#for my personal online and offline safety

[jsketch12]

i keep getting asks about my pronouns. unfortunately posting the answer would literally endanger me in real life, which is probably an indicator of what the answer is

[findlesbians]

want to find lesbians?

since the announcement of the sunsetting of @lezgetpersonal, my girlfriend and i (@lambtrickster) have decided to carry the torch.

the rules remain the same as they were on that blog. this is an 18+ only blog for same-sex attracted (lesbian or bisexual) females (anyone observed female at birth, regardless of gender identity.) you may post ads in search of romance, friendship, penpals, sex partners, something online, something offline, fellow feminists, witches, any combination or all of the above.

you may send in as much or as little as you feel comfortable with, with a few caveats:

do not be overly sexual in the inbox. if you are looking for an intimate partner, be brief in what you're looking for (femme, butch, chubby/fat, stone, etc.) we don't want to know if you're a virgin or what fetishes you have.

do not post overly identifying information. be mindful of what personal information you're giving out. sharing your general state, state area, or what country you're from is fine, but please practice basic internet safety here

please include a method of contact (discord, email, telegram, etc.), how you plan to reach out ("leave a like and i'll get back to you"), and state clearly what you're looking for!

this blog will be open forever. if ever the mods need to take a step back, we will be passing the mantle on.

and for anyone else reading this, please do feel inspired to make your own blogs like this. we need to diversify our methods of reaching out to other lesbians and feminists now more than ever!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for snapping and scaring a kid?

Okay first, some background, I (F20) am a sorta bnf in a fandom I write and draw for and I am a group of roughly 10 other kinda bnfs who do the same and are all 20+.

We all reblog from each other and support each other, and one unique thing we also do is block minors who are open about being minors that we see anywhere and/or that interact with us.

We DM each other their usernames to weed them out of circle even though all of accounts are PG and do not have and dnis or warnings that minors will be blocked. We don't let anyone know we do this, make no posts about it, no warnings, they just get blocked without any exchange.

There's a few reasons why we do this:

to encourage kids to not let their age be publicly know.

to make sure kids are not getting normalized to interacting with strange adults online

kids, to put it kindly, are fucking lame once you become a certain age through no fault of their own. There's nothing in common after a while. They don't understand adult life and can't relate in the same way another adult can, and this is just no good reason for an unrelated strange adult online to let a kid interact with them that's sketchy and weird as shit

I grew up lurking and with strict internet safety lessons. Nowadays, kids seem to not know how to lurk and basic internet safety anymore. I've tried to make post upon post warning them of the dangers of putting personal information, especially their age, online, but it's done nothing to make the minors interacting to act more safely.

But me and my friend group have found that the only way to get kids to lurk and not put their age online like they should is if they get loose access the things they want because of their age is public.

So many of the kids who follow me have been blocked and they realized why they're getting blocked and came back on a much safer lurker account. I know I'm not the asshole for doing this and encouraging others to do this because ultimately it keeps the kid safer.

What I do think I may be the asshole is when one kid in particular, I'll call him X, spent months testing me to figure out and confirm that I was blocking minors who are open about their age and then spent weeks after that threatening to call me out and accused me of being agist, a pedophile because why am I so scared to interact with kids, and lying about being cis-queer because queers wouldn't discriminate like this.

At first he was was just the usual kiddo with his age in his bio, so I blocked him, and while I didn't notice it at first, he kept making more accounts with his age in the bio and following me. I caught on when I was curious about why do many 14 years olds were following me in a row because normally is varied from around 10 to 17, and I noticed similarities across the account and realized it was one kid desperately trying to following me.

I figured I just keep blocking until he figured out how to keep his age offline, and it seemed to work when I got followed by an identical account with the age missing from any posts and the bio. I let him keep following, not interacting because he's 14 and that'd be fucking weird, but then a week into following me on this new ageless account I got a DM.

It was full of screenshots of me blocking him on he openly a minor accounts and then him just accusing of what I said above. I blocked, not caring to respond to a 14 year old, but he keep making burners to DM more and more accusation.

I just kept blocking without responding, not wanting to waste my time, but then he treatened to call me out for being all those things. I've seen first hand how life ruining those accusation and false callouts can be, how people see those accusations and do no research and let their instinctual disgust and fear of those people drive the accused to going offline or even committing suicide.

I did not want this, and the fact that this may become a possibility due to a kid who just couldn't accept not everyone wants known minors following them, made me super pissed off.

And so to "scare him straight" and to prevent him from making this callout post, I photoshopped screenshots of both a police and cyperbulling report being submitted and police thanking me for reporting this and how they'll check it out.

At the time, still being super angry, it was very satisfying to see him come apologizing, saying he'll stop stalking me, and asking for me to tell the police and cyberbulling that it was a fake report and that it's been handled.

I didn't bother responding and just blocked him, and this time, he didn't make another burner. In fact, he deleted all his accounts.

A few months have past, and now that my anger has melted into annoyance, and that annoyance into realization I may have went too far.

X, while annoying, and could have really hurt me with a fake callout, is at the end of the day, 14, still a little kid.

X probably just didn't know better and I could have just tried to talk to him and reason rather then scaring him. I feel especially bad because if he was a POC and/or an abuse victim still living with his abusers he may have and possibility still be fearing for his life. Also it made me look like a bootlicker and I would kill myself before I ever support a cop

So I'm wondering now if I may have been the asshole here for snapping and scaring a kid

What are these acronyms?

[cozzzynook]

The Lost Light responds to Rodimus emotions. If Rodimus is ever missing the ship can always find him. If Rodimus doesn't want to see someone the ship will block them.

It starts off with Rodimus not wanting to see anyone.

Its when he wants to be alone because he’s overwhelmed and his spark is aching.

The ship leads First aid to him but no one else.

Neither of them even knew the ship had a series of corridors like this, they weren’t in the ships schematics and so Rodimus saved that for later knowledge but when he came back to search for it it was gone.

The next time he wants to be alone is to speak with his carrier Perceptor and show him the image of his grand sparkling. Little bucket helm with red optics and kicking pedes that are aimless. Small spoiler bouncing against their sires servo that holds them. Rodimus hated when his conjunx did that but he couldn’t deny it was cute as much as it worried him. He mentioned in that moment wanting a safer way to bring him to his sparkling so they could see each other in person again and before they knew it the hidden door to his sparklings room was revealed.

It was then he figured the ship was alive, sentient in a way. He vaguely mentioned to Drift if he thought the ship to be sentient. When Drift said it wasn’t possible Rodimus nodded along but waited until he was alone in his sparklings room with his conjunx to say, “thank you.”

His conjunx raised an optic ridge but when the rook got warmer before cooling down again his conjunx didn’t look so confused. In fact he looked shocked. He felt a little smug but then he had a moment of seriousness.

“Whatever happens, even if you have to let me die, protect my sparkling. Get them to safety. Please. You can do whatever else you want. Just keep them safe and alive.”

For a long time after that the ship didn’t show any signs of life to Rodimus, Megatron or let its subtle presence be felt throughout the ship. It no longer created mildly elaborate passages that once made the crew believe it was ever changing.

Rodimus didn’t want to hurt the ship with his request but he did mean it.

His sparkling was the most important to him along with his conjunx and carrier. But they could defend themselves, his sparkling couldn’t.

He waited to be alone with his sparkling, bouncing them as they fell asleep drinking from his nozzle. To look up and apologize.

“I’m sorry I hurt you, but I do mean it. My sparkling..my bitty, I can’t..I couldn’t live if they didn’t. I don’t mean to hurt you but I need them to be okay.,” he muttered the last part, digit brushing along his sparklings forehelm, “ i hope you understand.”

He felt guilt but he still felt conviction.

He wasn’t changing his decision but he didn’t want to hurt another bots feelings.

The ship was warm not long after and everything seemed to go back to normal.

Everything was fine until they set foot on what they believed to be a deserted planet.

Rodimus was nervous the moment they landed which made him suspicious and decide to exceed with caution. The crew noticed and Rodimus kept the exploration crew small with himself, Drift, Magnus and Brainstorm.

His conjunx wanted to be the one to go but he told him it was fine. His conjunx was a gentlemech at spark even when Rodimus hated it. His spark went on the last dangerous mission they didn’t need to go on this one too.

His small team began a basic cover and search of an area when he felt something was wrong half way through.

He alerted his crew to be on guard and that something felt off.

He remembers transforming and looking around seeing nothing and feeling more unease. He commed his team saying they would head back. He was mid transformation when he felt electricity shock him into recharge.

He onlined in a damp, dark cave covered in a sticky substance that kept him trapped. He felt disgust all over before the panic set in and he was fighting to get out of the gross prison.

It was until he heard a heavy clank did he stop moving and pretended to be offline only to have his helm yanked up meeting crazed optics.

He didn’t know who the bot was but he hated the way he looked at him.

He tried comming the others and when that didn’t work he sent a spark signal to his conjunx who immediately responded.

He felt dread filling his energon lines when the mech inhaled his scent at his neck cables moving down to sniff at his chassis before settling dilated optics on his tanks.

He shook as hard as he could in the confines but it wasn’t enough to break free.

He could do no more than move his helm slightly away from the mech that tried to nuzzle into his scent releasers.

He took a deep vent, thinking of his sparkling, he used them as a grounding tool. Igniting his fingers just right until they were hot enough to burn the gooey substance. He slowly began setting his frame to the same heightened temperature as fingers, processor trying to reach his team but still getting no luck—most likely the cave and substance trapping him or the mech in front of him— he felt his outlier singing to him and he waited until the mech was sniffing his neck cables again.

The moment the mech buried his olfactory sensor in and set his servos on the sides of his chassis he burst into flames greater than necessary.

The goo melted to nothing and the mech caught fire, screaming as he held onto his melting optics while Rodimus made a dash for the exit.

He transformed speeding as far away as he could only to come to a harsh stop when he sped up a ramp and skidded to a stop in his own ship.

He transformed into root mode venting heavy where Ratchet immediately began working on him and performing scans.

A few hours later, after removing the goo and assuring Drift and the crew he was fine right after, he darted off towards the corridor that led to his actual hab that was connected to his sparklings room.

His conjunx was holding their sparkling out for him to hold and he held his bitty close in his arms as his conjunx lifted him into a strong tight embrace that made him wiggle a little to vent better.

He inhaled the scent of his sparkling that was cooing at him and patting his face plates completely oblivious much to his happiness.

He heard his hab door open and smiled knowing it was his carrier.

Perceptor gripped him in a tight hug and explained how the ship locked onto his signature a nano click after his conjunx was able to.

“Thank you,” he sobbed, finally reveling in the danger he was in and what the mech may have wanted from him.

“Thank you.”

He stayed in his hab with his conjunx, sparkling and carrier.

He didn’t want to see anyone else right now and he didn’t want anyone seeing him crying or the existence of his sparkling or to know who his conjunx was. Mechs and femmes aboard had an idea that Perceptor was his carrier but neither confirmed it. Only Brainstorm knew and the mech refused to share such information always ready to respect Perceptors wishes.

“Scent me again?”

He was met with large servos rubbing at the sides of his exposed waist, dipping digits into chub that was so hard to get rid of.

“Beautiful,” his conjunx whispered into the flesh of his belly kissing it.

“I said scent me, Megs, not get me sparked again.”

His frown was half serious and half playful. The larger mech on top of him smirked and nipped at his belly making it jiggle. He felt insecure about it, still not used to his post sparkling frame but his mech loved it.

“And if I were to do both?”

“You’d be crazy,” Rodimus laughed, carefully shifting their sparkling so they could fuel easier.

Megatron lifted himself to place a kiss on their son’s helm and gazed at him fondly.

“Would it be so bad to have another?”

He understood the weight behind his question and he wanted to say no, it wouldn’t. He wanted to agree and give this mech and himself another but he knew it was too risky.

“Not until we find the knights and go home,” Rodimus smoothed his servo against his conjunx helm. “Then we can have another sparkling,” he smiled.

“But I’m losing the weight first,” Rodimus poked him.

“Thats up for debate.”

“Its my frame!”

“Our frame, darling. Conjunx ritus,” Megatron smirked holding up the helm jewelry Rodimus only wore in their hab. It was the physical symbol of their union that many mechs and femmes would wear to show them claimed in certain cultures. Nyonians would wear helm dress and miners would wear the shedded frame pieces of their mates as neck wear.

Currently Megatrom was wearing his and now Rodimus was wearing his helm dress as well.

“I can’t wait to go home so we can fashion silks for him,” Rodimus smiled tickling their sparklings belly.

Fuzzy red optics looked to them with a smile and Megatron couldn’t resist lightly nipping chubby protoform thighs.

“And neither can I,” the proud sire chuckled.

The room grew warm again and Rodimus looked up at the ships ceiling and smiled, “thank you for finding me. I hope you get whatever it is you desire,” Rodimus smiled.

The entire crew felt a warmth buzz within them and around them, it boosted not only morale but every bots mood for the evening and later as it reached the dead shift, Rodimus saw holo glow of a ship mech standing beside the mountains of Crystal city. He recognized that place.

It was a spot where ship and large mechs and femmes built to house cybertronians on missions or to live in would meet to rejoin their families.

He committed the sight to file and smiled up at the ship while holding his sleeping bitty.

“I’ll take you there when we finish,” he promised, feeling a ghost of a hand rub his helm affectionately, “I promise.”

[lunainthemoona]

fite-clube just fucking. Backtracked his apology and said that he still thinks you might be transmasc with recently updated documents. What a piece of shit.

1. that’s really funny because you can’t update your drivers license where i live i’m pretty sure

2. okay. i’ve been wanting to talk about this for a while but this specific situation is so tricky for me because by doing this he’s directly talking about my agab, which i’ve stated multiple times that i don’t release for safety reasons. this being said, i am neither confirming nor denying my agab. but for him to publicly state that he has my documents and he thinks im faking and am actually transmasc, even though he “won’t go into detail,” he is obviously implying that im legally amab (even if he doesn’t personally believe it) without even talking about the exorcism here, like i’ve said, i don’t release my agab for safety reasons. fite-club has NO ISSUE with putting transfems he disagrees with in danger. this is what ive been wanting to talk about, THIS is why i talk about him so much and continue to interact with him. he is such a well known name and people need to realize that these conversations DO come with a cost. i wanted that apology, i also knew this would happen, and it’s important that i say this- fite-club himself is not dangerous. im trying not to call other trans people dangerous, because that in itself is just such a whistle and does exactly the same thing that’s happening to me. i dont believe he should be bullied off this platform, either. i believe that HOW he endangers people, specifically trans people, should be brought up and acknowledged so we can block him and realize the signs of what a transphobe looks like, how the arguments that people like him (transandrophobes, transmisogynsits, etc etc) take part in can cause danger to other trans people, and the signs to look out for. however, i also talk about it a lot because you know what? it’s nice to have proof. i get SO many people telling me that i don’t experience transandrophobia, don’t experience exorcism, don’t experience transmisogyny. regardless of your feelings or opinions on any of those words, i experience so many different intersections of transphobia in my day to day online AND offline life and you know what?? i’m glad i have proof of it, and i will continue to talk about it for as long as i live. i’m fucking tired of letting people erase the issues that i experience. i most certainly won’t let this guy do it.

anyways, thanks for letting me know anon. sorry this was so long, i actually meant to make this post tonight anyways but i thought this anon was a fine place to put it.

[the-bone-sys]

i wish there was more in person plural community. like, i'm able to find a queer community at school (my main in person community space), because we're able to speak about it and find each other. there's a club dedicated to us, the concept of queerness is well known and mainstream enough that there is at least sometimes space for us. people put pronouns in their bios and emails, we can mention having a same-gender partner or changing our name. even if nothing is done about it, it's acknowledged that discrimination against queer people exists and is against the rules. we can talk about it safely (all of that is in my own experience in a fairly progressive area. queerness and plurality are obviously very different and have very different histories regarding discrimination. i'm comparing them because they are both parts of our identity that can be similarly isolating and difficult to talk about).

in contrast, plurality is almost entirely isolating. sure, there's discord servers and other online communities, but there is just no safety in person. it's incredibly difficult to find other plural people, especially nearby or in the same spaces as us (such as school). even though statistically, there should be at least two, more likely several or more of us in our (large) school, it often feels like we are the only system in a 100 mile radius. it's difficult to explain to singlets and in our experience, leads to them ignoring it (not calling us by our names, etc), being really weird about it ("omg can i date x fictive i love that character") or just trying to prove us wrong. unfortunately, this inability to be open about plurality or talk about it at all leads to us not being able to find each other in person, making us feel lonely or even like it would be ridiculous to want anyone to acknowledge or accommodate us, because we feel like we are the only system there anyways.

in my mind, at least, the only remedy for this is more visibility and awareness about the plural community, especially offline. for us, this just means having a plural (&) pin on our pencil case, having our spotify public on our discord profile while we're listening to our plural feels playlist, or using we/us for ourselves instead of me/i. maybe it means making a social media post about a funny thing a plural friend said (w/ permission ofc) or mentioning a plural youtuber as one of your favorite youtubers. maybe it even means letting your friends know that you're plural or introducing yourselves with your own names if you're in a club or smth that does intros every meeting. my point is, having visibility doesn't have to be fully "coming out" if you can't/don't want to do that. a pin that only other plurals would understand or using some plural language is fine too (of course, you don't have to be open in any way about your plurality at all). the point is that showing in some way, no matter how subtly, your plurality might help other plurals to see you and realize that they are not alone. it might cause a singlet to look into plurality and be more accepting and safe. it might start to open a door for in person community. or it might not. but regardless of whether the plurals that see you and realize that there are plural people in that space talk to you about it or do anything with this information, at least someone feels more safe, and less alone. -Zephyr, they/them

[r0seart]

Hey I’m deciding to make my own post on KOSA (2024). Is it just me or is the thought of some random company having your ID make you feel very uncomfortable. Like you can just flash your ID to the bartender or cashier, but these companies will have your ID on record. We’ll be completely fucked if there’s a data leak.

Also I don’t think these people know how teens work. Teens have waltzed around with fake IDs before it’s not like this law will stop people from getting creative. As a person who wants to keep my online life and offline life completely separate I have a lot of negative feelings about a company having pictures of my ID in their database.

This could be way more dangerous that these law makers think. I’m assuming most of them don’t even have to worry about getting their identity stolen or shit like that.

This whole law is sketchy as shit and don’t get me started on what this’ll do for queer content creators and fanfic writers. I’m all for safety on the internet but this ain’t the way to do it.

[biwrites]

Picking A Side (of the Closet Door)

I’m bisexual. (wow…who knew)

Those words have never been spoken by me to most of the people in my life. I am currently in the difficult situation of being half-in half-out of the closet. To trusted friends and coworkers, I am out and proudly identifying as bi. I wear a pride pin at work, I talk openly about my sexuality on my social medias.

On the other hand, to my family, and those who might jeopardize my safety, I’m still in the closet. I’ve gotten very good at swiftly removing my pin one-handed if I see a family member, or someone I just don’t want to know, enter my workplace. I don’t talk about my sexuality on social media accounts tied to my real name or personal life. It was a big step for me when I wrote openly about my experiences as a queer person during my time at college, and terrifying when I got onstage and read some of my pieces. That night, I told my family I didn’t want them to come, that they wouldn’t like the event anyways (they wouldn't have), and that I might not even read. My family had always supported my writing in the past, and encouraged me to take it seriously, even though I wasn’t pursuing it as my main career path. In another life, it would have meant the world to have them there too, like they had been many times before, but that wasn’t the life I was living, so I took the stage alone. 

This tension between the safety of the closet and the freedom of being out has appeared before in my life, but never more sharply than now. I currently cannot safely come out for many reasons, but to remain fully closeted might kill me. The more I peek out of the closet door, the more I am visible…and that’s terrifying. I’m fully aware that I am taking risks, that someday the Good Straight Girl front I’ve worn for the last 22 years will fall, and that I may not be able to choose when it does (though I sorely hope I do). I care deeply about queer activism and community but have often felt like a traitor to the cause. How can I advocate being loud and proud when I am neither of those things myself? How can I access community when I have to watch over my shoulder to be sure nobody’s caught me in a picture at a local queer event? This internal conflict is compounded even more now that I have a partner who is out. For a bit, (even though I absolutely am not) I even felt like a worse partner for it.

So, why am I writing this? 

This Bi Visibility Month, I want to extend a hand to my fellow closeted bi and pansexuals. I want to let you know that you’re not alone, and that you are no less queer for keeping yourself safe. It’s already difficult to feel visible as a bi+ person, and it can be extremely discouraging when you have the extra layer of the closet on top of that. We have made many advancements as a community over the last few decades, and it is incredible that as many people are able to be out and proud in their identities. If you are someone who isn’t ready to come out, isn’t able to come out, or if you’re like me and are only able to be partially out, you are just as important to our community as anyone else. You aren’t betraying anyone, and you aren’t being indecisive. There are many ways to celebrate behind closet doors! We’ve been doing it for centuries, and some beautiful queer culture comes from the small ways we make ourselves visible to those who know. (This is the reason I will always have a soft spot for even our silliest little inside jokes) You can absolutely date from within the closet, and I promise you that you can have happy and fulfilling relationships the same as anyone else! Most importantly, find the people who support you and make you feel welcome, whether online or offline. Take time for yourself, and your mental wellbeing. Being closeted is often deeply painful, and it is important to keep your mental health at the top of your priorities. Cuff your jeans or eat some lemon bars or buy the frog tee shirt or paint your nails pink purple and blue or whatever other silly little things make you feel bi enough…because you are always bi enough.

[gacha-incels]

is there anything I can do to help? Does boycotting k-pop or kdramas help? Genuinely asking. I want to help Korean women so bad

Personally I’m not extremely familiar with kpop or kdramas because I don’t listen to or watch them and neither do any of my friends, so I hesitate to say anything specific regarding these due to ignorance. but as for something more general that’s easy to do… if any of the actors or musicians work with antifeminist production companies you can try raising awareness across social media regarding this and check to see if there are any ongoing boycotts from Korean fans. like anything it’s an uphill battle getting attention to serious issues like this over the topics easier to discuss on social media. like ngl I would love to have the predominant conversation around film be the very serious and pressing issue of safety on the set and not the amount of sex scenes but obviously one of these things is sensationalized and easier to talk about and thus will get more clicks than the other. all this to say don’t let it get you demoralized. even one voice is still better than none, and from all the threads I’ve reposted here one of the main things these women say people can do is educate themselves and raise awareness. this is something you can do online and offline.

for gacha games like Limbus Company for instance an ongoing boycott is relevant because these games not only measure success from spending players but also their daily active users (DAU) and monthly active users (MAU), terms you might have seen on this blog before. If it’s possible along with the boycott of that game I would suggest boycotting any games mentioned here that are guilty of antifeminism. as you may have read before, boycotting isn’t a one and done action, it requires consistency and sometimes a lifestyle change. that may sound dramatic but it’s easy to get in the habit of logging in, doing daily quests, planning for banners, awaiting new story quests and seasonal events in gacha games. It’s habit forming. I think this is part of the reason a game like Genshin got as big as it did, it came out during a time when most people’s lives were unstructured due to the pandemic, and it provided a clear daily structure with seasonal events. I would say to stop playing a game in this style would qualify a lifestyle change if you’re braking this habit. Try not to overwhelm yourself at first, it’s easy to do this, mess up, and then believe you can’t do it at all. For direct help, you can check if any of the women who get fired have any ways you can support them, like Vellmori’s patreon for example. If anyone knows any others lmk and I’ll edit it into the post.

in terms of monetary help for charities, typically I look for places like women’s shelters to donate to directly. Often you can send them hygiene items like pads which most places always need, for example I’ve done this for local places (especially grassroots orgs that work with homeless women), and for the women in Palestine. In terms of South Korea you can find places like this accepting donations just from searching but I would like to have a little more time to look into all these places before putting them here. If anyone has a place specific in mind that would be helpful to donate to lmk and I’ll add it to this post.

[custom-emojis]

how does it feel to have a large chronically online following

Painful. Deeply painful, as someone who was chronically online as a kid and am now a chronically online adult (that now has more than enough life experience under my belt to understand how being chronically online is just the worst and was deeply traumatizing). I’m in a bit to deep at almost 23 and using Tumblr since 2011 (and now am able to make my own mistakes and face my own repercussions for dumb shit I do online) but my god I hope some kids that follow me get outta this shithole. Here’s some life advice for chronically online kids coming from a chronically online adult;

Don’t list out your triggers. Anonymous assholes will use it against you for fun

Internet safety isn’t a joke. Don’t post sensitive info or your school or any of that shit.

Delete your trauma blog. Delete it.

Nobody cares about your online discourse irl please for the love of god stop getting involved in discourse that shit will leave you traumatized and an empty husk of a person I would know

Having interests and being involved in fandom doesn’t mean you’re chronically online, never let anyone tell you you’re too old for that or shame you. Let yourself enjoy things I know damn well I will be in my 30s still enjoying fandom. Old ppl are the ones who made it after all

This one is a bit complex to explain but you don’t have to Never Be Online to stop being Chronically Online and at least when I say it, I am not intending to be insulting. It just means your priorities are a little skewed due to lack of direct personal experience outside of online communities but that doesn’t mean you have to cut those online communities out. Or that you’re bad. Just use them to extend offline, find support groups, find friends you can hang out with IRL (safely and while communicating to your guardians) the internet is a powerful and great place by all means use it just also keep grounded in your local communities and don’t let the internet culture start clouding how you treat people and you’re good

I feel like it’s possible this anon was trying to be rude but I’ve decided to use this as a soapbox

[ftmtftm]

Hey ty for combatting that one post saying tranandrophobia isn't real. I came to tumblr on the recommendation that this was a space transmasculine ppl can actually find each other but it STILL seems swarming with radfem rhetoric on like every app I try to use. I'm so scared bc next week I have to get a pap test done at this WOMANS clinic (I have a full beard) and every time I go something happens. Nurses get scared of me and have sabatoged my papers. Gestured me to go somewhere else for genital care. Every time I go to pick up my T I have to be so careful bc my papers have been shredded to keep me from getting it. Transmasculinity is so lonely sometimes. I've been sexually harrassed by a chaser, who is a woman. I feel unsafe whenever I go outside.

So for people like us to come to websites like these to have fun and escape reality and STILL see people including trans ppl who SHOULD be understanding us completely ignoring our experiences and talking like they have spoken to any of us, seeing bad faith takes constantly about how we're all attention seeking liars (while simultaneously being invisible bc that makes sense somehow) and MRA preachers bc we want ppl to stop ignoring when trans men get hurt and talk about their pain and how we don't actually get magical privilege and how secretly everything we complain about HAS to be about a trans woman somehow to shut us down-

It makes me feel crazy. Bc I know it's real. Lots of us do. But they still keep getting so many notes from radfems and queer ppl who want to look good. It feels so hopeless sometimes. I wish everyone who reblogged that had read your addition instead. Sorry if that was long

No worries anon! Like, seriously never be worried about leaving a long ask in my inbox.

Tumblr is a really complex place when it comes to the safety of any trans person really, because Tumblr is pretty dependent on the way the user curates their dashboard (though with the app trying to force new users onto the algorithmic dash that is becoming less of a feature - which blows bc user curation part of the whole appeal of the site!) But I digress - It's absolutely really frustrating the way even the most well meaning queer people regurgitate Radfem rhetoric because they don't actually know what Radical Feminism is because the Radfem propaganda machine unfortunately works and it has had decades of time to work well.

It's also especially frustrating because it is extremely emotionally labor intensive to try and discuss these topics and so you end up with a lot of extremely burnt out, frustrated trans mascs who want to give words to their experiences but are constantly told their experiences don't matter both on and offline. Which then ends with people expressing themselves in ways that are infinitely easy to take out of context or twist in unfavorable ways. Like, there's a reason why when I'm upset about something on here - I try to talk to my girlfriend or my best friend first to gather my thoughts. It's something I know I fail at sometimes to some degrees, but ultimately I don't want to fall victim to something like that. It's why I try to talk about my experiences clinically sometimes. Show too much vulnerability online and it can and will be weaponized against you.

There is also something to be said about how the absolutely atrocious damage actual MRAs have done to feminist discussions on manhood under Patriarchy is deeply upsetting. Like I said in that post, it is actually absolutely not anti-feminist to attempt to understand the ways in which Patriarchy reinforces harmful gendered stereotypes and roles onto men, especially marginalized men. Actual MRA's have taken that discussion and twisted it into something misogynistic, but the ways in which people shut down general feminist conversations on the subject quite literally stem from Radical Feminist thought - not general feminist belief - and it's deeply upsetting that that isn't more widely recognized.

I think, ultimately, hurt people hurt people and Tumblr is an environment full of hurting people who don't know how to cope well with their own lives. Marginalized people are canaries in the coal mine of capitalistic failure and we're all suffering in some way or another. That combined with the fact that Tumblr culture rewards feeling bigger or morally superior to others creates an awful cesspool of an environment for having real discussions on marginalization.

All of that said, I really hope your appointment goes well anon. Hopefully it all goes smoothly and without complications. 💛

[spiraledfaun]

I'm a Deerboy Toy!

Welcome to my blog, everyone, I'm Faun, your friendly neighborhood deerboy ^^

🦌Facts About Me🦌

I'm 30

Grayromantic Demi-Bisexual

Trans Man (2 years on T!!! :D)

Exclusively a Submissive Bottom (though I will occasionally switch for other subs)

Dumb Slutty Hypnokinkster

Obsessed with Spirals

I write Hypnosmut

Erotica and Play Menu [Here]

I follow from another blog, so if you're a fellow kink blog assessing if we're mutuals for safety reasons, shoot me a message!

✅️Please Use These Terms✅️

Boy, man, guy, dude

Slut, toy, pet

Chest 👍🏻 (Paid good money to not have tits so this is the only word I'm good with rn)

Cock, dick, tdick, cocklet

Front hole, pussy, boypussy, cunt, boycunt -- I am a boy with a nice, wet hole. You can only use these terms with the "boy" part in mind :) Abuse these privileges, and I block you.

Dumb (not stupid), needy, desperate, slutty

Basically all degradation/humiliation through at least a mild praise kink lens

❌️Please Don't Do These❌️

Do not interact if you are under 18/a minor. I know different countries have different age thresholds, but this is my choice regardless. (Ageless blogs will be blocked)

Don't ask me for pictures. If I want to give you pictures, I will offer.

Don't assume I want to enter a dynamic with you! I am open to finding someone, but it does not consume me. I'm also grayromantic demisexual, which means, for me, I'm not interested in getting romantic with anyone new.

No misgendering/detrans/sissification/forcedfem kinks in my inbox or on my posts! I am a believer in kink and let kink, but those ones are going to stay far away from me, thank you.

Don't call me anything not in the lists! If you're unsure or think it's pretty close (like if I'm cool with slut, then Spiral Slut is fine) but isn't there, please ask, I'd so much rather answer a respectful question than have to block you for being a dick.

I love chatting with others, and my inbox is always open, and anon is always on, so feel free to chat or play~ I will always talk with any trans person, big T4T Vibes, so don't be shy and say hi! I'm open to playing or talking to anyone so long as you're respectful, but I will be more cautious if you're a cishet man.

😈Main Kinks😈

Hypnosis(/Brainwashing/Mind Control): The Big One. I love going down and feeling nice and fuzzy. Mmm. Yes please.

Spirals: This is not usually listed as a kink, but I love spirals, especially flashy ones that fill my mind 🤤

Corruption: Mostly sexual in nature, but I don't *not* enjoy religious corruption.

Tentacles: I am a big sucker (👀) for tentacles, especially in combination with other listed kinks.

Aphrodisiacs/Drugging: This mostly means weed (and fantasy drugs/pollen/nectar), but someday I want to (safely) try other things for this kink ^^

Toy/Pet Play/Free Use: Combined because they check a lot of the same boxes for me. I've never quite indulged in pet play before, but I am a deerboy and I love being petted 🥺

Exhibitionism: This is pretty much exclusively offline, but I do like being shown off, even online, and I like thinking about people watching me get off or get used and enjoying themselves 😊

Mommy/Lactation Kink: Very very specific, I want to be made to drink someone's milk from their breasts and have it corrupt/hypnotize/drug me 😅

CNC: emphasis on the Consent, but holy shit please it's so hot. I'm not into super violent stuff but more in line with my other kinks, for reference.

I am totally into one-offs, anons, new friends that I haven't met yet, and mutuals dropping in to drop me, so come play! I'm just a dumb, slutty little toy and I need to be used. 🥺

[scaryinclusive]

i know this seems lengthy, but please give it a read! this blog has one goal in mind - to make tumblr a safer space for the 'scary' side of neurodivergence. for some, this might act as a resource blog, for others it might be inflammatory and for hopefully the majority a place of safety and respect. i will be exploring and discussing the mental health disorders and conditions that don't fit into society's 'acceptable and appropriate' boxes, the ones that can't so easily be romanticised or that are too often fetishised, that face extensive, harmful and isolating stigma and ableism and that often suffer tremendously at the hands of misplaced blame and unaddressed trauma.

please approach this blog with an open mind and show the same respect you'd want to receive. i know it's easy to forget we're all people behind a screen but we are. anon is off, because i want to avoid hate speech where possible. this is for all corners of tumblr, including the roleplay community. i appreciate some of the things you might see may make you feel invalidated or might trigger you, but be patient and try to remain unbiased. at no point do i want or intend to offend or criticise you. if anything does, let me know and we can talk about it.

i personally face the daily stigma and ableism that comes with my own mental health - such as narcissistic personality disorder and antisocial personality disorder. i'm not about to make a list, but as someone that's experienced and witnessed this stigma and ableism an unbearable amount within the roleplay community and tumblr generally, as well as outside of my own home in the real world ( because as much as some would like to argue that being 'chronically online' is the root cause of facing mental health ableism, it isn't. ) i am as vulnerable and exposed to it offline as i am online. i do not condone generalising mental health and will treat every disorder and condition mentioned as a spectrum.

i am not the gospel, i am not the know all, but i've reached a place where i can't sit by and say nothing anymore while strangers demonise and villainise people like me without a second thought. often while insisting on receiving empathy, kindness, respect and compassion from those around them. mental health support doesn't stop at depression and anxiety. if you want to call yourself a supporter, and certainly if you want to use the title of 'empath', do the right thing and support everyone - yes, even society's 'scary' illnesses.

this starts with things such as altering your vocabulary. i'm not telling you to tip-toe around every word, but every word on that list holds weight and impacts those around you. it's very telling if this doesn't matter to you. be mindful that everyone deserves a safe support system, and everyone deserves compassion - even if they're not capable of reciprocating it themselves. everyone deserves to feel welcome. you can't expect individuals exhibiting harmful or negative behaviours, due to a background of trauma forcing them to develop in a specific way to survive, to seek help and healing while continuing to demonise and villainise them. this only serves to make us hide, bottling everything up until we can no longer cope, because we feel therapists are compromised by stigma and no one will be supportive or sympathetic to our situation. we cannot heal, despite ableists demanding it from us, because of them creating harmful media, stories, characters, assumptions and lies about us. this costs lives.

please note this isn't written in accusatory tone. nobody is perfect. i, myself, have experienced internalised ableism - due to society teaching me to project my own confusion, frustration, trauma and discomfort onto others instead of picking it apart, breaking it down and accepting myself. this is also frequent within the community, where individuals have been brainwashed to believe there's something 'wrong' with them, that they require 'fixing', dooming them to fail. that the only way to heal is to contribute to the ableism and stigma, to label themselves as evil and accept what a nuisance they are to society. it's just not true, and i refuse to believe we can't facilitate spaces for these 'scary' individuals, myself included, to heal and take responsibility in a positive way that benefits everyone, where blame isn't misplaced and trauma doesn't go undervalued. where people can learn that we're not so scary, but vastly misunderstood and misrepresented.

this blog does not support the ideology of 'narcissistic abuse', nor the placing of any disorder in front of 'abuse'. this is ableism. please read this short, non-accusatory, self-helping article to understand why. this is also another article, written by a professional, to help understand. emotional abuse, or just 'abuse' is adequate enough; i do not condone the besmirching and generalisation of an entire community in favour of misplaced and unaddressed trauma. hopefully you'll give this blog a chance, maybe even help me add to it. if not? that's okay. i'm not here to tell you what you can and can't do, but if you decide to follow the resources posted here i can promise that you'll be helping make a corner of the world safer for us. change really does start with you. and if you're asking why bother? does it even matter? read this post again.

[youremyheaven]

https://www.tumblr.com/youremyheaven/753538174357307392/astrologically-speaking-what-makes-a-person-copy?source=share

I’m the anon on this post. Update: I’m experiencing what you experienced. 😕 We’re like the same person now… Whatever I like, she likes too. She even took out her facial piercings to seem more elegant now because my style is elegant and feminine. She’s so impulsive and I feel like I’m talking to someone who will a different person the next time I see her?? She originally had a dark, witchy aesthetic (the total opposite of mine), but now she's changing her whole look to be very similar to mine, which I curated perfectly for myself after researching what suits me. We look different and have different body shapes, so I don’t know why she’s doing that. I became her friend because she was the opposite of me, and we could learn from each other. Instead, she's trying to emulate and take away what makes me unique. I remember watching a video by Claire Nakti about why people copy others, but I can’t seem to find it. :/

We both have Ketu and Venus influences, but our styles were different. Any of my interests become her favorite too after I show them to her. I’m gatekeeping now because I’m honestly defensive of my style and take pride in it. I might stop being friends with her because we’re too similar at this point, and everything I say or do eventually becomes something she likes. I just can’t deal with people who aren’t sure of themselves, especially when it comes to their own style. I just know for a fact that if I had a different style, like punk, she would change to that too. I definitely will not tell her my business ideas so she can run with them and make something out of it. That would just cross the line because I have a lot of business ideas yet to manifest. I think she copies me because I’m a creative and innovative person, who already has a sense of identity.

Bestie 😭😭😭😭😭

The war flashbacks I just had 🥹🥹

I hope you're okay? Here's a hug 🫂

It can be very disorienting to be in this position and I say this as someone who has been through it 🥲

Some tips on handling this:

1. Stop telling her your business

Not just creative ideas but anything. Don't share personal information with her. Trust me on this. These people become vampiric and start to overly identify with you. In a few weeks she'll start sharing your personal stories as if it were her own and weaponising your vulnerabilities and making you feel foolish for accusing her of it.

2. The sooner you can cut her out, the better.

This friendship cannot last long and I'm sure you know this too. But obviously there are probably other factors like being in the same social circle, class or work space that makes it harder to cut her out asap. However start establishing boundaries NOW.

keep a distance. however much possible. My Lunar friend was like a parasite. She leeched on to me online and offline. So I started to never text her, never reach out, never call her etc bc I saw enough of her irl 😭

3. Reach out to other people and stay in touch with them

This girl may or may not try to tarnish your image, gaslight you and cut you off from others, as she loses herself in you, so before it gets out of hand, create a different circle for yourself for your safety and protection 🫶

4. No matter what she does, she can never be you. Always remember that. She can never think like you, be like you or come close to it. It's easy to lose your sense of self in relationships like this but understand that she's a leech. You're not her (it can feel like you've become one enjoined entity after a while)

STAY SAFE TAKE CARE MAKE OTHER FRIENDS AND CUT HER OUTTT

[yermes]

Well guys its almost mothers day and after being around internet practitioners I know that some of you have some SERIOUS family issues. And or cannot see your moms this coming mothers day (Im away from mine atm) But thats okay. Ill be your mom today and give you some motherly advice with the deck that my mother gave me (:

So welcome to my Norwegian household there’s tea and chocolate swirl banana bread! (Usually I would make lefse for a baking venture but my parents wouldn’t let my grubby lil whore hands take the lefse press) so we have banana bread.

Pick a meme

Pick a card

Queen of Swords 🕯️

In this deck this card represents a more water aspect of air. The sharp thought of insight, and sitting upon her throne above the storm. While she does represent the chaos of the storm she also represents the cleansing aspect which chaos can bring. While seen as cruel, chaotic, and destructive i argue that these are needed qualities for change and growth. You may be in the eye of the storm now but the wisdom you will gain from this will be useful for the next time you are in a more chaotic shittier storm. (Sorry queen I feel ya a bitch can’t catch a goddamn break.)

Ace of Pents 🍀

Representative of earth and material manifestation. The people huddle close to the card in safety. However, the physical also needs the none physical to manifest. Don’t get to hung up on the material when the nonmaterial is lack luster. However, whenever possible relish in the safety and fulfillment which the physical and the matron can offer.

Seven of Swords 🤡

Wow. If fuck around and find out was in the dictionary your face would be right next to that shit. Basically, you tried however, you didn’t do enough. The seven of swords is a young soldier took the enemies swords but he left a few and his enemies rise to pursue him. Whether you get away or get yeeted is up to you. Roll for speed and charisma and hope you land a 20 😩

Whether you get to spend mothers day with your mom, are away from your mom, have a bad relationship and or not with mom I hope I could give you a little bit of that good motherly vibes today

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Take a forehead kiss^

Now for a long drawn out lecturey story about my life with an eventual point to really give you that empress matron energy you’re missing.

As a Chaos Magician who has been a terror on the internet for a little less then a decade I look back and see myself being heavily influenced by the people I was around.

(If you’re thinking you’re a chaos magician and all you post is tarot readings?I just refuse to give advice to the same internet that tried to curse the fucking moon okay? Okay.)

And you know what I am still influenced to this day. Not in the same ways obviously. When I first started my lil girlfriend at the time brought me into this kik group chat full of practitioners from different mental well beings (IYKYK) to different walks of life and some of these people are still my best friends to this day. Eventually we moved to discord but there was an issue. One of the bigger personalities of the group straight up didn’t like me. And thats fine. But it always got malicious super fast and eventually they got booted from the group along with a few others. But I notice looking back how I bended and shaped my “Germ” personality online to walk on eggshells around them. Now thankfully I was just shaping my online persona to please them while being myself offline but it taught me a lesson about morality and “isness”. Basically. Nothing is. No I won’t elaborate bc whats the fun in that. But Morality can be extremely empty. After being around all these talented practitioners and becoming one myself I saw that at times “bad” intentioned magic can have positive out comes and “good” intentioned magic can have some extremely awful outcomes. When you do magic and practice need to at times you need to realize that it will always manifest in a very realistic way and realistic isn’t always #livelovelaughlight

So anyways. This asshole tried to curse me and since my “Germsona” was so cataclysmically different than how I am IRL. It couldn’t hurt me. They tried to curse Germ not me and since Germ was so different and so molded to this individual I could walk away without a scratch. Be safe out there kiddos and remember I will always be here to give you awful and cringe advice ❤️

Love Germ

The nana bread 😩

[messengerhermes]

TLDR: Happy pride, please stop shoving trans women and trans femmes through the Whore/Madonna complex.

Hey I know I say this a lot, but it's Pride Month, so--- Please try to find queer community offline.

Specifically, try to find queer community that does not all look, act, and think exactly like you. It wigs me the fuck out to see how often on Tumblr in particular I see what is essentially gender essentialism dressed up in trans language--- ie this generalization of "trans masc" vs "trans femme" experiences. I came into myself in meatspace trans spaces. I was really really lucky for this. Trans women were the first other trans people I met. Trans women were everywhere in my community. Running the annual trans banquet. Riding up on chopper bikes to the monthly trans barbecues. Helping other immigrant trans people get situated in our city. Running clothing swaps, and fighting for BIPOC spaces, and showing up to drag shows. Trans women have never been an "other" to me, or somehow separate in their experience of transness from me. They've always been friends, mentors, allies, respected leaders. And the continuous thing I see online is this sense that trans mascs are from mars and trans femmes are from venus. And I gotta ask, what the fuck is going on, y'all? I've never had a trans woman willfully disrespect my gender. I've disagreed with trans women. I've been annoyed by trans women. But that had nothing to do with their gender, and attributing the very normal human experience of "sometimes you won't like someone, just because they're a bit irritating" to their gender identity is indeed, transmisogynist. I do not agree with every nonbinary person I meet. I sure as shit don't agree with every trans masc I meet. But deciding that those disagreements stem from our perspectives on gender, or our gendered experiences, as opposed to us having different personalities and different lives experiences, means buying into gender essentialism.

Please embrace the idea that you can disagree with other trans people and still be in community with them. Please examine your urge to dismiss trans women as somehow inherently bad????? because of their gender experience. Please consider how trans women are in a vulnerable position that might make them more wary, hesitant, and nervous about connecting with other trans people. Please consider how nonbinary people who get read as "more masculine" or assumed to be AMAB might be harmed by queer spaces hostility towards masculinity. Consider how that hostility has become so deeply rooted, that trans women can be extremely femme as still face that antagonism. We don't need to be doing the work of our oppressors by dividing ourselves y'all.

Someone telling you the truth that you don't experience the same kind of oppression they do is not the same thing as saying you do not experience oppression or hardships. A trans femme or trans woman acknowledging they or she experiences trans misogyny, a distinct form of transphobia, is not saying trans masc and trans men do not experience transphobia. It's acknowledging that she gets a very particular form of violence shot her way, and its roots are different than the roots of the aggression someone taken to be trans masc receives.

Acknowledging difference is not establishing hierarchy. Acknowledging difference creates the opportunity to start addressing the unique ways a problem shows up and must be addressed. Also, you will never find the perfect trans woman who has never done or said something awkward, mean, rude, or harmful. Because trans women are people. Even trans women who are absolute assholes still deserve safety from trans misogyny. Because protection from bigotry should never hinge on whether you have been judged a "good person" by some arbitrary social council. Please stop reinventing Calvinism.