#followers is a survival tactic since she literally doesn’t know what to do or how to go home

[swordmaid]

in my hc the noble houses of menzoberranzan operate similarly to the houses in ice and fire where they’re constantly feuding with each other but instead of trying to take the throne/control of the whole realm they’re all fighting for lolth’s favour instead. and because they can’t outright declare war on each other (forgot the reason for why they can’t exactly do that but iirc lolth doesn’t like it?? she loves the drama I guess) and if they rise too quickly lolth casts them down so they have to be cunning about it. not to mention if they stay too long in power and do nothing about it that also displeases the spider queen so the nobility’s game of intrigue is constantly moving and working both for self gain and for self preservation.

shri’iia also plays the game but more of a pawn than a player. she’s not born from any noble house (she’s actually a commoner). the only reason why she has any foot in the game is that she’s taken in by the matriarch of faen tlabbar - one of the houses who fervently worships lolth to the point of zealotry - when they’ve heard word that she—a commoner—have managed to succeed lolth’s trials and gained her blessing. lolth blessings are rare to come and making someone a paladin is even more rare so for a zealot house, that’s a a sign they can’t pass up. so, the house matriarch takes her in and keeps in a tower where she’s supposed to pray and train to lolth day and night. the paladin oath that shri’iia swears is both for lolth and her matriarch; she swears to punish the enemies of her mistresses and forever keep her loyalty to them. her matriarch’s word is an extension to lolth’s will, so to disobey her will be disobeying lolth herself.

and ofc shri’iia being born poor with everything to give and nothing to lose, who thought that there is more to her life than a merchant’s daughter, to be known by the goddess she worship and noticed by one of the most influential houses in the city, swears herself to that oath. she never regretted that choice not even when she’s kept in that tower in complete isolation with her matriarch being the only person she could interact with.

[kakuzatos]

makima’s manipulation tactics

!! spoilers for chainsaw man!! 

i. takes advantage of a character’s feelings for her and flattery

i’ve written about the tsaritsa and how she sees childe and the other harbingers (implied) as dogs in my fic titled ‘i bet on losing dogs’. there’s a phrase there where i write, “Show a wounded dog love, and it will swear its loyalty to you.” 

i think it would’ve been more fitting to makima and denji’s relationship. denji is an impoverished boy. he doesn’t get to eat actual food (it’s a miracle that he survived, holy shit), he sold one of his balls, he worked for all his life just to pay the debt of his father, he gets killed mercilessly then revived but his buddy disappears. he’s a wounded dog. and makima enters the scene. she gives him a hug. she shows him “love.”

denji, the naive boy he is, is easily swayed. he falls in love with makima in an instant which makes him all the more vulnerable to makima’s manipulation where makima uses his feelings. 

throughout the story, there are scenes where makima grants something first then asks for a favor.

she does it with aki in chapter 11 where she says, "because i trust you more than anyone." these are words aki wants to hear, especially from her. now that he got it, he lets denji and power stay at his place--makima's request.

in chapter 12, makima shows denji that she is capable of granting him what he wants by letting him touch her chest, therefore, denji is more motivated to do what she asks, which is killing the gun devil.

for flattery,  she does it with denji in chapter 2 where she answers denji’s question of “what type of guy do you like?” with “someone like this boy named denji”. 

it echoes her preference for people who are easily swayed and the type who will do anything for her. and because she knows denji likes her, she says the words he wants to hear. 

she rewards her dogs flattery too, just so they can believe that they are being treated right. 

i think this is makima’s most used way of manipulating people around her because she knows it’s one of the easiest ways to getting what she wants. she has the charm to do it. denji thinks of her as an angel; he owes her because she “saved” denji when he was at his most vulnerable, and that’s what make this tactic so effective. 

 ii.  takes advantage of a character’s fear of her

power showcases this best since she feels a great fear for makima due to makima’s powers as the control devil. although makima doesn’t grant power anything, she knows power fears her, so that’s enough for power to follow her. 

 iii. using threats or coercion 

literally in chapter 2, you see makima threatening to kill denji if he doesn’t kill the devil who took the kid. if he didn’t get the job done, he will get killed, or in makima’s words, euthanized. 

chapter 5, makima threatens denji and power to be executed if they were to be removed from aki’s squad.

basically, makima scares denji. she says that he’ll be put to death once he doesn’t obey her commands. and she will kill him if he does disobey, given that she doesn’t really care about denji at all. she doesn’t need him, she needs pochita. denji is nothing but a dog that says yes or woof. otherwise, denji is nothing. 

iv. dehumanizing people

makima sure likes to refer to people she knows as dogs, well because she views them as such and she knows calling them dogs will, little by little, dehumanize them. and that repetitive calling can affect denji’s view of himself. 

instead of him thinking that he is a person, that he isn’t just some dog, he slowly succumbs to the thought that he might be just a dog--a dog that can very well be controlled by makima. which led him to say this in chapter 80.

what a contrast to this page of chapter 2. 

v. using her authority and blackmailing

in chapter 33, she blackmails the yakuza by bringing them the eyes of their loved ones. she uses her authority to make sure she has her way, even in twisted ways like this.

vi. lying, gaslighting and guilt-tripping

in chapter 82, makima lies to denji, gaslit him and guilt-tripped him into thinking that he was at fault for defending himself, and for power’s and aki’s death. 

all of this is done to crush denji even more. he’s already at the lowest point of his life, having to see aki’s fate and battling him, and makima wounds him even further. 

this tactic is used by real-life manipulators who know that their victim is already in a vulnerable state. so, the manipulator can take control of the victim’s feelings and view of themself.

most manipulators are portrayed as this “bad” characters who shames people all the time and actively hates them. but in real life, manipulators can be the one who looks kind on the outside; the quiet one; the soft-spoken one; the charming one. 

makima’s character is disturbing because she’s portrayed as this “good” person who showed up in denji’s life at the right time; the person who saved him. and makima uses this to her advantage to get what she wants. 

[probably-haven]

I’ve been thinking about Childe a lot recently- because my friends slander him relentlessly and other than one person who kinda semi-likes him I’m the only one who actually likes his character.... and I know I’ve slandered him a fair amount myself but just- 

-

He was a child. 

A child - No ‘e’. No puns. No jokes. Not this time. 

He was only fourteen. 

-

His story described him as “frightened and hesitant” prior to his time in the abyss. All he wanted was an adventure of his own. To make an adventurer of himself, the likes of which he had heard so many times in the stories of his father. To be like him. He didn’t even go seeking the abyss or any kind of grave danger or incredible power, he was just a naïve little boy, running away from home with almost nothing in chase of a story of his own. 

And yet he was fated to fail, and everything went south almost immediately. Lost in the freezing cold forest environments of Snezhnaya, he was completely alone save for the wild animals on his trail. And by an unlucky roll of the dice - or perhaps because in that moment, his desire and drive to survive, to live, to get back to his family, was so strong that even the abyss itself took notice - the world he knew was stripped away. 

Scared and vulnerable with only a shortsword for protection, Ajax was torn from what already would have served to be traumatizing enough for the child, and thrust into something immeasurably worse. 

Described as “a bottomless crack in the earth’s surface,” “the endless possibilities of another ancient world,” and “the darkest corners of the universe;” the abyss is not a place that ordinary people are meant to survive.  Now I could go on about what the abyss may be or who the swordswoman might be or what might have happened to him, but the point is: it doesn’t matter what happened, his trauma is trauma nonetheless and its not in his control nor is it his fault how his brain decided to process it. Regardless, I think “endless possibilities” within the “darkest corners of the universe” speaks well enough for the severity.

Even without this however, it is important to note that for three months of what logically would have driven anyone to or past the brink, he had one consistent point of relative safety in the form of the swordswoman, a person who while training him for destruction, was also deliberately manipulating into him “the ability to stir up endless havoc.” 

Placed in an extremely traumatic situation like this and being manipulated by one he would have been forced to see as an anchor of sorts, simultaneously holding him together and molding him into the twisted version of himself that she wanted him to be; Realistically, Childe is more a victim than anything else.

And he returned - still only a fourteen year old child - to his home. 

Now an interesting point: based on the wording of his character story, it seems as though when he came out from the abyss, his new demeanor actually unnervingly reflects his hopes when he ran away, implying that the swordswoman very well could have used his own ambition as a cruel mirror to shape him based off, or used them merely as an additional manipulation tactic. “He acted as if this world revolved around him, and as if battle existed for his sake.” Almost as though he were truly the protagonist in an adventure story of his own, just like his father before- or perhaps that’s what he was made to believe. 

Regardless, Childe quickly gained a reputation for havoc, chaos, and violence, as it followed him and he spread it wherever he went, just as he had learnt to do during his time in the abyss, constantly seeking that unpredictability, the thrill of combat. 

And this continued until he went too far, and in response to this, the father that he admired so greatly sent Ajax away into the strict military environment of the Fatui. The idea was that the highly strict environment of training for the literal military, would “hone his son’s temper.” Not dampen, or control, or reduce in any way, but “hone” - to sharpen it, to refine and perfect it. And he watched “fully-armed troops getting the stuffing beaten out of them by a mere child.“

He was only a child. 

Everything he went through in the abyss and all the changes he went through himself, only to be shipped into military by the family who could no longer handle dealing with the effects of what he experienced... 

And he was just a kid. 

-

oh but they honed his temper alright. Not only was he entered in this military training like his father had planned originally, but soon after, the young child was selected and placed within the official ranks of the Fatui themselves under the guise of being a punishment.

Told to work his way up the ranks from the bottom, the Fatui “honed” his temper and penchant for combat towards the purpose of serving the Tsaritsa, encouraging these tendencies that would only continue to grow stronger and more apparent with time as a result of their actions, which was exactly their intent. These, psychologically and neurologically, were the key years for his mental development.

And once again the young Ajax found himself the victim of another’s subtle manipulation.  Until he was Ajax no more. 

-

Childe has been under the constant task of further proving himself since enlisting in the Fatui, and once he gained the recognition of the Tsaritsa, the only next possible way of doing that was by comparing his skills to others. And thus far, he has exceed in this time and time again, so with the evidence before him his arrogant confidence in his abilities is by no means unreasonable. Nor is his tendency to express friendship and varied other things through combat, it’s only natural after besting others in battle became his main source of acknowledgement throughout his younger years. 

He’s fiercely loyal as well, to the point where - were his sense of loyalty not so shrouded in his delusion of what loyalty is meant to be - it would likely border on codependency. He also doesn’t seem to have the greatest understanding of social cues, as expected with his combat-oriented upbringing, and tends to have an unnerving aura to a lot of the things he says that he doesn’t seem aware of. 

His loyalty to the Tsaritsa rings true, and seems to be his highest priority above all others, an ideology that, once again has been drilled into him since the age of 14. However, despite this, he is disliked and avoided even by his fellow harbingers, and often kept out of their true plans in a way that clearly shows what low opinions they have of his abilities in certain areas. 

And yet, through it all, he still maintains his own set of values and seeks to make genuine connections which people, which while these efforts may be unsuccessful in most cases, and these values far in between - It still firmly shows the strength of his character which, though in fragments, managed to remain as a part of who he is in spite of his circumstance. 

-

And i get that he’s memeable and slanderable and easy for a lot of people to just hate outright, i really do but sometimes it feels like a lot of people only ever see him at surface value and a lot of people dont even know his story and even fewer still actually consider the implications of that background. He was literally a child soldier - that and even more; “endless possibilities” more.

I have nothing against Childe slander, genuinely - but eventually, when it reaches a certain extent...

It’s not bad, I’m just tired.

[ianthe-is-a-bitch-and-i-love-her]

On Family

An excerpt from Memoirs of a Flesh Eater, never published

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One question that I see asked in the news a lot is why there are still any ghouls left. We have a distinctive, high-impact feeding habit that requires us to stay within human society, where we are both outnumbered and outgunned. This has essentially been the case since the development of automatic firearms, and you’ve continued to develop more and more effective methods of killing us since then. How are we not extinct?

The talking heads always have lurid theories to propose. My personal favorite one, which comes up every couple of years or so, is that the government is secretly breeding us so that they have an excuse to send secret police out into the general populace for nefarious purposes pretending to be exterminators. As if they’d need the excuse {Editing Note: I’ve gotta keep my political views out of this except where they directly pertain to ghouls. No unnecessarily alienating people}. The most commonly accepted one seems to be that we just have a lot of children to compensate for our high mortality rate. Spatha calls that an R strategy, I think. Scarlet calls it the Rabbit Theory. Whatever you call it, it’s wrong. Our species has survived off the strength and compassion of our families.

Contrary to popular impressions, our “nuclear” families are pretty small. My understanding is that 1-4 children is the typical range. I’m the only confirmed only child in my friend group. Scarlet’s the youngest of three, Scorpio’s a middle child, Spatha avoids talking about her home life, and Kestrel doesn’t know her biological parents. There’s a couple of pressures that keep our family sizes small. First, it’s challenging to feed too many ghouls at once, especially ghoul children, who we don’t want worrying about where they’re going to get their meals. Second, the majority of ghoul parents are going to end up as single parents before their kids are fully grown. Either one of them is going to get killed, or they’re going to have to separate to go on the run from the exterminators; and, of course, we do still break up and get divorced sometimes.

These pressures are exaggerated by our general lack of an extended family. It’s not that all of our aunts and uncles get hunted down - even if they did, we’d still have cousins - but it’s not safe for us to have traceable extended families. When exterminators identify a ghoul, the first thing they do is put out a bulletin for all known blood relatives. The most common tactic to avoid this is, when multiple siblings make it to adulthood, at least one of them changes their identity and moves away. This isn’t always done, but it’s done often enough that document forging is a widespread and well-respected profession in the Society. It’s useful for dodging exterminators in other circumstances too. My mom and I changed our names and moved cities after exterminators killed my dad when I was 4.

Between that and the sheer number of out-and-out orphans in our Society, it should come as no surprise that we’ve developed a new family structure to fill in the gaps. The terminology we use for this structure is variable, but the term I’ve always used is “household”. A household is a sort of adopted extended family, typically formed by and centered around one particularly resourceful ghoul called a patron. The patron takes whichever ghouls they choose under their wing, introduces them to each other, and helps them coordinate their talents and resources so that they all have everything they need. Most obviously, this means making sure they all have a supply of flesh, but there are numerous other kinds of support a household can provide. I doubt I need to emphasize again how valuable a reliable source of companionship and safety is, but patrons typically have access to connections and contacts that can help the other members of the household accomplish their goals.

My household, for example, was founded by our patron Yaga. It consists of her, her adopted daughter Kestrel, my mom and I, my friends Scarlet and Scorpio and their immediate families, and four other older ghouls. There’s also Spatha, who has been reluctant to fully join the household but acts like a member in most contexts. Three of our members have reliable flesh sources, and Yaga coordinates with other ghouls to find supplementary sources to ensure that she always has a surplus on hand. This keeps all of us well-fed and lets her distribute the rest to those in need in exchange for favors and cachet that the rest of us can use for our own advancement. In turn, the rest of us pitch in for odd jobs here and there, mostly on flesh-gathering jobs of one kind or another, and we look out for each other. I’ve done a bit of babysitting with Kestrel, for example, and Yaga was able to get me and Scarlet summer jobs to save up for college.

Babysitting, by the way, is one of the most valuable services a household can provide to a ghoul parent. Given our mortality rate, it probably isn’t a surprise that there’s a good bit of cultural pressure to have children, and have them quick. Ghoul children are… a lot. When we’re newborn, we’re pretty much like human babies. Ghoul babies can nurse from ghoul mothers for awhile, which is a relief. They need to switch to flesh before their teeth come in, though, so that means flesh slurry, which is more complicated to make than you might think. For best results, you want a mix of blood, muscle tissue, organ tissue, and bone, especially marrow. We get better at pulling all our nutrients from just flesh as we mature, but babies aren’t as developed. Getting those varied tissues is a little more complicated than just getting flesh. Bone especially is challenging - more mature ghouls have no need for it, and it’s honestly kinda gross. You just have to hope that whoever you’re getting flesh from can start holding some bones for you. Not every source has easy access to bones. 

{Editing Note: I think I wrote bone too many times - it looks fake now. Bone. Bone.}

We get our ghoul teeth at the same time as our baby teeth. Our ghoul teeth fall out and are replaced too, but we keep growing new ones our whole lives, kinda like sharks. Funnily enough, I don’t think we grow extra human teeth, which seems like a strange way for evolution to take us, but what do I know, I’m not a biologist. At that point we can start eating regular flesh, and parents have the unenviable task of explaining to toddlers that they can’t just slide their teeth out whenever they want. Our other features come in a bit later - claws between 4 and 6, eyes with puberty. Let me tell you, the claws hurt coming in. I couldn’t hold a pencil for a month. My mom told the elementary school that I was deathly sick so she could keep me home, but I think Scarlet just pretended he’d broken both his hands and went in splints. I don’t envy him - stretching my claws did a lot to relieve the pain.

I’ll admit freely that, by our standards, I had a pretty charmed childhood. I fit into human society pretty easily, I had a mom who loved me and could provide for me, a patron and household to help pick up the slack, and ghoul friends my own age. I had the discipline to keep my true nature hidden from my human peers, and I don’t think I was even particularly traumatized by the pressure of performing humanity that much. I can safely attribute that to the fact that I had safe spaces throughout my life to let the charade drop. Most ghouls at least have that. Most, but not all.

Our integration into human society also means that we inevitably become entangled in human society. We become invested in the lives of our human peers, we befriend them, care about them. Sometimes we fall in love with them. Eating people seems like kind of a big secret to keep from a potential romantic partner - I certainly couldn’t manage it - but some ghouls form romantic relationships with humans nonetheless. Maybe some of these human partners eventually discover the truth and are willing to overlook it for the person they love, but I doubt it happens often. I’ve certainly never heard of it. I’ve heard of it going the other way, though, a human partner discovering the truth and reacting poorly. Someone always dies when that happens. I personally know a few ghouls who’ve dated humans, or are seriously involved with them. Frankly, it scares the hell out of me. I get that the heart wants what it wants, but some wants aren’t worth the risk.

{Editing Note: That last line feels… tense. Emotionally charged. Why? And should I change it?}

In my opinion, the gravest of these risks is what happens when a human and a ghoul decide they want to build a life together, but kids are already in the equation. The human-ghoul mixed family is probably the most toxic environment that a ghoul child could be raised in and conceivably survive. All that pressure of hiding your true nature from your peers as you grow up? That feeling of isolation that follows you everywhere you go among humans? All of the most crushing emotional turmoil I’ve described in this book so far? Imagine if there was no relief for that even at home with your family. I frankly have no idea how ghoul parents manage to feed themselves and their children without being caught, or how they manage to perform humanity so flawlessly and constantly that their literal immediate family never catches on. I don’t know how those children manage to survive to adulthood, but I imagine they have some seriously fucked up mental health problems by the time they do. Factor in the suspicion that they would inevitably face from our Society when they finally are able to join it properly - after all, who more likely to become a Judas or be Lost than a ghoul raised by humans? - and I’d be willing to bet most of them don’t make it out of their twenties.

Before we move on entirely from families in general and mixed families in particular, I’d like to take a quick aside to talk about “half-ghouls”. You hear about them in horror media fairly often, the biological child of a human and a ghoul. Authors love to ascribe all sorts of traits to these hypothetical creatures - greater and more monstrous than the sum of their parts, supernaturally strong and vicious, impossible to detect within human society, sometimes with traits that are blatantly impossible, like telepathy or mind control or just plain magic. All of that is obviously untrue, but it’s something of a point of contention as to whether or not a “half-ghoul” is even possible. None of the ghouls I’ve talked to seem to agree about whether it can happen, and a search of human medical literature was similarly inconclusive. Humans, at least, seem to think that it might be theoretically possible, but have never been able to verify it by observation or by medical experiment. Of the ghouls I know that have been romantically involved with humans, none of them have ever gotten a kid out of it. It’s one of those things where we just don’t know. If it were possible, I’m not even sure what the implications would be.

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Among Us: Mansion Edition

Aight because I’m feeling stupid--I’m talking absolutely Willy Wonka--in this Chili’s tonight, I think it’s time I inundated you all in random crack ass Among Us Headcanons for the mansion. In no particular order: 

-Y’all see this post? This right here is Leo and MC. Don’t even @ me. He’s such a bastard and she glares at him the whole time while he just fucking dies laughing in their room. When Theo finds out? He howls with laughter too, later high fives Leo

-Dazai, Sebas, and Comte are the MOST sus players on earth. Like these mofos will handle accusations so calmly and dismantle them so quickly nobody fucking knows what they're actually doing??? The others always skip until there’s hard evidence, but because of that they will often survive by the time the tasks are done 

-Every single time Arthur has even the slightest bit of suspicion directed at him for being the imposter, everyone just immediately votes him off. Half the time he isn’t the imposter, and every single time people can hear Theo cackling from wherever he is

-One of the easiest ways to narrow down Theo as the imposter is to see how long Vincent survives HAHAHA (Vincent takes 13 yrs to do tasks)

-Since Vincent struggles with tasks a lot, Theo will often do buddy system (MC will often tag along too--but Theo will just straight up kill her when he’s imposter and tell Vincent she’s busy with another task LMFAO Vincent always scolds him after)

-Isaac hates being imposter. With every. Fiber. Of. His being. HE HATES IT!!! He vents, they see him immediately, they boot him. FML. Also gives himself away because he will usually kill Dazai and Arthur first, and stutters like a maniac trying to defend himself--has no good alibi in a pinch LMAO

-Isaac groans every single time he gets a task in the electrical room. His palms start sweating because he just knows someone is going to sneak in and snap his neck while frantically trying to connect wires. Arthur most often kills him that way just because he finds it hilarious to hear Isaac curse

-Leo, Arthur, and Shakespeare are the ones most known to sabotage while they’re imposters. Leo just loves being a headache of a person, Arthur finds it most efficient to murder in the course of the chaos (after there’s a kind of false sense of security, he picks them off), while Shakes just love watching everyone scatter desperately like mice.

-Shakespeare is 100% that imposter that like stays beside Vincent the whole time while he’s doing tasks, playing buddy system, and then the second the game is about to end just straight up murders him in cold blood out of nowhere

-Comte will almost always enact petty revenge if someone kills MC early in the game--or at all. Catch this mofo finishing his tasks lightening speed and sitting at the security monitors, slamming the emergency button the second he’s deduced who the culprit is. He’s usually the fastest to figure it out; how quickly he responds is another matter lol

-Jeanne gets caught in milliseconds because he won’t even care about the mechanics of the game, and finds sneaking boring/stupid/too much effort (also just bad with technology, it takes him forever to learn the controls). Will at least attempt to kill in isolation, but otherwise doesn’t much care about being stealthy--and so is often caught fast (always kills Comte first much to the man’s dismay)

-Mozart is...surprisingly good at the game? Not quite as skilled as the trio mentioned earlier, but he’s very good at coming up with air-tight alibis and employs a slow, methodical approach. Will have 5 or 6 of them dead before anyone suspects it’s him, kills randomized targets, and will frequent the security room while people are trying to figure out who it is. Will do buddy system with Jeanne, and will usually find the imposter to avenge his good friendo--otherwise just does tasks and chills if he ain’t imposter

-Leo just plays to have fun! He’s good at it but doesn’t really go hard enough to evade suspicion for very long if he’s imposter, mostly kills people he thinks will be most frustrated with being killed/least suspecting. People are usually yelling at him to complete his tasks bc he often zones out when he becomes a ghost LMFAO

-Leo and Comte sometimes do the buddy system, but honestly? They just devolve into murdering each other so fucking fast it’s pointless AHHAHAHAHHAHAH they’re just constantly squinting at each other; they don’t trust the other as far he can throw him (Idk if y’all have seen any of Vanoss’ streams on yt but I just keep seeing that clip of him in MedBay getting scanned and going “nogla you gonna kill me? just fucking kill me you fucking french bastard” when nogla lingers a little next to him and I start wheezing because all I see is literally Leo and Comte)

-Napoleon rarely gets imposter, so he’s usually spearheading the crewmate effort. Gets his tasks done very quickly (if he doesn’t get murdered; though he often has Isaac for buddy system) and camps outside the security room after making a few rounds. Usually figures out who it is fairly quickly--though his accuracy is spotty

-If Napoleon is imposter he tends to have a hard time killing people, so he’ll literally just pretend to do tasks and vibe until the time runs out. It’s the inactivity and aimlessness that tends to give him away

-MC tries to be stealthy, but she usually times her kills poorly or gets walked in on. Sometimes she manages to conceal the body or her boo looks the other way to let her indulge in the fun, but otherwise she gets found as imposter fast

-There are a few legendary rounds where MC manages to fool most of the house into thinking she’s a crewmate because they’re so busy pointing fingers at each other she just skates by easy, but she always feels horrible after for betraying their trust (the men all silently agree it was uproarious)

-Vincent as imposter is fucking hilarious because he’ll just turn himself in???? Like he won’t even try. Everyone will tell him it’s okay if he gets a little stabby--it’s part of the game--but he just has no heart for it. Theo will often switch devices with him to relieve him of the stress. These rounds are always so chaotic because it usually takes the residents a second to deduce the switcheroo

-You know how I said Shakespeare plays buddy and then kills Vincent in cold blood? The hilarious inversion of this is that Dazai will often try to follow Isaac to protect him but Isaac will run away, so they will often be chasing each other all over the map LMFAOOOO Dazai will do this regardless of whether he is imposter or not, so there’s really no way to tell if he’s just messing with Isaac or has a lurking killer intent

-If Theo is imposter? Pandemonium. He will kill people off one by one in isolation and vent so fast nobody can figure out who did what, always paying close attention to the tasks that need doing so he has a solid alibi. Because Vincent tends to believe him and verifies easily, it can take a little longer for people to figure out it’s Theodorus. Arthur and Dazai tend to be the ones that are the first to suspect it’s him

-Sebastian will often be doing his tasks, just chillin. One can usually see him buddy system with Napo and/or MC. He loves to watch the other men be imposter and notes down their go-to tactics and reactions to killing and being killed in the game; especially if it’s uncharacteristic of them. All well and good right? 

-Sebastian as imposter? The funniest shit in the world. He’s similar to Isaac in that he hates it, mutters apologies and grimaces every time he has to kill people (note: he does not include Arthur and Dazai among people, sometimes smiles a little if he takes them out;;;;). Will lie convincingly only because his voice/writing does not waver--his stoicism serves him well. When he has to kill Napoleon, though? Forget it. He apologizes a million times after, but honestly Napo just finds it hilarious--will just be like “well-played, Sebas, as expected of our resourceful butler.” Sebas still. Feels guilty. Like you can literally look at the chat history and see Napo as ghost like “AAHAHAHHA oh he killed my ass, nice” while MC’s like “lolol” and Jeanne like “he got me good too, never saw him coming in nav”

-Person who gets killed the least? Vincent (I mean come on, it’s Vincent.) MC is runner-up. They don’t like killing her, but there are a lot of idiots in the mansion that do it just to get a rise out of her (cough Leonardo/Dazai) or just because she’s an easy target in the moment

-Person who gets killed the most? Usually Arthur, runner-up Isaac (Arthur because everyone seeks to get back at him for his shenanigans irl, Isaac because he tends to get indecisive/nervous)

-Also this happens to Dazai once as imposter (Isaac plans it out of sheer spite) and the entire mansion was wheezing about it for weeks

In-game Colors: 

Comte: yellow/white/black (when he’s feeling emo) + little baby accompaniment or party hat  Napoleon: black or green, cyan when he’s feeling chaotic + sergeant/army hat Leonardo: brown + toilet paper roll Vincent: yellow + green sprout Theo: dark blue or red (feral energy) + cowboy hat or gladiator helmet Isaac: pink + cherry Arthur: dark blue or lime + backwards cap Dazai: purple or yellow + toilet plunger or bird’s nest Jeanne: always purple + “DUM” sticky note Mozart: cyan + surgical mask Shakes: red or orange + flamingo hat Sebas: always black + either the ninja mask or the chef hat

[lena-in-a-red-dress]

Metallo!Lena AU Part 15

Lena's decision to reveal herself isn't entirely well thought out. In the weeks that follow, the media outlets flood with speculation about her veracity, her intentions, and her whereabouts for the past year. Considering Lena bolted after giving the reporters her name, their confusion isn't entirely unwarranted, but Lena has no intention of giving them any further details.

Reclaiming her name is one thing. Revealing the current condition is another.

"The last thing the world needs to hear is that there's a Luthor running around without a heart. Literally."

Kara rolls her eyes at the weak joke. "Nobody blames you for your brother's actions, Lena. If they knew what happened--"

"They'll say I should have seen it coming. It's all in the family, Kara. My brother killed me and my mother resurrected me. This is my chance to start fresh, so just... let me have it."

The unexpected outcome of it all is that Lena no longer needs to hide. Slowly, she starts to venture out into the city with Kara, both with armor and without, and for the first time since her rescue, she gets to enjoy some of the things she used to.

Like watching the geese in the park, and window shopping in midtown. At first, she's able to get away unnoticed by simply wearing casual outfits, but as the media coverage persists, more and more people start to notice her. It soon becomes clear that Lena needs to make another decision.

"I have to make a statement," she says one night, lying in her bunk next to Kara. They've just come out of a sparring session, and are sweaty and tired, but still Lena's mind races.

Kara looks at her, not lifting her head. "Are you sure?"

"No. But... if I don't, I'll just lose control of my narrative all over again."

"Okay," comes the easy response. "I'll support you, whatever you decide."

Lena turns to look at her. "I'm going to need you to do more than that."

---

"You want her to WHAT?" Alex asks, when they tell her the plan.

Lena doesn't blink an eye. "I want Kara to leverage an exclusive interview with me to get her old job back."

Alex looks like she's going to pop a blood vessel. She eyes Lena, then turns her incredulous gaze on Kara. "And what do you want?"

Kara shuffles awkwardly in place, eyes on her shoes. "I... am okay with it."

It had taken some convincing. Well, not so much convincing as talking Kara out of her own pessimism. Her career was over, she'd claimed when Lena first shared her idea. Supergirl was her job now. She was needed at the DEO more than anywhere else. The world needed Supergirl.

"But what does Supergirl need?" Lena had asked.

Now, Alex doesn't seem convinced. "Really? Because you were miserable there before you quit. Are you really ready to go back?"

Kara shrugs, sheepish and uncertain both. Lena shifts protectively in front of her. "Don't worry," she drawls, "I'm sure she'll still help at DEO if you ask nicely."

"That's not why I'm concerned," Alex scoffs.

"Then why do you care so much about what Kara chooses to do with her civilian life, Director?"

Alex pauses on the verge of retort. Then she rocks back on her heels, making pointed eye contact with Kara. Kara touches Lena shoulder, moving out from behind her.

"Because she's my sister."

Lena blinks in surprise, then freezes as her brain restructures itself to absorb this new information. "Oh. That is... not what I expected."

"What were you expecting?"

"...doesn't matter."

Alex huffs, irritation flaring. "Kara, I don't think I need to remind you of what it was like when you were working at CatCo--"

"I loved CatCo. I still do." Kara's shoulders lift. "Looking back, I don't think CatCo was the reason I was miserable. It's just the part of my life that suffered the most. But--" She looks at Lena, shoulders squaring. "Things are different now. I can't be Supergirl all my life. I need more. I always have."

With a sigh, Alex relents. "Fine. What do you need from me?"

---

James is nothing if not surprised to see Kara slip into his office one afternoon. She's clearly nervous, fidgeting with her glasses and shrinking into herself. Even so, he's glad to see her.

"Kara, hey! Wow, it's been a while. How are... things?"

He knows her secret, but after their breakup and Kara's unexpected departure from CatCo, they'd drifted apart.

"Good, good. Yeah," Kara stammers. "I, uh, I was wondering if we could talk, for a second."

James grins. "Yeah. Of course, of course. Come on in."

He comes around his desk, meeting Kara at the couches. A little thrill rushes through him at their proximity, before he shakes himself out of it. He never got a chance to settle back into frienship with Kara, and he regrets the distance between them.

When they sit, he tries to ease her nerves with a grin. "What's happening?"

Kara smooths her hands on the tops of her thighs, and takes a deep breath. Then, she straightens and turns to face him.

"I came here to discuss the possibility of me getting my job back."

"Your job," James repeats. "Here. At CatCo."

Kara nods. "Yes. At CatCo."

"Oh... I don't know, Kara."

"I know it's a tall ask--"

James barks a laugh. "A tall ask? It's been over a year, and I hate to say it, but Snapper hasn't gotten any better since you left."

"He wasn't why I left..."

"I actually figured it was because of me."

Kara's eyes widen, and her cheeks heat with a flush as she scrambles to deny it. "James, no-- that's not--"

"You don't need to explain anything to me, Kara, really...  but I have to say, a rehire would be a tough sell with Snapper, I'm sorry."

"You don't have to sell him anything," Kara rebuts, her voice steeling. Her gaze took on a hard glint. "You're his boss."

James nods. "That's true, but I wouldn't be doing you any favors by forcing you on him."

"I'm not asking for any favors--"

"Kara."

"You know what I mean. I'm ready to take on anything Snapper has in store, I'm ready to pull weight, and I'm ready to go the distance. And you know the kind of person I am, James. I won't let you down."

James sighs. "I know. But... I just can't do it."

Kara nods, adjusting her glasses. "I can prove to you that CatCo needs me-- will be better to have me on board."

There's something familiar in Kara's voice now, and James realizes that he's seeing Supergirl poking through. Whatever had so shaken her a year ago, she's ready to overcome it.

"And what's that?" he asks.

"Lena Luthor."

James pauses. "What about her?"

"She's agreed to an exclusive with CatCo-- on one condition."

"With you."

"As a fully hired and salaried CatCo employee."

It's the one thing James knows he can't refuse. Every media outlet in the country is clamoring for an interview with Lena Luthor, and here she's been walked right into his office on the wings of the one former employee his editor-in-chief cannot stand. That said...

With a scoop like Lena Luthor, CatCo would survive if Snapper Carr walked out.

James hesitates, out of principle if nothing else. "You really have Lena Luthor on lock?"

Taking out her phone, Kara opens her contacts and with just a few taps of her thumb has a video chat ringing. As James watches, the black comes to life with the visage of Lena Luthor.

"Kara, hi," says the tinny voice. Despite likely expecting the call, the woman is clearly happy to see Kara.

Kara blushes, fiddling with her glasses once more. "Hi, Lena. I, um, I have James here, and he was wondering--"

"Mr. Olsen." Suddenly, Lena Luthor is all business. "I expect Kara has already explained the situation."

James nods. "She has."

"I am willing to work with CatCo, so long as I interview exclusively with Kara Danvers."

"Editorial will have input on the question list."

"Which will be screened in advance, and received with Kara's contract, signed and countersigned."

James doesn't necessarily like being dictated to, but Lena's tone is nothing less than professional. It's as though he's talking to another executive, and negotiation is a tactic he's grown accustomed to.

"We can work with that."

"At 10% above Kara's exit salary."

Ohhhhh... James chafes at that. Kara starts, then flushes-- clearly, she hadn't expected this. But there's no negotiation in Lena's tone, so he chooses to take the high road. He nods.

"All right. We'll be in touch."

previous / next

[random-thought-depository]

The infamously corny Star Trek TOS episode The Omega Glory was on TV last night and I watched it. My ideas for how I’d rewrite it to make it less silly:

---

The Yang ancestral culture wasn’t literally the USA, it was just a society that looked kind-of sort-of like the USA in the same way some pre-Columbian American and ancient Indian societies may have looked kind-of sort-of like ancient Athens. That by itself would make the episode much less stupid, and you could keep most of the same basic ideas.

Since we’re not bound to absurd levels of parallelism anymore, I’d personally be inclined to make the Kohms light-skinned blue-eyed blond(e)s and make the Yangs darker-skinned with darker hair and eyes, and imply that the Kohm ancestral society was fascist instead of communist. Maybe sprinkle some symbols distantly reminiscent of Nazi iconography around the Kohm village. It’s not like there was any meaningful connection between the Kohms and communism anyway, and I feel this resonates better with a lot of the ideas the episode was going for. Admittedly, this is probably influenced by my own biases.

---

Basically swap the roles of Cloud Williams and his mostly silent female companion who doesn’t really do much.

Why? Let’s think about how Yang society might work for a moment. I’m going to say they’re horse-riding big game hunters, like the nineteenth century Great Plains native American cultures on Earth, because 1) that fits with the idea that they’ve been driven into marginal lands and had to become nomads, 2) if you want nomads capable of assembling armies of thousands of people it’s either that or Eurasian-style herders, 3) it fits with the “they’ve become like native Americans” idea. They’re very slow-aging, theoretically capable of living over a thousand years ... but if they’re like their precedent cultures on Earth they probably live fairly rough and dangerous lives and I think would probably tend to live only a few decades or centuries before dying in a hunting accident or battle or something like that. But... going by Earth precedent, it would probably be mostly the men who do the most high-risk activities of hunting and war, which might result in very gender-asymmetrical life expectancy patterns, where men tend to only live a few decades or centuries while women stay relatively safe and have a decent chance of living to be thousand year old ancients. This would be compounded by 1) a lower death rate would mean a lower birth rate for replacement rate reproduction, 2) they’re almost immune to infectious diseases, which would make childbirth in primitive conditions much safer, so that would greatly reduce the probable primary cause of death for women in such a society (childbirth complications). So I think it’s pretty plausible that they’d have a more-or-less matriarchal society where women have a lot of power because they live a lot longer and hence have a lot more time to accumulate experience and become repositories of culture (important for a low-tech nomadic society that will have a mostly oral culture!).

So, I’d gender-swap Cloud Williams; my version of her would a matriarch with a leadership position in her tribe because she’s one of its oldest able-bodied members, she’s got a thousand years of experience and she’s had time to memorize a lot of the oral histories of her tribe and become basically a living library. Why would such a person be anywhere near a battlefield? Well, “the oral histories of her tribe” would include a lot of war stories, with detailed and often basically accurate descriptions of tactics and strategy because that’s how knowledge of how to win wars against Kohms and rival Yang tribes is transmitted in her society. She’s a living tactical manual, so of course she leads her tribe’s warriors in battle.

She could have a companion who’s a big guy who doesn’t talk much and does the brute strength side of what in the episode is Cloud Williams’s role (fighting Kirk in the cell, ripping out the bars). Maybe he’s her grandson, and was captured with her because one of his roles in the tribe is to be her bodyguard in battle.

----

Related to what I just said, have a bit where Captain Tracey says that he expected the primitive and superstitious Yangs to be overawed by phasers, but instead it was almost like they have a recent cultural memory of war with modern weapons and war against technologically superior opponents and they quickly started using effective counter tactics. Given the explanation in the episode for the long lifespans of people on Omega IV (very strong selection pressure for disease resistance), none of the Yangs would actually remember the ancient high-tech Yang civilization and original war against the Kohms, but the generational transmission chains from a lot of presently living Yang matriarchs to that time might be relatively short. For a lot of the presently living Yang matriarchs shooting down Kohm helicopters with surface-to-air missiles and ambushing Kohm armored columns in mountain passes might be something like “my grandma’s time.”

----

The reason the “Eee Plab Neesta” sounds like gibberish is that Cloud Williams is reciting it in its archaic original language, which the living Yang language has evolved into mutual incomprehensibility with. The Yangs might have one lovingly preserved paper copy of their equivalent of the Declaration of Independence, but their culture is mostly oral, and they mostly preserve the “holy words” in the heads of the matriarchs, who memorize it and transmit it from mother to daughter exactly (“by heart”), being careful to get every syllable right so it does not become distorted. The oldest matriarchs can still speak the ancient language, but for most of the Yangs, especially the relatively short-lived men, it’s like me listening to somebody recite Beowulf in its original language.

This is more-or-less my headcanon for what’s going in the actual episode too: the “Eee Plab Neesta” is just the text in its original now archaic form of the Yang language, which the universal translator can’t translate because it doesn’t have a big enough sample to work on. I’d make that much more explicit though.

The way I’d handle the scene is to have Cloud Williams start to recite the Eee Plan Neesta, and then have Kirk ask her what it means and suggest that she try to translate it into the everyday language of the Yangs so all her people could hear it with understanding, and of course it wouldn’t be the actual Declaration of Independence but something different but with a similar spirit, something like this:

“We the people of these five colonies of the nation across the sea and seven nations of the original inhabitants of this land, establish a Union, which we found in and organize according to the following principles: that all people are equally precious, that laws exist by the consent of the people and to serve the people, that leaders serve the people and hold their offices by the consent of the people...”

Then have Kirk give his speech about how these words are meant for everyone and not just for chiefs and should be something shared among all the people and lived by and not something gatekept behind archaic language most people can’t understand. Have him reference the USA founding documents by saying that his world has something very similar and he knows from the history of his own world how world-changing these ideas can be and how precious they are.

----

Obviously you can’t do that “the Yangs try to find out if Kirk recognizes the holy words, and Kirk almost recognizes them but not quite” thing with this version, so the equivalent I propose is:

Kirk recognizes the original functions of Yang “holy relics,” i.e. relics from the ancient Yang civilization: one is part of a machine that once carried people through the air (it’s a snapped-off piece of a helicopter blade), one was a device for seeing far away things as if they’re near (it’s a broken pair of binoculars), one was a machine which people could use to talk to people who were beyond the horizon (it’s a broken-down cell phone), etc.. OK, the last thing is anachronistic for TOS, but if I were writing this as a fanfic it’s what I’d do.

Cloud Williams starts to recite a long epic poem the Yangs have that tells their entire history, to see if Kirk will recognize it. Of course Kirk doesn’t, but while the Yangs don’t have history books they do use visual textile art as an aid to memory and they’ve set up a big story cloth that depicts the narrative in the room and Kirk goes over to it and starts pointing to pictures on it and correctly interpreting them:

“Here, the Yangs were oppressed by kings. The Yangs rebelled and overthrew their kings and made a new nation that had no kings. After this the Yangs became very rich and very powerful, they built great cities. The lords of the Kohms were threatened by this and they used terrible weapons on the Yangs and invaded the Yang land with great armies. Here’s a Yang city being destroyed in an instant by a Kohm weapon. The Kohm lords were so threatened that they tried to destroy the Yangs’ whole way of life. The Yangs retreated to the bad lands and kept fighting. Here are Kohm flying machines attacking a Yang village, and a Yang warrior hiding behind a rock destroying one of those flying machines with a lance of fire. The Kohm lords couldn’t overcome the Yangs until they brought the Death Thirst to the Yang lands in a box and let it out. But that weapon had a life of its own, and turned against the Kohms, and almost destroyed them too. Only a few Yangs survived in the bad lands, and the Kohms claimed the good Yang lands and settled them. But the Yangs survived, they learned the bow and the lance, and eventually their numbers started to increase. The survivors lived longer than people had before; you interpreted this as a gift for the Yangs and curse on the Kohms by the Great Spirit, so that both might live to see you retake what was once yours. And little by little, you did retake what was once yours...”

----

One way to suggest the Enterprise crew making a positive difference on Omega IV at the end of the episode: have Kirk convince the Yangs to spare the Kohm civilians in that village.

The victorious Yangs are all set to give the last Kohms the Numbers 31 treatment, which is what they usually do when they overrun a Kohm community. Of course, Kirk is horrified by this, and he manages to use arguments involving the Yang “holy words” to convince the Yangs to be merciful instead. “Your own holy words say that every person is equally precious! Every person! That includes the Kohms too! If you really mean it, it includes the Kohms too! They’re no threat to you anymore! Did you fight for so long just for a chance to do to them what they tried to do to you? If so, how are you any better than them? Your own holy words claim to be for all people! Your own holy words say that all people are more alike than they are different, and all people are capable of appreciating the gift of freedom! If that’s true, then your holy words are for the Kohms too! That’s why the Kohm lords were so threatened by you, because they were afraid of what would happen if the Kohm people heard those powerful, good words! Tell the Kohms about your holy words!”

So Cloud Williams agrees to make a merciful and peaceful settlement with the “last of the Kohm places,” let it integrate peacefully into Yang society with no further bloodshed and no abuse inflicted or spoils taken. And then Kirk says “If you mean your words of freedom, your work didn’t end today, it’s just starting. Build good seaworthy boats that can cross the ocean, and send people to the Kohms across the sea, so they can hear your words of freedom too! The words of your ancestors are for them too! You’d never be able to conquer them, but they can hear your words!”

[reddrobins]

of coffee cups + criminals - two [j.todd]

TW: violence

ONE - THREE

[Y/N] stood statue-like in her apartment living room. Since hanging up on Jason, not another word had been uttered. 

Sionis had finally moved from his spot, now opting to move around her kitchenette. Her eyes remained glued on the criminal before her.

“So,” The Black Mask finally spoke, “Miss… [L/N], is it?”

Of course, [Y/N] comprehended his words, but fear disabled her ability to reply. 

The masked man gazed expectantly upon her, waiting for her response. Roman chucked to himself, it seemed that his confrontations always started out this way. Approaching her, he stood within an arm's length, eyebrows raised in waiting.

“Well?” He drawled out, clearly bored, it seemed to [Y/N] that he had done this more than once.

“Yes.” Her voice was barely above a whisper and she feared that maybe she had said it in her head. That was until Roman clapped his hands together, seemingly  happy with her answer.

“Wonderful,” He sauntered back to the kitchen area, gloved fingers lingering on the countertops, “I have to say, we did have some difficulty tracking you.” 

As the words sank in, she watched as he took - what she assumed to be - a phone out of his jacket pocket. 

Curiosity getting the better of her, [Y/N] let out a hushed, “What?”

Sionis, to be frank, found her quite humorous. When he usually came to set a record straight, the sorry Gothamite he encountered was often hostile, whipping out whatever protective items they had. [Y/N]’s reaction was vastly different from any one he had come into contact with thus far.

“Oh yes,” He started, all the while scrolling through the files Mr. Li had sent him. “[Y/N] [L/N], 21 years old, originally from Metropolis…” Sionis looked up from his phone, he smirked at her, “Fan of the Man of Steel I presume?” 

[Y/N] swallowed the fear rising in her throat as Roman continued to lazily look at her information. She stood as still as she possibly could, but her mind was racing. Millions of thoughts as to how to escape, how to run, how to get to Jason, swarmed her head.

An annoyed sigh followed by a slam shook her out of her thoughts. “So much information on you, yet so little telling me what I want to hear.” Sionis brought a hand to his face, pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance. It was unlike his informants to have this little confirmation on [Y/N]’s allies, it was as if he couldn't connect her to anyone.

Then, “Look-” He started, walking towards her once more, “You seem like an upstanding girl, my men reported that you make a damn good cup of coffee,”

He continued his monologue, but [Y/N] had tuned out. Of course - she thought - Of-fucking-course. Literally just her luck that the only reason for the shop to be busy was through the workings of the criminal underworld.

A harsh grip brought her back to the situation. The Black Mask had his clothed fingers wrapped around her forearm, squeezing with enough force to bruise. “Well!?”

[Y/N] looked at him, confusion clear on her face, “...huh?” 

Roman all but growled,fingers tightening their hold, “I’m sorry dear, I didn't take you for an incompetant fool.” 

Surprised at his newfound hostility, she tried to pull away - only angering Sionis further. “Now, I am going to ask again. What do you know about the Red Hood?”

The Red Hood.

She knew of the infamous vigilante, of course - all of Gotham did. 

“I-I- I don't know, just, he’s like,” [Y/N] sputtered for an answer, unsure what to say to keep Roman at ease, “He works with the Batman! I know that…” 

Unfortunately, this was not what Roman wanted to hear. “I know that, you idiot!” He grit out, throwing [Y/N] from his hold. The girl stumbled back, nearly falling to the floor. She braced herself onto her knee, keeping her from falling forward.

The Black Mask stalked towards her crouched form and gripped her chin, forcing her gaze to be on him. He gave her a sickening smile, “Let me rephrase the question for you, and this time give me a competent response.”

Roughly releasing her face, he stepped away and took the switchblade out of his pocket once more. “What do you know about the Red Hood…”

Helplessly, [Y/N] began to protest, “That’s the same questio-”

Roman waved the blade back and forth, tutting at the girl before him, “Tsk, I didn’t finish. What do you know about the Red Hood, personally?”

[Y/N] didn't fail to hear the implication in his question. He phrased it as though the two had history, as though [Y/N] and this Red Hood were in cahoots with one another. 

“I’m telling you,” She pleaded, “I don't know him. I-I don't know who you think I am, but I’ve never even met this guy!” 

At that, the Black Mask scoffed, rolling his piercing eyes, and began to pace. “So…” He hissed out angrily, “So you’re telling me that, this-” Roman shoved his phone towards [Y/N]’s face, a picture bright on the screen. “Isn't you?”

It took a second for her eyes to focus on the screen in the dim apartment. But even without pure vision, [Y/N] already knew the answer. She could immediately recognize the picture.

It was on the corner street near Robinson Park. It was ‘their’ spot. When she got off of work at 4:00, Jason would meet her there, the two walking home together. 

The image displayed her, bag slung on her shoulder, tiredly waiting for Jason to show.

[Y/N]’s throat was dry, but knew a response was expected, pushing through - she squeaked out a small, “No.”

Roman narrowed his eyes, “No?” He then laughed, the sound eerily deep and stunning, “‘No’ she says!” 

In a second, he towered over [Y/N], stained cafe apron clutched in his fist, pulling her up towards him. “Do you think this is a joke? Think I’m here on a friendly visit?”

[Y/N] shook her head frantically, pulling her head as far back as possible, “N-No! No, I mean, Yes, yes that's me but no - no I don't think it's a joke.”

Sionis loosened his hold, now leaving [Y/N] at an arm's length from him. Just when she began to think she was out of the woods, the silver butterfly knife made its true appearance. The gangster held it in front of him, pointing the sharp tip towards [Y/N]’s chest.

“I’m done with the games.” Was all he uttered. 

Unsure of what to say, the terrified girl stayed silent. This apparently was on the list of ‘ways to piss off the Black Mask’. Her lack of response elicited another groan from Roman, thus annoying him to the point of no return.

Raising the blade, he traced her jawline - not hard enough to cut, only to instill fear. “You have one of two options, you either spill what you know about the Hood or…”

The smile that appeared on his face let [Y/N] know that no, she didn't really have an option here.

“I spill your guts.”

It was a lie, but she didn't know that. Roman knew that she meant far more to him alive than dead. They had already established that the deal was a life for a life. The Black Mask wasn't stupid, he knew who he was making business with, he knew not to fuck this one up.

[Y/N] however, was unaware of this promise. Upon hearing the threat, she let out a strangled sob, a feral cry of helplessness. There was no way she would be getting out alive, she didn't know a single thing about this hooded vigilante.

“Please!” tears now flowed freely down her face, “I promise you, I don't know anything about him. Just let me be.” Backing up, [Y/N] tried to put as much distance between the two, “I won’t tell anyone you were here. I- I’ll just go in my room and act like nothing happened. Please, I promise.”

Though [Y/N]’s whimpering brought immense joy to the masked villain, Roman had heard enough. He was running on a time constraint and if he wasn't to deliver the package within the night, the Red Hoodlum wouldn't be taken care of.

“You had your chance,” Sionis nodded to the shadows, and to [Y/N]’s surprise, out walked two men. How she hadn't noticed them before, beats her - but here they were in all their large and intimidating glory. “I’d like you to meet my men, Miss [L/N]. Rick, Leon-” He lazily acknowledged the two, “Please grab the girl and bring her up to the roof. Our ride awaits.”

As the two men stalked towards her, [Y/N] silently debated her options. One being she lets the Mask take her and she dies, and two, she makes a run for it and she dies… probably. Either option seemed like a loss and so with all her common sense left back in Metropolis, she made a beeline to the door.

Unsurprisingly, the three felons didn't seem at all phased by this fruitless attempt at evasion. Roman didn't so much as have to jerk his head towards her fleeting form for the two large goons to get the memo. 

Almost at unhuman-like speed, the largest man, Rick, grabbed hold of [Y/N], easily pulling her further from the safety of the door. With minimum effort, he twisted her struggling form into a headlock, both arms braced around her upper body. 

[Y/N] clawed at the man's vice lock, doing everything in her power to gain control. If she learned anything from her years in Gotham, it was that in situations like these, the one thing you need to survive is control. 

Alas, it seemed as though tonight was anything but controllable for [Y/N]. ‘And for what?’ She found herself thinking, ‘All because of a stupid fucking vigilante she doesn't even know?’ Normally, she was not one to get angry, but after a moment of introspection, she then realised how fucked her situation was.

Resorting to the last possible tactic, [Y/N] threw out every ounce of hesitance in her body and bit down onto Ricks arm. Maybe it was in pure shock, or just plain disgust, but Rick immediately uncurled his arms, freeing [Y/N] from his hold.

With no time to gloat at her self defense skills, [Y/N] once more raced to the door, already feeling the sense of safety at her fingertips.

But like all good things, this quickly came to an end.

Right as her hand gripped the door knob, the cool metal slipped from her grasp, a rough tug pulling her back. On instinct, she brought her hand up to her head - the source of the painful yank. Someone had pulled her back by her hair, the stinging pain slowly spreading about her head.

Before she could even wonder who the perpetrator was, Sionis’ stygian face came into view. This time, he feigned a look of sorrow, though an obvious hint of pleasure shone through. “Look, I really didn't want to have to do this, but you’re not making my life a whole lot easy.”

[Y/N] didn't have a chance to question what ‘this’ was. That was until the brass-knuckled fist made contact with her temple.

-

Jason knew something was wrong when she hadn't picked up the first three tries. Though he had not totally let her into his past, [Y/N] knew enough to pick up on his anxious tendencies.

It was an unspoken code in their relationship. If someone didn't pick up within three calls, without prior reason, it was expected of the other to call the GCPD. Or, in Jason's case- The Red Hood.

After her abrupt hang up, Jason had gone back to his safe house, deciding it would be better to track [Y/N]’s cell rather than worry the whole night.

It was now thirty past midnight, almost an hour since her last call. Jason, though he wanted to, didn't immediately jump into action as the tracer was pinning [Y/N]’s phone location to be in her home. 

‘Maybe she fell asleep?’ Jason thought in a sorry attempt to calm his worries. ‘Highly unlikely,’ He retorted to himself, of course, it was a common occurrence to be his own worst enemy.

His anxieties finally getting the best of him, he re-dawned the scarlet helmet and headed out the door, not without strapping a few extra guns onto his person.

Jason had only set up this safe house when he and [Y/N] had started dating. She lived closer to the Narrows, as a result of cheap rent and close distance to the coffee shop. But Jason, who mostly dealt with the Diamond district and sometimes Amusement Mile, couldn't have been farther from [Y/N]. So, using up some of the money he had nabbed off of Cobblepot’s latest (terminated) heist, he purchased a small storage location just a block from her complex.

It had only taken Jason ten minutes to arrive at her apartment, the benefit of having a grappling gun. Before even entering the door, Jason knew something was wrong.

Normally, when he came to visit late a night, he could see light seeping out from under the door crack. Tonight, however, it was jet black. Opting to pick the lock instead of acting on his urge to kick down the door, Jason silently toed into the room. 

The silence only confirmed his thoughts. 

Even in the depths of night, [Y/N]’s house was not quiet. Music, TV chatter, a podcast even, just something was always playing. The eerie stillness shook him to his core, his anxiety spiking the further he crept into her home. Upon brief inspection, he was able to deduct that she had been home… but not alone.

Several pairs of shoeprints littered the floor. He could easily recognise her’s, the small curves in between the outline - definitely [Y/N]’s boots. But he struggled with the three others. It was not that [Y/N] didn't have any friends, she had many - but they were back in Metropolis, surely they wouldn't show up at midnight at random.

Jason scrunched his eyes closed under the mask. Leave it to him to be the one whose girlfriend disappears. Comparison crept back into his head, “Dick’s never lost Barbara, Tim and Steph are always together… Even Bruce can contact Selina when needed…” 

The ugly thought of ‘WHY ME’ was plastered behind his eyes, but he shook it off. [Y/N] was his top priority right now, not his own insecurities.

Accepting that this may be bigger than his detective skills, (Jason had always considered himself more of a fighter) he fished something out of his leather jacket. Entering a number he thought he never would, he connected the phone to his coms.

“Hey, it's me…” A breath, then, “I, I think I might need your help on this one.”

[valkyriesryde]

Shut Up

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Platonic!?Reader

Summary: Exams at the SHIELD academy are coming up and with that members of the Avengers have come to observe the next potential heroes. Some are more promising than others.

Requested by @idk123906​

Word Count: 2k

A/N: it should be known my life is basically just uni and My Hero Academia at the moment so writing about someone with powers I was like finally my time has come even though I literally write for Marvel but yea i don’t know what happened here but enjoy

What should I have for dinner?

I need to work on my left hook.

This is pointless, I know all of this already.

I shouldn’t be here, I should be up in the big leagues already.

Why the fuck is she staring at me?

God she’s so annoying.

Her combat skills are awful. She’s going to lose.

You stood at the edge of the mat, your fists by your side and your knees bent ready to leap forward if need be.

I’m going to destroy her.

Your opponent stared back at you from the otherside of the mat. He smirked, almost as if he was looking forward to the fight even though it was nearing the end of the training, this had to be at least his fifth sparring match, it was your sixth and final one.

“You’re going down,” he growled.

This will be a short one.

Your shoulders laxed for a moment at the voice. Not because it relaxed you, but because it was the nail in the coffin. Having the voice of the Black Widow in your head telling you she knows you’ll lose is never very motivating. 

It was the second to last week of training at the new SHIELD academy and there was so much tension in the air that it could be cut with a knife. Exams were the end of next week and nobody knew what the practical was going to be like.

There were no friends left, sure the cliques still moved in groups together, but once they stepped onto the mats it was you vs them no matter who you versed.

The final week also meant that sessions were being supervised by the best of the best. Natasha Romanoff a.k.a Black Widow had been present every day so far, today Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes and Sam Wilson were all present along with her.

They’d be here all day, watching, observing, even taking notes every now and then. And you had to spend the entire day listening to what they really thought about your fellow classmates as well as yourself. All thanks to your own powers of telepathy. You blocked it out mainly, or tried to at least, wearing headphones or focusing your mind on specific sounds and voices. Sometimes it wasn’t easy to ignore and sometimes it was tactical to hear what people were thinking around you.

Right hook

You dodged the attack as your feet moved swiftly to the side and you ducked under his swing. He always planned his moves in his head.

What the fuck?! Playing hard to get huh bet she can’t do it twice.

You couldn’t, he swung his leg and kicked you square in the back as you tried to regain your footing. 

She needs to work on her spacial awareness.

A new voice, one you had heard plenty of today. Your gaze peered to the Avengers standing to the side as you turned to your opponent. Natasha was shaking her head as she typed on her tablet. Bucky looked like he’d taken the hit himself as he cringed “rookie mistake”. Sam appeared unfazed. Steve Rogers, his stare was directly on you and it was obvious it was you he was thinking about. So you decided to take his advice.

Looking at the space around you you noticed that even though your opponent had the brute force and his combat far outclassed yours he’d made a mistake. In charging towards you he’d put himself at the edge of the ring. You had space all around you to move and dodge, if you kept him against the outer rim you may have a shot. 

So you moved, you stepped around and he followed your movement to try and read your attack. You kept him at the outer rim.

But he lunged again and then you were scuffling on the ground trying to get him off of you. He out-skilled you, he was stronger and bigger and you didn’t have a chance. 

How’d she get into this program?

You huffed and continued to try and kick him off as you heard Steve’s voice again. A scream and a punch but he’d already swung you out of the ring. You lost. Again. 

She’s not going to make it. - Steve

She’ll never survive. - Bucky

Disappointing really, with that power. - Sam

I wouldn’t want her on my team. - Natasha

You pulled yourself up from the floor, your blood boiling as you cursed yourself and stormed towards your bag, your sessions were done you didn’t exactly feel like sticking around for the last of them to be done. 

“Hey!” The deep voice called after you and your steps stopped as the Steve Rogers came to stand before you in all his glory. “I just wanted to tell you good try out there, you’re not always going to win them but you can learn from them. If you wanted I have some pointers that might help you?” 

You need it.

“Thank you, I appreciate it but I think I’ve got this, I’m fine really,” you answered and tried to step around him but he was just so massive it was hard to avoid hitting his shoulder on the way past. 

Won’t even take help when she obviously needs it

There was three hours until the final exam now. You’d trained every day, into the early hours in the morning in the gym to late night runs around the facility. None of it felt enough when you couldn’t even get out the voices of your peers and teachers saying how you were never going to make it; that you weren’t good enough. Captain America had made an appearance at every session since the first day and his voice was the loudest.

She needs to work on her agility

So you trained your agility that night to prove him wrong.

Her hits are weak

So you went through three punching bags over one night to perfect them. 

Your body was exhausted, your mind was empty after the written exam the day before. The final exam was before you and finally it had been revealed what you would be doing, a fight, one fight, one sparring session, verses the Avengers best hand to hand combat members. 

Clint Barton. Natasha Romanoff. Steve Rogers. Sam Wilson. Bucky Barnes. Three students to each and you were peered with none other than Steve. Even worse, you were his last one. 

Because Steve and Bucky were enhanced they would be wearing restraints that lessened their strength against their opponents. There was a pattern for who they were paired with. Clint was peered with those that were highest in agility skills. Natasha worked with the top three students. Bucky was with the ones who had explosive or dangerous mutated powers. Sam was with the ones who preferred the long tactical fights. Steve was classed with the ones who had strength mutated powers...except you, you should have been with Clint or Sam but you were peered with Steve and you had no idea why. 

You’d avoided all of the heroes for the past week, the closer they got the louder their voice was and you couldn’t deal with the hit to your mental state or motivation at a time like this. There as no avoiding them now though. 

Saving the easiest for last, he’s getting lazy. - Bucky

I can’t believe I have to stick around for this, it’ll be over by the time I reach the door. - Sam

I wonder if she uses it during combat? - Steve

You tilted your head at him but shook it off. It was well known what all of your powers were. It was also known how difficult it was to use telepathic powers in combat, you weren’t like Scarlett Witch, you couldn’t get inside someone’s head you could only hear their voices and even then if their guard was up sometimes it was hard.

Shake hands. Step back. The bell rings and Steve doesn’t attack. 

I haven’t seen her hit first.

He wants you to? 

Don’t drag this out for the fun of it you idiot. - Natasha.

That was it. Your blood boiled and your anger took over. You charged for Steve but he dodged you easily until you were leaping onto his bent leg to hoist yourself over his shoulders and to his other side, an elbow between his shoulder blades to send him away from you. 

Why doesn’t she do that in training?

“Because no one here has the same stance as you do.” You bite back at him and he loses his focus for a second, just enough for you to send a kick his way but not long enough for him not to catch your leg afterwards. 

“So you do use your power during combat then,” he smiled. God just get it over with, if you didn’t want this job so fucking bad you’d let him beat you immediately but you had to prove yourself. You had to prove your worth to him, to the rest of the Avengers and to all your classmates that actually you did deserve to be here. You had every right to be here just like everyone else. 

The two of you went back and forth for what felt like hours but was only a couple minutes, even with the restraints Steve still hit hard. He didn’t give you an opening, not one that you could find, he was too quick, at this point you were just running out the clock...too bad there’s no timer. 

Can you communicate back?

You shook your head, to answer his question and it gave you time to try and catch your breath. 

You really want this? You’ve improved a lot this past week.

Your scowl was ever prominent on your face as his comment reminded you of every fucking, you landed a punch, comment, then a kick to his left side that was left open, that came from him and his friends. 

Do you only hear your opponents thoughts?

“No.” Steve stood straight, he was sweating, you were both covered in it, your breathing heaving and your voice ice cold towards him.

What the fuck is going on? - Bucky

They didn’t know what you were saying but you kept talking to him and he wasn’t saying a word, they must have guessed you were using your power but this was an exam for christ’s sake you’re meant to be fighting.

“I hear them all, I don’t often have a choice in it,” you told him, you were so close to being done, you didn’t think your body could take it much longer, one more hit and you would be down for the count. 

I’m sorry. I’ve been underestimating you this entire time. 

Your eyes blurred. You used to look up to the Captain, you used to want to work alongside him, to follow in his footsteps but you weren’t so sure anymore. He and his friends took one look at you and decided you weren’t cut out for it. You let out a laugh as you and Steve went back to throwing attacks and attempting to dodge one another. This is how villains are made, this is why they say never meet their heroes. 

You can’t go much longer.

You gritted your teeth. FUCK OFF you wanted to yell at him. You were the one with telepathic powers but he was the one reading you. 

You’ve already passed you know. 

“It’s not about passing anymore though.” He quirked an eyebrow as you leaped behind him and caught him in an arm bar. “I deserve to be here.” He didn’t answer you, somehow through pushing and pulling he got out and in the process you were thrown out of bounds. You punched at the ground and groaned, as long as you walk out of this room on your own accord that was okay, then you can go straight to the nurse and pass the fuck out. 

“You do. But you’re not ready to be out there yet.”

Part Two: Vigilante

thank you for reading I hope you enjoyed it!

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[themonkeycabal]

Wandavision Ep 6 Spoilers

No really, spoilers. 

Previously on Wandavision — Wanda told SWORD to shove their drones right straight up their asses, Vision woke up to the reality that his utopian sitcom life was in fact a dystopian hellscape, their children were extremely creepy, and Agnes was being bizarre as hell and super sus. In the real world, Acting Director Dick was a dick, and Darcy and Jimmy welcomed Monica into their sciencey weird-crime-fighting team. Monica also mentioned an aerospace engineer she knows, which some suggest may be the first mention of Reed Richards in the MCU. I have conflicted feelings about the Fantastic Four. Mostly I never liked them. But, I'm open to revising my opinion.

Oh, and also X-Men 'Verse Pietro showed up suddenly and that was fun.

Anyway. the roommate and I tried to sort out a timeline — so Monica unBlips and goes back to work at SWORD three weeks later. AD Dick tells us Wanda stole Vision's body nine days previously. That means, just three weeks ago Wanda was in the middle of a battle, lost her boyfriend, was Snapped, was then unsnapped to fall right into the middle of another battle. Lost THREE additional teammates. And then sometime in the following week found out a shady government agency had Vision's body and she probably went "OH HELL NO". Because that's what I would say. So she goes to SWORD, dents a few doors, takes Vision's body and swans off to New Jersey. Look, she's been through a hell of a lot in the last couple weeks, is what I'm saying. I don't blame her a tiny bit. But, also, I don't think she's entirely behind this.

10-year old boy plus video camera = the 90s. Obnoxious opening credits. But, you know, I kind of liked them (as a one off). WAYYY better than last week's.

It's Halloween, and *sigh* Billy is breaking the fourth wall and narrating to the camera. There's childish twin bickering as you expect, Tommy's the wild and crazy twin, and Billy's the buttoned up twin. And Pietro is passed out on the couch at 4 in the afternoon. Living his best life. He teasingly scares the boys, chases them around, and there's awkward child acting.

Wanda comes down the stairs in the classic Scarlet Witch costume, and says she's a Sokovian Fortune Teller. Sokovia was more wild than I realized.

Genuinely funny flashback to Wanda and Pietro trick-or-treating in Sokovia as kids, 'the year we got typhus'. lol. Was it the fish that gave them typhus? Or was that just a special treat? Wanda doubts this version of events, and Pietro suggests she suppressed the memory due to the trauma. This gives Billy the chance to tell the camera that mom's been weird since uncle Pietro turned up to crash on their couch.

Next it's Vision's turn to appear in the classic Vision costume. Yikes. Wanda thanks him for humoring her, and he says there were no other clothes in his closet and they have a very weird second where he's not playing along and she's not sure what to do, and then he breaks into sitcom character says something about "just kidding, i know how much you love mexican wrestling" like it's a luchador costume, and then there's some super weird flirting. TMI you two.

Meanwhile, Pietro is a large child and the kids love him, of course. So there's that.

Back to Wanda and Vision, she's ready to take the kids out trick-or-treating, but Vision says he can't go, he's on the neighborhood watch and must patrol the streets ever-vigilant for wild gangs of child hooligans who might TP trees. He's gone off-script and it takes Wanda a second to figure out how to play this. She says it's the boys' first Halloween so he has to be there. Pietro breaks up the almost argument and says he can be a father figure-type and he'll help with the boys. Vision's still pretty off-script but Wanda doesn't fight it but looks uncertain, and he goes off to protect the night — or early afternoon.

Pietro is a child hooligan and wants to go do hooligany things with the kids. Wanda says he doesn't have a costume and he grabs Billy and they speed off only to return dressed in classic Quicksilver duds. Well, cheap-looking, thrown together Quicksilver duds. I laughed. The hair. lol. Good one.

Outside in the real world. The Hex field is still kind of glowing red and making bad force field noises. It only started doing that when Wanda got pissed in the last ep. Oh, goody, it's Acting Director Dick. I've learned his name is Hayward. I don't care.

Blah blah Stompy Mc-I'm-In-Charge blah. Monica is not pleased about the whole trying to kill Wanda with a missile while she was talking to her plan. AD Dick just says "now we know who we're dealing with". Um … what? You tried to kill her and her response was to tell you to go away. Yeah, boy, she's a monster.

Darcy is there to helpfully remind AD Dick that Wanda made him look like the fool he is. ILU girl. "Hey, there he is; the guy who almost got murdered by his own murder squad." Jimmy just makes a 'i'm so disappointed in you and your choices' face at him in the background.

I despise characters like Hayward. They are so tedious. Narratively they are there to incite conflict, but given the situation conflict naturally exists, surely there are other ways to bring up/drive that tension without the trope of the government heavy ready to solve the problem with the most extreme amount of force available to him. OH no! Our plucky heroes will have to find a way to save the day and fight the Man! Can they do it? Boring. It's too bad General Talbot went insane and then died; he could probably give tips on How Not To Be That Guy.

Anyway

Hayward wants to know if Darcy works for him and she's like "dunno my dude", Monica claims her, AD Dick says "which one of you is the sassy best friend" and Jimmy's like, that is quite enough Acting Director Not Very Nice Man. "There's no time to diminish your colleagues when you're about to start a war you can't win." AD Dick just wants to take out Wanda so the whole nightmare ends. Monica's like um, we literally do not know what's going on. Like, for real we have no clue. So that might not, in fact, end the nightmare, Director Murder Britches.

They argue a lot and Director Dick goes off the rails. Dude's like more unhinged than seems warranted. Unless he's just so embarrassed that he pissed himself when Wanda returned his murder drone to him, he's decided SHE MUST BE DESTROYED FOR THE GOOD OF … NEW JERSEY AND MY SOILED UNDERWEAR OR SOMETHING. 

"Captain Rambeau, you are an impediment to this mission!" Oh no! He's gonna tell her all about how hard it was to survive in a post-blip world, all those lucky blipped don't know what it was like! You just can't understand! Monica tells him not to use that as an excuse to be a coward. I'm so bored with this scene. Let me guess, the trio will have to go behind his back to save the day.

"Maybe it's a good thing you weren't here with your mother died. Because, clearly you don't have the stomach for this job." … non-sequitur much? Or is he saying she would have inherited the Director-ship (which should probably not be how that sort of agency works, let's be real). Is this scene five hours long, or does it just feel that way?

The Dick banishes the trio from his base.

"Hayward is way over-stepping his provisional authority". Jimmy Woo, you're so great. Monica says he's up to something. Yeah a tactical nuke and murder. Clearly he doesn't want to actually solve the problem, he just wants the problem to go away with a big show of macho explosions and whatnot. I suspect he might be in over his head, like he was not meant to be Acting Director, let alone Director. Also, he's a boring cliche stereotype and I loathe it.

JIMMY! I legit did not see that coming. He just pure hauls off and clocks one of the soldiers escorting them off the base, to a transport truck or something. Monica seems just as surprised for a second but then she's like "hell yeah!" and jumps in. Darcy sort of stands back and watches. lol. "Why didn't anyone tell me the plan?"

Oh look, it's my shipping container! They put the soldiers in there. Guys, it was for Hayward. Come on.

The trio disguise themselves with ponchos, which is a big step up from the usual MCU disguise of "baseball hat". That was a good bit in Ant-man and the Wasp "it's not a disguise, it just looks like us at a baseball game" (I watched that like last week. I missed Luis). Anyway …

Back in the sitcom world. The kids are ready for their early afternoon trick-or-treating. They're still talking to the camera. It's so awkward. I'm not a fan. I get it's meant to reproduce the very 90s Nick-era sitcoms and so, you know, it's spot on. Still, though.

Pietro is encouraging and supportive. "Unleash hell, demon spawn!"

Dang there are a lot of kids in that neighborhood. Wasn't Vision wondering last episode why there weren't any kids? Is the program correcting itself?

Wanda tries to test Pietro, asking him about some kid at an orphanage when they were kids. Pietro calls her on it, and says he knows he looks different. Wanda wants to know why that is. He says, "You tell me. I mean, if I found shangra-la, I wouldn't want to be reminded of the past, either." Hmm.

The kids speed off with uncle Pietro. Wanda wanders over to talk to neighbor Herb, who has a g-man earbud in and is clearly part of the neighborhood watch. In the background Pietro is stealing all the candy and smashing pumpkins and spraying the place with silly string. The hijinks are so wacky. Wanda tells Herb maybe Vision can help out with the chaos, and Herb says Vision isn't on duty. Oh no, he lied to her!

Herb goes weird "is there something I can do for you, Wanda? Do you want something changed?" Hmmm.

Elsewhere Vision is wandering the wild streets of Westview. He finds people caught in some type of weird decorating loop, the woman seems trapped but aware.

Commercial time!  What the fuck was that. "Yo-magic! The snack for survivors." No, really, what the fuck.

Night has fallen, the twins and the twins walk the streets. Wanda's making the boys give back all the candy they stole. She says Pietro is a bad influence. He says "I'm just trying to do my part, kay? Come to town unexpectedly, create tension with the brother-in-law, stir up trouble with the rugrats, and ultimately give you grief. I mean, that's what you wanted, isn't it?"

"What happened to your accent?"

"What happened to yours? Details are fuzzy, man. I got shot like a chump in the street for no reason." AHAHAHAHAHAHA! AHAHAHAHAHA! no really AHAHAHAHAAH! Thank you, Pietro! Holy shit, perfect. That's some delicious shade. I expect to see this gif'd fifteen different ways when I load tumblr today.

"Next thing I know, I heard you calling me. I knew you needed me."

The kids interrupt. And now all of a sudden Tommy can zoom. Character development!

Everyone is so careful to give Wanda what she wants. Why? She's not cruel. Who wants to keep her pacified? And whoever it is cannot possibly be pleased with AD Dick messing things up. Assuming it's an outside or outside-ish force/entity, of course. I mean, I don't think she's doing this entirely, she might be the battery powering it, but despite her thing last episode to get SWORD to leave her alone, she does seem a little confused about the where, why, and how things are going.

"Don't go past Ellis Avenue." Just a kid thing or a boundary of the sitcom control world?

In the real world, our heroes are sneaking through a tent city and into the server room. The scene with Pietro and Wanda discussing his accent is playing in the background. Darcy seems put-out that Pietro was recast. lol. "He brought the wrong face."

Darcy hacks into Hayward's devices. "Hayward figured out a way to look through the boundary." "And he didn't share it with the group." I don't like Hayward. 

Something is blipping on the map on the computer. Jimmy asks if it's Wanda, but Darcy says "it's tracking the decay signature of vibranium". So Vision. Monica wants to know why Hayward is tracking Vision. Well, I'd super like to know what SWORD was doing with Vision in the first place, because they weren't just storing him, they were doing something. So …

Jimmy notices that there are other dots, the ones closest to Vision, who are other residents. Jimmy says the ones near the edge of town are barely moving.

Back to Vision. He's found a cul-de-sac to patrol. Everybody's frozen in place, the street lights flicker. Eerie. They're all dressed for Halloween. Does this mean the field is shrinking, or the effects spreading and so it's closing in, slowing and then freezing people who were earlier moving about just fine? Vision is unaffected by this whatever it is. He turns himself into himself and flies off, up above the town. part of the town is dark, and part alive with voices and laughter.

He spots a car at the edge of town. It's Agnes. She seems frozen-ish, but when he asks what she's doing there, she says "Town Square Scare. Where is it?" all robotic like. Vision helpfully tries to give directions. lol. "Took a wrong turn, got lost" she says.

Vision touches her head and she wakes up. "You! You're one of the Avengers. You're Vision. Are you here to help us?" "I am Vision. I do want to help. But, what's an Avenger?"

Hmm. Well, I guess he did say last week that he couldn't remember anything before Westview.

"Am I dead?" she asks. "No, why would you think that?" "Because you are."

What was news coverage after the Snap like, do you suppose? I mean, ridiculous, of course. But, like, I think they had bigger problems then wondering about snapped/dead Avengers, didn't they? Well, maybe not. "WHERE ARE AVENGERS TO HELP US?" or "HOW DARE THE AVENGERS NOT HELP US!" "TOTALLY THIS IS ON THE AVENGERS!" "WE'D ALL BE DEAD WITHOUT THE AVENGERS!" "NUHUH! BOO AVENGERS!" "EXCEPT VISION WHO DIED HEROICALLY, WE ALL LIKE THAT AVENGER!" "TONY STARK AND PEPPER POTTS SHARE THE DECORATING TIPS THAT TRANSFORMED THEIR RUSTIC RESTORATION PROJECT INTO A CHARMING FAMILY HOME".

Agnes starts screaming "Dead" at Vision. She's not coping well. Vision says he's going to try and reach outside town and try to figure this all out. "How? No one leaves. Wanda won't even let us think about it." I SUSPECT YOU, AGNES! Why would Wanda keep everybody trapped and miserable? I could see if she did it on accident, but this implies she's purposefully hurting people. I don't buy it. Agnes, again, seems to be in the right place at the right time to make Vision doubt Wanda. You're a very suspicious character, Agnes.  

She starts to laugh. "All is lost." Vision touches her had and she resets to sitcom Agnes. Somehow she can move again, she turns the car around on Ellis Ave and heads back into town. So, that answers that.

Vision walks across the Eillis Ave to the field beyond.

Meanwhile, Darcy continues to hack. Monica gets a text and says "that's it! My way back into the Hex will be here in an hour." Jimmy's all ready to boost a ride to take her to meet her aerospace buddy. But, Darcy says, nope. Can't do it. Monica's been through the Hex twice, and it's rewritten her cells. "It's changing you." Monica is undaunted. "I know what Wanda's feeling and I won't stop until I help her." Alrighty then.

Jimmy's finally going to get to hotwire a car! But wait, Darcy's not going with them. AD Dick has something hidden behind one last firewall. Darcy thinks it's big and can help them. She's going to find it.

I don't think Jimmy had to hotwire that humvee. It just started right up. Motorpool, pfft - they always leave the keys.

Back in Westview. Halloween continues at Town Square. Pietro asks Wanda where she was hiding all those kids. Whu? Says Wanda. "I assume they were all just sleeping peacefully in their beds. No need to traumatize beyond the occasional holiday cameo, amiright?" What is Pietro. "Hey don't get me wrong, you've handled the ethical considerations of this scenario as best you could. Families and couples stay together. Most personalities aren't far from what's underneath. People got better jobs. Better haircuts for sure."

"You don't think it's wrong?"

"Are you kidding me? I'm impressed. It's a pretty big leap from giving people nightmares and shooting red wigglywoos out your hands." No, really, what is Pietro? "How'd you even do all this?" Hmmm.

"I don't know how I did it. I only remember feeling completely alone. Empty. Just endless nothingness." She looks back at Pietro and for a second he's dead Pietro. Poor Wanda.

Darcy continues to hack Hayward's systems. Cataract classified weapons something something. They're still tracking Vision. Who continues his walk across the field and comes to the hex. He tries to push through it. Looks painful. SWORD rolls out to go overreact at him. He makes it through the barrier, kind of. It's a struggle.

Hayward standing there looking like a jackass "he really does want out, doesn't he?" Like he’s just amused by this turn of events, or watching a lab rat try to get out of the lab. 

Darcy's standing behind watching all of this. Bits of Vision sort of fly off and back into the Hex. Darcy says "oh no!" and runs towards him, screaming for them to help him. Way to give away your sneaky hiding, girlfriend.

In Westview. Billy looks up, he can hear what's going on outside. "I hear daddy in my head. He's in trouble."

Vision calls for help, while SWORD prioritizes arresting Darcy. Phil Coulson would never have behaved like this. Boo to SWORD. Vision is dissolving. It's kind of gross and sad.

Wanda asks where Vision is, and Pietro interrupts "Don't sweat it, sis. It's not like your dead husband can die twice." Wanda wallops him with some red wigglywoos.

Billy sees soldiers and thinks Vision is dying. Wanda stops everything and makes a big red boom. The Hex appears to be expanding. Whoops, now you've done it AD Dick. He runs away like the brave brave guy he is. They leave Darcy handcuffed to a jeep. "Are you serious right now?"

The Hex overtakes Vision and then Darcy. Trapped soldiers become clowns, and we're in the circus. Well, SWORD seems like a circus, so Wanda's not wrong. I'm pretty sure Jimmy and Monica made it, but sadly the bravest Director who ever braved also escaped. He deserved to be a circus clown. Better luck next week, Wanda.

Credits.

Well, I just don't know anymore.

Hayward doesn't care about Wanda, except where I think because of this someone will figure out what he was doing to Vision's body. And Vision is ultimately the thing he cares about in all this. I hope Wanda drops a house on him.

Hmmm.

Quit suggesting I watch Age of Ultron next, Disney. It’s not happening. 

[cooltrainererika]

A Star Wars Noob’s ideas for fixing the Disney sequels

Okay so just to get this out there, because it won’t leave my mind.

So I’ve been binging on SW lately and the sequels only annoy me more and more by the day. So just wanted to throw my character ideas out into the world. Focusing on characters because I like writing characters way more than plot. Hopefully if I ever actually write this thing, or even somehow pitch it to someone with the right connections to animate it with the actors as voice actors, this wouldn’t have gone viral. But since no one looks at my blog it probably won’t lol. Hopefully.

But just in case, I’ll say that this will probably contain spoilers for a story which may or may not exist by the time you read this.

I’ve deliberately been trying to avoid as much emotional spoilers and normal spoilers as I can before the sequels despite the temptation, so sorry if some stuff is a bit off. Augh I hope I can get the time to watch the full OT and PT soon. I was too tired from hiking when I watched SW4 and I now really wish my dad didn’t show me when I was half-asleep.

Rey: Rainbow of possibilities; Cynical Scavenger, Adventure-seeking Audience Surtogate Geek, or Lawful Good to the core Paladin Padawan with a personal grudge, and may be descended from a family line, maybe not, but currently most likely a Skywalker by blood. Story and other character arcs change dramatically depending on which route chosen.

Finn: Stoic soldier man learns power of friendship, finds meaning of life, causes Stormtrooper mutiny, probably becomes a Jedi and second main character and hooks up with Rey. “What‘s a joke?”. Awkward dork and stunted socially but doing his best. May instinctively find it hard to disobey orders. He may be the one wanting to find his family; but that’s dropped soon enough to focus on what’s ahead. 

(Alternatively: Proud warrior guy who acts like a stereotypical North Korean soldier who finds himself outside the First Order, learns power of friendship etc. The rest is the same)

Poe Dameron: What we Japanese people call The Aniki. The funny charismatic ace pilot who keeps everyone sane, overall bro. Wholesome but a bit rough, that guy you would want to share a beer with. But within that easygoing nature burns a hotblooded, determined, dutiful streak, and an even stronger snarky streak. The one with the social skills. Loves his droid like his son though Cynical!Rey and Finn find that initially kind of stupid/strange. 

Kylo Ren/Ben Solo: Appears to be yet another quietly imposing Star Wars villain with added edgelord factor, but actually a mentally unstable, borderline yandere berserker of a man crushed under the weight of a legacy, with a horrifying inferiority complex, identity issues, and an unhealthy obsession with familial honor, constantly stuck between Dark and Light. Despite his high rank, basically the First Order’s attack dog. Usually has the emotional maturity of a 16-year-old, if not younger. If anyone is, he’s the damsel in distress of this story.

Luke Skywalker: Cuddly sunshine headmaster sage doing his best, has been on many adventures before that are hidden ads to future Lucasfilm projects. May have gone to search for answers as to what is causing recent events, or is still present at the beginning. May survive at the end. He could be anywhere from kind of jaded but at his core still that sweet optimist, to Basically Uncle Iroh, to can-literally-summon-Porgs-by-whistling/Space Sage Mr. Rogers.

Han Solo: General of the Republic Armed Forces or courier who decided military life just wasn’t for him and now delivers important messages through still unstable areas of the New Republic, a war hero, and a dad doing his best. Wants to hold hope but may have at least outwardly given up on Ben, with Poe filling in the void. Has gone clean from his life of crime and still married 30+ years strong with Leia. He would be the one who is the closest to Poe if he’s still in the military and Leia is a Jedi, with Poe being seen as his likely successor. He might die at the end of 8? Maybe Hamill and Carrie would somehow talk him into sticking around past 7? He might still die in 7?

(Side note: I wish we could have seen Old Harrison Ford in a military casual coat-cape. He would have looked awesome in it. I mean no one would really complain that he plays fast and loose with the dress code if there even is one, he’s Han freakin’ Solo and he gives no f*cks.)

Leia Organa-Solo: Preferably a Jedi Knight, leader while he’s away if he’s away as well as their tactician, or senator considering her personality; maybe have basically what Colin Trevorrow planned for her (I mean… why not just use CGI at this point? They’ve done it before. I’m sure Carrie wouldn’t have wanted her swan song to be such a passive role either), with her bond with Luke being a major factor and us actually being able to see it in practice. May have outwardly given up on her son as well, but still is at the end of the day a mom doing her best. Basically a strong, smart lady like how she’s always been.

Chewbacca: How he always is, but he plays more of a role than basically the guy bussing the cast around, an active combat role definitely. Han’s second in command and maybe fellow dad. Possibly the part-time chaperone of the mess that is the new main duo. Also was Ben’s first friend, and you bet there will be drama here.

Lando Calrissian: Business mogul who probably helps the heroes out, maybe by selling them stuff and using his many connections to get information. And/or he’s basically an economic diplomat for the Republic. Has known Ben since he was a child and may have snuck him on too many joyrides without telling Leia, to her chagrin and Han’s amusement. 

Grand Admiral Armitage Hux: Basically how he was in SW7. Calculating, manipulative, coldhearted, intelligent, and ruthless, the brains to Kylo’s brawn. Son of former Imperial officers, killed his own father to get where he is. Gives no f*cks, except when he goes full ham. Maybe even he goes cold and pale if Kylo starts getting angry, just to show how terrifying he can be, but I also like the idea of him being one of two people who can manipulate Kylo out of a tantrum and not end up a pile of flesh or choked to death. 

Captain Phasma: How she is in supplemental material probably. A walking chrome machine of merciless death. Probably not very talkative, and probably does not take defectors lightly. She may defect at the end or not depending on how truly evil she’s portrayed to be, but I’m thinking she’s likely this cruel disciplinarian who expects complete and utter, machine-like obedience to the end, and Finn flinches at the mere mention of her, though she herself is equally as extremely loyal to the cause.

Snoke: A mysterious being, the likes of which are not of this galaxy. Probably some kind of ancient eldritch abomination who can torment vulnerable minds with an untraceable curse. Not your average Sith, and despite how it may seem it may not be connected to them at all… Or perhaps it is. Or perhaps it itself serves a larger master. It wants to use Kylo Ren for… something. Just what it is is what Luke has been trying to find out for years.

Knights of Ren: Idea borrowed from Thor Skywalker (check him out on YouTube!); possibly a military cult of Sith/Vader worshippers who see Ben as the second coming of Vader, and have aligned themselves with Snoke. Probably basically Kylo’s personal guard and troops. Or possibly directly liked to whatever otherworldly entit(ies?) Snoke is, not being of this galaxy themselves.

Anakin Skywalker: Determined grandpa doing his best for his kids, grandkid(s), and the galaxy. Doesn’t appear often, but plays a major role in the story; maybe he’s the one who led Rey to his lightsaber, and maybe he advises Luke while training Rey, or secretly follows Kylo, trying to speak to him but unable to be seen or heard by him. He’d be the one who ultimately convinces Ben to return to the light, and to, in an echo of the words Ben heard when he was being impersonated, “finish what I started”.

Rose Tico: A probably relatively new, wide-eyed young recruit in the Republic Military, and maybe seeks revenge on First Order for killing or kidnapping her sister. Not sure if she will be needed, but if there’s room for her she might be interesting. Maybe she’s one of Poe’s friends or part of his squad. She could also be the resident girly girl because there aren’t many of those here. 

Vice-Admiral Amberlyn Holdo: She’s in the Aftermath books, and those seem pretty good, so she’s probably how she is there. A quirky mostly background character that is probably at most there for Han and/or Leia and Ackbar to give commands to and salute back, but most importantly she actually does her job properly, even if she’s still a bit of an odd person. Also Poe knows her and they have a way more amicable work relationship. Also give her something which actually looks like something military personnel would wear. She could even be a legitimately good tactician who comes up with off-the-wall tactics.

(Side note: I heard that she basically has the Star Wars version of Autism, and while I’d appreciate that as an Aspie myself, I’ll also have to say that Autistic people would probably be terrible military leaders due to us not being able to adjust to sudden changes well and our bad communication skills. So yeah, sorry, unless she’s recast to something like, say, a mechanic or logistics or medic or any other more Autistic-friendly job, that’s going to have to go)

Maz Kanada: …Admittedly not sure what to do with her. But she’s more likely to be an acquaintance of Lando before Han, if she doesn’t know both. In fact, Lando may be introduced early alongside her. But she would still have the important role of keeping Anakin’s saber; how she has it, either Lando found it, or basically what was cut from TFA showing that she’s indeed pretty awesome. 

BB-8: BB-8 doesn’t have to change. He’s perfect as he is. Maybe what he can do should be more consistent though. Poe and him are basically Ash and Pikachu, they stick together whenever possible. If Rey or Finn need a droid to tag along and Poe isn’t in the party at the moment, R2 is right there. I once read a fanfic in which BB-8 was actually a droid Luke made for Ben and I liked the idea… though it probably would be a bit of an unnecessary detail in practice.

R2-D2 and C3P0: They’re basically business as usual. They would still have that boke-tsukkomi dynamic they had going on, sometimes with the added childlike cuteness of BB-8 in the mix. If there’s any extra time left for comic relief scenes, or if they’re sent on some kind of mission together, I can see these three messing around doing their thing (or rather, BB being childlike, cute and curious, Threepio being overly nervous, and Artoo being too old for this sh*t and/or BB’s cool uncle/older brother) being both cute and hilarious.

Also Worldbuilding stuff will be featured at the bottom

Elaboration on the “big four” of the sequel cast:

Rey: Aged 19, speaks with Daisy Ridley’s normal accent, not RP (I mean really, her accent isn’t that hard to understand). A whole rainbow of possibilities with this lady, though many don’t realize it. I might be leaning towards her being Luke’s daughter, though her being Just Rey may also be interesting, and her still being a descendant of Palpatine or the main villain could also have potential, though if Finn is a Jedi I don’t think there’s any need for her parents to be nobody. But the three main routes I can think of for her are these three: Cynical!Rey, a Rey with a backstory identical to the canon Rey from her abandonment onwards, Fangirl!Rey, a sort of estimation of a dorky female Star Wars nerd in-universe and the most lighthearted start out of the three, and Padawan!Rey, a Rey who is already Luke’s Padawan at his academy. Maybe making her starting point less crushingly bleak and Fangirl!Rey could work, but it might dilute both ideas, and that characterization might be a bit too similar to ANH Luke. 

As is apparent, Cynical!Rey, is, well, cynical. She’s strong and independent, but extremely distrusting, on-edge, and not used to friendly interaction. Think Female SW4 Han Solo but even more antisocial and probably not even bothering with the bravado, and basically with Anakin’s upbringing except she doesn’t even have a loving mother like Anakin did. Fangirl!Rey was my initial idea but I’m starting to become less partial to it because of the aforementioned similarity to ANH Luke, but my idea was she’s basically Harry Potter, living with stepparents who hate her, or she’s still used as basically child labor but her conditions are nowhere near as bad as Cynical Rey’s, and she would have grown up on stories about the Rebels and the Jedi and everything else in the past movies, collecting every single bit of memorabilia she can get her hands on. If one wants to go for very lighthearted and slightly meta for SW7 this is the route. Padawan!Rey could go anywhere, but I’m thinking she would basically be our D&D Paladin; ever since Ben Solo went berserk and ran off to join the First Order, she’s become very protective of her fellow students and has a really understandable personal grudge against him. She might be the strongest pupil left after the Second Jedi Massacre, and by the end maybe she becomes the successor to headmaster of the academy. It is possible that she was found abandoned on Jakku or Luke’s doorstep, however, so the theme of growing up lonely is there, and because being a Jedi is what has given her meaning in life it means a lot to her. But while I don’t want her parentage to be revealed early if it is Luke, it does raise the massive plot hole of why this was never disclosed to her or to Ben. 

And yes, I did say fellow students and academy. Wiping the new Jedi Order feels really cheap and it makes the whole hopeful Jedi Starting Anew implication that I’m 90% sure the OT ended on feel very pointless. I’d prefer them still being there, though their inclusion would be obviously way more natural in the Padawan Route. This also has tons of marketing potential for Disney, because I wanted to take IRL realism into account; what’s in it for Disney? Maybe potential to expand on other students and Luke’s academy? It could be like a smaller Jedi Hogwarts/Xavier Institute basically. Though the survivors wouldn’t be too numerous; just, like, four at most. Maybe there would be elements of an Avengers/Infinity War/Endgame-esque team movie, even if the rest are a bit out of focus.

I did think maybe the heroes would still go to Ahch-To after SW7 where Luke would have been hiding with his students researching the new threat, but maybe I could have him stay and sort of take a few cues from Harry Potter by introducing the heroes to the world of the Jedi early and giving them a break in the action as they settle in their new homes, so there’s more time to develop the padawan side characters, what the academy is like, and Luke gets to appear in SW7 as well so there can be a OT trio “reunion” (not a reunion in-universe). Though that kind of messes with other parts I want to include like Rey and Finn having to take on Kylo and getting completely whipped because he’s a rampaging madman before having to be saved by Luke. Also Rey getting kidnapped has potential for developing her trust in others, and her and Finn getting a breather moment at the Republic after the heroes and Han regroup would kind of remove a point where that could be easily slotted in the story. It would also require everything before this to be crammed in the first act. 

(Newer edit 5/27/21)  I also like her getting a golden double-bladed saber like many fans depict her. It’s not only awesome looking (because she only gets her own saber at the end of TROS… Why?), but it’s more toys for the moichendise! It fits her starting with a staff, it has more reach, and it would fit Cynical Rey especially for her to have a style centered around keeping as much of herself defended as possible. Watching Battlefront 2 footage has made me think about fighting styles a bit, and if she and Finn are a duo how their styles of combat might compliment each other, especially as their relationship develops (coincidentally she and Finn apparently are a very good combination in BF2). A Cynical Rey would probably contrast the most, with a fighting style based on keeping enemies away, trickery, and defense (a good choice for a blade made of light), maybe a bit wild at first but initially her goal in fighting would be to hold out until there is an opening to get the hell out, only staying to fight if she has no other option. Fangirl Rey wouldn’t really have a fighting style initially, and it’s gonna be very dependent on where her arc goes. Padawan Rey would have the most Prequel Jedi-esque, choreographed style, showing a lot of skill though not quite mastering it and with tons of openings at first. A Cynical Rey may have an uncanny skill to detect suspicious people, which would make her trusting the heroes easier, and though this ability isn’t super strong and is more “a slight gut feeling but it could be nothing” than “human lie detector” it could maybe be honed more. And while not quite wall vision like in BF2 (because wat? Where do they come up with this stuff?), maybe she’s good at detecting people’s presences too. These are very apt ambient skills for someone in her position. Meanwhile, Fangirl!Rey would have probably suspected she had the Force already, and her ambient abilities could be whatever, just rather passive abilities unless trained. 

If she is Luke’s daughter though, that would open up the can of worms of who her mother is. Just making it so that she died before the events of SW7 might seem a bit… unfortunate? I kind of want Luke to have found love sometime (and seriously with how much of a bombshell young Luke was, in addition to him being such a hero, I’m shocked that he never got one. I can see why Mara Jade wanted a piece of that. *wolf whistle*), but then I’d have to figure out how to incorporate her in this already character-dense story without her having cheaply died offscreen. I might be able to think of something? I could always go digging in the dusty pile of old fan theories, I might find something good. Thor Skywalker did hint at her but his story stopped at the end of where SW8 would have. If I do name her Mara there’s probably going to be extra pressure to do something with her. …But I can’t be the only one who thinks that Daisy Ridley kind of looks like Natalie Portman. Then again I’m pretty face-blind. I guess blond hair and blue eye color genes are also recessive traits for Star Wars humans. Though it seems the height genes skipped a generation because she’s actually pretty tall for a woman at 170 cm - I’m sorry what. That’s as tall as the average Japanese man! Holy sh*t Daisy! She only looks a bit small because she’s often depicted with Kylo and Kylo makes everyone not Phasma look diminutive. I guess Ben would get it from Anakin and Han (though he’s still taller than both of them…), so maybe a taller actress would be cast as Mara (?). And despite Rey’s malnourishment in the Cynical route, this actually isn’t that implausible, because stunted growth apparently only happens if children are deprived from gestation to about 2 years of age. 

And again, why wouldn’t Ben know about this? But if this isn’t the Padawan!Rey route (the hardest to incorporate Rey The Actual Skywalker into), maybe Ben took Rey’s assumed death as even more of a reason to burden himself with the entire Skywalker legacy? This would give him a reason to already care about her.

Further edits: According to the Aftermath books, Jakku was a “Lightside Nexus” planet. Maybe this has to do with her powers? (Perhaps she was kept sane by the Force speaking to her on occasion, in dreams or as she lies staring at the ceiling after a long day, showing her the loving life she used to live and unknown to her she will return to someday). Or why she was dropped there? Maybe she was supposed to be living with Lor San Tekka (the old guy Kylo kills at the beginning of TFA), but got lost one day or was kidnapped by bandits to be a scavenger because her small size would have been perfect for getting loot from small spaces? Why not take her back then? This probably is one of the biggest plot knots in the Cynical Rey Skywalker route, alongside who her mother is.  

Small detail lightning round before moving on: I once read a Japanese fic, and in it she mentioned she hates alcohol because she saw how it turned people into monsters. I actually kind of liked this headcanon, and maybe a bit unexpected. Though there’s also the route of her just being too used to it, setting her apart from previous more wholesome protagonists even more.  Also Daisy would have to start hitting the gym and protein shakes because I think her character design evolving from her thin build to a very athletic, Wonder Woman-esque body type would be pretty good in representing her growth as a character, and combined with her height she would be so very badass looking. 

Finn: Probably around 23? Infamous for lost potential, so his backstory is the same. However, I’m thinking that due to his dehumanizing upbringing, he’s a bit robotic and pretty stoic initially, a total opposite to Poe. He doesn’t understand jokes or sarcasm, and now that he’s completely left the life he’s always known, he feels pretty lost. He would basically act like a male Rei Ayanami, though I was going more for Drax at first. Alternatively, he’s a proud warrior type, imagine a stereotypical North Korean/Prussian soldier. He’d be a bit more emotional and probably less cartoonish here (I mean I have compared Star Wars to anime but full-on anime tropes in live action probably looks super corny), and he’s a massive hardass who also doesn’t get sarcasm or jokes and fanatical and would have thought of his fellow soldiers as a collective as his band of brothers and comrades, collectively serving the FO like a smoothly running machine. My initial thought was that after a life of war crimes and the influence a certain pilot whose cell he was guarding who gave him his name, and maybe witnessing the death of a comrade, he had defected from the FO, but I started thinking it would be plausible if he defected from the FO probably by accident. Highly likely to be the second protagonist, if not POV character, and if so I think it’s logical that it’s Finnrey that becomes the canon ship here. In the Padawan!Rey route, he’s the newcomer protagonist, not Rey. If they’re shipped, or even as friends, they may bond over their dehumanizing, harsh backgrounds and the feeling of being lost in the world. Also he likely starts a mutiny. Like it was such an obvious plot point but they never use it for some bizarre reason. It’s like the DM didn’t read his character sheet at all. Actually one didn’t and the other kept forgetting it in the third campaign.

There’s two ways I think his arc could go; first would be a focus mainly on his search for identity and becoming his own person. Second, his guilt about having done the First Order’s bidding for so long. Probably a combination of the two, though I’m not sure how to address them both. He also wants to see his colleagues free from slavery. But I am sure about I’d that he’d have to overcome his conditioning, learning to regain his humanity.

Especially if Rey is a Skywalker and he becomes a Jedi, he’d be the one who the movie makes a point about being from nowhere. He has no idea who his parents are, but it would not even matter in the end, it’s what he makes of his life from here on out. And if he and Rey end up together, which is extremely likely in this scenario, he not only finds his family in the figurative sense with the other Jedi and his new friends plus girlfriend, but in the literal sense as well, going from nameless Stormtrooper FN-2187, to just Finn the ex-Stormtrooper, to Finn the Padawan and then Jedi Knight, to finally, Finn Skywalker, Jedi Knight; maybe the last movie ends with one of them proposing to the other, with SW8 having previously ended with the climactic big damn kiss that cemented that they are a thing now. (Cue Luke jokingly asking when he’s getting grandchildren and How It Should Have Ended!Anakin squeeing over him getting great-grandchildren lol) His name would have this real symbolic value to it with how it changes as he goes from nobody to somebody. Not to mention “Finn Skywalker” is just a freakin’ awesome name. If they make up the leading duo, he and Rey may have some kind of inherent connection, or they progress into two parts of the same whole, even attaining something like a Dyad.

I thought an interesting thing to do if Rey is a Skywalker, and this is Cynical Rey, is a twist on the expected pattern by making him the one who sees the good in Kylo, not Rey. Because while Rey might be his cousin, she’s also a very distrustful person who couldn’t afford to think deeply about people act the way they do when she was growing up and fighting to survive. Meanwhile, Finn knows Kylo, and he also knows what it’s like to be determined to be a killing machine from a very young age, and if he has to forgive himself, or if he’s able to see the light, that Kylo deserves a chance as well. It would be the ultimate show of kindness from him, to show him forgiving the man who works so loyally under the same organization that enslaved him. I can also see Kylo being angry at himself for being unable to sense the Force-Sensitive in their midst. 

Maybe he was born on a “Lightside nexus” planet too so that it makes sense that he can keep up with other characters? Presuming he’s in his early 20s, I don’t think him being raised by the Order since he was a baby is that plausible, so maybe he was already an orphan? I can see the First Order spinning their Stormtrooper program kidnapping street orphans as “rehabilitating” them, which combined with good old Victorian style citizen apathy to street children allows them to get away with it. But if he was, say, around 6 years old when he was taken away, it would make sense why he was able to break out of his programming. Perhaps Poe showing him friendship awoke the humanity long dormant in him. But on the other hand, the younger, adolescent soldiers may be beyond saving, and I can see that being absolutely heartbreaking. 

I can see his fighting style with a saber being direct, forceful, and pragmatic, but unlike Rey the emphasis would be on engaging and keeping up the fight, and be very disciplined, calculated, and controlled in contrast to Cynical Rey. At least he’d attempt it while he gets used to the properties of a lightsaber, before there would probably be a lot of awkwardness as John is directed to swing this weightless prop blade with a weighted hilt like he would a club or sword. If he isn’t a Force Sensitive, he’s a good sniper just like in BF2, in fact this would be his primary combat ability, though still able to hold his own in melee combat. Though even as a Jedi he’d probably still use a gun as a sidearm, and his good aim would also translate to him being very good at spotting openings and spotting danger from a distance, as well as enhanced ability to dodge. 

Poe Dameron: Age 29 (?). A total bro. I’ve kind of come to think of him as this embodiment of the good, wholesome side of traditional masculinity. I can best describe him as the guy you expect to think of when you think of the guy who takes the boys to the bar for beers on the house and hosts Super Bowl night (for the Americans out there). Basically just that big bro/cool uncle everyone likes. I think he’s the least changed from how he is in SW7; he’s a laid-back pilot with no special powers, and while he’s probably the most static and admittedly flat character (and unfortunately more minor than the other two) he has tons of charisma and optimism to compensate, though being the one who keeps everyone sane definitely helps. Not to mention his piloting skills; which, note, are never eclipsed by Rey, because that’s dumb. His skills are a bit more downplayed here, but he’s still extremely good, especially for his age. Despite being the pilot he’s the most down-to-earth, and may be the only one of the big four with any social skills, even if he’s a bit dorky, especially regarding BB-8. 

Son of Rebel pilots, graduated top of his class in the Republic Flight Academy, and his background is squeaky clean, no drug trading involved, though he spent a lot of his adolescence and his adulthood in the Academy or in the military, just like in pre-TROS supplementary material. He’s the main source of jokes and wisecracks out of the trio in all but the most dorky of Fangirl!Rey routes probably, teaching Cynical!Rey and Finn what it’s like to smile and laugh. He still has a close relationship with Leia and Han; possibly closer to the latter due to the latter being a pilot and likely still a General. Not sure about him keeping his rank because him starting and staying at the top might mesh awkwardly with the rest of the trio, but maybe he’s still a Commander; whichever makes his inclusion in the main cast most plausible. Due to an adorable Pixiv comic I found he may have been inspired to become a pilot by Luke or Han. I’d like to think that he breaks the hotshot pilot cliché a bit by not being too overly arrogant, immediately setting himself apart from Han by being a wholesome guy there for his buddies from the start, even if he is fond of wisecracking and snarkiness (probably from hanging around Han and Leia), and inside that laid-back personality lies a hotblooded, passionate, unwavering core. Like, he’s not exactly hotheaded like a Latin stereotype (*ahem*), but he’s got this more subtle, but still apparent, underlying fiery hotbloodedness to him, something that especially makes itself apparent in high-stress situations and when it comes to his loved ones. He’d also be Rey and Finn’s mentor of sorts in stuff that doesn’t involve the Force, being their role model for what a functional member of society is. He may make some self-depreciating jokes about being “normal”, but I think mostly he’ll take it in stride. Though I can see him and Han having a chat about this in a more quiet scene. 

Ironically, out of the trio he could maybe be said to be the most suited to be a Jedi personality-wise, despite the fact that he has no Force Sensitivity whatsoever; he goes with the flow, he isn’t troubled, he’s happy with the simple pleasures in life, he’s just a good, genuine guy who does good things, passionate but not obsessive, and he’s forgiving, willing to give even an enemy soldier a chance, appealing to the humanity in him. The last one is particularly Luke-like, don’t you think? Oh, to elaborate on the escape; I still like the idea of him giving Finn his name (though another idea I love is a fallen friend giving Finn his name, that would change stuff around a lot from what I am thinking at this moment). I also think that perhaps supplemental material or some flashbacks, or even an animated short could be made showing just how Poe broke Finn’s programming; by showing him genuine kindness, because somehow, despite his lack of Force Sensitivity, he saw that FN-2187 could be talked out of his programming if he was constantly nice to him, befriending him, starting up casual chatter with him, and after a while the trooper starts opening up to this pilot. …Yeah, Luke-like indeed. Though since there is the plot hole of why Finn could be convinced in mere days and why he’s the only one guarding such a high-profile prisoner, a more realistic idea may be that they talk to each other this way a few times, then Poe escapes and Finn goes after him before they both crash on Jakku and have to work together, with Poe immediately being friendly with Finn and later Rey, to his (and her) confusion. (I can just imagine Poe being all chipper and trying to engage Finn in conversation, or telling him “Good job, sport!” after they fight off bandits or something, and Finn just is all deadpan and “We are enemies, we have no reason to fraternize” and I find that kind of cute).

He may ultimately be the most static of the main cast, but I can see him having a huge impact in more subtle ways; like maybe Rey and Finn think of what Poe might do in a given situation in their training, and he could be the catalyst behind why Finn thinks that Kylo can be redeemed, just like how Poe was able to light another way when it felt like there was only one path for him. He also definitely wouldn’t be the type to be so reckless with his men like he was in TLJ, if he’s still a Commander; he cares about his men a lot, and in fact they may be the reason why he tends to act like an older brother. I can imagine a pretty poignant scene with Finn where Finn sees Poe by himself and BB-8 paying respects to his fallen comrades by this handmade cenotaph, as he sets some flowers down and pours a drink to them, and Finn once again is able to see how different the culture outside the First Order is, as he would have never been mourned like that if he died on the battlefield, nor can he imagine he ever would have done so himself. Or maybe Rey is there too, because if this is Cynical Rey she’s only known a life where people exploited each other. Maybe other characters like Jessika (who he’s already close to I think? Did she show up in the movies though?) or Rose would have the opportunity to be more than background characters by being part of his crew, and we’d get some charming scenes about the bond he has with his squadron.

Again, admittedly he’d be the least deep character out of the big four, with his feelings not being explored nearly as much. But he probably doesn’t really hide his feelings much anyway. For any supplementary shorts involving him, they would be mainly lighter stories about his relationship with the OT cast and their families and his friendship with BB-8 and his crew, or action-y ones about missions he’s gone on; as opposed to, say, Finn, which would show his life as an expendable trooper who knew nothing but war, Cynical!Rey and her crushing loneliness and growing disillusionment to the world as she struggles to survive, or Padawan!Rey and her anguish and grappling with the Dark Side in the aftermath of the Jedi Massacre. 

I can also imagine him being this adorable Shipper On Deck for Finnrey lol. Just looking at his two friends, all proud, maybe even tearing up like “*sniff* I’m not crying Buddy, you’re crying!” when the inevitable big kiss scene happens. I can also imagine him being the one to tell Finn that “Hey Finn, what you’re feeling is love!”…And then he has to spend hours trying to explain what love even is to him lol. He always has his friends’ back after all. Again, he’s most likely the one guy who isn’t completely socially inept among these dorks. I’ve also had the potential idea that he could maybe be a good cook, and he’d be the one who introduces Rey and Finn to actually good food. Some fics I’ve noticed tend to show him cooking stuff probably for that reason. It’s just kind of cute, and it sets a good example if despite his traditionally masculine, salt-of-the-earth character, he likes some less “manly” stuff like such and sees no shame in it.

He may sacrifice himself in a blaze of glory towards the end, especially because quite frankly he may lose his plot relevance as the story goes on, though it would definitely be way more respectful than a lot of deaths were treated in the sequels. But I also want him to stick around because I want to imagine him being all proud of Rey and Finn after they propose to each other and giddily planning their wedding, and I feel he could have some very good interactions with Ben to build on for any spinoffs taking place after the trilogy. Speaking of…

Kylo Ren/Ben Solo: AKA Yet Another Ball Of Lost Potential: Anti-Villain Addition. This is gonna be a doozy, so strap in. He was probably the most developed character here but that just makes his lost potential stick out even more, so I have so much to say about him.

About 27 probably. While people complain about it, I actually like him being a manchild. It makes him a bit unique in this series. It’s kind of like Vader if he didn’t get stuck in that suit and kept acting like Anakin. In fact, that could make him even more terrifying if that feeds into how destructive he can be; at first he seems like your typical intimidating SW villain, not even that bad a leader with a seemingly calm if tense, imposing air, but it eventually becomes clear he’s this terrifying, volatile berserker who can throw some of the most destructive tantrums ever, and is ultimately a pathetic, broken, pitiful shell of a man. …He just happens to be a very powerful shell of a man. Maybe if he becomes emotional or angry enough, he can unleash powerful shockwaves that basically blow up everything around him, or cause mini Force Storms, or cause any number of unpredictable effects. Though he’s not quite constantly raging either; these berserk states are indeed triggered by anger, but I’m thinking that they are also basically weaponized panic attacks, there’s a sense that it’s also a self-defense mechanism that he lapses into when emotions overwhelm him or when he otherwise feels threatened (though whether it’s necessarily involuntary all the time I’m not so sure; but while he’d definitely want to be able to trigger them voluntarily, there will always be some sense that he doesn’t have full control over it). Also a lot of his rage is directed inwards as well, much like with his grandfather. I thought that maybe his unpredictability in these rages would be the key to his destructiveness, though I can see how someone who is out of control would also pose a problem, no matter how powerful; so maybe this is when he becomes the most focused, becoming locked onto the elimination of the perceived threat at all costs, and/or he can be controlled by his Master more directly like some kind of attack animal. 

Luke’s first padawan, or at least after Leia or Grogu (I might make him show up as Luke’s first knighted pupil and allude to this, providing more exposition on Kylo, and being one of the Jedi who help fight in the final battle as the Skywalkers go on to take on the final boss (and Grogu’s name being revealed would be a massive hype moment in The Mandalorian)). Due to his storied family, plus the name of his uncle and grandfather’s own master, he had heavy expectations on his (at the time) small shoulders from an early age. However, he had long been tormented by the Dark Side due to an untraceable curse placed upon him by Snoke, and probably a pre-existing anxious personality. The expectations placed on him, or maybe perhaps just self-imposed expectations, only worsened his turmoil, resulting in a festering mess of self-hatred, extreme perfectionism, and an obsession with familial honor and obsessive attachment to his family, especially Luke, that is a nasty combination of hero-worship and the abovementioned complexes and may border on almost incestuous.

There’s three ways for his backstory to go; “Underachiever Ben”, where Ben is either mediocre as a Jedi or still good but outperformed by others, or “Elsa Ben”, where he’s basically like Elsa from Frozen, possessing an extreme amount of power but barely able to control it, possibly due to Snoke’s curse, and a sort of middle ground, where Ben was super strong and a quick learner, but the dark side in him made Luke feel mixed about Ben’s increasing power, which Ben sensed. If the former, Ben becomes increasingly frustrated at himself for being such a “failure”. If “Elsa Ben”, there’s that, and also the added pain of him growing up terrified of himself and able to sense the terror he causes to those around him, so he was taken in by Luke so hopefully Luke could figure something out; he could have been destructive from the start, or maybe he started to become increasingly destructive despite his training. If the middle ground route, he takes Luke’s mixed emotions to mean that he doesn’t think he’s good enough. How severe Snoke’s curse would have been I’m not fully sure on; he could have voices in his head and nightmares keeping him up for days, chipping away at his sanity, tempting him to accept the darkness, or it may have just been an amplifying of his already unstable emotions. They could have even started as the latter and escalated to the former. But I’m thinking that to best explain his behavior I’m leaning towards the Elsa route. Eventually, his nightmares morphed into repeated visits by Darth Vader, his grandfather, who told him about the truth of his lineage and how he became Vader, slandering everything and everyone he ever admired or loved, telling him of his “true” destiny, and how he should give up and embrace it; unable to hear the real Anakin’s ghost screaming at him to not repeat his mistake. This extended campaign of mental torment stunted his emotional growth in many aspects, and at times he may seem to regress even more. Maybe other padawans were afraid of him because of this dark side presence, avoiding him, and/or were jealous of him because of his lineage and relation to Luke. He often felt entitled to be Luke’s right hand, getting jealous at other students and taking any reprimanding, no matter how gentle, extremely personally. Luke would have needed to struggle between not seeming to be biased towards his nephew and giving him the attention he needed, especially because Ben would feel like Han and Leia abandoned him because they weren’t able to help him, but considering how attached he is to Luke this would hurt him. So when Luke went to speak to him one night, or rushed in sensing an overwhelming dark side presence in his room, and was suddenly attacked by Snoke with a vision of what his nephew would become and making him go into fighting mode for a split second, drawing his weapon to protect Ben, and/or earlier admitted in anguish that he had no idea what was tormenting him despite his efforts, the straw broke the pedestal and he resigned himself to his “destiny”. Ironically he’s just exchanging one sky-high ideal for another, but he’s too emotionally immature to realize this, nor does he fully realize the fact that Snoke merely sees him as a malleable, gullible means to an end. Yet he still feels that pesky pull to the light, and he becomes increasingly frustrated with himself that even as a Dark side user, he still can’t be “perfect” or “worth” anything, not even able to sink himself into the darkness and finally rid himself of his pain. For all the privilege and power he has, or because of it, he always feels worthless. 

Basically I want to break him down and make his pitifulness obvious, but that’s what makes him sympathetic. He’s nowhere as far gone as Vader, even if he wants to be, kind of like a reverse Jekyll and Hyde situation where the Hyde is dominant but Jekyll hangs on, so to speak? Maybe? Is that the right analogy? Or I guess it is kind of like Anakin but sort of not, but he’s rapidly going down the same route of hurting his family like his grandfather. 

From researching a bit, his proposed behavior seems pretty close to the symptoms of BPD, which is actually pretty fitting because I was thinking Luke’s philosophy on the Force would be influenced by a more modern understanding of psychology, and Dialectical Behavior Therapy actually seems pretty in tune with what I understand to be how the Light Side of the Force works (I mean it even has basis in religious meditation…). Perhaps a mystical version of DBT was one of the things Luke was studying in exile. Though obviously it isn’t exactly BPD; portraying an actual, named mental illness not only has way too much baggage behind it, but it breaks immersion. And with him a lot of it will be the influence of the curse, though I think I would rather him have a personality that made him vulnerable to it from the start, so the curse had something to latch onto. 

Going with the “Elsa Ben” scenario, his “real” personality is anxious and even a bit shy. While I like the idea of him being cheerful when he was very little, the shyness always being there is also a characterization I like. Combined with his lumbering physique from his teenage years onwards, this made him a kid who gave off an impression of being extremely dorky (an act that would probably be very natural for Adam Driver to pull off lol) and/or withdrawn and aloof, the latter of which may have made some other padawans think he thought highly of himself and start to resent him. Unlike Anakin he’d be probably a dutiful student, almost creepily obedient, probably actively distancing himself from rebellious behavior, though his way of speaking isn’t exactly super formal either because of the influence of the adults around him. In his obsessions lies a genuine love, even if twisted, of his “favorite person” so to speak. He was also a genuinely sweet kid who wanted to please these special people in his life. He could be said to be actually really selfless in a weird way, because ultimately he values familial honor and being “good enough” for whatever higher purpose more than he values himself. TROS implied some sassiness with that Han-like shrug, and while I can maybe see some of Han rubbing off on him like that, that might be something that started from him trying to copy his parents’ air of confidence, and another coping mechanism. He might, like Vader, have a 501st legion 2.0 which Phasma is in charge of and Finn is part of, and show a more nicer side to them. Perhaps he opened up one or two times to Finn specifically; I can see this image of him venting to him while Finn stands still like how someone might vent to their dog, not really expecting Finn to be listening (also sarcasm might help Kylo obscure his true anguish from Finn, because FO troopers don’t understand sarcasm probably).  

He will be redeemed at the end… and live. Even if not necessarily paired with Rey. I’m neutral on Reylo (though admittedly I have a weak spot for pairs involving a strong woman and a troubled guy, so it’s kind of growing on me), but I really think this ship, or even centering the story strongly around a platonic relationship between these two, could have worked if it was built up strongly (Though if I were to go this route Finn would have to be established as a secondary character from the start, with Rey as the definitive main character, to focus on this). But either way, he’s definitely going to have to face the consequences of what he’s done, make up for his atrocities at least somewhat, and think about what he truly wants to do from now on. I can imagine him quietly reading stories to younglings as Rey, Finn, and Luke train some other pupils outside, or thanklessly working behind the scenes in other ways. For his haters out there, I could make the pill easier to swallow not just by making the reasons for his fall and how he was slowly and meticulously gaslit more clear, but also making him not as awful. Yes, he’s extremely destructive, but he could show more reluctance, or pause after his berserker rages, staring at the destruction he’s caused as the weight of what he’s done sinks in. He’d of course resent that he still has mercy left in him though. I don’t think that there will be a Starkiller Base, but even if there was he might argue with Hux a bit over whether it’s really necessary, until Hux sneers at him for having mercy, saying that Vader never hesitated when blowing up Alderaan, and Kylo reluctantly backs off.

…Actually, what about making him and Rey cousins? On one hand, if Rey is a Skywalker by blood, a direct daughter of the Master himself no less, Ben is now suddenly freed from carrying the weight of the family legacy on his own. On the other hand… He basically loses the thing he has spent his entire life building his identity around; since his fall would have partially been because of his obsession with Luke, he may become jealous and extremely resentful of her, and/or take this as even more reason for Luke to not “need” him anymore. Or perhaps, he pulls a reverse of “I sense the conflict in you” with her, wanting to “save” her from embracing the Light and wanting her to embrace the “true” Skywalker destiny with him. He could even be overjoyed that he could have someone else alongside him to carry on the legacy with; in this scenario he could have an unhealthy obsession with her that might also start crossing into “are you sure this isn’t incest?” territory. Yeah it’s a “join me and we can rule together” scenario again, but it would be done differently. Or perhaps it’s a mix of some of those. Exploring that and how he chooses to take it could be extremely interesting. Maybe it’s resolved when Anakin tells him to “finish what he started”… not just by saving the galaxy, but by also living the rest of his life loving his family not as an ideal, but as family, like Anakin wasn’t allowed to. And platonic Reylo sounds nice too. Though that’s going to make all that shipping fanart so awkward lol. Well it’s not as if Star Wars shippers haven’t been cockblocked by incest before (though his obsession with family and extremely questionable mental state would probably make such shippers go nuts anyway…). 

And going off of Poe being close to his parents, while the main interactions with Kylo from the heroes would be Rey, Finn if he’s the second protagonist, Luke, and his parents, I can see potential for an interesting dynamic and some interesting conversations between them too. Much like how he might react to Rey being Luke’s daughter, I can see him being jealous of Poe and resenting him for being his “replacement”, but after his redemption I can see potential for seeing the start of a friendship between them in epilogue comics, novels, or a mini-series. It would be pretty in-character for my version of Poe to want to help rehabilitate his sort-of stepbrother. Also I now have the adorable mental image of Ben quietly helping Poe (and maybe the rest of his squad) decorate and arrange Rey and Finn’s wedding, or the two surprising Finn with a very elaborate bachelor party, though I’m not sure if those exist in this universe. And because of a certain Inside Llewyn Davis scene I’m also imagining Poe getting Ben to sing with him and BB-8. It’s adorable. 

Also if both Rey and Finn are the main heroes, he might have some kind of link with both of them, and the main duo would both contrast him in their own way (lonely scavenger who no one expected anything of and nameless trooper who defected from the First Order vs. someone who grew up in greatness but seemingly threw it away and chose to be in the First Order; and much like Kylo Finn in particular has been manipulated from childhood to do heinous things, so he may sympathize with his situation). Maybe he’s the missing piece needed for both him and the leading duo to reach their full potential, or the main duo are the last piece needed to finally break Snoke’s curse on him, or something. Or it could simply just be Finn showing his growth and strength of character by understanding and forgiving Kylo, despite him now understanding just how badly the First Order treated him, which makes Rey (who, again, might start as this super cynical scavenger or may have seen Kylo go berserk and massacre her friends and betray her Master) come around to the idea. In this scenario it may actually be even more important to emphasize that Rey and Finn are two making up a whole, so as not to bog stuff down. It’s possible to ship Finnrey and want Kylo to have a better ending, what a shock! 

Maybe Rey and Kylo could switch places, and he comes back to the light in SW8, which is an idea I’ve seen floated and is something that would make the story truly unique. He would seem like basically a less stable Vader 2.0 at the start, but over SW8 he could be seen breaking more and more out of his own terrible mindset, coming to a head in a cathartic realization that bring him back into the arms of his beloved family. It would also add an interesting dynamic that he and Finn have to be equals now. But that may mean that Rey would have to be killed off and I’m not so sure about that. 

Though speaking of her, since in all these scenarios a common thread is that she understandably doesn’t like him, it would be a bit of a twist if Finn sees the good in him but Rey, if she’s a Skywalker, his cousin, doesn’t. 

And to bring up Poe again, I also really like the idea of them having been childhood friends and thus knowing each other before the events of SW7; after all, they’re around similar age, it isn’t that far-fetched to think that former Rebel families would be still pretty close to each other, and I’ve seen some adorable fanfics with the concept. It also adds connection between them and adds even more tragedy, even if this relationship may have to be elaborated more in supplementary material due to time. I can definitely Poe speaking like an old friend to Kylo and constantly calling him “Ben”, to his irritation. The abovementioned feeling of being replaced could be what caused Ben to suddenly break off the friendship. And making the main cast kind of tight-knit like this might also help make the cast easier to manage. 

Granted, there is the possibility of killing him off, though. I heard that one of the initial ideas for TFA was apparently that Kylo would be a reverse Vader, falling deeper and deeper into the Dark Side as the trilogy goes on. In fact, this may have been where Kylo killing Han may have been leading to. This actually sounded like a super cool idea, but considering the backstory I laid out I thought it would be way too bittersweet for the concluding movie of the saga, and if one were to say Kylo basically has BPD… That might lead to some unfortunate implications. I mean nothing is stopping me from not using the Elsa backstory, and if I didn’t use it maybe this route would be pretty viable, but I’m kind of starting to get attached to it. 

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Other characters:

Hux: I’ve never really been a villain person. I mean I liked sympathetic villains, yeah (but even then I preferred anti-heroes for a while; I’m talking like nothing beyond N from Pokémon levels of “evil”), but straight-up villains I just have merely seen as obstacles. Like back in my Smash fic days I was often like “Eh… They’re there… Because they want to take over the world I guess?”. It’s why I’m having trouble with Snoke probably lol. But for some reason Hux interests me. If I take a guess it’s probably because of the potential he had as an actual foil to Kylo in his own faction. He had so much potential as a villain, and in having this tense dynamic play out. In fact he does seem to have been set up that way in SW7. But yeah, I imagine him as one coldhearted bastard. His backstory, though not elaborated on in the movies, would be much like TFA supplementary material set him up; he’d still have killed his father, but while yes, Brendol was abusive and strict, Armitage didn’t kill him completely because he was a young man who wanted to break free from his strict father, but also genuinely because he knew doing so would be good for his standing. Unlike Kylo when he (most likely) kills Han, he doesn’t regret killing Brendol at all. While he might have a tragic backstory kind of explaining his behavior, it doesn’t bother him at all, while Kylo, who considering what happened to him and how he’s literally under a curse you’d think would have a much steeper fall into unabashed evil, is constantly conflicted. It’s a very Sith Lord-like backstory funnily enough… In fact I’m pretty sure that Palpatine had a backstory very similar to this with his parents.  

He’s a very logical, analytical, brutally pragmatic person, and he looks upon Kylo’s emotional state with condescension. I’m increasingly starting to like the idea that he’s somehow able to talk Kylo down, while still being hardly nice. Perhaps he preys upon Kylo’s constant need for approval from others, even if he doesn’t like the person in question (this may also be why Kylo reacts so strongly to Finn escaping as well, in fact. He genuinely cares about people’s loyalty, even from literal no-name soldiers). Though I can’t decide whether he’s this deceptively charming snake or basically an evil Spock. I also can’t decide between him being in this constant state of “Why do I have to babysit this manchild” or giving absolutely no visible f*cks around Kylo no matter what happens, or even straight-up trolling him often, toying with his emotions because it amuses him; preferably two or a bit of all somehow? I can see him using having met Vader as a child to mock Kylo for how much of a pale, childish imitation he is, or reminding Kylo of how much better he is as a leader objectively; perhaps that’s what he holds over Kylo’s head. Or him explaining to Kylo how he was raised by less than stellar parenting and tried so hard to live up to his strict father too… So he brutally murdered Brendol in cold blood (possibly with Phasma’s help), became a better admiral than he ever was, and got over it “Like an adult. Unlike you.”. They’d be in this constant state of delicate, tense equality; Kylo can easily overpower Hux if he pisses him off a bit too much, but Hux is able to walk that fine edge seemingly without much effort. 

But when he realizes whatever grand cosmic plot he and the entire First Order has been participating in this whole time is when, ironically, there would probably be a really dramatic villainous breakdown from him. It’s kind of a Zuko and Azula situation with Kylo and Hux perhaps? Or is this Hux more a mix of Azula and Zhao’s roles rather?

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Worldbuilding stuff: Since I’m more a character person, there isn’t much here, but because the worldbuilding was another issue in the movies I’ll also be adding these.

The New Republic isn’t nuked in the first movie. In fact it stays there for the duration of the trilogy and the hero faction is now its armed forces, not The Resistance (Also that name makes no sense. Seriously. At least name them The Peacekeeper Corps or Vigilantes or something, or since they’re basically Leia’s personal military maybe the Organa Free Army or Organa Corps or something of that sort. No wonder people mistakenly call them The Rebels sometimes. It’s a similar setup to Chrom’s Shepherds in Fire Emblem Awakening, albeit with a better relationship with the kingdom; it would be downright strange if the Shepherds called themselves The Resistance despite literally existing with the queen’s permission, and it still is here. Hell, Leia’s Shepherds is a better name). There would be elaboration on the political stuff going on behind the scenes, and if Leia isn’t a Jedi that’s her plotline probably, though a big part of me wants her to be part of the action instead of being stuck on the homeworld. 

Meanwhile, The First Order is made up of Imperial Remnants and people and planets who were unsatisfied with the democratic but still new and fragile New Republic. Basically think White Russians if the Soviets weren’t also awful. It happens a lot in history. While it may have some mining planets in its orbit (not literally, you know what I mean) so it can plausibly refurbish anything Kylo wrecks with his tantrums, Starkiller Base is probably a bit much, and a lot of their equipment might be old Imperial or Rebel stuff, or stolen from the New Republic, with new stuff being produced but not in overly high quantity. Some of the equipment deemed less important might even be kind of crappy due to how old they are. They’d probably be at most an equally powerful faction to the Republic, if not smaller than them, seeming more like a terrorist cell. I don’t have much of an idea why Snoke would want to be involved in it yet though. 

But while the First Order might be smaller, the New Republic is hindered by it just now finally gaining its footing, and the military previously only having been used for peacekeeping and sniping stray Imperial remnants. Because it’s peacetime, it might have been kept pretty small, and also the military academies are literally not even 30 years old at this point, so new that it’s possible Poe, despite his youth, was one of the earliest graduates; one of the military’s most high-ranking officers is literally a scoundrel with no formal training - even if he is good at his job - it isn’t exactly a well-oiled machine, though its less rigid, casual structure also does benefit it in some aspects. Also the FO can easily use Kylo as intimidation, and its upper staff is nothing if not driven and motivated as well as ruthless. They may engage in more underhanded actions like sabotage and suicide bombers, or rely on small elite units like the Knights of Ren or small companies of troopers, to poke holes in the enemy just as much as open combat. And maybe if all else fails Snoke causes something really bad to happen seemingly out of nowhere. 

While I do think that making the baddies an Empire 2.0 is an… uncreative decision, I want to keep Finn’s backstory, plus it fits Kylo’s story too so blah, I kind of have to keep it. Plus I want to do Phasma and Hux justice. Maybe Snoke or whatever it serves turns into a giant Eldritch abomination and have no use for the FO anymore. And again, reactionary forces are a thing that have existed throughout early modern history. But as already mentioned, due to the nature of the First Order’s existence, maybe the Stormtroopers aren’t kidnapped, but they were orphans picked off the streets, and/or some more dedicated Imperial parents gave them their children? I had the idea that Troopers like Finn are “Junior Troopers”, the child slave type, while older members, “Senior Troopers”, would be legit Imperial revanchists and former troopers. Maybe there’s a separate company of Juniors who think they’re cool by fighting for the First Order, but generally Juniors would be the lowest on the social rung, though some might make it into higher positions, and don’t know any other life than what they have now. Though I also like the idea that Finn was part of an elite unit directly connected to Kylo Ren like the 501st, so he has a reason to be particularly hurt by his betrayal (but that could throw a wrench in the whole Finn was a faceless cog in the machine thing). They’re pretty Prussian in command structure; officers work under mission-tactics, but the rank-and-file are machine-like in their discipline, more than even some actual droids. The Republic’s forces also probably engage in mission-tactics a lot, except how far it is acceptable goes way further down the chain of command, so stuff like the Holdo situation doesn’t happen. If that situation were to happen when mission-tactics were to be expected Poe’s independent action would be seen as reasonable. This would have potential for very interesting battles and tactics, though I’d need a lot of help with those because I’m the furthest thing from a tactician you can find (but even I can tell the bomber scene from TLJ was dumb, which should say something).

I kind of realized that it’s possible that the four OT legacy characters may end up basically representing four major aspects of the New Republic; the Jedi (Luke), law and justice (Leia, if she’s a senator), the military (Han, if he’s a general), and economics (Lando). I think some worldbuilding into how the republic functions should be explored through these characters as they move the story forward, except for the Jedi since they’re obviously a central focus, and Luke might very well be introduced after them, and the military will also get focus for obvious reasons, and Poe exists. The information definitely needs to be conveyed as efficiently and organically as possible through the story, because there’s two, likely three, equally important main characters and an unholy amount of secondary characters who aren’t exactly minor. 

May write more later idk. I need to be doing other stuff…

[duhragonball]

Hellsing Liveblog Ch. 45-50

This is the “Soldier of Fortune” arc.  I thought there was a song by this title and there is!    Give it a listen.

This opens with a flashback to Pip Bernadotte’s childhood, where he finds out his whole family is a bunch of mercenaries.    His grandfather confirms it, and I should point out that Grandpa Bernadotte is the most mercenary-looking dude I’ve ever seen.   He’s wearing a friggin’ beret while he tells Pip about how his dad died in some war to raise money while Ma Bernadotte was pregnant with Pip.   Was Pip’s mother a merc too? 

I guess my point is that this whole scene feels really stupid to me.   Kid Pip grew up among mercenaries, but he’s literally the last person in town to find out about it.  How do the kids at school know?   Are the Bernadottes that well-known?   I always assumed mercenaries tried to keep a low profile.   Then again, they are entrepreneurs, so maybe the kids in school found ads about the Bernadottes in the phone book.  

Even so, was Pip’s family trying to keep this a secret from him?  Because Grandpa sure wasn’t.   Not with that beret he’s got on.   It’s like he’s been waiting Pip’s whole life to tell him, so why didn’t he mention it before?  You’d think he’d want to raise the boy to follow in his footsteps, the same as Pip’s dad.  Did Pip’s mom not want him to grow up to be a mercenary?  It just seems like she should have known that wouldn’t work out.  

Anyway, Grandpa Bernadotte waxes philosophical about killing people for money, which doesn’t seem like much of a justification.   Pip was very upset about the whole thing, and I don’t think Grandpa said anything to make him less upset, and then we flash forward to the present day, where Pip’s a mercenary.

I mean, what was the point of that flashback?  Pip was horrified to find out his family kills for profit, and then at some point he got over it and joined the family business.   Why didn’t the flashback show us that moment instead?  It seems more relevant.  

At any rate, I feel like the flashback is overlooking the true point of Pip’s character arc.  He starts out a soldier of fortune like his father and grandfather, but by joining up with Hellsing he’s now fighting for a much nobler cause, ridding the world of unspeakably evil monsters.  He still seems to look at it like just another job, but it’s still important.  His defense of the Hellsing mansion is a lot more heroic because he’s fighting against daunting odds with very little hope of surviving to see another sunrise, let alone his next paycheck.  

Back to the main story, when Millennium’s forces invaded London, they sent a company to the Hellsing HQ on the outskirts of the city.   Zorin Blitz was tasked with leading this group, but she was ordered to hold off on attacking until the Major gave the word.   The Major then fired rockets at the mansion, only for Seras Victoria to shoot the rockets down... and Zorin’s zeppelin.   Now, Zorin is trying to lead a ground attack on the mansion, except Pip has turned the entire yard into a minefield.   

Seras disapproves, but Pip doesn’t care.   In this sort of conflict, he and his men, the Wild Geese, are at a complete disadvantage.   Vampires, even the weaker, artificial vampires of Millennium, are faster, stronger, and harder to kill.  He hints at some sort of vampiric ability to read an opponent’s movements, too, which might have something to do with that whole “third eye” trick Seras and Alucard use.   Against all of that, landmines are a sensible precaution, since they’re powerful enough to kill a vampire in one shot and don’t rely on a human operator with killing intent. Seras can gripe, but if Hellsing had used mines back in volume 2, the Valentine Brothers never would have made it inside.  Pip clearly read up on that debacle, since it must have taken weeks for his men to bury all these mines.

The landmines do kill a lot of Zorin’s troops, and the Wild Geese lay down heavy fire from the mansion to keep up the pressure, but Zorin won’t give up so easily.   She uses he powers to create some sort of zany illusion, where everyone sees a giant Zorin Blitz attacking the mansion.

So what the hell is Zorin Blitz, exactly?   I thought she was a vampire, but reading this manga has revealed that Rip Van WInkle is a werewolf, which led me to suspect Zorin is a werewolf too.   But the manga is silent on Zorin being one or the other.  I check the Hellsing Wiki, but it contends that both women are vampires, and the term “Werewolf” just refers to the group of officers in Millennium.   This group includes literal werewolves like the Captain and Schrodinger, but not Blitz and Rip.   

Maybe it doesn’t matter that much, but I find it a little silly to call all four of those characters “Werewolves” and then only two of them are really werewolves.   Clearly, all four of them are a cut above the Major’s other troops, and none of them show any interest in drinking blood, or any other vampire-exclusive traits.   On the other hand, this whole battle takes place under a full moon, and none of them seem to be affected by it.    Unless the Major chose this particular night to launch his offensive because he wanted them all to be at full power.   Maybe Zorin couldn’t do this illusion thing otherwise.

Anyway, the Wild Geese see this giant woman slashing at them with a scythe, and they all panic.   Seras sees it too, but she somehow intuits that it can’t be real.   Then she sees Alucard, who reminds her of her third eye.   I’m not sure if this is a flashback or Alucard is using telepathy to coach her from the deck of the H.M.S. Eagle.  

Either way, Seras uses her third eye and not only sees through the illusion but lines up a shot on the illusion-caster.  But it only grazes Zorin.   It disrupts the illusion, but it doesn’t end the threat.

And even though the illusion is shattered, it still distracted the Wild Geese long enough for Millennium troops to enter the mansion.   Seras manages to shoot them down, but there’s more where that came from.

Because the Nazi bastards figured out a way past the mines.   They just threw a bunch of knives on the ground and played hopscotch to get across.   I guess this means they can only get in one at a time, but it’s still bad news for the good guys.

So Pip adjusts his tactics accordingly.  He and his men will regroup and hold up in a defensible location, while Seras roams the building to take the fight to the enemy.   I guess the idea is to divide Millennium’s focus.   They can attack the Geese or watch out for Seras, but not both.   For some reason, Seras calls Pip “sir”, like he’s in charge, and maybe that is appropriate in this situation, but I thought Seras was in charge of their training.  

Then one of the Geese pats her on the butt and Pip steals a kiss.   I’m not sure what the hell this is about.   I guess they were trying to lighten the mood before they go to face certain death, but if my life depended on some vampire girl killing all the bad guys before they can rip me to shreds, I probably wouldn’t sexually harass her, or do anything else to tick her off.   But that’s just me.

Pip seems resigned about their chances.  He’s confident in Seras’ ability, but there’s only one of her and like... 30?  Let’s say 30, thirty Nazi Vampires heading their way.  If even one of them gets past Seras, the Geese will all die horribly.   But they took this job and the risks that come with it, and besides, there’s nowhere for them to run anyway.    He seems to accept the situation with a mercenary sense of honor.   Like, a mercenary should expect to die in some unwinnable battle, and they shouldn’t complain about it, since it’s the nature of the business. 

Anyway, it doesn’t go well.   The nature of the comic doesn’t really make it clear how the Wild Geese are operating, but I get the impression that they’re doing sort of a fighting withdrawal concentrating their forces as they give ground.    But they suffer a lot of casualties in the process.

This leads to the Geese holing up in the big conference room where Integra met with the Royal Order of Protestant Knights before the Valentine Bros. attack.   One guy panics and wants to bug out, but Pip reminds him of what I said a minute ago.   They’ve got nowhere else to go, and they all got into this for the action, so they should stick to their principles, even in the face of death.

There’s this one guy from “B-block”, who I guess was covering a certain hallway, but B-Block got cut off before they could join the others in the Round Table room.    Zorin Blitz decides to have some fun with him, so she uses her weird powers to make him see himself back home, with his dead daughter.  

This seems especially cruel, because it’s not like Zorin needed this diversion to kill one dude.   She’s just really sadistic.

Meanwhile, some other Millennium guys are eating the Wild Geese they already killed, and one of them shows off his ability to tell blood types just by taste.   It’s this really sick moment, but at the same time it humanizes the characters, which is a weird thing to say when discussing Nazi vampires, but you know what I mean.

Then Seras blows the dude’s head off, which is extremely satisfying.

So Seras is holding up her end, and growing more resolute with each kill.   She’s really improved a lot since the last time she was in action.    Yeah, these Millennium vampires probably aren’t that much tougher than the vampires she killed back in the summer, but there are a lot more of them, and they’re trained soldiers on top of that, and she doesn’t have Alucard backing her up like she did before.

By now, all that’s left of the Wild Geese are in this barricaded room, and they’ve run low on silver bullets, which means even the few shots that don’t miss will have almost no effect.   Pip is determined to hold out, confident that Seras will save them, but...

She runs out of bullets before she runs out of enemies to kill.   When she arrives to save the day, she’s still has to go through Zorin Blitz.

But Zorin doesn’t see this as a problem, and she uses her freaky mind powers on Seras, forcing her to relive memories of her days at the orphanage.    Yeah, Seras was an orphan, remember?   Alucard asked Walter about her parents a while back, and Walter said they were both dead.  How did they die?

Well, Zorin Blitz is about to find out...

[alovesongshewrote]

Almost A Thousand Years - 1300 | Hisirdoux Casperan

Plot:  You’ve known Hisirdoux Casperan for almost a thousand years.  You’ve hated him for almost a thousand years.  And for almost a thousand years, you’ve been cursed to feel each others pain.  But somewhere in that time, things changed.  [Hisirdoux Casperan x Mostly Gender Neutral but Probably Female Presenting Based on How Historical Men Treat Them!Reader]

Word Count: 2,543

Warnings:  THIS ONE IS BIG SAD GUYS, minor character death, plague, fighting, blood, injury, enemies to lovers emphasis on enemies, reader gets called a wench by Douxie :(

A/N:  Two in one night because the last chapter was short, lol

Tag List: @furblrwurblr

Back | Next​

Before the plague, a few things happened.

You were in Italy, learning all you could during the renaissance.  It was a very exciting time for you, everything you were passionate about was reborn, and it felt like you were starting a new life with them.  Maybe, in this life, you wouldn’t have to hide as much.  You wouldn’t have to be a spy or a soldier to survive, you could just be as you were.  You could walk in the dark without fear.  You were full of hope for a brief and shining moment.

And then Hisirdoux Casperan found you.

You’d been in the market, purchasing a few things that you needed, as you do, when you caught a glimpse of a familiar familiar.  

So, you ran.  Again.

It definitely wasn’t the best plan, seeing as you brought a lot of unwanted attention to yourself.  That didn’t matter though, you just had to keep going.  You made it all the way out of town before the first spell was cast.  Blue magic, from him, hit you in the back, tripping you.

The unforgiving ground scratched up your hands, drawing blood and stinging your palms.  Quickly, you got to your feet.  Turning to face the apprentice, you saw him glaring at his own hands.  You smirked, knowing that whatever he did to you, he’d feel himself.  You took his distraction as an opportunity, casting a spell of your own, throwing him into a tree.

Then you winced, feeling the impact, and remembered that you'd feel whatever you did to him.

The wizard stood, raising his hands to attack you again, but a small black mass interrupted him, “Douxie!  Stop this!”

“Aww, your cat knows I’ll kill you!  How protective, how cute,”

“Shut up, wench!”

“Ooooh, emotional.  Love that,”

Hisirdoux looked like he’d attack you again any second, but Archie stopped him again, not even allowing him to speak this time, “You were a spy for the Gumm-Gumm army, (Y/N), why?”

You felt a little bad at that.  The familiar actually sounded hurt, which was a bit of a surprise for you.  You'd assumed that everyone in Camelot jumped to hating you, you never considered that you'd hurt anyone, “I-I didn’t-”

“It doesn’t matter!  The witch betrayed us, she betrayed Merlin!”  

“Douxie, please.  Whatever you do, remember, you will also feel it,”

The wizard scowled and put down his fists, deciding that you weren't worth the pain.  You did the same, glaring at them both.

“You should leave,” you told them, “The people around here aren’t crazy about strangers,”

And with that, you walked away.

You didn’t wait to see if the wizard stuck around.  You had to get home, pack up, and leave again.  It wasn’t safe here anymore.

--

A few years later, you were in France.  It was a beautiful country, really, full of rolling hills and stunning fields, breath-taking coasts, and awe-inspiring mountains.  It was lovely, really.

Unfortunately, it was also the Hundred Years War, so literally everyone was fighting literally all the time, and you, of course, got caught up in it.

You had tried to avoid it, you really did.  You'd wandered the countryside, trying your best to mind your own business, picking your way through a war-torn land and trying to admire the beauty in it at the same time

And then one afternoon, miles away from France, Douxie felt a sharp, intense pain in his arm.  He stared down at his limbs, concerned that he'd hurt himself somehow, but there was nothing on his skin.  He was fine.  Which meant you weren’t.

And you were not, in fact, fine.  You’d been stabbed.  Fortunately, not anywhere too important, but it was still enough to kill you if you didn’t get help.

And you assumed no one would help.  If Casperan felt this he was too far away to do anything, and he’d never help you, even if he could.  No one else knew you existed, and it wasn't like helping strangers was something everyone did.  Even if it were popular, the people around you were too busy fighting.  You had to face facts.  You were going to die here.

It wasn't pleasant, but the very least this was better than whatever Gunmar had planned for you.

You accepted your fate and stared at the sky, watching clouds float in and out of view.  And then they got closer.  You were confused for a moment before you realized that someone had picked you up.  You tried to see the face of your savior, but all you could see was a metal helmet.  The helmet of your savior faded away as you quickly lost consciousness.

You woke in a dim tent, lit only by lanterns and candles.  The space smelled of herbs and old blood.  In the corner of the tent was an older man, crouched over a wooden table, reading something.  You sat up and looked down at your arm.  It was well bandaged, sore still, but you would survive this wound.

“Good to see you’re awake,”  the man said, not looking up from his book.

“What?  Who are you?”  

“I am no one of consequence.  But you?  A youth such as yourself, unarmed in a battle?  There is something peculiar about you, no doubt about that,”

You paused for a moment.  He was right, you were peculiar, but hopefully, he hadn’t figured out just what was off about you.

“Why did you help me?”

“You’re a person, are you not?  You were in trouble, were you not?  It is my belief that every person who needs help should receive it,”

You could have laughed at that.  This man was himself peculiar in his beliefs.  You hadn’t met many humans with that particular mindset.

“How many people agree with that?”

“Enough of them to make the philosophy worth it,”

The man continued to shuffle around the tent, looking at books and messing with herbs.  You did your best to stand.  He turned to you.

“Good, you can stand,” he handed you a stack of books, which almost dropped immediately after receiving them, “Come!  We have injured men to attend to and little time to do it!”

The doctor left the tent, and you followed.

And you kept following.

For the next few years, you apprenticed under the good doctor, not only learning more about medicine but about humans themselves.  The more you worked with the doctor, the more people you met and healed, the more your admiration for man-kind grew.  You had seen the worst of humanity, but now you saw its other side.

The doctor was an amazing mentor.  He was strict, but not unkind, teaching you everything he knew.  You still had your secrets.  He never knew about your magic, and you never learned his name, but despite that, you made quite the team.  The doctor was always there through the frustration of a tough patient, or the grief of losing someone you couldn’t save.  He helped you navigate the world, something no one else had ever bothered to teach.  The man was quite like a father to you.

And the both of you enjoyed that bond.

One day, after assisting a woman in the birth of her child, the doctor told you something you doubted he’d told anyone else.

“Have I ever told you about my wife young (Y/N)?”

“I don’t believe so, master,”

“She was so beautiful.  Fearless and full of life.  She was the one who believed in people.  For years, I had my doubts about humanity.  I healed for coin and profit.  But she saw the world for what it really was, and she wanted to make it better.  She made me want to make it better,”

“She sounds incredible,”

“She was,”

“If I may, where is your wife now, master?”

“She passed some years ago, child.  I continue my practice in her name.  One day I hope-” he looked out on the horizon, gazing at the rising sun, “I hope I can see her again,”

You raised a hand to his shoulder, “One day master, but not too soon.  This world needs you a while longer,”

He placed a hand over yours, “I know.  I hope she does too,”

“I’m sure she’s alright with waiting for you master,”

It inspired you, how their love lasted.  How it inspired your mentor to be better.  How he hoped to see her in the life after this one, and how she waited for him.  You hoped that, maybe, you’d find a love like that for yourself one day.

--

Then the plague hit.

You and the doctor did everything in your power, but it wasn’t enough.  The pandemic would be a pandemic no matter what you did.

You traveled from town to town, trying your best to ease people's pain, but there was no cure.  You also had to avoid contracting the plague yourself.  Immortal or otherwise, the black death would still hurt, and might actually kill you.  You were even more concerned for your mentor, a mortal,  who was going on in years, becoming more fragile as the days went on.  It didn’t stop him from trying to help the public, for their own benefit and in the name of his wife.  You admired that.

And then he became infected.

You held him in your arms as he died, trying to hide your tears from the old man.  Instead of crying, you did your best to make small talk with the doctor, a tactic he taught you to keep the patient's mind from the pain.  You never thought that he’d be the patient.

“Do you remember that woman, Master?  The one without eyes?  She had such humor about her.  I hope she’s alright,”  

He only nodded.  But there was a curiosity in his eyes.  He had questions, and he wanted them answered before he left this world.  He did not want small talk.

“My dear (Y/N),” he’d rasped, “Tell me, how have you stayed so young?  It’s been years since I saved you from the battlefield, how do you retain your youth?”  

“It’s a story for another day, master,”

He sighed, “You should go, child.  You could become infected if you stay here,”

“No, no, I can’t leave you,”

“I don’t want you to go through this,” he coughed, “Please, (Y/N),”

“No, no, no, there has to be something else I can do, I-”

“(Y/N)-”

“No,” the tears came harder as you let go of the man and lifted your hands, “I’m sorry I hid this from you,”

You began to chant softly, something you hadn’t done in years.  Magic flew from your fingertips, a soft glow surrounded the doctor.  You ignored his wide eyes and kept going, using every healing spell you could think of, praying that it would work.

It didn’t.

Your mentor grabbed your hand, “Thank you, my child.  You’ve allowed me the chance to be your guide, your teacher, and now you’ve shown me magic.  I will see my wife soon.  Maybe someday, we will meet again, and I could introduce you to her”

“I’d love to meet her someday,” you whispered.

And then he was gone.

You buried him in a field of flowers.

And then you let yourself cry.

You wept for days, crying over a burning in your chest that you hadn’t felt since Morgana’s passing all those years ago.  This was a loss unlike anything you’d ever known, and it hurt.  You would gladly face a thousand more stab wounds, scratches, bruises, beatings, whatever before you felt this pain again.  

--

Across the country, Douxie your pain.  

It was odd, because Archie was fine, and apart from that he’d isolated himself.  When people were dying left and right, it was better to live without attachments.  The wizard suffered through the confusion for a few days before he realized; there was nothing wrong with him, something had happened to you.

Now don’t misunderstand, he didn’t actually care about you, but if you were hurt he would feel it, and he wasn’t in the mood to experience unnecessary pain.  Oh god, what if you had the plague?  He didn’t care, but if you had the plague, you’d probably die, and if you died you might take him with you.  That, or he’d lose one of his few remaining attachments to Camelot.  Not that he cared about you or anything, just himself, Archie, and the last of Camelot.  Not you.  Totally not.

He didn’t care so much, that he tracked you down to make sure you weren’t dead.

But that might have been a bad decision considering the two of you were enemies and you were mourning the loss of your father figure.

When he found you, you were sitting alone in a field of flowers, staring into space, looking out at the horizon.  He cleared his throat to get your attention.

“What are you doing here!?”  You barked, moving to face the wizard.  He took note of the black you wore, of your voice, sharp with anger and rough from crying.  Maybe you weren’t physically hurt after all.

“I felt something on your end, I wanted to make sure you hadn't done anything stupid,”

“Well, I’m fine, so why don’t you just leave me alone?”

Hisirdoux turned to leave when he noticed Archie pawing at something at the edge of the field.  A doctor's mask.

“(Y/N)?”

“What!?”

“You haven’t been treating plague patients, have you?”

“Why does it matter to you,”

He picked up the mask and spun around to face you, “If you get the plague, I feel it!  If you die I feel it!  I don’t want to-”

“Oh what, so I’m supposed to stop helping people because you’re afraid of a little pain?  You’re a coward Casperan!”

“And you’re a fool!  Since when do you care about helping people, anyway?  You were happy to betray Camelot!”

“I’ve cared for a long time now, apprentice,” you spat, “And betrayal wasn’t my choice!”

“Wasn’t it?”

You grit your teeth.  Glaring at the ground, you wondered what your master would think of Casperan.  It didn’t matter.  He was gone.

“Get away from me,”

“What?”

“I said GET AWAY!”  You screamed, flinging a spell at your opponent.

He hit the ground hard.  Both of you cried out in pain.

“This is pointless,” you said, tears falling again.  A fight with Casperan was not what you needed right now.

“What aren’t you understanding,” Hisirdoux said, getting to his feet, “If you die from the plague, you could kill us both!”

“I would die gladly if it killed you,”

Those words hurt like nothing else.  Douxie didn’t even like you and yet it still stung.  

Your vicious words hurt you too.  You knew, deep down, you hadn’t really meant that.  You were beginning to realize that everything and everyone you loved would fade with time, and at the end of it, Hisirdoux would be the only thing left.  You still hated him though.

Behind him, Archie hissed, “Douxie, we should go,”

“Fine,”  the wizard said, dropping the mask, “Good luck staying alive,”

You both burned with rage as Casperan left with his familiar, not caring that he hadn’t learned what caused you such pain.

And when they were gone, you cried.

[brujahinaskirt]

@missn11​ says:

Ask and ye shall receive, fellow neonate! <3 Bear with me, because I’m about to hammer out 2000 words very quickly...

This massive rant by its topic nature is sort of Nines-critical, so lemme start by saying that, in my own way, I love Rodriguez. (I was partially self-burning in the shitpost that ignited this rant because I SEVERELY exaggerated Nines’s canonical shadiness levels in my ancient fanfiction, and for no other reason than because I was a teenage edgelord. I am appropriately embarrassed, but only by my excess and melodrama, not by Troika’s characterization. I think the writing behind VTMB’s Nines is superb.)

When it comes to Bloodlines, I think he’s one of the most psychologically interesting profiles in the game. In fact, I could never get into LA by Night because they so de-toothed Troika’s vision of him. Not to say LA by Night’s Nines was a poorly-developed character in his own right, ‘cause he wasn’t at all, but “my” Nines will always be unapologetically and only Troika’s: boiling angry, viciously pragmatic, a survivor who doesn’t let anyone too close lest they see through him, whose over-the-top confident façade cracks a little more every time his back’s against the wall. Troika’s Nines is the epitome of greater VTM’s “fallen rebel” archetype, and even though we don’t get to see it on all playthoughs, that makes it even better and more believable.

But as with all characterization in Bloodlines, we have to read between the lines and between our own play styles a bit to piece the truth of the puzzle together...

Besides the direct evidence Troika gives us—i.e. the music cues, which are a bit overbearing if I’m honest (sorry, Troika! ilu); the absence of Nines in Rosa’s prophecy re: people you can trust; and the overt warnings Camarilla-aligned characters give us about him—the biggest red flag about Rodriguez, imo? It’s twofold:

the way the characters he surrounds himself with talk about him and the type of vampire he chooses to fill his den. Namely: Nines exclusively recruits angry, spurned, mistreated people who are younger and far less experienced than he is

those messy, ugly, fleeting moments where you see his toughguy everyman personality crack

So! Starting with point one:

THE PERSONALITY CULT ITSELF

We can’t deny that Nines does not surround himself with peers. He surrounds himself with followers—people who don’t challenge him in any way, who are fanatically loyal, who openly profess their worship of him and their conviction he could never/would never do anything wrong. If you listen to how Damsel and Skelter talk about him, it’s with frightening adulation, often repeating Nines’s lines word-for-word without truly understanding the argumentation behind them. (Damsel’s the main offender here with her “IT’S A PYRAMID SCHEME… it just makes sense, you know? It just makes sense!” And then, of course, she gets pissed and refuses to speak to you when you push her into elaborating.)

Nines has clearly made himself much more than just a friend-figure or a Sire-figure to them. He’s utterly and completely mythologized by the LA Anarchs, held up next to other politically mythologized names like George Washington and Ho Chi Minh. His followers love him… but there’s a pecking order, and like good body shields, they believe their lives don’t matter as much as he matters. And they love that, too. They want to die for Nines. They’re not just willing to or resigned to it; they’re eager to die. Damsel will volunteer this information the first time you meet her. She just can’t wait to prove herself by taking a bullet for goddamn Nines Rodriguez. It’s literally how she introduces herself to new people.

And yet Nines deliberately withholds his attention and time from his followers. He uses his attention as a reward, as incentive. He rations some care and reassurance and help—makes you feel good and gives you reason to crave his attention—and then he pushes you away, back into his adoring ranks until the next “two minutes” you earn from him in which you’re special enough for such an exceptional, important, cool guy to talk to. That’s a classic manipulation tactic, and a classic personality cult tell.

And Troika is so damn fuckin’ brilliant about it because they don’t stop at showing us that an Anarch-aligned fledgling might feel this way—no, they make the PLAYER also feel this way. On our first playthrough of Bloodlines, we’re desperate to talk to Nines. We want the reward. “Let me finish the plaguebearer quests… let me run to the Elizabeth Dane… I hope Nines talks to me again now! Quick, to the Last Round! Maybe if I say the right thing to make him like me, he’ll give me another free EXPERIENCE POINT!” (iirc he’s one of two characters who will do so, and the only one who gives multiple points.)

But at the end of the day, Nines is indisputably the leader of the Anarchs, and even fledgling figures that out. (“Sounds like you’re the Prince of the Anarchs.”) He’s very much the Baron of Downtown LA, even if he won’t use that language. As for the grating day-to-day management and leadership stuff that might make him somewhat unpopular among the Anarchs, though? He fobs all that stuff off on Damsel!

Damsel, his Minion No. 1—whom a lot of players will hate on their early playthroughs, because she assigns tough missions with little to no reward. Damsel, who has no real power role in the Anarchs and functions only to serve Nines. You help Damsel, and you do Nines’s work—i.e. you do the work of the Barony of LA—and he doesn’t even have to take the admiration hit by having to ask you himself.

There’s only one non-follower of note around Nines. It’s Jack, and by his own words, he’s not one of Nines’s people; he disparages them, in fact. And we’ll notice that Jack—who is stronger, older, and wiser than Nines—very much doesn’t talk about Nines the same way Nines’s followers do. While Jack doesn’t directly insult him and occasionally defends him, Jack also has a downright shocking response to the announcement of the Blood Hunt. When fledgling desperately asks what they can do to help Nines—Jack says, word-for-word: I could give a damn.

Something ain’t quite right about this place.

Moving right along:

NINES IS A FAKE ALPHA MALE WHO KNOWS HE’S GOING TO DIE

Part of why Nines is so attractive to someone scared and weak like our fledgling (or Skelter or Damsel) is that he seems utterly fucking untouchable—like nothing scares him, and that must be reassuring when two of your age-old enemies are moving into town. But Nines’s tough, cool, Devil-may-care persona outs itself as a protective shell, too… and this is another thing I think Troika handled so subtly and so well.

You’ll notice that even Nines’s voice is dramatically different in a couple different situations: when Ming Xiao is borrowing his body, when he’s afraid, and when he’s distracted or deeply disturbed. (A successful Malkavian mind read will really slam a crack in his coolguy persona. For a second, the nonchalance shatters and he childishly screams SHUT UP!)

But whether you Malk him or not: In those isolated moments, the Coolguy Nines Rodriguez we normally see frays. Physically, even! His accent loses its burr (that ballsy rural American everyman accent), shoots up to a higher register—and reveals a much softer voice than the one he uses in front of other people. No wonder; part of Nines’s charisma comes from his performance of masculine confidence, and even if it’s not a toxically patriarchal masculinity in the way we often picture it, the fact this performance cracks at all shows it’s not his genuine self. He’s acting. In the way a lot of toughguy men do—but for Nines, whose survival depends upon attraction now, he’s acting toughguy for his very life.

I think those little fray-under-pressure moments are the “real” Nines, or as close as we’re going to get: scared, desperate, worn-down, and very aware of his doom.

Now, all that said…

BLATANT FALLEN REBEL CONCEPT APOLOGISM

I don’t think we can quite throw Rodriguez into the same Mean Monster Morality Dungeon for Evil Vampires as other Big Bads in LA. This is where motivation comes into play, at least for me. We know Nines can be merciless and violent, and he doesn’t hesitate to sacrifice his own soldiers (namely, um, US!) to protect his holdings. But he does seem to have a twinge of genuine anger over injustices wrought upon “little people” (look no further than Nocturne)—one that seems like it stems from a sense of right v. wrong rather than sheer pragmatism. This stands in stark opposition to the rationed pacificism of characters like LaCroix, who simply doesn’t want the headache of cleaning up a pile of dead humans on his nightly to-do list.

Nines also, of course, just doesn’t have the same kind of disaster reach other Bloodlines Big Bads do in how much harm he can cause. When LaCroix gets up to some bullshit, he crashes the national economy. Nines, like, crashes a car into a corporate office window or takes over a street or something. Can’t really compare the two when it comes to the scale of damage done.

And even Nines Rodriguez is, for all his strategy, still an honestly angry person. Not all of him is fake—what’s troubling about him is what he’s willing to sacrifice and do to satiate his anger-passion. It’s the standard Brujah emotional-moral struggle. Even though I agree with much of what he says about bloodsucking late capitalist vampires (tbh he seems to hate vampires in general!), one wonders if it’s not partially the anger-passion that’s warped him into the façade of a noble leader he’s become. It’s not a pure anger anymore; he’s weaponized it in selfish, unhealthy, destructive ways.

But if he’s a fallen rebel—and since he is still apparently capable of some genuine anger and sadness—then we can infer he wasn’t always like this. He fell, and narratively, that’s key to understanding Clan Brujah. Maybe he fell in a way all of us angry rebel-types risk falling if we let our hatred of the bloodsuckers in real life outgrow and consume our care for the real-world little people.

I think we also have to appreciate that—as far as we know—the shady shit Nines does, he primarily does to prolong his power. But for a threatened Anarch like Nines, power doesn’t mean expansion or accumulation as it might for an ascending Ventrue; it primarily means survival. The Camarilla and Kuei-jin incursions into LA have numbered his days, and he can’t possibly have any delusions about this, no matter how much he swaggers. So he does what he can do with the skills and limited resources he has. He corrupts vulnerable, angry, abused people by giving them the appearance of friendship, family, and hope they can become stronger—much like effective gang leaders do.

If he’s morally nastier than other power-players like LaCroix in some way, imo, it’s here. It’s the intimacy with which he manipulates the people around him. LaCroix may lie to you; Strauss may withhold information from you; Ming Xiao may double-cross you. But none of them ask that you love them. That’s not their goal; that’s not how they operate. None of them expect or encourage anyone to happily die for them of their own free will. If they get you killed, you’ll die resenting them—resenting that you had to die, at all.

But when you die for people like Nines Rodriguez, you do it willingly, if only because you believed he cared somehow and that he’d fight tooth-and-nail for you, too. You believed that you were a member of his little outcast family—or that you would be, if you just proved yourself a little bit more. If you just fought a little harder. If you were just a little happier about having the chance to die for the cause. Maybe if you die for Nines, then Nines will love you, too.

I don’t think he does. I don’t think he will. If he’s a true fallen rebel archetype, I don’t know if he can anymore.

That’s enough Anarchs for now! I’m gonna peace out with some copy/pasted lyrics from the theme song of Nines’s den: the ballad of the charming and vengeful Lecher Bitch. Stay sharp, my little Bloodlines fanatics!

Tell me your story Don't worry, I've been there Crown me your savior Don't worry, I'll be there

[Chorus] I said hey You're coming all the way I've got some hell to pay I'm diggin' all the way All the way down I said hey You're coming all the way I've got some hell to pay Gonna rip you every way On the way down again [Bridge] Don't belong lording above me Won't be hard to pull you underground It won't be long 'til you love me And I'll be coming at your back To break it down

[ad1thi]

two for the price of one | AU-gust Day 12: Crime AU

AU-gust masterlist

for @justsomeoneunordinary. general warnings that the beginning and ending of this fic are slightly nsfk, and that all characters are a bit OOC since it’s a mob-verse. i apologise for this being so late!!

//

Tony's got his chair turned away from the door. It's not a dramatics thing, though he doesn't really have any grounds if anyone suspected it wasn’t a dramatics thing, but in this particular instance, it wasn't a dramatics thing.

 It was a James has his tongue down Tony's throat and Sam is kissing his way down Tony's chest and he would like the illusion of privacy thing.

 Which, if anyone asked Tony, was a far better reason than the dramatics thing.

 Of course, it might've worked better if Tony had also locked the door, but in his defence, he wasn't exactly expecting to be ambushed by his lovers in the middle of lunch break.

 (Boyfriends? Boytoys? Bed-warmers? Tony wasn't quite sure what they were yet, but Sam's hand ghosts over his clothed dick and it's hard to dwell on these kinds of things when something like that happens)

 He pulls away from James - who smoothly shifts his lips to Tony's neck - just in time to watch Sam lean in and bite into his zipper with his teeth when they're rudely interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Tony!" Pepper says on the other side, and Tony groans - softly but firmly pushing both James and Sam away from him, "you better be decent when I come in!"

He spins his chair around, fixing the zipper off his dress pants and is half way through buttoning up his shirt when Pepper strides in, obviously tired of waiting. On either side of him, James and Sam go stiff - looking every bit the bodyguards that Tony ostensibly keeps them around to be.

Pepper looks at them, back at Tony where he's still adjusting the last of his shirt buttons, and pinches the bridge of her nose.

"You can't be sleeping with your employees," Pepper intones, "I thought we'd been over this already." They had, several times. She even made him attend a seminar on it.

"Technically," Tony says, giving up on the last button because it was being particularly obnoxious, "I don't pay them. So they aren't my employees."

"What do you mean you don't pay them? Tony why don't you pay your bodyguards?" Pepper's voice has taken on a shrill tone.

"Pepper, darling, light of my life," he reaches a hand out to placate her, "They eat out of my kitchen, they live under my roof, they sleep in my bed. What could they possibly need a salary for?"

Pepper mulls over that for a couple of seconds and Tony crows victoriously because he knows he's right. It's not the most ethical of arrangements, but then again - he's the Patriarch of the Italian Mob. Ethics aren't really much of his concern.

"If Mr Stark paid us," Sam pipes up, because he's never been one for keeping his mouth shut, "It would technically be prostitution. Seems safer not to pay us."

Pepper wrinkles her nose, "That's more than I ever needed to know about your sex life Tony." Tony raises his hands in mock surrender, "Not to put too fine a point to it, but you did literally put yourself in the middle of things."

He lets his eyes roam across her body appreciatively, more out of habit than actual interest, "Not that I'm complaining of course." Next to him, James tightens almost imperceptibly.

Tony sighs. Keeping everybody happy was a full time job. He wished his mother had told him what he was getting into before she decided to wrap herself around a tree. Contrary to popular belief, being the head of an organised crime syndicate was not all it was cracked up to be.

(The benefits were worth it though)

Almost reflexively, Sam reaches out and places his hand over James. He doesn't intertwine their fingers, but it lets it rest there - a comforting weight that makes James relax incrementally.

A part of Tony hates that he can't be the one to offer that sort of comfort, but they aren't there yet. Sam and James have years on him, he's still something new and shiny to the relationship.

"Pep-pot," he says with a sigh, "was there something you needed or have you decided to interrupt my lunch just to tell me off?"

Pepper shifts, and Tony can see her slipping into a more professional mood, "I came to warn you about a new federal investigation. Seems some rookie straight out of Quantico has his sights set on you."

"Oh?" Tony raises a singular eyebrow, "and here I thought I hired your Widow specifically for this purpose. To weed out any stalkers." He extends his hand anyway, so that she can pass over the file stuffed under her arm.

"Agent Coulson," he says out-loud as he thumbs it open, "someone needs to teach this man how to dress. This tie does not go with this shirt at all, the colours don't compliment each other."

James peers over his shoulder, "Would you like me to take care of him for you?". Tony turns to him with a speculative look, "I thought you said you didn't want to kill anymore."

"I wasn't thinking about killing him," James says in a mulish tone that implies that he was in fact, thinking about killing him, "just scaring him a little. Making him think I was going to kill him."

Tony runs a finger across the laminated photo, pondering James' offer. On the one hand, James scaring him into dropping the case would be the most agreeable option. On the other hand -

"Somehow he doesn't strike me as the kind of man who scares easily," he looks up at Pepper, "you said he was fresh out of the Academy? It takes balls to come after the Stark family when you're that green - which tells me that he's either very determined, or he knows more than he's letting on."

He hands over the file with a flourish, "Put Natasha on him. I want to know everything about him from the end of the month. Then I'll decide how we'll proceed."

When he looks back at James, his lips are curled downwards, and it takes Tony a second to realise that he's pouting.

"Aw baby," he runs a thumb against James' lips, "don't pout. It's unbecoming of you."

"I don't like the idea that people are out to get you," James says, and Tony hears the unsaid 'not when I can do something about it'.

"I'll be fine mi amore," he says softly, in a voice he reserves from when they have no company, "I've survived a lot worse than Agent Coulson."

James sniffs, but doesn't say anything in response. Tony takes that as his tactic agreement.

"I'll put Natasha on it as soon as she's back from Malibu," Pepper promises, "she should be in later tonight." She looks at the three of them with something that Tony can't decipher, and before he can ask her if there's anything else - she lets herself out.

Sam follows her to the door, locking it behind her and then turning to Tony with a predatory look, "I believe we were in the middle of something before Pepper interrupted."

Tony lets his legs fall open and his lips stretch into a smile, "Nothing gets by you, does it Falcon?"

"No," Sam drops to his knees, in between Tony's legs, just as James crowds up behind him, "No it doesn't."

Fin

[captainillogical]

Distant Lands Ch.17

Stranded on a planet with toxic conditions and nothing but the clothes on your back, your only means of survival lies within the gem that got you here in the first place.

Spinel/Reader

collab with my lovely wife @firstofficertightpants​

You're frozen. It's as if all your muscles and your brain decided to stop functioning altogether. You had so, so much to say to her, and yet you can't seem to form any words.

Her face hasn't changed - it's only been hours since you've seen her, but she's already been through several weeks without you. Without anyone. Her eyes study your face, roaming over your features and hair as if she’s looking at a ghost.

“Yeah,” Is all you can manage to say, still out of breath as you try to think of anything, anything to say to her. “I-”

"You’ve been alive?” She asks - cutting you off, voice full of disbelief, and the tired relief that you had seen in her eyes suddenly changes to something else.

“Spinel, I-”

“You’ve been alive this entire time?” She asks again, voice cracking. She blinks, and you see small tears forming in her eyes. Your stomach drops. Oh god, she can't be thinking..

"Yes, and no. Let me explain," You try, calmy, as panic starts to flood your brain.

"You.." She trails off, and you watch her face as she goes through several series of emotions - coming to some kind of conclusion in her mind. She blinks again, leaving her eyes closed for a second to steady herself, and when she opens her eyes again to look at you, her expression changes to one you haven’t seen on her in what feels like a very long time. "You left me here."

"Not intentionally!" You reply, horrified at her words. "Believe me, they took-"

"So you knew?" Her voice wavers, underlying anger in her tone. 

"You're not letting me explain myself!" You feel like you're about to throw up, this isn't how you wanted anything to go.

"What's there to EXPLAIN when all the facts are here, huh, Y/N?" She's shaking a little, and you can see the pent up frustration in her form. "You disappeared on me, letting me think you were dead FOR WEEKS, I-" She chokes on her words, balling her fist. 

"Spinel, I didn't DISAPPEAR," You say, taking a couple steps towards her, and reach towards her shaking fist to grasp it. "I'm trying to tell you that-" She suddenly grabs your wrist to stop you from touching her, and you feel your eyes widen in shock.

"I CAME SO CLOSE TO-" The sound of rapid footsteps interrupts her, and she whips her head over to the staircase.

"DON'T YOU TOUCH HER." You hear Steven angrily shout from behind you, and you freeze in place. This cannot be happening.

"Steven, wait-" 

"Y/N get away from her, now." You hear him materializing his shield in his hands.

"Universe." Spinel spits out with distaste, and drops your wrist like dead weight. "Of course you'd show up."

"Couldn't kill her the first time, so you're trying to finish her off now!?" He exclaims, rushing up to your side with his shield up. You're so mortified that you're speechless.

Spinel lowers her eyes to the teen, facial expression bordering on dangerous as she lifts her shaking fist. "Ya' wanna say that aga-"

"STOP!!!" You scream, because this is about to go very wrong, very quickly if you don't put a stop to it. "BOTH OF YOU."

"Y/N-"

"Steven, I need you to leave." You say bluntly, nerves blurring the edges of your vision. Steven angrily whips his face to yours.

"No, I don't trust her to-"

"To what, exactly, Universe? What do ya’ think I’m gonna do?” She interrupts him, face absolutely twisted with quiet anger.

"You said you trusted me. You're only making this worse." You look at him, as he's eye level with you. You're trying to be calm. "I'll meet you at the ship in a couple minutes."

"Yeah, I trust YOU. NOT HER." He says, pointing to Spinel aggravatedly. "And I'm not leaving until we're all leaving."

You want to scream. You literally have like, no choice in this. 

"I'm not going anywhere." Spinel says, and you turn to look at her. She's got her face angrily fixed on Steven's. 

"Fine with me." Steven retorts. You give him a particular look before turning back to Spinel.

"Spinel.." It comes out of you half-broken - this isn't what you wanted to happen at all. She looks over to you as she hears your voice. 

"I wanted you to come home with me." And maybe when you say it, it comes out small, and sort of pathetic sounding. Her tense shoulders visibly deflate a little at that, and her eyes look at you vulnerably - she looks like she wants to say so much, but won't because of the other presence standing in the room.

"I.." She looks back over to Steven, and lets out a small sigh. 

"I wasn't going to take no for an answer." You say, and when her eyes meet yours again, the emotion you feel behind her gaze makes you want to hug her desperately. 

But you have a feeling that it would be best saved for a time where Steven wasn't also present. You also need to talk to him alone, but.. god. This is all too much for you, honestly. You know you’re barely hanging on by a thread here, but you’re trying your hardest to save your meltdown for when you’re alone. You haven’t had a chance to er.. really think about everything that’s happened to you in the last two to three days.

Steven clears his throat. “Can we go?”

“Let me explain everything on the way back home?” You say, still looking at Spinel and not even regarding Steven. “It’s a.. lot.”

She looks at you hesitantly, body language stiff as all hell with a scowl on her lips.

“Fine.” She says curtly, with a shrug. 

Steven de-materializes his shield in hand, and turns around to head back down the staircase behind him. You move to follow him - but not before looking back at Spinel, who’s standing there awkwardly.

She opens her mouth to say something, but upon seeing Steven stop on the staircase to glance back at you two she closes it abruptly - brushing past you instead. You wish so badly to be able to stop time to talk to her right now, just the two of you. But you know that you’ll have time - all the time you need after this, and you’ll be safe and at home. You just hope she doesn’t hate you.

-

She mainly sticks pretty close to you as the three of you walk back in near silence. In any other circumstance you’d joke with her that she’s becoming clingy, but her body language is unlike how you’ve ever really seen her. She’s uncomfortable and angry, that much you can tell just by knowing her. There's also nervousness as well. She’s not keen on walking anywhere near Steven, understandably.. You don’t know how you’re going to get past this second impression they now have of each other, but you should probably sort that before he tries telling the others some kind of.. misunderstanding. This doesn’t need to be even more complicated.

“Before we get to the others, Steven..” You say, glancing at him while walking briskly. You will not miss the jungle here, or any of this planet. He turns his face towards you.

“Yeah?” He answers. You feel Spinel’s arm brush against yours.

“What you saw back there wasn’t an altercation. You just walked up at like, the worst possible moment. Spinel wouldn’t lay a hand on me, I want to make this clear.” You see her take a small glance at you -  she seems to be almost surprised at your words.

“Yeah, I came to that conclusion about five minutes ago.” He says, glancing at you. “If she really wanted to she would’ve tried attacking us by now - before we got back to the gems, you know, because tactically she’d have the advantage.”

“I would’ve done it up on the Spire, actually.” She speaks up from beside you. 

"Hey, what. Don't say that." You retort. "I'm trying to defend you, here."

She gives you a noncommittal shrug. “It’s not like I was gonna hurt anyone.”

"I know that, Spinel. It's just, none of them do." 

"Well, we're pretty close to the ship now." Steven interjects, and you can see the pink of the ship through the trees. Finally. "Anything left here that you need to grab before we go?"

"I grabbed the only thing that mattered, I'm good. Let's just get outta here." You say, and you can see Spinel sparing a glance at your face.

"This planet doesn't seem that bad, honestly." Steven says casually, looking up at the night sky. You can see the others waiting outside the ship now, and they're all looking in your direction.

"You weren't stuck here for a month." You retort. 

"Fair point." He says, and by the time you get over to the others you're already calming down your nerves about the other gems and Spinel. You hope no more misunderstandings happen. It's weird, how all this has gone down. You were honestly hoping that you'd get a better chance at an introduction, but this is kind of on par for your life at this point.

"Y'all ready?" Amethyst half yells out, hand on her hip in a relaxed pose. "Pearl's got the ship on standby."

"Please." You say tiredly. Garnet nods at you, turning around and stepping inside the ship. The rest of them walk in, and you turn to see Spinel standing there hesitantly, looking at the entrance. 

"You're coming, right?" You ask her.

"Yeah.. it's just been a while, seeing this thing up close." She says, looking up at the entirety of the height of the ship.

"It's just this once, if it makes you feel any better." You take a long last look at the planet around you, and flip the sky off. It makes you feel a weird sense of accomplishment. Fuck these moons, fuck this sun, fuck this whole place. "Better than being stuck here."

"You're right on that." She says, brushing past you and entering the ship, you trailing right behind her. 

You hear the doors hiss shut behind you.

-

"So." Garnet says, crossing her arms over her chest and looking at you. Pearl's typing something on the console in front of her.

"Uh, yeah.." You glance over to Spinel, who looks completely out of place beside you. "Let's start over. This is Spinel."

"We know that, dingus." Amethyst chuckles.

"Yeah, well, there's no more murder plot, so let's clear that off the table." You reply, feeling a lot of relief drain from your body as you see you've left Golgotha's atmosphere entirely.

"For her, maybe." Pearl pipes in, not even turning around. "There's still always gonna be others out there that want to kill Steven."

"She doesn't seem like she's consumed by anger anymore, regardless." Garnet says calmly, leaning on the wall behind her casually.

"I'm right here." She looks over to them irritably.

"Well, you already know who I am." Steven looks over to her, eyes trailing to the gem on her chest. "For the record, I'm really, really sorry about what my mom did to you. Y/N told us all about it."

"It's.. fine." She says with a shrug, face thoughtful as she regards him. She still seems a little off to you, but it's not like you can just pull her aside and talk with her. "I've had some time to think it over, and while I maybe would've done things a bit differently, that's in the past now."

"Wow, if only Pearl could've got over her that quickly." 

"Amethyst!" Pearl squawks from the computer, face whipping around - expression wholly offended.

"...and I'm Garnet." Garnet says with a little smile, and you feel like smacking your face against the side of the ship to escape this. 

There's utter silence for a beat or two, and you can see Steven's face trying to not laugh at that as he pulls a hand up to rub at his forehead. You hear a small snort off to your side, and you whip your head over to Spinel, who's shaking a little trying to keep in laughter. You feel something like relief blossom inside you.

"You guys are ridiculous. Of course she'd keep you as friends." She says, and strangely enough, there's no bitterness in her tone like you'd expect. 

"Normally I'd be insulted by that, but I'll take it as a compliment." Amethyst grins at Spinel. "But enough about us. I wanna hear about what you guys did on this planet for that long without killing each other."

"We were mainly concerned with trying to find a way off, actually. That, and exploring the mystery of the disappearance of those previous gems." Spinel replies.

"We wouldn't have had to find a way off if you hadn't destroyed the warp pad in the first place, but, I digress." You hear your voice ring out throughout this ship’s main control room.

"I wouldn't have had to destroy the warp pad if I wasn't watching my live bait try to escape me." She whips her face to you, narrowing her eyes a little.

"Don't call me live bait, you ass! And if you were a smarter gem, you would've realized that humans can't even use the warp pad by themselves." You retort. "You played yourself."

"How was I supposed to know that?" She scoffs. "Tech goes through many changes after a few thousand years!"

"Wow, you guys really get along." Amethyst chuckles, watching the both of you in amusement. 

"I would like to hear more about what you guys found on the surface, actually." Pearl brings a finger to her lip in question. "You mentioned the existence of the gem eater earlier, but how did you two not realise it was there sooner? Did it not make any noise? Considering the condition you were in when we picked you up, I’d figure it would’ve made itself obvious.."

"It was pretty quiet, actually.. aside from those quakes.." You trail off, realizing something. "Spinel, remember that night on the hill?"

She looks at you for a second, as if she doesn't understand what you're saying, and then you see her eyes light up when she understands what exactly you're implying.

"Oh god, and that day in the kindergarten." She replies, putting a hand to her mouth in slight shock. 

"And you wanted to go in! Remember!?" Jesus christ, you're never going to doubt your gut instinct ever again. You both could've died then.

"Well, I'm glad your stubbornness really paid off there." She crosses her arms, sighing. "Otherwise, well.. you know. Anyway, before anything else, you said you'd explain what happened before.. and I haven't even gotten an explanation as to why you're pink."

You feel yourself choke for a second, almost forgetting what you look like now. "Right. I've been trying to get there. It's a lot to take in. What did you last remember?"

"Before that thing went flying off the cliff? Only that you had said the air was affecting me."

"Yeah, you have no idea. Made you completely useless, Spinel. I'm pretty sure it was some kinda pheromone to lure gems in."

"Huh, it did smell kinda weird.." She furrows her eyebrows, clearly thinking. "I hate that I was sort of right about it being a monster."

"You guys had no other clues?" Steven asks.

"No, as I said, the data logs were pretty corrupted."

"Yeah we were basically sitting blind, there." Spinel confirms, looking around at everyone. "I tried to restore it, but wasn't very lucky."

"Anyway, we walked into its nest, Spinel. You almost got me killed several times in there. That thing was blind and stupid like a bull, probably from sitting down there for thousands of years.."

"..and we brought dinner right to it." She stares at you, blinking.

"Yup." You say.

"We're so stupid." She shakes her head in disbelief.

"You’re telling me. How do you think I felt when I realized where we were standing?” You sigh. “All the injectors were piled in there as well. The thing probably drank from them like some kinda fucked up juice box, ugh, it was awful. And the worst part was, I had to realize by myself that it ate all those missing gems, and that’s why the cave walls were so sparkly. Grinded gems into wall paste, how fucked up is that?”

Spinel looks at you, brows drawn forward in horror as everything you just said sets in.

“It grinded them into dust?” Amethyst chimes in, voice full of disgust.

“That’s pretty terrible.” Garnet shakes her head slowly. “I’m sorry you had to deal with that alone.”

“You saved my life.” Spinel stares at you, expression almost strange.

“Twice.” You reply. “I’m going to have nightmares for that.”

"So when I came to, that's when you, er-" She stumbles on her words, getting this weird look in her eyes as she rips her gaze from yours. "-pushed me, and it slid off the cliff."

"It fell to its death?” Pearl looks at you, perplexed. “With a wound that size, I was expecting you to tell us something a little more.. dramatic than that.”

“Look, it was coming very fast, and I had to think quickly. I just wasn’t expecting the tail end of it to whip around and pierce me like a kabob, you know?” You say, and Steven gives you a funny look.

“Y/N, don’t ever say it like that again, it’s too soon.” He shakes his head, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Today has really been taking its toll on me.”

“You’re telling me.” You return the look Steven gives you, a bit more flatly. “Regardless, after that Spinel tried taking me back to the Spire, but I was bleeding so much that I made her stop to set me down before I bled out.”

“And that’s where we found you, dying.” He sighs, and you can see how tired he is. “I’m still kind of shaken up about it.”

“Ehh, buddy, she’s fine.” Amethyst says casually, putting her hands on her hips in a resting position. Steven gives her a pained face.

“She died. I thought she wasn’t going to wake up, it’s not li-”

“Wait.” Spinel interjects, her face looking distraught. “What do you mean she died, she-” She abruptly stops herself, silence ringing out around the room as she moves into your personal space - grabbing your shirt to lift up and look at the scar on your stomach.

“-SPINEL!” You hiss out, slapping her hands down and pulling your shirt back. She isn’t phased though, and her face is utterly confused.

“Why does..”

“I have healing powers.” Steven says bluntly. Spinel’s eyes trail back up to yours, and she’s got this look in her eye you can’t quite place.

“You would’ve died.” She says it almost quietly, like she’s trying to wrap her head around it.

“I did die, Spinel.” You watch her eyes as they waver between yours, and you can see one of her hands trembling.

“But you still sent me to get those supplies.. was.. was I gonna come back to your b-”

“Let’s not dwell on all the ‘what if’s’ today.” You say, stopping her from going down that particular thought path, unable to honestly even think about that. You’d rather not spontaneously burst into tears right here, right now, in front of everyone. “Hm.. I haven’t actually told any of you this, but..”

Steven looks at you - like he’s worried you’re going to die right now on the spot you’re standing in.

“Before I woke up, earlier.. I had this really, really fucking weird dream. Steven, I think I saw your mom? Her voice sounded a bit like the one from your tape - you know the one. And I was in this endless pink field? It was fucking weird.”

Steven stares at you.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” You ask him, feeling a little odd.

“Was there a tree on a hill?” He asks you back, face unchanging.

“Uh.” You say. “Yeah?”

“Huh.” He makes a face, perturbed. “Maybe I should ask Lars about that when we get back.”

“Why?” You blink at him.

“Because that wasn’t a dream, and I think you spoke to my mom. Which is weird.” 

“Okay, I’m not even gonna ask what that’s all about, because I wanna know why you guys keep actin’ like all this just happened in the last day.” Spinel spits out in frustration, looking like she’s about to start pacing.

“It did.” Pearl speaks up from over by the console, turning her face to look at Spinel. “We didn’t realize it at the time when we came to pick up Y/N, but that planet you decided to warp to, Golgotha? It runs at a much faster time on the surface.”

“What.” Spinel asks, more confused now than ever. “What does that mean?” 

“For the rest of us, you only came to attack Steven and kidnap Y/N just this morning.” Pearl says, brows drawn curiously. “You poofed Amethyst, and she took her sweet time coming back earlier.”

“Hey!” Amethyst throws a glare at Pearl several feet away.

Spinel looks off to the side, suddenly quiet and unmoving.

“I last saw you just a few hours ago, so everything is still fresh in my mind..” You trail off, watching her. You think she’s having a difficult time processing this.

“Y/N went a little crazy there when she found out about it actually, and demanded that we come get you immediately. I haven’t seen her like that in a loooong time, haha.” Steven says with a half-hearted laugh, trying to lighten the mood.

“She even threatened to steal a ship to come get you if we didn't.” You feel a little like Garnet is implying something with the way she says that, but you ignore it. Or maybe it’s because you can tell when she’s trying to hide a smile.

Spinel lifts her face slightly - eyes trailing over to yours, settling there. The room isn’t cold, far from it actually -  you’re pretty warm, and yet you feel goosebumps on your arms. Her gaze lingers there, giving you a long hard look. You know her enough by now to be able to tell that she’s hiding a lot of emotion for some reason, but you can see it in the way she looks at you softly. Your heart hurts. You want to hug her.

“So you.. didn’t just forget about me there.” She says, and it comes out hesitant and quiet. Her eyes are still locked with yours.

“No. I would never.” You hear yourself say with a shake of your head, and you mean it. She looks like she’s about to say something but stops herself - taking in a breath instead, and tearing her eyes away from yours as you see a swell of emotion in her gaze.

“Soooooo. Not to ruin a moment, but like, but where is Spinel going to stay? I really can’t wait to go home and pass out and stuff, today has kinda blown, not gonna lie.” Amethyst says casually, blowing a piece of her hair out of her face.

“Oh, you’re right.” Steven crosses his arms, chewing his lip in thought. “I hadn’t thought of that. She can stay on the couch tonight, and I’ll go talk to Bismuth and the others about getting her a place to live in. That is, if she wants to be on Earth.”

Spinel looks over to Steven, slightly confused. “What’s my other option?”

“You could go back to Homeworld.” He offers.

“I think I’ll stay on Earth for a while. I’ve got a couple things I’d like to do.” She replies with minimal thought to it, looking right at you. You feel a little like the others seem to notice this, and you feel a bit self conscious about it. 

“A lot of gems came over to Earth once they got the freedom to. I think you’ll like it.” Steven says, a small smile forming on his lips.

“Yeah Earth’s alright.” Amethyst shrugs.

“Y/N told me a bit about Little Homeworld, back on Golgotha.” Spinel says. “Said you had quite a few classes.”

“Did she now?” Steven eyes you with a slight grin, making you nervous. “I knew she was proud of it, even if she acted like helping me plan some of the classes was a chore.”

“I sooo did not.” You reply to him, offended.

“We’ll be back on Earth in five minutes, by the way.” Pearl taps on the console in front of her.

“You totally did! Anyway, Spinel, there’s a few I have in mind that you might find yourself benefitting from, if you want any suggestions.” You feel like Steven’s about to pull out one of the pamphlets, so you put a hand up to stop him.

“We can sort out the fine details later, I’m too tired to think about all of this right now,” You say with a sigh, utterly exhausted. You think you deserve some sleep after all of this.

“She’s right, we have time.” Steven stretches his arms over his head and yawns loudly. “And I’m utterly beat from today. If this could not happen again for a while, that’d be great.” Spinel gives him a small guilty face at that.

“Yeah, you know anyone else that Pink pissed off?” Amethyst says bluntly.

“Amethyst.” You nearly spit out. “You can’t just ask that.”

“What, it’s a valid question.” She shrugs, rolling her eyes. 

You hear Spinel stifle a snort, and when Steven starts to chuckle the rest of them start to laugh, giggles filling the ship’s main deck. 

You sigh, unable to stop the small smile that’s starting to spread across your face. 

Maybe things will be okay.

-

By the time you get off the ship and the rest of them have dispersed into their rooms to rest, it leaves just you, Spinel and Steven in the living room together. 

“The bathroom’s right there if you need it for some reason, just let me go grab my spare blankets for you realll quick.” Steven points to the bathroom door as he walks over to the utility closet, pulling out his favorite spares. “I don’t know if you sleep, a lot of gems don’t. Pearl doesn’t, and Garnet’s more of a.. meditator. But the couch is comfy enough until we can get you your own place tomorrow.”

“You guys are doing too much for me, and it’s honestly more than I deserve.” Spinel says, watching him as he walks back over, setting the blankets down on the nearest couch cushion.

“Hey, don’t say that. If I had that attitude for all other gems that tried to kill me, I wouldn’t be friends with Bismuth, Peridot and Lapis. And er, Pearl in some cases too..” He trails off, furrowing his eyebrows in thought. He shakes his head, as if to clear it. “Anyway, I wanted to apologize for earlier. I might’ve rushed into thinking the worst possible thing immediately, and that’s unfair to you, Spinel.”

“I..” She looks kind of speechless, like she wasn’t expecting that from him at all. “Well, it’s not like I gave you any reason to think anything else from me. You don’t need to be sorry.”

“I don’t like leaving things unsaid.” He replies with a grin. “I’m going to go pass out before my body does it for me, right here. Try not to be loud if you get curious and explore my house, I’ll be sleeping over there.” He points to his loft bed, a single eyebrow raised. “Peridot’s woken me enough times in the middle of a deep sleep, my body’s reaction is to just start throwing things at noise now.”

“Yeah, he’s thrown things at me when I’ve accidentally tripped going to the bathroom.” You say with disdain, giving him a face.

“Blame Peridot!” He grins, turning around to walk up his stairs. “Anyway, goodnight you two! And Y/N I swear to god you better get some sleep. You guys can talk in the morning.” He shoots one last glare at you before you see him disappear into his covers.

You look over to Spinel, and she’s already over by the couch. The house is quiet now, moonlight coming in through the windows, early morning approaching probably in another hour or so. She sits down, looking out of the window towards the ocean. You watch her dark silhouette and you feel some kind of weight lift from your shoulders, taking comfort in the fact that she’s right here, and she’s safe. She seems almost small here in Steven’s living room, and you wonder how this is the same angry, violent gem you met weeks ago. 

Yesterday, technically. You don’t want to think about that anymore.

You stand there unmoving, tired. She looks back over you, and you feel all the energy drain out of your body, shoulders sagging. You take a deep breath, letting the air drain out of your lungs slowly. 

You want to say something. 

Anything. 

You stare at each other. She blinks, and you can see her pupils trail over the details of your face as if she’s trying to memorize it. She opens her mouth slightly, clearly she’s trying to say something - but she closes her mouth instead. She looks away, momentarily, and you can see that she’s looking over in Steven’s direction. 

Her gem shines in the dark of the room, and your eyes want to stay fixated on it. 

She looks back over to you - taking a deep breath and exhaling it ever so slowly, chest moving with it.

“Y/N.” She says, very quietly, and you can see her wringing her hands nervously. You can hear your own heart beating in your ears. Your heart and brain are screaming at each other right now, but you can’t hear the words.

“I’m going to sleep.” You say, turning around to go to your room like some kind of fucking idiot.