#he won't see this bc he has no idea i have tumblr but yeah

[zhongrin]

it's my brother's birthday and 4.2 release today so

may furina wanters be furina havers!! <3

[itsjaywalkers]

ejehehe do ya have boxer james au head canon sorry im new here and just curious

I DO i just . don't know if i can anything new AND spoiler free considering this whole thing started here on tumblr

but !! i don't mind indulging u nonnie, i love talking about that au, and since you're new hopefully this won't seem too repetitive for u <3

reg has always been into journalism but the reason why he decided to focus on boxing is because of sirius!! it was a way to combine his passion AND his appreciation for his brother so it seemed like the perfect idea

as u can see the black brothers have a great relationship in this one and they left home together (but reg still talks to their parents on occassion)

james' trainer used to be his dad since monty was a very famous and admired boxer until he retired but . some shit happened and now james doesn't even speak to his father

sirius and james do not get along in this fic . they're rivals and james is threatening to take sirius' spot at the top so . they're openly hostile with each other and fans always take sides

regulus secretly enjoys being forced to interview james bc he finds him intriguing (and really fucking attractive but that's neither here nor there)

lily and james are sort of friends here bc they used to hook up (they still kinda do when the story starts) and reg gets soooo jealous whenever he sees them together

despite them getting along . there WILL be black brothers angst . considering reg is fucking the enemy

james and reg are always indirecting each other on twitter

james is a Prick in this one, he's my most arrogant james so far and he has . terrible anger issues .

this is one of the main reasons why his relationship with reg is so messy during most of the story (james does grow and change quite a bit throughout it tho)

barty loses a lot of his fights on purpose and lets himself be hurt because he has a very concerning obsession with the nurse (yes evan is the nurse)

barty and james' beef is even more legendary than sirius and james' beef simply bc their rivalry is absolutely unhinged and they lose all sense of decorum or sportsmanshin when they're in each other's vicinity

this fic is gonna be very explicit like . oby level explicit . it'll take a bit to start but once it does.. Yeah

peter and sirius are besties in this one and believe me the irony isn't lost on me

james and reg are caught fucking a few times . and it never stops them from continuing fucking . in fact, james gets even more enthusiastic

reg is trans in this one <3

genuinely considering writing a rosekiller side story in this one bc . i'm kinda obsessed with them here

reg's only friend (apart from barty once he meets him and his brother) is pandora, who's one of his coworkers and the one who has to hear all the graphic details about his hookups with james

she's a lot more interested in the pretty ginger referee she sees whenever she accompanies reg to the matches tho..

i'm planning to be . kinda realistic when it comes to portraying the repercussions of getting involved with a famous athlete (especially considering reg's job) and the whole relationship going public

james' most important ritual/good luck charm involves reg getting on his knees <3 after they start hooking up he refuses to get on the ring without reg sucking him off first

remus is very against james getting involved with reg (even tho he knows that mf is gonna end up doing whatever the hell he wants)

james and remus have been friends since they were kids so despite all the bickering and arguing they're very close

james doesn't wear glasses often because of all the fighting (but reg likes him better with them)

and idk what else to say i feel like i've talked so much about this au that there's nothing u guys don't know already lmao

[sage-knight]

I want to do some kind of year in review. 1) I am far too chaotic for any sort of organized template. These are some of my favorite screenshots I've taken this year. I know I'll never get a ton of notes on what I post, but they've brought me joy. (On the subject of notes, the two most popular posts I've made since I joined tumblr are the most low effort trash and they don't bring me joy, but that ironically does make me laugh.)

Beginning of the year I made an unofficial decision (compulsion?) to focus on my fav OC, my sith inquisitor from swtor. It's become kind of a project seeing where I can stick her. She inspired me to write more, first with swtor then cyberpunk, which is partially why I became so attached. That and I put a lot of myself in her. I will say I have uhhh a weird relationship with my asian heritage? I ended up deleting Ixaphia 1.0 at some point because she reminded me too much of my mom (it was the hair, that hair had to go!) Not to get too real on main, but I think she might have helped me unpack some stuff I didn't even realize were a thing.

For 2024 I'd like to overcome the feeling that I'm wasting my time here posting my little pictures like a sad racoon who is too lazy to make gifs. It's a weird struggle of wanting to share and talk to people but also not wanting to put even the most vague personal details out there. See me, but do not perceive me. It's going great!

As for writing this year, I write sporadically, usually when blorbo thoughts threaten to start leaking out of my ears if I don't get it out. It's not something I share but @meonlyred has been subjected to the p o rn, bc what are friends for. I'm sorry and/or you're welcome. Not ready to put that into the void, but I will throw up the first few paragraphs I ever wrote for my Viktor Vektor fic in hopes that 2024 I actually finish the thing.

Jackie walked over to the punching bag Vik had hanging in the corner of his basement clinic and bounced back and forth giving it a few casual jabs. The man was a hulking fridge of perpetual energy. He sauntered over to some knick-knacks on a shelf and began rearranging them.

“I'm telling you Vik, she won't admit it, but V is sweet on you. I can tell.”

Viktor didn't look up from the equipment he was cleaning. The basic tools of every NC ripperdoc, plus a few he had custom modified for himself. Half the appeal of working back-alley was doing the job better than the corpo wage slaves tied down by miles of red tape. Besides the tiny tremor in his hand, a little souvenir from his boxing days had washed him out of the possibility of trauma team--even if it could be mitigated.

“Nonsense, Viky. You'd be good together! Me and Misty and you two, think of the double dates. Basically what we do already, just make it official-like.”

This time Viktor did stop what he was doing and looked up at his friend over the glasses half-slid down his nose. He took them off and rubbed his temple.

“Jackie--”

He was mercifully interrupted by the metallic clank of the door, before he found himself having to explain yet again why him and V were a bad idea.

“Sorry, Jack. Got an appointment. Still on for tonight? Malone v Hernandez. Fridge is stocked.”

“V will be there too, yeah?”

At the look Viktor shot his way he held his hands up in concession. “Okay, okay. I'll see you tonight. But think about what I said!”

[roxynmae]

Hey I'm the og spider is the bio kid of jake anon and I'm LOVING the responses to this sooooo much!!!

My brain went down the route of in the wreckage of the ships some tablets got washed up and still worked. Jake gets spider to log into his old account to see in it still works (spider has small enough fingers to type) and they log in and it's like all of jake old phone, like videos of the past, old texts, his music library everything and it's like very fun - until norm points out that there is an unread message.

And it's a video message from spiders biological mum, who speaks French or smth (I live the idea that jake speaks French for some reason idk, and she chooses to tell the message in French because she knows none of the other crewmates speak it.) She tells him in the message that she knows what's coming and that she won't drag the baby into being blackmail, so they lied and said that Paz was pregs and that the bio mum was her support when it was born. Had to choose quaritch for the birth certificate bc he was the only man paz had slept with in the right time period. Idk I love the idea that she actually lived and went back to earth, and that somewhere in the message she says 'I know you might not get this but even if you don't know that he's yours I don't imagine you'll leave a kid to be raised by scientists, give him a good life jake'.

And it's just jake blank stare because oh my god that's her hair and his eyes and his mums nose and how the fuck didn't he see this before. I like to imagine a point of conflict being that he tells neytiri before spider

I'm not the biggest quaritch and Spider fan so I don't imagine he would run to him, but I do like what you wrote on neyteyam, and how he would be pretty skeptical of his dad's behaviour. I feel like spider would be much the same once the honeymoon period is over

Idk about neytiri, I imagine she would be pissed but I also think that she would accept him (maybe not as her own kid but as a stepchild) because she still has a feeling that this sort of thing would be eywas will, that the first human child would be born of toruk macto

Jake, I may be in the minority bc spider tumblr loves quaritch, but I think he could be an amazing dad he just has to make the decision to do better and not wallow in his own guilt. He would have alot of work to do, but I think he could do it (if he pulls his head out on his ass)

But yeah!!! Tell me what you think xxx

Wow! Thank you I’m loving this AU so much!

Them finding the message and only Jake understanding is a really good idea! It also makes for an interesting interaction with all the ones around him at the moment. And he as to lie his way out of the situation until he figures how to deal with the situation. The man literally froze into place, all that he himself had done and what he let other do to Spider downing on him. Her last words making him feel ashamed, how could he be such a horrible man?

Now I don’t see her surviving only because why wouldn’t she try to talk to Jake directly? Going to him, telling him the truth, she did all of this to protect their child I don’t see her wanting to be away from him.

I’m happy that you agree on how Neteyam would take the news. The boy truly feels lost at the moment, he grows resentment towards Spider, in his eyes now he lost his spot as first born, the rift between him and his siblings is getting bigger by the day and he truly feels as if he only has his mom left. He won’t even look at his dad in the eyes, Neteyam feels betrayed by him.

Neytiri is constantly trying to forget Jake’s past as a human and now Spider is the biggest reminder. It’s not going to get better, actually I see her getting even more antagonistic considering how Neteyam has taken the news.

Now for the dad situation, I have to admit my bias towards Quaritch, I love him as Spider’s dad and I don’t think Jake deserves this kid, not that he deserves his other children. Jake would need to do some serious work towards his whole family, because in my opinion as things stand he failed both as a father and as a husband.

[acescorazon]

Hiiii not really a question, just wanted to say that I discovered your fics recently on Ao3 and they're all my absolute favourite since then, I'm always looking forward to receiving an email saying that you posted something!!! I just joined Tumblr today and I have no idea how it works ahah but I'm so glad I can follow you there now, because you truly are one of my fav fic writers. Your Buggy is always absolutely perfect and he did not help with my obsession over his character eheh. Anyway, thank you for your good work, and know that the way you write Buggy influences me a lot on how I perceive him and how he acts in my AU (not actually writing anything, just creating little world in my head eheh). Oh and also: it's thanks to you that I now ship Buggy with Mihawk and Crocodile! Since I've only seen the live action, I didn't really know enough about Mihawk and, obviously, nothing about Crocodile; but because of your fics I now ship them SO much. Thanks to you, Buggy has 3 boyfriends in my AU and he's very glad ahah. Anyway, it's a long message for nothing but I guess the most important thing here is: thank you, keep your amazing work <3

I'M ABOUT TO WRITE THE SHIT OUT OF THIS RESPONSE.

Hiiiiiiii bbyyy :((( Thank you for writing me something so nice! I really appreciate it!!! Nice comments and asks like these really make my day and i mean that!! Thank you!!! Tumblr is shit (derogatory) but it could be worse, it could be tw- Jk it's not that bad here and i think you'll like it :) Also ofc thank you for the follow :) Thank you for everything really! I could write an essay on Buggy alone but i won't...not today at least kljlsdjksdjlakjsdasdas. nobody asked but i'm obsessed with the idea of Buggy being a brat and or just a little shit in general which is why i often write him the way i do LMAO. He's a funny little guy, and i love him in the live action as much as i love him in the anime/manga but i think he could be a little more pathetic. i do remember seeing the trailer tho and being like "lol" but two seconds later being like..."Idk...WHY'S HE KINDA..." LMAOOOOO. i don't know if you write or draw but if you do, then you should cook something up. ((We support and encourage others in this household.)) also bestie. B E S T IE. Best friend. i ain't telling you how to live your life but if you have access to the Shounen Jump app wherever you live and you got 2.99 (some of us don't, no hate here.) and if you got some time, then i recommend you read a little story called one piece LMAOOOO. I ain't one of those people who will tell you it gets good in ch/ep 80938423984023984023948 lol. i've liked it since the beginning but thats ME. You ain't gotta read or watch all of that shit to know if something's good and if you like it lmao, or at least that's how i feel. anyways it seems like it takes 80 years to get through but that's really only bc of the pacing in the anime lol, it comes out weekly and ofc the animation studio wouldn't want to catch up with the actual manga sooooo they act a lil sily in terms of pacing LMAO. it's still that bitch in my opinion though, but that's my opinion and you can see that it has 1000+ episodes and be like ..."i aint watching all that shit." LMAO FAIR. IT'S GOOD THO. BOTH THE ANIME AND MANGA ARE GOOD!!! and they both have their pros and cons when it comes to consuming them. ANYWAYYYYYYS. yeah if you have like, time, 2.99, And the shounen jump app is available wherever you are (also u can go to like Viz's official website and your shounen jump subscription will carry through there too :) ) THEN I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THE PIECE!!! (btw you can read 100 chs A DAY of op or they have other mangas too bby YEEEEEE) or if you have time then i also recommend watching the anime its... it's that bitch, i don't know. If you do end up liking it then netflix can help you take a nice bite out of the series, there's also like funimation/crunchyroll... or... *whispers* there are other...ways...to watch the anime....*whispers* ...are you a cop? LMAOOOOOO.

It's really good though with a whole bunch of lovable characters that the live-action doesn't even begin to be able to get into. you didn't ask, you didn't ask, but me personally, my favorite arc is Alabasta, which is the place they should be going to next season in the live action!! it also introduces one of my favorite little villains: Crocodile!!! idk i love it and i love him LOLLLL which i shouldn't bc he's...he's not a good man but i'm 26 i'm allowed to like toxic anime men, i've earned that right. (also you can like things and criticize them/acknowledge their flaws.) ANYWAYS, ANYWAYS, I'M RAMBLING, but yeah, it's good eating, and i highly suggest you get into the actual series if you liked the live action because the series itself is more in depth. Plus, P L U S, there's more Mihawk, Crocodile, and Buggy content AND THATS A WIN TO ME. lajsldajskdajsdlasjd. it's fun and as an added bonus there's a sense of community and you can always come back here and scream your thoughts to me (and everyone else) if you like it. Like i'm honored by your compliments but nothing i write could ever compare to the actual series itself LOLLLLL.

ANYWAYS THANKS SO MUCH!!!! ILYYYYY!!! I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD DAY, A GOOD WEEK, A GOOD YEAR!!!!!!!!!! MUAH!!!!!

[boysareouttonight]

lately ive been seeing some ppl on sunny tumblr/twitter spreading the agenda of ryan reynolds dating mac n dee n also dennis banging him and it reminds me of this fic idea i had for a while but i dont think i'm ever gonna make it so i might as well just say it

dee brags about having a date with this really hot guy who's at the bar n mac immediately feels smth between them the guy starts making eye contact and he just knows there's smth there so later he comes up to dennis n asks him for help to steal him from dee. he wants him to help sabotage their date thats happening tomorrow n dennis says yes bc he doesnt care if mac wants to bang ppl, dennis does it himself n he knows it doesnt mean anything plus pissing off dee is a bonus. so the next day he goes to dee's apartment pretending he wanted to hang out, puts some laxative in her drink n she obviously doesnt go to the date. ryan reynolds goes to the bar to meet dee n surprise whos there? mac. so they go out n dennis is "fine" with it. until he notices for weeks how mac is always with his phone n won't stop smiling n not coming home until the next morning so dennis asks him whats this all about n mac tells him "remember that guy dee had a date with but he was obviously more attracted to me? so we've been seeing each other all this time n i think we're going steady. i think i might actually like this guy" dennis is shaking n almost throwing up n then mac says "i wanted to thank you bc if u hadn't helped me sabotage their date we wouldn't be together so yeah thanks dude". then dennis has his kendall roy breakdown in the bathroom. then he does everything in his power to break them up he inserts himself in their dates he takes macs phone to delete their texts making them miscommunicate n mac is pretty oblivious about it but his bf isn't n dennis feels he kinda asked mac to distance himself a little from dennis and now hes going insane he has no resources anymore. so he does the only thing he can think of: hits on ryan reynolds who ends up being a cheater n they fuck. dennis tells mac like it was the most natural thing in the world saying he got suspicious about him being a cheater n just wanted to check, hoping mac will accept it, breakup w him, move on n everything would go back to normal. but he doesnt. he gets rlly upset n goes "what the fuck is wrong with u??? u're not even attracted to men n u banged him just to ruin my first long term relationship" he obviously wouldn't put 2+2 together that dennis wasn't straight n not even cross his mind that he might be jealous. dennis tells him he did him a favor that he was looking out for him and says "now that i clarified everything will u just breakup n we all move on from this? bc its starting to annoy me". but for dennis' surprise mac doesnt let it go n gets to the conclusion that dennis wanted to break them up just bc he wasnt a priority in macs life anymore n wasnt doing stuff for him like he used to n that he couldnt control mac anymore. he gets rlly hurt about this but deep down also bc dennis had gay sex and it wasn't with him. dennis wants to tell him the truth that he was just jealous bc he loved him n it was supposed to be him dating mac not ryan, that no one could understand mac better than he did n that everything was so clear to him now but he doesn't. he doesnt say anything n just lets mac think that bc he doesnt have the guts, bc its easier to let mac hate him. mac walks out the door and now the cliffhanger n angst is settled. dennis has to do the ultimate big romantic gesture to get him back

[royalsunshinehotel]

Hiiii!!! So I'm super late on the Midnight Mass train but I just spent the last two days binging it, which I instantly followed by jumping on Tumblr and AO3 to look for fics for our beautiful Hassan. Unfortunately, I can't say that took up more than 2 hours of my time: I literally scrolled to the end of the tag on here and there bc there is so little imagines for him. Frankly, you make up about half of that writing, and for that I BLESS YOU 😭 I know you said you're a bit swamped with life and stuff, but if you had the time I'd love if you could bless the tag with a new fic?

Idk how this hasn't been done yet, but can I get a fic where the reader delivers a verbal smackdown to Bev at a meeting when she's acting bitchy to Hassan, and then he shows the reader how much he appreciates her standing up for him when they get home 😜

Thank you for your service on all things Hassan 😘

6:31 PM (Hassan x f!reader)

A/N: I'm so glad to be back! This is a little bit of a mess, but Hassan is here and he's ready to be loved!

The Crockett Island treasury was small, if not totally lacking. You might as well have been treasurer for the student council. This required meetings every Tuesday of the month. More if a vote was taken to have another meeting.

There had been a meeting almost every Tuesday since Father Paul's arrival, all revolving around the role of the Church in the community. You want to tell Bev that she needs to stop trying so hard to drum up business for the church, and it was unlikely that the locals would change their mind.

She should know this, as a local.

You were a part of the population that didn't attend Sunday service, and it had become a point of contention between you and your co-council member, and you weren't going to budge.

Simply put, you find it better to be alone. If you believe in some genre of God, this is your private time. If not, then it's a time to clear your head. Either way, it doesn't involve the mousy redhead, who had been making everyone more tense than usual.

"Finally," Bev starts, "a fantastic new idea from, our newest addition, Father Paul." Bev claps lightly, and a handful of people join in, only for a beat or two.

And you're not paying attention to the meeting, just because Beverly Keane has a talent for losing a crowd.

What brings you back to earth is Hassan. He's good at doing that. He's sitting next to you in the ancient school desks that you were all forced to sit in, due to lack of an auditorium, or any meeting place in town.

You weren't paying attention, and, as usual,

"Isn't that what...your people do?" She gives a pointed look at Hassan.

Bitch.

Ice water seeps into your veins, and you clench your fists. You did have something of a temper, but not right now. Not in front of him.

"His people? Aren't you from Harlem?" You ask, a small chuckle spreads across the room.

"Yeah." Hassan replies, voice soft.

"And so, in front of Crockett's finest, I ask, Madame Treasurer, to fund Father Paul's idea and add Religion to our High School curriculum."

Father Paul, mid-range handsome, and pathetic, stared at the wall, looking for something only he could see.

All eyes turn to you, "Bev, I'm not using town money for the Church's benefit. That's unethical."

"How, pray tell, would it be unethical to help tame our wayward flock? You see these children, with their internet, and TikTok."

"Yes, and I also know the US Constitution calls for a separation between Church and State. And adding bible study to the curriculum is stupid."

"How so?" She's seething. She's perfected the art of hiding rage under smiles and a grandiose tone, but you knew her better than that.

"Adding a bible study to our High school curriculum is not only a strain on a teacher who should definitely have retired, but goes against the US Constitution."

"So, you won't release funds." It's not a question, it's a confirmation.

"No."

If looks could kill...Beverly would have massacred the whole room.

Slowly, in measured steps, you get up from the creaky wood desk, and make your way to the front of the room. Now technically, you were already supposed to be there, but hey, who's paying attention?

You feel a sudden vice grip on your wrist, and the redhead pulls you in.

"He only wants you because your convenient," Beverly dropped the worlds carelessly, just under her breath. You flash for a moment, on the Wife.

Farrah, the woman who's husband you woke up to every morning, before leaving out the window. The woman who's son hopefully didn't know you existed.

"If people need to find God, they don't need to go through you." You shoot back, heartbeat pounding in your ears.

If you had been in high school, you would have dragged her out into the hallway by her stupid braid. But you're an adult, and your...something, is a cop.

"And I think, that's all for tonight folks, right Dwayne?" Dwayne, the Mayor blinks, and before he can respond, "Goodnight everyone!" You practically yell into the small room, before stepping out under the pretense of "beating traffic."

The night is cold and muddy, and you want to forget about the words she said. But you can't. You can't defend what's not yours.

She makes it too difficult.

Beverly's quiet, little jabs, scattered enough to be accidental, but pointed enough to hurt. Hassan. To hurt Hassan.

No, if she ever tried that again, she'd have to go through you.

Late in the evening, there's a knock on the door.

Him. He's comfortable in his jeans, plaid shirt that you want to put your face into, but you have something to say, "Look I know we were keeping this low-key, and you don't want Ali to know, but she's just so-" The Sheriff uses a warm hand to tilt your chin up for a heated kiss.

He's warm. How is he always so warm?

The two of you claw at each other, breathing heavily. Hassan's wedding band is cold on your skin. His beard scratches you in the most delicious way, and Beverly doesn't exist.

This is more than enough. For now, at least.

You realize about an hour later that Hassan came in through the front door.

[lovejustlikemob]

[21:35] sorry, heart

“You’re actually here,” were the only words that Haechan could string together.

“Yeah, I am,” Renjun replies.

“Did you use a map to get here?”

“Mhm. I still haven’t memorized my way around your side of town.”

Silence.

“I thought I’d never get to see you again,” Haechan squeaks out, unable to conceal the lump in his throat that he had been suppressing all day.

---------------------------------

A/N: This is my first fic ever, all fueled by the pain I'm feeling right now. Please be kind to me, this probably is no good but I need my garbage released from my system so here goes nothing.

---------------------------------

Pairing: Huang Renjun x Lee Donghyuck

Genre: angst without a happy ending

Word Count: 1.5k words

Content Warning: mentions of homophobia

Tags: closure talk, non-idol au, author is self-inserting to navigate personal pains but no one needs to know that, not beta read bc this is self-serving

Special Mentions: @neomorning, @ncityrave, and @neoboyoftheweek -- you guys probably won't see this post (I have no idea when you guys last opened Tumblr) but I wanted to thank you for being with me these past few days while I'm fresh from the hurt

---------------------------------

When Renjun broke up with him, it did not come as a surprise.

Haechan knew it seemed too good to be true. He knew that he had been playing with fire, that it was a love star-crossed and destined to end against their will. But, having that knowledge didn’t make the burns sting any less.

It hurts. Of course, it does. It hurts because although he had seen it coming, it all seemed to have fallen apart too soon. Like Haechan was never meant to hold good things in the palm of his hands for too long. It hurts more because he knows that they very much love each other still. That ending things now was the more merciful and yet most unfortunate thing that they could do to prove that love. 

What did come as a surprise, however, is how Haechan found himself back in the passenger seat of Renjun’s car weeks—or months, perhaps? He’s lost track of time—since their last text exchange.

“Hi,” Renjun breaks the silence with a weak smile, nothing like the kind that Haechan has fawned over a million times before. Haechan barely raises his right hand as he parrots a “Hello,” softly enough so that Renjun wouldn’t hear the waver in his voice (or so Haechan hopes). They exchange small talk—about school, about work, about how bad traffic has been lately. 

When they run out of things to say, a looming tension lingers in the air, that of racing hearts and unspoken thoughts. They hear a thrumming in their ears. Renjun’s car has never seemed so quiet yet so loud before.

“You’re actually here,” were the only words that Haechan could string together.

“Yeah, I am,” Renjun replies.

“Did you use a map to get here?”

“Mhm. I still haven’t memorized my way around your side of town.”

Silence.

“I thought I’d never get to see you again,” Haechan squeaks out, unable to conceal the lump in his throat that he had been suppressing all day.

Renjun’s face shifts with growing concern as he watches Haechan wipe a single tear that escaped his eye. He does not know where to start this conversation, but he has already driven all the way to Haechan’s front porch. He might as well begin to suture the wounds that he’s caused both of them.

“I’m sorry for leading you on,” Renjun starts, “I’m sorry for starting all this when I know that my family would never want to see their son dating another man. I can’t keep you around for something that’s never going to work out.” At this point, Renjun almost swallows his words with the way he rushes to get those sentences out.

It’s Haechan’s turn to look at Renjun with worry all over. He shakes his head, slowly, then more vigorously, and places his hands over one of Renjun’s.

“Babe,” Haechan says, and Renjun flinches at the endearment he hasn’t heard in so long, “I’ve told you before, haven’t I? You have nothing to apologize for. It’s not your fault. I could never be upset at you for something that’s out of your control.” A pause. Haechan raises a hand to gently turn the gaze that Renjun couldn’t keep on him and makes sure that their eyes meet.

“You took a risk for me. More than just one, even! You have done so much for me, even with all your fears intact. I wanted to take those risks for you and with you, even with all the odds stacked against us.” Haechan’s lips curve into a smile, one laced with both joy and sorrow at the same time.

The boys pull apart and break eye contact once more. They take a moment to simmer in their thoughts and feelings.

It isn’t even half past four in the afternoon and yet the skies have already gone dark with clouds of gray. It’s almost as if the universe were eavesdropping on their conversation and couldn’t keep itself from being overcome with emotions either. They don’t feel the wind that blows outside the car and pulls the flowered trees into a dance. The neighborhood is still, much unlike their minds.

“Why don’t you hate me—,”

“Oh, I wish I did!” Haechan spits out before Renjun could even finish. He sounds distraught, but there isn’t a hint of venom in his words. He breathes heavily as though he had just run laps around town. The smaller boy freezes in confusion but waits patiently to hear the younger explain himself. “I wish you’d been an asshole instead so I could find it in my heart to hate you. So I could let you go a lot easier,” he tapers that last sentence in a volume just above a whisper.

“Why not, then? Have I not hurt you enough? Is that not reason enough for you to despise me and curse me for fooling you into thinking we could’ve been something more?” Renjun almost begs.

“You didn’t fool me into anything, Renjun. I made the choice to stick around because I knew you would never hurt me,” Haechan’s tears finally break the surface, but this time he makes no effort to stop them from flowing. “You really never did. The world has just been unkind to people like us, and that’s no fault of yours.”

A dull pang strikes Renjun’s chest. He had never seen Haechan this way before. Not in the brief two months that they had spent seeing each other. He’s baffled, really, as to how Haechan could be pouring this much when they hadn’t been together for long. He finds it impossible to grasp what’s going on in the brown-haired boy’s mind. How could he be so kind and forgiving?

“Haechan-ah,” Renjun exhales, “You deserve someone who’s going to make you happy. Someone who isn’t going to keep you a secret.”

“And you deserve happiness too,” Haechan responds without missing a beat, “You’re not any less deserving of that just because you can’t come out to your family just yet.”

It’s not easy being gay, especially in an Asian country. Haechan knows that just as much as he knows he’s one of the luckier few who are well-accepted by their families. He could never force Renjun to come out to keep their relationship alive because he knows how high the stakes can be. There was no way in hell Haechan was going to make Renjun choose their relationship over his safety and well-being.

“Maybe I fell in love sooner than I should’ve,” Haechan admits, both to himself and to Renjun, “But, I want you to know that loving you has been nothing short of easy.”

Renjun caves at the belated confession and wails inconsolably. He buries his hands in his face as he lets out a scream that feels long overdue. He never fully explained his situation to Haechan. He didn’t want the younger boy to worry so much about him. All he wanted to do was to enjoy the moments they shared together.

So now, as they sing a cacophony in tears and in pain, Renjun wonders how Haechan could grace him with so much of the love that he feels unworthy of ever receiving.

He’s broken out of his stupor when he suddenly feels hands weaving past his own, cupping and wiping his face in lithe motions. Renjun leans into the touch of one hand and holds onto Haechan’s wrists. He wishes they could stay this close forever. 

It’s almost as if Haechan could hear that thought because the taller boy wastes no time in closing the gap between them, pulling Renjun into a deep kiss. Haechan moves back, caught off guard by his own rash actions. He looks at Renjun, hesitant like he had just committed an unthinkable crime.

This time, it’s Renjun who lunges at Haechan. They let their lips and tongues and hands do the rest of the talking for them. It’s bittersweet and tear-stained when they do.

“I love you too,” says Renjun.

“I know.”

“But we can’t do this. I don’t want to make it any harder for you anymore.”

“I know that too,” Haechan replies. “All I want is for you to one day find your happiness. Even if it’s not with me, babe,” he punctuates his farewell by letting go of Renjun and sitting back.

Another silent moment passes them by. They didn’t notice the rain start knocking on the roof over their heads, momentarily enveloping them in a bubble where they could be as vulnerable as they had to be. 

The boys look into each other’s eyes once last time. They don’t dare to say anything more, lest they give into their urges and speed off to nowhere so they could live blissfully away from prying eyes.

Renjun can’t help but feel a fondness blooming within him as he watched Haechan awkwardly fumble for the car door, much like he did when Renjun brought him home after their first date. Except, this time, there was no longer a next date for either of them to look forward to. Renjun switches on the ignition and drives off, away from the neighborhood and away from Haechan for good.

Renjun regrets never learning the way to Haechan’s place without a map.

[zackpacklol]

Omori X Undertale AU + Castings

I've seen people draw Omori WITH Undertale Characters, even an entire Comic based off Combining Omori and Undertale, but what about an actual AU of Undertale where it's Omori Characters instead? Buckle in, Boys & Girls. Cause this will be a long one.

Before anything, I should mention: I won't be explaining how Neutral and Genocide work in this AU (mainly because I would like to have functional fingerprints by the end of this) but I will mention how some Genocide Actions will function and maybe even some dialogue if you choose Genocide when we get to the Castings.

(Feel free to skip the story part, it has next to nothing to do with the Castings, Consider the Castings as their own separate thing)

(btw a little side note here: I'll address Frisk as They/Them for reasons I don't think I need to explain)

For the story of Pacifist? Well, let's say that Mt. Ebott was somewhere near Faraway, and after about...let's say 4 months since Frisk frees all of the monsters & Sunny confesses the truth, (yes, they both just by some coincidence do the same thing at the exact same time and date, don't question it) they decide to travel to Faraway with Toriel, because recently, Toriel's been hearing about a Bake off that'll include Monsters from all around the world, unfortunately, no Human contestants or spectators are allowed. Since she wants to go but doesn't want Frisk to be home alone at the same, what does she do instead of having one of her friends come babysit Frisk? Drop Frisk off at a random town called "Faraway" and come pick them back up when she's done at the Bake off, leaving Frisk all by their lonesome until then. What a responsible parent! Don't worry, Toriel leaves Frisk a Sleeping Bag, a portable tent, as well as some G so that they can both buy drinks and food forself.

With that out of the way, let's do some Casting already! Let's start with a HUGE one:

Hero as Sans: I know some people would probably interpret Kel as Sans (bc he's a short king compared to his brother) but there's actually a good few reasons why Hero as Sans would make more sense:

Both have a......charming smile? I wouldn't exactly define Sans's smile as charming, but I think Tumblr would hardly disagree with me.

Both are known for getting tired very easily. Mean, Sans spends most of his undead life asleep, and Hero can barely run for more then ten seconds without huffing and puffing all over the place.

That one scene where Sunny has to choose the taller brother. That whole scene made me wanna make a post like this, for good reason, too! That interaction had "Sans & Papyrus" energy written all over it.

Both can demolish you if you make them mad enough. If you have seen any artwork where Sunny confuses the truth & we get too see the friend's reactions, you definitely know what I'm talking about. There's a reason why RW Hero's only useable weapon is "Hands".

This.

I mean come on, do I really need to explain?

(looking back on this makes feel like matpat lol)

I think that's enough reasons, now here's some Genocide ideas for the "Hero" fight that I think could be cool:

Hero would dodge like normal, but instead of having dodging 50 times like regular Sans, he'd only dodge 10-15 times, meaning once he is tired & can no longer dodge, he gives the classic Sans friendship monologue and offers mercy. BUT BUT BUT-

hear me out

Phase 2?

Yeah, Omori!Tale Hero would have a Phase 2, but what that Phase has, I don't have an idea.

It'd be one of two things:

1. He would "Catch" the knife before it hits him, grabbing it out of the players hand and throwing to the side, resorting you to fight Hero Knife-less until he blacks outs. Once your able to finally black out Hero, you must regain your lost knife and finish the job. (very brutal I know, but hey! So is Omori, so it fits)

or opinion 2, another Brutal one, even more messed up then the first.

You actually stab him in the chest, but instead of instantly dying, he continues to fight you as he bleeds out. (this is thanks to him having the most HEART out of everybody in the main party, which in this context doesn't make sense This path also brings a new-ish mechanic: You can choose to infinity guard until he bleeds out and win, or you can risk it and choose "FIGHT" to speed up this process by literally punching the knife deeper into the wound. Just like how when Sunny was explaining the truth.

WHICH ONE WINS?!!? YOU DECIDE! /j

Anywho, here's some Omori!Tale Hero Dialogue (in only some particular order):

Omori!Tale Hero: Sunny...Aubrey...Basil...Kel...They're all Depending on me...

Omori!Tale Hero:

YOU'RE SUCH A NUISANCE, (PLAYER NAME)!

Omori!Tale Hero:

W-well, I'm g-g-going to GINO'S...

*Omori!Tale Hero walks off screen*

Omori!Tale Hero:

O-oh hey M-mari...want a p-p-pizza......?

(btw the stuttering is bc of the knife in his stomach)

Well, I think I make this multiple parts bc I think if I don't I'm somehow gonna find a word limit on Tumblr. (even if there is one) By the way, I'm hoping Part 2 will mainly JUST be castings, Genocide Actions & Dialogue, ect, I can't promise that.

Click This when Part 2 comes out

[golbrocklovely]

OK but like do you actually think that acc is colbs because they’ve interacted with fan fic accounts do you think colby would do that? i love the idea of it being him but what if it’s just someone trying to be him and fool all of us

on any given day, i go back and forth between if that account is really him or not. i'm always about 50/50, but sometimes more or less.

this is my opinion, and has been since we all started to notice that account: realistically, if it is him, he ain't ever gonna admit to it. that person has written some personal stuff on there (and has deleted some as well) and clearly if that was him, he probably wouldn't want most fans to know about it. that account has also always had dms off and askbox off, so you can't message said person unless they reach out first, and they haven't done that. have they replied to a couple of us under a post?? sure. i won't deny there has been one or two interactions between some of us. however that account has never claimed to be him. while they definitely act like what you would assume would be him, they have never said "hey guys this is colby" so…. worse case scenario, it's a fan pretending to be him.

and my thing with that is, most fans that play that game usually want to be notice. they want the follows and they have open dms with everyone. and usually there's a scam somewhere involved too. it's not just roleplaying or whatever. it's truly trying to make everyone think it's said person until actual said person comes out and says otherwise.

which again, brings me back to the first part: if it's colby, he's not gonna admit it's him. clearly that account is for expressing whatever that person wants to. a hidden account in a way. and that's always been my favorite thing about tumblr - you can be famous on here, but no one cares. some ppl do, don't get me wrong, but over the years famous ppl have come and gone from this place bc you aren't gonna get the following that you would on twitter or insta or where ever else.

so if it's him, just vibing, it would make sense he wouldn't outright admit it's him. and if it's someone pretending to be him (even tho at this point that account has changed it's name, which could also be a sign that it is him bc it would make sense to draw attention away from the account) they don't really do anything and are barely around to be concerning. if they started trying to talk to all of us all the time, then i would see it as a red flag.

also, ngl, regardless if it's him or not, i like the aesthetics of that account, which is why i want them to come back lol

so… yeah. either way, i don't care if it's him or not.

[the-timelord-a-tardis-stole]

I posted 2,971 times in 2022

14 posts created (0%)

2,957 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@knifepatron

@elven-child

@partywithponies

@evilphrog

@lokis-tardis-companion19

I tagged 1,020 of my posts in 2022

#lotr - 172 posts

#lotr newsletter - 128 posts

#dracula daily - 115 posts

#the magnus archives - 99 posts

#bbc ghosts - 86 posts

#rtgame - 76 posts

#the late late toy show - 52 posts

#gaeilge - 44 posts

#goncharov - 27 posts

#ofmd - 24 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#i generally go with the idea that jonah was sick of hiring stuffy academic men as archivists so he chose the angriest young woman available

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I love the fact Sam agrees to leave the Shire like "oh yeah, I'll go with Frodo. And I'd love to see some elves". Then it's literally day 3 of travelling still in the Shire when he gets to meet them. Because it means from here on out, Sam's motivation is 100% love and loyalty

37 notes - Posted September 25, 2022

#4

I had 2 thoughts about Tom Bombadil when we were reading about him:

One of the possible in-universe explanations for Tom Bombadil is that he is God. While this is good idea with all Tom Bombadil's singing and Illuvatar's connection with music, it is way funnier is Tom Bombadil is a different being. Like imagine creating an empty world out of The Void, and you look in and theres just Some Guy Vibing

All his nonsense singing reminds me a bit of that episode of Stellar Firma where Trexel is making up riddles but they end up steadily turing into funny little nonsense rhymes.

40 notes - Posted October 6, 2022

#3

There's a couple of moments that we've read so far that will form interesting parallels later on (spoilers for the first time readers):

The hobbits feeling awkward carrying swords for the first time vs. when they return to Bree and Barliman is like "yeah, of course no one hassled you on the way here, you're all fully decked out in armour with swords" to which the hobbits are like "oh wow we forgot that was actually weird"

Strider and Merry meeting for the first time after Merry encountered a Black Rider vs. when Merry is one of the people Aragorn has to heal with his Kingly Healing Hands(TM)

Sam standing up to Strider when he first meets him vs. Sam's similar but even more defensive behaviour when they first speak to Faramir. I really love this one bc Sam is absolutely willing to challenge some Man who is almost twice his height and is skilled with a sword.

Also, this is less of a parallel and more of a common thread throughout the story but I love the frequency with which the hobbits have been meeting unexpected friends after leaving Bag End. There's a quote from Elrond when the fellowship is being formed about meeting "friends unlooked for" or something (I don't remember the exact phrase) and I love that this theme was set down immediately after the hobbits left

42 notes - Posted October 6, 2022

#2

I find it very interesting that when the hobbits were like "tell us one of the Old Tales" and Aragorn chooses a comforting one in the form of the Tale of Beren and Luthien. In isolation, it's a good choice. There's hope amid hardship and people achieving impossible tasks with the power of love. It's very comforting if you're about to be attacked by evil creatures.

However, with the context of Aragorn and Arwen, you have to ask how many times has that been Aragorn's comfort to himself? How many cold nights in the wilderness has Aragorn spent imagining Beren doing the same thing? Does the successful taking of a Silmaril turn Aragorn's task of becoming King of Gondor and Arnor from "Impossible" to only "Very Difficult"? Or does it turn it into a sort of destiny that can and will be fulfilled? That he won't be stuck roaming the world alone for all his long life?

76 notes - Posted October 7, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

That kid really committed to the munchikin bit

96 notes - Posted November 25, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[icestarphoenix]

Hi yeah I'd like to change my formal opinion of you: you scare the shit outta me. Jesus Christ. Drink water okay good night sleep tight dream of whatever makes you happy but also isn't violent or off putting unless ur into that sorta thing which I kinda hope you aren't cause at first you seemed kinda wholesome but that's also me ignoring that the first post I really interacted with of yours was the one with different states eyes. Which by the way I dont think i ever told you this but that ask that I sent asking about your Team spirit au, I had that typed out in a Google doc because I wanted to make sure it was perfect like I was so scared you wouldn't respond and then you did and it was like!!!! Omg!!! Someone actually answered my voice!! And that's really wild so like, thanks for that. Really makes me happy when I think about that. Also you changed your profile picture and it kinda caught me off guard. Did you change it bc it's better to have art instead of stock images or because we found the penguin. Cause like either one of those is valid unless it was some secret third option in which case I am Intruiged. It's 1 am and I have a headache I'm so sorry about this I just wanted to let you know I really like your art and your writings. They are very fun to read and sometimes I forget that a lot of my ideas that I have about the states started with you so just take this as a "hey thanks for being you" ask but also don't? Like I am just blabbing to you over the phone and it's been 6 hours and you really wanna hang up but I won't stop talki

Just a lil' goofin' and gaffin' on my part, some spooky to poke at the nerves with. @atomivet can run all he wants, gotta get that cardio in. He has very nice art, so I wasn’t gonna do anything anyway. I am just a lil' baby penguin after all~

You were my very first ask, so you made me very happy too! Someone was actually interested in my ideas! And then I spiraled into fandom stuff and now I'm here. I thank you, very much! I, too, have all my headcanons first written down in Google Docs before I make the Tumblr post to make sure that it's as good as can be. Though that still doesn't stop me from overlooking things sometimes...

As for my new face, drawing @atomivet's ask gave me the opportunity to make a pfp similar to the stock image I was using but in my style. So I made the shift. It's a drawn me now! And I see you! From my little window!

Don't ever apologize for talking to me, I always enjoy and appreciate the interaction. Hope your headache gets better <3

[skinni-girls-eat-books]

Thursday November 9th

6am Woke up really well rested! Good!

Got sad when I saw I didn't have any messages overnight. CBT: This is your anxiety plugging emotions into nothing. Nothing has transpired, there's no real reason to feel anxiety, the anxiety is only coming from inside you.

Why hasn't he texted you? He's sleeping and he's a POS you don't need that controlling your energy. You can't control what he does. Reclaim your energy.

What am I thankful for this morning?

- nights rest, stretches, soft blankets, cool fan, and the fact that I have no hw due tonight! Think about that! ❤️

630am I should buy another candle for the bathroom for my showers lol don't know why the last one went so quick

7am tumblr can be a really nice positive space, it's like the only positive social media like that's kinda insane.

8am about to get ready for class, I can't stop thinking about him. I would like to try to not text him today just to see what happens really. I'm afraid he won't notice or not care and just not text me either. Maybe that's what I need. Whatever this is, is clearly not working. Got to leave early enough to get a coffee bc maybe that will distract me. Drink for lunch too, I'm tired of gorging myself and wasting money on food. Just breathe oh yeah I'm going to take a benadryl and maybe that will help with anxiety.

830am I want to text him so bad but I really shouldn't lol. He doesn't care enough to change. I won't say he doesn't care at all, but he doesn't care enough for me to keep doing this. I got an iced coffee and an egg McMuffin :)

11am Daydreaming about traveling over the break. I need to be realistic tho. I know I am able to take off on a flight somewhere but let's be real I probably won't have the time off and money to do something like that. I'll keep it in mind, but I don't want another Disney scenario where I just go completely broke on one adventure, I'd rather do day trips, maybe an overnight if that even sounds like a good idea. I like sleeping in my own bed unless it's for a really good reason tbh. I want to focus on things around here that I don't typically have availability or mental capacity to do. I know I'll have fun regardless. Maybe even do the plasma thing some afternoons or mornings really to fund the adventures I'll have on my true off days. Just thoughts :)

1130am I passed my HIV patient counseling! It says satisfactory in the gradebook! For some reason I can't see my rubric so I started to panic and doubt myself, but now I know I'm not the only one who can't see their rubric, so I'm sure that part is a fluke/ irrelevant :) just breathe and enjoy the passing grades ❤️ if something is wrong, someone will let you know ❤️

12pm lunchtime! I'm getting curry chicken. Journaling is actually helping a lot and made me realize how intrusive and repetitive my thoughts are when I don't write them down. It's like I need a little vent port for these thoughts to fly out of my brain like steam out of a boiling pot of water. Crazy tbh lol.

1pm Ate lunch outside with some friends and it felt great!!

3pm lol I zoned out during the whole Verbal Defense (not mine!) But then he texted me good afternoon so I sent him a picture of my sweet tea, nothing crazy. I won't let him control my evening. I just wonder what is his motive lol. During class I was looking up free and cheap things to do and it's funny how a little googling can come up with a thousand things to do! So much fun to be had in the world :)

4pm he got me looking at my phone for a text back bitch guess what I'm taking a nap just like I planned lmao I'm not waiting around to talk to you wtf. Call me like I asked you to if you wanna talk, I hate this texting shit and he knows that. What am I a high schooler? Texting bs got you into this mess in the first place dumbass. I'm eating a cupcake and taking a nap.

6pm I have woke up from my nap. No messages lol I guess he just wanted to see if I was alive?? Don't know don't care. Nap was ok, cats kept waking me up or micro waking me up I think but that's ok too :) - There's really only one week left of this bullshit I am so proud of myself ❤️ I actually love the idea of NOT burning myself out the last week so that when I leave school I don't necessarily NEED to do that hibernating thing where I feel like shit for 4-5 days afterwards. I'd like to exit my verbal defense maybe take a nap just like I did today to refresh and then shit take myself out for a nice dinner and get dressed up. Instead of getting drunk and passing out, I can do that most other nights after a closing shift 🤣 I want to start my vacay right away with no need to "recover" in such a drastic manner. Let's see if we can make that happen :) I think that also includes NOT avoiding fun things the next week, bc I always avoid fun stuff when I'm stressed as if I'm going to jinx myself, but I think I'm ready to break that curse of "all work and no play." We shall see ;)

9pm A little tipsy but I'm getting my work done :)

11pm I keep wanting to text him because I'm in a GOOD MOOD but when he doesn't reply it puts me in a bad mood....... So solution is simply DON'T TEXT HIM AND ENJOY YOUR GOOD MOOD QUEEN 😂 he's stupid for leaving and he's missing out on this drunken chill fest tbh and one day, I'll have a fuck ton of friends I've acquired through the years of being myself that I can randomly snap my thoughts to and they'll actually reply and care 😂

12am I know I texted him some dumb shit but idc I still feel good and I love journaling and Tumblr. Getting tacos again for dinner bc JFC I did a LOT of dumb shit work today. He's such a loser he can't do shit by himself not even get a taco 🤣 tbh one day I feel like you'll find someone who's gone through what you've gone through and you'll have so much in common and everything will just be EASY. Yeah I'm fucked but I'm not the only one going through this so I know I have an army of ppl out in the world who would have my back in a heartbeat and THAT'S what matters and what keeps me going fr.

1245am What a weird day. I want to keep journaling so bad I think it'll help me alottttt. I texted him a little but it's like it doesn't matter as much as it did previously lol. It's different now. Let's keep it up :)

[singularbluethread]

Omg idk why I feel the urge to post this PUBLICLY. Neither my bf or ...!!!! That guy!!! read my Tumblr.

But omg over last winter I end up falling in love with a friend I've known for a few years (when I met him I felt an instant connection, but nothing developed bc we didn't see each other much and I wasn't thinking of it in that way). I'm still in the same relationship ove been in for the past 6ish years (SO crazy to think about.... 6 years is a long time!! I don't think I've changed much over the years, but I have developed a lot more) so obviously I couldn't really do anything about it (the feelings ARE mutual tho!!!!) and it turned into a big ugly tangly mess.

I knew right away that the way I felt for That Guy was very different from how I felt from my bf, but idk how much that even matters. I hardcore committed to my bf from the very beginning (even though I genuinely didn't care that much for him at first) bc I've always wanted to just be in ONE relationship for my entire life. Silly but it's worked so far (kinda)

Omg I just. I'm gonna skip a bunch of stuff because I WOULD actually feel weird if either of them found and read this (way more likely for one than the other). But anyways like. I waffled and tried to figure out for like 4 months whether or not I could stomach the idea of throwing away my relationship of 6 years that I wasn't (still am not) very happy in (for a multitude of reasons, some kf them very confusing to me) and then my friend went CRAZY. He's still not back to normal and it's just been a terrible roller coaster for anyone who is involved (but mainly for me/his roommates and him; I feel like I bear the brunt of it all)

I don't judge him for having a mental breakdown in the first place; he's always been weird and unusual and sensitive (and wonderful). But I do feel so upset over how he refuses to seek professional help, even after being involuntarily committed to the psych ward, even after being confronted about things he's said or done that were incredibly erratic and unlike him, and even after being told by literally everyone in his life that he isn't himself and that he should get some good help. His eye is a wreck today because he messed with it, and I wanted to help him take care of it because I love him and worry about him, but he blocked me on my methods of communication with him (a common repeating pattern with him... I think he feels heartsick over the way I won't rush a break up with my bf for him, but how can I do that!?!?)

It's just such a crappy and disturbing situation and I KNOW it's my fault. The whole thing amounts to an emotional affair for me, but I don't know how to get out of it. There's so much to it that I wanna get out of my system but it's like 6:30am over here and I NEED to go to sleep soon. But yeah. My fault and I literally feel so horrible about this whole thing because I am a SINNERRRR and it all could've been avoided I think??? I don't know. It's not like I was wrong to have feelings. It's just everything I did after. I should've cut off the friendship once I realized how down bad and how in love I was with my friend. But I didn't and now this mess is hideous and ugly and soooo painful and confusing.

And now of course at this point, I feel like I CANNOT leave the situation because I'd worry myself sick, wondering if my friend would be okay if I was gone from his life. Everything seems so fragile and delicate. I'd be hurt if I cut our friendship off, but I could be strong enough if I knew it WAS the right thing to help him. It'd be the worst thing ever but like... at this point... I can't be with him. He's too volatile and unpredictable and!!! I'm scared of whatever is wrong with him!!! He is not "leave your safe and secure relationship" material... but there is no way to communicate that to him now. He has to heal. I'm afraid of making everything worse by existing and not giving him what he wants (me!) because I haven't come yet to the conclusion that I should end my current relationship

Anyways....

Weird but I think I'll get better about it all if I jsut Start typing my feelings about the whole thing out 💀 I've just been laying in bed crying about it all instead of falling asleep LMFAO

[ravenkinnie]

TW: Drugs, substance abuse, murder, violence, the Punisher

Another potentially unpopular opinion I've seen on here (and one that I'll actually rant about) is that, Jason is the only good vigilante in the Batfam because he kills people (think the direct quote is "unlike those other feckless bitches" and something like "when you get saved by Red Hood, you know that you'll never have to worry about getting attacked by the same person again". I don't know how to explain to people that killing the type of criminals Jason killed in canon is wrong and harmful (thinking about the 80 Blackgate prisoners he poisoned - hmm you know the American prison system is pretty fucked up i'm sure they all totally belonged there /s). Like. Jason killing the Joker is one thing, but he literally hasn't killed the Joker - Dick did that, Bruce tried to, but Jason hasn't. But like some people make it out like oh, Jason being a killer is fine because he only kills people that deserve it - who, tell me who he's killing? Sex offenders and drug dealers seems to be the most common reply. And I won't touch the sex offenders but drug dealers? Have you heard of the War on Drugs? Have you seen what happens when people in power decide it's okay to openly promote the killing of drug dealers? I don't understand why people think it's fine for Jason Todd to go around killing drug dealers, as if they don't have families, don't have other things that put them in a bad situation. There's a reason why cops in the US (idk if they do this elsewhere) use the Punisher skull as their emblem - and if you advocate for a Jason Todd that punishes criminals, don't be surprised when the right wing weaponizes him against minorities and the red hood helmet starts to get painted on cop cars.

I wrote a paper on the Norwegian prison system which rehabilitates and releases even the "worst" of criminals and just... I live in the US and it seems like we (specifically white people) have such little compassion for anyone who commits crime. Even after the War on Drugs, even after we learned it was a scam, people fall for the crime and punishment rhetoric time after time. Like I live in a suburb where people are so scared of drug dealers my mom literally called our neighbor because someone cut through our yard (and she thought he looked high or something idk). Which I get it, my cousin died from a fentanyl overdose, I understand you don't want that near your kids. But incarcerating or killing drug dealers is not the answer, and I can't stand it when people take that stance on Jason. You can try to explain the 8 drug dealer heads in a duffle bag any way you want, but at the end of the day, I think the batfamily fandom needs to be more careful addressing this issue because demonizing drugs/drug dealers/drug users is literally one of the ways the American government destroys black communities.

And to think, the Jason Todd stan that this opinion came from replied to me because I commented on how Jason likes to run around in Dick's old clothes - something that has absolutely no bearing on his morals, other than he's thrifty which is a good thing actually, something like 85% of clothes ends up in landfills. Sorry for the rant, you asked for it. Sorry if anyone who sees this likes Jason Todd and is offended, you're not bad for liking him, he has an interesting story, just please don't advocate for murdering common criminals, specifically drug dealers.

AAAHHH NOO BUT IVE SEEN SOME OF MY MOOTS DISCUSS THIS BEFORE

sorry it's late and fucking hot I don't have the most comprehensive reply dbdnhd and I do acknowledge that at the end of the day this is fiction but opinions real people hold come from SOMEWHERE - and I think we have a very ingrained belief that crime/bad deed has to be punished and that there are good and evil people and good people only do bad things when influenced by evil people which is exactly the core of jason's belief - and that's interesting for a batfam character, a former robin!! I like when him and bruce are contrasted based on ethics but I don't like when it's meant to show that jason is right and bruce is wrong

batman is an extremely popular and fascinating character because at his core lies the idea that systems that are in place to 'protect' people are corrupt and it's down to individuals who can do something to go against them and look out for others - that's something that will resonate with people even if irl solution can't be to dress up as a bat and beat tf outta people shdhhshs

I have two points to make here:

a) I'm straight up a fucking anarchist who lives in the woods, thinks aliens are listening, and doesn't trust the government but I don't believe systems are corrupt, I believe they operate the way they are meant to operate to punish and control the populations that the system needs to be controlled to keep up the status quo - war on drugs is such a good example for that. drug dealer also exists as this boogeyman, this idea of an evil person waiting to corrupt and destroy the good people but the fact is: people don't get addicted to drugs bc drug dealers exist, people get addicted to drugs because something, not someone, compels them to do drugs, because something (literal us gov) introduced drugs to their communities and drug dealers are just tiny pawns in that game. additionally, many dealers are addicts themselves who got roped into selling to pay for their own use or who got pushed into the margins of society so much that drug trade is the only way to survive they can find

there are like, whole papers and books and thesis done on this so I'm not gonna act like I can analyse it in a tumblr post dhshsjsj but yeah people who think jason is right usually show this weird superiority of 'oh batman doesnt get how to fix gotham like jason does' and like... no, jason gets played like a fiddle by the system the way people he kills do, and whatever he does will always just hit the other pawns and never reach those actually at the top, those who are profitting from finding scapegoats

and like, batman comics don't have to address that bc it's comics, you can write small lmao but don't argue that jason is somehow more enlightened than bruce for killing

b) this brings a question of, if we decide that there has to be punishment for every crime, who gets to decide what punishment is right for what crime? cause there's not a single person who's infallible enough to dictate what the best approach is in every situation

and batman works best as a traumatised man who's loves his city sm he tries to work however he can to protect people from corrupt systems and offer them second chances wherever he can bc that's who batman is at his core - batman is not a punisher he is a protector and he should never be pushed into a role of the punisher bc he's not edgy enough

also bitches are so hard acting like they would kill every villain cause rip to batman but I'm different, y'all are too scared to tell the waitress your order is wrong shut the fuck up lmao the closest any of y'all have been to being batman is getting your ass beat behind the club on a saturday by brenda in her boohoo jumpsuit

[aelaer]

Thanks for answering that last ask, lol. I half-expected you were going to ignore it tbh. I was hesitating when I wanted to send the ask, bcs, well, duh. It's controversial af lol. Just wanted to let ya know that you're not the only one with that view. (Great minds alike, am I right?) So please don't stop. Really.

This is gonna be a bit of a rant, and if you feel the need not to answer this ask, due to the fear of causing controversy in your blog, I 100% understand. Dunno if tumblr will cut off my ask so i'm hoping this is sent in its full-form.

I honestly agree that Tony gets maybe a *bit* too much spotlight (especially after the CACW shit and fans picking team tony/steve), and I hate that Stephen is just used as a plot device. I don't get why exaggerating a char's innocence is a good thing. Especially if they put other characters *too* antagonised and spiteful. It's petty. And putting another character in it (refer this as Stephen) as a plot device to make the main char more angelic is just.... idk. I'm only using rather insensitive words bcs I'm on anon ngl hahahahah.

Which is why, when I found your ao3 profile, I felt like you saved my life. Cus like. Idk. It's rare to find fics alike. Not really good with words so yeah.

Also thanks sm for tagging your fics properly, lest I wouldn't have found your works.

Ik some authors who share the same idea with the matter, but either they wanted to reach a wider fanbase by venturing into ships and fulfilling people's cravings (that require an ooc stephen, wince), or they simply don't have the writing capabilities to match their intentions -- like you do -- yet, I'm not so sure.

So basically yeah. Binge read your works this week. You're doing super great. Please keep going or else I would've probably never been here in the first place.

Fucking love your works. Don't hate on me for this if you happen to find it irrational ;-; Though if you do, I'm honestly interested with what you think. Sorry for sending a long ass ask.

Hey it's all chill, my anon friend. I really try not to hate on folks, even when I don't agree with everything they say or do. The world needs more empathy after all. And you've done nothing wrong in this ask here.

I personally don't ignore asks. It may take a month or two to get to some as it has in the past during busy or bad seasons, but I get to them. (I also don't get a ton so they're easy to answer haha.) The only ones not answered are short fic prompts that have taken me over 2 years to get to, which I'd like to finish eventually... some day.

I expanded on the topic about other characters in the last ask so I won't get into it again here, but I will say that unfortunately Stephen is not a terribly popular character compared to many other MCU characters like Tony, Bucky, and Loki. It makes finding fic starring him very challenging. He's also a difficult character to write well, though I applaud folks for trying, truly. It's great when people challenge themselves and don't let the fear of failure or judgement keep them from trying.

Anyone who hasn't written Stephen because they're not sure how to write him, or have written him but aren't confident with their writing of him, I recommend rewatching his origin film in particular as that's often forgotten for what we saw in IW and Endgame. There's also some good video essays about the character on YouTube. Some fanfic of him is good, while others are very bad, so it's a hit or miss there. One shot character pieces that are not concentrating on a ship tend to be more reliable, in my experience, for a better character analysis because the goal of the piece as a one shot is more a character study, and without the romance you aren't looking at the character as part of a unit. You need to know the character before you study how he works as a romantic partner, IMO.

I'm hoping his film helps his popularity, but I do have some fears that it will be drowned out a bit by Wanda. We'll have to see what happens on AO3 in particular, which is where my primary fandom interest lies in this case. I really, really want to see fic that isn't just reader inserts. Totally legit fanfic, but romance is already not my cup of tea and, if they aren't just smut pieces, those tend to be caretaker-Stephen fics which are a dime a dozen with his fics with Tony and Peter. So yeah, hopefully there will be more variety in the coming weeks. Of the action/adventure/drama type. A girl can dream.

I'm thrilled you like my writing. And also my tagging, some of the tagging is very hard to complete with some of the one shots xD but seriously, you're sweet. And you're good. Don't sweat it ❤️