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bakugoukatsuki-rising · 3 years

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Deku vs Kacchan 2

So a new friend of mine I made on tiktok wanted a meta on Deku v Kacchan 2, and of course I obliged because I never get tired of analyzing their relationship.

Deku v Kacchan 2 was the starting point to a shift in their relationship, because this was when Bakugou came face to face with his inferiority complex, and all of the emotions he had been holding on to came bubbling to the surface, and I would like to preface by saying Deku is the ONLY PERSON Bakugou has EVER shown his weaknesses to without question.

We don’t ever see him cry or vent to anyone else. Not a single person. He is completely open only in front of Deku.

The first example of this is actually in the start of the manga, when Deku means to tell him about One for All out of fear Bakugou would misunderstand him, and Bakugou makes his first step in becoming better by admitting he recognizes he isn’t as strong as he always thought and that Deku beat him. This is also the first time we see Bakugou cry out of frustration, which is a side of him he only ever shows to Deku.

For reference, this is Chapter 11.

My boy is just wanting to be the best, ya know? All his life he’s been boosted up for having such a strong quirk, and for always being the best at stuff, and now suddenly he just...isn’t. That would mess with anyone’s head, honestly. But the one he spills those feelings to, it’s Deku. Not any other person, just Deku. You think if he hated Deku at this point, he would open up about such vulnerable feelings to him?

I don’t think so.

Then we have the second time he’s vulnerable and recognizing different things about himself and Deku during their fight with All Might, and it is another instance we see him crying. Yes, All Might was there, but those emotions were a direct result of Deku’s words to him about not giving up.

For reference, these are chapters 62 & 63.

Look at the raw emotion Deku is able to draw out of this kid. You will never be able to convince me he EVER hated Deku. Yes, even when he bullied him in middle school and told him to kill himself, I don’t believe Bakugou hated him. I believe that he misunderstood him and it scared him, and so he lashed out in anger since that was the only real form of emotion he knew how to properly convey. Was it right? Obviously not, but at least we are able to understand more of his thought process at that time.

So from here, we get into the end of All Might and Deku vs. Kacchan 2.

From the very start of everything, once Deku was given One for All, Bakugou has been spiraling. He had been struggling and fighting with himself, trying to come to terms with the fact that reality proves he isn’t the strongest or greatest and there is actually a shit ton he’s lacking, so he needs to change to be better. That’s a little difficult though when the person who is a constant reminder of your weaknesses is always around you.

Then he comes to the conclusion that Deku was given All Might’s power, and that is kind of like an epiphany to him. I think, when Bakugou realized All Might gave Deku OfA, he really came to understand the parts of Deku he hadn’t before. The parts that made him the perfect individual for that power, even if he acted like he didn’t know and said some shit like “I’m weak, too!” when All Might broke up their fight, he doesn’t want OfA. He wants acknowledgment. Because to him, All Might giving OfA to Deku was like saying that he is the strongest, and he deserves that power.

When in reality it’s the opposite. Deku had nothing, he was weak and powerless, and yet immediately willing to protect those around him even if it meant losing his own life, and that’s the true make of a hero. Bakugou recognized that, I believe at least, during Deku vs Kacchan 2.

For reference, these are from chapters 117 & 118

So he’s venting, obviously. This is his opening to the big bit that we’ll be getting to shortly, but this is important but he’s opening himself up to Deku. I’ll say it again,

DEKU IS THE ONLY PERSON BAKUGOU HAS EVER OPENED UP TO EMOTIONALLY

This always gets me because Bakugou knows. I made a whole separate meta about him recognizing those attributes of Deku’s and recognizing that’s what makes him so powerful in his own right.

Bakugou completely understands by this point what it is that made All Might choose Deku. He witnessed time and time again how willing Deku was to throw everything away for other people, how his desire to save came before absolutely anything else. He understands that. This is just his denial, and his pride wanting proof.

Now we’re coming to the big bits, the meat of this entire fight.

I wanted to talk in between them but honestly, they should speak for themselves.

“This battle might have been pointless. Win or lose..maybe it didn’t really matter. But at that moment, I knew I had to fight. Because the only person who understood what Kacchan was feeling, was me.”

Now we have Deku recognizing what this is all about, that Bakugou is opening himself up to him and exposing those weaknesses he’s been struggling with for so long. Guilt, fear, anger, sadness. Bakugou has been holding onto so many things and had nowhere for it to come out until this fight. Remember, right after Kamino and All Might’s end, they went straight back to every day life. Bakugou was forced to train as normal and even take the provisional licensing exam before he was able to get a moment to process everything.

Now that he had time for it, he decided to come out with his feelings, and obviously they needed to be expressed to Deku. He does this because he knows Deku is going to accept them. If he’s learned anything from his time being a little shit, it was that Deku wasn’t going anywhere, and he would listen to him whether he was screaming in anger or crying in pain. Because Deku was raised to show emotion, he cried and it was okay and he wasn’t shamed or told he was weak. He wasn’t held to some imaginary scale of strength because he...never really had any, not the way strength is perceived in this universe, at least.

But Bakugou did have strength, and so it was pushed onto him since his quirk developed, which led to his horrible combination of an inferiority complex and a superiority complex. It skewed the way he saw the people around him, and he couldn’t understand that someone could have strength even if they lacked a quirk or a way to fight. Deku had strength Bakugou didn’t, the strength to protect and care and love without restraint. It terrified Bakugou, and so he tried to push Deku away because of it.

But Deku vs. Kacchan 2 put a ton of stuff in perspective for Bakugou.

For reference this is from chapter 120.

This scene is so beautiful to me. The way it’s implied they make eye contact. The emotion in this scene alone is so powerful, and should immediately tell you their relationship will never be the same; and it wasn’t.

I feel like a lot of people don’t see a difference because Bakugou is still hot-headed and foul-mouthed, but he is in no way the same kid from before this chapter. Not to Deku, and not to anyone else. Being able to express himself and get all of that frustration out from what built up over almost a years time, it allowed him to begin truly changing himself into a better person. This was his starting point to recognizing that he can’t continue just fighting on his own, and he would eventually have to depend on other’s if he wants to be the best. He would have to open himself up.

It’s gradual, and subtle, but it’s there. There are instances of it everywhere. From him joining in on OfA’s meetings, to the ways he encourages Deku to keep getting stronger by pushing him, to the JT when he acts with his team to win, all the way to the current chapters.

Don’t get it twisted though, Bakugou’s development for himself started way before DvK2, but DvK2 is when the real development between Bakugou and Deku started, and these beautiful chapters led us all the way to 284 and 285, which was the most definitive show of development and growth I have ever seen a character make.

#bnha #mha #bnha meta #bnha analysis #bkdk #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #deku #kacchan #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bnha manga #mha manga #deku vs kacchan 2 #dvk2 #bakudeku

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xaibaugrove · 3 years

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Everyone in the Krew is Problematic

I was inspired to go on this rant by someone who recently brought up a question in a server I’m in, asking why so many people in the fandom seem to hate Mako and Makorra and why. This wouldn’t be the first time I defend Mako and it most likely won’t be the last, but it might be the first time I tear him and everyone else in the Krew down in the process, only to bring them back up. Hear me out though.

I think I’ve totally accepted that a lot of people in this fandom will always hate Mako and that I will have to perpetually defend him, I understand that this is the relationship I’ve chosen with this world. But what I still will never understand are the reasons why people hate/dislike him because compared to how much they love other characters in the Krew who honestly aren’t that much better than him (in some cases, even worse!), it doesn’t make any sense.

Let me also preface this by saying, I love these characters with all my heart and soul, probably more than I should love fictional characters, but this is the life I live and with that being said, I am going to tear them apart just to prove a point. Okay, here we go.

MAKO

Most of his detractors list the usual criticisms, which are valid when isolated. He cheated on Asami, he lied to Korra, he was a terrible boyfriend and essentially he treated the women he claimed to love or care about horribly. Gee, it’s almost like the man was a teenager with no experience in having long-lasting, healthy relationships and was raised in the streets by gangmembers while doing anything to survive and provide for his younger sibling after seeing his parents killed right in front of him and suddenly being orphaned…

I think Mako has been torn down enough, so I won’t get too deep into the tearing down part for him. It really does baffle me how someone can claim to be woke and not comprehend how someone coming from poverty could possibly be a product of their environment. Like, does everyone think that poor people automatically have hearts of gold and turn out like Little Orphan Annie? Why are people surprised that when someone has a shitty life, they might do shitty things?

Also, sooo many people love Zuko, who actively tried to cause harm to Aang, Katara and Sokka numerous times, and sympathize with his troubled past. But like, sure Zuko had an abusive father and his mother peaced out of his life for whatever reasons but at least he had his uncle. Mako had his parents for maybe 8 years before they were murdered in front of him and then had...no one for the next 10 years? Except for Bolin, sure, but no other parental figure in his life. Dude literally had to become him and his brother’s own parent and joined a gang to survive, and after all that, the worst he does is acts as a bad boyfriend toward Korra and Asami and he is instantly thrown to the wolves. Something doesn’t add up. It’s just...I don’t get it.

Yes, the way he treated people was bad, but people can grow? That’s a thing humans can do. And he was a teenager, my god. No, we cannot allow our past to be an excuse for how we treat others, but we have to be aware that there is a growth process to being human. And being human in and of itself, isn’t pretty. You think Mako is problematic? Don’t get me started on your fave.

KORRA

Ok, I love this woman to death but she is ridiculously problematic. She pursued someone in a relationship and essentially forced Mako to cheat on Asami by kissing him against his will, that’s already pretty awful and shows a lack of empathy on her part, also kissing people without their consent is no bueno. But also I just have to say it for the people who might not know this. One of the fundamental reasons why Makorra didn’t work was because KORRA WAS ABUSIVE. Okay? It wasn’t just that Mako was inadequate at relationships and didn’t know how to people, it wasn’t that she was secretly confused and wanting Asami the entire time (biphobia at it’s best) one of the main problems in the pairing was that Korra was crazy abusive towards Mako. Seriously, why don’t I see this more often in those discussions??

If we need examples, I have dozens. Honestly, it’s really easy to see how terrible Korra was to Mako, I’d actually argue that she treated him worse than he treated her. I mean, they were both terrible to one another, but in Korra’s case she went through the motions of being completely infatuated with your first teenage crush, getting with said crush, then crashing and burning once you realize that you have no idea how to treat a romantic partner so after the butterflies wear off you subject them to all the wonderful aspects of your anger issues. Not only did she scream at Mako during every argument they had, she also threatened him with bodily harm if she got really angry. Remember how their relationship crashed and burned in Book 2? Here are the things that Korra did during that time. Let me reiterate, this was not okay.

Mako is visibly shaken by this!

This woman burst into her boyfriend’s place of work and violently kicked his desk out from in front of him with all his coworkers present. That is not normal behavior. That is a red flag. And after she came back, had amnesia or whatever and forgot they broke up after that scene, let’s not forget that Mako was legitimately Afraid to break up with her again. Korra made her partner frightened that they might suffer bodily harm if they upset her. Again, and I can’t stress this enough, this is not okay!

The little scene in Book 3 when Korra is lifting Mako like 100 feet off the ground with airbending while he’s screaming in fear just to make Asami laugh is cute, right? I’ll admit, I loved that little moment too, it’s one of the only instances of Korrasami development that we got, but also, there were sooo many things wrong with that scene lol. Not only does Korra terrify Mako for literally no reason, it’s also sort of just her continuing to exercise some degree of power over him for her own amusement. Almost like a subtle reminder to him saying, “I am stronger than you in every way and I can break your femur like a twig if I wanted to… but I won’t, so look how much fun we’re having!”

Now of course, there are reasons why Korra acts like this. She was isolated for almost her entire life and never learned how to treat people and be around people. The Avatar is human because they must live amongst the people they protect and that helps them develop empathy and cherish life. The White Lotus deprived her of that fundamental aspect of her duty as the Avatar and it showed throughout the beginning of the series. Clearly, she was young, didn’t see how her actions could negatively affect others and hurt the feelings of not just her partner but also friends and family (she was really awful towards a lot of people in her life!). But as the series went on, we see her having less outbursts and learning to control her temper more.

One can only assume that she does not have the same behavior with Asami because for one, I don’t think Asami would play that shit, she seems like she would electrocute a bitch in a heartbeat and not hesitate if needed, but also Korra is not the same shitty partner she used to be as a teenager. Again, kids do stupid things. Adults do stupid things. And we learn and we grow. Korra will probably make some more mistakes in her relationship with Asami. I don't think anyone can have one bad relationship and suddenly learn all the lessons they can from it and have a perfect one the next go around. I can totally picture Korra losing her temper and raising her voice at Asami if she gets frustrated and forgets who she’s dealing with. Managing anger issues is hard, I know this from experience, and it doesn’t magically get easier. Of course, if Korra does pop off, Asami would definitely put her in her place because she’s a bad bitch who doesn’t take anyone’s shit, next character.

ASAMI

You know her, you love her, you fantasize about her and you probably have her on your list of fictional characters you would totally bang if you had the chance (I know I do), yes, even your best girl is problematic. It’s interesting to me that a lot of people sympathize with Asami and very few openly criticize her (so few that I’ve never seen anyone say a bad thing about her). What’s there to criticize though? The poor girl was cheated on by Mako, had her feelings disregarded by Korra, who claimed to be her friend but pursued her then-boyfriend behind her back and then made up for it by simping for her for the rest of her life? Also her mom was murdered when she was just 6 years old, her father threatened to kill her once and physically abused her, then died right after they started repairing their relationship, essentially making her an orphan at the ripe age of 22. Suffice it to say, Asami has been through it.

So, how could she be problematic, you ask? Why, of course, through the classic Bryke technique of romance progression in storylines called Kissing People Without Their Consent

To be honest, I did gloss over this with Korra, simply because there were sooo many other issues with that woman and I just couldn’t go through every single one in as much detail but that doesn’t negate how serious this whole sneak attack kissing thing is. Sure, Asami is very emotional and lonely and sort of desperate too, (it's a little sad, really) but Mako is clearly uncomfortable and completely caught off guard by the kiss. This is also the second time this happens to him in the series! There are a couple factors that might contribute to why Asami does this and acts this way, maybe Korra’s general awfulness rubbed off on her (don’t make a dirty joke) but this is still wrong.

AND that’s...pretty much it. Kissing people without their permission is a big no no, though. Not wanting to gloss over that, but Asami really is a good person who just did a not-so-great thing. Getting burned by Mako twice probably made her a little less inclined to be as forward with anyone though, and it looks like she now takes her time and is patient in her relationship with Korra. It even seems like Asami is the only person Korra is afraid to upset, as Korra does seem more gentle and calm when around her. And who knows? Maybe Asami living a life where a majority of the time she got whatever she wanted when she wanted it might have also influenced her to be more assertive or even imposing within her relationships.

If anything, those three fools getting into relationships with each other just showed how not ready they were to be in relationships in the first place and also how not okay they were.

BOLIN

Originally I titled this as “Everyone in the Krew is problematic (except Bolin)” but then I remembered that Bolin totally kissed a woman without her consent so I deleted the shit out of that!

This asshole looks genuinely pleased with himself after essentially assaulting Ginger. Not a good look.

Sure, Bolin is baby. He will always be baby to me. But that does not erase the fact that he also actively supported a fascist dictator. Not only was the kissing without consent thing bad, but there’s also that. No matter how many times people around him warned him about the fact that he was on the wrong side of things, that he was helping someone who was putting people into concentration camps...Bolin wanted to believe the best of Kuvira. He ignored obvious signs that the woman was a dictator committing human rights violations like crazy and you know, there’s gotta be a reason for that too.

Maybe Bolin wanted to feel like he was doing something good for once. When you think about it, with his role as the comic relief in the Krew, and sort of constantly being infantilized by his older brother, I wouldn’t be surprised if the man developed some insecurity in his ability to do anything good or useful for anyone without screwing it up in some way. In Kuvira’s army, it seemed like he was actually taken seriously, he felt like he was doing something that mattered. Korra had being the Avatar, Asami had her business and mindblowing philanthropy (honestly, her ability to be as charitable as she is profitable is insane) and Mako had his police work (ACAB, tho). Bolin had...the role of being a joke. A superficial actor. A former pro-bending meathead.

Bolin lived his entire life following after his brother that once they were adults and Mako finally decided to live his own life for once, it left Bolin completely lost. And lost young men are perfect recruits for fascists.

So, in conclusion, my whole reasoning behind destroying the integrity of my favorite characters is to prove a huge point. All of these characters are problematic. They have flaws, some bigger than others (looking at you, Korra. Just...wow), but ultimately, even if your fave is problematic... that’s okay. A lot of people, mostly younger people it seems, are really obsessed with being right about everything that they do and stan. And that’s a wonderful thing, so much change has come about by the younger generations calling out people who do fucked up shit, don’t want or try to improve, and get away with it. But it’s also caused a lot of people to be unforgiving and completely unwilling to acknowledge when people do improve and try to be better.

Personally, I love my problematic Krew because having issues that you’re constantly working on internally is human. It’s human to make mistakes, it’s human to grow from those mistakes. And it’s inspiring to me, who is wholly imperfect, to see myself reflected in fictional characters who aren’t perpetuating unrealistic ideals of human nature, characters who are messy, crazy and ultimately human.

As one of my favorite manga artists and queen of impeccable character creation Rumiko Takahashi once said:

“I think that perfect people are not very interesting.”

And I will always wholeheartedly agree.

#long post #rant #tlok #the legend of korra #korra #asami sato #mako #bolin #avatar: the legend of korra #back on my random bullshit i guess

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chainofclovers · 3 years

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Grace and Frankie 7x1 - 7x4 thoughts

Meh? Like...I love them so much, but...meh?

(I did enjoy this line about brunch.)

I really loved season 6 of Grace and Frankie. I thought it was well-paced, largely very well-acted, generally well-written, and it culminated in a massive moment of character development for the title characters, who, having spent years growing closer and being there for each other when others could not or would not be, finally articulate to each other that they are the primary person in each other’s lives. Platonic gal pal soulmate BFF emotional support witches 4 lyfe!

I know progress isn’t always linear, and in fact is very rarely linear, but after a moment that significant, you’d think the writers on this show would maybe come up with some more interesting things for these characters to do than spin in circles?

@bristler and I watched on Friday night, and just this morning over breakfast had a good conversation about the first four episodes of the new season now that they have settled in our brains a bit. We concluded that the writing (often noticeably clunky, like the dialogue is responsible for more narration than usual) and the tone (aggressively wacky) feel really off, especially compared to the prior season. I think we diagnosed the big issue, which is that Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda are by far the most talented actors on this show (if you disagree, fight me in the parking lot) and it feels surprisingly unfortunate that their characters have, to this point in the new season, pretty much figured out their perspectives on each other. No matter how people feel about Grace and Frankie’s sexualities, the whole show has been about them finding each other and getting in deeper and deeper, and it’s less interesting to watch other characters have realizations about that than it is to watch Grace and Frankie having realizations about themselves. If the title characters are now limited to reacting to other people’s actions, and the title characters are played by the best actors on the show, the whole show’s gonna suffer. And is suffering, very much so, at least for these first four episodes. I’m definitely still excited for the final twelve in 2022 (twelve! I cannot believe this season will have sixteen eps!), but I’m pretty disappointed so far.

Stuff I Loved:

The family brunch. These families have been entwined for so long, and the backstory for this particular brunch was so fun (even though I didn’t care for the effects they did to depict Grace and Robert 25 years ago; there was no need for a visual flashback in the scene). I love that Grace hit Frankie with a wiffle ball bat. I love that the two couples realized some of the emotional reasons behind their decisions to lie to each other about Bud’s Bunny and about M’Challah. I love the way Jane Fonda sounds uttering the phrase “Bud’s Bunny” with little to no irony. I love that Grace is able to recognize and articulate just how deep and miserable her anger issues were, albeit with the continued help of her omnipresent martini, and that Frankie told her she’d now make up a holiday in order to spend more time with Grace. I really, really hope Frankie does exactly this at some point in the remaining episodes of the season. I love that Grace is generally a pretty good person now, with aspirations of being a delightful person. I love that she and Frankie don’t have it in them to stay angry with each other, and I love all the evidence that they really, really talk to each other about everything now.

Frankie talking to the man at the office (I don’t remember who he was supposed to be? A toilet manufacturer? I didn’t mention this before, but I actually got pretty high while watching?!? Believe it or not, this was the first time I smoked pot and watched Grace and Frankie at the same time despite having enjoyed both activities on their own for quite some time. I would recommend the combo! And I think I still pretty much got what was happening) about paying for the toilet parts with candy. This whole subplot with the money laundering was absurd and not that interesting, but I loved this particular scene because it was finally evidence of some really thoughtful writing. The concepts aren’t enough! You have to write them into good dialogue! And the whole cash/candy thing was a moment of dialogue that only someone as hilarious as Lily Tomlin could pull off. Which she did, IMO.

In a show about super messy people, Coyote has stayed sober this entire time. He is sober, employed, in love, and preparing to buy a full-sized house with his partner. He hasn’t murdered anyone in his family. Hasn’t even attempted murder once.

In 2017 or whatever, Grace Hanson would have been furious about Frankie using obscure Beatles references like a treasure map when hiding the cash. But here in 2021, she cooperates and even gets in on the fun. The writing is very unsubtle this season, but that did feel like a reasonably subtle moment that shows how good of a partner she is for Frankie. (Platonic, of course! So platonic. Female friendship, amirite?)

Stuff I Did NOT Love and Felt Incredibly Negative About:

Brianna. I can only conclude that June Diane Raphael has decided she’s happy with playing a character whose primary role in life is to be hot and mean. She succeeds at being hot and mean, but I have reached my limit with this character. I realize we’re only a quarter of the way into the season, but I don’t think I can take another arc about her learning to compromise only to reveal to Barry that she never intended to compromise at all. At this point, it’s both abusive and boring. How?! The Grace/Brianna parallels aren’t interesting anymore, because one character has grown and the other is stagnant. I get that Brianna was raised in an emotionally stilted environment by two unhealthy people. But I think it would be very cool if she could learn something from her mother at this point. Grace has put a ton of effort into dealing with her “rabbit-killing, mad-at-the-world anger.” She’s put a ton of effort into figuring out what makes her happy, what she wants her life to look like. She’s even started accepting her age and abilities without shame. And that growth is believable; Grace is still short-tempered and she still slugs back way too many martinis and she struggles to articulate certain things, but she’s grown into a truly lovely human. And while, as a daughter with a mother, I can absolutely attest to the fact that it can be difficult and uncomfortable to learn lessons from one’s mother, Brianna really, really should. Grace spent decades letting anger and shame trap her in a small, miserable life. Brianna—and even Mallory, who just seems like a vapid idiot this season—are traveling that same path, but there’s someone right there who could really help, maybe even more than Frankie helped when the Hanson girls were first growing up.

The arraignment. The scene might’ve been salvageable if it was filmed from Grace’s perspective, and filmed to reflect how surreal and improbable it all was. But speaking of non-linear progress, this scene erased everything Nick Skolka has done to put himself in my good graces (LOL) over the past couple seasons. I mean, I tried, man. I even wrote fic about Nick, Grace, and Frankie making a genuine effort at polyamory. But the arraignment is so emotionally manipulative, such a slap in the face of everything Grace has worked for, and while we’re certainly “supposed” to feel the weight of the moment, I mean, it’s not like we’re supposed to be like, “Oh, cool, we’re in a rom com now! This is adorable!” it still felt bad and unearned and slapdash.

And I want Frankie to process these things with her! Frankie seems so happy to have all this information about Grace and how Grace feels, but I want to see scenes in which we can gain an understanding of how Frankie actually feels. Hearing Frankie talk to other people about how Grace feels is interesting, but it’s like there’s no room in these episodes for us to learn anything new about Frankie herself.

Grace’s transitional wig. Is so. Bad. It is. Such a. Bad wig. Oof. I mean, I like what they’re doing with Grace’s hair from a plot perspective, although (see one bullet up) I would really like to get more of an understanding of what’s happening in Grace’s head, not just on top of her head. And gosh, Frankie would be a really good person to talk to about this in a conversation that lasts longer than 30 seconds. But the wig! She’s in a wig in all four episodes, of course, since Jane Fonda went grey and cut her hair short before they started filming this season. The wig for episodes 1 and 2 is fine; it’s a good approximation of Grace’s typical hair, and of course we know that canonically Grace’s hair isn’t 100% her own hair anyway. But the wig with grey roots looks so weird. The part that’s growing out doesn’t look the same as the hair on the wig from 1 and 2. And the grey roots look like a yarmulke. I cannot wait to get to the point in the season when Grace goes all the way grey.

(One more thing about the hair. I can’t let it go. I paused the show while we were watching to rant, but I’m not done.) I had the great privilege of seeing Jane Fonda in person at a protest in 2019. She is an insanely beautiful human. She was growing her hair out and it was partially dyed blonde and partially grey. It looked really cool. I am not ashamed to say I spent that day learning many things about the climate crisis and about Jane Fonda’s hair. Having seen her in real life with her real hair looking that fucking great, I just have a an extra-large grudge against everyone involved in that horrible wig. The wig is necessary, but it didn’t have to be this bad.

What Do I Care About Now?

I am pretty intrigued by the way Grace threw out her real age in a conversation with Nick and Elena. She has nothing to fear anymore! She’s so chill about aging! What could go wrong? I assume that Nick and Elena maneuvering for Nick to be on house arrest in Grace's house specifically has to do with the fact that Grace is 82. She’s gonna find out that Nick is allowed to be with her because she’s ancient and helpless and the court took pity. Or something like that. She’s going to feel betrayed on top of feeling stifled and overwhelmed by Nick’s presence. I want to see where this goes for sure.

Other than that, and other than the fact that I really do continue to believe this show is moving in a direction in which Grace and Frankie will choose each other, I feel very whatever about this whole thing. I love this show and I will always appreciate this show for giving me some incredible characters to spend years of my life writing about, and for bringing me some pretty amazing friendships. Speaking of those friendships, yesterday @ellydash and @telanu and I were talking about some of the incredible TV we’ve watched recently, like Ted Lasso and Hacks and Fleabag and Killing Eve, and how great it feels to watch beautifully written TV crafted by writers who are profoundly—organically yet intentionally—attuned to even the most minor character’s rhythm. The disappointment of these first few episodes of the new G&F season feels like a mild disappointment rather than a sharp heartbreak, and that has a lot to do with being deeply invested in other shows that could also go in all kinds of different directions but with writing I fundamentally trust.

Also Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin are my forever faves and my appreciation for their performances and general awesomeness onscreen and in life is undiminished. So that’s pretty cool.

#grace and frankie #meta by me #grace and frankie s7 spoilers #a lesbian watches ted lasso #grace hanson is a gay disaster #except #she's not even a disaster anymore #she's totally fine and men keep bothering her!#frankie bergstein is a bisexual mess

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good-forthe-weekend · 3 years

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a Gwynriel post

All of first. No, I am not interested in ship wars. As long as my dear sweet child spy Az ends up happy, idgaf who he ends up with, and will be happy if he ends up with either Gwyn or Elain, as long as both women get to have their own story told separate from Azriel.

But. I do think that Gwynriel is adorable, and have taken a preference to that ship over Elriel.

Please, for the love of christ, no hate. The block button is my friend. This is a ship drama free zone.

Anywhoozles. Gwynriel.

[Trigger warning: SA]

I mentioned in THIS post that I think it would be neat if we got a romance arc between Gwyn and Az that involved Gwyn wanting to take their relationship slow or focus on herself. I kinda wanted to just elaborate on that.

After seeing a tiktok (and a couple tumblr posts) about people being presumptuous with how they feel Gwyn will for sure feel about being in a relationship/having sex given her SA survivor status, I wanted to clear a couple things up, because my original wording is just vague enough to be a lil problematic.

I don’t want it to seem like I think Gwyn would respond to her assault any particular way. We simply don’t know enough about her to know exactly how she’d respond, and I agree that it’s problematic to assume. When I say that I think it would be cool for her to want to take the relationship slow, I mean the whole ass thing. Emotions too. She’s explicitly stated that she has a lot of trauma to work through outside of the SA. She has survivors guilt, self hatred issues, and doesn’t feel safe outside of the library (which, by the way, I hope we get an exploration of how traumatizing it must have been for Gwyn to be abducted the ONE TIME she decides to leave the library overnight).

We’ve had 2 romantic arcs that are entirely entwined with the respective heroines’ growth past trauma. I think it would be cool and different representation to show someone who says “Hey, I‘m in no shape to be tied to anyone right now. I care about you too much (and respect myself too much) to get into a relationship at this point in my recovery. Can we take this slow and be friends first?”

Not that you can’t be in a relationship if you’re not fully healed from trauma, but both of them have some pretty serious issues that *are* things that would block them from being able to love in a healthy way (ex. Self hatred, Gwyn not being able to live in the present, and Az not feeling worthy of love)

NOTE: I low key want this story to be more YA than NA (at least with regards to spice), to squeeze out a lot of angst from the story, and force the Horniest Bat Boy™ to analyze his feelings from a non-horny POV. Make him really think to himself “Is this lust, or love?” Not saying I don’t want sexual banter/tension, but it definitely for sure doesn‘t need to be Nessian level fae porn

I also think that she would bring up Mor and Elain (because of course this conversation happens AFTER the whole necklace comeuppance happens), and bring up that Az has his own shit to work through before trying to be in a healthy relationship.

“You haven’t been alone in 500 years. Not really. You pined after Morrigan for so long, carried a torch for her for all those years, and the only reason you let her go was to move on to a girl that looks exactly like her, but who wanted you. A girl that you knew you couldn’t have. And now I’m supposed to believe that you’re just....suddenly over it all? That you wanting to race into this relationship is anything more than trying to leverage our status as mates so you don’t have to be alone? I care for you, Azriel, and it’s because I care for you that I can’t jump into a relationship with you just like that, when both of us have healing to do.”

Az probably wouldn’t love being called out like that, but would ultimately agree, or at least acknowledge that he can’t force this. So he agrees. They need to work on themselves. And they set boundaries. Just friends, nothing more. (This is, of course, exactly like Nessian and Feysand saying they want ‘just sex’. It damns them to feeling like they need more)

It would also be so bittersweet if this happened *after* they realize they’re mates. For maximum yearning and angst potential.

Like...imagine. They realize they’re mates fairly early in the story, but decide to stay just friends for now. So we get half to two thirds of a book where they’re friends, trying desperately to resist this bond, and trying to respect each others’ boundaries, trying to heal so they can love each other right. But they’re also fighting against the mating bond, which is exacerbating the sexual tension that was already there.

Think of all the Pride and Prejudice level sexual tension we could get! I think it would be less in your face than Nessian’s tension ever was (shit, they were never subtle), but I think there’s a lot of potential for stolen glances with intense thoughts, glancing touches, hand flexes, aching for each others’ touch, innocent training related touches that are just SUPERCHARGED with intentions, all the good yearn-y stuff. (All inspired by the romance novels that Emerie and Nesta give her)

I also think this could play into THIS theory I had about evil!Elain. Here’s how I picture it:

Az and Gwyn realize they’re mates

After a discussion, they’ve agreed to take things slow and focus on their own respective mental health.

They have agreed to stay close friends for the time being, and to continue to train together (well, in the Valkyrie group), and to try to keep the whole mates thing quiet as they can for now, just so no one bothers them about it

The IC has no sense of boundaries though, and it gets out to them because of course it does. Gwyn probably told Nesta, who accidentally let it slip to Cas, who she threatened within an inch of his life to keep quiet about it. But of course he didn’t. He brought it up to Az, Rhys overheard, which of course means Feyre knows, and long story short, Elain hears about it.

When Elain hears, she FREAKS. Silently, of course, but she freaks nonetheless, which leads down the arc that I detailed in the post I linked above

Outside of that, Gwyn and Az grow.

Az puts in legwork to confront his demons, accept his past (both Mor related, and his family history. A confrontation with his mother would be impactful)

I’m not entirely sure how he would get there (if I figure it out, you KNOW I’ll post about it) but he does come to a point where he knows he wants Gwyn, and for the right reasons. He consciously chooses her.

Not saying he goes from 0 to fully healed, but he does enough legwork to be able to enter a relationship without it being doomed from the start

(This should totally involve him talking to Nesta, the queen of self destructive romantic behaviors, and a development of their budding bromance. He’s always been one of the only people to treat her like a person, not a weapon, a threat, or a nuisance/pest, and she’s always treated him with a softness most don’t afford him. She’s also canonically one of the only people not afraid of him and his shadows. They’re my bro-tp. No I will not be taking criticisms on this)

Gwyn, for her part, has been leaving the library more and more. For daytime outings to visit Nesta, Emerie, Azriel. To train Valkyries (I like to imagine that the Valkyries will get their own camp at some point, or at least space in Velaris to stay/train). To see Velaris.

I think it would be fun if she started to offer singing lessons like Feyre does painting lessons. Maybe she visits Nesta (who started offering dance lessons in Feyre’s newly expanded Velaris Center for Community Art), and Nesta convinced her that it might help her heal if she started to give back to the community and share her passion. (Bonus points if we get a scene where Az stumbles past and hears her singing to her students, and is just entranced by it)

She’s still taking advantage of the services the Library offers (it’s never explicitly stated, but I can only assume therapy is among those services), but she’s coming into her own, and starting to feel more comfortable outside the Library. Starting to heal. Starting to create a life in the present and move beyond her past. She’s starting to believe she deserves a bright future.

She’s also developing quite the friendship with Az. They quickly become best friends, confiding in each other, leaning on each other, joking together, generally being there for each other and bringing out the best in each other.

Az likes to bring Gwyn lunch/dinner in the library sometimes, Gwyn keeps track of when he’s away on spy business, and makes a point to visit him when he comes back, little things like that, that show they care about each other.

Clotho notices all of this, and brings it up to her at some point, telling her that she’s going to have to make the choice to leave at some point, and that she can’t keep straddling the line of living inside and outside the Library.

Gwyn shrugs it off, and continues living her life, thinking that she’ll be able to put it off for a while longer.

Cue Elain kidnapping Azriel.

Gwyn knows she has to go save him, but Clotho tells her that if she does this that she can no longer live in the Library. That she will always be welcome to visit, even to work as a scholar if she so chooses, but this mission will mark the end of the Library being her place of residence.

(I don’t know what reason Clotho would give Gwyn, but on the inside she’s doing this because she knows that Gwyn is ready to fly the coop, and needs that final push to have to acknowledge that she’s ready to leave. Clotho also knows about her and Az being mates, because of course she does. Clotho knows all.)

Of course, Gwyn leaves. She has to save Az. She loves him. He’s her best friend, her love, her soulmate. Her mate. It’s a very emotional moment, and also the perfect metaphor for her being able to leave behind her past to be able to live in the present and chase her future. It’s used to represent Gwyn choosing Azriel, if he’ll have her.

Bonus option: Gwyn takes Truthteller. Grabs the knife on her way to go save him. Doesn’t kill Elain with it, but does kill some guards with it on her way into where Elain has Az holed up.

After she saves Az, when they finally get a moment alone, Gwyn reveals that she needs to find a new home. She no longer lives in the Library.

There’s this tender moment where they bare their souls and basically agree to be together romantically and help each other heal.

They acknowledge that the idea of becoming entirely healed before a relationship isn’t wholly realistic or reasonable, and that they’re able to be together even if they’re still healing a bit.

Gwyn: I think....I think I’m ready to move forward. Catrin wouldn’t want me to keep living in my own shadow. She’d want me to live colorfully again, and be with the person I love. And I totally understand if you’re not there yet! I’m not trying to rush you or anything, I just want you to know that I’m ready for this. Whenever you‘re ready, I’ll be waiting for you with open arms, and an open, healing heart.

Az: *shakes head* I’m not sure I believe I deserve that, Gwyn. But gods if I don’t want to prove myself wrong. I can’t promise I’ll be perfect, I can’t promise that we won’t stumble, or that I won’t retreat into my own mind sometimes. But I can promise that even if I do, I’ll still love you with my whole heart. A heart that’s only ever really belonged to you.

Basically, in my mind, their story would be super tender and sweet, and sexy in a much less brash way than Nessian, or even Feysand. Not that I don’t think there’s potential for these two to get kinky and sexy as FUCK once they’re together, but I just feel like their love story would be different. More innocent (at least in comparison to High Lord and Lady of Shaking The Mountain and Commander General/Goddess of Fucking In Common Areas) and more centered on their respective healing arcs, leading into them falling in love.

Like always, feel free to interact, add, tell me how wrong you think I am, etc. I’m desperate for people to talk to about these books. Just be respectful about it lol (and again, because it bears repeating, keep me out of ship wars)

#acotar #acomaf #acowar #acosf #Gwyn Berdara #Azriel #Gwynriel #Elain archeron #cassian #nesta archeron #Theory #headcanon #Rhys #feyre archeron

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blackfemmecharacterdependency · 3 years

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BFCD Reviews by Nesha: Final Space, Season 3

Everybody that know me know that I’m high class #Quillective trash and my main thoughts and feelings go out to Quinn Ergon and Gary Goodspeed - precious Gemini gems, and of course the BABIES: Little Cato, Ash and Fox #NeshaLuhDaKids I had some attachment to Avocato once upon a time, but that n***a got on my LAST nerves this season, so we currently at “Do you, Boo” status by the end of S3, and eventually, yes, I’ma get to why that is.

Disclaimer for somebody who stumbled across this post because of the fandom tags - I am an independent partaker of this content, not “part of the fandom,” and my audience in particular is NOT for everybody. SO: If you may have been criticized in the past for casual racism, tone deafness to Black women’s concerns or accused of misogynoir or antiblackness, leave now.

If you don’t like cussing, AAVE, general ratchetness and mean lesbian energy, you too might wanna go. A bitch can be eloquent, but I type like I talk, at times, so it is what it is and I don’t curate for kids, dudes, or nonblacks. That’s just what that is.

I wanna start with Ash Graven. This season is about Ash more than anybody else, despite the fact that there was a lot of emphasis on Avocato’s toxic ass man pain and growth in Quinn and Gary’s relationship, ULTIMATELY, nobody in the crew did more coming into fruition as Ash did, and I have a lot to say about her, because I have a lot of feelings.

♡ Ash Graven

1. Ash is a kid. Lol. Everybody got very confused because of the unnecessary transformation that Invictus gave her. Ash did not “grow up,” her body was altered. That’s a fuckin kid in a woman’s body. A kid who has previously been living with survivor’s guilt, parental abuse/neglect/exploitation, chronic trauma, and a disastrous superpower that most people could not be trusted to carry. She’s a child having a coming of age moment in this season that is mostly molded in manipulation. If you hate on Ash, go fuck yourself. ESPECIALLY if I’ve caught you stanning other characters who have been shit characters, in this fandom or not. Ash was dealt a shit hand and nobody had her back but her brothers, and she’s done what she could and thought was best to care for them. Anybody that missed that - just don’t have kids, K.

2. Ash has no parental guidance. As far as she knows, the only adults who have ever had her back are dead and the ones that she’s stuck with now, she GAVE a chance to try to trust them. She gave Quinn a chance to try to see some of Nightfall (the only adult that we’ve seen not exploit her) in her. She gave Gary a chance by choosing him over Clarence, when she had to make a choice. She even gave Clarence’s ass another chance - with which he responded by dying to not fail her. Now, she has Gary, who just a few days or weeks ago, idek, forced her to try to summon her powers while she was both injured and also upset over having to leave her brother behind - TO SAVE HIS GIRLFRIEND! And she got snatched away in the process and left behind with the enemy, to be mentally assaulted and returned changed, only to have them not trust her.

I love Quinn too. I love her dearly. But the facts were that she was dying and having an episode that nobody could really help with, and Gary didn’t take the time or consideration to think about the stress that he was putting on Ash by putting her in the position to make her feel like she needed to save Quinn for him. Whether or not she was the only one who could, that is a lot to put on a child, and not only did he do it, but he didn’t even seem to think that hard about it whenever he then left her ass. Sure, he was glad when she was returned, but that was a fucked up situation that yet another adult put her into, and the first thing that he should have wanted to do when seeing her was to apologize and try to make it right. It was a huge miscalculation to treat her as a potential enemy that he and Avocato needed to vet. EVEN IF that’s what she was to them, both of them should have had the sense to assess while still treating her as the kid that they supposedly knew.

3. Most of her trauma has been recent and continuous. She looked up to Nightfall, watched her die, and had a meltdown. The events from Season 2 (with Clarence almost killing Fox and leaving him to die, her leaving his side to help out, seeing that Sheryl was treacherous to her own son, losing Nightfall), and the events that are taking place in Season 3 are only in the span of a few months.

They were only stranded for a month whenever we see them surviving together. That girl has had more happen to her to hurt her than to help her and nobody around her BUT Little Cato has been sensitive to that. And they are all fucking adults.

These things being noted - changing Ash’s design was the absolute worse fucking thing. Aging a girl up to make the bad things that follow more palatable is what that seems to be. Ash is still a kid. And THEN, they allegedly made her a queer kid. I say allegedly, because that “reveal” was so poorly done and subtle and weak that I, an almost 40 year old queer, didn’t realize that that’s what they meant whenever they said that they were gonna reveal somebody as a character who is part of the LGBT community.

So... FS production just gon’ decide not only to transform her body into that of a woman, when her mind is still full on traumatized child and hormonal teenager, but also, she likes girls, and they didn’t even do it in a cohesive way that added to the story. They threw it in, like, “BTW, she likes girls, and also, she’s full grown now.” then immediately went for the “Villain” lever, and bitches just ate that shit up. Fuck y’all, forreal.

& Fox

He didn’t deserve that shit. And, I know a lot of people felt that he was pointless and boring, but his ass was sweet and caring and searching for love and acceptance. As a background character, I liked him. But, he was literally just fodder for Ash’s downfall, which was unfair and problematic, considering that his ass is definitely Black coded. Don’t play. He was voiced by a Black man, spoke with a blaccent, and definitely would be read as Black if you wasn’t looking at him and seeing an alien. They gave him a sacrificial negro trope, the big friendly negro that can kill you but loves everybody trope, and they used his death to just push some narrative forward to set up the one verified queer character as a villain. They got they ass in a vehicle and rolled right over another Black character, and another queer character. Chile...

♡ Little Cato!!!

My precious have not been getting some good for too long, and I have had it. He’s not focused on so much this season as he is in the background of other people’s stories, but a very important takeaway is and will always be that Little Cato, aside from Fox, really was the only one here who consistently treated her like she mattered, so it made a lot of sense that he could be the catalyst for her finally having ENOUGH with these people.

I really wish that he could have found out the truth about his past from Avocato, because that’s really who OWED him that truth, but Ash did the thing that I’d expect and told him, to be honest with him. She even told him that Avocato wanted to tell him and that she took that right away from him, because she didn’t believe he deserved it, and I’m respecting her for that, too. I wish she could see how much it hurt Little Cato for her to try to take him away from his home.

Little Cato has lived before, for a while, and he’s not mature enough to behave as a man, but he at least has a loving foundation to draw from, and having had that support, this is more of his home than it is Ash’s. He doesn’t know how to explain that to her, and she doesn’t know how to understand that for him. Just a tragic situation for two kids with a lot of problems.

♡ Quinn Ergon & Gary Goodspeed

Quinnary notes that might not be featured in the BFCD Reviews by Nesha: (Quinn Ergon/Nightfall x Gary Goodspeed) rundown -

I've had two favorite parts of this season so far and they're very mediocre things that you wouldn't think would be like my favorite part but they are. One of them was that the first thing Gary does when she wakes up is to ask her about her sister (someone obviously very important to her who he's previously promised to allow to let live through Quinn's memory and says he wants to hear about her when he's trying to keep Quinn from dying). Because... He really did care and wasn't just saying something to keep her.

Quinn's mother fucked her up in a way that is so frustrating because Black mamas really will traumatize you about their younger kids. That shit hurt. You showed your daughter dead bodies to make her think about that in the event that your other daughter might be in battle? Bitch wtf

Whenever we say that Black girls are programmed to put everybody ahead of us, that's unfortunately not just including Society, it's in households too. And Quinn comes from this place where that is her reality... Then she meets Gary and he doesn't even register for her as anything special. He doesn't appear impressive or incredible in any way... But he (admittedly) weirdly locks on to her and shares himself - thinking that he's showing himself to her, and ultimately he DOES. And he wants to see her too, beyond all this, who she is, at her most humane. He wants to know about her sister. About someone who mattered to her enough to have the helm of her trauma when she was out of touch with reality. Very soft. Very sweet.

The other was when they were talking about how they met and stuff and Gary absolutely cringed thinking about how corny he was when he approached this woman. A lot of dudes never do that. The complaint of earlier seasons that Gary was overbearing, obsessive and creepy , if you missed the fact that he has terrible abandonment issues from his father’s death and his mother’s rejection, here we have him, in his adult state, looking back at the way he was and being embarrassed about it, and that’s growth!

A close third is whenever at the beginning of the Season he says "Quinn it's been a month eventually you have to open up to me about what you've been through" and she says "I will in time" and he respects it but he reiterates that he's there whenever she needs him. I don't think that people realize how revolutionary that kind of statement is especially for a character like Quinn to hear - who has always felt like she had to take charge, had to take the lead, had to make the sacrifice.

Even when she realized that she was dying, she didn't want to burden him with the information. Not even like ‘a thing that she knew if that could help prevent it and she didn't want him to have to go after it,’ but... she didn't even want him to have to deal with knowing about it!

Maybe she thought that she would just drop, maybe she didn't realize that he was going to have to see her in that condition. And then once she realized that he was going to have to see her in that condition one of the first things she says is "I should have told you." Girl is on her deathbed wishing she had done it differently, for Gary's benefit.

I saw somebody on Twitter tried to come for her about not going to Gary after he killed Fox (you know, shortly after her surgery to save her from the very brink of death, and listen... Quinn comes to see about Gary when she can. She’s done it several times. In fact, I’ma make a whole POST about Quinn and Gary moments SPECIFICALLY to point out to haters in the main tag - where they got Quinn Ergon, and by extension, me, FUCKED UP.

Stop Playing in Quinn Face

HI! HELLO. ACTUALLY MY FAVORITE PART OF THIS SEASON IS THAT QUINN AND GARY JUST FUCKED. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THANKS. OK. Back 2 bidness

See.. after Gary and Quinn got over the humps of Quinn’s Final Space poisoning... everyone got it... nobody told her until Avocato was mad and told her during a lash out, and let me say something about Avocato’s fucking audacity this season...

♡ Avocato (Note: His name is A-V-O-C-A-T-O. Some of y’all be tryna stan and y’all can’t even spell his name.)

I done seent Avacata, Avocata... That’s not that dude name. Be writing whole ass expositions about some other Ventrexian n*gga. Hope this helps:

AVOCATO. Listen, boy. YOU decided to be a traitor to your people and your king and queen. YOU decided to dedicate your cause to the Lord Commander and lied to your son his entire life about killing his parents, raising him, and never talking to him about it.

Yet and STILL - whenever you had the chance to finally tell him, you ain’t do the shit. Lord Commander gave you the perfect ass opportunity - WHEN IT CAME UP, and even then, with that boy looking you dead in the face and being glad that now he knows everything... you ain’t Ventrexian man up.

Then, whenever you were supposed to be checking on Gary after his traumatic murder fight with Fox and Invictus, you turned it around and literally made it about you. attacking him in the process and only after a physical fight did you apologize. (And y’all still didn’t get back to what had happened to Gary, which was no real fault of his own).

Fast forward to after you willingly agreed to stay behind and fight and y’all lost. Now, it was Quinn’s turn to be the center of your blame and you lashed out at her because everybody is dying, despite the fact that y’all agreed to stay behind and fight, nobody even told her that y’all were sick, AND you still wasn’t 100 with Little Cato.

You just had a lot of mothafuckin audacity this season, Avocato, and I personally was not here for the shit. Even when Ash blasted yo ass, your main thought was to threaten to kill her if she took Little Cato, instead of assuring her that despite what you’ve done, Little Cato was safe with you. No, she wouldn’t have listened to you. But, the words you chose tell us about who you are and how you are. You a war mongering killer that don’t ever take responsibility for his shit, and even in those brief moments that you do, its always somebody else’s problem.

I’da thunk that LC getting snatched away would be humbling for you, but I guess you were chosen by the writers for minimal growth. Bye, Avocato. Witcha bitch ass. We is not cool right now, but you do you. Hope you find some growth up there in ya ass, where ya head been. 😁 Can’t believe I mourned yo ass. You coulda stayed dead as hell.

FINALE NOTES:

OK BITCH OK THIS FINALE WAS HYPE!

Let me pull it up so that I can liveblog it for the shit that I need to conclude this journey.

We start out after Ash done took Little Cato and burnt off. Gary and AVOCATO done said they finna go get they son. Chile, I cannot handle Biskit voice. I like that lil’ dude but ya voice, Mane. I can’t with it.

OK OK OK... Whenever Quinn comes up to Gary to talk to him and say potential goodbyes, she look like she wanna say some and that makes me think about whenever she looked like she wanted to say something in season 1 and didn’t. Quinn as grown a lot in her feelings for Gary, but she still has that hard time with talking about her feelings, but I love that you can see them in her face.

Chile... these folk was kinda taking they time gettin started, huh? Knuckas, do y’all remember that everybody finna die of FS poisoning? Lol. Also... why didn’t they start hallucinating and shit? I guess its not until it covers ya face?

NIGHTFALL. 😥 I love you, Sis. I miss you. But, “Because I’m you and WE think of everything...” YES. I HAVE BEEN SAYING THAT! EVERYBODY EXPECTS QUINN TO THINK OF EVERYTHING AND WHENEVER THEY DON’T THINK OF THE THINGS, SHE GETS BLAMED FOR MAKING THE TOUGH DECISIONS THAT NOBODY ELSE COULD EVEN MAKE. Underappreciated, really. And people still mark Nightfall as a villain, despite the fact that she not only sacrificed herself, but also came specifically to help another Gary. Sidenote - Nightfall didn’t actually pursuit Quinn’s Gary until Quinn was trapped in Final Space and she thought she got a signal from him. So, I’m still salty AF that she been labelled as a villain just because people don’t like her, when her actions have all been to try to help. Here is no difference. She thought of the things that she didn’t think a younger version of her would think of, and left it for Quinn to find. Nightfall be on RNS, and most of y’all didn’t deserve her.

Quinn’s identity crisis is so sad, but I liked that Nightfall EVEN thought about that. And Sheryl... you kinda starting to grow on me. I hate to give shitty mothers who find compassion in old chance a try, but she do seem to really be giving it a go.

Ash is so fucked up that she rushes right into the devil’s arms. This reminds me of when trafficking victims go back to their abusers because they don’t have the resources to adjust in the system. 😪 She REALLY believes what she’s saying. She really feels like Little Cato is safer with Invictus with the Team Squad. That’s sad as fuck, bruh.

THE. ACTING. AND. ARTWORK. IN. THIS. CONFRONTATION. SCENE.

Avocato... I’m proud of you for FINALLY taking responsibility ad opening up about it. Little Cato’s reaction is precisely how kids in the system are, as well. They wanna be at home with their parents, no matter who their parents are or what they’ve done. and Avocato meant what he said and did what I referred to earlier as “Ventraxian man up.”

“I’m sorry we failed you,” from Gary was so important. Because, they technically did fail her. Had Ash seen the same amount of love from Gary as she’s seen him give to others, she might have been more receptive to the truth and less susceptible to lies. But, as she had just said earlier, it was too late for kind words. She’s currently beyond accepting them from him. For a brief moment, it breaks through, but without that ability to know love from an adult properly, she can’t accept that apology right now.

H.U.E. with his big robot, Lord Commander...EYE. There’s so much happening right now bitch processing has left the room girl. Biskit did so damn much this episode. And it was good to see everybody on the team have a moment to help things, instead of like one person having to handle the bulk of things.

Quinn’s begging voice... its such a contrast from whenever she sent out the SOS in season 1 and was afraid and angry. Like... the desperation here shows her softness.

Ash’s RAGE Bitch...

Gary’s “I love you...” She looked so happy! And then she just sat with it. I feel like she definitely loves him too, but she doesn’t communicate that way. But, her FACE. She was just... did she think that he didn’t before, or was she just speechless because she didn’t expect to hear it? Because, we gotta be real... Sis probably has not ever heard those words from anybody before. And that first time, when it’s really there is a DOOZIE. She had an abusive mother, a seemingly jealous or competitive sister, and we saw how nobody in the Infinity Guard respected her ass when she was serving them the real. I think this is the first time she’s been in love or felt it and when Gary said it, she had to collect herself. The way she ran to him and jumped into his arms??? SHIPPING CRACK. And Mooncake was a part of their hug too. I have a lot of feelings about this dynamic since Quinn and Mooncake are the only characters that we’ve seen Gary have these “love at first sight” reactions to and Mooncake is the first character that I recall Quinn being nice to in S1.

So.. my heart was very full when they ripped it from my chest moments later. Mooncake has been watching Team Squad members be self sacrificing for a little while now, and he loves his family and Gary so much that he rushes straight towards danger. (Sure, I don’t think that he estimated how powerful Ash could be at this moment), but he had to at least consider that he might be caught or left behind.

Bitch, Ash is GONE. She said, “Fuck all y’all!” Not knowing whether or not Mooncake is destroyed makes it very hard for me to know how much I can stand this, but I also want to hope that he is gonna survive. Quinn having to make the decision to lightfold is hella sad, but even though Gary is destroyed, he has to know that this is exactly how Ash must’ve felt whenever he had to make the call to leave Fox behind. She hated to do that to Gary. She even seemed more regretful about it than Gary did whenever he had to leave Fox and when he left Ash. Sure, its because she loves him more than he loved Fox and Ash, but its a terrible position to be in to have to hurt somebody you love like that. On the other hand, they gave her hella shit for them not escaping when could have the first time, so naturally, she was going to make this decision.

It very much sucks that Invictus is free and my brain can’t eeem FATHOM what that means for everything and everybody, but the Final Space poisoning left the Team Squad’s system, so maybe there is a rejuvenation of some sort in Invictus’ power? Or does Final Space poisoning leave your system as soon as you leave Final Space? I don’t think that was clarified.

Anyways, I still don’t hate Ash. Y’all can say whatever about it, but I see sad white boys get forgiven all day every day on this site, and I’m upset, but I’m not letting my baby go. I’m not cheering her on, but unless she dies, I’m gonna hope for the best for her, like I said here.

DAMN this season was some shit. Ionknow if I’m emotionally capable of watching another season of Final Space in progress. If they make it back for another season, I will most likely just wait until the end to dive in and let them shock my senses all at once instead of on a weekly goddamn basis, because GODDAMN GODDAMN GODDDAMN!

@andromidagalaxie @daintyurbanprincess @shslargue @space-finally The Quinnary Moments Masterlist probably won’t be ready by Quinn’s birthday, since her birthday is the day before Juneteenth, but I’ve started on a little fic that I might have the first installment of posted by then. We shall see.

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Here is my JOURNEY during my first watch of the first two seasons of the show. (I watched Season 3 in progress and waited until it was over to write up this review) and my probably incoherent tag of whenever I do me a lil’ liveblogging: Nesha Watches Final Space, and here is my review on Quinnary: BFCD Reviews by Nesha: (Quinn Ergon/Nightfall x Gary Goodspeed) FINAL SPACE

#Final Space #BFCD Reviews by Nesha #Nesha Watches Final Space #Nesha Watches #Quinn Ergon #Quinn Ergon commentary #Final Space season 3 #Final Space spoilers #long post

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bjornthorsson20 · 3 years

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Chapter 2

Hermione Granger was many things, but patient was not one of them. Today, she had arrived at the library early to study (though most people would say she didn't need to, which was simply preposterous), and to help Ginny with homework, which apparently seemed to run in the Weasley family.

She was currently seated at her favorite spot in the library, the one furthest from the entrance where no one would bother her, and the library itself was thankfully empty at the moment. Ginny was late for their study session, and Hermione was beginning to think she had forgotten about it, but went back to studying in the hopes her red-haired friend would arrive soon.

No matter how much she tried concentrating though, her mind kept wandering back to a certain infuriating ginger boy that insisted on plaguing her thoughts as of late.

For a while now, Hermione was aware that she was infatuated with her best friend, Ron Weasley.

The first signs were during her second year when Malfoy called her a mudblood and Ron jumped in to hex him, which he would've done had his wand not backfired on him. Despite that, Hermione felt touched by Ron wanting to protect her, and that idea made her feel things she didn't entirely comprehend at the time. She knew even then that had it been Harry, those feelings would not have been the same.

From then on, Ron would continue to prove to her that what she felt towards him was different. Everytime Ron did something for her, like when he stood up for her in third year after Snape called her a know-it-all, Hermione imagined the same scenario playing out with Harry instead, and everytime that euphoria just wasn't there. She even remembered feeling excited at the prospect of spending an entire Hogsmeade trip with just Ron, then immediately feeling guilty for being happy that Harry had been left out. It wasn't that Hermione didn't care for Harry just as much as she did for Ron, but Harry was simply like a brother to her and, likewise, she was sure Harry viewed her as a sister, regardless of whatever mindless drivel that wretched, repugnant, heinous excuse for a reporter spewed into her disgusting, detestable articles. Merlin, she hated that woman!.

Hermione still remembered the moment she was hit with the realization of her attraction towards Ron in full. It was sometime after the trip to Hogsmeade, when the three of them were in the common room doing homework. Hermione was sitting between both boys, and she noticed Ron had sat closer to her than usual, though she decided not to point out that fact in fear he would get self-conscious about it and move away (she didn't mind the proximity, after all). She was in the middle of her "insert-Harry-here" scenario, when Ron's elbow bumped into hers, sending her back to reality. She immediately blushed and attempted to go back to her essay, though she only managed to stare at it as if she were interrogating her paper. She couldn't help glancing at Ron to check his reaction.

That was when she looked at him, as in, really looked at him.

She noticed the way his hair stuck out at odd angles, creating a messy arrangement of flaming red that she wanted to run her hands through and feel it slide perfectly between her fingers; the pattern of freckles spattered across his face creating a constellation-like mosaic on his complexion that she wanted to take a closer look at and count one by one for hours on end. His blue eyes (Hermione couldn't tell the exact shade) resembled two small bluebell flames which seemed to be brimming with magic the longer she stared at them mesmerized; the subtle movement of his facial muscles as he concentrated on his essay, the furrow of his brow, the narrowing of his eyes which accentuated his beautiful golden lashes, and the pursing of his lips, lips she found herself wanting to know how they would feel against her own.

And that was the moment it hit her like a ton of bricks. Hermione Granger fancied Ron Weasley!

The suddenness of that conclusion was so overwhelming that she couldn't pretend to concentrate any longer, so she quickly gathered her things, muttered a goodnight to Ron and went up to her dorm room, wanting to put as much distance between them as possible.

From that day on, Hermione would continue noticing things about him, like how big yet gentle his hands were, how his freckles seemed to cover his arms just as beautifully as his face, leaving some parts of his skin looking almost tanned, or how he now stood a full head above her (and he showed no signs of his growth stopping anytime soon, a fact that left her with a weird fluttering sensation on the inside). Now, Hermione had a hard time keeping herself from staring at him so much, and she had caught herself a couple of times on the verge of straight up confessing to him.

That was when the logical part of her brain would come in and try to reason with her why she shouldn't be so impulsive with her emotions. For one thing, she still had no indication that Ron returned her feelings, and it wasn't worth taking a risk like that, potentially ruining their friendship or making things awkward between them, just so she could find out what Ron’s lips tasted like. Oh, but the sweet temptation. For another, and this was the hard pill to swallow, Hermione had to concede the possibility that a guy like Ron would perhaps not be interested in a girl like her.

Hermione knew herself — she wasn't model material; she was plain, unremarkable, simple. Her hair was too bushy to be tamed in any way that could be considered eye-catching; her face was a little too thin to be called charming; her body shape was too slim to be regarded as attractive. She wasn't one to be superficial like this, but when analyzing the type of females that might hold Ron’s attention, she needed to face the reality of it; she wasn't a Veela, and she wasn't Madame Rosmerta. She was just Hermione Granger.

But it wasn't just a matter of not being physically suited for Ron. Hermione was also well aware that she was a difficult person to deal with; she could be overbearing, nagging, and unbearable at times. She tended to be very stubborn, and hated being wrong most of all, which didn't make her the easiest person to debate with. She had a vicious temper that could dish out the nastiest retorts when she was hacked off (not counting those days, of course). She could go on, but as Ron had so bluntly put it back in their first year, Hermione Granger was a nightmare. Back then, she convinced herself that her tears were because Ron had insulted her and it had hurt, and that was part of it. However, she knew now what had stung most about his words.

The fact that he was right. Hermione was a nightmare. She had no friends growing up before Hogwarts, and even after coming to the magical world, she still struggled to form bonds, to interact with people in a way that wasn't completely off-putting. Even her dorm mates didn't seem to like her very much, so she was still an outcast. It was baffling that her two best friends even put up with her. They were everything she wasn't; they had fun, they were relaxed, easygoing, funny (especially Ron), likeable. It was clear that Harry favored Ron over her, and who could blame him?

Then, there was the matter of Ron himself. Hermione truly believed that he liked her, admired her even, cared for her genuinely. She just couldn't understand why that was. Honestly, Ron could be so infuriatingly confusing at times. One moment, he would be making her laugh and having fun, then later he’d snap at her and act all moody for no reason.

The Scabbers and Crookshanks incident stuck out in her mind. Even though they had already settled that matter and she had apologized for it, Hermione still didn't understand why that had upset Ron so much. Ron always complained about his poor old rat, then got devastated when it was gone. It didn't add up, and she spent the entirety of that situation confused, but most of all scared for the future of their friendship (she even cried over it to Hagrid, for Merlin's sake!). Hermione had wanted to apologize sooner, but after the disagreement she had had with both boys over the Firebolt — which was another thing that contributed to Ron being hacked off with her, adding to the stress she was already undergoing due to her bloated schedule — she was just too upset and felt ganged up in both situations, so she held on to her stupid sense of pride instead of just admitting that she was wrong to let Crookshanks run free, even if it turned out that Scabbers wasn't actually dead and Crookshanks was trying to help them. The point is, they didn't know that.

Reflecting back on it, Hermione realized she had been very insensitive to the whole issue, and that maybe had led Ron to believe she didn't care for him or what he had. But that was the biggest problem! Hermione just wasn't good at being sensitive — she was far too logical and prideful to deal with things on a deep emotional level. Ron was the complete opposite, as he was much more emotionally driven and didn't overthink things like her. Just more confirmation to herself that they weren't compatible at all.

Oh, but she certainly allowed herself to believe otherwise. It hadn't escaped her that Ron had given her signals, however mixed they were, that he could possibly feel the same for her.

He had stayed by her bed in the infirmary every night he could after her Polyjuice mishap in second year, and, as she had learned from Harry after the fact, Ron had done the same when she was petrified. There was that awkward handshake they shared in the Great Hall after they had hesitated on a hug (she had had no problem hugging Harry, though). Then, the way Ron kept glancing at her and blushing when she caught his gaze, smiling shyly at her, or how his hand kept brushing against hers as if debating if he should hold it during their trip to Hogsmeade. He had a general caring nature towards her, making sure she ate and didn't overwork herself (even when they were in the middle of their big fight in third year), as well as helping her relax and have fun. He helped her with the Buckbeak case, jumping in to her aid without hesitation despite her still not having apologized to him. He also demonstrated possible jealousy and annoyance over Hermione's admiration for Lockhart (what was she even thinking?!) and Cedric.

These were somewhat weak points, she could admit. The infirmary visits, and his caring nature, are a couple of things that could just be brushed aside as Ron just being Ron; selfless, protective, loyal. These were all characteristics that defined Ron's behaviour towards everyone he considered important. These were the things that attracted her to him beyond his superficial beauty. His behaviour in Hogsmeade and in the common room, that might have simply be due to Ron being a teenage boy, and as Hermione very well knew, teenage boys were attracted to any girl on a base level, so perhaps it wasn't so much Hermione that was causing this, as was simply the fact that she was a girl (though she still found it laughable that she would be attractive to any boy even on a superficial basis).

It was a constant battle with herself over this. Her emotions would argue one thing, clinging to what little hope she had of something more with Ron, and her mind would immediately attempt to shut it down. It was a defense mechanism; she was just too scared of the possibility of rejection and wanted to lessen those intense feelings to avoid a potential heartbreak.

And then, the Yule Ball was announced. That seemed like the perfect opportunity for Hermione to finally get confirmation of Ron's true feelings towards her. He would either ask her, which she told herself would only happen in her wildest dreams, or someone else, which would crush her inside before she eventually came to accept it.

Well, the Yule Ball was now almost here, and so far, Ron had not asked her or anyone else for that matter — not counting his invitation to Fleur under the influence of her Veela charm, something she knew he couldn't help, but left her feeling jealous all the same, which her mind once again reminded her was baseless considering their current relationship status. Hermione had asked Harry if Ron had said anything about the Ball, or if he had anyone in mind already. Harry would look at her with an odd expression, before shrugging and telling her he had no idea. She found his behaviour a tad suspicious, but otherwise didn't press further. So, Hermione had been left to merely speculate on Ron's behaviour.

For now, Hermione came up with three possibilities. First, Ron already had a specific someone in mind but was afraid of the possibility of rejection. Second, Ron was afraid of being ridiculed by his dress robes. She knew how much he loathed them, and he had whined about it whenever the Ball was mentioned. Third, it was merely a combination of the two previous ones; they weren’t mutually exclusive, after all.

There was a fourth possibility, actually, but it was so ridiculous that Hermione felt dumb just entertaining the idea. However, maybe (and that was a very huge maybe), Ron did want to ask her, but was afraid of being rejected, ridiculed, or both. That would be a nice idea for her heart to cling to, if it wasn’t for the fact that Ron had no reason to believe Hermione would reject him or ridicule him (she had told him she didn’t find the dress robes that bad). She knew Ron didn’t have a lot of confidence in himself, she had told Harry as much, but surely he knew that even if he wanted to go as just friends, she wouldn’t shoot him down (the Ball didn’t require the pair to be a romantic one). If Ron believed she wasn’t available anymore, it’d make sense he’d be hesitant to risk it. But, again, he had no reason to believe anyone would be interested in asking her. Okay, to be fair, there was Viktor and he had already asked her three times, with her letting him down gently each time saying she wasn’t sure she’d go. That’d been puzzling even to her; why was Viktor asking her when he had dozens of fangirls starving for his attention? They barely interacted; she just helped him with homework, therefore Ron had no basis for any suspicions.

“Hey,” a familiar voice broke Hermione out of her musings. She looked up to see Ginny, having finally arrived.

“You’re late,” said Hermione, trying not to sound too irritated, only succeeding a little bit.

“Or maybe you’re just too early,” replied Ginny, sitting down across from Hermione, taking out her books and parchment.

Hermione decided to let that go and to focus on helping Ginny with what she needed. They started working, and after a while, Hermione began wondering if she’d get to interact with Ginny more often. They were a year apart, and as such, she already had her own friend group, but Hermione hoped she could call the ginger girl a friend one day. She would like a girl friend she could confide in, and talk about subjects she wouldn’t dare bring up with her boys. Harry had asked Ginny to the ball, and lately, seemed to be cozying up to her a lot more, which gave Hermione hope she would become a part of their circle soon.

Given Ginny very clearly fancied Harry, there was the possibility of something more developing under the surface there if Harry ended up infatuated with her as well. Now, if only Ron could ask-

Hermione noticed Ginny smirking devilishly at her, and was about to ask what it was, when another familiar voice from behind the bookshelf caught her by surprise.

"C'mon, mate, stop pretending to be interested in this. You're gonna talk to me." She heard him snort. "Immediate Transfiguration. Mate, you seriously expect me to believe you were willingly reading up on homework?" Hermione didn’t know who Harry was speaking to, but her immediate guess would be the same person who occupied her thoughts earlier. If this was indeed him, Hermione couldn’t deny it was a surprise to hear that he was reading one of their textbooks but she wouldn’t doubt him doing so. She knew Ron could be brilliant when he set his mind to things and didn’t second guess himself.

Suddenly, Harry stopped laughing and everything behind the bookshelf went quiet. The silence felt tense somehow. Hermione wanted nothing more than to go up to Harry and demand answers as to what this was all about. Ginny’s smirk, Harry’s position, having Hermione obscured behind a bookshelf; she was pretty certain that this was a plan for her to eavesdrop on some important conversation. If the person Harry was with was indeed the one she had in mind, she didn’t want to hear some potentially embarrassing secret and break his trust; it was just wrong.

And yet, Hermione couldn’t bring herself to move a single inch from where she sat. For some reason she couldn’t quite put into words, Hermione knew that whatever he was going to say, she needed to listen. The voice that spoke next confirmed her suspicions, but this wasn’t how Ron spoke at all.

"Yes, I was reading this book for real. Figured I could finally follow Hermione's advice and try to learn something to make myself worthwhile in class, saving McGonagall the stress and disappointment. But judging by your reaction, I guess I'm too much of a joke at this point to be smart in any way. I should've left it to Hermione. It's her thing."

Hermione was hit by a barrage of emotions from his statement, none of them good. She didn’t even know where to begin. Ron was reading up on homework because of her? She thought he found her nagging when it came to her reprimands. Hermione should’ve felt elated by that admission, instead of the cold chill that seeped into her bones from Ron’s tone. She wanted to get up and tell him that he wasn’t a joke, that he was smart, but felt like intervening wouldn’t be the right thing to do here.

She heard Harry try apologizing for what he implied before, but Ron didn’t wanna hear it. Ron didn’t sound angry or anything, and that should’ve relaxed Hermione, but instead it just made things worse, somehow.

"Why won't you take Hermione to the Ball with you? Don't even try to say it's those dress robes, I know that's rubbish." And there was the question Hermione now knew was what Harry wanted her to hear without Ron being aware of her presence. She was definitely curious for the answer, but given Ron’s sudden shift in mood, she wasn’t sure she wanted to hear it.

"You want the truth, then?" Ron now sounded… normal? Hermione hoped this meant that whatever explanation came next would be silly and they could drop it for good.

What she heard instead shocked her to the very core and once again, she didn't know how to feel about it all.

Ron… loved her? Hermione Granger? But… he didn’t think she felt the same way? Why?

Hermione didn’t need to think too much about it before Ron gave her his reasons. Hearing Ron put himself down like that hurt so much that Hermione had to cover a strangled sob that threatened to come out. Ugly? He was the most attractive person to her in many ways! And he was not stupid, he just doubted himself too much! And who gave a rat’s arse about him being poor?! That wasn’t his fault, and it didn’t make him less of an amazing person! Yes, he could be rude and vulgar, but he was allowed to be flawed! He wasn’t perfect, no one was! But his qualities far outweighed his flaws! Why couldn’t he see that?!

"I'm surprised Hermione and I are even friends; that she puts up with me when she can rattle off a list of all that's wrong with me, which just further proves I'm hopeless and I don't have a single worthwhile thing about me."

That wasn’t true! She always let Ron know how great she thought he was! Back in first year, she had told him how amazing he was for sacrificing himself in the chess game… right? No, he was knocked out after that. But she did tell him later… no, she didn’t. B-but, second year, she thanked him for defending her against Malfoy! Then again, he ended up hexing himself, so that probably didn’t count as a win for him. She let him and Harry know she was proud of them for killing the Basilisk. Well, Harry killed it alone, actually… he still couldn’t have done it without Ron! Oh, in third year, Hermione appreciated him standing up for her. She remembered… scolding him for it. Why did she scold him?! She knew why, because she didn’t like that he got detention, and felt guilty over it. But she could’ve thanked him, too! She did thank him for helping with the Buckbeak case… which they lost, leaving Ron probably feeling like it all meant nothing, and he didn’t help at all. And he didn’t get to accompany Harry and her in saving Buckbeak and helping Sirius due to being unconscious. Did she remember to tell him how brave he was for standing up to Sirius on a broken leg? Ugh, why was it so easy for her to point out his less-than-stellar moments but assume he would know when she admired something he did?

Ron’s next words would’ve made Hermione laugh if she wasn’t already trying her hardest not to cry profusely over every word. She was gonna rule the world? More like bore it to death. That whole “smartest witch of her age” always rubbed her the wrong way. What made her “the smartest”? The fact that she read and memorized a lot of books? Anyone could do that if they believed they could do it! Ron could be just as smart as, if not smarter than her if he wanted. It wasn’t fair for Ron to feel like he was less just because of a label people attached to her. Hermione felt moved to hear that Ron actually believed she would make a positive change in the world, when she previously thought he considered S.P.E.W to be pure rubbish.

His mention of Ginny made Hermione look at her for the first time since Ron started talking. Her expression was stony, and she was just staring at her hands with a vacant look, like she wasn’t aware of her surroundings anymore, only listening in to her brother’s words. Hermione could only imagine what it felt like for her to hear Ron speak so low of himself like that.

"Then there's me, honestly, can you point out a single thing you can say I'm good at? And, I don't want to hear you say things like "you're brave, you're funny, you're kind". No, I want actual talent for something." C’mon, Harry, remind him he’s just as good as us! Hermione waited for Harry to go on and on about everything he couldn’t have accomplished without Ron by his side. She was greeted by silence.

"See? Nothing. None of the subjects here, nothing in these books. I'm not good at a single damn thing that at least 10 other wizards can't do better. I guess there's chess, but no one has ever taken that as something serious from me. It's just a game, anyway, not a career potential." Ignoring her anger at Harry for the moment, she sat fuming at Ron instead for downplaying an impressive skill of his. It was not just a game! That skill is what allowed them to pass McGonagall’s test! Knowing how to play it could prove wonders if Ron were to pursue a career in the Aurors as a strategist! And he was not below average in magic; he clearly didn’t remember the time he knocked a troll out by levitating its club and dropping it on its head at the age of 11! What did Harry do? Shoved his wand in its nose and just angered it more?

But Ron still had more to say. She wondered how long he had been keeping all of this bottled up inside, and how much longer she would have to endure this without accidentally alerting him of her presence. It took her a moment to register what he was saying, but once she did, her mind was immediately bombarded by questions. What were people saying in the corridors about Ron, exactly? And how was she not aware of that? She didn’t think there were that many people besides Draco and his Slytherin bunch that said nasty things about them left and right. What was truly shocking was that they were talking about Ron. Harry wasn’t popular with everyone, what with his Boy-Who-Lived notoriety, but many people liked and admired him, even if it was simply for his status. And though she knew Ron tended to be treated as merely the sidekick, she still believed he was generally liked and regarded well. To hear that people in the school have been saying the complete opposite was mind-boggling. She suddenly had the urge to go around the school threatening to hex everyone that dared to speak of any degrading things about Ron.

Ron stopped talking. Hermione kept waiting for him to continue, or for Harry to finally say something. Instead, she heard Ron sigh and stand up, muttering something she couldn’t quite hear, before leaving in a hurry. Hermione wanted to get up immediately and follow him, but she just remained in place, as if binded, finally releasing the sobs she had been holding all this time. She let her head fall on her hands, as she continued to cry uncontrollably.

Eventually, she felt a hand touch her back, either Ginny’s or Harry’s, she couldn’t tell. They were saying something to her, but she wasn’t listening anymore.

She had to find Ron. They had to talk.

#ron weasley #hermione granger #harry potter #ginny weasley #angst #fanfiction #romione #romione fanfic #ron x hermione #multichapter #bjornthorsson20

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arkt-nehrim-archive · 3 years

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A Story in Spring: Renewal {2/3}

A chill, gentle breeze rustled pleasant ambience out of the surrounding evergreens, peace nestling the hearts of those who occupied one of many small glens hiding away between the rough, rocky terrain of the Northrealm's Darlan County.

Arkt remained still, relaxed with his eyes veiled as he peered across the surface of a still frozen lake- only a stubborn, thin layer of ice where the cold winds could touch the surface. He released a tiny ball of golden light to float over the little lake, joining many others to dance with twinned reflections on the ice, all to satisfy his idleness.

While watching them bob and sway of their own accord, his thoughts could not help but meander to his own twinned shadow; the woman settled behind him in a manner most of Nehrim would consider rather intimate, her legs tucked under his arms so her form was near flush to his back, granting close and easy access. She of course, remained well occupied with what had commanded her attention for some weeks now, the fruits of her labors showing clear as what was once scorched bone was now a beautiful set of feathered wings painted in clashing tones of iridescent black and silver; yet small, not serviceable for flight, but she had steady growth well in hand.

Wisps of gold and silver intertwined between pulsing circles of light as Lithirill remained focused, but her strain clearly showed. Much as she had been vigilant in knowing the signs of Arkt reaching his limits when this arduous process had begun, he too had grown wise to her tells. While fully revitalizing bone, and reconstructing flesh had been far more taxing than the simple act of regrowing feathers, she had still been weaving her magics for a pair of hours. She hid it quite well, but she needed a break.

He'd turn his head to watch her, a small unbidden smile crossing his features as he admired all he could see; the intensity of her focus, the fascination that never faded, the relief that she had made it well past the riskiest parts. His eyes fell to her fingers stroking the soft plumage at his shoulder, speaking gently.

"Hanging in there?"

Peridot hues shifted slower than usual to meet circles of warm gold. Cradling a wing in her hand, she tilted her head, letting her gaze drift back to the figurative sea of silver she'd not expected when she first saw them emerge from otherwise dark feathers. "Well enough." she replied, sounding more out of breath than she would've liked, "A little sore, given our arrangement, but I'll manage. I've only another row before-" He watched her sway a bit in place, the effort to speak and cast clearly a bit too much. He'd only shake his head, supposing he should be flattered she continued to be willing to push her limits- but he'd not let her do it when bereft of sound reason. A singular act of will fettered her spells, the myriad pulses of light fading. Before she could say anything in retort, he squeezed her calf, seeing the entirety of her leg shift up as she drew in a breath. "Too much longer of that and we would be trading places on who was tending who.~" he continued, the expression of entertainment growing on his face.

Overcoming the sensation of her spellwork coming to a halt so quickly, she settled his wing upon the grass and fumbled with her flask, taking a swig of ambrosia, eye twitching in brief disgust at a taste she'd never fully get used to no matter how hard she pretended to stomach it. To save Arkt the misfortune of smelling her breath, she rummaged into a pocket pouch and plucked free a bit of candied sugarmint, pressing one to her tongue and offering another to him. He only raised a brow, seeing her hum with a chuckle as she rolled the candy over her tongue a few times.

"And here I thought I was the mender, well within my scope of knowing precisely when to halt my machinations." she answered, loose fingers idly playing with feathers now mingling with the short, early growths of a Spring clawing its way from Winter.

Ignoring her overstaying gestures and teasing, Arkt decided to insist. Test a different sort of limit, more his own than her's.

"One of many things you've proven to be, yet all you'll be if these scales do not balance out between us is spent and miserable. -That- won't do. Come, take your deserved respite...Perhaps by the water's edge? Wandering deeper into the forest?" he carried on, pondering as he idly plucked at the laces of her boots before raising a finger in the air, adopting a playful expression. "-Ah-. I could carry you all the way back to the castle, where I'm sure a warm fire is waiting."

The entire offer was beginning to sound too good to be true. Arkt was a cordial creature, generous and open with her since the first, in his own mysterious way. Even so, there had been a boundary anyone with sense could read- and that was before considering all the legends implied, pushing Arkt closer to the threshold of a nameless entity than a man of flesh and blood.

Of course...He would not, and did not push that expectation upon her. Even standing before the very champion of Fate itself, did he only refer to himself as "a free man".

Swallowing, Lith wetted her tongue, wavering curiosity in her eyes.

"If you think the notion of -any- of that will do anything beneficial for me..." she hovered over the words, off put that he wasn't only engaging with a warmer flavor of conversation, but -instigating- it rather fervently; so unlike him, "...you'd be right to a degree, but the tone of the evening would shift rather drastically."

"Yes, that was something of the point in saying all I did~." he returned, tilting his head just so, wavy raven locks shifting to dangle over his face, breaking off the subtle glow around his irises.

The fingers at his shoulder faltered a touch as Lithirill leaned back a little, so obviously flabbergasted and growing stymied by thoughts of what could follow that Arkt could -barely- contain the laughter.

"...You -are- flirting." she stated the obvious in baffled amazement, daring to dance as she tucked her ankle closer to his thigh, curling fingers round his arm as she leaned precariously close to resting her chin on his shoulder, "...I'll risk the embarrassment in asking you to pinch me. Whatever brought this on?"

"You're quite lucid, I assure you." he returned, shrugging gently as he abided her closeness, resting his arm over her knee, "Gratitude? Inspiration? Perhaps it's even -delirium-. Much as you puzzle over me, my mind still balks at knowing without a shadow of a doubt that my -wings- are resting between you and I. That evokes much..."

Lithirill's lips were caught between that confident smirk and the rarer nervous simper as he trailed off, cheeks growing warmer. She looked akin to a hare about to get pounced on by a hawk.

These games of idle coyness had become commonplace from his companion, at least since the conclusion of events that had named her Tel'lmaltath, but she knew them to be just that, a simple expression of her nature that receded the moment it ever hinted at offending him.

They had grown closer over the weeks of her tending, but never once had it played out like this when they did dance their short little twists and turns around one another.

She had strode atop the corpses of "Gods". Clutching the forces of Life and Death in her hands as if she alone were the scale to balance them. Yet in humbler times, she had also been the withdrawn scholar, who took solace in pining over tales of fallen champions turned embodiment of untamable wrath. Twas a nostalgic feeling to be more the latter, quite too stricken to speak as she stared at the individual who had been such an entrenched inspiration to her. It would take another gentle pat atop her knee to pull her back to reality as Arkt actually half-barked a laugh.

"I expected some manner of stuttering your step Lithirill, yet as ever you exceed my expectations.~" he admitted, eyeing her up and down as best he could at their odd angle, "Are you quite all right? I feel as if your legs might give if you tried to stand at the moment." The flare of embarrassment had finally caught up with her as she blinked, scoffing out a laugh at her own expense. Reaching up to rub at her eyes, she showed teeth in an lopsided half-grin, the fatigue of the evening's work settling in.

"I won't pretend as if your accusation isn't dead on." she sighed in plain defeat, "To one such as you, I'm sure I'm -quite- predictable, toying with you as I have been. You'll forgive me if I continue to be confounded by you in the meantime?"

"Hmmn. I like the predictability. Knowing all you've achieved that I could do no more than gamble on or hope for, the certainty of moments such as these are a comfort." he confessed, "Though, I can do nothing for your rattled humors~."

"Ahah...Don't be so sure..." she hums along, continuing to play gently with his feathers, very much tempted to pull herself flush to his back as she droned on in a playful tone, "Well then, I suppose I should find some courage, lest I bore you with my -quite- uncharacteristic, girlish stammering? It's unbecoming, truly, I can all be feel the whole of Qyra groaning in disappointment."

"I happen to be thoroughly enjoying myself, if it's any comfort. Though, you could stand to get under a wing at this point, you're starting to shiver." he murmured, leaning that little bit closer as to let his hair tickle her nose, "Or is that the nerves?"

She scoffed, her eyes veiled as she turned her head up, resting brow to brow with him, "...Well now you're just -teasing-."

The seraph could only chuckle gently, nodding along, not missing the look in her eye.

"Oh absolutely." he near whispered, a lurching chill settling in his chest.

"...and what do you intend to -do- about that?"

He barely heard her, though the shift in her tone was still perfectly clear, a certain expectation slipping past her jitters. Finding the edge of how far he could dare to wander, he hovered over her lips a moment before swallowing, sighing through his nose and resolving to press a kiss to her hair instead of anything more tempting.

An apologetic smile met her fluttering lashes and tilted head as the air of their saccharine courtship turned to numbing concern.

"Nothing. Yet." he admitted gently, "In the similar vein that I am not ready to fly, I can guess neither of us are -truly- ready to do anything about this in a way we might not later regret. Curiosity plays us as one might a lute, to be sure, but..."

Just like that, Arkt was at a loss for words.

Understanding what he likely meant, Lithirill's thoughts drifted momentarily to how the seraph regarded the grave site of the woman who had changed his life for all time. That estranging familiarity washed over her yet again, Zelara's image overwhelming her mind's eye for just a moment before she exhaled away the sensation.

As much for his comfort as her own, she brushed the back of her fingers along the spot where his feathers were there smallest, near transluscent plumes decorating the edges of his shoulder blades. She willed the roused appetite in her to settle, offering an understanding smile, lopsided though it was in the touch of disappointment she let slip.

"No need to explain, Arkt. As you told me when we set off on this little task of our's, we've nothing but time; that goes for more than just your wings." she spoke, turning her gaze north toward the off-the-beat path they'd meandered onto to find their surroundings, "For the moment, we may as well return to the castle. It is a touch chilly, and I won't lie. I'll need a bath after -that- particular bout of testing the waters."

An empty spot of last-minute insinuations and the signal their dance was over, placing them confidently back where they had begun; Lithirill testing his boundaries and Arkt waiting patiently behind them, watchful. He'd join her again when he was ready. If she knew one thing now, -she- certainly wasn't going to be when he did.

~Fin~

#Vynblr #VynSpringEvent #A Story In Spring #Nehrim #Enderal #Arkt #Lithirill Andelthil #Post-Ending

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legobiwan · 4 years

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Whumptober #2

“pick who dies”

Notes: This got out of control. I was going to add an Obi-wan + Anakin section but I had to cut myself off as I do have other things I need to get to today. This is less whump than...a set of pretentious character studies with THE LINEAGE (including Rael) and an excuse to explore the trolley problem within a Star Wars setting. I blame my recent Hannibal obsession for what you see below. First part here, rest under the cut. Note, I am a musician, not a philosophy student, so allow for some creative interpretation here.

General Whumptober tag

Whumptober 2020 #1

~~~~~~~

(excerpt from “The Padawan’s Guide to Philosophy.” Eds. Masters Thrife-Foran & Ugaaalich. 616th e. Coruscant, 940 ARR. Holobook.)

Premise:

You are out for an afternoon walk in the outer regions of Thymilla, a moderately-populated city on the planet Ungar. On your walk, you pass by a set of hovertrain tracks, which branch into two separate arms - one an extension of the main track, the other a smaller offshoot which leads to a cargo loading zone, about fifty clicks south of where you are. (Diagram 3)

As a hovertrain approaches from the north, you hear screaming, the words of the driver becoming clearer as the hovertrain barrels towards the switch. The brakes of the train have failed and there is no chance of repair. If the train continues on its current path, it will kill five workers making repairs on the track. If you pull a switch, the hovertrain will divert to the offshoot, where it will kill one worker at the cargo loading zone.

Because of an anomaly in Ungar’s atmosphere, you cannot access the Force.

Do you pull the switch or do nothing and allow the train to speed forward?

~~~~~~~

“Your thoughts, Padawan.”

Dooku shifted on his meditation pod, the firm material groaning as he uncrossed his legs from the lotus position, gingerly setting both his bare feet to the cool, tiled floor of his Master’s chambers. The young man allowed himself a small wince with the action. Yoda might have been able to keep that damnable position for hours, probably days on end, but Dooku was just a few months shy of his eighteenth life day, and another recent growth spurt seemingly focused all on his legs made sitting for any long amount of time…uncomfortable, to say the least.

Which was likely why Yoda had had him trapped him here for the past three hours, running through one ethical thought experiment after the other, poking his literal and metaphorical gimmer stick precisely at each gnarled and swollen joint in both his body and thoughts.

To act - to pull the switch - would mean to commit premeditated murder, even if it were for the greater good. Hardly a Jedi-like action. But then again, they had been taught - indoctrinated, really - with the idea that is was acceptable to sacrifice one life for the lives of many. A supposedly fair trade-off, although Dooku had seen enough of the Jedi’s relationship to the Senate, had seen enough of the Council’s internal politics, to know that two lives did not necessarily hold equal weight.

But to not act - to let the train barrel through, to leave it up to the will of the Force...Dooku clenched his teeth. That seemed more in line with the Order he was coming to know, was consistent with the Council’s lack of action on Protobranch, when Sifo-Diyas had seen the calamity that was to befall the planet and yet the Council, his Master, had done too little, too late, preferring to allow events to transpire as they would, the Jedi only impassive bystanders.

What was the point of their abilities, their training, their place in the universe, if they weren’t able to change the course of events for the better?

“I suppose,” Dooku began slowly, coming to stand, suddenly not caring if he was maintaining his proper meditation position. The young man padded towards the slightly shuttered windows on the other side of the room.

“I suppose it depends on the relative worth of each life,” he said, turning away from Yoda as to not see the subtle moue of distaste Dooku was certain would cross the old Master’s face.

“Is not all life sacred, Padawan?”

Dooku barely bit back the dark chuckle threatening to escape from his chest. Only in the holos and classrooms and the empty rhetoric of the Council was all life sacred. The Jedi could do so much more, he could do so much more to change the galaxy and yet the Order allowed itself to be chained to politicians, leashed like akk-dogs until receiving command.

No, Dooku thought. There was no balance - not here and not in the Force.

“From the information you’ve provided,” Dooku said, ignoring Yoda’s question. He peered through the slits of the rotor blinds into the watery illumination of Coruscant’s night sky. The dome of the Senate building rose through the rain like an oddly-shaped umbrella, shielding those in power with its wide beadth. “We can assume both parties of victims are of equal social standing, being manual laborers. Because of this, we must find other ways of determining their worth, their ability to enact change in the galaxy.”

Dooku clasped his hands behind his back, daring to turn to face his Master’s displeasure.

“The question becomes whether you want to hold sway over the transit network of a forgettable city, or the imports and exports that may go off-world. Exports which might include valuable resources or even smuggled goods. Items which could affect the governance of our imagined city and therefore, by extension, an even larger part of the populace.”

“Which is why, in this case,” Dooku concluded, his posture straightening, “I would choose to allow the hovertrain to continue its course and save the cargo worker.”

Yoda folded both claws over his gimmer stick, frowning. After a moment, he let out a small grunt, his features now inscrutable.

“And see yourself as the final arbiter of worth, do you, my young apprentice? Stand you above all others holding a golden scale, you do?”

Don’t we, as Jedi, hold these scales every day and yet choose to ignore them? Dooku thought.

“Someone,” the young man replied, “will make the judgment regardless. Is it not better for the Jedi to use our powers to make such decisions?”

This time Yoda did let out a wet sigh, shaking his head.

“Dangerous, these thoughts are, my Padawan,” Yoda grumbled, gesturing at the meditation pod. “Sit, young Dooku. Much we have to discuss.”

~~~~~~~

“Your thoughts, Rael.”

Rael Averross slung an arm over the back of Dooku’s couch, sleeves of his Master’s borrowed robe hanging long near the tips of his fingers. It had been the third time that month Rael had “misplaced” his own robe, his Master’s foisted upon him in the wee hours of the morning, Dooku grunting something about “Jedi propriety” before shoving Rael out the door. (The things were a damned inconvenience, and made him look like something straight out of a space station ghost story, to boot. Was it so surprising he showed up to Dooku’s quarters in a state which his Master referred to as “half-naked?”)

Rael bit his lip, trying to not think of all the times he had actually been half-naked in the Temple. Those were fun times. Unfortunately, Dooku could probably mind read them out of him right now if he weren’t so concentrated on this thought experiment.

“Why not save them both?” Rael drawled amiably, scratching at the beginnings of a beard with his other hand as he hoped to distract his Master from any hint of his past indiscretions. It was about time, too, he thought. Never going to look my age going around all smooth-faced like a transparisteel window surface.

Dooku gave a small smile. “You cannot, Rael. Those are the rules of the scenario.”

“Rules,” Rael scoffed, picking at the hem of Dooku’s overly-fancy robe before suddenly launching to his feet, unable to contain his restlessness. The younger Jedi paced up and down the length of Dooku’s couch, grateful his usually strict Master was allowing him this indulgence. Not that Dooku had any problem sitting still for what felt like forever - stiff as a board, that one - but Rael was too jittery, too full potential energy to keep his thoughts in neat line with his body. “Rules are meant to be broken, Master,” Rael gave a swift chop with his hand in illustration. “You’re the first one to tell me that.”

Rael heard his Master let out a soft snort in response. Only Dooku could make such a noise sound dignified. “I suppose I did,” the older man answered evenly.

“So there you go! Blow up the train and everyone’s fine.”

“And kill the driver?”

Rael spun to face Dooku, the other man’s eyebrows raised not in condemnation, but genuine interest. It was days like this Rael truly appreciated having Dooku as a Master. Sure, he was as pretentious as any big-city Senator, a hard taskmaster in his lessons, and an even tougher dueling trainer - but at the end of the day, Dooku only expected Rael to follow Dooku’s rules, and not the Order’s.

And as much as Rael chaffed under any collar, he’d take Dooku’s version of the Code over the Council’s any day.

“I mean, the driver is the one in control of the train,” Rael shrugged. “Sure, it’s an accident, but the they were going to be dead either way once they hit those other bodies. Probably would go flying through the window and bash their skull in. This way, you save six lives,” Rael gave his best used speeder salesman grin. “Buy five, get one free.”

That little addition did cause his Master to roll his eyes.

“You are…” Dooku pressed his lips together, sitting back in his chair, crossing one leg over the other. It was as close as Dooku ever got to a casual posture. “Colorful rhetoric aside, you are essentially advocating for pre-emptive action. Very interesting, Rael.”

“Interesting as in,” Rael pulled a sour face, imitating Dooku’s proper Serennian accent, “‘And now I will assign you five Jedi moral precepts to memorize and write a five-page essay about’ or interesting as in ‘I will now have you learn the complete codified law of the Umbargans, whose entire military strategy revolved around non-preemptive attacks.”

Dooku chuckled - actually chuckled - at Rael’s minor impertinent outburst. “Neither, Rael. Although, I must say you have provided me the perfect means by which I may punish you later on.” Damn, dug my own grave with that one, thought Rael.

“No,” Dooku continued, “I merely find your stance on this matter to be refreshingly…original.”

“You mean the Council wouldn’t approve?”

It took his Master a full minute to answer, his gaze shifting beyond Rael, beyond the confines of their shared quarters, Dooku seeming lost in some memory.

“Hardly,” he finally said. “And that is for the best.”

~~~~~~~

“Your thoughts, Padawan?”

Qui-gon Jinn sat motionless on the small patch of grass, listening to the susurrations of the light breeze in the Room of a Thousand Fountains finger through a nearby thicket of Borto reeds. Across from him, Master Dooku sat in a mirrored pose, long legs crossed over the other in the lotus position, expression unreadable, his presence in the Force - or, his effect on the Force presence on the vegetation around him - one of controlled expectancy, a single blade of grass erect and ready despite the buffeting winds.

“We shouldn’t have to choose, Master,” Qui-gon replied, trying to steady his own uneven thoughts and emotions. Although he had been Dooku’s Padawan for almost five years now, Qui-gon still found himself worrying his responses to thought experiments like these would not pass his Master’s high and stringent intellectual standards.

“In an ideal world, Qui-gon, we wouldn’t. But as you have learned - as I have shown you - the status quo rarely measures up to our ideals.”

The status quo, Qui-gon thought. Code for the Senate, for the Council, for the Republic at large. That much he had figured out, had learned from Rael, whose ability to translate Dooku’s sometimes opaque rhetoric to something more digestible never ceased to amaze Qui-gon.

The status quo. The more years he spent with Dooku - with Rael, when the younger man was around - the more Qui-gon understood. Perhaps he always had a predilection to question, to challenge what was “known,” the dictums etched in stone handed down from the Council to the Council’s Masters to its Padawans. But with Dooku’s guidance, and with his own exploration of the Jedi prophecies, Qui-gon had developed his own sense of right and wrong, of how the galaxy ought to work in consonance with the ideals of the Jedi Code and his own moral compass.

“In that case, I would ask the Force for guidance,” Qui-gon replied, thoughts slipping back to the many hours he had spent in the Archives, poring over ancient holocrons. The Force had provided for the seers of old, why shouldn’t it provide now?

“Perhaps the Force cannot provide all the answers,” Dooku countered, as if reading his mind.

Qui-gon frowned, tilting his head. “Is that not what the Jedi teach, Master? What you teach? To follow the Force?”

“To a degree,” Dooku assented, rare amusement curling the side of his lips. “But the Jedi work in symbiosis with the Force, and even that is within a certain self-imposed definition of what the Force may or may not be capable of.”

Self-imposed definition? Qui-gon ran his hands through the soft grass at his sides, no longer able to keep that perfect stillness now that Dooku had so upset his equilibrium. Had his study of the prophecies not proven that exact point? That the Jedi of now no longer regarded the Force with as open a mind those of millennia ago?

“The Force is more infinite, has more potentialities than the confines of what we could possibly hope to study in a thousand lifetimes,” Qui-gon hedged.

“And so you hope to use prophecy to save these doomed beings?” Dooku retorted with a small wave of his hand. Ah yes, the hovertrain problem, Qui-gon grimaced. He had almost quite forgotten about the whole reason for this conversation.

“I would hope to…” Qui-gon cocked his head, watching a pair of butterflies flutter over a Byrsonima crassifolia, fragile leaves fluttering in their wake. An action - or a lack of action. If he saved one life or saved five. What would the repercussions be? How could he know he was making the right choice? How could the Order know, if not for guidance from the Force, in all its possible iterations?

And yet, the study prophecy of was considered at best, an esoteric hobby - at worst, a dangerous arm of mysticism by much of the Council.

Which is why your Master encourages you to think beyond the dictates of the Council, Qui-gon concluded.

“Yes, then,” Qui-gon stated, suddenly more confident in his answers. “I would hope to ameliorate the situation by using a similar mindset of the prophets. One of openness, wonder, and possibility - to find my way in this situation.”

“And just how far would you be willing to take supposed,” Dooku trained him with an enigmatic expression, “openness?” The word weighed heavy with implication.

Qui-gon started. What exactly is Dooku trying to get at here? Hadn’t it been his Master who had introduced him to the prophecies, to the Force beyond the dictates of the Code? So far, Dooku had not steered him wrong, and yet just as the nearby Byrsonima crassifolia cast a long shadow over the open grass, so did Dooku’s unspoken entreaty.

But before Qui-gon could cobble together an answer, Dooku seemed to break out of his trance, chuckling slightly as he got to his feet. He extended a long arm to Qui-gon, who took it without hesitation, coming to stand at his Master’s side.

“Meditate on the answer, Qui-gon. For now, I believe it is past time for dinner.”

~~~~~~~

“Your thoughts, Padawan.”

Obi-wan Kenobi shifted in the overly-large, overly-plush velvet chair which threatened to swallow him whole. He and Qui-gon had been dispatched to Barstovia, a little-known desert mining planet in the Mid-Rim. A simple mission, really, overseeing a trade deal between Barstovia and Ord Mantell, opening up some shipping lines of the rare fermenium mineral to the Republic. A wholly forgettable mission, if Obi-wan were being honest, except for the fact the diminutive race of Barstovia seemed to prize, of all the unlikely things, oversized, over-upholstered furniture.

While Obi-wan struggled with a crimson throw pillow the size of his torso, his master, Qui-gon Jinn, sat across from him, perfectly serene in his eight-foot tall, royal blue armchair.

“Well, Master,” Obi-wan said, words strained as he punched the pillow to his side with un-Jedi-like ferocity. Of all times for Qui-gon to pull out a thought experiment.

“The prevailing wisdom would say to sacrifice one life to save five - a utilitarian outlook and the most practical, at least on the surface.” Obi-wan pushed down on the seat of his chair, trying in vain to straighten his posture, to lend his answer some form of credence beyond his words. Inevitably, Qui-gon would hold the exact opposite opinion from Obi-wan’s, and while Obi-wan had often kept his feelings to himself under the guise of “picking his battles,” he preferred to express his thoughts while at least looking the part of an almost eighteen-year-old Padawan, and not some child stuck in a chair too large for him. He struck at the recalcitrant cushion one last time. “But as Jedi, we often prioritize a single being or beings if they hold an important role.”

“In the short-term,” Obi-wan grimaced suddenly, pulling an impossible second pillow from under his right thigh, “we would lose four lives over one, granted. But in the long-term, that single life lost might mean the eventual deaths of hundreds, perhaps thousands.”

“But you do not have this information, Padawan,” Qui-gon replied, a crease of annoyance in his brow. Obi-wan noted there was no accompanying crease in the cushion of his Master’s chair. “All you know is the number of beings.”

Obi-wan bit down on a caustic reply. Yes, I know that, Master. I hadn’t gotten to my point yet. But when did Qui-gon actually ever listen to him?

“Yes, Master, this is true,” the younger Jedi answered, Obi-wan impressed with the evenness of his own response despite his increasing irritation. “Which is why I would endeavor to save them all.”

A beat. a raised eyebrow coupled with a subtle sigh. “Quite the feat, Obi-wan,” Qui-gon finally said, his words laced with skepticism. “How would you accomplish such a thing?”

How in the world is he not drowning in that chair? Obi-wan thought, distracted by his Master’s impenetrability, despite the audacious situation. There was Qui-gon, halfway across the room, composed and neat - well, as neat as Qui-gon ever got - against the regal backdrop of the humorously-sized chair while Obi-wan floundered in a sea of crimson, just out of his Master’s reach.

And wasn’t that the perfect metaphor for their troubled partnership?

Obi-wan wiped at his brow. “It’s quite simple, Master. The hovertrain could be diverted, or at least impeded by a third party inserting themselves into the equation.”

Something in Qui-gon’s expression shifted at the statement, earlier annoyance now melting into something closer to concern. The older man leaned forward in his chair, for the first time exhibiting a pang of discomfort as he battled the voluminous material.

“And who might that be?” Qui-gon asked, batting at the tsunami of beige woven blanket at his side.

“Myself, of course.”

Dead silence met Obi-wan’s words.

Wrong answer, Kenobi. Absolutely the wrong answer. Disappointment was written all over Qui-gon’s body language, even emanating from his usually controlled Force signature. Obi-wan fell back into the chair, not bothering to fight the dunes and valleys of velvet threatening to overtake him, averting his gaze to some preposterously-sized side-table and vase. Hopefully, his failure to provide the correct response would be the end of this increasingly uncomfortable conversation. Qui-gon would assign him some reading and meditation, and let the matter rest until they returned to Coruscant.

But Qui-gon only peered at Obi-wan with a piercing stare, apparently not ready to give up on the exchange.

“You would sacrifice yourself to save the others?”

Obi-wan found himself mirroring his master’s movements.

“Isn’t that what it means to be a Jedi?” he asked, genuinely perplexed. “We are servants of the Republic, of the Force - if our actions can save lives so that Republic may continue in peace - “ Obi-wan’s mouth opened and closed, trying to form the words that would express his devotion to the Order, the Code, his own sense of honor - but found himself gaping like an Ithorian cuttlefish.

Once again, Qui-gon fell into contemplation, back arching against tall, bulbous pillows, brushing his mustache with a single finger. A minute, then two went by, the only sound the clicks of a nearby chrono. Over eighteen feet tall, the clicks sounded more like the steps of a lurking gundark than a timepiece, doing nothing for Obi-wan’s nerves.

Finally, Qui-gon broke the uncomfortable semi-silence. “Don’t be so hasty to throw away your own life, Padawan. As you rightly said, the death of a monarch may cause the deaths of many others down the road. But you cannot know how many lives would remain unsaved if you were to treat your own so lightly.”

Obi-wan’s eyebrows rose. That had not been the reaction he was expecting.

“But how am I to know when that sacrifice is necessary?” he asked automatically. Obi-wan would make that sacrifice gladly, although...to be perfectly honest, he would prefer not to die as a seventeen-year-old Padawan.

“The better question is how you can work to reach a more productive option rather than coming to such a dire conclusion.” Qui-gon’s voice softened. “I am serious, Obi-wan. You have much to offer the galaxy. Don’t let your strict adherence to Jedi ideals extinguish your star too early. Not only would the Republic be at a loss, but…” Qui-gon looked away, staring down at some invisible pattern in the corner of the room. “I would, as well.”

Obi-wan’s mouth dropped open. “Master, I - “

“Ah, Master Jedi!” A new voice squeaked from the gargantuan entranceway. “Thank you so much for waiting,” proclaimed the three-foot Minister of Commerce, Parhary Hatch, bedecked in a long, flowery robe whose velvet train stretched back several feet. “Please, if you would,” he gestured towards the tall archway.

“Yes, of course, Minister Hatch,” Qui-gon replied in his diplomatic voice, jumping neatly off the chair, his landing as elegant as a Coruscanti ice skater.

Obi-wan frowned, joining his Master in a slightly less dignified, but no less effective maneuver. They had been on the verge of…something, some kind of understanding, or at least a truce. Whatever words had remained unsaid between would likely stay so, the moment gone, the trip back to Coruscant, and then to a Hutt outpost taking priority over these types of conversations.

Another time, then, Obi-wan sighed to himself, following the slinking violet trail of the Bartovian minister and his Master into the long corridors of the palace.

#whumptober #whumptober 2 #obi wan kenobi #count dooku #yan dooku #rael averross #qui gon jinn #pretentious bullshit #the trolley problem #writing #the eternal struggle #well this happened #i did have fun making up the alien culture for the last bit though #points to anyone who catches the references in the planet name and minister name

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project-paranoia · 3 years

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Live Watch: Thousand Autumns Episode One

Oh wow someone got the good... guzheng? Something in that family of instruments anyway. They got the good music for that. And the animation is beautiful and beautifully synchronised to the clip excerpts.

And the imagery! The opening with the symbol of the Dao, and then main character number 1, Shen Qiao, all in white, in a fantastically and subtly ornamented outfit - I love the textures of the cloth they put in on the animation here, cloth and clothes textures are so easy to get wrong and they’ve done it beautifully here. I think this is supposed to be Shen Qiao’s original sect leader/zhangjiao outfit and he looks properly leaderly in it.

And this, followed by a closeup of Yan Wushi’s hand holding the ring of contention, and then Yan Wushi himself, very handsomely rendered in 3d animation - and again I have to voice my appreciation of the cloth textures. That’s actual subtly 3d brocade textures they’re rendering there, with the correct flow for how cloth hangs on the body, and the correct variances of light on the areas with thicker brocade and it is, frankly, very impressive. And they didn’t lose colour saturation doing it either, making that purple robe look suitably luxurious. The shiny hair ornament and one sidebang in white is a nice touch as well. As are the hints they set right in the opening that Shen Qiao and Yan Wushi are ... opposites, and complements, linking them back to the Yin/Yang balance of the symbol of the Dao.

So much love for this opening song it’s so good. Also going to be a pain to translate accurately with a proper sense of the poetry of it, but so good.

Alright episode 1 proper, 风雨欲来. The coming of the wind and rain, literally, I think. Maybe even the foreboding or oncoming storm, if you’re going for the feel of the term instead of literal translation. Oh. Oh that opening montage with the bird’s eye view and the fog and the high mountains - I was so taken by this scenery I sketched and tried to paint it at least 3 times. It’s a very moving shot. Also very much in the grand tradition of xianxia/wuxia, and also, even without a word, hinting at the traditional stance of the Mt Xuandu sect - to 出世， to remove themselves from the world to cultivate in the seclusion and clarity of the literal peaks above the clouds and dust of the world.

Oh. Oh that opening shot. The challenge to combat by Kunye to Shen Qiao. The.. subtle and ornate embroidery and brocade and patterning on Shen Qiao’s sect leader robes is so awesome. The wave motifs repeated in the 3 layers of robes, even on the hair ornament/冠 in his hair, the resolute look on his face! The closeup shot of the 山河同悲 sword - and what a name for it. A sword named for, if I may be excused poetry in translation - compassion and pity and fellow feeling for the griefs and pains and trials of the world as encompassed by the mountains and rivers - what a blade, and what a name, and what a bearer that would be worthy of it. A very good hint, at the kind of person Shen Qiao is, even before they have him open his mouth.

The contrasting costuming decision for Kunye et al is also very nice, hinting at the cultural differences between, say, the peoples that live on the central plains and the more nomadic groups living on less kindly land, shown in the different materials available/preferred - leather, furs, etc vs cloth, silk, cotton etc

And the fight choreography! So nice! The 3d animation works really well here,in that there’s no limitation to the capabilities of human bodies and it’s possible to really show in the visual medium the knock out drag down fight between 2 people whose martial - and quasi magical - capabilities are already at potentially mountain splitting levels. Not to mention also, showing that a Shen Qiao who isn’t being handicapped by sabotage... really can wipe the floor with Kunye if he wants to. And then, of course, once the fight gets to Half-step Peak and they’re out of sight of inconvenient witnesses, the signal for the ambush. And then the effects of the sabotage take hold.

Ah, flashback to 20 years ago, to provide the audience with the world info we need to understand the rest of the story. Not to mention also informing us why Hulugu would even bother. Or why Kunye coming in to challege Shen Qiao is so narratively important. And also introducing the ring that so many would fight over later.

Yan Wushi’s character introduction.. is quite something. As is Yu Shengyan’s. Ah, Shizun, congratulations on exiting your 10 year cultivation seclusion, would you like the highlights on the changes in the world in the past 10 years? But also a good show of character, because they have him not even looking at Yu Shengyan, but looking away in the distance, and telling him to only tell the most important bits, he’s not interested in useless words. Also serves as a nice introduction to some people who’ll be important later, and giving us a time marker for when Shen Qiao ascended to the sect leader post - 5 years ago, after the death of his shizun Qi Fengge. Ah Yan Wushi, your characteristically arrogant attitude - aside from Qi Fengge, who in life was worthy of being the first among all the wuxia world, the rest are not worth even mentioning. And here too a little hint that Yan Wushi might care a little bit in some way for those who are his, including his disciples - He tells Yu Shengyan that this location, this Half Step Peak that they’re at, because of its physical characteristics, is good for him to cultivate to the next level of understanding/enlightenment of the martial arts used by Huanyue Sect.

I love it whenever they hint that the more... developed characters whose martial arts are very good have improved senses. A little flow of blood in the water, Yu Shengyan notices something is wrong, looks at his shizun, and receives a nod of affirmation that he perceived correctly and should take action. And then after that, they come upon a body of one of the Mt Xuandu disciples, and Yan Wushi’s verbal remark that today, Mt Xuandu is troubled and not pure and clean. And then Shen Qiao literally falls from the cliff top - and the pan up makes it very clear that for most people, this is a lethal fall.

And then the surviving ambushers attempt to finish the job when Yu Shengyan checks whether Shen Qiao is still alive... and Yan Wushi takes the training opportunity when he sees it, and tells his disciple to use his strongest techniques to take on the remaining assassins. And then, when Yu Shengyan can't quite wipe the floor with them... criticizes his lack of growth, as might be expected of Yan Wushi, and steps in to really wipe the floor with the assassins, as might not be expected of Yan Wushi. Also doubles as a really nice display to the audience of his level of strength. In fact.. listening to the voice, I think one of those assassins appears, unhidden, in later episodes. Heh. Plot continuity, a nice one. As are the assassins having common sense, recognising Yan Wushi's infamous technique, and running before they're cut down.

Ahahahaha yes Yu Shengyan, your shizun really had you pick that fight for training, and he's really about to pick up Shen Qiao and have him rescued on a whim. Also nice to review, on rewatch for the details, that part of this whim is perhaps curiousity as to Shen Qiao's ability to survive and/or recover, as hinted by the thin thread of strength provided by the Zhuyang Ce, that Yan Wushi identifies as the thin strength keeping him alive, despite the aforementioned lethal fall.

Heh. Yu Shengyan – and maybe Huanyue Sect's other job – information gatherers aka spies.

Ah, Yan Wushi, you really are fascinated by people's reactions under stress, aren't you.

Shen Qiao awakens! Oof, the amount of damage – can't see, amnesia – damaged or even broken meridians – the donghua doesn't mention how much time passes, but given that Yu Shengyan mentions that Shen Qiao's broken bones have only just finished healing – could not have been a matter of days. Weeks, maybe even a month, minimum. Unless Yu Shengyan meant that the bones have only just been set – which could mean a few days. And then the mindscrew from Yan Wushi, telling poor amnesiac Shen Qiao that, yes, your name is Shen Qiao, oh, and you are one of my disciples from Huanyue Sect! Someone sure is hasty to put his poke the injured person plans into action! Ah Yan Wushi, if you could please give Shen Qiao a break, he just had a near death experience! But also – the scope of the injuries – yes, it benefits Yan Wushi's plotting but also – Shen Qiao was injured beyond the scope of ordinary medicine? Yu Shengyan has to be stationed to basically care for him until he is able to awaken – and presumably recover – appropriately!

Alright, time marker, 3 months after previous events.. okay. Shen Qiao can walk, some, though the animators were careful to make it a clearly pained walk, in comparison to how he was moving pre-Kunye fight. And then of course the blindness, which may also explain how they've animated him moving with more cautious steps. And the coughing, and the eyes that can't focus – all in all, a detailed and careful show of how badly injured Shen Qiao still is. Can't help sniggering at every 'shidi' I'm hearing him say though. And Yu Shengyan... yes, really, even though you and your shizun can't quite believe it, there really is a person this kind and considerate of other people.

The appearance of the weiqi board motif! Strategy, and planning, and part of the arts of the refined gentlemen..and the hint of how Shen Qiao is perceiving/visualising the input that he hears, since he can't see right now. And the hint that he might be using qi to help sort through what he hears – well enough that he can identify it's a weiqi board, and even the piece being placed. Very Awesome. Especially when they show Yan Wushi possibly testing Shen Qiao's capability to perceive the world around him by hesitating and purposely not putting down his piece.. and Shen Qiao very naturally picking up the piece – black, the correct colour and the one Yan Wushi was about to play – and putting it in the correct position on the board that Yan Wushi was about to place. Is it any wonder that the next thing Yan Wushi checks is the state of his recovery?

And then we have Yan Wushi's characteristic multipronged planning – creating trouble for Hehuan sect, training for Yu Shengyan, testing opportunity for Shen Qiao. Very excellent, any and every outcome has benefit to Yan Wushi.

Ah the encounter at the medicine shop. Hm. Okay, the sharing of the medicine is clearly a hint to Yan Ziwen of some kind that he and his should be especially cautious tonight, perhaps even to run for their lives tonight. Though it's maybe a hint in the actions, and not the words, because the words don't sound suspicious at all. Neither do the actions, if you were watching as a observer and didn't know Yan Ziwen's paranoid character – a blind person would unsurprisingly wish to be extra careful where they put their hands. And at night, on the attack... for all that Shen Qiao can't quite see, and is currently relying on the rest of his senses... he can tell that something's off about Yu Shengyan's actions. And then... Shen Qiao remembers... the sword, and what Qi Fengge taught him. And then the confrontation, and the near strangulation by Yan Wushi... Shen Qiao has such a nice literary register to his speech. Four word phrases even under severe near strangled stress, with the right philosophical meaning to make his point to Yan Wushi. And then the reveal of Yan Wushi's plotting. Very nicely done.

And now, the first of Yan Wushi's many many invitations to Shen Qiao to forsake his daoist path and join Yan Wushi's ... evil sect is not the right word. Demonic path is technically correct but has moral overtones that don't fit. Join Yan Wushi's cultivation path, maybe. Join and get bloody revenge on everyone who's wronged Shen Qiao – and already there are so many of them. And we the audience wonder for half a second – is he going to do it? Is this going to be a revenge story? And Shen Qiao flat out refuses in words, in the first of many times. And then Shen Qiao walks away from Yan Wushi. Here the animation is a delight again – the audience gets to see the little micro expressions that flit across – he's actually walking away?! And then Yan Wushi does his dramatic gifting of the bamboo stick. And too, a few seconds later, the reveal of their movements being spied on by Duan Wenyang, and Yu Shengyan's orders to continue searching for .. something. Ah, the plotting in Thousand Autumns. Always a delight.

#山河剑心 #thousand autumns

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mnemehoshiko · 4 years

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STAR WARS INTO DARKNESS

A (Salt) Review of Star Wars Episode 9: The Rise of Skywalker.

Warning 1: All opinions are mine and no one (sadly) paid me for them.

Warning 2: I’m going to strive to be charitable as possible. Keyword, STRIVE.

It finally came. The conclusion to the Skywalker Saga, a nine film series starting with Shmi Skywalker and her lineage.

When we left the The Last Jedi; Finn was tenderly checking up on Rose who endangered her life to save him. Steadily finding his place in the Resistance and deciding that it was a cause worth fighting for. Ben Solo, also known to the galaxy as Kylo Ren, has just killed his life long abuser but failed to relinquish himself from the ties of the past. Rey was dealing with detaching herself from the idea that she needed to Be Someone in Order to Do Something only to realise that she, a nobody, was good enough. As Leia Organa said, we have all we need.

Cool right?

Yeah, just forget that movie. Actually, just forget like any development that occurred over the last two movies. Furthermore, turn your brain off. No, really please remove any kind of higher cognitive function and any knowledge of Star Wars beyond “pew, pew, pew” and “wOOO”. That’s literally the only way to truly enjoy this film.

This movie is a quest. A long big-budget multi-step fetch quest. Fetch quests are a common part of RPGs and can be enjoyable! Add to the narrative! Interactive. A movie that is nothing but fetch quest after fetch quest to the point that honestly, the first two thirds of the movie could have been dropped because it was so distressingly nonsensical.

Loose summary;

Ben Solo is on a planet. Being very very lorge and murking people left and right. Why? Because reasons. That this planet happens to be Mustafar and that he’s killing Vader Cultists evidently is not considered relevant. Even though Ben Solo introduction in TFA, which JJ wrote (with the assistance of Kasdan and Arndt), is basically as Vader’s #1 fanboy. But who cares about narrative information when you have sweet sweet red lighting and like a flight scene.

Anyway, Ben heads to Exegol because evidently that’s where the fancy schmancy totally Not A Holocron is directing him towards. In which he approaches some goth-esque temple with vats of Snokes. Yes, You Heard Correctly, Vats of Snokes. And Palpatine. Who’s just hanging on a crane. Just chillin’ and gleefully tells Ben Solo that he’s been every voice in his head since birth. So learning your abuser is still alive is totally dope. But hey, PALPATINE IS BACK! REMEMBER PALPATINE? ISN’T THAT COOL, yells JJ Terrio desperately trying to like Hype You Up And Remind You Of The Star Wars of Their Childhood.

Finn and Poe “I Have Literally No Purpose To Any of This Narrative and JJ Terrio is About to Fuck Over My Backstory” Dameron are getting data from a contact. For some reason a glorified dick-shaped Alien is there. Consequently, this is the same alien that replaced Rose Tico on merchandise. A reasonable person with minimal brain function would assume it’s because he plays a critical role in the plot. Remember what I said about thinking? Stop it. Klaud is there primarily for you to admire that JJ’s tentacle kink is Alive and Well and Thus Everything Is True (tm) Star Wars Again.

Rey is floating surrounded by rocks because That’s What Cool Jedi Do. Then she does a training course because after two films we have absolutely no proof that she has any fight training, according to Reddit and like JJ Terrio is trying to get Reddit to go to the Star Wars Prom with them. So, we need a training montage and Rey going to robo-Leia and saying that she will “earn [Leia’s] brother’s saber”. Why would she want to earn a grumpy curmudgeon who fucked over his only nephew and hid from his twin sister for years? Well, JJ Terrio dreamed of earning Luke’s saber and like what is the purpose of writing other than Wish Fulfillment.

Palpatine is back! Why? We don’t know and we don’t even know what he said because evidently it was decided that it belonged in Fortnite...instead of the film. Why? Here’s a lollipop and a pew pew to stop thinking sweetie. Either way he’s on Exegol and Rey saw notes scribbled in the margins that you need a Sith Holocro-- I mean ~Sith Wayfinder~ --because JJ has never seen Star Wars since he saw it in the theaters in 1983-- to get there. Which is on Pasaana.

WHICH IS HAVING SPACE BURNING MAN RIGHT NOW! (which happens every forty two years. Which is how long ago Star Wars Episode 4 Premiered. Remember fans! Isn’t that a Cool Thing To Drop? says JJ Terrio deftly skimming Reddit in order to gain fanbros love and affection and nostalgia boners.) LOOK AT ALL THE ALIENS DOING THE SPACE MACARENA! Because WOO DON’T YOU LOVE PARTY SCENES?

The force bond shows up and you can some how transfer stuff between the bond? Which like in the hands of another writer would be fascinating and engaging. Sadly, this is a JJ Terrio production and nuanced storytelling and dialogue is Fake and Not Star Wars.

Either way, Ben knows that they’re there and they are running from stormtroopers RIGHT INTO LANDO CALRISSIAN,-- remember him? goes JJ Terrio. You remember Lando right?. I do, I go. I’ve seen the movies and you’ve given no reason why Finn and Rey would know who the fuck he is seeing how he’s evidently been living as a hermit In The Same Outfit for over a decade. (BUT REMEMBER HIM, whines J.J. Terrio. Yes, I do. I SAW THE FUCKING OT JJ).

Anyway, more exposition occurs because JJ Terrio has no understanding how visual language works and it detracts from Real Star Wars Things Like - Space Chases - Pew Pew - Witty quips! because Witty quips! Are Important for A Star Wars, says JJ Terrio.

Nevermind that stormtroopers could fly since the Clone Wars and there’s literally no reason as to why Finn would not know this but like that would require you to give him

- a character arc - character growth - dialogue beyond “WOOOOO” and “REYYYYYY” (also side notes; it was depressing as fuck seeing Finn’s growth in TLJ to going beyond being Rey-centric to only spend the entire movie yelling a White Lady’s Name. I GO TO THE THEATRE TO NOT SEE REALITY, JJ.)

JJ Terrio: BUT HE’S FORCE SENSITIVE?? me, who’s been on the Finn is Force Sensitive Train since TFA: AND YOU DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WITH IT AND IMPLIED THAT IT WAS ONLY REASON HE WAS ABLE TO FIGHT THE STORMTROOPER PROGRAMMING??? (i.e. this is really fucking gross eugenics shit pls stop JJ Terrio and like just stop)

*deep breath*

ANYWAY, where was I? Oh yeah, Star Wars Into Darkness.

Either way, they find the Subtle Knife a Sith dagger? Along with force healing foreshadowing. But they have a dagger! Which They Can’t Read! But Threepio can! But He Can’t Say It Out Loud Because His Programming Forbids It.

And then the KoR, the galatic boy band, and Ben show up because of course. And they capture Chewie and put him on a transport.

Rey, of course, reaches out to Stop The Transport.

Ben, tries to stop her.

They to a back and forth that is similar to TLJ without any of the emotional build up of TLJ but that’s because JJ Terrio believes Emotions Are Not Star Wars.

And she lets loose LIGHTNING and makes the transport blow up and she believes Chewie is dead. Problem: Chewie isn’t dead. Which means she would be able to sense him in the Force. “But Mneme”, you say, “the Force isn’t like a GPS where you just Sense People.” That’s fair! Except....then...she does...when she’s on the Snow Planet. So like???

Either way, we have a Dagger that We Need to Read That Threepio Can’t Say Out Loud.

A Solution That Uses Braincells: well we know that the Millenium Falcon has three droid brains! So like we could just hook up Threepio to like the Falcon and transmit the codes and get some really great Easter eggs re: the Falcon and like the setup of the ship!

....

JJ Terrio: OR WE COULD GO TO THIS SNOW PLANET me: wha-- JJ Terrio: SNOW PLANET WHERE POE DAMERON RAN SPICE me: did you just make....your Only Latino Character Into A---Drug Runner JJ Terrio: REMEMBER HAN SOLO?? HE’S JUST LIKE HIM!!! me: pls stawp pls, I’m begging you stawp JJ Terrio: ALSO LOOK AT HIM FLIRTING WITH A GIRL SO HE’S LIKE OBVIOUSLY STRAIGHT me: bi....people.....exist...like...that is...a thing JJ TERRIO: ALSO WE’LL SHOW U HER EYES TO SHOW THAT SHE’S HUMAN AND NOT A WEIRD ALIEN BECAUSE POE DAMERON IS A RED BLOODED AMERICAN LIKE REDDIT me: pls....stop...why....

anyway, he needs a memory wipe in order for it. Which is a really touching scene....or would have been if it wasn’t immediately retconned because like R2 has backups. So like whoo.

So that’s like *two* instances of fakeout death because like Nothing Is Of Consequence Because Star Wars.

Except Leia dying because fuck moms, say JJ Terrio. Moms are Not Star Wars. The Reddit bros have now started to return their text messages.

More busy stuff happens. Hux dies. I wasn’t able to thoroughly enjoy it because by this point I had A Headache from all the Pew Pew and Wooooo~~.

Ben tells Rey that like ~her power is Palpatines power because like How Else Can Rey Be Powerful.” Does this make any sense? Not at all but like Don’t Think Too Hard.

He also finally takes off his stupid helmet that was glued together by ~Sith Alchemy~ that they bought from Space!Michaels.

Rey is vaguely disraught but like She Finally Has A Purpose and the Reddit Bros are Appeased.

More shit happens. Does it matter? Not really.

They meet Jannah! She’s cool and has the exact same backstory as Finn. Because in Star Wars There Are Only (2) Backstories for black characters. They line up the dagger that is old as fuck with the death star wreckage. Which lines up exactly. Evidently erosion is Not A Thing.

Finn and Jannah and basically go, Wow Isn’t It Rad That Because We Have The Force We [Finn, Jannah and her crew] Were Able To Reject Brainwashing and Bounce Because We Have The Force.

Rey runs off and Finn yells “REY!!” at some point but at least he knows his best angles while he does it.

Rey meets Dark!Rey who’s a vision....for five seconds. Because Remember if Girls Go Dark They Have Sinned In The Eyes of The Force. Ben shows up and crushes the Holocron because I refuse to call it that stupid-ass name-- dear fucking lord his hand is big--and WELP I GUESS I HAVE THE ONLY ONE.

They fight because We Need A Light Saber Fight Except This One is So Lackluster.

Then Leia reaches out to do something that will use up all her strength says Maz. How does Maz know this? Idk but she’s played by Lupita N’yongo so at least it sounds Deep And Wise because That’s Why You Cast Black People...to sound deep and wise. =_= **deeper breathe**

Anyway, she reaches out to her son! Her son hears her? I think? Either way it distracts him which lets Rey impale him. Except then she heals him?? And is like, I wanted to take your hand, Ben’s hand. which like I’d be fine with if like the movie had like worked for it. But like That Would Involve Actual Conversations Between Characters and We Are Going At 34243242432 pps (parsecs per second) and thus DO NOT HAVE TIme For That.

Ben then has a rehash of the scene from TFA because JJ Terrio is a fucking hack and is unable to create original material and this would have been meaningful if like Any of the Emotions Had Been Earn in The Fucking Film. But hey, I felt .75 of an emotion when Han Solo cradled his cheek so I will accept this. Then he yeets his saber into the ocean. Because. Yeet. Sadly, this movie is Not Over and My Suffering Will Not End

Poe and Finn head back to base with Jannah because I guess that’s what we’re doing? They find out that Leia is dead etc etc etc. The Resistance has a Circle Planning Session for the Final Battle that JJ Terrio lifted straight from ROTJ and the Reddit Bros brought them a corsage for Fanbro Prom. I am reminded that ROTJ was better than this garbage that I Paid Actual Money To Watch. Rey heads to Fish Nun island and decides to pull a Luke Skywalker move even we learned from the Last Movie (TLJ) why that was a Bad Idea but you know WE GET TO SEE LUKE AGAIN IS A GARBAGE WIG BECAUSE REDDIT BROS AMIRITE? We get the most hamfisted performance out of Mark Hamill and I’m just like damn The Last Jedi as a fucking gift and a _Jedi’s weapon is important_ platitude like his dad wasn’t yeeting his saber left and right. But Who Cares About Canon When We Have Pew Pew Pew Pew.

Luke tells her that Yes He And Leia Always Knew She Was A Palpatine which like means - Leia literally did not learn from the Last Time She Obscured Someone’s Parentage and the Fall Out - Actively lied to Rey - Luke actively lied to Rey - jfc this poor girl has been aggressively lied by most of the authority adults in her life??? - HER PARENTS SOLD HER TO PROTECT HER which is such a fucking damning think along with the fact that her parents are idiots and like didn’t think to take her to the new republic and like THERE ARE 23432432 things wrong with this set up but that is a Whole ‘Nother Rant

Also evidently? Leia ended her Jedi Journey (which abbreviated as JJ, coincidence? I THINK NOT.) because she saw her sons demised but evidently....couldn’t sense her son being groomed by Snoke, creation of Palpatine and like this entire movie makes Leia look like an ineffectual idiot?? Like I was really hoping that Leia was going to be able to escape the “Fuck Mom’s” curse of Star Wars BUT I GUESS THAT BECAUSE THAT’S NOT ~true star wars~

Anyway, evidently Leia gave him her saber which I guess she made but no one decided to show that but instead some freakish CGI (that they swore they wouldn’t do) fight scene because like Leia Obviously Isn’t A Real Force User Unless You Use A Lightsaber. The Reddit Bros Nod Sagely. So Rey decides to go to Exegol.....using the Luke’s X-Wing. The Reddit Bros are weeping tears of joy at this point. The Resistance starts their FINAL ASSAULT! THEY HAVE SPACE HORSES RIDING ON A SHIP BECAUSE DOESN’T THAT LOOK COOL! FINN KIND OF USES THE FORCE. THEY DECIDE TO BLOW UP THE STAR DESTROYERS BECAUSE FUCK CHILD SOLDIERS AMIRITE (rip Finn’s Stormtrooper backstory that JJ constructed that He Couldn’t Even Be Arse To Complete or like Think Of Because Like That Would Be Nuanced Shit but like He Gets to - Jump Over Things! - Run! - Know His Angles - Yell desperately After A White Lady because ahahahahha fuck WOC when there’s white p*ssy on the line AMIRITE?)

Either way they’re in trouble and Poe is dismayed and is like yo i’m sorry we’re doomed. Because...that’s.....what generals do. Give The Fuck Up. BUT DON’T WORRY LANDO IS HERE TO SAVE THE DAY BECAUSE EVIDENTLY WHILE THE GALAXY IGNORED LEIA ORGANA’S PLEAS, THEY LISTENED TO LANDO

(Crack theory: He hit up all his exes.)

Rey flies to Exegol to confront Grandpalps. Who never wanted her dead but to become Empress after spending 2.5 movies wanting her dead via puppet!Snoke. Also kudos to JJ Terrio to making a Sith Temple be so fucking boring and lackluster. That Took Skill.\

ANYWAY SHE SEES HER FRIENDS IN TROUBLE MUCH LIKE IN TLJ and in ROTJ but JJ Terrio really really loves his nostalgia and ROTJ was very very very formative evidently. She’s about to Strike Him Down In Anger And Absorb Grandpapa’s essence in order to save her friends but WAIT WHO IS THIS IDIOT RUNNING IN WITH NO FUCKING PLAN Yes, it is Ben Solo channeling his father. As carrying the blaster that Lando gifted to him in Aftermath but like we can only suppose that because who Needs Convos When You Have Pew Pew Pew~ His former Knights show up (who have also never spoken because hahahahah dialogue? Sounds fake. Also moment of Silence of Rian who kept them alive and used Praetorian guards in TLJ instead because he assumed that JJ made them for a meaningful reason because he was Unaware That JJ Was A Fucking Hack)

Anyway, Rey senses him! They do a super cool force bond moment that actually Pays Off and Rey hands off her saber to Ben. Through the force. It’s dope.

#BenSoloChallenge happens.

[In spite of like No Speaking At All, Adam Driver successfully channels the aura of Han Solo in spite of JJ Terrio desperately Insisting That Poe Dameron is Obviously Han Look He Even Ran Spice!!! Look!!]

Eventually they both stand before Palpatine Ready To Throw Down except in stand Palps leeches the lifeforce from them and then yeets Ben into a pit and Rey collapses.

THEN ALL THE JEDI FROM THE MOVIES AND CLONE WARS INCLUDE AHSOKA WHICH MAKES NO SENSE GIVEN CLONE WARS BUT WHAT EVER DON’T YOU FEEL VALIDATED!!! FANS!!! SCREAMS JJ TERRIO

me: no.

Rey pulls a Wonder Woman move because all you need to do to redirect Force Lightning is cross your light sabers. Anyway, that effort kills her (or like maybe not? Says Terrio in multiple interviews because men from Harvard Literally Never Shut Up.)

Ben somehow?? Climbs?? Out of the pit?? Under his own power because The Jedi Still Haven’t Forgiven the Skywalker Line for Anakin. Even though Anakin also reached out to Rey? I’m just assuming the soul of St. Maul of the Pit was yelling angry motivational speeches to get him out of the pit while St. Ventress adding sarcasm commentary comparing Ben and his namesake.

EITHER WAY HE’S OUT OF THE PIT! And is like in agony because Rey is uh in limp ragdoll mode so probably dead? We’re gonna go with dead.

He limps over to her because uh evidently getting yeeted into a pit is Not Good For Ones Health or Limbs.

Ben cradles her in his arms and at that moment I had to Apologize For Everyone I Dragged for Size Kink because Adam Driver is Fucking Large and His Hand is Fucking Huge and I, Mneme, Was Wrong You Are Valid.

*cough* where was I? Ah yes, he’s cradling her in his arms realizing she’s dead and I guess? Channeling the force to heal her. Which it does.

He’s happy! She’s happy!

She says “Ben” breathlessly.

AND THEN SHE SNOGS HIM LIKE THE AWKWARD VIRGINS THAT THEY ARE.

The Force realizes that a Male Skywalker is Getting A Boner and Goes Nope. And he just collapses and fades away at the same time that Leia fades away because ~symmetry~. Was a war going on? Uh maybe but like LETS NOT WORRY ABOUT LOGISTICS BUT INSTEAD CUT TO EWOKS!! WE ALL LOVE EWOKS RIGHT!! Rey flies back to Ajan Kloss. Poe, Finn, and Rey hug because this movie is almost over and they can stop trying to sell a non-existent trio created because JJ didn’t have the balls to let Poe stay dead in TFA.

Commander D’Arcy kisses her wife in the background but no one really notices and it was cut in Singapore but like JJ Terrio are Woke AF Y’ALL but not too woke because else they’ll get dumped by Reddit Bros.

No, we are Sadly Not Done.

LETS GO TO A SAND PLANET. No, it’s not Jakku it’s Tatooine~ DON’T YOU GUYS REMEMBER TATOOINE!! go JJ Terrio.

You mean the planet where Anakin Skywalker was a slave, Luke Skywalker desperately wanted to leave, and Leia Organa was put into that humiliated outfit? Yes. I remember.

REY’S HERE TO BURY LUKE AND LEIA’S SABERS HERE!! At the Lars homestead that is somehow intact....in spite of Jawas.

What wha-- why??, you may ask.

Well Luke never got to show Leia his home planet, goes JJ Terrio. Literally anyone who saw ROTJ.....they were on it in then?? JJ Terrio: i can’t see mariah carey dot gif

Rey also shows off her new lightsaber that was evidently crafted from her staff but we were not shown that on screen because like It Was Considered To Emotional for this Film.

Then finally some old woman passes by and is like Who are you? Rey: Rey Old Nosy Lady: Rey who? *Rey stares at the Force Ghosts of Luke and Leia looking like her parents* Rey: Rey Skywalker JJ TERRIO: SEEEEE WE DID REY SKYWALKER!!! AREN’T WE COOL me: she took the name of a grumpy old man who rejected her and whom she bounced off with his shit because he was being a dick....OKAY JAN

(ffs they could have let her take the name Organa but like Fuck Women amirite? *DRINKS*)

and yeah that’s it. Kid that was brainwashed as a child was reduced to going WHOOOOO every 5 seconds with no thought regarding his fellow stormtroopers who are still brainwashed.

Kid that was abandoned under the guise of ~love~ and sold to an abusive guardian and struggled and starved for years returns to a planet of sand and yes I know that she is probably going else where but that was a choice they made to have the last shot of her Alone with a Droid staring at the twin suns because JJ Terrio have been doing nothing but spraying nostalgia in my face for just under 2 and a half hours.

Kid who was actively groomed since childhood and only just now released from said clutches but lol can’t atone because he dead now.

Kid who lost her sister to the machine of war is pushed aside because she dared to exist.

and Poe.

The End of the Skywalker Saga y’all.

Bonus: “Uh, Mneme what about Rose?” She got exactly a 76 seconds that she acted her heart out in but evidently seeing a non-submissive Asian woman in Star Wars was too much for people last film so that uh Essentially Cut Her Out. Don’t worry they made sure to give her a quarter of a page in the visual dictionary and the Merry the Hobbit two page spread. So like Don’t Worry The Asian Girl Will Not Hurt You. “Mneme, what as the point of Poe?” Fuck, if I fucking know.

“Uh Mneme, the Only Reason Finn Didn’t Have An Arc Is Because of KYLE RON!!!!”

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

Exhibit C

trust me, it really wasn’t.

#tros spoilers #mneme watches: TROS #Star Wars Into Darkness

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mrsgreenworld · 3 years

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Sen Çal Kapımı Episode 17 aka Expect The Unexpected

I know I have been quite slow with the reviews lately. I guess real life just got busier and messier. But my thoughts are always with the show, with our two crazy lovesick kids. I make sure to watch each new episode live, keep up with new fragmans.

I remember before episode 17 aired, after having seen the fragmans, I was ready for another filler episode. I was also a bit frustrated that instead of moving the storyline forward they decided to randomly throw in the pregnancy scare trope. However, the writers managed to surprise me with the episode that I hadn't expected much from. I also believe we might have got a bit of foreshadowing as well as an important catalyst to finally move the story forward.

But let's discuss all the good and bad in detail.

The things I loved/liked:

☑️ how balanced this episode was: the transition from the lighter and funnier first part to a more loaded second half with some longing between Edser, completely unexpected turn of events at the party and finally - that gut-wrenching final scene; everything was done at the right pace, at least it felt that way to me; they didn't drag on the pregnancy misunderstanding, it was resolved in one day which I was more than happy with (it could've lasted for days 😬);

☑️ Serkan: my baby is back where he belongs - among all the things I loved about the episode 🥰❤️

honestly, Serkan and his response to the whole situation was one of the main highlights for me - it was hilarious, it was adorable, it was sweet, it was loving;

I have already mentioned before that I absolutely love how attuned to Eda Serkan is; this episode wasn't an exception; do you remember the moment he realised something was up? it literally took a comment from Leyla to Eda about tea and our boy's eyebrows immediately furrowed in confusion and suspicion; and when he came up to Eda to tell her they would work together and asked if that was okay - of course he noticed how Eda's face changed before she left for the bathroom; and a concerned hubby that he is he asked Leyla what was wrong and then instructed her to keep tabs on Eda - swoon 🥰😍

that phone call to the family doctor and his face when he heard the doctor mention pregnancy - 🤣🤣🤣🤣

and then his comment about Ebola completely cracked me up - he's such a hypochondriac 👀😬🙈😂

his bathroom meltdown - comedy GOLD! Kerem was spectacular in that scene, his facial expressions as well as that "NE???!!!" - worthy of a standing ovation 👏👏👏 and it proves what a great actor he is in both funny comedy moments and loaded dramatic scenes; it gets me rolling on the floor when he juggles all sorts of facial expressions and I drown in my own tears when he cries;

then there were tiny adorable moments that, I think, really spoke volumes yet again what sort of person Serkan is - kind and caring, someone who loves deeply; when he told Eda not to sit down so fast, when he asked if she was hungry, tried to make her sit down, was worried that she was cold, took unhealthy snacks from her and got her fruit and nuts instead, was making sure she was comfortable, kept glancing at her stomach - all that was a sneak peek at what Serkan Bolat will be as a father; he will be such a mother hen and when Eda is actually pregnant I swear he will be the one more hormonal 🤣😂😆

I loved that he shared his suspicions with Engin;

his reaction when the misunderstanding got cleared up - I was rolling on the floor 🤣🤣

and while he was relieved it didn't look bad on him; it wasn't a type of relief when a person doesn't really want kids or doesn't want them with this particular person and thinks "oh, that was close!"; I am sure when it comes to Eda Serkan wants to make their own football team of Mini-Bolats; he wants this woman to have his children - I believe it without a shadow of doubt; however, I am also sure that, given the current situation Serkan and Eda are in, Serkan wouldn't want to tie Eda to himself like that;

the party - when he saw Eda in the dress he had bought for her 🔥🔥🔥🔥; I am sure he was useless in the conversations he was trying to make because his focus was entirely on Eda, he was following her every move with hungry eyes; damn, Sir! at least try to be a little more discreet 😏🥵

I loved how he asked Eda point blank if she had chosen the dress on purpose - he wasn't even trying to hide how affected he was;

and finally - of course there was that final scene with Serkan when he completely LOST IT; honestly, watching him break down like that - gave me chills;

we had never seen him like that; it's a well-known and established fact what kind of a person Serkan Bolat is - he's a control freak who can and is good at keeping his emotions in check, he doesn't express his feelings easily or even at all that's why he comes off as a cold and emotionless robot; so can you imagine how bad the situation has to be for him to lose it like that and not in the privacy of his home, where he's alone, but in the office, with all his employees and friends as witnesses?

the situation is really Serkan's worst nightmare due to the number of reasons:

1 - Serkan is a control freak (as I have already mentioned many times) and being in a situation where he cannot control something is hard for him psychologically;

2 - Serkan is a perfectionist and perfectionism often stems from the fear of making mistakes because a person was raised this way, wasn't allowed to make any mistakes as a child; we have even heard it from Serkan himself in one of the conversations with his father - he grew up thinking he had no right for mistakes, thinking that he must have done something wrong for his parents to just send him away;

3 - the cruel irony of this situation being so similar to what had happened to Eda's parents;

of course no one died but it could have happened; then Serkan would have turned into his father (in his own mind and eyes); it's just like Eda's parents all over again; can you imagine what kind of thoughts were going through his head? how he's cursed or something, that he really doesn't deserve Eda, that his family taints everything it touches... 😭💔

Kerem's acting in the last scene was truly one of his best and strongest Serkan moments👏👏👏👏;

☑️ Eda: one of my absolute favourite things about our girl is that she keeps her word; there are not many people who do this in life (while I myself try to keep my promises I, unfortunately, often fail);

I was so proud that, no matter what's going on between herself and Serkan, Eda didn't refuse to help Aydan and promised that they would work on her phobia together;

I also loved Eda's idea with the virtual tour around London - very creative and thoughtful way to help Aydan get out of the house without actually leaving the house because baby steps, this cannot be rushed, this type of problems don't go away at the snap of our fingers;

while I find it a bit strange that Eda volunteered to babysit a random couple's child (me and Serkan both, he also said that he doesn't understand Eda 🙈😆) it's another great manifestation to the type of a person she is - kind, loving, generous, ready to help even complete strangers; moreover, the whole situation with the baby allowed us to sneak a peek at Eda as a mother;

and speaking of that scene where Serkan said he didn't understand Eda and wanted to know why she would agree to help people she didn't know - I freaking LOVED how unapologetic she was when she said it's who she is; so he either accepts her for who she is (the way she accepted him) or he can be on his merry way; that's such a joy to watch - a woman who's not sorry for who she is, who loves and respects herself and demands the same respect in return 👏👏👏💞💞💞;

finally, there was the final scene but before that there was also a small moment after the roof had collapsed, when they were still at that house - everybody had left and Eda asked Serkan if there was something she could do, if he wanted to be left alone; she gave him what he wanted and needed in that moment;

but the next day, in the office, after having witnessed his breakdown Eda shows her unwavering belief in Serkan; I loved how she was able to put aside her hurt, maybe to an extent even her pride, and come to him; how she didn't back down and in that moment refused to leave him alone because she knew that wasn't what he needed, he needed her; and she was there, she was there when it mattered;

☑️ Edser: these two idiots are broken up but I swear they couldn't look or act more married; that's basically what we got in this episode - a flashforward of sorts where Edser are married with a kid and expecting another one;

however, this episode also provided us with some longing and lots of UST at that party;

and again there were subtle nods to them being soulmates, which manifested itself in how attuned to each other they were (Serkan with the pregnancy, Eda at the end of the episode) and also the parallel scene at the very beginning with both of them boxing - the same choice of activity to take their minds off of each other (it was also hot as hell 🔥🔥🔥🥵);

☑️ Aydan: OMG CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS?

yes, Aydan made it into this category!😱😲

but the writers had really been doing a good job with her and actually showed character growth;

at the beginning of the episode when Eda confronted Aydan about what she had overheard Aydan tried to make something up and said how it was her who had convinced Serkan that they were wrong for each other; what I really enjoyed in that moment was how uncomfortable Aydan looked while saying all those things; it was basically written on her face that what she was saying wasn't true, that wasn't how she felt, she understood that it would hurt Eda to hear that and she didn't want that; it's such a stark contrast to Aydan from episode 11; does anyone remember episode 11? well, I do, perfectly well; I was ENRAGED; Aydan back then said how Eda was not the right match for her son, she was cruel and she didn't even give a flying flip that her words were hurtful for Eda;

it was also nice to see how humbled Aydan was while receiving Eda's help;

☑️ Engin: basically the fact that he continues being the best best friend ever and his reaction to Eda's possible pregnancy - PRICELESS!🤣🤣🤣

I think Engin is the second (after Eda) and the last person who can get away with pulling Serkan Bolat by his cheeks 🙈😆😂

I also really enjoyed Engin's dig at Serkan's character and how he hoped his nephew/niece wouldn't take after Serkan 🤣🤣🤣;

The things I didn't like / was annoyed with:

❎ Efe: oh, he's one bad motherfucker!😠😡🤬😤

from pretty much openly threatening to teach Serkan a lesson to actually fucking up those blueprints and setting Serkan up - THE *UCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

it was clear from the phone call with his secret partner that he hadn't planned for it to go like that but still his intentions had clearly been far from good and he deserves whatever is coming his way; like Serkan Bolat coming for his head and ending his career 🙄😎;

❎ Pırıl and Engin: the whole jealousy thing was so far-fetched and tiring to watch; to me Pırıl seemed a bit too territorial, it's quite obvious that Engin had only eyes for her; Engin was too oblivious and honestly I feel bad for him because the writers turn him into a bigger idiot (when it comes to women) with each new episode;

❎ Selin: the same thing over and over again, in each new episode she's unbearable; she just walks around with bitch face, complains about everything and everyone but ultimately serves zero purpose;

this character is so focused on herself that she didn't even seem bothered by her conversation with Efe where he basically threatened Serkan; there was a poor attempt with that "should I be worried?" but it was enough for Efe to just smile at her and she let it slide 🤦🤷;

in that scene at the office with Ceren and Ferit the behaviour she demonstrated was the one of a pre-schooler or maybe immature teenager but definitely not of a grown-up woman;

❎ Ceren and Ferit: while they started out really well, I enjoyed their first meeting, then it got weird and their interactions became awfully uneven; Ceren is really overdoing this hot and cold thing;

while I liked how Ceren stood up for herself after Selin's outburst, I think all of that should have been said to Selin's face, not Ferit's.

And that's pretty much it! Finally!🥳🥳🥳

P.S. Wanted to post my episode 18 review today as well, before episode 19 airs, but it's still not ready, need to cut down some stuff cause it's turning into a freaking monster 🤦😱

#sen çal kapımı #sen cal kapimi #sck #sen çal kapımı episode 17 thoughts #sck episode 17 #edser #eda ve serkan #eda x serkan #eda yıldız #eda yildiz #serkan bolat

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sw4gg1e4life · 3 years

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Yu Yu Hakusho (Reviewing 25 years later)

This anime is like a forgotten gem. It doesn’t come to mind as #1 first but when mentioned everyone goes oh yea that was like one of the best anime’s of all time. I feel like most anime’s don’t have the same level of action, adventure, comedy, drama, and growth that this show offered. Whether you watch it as a kid for action & childish humor or as an adult for the deeper drama, life lessons and adult humor, it’s great across generations and across time whether you watched it as a kid in the 90s/00s or now in 2021.

Let me simplify it because there’s so much in-depth analysis I could go into.

Ratings per Arc/Saga:

Spirit Detective - 8/10

Dark Tournament - 10/10

Chapter Black - 8/10

Three Kings - 7/10

Deeper Analysis:

Spirit Detective - Honestly this arc had amazing parts to it, introducing the main characters, slowly improving enemies, and setting up for the Dark Tournament. I love the intro and how Yusuke has to undergo his ordeal showing his relationship with Kuwabara, Keiko, his mother, Boton, Koenma and everyone else around him. We’re introduced to a brat who doesn’t really belong but slowly finds his place and purpose starting here as Spirit Detective. I loved the deeper stories with introducing Hiei and Kurama. The introduction of Genkai was amazing, it showed there’s different aspects of growing and trying to master spirit energy. I only wish that section was a bit longer, maybe just 2-3 episodes of more unique competitors. The Spirit Beasts section is what made it a tad lackluster. This is their first real mission to spirit world and the abilities of the 4 spirit beasts just felt somewhat limited to me. Especially the fire-tiger beast, his tenacity just became annoying at some point. This is what dropped the Spirit Detective Saga to an 8 for me or else I would’ve made it a 9. The final part is amazing, it brings some backstory to Hiei by introducing her sister and most importantly the Toguro brothers leading to the Dark Tournament.

All together, it’s probably one of the best intro sagas to any anime I’ve seen at least. There’s simplicity but also complexity at the same time depending on how deep you look into it. They didn’t just half ass the action like many of my other favorite action-packed anime (DBZ, Fairy Tail). There’s a lot of mystery, dark moments, and strategy for a supposed kids cartoon for the haters out there.

Dark Tournament - This has to be the best saga in any ever because of the different strategies, emotions, growth, and somehow comedy still added in. I can’t help but re-watch this saga again and again every few years. We start with a mystery question: how much did the main characters grow in strength, abilities, and strategies? Now as a teen then now adult, the masked fighter is obviously Genkai because of the height, outfit and abilities, but as a kid, she was such a mystery for me haha. Anyways we go into the tournament and the committee seems hell bent on pitting everything against Yusuke & friends. I like that though Yusuke’s team comes out on top at the end of each fight, they do lose some individual matches for multiple different reasons. Instead of mindless matches purely on the fighting, we actually learn some backstory about many enemies and our main characters. It didn’t take long either; there wasn’t a ridiculous amount of episodes spent per backstory like Naruto or Fairy Tail. Genkai showed even more wisdom but also understanding of humanity as she knows her time is ending so she passes on her power abilities and most importantly wisdom to her favorite dim-wit. And throughout the story, we get to know more about Genkai and Toguro’s backstory and how power, morals and unfortunate events can change one’s future. The part that most people forget is the final episodes of the Dark Tournament: Toguro has been and wants to continue punishing himself. He actually does care for Genkai and Yusuke. He knows Yusuke has greater potential to grow into something great but needs proper and sometimes drastic measures and guidance to do so.

This saga had an amazing start, several related series of actions in the middle and a proper explanation at the end for many questions we had. On top of all that we’re left clues to the next arc, subtle clues you don’t realize until the next arc comes around. Episode 66, was shocking, Koenma actually granted Yusuke’s wish for his mentor and friend to be revived to live until the end of her life in peace as much as possible.

Chapter Black - This saga was great. You really don’t know what it is until it’s fully explained. We all know there were stronger demons deeper in spirit world. But something deeper darker is coming and it’s crazy because after 66 episodes we realized we never wondered about a previous Spirit Detective. What happened to that one? Now we get a trio of test spiritually aware humans just to test Yusuke & Kuwabara, but the really interesting part is when Sensui and his team is brought in. A few abilities were obvious but others were so mysterious with a constant ominous presence and heartbeat music looming over. What is each unique opponent’s abilities and what is Sensui’s background and end goal? His multiple personalities each containing yet even more unique abilities with his desire for an open tunnel into the depths of Spirit World for A/S class demons is insane. It seems impossible for Yusuke to win here even with Kuwabara’s sacrifice again. But wow what a reveal that he does have a secret demon king lineage in his blood. I both love and hate this at the same time. It feels like a cop-out but also explains everything at the same time. It’s like Super Saiyan in DBZ but different because at least here it took until the 3rd Saga and several arcs to reveal it. I guess in the overall scheme of things it’s like having Dragonball before Dragonball Z. Anyways the ending is amazing as we see them fight and find out just why Sensui wanted this all along as well as his gay partner’s obsession over him.

This was a great saga with a truly ominous back story and I love it. The only reason I keep it rated at 8/10 is unfortunately it happens right after the best saga ever in the Dark Tournament. At this point, power scaling and the use of demon king lineage in Yusuke just unfortunately puts the rating here. And we already know what the next saga is about for sure. There’s nothing left to really explore.

Three Kings - Here we go, the finale of Yu Yu Hakusho. We know Yusuke is of demon king lineage so of course he’s going to go train in Demon World. Hiei and Kurama obviously would follow along. Now with everything being obvious, why is it still interesting? Somehow the writers/producers of Yu Yu Hakusho find a way to bring even more back story in appropriate timing without it becoming filler. Learning about the deep ancient history of Raizen vs Yomi vs Mukuro shows how even as demons they have a human aspect: Raizen who ended up loving a human, Yomi who had a child and history with Kurama, and Mukuro with her tragic backstory that led to an odd relationship with Hiei. The ending is great with yet another tournament. As a kid, I wished they had a full tournament arc, but decades later I realized how much sense it makes that they didn’t show us the whole tournament, just key battles and how no one in our main crew won. Yusuke, Kurama and Hiei still has much to learn and grow. Yomi and Mukuro’s time has passed. A new brighter future awaits the demon world. Yusuke finally gets his happy ending with Keiko.

This final saga unfortunately because of its timing and closure gets a rating of 7/10. For an ending it’s great and I’m not sure how to improve it. That’s why I’m not a producer/writer haha. But it is definitely amazing and I appreciate it. Yusuke went from a kid/teen to a young adult. The story we came to know and love is over and he did NOT end up obsessed like Toguro. He didn’t choose the demon life. He also didn’t choose a psychic path like Genkai. He chose his own path with his friends in the human world continuing as spirit detective but living as close to a normal life as possible. I love this ending, The ending and whole narrative makes me give this show a 10/10. Yes I know they released 2 specials in 2018 but why not that’s a small treat for us fans. They can do specials maybe every decade or so. I don’t actually want them to do a new continued series like Dragonball Super. Let the original show be what it is and be remembered in history as one of the most unique shows with catchy theme songs. Also the Eng dub is actually good haha. Listen carefully for the adult humor hidden in the show if you’re re-watching it. You likely didn’t understand every NSFW joke as a kid. I know I didn’t haha.

#YuYuKakusho Yusuke Anime AnimeReview

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pauleonotis · 4 years

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These last 2-3 days really reminded me of an old Drarry Au that I had so after searching for my old notes I revised them and thought I‘d share it.

(Trans!Harry, Trans!Draco; Warning: There’s mention of some transphobic behavior)

When Harry was sitting for the first time in the train on his way to Hogwarts Ron joined him

»Hi. I‘m Ron Weasley,« he said and Harry smiled »I‘m Harry Potter.«

Ron looked at him confused and hesistantly asked if he has heard his name right. Harry just nodded.

His new found friend asked him a couple of questions and they talked about what Ron had heard about him, or at least what he had heard about ’her’

Harry answered everything and then started to explain about him still being a boy even though he was born with female body parts

And for the first time ever he didn’t get a snarky remark like “it‘s just a phase“ or “but your biological gender is and will always be female“ (which btw was still not true, while he had a vagina his biological gender still is male. He was born with a male brain. So even as little child it already felt wrong being called a girl. Everyone out there might only see his female body but Harry simply knew better even without understanding it back then.)

»Is it true?« came a voice from outside their compartment. Draco was standing there. »They‘re saying all down the train that Hailey Potter‘s in this compartment. So it’s you, is it? I‘m Malfoy. Draco Malfoy.«

Harry looked at Draco but before he could say anything it was Ron who spoke up »It‘s Harry Potter.«

Draco sniggered and looked at Ron sneering »I don’t need to ask who you are. My father told me all the Weasleys have red hair, freckles, and more children than they can afford,« he told him and continued »it also seems like your family can’t afford medical bills. You might want to check your hearing.«

Draco now turned to Harry »You‘ll soon find out some wizarding families are better than others, Potter. You don’t want to go making friends with the wrong sort. I can help you there.« He held out his hand.

»I can tell the wrong sort for myself, thanks,« Harry replies coolly. »And just so you know, Ron was right. It is Harry Potter. I identify as male.«

For a moment Harry could swear he saw something apologetic in Draco’s glance. But then it turned sour. He stormed off flushing angrily.

It took quite some time until everyone referred to him as Harry Potter and until he was known as the boy who lived. But in Hogwarts no one seemed to mind, it was the complete opposite reaction of what he has experienced in the muggle world and he loved it. He finally felt accepted, his mind was at peace and he didn’t hear anyone talking about him badly or made him feel like he doesn’t belong. Here he was just an ordinary student at Hogwarts. Even Draco Malfoy didn’t say anything bad about him being transgender. Tho he did insult him or his friends and played some unfair and mean pranks, that’s how he became Harry‘s school nemesis.

After the war Harry came back to finish his education.

During the summer break he went to Poppy Pomfrey, who nursed him quite a lot over the years. She was the only medical witch he trusted so she was the one to do the sex reassignment (tho it wasn’t a sex reassignment per se, after all he was already a man.)

She also gave him potions for his voice to get deeper and to support his facial hair growth.

Surprisingly quite a lot students came back, even from Slytherin, including Draco.

So many that they still managed to form Quidditch teams of every house, which was the reason that McGonagall allowed the 8th year students to play matches too.

After the game Gryffindor vs. Slytherin they all went to change when Harry noticed Draco, sitting subtle on a bench and waiting for everyone to shower, dress up and leave.

It seemed like he didn’t notice Harry so when it got quiet he stood up and began undressing. Harry did the same while keeping an eye on Malfoy.

When he took off his shirt that’s when he noticed Draco was wearing something beneath it. And then he realized what exactly it was.

A chest binder.

»Are you done watching me, Potter? I‘d like to change without getting stared at. Preferably alone actually,« he snarled.

It took him a moment to progress everything. And that’s when Harry noticed the slight swaying in the sound of Dracos voice. He was using a spell for it.

»I never noticed,« admitted Harry »You could’ve went to Pomfrey, you know?« at that Draco huffed.

»Of course you didn’t. No one did, because it’s none of your business. If I would tell Pomfrey everyone would know sooner or later, I can’t risk that.«

»Why though? You saw how accepting everyone was- still is. Yeah you were a git but they wouldn’t say something about you being a trans man, because it wouldn’t change anything at all. For example you and your friends literally did hate me and still didn’t go for my most sensitive part.«

»I didn’t hate you, I was jealous,« Draco admitted, to both of their surprise

»If someone would find out they‘d tell my father. You don’t know how my parents are. Not every wizard and every witch is as accepting as you might think, Potter,« Draco spat

While everyone at Hogwarts already knew Draco was male (with Snapes help so that the teachers would call him by the right pronouns, he was the only one who knew and he took this secret to his grave), at home he didn’t dare to use any of his charms or to wear his clothes and his binder beneath.

At home he was forced to be Cassiopeia Malfoy. Being his parents‘ 'princess'. He hated it.

He envied Harry, who didn’t have his parents anymore so he doesn’t need to be afraid of not being accepted, kicked out or getting disowned.

Draco, even though his parents would only love him for being their little girl and not loving him the way he actually was, loved his parents dearly.

It breaks his heart while he has always been well-behaved and polite just the way his parents have raised him and while he‘d do everything for them out of love, they couldn’t accept him for who he truly was.

After all the only thing that would change was his name and his physical appearance somewhat.

It was then when Draco noticed his cheeks were wet. While thinking about his parents he must‘ve began to cry. And even worse, Harry was still there looking at him surprised. And he was about to say something.

»You would never understand,« Draco said dismissively while wiping always his tears and turned away. He now continued getting dressed.

»You‘re wrong. I do understand. Most likely better than anyone else ever would,« Harry replied and thought of his uncle Vernon and his aunt Petunia.

They already hated him for his magic. And while Harry actually didn’t mind wearing Dudleys old clothes, they always made fun of him. Being a girl and wearing too big and old boys clothes.

»It’s horrible. Being afraid of telling people who are close to you something that means so much to you,« Harry said and began walking towards Draco.

»People who are supposed to love and support you. No matter what because they’re family. It’s a relief to finally speak out loud about it. Being able to tell it the whole world. You shouldn’t have hide like that, Draco,« Harry continues.

»But for what price?! I could lose everything, Potter! The love and support of my parents, my home and safe place, all of my hopes and dreams—« Draco began but his breath hitched when Harry turned him around and held his shoulders.

»The love and support for a person that isn’t you? For what price? Well, Happiness. Yes there might be some people who can’t accept you the way you are but that’s just their limited thinking. What matters most is that you stay true to yourself. No matter what people say about you and no matter how much they try to talk you out of it or try to make you insecure by telling you they would know better. They don’t. It’s your life, your decisions, and your mind and body. Not theirs. They have nothing to say about your life and the way you want to live it. And if they can’t stay out of your business then let them waste their time by giving unnecessary remarks. Because you« Harry wiped away Dracos tears, apparently he has started to cry again but this time he didn’t care »are free to do whatever you want. It’s them who are not satisfied enough with their lives so they have to take it out on others somehow. Slap them in their face by showing them how beautiful it is to just express yourself the way you are. You’re independent and you certainly don’t need anyone’s approval for simply being yourself.«

—

(At the end of this post I‘d like to mention that I myself am not transgender. Everything I wrote especially regarding the thoughts and fears is what I remember a friend of mine told me or what I did read and/or researched online. I just added some little details that I thought of while I imagined what I would think or of what I would be afraid of and/or insecure about if I myself would be a female being born with male body parts or the other way around.

It‘s possible that I made some mistakes, so please believe me when I say that I do not want to offend anyone who was reading this nor do I want to share any false informations. Please tell me if you found something that I might have misunderstood and what I need to change to correct my mistake/s.

Apart from that I also want to add that it‘s 4am [update: now almost 6- why am I like this?;-;] and I had to write this down otherwise I couldn’t sleep so I probably made mistakes in spelling and/or grammar. But I hope there aren’t too much so that it’s not distracting.)

#harry potter #draco malfoy #harry potter au #trans rights #trans harry potter #trans draco malfoy #mentions of transphobic behaviour #drarry #is this a ficlet?#idk #anyway #have a great day or night!#my art

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mediaevalmusereads · 3 years

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The Lady’s Guide to Celestial Mechanics. By Olivia Waite. New York: Avon Impulse, 2019.

Rating: 2.5/5 stars

Genre: historical romance, wlw romance

Part of a Series? Yes, Feminine Pursuits #1

Summary: As Lucy Muchelney watches her ex-lover’s sham of a wedding, she wishes herself anywhere else. It isn’t until she finds a letter from the Countess of Moth, looking for someone to translate a groundbreaking French astronomy text, that she knows where to go. Showing up at the Countess’ London home, she hoped to find a challenge, not a woman who takes her breath away.

Catherine St Day looks forward to a quiet widowhood once her late husband’s scientific legacy is fulfilled. She expected to hand off the translation and wash her hands of the project—instead, she is intrigued by the young woman who turns up at her door, begging to be allowed to do the work, and she agrees to let Lucy stay. But as Catherine finds herself longing for Lucy, everything she believes about herself and her life is tested.

While Lucy spends her days interpreting the complicated French text, she spends her nights falling in love with the alluring Catherine. But sabotage and old wounds threaten to sever the threads that bind them. Can Lucy and Catherine find the strength to stay together or are they doomed to be star-crossed lovers?

***Full review under the cut.***

Content Warnings: sexism, allusions to homophobia

Overview: I feel like I’m in the minority of not loving this book as much as I wanted to. Based on content alone, it should have been a perfect storm for me: a historical sapphic romance, a lady scientist, debates about the value of art and women’s contributions... but while the romance genre doesn’t have nearly enough wlw stories, representation alone wasn’t enough to sustain my interest in this novel. It had the threads of a good story - something along the lines of The Countess Conspiracy or The Suffragette Scandal - but in my opinion, too much of the focus was on needless interpersonal drama, which left the plot dragging for the bulk of the story. So though the representation is great, and there are a number of feminist themes that I think are valuable, I didn’t enjoy this book enough to give it more than 2 or 3 stars.

Writing: Waite’s prose is about what you’d expect from the romance genre. It’s simple and straightforward, getting to the point without leaving the reader wondering what’s going on. My main criticism would perhaps be that Waite sometimes does a little head-hopping in the middle of a chapter without a section break. One minute, we’ll be seeing things from Lucy’s POV, and the next, we’ll get something from Catherine, then back to Lucy. It was a little jarring, but not too distracting - I could still immerse myself in the story ok.

Plot: The Lady’s Guide follows Lucy Muchelney as she translates, expands, and publishes M. Oleron’s Mechanique celeste (an astronomy text) under the patronage of Lady Catherine St. Day, Countess of Moth. After being rebuffed by the male members of the Polite Science Society, Lucy endeavors to render her own translation in hopes of educating readers who are interested in astronomy, but may not have had access to the range of texts needed to understand Oleron’s work. Catherine, for her part, funds the printing of Lucy’s work, while also discovering her own value as an embroiderer.

On the surface, this plot had all the things I love: women in science, valuing women’s art, a social commentary on patriarchy. But despite the interesting threads, I didn’t feel as if Waite used them to the greatest advantage. Aside from a few scenes, there wasn’t a lot of external pressure from the Polite Society; any drama that arose from their sexism was easily dismissed or avoided with a trip to the country, and I felt as if sexism in this book was more of a nuisance than a threat. This isn’t to say I wanted the characters to be constantly suffering or be miserable from an onslaught of male meddling, but I would like to have seen more of a sustained plotline where the Polite Society attempts to thwart Lucy’s efforts, thereby creating more suspense and giving Lucy and Catherine some external challenges to face together.

I also think the subplots could have been strengthened so that they enhanced the main conflict. The plot involving Eliza, the maid with a talent for sketching, was a good parallel to Catherine’s arc, which involved finding and rewarding women’s talents in art, but Eliza wasn’t a compelling character on her own, nor did I think Catherine reflect enough on the paradox of how she encouraged Eliza but not herself. I also think more could have been done with Lucy’s brother, Stephen, so that his meddling in Lucy’s career paralleled the Polite Society’s - just in a more subtle way, thereby showing different forms of sexism. Granted, there is a little of that, but like the Polite Society, Stephen pops up at convenient times before disappearing a page or two later.

Characters: I hate to say it, but I didn’t feel as if I could connect to the characters. Lucy, one of our heroines, is a mathematician and astronomer who inspires Catherine to see herself as an artist... and that’s mostly it. I guess she’s also bold and headstrong, but honestly, she felt more like an archetype than a fully-fledged character.

Catherine, for her part, is meek on account of being mistreated by her husband, but has brilliant skills as an embroiderer and is generous with her financial support. I did like the depth that Catherine had with regards to her insecurity over whether or not she could call herself an artist, and I liked that she respected Lucy’s feelings and didn’t allow her desires to be too selfish. But I also felt like she had no ambition or desires of her own until maybe 75% of the way through the book, and she mainly existed to support Lucy.

Side characters were hit or miss. I liked the idea of Eliza, the maid who gets to put her drawing skills to use as an engraver, but she wasn’t a fully-fleshed out character and didn’t hold my interest on her own. Stephen, Lucy’s brother, had the potential to be interesting, as he is an artist and acts as a foil to Lucy in many ways, but he flits in and out of the story as needed. Even Lucy’s ex, Pricilla, seems only to exist to make petty drama; there was no pining, no angst, and I didn’t see why Lucy had once loved her. There wasn’t even any commentary on how both Pris and Catherine were blond women who were skilled at embroidery.

Polite Society members had the potential to be good antagonists, but because their appearances were so contained, I don’t think they were used to their full potential. They provided some nice commentary, but I would have liked to see them meddle more often in Lucy’s translation process.

Romance: This is personal preference: I don’t like it when the love interests get together too early in the story. It usually means the rest of the romance is going to revolve around petty drama, and I think that’s what I got here. Lucy and Catherine become a couple some 25% of the way through the book, and for the life of me, I couldn’t see why they wanted to be together other than they were interested in women and happened to be sharing a house. Over time, their reasons for loving one another became a little more clear: Lucy loves that Catherine believes in her and lets her forge her own path, whereas Catherine loves that Lucy values her skills and lifts her up, rather than dismissing her (as Catherine’s deceased husband did). While these are certainly nice, I wanted there to be a little more to their romance. Because they got together so quickly, there was very little pining, very little growth in their affections.

I also think all the angst and relationship drama that happened after they got together was a little tedious. Lucy spends some time pining for her ex, which causes Catherine to be jealous. Catherine also sees the relationship as being incompatible at one point because Lucy likes science and she likes art, so of course that means they’re on different paths that can’t be reconciled. Most of the barriers to the relationship could have been overcome by either talking it out or getting to know one another a little better, so rather than good tension (in the form of suspense), I felt like there was pointless tension. I would have much rather seen Waite dive into the very real concerns, such as the economic inequality between them or the lack of permanence that comes with not being able to marry - I think those are real, life-altering concerns that could have tied in well with the non-romance plot, but unfortunately, those concerns seemed to be resolved a little too neatly.

TL;DR: Despite having some much-needed wlw representation and a number of feminist themes, The Lady’s Guide to Celestial Mechanics does little to cultivate a compelling plot and relies on misunderstandings to drive the romantic tension.

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