#facebook purity

[ashleyfableblack]

Posting the following gif caught me a seven-day ban on facebook for "violating community standards on sexual content".

I wish I was kidding. 😂😁😂😁😂

All credit to the OG for this absolutely adorable- and apparently, intensely sexual, piece of animation. 💜💙💚💛💗

[murkycran]

Lololol guys guys guys my mom sent me a cat video on Facebook and you’ll never guess what one of the ‘suggested’ videos under it was

PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN AT ALL COSTS!!!

Yknow… from the 18+ rated R show that children shouldn’t be watching anyway… lmao

[wandering-wolf23]

I will say that I think ethical breeding as veered from "we should produce healthy, sound, stable animals from parents who are healthy, sound, and stable" to "anything not a purebred is inherently unethical and should not exist". I'm not sure how much of it is online virtue signaling, but enough of it is to make me roll my eyes.

Come on, y'all. I'm sure my health testing working mix is sooo much more unethical than your byb purebred Frenchie.

[dwuerch-blog]

A Wonder-Filled Life

In 1921, the Taggert Baking Company of Indianapolis was about to launch its 1.5 pound loaf of bread. Elmer Cline was charged with finding a name for the new bread. Inspiration struck while he was visiting the International Balloon Race at the Indianapolis Speedway. He was awestruck by a sky filled with hundreds of colorful balloons. To Elmer, the image signified a sense of “wonder,” and Wonder®…

[xenosagaepisodeone]

'militarized state-backed necrophile goon squad' sounds like something out of warhammer 40k but I suppose it's what any nation obsessed with bloodlines and racial purity would exert resources on if provided with the funding. I dont think the warhammer guys would make a sad animated facebook sharebait video about it though.

[lakemojave]

Look, I think most people outside of the Joe Rogan electorate aren’t happy that Musk has wrested control of Twitter. It is generally discouraging to consider how so many prominent social media companies now possess a distinct MAGA verve; Ben Shapiro operates one of the most popular pages on Facebook, YouTube has long played host to a variety of xenophobic content creators, and we have plenty of evidence about how platformed hate can ruin the lives of ordinary people. Elon Musk might not be a full-blooded MAGA creation, but he is representative of a certain type of grumpy, increasingly reactionary Silicon Valley curmudgeon, and if he wants, he can now serve as judge, jury, and executioner of everything that passes through the Trending page. That said, I do encourage my fellow concerned citizens to consider the implications of what they’re saying, as they eagerly sign up for an apocalyptic culture war for the purity of Twitter. Yes, you could flex your insubordination by (I guess?) continuing to tweet, indefinitely, in the exact same way we have been for the previous decade. Or you could recognize a much more sensible truth. Twitter is fundamentally transient and low-value. You can leave the platform, at any time, with your life completely unafflicted. There is no bravery in sticking around; that persistence won’t add anything in the aggregate. In fact, most people wouldn’t even notice you were gone.

[rosyronkey]

hi! i wrote an essay about rosy ronkey and her clothes, and i hypothesized what time period i think shes from/inspired by ^^ below if you wanna read more :))

ive been fixated (or had a special interest or whatever you want to call it) on rosy ronkey for a YEAR today. i've always been pretty interested in her outfit from an aesthetically pleasing point of view, but recently i wanted to see if i could find any trends and time periods in the inspirations of her clothes, which is what this essay is about! it’s going to be an explanation of most of her clothes, top to bottom, from what i can assume with the research i've done. i say research, but i probably don’t have the best sources? they’ll be linked below, but it was really more cross-referencing than anything else lol

i reached out to annie montgomerie for comment/criticism, but she’s obviously very busy and i enjoyed my research from a subjective point of view :)

basic specs on rosy (no one else but me cares): looking at rosy, the only zoomorphic, or animal looking, aspect of hers is her head. judging by proportions and cross-referencing, she looks to have the body of an american girl doll. this is just what i’ve noticed, but annie’s most recent stuff is way less anthropomorphized compared to rosy and the group she was made with. looking at annie’s most recent exhibit, hand me downs, every single piece is completely animal, with hand-sculpted claws, paws, wings and hooves. some of these dolls legs still look like american girl doll legs, but most everything else is animalistic. this isn’t important, but i just thought id mention it because artists’ growth over time is cool!

starting with her coat, it looks like a double-breasted red childrens’ coat with two rows of two buttons each. these kinds of coats are still available today, but i could find the closest matches by looking at 1920s childrens’ coats, specifically rothschild coats. the rothschild family has a long and complicated history, but all that’s important to know is that they are new york based (which doesn’t totally fit my assumptions about her; in general i assume all of annie montgomerie’s dolls are british because of her nationality) and they’ve been in business for over 100 years. by cross-referencing the growing style of double-breasted coats in the 1920s, and the style of rothschild childrens’ coats in ads from the time, i feel like it’s easy to assume rosy's character has this coat, or at least was very heavily inspired by it.

a theory i’ve seen before is that the ticket on her coat is a luggage label. these were used during WWII to evacuate british children during the blitz. the history press site says luggage labels listed “name, school and evacuation authority,” and is also where i got most of my information. i want to tentatively deny this theory. i'm pretty sure the ticket is an annie montgomerie staple opposed to a part of rosys' character. she's shown with the tag in the yorkshire sculpture park video, and on gerard way’s website, but she’s missing it in all the photos posted by annie montgomerie herself on facebook and instagram. almost every single annie montgomerie piece on display or for sale has a tag as well. i love this theory, and it’s probably what got me interested in researching her outfit in the first place, but i don’t think i could prove it if i tried.

other than the ticket, she has white roses on the left side of her coat and some smaller twigs? sticks? pinned to her collar. white roses symbolize purity, youthfulness, innocence, and in some contexts, respect for the departed. i couldn’t find any historical photos of children with roses in their outfits, but across the board that was the result i got for their meaning. i can’t discern what she has on her right collar for the life of me, if someone else can figure this out, PLEASE tell me

her dress is pink, with a cinched embroidered waist and a peter pan collar. peter pan collars became popular in the 1920s, and have been a staple of childrens’ dresses since (sources for this one were a few blogs and wikipedia, but also some ads, so i feel pretty confident with it.) some ads for girls’ dresses in the 1920s had the same soft pleats and embroidered waist as seen on rosys’ dress. i don’t think there’s a meaning behind the color, except that it compliments the red coat and her fur.

her stockings are standard, I couldn’t find much special meaning behind them, british children have been wearing stockings forever, and for girls especially, stockings became more popular in the 1920s as dresses got shorter. usually they were sheer and nude, and rosys’ look like the gray kind kids wear today, but i think it’s still period appropriate to an extent. her shoes look like red mary janes for american girl dolls, just more scuffed and dirtied. mary jane shoes themselves have been around for a while (called “bar shoes” originally,) but they got their name in 1904. in one of the first drafts for this, i read the fairy tale “the red shoes” to see if it offered any insight. i thought it’d be fun to relate, but it’s just a popular danish fairy tale, and it was hard for me to entertain the idea for long.

TLDR: i think rosy ronkeys outfit is inspired by british 1920s fashion!

that’s all I have! i apologize if this was underwhelming or overwhelming or whatever, i had no model to base this off of and the only tumblr essays i read are from my friends <3 i hope you enjoyed! i love rosy ronkey!

link to my dumbfuck google doc with all the links and braindump on it :)

[olderthannetfic]

Fandom discourse when it comes to mixed couples is already hallucinating when it's about fictional character, but it only gets worse when it's about actual people and couples.

I've seen it happen with a couple of youtube couples, but I remember full videos being made about this American woman married to a Japanese man. People were literally making commentaries on how she was taking advantage of him, how she was colonizing and infantilizing him, and how she didn't really love him but was only with him because she had a fetish for Asian men.

The American woman doesn't have a history of "preying" on Asian men, nor did she meet her current husband on one of those Facebook groups that appear on 90 Day Fiance that are called "Americans seeking Japanese." She's just an American who moved to Japan and met a guy she liked who liked her back.

It's crazy how these people, that are supposed to be leftist, ALWAYS fall onto blood purity and racial dynamics that wouldn't look nor sound weird in 1930s Germany.

--

[circular-bircular]

I think there genuinely is an enormous problem in online spaces, I think in part due to the whole concept of purity culture, where everything people say and do online is scrutinized — not just in the case of “Is this person a good person,” but “Does this person represent the values we wish to see 24/7.”

Nobody is perfect, dear lord, and this place is not the place to seek perfection regardless. This is tumblr, home of the go nuts, show nuts rule; tumblr, which is as invaded by fandom and was originally meant to be a pseudo Facebook. People who use this place didn’t come here originally to be activists. And if you did, I'm a little concerned, genuinely, for your mental health and how well you're distancing yourself from difficult subjects and giving yourself the time you need to decompress.

And yet, we keep holding people up to this frankly impossible standard of representing a movement, regardless of what their blog content originally was for. Suddenly, every system on tumblr has to represent a certain Ideal for System Rights! They have to have the right views on system accountability, endogenic systems, plurality as an umbrella, littles, dormancy, fusion, functional multiplicity, parts language, the ToSD-

This is fucking ridiculous. A laundry list of topics that people have on their shoulders, along with every other laundry list of things that people need to care about. Fuck you if you're oppressed in any single way, you need to form opinions on every single one of those things, and if any opinion is out of place, then You Are Not A True [IDENTITY].

Somewhere along the way, many of us (I’m including myself here for a reason) managed to either convince ourselves or be convinced that we need to be Correct in some way about how this all works. That’s prideful and haughty at best, but typically moreso just… so detrimental to healing. None of us will be perfect… and so, when those of us who aren’t perfect are imperfect publicly, we are often harassed or attacked — or some of us attack others, for whatever reason it may be. And somehow, someway, we accepted that this is just how it works.

It's okay to discuss those things you disagree with online. It's okay to look at someone's take about, say, system accountability, or plurality, or littles, and reblog with your corrections and even anger! But you must be doing this with acknowledgement that people will be in different places, healing in different ways, and that there is nothing wrong with that. They're their own person!

But moreover, that's a whole ass blog. That's not a reflection of a person as a whole -- hell, it's rarely a reflection of the person at all. It's just a blog that they can put anything on. Have we not all heard the stories of people who've "Completely Changed" online, becoming people who others cannot recognize? People lie on the internet, intentionally or not.

Even me. I try my best to be who I am in real life here, and I share a LOT of myself with you all. You know I'm a teacher, and engaged, and have the most perfectest little cat in the world. But do you know me? I recently just got to visit an online friend in person (It was absolutely fucking incredible and I can't wait to do it again), and the entire time, I felt like I was just so awkward; I really struggled to stay present and talk more, which is something I don't struggle with nearly as much online. Believe it or not, I am not this long-winded in real life.

Maybe that's not lying, but it's not who I am. It's me being fundamentally different online than in real life. You all see me entirely through just the blogs you know me through. Maybe it's circie bircie, maybe you know my D&D blog, maybe you know me through positivitycombopack, or maybe this just shows up randomly on your dashboard. Maybe you don't know me at all.

And that goes for every person you see online. Do you actually know them? Do you know their beliefs? What they stand for? Why they believe those beliefs?

Or are you just seeing a blog?

[tangledbea]

Poking a dead horse here— do you think if Tangled came out today, they would still have gone with the supposed 8 year gap between Rapunzel and Eugene? Or do you think times have changed and they wouldn’t do that now?

THERE WAS NEVER A SUPPOSED EIGHT YEAR AGE GAP!

Eugene does not have a canonical age in the movie at the time that the movie came out. The directors said they interpreted him as being between 22 and 24 after the fact. Just because the internet at large latched onto 26 doesn't mean it was ever remotely true!

But hot button rant over.

No, I think that now they'd be definitive and specific about his age in the movie either during the movie itself or as a question they were prepared to answer on social media.

When Tangled came out, Twitter was only four years old, and people did not yet think they had unfettered access to the minds (and pencils) behind movies. All the questions I asked Nathan Greno, I did on Facebook, and I only felt brave enough to do so because he had liked and responded to Tangled-related posts I made or comments I made on official Disney posts. It wasn't like it was when Encanto came out and Jared Bush was just fielding questions for months and months after, giving people insight into what their behind the scenes thought processes were.

But, not to be old man yells at cloud about this, I think it was better when people didn't think they had unfettered access to the creative minds (and pencils) behind movies. Back in the day, if we didn't have an answer for something, we just made up a headcanon about it, or thought through logically until we came up with an in-depth analysis. And while I still regularly see analyses about things, people try to get the folks who made the thing to back them up and verify (or justify) their headcanons.

I honestly don't think it matters what characters' exact birthdays are. The only reason Eugene's age matters is because Rapunzel is a very specific age, herself, and was isolated from people for her whole life at the time the movie takes place. And even then, numbers aren't particularly important. Eugene doesn't want to date Rapunzel because she's 18. He falls in love with her as a person, and she happens to be 18, and even the epilogue of the movie says it took them years to get married, which means it wasn't a skeevy grooming situation. (Not to mention, it takes place in ye olden days, when age gaps much larger than theirs were a regular thing, and the wealthy and nobility regularly married people they didn't even know for the sake of politics and business.) People put way too much emphasis on modern sensibilities when watching a movie or series that takes place in decidedly not-modern times.

I do not like purity culture.

[theblackfemininesociety]

Welcome back to our vibrant space, where empowerment and elegance meet. The Black Feminine Society is more than just a blog; it’s a sisterhood where black women celebrate their feminine energy, share wisdom, and commit to genuine growth within our community. Today, we're diving into the essentials that every classy girl should have in her wardrobe. These items are not just accessories and garments; they are statements of grace, confidence, and timeless style. So, let’s elevate our wardrobes together with these must-haves:

CLASSY GIRL MUST HAVES:

1. Black Sunnies

A pair of black sunglasses is the ultimate accessory for any classy lady. Not only do they protect your eyes from the sun, but they also add a touch of mystery and sophistication to any outfit. Whether you’re running errands or attending a high-profile event, black sunnies will keep you looking cool and composed.

2. Pearl Choker or Necklaces

Pearls have long been a symbol of elegance and purity. A pearl choker or necklace adds a soft, feminine touch to both casual and formal outfits. If you missed our “Let’s Talk: Pearls” guide, we highly recommend checking it out on the blog for tips on selecting and styling these timeless pieces.

3. Gold or Silver Chunky Small Hoop Earrings

Chunky hoop earrings, whether in gold or silver, are a staple in a classy girl's jewelry box. They're versatile enough to wear with a jeans and tee combo or a chic evening dress. These earrings frame the face beautifully, drawing attention to your radiant smile.

4. Button-Up Cardigans: Long, Cropped, and Vest Ones!

Cardigans are the Swiss Army knife of any wardrobe. A long cardigan can be wrapped around you on a chilly evening, while a cropped one pairs perfectly with high-waisted trousers or skirts. Vest cardigans are great for layering over summer dresses. The key is to have a variety to choose from for any occasion.

5. Dainty Bangles or a Watch

Accessories like dainty bangles or a classy watch can elevate your outfit instantly. They’re subtle yet powerful in adding a touch of glamour to your everyday look. Mix and match bangles for a boho chic vibe, or keep it sleek with a single, elegant watch.

6. Tailored Trousers

The importance of well-fitted trousers cannot be overstated. Tailored trousers not only enhance your silhouette but also make you feel more confident and put-together. Whether it’s for the office or a casual meet-up, a pair of tailored trousers is a versatile piece that can be styled in numerous ways.

7. Black Purse

A black purse is the finishing touch to any outfit. It’s practical, it matches with almost everything, and it exudes class. Whether you prefer a tote for daytime or a sleek clutch for evenings, a black purse is an essential accessory that you’ll reach for time and again.

These seven items are more than just pieces of clothing and accessories; they are a representation of our style, our grace, and our unapologetic presence in every room we enter.

Fashion is a way to express who we are without having to speak. It’s the fun part of your femininity journey, Let’s make every outfit count!

As we embrace these classy must-haves, let’s continue to support each other, share our stories, and strive for true growth in our community. Let’s level up, together. 💎

JOIN us on INSTAGRAM • TWITTER • FACEBOOK

[vintageseawitch]

some leftists, even those who will vote for Kamala Harris while holding their nose, make claims like, "fascism doesn't just go away if you vote against it" & while there are those out there who do feel this way (or at least want to) there are MANY who know that something like Project 2025 doesn't just go away if they lose their chance to implement it nationwide.

a leftist responded to one of my comments on facebook when i mentioned something about "accelerationists." it was only part of my comment & not even my point. they were SO offended by me calling "all of them that" when i did no such thing. what i see is that leftists who claim they're above everyone because they don't fall for propaganda that easily are proving they are just as human as the rest of us & only read what they want to read.

i get it: the US has A LOT of issues. this is not a great country. there are so many things i want to see get changed for the better. there are plenty of folks who feel the same while not identifying themselves as far left.

one other issue i have: i mention Ernst Thälmann quite a bit in my political posts. he was a German politician & leader of the Communist Party of Germany. he regarded the Social Democratic Party as "social fascists" which made it harder for the two leftist parties to work together. when he ran for office again in 1933 he lost by a landslide & Hitler took office. Thälmann was arrested by the Gestapo & sent to Buchenwald. his party rival, Walter Ulbricht, ignored requests to plead for his release & Thälmann was eventually shot & killed on Hitler's personal command.

when i brought up Thälmann recently, someone commented, "yeah, don't be like the guy who wanted to beat fascism but vote them in instead." that is NOT what i meant & these folks who claim they're the smartest ever because they don't like the US (that's actually a low bar; plenty if people dislike it) like to pretend they don't see my point. my only point is this: we are stronger together regardless of your normal party affiliation. working apart? making purity politics your hill to die on? it won't help us & we probably won't like how that'll turn out.

leftists who don't see the forest for the trees: you're right, you can't just "vote fascism away." the issue is your wanting to be superior to the rest of us is you may be part of what helps them get that kind of power. you're not the MAIN problem; our justice system is garbage & there's decades of poor education & people have been falling for propaganda & people are voting for anyone who is as hateful & ignorant as they are. my point in saying to not be an Ernst Thälmann is: don't tear us apart because of even slightly different ideologies. we need to work together. start at the local level. please remember it's not just the president; Congress & the Supreme Court are also filled to the brim with corruption.

[marxism-lenninism-schwabism]

Worm characters by most-visisted website

Armsmaster: reddit

Aisha: instagram

Regent: 4chan

Taylor: wikipedia

Tattletale: twitter

Rachel: Doesn’t know what an internet is

Brian: irs.gov

Noelle: twitch?

Clockblocker: reddit

Purity: mumsnet

Carol Dallon: Facebook

uh.......... bonesaw neopets? Yeah i'm kind of out of ideas here

[mywitchcultblr]

NSFW and the importance of AO3

My biggest concern if Twitter really die is nsfw artist and sex workers. Us NSFW artist has been betrayed time and time again by many platform who used to welcome us then spit us out once the platform is big enough or to bow down to advertisers.

TikTok censorship is beyond ridiculous

Pinterest wouldn't even allow topless art of a woman

Instagram too not that friendly to nsfw artist

Tumblr banned porn post 2018 and wouldn't hesitate to delete your blog

I'm not sure about pillowfort i heard it's allow nsfw but not as free as twitter? Correct me if I'm wrong tho i never use it

Facebook? Nah i wouldn't even bother.

There's Pixiv but it's not accessible for all people

Mastodon is still new and frankly many said that it has a steep learning curve

DeviantArt turned it's back both to both nsfw and sfw artist with their censorship (literally i see more and more artist who have to censor tits, cock, asshole and even pussy) and also their bullshit piece of shit AI generation + stealing from artist for their generator

Sites like Rule 34 and Hentai site are there but they are not really platform to grow your audience as an artist + too many art thief

Patreon I heard implementing more censorship? It's not social media but many artist using it

Poipiku is a Japanese platform and not all people are native Japan speaker

The fucking dystopian corporations like apple and Google ( and purity culture both in fandom and non fandom) keep sanitizing the internet and wiped out nsfw content for profit (it's not for protecting children or blah blah blah it's all for ads) kicking out all nsfw content creators from all platform they touch, forcing us to wander with no home to express ourselves. NSFW artist still have some wiggle room to thrive but I think sex workers have it harder to thrive on a more mainstream platform...

I know there's many sites for sex workers like for camgirl or whatever but mainstream sites that once more accepting of nsfw has been kicking down sex workers down to the curb again and again and again

If Twitter let's say goes down suddenly or gradually goes down and maybe banning nsfw... Artist will lost the last mainstream global platform that allow them to grow an audience as an nsfw artist

This for fandom nsfw artist who are not using site like poipiku and pixiv it left us with only AO3 to store our art

Yes you can post art to AO3 just tag it as art, literally it is the best safe haven for writing + art with it's mission to protect people creation, they even have lawyer and stuff to protect your rights + AO3 is super nsfw friendly literally you can upload anything that is legal within the USA law (that's a lot of things, thank God it's not based on my country Indonesia law or you wouldn't even see gay people kissing)

But AO3 is primarily used for fanfic + it's not a social media and shouldn't ever be a social media, it is an archive to preserve fanwork. It is fanwork library of Alexandria. The downside because it's not a social media and thus doesn't have features like chatting, algorithm and stuff is that it's harder for you to grow like in other social media. Let's say Twitter really gone if i want to post a series of comic/manga

Then i have to post the sfw/censored pages to Tumblr + post the nsfw page to AO3 it'll be a hassle for both me and my readers but it's possible

Still such a hassle and it'll be easier to just post to Twitter or when Tumblr still allowed nsfw

Also original artist will find it harder to gain audience faster on Tumblr and AO3 because both website are primarily for fandom. Like i can draw a sketch of let's say Anakin Skywalker and it'll get more traction than a fully rendered piece of original artwork

I mean it's possible but if you want to get traction easily as an original artist your art have to be godlike to be noticed amongst seas of fanart that the general public sees as more favorable... I mean you can try to build audience with doing fanwork and once you got big you can post more OG art

Still... It's easier to grow as an original artist on Twitter than on Tumblr or other platform...

Look yeah it's fun to see Twitter on fire but if it's really gone it'll be a disaster for nsfw creators/artist especially those who are making money from it to keep the roof above their head. I hope Twitter doesn't die tbh (I only made acc to see nsfw art, if Tumblr didn't ban porn i wouldn't even bother to use it or too many social media) also this situation brought back the reminder of AO3 importance as the safest and biggest archive especially for nsfw writers and fan artist that keep losing places to post their work, express themselves and earn a living

[midnight-in-eden]

Saw a photo of one of my extended relatives on Facebook today, a young teen girl. She had “daily repentance is the pathway to purity” written in pen on her arm with cute flowers drawn around it. It’s a Russell Nelson quote from April 2019 general conference, and it made me sad. I know how intensely I pressured myself, and got pressured by teachers and leaders, when it came to repentance and purity as a teenager. I don’t think it’s healthy for a kid to be so focused on it that she needed to write it onto her own body :(

For fucks’ sake can the church stop relentlessly reminding children of the “importance” and “necessity” of repentance? It’s like those parents who relentlessly nag their teen about healthy eating and watching their weight and the kid ends up with an eating disorder. The point of childhood is not constant self-improvement and worrying about things like repenting and being “pure.” Let them be kids.

[starberrywander]

This might be a controversial opinion but I think most of my fellow progressives need to hear this:

You NEED to stop attacking conservatives, because all of your hostility only feeds into their “The left is full of prideful/hypocritical/irrational/etc assholes” rhetoric and is a major tool used by far-right propagandists to manipulate good people into hateful and dangerous ideas. Your hostility is contributing to far-right radicalization just as much, if not more, than the content put out by hate campaigns and extremists. 

I have seen it plenty of times both in my own life and online. Conservatives frequently talk about how hostile “the left” behaves and it forms a basis for a lot of their unsavory ideals. 

As someone who lives in a very conservative region of one of the most red states in the US, most of the people I know in person are conservative or at least conservative-leaning, especially in my family. But, you would be surprised just how many of them express agreement with progressive ideals either without realizing or while refusing to better understand them simply because they see progressives as hostile and unwelcoming. Like, I have no doubt in my mind that many of these people would happily and enthusiastically join even some of the most progressive social movements if they hadn’t had such a horrible impression of progressives painted to them. Many have experiences with being attacked, harassed, and called names for trying to express their concerns and opinions in progressive spaces. Many more have also seen that same scenario play out many times to other people who they respect or care for. If you don’t believe me, let me give you a prominent example from my life:

My grandmother is very conservative. Like, watches (or at least used to watch) fox news on a regular basis and refers to herself as “Super MAGA.” However, despite very explicitly aligning herself with the right-leaning conservative crowd and often making comments (mostly out of ignorance not maliciousness, I’ve learned) that would probably set a good number of y’all into rage mode, when individual issues are discussed in good faith she often takes a more progressive position. Of course there are exceptions, especially because she has been exposing herself to a lot of right-wing propaganda and definitely has been influenced by some hate campaigns, but she certainly doesn’t fit the stereotype and would absolutely be aligning herself with the left in a different situation. She is very supportive of LGBT people and, though she is a bit skeptical of things like gender reassignment surgery because of the things she gets told on facebook, she isn’t hateful toward trans people like many would probably assume. In fact all it took was a simple, calm explanation of my perspective for her to easily accept nonbinary identities (including, I think, neopronouns and xenogenders, though I haven’t heard anything from her specifically on those topics). She has even expressed that sentiment to other family members since then and I think it was well received.

Of course, there are certainly people who are too stubborn and prejudiced to even consider changing their mind, but they are a minority. Many of these people that get clocked as “bigots” are actually very kind-hearted people who were only ever able to have their genuine concerns heard or validated by people on the conservative right. They are the way they are because they were harassed or made to feel unwelcome in progressive spaces so they looked elsewhere for support and community. 

If you need more examples, here is just one of the many videos of people expressing this type of experience (this is also the video that made me realize that I should probably make a post to express this): 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R3r01BruBok 

My point is that we need to be more compassionate. I don’t mean this in a moral purity way, you are absolutely justified in being upset at the types of prejudice and misinformation being spread around. I mean it in the way that your hostile and angry actions are only making the situation worse and you need to find a better outlet if we want to make progress toward convincing people to side with more progressive positions and stop voting in the kinds of people who are gonna push these discriminatory policies we’ve been seeing.

As much as we want to believe that we are rational and that enough statistics will change someone’s mind if they just listened, that is not the case. Humans are emotional beings. As much as we see ourselves as objective, we think emotionally. Even if we don’t realize it. If you attack people, even passive aggressively, you make them shut down. They stop listening. Because we are much more likely to listen to and care about the words of people who we have a positive impression of. People remember emotions far more than any words, and it doesn’t matter how correct you are or how much proof you have, if you come at people with hostility and anger that attack and the emotions associated with it are the only things that are going to stick. They aren’t going to remember your statistics. They aren’t going to remember your facts. They’re going to remember how you harassed them and called them names. They’re going to remember how you demanded they adopt your beliefs without listening to theirs.

I don’t care how much you wanna scream, its not going to help anything. All people will remember is how you made them feel. We only care about statistics and facts when we care about the subject, because that’s just how humans are. You may find some exceptions, but they are few and far between and you shouldn’t rely on their existence. You need to be kind. You need to be compassionate. 

If you need to say something to vent say it privately. Write it down then make a wish and delete it like you’re blowing out the candles on a birthday cake. Keep a journal of all your rants and frustrations. Just keep them out of public spaces, for fucks sake. They are not helpful. You can edit them to be kinder, but please stop with the hostile posts. You are making it worse and the only benefit it serves is an ego boost from “dunking on the dummy conservatives.” You don’t need to say everything that comes to your mind. I know I’ve done this before too so I can sympathize but its really time we all start being more intentional with the ways we react to people.

Stop calling people names. Stop accusing people of things (even if they are. It achieves nothing.) Stop telling people to shut up. If they something particularly nasty just report and block them. If its real life just try to go somewhere else or ask them to stop or something. Like, you can absolutely attempt to explain why there is an issue with it, why you are uncomfortable with it, and why you will not accept it. But for goodness sake please do it respectfully. Even if you don’t think the person deserves respect, being hostile only makes things worse. Find a different way to express your anger. 

Yes, there will be people who won’t listen. Yes, there will still be people who paint you as irrational for being concerned or for caring about certain issues (that’s gaslighting, don’t let it get to you. Call it out if you need to.) You can’t change that. You can’t force people to change their minds. What you can do is control yourself and practice some patience. 

It is extremely important that we promote acceptance and fight against far right extremist radicalization. Especially now, when people are getting more extreme in their views and feeling emboldened to discriminate more openly. We need to get more people away from the conservative rabbit hole and we cannot do that if your immediate reaction is to attack them for disagreeing with you. People are the products of their experiences and their communities. People join communities that make them feel accepted and validated. If you harass people, its just going to make them want to join the other “enemy” community who will show them sympathy for the hurt you caused. I don’t care how much you don’t think they deserve it. I don’t care how much you feel justified. I don’t care how nasty they are being. You need to treat people with respect and compassion if you want them to agree with you on any level.

 I will probably be talking about this more in the future so I’m gonna make a hashtag to keep it all in the same place. 

“Progressives please chill and find a more productive approach for fucks sake”

#ppcafampaffs