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rufusrant · 2 years

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Florence + the Machine - How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful: Album Review

Because I went the whole of Florence's birth month without dropping my irrelevant and unwarranted opinions on her ovure, I'm doing it now. Yay!

As usual, I'm reviewing the deluxe version of the album, along with all separate tracks that were released on other versions, so expect to see the Target-exclusive tracks. Demos however are omitted.

I originally also wanted to make the connections to Dante's Purgatory and the companion film for this album, The Odyssey, but realised halfway that I'd actually mistaken Purgatory for Inferno and had to scrap that because I WILL review music but not a poem I have never read. So instead, I shall only be reviewing this album for its music.

How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful: try saying that 5 times fast

#1: Ship To Wreck

This song has one of the most Florence-esque yet absolutely modern hot-mess origin stories ever: the gist is that Florence held a party, got drunk at the bar where they'd moved the party, covered Daft Punk’s Get Lucky in supreme party girl fashion, went home and then broke everything while water covered her floors. It’s more detailed in her interview with Ellen here.

The second this song started, I got the feeling of being plunged underwater. This is Hurricane Drunk’s older sister after a ferocious bender. It’s so infectious, swirling with self-destruction and stormy guitars and absolute RAGE. The glockenspiel is like air bubbles from where we gasp as we sink. As an opening song, it’s perfect in tone, placement, and as an introduction to the album: we can’t leave the water yet. We can’t stop a shipwreck while it’s happening. 9/10.

#2: What Kind Of Man

I LOVE when Florence goes extra rock. Here is a complete flash-bang where we’re pulled out from the water and immediately tossed into the inferno. The brass orchestration and Florence’s howling, angry vocals take the cake, and those lyrics are the cherries: about a man whose kiss sparks two decades of devotion but just can’t seem to make up his mind (OH.) about his and Florence’s relationship. There is no tender longing present; this is about all the old hurt that comes hurtling to the surface from the partners we’ve stayed just a tad too long with and are, somehow, still staying with. And I fuckin hear you, Florence. 10/10.

#3: How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful

Does Florence refer to the sky or her old love, the ocean? I like to think it’s both: this song depicts that rowdy, journeying feeling of going through a sudden/unexpected transitory period so well. The strings that blaze as she sings the song’s title just rip one through my heart, and the brass instruments return from the previous track, but are utilised for a more subtle, gentler sound. It’s nothing short of grand — but for me, the softer tone of this rather breaks the rock momentum Florence has been building for the last two tracks. 6/10.

#4: Queen Of Peace

Crashing back into fantasy and metaphor after some hard reality bites, we’re pulled back a little into the grandeur of Ceremonials with the grand production and full orchestra to make a modern medieval ballad, but it’s unmistakably a new era of Florence with the way she carries her voice like how a lonely queen looks over a dead field after the battle has ceased. This song is about a triumph, but a deeply bittersweet one at that. And I truly love it for that, because its the truth: what is a triumph without a hard-fought struggle beforehand? 9.5/10.

#5: Various Storms & Saints

I genuinely like the lyrics, but this melody… I always forget about this song as whole. Oops. That much I can say. It stays relatively downtempo and subdued the whole time. Florence’s vocals are the best part and she utilises the powers of her voice only when absolutely necessary, but this song just lacks the “big, almighty sound” that makes up all of the hits, so I’m sorry to say that this is more of a miss for me. 4.5/10.

#6: Delilah

I fucking can’t. This song destroyed me. That is to say: I love this.

Drawing from the bibical tale of Samson and Delilah, Florence crafts an agonising, intense, total curb-stomper about feeling betrayed and yet being on the verge of breaking free. And it slaps so hard. The percussion combined with Florence’s high-strung, burning vocals make the song such a catchy, swinging, forceful cry. The video for this on The Odyssey is also my favourite of them all, with that heart-rending opening monologue, references to Pre-Raphelite art, and how the visual language of the story is employed. 10/10.

#7: Long & Lost

The most sombre song on this album. It’s also definitely a breather after the freedom scream that Delilah demands. Though it’s fittingly about retreating into some self-doubt, I quite like how this actually feels like a meditation of sorts; a glimpse into Florence’s head and heart as she ponders if going back to where she was is worth it, and laments that maybe it really is already too late. I think it’s rather beautiful, with an even more softened melody to accompany Florence’s dreamily mournful vocals. 7/10.

#8: Caught

Calling this a “livelier” song feels like a bit of a misnomer. Florence’s voice feels lighter and more active in this, but it’s ultimately still a song on the understated side about feeling torn between two extremes: being able to finally move on and holding onto something that hurts. I love how Florence name-drops Persephone, notable for being torn between two very different landscapes, to illustrate her point. The production on this track is one of my favourites — the minimalism applied to this is a sonic treat, and the focus given to Florence’s delivery is top-notch. 8/10.

#9: Third Eye

My personal favourite. This is genuinely one of the most cathartic and life-affirming songs I’ve ever heard. It’s got all sorts of upbeat vibes, spirituality, and an amazing outro that’s practically a mantra. But what I think really makes this song so powerful is how it's styled like a religious hymn— but instead of looking towards God, Florence actually implores us to draw strength and change from within ourselves, to forgive ourselves and love ourselves. God is great, no doubt, but maybe God has been within ourselves all along. 10/10.

#10: St Jude

Not gonna lie, this is where the album starkly loses momentum for me. Again. Why is such a solemn track right after the glorious Third Eye???

Of all things, Florence seems to turn back and contemplate her failed relationship once again — but that’s about it for its cons. I think the lyrics for these are great and Florence’s voice does some truly beautiful things, but its odd placement just makes it tank from its full potential. 5/10.

#11: Mother

This took me completely by surprise. I felt annihilated by the end of this. Not only does the album regain its streak with this one track, this song is also truly lyrically stellar and Florence’s voice kicks back into full rock gear straight on. The shifting tides of the instrumentals just score her so perfectly, it feels like we’re being pulled back into the Ceremonial waters for just an utterly rug-pulled-from-under-feet moment. It’s the epitome of that HUGE sound I’ve craved so much— and fittingly, it’s rather a despairing song once you actually read the lyrics. But hey, getting out of such deep water isn’t as smooth a task as it may sound. 10/10.

#12: Hiding

That pre-chorus is so catchy. In fact, this whole song is a proper dance number. So is Delilah but this is more lighthearted, arguably just as powerful AND it manages to retain all the refrains of a poem. It’s a song about being in denial and yet also acknowledging you’re in denial. It's so lively and is probably the song most likely to be played at a club (hell yeah the return of the tambourine), until you hear Florence’s outro at the end. Fuck. 8.5/10.

#13: Make Up Your Mind

What a heart-thrummer. The soft harp makes an unexpected but very welcome return on this absolute neck-breaker of a song, with Florence painting herself as an executioner ready to cut off her relationship— or is she?

I love how this song incorporates the vulnerability of love and yet the utter ruthlessness that ultimately gets born when love morphs into resentment. When Florence demands that her lover lets her live or lets her love them it almost seems that even that’s lose-lose, with all the trimmings of a medieval scene with that unique, desperate and divine Florence-esqueness. Of course I fucking dig it. 9/10.

#14: Which Witch

Florence embraces the idea of martyrdom— specifically, being martyred by love. It’s such a tight, soaring, jumpy song about getting trialled for witchcraft/love, being miles away but having your love on your mind, getting tired of crawling all the way, and hurting from this so much that burning at the stake is seen as a reprieve. That’s a LOT. But Florence fuckin KILLS it.

I love this song and think it’s genuinely an amazing song on its own, but am really conflicted about its placement as the album closer — because here Florence ultimately decides to continue her relationship, the very thing that’s been dragging her back into the water throughout the album. I think my thoughts on this change from day to day. When I’m feeling particularly mournful I think it's a perfect closer: it's better to hold onto any form of love than to never love at all. But when I’m not… it’s a gut punch, like it or not. Moving on is an emotional task that we all eventually have to undertake but may not succeed at. However, the duality of this very idea, I think, is what really draws me to this song. It’s okay to not fully move on. But it’s equally just as okay to hold out hope that one day, just maybe, you might. 10/10.

EXCLUSIVE EDITION TRACKS

#15: As Far As I Could Get

This is the PERFECT combination of Florence’s two song styles: epically full of grand, godly metaphors and modern everyday settings out of a contemporary novel. Florence talks about escaping the bustle of Los Angeles and manages to mix reverent nature and a gospel voice with the spectacle of passing by a Disney castle and the Pirates of the Caribbean ride so fuckingly well. I’m incensed that this isn’t on the standard album— perhaps because I find myself relating so much to this right now, but also because it’s a legit banger about actually being determined to escape and move on, being right in the middle of this arduous process, and still feeling that you haven’t gotten far enough yet. 10/10.

#16: Pure Feeling

…I feel so guilty about this. Florence conveys this great, wholesome message of how she loves the world and of how she learnt to during her year off with some lyrics that really lay bare this humbling, warm feeling. But I must admit that the effect’s rather lost on me when paired with the way the melody sounds. Florence also sounds like she’s on the verge of gasping — and not in the good way. 4/10.

#17: Conductor

The lyrics for this are so beautifully poetic. Florence calls back to the standard album’s laments about a lover’s crippling indecision and how she herself turns to songwriting to channel her emotions — much like how conductors conduct both music and electricity. We love a double meaning!

I love the strength of her voice here and the simpler no-frills arrangements of piano and strings that accompany her. I really wish that this could’ve made it onto the standard album too, but in a way I can also see why it didn’t. (Though I don’t really stand for that, it's thematically perfect and has a great Florence vocal, C’MON TARGET WTF) 7.5/10.

#18: Only Love Can Break Your Heart

A Neil Young cover. I’m a fan of the original song as well, and really feel that she did this one so much justice. It exudes a grace and a longing that just extrudes so much more prominently than the original. Florence’s vocals are so clear and carry the tune so delightfully that it loses none of its original melancholy and instead garners so much pure, pure beauty. 7/10.

Overview: What an album. It feels like a lightning strike, and that's already in the simplest of terms. I feel this album as a whole is about learning to let go and change for the better, even if we can’t fully bring ourselves to yet. But my favourite description of this album comes from Florence herself:

“Ceremonials was so fixated on death and water, and the idea of escape or transcendence through death, but the new album became about trying to learn how to live, and how to love in the world rather than trying to escape from it. Which is frightening because I'm not hiding behind anything but it felt like something I had to do."

Which brings us to F+TM's new logo for this era:

A search on Reddit proved that these two triangles are the alchemical symbols for air and water respectively — so this album is literally about the air above water. About rising above the surface. About being free of all that drags you down.

Ceremonials may be the masterful album that says your grief and pain are valid and it’s okay to feel the way you feel, but How Big How Blue How Beautiful is the imperative follow-up that says: I want to heal. I will heal. 9.5/10.

Stream How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful on Spotify!

#florence + the machine #hbhbhb #how big how blue how beautiful #florence welch #album review

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jjkpls · 3 years

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the wishlist (m) - 3

“You used it.”

> genre : smut, fluff

> pairing : jeon jungkook x reader (f)

> words : 4.2k

> content/warnings : back at it again w/ the bff2l; one sided love, lot of pining; sextoys talk and use; explicit language; masturbation (f); ambiguous infidelity; awkward oc; koo being cute but insufferable

previous - next

For about a week and a half, you simply ignore the outrageous box sitting in the centre of your living room.

If you omit to remember what’s inside, it’s just a nice-looking decoration, embellishing your messy coffee table. It’s perfectly fine sitting between the unopened mails and the takeout brochures. You see Jungkook glance at it each time he comes over but he has the decency to not mention it. You might have read a little disappointment but he didn’t share it with you, not wanting to bother you, as you rightfully assumed, and in any case, you’re just doing exactly what you said you would: not use it.

Then comes a glorious day of resting from work for you, and miraculously it matches your two closest girl friends' schedules and they owe to come over, celebrate a belated Christmas with you. And as you’re quickly tidying up the place, the question of the box being way too present here is raised again. They will ask about it. One will surely open it before you even get to answer.

The box has to go.

And in your room, hidden in your bedside table where you know no one will peak, it goes.

When you wake up from the fantastic, long-awaited Christmas celebration, it’s with a terrible headache. Mary, the amateur singer, received a ridiculous karaoke mic and if karaoke is involved, so is alcohol. You didn’t know that but apparently, you can get a severe almost deadly hangover from rosé. Well. Starting this new year already learning new things, how great.

One thing that’s unchanged for this new year, as it seems, is Jungkook's talent for psychic arts. He somehow knows you need a copious breakfast made with love and by him, and the curious hangover shot only his roommate has the secret recipe of, to cope with being alive this morning.

“Hello, Sunshine.” Your face feels so bloated and tensed at the same time like it’s made of playdoh and some devilish kid came and punched at it then squished it hard with its chubby mean fingers.

Very unpleasant.

You know you have very little to do with a ray of sunshine at the moment. You're more alike a gremlin or something. Therefore, as a gremlin would, you groan an answer. You catch through the minuscule slits you now own for eyelids a grin from him. It’s not even vexing or upsetting. His lovely, lovely smile is always a blessing. It’s the only thing that makes you not want to head back to bed and just sleep until death ensues. The pretty, pretty thing. With the big bunny front teeth. He is the sunshine.

“Had fun last night?” He asks, still grinning, once he’s served you and himself two good plates of pancakes. He’s sitting in front of you, in front of this delicious looking good, yet he’s ogling you with a strange insistence. When he starts eating because you take too long to formulate a response, he munches slowly, still staring, instead of stuffing his face and swallow down the whole thing like a starving man, like he usually does.

“Yeah. They spoiled me.” You say, quietly. You’re confused. You feel uneasy like there’s something you’re not getting. You hate this feeling. Usually, this friendship is filled with inside jokes you can make up exclusively via telepathy. But here you’re missing something, it feels. Or you might just be confused by the headache and possibly somehow still a bit drunk.

“Oh did they?” The beam is even wider. You frown, nod, decide that it’s too early and your brain too foggy to try and investigate a confusion that might just be the product of your imagination.

It doesn’t click then. It doesn’t click the next three times he asks you again, with slightly different formulations if, really, you had fun last night.

He departs an hour later because he has an appointment with a client, as always leaving some of himself for your guilty pleasure and the marking on your eyelids of that curious grin. That curious mischievous grin. With the crooked shape, the white teeth looking menacing like a wolve’s and the eyebrows arched in suggestion.

How come such an attractive look can be so anxiety-inducing? You’re too fidgety, too confused and concerned to focus on anything. Remnants of the conversation rolling back again and again, trying to make sense of things that probably do not necessitate further explaining.

The whole ordeal made you so nervous, you end up after an hour of trying to go about your day and failing poorly, sitting on your sofa, lotus style, eyes closed and hands turned up to the universe (hoping It might offer you some clearance It would just drop off in your palms). The thing is meditating is hard. Making so your brain would shut the fuck up is hard as hell. And you suck at it.

Spoiler alert, you don’t reach the state of inner peace and quiet you wished to find. Instead, you make enough silence for your noggins to be more performing and suddenly it hits. Your eyes grow ten times in size, you almost fall from your sit for the shock is violent.

The moron.

You or him, probably both.

You

I did NOT use it.

You

I put it away because the girls were coming over but I DID NOT USE IT

He simply replies with a winking emoji and you hate him for it.

You

Jeon Jungkook, ur a dick I said I wouldnt use it EVER and I won’t, have a nice day moron.

And again, this time, you mean it. You’ve never said anything with this much conviction in these twenty-five years of living.

Why would you now? When you now have experienced what it felt to have him look at you thinking you’ve done it. It felt mortifying without even knowing why. In all the case scenarios you could have come up with, you’ve never imagined that one. You would use it, he would know about it somehow, he wouldn’t be disgusted (it wouldn’t make sense for him to be as he is the one who offered it to you but your brain and soft ego sometimes are annoying like that), he would be amused, maybe content, but he wouldn't make you feel mortified.

Having him considering you in a sexual position should be... cool, shouldn’t it? If you really like him that much. Maybe you were confused all along and actually, you don’t, you mistook your own feelings.

Just a quick check of a mental picture you have of him, the fond smile growing just from his pretty face with the pretty everything on it can’t be trusted because, for all you know, everyone smiles this way when they think about him. On the other hand, the swift blush invading your cheeks when you (by accident) linger on parts you really really like about him -like his thighs or the man titties he’s been growing lately- serve to remind you that yes, yes indeed you like him.

But he’s an asshole.

No matter how much you thought about it (and you thought about it a lot even though you’re ashamed to admit it), you've never consider it to realize, you never and you still don’t believe anything non-platonic would ever happen with him. You’re just made to be friends. The best of friends but still just friends.

Not even taking a step but simply dipping the tips of your toes in these unknown waters turns out to be terrifying and you're mad at him because he’s putting you in this situation where you feel awfully uneasy.

It should all remain a very personal, very intimate fantasy: your attraction for him.

He cracked the wall for a second, it felt wrong and terrible but it’s done and over with now.

It’s only you and your thoughts.

You don’t ever mention it, he doesn’t bring it back up. Soon the season of celebrations and wishes is behind you, the world starts rolling slowly, boringly so with its lots of little annoyances and distractions and you’re not even thinking about it anymore, neither is he.

You’re stressed out. Work is being a bitch as it does. And because it sucks most of your time and patience, the only quick way to unwind you know comes to play.

But the hassle is not worth it. Unfortunately this you always need to realize afterwards. After having searched the internet for good masturbatory content for half an hour, working yourself for two hours and then, there’s the safety wee and the freshening up before bed, to wake up the next morning feeling like shit because of course, you sacrificed hours of sleep for an unsatisfactory outcome.

It’s not worth it.

It hasn’t been for months. Even if you’re still more able to take care of yourself and pleasure yourself better than most if not all men you’ve ever been with, something is missing: a man (or maybe just a dick).

You feel bored and empty (in both senses). Stuck because the more you need to unwind, the more you try, the less you feel better.

It’s the snake biting its own tail.

Until a certain pretty blue box, sleeping inside your bedside table, recalls itself to you. It feels like a century had passed since the box arrived in your life, it doesn’t seem as scary as it used to, as stressful. The fact that Jungkook hasn’t mentioned it, might even has himself forgotten about it, help immensely.

And it is the very moment, you forget to remember about this promise you made to him and yourself, the promise that you would not use it.

Right about now, not only stressed and annoyed by everything but also horny for no particular reason, this dildo with the box that matches your planner sounds ideal.

And it is ideal.

Feels like exactly what you needed. The size is not ridiculously big, it’s fairly tiny actually but given you haven’t had sex in a while, it suffices to stretch you out just fine. It’s new and exciting. The texture feels really nice, smooth, slipping perfectly right between your walls. It’s rather long, slightly curved, filling you in deep and teasing the spot that you could never even dream of reaching with your short ass fingers. And in no time (and you actually regret that) you’re on cloud 9, it’s a thought of the Santa that brought this blessing of a gift in your life that sends you there. You feel satisfied, content, fulfilled from the tip of your hair to your toes, smiling like an idiot because damn, that was a good orgasm.

Right this moment, you feel fine about using the present. About quickly having thought about him too because it’s not that much of a big deal. He won’t know about it. He doesn’t really seem to care about your sex life anymore (which is, ironically, a blessing). Therefore why should there be a problem? Why would there be?

Apparently, you’ve underestimated the crankiness of your attitude for the few weeks that passed before the phenomenal orgasm.

Apparently, you had been the worst kind of truculent bitch there is, to a level you didn’t even know you could reach (also no one told you!), because when Jungkook meets up with you, maybe after the third or fourth times of having used your lovely new companion, he noticed something has changed. Instantly.

“What’s going on?” He asks with a bright smile and excited shiny eyes as if he expects you to have great news to share.

“Nothing special...” Tilting your head to the side, you drag the words out as you try to think about it for a second, wondering if there’s something that needs to be told.

“Really?” He sucks on his banana yoghurt with eyebrows frowned, staring at you as if he’s studying you. Once the thing is empty, he tosses it in a nearby bin, crosses his arms on his chest and glares. He looks like a detective about to interrogate you. He would look intimidating if it were not for his lips, sucked in to gather the last taste of his yoghurt. “You look awfully happy.”

“Do I?” It makes you smile, shrug your shoulders. It doesn’t hit just then. It should be fine. He can’t unravel something that you don’t even have knowledge of, can he? But Jungkook is a little weasel. He loves to know everything.

Especially when it’s about you.

“You better not be seeing anyone-“ You should wonder where this is coming from, all of a sudden. Instead, you take offence, how dares he?

“What do you mean ‘I better’? I do what-“

“Without telling me? You better not.” He has that shit-eating grin, his signature brat's smile, because he knows you can’t reach over the table to smack him in the head without risking to tip over your drinks or dip your sleeve in soja sauce.

“Anyway. Nothing's going on.” For a second, a staring contest takes place on this convenience store's terrace. You’re not sure why. He’s daring you for no reason. Until his mouth twitches, wanting to smile and it makes you laugh so he follows along. “Were you not supposed to tell me about your next appointment?”

“Client Amy, yes!” It shouldn’t make you laugh to hear him name her like that as it’s been his trademark to mention his clients as if they were Pokémon trainers but it does.

You’ve always thought that it’s his very personal way of living this childhood fantasy of existing within the Pokémon universe. His life is full of potential trainers. Most of the time it’s just Client Enter the Name here but sometimes it’s Baker Jin -who’s not actually a baker but a salesman at his neighbourhood’s bakery-, there’s Dancer Hoseok, who’s the main dance partner of his best friend and Roommate Park Jimin. Sometimes he calls you Friend Y/N, it’s frustratingly funny. You hate that you spill at least a nose snort at each and every single one of his stupid jokes. His grin always grows ten times bigger, his eyes twinkle in a lovely way but you know that you are encouraging him. Encouraging him to be fucking annoying, like a little brother who’s just pushing unfunny jokes too far, just keep repeating them because he knows he can get a reaction. “She wants me to tattoo the dragon from Spirited Away on her arm-“

You gasp and he smiles even wider.

“I know, right? And I was thinking- to give it flow, I would have it- like fly through cherry blossoms.” Attentively, you listen, squinting a bit when he gets technical to try and picture the project you have a hard time making up alone in your mind.

Imagination and creativity have always been his thing. He had you impregnated with it long ago because he is too passionate and too much of a sharer to allow you to keep away from all arts -because you can’t hold a pencil straight without panicking at the idea of having to draw something- which you would have gladly done if it weren't for him. He’s the gifted one. And his drawings, either on paper, screen or skin, have always been a subject of huge admiration for you. You’re a bit ashamed to admit it but you’ve never really touched to anything really artistic. You often don’t really get it. But his stuff does something to you -and not only because you adore him but actually impartially. There’s no finesse, no pertinency, no trait nor emotion you’ve acknowledged and connected to better than the ones he creates. “You know this scene where he’s struggling against the little paper thingies and he’s flying through them and they’re going everywhere, I was thinking that, replace them with cherry blossoms. And there would be little petals like everywhere around it. Sounds cool?”

“It sounds fantastic.” You say honestly. You’re impressed by every single one of his projects. Always surprised, somehow, by the pieces he ends up making. Sometimes scrolling through the Instagram page he uses as a book, where he publishes his most elaborated, most expensive pieces and while recognizing his touch, the delicacy in his traits, the peculiar curls of certain lines, the overall feel to them, there’s always this sort of paradoxical disbelief. How could this kid make these and at the same time, who else but him to have made these?

Cute nose scrunches up.

“I’ll send you my drawings when I’m done with them.”

“Cool.”

“Cool.” He is mimicking you. Same pose with the head nod and the leg cross. Same tone and same expression apart from the discreet light dancing in his eye. “So what’s up? You needed to talk to me about something yesterday, didn’t you?”

It takes a second for you to remember as the drastic change in your mood makes it seem the distressed text you sent him yesterday, right when you left work, was written a whole week ago. You don’t remember very well having felt so stressed and pissed off, pushed to your very limits by useless co-workers, that you felt the urgent need to rant about it all, vent your anger and frustration out to him. He was busy and didn’t answer right away. You got home, find the comfort of your sweater sitting on the warm heater and the glorious stand of your dildo and it all went away, bad mood, headache, grudges.

Of course, it awakes a wave of shame within you. If you have been able to use it without feeling guilt nor embarrassment on your own, it’s something else to think about it in front of Jungkook. You’ve made sure not to think about this dildo in front of him ever. But here, it’s him recalling it to you without even knowing.

Whatever, you can pretend that everything’s normal. With a barely natural cough, and the even more suspicious dismissive wave of the hand, you try to kill the conversation, “It was just my coworker getting on my nerves again, it’s whatever.”

Jungkook is watching you soundly. It’s nothing unusual for him. He’s the kind of persons that lean in when they listen to you, you never know how conscious they are of it but it’s like they really mean to make you feel important and heard. Therefore it shouldn’t worry you, he’s just doing his usual thing.

It still makes you grow increasingly more nervous.

It is factual that it is never “whatever”. The topic of your stupid dumb bitch of a coworker messing with you has always been a pressing subject you, every now and then, more often than you’d like, needed to ramble about to anyone willing to listen because she tended to make your life a pure living hell. The job sucks in itself but she made it a hundred times worse. And here you are, dismissing it. How suspicious.

“When you texted me yesterday, I thought it was for something bad.” He starts, frowning and staring deep inside the empty cookie package sitting on the table. “Then I saw you earlier and I thought it was for something really good, because of your face.”

“What’s up with my face?” You try to play it cool. Play it nonchalant and oblivious. If you can’t see the aura of contentment he can visibly observe around you, surely you’ve seen the glow up your skin has encountered since you’ve started using this sex toy. Unexpected benefit of using it that wasn’t even listed on the box, the stress it’s relieved and the pleasure it’s given have just cleared your skin out. Unbelievable but true. And apparently, he noticed.

“I don’t know. You look really... contented.”

“Contented?”

“Yeah...”

You shrug, looking down, at the crumbs on your side of the table, praying silently that the embarrassment you feel creeping up your face doesn’t show. “I’ve been used to you looking tired and all but you look-“ Like every single once of misery has been fucked out of your system. “Lately, you look... good.” The chosen adjective makes you tilt your head. For so many reasons, you didn’t expect to hear this one and for similar reasons, you don’t understand what he means. Without having you saying aloud anything, he gets your dubious grimace and chuckles, “Rejuvenated, actually.” Even worse.

To simplify in a few words, you used to look like an old decrepit hag and now that you’ve been thoroughly fucked -by yourself technically but still- you look rejuvenated. A word literally no one ever uses in real life.

You detest that he’s probably right. And now, embarrassment is not creeping but actually moving in, with all its stuff and luggage. Hopefully though, again, it doesn’t show on your stupid youthful face. “Are my compliments making you blush?”

Great.

“You can’t make me blush, moron. And if you think those were compliments then-“ You give him big wide eyes of “well fuck” and of course he laughs at that.

“Indeed, I can’t make you blush.” He has his serious, investigating type of expression again. You almost expect him to fetch a little notebook out of his pocket and start scribbling observations while asking you more questions.

“What’s making you blush then?”

“I’m not blushing, it’s just hot.” His eyebrows jump in a rude disagreeing curve. You don’t get why. It can happen, to be hot outside, at the near end of Korea’s winter, while simultaneously having red and painful looking fingers on the verge of congelation desperately seeking warmth in your pockets.

And maybe because it’s not the first time, he’s getting better at catching the signs, at drawing the lines in between the clues. Your caricatural post-orgasm happy face, your systematic defensiveness whenever the conversation is leading somehow to your sexuality, the blatant tell of shame on your cheeks when there’s nothing else ever that embarrass you in front of him. There’s only the common cause missing and quickly, ignoring completely your attempts at diverting the conversation on something else, a giant light bulb turns on on top of his head. It brings the light of understanding through his eyeballs who suddenly look extra bright.

“You used it.” For a second, you consider packing up your things and just leave this fucking terrace along with the conversation. But you’re cold as fuck, the way home seems like too much torture to be going through alone.

Why are you like this?

Maybe there’s a vain hope that it will lead to some resolution. Some pleasant resolution. Maybe he won’t talk about it ever again if you just accept to have this conversation without showing the stubborn reluctance you’ve used each time.

“Yes, I did. So what?” His grin is blinding. It’s one of the very very wide, very very bright ones. So wide it shows all his teeth and it doesn’t even look like the cute bunny smile anymore. It’s the predatory grin. It’s intimidating to solely focus on therefore you chose to pick the corner of his eyes and the top of his nose, all wrinkled up that have anything but intimidation to them.

“You have no idea how happy that makes me.” You grimace. Indeed. You have no idea because you don’t even fucking understand.

“You’re a weirdo.”

“I’m just happy you used my dildo.” You scoff and almost choke at both his phrasing and the way he so naturally says the word while you’re outside. There’s no one as dumb as you to sit outside with this weather but still, someone passing by could hear.

Maybe there’s no deep further explanation to look for. Maybe it’s literally as simple as him getting you a present and him being happy that you found usefulness to it. Like most people. People are saddened sometimes pissed when they flop with presents. Maybe it’s that simple.

“Don’t say it like that.” He cackles like a witch and you know, that once again he’s just messing with you, knowing exactly what to do or say to tickle your patience.

“So I can gather it was good?” The worse of the nervous wave has passed. He asks quite nonchalantly. Perhaps it’s your ego wanting that but you hate the idea that you’d find yourself in a situation where he’s clearly more adult than you -even if on so many levels he is. If he can talk about it then you can. Try. You can try.

“Hm. Was nice.” You kind of sound the way you do when as a teen your mom would ask you about your day and you just didn’t want to answer because of laziness, lack of interest, lack of willingness to share, but that will do. He nods, smiles with his lips tight, rather fondly.

“How many times did you use it?”

Taking a deep breath, you mumble, shrugging faux casualness, “A few times.” More like a dozen times but he doesn’t need the details, does he? He nods again, still smiling, taking in your answer.

“Cool.” And he’s satisfied. With the answer and the turns of events as it seems.

There you go, you did it.

You resolved the thing.

Now he can leave you alone with your fantasies and your -not his but your- dildo and there wouldn’t be any further occasion to bring it up. You might be a coward but it’s perfectly fine by you.

Sounds absolutely peachy.

If he chooses to play his part right.

A/N: oh myyy, we’re getting somewhere arn’t we? i really hope you enjoyed this part, let me know your thoughts, scream your frustration, i’m all ears (or eyes). next update will be a double one because the first part is quite short. hoping you’re excited. i wish you a beautiful sunday and a lovely week. take care, lots of lots love.

Tag list: @infernal-alpaca @kaepjjangiya @channiespup @jinsonaz @kpopfandomftw @ggukkieland (sorry love)

IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER, PLEASE ASK IN THE COMMENT, THANK YOU :))

#btswriterscollective #networkbangtan #ksmutclub #ggukienet #bts fanfic #bts smut #bts angst #bts fluff #jungkook fanfic #jungkok smut #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #my writing

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lwt28brave · 3 years

Text

LT2 masterpost

If it was up to me, we would get an autumn or winter EP. Since it’s not up to me at all, here, enjoy this post with everything we know so far of LT2, which is to say, not much at all. Everything here is hypothetical. I’ll be updating every time I see something relevant. A little disclaimer that while this is a masterpost (kinda), it could be read as discourse (duh, it’s also a theory), AND it’s also by me, and you shouldn’t expect me to be serious at this point.

Due to me restraining myself, there’s no reference to any of the times he’s mentioned his guitar skills and him improving but I hope you know I cried every single time.

I’m also linking my old pinned here. It was written before AFHF and around the free merch thing that didn’t lead to much, but I still think I made some good points.

Possible tracks:

Copy of a Copy of a Copy

Change

Faith in the future??

369??

Possible names:

369

Faith in the future

When is the album coming out?

Your guess is as good as mine

Friday 28th of January 2022. Almost two years after Walls. It’s a Friday. It’s a 28th. What else can I say?

Here you can find @want-to-be-loved timelines for every month.

Here you can find @berlinini’s timeline of what Louis has been up to this year (2021).

The rest is under the cut. And here you can find a PDF version where Tumblr can't tell me how many pictures I can add.

2020

He said back on May 2th 2020 he wasn’t writing anything new yet.

(x)(x)(x)

Interestingly enough, he’s said many times after that that the album’s not ready cause he has no new experiences to drawn from. I won’t call him out because he does it himself.

May 4th. He liked a tweet from DMA’s Johnny Took saying they had to go write together again. Louis has been credited as an influence for them and (kind of) participated in their previous record, so I’m assuming he meant for their music and not his, but you never know.

Nothing(literally nothing??? how did we survive) until 11th of July. We all know what happened that day. We all celebrated it. Nonetheless, that’s not what I’m talking about here.

(x) So, by the beginning of July 2020 he was working on concepts and ideas for the new album. That was fifteen months ago. I know perfection takes time but…

Brief summary of important things that happened from then until the next mention of new music:

Louis left Syco!!!! 10 days later he rescheduled the tour for the first time. He followed Matt Vines on Twitter, probably so we could publicly shame him into doing something. Also, the 10thanniversary. He followed more people I wish he hadn’t.

Then more nothing until September. Not even a single tweet. The first merch drop was on the 28th of August but he just RT’ed the tweet. He first mentioned Free my Meal on the 25th of September. Then on October 1st Walls hit #1 on a lot of countries and Louis was incredibly happy and excited about it ^^

And then, that same day, October 1st, 2020, he dropped this bomb:

(x)

He also said it was too soon to be sharing new lyrics with us (x)

And, obviously, this tweet which is actually what made me start this whole post. I would hope you know mate.

(x)

He also told us he was cooking "banger after banger" and that he was incorporating more social themes into his music (x)(x) (I believe any social issue is a political issue but that’s not the point rn).

COPY OF A COPY OF A COPY?!?!

These next paragraphs are brought to you by my mind not remembering things and me not having any links. I’m assuming COACOAC came from those writing sessions that supposedly happened in October. Or in LA but I have no idea if he actually was in LA at any point other than a Daily Mail article putting him there on December which would have been too late, but I do remember that someone said he was in the studio in LA last autumn???? A rumor. Maybe. IDK. Did I mention already all of this is very hypothetical?? Well, this is it. I can’t even remember if this was October or November or what. So, take this with a grain of salt.

I’m also… taking the liberty to assume, if you must, that Copy wasn’t meant to be a Walls reject because it sounds more mature and darker and it has a vastly different tone that Walls songs. I know he’s said that song probably isn’t getting into the album, but I want to have faith (in the future) that I’m getting a studio version. (But also, Louis, if you’re reading this, first of all GET OUT OF MY BLOG second of all, please don’t ever feel pressured again to add a song to the album because we have already heard it before. It’s your art and it should always be under your own terms).

So yeah, I believe that Copy is either one of those four songs (then imagine the other three??!!) or was written around the 1st of October date.

---End of the Intermission---

Then not much important (other than sharing more about Marcus Rashford fight against food poverty and the 2nd merch drop) until he announced the livestream on the 24th of November. (x)

It wasn’t until a few days before the livestream date we even thought again about new music (jk, I know we’re always thinking about new Louis’ music). So, December 9th/10th, 2020. Nine months ago. We got our first taste of new music!

He made sure we knew Copy of a Copy of a Copy isn't a cover! (x) (x)

(x)

Ok, so that’s it for 2020. (I feel like I’m missing something from September 17th because tweet was deleted but maybe he was still talking about cucumbers. We might never know. Unless I understand how Tumblr tags work). Expected, cause Walls was released in 2020. We needed to let it sit for a while.

2021

Another Summary: Louis third tweet of the year was telling the UK government off. So was the fifth. What a good beginning. On the 26th of January, he said he prefers pancakes over waffles. I hope he meant pancakes other than his own. More importantly, he tweeted the infamous “you lot read into things too much”. Don’t get me started, Tomlinson. Don’t. Then the 31st came around and Walls was one. He tweeted this. How wise. And Project Defenceless happened!!

15th of February!! Who cares about Valentine Day when the next day we got this? ♥

(x)

So…AN EP?? AN EP?? PLEASE RELEASE AN EP.

“I’m sure I will have something out this year but unlikely that will be the album”. Unlikely but not impossible. Also. A single would be good. This is the second time he mentions releasing something in 2021 and he sounds surer about it than the first time around.

He also said that he isn’t sure we will get a studio version of Copy. And that the best bridges from Walls to LT2 are Walls, OTB, KMM and Copy. Can’t wait!

Then we jump to March 6th when he announced he was going to create his own management company. “Sometimes action is needed first to encourage the motivation and belief”. As we can tell he was already manifesting some stuff which will lead us to the numerology stuff/Tesla… kidding. Or not. We might never know.

On the 22nd of March he answered some questions:

He told us music was still his main focus ♥ mwha. (x) I included this tweet to guilt-trip him into giving us music in case he’s reading this even after I told him to leave. ILY.

(x) I’d love to get a visual EP this autumn. Just saying. It sounds like a lovely concept.

(x)

…next (I will get into it, I promise. I’m just mad).

On the 25th he left for Mexico until April 10th. You could assume it was just for the documentary where we got ten seconds of footage or admit the obvious: LT2 its a Mexican baby!!

On the 26th (so, not so far apart from that first 369) we got the first Faith in the Future mention: (x)

Back then we were innocent people who had no idea what was coming upon us. We still have no idea because what the fuck does he mean with these. Please explain. I have one braincell and I don’t use it enough for this. I’m linking some theories.

On the 30th of March he confirmed he was already working on the documentary. So AFHF was already on the works. Will it take this long for us to get the Veeps numbers? We also got this tweet: "Got a decent chorus idea down" (x).

Same person that got the “something out this year” exclusive. If you know something share with the class. Also. Is this Change? I feel like this could be Change but I also assume he wrote Change after hanging out with his friends or being in Doncaster. But who knows.

(x) And the second mention to 369.

(x) 15th of April. The second "Faith in the future".

On the 19th of April he announced that he had something BIG for us later on the year which turned out to be the Away From Home Festival ♥♥ (x) I love him so much.

Then on the 28th he announced the 369 merch drop (which it’s probably the Walls drop? Except that the TOU and KMM ones were “drop 1 and drop 2” and this was drop 369 which, again, makes no sense) but we still don’t know what 369 means.

Into May’ 21 we go.

He rescheduled tour again. And dropped another bomb (x).

He announced he has signed with BMG as an independent artist by RTing this tweet on May 10th. The article also says that he’s already working on writing and recording LT2. The timing… we don’t know. What this deal involves… we don’t know either. Bear with me here because I have a lot to say about this.

I think the deal is only a distribution one, but that BMG are interested in Louis and what he (us) could bring to the table. They were either present at the festival or watching it, but officially they had no involvement at all with it (everything is credited either to Louis own company, 78 Productions, or Charlie Lightening’s company). That’s the case for both giveaways too; the vinyl one and the tickets for the festival.

I think it would be an unbelievably bad move not to test the waters with BMG now or soon-ish. At least a single, to see how it performs. Due to the circumstances, it’s obvious there’re certain limitations on place but I want to see how they push it, whether the radio play exist this time around and if the song is playlisted and promoted and all that… I would also love to know, since it says he signed with BMG UK, but it also states it’s a global deal, how things are going to go on the US and other countries.

Yes, yes. I know those are all questions and no answers. But I know the same as you, sadly. If any of you know more than you’re letting on… again, share with the class.

Where was I? Yes, on the 25th of May Louis had a great day writing (x). Since the first time he had mentioned he was officially writing to this date there’s almost eight months. And I believe he was writing before October’ 20.

He followed Robert Harvey that day and, on the 28th of May (why is it always the 28th???) he was spotted at the studio for the first time.

June was an interesting month for the fandom ♥. Lots of LHL content which I will love and cherish for the rest of times. On June 4th, June 9th, and June 10th he was spotted at the studio, but I believe he was there more days.

(x)

This was posted on June 6th and captioned Studio. Charlie also shared it with “Mega tunes being put down, can’t wait for this @louist91 #louistomlinson #LT2” as the caption. This gives me 2019 (Elton-Joint) vibes. I like it. Feels like we’re getting closer to something.

He added the Milano date on the 9th too which I’m mentioning because I’m going alone. Anyone wanna go with me please? I’m nice and I never eat anything before a concert so you can have my food. On other news. It didn’t come home.

During July he was at the studio at least three days too. Probably more. Feels like more with all the fan pictures we got. Or was that June? Anyway, July 1st and 9th we got some videos from Robert Harvey and wearesuperhi, which is who Louis has been working with the most, that we know of. I don’t know for sure they’re from that day. And on July 5th we got an article and lots of pictures of Louis looking really good outside the studio.

On the 12th of July the first fans started getting the free, 369 bucket hat and print. We still don’t know what the purpose was other than to thanks fans. Maybe that was it. I want answers and I still think it relates to a future project (see theories above), but it could also just be a bridge with the Walls breaking.

He didn’t tweet about anything interesting for a while, mostly because he lost his phone (he either throwed it in the air or smashed it who knows). Then on the 29th of July he announced the festival!

I’m glossing over it because there’s already been a lot of talk about it (rightfully) and while it was a wonderful thing, it doesn’t have much to do with LT2.

Let’s talk Change!

On August 3rd he tweeted this about the setlist.

(x)

And this (x) on the 28th! I can’t stand him.

We didn’t get it, obviously. Because who was going to get that. But we read too much into things. Alright.

On the 16thof August Dave Gibson shared this post tagged #LT2 with the eyes emojis 👀👀👀. I believe this has to do both with Change but also with whatever else came out of that Mexico trip.

(x) Last relevant tweet related to LT2 is this one.

So, on the 30th of August we got Change and we cried, and we know that Change is going in the new album. He said it. With those exact words. He also said he was “getting a feeling for it”. This has to meant he already has a general idea of the vibe of the new album and what’s going in it!!!!!! (Right? RIGHT?).

Anyway, let’s go back a few weeks because some other things happened on August. He was at the studio a few more times. Or it was suggested that he was there. On the 17th and the 18th. (Why was it so time-pressing to be at the studio instead of rehearsing for the festival? There was no studio at all on the documentary. Which makes sense, but again, then why?).

On the day of the festival we got another mention of Faith in The Future that made me feel part of a cult ngl. The words were flashing on the screen for less than a second. Okay.

And then he tweeted those words again after watching the livestream/documentary on the 4th of September (x). This is what makes me suspect it's either the name of the album or of the single.

On the same day, we got some interesting quotes about LT2 on the documentary.

“Soon I’ll have to think about me second album, which in my head I’ll get the tour out of the way and then I’ll address that. So, I hadn’t really given it much thought, to be honest”.

“When every day is the same is hard to feel creative and it’s hard to have any kind of proper inspiration”.

“As season started to come back, I started writing again and it was great and some of these songs turned out alright”.

And I think this is it. I might be overlooking some important details but that’s what we know and what we don’t know.

So. Conclusions. That’s what you missed on Glee. I do believe the album is, if not mostly done, partially there. And yes, this post is pointless and never-ending but it’s all in here if you need to tell Louis “Hey, you said this, mate”.

#LT2 #Louis Tomlinson #Faith in The future #369 #Louis #LT #new music #idk what this is #but it's long #pinned

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goggles-mcgee · 4 years

Note

Okay, So I need to Ask Um, Got any salt on Marinette's Parents? Because as much As I love them in the show, They are almost never around to do anything.

Oh yeah definitely.

The show shows them to be loving supportive parents and I think a lot of us like to latch onto that when writing but when you take a step back, you realize they are almost never around and why? Because of their business. They are neglectful. Now it very well could be they don't mean to be, but the fact of the matter is, they are and as a result of that Marinette is very mature and always feels pressure to do things on her own or to make things perfect. That's a lot to put on a child.

Anyways mini rant over! There are 3 ideas on my Dead Sea Salt List that include Tom and Sabine salt and I shall tell them to you and the ways they are salted!

Idea 3. Marinette, The Rolling Stone:

This one is obvious here as this whole story is about Jagged and Penny adopting Marinette. Tom and Sabine like to think they know their daughter but the truth is they aren't around a lot. They don't even notice that she doesn't hang out with the girls in class anymore and hasn't done so in months for crying out loud! They don't even notice that she hasn't gone out to hang out with her friends either.

But then Marinette's friends come in and start telling them that Marinette is bullying the new girl, they don't even recognize Lila from when she almost got Marinette expelled, and Lila herself creates a sob story and well Tom and Sabine notice then and there just how often Marinette has been at home by herself. They fall for the lies.

And well, this is a blessing in disguise for them, they were getting busier with the bakery and thinking of opening up another location and doing that while juggling a teenager would be so difficult, especially a problem child. They decide to kick Marinette out, but they aren't "malicious" or "cold-hearted" they decide to emancipate her. They purely do it because they think they are protecting their family members by not letting Marinette manipulate them into thinking she's the sweet person they thought she was, and they want to protect their image. They don't want their family members to think ill of them.

Then Jagged Stone pops up wanting to commission Marinette, but Tom and Sabine tell them they grounded Marinette from designing and took away her sewing machine. He's livid and demands the reason why, they tell him and he just looks at them like they lost their heads, even asks if they did, because he knows there's no way Marinette would bully someone. They insist she has and she's changed and she's this horrible little liar and manipulator and that's why they are getting rid of her. It takes a lot for him not to get akumatized then and there but Jagged firmly says he'll adopt Marinette.

They try their best to talk him out of it but he's set. So they let him, they just know hope he knows he can't return her when he finds out they were right.

Life is good for them after they get rid of Marinette, that is until the interview. Nadja gets an exclusive interview with Jagged Stone, Penny Rolling and their new adoptive daughter that they have been raving about on social media. Nadja does nothing to hold back her disgust when she recounts what Marinette and her new parents had told her about Tom and Sabine kicking her out all because of a liar. The interview is an hour special where they debunk each and every single one of Lila's lies. And Tom and Sabine watch and the pits in their stomachs grow the more they watch.

After all that. Paris erupts. Gabriel literally passes out from all the anger and sadness he feels from his Miraculous and has to take sleeping medication and just sleep the day away. Everyone who had ever met Marinette was furious, not only at her school and friends, but at her parents too. Regulars who used to come in stopped. Which is a kind of a big deal in France, you pick a bakery and basically stick to it. Despite their products being good, people are hesitant to go to Tom and Sabine's, because how can they go to a place and expect to be treated well when the owners treated their own daughter so awfully and for what? For lies?

They can't even get a second location anymore, the owner of the place they were going to buy from refused their offer. They wanted someone who treasured baking and family to buy their place and they can see that Tom and Sabine don't treasure those ideals. They still get business, but it's not as good as it had been. Some people come in and buy something small but they always have something to say about Marinette, like how it's a shame she's not there, or how her cupcakes were always decorated the best, or how her smile always made their day. Little jabs that just made Tom and Sabine hurt more.

They tried to get Marinette back but to no luck. They tried to say the adoption wasn't legal because of the lies but that got slammed down pretty fast. They tried to talk with her anyway they could think of till she changed her number and Jagged and Penny threatened to take legal action against them.

Everytime they went out, it felt like they were being judged. Like people didn't even want to look at them.

Gina and Roland basically disowned them

Idea 6. Wish Me Away

Not a lot of salt but Tom and Sabine were getting more and more distant with Marinette the closer the big battle got. She tried to pretend she didn't notice but she did, they seemed to only be around ling enough to give her good mornings, obligatory 'I love you's', even when they had dinner together it felt like when they asked her how her day was they were only doing it because it was what parents did, not because they were genuinely interested. Everyday that got closer to the fight she had wanted to be honest and just tell them that she was being crushed under all the weight of her responsibilities but she knew if she did she would be met with disappointment and fake sympathy.

She knew it wasn't healthy, she knew it wasn't right, but Marinette figured she was better off than most kids so she never complained. Then the battle happened and the wish happened and honestly, her parents didn't notice she didn't come home. They figured she was at a friend's house. The second night it was a Sunday so they just figured she was still at a friend's. The third day it was Monday, a school day and nothing, she never came home for lunch which she always did, they remembered that at least. So they called the school to ask if she had been in that day but the school told them, very politely, that no one by the name Marinette Dupain Cheng ever went to their school.

Of course they freak out and assume this must be the work of an Akuma. But days pass by and they really start to get worried and try to get Nadja to help them but even she looks at them like they're crazy and calmly tells them they don't have a daughter. That's when they finally go up to Marinette's room and see it's just a normal attic. Then Marinette's classmates come by and her teacher and they ask where she is and they nearly weep because somebody else remembers her and they tell them what has been going on. They too think it's an Akuma.

Then Adrien comes by with a woman they've never met and he looks like he'll but they refrain from saying anything, they still keep their business going because they figure if it is an Akuma then Ladybug and Chat Noir will defeat it any day now and Marinette will come back. There are days when they forget that Marinette is missing and doesn't that just say something? But they have to tell Adrien that only a few people remember Marinette and they suspect it's an Akuma. They don't notice how pale the boy gets or the cold face his mother makes at the mention of an Akuma but they give them a couple discounted treats and send them on their way.

Then Ladybug makes an appearance on Nadja's network and says it's to give an announcement. She looks different, older, and her suit is also different but everyone is paying attention. She tells of the battle with Hawkmoth, Gabriel Agreste, that was the first big shock, she tells them that she was betrayed by Chat Noir, but she would not give out his name as he was already living out his punishments, she tells them that Hawkmoth made his wish and the world was paying for it, that Gabriel and Chat were paying for it, they lost someone dear to them, for Gabriel it was Nathalie, for Chat it was the previous Ladybug, Marinette Dupain Cheng...their existences had been erased from the universe but those who had wronged them or failed them would be punished with the memories of them.

Tomnand Sabine froze at that because it made sense, and at the same time didn't. How did they fail Marinette? They just couldn't understand it. Gina didn't remember having a granddaughter but she remembered Tom and Sabine calling and asking about a Marinette, and in a rare moment she had been in Paris during the announcement and had heard what Ladybug had said. She cried for the little girl she didn't know but she was angry at her son and his wife because they clearly remembered her so they were being punished, and she could imagine why. Their bakery was always their top priority, it was their baby, everything else came second. They never wanted a baby, they never said it out loud but she knew, so she could only imagine what this Marinette had to go through and she cried for the girl.

Roland remembered being helped by the heroes but he doesn't remember why but when he watched the announcement he thinks it may be because of the granddaughter he can't remember, he didn't want to see his son or wife, it had been that way for awhile, but he felt his heart wrench for the granddaughter he couldn't remember and would never get to know. Roland was even more disappointed in his son when he got a call asking if he remembered this Marinette, because it meant he had failed his own daughter and their protector. He knew he wasn't the best father but he felt outraged on behalf of the granddaughter he lost.

People found out that Tom and Sabine remembered and so they found out they were being punished, which made people a bit wary of them.

[The "new" Ladybug is literally just Tikki using Trixx's illusions, Tikki is hella petty in this fic, also okay that was more salt that I thought]

Idea 9. Ivy's Sapling:

This one definitely doesn't have a lot of salt towards them but there is some. They do care about Marinette and they see her as a niece more than a daughter. So they aren't really as involved in her life as maybe they should be but she understands that they didn't ask for her. When the problems with Lila start up they want to believe in her and they do at the beginning but they start to question of they could be true because of her background. From what her and Gina said, she was from the bad part of Gotham and so was her mother, they never told them she was Poison Ivy's kid, they just know that Marinette's mother goes by Pamela when she talks with Marinette on the phone.

So they don't fully turn on Marinette but they do start to be wary and more questioning, they don't trust her as much as they did before which does hurt her but they don't fully believe Lila and her classmates, or more like they don't want to believe.

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pluviophile-bookworm · 3 years

Text

HSMTMTS 2x10: New and a bit alarming... ok, very alarming

I don't even know at this point if I'm more nervous or excited for this episode. I've done my waiting and, well, whatever lies ahead, good or bad, or a little bit of both, I just can't wait anymore, even though I haven't been so scared to press play since... well, since last week. Guess I should just go for it, then:

Ooh, shady Seb doing the recap! We love to see it. Like, seriously, I'm anxious about the Seblos fight, but shady Seb is kind of my new favourite Seb.

I just... Ashlyn's acting is top tier. Emotional connection to the material? Superb! Chemistry with her co-lead... well, he'd have to be co-leading for any chemistry to be possible. I love Ricky, and I feel for him with all he's been through, but he's just not lead material right now. And it shows. Especially next to Ashlyn, who is killing it!

Miss Jenn is on the verge of a bloody mental breakdown and I just... wish I could do something to make things better. She reminds me of my mum when a deadline approaches for her to submit an article, and I just feel for her right now. Gosh, I'm feeling for everybody today. My empathy seems to be at its peak and I might just burst from all these emotions this episode is making me feel even before the 5-minute mark.

Ok, but Miss Jenn being stressed means Carlos is stressed for two, which means... this is a really bad time for him and Seb to have personal problems. My heart just can't handle it.

Wow... I never thought I'd see the day! The two leads are actually talking to each other! This is a mid-July miracle!

Why does everyone keep pretending their HSM was good? It was a flaming hot mess! A child could see that.

Miss Jenn needs a lot of work on her 'gracious face'. I, like Carlos, have quite some notes. Only mine aren't exactly, how do you say... verbally formulated quite yet.

Did Carlos just refer to Miss Jenn as 'mother'? Because yes.

I've been in a couple of local theatre productions in my day, but none of them had actual physical sets — we relied on the audience's imagination quite a lot — so I wouldn't know what a good set is made of... but even I can tell that plywood and Elmer's glue = not good.

Kourtney is a multi-tasking icon and we love her. I feel like I don't say this enough, but she deserves all the love.

Ooh, shady Seb is... well, shady! 'Quit school and get a job at the pizza shop?' — I mean, you don't see Reddy or Kourtney (or Howie, for that matter) quitting school in order to work at the Slices! Those kids juggle it all and, as someone who's never had to balance school and a job all at once, they have my deepest admiration.

Still, I think they should have thought about 'inventing' something re: transformation earlier than this point. The personal drama has taken up too much of their time.

Why does everyone keep inviting people over to Ashlyn's? I mean, it's not like I've ever heard her complain, but the girl needs some rest! And her house is not a public space.

Oh, so they're making this into a contest? I mean, I have never been a fan of competition, but to each their own. And Redlyn are hosting! This is going to be so beautiful! (You know, unless the boys try to sleep — see my post from yesterday about Reddy's background noise machine)

'I'm not worried. But North High should be!' Ooh, I love this look on Ashlyn! See, there's a lead to take notes from! And Ricky should be the first to do so. Take notes about what a lead acts like, I mean.

Oooooh, Big Red claps back! We love to see it. Although, you know, it stems from the fact that he's nervous about coming up with a solution to the transformation problem. 'I get bossy around the power tools' — Yes, sweetie, and I love that look on you. Maybe you should be around power tools more often, if that helps.

Ughhh, look what the cat brought in! Lily (I wish I knew her last name so I could refer to her by it exclusively, but we'll have to make do). I hate that girl. She reminds me quite exactly of the girl who bullied me in seventh grade to the point where I wished I'd die before having to deal with her at school again. She and Lily both bring out my aggressive side, and I hate that about them.

Ricky — 'so good at being a leading man'? I don't know what Lily is playing at here, but Ricky has not shown himself to be a very good leading man this season. He has the potential to be, but he has not fulfilled it by this point. Sure, he supports his friends and they support him, but that's basic decency. Not yet good leadership. No hate on Ricky, just the truth.

'I vaguely remember him' — please tell me this is setup for Ricky leading Lily on and then slamming the door in her face with the truth. The way I see it, he's been given a chance here. A chance to be the supportive, protective best friend Big Red deserves. I just... have a lot of ideas about this and I don't want it to end badly instead.

'I'm just not well-liked here, and I don't know what to do' — well, of course you aren't well-liked, you little— (ok, ok, calm down, breathe, 10, 9, 8...) whatever. I mean, she hasn't even considered basic decency, as it seems. Must be a new concept to her.

'Don't start with me, Carlos!' Wow. As much as I hate it that my two faves' only interaction in so long is so hostile, I kind of like this side of Big Red. I wonder what other sides of himself he's been hiding.

Listen, I don't like Seb being patronised and babied, but... 'Chip, this is your mother speaking: go call your mother!' made me laugh so hard. They're leaning into the on-stage family dynamic and I live for it.

EJ's idea of using old skateboards for the spinning contraption is... a brilliant callback to the fact that Ricky and Big Red were first characterised as skateboarders... you know, before diving headfirst into the theatre thing. And it feels like it might actually work.

Miss Jenn's excitement at seeing Mr Mazzara ('Benjamin!!!') is perhaps only topped by the fact that he was halfway home, got a text from her and instantly went back to the school. I mean, these two have something that's really big.

Miss Jenn referring to the kids as 'my children', combined with Carlos calling her 'mother' earlier just warms my heart so much! Those guys really are family. I live for it.

Ok, but... as clear as it is that the Wildcats are very far behind NH in terms of budget, rehearsal time and who knows what else, I hate seeing Miss Jenn resigned to them losing. I want to see her have faith in them, talk about how they will win, and, in her own words, 'trust the process'. I mean, I guess it's good that, as a teacher, she wants to prepare her kids for a possible defeat (and I mean really possible if they don't step up their game immediately, especially some of them * cough* Ricky *cough *), but a team that goes out to the field expecting to lose has a very minimal chance of winning.

Despite everything I've been saying again and again about Nini lately, the fact that she just delivered a very different 'No, Seb' has just redeemed her. See, this one wasn't dismissive or patronising — this was like, 'no, Seb, don't put yourself down' and I love that spin on the catchphrase I'd grown to hate. See, many things can be redeemed. And some simply cannot. * cough* Devil's spawn Lily *cough *. Also, Seb being self-conscious about the fact that Carlos 'doesn't have many options' at East Hight is the perfect setup for In a Heartbeat — meaning they will either have a chance to talk about their issue, or they have a telepathic connection, in which case, what kind of soulmate stuff is that?

'You're my sister; he's my cousin' — yeah, Ash, putting it like that makes it sound a lot weirder than it should, but I do get what you're trying to say. This is not a drill! Ashlyn is a Portwell shipper (heck, maybe even the captain of that ship) — but I feel like we already knew that.

'Why'd I never hear about this?' — and there it goes. Within the same scene, Nini was redeemed and then made aggravating again. What does she care if Gina thought Ricky sent her chocolates? He didn't. Because he and Gina can't be anything but very good friends. And I feel like good friends is what Gina needs. Maybe that's why I wanted EJ to be that for her initially (or it was because I'm aroace and don't tend to notice romantic attraction between fictional characters — or real people for that matter — unless it's explicitly stated to be there). But I've been on board of the majestic S.S. Portwell for a few weeks now and it's finally about to set sail.

Yeah, Nini, get a root beer, calm the heck down and get over it!

'Your other clockwise!' — Why does this even need to be said? How many 'clockwise's are there? I absolutely understand why Big Red gets the way he gets around power tools. I'd be on edge too, if the people I was trying to work with didn't know what way clockwise is. Still, I feel like by the time I'm 30, nobody younger than me would have a reason to know what way clockwise is, and I don't know if I feel bad or neutral about it.

Oh, so there's no telepathy involved in Seblos' problem resolution — it's been Redlyn's good communication all along. I might have known.

Ooh, Portwell is being discussed on both sides! PORTWELL NATION HOW WE FEELING

Nini? Why is everything about Nini? There's no way everything is about Nini. In all seriousness, though, EJ's worries about letting the next girl go seem valid in regards to Gina, given that she explicitly stated (though not within earshot of EJ or anyone who could have tipped him off) that she needs someone who will show up and stay. But they'll figure it out. They'll find a way. I know it. They will, or I will riot, and I know I won't be alone in that.

Ooh, Howie is giving Kourtney the original blueprints! Looks like Reddy isn't the only one who has a spy on the inside.

Ahhh, Ricky! Not 'Let You Go' again. I haven't cried to it in three days and I was not ready to break that streak. But... wait, this is where Carlos approaches Ricky to ask him for help with writing a song for Seb, isn't it? I am definitely ready for this.

Oh, is it... is it Ricky who suggests Carlos write a song for Seb? Now that is what a good leading man looks like.

'I'm adjusting to being called bro' — me too, Carlito, me too. But... this scene must have been so emotional for Josh, given that he hadn't come out yet. I remember him crying during The Climb and... all I'm saying is I want Ricky to come out at some point, too.

Oh gosh oh gosh oh gosh... they were just talking about love languages and that's when Carlos shows up? Cinematic. Wait, there's Portwell too? This is what dreams are made of.

My oh my oh my! Risotto! For real this time. I might have just teared up. (Full disclosure: I did.) I've only had Portwell for about three weeks, but if anything happens to them, I will... you know how the meme goes. [side note: Wait, when I said 'for real this time', I was not expecting EJ would say it, much less word for word. Am I... writing this show now? It's usually my dad who predicts people's lines in TV shows]

'Not that I know of'... excuse me while I hyperventilate! These two are literal soulmates. They might share a brain, too, for all that I know. Portwell nation you ok guys?

I love that Ricky helped Carlos out with this song and is supporting him through it, but... I just might have preferred for him not to be there. I kind of need Seblos to have this moment to themselves. But, you know, with the way they feel about each other it might as well be like they're alone in the universe, let alone the room.

Ok, but Frankie's voice... brings out feelings in me that I didn't know I was capable of. Make of that what you will. Also, I'm not sobbing my eyes out, you are.

Ahhh Reddy my sunshine my sweet boy I love you but why did you have to cut Seblos' moment short? They were going to kiss, I know it. Oh well, they probably will, later on. Off-screen probably, but who cares? Not everything is for us to see. At least Carlos and Ricky had a moment there... Carlos calling Ricky 'bro' made me more emotional than I expected. It's like Miss Jenn says in s1: 'They're best bros, and that's a sacred thing... for reasons I will never understand'.

Ricky's acting sounds like a cat about to spit up a hairball, and it's so funny... in a scene that is supposed to be arguably the most dramatic of the entire play, that is not a good thing.

Oh my, oh my... you did not! You did not just end the episode with Ricky taking a fall from who knows how high. I was not ready. This episode was entirely too much for me. I will need 10 to 15 business days to recover from this, and we all know there aren't that many. But in the meantime you'll find me obsessively listening to In a Heartbeat for hours on end. Seriously, this episode is too much.

#hsmtmts #hsmtmts s2 #ricky bowen #nini salazar-roberts #gina porter #ej caswell #ashlyn caswell #ashlyn moon caswell #big red redonovich #carlos rodriguez #seb matthew-smith #kourtney greene #hsmtmts miss jenn #hsmtmts mr mazzara #jnk #seblos #portwell #redlyn #jenzara

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flying-elliska · 4 years

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one of the most impactful things I have read lately are two of French author Edouard Louis' books, Pour en finir avec Eddy Bellegueule and Qui a tué mon père (translated into English as The End of Eddy and Who Killed my Father). It's been two months and I'm still thinking about it.

The first book is an 'autobiographical novel' about the author's childhood growing up as an obviously gay boy in one of the poorest areas of France, until he leaves and reinvents himself as a writer. It's fraught with bigotry, abuse, bullying, violence, deprivation and social despair, and it's one of the most harrowing things I have ever read. It reads as many things as once : a recognition of trauma, an angry exorcism, a cry for society at large to pay attention, and to be honest, as a horror story.

It was criticized by some in France as portraying the working class in a manner that was too negative, which tells me they missed the point entirely...ironic for a book by someone who actually grew up poor - one of my least favorite things ever is progressives telling a marginalized person they can't talk about their own experiences because they don't fit the desired mold. (The French love to romanticize the working class and I'm pretty sure it's often an avoidance mechanism.)

The point of the book is so obviously not about 'look at how terrible and bigoted those poor people are'. Little Eddy spends a big part of the narrative trying to escape - himself at first, then his family/circumstances and the persistent homophobia everywhere. In the end of the book, he finally manages to get accepted into a fancy high school in the city on a scholarship and tries really hard to fit in. The last scene of the book is a bunch of his - educated, upper/middle class - classmates throwing homophobic taunts at him, starting the cycle anew. I can't think of a clearer way to say 'this is not a story about a sad gay boy escaping the evil bigoted countryside for the city and then everything was wonderful!!!! this is a story about a systemic, pervasive problem.'

One of the key arguments of the book, to me, is how homophobia, sexism and bigotry in general are both a product and a reproduction mechanism of social and economic exclusion. For instance, he describes how the norms around what it means to be a man in his village (being tough, disobeying authority, quitting school early to go work at the factory, drinking alcohol, neglecting your own health, fighting over women, repressing your feelings, etc) perpetuates the cycle of poverty ; but again this isn't 'oh these people are so stupid' and more 'these people are trapped'. Because he makes it evident how degrading and dehumanizing poverty can be, this masculinity reads as a desperate attempt to cling to a certain amount of dignity - it's an extremely dysfunctional coping mechanism. At the same time, anyone falling outside of the mold is violently ostracized (like Eddy, who tries and fails to fit in). So the system keeps reproducing itself.

In Who Killed my Father, the author makes his political argument clearer. This is more of an essay, centering on his father, arguably the most complex figure in the first novel. The man is an angry, bigoted alcoholic who makes his family miserable ; at the same time he is the son of an abusive father who makes a point of honor to never hit his kids or wife even though it's very normalized in this context. In this essay the author keeps talking about the moments of almost tenderness with his father that haunt him, the picture he has of him doing drag in his youth, the fact that the father tried to leave the village when he was young to find a better life for himself with a close friend but failed and had to come back - the moments of what-ifs, of trying to struggle free from the cycle, when the system appears almost fragile and not so unbreakable after all, that the son kept holding close like a sort of talisman.

The narrative is structured around the fact that his father injured his back working in a factory and that he had to keep doing physical labor afterwards for money, instead of resting to recover, until it completely destroyed his body. Now he finds himself bed-bound at 53. Louis inquires into who is responsible for this premature 'death'. After considering individual choices, he turns towards political decisions - the successive governments, left and right, who have been destroying the French welfare system for decades and accelerating inequality. The point is to step out of the neoliberal obsession with personal responsibility and who is guilty and who is a bad or good person, and look at systems.

An element that isn't focused on but hovers over the story constantly is that this village is one where the majority of the population consistently votes for the extreme right National Front party in most elections. The book is too angry and nuanced to be some stupid "it's not their fault that they're racist because they're poor!" argument. It doesn't make any excuses for how awful this is but instead illustrates how dehumanization replicates itself, how people being denied basic dignity leads to them wanting to deny it to others. If you want to really understand the rise of the far right you have to look at where the inequality comes from in the first place, and how easy it is for people in power to wash their hands of it by blaming the bigoted masses. (Just like you can blame societal ills on minorities ! Two for one strategy.)

Towards the end of the essay, the author talks about how proud his father is of his son's literary success - for a book who clearly depicts him as a horrible person ! And this is a man who has spent his life openly despising anything cultural, because it never showed him a life like his own. But maybe now he feels seen, now he knows people want to read about these things. Maybe there is a reclamation of dignity through looking at the horror head on. Maybe his son somehow slipping through the cracks of the cycle gives him more room. The man stops making racist comments, and instead asks his son about his boyfriend. Most importantly, he asks his son about the leftist politics he's engaged in. They talk about the need for a revolution.

I think what strikes me the most is this attitude of "wounded compassion" that permeates the book. What do you do when your parents are abusive but even after you grow up, you can't help but still love them, and you know they've been shaped by the system that surrounds them ? Recognizing, speaking the harm is essential. You need to find your own freedom, sense of worth, and safety. You need to dissect the mechanisms at hand so they lose at least some of their power over you. You need to find people who love and believe you. But then what? Do you dismiss your persistent feelings of affection and care for those who hurt you as a sign you're just fucked up in the head ? You could just decide to never speak to them again, and it would be justified, but is that really what is going to heal you the most? It's important to realize you have the choice. But there are no easy conclusions.

This makes me think of a passage I have just read in Aversive Democracy by Aletta Norval. The essential ethos of radical democracy, she says, is about taking responsibility for your society, even the bad parts, instead of seeing them as a foreign element you have to cleanse yourself of. It's too fucking easy for queer progressives, especially the middle class urban kind, to talk about dumb evil hicks, to turn pride into a simple morality tale, and forget that any politics that don't center the basic dignity and needs of people are just shit. The injury is to you and by you and you have a duty of care just as much as a duty of criticism. (And this is obviously not only applicable to class matters.) You can't just walk away and save your sense of moral purity. (This is not an argument that the oppressed are responsible for educating the oppressors ; it's about how privilege is not an easy simple ranking and it is too damn easy to only focus on the ways in which you are oppressed and forget the ways in which you may have more leeway.)

There is no absolute equivalence between political and family dynamics but the parallel feel very relevant somehow. Several truths can coexist at once : you needed help and it was not given. You were let down. It's important to recognize that people are responsible of how they treat each other. You need to call out what isn't ok and stand up for yourself. At the same time, there is a reason why things are like this. Making people into villains is often bad strategy (within reason!), and in the end, easy dichotomies are often an instrument of power. The horrors you have been through might have given you a very specific wisdom and grace you do not have to be afraid of ; you are not tainted by your compassion (it is very much the opposite of forced forgiveness ; it has walked through the fire of truth.)

To me these books fit into what French literature does best, sociological storytelling a la Zola or Victor Hugo - the arguments aren't new and they can come across as heavy handed, even melodramatic. But I'll argue that the viscerality is the point, how the raw experience of misery punches through any clever arguments about how exploitation persists for the greater good of society. Really worth reading if you can do so with nuance.

#edouard louis #french literature #france #queer culture #queer literature #lgbt books #bookblr #also just like the first book is a walking trigger warning in every possible direction so like careful #also the dude is literary buddies with ocean vuong and im curious to see if there are any parallels there #long post #poli sci

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jawritter · 4 years

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Elf

Summary: Maybe being stuck at home for Christmas with Dean during a snow storm, isn’t so bad after all.

Warnings: Light Smut, unprotected smut, language, fluff. That’s about it really.

Word Count: 2814

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Prompt: Elt

A/N: This fic was written for @janicho88 100 follower Christmas Celebration! Congratulation on the new milestone hun! This fic was also beta’d by the lovely @miss-neard95!! Thanks so much love!! As always please do not copy my work! Feedback is golden! I hope you all enjoy this one! We need a little Christmas in September! I mean hey? Why not? LOL

Want more? Check out my Masterlist, or become a patreon for exclusive fics!

***MASTERLIST*** ***BECOME A PATREON***

You shivered as a cold draft of air blew into the Bunker behind you, Dean closing the door as quickly as he could with his hands full of groceries.

It had been snowing for three solid days now, and there were no signs of letting up any time soon. Dean was convinced that this was how the world was going to end - you were all going to freeze to death. He hated the cold, hated the snow, and more than that, he hated the holidays that usually came with this kind of weather.

You and Dean made your way towards the kitchen with this week’s supplies, as well as the next in your hands. Normally you would only buy enough for a couple of days, but since the weather conditions only seemed to worsen, you figured it might be best to stay hunkered down for a little while.

You dumped the bags down on the counter, Dean mimicking your actions, before the both of you shrugged out of your coats, throwing them down over the table in the corner with a huff as you looked at the sprawling display of things in front of you that needed to be put away.

“Okay,” Dean said, warming his hands by blowing on them and rubbing them together as his piercing green eyes scanned the items on the countertop. “You put away the freezer stuff, and I’ll clear up everything else except your lady products.”

A wicked smirk tugged on your lips as you grabbed the box of Tampons out of the bag, waving them around in front of his face in a manner that you knew was childish, but Dean seemed to bring out the brat in you.

“You mean these lady products, Dean?” You asked, giving him a cheeky smile that could make the Cheshire Cat jealous.

Dean's wrinkled nose with his lips in a grimace was the cutest look of disgust you had ever seen, not that his perfect face wasn't a factor, swatting your hand away like you were holding something revolting.

“Yes, that. Now come on, I want to get out of these jeans, and change into something warmer.” He turned his back to you in mock annoyance as you placed the tampons back on the counter with a chuckle, and started putting the frozen foods away.

It was quiet in the Bunker for the most part. Sam was snowed in at Jody’s when he’d gone up there last week to work on a case with the girls, and that just left Dean and you alone in the Bunker for the foreseeable future-or at least until the snow melted enough for Sam to make it home.

Cas and Jack were on some sort of 'Angel business' and neither of you, dared asking exactly what that was. Some things you were just better off not knowing until there was no way to ignore them.

Christmas was two days away, and while Dean never really made a big deal about the holidays, you always enjoyed celebrating them. It was the only thing you ever looked forward to as a kid growing up in the hunting life, something your mother tried to hold on which became a normal for you. It was the only reminiscent of your childhood, and something that you clinged to for comfort.

Once you were done, you saw that Dean was still working, so you grabbed the sanitary products and made your way to your room to change into your fuzzy pajama pants, and one of Dean’s old flannel you had stolen from him when you had first moved into the Bunker.

You didn’t need said lady products right now, but you didn’t want to be trapped here without them either. It sucked to be a female because you had to make sure you were prepared for these types of situations, hunter or otherwise. You never knew when you were going to need them, but it was usually at the most inconvenient moments of your life.

You smiled as you made your way from the bathroom after stashing the box away to your bedroom to change, thinking about Dean’s adorably childish reaction to you messing with him in the kitchen just now.

You knew he was just playing with you. Dean wasn’t bothered by something as small as a box of tampons, but he did love to get a rise out of you and did seem to enjoy the attention of any form he could get.

So he liked to be playfully grumpy with you, knowing you thought it was more than a little cute.

You were just finishing up throwing your hair into a messy bun when you heard a soft knock on the door and turned around to see a very confused Dean, holding a DVD case in his hand.

“Y/N, what’s this?” He asked, holding up the new Elf DVD that you had just purchased while on the supply run to watch later tonight after Dean went to bed.

“Whatever it is, it's mine!” You snatched the DVD from his hand.

A smirk settled deeply on his handsome features as he strutted his way through the door towards you. Your eyes took him in, his sweatpants hanging low on his hips and his tightly fitted T-Shirt did very little to hide his well toned chest and shoulders.

“Elf? Really Y/N/N, I took you to be more of a 50 Shades type of girl,” Dean said, flopping down on his stomach across your bed, his elbows bent with his smug face resting in his hands. He’d obviously found a way to get back at you for the little teasing back in the kitchen, and you just knew that he wasn't going to let you brush him off that easy.

There had always been an undeniable sexual tension between you two, but neither of you ever acknowledged it. No, you weren’t dating, you weren’t friends with benefits, you were literally just friends. But that didn’t stop you from enjoying the view of the curve of his ass as he laid strewn across your bed.

Maybe you were more of a 50 Shades girl, but he didn’t need to know that. You liked the friendship between the two of you. He was the greatest thing that ever happened to you. He was your best friend, your rock, the person you went to when you needed someone to lean on. You couldn’t fuck that up just because you had feelings for him, there was no way that was ever gonna happen.

“Well Dean, we can’t be all kinky all the time, sometimes you need something a little vanilla,” you answered his question with a suggestive wink in order to keep up the banter that he’d started, but when you turned to look at him, your hair fell out.

Dean sat up cross legged in the middle of your bed when you huffed looking in the mirror, watching you as you started fixing your hair again with an unreadable look on his face.

“Well, let’s watch it,” he said with a shrug.

You turned on the spot and stared at Dean like he’d popped out a second head.

“What?”

“Let’s watch it.”

“You wanna watch Elf? You feeling okay, Dean?”

Dean’s eyes narrowed at that, sticking his tongue out at you before jumping off of the bed and grabbing the DVD from your hands.

“ Dean Cave. Fifteen minutes.” He yelled over his shoulder, and you watched his retreating back as he made his way down the hall to start the movie for the two of you.

Shaking your head you laughed as you made your way to the kitchen to grab a few beers before you walked back to the Dean Cave.

Dean was always full of surprises. Just when you thought you had him figured out, he did something you never would expect. Like agreeing to watch a Christmas movie with you, when you knew he hated Christmas.

It wasn’t like it was a great mystery why that was. His father didn't exactly qualify for the parent of the year nomination, and Bobby, well he tried, but he wasn’t that into it either. Good family memories just weren’t something Dean had.

When you stepped in the Dean Cave, Dean had pulled out one of the oversized blankets you kept in the laundry room for nights like this when you would all pile up in here and watch TV, and was waiting for you with the remote in his hand.

“I brought beer,” you said, holding the two clinking bottles high above your head as you approached the couch. Dean grinned at you before flipping the covers open for you., offering you to sit down beside him.

“I knew there was a reason I kept you around,” Dean said with an impish smirk, his lips grabbing your attention that you wanted to feel on your own.

You settled comfortably next to him as Dean hit play, throwing his arm around you and tucking you into his side before giving you a chaste kiss on the top of your forehead. It wasn't anything unusual for Dean, but it made your heart flutter in your chest all the same.

You curled into his chest, laying your head against his shoulder as his arms wrapped tightly around you with your legs on his lap. He felt warm and safe, and you honestly could have given everything you had to stay just like this forever.

As the credits rolled on the movie, Dean reached over and flipped the TV off, leaving both of you in the dark room with the only light from the hallway peeking in through the cracked door.

“I have to admit, for a Christmas movie, it wasn’t that bad.” Dean said, wrapping the blankets tighter around the two of you instead of getting up like you had expected him to.

Dean’s large hand brushed a stray hair away from your face as he held you against him, his face so close to yours, you could feel the warmth of his breath fanning over your skin.

“See, maybe you should do what I suggest more often,” you fired back, trying to keep the conversation light and ignore his hand that was under the covers slowly creeping its way up your thigh as he laughed.

“I don’t think so sweetheart. Tomorrow we’re watching Death Race, like it or not.”

Even in the darkness of the room Dean’s eyes seemed to sparkle just a little, and the army of butterflies in your stomach started to take flight against you.

You could have sworn he was moving closer to you although it seemed impossible as he held you closer to his large frame.

“Dean, I don’t know if this is a good idea,” you whispered as his lips came ever so close to your own that they were almost brushing.

He just chuckled in response, resting his forehead against yours. “I don’t see the problem, I mean, people already think we’re a couple now.”

Before you could even register what he was saying, Dean’s lips captured yours in a sweet, slow kiss that made your toes curl and your breath hitch in your throat. It didn’t last long, but it was long enough to leave you breathless as he pulled away from you.

“I know I joke around a lot, but I can be as soft as you need me to be, if you’d give me the chance to show you.”

You could literally feel your heart pounding in your ears as his eyes scanned yours, fear of rejection lingering not far below the surface.

You don’t know what made you react, you just did. In a spurt of bravery you closed the distance between you, your lips crashing into his as his arms wrap even tighter, pulling your body flush against his.

You could feel his excitement growing by the prominent bulge that was forming in his sweatpants as his teeth caught your bottom lip, tugging it just hard enough to pull a moan from your lips.

“Let me show you baby, let me show you what you do to me,” Dean murmured, his hands tracing the skin of your back.

You had wanted this to happen for so long, that it almost felt like a dream. But one thing was for sure, you weren’t going to push him away anymore. Dean was the kind of person that took things to heart, and if you rejected him, even if it was out of your own fear, you knew you would lose him forever.

“Then show me, Dean.” You mutter against his lips.

Not even for one second did Dean break eye contact with you as he pulled your shirt over your head before finding your lips again with his own, dominating your mouth, his hands explored the now exposed skin. You didn’t miss the low growl that came from him when he discovered you’d decided to forgo wearing a bra. His hands slid over your exposed breath before running his thumb over each nipple. His tongue licked into your mouth in a way that made you shiver in his hold. The man was good, and he hadn't even gotten started yet.

His hands wandered to the waistband of your pants and pulled them down in one smooth go, leaving you fully exposed before him.

His eyes travelled shamelessly over your body, his white teeth sinking into his lower lip.

“You're fucking beautiful, sweetheart,” Dean said, his voice deep and dripping with lust.

“You’re wearing too many clothes, Winchester,” you purred.

It took him mere seconds to strip out of his clothes. You noticed that he’d also chosen to go without his underwear and you couldn't help the smirk forming on your lips.

He was gorgeous. His well-toned body from a life of hunting and killing monsters hovered over your small frame on the couch you were laying on. His thick length was heavy and dripping against your already wet folds as his lips found your throat, running his teeth lightly over your collar bone before sucking his mark there.

“I’ve wanted you like this for so fucking long, baby girl,” Dean said between kisses as he rutted on your folds. His blunt tip created just enough friction on your sensitive clit to drive you crazy and want more.

“Then have me Winchester, what are you waiting for?” You asked him teasingly.

Dean repositioned his hips, and with one smooth thrust he was fully seated inside of you without warning, his face hidden in the crook of your neck as he panted above you, holding himself still and giving you time to adjust.

You had never been so full, so stretched as you were right now. It took you a moment before you were able to roll your hips against his, giving him the push he needed to start moving. At first he set a slow, steady pace. Each stroke of his cock against your already clenching walls driving you higher and higher until his tip hit that special spot deep inside of you at which you cried out.

“Fuck, Dean,” you moaned, before his lips found yours in a deep kiss that was all tongue and teeth.

You could already feel that familiar coil begin to wind tight in your abdomen with each thrust of his hips.

Dean could tell you were getting close, and he picked up a faster, deeper pace, hitting your g-spot directly everytime.

“Come on baby, I can feel you're close. Let go,” he said breathlessly, his rhythm beginning to falter.

It was like that was the command your body had been waiting for, and you came with a silent scream as your walls clamped down around him, and his hips locked in place as he spilled his seed deep inside of you, your walls milking every drop his body could give you.

When you both came back down from your high Dean laid down next to you in the small space, pulling the covers over the two of you and snuggling into you.

You both stayed there in silence for a minute before you finally had the courage to speak.

“Where does this leave us, Dean?” You asked him as his lips brushed over the exposed skin of your shoulder.

“It means your mine now, baby girl. Merry Christmas,” He said, his voice cocky and he was back to being the Dean you loved so much

Turning around you swatted him playfully on his arm before settling back into his hold, nuzzling into his chest before letting out a content sigh of your own.

“Best Christmas present ever,” you tell him before drifting off to sleep in the arms of the man you would always love with your whole heart, but now, he was yours and you, his.

Forever Tags: @deanwanddamons @rvgrsbrns @bi-danvers0 @onethirstyunicorn @i-love-superhero @akshi8278 @lyss-dw79 @magssteenkamp @lemondropirwin @squirrelnotsam @hobby27 @spnbaby-67 @mrsjenniferwinchester @defenderrosetyler @screechingartisancashbailiff @thecreatiivecorner @aflamboyanceofgays @vicmc624 @busy-bee-angel-misska @justanotherwinchester @brilovesdeanwinchester @idksupernatural @lyarr24 @amandamdiehl @love-jackles-37-blog @miraclesoflove @waywardsistershy @emoryhemsworth @dean-winchesters-gardian-angel @softsebastian @tatted-trina6 @deanmonandnegansbitch @hayleeharling @flamencodiva @coldmuffinbanditshoe @bxbyizzy @rain-dance-goblin @itmejado @supernatural3002

#dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x you #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester smut #dean winchester one shot #fluffy dean winchester #dean x reader #dean x you #dean smut #spn smut #spn fanfiction #spn fanfic #spn #jawritter #jensen ackles #elf #janicho88 100 follower celebration

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korissideblog · 3 years

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So! I decided I wanted to info dump about my bby, and I’m gonna do it here. Consider this a living document, cause ill be editing new questions and answers as they come in <3 if you have any more questions just comment them (or ask on anon if you want, I’ll answer both here and there)

Question from: @bobittybob20276

while Aito tries to train like the rest of her classmates (though sparring) his quirk really isn’t a fighting quirk, so yeah, most of her training happens out in the wild. He mostly trains on his classmates and teachers, but will occasionally go out of the school and try to charm random people she bumps into ;) . she continues his training after graduation, and keeps getting better and better the longer she’s in the field.

Question by: @zedthebuggy

kinda a tough question here, lemme try to explain how Aito’s quirk works; so pretty much it’s not really Aito’s gaze that makes it work, like his pupil doesn’t have to be trained on someone. His quirk works through her iris (the yellow bit). it looks normal most of the time, but when being used, it becomes wildly complicated, confusing the eye of her target and scrambling their brain a bit. pretty much, the brain normally simplifies everything so our eyes can kinda take shortcuts and let us quickly take in as much info as possible, but Aito’s irises are so overly complicated that the target’s brain is forced to focus excessively on them to keep up, making them very suggestible. that’s why Aito has to speak his commands, so that the target’s brain confuses Aito‘s voice for it’s own command (and also why the target won’t do anything too complicated or out of character. if the brain thinks too hard about what it’s doing, it could fall out of Aito’s control) his quirk would be better described as a sensory overload, but without the panic or any negative feelings. It actually feels rather nice to be charmed, like being a hot room with a cool fan blowing in your face, or drinking a warm drink in the snow. Very positive, yet opposity feelings at once if that makes sense

(side note, when Aito gets older, she can control when his quirk is “turned on” but while she’s in UA, it just constantly on all of the time, hence his choice in hairstyle)

so! To answer your question, if someone doesn’t know about Aito’s quirk, they have 0 clue that they’re being charmed, and will have 0 memory of whatever they do when charmed. If someone does know about her quirk though, their brain will recognize the feeling and will be able to combat it (she can still be pretty effective, but he still has to work harder for it) if someone knows about the quirk, their vision will get a bit darkend around the corners and may see quick flashes of darkness as their brain kicks off to focus on Aito’s irises. it takes a lot of willpower to fight Aito’s charms- or, just a very very simplified vision, like Aito’s mama has (if someone asks, I’ll talk later about Guadelupe’s vision, it’s actually pretty interesting) (side note again, if someone tires to fight her charm, it could leave them with a gentle headache <3)

and FINALLY Aito’s quirk doesn’t require her to physically see, as long as her target can see her, it works :)

Question by: @gatortopia

Aito decided to become a hero because… he’s perfect! And he wants everyone to know how perfect she is!! And everyone thinks heros are perfect!!! And soon EVERYONE will see how PERFECT he is!!!!!!!

(side notie <3)

when Aito’s father left them, he was cemented in Aito’s brain as someone who couldn’t see how perfect he was. Aito just wants to be seen by her father, but because he doesn’t know who he is, he assumed that the only way to get the man’s attention was to prove how perfect she can really be, and the only way she could figure out how to do that is by becoming a hero.

after he gets her license, he immediately starts heroing like others do, with big fights and capturing villains and saving people… but… that really didn’t work for her. No matter how strong or fast or clever she was, he couldn’t match up to his peers in the heroing world.her quirk just wasn’t made for that kinda work. He took some time off to figure himself out, and after a bit of time (and a lot of conversations with Michi, both professional and personal) he finally figured out that his best place to work was behind the scenes, collecting information and going undercover in villain hangouts and social events. he wears her support hero badge with pride. (and uhhh still sometimes helps with big fights and capturing villains and saving people. Hey! She spent good money on his hero suit! He’s gonna use it!!)

Question by: @ratty-memes

ooohhhh ok! This is the question I really wanna answer!!!

so! to clarify, Aito absolutely thinks he’s all that and a bag of chips, like even in the deep parts of her brain, she thinks he’s The Blueprint. I would almost describe her as narcissistic bordering on psychopathic. THE ONLY REASON I WOULDN’T DESCRIBE HER AS THIS THOUGH- is because of her reasoning

so- Aito was raised by his mama exclusively, and he thinks his mama hung the moon and painted the stars. Like she is a capital M capital B Mama’s Boy. He absolutely adores his mama and thinks she’s absolutely without flaw or defect. (She didn’t instill this in him, Guadelupe’s just a very nice lady and Aito was really messed up after his father left, so she clung to any semblance of a good parent she could find. (Even though he’s technically out of this stage already, and it’s much less pronounced, something similar happened when he met Sato. Guadelupe never dated after Aito’s father “because my mijo is the only person I’ll ever need” and because of that, Sato is the first positive male role model in his life. Most of his acting out actually is a product of wanting to keep Sato’s attention on him, and to subconsciously keep him from leaving like his father did))

Aito’s brain pretty much went “ok, my mama is Absolutely And Positively Perfect… and she really really loves me… she wouldn’t love a kid with flaws… so I must also be perfect!!” And that’s why she thinks she’s all that! She thinks his perfection is as obvious as the sky being blue, and his want for validation just his way of checking out the window and seeing the color or they sky. they sky is blue, and everyone knows that, and Aito is perfect, and everyone should know that!!

Question by: @cosmic-goof

you only get repercussions if you’re caught ;)

but also she’s promised multiple people that she won’t steal from strangers. In the classroom setting, people know that when your wallet or your ID card or your phone go missing, you should talk to Aito before you do anything else, strangers don’t know that, so whatever she takes is for keeps. He really doesn’t like keeping things from people as much as he just likes the act of pick pocketing, so if someone asks for their item back, Aito will immediately return it and will probably explain how and when he took it if they let him. only problem is, you obviously can’t do this with strangers, so instead she does other things, like asks them for a harmless favor that someone would never do for a stranger (“hey there, can you help me move tomorrow?” “Hi! Do you mind if I take your picture?” “Hello sir! can I look through your phone for a sec?”)

Question by: @cosmic-goof

at the moment, it’s usually an adult who knows about her quirk and tries very hard not to be charmed (think sato). she can still charm adults obviously, but it’s a bit harder to do bc she’s just a little baby. maybe when she trains more she’ll get stronger, but at the moment, that’s her limit (sorry if this is a weird answer, willpower doesn’t exactly come in like a points system irl, so I can’t be like “7 willpower!” yk?)

Question by: @glitchviper

I talked about this before with Rin’s blind eye (something I’ll probably add here) but being blind in one eye wouldn’t stop Aito’s quirk (as long as you look at her with your non-blind eye, you can still be charmed, hence why when looking at Aito with only her blind eye, Rin wasn’t charmed)

the only was to not be charmed by Aito is to just not see her eyes, so total blindness or some kind of visual abnormality (like her mama has. somebody PLEASE ask me about Lup’s eyes. I have diagrams) but! if a person is seeing, but can’t hear Aito (be it because of deafness, or some issues in the environment like loud noises or earmuffs) a person can be charmed, but cannot be commanded <3

((p.s. I’ll be talking a lot about blindness or other disabilities while discussing Aito’s quirk, but if I say or display any ableist language or sympathies, please know it’s out of ignorance and not malice, and correct me when you can.))

#Ohhhh please keep asking questions <333 I adore character building for this nasty little leech <3 #Sweet little baby who deserved to be beaten up sooo badly #<3333 #questions about Aito <3 #aito takao #bnha oc comeback #Long post

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blushing-starker · 4 years

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Cold mates and black coffees

For @starkerfestivals prompt of mates

There is, he supposes, something beautiful about a world such as this, primitive yet advanced and sophisticated. Children no taller than his knee carry around super computers that fit in the palm of one's hands, talk to friends thousands of miles away whenever they want. It used to take him months to receive his preferred concoction for the early night wake up call, now stores inhabit every corner of every city. They patiently wait to receive their dependents, all sorts of people relying on some version of the simple black coffee to jolt their system. Convenient, sure, no doubt about that. A quick stop at a Starbucks and violá, five hours of productivity guaranteed. But nothing builds character like swimming laps through a freezing lake infested with piranhas to keep away the urge to rest for just another five minutes. Unfortunately, sleepless days were the norm for him and Rhodey whenever they endeavored to race each other underwater.

There are clothes, too. Clothes for each season available year round. Fox fur adorns a lanky mannequin next to a twin showcasing how breezy summer fabrics can be. Riding boots that he would have spent a small fortune on decades ago shine below man made light for the cost of a nice meal over at Pepper's. Jewels fine enough for the family vault enchant any who take so much as two steps in either direction. Everything is for sale; it just means swiping a plastic card, presenting a number off a super computer or giving the cashier the remains of ancient trees. He could buy an ice cream cone (with sprinkles, of course, he's not an idiot) and immediately wander over to a restaurant selling sizzling curry. It's what his father dreamed about, a thousand years ago. How odd then, that his only heir couldn't be more nonchalant to all this.

It's his what, first month back from sleeping for half a century? He got accustomed to this whirlwind of a consumerist world by the first week. The soft purr of self-driving engines, flashing neon street signs, a melting pot of twenty, thirty languages, glittering clothes clashing with garish makeup, an overwhelming scent of smoke, perfume and money is as familiar as the palm of Rhodey's left hand or Pepper's right. Is it fantastic, being alive for the wild ride that is the twenty-first century? Yes, of course it is. But it's his father's dream; not his. His dream is the same as what drove Maria Stark into the world: finding his mate. Which, logically speaking, won’t happen until time has colored his hair with quite a bit more starlight and streaked thin lines around not too shabby cheekbones. (Rhodey’s teasing words.)

Going along with logic, there is a chance his mate will never show up. It was mere luck his father met the only woman besides Peggy that could stand his whole. Well, that could just stand him, period. A mate is found by scent, identified by touch and only bound with words. If his father had gone for one more drink, he’d probably be as real as the tooth fairy. In the back of his head, there lives a voice. And this voice he named Miss Lucky. She told him how lucky he would need to be in order to find a mate not too close to cradle or grave, a person that saw eye to eye in the majority of the basics and was open to his predilection. Someone that wouldn’t fear or expose him, wouldn’t want to strike the killing blow themselves. And Christ, with or without Miss Lucky, it’s a fool’s idea, thinking that in the middle of New York amidst one of the coldest winters to ever grace the city, his mate, his soul’s match, his other heart will chance upon him and actually accept the fact that he barely exudes a scent. Let alone something useful enough to help others recognize his class.

That’s the one downfall to living in this time; so much tension regarding one’s class. It is infinitely better than before when there were only three possibilities and the social restrictions could very rarely be shattered. But now it’s about pulling rank, percentages listed on a piece of paper could be used against you or signify one’s survival. A double-edged sword. To be a nurse, any applicants must be less than thirty percent alpha. Soldiers were forbidden from entering foreign countries if they had more beta characteristics than not. Lovers, in some parts of the world, could marry exclusively when their percentages were compatible. In the old times, if you smelled like an omega, you were treated as such. That could entail being thrown into a whorehouse or perceived as royalty destined to bring life into the world. Once puberty came, a simple prick and a vial of blood determined one’s next decision regarding the future.

He took the test. Just out of curiosity and it’d be rude not to provide a mate with information so readily accessible merely because of an unjustified fear over his identity. He is an alpha. And if the test had said otherwise, it would have been no problem. Of course not, he would have been proud to identify as a beta or omega. His mother was a beta and his nanny, basically his second mother, was an omega. No shame would’ve clouded his mind at receiving such news. The matter was this, though, he had believed to be an alpha the entirety of his life. If the paperwork said that was his lowest percentage, different rules and procedures, updated to today’s society, would need to be learned.

And he’s so tired of it all when only a handful can smell the fact he’s an alpha. What was he supposed to do, carry the results in his pocket in case a bigot searched for a fight? No, that would be, as Pepper had made very clear before, extremely silly.

He carries the test in case his mate considers such matters important. Or their family. Yes, it’s not because he worries that society will somehow doubt his identity. In the end, being an alpha is an integral part of who he is. It shouldn’t be that way and he barely knows what that means, but it’s true. Miss Lucky comes back around swiftly now, what if his mate isn’t interested in him because of his percentage? What then? Learn what the other classes represent to that person and behave in ways they believe suit said classes? Could his match be with a pureblood, intent on “staying true” to their highest percentage? Would he be able to, cinnamon. Wait, cinnamon and honey? Is that rain and sunlight? Since when does Starbucks incorporate those smells? And how the hell does he know what sunlight smells like? He’s insane. There’s no other explanation, oh that must have hurt.

A young man has just barreled into him. Slammed into his arm like a linebacker. A linebacker that weighs a feather and a half. How is he this light, a breeze had more force. What should he, what’s the proper ritual here, oh my god

“Your nose is bleeding- “

“I’m so sorry, I wasn’t looking. I’m just late for class and- “

“Calm down and let me buy you some coffee; you’re half dead- “

“Shit, your coat. I will pay you back, I swear.”

He hums, looks down and apparently he was too involved in his quest to find a mate that he completely bypassed the thought that this man had accidently crashed into him while holding a coffee…

A mate. He doesn’t know what sunlight smells like. How could he? Unless that’s what his mate smelled like. The young man inhales sharply, lets out a little “oh, I think, I know it’s you.” and, on further reflection, he notices this kid has the voice of an angel. Soft and kind while not being so lilting he’d think it weak and demure. Ah, he looks like an ethereal entity too. Of course he does.

It’s the eyes that do it for him, enchant him enough he wants to kneel and propose right there in the hopes of waking up each night to those amber pools as familiar and mysterious as the universe itself. The rosy lips, pink cheeks and sweeping lashes are also quite nice. He has the body of a being from the old tales, a nymph or a muse destined to bring light and joy to the world. And black coffee to coats older than his father and grandfather combined.

“Could I touch you properly? I think spilling sugar over that coat didn’t really give me the chance to feel my mate, Mister?” Rhodey’s gonna annihilate him. This is a child, twenty-one at most. They could exchange numbers; communicate when his best friend wouldn’t be tempted to take one look and accuse him of going for jailbait. He could make a plan, organize a way to gently explain how he’s an undead creature of the night whose low circulation means that somehow his hormone production slowed and therefore he barely smells like wood let alone an actual human being. They could make it work. If he’s lucky, Angel here won’t fall for another. If he’s lucky, lots of things won’t happen. Or they will anyway.

“Stark. Tony Stark. It’s a pleasure to meet you, all things considered. When I learned one’s mate smells like something unknown, I didn’t quite expect literal sunshine to be what I noticed. And don’t worry about the coat; it’s nothing.”

Marie Antoinette gave him this coat as a gift on his sixteenth birthday a few years before her death. It’s fine.

“Oh. I, I wouldn’t have thought I smelled like that. It’s really nice, actually. You smell, and please don’t take this the wrong way, like alpha. And home. I know it’s weird, but I can’t explain it any other way. I’m sorry if it’s too- “

At least he already knows he dislikes that worried furrow on such a happy face. He surges forward, clasps a soft hand and lets slip a shocked gasp, sees the mirrored reaction because Jesus, it’s as if he licked his finger and then stuck it inside a power outlet. Every hair on his body stands on end and when was the last time his heart beat that fast? Surely it was the night his old flame left or when they, no. No memories of a past lover when his mate is right here, clutching his hand like a lifeline.

“I don’t believe I know your name. Seems a little unfair, don’t you think? Wanna even the odds?” It’s meant to make the young man smile and he does.

It’s only when he grins that Tony notices the sharpened incisors and the slight cold coming from the small figure. The same fog that follows him around even on the hottest of days. The exact shape of teeth Tony cleans in front of his bathroom mirror each night.

“Peter. My name’s Peter. Nice to meet you, Tony.”

#alpha!tony #tony stark #Vampire!Tony #vampire!peter #dark!starker #well #supernatural!starker #a/b/o au!#a/b/o!starker #starkerfestivals #my writing #peter parker

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afaimsarrowverse · 3 years

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Arrowverse-Spin-Offs, we would like to see:

„Arrow“ and „Black Lightning“ are done, „Supergirl“ is in its last season and „The Flash“ and „Legends of Tomorrow“ will probably be over rather sooner than later. So it’s time to look at some potential Spin-Off-Ideas and the reasons why we won’t see any of those happening. But hey, I have been wrong before. The last time I did such a list, I wrote that Warner would never allow a „Superman“-Show to happen, because of them wanting him exclusive for the movies, even though at this point the Powers that Be were already working on getting „Superman & Lois“ on the way (because they have been working on that since around „Elseworlds), so maybe in two years one of those shows on this list will actually air at The CW:

Atoms: Since Ray has left „Legends“ I have been missing him, and since Crisis was the last we ever saw of Ryan Choi, yes, I still want „Atoms“, starring both Ray Palmer and Ryan Choi and their respectice wives, sciencing their way out of every problem and superheroing a little bit at the side. Yes, Fairy Godmother Nora would be a challenge to put into that concept, but if someone really wanted to find a way to integrate that storyline in the show, they could and if not, they could just do away with her powers off-screen. To bad Brandon Routh and Berlanti Productions did not part under the best terms and that the reason they got rid of him in the first place was that they couldn’t afford him any longer, so this one is not likely to ever happen. Also, I am not sure too many people are actually interested in a whole show about the Atom. Even if there a two of them.

Canaries: With „Green Arrow and the Canaries“ not picked up, they could return to this fan-favored concept: A solo show for Laurel and Dinah. Ditch the Future Crap or wrap it up in the Pilot, let them live in the present again and be a crime fighting double act. Or just set in the future, if you must, and let Dinah keep her club and just say good bye to the Queen-Kids. But since both actresses waited for a year to star in a show, that was not happening and said no to jobs because of that and the plotthreats of the „Green Arrow and the Canaries“ Backdoor-Pilot are still up in the air, it is very unlikely that we will get to see this one.

ThunderGrace: They should have aimed for that show instead of „Painkiller“, they might have had better chances to get picked up with it. Anyways, giving Anissa and her new wife Grace their own show, set in a different city of course, would go great with certain protions of the „Black Lightning“-Audience and might even attract new viewers. Having Jennifer and TC guest star regulary would also be great. Sadly this won’t happen of course, „Black Lightning“ already was very much Anissa’s story, giving her her own show would be like continuing „Black Lightning“ just without Jefferson, so it would basically be the same and therefore The CW would not go for it. Also, as long as „Batwoman“ is around, they would not do a second show with a lesbian Superhero Lead, who fights streetlevel, and since Season 2 also not one about a lesbian Superhero Lead, who is black on the top of that. So sadly, not happening.

Guardian and the Sentinel: „Supergirl“ is not getting a Spin-Off, but if we could choose, only Jessica Queller would go for the „Midvale“-One. Having Alex Danvers and Kelly Olsen als crime fighting partners in every sense on our screens would be great. Yes, the title might need some working on, but the concept would be great. They would probably operate outside of National City, there might even be a way to get the military angle in somehow. However as with „TunderGrace“, thanks to „Batwoman“ this one will never get made, because neither Alex nor Kelly have superpowers. Too bad.

Daughters of the Demon: I am very aware that I am the only one, who wants this Spin-Off. But I still want it. A show build around Thea Queen and the Al Ghul-Sisters (and Roy Harper of course) and their dealings with the League of Assassins in all forms and shapes. Katrina Law is of course not available right now, but the main reason we will never see a show around Thea, Nyssa, and Talia is that no one except me is really interested in it.

Dreamer (and Brainiac-5): This one has probably the best chance of ever happening from everything on this list, but given that it wasn‘t done anywhere outside this year’s Pride-Special, means that there probably are no actual plans for it. Anyways, a show about Dreamer with Brainy at her side, probably set in a new city rather than National City, would be great. Nia is still very new to the superhero-game, just finding her feet, and her romance with Brainy can go to many more places. But after the backlash in regards to „Batwoman“, The CW is probably hesitant to dare making a show about a transhero starring an actual transwoman. Nia might rather get moved to „Legends“ or „Superman & Lois“ or get to guest star on „The Flash“ next season than get her own show.

Next Gen: Mia Queen did not get her own show, when she was teamed up with the Canaries. However if you were to team her up with the Tonado-Twins and a Super-Spawn (not the Kent Twins though), she and Dig’s kids might just get another chance for their own show with William as their tech support. However the death of „Green Arrow and the Canaries“ makes that very unlikely, addionally we don’t know what will happen to Nora and Bart on „The Flash“ yet or where they will go with Kara or Clark for that matter in the future. And show set in the future would also cement that future, which would limit all the other shows somehow in storytelling terms, which might have been one of the reasons „Green Arrow and the Canaries“ was not picked up, so don’t hold you breath for that one.

Hall of Justice: Crisis established the League, but in a few months, only Sara, Barry and Clark will be left. But Nate is probably not the only one who applied for a seat. This one would of course have to take place between seasons or star everyone expect the heroes, who currently still have a show. I did name it „Hall of Justice“ on purpose, because there are many reasons, why this would never happen with the other name, but to be blunt, it would probably never happen under any name. However, this would be a good way to actually end the Arrowverse. To do a mini-series, where the League assembles after the last or most of the old shows are done. This could be one last Crossover with the potential of Follow Up- Features, if someone would ever want to make more of it.

An Anthology-Show:

Originally „Legends of Tomorrow“ was supposed to be an Anthology-Show, and while the decision to make an acutal show instead was the right one back then, the Arrowverse has grown since then, and the idea to do an Anthology-Show to keep it alive is actually a No-Brainer. Instead of whole Seasons, it would be better to go for Two-Parters, Three-Parters, Four Parters and even One Offs though, in order to get more stuff done in the span of a season. The main reason this will not happen is money of course - without standing sets this one would be hard to pull off, but I think it is necessary at this point. And they could even do only two arcs per season or only a hand full of episodes. This is where they could wrap up the open stortythreads from the failed Backdoor-Pilots – „Green Arrow and the Canaries“ and „Painkiller“ –and also where they could test out new Spin-Off Ideas, they could do my entire list here, plus more, like Slade and his sons, a story about the Hawk s, one about Kate Kane, or even Brandon Routh’s version of Superman etc. They could even go back and do in-between episodes about forgotten and dropped storylines, to which they never got around, like Roy’s death and resurrection or Rip’s founding of the Time Bureau. Additionally this is where they could do the Annual Crossover, they would not need to sacrifice episodes of the other shows, but instead air the Crossover as the Mid-Season Replacement in its own show, followed by some other storylines. But like I said, money is not on the side of this one.

Bonus: Show that will air on HBOmax instead and therefore can’t happen for the Arrowverse:

John Diggle, Space Cop:

This would be the Arrowverse Version of „Green Lantern“ and with a „Green Lantern“ Show heading to HBOmax it will of course never happen.

Hellblazer:

Not too long ago this was my top-bet for a new Arrowverse-Spin-Off, given that Matt Ryan’s „Constantine“ left a lot of unresolved storylines behind, but now that a new version of „Constantine“ with a younger John Constantine as the Main Protagonist in it, is heading to HBOmax, Matt Ryan’s version of the character may even be scrapped from the Arrowverse for good in the soon future. Let’s hope there is room for both versions of the character, but a Spin-Off for the Arrowverse is very much not happening any more.

Booster Gold (and Blue Beetle):

Wait, you might say, since when is Booster Gold getting his own series on HBOmax? Well, he was at least planned to get one. Alongside „Green Lantern“ another show was announced back then, remember?„Strange Adventures“ was supposed to feature Booster Gold. And while it has become kind of quite around this project, it was not officially scrapped. Given that it is very unlikely that we will ever get to see an Arrowverse-Version of Booster Gold instead, much less in his own show, and with „Blue Beetle“ getting his own show on HBOmax as well, Ted Kord will probably also never pop up in the Arrowverse, and Michael and Ted will never team up alonside the Legends. Too bad.

#Arrowverse #Potential Spin-Offs #Stuff we wanna see #Arrow #The Flash #Supergirl #Legends of Tomorrow #Black Lightning #Batwoman #Superman & Lois

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ncisladaily · 3 years

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Renée Felice Smith was only six years old when she knew that she wanted to be an actress and storyteller, but people tried to dissuade her from her chosen career path, telling her it was an impossible goal. Luckily, Smith’s parents weren’t among the naysayers, and today she’s living her dream, starring as Intelligence Analyst Nell Jones on NCIS: Los Angeles (Sundays, 9 p.m., CBS) and co-authoring her first children’s book Hugo and the Impossible Thing with her creative partner Chris Gabriel.

So, when her French Bulldog Hugo was diagnosed with a brain tumor, Smith once again ignored the doubters and found the best vet possible to give Hugo a shot at life rather than listen to those who told her it was “just truly impossible.”

“We just knew we had to try for our little guy, and we’re so glad we did because he was with us for another two beautiful years, just grinning, growling and running around the yard like the wild man that he always was,” Smith tells Parade.com in this exclusive interview. “So, we’re so glad we fought for him and advocated for him.”

When Hugo finally passed, Smith and Gabriel knew they had to tell his story to inspire others to conquer the seemingly impossible things in their life. So they wrote a story about a little dog named Hugo, who succeeded where others didn’t even try as a result of his bravery, curiosity, teamwork and persistence.

“The love is still here, and it needed someplace to go, so now we have the book and Hugo’s message that now we get to share with the world, which I’m just so grateful that it’s become real,” Smith adds.

Related: NCIS: Los Angeles‘ Daniela Ruah Speculates About Whether Kensi and Deeks Will Survive the Obstacles Ahead

This Sunday night, Smith will be back with some teamwork of her own when NCIS: Los Angeles returns with a new episode dealing with technology, which is something that Nell excels at. In the “Imposter Syndrome” episode, NCIS obtains a hard drive containing a realistic deep fake video of a deceased terrorist and must retrieve the dangerous technology behind it. However, when the team’s comms are hijacked during their mission, they find that one of their own has been a victim of its potential.

And, spoiler alert, Smith says that in the May 23 Season 12 finale, Nell will finally be reunited with Hetty (Linda Hunt)! But how that will play out remains to be seen.

“Linda was essentially sidelined by the pandemic, but, very exciting, I do share a scene with her in our season finale and it’s one of the most memorable scenes of my time on NCIS: LA, so I’m very grateful to have her back as my scene partner,” Smith says.

For more of what Smith had to say about her real-life Hugo and Hugo and the Impossible Thing, as well as more NCIS: Los Angeles scoop, read on.

With your background, a movie seems a more natural project than a book about Hugo. How did it turn into a book?

Chris, my other half, and I are lovers of all types of books. We grew up with children’s books and some of the most impactful stories and lessons we feel that we’ve learned in our lives we learned in the pages of those books, so we really wanted to create this modern classic, a book that kids, or quite frankly, anyone nowadays could really benefit from.

Especially right now, we’re all dealing with our own version of the impossible thing, and we’re trying to find our way to the other side. What better way to inspire you and yours to go out and conquer whatever your impossible thing is than through a storybook following this spirited French Bulldog through the forest, kind of this yellow brick road, Wizard of Oz structure? He meets up with his forest friends and they end up helping him through the impossible thing. It’s really a story about bravery, curiosity, teamwork and persistence. We wanted to encourage that in our readers, both young and young at heart.

Tell us about Hugo and his battle with his brain tumor.

Hugo was diagnosed with a brain tumor and we were truly beside ourselves. It was an out-of-body experience. He was a feisty, curious, wild man who was quite literally sidelined by this potentially terminal disease, and we just knew that we didn’t want to give up on him, and he wasn’t giving up on himself. Every step of the way, we would say out loud, “Hugo, just let us know, buddy, do you want to keep going?” And he met us with this enthusiasm for the process every step of the way. And that is truly why we kept going.

Did Hugo instill in you the belief that the impossible might be possible? Or did you already have that?

That’s interesting. I think the process really showed us that if you ask the questions, oftentimes the people who ask the questions are the people who find the answers, and this process really reiterated that. He inspired us to advocate for him, because animals are helpless on their own, but we could do something about it. We could ask the questions; we could be his voice. I’m just so thankful that he was always this bright light that had this insatiable curiosity for life. He definitely imbued that in me, and I know he imbued that in Chris. He did inspire us to help him conquer his impossible thing. If he didn’t have the fight in him, if he wasn’t such a spirited dog, I don’t know if that would’ve happened, but he was singular in a way. I reference him as my canine son, because he was. He was my baby.

On NCIS: Los Angeles, Nell is torn these days. She feels Hetty tricked her into taking the job when she said she didn’t want it, but she has the support of her team and also Kilbride. So how do you think she’s feeling these days?

She really is at a crossroads in her life. I think a lot of young women find themselves at this point, where they are very good at their job, but is it the job that they always saw themselves in? Is it the job they saw their future selves thriving in? I think for Nell, she’s really questioning whether she wants this to be her story, and in the process, she’s really finding her voice this season. There’s a scene with Sam Hanna, LL Cool J‘s character, that recently aired, where she spells out her frustrations in her position as de facto operations manager and how she’s struggling to keep the plates spinning. And she tells him that he needs to get on her team. It was a really stern moment for Nell.

I don’t think we’ve really ever seen that. Actually, LL Cool J and I were talking about what a different flavor this scene is bringing to the show because Nell usually is quick with a quip, but she doesn’t often drop the hammer in this way. And this season, we really do get to see Nell drop this hammer, stand in her power, and let people know that she needs help and she’s questioning this process.

I think that’s the side of being the operations manager that we didn’t really get to see very much with Hetty because she had everything under control. So, it’s kind of fun and new to see the person, who may be greener in the position, find her way in this new position of leadership.

How much has COVID affected what we’re seeing this season? Is that why we don’t see more of Linda Hunt, to keep her safe? And I noticed there are fewer people in scenes, especially in ops.

You’re absolutely right. Our show did an incredible job managing the crisis that was the pandemic and continues to be the pandemic. We are tested five days a week. Our crew was incredible in keeping everyone safe. The was goal to keep everyone safe, and we were, in turn, able to create 18 episodes of television, which is incredible.

You were just picked up for your 13th season, so it isn’t over yet, but when you look back, what will you take away from it?

Oh, my goodness. We’re a family, you know, but it’s been a mini-film school for me as well. My time at NCIS: LA has been educational. I just pinch myself how lucky I am that I was able to quite frankly lock onto a job like this for so long. In our industry, stability as an actor is not something you often experience. So, to have this group of people who I’ve grown to love and really consider extensions of my family, I’m just so grateful for the time. I feel like I’ve been a student. I feel like I went to school all over again for 10 years.

With Linda being this master in her craft, I can’t even quantify what I learned from her and most of it happens when we’re waiting to do our scene. It’s in those moments that I hear the stories from her childhood and the stories from early in her career, just these nuggets of wisdom that I have now in my little carpet bag.

From your work outside NCIS: LA, it seems as if maybe long-term, you’re more interested in being behind the camera and writing, producing, directing.

It’s interesting, often as actors, we’re part of someone else’s story, we’re carrying out someone else’s vision, but I’ve always been a storyteller. As a kid, I would essentially write my own little plays and perform them in the yard and direct my friends and family, my sister, namely, in those plays. And for as long as I remember, I’ve always wanted to tell stories. So, yeah, that is where I see myself heading in the future.

You’ve said that you knew at age six that this is what you want to do. And you were lucky that your parents supported you.

Oh, 100 percent. I wouldn’t be standing here today if they hadn’t instilled confidence in me and in my creativity. They really created an environment that fostered out-of-the-box thinking, and I’m so grateful for that.

Which takes us full circle back to the impossible just might be possible.

It’s so true. If you’re curious enough and brave enough and you have the support, obviously, of your community, I think that’s the missing piece in a lot of these puzzles. It’s really the support because you can’t get there alone. No one can. The one-woman show does not exist. It’s an ensemble; it’s a production.

#s12 #Renee Felice Smith #Linda Hunt #ncis la #ncisla #NCIS Los Angeles

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loved-lefthaunted · 4 years

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What are your thoughts on all the evermore songs?

oh my god. this is such a hard question for me so brace yourself. it’s taken me nearly 2 months to write this out and i still don’t think i’ve managed to encapsulate all my thoughts.

So, I have very strong feelings about evermore. I immediately loved it three times as much as folklore, for a variety of reasons. I can do a song-by-song breakdown alongside my general thoughts of the album below:

Firstly, I want to preface this by saying that I do not disregard the impact that folklore had on me prior to evermore’s release. I am not oblivious to the fact that folklore likely primed me for the sound that evermore had and that my mind was set up for a similar sounding album so was willing to receive it with more open ears.

That being said, I think that evermore is the superior album. The overall emotional range and sonic variety of the album is wider and more thought out. The different songs provide a more well-rounded listen in my opinion and give me much more emotional investment than folklore. Each individual song feels strong and there are far more songs with single potential than folklore.

So let’s get down to it:

1. Willow - iconic. The big sister that cardigan deserves. The song that I wish the Lover album had been. A song so fully devoted in such a soft and sweeet way without feeling sickly. A mature way to dedicate a song to the person that you can’t live without but in a way that doesn’t throw pink confetti at your face and tell single people to fuck off. TAKE MY HAND? OKAY TAYLOR. WRECK MY PLANS? FOR SURE BABES. THAT’S MY MAN? 100% FEEL U GAL.

2. Champagne Problems - LOOK. I AM CLAIMING THE NAME SAMPAGNE PROBLEMS FOR ALL FUTURE CONTENT. I want to be proposed to just so that I can reject them and then get wildly drunk on overpriced alcohol. It’s heartwrenching in a way that Taylor hasn’t been since the likes of Treacherous. It doesn’t throw sadness at you, overwhelm you with tears. It hides heartbreak within a soft piano riff and gorgeous imagery.

3. Gold Rush - a sapphic daydream. i cannot believe this is real. The return of a heart-thumping drumbeat and the most lovely, pure song that just describes the infatuation with someone beautiful and how you can wonder about them and be so happy about them and jealous of them all at once.

4. ‘Tis The Damn Season - this christmas song makes me wish i had a boy next door in my hometown that i could randomly sleep with. why don’t i have a fluffy hallmark holiday film based upon this premise? why isn’t there a christmas music video to show me how their interactions work during the holidays and how it differs so vastly with their normal lives? Why can i feel both the distance and the closeness that these two people feel? the cutest dedication to a very un-cute casual relationship. a bittersweet shout out to the people who make us happy for a few fleeting moments spread out over the long haul.

5. Tolerate It - i have very VERY strong feelings about this one. it feels like it both encapsulates romantic and non-romantic love so perfectly. It pairs perfectly with the likes of Closure (more on that later). We all deserve to be celebrated. In a world of people settling for less than they deserve, we should reach for those who deserve us. We are worth it. Find someone who will show us how worthy we are. It’s aching and slow and painful and just....everything. Just because someone has always been there doesn’t mean they deserve to continue to be there. Tolerating you is not the same as deserving your loyalty.

6. No Body, No Crime (feat. HIAM) - IT TOOK 14 YEARS BUT TAYLOR FINALLY MURDERED A MAN IN COLD BLOOD AND I AM HERE FOR IT. MEN ARE TRASH, LADIES. REMEMBER THIS. ENGRAVE IT INTO YOUR TOMBSTONES. TATTOO IT ON YOUR FOREHEADS. MEN AS AN ENTITY DO NOT DESERVE US. MURDER THEM. A YEEHAW DREAM. (I have no strong feelings about HIAM but the existence of Este’s name is a blessing in itself, their backing vocals are a lovely addition and a true testament to their friendship as we know how protective Taylor is about mixing business and friendship through collaborations)

7. Happiness - this song is HURTFUL. a song about growth, a song about finding yourself amidst the loss of a partner, a friend, a family member. a loss so deep that it will hurt you for years to come and take a piece of you away forever. but a loss that you have to be resigned to and grow from and let go of. the slow build of the backing is something i haven’t heard since Holy Ground. Both songs talk about loss and moving on in such starkly different ways but still encompass the feeling of reminiscing on something good and pure and perfect whilst battling the knowledge that it’s over and trying to be happy for the person now that they’re gone.

8. Dorothea - the sweetest girl in the neighbourhood. a childhood friend that we all miss having. a person we watched grow into something massive and successful and we’re so genuinely happy for them. the song encompasses the feeling of a distanced joy. a joy that has nothing to do with you, everything to do with this person that you’d be happy to accept again with open arms but will be equally as happy to watch succeed from a distance. a bouncy backing track and lovely vocalisations that really build a sense of a warm hug and the feeling of soft morning sun on your skin.

9. Coney Island (feat. The National) - alright. so i’m sat on a bench in the cold, wrapped up in a winter coat and a hat and gloves and a massive scarf that covers half of my face. i can see the air when i breathe out. there’s an empty ferris wheel at a deserted fairground and i can remember when it was alive and bustling and when i was surrounded by all of the people closest to me on a late summer’s day. and i miss them. i yearn for that to be back. the way we yearn for a time before covid, before masks and elbow touches and sanitising everything. a time when you could sit around a table with your friends and welcome someone with a hug and visit your family for the holidays. a time of joy that was so overlooked until it was gone. The presence of The National is also a breathtaking addition and truly deserved after Aaron’s input on both folklore and evermore. I’m glad they saved it for this song.

10. Ivy - this song just radiates GREEN. Am I in a forest? Am I just in a greenhouse, watering the plants? The guitar/banjo sounds make me so horrifically nostalgic for Speak Now era. The male backing vocals remind me that Taylor has evolved so far from the girl we used to exclusively listen in conjunction with Caitlin Bird and Liz Huett.

11. Cowboy Like Me - one of the only songs I don’t really care about? it’s not bad, it’s just not great. it’s yeehaw without the accompanying passion. It’s the end of a sad, sad wild west movie. It’s a backing track in a scene of a TV show when someone is going on a journey alone to find themselves. But it’s nothing special.

12. Long Story Short - DO NOT FUCKING TOUCH ME. THE BEST SONG ON THIS ALBUM IN MY OPINION. THE STRONGEST BEAT, THE NOSTALGIA OF 1989, THE LYRICS OF RED, THE FUCKS GIVEN OF REPUTATION. THE PERFECT IMMERSIVE TAYLOR EXPERIENCE. TRULY A 10/10 ENTITY. I WILL HAVE THIS PLAYING AT MY GRADUATION. I SURVIVED.

13. Marjorie - the loss of a grandparent is always a lot. i’ve lost 2 due to Covid and it’s cut me deeper than I ever imagined. Marjorie is the 50′s sepia toned daydream that sends you flying back to being a child and being taught life’s most important lessons when you were far too young to understand them from someone so much wiser than you. It feels like I’m being taught to live again. Another build up backing track, but in such an uplifting way? A way that makes you think of the sun slowly coming out of the clouds. Of the end of a rainstorm and the start of a new day. Optimism and innocence. Peace and hope.

14. Closure - right, the return of sadness. The use of the clatter and discord in the background. The death of a Big Machine (subtle and perfectly done). She’s doing better. We all are. It reminds me of the friends I’ve lost and crave to have back but know I’m better off without. We have to let go of this. Close the chapter. You don’t even need the epilogue, it’s over. The production makes me so uncomfortable and it’s SO NECESSARY because lack of closure is UNSETTLING. It’s horrifying. It’s devastating. But the lyrics and the power of the song show how strong you can be and how important it is to push through the discomfort and continue to live.

15. Evermore (feat. Bon Iver) - the titular song. The return of Bon Iver’s vocals and the lone piano background are truly something to be commemorated for years to come. Although it lacks the painstaking hurt of Exile, this is one of her most simple pieces of artistry on this album and it’s BEAUTIFUL. Something that feels bare and raw. A song that cuts deep and shows us the true core of what she’s currently feeling right now: that although pain might feel forever, it’s not. all pain, much like joy, is fleeting and we have to feel it but we need to remember that it’s only a piece of our experience and place it into context. The song veers on self-pity and wallowing in hopelessness until the latter third, where suddenly hope rises out of the ashes alongside a slightly padded out production from Bon Iver’s vocals. A strong end to the album. This song sets us up for future albums on a note of optimism. It’s a new dawn.

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one-shot-plus-size · 4 years

Text

Home part 1

Something that came to mind when I was watching The Punisher series.

Pov Olivia

I stared at the screen with many faces on it. I loved my job, but what I hated most about it was the meetings. They were always pointless to me. But if they required me to be there, I showed up without discussion.

- Only two more hours - whispered my supervisor sitting next to me.

I looked at him and rolled my eyes. Martinez knew very well how much I disliked meetings. My work was lying at that moment and no one was taking care of it. I took a breath and looked out the window and saw a hooded figure passing by. How much I would give to get away from here, I focused my eyes on the presentation, wanting at least for a moment to be occupied with something. A knock on the door pulled me out of my reverie and I looked at the person who entered the room.

- Sorry to disturb you, but there is a man at the reception desk. - The secretary took a breath.

- And what about it? - The desk clerk spoke up.

- He's asking to see Olivia. She doesn't look well. - She's upset.

- May I? - I said.

- Ten minutes and you're back - the supervisor nodded.

I nodded and left the room, marching after the secretary. When we got down from the first floor I saw a broad back dressed in a hooded sweatshirt. The figure turned to me and that's when I realized who it was.

- Frank - I covered my mouth with my hand.

- Hey - he smiled gently.

- What are you doing here? - I came closer.

He grabbed my arm and pulled me outside.

- I'm sorry to bother you at work - he looked at me.

- You look like shit - I laughed quietly.

- As always nice - he rolled his eyes.

I crossed my arms on my chest and stared at him.

- Need to hide for a while - he looked down at his feet.

I pulled my car and house keys out of my pocket and handed them to him.

- Go to my place, when I come back from work we will talk - I breathed.

- How will you come back if I take away your car? - He squeezed the keys in his hand.

- This is the least of your worries, go. Lock the doors and close the windows, clean yourself up a bit and when I come back we'll talk.

He leaned towards me and kissed me on the cheek, I shook my head and went back to the building. Everyone looked at me strangely when I took my place in the hall.

- Are you okay? - Martinez leaned towards me.

I nodded and looked back at the conference. I hadn't seen Frank for the past year. He disappeared like always as soon as he licked his wounds. I was slowly getting tired of it, I helped him when he needed it but then he just disappeared. As always, it will probably be the same now. Once he's licked his wounds, he'll be gone for who knows how long.

- Miss Olivia seems to be a little out of sorts.

- I am present - I looked at him - You want to introduce a new system to manage the warehouse. You say it will be good for us, but have you considered how long it will take to get everything up and running? How much time will it take for people to learn everything from scratch? Has anyone counted the costs of warehouse downtime? And what will happen with the production?

- As always, you have a lot of questions - he smiled slightly.

- Because I want to know that what we have to implement will be profitable. But clearly this decision is not mine. There are a lot more important people in this room than me. I don't really know what I'm doing here, but here I am. So I am asking questions.

- Very well - he nodded slightly - You are here to ask questions that we would not have thought of. We need a fresh perspective on all this. If you allow me, I will continue.

- Sure - I smiled slightly.

Two hours later.

- Can I work from home for a few days? - I was looking at Martinez.

- Does this have anything to do with the man who asked for you ? - he closed the door behind him.

- He's a long-time friend of mine, he's having life problems and he asked me for help. It'll only take a few days, I promise I'll work as if I were in the company.

- Should I be worried? - He sank into the chair behind his desk.

- Have I ever given you reason to worry? - I leaned against the wall.

- No - he shook his head - I trust you, how many days are we talking about?

- A week or two if you let me. The decision is yours, if you do not agree I will come to work normally. - I shrugged my shoulders.

- I just don't want to hear from anyone that they can't contact you - he smiled and waved his hand - take the rest of the day off.

- Thanks, you are the best - I smiled from ear to ear.

- Don't forget it when I tell you to do something - he laughed.

- I will whine anyway - I closed the door behind me.

I packed my things in the office and went outside the building. Well, I was without a car and it was ten miles from home.

- Do you need a ride? - the window on one of the cars went down.

- You were supposed to go home - I muttered.

- I knew you had no way home, I preferred to wait - he smiled slightly.

- Dżizas Frank, for once you could have listened to me - I got into the passenger seat.

- You know I don't listen to anyone.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head.

- I'm not going to ask what happened or where you were because you won't tell me anyway. I just want to know how long you plan to stay?

- A month or two, I have to wait until a few things calm down.

- Sure - I was looking out the window - Are you hurt a lot?

- Nothing I can't handle, it's more bruises than big wounds.

- Sure - I nodded - when did you last eat a decent meal?

- I don't remember - he shook his head.

- I'll make your favorite macaroni and cheese.

- Oh how I missed it - he groaned.

I laughed under my breath, we finally arrived at my house. The first thing I did after crossing the threshold was drop my heels. These shoes will kill me someday, I groaned as soon as my feet touched the panels.

- Make yourself comfortable and I'll just go change.

- Sure - he muttered.

I threw my bag on the couch and headed upstairs to my bedroom. I could finally shed my work clothes in favor of sweatpants and a loose T-shirt. When I returned to the first floor Frank was sitting on the couch.

- Maybe you could take a shower, there are still some of your clothes in the dresser. I'd rather not remove blood stains from the couch and other furniture.

The man snorted under his breath, but rose from the couch and marched obediently to the bathroom. I turned on the music and set about cooking dinner. I moved around the kitchen to the beat of the music and stopped stirring the pasta in the pot. The thought struck me that I felt calm, for the first time in a while. It was like someone had lifted an unwanted weight off my shoulders, I could guess Frank had something to do with it. I snorted under my breath and went back to cooking.

- Dżizas, that smells good - Frank came into the kitchen.

- Just a moment more and it will be ready - I glanced at him.

- Good to see you - he hugged my back.

- You in one piece too - I turned in his arms.

He kissed my forehead and pulled me tighter to him. I hid my face in his chest and smiled like a fool. It felt good to feel his scent again and his body next to me.

- Oi or dinner will burn - I pushed away from him and turned my front to the stove.

Castle was glued to my back, moving with me.

- You know I feel like I have a shell on my back - I laughed.

- Mhm - he murmured, pressing his face against my neck.

- Is it that bad? - I touched his hand to my waist.

- I did a lot of shit this year - he whispered.

- Here you will rest, recuperate - I patted his hand.

- I know - he kissed my neck and pulled away from my back.

After eating dinner, we ended up on the couch. Frank laid his head in my lap and I ran my hands through his dark hair. I didn't ask about what had happened over the year. When he was ready he would tell me himself or not, I felt him breathing steadily. He fell asleep in my lap, I smiled slightly under my breath. I turned the TV down so he wouldn't wake up, he needed his rest. I stroked the bruises on his face with my fingertips, he must have been through hell again. He turned over so that he was cuddling his face into my stomach, I covered him with the blanket and let him sleep on my lap. I rested my head on my hand and stared at the television playing softly. Finally, I grabbed a book from the coffee table next to the couch and started reading. I didn't even realize when it was getting dark outside the window.

- Sorry - his voice was full of sleep - I fell asleep.

- You need to rest - I smiled slightly - and if you think that my knees are good for this, it's cool.

- They are comfortable - he patted me on them and got up.

- Go to my bedroom to sleep, I will lie down on the couch in the study. I have to get up for work in the morning anyway and you need to rest - I looked at him.

- Thanks - he nodded - thanks for everything, you are the only person who will welcome me with open arms no matter how messed up I appear.

- I think you have more people like that around you who would help you - I patted him on the knee.

- You're the only one - he kissed me on the forehead and headed for my bedroom.

I stared after him, his broad shoulders and athletic figure attracted the eyes of women. I snorted under my breath, but he had never been with any other since his wife died. And probably even if I wanted to nothing would happen between us. I slipped my hoodie on, grabbed a bottle of wine and went out onto the terrace. I sat on a hammock in the garden in total darkness and stared at the stars, sipping my wine from time to time. I put my hand under my head and rocked gently. So many thoughts went through my head, so many feelings swirled inside. Sometimes I let my imagination run wild and let myself imagine what it would be like to have Frank exclusively. What it would be like to wake up in bed with him or to hear him say I love you. I snorted under my breath and stretched out on the hammock imagining all sorts of things.

#frank castle #the punisher #punisher #jon bernthal imagine #frank castle imagine #the punisher imagines

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stony-spn · 4 years

Text

House Tour

(Established relationship, married au, avengers as family, soft/fluff, Tony is a mother hen, words 2304)

This isn't something new for Tony, he always liked showing off to the world that he was more than just exploding things. So when Architectural Digest asked Pepper to do an episode on the Avengers Tower to say Tony was excited was an understatement. This was his baby that he made from the ground up, every floor in the tower was made especially for his weird little family that he is very happy to spoil now and then.

“Steve, did you clean your side of the closet?” Tony yelled from the main kitchen when we heard the footsteps approach him.

“Umm…yes… maybe…..kinda. I just got a call from Maria she needs me on this mission right now. I’ll be back first thing tomorrow morning.” Steve replied with his arms folded to his chest, trying to look guilty for not being able to help but Tony could see that the bustard was more than happy to leave all of this on Tony’s shoulders.

“Oh is that so, okay but do make sure you don’t tire yourself too much since you’ll be sleeping on the couch for a week.” Tony couldn’t help but smirk at the small gasp that left Steve’s mouth, well two can play that game.

Tony felt a kiss on his neck that he happily gave more access to, “How about we make it three days?” Steve said while sucking on Tony’s earlobe and making him moan and ache for more.

“I’ll make it for two weeks if you try to bargain with me on this,” Tony said while turning in his husband’s hands to get a proper kiss.

“Well gotta make the most of it, for now, I guess,” Steve replied and started kissing his husband deeply.

“OH COME ON NOT IN FRONT OF YOUR KIDS!!” Clint yelled as soon as he saw his leaders making out in the kitchen.

“Yes daddy hard, uh, daddy..” moans started to leave Tony’s lips that only sent more shivers down Steve’s back.

“I WISH SOMEONE KILLS ME. THOR PLEASE SMASH ME BUDDY, THOR!!” Clint cried.

“I do have to leave, my love,” Steve said in between the sweet little kisses that he left on Tony’s mouth.

“You have to be back before AD comes tomorrow Steve or else I swear on your ass I will kill you.”

“I’ll try my best your majesty,” Steve replied with a smirk and a bow. That flattery asshole will make Tony’s weak heart explode.

Tony went to their master bedroom to clean it up before AD comes tomorrow because his husband would rather take Fury over-cleaning. Which should be concerning.

After a long day of cleaning Tony makes his way to the main kitchen again to feed his “so-called” kids who would live on fast food and take-outs if it wasn’t for Tony and Natasha making them home cook food. Tony loved cooking, it was the only thing we had left of his mother, Jarvis, and Ana. He still has all their recipe books even tho he has perfected and learned each recipe by heart. You know what they say if you want to win someone’s heart the stomach is the way, and when your husband is a super soldier, stomach is most definitely the way. So he started off cooking to impress Steve on their dates which soon held to a habit of always worrying if his super soldier is eating enough. Hence left to him making food for his family. So this was an enjoyable time. He was in charge of it. He gets to make everyone do the dishes or put the table on because hey if he is cooking he isn’t cleaning as well.

“What is our dear mother bear making today?” Bruce asked as soon as he saw Tony cutting meat.

“Brucie bear if you call me the mother of this relationship just because I cook, I am telling Nat.” Tony replied while hitting Bruce’s hand with the back of the knife to keep him from putting his finger in the pot, “And no putting your dirty hands in mama’s pot”.

“Oh no! We call you mama because you my friend have a serious mother hen problems that we all love and adore of course.” Bruce smartly covered his tracks.

“Well to answer your previous question I am making seekh kabab karahi, it’s a Pakistani dish. Thor wanted something spicy and you know Clint he is a spice whore.” Tony stating like this was the most obvious fact in the world.

“So no special treat for me and Nat. And we all know you are making this for Steve, he is the real “spice whore” in this family” Bruce replied as he started mixing the pot so the gravy doesn’t stick and burn. Bruce likes helping Tony not only in the lab but in the kitchen too. Guess they aren’t only science bros.

“Steve was called on a mission this morning. Don’t know where or don’t know who. He just told me he’ll be back in the morning.” Tony said as he took over the pot and pointed at Bruce to start cutting the salad.

“Don’t worry he’ll be fine shellhead.” Nat (who no one knows when came in the kitchen) patted Tony’s back and gave him a half hug.

Tony knew it was ridiculous and that Steve could take care of anything. But ever since Tony put Iron Man on retirement he can’t help but not worry since now he never knows anything about anything. But his family is always there for him to help him not worry himself too sick. He was grateful for them.

“Miss. Nat, I believe it’s your turn to set the table” Tony replied rather too quickly to avoid the thickness he feels is coming around his throat.

“Relax mama I am here in peace.” Nat clapped her hands and danced towards the table. It was still a little crazy to see them all so comfortable with each other.

“I SMELL YOUR FOOD FROM MY ROOM TONY AND CAME RUNNING DOWN TO EAT WHAT MAMA BEAR HAVE FOR US TODAY” Thor yelled as soon as he entered the dining table that was now set with dishes and food. Everything looked perfect.

“Jarvis where is Clint?”

“Sir, Mr. Barton wants me to tell you that he is not leaving his room unless you apologize to for and I quote “ruining my virgin eyes, I saw my mom and dad making out in the kitchen and MOM WAS MOANING”.”

“Tell Barton to show his ass in 5 minutes or he isn’t getting any food tonight or an upgrade on his gadgets,” Tony said while going to sit on his usual seat which was right next to an empty seat of his husband. Just one day that is all.

“Sir, Mr. Barton is on his way. And Thor he is begging for you to not eat everything before he gets down here”

Tony could hear a smirk behind that faceless voice. When did Jarvis become this great, Tony may never know?

The next day came and the production crew was already in the penthouse setting up their cameras and lights. The rest of the Avengers were in the common floor as this was only for the penthouse, meaning Tony and a Captain was required only for the shoot. But the said “Captain” still wasn’t back was the mission that he promised he will be back first thing in the morning and it was noon and Steve was nowhere to be found.

Tony was getting way to furious at his husband for leaving him at the end moment to do this alone when he promised that this will be something they do together like all the things they do. As Tony was about to plan all the ways he will murder his husband, his phone buzzed indicating that Tony received a text. Of course, it was Steve telling how terribly sorry he was and how will be in the tower in the next 10 mins. Tony didn’t bother replying, he’ll say everything on his mind after the shoot is over thank you very much. He just wants Steve to get here, wash and look presentable for the camera for however long they needed to, and after that Tony can murder his husband in peace and quiet of their house. Tony will happily admit that made him smile.

“Okay, Mr.Stark we are ready. When shall we start?” Jenny, the producer asked politely.

“We’ll start in an hour. My husband is on his way back and we’ll need a few mins to set everything up.” Tony replied excitedly. This is what he wants, to show off their house and his husband.

Steve entered the tower in the next 8 mins and left the elevator in the next 9 mins. Not that Tony was counting he just wanted to make sure he didn’t have to kill his husband twice tonight, see he cares.

It took about 25 mins to get Steve to take a shower and wear the clothes Tony picked out for him. While Steve was getting ready Tony took the black roses that Steve so graciously brought, put them in a vase on his side table. It is a thing they did since they started dating, Steve would bring Tony flowers every time he could go for a run and Tony will place them all over the tower to show off how wrapped up Tony has got Steve, it’s a different level of bursting his ego.

“Okay Jenny, we are ready,” Tony called out for the producer as soon as he saw Steve in the kitchen all dressed up and looking so handsome that it should be illegal.

“Don’t you look beautiful my love?” Steve whispered in Tony’s ear with a small kiss on the skin behind his ear.

Tony just gave an umm in response to show Steve that flattery isn’t going to give him a pass this time. But he couldn’t help the smile that was crawling up his lips that he knew gave away more than he wanted to.

“Now this is where the magic happens,” Tony says to the camera as he opens the double french doors to their master bedroom. Steve's soft laugh can be heard behind him.

“This isn’t the only place where the magic happens.” Steve helpful adds to Tony’s surprise. WHY IS HE SURPRISED. STEVE IS AN ASSHOLE AT TIMES AND HE LOVES THIS ASSHOLE ALL THE TIME.

“Steven Stark-Rogers please keep this kid-friendly.” Tony tried to go with hurt and betrayal in his voice but the laugh gave him away.

Tony started explaining all the different things he got from different designers, The rug, the side tables. the color, the sofa’s, the coffee table and the books.

“Uhh and my true love my vanity. I didn’t want a small dressing table with a small mirror. So Pepper and I went into talks with again the main designers of the whole penthouse Nate and Jeremiah, they gave the idea for a walk-in, not a closet, we’ll talk about that later but I walk in vanity that can fit six superheroes all at once. if you slide the wall on which this gorgeous gold mirror is hanging. Now, this is exclusive. I welcome you all to Tony Stark-Rogers vanity. I have it all arranged with things I use in the morning, at night, special occasions, galas, my jewelry,my hand, my face, wet products, dry ones, masks every mask has its own place, makeup that I use daily, the interview ones, the date nights one. Everything here has it’s place and is stacked ever so nicely that sometimes I just want to cry at the engineering of this.”

Tony went on and on about his vanity and he could feel Steve watching him with a fond smile and that face he makes filled with love and affection wherever he hears Tony talk with so much joy,

“There are a few things that are strong enough to pamper a super-soldier too, whenever he lets me pamper him that is,” Tony says as he walks out of his vanity and gives a kiss on Steve’s cheek.

“Now let me take you to another heaven on this very floor,” Tony says all dramatically making Steve double with laughter he really loves this man to death.

“Feast your eyes on the collection I like to call TONY STARK-ROGERS ft Steve Stark-Rogers,” Tony says as he opens yet another double french door. What can he say Tony like drama and dramatic entrance is the.

The closet was huge filled with clothes, sunglasses, bags, shoes, had a whole coffee table with armchairs, refrigerator, and mirrors.

“This part belongs to Steve” Tony pointed the not too small but very small compared to the rest of the room part, “AND ALL OF THIS BELONGS TO ME,” Tony said we a big grin on his face.

After the long tour of the closet, the went back into the room to close o the interview.

“Steve do you have anything to add on our house tour, anything about how amazing job I did with our room and house,” Tony asked Steve as he made home and fixed himself beside Steve under his arms. Tony being only 5′8 and Steve 6′2 he barely reached his husband's shoulder which was okay because they fit like a puzzle and Tony could wear sexy heels and torture his husband,

“Hey, it’s your room I just get to sleep in there if I behave enough. And you did a wonderful job as always with everything you do my love,” Steve said and he leans down to kiss his husband sweetly.

The day the interview was posted. Everyone went crazy at how cute the power couple are actually, about how amazing Tony’s interior designing is and of course #MomTony was treading everywhere.

#stevetony #stony #my writing #stony fanfiction #stony fic #steve/tony #fanfic #superhusbands #superhusbands edits #stony-spn #steve rogers x tony stark

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