#having a disability is still not an excuse. and if it's really preventing you from creating art then do something else

[iidsch]

can you imagine if someone said that they are severely depressed and the only way to feel better is to hunt endangered animals for sport? like we would all agree that this person shouldn't do that just because it's the only thing that makes them happy and that maybe they should a. go to therapy and b. find something less harmful, right? well i just saw someone said they use ai art bcs they are disabled and cant draw anymore so-

[rjalker]

Ableist: If you don't do X [having a job, not being homeless, voting, going out to physically protest despite no one wearing masks these days and the general inaccessibility of public spaces and /literal marching/, ect.], you're a bad person. No exceptions.

Physically disabled people: Yeah, a lot of us physically can't do that.

Ableist: Well, this disabled person [who has access to dozens of recourses you can only dream of] did it, so you have no excuse!

aka I'm still not over my mom's husband claiming that it doesn't matter if most homeless people are disabled, because one time he saw (saw, not met) a man with only one arm and no legs in a high-tech powered wheelchair who had a job, so homeless people who claim they can't get a job are just lazy.

he had no answer for why I was somehow magically different from disabled homeless people, because he knows I'm disabled and can neither get a job nor health insurance nor disability SSI because of the nature of my disability and not being born rich enough to be able to pull over 2k out of my pocket on a whim to pay for a psyche eval out of pocket, let alone pay for every test that would be required to ~prove~ that my hypermobility prevents me from standing long enough to do literally any job within walking distance.

no but really with protests, immuno-compromised people have been begging for years at this point for self-proclaimed leftists to wear masks, but everyone fucking refuses. But now abled people want to be holier than thou and say if you don't physically go out to protest it means you don't care, while ignoring the physically disabled people who literally physically cannot do that for any number of reasons, including the fact that every other protester there would be actively threatening your life by refusing to wear a mask to stop you from dying from Covid19.

Edit: Can't believe I forgot ableists' most favorite crime disabled people can commit: not being able to live independently!

[miliamin1]

“What is it now?” Wednesday asks gravely, still standing over her.

“I lied.” Enid answers wetly.

“You’re disabled and pay too much for the college tuition to feel guilt over-”

“I lied to my mom about having a girlfriend.” Enid sniffles.

“...and?” Wednesday tenses for a moment.

“So when I come home for Christmas alone she will restart the ‘Enid isn’t really gay’ agenda.” More tears again so she rubs at her eyes.

“How much did you lie?” Wednesday asks sitting down.

“I- just mentioned last June in a phone call fight that I’m dating a woman to prove a point. Somehow. I don’t know.  I think she got too sick to continue so I didn’t elaborate. And I-” Enid swallows heavily” I might have mentioned going on a date to cut a call short. Or being on a date. Maybe once when you were hearable in the background. Oh god.” She hides her face in hands.

“Only me?”

“Yeah I say it when I’m home, when I’m out I use going to a class excuse-”

Wednesday interrupts her in a contemplative tone “Do you need a perfect partner or a menace to make her regret budding into your dating life?” When Enid looks up at her the goth is looking far into distance, hand loosely over her mouth.

Enid squints at her before shaking her aching head and wincing “I- perfect partner I guess so she would shut up that only being with a man would make me happy. Or something. I don’t want to remember specific-”

“I can do that." 

“What?” Enid mumbles, rubbing her forehead.

“Play a perfect partner.” Wednesday's head turns to stare.

“... what?” Enid repeats faintly, with fingers to her temples.

Wednesday’s voice is casual but her eyes are intense. “I can be an objectively perfect romantic partner. We’re the same age, I’m attractive, more than able bodied, I have a successful career although I would have to reveal my pen name for that but even otherwise I’m independently wealthy anyway, well educated and I know etiquette to mask well enough. I can’t do anything about the inescapable impression of inhumanity but with my perfect manners complaining about that while sounding sane isn’t achievable. Then there’s atheism and Mexican heritage which could be problems according to your family. I doubt I can pass off as religious but if anyone asks I can just start speaking fluent French and talk about my European immigrant mother. Depends on how racist your family is.”

Pressing with fingers onto the head to make it work didn't help. She's been holding her breath too. “Wens- what- wait.”

“You stopped crying. Good.”

“You were joking to make me stop crying?”

“No. My offer is serious. As long as you won’t cry at me about it again.” Wednesday raises an eyebrow momentarily.

-----

Hi, may I interest you in a pretend relationship Christmas fic a month after? Just don't expect them to actually respect christianity.

Christmas Eve(L) (24096 words) by miliamin Chapters: 6/? Fandom: Wednesday (TV 2022) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Wednesday Addams/Enid Sinclair Characters: Wednesday Addams, Enid Sinclair, Enid Sinclair's Brothers, Esther Sinclair (Wednesday), Murray Sinclair Additional Tags: Fake/Pretend Relationship, Christmas Fluff, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst, Oblivious Enid Sinclair, Bisexual Enid Sinclair, Autistic Wednesday Addams, Enid Sinclair Has ADHD Summary: Lying for months about having a girlfriend so that her mother will stop her biphobic comments is close to blowing up in Enid’s face as she's about to leave for her Christmas break alone. But her hot, spooky roommate really loathes her tears so a plan to prevent her from admitting to lying is formed.

[flatoutin-eaurouge]

Clotted blood and Damp Tears

Part 1 of Loneliness and Disputes

Pairing: Mika Häkkinen x Michael Schumacher

(X)

The first time it happened Mika was out of his mind with fear. It was as if he was reliving his crash and the very graphic aftermath of it.

Everywhere he looked was blood. On the rug, on the bathroom tiles, on his pyjamas. It could be any moment now that Dr. Watkins would rush in to re-open the barely healed incision in his throat to push another breathing tube in, to prevent him from drowning in his own blood. It had happened a few times more the last week, but Mika would never get used to it. He lifted his head from the toilet bowl and stared at the crimson blood coating the porcelain inside. The shock still visible in his eyes and the tears still wet on his cheeks. Perkele!

He had quietly shuffled to the toilet on his still wobbly legs, because he didn't want to wake Michael whom had dozed off in his visitor's chair. And now here he was. Sitting on the floor, his head in his hands and a fine sheen of shimmering blood coating his lips. He didn't want this anymore. It was as if his injured body was posessed by a demon, who took great joy in torturing him. Throwing up your own blood was something Mika had only seen in horror movies. He had no idea if the reason he had been throwing up was because his body wanted to get rid off the clotted blood inside of him or that his ongoing migraines had caused the nausea.

Mika cradled his arms around his aching body and stared into the void while his tears left damp trails on his cheeks. He barely remembered that Michael came to visit him in the evening. He was so astonished that his rival cared enough about him to pay him a visit, but at the same Mika had barely been able to keep his eyes open, consumed by pain and tiredness. And now he regretted that. He wished he would've stayed awake to properly thank Michael. To tell him how much it meant. But he was a disabled loser, that couldn't even keep his tears from rolling down his face.

All of a sudden, there was a knock on the door of the hospital bathroom.

"Mika, are you in there?"

It stayed silent on the other side of the door. Mika knew it was Michael and he didn't want Michael to see him like this. He didn't want to be ridiculed by his childhood rival who was, in contrast to him, actually succesful in F1. Even though Mika knew it was a puncture that had caused his crash, he still felt like a failure in contrast to his peer.

"Mika, are you alright? Do I need to get help?"

"No." Mika wiped his tears with the sleeve of his pyjama top. Although Michael's words sounded sincere, he didn't want him too close. "I am fine, just throwing up some blood. Nothing out of the ordinary." Now didn't that sound ridiculous! Mika thought.

"That doesn't sound good. You should have woken me! Can you open the door?" The knocking increased. "Mika please. I am worried about you."

"Uhm..." Mika tried to look for excuses to have Michael leave the room. Why not just ignore the question and change the subject. "Michael, could you please get me an orange juice from the shop downstairs, for the metallic taste in my mouth?"

Michael didn't reply at first. It was as if he was contemplating kicking the door open to come to Mika's rescue. Mika heard him sigh. "Sure, just don't do anything stupid while I am away!"

After Michael had closed the door of the hospital room, Mika counted to ten before he unlocked the bathroom, to make sure Michael would not return to witness him pathetically limping to his bed. Mika hated the unsteadiness in his legs. His fine motor skills on the left side of his body had really been damaged by the impact of the crash and were healing so irritatingly slowly, although Mika was lucky to be alive.

On his way to the bed Mika limped past his stupid wheelchair. He needed the thing for long trips through the corridors of the hospital. Most of the time when a nurse gestured at his wheelchair it meant something unpleasant was coming up. Often it hinted at a traumatizing test with needles and lots of pain involved.

Coming to a halt at his bed, Mika lifted himself on the mattress with a pained frown. His muscles were shaking and hurting so badly from the movement, and he felt so weak. He quickly started to work on making his face look like he hadn't cried like a toddler. Runnig the fabric of his pyjama shirt over his eyes and cheeks until it hurt.

When Michael returned Mika was sitting upright in his bed, trying to muster a smile. Michael swallowed when he saw the Finn's blood-red teeth. He also noticed Mika's upper lip tremble, as if his rival was trying to hold back his tears. Michael clenched his fists, almost crushing the orange juice box in his hands, as he fought the urge to envelop Mika in his arms. The poor boy had to endure so much at this young age and he was trying to come across as a tough cookie, but Michael knew that inside Mika was hurting really badly.

To be honest Michael felt as broken as the Finn. To celebrate your championship while your childhood rival was in the hospital fighting for his life, had hurt him so badly. Michael had felt sick to the stomach appearing at the start that Sunday afternoon without Mika and his McLaren MP4/10. And now the boy was sitting opposite to him with a trembling upper lip and drops of dried blood on his pyjama top.

He couldn't. He really couldn't bear the sight. From the very first start of their rivalry Michael had a weird soft spot for Mika, a sudden unexplained fondness, that made Michael question himself. Why was this guy making my heart flutter? Even at the time they were both lanky teenagers with mullets, Michael and Mika had an unspoken attraction towards each other. That was exactly why this sight hurt him so much. Mika needed a competive car to battle against him. Not Damon Hill. Only Mika.

Mika was staring into Michael's green orbs, trying to keep up his act of aloofness. He couldn't show weakness to the guy he shared such an intense history with. The Michael. The German had always been an object of his interest. The way he carried himself in the paddock. The image of a rising super star. In contrast, Mika felt like he himself was "just a guy".

Mika looked at Michael again to make sure, he didn't notice the tears pricking behind his eyes. Until he really started to feel his vision blur. Please don't start crying now, you weakling. Mika crumpled the bed sheets in his fists, until he felt two soft hands enveloping his tensed wrists in sudden warmth.

Before he knew what he was doing, Michael untwisted those trembling hands from the bedlinen. "Don't, Mika. Take it easy." His arms snaked around the shaking Finn tightly but gently, to make sure he wouldn't hurt Mika's aching body. "Come here. Don't be so hard on yourself."

Mika gulped in a startle. The welcome warmness feeling very sudden and foreign coming from a source he would never dare have dreamt of. He felt Michael's fingers in his hair, gently caressing his blonde locks. He didn't know what to say. He didn't even notice how his tears started to stream down his cheeks like small waterfalls. Drops falling on the sheets between them.

Michael hushed him, overcome with his own emotions. "Let it all out, Mika. It will feel like a relief." He caressed Mika's back and felt the tremors running down his spine. He bit on his cheek when he realised how ill the Finn actually was. He could feel the weight loss through the thin material of Mika's pyjamas. He could have lost him. It dawned on Michael like a dark thunder cloud, and it caused him to thighten his hold around his rival.

Mika felt the sincere affection, and reveled in it. Quickly embracing the once so foreign gesture as one of the most normal things in the world. His tears started to dry up.

Michael stared into Mika's ocean-blue eyes in fondness and gently caressed the stray tears from his cheeks. "Now that you let them all out, you need to relax". He guided the Finn with a hand on his back to lie down on the mattress.

Mika lied down willingly and squeezed Michael's other hand. "Michael, will you still be here tomorrow morning?"

"Yes, Mika. That's a promise."

[staticespace]

If you receive an ask or see a post for medical assistance by Tumblr user lucymkiraa, it is Highly Likely a Scam

Notice. They have admitted to having more than one account, so you may see their PayPal link in more than one place. Report the account in the image below to PayPal:

I became aware of them after they sent me an ask (I unfortunately don't have the image because I believe they've blocked me, removing it before I took a screenshot). In it, they claimed to be Black and disabled, unable to breathe properly, and needing money for medical attention.

When I looked at their account, I saw the following pinned message:

I reverse image searched their profile picture, which produced no duplicate results. However, I still felt unsettled.

Since I received their ask in my inbox, I began messaging them privately. I will note my personal red flags as we go along.

(this gets long, so please keep reading to view more)

🚩Excessive use of "dear"

Please note, as you see in the pinned message I've shared up above, that they have listed their income goal and the amount they presumably have. This information is completely based on their own metrics and you have no third-party method of knowing how much they actually have.

🚩"Trust me, bro, I will tell you how much I have."

🚩Constant misspelling/misunderstanding of English

Note: they do actually have the update on the account they've messaged me with, even if they have multiple accounts. Regardless, my question still stands, as any of these "other accounts" they have could list any other number or no number at all.

🚩No list of accounts they are using to raise money

Before I could continue, they quickly sent another message.

🚩🚩🚩Lying to agree with me + continued excessive use of "dear"

I intended to say "Moving on" after my message conceding that they did actually have the amounts listed on their account. However, for whatever reason, they agreed with me that they didn't actually say the information I just said they did, indeed, have. Why lie about something so easy to disprove?

At this point, I'm sure I'm working with a scammer, but I also have a tendency to not trust myself. After all, what if their fingers are too stiff to type properly? What if that really is just the way they speak? It's the heat of the moment, and I know I can be gullible and a bit too quick to act.

So, I make one last attempt. After all, it's true that I couldn't find their icon image via a reverse search. But what if they used some sort of overlay I can't see with the naked eye to prevent it from matching with the original?

🚩An excuse instead of an answer

Note: At the time I sent my initial message requesting an answer within two minutes, it was 11:45 PM in Sacramento County, California. In three hours, it would be 2:45 AM.

As noted, two minutes passed without an answer.

🚩Continued misuse/misunderstanding/misspelling of English

Although, I accidentally wrote "be" instead of "been," so that's part of the reason why I didn't immediately consider it a red flag. Continued misuse, etc., is more of a red flag than occasional or one-time issues. Also, since I have put them on a time crunch, their misspellings and such have increased. Ah, also--

🚩🚩🚩Still haven't told me any sort of time

Even if they weren't sure what it would be in three hours, why not tell me what time it is now?

🚩🚩🚩Told me an incorrect time

🚩🚩🚩Continued to tell me an incorrect time, but switched to military/international/24-hour clock

By the time of these messages, it was around 11:53 PM in Sacramento County, CA. The times they told me, as noted, were that it would be 3:44 AM in three hours (it would be 2:53 AM), then they told me it will be 8:53 PM (which is three hours in reverse despite referring to the future).

By this point, I am acting as though it is a scam and reporting their PayPal account. They continue to message me.

🚩🚩🚩Still telling me the wrong time (2 PM when it's almost midnight)

🚩🚩🚩Increased desperation

🚩🚩🚩Continued misuse/misspelling of English despite claiming to be a Black American from Sacramento County, CA (before someone says it, AAVE use would not be a "misuse" of English btw, it's a dialect)

🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩Continued excessive use of "dear"

Unfortunately for them, I hate being called "dear".

I won't bother you with the extra images, but I switched gears and said I would donate to them, and they, continuing to call me "dear," expressed thankfulness. They were so thankful that, when I asked them for the email address they used for their PayPal account, they gave it to me.

As I sent my report to PayPal, they said they hadn't received the money yet, and I said I was heading to the bank. They said okay and gave me their blessings.

Thankfully, for you to send a report to PayPal, all you'll need is their link URL, this very post to show how they've acted suspicious, and their PayPal username, which is Lucymkira.

Their PayPal URL is https://www.paypal.com/donate?hosted_button_id=9R2PJZYZXPG4E.

Remember, Do Not Donate To Them.

I attempted to send a warning not long after our conversation, but I had a feeling that they would block me before I could share it fully.

Here is where I had started:

They appear to have blocked me before I could continue reblogging with more information, so I made this separate post.

TL:DR;

Do not donate any medical expense money to user Lucymkira. Due to various red flags, I firmly believe it is a scam. Do not donate any medical expense money to anyone linking to the PayPal page with the URL "https://www.paypal.com/donate?hosted_button_id=9R2PJZYZXPG4E".

If you click on their link, you can scroll to the bottom to "Report Inappropriate Content" or click the link here, which goes to the same page. Use their username, "Lucymkira", and a link to this post to report your findings to PayPal on their inappropriate behavior and use of their services.

Be careful of medical expense scams on Tumblr, but do not lose your giving heart. Double and triple-check whoever solicits you for help online. Ensure you have enough evidence to believe them trustworthy before giving them anything.

And if they aren't, report them to the necessary authorities so others do not get scammed.

Please reblog this post to spread the word.

Many thanks for your time.

[lucifer-is-a-bag-of-dicks]

there's this nasty little side effect to chronic pain remission, where if the pain does return you get hit in the gut with the Big Sads pretty hard

the thing about managing chronic pain is that you don't get to relax, you have to be so aware of your limits and movements, you have to stay just the right amount of active, you need expensive upkeep and preventative care, you work so hard to stay pain free and even then it's only tentative pain free

so when life throws you a curveball like flooding your neighbourhood and you have to help move and clean up large items of furniture, there's really no way to prepare for that, you can't exactly negotiate with a natural disaster

so you end up crippled and hobbling, can't even unload the fucking dishwasher, and you're hit with that feeling that you've just slid all the way back down to the bottom of the mountain and now you have to crawl back up through the mud

you were so careful, you spent so much time, money, and effort to get to where you were, and now one unexpected, unavoidable event has you back to square one

and I know the climb likely won't be anywhere near as arduous as the first time, because I've put so much effort (and MONEY) into those preventative measures, into strengthening my body so it can bounce back more easily

but it really fucks with your head, being back at the bottom of that mountain, looking up and thinking about that gruelling climb through the mud, because even if you've done a lot to prepare for this, the only previous experience you have was that first awful, terrible, painful, miserable climb, and that's all you can think about

my appetite is fucked, my adhd is rampaging because I can hardly do anything stimulating enough, and family are sympathetic for now but I know from experience that eventually the compassion fatigue sets in, and people expect you to just get on with things, even if the pain hasn't changed, even if you're still barely mobile

the crippling pain is a good enough reason to wish for this flare up to end, but honestly more than anything I don't want to go through having my mother demand household chores from me when I can barely walk, again

it's a special kind of pain, that one, when people you love go from asking if you're okay and making you dinner, to treating you like you just aren't trying hard enough to get better, acting offended that your disability is inconveniencing them now

chronic pain teaches you that sometimes compassion has a time limit

it's been long enough right? surely you're used to it by now? you can't just keep using it as an excuse, go unload the fucking dishwasher

[dipolardruid]

Can I request one with Anell where the reader begins to distance themselves from her feeling that their being too needy since they are constantly by eachother 24/7

I really love your oc's gives me a reason to just start bothering all creators I come across.

Hey, sorry for wait I was waiting for the asks to build up before I dished out anymore but I've got 3 waiting for me so i'll get right to them!

TW: Mention of controlled behaviour towards reader , slight mention of disabling/sabotage of the reader, Unhealthy Relationship.

At first Anell will be confused as to why you're distancing yourself but will chuck it up to you needing a little bit of room to yourself so will leave it be however if you continue distancing yourself more and more now she'll start getting worried.

Especially since you both were glued to the hip since the beginning so she'll feel as if you're losing interest in her which will begin with her closing her store early, calling and messaging you much more so much so that the voicemails after each unaswered call will fillup.

She would try to rush the relationship as a way to pressure you closer to her even prevent you from leaving her, and use less than savoury tactics as a way to help with the rushing process.

If even after all that you still show distance she'll start bringing it up in jokes, she might even give a rare show of passive aggressiveness towards you if it continues on.

Now if you get to a point where she now believes it's a sign of the relationship ending or you possibly being unfaithful she'd now enter a flight, fight or freeze situation where she'll of course choose fight.

She'd sabotage your life completely and utterly, it could range from ruining your reputation to having you get injured in such a way that you have no choice but to be with her and depend solely on her.

On the other hand if you let slip or tell her straight up that you've been like that because you feel as if you're being too clingy and want to put distance between you both as way to not continue bothering her she'll stare at you as if you have two heads.

"I'll be waiting for you tomorrow, don't have me close down my job early to come drag you to it."

Is all she'll say in response suffice to say she'll shut it down not seeing it as a good excuse unless she specifically tells you otherwise.

Now expect to be clinged onto twice as much as you did her and she will hunt you down if you're gone for more than 15 minutes from her.

It would get to a point that you could even lose any relationships you had with anybody else, So unless you want a overprotective girlfriend who could be a whole bodyguard don't try to distance yourself it'll only set you up to be willingly or unwillingly stuck with her even more then before.

Request are open!

[whumpinggrounds]

hi, excuse me, but I've just read your post on overused disability tropes you posted this late February and I thought it'd ask about one part of it- disability superpowers.

now, I don't disagree that superpowers that essentially eliminate the disability of a character aren't exactly great. take Daredevil, for example. in later issues he even gets the ability to discern the color of objects, somehow- which'd give him functionally better vision than my red-green colorblind, near-sighted brother who works as an astronomer! but what about the "opposite" of that idea: powers or abilities that specifically take advantage of certain aspects of a disability to function.

to give an example of what I'm referring to, there's this idea for a character I've been rotating in my mind for fun: there's this guy, I'd say mid-to-late twenties, somewhat hotheaded, lives in what any casual observer in our society would compare to Hell since the heat helps with his chronic pain. Say that, through some space rock falling on the corpse of his long dead ancestor or whatever, he gained the ability to essentially squeeze himself and whatever he's carrying through "cracks", such as the spaces between tiles in a mosaic or the center of the bathroom door from The Shining, and shoot out of another crack not unlike a portal, with one catch: squeezing through a crack pretty much rips apart his everything and builds it back up at the destination (fluids such as stomach acid don't spill out and come right back to where they were beforehand, since this is already a fantastic scenario and the alternative is Not Fun) which as you can imagine is. not exactly comfortable.

say he was still able to use this ability since he'd have higher pain tolerance (and prescription painkillers) compared to an able-bodied person. would that be an iffy concept?

of course, care would be taken to make sure the character part of the character is also good rep. I'd want him to be interesting!

although I should say that I'm able-bodied, and as such i apologize for any details i might've added or failed to add due to this. hope this ask finds you well!

Hi! Sorry I'm getting to you late; took kind of a break from Tumblr and am just getting back.

First thing I'll say is that I do not want to be in the business of telling people what they should or shouldn't write, or what they should or shouldn't read/watch/enjoy. My only goal is to give people tips and more generally, things to think about to help them critically create or consume media.

In terms of superpowers that exist because a person is disabled - I think it's a really cool idea! Disabled people can have abilities that abled people don't; that is a real life thing that does happen. To give one example, simultaneous communication (talking and listening at the same time) is pretty much impossible in spoken language, which is why it doesn't occur in any spoken language that linguists are aware of. In signed languages, this is not true, and information can be both sent and received at the same time. Or real-life Paralympian and double amputee Oscar Pistorius, who was initially prevented from competing in events for nondisabled runners because his prosthetics were thought to give him an unfair advantage. (No one come for me for talking about Pistorius, I'm really only talking about his running ability, not endorsing him as a person.)

As you've described, the trouble with disabled superheroes comes when their superpowers completely cancel out or negate their disability. This renders them both unrealistic representation (not always bad) and excuses writers and creators from having to properly represent the lived experiences of the community they're choosing to tell stories about (pretty bad, in my opinion). So, finally, we approach your question: Is it bad representation to write about a character whose increased pain tolerance, due to chronic pain, allows him to take advantage of a superpower that is extremely painful?

No, I don't think so!

You can stop here :)

I'm going to keep writing though, even though I dragged you through like three unnecessary paragraphs to get to this point.

As someone who has struggled with chronic pain, and knows and loves a lot of people who struggle with chronic pain, I don't think there's anything wrong with the idea. I think the experience of having increased pain tolerance and pain coping mechanisms is actually very realistic for a character with chronic pain! I'm including a few bonus thoughts here, which you can absolutely skip if you don't want to read them, but that might help flesh out the intersection between this character's chronic pain and his power-related pain.

What does each type of pain feel like, and how intense is it? If he's having a bad pain day, is he still able to use his powers? What effect does that much pain have on his mind and body? If he carries others with him, do they feel pain too, and what is their reaction and tolerance to that pain? What kind of coping mechanisms does he use besides having a high pain tolerance, and what does he do when these methods are not effective?

I am linking my own writing about my own chronic pain; feel free to use that as a resource! Or not! Thanks for the question, and happy writing :)

[b-lessings]

We’ve been mutuals for a long time so I remember your occasional mentions about therapy and healing, which actually played a role in prompting me to try and understand my own trauma I was in denial of for a very long time and starting my journey towards getting better I guess. I’m still really struggling with my anxiety, have been for a really long time, sometimes the triggers are too overwhelming and feels like therapy and trauma work only make me understand enough to want to run away again, due to how much my body reacts in social settings, or at the thought of how out of control everything is in my brain. Can I ask, perhaps in vague terms, what was your journey like in the beginning? Does the anxiety ever start to lessen in intensity? Do you ever get to the point where you can process your trauma enough to finally face the reality of it’s remnants in people and places? How long does it take till you begin to seek happiness instead of the vicious internal destruction? How (if at all) does the dynamics of your healing journey change when you let another person you love into your life?

By the end of (reading) this ask I was like ouuff 😮‍💨 that's heavy😅

Salam my dear, I appreciate you sending this ask, I see your courage and your will to get better and get a bit of control over your life, and that's only a sign of strength and bravery, I am proud of you 🤍

Now, I am not sure if I am gonna answer all your points or get carried away by my own thoughts but let me give it a try.

First of all, from personal experience (obviously all my answers will be based on that) I don't think anxiety is something we can totally heal from or get rid of, it is not a feature we can deactivate, and do not take this the wrong way, I will explain later, but with therapy we learn to cope with our anxiety, we learn to make peace with it, and live with it in the most cooperative non-impeding ways.

One of the most memorable sayings that my therapist told me so early on in my journey is that her and my anxiety are both trying to do the same thing: protect me, they are not working against each other, they would actually work together (if my anxiety wouldn't be so stubborn lol).

Anxiety is in simple terms or at a very primal level a reaction to a trigger, you brain detects something that it deems wrong or dangerous and it alerts your body - there is nothing wrong with that. In fact, as human beings we relied on that trigger-response for God knows how many thousands of years to survive and get to this point in history. But then anxiety is perceived as a problem once it becomes a disability, in the sense that it would prevent the person from going on about their day normally.

Now what happened is that I lived like 27 or 28 years of my life not even realizing I had anxiety. I would hear people talk about it all the time and it never clicked, for me not even once that hey that's what I have! Until my therapist said the word. And I was like " anxiety? Me? Noway! I am an extrovert, I have a lot of friends, I am not scared of crowds, I love trying new things and living new experiences blah blah blah" but I had no idea that I had actually been repressing it all in for all those years.

So after the acceptance, the second phase was that anxiety took over my life! I had become fully afraid of everything and I just retrieved to myself. Everything was emphasized. I sorta kinda cut off people and stopped going after things and experiences blah blah .. I remember telling my therapist, since the day I was faced with the diagnosis, seems like anxiety is all that I am! I want to get my old self back, I want to get my life back! Anxiety stole my life! It was painful, it was uncomfortable and it was also my excuse for everything..

But then, one of the biggest turning-points in my therapy journey was when I decided to love my anxiety, and understand it better, understand that it does not want to do me any harm but actually protect me, so I became more aware inward and outward, I became very attentive to the changes and the signs my body gives me, you can catch me whispering " what is it babygirl, what's wrong? " as soon as I feel that stomach ache, lol. I honestly do talk to it, I can proudly say I befriended it and that's how I managed to get on its good sign and take control of my life back.

Now I even anticipate it. I sorta know my triggers, so I can te that I will have an episode, I have learned a few techniques on how to calm myself down or distract my mind, sometimes when it is intense I would allow myself a day off or even an hour off just to myself to do something that brings me comfort, I journal a lot, I analyze my thoughts and whatnot.. and that's what therapy is good for, it equips you with tools to cope with the issue at hand. And yes, that's how it lessens in its intensity like you said. That's how you gain back control over your life. That's how you get closer to feeling and achieving peace, because listen boo, we are not looking for happiness, the goal is actually peace. Happiness is only a moment in time, it's fleeing, it's just an instant. Inner peace and mental peace is what lasts.

I can't tell you how much time it takes because every journey is personal and different, to each of us their path, and relapses do happen, setbacks do happen, after all we are only human, and especially for us girls, the hormonal imbalance is a nightmare and it does affect our psyche.. there is also life events always happening and affecting our mental health.. but the most important part is that you never stop, never give up, you keep walking your path of healing and you keep asking for help! I always say that the keys to having a good experience with therapy are the 3Ps: perseverance, patience and practice!

I have been in therapy for I think 3 years next month, and proudly I can say we don't have the scheduled regular sessions, I do not need them anymore, Alhamdullillah, now it is basically only in cases of emergency like if something really intense happens, other than that, Alhamdullillah I am capable of managing my anxiety attacks, which are neither that frequent not that intense anymore, Alhamdullillah.

P.s. I did not mention trauma because tbh with my therapist we haven't been working on that. And I am well-aware of how sensitive and different our traumatic experiences are, so I chose to sit this one out.

Anyways, I hope I managed to answer your questions or at least bring you some hope! And again, I am very proud of you, I know how gard and tricky it gets but I promise you it gets better, so keep going 🤍

[brownsplodge]

Okay so I really hate when people keep repeating this question right here

One reason for uncanny valley is to stop us fiddling with dead bodies too much, but the reason I’m addressing will be another.

The reason we have the uncanny valley is not from another being: its to avoid illnesses. It’s like a natural version of ‘ableism’ evolutions gives us. It makes us feel scared of people with visible disorders (for example albinos, or people with Down syndrome and such) because it prevents us from having as many kids with hereditary or other harmful illnesses/diseases(being an albino isn’t harmful for you other than possible bullying, but you’ll still be a ‘target’ of the uncanny valley instinct). The fact that uncanny valley exists is actually horrible because it’s a defence mechanism evolution gave us that is mostly useless because very few horribly bad disorders are visible/passed on by people who have them.

Saying that some monster caused us to develop this instinct is blatantly ignoring people with visible disabilities, which are the actual target of this nowadays mostly useless instinct. Its okay (not great though) to feel uncomfy with nearly but not quite ‘normal’ looking people/things, since it’s a basic instinct, but implying that it’s caused by monsters is basically like calling people with visible disorders monsters.

Basically it’s a way to sort out dangerous, but sadly also ‘ugly’ or ‘undesirable’ genes. Obviously uncanny valley changes a little over time because our standards for human changes, and it is an instinct. I understand you can’t always change that. But it is technically a natural form of ableism

A ton of disabilities are also not visible or skip generations, so this gene is like a small security measure anyways

Nobody is aiming at having disabled kids(I hope), but you shouldn’t be scared of people for having ‘a weird face’ (Well you can be, but don’t be ableist, shut in your mouth, its not that hard/lh)

Basically, probably like 80 percent of instincts are explainable. Even one that people dont realise there’s an easy explanation

Educate ur brain before you say ableist shit on accident/srs

Well to be fair it’s such a widespread theory I can’t blame people for assuming that’s it but still.

The fact that so many horror icons/villains look like that is writers and illustrators playing into the natural instinct, to add to the natural fear/hate you get when you see them, it’s not what makes them a monster. I cannot say I’m completely innocent here. I have made characters albino for an added scary factor. But when you do this, why not add some heroes/protagonists with the same features?

An example for a monster that is portrayed like this is Zero, from shotgun boy. He is a monster, and looks like an albino child. What makes him creepy is largely his looks. They amplify his already there creepiness. I don’t find it great tbh. Make some your villain characters the most normal ass white guy with brown hair looking people please/hj

There will be people who make characters that are ‘obviously’ a villain, with these traits as the way you notice(take Draco Malory from Harry Potter: he’s obviously an ass, but the first description you got is supposed to make you feel like he’s a bad guy from a first impression. Draco Malloy is probably an albino, or he heavily resembles one, as he’s very pale and has light blonde hair. It’s trying to make you feel like he’s a bad guy based purely on his looks.)

Consider: What scares us often? Slightly deformed features or ‘too light’ or pasty skin or hair, red eyes, obvious non symmetry, etc… all symptoms of common (visible) disorders or even just common deformities that you might even have yourself.

Sometimes how someone looks can make you feel uncomfortable, but this is not an excuse to assume that anyone who looks close to the ‘average human’ but not quite is a monster.

TL;Dr: Don’t assume that a monster made us develop an uncanny valley instinct, it’s a defence mechanism that makes us avoid visibly disabled/deformed people and is actually a pretty harmful thing.

Sorry, it’s just that the “oooooh there must have been human like monsters that’s why we have uncanny valley” is such a overused and uneducated and unsettlingly ableist comment and I wanted to rant/infodump the real reason for it.

It’s the common sense of not wanting to have disabled kids combined with internet horror enthusiasts that seemingly have no time to think why we could have a seemingly useless instinct.

It’s not quirky, philosophical, a thing to think about or a funny horror prompt. The idea of monsters disguised as humans is fine. But don’t make it an excuse to spread ableist ideas hidden under quirky horror.

[tyrannuspitch]

thor meta directory

hello and welcome, i'm lucian and i've been analysing mcu thor in excruciating detail since march 2022. this directory is intended to help me and anyone else interested to navigate my backlog of thor posts, which were all initially grouped under one umbrella tag.

a few notes:

my main focus is on the asgardian royal family, and my favourite portrayals of them come from 2011-2013. i have a bit of a loki-centric bias, but i do my best to be self-aware. i think all members of the family are terrible people and i love them for it <3

older posts should be taken with a pinch of salt. my opinions have developed a lot since i first started posting, but i've left pretty much everything up for archival purposes.

sometimes my opinions are strong, but they're never personal, even when i express them in hyperbolic ways. i promise i don't really hate you because of a marvel movie :3

to prevent clutter, source, character, relationship and theme tags are only applied to posts that also qualify for a meta or concrit tag.

some of the theme tags overlap a lot, but i'm doing my best.

most of the theme tags don't have an immediately obvious "thesis" post, but hopefully you'll get a sense of them by scrolling through. i'm also happy to answer any questions on this!

at the point when i organised this archive, it contained 1600 posts, so please excuse any tagging mistakes or typos, and let me know so i can fix them :D

finally: my inbox is open and i love talking about thor! comments, questions, suggestions, discussion, and lighthearted/friendly debate are all very welcome :D also, if you send me music associations or fanart, i'll love you forever - i probably haven't seen it, since i hardly follow anyone in this fandom. (just please no th-rki - i'm firmly in the familial relationship camp.)

okay that's all. have fun! 💚💙💜

main tag (completely unfiltered: 1600+ posts, including liveblogging, thinking aloud, silly jokes, complaints, and just about every other thought i've ever had)

by post type:

meta (600+ posts) - meta highlights (100+ posts) - concrit/negativity - text reblogs - fanart - gifs - stills - edits (mine)

by source:

thor 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - avengers 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - loki tv - other mcu - comics - thor: tales of asgard (cartoon) - other marvel - myth + history - fandom - other

by character:

thor - loki - odin - frigga - laufey - hela - malekith - thanos - the other - sif - warriors three - heimdall - valkyrie - jane - erik - sylvie - mobius - kang - avengers - fury

note: tumblr has a link limit! i've had to remove the links to supporting characters' tags to stay within it, but the format is: /tagged/ch:%20laufey, /tagged/ch:%20hela, etc.

by relationship:

thor: frigga - loki - odin - sif - w3 - jane - erik - avengers - fury

loki: frigga - odin - laufey - sif - w3 - thanos - the other - sylvie -mobius - kang - erik - jane - avengers

odin: frigga - laufey - hela - kang - fury - bor

house of odin (for when it's really the entire family at once - not an umbrella tag)

by theme/topic:

abuse + empire - fate + hierarchy - suicide + sacrifice - imprisonment + exile - devotion + treachery - honour + villainy - cycles + scapegoats - manipulation + mind control - order + chaos - war + apocalypse - undeath + afterlife - the threefold death - trickster loki - jester loki - servant prince

childhood + immortality - gender + sexuality - ergi - sorcery - prophecy - disability - ethnicity - godhood - monsterhood - playing the monster - mirrors + masks - eye motif

expressions of love - love as horror - neck/throat motif - grief - codependence - odinsons as twins - redemption - mjolnir - saint thor - thor's sinister side

worldbuilding - modern psychiatry - etymology - mimesis

and finally, my ao3 is here. i'm not as active as i'd like to be, but i'm working on it!

[maniacwatchestheworld]

Hey. Not to be aggro at you or anything because I don't think you mean any harm by it, but you might consider that it's sorta innapropriate to make a cutesy submas headcanons out of the Darius McCollum story. Like it just feels very off to me to take a real life story about a black autistic man being shuffled through the american system before finally being put away indefinately in maximum security lockup and turning it into a story about a couple of white autistic men being rewarded with careers for being good at trains. Like, there is actual human suffering and systemic racism built into that story. Again, not trying to come at you in an accusatory way. Just thought you should consider.

Actually, I completely agree with you! It's why even though I came up with the idea, I have 0 intentions of actually incorporating it into any works nor doing anything with it. If I ever do anything with Emmet and Ingo, I can assure you that this is not their backstory. For me to actually do anything with this idea, I would be unable to mentally leave Darius McCollum out of it and would feel guilty about rewriting his very unique story in such a way. For me to do anything with it would feel like I'd be whitewashing his story and downplaying just how unfortunate his whole situation is and how much the system has genuinely failed him. (From what I know about him, I wholeheartedly believe that Darius McCollum deserves better, and just HATE that the system has been set up to just thoroughly screw him over with no recourse. The solution to this problem is so OBVIOUS and the fact that they DON'T just give him just SOME sort of tangentially train-related job (with conditions, of course) INFURIATES me and really highlights how much this society of ours and the system in which we are forced to exist just hates the poor, the disabled, and the neurodivergent, ESPECIALLY if they are a person of color, and is looking for just ANY excuse to criminalize people and to fuck them over just because they can. It really goes to highlight how our justice system is ONLY interested in punishment, whether the 'criminal' deserves it to not, and not prevention, nor to ensure that crimes don't happen again. Basically, FUCK the police.)

But I still like the idea and thought that it was a funny and wanted to share it. I honestly didn't expect it to get as much attention as it has. I thought that it would maybe get like 20 notes and die out... But now that it's been spreading around and people really do seem to resonate with the idea, I don't want to punish people for not knowing the truly unfortunate situation with Darius McCollum. For myself, I don't think that I'm capable of separating this idea from Darius McCollum, and if I tried to do something with it, details form Darius McCollum's life would inevitably end up leaking in there. But for people who don't know about it, they may be able to create something entirely different and new with the idea that would exist entirely apart from his story. And if that inspires people and they do something genuinely interesting and unique with it, that would be good! I would like to see that! There are a lot of ways to do, 'serial train hijackers' that would be wholly different from Darius McCollum's story! I don't want to deprive other people of the opportunity to play with the idea, even if I feel that I can't.

Also I will admit that giving Emmet and Ingo a happy ending in this kind of idea is at least in part me expressing my frustration with Darius McCollum's situation and my wishing, wanting, and imagining a better path for him. I think that Darius McCollum should be rewarded, or at the very least not punished for his expertise in trains. I think that the MTA would only benefit from trying to find a way to hire him in some capacity. And I wish that in real life this could have a happy ending. But as it stands that can only happen in fiction. Deep sigh. And besides, it's not like train hijacking is an activity exclusive to Darius McCollum (though admittedly serial train hijacking is pretty unique). The real roots of this whole idea actually lie with Keron Thomas' story. (A while back, I was looking for train facts and Keron Thomas' story came up. I read how a 16 year old kid hijacked/illegally operated a train for several hours without getting caught and immediately thought, "Oh. That's 120% Emmet and Ingo when they were 10 or something!" I only found out that Darius McCollum is a person who exists because much more recently I was trying to figure out Keron Thomas' name.) And everything really seems to have turned out fine for Keron Thomas and his whole situation! So I think that there is a place for harmless train hijacking stories out there that aren't necessarily intrinsically tied to Darius McCollum.

[sonicenvy]

If you have the right to vote and are capable of voting, you have no right to complain about politics if you voluntarily CHOOSE not to vote. Your vote matters, and if it didn't there wouldn't be people trying to disenfranchise you and your fellow citizens.

This goes double btw for people who live in super blue states/cities like mine where it is stupidly easy to vote with many days of early voting in a large quantity of sites, same day voter registration, no-excuse vote by mail, voluntary permanent vote by mail registry and no voter ID laws. Everyone in my state being whiny piss-baby about voting is being dumb and selfish; they make it soooo damn easy to vote in this state my fucking god.

Here are my answers to a bunch of excuses for not voting:

"I don't know enough about the candidates to vote!'' - Google is free. You can google the candidates. Most local newspapers do candidate interviews with all of your local municipal candidates. There are many websites you can visit to see what the platforms and policies of the candidates on your ballot are. Do that. If you don't have access to the internet at home, we have FREE internet at the public library. You don't even have to have a library card to use it. Don't have a device? No worries, you can get guest passes to use library computers.

"I don't know where to vote." -- Go to your local board of elections website and look up your voter information. If you live in a large city, your city has its own BOE site. If you live in a smaller city, village, town or suburb your county has a BOE site you can use. Google that.

"I'm not registered to vote." -- If you are 18+ and a legal citizen of the United States you can register to vote. You can go to your city/county BOE site to find out more about registering to vote (what documents to provide, whether or not your municipality allows same day registration, what the registration deadlines are, etc.) You can also go to sites like vote.org to get the full information.

"Someone is trying to prevent me from voting via intimidation or other methods." -- A. That person is an asshole who is denying you your legal and sacred right. B. Call 1-866-687-8683 which is the national voter protection hotline for help.

"I'm disabled and home bound." -- You can register to vote by mail. Many states now have no-excuse absentee/mail in voting. For those states that do not, being disabled and home bound is typically one of the approved "excuses" for absentee voting. Look up your state's rules on mail ballots.

"I don't like any of the candidates." -- This is why you get involved before elections and in primaries to support local candidates who do share your values. This means helping candidates collect signatures, volunteering to canvas, voting for candidates that you support in primaries, running yourself, etc. Additionally, even if you don't like the big name federal candidates, you should still vote, ESPECIALLY for local offices like city councils, mayors, library boards, school boards, water reclamation, etc. The work these officials do directly effects your community and your life. These are the officials who decide what goes on in your child's school, what goes on in your public library, where public trashcans get placed in your neighborhood, what goes on in your local parks, whether or not intersections in your neighborhood have street lights, whether or not your neighborhood or town invests in cycling infrastructure, etc. Vote in these elections. If there's someone who has been running uncontested for a really long time, you should find out if there are other people interested in running that aren't collecting enough signatures to get on the ballot. Or heck, you can run for these offices. As long as you are a citizen of the United States and of age, you are legally allowed to run for office. If you want more information about how to do that your city/county BOE will have that information. Finally, a candidate is a bus stop, they help you get where you want to go, but are not the end-all be-all. Voting can be harm reduction. Which candidates are less bad? You have a brain and the ability to google things. Use that.

Democracy is verb. It is your sacred right and duty to participate. Voting isn't a one and done, it's something that you have to keep showing up for, every election, every year. Every election changes the landscape of your local and federal politics, and every election matters. So. Get out and Vote. Participate in democracy. People around the world and across time have fought and died for the right to a ballot box, and it is privileged and stupid as fuck of you to surrender that right by choosing not to vote when you have the ability to do so. Throwing your vote in the garbage by choosing not to vote does nothing, complaining on tumblr dot com or the bird site or t1k t0k or wherever does nothing if you are not also voting.

[just-an-average-rock]

A little rant about ageing and ageism under the cut :) 

As a teen afab I’ve always been super exited to get old (since my youngest memories). I can’t understand why other afabs are so sensitive about the topic and fear aging.

I understand it in a cultural point of view “my parents don’t want to age so I don’t want to”, on a media point of view “all the cool people in movies and the internet are young” and a capitalist point of view “anti aging products sell because we make them feel bad about them selves”, but I never truly understood why, it never clicked (luckily). I’m not saying their stupid for caring about that stuff I just don’t understand how you could.

I always saw it as unlocking a new skin in a video game. I couldn’t wait to get wrinkles so that I can see how I most often use my face. I couldn’t stop thinking about all the colours I could dye my hair with out bleaching it. I always thought that sun freckles are super cute and I am super exited to have some all over my body.

I say this because, if we stop thinking about aging as a sickness and something we should prevent, we would unlock so many more opportunities for excitement in older parts of life (which are severely lacking). We would get the feeling that life doesn’t stop at 25 and that we are continuously evolving creatures. No matter what media says. I am a past toddler, a present teenager and a future elderly person and I embrace every iterations of myself and love them. They each have advantages and disadvantages, but at the end of the day I am a accumulation of my experiences when ever they might happen

Aside from the spiritual stuff, I have to ask people: are we really gonna juge the value of somebody an whether or not, they contribute to our economy/entertainment. To enyone who says “they’re a burden on their family cus they can’t work” or “their’s to old to still be trying to be pretty, they should just age gracefully” or “we’re just gonna put them in a retirement home because they serve us no more emotional value and they are sucking up our valuable time” is a no heart asshole. They are literally humans, just as much as a queer person or a poc or eny other marginalized person.

And also on the topic of other marginalized persons, being fucking aegist is a huge disservice to the disabled community because your are using the same excuses that are used against them. I’m not personally disabled, so heads up, but when we look closer at the arguments used against disabled people and old people there are a lot off correlations.

Seeing how our culture is so obsessed with “the true meaning of happiness” it wouldn’t be stupid to stop shitting on half of our lifes just because we have wrinkles and start accepting our fate and making the best of it. But I’m not into self help, so you do you.

[opedguy]

New Zealand Prime Minister Resigns

LOS ANGELES (OnlineColumnist.com), Jan. 19, 2023.--New Zealand Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern, 44, resigned in tears, citing that she no longer had emotionally what it takes to serve as prime minister.  Ardern said “its time,” referring to her final decision to step down after five-and-a-half years, starting her term Oct. 26, 2017 at age 37, the youngest prime minister in New Zealand history. “This has bee the most fulfilling 5 1/2 years of my life, but it has also had its challenges,” Ardern said, citing the Covid-19 global pandemic and the biggest mass shooting in New Zealand history.  Ardern tried to control the narrative for her decision, making it sound like she wasn’t quitting but letting another colleague take the reigns.  “But I’m not leaving because it was hard,” Ardern told the press.  “I’m leaving because with such a privilege comes responsibility—the responsibility to know when you are the right person to lead, and also when you are not,” Ardern said.

Whether admitted to or not, Ardern says she’s no longer emotionally fit to serve, something that doesn’t sit well when you consider she’s only 44-year-of age, in her prime by most standards.  President Joe Biden, 80, has given every hint that he intends to run for a second term in 2024, regardless of his age-related problems.  But in Ardern’s case, she wants to excuse herself, based on the public accepting her excuse that she’s essentially “burned out.”  “I know what this job takes, and I know that I no longer have enough in the tank. To do it justice,” Ardern said.  “It’s that simple,” letting the public know her talking points for resigning..  When it comes to burn-out, it sounds like Ardern didn’t get the kind of help that would have helped her cope with the job stress serving as prime minister.  Ardern thinks the press will speculate about her reason for stepping down” but wanted to control the narrative.

If Ardern’s colleagues in the New Zealand parliament knew in 2017 that she could “burn out” after one term, they probably would have picked a different person to lead the country.  “I am human, politicians are human,” Ardern said.  “We give all that we can for as long as we can.  And then it’s time.  As for me, it’s time,” referring to her own assessment that she can’t take the stress.  When she talks about she knows when it’s time to throw in the towel, it certainly sounds like she’s had a breakdown of some kind, pushing her to end her time in office.  When Ardern accepted her role as prime minister in 2017, she knew that she’s be expected when her term ends to continue to lead the New Zealand government.  Saying she’s human is not an excuse to explain why she says she no longer has enough “in the tank” to serve as prime minister.  It’s really not that simple as Ardern makes it out.

Ardern’s Labour Party will no doubt find a replacement but that still doesn’t answer the question of why a 44-year-old isn’t capable of meeting her responsibility as prime minister.  If Biden’s ready to continue at age 82, you’d think that Ardern could handle another stint as prime minister at age 44.  Ardern has four-year-old daughter with her domestic partner Clarke Gayford.  If her domestic partnership were threatened in any way because of her “responsibility” as prime minister, then the public has a right to know the real reasons behind her decision.  Saying she’s “human” is no excuse for anything because humans step up to challenges, find solutions, deal with problems and complete the task at hand.  No one should accept Ardern’s feeble excuse that she doesn’t have “enough in the tank.”  If she’s depressed, dealing with mental health issues, then the public has a right to know.

If Ardern no longer has the mental capacity to discharge he job as prime minister, she needs to inform the public or let he doctors explain to the press the nature of her disability.  If there’s no disability preventing her from discharging her duties as prime minister then public also has a right to know that.  But Ardern can’t have it both ways:  Giving an excuse for resigning but expecting the press to not ask questions.  Resigning a post of prime minister or president is a big deal.  Decisions aren’t taken lightly by leaders sworn to faithfully discharge duties related to their leadership jobs.  When Ardern says “I am human,” she’s implying that she’s had some kind of breakdown.  Not simply her personal preference to no longer to assume her prime minister responsibility.  So, it’s still unclear the real reason Ardern resigned as prime minister.  In all likelihood, she has stress or mental health issues.

Resigning her post a prime minister, Ardern tried to give some feeble excuses but can’t expect the public to accept he explanation. If she decided she was sick of the job, no longer willing to put in the time, energy and work as prime minister, the public needs to know.  But in her teary-eyed decision to resign, it’s clear that she has emotional issues that prevent her from continuing to do her job.  When she says she’s “human,” she’s trying to tell the public that she’s no longer fit for duty.  Without an explanation from her doctor, the public concludes that she’s no longer interested, by personal preference, of serving as prime minister.  “Arguably they’re the ones that have sacrificed the most out of all our us,” Ardern admitted, when referring to Gayford and her four-year-old daughter.  It’s OK for Ardern to admit she’s done sacrificing for New Zealand and wants to spend private time with her family.

About the Author

John M. Curtis writes politically neutral commentary analyzing spin in national and global news. He’s editor of OnlineColumnist.com and author of Dodging The Bullet and Operation Charisma.

[they-are-a-prolife-autist]

So this is my introduction.

The recent overturning of Roe v Wade has sparked- or rekindled rather - the debate about the morality and necessity of abortion (the medical removal of a human fetus from its mothers uterus.)

I’ve seen and heard many say that it’s absolutely necessary and argue for its protection in the name of children in foster care, children who suffer abuse, children who grow up in poverty, children who will be disabled, and of course… mothers who don’t want children. So I've decided to speak up about my own perspective and experience.

Hi.

I am an autistic (disabled) woman who grew up in poverty. I use they/them pronouns.

I was physically, emotionally and sexually abused as a child, and I am a survivor of incestuous rape. I have six younger brothers and sisters, most of whom were born after my mom began loosing her vision. She’s now a single disabled mother of 7 kids, whom she loves. According to the pro-choice mindset, (and I have been told this to my face,) my life isn’t worth living, and my mother wronged us and herself all by allowing us to exist.

I have been told that abortion would have “saved” me, any of my siblings, or my mom even from a miserable existence. I have been asked "how can we allow families to live in poverty? How can we allow the suffering of disabilities? Don't you want to end suffering like yours? Like your families." <- Besides the manipulative wording of questions like these in regards to abortion, the mindset that abortion would "save" us from our lives as minorities is ableist, classist, frankly sexist, and wrong. My mother is the strongest woman I know; not just because she carried, birthed, and raised 7 neaurodivergent children in a home with a narcissistic man all while gradually going blind, but because she loves each and every one of us, sees the value in all of our lives, and never once considered we would be better off not living for our sake or for hers. I will always be grateful that she knew our value as human beings before we were even born.

I find the concept that my death would have been better than my rape, my disability, or my upbringing as a impoverished child extremely offensive. I deserve better than that. Society deserves better than that. Women deserve better than that. My death would not have been preferable to my abuse or to being poor. I learned that after my first two suicide attempts.

Killing me or my siblings wouldn’t have made my mother safer or more happy, but rather would have deprived the world of 7 beautiful neurodivergent lives that are still worth living. The argument that abortion is necessary to prevent lives like mine and to protect my mom from us rather than our abuser is horrendous.

Abortion is used as the failsafe excuse to remove other options. Who needs free birth birth control when you have abortion? Why advocate for better healthcare for pregnant mothers, more protection from abusers, more resources for poor families when, better sex education, or birth control and sterilization rights when…. We can just cover up the issues with abortion. Abortion doesn’t solve any problems. It doesn’t save lives. It doesn't give women an equal seat at the table. Rather, it furthers our oppression by telling us that the only way we can succeed is to adjust our biology to be more convenient, to wage war on our children so we can have an education. This culture of death and quick fixes is a grotesque bandaid hastily plastered to the bullet wound that is our societies selfishness and lack of compassion for the truly weak and vulnerable.

Using the impoverished, the disabled, the sufferers of abuse, and children in a broken system to justify abortion in the name of lives unworth living? No. You don’t get to use people like me to justify wiping us out before we get to live. Despite my circumstances and the suffering I have experienced, my life is valuable. You really want to help us? Stop advocating for our death and advocate for real lasting change.

Or sure… you can call me a forced birther, call me sexist, throw around slurs and death threats. I will continue believing the right to live is the most important of all human rights. I will continue defending the value of lives like mine, and despising this “cure all” for all the issues that make having a family, or just EXISTING hard for people like me and my mom.

I’m Ashe. Nice to meet you.