#guide or just tell all the needed context
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Hellooo! And
☆boop☆
Did you end up writing that Ivy fic? 👀 I'd love to read it and maybe you'll make me get into DC comics 🤸🤸🤸
If you didn't, do you wanna share what you were planning?
Naww bc I couldn't get the characterisation of the other character the way I wanted and it was annoying lol maybe writing isn't my destiny, I'll just stick to drawing. And I havvvve many things to draw. Reading fics is more fun. Like yours👅👅
I thought you said comics as a media isn't your thing? Which is fine ofc ✌️ If you ever want to try tho let me knowww
#also before her main ongoing comic her story is all over the place in different characters comics lol so I could either try to do a little#guide or just tell all the needed context#I like to know everything but to understand the comic maybe you don't need it alllll
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parentified angel trying (and failing) to take care of wilhelm in the same way that she's been made to help jack. hello. is this thing on.
#not maintagging this because its SO specific but im thinking about it!!#i think angel does this to some degree with every VH but she relates herself a lot to wilhelm and at that age she just doesnt know how#to handle that without Kind Of freaking out about it. and ofc it doesnt settle right with wilhelm because he “doesnt need” people#tending to him. especially not an ai (teenage girl). it feels strange and invasive.#it doesnt really work for any of the TPS VHs because. well its not supposed to. its a front thats been made specifically to cater to jacks#volatile emotional state. nisha meets it with confusion and derision and its just completely ineffective on aurelia because whatever#emotional support she craves isnt going to be fulfilled by angel its going to come from her family. and well. uhm.#timothy. hm. from what i can tell hes the youngest of the TPS VHs and probably the most likley to get something out of angels fawning but#him looking just like jack and partly having his DNA would Also freak her out. i think out of all of them she struggles to talk with him#the most. and he can pick up on the strained familiarity but he doesnt have the context for it. so now hes freaked out too.#and claptrap and angel are just Friends to me. like. they just know each other already.#also to ME angel was guiding the TPS VHs even if it doesnt make sense. this is all under the assumption that they think shes an ai during#TPS bc obviously theyd all feel differently if they knew who she actually was.
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Something that always annoys me is the idea only 1 language learning method works. Which is not true. While it may be possible that, for a particular individual, only a few out of many study methods may work well enough for That Individual to make progress and stay motivated... that doesn't mean all the other study methods won't work for anyone else out there, or that those few methods will work for every other given person.
Obviously if you've been studying a while, then you already figured out what kinds of things work for you and don't. If you're a beginner, just wading into studying?
I would suggest you simply look for study methods that: 1. Teach you new things regularly, 2. Review and practice things you've learned, 3. Include studying things you need for your particular goals (for example if your goal is to read X book then the study materials at some point should involve reading practice and some words the book contains, if your goal is to talk about Y then the study materials should include some information about pronunciation and words you'll need to be able to say).
As you can imagine, a TON of study materials will meet these requirements. And you can study a given skill in a LOT of ways.
(Reading is my focus lol so just for reading, a beginner might: do vocabulary study with lists or conversations with native speakers or watching shows and looking words up or listening to dialogues with a transcript like in a textbook or graded readers or a picture book with word labels in the target language or a video game with labelled objects in target language, all of those things as long as your vocabulary is improving or reading practice is happening would help you make progress). So to improve reading skill as a beginner: you could study with a textbook, a podcast with transcript, a classroom or tutor with words written down in target language (like TPRS), a video game, a TV show and a translate app on your phone, a friend you talk with (who either writes words down or you look up words you hear with a translate app), a friend you text with, srs flashcards like anki (provided there's text) etc. As long as there's new words, and/or you're practicing reading, the study method may work. If it works will come down to if you can stay motivated doing it regularly, and make sure you regularly learn some new things and review/practice things you've already studied.
So consider those things when you see people selling a study method as a product (especially when it's costing you money). Consider if it teaches you NEW things, and are those new things related to your goals, and how MUCH new stuff will it teach you before you finish it? Consider if it provides review or practice, or if you can use it's materials to review on your own making up your own method, or if you'll need to do separate review/practice.
So examples:
LingQ. Can it teach you many new words? Yes, thousands, since you can import any texts you want when you get done with their provided material (I have no idea how much their beginner material covers though in terms of words... I would hope 1000-3000 words but that can be researched). Is your goal reading? It's suited to reading, so you will practice and review often with it. Cost? I think it was $12 a month when I last had it, and the price may have increased. Is it worth it? Depends on a learner's needs. I found it was wasting my money, so I chose to use free tools like Pleco and Readibu apps - since those apps are suited for Chinese learners and have better translations, Pleco has better paid graded reader material if I was going to spend money, and both Pleco and Readibu let me import texts so I can learn thousands of new words just like LingQ but free. Now that I'm not a beginner, I often use Microsoft Edge to read chinese... since I can still click-translate words easily (all my web browsers have that tool free), and Edge's TTS voice is helpful for pronunciation and sounds quite good. I read webnovels online so Edge works well. But it's translations aren't as good as Pleco or Readibu, so if I still needed translations more I would use them. So... is LingQ a good study method? Its certainly a study method marketed to buy. Well... the method is suited to improving reading skill, at least. It costs money, which is a negative, but it does offer a lot. However: everything it does regarding reading can be done free with other apps or sites or web browsers on their own. So if paying money motivates you to read... sure. LingQ does have a few word tracking features a learner may find worth the money, keeping in mind the actual read-to-learn method can be done free without lingq. (Also... while LingQ is a valid option for improving reading, if the learners goal is speaking then it would be important to think of what study activities the learner will do OUTSIDE of LingQ to improve speaking... because I've seen how LingQ is marketed as "how to learn a language" but it's only focused on some skills. It has vocabulary and grammar in some sense, since you'll read a lot and encounter new words and structures. But it doesnt have speaking or writing practice at least last time I was on it. Those activities would need to be worked on, on your own).
You can do that kind of cost/benefit contemplating with any study method material you see being sold. Amother example: there's a beginner Mandarin course called Mandarin Blueprint. It teaches like 800 words. Thats all. It may be worthwhile for a beginner... who still needs to learn 800 common words. But if you already know a few hundred words, the benefit of the course is less, you'll need to find a new material to teach you more new stuff soon. And the price was like a few hundred for the course... which for me personally was too much to spend, when I had already learned 800 hanzi from a book that cost me 12 dollars and 2000 words from a free user made memrise deck. The course claimed to get a person speaking, competent, but anyone not a beginner would say speaking basically with 800 words is nowhere near the level of working in Chinese or just doing a lot of daily life stuff, or reading/listening to media. (Although for the motivated beginner if you're learning 800 words on your own like I was, its definitely close to the point of jumping to learn more words and start reading kids and teenager books, and watching easier shows if you're willing to look new words up). So to me... Mandarin Blueprint felt like overselling some basic beginner materials. (Again when I know several other things that teach beginner stuff either more in depth so HSK test prep classes, and college courses, or that teach beginner stuff to the same depth as Mandarin Blueprint but free).
Some study materials aren't going to act like they teach everything. I've seen chinese courses just for learning to speak tones better and general pronunciation - probably worthwhile if your goal is to improve speaking and a teacher could help improve the issues your having. But a learner needs to be aware for that course that they'll need to study vocabulary on their own, its JUST a pronunciation improvement course.
#rant#i saw a lot of comments on forums yesterday thinking automatic language growth alg was like snake oil#aka a scam. but it can be done for free (free lessons online) and for people who#learn well from visual context and guessing (i learn well that way) the lesson style DOES result in learning new words and grammar#so provided you can find ALG type free lessons that teach 1000+ words (ideally 3000+ words) then you will learn#enough grammar and words to then move onto native speaker content to continue studying. so all free#i have not seen yet how ALG helps students with speaking or writing yet though. so i can only say it for sure improves passive skills#specifically listening with new words and grammar. and listening translates to reading if you practice that on your own#even just with subtitles or podcast transcripts.#the issue for me is can i find alg courses that teach a thousand words in a timely manner (and free if thats my personal requirement)#i think Dreaming Spanish and Comprehensible Thai do have enough free courses to teach 1000+ words#so those ones would get you to possibly intermediate b1 level in passive listening skill#and then its up to you on if 1 that meets your goal 2 you learn well with that lesson type 3 you are motivated to do the lessons#like... duolingo itself is not completely useless... it teaches 3000 words on most courses (and maybe 1500 common words). the big issue for#me with duolingo is it takes me AGES to complete a lesson and complete a course (years). cause i cant focus on it#whereas with duolingos content... its beginner content. at best it will get Reading skill to A2 or low B1#and maybe other skills if you practice OUTSIDE duolingo with the words and grammar u learned.#so getting to A2 vocab shouldnt take me more than a year to learn (based on how i study). i can learn it in 6 months if i#just study a wordlist on paper and a grammar guide online. so since duolingo takes me 4 times LONGER to study than the other methods i use?#duolingo is a waste of my time. not worth it (and it markets itself as if it will get a learner to B2 when it wont. and it markets#as if 1 lesson a day is all you need. to make progress in 6 months in duolingo like my wordlist study...#you'd need to be doing duolingo 1-3 hours a day... which duolingo does not tell u to do. and most learners dont
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I keep thinking about how on earth they would canonize ggy bc like. at this point if they have to sacrifice Gregory screentime of just him to make something we already know actually canon, I would rather just take the screentime, but on the other hand they have to canonize it if they want to do anything at all with that plotline, and that makes me wonder if theyll stick with it as canon in the games at all or just leave it as background knowledge if u read the book 😭
#like i love ggy just as much as the nezt person and go crazy at how canon it is but not yet#but also i like gregory a lot more and ggy isnt the only reason hes my favorite#gregory was my favorite for a whole year before ggy even came out#i want him as a person to be developed more than his ggy plot when we already know its real#but gregory himself desperately needs more time focused on his character to tell us more about him#maybe give some context to some of his decisions#best case scenario honestly is Gregory has a protagonist plotline where it showcases his character and relationships with others#as the game progresses naturally with dialogue and stuff (freddy and vanessa being his guides or something)#with the focus being saving cassie#but as the game reaches its climax gregory realises for some reason or another that apparently he was ggy and did all those things#and was the mimics fave#but its established he had amneisa before security breach so he didnt remember and still doesnt#he just knows he did it and has to deal#so it doesnt completely take over everything else about his character#and then whatever happens at the end of that game has cassie saved and joining 3 star#who GOT DEVELOPMENT in this hypothetical#like idk i want ggy to be canon but i dont want it to overtake gregory#yknow what i mean#it should be background to him not the other way around#vanessa and cassie already have that big main possession plotline#pandas.txt#tbh if they replace gregorys backstory with something equally interesting I'll be ok with no game ggy#we already have a whole book to mess around with i wouldn't mind it being a little au even tho i know it isnt#its VERY canon and ill 100% be alright and happy w game ggy#but im nervous for how they would establish it in a game if at all#with how much gregory needs screentime just as a character and if he'd need to wait even longer after a ggy reveal#thoughts#gregory
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Beginners Guide to Descriptive Sentences
Hi writers.
I’m Rin T, and in this post I’m excited to share with you a detailed guide on how to craft vivid descriptions and descriptive sentences for your writing. I’ve long believed that descriptive writing is the magic that turns ordinary text into an immersive experience. When done well, every sentence acts like a brushstroke that paints a scene in the reader’s mind.
──────────────────────────── Why Descriptive Writing Matters ────────────────────────────
I have seen how powerful descriptions can engage readers and establish a strong connection with the narrative. Descriptive writing is not simply about decorating your work; it is about building an atmosphere that transports your reader to a world. your world.
When you write descriptions, remember:
You are setting the tone.
You are building a world.
You are evoking emotions.
You are inviting your readers to experience your story with all their senses.
──────────────────────────── Step-by-Step: Crafting Vivid Descriptions ────────────────────────────
Below are my personal tips and tricks to help you build detailed and captivating descriptions:
Begin With the Senses
Description does not solely depend on what the eyes can see. Consider sound, smell, taste, and touch. For instance, instead of writing “The witch’s hut was eerie,” try elaborating: “The witch’s hut exuded an eerie aura. The creaking timber and distant echoes of whispering winds mingled with the pungent aroma of burnt sage and mysterious herbs.” In this way, you help the reader not only see the scene but also feel it.
Choose Precise and Evocative Language
Precision in language is vital. Replace generic adjectives with specific details to boost clarity and imagery. Rather than “The forest was dark,” consider: “The forest was a labyrinth of shadowed boughs and muted undergrowth, where the light barely touched the spindly branches, and every step unveiled whispers of ancient spells.” Specific details create tangible images that stay with readers.
Show, Don’t Just Tell
A common mistake is to “tell” the reader how to feel, rather than “showing” it through context and detail. Instead of writing “It was a spooky night,” immerse your reader: “Under a pallid crescent moon, the night unfurled like a canvas of foreboding whispers; broken branches and rustling leaves narrated the secrets of a long-forgotten curse.” By showing the elements, you invite the reader to experience the fear and mystery firsthand. (You don't need to be as dramatic as my examples, but this is simply for inspiration)
Use Figurative Language Thoughtfully
Metaphors, similes, and other figures of speech lend an artistic flair to your descriptions. When writing about a scene in a magical world, you might say: “Her eyes shone like twin beacons of moonlit silver, cutting through the gloom as if to part the veil of night itself.” Such comparisons evoke emotions and deepen the reader’s connection with the scene. However, be cautious not to overdo it; a little figurative language can go a long way.
Strike a Balance Between Details and Pacing
While elaborate descriptions are alluring, too many details can weigh down your narrative. Consider introducing the broader scene first and then focusing on key elements that define the mood. For instance, start with an overview: “The village lay nestled between ancient stone arches and mist-covered hills.” Then, zoom into details: “A solitary, ivy-clad tower sent spiraling tendrils of mist into the twilight, as if guarding secrets of a long-lost incantation.” This technique creates a rhythm, drawing readers in gradually.
──────────────────────────── Practical Exercises to Enhance Your Descriptive Writing ────────────────────────────
To help you practice these techniques, try the following exercises:
Sensory Detail Drill: Select a familiar scene from your fantasy world (for example, a witch’s secluded garden). Write a short paragraph focusing on each of the five senses. What do you taste as you bite into a magical fruit? What sounds resonate in the quiet of the enchanted night? This drill helps you to avoid flat descriptions and encourages you to integrate sensory experiences.
Revision and Refinement: Take a simple sentence like “The night was cold,” and transform it using the advice above. Rework it into something like, “The night was a canvas of shimmering frost and darkness, where every breath of the wind carried a hint of winter’s sorrow.” Compare the two, and notice how minor adjustments can dramatically heighten the mood.
Peer Review Sessions: Sharing your work can offer invaluable insights. Exchange your descriptions with fellow writers and ask for focused feedback, Does the description evoke the intended emotion? Does it deliver a clear image? Use these sessions as opportunities to improve and refine your craft.
──────────────────────────── Common Pitfalls and How to Avoid Them ────────────────────────────
Through my years of writing, I've learned that even the most passionate writers can stumble. Here are some pitfalls to watch out for:
Overloading With Adjectives: While it’s tempting to create elaborate descriptions, too many adjectives and adverbs can distract rather than enhance. Aim for clarity and purpose in every word. Instead of “a very dark, spooky, frightening forest filled with creepy sounds,” try “a forest shrouded in ominous silence, where every rustle hinted at unseen mysteries.”
Falling Into Clichés: Familiar images can sometimes render your work predictable. Try to avoid worn phrases. Instead of “as dark as night,” imagine “as impenetrable as the void that separates worlds.” Unique expressions capture attention and create lasting impressions.
Neglecting the Flow: Descriptions are vital, but the narrative must continue to drive forward. Check that your detailed passages serve to enhance the storyline rather than bog it down. Ask yourself: Does this description bring the reader closer to the action, or does it detract from the momentum of the narrative?
──────────────────────────── Advanced Techniques for the Aspiring Writer ────────────────────────────
Once you’re comfortable with the basics, consider these advanced methods to elevate your descriptions into artful prose:
Integrate Descriptions Seamlessly: Instead of isolating your descriptions, weave them into dialogue and action. For example, as a witch brews her potion, you might describe the bubbling cauldron and swirling mists as part of her incantation, not just as a standalone scene. “As she whispered the ancient words, the cauldron responded, its surface rippling like a dark mirror reflecting centuries of secrets.”
Reflect Character Perspectives: Let your characters’ emotions color the scene. If a character fears a looming threat, their perception will add a layer of tension to the environment. “I entered the dim corridor with trepidation, my heart pounding as the flickering torchlight revealed spectral figures dancing along the walls.” This technique makes the description both situational and personal.
Use Rhythm: The cadence of your sentences can mirror the pace of your narrative. In high-tension moments, short, abrupt sentences heighten the urgency. Conversely, in serene scenes, longer, flowing sentences can create a tranquil atmosphere. Experiment with sentence structure until you find a balance that suits both your style and the mood you wish to convey.
──────────────────────────── Final Thoughts and Encouragement ─────────────────────���──────
your narrative is your unique creation. you too will find your distinctive voice. I encourage you to keep experimenting with different techniques until your descriptions feel both natural and mesmerizing. Write freely, revise diligently, and most importantly, let your creative spirit shine through every line.
Thank you for joining me. I hope these tips can help you.
#on writing#creative writing#writing#writing tips#writers block#how to write#thewriteadviceforwriters#writeblr#writers and poets#writers on tumblr#novel writing#fiction writing#romance writing#writing advice#writing blog#writing characters#writing community#writing help#writing ideas#writing inspiration#writing guide#writing prompts#writing a book#writing resources#writing reference#writing tips and tricks#writers#writing tools#writing life#writing software
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Simon, while having a solid amount of sexual experience, has just never really done the whole relationship thing. He knows what he's like at work, he knows what he's like with friends, he knows what he's like in bed, but Boyfriend Simon? No clue who that guy is.
So when he falls hard enough for you to actually be convinced to give it a try, he just assumes he'll wear the pants in the relationship. He always wears the pants, so why would it be any different in this context? Not like a Whole Thing, like he's not picturing a lifestyle in which he's the big dominant man and you're submissive, obedient ... it's more like he just pictures himself taking care of things.
You picture it differently. And he is shocked by how much he loves your take on things.
"Simon, go wash your face and I'll put some moisturizer on you, you're getting a little dry." "We're having what you want for dinner tonight and I don't want to hear another word about it." "Just sit down and rest for a minute, I can handle it."
There are all these little things that you say and do -- little ways that show that you care, and that you think about him -- that all add up to something much bigger. It all makes him realize that maybe Boyfriend Simon is someone who can rest. Perhaps he doesn't need to be constantly, relentlessly in charge and on alert. Maybe this way, he can be cared for.
Of course, the feeling translates to the bedroom too. With his previous hookups, he'd always taken the lead. Strong hands putting his partner where he wanted them to go. Never too rough, never too demanding, but focused on his own pleasure, just like he always assumed the other person was focused on theirs.
Not on your watch.
He felt like he was being torn in two the first time you knelt before him and put your hands on his belt buckle, intention clear. It was like he was being split between the Simon he knew better, the one who might have greedily pulled down his jeans, tipped open your lips with a thumb on your chin and slid deep inside your hot mouth until tears rolled down your cheeks, and the Simon you'd somehow pulled out of him. The one who was too in love to imagine using you like that.
He told you as much that night. He stilled your hand over his belt with his own, his voice sounding strangled as he murmured, "Don't have to do that, love."
"Of course I don't have to," you'd told him. "I want to."
And you did. You unbuckled his belt, unbuttoned his jeans then put your soft, warm hands on his hips, just under his shirt, and pushed his pants down, along with his boxers. You took his cock in your hand first, using slow, languid strokes, then gazed up at him.
“Is this ok?”
He began realizing, when you took him into your mouth only after he said yes, that this wasn’t him using you. It was clear in the little muffled whimpers you made as you pulled him close enough for his tip to hit the back of your throat and in the way your free hand gripped his thigh, like you were the one who needed grounding — you were enjoying this too. This was just another way for you to care for him.
Now, after days and weeks and months have passed of breaking down and rebuilding, learning and growing with you into something he never knew he could be, he trusts you. He values your judgment, he believes you what you tell him. If you think he needs to rest, he will. If you lead him, he'll follow.
Whatever you want, whatever you need, whether you let it be known with words or glances or your hands on him, guiding him, steady and sure ... now, Simon listens.
#simon riley#call of duty simon riley#simon ghost riley#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#cod ghost#call of duty ghost#ghost x you#ghost x reader
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nanami's not about to fight with u... he's just gonna show u who you truly belong to. read part 1 for context
"i'm not fighting with you, just get on your knees."
"ken, we have a houseful of guests-
he's shaking his head, tugging his zipper in a fateful swoop. you don't lie and say you weren't buzzing with the idea of what he'd do next, but it felt so wrong. now was not the time to be getting him off.
"i won't repeat myself." then his pants are down and he's easing his already-flushed cock from its confines. he's rubbing himself to his full potential right in front of you, so comfortable with you standing in front of him, wide-eyed and nervous.
luckily your kitchen is closed off from the rest of the house, but it's not completely closed. someone could easily pop their head into the arched entryway and see everything you're seeing. deep down you know kento wouldn't let that happen. he has the awareness of an anxious cat, so you trust him enough to get on your knees, crawling to close the distance between you two.
"i'm doing this because domination tends to make you mild-mannered," he explains briefly, voice tinged with a hint of arousal. "and that's what I need from you right now. do you understand?"
"mhm." you reply, looking up at him with silent doe-eyes. from this angle at his feet, he looks so much bigger. daunting and familiar. so beautiful... and all yours.
"relax your throat." he demands just before taking a handful of your hair and guiding you down the length of him. he's not easy to take in the slightest - your jaw burns, eyes screwed shut as you try to swallow back a gag.
then, a thunderous bout of laughter erupts from the other room and you fold -- gagging and choking all over his pretty cock.
he yanks you backward, face screwed up in distaste. "what did I just tell you?"
"'m sorry." you whine as he smushes your lips with his tip.
"if satoru walks in here and sees you like this, i will be extremely upset."
"'m sorry." you repeat, genuinely sorry and just wanting him inside of you again. he's barely gracing your lips, but every atom in your body is screaming for him. if you thought satoru was charming five minutes ago, you didn't even know who he was now. all you want is your husband.
"him and his righteous savior complex.. makes me sick." he mutters, mostly to himself. he has two big hands on either side of your head, squeezing like only he can. it's been too long together, he knows you're not a china doll.
so, he fucks your limp throat like he hates you, eye twitching as he watches your face go more flushed with each mean thrust he's delivering. you've never taken him like this, feeling the drippy tip of his cock at the base of your throat, giving you goosebumps all around his touch. you've never felt closer to him, yet so pained by every one of his movements.
it's like your entire mind goes limp. etched with scrawling versions of his name only. he's you can think about, all you can taste...
only when he's finally done and marked your stomach with his seed, does he help you up with a strong hand, just holding you close for a second until yours stops shaking.
he doesn't say a word, just watching your eyes as they stare back at him expressionless but teary and bloodshot nonetheless. he leans forward and kisses your forehead.
"sorry. you know i'll always love you."
you nod, because... yeah. same. that makes him smile.
and he guides you back to your party holding your hand, watching out for you as you take the seat next to satoru back. it's like he doesn't even notice your presence, he's far too preoccupied teasing utahime about some nameless story from the past.
once the party has concluded and kento is seeing them all out, does satoru stop and say something.
"poor, little nanami..." satoru stops just before he reaches the first step past the front door. ken regards him with a nod, leaning against the doorframe. "this is what happens when the lamb chooses a wolf."
"do i even want you to explain?"
satoru shrugs him off, throwing up in hand as a curt goodbye as he turns around. "she's too nice. it's sad to know you yelled at her... she was all teary-eyed and mellow for the rest of the night."
kento turns around, chuckling to himself as he finally shuts the front door. reveling in the quiet comfort of his home he thinks:
ha. did much more than make her cry...
#fr if ken and gojo were fighting over u who u pickin#idk i'm always choosing ken#unless geto's an option#also hello to the 700 of u on here? :o#.the wife guy!! <3#.nanami <3#jjk x reader#jjk fanfic#jjk smut#nanami x reader#nanami smut#nanami kento x reader#nanami x you
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DRAMIONE FIC RECS + WHY YOU SHOULD READ THEM — 100k+ words edition

hogwarts: a home by coralcollective — reimagined horcrux hunt. draco is so down bad for hermione and the smut is crazyyy. theo/hermione friendship. pansy is the breakout character and you'll love her. there's nsfw art and inappropriate use of the malfoy signet ring. please check the tags! (it says incomplete on ao3, but it's only missing epilogues so don't be afraid of starting it)
word count: 372,978
chapters: 67/70
the commoner's guide to bedding a royal by olivieblake — god, this fic!!!! it's a modern royal au and the ensemble of characters make this whole world feel so alive. it's inspired by will/kate and harry/meghan and it's sooo cute. theo and daphne were the breakout characters and i love them dearly. if you're looking for a lighthearted romcom-esque, occasionally angsty (because duh!) fic, this is it!!! i probably read this in two days which is insane considering the word count, but that should just tell you how lovely this whole fic was. there's a second part to this if you're itching for more afterwards (and it's just as good!)
word count: 503,570
chapters: 45/45
draco malfoy and the mortifying ordeal of being in love by isthisselfcare — honestly if you haven't read this yet..... this is god tier. a CLASSIC. this should be taught in the schools. hermione's a magical researcher / healer and draco's one of the best aurors out there. he's assigned to protect hermione because she's in the midst of a big discovery. hermione's not happy about it and draco isn't either. slow burn!! idiots in LOVE!! forced proximity!!!!! EMBEDDED ART!!! honestly this is the fic that made me want to learn how to bind which is so serious and if you haven't read this yet you need to.
word count: 199,548
chapters: 36/36
the disappearances of draco malfoy by speechwriter — this is my new canon. it's a deathly hallows rewrite where draco accepts dumbledore's offer to fake his death and go into hiding with the order. enemies to friends to lovers. i honestly can't even remember what happened in canon because this is IT for me.
word count: 289,780
chapters: 33/33
this world or any other series by olivieblake — includes clean (book one) and marked (book two). anything by olivieblake should be a must-read, i swear to god. this one starts as a year 6 slow burn. draco and hermione are assigned partners for potions and it all snowballs from there. olivie writes so beautifully and her characterizations for hermione / draco are so good. slight warning for marked: this destroyed me and i pretend it doesn't exist, but it's still a must-read.
word count: 118,892 & 178,268
chapters: 31/31 & 39/39
rights and wrongs series by lovesbitca8 — you want fluffy dramione? read the first two parts of the rights and wrongs series. you want dark and heavy dramione? read the auction, an alternate universe of the fluffy dramione, where voldemort wins and they all get auctioned off to death eaters. please check the tags for the voldy wins au! all three were chef's kiss and coming from someone who isn't a fan of dark aus, reading the first two helped me get through the auction because you know where draco's coming from / what's in his head. you can just read the auction without reading the first two parts unless you like catching parallels and having more depth / context (which i very much love).
word count: 174,911 & 160,297 & 325,876
chapters: 36/36 & 24/24 & 41/41
#we can also call this my dramione reading log honestly#dramione#draco x hermione#dramione fic recs#draco malfoy#hermione granger#draco malfoy x hermione granger#dramione recs#talk to me about dramione because i have more recs and i will take recs i never tire of reading about them
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Let's Talk About Noah Schnapp
In light of everything that's happened in the last few days—namely Netflix releasing its first teaser for Stranger Things Season 5—many are returning to Stranger Things spaces online here and elsewhere for the first time in months. Maybe years. So, it's time to have this conversation again, because many people weren't here when some of us were having this conversation in the lull between content; and we're due for an update.
Buckle up—this is going to be long. I intend for this to be a mega post on the whole situation in so far as I can cover it, with receipts and screenshots.
The Conversation Around Noah
Put bluntly—the vitriol around Noah Schnapp has become dangerously insane. It's been that way for 2 years, but the renewed spotlight on Stranger Things, especially as Noah is set to take center stage in a Will Byers-centric season, has revived some of the worst elements of the conversation.
"What do you mean?", you may be asking. Well, I think it might just be better to show you:
This is just a sampling. If I showed you every tweet — every post — every video I've seen with this rhetoric, I'd need another medium to do it. A tumblr blog alone couldn't contain it all. But I take it you see my point now.
How Did Things Get This Way?
There are people on this app and on #that app who will say this behavior/treatment is warranted. They'll tell you that Noah is a "genocide supporter." That he "cheered for the deaths of Palestinian babies." That he "celebrated as people were being murdered." But none of this is true.
As a reminder, this was what Noah actually said—his very first comments on the matter—right after the Hamas attack that happened on October 7, 2023:

Important to note:
"...we will hope and pray for safety, justice, liberation, and self determination in Palestine."
and
"...we will say a Jewish prayer for peace for all Israelis and Palestinians."
That is the literal antithesis of support for a genocide or the wholesale slaughter of anyone.
The very next thing to happen was the infamous "sticker video" about which the most lies have been told, so let's debunk them one by one:
He did not make the stickers.
He did not wear the stickers.
He did not hand out the stickers.
He did not hold up the stickers.
He did not even touch the stickers.
He did not post the video on any social anywhere.


I've posted a pair of screenshots here that give you the gist in lieu of the video itself, but you can Google the video and watch the entire thing to see that I'm telling the truth.
What actually happened was that Noah was taken to a restaurant by a pair of influencers who were his guides while on a school-sponsored trip to Israel. Both were significantly older than him, were responsible for the video in question, were the only ones in it (aside from the waitress) to actually touch the stickers in question... and yet? Noah bore the brunt of the hate that ensued. When the backlash came, they abandoned him and left him to the wolves. (And perhaps because of that, he no longer associates with either one of them, nor follows any related social media accounts—all of which he was required to follow in the first place as terms of going on the trip through his school.)
Noah had just come out of the closet earlier that year and was 18 years-old. He would only turn 19 years-old in the ensuing weeks.
He has addressed these events several times. Most famous was the TikTok that he made explaining his actual position (that he doesn't want anyone, Palestinian or Israeli, to die). Less famous were remarks he made to fans on Snapchat:

I'll post his remarks here for those who can't read the text:
Hey guys! I appreciate you reaching out. To give you context, I did not post this language or sticker. I was at breakfast with friends, it happened to be an Israeli cafe, and a girl was handing out stickers. Someone photographed me and posted and tagged me. As you guys know better than most people, social media can be used however people want to use it. I understand the weight of the situation and take it very seriously. I have friends of friends who are currently being held hostage in Gaza right now. My friends kids were killed in the massacre at the Israeli music festival. Standing up against this terrorism is important to me and why I made my statement after the attack. As one of the only few Jewish people with a platform, I absolutely think it's important to share my message about hatred for Jews around the world right now. However, everyone online is obviously twisting everything and saying I support genocide and am Islamophobic which is obviously entirely false and never have I stated either of those things. Seeing what is happening to the innocent people in Palestine pains me so much and I wish it would stop. I fully support everyone in Palestine as I said in my post on Instagram. One of my best friends in college is Palestinian and we talk about this issue allllll the time and agree on most things. I think people on social media are just animalistic right now so it's hard to even chime in because they just rip me apart so now I'm staying out of it.
I'll let that stand on it's own. I think it provides the context behind his remarks, the situation with the video/stickers, and his actual views versus how social media portrays his views. It also explains why he hasn't said anything else in almost 2 years.
The key takeaway: He was speaking out against antisemitism and the attack on Jewish people on October 7 and he supports an end to what is happening in Gaza and fully supports Palestinians. He literally says it.
And this support, by the way, has been corroborated by his own actions and the word of mouth from Palestinian organizations he has contributed to:




What Has Happened Since?
It would be easier to list the things that haven't happened; but I'll try anyways:
Noah has been called antisemitic slurs; gay slurs and targeted with gay stereotypes; been compared to antisemitic caricatures; he's been threatened with death and had posts go viral fantasizing about his brutal murder; his family has been threatened; he's been threatened with rape and sexual abuse; there are massive accounts on Twitter that doxxed his location while he was filming Season 5—particularly targeting him when he was alone; he's been hacked, had personal pictures leaked; he's had lies spread about his treatment of his cast mates (all of whom have spoken out and said that they've loved him at some point since, making these claims unequivocally false.
Here are a few examples:







Again, I can only post a sample. I hope that sample is enough to get the message across.
It's hard to overstate how cataclysmic this has been. Obviously, he's recovered and healed a lot since the initial incident; but the damage done needs to be acknowledged. These attacks drove him into a dark place by his own admission. He talked about needing therapy on his (now deleted) private spam TikTok account. And they are starting up yet again.
And Then There's the Fandom
The Stranger Things fandom in the wake of all this has been an irritating place to be. Not just because of the above behavior but because of the blanket hypocrisy.
The shipping sub-fandoms in particular have been rank with antisemitism and homophobia—even the Byler fandom, which is predominantly queer. People have:
A) Taken pre-Stranger Things photos—like his baby pictures or pictures with his family—to use as part of their content, their profile pictures, their banners, their fan art, their fan edits, etc.—violating his and his family's privacy for "Will" all while calling him "ugly," a "fag," and lobbing the above-listed threats at him. B) Tried to recast him with a fan cast. These fan casts are almost never Jewish actors, you'll notice. In fact, there's someone on this very app that recast Will Byers as himself. This is gross and absurd. Will Byers is intrinsically tied to Noah Schnapp. Tied to his identities as a Jewish person and a gay man. Tied to his experiences being a character he helped bring to life during his formative years. C) Persist in stanning or support his cast mates despite the fact that they continue to associate with him. This, in particular, is gross hypocrisy. If you're going to be mad at Noah Schnapp for being in a restaurant around stickers you object to—guilt by proximity/association, in other words—those SAME standards should apply to his cast mates, who continue to hang out with him outside of work, state that they love him, and post him on their social medias. I have a whole post about that here.
Instead, the cast is continually afforded blanket immunity while he is singularly targeted for continued abuse and harassment.
It should give the fandom some pause that openly pro-Palestine actors like Maya Hawke not only continue to hang out with him; but in her Instagram story, even stated that she misses it (check the link above for a screenshot of said story). She wouldn't do that if she thought he somehow supported mass-murder; and she knows him way better than any one reading this blog. That goes for the rest of them, too.
They know him better than you. They know his moral compass and what he believes. And they haven't abandoned him and obviously aren't going to. So, are you going to stick to your guns and apply your anger evenly; or maybe consider that you don't have the full picture?
So, Why Care?
I get this in my Asks so often. "Why do you care?" "He's a celebrity." "He don't know you." "He's not your pookie."
I know. It's not about that.
Yes, full disclosure, I am obviously a fan of Noah's. Have been since the show started. And no it's not because I'm gay and he's gay or because he plays my favorite character in Stranger Things.
Like many of his fans, I've spent the last decade seeing his lives on Instagram and TikTok, seeing his fan interactions, watching his vlogs and videos, and I've come to respect him as a human being quite apart from Will Byers or his role as an actor. Fundamentally, I really believe he is a kind and caring human being. The word of mouth from everyone who knows or has met him bares this out—and, yes, he's even been kind to me in the few conversations we've had.

This is only one example from Instagram during The First Shadow premiere this year; but I think it encapsulates what I like about Noah most. He's kind. He goes out of his way to be kind. He does things he doesn't have to do, contractually or just in general, for the sake of being kind. He always has been.
He's also stood up for a plethora of causes. Black Lives Matters, trans rights, the rights of women. He's known to be his cast mates' biggest supporter—and they'll tell you as much, too.

But quite apart from my personal feelings about him and more importantly: this is wrong.
Antisemitism is wrong. Homophobia is wrong. Both kill. Still, to this day. As I am sitting in my kitchen writing this, the news just broke that an Indigenous gay man and a celebrity was shot dead in front of his husband—after having his home burned down and dogs burned alive—in the United States. Yesterday, news broke that a gathering of peaceful Jewish protesters (which included children and the elderly) demanding the release of hostages still held by Hamas was firebombed in Colorado. Luckily, they all survived, but six people were injured in that attack.
Violence and bigotry are ascendent everywhere right now. Minority communities are being targeted. Normalizing the behavior I've described and shown above kills marginalized people. Regardless of your feeling about Noah as a person or celebrity, normalizing the violent and bigoted remarks, tweets, and behavior towards him harms Jewish and LGBTQIA+ people—all of us.
And just as an example of that, I give you the treatment Finn Wolfhard is now receiving just for the "crime" of shaving his head and being deemed no longer conventionally attractive by the fandom:

Yes, the general audience found out about Finn's Jewish heritage and now he's a target, too.
And this fandom is at fault for it.
You cannot normalize bigotry towards one person and expect it to stay contained to that one person. It will always harm everyone in that community. Finn Wolfhard—or any other actor/actress—being your favorite is not going to spare him from the consequences of a discourse you started.
ALL antisemitism and ALL homophobia needs to be called out. The people who insist it's okay that they do that for ANY reason—regardless of if they themselves are LGBTQIA+ or not—need to be ejected from the fandom and never let back in.
Noah Schnapp is a human being. He does not deserve this treatment. No one does. No one is saying you have to like him or even care about him. But you SHOULD care that this is how he's being treated and the impact it is having on others. The impact on Jewish people. The impact on queer people. Standing up and saying that does not mean you support genocide or murder or bigotry of any kind. Quite the opposite, in fact.
I am a person with left-leaning values. I'm tired of those values being spat on and dragged through the mud by people who think THIS is activism or is in any way helping a cause. It's not. All it is doing is perpetuating harm on a real person and real communities—queer and Jewish alike. And it needs to stop.
Related Blogs:
I've compiled some related blogs that expand on other elements of the situation that I've mentioned above in greater detail. This post was already long enough. I'll be updating this as more content comes out.
Examples of Noah’s Support for Gaza and Palestine (by @nymphus-fan-account)
The Evolution of a Lie
No, the Stranger Things Cast Does Not Hate Noah Schnapp
Lyric Vault’s Obsession with Noah Schnapp
#noah schnapp#ns#byler#antisemitism#homophobia#leftist antisemitism#leftist homophobia#twitter antisemitism#twitter homophobia#antibullying#stranger things#stranger things 5#st cast#anti discrimination#lgbtqia#finn wolfhard#stranger things cast#jumblr#jewish tumblr
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cockwarming adult!lottie because she might have gotten a little jealous... 😋 takes place when lottie still has the wellness center, tfem lottie. warning for legal age gap (reader is in 20s) and some possessive behavior / language!


this is torture. she's torturing you.
generally speaking, lottie wouldn't call herself a jealous person. you're hers as much as she is yours, and you've never given her any reason to think otherwise. but nonetheless, those thoughts and their corresponding emotions fester when she'd gone to pick you up from your campus earlier and seen you talking to someone. but it wasn't that, no, you chatted with your peers on the regular; what bothered her was just how close the other person was. their hand on your arm, lips turned up in some half-smirk-half-smile. you either hadn't caught on to what was them obviously flirting or— she doesn't want to entertain the possibility of an or.
when you climb into the passenger seat, dumping your bag and other belongings into the back, you can immediately tell that there's something off. lottie's shoulders are tense, and the leather on the steering wheel is creaking under her grip, but when you question her, she waves it off and gives the simple excuse of having a long day.
obviously, it was more than that, because here you are now. straddling her, face sitting in the crook of her neck, and her cock buried to the fucking hilt inside of you while she fills out paperwork. you've been instructed to remain still, with the lingering threat of being left untouched if you don't. you're fairly certain it's because of something that happened, something you might've done, but she won't give you any answers.
"l–lot, is—" you interrupt yourself with a hitch of your breath when her hips twitch up, a silent warning to be quiet. she needs to focus, doesn't she? your soft whimpers aren't helping any, but there's only so much she can do about that. not that she's actually working, she just has a point to prove.
after another what feels like a lifetime, (realistically, four or five minutes), you finally get some context into where her bad mood is coming from. "who was it that you were speaking with, when i came and picked you up?" it takes a moment or two, not only for the question to register but for you to connect the dots on what exactly she's talking about, but it's clearly not fast enough, because at your lack of response, lottie's fingers curl around your jaw and maneuver you away from the comfort of her skin, nails biting in subtle yet demanding way.
there's a sharpness in her eyes you see only in rare instances, the pen she was previously wielding discarded in favor of her palm skimming up and under the hem of your shirt. "i asked you a question, darling, and i expect an answer. who was it?"
you rummage around in your brain, stammering before getting your words in order. "a new transfer student, s–she—" you shiver, forced to take pause when her touch travels along your ribs. "she needed directions, so i was helping her o–on where her next class was."
lottie hums, pretending to consider what you'd said. it hardly matters, she has plans for you either way, though it does serve to soothe her nerves over just a little. you wait longer, expecting at least something in return, but instead, all of a sudden her hands are anchoring under your thighs and you're being lifted up; and then promptly discarded on the desk. she remains inside of your cunt, ensuring you're never completely seperated. the paperwork she was supposedly filling out will be ruined, if not now then soon, but they can always be reprinted.
"you're mine, sweetheart. you know that, don't you?" she guides you to lay back fully on the desk, one of your legs sitting lazily on her hip while the other remains held up by her hand. your lips part with the intention of saying something, maybe asking if she was uncomfortable with what she saw or thought she saw, or giving her a 'yes, i know', but all words fly out of the window when she's pulling back and then thrusting forward again, the muffled clap of your thighs against her own through the loose fabric of her gown a delicious sound.
you've never seen her jealous. really, you didn't know she got jealous, but you'd been lying if you said you didn't find it at least a tiny bit thrilling. lottie is known for her impeccable composure, and watching that slip from her grasp so she can ruin you on expensive furniture she frequently utilizes sends your mind reeling.
she's rougher than usual, but not unkind. by the time she pulls out, panting and spent, you're left practically boneless, eyes glossed over and head empty. when she hums again, it's smug, amused as her gaze follows both her cum and yours dripping out of you and onto the floor. your entire body jerks at the feel of her fingers prodding at your entrance before pushing inside, two, three times before they're gone again.
"can't have that going to waste, can we?"
#a little gift before the release of episode 5#still haven't recovered from ep 4... don't talk to me#lottie matthews#lottie matthews x reader#lottie matthews x you#lottie matthews smut#yellowjackets#yellowjackets x reader#yellowjackets x you#yellowjackets smut#simone kessell#† antlersaint#† my works
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Quick Study



Quinn Hughes x fem!reader
WARNING: SMUT! minors DNI. 18+. unprotected sex, fingering, oral fem!recieving, oral m!receiving, p in v, smut with the smallest sliver of plot. praise kink if you squint sideways and upside down.
summary: quinn loves to help you experience new things
notes: so…i don’t know what happened i think i blacked out tbh. this is kinda on theme with the request but also kinda not?? more so inexperienced!reader than in innocent!reader. idk my fingers had a mind of their own okay? enjoy 🫶🏼
request: I read a post that headcanons Quinn getting off on teaching you things and how to do things well, and that has just convinced me he has a thing for innocence… feel like that could be a great premise for smut
[4.4k]
Quinn has always been praised for his patience and willingness to teach those around him. It’s likely what landed him his new captain residency, but he likes teaching. He always said if he didn’t make it in the league he’d like to be a teacher and a coach, spreading his knowledge of history and hockey to the next generation.
What he didn’t realize until he met you, though, was how much he really enjoyed teaching.
He loved explaining the game to you, seeing your eagerness to pay attention and learn for him. Watching you glance at the cheat sheet he made you on your phone during games, making sure you’re able to keep up with the various penalties called, has him puffing out his chest a bit.
He loved explaining to you the most recent book he was reading, telling you all about the time period and the historical context of whatever story piqued his interest that week. He’d notice the empty space on the bookshelf after he finishes the book, glancing over to your side of the bed to discover the book with your bookmark tucked neatly between its pages, heart swelling when you’d bring it up over dinner, wanting to learn about his interests.
What he loved the most, though, was figuring out everything he could teach you.
He knew when the two of you first met that you were fairly inexperienced, not having ever really dated much before, but once he realized how inexperienced you really were? His mind went wild with the possibilities.
There was a certain pride he felt in being the person to guide you through all of these new experiences, never rushing you, always making sure you were one hundred percent comfortable before he tried anything new. He encouraged you to ask as many questions as you needed, telling you there’s never any reason to feel embarrassed around him.
He’d note the way you’d sit there and take in every word as he explained the different scenarios and sensations certain actions could elicit from your body, eyes wide and hungry. The second he would open the conversation for any questions or clarifications he could see the nervousness creep in, almost retracting into yourself out of embarrassment.
“I just…I don’t know exactly what you mean. You can…you know…feel that just from your mouth?” you’d ask him, voice barely above a whisper and eyes darting all over the room.
“Oh, darling, I can’t wait for you to experience the amount of things I can make you feel with my mouth,” he would nearly groan out, both angered and thankful that no other guy you’ve ever been with allowed you to experience all that the body has to offer.
Your cheeks would instantly heat, but not out of embarrassment. Quinn could see the gears turning in your head, the slight adjustment of your thighs coming closer together hinting to him how much you’re enjoying the picture painted in your head.
The day you told Quinn you had never experienced an orgasm, though? He was nearly seeing red.
“What do you mean you’ve never ‘gotten there’” he repeated your own words, not realizing the harsh tone of his voice until you looked away from him, watching your face contort into an expression of guilt.
“I- I don’t know. I mean, the couple of times I’ve actually…you know…went there with a guy, it never really happened. I guess I was doing something wrong, I don’t know,” you spoke softly, shrugging meekly.
Quinn took a deep breath, calming himself the way he would on the ice, before scooting closer to you and grabbing your hands. “You could never do anything wrong, you hear me? The fact that the fools you were with before were too sorry to make sure you were taken care of, and apparently didn’t know what the hell foreplay was, is not your fault.”
Nodding slowly, you sucked your bottom lip into your mouth and chewed on it lightly. “I think…I want you to show me,” you said so quietly Quinn thought he imagined it.
“Say that again?” he needed you to clarify, wanting to make sure he’s not just hearing what his dick wants to hear.
You inhale, preparing yourself to put on your brave face and finally find the courage to tell a guy what you want. “I want you to show me. Teach me what it’s like. I want to experience it with you.”
And damn. If that didn’t get Quinn’s dick rock fucking hard. The idea of showing you everything you’ve been missing, everything he knows he can make you feel? He could almost come right here on the couch, never even having to touch your skin.
Quinn didn’t say a word, simply grabbing your hand and prompting you to stand, leading you to the bedroom that was practically shared at this point, considering how often you stayed at his apartment.
He sat you down on the edge of the bed, standing in front of you and looking down at your big, round eyes. He had to remind himself this was about you, and not to get too ahead of himself.
Bringing a hand up to caress your face, brushing away a small strand of hair, he rests his hand on your jaw, thumb brushing over your soft, pink lips. Using the slightest bit of pressure, he wedges his thumb in-between them, causing them to part just enough for him to slip it into your warm and inviting mouth.
He feels your tongue swirl around the tip of his finger, never once breaking eye contact with him. He closes his eyes, the image in front of him overloading his brain. The second you start to suckle on the rough pad of his digit, he jerks his hand back, surprising you.
“Sorry, did I do something wro-“
“No, never,” he interrupts you, voice low and gravely. “But this is about you and I can’t let myself get carried away.”
Opening his eyes, he sees the flush come back to your cheeks, watching the outline of your tongue rolling around in your cheek. “I want to learn,” you look at him with pleading eyes.
“I know, baby, we’re gonna get there, promise,” he assures you, catching your chin between his thumb and index finger.
You shake your head back and forth, “No, I want to learn how to please you.”
Quinn can feel every ounce of blood in his body make its way straight to his already near painful cock. The innocence and eagerness on your face making his knees buckle.
“I’ve never…given a…a blowjob before,” you stuttered, your bashfulness from earlier coming back. “I never felt like I’d do a good job, and I didn’t want to disappoint anyone and scare them away, so I always said no. But I want you to teach me. Please?” you pleaded, using your eyes to convey your willingness.
If there was ever a world record for how fast a man can come without even being touched, Quinn would say he’s a pretty close contender right now.
He clears his throat, trying to choke down the groan that nearly came out. “I- uh. Are you sure?” is all he’s able to sigh out, feeling like an idiot because he can’t even form words.
You nod your head silently, not knowing if you could find the courage to ask again.
“Fuck, baby,” Quinn shudders, swallowing thickly, bringing a hand down to readjust himself in his sweats.
Figuring you need to show some sort of initiative, you bring your hand up to replace his, cupping him over the thin material.
Quinn’s entire body jerks forward at the feeling of your small hand covering him, resting his hands on your shoulders for support.
Your breath catches, not expecting to receive such a reaction from him, but it only encourages you to keep going, squeezing just enough to apply a slight pressure to his length.
Quinn grunts, shuddering at the sensation. “Fuck, Y/N.”
The sound of his voice, a slight whine but still deep and powerful, shoots a bolt of arousal straight between your legs. You start stroking his still clothed shaft, enjoying teasing him.
“Show me what to do, Q,” you whisper seductively, his actions only growing your confidence in your actions.
With his eyes squeezed shut in pleasure, he wastes no time in moving your hand and ripping the sweatpants down so roughly his dick literally springs free. He sighs at the lack of constriction, creating a sweet friction with his own hand.
Seeing him bare for the first time, you feel the extra saliva form in your mouth, wanting nothing more than to wrap your lips around him and find out how his skin tastes.
Too lost in the beauty of the man in front of you, you don’t realize he’s gazing down at you, watching how in awe you are of him.
“Babygirl, you can’t look at me like that and expect me to last longer than three seconds once you start touching me,” he snaps you out of your daze, drawing your eyes to his face.
You blush, focusing on the bedroom floor to hide your eyes from him.
Bringing his hand back up to your face, he forces you to look up at him, the intensity of the moment making you squirm.
“Touch me,” he commands, rubbing his thumb back and forth on your chin.
Following his instructions, you grasp him in your hand again, moving your hand gently across the textured skin.
You pump slowly, waiting for Quinn to tell you your next move.
“Shit, faster,” is all he whimpered, moving his hips to meet your motions.
Moving your wrist a little faster, you’re so taken with the sounds he’s making you hardly feel the bruising grip he has on your shoulder, grounding himself to you.
“Quinn, wanna taste you,” you whined, watching the precum leak from his pink tip, tongue darting out to lick your lips in anticipation.
“Okay, just-” he shudders, interrupted by a moan, “just, no teeth. And don’t take too much, hollow your mouth out a bit, and keep using your hand if you need to.”
Belly swirling with nerves and excitement, you position yourself a little farther onto the edge of the bed, face to face with his strained cock.
Taking a deep breathe, you test the waters by placing a chaste kiss on his tip, licking the salty precum off of your lips. Opening your mouth, you take the plunge and follow his instructions, hollowing out your cheeks as your mouth rolls over his length, your tongue feeling the weight of his thickness.
You look up at him as he watches you, waiting for any hint of praise in what you’re doing, wanting to make sure you’re doing it right.
“Shit, just like that, baby, keep going,” he encourages, feeling you stop when his tip tickles the back of your throat.
You will yourself not to gag, enjoying the feeling of your tongue against his cock too much. Trying to combat the feeling, you swirl your tongue around him, feeling every ridge and vein.
Quinn is fighting against every muscle in his body, from wanting to bring his hands to your head and push your mouth further onto him, to wanting to snap his hips forward and bury his dick in your throat.
“Can move a bit if you want,” he hisses out as your tongue runs across his sensitive tip once again. “Doing so good, though. Feels unreal. Don’t know how you’ve never done this before.”
You want to smile, but can’t with your mouth full of him, so you start bobbing your head instead, slow and careful. You bring your hand up to cup his balls, remembering one of your friends telling you guys seem to like that.
Quinn jerks his hips forward at the feeling, not being able to control his actions at that point, dangerously close to blowing his load down your throat.
He removes himself from your mouth, watching the spit trail down your chin. The sight is so pornographic he almost finishes anyways, digging his nails into his palms as a distraction.
“Was-,” you start, wiping the dribble off of your mouth, “was I not doing it right? I remember someone telling me once guys liked when you touched them like that. Did I scrape you with my teeth? Did I-“ your hoarse voice is abruptly cut off by Quinn shoving his hands under your arms and lifting you to your feet.
“You were amazing. Too good. If you would’ve kept doing that for even thirty more seconds I would have come in your mouth, and while the thought drives me insane, there’s only one place I want to come tonight,” he tells you, bringing his hand down to untie your soft pajama pants as he finishes his sentence, fingers ghosting over the exposed skin of your stomach.
You suck in a sharp breathe as he starts rolling the pants down your hips, exposing your simple, cotton underwear.
“Well, if I knew this is what we were doing tonight I would’ve dressed more appropriately,” you said softly, wanting nothing more than to bring your arms down to cover the exposed skin.
Quinn chuckles. “You could be wearing a diaper for all I care. I’d still be rock hard at the sight of you like this.”
“Weird, but sweet?” you respond, trying to break up the intensity you feel as you kick the bottoms off of your feet.
Amused smile on his face, Quinn shakes his head at you, toying with the hem of your shirt.
“Can I?” he asks, tugging at the thin material.
You shake your head yes, knowing there’s no going back after this moment.
“Words, babydoll, ‘member?” he mumbles, staring at your taut nipples through the shirt.
“Yes. To everything. I trust you,” you breathe out.
Quinn’s heart jumps to his throat, surprised at how excited the confession makes him. Knowing he has your complete and total trust with something as important as this adds a whole new level to what he’s about to experience with you.
The shirt is over your head before you can think twice, standing almost bare in front of him.
“Shit baby, knew you were stunning,” he starts but pauses, letting his eyes rake over every inch of exposed skin. “but think you were painted just for me,” he worships your body, trailing his fingers over the dips in your collar bones in awe, watching the goosebumps rise in their wake.
“Your turn,” you whisper, feeling the flush on your cheeks, not wanting to be the only one on display.
Not being able to take his eyes off of the smooth skin of your body, he removes the rest of his clothing before you can even blink, staring at the toned man standing in front of you.
Of course you’ve seen him shirtless before, considering he never likes to wear a shirt to bed, and having spent a weekend at his lake home a few months ago. But to see him completely naked before you is a sight you never want to forget.
Breaking the stare you both hold on each other, he moves your body to lay down on the bed, guiding you to move further up the bed as he crawls over you, stopping when your head rests on one of the million pillows.
“Gonna make you feel so good,” he pants from above you, bringing his mouth down to place wet kisses along your neck.
You inhale deeply, the feeling lighting all of your nerves on fire.
Too distracted by the feeling of his tongue darting out to swirl along your skin, you don’t notice his hand has made its way to the band of your underwear, slipping a finger just under the barrier.
“Off, take them off,” you pant out, wanting the fabric gone.
“Yes, ma’am,” he obeys, sliding the material off of your body in record time.
Quinn forgot everything he was supposed to be doing when he saw you bare before him. He could practically smell your arousal, watching your pussy glisten in the low light of the bedroom.
“Bet you taste so good, hmm?” he rasped out, sounding like a man starved.
Squirming, your body fights to find some sort of friction to ease the ache between your legs, never having felt so turned on before.
“What do I need to do? Tell me what to do, Quinny,” you whimper, wanting to know what you’re supposed to be doing, desperate for relief.
Your desperation makes his cock throb, having forgot how hard he was, too distracted by you. But to watch you writhe and whine and look to him for guidance makes him painfully aware of how much this is all affecting him.
“Absolutely nothing. Now it’s my turn to make you feel good, darling,” he all but pants, licking his lips like he’s about to eat a five-star meal.
He moves his body down yours, shamelessly dragging his lips down your warm skin, taking his time and savoring every inch.
Once he reaches your soaking cunt, he teases you with hot breaths, wanting to admire every fold and crevice before exploring you with his mouth.
Placing small kisses on both thighs, letting his scruff scratch the sensitive skin, he finally lets his mouth find your core.
Licking a clean stripe up from your hole to your clit, he grips onto your legs, baffled by how good you taste on his tongue. He dives in like he’s never known such a luxury, slurping and sucking every inch of your perfect pussy.
You’ve never felt anything like this before, the pleasure overwhelming. You don’t know what to do with yourself, feeling like you’re flailing your limbs all over the place. Moaning and grunting, Quinn can sense your frustration with not knowing how to express your pleasure.
“Touch my hair. Pull it, tug it, hold on to it. Whatever you need to do. Just touch me,” he instructs you, the vibration of his words on your clit causing you to cry out, tangling both hands into his soft hair.
Quinn groans at the delicious pull on his scalp as you use his hair as your outlet, feeling his dick brush against the comforter as it twitches. He starts to grind against the mattress, not enough to push him over the edge, but enough to provide him with temporary relief.
He continues his assault on your dripping core, not caring if he were to drown in your arousal, loving how it practically leaks out of you, not wasting a single drop.
Once he feels you’re ready, he brings a finger up, slipping it inside of you and feeling your walls instantly clench around him. The sensation only drives him further, burying his nose deeper into you, if that was even possible.
Pumping his finger in and out of you slowly, he adds a second, ensuring you’re ready for him in the minutes yet to come.
Arching your back at the fullness of two of his long, thick fingers, you carry out a particularly rough tug of his hair, earning a moan so loud you want to do whatever you can to hear it again.
“Feel so good, Q. Never – ah! – knew I could feel like this,” you groaned, digging your heels into the bare skin of his shoulders.
“C’mon, know you’re almost there. Gotta let go f’me,” he grunts against you, feeling the flutter of your walls around him.
The unfamiliar pit in your stomach grows at his voice, never wanting him to stop talking to you.
“Oh, like that, huh? Like when I talk to you, pretty girl? Like when I use my voice while pressed up against your pussy?” Quinn asks you, feeling how you clenched when he spoke.
His vulgarness made the ball of pleasure grow even larger, threatening to pop at any moment.
Quinn hummed against your clit, wrapping his lips around the sensitive bud, inhaling just enough to create a small vacuum of suction.
The new feeling caused something inside of you to explode, a pleasure burning throughout your whole body so intense you think you lose your hearing for a few moments.
Quinn rides you through your orgasm, licking and sucking every drop of physical pleasure from your body. When he removes his mouth from you, you’re laying limp under him, the look of bliss on your face sparking a feeling of pride within him.
You have no clue what just happened to your body, not registering a single thing until you felt Quinn’s fingers running through your damp hair, fluttering your heavy lids open.
“There she is. Thought you went and fell asleep on me,” he chuckles, caressing your bright red cheek.
“mmmm” you hummed out. “Think I can taste colors. What did you just do to me?” you ask him, starting to gain control over your body again.
Quinn full on laughs at you, hiding his face in his bicep. “I think that’s the nicest thing a woman has ever said to me,” he marvels down at your state, knowing he was the first man to ever make you feel like this.
You’re trying to think of a clever or sexy response, but get distracted by something poking your leg. Looking down, you notice how hard and red Quinn’s dick is, remembering that he never finished earlier when you had him in your mouth.
“Oh!” you say in surprise, drawing attention to his…situation.
“What can I say? That was the hottest thing I’ve ever witnessed,” he references your intense release.
You bite your lip, almost embarrassed. “Well, I can think of something hotter,” you say quietly, reaching your hand down to grab his length.
Quinn gasps as the contact, the most sensitive he thinks he’s ever been.
“Now I want to watch you,” you can recognize the sound of your voice, not knowing what having an orgasm did to you.
Crashing his mouth onto yours, the first time he’s kissed you all night, your grips falls from his shaft, bringing your hands up to pull his shoulders closer to your body. The friction of his skin on your hard nipples alone is about to drive you over the edge again.
“Gonna wreck you, you know that? Wreck you like you’ve wrecked me,” Quinn says on your lips, bringing your bottom lip between his teeth before letting it snap back into place.
You don’t know where the sudden rush and roughness came from, but you can’t say you’re disappointed. Something within him snapped hearing you express wanting to watch him come undone under your influence, and Quinn can’t control himself anymore.
“Show me, Q. Show me what I’ve missed all this time,” your mouth is operating on a mind of its own, not sure what part of your brain has been unlocked by Quinn’s magical mouth.
Quinn growls, hiking your leg up to rest around his waist, leaving the other flat on the bed, standing on his knees as he brings his hand to line himself up with your still dripping cunt, causing your hands to fall from his body. His own hand finds one of your full breasts, toying with the nipple, causing a sharp gasp to fall from your lips.
“Ready?” his voice goes soft for a second, wanting to make sure you’re still good.
“Please,” you whine in response, shaking your head yes.
As he slowly sinks himself into you, he realizes that he’s found his new favorite place. Buried deep inside of your heat, the warm squeeze against his rigid cock, is what he was put on this earth to enjoy, he thinks to himself.
Your whimpers are the perfect soundtrack as he slides himself in and out of your slick, worried he’ll slip right out if he pulls out too much. The ease with which he glides through convinces him you were made for him. Every inch of you, made to be ruined by him.
“Tell me how to move,” you moan out. “Tell me how to make this – shit! – better for you. Teach me.”
Just like before, hearing you whine and beg for him to teach you, wanting to learn from him, has him losing all of his resolve. He completely slips himself out of you, slamming back into you with such force it takes your breathe away.
Hearing your gasp, Quinn brings his hand down, pressing on your lower belly to intensify the feeling of how deep he is inside of you right now.
“You’re perfect. Doing so good f’me. Best little student ever, know exactly what to do without even being told,” Quinn praises you, causing your brain to short circuit.
“Just wanna make you feel good, Q. Don’t wanna take all the fun for myself,” you respond to him, bringing your arms back up to the skin of his broad shoulders, raking your nails down the clammy skin, not realizing the burn of your nails down his back is the final string for Quinn.
He cries out, not wanting to come before you, but he’s so close he doesn’t think he can hold out any longer.
Mustering all the resolve he has left, he removes his hand from your belly, bringing it down to circle your clit, pinching it every so lightly.
He feels it the second you reach your second release tonight, the squeeze of your walls as they clench around him making it impossible for him to pull out, triggering his own orgasm to leave his body and leak into you in spurts.
His body shakes from the sensation, letting out some of the most pornographic noises even he’s ever heard. And he was once a teenage boy with unlimited access to the internet.
The two of you come down from your highs together, Quinn’s hand letting your leg fall back down onto the bed, and slowly removing his softening cock from you, both of you whining at the loss of contact.
He flops down next to you, needing a moment to recover before he made any move to clean either of you up.
“So…that’s what I’ve missed out on for all these years?” you asked out loud through shallow breaths, not even turning your head to look at Quinn.
Quinn managed a small laugh, replying with a small “Told you it was them, not you.”
You turned on your side to finally look at your sexed out boyfriend, admiring the way his hair was damp with sweat and his lip was swollen and red from biting it out of pleasure.
“Well…I don’t think I quite grasped the concept. I think we need to do it again,” you proposed. “You know, for study purposes,” you shrugged.
And Quinn knew you were (mostly) joking, but he’ll be damned if his dick wasn’t already half hard again, not knowing what he was going to do with you now. A monster of his own creation.
#quinn hughes x you#quinn hughes fanfiction#quinn hughes one shot#quinn hughes x reader#quinn hughes fic#quinn hughes blurb#quinn hughes smut#quinn hughes imagine#quinn hughes#qh43#hockey#nhl#hockey smut#hockey fic#hockey imagine#nhl blurb#nhl oneshot#nhl imagine#nhl fanfic#nhl fic#nhl fanfiction#nhl hockey#nhl x reader#quinn hughes x y/n
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A Guide to Chinese Names & Nicknames for your Fandom Needs (Part 1)
I made this guide with my different CMedia fandoms in mind, but it should apply to any other Chinese media.
Something that has been irking me a lot since To Be Hero X penetrated the mainstream English fandom spaces is how many people keep referring to the characters by just their surnames 😭. It sounds weird and demonstrates a lack of knowledge on Chinese culture in general. I don’t blame these people, though. A lot of the TBHX fans are new to donghua, and we’re also past the era of fansubs with detailed translation notes.
However, it’s no excuse to stay ignorant. To help you avoid making the same mistake again, here’s a Chinese names guide for your fanfic and meta needs.
Disclaimer: I am not Chinese, but I have been studying the language for years and also engage in a lot of CMedia. So, I do know some stuff. Regardless, if you find any errors in this post, feel free to tell me so I can correct it.
Note: Fandom-specific examples are written in small text like this.
Post last updated: May 29, 2025
Essentials
1. Chinese name order is Surname first, followed by Given Name.
Chinese surnames are usually only one syllable, making it easy to figure out which character in the full name is the surname. Just look at the first one.
However, there are a few two-syllable surnames, like Sima, Ouyang, Zhuge, etc. You may refer to this list for other two-syllable surnames.
In Link Click, Liu Siwen’s partner is named Ouyang, and in some subs it’s written as Ou Yang. However, Ouyang is actually just her surname, since her father is named Ouyang Bubai. We don’t know daughter!Ouyang’s given name. I also don’t understand why Liu Siwen would call her by just surname...
2. Calling someone by both their surname and given name is the neutral, normal way to call anyone.
To those calling Lu Guang and Cheng Xiaoshi as just Lu and Cheng, and Lin Ling and Yang Cheng as just Lin and Yang… Please don’t. Who tf are those 😭
2.2. But in some stories, characters may not have surnames.

In the danmei (Chinese BL) novel Bestial Blade, the setting is a prehistoric-ish tribal society where nobody has surnames. Although some characters may have two-character names, the first character is actually part of the given name and not a surname. In the case of characters with only one-chara given names, affixes/honorifics are added when addressing them. This will be explained later.
2.3. Nobody calls anyone by only one syllable, unless there’s a special reason behind it.
Example 1: In To Be Hero X episode 8, every child in the orphanage has no surname and go by only a one-character given name. But nobody really calls Qing/Cyan as just “Qing.” It’s not always in the English subtitles, but children and adults alike actually call Qing as Xiao Qing (Little Qing). The “xiao” is a term of endearment, and it’s explained later on in this post. At one point, the orphanage director also calls her by the nickname “Qing Qing.”
The one time Xiao Qing was called with only “Qing” in this episode was at the end, when the orphanage director got mad at her. Not using xiao or her nickname at that moment was really chilling.
Example 2: In the danmei novel Your Distance, there were instances where the male lead Bai Changyi addressed the protagonist Ting Shuang by just “Ting.” This sounds weird, but it’s fine ’cause it was on purpose. In the context of the story (two Chinese men living in Germany) and the relationship between the characters at that time (not that close), it sounded as if Bai Changyi was trying to keep his distance from Ting Shuang by refusing to associate with him like how one would with a fellow Chinese.
3. A close family member calling you by full name and without any honorific can be odd.
Like, imagine your mom calling you by full name. Once or twice, it sounds like you’re in trouble (re: Lucky Cyan example in 2.3). But all the time? Your mom hates you.
Nicknames or given name+honorific is more normal.
This doesn’t apply to Cheng Xiaoshi and Qiao Ling from Link Click, even though they canonically consider each other as siblings. Idk, maybe because they have different surnames and aren’t really blood-related? Anyways, how they address each other is fine. And considering how they get along with each other, I also think they’d find those affectionate nicknames cringe 😂
4. If the given name is more than one syllable, then it’s fine to address that person by only given name and without any affixes and honorifics. This is an indication of closeness/familiarity.
e.g. In Link Click: Xia Fei calling Cheng Xiaoshi as only “Xiaoshi.”
However, there are instances where an older person may call a younger person by given name even if they aren’t that close. Like, a preschool teacher addressing their student by only given name is acceptable.
In family, an elder addressing someone from the younger generation with only given name is also normal, regardless of how close they are. But the opposite is not true. It is generally considered rude for someone younger to call an older relative by only given name.
Chinese Nicknames via Name Variation
5. It can be formed by repeating a syllable in the person’s name.
This, for me, is the most affectionate way to address someone. It sounds very cute.
Lin Ling (林凌) from To Be Hero X can be called Ling Ling (凌凌), and that’s why the Chinese fandom abbreviates his name as 00. In Chinese, zero is 零, which is also pronounced as líng.
5.2. However, be careful in choosing which syllable to repeat because you might end up with a nickname that doesn’t sound nice.
In Link Click S1E1, Cheng Xiaoshi laughed when Qiao Ling called Lu Guang “Guang Guang.” This is because Guang Guang sounds a lot like wang wang, the Chinese onomatopoeia for a dog’s bark. (Some subs translated “Guang Guang” as “good boy” to get the joke across.)
In a similar vein, please don’t nickname Wang Qing as Wang Wang 😭. Qing Qing 青青 is much prettier; it sounds like the qingqing 轻轻 that means “softly” or “gently.”
5.3 Also consider how you’re portraying a character in your fic.
Would Vein from Link Click, whose Chinese name is Xiāo Wèiyǐng 萧未影, be comfortable being called Yǐng Yǐng 影影? The tones are different, but if you say it fast enough the sound isn’t that far from the yīngyīng 嘤嘤 which is a cutesy way of crying in text online (similar to “huhuhu” in English).
Xiāo Xiāo 萧萧 also sounds close to xiǎo xiǎo 小小, which means tiny.
Xiao Xiao and Ying Ying don’t really sound “manly,” but they’re not exactly bad nicknames either (I think). Just consider the context of your story before going with any of them. If unsure, consult a dictionary or a native Chinese speaker.
6. Adding the prefix ā 阿 for monosyllabic names.
This is more common in Southern China.
In To Be Hero X, Ahu’s name is actually the prefix ā 阿 + the character hǔ 虎, which means “tiger.”
In Mo Dao Zu Shi, Wei Ying is called A’Ying. In Bestial Blade, every female supporting character in the Black Eagle tribe is named with the prefix ā 阿 + a one-character given name.
You can only append ā 阿 to one character. So, no “A’Wei Ying.” Just A’Ying.
7. Adding the suffix 儿 (-r or -er).
This is more common in Northern China.
Like ā 阿, -er is only added to one syllable
It is often added to the last syllable of the given name
The subtitles don’t show it, but Nezha, from the Demon Child movie, is called Zha’er by his parents.
8. Adding the word 小 xiǎo (little) before the name.
You add this before the name of those younger than you or subordinate to you.
In Link Click S2, Liu Lan actually calls Li Tianxi “Xiao Xi.” But in some subtitles, they put in “Xixi,” probably for English localization.
When done among relatives and family friends, it is a neutral, informal way of calling someone. Cute, but also doesn’t express any special-ness since it’s no surprise for an aunt to call her niece as Xiao + Given Name. Still much more affectionate than just calling them by given name, though.
However, when done in a work setting…
a boss calling one employee with Xiao + Surname expresses some degree of favorability, especially if they still call the other employees by full name.
An older employee calling their younger boss with Xiao would sound like they’re not taking them seriously because of their age.
An old, mature boss calling their reckless new and young recruit with Xiao could indicate they think their employee is childish.
So yeah, it all depends on context as well as the speaker’s tone when they say it.
Xiao + Given Name is often used for children.
e.g. Empress Wu from White Cat Legend calls Li Bing “Xiao Bing-za.” Ignore the “za” for now, but the fact that an Empress is calling her subject with Xiao + Given Name is enough to show how much she favors Li Bing. Or maybe she just thinks he’s like a little kid, since she is waaay older than him. (Don’t be fooled by her young facade; she’s an old lady.) Regardless, “Xiao Bing-za” sounds very informal.
Xiao + Repeated Syllable (re: #5) sounds really cute. A bit childish, perhaps, but it really depends on context and tone.
Not a fandom example, but I used to call my cat Xiao Maomao (little cat cat)
9. Adding the word 老 lǎo (old) before the surname.
This is like the opposite of xiao, and it comes across as more rough/casual. Compared to xiao, it has more of a “bro” vibe.
Lao is often used for those older than you, while xiao for those younger.
But between those of the same age, you can use either depending on the kind of tone you want to achieve (re: #8 for notes on xiao)
If you use lao for someone younger, it could come off as ingratiating or extremely respectful.
Link Click: I can imagine Cheng Xiaoshi addressing Lu Guang as “Lao Lu” when begging him for a difficult favor 😂
That’s all for now! For a more comprehensive guide on Chinese nicknames, check out these resources:
How to Address Chinese People Correctly – Appellations in Chinese
30+ Chinese Nicknames: A Guide to Popular Choices and Cultural Significance
In part 2 of this post, I will talk about Chinese honorifics.
#this was supposed to be a quick bullet-point guide#but then i got carried away#chinese#chinese langblr#chinese names#to be hero x#tu bian yingxiong x#凸变英雄X#tbhx#link click#shiguang dailiren#时光代理人#white cat legend#大理寺日志#dali si rizhi#donghua#danmei#cmedia#cnovels#bestial blade#nezha#nezha birth of the demon child#ne zha#哪吒之魔童降世#miyamiwu.tl#miyamiwu.src#miyamiwu.info
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ᨳ♡₊➳ teaching choso how to use a phone hcs
ᨳ♡₊➳ choso x reader
ᨳ♡₊➳ pure crack with fluff
₊⊹. You finally convinced Choso to get a smartphone because, honestly, the idea of your 150-year-old, half-cursed spirit boyfriend wandering the city without a way to contact you was stressing you out. Unfortunately, the first time he activates Siri, he immediately becomes obsessed. He spends the next hour having a full conversation with her, convinced she’s some omniscient, all-knowing woman trapped inside the device.
“Who is this? How does she know the weather?” he asks, genuinely amazed.
You try to explain AI, but he just frowns. “So she’s… not real?”
You confirm, but he doesn’t believe you. He starts saying “please” and “thank you” to her, thinking it’s the polite thing to do, and when Siri responds with “I live to serve,” he turns to you with wide eyes. “She’s loyal. I respect her.”
Later, you catch him whispering to Siri at 2 AM. “Siri, what is rizz?” She gives him a Wikipedia definition, and he nods solemnly, as if she just revealed the meaning of life.
₊⊹. When Choso first opens the front camera it's purely by accident and he jumps because he thinks someone is staring at him.
It takes you ten minutes to explain that it’s his own face.
He looks at the screen, frowning. “Why do I look like that?”
“What do you mean?”
“I thought I looked…better.”
₊⊹. You teach Choso how to properly use the camera app, and he’s instantly hooked. The problem? He has zero concept of angles. Every selfie he sends you looks like it was taken by a dad who just discovered Facebook.
One is a close-up of his forehead. Another is 90% his nose. A few are taken at such an unflattering angle that you physically recoil. You try to guide him, but he insists that “this is my true form.”
The worst part? He never realizes he’s sending them. He just accidentally spams you with the most nightmarish, low-quality images imaginable. One time, he sends you a blurry picture of his eye, and when you ask what it means, he just responds, “I see you.”
You live in fear of opening your notifications.
₊⊹. At first, Choso types like an old man who just discovered the internet. Every message is unnecessarily formal and it takes him fifteen minutes to type a single one. “I hope this message finds you well. I am currently at the grocery store. Do you require anything?” You tell him he doesn’t have to type like he’s drafting a letter in the 1800s, but he doesn’t get it.
₊⊹. You made the grave mistake of teaching Choso how to use Google, and now he types full, grammatically correct sentences into the search bar like it’s a formal letter.
“Dear Google, can you die from drinking too much orange juice? Sincerely, Choso.”
At one point, he panics because he thinks he’s talking to a real person at Google.
“Dear Google, do you sleep? Do you need a break? I worry for you. Sincerely, Choso."
₊⊹. One day, you introduce Choso to the concept of voice messages because he struggles with typing. He loves it. But because his voice is naturally deep and monotone, everything he sends sounds like a mafia boss delivering an ultimatum.
You: “Hey, what do you want to eat?”
Choso: "Stay put. I will find you.”
You: “Do you need anything from the store?”
Choso: “It is already too late.”
He never means it that way. He’s just bad at tone. One time, he accidentally holds down the record button for three minutes, so all you get is the sound of him breathing heavily while a distant microwave beeps.
Another time, he sends you a 15-second voice memo that is just him sighing deeply followed by:
“…I saw a pigeon today.”
Then he sends another:
“…It was looking at me weird.”
Then another:
“…I don’t trust it.”
That’s it. No context. You’re in the middle of work and have to excuse yourself because you’re laughing too hard.
₊⊹. The first time Choso sends an email, he notices the little “Sent from my iPhone” signature at the bottom. You forget to explain that it’s automatic, so he thinks he has to manually type it out every single time, email or text.
It doesn’t matter what the message is.
“Good morning. Did you sleep well? Sent from my iPhone.”
“Do you want McDonald’s? Sent from my iPhone.”
You don’t have the heart to correct him.
₊⊹. He also discovers autocorrect. One time, he meant to text “Good night.” but autocorrect changed it to “God nut.” You have never known fear like receiving a 2 AM message from him that just says "God nut." with no context.
₊⊹. You introduce Choso to the concept of online shopping, thinking it’ll be harmless. It is not. He immediately becomes addicted to buying the weirdest things. He orders a 200-pack of rubber ducks. He doesn’t even like rubber ducks that much. He just thought it was fun.
₊⊹. Choso has zero understanding of what’s a scam. He clicks on everything. Every pop-up, every link, every “Congratulations! You’ve won a free iPad!” ad. He has installed seven viruses in one week. He sends you a link: “Look! This website is selling a brand-new TV for only $5!” You tell him it’s a scam. He doesn’t believe you. “No, see, it says ‘totally real, not a scam’ in the description.”
At one point, he proudly tells you he got a message saying he won $1,000,000, and all he has to do is send them his bank details.
“Choso, no.”
“But they said—”
“Choso, please block them.”
“But what if—”
“Block them.”
He sulks like a kicked puppy and mutters about how it seemed like a good opportunity.
₊⊹. Choso doesn’t trust “the ghost box” (your Bluetooth speaker). The first time you paired it to your own phone, the automated voice said, “Connected.” Choso froze. Looked you dead in the eye.
“Who was that. WHO WAS THAT."
₊⊹. The first time Choso accidentally took a screenshot, he thought he broke the phone.
He ran to you, panicked and waving his phone around.
“I don’t know what I did, but the screen—it remembers.”
You explain that it’s just a screenshot and show him how to do it on purpose. Now, he takes screenshots of everything like an old man who doesn’t trust the internet.
“What if they delete this? I need to keep evidence.” (It’s just a recipe for banana bread.)
₊⊹. One time, he accidentally took a picture of your face mid-sneeze and he decided to set it as his lock screen. Now, every time he unlocks his phone, he sees your cursed sneeze face.
He refuses to change it. He says it’s sentimental.
“It reminds me of your strength.”
₊⊹. Choso does not understand emojis. At all. You try to explain their meanings, but he insists on using them his own way.
Example: He once texted you, “Thinking about you. ❤️🛐🔥🔪🐍🚬”
You immediately call him, asking if this is a threat. He is confused. “What? No. The heart means I like you. The prayer hands mean I respect you. The fire means you’re attractive. The knife means I’d protect you. The snake means you’re clever. The cigarette means you’re cool.”
₊⊹. Despite all of this, Choso is genuinely trying. He wants to learn because he likes talking to you, his brother, and staying connected. He still struggles, but he remembers what you teach him. He still sends weird messages, but they’re sweet and he means well. And when he finally figures out FaceTime, he lights up.
“Now I can see you anytime,” he says softly. “That’s nice.”
That alone makes it all worth it.
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#choso x reader#choso kamo#jjk imagines#jjk scenarios#jjk crack#jjk fluff#choso x you#choso x y/n#choso#jjk headcanons#jjk hcs
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PICK A CARD: Your Sweetest & Most Lovable Qualities ✮⋆˙

I. II. III.
How to Pick Your Pile: Take a deep breath, clear your mind, and look at the images above. Which one pulls you in the most? Trust your gut! Once you choose the image, The number below your chosen image is your pile. If more than one catches your eye, that just means there’s extra tea for you, go ahead and read both!
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⋆𐙚₊˚Pile I
So, we’ve got, Yeah, I know big cards for a topic about your most endearing qualities. Oh, and before we go any further, let me just say this. I couldn’t pull more than three cards for this pile for some reason. To me, that’s the universe saying, This is it. This is all they need to know. This is the energy of someone who has lived, felt, and somehow turned all the chaos of life into something beautiful, tender, and deeply lovable. But that’s exactly what makes this reading so powerful. You’re not someone whose sweetness is obvious on the surface.
This pile is the softest in a "you don’t even realize how powerful your love is" kind of way.
listen, if these cards were in a different context, I’d be holding your hand and whispering, “Babe, brace yourself,” but here? These two cards are telling me that your most lovable quality is how you handle endings, transformations, and straight-up life-altering moments. You don’t cling when things need to be let go. You don’t fear the crumbling because you know something better is waiting to be built. And that? That’s what makes people soft for you. There’s something heartbreakingly tender about a person who has seen destruction but still chooses to believe in new beginnings. You give off this aura of quiet strength, like someone who’s been through the fire but still keeps their hands warm enough to comfort others. People feel safe with you, not because life is always stable around you (The Tower says otherwise, babe), but because you’ve shown time and time again that no matter how much things collapse, you will always rebuild. And let’s talk about how unexpectedly comforting you are. You’re not the person who hands out surface-level advice like “everything happens for a reason” (ugh, no). You’re the one who sits with people in their mess, in their heartbreak, in their uncertainty, and just exists with them, without judgment. And somehow, through your presence alone, you make people believe that they, too, will get through it. (OMG PILE 1, i wanna give you people such a big hug 😭😭 I seriously felt like crying while writing this pile, the energies were so heavy yet so soft) See, your kindness isn’t loud. It’s not the type that announces itself in grand gestures or obvious ways. It’s the kind that sneaks up on people. The kind that makes someone pause one day and think, “Wow, I didn’t even realize how much I needed them.” You don’t just offer stability, you are stability. Not because your life is always in order (again, The Tower says you’ve had your fair share of chaos), but because you know how to find steadiness even in uncertainty. You’re like a lighthouse in the storm, always there, always steady, guiding people home without needing to be asked. And people adore this about you. There’s something profoundly lovable about someone who makes others feel grounded without even trying. Whether it’s through your words, your actions, or just the way you carry yourself, you give people a sense of belonging. You’re not the kind of person who opens up easily, and that’s part of what makes your sweetness so special.
You don’t hand out trust like free samples at a store. No, honey, people have to work for it. And when they do? They’re met with something so rare, loyalty, unwavering support, and a kind of love that says, “I will stand by you even when everything else falls apart.” And that? That makes people soft for you in a way that’s hard to put into words. People may not always realize it at first, but once they do, they never forget you. You’re the kind of person whose absence is felt. The kind of person who, once someone has experienced your presence, nothing else quite measures up.
So, to sum this all up? Your most endearing, lovable qualities aren’t the kind that everyone immediately recognizes. You’re not “sweet” in the conventional, sunshine-and-rainbows way. You’re sweet in the way that a person feels when they’ve finally found home after being lost for so long. You’re sweet in the way that endings feel bittersweet but necessary. You’re sweet in the way that rebirth always holds a quiet kind of hope. And that? That’s a kind of sweetness that can’t be replicated.
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⋆𐙚₊˚Pile II
Alright, bestie, let’s get into Pile 2 because this reading? Oh, it’s personal. VERY PERSONAL.
So, looking at Four of Cups, Queen of Pentacles, Five of Pentacles, and The Sun, I’m getting such a specific and beautiful energy from you. You’re the type of person whose sweetness isn’t immediately obvious to everyone, it’s something people earn the right to see. Your love, your warmth, your kindness? It’s not just out there for anyone to take. It’s guarded, not because you’re cold, but because you know the value of your heart.Pile 2 people, your love feels like home. They are the ones who will wrap you up in warmth, make sure you’ve eaten, and remind you that you are loved even on the days you feel invisible.
I can tell you’re someone who has felt neglected in the past. Maybe you’ve been that person who showed up for others but didn’t always get the same in return. Maybe you’ve had moments where you wondered, Does anyone even see me? But here’s the thing, this has shaped you into someone so rare, so deeply precious. You don’t just give your love freely, you give it intentionally. And when you do? It changes people.There’s something so tender about someone who understands what it’s like to feel left out in the cold but still chooses to be warm. You don’t just give surface-level kindness; you make people feel safe. Your energy is like a soft, golden light in a world that can sometimes feel too harsh. the Queen of Pentacles energy sitting right in the middle of this spread, i see it as one of the main qualities of yours. You are the nurturer, the provider, the person whose presence feels like a deep breath after a long day. But what makes this so beautiful is that you don’t flaunt it. You’re not out here shouting, Look at me, I’m kind! No, your love is quiet. It’s the type that sneaks up on people when they realize, Damn, I’ve never felt this safe before.
You have this incredible ability to make people feel valued. Not just liked, not just appreciated, but genuinely, wholeheartedly valued. And you don’t do it in a way that’s over-the-top or performative, you do it in the little things. The way you remember the small details about people, the way you check in even when they don’t ask, the way you offer comfort without making a big deal about it. That’s your magic. But here’s the thing, you don’t just give, give, give anymore. I see it in this spread. You’ve learned that your love is not a free buffet; it’s a carefully prepared meal, and only those who truly appreciate it get a seat at your table. And honestly? That’s one of the most lovable things about you. You don’t let just anyone into your world, but when you do? You give them something real, something they’ll never find anywhere else.
Oh, babe, do you even know how bright you shine? Because let me tell you, you don’t always see it, but others do. There’s this thing about you, you don’t even realize how much joy you bring to people just by existing. You might be the type who’s so used to being strong as we talked about how you are used to being neglected so you have now developed this coping mechanism , to carrying your own burdens, that you don’t notice how much your presence lifts others up. But trust me, people see it. You have this warm, radiant energy that just feels good to be around. And it’s not the loud, center-of-attention kind of warmth. It’s the kind that makes people feel like they can be themselves. The kind that makes them feel lighter, freer, happier.
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⋆𐙚₊˚Pile lll
First off, the fact that you got two Major Arcana cards in this reading? Yeah, this isn’t just about your surface-level sweetness. You people are the softest in the way that you inspire other people to keep going.
Starting off with this spread here, and oh my god, bestie, do you even realize how much you carry on your own? Like, I’m not even talking about small worries, I mean the deep, sleepless-night kind of overthinking. The taking on everyone else’s pain while pushing yours aside type of energy. y’all are like a walking contrast in the best way possible. On one hand, you carry a lot of internal battles, but on the other hand, you are the biggest source of light for others. And that’s what makes you so incredibly lovable. Your softness isn’t just about being gentle, it’s about being brave enough to keep believing in something better, even when life has knocked you down. You feel things deeply, and honestly? That’s what makes you so lovable. Here’s the thing: your softness isn’t in being effortlessly sweet, it’s in being brave enough to still love despite everything you’ve been through. You’ve had moments where you felt alone, where you thought, No one sees what I’m going through. But you never let that turn you cold. Instead, you became the person who helps others feel less alone. You are the definition of “I got you” energy, the friend, the lover, the safe space that people don’t even realize they need until they meet you. You make people feel understood, like they don’t have to carry things by themselves anymore. And that? That is rare. Now, let’s talk about The Star, because, DAMN, you don’t even realize how much of a light you are, do you? This card sitting right here tells me something crazy beautiful about you, You make people believe in good things again. You are literally hope personified. i think You people give the best motvational speeches Lol. You don’t sugarcoat things, but somehow you always know the right thing to say to pull someone out of their darkness. You remind people that life keeps moving, and better days are coming. You have this infectious “Why not?” attitude.
And what’s wild? You do this without even realizing it. Like, you’ll say something casually, and days later, someone’s still thinking about it, because you saw something in them that they didn’t even see in themselves. That’s your magic. Your love is quiet, but it’s healing. But here’s where it gets interesting, The Fool. And I love, love, LOVE this placement because this tells me your most lovable quality isn’t just your strength, it’s your ability to keep going. Like, after everything? You still believe in new beginnings. You still take risks with your heart. You still trust that there’s more to life than just pain and struggle. People are drawn to you because you remind them that it’s okay to start over. That it’s okay to try, to love, to hope, even after things have hurt them. And that’s something so rare. Because most people who’ve been through what you’ve been through? They shut down. But you? You open up. You jump, even when you’re scared. You let life surprise you. And that? That’s love in its purest form.
Your sweetness isn’t in being overly bubbly or outwardly affectionate, it’s in being real. In being the person who gets up even when life knocks them down. In being the kind of love that doesn’t demand attention but changes lives just by existing. And that? That’s a love the world doesn’t see enough of.
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Note: tarot cards provide guidance and possible insights into what could happen based on current energies, thoughts, and actions. the cards can highlight potential paths or outcomes, but they do not fixedly predict the future. this is a general reading so take what resonates!
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‘i told you once, that only two things will have me; you and death.’
☀︎|tags. gojo satoru x female reader. fluff, angst, comfort. themes of insecurity: trust issues kinda (by reader). reader gets called ‘baby, princess, angel’. self indulgent. proof read? whats that
“aww, there’s my hardworking girl,” satoru coos whilst his arms move to hold your body captive against his chest in a much needed hug, “and she’s still lookin’ as pretty as ever! my god — c’mere.”
your over-excited lover cups your face in his hands and holds it like that for a second to admire. his thumb slides from your cheekbone to your lips, gently parting them before pressing a deep kiss to your mouth. of course, he doesn’t leave it by that. satoru never does.
“pretty,” a kiss on your right cheek — “beautiful,” a kiss on your left one — “gorgeous,” a kiss on the tip of your nose — “amazing”, a kiss on your forehead — “sweetest,” a kiss on your chin — “lovely”, a kiss on the top of your head;
maybe it was the stress of the previous days that made you tear up. satoru has made it a daily routine: you come home, he welcomes you with open arms, showers you with his unending love and attention until you physically have to pull him away from your body. you sometimes ask yourself what you did to deserve someone so loving.
if satoru had heard you say the latter out loud, he would have kissed your mouth again to shut the thought down instantly. ‘you deserve everything and more’, you silently recall him saying once.
“stop that.” you mutter. the ‘that’ referring to the butterfly kisses and tight hugs he’s giving you. you tried not to seem in the mood for receiving his affection today. the muffled giggles leaving through your gritted teeth tell another story however.
“nu-uh,” satoru lets out a low chuckle, going right back to giving you what you deserve, “it’s like you’re askin’ me to stop breathing, baby. i can’t just not do this.”
satoru lifts you up into his strong arms and brings you over to the kitchen counter, settling you there - somewhere away from all that he had been cooking since the morning. he’s grinning from ear to ear, glancing from the covered plates near the stove and back to you.
you tilt your head curiously as you watch satoru grab one plate and uncover it, revealing the content like it was a big surprise—
“open up f’me, my princess.” your lover hums as he’s already guiding a piece of cake to your lips. your favorite cake which he had oh-so-obviously cooked himself judging by the messy look of it. your gaze lingers on the piece for a second to appreciate the gesture.
when you look back up at satoru, his eyes are already on yours — patiently waiting for you to let him feed you. his blue eyes are sparkling with a sense of pure excitement; one he only has around you. his love for you was almost overwhelming at times like these.
“why?”
the simple, one word question made the white sorcerer stop in his tracks. his head cocks to the side, eyelashes fluttering lightly in confusion, though the handsome smile on his face remains. ‘why’ could mean a lot of things in this context; why do you want to feed me? why do you want me to eat this? why should or even would i?
out of all the possible interpretations, satoru knew the exact one you had meant the moment he saw the tears that welled up at the corners of your eyes; ‘why do you care so much?’
“do i need a reason to?” his voice was smooth and soft. almost way too soft now that he’s realised just how vulnerable you were in front of him. satoru’s smile only widens, however — the sight of his girlfriend being overwhelmed by his affection was one he couldn’t resist.
it’s part of your charm. the charm you don’t know about; the charm that made the gojo satoru fall head over heels for you. your lover shakes his head with a light-hearted laugh, putting the slice of cake back down on the plate so he could hold your hands in his.
“i love you, yeah?” he kisses the back of your hands with utmost care before planting another one on your forehead again. satoru cradles your head against his chest afterwards, making you rest your weary body against his for as long as you needed it; his warmth and comfort, “it’s because i love you. that’s the only reason why, angel.”
you just nod in response — needing a moment of silence to recover, which satoru grants you without it having to be asked verbally. it’s like he knows just what goes on in your little head and is always updated about your changing feelings.
that’s what surprises you most. satoru’s super attentive to every single detail about you. from your unnoticeable habits to the big facts. that is what love truly is. that is how it feels like to have a man love you unconditionally—without any underlying or ulterior motives. without expecting anything back.
“i love you too, ‘toru. forever.” you reply eventually in a hushed whisper. the sorcerer only tightens his grip around your body, hugging you closer to his chest like his personal plushie. he nuzzles his nose into your hair — your scent both relaxing yet addicting.
“yeah,” satoru sighs in content and closes his eyes—allowing them to rest. all his senses are focused on making you feel better. he won’t let go of you until he’s sure you understand that you’re deserving of it all; his loving hugs, kisses, words of affirmation, gifts, comfort, cuddles and support.
“forever and beyond that.”
satoru doesn’t mind reminding you how much he cherishes you. even if he has to remind you every day until the day he succumbs. you’re his number one priority; he’ll even make sure to tell you he loves you with his dying breath when the time comes.
he’ll make sure of it.
#sttoru writes.#jjk x reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojo x reader#jjk x you#jjk fluff#jjk fic#jjk x y/n#gojo fic#jjk x female reader#please im half asleep while upldoading this
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You Don’t Own Me
SERIES MASTERLIST
Chris Sturniolo lives by his own rules, refusing to be controlled. Some see him as a rebel, a troublemaker—but is that the full truth? Meanwhile, Y/N is focused on making the most of her last year of high school, determined to have a normal teenage experience. But when their worlds collide, they realize they may have more in common than they ever expected.
WARNINGS: COPYRIGHT NOTICE. PLEASE READ AND LOOK UP DEFINITIONS OF WARNINGS FOR FURTHER CLARIFICATION. HUGE TW FOR THIS CHAPTER. CSA (only mentioned, not described), heavy angst.
A/N: This song was a huge inspo for me when planning this series. Although I love the true meaning relating to lovers, I think the lyrics can hold weight in other contexts too
With love and big tits, Rose
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P26: Remember it...
“Chris?”
God, I feel dizzy. My body is heavy with sleep, my eyes drooping as I slowly wander towards the kitchen, following the echo of a loud clunk of something falling.
He probably dropped my water bottle. I hope it’s not dented, but I really hope he didn’t accidentally drop it on his fucking toe—that shit hurts. I’ve had a purple toe to prove just how much that stupid metal water bottle hurts being dropped on a foot.
My brows furrow as I hear a slight shuffle of noise—too much noise for just one pair of footsteps. I walk a little faster, my heart hammering in my chest as I round the corner from the hallway into the kitchen.
It’s just…Chris?
Damn. Am I really that delusional right now?
Attempting to rub the sleep from my eyes, I yawn while hearing his footsteps come closer. The feeling of his arms swarming around me makes my body relax into his hold, the touch of the cold metal water bottle against my arm making me curl away from the object.
As I go to pull away to escape the ice metal sensation, I feel Chris tug me under one of his arms, flipping me around so I’m nuzzled under his hold as he starts to walk back towards my room, guiding us as I follow his movements.
“Sorry—just…just dropped your water.” he says, his voice rushed, like an anxious worry of adrenaline from making such a commotion in the middle of the night. “-let’s go back to sleep, c’mon.”
Ugh, sleep. That’s what I need—that’s what my body is desperate for right now. I can tell my balance gets sloppy. My weight leans against him as I hear him hiss out like he’s in pain.
What the hell?
Before I can even stand up straight enough to get a good glance at him, Chris pulls me back into the bed, immediately holding me against his chest as we both lay on our sides.
“Are—are you okay?” I mumble, my words sluggish and slow as he starts to soothe his fingers over the top of my back, lulling me back to sleep quickly.
“Yeah, I–yeah, just…just dropped your water on my foot, but it didn’t do any real damage, just stings a bit. Just….go back to sleep, baby,” he says, holding me tighter.
Sleep consumes my senses faster than usual. His soothing voice and delicate touch makes it impossible for my mind to rush to any thoughts except for how content everything feels. He clutches me closely, a bit tighter than he’d been holding me previously—and I swear I feel him shiver, some sort of vibration that makes me nuzzle even further into him subconsciously.
This is so peaceful. It’s impossible to feel anything but pure calmness as I let myself sink into exhaustion.
___
The morning breeze seeping through the window is peaceful, but cold—brutally cold. My eyes shoot open as I reach out, feeling nothing but empty sheets next to me.
“Chris?” I ask, my voice still scratchy from sleep.
Oh.
He’s gone.
Reaching over, I grab my phone off my nightstand, trying to swallow the lump in my throat as my chest grows heavy. The screen reflects black for a second, my sullen expression making me more aware of reality as I tap the device, seeing the digital pixels light up as I read a text.
From Chris: Hey, don’t freak out, I just headed home a bit early. I’ll explain later, I’m sorry.
Why’s he sorry?
Oh god.
No.
We said I love you last night, did he not actually mean it?
My chest heaves up and down as I try to suck in deep breaths, my eyes watering as I feel shallow sighs leave my quivering lip. He seemed so genuine with his words. How could that sort of emotion be just from the heat of the moment?
That can’t be it, I refuse to even let my brain try to convince me.
I saw his eyes—I heard his words. He meant it. I know in my soul that he meant it.
Words don’t just feel like that. Confessions that are that deep and vulnerable can’t be faked.
So what went wrong?
Before I can think any further, I hear a knock on the door, my eyes widening before I relax, remembering Chris isn’t here and there’s no reason to freak out about getting caught. Although, I kinda wish he was. I want him here, even if it means getting in trouble.
The door creaks open as Baylen peeks his head in. My eyes furrow as he gazes across my room, almost as if he’s searching for something.
“Hey, uh–” he continues looking, scratching the back of his neck as he fully steps into my room, “-how’d you sleep?” he asks, his eyes darting to my bathroom and my open closet with curiosity.
He knows—he has to know. There hasn’t been a single day in the past couple years where he’s ever waltzed into my room, asking how I slept. Especially not with such wandering eyes.
“Baylen?” I ask, my body freezing as he looks towards me with an unreadable expression.
I can feel it. Deep in my gut, the look in his eyes makes everything pulse with adrenaline in my body, like an automatic response that makes everything seem like I’m looking through a camera lens to see.
“I…” his eyes drop as he looks at my bed, analyzing the messed up sheets and comforter, “-where is he?”
My eyes widen with horror, my throat feeling incredibly dry as my lips smack open and shut. “I—what? What do–”
“No, where…where is he?” he interrupts.
Baylen rubs a hand over his face, his face scrunching with distaste that has a hint of sadness lingering in the creases of his eyes. My heart pummels in my chest. I swallow the lump in my throat, my eyes feeling dry as the morning breeze stings against my waterline.
“He left, I—I’m sorry, I won’t sneak him around again, just—please don’t tell mom, I—”
My words halt as I watch him stalk closer to me. He sits on the edge of my bed, his arms resting on his knees with his face buried in his hands. I freeze, noticing the subtle shake of his body, a loud sniff echoing through the room as the wind grows silent.
“I–I’m—’m sorry,” he cries, a sob racking through his body as his entire body racks with a devastating vibration.
My face tingles, every slight sensation echoing as I feel the air grow stiff. I sit up. My hand reaches out to his shoulder, lightly laying on him as I frown.
“-’m so fuckin’ sorry, you—I—fuck,” his voice cracks, his sniffs growing louder as I hear him choke on a breath.
Pure instinct rushes over me. I lean forward, wrapping my arms around him as he shakes with loud cries. Baylen grows stiff. His body freezes under my embrace before he turns, pulling his arms around my waist as he places his chin on my shoulder.
Something is horribly wrong. The way he’s clutching onto me tells my body to activate every anxious sensation possible.
“What’s going on? Is this about…what’s…just—talk to me,” I plea, my lip wobbling as another sob from him echoes through the room.
He pulls me impossibly tighter, his tears hot and wet as they seep onto the fabric covering my shoulder. “He…he was filling up your water bottle, I…things just kept—he said you deserved better than me and—-and he’s right.”
My face scrunches as I listen to his broken words. Chris and him had some sort of run-in last night, one that had somehow led to my brother who barely even acknowledges me to sob onto my shoulder.
“Baylen….you’re still my brother, it’s okay, I know our dynamic hasn’t always been the best, but—”
A sharp cry purses through his lips. I wince as he hugs me a bit too tight, the whimper sounding from his mouth making something in my chest sting.
“He’s right. I…you don’t understand, I haven’t—you—he’s not what you think,” he says, his voice strained and getting quieter.
“Chris?” I ask, met with an even louder sob.
“Dad.”
My bones go rigid as I feel my heartbeat stop for a second. Baylen shakily lets go of me, his teary, red eyes staring into mine with a pout tugging on his face.
“He’s…he wasn’t a good person—especially not to you.”
“What?” I ask, the word coming out as more of a breath than an actual question. “Baylen, what’s going on? What…what happened last night? What’re you saying?”
His eyes. They say volumes before he even starts to speak.
Each of his words echo with a piercing pain, a sharp sensation clawing at my chest as I feel my heart shatter.
___
Silence drums through my room. Not a single ounce of sound, not even a noise from moving in my sheets—I hadn’t moved.
If I moved, this might be real, and this can’t be real—it can’t be true.
A knock breaks through the silence. My eyes stay trained on my wall as I see movement and hear the sound of my door creaking open.
“Hey, I—”
Chris.
His voice is impossibly soft. I hear the door close shut, his footsteps trailing until he’s directly in my view.
“Hey.” he repeats, this time more delicately.
Chris sinks onto his knees, kneeling on the floor as I lay on my side. I stare as his hand reaches out, caressing my hair behind my ear. The heat grows in my face.
This is too real.
“Baylen let you in?” I ask numbly. He nods, his thumb caressing over the rim of my ear as I find the lump of emotions building in my chest.
“How are you—”
“No. I…don’t. Please, just–”
The question makes my chest burn, the response rushing off my tongue as I feel my face scrunch with displeasure. The wall in front of me is blocked by his body, my eyes drifting to above his shoulder where my dresser is—the dresser with a picture of the man that made my heart feel like it was being wrung out like a towel.
“I don’t want it to be true. I—I don’t wanna think that he…I…Baylen—he’s not lying, he wouldn’t lie about this, but—I’m gonna be sick,” I mumble, squinting my eyes shut as hot tears begin to leak. The sight of that dumb picture is burning in my mind, the fear of opening my eyes to see his face making my stomach twist with nausea.
The comfort of Chris’ touch disappears. I hear him walk around my room, my eyes peeking open to see him setting the framed picture of my dad face down on my dresser.
A sob rumbles through my chest. Chris rushes over, scooping me into his arms as he cradles me like a baby into his chest.
“Hey, hey…I got you, just—just let it all out, okay? I’m here,” he whispers.
My vision is blurred as I try to open my eyes. Every muscle in my body aches as I look over to my dresser, the once prized picture hidden, the frame barely visible.
My dad’s been dead for a long time. He’s been a memory for years—but that’s dead too now.
All the memories, all the things I thought I knew—they’re all gone.
Everything about him is truly dead.
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