#funny how the first thing I show for this au doesn't actually have anything to do with the premise of it

[yestrday]

Any characters and au with M/C who has another stalker?? 🤨🤨🤨

i think it'd be funny to see this go down bc the yan would be like :000 someone else with loose and unethical morals! i need to protect my darling even though i pose an equal if not more dangerous threat to them! i love my hypocrites

you might like:

academy! mika starts panicking when he realizes that another freak has joined him on following your daily route throughout the academy. he starts rambling to his fellow first years about how worrying this is! and that they should— he should protect you! but he doesn't quite know how to go about confronting this stalker and he's worried that he might be overreacting that he might be just overthinking things. the others sit in amused silence. this isn't your first time having stalkers (bennett clamps razor's mouth before he can speak up about his own stalking), and the fact that your most obvious stalker is worrying about another is kind of funny.

the stakes are higher in the hybrid au, so obviously no stalker will be left untouched... or unhurt. as one of your most prominent shadows, hybrid! xiao can easily catch any rat trying to sneak up on you. your whole security team actually, but being one of the more powerful ones, xiao is usually the one to snatch them up. he doesn't take his time and already has a spear to the poor guy's neck, ready to behead them. the others have to stop him so that they can get some more intel about him. he's a bit huffy about letting dirt like that live for a bit longer, but he lets the others do their thing while his steely gaze is on the interrogated's head for the rest of the questioning.

househusband! kazuha gets pretty protective when a stalker shows up while he's... protecting you from afar. in fact, this entire situation just further cements how much you need his protection! he confronts your stalker with a gentle smile, pretty enough that they would've thought he was just some friendly passerby. but that all changes when kazuha has a sword to his neck and they start panicking because— who carries a sword in modern day teyvat?! and oh archons he feels his flesh splitting. kazuha's pretty merciless when it comes to anything that could pose a threat to you, and he does all this with his gentlemanly smile that you don't even notice the stench of blood when you come home to him and his cooking.

[melodic-haze]

REQUEST: A reader much more powerful than Arlecchino and not doing anything about it.. except in bed.

☆ — DEMO TRACK: sub!Arlecchino x dom!Reader

☆ — TYPE: NSFW

☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: Mention of bloodplay at the very end but like. Very minor. Otherwise there's nothing 🤷‍♀️

☆ — NOTES: I'M NEVER TOUCHING MY DRAFTS WHEN I JUST WOKE UP EVER AGAIN I'M SO SORRY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 this was kinda bad dawg am sorry 😞

☆ — PARTS: Part 1, Part 2 (you are here)

Tall AND powerful??? Ohhhh she's gonna die you KNOW I had to mix it hahaahahha powertrip goes CRAAAAZYYYYYY I have such a thing for it I'm gonna cry

Anyway ok so I would like to first state that extremely powerful chrs that don't actually do a lot w their power is like one of my top fav tropes it's so fucking funny 😭 like dawg you have the power to change the world wdym you're just gonna sit here like it's summer vacation (there's a reason why my Akivilicarnation au exists (even though I gotta work on it one way or another))

This is rather different from the stuff I usually write bc I usually write the reader as. Kinda weak for the sake of putting us all on a powerscale between the chr and our average strength as a human being omg bare with

Okay so. I do feel like she'd be a tad bit frustrated with you, at least at first. Like you could do so much more than what you're showing and yet here you are, not using your strength for important stuff? Lazy bitch, her children are much better than your example 💀 at least, that's her initial take, really

But give her a demonstration, both in a time of need and yk ☺️☺️☺️, and she'll soften up

Anyways it's just the fact that you're both tall AND powerful??? Nevermind her doing anything, she'll find herself dazedly thinking of the ways in which you can quite possibly manhandle her with such brazen 'disrespect'......and also? In the ways you two can actually COMPETE. Or well, 'compete', esp when she finds herself actually WANTING to lose for once. Crazy, how the great Knave would actually prefer to lose compared to the usual want to win against her opponent

You sighed, "I know we talked about it two days ago but do we have to? Really?"

"I would like to test you. Unless you would rather skip such pleasantries?"

"I don't think fighting until one of us surrenders counts as 'pleasantries'. Quite the opposite, actually."

While you've always known Arlecchino to constantly have a stony expression that doesn't usually change, you see the bright crosses of her eyes dim just a fraction, "So I suppose that's a no, then?"

"Well, now," you stepped back with an amused look on your face, getting into the fighting stance you're familiar with, "I didn't say that... Especially not when the reward is something I really want."

And she gains that glow once again as she brandishes her weapon with a fraction of a smile and.. something else much more heated behind those eyes of hers, "Do not get ahead of yourself, my beloved. The results have yet to be concluded."

..She speaks as if she hadn't actually wanted to lose. Laughable, really.

(You know from the way that at the end of it all, she lies underneath you as her eyes scan you with that same heated look in her eyes—lust, a sin in which The Knave hadn't thought of ever committing.. until you came along.)

The whole thing about her being able to reverse your positions? THROW THAT TO THE FUCKING WIND IN THIS SITUATION you can easily EASILY fold her without a care in the world. The fact that she KNOWS you can too gives her a rush she hasn't ever felt without that extra layer of threatened rage

Push her up against the wall, hold her up in the air, pin her down so she can't squirm away..........if you're much more powerful than her, she actually makes a show of 'trying' to escape you. Keyword: 'trying', especially when at the end of the day she resigned herself to losing already

She tells you not to hold anything back, no matter how cautious you are. She says she can handle it, that she isn't strong without reason, that she can endure whatever you give her, no matter what. Usually she kinda ends up forgetting anything she's said though, especially when you're fucking her SOOO hard she starts seeing stars behind her eyes

If your strength applies to endurance too??? Ohhh bye she's not lasting. Like okay she definitely has stamina and endurance but against you? SHE'S QUITE LITERALLY DWARFED....BYE.........

In some way, she actually likes the fact that you don't show your power other than in private with just the two of you—it makes her feel special, to know exactly what you're capable of. Dare I even say she's a tad bit possessive over every side of you? Who can say 😜

Just think that whenever she kinda stands beside you in public w her heels on, she's very very VERY easily reminded of the fact that you tower over her in height, capability AND position.......and really, in comparison to what everyone else may think? Arlecchino wouldn't have it any other way 🫶

....oh side note, just think about how rough you can go, biting each other to the point where you draw blood. Sorry I had to get that final bit out ANYWAY

[boxofbonesfic]

omg i would love a dark!Peter or a Ransom prompt 👀 it can just be an idea, or a specific scene or scenario, whatever strikes your fancy 💖

Ok! Ransom x plus size reader: college au, fwb. Ransom doesn't want to be seen with her cause she's fat and she's cool with it cause she's literally just here for the d while she gets her degree right? Ransom's an ass but that dick is bomb and no feelings are involved so perfect. But then Ransom gets addicted to the p and wants her all to himself, still on the dl tho. His changing feelings don't come out till she meets someone and breaks it off with Ransom. Reader doesn't think anything of it but Ransom COMPLETELY loses his mind and starts stalking her, blowing up her phone, etc. Not caring if everyone knows now. Reader is CONFUSED and MIFFED!

Title: Breaking

Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x Plus Size!Reader

Word Count: 5,374

Summary: Ransom wasn’t eager to stake any sort of claim on you—until someone else does it first.

Warnings: College AU, Stalking, Kidnapping, Darkfic, Plus Size Reader, Manipulation, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, MINORS DNI!

A/N: thank you so much for this lovely prompt! i really hope you enjoy this little ficlet. ❤️ divider by @firefly-graphics

Ransom had found it kind of funny at first, when you’d stopped responding to his rather crassly worded “U up?” texts. It wasn’t until the third text in half as many weeks had gone completely unanswered that he’d tried calling instead—and found you had blocked him completely. 

What?

That wasn’t like you. Not like Ransom had taken time to really know you, but ghosting just didn’t seem like it belonged in your playbook.

“The number you have dialed cannot be reached at this time. Please contact your service provider if you believe you have reached this message in error.”

It had taken a little finesse, Ransom laying the charm rather thickly on your friend in his business management class, the one whose name he could never remember. 

“She has a boyfriend,” she’d said, twisting a lock of her hair around her finger with a nervous giggle. “But I’m, um, single.”

Which brings him to now.

You weren’t the sort of girl he usually took out on dates, and, looking back on it, you’d picked it up rather quickly. Your requests to meet at parties or the bars his frat brothers regularly visited were answered with vague no’s. Or, more often than not, ignored outright until you stopped sending them. It wasn’t your fault—he had a reputation to think about. Though tonight, ironically, his reputation is the furthest thing from his mind. 

What is on his mind, is you. 

Ransom’s lip curls as he watches Isaac drape an arm across your shoulders, squeeing affectionately. He doesn’t know him well—they haven’t spoken much beyond the idle chit-chat around the keg. It turns his stomach, the thought that he’d finally realized just how much you meant to him, only to have this—this boy-scout steal you from right under his nose. Out from his fucking bed. 

Ransom isn’t used to coming in second place. It’s never happened before, losing something he actually wants. Isaac seems happy to be next to you, not embarrassed or hiding behind baseball caps and wide sunglasses. Not like Ransom. He’s angry—at you, a little, but mostly at himself. It’s not hard to recall how you felt underneath him, all soft skin, soft curves, and fuck. He hates himself for not savoring that last time more, for not knowing it was going to be the last time. 

This wasn’t how things were supposed to go. Ransom Drysdale didn’t get dumped—he was the one who did the dumping. And, he, thinks with no small amount of derision as he watches you from across the bar, I didn’t get dumped. We were never together. You can’t break up if you’re not together. The thought rings hollow even in his own head as he nurses his fifth beer of the night. It feels stupid-no, superficial, now; the way he’d only drop by your dorm-room after midnight, showing up without calling or texting and knowing full well that you would let him in. 

But not anymore. 

You’re too far away for him to hear it, but when you laugh, you tilt your head back, attempting to cover your wide grin with one hand. Pretty, he thins to himself, taking another long swallow from the bottle. Fuck how had he not noticed how pretty you are when you laugh, before? Had he just never seen it? Now that it occurs to him, Ransom’s hard pressed to find a memory that isn’t just sweaty skin, and hungry words growled into the curls at the nape of your neck.  

Fuck.  

Those were his favorite nights, the ones he spent digging his fingers into the softness of your hips while he sank in to the hilt—Ransom shudders. Even through the condoms you insisted he wear, the memory of your slick, tight heat is enough to send a hot, jealous pulse through his veins. 

“We’re not together,” you’d said, crossing your arms stoutly as you stared up at him. “Condom or nothing.”

Probably doesn’t make Isaac wear a fucking condom. He takes another bitter swallow. He doesn’t know what’s worse, the thought of you fucking that Leave it To Beaver reject, or you fucking him raw. Both make him see red. 

“Right, Ransom?” Someone claps him on the shoulder, and Ransom nods wordlessly. He isn’t paying attention, not to them, not with you here. You lean over to say something to your friend, the same mousy one who’d volunteered herself in your place. Ransom scoffs into his beer. 

“Three fucking weeks.” He mumbles, draining the bottle before placing it down almost too hard on the bar-top. “How’s it get serious in three fucking weeks?” He waves at the bartender, signaling for another. 

“Ran, we’re heading out.” Theo jerks his head towards the door. “There’s a party at Jude’s place. Hella girls.” He waggles his eyebrows. “Drunk ones.” 

Ransom shrugs bad-naturedly, grimacing. “I’m going to stay here,” he says evasively, casting another sour look at you as his lip curls. “I don’t feel like pulling your head out of the toilet tonight.” 

“Whatever, man.” Theo rolls his eyes, squaring his shoulders. He follows Ransom’s eye across the bar, and smirks. “Just because you’re not getting your dick wet with your porky little sidepiece anymore doesn’t mean the rest of us have to stay here and mope with you all weekend.” 

Maybe it’s the alcohol warming his gut, but Ransom’s up before he’s really got a chance to think about it, his hands on Theo’s shoulders as he shoves him backwards, hard. The other man stumbles backward, and Ransom squares his shoulders. 

“Don’t fucking talk about her like that.”

“What, now you care, all of a sudden?” Theo scoffs. “Dude you wouldn’t even let her come in through the front door—” 

Ransom doesn’t know when exactly he grabbed a handful of Theo’s thin hair, holding his head still while he drives a frenzied fist into his former friend’s face as everyone watches. He comes to as he rears his fist back again, the sound of his name distant in his ears, like it was spoken through glass. 

“Ransom!” Your confused face in the crowd is all he can see—which is why Theo’s sucker punch catches him off guard. It makes his ears ring as stars explode in his right eye. The world tilts as Ransom stumbles, and the television static in his ears is replaced by yelling. The warm wet trickle from his nose is blood, staining the tips of his fingers red as he holds his face. Theo’s not doing much better, blood pouring from his nose, and an ugly, swollen bruise coming to bear on the right side of his face. 

“Fuck you,” Theo mumbles, drawing the back of his sleeve across his bloody lip. “Fucking asshole.” He storms out, a few of their frat brothers trailing behind him as he goes. 

“Are you fucking serious?” The bartender throws down the towel in his hands, before smacking them against the bar-top. “I’ve fucking told you guys about bringing that bullshit in here—”

“I was just leaving,” Ransom snaps, shoving his hands into his pockets. He hates that he can feel your eyes on him too; watchful, judging. Theo’s gone by the time Ransom makes his way outside. It’s almost winter break, and the icy night air feels good against the hot, painful throbbing in his cheek. 

“Ransom.” He turns, scowling at you over his shoulder. “What the fuck was that?” He shrugs miserably. 

“Nothing.” 

“It didn’t look like nothing.”

“What do you fucking care?” The venom on his tongue flows easily, likely aided by the liquid courage currently sloshing around in his gut. “You blocked me. You have a boyfriend.” He doesn’t know what he’s expecting from this confrontation, but your distinct lack of a reaction feels like more of a slap in the face than anything else. You blink at him, one eyebrow quirked as if in question. 

“Yeah, I did.” Why does it hurt? Ransom’s rejected hundreds of girls—some as he was fucking pulling out of them, so why does this feel like a fucking knife in his back? “I figured you wouldn’t care much, Ransom, considering.” He hates this, hates how he’s the angry one and you’re calm—the roles should be reversed. They would be, if not for that niggling, irritating feeling that you should be his, just his. He doesn’t want to admit that you’re right, that you’ve got him pegged dead to fucking rights.

“How would you know?”

“You don’t sneak girls you like in through the basement entrance.” You retort smoothly. You’ve had a lifetime of this, of learning to live in your body, of learning to weather other people’s reactions to it—it’s Ransom that’s unfamiliar with rejection, unsure of how to handle the fact that the “r-train” isn’t enough to keep you coming back for more despite his treatment. 

“But I do. I do like you.” He says, running a hand through his hair. “Don’t do this. It doesn’t have to be a thing. We can just, we can go back to how it was before.” This time, you do react, your face screwing up as you regard him first with disbelief and then anger. 

“Why would I give up being in a relationship with someone who actually likes me, who is willing to be seen with me in public places and with his friends— you know what? I don’t need this.” You mutter, pinching the bridge of your nose. “This is what I fucking get for trying to make sure you’re okay. Silly me. I thought we were mature, here.” You gesture between the two of you before another dry laugh bubbles out from between your lips. 

“Have a good night, Ransom.”

No, no, don’t leave! The desperate thought makes his throat tight. You can’t leave me. He stumbles exaggeratedly as you watch, falling against the bus stop with a groan. The plan lays itself out before him neatly like lines on a map. 

“God fucking dammit—Ransom!” You huff irritatedly. He leans against the pole, counting the seconds until you come over to check on him. You do, and he moans pitifully. “Can you walk?” 

“No,” he hiccoughs, swaying cartoonishly as you try to help him stand. “Ju-hic-just go. I’ll be fine.” You blow an exasperated breath out as you straighten him up. She doesn’t talk to her parents. He licks his lips as you pull out your phone, holding it up to your ear as you wait for someone to answer on the other end. She told me that when we were smoking, that one time. 

“I obviously can’t. How did you get here?” You say, holding your hand over the mouthpiece as you scowl up at him. 

“Theo d-drove.” The house is only a ten minute drive from here. Fifteen, tops.

“Yeah, I’m just going to head back to campus. No, I’m gonna take an uber. Yeah, I’ll see you tomorrow, Isaac.” The little smile that curls at the corners of your lips makes him sick. “Yeah, you too.” Ransom leans on you heavily, and you don’t seem to notice when he presses his face into your hair, inhaling the scent of your shampoo with relish. Fucking Isaac.

“I’ll get the uber,” he says, slurring the words deliberately as he fumbles with his own phone. “M’sorry, Princess.” He taps the screen clumsily, selecting Home instead of Dorm, before hastily stowing it back in his pocket.

“Don’t call me that.” You snap sharply. You try—and fail—to stand Ransom on his own two feet. Instead he hangs over you, draped over your shoulders with his chin resting on the top of your head.

“Why?” The question comes out petulantly. “You used to like it.” 

“Stop.” 

The familiar feel of your body pressed against his is sweet in a way Ransom hadn’t anticipated. The attic’s secure. Quiet. 

When the car pulls up, Ransom allows you to wrangle him into the back seat, where he sprawls across your lap when you sit down beside him. You don’t say anything to the driver beyond a mumbled hello, which suits him just fine. Ransom plays up the drunk act, asking the driver a nonsensical question that makes you whisper at him to be quite. 

“Sorry. Just trying to get him home.” You reply, pushing uselessly at his head as he settles into your lap. Soft. He can’t help but run a reverent hand across your jean clad thigh. Love how soft she is.

You’re so distracted trying to keep him from getting comfortable that you don’t notice the cab is heading away from the dorm until the driver turns down the private road. 

“Wait—wait, I think you made a wrong turn somewhere,” you say, leaning forward to talk to the driver. He shakes his head enthusiastically, and points at his phone’s GPS. 

“No, I followed the directions,” he protests, and Ransom hides his snicker in a groan. “This is the address.” 

You lean back with a dissatisfied sigh, and look down at Ransom. 

“Let me see your phone.” He unlocks it and hands it over, his face a mask of innocence. You notice the mistake immediately, leaning forward again. “Could you turn around and take us back to Harvard campus, please—”

“This trip was already way out of my route,” the driver grouses, frowning at the two of you in the mirror. “And I don’t think he’ll make another trip. Looks like he’s about to puke any second.” 

“He’s fine.” 

Ransom retches, and watches as the cabby’s face twists angrily. 

“He’s not! I’m sorry, I’m done for the night. Maybe someone else will be able to pick you up.”

The finality in his voice makes Ransom giddy, and he clutches his stomach, gagging. He’s never thrown up—he’s not a fucking freshman lightweight, he’s a fucking Sigma for chrissakes—but he’s willing to let the two of you believe he might. You bite your lip, teeth sinking into its pillow softness as you try to undo what Ransom’s done. 

“M’sorry. Didn’ mean to put in the wrong hic place.”

You nod stiffly. “I know. I guess… Well, this place has plenty of couches, right?” There’s little humor in your joke, but Ransom makes sure to laugh a little anyway, nodding. 

“My grandfather won’t mind if you sleep in one of the guest rooms. Promise, Princess.” 

“Ransom, don’t—”

“We’re here.” The driver cuts in as the car pulls to a stop in front of the house. “Sounds like you guys have it all figured out.” 

—

As expected, the only people home are his grandfather, along with a few odd members of the staff. They’re easy enough to convince, Fran and Marta ferrying him upstairs to his room while he mumbles incoherently. You help too, tugging the blanket up over him after pulling off his shoes with a grunt. It feels nice, having you care for him like this, your soft hands on his face. 

It feels right. 

“I’ll get the guest room set up for you upstairs,” Fran says on her way out. “I’ve got a t-shirt around here somewhere.” Ransom doesn’t catch your answer, but that doesn’t matter much, not when he knows where you’ll be. It’s strange, how he’s impatient now, here at the home stretch, but he is. The smell of you, the taste, the feel, it’s all he can think about now that he’s so close.

It won’t be easy keeping you, he knows that, but nothing good comes without a challenge, right? And with the right motivation, Ransom knows he can make you fall in line. The house quiets around him, and distantly, he hears the sound of first Fran’s car, and then Marta’s. He forces himself to wait a few minutes more, and when he emerges out into the still air of the hallway, he smiles. 

The door to the guest room is ever so slightly ajar, and Ransom slides inside. You sit up sharply, and for a moment only sound between you is the quiet settling of the house. 

“What are you doing?”

“I came to check on you.” He can’t see your face in the dark, but he can see the shape of you, silhouetted in the pale beam of light streaming in from the tiny window above the bed. 

“I’m fine.” The words are stiff. “You should go to bed.” 

He doesn’t. Instead, Ransom turns and closes the door securely behind him, slipping the key into his pocket. The sound is deafening in the quiet, and he knows you hear it too. 

“Have you texted Isaac, yet?” He asks, cocking his head. The room is small, shaped oddly by the sloping roof, and Ransom himself takes up the bulk of it standing in front of the door. You seem to shrink a little in response, and your hesitation answers the question truthfully, before you’ve even spoken. 

“Y-yes. You should go to—” The way your hand strays under the pillow to feel for your phone tells him the opposite. Ransom licks his lips. 

“Have you fucked him yet, Princess?”

Your gasp is audible. 

“Don’t—don’t call me that. Ransom go to bed. You’re drunk.”

“Have you fucked him?” He repeats it, dropping to his knees on the bed.

“Get out!” You make for the door too late, and Ransom grabs you, wrapping an arm securely around your waist as he breathes a relieved sigh into your bare shoulder. Your frustrated struggle turns panicked at the sound of metal clacking against metal. “No, Ransom no—” The handcuffs he produces from his pocket aren’t the padded ones he’s used with you before—these are the real deal, and he clamps them tightly around your left wrist, looping it around the bed-frame before capturing your right. You’re writhing and fighting, but it’s easy to ignore the pain as he locks his arms tight, waiting for you to tire yourself out. 

You’re wearing just a t-shirt, and Ransom palms the heavy weight of your tits through the soft cotton with a soft groan.

“So you haven’t fucked him.” 

You open your mouth to scream, and Ransom laughs. 

“Nearest person is two floors down, Princess,” he breathes, a low,  satisfied hum rumbling in his chest as he draws his fingers through your messy hair, before tangling his fingers in it to tug your head back. His teeth scrape at your throat. “You can scream if you want to,” he mumbles against your pulse. “You know I like it when you’re loud.” 

“Ransom, stop. You’re—”

“Drunk?” He answers smartly, before shaking his head. He cups your face with one sure hand, stroking your lip with the pad of his thumb. “I know you feel bad, Princess. You let me fuck that juicy cunt so quick, you thought you needed to make him work for it.” This close he can see your face, can see the guilt you quickly try to bury because he’s right. The answer is there, written in the way you turn your head away from him, trying to hide your face in shadow. Ransom doesn’t let you, squeezing your cheeks between his fingers as he forces you to stay still, to look him in the eye. 

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” You spit hoarsely, and Ransom laughs. “You’re fucking drunk and-and—get off me!” You shrill, bucking against him uselessly. If he’s drunk, that’s what he’s drunk on; the heady sensation of knowing the truth with absolute certainty. 

“I know exactly what I’m talking about.” He sneers, pressing you down into the mattress. The smell of your skin is intoxicating, like orange blossoms and fucking sunshine. “Fuck, Princess, I missed this.” It’s almost reverent, the way he slides his hands down over your hips, slowly working a knee between your stubborn thighs. Your borrowed t-shirt rolls up as Ransom spreads your legs, grinning at the sight of white lace between them.

He draws a finger over the curve of your cunt before cupping it. 

“Why’d you block me, Sweetheart?” He asks, tracing the shape of your puffy lips through the cotton. 

“You didn’t want me!” You hiss through clenched teeth. Ransom clucks his tongue at you, shaking his head, before delivering a stinging slap to your cunt. You feel it through the cotton, of course, whining and writhing underneath him as you cry out. “You’re fucking crazy—” The palm of his hand cracks sharply against you again, and it cuts your complaint short as the words disappear in a pained gasp. 

“Be honest with me, Princess.” He says, grinning as you try to wriggle away from him.

“You wouldn’t even be seen with me!” Your voice cracks. “It’s not fair, Ransom!”

“You want me to stake a claim, Sweetheart? I can do that,” Ransom breathes, pushing the shirt up over your breasts, groaning at the sight of your puffy nipples. He draws his thumb across one, watching, enraptured, as the flesh pebbles underneath his touch. He trails sloppy, heated kisses up the side of your throat, nipping at the skin until you whimper. He mouths at your skin, sucking at the purpling bruise until he pulls away, satisfied. 

“We can think of a more permanent solution later.” He leans back with a satisfied sigh. It feels good to mark you, to watch the bruises spread like ink on your pretty skin. 

“Please, Ransom, just go!” You sob, the chain rattling against the bed-frame as you try unsuccessfully to loose yourself from your restraints. “We-we’ll just pretend it never happened!” You nod at him, like you’re trying to encourage him to do the same, your wide eyes fever bright. “It’ll be just like before—”

“Why would I want that?” He asks, reaching down to tug your panties tight, pulling the fabric tautly through the lips of your pussy like dental floss. “I don’t think you’re really grasping the situation, Princess, so let me spell it out for you.” Ransom spreads your legs wider as you stare up at him with fearful eyes. 

“I don’t want things how they were before.” He snarls. “Things are different now, Sweetheart. You made them different.” Ransom slips his fingers underneath the elastic of your panties, and begins tugging them own your thighs, ignoring your whimpered pleas to wait and stop. You kick at him, a frenzied wail working its way out of your throat. True to his word, he ignores it, sliding down your body until he’s faced with the slick patch between your thighs. 

“Ransom—” His name is a hoarse wail as he attaches his lips to your cunt, his tongue seeking out your traitorously swelling clit. He grins against you, dragging his tongue noisily through your folds, moaning. This is perfection, he muses dimly, lapping at you as you whine. You can’t deny how good it feels, not when he can see the evidence glistening on your quaking thighs, taste it on his tongue. You’re gasping, those precious little choking noises filling his ears as you try to swallow down the sound of your pleasure.  

“Can’t fucking get over how good you taste, Princess,” he mumbles, reveling in your yelp as he sucks harshly on your swollen bud, spreading you wide with his fingers. You shake, your body jackknifing as you murmur nonsensically. He’s always loved that flavor—like fresh peaches, why do you taste like fucking peaches—

“F-Fuck you!” He doesn’t let you cum, though, pulling away to flick softly at your clit with his thumb. He draws the back of his hand across his mouth, wiping away the evidence of your body’s betrayal with a sly smile. A hoarse little whimper escapes you, and Ransom clucks his tongue, before reaching down to palm himself through his sweats. His cock his hard, so hard it almost hurts, thick drops of precum gathering at the reddened tip. He reaches for his phone with the other hand, the shutter noise clicking as he snaps a few pictures of your tear-stained face. 

“N-no, no—!” You voice your displeasure with a whine as Ransom pans the camera down your body, like he’s trying to map it out for posterity’s sake. “No pictures, please, please!” Your wild, watery eyes are frantic as you plead with him. “Please don’t, Ran, please don’t send those—” A hot pulse shoots through his body at your desperation, and his cock throbs. 

“A minute ago you were just telling me to go fuck myself.” He quirks an eyebrow at you over the top of the phone. “So which is it?”

“Please don’t send those.” You swallow thickly, the sound audible. “Please.”

He has no intention of sending them anywhere—except maybe to Isaac with your face cropped out, of course. But he smiles lasciviously anyway, blue eyes narrowing. Ransom runs his tongue across his lips, still tasting you on them.

“Let’s make a little deal, then.” He tugs his sweats down, and the fat, veiny length of his cock springs out. Ransom hisses softly as he spreads a sticky drop of precum across his tip with his thumb. “You’re going to end it with Isaac.” You open your mouth to complain, but Ransom forges ahead, ignoring you. “We’ll be exclusive, you and me, Princess.” He forces your thighs open a little wider. “Just like you want.” Ransom’s practically giddy with the thrill of it as your full lips begin to tremble and fresh tears track down your cheeks.

“I—I don’t want you!” You gasp, your attempts to buck him off only succeeding in wedging him further between your frantically kicking legs. Ransom clucks his tongue at you. 

“I don’t know about that, Princess,” he says, slapping a hand against your swollen cunt, cupping it roughly. You squeal as he draws a finger through your slick, still throbbing folds. 

“Not sure if you’ve ever been wetter.” Ransom presses your thighs to your chest. He asks, licking his lips. “It’s all up to you, of course.” Ransom lies so easily it doesn’t even really occur to him that he’s doing it. 

“You tell me to go, I’ll go. But I can’t say what’ll happen to that footage.” He shrugs. He’s got no intention of leaving this room, not really, but he doesn’t mind pretending. “But if you were my girl, I might be able to swing deleting it. After all, what would I need it for? Got the real thing all to myself.” He dips the tip of a thick finger into your entrance. “Get it, Princess? No more scholarship. No more shitty dorm-room. I’ll take care of you.”

You’re so easy to read like this, your guard down and your desperation front and center. He can see you weighing the options, trying to parse out the best win for yourself in this devil’s bargain. He can see you testing the weight of your future against the events of this evening, and coming up far short. Ransom’s not stupid—and neither are you. You know what happens to girls like you when these things make their way into campus chatrooms and local reddit pages. 

“You’ll really delete them?” You ask meekly, your mouth trembling. “You won’t… you won’t show these to anyone?” Ransom grins wider, drawing an X across his heart with the tip of his index finger. 

“Cross my heart.” Ransom steadies one hand against your hip, his fingers sinking into the soft curve of it as he aligns himself with your entrance. His eyes roll as the head of his cock meets your cunt with a lewd, wet squelch. He’s getting impatient—after all, it’s been more than two weeks since the last time he’s been inside you, and his cock twitches hard against you at the thought. 

“Okay.”

“I’m sorry Princess, you’ll need to speak up.” Ransom leans down over you, his hard eyes locked on yours. “Again.” 

“I said fine!” Your quiet voice is strained. “Fine. I’ll—I’ll break up with Isaac—”  Ransom kisses you, swallowing the rest of your words eagerly. He gorges himself on your mouth, sucking your tongue fiercely before pulling away to worry at your lower lip with his teeth until it’s swollen and red. 

“Oh Princess.” He breathes. “You don’t know how happy I am to hear that.”  He watches with dark glee when your eyes go wide as he begins to press into you, the head of his cock forcing you open. “No condom this time, but that’s alright, isn’t it?”

“Ransom!”

“M’right here,” he breathes, his hips jerking as your slick, puffy cunt sucks at his tip. “Fuck.” Ransom watches your eyes roll as you sink your teeth into your lower lip.  “I know you missed it too, Sweetheart,” Ransom grits the words out through his teeth as he sinks in, his toes curling as your wet heat envelops him inch by precious inch. “You can admit it.” 

The warm euphoria that spreads down his spine as he bottoms out draws another curse from his lips. You feel like fucking slick velvet inside, your walls clamping down on the girth of his cock like a wet fist. It’s hypnotic, pulling out only to thrust home again, his ears barely registering the groan of the bed-frame beneath you. The space between his temples is buzzing—your compliance, the feel of you around him, the knowledge that he’d won—Ransom’s delirious with it. 

What’s even better is he can see it, plain on your face how much you’re enjoying it—how much you hate yourself for it. It makes every mumbled curse, every moan he wrenches from your unwilling throat all the sweeter. Ransom clucks his tongue at you as he leans down to capture your lips again. They’re pillow soft and swollen from his teeth. 

“It’s my fault.” Ransom drives his cock into you, groaning. “I was stupid, Princess, I know. But I know what I need, now,” he says, hooking an arm beneath your thigh, lifting it so he can sink in even deeper. “Just you.” The shameful little wail that escapes your throat as you clamp down around him is almost enough to make him cum with you, cursing and crying as you do. He hangs on by the last fraying thread of his self control. 

“Shit, shit, shit—”

“See?” He laughs, rolling his hips into yours with heavy strokes. “You need me, too.” 

God, he loves seeing you like this, loves being the one to break you apart—loves knowing he’ll be the only one. It’s that thought that does it, aided by the miserable way you mewl his name as you cum again. His hands are tight on your hips, sinking into the heavy curve of them as he growls your name roughly in your ear. For a moment he’s lost in it; his forehead resting against yours as you milk him. 

He stays inside you for a few luxurious minutes, basking in the feel of your cunt before pulling out. Ransom slaps his still hard cock against your oversensitive clit and you whine, your hips jerking. He can’t help but admire the mess he’s made, dragging his tip through your slick, sticky folds. 

You watch him with red-rimmed eyes, your brows furrowing as he rises from the bed, pulling his sweats back up over his hips. He doesn’t reach for the keys, but instead slides his hand underneath your pillow to remove your phone. 

“Ransom let me out, now.” Your voice is high, panicked. “You promised—”

“To delete the pictures.” He finishes, nodding. As you sputter, he removes his own phone from his pocket, and faces the screen towards you as he selects the pictures and videos from the photo album, and there’s a swooshing sound from the phone’s speakers as they disappear. “And I’ve deleted them.” Frantically, you rattle the handcuff chains against the bed-frame, trying desperately to dislodge them as Ransom sighs. 

“You’re just going to hurt yourself.” You keep trying anyway, ignoring him your terrified sobs grow louder. 

“Let me go! You fucking promised, Ransom, don’t leave me here—”

He cocks his head at you. 

“Why would I leave you?” He asks, slipping both your phones into his pocket as he stands, stretching. “Winter break’s just starting,” Ransom says with a smile. “And I can’t think of a better way to spend it.” 

the end

Thank you for reading! Please check out my masterlist for other, similar works, and follow my library blog, @box-of-bones-library for updates. ❤️

[sweet-evie]

Head empty... Just having thoughts of an AU centered around Apartment Ghost!Gojo... 👻👻👻 So take my imagines...

✨ masterlist ✨

»» Ghost!Gojo = Casper the Friendly Ghost... It doesn't stop him from being a fucking menace day in and day out though.

»» Ghost!Gojo has been dead and buried for 6 months.

»» Ghost!Gojo haunts an apartment occupied by a single mom with two kids: one elementary kid and a toddler.

»» Imagine how fucking creepy and unsettling it is to find your toddler talking to empty air, and when you ask them, they look back at you with big innocent eyes and that big cheeky grin, and they start babbling about their "imaginary friend".

»» Creepy, but the mom dismisses it at first, chalking it up to childish imagination running wild, but when the older sibling casually asks about a tall white-haired man hanging around the apartment living room at dinner, Mom is starting to get concerned. Couple this with the fact that her toddler is giggling at odd hours during the night, while the room is empty. 

»» Eventually, Ghost!Gojo makes his presence known to the mom... And he's all smiles and being his usual goofy self while he's waving -- as if it isn't unsettling to have a dead fucking person hanging out in your home.

»» It took a while, but I like to think, the mom warms up to Ghost!Gojo being around after a couple of months. He doesn't show himself frequently to Mom because he freaks her out, but it doesn't stop Ghost!Gojo from being her toddler's playmate and her older kid's study buddy.

»» As time passed, they got so comfortable living with the ghost that mom and her kids forget that Ghost!Gojo is not actually alive and he doesn't show himself to other people, except for them.

»» After they get so used to him and comfortable with him being around, think of Ghost!Gojo as a very very friendly and chaotic poltergeist. He doesn't destroy things (at least when he does, he doesn't mean to). He's very nice... He just does annoying shit. For instance...

»» Ghost!Gojo likes to dig around the kitchen cupboards for candy and leaves the doors open just to annoy the older sibling and leave the mom exasperated. They leave out a bowl of candy for him in the living room after that, hoping it would discourage his behavior, but nope... It's still Gojo, and he does what he wants.

»» Ghost!Gojo also pranks the mom and moves things around in the kitchen to confuse her. The first time he did it, she got scared. A few more times, she got so annoyed. But after like the umpteenth time, the mom just rolls her eyes, like, "Haha, very funny, Satoru! I'm getting stuff from the laundry room, and this kitchen better be sorted when I get back."

»» Mom has definitely threatened to call 'ghostbusters' on Satoru's ass multiple times, and Gojo thinks it's hilarious. She never actually does anything to drive him away. To be honest, she quite likes the fact that her kids have a babysitter when she has to work late... Even if said babysitter is a wandering spirit.

»» On that note, Ghost!Gojo takes his babysitting duties seriously, and proclaims himself the best babysitter ever!

»» Ghost!Gojo does all the typical things people do to entertain toddlers. He talks to her toddler, entertains them, makes them laugh, tickles them, slips candies in their lap, picks up toys and disappears from view to give the toddler a fun puppet show -- with all the floating toys and shit.

»» The older sibling actually saw him doing this one time when they slipped into their younger sibling's room, and they just had to laugh, because who would have thought their family of three would be lucky enough to move into an apartment haunted by a very friendly ghost.

»» Ghost!Gojo helps mom cook sometimes, fetching her ingredients from the pantry and stuff. If a normal person were in that kitchen, all they would see are floating ingredients. It's enough to give anyone a heart attack, but for mom and her 2 kids, it's just Satoru.

»» One time, the older sibling invited their friends over and one of their friends got the idea to play with a Ouija board after the older sibling joked about the apartment being haunted.

»» They play with the ouija board, and Satoru plays into it for fun. Pre-teen kid's friends are terrified, but the pre-teen kid is amused as hell, because they know it's just Gojo.

»» When the friends go home, they tell the pre-teen kid about how much fun they had, and pre-teen kid thanks Ghost!Gojo for being kind enough to play along.

»» Ghost!Gojo has a habit of collecting coins.

»» Ghost!Gojo has never actually tried leaving the confines of the apartment before, but the pre-teen kid asks and they actually figure it out together.

»» They had so much fun doing it too... Ghost!Gojo figures out a way to possess random objects so the pre-teen kid can take him anywhere.

»» That being said, Ghost!Gojo has possessed the most ridiculous things. Think Ghost!Gojo possessing laundry detergent, the coffee table, the toilet paper, etc. He possessed the oven once and it broke, and the mom got so mad, so Ghost!Gojo steers clear of possessing electronic devices from then on.

»» Ghost!Gojo helps the kids surprise their mom during holidays... e.g., Mother's Day, Christmas, etc. For obvious reason, the family starts loving Halloween, because Ghost!Gojo loves it so much.

»» The toddler starts calling Ghost!Gojo 'Papa'.

»» It warms moms heart and hurts her at the same time. 

»» Because Satoru Gojo would have made a wonderful father.

»» Ghost!Gojo sometimes wishes he was still alive so he could court mom properly...

»» And since he can't do anything about the fact that he's dead (a ghost for practically one year now), all he can do now is watch over them and make them as happy as possible...

»» Ghost!Gojo promises to stay for as long as he can, for as long as he is permitted.

»» Ghost!Gojo gets to see the kids grow up, move out, and he gets to see mom grow old too...

»» It breaks his heart to watch the people he's grown to care about grow old, while he stays frozen in time, haunting this little apartment forever.

»» Eventually, mom had to say 'goodbye', deciding she wanted to move to the countryside. It wasn't an easy decision...

»» The kids, now adults, return to their childhood apartment to help mom move away, and although Ghost!Gojo rarely shows himself these days, he appears one last time.

»» Unsurprisingly, leaving the place behind is hard. Every time they look back on their childhood, it's undeniably brighter and more colorful, and it's all because of the beloved ghost who made their lives so much brighter because of his presence.

»» Ghost!Gojo was their 'Dad,' 'Older Brother', 'Fun Uncle', and 'Annoying Roommate'. He's worn so many hats as the kids grew up.

»» Satoru doesn't stop them from moving away, only thanking them for showing him what it would have been like for him if he had been lucky enough to grow old with kids of his own. He never had that in his life, but he's glad that he got to have that even after he'd died.

»» He doesn't know how long he's sentenced to wander the earthly plains, but he promises to see them around.

»» The younger sibling actually cries and wishes that he was their dad for real.

»» The mom, now old but still sweet and kind, thanks Ghost!Gojo for being part of their family.

It was goodbye...

Gojo: I'm sad and forever bound to an apartment building.

Also Gojo: I will terrorize the next dweller if they're a dick.

The next occupant is an asshole who cheats on his significant other... Ghost!Gojo is making their life hell.

I kind of want to write a fic about this now 🥴

[nwjws]

while you were sleeping - pjs

; PAIRING - jay x gn!reader

; SYNOPSIS - in which you’ve had the same album on repeat, unable to get it out of your mind. just like how jay, your roommate, can’t seem to get you out of his.

; WC - 1.4k (minus the lyrics)

; TAGS - college roommates au, fluff, from jay's pov, based off laufey's 'while you were sleeping' ; WARNINGS - not proofread

i still can't believe that you noticed me

mindlessly scrolling on your phone, you patiently wait for your roommate, park jay, to finish cooking up some breakfast. a comfortable silence has settled between you two, with the only sounds being the sizzling oil on the pan and your humming.

"you've been listening to the same 14 songs for the past week."

"what?" you ask, looking up at him. you stare at his back, broad shoulders exposed by his tank top.

he turns his head to look back at you over his shoulder, raising a perfect eyebrow. you realise then what he's saying.

laufey had released a new album last week, and you literally haven't played any other song outside of it since it dropped. you can feel jay judging you, but you just shrug at him. you were definitely not stopping.

"so what if i've had bewitched on repeat? can you deny that they're good?" you challenged him.

"no, of course not," he chuckled to himself, turning back to the pan. "i'm just surprised you haven't gotten sick of it yet."

"i would never get sick of laufey," you say with mock offence.

"alright, then," he said with a teasing undertone.

you wanted to retort, but he placed a plate in front of you, making you forget what you were going to say.

"hey, you have a later clinical today, right?" he asked as you two dug in.

"mhm."

"take the box i left in the fridge with you before you go then. its some extra lunch i made so you'd have enough energy to get through the day."

"thank you," you say appreciatively. "you really don't have to do that every time i have a heavier day."

"well, if i have time to, then i don't see why i shouldn't."

"what about you? what are you doing today?"

"my professor cancelled class today, so i'll go check out if i can bother heeseung or jake."

"i'll pray for whichever victim you choose, then," you joke.

"maybe i won't make you extra lunch next time," he pouted playfully.

"no, no. those actually really help me. god knows if i didn't score you as my roommate, i would have passed out several times by now."

"grateful to be of service"

after breakfast, jay lounges around the apartment as you're getting ready. some show plays on the tv, but it doesn't drown out the sound of must be love playing from your speakers.

you shout your leaving when you exit the shared apartment, and jay wishes you a good day. he watches you close the door, leaving him completely alone.

i'll never forget the first time i saw you then

when he drives to the shopping centre with jake later that day, he pauses mid-sentence when he realises something.

"is everything good?" his friend asks.

"yeah, i just recognised the song playing."

"really? you listen to from the start by laufey?" jake asks. he had decided to connect his phone to jay's carplay, and had been in the one in control of the playlist.

"not really, but my roommate does."

"y/n? that's pretty cool. they've got good music taste," he replies.

"they've had her newest album on repeat since she dropped it," jay laughs, eyes on the road.

"do you find that annoying?"

"of course not, it's funny seeing them prance around the apartment, belting their heart out," he laughs at a memory of you singing at the top of your lungs. "i guess i'm more of a second-hand listener now? if that's even a thing."

"probably," jake shrugs.

a light pink bouquet, a promise you'll stay and i start to believe

the two had decided to eat out at wagamama's first, before anything else.

"i think i'll get the pad thai," tells the waitor, who nods and notes it on his ipad.

"hm, i'm feeling like trying the grilled chicken ramen," jay says. "oh, could i also get the miso mixed vegetable salad to-go?"

"sure," the waitor replies. he pockets the small device in his apron, and leaves for the kitchen.

"you ordered another meal?" the younger asks curiously.

"me and y/n go here often. of course, i had to get them something. usually, they'll go for the typical miso salad, or some curry, but they've decided they wanted to try being vegan recently. so i got the vegan one," jay explains nonchalantly.

"wow, you really care a lot about them, huh?"

"of course, we're sharing the rent, after all. have to be a good roommate, otherwise they'll leave and i'll have to pay the bills on my own."

"maybe i should get a roommate," jake chuckles. "but i don't think i'd be able to get someone like you."

"i'd feel sorry for whoever ends up with you," jay teases him. "and anyway, they're a good roommate. they do the laundry for the both of us, and we usually spend the weekends cleaning together."

"you guys are so lucky," is all jake says.

i don't recognise myself ; who've i become?

jake dragged jay into their third clothing shop that day, despite jay's protests. in self-defence, jake whines about needing some new shoes.

"don't you have like, thirty pairs? what could you possibly need another one for?"

"actually, i only have twenty-eight. and i need one for graduation, of course."

"right, because none of your almost-thirty pairs suffice," jay rolls his eyes.

"don't act like you dont have seventy pairs of the same polo shirt."

"i don't!"

"i've seen your closet, don't lie to me."

jay sighs and leaves jake to wander around the shop on his own.

"there you go again, buying another shirt," jake's voice sighs from behind jay fifteen minutes later.

"not for me," jay shakes his head. he turns to show the clothing piece to his friend. "for y/n. this is definitely their style, and it'll fit them so well. they have a pair of shoes that are this exact colour, so it would be good outfit if they sandwhich it with any bottom piece they choose."

"you think a lot about your roommate," jake raises his eyebrow at him.

"i see them all the time, why wouldn't i?" jay asks.

"no, like, you think too much about y/n considering you're 'only roommates'," he says with a quote gesture.

"stop suggesting weird things," jay walks ahead to the counter, leaving jake to follow behind.

"is it really so weird, though? if you like y/n like that?"

jay just ignores him, and pays for the shirt. it's not, he thinks to himself, because it's not a new thought either.

i trace it all back, 3:30 am that night something turned in my heart

"thank you, jay," you hug him when he shows you what he got. "you really need to stop buying me things."

"i can't help it," he smiles. "when i see something that reminds me of you, i just feel like i have to get it."

"with how often you buy me things, i'd say a lot of things remind you of me, huh?"

"seems like it..." he scratches his nape, awkwardly avoiding eye contact with you. thanks jake, he scowls in his mind. now he can't stop thinking about what he said earlier.

you and jay decide to watch a movie the next night, since it was a friday, and neither of you had to be up early the next day.

but jay couldn't focus on the tv when you two were basically cuddling under the shared blanket on the sofa. his skin prickled where his arm hung around your shoulder, and the weight of your head on his made him feel light and airy.

the warmth of your body seeped through your clothes, and brought him immense comfort. your sweet scent filled his nose, subconsciously recognising it to be one of the perfumes he'd bought you.

it was only when the movie ended he realised he hadn't been watching at all. and neither were you, if your light snores were any indication.

he huffed amusedly to himself, and shifted on the sofa to get you two in a more comfortable position, actually lying down. reaching for the remote, he carefully switched off the tv, leaving the only source of light to be a soft, warm yellow coming from a corner lamp.

jay stared at your features, illuminated by the dim light. he realised right then, in the comfort of your arms, far into the night, what he felt for you.

while you were sleeping, i fell in love.

; AUTHOR'S CORNER! do u guys ever feel like throwing up at your own work? ALSO THANK YOU FOR 200 this is my offer of thanks 🤭

; TAGLIST - @lovelovelovebts @miyseung @babyy-bambii

[viharbinger]

dad! jin makes me so soft 🥺 i would love if u would write smth for him

pairing: (ghost of Tsushima) dad!Jin Sakai x fem!reader

warnings: female reader, pregnancy, marriage au

a/n: I wanted to make this gender neutral but I'm not really sure how to do that considering this is dad!jin so I hope you are fine with it anon! 😭 maybe I could've made him like have a child earlier before he met reader but that would be an entirely different story I could probably make on a different day

also side note sorry for taking so long I've been playing a lot of uncharted 😝

When he found out you were with child, it's like he's gotten a strong instinct to support you. He's been coming home everyday from his missions with gifts for you and the unborn baby, from a hand crafted child's toy to a hunted deer for dinner!

"Jin.... What is this?" You raised an eyebrow at the sight. A deer mounted on his horse. "Dinner. For you and the little one." He caresses your head, the other hand rubbing against your stomach.

"We can't possibly eat all this before it goes bad." And he replies, "We won't let anyone go hungry. Don't worry." He reassures you before taking the deer down and walking off towards the kitchen where he'll let the servants do the rest of the job.

Right. You do so happen to live in a really privileged and comfortable home. Such perfect conditions to raise a baby. "How thoughtful of you." You say as you follow him through the snow. It looks like you're going to give birth to your baby in the spring, beautiful timing, as Yuriko and Jin says.

You were four months along now, not like you can't handle yourself but Jin begs to differ. He doesn't like you doing anything that he considers 'too dangerous' like doing the laundry or even walking around the streets of Omi village.

Not like you don't do these things against his wishes behind his back though. You do love your walks in the village, but you also do love being pampered by your husband. Oh, he'd cuddle you like a papa bear and shower you with affection. In your last months pregnant, you'd practically run to the door when you hear him come home on his horse but immediately start acting like you were a waddling penguin trying to get to her husband.

"What are you doing up? It's getting hot out, stay in." He ushers you in, brushing the hair out your face that blew when the wind passed by.

And finally... When your baby was about to be born he was so nervous. It was a rough night for the both of you, especially for you of course. But he was pacing around the entire house as you struggled with your contractions. And then came out a healthy, chubby little baby boy.

He was so adorable with his little arm and leg rolls, he was loved by everyone in Omi village. Oh... And your husband just won't leave him alone either. You think that because he's brought him on his horse so much as a baby that that's the reason why your son is so eager to be on one now.

Your husband would wrap your baby to his chest and take him on short rides outside, whispering things to your baby that he won't be able to understand. He'd show your son where he used to spar with his uncle, or where he first met you, telling stories in sweet whispers.

Meanwhile, your son was just sleeping against his chest as he talks to him. Maybe he was more so talking to himself. Jin would also learn to carve toys out of wood for his little boy, which your son absolutely adores. He's definitely spoiled alright.

And in the future when your son gets older, Jin would be teaching him how to hold a sword and fight with it. You actually want him to start learning a little later but they never waited for your approval anyways. Having them sparring and practicing without your approval in mind, you don't say anything because it's definitely funny when they scramble for their words looking for excuses. Like father like son, I suppose!

[bloogers-boogers]

Forbidden Power AU. This AU focuses on Michael, it's the end of all Creation, all thanks to Lucifer's Spawn. Michael's final attempt to fix everything is to Disturb their father Only To Discover that his father is dead and has been dead for what looks like years there is still hope his father may be dead but his Authority can still be used... All angels authorities are held in Halos and God is no exception... Michael has a halo So he can go back and fix everything... The issue is the darkness in his heart, his Desire for the First man... Originally he was going to leave Almost everything unchanged...but this is an Opportunity he never did get or never should have had...can he stay on the noble path...ya No Michael has bin the good boy all his Existence and he will continue to be the good boy But he will be so when it comes to Adam and make Adam Exactly how he wants him to be

Hopefully this ask is for me and not mistaken for another blog shsiwbdjiwe do not get me wrong I love the guitarhero ship but I haven't posted anything about them aside from the drawing I made for @/ironbatpaperturtle (and my adamsapple fic) so I have a feeling that maybe this ask wasn't for me 😭

I should tho... like write more of them cause ngl I really like them together but my whole view on those two is far different than @/ironbatpaperturtle's Michael and Adam ahdjendiw

BUT if this anon is for me then I appreciate you for sharing me your au whdjwkdjdwoek 💖 now, with all that said let me proceed on actually answering you.

Omygod. Okay first, I think the God being dead for the longest period is such an interesting concept I read something similar like this before in a fic (adamsapple) called 'the devil you know /by anglotron' so I like it, kinda explains why angels would be put in so much work (do drastic choices) if God isn't there to guide them and solve things for them or just get involved but I also love the concept of him not giving a f*ck shjsiahdwiwbs after Lucifer's fall/betrayal he was just left hopeless for anything; his most "perfect creation" (Adam) corrupted by evil and then his most "perfect angel" turned out to have been the one to bring said corruption. (he may still care for Michael and Jesus tho but like it's hard for him to care about the rest) and letting all his children figure it out themselves (poor Sera), like, I can picture him just as depressed like Lucifer in the show issisofksos but unlike him who copes with making ducks, God just lays in the couch mopping about how disappointed in humanity he is and how "perfect" everything was before he planted the damn apple on earth, while he bosses Michael and maybe Metatron too (tho with him he's a lot more harsher bc he was previously human and he's kinda just bitter about them in general, but he's proven his worth enough) around to bring him shit like ice cream or junk food (tho he could easily just summoned all those things he subconsciously just wants company and Michael is there to bring it to him the only angel that has not yet disappointed/maintain loyal to him). So yeah.

Anyways — I still like the concept of God actually being dead. Like when you say Michael has a halo do you meant like he holds on to God's halo? Cause that's kinda cool af, imagine him just holding on to the halo of God (maybe even pitifully hopeful their father would return 'saving it for him') so he just has the halo on him and everyone just "oh shit this motherfucker really could just end it all if he wanted to" but Michael just doesn't cause 'with great power holds big responsibility' type of mentality and I think it'd be funny if Lucifer confronts heaven and is in a determined search for Michael to provoke him and remind him he's still the most perfect of all God's creation (mosty just salty as hell bc Michael cast him to hell lmao) and then when he finds Michael he like comes up with a taunting comment about how bad heaven turned out to be Yada Yada that neither realm is perfect or better than the other, and BAM suddenly his eyes drifted to Michael's head and recognizes the halo.

"Is that—...!"

"Yeah," Michael simply states defeated in his chair, unfazed by his brother arrival, from all the chaos going on, his people being murder, just, done, "father's gone, Lucifer."

So they just stare at eochother in silence, Lucifer with a stunned almost hurt expression and Michael with a nonchalant one. After the realization hitting him like a truck Lucifer realizes there was no end to the chaos released to all realms after Charlie unintentionally brought it to them if God wasn't there to fix it all...

Fear overwhelming him now cause he was kinda chilled out about the whole thing knowingly God would have to intervene soon because heaven was also being attacked by evil- but now realizing he's dead, it like hits him hard, mostly worried for his daughter's fate more than anything else.

Then, another thing hits him, "wait! What aren't you doing anything?! You can fix this, Michael! You have father's power, we can-"

Michael lifts his hand to signal him to stop, "I'm not planning to do anything."

"WHAT?!! Do you realize your people are also being attacked!"

"Your daughter brought this among ourselves, now, she must find her way to solve it."

"But she won't be-"

"Silence. If she was able to bring it to us then she's more than capable of putting it back. If not, that's no longer my problem"

"YOU-!"

"No, Lucifer," he stands up, the power of God emitting through his aura, the millions of eyes on him, big six graceful wings extended to show their full on glory, eyes bright like the intensity of a star. His voice was much more deeper and cold, distant, detached, "I lost everything because of your silly dream of free will, and now redemption. Look at where it lead us, prove me wrong this time, if it doesn't succeed then it was meant to be that way. Accept your fate.

I would create something new, something different. Something that won't betray its kind. No longer you existing. It will be perfect."

Lucifer felt so tiny now. That was no longer the brother he once knew. Not the caring, gentle, protective fiercely warrior that he once was.

Only filled with rage, grief and pain.

Michael... is dead too.

But anyways with all that, somehow lets say both Charlie and Lucifer mange to remind Michael of his love for the countless souls left at his hands to care and protect. And I dunno maybe a song too ahdhdiqgsjahsia and what gets the cake is Michael seeing Adam alive, behind the two, who somewhat stumble across their intervention in a 'bad timing'.

"Hey bitch you forgot your tampon— oh shit! Wrong room," Adam (now sinner) appears at the door oblivious of the whole deal.

"Adam!" Charlie shouted annoyed as they were already, almost, having a heartfelt moment between her father and Michael.

Michael eyes watered, "ADAM!" He pushes past Charlie and Lucifer who are now just confused as fuck seeing how Michael (filled with new growing hope) crushes Adam in a big hug with all the intensity of his power and somehow it was till so gentle and careful that it didn't kill Adam.

And the first man just there struggling to get loose while also suffocating.

Idk I just like Michael still having to be the hero even in circumstances where he doesn't want to. So the universe just grants him a purpose for he to keep following up God's title for him. If he wasn't gonna do shit because he lost Adam? Then BAM! Sinner Adam is now a thing so keep your ass moving Michael!

Michael now wants to fix things up to keep Adam safe; his new purpose (reason) on protecting heaven, his people and the countless souls God left him in charge with.

[sunrayram]

im super interested in alastor’s and niffty’s dynamic in this au!! im not really sure how to word this question but do you have anything youve been thinking about with them, outside of him just being very protective/possessive over her, and her still being fairly loyal to him? any headcanons or ideas you have for the two of them?

Alastor has two whole friends before the events of canon, Mimzy and Nifty. Even though he'll never admit it, he desperately needs both of them.

I've gone into his relationship with Mimzy before, but she basically acts as the only person Alastor can really let loose around. Alastor only really has some genuine fun when Mimzy's around.

When it comes to Nifty, she's the closest thing Alastor has to family on this side of the mortal plane. Nifty is the first soul Alastor owned, and it was honestly a pretty painless affair. At the time, Nifty's ex-husband had still been alive in hell, and Alastor promised to keep her safe in exchange for her soul. The ex-husband has long since been dealt with, but Nifty has no complaints about Alastor still holding her soul. She once jokingly told him that it was likely in safer hands now.

here's some fun stuff about these two!

Alastor cooks, and Nifty bakes. Nifty is the only one who's allowed to go in and out of the kitchen with no complaints from Alastor, and they can spend hours there together, singing along to classic jazz from the radio.

Alastor is not allowed to just say whatever he wants on his radio show, since it's now a part of the Jackpot Casino. That means he has a lot of opinions built up that he's not allowed to share. If he's not yelling these opinions at Husk, he's passionately sharing them with Nifty. She thinks they're funny. Sometimes, she'll bargain with him. He'll be allowed to rant for an hour, and then she'll get an hour to read her latest fanfiction out loud. Only her sfw stuff tho, obviously. (She reads him found family fic as a not-so-subtle-hint of how she feels about him. It goes right over his head.)

Nifty and Alastor play a weird version of fuck/marry/kill when they have the same shifts at the casino. Nifty points out the people she'd fuck/marry, and Alastor points out the people he'd kill. It's fun, I guess.

Nifty really really wants them to get a pet. Alastor banned any discussion of dogs, and Nifty's slightly allergic to cats. She has a list she's been secretly making of animals she thinks Alastor would like. It goes as follows:

Possum: eats bugs. Frog: no fur, not dirty (?) eats bugs. Alligator: Alastor has an alligator skull. Might like them. Bat: eats bugs. Con: Might have rabies? Deer: Maybe some form of kinship. Pig: Actually pretty clean. Makes funny noises. Anteater: eats bugs.

Alastor loves collecting trinkets, which actually annoys Nifty to no end bc it means his room isn't clean/organized. He apologizes by bringing back little gifts whenever he goes out. He also keeps his collections away from areas Nifty frequents so it doesn't bother her as much.

Alastor has banned Nifty from gambling at the casino. The one time she tried, she lost almot 500,000 dollars in one night. Even Husk was horrified.

They're both a bit mad, but they like it that way. Nifty's one of the only people around who doesn't want Alastor to change. Whether or not that's a good thing ... ehhh who knows. But it's priceless to him.

[blacklegsanjiii]

i keep seeing so much content of sanji being raised by a warlord and brought to the meetings and desperately need more abt that. depends on who his parents is, but what are his relationships with the other warlords in one of these aus? how many recognize him, how many are still fond of him, how many turn a blind eye to the boy who used to pester them as a child?

come to think about it- is it possible to have an au where sanji is raised by all of the warlords at once? i have no idea how this would happen, but sanji is just. passed between warlords like a child of divorced parents (fuck he would have to grow up with croc AND mingo oh dear). all of them end up getting attached to him and are conflicted when he becomes a strawhat pirate. his crew mostly just want answers on how all these powerful enemies clearly know their cook, who keeps dodging all their questions cause he doesnt want to face the backlash of the warlords' collective ward becoming an enemy of the wg

So I'm going to answer this ask in two parts because that's so funny. I'm going to skip Donquixote!Sanji just because he has the most interaction and detail in regards to Warlord meetings and Dad!Mihawk never brought Sanji nor did Boa. So unfortunate they don't get time to shine.

1. How the warlords react to a kid being the meetings.

With Fishman!Sanji everyone thinks he's cute and quiet and his snacks are so good. Doffy uses this Sanji to try to sway Crocodile into kidnapping a child with him. Crocodile is just "anything raised by you won't make it to twenty, no." Boa thinks Fishman!Sanji is fine. He thinks she's pretty and says it but Sanji is more interested in the libraries and Marines than anyone there. Crocodile absently pats Sanji as he passes where as Doffy holds him to the sky and Boa is like "ew" for the most part. Gecko Moria is probably disinterested in all of the Sanjis and will avoid him. Perona is interested though and will play with Sanji when she's there too. Mihawk will actually smile at the boy and talk to him about cooking and will bring a bento for the boy sometimes. Kuma doesn't have his humanity so.................................

Croc!Sanji basically says hi to everyone and then reads quietly. Mentions every once in a while how dumb or inefficient something is. If Doffy comes at him he runs for it. The first time Sanji comes to a warlord meeting in a dress or whatever Boa is like "is he making fun of woman?" And Croc is like "my son has no gender" which makes Boa take him shopping properly. Mihawk and Jinbei will leave cook books or something. Perona does Sanji's make up whenever he's in a dress.

Perona stands in for Gecko Moria I feel like. He just seems more interested in zombies than children. Which, I get. Big Sister Perona comes in when she's old enough.

Readmore for divorced polycule parenting. It does get to marineford,

2. The Warlords(Except Kuma, for obvious reasons) all co parent Sanji. Let's start with which warlord finds Sanji!

I am screaming. OH NO! Mihawk showing up to a warlord meeting, holding a child and apologizing for his delay? Doffy asks what that thing he's holding is and Mihawk is like this my son, Sanji. Everyone is staring at him. Boa asks what the fuck he's doing with a kid.

Mihawk explains he got Sanji and Redleg off a rock and Sanji went with him and the kid is like ten and so small. Doffy somehow cajoles Sanji to be held by him despite his fear and it's like a whole thing and Mihawk is amazed because he's been bitten so hard it draws blood. Everyone is amazed. Crocodile is genuinely concerned about the fucking man holding this kid who is maybe a tenth his size at best. He even gets Sanji calmed down more by moving his coat enough to hide Sanji in it while he holds him.

After the meeting Sanji is properly introduced to all who care, even if Boa is a bit standoffish. Crocodile asks if he'll be a regular attendee to the meetings and Mihawk says yes because he doesn't want to leave Sanji alone on Kuriagana with the humandrills. Jinbei asks Sanji a few questions which they all attentively listen to the answers of. Sanji stutters out about opening a restaurant on the All Blue and being the first to find it.

The next meeting Sanji is gifted cookbooks by the other four warlords and Sanji thanks them quietly with tears in his eyes and ohhh they were not expecting that. Nope.

"What the hell, kid? You can't expect us to believe Mihawk is the first person to be nice to you." Crocodile puffs on his cigar and when Sanji doesn't answer Boa grabs Sanji and holds him for the meeting. Afterwards Doffy uses his strings to take Sanji around. Mihawk is frowning the entire time as Boa tries to turn Doffy to stone and Jinbei tells her not to do that for Sanji's safety. Crocodile manages to lure Doffy back with the promise of a meal.

The next meeting Mihawk has to go on a job that will take a few weeks and he doesn't want to take Sanji so Crocodile offers to take him to Alabasta and return him at the next warlord meeting. So Sanji goes with him and at the next meeting Daz and Bon Clay are there and Bon Clay is explaining to Mihawk and Boa that Sanji isn't just a boy. Boa squeals in delight and after the meeting she and Mihawk take Sanji shopping. Sanji is confused because it was just something he thought he could only do in Alabasta but Mihawk is like "Why would I do anything to stop you from being happy?" And Boa is so happy because she has new little person to spoil with fine dresses and stuff and Mihawk is trying to explain that Sanji is training physically and Boa is like "AND???? LET ME SPOIL THEM MIHAWK!!"

The next time Doffy takes them despite Crocodile and Jinbei saying he shouldn't but Doffy just flips them off and basically kidnaps the kid. Sanji comes back with three carton of cigarettes, fifteen bentos and looks like he hasn't bathed in a week despite Doffy and Sanji saying that they just took a bath. Everyone is looking at Sanji and the cigarettes and Sanji is like "Doffy's family gave them to me as a going away present. Baby 5 kept hitting me."

"You gotta hit her back!"

"That isn't appropriate let alone with their trauma." Jinbei says.

"We'll train them." Boa proclaims proudly.

"Oh no." Mihawk whispers to himself.

Jinbei takes him next because everyone but him is on a job and Sanji is marveling at everything in Fishman island and excitedly tells everyone when the next meeting happens. At this point they all stay after the meetings to hang out with the kid and if they're staying the night to get breakfast together. But it's weird for the marines to see the Warlords, some of the most feared pirates on the seas be sweet to this kid.

Boa gets Sanji last. Sanji comes back with so many dresses and skirts some make up and their hair styled. Doffy picks them up and proclaims them as "Cute" while displaying Sanji to the marines around them. Jinbei laughs in agreement. Mihawk is pinching the bridge of his nose and practicing his breathing techniques. Thus begins the rotation because Sanji is just being passed around by the warlords because they all went to spend time with Sanji equally.

Perona eventually finds out about this but instead spends the weeks Sanji is with Mihawk with them and enjoying her time on Kuriagana. She and Sanji play dress up. Sanji cooks all the time too. Perona talks about zombies and Mihawk listens. They all paint nails and Mihawk says they should be doing this on Amazon Lily and not Kuriagana. Both Sanji and Perona stick their tongues out at the man.

Sanji still has set backs and the warlords will have calls to check in on Sanji. Like it is insane how caring they all are for this kid. Sanji's ptsd with bugs? Doffy has someone whip an anti bug cream. Nightmares? Jinbei will tell him stories and teach him some techniques to calm down. Mihawk explains haki and how to hide and use it to his advantage. Crocodile teaches him all about finances and shit. When Sanji is dysphoric Mama Boa is all about taking them out and spoiling them and just affirming their gender and will let the others know.

Sanji is suddenly calling four men variations of "dad" and Boa is "mom" and being taught multiple different fighting styles, languages, and is working on his haki. And when he starts at the Baratie all the Warlords will come visit him and on his birthday? It's a mad house. It's insane and Zeff, Patty, and Carne are looking at the guy calling five different warlords 'Dad', 'Papa', 'Papi', 'Mama', 'Pops' and just watching them cater to the eggplant as if he's so good and when Sanji tells them Zeff won't let them berate women for incidents with food wastage Doffy brings Baby 5 and Perona to Baratie and Sanji fears for his fucking life because this is a no win situation.

When Sanji joins the Strawhat crew on the phone with Crocodile in Little Garden he disguises his voice to the best of his abilities and it doesn't really fool the man who since he knows what's going thanks to Robin being at Whiskey Peak. Crocodile calls the other parents and is like "Guess what our child is doing" Mihawk mentions he let the greenhaired one live when he was at Baratie. Boa screams that Mihawk is dumb and suddenly everyone on the call is yelling at each other except Jinbei who is laughing his fucking ass off.

In Impel Down Crocodile Jinbei obviously convinces Luffy to get Crocodile out and when they're all at Marineford Jinbei yells to the other warlords that Luffy is Sanji's captain, Ace is Luffy's brother, and Sanji is missing thanks to Kuma. Mihawk asks if that's why Roronoa is at Kuriagana.

"Probably, so change of plans?" Crocodile asks.

"Change of plans." Doffy nods.

"Boa, you do know Luffy is seventeen, correct?" Jinbei asks her and she's frowning.

"No, I don't read the paper."

"WOMAN YOU ARE LITERALLY A QUEEN NOW LET'S DO THIS BEFORE EVERYONE GETS KILLED!" Crocodile yells and suddenly there's two extra warlords helping in the fight and the Marines are like 'fuck' and Ace and Luffy are confused because no one has mentioned this. At all. So the Warlords take over the fight to get the fleet. Jinbei gets Ace and Luffy out and promises to explain when the other's join them even if they're fading in and out from everything that happened and both of them still taking lava punches.

Shanks shows up and ends the war and finds out on the television that five warlords, two of which were in Impel Down started fighting with Luffy to save Ace and he still ends the war. When he asks them about it they just go "He's our child's captain." Shanks and Buggy are blinking at them confused because what the fuck.

[hostilemuppet]

Brozone (and friends (and enemies)) twitter drama au

Collaborative between me and @squirrelpatties. Truly our magnum opus

Jd: previously a frequent twitter e-clown infamous for name searching and starting beef with people who insulted him. His fanbase thought it was hilarious in a "grandpa escaped the hospital" way. Eventually was forced to relinquish control of @/brojohndoryofficial to his pr manager (clay) after he responded to 14 y/o @/j0ndryballzweat.

Floyd (part 1): his sex tape (with a fan he didnt know was a fan but thats hardly relevant) gets leaked. For the first three days everyone's timeline was full of "do NOT share it around, dont even look for it, if someone sends it to you IGNORE it, this is a disgusting breach of privacy" until Floyd addresses it by tweeting "decided to put on a different kind of show for you guys" and all hell breaks loose. Every tweets hidden replies are full of screencaps and reuploads for a month. People edit the video so just before anything explicit happens it's replaced by a video game cutscene or meme, which Floyd retweets a lot of. His brothers ask him to stop (both for publicity and bc it makes them uncomfortable) so he starts posting thirst traps on insta. Clay yells at him so Floyd tweets "clay just asked when I'm gonna get a girlfriend :/" which brings us to-

Clay: homophobia allegations. Admittedly the least serious and would have blown over quickly if it weren't for him panic tweeting "I'm not homophobic! My girlfriend is a bi lesbian!" People were NOT happy. It takes him three days of retweeting 'helpful educational threads and carrds' on lesbianism written by 14 y/os for people to get off his back. Viva understands.

Bruce: stays off social media bc its the mind killer so he lets clay take care of @/brobruceofficial. This goes well until clay gets drunk and thinks he's on his private account but is actually on Bruce's public. When he wakes up (hungover) in the morning hes got Bruce banging on his door asking why TMZ is reporting on him cheating on his wife. Bruce tells him to clear things up but clay JUST got the lesbians off his back and can't afford to be back in the hotseat...

Branch and poppy: branch was annoyed by all the branch/poppy rpf fanfic (poppy likes them bc she thinks they're cute and funny. When brozone go on tour she reads the smutty ones) so he suggested to poppy that they stage a fake breakup. Poppy is initially against the idea until branch brings up how much fun itd be to sneak around like a couple of teenagers. Poppy scrapbooks the tabloids about their breakup. Clay and Bruce blame clays drunken tweets on branch so clay seems like the victim. Poppy acknowledges this on twitter in a way that very heavily implies they broke up bc branch was cheating on her with her own sister. Viva does not understand. This one doesn't have a resolution yet bc we moved onto:

Barb: previous lesbian icon turned reactionary transphobe. Riff stopped associating with her once she started getting really public with it and now she keeps tweeting stuff like "you-know-who left me just to work with misogynists. Really makes you think 🤔 " which he ignores.

Riff: while still working with barb he was approached to collab with creek (damage control for the... unsavoury things he said about rock trolls). The second the song released he tweeted "wow that guy was an asshole LOL" bc he didn't realise he wasn't supposed to do that. Cut contact with barb once her transphobia went from "mild, I can fix her" to "jesus fucking christ". Briefly worked with Floyd until his second controversy at which point riff tweeted "cmon, man" and turned off his phone. Riff hasn't done anything wrong and he deserves a lot better

Velvet: crafted the perfect expose thread on Floyd when she was in prison, including "pro life" "publicly sharing inappropriate sexual content" and "uses the toothpaste flag". Posts it the second she gets let out of prison and instantly becomes #1 on trending (alongside "floyd" "pro life" and "#HUGS4CLAY).

Floyd (part 2): tweets "why does it even matter that I'm pro life if I'm gay and don't 'believe' in 'voting'" before doing another line off his boyfriends torso. People bring his leaked nudes back up and start insulting his dick size and its the first time hes ever let a controversy bother him. His next tweet is "I am not ashamed of my body" and the top reply (creek pfp) is "you should be ❤". Clay is biting the skin off his own tongue.

[total-drama-brainrot]

Total Drama Psycho Noah AU, after the 'London Adventure' and the truth being revealed, Chris then decides to make this a reward challenge... The reward is that EVERYONE gets to be in First Class, with NOAH... Chris and Noah are curious to see, who will be brave enough to actually enter First Class, after learning about Noah's insanity... How would Courtney + Gwen + Duncan reacts to seeing the video of Noah's insane side showing? 😈 Would Alejandro and Noah still be friends? 😈

Listen, as much as this idea is so fucking funny to me, I really don't think it'd work from a storytelling perspective.

Though (not to push any agendas here, but-) if Chris were to hypothetically have the remaining contestants go against Noah in an enclosed space, in a sort of predator-vs-prey scenario, it'd probably play out something like The Beast chapter in Slay The Princess... without the "eating them alive" aspect, of course.

(Heavy Content Warning for that link, by the way. There's a lot of violence/gore/body horror, among other stuff, by virtue of it being a horror game.)

Maybe he'd lock everyone in the First Class cabin and turn off all of the room's electronics, so the only source of light in the cabin would be the wavering moonlight from whatever tiny windows are dotted around. Noah would use the cover of darkness to his advantage and toy with his competitors in a similar vein to how the Ripper had in their challenge that day, darting silently through the shadows to 'capture' his castmates, picking them off one by one.

It'd be a fun game of cat-and-mouse for Noah. For the others? It'd be a living nightmare. They wouldn't have the luxury of knowing that Noah wouldn't really hurt them, and the bloodlust they'd seen on that screen would be terrifying to watch but downright petrifying to experience first hand. They would be genuinely fearing for their lives, in a way that Chris hadn't been able to prompt since the early days of Island, and the host would love it.

Not that he would do that. And not that Noah would actually attack anyone either. (Without reason to, of course.)

But you are right about one thing; if this AU were to become a fully-fledged story, the London challenge would have to be a reward, just to keep Noah in the competition. Because he literally snapped Zeke's arms like chopsticks- his team would vote him out in a heartbeat just by virtue of him being so dangerous.

Which means the whole of Team Chris (plus Duncan) would be sharing a poorly-lit, structurally unsound cabin with someone they're terrified of.

...Owen notwithstanding, since Owen's a sweetheart and he knows Noah.

But the others would be immediately on guard around him. Noah, knowing there's no reason to keep up his ruse of sarcastic apathy, would probably relish in their fear- he enjoys tormenting people, after all, especially when that torment is purely psychological. So he'd carry on playing the 'unhinged, bloodthirsty sociopath' just to watch the others squirm.

He'd probably make a huge show of still having the Ripper's knife, tucked safely in the sleeve of his white undershirt, and comment that he and Duncan could be 'knife buddies' or something. If only to see how the punk's pierced face would drain of all colour at the prospect of Noah having a sharp object. (Duncan would absently rub at the puncture scars on his hand, to Noah's delight.)

But it'd eventually get boring, I imagine, so Noah would do something to reassure his teammates that he's not some ethics-devoid monster hellbent on destruction. Because having your teammates be in a state of constant paranoia around you would get annoying after a while, and it'd impact their performance in the competition (which Noah isn't really all that concerned with, but Owen is, so Noah doesn't want to do anything to jeopardise their chances of winning challenges).

So he'd drop the exaggeration of his more violent traits, and intentionally show off the unharmful aspects of himself- namely by koala-clinging to Owen and acting 'normally' like they'd done before the London challenge, and/or by approaching Tyler to ask how he was feeling after being stretched on the rack and sheepishly apologise for leaving him behind (showing empathy and remorse, to humanise himself n front of his teammates).

He's insane, not heartless.

As for Alejandro...? I have no idea. Would he even want to risk approaching Noah to find out if their shared comradery was all a ruse? Would whatever tentative trust he had in Noah be completely shattered by the reveal? Or would he be so engulfed by his need to win the competition that he only views this new development as a boon, since now Noah can be more of a physical asset for their team?

It'd probably be a mix of all of these. Alejandro would be left off-footed by the reveal of p!Noah's 'true self' (however much of his 'true self' he's willing to show to others) but I imagine he'd be quick to ally himself with the guy who can break bones like they're chalk and deceive a whole cast of people for two and a half seasons, regardless of any personal misgivings.

[nardo-headcanons]

heyyy how do you think the founder era characters, and maybe some akatsuki members, would be in an road to ninja au???

omg nonnie, that is such a funny idea!

RTN!Akatsuki and Founders

I havn't watched Road To Ninja in a while, but as far as I know, the Akatsuki are like a normal mercenary group? From what I've seen, they haven't changed much personality wise, which is a bummer. this is a long post, so more under the cut! also please take these with a grain of salt lmao

Kakuzu is terrible with money. Absolutely terrible. He's the worst treasurer the Akatsuki ever had, but no one dares to take the job away from him because he still has the best connections and also he's just intimidating so they let him do his thing.

Itachi was probably a bigger player than RTN!Sasuke. He had to flee Konoha from all the unwanted fangirls and -boys. Outside of battle situations he is the goofiest man alive. Puns and everything, but very charismatic and playful. This Itachi KNOWS how good-looking he is.

Konan is a total klutz. She is very bubbly and sweet, openly showing her care for everyone in the world, but please do not let her near anything breakable EVER. She'll run up to you, be like "Hiii, reader-chan!" and fall flat on her face or trip over her own feet.

Deidara is scared of his own explosions. He's, much like Konan, very clumsy, especially with his bombs. Often had to pay Kakuzu to reattach his limbs and always jumps whenever he blows something up. Also, he will read more about the chemistry behind explosions than the actual explosions themselves.

Sasori is still a human, and he hates anything having to do with corpses, bodily fluids or organs. He's making all his puppets out of wood or other materials. Very cleanly, squeamish and emotional.

Hidan is very professional and soft-spoken outside of battle, he's trying to TALK you to death. He really likes meditating and has a soft spot for kittens and cinnamon buns. His bloody battles are an outlet for all the anger he suppresses.

Kisame is unintentionally really rude yet so gullible. He's very obsessed with his looks and considers himself a top tier guy looks-wise. Those women that rejected him in the bar? They are just scared of him because he's just too cool for them. He doesn't care about the cause of the Akatsuki and just joined them for his own selfish ambitions.

Madara has betrayed the Uchiha clan after Indra's death, by trying to be "one of the good ones". He is a loyal Konoha soldier through and through, ruthless and cold unlike his canon counterpart, who is very empathetic and loving, but instead with great charisma. He himself believes the Uchiha suffer from the "curse of hatred" and thinks all discriminatory policies against them are justified. He rarely uses his sharingan in battle.

Hashirama ruthlessly rose to power as the first Hokage, not even considering Madara as the first candidate. Unlike canon Hashirama who I think was just painfully naive, this one is fully aware of the position he is putting the Uchiha in and just. doesn't. care. Once he set all these policies in motion, he abandoned the village to go drink and gamble because being the Hokage bored him.

Tobirama watched as his brother enrolled all his policies and was disgusted with how the Uchiha were treated. He is struck with guilt for killing Izuna and steps in when the village is suddenly abandoned. He tries reforming the cruel policies his brother put in place and thanks to him, the Uchiha massacre could be avoided.

[cdroloisms]

fuck it i'm making this c!awesamdreamity sitcom AU (dr3 edition) a real thing for the funnies alone. why the hell not

premise: they get thrown into a sitcom. that's it. they're in a sitcom world that plays by sitcom rules, which means that everything that occurs Has to conceivably work within the genre. that means no throwing dream in a cell underground and treating him as a prisoner, sam, that's not funny enough. they can't leave or escape, and if they try to do something that Doesn't work within the genre they'll either just be completely unable to do it or they'll be foiled in some genre-specific way (ex: sam tries to build a cell on the property anyway and ends up in a three-episode arc about his fight with HOA)

the main point of this set up is that anything is technically possible as long as it works within the bit. also, yes, there's a laugh track, and whether or not the characters can hear it has everything to do with what's the funniest option (c!sam fucking hates the thing, for the record.)

highlights of this include:

the sitcom Demands A Relationship. because neither c!quackity nor c!sam is willing to do the whole married couple spiel with c!dream, that means that c!awesamq are the ones that are officially "together." this goes so fucking badly and is like, the primary reason why i'm making this a thing in the first place

c!dream isn't Allowed to be a prisoner, but he does have to stay within the house. between the genre and c!awesamq's opinions, he's not really going to end up as just "the roommate" or family or you know, an official third part of the throuple, so the maid it is

a level of violence is allowed but like, the actual pain/consequences has everything to do with whether it works For The Bit or For The Drama. like, c!q might hit c!dream with the car and nothing will happen bc it'll be played off as a punchline, for example, but also a dramatically timed fall might lead to someone walking around with a broken arm for an 'episode' or two. there's no magical accelerated healing here, just the Power Of The Bit

similarly, a lot will be allowed to slide as long as you're genre savvy about it. c!quackity won't be able to get away with outright torturing c!dream for hours, of course, but pushing him around is fine as long as it's funny enough. especially if it comes with a side of romantic drama

speaking of the romantic drama, hoo boy are c!awesamq a fucking TRAIN WRECK. like my god are they so toxic. c!sam is literally the quintessential asshole condescending boyfriend on that server and c!q has a quick fuse, a hell of a temper, and generally reacts to being talked down to with several knives and cursing. they take to a domestic romantic relationship as a fish does to . uh. lava maybe. like it's BAD

think screaming slammed doors things being thrown there's a glass sailing towards c!sam's head screaming over the banisters holes in the drywall fine! FINE! [laugh track] bad. it'd be gloriously, ridiculously toxic. the crowd goes wild

c!quackity has to contend with the fact that his husband is absolutely down horrendous FOR THEIR STUPID GODDAMN MAID .

the maid also wants his husband more than quackity :/ sidelined in his own relationship once again (i wonder why, Q)

how well they adjust has everything to do with how well they acclimate to the genre. c!quackity does the best job--he knows how to play a crowd and do so well. c!sam by FAR acclimates the worst. he's inherently completely offended by the idea of everything about his job and the prison being turned into Entertainment, into something Funny, into A Show To Consume and basically reacts to the sitcom thing by trying to ignore it. this, of course, means that he ends up generally being the butt of the joke

c!dream is. well. at least he's got less stress about dying i guess. and is generally a lot less injured bc starvation and torture lead to lower comedy ratings smh. is still kinda in hell but you know yesterday he got to watch c!quackity hit c!sam over the head with a frying pan and literal cartoon birds appeared so

honestly he's kinda quietly having an existential crisis and lowkey earning sympathy points from the proverbial audience by being the one that comes off the least as Just The Complete And Utter Worst

(meanwhile: c!sam is yelling at c!quackity for how he's apparently cut up all of his dress shirts while c!quackity screams back about something something and he can stick the scissors up his ass)

[laugh track]

[lilblucat]

Are there gonna be any major changes to the parent au now that ep 8 is out?

Ngl I don't think I'll be changing anything. There's a few easy tweaks I can make, but also some hard ones. Here's a list:

Khan and Nori are almost completely different between my fic and ep8 and I'm very attached to how I've written them to change that. Nori's presentation here is actually very important to the current arc and removing that removes a lot of the soul of it I feel

V's Sentinel would have to be added in

The explanation for why the Solver isn't around anymore could just be used as the reason why Uzi being its new main host isn't a thing in this fic. Eventually I figure she would've tried to purge it from her systems and it ended up fragmenting (somehow this makes every Solver user unable to access their Solver abilities)

Easy tweak but I mention at one point in the fic that V only lived because of Uzi and N doing... something? That could be an easy scrub

In light of episode 8, J's quest to eliminate the Solver fragments could be seen as her trying to amend things. That she was wrong in willingly working for the Solver. I was also writing J as if she didn't know she was working with Cyn and the Solver, so that's also a change

It's REALLY funny to me that the state we leave Uzi in is so resembling of the situation in the fic. 24 is canon what the fuck. And both situations feature Uzi eating something she shouldn't. Uzi gets extra flesh and a voice in her head that she doesn't like :)

Also it's lowkey funny to me that I accidentally just... wrote in the theme of the show into this fic? Episode 8 makes it clear that being genuine with others and yourself is kind of the theme here, and that's exactly what Uzi and N work through for the first arc of the fic. Trying to be people they really aren't and relapsing into who they actually are, even if that's not what others want of them. Like yeah, it's the same thing all over again basically lol.

Other stuff that's funny to me in light of episode 8:

A Sentinel rider was something I was cooking for this fic. It wasn't going to be V, though. I have concept art on this blog of the harness for this. Also you guys can take this since I've shared this crop elsewhere before lol

The tease with Doll still being alive works almost perfectly into an idea I've been trying to make work in this fic. Before episode 7, this was originally my plan with Nori's character

I wrote this fic with the idea that Uzi isn't in her original body? I'm pretty sure I made a few nods towards this probably being the case in the fic (at least, I remember keeping it in mind for the tail surgery chapter). I figured it would be destroyed in the finale and uhhhhh according to the final bit, Uzi is now a collection of cameras like Cyn. She's a hologram now... I was right that her body didn't last the finale

[sweetkpopmusings]

jisung coworker headcanons <3

a/n: when i tell you thinking of coworker!skz fills me with joy and peace, i am not lying <3 i'm so endeared by jisung as he is a silly little guy and i hope in a different universe i am in fact his coworker :,-) pics not mine !!

content: fluff, nonidol!au | wc: 0.9k | warnings: none! | pairing: coworker!jisung x gn!reader | requests: open

you meet him because you're having a strange problem with the main program you use at work

and one of your coworkers sends you his way because "jisung can fix anything"

you were like okay don't know why you emphasized "anything" but i can't finish my project like this so i'll go see the ~mystical jisung~

your coworker was right because 1) jisung fixed your issue within 5 minutes 2) you watched him fix problems for 3 other people WHILE he was helping you

he's the office ace

which is how you get to know him because you have a week where all of your technology, equipment, etc are cursed

jisung's just like "damn if you wanted to get to know me you could've just bought me a coffee" he actually says that to you

he doesn't expect you to buy him a coffee though

when you do, he gets the widest eyes and a huge smile on his face <333 suddenly he's so shy and thanks you softly <333

after that, he says "good morning !!" every day and will say "hi :-)" whenever he passes you in the office :,-) he still feels a lil shy after you were so nice to him, but he wants to show his appreciation by being kind to you in return <3

next thing you know though, he's talking a million miles an hour every time he sees you because he wants to be official coworker besties !

y'all end up having SO much to talk about

whenever something exciting, funny, or ridiculous happens, you are the first person he tells and vice versa

he also constantly suggests to you and asks for your recommendations on movies and shows

he wants to debrief with you every time both of you have watched something and he'll do impressions to make you laugh

sometimes he gets you in trouble because of how much he talks to you during the workday

but you don't care because it's SO refreshing to get so much serotonin from one person

outside of fun chats, he's actually a really helpful coworker

not just with fixing tech/program issues, though

if you're having a hard time putting together a workflow for a project, choosing a template for a document, or simply writing an email, jisung is by your side helping you out (and encouraging you!!)

you're also the only person in the entire company he'll go to for help

he trusts you so much actually !!! because you're the one person who doesn't put him on a pedestal for his skills. you tell him all the time how he's so talented at literally everything he does, but you like him for so many other reasons that he doesn't feel uncomfortable being himself around you

which is why, if he knows you two are the only ones in a certain area of the office, he WILL break out into song off-key

you're getting a full performance every time you are in the break room together

he especially does this when you two have to stay late because "we need to stay energized, y/n!!! where's your team spirit?"

he will become an absolute mess of laughter on the floor if you do a ridiculous performance

probably has to take a break after because he laughed so hard his stomach hurts

he'll also use you as an excuse to get out of things LOL

if someone he isn't fond of wants to meet with him to finish a report or something when they could just do it online, he'll say "oh, sorry, i'm working with y/n on a big project, so my calendar is pretty stacked. i'll review it and leave comments for you though!"

he's obviously a cool and adorable guy, so people ask him to after-work hangs a LOT. he's not mad at it, but, he isn't the biggest fan of awkward small talk with some coworkers

so he'll hit them with "ah, i wish i could, but y/n and i are going to the movies tonight, so i'll have to do a raincheck!"

he runs up to your desk and panic whispers things like "if anyone asks we're going wine tasting on friday night !!!!!"

and you're like ???? wine tasting ???

one of y'all's coworkers walks by so instead of explaining, jisung loudly says, "yeah, i heard they're suuuuuuuuuper famous for their red blend too. should be fun to see how it compares to the rest of their wine repertoire!"

you're holding back laughter at his commitment to the bit

this happens so many times you stop questioning it and play along, much to jisung's delight !!

he always assures you that you don't have to actually go anywhere with him, but you often do because it's so fun to hang out together

jisung's antics also include pranking you

like say your office does a gift exchange for the holidays. jisung begs on his KNEES to get your name

when you are handed your gift, you immediately know it's from jisung

because he's giggling and making comments like oooOOoOoOOooOOoooOoohhh let's see what you got, y/n!! open your present first!!!

he's such a silly guy he can't hide his excitement :,-)

once you open it you're both laughing your asses off because he managed to get you a rubber chicken that has a customized squeak so it's actually audio of jisung imitating a rubber chicken

for as much as you're doubled over in laughter, he is in total hysterics because he loves his own joke so much <3

jisung is legitimately the best coworker buddy you could ever ask for, and he has no clue how he survived so long at work without you

if you make any joke about quitting he'll always say "yeah if you quit i'm coming with you. you're never getting rid of me >:-)"

and he really means it <3333

[rascalentertainments]

Wish Granted AU: The 7 Teens 👥👥👥🌟

This one was both the most fun and hardest one to do. At first I hated the idea of 7 friends in general cause its canon that the directors added them later in the story and they wanted to just have a free reference without actually doing something. But the more I thought about it, the more I could see that they were accidentally given a good opportunity to create a new batch of loveable characters. So many creative ideas with it! Even the original concept shows that they had more thought and personality to them!

And they actually did have some personality in the deleted scenes, both during the distraction plan and the dungeon scenes, they felt more like characters than the final film. They had Seven Dwarves without actually acting like the Seven Dwarves, like how....???

Sorry to say, they did nothing in the movie. (yeah, I watched Wish, it was lame. Moving on.) One thing I want to achieve here is they'll be a mix between the Dwarves and the Mane 6. I swear this makes sense. 😅 Also one big difference here is that instead of being friends with them from the start, Asha meets each teen one by one when she and Star enter Rosas. A few of them even know Flazino, but not on a super personal level, just that he's seemingly loyal to Magnifico and Amaya. The teens know each other pretty well since they all work around the same place, but having them work together to start a revolution and defeat an evil will cement them as friends with each other and Asha and Star.

So let's give a quick rundown on each one. The more the story evolves, this page will be updated for additional backgrounds or changes to them.

Dhalia: Combination of Twilight/Doc. She's still a baker in this in version, and her wish is to become the greatest baker in the kingdom. (I actually didn't know this was something canon to the movie until later, it just something I came up with by coincidence!) She's incredibly loyal to the king and queen (with a bit of a crush on Magnifico) and willing to do anything for the kingdom. And...let's just say her role in the story will be bigger than some other rewrites or even the film itself.

Simon: Combination of Big Macintosh/Sleepy. While he still retains his sleepiness, its a result of losing his wish. He was actually strong, outgoing and jovial before then. Now he just doesn't have any ambition to do anything aside from his daily tasks. His wish was to become a royal knight and protect the kingdom.

Gabo: Combination of Rainbow Dash/Grumpy. He's incredibly loyal, but he hides it behind his rudeness. He's been duped so many times that he doesn't trust people anymore, especially when finding out he's right about the king being no good. His wish he's keeping secret, but it'll be revealed somewhere in the story.

Bazeema: Combination of Fluttershy/Bashful. Still keeping her kindness and ability to sneak up on people from the movie, Bazeema adores nature and especially animals. She gets along with just about all the animals in the forest, the royal horses and even the birds. She LOVES when Star turns into animals, since he's the entire animal kingdom rolled into one! The only animal she's never succeeded with was Sabor. He's just too much like his owners to get along with. 😂 Her wish is to provide a safe haven where all the animals would be safe and recover together if hurt.

Dario: Combination of Pinkie Pie/Dopey. Now I know you're thinking why not have the Pinkie inspiration for Hal? Well, I wanted her to be a bit more of a grounded type of funny instead of zany. Since Dario is based on Dopey, he provides a lot of awkward yet endearing humor. Sometimes he tries too hard, but he means well. He always manages to make Star laugh though! His wish is to bring laughter to Rosas, as he's one of the few who notices not everyone is exactly happy there.

Safi: Combination of Rarity/Sneezy. Despite Safi's allergies, he loves animals and is a bit shy around Bazeema whenever he helps tend to the garden or animals around Rosas. He might have like a hundred allergies, but he's always generous when it comes to helping his kingdom. Even though the King and Queen don't appreciate it. 😅(I'm also playing with an idea of Safi x Bazeema. Not entirely sure. I just kinda....got a small vibe of that from watching the movie. Maybe it was just me.) His wish is to get rid of his allergies so he can carry on a conversation without sneezing. Yeah, that's it! 😂😂

Hal: Combination of Applejack/Happy. Bit of a rougher gal in this one. She, a hard worker, but has a great sense of humor. She even helps be a test audience for Dario when it comes to his jokes, which eventually leads them to become a duo. Hal feels pretty content, so she hasn't really thought about a wish to give.

At one point later in the story when all of them do come together, I got an idea for their battle cry or team signal being "Heigh, Ho!". I still can't believe they didn't even use that in the movie.

Oh and there is still a traitor in this story, but...its not who you think it is. That's all I can say without spoilers. So you'll have to figure it out as it goes along.

And there you go, that's gonna be it for the characters now! The only one that may get one is Flazino, but it would be later down the line if I did to avoid spoilers. So now, the first test chapter is coming next! It'll include the "Welcome to Rosas" song, but with a twist! And my bestie @signed-sapphire is gonna help me with it, so stay tuned! 😉

@wings-of-sapphire @oh-shtars @chillwildwave @flicklikesstuff @annymation @tumblingdownthefoxden @emillyverse @mythartist21 @kstarsarts @kenihewa