well, take names, and let me know.”

Walking them towards the decontamination unit, watching as they’re suited up. Michael standing there with his hands behind his back as the young people are hurriedly shoved into the big yellow suits, eyes wide, trembling, unsure of what their future holds, as the door to the outside opens for the first time in almost two years. They don’t know what to do when they’re hurriedly escorted from the Outpost into the carriage, there’s barely time to look at the scorched earth, not that they could see much at dusk, everything is pretty much gray, and gray upon gray is well gray.

Hands clasped behind his back, boots clicking as he walks down the hall. “One thing down”, thinking to himself. “Now, to wipe out these dolts, and I can move forward with what I was born to do with whom I was born to do it with.” A broad smile crossing his face, thinking this time things would work out. It would be different this time. The would be no LeVay walking through his front door taking him away from her. There would be NO ONE taking him away from her. There would be no one taking their baby. This time, they would have a family. Maybe he didn’t deserve it, but she did. Climbing the staircase, leaning over the railing, reflecting at his time as a student at Hawthorne. It cut deeply that the one place he thought he belonged for so long, he’d been betrayed, yet again. Where hadn’t he been betrayed? They knew the entire time that Mallory was at Miss Robichaux's all along, that’s why they were so hesitant about confronting the witches. Feeling the anger boiling up inside of him again, the anger they’d taught him to control, as he began to think of Cordelia and Myrtle. Looking down, the only regret he had was that amongst the bodies that would strewn out in the grand hall that their bodies wouldn’t be among them. For now, Venable’s body would simply have to do, she’d angered him plenty over his time at the Outpost.

There was so much to do, and despite being the Prince of Chaos himself, he didn’t like things being unpredictable unless he was the cause. Something just didn’t feel right, he couldn’t put his finger on it which made him even more uneasy. Going over every detail, ever plan in his head over and over. He and Mrs. Mead had been so careful, they’d planned everything meticulously so that they only thing left after this horrid soiree would be getting Mallory out into the carriage without seeing the bodies. If need be, he’d put her to sleep, just temporarily, to do so. The Cooperative had gotten his message, clearly. They’d shown up just before dawn as instructed to take Timothy and Emily to the Sanctuary, and he knew there was no question they would be there just before dusk for them. Standing straight, smoothing his jacket, looking around observantly, knowing it won’t be long before the Gray’s will start making their rounds for linens. There is no longer any breakfast, not for most, although many still rise early due to Venable and her Nazi Germany like schedule. Michael had found her and strict adherence quite amusing. Despite his beloved Mallory, she was given the Outpost with almost the most absolute worthless hopes for building his new world, yet, she was the one to keep them all alive. The irony was just too delicious for even him.

With his hands clasped behind his back, his sinister laugh could be heard echoing through the halls along with the click of his heels and his made his way down the long corridor to his office. Cringing as he enters, hearing Mallory in the next room, she hasn’t eaten this morning, and is already sick. He can hear her tears as lays on the bathroom floor, her head on the toilet, thinking no one can hear her.

Tired and weak, having spent the greater part of three hours running back and forth, finally resigning herself to the floor, unsure if she even has the strength to get up at this point, she can’t remember the morning sickness being this bad. Maybe it was, maybe it’s because Michael was there by her side all the time. He wasn’t busy with whatever it is he does now. The hormones raging in her body are doing her no justice as she begins to think, making the tears pour like rain. Sobbing as she grips the toilet, sniffling, getting herself so upset she begins to dry heave again. Breathing hard, trying so hard not to dry heave any more, trying to stop crying, pulling a towel down from the bronze towel rack mounted to the wall, laying wiping her face, laying over onto the cool floor.

“I’m so tired. I’m just so tired. Michael, I want to go home. I just want us to back home. Why did you ever leave, Michael? Oh, why?” whispering to herself, clutching the soft towel her eyes closed, picturing their old bathroom just the way it was after a bath, thinking if she just wills herself hard enough, they’ll be there when she opens her eyes.

“Michael, I want to go home. I just want us to go back home. Why did you ever leave, Michael? Oh, why?” Mallory’s voice was so soft, and faint, but it was pounding in Michael’s head over and over. Those words were like a knife into his heart. Looking at her, laying there on that bathroom floor, she looked so small and helpless. Her body looked frail, head laying on a towel against the cold floor, porcelain cheeks tear stained. She was his Mallory, the same woman he’s loved since he was a young man, the only woman he’s ever loved. He didn’t even know he was capable of loving anyone until he met her. He still hates himself for what he did to her, to Harper, and knows he can never make it up. Maybe, that’s why he’s feeling uneasy. Looking down at her, despite everything the Sanctuary has, he doesn’t know if it’s enough. Will it make Mallory happy? What do I do? I thought if I gave her another baby that would make her happy. We could begin our lives again, just like where we left off. Looking down at her frail body, he realized for the first time, despite having control over the entire world, destroying it, and creating a new one, he didn’t have control over the one thing he desired the most; His Mallory. This terrified him.

Slowly walking into the bathroom, Mallory could hear the heels of his boots clicking. She stopped sniffling and began to smile, immediately feeling comforted, she stopped shaking, opening her eyes, “Michael”, whispering softly.

“How long have you been in here, Mallory?” sitting her up, wiping her eyes, feeling guilty, reaching for a washcloth to rinse the tears from her beautiful face.

Shaking her head weakly, laying it against his chest, desperate to be close to him, “I don’t know. A couple of hours, maybe? I lost count”, just clinging to him holding her there in the floor, closing her eyes as she hears his heart beating, smiling, fighting back a few sniffles. “Michael, I don’t remember it being this bad the last time. You know, when I was pregnant. Maybe it’s because I was younger? I remember Moira brining me 7-up and crackers, and you’d always make sure she brought me a cup of ice. I miss that”, looking up into his eyes, “I miss our home, and you.”

Kissing her forehead, closing his eyes, not knowing how to reply. He hated that home for so many years. He wasn’t wanted there. His birth mother refused to see him, or speak to him, his grandmother committed suicide to get away from him. If it weren’t for Mallory, he would have no good memories there. The ONLY good memories he really has there are with her when he thinks about it. The memories with his grandmother were of him desperately trying to get her love, and her constant disapproval. With Mallory, her love for him was unconditional. They fought on occasion, but always made up. This was on his mind as he picked her up, holding her close to his body, placing her in their bed, caressing her face looking down at her.

“I’m sorry, Mallory”, holding her petite hand, “I know how much you miss our home. At times, I miss it too. I’m sorry about Harper, that-“ turning his head, stopping, as if he’s almost at a loss for words.

Placing her small hand atop his, looking up at him empathetically, smiling gently, patting his hand, “It’s ok, Michael. We were both so young. We didn’t know. We couldn’t know. There are days it eats me up inside, but I remember this.”

“That we were, Mallory. That’s why I’m determined this time things would be different. I’m able to care for you, now. I won’t be leaving you, and we will have a home of our own, forever. I promise you, my angel. We’ll be leaving this evening, so I want you to get some rest. Try to sleep as much as you can today. We’ll be leaving at dusk”, leaning over, running his fingers through her hair, giving her a gentle kiss.

“I love you, Michael.”

“I love you, Mallory”, looking back at her one final time, realizing she’s the entire reason he’s doing all he’s doing today. He’s clearing the way for the three of them to go to the Sanctuary. He’s ready for the new start, and certain that Mrs. Mead will eventually warm up to Mallory. She knew about her years ago, even if she didn’t know back then she was a witch. His father isn’t thrilled about it either, but once again, he doesn’t care, either. It isn’t Burger King, he can’t have it his way. Some sacrifices had to be made, and well, Michael ended the world, so he got one thing he wanted- and that was HIS wife. There’s too much to that has to go right today, and he can’t afford for any of it to go wrong. As his heels begin to click down the dark halls, the first of the day’s sinister plans are set into motion.

Taglist:

@langdonicotine

@Kilcort

@nely-collins

@neonlacrima

@waiting-to-be-lost-at-sea

@perfect-ginger-maniac

@bi-tiger

@amanda-d0000

@memepetrafied

@zonietta

@nellychick

@lxngdonscoven

#millory #mallory #michael langdon #american horror story apocalypse #ahs apocalypse #stay with me #ahs apocalypse fan fiction

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calyssmarviss · 6 years

Text

Supernatural 14x02 - Gods and Monsters

(You mean like that Lana del Rey song that I put on my destiel playlist after watching the Purgatory Arc?)

"In the land of gods and monsters, I was an angel. Living in the garden of evil, Screwed up, scared, doing anything that I needed. Shining like a fiery beacon..."

THEN:

I struggled for hours to fall asleep now I can’t get out of bed… Wait isn’t there a Supernatural episode to watch????????????? We Friday, right? Urgh that show really gonna make me go downstairs to make coffee and come back upstairs and power up my laptop and download the episode and sit at my desk and actually focus isn’t it? I hate Supernatural. *a full minute of contemplating death by giving up later* Ok man let’s do this. *gets up and puts on plaid shirt over my otherwise scantily clad figure* (sorry i just love the words "scantily" and "clad" and i only ever get to use them together) COOOOFFEEEEEEE

NOW:

OH IS THIS GONNA BE A DEAN POV THING???? BECAUSE THOSE LOOK LIKE THE LAST THING HE SAW AND DID BEFORE MICHAEL TOOK OVER (i mean in the recap)

Children, I think it's torture time. Lol he put down the cap. Don't wanna stain it, right? Well I for one am delighted by this decision. You're doing good so far today Dinkle. Oh yeah it's definitively torture time. Look at those poor chained saps.

Uhm, yes.

Ahah I thought for a wild sec that he was going to spit in that blood, I don't know why.

What kind of soup are you making Dinkle?

DUDE ARE YOU TRYIN TO MAKE ANGELS

TITLE CARD

Mhm. Lil’ wings.

Bobby: "Who goes to Duluth in October?"

Me, who has watched Fargo and hence looked up the towns in the area: "Oh, nice continuity! Remember how he said that he wouldn't live as far north as Sioux Fall?????"

D'you think Cas is agreeing like "yeah you're right my bros and sis are fucking liars" or more like "yeah beware me I'll lie to you so I can go on solo suicide missions in order to prove my worth to Humanity".

Somehow I paused at the perfect moment where you can see that Cas thinks it's total bullshit and will come anyway because that's his husband we're talking about he ain't just gonna stay there Sam.

Framing.

*snickers at the pistol cocks caption* I should stop hanging with barely-out-of-their-teenage-years boys.

Anyway who wrote this episode I should check it out. Man there are a lot of producers and co-producers on this... And i managed to miss the writer's name 2 times in a row. Let's go ask the wikia. Ew, gross. A Bucklemming. Eh at least RSJr directed it. OH WAIT A SEC BUCKLEMMING WROTE HELL'S ANGEL! I'll will forgive (almost) everything if they do us a reverse.

Blah blah blah Nick Drama.

No, he can't look at you because, having this dickface? It's on you bud. I mean Cas can look at Sam alright, and I'm pretty sure he didn't mind looking at himself in the mirror more than he did before getting his ass possessed by Lucifer. Nah, Nick, it's just you and your Mark Pellegrino face.

Oh, okay, the writer and director's name are just arriving now.

NO THAT'S WHAT HE TELLS HIMSELF SO HE CAN LIVE WITH SAYING YES AND LET LUCIFER OUT OF THE CAGE OH MY GOD WHY ARE YOU BEING SO MEAN TO CAS RN

Seriously what's the fucking point of the Nick Drama? Because I know Bucklemming they're not doing this for Cas. They're maybe doing it a little bit for Dean (who is the one being possessed by an archangel rn)... But they’re probably mainly doing it for Nick himself and: WHO CARES.

Wait what? He doesn't remember what happened to his family? Does he think that Lucifer killed them?

God this is pissing me off.

Mortician: "We don't usually see this kind of action in Duluth."

YOU LIAR I'VE SEEN FARGO I KNOW ALL ABOUT THE CORPSES THAt LittEr thiS AREA

"Five star smitting."

*cries over the stars Cas lost* he’s, like, a two stars right now *sobs*

Jack: "I'm researching how long it takes archangel grace to replenish."

Oh you sweet summer child. You ain't gonna find anything about that in *books*.

Jack: "The books say it can take from a month to..." Cas: "A century."

THIS IS BULLSHIT. THERE'S NO WAY HE FOUND THAT INFO AND THAT IT'S CORRECT. I mean first who the fuck met an archangel with low grace levels before the Winchesters? NO ONE THAT'S WHO BECAUSE THOSE GUYS WEREN'T BUDDIES WITH HUMANS BEFORE THE APOCALYPSE OMG I HATE ALL OF THIS.

Except Cas and Jack. They're good boys. Not their fault their dialogue is shit.

Jack: "You don't understand what I'm going through."

Well that's fucking rude buddy. You at least have a home while you're going through it.

Jack: "What did you have left?"

"That one time Dean came to see me and we spent the night together and Jack, there was only one bed..."

Cas: "I had Sam and Dean."

BULLSHIT Sam was Gadreel half of the time and Dean was like "fuck off" and "fuck me" all at the same time .

Cas: "As Dean would say..."

Kill me now.

I hate how I knew it was Jensen just by seeing his hands.

I also really resent his hotness right now. It feels like, you know, a weapon in the wrong hands? When he's playing Dean, I know he won't harm me (through the screen lol), but this asshole? I wanna stay away.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

This is like, next level meta here. I'M FEELING ATTACKED.

URGH CAN WE DROP NICK ALREADY.

DON'T.

CARE.

Oh great now Cas is touching his shoulder.

Wait I know the actress that plays Lydia... OH. YES. It's Abigail Ashe from Black Sails!

Ooooh girl, those are some really ugly teeth.

You're right Nick, nobody cares.

People @ Cas: "You don't understand."

Bitch he probably does better than you.

Nick: "You're just a stone cold body snatcher."

I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS.

Nick: "You're no different than Lucifer."

I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS.

Because, yeah, it's a bit true but: 1) Cas actually regrets it 2) YOU HAVE NO FUCKING RIGHT TO HAVE MARK PELLEGRINO SAY THOSE LINES TO HIS FACE

Michael, channeling the Dean: "There's a purity in that."

MAN, LANA DEL REY

OH NO NOUGAT WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU CAN'T DO THAT. YOU CAN'T EVEN TELL THE TRUTH. SEE IT'S SAD AND TERRIBLE THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW SHE'S DEAD.

Hey... do they think their daughter is working for Trump now? Wait more important: did Jack learned to drive? Where are the Klines living? Didn't Cas notice he was gone? Did Nick talked to him all day about his Nick Drama so that Cas didn't even notice his son was gone for hours???

WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN TO CAS TODAY JACK. YOU CAN'T JUST GO AHEAD AND TELL HIM YOU WANNA KILL HIS HUSBAND (tho I guess that now that Nick is a thing *eyeroll* they'll end up killing Michael without killing Dean but somehow i doubt that it's what Jack is suggesting).

Jack: "Dean doesn't matter."

WELL FUCK YOU VERY MUCH JACK WINCHESTER-KLINE AS OF RIGHT NOW YOU'RE ON MY SHIT LIST YOU BETTER MAKe IT UP TO ME, CAS AND DEAN ASAP OR ELSE

HOW DID NICK WENT FROM KANSAS TO DELAWARE SO QUICKLY??? It's half the states' width! (I mean, assuming this guy lives in the same area Nick is from and this is the evening of the day all the Nick Drama happened - and we have no reason to think it isn't)

Oh yeah they're in Delaware.

I didn't really payed attention to the fight sequence because I was painting my nails purple (to go with the plaid shirt) but MAN GIVIN WEREWOLVES SILVER IMMUNITY IS CHEATING.

Is it me or Sam was pretty silent this whole episode? Bucklemming gave all his lines to Nick.

Uh, what.

What are you playing at Dinkle.

HOLY OIL RING HIM!!!

Oh, look at that, Nick killed Arty. What a surprise.

Aaaand, it's over. I'm disappointed. Cas didn't go after Dinkle :( YOU HAD ONE JOB BUCKLEMMING

#gods and monsters #spn season 14 #supernatural #spn reaction #spn spoilers #calyss watches spn #bucklemming #long post

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kataissues-blog · 4 years

Text

Barkada

Ever since highschool, i am close with my barkada, i have a lot of guy friends actually. I see them as my bro’s, like literally like a brother. They are always there for me when i need someone. We drink, smoke and do all of that stupid stuff every group of friends do. But, seriously, nothing sexual involved. It’s just pure friendship.

I never would have thought that one of them have secret sexual desires about me, or basically wanted to fuck me. pinakaganda ko lang slight.

I am blinded by everything, I just really see them as my brother. It never crossed my mind onto doing naughty stuff with them or something. They always sleep in my room, even tho i’m the only woman in the room. I just didnt care, and they didn’t too.

On a tuesday afternoon, my friends and I somewhat went to a roadtrip, we went to a place where there’s full of coconut trees and banana trees. We went there to just eat and chill. We talked about life, and all the problems involved in life. hahahha. But yeah that was basically it.

Ever felt that feeling, like when you’re in a room. Someone’s staring at you or like the energy of someone that wants to have a taste of you? or smthng like that.

We went back to my place, it was actually a really long drive. We got caught by the rain too. I was in the front seat and so was this friend of mine.

4 of us was in our house. We were in my room just chilling, and they got hungry. They wanted to buy food. I was willing to go with them, but instead this friend of mine wanted the two other friends to take his motorcycle and buy the food. and yeah we were actually smoking in my room too. So everyone’s a bit high, except for that one friend.

We went downstairs bc that friend showed them how to drive his motorcycle. He went back up stairs, to my room. I waited a minute or so downstairs because there was this kid that was crying, I wanted to calm her down. But i just gave her a lil space. So yeah I went back to my room.

When I go in, he kept on saying that he was fucking high, like he just told us earlier too that he won’t smoke cuz he wanted to focus on his school and stuff like that. It was a bit sketchy, he told me he was high. He turned off the lights and he was just in my bed.

I literally sat on my dressing table, i was just there, on my laptop minding my goddamn business. But something was off- i wondered why he turned off the lights. I asked him “does turning off the lights help you not get high” and yes i literally said that bc idk how to fuckin talk anymore.

He chatted me, he literally said “lezgo” and he’s just literally behind me. And I asked him

“Where are we goin?”

“What? no, can you come near me for a sec”

“Why tho?” confused and idk wt to do

“Just come,”

I said alright and went near him, chillin, he told me to sit on his lap. So i did, he asked me if I was high. I said “a lil bit yeah” and he told me he was super high, and told him oh alright. he asked “can we have 1 round”, i’m like “1 round smoking shesh shit again?” and he said no and he asked if we can have a quickie, i was fucking shocked dude. Like you’re my friend, we’re fucking bros what the fuck is happening. Hahahahha i was making jokes and asked him million of questions, but he just told me he was serious. If I declined, it was going to be fuckin awkward. So yeah, i agreed, he took off my shorts, he took off his clothes. And fuck, we FUCKED, i didnt even kiss him, or neither did he try. But we just fucked right away, sucked him a lil bit but my mouth was fucking dry. But yeah that happened. He cummed so quick, like 2 mins or so, he cummed in me, a lil bit in me. I went to the bathroom asap, and peed and cleaned myself. Went back to the room like nothing happened at all. I was on my laptop back again. And that’s it. boring story but it seriously was weird for me. idk wt to think it’s fuckin awkward my dudes.

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princessdevy03 · 7 years

Text

Tumblr Exclusive!!!!

Author’s Note: Life does indeed have many open doors, but you should always be polite like Opportunity and knock on them first.

For @anybodihearme….

Get a damn lock, girl!

KnockEdd

“Hey.”

Edd turned away from the sink towards the voice that called out to him but kept stirring the KoolAid he was making.

“Hey, yourself. How’d it go?” He asked as he turned back around to tap the wooden spoon on the edge of the container and grab the lid.

“Ugh,” Kevin groaned as he came into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around him. “I hate statistics.”

Edd gently patted his hand in empathy and to get Kevin to move so he could put the pitcher of the sweet drink in the fridge to chill before dinner.

“I’m making tacos,” he said as he started to pull the ingredients out he’d need for their Mexican spread.

“Awesome,” Kevin groaned before pushing himself off the kitchen table and going upstairs to his room.

One by one, their roommates started to trickle into the house about thirty minutes after Edd started dinner; first, Ed and then Nazz, who actually helped him, followed by Sarah and Eddy, who both stayed out of the way, but still contributed to the conversation.

When Kevin came back downstairs just as Ed was lining up Nazz’s expertly chopped veggies, it was almost as if the air was sucked out of the room, but the redhead was too tired to care and the ravenette was too busy to notice.

All Ed knew was that Edd was tense and Kevin was tired. He was sure he was going to get an earful from his best friend soon, but all he really wanted was to get through dinner first.

Dinner went normally, the clean up was quick with Kevin shooing everyone but Ed out of the kitchen.

“You get the notes for Campbell's class?” Kevin asked Ed as he wiped down the table.

“Yeah, and I got you the attendance code for the day. Where were you man?” Ed asked as he pulled out his phone to jot down the code Kevin would need to sign in for their 9AM class that morning and be counted as present on Post It note Edd had pulled out of his back pocket.

“Sleep,” Edd snorted and Kevin rolled his eyes as Ed shook his head.

“I did all my shit on Google today so I’ll just email it to you,” Ed said before skipping to the freezer for a pint of his favorite ice cream, doing his own happy dance to the silverware drawer for a spoon, then continuing to dance right out of the kitchen.

Kevin and Edd shared a chuckle as they watched him carry on, but then a serious look crossed Kevin’s face and Edd groaned.

“Let’s go,” Kevin sighed as he pushed him up the stairs and to the growing pile of homework that was getting too hard to ignore.

An hour later, as they sat on Edd’s bed and he was looking over Kevin’s Algebra 300 homework for errors while Kevin read over his speech notes for his public speaking class to make sure all his points were clear and concise, Eddy nearly ripped the door off the hinges as he burst through, waving a presentation folder in his hand.

“EDDY!” Edd screamed. “KNOCK!”

“Whatever, Sockhead,” he groaned as he shoved the presentation into Edd’s lap that was full of his laptop, two notebooks, and Kevin’s Algebra textbook.

Kevin pulled away a bit as he knew that his place in their long friendship was always shaky from Eddy’s point of view, but Edd’s hand on his knee gave them both pause.

“Eddy, it’s real fucking rude to burst into closed off rooms and I’m not helping you-”

“You’re helping him!” Eddy protested, ticked that Kevin was once again taking precedence over him and his access to Edd’s bright mind because he was sitting on Edd’s bed and not his own.

“Reviewing a few math problems is NOT the same as trying to decipher your econ presentation. If you had come to me when I told you I was free to help you, I’d gladly done so, but I cannot and I won’t,” he stated coldly as he shoved the folder back into Eddy’s hand and turned his attention back to yet another work email, a rush of anxiety coursing through him as he got a new email alert from a former lover who was now his new research director.

Seeing the stressed out look on his face made Eddy and Kevin a bit concerned, so Eddy took his folder and trudged out of the room closing the door behind him as Kevin pulled his textbook and notebook out of Edd’s lap.

“You ok, Eddward?”

“I’m fine,” Edd sighed a small smile crossing his face as Kevin was the only person in the house to call him by his given name. “Just Johnny tripping about making sure the interns get their lab reports turned in on time.”

Kevin patted his thigh before trying to turn his wrong answers into the correct ones and the house grew a bit more quiet as everyone did their best to make this journey across the state worth the expense and their parents proud.

Two hours later, Ed knocked on the door and Edd invited him in without looking up from the screen he was reading as he scribbled a few notes in his notebook.

“We’re heading out to see It, you in?”

“No,” Edd groaned as he finally looked up at his friend. “I’ve got too much to do.”

A disappointed look crossed Ed’s face before he cocked his brow at Kevin who shook his head.

“I’m backed up on readings because of work, man, so I gotta pass. Y’all have fun, though.”

A silly grin crossed the horror lover’s face as he turned to leave the room, and as he slowly and dramatically closed the door, Edd called out, “You better not go see American Satan without me!”

“You’re only going because you think Andy Black is hot,” Kevin damn near sneered at him and Edd tossed his head back on a dramatic groan before emailing the interns to get their lab reports into his mailbox at the lab as soon as possible.

An hour later, Kevin sat up to put his chin on his shoulder and looked at the screen in front of him.

There were six tabs open, one to Tumblr where he was currently messaging his former swim team teammate, Justin, about some guy named Max, who was doing the absolute most in trying to get his attention.

DoubleDee42: Well with a name like THAT

CaptChocoDrop: shut up dee

DoubleDee42: IJS THO!

Then he clicked on the tab that was a Google Doc where it looked to be something like six different people editing the same section of a lab report at once.

Edd stared at the screen for a solid minute, a thoughtful look on his face before he made a comment in the margin that while Lee had the right idea, it would be better executed Marie’s way, and he wanted May to correlate the results before their meeting Thursday.

The girls sent messages in the affirmative with Marie talking shit about how she got her way as he closed out the tab before the next tab opened to an Amazon page where a smartphone controlled drone stared back at them.

He sighed wistfully before adding it to his wishlist and rolled his neck.

“What do you want, Kevin?”

The redhead chuckled before he stretched and said, “Just seeing what you were up to. I got my shit done, what about you?”

“How’d my speech look?” He asked, the lack of confidence in his tone about being able to deliver a speech about how his mother’s research on the migration habits of hummingbirds being the biggest influence in his choice to go into botany science when he got to college.

“You’ll be fine,” Kevin said as he looked at the speech again. “I like the bit about how you giving her a hibiscus plant to keep the hummingbirds coming back when she got sick helped you learn how to take care of them.”

“Lead with a heartwarming story,” the ravenette shrugged and Kevin snorted.

“If you can’t make them laugh, make them cry,” he grinned and Edd threw a pillow at him that Kevin caught with an expert hand, tossed back on the bed and then laid down on it as comfortable as a church mouse in a worn pew cushion.

“Anyways,” Edd sighed as he looked around for his botany folder for a few notes to add to the speech, while Kevin went back to his readings for he and Eddy’s shared econ class.

“I’m just saying,” Kevin said from behind the book on his chest. “You’re not a comedian, but you can tell a good story. Always go with your strengths.”

“Uh huh.”

Kevin looked over the book to see a nervous hand jotting more notes on index cards and shook his head.

“How about we binge some Stranger Things?”

Edd shook his head as he shook his nerves off.

“The Punisher?”

Another head shake.

“How To Get Away With Murder?”

No response.

“Johnny Bravo?” Kevin asked, thinking something lighter would ease Edd’s frazzled mind.

Edd turned and looked into concerned green eyes and hoped he could contain himself.

Growing up together made their friendship close, way too many drunken high school and then college parties sparked conversations and feelings.

But the feelings were hesitant on Edd’s part as being friends had worked so well and he couldn’t bear to think what would happen if he lost that part of who they were because they couldn’t work out the romance, especially since they lived together in a house with their very best friends.

If it all fell apart, there was no way they’d recover and the mere idea of it broke Edd’s heart.

Then Kevin came to the literal rescue when he picked Edd up from the side of the road in the middle of a snow storm last winter.

Eddy was too busy working to be of much help and Ed was stuck at home with Sarah and a gaggle of her friends so he couldn’t even think to venture out without Sarah tattling on him about it.

At least that was what Edd told everyone.

Kevin was first on his list because he knew that not only would Kevin come, he could help.

The blinding snow made the ditch invisible but the oncoming semi’s lights weren’t.

Edd’s car was totaled, but Kevin’s truck managed to get him out of the ditch and back to town.

He helped him navigate his insurance claim and then was there as a sounding board when he bought his next car.

They all knew Kevin would do anything for his friends, but this went way above and beyond the call of duty and Edd was put on notice.

A home cooked meal was his thanks, they binged Jessica Jones in Kevin’s bed til they fell asleep, and waking up in Kevin’s arms had Edd in a bit of a state for a good week before he stormed into the bathroom when Kevin was taking a shower and demanded answers.

He got a hug and a kiss on the cheek while the redhead lined up his beard before he got the same, you know how I feel speech Kevin had been giving him since sophomore year and Edd almost slapped him.

Kevin ignored his sputtering about how that wasn’t it as he got dressed, not accepting his straightforward answer because wasn’t this supposed to be complicated?

“You know I hate bullshit, Eddward,” Kevin had told him. “You asked, I answered. What more do you want?!”

Edd let out a frustrated scream before storming out of the bathroom and slamming his bedroom door.

A knock came to it a good ten seconds later and when he went to answer it and tell Kevin to shove his bullshit where the sun didn’t shine, he was silenced by a kiss.

“Now do you believe me?!” Kevin had said.

Green eyes that were desperate to be believed met his stunned own and the next thing he knew they were in a tussle in his bed, Kevin’s hands were under his beanie, clutching at ebony silken strands of hair, while Edd wrapped his arms around strong shoulders and held on as he couldn’t believe what was happening but didn’t want it to stop.

Ed knocked fifteen minutes later and when Edd finally opened the door ten minutes later, he couldn’t hide the disbelief in his hazel eyes at the sight of both of his friends and Edd’s bed rumpled and looking like they enjoyed doing it, but he didn’t say anything about it and just handed him the house phone and told him his grandmother was calling.

Kevin brightened up at the mention of the woman who essentially cock blocked him because everyone knew that Edd loved the woman like they all loved jawbreakers, but rarely spoke to her because she lived in France.

They bitched about her son, his absent father, he complained about work and bragged a bit about school, she told him to get a boyfriend and adopt her some grandpuppies.

An hour later, between the conversation with his grandmother, and the Kevin induced endorphin's in his system, his mood was better, but he knew he and Kevin needed to have a talk.

They shouldn’t.

They couldn’t.

They wouldn’t.

They did it anyways.

It wasn’t just that the sex was incredible, but their friendship didn’t really change all that much, so why stop a good thing?

Except with the good comes the bad, and the bad was just making everything messy, messy, messy!

Ed said they were caring more, but Edd would counter that as friendships grow, one would start to care more deeply for the other person so that was bound to happen anyways.

But the caring more would lead to petty arguments, taking any chance to annoy the absolute ever loving shit out of the other, monopolize their time so unworthy people, even their friends, wouldn’t get it, too.

When they refused to say they were more than friends or even friends with benefits, Sarah’s crush on Kevin became more than obvious and even Eddy told her to chill.

Nazz was perturbed that she was confused by it all and instead of being straightforward, she would do petty shit, like whine about Edd letting Kevin get away with not doing his chores, make more of a mess so everyone would have to do more of their own chores, wrangle Kevin into tutoring her in her core classes that he was absolutely clueless on, and just barging into Edd’s and Kevin’s rooms randomly.

And Eddy was his usual sullen self.

But his lack of knocking on Edd’s door went way up.

All of their feelings got messy as the entire dynamic of the house changed because of Kevin and Edd’s random nonsense with each other and over the summer, they mutually decided that while they did like like each other, they loved each other as friends and would remain as such.

Even best friends.

This decision brought things back to normal as the underlying sexual tension was gone.

For the moment anyways.

School started a month ago, and with their futures looming in front of them, everyone was stressed out to the max!

Ed was balancing work, school, and a filmography internship that he was hoping would lead to his first real job in a production studio.

Kevin and Eddy both were vying for internships with some pretty big companies, Eddy in Texas, Kevin in California.

Nazz was thisclose to parlaying her job as the assistant intern producer of the afternoon show at the Top 40 station in town into a real thing.

Sarah was a junior, and still had time to decide what she wanted to do, but her internship applications from fashion design programs in New York and LA were piling up.

And Edd was torn between staying on at the botany lab at the school and starting grad school right away or taking a year off to head to Costa Rica to study the rain forest there with his own team thanks to a few good words from his ex lover.

Staying at school would be the easy thing to do, in the sense that he was well on his way to being accepted into the grad school, but a year off and as far away from everything and everyone as possible would help him recover from the pain of losing all of his friends all at once.

It’s been damn near a year since that first talk, and a good three months since their last.

And yet, here he is again, staring into those eyes, feeling feelings.

“I just need to get this done, okay?”

Kevin’s eye sparkled their usual deep concern for him as he nodded and went back to his reading, and fresh sense of relief rolled off of Edd as he organized his speech, took the online quiz for his African American History class, uploaded the meeting notes for Anime Club and announced with glee that they would be watching a fan dubbed version of Evangelion at their next meeting, and logged Kevin’s attendance in he and Ed’s shared Business Law class that he skipped to sleep in with Edd.

He emailed Johnny about the work schedule for all the assistant researchers, his lab report to his research director, thankful the man was a consummate professional and that no one but themselves and Ed knew what happened last fall, Kevin’s mother about his birthday plans in two weeks during homecoming weekend, and the cemetery his mother was interned at to make sure his monthly flower delivery for her plot had been taken care of.

When he finally closed his laptop, he turned to see Kevin lying still with his textbook over his face.

“Kev?” He whispered as he shook the redhead’s leg and Kevin sighed as he said, “I’m awake.”

His tone was as bright as it ever was when he was awake but his mind was clouded and Edd couldn’t help but care.

“Everything alright?”

“Yep,” the redhead droned, but didn’t move.

“Then get up,” he huffed as he shoved his side, but Kevin barely moved.

“Can’t.”

“Why not?” Edd snipped as he set about cleaning up and organizing his study and homework materials for class in the morning.

“Because I’m learning by osmosis.”

Edd cackled as he put his things on his desk, walked back over to the bed, and took the textbook off his face.

But his snickering died away when he saw the look on Kevin’s face; thoughtful and hopeful.

And the piece of himself that would always cave for him fell. apart.

The book was tossed on the floor, and they pulled themselves towards each other in a hug that was so intimate that it only occurred behind closed doors.

An embarrassing whine left him as Kevin nuzzled his neck, but like he always did, he pulled away to look into bright blue eyes desperate for love and affection but too scared to give it.

It was all the permission he would ever need.

The kiss that followed was frantic and Edd was sure he would have to hem the broken seams in Kevin’s hoodie that he ripped apart as he tugged the warm piece of clothing away.

The sound of his belt buckle hitting the floor when his khakis were tossed away was like wind chimes announcing the arrival of a longed for guest who never wanted to leave.

The main thing that made him truly question why anyone thought that it was such a terrible idea to have sex with a friend was the fact that Kevin was the most giving lover he had ever had.

And ever would.

The hands that would toss out pitchers with laser like precision, knew his body better than he or anyone else.

The scruff of the beard he took to wearing lately contrasted with lips as soft as the inside of a damn rose petal and it was fucking intoxicating.

Gentle fingers would caress the scar in his scalp that doctors had to cut into when he was two to remove the tumor that was sucking the life out of him as his hands grasped onto thick, satin locks as red as the sunset and the passion he lived his life in.

The mouth that could tell dirty jokes he learned in the Irish pub his grandparent’s owned back in Dublin, break down the nonsense that was Eddy’s business plans with ease, and awakened feelings with a word and a Colgate smile kissed him all over.

The bed rocked when that mouth swallowed him whole and the quiet room echoed with a scream of a name that never left their rooms.

“Pumpkin!”

He held the underside of his headboard, but without his hands in Kevin’s hair to guide him through the act, Kevin took his time to experiment.

Teeny tiny kisses to the head of his dick made chills run down his spine.

A wide lick from the head to his testicles made him gasp, but when Kevin’s hot breath reached what dozens of rounds of chemotherapy on his tiny toddler body essentially killed, his voice cracked with a sob.

His mind blanked when Kevin mouthed his whole sac like a damn peach.

And he just laid there limply for a moment as Kevin nuzzled the insides of his thighs, only coming back to life when his lips touched his cock again.

Eager green eyes met his own and he giggled as his hands eased into Kevin’s hair again, letting himself go while his friend held his everything in a place that told him no lies.

He had been needing this more than he let on and Kevin knew it so he took his time.

Time was lost to them as Kevin took care of him as only he knew how.

He held back on letting him cum right way by occasionally replacing his hand with his mouth so he could kiss him again.

Kevin couldn’t talk dirty to save his life, but holy hell the compliments.

“My little Einstein.”

“God, you’re so perfect.”

“Who’s Daddy’s Baby Boy?”

“Look at me and let it out.”

“You taste just like candy.”

“Pumpkin’s got you.”

In Kevin’s hands he knew he’d be just fine, when Pumpkin showed up, he knew he didn’t have to worry about anything ever again.

Despite Pumpkin sometimes showing up more often than he’d like, even in public, especially in public, to White Knight himself into any given situation, he still couldn’t resist him.

So he didn’t.

They barely registered the front door opening after Kevin sent him over the edge with his hand, his mouth, and those pretty green eyes.

He was just about to let Kevin pull him into his lap when his door burst open with Sarah and Nazz tumbling in and going on about how crazy the movie was.

They all froze for a brief second, but when Nazz tossed him a dirty look as she set her mouth to say something and Kevin pulled away, he pushed him back into the bed, turned to his rude ass roommates and said two words.

“GET. OUT.”

The venom in his voice and the homicidal look in his ice blue eyes sent them running back down the stairs after slamming the door so hard the room shook.

“Maybe we should -,” Kevin began and Edd shut him up with a harsh, but needy kiss.

“Shut up.”

“Okay.”

Strong hands stroked his sides for a bit as his fury started to ebb, but the shaky panting of the man beneath him turned him on more than his friends and roommates lack of manners angered him.

Soft cerulean eyes pleaded with bright emerald and Kevin was back on his game.

He reached up for him and Edd leaned down for a kiss as both of their hands reached for Edd’s nightstand drawer.

Working together, they kissed, they touched, and when Kevin got him back where he wanted him before they had been so rudely interrupted, Edd made a mental note to have a house meeting about closed doors and arched his back as Kevin showed him how he really felt about him.

Again.

Naturally.

Slow hip rolls gave way to Edd riding him like he was his Harley; fast and hard.

The headboard hit the wall that he shared with Nazz and he couldn’t shut up.

“Fuck, yes! Just like that!”

“Harder, Daddy! HARDER!

“Give it to me, Goddamnit!”

On the one hand, he knew he was being a brat, but on the other, what happened behind closed doors between consenting individuals wasn’t anyone’s business and he was going to make sure that if anyone wanted into his room, they would have to get consent first, closed door or not.

If revenge was sweet, it tasted like Edd and nice compliments are nice.

He gave the ravenette a show and Edd let everyone in the house know it.

A scream for every hickey.

A cry for sweet baby Jesus Himself for every touch.

Kisses would silence only a little because under the cover of night, moans carried.

But far too soon, because it had been far too long, he reached his end and the delighted squeal that left him when he left reality made Ed snort and yell, “Good job, Kev!” as he came up the stairs and headed to his room to get some sleep.

No sooner than Kevin had pulled out of him, though, Edd was up and out of the bed.

Grabbing his briefs, he went to his door, opened it and yelled, “HOUSE MEETING! NOW!”

Kevin stared after him as he stormed down the stairs in nothing but his underpants and jumped up, grabbed his sweatpants and hoodie and stumbled after him as fast as his limp legs could carry him.

He shoved his hoodie over Edd’s head as they reached the bottom of the stairs and the other man sighed as he tugged it on, inspecting it for where the new tears were so he knew what exactly he’d have to repair soon.

A couple of minutes later, everyone sleepily tumbled into the living room, scared, but curious as to why Edd was calling a house meeting at 1AM.

“New rule,” he began after everyone but himself sat down, “if there is a closed door in front of you, pretend you’re fucking Opportunity and knock first. Oh, wait! That’s a current rule because it’s common fucking courtesy!”

“Common courtesy would be not boning your roommate, especially when everyone is at home,” Sarah snipped and Eddy rolled his eyes as Ed popped her upside the back of her head.

“Common courtesy would be minding your own fucking business, Sarah,” Edd retorted as he did his best to catch her hazel eyed glare, but she wouldn’t look at him.

“It is her business when y’all let y’all’s bullshit into the house,” Nazz snipped as she gave him a dirty once over.

“You may have noticed that I gave zero fucks when you two were beefing over who’s turn it was to do laundry, even though Sarah’s job requires her to be in a clean uniform every day,” Edd quipped back.

“What the fuck does that have to do with anything?!” The blond exclaimed and Edd smugly grinned, which means the other Eds and Kevin are terrified.

“Because her job pays regular bills in this house because she’s the only one of us with steady paycheck because she’s salaried. So I would kinda appreciate it if she was allowed space to make sure she could go to that lovely job every day.”

Nazz shut her mouth and Edd could tell his point was taken but he wasn’t quite done.

“We all have shit. I always thought that we were adult enough to fucking handle it. Apparently not. So from here on in, if you don’t fucking knock on mine or anyone else’s door for as long as you live here, I’m not only not going to knock, either, but your ass best believe that I will be making my home in your space til I damn well feel like leaving because obviously just because anyone can live here, we can all do whatever we want.”

“Do. Not,” Eddy said slowly as he sat up and gave Edd his trademark don’t fuck with me glare.

“Then. Fucking. Knock,” Edd said in a tone that matched Eddy’s face. Seeing that his point had been made as embarrassment settled in guilty eyes, he heaved a sigh and the afterglow he should have been lying in right now knocked on his heart and mind. “Let’s go, Kevin,” he said as he stormed back up the stairs.

Kevin gave a quick glance at everyone else in the room, and while everyone but Ed looked mad at him, he couldn’t bring himself to care because Edd was right.

“Kevin!”

Kevin shot up the stairs and Ed stood and stretched before following after him, shaking his head at the remaining three in the room.

“Ugh, rude,” Sarah mumbled as just two sets of doors slammed and the house grew quiet again.

But Edd’s room was far from quiet.

As soon as Kevin walked back in the room, closed and then locked the door, Edd shoved him on the bed before straddling him and attacking his neck.

“Eddward,” Kevin hissed at him but he didn’t stop him.

“Pants. Off,” Edd ordered as he tugged off the two pieces of clothing he had on.

“You want to go again?!” Kevin asked in a harsh whisper, surprised that Edd was up for it after what they had just done.

Lustful blue eyes sparkled at him and Kevin’s frightened and turned on all at once.

Edd didn’t cheer him on as vocally as he had done before, but Kevin repainted the scraped wall behind his headboard that weekend.

He ate up the silly compliments, encouragement, and soft touches.

He let himself take what he wanted and shoved every negative thought about it all out of his mind.

His hands wandered across the chest that held the heart that beat for him in a way he didn’t want it to, but he’ll be damned if it ever stopped.

He kissed him in such an enticing way that Kevin knew exactly why they name storms after people.

And why some storm names are retired, never to be used again.

The greed in his heart for the one who was tangled up with him in all the ways was being fed and Edd knew the greed was bad, but the heart wanted what it wanted, even when it couldn’t have it.

Life was just too complicated right now and they couldn’t be. But that didn’t mean that he couldn’t be there for him when he needed him.

And he always would be.

Kevin sat back a bit on his knees and rocked them both as he knocked one out of the park. Edd caught him as he fell and held on til they both calmed down.

Sarah’s regular pop hits list echoed from her Bluetooth speaker in the bathroom in the hall and Kevin groaned.

“Can you walk?”

He looked down to see a mischievous gapped tooth grin looking back at him and rolled his eyes.

“Yes, I can walk,” he huffed as he sat up. “But Sarah is in your shower.”

“Get my shirt,” Edd whispered as he swung his legs out of the bed and tiptoed to the door.

The shirt in question was an old Peach Creek varsity swim team tshirt he got as a freshman and never grew into because it was too big.

Kevin pulled the shirt out of his t-shirt drawer and then dug a clean pair of boxer briefs out of his underwear drawer. When he handed him the clothing items in his hand, Edd shot him an annoyed look, but his eyes glimmered a bit.

Like he’d ever turn down something Kevin thought he looked good in.

Kevin tugged on his sweats as Edd pulled on the shirt and they snuck out of Edd’s room and ran to Kevin’s.

Because Kevin’s aunt owned the house, Kevin got the master bedroom which had its own ensuite bath with an oversized tub/shower combo.

The girls got access when they had cramps, but Edd was the only other guy to ever sit in it with the redhead.

None of his past boyfriends ever lasted long enough for the romantic gesture, but even Eddy said that Edd was the only guy he ever spent anytime with that he actually cared about enough to let him stay more than a few hours in his room.

And as their college lives wound down, he was going to take as many moments with his friend as possible.

They took a quick shower before Kevin plugged up the tub and he had Edd lean his head into his chest, as he held him cross legged in his lap so he could rub his back as they waited for the tub to fill.

“Speech tomorrow?”

“Friday. Small group work is tomorrow.”

“With Dr Heinz?”

“Uh huh.”

“I swear he hates me.”

“He’s just trying to make us think critically,” Edd said of a professor he had for a literature class freshman year that they now had for general education composition class and to say Kevin and the man clashed was an understatement.

“I think just fine, thanks,” Kevin grumbled.

“You do,” Edd agreed, “but not everyone else does.”

A look of understanding crossed his face before he frowned and Edd could swear he thinking that someone or something was a Dork.

“Why I gotta be his example then?!”

“Why do you engage?”

“Hello,” Kevin said incredulously as he shut the water off, “participation points. And he started it.”

A laugh echoed in the bathroom that was lightly heard across the house and only Ed was able to ignore it.

“You’re a child.”

“Says the man that basically told everyone he was gonna shit on their lawn if they came into his room again.”

“All they need to do is knock,” Edd shrugged and Kevin sighed.

“True, but -”

“No buts!” Edd said firmly as he booped his nose. “Aren’t you sick of them trying to spy on us?”

“Yeah,” Kevin sighed, wondering if things would die down if they made it official.

“Well, I’m gonna, ‘shit on their lawn,’ as you so eloquently put it, if they don’t fucking knock.”

“Okay, okay,” Kevin snickered knowing that there was no changing Edd’s mind once he truly decided something.

You could try to convince him til the cows came home, but in the end, his word was his bond.

And that’s why Kevin loved him. Because no matter what happened between them, as long as he said he loved him, they would be okay.

Ed found them in Kevin’s bed the next morning, the door wide open, but he knocked anyway, rousing only Edd, who quickly got ready so they could go get coffee and breakfast at Eddy’s favorite coffee shop before class.

Edd knocked on Eddy’s door after he got ready, Ed leaning on the wall across from it, only for it to be answered by a grumpy Sarah and Eddy still asleep.

Edd shoved the girl to her room and Ed out the door, not looking forward to dinner at all.

Kevin woke up to a text that made him spend the night at his aunt’s.

Eddward: KNOCK BEFORE YOU COME IN.

#kevedd #kevedd fanfiction #reg!kevedd #reg!kev #reg!edd #kevin barr #eddward vincent #tumblr exclusive #life has many open doors ed boy #momma said knock you out #more like lock you out but whatever

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babybyu-blog1 · 7 years

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WANNA ONE as your Older Brother [pt.1]

Kang Daniel - You are that one famous person in neighborhood to be younger sister of Daniel, especially among Daniel’s friends since he is hella friendly. - He’s the type that gonna bring his friends home, along with some snack, french fries and drinks. - He and his friends will all scattered in living room, some lying down, some in sofa, focused in their video game (and that random curses scream) - You actually don’t really care about it all - Except when you feel sudden hunger and you gotta deal with you covering your hommies shortpants and tanktop just to go to kitchen. - “(y/n) bring me water along with you.” - “(y/n)!!!!!!!!! Come downstairs its important!! HELP!!!” - “WHAT?” - “cook some food for me.”/giggles/ - and you swear you want to choke him but can’t coz youre way TOO SMOL beside him. - the type that freely movable around the house SHIRTLESS in summer when the heat turns too hot. - not really careless, but not really interfering your personal life also. - I mean sometimes he really sweet to listen to you but he ended up giggling and telling you not to worry cosz everythings gonna be okay

Park Jihoon - You also become famous in neighborhood to be jihoons younger sister, it all since jihoons wayy tooo handsome and everybody wants to get close to him, through you. - jihoon is shy and awkward with stranger but actually HE IS NOT. - he sometimes bragging how you are even single while you have an amazingly-famous-handsome brother like him - hes the type that order you around - “(y/n) buy me the choco drink near your school. Pay with your money first, ill pay you back later.” - and he ended up not paying you back at all. - you avoid hanging out with him too much since everyones gonna stare at both of you. - even the supermarket cashier says you two looked good together. - you laugh awkwardly “thankyou but he is my brother.”

Ha Sungwoon - with him you gotta win an Worldwide Patience Competition. - “Wheres my glasses??” - “Saw it in TV cabinet tho???” - “Thats why I never let you touch my stuff.” - “??????????????” - him being bossy. - “Where do I put the key?” - “I dont know.” - “Find it.” - “I.dont.even.touch.it.” - “Or Im not taking you to your course.” - but with him too everything becomes so easy. - like you can ask why your laptop isnt working and he will fix it, also like - “this is easy tho, what do u do if Im not here.”

Lai Guanlin - Isolated himself in his room with hip hop music turned on out loud - Not gonna let you enter his room easily /which youre also prefer not to/ - You both not talking too much, unless if its necessary and important things. - He usually coming home late coz basketball- - also active in english and many other sport club - Which makes him extremely famous among gurls in his school, even another school - have so many fans but he often not giving any dem care about it - known as COLD AND HANDSOME PRINCE

Bae Jinyoung - the shy and quite one among your family - like you really really rare to fight with him - since he never mischievous toward you so you like and adore him so much - actually really caring and loving - the type that really hyped when it comes to his most favorite things - “i have new dvd, u want to watch it together?” - and you both ended up watching movies together in the living room peacefully

#wanna one imagine #wannaone imagines #wanna one scenarios #oppa #older brother

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lithugraph · 7 years

Text

5 Things Meme

I was tagged by @nyhne. Thanks! I tag @a-study-in-shakespeare 5 Things in My Bag • a shit-ton of pens -- if I don't have at least with me at all times, then what's the point? • a shit-ton of gum wrappers -- I will literally stick my gum wrappers in my bag despite there being a trash can three feet away. It's just one of my...things. • various forms of ID -- school, work, driver's license • my handy dandy multi-tool -- bigger and better than a Swiss Army knife and waaaaay more useful. When I switch out bags, I feel naked if I forget my multi-tool • a calculator -- again, something I always feel like I need even tho my phone has a calculator on it?? 5 Things in My Room • Christmas lights • An ancient keyboard that belonged to my aunt-in-law that pretty much helped launch her music production career. But the amp and some of the controls are shot and I still can't decide what to do with it. I'd rather practice on the piano downstairs and we'd have to get some adapters and software and stuff to make this thing compatible with out laptops if we were to start recording our own music because this keyboard is from the 70s. • An original lithograph print I bought at an art show one year at school • A dwindling stack of to-be-read books that are actually being read! • My copy of The Death of Ivan Iliich that I bought from an antique book dealer when I visited Savannah, Georgia. It was the only thing in that shop I could afford -- and it lists the author as Count Lyof Tolstoi, which I thought was pretty cool. It also includes two other short stories by unknown authors and advertisements for other books and publishers in the back. I think it was published in the 1890s? 5 Things I Want to Do in My Life • attend a Hack-a-thon • get a cover-up tattoo for the one on my ankle. I was 19 when I got it, and I liked it at the time. But now, not so much. • travel across Europe with my two best friends • pass my certification test(s) • visit Asia 5 Things I'm Currently Into • ethical hacking • cryptography • learning French and Russian • I've been getting back into exercising and try to do a few exercises in the evening. I can't wait for the weather to start cooling off and the humidity to go away so I can start taking walks/jogging in the morning. • sewing my own skirts. I've made four so far, and I've found some cool patterns for shirts I haven't tried yet. 5 Things in My To-Do List • write • finish homework • update my résumé • make posters for an upcoming movie night my math club is sponsoring • maybe get a haircut?? I'm still undecided....

#5 things #memes

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lexpistachio · 7 years

Text

just jackparse - a ficrec

for my sister who requested this rec 82 years ago. special thanks for those who painstakingly linked me new fics in my askbox. you’re the real mvp!

some things first:

divided into AU, pre-canon, canon/canon divergence, and future

word length categorized as

short fic = less than 10,000 words medium = 10,000 - 20,000 words long = 20,000 - 60,000 words novel length = 60,000 - 100,000 words

format as follows:

title - author | rating | length | various tags | gratutious commentary by me

summary

just ctrl+f if you wanna find by rating (e.g search for: long) or other tags (eg. smut, humor, au)

★ are personal faves

some liberty was taken in rating fics that are not rated

might update in the future; if i missed something, i’ll be happy to read your rec!

Kent pressed his fingers into his eyes until his vision swam for reasons other than the salty tears welling up in them. “Are you seriously asking me to fly across the goddamn country to hold your hand while you cut me out of your life?” me: you know what this fandom needs? me: an eternal sunshine au me: only without the happy ending

I’ve Been Closing My Eyes by perfectpro ★ - teen | long | inception au | angst | you don't understand how much love i have for this fic. SO MUCH LVOE

Jack Zimmermann? You worked with him and Kent Parson together? What happened?” Bitty asks before he can help himself.

Everyone’s heard the stories. Parse and Zimms, taking the world of dream share by storm, trained by Dominic Cobb himself. Ten years later, no one’s heard from either in two years.

Shrugging his shoulders, Shitty tries to think of how to phrase it. “No one comes out of Limbo the same.”

Kent knew about superstitions before he made it to hockey. He knew about black cats and broken mirrors. About stepping on cracks and throwing pinches of salt over his shoulder. Kent knew about magic before he found hockey.

Jack hums and smiles, but otherwise doesn’t respond. They sit in silence, and he bites his tongue to keep from saying anything. There is no sense disrupting this fragile peace that they have.

Here is the deal he has made with himself: Jack is forbidden, until after the curse of the seventeenth summer. Kent does not want to do anything to let the gods know how they could hurt him the worst.

why do we fall? by sparklyslug - teen | short | touch telepath! jack au | epikegster | angst

“Didja miss me?” Kent had asked / looking strong/ look good/ looking happy/I could stand here all night and all day and just look at you/ and Jack’s control had crumbled, jerked him out of step with time and out into the swirling minds of the college kids filling their house, his consciousness sent running by the brightness in his own chest.

Corporal Kenny,” Jack huffed into Kent’s ear. The arms around his waist tightened.

“Captain Jack,” Kent teased right back. “You outrank me, Zimms.”

The Daily Grind by JaneJHills - mature | long | abandoned wip | the coffeeshop au that was foretold

It’s not that Jack wasn’t into relationships; it’s just that Jack wasn’t a relationships kind of guy.

maybe i’m falling for you by madameofmusic - teen | short | coffeeshop au | this is really cute <3 i too lament the lack of more cutesy coffeeshop aus from this ship. this one’s great tho

Jack’s normal coffee shop relocates, and he’s forced to start buying from the cat-themed coffee shop down the street, Catppuccino. It’s cheesy as hell, but the coffee’s good, and the "purrista” better. Jack doesn’t miss the old shop.

“Shush,” Kent says. “What have you got that says, like, thanks for not judging me when I get wasted on Moscato and pass out on your couch, and also sorry about that? Hypothetically.”

“Hypothetically,” says the florist, lips quirking, “I’d recommend either white tulips or blue hyacinths.”

Even the plainest of the plain shall deign to reign (and boy, you're reigning over me) by exbex - gen | short | high school au | chubby!jack | kent pining over shy jack is cute, yes

Lardo looks at Kent with the most knowing look he’s ever seen aside from his own mother’s. “Kent,” she finally replies, “I like you Bro. So I’m going to give you the following information. Information, which, I assure you, is publicly available. Jack, who transferred in weeks ago, Oh Unobservant One, knows me through GSA. Jack is not straight. Jack likes hockey, among other things. And that is all the emotional labor that I am doing for free.”

Shitty found Kent on the porch. “Saw your girl here,” he said. “Can’t believe you actually got her to come to a party.”

“She’s not my girl,” said Kent, trying not to blush.

“She should be,” Shitty said, smiling and leaning against the railing. “Blind man could see the way you look at her, and you’re the only person she likes at school.”

Twenty Feet Back by floatingstark - mature | short | wip | daddy!jack au as in literally-a-dad-jack

Kent is aware this is a little odd; he’s standing behind some trees on the other side of the park, pretending to stretch but actually just high-key spying on a hot dad and his kid.

i'll be your platinum by achilleees ★ - explicit | medium | sugar daddy!jack au | daddy kink | angst and fluff | this is the one daddy kink fic that made me swoon, it's the banter and the way they fall for each other slowly that takes my breath away | sorta sequels here and here | better yet, read all the entire unrelated daddykink series she wrote

Wicks took a deep breath, then let out in a rush, “So I’ve been catfishing this dude online with your pictures so he’ll buy me free stuff, only now he wants to meet in person to hand off the suit jacket I need for Ginger’s wedding tomorrow, so I need you to meet him outside the Burberry at the Copley mall tonight to pick it up for me.”

Kent couldn’t speak for a minute, because he was laughing too hard.

here in the present tense by achilleees ★ - teen | short | soulmate au | bodyswap |

Jack isn’t really sure what he was expecting when he went to sleep on August 2.

Kind of. Or maybe he just doesn’t want to admit that he genuinely thought he’d wake up in Georgia, in those checker-patterned, sunlight-limned sheets. That he’d go downstairs and hear Suzanne Bittle bustling around in the kitchen, and greet her wearing her son’s socks and his pajamas and his sweet, bashful blush.

Dynamite Boy by TomatoBird - gen | short | wreck it ralph au | glitch!jack | the concept is genius, i’d gladly read 50k more words of this

In which Jack is simultaneously a glitch, a child of champions, and an aspiring player in Hero’s Duty, and Kent is just someone he happens to meet along the way.

“You don’t have to trust me,” Kent said, “you just have to let me do this.”

Jack has spent many years away from his father's court. Now he must return to wed Kent Parson at last, with all those years and hurts between them. It's not pretty.

the light of all lights by decinq - mature | short | vampires au | look, it's not endgame and has open-ended j/b ugh but i feel like every ficrec should have at least one vampire au

Jack says, “Would you rather be able to fly or have super speed.”

The corners of Kent’s mouth tug into a small smile, and he says, “Compared to you, I do have super speed.”

Jack elbows him, hard. Jack asks, “What about being able to see the future?”

Kent thinks, they’ll end the movie here.

The story, of course, goes on.

rentboy jack and his nhl star boyfriend series by achilleees - rentboy!jack | prostitution au |

so put it on me - explicit | short | pining | smut

It will be a cold day in hell before Kent has the fortitude to say no to that pout.

“Ugh,” he says. “It’s just a dumb fantasy, man, it doesn’t matter.”

Jack cocks his head at him. “I am in the business of fulfilling fantasies,” he says. or, eloquently summed up by a friend: "Ugh poor Kent is so in love"

all the hearts they're messing with - teen | short | angst and fluff | trade |

As soon as Kent gets home, he pulls out a pad of paper and a pen and makes a list of his options.

1. Tell Jack you got traded. Get dumped. Cry in your cheerios.2. Hide from Jack that you were traded. Buy out (?) the Vegas media so they don’t cover the story. Bribe NHL.com Break Jack’s laptop so he can’t read NHL.com anymore. Fly back on off-days (?). Have plan fall through because plan is dumb. Get dumped. Cry in cheerios.

“Are you mad at me?” Kent says.

Jack meets his eyes in the mirror, gaze stormy.

“I’m just trying to get along with your parents,” says Kent. “I thought that’s why you brought me here.”

Second Chance by bittlebunny - mature | short | blind date au

“I know, I’m sorry.” Jack repeats. “It was wrong. I just didn’t know what to do, I don’t usually do that type of thing.”

“You should more often. You know you could probably get laid every night if you wanted to?”

Jack blushes and looks down into his black coffee, not quite agreeing with that sentiment.

This is a 16-fic series that centers around Jack and Kent and their history and their future. It follows canon, with one major difference; Bitty decided not to go to Samwell. Each fic is named after and based around a song on the Deluxe version of Troye Sivan’s album Blue Neighborhood. The first two fics are chronological, because they’re in the fic’s current time (2018) in the frame of the story. Most of the fics in the series are told through flashbacks and time jumps, though, and the stories switch back and forth between Jack and Kent’s perspectives.

pre-canon

meet you in the middle by madameofmusic - teen | short | pre-slash

Kent meets Jack Zimmermann for the first time.

A lot of things can happen if a cat is set loose in an ice rink; Kent never thought this would be one of them.

Or: “I may have brought my pet to the rink by accident and it may have escaped you have to help me.” AU

it’s too close for comfort by achilleees - teen | short | pre-slash | cats

“Go suck your own dick,” Parse grumbled. “I’ma find the cat.” Both pairs of shoes wandered away, and Jack was almost relieved until suddenly, without warning, the high tops came back and light flooded his sanctuary as someone crouched and lifted the hem of the tablecloth.

“Hey, you,” Parse said to either Jack or the cat, he couldn’t tell.

the bluest things on earth by blazeofglory - gen | short | drabble | pre-slash

Kent Parson isn't gay, he isn't, but there's... There's something about Jack Zimmermann.

Even though they're linemates, Jack doesn't know Kent all that well. He certainly doesn't expect the American to come look after him when he's unwell on their first roadie.

Count on It by bienenalster - gen | short | pre-slash | codependency | world juniors

Specifically, in which Jack and Kent fail at playing against each other.

Generally, in which Jack and Kent fail at being reasonable human beings. Or, the lighter side of codependency.

Smoke Gets in Your Eyes by bienenalster, Pax - teen | short | pre-slash maybe | mutual enabling

Jack can appreciate a good game of beer pong in someone's basement, especially when Parse is on his team, one arm around his shoulder as he tries to get Jack to miss his shot.

(Jack never really understood how Parse can just turn it off like that. If you want to win on the ice, then you should want to win all the time. Even at stupid things, like beer pong.)

(Jack has never considered the possibility that beer pong might not be the only game Parse is playing.)

but then his hands roamed by defcontwo - teen | short | first kiss

Jack’s hand pressed into the small of Parse’s back during team meetings, where no one else can see, and Parse toppling into Jack’s lap whenever he gets drunk enough that no one will blink twice at it.

A game of chicken, or a game of chance. Jack doesn’t know which one it’s going to be just yet.

you're neck and neck or cheek to cheek by punkpadfoot - teen | short | first kiss | i'm in love with the author's style of writing, and i love the tentativeness in this fic--they're shy and hesitant; their dilemma feels true

Kent’s always been fairly affectionate, but this thing with Jack is something else entirely.

the spark in your eyes, the look on your face by oscarmild - teen | short | drabble

Jack knows that Kent is his friend- his best friend, even. But lately, it’s been starting to feel like more than just friends.

Insults for Your Lovers by SummerFrost - teen | short | inter-class | social class difference | friends to lovers

Things Jack has: Brand new yellow sneakers, an expensive truck, Kent Parson.

Things Kent has: Converse with holes in them, riding shotgun, Jack Zimmermann.

Count on It by bienenalster - gen | short | preslash | codependency | world juniors

Specifically, in which Jack and Kent fail at playing against each other.

Generally, in which Jack and Kent fail at being reasonable human beings. Or, the lighter side of codependency.

What's Better Than This? Just Guys Bein' Dudes by Bittyybee (sunlight) - mature | short | massages | first kiss | ust

Kent's shoulders hurt. Jack gives good massages.

Kent spends the beginning of his summer with hockey prodigy/best friend Jack Zimmermann because they're young and they can and Kent likes getting free things.

"I know how you get all psycho near a game, don't worry. Just uh- maybe find a healthy way to release that frustration." Kate suggested as she turned and winked at Jacq. "Y'know what I mean?"

"Not hockey?" Jacq asked confused.

"Not hockey." Kate repeated, meeting Jacqs eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

its pimms cis swap smut!! enjoy!!

A Quiet Kind of Intimacy by alpha_exodus - explicit | short | first time | smut | photography

Jack doesn't really care about having a roommate on this roadie - that is, until he heads to his room and finds out his roommate is Kent Parson.

touches my foolish heart by foxfireflamequeen - explicit | short | first time | pwp

“That,” says Kent. “Was the most uncool moment of my life.”

Jack’s still laughing, the fucker.

First by omgericzimmermann - gen | short | first times | drabble | fluff and angst

They were just kids.

They were so young that everything was a first.

tear at the seams by defcontwo - mature | short | drabble | angsty smut

This is what Jack lives for: The second he touches down on the ice, his mind clears. For sixty minutes, he is nothing but a blank slate, a white board that fills itself up with plays and tactics, a steady hand on the stick and a heart that beats for nothing else.

So he sits next to Jack on roadies, bumping their shoulders together amicably as Jack chews on his lip and stares out the window at the passing scenery. He leans into every casual touch - Jack’s gloved hand on his back, their skates knocking together on the bench. Seeks him out on the ice, feeling a thrill when their passes connect effortlessly; slams him into the boards after game-winning goals, their teammates piling up around them but it’s Kent’s fist clutching the back of Jack’s jersey, Kent’s voice yelling in Jack’s ear.

If Jack notices, he doesn’t say anything.

Kent still hopes.

Good Things Ahead by perfectpro - teen | short | fwb

Jack doesn't want to go to a party, but Kent's pretty sure that he can be convinced.

Mutually Assured by Verbyna - teen | short | codependency | has kent/ofc | angst

The smile on Kent’s face is all wrong. He fixes it.

we gaze up at the stars above our heads by alyssakate - teen | short | fluff (mostly)

I don’t know if we’ll ever see each other again, or when we meet our ends, but please just let me hold your hand.

There's thirty-four days of what feels like an endless summer stretched between the Memorial Cup and the NHL draft. Thirty-four days days of each other. Thirty-four days left.

four strong winds by defcontwo - teen | short | fluff with an angsty ending? (a tag that could be patented to this ship that's for sure) | i just love my teenage boys on dates and living in the moment ok

The sales pitch is irrelevant: this moment right here, sitting in the front of Kent’s piece of shit pickup truck, listening to “Party in the USA” on the radio at top volume – that’s all the convincing Jack ever needed.

Or: Kent and Jack, a carnival, and the last gasp of the 34 days.

follow my lead by mardia - explicit | short | the seduction of jack zimmermann | kent here is wily but his conviction is compelling | podfic available

Kent likes to have his fun, likes to mess with people, but there's something about messing with Jack that's just so deeply satisfying for him. He can poke and poke and he'll get a reaction every single time. No matter what, no matter how blatant Kent gets or how he pushes it, he'll get that same wide-eyed disbelieving stare, that same red blush staining Jack's cheeks.

New things by robokittens - explicit | short | smut | pwp

"Jack," Kent mumbles into Jack's neck. "I wanna try something."

wax/wane - explicit | short | angst | smut

Things will come full circle for Kent – he's sure of it.

party pieces by familiar - explicit | short | smut | pwp | painplay

From the early 2008 so-bad-it's-good sex idea vault: "It’s just him and Kent and the really stupid idea that was beating his ass raw with a hockey stick." Gotta hit it with something, you know?

search the world for something else by somehowunbroken - mature | short | second person POV | angst | au

Your name is Jack Zimmermann, and you were born into hockey.

Ode to Joy by coyotesuspect - mature | short | drunk sex

December 31st, 2008. Parse has a good feeling about the new year.

mess you made by schwule - mature | short | angst

Jack’s life hasn’t been very exciting, despite what people may think. Kent might just be the most thrilling thing that’s ever happened to him.

only time is ours by thistidalwave - mature | short | angst

Jack always feels like he’s running. Running to catch up. Running to get ahead. Lungs burning. Legs about to give out. Falling behind, behind, behind. Coming in dead last, even when he hits the finish line before anyone else.

Leaving Me Stranded by mardia - explicit | short

Jack’s dad and Kent really get along great. Which isn’t a surprise, they’re basically the same sort of person--outgoing, funny, always ready with a story or joke--so when Kent comes out to dinner with Jack and his family, it’s basically those two monopolizing the conversation for the entire meal.

an empty room by quietest_one - explicit | short | smut | established relationship

The Combine is a mad rush of a long weekend, painfully sober, gloriously exhausting. Kent is on the road to reaching his dreams, and he's taking Jack along for the ride. (Or, two boys exchange handjobs around the back of a gym. Whichever you prefer.)

the heart is a risky fuel to burn by idrilka - mature | fluff and angst | established relationship

Montreal in summer is hot as hell, the heat sticky and clinging to the skin. (There were the thirty-four days in the summer of 2009, between winning the Memorial Cup and the NHL Entry Draft in Montreal, where things were perfect. This is one of those days.)

let me feel i'm falling safely to the ground by natscribbles - mature | short

Kent doesn't know which what ifs are more dangerous, can't tell which ones hurt the most.

I Love You, He Thinks by blithelybonny - teen | short

It's the night before the draft, and Kent knows that this is probably the end.

my versailles at night by thistidalwave - teen | short | au | first kiss

But now—now it’s the quiet of the early morning, they just won the Memorial Cup, and Jack doesn’t want to let this moment pass him by.

where we went by speedboat - mature | short | dysfunctional relationship

Once in the car, Kent does three things: he googles "valium+vodka"; he shakes Jack awake; and he takes a napkin and wipes the tears away from Jack's face.

or: Parse was the one who found Jack during his overdose.

or: In Defense of Kent Parson.

34 days by thistidalwave - explicit | short | fluff and angst

There were the 34 days in the summer of 2009, between winning the Memorial Cup and the NHL Entry Draft in Montreal, where things were perfect. Who wouldn’t want that back?

it's the stars that score by perfectpro - mature | medium | angst

It’s a week until the NHL draft. A week until he stops competing with Kent and starts competing against him. A week until he finds out if his dad’s name carries more weight than Kent’s skill does, and Jack sometimes has a hard time breathing when he starts thinking about it.

It’s why he tries not to think about it.

Three Words, Repeated by Freudianity - explicit | short | fluff with an angsty ending

5+1 Five times Jack told Kent he loved him, and one time he didn't.

to you he is a room by punkpadfoot - teen | short | angst | kent pov to the story followed by the next in this list

He’s happy now—the weather is warm and the grass is soft and there’s still a pleasant buzz in his head. Jack is close enough to touch. Right now, summer’s end feels distant, less of a looming presence and more of an exit they’ve yet to reach.

to them he is a mirror by misandrywitch - teen | short | angst | jack pov to the story which precedes this in this list

All Jack knows is that after this summer, everything is going to be different.

larger than life by Verbyna - teen | short | also helpfully tagged as: the making of Kent "Victory" Parson“

Everything feels like the end of the world when it happens. No one can see the future, so it’s hard to believe it exists.”

Kent’s dad wasn’t always right, but he was right about that.

if you are looking for the demons that play well with your own by storiesfromtheden - gen | short | angst

Kent spent years counting the things that were not right.

Like A Missing Limb series by thatallone - teen | short | angst | suicide attempt

Without You

Prompt: "You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.”

[delete]

Kent typed out a lot of texts to Jack in the summer of 2009. He never worked up the nerve to send any of them.

physical or otherwise by jedusaur (podfic - audio only) - explicit | audio length: 3:33 mins | this is short and packs quite a punch; please give it a listen!

"Listen to me, Jack. I am not going first in the draft because of your shitty impulse control."

city without seasons by thepalebluedot - teen | short | angst

It’s hard to measure time in a city you don’t believe in.

Kent after the draft.

Countdown by SummerFrost - mature | short | drabble | angst

Kent Parson spends three years of birthdays asking for Jack Zimmermann. Jack gives what he can; sometimes it's enough.

what might have been lost - mature | short | angst | ransom and holster reads fic au | 5+ 1

five times jack and kent loved each other (and one time they couldn't)

So if you don't mind, I'll walk that line by alyssakate - teen | short | au |

Kent and Jack play each other at World Juniors in 2008 and then again in 2009.

A story about winning, losing and coming to terms with what really matters.

no sign of land by perichareia - gen | short | unrequited love | angst | 2nd Person POV

i love him.

you’re seventeen years old and the words echo in your head like the aftershock of a heavy check into the glass. for a long moment, your world stops.

dodging bullets with your broken heart by perfectpro - gen | short | angst | mostly jack-centric, but i feel like it's in-character with how jack compartmentalizes his life, which explains a lot about the tension with Kent refusing to be boxed and be forgotten

Kent belongs back in Juniors. Kent belongs at Rimouski, and on the bus traveling to roadies, and on the ice with Oceanic. Kent does not belong on the front porch of the Haus.

Five scenes between Ashley Parson and her brilliant, miserable, wonderful big brother. Or: Kent Parson, growing up.

Role Models by MisconductandMimosas - gen | medium | au | read the rest of the series here

Jack and Kent both missed the draft, albeit for completely different reasons

-or-

“For your ThrowBack Thursday of the week, we sat down with two of the NHL’s finest, Trotsy of the Aces and McLeed of the Rangers to talk their record-breaking Memorial Cup win as well as former juniors star and Zimmermann liney- Kent-“ Holster looked at the magazine article and blinked- “Parson,” he said at a lower volume. “Kent Parson? I forgot about that guy. How did they even find him?”

history begins to be blue and brown eyes by decinq - teen | short | angsty ending, with j/b

There are articles upon articles about their on-ice chemistry, the way they move around each other like the well-oiled grooves of an impeccable machine.

welcome to the second reel by idrilka - teen | short | angst

They win at home. It goes all the way to game six, and then they win in their own home arena after it goes to double overtime, and Kent gets to lift thirty-four pounds of silver into the air.

(In the aftermath of the Aces' first Stanley Cup Championship title, Kent goes to Samwell on his Cup day.)

This is What Happy Looks Like by VerityR ★ - teen | short | angst | i just like the author’s writing of it

It’s been years. Six of them. Kent Parson is not still in love with Jack Zimmermann. But it’s not like he’s in love with anybody else. So when, in his dreams, he stumbles upon something approaching happiness, maybe the figure is vaguely Jack-shaped. Jack-adjacent. But that’s not the same thing as love.

canon/canon divergent

past the last exit by misandrywitch ★ - teen | medium | the prose on this one blows me away

Jack wonders when Kent started asking so many questions that he doesn't have the answers to. It felt so much easier when neither of them asked any at all.

Shut the God Damn Door by jedusaur - mature | short | au | angst maybe? short but poignant

What if Jack went first overall, as planned, and took his addiction with him to Vegas?

"Leave, Parse," Jack says. Again.

Or: Kent finds himself stuck in a time loop.

i thought of you and where you'd gone by runphoebe - mature | short | angst with a hopeful ending | has k/omc | love the fics like this that don't view jack with rose colored glasses

When Kent’s name gets called first, he smiles, and when he slips the jersey over his head, he smiles, and when he realizes he’s going to be in Vegas, Las fucking Vegas, he smiles so hard his cheeks ache. Just because Jack’s a huge fucking fuck up who can’t handle being number one doesn’t mean Kent’s going to cry about it.

In which Kent doesn't even bother trying to get over Jack because he knows it's a huge waste of his time.

you're writing your tragedy by forochel - teen | short | angst | podfic available Year 2, Comic 9, Parse - Part III, from Kent's perspective. | epikegster

I basically took 'Kent "Baby One More Time" Parson' and ran with it.

you're familiar like my mirror years ago by nighimpossible - explicit | short | accidental voyeurism | epikegster

Kent and Jack get reacquainted at the Epikegster.

Alternatively: Bitty hears something he shouldn't have.

New Start by SalazarTipton - teen | short | morning after | fluff | post-epikegster

The morning after falling into bed together during Epikegster, Jack wakes up in Kent’s arms.

To Hell With Why by angelsaves - explicit | short | j/p/omc threesome | smut | my alternative excerpt/summary: id have a 3some w/u, Parse texts him after a while. Thanks, Jack replies

Jack has been over Parse for ages. (At least, that's what he tells himself.) In which there is bad-idea sex, accidental voyeurism, an invitation (or two) to a threesome, an actual threesome, and 0% "being over each other" by volume.

the epikegster remix series by defcontwo

you can take this heart - teen | short | epikegster | reconciliation

"So, what the hell was that, then?"

Or: a way that Epikegster could have gone differently.

and don't let go - teen | short | post-epikegster | fluff

"Did you miss me at all?"

Or: what happens when a pair of dumbasses use their words a little better.

down the backs of tabletops by defcontwo - teen | short | has mentions of k/omc and past j/b

Breakups are a kind of private war, Jack guesses.

varied my velocities by punkpadfoot ★ - teen | short | tentative friendship | tears were shed in the reading of this fic

This should feel like a victory. This shouldn't feel like tiptoeing around broken glass.

This Time (I'm Telling You, I'm Telling You) by sparklyslug - mature | short | angst | established relationship

He and Zimms, they’re pretty good at breakups, historically. They’re pretty good at what comes after the breakup, anyway.

fated to pretend by nighimpossible - teen | short | humor | only j/p if you squint but it's goddamn hilarious with a side of ransom and holster

5 Jack/Kent fics that Ransom and Holster dramatically reenact for the Haus + the truth.

Not Quite Too Late by loveandallthat - explicit | short | au | reconciliation | ahhhh this is nice

Jack accidentally confesses on live television that he had a young love that ended badly. It’s possible that this isn’t quite as bad as he thinks it is.

Seven-Year Itch by Idday ★ - teen | medium | fake/pretend relationship | married au | angst with a happy ending

“I’m sorry,” Georgia says slowly, like she thinks she misheard him. “You said you’re… married?”

Amanda raises her eyebrows and taps something onto her keyboard. “That’s good to know, Mr. Zimmermann, but I’m sure you know that many of our players are married.”

“Right, but this is… different.” Jack says.

“Jack,” Georgia says, “Why did you never mention this before? Do I know your wife?”

“I’m sure you do,” Jack says carefully, “Only… it’s not a wife. It’s Kent Parson.” ... (So what if they’re not pretending to be married. They’re still pretending to be happily married.)

the nearer your destination by achilleees - teen | short | angst | open-ended

“Parse fought Averin because he was talking shit about you,” Max said bluntly. “And you being here is not going to put him in a better emotional state.”

neutral zone stickhandling by achilleees - explicit | short | injury recovery | humor (hallelujiah)

The splint around Kent’s leg is a feat of engineering, a hulking behemoth of black plastic and Velcro, but the crutches are sleek and slim. an alternate take on the March of Jack’s senior year.

Push/Pull by thistidalwave, Verbyna - teen | short | soul bond au | break up | I’m gonna miss him for the rest of my life" stayed with me | why do all the soulbond fics in this pairing all end tragically? Who holds the stars up in the sky? Is true love just once in a lifetime?

He looks at Kent and feels nothing, if nothing feels like a shattered rib cage, all the protection around his heart gone. Kent is right in front of him, his hair falling into his face and his hands clenched in the sheets, but if Jack closes his eyes, Kent could be anywhere.

(or, Jack and Kent can’t keep their bond if they both want to play in the NHL.)

bang the doldrums by Verbyna - explicit | short | has j/b | au but almost canon in my head how jack aggressively minimizes kent's importance in his pre-samwell years lol

Kent Parson is not Jack's friend. He’s a fucking fever.

Maybe Jack's not the only one who's scared.

Kent and Jack come out together. Not together together, though, no matter how much Kent wishes that were true.

Alternately titled: "the jackparse get back together fic."

Kent Parson has well over ninety-nine problems. He has a chronic potty mouth, a sneaking suspicion he may be an actual idiot, a narcissistically-named cat with gas issues, too many sisters... the list goes on.

Kent Parson has more than ninety-nine problems and Jack Zimmermann — freshly, resentfully and recently traded to the Las Vegas Aces — is definitely one of them.

you know i held on too much by unveils - explicit | short | fluff | smut | yay all the way for happy smut

It takes a minute for the pieces to work together in Jack’s brain, but when he catches Kent’s Britney phone case out of the corner of his eye, heat blooms in his chest to match the spread of red across his cheeks, embarrassment and something else entirely. He doesn’t duck his head, but it’s a near thing, under Kent’s crooked grin. “Really? You think now is a good time to be taking pictures?”

Two swipes and a press of Kent’s thumb has his camera app sliding open to the picture he took. Jack cranes his neck to see, but Kent presses the phone into his hand, slides his hands around Jack’s neck. “Dude, yeah. You make me look good, Zimms.” -- or: the one where jack and kent have fun with camera phones!

my honey i know by achilleees - teen | short | possessiveness | jealousy | reconciliation

After that, it happened more often than he would ever have wanted to admit. It was almost too easy; girls were always after Kent, but Kent spent too much of his time looking at Jack to notice.

For example, Kent texted him from chemistry one day. Hey lara and aly wanted 2 know if we wanted 2 go thrifting w them after school 2day. No, was all Jack texted back.

Kk, Kent replied, and they didn’t go thrifting with Lara and Aly after school that day.

we could be made for this by stereosymbiosis - explicit | short | pwp

Kent lifts his head and peers up at Jack. “Hey, Zimms, what kind of soap do you use?”

“I’m not sure this is entirely relevant, Parse,” Jack breathes out. Kent looks at the expanse of skin stretched before him, Jack’s muscles taut and twitching, the fucking perfect rise of Jack’s ass, Jack’s legs spread just so and his knees pressed into the mattress for leverage, and yeah. That can probably wait.

Jersey Memories by SalazarTipton - teen | short | reminiscing | hopeful ending

When Jack goes home to Montreal for break and just wants to get his assignments finished, but his parents keep giving him chores. When his mom sends him to look through his old jerseys, he gets lost in some old memories.

take me back to when we started by madameofmusic - teen | short | reminiscing | reconciliation

Kent gets a package in the mail from Jack six months after Jack signs with the Falconers.

They’re never going to be the same carefree best friends that they once were, and Kent’s getting around to accepting that. Things are good, now, but they’re not the same, and that’s okay. He’s getting used to it.

They’re better than they’ve been in years, and that’s really all that he can hope for, but sometimes Kent remembers all the texts he sent at 2 am and all the responses he never got.

Better the Second Time by loveandallthat - teen | short | au | reconciliation

He gets Jack’s text, “you don’t have to,” thirty seconds before he gets a direct email from Jack’s agent.

Of course he has to.

Or, Jack has a public event before he goes into the NHL, and Jack’s agent insists that it won’t be good publicity unless Kent is also there.

the heaviest of burdens by thekissofbees - mature | short | angsty pining

Kent sleeps with his phone resting on his pillow, the volume cranked up as high as it will go and the vibrate on. He’s stretched the cord of the charger out so that it will reach his bed, and the coating of the wire is beginning to fray and peel off at the top.

(Or: Kent waits for Jack to call.)

Like Slow Motion by apatientwolf - teen | short | reminiscing | angsty pining

//There in the bathroom I try not to fall apart and the sinking feeling starts as I say hopelessly "he said he'd be here"// OR Taylor Swift's discography is the soundtrack of Kent Parson's life.

The one where it's July 4th 2015 in upstate New York.

Getting Some Rest by SalazarTipton - gen | short | established relationship | fluff

There’s a box under Jack’s desk. When he works on a paper, he’ll kick his feet up on it. Everybody that comes in doesn’t notice it. If they did, it just looks like some miscellaneous box of whatever. Nothing special. They wouldn’t think anything of it. No one knows that battered, footprint covered cardboard box is Jack’s lifeline. On his hardest days and in the surreal, dark hours when his insomnia hits, he opens it up and is able to breathe.

Kent likes the difference between their bodies. He likes being shorter than Jack because he can curl comfortably under the weight of Jack’s arm across his shoulders when they stand next to each other, and he likes that Jack’s body on top of his is enough to hold him down and keep him there if Jack doesn’t want him to move. He likes that Jack has big, strong hands and big, thick fingers.

The Aces get knocked out of the playoffs and Kent Parson is having feelings about it. Jack Zimmermann is having feelings about him.

keep your lights on by ladyalysv - explicit | short | rebound sex | au | unapologetically elf-centric jack

At least with Parse, it's hard to fuck things up more. (2016)

when you were there by defcontwo - mature | short | angsty angst

Jack plays the Aces for the first time, and two things happen at once: Jack, nervous and fumbling all the way through the warm up, right down to puck drop when he catches sight of that familiar blonde hair and something in him just settles, winds up playing the most beautiful hockey of his season to date.

And Kent ignores him completely.

Redux series by Idday ★ - established relationship | domesticity | fluff | au | the thing with future-ish jackparse fluff aus is that their issues (e.g. kent's insecurities, or jack's daddy issues) remain to be dealt with and don't vanish by the virtue of love ipso facto, and that's why they're so goddamn satisfying

Like We Were - teen | short | first times (again) | getting back together | friends to lovers

Jack thinks there should be a word for this, for when you fall in love with the same person a second time.

no one has me (like you do) - teen | short | summers and holidays

“Kenny,” Jack says again. “You went golfing for me. That’s how I know it’s real.”

my heart, it came to life - mature | short | family planning??

“Kenny,” Jack says, and falls into the deck chair where Kent is laying out, absorbed in whatever’s on his phone screen. It could be an email from his agent, or it could be a cat video. It’s hard to tell.

The chair is much too small for two fully grown hockey players, but they make it work. Kent drops his phone, but he’s wearing sunglasses, his face hard to read. Jack pulls them down gently until Kent’s squinting up at him, eyes adjusting to the bright afternoon.

“Do you want kids?” Jack asks him.

something about the way you love me (finally feels like home) - teen | short | pseudo-proposal

He loves Jack likes this and loves that he can make him like this—warm and open and laughing with their friends. It makes him stupidly proud, like he has his own personal Jack Zimmermann. He has to share his boyfriend with the rest of the world, sure, but they only get the hockey robot version. Kent gets this Jack, the real Jack, all to himself.

future

“For one player on the Aces, this game represents the return of youth in another, special way. In just three weeks, Kent Parson, captain of the Las Vegas Aces, will not only be returning to the east coast winter of his childhood, but he will have the rare opportunity of being out on the same pond as his former friend and rival, Jack Zimmermann. The opportunity to play a game outdoors may remind them of their childhood, but from sharing a special bond as young teammates to struggling against each other for victory, this game also shows how much has changed with time.“

Kent texted Jack: “fucking epix”.

Dad Hugs by MisconductandMimosas - gen | short | more kent & bad bob tbh but i’ll take more of this rn | fluff

In the summer of 2019, Kent attends Bob Zimmermann’s private Hockey Hall of Fame Induction party

Because Jack is an addict, and some addicts relapse.

Endgame Jack/Kent. I cannot stress this enough.

In Due Time by loveandallthat - teen | short | reconciliation

Jack’s been in the NHL for several years now. The Falconers rose to glory and fell again, just like the Aces. Jack gets on a plane to Vegas.

Behind Closed Doors by loveandallthat - explicit | short | reconciliation | friends to lovers | getting together

It’s just a tabloid. Nobody’s going to believe it anyway; it’s fine. Don’t worry about it. Jack can tell himself any one of these things a thousand times and he’s never going to believe them.

Confirmed: Kent Parson Las Vegas Aces’ First Choice All Along It doesn’t even help that the last line is, “When asked for comment, Kent Parson said, ‘Who even cares anymore?’”

17 Again by daeguarchives - teen | short | friends to lovers | angst

“I can’t believe I actually thought I was in love with you, once.”

17 was a bad time for both of them, they both know that. Except now Kent's kidding himself into thinking he can move on and Jack's kidding himself into thinking he has moved on and for some reason, 17 seems a much better time than now.

new jersey is for lovers series by defcontwo, sparkyplugs ★ | it's soft and sweet and sometimes, that's enough

Ready to Walk a Path That's New - teen | short | curtainfic | fluff

They’ll always have things to apologize to each other for. But these days, they’re trying to focus on what they have to thank each other for.

These days, that’s a much longer list.

There's a place for you and me - mature | short | proposal | fluff

“I don’t know, I just, uh. It wasn’t there. He’s not the kind of guy I could see myself ending up with, I guess.”

Jack laughs, warm and close, the standard pre-chirp Zimmermann coming in at the edges. “And what kind of guy would that be?”

Kent swallows hard, and thinks, You. Fuck me, it’s always going to be you. Or: the slow and steady steps to a happily ever after.

“And my running observation is that Parse can’t take a compliment from you without blowing it off. Could be a coincidence, but no evidence to the contrary since I started paying attention,” Ransom said.

“What?” Jack said, right as Kent walked back in the room.

the river twice by Verbyna - teen | short | addiction relapse | angst | hopeful ending at least

Going to Vegas seemed like the only option.

player judged most valuable by achilleees - teen | short

prompt: future fic, jack’s been in the nhl a few years, ignoring parse when they play the aces. he can’t ignore him the night of the nhl awards, not when he looks this good, not when he fucking thanks jack in his hart acceptance speech.

i really really really really really really like you by achilleees ★ - teen | short | insecurity | established relationship | jack reassuring kent is my forever jam

“Hey,” Jack said. “My parents love you, alright? They have never not loved you. This is going to be fine.”

“Condescension negates cookie privileges,” Kent said, and shut the door in his face.

some nebulous universe called domesticity series by alwaysbuddy ★ - established relationship | fluff | humor

keep your hands on me - explicit | short | sex dream | feminization | dirty talk af

“Not a girl then?”

“It was, yeah,” Jack admits, throat feeling a little tight, “you were the girl.

”in search of our lost time - explicit | short | hurt/comfort | bathtub sex

Jack rests a hand lightly on the porcelain, skimming forward to catch one of Kent’s wrists, where it’s dangling off the edge of the tub. Kent immediately turns his hand over, and wraps two fingers around Jack’s own wrist loosely, tugging in a way that says, why aren’t you in here with me yet, huh?

Maybe I'm Not Too Young to be a Cowboy by bsmog - teen | medium | retirement | injury

Kent is 34 years old. He's won everything there is to win in the world of hockey (just not this year, let's not talk about it, okay?), but ever since an injury took Jack out of hockey altogether, there's something missing on the ice. What the hell is the offseason for if not to find out what that is?

If only anything was ever that easy where Jack Zimmermann was concerned.

Wait So Long by perfectpro - gen | short | fluff | wedding and marriage | domesticity

Let it never be said that Kent Parson doesn’t work for what he wants. Trembling, Kent gets off his knee, but he doesn’t close the ring box. “I don’t want to win another Cup alone. I don’t want to win another Cup without you,” he explains, and it’s a confession if it’s anything. He doesn’t know how to make it not true.

Gordie Meow by madameofmusic - teen | short | fluff | established relationship | humor

Kent’s cats are allergic to Jack. This isn’t even the most ridiculous thing Jack’s had to deal with.

Kent “No Chill” Parson by MisconductandMimosas - gen | short | humor | all-star weekend au | established relationship, if you read this first

“Be on my team for the All-Star game,” Kent said suddenly.

Jack chuckled, “They haven’t even announced next year’s format yet. It could be by division this year. Even if it’s not, they could make us opposing captains.”

#omgcheckplease #kent parson #parsepositive #jackparse #pimms #jack zimmermann #fic rec #omgcp

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