#he gets this whole arc about overcoming his trauma and letting his friends in again

[chevaliersnumberoneguy]

I just finished Ward and was inspired by a friend to make a review about it here so uh here is my semi-non formal review of Ward.

So to provide a bit of context I became a Parahumans fan back in 2019 and read alongside it with a veteran Worm fan and it easily became one of my favorite pieces of fiction. After a decent break I began reading Ward on and off again for a little bit (not because of the quality I’m just weird when I dedicate time for reading) and after about 3 years of reading it over work breaks and doing a last hail mary sprint for the final couple arcs I feel as though Ward is an amazing follow up to Worm. I know that may be a hot take since I have heard from a friend that general sentiment on Ward isn’t all that positive, but I found myself enjoying it quite a lot.

Wildbow in my eyes managed to expand upon a lot of things I like about Worm and answered a lot of questions I didn’t think would be answered.

Let’s start with a big thing first. I think overall Victoria was a fantastic pick for the protagonist to follow along for this adventure. Not just because she is overall very well written, but out of all the existing characters Wildbow could’ve picked, Vicky was probably the best one for orchestrating the main message of overcoming trauma and learning to love yourself in Ward. It was very fun and satisfying the overall arc she had in Ward.

Breakthrough as a whole was also full of extremely well written characters with all of them enamouring me with their backstories and character arcs in their own way. I didn’t come to think Chris of all people would become such an interesting “minor” antagonist until the Simurgh reveal.

Overall Wildbow has has gone forth and continued to have shown his great ability to present mysteries or seemingly random moments/information and manage to paint it in a completely different light with a massive reveal later on in the story. Chris is a pretty big example of this with all of his behaviors and relationship to his tinker power being weird at best to making a lot of it make sense in retrospect with the reveal that he was more or less created by the Simurgh to help her out in her grand plan. Another example of this is all of the hype and build up to the reveal of Shardspace and the Cracking as a whole.

Now I’m willing to admit it isn’t perfect with all of the Wildbow moments and pacing at certain parts of the story, but I can really appreciate it for what it is at the end.

The parts that got me loving it the most is the expansion of powers as a whole. I’ve always been a nut for eldritch content and Ward managed to satisfy me with that in dividends when it showed us Shardspace, the Titans, the Agents, the conclusion of Entity cycles and actually giving us a full description for the Entities appearance as well. 

All of the cluster stuff was thoroughly enjoyable as well. I loved every second of Rain and his story that was in the spotlight. Easily provided some of my favorite arcs in all of Ward. It was just so fun to watch him develop as a person as well as watch the dynamic he has with his cluster. Cradle in my opinion stole the show being the antagonist of the group. Everything he did was appalling and I loved it. Whether it was him chopping up people with whips or manipulating people in the dream room it was all great to watch play out.

Also god all of the Titan stuff was amazing as well. From the early preview of it from Dauntless becoming one, to all of the build up to this massive event in the Teacher arcs and finally the beginning of the end when Fume Hood second triggered and started the Cracking off as a whole it was all amazing. Then we get into all of the fun combat with the Titans just showing off how formidable of a threat they are, the reveal that if they win everything is over and that this event may never be over, to all of the exploration of Shardspace it was all so well done and great to watch play out.

Another thing I loved was the Teacher stuff as well. I always knew he was going to play a massive part in Ward ever since his epilouge arc in Worm and boy I wasn’t disappointed (mostly). From the disinformation campaign to the assault on his complex it was all fantastic. The arc as a whole did a great job at planting seeds for what would happen in the future. My only real disappointment about him is how he really didn’t play much of a part during all the Titan stuff, but eh it’s whatever.

I thought the ending as a whole was a satisfying conclusion to the story and tied up a good amount of loose ends while still clearly leaving the door at least ajar for Parahumans 3.

Overall, while not perfect I think Ward as a whole was an amazing follow up to Worm and I look forward to reading Wildbow’s other works.

Anyways thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

[mymoviefaves]

So I was thinking. I think the Genshin Impact fandom (and a lot of fandoms tbh) need to learn that there’s a difference between redemption, and humanization.

Tl;Dr None of the antagonists in Genshin have been redeemed, even if they have backstories and they’re playable.

Spoilers for Genshin, She-Ra, Steven Universe, and AtLA ahead

A complaint I see about some story lines in Genshin is that the game keeps “redeeming” evil characters, and doesn’t just let them be evil, with the exception of La Signora who died before we could get much screen time at all, and will never be playable. But the characters most everyone would call “evil” who are playable, (Childe, Raiden Shogun, and Scaramouche) get quickly redeemed with no consequences for their actions, and are no longer evil characters. And there’s a worry that other evil characters that will be playable are going to get the same treatment.

Here’s my thing, I feel like they will get the same treatment, but none of those characters have been redeemed. At any point. (You could make an argument for Scaramouche but we’ll get there). None of them are even asking for redemption. All of them have been humanized though.

So I feel like the easiest way to do this would be to give examples of redemption and examples of humanization.

Redemption:

The first characters to come to mind are Zuko in AtLA, and Catra in She-Ra.

Zuko did horrible things throughout the first two seasons of AtLA, including a lot of attempted murder/capture, lying, betraying people closest to him, being a general dick even. We know that the reason he’s like this is entirely because of his abusive father, but just having that information doesn’t redeem him as a person. He has to earn that, and he does. He gains the trust of the gang, he shows kindness without expecting anything in return, he throws himself into this fight whole heartedly against the fire nation and the only family/friends he’s ever had aside from his uncle. I feel like I don’t have to go too deep into detail, but you get it right? He actively tries to be a better person and to make good on everyone he’s wronged. The gang and Iroh don’t have to forgive him, but they do, because he earned it. And it’s a “kids” show where forgiveness is kind of a big theme.

It’s a similar situation with Catra in She-Ra. She’s a horrible person. She’s selfish, manipulative, violent, and she tried to destroy the universe for attention. We know why she’s like this, she was horribly abused and manipulated by Shadow Weaver and the Horde. She’s sad, scared, and lonely, but obviously none of this is an excuse or makes her a good person automatically. She doesn’t get a redemption arc until the last season where she sacrifices herself for Glimmer, having absolutely nothing to gain from it. She has to literally become reborn, and much like Zuko she completely devoted herself to fighting the opposite side of this fight she’s been in her whole life because it’s the right thing to do. At no point did she just trauma dump and get the best friends squad and the princesses to immediately forgive her, it took weeks of earning their trust expecting nothing in return. Again, hard work.

Humanization:

I feel like this is where a lot of confusion lies. Especially with the black and white thinking found all over the Internet. “If bad person, than horrible evil monster who kicks puppies” “If good person, than perfect saint of a person has never done anything bad in their life”. That’s just not how reality works, and that’s not how good writing works. If your antagonist is just Satan incarnate, sure that could be interesting to play around, but that has to be the main conflict. Trying to overcome this force of nature.

Great bad guys tend to have interesting motivations, and are fully fleshed out three dimensional characters.

I’ll use a controversial example, but the Diamonds in Steven Universe. They. Are. Not. Good. People. Rebecca Sugar was never trying to make them good people. They do not get redeemed at the end of the show. They do not earn Steven’s or the Gem’s forgiveness. They come to a peaceful solution (because Steven is a pacifist and it’s a kids show) but they’re at no point redeemed.

They are three dimensional though. We find out that all of them are still reeling over the “loss” of Pink, and while their actions have always been hurtful they were always meant to be in best interest for the family. Does that excuse them? No. Impact is always more important than intent, and that’s why they’re the bad guys. At the end of the day and the end of the series, they’re still not welcome in Steven’s life even if they try to be better. The audience can see them as more than just evil cartoon villains, and that makes them interesting as characters, but they’re still bad people.

Another evil antagonist who is humanized and becomes a more interesting and well rounded character, Darth Vader. Stay with me.

Obviously Anakin Skywalker gets “redeemed” at the end of the original trilogy, but it’s obviously very bare bones. It was 1985, and not a great example of a bad guy getting redeemed. However, in the prequels we can see how this literal cartoon villain, dark castle on the side of a volcano, evil character, started as an optimistic, brave, and kind hearted little boy.

Say what you want about the prequels and their writing, but the way they portrayed the downward spiral of Anakin Skywalker was fantastically done if you pay attention and don’t zone out during all the political speeches. We know Darth Vader already, but at the start of the prequels we’re introduced to a literal innocent child. We watch him literally being manipulated and groomed to the dark side by Palpatine, have no outlet to talk through his trauma so the only solution he has is violence, and when he’s at the most scared and desperate he’s ever been, he fully falls into the role of Darth Vader and goes out to murder a bunch of little kids. Little kids the same age and with the same mindset he had at the beginning of the series. Does any of this backstory, trauma, and being a victim of Palpatine’s manipulation make him a good person? No. He’s fucking Darth Vader. He kills babies and tries to drag his own son down the same path as him. It does make him into a more rounded and interesting character though. It makes him human. A terrible human, but still human.

ANYWAY BACK TO GENSHIN IMPACT

Childe, Raiden Shogun, and Scaramouche have all been humanized by the story so far, not redeemed.

Childe is a Fatui harbinger. He actively tried to kill the traveler, and while he felt bad about it (there was a translation error in the English version) tried to kill an entire city of innocent people. He only half heartedly apologized for the attempted murder and just laughed it off. He still doesn’t see what he did as wrong, or anything he does working as a harbinger as wrong. He’s by all standards a bad guy. But, he’s genuinely a kind person. We learn that he’s a loving and sweet big brother who’d do anything for his family. We’re probably going to learn about whatever traumatized the light out of his eyes soon in Fontaine, but he’s never been redeemed of being a murder happy mafia caporegime. He’s still very evil, and probably will be until either he dies trying to save the traveler/Tucer, or realizes that the Fatui are just using him and that taking care of his family is more of a threat than a favor. I have a lot of feelings about this man. But that’s the thing, he’s an interesting, well rounded character even without redemption.

Raiden Shogun has never once apologized or even asked for forgiveness for what she’s done to Inazuma. She doesn’t see her actions as evil, she just sees them as an over correction. She’s barely even able to see her citizens as people because she locked herself away from humanity for 400 years. When we get to know her and her backstory we learn that she has horrible trauma, and everything she’s done has been what she thought was best for Inazuma as a whole. We learn that she’s actually a very kind person who loves sweets and thinks the best solution to a love triangle is everyone dating each other. Does any of this redeem her and make her a good person? No. Very few Inazuma characters forgive her for what she did and the war that came from it. Kokomi is willing to be diplomatic with her, because she knows that’s what’s best for her people, but the second there’s a reason to, her and the rest of the characters effected by Raiden’s actions are ready and willing to throw hands. Will she ever ask for forgiveness or seek redemption? Probably not. But her being more than just the cartoon villain evil robot dictator that the Shogun puppet is, makes her an interesting and well rounded character.

Scaramouche/The Balladeer/Wanderer/Kabukimono/Kunikuzushi/Kuronoshi/Shouki no Kami/Babygirl is the only character so far that I feel like is in his “hey, Zuko here” era. Obviously he’s done plenty of evil things in his life. He murdered several entire families to wipe out a cultural art form because he was petty and hurt. He tried to murder the traveler several times, he helped set the vision hunt decree and war that came from it in motion, oversaw the delusion factory getting even more people killed, tried to become a god, attempting to murder the traveler again and attempting deicide on a toddler. Not to mention, overall, kind of a dick to just about everyone. He even asks “Am I evil?” And Nahida says “Yes.”

Throughout all of 3.1-3.3 we learn his tragic backstory, and how he was lied to and manipulated, and traumatized into going from “sweet and innocent puppet” Kabukimono to the Scaramouche we meet in the beginning of the game. Does any of that abstain him from everything he’s done in the past 400 years? No. But I think where we see the beginnings of a genuine redemption arc is when he decides to help the traveler and Nahida when he has no reason to. The next part of his redemption comes from when he found out the reason everyone he loved died, and the reason he became evil to begin with, was all based on a lie and decided that everyone he’s ever cared about might be saved if he never existed. And of course, after accepting all of his mistakes and the worst most evil parts of himself and still deciding to save the traveler’s life just before getting his vision.

Now, is he a fully redeemed and forgiven character even after all of that? No. Not even after all of that. The traveler is still suspicious of his motives, and doesn’t forgive him for anything. But at the same time, he told them to tell everyone effected by his actions who he is and what he’s done. He’s expecting them to come after him and he’s ready and willing to accept anything coming at him. He’s also been actively being helpful and kind to the rest of the Sumeru cast even when he has nothing to gain from it. Sure, his main reasoning for not hurting people anymore is that he has no reason to, but even if he’d never admit it he’s actively being a better person. He’s still a brat and an asshole to everyone in his life, but that’s just his charm.

Anyway, as far as I’m concerned about future playable antagonists and evil characters (Arlecchino, Dottore, honestly the rest of the Harbingers) I feel like we’re going to get their backstories, and they’ll become fully fleshed out, rounded, humanized characters, but they definitely won’t be redeemed of their evil actions by any means.

[moondragon618]

I really want to talk about c!Prime in Bedrock Bros arc now it's literally one of my favorite arcs

Like c!Tommy during his first trip back to L'manberg with c!Techno seeing the Final Control Room again and immediately getting triggered into a panic attack + a whole crisis about c!Dream and just "Where's Dream where's Dream I need my friend Dream" and "But he cared for me, he cared for me-" like he wasn't literally the one who murdered c!Tommy in there-

And c!Dream's first visit when c!Tommy is just absolutely terrified of him but also like... almost desperate to see him again to the point of practically sabotaging himself. And c!Dream already knowing he was there anyway bc he was creeping around in Logstedshire earlier but like, pretending not to? Maybe putting on that whole concerned act (or maybe not an act) specifically to lull c!Tommy into a false sense of security. Maybe even waiting to see if c!Tommy gives in to the exile conditioning and hands himself over.

"On one hand he tortured me, but on the other hand he was a lovely guy!"

Just the whole vibe of c!Dream's second visit being way more tense, that part where c!Tommy follows c!Dream and Ghostbur outside while invisible and gets close enough to c!Dream that he could reach out and touch him if he wanted. c!Dream looking like he's about to leave before suddenly just going straight to c!Tommy's hidden bunker. "I know Tommy was here, Wilbur." And then just taking the Prime Bell and leaving.

Literally the only thing stopping c!Dream from just taking c!Tommy by force was him not wanting to lose c!Techno's favor (which c!Tommy didn't know about yet btw), and he already knew c!Tommy was there from the start, so what reason does he have to be showing up and searching around other than toying with c!Tommy?

c!Dream during his third visit when it's just him and c!Techno, not so subtly implying that c!Bedrock Bros' alliance is doomed to fail and then being like "As long as I know where Tommy is, which I do, maybe I'll... I might come in here at any point :)"

Like this man is so ready for c!Techno to get tired of c!Tommy so he can swoop in and isolate him again and be like "I'm the only one you can trust, Tommy :) I'm the only one who will never abandon you :)" because he just absolutely cannot stand the idea of not having total control over c!Tommy at all times :)

c!Tommy going back to Old Home Logstedshire to Conquer his Fears, then sneaking back into L'manberg to rebuild his actual old home <333

And holy shit that first actual c!Prime confrontation since c!Tommy escaped exile-

"You- you manipulated me."

"Tommy, I was the only person who visited you, I was the only person who was your friend :)"

c!Tommy finally standing up to c!Dream: "I'm the only one who goes against you. And you know what, Dream? I think you're scared of me."

c!Techno's favor once again being the only thing stopping c!Dream from just taking c!Tommy by force.

"Alright. You live for now, Tommy :)" And for the rest of eternity if he has anything to say about it-

And of course: "You know what, Dream? Dream... go fuck yourself."

Like this arc makes me insane holy shit. c!Tommy trying to have a healing arc and overcome his trauma and exile conditioning and c!Dream just being like "Oh, but I can't just let you go, Tommy :) It was very clever of you to hide with Techno but you know it won't last forever :) C'mon Tommy, don't you wanna come back? We had so much fun together, don't you miss it? :) :) :)" because he definitely didn't get unhealthily attached or anything during exile lmao.

[twiceasmanysunbeams]

HOTCH as the KNIGHT IN SOUR ARMOR

The world is filled with idealists who believe in truth, justice and all that stuff and devote their lives to fighting for it. And then the world keeps letting them down. For them, Being Good Sucks. But rather than giving up on their goals, they replace their shiny armor with a full plate of pure cynicism. These characters realize they live in a dark, cruel and brutal world and choose to fight not because they believe they will truly make a difference, but because it's the right thing to do. And they hate themselves for it.

@gc-appreciationweek

[hasarjunadoneanythingwrong]

heaven's feel is definitely one of nasu's best works, and yeah i don't like it when people dismiss sakushirou as "traumatized damsel in distress who needs to be rescued by the male hero" bc like first of all, just because it has a trope doesn't automatically make it bad. then there's the other fact that shirou saves anyone anyway, regardless of whether they are a romantic interest to him or not. the reason he's able to choose sakura over saving the rest of the world is that he does truly love her, and he rejects his entire self for that. he sacrificed his whole identity for her. also, i think it's very important to mention that (heaven's feel spoilers i guess since you said you haven't played/watched it feel free to not read this part or delete the ask), ultimately shirou isn't the one who breaks through to sakura. rin is. it's her sisterly love that gets sakura to snap out of it. shirou only comes in after to finish the job.

i think also, yeah while nasu uses the trope of "traumatized woman turns evil" a lot, i think, more important than anything, is that they (almost) always overcome their trauma and get happy endings. fsn and CCC are not fate zero. they're not misery porn. not that i'm fully defending nasu here bc he's still very sexist but. yeah

You can spoil me tbh I already spoiled myself before I even entered the fate fandom proper

yeah and that’s exactly the reason I think heavens feel specifically works as well as it does- it ISNT ‘boy rescues girl’ so much as it is a combination of both shirou actually abandoning the ideals that drove him in the previous two routes AND rin finally coming forwards and reuniting with the sister she lost. Ubw was shirou doubling down on his dream despite archer telling him it would fuck him up, but in heaven’s feel he willingly lets go to help one person that he cares for. That’s one of the reasons it’s at the end of the game-it’s a culmination of all three of their arcs as characters.

But more importantly there’s a large focus on the fact Sakura and Rin are sisters, and that’s the final thing that actually ‘saves’ her. Sakura’s torment started when she was removed from her real family so it only makes sense to have it end and her healing begin by her real family reach out to her again. Shirou is really only an accessory to Rin helping Sakura (and it doesn’t come out of nowhere as he was a close friend/her closest friend for several years)

From what I’ve heard heavens feel is less about ‘man saving crazy woman’ so much as it is ‘two people who very dearly love someone who is in pain reach out and help her.’ The major issue is when they try to reuse a concept like dark Sakura and her general deal in something like fgo, but they only have one event, no shirou OR Rin, and she’s been given to a writer who isn’t….known….for their delicacy or basic human decency

it’s the hot evil woman with none of the background and none of the supporting cast that made the original work the way it did, and it certainly doesn’t have the same resolution.

[loquaciousquark]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E111 (Sept. 29, 2020)

@eponymous-rose‘s internet is out tonight, so I’m here late and without coffee! Let’s see how many typos we can fit into an hour and a half episode.

Tonight’s guests: Ashley Williams JOHNSON, oops!! & Liam O’Brien!

We open with Brian in light-up vented sunglasses and Henry at his side, as always. Dani is very excited to be back and has fun-buns in her hair tonight. So cute! Everyone talks about how much they’re Zooming these days for work, and Liam mentions he and Matt & Marisha did a digital cocktail night. He and Dani arrange on camera to have a distanced, masked meetup in the park so Dani can see Liam’s dog again.

No announcements! Tonight, we’re discussin’ episodes 110 and 111.

Starting with the end, Brian jumps right to it by asking how they feel that Molly is alive. Liam 100% thought we’d be back to him, but still wasn’t ready when it happened. Caleb doubted he was alive. Both Liam & Ashley marvel at the numerology that keeps cropping up throughout the show. Brian hates not being able to see it at the same time the show happens live; Ashley was biting her tongue not telling him spoilers. (He doesn’t want to hear spoilers unless Yasha dies so he can be there for Ashley if needed.) Brian says he has a little reality trauma from the night Pike died in the pre-stream game; it was the first time he’d realized how much it affected the players.

Ashley’s realized how much she misses unpacking the game with Brian when they get home. She just has to sit with it until everyone else gets to see it. Brian: “Instead she comes home and I have to fill her in on the Real Housewives of Amarillo, Texas.”

Reunion dinner with Trent! Liam talks about how the way things unfolded with Trent is not at all how he imagined it in his pre-game creation; he’d expected more of a fracas, more of an unexpected clash. “Caleb might have been a different person if he’d run into these people earlier in the story. The M9 changed him before [Trent & co] came back and got to him.” He’d imagined Astrid & Eodwulf to be complicated encounters, but says what Matt’s designed has been even harder than that. A fight on a mountain is one thing, but walking into a room with “what Trent dropped, is impossible to cope with.” It also means that if what Trent said is true, anything Caleb does now is effectively of Trent’s design, even killing him.

He doesn’t think Caleb would have gone anywhere near Trent & co without the M9. “The Mighty Nein--it took a long time--but they cracked Caleb open like a walnut.”

He thinks what Matt has done is much more murky than the simplicity of murder, such as the Briarwood arc. He can’t just exact his revenge now.

Liam says that the tempation to tinker with time is no longer as all-consuming as it was. He might still be tempted if Matt dangles a bunch of carrots in front of him, but he thinks that now it might be better to make sure that that kind of thing doesn’t happen anymore for anyone else (!!!). “It’s still a nugget in his brain and it’s still possible he could be tempted by the drug, but what he wanted in the beginning was entirely selfish, but now that the M9 are involved he owes it to them, to the people of the country, even on the Dynasty side--is so complex that if Caleb were to get that carrot and chase it, he would be risking everything.”

Ashley agrees that most of their choices are no longer black and white. Many of the situations feel more like real life. Liam agrees and says he’ll sometimes make decisions that he’s both really happy with and regrets at the same time. They both look forward to what Matt will reveal in Act 3.

Brian feels it’s tough to gauge how deep they are into what Matt’s planned for the campaign. Liam says that thanks to Matt’s skill, he really doesn’t know what Caleb wants right now.

Ashley agrees, and talks about how she created Yasha to have more to overcome than Pike. She loves what Matt’s doing in terms of allowing each of them to overcome more emotional hurdles than physical ones in this campaign.

Going back to Molly’s grave was very exciting for Ashley since she wasn’t able to be there when he died in the game & wanted to do what she could to honor him. Yasha, however, was very hesitant but knew what needed to be done. She’s not very open with her emotions, but both she & Ashley were stressed. They all could feel the energy in the studio & knew Matt was about to do something mind-blowing. Liam: “You could feel all the dust in the air coalescing around Taliesin.”

Brian trips over Eodwulf. Liam tries to help him find some pronunciation shortcuts. Ashley: “You say it so beautifully.” Brian: “Thank you.” Ashley: “Not you.”

Caleb knows how wickedly intelligent & ambitious Astrid is, and was heartened by the wavering he saw in her at the dinner. However, he can’t trust her until he knows why she’s where she is.

He really feels that if they’d had this dinner 60 episodes ago, Caleb might have tilted back along the evil axis and he would have had to retire the character. He had a playlist entirely for if Caleb turned evil and left the party.

The vision of Zuala was a huge deal for Yasha, even along every other instance she’s had of being mind-controlled, etc. “That’s guilt I think she will always carry with her, but at least she’s starting to forgive herself.” Losing the chains, sprouting wings again--Ashley reiterates that she didn’t know that was even a possibility, she just picked the skeletal wings because they were dope--were huge moments in the character development. Ashley’s glad Beau was there at the moment of the first flight; Ashley thinks of the quotation “Happiness is only beautiful when it’s shared,” and because Yasha tends to keep things very much to herself, having someone there to share it made it more impactful. “That was a cool moment. There’s been a lot of healing for Yasha these last episodes.”d

Ashley also says sometimes in that moment, when all eyes are on you in a one-on-one with Matt, everything goes muffled like Saving Private Ryan. “Wub wub wub.”

Dani feels that the only way she could even have the conversation with Zuala was to let her go in the first place.

Liam thinks one of the things that Yasha & Cad share is that still waters run deep. He loves how much Yasha hangs back sometimes, only to then reveal some new moment like the fighting pit. Apparently Ashley also has a knife collection, and uses that metal side of herself when she wants to let that new side of Yasha show.

Cosplay of the Week: Crystal Armstead (@riyuski on twitter) in a Reani cosplay. Beautiful!

How does Liam feel about the return to Rexxentrum? Very, very complicated. Caleb loves magic and lights up when he sees it, which is wrapped in the Soltryce Academy; he brought folks to the dance hall for the same reason, which was wanting the M9 to see the things that he loved about the city.

Yasha felt the same way about visiting the Chantry of the Dawn. It was a memory of a very traumatic moment (almost killing Beau), but given everything that’s happened between then and now it was cathartic to see again. There’s been a lot of healing in the past few weeks. It also felt like a physical representation of Yasha’s growth, the last time she was controlled against her will like that (or at least, until she was mind-controlled by Vokodo. Ashley sighs, aggrieved.)

Brian: “The tower really feels like a love letter from Caleb to his friends.” Liam: “It is, and a love letter from Liam to his friends.” When he looked at Caleb’s spell list, he remembered how amazing the mansion was in Campaign One and how many role-playing moments it led to and knew he wanted to incorporate it. However, he knew it could never be the same as Scanlan’s mansion because Caleb doesn’t have the same improvisational genius as Scanlan does. Liam has been “tinkering with this machine” for over a year, waiting for the moment to reveal it. He loves that he got a chance to see Jester’s room in time to have her tower room reflect reality. He’d discussed the tower extensively with Dani & Matt. Brian: “Hey! What am I, chopped--what’s the saying?” Ashley: “Chopped cabbage?”

Ashley marvels at the design of the dome. Liam talks about how Caleb knowing Caleb has been abused has been slowly getting better, but he also loves now being able to juxtapose that healing with his innate love of magic and how beautiful he finds it, how he loves to use magic as his artistry. The Soltryce Academy wasn’t “Welcome to DEATH SCHOOL,” it was the Sorbonne. It was amazing, everything he wanted. It was only one bad apple within that recruited him and turned it all bad.

Liam also points out how much it means in real life to be able to express his love and care for his friends in person too.

Ashley talks about how much she loves Yasha’s armor in a meta sense because it’s so cool and useful, and great for her armor class, but struggles with what it represents in game. She might not be able to let it go due to its sheer utility, and she may have to find an in-game reason to justify keeping it.

Ashley segues a moment into talking about her velvet top which apparently has a matching velvet scrunchie. She’s asked to demonstrate the scrunchie and ties her hair up in a way that I have never in my life seen someone do with a scrunchie before, and my hair’s been waist-length most of my life. I watch it again in slow motion. How did she DO that??

Caleb’s been looking for the right time to tell Jester about his past for a long time. She’s a good person and makes him feel like he might be capable of becoming a good person at the end, because that’s how she saw him. Liam knew from Laura that Jester wouldn’t condemn him, but Caleb put it off as long as possible. He also wanted to take the time to make sure Caduceus & Yasha knew the whole story too before they went to dinner with Trent.

Liam was also relieved to get it out, because he could never remember who knew and who didn’t, and now he doesn’t have to track it anymore. “Now we can move forward. Now we can heal wounds, maybe.”

Ashley feels Cad picks up a lot, more than most people realize. Yasha was really affected by Cad’s line: “Patience can be good, but it can lead to apathy.” She really feels it opened her eyes, and she appreciated the simplicity of him pointing out her hair’s growing back white again. Having a friend notice “hey, you’re changing for the better” really means a lot. She’s interested in seeing how this means things might change with Beau.

Dani points out that it also reinforced for Yasha that she can want things too--she can be patient and just continue to be with the group, as she’s wanted, but it’s okay to want more than that too. Ashley remembers Veth asking her what her purpose is. There’s a part of her that knows Yasha is still figuring that out, and she’s interested to see how Yasha will continue to change. She’s always spent her life serving somebody--the Sky Spear, Obann--and then even after she joined the M9, it was very centered on “what do you need, what does the group need, how can I help with our next job?” She’s going to have to take some time to figure out what she wants.

Fanart of the Week! Lovely Yasha & Beau flight art by @JMNP7888. The wings look amazing!

Brian: “One of the things we want to talk to you about, Liam, is about the Vokodo fight and the FUCKING disintegrate spell.”

Liam: “That was one of the most insane 60-90 seconds of gameplay that ever existed for the table, and definitely for me, in the entire history of the show. A lot of people think I just went, oh man, just bet it all on black. But what if I told you that...I Larkin’d the first 20 seconds of that fight and then at a quarter to midnight, I forgot that the reflection was a thing? I just forgot it was a thing! I spent that whole battle thinking I’m just here to banish things. I might buff my friends a little bit, maybe I’ll counterspell, but I’m just here to banish. And it didn’t work and it didn’t work and then it did! Finally it did and Jester made it work and then he was GONE. And then everyone got greedy and it was done but we brought him BACK. And it was a quarter to midnight and I’m not an animatronic D&D lesson machine, I’m just a guy playing D&D at 11:45 at night, and he came back and everyone started Goodfellas circling him and kicking him, and Beau & Yasha are gonna kill him, and then it’s my turn? Disintegrate! And then the room was quiet, and then time passed, and Matt asked, you really cast Disintegrate? And I said yes, of course, and Matt started rolling dice, and in the back of my head I started wondering why he asked if I was rolling Disintegrate. Oh no. In the back of my brain, I was like, well, just tell him that’s not what you did. Tell him you didn’t remember the reflection thing. But he’s already rolling dice! You can’t take it back now. Hold on a second. I’m going to take you on the journey I went through. I was thinking: you have a spell save of 17. This thing wasn’t that fast. +1, +2, maybe? Anything under 14 is okay. That’s 70%. 70%. That’s okay, right? And still no one said anything to tip me off that I was in ELDRITCH MADNESS at that point, no one said anything about the reflection! And then I realize it can reflect back on us, and I realize this is...disintegrate. And then I started becoming morbidly, macabre-ly fascinated at the puppet dance of death I had created. Well, this is a mess. I have made a mess. Let’s just sit in it. And somehow, nonsensically, spectacularly, it worked out in my favor. I went home that night and I got in bed next to my wife, who was fast asleep, and I stared at the ceiling going, dude. Duuuuuuuude. Duuuuuuuuuude.”

He apparently also told his therapist about this and how terrible it was and how close he “danced myself to the precipice like a crazy person!” Marisha (as told by Liam): “Epic roll, though.”

Matt told Liam that night that if it had been reflected, it would have gone back on him. “If a player throws an M80 in the middle of a room, it would reflect on that player who threw it.”

Ashley talks about how interesting that Yasha is not performative, and yet has been doing these public performances with the harp. It’s a great experiment for Ashley--Yasha doesn’t like the attention, but feels like she is making something beautiful for the world.” She’s trying to change something about how she views herself & her place in the world. She was raised to be a weapon for the Sky Spear, but she’s also extremely gentle and loves flowers & beautiful music, and the further away she’s gotten from the tribe, she’s falling in love with gentle, beautiful things. 

Liam also points out it easy (real, but simplistic) to make an entire character centered around a single personality trait: “I’m angry all the time. I’m sad all the time.” He thinks it’s more realistic to see nuance in personality.

Liam can see some paths for Caleb to find peace & do good. He doesn’t know if Caleb is conscious of those. He thinks it’s a huge step forward to admit he was molded in this direction at all and that it wasn’t all his choice, but doesn’t know if this is the same possibility as redemption.

He also mentions Essek in this answer: there was/is attraction there, both intellectual and physical--the forehead kiss was a big marker of that--and he’s interested in seeing where that goes because he’s invested in Essek’s redemption arc on its own, but Essek is not as high on the list as other things Caleb/the M9 need to work on. He loved the “high spy times” of the Essek arc and the tangled-up-ness of feelings getting involved at the same time as intense commitment to duty.

Liam always felt Matt would bring Molly back in some aspect, even though Caleb always demurred because he doesn’t believe in fate. Dani and Brian agree that this is the start of a new act.

Ashley cried at the Vilya reunion. She thought that was an incredible moment and was so glad to see Keyleth. Liam: “Keyleth as part of our story is everything to me. That story is really important to me, so getting just a glimpse of her again was so important to me.” They could all see how that affected Marisha & how special it was to her. Liam: “It was such a great note in her song or color in her painting. She achieved magnificent things and was powerful and great, but had a very heartbreaking and sad ending, so to have this sliver of joy go back in is so complex and beautiful and masterfully done.”

Aaaaaaand that’s all for tonight! Remember, no Critical Role this week. Talks will be back in two weeks. As always, don’t forget to love each other. <3

[fktonofwhatnow]

The Rhys/Tamlin 180 in ACOMAF makes me mad! Like there’s wasted potential there, even if Rhys is endgame. The concept of after the happily ever after is actually pretty cool. There’s real potential in looking at how Tamlin and Feyre deal with the trauma of Amarantha. Having two people realized they’re not right together while still respecting each other is a more adult take than “surprise, Tamlin sux now”, and allows for Feyre to actually make real choices and grow. What's your ACOMAF rewrite?

Damn YALL ARE SPOILING ME WITH THE TAMLIN ASKS ☺️☺️ thank youuu for the ask @havenfable

THIS IS AGREAT POINT TOO WAIT WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT ALLOWING FEYRE TO ACTUALLY MAKE REAL DECISIONS !! YOUR BRAIN !! you guys are spectacular eat a cookie you have earned it 

Ok my thoughts are not quite coherent rn so I’ll try to make sense. I’ve tried writing this like 4 times and every time it just doesn’t work so bear with me here thank you I love you ok here we go. 

Ok I’m gonna start by saying that there is something to be said about Feyre as the narrator and her being an “unreliable” narrator of sorts. The story is about her, told from her perspective. I don’t expect her to have objective views of what happens around her. one thing I found interesting was that she said in conversations with people that she knew Tamlin was struggling, but when we would be listening to her internal monologue, when she thought of him it was mostly to blame him for not knowing she was struggling. (or if he did know, he didn't do anything about it) So like, same thing with the whole thing with Rhysand's mom and sister, we don't know what Tamlin thinks or feels about the situation because he doesn't talk about it and Feyre never asks. (But oh DAMN Sarah should not have given me room to speculate.) Like, UTM broke Feyre right, she tells us that much. Why are we not allowed to believe that it destroyed Tamlin too.

Here we are again, just like with Rhysand's family. I don't blame Feyre for literally needing help, and I do blame Tamlin for not helping her, but to a degree. I hated how the whole situation was handled like Tamlin was shit for not trying to help Feyre (even tho he was, just not in the way she needed), but then Feyre literally not lifting a single finger to try to help Tamlin is ok because he's a man and he can just suck it up and take it. ???? No ? That's not how we handle trauma? Like, my homeboy is fighting a losing battle against this shit and he's the one who's gotta fix everything for Feyre?

But like you said, just a tiny little bit of helpful communication would have done wonders. How about a lil, "hey you ok?" ???? LETS TALK ABOUT IT! Let's talk about how we're falling out of love, let's talk about what Tamlin experienced under the mountain, let's talk about what Feyre experienced under the mountain, let's talk about how maybe we were never good for each other and how we move on with our lives from that! POTENTIAL !! LETS HAVE THEM GROW "Surprise! Tamlin sucks now!" bitch how. Literally how. How did this happen. How did we get here. Tell me. I want to know SJm. Stop being a coward and tell me. You know what, I'll do it for you.

Damn this is about to be super duper long I'm so sorry. 

Alrighty guys once again, I love Tamlin with my whole chest, but I do put a hefty chunk of this on him. From what SJm tells us about Tamlin, he is a fearful individual. His responses to fear are either to freeze or to explode. Both extremes hurt people around him. His actions hurt people, and his lack of action hurts people. Also, for as often as he says the word sorry, he doesn't really show any signs of change or improvement. While I understand that yes , changing your behavior is hard, especially if you're not getting help and don't know how, Tamlin still could have tried a little more, pushed just a little harder, and yes, he could have been better.

But Tamlin is scared. He's scared of things outside of his control, he's scared of change, he's scared of people he loves leaving him or getting hurt. I'm willing to bet he's scared of himself, and rightfully so. He lashes out and it only ever hurts people. I can't believe he's blind to it. When he destroys the study, he's clearly afraid he hurt Feyre.

(i think I’m gonna do my acomaf rewrite headcanons in a different post, every time I try to write them here it doesn’t flow oooof lemme know if thats something you want ahahah I could talk about this shit forever) 

And like, being subject to someone else's fear is stifling. I don't blame Feyre for getting the hell out of there.

BUT AT THE SAME TIME, I know I've said this before: in my opinion, Tamlin has the best depiction of trauma in the whole fucking series. PTSD is a bitch and Tamlin is losing to it. The thing I loathed about acomaf/the beginning of Acowar is how Tamlin isn't given help and then treated like an absolute asshole for it. SJm could have done so much if she had Tamlin learn to ask for help. We can't all just have a Rhysand who knows every thought we have. Sometimes we have to ask for help, as much as we don't want to. That would have done wonders for Tamlin's character arc. And I think that he should have leaned heavily on Lucien for that.

Now look, Lucien deserves a lifetime of free chiropractor visits to relieve the soreness from carrying the entire series solely by himself on his own back. If I'm the one to pay for that for him, so be it. I would do anything for this man.

Lucien deserved so much better than to be bulldozed by the narrative. I refuse to believe that he would let Tamlin use him as a doormat. Lucien deserved to tell Tamlin off on his behavior ok. Lucien deserved a fucking backbone that he had all of acotar and then SJm decided that he was the character who got to suffer for the decisions of every other characters so they didn't have to. Stupid. (At this point I wouldn't be surprised if Rhysand's cum from having sky sex with Feyre fell directly on Luciens face. That's how much SJm likes pummelling him)

Lucien deserves to be strong and tough and emotionally available, especially for Tamlin. I don't think he deserves to be abused by his best friend. I've read fics that make Tamlin like this jackass who's not sad at all that Amarantha forced him to whip his best friend. Are you fucking kidding me. I feel like if Tamlin was going to cling like hell to someone through all of the shit before, during and after UTM, it should be lucien. But no SJm needs us to know Tamlin is a bad guy now. He hurts everyone with no remorse!!! What a villain!!! That was a sin.

Acomaf deserved to be two people talking about how maybe this relationship wasn't going to work out. This book deserved to be Tamlin getting up the courage to as Lucien for help. This book deserved to be Lucien always telling Tamlin that he would be there for him and us getting to watch the two of them overcoming their hardships together. This book deserved to be Feyre choosing her own path, choosing her own family, choosing to live her life as she wanted.

But nah. Rhysand's got a fat cock and uhhh y'all need to like it more than y'all like Tamlin's dick. Also Rhysand is a feminsisist. So suck it.

(If this book was really about giving Feyre a choice, SJm would let her make actual decisions that actually impacted herself and the story instead of just having Rhysand give her two extremes with one of them being obviously the right choice and then tell her whatever she wanted to do was her choice. Feminism.)

Did any of that make any sense. Any at all. No? Yeah I didn't think so anyways I've spent like a week on this I'm tired and I wanted to get it out there. Acomaf was a mess but at least it wasn't Acowar hahahahaha

[arcadialedger]

How Catra and Zuko have been saving me lately: A (sort of) meta

A very long, personal post under the cut. This is really important to me, and I could really use some support, so if you could take the time to read and reblog that would be greatly appreciated. I just want to reach out.

Once again, please PLEASE read. I really need help.

Recently, I’ve found myself desperately latching onto the characters of Zuko and Catra, as many have in the past. To put it simply, I’m in one of the most difficult times of my life right now.

I’m transferring colleges because I was doxed by an online hate mob (long story) , and in general because I just didn’t belong at my old school. I went to three different high schools, moved around a whole bunch, and I don’t really belong anywhere. All of my friends are far away, my parents are busy working and I’m alone.

I just feel like I’m wandering aimlessly in darkness, unloved and unsure where to go. I’m faced with making a huge decision about my future with this transfer, and I’m terrified. Terrified I won’t make the right choice, and terrified it won’t be the newfound happiness I so desperately need it to be. But most of all, I’m terrified of being unwanted and alone again, wherever I go.

I’m used to not being wanted. I’m 4’10, not thin, and have been tossed aside because of my appearance my entire life. I’m 20 years old and haven’t been kissed (how pathetic is that). I moved schools and stayed in my room depressed because I never got to lay down roots and establish a foundation. Hell, I never even got to live as a teenager. I’m just behind and broken.

I was hoping Tumblr would be my place, where I could write and analyze and showcase my talents. Be wanted for once. For a while, it looked like it might be. Then a friend blocked me and made a callout post, due to me having a different opinion on a sensitive matter, and a domino effect began. I lost more friends and half of the fandom we’re both in blocked me seemingly at their word. I had featured this friend on an episode of my podcast at, had many fond memories chatting with them, and even bought a zine to support them. The loss hurt, and I was cut off from one of the few things I had. It was all taken away from me. My growth halted as I dealt with months of online abuse: including death threats, suicide baiting (these people knowing I’ve struggled with being suicidal), aphobic slurs (knowing I’m ace), mocking and editing images of my face. My Twitter was hacked, I lost podcast deals with creatives who my friends who blocked me and started all of this went on to interview because of said hacking, and I was threatened to be doxed. I suffered blow after blow while the people who hurt me grew and were rewarded, allowed a place here, and this continues to this day. The damage remains. I have to self reblog a whole bunch to get my content remotely seen in the algorithm.

Because my entire life, it feels I’ve never been allowed a win. I’ve never been allowed to have and keep anything good. I’m short and ugly, talentless with nothing to give to the world, my family has no money so I haven’t gotten to travel or experience a lot of things. I’ve spent my entire life envious of the “hot skinny girls” who’ve been wanted and dating since high school, who live in McMansions and get to go on vacations.

When I work to make good content on Tumblr and build a following talking about what I’m passionate about? It’s taken from me. When I work hard to get into my old college’s honors program and earn a trip to Greece which I could otherwise never afford, a global pandemic comes along and makes sure I don’t get that kind of positive experience in life.

I’m used to it all, being worn down and unwanted and losing. I’ve gone my entire life behind, lesser, and not enough.

And that’s why I’m so scared. I have a big decision to make, I’m at my own crossroads, and I desperately need all of this to come together for me this year. I’ve gone so long without happiness and love. I need this to be the light at the end of the tunnel, newfound happiness. I need to find newfound happiness. All I want is to escape the darkness, find peace of mind and function day to day doing the things I love without being stressed.

So when I see Zuko— so angry at the world for being given the short stick, abused, and never making things easy, and Catra— driven mad by comparison and feeling as though the world takes away everything from her? Gosh, I feel it so hard.

Because that’s just what I do. I get angry at the world for making things so hard for me. I compare. I feel like the world just takes and takes and never gives me a win. And so I’m never happy. I feel their pain and loneliness so deeply, and I’m terrified that I’m the villain because of it. I cry at the anguish and self loathing in their eyes because I have been there. I AM there. 

Like Zuko comparing to Azula, I feel lesser because the world has constantly told me I am so. I feel cheated and given the short end of the stick, as though life has it out for me. I get angry and lash out from my pain.I’m desperate for validation from people who can never give it to me. I’m so scarred from my past, I can’t believe I have a future. 

Like Catra, I’m always left behind. I’m lonely and driven mad by the unfairness of the world. It takes and takes until I’ve lost it all, but it never gives. I’m so afraid of losing anyone and anything else, I refuse to let anyone in. Because why would I deserve love? There’s nobody who wants me, no purpose for me on this world. I’m nothing, just constantly chasing an impossible goal of perfection to justify my existence. 

“You drive them away, wildcat”

Yeah, I know their hurt. I know what it all feels like. To be that broken, that insecure, that left behind and unwanted. The punching bag of fate. These characters suffering is so much of my own.

And that’s why they’re the only thing to give me hope.

Seeing them be where I am now, and where they end up, I allow myself to believe that maybe, just maybe, that can be my future. That I’ll get a happy ending. It gives me the courage to believe that what I’m so desperately striving for can happen. 

Zuko standing up to his father and forging his own path in life, which leads him to a better place as he finds his destiny and happiness after so many years of torment. We both have scars-- if he can overcome his, why can’t I?

Catra, after so many years of struggle, taking agency over her life back from those to abused her, and finally learning to accept the love of those around her. Opening up to pain and rejection and ultimately being forgiven. Catra felt so lonely, unable to see the love around her-- maybe I’ve been doing the same thing. Maybe I’ll find the strength to take my life into my own hands and find my own love.

It’s so empowering, a flicker of light in what feels like eternal darkness. I am so worn out and broken. I’ve never had love, or learned to love myself. In the real world, it is find to find hope.

It is only in these characters, who have felt my pain and found their way to a better place, that I find comfort.

I am one of so many who have been touched by these characters arcs, and they are one of the purest examples of why stories are important. Why the emotions narrative can evoke are important. It is not only escapism, it opens up a door to critical self introspection that can make a real difference in our lives. It holds up a black mirror of our lives, providing an outside view of our deepest, darkest emotions and struggles which can be so hard to understand when they’re inside. 

These characters, and their stories: insecurity, abuse, doubt, comparison, chasing validation, just wanting to find your purpose in life and happiness-- they are the stories of life, stripped down to it’s rawest emotions. 

There is power in redemption. There is power in rising from the bottom. 

As I said in my last post about Catra and Zuko:

“Their stories: being angry at the world, driven mad by comparison and a need for validation, making wrong choices, processing trauma, needing help but being too scared to open up and accept it, feeling as though they don’t deserve love or forgiveness, fighting to restore and maintain valued relationships, convincing themselves they’ve lost it all, feeling conflicted or confused, realizing what they thought they wanted isn’t fulfilling and hasn’t brought happiness, escaping years of mental conditioning which told them they were worthless, not seeing the love they have right before them, constantly fighting uphill for a life which seems to throw everything it can at them… Well, isn’t that just the most human story of all? And so their redemptions give us hope.”

I have been so lost and lonely for so long, and now I’m at a crossroads. I’m so scared to believe that this change, this new path, can lead to a better place, but these characters? They give me strength to. They give me faith.

This has been a rambling post of feelings, and I am thankful to anyone who has read this far. I’m just so tired of feeling this way, and needed to reach out and share this. If you are also feeling this way, know you are not alone. You are so very far from alone.

I just really don’t want to feel unwanted and unloved, like I don’t belong, anymore. I want to have a place here. I probably sound desperate because I feel that way. I don’t know how else to cry out for help other than sharing this.

 If anyone wants to message or send asks about this, please feel free to do so. I want, and very much need, to talk. 

[denimbex1986]

(Sebastian’s interview plays from from 49.26) 

“It was a wild time because I, I had made like three different audition tapes. I was shooting this tiny movie in Germany and I was making tapes, sending them from there - and, I made a tape for Steve, all, all for Steve, and, and they didn’t say no, they kept giving me notes so I was re-doing them, and then I didn’t hear anything for a while and I was gonna actually go to Romania, where I’m from, after Germany, and instead like, this is where I’m like, I don’t know if, you know, life could’ve gone a very different way had I gone, I don’t know, but instead I, I actually ended up coming back to LA, and then I heard that they were like; ‘Oh, you’re in LA?’ So then, so then I finally went in for like a fourth audition, you know in Sarah’s office, and I did the audition there with her, and then they called me to do a screen test and, which was for Steve, and - and I was like ‘a screen test?’ I had never even - I did one other screen test in my life which was for Star Trek, with JJ Abrams, and it was like - and I, and I obviously did not get that but, but it was like in a, you know it was like in an office with, with, a regular office. I mean this apparently was, we were actually gonna shoot like a scene - you shoot like a whole scene; you put on a costume and everything, you know - I put on this 1940′s like, whatever that suit that Chris has in the, in the movie, in the first Captain America movie, and I, you know you have hair and make-up done, like, it’s like a big tease but you still don’t have the job, you know, it’s crazy. And then you go in there and you’re like, “Oh my God” at the lighting and the camera, and, and I remember doing that, and it was me and like a bunch of other people and, and as soon as I got out of that, like four days later they were like, “You know, it’s not gonna go any further” - you always hear that; “It’s not going any further”, and then, so I was kinda like “Ah fuck after all that..” you know, I was really bummed. And then I got a call saying, “But maybe you shou - maybe we can talk about this character” and, and I never even knew anything about a James ‘Bucky’ Barnes ‘cos what I did like, even for the - I never knew anything about Captain America, I never knew anything about - you know, I never read the comics - so I, and I didn’t wanna read any of it before the audition anyway; there was no script, there was just this scene, and so I really didn’t know anything about Bucky Barnes.”

“Well, so we had that meeting right, like where they, they were like, telling me about James ‘Bucky’ Barnes; again; I don’t have a job. Like, I’m like listening going, ‘Are they - like, this sounds fantastic - but like what, are they just seeing if I’m interested?’ Well yeah, I am interested, like, I wanna be in a movie. But um, they were telling me about his story and they said yeah, and then you know, he becomes The Winter Soldier, he ends up sort of being captured, he falls off this train, he loses an arm, gets recaptured, they they brainwash him, they turn him into this assassin and he comes back, and you know, eventually you know, he comes back around, he gets his memories - like they, they told me the whole story but that was it, there was no more. And then we - and then we were shooting the first movie and, I fall off the train in the movie, and I realised when I went in for a costume fitting, they had given me a costume that was missing the left arm so I was like, ‘*Gasp* Okay that means that they’re - they’re gonna do it’”, you know like - and then, suddenly we were gonna shoot this scene and I had the costume that had both arms and I was like, “Err, why’s not the arm?” and they’re like, “Ah you know what? They just decided that they’ll see if anything - you know, they’d rather have both arms just in case and stuff”, and I was like, “Oh fuck, maybe they’re not gonna do it”, you know? So then I fell off the train in the movie and, the movie comes out, everything’s, you know, cool; 2011, I’m at the premiere of Captain America The First Avenger, and meanwhile like, I’m not, you know, I’m still like, really fighting for a job, like 2011 was one of the hardest years of my life. Like, you know, I was going to this premiere but I, Iike, it was - I needed a job, I was running out of money, like, it was like all this stuff was happening and, and then it wasn’t really until I wanna say like, whenever the San Diego Comic Con in San Diego happened, and a friend of mine called me and said; “Dude, they just - they just, uh, let out the new, uh, title for the sequel and it says ‘Captain America The Winter Soldier.’ in it.” And I was like “What?” That’s how I sort of found out and then a call happened  and we were like, ‘Okay we’re gonna do this sequel’ - that’s how that sort of happened. I mean, I never knew.”

“Well, I mean I think, I think the only thing, uh what’s different is, is the level of experience, right like, I feel I’ve grown so much as a, obviously as a human, you know from experience, but also just as an actor, like how I’m approaching things now is on such an deeper, more specific level than I did ten years ago, you know? I mean, like I’d gone to school and I knew what I was doing and you know, but, but then I think you just learn yourself better, you know, you learn to access yourself in, in different ways, so I feel for me, the work is always deeper now. Like, so I, I guess that sort of changes approaching the character but also the character had - had evolved, you know, cos he’d sort of gone from - through that whole Winter Soldier journey, and then we kind of had him, you know, on these redemption paths like all through Captain America Civil War and into the Infinity War, Endgame stuff. But it was really for me like the, The Winter Soldier movie and the Civil War movie were, were probably the biggest character development moments that he had right? ‘Cos he didn’t really in the - in Endgame and Infinity War; he was there and, and it was still-  it was still travelling towards something, and, and, really the show now - like, this show was the first time we kind of really dove into more things with him, deeply, um, and yeah, I just think, it’s just a life experience to kind of come back to a character, and in a way, you know you add to it. Like, I, I don’t know what filming - I mean it’s not like A Boy’s Life, right, that movie that Ethan Hawke did, but they came back through the years, and there was maturity there and a growth and I, I can’t help but think that to some extent, if I sat down and I watched Captain America First Avenger, and I watched all of the movies with that, this character’s in, including our show, I, I 100% would probably see a character that’s has grown because the actor that’s playing him has, you know?”

“Um, I think we all discussed that we wanted to find a way back for him towards a more stable place, or a better sense of self, you know? He’s gotta own everything he’s experienced; he’s gotta kind of like, The Winter Soldier persona per se is - it’s like a demon that’s a part of him that he’s somehow come to terms with and, and he’s learned how to turn it into a strength, rather than it you know, suddenly like he’s just gonna be cured of this thing because; they are comic book heroes but like, and some more than others, but they all have these emotional complexities to them and, and, and one of the things that I love, like I was lucky with this character, is that he really does have this sort of relatable arc, you know? Um, we’ve all kind of go through - we all have to like face our pasts, we, we’re all haunted by things that have happened to us; trauma, things that we’re trying to like overcome or, you know, people deal with addictions, people deal with - you know so, so there’s all these pieces to that character kind of as he’s like trying to find a better way of life, you know, and fit into the world better - and also give him, give him - give him a new life so to speak, uh, without you know, in, in the shadow of Steve Rogers, you know, and, and exploring how that character now can be in the world, you know, um, and properly function, even for audiences. I think for both of them that was - that was also, uh, another piece.”

“Well I just, but again, like for me like, I knew, I knew this character really well. Uh, like I feel like the preparation that before you start shooting is the most crucial time ever because and, as you know like with you what I’m currently doing, like, it’s just like, you can see, others can’t - yet. Um, it’s insane to try to become someone else or whatev - like, you’re always trying to find ways to relate, you’re always trying to understand; the whole thing is a big sort of study project. Uh, with this character, I mean I was very, yeah I was very protective you know, while we were shooting and there were things that we were trying out, that, that had been tried out on the page that weren’t working, you know, and things that needed to be reshaped you know with us now being kind of like getting into the dialogue - getting in, getting there on set, you know, dynamics, and, and it was great that we had, we were allotted the freedom, Anthony and I, to really take what was on the page and make it our own you know, and kind of bring our own experience from the movies to this, you know? And there were times when I was like, ‘Hey listen, like, he wouldn’t do that or he wouldn’t say that here. He would - he would do this - we haven’t earned this yet.’ You know? I think; I can’t speak for everybody, but you know, for me, I, I wanted to really explore a different side of him. Obviously one that was comedic with Anthony right, the dynamic of what that is, and it really, I started looking at it going like, ‘Oh my God, they’re like the - it’s, it’s the Odd Couple.’ That’s what it is. Like, Anthony’s you know, Walter Matthau and I’m Jack Lemmon, like that or it’s like the other way around. Like, that’s the bickering thing, that’s the comedy, you know and, and Bucky is a guy out of time who’s like an old guy trapped in this body trying to fucking figure out what the hell’s going on. And, and, uh, that’s the comedy - like that’s where; and that’s also where the truth is with him, you know? Um, but I was, I was like always reminding them being like ‘Guys, just remember he was a fucking assassin’, you know; he’s always have this chip on his shoulder you know, to some extent, and, you know - and also he’s really gonna - he is, at the beginning of the season, he’s coming from a very defensive place because his - his sort of big purpose up until that point right, like had been, ‘I know I’m not a perfect individual, right, but I know this guy, my best friend, the guy who’s been by my side since I fucking remember anything, Steve Rogers, is a good man, and I’m gonna do everything I can to try to make sure that guy’s okay, you know, and, and follow his lead’, and, and I know like that was like the, the moral compass; Steve Rogers was his moral compass right, and now you’ve taken that out, so he’s going, it kind of is a little bit like, ‘Well now what do I compare - what do I base myself off of? Like what do I, what’s my target, what’s my purpose, what’s my direction? What’s my sense of, where’s my GPS?’ You know like, it’s a little but like that and, and he’s in a very defensive place at the beginning because he’s - he hasn’t confronted the emotional implications of that yet, and throughout the season obviously he does, you know, but you see that he’s sort of like, instead of confronting, he’s kind of hunting certain questions and fears like further down the road and kind of trying to drive an agenda and, and for a minute, you know, before he actually takes a step back and go, and goes, ‘Wait a minute, what does Sam Wilson really want? Like, who, you know, who is Sam and, and therefore who am I?’ and like ‘What do we really want and what is it really about?’, you know, and so I guess those were all the things we were tackling.”

“I always thought there was a conversation that took place you know, before that scene, that, before the final scene of Avengers Endgame, where you see Steve Rogers much older and there’s a sort of right of passage you know that,  that happens, that I - I always feel thought there was a conversation between him and Bucky before that happened, you know, and in that conversation, where it was like, ‘Bucky, you don’t have to worry anymore. I found my - my peace you know? I’m - I’m, I, I finally got that life I wanted, you know, I took, I’m - I’m taking one for me, you know, and I’m good. Now it’s your turn to go and take one for you, you know? We both served this thing, the shield, this ideal, whatever you wanna call it, like, we’ve done our time - like, let’s find our life like before like, while we still have it’ And, you know, I think Bucky kind of honoured that, and I think, and I think, essentially it was goodbye. It was like, ‘Okay buddy, like, you know, it was a good run, like let’s, good luck and, and let’s go and see what happens’ you know?’ And so I don’t think it’s - does Bucky know where Steve Rogers is? That’s a good question. Um, maybe, maybe not, you know? Uh, I mean I, I don’t even know if I have the answer to that question and I, and I definitely don’t. Yeah, so, so, so I, I treated the season very much like, ‘Alright, this is where it’s at, you know, and how good - I don’t have to, thank God I’m not, I’m not standing over a coffin, you know, I’m, I’m, I’m looking at my friend who’s smiling into the sunset and, and, and being like ‘Yo I had a great life, like, I’m good, you know, so now what is it about? You know what? It’s about the legacy he left behind, you know, I’ll protect that.’ But again, he’s not making it about - Bucky’s not making it about Bucky - he’s again making it about Steve, and of course as you see the season, Sam goes, ‘No, you gotta look at you. You gotta, you gotta make it about you. What do you want?’”

“That was before. And, and it was one of the - episode 5 was like really the first one we were, we were filming. I mean, we all - the whole thing was like a movie; we never broke up the episodes. Like, but that sequence in, at Sam’s house was all at the very beginning of the, of the show, you know, and, and it was crazy because we were shooting a really important scene very quickly, not having had, you know, a lot of the journey yet. That was literally probably day three, you know and, and I that think one of the things that was so wild is, obviously we were shooting the show and then, you know, we were supposed to be the first show out and stuff, and then the pandemic happened; all the tragic events of the pandemic, everything, you know, that was happening in this country, everything we were witnessing, all the way up until this January, you know what I mean? And we were going ‘My God’, like, how, how relevant our show sort of suddenly even became even more you know, because there was a lot of questions that were being asked even before anything had happened.”

“Well yeah, I mean Kevin and I; you know, I, I, yeah, I, I remember having a really good long chat with him before we started you know, just to, just to talk about Bucky and, and kind of like, you know, making sure we were on the same page and everything, and, and I love that. I love talking to him, I mean he’s, he’s like an encyclopedia. You know, I mean there’s just - there’s so much he knows about everything, um, so I, that was my main source, and then, and then Kari and I spent a lot of time talking.”

“Well yeah, I mean. Unless a role requires a certain kind of, whether it’s like gaining weight or losing weight or whatever - I usually, I, for my own, like, I just, the, the workout regimen has just always been part of my life and, and really started with Mar - like, with this character and Marvel ten years ago, you know what I mean, just, is when I really, really - I was trying so hard to get into such good shape around those movies that it just kind of - I mean, I, I don’t go as crazy def-con 5 about it as I do when we’re shooting something or when we’re preparing, but yeah, going back to it, of course. I always try to go back, get really - get into the gym, and, and into the diet specifically like three months before, and um, and it’s a whole process uh, and, but I’ve gotten a little bit more comfortable now, in my, sort of my strengths versus my weak points, you know. Uh, I think like in some - somewhere around the Civil War movie I was just, I was like, ‘I just want to be as massive as I can’ or something, like I was just really - and now I’m kind of more, ‘Okay, I, I know what works for me a little bit better and not’, but yeah, it’s always - especially because of the stunt stuff. And yeah, you know, I, like it’s a, it’s a - it’s a blessing really because, in a lot of ways, you know, I don’t have - Bucky doesn’t have any head covering, anything. Since we started, I’ve managed to do a lot of stunt stuff. Whenever there’s a physical sequence, like we, we always get passes at that, you know what I mean, and it really is on us like how much we wanna be involved or not and I always want to be as involved as possible and it’s been amazing. I mean I think what happens is - when you do it so many times, like I was so obsessed with it on the Civil War I would even go up to the Russos and even if like the camera wasn’t on me, I’d still wanna do it. You know what I’m saying? Like at one time I like pulled my back. Because you can’t - like, if you’re doing that sequence like 30 times, or whatever, like, even like, you’re exhausted, You’re, I don’t care, how, what - you know, maybe a super-trained athlete, whatever, like, they’re training for that fight, right, they’re training for that two hours like for months, but we’re going eight hours a day. Like, I think, even some of the stuff like it’s - I’ve always had a good amount of stuff that I was allowed to do, and that for me is super fun because he’s much more hand-to-hand combat. You know, he’s got his arm; like he can’t fly, he’s not throwing hammers and spiderwebs and stuff like, he’s just, it’s much more hand to hand and, and, and it’s because I wanna be in shape to be able to do that. So for the pandemic, I was running - a lot, and then what I did was, um, I had pull-up bar in my apartment and I was literally running up and down stairways and then I was doing 100 - I was doing 100, 200 push-ups a day, 100 pull-ups a day, 100 sit-ups, 100 squats, like I would just do that over and over again. And yeah, that was the only way.”

“Oh God, that scene is like - you know, those are the scenes that when you read a script you’re like, ‘Oh yes, this is gonna be amazing’, like you’re like, ‘oh I love that, that’s amazing, it’s gonna be like the moment’, and then it starts to be like this iceberg ahead, that you’re like slowly going closer and closer to it. It’s like, ‘Oh God that scene, oh God that scene’s coming up’ - and then you just have it marked on your calendar like, ‘two weeks until -.’ You know, and it’s just - and even up until that point, it’s just always - it’s a scary thing to always be thinking about because you know, you have to go to these places and you have to go there - and um, yeah, we did it, we did it a few times and, it was a good day.”

“Oh my God, absolutely. Absolutely. I mean, just like thinking about it now, with like the whole Chadwick thing is just so crazy. I’m like - with him I was always like really enamored, because I remember on that Civil War movie we met and, and  um, you know, he had come in and, and he new and he - it was sort of like the introduction of his character and I was like, ‘Oh my God, this guy is gonna, he’s blow everyone away.’ You know what I mean? Like it was - there was such, like a commitment and dedication to everything he was doing; it was just so crazy, and we had a lot of these fight sequences and I remember being terrified of going in those scenes with him, um and, and, and we went for it - like we went - we really went for it. ‘Cos I was like, ‘Okay, he’s really showing up, I gotta, I gotta stand tall, I gotta show up’ you know, and then afterwards, we would just do these little fist bumps, you know like, ‘Cool, we’re good.’, you know, like, and then after we shot, you know I spent some time, a little bit, on the press tours and we would be laughing, and it was really cool, and I just, in my head, I would always hope that there was just gonna be more. And so, it’s just crazy to even wrap my mind around the idea of being in any world without him there, you know? I just can’t even imagine it really in my mind, you know, but obviously, I always felt like, I always - in my little scene, you know in my little scene at the end of Black Panther, I was always like ‘Aah, I’m part of the worl - I’m part of that movie.’ I always - I felt, I felt so good, you know, with that little scene and I, and I just loved working with Ryan Coogler, you know on that, he - it was so cool, ‘cos that was, he directed that scene and I remember being there that day, and, and so I kind of got to work with him a little bit, and, and I just, it was a really cool experience. Like, I really, really liked him as a director. And I loved Fruitvale Station; I loved all of his movies, um, I love Creed, I, I - so, so the idea of working with him again in some capacity is really cool and, and you can bet, I’ve, I’ve definitely raised my hand and I’ve said, ‘Hey man, whatever I can do, I’m in.’, but it’s just, it’s gonna be wild to tackle you know any - any of that going forward - I’ve no idea. I could just keep sending - I could, you know what, I should just send him an email once a week just ‘Wakanda.’ But it’s kind of cool, you know like, I love, I, I, again like, I felt really, like, grateful and proud that I was included even with that little scene, ‘cos sometimes, like you know, like I’ve, I’ve told this story before but I don’t know, I, I love telling it, you know, like I was on this airplane one time, and I was flying home, and, and I remember the stewardess came up to me and she gave me - she just handed me this tiny piece of paper and like walked away. And I was like ‘What?’ So, I was like, I don’t know, maybe it was a number, I’ve no idea what - you know, and, and I open it and it just said ‘Wakanda Forever.’ You know and then I like turn around to look down the aisle and she just goes (makes Wakanda symbol). And I was like, ‘Oh my God, okay’, like but it was - so I know, um, I, I love that, that people remember that Bucky’s a part of that in some way, so, you know hopefully, maybe there’ll be more.” 

[not-majestic-bluenicorn]

Cravity’s League of the Universe Theory UPDATE

Season 3 Hideout: Be Our Voice & The Awakening: Written in the Stars

Hello! My name’s Ori and I write k-pop theories and fanfics and today I’m revisiting my Cravity theory cause apparently I didn’t update for Hideout Season 3 even though I thought I had lol This is going to be a mini update since there isn’t much to add, but let’s get right into it.

Arc 1: Hideout Season 3 Main Plot Points

During the prologue of Season 3 we finally get to see more about Woobin, Seongmin and Minhee. At the beginning they hear their names being called by Wonjin, who’s probably using his power to convince them to meet the others. Then we get to see a little of their private lives.

First Woobin is studying in his room when he spots a dead butterfly and revives it. He then tries to take the elevator to leave his apartment building but he ends up getting too scared and gives up; the instagram account also confirms his fear of elevators. He then presumably leaves to spend some time at the arcade. From Minhee, we get to see how carefully he cleans and takes care of his room, making sure even the smallest object is in place, before his alarms sound and he has to get ready to leave. 

[Gif: Woobin picks up a dead butterfly, the scene cuts and we see the butterfly flying again.]

Seongmin is at the bus stop at night, waiting for it. We know from the Instagram posts he doesn’t want to go home so ends up choosing to go to the arcade and he forgets his cellphone. Minhee finds the cellphone and upon touching it discovers Seongmin’s plans and goes to meet him there. At the arcade, Seongmin struggles to play with the dart, but when he closes and opens his eyes again, suddenly he’s nailing every single shot.

[Gif 1: Minhee picks up Seongmin’s cellphone at the bus stop and has a vision of Seonming playing with darts and failing all his shorts.

Gif 2: Seongmin is at the arcade playing darts, he closes his eyes and after he opens them he does a perfect shot.]

Minhee arrives during this and gives Seongmin his cellphone, which is when they notice they both have similar stones. Woobin also notices this and joins them. They notice Seongmin’s injured hands and Woobin heals him, revealing his power to them.

[Screenshot: Woobin standing with his back to the camera. His arm is up as he shows Seongmin and Minhee his stone.

Gif: Woobin grabs Seongmin’s injured hands in his and his hands start to shine as he heals Seongmin. The scene fades to white with the light coming from his hands.]

After a cutscene, we see the other six at their hideout. Wonjin is explaining that Seongmin and Minhee are a year younger than them and that Woobin is his and Hyeongjun’s classmate. He also mentions already calling them and Allen adds that he’s dreamt of them as well. Finally, the three of them arrive and introduce themselves.

[Instagram screenshot: A picture of a table with pictures of Minhee, Seongmin and Woobin sprawled on it. The caption reads “The friends from Allen’s dream that he talked about. Friens that Allen introduced to me. I’m sure they could hear my voice will they? Finally today! #photo taken by Hyeonjun

Screenshot from Epilogue: The nine members sitting around a table in their hideout.]

In the epilogue, they’re all spending time together at the hideout. Wonjin and Taeyoung are talking. Seongmin is repairing something for Hyeongjun. Serim, Jungmo and Minhee are with Revue when Jungmo tests Serim’s power by asking him what is the color of the third cloth in his wardrobe. Serim correctly guesses it’s a purple hoodie. We also confirm Jungmo’s ability to communicate with animals. Finally, Woobin is asking Allen if he can predict which team will win tomorrow’s game, to which Allen responds that’s not how his power works, before they’re interrupted by Seongmin asked to be healed by Woobin.

The scene cuts to them playing a board game. Taeyoung tries to cheat by freezing time but Hyeongjun discovers and stops him. Suddenly, Allen looks up and all the lights around them begin to turn off before they look at the camera and the final light goes out. Then, Allen wakes up to Woobin calling him. Finally, in the Hidden Film we see all but Seongmin and Minhee celebrating their graduation.

[Gif: The members look around as the lamps they were using for light start to turn off on their own.]

What is happening?

Before we update the character profiles let’s talk a little bit about what’s going on. First of all, they’ve finished reuniting and Hideout is over just as we had predicted. This means the stasis stage of the story is over and now we need a trigger. While I think that The Awakening: Written in the Stars is sort of a little break while they work on the next part of the story, because we didn’t get any films or updates on the Instagram account, I also think that the title has more meaning to it than that.

First of all, the simple phrase “the awakening” already feels like a trigger because the word itself alludes to the start of something. I also think it might be literally referencing Allen waking up from the vision he has in the Season 3 Epilogue. Yes, I’m pretty sure the whole last scene is a vision, and while it’s a little different, it does preserve that 4th-wall-breaking aspect we’ve seen in some of his visions before, so it’s not a stretch.

What does this mean for them? Well, simply put, danger is coming, and whether they like it or not, they might have to start learning real soon how to better use their abilities. To be honest, I’m still not sure Starship is gonna go full superhero on them, because most of their powers are very passive, but we’ll see!

Updating the profiles

Now that we know a bit more about our last three characters, let’s summarize what we know and then make a list with their powers.

Minhee

He is an extreme perfectionist, to the point that every single thing must have its place and it seems that he has a very detailed routine to keep order in his room. We can also see that he has quite a lot of alarms that establish the order of his day. He doesn’t seem to have an adverse reaction to disorder though, and simply seems to enjoy the act of keeping his space clean and perfect, because we don’t see him do that with the hideout.

[Instagram screenshot: A picture of a perfectly organized shelf with the caption “Neat and tidy. Finished cleaning up my room.”]

Seongmin

Seongmin hates being home, to the point we don’t even get to see his house in any of the videos. He doesn’t mention it in the videos but he’s pretty verbal about it in the Instagram posts. It is quite likely he has a bad relationship with his parents and he seems to wander around a lot. He is also extremely prone to getting injured apparently. Someone help the lost puppy.

[Instagram screenshot: A picture of Seongmin sitting on a bench at a bus stop with the caption “Not yet... don’t wanna go home like this, should I go there again?”]

Woobin

Woobin lives in an apartment complex and he seems to be a good student. The one thing that definitely stands out about him is his fear of using the elevator. It’s still unknown if it comes from any particular elevator-related trauma or if maybe he has major claustrophobia caused by something that isn’t specifically related to elevators. However, he’s pretty terrified of them and although he’s been trying to overcome it, it hasn’t worked for him at all.

[Instagram screenshot: A picture of Woobin’s hand as he presses the button to call the elevator with the caption “Please, just for today...”]

The powers

Finally, the list:

Serim - People-focused psychometry, he obtains information about others, seemingly by accessing their knowledge and memories. So far his ability has only been seen with the members.

Allen - Precognition through dreams, he has dreams in which he’s able to see the future. All dreams seem to be tied to the members so far.

Jungmo - Animal Telepathy, he’s able to understand and communicate with animals.

Woobin - Accelerated Healing, so far we’ve seen him heal small injuries and bring back to life small creatures.

Wonjin - Telepathy, he can communicate with others through the mind, even if they’re far away. So far his ability has only been seen with the members.

Minhee - Future-focused psychometry, this one is still in doubt since we’ve only seen him use it once, but he seems to be able to see the future of the person who last touched the object.

Hyeongjun - Legit, no idea, what is your deal, child?

Taeyoung - Time stopping, he’s able to completely stop time for everyone else except Hyeongjun. He can continue moving and doing things normally when he does it.

Seongmin - Enhanced accuracy and precision, again this one is still in doubt since we’ve only seen him use it once, but he seems to be able to perfectly nail every shot he makes.

Conclusions

Cravity might actually be in danger, depending on what Allen’s vision meant. One thing is for sure though, the story is starting to move forward. On the other hand, someone help me with Hyeongjun, I accept suggestions.

[steve0discusses]

S5 Ep12: Brand New Mokuba Just Dropped

My tumblr has decided that it can’t save drafts again. Which sure is a problem I keep having but no one else seems to have...but were back. Back and ready to talk about cards.

First off, lets address the best thing about this episode, it’s the return of The A Team animation team! Dunno if it’s the same ones that did the seasons before, but it is a pretty good team this episode, so there’s lots of that to look forward to. Everyone is now 2 feet taller (Kaiba is 4 feet taller) and there’s just some really nice shots going on. It’s not as shiny as other seasons, which makes me think it might be a different team or a different studio using a different method (you don’t really see them playing with line weights anymore which makes it seem like a different method to me) but still--it’s a nicer looking episode today.

So we start off this episode with Seto begging us all to forget the hell that just happened and just get on with it. Of course, no one’s gonna do that, because yo, what just happened was kind of weird.

And because there’s only like...I dunno...maybe 2 episodes left in this arc? (kind of a quick arc, honestly) Leon decides to do a complete personality reversal. Although, it’s really hard to do a reversal when you didn’t have a personality in the first place...so I guess this more Leon showing us A personality--and I’ll take it.

He’s a little jackass now, but it’s youknow...still Leon so it’s not really that bad. Like we deal with Seto on the reg, so I feel like Leon as a jackass is just like...well that’s just how you play cards in this universe.

Everyone speculates whether or not Seto actually did a crime, and a SURPRISING number of them said he did not! Weird! But hey...I’ve gone over a billion times before, their memory is like when you throw popcorn into the ocean--it just fffzt’s and then it’s gone.

Roland was THIS close to actually saving Kaiba corp a huge hassle for once. This Close, Roland. You almost did it.

(read more under the cut)

I love that Roland has decided to give all these teens maybe the uncoolest nicknames in the entire world, and the teens have not made any indication whether they do or do not appreciate their alliteration nicknames.

But despite the fact that although Roland uses these opportunities behind the microphone to embarrass them just SO MUCH, the Kaibas still persist in having him introduce most of the matches. It makes it feel like the Kaibas freakin love this. They love his Dad jokes. I cannot tell if they are like “yes, please embarrass my friends.” of it they’re like “yes. Roland that was so cool. Yeah Leaping Leon. Good one! You’re so cool!” Because they don’t know what fun is.

Also, look what I see in the sky.

Truly a sign that they have overcome their trauma of seasons 2-3.

Or maybe they had a lot of blimps laying around and this is a completely unrelated blimp? Either way, I’m glad they can still handle the sight of a blimp.

And then, just out of nowhere, Mokuba hit puberty.

Which I mean, it was inevitable. It was going to happen some day. Luckily, we will be getting a new Mokuba this episode to make up for the fact that this one has done A Flirt and it was probably a completely innocent turn of phrase he has no idea is a double entendre but do the writers know that?

And while we ruminate the decisions there, lets bask in the glory of purple staircase.

This is such a purple staircase!

On another, identical staircase walks Leon, who gets to have a discussion with Zigfried, who probably just stood next to the wall and just chameleon’ed in here without getting caught cuz coincidentally this staircase dresses like him.

Freakin Mai?

Anyway, lets start this duel where like...I dunno, it’s a little late to start stealing souls, but maybe Leon will do a stab? (He will not)

So glad the storyboarder is back to kind of flex. I don’t normally see Roland drawn with this much attention. Look at him go. That’s the stance a grown man takes when he’s ready to embarrass a bunch of teens.

Kaiba writes a speech introducing himself, or Roland just kinda made up a speech as if Kaiba hadn’t asked him to do that. Either way it’s kind of a big way to talk yourself up--but he is trying to talk up the theme park so people will actually like...go. So it makes sense.

Also what is this nonsense where people worldwide are watching a theme park opening match? Card culture is so weird because we’ve noticed in other seasons there are people that don’t play cards, and I feel like they’re not watching this for fun. It’s like when I watch news unfold--they’re watching to see if they have to raid the toilet paper aisle and the canned goods again to prepare for yet another onslaught of card nonsense.

Legit Mokuba was like “Look at my bro. Look at how he gave up dueling to throw this nice tourney for everyone!” and it’s like...Mokuba...he just dueled...Mokuba...he’s putting all the profits directly in your pockets this is hardly a martyr up here.

Seto Kaiba decided to inform the world that he would have won if he was actually playing and that was sure a statement he made after losing to Yugi like...3 times now? Several times.

Everyone else converses how Leon’s acting weird. I don’t know why they care all of a sudden, because no one acts normal playing this game, but the plot desires them to care.

Which is when we find out...

...the new Mokuba...

That’s right. He was a Mokuba the whole time. For once we haven’t abducted Mokuba, instead...we have too many Mokubas.

This Mokuba even has hella long hair, too. I imagine if Mokuba proper had a ponytail it would probably look just like this but black. It would have been just--so good if he whipped off that ribbon and shook out his hair and it fluffed into a horrible Mokuba mess, but you know, that’s one of the many reasons why I don’t write for this series. That and I was like in high School when this came out.

(Please admire Kaiba’s head of Security who looks like he’s about to drop a poop out of terror. It’s a really small detail, but I appreciate that the storyboarder had him kind of antsy in the background)

Seto insists that the only one to beat Yugi Muto will be himself and it’s like...I know. That’s why I keep expecting someone to get stabbed by this tiny purple haired Mokuba. But instead, Leon’s too busy feeling mad that he’s not necessarily playing the game for fun.

But he’s still playing the game though? so I feel like Yami doesn’t have many stones to throw here. Leon hasn’t even cheated yet. (As if Yami isn’t cheating basically all the time by being 2 people in one body)

I can’t BELIEVE this show would throw that at me after the number of times I have seen Yami Muto nearly murder other people (and sometimes literally do a murder) out of revenge. Yami is basically a revenge god...like...show...what? It’s season 5, I thought we’ve basically cemented this in. Occasionally the show will just be all “card games are supposed to be fun though!!!” and it’s like...these are the last children on Earth who are playing card games for fun.

If anything, it should be Leon lecturing them on how to have fun. They just murdered a Great Leviathan with cards. Before that they were dealing with Noah, with Marik, with Pegasus, with Bakura. The times that Yugi has just played a game for fun has been...This Arc.

So maybe Yami is just begging himself to have fun for once. Maybe he’s just mad that he can’t play a single tournament without someone getting possessed? Maybe his frustrations really aren’t about little Leaping Leon, and more to do with Yami sick and tired of being a protagonist.

But, youknow, it’s not an anime, unless the protagonist hypocritically can get away with every sin out there and everyone else gets punished for it. So lets find out just how far Leon fell from fun-having grace with a flashback.

This Belle cosplayer went off in like...one of the most hilariously bad accents I’ve heard in a while, it was just so much, I’ll probably cap it because lolol.

But since Leon wasn’t actually in line to inherit the company, he has to sort of hole up in his room for his entire childhood. It’s kinda weird, since we can’t assume that Zigfried will either a.) live forever or b.) have or adopt or raise children in any capacity. But they’re pretty sure Zigfried will live forever, and in this universe--maybe.

Also, I’m really not sure why they have to dress like it’s 1890, but they sure are. The Victorian era just never left the Von Schroeder house. Like these women are wearing corsets to be in that dress, and you can’t BUY a corset to match this type of dress, you have to make your own, and I know, because in Quarantine, I got really into historical sewing videos.

I can’t believe I spent an entire year watching historical sewing videos. Holy crap. I don’t even sew.

But then again...Seto is kind of drawn like he wears a corset...so maybe people are still wearing them in the Yugioh universe? Maybe that’s how their fashion just works?

Guys...I analyze Yugioh fashion a lot but the fact that the Edwardians never freakin left this worldly plane is just...that’s canon to Yugioh. I really just want to sit back and analyze Yugioh fashion with a moodboard and try to connect all the dots logically as if they aren’t just one-off jokes, but I don’t know how I’d fit that on this post.

And like, one of y’all brought up in a comment in the last post that what’s neat about this arc is we are seeing Zigfried as what Seto would have been like if he hadn’t like...gotten cursed by Yugi Muto. So, going off that idea, I think it’s kinda fun that Zigfried’s outfit is a bit of a younger take on Pegasus’ whole look with the wrist lace and a fusion of Gozaburos look of wearing a cravat with a smoking coat. It’s fun to imagine that this is what Seto’s inner gremlin dresses like (which...now I think about it...was a thing from S1 where Yami defeated a Seto gremlin but...I don't remember much about it) Of course, Seto would also be hella dead if he hadn’t gone through the Yugi cycle, but it’s still a fun road to think about.

Plus, when we go down that road, it really makes this arc look even more like it’s just about Seto Kaiba’s therapy sesh to recover from the last several seasons that he’s accidentally (or intentionally??) invited the entire world to watch and that’s very funny to me.

Bro has informed me you can make a deck out of Jerry but could not show me any receipts.

...I mean that is Dartz right?

Like I know all the characters have cards of themselves IRL and all the characters are also based on cards that were made before they were on TV (with the exception of our main cast that was...youknow, a horror manga) but like...

...what’s up, Dartz?

Anyway, our little Mokuba decides to sneak out the house and run around the world at the ripe ol age of ... what I’m guessing is like 10-12, and is pretty sure he can just get away with that. Luckily, the crimes he’s committing are exactly the type of crimes that Zigfried needs.

(Pretty sure their Dad died or is incapacitated but OK, dub, go ahead and pretend that plot point didn’t go down last episode.)

Also, I’m really glad we got a good storyboarder for this part who was like “Zigfried looks...like that?” and still managed to make this character design really work this episode. In some parts they even gave Zigfried those wide Marik Eyes that are kind of ubiquitous with Yugioh. It just needs the right hands to draw it, and then any amount of...this outfit...can work.

So, just like when we met Mokuba in S1, he’s gonna do a duel on Yugi to save his family and probably also like Mokuba, not give a damn for how this game is supposed to be played. Luckily, this time Pharaoh doesn’t have any star chips lying around for this kid to just run around and steal before booking it out the back gate.

Yugi over there with his twitter-brand hot-takes, not knowing the difference between actual brainwashing and blackmail/family pressure.

(WHY IS MAI HERE?)

Look at that hatching!

Ah this is the 00′s content I’m here for! Check out the soft brush! The dodge and burn! Ah! Man this sure was an era of computer art! and stuff like this cost a lot of money to make and it looked ... like this!

Now I’m pretty sure we can make art that looks this dated on like...a free phone app.

PS please do not ever shade your art like this. This is what you don’t do. Do not do this. I will shed a single tear shaped like the Photoshop symbols for dodge and burn.

Also...guys...

next episode is Ep 13. Every season so far this show has been like “we’re normal, everything is normal” getting us complacent until exactly Ep 13, when everything gets really effed up. So...

will that happen? Will they continue this tradition into S5 or has it been a coincidence until now? Excited to find out.

Anyway, if you just got here, this is the link to read these from the beginning in chrono order:

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono

[aethersea]

you know what, I never do these things, but actually I’ve decided I would like to get to know people better! I would like to partake of the mortifying ordeal! I would like to talk about myself for a bit!

ok for the next...let’s say five days I will answer any of these things that people tag me in, or any random personal questions you plop in my ask box. I don’t have an ask meme on hand but just....pick one you’ve seen recently, or make up questions of your own, and I’ll answer. (the answer might be ‘nope that’s private’ but I will answer.) (@ the anon who asked for book recs - I see you, I’ve been thinking of books all day, I’m going to give you SUCH a long answer, I hope you don’t regret your choices bc it WILL be full of gushing)

alright, let’s go!

🌻 Tag 9 people you want to get to know better

Tagged by @booksandchainmail​

Last Song: I’m currently listening to “Falcon in the Dive” from the Scarlet Pimpernel musical on loop. I watched one or two Scarlet Pimpernel movies when I was just barely too young to fully get what was going on, and the story’s held an odd but deep-seated place in my heart ever since. A few years ago I found out there’s a musical and most of the songs are pretty stellar (go listen to “Madame Guillotine” if you like big ensemble broadway numbers, it’s a banger, the bit where he cries out for God has been running through my mind on and off for a few days now haha not like that’s topical or anything), so every once in a while I spend a few days listening to them a lot.

Sometime last year I read the actual book, and got super into the whole concept of the Scarlet Pimpernel for a while. I plotted out Pimpernel aus for several fandoms, I read the entire wikipedia article, and I went looking for bootlegs of the musical. I didn’t find one, but I did find a full radioplay-style recording of the script, complete with full musical numbers, and listened to it like a podcast.

Reader, I was so disappointed. The play adds some scenes, bc a lot of the dramatic tension of the novel comes from internal conflict and that doesn’t stage super well, and the very first scene of this play – a play written in the NINETIES – features our dashing hero rescuing some aristocrats from a French prison, and then saying to the person in the next cell, who begs for rescue but is not an aristocrat, “We have enough of your kind in England.”

Enough! of your KIND! What in the merry frickety HECK my dudes!! The book has some rather unfortunate™ takes but it is from 1905, it’s regrettable but sadly to be expected. This play is from 1997. It has NO excuse. This scene wasn’t even in the book! What! the heck!

I was so disheartened that I lost my excitement for the play, and a couple songs later I stopped listening. It occurred to me just a few days ago that you could actually stage that ironically, with the person in the cell giving the audience a “can you believe this” look, and then the rest of the play could feature assorted non-aristocratic ensemble members constantly looking at the audience like they’re on The Office. And hey, maybe that’s what they did, or something similar – maybe that was never meant to be taken as a cleanly heroic stance, and the play deals with it in a complex way. It’s possible. I wouldn’t know. Kinda doubt it though, based on song lyrics.

Favorite Color: red, probably

Last Movie: I watched that new lesbian christmas movie with my family for christmas, the one with kirsten stewart and the guy from schitt’s creek. it’s very sweet and good and kinda sad, and I really enjoyed it. it also incidentally has the best gay best friend trope in probably anything ever, bc it’s not a trope (I didn’t realize until several hours after watching that it technically fits), it’s just a guy who is the protagonist’s best friend, and they’re just all gay, and then when he Gives Relationship Advice as a gay best friend always does, it’s advice about how to deal with your partner’s hangups around coming out.

actually every part of the gay best friend trope becomes better when they’re just best friends who are both gay. the big dramatic gestures (in this case, driving some ungodly distance in the snow on no notice) go from “haha how kooky” to “queer man will do anything he needs to to rescue his queer friend from an isolating & potentially triggering situation”. the relationship advice isn’t “honey you deserve some self-respect, treat yourself”, it’s a deeply sincere reminder of the vulnerability that is shared across almost everyone’s queer experience, and look I could ramble about this for a long time before reaching a coherent point but I’m INTO IT, okay? I’m into it.

Last Show: you want me to remember what show I last finished???? impossible, cannot be done, it was a long time ago and the adhd has eaten everything that happened before last week. here, instead I’ll tell you about another movie I watched, late at night with my mom in cozy companionship just a couple days ago. it’s called Quigley Down Under and it’s about a cowboy who goes to Australia and kills a bunch of racists, 10/10 would watch again. it’s from 1990 but it feels much older, with the music choices and the cinematography of a 70s Western. the cowboy is great, honorable and fearless and kind, but the breakaway star of this movie for me is the woman who attaches herself to his side and refuses to leave. her name is Cora, and she’s crazy, in the sense that she’s not altogether tethered to reality, but this never for a second diminishes her agency. she’s fierce and clever and compassionate, and she basically never does anything she doesn’t want to in the whole movie. her arc is about overcoming trauma by taking charge of her own fear and facing it head-on, she is never belittled or dismissed by the narrative or the protagonist, and look she’s just so cool. I love her. she’s so vibrantly alive. her story could probably have been handled with a bit more nuance, but honestly for the 90s it’s pretty great. I’m no expert, but I found nothing objectionable in it, just a bit of heavy-handedness.

anyway the theme of the movie is that racism is evil and racists deserve to be shot, and this too could have been handled better (not a single aboriginal character speaks a single line of english in this movie), but it follows through on that message in every way, while still being a fun kinda campy cowboy movie. overall a very good time.

Currently Watching: started showing my sister Hilda the other day, and she’s liking it! I love that show, it’s so incredibly cute. can’t wait to see season 2

Currently Reading: lmao I wish. lately the brain has firmly rejected all attempts to read anything of any length. currently pending, bc I was halfway through them when my brain stalled out, are tano’s fic What Does Kill You Can Make You Stronger, Too, a Toby Daye book - I think it was The Brightest Fell, I got like half a chapter in and haven’t picked it up in over a month, the Locked Tomb series, and probably a few other things too. ooh! also a book called Making Sex by thomas laqueur, which is my fancy academic reading that I’ve been doing in short bursts for the past year or two when I feel fancy and academic. it’s about the development of the concept of biological sex and of gender in Western society, and it’s fascinating. has among other things introduced me to the idea that until quite recently, fathers were a matter of faith. the mother? yeah, you can watch the baby pop out, we all know who the mother is. but the father? how can you know? how can you really know? we have paternity tests these days, but for all of human history up until now, we've just had to take fatherhood on faith. (not to mention we didn’t even know what fathers were contributing to the production of a fetus. clearly it was something, since you can’t get pregnant without a penis getting involved, but we have literally not known what until the past few decades. and that is wild. it has colored ALL of human history, all of our conceptions of society and family and kinship and gender, all of it, and it hadn’t even occurred to me until it was spelled out for me in this book, and it’s just......wow.

Salty, sweet or savory: for christmas my sister and I made seven different types of cookie, most of them involving chocolate somehow.

Craving: no bc I ate so many cookies. unless sleep counts. or maybe pringles, it’s been many moons since last I had a potato chip and I miss them.

Coffee or Tea: no thank you

Tagging: @coloursisee, @krchy-tuna, @sam-j-squirrel, @xzienne, @mirandatam, @viciousmaukeries, @sepulchritude, @elidyce, and @navigatorsnorth bc it’s been a while since we’ve talked, and I’m super hyped that you’re married now. v happy for you!

[whats-a-jarjar]

ACOTAR SHIPS

okay i don’t know if anyone will see this... probably not but i wanted to get it out and state my thoughts. these are just my opinions so please don’t be mad if you disagree with me! obviously we don’t know everything so most of it is up in the air clearly. but here we go...

⚠️Acosf spoilers obviously 🤪⚠️

OK obviously this is about Elain Gwyn and lucien and azriel and you know that whole discussion.

so let’s start with Elain. OK I liked Elain a lot in the first couple books and I actually did like Elriel. I shipped them pretty hard. but after reading a court of silver flames and the Azriel POV bonus chapter my thoughts have changed.

I don’t think Elain and Azriel are meant to be together anymore. I just don’t think they love each other.  I think they like each other and are infatuated with each other but most of all I think they like what the other one represents. 

for Azriel I think he struggles a lot with his self acceptance and belonging. like in the Azriel chapter I think that became clear when he was talking about how he was jealous of Cassian and rhys. all his life he’s been an outsider, with his brothers and his family and with the people of the night court like the citizens, and even in the inner circle. I don’t think the inner circle sees him as an outsider nor do the readers but I think honestly Azriel sees himself as an outsider even with the inner circle. as well as the fact that he’s never really accepted himself and accepted the things he’s been through over the past 500 years. he still struggles with who he is, what his shadows mean, and with love especially. I think for him to see his brothers end up with two of the archeron sisters, he already feels like an outsider and that made him feel even more so. I think he is hopeful that Elain could be his mate or that the cauldron was wrong because he desperately wants to feel that love and feel that belonging plus it doesn’t help that now Cassian and rhys are like actual brothers by law. for Azriel I think Elain represents that belonging and how they can all be one big happy family(in his mind bc to us they already are). and that’s what he so desperately wants and loves. Because in the Azriel chapter when he was talking about Elain or thinking about her he didn’t really seem to talk about her personally or her personality but rather sexual attraction and then what she represents (to Rhys). and along with the conversation with rhys I don’t think azriel believes he has a claim on elain or that he deserves her I just think he really wants to fit in. and although Azriel was looking at her gift of like the powder every night before bed Which don’t get me wrong is pretty cute I still think he’s doing that out of his need for love and belonging rather than love for Elain. 

now Elain. OK for her I’m not sure if she likes Azriel. I think she does but I don’t know if she loves him either. I think she also likes what he represents. For her Azriel is her own choice and her rebellion. Since going into the cauldron she’s lost all of that: her humanity her choice her control. I think she wants to be with Azriel because she can control it. I mean I think she is sexually attracted to azriel as he is to her but I don’t think there’s any love.

as for Elain and Lucien because it ties in as well, whether they end up together or not I think they could be good for each other. i saw this in another post but I think Elain connects lucien to her trauma with the cauldron. Especially with her lack of choice and control because the cauldron took away her humanity, it took away her life, her friends, all that she had in the human world and then right when she came out Lucien was like im your mate which  immediately took away her choice in relationships and her control with love. I want Elain to give Lucien a chance whether that’s romantically or just getting to know him because I think that could help her with her trauma and you know if she wants to reject mating bond for whatever reason I hope that she at least tries to get to know Lucien. but I also think elain‘s being a little cold to Lucien because he was just thrown in it the same way she was. He thought he found his mate already in jesminda and then Elain shows up and is his mate and he’s almost as opposed to the idea as she is. I just want her to give him a chance because I think he could help her overcome her trauma and he can be open to love again since i think he’s fearful of it negates of jesminda. I just think the pairing could be cool for both of them.🤷🏼‍♀️

okay here’s why i don’t think elriel are a good pairing (aside from love). OK Elain represents flowers light bright colors life. Azriel represents shadows dark colors the night death. they’re opposites. And while i’m all here for a forbidden love opposites attract story, I just don’t think it works with them. for instance azriels shadows disappear around Elain. While I thought that was cute at first and I was like “aww she’s the light in his life“ looking back now i think they shouldn’t disappear around his “person”. azriels shadows are a part of him and although obviously he didn’t want to go through what he went through and no one should have to, they still remain an extension of who he is. if he were to end up with elain he’d have to change who he is. he wouldn’t be able to be the spy master or the shadow singer or the introvert with the dark past which we all know and love as Azriel. I don’t think elain can be with that type of person either. Despite hearing about her getting her hands dirty referring to gardening I don’t think she can be with someone like Azriel who is a torturer and could be seen as merciless. (which is one of my favorite things about him which is slightly concerning for me but anyways...) Azriel would just have to change who he is to be with elain for his sake and for hers... which is really toxic so… as well it was mentioned by Cassian and Nesta that Elain looks terrible in black. Well they said she looked pretty but that it just didn’t suit her and like was pulling the life out of her. And nesta mentioned she’d be happy in the spring court as she likes gardening, she thrives on light and life. so I don’t think the night court is for her as well as azriel isn’t for her as he represents the dark and literally black and the night court. 

now i think it would be cool if she did end up with lucien and he either became the high Lord of the Springcourt or the day court (which I’m still really pissed that we’ve been through a whole other book without anyone telling Lucien helion is his father like hello he’s an important character... rude). it would just allow her to thrive as,in my option, we haven’t really seen her do so far. [Plus I think a possibility of an evil elain would be so cool. I don’t think she would actually go against her family with evil intentions, but if she made a bargain of some sort and ended up being an antagonist but not a villain I wouldn’t hate it. At the moment she’s a little boring, but then again we don’t really know her personality so I’m open to an awesome character arc]

OK now it’s Gwynriel time!! OK not to start any fights, but I’m not gonna lie, the few interactions we’ve had between Gwyn and Azriel has started a whole feud because it has so much more chemistry compared to the few Azriel and elain moments we’ve had over almost four whole books. but gwynriel. ok no matter who you ship, I think we can all agree that we love gwyn and gwyn is a great character.  Plus I think she’s perfect for az. now I know a lot of people don’t like the proof about azriels shadows, but I actually think that’s really important. like I mentioned earlier, azriels shadows are a part of who he is and extension of him.  now clearly they like Gwyn, they are the president of the Gwynriel fan club, and they ship them hard.  they interact a lot with her a lot. Now I think because of this Gwyn and however azriel will cope in his book will allow him to embrace his shadows and except himself. this is really important to his character in my opinion. I think, and I’m not sure how to be honest, but his shadows liking Gwyn and Gwyn seeking comfort in the dark ( which probably means she likes his shadows) will allow Azriel to see his shadows and his scars and his past as not some thing that will bring him down but rather something almost to be proud of since he went through so much. I think once Azriel learns to accept himself and all parts of him, he will better be able to see that his family accepts him, because no one is really able to see that they’re accepted unless they accept themselves. and I think he would finally feel that he belongs somewhere which is such a good story to me and I don’t know if that’s just because I personally connect or I just want Azriel to be happy with himself and his life and whoever is in it but I think that sounds awesome☺️

so there’s a lot of possibilities about what will happen in the next book which we still don’t even know who’s point of view it is because apparently it’s so “obvious” but actually sarah it’s not so please tell us!! I do think in Elains book her trial, whatever that may be, is going to happen at the prison because feyres happened under the mountain and nestas happened on ramiel and there’s an extra mountain and an extra sister so I feel like that could definitely be a thing that happens but who knows?? I don’t know but these are just my thoughts and I missing points obviously I’m not perfect spoiler alert, but yeah. 

if anyone has any opinions let me know!! I love discussing things especially books!

okay thanks for coming to my TED talk 🙂

[kitkatopinions]

While thinking about the flaws of the main four protagonists in RWBY, I realized something. You can pretty clearly trace the flaws of three of the four main characters back to their early roots, whether or not the show addresses them as flaws currently. But with Blake, you can’t really do that.

TL;DR at the bottom

Ruby started the show being over-confident and reckless. She was a combat school student with only two years of learning under her belt when she took on Torchwick (although she may not have known who he was.) She easily assumes her team can handle Torchwick and the White Fang, wanders off alone in Mountain Glenn, charges after Torchwick again in the Fall of Beacon, travels to Haven to fight against Cinder without understanding any of the particulars and seemingly with no plan, and unnecessarily leads her team into stealing an Atlas plane while literally telling Qrow that she doesn’t care what he thinks and basically tells him to go along with it or leave. Any of those events could’ve resulted in her death, and it was often - not always, but often - due to outside forces that she survived (Glynda rescuing her, Oobleck realizing about the underground city, tons of fellow Beacon students + Atlas military taking out Grimm after the train crash, a Grimm eating Torchwick, Qrow taking out Grimm on the path to Haven, Qrow saving them from Tyrian, Cordovin aiding them after their unnecessary actions result in a massive Grimm attack.) So when she refuses to accept a no-win situation, traps a city in the direct line of Salem’s fire, sends out a message to everyone that might cause mass panic directly condemning Ironwood for trying to save as many as he can, and then doesn’t have a plan to actually save anyone in Mantle or Atlas, it’s very frustrating, but it’s not surprising or hugely out of character. It’s easy to track this. Ruby’s over-confidence, recklessness, and stubbornness started small and with her only striving to be a hero whether she was ready or not. And left unchecked, it just continued to grow. Weiss started the show being judgmental, rude, and prone to pettiness. Although she seemed to open up quickly to her team and these flaws seemed to die down considerably in volumes 4-5, it’s not exactly out of left field for her to act the way she does towards Whitley in volumes 7 and 8. In V1 Weiss judged Ruby as a child who didn’t know what she was talking about that had taken something from Weiss (the leader role,) and therefore Weiss acted like Ruby was a nuisance and treated her coldly and aggressively. She was hugely judgmental towards Sun, and Blake as well the minute she learned Blake was a Faunus and a former White Fang member, and even after she decided Blake was fine anyway (so badly handled) she made it clear that she wasn’t accepting Sun just yet. Despite any growth she might’ve had with her team, we never see her change outside of that. It becomes clear it’s still a problem, when Weiss is confronted by her considerably younger brother in volumes 7 and 8. Weiss judged him as a child who didn’t know what he was talking about that had taken something from her (her position as CEO of the company) and therefore, Weiss acted like he was a nuisance and treated him coldly and aggressively. Weiss showed no sympathy to him despite knowing his home life. It’s easy to track this. Her pettiness, judgmental tendencies, and aggressiveness never went away, they just stopped being directed at Ruby, Jaune, or the rest of her friends. Yang’s flaws are always easily tracked. She’s got a big temper, charges into things without thinking, and she’s pushy. We see this from the start as she pushes Ruby to make friends despite her clear discomfort and explodes at Grimm for damaging her hair. This continues on pretty clearly in the first couple of seasons, including Yang refusing to give Blake space, and yelling at her with red eyes and pushing her when she wasn’t listening. The funny thing about Yang is that most of this gets addressed and started getting worked through. Yang charging into battle and over-relying on her semblance are combat driven problems that are pointed out to her by her father and worked on to overcome. Yang is much calmer and patient than she had to be with Raven, continues to be patient and understanding with Qrow and Oz when she finds out they’ve been keeping things from the group in volume five, she listens to and accepts Weiss’s advice, and doesn’t lash out at Blake at all when she returns. Although she was still clearly the same person, she was also clearly working on her flaws and trying to be better. However, this seems to backslide in the latest three seasons, with her acting aggressive and not even trying to understand Oz, acting aggressive and not even trying to understand the Ace Ops, pushing Ren to talk about his feelings and then getting angry at him for expressing ones she doesn’t think he should feel, launching into battle without thinking repeatedly and seeming to not really take the situation seriously sometimes. This is frustrating to me, but it’s easy to track, too. Yang was working on her flaws, but has recently backslid into old habits.

But Blake? Blake’s early flaws were things like taking too much responsibility on her shoulders, being unable to let things go, running from her trauma, and lashing out at her friends. Many of her stronger traits were connected to her flaws, and were things like standing up for herself and others, having a strong moral code, and being responsible. (NOTE: Her arc and the allegories to real world racism were absolutely mishandled, making things like her strong moral code - like ‘stealing is always wrong’ - problematic in context. However, for the sake of this argument, I’m referring to her strong moral code as a strong trait as in it was something distinct about her character that we were meant to see as a good trait.) Blake had firm standards, like ‘stealing is wrong,’ and ‘I can’t wait for others to handle things for me, I have to handle it myself.’ During the course of seasons 4 and 5, her character arc was centered around learning to embrace her strong traits without falling into her bad ones. Like Yang, many of her flaws were directly addressed during these seasons, Sun and her parents helping her see that she can rely on and trust others, Blake expressing herself without lashing out, Blake confronting her past head-on in the forms of Adam and Ilia rather than running from it, and finally letting go of much of her own guilt and self-deprecation at the same time. The funny thing about Blake now is that she’s still showing flaws, they just aren’t the flaws she used to have that all pretty much got tied up in a bow, pun unintended. Instead, many of the flaws Blake seems to be showing now are in direct contrast to her former strong traits. She doesn’t stand up for herself, leaving it to Weiss or Yang to speak up for her. She doesn’t take responsibility, putting it on Ruby’s shoulder and begging her to help her in fights. She doesn’t have the extreme moral code, being one hundred percent fine with stealing, beating up law enforcement officers, fighting against the government, etc. Like, not to say that those things are always bad, just that Blake thought they were always bad, not that long ago. This is why, out of all the main characters, Blake is the most upsetting to me. I can hate what Ruby, Yang, or Weiss do, but Blake doesn’t even feel like the same character anymore. Adding onto that, she doesn’t seem like a powerful or interesting fighter anymore either when she used to be very good and very interesting to watch. This makes her just... Feel like a chess piece that CRWBY has say things every now and again to sound good. She feels like another weapon that Yang can just use sometimes. It’s honestly hard to see, because Blake could’ve been a really great character, and now she doesn’t feel like a character at all.

TL;DR It’s easy to track the flaws of Ruby, Yang, and Weiss all throughout the show, but Blake’s recently displayed flaws directly go against her early characteristics. This makes it feel like her whole character is different.

[madsinartime]

thoughts about tfatws

aka cacw (2021) ;)

this will be kinda long, so more under the cut!

Sam and Bucky

i love their relationship. whether you ship them or see them as bros this show gives you everything you could want. sam and bucky’s character and relationship development are the best parts of the show. sam learns to overcome his insecurities and pick up the shield, bucky learns to forgive himself and move on from the winter soldier. although to be honest, who let the fanfic writers into marvel? the couples’ therapy scene and rolling in the flower field are straight (not) out of ao3.

sam wilson IS captain america. i hope that in future movies he’ll continue to be political and an activist, not just focus on all the avenger threats and forget about the stuff that continues to happen on the ground. sam’s a guy who follows through. let’s see him at marches, rallies, campaigning for something better. the show was a step up in representation about different perspectives than the usual mcu stuff and i hope they continue with that.

bucky! him living with the wilsons’ is canon now. i love that he’s finally got his happy ending :) i hope he’ll be in black panther, at least a lil cameo! i think he is great friends with t’challa shuri and all the dora milaje! maybe a bit of how he became known as white wolf? or earning the title? he definitely trained with the dora, rmb how he threw that pole like a spear :D

Zemo

i kinda like zemo as a character now. he’s definitely still a terrible person but hey. he’s a fun guy. he even got the last laugh with orchestrating blowing up the rest of the super soldiers from prison. i wonder what he’ll do about john walker? US agent is definitely the guy zemo hates. would be a cool subplot in a future movie/show.

Sharon Carter

this is such a step up for her from winter soldier and civil war! she’s a badass shield special agent and it really showed. her fight scene in the shipyard is one of my favourite. making her a villain? i mean i kinda get why she’ll be so jaded from being on the run for years. there are some theories where she’s like a skrull,, but idk. the part where she’s the power broker seemed a bit ?? at first, but here’s what i think:

sharon didn’t get blipped. it was shown in endgame but she could have disappeared and so everyone assumed she was dusted. 5 years seems a bit short to build a criminal empire, plus zemo had heard of the power broker and he was in jail the whole time. in those 5 years maybe the original power broker got blipped, and in the power vacuum (lol) sharon took over. makes sense why zemo would think the power broker was a dude. after everyone returned maybe sharon killed the power broker for real or he’s out there hiding and we’ll see the two go at each other. that could be fun to see. as for leading sam bucky and zemo to dr nagle, sharon was playing the long game. nagle maybe was upset with her/not doing so well and she wanted to get rid of him so no one else could get the formula. or she’s already compiled his notes and decided he was a liability. leading the gang to dr nagle and defending them against the bounty hunters (remember someone had to know and send out the message after killing selby) would put her in sam’s good graces and he would get her pardoned, then she could operate outside of madripoor (maybe getting away from the original power broker). anyway i think it would be cool to see what she gets up to in the future.

The Flag Smashers

hmmm. i liked them at the start of the show. karli was young and radicalised by the life after the blip, and she wanted a better life. which is great. i know the flag smashers’ plot was a bit messed up by the pandemic and the had to rewrite some stuff, and the writer’s did a good job considering. still, i dislike how the entire flag smashers became villainized by just karli’s extreme actions. i think that she could’ve had better character development, like john walker’s, where she was out to do good and then because of the serum she became too extreme and spiraled. the first time people get killed is because of an accident. also at the end the whole thing seemed driven by karli, and rest of them were like uhh what are u doing girl. could have been better, but alright, i guess.

in future movies, i hope that we’ll see the flag smashers again. remember they were a global network (with parallels to hydra, which is like, not cool, marvel) with supporters all over the world. just because the leaders were killed off doesn’t mean the movement would stop. 

John Walker

marvel’s stepping up with their villain game, which is awesome. john’s negative character development was great and quite believable, considering the way the american government treats its veterans. john likely has trauma and ptsd and a whole host of other stuff that led to his going crazy, all amplified by the serum. he’s a really good example of ‘the road to hell is paved with good intentions’. he does want to be a good person, like him saving the truck instead of going after karli showed, but that doesn’t fully redeem him. let your villains be villains marvel. let him go off, azula style. (not sure marvel is the type to let that happen, but it would be awesome to explore john’s psyche like that.)

Lemar Hoskins

*sigh* i feel like marvel let us down with this one. all the progressiveness in this show and they had to kill off the black sidekick to further the white man’s character arc. come on. i have Thoughts about this. see, this could have been an amazing opportunity to explore lemar and john’s characters. john’s spiral off the deep end, lemar having to reconcile his best friend with this guy, who is nothing like the great man he once knew. everone thinks that john is irredeemable, lemar keeps trying to get him to therapy. john goes crazy from the serum, lemar having to fight against his brother. lemar goes to bucky and asks for help, because he thinks it’s like what happened with the winter soldier thing. bucky learns to help someone he disliked because he too can see the similarities and that john does need help. in the end, john goes full evil and has to be taken down by his best friend. the parallels this would have had with the steve/bucky relationship, yall. 

lol if u got this far, congrats and thanks for reading my rambles :D just out here Thinking my Thoughts

[cheekbites-moved]

oz, alice & the creation of love: an ozlice meta

hello it is i, known ozlice defender. here to explain why they need to be credited for inventing love, bc. They Did That. & i just wanna gush about my favorite scene of all time, involving my favorite couple of all time, because both are very precious to me and i’m very passionate about them!!

disclaimer: if your interpretation of oz/alice’s relationship differs from mine, i respect that. all i ask is that my interpretation of their relationship being romantic be equally respected. i am simply writing my own post, on my own blog, discussing my own interpretation of this scene and their relationship dynamic within it/as a whole. if you disagree, please refrain from debating me on my interpretation. my voicing of my interpretation doesn’t mean yours is in any way invalid or not allowed to exist, so please don’t treat mine that way if you don’t share it. thank you. 

tw for blood, gore, and mentions of neglect/abandonment issues.

anyway so! the scene in question is the cheek biting scene from chapter 41. in my opinion, this is one of the most crucial scenes for oz’s character development, & is a scene that beautifully encapsulates the depth of the impact oz and alice have on each other.

before i get into the meat of the chapter itself, i’d like to first establish my perception of oz’s character up to the point this chapter takes place, to really get across why this moment is so pivotal for him.

pandora hearts is one of those series that begins with a collection of stereotypes, both in the story and characters, then works to completely dismantle them as the story goes on. oz is no exception to this trend.

he starts out as a pretty typical protagonist, to be honest. he’s bubbly, peppy, (also flirty) and is always the first to bounce back from the rougher things the cast goes through. he’s an optimist, and prefers to focus on happy distractions rather than the reality of the harsh situations the cast finds themselves in.

but, see, that’s the thing. his entire outward personality itself is a distraction. it’s all a facade. oz hasn’t forgotten any of the pain he’s been dealt, nor has he even begun to heal from any of it. because he has put the role of “the happy friend who has to stay happy for their friends’ happiness’ sake" on himself. which has caused him to learn to bottle things up. which has lead his mind to believing that presenting any negative emotion would be a burden to those around him. he’s afraid of presenting them because he fears rejection, but also, he’s afraid of his loved ones hurting for his sake. 

a lot of oz’s arc revolves around him overcoming this mentality, and the development that entails starts with chapter 41.

for those who need a refresher, chapter 41 takes place while the group is exploring the ruins of sablier. they all get separated at one point, lead astray by the hauntings of their unremembered pasts. 

oz finds himself alone, and is confronted again with the horrors of the tragedy, as well as his own unremembered past, and begins to panic.

elliot and leo hear him screaming, so they go off to look for him. 

after they first arrive and oz properly notices them, he instantly snaps back to his bubbly self, acting like nothing happened.

they walk together, eventually running into gil and also xai. xai’s appearance, and proceeding dismissal of oz’s presence further burdens oz with the trauma of his father’s neglect, on top of the already previously disregarded distress from his past.

xai was sent to retrieve elliot, who denies his help, saying it should be offered to his own son instead. xai scoffs, and further dismisses oz’s existence in a more direct manor by speaking ill of him, further contributing to oz’s increasing emotional instability.

leo manages to get xai to leave, explaining that he and elliot already have plans to get back on their own, so his help isn’t necessary. xai departs as oz’s emotions start to fully destabilize, with oz thinking to himself about the pain he’s feeling. he attempts to reach out to gil, but gil runs off after xai to confront him.

oz canonically has abandonment issues, and they originated from xai’s neglect. i’m sure in the moment, after just having confronted the source of his abandonment issues, having gil leave him behind felt like a further abandonment, and it breaks him down the rest of the way.

his mind starts to spiral, putting him in conflict with himself, as his tendencies to remain stable and happy are pitted against the destructive urges arising within him to cope with the instability.

he begins a descent into darkness he can’t control as his powers start to spark up and begin causing destruction, a very similar scenario to his breakdown in the cheshire arc.

before he can commit any permanent damage, however, alice arrives at the perfect time to disrupt his spiel.

her interruption snaps him back to reality, and he is instantly tamed by her appearance

as he regains himself, he also defaults to putting up his facade yet again, casually talking to her as if nothing happened. alice knows him well enough to notice the subtle cracks in his mask, though, and asks him what’s wrong.

oz holds to his habits, and attempts to brush his emotions off by saying it’s nothing,

but alice interrupts him before he can continue disregarding his feelings through biting his cheek

oz is completely taken aback by the action, and alice explains to an equally baffled elliot that sharon showed her a book where a woman ‘bit’ a man’s cheek to cheer him up.

alice further explains herself to oz, telling him that she heard him calling out to her (through a memory, though she’s unaware of that in the moment), with “such a pitiful voice she had to go find him.” 

noting afterward that she wished he would be that open with his emotions more often, so she could cheer him up.

as she says all of this, oz looks at her in pure bewilderment

but then, realization strikes him

he notes his realization, thinking to himself:

"My anxiety, my weaknesses.. I thought if I gave my voice to them.. I would be burdening the people around me... But... ...I guess it’s not always like that."

this line is crucial for the rest of oz’s character arc, and the weight it entails carries on throughout the rest of the series. 

this realization, this moment as a whole, is the first time oz lets himself properly acknowledge the deception behind how his mind has forced him to perceive himself. this is the first time oz actually acknowledges and processes that he is allowed to feel pain. that having pain does not make him a burden. and from this moment forward, oz begins to open up about his feelings more.

starting moments later when they reunite with gil, and oz openly expresses that he’s hurting to gil for the first time.

this progresses to him slowly becoming more direct about his feelings, both through his words and the facial expressions he allows himself to show.

(chapter 60)

(chapter 74)

(chapter 75)

and this all culminates full circle when he finally allows himself to fully cry in later volumes when he needs to.

(chapter 82)

(chapter 87)

(chapter 92)

(chapter 97)

(chapter 104)

that scene in chapter 41, is what directly leads to the emotional vulnerability oz allows himself to have as the series goes on. alice loved oz enough to feel his pain, and to make an effort to seek him out so she could cheer him up when she was aware he was hurting. oz’s love and trust for alice finally allowed him to feel comfortable enough to let down some of his walls to someone for the first time. 

after the realization sinks in fully, oz notes that despite how strange her words are to him, they still spark a fire in his heart.

he observes alice afterwards, noting that her presence is what brings beauty in the scenery of the rain, something he tended towards disliking before.

alice is the first person oz allows himself to be vulnerable around because he’s that comfortable around her. alice is the reason that in a moment of negativity, he is able to pause and admire something that’s beautiful to him; something that genuinely puts him at ease, rather than him just faking a moment of serenity to avoid being vulnerable.

whether you see their relationship as romantic or platonic, their deep love for each other is undeniable. and this is the moment that it shines the brightest, in my opinion. this is the moment they invented love together. and i think it’s beautiful to witness.