#for fear of being seen and misunderstood and hated for who you are

[inhumanfuckingdogman]

maybe its not queercoding TO YOU. I get it though

[pistatsia]

OKAY so the only thing I want to say about yesterday's spoilers (Ness backstory) is that borderliner* Ness is canon now lol

✅ explosive anger

✅ feeling neglected, alone, misunderstood most of the time

✅ low self-esteem and the resulting self-hatred

✅ strong, overwhelming emotions

(feelings that can't be explained == too high (for average person) bursts of them. Inability to handle them)

✅ black and white thinking

(Isagi's either good (tosses to Kaiser) or bad (doesn't toss to Kaiser) lol)

✅ fear of abandonment + self-harm

✅ very intense, frequent, extreme emotional swings

(difference of one second)

(difference of one second pt.2)

✅ maladaptive daydreaming

✅ determining one's value through relationships with others

✅ unstable relationships

I'm really disappointed that chapter haven't shown Ness' attempts to gain his parents and siblings love but, eh, okay. I can work with that

*

A little background on who people with borderline personality disorder are and where do they come from. (Of course, each case is unique. I'm talking about the average manifestation of the disorder here.)

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a type of personality disorder in which a person is unstable, hypersensitive, highly anxious, and has no sense of self (no feeling of identity). One in ten patients end up committing suicide.

In fact, borderliners are people with no emotional skin. What for a stable person is a small domestic nuisance - for a borderliner is boundless terror, fear, a complete sense of helplessness and overwhelming self-loathing. Are you sick? It's your fault, you're worthless. You forgot your pass and had to buy an underground ticket? You're disgusting, step under a train right now. You forgot the food in the fridge and it spoilt? Don't you dare eat for another three days, punish yourself, cut yourself because you're nothing. That's not an exaggeration, it's true. And then you see an advert with a doggy and you laugh until you cry and all is fine.

It's like that dozens of times in one day.

Why do borderliners work this way? Heredity plays a role (which in Ness's case can be seen, for example, by the fact that he reacted acutely to some things even as a child), but to a greater extent, of course, the family, because when BPD is treated in the early stages, it is more easily reduced to remission (but does not disappear completely - it is like the core of the personality). Speaking of family types, typically borderliners come out of families with a narcissistic parent or the same borderline. Why exactly is that the case?

Because life with a narcissist/borderliner parent is an endless battlefield in which the child is forced to survive. Any emotion you have, if it doesn't fall under the parent's incomprehensible ideas, is repulsive. Any request you make and attempt to speak your mind is a violation of all laws and the worst offence. Today you're the golden child, tomorrow you're trash. Today your mom says she loves you, and tomorrow she blames you for divorcing your dad. Today dad likes the tea you made him, tomorrow he'll throw it in your face. It's a constant violation of personal space, an inability to have privacy, an impossibility to defend your interests - and yet a staggering neglect, a removal of the child from your life. Parents in such families usually divide their children into "golden" and "outcast" children, emphasising in every possible way how terrible the lousy sheep of the family (the outcast child) is, and encouraging bullying by their siblings.

Sounds similar to Ness's story, doesn't it?

In such families, the child by the age of 6 or 7 already knows that he is disgusting, horrible, and must do anything to avoid being abandoned - because the parents emphasise in every possible way that he is horrible, but they (for now) keep him out of mercy. A child learns by the slightest movement of the eyebrows and corner of the mouth to know when mom loves you and when she hates you, when dad is good and when he's bad.

The childhood of such children is a battlefield, and they come out of it emotionally disabled. For example, a very common consequence of living in such a family, in addition to BPD, is PTSD. Yeah, like war veterans.

(and by the way, borderliners VERY often end up paired with… Narcissists. Because it's a familiar love-hate game. And on top of that, also a beautiful (non-existent) personality to take a bite out of for your non-existent self))

-------

(if it seems like I'm somehow writing about borderline disorder a bit too unkindly - I love Ness and sympathise with him. It's me whom I don't love lol)

[lilliths-httyd-blog]

Why not watch Race to the Edge? We have:

The neurodivergent guy who's just so tired. Threw himself off a cliff once or twice. Likes dragons soooooo much and everyone just rolls with it. His entire life revolves around his hyperfixation (dragons) and it kind of bleeds into everyone elses life.

The neurodivergent guy's best friend cat. Does not like it when neurodivergent guy puts himself in dangerous situations and frequently sasses him for it. Is often seen batting around balls of paper for fun. Has killed an unfathomable amount of people and will kill again.

The token girlfriend who wasn't actually a token girlfriend in the show and had an actual personality and hobbies and insecurities and stuff. Has anger issues and will take it out on the twink at the slightest provocation. Probably more worthy of being chief than the chiefs own heir at this point in time. Secretly feminine. The superior version of this character and everyone loves her.

The twink. Used to be one of the jocks in high school and turned out to be the most flamboyant and feminine of the squad. Wrote a book once. Probably to impress the nerd like he's so gay for the nerd. Loves baby dragons like sooooo much he will cuddle them all day. A little sassypants who pouts and complains a lot. Is not good at following instructions. Will sacrifice life and limb for his friends and almost died for them several times.

The twink's self insert oc. He larps as a Coachella kid. Once fooled the smartest man in the world into thinking he was actually a Coachella kid. Deep in his heart he is just a misunderstood rich white boy.

The nerd. Reads books to the point where the universe decided every almost single one of his spotlight episodes would be a parody of a book. He made dragon trading cards once because he's a fucking nerd. Is probably a licensed doctor and if he's not then nobody's noticed yet. Is a total helicopter parent over his fucking dragon who spews lava and has a tail-bludgeon so who knows whats going on in his head.

The twink made a self insert OC for his boyfriend the nerd and then there were some hypnotism hijinks. I want to see God Complex and Coachella Kid interact so bad.

The resident drag queen. A scholar, philosopher and fashionista who would do a dramatic reading of Dante's Divine Comedy for fun. Has a pet chicken who he has a... questionable relationship with. Has a mace who he also has a... questionable relationship with. Doesn't know how to do math.

The resident pyromaniac. Has literally no fear and will actively dare people to kill her. Has not once been killed so it seems to be working. Will be captured and spend her entire time in captivity mercilessly bullying her captors. Could probably make Ryker Grimborn cry. Made Snotlout cry. Way smarter than she looks and is considered the smarter twin which is insane considering Tuffnut is a known genius.

The incredibly angsty Mary Sue. You either love her or hate her and I love her. Fits every single Mary Sue trope in existence to a T to the point where I feel like it was on purpose. Don't get me wrong though, she's a genuinely compelling character. Emo. I think that she should date Astrid.

[erinelliotc]

Some people (including myself) are Eddy apologists for this exact reason too- they can understand why he acts as he acts, where do come from his anger and insatisfaction with his life, and how he often gets a pretty unfair treatmente in some episodes (To Sir with Ed, Sorry Wrong Ed, X Marks the Ed, Who let The Ed In, The Good, The Bad and The Ed). On other side other characters (the kids) act just as bad as him and (almost) always come go unpunished. There several years ago Eddy got lots of hate, he was demonished and treated like a real monster and a sociopath by the fandom, devoid of any redeeming qualities. People who feel sympathy for him for his background and some of these episodes began to come to his defende and shows how he is a great character with a lot of good moments and a heart deep down.

Edd, on other side, always had the ''elite treament'', he was a angel, a perfect princess, who can do anything wrong in certain fans's eyes. Not to mention he pretty much overshadowed every other character on fanfics and fan arts, was everything about him. Another fans (usually Eddy fans) naturally got sick of this and started to push his flaws, the moments were he acted like a jerk, and how he's not above anyone on the show. And how not all his actions are (indeed) justifyable. Summing up, people were just sick of seeing Eddy being treated like a psychotic monster and Edd as the Jesus Christ figure.

Politely, just clarifying this to you. Good afternoon.

First of all, thanks for politely telling me all this! I wasn't really aware of all this because I only joined the fandom 5 months ago. And I totally get this, that's why I made the post. I saw some posts of people talking about those people who think Double D is an innocent little angel and I started to wonder if people think that about me, if I ever sounded like that, and I started to worry that someday I would sound like that in one of my future texts and videos talking about him. I hadn't thought about it when I made the post, but I hope it didn't come off as rude or an "attack" (???), I was just afraid that people would mistake me for one of those annoying people and just wanted to clarify that I'm not, because I really like this fandom and I don't want people to think that I'm annoying or that I make superficial analysis of the characters (because I personally think that oversimplifying Double D as good and Eddy as bad is something people do when they watch the show very superficially). I tend to be that type of person who feels the need to always clarify and justify myself for fear of others hating me, and also, I'm a little traumatized by Twitter where people tend to be very aggressive and mean to you for everything and assume things about you and not explain things to you etc etc... so I was a little anxious after making my post, afraid something like this might happen, but from everything I'm seeing, people on Tumblr seem so nice and kind in general. So I want to thank you again for being so kind and actually explaining the whole thing to me :)

Eddy is a character who's very easy to be wronged and misunderstood because he has great depth, several layers, insecurities and traumas that he covers with his false confidence and "jerky" attitude that he tries to copy from his brother. Obviously not justifying people treating him like a monster, just explaining that unfortunately we live in a world full of superficial people who aren't concerned with paying attention to details and stopping to really interpret and analyze things carefully and attentively, and understand that people are complex, characters are complex, and Eddy is a highly complex character. To these people, it ends up being more comfortable and convenient to just be content and cling to the character who, if seen superficially, is the "perfect little angel" who "suffers at the hands" of the "evil Eddy". I love analyzing and reflecting on things deeply, and it really irritates and frustrates me that people don't make the effort to do the same, and that happens in real life too. People quickly judge and have difficulty understanding that people are not simple and have different reasons for acting the way they do. I know it's hard to deal with people who act like jerks, I have a hard time myself, but I just wish there was a little more empathy in the world. That's one of the things Big Picture Show teaches us, right? Don't judge people because sometimes the jerk person is actually a very broken, insecure and frustrated person who just wants and needs to feel loved and accepted and doesn't really understand that. I think it's so important to learn that because it's true, sometimes people act mean not because they're actually mean, but because of so many other reasons that they themselves don't comprehend or don't want to show, and the "mean" disguise is just the way they found to defend themselves and survive.

I think (at least I hope?) it's noticeable in some of my posts that I also love Eddy (as a Double D kinnie I think it makes sense to be in love with him xD just an EddEddy joke to lighten up, but honestly I think people like Eddy are my type), I love analyzing and reading other people's analysis of his character and story, but my sympathy for him just grew in the last 5 months in fact, when I became hyperfixated on EEnE much more intensely than before and finally started to get to know about the whole story and characters. I even made a post once talking about thinking that he was my least favorite Ed, because before he actually was, but after rewatching the entire show now as an adult (the last time I watched I was a kid who didn't even understand a lot of the things that happened) and starting to analyze and read about it, now I'm very obsessed with him, I think his character is so interesting and deep, that he has the most interesting backstory and the best character development, and I even make more edits with him than with Double D (I think I tend to be obsessed with controversial and complex characters who are full of content to analyze from a psychological point of view like Eddy. A good example is Jinx from Arcane, I just love her character so much). I also recently realized that he's a lot like my brother, no wonder our mother often misunderstands him. But I get it, they (Eddy and my brother) are just people who are very hard to deal with because they carry several issues that you need to have good maturity and emotional structure to deal with, but it's so good when you can get to know a little more about them and help them get through these things when they open up and allow themselves to be discovered and helped.

Today I came across a post (which was honestly the trigger that made me make my post) from @eddfumo saying that they think Double D wants to be like Eddy in some way, and you know what? This is so true! I'll use my own experience to relate to him and explain him again, but anyway, I'm so envious of people/characters like Eddy. Even though they tend to irritate me and I even disapprove of many of their actions and decisions, they also have a determination, confidence (even if it's false, they're still able to act like confident people), attitude, audacity, strong personality, rebelliousness, extroversion and "not giving a shit" energy that I so wish I had too. I really admire these traits and I think Double D deep down does too (I like to headcanon him doing the same as I do and secretly fantasizing imaginary and hypothetical situations and discussions in which he acts more like Eddy, and he feels so good about himself afterwards, but feels frustrated that he doesn't have the nerve to do this outside of his imagination in real-life situations). Even though they have questionable morals, this type of person are so inspiring and you can still learn so much from them. It's no wonder Double D grows so much and becomes a more confident and less people-pleasing person because of Eddy's influence.

So yeah, it sucks when people simplify characters and see them as black and white, good and bad. The EEnE fandom is unfortunately not very big, but luckily here on Tumblr, at least currently, it's full of people who do in-depth analyses, and that makes me very happy!

EDIT (I'm editing to add one more thing because I forgot to mention another topic that complements what you said about the other kids acting badly too and not receiving any punishment): One of the many things I plan to do after rewatching the show a few more times to properly absorb everything (I need to rewatch things at least twice to really take it all. Plus, I rewatched it the first time with the Brazilian dub because nostalgia and now I want to rewatch it with the original lines) is count how many times the Eds do real scams. Because honestly, there are a lot of episodes where we can't really call what they're doing "scams" because they're not actually scamming anyone, they're just selling something honestly and without harming anyone, but things always go wrong even when they're not doing anything wrong (often because of the Kankers, for example) and this is frustrating as hell to Eddy.

Since I haven't rewatched everything twice yet (because I'm still in the process of subtitling the entire remastered version of the show to rewatch it properly because English isn't my first language), I don't remember all the episodes accurately and clearly. But the last one I subtitled was "In Like Ed" (season 2, episode 9), so it's the example I have freshest in mind, even if it's not the best one. I know, the Eds were inconvenient in this episode crashing Jimmy's party (even though I think it's so lame that they rarely get invited to anything because the kids exclude them), opening his presents and everything, but one thing that stuck in my mind was the fact that when Eddy opened the present in front of them and revealed the sewing machine, Jimmy just said: "I'm so misunderstood. I wanted a pony!". He didn't say anything about them ruining the surprise or anything, he just started crying and ran away because he didn't get a goddamn pony. He just complained about someone's present, despised the present right in front of the person, and all Kevin said was "There goes the birthday boy. You dorks wrecked another party!". Like?? Jimmy cried because he didn't get the present he wanted, and not because of the Eds. I could even consider the possibility of them giving him "preferential treatment" and ignoring him because he's younger, but there are times when Kevin doesn't give a shit about Jimmy being younger, like in "Know it All Ed" (season 2, episode 1) when he uses the squirt gun on him, mock him and call him "twerp". Anyway, regardless of being younger, he was so rude and no one gave a shit, and not only that but they even acted as if it was the Eds' fault that Jimmy cried and ran away.

So yeah! The kids (especially Kevin) always blame the Eds (especially Eddy) for everything that goes wrong, even when it's not really their fault. And as you said, they also act badly, but nothing happens to them.

[mask131]

There is one thing people should get more accustomed to: when talking about a piece of folklore, of legend, of superstition, of anything - it should become to norm the add a brief explanation about the "why" of the folklore or superstition. The cultural, religious or historical context that explain it. Because there are a lot of people who just repeat some specific facts about myths or legends without explaining why it was so in the context, and as a result people lose a lot of background info needed to understand it.

For example, I'll invent an example: In France, an actor, a theater-performer, a comedian had much higher chances to become a vampire, just like people committing suicides. (I made this up, except for the suicide part, it was indeed believed people who died by suicide had a likely chance to return as vampires).

If people repeat this fact again and again because it was in the legend, in turn other people are going to say "Oh yes, being an actor was what caused the vampirism". When in fact no. Why would actors be more likely to become vampires? Because for centuries and centuries, in France, actors were not considered Christian people, were refused any right to be part of the Church or partake in religious rituals, and as such they were denied a proper grave in Christian soil, or a place into a cemetery. And thus just like suicides, they were buried in un-sacred, non-consecrated earth, outside of any proper funeral ritual - hence the threat of returning as an undead monster. [Note: While I invented the part about actors being vampires, the whole burial thing is actually true. Up until the late 18th century in France, actors were considered mortal sinners by virtue of doing theater, and thus they were refused all Christian rites and rituals, from weddings to funerals, and even the greatest and most beloved actors were thrown into large corpse-pits and unmarked crossroad-graves like vulgar criminals]

This is just an example, but this shows how an important thing when dealing with folklore and legendary beings and other traditions of various cultures is to place it back into the religious, social and historical context that explains it. Today a lot of people consider that blacksmiths should have been "good" people in terms of folkloric beliefs - because media popularized the idea for example of how iron was used to protect from fae, and how legendary blacksmiths forged the weapons of great heroes, and thus there is this tendency in folkloric-fiction to depict blacksmiths as these positive, helping figures. But a lot of people don't know that in some parts of Europe during specific centuries, blacksmiths were rather seen with suspicion, fear and dread if not hate - because due to them being these massive, powerful men wielding dangerous tools, due to them living by heat and fire and soot, due to them knowing a mysterious and hard craft some associated with things such as alchemy, there is a recurring belief that smiths were sorcerers, warlocks, or associated with the devil, or that they would return after their death as vampires.

But if you just say randomly "Oh yes, it was believed blacksmiths could return as vampires", people might read this as "It was the job of being a blacksmith that caused the vampirism", when in fact the real reason behind this belief was the smith's association with devilish/hellish elements like fire and flames and soot, and the equation of his secretive and marvelous craft with other mysterious prodigious arts like "magic". Hence a tradition of blacksmith-warlocks...

I have been using European vampire beliefs here, but the same can be applied to anything. Someone who doesn't know about the concept of "hubris" will misunderstood half of Greek mythology. Someone who doesn't know what is wrong with being "effeminate" in Old Norse society will miss half of the subtext of Norse mythology. Someone who doesn't know about the tradition of "Jack tales" will be quite puzzled upon finding so many folktales involving a "Jack"...

[layla4567]

Imagine with Loki

Warning: Slightly smut

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had been a long time since I moved to Asgard with Loki, it was my own decision and I don't regret it. Despite the complaints from my father Tony or my best friend Peter, I still went ahead accepting the consequences, even Thor, his own brother, warned me about what Loki was like, and although he supported me in my decision, he wanted me to be clear about what he told me. I would "cope" if I stayed with him. But in the end everything was not so bad, I was aware of how he really was and I knew that it would be difficult for me to adapt to his habits and his home.

Loki has a kind of avoidant attachment and of course daddy issues that results in a person who believes that he is not worthy of love or be loved and very distrustful. So it took me a lot to earn his trust and another extra effort for him to notice me. He seemed to want to get close to me at first but naturally jealous he would retreat if he saw me chatting with another guy, and that was another problem.

Luckily Thor helped me a lot to convince Loki that I stopped being so reluctant to have contact with me. And after having passed this first stage and after digging into that hard marble shell, I was able to discover a tender and kind background with a heart of gold. He opened up to me like no one ever has, he talked to me about his fears and insecurities, and I'm so proud of him for having overcome all of that, putting him aside so he could talk to me. I would like to be able to see the faces of those who didn't trust me when they saw this new Loki so I could say "I told you so!". Because he was never really mean, let's just say he was hurt and misunderstood.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

With all those thoughts and memories in mind I found myself in my room with my elbows resting on the edge of the wide balcony. The window was large and tall with amber silk curtains on the sides. A soft twilight breeze was blowing while I saw the horizon of all of Asgard, some Asgardians were still seen walking from here to there doing their work. Suddenly three knocks knocked on my door.

"Yes, come in"-I said

Loki appeared around the door frame timidly opening it as if he wanted not to disturb.

"Sorry to intrude, do you mind if I come in?"-He said as he slowly opened the door a little more.

"Please do, you weren't interrupting anything."-I said with a smile and a twinkle of tenderness in my eyes

He walked towards me with an elegant walk to end up next to me by the balcony.

"Everything in order darling?"

God I loved when he called me that

"Sure Loki, I was just admiring the view"

suddenly, almost without realizing it, I smile remembering something

Loki looks at me strangely and then fixes his gaze on the villagers who were visible from the window and then looks at me again confused

"And now what's so funny? I don't think Asgardians are hilarious enough to make you smile"-and he frowned

"Nothing love, I just remembered something"-and I started to giggle

"Oh it's nothing, all right. I guess if you don't want to tell me then I might tell Thor that you were the one who drew the Mjolnir on him with a marker that time"

I looked at him in surprise as I gasped

"Loki Laufeyson! Don't you dare!!"

"Do you want to bet dear? If I remember correctly the last time you lost"-he smiled mischievously

I went from shock to outrage, even though I couldn't really be mad at him, a small part of me was amused. That's why I decided to tickle him as a small revenge

"No wait Y/n I'm sorry I take it back!!"-his smirk faded in a second as he became serious imploring her to stop. He hated tickling

I didn't want to indulge him so I didn't stop right away. But when I did he seemed relieved.

"Ok, I'll tell you so you don't suffer anymore"-I laughed-"I just remembered that time I was trying to make friends in Asgard when I first arrived and I was talking to a couple of guys and one went out of his way to drop me hints so you approached them and told them the lady had some important business. while you took my arm and dragged me away from them, remember?"

He nodded with his eyes closed and a small embarrassing smile.

"How could I stoop so low for a Midgardian?"-while covering his face with his hand-"You had me spellbound and I didn't know how to react to that, didn't you mind what I did that day?"-and he looked at me with a trace of concern

"Of course not"-I grabbed his face with my hands- "in fact I found it cute. I understood that those were your ways of showing interest in me"-I laughed while looking at him tenderly

"Oh my beautiful Y/n, what did I do to deserve you?"-looking at me intensely

I couldn't resist and I stood on tiptoes to kiss his lips. He didn't have to beg and he kissed me back with even more energy.

then he encircled my waist with his arms, a pleasant shiver ran through my entire spine as I got up to be taller and thus encircle his waist with my legs. his kisses and caresses were strong but warm like burning coals that wrapped me whole. when our faces separated just 10 centimeters to catch our breath Loki looked at my eyes and lips with hunger

He held me firmly by the waist and gently placed me on the bed. from there Loki began to delicately kiss my neck making me shudder. It started from the top of my jaw to just below the shoulder as I closed my eyes enjoying his warm touch. Without realizing it, he began to untie my silk dress until it fell and slipped down my legs, leaving me in my underwear, With my semi-naked body, the Asgardian began to draw a path of wet kisses along and across my figure. Loki moved down my bust making a beeline for my belly button. His lips on my skin made me squirm and cling tightly to the sheets as I arched my back and his slow steps left me wanting more.

But when Loki reached the lower part of my belly, I let out a sigh of pleasure, throwing my head back. He seemed to like that because he smiled with that smile that made me blush and he kept going down a little more until he reached my thighs near my groin, and moving my underwear a little away he gently kissed the concave area between my privacy and my leg

"Loki.."-I couldn't hold it and I moaned his name weakly as I felt my groin throb desperately wanting more.

"I'm sorry but your silhouette is delicious my queen"-He began to take off his clothes, revealing a stocky torso, it was the body of a god

I bit my lips as a sign of desire, I wanted it for myself now

Now with his bare chest he began to kiss me passionately while encircling his neck with one hand and the other caressing his face. He grabbed my thigh and pulled it up to his waist so that I could encircle him.

I found the strength to whisper in his ear-"Now is my turn"

now Loki was under me and I sat astride his hips, I entertained myself contemplating his well-worked torso while caressing his stomach

I drew lines from top to bottom applying a little pressure from time to time as if it were a massage. Loki's skin seemed to tremble with every caress. I wanted to take it to another level and I began to swing my hips in circles back and forth as if I were performing a slow and sensual dance. He closed his eyes and opened his mouth in a silent moan, with each movement he made his breathing quickened and I could feel his property tight under me.

"Y/n..Please"-His voice sounded cracked due to excitement.

His pleas made me feel more feverish, so we quickly took off our remaining clothes, leaving them on the floor. The god of mischief took control again and now he was on top of me, sticking his body against mine, he pressed his hip against mine, belly to belly. I dug my nails into his broad back, scratching gently.

His thrusts were slow but precise, always following the same rhythm. Our breaths were getting faster and heavier, I could feel Loki panting in my ear and his breath warm. He was taking me to Eden in that room with 4 walls. The speed increased more and more and I sank more and more my claws into his skin making Loki tense his muscles and jaw. His hips collided with mine and our bodies beaded with sweat. I felt some pain but also euphoria, and the pleasure washed over the pain, like two waves crashing together. Yes, that was it, with each movement I felt like a wave was invading me, enveloping me and rocking me with force. My waist accompanied each movement of his, each thrust and withdrawal that he gave I accompanied him in his rhythm

The pleasure that enveloped us was so great that I couldn't concentrate my thoughts. At one point Loki detached himself from my body and held my thighs for a better grip. Now he, being incorporated, his thrusts were deeper. I clung to the sheets more fiercely to contain myself but let out small moans.

The atmosphere was passionate, the temperature rose and rose, the god of lies was giving everything and I responded complacently. Before reaching the climax, Loki begged me to say his name.

"Say my name... I want to hear you say that I'm yours.."-he said hoarsely almost in a whisper

I tilted my head back slightly arching my back.

"Loki!"-I released almost without strength and without being able to contain myself much more and sighed long and hard

Satisfied and tired as if a battle had been fought we snuggled up to each other with a sheet covering us poorly trying to catch our breath. Loki lying on his back with his torso still naked and I hugged him with an arm on his chest while he hugged me and caressed my hair and shoulder

"Loki, my love"

"Mmh?"-he murmured with his eyes closed as his breathing became calm

"I love you"

"I love you more darling"

He kissed my head and then we fell fast asleep

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

ok now I feel dirty and naughty :v (what the hell I just wrote?)

[myimaginarywonderland]

Do you sometimes rememeber how people have always tried to paint Lance and Esteban as some kind of evil kids who don't deserve to be in F1, even sometimes going so far as making them out to be Satan himself because of their driving?

And then you look at them and it's like this is them?

The guy who has time and time again donated to charity causes such as Canadian children's hospitals?

The dude who stopped in the road to pet a deer?

The guy who has always acknowledge his privilege while also talking about how much his relationship with his father is positively helping him as a driver and person?

The boy who has never been acknowledged for any of his achievements because people only contribute it to his parents wealth?

One of the only drivers who politely called our the FIA after Abu Dhabi?

And then there's the guy who came from nothing and has always voiced his support for how much his family helped?

The guy who instead of being made at the guy who he lost his seat to has continuously voiced his support for him?

The driver who has always looked up through every opportunity he was denied?

You sometimes think has these two drivers so unlike each other, one from a wealthy family who has never had to fear for his career and the other, who has fought every odd, has had everything thrown and taken from him, have formed one of if not the strongest most genuine friendship on the paddock?

They have always supported each other, lifted the other up, spoken about how they are great friends etc.

How these two guys who are so different and yet both undeserving of the hate they get, have found this sort of bond,a comfort with each other quiet unlike most friendships we have seen.

How both of them are so severely misjudged and they are always misunderstood, misinterpreted etc. yet they get each other, understand each other?

Yeah no,me neither.

[ghostgraveyard]

I feel like I need to clarify. I like the whole “The Jedi code is like an itch; their compassion leaves a trail.” thing but more as a ‘values that the best and most true Jedi hold’ and that sort of futile idealism people believe applies to the jedi as a whole.

But I hate when people take that line and use it as a reason to discount people arguing against the Jedi.

Like you need to see the difference between ideals and values vs action.

I love that u love ur jedi and what they stand for, but i need you to understand that the jedi actually SUCK and thats okay (for you to like them in spite of such). Stop trying to convince people of their goodness bc for sure, some of them are good, but that doesnt make them representative.

The jedi fell bc they were a working part of a corrupt system and u literally can’t take their responsibility for that away just bc u wunna hold their hand and giggle. Root for them but dont talk to anyone amidst your delusion where the meow meow jedi can do no wrong. Do you understand?

“Their compassion leaves a trail…its like an itch” and I would see so many people use it like “See? The jedi are peak perfection and good!” and im like, “No! They arent! Anakin’s entire origin story is a prime example as to why!”

This was unironically canon:

Anakin: tries to literally do the most for one ounce of approval

Obiwan: 😐 your desire for praise will be your undoing.

Anakin: 😦

Can you not see he is DESPERATE for something he’s done to be recognised. His inner child is begging to be seen. His outer child is doing its best to be worthy of it and every time he thinks “this is it, this time—“ he’s basically smited.

Anakin knows love and affection through the eyes of a slave. Blunt honesty and proof through care and being there (action) and staying through thick and thin. He doesn’t need you to burn down a planet because that’s HIS love language, thats how HE shows he cares, not how he needs others to show it.

Because he feels he’s not good enough—burning down a planet, in his mind, shows the people he cares for that he would do anything for them of it’s in his power to do so, and that he really means it when he says he loves them. Grand gestures are how HE shows love because he feels like anything else is as inadequate as he is

Being abandoned and never told he’s loved and cared for is a big reason his affections and attachments turn obsessive. He’s never been given anything concrete, he’s never shown that people care in a way he can understand. They think “I said hi to him and spoke up for him and trained him and gave him camaraderie—thats proof I love him” and think Anakin can properly differentiate it between duty and not.

He thinks, “my master is my master but he only cares for the Jedi and I can’t live without him but he could without me bc I’m a burden and will never be good enough or perfect like Obi-wan” bc Obi-wan isn’t honest with himself or Anakin, and you can see this etched into the very lines of his story no matter where you look.

He doesn’t say “i love you” to Anakin’s face until he’s literally chopped Anakin’s limbs off and left him to die on Mustafar, and even then it’s ambiguous. Anakin understands there is SOME sort of affection between him and Obi-wan that goes both ways but in the end, he never feels like he can truly tell Obi-wan anything without being shunned, misunderstood, or lectured, when all he needs is someone to talk to and hold close without fearing theyll leave him behind when he disappoints them.

One of the only people to ever outright tell Anakin what they feel was his mom, and she ended up dead bc Anakin was told he was being irrational about her and his visions of her death; and the fact that his mother was one of the only people to ever tell him she loved him and was proud, and that she was one of the only people who would never turn her back on him when he wasnt perfect (bc she thought he was perfect anyway. Her love for anakin was unconditional whereas everyone elses’ seemed to be very obviously conditional) and that terrified him bc following her death, the only other person left was Padmé, in their very unhealthy, very suspicious, co-dependant romance.

But even then, since she was the ONLY ONE he knew for sure how they felt, he was terrified something would happen to her and that she would leave him too—be it through death or finding someone to replace him (visions + irrationally believing she and Obi-wan were having an affair). He was obsessive and possessive and I honestly can’t blame him, especially from a psychological standpoint—and even more especially, from a child psychology standpoint. He was never given a reason or a chance to nurture any secure attachment style, especially when faced with the first 10 years of his life as a slave? Yikes.

He was obsessed with his relationships because he never had anything else to hold on to (from his perspective), and do you know who took gleeful advantage of that? Palpatine.

Anakin only wanted to be good enough, to make people proud, to give them a reason to tell him they love him. And maybe the one person he wanted to lure in the most was Obi-wan, who viciously shunned him for that, even when he would sparsely give anakin the praise he wanted so desperately

Anakin said, “I beat you! I won!” All giddy and self-assured after a spar with Obi-wan and instead of allowing that feeling of accomplishment, of the desire to make his master proud, Obi-wan just looked at him and said with shame, “Your need for praise will be your undoing,” and in the end, he wasn’t wrong. It was a self fulfilling prophecy.

Because in the end. The only person left who told Anakin he was proud was fucking slimy Palpatine, the dark lord of the goddamn sith.

Unfortunately, a lot of explicitly pro-jedi/jedi apologist fandom participants like to “interpret” the Jedi code themselves. They make these incredibly long-winded, well thought-out posts explaining the meaning and how it works in practice and how the jedi embody this—BUT they never actually consider or address the literal canon aspects. Things we actually see with our eyes: the novelisations, the games, the shows, the movies.

You’d think, therefore they must be, right? Wrong. You say this is what the Jedi are like and while that’s beautifully wonderful and I wish you were right—that’s literally not what happens. Literally not what they’re like at all. It’s actively part of the plot.

I think your interpretations of the code are great but you act like that’s the reality we’re actually living in. You act like that’s what the shows tell you, rather than just what you want to believe based on your own interpretation of the code itself (ignoring lack of congruency we sometimes see in the shows or movies).

My point is, you can love the jedi while acknowledging their VERY obvious flaws. The flaws that destroy them, corrupt them, misguide them, make them terrible people. The flaws that cannot be retconned by one writer saying “its an itch” while pretending Anakin’s “Anakin Skywalker is dead. I killed him” makes up for the horrible things Old Hermit Kenobi does with luke.

So yeah.

Lets at least be real when we’re loving who we love.

[reginaaxxwrites]

Death Eaters (Draco Malfoy)

Okay, I've done some research, and Parkinsons was not confirmed that they are Death Eaters but they do support You-Know-Who. Pansy was impressed that Draco had taken the Dark Mark. Also, you are Pansy's little sister.

Since this is a fanfiction... I'll change it a bit.

Warnings: mentions of suicide, death, torture, and blood.

*****

Draco Malfoy x Fem!Reader

*****

Sometimes, it's a curse to have Pansy as my sister. Being a Parkinson is a curse. It's a shame to be born into this family. I always knew that I was different from them. So, in my first year, my parents thought, even my sister, that I would end up in Slytherin.

But it turns out the sorting hat put me in Ravenclaw.

"Is it the nargles?" A sweet soft voice had erased my deep thoughts.

"Probably. How was your day, Luna?" I smiled at her.

"All good, thanks."

I continued to do my homework in silence while Luna was humming whilst scribbling something on her parchment paper. I'm sure that she wasn't doing her homework, but I let her do whatever she wants.

Everyone seemed to be gloomy ever since the term started. After the Ministry announced that You-Know-Who came back and fought Harry Potter. Some of my muggle friends didn't return because their parents are worried for their children's safety.

I knew that You-Know-Who returned in my third year. The moment Potter came back with Cedric Diggory's dead body. Fear shivered my whole body. I knew I had to be proud and happy that He was back. But I wasn't...unlike my family.

My eyes went to the Slytherin's table where I saw Pansy talking to Malfoy. Those two dated before and my sister would boast about it. Malfoy liked the attention but got tired of it. Despite that, Pansy would still go after him.

Since the term started, Malfoy's attitude changed. He became gloomy and more easily irritated than usual. I wasn't used to it. He would always tease me around, even when I visit the Malfoy Manor during holidays.

The thought came across in my head that his father was in Azkaban. It's probably the reason why he changed. I knew his father deserve it for his crimes. Mr. Malfoy was very fond of You-Know-Who, at least that's what my father told me. For me, his father only worships the Dark Lord out of fear.

"Is something wrong, Y/N?" Chang sat beside me as she opened her books and brings out her parchment paper, ink, and quill.

"Nothing. Just daydreaming..."

"Seems like you're troubled. And I can tell it's about a boy." She gave me a soft yet teasing smile. Cho is two years older than me. She was more like a sister to me than Pansy.

"He's been distant. I hate that Potter might be right about his suspicions about him." I placed my chin on the palm of my hand as I continue to do my assignment.

A bitter look was seen on Cho's face after I mentioned Potter's name. Those two also dated for a while. A soft laugh came out of my lips then she glared at me.

"Sorry." My grin never left my lips which made her groan and ignored me.

_

I was on my way back to our Common Room when I saw Draco. He was panicking and didn't know where to go. I would be lying if I said that I wasn't worried so I called his name. He looked at me with teary eyes. He was shaking. 

I didn't utter a word. He immediately wrapped me in his arms. We both kneel on the ground, still holding me tightly. I was surprised but I didn't question him. He buried his face in my chest. I slowly put my left hand on his back and my right hand on his hair. 

"I'm scared... I don't know what to do." His voice was trembling with fear. I held him close, letting him find comfort in my arms. 

This is the first time I see him like this. Draco also did some terrible things. But he grew up in a cruel family. He doesn't deserve this. He's misunderstood. Always has been.

"You need not say a word, Malfoy. Let it all out. I'm here..." I hold him tight in my arms like a child who's seeking refuge from his mother.

I wanted to question him. But I know he wouldn't tell me unless he's willing to. I don't know what he's been through. But I hope that somehow he can manage.

We stayed for as long that I can remember. Thank Merlin that it was already late at night. Most of the students must be already in their common room. 

_

After that night, Draco avoided me. He acts like nothing ever happened that night. I know I shouldn't care. But I'm also worried about him. 

I wanted to talk to him. And since Pansy is in Slytherin, I decided to approach my sister at the Great Hall to ask about Draco. As much as I hate to be seen or near my sister, it's the only way where Draco's whereabouts.

I went over to Slytherin's table and sat in front of my sister while I'm between Blaise and Theo. They were surprised to see me sitting with them. Since I never really got along with the Slytherins.

"Well, what do we have here?" Theo leaned at the table while he rests his hand on his cheek. I saw him grinning at me.

"What are you doing in here, Y/N? Ravenclaw's table is over there." Pansy looked at my house's table. "I'm looking for Malfoy. Have you seen him?" I asked her straightforwardly. I swear Theo's grin grew wide while Blaise smiled. Pansy raised her eyebrow at me.

"Why are you looking for him?" My sister asked. I didn't think this through. Of course, she'll ask. Because, weirdly, a Ravenclaw girl looks for a Slytherin boy who she barely talks to unless he teases her. Also, this girl is not on good terms with Slytherins.

"Does it matter?" 

"Why. are. you. looking. for. him. Y/N?" She demanded. I couldn't find any excuse for why I was looking for him. I am not going to tell her the exact reason because she'll further ask me more questions.

"Calm down, Pan. Perhaps little Y/N has a crush on Draco. Aren't you?" Theo teases. I glared at him.

"Shut it, Nott," I told him as he raised his hands as surrendered.

"He's somewhere in the castle. Maybe the Room of Requirements?" Blaise answered beside me.

Pansy hits his arm but not that hard. She returns her attention to me and examines me. 

"I don't know what you're up to. But stay away from him." She warned me. We stared at each other like we were competing. The first one to break their eye contact loses. We both look away at the same time when we heard Theo laugh.

"Damn, never saw the day that little Y/N looked so fierce until now. No offense, Pan. She looks way hotter than you." Theo flirted. He always flirted with me but I always brushed it off. He's a playboy.

"Piss off, Theo." Pansy hissed at him.

I stood up and was about to leave when I looked at Blaise. I don't where the Room of Requirements is located.

"It only appears when you need it the most." He answered as if he can read my mind. "But it's mostly located near the Astronomy Tower." 

"Thanks." And I continued to walk away.

_

I don't know why I was in a hurry to look for the room where he is. I kept walking and walking until a door appeared. My hands were shaking as I try to open the door. 

Why am I nervous? It's just Malfoy. 

Why am I determined to look for him?

Why do I care for him?

Why am I here? 

I stopped opening the door and turned around to walk away when I heard the door open.

"Y/N?" My heart skipped a beat. I turned to look at him. 

My softens as I look at his features. He looks tired and has a dark circle under his eyes. He doesn't get enough sleep. His hair which used to look neat is now messy just like the last time I saw him.

Just what is happening to him?

"Malfoy. I was just about to head to the Great Hall." I lied. He raised his eyebrow.

"The Great Hall is in the other way. What are you doing in here?" His voice was a bit hoarse. I could tell he was tired.

"I could ask the same thing." 

"Nothing that concerns you." He looked away.

"You're hiding something. You can tell me everything." I could tell I was annoying because he frowned. "I know I shouldn't pry but I worry about you and I don't know why. Maybe it's because you ran to me that day. What is happening to you, Malfoy?" 

He didn't say anything and just look into my eyes. His breathing was starting to get heavy, his hands were shaking. 

He was having another panic attack.

"Malfoy?" I went closer to him and placed my hand on his back.

"H-Help..." I didn't know what to do but to look for help. He needs to be in the Hospital Wing. Calming draught is the only thing that can stop his state.

"I'll find help." I was about to go when he held my wrist. "Malfoy, I need to get help. We need to go to the Hospital Wing."

"No. I-I can't. Please, stay." So, I did. I embraced him as if I can make his troubles go away. I caressed his back. I could feel his breathing was slowly going normal.

"I'm a death eater. And I'm sorry you have to be one of us." 

"H-How did you know?" My throat starts to tighten as I feel my heart wanted to break out of its cage.

"I was there... I heard your screams and your cries. The image of you haunts me. It reminds me of how much of a coward I am. I couldn't protect you. I..."

"It's time you bear the mark." Father looked at me. His eyes were emotionless just as they had always been.

The Malfoys, Nott, Crabbe, Goyle, and other pureblood couples worship He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named are in here. They were all looking at me.

"You already disappointed us by being sorted in Ravenclaw and neglecting your responsibility as a Parkinson. Not to mention your association with mudbloods."  

"I told you, Father. I am not joining you. I will not fight with Him." It's a stupid thing to talk back, I know. But what's enough is enough. They forced me enough to incline myself with dark arts.

"You don't have a choice, Y/N." Mother pointed a wand at me. Before I could utter a word, she used an unforgivable curse at me.

"Crucio."

My whole body collapsed from the unbearable pain. It feels like it was going to break me, to tear me apart.

I screamed and screamed as my mother continued to cast the same spell on me. I didn't care whether some of them were watching but I know they were entertained. 

"Why can't you be more like your sister?" Mother asked. I didn't bother to answer her.

My whole body was shaking. I was crying and my head was burning. I wanted to run away. Death was closer than I thought. 

I wonder if they would kill me now. 

I felt a weight upon my body. Though my vision was blurry, I knew it was Bellatrix Lestrange. I tried to pull away from her but she cast a spell on me as if my whole body was paralyzed. 

I continued to shout my cries and begged for help like someone was going to stop what she was doing to me.

"Please...Stop. No more... I-I beg you..." I said between my cries. It was almost hard to understand what I was saying. While my cries were filling the room we were in, Bellatrix's laugh was audible.

My parents watched me get tortured. Blood was dripping from my wrists. She continued to cut my skin, even on my face, she left a cut. She was ruining me and I couldn't do anything.

While she continues to torture me, I could feel the burning sensation on my wrists.

No... It can't be...

"PLEASE NO!" I shouted. As soon as she finished, she left. All of them left the room except my parents.

"You must make us proud. Whether you like it or not. You will join us. We sealed your fate and you must accept it." Father said before leaving the room.

I was left laying there with a dark mark on my wrist. I would rather join Death over this.

Staring at the ceiling, I was thinking about all of the possible ways to end my life. Right here, right now. But I was too weak to move or do anything at all.

My eyes were slowly closing. If I lost consciousness right now, I hope I'll never wake up again. 

Let me die in my sleep.

Please.

"None of it was your fault," I told him.

"I know... But I carried you to your bed that night. I cleaned your wounds. But I know I can't take the pain away. I wish I could. But I can't." 

"I tried to take it off, you know. I cast every spell. I even wanted to chop off my wrists. I never wanted to torture people and yet I did because what choice do I have?" I was crying and this time Malfoy pull me into his arms.

"I'm tired, Draco. But I have to be strong. I need to protect my friends. They still need me. Even if they have to hate me from joining the other side." 

"We'll protect each other." He said. I looked at him and he gave me a faint smile. "Even if they'll get us killed. As long as I'm with you."

I let myself sink into his arms. We could hear our hearts beating. It was calm. Our hearts found comfort in each other. 

"Thank you, Draco... Thank you."

"No. Thank you, love. And I'm sorry."

*****

I feel like this is a boring one. But, oh well. Thank you for the continuous support despite having had a hiatus for months.

[luminouswriter]

Some #Chenford thoughts.

↪I want all the good things for Tim & Lucy—as Chenford but also as individuals. That being said, I don't want them to rush. I want them to be the one couple that the show dives deeper into and let's unfold naturally. I don't want by the end of the season for Tim to propose and Lucy be pregnant by episode one of S6.

I want to experience them dating. The cute and fluffy stuff, the stolen glances at work, the slight barely there touches, I want to watch them freak out when the other is in danger, I want to watch them get to know each other even better on their couches and beds and laugh and open up about all the ugly stuff that they know each others hearts completely. I want them to grow into their "You know you're my best friend right?" Era. I want the angst and growing pains until they settle into their own.

I want what makes Tim —Tim and what makes Lucy—Lucy to be brought into the writing to make their relationship more complex.

For example with Tim Bradford—if you deeply get his character and see things from his perspective and not your own then you get why he is the way he is. He is the most layered character and it's all got to do with his past.

He is a grump and smug and sarcastic and I think they have all been coping mechanisms with his whole past being abused then the army that he won't talk about then the Academy and Isabel.

He won't say it—but he has abandonment issues, it's why he keeps people at a distance. I think Lucy breached that barrier pretty quickly and easily it's why Tim tried by all means to keep things "professional". It's why he didn't want her to talk too much about personal stuff and why he calls her Chen and even with we see how easily he folds when it comes to her. " Air Conditioning makes you weak." Lucy gets hurt "How about I fix that air conditioning." And this was early on when he was still a big grump.

Tim fell for Lucy first, it's easy to see and this didn't happen this season. We've established that Tim is a great guy who cares about people. We saw how he stood up for Jackson or how we've had it mentioned in passing that he's helped Nolan out but I don't think if either those two or even another female Rookie like Barnes had wanted to go into UC that Tim would have acted the way he did when Lucy got interested in UC. He probably didn't even understand why he felt like that but Lucy and UC scared him shitless. Here is this woman that he has unexplainable feelings for taking the same path his wife took and later abandoned him & their marriage for.

Tim is terrified of loosing Lucy—we've seen that play out and not just losing her as in dying or getting addicted to like drugs but if you've paid attention then you've noticed after he asked her to go to UC school and she misunderstood why he told her that and this distance was created between them then you did notice he is scared of losing her in his life as—a friend or whatever. The sneaked in glances and facial expressions showed how much he hated that they weren't close anymore.

His issues are the reason why he didn't leave Ashley when she said she didn't want to have kids or marriage (I don't even remember) he cared about her and maybe loved her to some degree but it wasn't something so profound that he was seeing forever with her 💁🏾‍♀️. The way she left him hurt him but he wasn't madly in love with her, Ashley was safe while Lucy—for Tim is danger. She collapses his walls without even doing much and that needs to be played into their relationship. That love that he didn't think he could find again—even deeper this time, that fear of losing in more ways that one and the fear that she so easily sees past his defences and he can't protect himself.

Lucy is such a complex character too. (And I love that they are doing something a little more with her this season but they need to dig deeper. We need more of her for the seasons to come.) She deserves more, especially with her family storyline wise.

I think Lucy's biggest plotline is that she needed support, one that her own family didn't give her. And to prove to herself and others that she belonged. Tim gave her that. Even with all his rough edges he pushed Lucy and gave her the net under the ledge that she deserved. But even with that—i think her insecurities kicked in when Tim asked her to go to UC, she felt rejected esp knowing that they were about to cross a line. Her need to prove herself and her not being able to see herself the way others see her can be such a great incorporation in their relationship.

Chenford has the potential to be one of the best ships because both characters are not written to be perfect (acting like a character doesn't have faults and is this perfect person who deserves to only be treated with kid gloves does a disservice to them) and are so intricate and lovable. The obstacles at work alone makes their ship more interesting and then you add their personal lives? They could be so great and we need the show to follow through.

[orginllazyblog]

AFK Arena drawings I did :D

Also, Headcannons!

First attempt drawing Annih

Honestly, the closest accurate if Lilith finally adds the two gods in the game

More drawings of him:

10% blood left -> 90% almost complete

Small headcanon: Dura and Annih create the celestial twins as they weren't first created to start off as kids to adults. As well for them handle Annih's work when he "abandon".

Next is his outfit, which is giving a Maleficent vibe. The second one is his celestial outfit:

A close-up of him. Giving him braids. You may also find that I drew little fireballs, references from his loading screen background, or from the wiki website if you don't know what I mean. Coming up with his clothing design, I have a feeling he would wear something that covers his neck to feet.

Yeah, you might think he would show more of his skin and consider he's the creator of the Hypogeans. Nah! Boy would wear a black hoodie in the middle of a hot summer.

You may also find that I drew little fireballs, references from his loading screen background, or from the wiki website if you don't know what I mean.

One is chaotic gremlin, and the other is more chill. A dark red mix magenta makes the mortals give into becoming Hypogeans, which explains for those like Lucretia and Lavatune who were once humans. The chill one is the creator of the Graveborns and thus report to Annih on their activities. The reason why Annih is not guiding the souls to the afterlife was to play his villain role until Dura's vacation is over.

But hey, that's just fan theory

Anyway, it's Dura's turn:

Young and sweet 👍🏼 while he's more mature and serious. I had fun drawing her long, wavy hair. Surprisingly, this is the only drawing I have for her while I drew her brother more.

Oh yeah! Speaking of that. I intend to make these two as siblings instead of having typical Hades x Persephone stereo type because it's just makes the Hades character more misunderstood. Looking back at @tatarella afk Arena post, it seems dev lilith's made him that way; jealous of Dura's favoritism, hated his job, and want destruction to Esperia.

Me: Alright, I'ma do it in my own way.

HC #1: Annih was not given attention from his creator, Honas, Primordial God of Order and Creation. This makes him question his eternal life crisis, thus telling Dura that he wanted to just disappear as he thinks he doesn't have much potential like her. She tells him that he's important to this world and that they were meant to be a pair of siblings who look after each other as they were made that way. Even though one is busy with their God duties, they give him a gift, which is a library filled with every Esperian mortal life recorded in a book. He never likes the humans as much as his sister and prefers a quiet environment.

HC #2: Him being a cold brother but secretly cares and worries for his sister. Back then, she was too nice, and he fears that someone could try to take her naiveness to their greedy intentions. He made sure to warn her multiple times to never be fooled by the humans. That one Hazbin Hotel reference: "You don't take shit from any demons!"

HC #3: When Dura and Annih were fighting during the war to make everyone believe their acting, he didn't want to hurt the only closet family he had besides Honas who they haven't seen him ever since from the beginning. He had a theory that if something were to happen between the siblings, Honas would come to deal with them, but somehow, they did not after that war.

HC #4: Goodbye, young Dura, now she's gone through character development. The reason why I headcanon that she stay at the Dislyte universe was that the game was also created by Lilith developers. There, she learned the fashion style, technology, trends, and some of the people, though she was only here for a vacation.

HC #5: With every mortal life recorded in the book, it also recorded the gods like Dura and Annih themselves. Though, he decided not to read his or hers because he respects privacy. One time, he found what seemed to be two large, thick books with strange cover. He then realized this was Honas and Lutos' life book still recording, but he never read it as he never wanted to remember Honas. As for Lutos, he knew they're more dangerous and that Honas was guarding the prison throughout eons. Annih never told Dura as she wonders if Honas would ever come to visit as she see them as a father figure. Yeah, I'm giving Annih Daddy issues.

HC# 6: Okay, this is the last one. Honas and Lutos, I headcanon that they are genderless, though Honas takes the form of a masculine figure, and Lutos takes the form of a feminine figure. Maybe even starting off as enemies to lovers as I have been writing about quite a lot 😅

[sunhated-a]

Okay I got more questions…. (hope I’m not annoying you in any way. I’m the same guy who asked the nihilists question.)

This is more directed to muzans canon backstory.

So a observation, since one of narcissisms root causes is also being emotionally neglected as a child, i think that muzan was never giving enough emotional attention by his parents or anyone really.

But did he ever think about his past and know that he was abused in someway? Or did he just surpass everything about his times as a human that aren’t useful? Or did he just ignore it since it was a long time ago and he thinks it doesn’t really matter at this point?.. or does he not care about it?

Hello anon, I'm glad to see you back! And please, don't worry about annoying me with questions like these, I adore them. They are a huge reason why I made this blog so feel free to come and ask anything whenever.

NOW! To answer your question. For canon Muzan? I absolutely think you're onto something there. I don't know about diagnosing him with Narcissism as a personality disorder. NPD is a very complicated and extremely misunderstood disorder that should be approached with empathy and care. However! He does display some of the traits of what we colloquially call narcissism.

I think Muzan deludes himself into thinking that perfection is his own escape from his past. The way it reminds him of weakness, but the way that he forcibly makes his demons dependent on him does indicate a need to be needed, and his demands to be worshiped by them definitely comes across as someone who deeply craves attention, love and respect. To be seen as perfect in their eyes and nothing less. The way that lack of control over a situation or one of his demons will lead him into a rage, to the point that he is exacting and utterly merciless.

It all leads me to believe that he is deeply affected by his human life.

I went back to the extended flashback scene that we were given in the anime recently. And while Muzan did live in lavish conditions (especially for the time) and was surrounded by servants, we never actually saw any of his family members. We never really saw a scene between himself and his mother or father, or his siblings, or much of a relationship between him any anyone really. So it's not too much of a reach to say that he did suffer from emotional neglect, or some sort of abandonment. Which would explain his resentful and hateful feelings towards much of the world.

Now why he seemed to face this abandonment-- if at all-- is still up in the air. Maybe his parents just weren't sure how long he'd be alive for, maybe they didn't want to get attached, maybe they sucked, maybe they're dead. It could be a lot of factors there.

I think that while canon Muzan remembers his past with stunning clarity, he engages with it with the same cold logic he does with everything else. If he has some resentment towards his family, he doesn't seem to show it. Didn't even mention them whenever he narrated his own story.

I, however, think Muzan's past affects him deeply still. He just doesn't show it. Or at the very least, in an outward way. He's far too fixated on his future to really think back on his past, and the person that he once was. Maybe he isn't even aware of how neglect and abandonment has affected him because he shows a lack of introspection throughout the series, especially when it comes to his relationships to others.

But we do see him display a deep fear of abandonment at the end of the manga, which I won't get into detail to avoid specific spoilers, but if you know you know.

But it lends credence to the idea that Muzan never had any substantial relationships.

[cosmichighpriestess]

Off with their heads.

Chosen ones, a lot of people are finding out the hard way that you are not the same person you used to be. They are fucking around and they are finding out. These pickmeishas, these attention whores if you will are using your energy, your presence, your name for their own reputations and their own benefit while smearing your name and smiling in your face. These cowards could never tell you to your face they talked badly on your name for years. Not knowing who you were, not knowing your name holds weight in high places, not knowing by cursing you they are cursing themselves.

They are talking a lot but not much of substance is coming out of their dirty mouths. When you are a person who walks in integrity, you chosen ones, and you are also very understanding, compassionate, kind, forgiving with lower vibrational people, (not being disrespectful, its better than calling them a narcissist) many of these people will take your kindness for weakness. They downplayed our strength, our intelligence, they downplayed our ability to stand up for ourselves over and over. They play the boy who cried wolf while throwing the stones at your back. Archangel Michael is laughing hysterically at them. God is saying, stand back my children and watch what I will do while they think you are all alone.

Many of us feared being seen as the villain or even being excluded from the family or group for speaking out against injustices when being disrespected, abused, neglected, not believed and downplayed but now we don't care what anyone thinks because we rather be hated for who we are than loved for who we are not. We know who we are, we know we always have pure intentions and want everyone to win because that's who we are as souls connected to the most high. That is why we don't care what anyone thinks about our reputation or our healthy boundaries and our self respect, our self love because we know we will already be misunderstood for protecting our peace. We've accepted we will be misunderstood for life. Unbothered by people living in denial and unbothered what they think because we have already been through hell, we have already died a million times, gone through the dark night of the soul for years and been reborn so we're not going through disrespect again for someone who doesn't know any better it's like watching toddlers try to play with the big boys. In my case, I'm a high priestess with authority to cast out demons.

We burn bridges because we know we can swim. We see through the illusionary game the first time around and we don't stick around to find out that you're a person who lacks integrity and that is sent to hold us back. They are mad that we see through their game before they can even play it. We were always powerful but we didn't want to abuse our own power, some of course were blinded to our own power for decades and we thought we had none until we went on their own self discovery journey. Our journey into the unknown was our journey into self. People saw our power before we did. They didn't want us to see our own power and light so they constantly put us down relying on our kindness and forgiveness to get away with their disrespect and abuse for years and decades. Now we're becoming free and being set free while receiving our good karma but we can still observe the lower dimensions of people living in anxiety, fear, chaos and their own hell they created by hurting innocent children and people.

These people would come into our lives and drain our energy. These energetic vampires were feasting on our pure energy and light because they lost their own light. People saw us as naive and sweet until they met the multiple different aspects of us by using their insults disguised as jokes. Many people saw me as a therapist in their own life to dump all of their problems onto. People would literally say to me. ," that was a great therapy session let's do this again next time. " leaving me completely drained. Leaving me feeling used. Never holding space for me to talk about my own life and traumas then gaslighting me to make me doubt my own intuition when I told the truth about their family member or friend.

So I isolated myself for years and then I was called stuck up, selfish, two faced, manipulative, evil etc. for taking my energy and time back. I barely had any energy to begin, as being a single autistic mom is already draining enough. I had so much compassion and so much love to give that it was easy for them to take advantage of my kind nature. Can you imagine attacking a single mom all because she triggered your insecurities by existing and smiling? My happiness was triggering for miserable people so I hid my smile for years. They had to steal my joy anytime I was caught smiling or feeling good. But they didn't know that I had another side to me that I never wanted to unleash on any soul. Now, because so many people have mistaken my kindness for weakness, I have unleashed the lion within me. People are finding out the hard way not to disrespect me, oppress me or mistreat me and I'm sure chosen ones you are going through a similar situation. Our intuition is always screaming at us who is for us and against us.

Every single person I encounter is testing my boundaries, testing the waters to see what they can get away with and they are getting away with nothing. I am calling out abuse left and right. I am calling out years of mistreatment, disrespect, belittlement, manipulation, weaponized incompetence, gaslighting, control, smear campaigns, and neglect every single time. These arrogant people feel entitled to our time and energy as if they even deserved it in the first place. They perceive us as being alone and think they can get away with anything because physically, yes we are alone. Spiritually however we are far from alone. Archangel Michael loves and stands up for his Chosen ones. His behavior mimics almost similar to demonic activity.

He watches and waits to see what these lower vibrational people will do when presented with a loving, innocent looking, healing person in front of them. He lets them fuck around with us until it goes too far. Archangel Michael does not play about his Earth Angels and chosen ones. His behavior shows when there is an evil injustice done to innocents. These foolish elementary level humans actually believe that they are entitled to our presence and that we owe them our presence, our time,our money, our abundance, our energy, our healing, our labor and our wisdom while giving us nothing but trauma in return. They think that they can talk to us any way that they want, treat us however they want, waste our valuable time, energy and use us for free. They exploited us and inserted misery into our lives as payment for all the unconditional love and healing we gave them along with our abundance and luck we earned. They manipulated us into giving them what they wanted.

As if our energy and time are not valuable, as if we are not worthy of respect and boundaries. It is a shame that they have to find out the hard way that we were never alone. We only appeared to be alone. We are used as bait for people that have bad intentions for Earth Angels to receive their karma. Now they will face the same situations they wished upon us, which for some they wished death upon us. They should have found something more safe to play with. Come out, come out wherever you are God says. My chosen ones will be vindicated and you will receive everything that you are due. May everyone receive what they deserve.

[ravensvirginity]

okay, so as a goth person, i personally feel as though raven being goth isn't the problem — it's raven being "goth" and written by men with "big tiddy goth gf" fetishes.

being goth is first and foremost about an appreciation of all things dark and different in the world; this typically includes not fearing death because there's a beauty in passing on, as well as just appreciating stereotypically scary and unconventional things. sure, music and fashion are also very important in goth subculture, but the appreciation of darkness is what actually makes someone goth.

i feel like this suits raven a lot. she's always been very misunderstood by her peers and viewed as something dark and evil, but she does nothing but choose to be good and fight for justice. she loves the dark and strange because that's what she is herself. and then you could make some arguments that maybe she enjoys some goth music as a lot of it can be used for meditation, or that she likes goth fashion because of how she dresses (i don't know a single goth person who didn't wear a cloak as a kid plus have you seen her shoes? every goth fems dream) even if she doesn't just wear plain all black.

so, in a sense, i think a character like ntt raven being goth is perfectly fine because you don't have to make her wear boring all black cloths or make her skin gray in an excuse to whitewash her — she can still be a normal person whose allowed to participate in her indian heritage and use practices from hinduism, she's just goth. it's only weird when people then give her the ugliest dyed hair imaginable and make her into a mean-spirited person who hates all things cute and positive and colorful (i mean cmon her gf is starfire ffs)

yeah, i definitely see where you're coming from! it's very clear also that any time she skews goth in any media it's not someone who like, actually knows anything about the goth subculture, they're just either trying to pander to a demographic or they're into the hot goth gf stereotype (or both). I personally hate Raven with short dyed hair, I love her with long black hair and like that's not even not goth, black hair is actually very goth. they just make her the ugliest bargain bin version of goth bc no one does any research into actual goth subcultures and call it a day.

[ashland-frost]

Slytherin & his Ravenclaw

Just a simple fan fiction, read if you like and give me some feedback, I'm been working on my writing.

My OC is Ashland Frost from a necromancer family and is good friends with Sebastian Sallow.

Had a dream about this so I just wrote it out.

Frost strolls through the courtyard and notices Anne, Sebastian, and Ominis huddled together. However, Sebastian appears visibly sad and exhausted. As Frost approaches, she realizes that Anne and Ominis are glaring at her and Sebastian, clearly displeased. Despite knowing that they don't particularly like her, Frost and Sebastian share a strong bond. With a mischievous grin, she greets the two before shifting her attention to the weary Sebastian, who sits in the middle looking utterly defeated.

Anne and Ominis hastily rise from their seats and shoot Frost a disdainful glance. Unfazed by their animosity, Frost, who hails from a family of necromancers, takes a seat beside Sebastian. He turns to her and apologizes, explaining that Anne and Ominis believe she is the reason he has been delving into the dark arts and have been lecturing him for hours. Exhausted, he sighs and rests his head on her shoulder.

" I'm used to being misunderstood, but you seem really down. Is something else bothering you?" she asks, gently stroking his head and running her fingers through his messy brown hair. He lets out a sigh and buries himself further into her neck for comfort. "My uncle keeps getting on my case, and I feel like nobody understands me," he explains. "Ominis is my best friend, but he's closer to my sister, and they always seem to be on the same page. Meanwhile, I'm always the one at fault... Am I really that difficult to understand? Even my own family and closest friend don't seem to get me." He looks on the verge of tears, which surprises her, as he usually hides his emotions well.

"Sebastian, you have me. I understand you. It's okay if just one person in this world does. That's the best we can hope for," she says, leaning her head closer to his. "Please don't cry. I hate seeing you so sad, especially when I've never seen you look so defeated.”

Frost always maintains a composed demeanor, but with Sebastian, it has become a challenge. Witnessing him in such pain tugs at her heartstrings. As a tear escapes his eyes, she swiftly brushes it away. The sun begins to set, casting a gentle glow upon them. Few students linger around as they find solace in each other's embrace on the bench. Although they are merely friends, outsiders often mistake them for a couple. In reality, they have never labeled their relationship, content with the closeness they share. As the sun dips below the horizon, enveloping them in shadows, the lights gradually illuminate, creating a serene atmosphere as they sit in comfortable silence.

“It breaks my heart to see myself in such a pitiful state, especially in front of you " he murmurs softly, his voice filled with a few sniffles.

She finds it endearing, unable to resist his vulnerability. "You don't have to apologize for feeling this way. I'll always be here to provide comfort," she reassures him, gently playing with his hair. Although her words bring him some solace, the fear of her leaving and not being by his side forever still haunts him.

His voice drops even lower, almost a whisper, as he asks himself more than her, "Will you truly be here?" A smile graces her lips as she hears the desperation in his voice. "I promise," she whispers, planting a tender kiss on the top of his head, feeling the tickle of his soft, fluffy hair against her nose. "You seem exhausted. Why don't you have dinner and go to bed early?”

"Would you like to join me?" He asks gently. Aware of her preference to avoid crowded places while eating, Frost responds with a hum, "Sure, hopefully your sister and Ominis won't make a fuss about it."

Excited by her agreement, he says, "Come on, let's go before the entire school fills the Great Hall." They make their way to the Ravenclaw table and start eating, attracting the attention of a few students who rarely see Frost during dinner. She usually keeps to herself, and her unique appearance as an albino makes her stand out. There is an undeniable beauty about her that captivates Sebastian's gaze, as well as the curiosity of other students.

"I'm sorry... I know you don't like being stared at," he apologizes. She smiles and reassures him, "It's alright, love. It's just dinner. I'm used to having eyes on me wherever I go. Looking like a ghost isn't exactly ordinary."

Sebastian grins and playfully remarks, "A Snow Fairy attending school is definitely intriguing." Her pale cheeks blush a rosy pink as she responds, "Please don't call me that in public. It feels embarrassing."

With a wide grin on his face, he savors every bite of his food. Just then, Anne and Ominis enter the room and take a seat at the Slytherin table, their eyes fixed on Sebastian and Frost. Frost slowly turns her head, sensing their intense gaze. Despite Ominis being blind, his presence is unmistakable when he desires it. She playfully winks at them, flashing a smile. Meanwhile, Sebastian remains oblivious, focused on finishing his meal.

She doesn't want him to become sad again, Frost decides to divert his attention by gently poking his cheek. "You look like a chipmunk stuffing his face, so cute," she teases, causing his face to turn red as he chews his food, avoiding eye contact by staring down at his plate. They continue to banter and enjoy their meal together. Once they finish, Frost suggests taking a leisurely walk, and Sebastian eagerly agrees. Leaving the hall behind, they wander aimlessly, enjoying each other's company.

"Huh, can't believe it's already this late. Should I walk you back to your dorm?" Frost suggests.

a mischievous smirk playing on Sebastian's lips. "Although, I must admit, it feels like the roles should be reversed here. But just for tonight, I'll allow it."

They make their way towards the Slytherin dorms, Frost reminding him, "Make sure to get some sleep, you look like the dead."

"I've been having trouble sleeping lately," he confesses, scratching his head.

Frost rummages through her pockets and pulls out a small bottle. "Here, take this. It'll help you sleep. Those bags under your eyes look dangerous."

He accepts the bottle, but his hands linger on hers. "You care about me so much. I know you were trying to distract me from looking at Anne and Ominis at dinner... thank you," he says, his hand slipping away.

Blushing slightly, she playfully pokes his chest. "How could I not care about you, you silly boy?" A warm smile spreads across her face as she gazes up at him. "Bend down a little, I don't like how tall you're getting!" she pouts, and he obediently lowers himself to her level. She grabs his collar, catching him off guard, and surprises him with a kiss. His eyes close, overwhelmed by the unexpected affection. Afraid to hold her too tightly, he keeps his hands to himself as they share a sweet and tender moment. When they finally part, both are left flustered beyond words. She turns away slightly, her voice soft and affectionate. "Goodnight, my sunflower." He's completely taken aback, As he stuttered out the words "goodnight, my... snow fairy," he vanished through the Slytherin door.

Frost couldn't help but giggle, her wide grin quickly fading when she noticed Anne's intense gaze. "Are you two dating?" Anne asked, her eyes filled with surprise. Despite their closeness, Frost and Sebastian had never seemed intimate with each other.

"We're not dating... yet. But I would love to be with him. I truly care for your brother," Frost replied. Anne's shock was evident as she stammered, "You... do you love him?"

Frost nods half-expecting Anne to be angry, but instead, she let out a sigh. "I don't know why I'm surprised. You two have always had this unique connection. I guess I'm just worried that you're leading him astray, teaching him things he shouldn't learn."

"I do teach Sebastian whatever he wants to know, but he's intelligent and responsible, Anne. He won't get into trouble. However, if you keep treating him like a troublemaker and making him feel guilty all the time, it might create problems in the future," Frost explained, looking down before meeting Anne's eyes again. "Do you despise me so much because of who I am? And what my family does?" she asked, her voice filled with vulnerability.

Anne's frustration was evident in her expression as she replied, "No, I don't hate you. I'm just overly concerned about my brother's well-being, and I guess I let that cloud my judgment. I'm sorry. I can see that you genuinely care for him.”

Frost nodded, her eyes softening with understanding. "I understand your worry, Anne. Sebastian means the world to me, and I would never do anything to harm him or get him im trouble, If anything, I want to support him and help him in everything."

Anne sighed again, her shoulders slumping slightly. "I know you mean well, Frost. It's just hard for me to accept all this, especially with his interest in the dark arts, but he can make his own choices. I've always been the one looking out for him. Our uncle is, well, you know, but I need to trust him more."

"I have absolute faith in him, Anne," Frost said gently. "I want to explore, to learn, and to be with him, I hope you understand"

Anne's eyes filled with a mixture of emotions – love, worry, and a hint of resignation. "I suppose I need to step back and let him be, Ominis and I have been nagging him too much, I didn't even realize he was so exhausted. Just promise me, Frost, that you'll always be there for him. Promise me that you'll protect him when he needs it."

Frost reached out to hold Anne's hands. "I promise, Anne. I will never leave his side. He means everything to me"

A hint of a smile tugged at the corners of Anne's lips, her worry beginning to fade. "Thank you, Frost. I appreciate your honesty and your love for my brother. I just want the best for him."

Frost squeezed Anne's hands gently, the bond between them strengthening. "I know you do, Anne. And I promise, I will always strive for Sebastian's happiness, because its my own too"

Anne couldn't help but burst into laughter. She never expected Frost to be so cheesy, especially when it came to expressing her feelings for her brother. It made her wonder if her own brother was just as corny when it came to her.

Frost joined in the laughter, admitting, "Yeah, yeah, I know. he definitely makes me question the things I say sometimes." She couldn't help but feel a tad embarrassed by her words and relieved to have gained Anne's acceptance, knowing it would mean a lot to Sebastian.

As Frost bid her farewell and made her way back to the Ravenclaw dormitory, her ethereal white hair disappeared up the winding stairs.

"She looks like a magical creature," Anne remarked, her eyes filled with admiration. "My brother certainly has a knack for choosing extraordinary girls."

Emerging from the corner, Ominis joined the conversation. "So it would seem, and I see your conversation went smoothly."

"After knowing you for five years, it still gives me chills when you appear out of nowhere. Couldn't you at least make some noise?" she teased, rolling her eyes playfully.

"Where's the fun in that?" he replied with a mischievous smile. "But I suppose we should let Sebastian pursue his hobbies undisturbed."

Anne putting Ominis into the Slytherin common room.

"I believe that's the wisest course of action," she agreed, taking Ominis' hand, causing a faint blush to colour his cheeks.

"What are you doing?" he stammered, caught off guard.

"Simply escorting my dearest friend to his room," she replied with a warm smile.

"Don't you dare start!" he exclaimed, his flustered expression turning into a playful one.

[misty-doodles]

A (small) analysis of Niragi

Now, it's like 9pm and my brain is mush, I'm going off memory with this quote said in season 2, episode 7. It's said by none other than eternally angry boy, Niragi Suguru, a menace to the aib fandom space. Now, I do enjoy him as a character, and I also hate him as a person, and to watch both sides of the fandom bicker is tiring. I like him, I think he's complex and fun, and very fucked up. I think he has some interesting things to explore, like what I want to talk about that I feel gets misunderstood a lot. I am not a Niragi apologist who thinks his actions are fine or that he's a uwu baby, and I can fully see him a morally corrupt person. He's still fun to me. With that out of the way, a little analysis on one specific quote.

~~~

"if there were 7 billion of me, you'd be the villain too,"

Now, a lot of the reaction YouTubers I've seen usually scoff at him, or don't understand him at all when he says this, because wtf does that even mean? Dude just tried to kill the main cast. But listen.

Niragi is a deeply troubled person with an extensive history of emotional neglect and physical abuse. He's a hurt, abused adult who's never been given an ounce of positive reinforcement in his life before he got to beach and then, that was the fuel to his psycho.

In his attempt to never show weakness for fear of being hurt again, he's become the very people he hates. He's become his bullies, repeating the cycle of abuse. And he knows that, it's why he's so angry when he sees Arisu and Chishiya become better people. Because they also lacked loving families, and made selfish choices that hurt those around them, and to Niragi, they should be able to understand his pain. But they were able to break the cycle and be happy, and Niragi wasn't. And it's because of this he's become the one thing he truly hates the most.

Alone.

He doesn't want or deserve their forgiveness. He knows that. He wants someone, for once, to just understand why hes like this.

If there were 7 billion of me, you'd be the villain too.

If everyone you knew belittled and hurt you, made you suffer till all you could feel was bone deep resentment, you'd become just as bad as them.