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#he just like me with my dads phone when I was 5
niclepto · 2 years
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One of the most powerful reigen's special moves: procrastination
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adustoflove · 2 months
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No one understands guilt better than a girl with emotionally immature parents
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sparklehoard · 7 days
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Aaah. So it's neverending huh.
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fingertipsmp3 · 2 years
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I’ve got this new (and not peer-reviewed yet unfortunately) hypothesis that tall people tend to be more accident-prone than the rest of the population
#like just thinking about my family members; the people who tend to be getting in situations through no fault of their own (me; my brother;#my uncle and my stepdad) are all over 6 feet#meanwhile the people who generally live pretty normal lives (mom; grandparents) are 5’4-5’8ish#my uncle is 6’4 and lives like job from the bible. there was a whole period of time when my grandparents would dread hearing the phone ring#because it was inevitably him experiencing a life-altering emergency#i (6’1) am the family black sheep and nothing seems to go normally for me. my brother and stepdad (both 6’3) are both just plain odd#my dad (6’3) also was perpetually in situations and i think my niece (6’) is as well#branching out from my family; my friend’s stepdad (6’7) seems to have crazy shit happen to him often#like he just got chemical burns at work and she has about a million stories of him accidentally eating edibles and being zooted#out of his mind; or experiencing allergy attacks and taking 5 benadryl#ALSO! i used to be absolutely; unreasonably; heartbreakingly in love with this guy who was 6’3 and the STORIES he used to tell…#that man was a magnet for chaos. if something was happening he was in it#so basically my thesis statement is this: there is something about being very tall that puts a target on your back as far as the universe#is concerned. like nothing in my life ever seems to go smoothly. the only time i have a peaceful week is if i lock myself in the house#and sometimes not even then. i dislocated my fucking knee in my house. like……#feel free to either confirm or dispute my theories. i’m curious if anyone else has a tall butt monkey in their life#or is a tall butt monkey#personal
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sleeperagentclone · 15 days
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"I can't wait around for the owner, I have other places to be" Then why are you still here bitch? Fucking goooooo
#She tells me a “rabbit basket” is being held for in the bathroom#I go back and look for it#Not there#I come back out to get my phone and call my dad and ask him about it#“It's in there” she's pointing to what is clearly the dressing room#I have to move stuff to get to it#The “rabbit basket” is a fucking baby carriage with a giant rabbit head on the front of it#I clearly have some trouble getting it out of the dressing room#She just steps back makes no attempt to help#Anytime I try to look at the layaway tag on it she's like “I paid for it I already paid for it”#Instead of leaving she looks at a tray of rhinestone earrings that I foolishly left on the counter#She is of course only interested in the one's with no price tags but also just wants to know how much they all are#I call my dad he gives me a range I quote her the highest price on that range ($22 calm down)#She asks “Did you discribe them?” how would I have done that? You weren't interested in a specific pair when I called you dumb dumb bitch#I call my dad back#I describe the pair she's looking at now#Guess what?#They're 22 fucking dollars#My dad tells me to tell her that if she wants more in depth prices to come back after 5 when he'll be here#I do so#She like doesn't actually snap but she makes that motion in a grabby hand way while asking me for a card#We don't have any card because we're not a real fucking business#She tells me to write it down on a piece of paper#We also don't have any paper so I have to waste a paper bag#She than continues to stand there and look at the earrings
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myheartxmyman · 4 months
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#it was all too much#you knew and you said the most perfect thing you could have said#but nothing ever happened#you got my hopes high when I was so so low#words didn't match actions#when I had the money to take myself away#I chose to stay with you#I could have given me a well needed timeout#sun and ocean therapy#but I wanted to share this experience WITH You#the thought of leaving for holidays without you crossed my mind but it felt so so wrong and was no option#you knew what I needed but everything was more important#why did you even talked about it?#giving someone high hopes who's barely alive and completely and utterly on their lowest and then not following through is just cruel#I waited and waited and waited for something that was never going to happen#it's painful knowing I had 'the last money' from my father and could have spent it visiting HIS FAVORITE COUNTRY#he would've totally approved he would have been proud#I will never forgive myself for that#I spent his last money during those months I waited for 'us' to DO SOMETHING#I literally didn't care what all I wanted was a tiny holiday and time out together - so we could get much needed distance peace and quiet#I stayed around because I thought we have to leave together so we could get closer again#I hoped for us get close again get that special one of a kind bond back while making new experiences and memories#just the two of us for once#and then you didn't look on your phone those days before new years eve you obviously didn't care at all if I wrote you or not#you didn't care if we would spend new years eve together#you didn't care about us starting together side by side in the new year#you didn't drove 5 to 10 minutes but had the decency of writing 'would love being on the tower together with you like last year right now'#the year started with a lie obviously you DIDN'T MEAN it otherwise everything would have been different#I can still not fully comprehend what happened few hours later you fucking broke my heart my trust our bond our relationship ALL IN ONE#you made me feel worthless (500 euro was worth breaking everything) you made me feel unloved and totally betrayed you gave a shit on my dad
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roturo · 10 months
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⋆⭒˚。⋆ SHE'S BACK!
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GUESS HE COULDN'T KEEP IT IN, SO HE HAD TO KEEP IT INSIDE! ₊˚⊹♡ dilf!gojo satoru x teacher!reader
tags: smut, unprotected sex, breeding kink, exhibitionism, getting caught, he fucks you while he's on the phone, overstimulation, dumbfication, fluff, gojo has an ex-wife, yuuji is gojo's son, age-gap.
A/N: well, this was surely and adventure and maybe self-indulgent title because guess what?, i'm back baby.
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It was a nice morning, he felt clean. Like his life was finally steadying. Even after some stressful weeks trying to get rid of his now ex-wife, he won the trial and kept Yuuji. Poor little boy, just turning 5 years old and he’s already facing all this type of stress. But thankfully he will not be experiencing enduring his crazy mother behavior. Which basically was a gold digger, and a bitch– Not that he would ever say that outloud, maybe with other words? Bastard? Witch? Not that it really matters right now.
He could finally take a break now, just focusing on raising his little boy, and being an old boring 31 year old dad. Life doesn’t sound that bad.
“Daddy! Daddy!,” His son went running to his arms, almost stumbling by himself- clear happiness shown on his face. Quickly, Gojo opened his arms ready to lift the young kid. “Miss Y/N congratulated me on my homework! She was pretty amazed!”
Your name wasn’t unknown to him, Yuuji was very open when talking about his favorite teacher, even though he hasn’t seen you yet- from what he’s been told you’re the kid’s favorite, including Yuuji’s. “I had to talk about who’s my hero, and I chose you!” If this day wasn’t going great, it was now. Because his son's comment just made his whole week, life even.
“Oh look dad!” The little boy pointed towards your moving frame, each time getting clñoser towards them. “Daddy, this is Miss Y/N!” Yuuji kept presenting the both of you. He was really excited to present his two favorite persons to each other- but all Gojo could think of what’s how young and beautiful you looked. He expected someone older, maybe even an old lady with wrinkles and that loving grandma vibes, but what he saw made his heart beat in a way he never thought he would feel ever more.
“Daddy? Are you paying attention?” The little boy gained Gojo’s attention back, face now looking at him again. “I’m sorry kiddo, kinda just zoned out there. What did you just say?”
“Uhh, what was it? Oh! Did I tell you Miss Y/N told me you were a very handsome man?”
“Yuuji!” His gaze moved towards your blushed face, a hand covering part of your face. “I’m so sorry Mr.Gojo, I didn’t intend to say-”
Gojo cut you off before you could continue apologizing “It’s okay, I also think Ms.Y/N is a very beautiful woman.” 
Uh, well. So this is how kinda you found yourself in this situation right now.
You swear it wasn’t your intention! You really tried, you really did, but how could someone say no to Mr.Gojo? And mostly because he really showed his attraction towards you. Sending Yuuji with a rose for you every day, and the little boy was rooting for his dad, because dear god- he did not shut up about him, and how happy he would be with a new girlfriend and maybe one he could call ‘mommy’ and give him a sister. 
That made you blush. 
Not only because the little boy commented on it, and was agreeing- but because it was his dad’s idea.
“You’re so wet, s-shit.” Loud thrusts filled the room, he was fucking you raw on his sofa– waiting for Yuuji’s mom to bring him back, the little boy was eager to come back and ‘see Ms.Y/N and his daddy finally starting to fall in love’
Kids being kids. But, he was right- the both of you were falling in love with eachother.
Gojo throws back his head, immersed in the warmth radiating off your walls and he lets your moans take him to another world. In a haste decision, he slips your dress over your head before tossing it. He mouths at your tits, plump and stiff between his lips, and he hurdles a deeper round of thrusts inside you. 
When you get a little too loud, his hand comes over to clamp your mouth, wolf like eyes staring back at you, “Shut it. You don’t deserve to speak.”
His thin white tee that stays a barrier between you and him does not hide the rippling body underneath that seemed to be sculpted by gods. He presses into you, grunting, using you like his personal sex doll and you embrace it, thrive from it, come to it. Your hips contract, slewing in perfect circles, before having your legs fall gradually lifeless as you arousal drip down your thighs.
“Ffffucckkk- oh baby, would you like that? Be full of me and my baby? Make me a daddy again?”
“yesyesyesyes, make me yours Mr.Gojo-” 
He pays your climax no mind,a smirk clearly showing on his face while he fucks you on his sofa- You could muffle your screams of pleasure easier here. Turning your head back to face him, you notice now he’s shirtless–taut and shiny from sweat like a large set of Hawaiian rolls–before seeing how quick he is to fit back inside you.
“Good girl.” His husky voice resonates and pushes you back into the sheets. “Good girls get rewards, don’t they?” Your poor fucked up mind couldn’t think clearly now. The way your abused and overstimulated pussy was still taking his rock hard cock gratefully inside you was making every feel giddy. A sudden noise bringing back a little part of your senses, Gojo clearly grunting grabbed his what you suppose phone, and answered. Not bothering to stop his thrusts.
“Yeah?,” His voice sounded almost like a whisper because of how breathy it was. “Gojo? I’m almost at your house- Yuuji wanted some ice-cream and bought some for you and… your new girlfriend?” His chuckle interrupted his ex-wife’s conversation, accompanied with a whimper at the feeling of you clenching on him- overstimulation clearly bringing you back to climax soon again.
A slap was heard from his part of the line, an unbelievable laugh coming from his ex-wife line, clearly noticing what was going on and then she finally heard you moan. You couldn’t keep it in anymore, and you were too fucked out to feel embarrased about it right now.
“Finish before I leave Yuuji- Enjoy yourself.” Gojo was so lost in pleasure that he didn’t even realize she hung up before he even processed what happened.
His grunts and sounds of skins slapping are all you hear as he pounds you back into the sofa. It feels like heaven beneath his weight. You were feeling flushed to the touch, but making contact with his skin was like an inferno. He was the embodiment of heat and as suffocating as that could’ve been, it melts you like it’s how it always should’ve been.
His pace eventually falters, followed by a hushed “fuck,” and he empties out into your used hole. The moment he pulled out, a knock was heard. 
“Shit. Can you walk?”
PART 2
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yoohyeon · 11 months
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Saw that the Tumblr icon on my iPad changed so I went to see what’s up and WE FINALLY CAN REPLY WITH THE BLOG WE WANT !!! THANK YOU !!! Now staff make it so when you block someone it’s block on all sb too thanks I’m tired of blocking 3 times
#I’m tired of forgetting to add this is blah blah main when someone somment something on my sideblog 😭#my phone is sadly too full for the update but at least my iPad is ! I’ll answer on it when someone comment ckdnjdnd#now I’m leaving again !#oh I should update that my mom recognized she fucked up (will she learn a lesson though? only time we’ll tell us)#so she apologize my dad didn’t care but he went to get her at work today and they’ve been talking like nothing happen#since they had to go grocery shopping cause the fridge was empty#idk if they talked or they just decided it was better to not say anything and fight again#so I’m happy again don’t wanna d*e anymore until I look for job at least fkdndjdn#which is what I should do but I’m ignoring my problems reading ncjdndjnd#i waited at least today see if my parents were still on the verge of divorcing or not and they seem okay so I guess i’ll check 🙄#pray that I found something nice 😭#I’m tempted to find something that maybe I could work 4 days a week and not 5 but I’ll never find that#cause honestly I only pay for my phone and Sowon food + litter (and vet if needed) I don’t need that much#I did promise them I would pay for Puppy’s pills if I work though cause it’s like 200$ maybe less maybe more even I can’t remember a month#my mom is struggling bad since he got those pills it’s a lot for her small salary#I’m so lucky that my parents let me be even if they struggle but I feel so bad I need to get diagnose soon cause I’m difinetely anxious#and it’s ruining my life#also had to get check for ADHD and Autism words from my doctor for the ladder I’m personally not sure ? everyone tells me no#but those people knows nothing about autism they only person that says there’s ‘’high chance’#is bestie and she study in psychology a little for her field so I trust her judgement way more ! but maybe it’s just a mix of the other 2#that make it seem like I may who knows one day we’ll have the answers#okay I’m talking to much now I’ll go don’t know if I’ll come back soon but at least I wanted to tell you I felt better !#we are back at the normal worries only 🤪#alex.txt
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lillybean730 · 1 year
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im so tired man
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bioblsm · 3 months
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WHAT DOES THEIR CAMERA ROLL LOOK LIKE?
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❀ ꒰warnings꒱. boothill backstory spoilers, not proofread ಥ_ಥ
𖧷 characters. jing yuan, blade, dr ratio, ruan mei, aventurine, sunday, boothill
☆彡 notes. aventurine 🤝 boothill — being some of the most gay ass mfs i’ve seen in a hyv game (apart from bronya and seele) seriously their flamboyance still gives me whiplash…anyways this has been on my mind for months now but i’ve never gotten around to writing it!!! >_<
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JING YUAN 𐚁 景元
[◉"] 2,304 photos, 83 videos
⌖ if you scroll really fast down or up his gallery, all you’ll actually manage to see is splotches of pink, blonde and silver
⌖ everything ranges from cute candid shots of yanqing (he takes multiple if yanqing’s fallen asleep while on duty), to sneaky pictures of fu xuan as she’s working where he’s in the foreground doing peace signs — the final picture of course being her looking at the camera lense directly to glare up at him
⌖ reaching weekends when he’s slightly a little more free or allows himself a small break to stroll around town, his camera roll is either filled with pictures of food he’s eaten or swords that yanqing may or not definitely ask about that he’s now more inclined to buy as he’s seen them in person (he’s a boy dad who loves spoiling his child, alright?)
⌖ the large majority of his photos unfortunately are work related, only really the recent ones being deleted from his gallery to clear up some space
⌖ however, while his photos are preoccupied with either his two kids or random scrolls with messy and rushed handwriting, each video is of you; jing yuan thinks a picture would belittle your beauty too much.
⌖ he needs something a little more real, a little more active and animated to help him quell the chirping loneliness that creeps up on his heart whenever you’re away from him for a prolonged period of time; if he’s feeling particularly mischievous he might sneak a quick but blurry picture of himself to send to you ♡
BLADE 𐚁 刃
[◉"] 9 photos, 2 videos
⌖shit is BARREN. literally a complete EMPTY VOID. if you snatched his phone somehow you’d assume he just got it despite him not having changed it ever since he received one
⌖ perhaps on the occasion you’ll find a cameo picture from one of the stellaron hunters as his phone is left unoccupied and someone decided to blast his entire gallery with their face (silverwolf specifically just hacks into his phone to keep putting random screenshots he’s never taken in his gallery to make him believe he’s taken them)
⌖ maybe sometimes he’ll screenshot different ways to die or health clinic locations he can avoid when he’s fortunately bleeding out but otherwise? nothing.
⌖ if you’re a massive yapper and love sending him pictures, he won’t go out of his way to download them for later usage (whatever that may be…) but he also won’t go out of his way to delete it if it’s accidentally automatically downloaded on his phone — maybe elios intended for it to be there?
⌖ it’s quite nice having a reminder of his significant other where he doesn’t have to actively listen to their voice… that’s a little exaggerative; but he loves just mapping out the features in your face, it helps him sleep just the slightest bit better with no ailment if he’s able to trace your features like a constellation on his blank, dark wall
DR RATIO 𐚁 真理医生
[◉"] 1000 photos, 100 videos
⌖ call it a form of ocd, but he NEEDS to have a decent ratio (i didn’t even mean for this to be a pun i’m so sorry) of his photos to videos; he doesn’t care if it’s 10:1, 2:1 1:5, he needs something that’s at least somewhat pleasing to the eyes
⌖ ratio immediately deleted anything he doesn’t need or thinks he won’t find use in for at the very least the month (this includes every single cameo shot aventurine or you have taken of yourselves on his phone without his permission, which by the way, he didn’t hesitate to scold you two for)
⌖ maybe if he’s feeling particularly loving (when is he ever?) he’ll allow ONE picture to stay.
⌖ his camera roll is purely filled with test results, written exams, student emails he needs to read over, things concerning the guild or the ipc and secret purchases of ducks he’s made (he’s not ashamed, he just doesn’t want you to know he’s buying ducks that are bigger in size every time so he can fill your shared bathroom)
⌖ realistically, maintaining such a perfect ratio of photos:videos is rather impossible unless you’ve got impeccable timing with things you save and delete so, in order to bypass this, ratio made a photo library to help serve as a base number of sorts
⌖ that photo library is of course a secret and locked haven filled with pictures and videos of you, none of which you can even recall taking. all of them hold at least some sort of significance to the both of you, but the ones that dr ratio loves the most is the ones that are just natural
⌖ the ones that show you being yourself, whether it’s where you’re cuddled up near a blanket reading something with a leg hiked up over the sheets or where you’re sleeping with your mouth wide open because you’re sick and unable to breathe through your nose properly; he loves it all
RUAN MEI 𐚁 阮•梅
[◉"] 505 photos, 28 videos
⌖ she tries to keep it as neat as possible; that means no sneaky pics taken of her by you, accidental blurry shots she’s taken (god forbid, those ones are immediately scrapped and done anew especially if related to an experiment of hers) thought that doesn’t mean she clears it in the regular
⌖ ruan mei actively saves any photo you send her, sometimes she’ll even screenshot the chat itself if she finds herself clutching at her heart as she swoons over a few lines of flirting that apparently you couldn’t hold yourself back from due to how much you missed her
⌖ she’s not someone really sentimental so despite having photos of her little cake-cat hybrids, she rarely ever rechecks them unless the trailblazer sent another report on their status to match
⌖ honestly her memory is impeccable to the point she doesn’t even need screenshot reminders of things like dates and experiments saved (would it even be called machine reductionist to call her a walking computer model at this point?) therefore, anything she saves that’s work or science related probably has more intricacies that she can account for
⌖ her gallery is a little boring otherwise. for someone of her morally grey standards you’d expect at least something worth mentioning, maybe even something dumb like a secret recipe she uses to make the sweetest (anti-truth serum…) pastries but no— nothing.
yet the reason for that is very blatant; not even her beloved has the privilege to witness her mendacity.
AVENTURINE 𐚁 砂金
[◉"] 8,793 photos, 777 videos
⌖ it’s a complete and utter mess to say the very least; dr ratio refuses to so much as glance at it whenever he’s near and topaz just gets an ick:
“how do you even manage to find anything?”
“luck.”
⌖ his photos range from absurd, to sweet to egotistical. things that remind him of you such as random rocks he finds, alcoholic beverages that have the same colour scheme of an outfit you wore the night before, an animal he saw that he swears if reincarnation was real would so be you
⌖ he has a specific library for just solely screenshots based off your chats, most of them including a significant amount of “i love yous” and goodbyes that promised a little something more when you met up next; everything that aventurine utterly cherished and craved
⌖ …and then the rest was either him showing the background of him photobombing others, pictures he took to send to you (or one of the ipc members to piss them off, sometimes even the trailblazer for a cheeky laugh) and on the even more popular occasion, all his extraordinary wins whether it be in poker, pool or uno
⌖ compared to his photos, his videos are slightly more interesting. a near 50/50 split that ranged between him telling dumbass jokes to piss off his coworkers, recordings of the back of dr ratio’s and or topaz’s head just for the future laughs (he likes the reminder that he does actually have friends and they aren’t just deliberate hallucinations born of loneliness).
⌖ but of course, all his “favourited” videos involve you somehow. sometimes it’s just a slip of your name while he’s sneakily recording a meeting, him telling you he misses you or vice versa, other times it’s just when he feels like he has a home. you snuggled up on his chest, hands intertwined together as your breathing nearly synchronises with him…moments where he feels as though he could forget the trademark imprinted onto his neck.
SUNDAY 𐚁 星期日
[◉"] 777 photos, 111 videos
⌖ now as much as i want to say “oh it’s all you! he has a special folder for you <3” i unfortunately can’t.
⌖ it’s almost most definitely videos of robin’s concerts, solo shows, videos he stolen off of audience members with good seats when he wasn’t available to personally hide in the crowd…a lot of the photos are also the same way; robin’s promotional pictures, screenshots from her recent advertisements and negative hate comments or news stories that he’s going to personally deal with later
⌖ that doesn’t mean he values or priorities you over his sister, absolutely not. you two are the only people in his life who he would unironically take down the skies and survive utter torment for if it meant your voices were the last things he heard as bellowing winds sliced past his eardrums to tune the world out in order to hear his own final breath
⌖ he tries his best not to be sentimental or nostalgic, as he’s been told as he grew up into the bright and maybe just slightly tragic and guilt-infested man he is today, those things in his eyes are an innate weakness of humanity. clinging onto something thats not tangible anymore.
⌖ but he can’t help but hold on to every video you send him. every picture of you smiling, laughing, every text of you saying i love yous, quoting love songs to him or showing him pictures where you jokingly said “that’s us” (did he tilt his head a few times when you kept sending animals to him with that particular correspondent message? perhaps, but it never made him blind to the intentions).
BOOTHILL 𐚁 波提欧
[◉"] 12,113 photos, 191 videos
⌖ he truly doesn’t gaf (give a fork) about how messy it is, all the things that are genuinely important are already locked and loaded into his noggin’, there’s no point in being frugal with the space he’s been given on a little cellular device
⌖ you wouldn’t believe it, but he rarely uses it unless it’s for emergencies. there’s plenty of trouble that comes around when you’re a galaxy ranger, which means having a constant tracking device on you like a phone that you update daily is a stupidly bad idea; which is precisely why his photo gallery is a mess
⌖ he quite literally can’t go in and clear it out otherwise it risks giving out sensitive information.
⌖ not applicable to you, that is. in boothill’s eyes, you’re an “emergency”. if you’ve texted him, it’s obvious you want his attention, which potentially means you could be in danger and he has to rush to the rescue like the flamboyant cowboy he is (no he absolutely knows you don’t need help, but there’s always that nagging “what if” factor, you know?)
⌖ he inwardly blesses whoever invented screenshotting because it would be an understatement to say that little as half of his gallery is littered with you. he’s just a bit of a boomer when it comes to technology like this, despite being a whole walking charging port himself ehem, so a lot of the pictures he has saved of you that you sent over whenever he cutely pleaded;
“missing ya, send me a lil’ somethin’ wont you?”
unfortunately are uncropped and framed with the outline of whatever messaging app you’re on.
⌖ if he lets you scroll up far back enough, maybe you’ll get to see just a glimpse of how similar his adoptive daughter’s smile was to his
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© BIOBLSM ✮ do not copy steal or repost
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lewisvinga · 4 months
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sneaky link | jude bellingham x sainz! reader
summary; y/n knew it wasn’t the best idea to sneak jude in while her family was out at dinner. but she couldn’t help but risk it despite her overprotective brother
warnings; cursing
word count; 956
taglist; @namgification @louvrepool @locelscs @thehufflepuffavenger1 @minseok-smaus @goldenmclaren @ollieshifts @lavisenri @graciewrote @xoscar03 @c-losur3 @fall-bambi
note; before you all ask no i’m not okay w the kroos news
masterlist !
⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
“Oh shit,” Y/n mumbled as she heard multiple cars pull up into her driveway. She quickly gets up from Jude’s lap and looks out her bedroom window. She mentally curses when she sees the cars of her parents, brother, and sister in the driveway.
“What happened?” He asked curiously, lifting his head from her pillow.
She picked up his white t-shirt and zip-up hoodie from her makeup chair and chucked it at him. “My family came back earlier than expected. Hurry! Put your clothes back on!”
A laugh escaped from his lips as he sat up on her bed. He sets his phone down and catches his clothes. “You weren’t complainin’ 5 minutes ago when you were on my lap and-“
“Yes you’re very hot and as much as I appreciate you shirtless,” Y/n huffed, watching her brother shut the door to his Ferrari. “My brother wouldn’t.”
“I swear he’ll like me.”
“Just because you play for Real Madrid doesn’t guarantee that Carlos won’t go all crazy big brother on you.”
“Yeah but-“
“Y/n!” Her mother’s voice called out for her from the bottom of the stairs. “We came early and brought back dessert. Come down to the backyard!”
Y/n and Jude shared the same wide-eyed look. Whenever he visited especially late at night, the backyard patio was where he usually snuck out since there were cameras in the front door. With her whole family outside, it would be more difficult to get him out.
She hears the back door open and close, meaning they’re all outside. “You can get out from the side-“ She turned back to face her boyfriend and noticed he was still shirtless. “Stop distracting me!”
Jude couldn’t hold back his laugh from her panicked face. She glared at him as he wiped the tears from his eyes, taking deep breaths to try to stop laughing. “Okay, okay, fine! I’m sorry.” He said in between laughs, putting on his white shirt.
“I don’t know why you’re so worried though. I’ve met your mom already.”
Y/n sighed and grabbed her ugg slippers. “My mom. You’ve met my mom. Not my brother or dad.” She mumbled in reply. She remembered the time she brought a boy home when she was 15. Boy did her brother scare him away. Ever since then, she swore she wouldn’t bring a guy around Carlos not until she knew he was ready to see his baby sister be an adult.
“He can’t be that bad.”
She gave him a glare and he raised his hands up in defense. She grabbed his hand as she slowly opened her bedroom door. She looks down the lengthy halls before quietly and carefully dragging him towards the staircase.
“Now, keep quiet because I don’t need Carlos seeing you,” Y/n whispers to Jude who nods in response. They made it to the bottom of the staircase and were about to rush towards the side doors when a familiar voice stopped them.
“Don’t need me seeing who?”
The couple froze in their spots, both too scared to turn around. She felt her heart stop for a second when Carlos cleared his throat again. “Y/n.” His voice was stern.
She gulped and slowly turned around. She stood in front of Jude but that did little due to his height. She was met with her brother's stern gaze. His jaw was clenched, clearly unhappy at the sight of his baby sister with a boy.
Carlos knew who Jude was. Being a Madridista since birth meant he knew every player, especially one who helped them win the league. The Ferrari driver was a fan of the English player, at least he was until he saw him standing behind Y/n.
“He was just leaving-“
“Why is he here?”
“Hello, Jude, nice to meet you,” Jude said with a smile. He held his hand out but Y/n immediately slapped it down. “What? I’m trying to be nice!”
She glanced back at her brother and took a step closer to him. “Por favor, Carlos. No hagas de esto un gran problema.” [please, carlos. don’t make this a big problem] She quietly said. “Has hablado bien de él. No cambies tu opinión ahora solo porque el es mi novio [you’ve talked good things about him. don’t change your opinion now just because he’s my boyfriend]
Her eyes were wide and her eyebrows were furrowed up, showing how much she wanted her brother to be calm about her relationship. Jude was confused as he stared at the Sainz siblings. He only knew so much Spanish and certainly not to the extent of understanding all of what his girlfriend said.
Carlos lets out a deep sigh as he gently pats her arm. “Vale.” [okay] He says after thinking for a few seconds. “So what, is he your sneaky link?”
His words caused Y/n to gasp as the English player bursted into laughter once again. “Carlos! I just said he’s my boyfriend!” She exclaimed, ignoring the feeling of her face burning up as her boyfriend balanced himself on her and tried to stop laughing.
“Why’re you sneaking him out?”
“Because of you!”
Jude takes a deep breath before standing back up straight. “Yeah, sorry ‘bout sneaking behind your back. It did kinda seem like I was her sneaky link.” He said with a smile, gently poking her cheek.
Carlos gave him a glare which made the Real Madrid’s player smile fall. The Ferrari driver immediately smiled before pulling him into a side hug. “Oye, no more sneaking around with my sister. You’re an amazing player on the pitch and just because you’ve saved us many times doesn’t mean I’ll be easy on you for dating my sister.”
“Got it, no more sneaky link meet-ups.”
“Jude!”
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moongreenlight · 1 year
Text
“Realistic Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley headcanons” and then it’s just the fun police.
Mdni. Nsfw below cut.
- It makes me want to scoop my fucking brain out with a spoon when people say that Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley is some shy, anxious soft boy. I really do not believe he’d need to be coddled after a nightmare or babied when he’s feeling angsty. He is fine, y’all. Please don’t call paw patrol.
He is a soldier. He’s a war criminal. He is traumatized to the point of numbness. He is fucked up and weird and insane and honestly I think that we should all let everybody have their thing.
I cannot fix him. I do not want to fix him. I can only make him worse.
- Sorry but I just cannot write him having any kind of romantic feelings toward Soap. I like writing their dynamic more brotherly.
Furthest they’ve gone is ‘locker room gay.’
Like Johnny sends him dick pics on occasion because he thinks it’s funny and it pisses Ghost off.
That being said, I do read the occasional Ghoap fic. I’m not a perfect person. Sometimes it’s just yummy delicious.
- Feel like he’s the kind of freak to intentionally go to the gym without headphones. Something about discipline. Opting to just stare at the wall in front of him while he’s doing cardio or counting repetitions of exercises.
But on the rare occasion that he does indulge himself, he has a playlist of like 5-6 songs he likes and when it ends he just goes back to silence. Divorced dad rock. Chorded headphones only.
- Doesn’t have the debilitating commitment issues as people paint him out to have. Just commitment-phobic. Obviously stems from his past. He’s got that sexy deep rooted fear of abandonment or something horrible happening to people he actually lets close to him. But he’s not completely turned off by the idea of romantic attachments or close friends, just a little hesitant to open himself up to that kind of opportunity.
Probably very cagey about romantic partners. Doesn’t want the guys to know about you. Doesn’t keep pictures of you around his bunk or anything like that. He’s worried it’ll somehow compromise your safety. Worried about you getting swept up in his work.
- Women’s rights? Or Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley? I really do think he’d love to have a partner who lets him provide *everything* for them. He just wants to serve and protect. Wants his bird to be in a gilded cage all nice and safe and reliant on him for survival.
Doesn’t even really like the idea of you going to the grocery store by yourself. Would prefer if you just stayed put and tended his home and cooked him meals and let him dote on you and provide everything you could ever need.
- Has a really strange understanding of technology. He’s fine with the newer military stuff. That’s his element. He can do electrical wiring, set up a TV, install security cameras. That’s all whatever. But a cell phone? He doesn’t give a shit enough to keep up with the new updates and all the new things you have to learn when you get a smartphone. Wishes he would have kept a flip phone.
Texts like this: [OK. See youtonight.]
MAYBE has a private Facebook with no profile picture where the only things on his wall are Price wishing him a happy birthday every year.
His camera roll is like; 97 accidental screenshots of his Lock Screen, a few pictures of him and the task force boys, the inside of his pocket (another accident), a sunrise, a few cool things he found on missions, 34 pictures of Soap and Gaz when they took his phone.
- Insufferable in the early stages of trying to date him. Little to no communication other than basically demanding you meet him somewhere. Texting or talking on the phone? Like pulling fucking teeth. You think he’d rather be dead.
It was a headache getting him to go out in the first place. Maybe you worked at a bar where the guys would come to have a drink after a long day. He’s a little stand-offish but he’s handsome and he knows how to banter well enough for you to be persuaded by a coworker to slip him your number after you complained one too many times about a shit hookup or yet another terrible first date. It takes him nearly two weeks to phone you.
“Didn’t think you’d call.”
“Didn’t think I would either.”
He takes you out once, you think he seems sort-of interested, then he doesn’t phone or text you back for three days. You get over it. A few more dates in. You can tell he’s a bit more relaxed. A bit more open. You’re less worried that you’re a terrible conversationalist. Then he goes on a month long deployment without saying anything in advance. Radio fucking silent yet again. You want to tear your hair out. When he finally gets back, he’ll text you something like [Atthat pub you like. Drinks ?] completely out of the blue. You think you may actually go insane.
- Once he’s gotten used to you, it’s like the sole purpose of his life is to be your protector even if you’ve only recently convinced yourself he may want something casual. You’re small and grab-able. He knows how nasty people can be and what think when they see you. He needs to know that you’re taken care of, kept safe from such a scary world.
So he’ll just linger around you. All the time. Standing behind you when you’re at the till at the store, staring down the cashier who was only trying to be friendly when they asked if you had any fun plans for the rest of the day. Big arms folded over his chest. Looming so largely he threatens to eclipse you without taking a single step forward. Eyes burning a hole into the poor person who hastily finishes the transaction without another word.
Walking silently next to you in the evenings after you’re both off work; close enough to brush shoulders, but that’s about it. Listening to you chirp on about your day. Occasionally offering a small grunt of acknowledgement or a few words of interjection. Always walks on the side of the path that he thinks could pose you the most immediate danger. Shielding you from what may lurk in a darkened alley or a hedge or a small thicket of trees.
Scary dog privilege, but like… for when you go to fill your car up with gas in broad daylight in a good part of town and he insists on standing out there with you. ‘Just in case’ If he even lets you out of the car in the first place.
- AND OFF THAT POINT. I think once he’s decided that he’s actually fond of you, it goes from zero to a hundred so fast it makes your head spin.
Like the last time you spoke, it was still unclear on if you were keeping things casual or not and now you’re at dinner and the waiter just asked him if the two of you wanted dessert and Simon just grunts “dunno. Ask the missus.” ??? He sucks so bad I NEED him.
- As much as I love an overly possessive and jealous Simon, I saw this tweet that said “My girlfriend can wear what she wants because she’s a hoe and I knew that before we started dating” and it changed my life.
He’s secure enough not to need to cause a scene if someone makes a pass on you in public. He understands that you’re attractive and that other people are bound to find you attractive too. (Not that he doesn’t still want to pull their fingernails out one by one, threatening them and everything they love for daring to exist near you. He’s just got better control over himself than that. King.)
He knows he’s better than any of your other options. Nobody else could keep you as safe as he could. They don’t know the world like he does. They don’t know how breakable you are. How sweet and naive you can be.
Not to say he isn’t overly jealous and possessive, he just won’t pitch a fit in public.
LIKE dragging him to the bar with your friends and he sits at the table with all of your drinks. Him watching you dancing out of the corner of his eye, seeing some prat come up and grab your ass in passing. Or a group of guys dancing with your friends getting a little *too* close to you for his liking. He doesn’t do anything while the two of you are out- not wanting to ruin your fun. But that night after you’ve gotten back to his flat (He insisted. Closer to the bar. Uber was cheaper.) and he’s tearing your miniskirt off like it’s personally offended him. He’ll be a little rougher. A little more liberal with the marks his mouth leaves on your collarbones and inner thighs. His strong hands will grab at the fat of your hips a little harder than he should- leaving bruises where his fingers dug in. He’ll lean over you while you’re split open with his length, snarling down at you. “Had everyone’s attention tonight, didn’t you, pet?“ “You like havin’ eyes on you?” “Greedy fuckin’ slag.” “Can’t appreciate what you have.” “Need a reminder of who you’ve got to impress.” Maybe he’ll take you in front of a mirror, massive hand fixed on your jaw. Jerking your face up so you have to look at yourself being ruined by him. How pretty and slutty you look when your makeup is ruined by the tears he’s fucking out of you.
- He calls you ‘bird’ or ‘pet’ more often than anything else. A little on the nose for how he treats you. Like you’re some small, frail thing that can’t go a day without him. Stripped of your natural survival instincts and instead leaning on him for support and comfort and food and shelter. Just how he likes it.
GOD he’s a fucking freak. Gross and mean and fucked in the head. Makes my stomach hurt. I hate him. I wish I was schizophrenic so I could vividly hallucinate him.
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lqvesoph · 6 months
Text
She’s WHOSE daughter?? || LN4
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lando norris x webber!reader
summary: After finding out who your father is, Lando needs some time for himself to think about everything. Oscar is more than willing to help make things right between you.
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 5
masterlist | taglist
Part 4
dad: What’s going on with you and Lando?
You: What do you mean?
dad: Your Instagram
dad: And I saw you in the paddock together
dad: That hug looked a little too intimate for friends
You swallowed hard before turning your phone off, chosing to ignore the messages and focus on Lando who just walked back into the garage, the debrief was done.
"We gotta talk", he stated, pushing his hands in the pocket of his hoodie.
You nodded, wanting to follow him back up to his driver’s room when suddenly an all too familiar voice called your name.
"Y/n, don’t you think you should introduce us?", your father asked, sitting at one of the tables with Oscar’s parents. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes at your father’s teasing. Lando and him knew each other, obviously they’ve seen each other quite a few times in the paddock, especially because he was Oscar’s manager.
"Y/n, sweetheart, how are you doing?", Oscar’s mum asked with a genuine smile, making a small smile appear on your face as well as you replied.
"I’m good, thank you."
Lando eyed you from the side as you stepped closer to your father.
"Dad, Lando. Lando, my dad", you dryly spoke. Lando’s eyes went from you to your dad, giving him a small smile and a nod before looking back at you. "If you excuse us but we have to go", you said, waving at Oscar’s parents and turning your back to the table.
You waited on the couch while Lando closed the door to his driver room.
"Why didn’t you tell me?", he immediately questioned, leaning against the locked door. "I never tell people about my father because it happened too often that they weren’t there for me but for him", you started, fiddling with your hands.
"Not me and I thought you would have figured that. I knew your father, I’ve met him a few times", Lando argued. "What was I supposed to say, Lando?", you raised your voice a little. "We met in Bahrain but didn’t have much contact after that until this week, I couldn’t just go like 'Oh and by the way Mark Webber is my dad'!"
"You could’ve told me", he muttered quietly. "You could’ve told me in Bahrain when I asked about how you know Daniel or at the beach when I asked about your dad’s work."
"It just never felt right", you tried to defend yourself. "Bahrain was just too early and at the beach I sort of panicked, I don’t know", you muttered, realizing you really didn’t know why you haven’t told him until now.
"I need some time", Lando said after a few moments. You nodded and watched as he unlocked the door, leaving the room and probably the track for the day.
*~**~*
"So, what made Lando storm out of here like that?", your dad asked when you gathered yourself and finally made your way downstairs.
"I don’t wanna walk about it", you grumbled, crossing your arms in front of your chest. Just then Oscar walked down the stairs, his eyes widened when he spotted you. "Princess, I’m sorry! I really am!", he immediately said, walking closer to you.
"I didn’t know that he didn’t know but I should have known and I’m sorry", your best friend apologized and wrapped you in a hug. "Don’t be, Oscar. It’s my fault anyway. I should’ve told him. I don’t know why I didn’t", you muttered, your voice sounding muffled from being pressed into Oscar’s shoulder.
"Still. I feel bad", he huffed, pulling back from the hug to look at you. "Where is he?"
You shrugged and looked away from Oscar. "I don’t know, probably went back to the hotel", you replied. "Mark how long do you plan on staying because I could take Y/n back to her hotel", he then turned to your father.
"Oh, I was actually just waiting for her", your dad replied, standing up from the table. "You ready?"
You nodded and turned around to Oscar’s parents, saying goodbye and telling them to meet again tomorrow at the race.
Oscar gave you another tight hug before waving at your dad and letting the two of you go.
"You ready to go as well?", Lily asked, grabbing his hand. Oscar nodded. "Yeah but I need to make a quick stop somewhere before we go home."
*~**~*
Just thirty minutes later, Oscar knocked on the door of one of Hilton’s hotel rooms.
"What on earth are you doing here? I thought you sleep at home", Lando muttered when he opened the door and saw his teammate standing there.
"Let me in?", Oscar just asked, lifting one eyebrow. Lando nodded silently and took a step to the side to let Oscar enter the room.
"She’s really sorry", he spoke as soon as the door had closed. Lando shut his eyes and crossed his arms. "Please, Oscar-"
"She knows she screwed up and said herself she doesn’t actually know or have reasons why she didn’t tell you", Oscar ignored his teammates protest. "She’s never been good with trusting people, so many having screwed her over just to get a chance to meet her dad-" "But I know her dad-" "And that left scars", Oscar continued. "She went into panic mode when you asked about her dad. She never likes being associated with him. She loves him to death but hates it when someone brings him up when talking about her achievements, or in general, when talking about her. She doesn’t just want to be Mark Webber’s daughter but her own person and she really really likes you!"
Lando stayed silent for a moment.
"Talk to her, please?", Oscar then quietly asked, searching for anything in Lando’s eyes that would give him some sort of confirmation.
The British driver blinked a few times, uncrossed his arms and took a deep sigh. "I will, tomorrow", he muttered, bringing a smile to Oscar’s face.
taglist
Please tell me if you want to be added to the taglist or text me if you want to be taken off x
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nathaslosthershit · 7 months
Text
Teen Dad (OP81)
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(Part 1 of the Blind Item Series) (Part 1 of the Teen Dad OP AU)
Summary: Rumors are flying about a young driver with kids
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Seeing the rumor, and various other tweets commenting on the matter, first thing this morning was like getting a bucket of ice water dumped on him. Oscar immediately sat up, frightening his fiancée who was asleep next to him a moment before.
“What? What's wrong? Are you okay?” she asked, sitting up.
“Fuck this is not good.” He mumbled as he looked through more tweets. He knew he had minutes before his PR team started messaging him on how best to proceed. 
“Osc, you are really scaring me. What is going on?” His fiancée asked again. After 5 years together and two kids, she knew him well enough to know that Oscar isn’t easily woken up. While he usually wakes up early to train or help the kids, on days like today where he has the chance to sleep in, he will usually take it. But the amount of notifications he started getting were enough to get him to check his phone and once he saw the severity of the situation he was awake and alarmed. 
“A blind item about a ‘younger f1 driver with two kids he had as a teen’ just went up. No confirmation on who but it seems they have gotten it down to only a few of us. They don’t know yet but I am sure they will know soon.” 
He was grateful they hadn’t clocked in on him but Oscar was sure with a bit more time to dig people would put two and two together. He wasn’t ashamed of the fact that he was a teen dad, not anymore at least. When he was even more so an up and coming driver, he kept it hush because he was nervous being 18 with two kids would lead teams to reconsider where his priorities were, his family or his career. That wouldn’t have been crazy of them to do though, as important as racing was to Oscar, he would always pick his family first. Luckily, though, he had a great enough support system so he didn't have to choose. 
Most people in Oscar’s life knew. Any teams apart from Prema, Mclaren, and Alpine were none the wiser but why would they need to know? Not all drivers knew either, some who he had become closer to were let in on the secret, especially Logan, who had been there the entirety of his kids' lives. Annoyingly, at least in Oscar’s opinion, he has been titled ‘the cool uncle’ from day one. 
“What do we do?” his fiancée asked, snapping him out of his spiraling.
“I imagine it is up to my team to figure that one out. I’ll message them now. Get the kids ready and I’ll be done in time to help with breakfast.” He said as he got up.
After a long, pretty impromptu, call, it was decided Oscar would make a statement about it before it was revealed to be him. He wasn’t too happy about not getting to really do it on his own terms but this is the way it worked out, and hey, Oscar would be lying if he said he wasn’t already planning which race he was going to bring his kids to first.
oscarpiastri
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liked by mclaren, logansargeant, landonorris, and 518,294 others
oscarpiastri This is of course not how I wanted to do this. I had hoped to have more time before I had to let the peace of privacy go but these things happen when you are in the spotlight. So yes, I am a father of two great kids and I have been since I was 18. I am not ashamed by the fact I was a teen dad, and am certainly not hiding my kids out of anything but love. I hadn’t realized I could truly love anything or anyone more than racing but then these two came into my life and I realized I would give it all up for them. Luckily, with the support of their mother (who is my fiancée) and my family, I didn’t have to give it up. My four person family means more to me than anything and I count my lucky stars each night that I have been blessed with them. I ask that you please respect our privacy. This isn’t the end of you seeing the Piastri twins but I, being the over protective father I am, am not ready to throw two 3 year olds into the chaos of the motorsport world just yet.
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Part 2: A Much Needed Interview out now!
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faithshouseofchaos · 3 months
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I just want a driver!male!reader so confused on why the drivers are acting super nice to him. Like the drivers are so horny on main for reader and people (or even engineers doesn't matter who) are telling him why, and he just continues to brush it off. Even when it comes from his bestfriend (maybe logan or yuki). And he doesnt figure it out until he gets kissed by first and second place. (You decide who. Maybe max? But that doesnt seem like something he would do in my opinion.)
The It boy
Social media au + written fic
Fluff slightly suggestive
Word count 366
Various male face claims
This could be better I’m not gonna lie I’m in a bit of a writing funk 😭😭
Your username posted
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Liked by lando_norris4, Pierregasly10 and 1928 others
Your username — back on the podium 🏆🥇🍾
Username 1 — the it boy is back 🤭
Username 2 — finally no more Dutch national anthem
Username 3 — the first picture tho 👀
Pierregasly10 — and I thought I was the only one who had a big dick
Your username— @kika-gnomes come get your man 🤣
Kika-gnomes— unfortunately for us there’s no saving him 😭
Charles_leclerc16 — I need proof 😩🫠
Username 4– CHARLES!!!!
MaxVerstappen1 has posted
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Liked by lando_norris4, Logan_sargeant2 and 1746 others
MaxVerstappen1 — he’s a liar 🤥 he does like cats . Meet Jimmy and sassy’s new dad ☺️🥰.
Lando_norris4 — google how do I become a cat 🐈???
Max_Fewetrell— Lando mate we’ve talked about this
Lando_norris4 — don’t judge me max…HAVE YOU SEEN HIM!!!!
Username 5– I need y/n to put his hands on me
EstebanOcon31– same here
Username 6 — what in the hell is going on with the boys????
Username 7 — their horny that’s what’s going on 🤣
Logan was woken by the sounds of someone knocking on his door. Rolling over in bed he looked at the time it was 3am Logan had one rule: don't interrupt him while he was sleeping. Grumbling, he got out of bed and opened the door finding his friend y/n standing there staring at his phone.
“What are you doing here?” Logan grumbled.
“Can we talk? It's pretty important?” Y/n asked looking up at his friend who looked like he was going to kill him.
“Can it wait till morning?” Logan asked.
“Not really mate” y/n responded. Logan sighed and opened the door up further to let his friend in.
Logan followed y/n into the small living room of his hotel room and collapsed down on the sofa.
“Well what is it?” He half mumbled half groaned still trying to will himself back to sleep.
Y/n looked away from his phone and sat down on the sofa opposite his friend.
"Promise you won't laugh?"
"Depends if you interrupted my sleep for a good reason or not." Logan replied.
“Everyone on the grid has been leaving these strange comments in any post that involves me” y/n said.
Logan raised an eyebrow, his tired eyes staring at the smaller man.
"Comments? Like what?"
Logan was immediately more awake, the fact that everyone in the paddock was talking had his attention.
“Like these” y/n said, showing Logan his phone.
“Lando_norris4 — google how do I become a cat 🐈???”
Max_Fewetrell— Lando mate we’ve talked about this
Lando_norris4 — don’t judge me max…HAVE YOU SEEN HIM!!!!
Username 5– I need y/n to put his hands on me
EstebanOcon31– same here
Charles_leclerc16 — I need proof 😩🫠
Pierregasly10 — and I thought I was the only one who had a big dick
Carlossainz55 — I’d give up everything to be a homemaker just for him…
YukiTusnoda22 — does y/n need a private chef 🧑‍🍳
Oscar_piastri81– those lips are looking mighty kissable
MaxVerstappen1– if I could get pregnant I’d be Y/n’s baby mama 🤷
Logan was struggling to hold back laughter. He knew his friend was attractive, the grid had been drooling over him since he joined 5 years ago.
He knew it would only take 1 good photo for all hell to break loose. He did promise to not laugh though.
"And it's all the drivers?"
Y/n looked back at his friend, his face going slightly red.
"Well no... Some of the team members have got involved...even a few fans...."
Logan's eyes widened. He knew the drivers were down bad but the team members and fans too?
"And what do you want me to do about it?" Logan asked, leaning back on the sofa. Y/n looked down at his feet.
"Well you're my best friend and a good looking guy…. I was wondering if you could give me some advice? Help me on how to deal with all this?" Y/n asked, a slight hint of desperation in his voice
Logan's annoyance at his friend for waking him up was all but gone.
"How could I not see this coming? They've been making heart eyes at you for years."
Logan shifted into a more comfortable position on the sofa, gesturing for friend to come sit next to him
Y/n stood up and sat down on the sofa next to Logan, still staring at his phone, refusing to look up and meet Logan's eyes.
"Mate I’m so screwed." He mumbled. Logan sighed and put an arm around his friend's shoulder.
"You're not screwed. You're an attractive guy. Of course all those drivers are gonna be thirsting over you"
Y/n finally put his phone down the coffee table and groaned, burying his face into Logan's shoulder.
"They’re not even being subtle about it! Lando wanted to know how he could turn into a cat!”
Logan chuckled and rubbed his friend's shoulder. Watching him get so distraught over this was quite entertaining.
"Like I said they've been thirsting over you for years. Lando has had a crush on you since last year"
Y/n looked up at his friend, his eyes searching for a hint of a lie on Logan's face.
"Really? Lando?”
Lando norris was a good looking driver, y/n couldn't deny that. But he was also a bit insane, and the exact opposite of y/n.
Logan let out another chuckle and nodded.
"He's crazy about you."
Logan glanced at his friend, his face red, completely oblivious to the fact that most of the grid was in love with him.
"You really didn't know did you?"
Y/n let out an uncomfortable laugh and stood up from the sofa.
"It can’t all be Lando, come on mate"
Logan smirked and picked up his phone. He knew he was going to enjoy this. A ping sounded as an Instagram notification popped up on his screen.
“What am I going to do?” Y/n asked
Logan scrolled through the comments, chuckling to himself at the ridiculous things they were writing.
“You’re a grown ass man. Just ignore them." He teased, knowing it would piss his friend off.
“Oh yeah because it’s that easy” y/n responded, rolling his eyes and glaring at his friend.
Logan chuckled again, he was enjoying messing with his oblivious friend.
“So what’s the worst one you’ve seen?” He asked, still scrolling through the comments.
Y/n went bright red and he sat down on the sofa again, staring at his own phone.
"You don't want to know." He mumbled, trying to avoid the question.
Logan's eyes widened, that reaction could only mean one thing, someone had written something dirty.
"Oh come on, mate now I want to know" he laughed leaning closer to his friend. Y/n buried his face in his hands, the tips of his ears going red.
"You're gonna laugh at me" he mumbled, refusing to look at his cheeky friend.
Logan was laughing already, he could tell it was going to be good. He sat down on the sofa next to his friend, their thighs touching.
"Come on, it can't be that bad" he goaded, leaning closer to get a better look at his embarrassed friend's phone.
The smile on Logan's face got wider and his arm found its way back around y/n's shoulder. He pulled his friend closer, a cheeky plan forming in his mind.
"Damn they're not pulling their punches" he laughed reading the raunchy comment.
“It’s not funny Logan!” Y/n exclaimed looking at his friend.
“I don’t know man it kinda is… look just let the guys down tell them your of interested” Logan says.
“What am I going to do?” Y/n asked leaning against the back of the couch.
“Join a convent and go celibate for the rest of your life” Logan suggests.
The next couple of days passed quickly for y/n and he spent them avoiding his phone, hoping the comments would die down. But the thirst for him only increased. He walked around the paddock, trying to go unnoticed but being stopped and dragged into conversations everywhere he went. He had to admit some of the attention was fun, Max Verstappen had jokingly commented that y/n was the hottest driver on the grid.
That was until he walked back into the Ferrari hospitality on the second practice day, he had been invited to join the team to enjoy the air conditioning.
As he sat at one of the tables, he was joined by a couple of drivers. He'd just finished a rather heated conversation with Carlos about his new haircut when he felt somebody else slide into the seat next to him. He turned his head to find himself face to face with none other than Charles Leclerc, Ferrari's golden child.
Charles smiled down at the smaller man, resting his chin on his hand. He had the same goofy look on his face that most of the drivers had.
"You know they’re all absolutely crazy for you, right?" He smirked, watching y/n's reaction. Y/n felt his face go red. No matter how many times the drivers mentioned it, he always got embarrassed by it.
He looked away from the handsome Monegasque and cleared his throat, trying to sound casual.
"They’re clearly joking," he mumbled.
Charles laughed, his eyes never leaving the nervous man beside him. He knew y/n was oblivious, everyone knew that he was oblivious.
"Mate you're hot. You were the hottest thing in the paddock last season" Charles teased, resting his hand on y/n's knee under the table.
Y/n's eyes darted to where Charles' hand was resting on his knee. His breath hitched as the older man’s hand slowly crept up his thigh.
“No way” he mumbled, trying to ignore the way Charles’ hand felt against his skin and the heat radiating off the man's body.
“Ummm I gotta go” y/n said jumping up and running off.
Charles chuckled to himself, amused by the smaller man’s panic. He watched as y/n ran out of the hospitality and through the paddock, almost bumping into Lando and Pierre on the way out. Lando and Pierre caught each other’s eye and silently agreed to follow behind the man. They’d both seen the interaction with Charles and had to admit, it was very amusing.
It was race day. The whole paddock was buzzing with excitement; most of the attention was focused on y/n.
He had already been swamped by drivers all morning, everyone trying to wish him luck and joke about how attractive he was.
But he pushed all those thoughts away as he climbed into his car. Now it was just him and the race.
The race went smoothly for y/n. He finished P1, which was an amazing result but it made him happy. He climbed out of his car and was instantly swamped by his mechanics and engineers congratulating him on the race. He smiled, proud of himself for finishing in the points.
The usual celebrations began, music blaring out, champagne spraying everywhere. The crowd were going wild.
Y/n stood still watching the chaos unfold in front of him. A smile on his face. Until he felt a presence standing next to him. He turned his head to see Oscar smiling down at him. “You did great mate” Oscar mumbled, trying to make his voice heard over everyone else on the podium.
Y/n smiled up at him.
“Thanks. You did good too” he chuckled, a sense of giddiness flooding over him.
As the celebrations continued Oscar leaned slightly towards y/n.
“Can I tell you something?” He asked, his eyes wandering across y/n’s face and settling on his lips. Y/n’s breath hitched slightly when Oscar leaned closer to him. He nodded and looked away flustered by the young man’s gaze.
“Uhmmm. Yeah. Of course” he mumbled.
Oscar shifted closer until his chest was almost touching y/n’s shoulder. He could hear the man’s breathing, and the way his breath hitched when he spoke. He smirked
“I’ve wanted to do this for a while” he said quietly, barely more than a whisper.
Y/n shuddered, the feeling of Oscar’s breath brushing against his neck and the warmth of the man’s body seeping into his sent all the blood rushing down to south.
He opened his mouth but was cut off by a set of warm lips pressing firmly against his. Oscar’s hand found its way to the small of y/n’s back, pulling them flush together as he pressed against the man. Y/n responded immediately, leaning into the kiss. One hand gripping the side of the podium and the other grabbing the front of Oscar’s race suit.
They pulled away panting slightly, both men’s faces flushed. Oscar smiled at y/n, his eyes full of hunger and need. Y/n let out a nervous laugh.
“What was that for?” He asked, his voice shaky.
“I had to make sure you got the right message considering that you are so oblivious,” Oscar says, shrugging his shoulders.
“I’m not oblivious” y/n said offendedly .
“Sure you aren’t mates” Oscar says, shaking his head smiling.
Oscar_piastri81 has posted
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Liked by lando_norris4, Carlossainz55, and 3992 others.
Oscar_piastri81 — I win 👹
Lando_norris4— CON-😭-grad-😭-ulations-😭
Username 8 — poor lando 🤣
Username 9 — y/n was and is the most oblivious person to ever walk the earth
Username 10 — it was Oscar standing on his tippy toes for me 🤣
Username 11 — someone check on Logan
Logansargeant2– not even I could see this coming I always thought it would be lando
Charles_leclerc16 — need a third 👀
Username 13 — CHALES NO!!!!
MaxVerstappen1– what am I supposed to tell our children????
Oscar_piastri81– split custody that’s what my parents did 🤷
Username 14– oh my god Oscar 🤣🤣
Username 15 — you know it makes so much sense now if you think about it.
Username 16 — Oscar “heart eyes” piastri
Username 17 — oh he bold bold 🤣
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the things that happened in my life with my family...... I feel like I'm on the Truman show like what is going on here ........
#two instances: first one a cat started hanging out at our house and just stayed out#She had a litter out of which only she kept#And then her daughter had a litter out of which my mom gave away all the kitten except of one#And now there are three generations of cats at my place a grandmother a mother and a daughter#JUST LIKE MY GRANDMOTHER MY MOM AND ME#and their dynamic is so similar to ours#The mother and daughter don't get along and fight all the time the daughter is one trying to make nice#The grandmother intervenes when they fight and the daughter gets along better with the grandmother than her mother lmaooooooooo#AND THUEN TODAY OMFG !!!!!#my dad and i have been on rough terms since he found out i smoke#I haven't quit completely but it's drastically reduced since the beginnin#TODAY HE BOUGHT A SMOKE DETECTOR#and i asked him what's in the Amazon#box he said smoke detector#I didn't say anything because i didn't want to have a conversation#15 minutes later he comes to my room spent 5 minutes just placing it on different surfaces while i was on the phone#And then eventually left it right next to me on my table like 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#Am i supposed to laugh or cry or appreciate his poetic approac#Like ?????????????#like are the people watching the tv show that is my life going oh wow damn that dad definitely a scene I'll gif later???????#What is my lifeeeeee#Jo talks shit sometimes 😭😭😭😭😭#the sentences are messed up because I'm using the Tumblr browser but on my mobile's firefox app
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