#give him 5 stars dammit

[yagirlyubnub]

One of my theories for Mr. Puzzles right after WOFTI 2023 came out was that he was gonna be secret fanboy, kind of like Syndrome from the incredibles

but as time passed, I felt that personal theory was debunked-BUT

I THINK THATS THE NEW DIRECTION THEYRE GOING FOR BABYYYY

[cdragons]

Fuck Everything, But Mostly Fuck You - Part 5

Previous Chapter, Masterlist

Summary: You have never, EVER, in a million years hated anyone the way you hated Felix fucking Catton. And if you end up murdering your English Professor for forcing you to be paired up with him, WHO COULD BLAME YOU???

Warnings- MDNI 18+, Mention of SA/SH, BDSM (sex dream), M/M/F sex dream, Felix is a pig, Reader claws Oliver's face, Michael loves Reader so much y'all, Farleigh is on Team Michael, Oliver is delusional and awful, alternating POVs between characters, and author has spent too much time researching Oxford crap for this mess for a crack fic to be a crack fic.

Author's Note: Finals are a BITCH, but I'm finally done...except I have to do my summer classes soon. But I really wanted to put this chapter out since it's been a while. Thank you all who've been reading this fic and sharing wonderful comments! They really help push me to become a better writer!

Michael’s head was about to explode in the next thirty seconds if fucking Farleigh Start didn’t stop digging his paws through his closet and drawers. No amount of clinking and clacking from tapping on his keyboard would be enough to dull out his shirts shuffled in his chest and hangers shrill screeching against the metal bar in his wardrobe.

“Dear God,” the Yankee, stick-figured giant groaned. “How many math pun shirts do you have? Don’t you have any normal ones? Oh my god, are all the pants you own khakis or Oxfam jeans? Do you seriously not own a single pair of corduroy slacks?”

He slammed his laptop shut. God-fucking-dammit, he was going to kill this asshole if he didn’t shut the fuck up.

“Maybe,” Michael gritted out, “if you just focused on the presentation we’re supposed to be working on, it’ll not bother you.”

Farleigh Start clicked his tongue. “Now, now – it’s not nice to be so testy. Most would consider themselves very lucky that I’m providing my services for free.”

The blonde-blind nerd balked when the word ‘services’ entered his ears. Immediately his mind thought of all the rumors that latched to Felix Catton’s mysterious American cousin – who apparently sucked off every teacher in England. Not that he was homophobic or anything – kiss, fuck, marry whoever you wanted, but he wasn’t interested in that sort of thing.

“Services – are you trying to suck my cock so I’ll do your work for you?!”

“…First off, ew,” Farleigh began. “Second, if I left you to do my side of the work, I’m about…86% confident that you’ll end up tanking my grade.” He strolled to Michael’s closet, pulled out a blue gingham-checkered shirt, and grimaced. “Thirdly, I am referring to how I am going to turn–” he nodded towards Michael in disgust “–this, into an actual suitor for our dear (Y/N). Or are you two still doing this little dance of being nauseatingly following each other around like sad puppies and giving each other bedroom eyes without actually fucking?”

Don’t take the bait, don’t take the bait, don’t take the bait, don’t take the–

Michael slammed his laptop shut and tiredly rubbed his eyes. With a loud and audible groan that he dragged out, he rubbed his eyelids until he could see the kaleidoscope of stars and squiggles in the dark.

Fucking damn it.

“How many fucking times do I have to tell you?” he damn-near shouted. “It’s not like that between us!”

Farleigh quirked a brow. “The bedroom eyes or the not-actually-fucking? Because if it’s the former…yes, it is, but if it’s the second,” he brought his hands together in a slow clap, “then well done, Gavey!”

Michael shot up from where he was sitting and ripped the shirt in Start’s hands before throwing it back in his silky oak wardrobe and slamming it shut. Was it so necessary for him to be so fucking insufferable? Was he born this intolerable, or did his fucking cousin, Felix fucking Catton, infect him because being a coked-up narcissist was contagious via proximity or blood?

He heard a few clicks behind him, and the scent of Marlboro Gold cigarettes filled his room.

“So what are you going to do about it?”

Michael turned around and stared at his completely useless study partner for this stupid project for his Classics course that he needs to fulfill his fucking “General Education” requirements. Farleigh Start was leaning against his dresser and staring at him with the most judgingly empty gaze ever worn – all while holding a cigarette between his two fingers and getting ash on the floor.

Great – like it wasn’t a bloody fire hazard to cover his carpeted dorm in hot ash.

He shrugged. “What’re you on about?”

Farleigh took a long drag on his lung cancer joystick before exhaling deeply. His disappointed look made Michael’s eyes twitch in irritation.

“About a certain mutual friend we share and adore,” he drawled. “Whom just so happens to be in my dear cousin’s room right now…at night…on a weekend…alone.” He paused to take in Michael’s reaction and smiled. “Ohhhhh, so you do care.”

Michael shook his head. “Nothing’s gonna happen between ‘em. (Y/N)’s too smart for that.”

“Yes, you see – I know that…and you know that. But my cousin?” Farleigh scrunched up his face and made a wish-washy motion with his hand. “Ehhhhh…he’s more the type to think a giant, glaring red-neon sign with blinking lights saying ‘STOP’ is another giant, glaring purple-neon sign with blinking lights saying ‘Come Hither’ in porno studio 69 font.”

Michael Gavey rolled his eyes and reopened his laptop. “Whatever, I’m not worried.”

“You’re telling me that it doesn’t bother you that our friend is currently in the lion’s den with Oxford’s king?”

“Of course it bothers me,” thought Michael, “but I trust her more than I trust you.”

But Michael wasn’t going to let his forced-upon acquaintance know his thoughts, so all he said was…

“She’s not in the fuckin’ lion’s den, alright? They’re in the Bodleian. I’m going to pick her up from there in like thirty minutes.”

Farleigh cocked his head to the side. “Don’t trust our girl to make smart choices?”

“I trust (Y/N) just fine,” Michael bitterly retorted. “It’s your fucking cousin I don’t trust.”

Because he does – he trusts you so much. He knows how sweet and kind you were to everybody you thought deserved the benefit of the doubt. ‘Deserved’ being the very fine keyword in the detailing because there was no fucking way in hell you were dumb enough to think Sir Felix Catton of fucking ‘SalTbURn MaNor’ deserved your kindness.

Mary, Jesus, and Joseph – he wanted to strangle the old kook when he announced the assigned pairs.

It was Classics English taught by Professor Radcliff Michael Charles Douglas. He droned on about what materials would be on the end-of-term examinations. Everyone in the classroom, save for you and a few others, was either passing notes by throwing them across the room or staring aimlessly at the air with red-rimmed eyes.

“Ya’ ready, partn’r?”

You pursed your lips as a groan fought to escape. You would regret introducing John Sturge’s 1960 American Western masterpiece, “The Magnificent Seven,” to Michael Gavey if he kept up with that god-awful Texas accent.

You turned to your left and shot a blank glare at Michael. “Listen, Billy the Kid, we don’t know if we’re going to be assigned together,” you said.

“Come on, Professor Douglas always pairs the people sitting together as partners so far in the entire term. If it’s not broke, why fix it?”

“Melanie Brown…paired with Bryce Landon…Kemi Brown…paired with Amelia Sanders…”

You leaned on your elbow to whisper in Michael’s ear to drown out your professor’s blasé voice.

“Can we do our project on Hercules?”

He leaned back. “Why him?”

“I want to present on the glorification of toxic masculinity in mythology, and he’s the prime example.”

Michael chuckled. “You just want to piss off old Douglas up there.”

“Katie Caldwell…paired with Oliver Quick…”

“Is that so wrong?” you asked with a smirk. “You can either be one jump scare away from seeing Jesus or a product of institutionalized glorification of misogyny – but you cannot be both.”

Michael stifled a laugh. “You realize that takes away pretty much half of the English, Math, Science, and every fucking department on campus, right?”

You innocently tilt your head to the side. “Does it?”

“You’re terrible,” Michael snickered. “Completely evil.”

“Oh, please,” you swatted his arm. “You love me anyway.”

“Michael Gavey…paired with Farleigh Start…”

You and Michael turned to the front with disbelief. Wait…if Michael was paired with Farleigh…then that meant…oh, no.

“(Y/N) (L/N)…paired with Felix Catton. That will be all – no changes.”

Michael watched with wide eyes as your head slowly turned to the back of the lecture hall. He watched your face pale in disgust and horror when your eyes stopped at Felix Catton. Michael’s blue eyes narrowed at the lecherous grin Felix shot to you before he puckered his lips to blow a little kiss with a wink.

Your body involuntarily shuddered at the predatory implications. Michael watched as his best friend buried her face in her hands. He heard her say the exact same thought he was having.

These are going to be the worst few weeks of my life.

To say it bothered Michael that Felix Catton was making the moves on you, so to lure you to his sex dungeon of a dorm was an understatement. It was killing him to know that you were essentially forced into a vulnerable position, but when he brought it up to your professor, the old cunt-rag didn’t give two flying fucks.

“Professor Douglas, please,” Michael pleaded. “I really think it’d be in everyone’s best interest if you could make this exception this one time. I promise it has less to do with me and more for (Y/N)’s sake–”

But the ancient windbag wasn’t interested. “Whatever accusations you and Miss (L/N) intend to throw at Mister Catton, I am uninterested. Honestly, Mister Gavey, I expected this kind of nonsensical drivel from your friend, but to see you being caught in her schemes disappoints me greatly.”

Michael bit his tongue to choke down the tongue lashing he wanted to give. He wanted to tell this wrinkled ballsack about how the ‘fine Mister Catton’ basically assaulted you. He wanted to scream how worried he was when he didn’t see you for the rest of the day. He wanted to shout how when he knocked on your dorm and entered, he froze and paled at the sight of you crying your eyes out until they were red and puffy. He wanted to roar out the fury he felt when you revealed to him the incident with Felix Catton that morning in the empty lecture hall. The very same one where Professor Douglas taught.

*TRIGGER WARNING: THE FOLLOWING SCENE FEATURES PAST SEXUAL HARASSMENT AND A DISCUSSION OF THE TOPIC, IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ THAT, PLEASE SKIP OVER*

“I couldn’t do anything,” you whimpered. “I felt like…like such an idiot! I just froze and stared and did nothing!' You started to cry all over again, and Michael wiped your tears with his thumb before holding you close to his chest. “Hey, hey, hey – it’s okay. Freezing and doing nothing are two different things. You were stunned by what happened, and your body reacted the same way – anyone who tells you differently is a liar.” You shook your head. “I couldn’t even speak…it was like my body – it ju-just shut off on its own. My brain kept screaming, ‘Let go,’ ‘Get off,’ or ‘Stay away from me!’ But I…the words and my voice just failed me when I needed them the most.” Michael blurted out the first thought: “(Y/N), you need to report this.” Your eyes shot open in fear. “Michael, no–” “Look, I know you’re scared, but this is assault. He touched your inner thigh, and you clearly didn’t consent – that’s sexual assault, or at the very least sexual harassment! If you report it, at least the campus police know about this and keep an eye out for you.” But you weren’t listening. “Nononononono—Mikey... that’s not how it’ll go down. Even if I report it, they won’t believe me.” “You don’t know that!” “But I do!” you cried. You shot up and started pacing across the room. “I do know because I’ve seen it happen! Almost every girl I knew growing up—it happened to them! At school, on the trains, some at their own homes! Whether they knew every detail of their assaulter or just saw just a patch of skin – it didn’t matter!” You weeped. “And if I tell the cops, they’ll just throw away the report because they’ll think that ‘all he did’ was touch my thigh. Consensual or not, I’ll be labeled as some fucking crazy man-hater who’s grasping at straws to ruin a fine young man’s life and reputation.” You collapsed back on your bed. “I just…I can’t deal that kind of shit right now. Not with…” you took a deep breath, “Not with everything that’s happening right now.” “…What can I do to help?” Michael hated how his voice cracked. He hated how completely useless he felt at that moment. More than anything, he wanted to march to the campus police and report it. But he knew that by doing so…he took even more control away from you by going behind your back. And then he would be a no better monster than Felix Catton. The idea of him going beyond the point of no return made him clench his fists until his knuckles turned white. But when you touched his hand, all the tension flowed out of him like a creek. “You already did the best thing anyone could do for me right now,” you reassured him. “You listened to me. You cared enough to look for me when you felt something was off. You reached out to me and stayed and listened. And most of all…you believed me.” Michael felt his throat go dry. You looked at him with so much trust, as if he were the safest place in your world. He wanted you to look at him that way forever. “I’ll believe you,” he swore. “I’ll be there for you – no matter what. I promise. Whenever you need me, I will be there.” No words can describe the relief you felt from hearing Michael’s promise. When you entered Oxford's campus, you never expected to meet someone as endlessly loyal and trustworthy as him. You were prepared to keep your head low and remain friendless for the next four years. You were ready to spend the next 1460 days crying your heart out from homesickness and imposter syndrome. But somehow, near the beginning of your first term here, you met Michael. And you were so grateful for him. You leaned in and lightly kissed his cheek. “I know. I know you will.” And you believed that with all your heart.

*TRIGGER SCENE END*

Michael promised you – gave his word – that he wouldn’t say anything to anyone. But, fuck, this asshole was making it hard to keep that promise.

“Mister Catton is a fine young man…”

No, he’s not.

“…one whom I have full faith will end up as remarkable as his father and grandfather before him.”

They probably pulled that same shit, too.

“A man with a future as bright as his does not need some upstart with delusions of grandeur to dismantle an institution as fine as Oxford blatantly spewing out trash about him.”

It’s not trash.

“Unless it was something with proof and worth my time?”

Michael looked at his Classics professor with empty but enraged eyes. “…No, professor. It’s just a personal matter between me and Felix – (Y/N) has nothing to do with it. She’s just…protective, I guess.”

This surprised the sagging skin suit. “Hmm, well, that sense of loyalty from such a strange girl is surprising, to say the least – especially when you take account of her…troubling background as an American from that horrible city. But perhaps there is a chance of decency in her, after all.”

Michael’s right eye twitched slightly. “And what do you mean by her…background?”

“Oh, come now, Mister Gavey. She’s a New Yorker. That city is full of…of…gang-bangers and drug addicts.”

“Her dad’s a professor at NYU, and her mum works for the buildings that host Broadway shows.”

Douglas scoffed. “HA! New York University – what a joke. A campus that’s filled with hippies and no class. And Broadway? Of course, Miss (L/N) is connected to the theatre community. Now, if that’s all, Mister Gavey, I have an important meeting to get to with the chairman of my department. I trust that this matter is settled?”

No, not even close.

But all Michael could do was clench his fist over his backpack’s strap. He forced an unconvincing smile and tersely nodded.

“Yep, won’t get any more problems.”

When old man Douglas replied with his patronizing smile, Michael wanted nothing more than to knock out the rest of the tenured professor’s teeth with a fire hydrant.

So…no, Michael Gavey was not at all okay with the fact that you were with Felix Catton. He was not OK with the idea that you were within ten feet of that depraved vampire.

All he could do was be reassured you were in a very safe and very public space with lots and lots of people who could serve as potential testimonial eyewitnesses if Catton tried anything.

…Provided that Catton Sr. wouldn’t be able to pay off everyone, their third cousin, and their dog.

You wanted to die. You wanted to literally sink into the ground. You wanted there to be a sinkhole to open under you, swallow you whole, close up, and you would never see the light of day again.

…Actually, you wanted all those things to happen to your useless fuck of a project partner.

“Y’know, if you’re bored here, there’s a party going on at one of my mates’ flats not far from here.”

Felix moved to the seat right next to you and limply swung his arm over your chair. “So why don’t we–”

You shot up and moved one seat over. “Considering how we’ve been working on the research for almost two hours, and you haven’t gotten any work done,” you bit out. “Getting wasted and losing more brain cells isn’t the right call.”

Taking your open hostility as a challenge, Felix continued to move closer to you. “Exactly! We’ve been at this for two hours, and nothing got done!” His face was inches from yours, and you could smell the rank stench of craft beers and rancid cigarettes on his breath. “So, what’s the harm in having a bit of fun?”

Oh my – this is getting fucking ridiculous.

You started to pack your bags and gather all the borrowed books. “Parties aren’t my idea of ‘fun.’ And I already told my friend to meet me–”

“So bring him too! The more the merrier!”

You took a deep breath and mentally counted to ten. “Our presentation is due in a week, Felix. One week to hand the paper in and present our topic to the class.” 

You swung your backpack over your shoulder. “I take my coursework very seriously, and to say it’s frustrating to have a partner who doesn’t take it as seriously as me would be a supreme understatement.”

“I think from now on–” a swift *RIP* echoed between them as you took a page out of your college-bound notebook. You quickly jotted down instructions for topics so simplified a child could figure it out, “– it’d be best if we work separately.”

Felix shot up from his seat with a panicked look. “Wait, now hold on – let’s not get hasty.”

“I already have a basic outline for the paper - I’ll type up the paper,” you continued while not looking at him. “All you have to do is find the books I’ve so nicely labeled on that sheet of paper I’ve given you.”

“Wha-what happens after I find them?” Felix stammered; his heart broke from how his time with you was so cruelly cut short.

But your tone and body language remained as rigid as it was apathetic. “You have my email, you have a laptop – figure it out, genius. We’ll meet up at a specified time and place; you hand me the books, and we move on with our very separate lives.”

You walked out of the crowded library and toward the nearby bench where you and Michael agreed to meet when he picked you up. You barely had time to sit down before you were bombarded with the presence of a much worse pest stuck to your shoe.

“You get off on bein’ a downright bitch?”

God, was every asshole trying to piss you off tonight?

You turned around with a prominent scowl that further deepened as your eyes took in the insufferable bastard who was clearly trying to pick a fight with you. You don’t know why you bothered to look for confirmation. You immediately knew who it was just by the sheer arrogance oozing from his tone.

As an artist, you had a special relationship with the color blue. In the summer, there was a point in the early mornings when it felt like the world was bathed in it. There was even a period when you were downright obsessed with it. You loved anything and everything blue: the sky, the ocean, hydrangeas, the Obrina Olivewing butterfly – but eyes, you loved painting blue eyes.

You thought of them as these warm, magical rarities that belonged to the stuff of fairies and Disney princesses. Of course, you also knew the popularity of the usage of blue with winter and death, but you never felt that duality…until now.

Because as much of a slimy bastard Oliver Quick was, you had to hand it to the guy…he was one of two people with some of the bluest eyes you’d ever seen.

Which gave you all the more reason to hate him. He made blue eyes look so cold.

 You clenched your backpack strap. “I’m not in the mood, Quick.”

Oliver scoffed. “I’d disagree – you’re always in a mood.”

“So stop talking to me,” you snarled, turning around. “And go away, Michael’s meeting me here soon.” You started to walk away when you heard Oliver speak again.

“I’m surprised he hadn’t dropped you left,” he maliciously quipped. “With you and Felix and all that.”

Your nails dug deeper into your backpack strap. “There is nothing between me and Felix – nothing at all.”

“Yeah, for now,” Oliver shook his head. “But you’ll be crawling to him with your hands and knees on the ground, worshippin’ him like he’s Hercules or Apollo.”

He leaned in closer from behind you. “And you’ll compare Gavey to Felix and look back and wonder ‘how the hell could I have missed being with Felix Catton over some pathetic’–”

Stop it. *clench*

“–unimportant–”

Shut. Up. *dig*

“– know-it-all –”

I hate you. I hate you. *pierce*

“– nobody.”

You turned around and dug your nails into his face as you poured every bit of rage and disdain for the single most insignificant person you’ve ever met in each word that came out of your mouth.

“Enough,” you roughly whispered. It was taking everything inside you to stop lashing out even further. “I don’t want to hear another word from you.”

“What? Plan to –” Oliver winced as you cinched onto his skin.

“Of all the mind-bogglingly,” *clench* “douche-like” *dig* “and despicable” *pierce* “crap you’ve spewed out,” you rasped. “Implying that I would ever choose as dull as Felix Catton over someone as rare and wonderful as Mikey has got to be one of the worst.”

“Do not push me any further, Quick,” You felt him tremble as you slowly released him from your grasp. “I’ve tolerated too much from you and the object of your obsession for far too long as is.”

You stepped back and gave the boy before you a good, hard stare. You never felt rage so deep, so demanding.

It was exhausting.

But you heard your name being called out from your left as you turned your head to see Michael waving to you with his arm high in the air. Had it been anyone else calling out your name, you wouldn’t have felt so quickly eased. You were about to move ahead to meet him halfway in the distance before Oliver’s voice stopped you.

“…What could possibly make him so special?” Oliver pathetically whimpered. “Why would you ever choose him when someone as bright as Felix is begging for you? Do you know what being with him means for you? What it gives you?”

…Was that it? Was that his best shot to get under your skin?

Looking at Michael, you answered him without meaning to.

“There’s no point in explaining it to you,” you calmly stated. “And I think you’ve wasted enough of my time.”

You picked up your stuff and left him alone with his thoughts. As you walked away to join your friend, you could feel his icy sapphire eyes digging into your back. Michael could feel how tense you were and asked if there was anything he could help with – but you waved away his concerns, stating that you had already wasted too much of your time with Felix and Oliver and didn’t want to waste anymore. Slipping your arm over his, you snuggled closer to his side and let the familiar scent of old math textbooks and coffee comfort you.

Oliver would make you pay for what you did – you’d be naïve to assume otherwise. He won’t do it directly, but it will happen. He’s the type to drink poison and expect you to die…only to learn too late that it worked as you lay on the ground bleeding and screaming your throat raw for help.

But right now, you were with your best friend; you two were going back to his dorm for a best friend sleepover, and it’d be enough.

…Yeah, it’ll be enough.

Oliver needed to make a plan – and fast.

Getting into your good graces was no longer a viable option for him; you made it annoyingly clear of that by the way you attempted to maul his face off. He gingerly touched the claw marks you imprinted on his cheeks as you tried to dig for his blood and bone with your nails. A corner of his mouth went up as he remembered your viciousness. He could practically taste the blood that nearly trickled down his cheek after you pierced his skin.

He hadn’t expected such a blatant display of violence from you, of all people, let alone on the campus’ hallowed grounds so near an establishment as ancient and crowded as the Bodleian.

For you, sweet, innocent (Y/N), to show such open hostility…to know he urged that beautiful, dormant impulsiveness to emerge…it thrilled him like nothing else. At that moment, he so clearly saw it. A darkness that was hidden deep inside you – bursting open from your carefully stitched seams. A deep desire for more in the dull, dull life God cruelly set upon you. Why else would a sweet, little all-American girl such as yourself travel all across the Atlantic to one of the most prestigious universities?

No, you were like him – exactly like him. Your reaction to his goading only proved that to him.

You weren’t used to it – that much was obvious…but that meant little to him. If nothing else, Oliver was resourceful. He’d learn more and more about what makes you tick before plucking you piece by piece into what he needed you to be for him. He’ll watch you explode before making you fizzle.

The idea of you at your fiercest – only for him to break it down bit by bit until all that was left was a more…subdued version of the hardheaded American girl from the Big Apple who loved to aggravate him during her first-year days at Oxford.

The thought alone made him salivate.

He could only dream how you’d be in bed. Your tight, hot little body would be squirming and writhing from the pleasure he and Felix bestow upon you. You, helplessly lying on your back while being fucked dumb by the two of them.

God, he felt himself getting hard at just the image alone – to make it a reality…that sort of victory, along with having Felix, would be nothing short of heaven for him. He unbuttoned his jeans as he took out his hardening cock into his hand. Not wanting to bother himself by starting slow, he immediately stroked himself with a rough and unforgiving pace. He wanted the pleasure from the fantasy to overwhelm him.

You looked perfect—replete, ethereal, and effervescent. Your entire body twitched as your eyes were blown wide, and drool dribbled down your chin. You put up quite the fight; the scratch marks on his and Felix’s chests proved that. But seeing you on your back on red silk sheets with your wrists and ankles tied to the bed posts made the struggle worth it. The red and pink bite marks that begin from the column of your slender neck down to your plush and tender inner thighs made for a prettier picture you could ever paint. “Oliver,” you pitifully rasped. “P-please, m’sorry – AH!” Your body jolted, and your back arched as he slapped your swollen clit. He struck his hand down one, two, three more times and watched as you thrashed and cried before another peak was forcefully ripped within you and came gushing out. God, how many times was it at that point? Three, four? It must have been quite a high number, judging by how tightly your cunt clenched onto his fingers when he thrust them inside you. “Look at her,” Felix cooed from behind Oliver. The Saltburn heir’s hulking frame towered over his lover as they watched their pet beg for mercy. “You almost feel sorry for her.” His hot breath panted into his ear as Oliver shivered in delight. The Quick boy gasped when he felt Felix’s large digits begin to enter his tight, puckering hole. “Take your fingers out,” he ordered. “And stick your cock inside her. You’ve been so good to me that I’ll let you fuck her sloppy cunt while I finger-fuck your arse.” Oh god, yes. Oliver took out his fingers and immediately positioned his hard cock at your leaking pussy as he spread your legs apart and forced your knees to press against your chest. “Wait,” you slowly blinked. “Wha…what’re you do–” Your back arched as Oliver pushed into you before thrusting into your cunt at a brutal pace. Tears were streaming down your reddened, flushed face as ecstasy-laden sobs filled the room. “Good boy, Olly,” Felix praised as he continued to push his fingers inside Oliver while the nails of his other hand dug into his hips. He let out a ragged gasp from how Felix deliciously stretched him out. He started out slow before moving his fingers at a faster and steadier pace. “That’s it, Olly. You’re so good – so good to me.” God, the contrast between the firm grips and harsh thrusts with gentle whispers of sweet nothings was like nothing he had ever experienced. And it only made the pleasure of Oliver plowing into your weeping pussy while you cried like a bitch in heat feel too good to be true. “Oh, you’re getting so tight,” Felix groaned. “You wanna come, don’t you? You wanna spill your cum into our pet’s little cumdump hole, right?” “Yes,” Oliver rashly answered before snarling to you. “You hear that, you dumb slut? I’m going to cum in you, and you’re going to take it.” “N…not i-inside,” you begged despite your walls clenching tighter around his cock. “P-please not inside!” Oliver just laughed. “You want it – oh, yes, you do.” He released one of your legs to grip your jaw and forced you to stare at him. “Don’t bother denying it. Your body knows how a whore like you is just desperate for me.” He chuckled as he thrusts into you even harder than before. “Well?” “Yes!” you cried out. “Yes, Oliver! Let me be your cumdump! I want your cum so badly!” Before Oliver and Felix permitted you to do so, you spilled onto Oliver’s cock, and the tightening of your walls, mixed with how deep Felix pushed his fingers inside him, made Oliver’s mind go blank – and soon, all he could hear was white noise.

Oliver slumped into his chair as a coat of sweat covered his entire body. Thick, white ropes of cum were still spurting out of his softening cock despite it coating his right hand. He ran his left hand through his dark curls as reality settled back in. Cold, bitter loneliness engulfed his body as he realized that you and Felix were not with him, and he remained as alone as before. A newfound determination to make his fantasy a reality soon took place.

His vision will be a reality. Felix will love him. And you will be their pet whose sole purpose in life is to take load after load of their pleasure.

But such things were too early to think about with how you were now. No…no, no, no…you were far too raw in your current state…too volatile…too stubborn…too American. He supposes it shouldn’t be too surprising that you latch onto fitfulness and inconsistency.

You were an artist, after all, and such was the fate of your kind to be destined to forever claw their way from the bottom as a means of survival.

But, however charming your unpredictability may have been in your concrete-paved, urban paradise that you call ‘home’ – that simply won’t do for him. He was more than confident that he could make you see things his way, but there were…problems needed to be resolved.

Namely, one in particular that came in ill-fitting apparel and bulky-framed eyewear – Michael Gavey.

Only an utterly blind idiot would miss how you pathetically secure your entire emotional well-being onto him. Oliver watched in total desolation and disappointment at how your glorious rage dissipated at the sight of him. But a part of him was equally as impressed at the mask you so expertly paraded, going so far as forcing your body language to adapt to the circumstances.

But…it wasn’t a mask, was it?

You looked at Michael Gavey the way he looked at Felix – complete and total worship. Michael Gavey, for whatever reason, was your sun, moon, and stars. The way you protected and so ardently adored him made the conclusion all the easier to reach.

Suddenly, it all became clear.

Of course…how did he not see it? The answer was so obvious. What better way to force you to his and Felix’s side…than to separate and condition you?

Isolation was a cruel and sadistic thing to thrust upon anyone – let alone who had so few friends in a foreign country like yourself. But he knew how much of an effective tool it could serve for him. Oh, it would be arduous initially – yes, it will. But it would all be worth it in the end. After all, in a way, this was your fault. If only you had complied with him when he was being nice, he wouldn’t have had to resort to such drastic but necessary measures.

Oliver darkly chuckled to himself.

Yes…everything would turn out in his favor. He’d make sure of it.

Tagging: @ethereal-athalia, @arcielee, @asa-do-your-thing, @aphroditesmoon, @axelsagewrites, @the1999kid, @poolnoodlerescuer, @aemondsbabe, @winterblu2, @abaker74, @whereismymindno, @agustdeeyaa, @iamavailablesstuff, @bonnieblue0606, @st-eve-barnes, @nyxthoughtss, @immyowndefender, @ilovemydinoboi, @ahristata, @cxp1d, @jinsoulorbitzen12, @temptation-waits, @bollzinurmouth, @jcngw0ns, @seababehh, @destinydestnation, @lankyboi4, @mindless-rock, @cassavacakes, @paradisepoisons, @pansexualpamandabear, @erikasurfer, @lissamans, @cookielovesbook-akie, @thesmutconnoisseur, @izzyisstuff, @lariisouz, @ma1dita, @jeondeluxe111, @itszzmoon, @wolfeginny, @mioshasworld, @bre99

Let me know in the comments your thoughts and if you want to be tagged when I update!

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go pray to my ancestors and beg for their forgiveness for writing Oliver's POV 🥲

[nerdieforpedro]

20 Questions of Writers 📑

I was tagged by @frenchiereading @avastrasposts and @maggiemayhemnj (Bless the three of you. You know a dissertation is coming 🤣🤣🤣) 💜

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 81 works on AO3. There are some that are there and not on Tumblr yet. As to why, some of them are other series I haven’t finished or I’m not sure if I should post them here.

2. What is your total AO3 word count?

As of today: 351,908 words (updated for a new chapter of one of my works)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently: Pedro Pascal, Oscar Issac, Garrett Hedlund and might dabble in Call of Duty (maybe)

No longer writing: Marvel

4. Top Five fics by kudos: (some of these were written long ago, when Nerdie was a wee one in fandom)

Sard’ika Sessions (the most in kudos and hits- it tells me ya’ll like Din being a soft dom and using several different tools, maybe at the same time?)

Our Journey Across the Star Ocean (people enjoy the way I write Din maybe?)

The Viper Longs for Foliage (the one fic I have about Oberyn Martell - I don’t feel I write him well but people feel differently I suppose 🤔)

The Best and the Worst Day (AO3 only - Chris Evans fix it was a phase 🫣)

I want him to see me (AO3 only - I had to look up what this was lol Sebastian Stan fic)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! I make sure to go through my inbox to reply to anyone who was nice enough to leave me one. ☺️

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Bold of you to assume I finish fics regularly 👀

Scarlet Stains and their Echoes Such angst with a Backstreet Boys joke thrown in. 😆

7. What is the fic you wrote that has the happiest ending?

This is a three way tie (cheating because Nerdie is not above it) between Sard’ika Sessions, The Lake Between Us and Parts of you Mr. Morales. Each fic has a different Pedro character - Din, Ezra (I had to give him something happy 😭) and Frankie.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not that I’ve seen. I totally thought I would and that’s why something stay on AO3 or in the WIP folder but so far I have not. It’s like waiting for the other shoe to drop.

9. Do you write smut?

I used to. I used to write a lot and enjoyed it. I find now that when I write smut it’s awkward and takes me at least a month to finish a smut scene because despite watching and reading reference materials (porn and other awesome smut fanfic here and on AO3) I don’t have the same mojo when writing it any more. I feel a bit sad about it, but there’s nothing that’s worked. It’s not like I don’t have thots. I just can’t get them in a fic. 😭😭

10. Craziest Crossover?

I haven’t really done many. One m/m fic where Din and Poe crossed blasters (pun fully intended), one sandwich with a female reader, Lucian Flores and Benny Miller, My Tim Rockford series where Dieter is his brother and that’s about it I think 🧐

11. Have you ever have a fic stolen? Not that I know of. So happy I’m in my small weird little box 📦

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not that I know of.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic? Nope I would be open to it but I dunno how the process would work.

14. All time favorite ship? The Razor Crest, it has room for passengers. 😆

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Such heart ache 😣 My first series that I started was with Dave York (he was done so dirty dammit!) and it was pretty smut filled. Felt with him and the OFC’s messed up dynamic as well but because of all the smut and how I can’t seem to write smut to save my neck now, it will likely go unfinished. 😭

16. What are your writing strengths?

Honestly, I’m not sure. Maybe just the weird plot ideas I can make and dialogue. That’s about it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Finishing a fic, SMUT, weak comedy (I can’t resist it though), fixating on small details that don’t matter and everything that wasn’t listed as a strength. What is writing really? Can I make the words go together? 😨

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Pretty cool, just make sure you ask a native speaker in that language to look over things before posting. I have found that some of my Spanish is too literal and no native Spanish speaker is actually going to say that. Plus each language always has little nuances you need to take into account.

19. First Fandom you wrote in? Marvel 👀 Look it was a phase dammit! 🫣 Leave me alone. 😭

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Nerdie will cheat again, because this is her post! 😆 I enjoy all my fics. Otherwise, why would I write them? But one stands above the rest. It gives me all the feels, giggles, some funny banter, smut that took a damn month to write and inspired @soft-persephone to tag me in a meme that @boliv-jenta made, Weddings 101 with Dieter.

If there’s one fic that I feel has the majority of my writing (all styles and facets) in it, Weddings 101 would be it. My humor, agnst, attempt at making a villain and sub-plots, slow burn romance with a goat as Dieter’s ride or die. 🤗 That trash panda gave me a lot so I wrote him a wild ass series. 😋

NPT: @tinytinymenace @megamindsecretlair @perotovar @pedroshotwifey @lady-bess

@djarinmuse @alltheglitterandtheroar @inept-the-magnificent @lotusbxtch

@jeewrites @rosecentaur1916 @westside-rot @jessthebaker @trulybetty

@rhoorl @musings-of-a-rose @saturn-rings-writes @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @magpiepills

@secretelephanttattoo @morallyinept @goodwithcheese

[f1amboyant]

I'm living for your Charlos and single dad Charles like please!!!! The idea is so good 🥺

Okay so I don't know if I can help with some inspiration or anything but, I need to know more about it. So here's my asks

- Whats the kid name? How old is he? Is he adopted or from a previous relationship? Like is Mpreg real in this au or Charles get to parent his child because the mother is out of the picture in a way or another?

- For Carlos now, do he fall first for Charles? Does he take extra care of making sure this kid is being great at football? Does Carlos also tries to influence them to be madridistas?

- For Charles. How old is he? When did he became a father. Was he barely adult and took full responsibility? Was he still studying and drop out or does he manage to finish his studies?

- Also is there any other drivers that will appear in this AU?

Sorry about the whole ass questions you can ignore me if I'm being stupid 😅

In reference to this post: 1-5 ideas!

Aargblfhmfqhl that’s such a great ask! Thank you so much 😭

Okay. First, don’t apologize for all those questions! ✨ I don’t have the answer to any of those (because the story is still a mere idea in the back of my mind for now) BUT it’s really helpful because now I can think about it a bit and start to flesh out this story!

Second, the idea comes mostly from this post, I don’t want to take all the credit. But I loved it so much when I first saw it! I want to write something about it at some point! 😍

Okay, now, to your questions:

Whats the kid name? NO IDEA. Something French or Italian, probably? Any suggestions anyone?

How old is he? 8

Is he adopted or from a previous relationship? From a previous relationship

Like is Mpreg real in this au or Charles get to parent his child because the mother is out of the picture in a way or another? Both are possible. But I think it would probably be mpreg. It’s very cliche, but it’s way less likely for a mother to leave her child and if she’s not in the picture, it would mean she’s dead and I don’t want to write this (there are probably a million other possibilities but this is what comes to my mind fitting this story). So mpreg (though that would not be the center of the fic at all, just a background thing that can be ignored for those who don’t like it)

For Carlos now, do he fall first for Charles? Charles falls first. Carlos has to take care of all the kids running around everywhere and he doesn’t really have the time to notice one parent in the sea of parents. On the other hand, Charles gets all the time in the world to ogle the sexy coach (‘Dad, did you see my goal, it was so cool, right? Dad? Did you see?’ ‘Hmm yeah, yeah, so cool kiddo’ Charles answers blushing because he did not see at all, too focused on the coach. Damn, Charles, be a good dad and focus on your son, dammit). Plus, seeing someone else taking care of his son, when it had been just him for so long, just stirs something deep inside Charles and warms his heart. So yeah, Charles falls first.

Does he take extra care of making sure this kid is being great at football? At first, Carlos treats him like any other kid. Then as he gets closer to Charles and his son, he tries to coach him more, to be there for him, to give him extra time. But I also imagine the kid being just as terrible at football as Charles is, and it’s endearing but it’s also driving Carlos crazy because he wants his team to win, but he wants to make Charles and the kid happy and arrrghhhh he doesn’t know what to do.

Does Carlos also tries to influence them to be madridistas? ABSOLUTELY. Cue Charles knowing nothing about football and the kid having stars in his eyes when he can talk about his favorite player with Carlos. Charles’ heart melts again.

For Charles. How old is he? 26/27 (basically how old he would be by the time I can find myself to write this 😅). No but more seriously, it’s because of your next question ->

When did he became a father. I’m thinking messy teen pregnancy, barely 18, gets knocked up with a first boyfriend that turns out to be kind of a douche (but Charles is naive and in love). So the boyfriend breaks Charles' heart and leaves him to deal with the pregnancy (and of course Charles wants to keep the baby).

Was he barely adult and took full responsibility? Yep. Barely adult yet took full responsibility. His family was a great help (his mother being all here for him and the baby).

Was he still studying and drop out or does he manage to finish his studies? With a lot of help from his family, Charles was able to finish his studies (architecture, maybe?) but it was so so so hard.

Also is there any other drivers that will appear in this AU? Yes! Pierre and Lando are the best friends obviously. Other drivers will appear. Maybe some will be other soccer parents, the second coach could be another driver. The douche boyfriend could be another driver too 🫣 No idea who anyone could be for now though. Any suggestion?

Thank you so much for all those questions. It definitely helped me brainstorm this idea a little bit and spark some inspiration. Feel free to send more (for this idea or another)!

My ask box is still open ✨

[a-legacy-not-to-be-forgotten]

Starlo for the characters!

Hell yeah, it's cowboy time!

Sexuality Headcanon: He's always given off Pansexual vibes for me.

Gender Headcanon: Trans man Starlo all the way!

A ship I have with said character: Staroba has pretty much always been one of my top 5 favorite UTY ships and that remains. I always have a bit of a soft spot for childhood friend romances, and the idea of Starlo and Ceroba understanding eachother and finally admitting their feelings for one another is just...mwah! Chef's kiss! Sometimes I self-insert myself in an OT3 with them, but I won't go there.

A BROTP I have with said character: I really love his dynamic with the Feisty Four. With their banter and shenanigans, and a pretty realistic falling out/getting back together, too! It's hard to explain, but I just really like Starlo's relationship with his pose.

A NOTP I have with said character: Ho boy, this is gonna piss a lot of people off...I am not a fan of Starlo x Dalv and it's grown stale over time for me. Before you crucify me, just note I am a man who's in a relationship with another man and Corn Yaoi just doesn't do it for me. I can get the appeal, but it just doesn't do it for me. Doesn't help that the ship tends to hold some of Ceroba's most vicious haters. Besides, I always saw Dalv as AroAce, so it clashes with my own headcanon on the guy. I can see the appeal if you like it, but I'm sorry, it just doesn't do it for me. I already removed the pairing from my SequenceShift AU for the reasons above.

A random headcanon: I get he's supposed to be, well...a star, but I like imagining a few reptilian traits on Starlo, mainly things such as a tail with a star on the end of it (give both him and Ceroba tails, dammit!) and scales. To my boyfriend and I, his patterns really reminded us of a desert collared lizard. No biggie if you don't see it the same way tho.

General Opinion over said character: Starlo is probably my second favorite character in the game behind the Roba herself and I really love him...but good fuckin lord, the fandom grossly misinterprets him as a character! Sorry girlies, but that is not just some silly, sexy Cowboy LARPer or whatnot. That is a man with some genuine issues that's driven him into being a reckless jerk, and him coming to terms with that is literally the best part about him! Guess that's the side effect of being a Tumblr Sexyman, ain't it? First Sans and now him. Fandom BS aside tho, he's still a great character.

[biblioflyer]

Finding hope in an Age of Apocalypse: maybe Xavier’s dream isn’t dead, just wounded.

X-Men ‘97 ends on a series of cliffhangers: the team split between eras, likely having to choose between helping a mortal enemy or altering history in unpredictable ways but probably for the worse, and with the present day team facing a new wave of anti-mutant sentiment and the potential for President Creed. Yet contained within this ending are seeds of hope.

This is part 5 in a series of discussions about the pessimism of the X-Men setting, its origins, its consequences, and whether that’s even a fair assessment.

Part 1 laid out some of the core conceits of the setting.

Part 2 discusses theories of historical change.

Part 3 is about the messiness of allegories.

Part 4 compares X-Men to other popular settings and their status quo or evolution.

I hold out hope the next season of ‘97 might complicate the status quo a bit. Maybe build upon Steve Rogers looking very unhappy when the Magneto protocol was authorized to show us humans and superhumans who are more willing to buck the system. President Kelly is likely to be seen as a big disappointment by idealists who want to work within the system, such as Steve. 

If ‘97 does go forward with a transition from having a President who is sympathetic to Mutants but whose ultimate priority is order to a President who is a fire breathing anti-mutant extremist, that would be a fruitful way to bring in dissenting humans and superhumans. It would be interesting to see the status quo, from the perspective of supportive non-Mutants, move from unjust but seeming to have room for reform to one that is intolerable.

It’s very much not Captain America’s show and there is no obligation to depict him in a sympathetic way in the X-Men’s corner of the setting, but adding extra dimensions to the conflict by having a broader ideological mix of Humans would offset the fatalism of the first season and the potential extra gloom of a President Creed arc by bringing a smidge of optimism that Sapiens vs Mutatis does not have to be a zero sum conflict.

I’m just personally not a fan of settings without hope. It’s what frustrated me about the way the Star Wars Sequels wiped away the achievements of the legacy characters as if they had been built on sand and without even really giving us any appreciation for what, if anything, they did achieve. It’s what made the first couple seasons of Star Trek Discovery kind of a chore, not that there wasn’t hope, but you really had to dig deep to find anything approximating the idealism of TNG. 

I know things are hard, I know the world is a mess, and I’m fine with fictional worlds being hyperbolically messy but give me hope dammit! I don’t want to come away from an epic journey feeling fatalistic about reality by finding no hope in fiction.

Which is incidentally why I want to thank the writers of ‘97 for capping off the season by having the touching moment with Scott and Cable and for Xavier being willing to die trying to break through to Magneto, even after everything Magneto had done.

Grim is okay if it's complemented by heroes being that much more heroic for contrast.

If I wanted bad people doing bad things, having bad things happen to them, and becoming worse people for it I’d reread Game of Thrones.

If I wanted all of that with superpowers, I’d pick up the original The Boys comics.

[saltminerising]

1, Even as an autistic person, I gotta say... if the FR team doesn't respect the fae facial expressions lore, why should I?

------------------------------------

2. fuck spring actually THISTLE is the best color 💯

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3. I was playing higher/lower and of the nine times the 7 card was face up, four times the face down card was 9, twice the face down card was 8, and once it was 10

I wonder what the chances of that are

------------------------------------

4. Idk if anyone even cares but the 1st anniversary cakes are such a weird stupid item like we were just given a bunch of those on the 1st anniversary and then never again even though it would make a lot more sense to give out those cakes every anniversary? My ass was a newbie at the time and accidentally converted them even though I actually wanted to keep them, we had no vault at the time, but also Crim still asks for them and I'm honestly just wishing they'd be unretired and distributed through Galore every year. C'mon let us all have some cake during a birthday.

------------------------------------

5. i saw the fandragons in clan lore ask and was reminded of something weird/funny that happened to me that i wanted to share

one time like 6 years ago i bought a pre named dragon off the ah to incorporate into my clan lore and apparently he was named after a homestuck character because someone messaged me something like "i see your sneaky homestuck fandragon, you cant hide hehehehe" and told me to add them on discord so since then i am always sure to immediately rename any pre named dragons i buy

i dont remember his exact name because i got rid of him at some point but i know it started with an e

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6. my weird pet peeve is when players turn off likes on their dragons. mate, I wanna give your dragon a star. this star isn’t even meant for you, it’s for the d r a g o n, and only the dragon. leT ME GIVE THEM A STAR DAMMIT—

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7. Aahh has anyone suggested making the which waystone notify you when you have completed pursuits to pick up?? I swear halfway through every goddamn month I remember that pursuits actually exist and then promptly forget again after picking them up. I use the waystone daily for the exact purpose it was added for: to not fucking forget about shit. I rely on it a bit too much actually so please just put pursuits in there I'm begging. I want to save up those stupid achievement coins for when they add new stuff to the shop but I'm so slow doing it because I keep forgetting aaahhhhhh

[cutekittenlady]

Tumblr Plays Pokemon White 2 - Part 5

I just need one.

Just to steady my nerves.

JUST. ONE.

GLUG

GLUG

GLUG

Ohhhh thats the good stuff.

Okay Polly. You can do this. Just walk out on that soundstage. And, i dunno, act?

Dear lord this is like third grade talen show all over again. Only this time I don't have Hugh to dig the hole.

......

The filming... actually turned out okay? It was pretty standard fare hero schlock but ah well.

And hey, i actually have a fan!

Hmmm this is going straight into my veins.

Dont tell my mom.

Your lucky I've had my lemonade hit today old man.

Welp. Guess I'm a move star now.

hehe.

Oh shoot it's dark. Uhhh is Pop Roxie still running his boat? I did say I was gonna do all the gym matches so I kinda gotta go to Castelia right? Hnngh maybe I'll come back to do more films later?

At least after getting a set of wings or something to get here and back again in a jiffy.

I wind up running to the pier in the rain.

Okay Hugh I'm here, sorry I took so long. See there was this bald guy with a really unfotunate name and-

Whaaaats going on here?

What like.... like the terrorist group? I mean lets not jump the gun here Roxie. I mean just cause theyre dressed kinda funny doesn't mean we can just jump to conclusion. Besides even if they WERE Team Plasma they wouldn't just admit to it. Nobodys that-

... Wow okay so... you guys are like... actually that dumb then?

Look I- No I get you wanna make some big dramatic speech but I- Stop cutting me off you RUDE LITTLE-

Hugh, baby, do NOT cut the Polly off when shes speaking! You know what happened in third grade.

Anyway Hugh goes off on this whole hate filled speech about how much these guys suck. And I expected some kinda edgy response but instead.

Home slice. You were chased... by Lillipup? Dude I hit a Lillipup with a bike when I was, like, five and it was flattened like a pancake. Sure, I got banned from riding for, like, ten years but my point is that anyone who runs from a Lillipup, a Lillipup right?, has no right joining a terrorist organization.

God its the third grade all over again.

Hope you have a shovel Hugh.

Oh sweetie.

We're gonna bury you.

Plasma Grunt sent out a Patrat against Bentley and you can just tell that Bentley has a chip on his shoulder over the Gym battle because hes raring to go. Patrat starts with bide after Bentley wraps him up, after that I had Bentley use growth while Patrat stored energy. Next round Patrat releases the energy and Bentley hit him with vine whip. That combined with wrap gets the little rat int he red. Patrat manages to forestall hi defeat with detect but one return later and its over.

After defeating the Patrat Bentley learns Leaf Tornado.

The Plasma grunt and his buddies have enough sense to run off before we can really get going and run for their lives.

Its okay Hugh you didn't have a shovel anyway.

Uh... Pretty sure thats a YOU job? Your the gym leader here.

However Roxie gives me the HM for Cut before running off.

Well Hugh guess we have a free HM now soooooo

Deep inhale through nose

Yeah okay.

Your lucky were friends Hugh.

The things I do for friendship.

Thats what I DOING! GAWD

Look its not like we're even going to find them! If they're really in a terrorist cell theres no way they're just going to be standing out in the open like a jackass saying "Come and get me Polly"

.... Bentley.

Go loose buddy.

Hey look its a purrloin.

And now its dead.

Just like old times. Old times being, like, the day before yesterday. Or whatever.

Aaaand the Plasma grunt runs away.

Hugh get her!

I... you... She ran RIGHT PAST YOU!

YOU HAVE A PIG WHO BREATHES FIRE!

wHaT... i DONt.... THIS IF YOUR VENDETTA!

oh please do tell

Okay she said they have a boat. Castelia City has a port. Hmm Okay.

I... we were JUST there Hugh! We'd have been better off just waiting in Virbank for them to come back and then jumping out at them from behind a trash can! Or dragging them into an alley to get info or something!

Arceus Dammit Hugh! This is YOUR revenge quest! I'm just tagging along cause Prof. Juniper asked me to complete... the... pokedex....

You know what Hugh, you uh, you go on ahead. I have some stuff I gotta... take... care of....

Shit shit shit how many pokemon do I have to catch?!

Ran into a shaking bush and caught an audino on the way to the pokemon center. Shove THAT into the PC for now, what else....

Route 19... Route 19 gotta start with route 19. Habitat mode dont fail me now!

GOT IT!

YOU. IN BALL. NOW

DANGIT YOU ARE NOT GETTING IN THE BALL

ARIES GT OUT THERE AND PARALYZE THAT CRETIN!

YES

IN BALL

CAUGHT

MOVING ON

DAMMIT OF COURSE THE FIRST PURRLOIN I FIND HAS LIMBER

AAAAAAAHHHHH

[fair-night-starry-tears]

I forgot I was doing the infection au but I talked about it with @anxious-twisted-vampire months ago about the concept of how this would work magic wise

Consider the blot is almost connected to a virus that spread like a plague. It makes people overblot even though the little magic being used, or the amount of stress/overwhelming emotions. This ��virus” has began to form into something much worse. People would feel exhausted, dazed out, feel like they were spun, and lose consciousness over their actions. Such as forgetting their own thoughts, food, and life in the process. The virus has infused itself into the magic system, and will spread into the brain until the only thing their host will think is to feast on magic to gain more energy to infect others. If you attack it physically, you’re good as infected. But if you don’t use magic and range attack at a far distance. You’re safe.

This “virus” is weak to magic, yes it is connected to magic. But only those who were immune to them. There is a cure for this, but it all lives in the 7 domain of the once heroic 7 homes. Hidden with a riddle, and if gathered. Can make a substance of immunity to overrule the virus and “kill” it completely. But there is a catch. You would have to make a huge batch and the domains doesn’t contain that much.

Stage: Exposed, exactly as described (curable)

Stage 1: lack of sight and acute hearing (100% curable)

Stage 2: signs of nose bleeding and twitching, slowness (100% curable)

Stage 3: Magic overflowing and blot patches start to form (50/50 curable)

Stage 4: Blot overforming/virus taking a darker form to cause the body to have long limbs and black scleras (lost cause)

Stage 5: Infection complete take over, someone will “overblot” but will feast on anyone or anything to presume power. Anyone with magic source will be harmed on sight (run away)

And funfact. Crowley did make some for his family to survive. But I refuse to be peaceful for Darling and she didn’t take the beverage laced with the immunity so it went to Yuu instead. So Darling has a risk chance to be infected and turn into a monster.

Though I will make her either immune due to her overblot fusing with her phantom. She has more docile control over. But this also gives her a dangerous risk if the virus infects her blot. She will either be hostile and jaded, or break free from its nightmarish effects.

Dire will actually be useful and help Yuu and co to get more of the ingredients for the antidote. But trust me, this man will suffer a lot of consequences with many choices is him protecting his family then himself and everyone around him over his own life. SO KEEP HIS RECKLESS ASS ALIVE IF YOU WANNA LIVE DAMMIT

Cuz trust me. If he’s even infected, it will not a pretty sight to know the only person who knows how to get through each 7 riddles and come back ALIVE to get either ingredients will be the last hope of survival

@adrianasunderworld @mangacupcake @writing-heiress @the-weirdos-mind @skboba-stars @nproduction626 @rose-tea-and-strawberries @anxious-twisted-vampire @yukii0nna @achy-boo @abyssthing198 @zexal-club @liviavanrouge

Tagline: Infected Magic

[kactiworld]

KACTIWORLD - CHAPTER 5 - USURPER - C-SIDE

“Today right here in the 44 west 12th street square of Desarnia, our Mayor, David Plaqueman will be giving a speech! With the election so soon, it is quite a wonder why he would plan this on such short notice. On another note, the neighboring country across the Getler Sea has been accused of dumping radioactive waste into the ocean. More on that soon, back to you station 15.”

“Alright, we’re good…”

“Jesus. Thank god. This place is starting to reek, let’s go.”

That news reporter is right, it does smell here. But that can’t stop me from sticking around. The speech starts in 15 minutes. In 30 minutes I have to be in that spot, which means I have 20 minutes to do a little investigating. I know that Darius is backstage. This killer I’m after has to be connected to him somehow, he just has to be, there is no doubt about it now. 

Walking into the square, I could see many radicalized citizens that seemed to be dawning that same tragedy mask that the gang members were wearing at the warehouse. There was a stage with an empty podium, the backstage section of the set could be seen just slightly, and inside was Darius, just as I expected. What I didn’t expect was what I saw him doing. He was shaking hands with officials of the city? Of the country? I decided to go in closer. Sneaking around to the back of the stage I tried my best to hide my face from other citizens that could have been onlooking. 

I could only slightly hear Darius and the others that were inside when putting my ear to the wall. I looked up and saw trusses that held up lights that weren’t in use. I tried my best to try and climb up to see if I can get a good look at what is going on. Eventually with the help of some misplaced boxes and water drums, I was able to vault myself onto the wall and perch on an iron truss. There are 20 minutes left until I have to go.

“Darius, sir, you don’t know how excited we are to have you in our ranks as a governor, and mayor. The president is extremely uhm… pleased. With this decision.”

“I would hope that he is. I worked very, very hard to get to the position that I am now in, Mister…”

“Mister…?”

There was an awkward silence.

“Ugh, tell me your fucking name, god dammit!”

“O- oh! Oh! It’s Joysing, Governor Joysing, sir…”

“Joysing…”

“Sir, we talked yesterday.”

“Did we? We did! Yes. Yes ahem. We did, officer Joysing.”

“Governor.”

“Right.”

This was very weird, Darius was acting strange, not like the way I saw him a couple nights ago. 

“Yeah John! The weather is blazing hot today here in the square, and in just about 5 minutes we are getting ready to hear a speech given to us by our Mayor, David Plaqueman. Make sure to keep a water on you and try to stay cool in this hot weather! Back to you in the station, John!”

Sweat rolled down my forehead and pooled at the tip of my nose. I was as still as a gargoyle looking down at the walls of a castle. My hands started to shake and slip from how wet my palms were from sweat.

“Sir, Darius. The speech is starting.”

This isn’t a speech for the mayor. It’s a speech for Darius. He is the one that is going to be walking out there. That is when the reality of the situation had punched me in the face. Darius was taking over the entire city. Not by drug trades or by illegal weapons, but by literally taking control of the city, as the mayor. And he’s a governor now?

My hand slightly slipped and the lights shook a bit. Darius stopped and slowly looked up at the light down the truss that shook. His eyes scanned all the way down the truss to where I was slowly. I had to get out of here. I jumped down to the door, but right before I was about to walk away, I heard a door open behind me…

“Chris Harrington? The star detective…? What a surprise!”

My heart was beating out of my chest. I turned around, and there he was. The six foot 2 monstrosity of a man towering over me. 

“I’ve heard so many good things about you. Like that murderer in 1990?!”

“Uhm. Yeah. That guy was a lot of work! Phew! A lot of sleepless nights on that one.”

“Yeah I bet. You know, Chris…”

Darius put a hand on my shoulder. He had gloves on, and I could feel and hear the leather squeeze as he gripped my shoulder.

“I’ve been a fan for a long, long time. What are you doing here?”

“Well, you see. I…”

“Sir, Darius. The speech!”

“Oh. Well, I wish we could’ve talked more, Chris.”

Darius patted my shoulder and tilted his head. For a second I could’ve sworn I could have seen the light reflecting off his eyes, creating the illusion of two small white dots as eyes, surrounded by the dark holes of endless void that rests within the inside of his mask. A chill rose up my back and throughout my entire body. 

“...fuck.”

I walked towards the street alley that the killer wanted me to go to at this time. I had about 15 minutes left to get there. The speech started and I looked back to watch. Darius walked out on the stage and tapped the microphone. 

“Hello, citizens of Desarnia. Some of you most likely know me. And for the ones who choose to ignore the world around themselves, you do not. My name is Darius Graves, and I will be giving Mayor Plaqueman’s speech today.”

“Darius went on with some government drivel, like he isn’t a massive criminal, but what are we supposed to do about it? He controls everything, he can literally do whatever he wants. I’m surprised he hasn’t done this yet.

I walked over to the street alley that the killer told me to be at. It was time. Am I going to meet the killer? Am I going to be… No. No that couldn’t be the case. 

Just as my watch hit 1:30 pm. I heard the sound of an alarm clock go off in a nearby pile of trash. I ran over and uncleared it, thinking it could be related to the killer. What I found rocked my core so badly that my hair grayed at that very moment. 

A man, mid 40s it seems, gasping for air as he held onto his forearm. He was pretty fit for his age and had a fully grown beard around his jawline that was in the process of turning white. 

“Sir, are you alright?”

“Awha? Who the fuck are you? Wha… What are you doing here.”

“Let me see your arm sir.”

I reached for his arm and he swatted me back, hitting me in the face, most definitely leaving a red mark on my cheek. 

“Get the FUCK AWAY FROM ME!”

I sat on the floor, shocked. Just who the hell is this guy? When he swatted me away he lifted his arm. He had a bunch of holes, as if he had been pricked by a cactus. I knew it. It was the killer…

“Sir, let me see your wallet, please!”

“Ugh, you’re very annoying, you know that?”

The stranger slid his wallet over to me, if I was correct about this, then he should be a gang member…

I opened the wallet and looked inside. It. This guy. He was.

This guy is Darius Graves.

“What the… No. No, that's impossible. I just talked to Dar…”

“That stupid ass kid. Ugh.”

“Stupid kid?”

Darius coughed up blood and foam. “The kid. Up there.” he pointed to the stage.

“... With me in charge, I can promise you all, there will be change around here! Aren’t you tired of the police not taking care of the crime around here?!”

“Wait… So that’s the…”

“Yeah…” Darius sighs. “That’s my son, Karter.”

“...AND THEN IN THIS CITY, DESARNIA WILL NOT JUST BE KNOWN AS THE DESERT CITY, BUT INSTEAD A CITY OF POWER, AND OF WEALTH!”

“Wait. Did you say Karter?”

Darius coughed more, the light in his eyes faded. “Yes you fuckin’ idiot. My son, Karter. He came back from the grave to haunt and kill me. And now this.”

I could feel and hear my eyes sink into the back of my skull. Karter… Karter Graves…? That’s the killer's name? And that is. The friend that Alice has…

“ACCEPT ME AS YOUR NEW MAYOR, YOUR NEW LEADER, AND I WILL GUIDE YOU ALL TO GREATNESS, AND NEVER ABANDON THOSE IN NEED!”

The crowd roared. They couldn’t get enough of him. The crowd was happy for this guy… Do they know who the hell he is?!

“Darius! What the hell is going on?!-”

I looked back. Darius had died. He drowned and choked on his own blood and spit. 

“Yes! YES! I WILL BE HERE FOR YOU! AND PROUD OF IT! Yes… Me, Darius Graves, as your new leader.”

CHAPTER 5 END

[silverusso]

Been thinking about terry spoiling Mike and Daniel in kk3 or maybe the 90s they just are both his little sugar babies that he fucks on the regular and they are both so cute and sassy and he just loves watching them go at each other which leads to rough making out and sex and he is just enjoying both his boys like he loves them both and spoiling them and then in cobra Kai they just all take cobra Kai away from Johnny and all run it together

I have had an idea similar to this that's just been stewing in the back of my head basically since season 5. (Can't say whether I'll ever write it) but here's the premise:

Set after the AVT -Mike still loses- but Terry pays to smooth things over so Mike & Cobra Kai don't get banned. He also pays to keep the loss hush-hush so it doesn't tarnish Mike's reputation bc he plans to sponsor Mike as Cobra Kai's poster boy (Mike's a national champ after all and already pretty well known considering he's in karate magazines) but with someone like Silver sponsoring him? He's really living the life, flying all over the place to compete in bigger and better tournaments, doing interviews and photoshoots and commercials etc ((he's my boy and and i will give him everything ck didn't dammit!)) He and Daniel both live with Terry and Danny's no less spoiled than Mike is, but per an agreement with Mr. Miyagi, Daniel doesn't compete like Mike does. Even so, he can do whatever else he wants (after all, Terry can and will finance anything Daniel could ask for). But Terry still has to make things right for Kreese so he gives him back his dojo in the Valley and even gives him back his star student Johnny (look i didn't really think that hard about how he manages to pull that one off. maybe brainwashing or spells are involved idk💀) anways, happy ending for everyone more or less except Johnny I guess lmao.

[maymeowmoo]

Once again I have been engulfed in the need to write something regarding the new episode “SMG4: The Inspection”. I kinda wrote this like a live commentary sooooo watching the vid and reading these silly notes might make this better but meh whatevs! I am writing this for fun anyways =w=

First impression from the thumbnail? Smg3 is front and center = This is gonna be neat~

0:36-0:44 Pigstep with Swag was something I didn’t know I needed until now.

0:55-1:04 The plushie bit worked dammit. My humor is broken.

1:08 something interesting to note -> Smg3 said “You can help hide this body”. He is actually just requesting help for once with no convoluted way of making it some ‘deal’ or smtg. Maybe the stress over an inspection made him say this or he is developing idk but I found it worthy to point out!

2:38 AAAH idk why but Smg3 still calling Four “his assistant” makes me happy :)

3:21-3:34 Not me thinking this was gonna be a “Emesis Blue” reference. AHHH this episode is so fluffy with Four helping Three and nobody can tell me otherwise.

4:29-4:39 Man poor Mario :/

4:40 This? This is when I realized. THIS IS A STAR TRIO EPISODE YAY!

5:55-6:14 Okay this? This is good. I like this joke ALOT.

6:45-7:17 OH the DRAMA! The TWIST! What a wonderful episode.

8:10-8:18 AaAAAAa! Meggy as scout <3 This is so cool. Wonder if issa reference to Mimi the sentry tho >.>

8:52-8:57 I’ll be honest… I know a tiny bit abt TF2 and I think “[…] a fighting spirit!” won’t help you win against a soldier player, just saying =_=‘

9:06-9:15 Awh :)

10:16-10:21 Silly ending but also so fitting.

Jokes: [Wanted to give it a 10 outta smtg rating similarly to my other post. However I realized I need to first define what would be a 10 and what would be a 0 to do that… OOF] I really liked the jokes in this one! The ‘atmosphere’ of this episode overall was also nice. Lighthearted fun and silliness is my typa thing :3 Deffo would have a high rating!

Closing statement -> I was surprised that this episode was so good idk I had lower expectations going in for some reason? I love how it turns out to be a TF2 episode tho~

[Note: Decided to add the tag #Anons_C.A.R since u know, when I write my commentary/analysis/review stuff I wanna have a easy way to search it ig + man I want my laptop back. Writing this without it was hard x_x’]

[burgercheese1812]

SPOILERS!!!!!!!

Read at your own risk!

My emotions/thoughts through painted devils, because I just finished that shit and holy jamole-

(This took me days to write help 💀)

The seventh lie: (yes it has to be in sections or no one will be able to follow it, not even myself)

YES IT HAS FINALLY ARRIVED

OOOO THE COVER JUST *chefs kiss*

NO DAMMIT VANJA GO BACK

DAMMIT VANJA

Don’t scam the people, don’t scam the people- of course she did.

Hm making up a story about a god, yes this seems completely sane and won’t have future repercussions.

*fast forwards two months* Dammit Vanja.

Don’t go into the barn. DON’T GO INTO THE BARN- of course.

EMERIC!! YAY!

oh… Emeric… 😐

awkward.

YES I’VE MISSED THIER BANTER!!!

*sheep third wheeling is a vibe*

*Enter ScarMad*

Hi, yes hello, what do you mean you cLaiMeD mY bOy eMeRiC?? 😃

*Emeric proceeds to be high-fived in the chest, with red permanent marker*

*Enter PrOcToR KiRkLiNg* p.s: I already hate her.

I hope Vanja cuts KiRkLiNg down a few pegs. Ok a lot of pegs.

Who is Helga and where did she come from? *proceeds to knock KiRkLiNg down a few pegs* I like her.

THE RYE ROLL SCENE IS EVERYTHING 🤌 SASSY HELGA MY BELOVED

#wish I could have seen KiRkLiNg standing on that bridge looking like a shocked fish as her lunch falls into the river

Oh how I wish I could go on a lovely date with my significant other to see murals of human sacrifices that may or may not soon involve them. Oh to be in love.

Ah yes Vanja, because I’m sure just screaming in a cave is going to summon- god dammit it ScarMad.

HA VIRGIN (I can’t say anything)

wait hang on so ScarMad claims people who haven’t… done it yet? Or have no intention of ever doing it? That smells a tad… *sniffs the air* Acephobic.

#cancel the Acephob ScarMad 2023 #acerights

“Human measuring stick I’m inexplicably fond of” I’m sure Emeric loves you to Vanja

Ah yes let’s all just casually stroll up to the other 5 brother and ask for them to participate in a BLOOD SACRIFICE that will go down swimmingly I’m sure!

GIVE EMERIC SOME SHEET VANJA HE’S COLD GOD DAMMIT!

*un- PG 13 -ifies your Vaneric*

PLEASE NOT THE PREGNANCY TROPE- oh ok.

Love Helga being a big sister figure in Vanja’s life. (What the poor naive dingbat did not know is that this is what we call ✨foreshadowing✨)

penis.

Great now I’m going to spend the next week wondering how the hell to pronounce blesséd

Of course KiRkLiNg has to come as well

I love Vikram with all my heart.

GHOSTBUSTERS!

WhAt dO yOu mEaN yOu dOn’T HaVe gOdMoThEr’S????

Of course Vanja drunkenly yelled at one of the brothers

The sixth lie:

Vanja throws horseshit at Emeric, off to a great start 😃👍

Wouldn’t be a book with Vanja without some good ol’ Vanja fashion robbery

Cue the Robin Hood montage

Emeric is loving this.

GHOSTBUSTERS! Pt.2

Never seen the movie but I’m 95% sure this is how Annabelle started

Didn’t always have rails- OHS ‘bout to have a field day☝️😃

SISTER??????

BUM BUM BAAAAAAAAAAAAA

The fifth lie:

IRMGARD WHAT THE HELL??

I’M READY TO THROW HANDS WITH THIS GIRL WHAT THE ACTUAL-

Oh right sister.

Ok let’s leave the absolute HORRORS of Vanja’s back scars and go back to this cliffhanger. Starting with:

WHAT THE FU-

Oh she’s just crazy ok. *mightily suspicious*

I will admit I was fully sucked in by the ant proverb-

Great the cult has followed them

The fourth lie:

Ah… brothels…

JUSTICE FOR AGNETHE!!

“The worst mistake of your life wasn’t upsetting me. It was starting a fight with her” SLAY EMERIC YOU TELL MEAN OLD MOTHER HUBBARD

Emeric has… questions…. 👀

Wish i could solve my problems with a giant ruby

Bath. I will elaborate no further.

THE SCARS!! THIS SCENE MADE ME SOB OF COURSE YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL VANJA 😭

Normal people: “i think I love them.” VANJA THE RIZZLER SCHMIDT (Ros) :“If every star were a reason I care for him—that’s how I feel, like I carry too many stars in me to count, like my skin might burst with the enormity of it all, like if I gather them all up, the only name I could give this is love.”

Thank you very much for teaching me to waltz whilst also teaching me organised crime

*gets called ugly in front of her sole mate* Vanja: dead bugs for you

JSDJDJEHFHDUSUDUEHDFBRHCUSHDBF SHE IS THEIR SISTER HOW DARE YOU DANGLE THAT PLOT POINT IN FRONT OF MY FACE ONLY TO TRICK ME AND THEN CHUCK THAT EMOTIONAL DUMP-TRUCK ON ME, YOU @what-eats-owls ARE MAGNIFICENT PLEASE CONTINUE

The third lie:

Excuse me?

Dead? HER MOTHER IS DEAD? 😃

Ozkar: tells Vanja her mother is dead, also Okzar: ew don’t be sad yucky

HER RIBBON?? THAT CLEARLY IS IMPORTANT TO HER?? I NEED TO PUT ON MY DOUBLE SEEING GLASSES 😳 👓🤏JUST TO SEE THROUGH THIS ABSOLUTE BULLSHI-

Ozkar gets worst brother of the year award. Change my mind, oh wait you can’t.

Love that Emeric can just immediately finds Vanja BEST BOYFRIEND

YES EMERIC’S FAMILY

Emeric talking loveingly about his family is giving both Vanja AND me life

NO NO GET OUT IF EMERIC YOU RUDE OLD HAG HE’S CLEARLY TAKEN

LET GO OF VANJA!!!!

NOT THE ANGST—THE ANGST 😭 DAMN YOU, YOU GLOWY RED BIATCH AND ALGEBRA OR WHAT EVER YOUR DAMN NAME IS FOR GIVING VANJA THIS TRAUMA (Adalbrecht but I can’t spell)

Manacles? 🤨📸

EMERIC WANTS TO KEEP VANJA SAFE FROM HIM 😭 GET YOURSELF A PERSON WITH THIS LEVEL OF DEDICATION

honestly if my future partner doesn’t take paralysis pills when they’re possessed by an evil old glowy witch thing then I don’t want ‘em ✋🙄

THIS CRUSTY DUSTY ASS CRIMSON BIATCH HAS BLOCKED VANJA FROM SEEING HER GOD MOTHERS? This lady better be burnt at the stake and hung drawn and quartered when this is over or I swear to whatever is above that I will cross universes and do it myself.

Of course Vanja’s brother has been taken by an immortal sky women because, well because this was all just a tad too easy

The Imperial Abbey if Truth sounds like the most aesthetically pleasing place and goodness I want SO badly to go there now-

YES DEATH AND FORTUNE YAY!!!!

ScarMad clearly has to go back to preschool BECAUSE SHE HASNT HAD THE PERSONAL SPACE TALK YET, GET OUT OF MY BOY-

Cool. Emeric sleepy = no witchy

That was meant to rhyme :/

My poems aren’t as good as Emeric’s

Also. EMERIC HAS POEMS??? PLEASE SHOW ME I MUST SEE 👹👹

Part 3:

THE ABBESS HAS CANDLES ON HER HEAD? She is so cool what the-

AND SHE’S ONLY A SIDE CHARACTER?

Girlboss fr

ScarMad the fabricated low gOd is in fact not a low god and is instead an… old wheat spirit thing?

Emeric really hates horses part 34

Alone? Vanja was alone at the end? I swear to all that is everything EMERIC BETTER NOT DIE-

Math crimes. (I shall be using all those jokes in the foreseeable future)

Emeric needs to be invited to do some money laundering STAT.

AWWW SIBLING MOMENT

this book really is just an emotional roller coaster, except every once in a while they chuck water on you when you least expect it, just to add to the fun emotional experience.

Cue a lot of legal talk that went right over my head

HAHAHAHA SHE GOT ARRESTED HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA-

YES AND THE GREEN HAND GETS THE uh, BUILDING AND JONIZA AND THEIR DAD GOT THE MONEY AND-

and now Vanja has to go get her brother from the sky lady

The second lie:

RAGNE

RAGNERAGNERAGNERAGNEGRANGE-

I’msohappythatmyfavouritelittleshapshifterisback

Can you tell I love Ragne?

VANJA’S GOING TO RIDE RAGNE

like… a horse…

WITH WINGS???

on the feet…?

I swear everytime I think Ragne couldn’t get any cooler SHE BLOODY GETS COOLER-

Sky lady.

I love sky lady.

There are so many cool characters in this book I just- AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

The Race! WHO SHALL WIN???

DAMN IT SCARMAD PISS OFF-

A tie? Nice 😎

Vanja has to ride with the Hunt for two weeks? Ok coolcoolcool definitely can’t see this going wrong in the foreseeable future-

She didn’t tell Emeric. 😐

VANJA’S GONNA MET HER FAMILY

And yet another scene that almost made me cry

SHE HAS SO MUCH FAMILY?

THE WEDDING

I love Vanja and her sisters bonding through dressing her up

OMG EMERIC SEEING VANJA ALL DRESSED UP WITH MAKE-UP I- 😭😭😭

Jeezus crickey can ScarMad leave Vanja alone FOR FIVE BLOODY MINUTES??

“What is wrong with you, why are you red??”

the first lie:

Love that Vanja’s whole family just drops everything to help her 😭

I’ve done and am I currently doing a lot of crying and I’m not even at the end yet?

KiRkLiNg is being… tolerable? Perhaps I was wrong about her. Maybe I judged her to quickly? (Later I regretted ever thinking these words)

Just realised I haven’t mentioned Ambrozia (?) a lot and I would just like to say, girlboss©️

GHOSTBUSTERS! Pt.3

NO RAGNE

And today on Vanja’s list of low gods to befriend is moss lady

the goat scene. I will now go have nightmares now thank you very much.

JUST LEAVE THEM ALONE ! STOP TELEPORTING THEM

she won’t let them up the bridge. she won’t let them get the anchor.

I have since fallen off the edge of my seat and am lying on the floor reading as fast as I possibly can

Ah yes, the only sane option, jump off the bridge into the jaws of a hellhound 👏👏

Emeric really is ride or die huh

THEY- NO. ON THE RIVER BANK?????

SCANDALOUS!!!!!

…

I take it back please Emeric is just the ride NOT THE DIE I REPEAT PLEASE NOT THE DIE

GIVE HIM BACK YOU INSUFFERABLE RED CANDLESTICK

I am crying with Vanja

HELL YES BRUNNE LETS GOOOOOOOOO

YES GIRLBOSS IS BACK ON HER FEET GO GO GO

The actual red maiden was just sitting in a cave CRYING THIS WHOLE TIME? I say, whilst sitting in my dark room after sobbing through most of this book

YES THE FINAL ASSAULT PUT SCARMAD IN HER PLACE

…

what in. the frick frack diddly dack, fuggle nuggles bloody HELL DID SHE JUST SAY???

MARTHE???

HER.

MOTHER????????

HER MOTHER????????

YOU’RE TELLING ME. THAT HER MOTHER. ORCHESTRATED ALL OF THIS. JUST BECAUSE VANJA WAS GOING TO BE HAPPY??????

SHE’S READY TO SACRIFICE HER WHOLE FAMILY?????

911 child protection services?

Just Marthe dangling Emeric over a hungry hell hound ready to drop him in, Mother in laws am I right?

Gonna buy therapy for Vanja, Emeric, (Marthe can rot) and then myself.

HAHAHAHAHAHAAH GO DEATH GO FORTUNE THE TRUE PARENTS MUAHAHHAAHAHAHAHA

this all brings me great satisfaction.

BACK INTO THE LATERN AND STRAIGHT INTO THE HELLHOUNDS MOUTH HA

SLAAAAAAAAAAAAY 💅(literally)

Ooooooo yeah 😬 makes sense that the town would lowkey hate Vanja

They get to have a dance 🥺🥺 (one that isn’t threaten by a glowing red demon mother)

Oh. 😳

HELL YEAH!!!!!!!!

Slay they deserve that.

Water break before the end 🥲

Take back EVERYTHING that I rethought about KiRkLiNg, girl still a baitch

Ofc KiRkLiNg would still want Vanja gone WHAT DID I EVEN THINK-

Vanja.

No.

No Vanja. Don’t do that.

DON’T THINK LIKE THAT VANJA

GOD DAMN IT VANJA STOP

PLEASE SAY HE HEARD THAT, EMERIC HEARD IT BEFORE HE FELL UNCONSCIOUS PLEASE

EMERIC SHE LOVES YOU SHE SAID IT!

VANJA NO

KIRKLING DAMN YOU!

SHE HATES EMERIC??????

WAIT WOAH HOLD UP KIRKLING HATES EMERIC??

VANJA STOP NO!

BRUNNE NO!

…

Screaming crying throwing up.

After the book i just lay on my bed clutching the book sobbing. Then i stopped sobbing and just lay there.

Truely a magnificent book and even this happens to pop up on your fyp and you read all the way down here then:

READ THE BLOODY BOOK! GO! RIGHT NOW! BUY IT! READ IT!

Gonna go reread it myself, I just love crying my eyes out 😗✌️, no but really the book is just amazing and I wish I could read it for the first time again. Thank you so much @what-eats-owls you are truly a magnificent writer and I cannot WAIT for book 3, thank you so much.

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC REVIEW: His Scandalous Lessons by Katrina Kendrick

3.5/5. OUT NOW.

Vibes: seduction lessons, gentle hero/traumatized heroine, instalove

Heat Index: 7/10

Anne needs help finding a husband--it's the only way she can escape her abusive father and worse fiancee. She offers notorious rake and political blackmailer (and enemy of her father) Richard a deal: if he teaches her how to seduce a husband, she'll give him information he needs. The problem? She may be, however unintentionally, seducing Richard.

This is an interesting one. It got off to a really good start. I like the characters, and they have good chemistry. I'm definitely intrigued about the rest of the series, and will most likely be checking it out. But it went by very quickly. This would have benefited from more page time, and for that matter, more time luxuriating in the romance. Anne and Richard get together fast, and the story takes a pretty dark turn from there--one I expected, but even then it felt tonally dissonant from the frothy, heady love story I'd read up until then.

I know this book was published in a different form earlier, and I wonder if it was any longer. As it is, this is compelling and makes plenty of good points about nineteenth century politics and the abuse suffered by women. But it's pretty rushed.

Quick Takes:

--Just as a heads up... when I say this gets dark, it gets pretty dark. Emotional, verbal, physical, and sexual abuse are discussed and occur (and it has been occurring for a very long time). I didn't think this was over the top, and I feel it was sensitively handled. However, read with caution.

--One thing I really enjoyed was Richard's friend Caro (not because of the name similarity, but it helped) and all of the nude paintings she did... starring Richard. More books where the heroes pose for nude paintings! More books where the heroes have female friends and it's cool and chill and nobody is weird about it! I definitely want to read Caro's book, which I think comes out next year. Marriage in trouble? Yes please.

--I hate the term "instalove", because I often feel that what people are referring to is instalust. I honestly don't mind instalust when done well; it's the love part I want to see happen gradually. Because the first half of this book, when the falling in love part takes place, is SO quick, this did feel pretty instant. Richard is really, really soft with Anne--and yes, he's a nice guy, but it kind of feels like he's falling for her super fast. And if there had been more to the relationship, more trouble and friction, that may have worked. But the love story itself is pretty smooth.

--On another note, I will say... for a nOTORIOUS ROGUE, Richard is pretty sweet. Not that a notorious rogue has to be the worst person ever, but at points this book seemed SO aware of its publication date. Richard is super talky about consent, and like--I want this book to have good consent politics. I do not need the hero explaining consent. It felt awkward.

That said, otherwise he was very hot, and I enjoyed the fact that he got weird and cranky when he hadn't been laid in a while. More of this behavior please.

--This all sounds very critical, but honestly--if you want a good romance and you're okay with things being a bit fast, you'll probably love this. The writing is good. It's hot. It's tender. I liked a lot of it. I'll be reading more. I just think that this installment could have used a bit of work.

The Sex:

Speaking of, this was good. It obviously begins pretty early, and there are several scenes that aren't RIDICULOUSLY explicit, but are very much explicit. And it begins with a gazebo moment that is QUITE impetuous. The best part is that he's very grumpy and fucked up about it after because they aren't together and he's trying to help her find a different man, but he can still taste her in his mouth!!! DAMMIT!!!

A flawed but nice read, I think this book shows Katrina Kendrick's talent, but would benefit from some expansion and a bit of further development.

Thanks to NetGalley and Aria for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

[slutforop81]

IF WE HAD 5 MORE MINUTES (chapter 4)

warnings: talking about vomiting, angst, fluff

What she hasn't gotten used to, however, is the constant vomiting. Emphasis on constant. It's been just over a week since she first emptied the contents of her stomach into the sink in the downstairs bathroom, but it's just getting worse. It feels like every time she's puked her guts and then some into the toilet there's another brick weighing down her stomach, bile burning her throat. Eventually, she gives in and drags a pillow and blanket into the bathroom she shares with Finny and camps out in the tub.

When Finny finds her there, cocooned in blankets in the porcelain tub, half-asleep and drooling just a bit, he does two things. First, he laughs. Second, he helps Lily up and before she can even protest, she's in the fucking doctor's office with Finny’s fingers tracing patterns on the back of her hand, feeling more nauseous than she ever did in her little bath fort.

But it's nothing. The doctor checks her vitals, asks about her symptoms, tells her to get lots of rest, drink lots of fluids and take some Advil. That's it.

Finny’s glare on the way home nearly burns a hole in the side of Lily’s head.

It's been four days of following the doctor's orders to an exact , but the pain in Lily’s head is worse than ever, like her brain is going to come oozing out her ears any second. Finny nearly laughs till he cries at the analogy, but still follows the outburst with a, "Sorry, baby. Here, let me help," and resumes massaging Lily’s scalp with gentle fingers. It helps more than Lily cares to admit, but the second Finny’s fingers are gone the pain seems to triple, so extreme at times she sees stars.

"Gonna make you another doctor's appointment in the morning," Finny mumbles later that evening when they're curled up under the covers, seeing how long they can procrastinate until Finny has to go make them something to eat. "Hate seeing you like this."

"Me too," lily grumbles, burying her face in a pillow and trying to ignore the tears prickling at her eyes because it fucking hurts, dammit, and no matter how much Paracetamol she swallows it never ceases and she's never experienced pain this bad for such an extended period of time and she just wants it to stop.

"Want me to make dinner now?" Finny suggests, sitting up on the couch.

"In a little bit," she says, knocking Finny’s elbows out from underneath him so he falls back onto the couch with a quiet chuckle. "Just stay here a while."

A while turns out to be something like half an hour in which Lily drifts in and out of consciousness while Finny cuddles her. Then, without warning he's saying, "Gonna make dinner now, babe," and before Lily can protest he's gone, and she is cold and alone.

The pain in her head is still very much present, but she gets up very slowly and follows Finny downstairs to the kitchen where he’s rattling around in the cupboard. His face lights up adorably when he finds the gleaming silver spot he's apparently been looking for, setting it in the stove and fiddling with the knobs before becoming aware of Lily’s presence.

"You should rest," he says simply.

"Wanna stay with you and pick up on your magnificent culinary skills," she mumbles into Finny’s shirt, lower lip out in a pout and she knows Finny can't say no to that.

[silkiemae]

Glow by Raven Kennedy

My Rating: 4.5/5

Wow, that ending was WILDE. I really enjoyed this book. I loved reading about Auren's journey to embrace her magic and to find out what kind of life she wants. And I adore Slade and how he bolsters her and wants her to succeed. Their relationship is constantly making me smile/tear up. Raven Kennedy excels at that, tbh. Even though Osrik and Rissa had such few chapters in this book, I gobbled up what little we were given. I wish we were given far more than we got with them. I understand this is Auren's story, but god dammit, Raven, you can't just throw that couple at me and not give me just as much with them as you give with Slade and Auren. >.< 

The relationships in this series are one of the things I like most. I love the relationship between Auren and Digby. Honestly, he makes me cry so much. I love how protective he is of her and how they basically adopted each other, and he only stayed in the Sixth Kingdom to protect her. Gruff, grumpy middle-aged men with their sassy rebellious adopted daughters is one of my favorite tropes ever. I even really liked the relationship between Auren and Milly(?). Up until Auren's unfortunate accident, I thought it was so sweet. I love the people who adopt Auren, tbh. It was like she got a wacky hedgewitch grandmother she didn't even know to want. 

Judd and Lu are too cute. I can't tell if their relationship is purely platonic or if they're flirting with one another, but either way, I love their friendship. I hope it stays platonic because seeing a well-written friendship between a man and a woman is always lovely. 

The story about Slade's background breaks my heart. Raven Kennedy sold me on him, tbh. I adore Elore and am so sad about what she had to go through. The parallels in family dynamics between Midas and Slade are fascinating. Midas had an abusive father and was abandoned by his mother. Slade also had an abusive father but had a mother and a younger brother who showed him love and affection. Midas didn't have that, so he grew up hating women and being a general sack of garbage. 

Now, the one thing I have to complain about. The only reason this book doesn't get five stars from me is that I find the dirty talk during the sex scenes to be so cringey. The written sex itself is fine, but any time Slade opens his mouth, I want to crawl out of my skin. Listen, he is the perfect book boyfriend to me 90% of the time, but he's the type of guy where you put your hand over his mouth to shut him up. Honestly, though, he probably would be into that, so...it's okay. I never want him to talk about milking his dick again. Nor do I want him to say that Auren's pussy is quivering ever again like please, for the love of god, Slade. Stop. 

As I said, the ending was WILD. So many loose ends that I need to see tied close. Does Rissa survive? Does Argo? Where does Auren land in Annwyn? Will she cross the Bridge of Temuria back to Orea to find Slade or vice versa? WHAT HAPPENED TO DROLLARD? WHERE'S MAMA RAVINGER? Real talk tho, loved this book. 

Oh, I am very disappointed in Malina for being so STUPID. I was rooting for her back in Glint. I wanted her to win over Midas, I wanted her to kick his ass and steal back her throne, but she really bit the bullet and now basically just started the faerie war like a big dumb idiot. Also, fuck Kaila. I think she's a bad bitch, yes, but how dare she for hurting my wife, Auren, like that. 

And the last thing I've got to say. Isolte...we got beef. If she doesn't die super painfully...I'm going to be very upset.