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#half wasted my time on it
ricky-mortis · 3 months
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Curtwen Week Day 5: Disguise
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weenie-kun · 1 year
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it is pretty nuts that once you realize you shouldnt be working the standard fulltime then you can never see it the same fjshf
i want more people to be paid more to work less and have more rest and less pressure and im not kidding. besides it accommodating less abled people everyone should have more time on their hands. i hate greed and money and capitalism
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romanticatheartt · 4 months
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You know why I love Feysand? One of the reasons is because there's a balance between them. In a way they complete each other.
Feyre is all forgiveness, love and a pleaser.
But Rhysand on the other hand is all revenge, hate and never forget.
Whenever he's drowning in hatred for himself, for people who wronged his loved ones, she's there to pull him up and shower him with love, respect and reminding him of goodness.
And whenever she is being too forgiving to the point she's forgetting herself or to put herself first, he's there to bring justice and be a shield for her from the injustice of it all.
That's why this is one of my favorite scene of them:
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He's saying he can't forgive anyone who wronged her. But she remembers the ones who wronged him and notices he doesn't care about himself, his hatred for himself won't allow it.
She's saying he has to forgive at some point. He's there to remind her that maybe it's okay to admit that some people have made her suffer.
It's this back and forth between them. It balances them.
He's always self sacrificing himself to keep his loved ones safe, to make them comfortable, to be a shield. And Feyre came to his life, saw right throw all of them and let him to burden her with some of those duties he put himself up for them.
Sometimes it's a wrong trait but it's never out of malice.
And she is always too forgiving, putting everyone else first, always backing down when some times she needs to back up for herself and she let herself to forget them. But he won't, he will remember, he'll defend her if it's needed and when someone crosses a line, he's there to remind them to back down.
Sometimes she let people take too much from her and it might hurt her in the process. A wrong trait of her.
They're the definition of "I will give my love for the both of us" and "I will give my hatred for the both of us"... does that make sense?
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sandumilfshou · 9 months
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still kind of insane to me that people talk shit about jiang cheng without fully understanding what he has been through so lets just understand what his mental state is like BEFORE canon begins:
born via a dysfunctional marriage to be the sect heir
father doesnt care for him, mother expects too much from him/everything he does is not enough
has his three dogs just kicked out randomly with no notice because of some kid he's never heard of by the father who never gave him love and/or attention
said father then favours this kid more than him, to the point that the entire world basically thinks that this kid is biologically your father's son as well, which causes even more family dysfunction
despite this still learns to love this kid as his unofficial brother
works his absolute hardest but is always second-best because his new shixiong is naturally talented
nobody appreciates the hard work he puts in at being second place despite the fact wwx literally doesnt work hard for it
masks his emotions with anger as a coping mechanism to minimise the amount of hurt he feels
ok great so now lets actually take all of the above and apply this mental wellbeing to canon events FROM HIS PERSPECTIVE (keep in mind this is literally what jc is seeing/experiencing because he DOESNT KNOW what the reader knows):
brother is off being the protagonist and getting in trouble and gets their sisters marriage ruined
comes home from a year away and then almost immediately has to go and be a hostage where brother continues his protagonist behaviour
gets trapped and nearly dies in a cave with a 400-year-old monster, is in charge of finding a way out and making sure everyone else escapes
brother and a guy who maybe hates him get stuck behind in the cave so now jiang cheng has to boost it home ON FOOT, without food, to get manpower to rescue them, which takes a minimum of a few days likely without any food or sleep
no appreciation or thanks for doing that since brother was more heroic and killed the 400-year-old monster
gets scolded by his father for being annoyed by this
parents immediately get into another fight about father loving wwx more than jc
because of the above shenanigans their sect is targeted next
tries to defend brother against being whipped to death and/or having his hand cut off by mother
witnesses his entire sect being burned and murdered
loses both his parents
decides to sacrifice himself to save his brother's life, instead of dying he is tortured and has his golden core melted
on top of his inferiority issues, the ONE THING he was expected to do was be the sect leader for the yunmeng jiang. the sect that no longer exists. he is now a sect leader with no sect and no golden core. no shit he wants to mcfuckin die
miraculously gets a new golden core but loses his brother
immediately plunged into a war and he's only like 17
spends 3 months trying to find his brother only for his brother to show up doing the Forbidden Magic and necromancy which is Super Disrespectful in their culture like holy shit what are you doing
brother refuses to use his sword in favour of the Forbidden Magics and kind of keeps undermining jc's orders as sect leader which makes jc look weak in front of all the other sect leaders when he's actively trying to rebuild their sect and be respected as a leader
fights a war for [handwaves] an amount of time, certainly a few years minimum, while watching his brother descend further into Unhealthy Behaviour but brother refuses to do anything or talk about it
ends up lowkey being a war hero
the other three great sects (of which there are now only four) swear brotherhood, leaving out ONLY ymj/jiang cheng, which, what the Fuck dude
is now a teenager who has lost his parents who now has to rebuild his sect from scratch with fuck all money, supplies, and support
brother, who promised to always be at his side helping, is not helping, and in fact is actively just getting drunk and being a nuisance and STILL REFUSING TO SAY WHY
entire cultivation world starts to turn on his brother who is now looking like a loose cannon bc he has Forbidden Magics that are Terrifyingly Powerful and also it has been proven that he does not give a fuck about jc's opinion since he's constantly doing whatever the fuck he wants
literally out of nowhere said brother decides to piss off everyone, start fights, and then KILL JIN GUARDS at a camp and MAKE OFF with like fifty people who are part of the family that he just fought a war against and were responsible for slaughtering his family/sect
go to the terrifying haunted mountain where wwx and the wen remnants are and sees that he's essentially starting a new family with a kid and crops, doesn't seem to care that jiang cheng is still trying to keep the ymj afloat and look like they have any strength
brother is still doing Forbidden Magic and refuses to explain why, and now says he'll secede from the ymj so his bad reputation doesn't reflect on jc like he HASNT BEEN DOING THAT THE WHOLE TIME
so now shixiong wants to just abandon jc completely after jc has lost his parents, had to rebuild everything from scratch, while ignoring the promise he's made their whole life? ok fuck you
jc also can't defend him in public because that would turn the ymj into a target and please keep in mind he is a teenager who was expected to do this ONE THING by his parents and he has poured his heart and soul and blood and tears into rebuilding the ymj and they are So Vulnerable Right Now
uhhh what the fuck suddenly wwx kills their sister's husband ?? bro what the FUCK?
everyone rallies to go and attack wwx for this and again jc literally cant do anything about it and refusing to go will just make everyone assume he's on wwx's side and their sect can't afford to be attacked rn
bro what the fuck now THEIR SISTER IS DEAD?????
oh even better now said brother is DEAD
jiang cheng literally has NO ONE LEFT. no friends. no family. no parents, no siblings, everyone he knew growing up is dead. its literally just him and his infant nephew, who by the way, is living with the sect who are the most powerful and also most likely to be super fucking shady so jc has to tread very carefully
so jc spends over a decade raising his nephew ALONE while trying to make ymj powerful and also hunting/killing demonic cultivators that now p much only exist bc his brother invented/popularised the technique
oh yeah and also this whole time the guy who maybe hated his brother is now like EVEN colder and more antagonistic towards jc like it was HIS FAULT that wwx is dead? get fucked lan wangji you didnt even like the guy (or if this is cql/untamed canon: you literally did nothing either so where do you get off on acting like you're better than jc)
over a decade passes and suddenly his dead brother is alive again and causing more problems and acting like the things he did were not major contributors towards jc's entire family and sect dying
More Political Drama Happens and jc has to manage it
suddenly its revealed that the guy he's been co-raising his nephew with is the major villain who caused the entire world to turn on wwx in the first place oh and also it turns out that the fucking miraculous core jc has IS HIS BROTHER'S, WHO NEVER SAID ANYTHING, AND THIS IS THE REASON HE STARTED THE FORBIDDEN MAGICS AND STOPPED HELPING AROUND THE SECT, but he didnt even BOTHER to tell jiang cheng about it
by the way did i mention this was done via an entirely unconsented experimental surgery
and now the brother of the doctor who did the unconsented experimental surgery is ?? mad at jiang cheng about it ???? like he was supposed to KNOW ABOUT THIS when wwx was KEEPING IT FROM HIM ON PURPOSE???
and now theyre all nearly dying in this dumbass temple - and the ONE family member jc still has is literally being threatened with a garotte
oh cool now jc's brother is saying forget the past let's just leave it all behind !!! as though THAT ISNT JC'S ENTIRE LIFE AND TRAUMA and the ONE THING he EVER wanted was for him, wwx, and jyl to be alive and happy, and now wwx is saying just forget it! like FUCK YOU???? does jc truly mean NOTHING???????
oh and now his brother is off gallivanting with the guy who hated him - who it turns out doesn't hate him - and now they're getting married
and jiang cheng is meant to just. pretend all of this never happened and live his life normally. while wwx is out there. being happy and married.
like... if you can read all of this and still treat jc like he's the bad guy, i'm sorry, but you have literally zero empathy. dude had it probably more rough than any of the other main ensemble cast, and i am including jgy in that, because jgy Made His Choices. jc literally just had to let things happen around him helplessly
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feketeribizli · 2 months
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guys... if they said theyll send over the details of the interview but havent yet and its tomorrow and i write an email about it do i look cool and serious or lame and desperate... help help help
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dragonpyre · 3 months
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Still amazed at the person who asked if they could buy my car, didn't show up to the deal, and then asked if they could still buy it at half price.
Sir. S i r
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juniper-clan · 4 months
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Heronstar's on a banger legacy challenge, 5th generation, grinding for the top-notch infant trait, raising a perfectly ideal family, has never been more girlfailure and Slickclaw just set the camp on fire. also the apprentices are fighting. this is world war 3 but there is a sad woman happy in the middle of it and that is all I need
Heronstar spent three hours and 40 KB downloading hairstyle and clothing mods for all her characters she was BUSY
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catgenderyuan · 1 year
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I saw Riddle and Lilia's groovys were finally released and i rushed to draw this
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chai-sweets · 7 months
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A bunch of little Kierans I scribbled while at work
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My favorite part of Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog lol
(More under the cut)
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As a bonus, here's the whole sheet I made for Painter Clarity, as well as the "painting" of dead Sonic XD
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damthosefandoms · 9 months
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if your copy of the lightning thief isn’t held together with scotch tape and a dream, are you really a percy jackson fan?
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ropebuny · 4 months
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the audacity of these old ass men on here. treating my dms as some sort of therapy session. IM NOT READING ALL THAT GET OUT OF MY DMS LMFAOO
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shokupanda · 2 months
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me when time moves forward at a steady pace: how the fuck is it more than halfway through july already. this fuckers rapidly sprinting when im not looking huh
#i have so many things i need to do#before the semester starts again this fall#i need to work on comms. i need to work on a project due the end of the month. i want to do artfight. i want to make art for myself. i want#to do art studies. i want to start an alt drawing more suggestive stuff. i mean what who said that mustve been the wind#and thats just the things related to drawing.#i need to organize my room. i need to learn [redacted]. i want to cook more. i want to socialize more. i want to play games. i want to-#watch and read and listen to so many things#yet i have a finite amount of time to do everything#and half of a day is consumed by me just snoozing#and when i do work on something i feel like im Not Efficient Enough.#i cant just chill in vcs i need to be productive and draw too. and if i dont make significant progress then I Have Failed.#i cant just watch New Season of Show. thats Time Focused on One Singular Activity. gotta do multiple things at once or ill feel bad after#because i know that once the semester starts back up then im gonna be 90% less online#back to the depths of graphic design hell making infographics and powerpoints and brand identities#not having the time to draw anything furry or for myself for several months#anywho its 5am#i should go to sleep#sorry for the ramble im just. only now realizing how little time i have#when i wake up i have to really lock in on drawing and stuff#ive wasted so much time playing a game this past week#if i hadnt played it idve made so much more progress by now and im kicking myself so bad mentally now that im like mostly done w the game#gahhh#anywho yeah sorry for the ramble ill post more soon#sho.scramblin
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chronicpaingirlie · 9 months
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some days/weeks/months/years can just be for rest & recovery !!! you are not obligated to ‘make every day count’ you are a human being who is allowed to take the time you want & need !!!!!!!
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justinegreenpie · 5 months
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... why he sit like this
#in this position his face is extremely 'cartoon cat' shaped.. like the perfectly round cheeks and little#rounded bump of a snout.. big round eyes. etc. stretched over the arm of a chair like a weirdo#cats#It's still Hot Evil Summer time and I have so much to do so am just aimlessly hopping between various projects but not actually#getting anything done. as usual. Also so so so so tired. I almost fell asleep in the middle of the floor like 3 times today lol#Trying to finish some costume photos and also another poll adventure thing. plus I do really want to do a sculpture sometime#I haven't finished one in a while. Hopefully my tiredness is nothing bad.#Maybe I'm anemic again so that's making me tired. Or maybe it's just a Listless phase. not that I'm ever really THAT productive considering#all of the health problems and etc. always holding me back. but still. I'm not usually 'sleep or just stare at a wall literally all day' ty#e unproductive.. at least not for multiple days in a row so. hmm... Sometimes especially in the summer though I will have periods of time#that are listless like that. I am under low level phyiscal stress for months at a time due to summer heat so I guess it makes sense#that would eventually take a toll. I just have SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO DO!!!!! AAUUGhhh#I also came up with a new idea for a game that is so so cool and I wish I could make it but I have to finish the other one first lol#which I will NEVER do. if I spend all day just sleepy unfocused barely able to do anything#I also really need to sell some clothes and sculptures because I'll probably have to buy a new computer soon so I need money. (plus still#recovering the costs of having to euthanize my other cat.. wehh) There's nothing clearly wrong with it right now but it's getting gradually#slower and there's more weird glitches happening randomly and idk.. just weird things that make me think 'hmm... bad.. possibly.'#ANYWAY... I just have so much to do that I both REALLY want or need to do - so it's perpetually frustrating that I just can't for whatever#reason like. Time is always mving forward. every day I waste is a wasted day. The year is already almost half over. I havent finished#any of the projects I wanted to .. and there's only more and more things to do each day. It's overwhelming and stinky#and thats not even considering having to do all of my tasks also with the background noise of economic inequality. everything increasingly#going into an even scarier political direction. active climate change crisis. pandemic that still exists and is insane to act otherwise. et#etc. HOW am I supposed to solo make two whole games . write 3 book series. finish sculptures. do costumes. make outfits. game videos. make#stable network of social connections. do my little side crafts. take care of myself and cats. pay rent. manage health issues. keep a routin#.try to make some sort of money. go to doctors appointments. handle regular maintenance like cleaning and cooking and self care#and buying new plates when old ones break or etc. make sure to do other things like backup my computer data regularly. do shopping lists.#take care of plants. pursue like 6 different academic interests. do the other side side projects I have for fun (like music or carving avoc#ado pits). eat in a healthy way thats okay for my Special Health Issue diet. exercise so i don't die early. etc. etc. etc. AND all while it#82F in my apartment all the time and I have tiny income and also need to move to another country/climate somehow??? lol......#ANYWAY.. ..very frustrated today over my chronic Tired Sleepy.. time for Cat Photos - which cure all of life's ailments lol
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