#fucking blasting it in my headphones to the point it hurts i can still hear him in the background and it's . ghghghghghghghghghghgh

[ectonurites]

having really good hearing sucks sometimes because there are too many sounds and i feel like i need to explode and kill everyone

[dakotalun]

Want Part 2 | Eddie Munson

pairing: Eddie Munson X Fem Reader

summary: PART 2-- Eddie hangs out with someone and you confront him about it. Eddie shows up again with a surprise.

warnings: oral (f. receiving), praise kink, pet names (good boy, baby, ma'am, babe), sub!eddie, fingering, swearing

word count: 2.9k

a/n: been a whole month...whoopsies. But I am coming back with a nice and long fic for y'all. I also have a few things in the works that will be multi parted. I hope y'all enjoy and have an amazing day!! :)

*******NOT MY GIF, CREDIT TO OWNERS*******

Eddie's been gone for what feels like hours, I’m completely broken and hurt while he's probably off with Chrissy again. Out of all the things I could've done today, I chose to ruin my relationship. I slowly raise to my feet but upon seeing the plate that Eddie had haphazardly thrown to the counter I start to feel sick. I rush to the bathroom and throw up.

Hours pass by. I'm sitting on the cold bathroom floor, refusing to move. I've thrown up twice since Eddie left me, once when I realized what he had been doing for most of the day and again after throwing up everything that was in my stomach. He still hasn't called or texted me. I really fucked this up. And I have no clue how I'm going to fix it.

My stomach tightens again as I feel another wave of vomit come up. And that's how I spend the night, laying on the bathroom floor occasionally barfing as I cry over Eddie. I can't believe I've made such a big mistake.

I wake up the next morning feeling drained and exhausted. The events from last night are still fresh in my mind and I can't seem to get myself out of bed. I turn over, a sliver of hope that Eddie came home last night. But all I find is the empty, cold space where he should be. I grab my phone from the nightstand and check for any messages, nothing. A sigh leaves my mouth as I come to the full conclusion that I should maybe leave for a while, this was Eddie's trailer first after all.

I peel myself out of the sheets and trudge to the bathroom. Getting back I search the messy closet we share for my duffel bag, finding it under a mess of dirty clothes and an old amp Eddie keeps saying he'll throw out. I pick out some comfortable jeans and a few t-shirts, stuffing them into the bag and slipping my feet into a pair of sneakers.

After grabbing my phone charger and headphones I grab the keys from the counter and walk outside. A cold gust of wind blows in my face as the seasons change from summer to fall. I plug my headphones in but just as I'm about to put them on I hear a loud boom of music coming from the street entrance of the trailer park.

I look up to see none other than Eddie driving his van, music blasting and flowing through the open windows. He's driving with little regard for anything around him, nearly hitting the neighbor's fence before parking. He shuts the van off and hops out, stumbling slightly. Yeah he's clearly drunk, or at least he was at some point since I last saw him. His face is red and slightly swollen, stains line his face from tears.

He finally looks up to see me standing on the porch of the trailer, staring at him a broken look in my eye still. He slowly and hesitently steps towards me.

"Hey," Eddie reaches up and rubs the back of his neck, a nervous tic.

"Hi."

The two of us stand there for a few seconds just looking at each other taking in the events of last night. I'm the first to talk.

"I'm gonna stay with Rob for a few days, just so we can kinda, you know," I don't finish the sentence, too scared to make this a reality.

"Don’t. Please," His eyes are softer now, no anger or resentment behind them. Just pure love and adoration, "I need you here. Please stay."

"Eddie," I look down at my feet, now finding the slowly rotting floor boards more interesting, "Look, I wish I could stay with you. I really do, but after last night. After what you said, what I said. I just don't think it's a good idea."

I don't notice how his face drops, a small frown taking place on his lips. He takes a few more steps closer to me, now at the bottom of the porch.

"Please. I don't want to lose you too. Not after all this time. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me." His words break my heart all over again, "You coming into my life was the besy thing to ever happen to me. I wouldn't have ever had the courage to really try and finish high school without you." 

He speaks he walks up the steps, getting closer to me, enough to finally smell the alcohol on him, "If I could go back in time and not hang out with Chrissy I would, in an instant. But I can't," He's finally reached me. He brings his hands out to hold mine, I look at him. Really look at him for the first time since yesterday. I can see how much he means this, and how much he wants me to say I'll stay.

"I don't know if I can trust you anymore Eddie. You lied to me about where you were, and what you were doing. You're still selling even after I told you not to," I scan his face, trying to find something, anything, "And then there's Chrissy-"

"There's nothing going on between me and her, I promise! I really was just catching up with an old friend."

"Then why did you leave?" There it was. The question at the top of my mind ever since he walked out that door, why. If she was just an "old friend" then he shouldn't have felt the need to leave me. To let me cry until I was physically ill.

I pull my hands away from his, missing the warmth of them. I start to head towards my car, needing to be out of here, out of his space, away.

"Wait, please," He turns with me, following, "Babe, I love you with everything I have, and ever will have. You are the only person on this planet for me. You're the only person I can open up to. The only one I can be myself around, I need you."

He's saying all the right things except for one, the one I really need to hear from him. I stop and harshly turn to him, "I know Eddie! I know you love me and need me and all that bullshit but that's not what I asked you! I asked if you want me? If I will be enough for you, if I'm just another girl for you to fuck and pretend to love before you throw me off to the side like trash? So, do. you. want. me?"

My hands are shaking, both from the cold and my anger. I wait for him to answer, wishing he would just say yes so we can go back to normal or no so I can move on and get away from him.

"I- OF COURSE! I want you more than anything!" He runs up to me, placing his hands on my cheeks, shielding them from the cold. "Could you come with me?"

"What?" I’m confused by the sudden change in questions. Where could he possibly want me to go right now?

"Just come with me? I need to- I want to show you something, please," He's begging. Eddie Munson has never begged for anything in his life and yet here he is, practically on his hands and knees for me.

"Fine," I sigh.

His eyes light up, hands falling from my face to interlock with mine. He pulls me to his van, opening the door like he always does. Forever a gentleman. He all but sprints to the driver's side before quickly starting the old van and driving out of the lot he just came into.

We drive to the other side of town, where all the rich kids live. We trun the corner and Eddie looks over to me.

"Close your eyes."

"Huh?"

"Close your eyes. It's a surprise," A grin has spread across his face, crinkling the sides of his eyes.

I groan lightly before shutting my eyes, wondering what the hell Eddie is up to now. Not long after, we are parking and Eddie's grabbing my hand to lead me wherever we are at.

I giggle a little as he all but pushes me through a doorway, "Eds what are you doing? Where the fuck are we?"

"You'll see, just keep those pretty little eyes closed alright?" He walks me a few more steps before postioning me in place, "Alright, open."

I open my eyes and am momentarily blinded my the bright florescent overheads before noticing we are standing in front of a door.

"Eddie. What the hell is this?" I turn to look at him, his signature shit eating grin plastered on. He holds up his keys, searches for the right one then opens the door in front of us. He leads me inside, looking at my every facial movement.

"This," He gestures to the large empty living room, "is our new apartment. That is if you're not still mad at me?" His face is soft and sweet, waiting for my answer.

"Eddie this is- how did you? I don't understand," I shake my head slightly trying to understand what's going on here, "What do you mean this is our apartment?"

Eddie stands in front of me blocking my view. He reaches for my hands and holds them in his, taking away some of the anxiety I have right now.

"I've been working extra hours at the auto shop down on Main, and selling a little bit too," My face drops, "I know you told me to stop! But I saw this place a while ago, when Wayne was house hunting. And I just knew it was perfect for us."

He squeezes my hands, pulling me to the large windows on the other side of the room, it overlooks Main Street and all the little shops he knows I love, "Every dollar I’ve earned this past year has gone into a down payment on this place. It took a lot of haggling with Ted on my wages but I finally had enough. Then we had our fight last night," He looks down, ashamed at himself for what happened, "When you asked if I wanted you I don't know what happened but I just knew that now was the time to finally pay for it. So I raced down here and payed the guy, because I want nothing more than to have you in my life forever."

As he's talking, I realize I'm crying, I can't help it, I feel so much joy and pain all at once. Eddie's hands grip tighter, keeping me from falling to the floor, "If you don't want this just tell me, give me the word and I won't bother you again," He places his finger below my chin to make me look at him, his eyes are rimmed with tears just like mine are, "But before you do just let me tell you what I did last night was stupid and I promise I will never do that again. I love you with everything I have and I always will. But if I hurt you too much just tell me and I'll back off."

I can't think straight when he looks at me like that, his big brown doe eyes staring at me with all the love a person could ever hold. I look around the apartment one last time, out the big window to our right, and finally back at Eddie.

"Alright."

"What? Alright? Like you'll live here with me?!" His smile has returned, eyes finally letting the tears fall.

"Yes, Eddie. I'll move in here with you," He picks me up off my feet in a giant bear hug, spinning us in place as he yells in excitement, "On one condition."

He puts me down, hands still around my waist, not letting me move any further away, "Anything. Just name it."

"No more selling. You focus on school and I'll focus on the bills."

"Baby I can't-"

"This won't be for forever Eds. Just until you graduate then we can both pay the bills, just please promise me that?"

"Yes ma'am." He smiles and pulls me into a searing kiss. One that feels like we haven't kissed in years, and won't ever get the chance again. The kiss makes me weak in the knees and I can feel the wetness growing in my pants.

Eddie groans into the kiss before pulling away, "I gotta stop kissing you or else we'll be ruining this place before we even move in."

"And what's so bad about that? It seems like it needs a good cristining don't you?"

"Babe," Eddie's eyes grow wide and look to the side of us, where the floor length windows stand, uncovered, "We can't. What if people see us?"

I walk over to the window and look out onto the street. It's a quiet day, only a few people walking around. "So what? They'd all get to know that you're mine and I'm yours. Forever."

I can feel Eddie's chest on my back as he presses against me, his boner growing slowly, "My naughty girl," His hands go to my hips but before they can travel anywhere I turn around and pin them to his sides.

"That's ma'am to you. Got it?" I don't know where this confidence came from but I’m enjoying it. And so is Eddie, he nods his head vigirously, "Sorry I can't hear you."

"Yes ma'am."

"That's my god boy," Eddie's eyes close at the nickname, his body shivering, "You like that don't you? You like being called my good boy?"

"Mhmm. Yes ma'am."

I stand on my tiptoes to reach Eddie's ear and whisper, "Then get on your knees and show me just how good of a boy you are."

Before I can even blink Eddie is on his knees in front of me, unbuckling my jeans and pulling them down to my ankles. The sight of the wet patch on my panties has me in pieces, slowly losing all composure.

He looks up to me as he hooks his fingers into the waistline of my underwear, "May I?" I nod and he pulls them down, the slick from me making them stick to my folds. He groans and starts kissing up my thighs, towards the place I need him most. His kisses are featherlight, slowly making me dizzy, I wish he would go faster.

"Eddie," I sigh as he finally plants a kiss to my clit, so soft it's almost missed. Once he gets a taste of me he dives right in, licking a stripe up my folds to collect the juices. He moans at the taste, licking me like a dog starved.

I unravel above him, my knees becoming weak and numb. The way he eats me out is heavenly and I’ve never wanted a thing to stop less than right now. Moans and sighs are falling past my lips with each lick and suck of Eddie's mouth. I begin to feel that wonderfully familiar knot tightening and begin tightening around Eddie's tongue. He feels it and moves his ministrations up to my clit and shoves two fingers into my entrance.

"Fuck!" I keel over on top of Eddie, one hand braced on his head and the other on his shoulder, "Just like that. I'm so close Ed." Eddie picks up speed and bends his fingers to reach that spongey spot inside with every thrust of his fingers.

"Come on baby. Cum for me, let me taste you. I missed the way you taste so much. Please come for me, please."

His words send me over the edge, white lights blinding me as the string finally snaps and I’m cumming all over Eddie's face and fingers. He doesn't stop his movements, he pulls me through my orgasm, spewing words of affection and love the entire time. Once he notices that I’m starting to slow down he releases his mouth from me and removes his fingers, eliciting a whine from my lips.

"Thank you, thank you so much," Eddie slowly stands, holding me as my leg strength still haven't come back.

"That's my good boy," I pull him in for a kiss, tasting myself on him. He pushes into me making his erection rub against my exposed thigh. His eyes squeeze shut at the feeling.

"Can I fuck you now?" His eyes are pleading and full of lust.

"Take me home first, Eddie," I look into his eyes and feel nothing but love for this man. The way he treats me with so must love and attention makes me want ot hold on nad never let go, no matter what happens to us.

"We are home sweetheart. This is home now."

"I know. I just love the sound of it," I pull Eddie in for another kiss, this one sweet and gentle. Nothing like the ones from before, only love and adderation fills this, as I try to show him how much I feel for him.

I’m so caught up in the kiss that I don't even notice Eddie dip down quickly and place his hands on my thighs, but before I can question he lifts me up. I instinctivly wrap my legs around his hips and circle his neck with my arms.

"Eddie!" I squeal from my upward position.

"What? I wanna take you to the bedroom, it's got a walk-in closet," He smirks at that last little detail before walking down the hall toward the rest of the apartment.

Eddie Taglist: @ali-r3n @dixontardis

[venusmlp]

so my best friend wanted to fuck my ex boyfriend aka the love of my life, the only boy that i ever loved. It's okay, I'm not mad at her anymore, I've dealt with it. But the feelings are still here.

To start this, diary. I have to update you on something. There's a huge possibility I'm autistic. And all my friends and peers think the same. Even my mom. I'm getting a proper diagnosis soon. I'm not gonna go in extent on how they pick on me over it or whatever, this entry is not about that. With that in mind, i have my noise canceling headphones, as one does, and i use it all the time. The problem is that people like to take advantage of me with it, telling me to put it on so they can talk shit without me listing. Sometimes about me! WITH ME AT THE TABLE! I'm not stupid of course, so I always debated rather i wanted ro hear the conversation or not. If it's none of my business, then I blast the music and let them talk in peace. But if the conversation is about me??? I'm gonna fucking hear it, my headphones aren't that good at canceling noise without music on. I'm not stupid. The day it happened i hear my friends talking shit like "i have a problem, i always take interest in the boys she [me] likes" "be with him, she doesn't need to know" "no. this boy? she would kill me". I immediately thought they were talking about my ex boyfriend and was in chock. But I have a hard time processing audio sensory information so I gaslighted myself thinking It wasn't what I thought.... it was.

Ok, I started to notice that he wasn't talking with me with the frequency he once did. At first I didn't mind, he has he's own life and i don't expect him to talk 24/7. I don't want to talk 24/7. But it got to a point that he wasn't even responding my tweets. That wasn't weird untill I realized that he was commenting on all her posts and her in his. She was talking about him frequently. AND THEY NEVER USED TO BE FRIENDS. that was suspicious of course but again. I pretend it was nothing... It was

In school for some reason, I don't remember why, the topic of "is it ok to date your best friend's ex" came up and they both said it's not a problem for them, they are cool with it. I said I wasn't and that i don't think it's a cool thing to do. Which is completely okay to think. People think that you know. Suddenly I was trapped in a 1 hour long hypothetical debate about how I was selfish for thinking like that, creating scenarios where it looked like i was preventing a beautiful love story from happening. (Spoiler, i wasn't. They were just horny teenagers) I explained that i love him (which they both always knew), i explained that he was not only my boyfriend at the time of the rape but also literally MY COUSIN'S BEST FRIEND (he didn't know what his friend did to me at the time, don't blame him) i explained how, because of so many reasons, he was a person very special to me, someone that is engraved in me and i can't help it. That he was off limits. Someone that i love. But still IT WASN'T ENOUGH TO CONVINCE. they called me a hypocrite for demanding this when I didn't do what they asked of me (which was something I recognize i was wrong, and once I finally understood it, i apologized sincerely). Still i was called selfish and i wasn't understanding why. Why were they calling me a hypocrite comparing something that actually happened with a hypothetical scenario? And then they said it wasn't hypothetical. That she was flirting with him and wanted my blessings. And of course I panicked. My fears were right, my best friend really did that.. it hurt so much and i cried like a baby in the middle of the classroom. she reassured me that nothing had happened yet and that she wanted to tell me the truth bf anything.

I of course said no. I said I wasn't okay with it. i cried. I said I loved him. The whole story brought back bad feelings and i was feeling bad again. really bad.

Okay couple of days passed and i did the Enem, had a shit performance in it. But fine whatever. Didn't talk with almost nobody after it. I watched tiktoks, sent it to my friends and went to sleep. The morning the first think I get after I wake up is a call from my ex boyfriend and my best friend.. fine whatever. We chat a bit, complain about the entrance exam and our grades and i say I don't want to go to the beach (my friend wanted to go) bc i hate the beach (everyone that knows me knows that i hate hate hate the beach) chat a bit more and we all said goodbye. we had gone to the beach like two weeks ago btw. It attacks my sensory issues i HATE the beach, i literally feel sick in it. last time I almost drowned. The last time I went to the Beach with my parents was like 5 years ago. The only reason I go today, is bc my friend likes it and i want to please her and make her happy. But I can't go often, i makes me have meltdowns. So I said no. But okay, some hours later I receive a text about how incentive i am. I didn't understand why but ok again. we resolved the situation. She needed me bc she was sad over the exam and wanted to go out, but I had not realized that with the vague information she had given me on the call. So I said no bc i hate the beach. I apologized. She also highlighted the fact I didn't ask my other friend how her exam went. i had actually forgotten to ask bc i was too stressed out, spent the day helping my mom and then went to the doctor. I wanted to apologize too but my friend said she was pissed at me and she had blocked me. I was also pissed at her bc of the whole ex boyfriend thing (she was committed to prove i was wrong for feeling the way I felt and let my best friend fuck my ex) but I wanted to resolve it so everything could be okay. She doesn't want to talk to me anymore bc she doesn't recognize my apology from the day of the hypotheticals, and apparently me being mad at her for the way she dealt with the ex boyfriend situation was unacceptable.

Summarizing it. Once again autism has ruined my relationships. Thank you, it's been my whole life. My difficults in understanding what normal people take from granted has again and again made people around me loose their patience and get mad at me. It's always "it's not bc you're autistic" but the reasons they use to why they're mad are almost ALL autistic treats. And I'm saying that about not only the reasons they used today but also almost EVERYTIME they had criticized me bf. They say how difficult if is.. imagine for me that has to live with it? don't they think I wish I could be just normal? that i would be if I COULD BUT I CAN'T? i always miss on social cues and have to hear they saying how wrong i am. for breathing. I know I'm not right all the time, i know. But Jesus i'm not perfect, i have a disability. i didn't choose this. I didn't choose to be like this. I care for them SO MUCH but omg idk if someone needs me if they don't tell me they need me. I just don't know. I need them to tell so I can help. But I can't guess it.

I'm broken, a failure, a disgrace and I'm gonna end up alone some bc of this shit

[stuckyxren]

You are stuck in your head.

You had your first mission in two weeks, right after you experienced a breakup that rattled your bones. Your thoughts were already muddled and seeing the horrors of your recent mission did nothing to help that.

Kids. They were just kids. You had no choice. You, Wanda, Vision, and Nat had no choice but to engage. It was kill or be killed, but that doesn’t stop the pain.

The ride back was silent. Nat flew quicker than she ever had before. She just wanted to get home and be alone. Wanda and Vision were huddled together in a secluded corner. You were sat at the back of the plane.

You sent the mission footage to Fury, seeing as nobody would be able to write a report anytime soon. Since there was nothing left to take care of, you put in your Stark issued noise canceling headphones and started listening to some music to attempt to get out of your head. Silent tears cascaded down your face as the images rushed past your eyes.

You were so stuck in your head that you didn’t realize that you were back at the tower. Everyone else disembarked and went their own way. You sat motionless in your seat, huddled close to yourself as your kind kept throwing up the images. You felt sick.

Jarvis announced the jet’s arrival to the compound. So, when you didn’t come onto the floor you shared with Bucky and Steve, your best friends came looking for you. Jarvis led them to you and it was a good thing the AI did.

Bucky and Steve slowly approached when they saw your huddled, shaking form. They were debriefed with what they needed to know to take care of you, but they assumed you would come inside.

Instead, Bucky silently reached you, picking you up and carrying you inside when you didn’t respond to their attempts at getting your attention. Steve opened doors all the way to your bathroom. Bucky sat down, pulling your headphones out slowly and started pulling you out of your suit. They knew you wore a tank and bike shorts underneath, so they stripped down to their boxers, leaving you in the clothes from under your suit. Steve turned the shower on full blast, as hot as he could stand it, and sat down at the farthest end of the stall. Bucky got in, still holding you, and sat in between Steve’s legs with his back pressed against Steve’s chest.

After a while, your silent tears became choking sobs. Bucky held you tighter as the sobs wrecked your entire being. Steve murmured words of comfort as he allowed Bucky to take the majority of control of the situation. Bucky knew more about being out of control of a situation. They both knew this was different, but it was closer to Bucky’s ball park.

Anger flooded your being as your sobs grew louder. Bucky allowed you to beat on his chest for a few minutes before he let Steve grab your wrist. You opened your eyes and stared at Bucky. The boys could see the wheels turning and the absolute grief that was crashing over you again.

Choking on air, you gagged harshly. Bucky was quick to turn your around and grab your hair as you lost control and threw up in the drain. He knew that feeling all too well. Many nights, Steve had to do the same thing for him after waking up from a memory from his Winter Soldier days.

In between bouts, you screamed and cried, clawing at your neck and throat. You tried ripping at your tank top to get anything restricting off, but Steve eventually leaned up and grabbed your hands, shushing you.

“Hey. Slow down. Just let it happen.” Steve soothed, rubbing his thumbs on the insides of your wrists. “I know you feel like you can’t breathe, but once the vomiting passes, we will work on that. It’s okay.”

“We gotcha doll.” Bucky hummed, rubbing your chest while holding your hair back. “I’ve gotcha. Just let it out.”

You continued to throw up until you finally ran empty. You gasped around dry heaves as the nausea tapered off, but the anxiety ran strong. Steve grabbed your washcloth and wiped off your mouth before he cupped his hand to catch enough water for you to rinse with.

Eventually, the water began to run cold as you all sat there. They let you fold into yourself slightly, allowing you to collect yourself a little before they washed your hair and all the blood off of your with gentle touches. They told you everything they were doing and moved quickly so that you wouldn’t get cold.

Once the boys had you out, dried off, and helped you get dressed, they took turns leaving to get dressed. Bucky went first so that he could get you comfortable for when Steve got back.

When Bucky took you and get you both situated under the covers, he began to whisper to you. “You just tell us when your ready.” Bucky said. “We won’t push you, but you don’t need to hold it in Doll.”

Taking a shuddering breath, slowing down ever slightly, even though you still gasped, you finally spoke, “T-tthey werrrre jjuu-sss kkkkk-ids.” You sobbed as you finally spoke it out loud.

Bucky, surprised but glad to see some progress, held you closer, leaving a feather light kiss on the top of your head. “I know sweetheart.”

Steve rounded the corner and quickly came to join you and Bucky. Steve rubbed your back as you continued.

“We had nno ccchhh-oice. I-I had tto kk-kill them.” You sobbed out. Anger and grief and so many other emotions flew through your veins as the boys attempted to console your shaking form. “It’s nnnot fff-fair.”

“I know. We know.” Said Steve, noticing the rage and absolutely grief in Bucky’s eyes and knowing his lover needed a second. “You did the right thing. It may not feel like it, but you had to do what you had to do. Nobody blames you doll.”

Bucky knew Steve said the wrong thing before you even popped up and spun around on him. “I BLAME ME.” You screamed. “I-Iii.” You shook your head, taking a breath to force the trembling of your voice to stop. “I had the intel. I made the plan. I walked us into a gun fight WITH FUCKING CHILDREN. CHILDREN STEVE.”

Bucky pulled you back, feeling awful for Steve as the hurt flashed across his face. “Hey. Calm down. He knows that.” Bucky spoke into your ear. “What he is trying to say is that we know the choice was a difficult one and we respect your decision. We would have done the same in your shoes. Fury showed us the footage so that we would be prepared.”

“Yeah. I didn’t mean to upset you.” Steve said, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked down.

You sighed and gently took his hand. “No Stevie. I’m sorry. I’m just so tired. I can still feel the weight of the mission on my chest. See the look of terror on the faces of the kids as they watched their friends get shot before abandoning their efforts and running. Hearing them scream as our bullets pierced their skin. It was awful.” You cried, recounting the memory.

“I understand. I do.” Bucky replied, pulling you and Steve to lay down and get snuggled up. “Sometimes, the choices are made for us. That choice was made for you. They attacked first and it was defense.” Before you could object, he put a hand up to stop you. “Yes, they were children who probably were raised to do this, and it doesn’t make it any easier to know that, but just remember that even though you had to do what you had to do, you just saved millions of lives.”

You nodded as your eyes got droopy. Your head lulled back as Bucky’s words relaxed you and Steve’s gentle touches soothed you.

“Go to sleep Y/N.” Steve murmured, kissing the back of your head. “We aren’t going anywhere.”

——————————————-

The rest of the night, Steve and Bucky comforted you through nightmares and eventually got you to eat a little bit at one point, when you began dry heaving again and they convinced you to save yourself some pain.

But they helped you make it through the first night.

Then every night after.

No editing was done. I apologize in advance.

[londonskies]

DON’T SAY THE S WORD!!

https://images.app.goo.gl/JKKNVtwZNGAVVwzB9

In which Corpse has a secret girlfriend and his insomnia is driving them both up the wall, putting precious Sykkuno in danger because he said the word “Sleep”. 

Hi! This is just a once in a blue moon, feel good, fluff fic cause I have commitment issues on my writing lol. 

Yes, my writing style is long winded, I’m really sorry, but I hope you enjoy it! 

credits to  u/balderdash_lee on reddit

Corpse had not slept for close to 50 hours by the time that they had started their latest month prior pre-planned plasmophobia session with Rae, Sykkunno and Toast, but it was like he was hyped up on sugar for the last hour or so and Y/n was really beginning to get worried. 

This was a tattletale sign of the huge crash her boyfriend was about to go through, and yet the stubborn man just would not step away from his computer.

She had tried everything, from luring him with pizza (to which he had snatched a few slices and had just retreated to his gaming room once more) to telling him that there was a fire in the kitchen (to which he replied was virtually impossible given how meticulous Y/n was in the kitchen) to faking an injury (which corpse called bullshit on without even looking at her).

It was getting really frustrating and she knew for a fact that the longer her boyfriend was going to wait this out, the worse he was going to feel.

And the worse he was going to act. 

He would never hurt anyone, ever. The man was the definition of a soft boi beyond his brain meltingly amazing voice. But when he was beyond bone dead tired like he was right now, he had the tendency to act mean, and the only person who had the capability of calming him down in the middle of the pandemic was Y/n, and she would have to hijack his stream. 

The stream that was filled with hundreds of thousands of people who didn’t even know that their precious Corpse was in a relationship with anyone. 

Would she have the chance to mute him before he went on his tired, angry, borderline crazy monologue? She would try, but probably not. 

Y/n had to bring out the big guns. 

Rae and Toast were pretty easy people to conspire with and were almost always down to do pranks and other shit that Y/n came up with, and always, always down to do whatever it took to get Corpse to take care of himself. 

Sykkuno though, bless him, the cutest, most clueless person Y/n had ever met. 

He was always very concerned for Corpse’s health but was the worst at going incognito. So Rae and Toast were the ones who used their code word (lights out) and had always been the ones who had the role of making sure Sykkuno knew what to do. 

“Aaaaaaaaaaanddd, lights out baby!” Rae screamed as she made her way past Sykkuno at the entrance of the house they were in at the moment, but Sykkuno, the precious little boy that he is, just watched Rae with a bewildered face, getting even more confused when Toast made his way past him as well, whispering “Lights out.” and moving back to the truck in the game. 

From inside, Corpse’s character was busy laughing at a joke he made about a picture in the wall and had not noticed the other two missing. He did notice though, when Sykkuno appeared near him to ask him what was up before convulsing and dropping to the floor. 

Corpse’s laugh was noticeably more manic now, getting a lot more high pitched and erratic. For a second, Sykkuno laughed with him, then when Corpse’s went on for too long, suddenly looked confused on his stream, turning to face the general vicinity he Corpse’s character was. 

So he spoke through their always open discord chat. “Uhh, Corpse? You okay there buddy?” 

The stubborn man just kept laughing, Y/n increasingly getting concerned as she watched all 4 player’s streams on different devices one room over. Rae and Toast were chatting about the pills in the truck, so as to not alarm Corpse of the lowkey distraction they were doing to finish the game easy (aka getting at least 3 of them killed), and then giving excuses to stop streaming and giving Y/n a chance to haul his ass to bed. 

Sykkuno on the other hand, was now (against all plans spoken about prior) continuing to talk to Corpse. 

“Corpse?” the timid man spoke once more, finally reaching the ever more manic Corpse. 

All of a sudden, an eerie silence fell around the two of them, settling for a few seconds before getting filled by a flat “Yea?” from Corpse. 

Y/n could almost hear the sentence that Sy would reply to that, and at that moment, she knew, they were fucked. 

With a quick “Fuckin shite” to both Rae and Toast’s chat, Y/n bounded over to Corpse’s office, hearing tail end of the question that was about to make Corpse’s brain go kaboom. 

“You sound tired man, maybe you should sleep for a bit?” 

She knew he only meant good. Sykkuno was just one of those guys that would never want to hurt anyone. She knew it, Corpse knew it, everyone knew it. 

But her secret boyfriend was sleep deprived and going batshit crazy because of it, and currently, his trigger word was the word Sleep.

Y/n would give poor Sy a viking funeral if she can’t stop this.

“I am not tire-” Corpse was pretty intimidating when he wanted to be, and I knew that that low voice of his would scare every single hitman in a 1000 mile radius when used in a booming, angry way. And the way his voice was escalating was sure to end in said booming, angry way.

Y/n sprinted into his recording room, only partially wincing at the horridly loud bang the door made when she wrenched it open to fling herself at her boyfriend. The world seemed to slow as she soared through the air, uncaring if she knocked things out of the way. 

Gotta make sure their baby Sy would never be at that end of Corpse’s fury. 

She partially landed on his lap, torso hanging off the side. It hurt as her ribs made contact on the armrest of his computer chair, but it stopped his tirade with a surprised “Ooof!” and knocked him away from his PC.

“Honey!! Don’t yell at Sy!” 

“Y/n???”

Oh shit. 

Of course Sykkuno had to yell out her name during a stream. She had bet Toast 200 dollars that Sy would be the one to drop her name, and it was high time she cashed in. 

Y/n fixed herself on Corpse’s lap, shoving his headphones off of him and forcing him into a hug. Of course he protested, but eventually relaxed in her grip, muttering about how his eyes and wrists hurt now but he promised to play with the OTV peeps and his insomnia hit him too hard these past few days. 

“Baby,” he whispered hoarsely, his grip tightening on her as well. It only took a moment for Y/n to realize that her boyfriend was shaking, trying not to fall apart. “It hurts.” 

She ran her fingers through his hair, putting a kiss on the top of his head as he relaxed even more. They had to move to a more comfortable space soon or else Corpse would fall asleep here and she would have to move him (which at 5 feet, is not very easy.) but he was relaxing and Y/n couldn’t make herself distract him from that. 

“I know babe, it’s okay. We’ll breathe through it. You can do it, I know you can.” Corpse would never fess up to crying, but the growing patch of tears on her sweater was evidence of the amount of pain that he was experiencing. 

His dedication was amazing, but a lot of the time he sacrificed his health for it. So as much as she didn’t want to hold him back, sometimes she really just had to step in and meddle to save him from himself.

They stayed like that for a while, Y/n occasionally having to coach him through his breathing, but overall, they were doing fine. 

Y/n smiled into his hair when he finally stopped shaking. “That’s it babe, you’re doing amazing.” she whispered, moving to get off his lap. She wasn’t the lightest person despite her shortness, her curves never letting her be skinny, so she was sure that her sitting on his lap was making his legs go numb. Corpse, on the other hand, only held on tighter, basically turning into a koala at this point. 

“Corpse, Honey, your legs are gonna go numb, babe.” she giggled. She tried to put him at arm’s length, but her apparently octopus boyfriend had planned to never let her go. 

“No.” he mumbled, pressing his face ever tighter into her sweater, making her giggle, in turn, making him smile. 

Eventually, he detached his face from her sweater and peeked up at his girlfriend, the visual of his tousled hair, pout, one sparkling eye and the other now only partially covered by his falling eyepatch, but both with smudged eyeliner and mirth, made her melt.  “Don’t go, please?” Y/n giggled at him. “I’m not gonna leave babe, I just gotta get off your lap before I make your legs undergo hypoxia.” 

“I’d let them cut off my legs if it meant having you here forever.” if she hadn’t already fallen in love with this man, she would say that this was the moment that she fell in love with him. But falling in love with him over and over again was probably something that she would never stop doing, even if Corpse ever decided to not love her back one day. 

They were jolted out of their happy little bubble when they heard a loud screech coming from his headphones making a sound more akin to blasting speakers than headphones, which had apparently fallen just beside them on the table instead of the floor like Y/n anticipated. “STOP YOUR LOVING AND GO TO SLEEP CORPSE!” Rae screeched, making the both of them laugh out loud, but one look at his screen stopped them at their tracks.

Corpse was miraculously still alive in game, Rae’s character moving back and forth in front of his. 

Rae… was streaming, right? 

Oh shit numero dos. 

One look at the chat showed that they had just outed themselves. The sappy couple making everyone watching go absolutely bonkers at the chat. 

“WHO IS THAT?” -ijustlovemakingsounds

“HONEY???? BABE?????” - corpseybae

“WHAT IS HAPPENING??” -randomuser

“IS CORPSE OKAY?” -ShinigamiEyes

“CORPSE??” -corpsekkuno28

“BABY?????” -honestlywtf

“HE’S SO SWEET OMGOMGOMGOMG!!!!!!!” -cutiepiecorpsey

“WAIT WAIT WAIT IS HE OKAY????” -omgilovehim

“WHO THE HECK??” -wifeyyyycorpse

Both parties were staring wide eyed at the screens. Even with slow mode on, the chat was going a hundred miles per hour and all they were seeing were screaming chats in all caps zooming up. 

For a second Y/n just kept staring quietly, and then the first giggle escaped her and soon, both of them were a giggling pile of sweaters and limbs on Corpse’s computer chair, not even trying to stop their antics. Rae screamed another “YOU’RE BOTH CUTE AND WE ALL KNOW IT STOP AND SLEEP!!” 

The laughter seemed endless. 

It was the sound of Y/n’s phone ringing from the other room that finally got her up from the warm confines of Corpse’s lap. But before she left, she was going to make sure that Corpse was not just going to continue streaming in her absence. 

“Sooo….” Y/n turned them over so that she was facing the screen and not him, talking directly into the mic as she scrambled for the headphones she had shoved off of his head. “Yes Corpse Husband has a Corpse wife and she’s now taking him back to their coffins because the hubby is a stubborn piece of shit and has not slept in more than 50 hours.” 

The casual information drop made the chat go even crazier, people now freaking out about her, trying to find out who she was, what she did, when and where they met, stuff like that. “I’ll see what I can do to answer your questions, you simps. But I gotta knock him out for now, and I promise you won’t be left hanging.” 

She felt him wrap his arms around her waist once more, feeling him press his face tightly against her back. “Baby,” he started to say, but Y/n cut him off with a few pats to wherever she could reach behind her.

“Sorry, but the jackass is now cut off from the mic and shall be cut off until he sleeps, so I shall be the one to say, good day to you sirs and madams, he shall see you on the next one! Bye!!!!” 

Then a pause, and a quietly frustrated “Hun, how do you turn it off??”

The chat was flooded with variations of “She’s so cute!!” and as tempted as he was to keep it going for a bit, he knew that it would upset and worry his adorable girlfriend to do so. 

So from his vantage point, he just mumbled a quick “Bye!” before cutting off stream. Normally, he would stay and read superchats and see how many new members he had gained, but this time, his tiny, but determined girlfriend was dead set on getting him to chill his ass out. 

And he let you.

He watched as you dragged him off to bed, tucking him in all the fluffy blankets you’d gotten for his comfort, smiled as you eagerly burrowed yourself under the fluff with him, sighed contentedly as your warmth surrounded him as you cuddled into him. 

He basked in your presence as he held you back just as tight, feeling you plant a kiss in his hair and smile as he relaxed ever more. From across the room, the mirror reflected the image of the two of you, touching the deepest recesses of the soul he would never claim to have. 

And as he drifted off, he watched as you glowed in the streaks of the fading afternoon sun, peeking through their heavy curtains, he thought:

What more was there to ask for? 

[0littlestwolf0]

All that matters

Yandere! Percy Jackson

Ship: Yan!Percy Jackson x innocent/fragile reader

Warnings: Violence, over use of powers.

Requested by: @xxscreamingcolorxx

It started off innocently enough. Way too innocent for that matter, maybe that’s what ignited him.

You were just the new kid in the big apple, someone who just moved there because of your parent’s job, and like any teen would have, your mind started wandering off, imaginating all the possibilities, all the movies that could come true before your eyes!

As for him, it was just another year in yet the same school (something he was really grateful for), only the first day and he was already counting the days until he could return to camp, to his friends.

Annabeth.

The name stung him like a bee, scratch it, it felt more like an angry wasp, but he ignored it, she was the closest person he had, who could actually understand him, and hey, he did love her, maybe not in the way she did him but for all he knew that was it for everyone, maybe that’s why people say that friends end up falling in love, more like a ‘next step’ thing than actual love.

Was that even real though? He surely didn’t know, but he was comfortable with what he had, and that was good enough, so he tried to shrug the thoughts away and finished getting ready for his day.

Soon enough he was already in his seat, headphones blasting a playlist he had spent the night downloading from questionable websites, and his head between his hands, doing everything in his willpower not to start a mess.

Naturally he didn’t notice someone new entering the classroom, he tried to stay away from most others, and people didn’t really like him either, much of a troublemaker, they’d say.

His lack of social skills made sure you got a seat on your first day. But he didn’t look up as you seated, his senses did however, perk up at your perfume, some wildflower and another thing he couldn’t quite pinpoint, but it reminded him of camp, so he couldn’t help inhaling even deeper, he made the silent decision to start sitting near you.

And it could have been that way, you being your a scent he liked, just another person, but the fates had other plans, as did the first teacher, who didn’t waste a second on explaining the week project to be done in pairs.

His music was gone at this point, and he sighed, he didn’t like working on teams for school. Better yet, he didn’t like ending up with whoever else didn’t have a partner. Just then he felt a finger poking his arm, with a raised brow he turned to see you.

And your breath got stuck in your throat, he was probably one of the cutest boys you had ever seen, yet, his resting face (or so you hoped it was his resting face) looked just a combination between angry and dangerous. But you didn’t listen to your gut and talked “Would- uh... Sorry! I’m new and I was wondering if you’d like to partner up?”

Your voice had to be the sweetest thing, he was already starting to take a liking to you. You see, he isn’t the type of yandere to just get obsessed, it was your scent that drew him to you, yet, your willingness to spend time with him did make him feel better.

“Are you- Yeah, sure” he had to stop himself from pointing you to another person without a partner, not yet believing you’d want to partner up with him. But your enthusiasm changed his mind.

—

Before any of you knew, the day was over and you were waiting for him on your designated spot just outside the school, it didn’t take him long to reach you.

You saw his expression change as he crossed the glass doors, first a schooled glance to the floor, not allowing himself to even look at anybody else, you didn’t understand that, he didn’t look that strong but when you touched his arm you did feel hard muscle, then, why would he avoid trouble so much?

He didn’t seem to see you at first, but he did, trust me on that, he was just afraid of you changing your mind and would very much rather if you just left than the direct confrontation, but he couldn’t understand why, why the idea of you turning your back of him turned him inside out.

But of course you didn’t, you approached him with the sweetest smile on your face and stood right in front of him “Hey!” He couldn’t hold a smile at your voice, you just sounded so eager “Should we go to the library?” Were you always this eager? No, that seemed impossible, maybe you were just happy to be with him, that certainly made his smile bigger

“Uh- I mean- Sure” he was nervous, which made him want to laugh his ass off, sure he could fight gods and monsters but send a pretty girl his way and he’d stutter “I mean, I was actually thinking we could do it on the park” he finally added, the park was a bit far, but if there were any monsters he’d be able to deflect them easily on an open place rather than a dead-quiet-library.

“Yeah! Sounds good to me!” You agreed with a sweet smile and allowed him to lead the way “Just help me with the whole getting back thing, I still don’t really know the city” he nodded eagerly, almost as much as you had before, it was an excuse to spend more time with you.

Now this didn’t concern him as cheating or misleading Annabeth, for he didn’t think you’d like him, you see, he doesn’t seem to find himself as someone most girls, especially girls like you, would feel attracted t him, so even if he felt the this growing killer bees on his stomach every time he saw you, nothing would ever happen.

You walked with him through numerous streets, he took advantage of your lack of knowledge and took you through the long path, he didn’t even notice that he’d done that at first, but you were just so engrossed on your retelling of that X-Men movie, that he wanted to hear you talk like that for hours, suddenly, you stopped, your head held down “I’m sorry, I just get a bit excited sometimes” that sobered him “No, no, it’s okay, please continue, I really want to know what happened to this Logan dude after that”

You blushed but tried to hide it with a laugh, still looking down “It’s okay, I know I can talk a lot, and it might be stressing” you added, it was your attempt to stop yourself from boring the first friend you made on that school, but it made his blood boil, people just didn’t understand you fucked up the world was, fighting every day against monsters, losing friends on the way, and how amazing it was to hear stories from someone like you, someone without the blood that he had in his hands.

“Well, I like it, and I really need more context, so the future isn’t the future then? He just changed it and that’s that?” He understood the story, but sometimes making an easy question was the easiest way to make others talk.

And you went on, you arrived to the park and sat on a desk with him, taking your supplies and started working on the project, you were open, and gave ideas, still never shut any of his, you asked for his opinion every step of the way and used almost every idea he had.

That made him feel warm, you were most likely the first person to trust his ideas and hear him without a scowl or a frown, he couldn’t understand how would anyone shut you down when you talked? Every time you looked down and scratched your arm he noticed you were stopping yourself from over sharing.

Why would anyone hurt you like that? He just wanted names, they didn’t deserve someone like you in their lives, not one bit, they deserved to suffer for making you ashamed of your words. It surprised him, really, that rage boiling inside him, and how soon it’d be gone as soon as you smiled back at him.

And then it happened, a manticore loose in the park, running around and tearing people apart, he saw the moment your instinct kicked in, you could see through the mist.

He took Riptide from his pocket and stood up, but you grabbed his arm and pulled him down, holding a finger to your lips “Don’t” was everything you said, and he gulped, maybe you did care about him a little, his mind started wandering, maybe you felt as connected to him as he did you, he wanted to nod and stay with you under the table, to keep you from danger, but the only way he knew was by killing it.

“Please” you pleased “it’s going to hurt you” he laughed humorlessly, “Not my first rodeo” was all he said as a smirk took over his mouth and winked your way, maybe he also wanted to show off a little.

It was weird, he had never wanted to show off before.

But oh well, the manticore was closing in as soon as it’s nostrils flared up with the demigod scent on him, he needed to stop thinking and start moving, natural talent and years of training in camp made it easy for him, more like a dance than a battle, not that he’d ever been good at dancing, but you get the idea.

A move to the left, an angry manticore to the right, sarcastic comment out about how bad the sun had treated the manticore’s skin and a “you should really get some moisturizer for that crack in your skin” and proceeded to stab it directly on the belly as the manticore jumped.

And he laughed, allowing the rest of adrenaline to leave him, after getting so worked up with thoughts of people hurting your feelings, killing something felt really good. Maybe too good.

He turned to look at you, and his stomach dropped, your throat was being held tightly, lifting you ever so slightly from the floor by an empusai, were monsters working together now?

Of course it would happen to him, out of all demigods in New York.

Now he realized, his blood hadn’t been boiling before, but it was now, burning his very skin from the inside, the empusai giggled and he gave a step closer, then you were struggling again “Now, now, one more move and your pet dies”

Pet? Oh now it was personal, he didn’t understand his blind rage, maybe by an outside point of view, you had reminded him of what light was, even with the ability to see monsters you saw the good in people, that much he realized from your speech about Magneto being just misunderstood.

Maybe you weren’t as innocent as he once thought but you still tried hard enough to make conversation with him, you even tried in your way to keep him safe, and now, everything he’d seen was good and worth saving was being threatened.

It didn’t took him a word, just a small move from his left hand to the side, and now it was the empusai’s blood that boiled, literally, she started crying, he didn’t stop, all the fluids in her body boiled now, and started moving inside her, desfigurating her, she screamed and let you go, he didn’t stop.

You ran to him and he threw Riptide to the ground, instantly feeling the (now lesser) weight of a pen settling on his pocket, with his now free arm he grabbed you by the showlders and held you to him.

“Don’t look” he warned, grabbing now your head and pulling it to his shoulder, one last move of his left hand to the right and the empusai’s blood chocked her to death, streaming down her ears, nostrils and eyes, her mouth forever set on a silent scream as she fell to her knees and finally turned into ichor.

Just then did he allow himself to fully hold you, his arms wrapped tightly around your as your heavy breath tickled the side of his neck, your arms wrapped just as tightly around his waist.

He realized with guilt that you were shaking, you were probably scared of him now “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry” he repeated in a whisper against your hair, unable to let you go.

“No” you shut him and separated your body from his by merely centimeters, his stomach dropped “I’m okay, you’re okay, that’s all that matters” you said grabbing his face, forcing his wandering eyes to stay still on yours “Survival of the fittest, right?” You joked and he allowed a worried breath to leave his body, you weren’t treating him like a freak.

He nodded and you hugged him again, just as tightly, he still felt you shiver every once in a while.

I’m okay, you’re okay, that’s all that matters,

I’m okay, you’re okay, that’s all that matters,

I’m okay, you’re okay, that’s all that matters.

He repeated in his head over and over like a mantra.

You were too good for this world, and if that evening showed him anything was that monsters were probably going to come for you at some point, and he wouldn’t let them get even a step close.

He promised himself then and there that no one would ever harm you, monster or otherwise. After all, the gods owed him, he could get his way this once.

[lifewithdavefarts]

DaveFarts - Episode 11 “VoiceFarting” [Episode List] Tim and Adam are hanging out on... Liscord, playing some stuff together, waiting for Dave to join them for a game. When Adam unexpectedly has to leave however, Dave decides to do some… microphone testing.

VoiceFarting

“I’m going in as a mage ‘cause you fuckers can’t cast for shit” I heard Adam say right into my ears.

This was one of our usual game nights. We’d voice chat on Liscord on our own server and all that stuff. Adam was being, for the lack of a better term, kind of bitchy, ‘cause he thinks as himself as the most skilled gamer around even though we’re always reviving his ass. In the end it’s all in good fun of course, but we’d all happily mute him during a match if we could.

“Yes, Adam. Have fun with the ‘easy mode’ character.” I said, deliberately baiting him.

“Listen here you little shit” he immediately blurted “I can accept that you’re gay but I’m not going to accept the fact that you’re a scrub.” he said, obviously joking, though he did take skills seriously during a match.

“Yeah yeah but I’m the one using the axe, fighting enemies face-to-face like a man.” I kept teasing him. “How’s going up there? Still casting light arrows from your safe space?” I cackled.

“Excuse me???” his icon lighting up, the audio clipping “Why don’t we check your stats instead? Too afraid of looking like the scrub you are??? I literally made no mistakes last time.”

“Of course you didn’t: the chance of making mistakes is like 0% when you stand still and far from the battle.”

There was a moment of silence, then I heard Adam’s breath into the mic “You know I know where you live, right?”

I laughed but before I could continue this very deep and mature battle of wits, we both heard the sound notifying us that our bud Dave joined the voice chat. Now, whenever Dave joins, we usually hear every sound except for his voice, so we were ready to have our ears busted because of the noi-

“Hey noobs!” Dave greeted us, with a voice that was instead crystal clear.

“What the hell” both me and Adam said, our avatars lighting up at the same time.

“I see you noticed that you can now hear my beautiful voice perfectly.” he bragged, and rightfully so.

Normally we could hear his PC’s fans, what was going on down the street, cars passing by, atoms crashing into each others… farts. But now it was just Dave with his now-soothing voice calling us names.

“Are you finished?” Adam said.

But there was no response from Dave.

“Did he finally die?” Adam continued.

I heard a faint sigh of relief from Dave and then he went “Yeah, now I’m finished.”

I kind of suspected what happened but I didn’t say a word.

“Wait. You didn’t hear a thing?” Dave asked, puzzled.

Both me and Adam shrugged as if he could see us, but then said that no, we didn’t.

My detective skills told me that my gassy straight bud ripped one of his classic loud farts, but the new microphone had that “background noise reduction” feature (which my friend seriously needed) so it didn’t register his ass-blast as the old one usually did, so much so that Dave’s frequent farts would eventually turn into white noise for the rest of us. But now, his new headset was actually worth the price and all we could hear was indeed his voice.

“Can we just get into the game befo-“ Adam blurted, but was cut off mid-sentence by a loud, ear-piercing sound coming from Dave, though that wasn’t him speaking or screaming.

My fartbro really didn’t want us to miss what his ass is capable of, so we were both startled by a powerful, audio-clipping fart that completely overwhelmed our voice begging him to stop. And he did stop, but only after like 12 seconds. The rip was followed by the sound of Dave re-adjusting his microphone and laughing. “Hopefully you heard that now.” he chuckled.

I did hear it. I was very familiar with it. Truth is that Dave farting during our game sessions wasn’t anything new however. Even I was used to it, though that did pitch a tent in my shorts. I started wondering whether Dave was in jeans, shorts or boxers. Probably the latter, and shirtless, given that it was a warm evening. I tried to not to let my usual simp-ness over my bro take over me but apparently it was already too late, as I didn’t even notice Adam begin pissed off about an unwanted phone call.

“I’m sorry guys, I gotta take this one.” he said, annoyed. “Do not wait for me. Cya tomorrow I guess.”

And logged off, another sound notifying us that he went into the terrible real world realm.

“Alone at last, bro.” Dave said, in a flirty tone, just as Adam left.

I laughed and mindlessly switched to a different, this time single-player game as we needed at least 3 guys to play, one of those brutal action games that I suck at but I have to beat.

Dave did the same, with a similar game, and we both started gaming on our own but keeping each other company, like we usually do, occasionally exchanging opinions on what we were playing and so on.

“It’s probably his ex-girlfriend” Dave said.

“Yeah. I figured.” I simply answered.

Adam wasn’t really talkative about his personal stuff like me or even Dave, so neither us really knew what was going on. But if our bud didn’t want us to know, not fully know at least, then we respect this decision.

After a couple of more minutes of silence, I heard some sounds coming from Dave. Not a fart, this time though.

“Did you say something?” I asked.

I heard some muffled noises and then Dave’s voice, lower than usual though “I’m just messing with the settings here. I feel like sometimes the volume gets messed up.” and he was right.

“Yeah the audio is kind of low now.” I warned him.

I heard some more noises (keyboard tapping, mouse clicking, etc.) and then I heard him speak again.

Or, to be more precise, he did make a sound with his mouth, though those weren’t words; a loud belch, actually, right into my ears. Dave was more of a farter, but he wasn’t new to wild, incredible burps. I honestly prefer the more disgusting butt explosion, but I still tip my hat at my bro being a masterful air-bender from both ends.

“Yes, I did hear that.” I said, anticipating his question.

He laughed. “Thank you.” he answered, belching both word with care.

A couples of minutes of silence followed, with just me and Dave occasionally chatting but overall trying to be focused on our respective games. My straight bro was however not done with the “testing”.

“Are you hearing this bro?” he suddenly asked, trying not to laugh.

“No…?” I was puzzled.

“Wait. Let me just…��

I heard Dave removing his headset and as it got farther away from his head, a familiar sound got louder and louder instead, until it became unbearable.

“Are you hearing this now?” he shouted, though I could heard him over that sound.

The sound of yet another loud blast of gas, so loud it was glitching the audio. It was long and proud, dry as some of his best rips, and it just wouldn’t stop. The boss I was fighting somehow felt how distracted I was and one-shotted me with a swipe of his flaming sword but I couldn’t even hear any in-game sound ‘cause my straight gassy bro was basically farting right into my ears, albeit indirectly.

I instinctively reached for the pitched tent between my legs as the fart kept going strong and loud, so loud in fact that I had to lower the volume ‘cause my hears were starting to hurt.

After a grand total of 18 seconds, I once again heard Dave putting his headphones back on his head, wondering whether they were radioactive or melting at this point, due to all that poisonous gas.

“I gotta say… the sound quality is pretty spot-on. What headset are you using?” I joked.

Dave chuckled. “The same as yours actually. Thanks for the advice.”

We kept chatting a bit more as if he wasn’t a gassy teasing bastard but since he *is* a gassy teasing bastard I once again heard him, with no warning nor request from me, removing his headphones again and putting them (I assume) closer to the source of his underwear-clad ass.

Unsurprisingly, yet another manly, loud rip blasted through my own headphones right into my eardrums, renewing the hard-on I had only moments before. It sounded like a motorcycle passing by and I could only imagine how badly the stench was in Dave’s room. Lasting around 11 seconds, this time it got dangerously wet-ish towards the end, which I found hilarious but also made me rightfully worried about my bro maybe going a bit too far even for both of our standards.

“Dude.” I said, laughing a bit “You might want to go easy. That sounded risky.”

Dave, being the chill guy he is, just laughed about it. “Don’t worry, dude. I’m an expert.” and he ripped a short toot that was so loud I could even hear it without the microphone going straight into his butt this time.

We then kept gaming a bit more on our own. Dying over and over to that same boss made me think about how chill Dave was being -as usual- about my kink. I mean don’t get me wrong he always farted a lot while voice chatting but this time it was different, as he was now aware of my fetish. And, as always, I really appreciated that, just as I appreciated yet another thunderous blast, one that actually startled me, making me lose YET AGAIN.

“FUCK!” I blurted.

As the fart kept going, Dave moved the microphone closer to his face (but I still could hear the fart going) just to laugh at my gaming skills, completely aware however that his farts were a huge distraction on its own. He then planted the microphone once again in front of his butt and the blast went loud and proud.

“It’s just too easy.” he then chuckled, after finishing ripping that monstrous fart.

It was. I had to pause the game for a couple of minutes to calm down, the tent between my legs going harder and harder. Was Dave aware of this part as well? Of course he was, but he didn’t care. It was just a game for him, and he was constantly proving me how much of a pro gamer he was.

I hope he never gets nerfed.

End of Episode 11

[imaginedisish]

Devil’s Advocate (Tenet) Neil x Reader

Chapter 1: Paper Planes

A/N: Hey guys!! Here is the first chapter of the fic, “Devil’s Advocate”!!! I’m excited about this, and writing it is getting me through a lot right now, so I hope you all enjoy it too! Here ya go :)

Summary: After a traumatic experience, you are forced back into the field with Neil, but the mission is personal and possibly too close for home for you to handle. Neil helps you through it, but you’re not sure if you can get the job done.

Warnings: Violence, guns, death, drowning, injuries, angst, cursing, and yes, luckily some fluff :)

Word Count: 4,405

The weight of your cold, dark black glock settles heavily into your right hand as you pick it up off the table to your left. You secure a pair of noise cancelling headphones around the top of your head. You load the gun and cock it. 

The headphones blast with music, helping you to concentrate on the man-shaped target in front of you.

Everyone’s a winner, we’re making our fame.

Bonafide hustler making my name.

 You extend your gun out in front of you as you shut your left eye tightly to aim. 

All I wanna do is…

BANG BANG BANG BANG 

And uh, and take your money. 

You lower the gun as the target pushes forward towards you. You can’t help but smile confidently as you look at the deep hole you made in center of the paper man. You reach to take it down, but a warm hand grabs onto your shoulder, squeezing you tightly, freezing you in place.

The hand twists your body slightly, just enough to make you turn around. You reach up to the top of your head and slip your off headphones, letting them rest around your neck. 

A charming, wild grin pulls at Neil’s lips as his gaze meets yours. “That was bloody incredible!” He shouts. There’s a bright flash of excitement in his eyes. His hands gesture towards the hole you made in the wall. You had aimed perfectly, shooting in the exact same spot each time you pulled the trigger. 

“Thanks,” You say back as your cheeks flush with heat despite the boost of confidence rushing through your veins from Neil’s praise. A compliment from Neil means a lot to you, even though you’ve known him for years. He was your closest friend and made sure to tell you the truth, even when it hurt. That honesty grounded you in the chaos of your life. He was a constant, a steadfast star in your sky. 

Neil chuckles a bit as his eyes look down to the headphones hanging around your neck. You don’t hear how loud your music still is. Your mind is too focused on the sound of Neil’s laugh. 

M.I.A Third World Democracy

Yeah I got more records than the KGB

So uh, no funny business!

“A bit loud, isn’t it?” Neil laughs again as he steps closer to you. He brings his hands to the back of your neck, his fingers brushing lightly against your skin as he grabs the headphones and slips them off of you. 

That smile, You think before mentally slapping yourself across the face. Snap the fuck out of it. 

Your feelings for him were always at the back of your throat, clawing for supremacy, climbing up to the tip of your tongue, threatening to force your mouth open to spill your guts. Somehow, even after all these years, you were able to hold back. Maybe it was because you didn’t need more than what you had with him. That was an absolute lie. Maybe it was because he never belonged to anyone else. There was no need to be jealous. Maybe it was because there was a certain, silent promise of belonging to each other despite the lack of an official relationship.

That was more like it. 

Neil puts the headphones back on the table as the next song plays. The absurdly loud riff of the guitar pulls you back into reality. 

Fell in love with a girl,

I fell in love once and I almost completely.

She’s in love with the world

But sometimes these feelings can be so misleading. 

Blushing again, you reach into your pocket and pull out your phone to press the pause button. The music stops and you smile shyly. A creeping sense of embarrassment crawls into your stomach. You were beyond happy that Neil was able to see you in your element, and usually his presence made you feel good, but his attention was overwhelming at times. Now, the confidence that settled in before had been sucked from your soul and replaced with a racing heart and a cluttered mind. 

You push thoughts of Neil to the back of your head. “So what’s up?” You ask, setting the gun on the table next to your headphones. You casually slip your hands into the pockets of your baggy jeans. You mentally acknowledge that you may be overdoing the whole ‘playing it cool’ thing in front of Neil, possibly even to the point that he might be able to see straight through your act. 

“Well,” Neil pauses. His hand moves to the back of his neck. “I’ve got some news,” Neil says finally, his smirk falling from his lips. Your heart skips a beat. He looks unbelievably nervous. His brows furrow cautiously, knowing his next words are going to achieve some sort of poor reaction from you. 

You gulp anxiously and nod. “W-what is it?” You stutter as you predict the words Neil is about to say. 

I can’t fucking do this, not yet. 

Neil steps closer to you and grabs your hand in his. The touch was familiar but still shocked you to your very core, your nerves tingly frantically under his fingers. 

Please don’t say it, please don’t fucking say it. 

Neil’s voice is quiet in anticipation of your panic. “The boss, he wants you back in the field…” Neil trails off, continuing on about something in London, something about him going with you. You feel your chest tightening. You’re not listening anymore. You’re too focused on what happened last time, too focused on the trauma, too focused on the tears, the shouts, the deaths. 

“NO!” You scream, your long, HDM hung heavily in your hand. The lifeless body of a new recruit crashes to the floor. 

You raise up your arm and cock the gun. You’re ready to aim and shoot, but two large men grab your hands. Your gun falls to the ground with a clatter. 

The man with the dark hair cackles cacophonously. He shakes his head, his piercing emerald eyes dissolving your soul as he picks a new body to hold roughly in his arms. A revolver presses tightly against the person’s head. You can’t tell exactly who it is, as there’s a burlap sack covering their face. There are 8 other people in a semi circle, each appearing the same as the last, tied up in a chair with a burlap sack hiding their identity. 

“What?” He shouted barbarically, his voice echoing against the silver, metal walls of the chamber. “You think your fucking screams can get you out of this?” He grinned maliciously, licking his lips as he cocked the gun. Tears roll down your cheeks. 

You are helpless. 

You are useless.

“(Y/N),” The voice of the person cries out, knowing that their fate is already sealed. It was a woman’s voice, and you felt a bit guilty as you prayed to God that it wasn’t Wheeler.

BANG! 

The lifeless body slumps into the chair. You whimper, stifling a sob in the back of your throat. 

The man with the dark hair moves onto his next victim. You struggle, trying to shake off the two men holding you back. You look around the room, searching for something, anything to get you out of this. 

The man’s face lights up with malignant excitement, sensing that his next kill would hurt you the most. 

Fuck, no no no no no, You think to yourself. You could recognize those stupid, posh little black dress shoes anywhere. You knew the curves of his body, the shape of his hands. Blood dripped down his neck from the cut on his forehead he had gotten earlier. 

Neil.

“Please,” You beg. “Don’t touch him. Just kill me instead.” 

The man with the dark hair only grins more widely now. “Darling,” He snarls. You cringe at his use of the nickname. Neil usually was the one to call you that. “Your begging only makes this more fun for me. In fact, it makes me want to kill you even less, just so you have to live with the image of everyone you care for dying in front of your very eyes for the rest of your life.” His cold words send shivers down your spine. 

He maneuvers differently around Neil, as he grabs the bottom of the burlap sack and removes it from his face. 

Neil’s blue gaze meets yours. You heart feels like it’s being stepped on as it sinks deeply to the bottom of your chest. You can barely breathe now. You huff, trying to keep your sanity, trying to find a way out of this fucking mess. 

“I figured you would want to watch the life drain from his pretty little face, (Y/N),” The man retorts. You shake your head violently. You look left to right, searching for some sort of weakness in the two large men that were keeping you in place. You notice a brace around the knee of the man on your right. 

Thank God for shorts, You think to yourself. 

The man with the dark hair raises the revolver to Neil’s right temple. 

“(Y/N),” Neil mutters. “I l-,”

Before Neil can get his last words out, you raise your right leg, bending it in and snapping it out at the back of the man’s knees, launching him forward. With your right hand now free, you sucker punch the man to your left square in the nose. You round house him in the stomach, sending him backwards. You grab your gun off the floor and aim it back to the man with the dark hair. 

The man chuckles evilly. “You shoot me, and I shoot him. It’s really as simple as that.” Your heart pounds in your chest. 

An idea suddenly dawns upon you. You shift subtly enough so that the man doesn’t catch on to your train of thought. The gun is already cocked, all you need to do is pull the trigger.

BANG! 

“Fuck!” The man cries out, stumbling forwards into the center of the semi circle as he releases Neil from his grasp. His gun falls to the floor. You turn away sharply at the realization that you blew his hand off. 

You run over to Neil first, quickly untying his hands and setting him free. He starts untying everyone else and you walk over the the man with the dark hair. You catch a quick glimpse of Wheeler, and sigh in relief that she’s safe. 

You breathe in hard and part your lips. “Don’t you dare ever fuck with me or my team again,” You pause, kicking the man in your ribs. There’s something extremely personal about your tone.  He grunts in response. “Now tell me where Edgar is keeping the weapons. And tell me where the fuck the lab is, you prick.” 

He chuckles, breathing shallowly. “Prick?” He pronounces the word articulately. “That’s no way to address your uncle.”

“Fucking answer my question ass hat!” You shout, aiming your gun at his head. With another swift kick to the stomach, he curls up in a ball, clutching at his core. You cock your gun again, ready to shoot. Neil rushes to your side, giving you a look that implored you to let him finish before you blew his brains out. 

“F-fine,” He stutters. “It’s in London.” He gives you a set of coordinates, and Neil takes them down. “I suppose I should tell your father that you’re calling him by his first name now, hm?” 

“No, you won’t be getting the chance to,” You say. 

You pull the trigger. 

BANG!

You hear someone in the distance calling your name. 

Two slender, toned arms wrap around your back, resting on your waist as they pull you into an embrace. The smell of Neil’s musky, cinnamon and citrus cologne heightens your senses and brings you back down to Earth. 

Your breathing slows down a good deal as you press your face into Neil’s chest. His right hand comes up to the nape of your neck, and he begins to rake his long fingers through your hair. 

“Are you alright, (Y/N)?” Neil whispers in your ear. 

You swallow roughly. “No,” You say without even needing to think. “I’m not ready yet. I can’t leave Headquarters yet. I’m just not ready.” You feel tears begin to swell in your eyes and you bite down on your lip, hoping to keep them at bay. It had only been a month since you had killed your own uncle. He was a piece of shit, but that didn’t make the situation much easier to deal with. 

It had only been a week since you watched two of your friends die. That part may have been the hardest for you to swallow. 

Neil shakes his head and breaks away from you bit, just enough to get a good look at you. “You’re ready, (Y/N).” His voice is calm and reassuring. “And unfortunately, you don’t have a choice. We have to leave for the airport in,” Neil pauses, checking his silver watch, “45 minutes.” 

“W-what?” You gasp. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” 

“I just found out a few minutes ago,” Neil admits. “If I knew earlier, I would’ve told you.”

You nod, believing him entirely. “So we’re going to London? To the coordinates?” You ask, looking up into Neil’s ocean eyes. You could feel yourself beginning to drown in them, just as you always were. 

Neil simply nods back. He rests a hand on the center of your chest, feeling your heartbeat quicken with anxiety. “It’s just going to be you and I for a few days, and then everyone else will join when we confront…” He doesn’t same his name. He doesn’t want to make you panic again. But you know exactly who he means. 

Your father. Your heart hammers in your chest at the thought of him. 

“It’ll be okay,” Neil’s comforting tone relaxes you a bit. “I won’t leave your side for a second,” He adds. You sigh audibly in relief. 

You let a single tear slide down your cheek. “Thank you,” You whisper. 

Neil pulls you into his chest again. “Anything for you,” Neil responds. You shudder at his words. Sometimes you could swear that he didn’t only see you as his best friend, but something more. 

You let the ideas ruminate and run freely in your mind for a few seconds before shooing them away like pesky little children. 

You take a step back, allowing a small space to fill between the two of you. “I guess I should go pack now.” 

Neil instinctively closes the gap again. You can tell  that he’s worried you’ll break down, and you hate it, but his support feels nice. “Do you want me to go with you? I’ve been told I’m good company.” He grins and sends a wink in your direction.

The corner of your mouth turns up a bit into a half smile, and you let out a small giggle. He always had a way of making you smile, of making you feel good. 

“Nah,” You say, smiling fully now. “I’ll be alright by myself.”

Neil nods and smiles back. “Alright. I’ll meet you in the lobby at two o’clock,” Neil says. His smile turns into a smug smirk, and he turns his back to you. His dress shoes tap against the floor as he walks away. 

“Make sure to bring that silk pajama set you wore that time we went undercover in Monte Carlo,” He calls finally, wagging his pointer finger in the air. “I liked it.” 

You felt heat rising in your cheeks at his words. You almost tripped over the completely flat ground as Neil’s chuckle echoed down the hallway. 

————

You clutched the handle of your suitcase in your hands. You let it dangle in front of your legs, nervously bouncing it with your knees every few seconds. Your eyes searched the lobby for a head of fluffy blonde hair, but it was nowhere to be seen. You glance up to the analog clock above the front door. 

1:59. You were early. You were always early, for everything. Being late made you too anxious. You never wanted to miss a beat. 

The clock ticked 45 more times, and you counted each second. Finally, the sound of dress shoes echoed from down the hall. You looked past the reception desk to see Neil carrying a leather duffle bag in his right hand, and a bottle of water in his left. 

He smiled, releasing your butterflies from their cage inside your stomach as he finally reached your side. You open your mouth to say something, but Neil cuts you off.

“Don’t try to tell me I’m late,” Neil remarks sardonically, his eyes drifting off of you and onto the analog clock. “You’re just always early.” His smirk tugs at your heart, and you can’t help but smirk back. 

“I wasn’t going to say you were late!” You playfully smack his arm with your hand. “I was just going to tell you to be earlier next time.” 

Neil grins and shakes his head. He brings his hand up to the small of your back and brushes lightly. Outside the front doors, underneath the awning, a sleek, jet black town car pulls up. You feel your breath hitch in your throat at the realization that it was time.

This was it. 

Neil looks to you. “Are you ready?” His voice is reserved, almost as if he was scared to ask the question in the first place. 

You nod once. “As ready as I’ll ever be, I guess.” You swallow your fear and let Neil guide you out the doors. He grabs your duffle bag out of your hand, and opens the already popped trunk, carefully placing the luggage inside. You go to open the door, but Neil beats you to it. 

“I can open doors you know,” You say sarcastically, glaring disapprovingly in his direction. 

Neil doesn’t seem to care. “A thank you would be nice, love,” Neil says, shooting a charming smile in your direction. His hand is still holding the door open for you. You step inside the car and look up at Neil. 

“Thank you Neil,” You say mockingly. Neil smiles slyly and closes the door. 

The car ride to the airport is relatively uneventful. Neil gave you the run down. He told you your cover, where you were staying, and the overall gist of the mission. 

“So we’re married?” You ask, making sure you had heard that part of the plan right and hadn’t dreamt it up from a fantasy.

Neil smiles and nods. “We’re newlyweds, traveling the world together one city at a time.”  There’s a whimsy in his voice, almost as if he’s telling a fairytale. You can’t help but chuckle a bit, despite the anxiety growing in your stomach. 

The car turns onto an exit ramp, and suddenly the airport is in plain sight. You shiver a bit, feeling the air around you growing colder and colder. You check the temperature gauge at the front of the car, and notice that he hasn’t changed at all. You wrap your arms around your chest, rubbing up and down along your body, hoping to warm up. 

Neil’s smile fades away as he furrows his brows in concern. He wraps his right arm around your shoulders. You jump at the sudden warmth. 

“Are you alright?” He asks as he brings his other arm up to wrap around you completely. 

Your anxiety is begging you to tell him no. “Yeah, I’ll be okay,” You lie. Neil doesn’t buy it, and rightfully so. 

Neil squeezes you tightly. “I know you’re not okay, you don’t need to lie to me,” He whispers. “I’m here for you, and I’m not going anywhere.” 

Your eyes begin to well up, and a single tear rolls down your cheek. “Alright,” You sigh, wiping the tear away. You sniffle a bit, trying to clear your head in the process. The car rolls to a stop. “I’m ready whenever you are,” You say, trying to seem more confident than you actually were. 

You open the door and slip out. The chaos of the outside of the airport takes you aback, despite the fact you had been in an airport millions of times before. Neil steps out behind you, and goes over to the trunk. He takes the luggage out and steps towards to you. You stare up at the massive building, petrified to enter. 

Neil ticks his tongue on the roof of his mouth. “There’s not much time, (Y/N). We have to go inside now,” He says, his gaze staring into the side of your head. You refuse to meet his eyes, you’re too focused on the building, the mission, the future. 

After a few seconds, you nod to Neil and walk into the airport. You and Neil only have one duffle bag each, and thus you could skip checking in any bags. He guides you over to security, which happened to be a breeze. 

A short walk later, you approach the gate. There was a line of people waiting to enter, and you and Neil shuffled to the back of it. A few minutes later, a nice steward scanned your ticket. 

“Alright Mr. and Mrs. Ryan, you’ll be in row 2, seats A and B. Have a nice flight,” He smiles, and gestures for you to enter the bridge to the plane. 

Your heartbeat quickens as you take small steps. “N-Neil,” You stutter as you reach to center of the bridge. “I can’t do this. I really can’t do this. I mean it. I-I’m sorry I just can’t.” Panic is heavy in your voice. It feels as though the walls are closing in on you. 

Neil puts the luggage down and brings you to the side of the bridge. He pushes strands of your hair out of your eyes. “It’s going to be okay,” Neil reassures. “You can do this. I’m said I’m not going anywhere, and I meant that.” 

Neil picks the luggage back up, and guides you through the entrance of the plane and to your seat. You hesitantly sit down, quickly placing your hand on the armrest, wondering if there’s still time for you to run out of the door and back to headquarters. To your dismay, you watch the doors of the plane begin to shut. Neil wasn’t kidding before when he said there wasn’t much time. 

He stores the luggage in the overhead compartment, and takes his place next to you. He notices that you’re still shaking, and he places his hand on top of yours and brushes your skin lightly with his thumb. 

A comfortable silence rests gently between you and Neil as his hand remains on top of yours. Sometimes words aren’t necessary. You can get the idea of what someone means by their actions alone.

A few moments later, the captain makes an announcement, followed by a series of other voices sharing information. You're too wrapped up in your thoughts to pay attention to anything they have to say. Before you know it, the plane begins to move down the tarmac. It gains speed, and suddenly, you feel yourself being lifted in the air.

You shiver again, the anxiety becoming too much to handle. You try to ease into your seat in an attempt to calm down, but to no avail. You’re petrified and uncomfortable, a terrible duo of emotions to be faced with simultaneously.

Suddenly, you feel Neil’s warm hand leave yours. You watch in confusion as he lifts the armrest up, tucking it in between the seats. He lifts his arm, and wraps it around your shoulder, just like he had done in the car, and so many countless times before. You accept the invitation willingly, and snuggle into his side. 

Minutes later, you’re fast asleep in Neil’s arms. 

———

An evil chuckle echoes against the concrete and spreads down to the grassy beach below. “There’s no saving him now, (Y/N)!” A man shouts from the top of an overpass. 

You look down and watch as a familiar figure waves their arms frantically underwater, trying to swim up to the surface, but they can’t. There’s a brick tied around each of their angles. Their dirty blonde hair floats freely in the water as they continue to sink to the bottom.

“N-Neil!” You shout, trying to step forward to dive in after him. But your stuck, tied against a chair, guarded by two large men. “Please, please stop this!”

The man laughs, ignoring your pleas. “This is what you get, (Y/N). You’re worthless, and you fucking know it. Don’t you ever forget it, darling.” 

You shake side to side. The chair tumbles over and you fall into the dark, black, cold water. Your nerves are shot by the shock of the frigidness, and you can’t move. 

“Neil!” You gargle, left to watch as he sinks to the bottom of the lake. “Neil!”

“(Y/N)?”

“Neil!”

“(Y/N)?” 

Your eyes shoot open and you practically jump out of your seat. Your seatbelt pushes you down, keeping held tightly. You’re trembling. You can’t breathe at all. 

“(Y/N),” Neil repeats. “It was just a nightmare, you’re okay.” He wraps his arms around you, bringing you tightly into his chest. 

You bury your face into his white shirt, sobbing softly. His right hand reaches up to the nape of your neck, his fingers gently combing through your hair. 

“I’m so sorry,” Neil whispers, his voice filled with kindness. “I’m so, so sorry, love.” 

You whimper into his chest as pain explodes in your heart. “What am I going to do?” You mutter. 

“Don’t worry about that,” Neil says, his kind tone persisting in each word he utters. “I’ve got you, it’ll be okay.”

It needed to be okay. You needed to be okay. You couldn’t risk any fuck ups, not this time. This was real. This was life or death. 

This was the end of the world. 

Or at least it could be. 

“I’m going to fucking kill him for what he’s done to you,” Neil states, the kindness in his voice is replaced with anger and frustration. “I’m going to kill Edgar, I swear.” 

You shake your head against his chest. “No…

“Leave that part up to me.”

>>> Chapter 2

[bluearson]

Dancing King in Quarantine

Warning: ‘Daddy’ mention once & Reader’s contact name for him is Daddy D The news played quietly in the background as breakfast cooked on the stove. You were getting ready to go out and buy more groceries before lockdown, slipping on a hoodie that threatened to drown you in its folds. At least it smelt just like your boyfriend. You shot Dabi a glance across the room, a grin plastered across your face ear to ear. There was something comforting about seeing the raven haired man impatiently holding a spatula as he watched over pancakes. “This fucking sucks.” he complained as he shuffled through a playlist looking for the perfect song.

“The song.. or cooking breakfast? You know I-” You reached over to snatch the spatula out of his hand. Dabi’s hand shot out and gripped your wrist firmly but not enough to hurt. “I said I was going to cook us breakfast today. Thank you for your offer to help though little mouse. I promise, Daddy has it covered. Let me take care of things.” He kissed your cheek and slapped your ass with his free hand. “Don’t worry about a thing, I wouldn’t burn down the house on purpose.” You traced a pattern onto his bare chest before pressing your hand firmly on his chest and giving him a kiss on the lips, “You sure you don’t want me to wait to eat breakfast with you?”  “Stop worryin’ bout me and get that cute ass in gear before all the good stuff is gone sweetheart. Breakfast will still be warm for you, I’ll have a fresh pot of coffee ready. Maybe even a warm bath if you’re back within the hour.” “Okay... I’ll text you when I’m on my way home.” With one final parting kiss you left the warm comfort of your apartment and made your way to the grocery store. You spent most of your time sending texts back and forth with Dabi asking if you had enough of something and then trying to explain what you were talking about when he couldn’t find it easily. To: Daddy D -I’m on my way home!  ( ˙꒳​˙ ) Read 2:15pm From: Daddy D -Plain, Blueberries or Chocolate chip? Read 2:17pm To: Daddy D -Surprise me! (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ -I’ll eat anything you make  („• ֊ •„) Read 2:17pm You struggled to get your key out when Dabi opened the door, he traded you a mug full of coffee for the bags in your hand. He offered you a small smile as he stepped aside and gestured for you to come in. The kitchen island counter was cleaned except for a plate of pancakes, eggs and a small bowl full of fruits. Dabi kissed your cheek again before taking the rest of your bags away from you.  You made yourself comfortable, staring down the man who made a pretty convincing double of your boyfriend. The pancakes were neither gooey nor almost burnt, the eggs were a perfect consistency and you swear you got a few whiffs of bacon. “Did you eat all the bacon, Dabs?” He froze in place for a moment, offering up no response for what felt like an eternity as the silence stretched on between the both of you. He shifted his glance from his task of putting away groceries for you to your face as if he was calculating what to say next. “No.” He pointed to the microwave, “I saved some for you.” You beamed as you sipped your coffee.  You thanked him for breakfast and showered him in compliments about how much better his cooking was getting. You swear you saw him even blushing as you paid your compliments. Together with your beloved you lazed around together on the couch for a cuddle-movie night session to forget about the state of the world outside the comfort of your home. “I’m boooooored” you bemoaned as you stretched out and sprawled across your boyfriends lap.  “What do you want me to do about it?” He asked, absent mindedly trailing a hand across your tummy and tracing patterns into your skin with a finger. He leaned down and peppered kisses along your jawline as he played with your hair. “Care to dance with me?” He whispered. Your dominant hand searched for his hand lacing your fingers together as you pressed a kiss into his backhand. You nodded solemnly, releasing the hand that you had momentarily captured to get up on your own. Dabi managed to swiftly scoop you up before you had the chance to stand up on your own though and rose up off the couch like you weighed no more than a bag of grapes to him. He gently set you down and smirked as he snatched your phone off the couch to surf through your collection of songs and queued up a bunch that he liked after connecting it to a portable speaker. He held his hand out as the first song began to play. It was a little slower than the usual upbeat music you were used to hearing him blasting through his headphones.  Together you glided across the living room, careful to mind the furniture and not cause one another to have a fresh set of bruises peppered along the others thighs from unremarkable circumstances. You both got lost to the rhyme and sway of the music together. The rasp of his laugh makes your heart swell, it’s almost musical to your ears. You took a seat as you watched him lose him himself to one of his favorite songs, singing along at the top of his lungs and god.. you loved every second of it. It sent flutterers throughout your core, to watch him become so comfortable with you. You sung along after the chorus repeated, joining him on the “dancefloor”.  After three more songs passed you both began rearranging furniture so that you had more room to dance. Dabi was ecstatic when you gave him the go ahead to play whatever he wanted. Proudly he belted the lyrics after the G note hit. Your eyes lit up as you realized what song it was.  Together you both got lost in the throws of the dramatics, pantomiming along to the lyrics, thrashing around, the occasional headbanging, and of course.. you’ve both had your fair share of rockstar moments. It was a night to remember. “If you were a rockstar would you write songs about me?” You asked tentatively as you nursed a warm cup of tea while Dabi made himself comfortable sprawled out on the floor.  “Uhh.. yeah?” He popped himself up on an elbow, “I’d write total bangers about you. The media would ask me who’s my muse and shit and I’ll tell em it’s all bout the MVP.” “Would you keep me your little secret if it meant you’d be more popular for not being publicly taken?” You mused as you took a long sip of your tea. “Do you have some sort of fantasy about me becoming a world famous rockstar you failed to tell me about?” He laid back down to stare up at the ceiling, “I dunno.. I don’t think I’d really care about being like.. you know popular just because of my looks.” He grimaced, “I’d want to be popular for my music, cause people like my sound and it resonates with them. If you didn’t mind the problems that could occur with being public about our relationship in that scenario.. I wouldn’t mind.”  “What if I made a recording of your laugh and sold copies of it? You know.. in this scenario.”  “If it’s made into a song I want a cut, if it’s just my laugh straight up I think that’s really weird but I hope it’s overpriced and limited edition so you know the super fans would be all over it.” “You didn’t even need time to think about it huh?” “If I can make money off just laughing I would. Sadly there’s not really a market for it considering the only people who hear me laugh well.. are my friends and you.” Taglist: @some-kindofgnome @humanitiesstrongestchicken

[hskrealm]

protection. (m)

pairing: jeon jungkook x reader (y’all i literally typed min yoongi instead of jungkook THIS IS NOT HIS STORY I CAN’T GET HIM OUT OF MY HEAD)

genre: smut, fluff

word count: 1.8k

warnings: it’s called protection but there is none lol, soft cuddly jk, thunderstorms, cockwarming, oral (f receiving), kind of domestic, just something sweet since all i write is intense fucking

summary: your boyfriend acts as your distraction during a thunderstorm.

notes: inspired by the thunderstorm that happened here two days ago, and an anon who asked for a soft nsfw one shot w/ jk.

“Oh, damn.”

You flinched as another lightning bolt struck the ground with so much intensity that it looked as if the sun were out for a few seconds.

You knew this particular bolt would bring some pretty heavy thunder with it, especially since it took about fifteen seconds for the actual sound to follow the lighting.

“It’s getting pretty bad out there, isn’t it?” Jungkook asked, flicking his eyes up past his phone to rake over your figure for a few moments.

“Yeah...” You confirmed wearily, feeling sick to your stomach as the rain began to fall harder outside.

It was cool in the house, the lights were flickering a bit, and a small amount of rain managed to get inside. The atmosphere was stuffy, and it felt like some sort of opening to a bad horror movie, which you were not here for.

For your boyfriend, though, this was a walk in the park. He didn’t mind stormy weather at all, and often preferred to fall asleep with the thunder blasting past the music in his headphones.

He twisted his lips up in a frown as you brought your knees up further into your chest, slowly enclosing them within your arms as you kept your gaze at the wall in front of you, occasionally taking a glance outside if you heard or saw something you really didn’t like.

“Why do you even bother looking out there if you know it’s going to scare you more?” Jungkook asked, setting his phone down on the arm of the couch as he relaxed his posture and spread his legs a bit.

“I’m not scared,” You immediately responded, cursing under your breath at the unexpected jolt your body did when the lights began to flicker again, “I just like to check to make sure I’m not gonna die.”

Jungkook snickered and shook his head at your defiance, although he found it adorable that you were afraid of a little bad weather.

He didn’t mind, though. It was during times like this he could pull you into his lap and throw his arms around you without your complaining about making him uncomfortable for sitting on him for a long period of time.

“Come on, baby.” He smiled a bit as you turned your head in his direction, patting his crotch area gently with one hand while beckoning you over with the pointer finger of the other.

You shook your head, and Jungkook raised an eyebrow. You said no to him often when he asked you to sit on his lap, but you always ended up there anyway. Either by your own will, or a small bit of coercing.

“Don’t wanna?” Jungkook asked simply, relaxing his posture against the couch and throwing his arms over the sides of it. You shook your head once more, and he nodded once.

“Alright. It’s your call.” He shrugged, closing his eyes with a pleased smile as the thunder began to come down so roughly that it caused a few objects in the room to shake.

You fiddled with your fingers and took another glance over at Jungkook, envying him for thriving off of moments like this.

Now that you thought about it, his lap was always warm and inviting, and would it really hurt for you to...keep him warm? That’s all you were doing. This was for him, not for you.

You cleared your throat with fake confidence, which immediately caught Jungkook’s attention. He opened his eyes and raised an eyebrow at you expectantly.

“You know what, since you asked me so nicely—“ A continuous string of thunder sounded for a few seconds, and you shot Jungkook a worried glance before the lights went out.

You shot up off of the couch immediately and ran toward your boyfriend, feeling around for his torso before you slowly sat yourself on top of him.

He laughed as you curled up into his chest, your body trembling as the small amount of heat that was in the room left as soon as the power cut.

“What was that about me asking so nicely?” Jungkook asked with a small hum, sitting upright so he could pull you further into him. The muscles of his arms did do an amazing job of keeping you calm, but you weren’t going to tell him that.

“Why do you live off of my fear?” You mumbled into his chest, your hands lightly pressed against his shoulders as he settled his arms around your waist.

“I don’t live off of your fear.” Jungkook’s voice cracked slightly toward the end of his sentence, and you shot your head up to look at him.

Although you had to squint to see it, you could make out the uncomfortable expression on his face as he swallowed thickly.

“This is why I don’t sit on your lap, Kook.” You sighed, wondering why he didn’t tell you he was uncomfortable. You placed your hands on either side of his thighs to pull yourself off of him, but he pulled you right back down, so harshly that it knocked the breath out of you momentarily.

“Sit there, and stay still.” He warned, but why would you listen to that?

You wiggled around a bit, as much as you could before Jungkook got a death grip on your hips. You couldn’t believe it when you felt the boner in his sweats pressing against your inner thigh.

“Please don’t tell me you’re hard right now.” You asked, tone monotonous as you stared blankly at him. He probably couldn’t see your face, but you were sure that your voice change would show your disappointment.

“How could I not be hard when a pretty girl is sitting on my lap?” You could almost hear the shrug in his voice. You lowered your head down into your hands and sighed heavily.

“You’re horny because I’m afraid?” You wanted to laugh a bit at the situation.

“So, you are afraid!” Jungkook quickly tried to switch the topic. You lifted your head.

“That’s not the point here.” He smirked. You’d probably roll your eyes if you could see it.

“I just made it the point.”

“Jungkook—“ He cut you off, holding you tight against his chest as he stood up, flinging you playfully onto the couch so you were lying on your back.

He pulled your (his) shirt up to reveal your breasts, nipples already hard due to the lack of warmth in the room.

He licked his lips and latched his mouth onto one of them, twisting the other between his thumb and pointer fingers gently.

You moaned, back arching off of the couch. You weren’t sure what you were expecting him to do when he picked you up, but it certainly wasn’t this.

He have your other nipple the same treatment with his tongue, biting gently at the sensitive little nub.

He placed a kiss between your breasts, moving his way down your upper body as he moved backward a bit to make room for himself between your legs.

He began to nip and lick at your thighs, and your legs began to shake as he breathed gently against your clothed core.

“I can-“ one kiss to your thigh, “-think of something-“ and another, “-that’ll distract you for a bit.” One final kiss, this time right over your pulsing cunt. You hissed.

“Starts with h, and ends with d.” Jungkook teased, hooking his fingers into the sides of your panties as he tugged then down your thighs slowly, not bothering to pull them off completely.

“Husband?” You joked, and Jungkook smiled against your pussy lips, the small action sending your stomach into a frenzy.

“Not quite. Good guess, but you’re about a month or two ahead of the game.” He kissed the hood of your clit gently, before wrapping his pretty lips around your bundle of nerves and sucking it gently into his mouth.

You moaned weakly, sliding your hands into his hair as he placed his large hands against your inner thighs, spreading you gently so he could enjoy more of you.

You and Jungkook talked of marriage often, but hearing him openly admit that he was planning to ask you to spend the rest of your days with him sometime soon made this entire experience all the more arousing.

You gasped as he replaced his tongue with his thumb, gently circling your clit with practice as he took a few licks toward your tight, wet hole.

Jungkook knew your body so well that he didn’t even need to see to make you a whining mess.

He delved his strong muscle inside of you, growling quietly against your cunt as you squeezed against his tongue.

He always played around a bit when he was given the pleasure of tasting you, and this time was no different. He’d flick his tongue wildly inside of your pussy, draining your body of every ounce of that delicious juice you had to offer him, or he could take it slow, and bring you to your peak steadily.

He opted to drive you to the brink of insanity today, so he fucked you open with his tongue while rubbing frenzied circles against your clit.

You were too quiet for his liking, so he slapped gently at your clit to bring you back to your senses.

“Feels so good,” You praised him with a small stutter, dropping your hands down to your sides. Jungkook quickly took them into his much larger ones, intertwining his fingers with yours as he pulled you closer toward your orgasm.

Your chest began to rise and fall rapidly as Jungkook brought his attention back to your aching clit, catching you by surprise as he began to switch between teasing the nub and collecting the sweetness that pooled at your entrance.

“Gonna cum, gonna cum soon,” You warned, and Jungkook smiled.

He began to trace patterns against your clit, your moans turning into pathetic whimpers as you teetered on the edge.

With one final graze of his teeth against your clit, you clamped your thighs around his head, and Jungkook gripped your hands tighter as he tasted your release on his tongue.

He stimulated you through your high, waiting until you released his head from between your legs before pulling away.

While you caught your breath, he tugged down his sweats and slid your panties down to your ankles, gently lifting your feet as he threw the ruined garment to the ground.

He sat down on the couch, reaching over to you to pull you up onto your knees.

“Come on, come sit on my cock.” He cooed, and you spread yourself over the tip of his length as he gripped your hips to control the pace at which you slid down onto him.

“Ride you?” You asked breathlessly, and he shook his head and pulled you into his chest, just as he did earlier. Your eyelids began to sag.

“Just sit, sweetheart.” You nodded, squinting once the lights began to flicker a few times before they turned on.

“Lights are back.” You mumbled sleepily. Jungkook laughed, and you smiled as you felt the vibration in your chest.

“I see.” He ran a hand up and down your back soothingly.

“I’m tired.” Jungkook hummed.

“Get some rest then.”

“Love you.” You were beginning to drift off, but not before you heard,

“I love you too.”

tag list! let me know if you want to be on it. (you could send me a message, an ask, or just comment under this fic)

@bitchyaus @dontaskshhhhh @taesluttt @1-in-abillion @designjet @peachy-bhun @patpus @koracynthia120 @safi4x @lcnycto @someonewhowannadielol @dreamingsmile @rinastylesworld @fan-ati--c @sincemalik @bts-bay-bee @cestlaviecia @jeonjungkookiiee @bunny-kix03

[fakeloveaskblog]

aw, sweet loceit in the evening sun. logan is actually super good at explaining healthy relationships and boundaries and stuff actually, i betcha he could recognize abuse no problem

…aye remy! REMY!! HAve you thought about going to that gay bar more often? who knows, maybe you'll encounter someone nice, make friends with like-minded people, hear some disco, the full nine yards. janus might be there, remus might be there. (just look around for the guy with the blue tie, he's a great guy, if he's not wearing it he'll look like he has that blue tie kinda energy! you could totally just get drunk and unload your grievances on him and i bet he won't even mind!)

(Mentions of U!Virgil but I say beforehand when that happens so those who don’t like U!Virgil can enjoy the rest of the fic up until then)

(Words: 4100)

Remy wiped away a tear while looking at your message. The cold light from their phone was the only thing brightening up the room. Virgil was sleeping beside them, his arm was laid around their waist.

"You just like tots gave me the greatest idea! I'm gonna invite Rem out to the bar! It's gonna the funnest thing like ever! Thanks girl!!"

--

2 days later Remus was dangerously close to eating the moss straight from the gay bar's wall. He had been left without supervision for over 15 minutes while he sat outside waiting for his friend to show up, what else was he supposed to do?!

"SSSSUUUP BABE!!!"

Remy came towards him as fast as they could. They had on a short leather skirt, a neon mesh crop top and a leather jacket over it.

They did a little turn "I just like felt a bit glamorous today!" 

Remus choked on his own spit "The world must be a dark place when you aren't feeling glamorous"

"Awwww babbbe"

He sent them a big grin. He'd just put on his usual oversized dysphoria hoodie and matching oversized (:O) sweatpants.

Remus' smile disappeared in an instant as he noticed dark bruises all around Remy's neck. Shades of purple and green collided against each other.

"Ehm did a vampire come and attack you last night? Seriously are you alri-"

"JUst a reminder that it will be loud in there" Remy interrupted.

"Oh. Right!"

He fumbled around in his bag after his headphones. After putting it and a chew necklace on he did a thumbs up. Remy took off their sunglasses and leaned down so they were face to face.

Their face was so close he could feel their breathe against his lips. They put the sunglasses onto him and sent him a soft smile.

“There’s like lots of bright lights too” They explained.

Remus’ heart fluttered. He didn’t understand why “T-thanks”

They moved their arm around his shoulders as they went into the bar. It was past 12 am so some of the daytime furniture had been moved to make place for a dancefloor. There was indeed lots of neon lights flickering all around the bar and fast pop music was blasting through the speakers.

It was hard to see any details of anyone around him so Remus quickly forgot about the bruise. In this lighting it just looked like a weird choker anyway.

A guy with a see through shirt bumped into Remus. He had top surgery scars. For a moment they looked at each other in the most knowing way. The stranger looked away and continued talking with whoever he was with.

Remus whole body seemed to vibrate. There were so many butterflies in his stomach it felt like he was going to puke, in a good way.

Remy sat him down on one of the tall barstools and slumped down right next to him “So whatcha gonna drink?”

“The squashed down organs of my enemies!!!” He shrugged “Soda?”

They burst out into laughter “What? You catholic or something? Not allowed to drink alcohol?”

He slumped in on himself and started fiddling with his necklace “I-I dunno-”

“No. No babe I was just like joking. Like a stupid bitch. It’s okay” They waved at the waiter “Your most alcoholic fruit mix and your finest coca cola please!”

Remus leaned in to whisper “With salt”

“With salt? Please!”

He kept vibrating like an overexcited weasel. After getting their drinks he kept tapping the glass to stim some of the happiness out.

“Honestly I’ve never been to a gay bar before. I’m digging it. Just like how I’m digging graves”

They playfully hit his shoulder “Then I’m tots gonna try my best to make this the  ultimate first gay bar experience! I can’t think of any other lil fucked up gremlin buddy I would wanna have by my side!”

"Muhahah!! I am officially assigned ultimate gremlin buddy-”

“Greetings” A voice suddenly came from behind them.

Both of them flinched away. Remy let out a short yell and Remus was close to throwing his drink in the person’s face when he saw it was just Logan.

He had on jeans and a black button up with the top button unbottoned. He had with him iced coffee from starbucks because he had to drive home later.

“LOGIE!!!” Remy threw their arms around his neck to pull him closer “Babe this is the Log-legend. Once he was like sooo drunk so when he like tried to kiss me puked on my shoes instead!”

Logan grimaced “I am still very sorry about that”

“Oh I already know him through Janus” Remus replied. 

“Oh my gawd babe” Remy looked between them all “So like we all know Janny?! Wig! Sad he isn’t here then”

Remus held up his cola “Cheers to J-anus!” The other two held up their glasses in agreement.

“Cheers”

“Cheerio!”

“He is very pretty and charming and cute” Logan dreamily sighed. He stopped himself from continuing to say compliments.

“Yeah” The other two sighed back in unison.

Logan sat down on a chair next to them. Remy looked around the bar before squinting at him “No Patty?”

He instantly started looking like a Very sad seal “Sadly my wife is away on a convention with her magical girl anime fanclub this whole week. I estimated that going to the bar would make me feel less lonely”

“You have a WIFe??? Like a real one???” Remus exclaimed, his eyeballs were close to popping out from surprise.

“Yes. This may be a controversial opinion but when I marry someone I prefer them to be physically real” He replied druly.

He got a smug grin on his lips “Does she peg you?”

“She does far more than just peg me”

“Nice!” His eyes went even wider “IS That a stim toy??!”

He pointed at the tangle Logan kept between his fingers “Correct. If I do not have something to relieve my focus onto I can easily go into senso- OH a chewie?”

Remus nodded while showing of his chew necklace. The two of them started rambling about their favorite stim toy. Until they went off into special interests (star trek/astronomy and art/animal biology respectively).

Soon enough Remus was showing pictures of the animal bones he’d found. Logan ooeh and ahhed at all of them before asking the most nerdy of questions (where he’d found them, their bone density, if any damage had been done to them) which only made Rem infodump which made Lo infodump which made them both happy stim.

Meanwhile Remy sat beside them completely zoned out. They got time to drink 2 more of those fruit mixes and a few shots. The room was starting to spin.

The loud music wasn’t keeping out the yelling. They dunked their forehead against the bar table and covered their ears to try and get it out. The music was supposed to keep it out! Why was nothing working! The bruise ached. Their throat closed in on itself until they couldn’t breathe. 

“Remus” They gasped out. They looked over to their friend with a desperate look in their eyes. They just needed a distraction.

“So my theory for why you keep finding bones in specifically that part of the woods is because of the kind of dirt making it take longer for them to deco-” Logan was explaining while Remus nodded along.

“Rem! L-let’s like go up and dance or something. Please” 

This time it caught Remus’ attention. He looked over to them “Sure- are you feeling alright? Did you drink too much? You’re looking like a mummy”

“Yes. No. I just like- Like- They’re playing Charli xcx of course we gotta like dance!!”

“I will protect your belongings then” Logan added.

Remy stumbled up on shaky legs. Remus sent them a warm smile that made them want to cry before taking their hand. He let them lead him out to the dancefloor. Honestly he was pretty nervous about it, but being with them always made some of the anxiety melt away.

They stumbled on their own feet and fell forward. Their friend took ahold of their wrists and pulled them close to his chest. Their faces were so close to each other. So so close.

He didn’t let go. They couldn't remember him ever letting them hold him this close. Their chests pressed against each other. Their arms around his shoulders. His hands on their back. 

"You’re right. It is a good song. Good to crash a car too" Remus said absentmindedly.

Remy let up into shaky giggles from how sudden he’d said it “Yeah. Yeah I guess” 

They kept giggling. He chuckled back. He started spinning around on the dancefloor. They moved with him. His arms wrapped closer around their waist. Their cheek leaned against the slope of his neck (even though they had to lean down to get on his height level).

Remy quietly sang along to the music which made Remus start yelling along to it. The enby threw their head back from laughter. They took his hand and intertwined their fingers.

Remus moved his hand out and spun them around before pulling them close again. Their cheeks were flushed red, his was as well. He playfully dipped them down when the song ended.

It continued on into a song neither of them knew but they kept dancing anyway. They didn’t stay as pressed close to each other but they always had some contact. Holding hands. An arm around a waist. A head leaning against a chest.

When they finally got back to the bar table they were both panting. Remy was completely leaning on Remus since their body had started to hurt, but even through the pain they were both bubbling over with so much happiness they kept breaking out into bouts of giggling.

To their surprise Logan wasn’t sitting alone. A tall person with long dark hair sat on the chair beside him. Xir hand was on his thigh. The nerd had a soft smile on his face as they leant close to talk.

“Uh Lo?” Remus had to wave his arms around to get his attention.

His head shot around to look at them “Hello” He glanced to the person “These are the ones I was protecting belongings for” He stood up and held out his hand “Shall we?” Xir took it. Logan waved at his friends before going off to the dancefloor with the stranger.

“Huh. Good for him” 

“I guess”

Remy ordered another high alcohol fruit mix. Remus happily chewed on his necklace while humming along to the music. Between their chairs their hands hang with their fingers intertwined. Holding their hand had started to make Remus feel all funny in the head for some reason.

The enby watched on as Logan and the stranger danced for a bit before moving to a corner to make out. When the stranger started to lead him towards the bar’s bathrooms Remy turned to their friend.

“Yeah okay he’s not coming back for like a while. Smoke break?”

“Of course!”

They finished their drink before leaving the bar. The pair stopped right outside. Remus sat down on the side of the pavement. Remy tried to sit down but they stumbled over themself and fell flat on the ground.

Remus got up to help “Are you okay? Are you sure you haven’t drank too much?”

“I’m fine. I’m fine” They laughed out.

He sat them down on the pavement while dusting off their clothes. He patted them on the head while pouting “You should get some water”

“Naaaah babe. I’m good”

In the moonlight the bruise was visible again. That horrible dark purple bruise around their neck. It looked like it hurt.

Remus put his hand on their shoulder “Beanie are you alright? I do know it wasn’t some halloween monster that got you that bruise”

For a moment their whole body tensed, they forced a smile “It’s fine. me and my boyf just tried like some new kinky shit in the bedroom y��know. Nothing more” They lied.

They took out a cigarette pack and a lighter from their bag. They traced their thumb over Remus’ lower lip and opened his mouth just slightly. Remy leaned closer while putting a cigerette between his lips. They lit it.

Remus took a deep breathe. It’d been a while since he’d last smoked. He leaned so close the cigarette nearly touched Remy’s skin. They parced their lips as he breathed out the smoke right into their mouth.

A smile spread on their lips. He held the cigarette over to them but they shook their head. They looked around in their bag again and took out a small poppers bottle.

“Should you really take that. Won’t your brain melt out of your ears?” Remus asked “I really don’t wanna have to slorp up your brain juice...yet”

“Relax babe. It’s like not dangerous as long as I don’t like take too much and I only take when partying” It took a moment before they quietly added “And I only party when I need to get out of the apartement”

“What?”

They forced on a bigger smile “What?”

Remy moved the popper up to their nose and inhaled as much of it as they could. It took a few seconds before they let up into a giggle. It was in a higher tone than their usual bubbly laugh, it almost sounded like cackling. They could see stars.

(U!Virgil mentions from here on out)

“Y’know my boyfriend gave me like a flashback or whatever last night” They giggled while swaying from side to side.

Remus gently grabbed their shoulders and moved them to lean against him so they wouldn’t fall over “Uhu. Did you stab him?”

“No silly. He just. He’d been soooo sweet all weeek and I just I just ruined it ‘cause i like overeacted to some joke he made while like we were washing the dishes” They were barely even aware they were speaking “And like it just kept going until we were like screaming at each other”

Remy was still smiling and giggling between every word but tears started to form in their eyes. Their fingers felt numb. Bile was rising in their throat.

“And he just like threw the plate he was holding down on the ground. And it like didn’t hit me. He wasn’t even aiming at me. He was just throwing it at the ground. But it shattered and it was so stupid and overemotional and stupid and pathetic but I just I just curled up on the floor and like had a panic attack like a stupid baby”

They smeared their hand across their face to try and get the tears away. They felt sick. Remus quickly put out his cigarette, it didn’t feel like the right time to smoke.

“And I just like- Is that normal? Is that fine? Like throwing stutff like that? I-I- he’s never done it before. Or I mean like not plates” They looked up at Remus “Is it fine?”

He gulped while fiddling with his hoodie sleeve “Well uh did he apologize?”

“Mhmm. He like- like for some minutes he like kept yelling ‘cause he thought I was just like faking a panic attack to like I dunno manipulate him but then he like comforted me and like calmed me down and like held me and cuddled all night until I fell asleep and- and he said sorry a bunch of times and like he said it would never happen again. He uh usually doesn’t lie”

“Well ehm then it should be fine right? Right?” They both shrugged at each other “I mean everyone can make mistakes! And it was during an argument! Everyone does drastic things during an arguments! So it’s fine. I think”

A shaking breathe of relief left Remy’s lips. They stretched themself over his lap and he moved his arms around them. “Thanks babe. I was like tots worried for a bit but y’know i was thinking like that too. So it’s fine”

“Yeah” He combed his fingers through their hair “You do know you can vent to me whenever right? I promise I won’t gross you out with details about how to pull out rabbit teeth ever again so if I can hold that back then I can also listen to stuff! I can super listen!!”

They closed their eyes. They felt so tired. So tired and sick and horrible. “Mhm. I know babe. I know”

Remy sent him a soft smile before suddenly puking. Some of it came on his pants but mostly on the ground. Remus stood up and carefully moved them down to a sitting position.

He rubbed up and down their back with one hand and held their hair back with his other. Their shoulders were shaking and they were taking in shallow breathes between every sudden throw up.

“It’s okay beanie-boo. Breathe. Breathe. You got all the time in the world. Until the sun blows up at least”

“I-I took- too much- too much” They slurred out before lurching forward again. It seemed to stop for now.

“I’m aware” He carefully wiped away some of the puke left around their mouth with his hoodie sleeve.

They leaned back against his chest. They closed their eyes and focused on breathing. He held them so so gently. As if they would break like glass otherwise. He pressed a kiss to the top of their head.

“There you are!” Logan said as came through the bar entrance “What a relief. I assumed you had left without me because you thought my actions were unacceptable” He noticed how pale and shaky Remy looked and got a worried look on his face “Is everything alright?”

“They feel like someone has slammed a fish into their stomach. Not good” Remus replied.

“I see. I suppose it woud be best to get them home”

Logan picked Remy up with ease to carry them to his car. He was quite sure he’d carried dogs that weighted more than them. Remus anxiously followed along.

He sat them in the passenger seat. He shook their shoulders until they opened their eyes. They let out a quiet whine.

He held up 4 fingers “Remy how many fingers am I holding up?”

“Fuck yourself”

“Noted”

They moved to the side and seemed to pass out again. Logan closed the door before turning to Remus.

“Did they take anything?” He whispered.

“Only a popper”

“Good. Do you need a ri-”

“Bus”

“Okay” Logan was about to go but stopped midstep and lowered his voice even more “Oh and Rem...Could you please not ask Janus to hang out next weekend? I am planning a surprise...I hope it will make him happy”

“Good luck comrade....Please text me once Remy is home safe. Please?”

“Of course”

He did a little nod before leaving. Logan got into the car. He couldn’t stop looking at the bruise around their neck. Remy continued to sleep for most of the ride until they they were 5 minutes or so away from their apartment. They suddenly flinched awake.

“Stop the car!” They gasped out. 

“Are you still feeling the same?”

“Logan stop the fucking car!” There was fear in their eyes. 

Logan stopped by the side of the road. The road was barren and dark. It had to be past 3 am at least. Remy crawled back into the backseats while their whole body shook.

“Don’t. Look. At. Me”

“Sure” He stared down into the steering wheel to not accidentally see their reflection in the glass.

“I just. I just have to change clothes. I just. I don’t want Virigl to call me a whore again. I mean. He won’t. But what if. What if he gets mad. I just. I just have to change” They slurred out.

They stumbled out of the car after changing into a pair of long pants and closing their leather jacket. A cold chill went up Logan’s spine. He quickly stepped out of the car as well.

“Okay bye bye Logie!!”

They tried to move but Logan grabbed onto their shoulders. He forced back a choking feeling in his throat “What do you mean by your boyfriend getting mad?”

“Pff! It’s nothing! I’m drunk!! Byyyeeeeee”

They started to stumble away but Logan easily followed along “It did not sound like he called you a whor-...you know what...with your consent. I am simply going to remind you that calling a partner things like that is not okay. Not in any circumstance”

Remy’s expression turned cold. They walked faster “I don’t like what you’re implying”

“I’m not implying anything”

“Yes you Fucking are!”

“Exscuse me for being worried about your wellbeing. What you just said sounded like a very bad sign”

“Yeah exactly it only SOUnded bad! My boyfriend isn’t bad!” Remy snarled out.

“I am not saying he is. He doesn’t have to be bad to say awful things, as long as he changes”

They shoved their hands into their pockets. Their hands moved into fists “You don’t know a fucking thing about me. You tried to kiss me once when you were drunk and that’s all. We don’t know each other”

Logan took a deep breathe “I don’t need to know you to see red flags. Remy-” He searched for words “Remy you’re bruised. How- you can’t expect me to not get worried”

Remy suddenly stopped and turned around to meet his eyes. “MY BOYFRIEND ISN’T ABUSIVE! I-”

“I’m not necessarily saying he is. I just wan’t to talk-” His voice started to sound desperate.

They looked like a cornered animal. Tears were brimming at the edges of their eyes “YOU DON’T KNOW A THING!”

“Remy-”

“I DID THIS TO MYSELF!” Their hand went up to the bruise “I DESERVED IT! VIRGIL DIDN’T DO A FUCKING THING! I DID! I TOOK A BELT AND HURT MYSELF! OKAY?! VIRGIL CARES ABOUT ME!”

He tried to sound soothing “Remy please take a deep breathe-”

“NO! NO! YOU KNOW WHAT LOGAN?! THERE IS STILL CUM ON YOUR FUCKING LIPS FROM YOU SUCKING OFF SOME STRANGER IN A DIRTY BATHROOM! SO NO! I AM NOT TAKING LOVE ADVICE FROM SOMEONE WHO IS CHEATING ON HIS GODDAMN WIFE!”

They stormed away. For a moment Logan was frozen in place before he forced himself to run after them to try and make sure they would be okay.

“I am not-”

Remy looked at him for one last time. The look in their eyes made him feel cold. It was pure hatred.

“Logan get the fuck away from me! I am drunk and high and alone on a street with no one but you who is sure as hell fucking stronger than me and all you’re doing is spouting bullshit! So please get why I want you to leave. And why I don’t ever want you to talk to me again!”

He stopped dead in his tracks “...Right....Yes....I am so sorry”

Remy didn’t even respond. They simply turned and walked away. Logan stayed and watched to make sure they got home to the apartment safe before going back to his car.

He slumped down in the seat. His heart was racing and his thoughts were for once an illogical flurry. He sat motionless for several minutes before finally getting some semblence of an idea.

He took out his phone and dialed one of his usual numbers. It took several signals before Emile Picani picked up.

“Mhm? Logie bear? I can’t today I have clients in the morning” He yawned out.

“This is about one of your patients. I am fearing that they are in danger”

In an instant all of the sleepyness in Emile’s voice disappeared “In danger? Physical? Is it urgent? Do I need to call someone? Which patient are you even referring to?”

Logan hesitated. If Remy had reacted that strongly to him just attempting to ask about his boyfriend it was very likely that they would stop going to therapy if Emile brought it up. His throat tightened, he didn’t want to put them in any more danger.

“I....Nevermind Emile....This was just a far too gone joke...Someone dared me to call you. I am sorry. Have a good night”

He ended the call. He leaned his forehead against the steering wheel and let out a long sigh. His hands held onto the wheel so hard his knuckles whitened.

Logan had no idea what to do. No idea at all. All he knew was fear. Fear for Remy’s safety. Fear for their well being. Fear that anything he did would only make their situation worse.

[ninnodesu]

“Can I See You?” ch 2 || Modern!Thomas

Well. People apprently wanted more of modern!Thomas, so naturally, my brain conjured up a continuation.  GUESS WE HAVE TWO LONG STORIES NOW, FRIENDOS

I AM GOING TO TAG EVERY CHAPTER OF THIS FIC AS CICU IN CASE YOU WANT TO BLOCK OR FOLLOW!

TWs: - Mentions of rape - Broken bone - Mentions of cannibalism - Mentions of murder - Murder

He could see in your eyes, how the tears welled up and streamed down your face that you’d recognize him and he left. He couldn’t look at you at this point, couldn’t look at you cry because of him. He heard you cry behind him as he turned to go into his basement bedroom, his heart stung in his chest as he heard you beg and scream in fear. Closing the bedroom door, he proceeds to lean up against it, back pressed hard to it, eyes shut closed. Some kind of desperate way to make your panicked begging go away.

I can't, I can't, I can't, his inner voice chant like a mantra. His anxiety gets the better of him and he starts pacing, the wood under his feet already marked with a worn-out pattern left by his heavy boots after years and years of anxious pacing. A fierce battle erupts in his mind.

- I can't kill her - You have to, and you know it - No, I won't - Come up with one good reason to fistfight the old man about this - He would die and I wouldn't have to do this fucking thing anymore - And what? You'll live happily ever after with this woman? - I… - She would never accept the truth

Returning to his original place with his back to the door, he slowly sinks down to sit on the floor, one leg sprawled in front of him, the other resting under it. He's lost, he doesn’t know what to do. If he lets you go, you'll go straight to the police. If he kills you, he'll never hear from you again, he'll never see your face again, a sudden wave of intense nausea hits him at the thought of keeping the skin of your face to make a new mask. No, no he can't do that.

This is the first time since he had to butcher his first human that he feels genuinely lost.

He's mad at his uncle for wasting the low amount of money they do have on ugly hookers and booze, having Thomas resort to this way of living. He never truly did want this. The first time Charlie, or Hoyt as he wants to be called now - although Thomas never really did care about his apparent name change and still called him by Charlie to piss on his ego - talked to him about this, he threw up minutes after being left alone.

He still remembers the first time he got forced into butchering a person, just like it was yesterday, even though it’s nearly four years ago.

That day, he was on his way home from work, ending the day with bashing his old boss’s head in with a sledgehammer. The old man had disrespected his family, something Thomas wouldn’t stand for. Knowing that the security cameras were already turned off, he swung the hammer out of anger. He was mad that they were closing the slaughterhouse and he was hurt by the words that had been spoken. No one disrespects his family and gets away with it. Killing his boss didn’t wake any regrets. He believed the old man deserved it. The afternoon sun was still blazing down at his already sweaty form, propping his headphones on his head, he turned the music on full blast and lumbered home with no care in the world.

His right hand carried a memento of his old work, the slaughterhouse’s chainsaw.

As he had come out from a few trees up on the gravel road, a police car was parked by the side of it, the harsh blue and red light blinking to get his attention. Figuring he was caught, he took the headphones off, letting them rest around his neck and stopped in the middle of the road. His hair blew in front of his face as he took heaving breaths, waiting for the piercing pain of a bullet.

Bang! Thud.

What greeted him instead of searing pain, was Charlie standing behind him, brandishing a shotgun and looking down at a police officer with the head blown off. Everything after that is a blur. Vague memories of Charlie talking to him about the plan, the body was laid out on an old table in the basement. He’d never seen this side of his uncle before, so he tuned out.  Words like “ do it”, “no money left”, “can’t afford”, “ butcher him ”, “don’t tell mama” and the worst sentence he’d heard in his life; “ you have to do this, Tommy. For the family. We need meat to survive, boy.” echoed in his mind.

A loud bang coming from outside woke him from his memories. When he just seconds later heard your voice in a shrill pitch, he almost jumped off the floor and hurried out only to see you laying on the floor with half the table over you, the other half leaning against the metallic sink.

Jesus christ…

Being left alone again, your thoughts start racing and your heart along with it.

Where did he go? Why is he here? Does he live here? Is he going to kill you? Rape you? Keep you as a hostage? Was that his family? What? Why? Where?

It’s quiet, but you hear a faint shuffling coming from somewhere close to you. All you can do is lay there and look up at the ceiling, and to your left or right.

On your left you see what looks like a workbench, an apron rests on a hook next to it. It looks well used, stained with a dark and muddy hue of red. There's a sink and dirty towels hanging off the edge of said sink. The sight to your right, however, makes your stomach flip and turn on itself. There’s cleavers, knives, hooks. Huge bins stained with the same red hue as the apron. Putting all the puzzle pieces together, your breathing increases, teetering on the edge of hyperventilating. Thomas, your Thomas. The Thomas you’ve gotten to know, the one you’ve missed for these two weeks, the one who made you all giggly when he sent you the first full-face selfie of himself… a murderer.

As the adrenaline starts shooting through your body, you try wiggling a bit to see how bolted down you are. Your fastenings are tight and they burn as you try pulling your hands out. The metal just digs into your skin resulting in nasty burns.

Fuck…

That’s when an idea - or rather a small glimpse of hope - blooms in your head. Hopefully, the table is not bolted down. It’s a stupid idea, and you know that if Thomas doesn’t kill you, the table most likely will. But rather the table, than the man you’ve slowly started to fall in love with during the months you’ve talked. Getting killed by Thomas’ hands would haunt you more in the afterlife than anything else.

Gathering all the remaining strength, you throw the entirety of your body not bolted down to the side, doing your best to ignore the burning in your wrists and ankles. The first attempt yielded nothing major, the table moved, yes, but not to the extent you wanted. So you do it again, this time, the table goes down, and you with it. You feel the bone in your leg crack before you feel the brutal pain that explodes through it.

Your scream is high to the point where you feel your vocal cords strain and your voice slowly becoming lower, raspier. The pain is enormous, the throbbing pain in your leg thrumming together with your rapid heart. But - thankfully - your scream summons movement, footsteps, and voices. The most prominent footsteps, heavy ones, belong to Thomas as he’s the first one to your side. Even if you can’t see him, you see his clunky boots and grayish jeans, at least you hope that’s Thomas and no one else. All you do is sob onto the floor, your tears pooling under your chin at the pain radiating from your leg… and the burns around your wrists. It takes a full minute before you see big fingers curling around the edge of the table, a grunt coming from above you before your vision starts flying. He was lifting the table up. A loud, hoarse cry escapes your dry throat as the table thuds back into place, jolting your broken leg.

You're about to scream again when your brain catches up to the cleavers and knives hanging to your right but quickly after the first raspy pitch leaves your throat, a hand clamps over your mouth. The rasping sound is muffled under the big hand and you can feel it moisten due to your breath, but all he does is put a finger to his lips in a shushing motion and plead with his eyes for you to stay quiet. Which you don’t, you rasp out a hoarse scream against his palm and keeps shooting daggers at him. My god, are you pissed right now.

Who the fuck are you, and what have done to the Thomas I know, you fucking animal!

You don’t quiet down until you hear that sliding door slide open again and an angry voice rings out. "Thomas! What the fuck is that racket?!"

Thomas jerks his head up as he hears Charlie's voice. He's not sure what to do, his uncle’s footsteps thud down the stairs and soon enough, Thomas sees him in full and exchanges eye contact. "This bitch is still alive? Why haven't you taken care of'er yet, ya idiot?".

Shit uh…

He glances down at your dagger filled eyes while trying to figure how to keep you quiet and talk to his uncle at the same time, needing both hands to do so. He can't sign to Charlie if his hand is clamped over your mouth. Letting out an annoyed grunt, he grabs the nearest towel and shoves it into your mouth as quickly and deep down he can without choking you, making sure you can’t spit it back out. Seeing you so shocked, and angry and… some other kind of emotion he couldn’t place, he got the urge to show you some kind of affection. Resulting in him patting your cheek, his huge hand basically engulfing half your face before walking over to the stairs.

"Well?", Charlie spits out his venomous words. Thomas' hands fidget a bit, nervousness taking a hold of him.

'I know her' The same signs that he kept on repeating earlier, annoyance building inside him knowing that his asshole of an uncle refuses to learn more. Making it almost impossible to have a normal conversation with him. "Listen, Tommy, I. Don’t. Care.", the looks between the men are like venom. "You were 'sposed to get to work on'er before mama gets home. You know damn well how much she hates when the cattle scream." Thomas really can’t help the smirk hiding beneath his mask when he hears that. He glances up the stairs before checking the time on his wristwatch before shrugging, pointing to it, and slowly signing two words he knows Charlie can decipher.

'Fifteen minutes'

That's when Charlie grabs the neck of Thomas' shirt and yanks him forward, the only reason he's able to is that he manages to catch him off guard. His breath reeks of alcohol. A clear cut sign that he’s drunk. "Listen here, you bastard. I've had enough of your defiance today. If you ", he stabs a finger in Thomas' chest at the last word, "don't take care of that girl, I will . And you know damn well I ain't going easy on'er." Charlie releases Thomas with a shove, making him stumble backward slightly. The final words from Charlie’s mouth before leaving the basement stings in Thomas’ heart. "I don't want to see your ugly ass upstairs until she's done for."

Thomas watches him leave and turn towards you, who’s still crying silently on the table.

His heart stings more and more the closer he shuffles to you. Sure, he had had nights where he dreamt that he would meet you. But not like this. Never like this, never here. He did not want to see you on his butcher's block. At the same time, he moves to remove the towel he makes the same shushing motion towards you, with the same pleading eyes as earlier. This time, she nods. And Thomas lets out a sigh of relief. As he removes it, you’re panting, breathing sounding almost more like wheezing squeaks. He goes to rinse the towel under some lukewarm water to pat clean the bloody gash over the eyebrow that got hit to knock you out before getting here. All the time, he feels a burning gaze on him, from eyes that are seemingly watching his every move.

You wince when the damped towel touches your eyebrow, a wound you didn't know you had greeted you with a sting, a small hiss leaving you. Your eyes are glued to the giant man, making sure you see his hands at all times. You want to speak, but your throat is dry and hoarse, figuring out that your earlier screaming has annoyed your vocal cords to a great extent. So all you do is watch him. He, on the other hand, is doing his best to avoid making eye contact with you. And it pisses you off, but at the same time, it relaxes you and makes your heart hurt.

Why the fuck are you avoiding me?!

The thought makes your eyebrows furrow. He’s seen you naked, yet can’t fucking look you in the eyes? You try thrashing a bit with your shoulders to try and get his eyes to yours, but to no avail. His tender way to clean your wound surprises you. This huge killer, this murderer, and straight-up deranged man are making sure not to hurt you, and you can't help but breathe out a laugh.

That's when he - apparently - seems happy with his cleaning and turns his back to you, he turns the water on and it sounds like he's rinsing something. Shutting the water off he moves out of your line of sight. A slight panic arises in your chest at the thought that he might have gone off to fetch whatever tool he seems fit to end your life.  You hear a rummaging sound close by, and then he's back above you, looking down at you. This time, you feel a large hand on your head as he slowly and carefully tilts your head back, your eyes are met with harsh light and you shut them. That overwhelming want and need for him to look into your own eyes die down. Now, you don't want to look at him when he slits your throat.

But he doesn't.

You hear what sounds like a paper wrapping open. Two fingers press on either side of the gash over your eyebrow, a small whimper escapes you at the pinching pain, and then something sticky is attached to you. A band-aid. He had put a bandaid on the cut of your eyebrow. It isn't until you feel his hand leave your head that you open your eyes. And at that moment, your eyes are met with his blue ones. The way he's looking at you makes a tiny bit of your anger and hurt, and fear goes away. His blue eyes are filled to the brim with hurt, and sadness, and confusion. It almost looks like he’s about to burst into tears. He looks broken down.

Thomas fiddles a bit with the paper wrapper of the bandaid after making sure it's secured on your eyebrow and proceeds to look down into your beautiful eyes, your eye color popping in the harsh light. Something in them reflects his own emotions. He doesn’t want this, he punishes himself for not responding to your text messages the past weeks, or that he didn’t reach out to you. What he’s looking at is clear cut torture for him. He wants to cry.

I'm so sorry…

He hears the familiar clacking of his mother's shoes above the both of you, a sigh of relief escapes him. Patting the pockets of his jeans, he makes sure he has his phone and the keys to the basement before he heads over to the stairs. But he stops right before ascending them and looks over to you.

He pulls his phone up, unlocks it swiftly, and goes to his text-to-speech app, making sure the volume is put on high before typing out two words and hitting the speech button. A male voice rings out through the basement.

"I'm sorry"

[everybodyscupoftea]

you are the music in me

rafe x reader

five times rafe shows you a song, and one time you show him

holy cow who let me do this:

okay huge thanks to @travisgermy​ who stayed up forever with me picking out songs one night, the list of “maybe this” or “idk does this fit the vibe” is insanely long but i think i got it right.

i’m very very proud of my playlists and my taste in music. music is also very important to me, so i decided to write this because if a man ever came to me and said “this song made me think of you,” i might marry him on the spot

finally, thanks to my two very good friends for encouraging me and reading it over @sunnypogue​ and @moldisgoodforyou​ you guys are the best

little warning: there’s some cursing

(also i tried to link the songs to the titles so you can click and listen while reading that part)

You met Rafe freshman year in an auditorium size Intro to Theater elective. He was giving off huge ‘don’t fuck with me’ vibes and sitting alone in the top left corner of the room, pretty far away from everyone else. Not only was the lack of people appealing, but the rumpled boy with headphones in, chugging coffee, was cute.

Orientation was scheduled late for you, and theater was the elective you opted to take when all the music classes were filled. Unfortunately, scheduling last meant most of the seats were full anyway, and you had no choice but take it at 8 a.m.

It was easy at first, barely any work involved and minimal notes. You basically just had to show up and fill a seat for attendance. And then the ‘acting’ unit started and your professor, who had been your favorite until then, threw a partner project and suddenly the ‘not talk to anyone’ strategy you’d been employing backfired.

Holding in a groan, you looked over the lines of dialogue he’d given out with the instructions, “Make it your own.” People all around you were moving and chatting with the people they’d talked to in class already and you felt frozen. Until headphone boy suddenly sat down next to you.

“Wanna partner up?” he asked after a long sip of coffee.

“Oh, um, yeah, that’d be great.”

Thus, the shaky alliance formed. He was a little closed off at first, but you managed to get to know him a little more, and by the end of the semester, you’d even call the two of you friends. It was really solidified when he texted you first a few times over winter break.

Rafe was really easy to talk to, he had his own amount of trauma that he didn’t really talk much about unless it related to an issue you were going through and he felt his experience could relate to yours and comfort you. It was really nice, having a support system away from home in this new college town where you didn’t know anyone.

Study sessions together turned to lunches together turned to dinners together. He became your permanent bar buddy and you always felt safe with his steady presence nearby. You’d never really known anyone quite like him and it was exhilarating being with him all the time.

Where Rafe really excelled was music. He constantly had headphones in when walking around campus, when the two of you studied, and when you went to the gym together. It didn’t bother you, it wasn’t rude, he just liked it and he knew so much about artists and bands you’d never heard of. It was how he best communicated.

One: Let Me Down Slowly

Fall of sophomore year, you started seeing a guy in your literature class. It wasn’t like a super romantic thing, it started with just sleeping together after a football game to occasional dinners when you weren’t with Rafe.

His name was Brian and Rafe hated him. Casual sex was hard for you, separating feelings and intimacy wasn’t your style, but for Brian you tried really hard. It failed, just like Rafe warned you it would, but you vowed to keep faking it anyway.

Eventually, Brian, during dinner, asked if you had been seeing anyone else. You hadn’t, of course, and told him so. He seemed pleased and you thought that meant he wasn’t either. Where you went wrong was not actually getting clarification on that point.

He invited you to a party one Friday night, and you decided to go. Rafe was in your dorm room, watching you get dressed, as you chattered on about finally being official with Brian and this being the two of you’s big moment as a couple finally.

Rafe sat cross-legged on your bed, barely concealing his contempt toward Brian, but you ignored it, pushing through. Once you deemed yourself ready, you turned to Rafe, holding out your necklace to him, “Can you help me put this on?”

He sighed and hopped off your bed. Taking the necklace from your hand, he gently turned you around and stepped closer, brushing all your hair to one side. The metal was cold when it hit your collarbone and you shivered a little.

Rafe’s fingers danced over your neck as he fastened the chain and fixed your hair back. Putting both hands on your shoulders, he squeezed a little and smiled at you in the mirror, “Knock ‘em dead, gorgeous.”

Before you could respond, Brian texted you that he was parked outside, waiting for you. With a nervous exhale, you held your fist out for Rafe to bump, “Thanks for keeping me company, Cameron.”

He smiled and gently bumped your knuckles, “Anytime, bud.” You didn’t see his smile slip a little as you left the room.

Brian was blasting some club remix he frequently listened to when you got into this car. He smiled at you, leaning in for a kiss, “Ready, babe?”

“Ready,” you told him, buckling in.

The party wasn’t anything new or special, you’d been to many just like it, but it felt different. You weren’t sure what it was, maybe that you were finally officially on Brian’s arm, but the air felt odd.

Excusing yourself to go to the bathroom, you pulled out your phone to check and see if Rafe had texted you. He had, something short reassuring you that if you needed a ride home later, he’d be up. You breathed out a sigh of relief because Brian had started drinking the moment the two of you stepped in the door and you weren’t sure how he planned on getting you home.

Leaning forward and bracing yourself on the counter, you stared at yourself in the mirror. With an annoyed sigh, you hissed, “Get it together, bitch. This is supposed to be your night.”

And with that, you left the bathroom. Only to find Brian making out with some girl you’d never seen before on the couch. Which really fucking hurt. You didn’t even really know what to do, you’d only been dating for a few weeks, but you’d been emotionally connected to him for much longer.

Tears you didn’t want rose in your eyes as you stared frozen at the two of them groping each other. One of Brian’s friends that you’d met a few times caught your eye. His widened and he shook Brian’s shoulder. Brian, hazy eyed, pulled away and saw you standing there, clearly hurt.

He jumped up, fear in his eyes, and you backed away, shaking your head. You weren’t sure if he chased you, you hightailed it out of the house and down the street, wanting nothing more than to get out of there. Pity was the last thing you wanted from him or his asshole friends who did nothing to stop him.

By the time you’d gotten far enough away that you didn’t hear the music anymore, the cold had set in and you were shivering. Wrapping your arms around yourself, you sniffled several times, trying to get it together. Unfortunately, your tears refused to listen and streamed down your cheeks, not slowing in the slightest.

Suddenly, your phone vibrated, a text from Rafe telling you he’d made it to season four of the show you recommended him and that season three’s finale had been heartbreaking.

How could you not give me even a little heads up, what the fuck

You choked out a laugh through the tears and hit call before thinking about how he’d definitely be able to tell something was up from your voice.

“Hey,” he answered, sounding a little concerned, “you still at the party?”

“Um, not really,” you said, trying to not give away your crying.

It didn’t work, you heard rustling in the background as he asked, “Where are you? Better yet, where’s Brian?”

You sighed, “Probably fucking whatever chick I caught him making out with.”

Rafe cursed lowly before saying, “Send me your location and I’ll come pick you up.”

Hanging up, you sent it to him and sat down on the sidewalk, pulling your knees to your chest. You kind of didn’t want to see Rafe because you didn’t really want the ‘I told you so’ likely to come as soon as you got in the car.

He pulled up, not too long after your tears stopped, and you hopped up to get into the passenger side. You weren’t expecting him to throw it in park and jog around to wrap you into a tight hug before you could get in. It took you by surprise, but it wasn’t unwelcome. After getting over your shock, you squeezed him back tightly, cherishing the unusual show of affection.

It brought the tears back and you sniffled a few times, burying your face into his chest. Rafe held you tightly until you got ahold of yourself again and then pulled the door open to help you into his truck. While it wasn’t unusual for him to do, you couldn’t help but notice for the first time, that it was something Brian never did.

Before you could buckle up, he grabbed one of his sweatshirts off the backseat and handed it to you.

“How are you feeling right now, bud? Do you want to wallow for a bit or do you want to say ‘fuck him’ and move on?”

You sighed, “I don’t know, kinda in the mood to wallow right now.”

Rafe cranked up the heat and nodded before pulling up his Spotify to pick something out. A familiar sounding song started playing and he looked over at you, “This song really encompasses the lonely feeling of wanting someone, great for wallowing.”

You sniffled a few times and turned the volume up before sinking back into the seat. He smiled at you gently and started driving down the street. The words started up and you couldn’t stop the tears anymore.

Don’t cut me down, throw me out, leave me here to waste

Rafe tapped his thumb against the steering wheel to the song as he drove. You quickly recognized his route to the coffee shop the two of you go to. Wiping your nose on the hoodie sleeve, you finally spoke up, “It’s closed.”

“Huh?” he asked, glancing over at you quickly before focusing on the road again.

“Coco Bean, it’s closed.”

“I’m just driving, no destination.”

“Oh,” you said, tuning into the song again.

Could you find a way to let me down slowly / a little sympathy, I hope you can show me / if you wanna go then I’ll be so lonely / if you’re leaving baby let me down slowly

With a long, shuddering sigh, you melted back into the seat and let Rafe drive. You were a little startled when he started to sing softly. He’d hummed in front of you but never sang, and he actually had a pretty good voice.

And I can’t stop myself from falling down

Twisting your fingers through the hem of the sweatshirt, you tilted your head to lean against the cold window as the song started its last bit.

Now I’m slipping through the cracks of your cold embrace / so please, please / could you find a way to let me down slowly

Rafe switched to something slightly more upbeat as you tried to pull yourself together. The two of you drove around for hours, songs switching from upbeat to sad, enough to keep you interested.

“One last song,” he told you, around 3 a.m. and All I Want started up. Rafe had showed you that one before. He reached over and grabbed your hand, squeezing tightly for a few seconds before adding, “Brian’s a dick and you deserve better.”

You squeezed back and nodded, not really knowing what to say.

Two: I’m Good

You’d stubbornly avoided Rate My Professor when trying to schedule a bio class, which was turning out to be a pretty hefty mistake. The guy you picked, mostly because of the 10 a.m. time slot, was a disaster. His teaching style didn’t match your learning style and he barely taught the information he used on the test anyway.

Needless to say, you bombed the first one. Like not a dramatic, ‘I bombed it’ and it turning out to be a C. Like a serious 40%. You weren’t sure how you made it through the rest of your classes, maybe adrenaline or just the pure stubbornness to not have a very public breakdown, but you sent Rafe a very vague text blowing off lunch and went straight to your room.

Face planting onto your bed, you shut your phone off, totally content to not talk to anyone for at least another day. Hours could’ve passed before you finally rolled onto your side, you weren’t sure what time in was, all you knew was that your stomach was growling.

At some point during your wallowing, you roommate had come home, and it had gotten dark outside. All of your weekend plans flew straight out the window and the idea of doing any work when clearly it would be pointless anyway was nauseating.

Eventually, you fell into a restless sleep, dreaming about failing classes and angry bio teachers trying to break your fingers until you finally understood cellular respiration. It was easily one of the worst nights you’d ever had, and by the time the sun rose, you were ready to just stop thinking.

You knew your roommate would eventually come into your room to ask about getting brunch, or to just see what you had planned for the day, but you really didn’t want to see her. What you didn’t expect when your door was finally pushed open, was to see Rafe standing there, holding a bag of food.

“Hey, bud,” he spoke softly, walking slowly toward your bed, “you okay?”

“Do I look okay?” you asked, voice cracking.

Rafe laughed, “No, you don’t. But I did bring your favorite.”

You perked up a little, looking at the bag curiously, “Chicken caesar wrap?”

“Yes ma’am. Would you like to join me on a walk?”

You sighed, but getting out of the room with Rafe sounded kind of good, so you stood and put on a pair of slides, not wanting to put in the effort of actual shoes. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders while the two of you walked down the hallway, and you cherished the closeness.

“What happened?” he finally asked, as the two of you made it out the building and over to a bench outside.

“I failed my test. I don’t know what happened, none of the material he taught was on the test and I just don’t know how to study for that.”

Rafe handed you half of the wrap and let you rest your head on his shoulder before speaking, “Did you check Quizlet, maybe someone who’s already taken it posted something for you to use.”

You shrugged while taking a bite, “Maybe. I mean I know I can come back from this, he drops the lowest test, but I don’t know, I’ve never gotten a grade that bad. It’s so discouraging and I just lost all motivation to do anything.”

He hummed softly and pulled his phone out. After scrolling for a few seconds, he offered you a headphone with a smile, “Maybe this will help.”

Trying to figure out who I am / or who I’m supposed to be / feel good about where I stand / so I can make the most of me

You drummed your fingers on Rafe’s knee to the uplifting beat. He bumped your shoulders together and started eating the other half of the wrap.

You only live once / I’m good with myself / I’m there for my friends / til the very end

Rafe reached out to lace his fingers through yours, catching your attention, before saying, “You know I’ve always got you right?”

You nodded, tears rising for the first time since the numbness gripped you, “Yeah, Cameron, I know.”

I’m good, I’m good, I’m good, I’m good / living life just like I should / wouldn’t change it if I could / I’m good, I’m good, I’m good

When the song ended, you lifted your head up and finished your half of the wrap. Rafe paused the next song playing and smiled down at you gently, “You are the smartest person I’ve ever met, if anyone can beat this asshole bio professor, it’s you.”

“I am pretty smart, huh?”

He didn’t answer, just laughed and leaned down to kiss you on the forehead. You didn’t know what you could do without him.

Three: Blood // Water

It got out of hand before you could stop it. You were tired all the time because of work and your roommate was stressed from school, and her new boyfriend was a huge slob. He used your utilities and ate your food and didn’t pay a lick of rent.

You’d been fuming about it for months, but it really came to head when you realized how often he was staying over and she wasn’t giving you a heads up. One afternoon, you were watching TV on the couch, a rare free afternoon that you wanted to spend in your underwear, no one was home anyway. So you thought.

Your roommate had class, but she’d let her boyfriend in and he’d been sitting in her room without you knowing. Just as you settled in, her door flew open and you shrieked, grabbing for the nearest blanket to cover yourself up with. He stared at you, mouth hanging open.

“Dude, stop fucking looking, what the fuck?!” you yelled, and he slapped a hand over his eyes. Taking the opportunity, you ran to your room and slammed the door shut. He had to go, the boyfriend either needed to stop living rent free or stay out of your personal space.

By the time your roommate made it home, you’d had time to get yourself really really worked up, and you were ready for a fucking fight. Rafe had called at some point and tried to calm you down, but talking it out with him only made you angrier, and he eventually gave up, telling you to not let her walk all over you.

She walked in and toward her room, but you stopped her right outside it by clearing your throat. Maybe, for a more constructive conversation, you could’ve started it better, but you went straight in with, “So do I need to buy Marcus a housewarming gift or is he going to live somewhere else anytime soon?”

She frowned at you, “What?”

“I’m not paying 50% of the rent if your boyfriend is gonna be here as much as I am. I’ll gladly play a third of the rent, but I’m gonna need him to contribute if he’s going to use my hot water and eat my food.”

Your roommate took a defensive stance, “He’s not here that much.”

“Oh yeah? Well then why did I go to wash my work uniform, only to find his shit in the washing machine?”

“That was a one-time thing, he stayed over a few nights and ran out of clothes.”

Fists tightening, you drew yourself up, “Okay, tell me, when’s the last time he went home?”

She paused to think and you nodded, emphasizing your point. Before either of you could say anything else, there was a knock at your door. Your roommate opened it and saw Rafe standing outside. With a huff, she turned back to you, “Well while we’re at it, talking about boys being over all the time, what about Rafe?”

Your jaw dropped, “Rafe isn’t eating your food and showering at 3 a.m. and WALKING OUT WHILE YOU’RE SITTING IN YOUR UNDERWEAR.”

Rafe’s eyes widened, he’d never heard you yell like that before, it was rattling. Your roommate had, but never at her, and she looked taken aback before narrowing her eyes, “Why the fuck were you just sitting in your underwear?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, am I not allowed to do that in the comfort of my own home?”

“Not when Marcus is around.”

You threw your hands up, “That’s the fucking point! I never know when he’s around or isn’t because you don’t have the courtesy to give me the heads up!”

She stepped closer to you as if to shove you, but Rafe stepped between the two of you, putting both of his hands on your shoulders, “Hey, bud, hey, look at me, okay?”

You fought against him, trying to get another look at your roommate, “Never compare that asshole to Rafe, at least Rafe can hold a fucking conversation. You’re dating a piece of wet cardboard.”

“Babe,” Rafe warned you.

“Babe,” she mimicked in a high-pitched voice, “you do everything he tells you to, doormat?”

Rafe’s hands tensed on your shoulders and he narrowed his eyes, “Marcus, better get your ass out here and help me. You’re the root of the whole fucking problem.”

Her bedroom door opened slowly and a very sheepish looking Marcus stood there with a pair of her shoes in hand, “Let’s go for a drive, huh?”

Rafe kept you in place until the other two had left and you sagged into his hold. You couldn’t stop the tears that started falling as soon as the door slammed shut, and Rafe pulled you into a hug. He stroked your hair, “You’re just tired, babe, it’s going to be okay.”

You sniffled pathetically, “Why won’t she just be fucking accommodating.”

He pulled you behind him to your room and shut the door behind you. It was nighttime, and the room went dark immediately, until Rafe turned on the fairy lights you had hanging around your bed. He sat down and patted the empty spot next to him, “You remember when you called me to come hang these damn lights up?”

You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped, “Yeah, you hated me for it.”

“I didn’t hate you, but I wasn’t thrilled.”

Leaning into his side, you sighed, “Did I just fuck things up?”

Rafe wrapped his arms around you and laid down, arranging the two of you on the bed so that you were partially on top of him before he spoke, “I don’t think so. Y’all have been friends for so long, I’m sure she’ll come around.”

You played with his shirtsleeve for a few seconds before looking up at his face. He was already looking down at you, soft smile on his lips, and you stuck your tongue out playfully at him. Rafe laughed and lifted his hips up to fish his phone out of his pocket.

“Oh, you got a song for me?” you asked, leaning further onto him.

“Maybe. You want some angry vibes?”

“Hmmm, I think so, yeah.”

He picked a song after a few seconds and laid back fully, shutting his eyes while you started to hum along. It was catchy.

Look me in my eyes / tell me everything’s not fine / or the people ain’t happy / and the river has run dry

Rafe smiled with his eyes closed as you climbed off the bed to start jumping around. All your angry energy started to drain as you read from the lyrics on your phone.

The price of your greed / is your son and your daughter / what you gon’ do / when there’s blood in the water

You grabbed his arm, trying to pull him up to jump around with you, but you weren’t nearly strong enough. Rafe laughed at you, eyes finally open again, until you huffed and tossed his arm back. He stayed down watching you as the song built.

I am the people / I am the storm / I am the riot / I am the swarm / when the last’s tree’s fallen / the animal can’t hide / money won’t solve it / what’s your alibi

It was probably for the best your roommate had left because if she was still there, she’d be furious with your screaming. By the time the song ended, you were breathing heavily and Rafe was laughing. Collapsing on top of him, you tried to catch your breath.

Rafe brushed an errant strand of hair out of your face, “That was beautiful, sweetheart.”

You rolled your eyes but smiled, “Felt good, thanks for the assist, Cameron.”

The smile slowly fell from his lips as he kept staring at you, and you were confused. Before you could ask what was wrong, he shut his eyes and leaned up to kiss you.

It wasn’t totally unexpected. You’d thought about it a few times, and you were pretty sure he had too, but he’d never said anything, so you figured it was out of the question. So, while you weren’t prepared, you were happily surprised.

After a few seconds to work through the shock, you started kissing him back. He kept it short, you figured he would with emotions running as high as they were in you.

“Anytime,” he told you, brushing your lips with his thumb.

Four: Let You Down

Your boss informed you that there was nothing that could be done. That the department was going through budget cuts and they’d be laying people off. Unfortunately, since you were the youngest, you were the first to go.

The early shift was your normal gig, you always woke up around 5 a.m. to get ready and get coffee, and that morning, you woke up to a missed call and a message from your boss. Rafe was still sleeping, so you unplugged your phone and took it with you to the kitchen to listen to the message while you made coffee.

After turning the kettle on, you brought the phone to your ear, and immediately regretted it. You missed the first part of the message, but got the gist from, “So sorry to have to let you go, with the cuts in our department, we have to make hard decisions- “

And you didn’t really care to hear the rest. Three years of your life wasted on that place that promised you a job post-grad, and then just cut the rope. Your hands were shaking and you shut the kettle off, deciding to just go back to bed and cuddle with Rafe until his alarm went off.

Unfortunately, Rafe was a light sleeper and woke up when you tried to get back into your spot next to him.

“Babe, wha?” he mumbled, rubbing his eyes.

“Nothing,” you whispered, “go back to sleep.”

Rafe squinted at you, “Don’t you have work?”

You sighed, “Not anymore, I got let go.”

He sat up and you groaned, not really wanting to hash it out with him at 5:30 in the morning. Fumbling to switch the lamp on, Rafe pulled you into a hug with his other arm and you couldn’t stop yourself from sinking into his arms.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart, I know you liked that job.”

“They told me like two fucking weeks ago they were looking at a managerial position for me. I just, I don’t know why I was on the first list of cuts.”

Rafe huffed out a laugh, “I wish I could tell you, but unfortunately, I can’t get into the mindset of actual buffoons.”

Your lips quirked up, “They are buffoons, aren’t they?”

The two of you sat in the middle of the bed for who knows how long, just hanging onto each other, and you were almost back asleep when Rafe moved again, this time to stand up. You glared at him, “Can’t we sleep?”

“We can nap later, but I want to see the sunrise.”

He grabbed his keys from the desk by the door and you followed him out to the kitchen. There was a place the two of you had gone before, near the reservoir, for sunsets, but you’d never done a sunrise before. You started the coffee making process again and pulled on one of his sweatshirts while he leaned against the wall, looking up what time the sun rose.

“It says 6:40 so we have plenty of time to get there.”

“Car sex,” you offered jokingly.

“Make the coffee, babe,” he dismissed, pulling you in to ruffle your hair.

You shoved him away, pouting, “I can’t make the coffee when you’re manhandling me.”

He didn’t let you push him far, grabbing onto your hand where it was pushing his chest and pulled you back to him. The smell of coffee filled the kitchen as he hugged you. Your face was buried in his chest and the two of you just breathed together until he pulled back enough to catch your lips with his.

You pushed up on your toes, leaning further into him. He loosened his grip on your hands and you slid them up to cup his jaw. It was quiet in the kitchen, the only sound coming from the coffee maker and the slight hum of the air conditioner. You basked in it.

Rafe suddenly dropped both of his arms to your legs and lifted you to sit on the counter. The sudden movement startled you into letting out a little squeal of surprise, but he swallowed it up with another kiss.

You draped your arms over his shoulders and he leaned all of his weight on the counter. In the background, you barely heard the coffee kick off and your roommate moving around in her room. Rafe brought a hand up to stroke up and down your thigh, fully distracting you again.

The two of you only broke apart when Rafe’s alarm started going off. He pulled away, annoyed, and then cursed when he realized what time it was. Helping you down, he told you, “We’ve got 30 minutes to get to the res.”

After quickly fixing two to-go mugs, you let Rafe pull you out of the apartment to his truck. For once, he didn’t pick any music, just let the radio play softly in the background while the two of you sipped on coffee. You rolled the window down and let one arm hang out the side.

Rafe reached over and grabbed your other hand, bringing it to his lips to kiss softly without looking up from the road. You grinned at him, “You’re soft as fuck, Cameron.”

He laughed, “Only for you, sweetheart.”

The sky started to lighten as the two of you drove and you left turned your focus back out the window. By the time Rafe parked, the sun had started to rise, and Rafe finally plugged his phone in to play a song.

“Something soft?” he asked.

You nodded and queued up something before hopping out. Rafe grabbed a blanket from the backseat and pulled the tailgate down. It was the blanket the two of you normally sat on to watch the sunsets, so you assumed Rafe wanted to sit back there together for it.

Grabbing the coffees, you walked around the truck to join him just as the song started playing through the speakers.

Feels like we’re on the edge right now / I wish that I could say I’m proud / I’m sorry that I let you down / let you down

You climbed up with him and settled in, your back against his chest. Rafe rested his chin on your head and you shut your eyes for a few seconds to let it all soak in.

I feel like every time I talk to you, you’re in an awful mood / what else can I offer you / there’s nothing left right now, I gave it all to you

“What am I going to do?” you whispered to Rafe.

“I don’t know, sweetheart,” he told you, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

All these voices in my head get loud / and I wish that I could shut them out / I’m sorry that I let you down

“But we’ll figure it out,” he told you, sounding totally sure.

The sun slowly crept up as the two of you sat in silence, both hoping that things were going to turn out okay.

Five: You Make My Dreams (Come True)

“I hate men,” you said from your spot laying on the floor, “why are they the worst.”

Rafe laughed, nudging your hip with his foot, “Come on, sweetheart, I think some Waffle House will cheer you up, huh?”

“Nothing can cheer me up right now. Maybe alcohol.”

“You can’t get drunk.”

“Why not?” you demanded, a little childishly.

“Because you have an interview tomorrow, and it’s just a game.”

You were offended, staring at him open-mouthed, “I know you didn’t just tell me that the Leafs getting eliminated from the playoffs is just a game.”

Rafe didn’t respond, just kept looking at you, hand held out to help you up from the floor. You huffed and stubbornly stayed down, “No, I will throw myself off a balcony before going with you for that disrespect.”

With a sigh, Rafe bent down and pulled you up, you fighting him the entire way. He shook you gently, “Knock it off, mamas.”

“No, you can’t tell me what to do.”

“I can carry you, and I will, so you may as well just walk.”

Which was a good point. You crossed your arms and tilted your chin up, “Fine, Waffle House it is.”

“Fine,” he agreed, following you out of the apartment. Rafe tried to start conversation a few times during the walk to the Waffle House down the street, but you weren’t having it. After blatantly ignoring his attempts, he finally gave up.

“Rafe,” you asked, after a few seconds.

“What?”

“Can you play Hall and Oates? I think it might be good for me to hear.”

He raised his eyebrows, “Are you going to have a breakdown on the side of the road if I play it?”

“No,” which was a total lie and both of you knew it, but Rafe, being the accommodating boyfriend that he is, played it.

What I want, you’ve / And it might be hard to handle

And your eyes immediately filled with tears, just like both of you knew would happen. Rafe wrapped you into a hug while you cried, still playing the song so you could let it out.

Oh yeah, well well you / you make my dreams come true

Sniffling, you told him, “I thought it was their year.”

“I know, baby,” he soothed, hand running up and down your back.

“I want them to succeed and be happy.”

Again, he said, “I know.”

“It’s mostly the refs’ faults anyway, you know the league is dedicated to sucking Bruin dick.”

Rafe snorted, “I do know, yes.”

Softly and sadly, you sang along, “You make my dreams come true.”

The song finished and Rafe tucked his phone away, giving you one last squeeze before pulling away. You sighed and the two of you resumed walking toward Waffle House. He told you, “My dad is a big Bruins guy.”

“WHAT?!”

+ One: Outnumbered

Throughout your relationship, Rafe was always the more put-together one. He always had his shit together while you tended to be a little louder and messier. While you had some experience with handling him in this state, it wasn’t much.

You figured something must’ve been wrong when he didn’t answer any of your texts, but you weren’t sure what. He’d flown home for Thanksgiving, he normally didn’t because it was only a few days, but his sister was going to be in town and he hadn’t seen her in a while. You were invited, but your parents wanted to visit you for the day, so you stayed behind.

When your parents left, you stayed in and watched football, not really wanting to do anything except talk to Rafe who promised to watch one of the games with you over FaceTime. Unfortunately, it was halftime and you hadn’t heard from him.

In fact, you didn’t hear from him until that night. You were getting ready for bed when your phone finally vibrated and you answered it, mid washing your face.

“Hey, bubba.”

“Hey, babe.”

“Get caught up today?” you asked, rinsing the cleanser off.

He laughed humorlessly, and you felt something in your stomach, “I did, my dad had some thoughts he wanted to share with me.”

“Bruins fan dad?”

“The very same.”

You grinned, “Well I’m sure they weren’t valid then.”

Rafe paused for a few seconds, “Well, maybe they were a little valid.”

“Tell me what he said, and I’ll let you know for sure.”

It was silent, you could barely hear Rafe’s breathing, before he continued, “Just that I’m wasting my time. And I’m gonna come running back to him when I can’t get a job with this pointless degree.”

Which, where the fuck do you even start with that. Then, you remembered, scrambling up, you told Rafe to hold on while you grabbed your laptop and pulled up Spotify. You’d found a song and been saving it to show him, but there was no time like the present.

“Listen to this song I found.”

He hummed in agreement as it started up.

Don’t tell me this is all for nothin’ / I can only tell you one thing / on the nights you feel outnumbered / baby I’ll be out there somewhere

You felt unsure as the song went on and he didn’t react. The song played on, you tapping your fingers against your knees anxiously. Normally you could tell what Rafe was thinking based on his facial expression, and you wish you’d switched to FaceTime before starting the song.

There’ll be days when it’s difficult / but I ask you never leave behind the reciprocal / we’re past that / love is not designed for the cynical / so we have that

Rafe didn’t speak again until the end and it sounded a little choked up, “You found that one for me, huh?”

Slamming your laptop shut, you hit the FaceTime button and waited to respond until you saw his face. Rafe’s eyes were red and his cheeks looked wet and you just wanted to hug him.

“Yeah, that was for you.”

“I love you, you know?” he asked, “probably should’ve waited to tell you in person, but.”

You laughed, “Probably so, but I love you too, Cameron.”

“I’m coming home tomorrow instead of Sunday, come over?”

Settling into your bed, you smiled at him, “Yeah, just let me know.”

His soft smile was burned into your memory that night as you fell asleep restlessly, ready for him to be home with you again.

[random-mha-thoughts]

Jerk (Todoroki x Reader)

Pairing: Todoroki x Fem!Reader

@adainelartz​ asked:  “ I read your oneshots and I think they're great! I wanted to request an angst (sad or hapy end) oneshot where the reader has a fire quirk or something similar, and Shouto and Her had been classmate in elementary or middle school and people used to bully Y/n chan for thinking she could be like endeavor with her being weak or a top hero with a quirk like hers and Shouto just watches every beat ups given to y/n chan and Y/n chan decides to snap in UA and take revenge and targets to hurt Shouto most.”

Genre: Angst to slight fluff

Word count: 3,361

Tags:  @yuki-osaki​ @liviitehe​ @iamsoftsodonttoucheume-blog​ 

a/n:  I swear this was going to take a shorter amount of time to write and it was going to be a lot shorter as well.  But what can I say, I’m a writer; I write, my brain starts working, I write more, the gears turns more, what do I do, say no?  No, I keep writing.

This ending isn't the best and it feels kind of rushed, but I also didn't know how else to end it and I wanted to hurry and finish it and I already almost fell asleep sitting up at my keyboard at least twice, so I wrote the first thing that came to my head.  I hope I did your request justice, babe~ Thank you again for letting me write it~

Also, if you haven’t seen, I hit 600 followers yesterday!  Though I don’t know why you all are here, thank you for being here and sticking through my poor update schedule.  I appreciate you all.  Enjoy the story~

I hate him.

He's oblivious as I bore holes into the back of his head.  Mr. I-Got-In-On-Recommendation just sits there studying like the studious boy he is.  Everyone thinks he's so great, but I know he's no better than a bully.

"Are you okay, (Y/n)?" Jirou asks, eyeing me warily as he headphone jacks flit around.  "You need to calm down, your food's already dead."

Looking down, there were holes in my salmon from me poking at it.  "I'm fine, just thinking of something."

"You must be thinking of killing someone then," Kaminari laughs nervously, scooting an inch away from me.  "I'd hate to be on the receiving end of that."

He flinches when I smirk at him.  "You probably should be."  I'm only joking, but after Bakugou, I'm the next scariest person in 1-A.  It doesn't help that my quirk is also dangerous.

But it wasn't always that way, unfortunately.  Back in middle school, I could barely light a candle with my fire quirk, flames barely stuttering out a cold, dark red flame before collapsing on itself.  I've always been vocal about being a powerful top hero, and my quirk should've matched those ambitions.  Instead, I was a weakling.  No one believed me or took me seriously.  They laughed at me, teased me, scoffed at me, disregarded all my dreams.  But I never gave up, I kept my dreams close to me and resolved to work harder.

I tried befriending Todoroki just because I thought he could give me pointers, since he has a Fire quirk also, but he wasn't very open to making friends or talking about that half of his quirk.  In fact, he was always cold to everyone, but somehow he was still popular.  So popular that some girls in my classes berated me for getting close to him.  They were my worst bullies; just because I tried being friendly with their crush, they started teasing me about how weak I was, humiliating me in front of the class, writing nasty messages on my desk, pouring water on me.  It even got to the point where they started pulling me out after class and during lunch to beat me up.  I would be the punching bag or target of all their quirks.

"This is what a real hero fights like!  Not some puny whore like you!"

They'd growl and laugh at me, and I couldn't defend myself.  And on a few occasions, I'd see Todoroki standing a distance away as I was battered and bruised.

I didn't care that he didn't know it was because of him that I was being abused.  I was angry because he just stood there, watching as those girls beat me up and called me names.  I curse his apathy, those cold eyes as he stared right at me, met eyes with me, and chose to walk away as if nothing was happening.  Just because his quirk is already strong, he looked down on weak fools like me.  What a pompous asshole.

Months before entrance exams, I'd had enough of being a busted-up rag doll.  I trained late into the wee hours of morning, pouring over countless online guides for unleashing your quirk.  The first time I was able to sustain a bright red flame for more than 30 seconds, I almost cried in victory.  The more I trained, the more powerful and hotter my flames became, spanning from red to orange to bright yellow, even white in short bursts.  By the time the UA Entrance Exam rolled around, I'd attained incredible control over the temperature and sizes of flames I can make.  Getting into UA has been my best achievement since I worked so hard for it.

Imagine how bitter I was when I heard Todoroki got in on recommendations.

I wasn't just bitter, I was pissed.  A cold, pompous jerk like him got in just because he's known to have a really powerful quirk and his father is a Pro Hero.  He doesn't even have a hero attitude!  How can someone who doesn't even help a bully victim be a real hero?

From the first day of starting UA, I vowed to make Shouto Todoroki pay for his mistakes.

"Hey, (Y/n)?"  Kirishima places a hand on my shoulder as we walk back to our classroom.  "You went to the same junior high as Todoroki, right?"

"Yeah, why?"  I try not to visibly bristle at his name.

Shark-Teeth hesitates, trying to word his next question as delicate as possible as his features twist awkwardly.  "You two aren't very fond of each other, are you?"

"We just didn't talk," I put it bluntly.

Kiri rubs behind his neck.  "I would've thought that, you know, since you two have similar quirks you would've at least-"

"He's not a very..."  Friendly, kind, decent- "Talkative person.  He didn't really have friends in school."  I sit down in my seat and pull out my books, signalling I want to end the conversation.

Thankfully, Kirishima recognizes this, mouthing an "Okay..." before retreating to his own seat for class to begin.

.

Later that day, we're into duo teams for battle trials.  My teammate ends up being Ojiro.  At least it's not that jerk.  As Bakugou and Midoriya fight it out, we're discussing tactics in the back of the room.

"You're much better at close combat than me," I explain, "So you should go out and take on the other members while I guard the weapon.  If you need backup, I'll come out to help you."  I already anticipate how Todoroki's going to attack.  Being pitted against him is the perfect opportunity for me to get back at him.

When it's our turn, we set up inside the building near the weapon.  I tug my gloves over my long sleeves.  "Stay behind me.  Whatever happens, don't panic," I mutter as I stand near the blond's tail.

Ojiro's confused expression is about to ask me why when the entire building starts rumbling.  I activate orange fire out of my hands as the ice starts sweeping inside the room.  Typical.  At first, the ice is about to trap us, but I expand the size of the flames and sweep them over the entire inside of the room, careful not to burn the weapon.

"How did you know he would do that?" Ojiro asks, obviously impressed by my foresight.

"Instinct.  Todoroki's going to come in here thinking he's frozen us to capture the warhead.  When he does, I'll distract him while you run out and get the jump on Shoji, okay?"

As I predicted, Todoroki strolls into the room, eyebrows furrowing when he sees the room is completely rid of ice.  "What-"

I don't give him chance to react as I blow orange flames directly at him.  He puts up an ice barrier in the nick of time, my quirk completely encompassing him in heat.  I nod for my teammate to hurry, and follows my orders, slipping through the door and bouncing out a window.

You're mine, jackass.  I rush at him through the flames, heart pumping fresh rage through my veins.  He raises his arm to shoot ice at me, but I jump up above him, propelling myself with flames from my left hand and shooting from my other one at him once I'm soaring near the back of his head.  Landing right behind, I swipe his legs before he can spot me, effective in tripping him to his knee.  I kick down, sending him onto his face with a groan.  Gotcha.

Unfortunately for me, his right arm finds my ankle, sending numbing ice up my leg.  "You can't win that easily," I grit out.  I step on his free left wrist, hearing the crack under my foot, and shoot another flame blast at the ice on my leg.  Ignoring his grunts of pain, I crouch down and pin his right hand behind his back.  "And that's checkmate, Todoroki-san."

"Alright, that's enough, Young (Y/n)!"  All Might yells out through the speakers.  "The villain team has captured the hero team!"

Smirking, I shove Todoroki aside and walk away without bothering to look at him again.  "So much for someone getting into UA on recommendations," I mutter to myself.

Once I'm out of the building, Ojiro raises an eyebrow at me.  "Where's Todoroki?"

I simply shrug.  "He'll be down in a little, I guess."

Turning back around, the jerk is exiting out of the building, nursing his left wrist against his chest.  I face away quickly, just a twinge of guilt invading my mind.

"Hey, (Y/n), I think he's hurt," Ojiro's calm voice points out.

I scowl at him.  "It's just his wrist, he'll be fine," I bark, stomping off to the rest of the class.  It's not fair that I feel guilty, he deserves it!

.

"You sure there's no beef between you and Todoroki?" Kirishima asks as he walks next to me at the end of the day.

"Fuck off, Shark-Teeth!"  I'm still in a bad mood.  It's just his wrist, come on!  "One trip to Recovery Girl and he was completely fine, I don't know why everyone's so bent out of shape about it!"

"Because you didn't even help him afterwards.  That's kinda not heroic, don't you think?"

I round on him, about to grab his shirt and blast him in the face, instead choosing to clench my fists.  "You don't know what 'mean' is!  Stay out of this!"  I walk away from him without looking back, mumbling to myself.  How can he say that about me not being heroic?  If he knew what Todoroki did, he would say the same thing.

On my way to the train station, I spot that familiar mop of bicolored hair staring at me with the same neutral gaze I hate.  Glancing down, I see his wrist is fine before quickly darting away.  Pompous jerk making me feel bad.

.

After that day, this idiot always had the audacity to stare at me.  I always feel his eyes on me, it's so annoying.  And he makes it so obvious, he doesn't even look away when I catch him, he just stares at me.  It's enough that Kirishima's words got to me, I don't need him confusing me with this staring contest we have going on.  If he wants to talk to me, he should do it already.

During the next few training sessions, we began sparring against each other with our quirks.  People have slowly been becoming scared of me during these times because of how rough I was.

Once, I got to fight Bakugou.  It was really fun going all out against someone who's just as aggressive.

This time, my opponent is the jerk himself.  When Aizawa announced the pairs, Kirishima was about to pull me aside, but saw my murderous look and chose he would like to live.  Everyone around us found their partners and started their individual training.  While the two of us stared at each other from across the mat.  I want to smash his emotionless pretty face in, I hate that I don't know what he's thinking!

If he's not gonna make the first move, I will.  I rush up to him, igniting the flames in my palms.  He's ready for me this time, standing his ground as I bound up and hunkering into a fighting stance.   I throw up a hand towards his face once I close in on him, ready to blow his face off.

Todoroki catches my hand by the wrist, bringing his right hand up to trap me in an ice coffin.  I slap that hand away and explode out a burst of orange flames, making him let go and stagger a few steps back.  He immediately sends a trail of ice down to secure my feet in place, but I respond by directing both my hands downward, propelling myself off the ground and towards him in a giant, sweeping leap.

The familiar weightlessness of being in the air fuels the adrenaline pumping through me.  He's my enemy, and I'm taking him down.

As I launch more continuous blasts at him while I soaring towards him, Todoroki coats his arm with ice to block his face.  But he's in for a surprise.  Moving close enough, I drop kick his arm down before landing a punch straight in his face.  My body lands on top of his torso, pinning him to the ground.  Winding back to land another punch on him, he suddenly launches his upper body upwards, headbutting me in the nose.

I let out a pained growl, reeling back as I feel the tingling of tears pooling in the corner of my eyes, and Todoroki uses this opportunity to flip us over so he's on top.  Placing his hand on my shoulder, I'm instantly plunged into an ice coffin under him.  Heaving out an icy breath, he slowly rises to his feet.  The puckered skin of his scar already starts swelling into a bruise where I punched him, and forehead cracked from where he headbutt my nose.

The anger boils my blood hot as my flames.  He's not winning over me!  I'm not letting that happen!  With a growling scream, heat floods from my iced palms before I'm broken free from my confines.  White and blue flames erupt from my hands, directing them straight up at Todoroki.  The ice barrier he puts up to protect himself melts faster than ice cream on a hot day against this new color of my fire.  It continuously flares out from me as I stand up, pointing right at him and getting closer.  I ball my fist up and throw my fire-coated fists at his forearms, the anger still building inside me.  I want him to yield before me already, so he can pay for his sin.

Even after my quirk blinks out, I continue punching at him, blinded by both rage and hot tears.  It wasn't until something wrapped around my arms and restrained me suspended slightly off the ground that I finally stop.

"I'm not putting you down until you're cooled down," Aizawa growls, his quirk and capture weapon smothering me.

Everyone was already staring at the scene.  Although I scowl, I go limp and show no signs of resistance.  When my body finally relaxes, I feel a sharp pain shooting up my hands and forearm.  Once I'm free, I inspect my hands, noticing the beginning blisters of burns coating everything from my fingertips to my elbows.  Ouch.  My fire's never done that before.  It's probably those flames I used.  The dull pain in my nose starts throbbing.

"Both of you took this training a little too seriously," our teacher glowers at us.  "I'll deal your punishment later.  Can I trust that you won't kill each other going to see Recovery Girl?"

"Yes sir," we both mutter out.

.

The walk over there was quiet.  I trudged ahead because I didn't want to see his face, but I had to feel his gaze bore into my skull again.  After a good scolding from Recovery Girl, we were told to rest for a little while in the office before going back to class.  I try to lie back and ignore him, indulging myself in quiet.  I was so full of emotion that my flames turned hotter than they have before, but I have to use them sparingly since they can burn my normally fire-resistant skin.  I'll have to make some adjustments to my hero costume gloves too.

"Do you have a person vendetta against me or something?"

Even just the sound of his blank voice makes me roll my eyes.  "Hm, I wonder what could've given you that crazy idea."

Todoroki rolls up to a sitting position and faces me.  Just like mine, his arms are wrapped in bandages.  Apparently, because I punched him with my white-blue fire, he has some burns too, though not as severe as my own.  He peers at me from one grey eye, the other one covered by a bag of ice he nestles against his new bruise.  "I'd like to know why."

I clench my fists weakly against the pain.  "I really don't feel like burning this office to a crisp right now, so we shouldn't talk about it."

"I think it's only fair when someone's holding a grudge against another, both parties should be clear on what the grudge entails."

Stupid logical idiot.  "Fine."  I sit myself up with a little more difficulty and flash him a harsh glare.  "When we were in Junior High, you pushed me away when I tried to be friendly with you.  I know you remember how weak I was and how much everyone else teased me because I said I want to be a top hero, like your dad.  You were cold to me that way, but that's not the only reason I hate you.  These girls in our class didn't like that I was getting close to you, so they started teasing me, harassing me, and beat me up."  I pivot my entire body towards him as I hiss my next words, "And you watched them without interfering.  You let a victim get bullied and you did nothing.  Someone who wants to be a hero and save people, and got into this school on a recommendation, can't even be bothered to be a hero to his classmates when they're being bullied."  Shaking my head, I add, "You disgust me.  You're no hero, you're just an extremely powerful pompous asshole.  You make me sick."

Todoroki's entire demeanor changes.  Instead of the cold expression he always displays, his eyebrows relax out of their furrowed position.  He looks down at his wrapped arms.  "I...didn't think at the time.  Yes, I saw it happen.  Frankly, I was disgusted by you having a similar quirk as my father and wanting to be a hero after him."  His left hand clenches.  "That power repulses me, which is why I never use it in combat.  Watching you go through all that, I rationalized to myself that you were strong enough to take it."

His fist relaxes and he bows his head somberly.  "I know it's no excuse for what I did, I apologize for that.  I take full responsibility for your hatred."

I'm quiet, kind of stunned.  I've sometimes imagined Todoroki apologizing to me, but seeing it happen is somehow surreal.  Rubbing the back of my head, I admit, "Well, I have to say that it's partially because of you that I was spurred to start training and become as I am now.  So thank you, I guess."  And although I really don't want to, I also say, "I'm sorry I broke your wrist in training last week.  And burned you today.  And almost tried to kill you in general.  It was all overboard and I've been a huge jerk about this whole thing."

He offers a nod.  "I believe it's safe to say our differences have been settled, then.  I hope we can patch things up and become better classmates now that this is all behind us."

Without looking at him, I hold out my fist between our beds.  When he takes too long, I roll my eyes.  "It's a fist bump, it's what f-friends do."

I sense his eyes dart between my definitely tinted cheeks and my fist, before his fingers daintily close over it.  "I'd rather do this, if you don't mind."

Peeking over at him, I open my hand, allowing him to gently clasp my hand between his fingers and his palm.  A new sense of warmth washes over me when I look into his eyes.  Though his features are as non-emotive as ever, his relaxed, mismatching orbs rest on me in what I can only place as support or respect.

"You're strong, (Y/n), and although my previous unfair actions towards you are what primarily coaxed it out, I know you already were in your mind and heart.  I look forward to seeing it as we both progress to becoming heroes together."

His slight softening shifts something within both of us.  And that moment told me that our new relationship would evolve into something greater.

[catfe-overlord]

“Feral”

Part 1

A whumpy, angsty, probably (in the next chapters) going to be pretty fluffy KiriBaku fanfic by me !

::In which Bakugou is hit by a quirk that makes him go straight beast mode, and Kirishima is the only one who can even hope to protect his friend from himself::

>>>>>>>>>>>>>

“Oi! Don’t fuckin’ shove me, Shitty Hair!”

Kirishima only brightened at the way Bakugou acknowledged him. He found it to be endearing. Early in their friendship, Kirishima would’ve thought his friend meant it, but by now he knew perfectly well that it was all part of Bakugou’s personality. He said all these shitty things but he didn’t mean it, not really.

“We don’t want to keep the others waiting!” the red-haired hero-in-training complained. “And here I thought you were the most punctual guy I knew.”

“Tch, I’m on time when I wanna be,” Bakugou muttered. He slung his shopping bag over his shoulder and straightened as Kirishima continued to pull on his free arm in a poor attempt to get the boy to move faster.

The two boys had come to the mall with a few other classmates for a little therapeutic shopping to get their minds off the recent battle. Bakugou originally said no, but after Kirishima asked him to tag along, the explosive boy grumpily agreed. Everyone split up into smaller groups after agreeing to meet up for lunch at noon, leaving the two alone to do their own window shopping.

Kirishima bought a cool red sweatshirt and a new pair of crocs since his old ones were getting pretty worn out. He stocked up on hair dye and his favorite gel too. Bakugou bought a new pair of sound-dampening headphones, saying something like I have to drown out all the stupid noise you idiots make all the damn time.

The restaurant was a short walk from the mall, only a couple blocks south. It was everyone’s favorite curry restaurant, the one they almost regularly met up at. The door jingled as they entered, and Uraraka waved from a big round table in the back corner.

“Hey, guys!” Iida said pleasantly as they approached, then stood to greet the two. “Glad you could join us for a meal. We’ve taken the liberty of ordering your drinks. I hope neither of you mind.”

“Kacchan, I ordered you a chai tea,” said Midoriya shyly. “I-I remember you liked those in middle school.”

Kirishima knew this was true. Bakugou almost always ordered chai tea with his lunch when they went out. Bakugou didn’t thank the green-haired boy though, which was to be expected. The blond made a sound from the back of his throat similar to a growl before taking one of the two open seats beside Uraraka, leaving the one beside Ashido open for Kirishima.

Ashido was twirling her fingers through her pink hair. “I ordered you a coffee, Eijiro. Black, like you like it.”

Kirishima beamed. “Thanks, Mina!”

Everyone talked about school and their families, no one mentioning the recent fight against Shigarake. It was too soon, and everyone still had wounds left to heal, whether physical or mental. Bakugou was mostly quiet, which was to be expected, other than the occasional SHUT UP, DEKU, YOU DAMN NERD! or MIND YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS, PIKACHU. When the server took everyone’s orders, he’d said, “I want the spiciest curry you have.” Kirishima winced.

They left the restaurant satisfied, bellies full of their favorite curry, and everyone headed back to their dorms together. Bakugou and Kirishima followed from the back of the group, listening to the chatter of their classmates.

When Kirishima noticed the scowl on Bakugou’s face was deeper than usual, he elbowed his friend’s side. “Hey, something up, man? You don’t seem like yourself.”

Bakugou glared, red eyes meeting crimson. “OF COURSE I SEEM LIKE MYSELF, WHO ELSE WOULD I SEEM LIKE?!”

Kirishima chuckled. “No, I mean you just seem a little lost in your own head. Something on your mind?”

Bakugou looked ahead and stuffed his hands in his pockets. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Kirishima rushed a few feet ahead and turned in a one-eighty, walking backwards so Bakugou would have no choice but to look at the red-head. “I get it if you don’t want to talk right now. Just know I’m always here to listen, alright? If something’s bothering you and you need to get it off your chest, I’m around.”

Bakugou pursed his lips. He knew Kirishima was a persistent bastard and wasn’t going to back down until he was satisfied, so Bakugou offered him a small nod. Whether he’d take him up on his offer, Kirishima wasn’t sure. Probably not, but even he could appreciate the gesture.

Suddenly, there was a loud cry for help from somewhere ahead. Everyone was on red alert, ready to leap into action, with or without their hero costumes and support items.

They raced ahead two blocks, only to find absolute chaos around the corner. Vehicles were crashed and left abandoned as people swarmed, everyone running for their lives but no one seemed to know which way to go. Kirishima couldn’t figure out what was causing the commotion.

Midoriya and Uraraka started corralling people, slowing them down just long enough to get the scoop on the situation. Iida was contacting the authorities while Ashido called Aizawa for backup. Bakugou shook himself out of his stupor before Kirishima managed it, pulling him forward to do their part and help out the scene before them.

“They’re crazy!” Kirishima overhead a man explaining to Midoriya. “That woman leapt onto my car and started smashing in my windshield. She would’ve killed me!”

“—He was a monster,” a woman was saying to Uraraka. Her voice was shaky, maybe in shock. “H-he was like a feral beast.”

“Do you know which way the villains went?” Midoriya asked. The man pointed down the street.

That was enough answer for Bakugou. He blasted off in that direction, leaving Kirishima to catch up. He wasn’t nearly as fast as the blond, but Kirishima was a pretty good runner. He wasn’t too far behind Bakugou when he finally reached his classmate.

Bakugou was standing in front of a woman, a wild look in her eyes. She looked terrified for her life. Her blouse was torn, but she didn’t seem to be hurt. She was attempting to explain what happened.

Then her eyes caught Kirishima, and her posture changed. She looked angry. In hardly a split second, she pecked a kiss on Bakugou’s cheek and moved to take off like a bullet. Bakugou was fast though, and he managed to catch her by the elbow before she could manage her escape.

But he stiffened then. Kirishima couldn’t see his face, but even from behind it looked as though something passed through him. The woman slipped out of his grasp and was gone.

“Bakugou!” Kirishima cried, knowing something was definitely off by the strange posture. “Bakugou, what’s wrong?”

Kirishima finally reached him, grabbing him by the shoulders and spinning him around. Bakugou swayed in his grasp but managed to stay on his feet. His eyes met Kirishima’s, and the red-head immediately noticed the size of his pupils—they were so dilated Kirishima could barely see the red of his irises. He blinked a few times, seemingly unable to focus on Kirishima.

“Bakugou? Can you hear me?” Kirishima tried, panic sending a shiver up his spine.

He gave no sign he heard his classmate. Instead, he slumped forward, crashing into Kirishima’s chest and clutching at his head like it was about to burst.

“Bakugou, please—please talk to me,” Kirishima begged.

A low growl resonated from somewhere deep in his chest. He looked up at Kirishima, his lip curled up in a snarl and brows knit, making him look angrier than Kirishima had ever seen him. That was saying something, because Bakugou was always angry. His eyes were focused now, but they weren’t his. The pupils were slit like a cat’s.

This wasn’t the Bakugou he had befriended and cared for.

Bakugou suddenly swiped his hand across Kirishima’s face, who barely managed to activate his quirk in time. His nails glanced off Kirishima’s skin, and the red head realized they weren’t just nails—they were claws. His hands had turned completely black, fingernails elongated into razor-sharp claws, and his teeth were sharpened into fangs, almost as sharp as Kirishima’s.

That woman before, the one Bakugou had been talking to—this must have been her quirk. She’d kissed his cheek, and then it was goodbye Bakugou.

H-he was like a feral beast.

Nausea tugged at Kirishima’s stomach, the curry threatening to make a reappearance. How the hell was he supposed to get Bakugou back from this? He doubted Bakugou could even understand what he was saying.

“Bakugou, please!” he tried anyway, jumping back and hardening on instinct as the explosive boy made another swipe. “It’s me, Kirishima! Your friend!”

Bakugou lunged, raking his new claws across Kirishima’s favorite shirt. Kirishima might’ve whimpered, but he couldn’t afford to care about a stupid shirt right now. He needed to help Bakugou before the boy hurt someone who didn’t have a protective hardening quirk.

Kirishima made his first advance: he threw a rock-solid fist into Bakugou’s jaw, and it collided with an ugly sound. Bakugou stumbled, but he regained his composure in mere seconds. Another growl reverberated from his throat, and Kirishima swallowed. He didn’t want to hurt his friend, but he had a feeling Bakugou wouldn’t stop until he physically couldn’t fight anymore.

“Kirishima! Bakugou!” called Iida, racing toward them from behind. “Have you apprehended any of the perpetrators yet?”

“Iida, stay back!” Kirishima cried, forcing the young Ingenium to halt in confusion. “Bakugou’s been hit by a weird quirk. He’s not himself!” He ducked out of the way of another swipe. “He’s gone feral!”

Iida moved to help, but Kirishima held up a hand to hold him back. “Let me help!”

“No!” Kirishima argued. “I can handle Bakugou. You go help the others. I’m sure Bakugou’s not the only one.”

Iida didn’t look happy about it, but he nodded and raced off toward the commotion yet ahead.

“Alright, Bakugou,” Kirishima said casually, putting his fists up like he did before all their spars. “It’s just you and me. Let’s not drag anyone else into this.”

Bakugou leapt forward, swiping those damn claws across Kirishima’s chest. His shirt was in tatters, practically falling off. His entire midsection was uncovered.

Kirishima sent another fist at his friend, but Bakugou dodged it swiftly, ducking below the swing and popping up again to wrap his hands around Kirishima’s neck.

Kirishima panicked, grasping for air and letting his guard down. His hardening faltered and Bakugou noticed. He slashed across his chest again, droplets of blood splattering on the pavement.

Kirishima cried out before he could bite his tongue. Bakugou hissed and raised his claws once more, but it was Ashido who tackled him before he could tear Kirishima open some more.

The two rolled as they hit the ground. Bakugou landed first, his head and shoulder colliding with the ground hard, but he still found the strength to get back up. Ashido gave Kirishima a hand and asked, “What the hell happened to him?”

“Some lady’s quirk,” he explained. “She’s making people into monsters. I’m not sure why, but I get the feeling it’s probably a distraction. It wouldn’t be the first time a villain caused a commotion to distract the heroes while they’re off robbing a bank or something.”

“Aizawa’s almost here,” she stated. “We’ll need to catch this lady if we want to get Bakugou back, right? Aizawa will have to use his Erasure on her, and Bakugou should go back to normal again, don’t you think?”

Kirishima hadn’t thought about that. “Yeah, Mina, I think you’re right. You go ahead and find her! I can hold Bakugou off.”

She glanced at his chest, at the blood leaking down his stomach, and a look of concern passed over her features.

“I won’t let my guard down again,” he urged. “I won’t. This isn’t the Bakugou we know. He’s sloppy. It’s like he’s in some kind of, uh, animalistic rage? Yeah, he’s not thinking or calculating any of his movements, he’s just attacking. I can beat him now.”

She swallowed, but finally nodded just as Bakugou advanced again. Kirishima hardened and blocked before Ashido could get hurt. “Go! Find her!” he yelled.

“I don’t even know what she looks like!” Ashido called back.

Kirishima threw a leg up into Bakugou’s side, who didn’t see it coming. He stumbled, but it wouldn’t hold him off long. “She was maybe in her late twenties? Shoulder length brown hair, business casual clothes, and she had this wild look in her eyes. Trust me, you’ll recognize it when you see it.”

“Right! I’m on it,” Ashido shouted and ran off toward Uraraka and Midoriya, probably to fill them in on the situation.

Bakugou leapt with both claws outstretched, going in for another attempt to strangle him, but Kirishima saw it coming this time. He caught Bakugou by the wrists and swung him around into a wall hard. He felt bad doing this to his pal, who truly wasn’t in control of his actions, but he couldn’t just stand there as Bakugou’s personal punching bag until Aizawa showed up. A real hero would subdue Bakugou before helping the others. If Kirishima could at least hold him off long enough for the others to find the perp, he’d have done his part.

“Bakugou, listen,” Kirishima tried again, knowing it was no use. “Don’t do this. You’re the strongest guy I know, and I know you can fight this! Come back to me, man.”

He had Bakugou’s back pinned to the wall, holding him down by his wrists. Bakugou hissed, totally unlike himself. He snapped his sharp teeth at Kirishima, who bared his own.

“Bakugou, listen to me!” he said in his harshest tone, staring into the boy’s slit eyes. “You’re making a fool out of yourself. Fight this! You want to be the number one hero, don’t you? Then beat this!”

Bakugou slammed his eyes shut, and a jolt passed through his body. For a few short seconds, he didn’t fight Kirishima’s hold on him. The moment didn’t last long.

Bakugou lifted his legs and threw his feet against Kirishima’s chest, kicking him with enough force that the red-head went sailing into the street. He shot out of the way just in time to avoid being hit by a bus.

“Jeez, Bakugou! Harsh much?”

He jumped at Kirishima, who recognized the move all too well. He grabbed hold of Bakugou’s arm and elbow, then threw him over his shoulder and slammed him into the ground—a move Midoriya was well-known for.

Bakugou rolled onto his hands and knees, and Kirishima could see he was shaking, though he wasn’t sure if it was from pain or if maybe the boy was fighting the quirk. Kirishima’s heart sank a little when he climbed back to his feet, but Bakugou was visibly slower than a few moments ago.

“Ki—Kiri… gah,” Bakugou managed.

Kirishima smiled. He knew Bakugou was a fighter. “You can do it, dude! You’re the strongest guy I know. Keep fighting it!”

The blond took a hesitant step toward Kirishima, who didn’t back away. He was giving Bakugou the chance to restrain himself.

With his second step, his legs buckled and he fell to his knees. “Kirishima!” he gasped, clutching at his skull. “I—I can’t... It hurts, dammit!”

Kirishima couldn’t bare to watch his best friend suffer through this any longer. He hardened and rushed forward, sinking to Bakugou’s level and pulling him into a tight embrace.

“I’m here, Katsuki,” Kirishima whispered into his shoulder. “We can get through this.”

Kirishima felt a sob wrack Bakugou’s body, but the boy refused to let any tears fall. He wasn’t one to show weakness in front of his peers. Kirishima wasn’t an exception, but he would keep trying to get his closest friend to open up. Baby steps.

“Aizawa and the others are looking for the woman who did this to you right now,” Kirishima kept talking, thinking maybe that would help to calm Bakugou further. “He’ll use Erasure on her and you’ll be good as new. I promise.”

Kirishima wasn’t sure how long they sat like that, Bakugou trembling in his arms. He hoped his blond friend wouldn’t remember any of this. Bakugou would be so embarrassed. If there was anything the boy hated, it was showing weakness. Kirishima prayed Aizawa would manage to catch the woman who did this before the media found them. Bakugou had quite the reputation at this point, and he definitely wouldn’t want to be on the news looking like this.

“Awh! Look at you two lovebirds,” came Kaminari’s voice. Sero chuckled beside him. “Finally admitting your love for one another?”

“I hate to break up the bonding moment,” came Sero’s voice then, “but you know there’s a villain we’re after, right?”

Kirishima cringed when he felt Bakugou tense. He could only tighten his hold, hoping it would be enough to keep him at bay.

It wasn’t.

Bakugou shot out of his grip, Kirishima’s words lost to him. He raised his claws at the two boys, who’s faces dropped with realization.

Kirishima jumped onto Bakugou, wrapping his arms around him once more. He couldn’t let him hurt their friends. One wrong move on their part and he could actually kill them.

Kaminari must have panicked, because the next thing Kirishima knew, his entire body was filled with electricity. He could barely register the pain as the darkness creeping into his vision quickly swallowed him whole.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part 1 of 5 ?? Not sure yet but I’ll be quick with the updates eh

Read part 2 here

Read part 3 here

Read part 4 here

Read part 5 here

Read part 6 here

Thanks for reading ! Hope you enjoyed<3

8/18/2020

[jem-2096]

Brunette from Mars - (Peter Parker One shot)

Warnings: Swearing, mentions of fighting/abuse, FLUFFY AF! 

(This could be read as ftm!peterparker and/or regular MCU Peter Parker)

This one shot is inspired by the song mars by Yungblud. Go give it a listen if you haven't! 

You and the brunette haired boy with deep honey coloured irises quickly became good friends. You commuted to school each morning together after learning you lived in the same apartment in Queens while your first day of highschool in homeroom. You were paired for some lame icebreakers to get to know other students. He had nervously blabbed to you about how he had moved apartments with his aunt over the summer and as you got to know him better over time, he let you know the reason why they moved.

You quickly learned that the brunette was a great listener, quick witted, fairly thoughtful, determined with his studies, had a passion for tinkering with programming and computer tech and secretly kept a picture of Daisy Ridley as Rey from Star Wars in his desk that you won't let him live down. 

Two summers ago, the brunette had quite the glow up that to be honest made your stomach do flips. After returning from a trip to Detroit with his Aunt May to visit family, the brunette came back to school with his braces off and a nice build to him compared to the lanky string bean he was when he had left in that June. 

With this overnight glow up also came this new habit of him flaking on you and really everyone without reasonable explanations. He would come to school with bruised knuckles, scratches on his face, and more often than not bags under his eyes. Although he seemed exhausted, his smile and upbeat self usually didn't seem to waver. His eyes did however seem to say otherwise whenever his honey brown irises met yours. 

Unless he flaked on an important commitment, you didn't display emotions or words for his lack of presence. His world didn't revolve around you and you accepted that. You reminded yourself to try not to hold him back from what he loved because you were a good friend and wanted what was best for him, even if it was draining him. 

"I'm free to study for algebra after dinner tonight." You stated to the brunette, looking past him out the city bus window as the buildings, and trees whirled past you. You weren't looking for an answer at this point, just giving him an open invitation to come over if he had nothing better to do on his Thursday night. You saw him nod out of the corner of your eye as he leaned his head against the pole you both were holding onto and closed his eyes. The bus was quiet this morning as you watched the orange sunrise dance over the brunette's features and could hear the beat of whatever song he was listening to through his headphones. 

A GPS like voice came over the bus intercom as you turned the corner. "Grand Central Parkway at 65th Avenue". You pulled the chord on the side of the bus for the bus driver to stop and gently shook the brunette's shoulder. As you saw his honey coloured eyes once again, you nodded in the direction of the door for you to both get off. 

You were early to school today seeing as you made the transfer bus in time for the first time in forever. Walking through the dewy grass on the field together, you pointed at an open picnic table near the tennis courts. 

Setting your backpack down, you opened it grabbing out two granola bars and an apple. The brunette slumped down beside you to face away from the sun. As he set his coffee on the table, his head immediayley went into his folded arms. You placed one of the granola bars infront of him, and sat facing the courts. Stretched your legs out and crossing your ankles, you flipped through one of your novels, quickly finishing up your AP lit reading before class. 

"Thanks." You heard him pipe up in a monotone voice as he shoved the granola bar in his pocket. You nodded, nose still in your novel. He knew by now that he didn't have to put on an act around you. "We gotta go in, in 20. I'll wake you in 15, kay?" 

He nodded as his head was back in his arms, facing away from you. You heard him let out an audible sigh as you finished up the last of your notes. 

"Pete?" You ask hesitantly, resting your hand on his shoulder. He didn't respond. "You know, you can tell me anything right? I won't push you. The offer still stands. No judgement. Alright?" You say quietly, softly rubbing your hand down his jacket clad back and let it drop off to collect your things and pack up your bag. 

The alarm you set on your phone goes off as you see him prop his head up and wipe his eyes on his sleeve out of the corner of your eye.

'Oh Peter. Sometimes, as close as we are, I wish it didn't feel as though there was a cement wall between us.' You thought to yourself as you scrolled through your phone. As you both stood to walk up to the school, to your surprise, as cold and distant as he had been recently, he pulled you into his side. You wrapped your arms around his torso giving him a quick hug. 

After taking attendance in home room and catching up with MJ about her latest find in the school library, you were dismissed to your first period class. "Leave your window open at 6." You heard the brunette pipe up at your lockers. "Always." You nodded, giving him a small smile before parting ways to your classes. 

You quickly glanced at your alarm clock on your desk reading 8:30 pm. Quickly realizing you were running out of graph paper in your notebook as you flipped to a fresh page, you scribbled down the next practice question. Your headphones blasted one of your new favourite songs as you disconnected them from the bluetooth on your phone to play out loud. "Do you feel like your irrelevant, do you feel like your just scared as fuck.." You quietly sang along, writing a note to get more graph paper in the near future, as you heard a thud from the window beside you. 

Swiveling in your chair, you look up to see the silhouette of the brunette. As he steps into the light of your desk lamp and sits on your bed you can see his eyes are red and his knuckles are beginning to bruise again. He kicks off his sneakers as you hesitantly stand from your chair to go and to sit beside him. 

He immediately buries his face in his hands as he quietly cries. You try your best to not show the hurt on your face from seeing him like this as you gently rub his back. You go to sit behind him up against the wall. You bring your hands around his waist gently holding him, letting your legs dangle on either side of him and rest your head on his shoulder. 

When you no longer hear uneven breathing, you sit back up and one hand goes to the hair on the nape of his neck, softly playing with his locks, while the other gently rubs circles on his back. 

"I'm sorry." You hear him sigh out. "Im so fucking sorry." He pleads as he begins to cry again. "I'm here. Just breathe Pete." You say calmly as you wrap your legs around his waist and hug him tighter. You take deep breaths for him to mimic to try and calm him back down. 

"I keep fucking up Y/n/n, and I don't know what to do anymore." He painfully lets out. You take in his words and quickly think of an appropriate response. "Everyone I try to become close with has ended up hurt or passed away, I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders and have to fill his shoes. No matter what decisions I make I still always end up letting someone down. I'm just so fucking tired Y/n." Although his words are a jumbled mess to you, you nod. You let go of the tense brunette and sit beside him. "Take your shirt off and go lie on your stomach." You say to him as he looks at you somewhat confused but does as he's told and props his head up on his folded arms. 

You can see the faded scars and healed wounds on his arms, shoulders and back, wondering who gave these to him. As you sit straddling his waist, your hands go to his shoulders and back massaging his tense and knotted muscles. He lets out a big sigh of relief after realizing what's going on. He softly mewls as you gently work the knots out. Once all the tension in his back and shoulders is gone, you lay close beside the half awake brunette. 

"Thank you." He states sincerely, as he rolls to face you. You know that his words of gratitude are for more than just the back massage. You nod, reaching your hand up to run your hands softly through his locks to relax him further as his eyes flutter shut at your touch. "We're all only capable of so much Pete. Please, don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm. It's a hard pill to swallow but its impossible to win every battle and win everyone over. I know it's easier said than done, and it'll take some time to figure everything out, but I'll be here every step of the way though alright?" You whisper softly, and reach for his hand giving it a squeeze as he nods. "I'll let you get some rest." You sigh out, sitting up, bringing the blanket at the end of the bed over his larger frame and bend down giving a kiss to his temple. "Goodnight love." You whisper.

After another hour and a half of battling through algebra questions, you quietly change into some sweats and open up your netflix account to get your mind off your math problems and your worries of Peter. Picking up your laptop, your half empty waterbottle falls to the floor with a thud. Your gaze darts over to your bed to see the naturally curly headed brunette sound asleep. Your heart flutters as you catch him pull the covers up to his chin and nuzzle his nose into the pillow and blankets while he curls his legs up into the fetal position. You sit on the floor beside your bed as the light from the movie on netflix illuminates your bedroom. You have the subtitles on and the movie on the lowest volume as you rest your back against the bed frame. 

After a few minutes you begin to hear the brunette stir and roll over to face the movie. "Is this that BoxTrolls movie?" You hear him croak out in a deep voice that makes your heart flutter. "No, this one's Paranorman. It's in my top 5." You respond, your gaze still on the screen. You feel his fingers playing with the ends of your hair softly, trying his best not to disturb you even though you've seen this movie more times than you can remember. 

He pushes all of your hair over to one of your shoulders and rests his chin on the opposite one. "You know, you don't have to sit on the floor right? I don't bite Y/n." He states sleepily in your ear. You quickly catch your breath at how close he is as you comprehend the words coming out of his mouth and nod standing. You place your laptop on your desk chair and wheel it over in front of the bed. Looking over to the brunette laying confortably in your bed, he holds the blanket open for you to get in. "One sec." You say as you take off your hoodie, revealing your white tank top underneath that clung to the hills and slopes of your natural curves. You had ditched your bra long before the Brunette had arrived, remembering that it's laying in the clothes hamper and not on your body. You looked back down to see the brunette's arm still holding the blanket open, his honey eyes on you. They slowly wandered down your silhouette to see the loose sweatpants hung low on your hips and back up to meet your gaze. The dark room concealed the deep blush you felt on your cheeks from his gaze. 'Too late now..' you thought as you climbed under the blanket. Your back rested up against Peter's larger frame. His arm snaked around your waist, pulling you closer to him. "Is this okay y/n/n?" The brunette questioned. You nodded, trying your best to calm your breathing as you felt his warm, gentle touch on your skin. You hoped and prayed he couldn't hear your heartbeat pounding in your chest. 'I feel so safe and at home in his arms but the last thing he needs right now is a girlfriend. And why would he want to be with me anyways. We're just friends and he probably just needs physical affection from someone right now.' You thought to yourself. 

You let out a soft sigh at your thoughts. "You okay sweetheart?" He asks softly, as you feel his warm lips peck the back of your exposed neck. Your face is on fire at this point. 'He's just tired Y/n. Calm down. Dont say anthing stupid'  "Yeah, I just feel safe in your arms." You murmur loud enough for him to hear. 'Idiot. You ruined it. Shit shit shit.' 

It became deathly quiet between you two. You could hear his breathing, the rain hitting your bedroom window, the cars driving on the street below, your upstairs neighbour walking around their apartment and the dull volume of the movie playing from your laptop.

"Y/n/n?" You heard him whisper.  

You rolled over to face him, burying your face in his chest, breathing in his warm cologne and body wash as you wrapped your arm around his waist and tangled your legs in his. Although you didn't have all the answers you were looking for, this the closest you two had been in over a year and you were happy that he was finally starting to let down his walls. 

He stroked your hair, planting a kiss on the crown of your head. "Goodnight love." He mumbled before all the sounds around you in the silence of your bedroom coaxed you to sleep. 

You had woken up to your alarm at 6:30am to find the spot beside you empty. 

The brunette swore that was the best sleep he had had in months he thought, reminiscing as he climbed down the fire escape after quickly showering and getting ready to meet you before catching the bus. You heard a knock on your window before he slid it open and sat on the sil. He fiddled with tge metro card in his hands as a small smile crept onto his face watching you concentrating on finishing your eyeliner and mascara. You take a step back to look in the mirror to see if your wings are symmetrical, seeing the brunette looking at you with a sheepish grin in the reflection. He looked well rested for once, his eyes kind and soft, glancing at you in adoration. Your heart beats out of your chest as you spin around to look at him. 

"One sec." You say quickly rushing out to the kitchen to grab some food before packing up your bag. Pulling on your coat and beanie, as you walk towards the window sill the brunette is lounging on.

"Before we go, I uhm... forgot to tell you something.. last night." He says looking down at his hands as you reach out gently hold his larger ones. "Y/n.. I uhm-" he looks up at you, scanning your features, trying his best to read your emotions. You see him glance down quickly at your soft lips. 'I can't take this. Screw always being a good friend.' You thought as you leaned in, placing a hand on his cheek and a soft kiss to his lips. Your thumb stroked his cheek as he leaned back in for another. Your forehead rested against his. "Was that what you wanted to tell me?" You asked in a hushed tone, looking down at his lips again. He nodded before giving them another peck. "Uhm.. we better go before we-" "oh.. yeah, your right. Shit!" You say, quickly checking the time on your phone. 

As you dashed down the fire escape and towards the bus stop, his hand never left yours as you jogged behind him giggling at his antics of repeating "Shit" as he saw the bus waiting for you at your stop as you both jogged towards it. You couldn't see it but for the first time in a while, a genuine smile adorned the brunette's face and through whatever he was battling with, knowing you were by his side, there would be plenty more to come.