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#he’s just walking down the street by his place
luvsupa · 3 days
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tags: gojo x fem!reader, ex relationship, fluff, angst, takes place after battle w sukuna (he wins), sad ending, mentions of blood, gojo’s lowkey depressed w.c: 1k
a/n: sorry this just came out of nowhere </3
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“satoru?” you call out, squinting through the bustling sidewalks of downtown tokyo, trying to confirm if it’s really him. he turns at the sound of your voice, removing one of his earbuds, his heart flipping as he sees you—this isn’t a dream. you’re really here.
it’s been a little over a year since you two broke up. despite the deep love you shared, the relationship was suffocating. you couldn’t stand watching him come home exhausted and scarred, sometimes with blood on his clothes from the dangerous missions. it hurt too much to see him treated like a weapon instead of the person he is. you begged him to leave jujutsu tech, pleading with him day and night to escape the pain that you couldn’t bear to witness.
but the final straw was that night—when he came home, slashes across his body, his clothes torn and bloodied. watching him limp from your shared apartment to the bathroom made your heart shatter. “i’m okay,” he reassured you, but you knew he was on the verge of passing out, desperately hiding his pain from you. he couldn’t let you, his sweet sweet baby, see him in this state.
“‘toru, it’s either you leave that company or i’m leaving,” you cried, your heart clenching at the thought. his identity was tied to saving non-cursed users, but without that, who was he? he stared at you in silence, and you already knew his answer. you packed your things, his tear-filled eyes followed you from the bathroom, silently apologizing for the pain he couldn’t escape.
seeing him now, you can’t help but smile, even as the memories flood back. he looks healthier, but the scars on his face are constant reminders of his battles. “i—how are you?” he stutters, still in shock.
“g-good. how’ve you been?” you reply, your heart sinking at how tired he looks.
“pretty good too,” he says, scratching the back of his head, revealing the scars on his hands. “wanna grab some coffee? there’s a shop down the street.” your eyes widen, and you nod, a mix of excitement and dread swirling inside you.
as you walk side by side, the energy between you feels familiar yet fragile. you chat about the beauty of the night, pointing out flashy sports cars.
inside the café, you sit across from each other, getting a good view of the outside. he returns with two coffees, and you thank him for paying, though you’d always insist on paying- he declined, he never let you pay for anything when you were together.
“have you left yet?” you ask, your voice trembling as you prepare for the inevitable conversation.
“heh, does it look like I’ve left?” he jokes, gesturing to his tired eyes. you wrap your hands around your cup, feeling the warmth seep into your cold fingers. silence falls between you, heavy with unspoken words.
“i miss yo—”
“i have a girlfriend.”
his words hit you like a punch to the gut. a girlfriend? your heart drops as your expression falters. why does it hurt so much?
“y-yeah, i’m seeing someone too,” you blurt out, hating yourself for the lie. the laughter that follows feels hollow, and he can see right through you.
“baby, you’re such a bad liar—” he catches himself, the pet name easily slipping past his lips. both of you stare at each other widened eyes as he mistakenly slipped up by calling you baby. he really didn’t mean to! suddenly, the air is thick with tension. you both giggle awkwardly, but inside, it tears at you—how much you miss hearing him call you that.
“if i were your girlfriend, i’d kill you for catching up with your ex and calling her baby,” you joke, but his expression remains serious. not a smile nor a chuckle, making your heart race. have you upset him?
“i mean, you were my girl,” he says, and your mind spins. my girl. you can’t help but pout, taking a sip of your coffee, your gaze drifting outside to the busy streets.
just then, his phone buzzes loudly, drawing your attention. you catch a glimpse of “A♡” on the screen. gojo’s expression shifts as he reads the message, a sadness settling over him. he has to cut your time short. you silently whine as the two of you rise from your chairs, cleaning up any mess as you both head out to leave in opposite directions.
but he stops you. his warm hands enveloping yours. “w-when can i see you again?” he stutters, his voice laced with desperation. your heart races, wanting to cry, to leap into his arms and confess your love, but that’s not an option.
“i’ll see you around, ‘toru,” you say, forcing a warm smile. rising on your tiptoes, you place a soft kiss on his cheek as he blushed hard. he tenses, the longing evident in his eyes as he fights the urge to pull you close, hugging you and kissing you as if you were his again.
“and treat your girlfriend nice,” you add, turning to walk away. each step feels heavier as a lump forms in your throat, fighting back the tears threatening to spill.
“will do,” he calls after you, trying to sound upbeat. but as he walks away, his eyes glisten, filled with unfallen tears. oh, how he misses you.
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reshinless · 1 day
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Hear me out..Jealous!kinich x reader smut...also I love your writing style it makes me wanna explode🤭
──── bet you feel it now, baby
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⠀ ۪ ⠀✧ synopsis. you didn't have to laugh that hard at his joke. it wasn't even that funny. he's better, it's fine, he'll just show you how much better he is.
⠀ ۪ ⠀✧ pairings. kinich x gn!afab!reader, !!NSFW CONTENT AHEAD!!
⠀ ۪ ⠀✧ director's notice. posting wip list in a bit plus brief overview of 800 special fic (it'll probably be genshin/hsr :3)
۪ ⠀✧ warnings. possessive behavior (kinich), jalosi /j, kinda ass/pussy eating (see to it however you like, i used no real specific term, reader is blindfolded for some parts, jealous behavior, rough sex, sex itself, y'all get walked in on (be ready for this to be implied into more of my kinich works LOL), establish relationship
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"ahhn- kinich i said 'm sorry.. pleasef- slow down!" your face in the pillows, your words muffled and long gone into the night. the black-haired man's raspy voice spoke from behind— your boyfriend, kinich, of course. "he wasn't all that entertaining, why laugh like how you do with me?"
it was torture to him, seeing how it went from an awkward laugh, a polite smile, to a more genuine appearance to the stupid guy that just had to come up to you while he was busy getting a little snack for ajaw— even ajaw wouldn't comment on how his face looked this time, keeping his own silence as he ate the delicious candy.
"fffuck- he was an old classmate i had at the akademiya- 'm sorry, i-i really am kin-!" he almost laughed at your words. classmate? doesn't mean you should be playfully hitting shoulder like that. or teasing him like that. it's all his, no one else should be able to have it.
you shuddered, what felt like cumming again for the umpteenth time in a row, he hadn't stopped pinning you against the wall, and making you see stars over and over again ever since you saw your "classmate".
"doesn't matter." he groans, finishing inside you once more, your eyes were blindfolded by his headwear, previously on his forehead. he carries you onto the mattress, laying you down a little roughly. "w- what are you doing?"
you shivered once more, feeling warm exhales near your entrance, his cheek resting suddenly on one of your thighs. "all mine, right?" the blunt tone present in his tone definitely made it out as if you couldn't tell him anything other than yes (because it was true). his lips start to scatter a plethora of glossy little kisses all over your thighs, the sensation of getting him to cover every inch of your legs felt like a fever dream.. was this really a punishment?
you could feel his other hand snake to one of yours, which was somewhere on the bed. holding it tight as he started to place wet pecks over your hole. "hhnnn.. kin stop- ... stop teasing me.." you felt yourself moan into his touch, your other hand reaching out for wherever his head was. your fist grabbing at his hair, almost trying to push him into you further.
you felt him groan into you, you could sense he was whipped for your taste. the way you moaned his name. his.. name. "ahh- ahhh fffuck!— kin it's all yours, i promise!" his hand left yours, and stopped lapping at your hole for a moment- you heard a small grunt, and two things landing on the floor.. was he taking his gloves off?!
you could feel him sitting you up with one of his other hands, arms setting you down onto his face, arms locking around your thighs. straddling you over his mouth, as he started to devour what was his. no other guy could do this to you, not without making you feel as good as he did.
shit and he definitely did, the way he made you feel wasn't like the stupid losers who'd try to hook up with you back in the akademiya. or tried to pick you up in the streets. they can't make you feel turned on as much as you did when kinich blindfolded your eyes with something he doesn't usually take off and hear his belt buckle start to come off- ahhh nothing was better!
oh you felt yourself almost creaming on his face just thinking about it. not to mention how good he worked his tongue into you, definitely tasting every little bit, every little nook & cranny his tongue could reach.
he made a small sound, looking up to see you slowly riding his face as is, trying to rub yourself near against his nose. his authorative hold was more than enough to stop you from moving again, one of his palms moving over your stomach to feel the way his tongue moved inside you.
his head busily buried itself more into your scent, glossing his tongue so carefully, making sure you feel it. you started to feel something pool in your stomach- ssshit you were gonna cum again! your hands trail back down to his hair, gripping it harshly again, him seeing signs that you're close, he fastens his pace, licking as much as he could, no longer concentrating on the taste, more on your facial expression.
"ahhn- kin i'm g'na-!" "mmm there it is, such a good kitty." were the words he moaned into your hole, as he gladly lapped up every inch of your delicious juice/cum.
as he placed a kiss onto your entrance once more, he places more than just one kiss onto your lips, making out with you for a bit. letting him taste what he's been tasting for the past hour, the shared, mix of both of your cum.
your lips finally parting from his, your eyes still shut close 'till you feel a fist of your hair being gripped, "not done yet." is all kinich whispers, his voice a little coarse as he continues to kiss you. "all.. yours," you feel him take your hand, putting it over his heart while you both pull away from the kiss, a string of saliva being created. "and all mine, please?" he points to where your heart is in your chest.
his blunt attitude could only make you laugh, planting a kiss onto his head, and nodding to an agreement. "mmm- yeah. all yours."
"you guys are reaaaaaaalll corny! you're lucky i like your partner this time!" ajaw butts in as you laugh, while kinich simply scoffs- looking the other way and burying his face into your chest.
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not as cool as my other works, and it's more cringe if i keep looking back on it, cute request tho !!!!<3333
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lxvsiick · 3 days
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CALLING ON MY ANGEL | PARK SUNGHOON X READER
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PAIRING: troublemaker! park sunghoon x good girl! fem! reader
SUMMARY: She was a sweet angel in his world of darkness.
GENRE: imagine, grumpy x sunshine?
WORDCOUNT: 3.3k
A/N: honestly, i don't know what was going on in my head when i wrote this -- but chase atlantic and enhypen just go together so well ,, anyways this is a story/imagine inspired by the song ANGELS by Chase Atlantic! Enjoy!
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It was late, and the streetlights flickered dimly, casting long shadows across the pavement as Y/n made her way home from her shift at the convenience store. Her steps were light, but exhaustion weighed her down. The night air was crisp, the silence only broken by the occasional car passing by.
As she turned the corner, a group of guys about her age noticed her. Their voices lowered to murmurs, and then, as if on cue, they called out to her.
"Hey, pretty lady, what’s the rush?" one of them asked, his tone slimy and casual.
Y/n tensed immediately, her heart racing as they approached her, their confidence unnerving. They surrounded her, blocking her path, their grins widening as they tried to engage her with flirty remarks that only made her skin crawl.
"Come on, stay and chat for a bit," another one urged, his voice dropping in what he likely thought was a charming way.
"I... I really need to go," she stammered, trying to sound firm but unable to hide the tremor in her voice. Her eyes darted around, looking for an escape, but the street was empty.
The guys chuckled, sensing her discomfort and ignoring her quiet rejection. One of them stepped even closer, his hand grazing her arm, making her shrink back in fear. Just as panic started to rise in her chest, a figure appeared on the sidewalk, heading in their direction.
Sunghoon walked toward them, his head down, the hood of his black hoodie pulled low over his face. Without slowing his pace, he bumped into one of the guys, shoulder to shoulder, knocking him slightly off balance.
"Hey, watch it!" the guy barked, turning aggressively. But when he saw Sunghoon’s face, he froze. The cut on his cheek was still fresh, and the bruise beneath his eye only added to the dark, dangerous aura he carried. His expression was cold, unreadable, and his reputation preceded him.
"Wait... that’s him," one of the other guys muttered in panic, recognition flashing across his face. Sunghoon and his group were well-known around campus—troublemakers you didn’t mess with unless you had a death wish.
The tension in the air shifted immediately. Without another word, the group of guys glanced at each other nervously and started to back off, retreating with hasty steps as they muttered excuses under their breath. They quickly disappeared down the street, their bravado shattered.
For a moment, Y/n stood frozen in place, her heart still pounding. Then, she let out a shaky breath, relief flooding her as she turned to face her unexpected savior.
"Thank you," she whispered, her voice barely audible in the quiet night.
Sunghoon didn’t respond. He merely continued walking, his hands shoved deep into the pockets of his hoodie, his face obscured beneath the hood. But there was something about his presence that eased her fear. Without thinking, she began to follow him.
He didn’t look back, but after a few steps, his pace slowed, just enough for her to catch up. They walked side by side in silence, the tension of the moment gradually fading away. The comfort of his silent protection was enough to keep her calm as they walked through the empty streets, heading in the same direction.
Though no words were spoken, the quiet connection between them felt stronger than any conversation they could have had.
♡₊˚ 🦢・₊✧
Y/n strolled down the school hallway, a bounce in her step and a smile on her face. In each hand, she held a can of soda, one of them a free gift from the vending machine that had decided to be generous today. The students who passed by greeted her with warm smiles and waves, and she returned them just as brightly. Known for her kind heart and friendly demeanor, she was one of those people everyone gravitated toward.
As she approached the quieter end of the hall, where the lights dimmed slightly and fewer students wandered, a faint groan reached her ears. She slowed her pace, her smile fading as curiosity took over. Her eyes scanned the area, searching for the source of the sound.
Then she spotted him—Sunghoon, slumped against the wall, half-hidden in the shadowed corner of the hallway. His head rested back, eyes shut, a pained expression on his face. He looked like he had just come out of a brawl, the bruises on his face making it clear that he hadn’t come out unscathed.
Letting out a quiet gasp, she hurried over to him, crouching down beside him. “Are you okay?” she asked softly, concern lacing her voice.
Sunghoon groaned again, wincing as he tried to shift slightly. “Go away,” he muttered through gritted teeth, his voice rough and tired.
Y/n didn’t budge. She tilted her head, eyes narrowing as she studied his battered face. Then, as if a lightbulb flicked on in her mind, an idea popped into her head. Without a word, she grabbed the extra can of soda from her hand and gently pressed it against his bruised cheek.
He winced at the cold metal against his skin, eyes flying open in surprise. “What the—” he started, only to stop short when he saw her sitting there, looking at him with that same concerned expression.
“Use it,” she said, offering him a small smile. “And you really should stop getting into so many fights.”
For a moment, he didn’t know what to say. His usual tough exterior seemed to falter as he stared at her, completely caught off guard. She looked so calm, so kind, her face glowing in the soft light filtering into the hallway. In his dazed state, she looked almost angelic—like someone who didn’t belong in the world of trouble and chaos he often found himself in.
She seemed to notice him staring and a faint blush crept up her cheeks. Flustered, she quickly stood up, brushing imaginary dust off her skirt. “Anyway, um, I’ve got to go,” she stammered, taking a step back. “Take care of yourself, okay?”
Before he could respond, she turned and hurried off down the hall, leaving him behind, still holding the can of soda against his cheek. He watched her retreating figure, the echo of her footsteps fading into the distance.
As he sat there, her words and that small act of kindness played over in his mind. A strange warmth filled his chest—a feeling he wasn’t used to.
For the first time in a while, Sunghoon wasn’t sure what to make of it.
♡₊˚ 🦢・₊✧
Y/n stood behind the counter of the convenience store, her fingers idly tapping against the scanner as the hum of fluorescent lights filled the quiet air. It was a slow night—until the bell above the door jingled, announcing a loud group entering the store. Her gaze lifted, recognizing Sunghoon and his six friends immediately. They were laughing and talking, their voices filling the otherwise calm atmosphere.
She couldn’t help but smile a little at the sight of him. When his eyes finally met hers from across the store, she gave him a small, friendly wave. But instead of a smile in return, he only nodded coolly before turning his attention back to his friends.
She swallowed, her smile faltering as she watched him walk over to join his group, who were busy picking out snacks and drinks from the aisles. Despite the brief, almost indifferent interaction, she found herself glancing over at him every now and then, wondering what was going through his mind.
A few minutes later, his friends approached the register, arms full of snacks and drinks, still chattering away. She straightened up, putting on her professional face as they piled their items onto the counter.
“That’ll be $19,851 wons,” she said after scanning everything.
Jake shot her a mischievous grin. “Oh, don’t worry, Sunghoon is paying,” he said with a wink. Before she could react, the whole group hurried out of the store, leaving her standing there, blinking in surprise.
Moments later, Sunghoon appeared at the counter, his usual stoic expression in place. He handed her his card without a word.
Her hands felt a little shaky as she took it, swiping it through the machine. The silence between them felt heavy, almost awkward. She could feel her heart beating faster, though she couldn’t quite figure out why. As she handed his card back, Sunghoon spoke up, “So... when does your shift end?”
His question caught her off guard, and she almost fumbled with his card in surprise. “Uh, it ends later tonight,” she replied, trying to keep her voice steady as she handed him back his card.
He nodded, the silence between them settling again as she finished ringing him up. When the receipt printed, he took it without a word and left, the bell above the door jingling once more as he disappeared into the night.
The rest of her shift passed uneventfully, but Sunghoon’s brief question kept playing over in her mind. She wasn’t sure why, but it left her feeling unsettled, a strange mix of anticipation and confusion curling in her chest.
As she finally closed up for the night, locking the door behind her, she stepped outside, breathing in the cool night air. But before she could take another step, her eyes caught sight of a familiar figure leaning against the wall near the store—Sunghoon.
Surprise flickered across her face. “You waited for me?” she asked, her voice soft with disbelief.
He pushed himself off the wall, shoving his hands into his pockets. “Figured I’d walk you home,” he said simply, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
She couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at her lips, warmth spreading in her chest. “Thanks,” she murmured, falling into step beside him as they began the familiar walk home together. Neither of them spoke much, but the quiet between them felt comfortable, different from the silence at the store. This time, it wasn’t awkward—just... them.
And for the first time that night, she felt a strange sense of calm, knowing he was there.
♡₊˚ 🦢・₊✧
Sunghoon walked through the crowded halls of the school, his usual scowl firmly in place. The sound of shuffling feet and murmured conversations surrounded him, but none of the students dared meet his gaze as they passed by. Some even went as far as to move out of his way, heads down, whispering under their breath like he was a storm to avoid.
He was used to it by now—being the "troublemaker" on campus had that effect. But today, the weight of the stares seemed heavier than usual.
As he reached the lockers near the entrance, his ears caught the sound of a hushed conversation nearby. The voices weren’t meant to be overheard, but they were just loud enough for him to pick up bits and pieces.
“...Have you heard? Y/n’s been hanging around with him.”
“I know, right? She’s way too nice for someone like him. He’s bad news...”
“She doesn’t deserve that. What if he rubs off on her?”
Sunghoon stopped in his tracks, his jaw tightening as he listened. They didn’t even try to hide their judgment.
“She’s sweet. She shouldn’t be mixed up with a guy like him,” another voice chimed in.
His hand clenched into a fist by his side, but he resisted the urge to turn around and confront them. What would be the point? People had always made assumptions about him, and it seemed like no matter what he did, that wasn’t going to change. But now, it wasn’t just about him—it was about her. And that made something burn in his chest.
Letting out a huff of frustration, he stuffed his hands into his pockets, turning on his heel to walk out of the building. His footsteps echoed loudly against the floor as he pushed through the double doors, his mind racing with the words he had just overheard.
They think I’m bad for her? The thought gnawed at him. Part of him wanted to ignore it, brush it off like he always did. But this time was different. This time, it bothered him more than he cared to admit.
Because, despite his reputation and the way others looked at him, he cared about Y/n. And the last thing he wanted was for her to be caught in the crossfire of people’s judgments because of him. He clenched his jaw, replaying the whispers in his mind.
They don’t know her. They don’t know me.
With a heavy sigh, he stepped outside, feeling the cool air hit his face. He pulled the hood of his black hoodie over his head, trying to shake off the frustration that clung to him. The more he thought about it, the more their words stung, even though he didn’t want them to.
His pace quickened as he made his way down the steps, his thoughts clouded with doubt. He didn’t want to drag her down, but he also didn’t want to push her away. After all, they had gotten close in the past few weeks. For the first time in a long while, he had someone who saw him as more than just his reputation. Someone who didn’t flinch when she saw him, who wasn’t afraid to be around him.
But if staying close to her meant she’d have to deal with all the rumors and whispers... what then?
With his hands still deep in his pockets, he walked out of the school and into the garden, unsure of what he was supposed to do next. All he knew was that the idea of losing her, even as just a friend, felt worse than anything those students could ever say.
♡₊˚ 🦢・₊✧
Y/n strolled through the school’s garden, enjoying the calm of the late afternoon. The sunlight filtered through the trees, casting a warm glow on the path. As she rounded a corner, her eyes landed on a familiar figure standing by the old wooden bench. It was Sunghoon, and something about his posture caught her attention.
Her steps slowed as she approached, a frown forming on her face. The closer she got, the more she could see the new cuts and bruises marring his face. It was clear he had been in some sort of altercation recently, and the sight made her heart sink.
"Hey," she called out softly, trying to keep her voice steady. "Are you okay?"
Sunghoon didn’t turn to face her, his shoulders tense. He muttered, "I’m fine. Just go away."
The dismissiveness in his tone stung. Y/n hesitated for a moment, her worry overriding her instinct to back off. She stepped closer, her eyes searching his face. "You don’t look fine. What happened?"
He turned his head slightly, just enough to show his irritation. "I said I’m fine. It’s nothing."
The Y/n’s concern deepened, her eyes softening with empathy. She reached out a tentative hand, but he shrugged it off, a frustrated edge to his movements.
"Stop asking," he snapped, his voice harsh. "I don’t need you to worry about me."
The words were like a slap in the face. Y/n felt a mix of confusion and hurt. Why was he pushing her away like this? She couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t let her help, why he was so determined to shut her out.
"Please," she said quietly, her voice almost a whisper now. "Let me help."
But he was already turning away, storming off down the path with a heavy, deliberate pace. The back of his hoodie was the only thing she could see as he walked away, the anger and frustration radiating from his form.
Y/n stood there, rooted to the spot. The tranquil garden seemed to mock her as she watched him go. The gentle rustling of leaves felt distant, and the beauty of the afternoon was lost on her. Her heart ached, both for him and for the rift that was growing between them.
She wanted to chase after him, to bridge the gap he was so determined to create, but something held her back. She felt helpless and confused, the worry for him battling with the sting of his rejection. All she could do was watch as he disappeared into the distance, leaving her standing there with a sinking feeling in her chest.
She sighed heavily, her emotions a tangled mess. As the garden’s serenity settled back around her, she finally turned and walked away, her steps slow and heavy, her mind racing with unanswered questions.
♡₊˚ 🦢・₊✧
The clock on Y/n's bedside table ticked softly as she lay sprawled on her bed, scrolling through her phone. The room was dimly lit by the soft glow of her bedside lamp, creating a cozy, almost ethereal atmosphere. Her thumb paused over the screen as a new message notification popped up.
Curious, she tapped on the message from Sunghoon: 
"Can we meet at the park? I need to talk to you."
She hesitated for a moment, a flicker of worry crossing her face. Despite the late hour, something about the message made her heart race. Quickly, she threw on a white cardigan over her pajamas, the light fabric falling gracefully as she shrugged it on. Taking a deep breath, she headed out into the cool night air.
The park was a short walk away, and the streets were quiet, save for the occasional rustle of leaves. As she arrived, the park’s lone streetlamp cast a warm, golden glow over the pathway. Her eyes searched the area until they landed on Sunghoon, who was standing by the old wooden bench. The lamp illuminated his face, and he looked up as she approached.
The sight of her, framed by the soft light of the streetlamp, took his breath away. The white cardigan contrasted with her long, dark hair, giving her an almost angelic appearance. His heart ached as he saw her—beautiful, serene, and entirely too good for the mess he felt he had become.
When she reached him, he didn't say a word. Instead, he closed the distance between them and pulled her into a tight hug. The embrace was warm and comforting, and Y/n hesitated only for a moment before wrapping her arms around him in return.
"What's going on?" she asked softly, her voice muffled by his shoulder. "Why did you want to see me?"
Sunghoon buried his face in her hair, his voice barely audible as he mumbled, "I just... I needed to see you. I’m sorry for how I acted the other day. I was wrong to push you away."
The sincerity in his voice made her heart ache. She could feel the tension in his body, the regret in his touch. She held him a little tighter, her own feelings swirling—relief, concern, and an overwhelming sense of compassion.
"Why didn't you just tell me what was going on?" she asked, her voice trembling slightly.
He sighed, pulling back just enough to look into her eyes. The shadows of the night danced across his face, but the vulnerability in his gaze was unmistakable. "I didn’t want to drag you into my problems. I thought it would be better if I handled it alone."
Y/n shook her head, her eyes filled with empathy. "You don’t have to go through things alone. I’m here for you, no matter what."
A faint smile touched his lips, a glimmer of hope breaking through his troubled expression. "I know now. I should have known better."
They stood there for a moment, the silence between them filled with unspoken words and emotions. The cool night air seemed to hold its breath as they embraced again, the world outside fading away.
"Thank you for coming," he said softly, his voice a gentle murmur.
She smiled up at him, her heart lighter despite the heavy conversation. "I’ll always come when you need me."
As they stood together under the streetlamp’s warm glow, it felt as though the night had woven a fragile thread of understanding and connection between them—one that would help mend the rift that had formed.
♡₊˚ 🦢・₊✧
MASTERLIST
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© ALL RIGHTS RESERVED, lxvsiick, 2024
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Like it all started when you and some friends decided to do some urban exploration, visiting a broken abandoned military base. Now while there your friends are of course being dumb, touching things with bare hands, no face coverings to protect them from whatever harmful things could be in the air, respect for the possible dead is on floor level with them. You on the other hand, you got gloves, a face mask just in case, you're apologizing to anything you bump into. You did the research, this place went down from an unexpected attack, so there might be a corpse around somewhere (or lingering spirit). You give a short prayer to anything that looks like a corpse, regardless if you follow in those beliefs or now; you just want to be respectful to the dead. And yes, this place is haunted. Obviously. Now the important part, at one point or another 4 damned souls have clung to you. You dont notice at first, you barely feel that buzz that you're being watched. But the first unnatural thing to happen to you starts in a dream, a weirdly detailed dream. You're a housewife in the 50s. Cute summer dress, lovely home, nice street. But it feels too real, the patterns on the walls stay perfect no matter how long you stare at them, you can read lines from books you've never seen before, you look at your hands and they don't look distorted like they usually are in dreams. Then a man walks through your front door like he owns the place, you don't recognise him. At all. Yet he speaks to you in such a nice rough voice from his cigars, calling you such sweet things. Treating you like his wife. Then after what felt like hours from playing housewife you wake up, confused to hell and back. You brush it off until the next night, where you're sucked into another oddly very detailed dream, but its so different. From housewife in the 50s to maiden in the ye old times. The man is different, instead of tough, friendly bearded husband, you now have dark knight with skull markings. Helmet stays on at all times, but despite the rough and scary armour and vibe, he treats you like you're the finest silk, the sweetest flower, like you'll shatter if he so much as looks at you wrong. And after living through that you wake up once again incredibly confused. Is this what the backrooms feel like? You don't know, you don't want to know. Night rolls around once more which you dread and sure enough another weird dream with a new life. Now, at a farmland on the outskirts of an old styled town, you got chickens, goats, two cows, some ducks and a bulky husband with a silly mohawk. You don't know what year it is, what century you're at, at this point you're just rolling with it. Husband got a nice accent, Scottish you might think it is. He's absolutely spoiling you, treating you like a princess for no reason. Not like you're complaining. After that dream, you wake up contemplating that you might be losing your mind. But no, you're just being haunted by demons who like spending time with you through your dreams. Moving on. 4th weird dream, this feels further up into recent years, maybe 2000s. Cute husband, looks like a sweetheart, is a sweetheart. His skin is darker from the other ones, but not like you could tell with Sir Skull and Bones. He has a smooth voice, could probably sweet talk a bear. Time with him was almost too sweet. You swore his pupils nearly went heart shaped when he looks at you. And like the rest of them, you wake up confused. And thats just how your nights go, things in the day go.. strangely.
Oh and quick reminder, don't run from them.
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jksarchives · 2 days
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BY YOUR SIDE
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PAIRING; jungkook x reader
GENRE; f2l, fwb, angst, fluff
TAGS/WARNINGS; friends with benefits, best friends to lovers, domestic violence (not by jk), oc has panic attacks, violence, blood, injuries, hurt/comfort, fluff, implied smut, lots of crying, jk is very protective of oc
WORD COUNT; 7.9k
𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯! 𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘵𝘴 𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘯𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘪𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦!l
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SYNOPSIS;
The question is, when do the lines blur between love and friendship?
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𐚁₊⊹
The rain fell cold and heavily, the city painted in shades of silver and black. Streetlights flickered weakly, with their light barely visible through the rain. The night was filled with the sound of raindrops splattering against the concrete, mixed with unsettling rumbles of distant thunder.
You walked alone through the deserted streets at a slow pace, your steps heavy and staggering. Your shoes were soaked through, and they made soft, wet thuds with every movement, as if they were too tired to lift you any longer.
Tears streamed down your face, but they were indistinguishable from the rain that soaked your pale skin. They fell silently, lost in the deluge, as though the sky wept with you. Your breaths were shallow, with uneven gasps, the kind that follow after too much crying and not enough sleep.
The world around you was a blur, the cityscape fading into a mass of blackness cut through by neon signs and faint headlights far in the distance. Cars passed by occasionally, their drivers unaware of your lone figure travelling through the storm.
You were invisible in the rain, a shadow that slipped between those gaps of the night. Your hands hung loosely at your sides, your fingers trembling from the cold or possibly from intern distress.
Every so often, you paused, your body swaying slightly as though on the edge of collapse. But then you would begin again, dragging yourself forward, one step at a time, with no clear direction, no place to go. There was only the movement, the motion of walking that somehow seemed easier than standing still and feeling everything.
But it was comfort that you really sought. It was what you needed right now more than anything.
And so, you let your feet do the walking. Then soon, you found yourself standing before a familiar house, a place that held endless memories of laughter — and intimacy. You summoned the courage to ring the doorbell, your heart pounding in your chest.
The door soon creaked open, and you were met by the face of a man you had known for years — your best friend. Or someone more.
You didn’t know anymore. You’d been through so much together, shared countless moments — some joyful, some painful. Somewhere along the way, things had gotten messy. Emotions had blurred lines, but neither had the courage to define what they were. He wasn’t just your friend, but also wasn’t fully yours. That space between was confusing, painful. You didn’t know how to label what you had, and maybe that’s what scared you most of all.
“Y/n?” he frowned. There he stood, shirtless, his hair wet with droplets cascading down his defined abs. His eyes widened in surprise and concern looking at your distraught state.
“Jungkook” your voice trembled as you felt yourself choking up. Without hesitation, he quickly grabbed your hand and pulled you inside, closing the door behind him.
He cupped your tear-streaked face in his hands, his touch warm, gentle and reassuring. His worried and curious eyes met yours, “what’s wrong?” he asked, his voice a soft murmur.
Your lips trembled as you tried to find the words to express the storm raging inside you, the turmoil that had driven you to seek comfort at his doorstep. In the dim light of the entryway, his gaze fell upon a faint bruise marred against your skin. His heart clenched, a mixture of anger and worry welling up within him. His fingers brushed over the discolored mark with the utmost tenderness, but you winced in pain, causing him to retract his hand immediately.
“Y/n, who did this?” he asked, his voice firm.
The question hung in the air heavily. You bit your trembling lip, desperately trying to hold back the tears threatening to spill. You turned your head to the side, avoiding his intense gaze that was burning through your soul. Jungkook’s jaw clenched, a mixture of frustration and unease crossing his features.
Turning your head back to face him, he stared at you, searching for answers in your eyes. But all he found was a painful vulnerability that tore at his heart.
“I asked you a question damnit! Who did this to you?” he repeated, feeling his blood boil at the thought of someone hurting you.
In actuality, he knew who was hurting. He just wanted you to say the name knowing you’d do and say anything but his name.
And then, as if the dam within her had crumbled, you broke.
Your loud raw and unrestrained cries erupted into the quiet atmosphere as you crashed into her bare chest. His heart ached witnessing your anguish. He held you close with his strong arms wrapped around your vulnerable form, offering his comfort and support.
“Tell me” he persisted with a gentle tone, but all you did was cry, your shoulders shuddering at each sob. So he waited patiently as he held you close in his arms.
“No matter what I do or how much I try, I can never escape him Jungkook. I’m just done with everything, I’m tired. I don’t want to live like this anymore, it hurts” you cried.
Jungkook’s anger ignited like a storm within him, fueled by a protective instinct that couldn't be contained. His fists clenched involuntarily, his voice now a low, simmering growl.
“That bastard, I swear to god I’m going to fucking kill him when I get a hold of him” he said through gritted teeth.
“I just want to escape” you whimpered, hugging his waist tighter.
“And I’m going to get you out this time, no matter what” he promises, pulling away and staring into your eyes with determination.
“But how? You know how he is. He has power, money and strength that you know you can’t fight against” you questioned weakly.
“Do you trust me?” he asked, “more than anyone” you whispered an answer.
“Then let me handle this” he said, “but I’m scared he’s going to hurt you, and I don’t want anything to happen to you Jungkook” your worried eyes looked into his dark ones.
“Just trust me this once. I’m not letting that motherfucker hurt you ever again, I promise you” he said with seriousness.
You were quiet, feeling hesitant, but you were desperate to escape the toxic bubble you were trapped in. Sniffling, you gave him a nod, “I trust you” you told him.
In the moment of vulnerability, your gazes remained locked, and Jungkook found himself slowly leaning in, aching to kiss you. The air was thick with silent and unsaid emotions, and you felt his breath fan against your lips.
But he held himself back.
The bond you both shared was complicated. It was more than just friendship — you both somehow wanted to venture into the realm of lust and pleasure with no strings attached.
Yet, in this moment of vulnerability, he resisted crossing the boundaries you had both set. He was determined to be there for you in a way that transcended physical desires. A bittersweet smile curving up his lips as his fingers brushed against your cheek.
“You’re cold and wet, you should go shower. I still have your clothes here, I’ll get them for you, hmm?” he suggested.
“Hmm” you responded with a weak smile, and followed him upstairs with your hand intertwined with his.
Reaching his bedroom, he went to his wardrobe while you began to strip from your overgarments, leaving you in your black lace underwear and black cami top. You stood there with your shoulders slumped, tired and defeated.
“Jungkook?” you called out to your best friend, “hmm?” he responded, turning around with your clothes in his hands.
“Do you think I’m worthy enough to be loved and be happy like how they show it in the movies?” you asked, your voice small and cracked as tears accumulated in your eyes.
Jungkook’s heart sank at your question. Placing your clothes on the side of the bed, he approached you and pulled you into a tight comforting hug.
“You’re worthy of everything Y/n, who said you’re not?” he questioned.
“Every time I put my love and trust in someone, they always end up hurting me, like I was some easy game for them. Why? Am I doing something wrong? Don’t I deserve to be happy like everyone else?” you whimpered.
Jungkook couldn’t help but feel his heart sink deeper and deeper at your words, “no Y/n, you’re not doing anything wrong” he said.
“Then why? Why is he hurting me like this? He promised to take care of me, to love me, to always be there for me. Yet, he turned out to be the same monster he promised to protect me from” you silently cried.
“Sometimes monsters hide in sheep's skin. It’s not your fault for not seeing it. He had me fooled too, until when you told me about him slapping you. In fact, he has everyone fooled. And if you hadn’t stopped me that day and the other times he hurt you, I swear to god that bastard would’ve been dead by now” his gritted his teeth.
But then his eyes softened when he turned his attention back on you, “but please, please don’t blame yourself” he said.
“You deserve another chance. You deserve to be happy” he added, pulling away and looking into your eyes.
And there it was again, the urge to kiss you was overwhelming, like an irresistible force pulling him closer to you. As your breaths gradually synchronised, an electric tension hung in the air, a silent acknowledgment of something deeper between you.
Jungkook felt your fingers tremble against his back, and he could sense you yearning, aching for something more than just a friend's touch. Your heart and mind became one, both craving for one thing.
You wanted him. You needed him.
And slowly, you felt yourself leaning in. But for a moment you stopped, and he could feel your hot trembling breaths brush over his lips. He felt your hold around his torso tighten, and before he knew it, he felt your lips smash against his. You pushed him on the bed and hovered over him, kissing him hard.
For a moment he was caught off guard as he instinctively held your waist to support you, but soon succumbed to the overwhelming desire as he fluttered his eyes closed.
He kissed you back with the equal force and desire, his arms wrapping around your petite form as you melted into each other's warmth. The connection deepened as your lips moved in sync with his, a blend of comfort and yearning intertwining. Jungkook’s initial restraint gave way to the intensity of the moment, as he found himself exploring every inch of your lips.
The world outside faded away, leaving only your heartbeats echoing in the stillness. In that moment, the boundaries of your friendship blurred, and your feelings for each other were exposed — yet neither of you wanted to admit it.
Lost in the moment, your hands then slowly began to trail down to his crotch. Jungkook let out a deep groan against your lips, feeling a light squeeze around his clothed cock. “F-Fuck” he shakily swore under his breath as he then felt your hands slip inside his shorts.
However, he snapped back to his consciousness realising what was happening. His eyes shot open, and he grasped your hand to stop you from going any further. Feeling his lips detached from your, you let out a soft whimper.
“Y/n, stop” he cut in, his voice low and hoarse, and took your hand out of his shorts. “This isn’t right, we shouldn’t be doing this right now” he said.
“Why? I need you Jungkook. I want you to fuck me senseless and make me forget everything about today” you whimpered, leaning in closer to kiss him.
But Jungkook held you back shaking his head, and he flipped you over so that he was hovering over you. “You have me Y/n, and I’m not going anywhere. I’ll always be here for you. But you’re not okay right now, and I don’t want to take advantage of your vulnerability” he said.
You sighed in defeat, and slowly broke down into tears all over again. Your cries tore his heart apart, and he wished he could tell you how he truly felt about you.
He longed to wipe away not only your tears but all the sadness in your life — not as a best friend, but as someone who would take any risks to protect the woman he loved. He wanted to hold you closer, to whisper that he loved you more than words could convey, but fear gripped him. The fear of losing the beautiful bond you both shared, the fear of being rejected, and the fear of forever altering your relationship held him back.
As your cries grew loud and hysterical, Jungkook’s heart began to race in panic. His breaths were becoming short and ragged, and his eyes began to pool with tears.
“Hey, look at me” he said, cupping your face in his hands.
“Calm down, I’m here okay?” he tried to comfort you, but you continued to cry, your face turning red as you struggled to breathe in between.
Jungkook felt like his heart was going to rip out of his chest. He felt his throat tighten, trying to control his own tears that threatened to spill.
“Please don’t cry baby, it fucking hurts me” his voice cracked as he brought your face closer to his. Your tearful sobs echoed through the walls of his tiny home, your body trembling with each hiccuping breath.
“P-Please help me, please. Take me somewhere far away, somewhere where I don’t have to see him ever again. I’m scared Jungkook. I’m so fucking scared. Please, make me forget everything about him and all the pain he has inflicted. P-Please” you cried to him.
Jungkook’s eyes widened slightly at your panicked outburst, and gently shook you with your face still cupped in his hands. “B-Baby, baby, hey look at me” he grabbed your face, gently shaking you, and you slowly fluttered your eyes open to finally look at him through your blurry vision.
“Breathe for me baby, it’s okay. Just focus on me. You’re okay, everything’s going to be okay. I’m right here, I’m not going to let anyone hurt you again. I promise you” he said, his heart anxiously hammering inside his chest.
He wiped away your tears with his thumbs, caressing your bruised cheek with tender care, and you onto him as if he were your lifeline. Your breaths came in ragged gasps, and he spoke soothing words, trying to calm the storm inside you.
“Everything’s going to be okay, I promise” he whispered, leaning in to press his forehead against yours.
Slowly, your cries began to subside, replaced by hiccups and sniffles. Jungkook continued to hold you, his heartache mingling with relief that he could offer you some comfort in this moment of vulnerability. His eyes never left yours, and with his hot minty breath fanning over your lips, the storm within you slowly began to fade. You reached your trembling hands to touch his face, your cold fingers slowly tracing along his damp cheeks.
He was crying.
Grabbed the back of his neck, you pulled him in closer and pressed your trembling lips against his plump ones.
The kiss was different from the ones you both shared before. It was slow, tender, and filled with a depth of emotion that words could never convey. It was a kiss that spoke of longing, of hidden feelings finally being acknowledged. Your lips moved together in perfect harmony, a silent confession of their own. And it was as if your souls had finally found each other in that moment, and everything made sense.
As you both pulled away, your foreheads gently touching, you could feel your heart pounding, both breathless. You knew that things had changed between you two. It wasn't just about being friends with benefits anymore; it was about exploring the possibility of something deeper and more meaningful.
“I love you” you muttered against his lips as you wiped away his tears.
It was as if your words held an earth shattering weight to them, Jungkook’s eyes widened, feeling his heart swell as he tried to process your words.
“W-What?” looked at you, “say that a-again?” he stuttered.
“I love you Jungkook, maybe more than a friend, I always have. I wish I had told you earlier” you repeated with a small smile on your face.
Jungkook felt his eyes water, a soft chuckle escaping his mouth, “and what if I tell you I love you too?” he asked.
“I know” you answered, which took him by surprise.
“You knew?” he raised his brow, “the way you act, the things you say, the things you do for me, you’d never do it for anyone else. It was obvious” you said, caressing his cheeks.
Jungkook smiled shyly, snuggling his face in the crook of your neck, “I’d do anything for you” he said.
“You don’t know how happy and relieved I am, I thought you wouldn’t love me back” he then said, his tone changing. Feeling a rug in your heart, you wrapped your arms around his bare torso.
“After everything we’ve been through and everything you have done for me, how can I not?” you responded, placing a soft kiss on his shoulder.
Pulling away, Jungkook stared at you with love shining in his eyes. For a moment there was silence as you both stared into each other’s eyes.
“I love you Y/n. I love you so fucking much. If there’s anything I need in this world, it’s you. I want to be with you, protect you, start a family together and build our own little world. And I promise you I will kill any bastards who hurt you, especially him” he said with determination in his voice.
Your gaze was soft and your smile was gentle as an angel as you continued caressing his cheek. “You love me?” you asked, “so much” he answered.
“How much do you love me?” you then asked, “more than anything in this world — more than my life” he answered without hesitation. You felt your eyes water at his answer, heart growing heavy with emotions.
“Then show me. Show me how much you love me” you said.
And the next thing you knew, he stripped you bare, trapping you under his naked body as he explored every inch of you. It wasn't a moment of lust and desire between you, but rather an act of promising love. And it was at that moment you knew this man was going to cherish you forever, and you trusted him with everything you had.
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▍TWO DAYS LATER
It was nine in the morning, the sun's gentle rays began to seep through the curtains while you and Jungkook lay entwined in a peaceful slumber.
But that tranquility was soon shattered. Suddenly, a series of loud, thunderous bangs echoed through the house, vibrating like a gunshot in the quiet dawn.
Startled, your eyes snapped open, your heart racing in fear. Instinctively, you wrapped your arms around Jungkook’s muscular torso, snuggling yourselves deeper into his embrace.
‘It’s him. It’s him!’ your mind screamed as you began breathing heavily. Soon you felt Jungkook stirring from his slumber as he slowly blinked away his sleep, and quickly registered the panic in your eyes.
“What happened?” he asked, his voice groggy yet concerned as he sat up.
You sat up and held his arm, and you couldn’t even respond as the banging persisted, growing even louder than before. Frowning, Jungkook threw the blanket to the side and rose to his feet.
“Who the hell is banging on the door at this hour?” he muttered under his breath with a hint of annoyance.
However, before he could walk off, you quickly moved to grab his hand to stop him, your wide eyes pleading with him to stay put. You shook your head slightly, a mix of fear and caution written across your features.
Jungkook looked down at you in confusion, “what’s wrong?” he asked. “Don’t open the door, please. What if it’s him?” you whispered urgently, your voice quivering in fear.
Jungkook’s eyes softened, feeling his heart ache seeing how fear was consuming you. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to let him do anything” he reassured, reaching his hand out to caress your cheek.
“But what if he hurts you?” you questioned as you desperately clutched onto his hand.
“His height might be an advantage to him, but he’s nothing compared to me. Trust me babe, I’ll be fine, don’t worry” he said with a warm smile.
But despite his reassurance, your heart still felt uneasy. You trusted him a lot, but that man was unpredictable, and you could never guess what his next move might be.
“You stay here, okay? Don’t come out” he instructed, and you nodded.
“Be careful” you told him, “I will” he said before slipping out of your grip and leaving the room.
The relentless knocking continued as he reached downstairs, now accompanied by muffled shouts and threats. Jungkook’s jaw clenched as he approached the door, his hand hesitating on the door handle. He knew it was him.
He took a deep breath, his senses heightened as he prepared for whatever that might come ahead. He gripped the door handle and uncooked the door. Almost instantly the door swung open, and before he could react, a brutal force struck him square in the chest. The impact sent him flying backward, crashing onto the hardwood floor with a loud thud.
Pain exploded through his body, and the world momentarily blurred as he struggled to catch his breath. And as his vision cleared, he saw a menacing figure towering over him — and he knew very well who it was.
Jungkook struggled to his feet, his chest throbbing from the impact. But he held his ground, his fierce eyes locked onto your boyfriend. Well, ex-boyfriend.
“Where is she?” his deep devilish voice demanded with his jaw clenched.
“That is none of your business anymore Minseok” Jungkook growled.
Hearing that, Minseok’s rage intensified. He lunged forward, grabbing the shorter man by the collar of his shirt and pinning him against the nearest wall.
His grip was tight, and his voice dripped with venom as he repeated his demand, “fucking tell me where she is you bastard!” he screamed.
The tension in the room reached its breaking point, and Jungkook’s patience snapped, pushing him to his limits. Summoning every ounce of strength, he pushed against the other man’s hold, breaking free from his grasp.
Before Minseok could react, Jungkook’s fist connected with his jaw in a swift and powerful punch. Gasping for breath, he stood his ground with his hands curled up into fists in defense.
“Or what?” he challenged as he glared at the man who looked taken back by the hit. But his gaze hardened once again as he regained his composure, and took a few steps towards the shorter male.
“Oh you wouldn’t want to go down there Jeon, you’ll regret it” Minseok warned with a smirk.
Jungkook scoffed, “what are you going to do? Have someone else fight for you as always?” he questioned.
“You’re nothing without your money and power Minseok, and that is what truly makes you a coward” he said, raising his hand and pressing his index finger on the other male’s chest.
Minseok was a man of wealth and status, admired in social circles for his success in the finance world. He owned a renowned finance company, and his reputation as a gentleman followed him wherever he went. Polished, charming, and always impeccably dressed, Minseok had a way of making people feel important in his presence. When you first met him, it seemed like you had found your prince — a man who showered you with love, respect, and attention.
He was everything you could hope for in a partner — or at least that was what he made you believe.
In the beginning, your relationship felt like a dream. Minseok was always thoughtful, planning special dates, surprising you with gifts, and making you feel cherished.
To the outside world, he was the ideal boyfriend, and you were often the envy of your friends. Jungkook too. You couldn't help but be captivated by his charm. He spoke with such kindness, always knowing the right thing to say, especially when it came to your feelings. He made you feel safe, like you could trust him with anything.
Oh how badly you wished you knew everything before.
But as your relationship progressed, subtle cracks began to show — things you had ignored in the haze of infatuation. Minseok had a way of steering conversations back to his needs, his successes, his frustrations, though he cloaked it all in gentleness.
A year into your relationship, he expressed his desire to take things to the next level — intimacy — but you weren’t ready. You loved him, yes, but something inside you hesitated. When you told him you needed more time, he seemed to understand at first. He reassured you, saying all the right things like “I respect your boundaries”.
The second time he brought it up, you felt a little more pressure, but Minseok still kept his composure. However, by the third time, something inside him snapped.
It started with a subtle shift — his eyes narrowing, his voice becoming clipped and tense. You had said, once again, that you weren’t ready, expecting the same understanding response. But instead, Minseok exploded. His face contorted with anger, and he yelled at you, demanding to know why you didn’t trust him. The gentleness that had once defined him vanished, replaced by a cold, aggressive fury.
You were bewildered and terrified. You had never seen him act in such a way, and it left you feeling confused and guilty, as though you somehow caused his outburst.
You convinced yourself it was just a one-time thing — stress from work, maybe. But it wasn’t. The more you pushed back on his demands, the angrier he became. It escalated quickly, and one evening, during another argument, Minseok’s anger turned violent. In a blind fit of rage, he raised his hand and struck you across the cheek.
The moment his hand met your skin, time seemed to stop. You stood frozen in shock, your mind unable to comprehend what had just happened. This was the man who had once showered you with love, the man who made you feel safe. And you always wondered: how could he be the same person who was now causing you pain?
Traumatised and deeply shaken, you didn’t know who to turn to. You kept the incident to yourself, unable to fully process the fact that the man you thought you knew was capable of such violence.
You avoided Jungkook for a week after the incident, afraid that telling him would make everything real. But as the weeks went by, Minseok’s abuse became more frequent, and his once-charming demeanor dissolved completely.
He became a stranger — cruel, controlling, and unpredictable. Each time he hurt you, it was as though the Minseok you had fallen in love with ceased to exist, replaced by someone monstrous.
Or maybe that was who he truly was, and the image everyone had of him was just a facade.
Eventually, the burden became too heavy to bear. You opened up to Jungkook, who had noticed the subtle changes in your behavior long before you even said anything to him. He had seen the fear in your eyes, the way you flinched at sudden movements, and the forced smiles that no longer reached your eyes.
When you finally told him about the abuse, Jungkook was horrified. He had always suspected something was wrong, but hearing the truth from your own mouth shattered the image he had of Minseok.
Jungkook was furious. He wanted to confront Minseok, to make him pay for everything he had put you through. His hands clenched into fists as he ranted about how no man had the right to treat you that way. He was ready to beat him up without hesitation.
But you stopped him.
Though terrified and hurt, you weren't ready for that kind of confrontation. You knew Minseok too well — his temper, his influence, and how easily he could manipulate people. You didn’t want violence to be met with more violence. Confronting him could make things worse, not just for you, but for Jungkook too.
It took everything in you to convince Jungkook to hold back, to stop him from going after Minseok. He protested, his anger still boiling over, but eventually, he agreed. He wouldn’t act on his rage, at least not yet.
Jungkook then tried to convince you to break up with him. But you couldn’t. It wasn’t that easy. Breaking up with him wasn’t as simple as walking away. There would be consequences, and the uncertainty of those consequences kept you paralysed.
You saw the dark side of Minseok, and the thought of leaving him terrified you. You didn’t know what he was capable of if you did try. Every time you imagined the conversation where you told him it was over, your mind filled with dread. What if he hurt you worse?
So, for five more months, you stayed. You endured the abuse, hiding your bruises and your pain, putting on a brave face in public while Minseok continued to control your life.
But now, you were tired. You were tired of constantly running when you knew there was someone who you could lean on — Jungkook. Every time Minseok lashed out, you found yourself retreating into Jungkook’s arms, needing him in ways you had never needed anyone before.
But somewhere along the way, the line between friendship and something more began to blur. What started as simple comfort, a place to escape the pain Minseok inflicted, shifted. The way Jungkook’s arms felt around you lingered in your mind long after you both parted. The warmth of his touch, once so innocent, began to stir something deeper in you. You found yourself longing for those moments, not just for the comfort but for the connection you felt with him.
One night, after yet another moment of abuse, you found yourself at Jungkook’s doorstep, broken and vulnerable. As usual, Jungkook welcomed you in, no questions asked.
But that night felt different. The weight of all the pain, all the confusion, all the emotions you had been bottling up, came crashing down. And in that moment, when Jungkook pulled you into his arms, something altered. The hug lingered a little longer, his hands gentle as they wiped away your tears. Without thinking, you leaned in, and Jungkook didn’t pull away.
The kiss was soft at first, tentative, as if both of you were unsure of what was happening. But the unspoken feelings you both had been hiding for so long surged to the surface, and what started as a hesitant kiss quickly became something more. That night, you sought more than just emotional comfort from Jungkook — you sought intimacy, a connection that went beyond the friendship you had built over the years.
In the days that followed, you found yourself confused. You still hadn’t left Minseok, too afraid of the consequences, but your heart was no longer in it. How could it be, when Jungkook was the one who had been there for you all along? Every time you thought of Jungkook, your heart ached, not with pain but with longing.
It took you long enough to realise that you had fallen in love with your best friend, and there was no doubt that Jungkook loved you too. It was obvious he did.
Back to reality, Jungkook knew he had pulled the trigger with his words with the way fire in the man’s eyes erupted, but he didn’t care — he would do anything to fight for you.
The next thing they knew was the hallway erupting into a violent chaos. The sounds of grunts, fists meeting flesh, and the crashing of furniture filled the air, as two men fought for their own reasons.
“I’m not letting you hurt her again” Jungkook growled, throwing another punch at Minseok’s cheek.
As the man doubled down in pain, Jungkook took the opportunity to kick him with a powerful force, sending him to the ground. Ignoring his bloody fists, he quickly got on top of him and began throwing punches left and right, his anger blinding him completely.
“If Y/n hadn’t stopped me, I would have killed you a long time ago. But anymore. I’m going to kill you today” Jungkook seethed, his voice filled with a burning rage that matched the fire in his eyes.
You, on the other hand, heard the commotion from downstairs, and your heart was rapidly pounding against your ribcage.
You jumped off the bed and rushed to the door, but you stopped yourself just as you were about to twist the door handle. You hesitated for a moment as your mind raced with all sorts of thoughts, but felt your concern for Jungkook’s safety overcome your anxiety, and soon you rushed out of the room.
Halfway down the staircase, you came to an abrupt stop. You clung to the railing, your eyes widened in terror seeing your worst fears right in front of you. Adrenaline surged through your veins, and despite you trembling, you knew you couldn't stay hidden any longer.
Your body began shake witnessing the chaos, especially the blood that was on the floor. With tears in your eyes, you continued your way down and ran towards Jungkook, screaming for him to stop.
“Jungkook stop!” you cried, grabbing his shirt and trying to pull him away.
The room was a warzone, and you felt trapped in the crossfire of emotions and violence. Your hands trembled as you tried to pull Jungkook away from Minseok, but the fury in his eyes kept him fixated on the man below.
“Baby please, stop it!” you sobbed in terror, feeling your grip weaken. Your voice soon caught Minseok’s attention, and his hard glare pierced through your soul. Soon, he found himself using all his strength to kick off the man above him, sending him crashing into a nearby table.
Jungkook grunted in pain, his breath knocked out of him. You gasped in horror, frozen with fear as Minseok staggered to his feet. His eyes darted between the two of you, and a twisted grin formed on his bloody lips, “at last I found you” he said.
“S-Stay away from me” you warned him, your heart pounding in fear as he walked towards you.
“But I came to take you home baby. And I promise to be nicer” his said, his voice innocent as a child.
You shook your head vigorously, “n-no, I’m not coming anywhere with you. Take the hint Minseok, we’re over. We’ve been over since the day you raised your hand on me. You’re a monster, and I’ll never love a monster like you. All you did was hurt me, and force me to do things I never wanted to do. I’ll never forgive you for the shit you’ve done to me” you cried as you stepped backwards.
The twisted grin on his lips widened, and his eyes grew fiercer with anger. “I’m taking you with me whether you like it or not” he said with his deep and harsh, ignoring whatever you had just said.
You felt helpless, trapped, and tears streamed down your face as you took slow trembling steps backwards. “You thought you could leave me so easily?” he hissed, his eyes burning with fire.
“You thought you could be happy without me?” he questioned.
You felt the air knock out of your lungs when your steps came to a sudden halt, feeling your back hit against the wall. Panic began to well up and your breaths became shallow gasps. Minseok’s smirk grew seeing you helpless, and he took the opportunity to close the distance between you both.
“You can’t escape me babygirl, you’re mine. Not his, not anyone’s, but mine” he growled, slamming his hand on the wall above your head as he leaned down to you.
You flinched, and your voice trembled as you tried to respond, but your fear had paralysed you. Your mind raced, searching for a way out, but his threatening presence left you feeling powerless.
In that moment, you realised the true extent of the darkness you had escaped when you left him behind. You had found happiness and love with Jungkook, and you felt safe with him. But now, face to face with your past, you were forced to confront the demons you thought you had left behind.
“And if I can’t have you, no one can, because you’re always going to be mine. GOT IT?!” he screamed, grabbing a fistful of your hair.
You let out a loud shriek followed by a terrified and agonising cry, and all you could pray at this moment was for everything to end. It felt like a nightmare from which you couldn't wake.
Just when it seemed like all hope was lost, a sudden crash shattered the tense atmosphere.
Jungkook, driven by a mix of fear and anger, staggered to his feet despite the excruciating pain in his abdomen and grabbed a vase from the nearby table. With a fierce swing, he struck Minseok over the head, and the impact sent him crumpling to the floor, unconscious. The room fell into a long heavy silence, soon broken by your laboured breathing and the faint sobs that escaped your trembling lips.
Jungkook rushed to your side, wrapping his arms around you, offering the safety and protection you had so desperately needed. “Are you okay? Did he hurt you anywhere?” he questioned, panicked, as he pulled away.
He cupped your face, scanning your face and body for injuries. Seeing nothing, he sighed in relief. “I-I’m okay” you reassure him with a nod, struggling to keep your composure.
But Jungkook could see right through you. You were shaken. The fear of forever being trapped in the hands of a monster, the fear of being hurt, and chaos that unfolded in front of you — you were traumatised.
Without saying a word, he pulled you into a tight embrace. And in that moment, you felt yourself crumble, and all the pent up emotions came flooding down. “Let it all out, it’s okay” he whispered into your ear.
Overwhelmed, you broke down into tears, crying out loud and hysterically as you clung onto him. You cried out all the fear, anger, and pain that had been bottled up inside you for so long.
“I-I was so s-scared Jungkook” you cried.
“You’re okay now. He’s not going to hurt you after this, I promise” he reassured, placing a kiss on your forehead as he tightened his hug. You stay like that for a while until your cries died down, and when they did, you pulled away and turned your gaze to the unconscious man lying on the floor.
“What are we going to do now?” you asked.
“I’ll drop you off at my parents’ house, just stay with them for a while. I’ll handle everything here, don’t worry” he answered. You turned to face him, and it was only then when you noticed his face. Your eyes widened and a gasp left your mouth as you scanned his face.
“J-Jungkook, you’re hurt” you said, cupping his face in your hands — he was bleeding everywhere. The gnash on his forehead, the cut on his cheek and his bleeding lip, it all made your stomach churn.
“I’m fine, don’t worry” he smiled weakly.
“Now go and get ready, I’ll drop you off. I’ll come over later and we’ll stay over for a few days until everything is sorted out, hmm?” he explained, and gave him a nod in agreement.
“But let me treat your wounds first at least” you then said, “okay” Jungkook sighed.
And with that, you held his hand and dragged him upstairs. Jungkook was never a violent person, but in this moment, he knew he had done what he had to do to protect you, even if it meant resorting to violence.
━━━━━━━━━━
▍THREE DAYS LATER
As the rain poured outside, Jungkook sat by the window with his phone pressed to his ear. He gazed at the grey sky watching the droplets that trickled down the glass pane.
“That bastard is done for anyway, but I’ll be over there in an hour or two” he said, and after exchanging a few more words, he ended the call.
Just as he ended the call, his mother entered the room holding a steaming cup of coffee. “Here you go dear” she said as she handed the cup to her son. Jungkook gave her a small smile as he took it from her, mumbling a tiny ‘thank you’.
“How’s Y/n doing? She was complaining of a headache last night” Jungkook asked, “she’s resting in the room. She’s okay now, I made her soup earlier” she replied as she sat down next to him.
It had been three days since Minseok’s intrusion, and you were still shaken by everything. Jungkook knew he had reached his breaking point that day, and he promised himself that he wouldn’t hold back anymore if he came face to face with him.
“Is everything okay honey? You look stressed. Also, what’s happening with that man?” she asked, gently rubbing his back.
“He’s still in custody. He wants to file an appeal despite all the evidence against him. If the court grants that appeal, I know for sure he’s going to use his dirty tricks to get himself out. But I’m not going to let that happen” Jungkook answered with a sigh, and bright the cup to his lips to take a sip.
Jungkook called his family lawyer the moment you and him reached his parents’ house. The man had been a steady presence in their lives for years, handling everything from minor disputes to family issues. Now, Jungkook needed his guidance for something much darker. The attack wasn’t just on him; it was part of a larger pattern of abuse Minseok had been subjecting you to for months. So with the lawyer’s advice, Jungkook made sure that everything was done right.
“What’s the public’s opinion on this? I heard him and his company had a good reputation” his mother then questioned.
Not long after consulting with his family lawyer and further investigation, somehow Minseok’s actions had reached the media. Information not just about the abuse and the recent attack, but the shady business dealings and the fraud had been leaked by internal sources. Reporters had jumped on the story, exposing him for what he truly was — a manipulator, an abuser, a criminal hiding behind a veneer of respectability.
Jungkook had watched it unfold with a mix of relief and disbelief. The world was finally seeing the truth about Minseok, and you didn’t have to hide anymore.
“Well, the good thing is that they’re not on his side. They saw and heard everything, so even if he was to get himself out, he still wouldn’t be able to live the way he did before — they’ll tear him apart” Jungkook explained as he placed the cup on the table.
“Everything is going to be alright, it’s just a matter of time” she reassured him.
“I hope so. I don’t want that bastard near her ever again, or else-” he gritted his teeth.
“Jungkook,” his mother cut him off before he could finish, Jungkook hummed and turned to face her.
“The enemy you’re fighting is not fighting you because you’re weak. He’s fighting you because you’re strong. He’s fighting you because he knows what the truth is and so do you. If anything, he’s scared. He’s scared that you’re not a coward like him who hides behind money and power. Standing your ground and fighting for truth is the biggest weapon anyone could use, no matter what happens. Remember that” she said, looking into his eyes.
Jungkook wished he could snap his fingers and make everything right. But he knew it wouldn’t be that simple. You both would have to face whatever came next — together, whatever that meant. Whether you were his girlfriend or just his best friend didn’t seem so important right now. What mattered was that you were here, safe, and that he would do whatever it took to make sure you stayed that way.
━━━━━━━━━━
▍TWO DAYS LATER
The tension in the courtroom was suffocating, and you couldn’t hide your anxiety and anticipation as your eyes fixated on the judge. Your hands were tightly intertwined with Jungkook’s, who had been your rock through this whole journey.
“Everything’s going to be okay” he said.
You glanced at Jungkook who seemed a little nervous but somehow relaxed at the same time, as if he already knew what the outcome was going to be.
Across the courtroom, Minseok stood as a shell of his former self, looking dishevelled and defeated as the judge read out his sentence. The courtroom felt cold, and the air was thick. You had your eyes fixed on the floor, barely breathing as the words rang out.
“Yoo Minseok, you are sentenced to ten years in prison for abuse, assault, and fraud. As Miss Kim Y/n requested, a restraining order is placed upon your release. And any violations to the order will serve you a further three years in prison” the judge declared, his voice firm and final.
Jungkook exhaled a breath he didn’t realise he had been holding. It was over. The months of manipulation, the fear you had lived in, the attack — it was all over.
You couldn't hold back your tears, not of sorrow, but of relief and joy. The weight that had burdened you for so long had finally lifted. The courtroom seemed to blur as your emotions overwhelmed you. You cried not only for yourself but for the countless others who had suffered silently under his control.
However, amidst the tears and celebration, a sudden angry scream pierced the air. It was Minseok, his face twisted with rage, as the guards began to escort him away. The sound of his furious voice startled you, and you quickly gripped onto Jungkook’s shirt.
“It’s over now baby, he’s not going to hurt you anymore” Jungkook said, placing a kiss on top of your head as he hugged you tighter. You hummed, but kept your eyes at the raging man.
His outburst was ineffective, a last desperate attempt to reclaim control over a life he had tried to shatter. But justice had conquered, and you could finally breathe freely, knowing that you were safe from his abuse.
Jungkook held you close in his arms as your body shook with sobs, crying every drop of emotions you had pent up inside you. “I love you, thank you for staying by my side” you choked in between your cries.
Jungkook kisses the top of your head, holding you even closer. “I love you too, and I’ll always be by your side. And I'm so proud of you for staying strong, and for trusting me” he said.
You looked up and smiled at him, slowly leaning in and pressing your lips on his. As years of heartbreak and suffering came to an end, you finally found your happily ever after with a man you trusted with everything — because you knew he would never hurt you like Minseok did.
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𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗥𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧𝗦 𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗘𝗥𝗩𝗘𝗗
@𝗷𝗸𝘀𝗮𝗿𝗰𝗵𝗶𝘃𝗲𝘀 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟰
©️
201 notes · View notes
daydreamerwoah · 18 hours
Text
Love Through It All Pt. 13
tw: mentions of cheating, mentions of divorce; hurt; angst; anger; rollercoaster of emotion; sadness; arguing; crying; mentions of therapy/counseling; brief mention of sexual content; kidnapping; violence; guns
Please read Part 1 for my author notes for the beginning of this story if this is your first time here.
"Now.... was that so hard?" Jax teased as he tossed your phone on the ground. The crackling noise indicating that your screen probably shattered when it hit the hard floor. He chuckled as he walked around you, patting your shoulder like he was your friend. You tried to shrug him off, but he only squeezed your shoulder hard, making you wince.
You glanced at Andrei, seeing the same bored expression on his face. The only movement he made was when he shifted his weight as he gazed back at you with narrow eyes.
"What-what are you gonna do to him?" you asked. Terrified of what the response would be but desperately needing to know.
Jax hummed, "You'll just have to wait and see now, won't you?" He said as he leaned forward that his face was right in front of you. "I'm sure... you'll want to talk-"
"You need to make this quick," Andrei interrupted Jax's toying with you.
"Patience, my friend," he faced him, "You'll get what you came for," he said before facing you again, "Now.... let's make sure your caring husband gets to really see you."
"He won't believe you," you tried to convey with anger in your voice. But that only made him laugh again.
"I think the text I just him will."
************************************************************************
When Simon got out of the car, he looked around, noticing how deserted the neighborhood seemed. The drive to the place you texted was far out of the city. He immediately knew that this would only go two ways. He either would make sure you got out of there alive or you both would die. He didn't even want to think about the second option. There was no way he was going to allow you to die... not while he still could make sure you would be happy one day.
"Hands where I can see them," a voice said. Simon turned to his right, seeing two men dressed in all black come out of the dark shadows with guns drawn at him. He didn't recognize them and briefly wondered how the hell they got a hold of you. But if he did anything now, who knows if he would find you in time, so he raised his hands in the air before one of them slowly approached him.
With the other keeping his weapon pointed at Simon, the second man patted his clothes, finding and pulling out the two guns and a knife he had on him. When nothing else was found, the man shoved him in the direction of a damn near abandoned building across the street, "Move."
As they stepped through the doors, Simon saw exactly why it looked abandoned on the outside. The hot stench of sweat, sex, and drugs circulated the air around random bodies - including his.
It was a prostitution ring.
"Keep moving," the man said as he shoved Simon through the crowd of women and men toward a door in the back of the building. A guard who stood in front of it opened the door and let them through, leading down a flight of stairs to what looked like a basement. The cold air would have made him shiver if he wasn't fuming inside.
They strolled up to a large door, and one of the men banged on it twice before yelling something in an accent Simon immediately recognized.
Russian.
You had been captured by Russians?
A few seconds later, the door swung open, and he was shoved harshly into the dim room before he was hit on the back of his left knee, forcing him to kneel.
You screamed... Well tried to. Simon glanced up to meet your wide eyes as you tried wiggling out of the chair that you were still tied to. Duct tape had been taped over your mouth.
"Well.. well.. well.... look who we have here," Jax said from the side of the room as the two men also walked inside and closed the door. He drew his weapon and pointed it at Simon'.
The moment his eyes met Jax, he felt rage rush through his entire body. You even saw the expression on his face. He was out for blood. But this only made the man smirk.
"Fuckin' bastard," Simon whispered, only for Jax to hit him across the face with his gun.
You yelled out again, only for the sound to be muffled by the tape over your mouth.
"Can't tell you how long I've waited to do that," Jax said like it was a weight lifted off his shoulders just because he smacked your husband.
Tears started to run down your face, and you continued to try and make any noise. Simon quickly glanced at you, his eyes softening briefly, before looking around and seeing another man standing in the room - Andrei.
"Restrain him," Jax ordered, making the previous guards pull Simon to his feet before forcing him into a chair that was a couple of feet in front of you and tying him up. They even yanked his balaclava off of his face, "There.... just like your counseling sessions, yeah? The two of you sitting next to each other... talking about how he cheated on you," he chuckled.
Simon shot him a death glare, remaining silent as the man stood between the two of you. This was nothing new... Simon had gone through hell and back when he was captured by Roba years ago. He had been shot at plenty of times and taken many hits, bruises, and wounds since he joined the military. He wasn't about to give the fucking guy the satisfaction of saying anything.
You wanted to tell him to shut the fuck up. Regardless of what happened between you and Simon, it was none of his fucking business. But you also was so confused on how he knew so much about what you and your husband was going through..... it went beyond just the damn videos.
"But let's talk about how you cheated on him, shall we?" Jax continued as he looked at you with an evil smirk on his face.
Your eyes widened at him so big that he chuckled before glancing at Andrei. You weren't the only one shocked, though. Simon's body tensed at what Jax had said, eyebrows drawing together when he saw your reaction.
The TV that was next to the desk suddenly turned on, making everyone in the room glance in its direction as a video popped up on the screen. Your heart dropped to your stomach as you looked at yourself, straddling Andrei. Your muffled yells made Jax laugh, but you wanted to kill him.
Simon's eyes stayed glued to the screen as he watched you go from straddling Andrei to laying your back as he attached his mouth to you. The moans that escaped your lips made his heart stop; his mind going blank for a moment. To know that the same man who pulled those moans out of you was standing in the same room as him wasn't what pissed him off anymore.... it was the fact that he'd done it because this was all a game to them. Jax, Andrei, all of them. He honestly would have felt better if you had cheated on him with that guy from the club, even if it hurt him. At least you wouldn't have been fucking here, kidnapped.
The moment the video stopped, you locked eyes with Simon. Your puffy eyes made him internally broken, but his facial expression hadn't changed, and you didn't know if he was upset that you had gotten revenge for cheating on you... or if it was something else. You wanted to say that it meant nothing. That you were drunk and fucking mad at him... but you couldn't say shit with the tape still over your mouth.
"I have to say, she sounds.. so damn good. Doesn't she?" Jax teased as he asked everyone in the room. Even with Andrei not responding, since he was the one who had his tongue on you, Jax smiled at Simon like he had won or something, "How does it feel?" He walked and stood behind Simon as he leaned down so his face was almost next to his, looking at you, "Tell her." He demanded.
Simon's eyes never strayed away from yours as you continued to cry. The look on his face hadn't really changed, but his eyes told you exactly how he felt. The regret that ran through his soul.... he wished he could been a better man; a better husband. You didn't deserve any of this.. yet you stayed. You had wanted to work on your marriage even after the ugly truth came out. It was his fault, and he would forever kill himself over it. He would be grateful if you ever forgave him, promising to give you the entire world and more after he so much tore yours apart by cheating.
"I love you," he lowly said, making you cry even more. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart... for everythin'."
"Satisfying, isn't it?.. Finally realizing your mistakes?"
Simon finally tore his eyes away from you and looked at Jax, "Let her go."
He paused, acting as if he was thinking about something, "I thought about it," he teased, "but see... I can't do that. She's knows far too much... much more than our girl Williams," he joked - a terrible one that made both you and Simon shoot him the deadliest glare.
He raised his gun up, pointing it at you, making your eyes widen.
"Let her go, Jax," Simon raised his voice, "This is between me and you."
"Oh, it's not just me," he chuckled, "But I guess it would be easier to take you out first." He moved his gun to point it at Simon's temple.
You yelled through the tape and thrashed around as you tried to get out of the restraints. Your skin was probably raw at how much you rubbed at the ropes. You wanted to beg him not to shoot your husband.. you even tried to. But it was pointless.
"Say goodbye to your wife... Lieutenant."
Time felt like it slowed down as you and Simon looked at each other. He looked angry and sad, but no doubt love. He loved you for everything you had given him, everything you had done for him. And if this was the last time he'd see you... then so be it. He was ready... and you didn't want that. You weren't ready to leave him; to say goodbye.
The wails that came from your muffled lips had you choking on the saliva that bubbled up in your throat. You wanted to vomit so bad.
"Close your eyes love," Simon told you. You didn't want to. God you didn't want to. But you couldn't stomach the thought of seeing him die right in front of you, so you shut your eyes tight and waited for the loud popping sound of Jax's gun to go off.
I love you Simon, you muffled loud enough that you hoped he would understand you.
I was on the edge of my seat just writing this omg lol!
Like, comment, send feedback :)
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narryffdreaming · 1 day
Text
lia and harry's story (one)
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summary: harry is a bartender and lia lives right across the street. rating: +18 || warnings: mental health (anxiety) and smut (here and there) || word count: 14,7k
some scenes are different. some scenes are still the same. but here they are again.
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“Rohan isn’t working tonight.”
The toneless, husky voice echoed in the dim lights, and Lia’s heart skipped a beat as she whipped her head to her left.
Harry walked past her and towards the sink, too occupied carrying a box under one of his arms. When he stopped, he turned his back to where she was and placed the item on the laminated counter, then put his free hand into his pocket and pulled a utility knife, not wasting any other second before using it to tore the cardboard in half. 
Lia’s belly fluttered. 
White t-shirt, black pants. Sleeves short enough for her to admire the multiple tattoos covering his arms, and fabric tight enough for her to follow the movements of the muscles on his back as he pulled a few napkins and straws out of the box. 
She only needed a second for things to click inside her, and for her to remember why she decided to go to The Wandering Triplet in the first place. 
Harry’s unkempt dark brown hair curled on top of his head and also a little bit to the sides, but it seemed shorter on the back. He had clearly gotten a haircut since last week, when she last saw him at the bar, and even though Lia couldn’t see his face, she already knew that it suited him. 
She knew that he looked good. 
Really good.
No, she knew that he looked great. 
Unfairly and painfully handsome. 
Like a dream. 
Like he always did. 
Lia sighed. 
Harry grabbed the box with one hand and turned around, briefly glancing at her. He didn’t say nor did a thing, seemingly completely unamused by her presence as he looked forward and headed back towards the black curtain. 
And that’s exactly when it hit her: she still hadn’t said anything to him.
Nothing.
Not even a word.
Oh my God.
A flush of heat creeped up through the back of Lia’s neck, and her belly turned into knots. 
She shifted on her feet, straightening up and pulling her elbows closer to her body as she watched him disappear behind the thick black fabric.
Rohan isn’t working tonight. 
Rohan isn’t working tonight. 
Rohan isn’t working tonight.
Lia frowned. 
Why did he even… Ugh. 
Of course Rohan wasn’t working that night. It wasn’t something hard to figure out—she had been to The Wandering Triplet more than enough times to realize that on Wednesday Rohan always started his shift later at night, meaning that Harry always opened the bar by himself. 
Besides, why did he have to start a conversation with her like that? Why couldn’t he just have said something simple like… Hello? 
She pulled the loose sleeves of her cardigan and covered her fingers, then crossed her arms against her stomach and scanned the three shelves at the back wall. Honestly, entertaining any useless thoughts was better than overthinking Harry’s actions. She didn’t have the strength inside her to try and understand his dislike for her. Not anymore. She had already given up on that a long time ago. All she wanted was to get something to drink, get comfortable on a table, and daydream a little before going back home and dealing with all the very real consequences of that pathetic and useless day. 
Lia shook her head. 
Ugh.
White rum… White rum… Where’s the white rum? 
Since she’d walked into The Wandering Triplet for the first time, Lia had stared at those shelves long enough to realize they had a system to place everything. The one at the bottom was filled with different types of glasses, all upside-down, while the other two above were used to perfectly organize rows of many different types of alcohol.
When it came to the bottles, the still unopened ones and also the most expensive brands were at the top, while the most commonly used were in the middle, closer to their reach. From left to right, they were also careful, matching not only by type, but also organizing by brands and colors.
Another sigh left her mouth, and Lia dropped her shoulders. She knew she’d agreed with her psychiatrist that she’d wait until her body got used to the new medication, but she could’ve really used a drink that day. Not just any drink, but a mojito—it was her favorite, and Harry always made the best one.
“Ok, then. What can I get you?”
Lia jumped slightly, batting her eyelashes and shifting her arms on the counter.
Harry stood next to her, cleaning the already-clean-bar. 
She recognized his white t-shirt as one of her favorites. The design, mixing palm trees and searchlights with shades of blue and green, reminded her of one summer she’d spent in Los Angeles with her family, and the faded orange words around it made her think of an old record store. 
Harry always looked cool with that t-shirt, especially when he matched it with those black wide-legged pants he was wearing right then. He looked like someone who could be in a band, like someone who could hold a guitar in front of a crowd and make people faint at the sight.
Not a popstar or rockstar, though. Nuh-uh. He was too snappy for that. 
If Harry were a musician, he would probably be part of an indie band. Or one of those groups people never heard of until they randomly shuffled through a rainy and foggy playlist on Spotify. 
And he’d definitely be the moody and mysterious bass player, bothered only by doing his own sound and ignoring all the screaming girls at his feet. 
Bass guitar player. Yes. That would be for sure—he had great hands, and they looked perfect for the four-stringed instrument.
Harry wiped the surface forcefully, then tightened his long fingers around the light-brown towel and threw the item over his shoulder. As he held it there with one hand, he finally faced her, grasping the edge of the counter with his other hand and stretching his arm. 
Leaf, intense, green eyes stared into her boring brown ones, and Lia’s heart skipped a beat. 
He was so pretty. 
So, so pretty. 
And to daydream and imagine things was fun, but Harry wasn’t in any indie band, nor even a musician. He was simply the sulky, pretentious bartender who worked across the street from her apartment. And the guy who she had the biggest and most stupid crush on.
Harry cleared his throat, raised his eyebrows, and flinched his chin down.
Damn.
Lia shifted on her feet. 
“It’s—I—I mean…” She shook her head and cleared her throat, too. “Sorry. Just water, I think? I—Yes. Water. Please.”
Harry rolled his eyes and turned around, scoffing quietly as he walked to the shelves. “Of course.”
Lia furrowed her brows and held her breath, watching him take his time while he put some distance between them. As if having to get her a simple glass of water was the most boring thing he could do. Or maybe the most annoying thing he could do. Or maybe the most tiring thing he could do. 
His reaction felt out of place, but she couldn’t be surprised, could she? After all, she was used to his awful mood, and she’d gotten really good at pretending it didn’t bother her—to the point where she almost believed it herself. 
In fact, to be honest, had it been any other day, she probably wouldn’t have even minded his behavior. She would’ve probably just accepted it and added it to the countless humiliating moments she’d lived so far. 
But it was the last thing she needed on that particular Wednesday evening, when everything had already turned out so shitty that she was both mentally and emotionally exhausted.
Lia exhaled through her nose and clenched her jaw. 
In less than eight hours, three people had already treated her with disdain and condescension, and four had made her feel inferior and weak. All she had done was to work on herself and try to step out of her comfort zone, like she promised Dr. Reisman she would do, and all she had gotten in return was… Nothing. 
So shame on her for needing some distraction, right? Shame on her for thinking that silently watching her crush from far away would help her forget about her stressful and dreadful day. Shame on her for believing that she would be able to feel at least slightly better after spending five minutes at the bar. 
A glass full of water emerged in front of her, and Lia blinked.
“There you go, princess.” Harry smiled, as blatantly sarcastic and careless as he could be, then turned around and walked back to the sink. 
Lia glared at him, tightening her hands into fists and letting her body be consumed by her heavy breathing. 
She hated when he looked at her like that. And she hated when he made her feel like a child. Harry almost never talked to her, but when he did, he seemed to always find a way to make her feel mocked or challenged to say something. Challenged to be different. Challenged to speak up. Challenged to react quicker. 
And Lia hated it. 
She truly hated it, because she wasn’t good with words. At all. And she was well aware of that. She was getting treatment because of that, for fucks sake! 
So she didn’t need anyone pointing out the obvious for her. And she didn’t need anyone making her feel even worse for not being able to actually get better. Or for constantly messing things up even though she desperately tried not to. 
Why… 
Why did it have to be so hard for her? 
And why did it have to be so hard all the damn time?
Why couldn’t she get things right? At least once in her life? 
And why on earth did she insist on nurturing that fruitless crush, anyway? 
Huh?
Why did she care about someone who didn’t know her at all? Someone who had never even tried to get to know her? 
Huh?
And also, why couldn’t Harry just let her be?
Why did he have to treat her that way?
What had she even done to him, huh? 
What had she done, besides moving across the street and being a regular customer at the bar? 
Huh? 
Huh?!!
Lia grabbed the glass in front of her and took a sip of water. Then another one, and another one. Desperately gulping down three quarters of it before putting it down on the counter again.
Harry was unbelievable.
Unbelievable!
The judgment behind every action and every word was completely unnecessary. 
So what if she was drinking water? Huh? Why did it matter? What difference did it make? She could drink whatever she wanted to, right? 
And why—why—calling her princess? What was the point? What did he even mean by that? 
Huh?
Huh?!?!
“Ok, look,” Harry said, standing in front of her with a frown on his face and arms crossed on his chest, “are you just going to stand there all night? Because I told you Rohan isn’t—”
“Oh my goodness!” Lia laughed, uncrossing her arms and taking a step back from the counter. “This is… I… You… I’m just… Ugh!”
She shook her head and looked down. Reaching for her bag, she watched her own movements as she put her hand inside it and rummaged through her things.
“I’ll go, okay? I’ll go,” she said, fishing around for her wallet. “But you know what, Harry? Considering I’ve been around here for almost a year now, and that so far you’ve never even cared to… I don’t know… At least know my name, you don’t need to try so hard to be an asshole to me all the time, y’know?” She found some cash laying around, then grabbed the notes firmly between her fingers and slammed them on the counter. “You’ve already earned the title.”
She turned around and gritted her teeth, feeling the heat reverberating through her skin as she mumbled, “Asshole.”
And then, she walked away, finally removing herself from the unneeded interaction and not even once daring to look back at his face. 
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For the next three weeks, Lia didn’t go to the bar. 
It wasn’t planned, it wasn’t intentional. She was busy, and life was happening. She went back to her parents house for a weekend, enjoyed the quietness of hometown, worked some extra hours, had dinner with her friends, took some alone time for herself, and then… Well, and then she also didn’t make any effort to go.
Because why would she, anyway?
“Excuse me.”
Someone shoved her, causing Lia to stumble on her feet and snap out of her mind. She looked to her side, apologizing for standing in the way while shuffling on her feet to keep her balance. 
Nobody seemed to care about her presence, though. Nor to have the slight idea of how much wondering it took before showing up again. Or to know that the last time she’d been there she’d called a bartender out for not knowing her name—and that she might’ve used the word asshole, too. 
Lia let her hair fall on her face and sighed. 
Things inside The Wandering Triplet were… Different.
Really different. 
For starters, it was way more packed than usual, more crowded than what she ever expected it to be. People stood everywhere, talking and laughing even louder than any other time. And she wasn’t sure the place had at least once smelled that much like beer and perfume. 
On top of that, two guys seemed to be playing live music, something she had definitely never seen there before. Just like a lot of the faces surrounding her right then and there.
She swallowed, then rubbed her neck. 
It was hard not to notice the way her body heat had risen. Or how her entire outfit suddenly seemed like a bad call—because, honestly, how was she supposed to not sweat under that black turtleneck? Or under the tight fabric of her jeans? Even her feet were burning up, buried in those damn leather boots.
And it wasn’t like Lia was incapable of dressing according to the situation. It was just that, well, how was she even supposed to imagine that the place would ever be so crowded?
Especially on a Monday night! 
C’mon!
Monday nights were always their quietest nights. So much so that they didn’t even require two bartenders working at the same time. 
And Lia knew that. It was exactly the whole reason why she had chosen to go back on that particular night: because Monday nights were Harry’s nights off. 
Or, well, at least they used to be Harry’s nights off.
Shit.
There was absolutely no way Rohan would be able to handle that chaos all by himself, right? 
So… 
Oh God. 
She was going to see him… Wasn’t she?
The whole therapy session, with all the planning and thinking about how she could go back there without actually having to face him, had been a complete waste of time. Right?
It had been for nothing. 
And a complete failure. 
Right? 
Right?!
Her stomach fluttered, then shot a soft tingling to her chest.
Shit.
She didn’t want to see him, though. Of course she didn’t. Not after she’d humiliated herself. 
So… She should’ve turned around and gone back home, right? Try it again on a different night, maybe. Or just find a different bar. 
Right?
Lia sighed, heavier this time. 
She couldn’t run away, though. The whole point of going to the bar again was to challenge her own thoughts and beliefs, so she couldn’t give up now. She had to try. 
Right?
Oh God.
Sliding her tongue through her lips, Lia put her hair behind her ears and focused on her destination, then squeezed her way in to make it to the counter and order herself a drink—just as she promised Dr. Reisman she would do. 
To navigate her body through so many strangers wasn’t an easy task, that’s for sure, but she eventually managed to push herself all the way across the room. Once she found herself closer to the counter, a man walked backwards, holding three beers between his hands. 
Lia turned sideways, giving him more room to walk without dropping anything. It also turned out to be the perfect opportunity for her to place one hand on the edge of the wooden bar, hold herself, and step onto the new empty space.
After that, everything felt mostly like a blur. 
Rohan was there, but he wasn’t alone. There was also a girl helping him out. A girl she hadn’t seen there before. Short, blonde hair. Long legs and arms. Tattoos on her shoulder and piercing on her nose. She handed him empty glasses and chatted excitedly, while he grabbed each with a smile and put them all back on the bottom shelf.
And then a tattooed arm abruptly flashed in front of her, and Lia lurched back. Barely catching the color of the towel being yanked in circles right next to her.
Someone yelled an order, another person called someone’s name, and another one shouted an ‘excuse me’ a couple of steps to her side. Pop acoustic covers were still playing in the back and someone dropped a couple of spoons behind the bar. 
Everything was happening at the same time. Right where she was. And yet all she could pay attention to was Harry’s figure coming to a stop in front of her.
Harry blinked once, then turned his head slightly to the side, shouting the words without removing his sea-green eyes from her. “Rohan! Lia is here!”
And just like that, Harry turned around and walked away.
And she was all by herself all over again.
Lia frowned. 
What…
Did he… 
Had Harry just called her name?
Lia is here. 
Lia is here.
That’s what he’d said, right?
Lia is here.
Her stomach fluttered.
Considering how the last thing she had said to him—besides calling him an asshole, of course—was that he didn’t know her name, that couldn’t be a coincidence… Right?
Right?!
“Lia, heyyy!" 
She lowered her gaze to the counter and furrowed her brows.
How the hell had Harry been able to do that? To disconcert her in a matter of two seconds?
Four words. That was it. That was all it had taken.
All because he had said her name.
After three weeks of not seeing him.
“Hey, are you okay?” 
Rohan stood in front of her with worried eyes and puzzled face, and Lia blinked. 
It took her a moment to realize she was still frozen in place, but she finally shook her head and looked up.
“Uh, yeah… I… Yes. Oh my God. Sorry. Yes.” She chuckled and waved her hand. “I just... Long day today. Sorry.”
Rohan nodded and smiled, too. “Gotcha. No worries! It’s nice to see you again! You look taller today.”
“Oh.” Lia leaned back and looked down at her feet, wiggling her toes inside her high heel leather boots. “Must be the shoes.” She shrugged. “Don’t wear them often.”
“You should. You look nice! So, what can I get ya? Let’s cheer you up after a long day, huh?”
Lia sighed, then cleared her throat.
Rohan’s energy was always loud. His brown eyes always sparkled with joy, and every time he smiled his entire face lit up. It definitely made it really easy to talk to him, mostly because he never gave her too much time to speak and be awkward. He moved forward, simply worrying about doing his job and constantly making sure everyone was having a good time. 
“Actually,” she said, “I don’t... I don’t know what I want. Maybe a cocktail, please? Nothing strong, though. I just… Yeah… I haven’t been drinking for a while, so... I think I’d rather be careful? You know? Sorry.”
Rohan tilted his head and grinned at her, watching her for a brief moment before he shook his head and chuckled.  
A flush creeped across Lia’s cheeks, and she bit the inside of her bottom lip.
“Of course!” He nodded, watching her as he took a step back and winked at her. “One minute, yeah?”
Rohan turned around and walked away, and Lia let the air out through her nose. 
Always the same thing. She just had to find a way to embarrass herself, didn’t she? 
Dropping her shoulders and peeking at her sides, she found Harry standing by the other end of the counter, chatting with the new bartender while they mixed a couple of drinks. 
He hadn’t changed much—or at all. The hair had probably been trimmed and he had clearly shaved at some point just to let his facial hair grow again, because his scruff looked just the same as three weeks ago. 
Even his t-shirt seemed to be the same one—until Lia noticed it actually had different writing and design. 
Her belly fluttered, just like it always did when she looked at him. And then, when she couldn’t decide if the fluttering was a good or bad feeling, her chest always tightened as well. 
It tightened with a mix of amazement, delight, frustration, and sadness. All at once. 
Because no matter how oblivious Harry was to it, he was the whole reason Lia had slowly become a regular at the bar. 
Sure, a great therapy session had led her to challenge herself and get a drink by herself. And then, that spur of the moment decision had taken her to the bar across the street—the only one that was open that night. 
But walking into the bar and meeting someone who would make her insides blaze wasn’t on her plans. And even considering challenging herself for a second time just a few days later definitely wouldn’t have happened if, that exact same night, she hadn’t met him.
Eleven months had gone by since that night, and yet Lia still winced every time she recalled it. 
Harry had taken her order, but hadn’t even smiled politely when doing so. He also hadn’t looked at least one bit excited about making the mojito she’d asked for (which later Lia thought tasted delicious, anyway). 
Even after that, no matter how many times she had stepped into the bar, he never even flinched when looking at her. Never. 
It was as if she didn’t even exist to him. 
So Lia had a crush on him, yes, but she wasn’t stupid. Harry had never hidden his lack of interest in getting to know her, so she knew he wasn’t into her. And she was fine with that. Really. 
She was fine with it. And she was more than used to it by now. Even if— 
“That’s Sage.”
Lia turned her head and straightened her back, only then noticing she’d been openly staring at the interaction between the two bartenders. 
“She just started, so Harry’s going over our signature drinks with her,” Rohan added, shrugging and smiling. “I know it can be hard to believe, but he’s pretty patient. A great guy once you get past the frown on his face.”
Lia smiled. She actually didn’t find that hard to believe at all, but she didn’t want Rohan to know how she really felt about his co-worker, or how much she had watched all along, so she didn’t share the thought with him. 
Instead, she glanced at the cocktail glass he’d placed on the counter and asked, “A martini?”
“Right!” Rohan slapped his open hand on the counter, as if bringing himself back to the conversation. “Apple martini, to be precise. Or, as some would say, appletini.”
Lia chuckled. “I don’t think I’ve had one of these before.”
“Hope you enjoy it, then.”
“I’m sure I will. Thank you, Rohan.”
He curled his lips into another bright and cheerful smile. “My pleasure. If you don’t like it, next one’s on me, yeah? So lemme know.”
“Okay.” Lia smiled and nodded, wrapping her fingers around the glass and pushing her weight off the counter. “I will.”
— — — — — 
Sitting by herself, Lia took the last sip of her melted apple martini just as the two young boys finished playing another pop song from their acoustic set. 
People clapped next to her, and she left the glass on the table to do the same, tilting her head and smiling at how cute and shy the pair looked on the stage. Despite the obvious age difference, they somehow reminded her of her students when they had to perform for the first time in front of an audience, which was probably why she kept feeling the need to pay attention to them and reassure them with her eyes—a way to let them know how well they were doing up there.
They thanked politely and introduced the next song, and Lia rested her chin on the palm of her hand, paying attention to the first few chords of a song she couldn’t recognize. 
Truthfully speaking, Lia was proud of herself. Even though the place was way more crowded than she was comfortable with, and even though she’d thought about leaving multiple times, she survived the thirty minutes she’d promised herself she would try to stay. 
So she knew she had already made some good progress, and that she could now go home without feeling guilty. 
She hadn’t failed. Not that night, at least.
As a gift to herself, she allowed her eyes to wander around the bar, trying to get a glimpse of Harry before she officially left. 
She found him behind the counter, of course, all focused while chatting with his two coworkers. He listened to whatever Rohan was saying, nodding along while pinching his bottom lip between his fingers. But then, something in the story caused him to widen his eyes and drop his hand to Sage’s shoulder, holding the shock on his face firmly for a moment before he finally threw his head back and laughed. Loudly. Bringing his free hand to his chest while his entire body seemed to shake. 
Lia’s belly fluttered, and she was pretty sure both of her lungs had stopped working. 
He was just so… Attractive. 
So hypnotizing. It was like she couldn’t take her eyes away from him.
And she knew how silly she was for it. For wanting him that bad. 
She knew it. But she couldn’t help it. 
She just couldn’t. 
A group of people approached the counter, and Rohan automatically got back into work mode, walking towards them. Harry and Sage were left behind, then, but they quickly seemed to engage into more conversation. Happy, interesting conversation. 
Jealousy sparked in her chest, but Lia still watched him with nothing but fascination. She watched the way he crossed his arms on his chest, and also the way he kept raising one of his hands to gesture whenever he talked to Sage. 
Lia is here. 
His words echoed inside her mind, and Lia knew, right then and there, that later at night she’d be in bed and think about the way he’d said her name. Over and over again.
She’d think about the way he treated the new girl, and she’d dream about him treating her like that, too. 
She knew it, because she’d been there before. Because after that first night at the bar, watching Harry became like a hobby to her. And because in the eleven months she’d been there, even though it hadn’t been that often, there had been a time when Lia used to see him with a woman at the bar. A girlfriend, perhaps. Someone who was obviously older than him, but just as tall, and had shoulder-length, perfectly straight, dark auburn hair. Someone who’d always seemed too elegant and sophisticated for The Wandering Triplet, and yet had never looked out of place. Effortlessly delicate and powerful at the same time. Someone who carried herself in a way that screamed confidence, as if she’d never known what it was like to feel insecure about herself. 
During those nights, when that woman used to be at the bar, Lia always stood a little bit afar, not wanting to be disrespectful to them, but still allowing herself to catch some glimpses of a completely different version of him. 
A more natural, vulnerable version. Where Harry would laugh so loud he would drop his head back, or peck her lips multiple times, and even caress her cheek in between customers. Where he would whisper in her ear, make her smile, and stare deeply into her eyes when she did all the talking. Where he would also walk her out of the bar holding her hand, or hug her waist when guiding them to his car. 
It was obvious to Lia — and probably to anyone who looked at them, to be honest — how much they appreciated each other’s company, and how much he cared for her. It was also very clear how much Harry enjoyed the affection. How much he enjoyed being touched and taken care of. 
And embarrassingly as it was, more than once Lia had woken up highly aware of dreaming about him. Recalling false, vivid memories of her replacing that woman, and of Harry touching and kissing her, instead.  
Lia shifted on her seat, withdrawing her chin from her hand and rolling her shoulders. Hoping to push those thoughts away, but also praying people never find out they even existed in the first place. 
Focusing her sight on them again, Lia caught Rohan walking back to Harry and Sage. He stood with his back turned to her, and the other two resumed their attention on whatever he had to say. 
She watched a little bit more, just to enjoy those couple minutes before she left. Music played in the background, and people chatted jazzily all around her. She couldn’t take her eyes off him, though. She just couldn’t. 
So handsome.
Harry lifted one hand, pulling his short hair back and out of the way, and then crossed his arms again. He listened to Rohan, and to everything he had to say. He focused, nodded, and offered his own comments from time to time. Giving his co-worker all his attention, solely and purely. 
Until he drifted his sight to the side and met her stare. 
Lia held her breath and gulped down, freezing as his eyes settled inside hers. 
Oh God.
Her heart palpitated. And her breathing sped up. 
It was hard to be one hundred percent sure of what was happening when he was so far away, but it was also hard to have any doubts when he was so intense that she could feel him all through her body. And when he didn’t seem to make any attempt to avoid her gaze. Or move. Or look away. 
Oh my God. Oh my God. 
Oh my God!
A heavy and empty feeling spread in her stomach, and Lia looked away. 
What the hell was even happening?
What was she supposed to do?
Why was he looking at her?
Was he actually looking at her?
She glanced back at him, and their eyes instantly met again. 
He was still watching her. 
Lia closed her hands into fists, then forced herself to breathe. Deeply. Heavily. 
Harry lifted his eyebrows and tilted his chin down. 
It was an expression she’d seen before, and that it was enough to make every single one of her muscles quiver. 
She darted her eyes back to her empty drink and blinked. 
What the hell? 
To have him staring back at her felt even worse than him saying her name or her calling him an asshole. It was like breaking the fourth wall. It was like acknowledging her existence. And Lia didn’t know what to do with that.
She rummaged for something, but it was as if her thoughts weren’t there anymore. As if her brain stopped functioning and she went completely blank.
And just like that, before she could give herself a pep talk and calm herself down, Lia had already pushed her chair away from the table and ran to the door. Stepping outside and away from the bar. 
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Curiosity killed the cat.
Or at least that was what one of Lia’s teachers always used to say. And also what crossed her mind on Friday night, when she walked into The Wandering Triplet followed by Jillie and Molly.
“Ohhh, I like this place,” Molly said, coming to a stop right behind the other two. 
“Yeah!” Jillie nodded, then linked her arm with Lia’s. “I can see why you like it here. Feels kinda cozy. Intimate.”
Lia’s mouth twitched with a smile, and she took one hand up to put her hair behind her ear. 
Dr. Reisman was so right about it. 
Going through life without opening up and sharing things wasn’t working for her. Not anymore. And yeah, it sucked that she had needed a push from her therapist and the assignment of a new task to do it, but at least she’d told them about it. 
At least she wasn’t keeping it all to herself anymore. 
“I’m glad you like it,” Lia offered, looking around and taking the place in. 
It didn’t feel too crowded this time, not yet at least. On her left side, most tables were occupied, and an older man was performing on the same tiny stage the two boys were playing the other night—his low, raspy voice blending with the soft chatting and laughing of customers. 
To her right, though, only a few people stood near the counter, giving her the perfect view of the three bartenders working behind it. 
Lia cleared her throat and diverted her eyes back to the stage.
“I guess it’s usually like this,” she added, ignoring the fact that her belly was suddenly turning upside down. “But it also depends on how crowded the other two bars are.”
“Hmm… Well,” Jillie said, turning her head to look at them, “should we get a table, then?”
Lia nodded and stepped forward. 
“Sure—” 
“Wait!” Molly placed her hands on Lia’s hips, forcing her to stay in place. “Let’s get a drink first.”
“A—Already? You sure? Now? Right now?"
“Yes.” Molly smirked. “Right now. C’mon. Wanna see that bartender of yours up close.”
“Oh God…”
Lia chuckled, mostly because she didn’t know what to say. Or do. 
Of course they wanted to see him, though. After all, it was the whole reason why they were there that night. 
At first the excitement and curiosity had happened through texts, when Lia got the courage to tell them about Harry. Their reaction had been instant, and it’d brought so much joy to her body that Lia ended up spending way more time on her phone than she should have. 
Despite letting them know it was only a crush, and that he didn’t really care about her, they both entertained the subject, asking details about the way he looked or how she’d met him. It was easy to get carried away with them, because they didn’t make it seem that deep, treating the topic lightly. Treating it as a joke. 
They also didn’t make her feel guilty or out of her mind for being attracted to him. And when she explained to them how she worried about being inappropriate for fantasizing about him, they both shared their own stories of moments when they’d fancied someone they probably shouldn’t have, and even of things they’d done with people that they probably shouldn’t have. 
It brought some sense of imperfection to her, and of humanity, and it made her breathe better. So before ending the conversation, when they asked to meet him, Lia didn’t want to say no and go back to her lonely and quiet bubble, so she agreed with them. 
And that’s how they ended up there. 
On Friday night. At the bar. 
“Oh, yes! I wanna see him, too!” Jillie let go of Lia’s arm and turned around. “C’mon.”
The idea of her gorgeous, tall, cheerful friend reaching the bar first and alone was enough to get a reaction out of her. 
“Okay, okay!” Lia looked at the floor and closed her hands into fists, then stepped forward and led the way. 
She had no idea what would come out of that night, but she knew it didn’t make sense for her to run away or avoid the situation—not even if it made her stomach swirl and turn. After all, telling her best friends about Harry and The Wandering Triplet had felt like a bold move, but also like a step she needed to take. 
And one she hadn’t regretted so far. 
"Heeyyy!” Rohan’s cheerful voice greeted as soon as Lia reached the counter, and she immediately glanced up. He approached them with a grin and open arms, easily leaving his co-workers behind. “Look who’s here!”
Lia curled her mouth into a closed-lip smile and cleared her throat. 
“H—Hi…”
“You good? It’s nice to see you! You almost never show up on Fridays.”
“Oh…” She chuckled softly, placing her hands inside the pockets of her jacket and shrugging. “I just… Yeah. I’m with my friends tonight, so… I wanted to show them around? I guess…”
“Of course!” Rohan widened his eyes, but his smile never faltered. He shifted his sight to the other girls and stood up straighter, then stretched his arm and offered his hand for them to shake. “How rude of me. Hello there, I’m Rohan.”
“Molly.”
“Jillie, hi.”
“Welcome to The Wandering Triplet, yeah? Hope you enjoy it. Any friend of Lia is more than welcome here.”
Lia shifted on her feet, then caught a glimpse of Harry moving towards the shelves. 
She hadn’t seen him again, but the intensity of his eyes was still engraved inside her mind. It had induced the most vivid dreams for the last couple of nights, and it brought a fluttery to her belly every time she thought about him. 
And she really didn’t know what to think about it, or if she even should think so much about it, but it was nice to see him again. It really was. 
He looked good, as usual, and even though she couldn’t see his face, she could see enough to know he was already frowning. Also as usual. 
For a change, though, Harry was wearing a black t-shirt. Black t-shirt, black wide legged pants, and black shoes. 
Black, black, black. 
Lia sighed. She wished he could be the one taking their orders and chatting with them. Him, instead of Rohan. At least once. 
Jillie elbowed her side, and Lia shook her head. Clearing her throat, she looked from Rohan, to Jillie, to Molly. 
They were all watching her.
She forced a chuckle out of her mouth and faced Jillie again. “What?”
“Nothing.” Jillie shrugged. “Rohan was just saying how you’re one of their favorite regulars. That’s all.”
“Oh.” Lia laughed—or tried to laugh—and shook her head again. Vehemently, this time. Almost desperately. “I don’t… No… Yeah, no… I don’t think I am.”
“Of course you are,” Rohan said, drawing all the attention back to him. “I mean, I know you’re my favorite customer, at least.”
Rohan winked, and Lia’s brain froze. Her stomach rolled before heaviness settled in, and her senses seemed to catch every detail around her: her friends coughing next to her, Sage patting Rohan’s shoulder as she walked past him, and Harry snorting and shaking his head behind him. 
Heat creeped up through her neck, face, and ears. And all she wanted was to get away from there. To be swallowed by the ground. To vanish from air. 
“Oookay…” Molly laughed, throwing her arm around Lia’s shoulder and pulling her close. “So what about getting your favorite customer and her friends two mojitos and a beer, huh?”
— — — — — 
“Your little shit!” Jillie hissed, sending her a glare and a laugh from across the table. “You’ve been hiding all this from us? I can’t believe you!”
Next to Lia, Molly laughed and shook her head. “Me neither.”
“And this Rohan guy? Oh my God! Lia! He’s so into you! What the hell?!”
“Yeah. How come you didn’t tell us about him?”
Lia shrugged. 
Rohan had always been nice, and maybe he had said a few things here and there that had made her blush before, but he had never been so straightforward with the flirting. 
Besides, she didn’t care about Rohan, so she never thought about mentioning him. Why would she? 
The girls  talked and laughed about her apparently “secret life”, but there was nothing Lia could think to say to them, so she listened. 
And as she listened, she hid her face behind the rim of the glass in her hands, then took the first sip of her mojito.
Mint and rum went down her throat, and she pursed her lips. 
It was good, but it wasn’t as good as Harry’s.
She twisted her neck and tried to catch a glimpse of the bar, but there were too many people in between. 
Her shoulders dropped, and she sighed. 
Was there even a way for her to interact with him again? 
Should she walk in early on a Wednesday evening again?
What if Sage was there, too?
Would he take the opportunity to ignore her, like he normally did?
Ugh! 
See?!
Harry was the one she wanted to talk about, not Rohan.
Why was Rohan the topic of conversation?
Lia faced the table and cleared her throat. 
Both Jillie and Molly looked at her, and she shifted on her seat. 
“Uh… So… What did you think of Harry?”
Eyeing one girl, then the other, Lia sipped her mojito again. 
Jillie shrugged.
“I was so focused on Rohan that I didn’t even pay attention to Harry, to be honest.” She stretched her neck, lifting her head towards the bar’s direction.
“I think… Damn he’s hot,” Molly admitted. 
Lia’s lips curled up. “Yeah? You think?”
“Oh yes.” Molly nodded. “The tattoos, the clothes, the hair... And not shaving but also not actually having a beard? Pft. The guy definitely knows what he’s doing.”
Lia’s smile turned into a grin. 
She had always been so afraid of her friends (and people in general) judging her, or making her feel embarrassed, that she never allowed herself to just share and enjoy things with others. And in that moment, sitting with them at the bar and gossiping about Harry, as ridiculous as she knew it would sound, she felt less alone.
Damn! She just couldn’t wait to tell Dr. Reisman all about it. She would be happy to know that Lia was finally considering her words to be correct: living outside of her tiny safe bubble could, in fact, be so good for her.
— — — — — 
A couple of hours later, Molly and Jillie hugged Lia goodnight and shared an Uber back to their homes. 
Lia stood near the bouncer and watched the car drive off, meanwhile tried to find her keys inside of her bag. 
She really needed to bring something smaller for those kinds of situations, especially considering she was only across the street from her own apartment. 
Why did she even need that much stuff?
She had never stopped to journal in the middle of a drink. And she had never done her nails outside her home. And she had never needed— 
“So she has friends, after all.”
Lia jerked her head to one side, and then to the other. It took her a moment to see him, standing alone in the darkness of the tiny alley next to the bar.
Harry was leaning on his right shoulder against the wall, his arms crossed on top of his chest and his head slightly tilted to the side. 
He smirked, and Lia’s chest tightened.
“You thought I didn’t have friends?” she blurted out, her tone softer and lower than she had intended to.
Harry shrugged, and his shoulders went up and down theatrically — dragging his crossed arms along with him while his lips curved down. 
Lia blinked and looked at the floor. 
She was convinced Harry didn’t care about her. A fact that implied he didn’t think about her, nor make assumptions about her.
Thinking again, though, she knew that wasn’t the truth. 
Because Harry made assumptions about her. For instance, he constantly assumed she went to the bar to see Rohan. He also tended to scoff and roll his eyes at her, as if she was too predictable. 
He didn’t know her, but he acted as if he did.
But... What kind of person he thought she was, then? What kind of person didn’t have any friends?
Did he actually think that low of her?
She was aware of how hard it was for her to be social, to feel comfortable around people, but she had never thought she could be perceived as someone who wasn’t capable of having any friends.
Did that even make sense?
Why did his comment make her feel so… Sad about herself? 
So... Lonely? 
So insufficient. 
So out of place.
Damn.
What was she even feeling? 
Her chest ached, and her throat felt sore, but she couldn’t point out exactly what any of that meant… How would she be able to control her emotions, if she couldn’t tell what emotions she was dealing with in the first place?
“Oh c’mon…” Harry scoffed, and even though she wasn’t looking at him, Lia could hear his eyes rolling in his voice. “I was just saying. Don’t be a baby about it.”
He sounded annoyed. 
Or maybe disappointed. 
Or maybe bored.
Lia looked up and to the left. She focused on the bouncer sitting on the stool and took a deep breath in. Watching him scroll through his phone without a single care about their interaction. 
Or maybe pretending not to have a single care about it.
Maybe he was internally laughing about the whole thing. Ready to pat Harry’s back and agree with him. Ready to admit he had no idea why Lia kept showing up over and over again. 
Another deep breath in, and Lia looked at the ground, finding her own feet.
Her boots were dirty with beer. She needed to clean them up as soon as she got home. She also needed to wash her hair, because she could definitely smell cigarettes. Were people smoking inside? Was that even allowed?
“See!”
Lia jumped. And looked up again. 
Harry snorted and turned to the side, leaning his back completely against the wall and shoving his hands inside of his pants’ pockets. Shaking his head, he murmured, “I knew talking to you was useless.”
Lia’s heart shrunk. 
Harry looked defeated. And maybe he really was, because apparently he had finally noticed how boring it was to have an actual conversation with her.
God, he made her feel so, so small.
“You—” Lia closed her eyes. She needed to speak, or she would regret it the next morning. She batted her eyes open and took a couple of steps forward, stopping only when she was in front of him. Closing her hands into fists, she breathed in, and then breathed out. “You need to… Stop.”
“Stop?”
“Yes. Stop! Stop acting like you know a thing about me, because you don’t, okay? If you… If you don’t want to know me then… Then fine. Just don’t. But stop… Just stop being such an asshole to me.”
He took his hands out of his pockets and crossed his arms on his chest. 
“Stop calling me an asshole.”
“Then stop being one!”
For a second, it seemed as if Harry’s lips twitched upwards, attempting to smile. 
But then he licked his lips, and shrugged. 
“How am I being an asshole? We don’t even talk.”
“Well… We… You… We clearly don’t, but…” She sighed and looked at the end of the alley, searching for a safe place to put her eyes and crossing her arms under her chest before she poured her honesty into him. “But when we do, you make sure to point out only the things I hate the most about myself, and that sucks.”
There was silence. A lot of silence. And if she hadn’t heard him sigh, or if she couldn’t see him through the corner of her eyes, she would’ve thought he had left.
Breathe in, Lia. 
Breathe out. 
“I know I am awkward, okay? And I know I am not fun to talk to. I know it takes me some time to answer, and I know people don’t want to be friends with me. I know all that. Trust me, I know. I know, and I hate that I am this way. But you… You have no idea how hard I try anyway. How hard I keep trying to step out of my comfort zone and just… Be different. Be better. So there’s no need to make fun of me, okay? Just let me be and I won’t bother you anymore.”
“Lia—”
“Don’t. Please. Just… I already hate myself for telling you all this. God… I—I haven’t told these things to anyone besides my therapist. And caring so much about it is another thing that I hate about myself. I know it’s stupid, I know I am old enough and shouldn’t care. I wish I didn’t but… It’s just… Anyway, I don’t need you being mean or making fun of me about it, okay? Finally talking to someone about this it’s... It was supposed to be good for me. It was supposed to… I don’t know… It was supposed to feel good and not... Not like this.”
“Listen—”
“No. Let’s just… Leave it like this, okay? Forget about it. It’s not like you ever cared about me anyway.”
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There was a reason why Lia spent most of the time inside her head: it was better than facing the reality of her life. 
And for the last twelve months or so, her mind had created a very nice and safe bubble for her to distract herself with. A bubble where she lived happily and unbothered. Where she didn’t embarrass herself. And where she didn’t mess things up. 
Her bubble was hers and only hers, but she wasn’t alone in it. Of course she wasn’t. 
Since she’d met him at the bar, and even though he had no idea about it, Harry had been there as well. 
Lia liked to look at him, she liked to wonder about him, and she liked to fantasize about him. Because Harry was hot. And sexy as hell. And because although she wasn’t into the “dark and mysterious” vibe, she couldn’t deny that Harry made her insides come to live.
He really did. 
In her dreams, Lia was sure he was everything she always secretly wanted but never had. Especially in bed.
He looked like the type of man who wasn’t nice, because he didn’t give a damn about being nice. He looked like the type of man who didn’t get attached, who was just after having a good time. Who would sleep with her, send her home, and roll his eyes at her the next time he saw her around.
He looked like the kind of man who could have any woman, at any time, without even having to try.
And Lia had always wondered how it would be like to have sex with someone like that, but she always knew it was a dangerous path to actually walk through. So when he brushed her off, or rolled his eyes at her, or didn’t even acknowledge she was there, she fed her fantasy up. But she wouldn’t be that into him if she didn’t know that’s all it was—a fantasy.
A fantasy that kept her company in her nice and safe bubble. That distracted her. That allowed her to stay by herself without losing her mind. 
And a fantasy that ended up nowhere to be seen, because the bubble in which she had been happily living and nurturing all those dreams about him had burst right in front of her. And even though she’d been stupid in the past, there was absolutely no way she was ever going to allow herself to even think about something happening between them again. Nuh-uh. 
Not at all. 
Not anytime soon. 
Not ever again. 
Only hours had gone by, but Lia was already all over the place. 
She hadn’t slept at all, too busy crying and catching up her breath. 
She didn’t think it was fair that Harry had been the one who she’d opened up to, especially because it didn’t feel like opening up to someone. It felt like begging for him not to be mean at her because she was too insecure about herself. It felt like not being strong enough to just let it go. It felt like not being confident enough to act like a woman next to him. It felt weak. It felt sad. It felt awful.
Lia had never been so vulnerable to someone. Not besides Dr. Reisman, at least. So at that moment, when it finally happened — when she finally let it all out — all she had wanted and needed was a hug. And she couldn’t ask him that. 
Of course she couldn’t.
So she had to go back to her place and go through all of it all by herself. All alone. Just like she didn’t want to be. 
Damn. Her brain hurt from so much thinking. From all the embarrassment, all the judgment, all the regret. 
She was spiraling, all over again. And because of a man, all over again. 
Another man. 
Again. 
No. No, no, no. She couldn’t go through all that again. She really couldn’t. She needed to do something. She needed to handle the situation. She had to stop it before she ended up losing herself again. 
And she was going to do it the only way she knew how—creating a new, nice, and safe bubble for herself. A bubble that could be her only world for a couple of days. 
Or for as long as it took until she felt brave enough to step out of it again.
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One day. 
Two days. 
Three.
Four. 
Five. 
Six. 
A week. 
And another one.
“They are all delicious.” Lia crossed her arms on the counter and smiled. “But yeah, Snickers was definitely my favorite one so far.”
“Really?” Cece smiled. The wrinkles around her face doubled, and her hand shook slightly as she handed Lia the card reader. “Thank you, dear. Will you be here tomorrow?”
“Hmmm… I don’t think so.” She waited for the confirmation that the payment went through, then added, “But I’ll definitely be here on Friday.”
“Good. I’ll have a slice of your favorite ready for you then. On the house.”
Lia’s smile got wider, and she was filled by this sudden need of giving that sweet lady the biggest and warmest hug. 
She couldn’t believe how long it had taken her to discover CC Tearoom, especially since it was right around the corner from her place. Cece’s hands truly turned ingredients into magic. So far, there hadn’t been a flavor that hadn’t made Lia close her eyes and hum to herself. This time, it was the Roasted Strawberries & Cream Cheesecake that had sent her over the moon, but on Monday it had been the slice of Chocolate-Peanut Butter, and the week before three other different ones.
So yeah, she should’ve been there and incorporated it into her routine a lot earlier.
Coffee and pies were so much better than mojitos, anyway. 
Besides, she obviously felt way more comfortable sitting on the corner of a welcoming and homelike coffee shop than surrounded by loud and drunk people. And the way Cece and the other baristas treated her? Wow. It only highlighted how stupid she had been going to that bar, pinning over a guy that gave her nothing but coldness and rudeness all the time. 
The mere thought of him brought a weird feeling to her belly, and Lia tried her best to push his presence out of her mind. She was getting better at it. Faster. Which was good, because it meant she suddenly wouldn’t even remember about him anymore, right?
She stepped into the summer night breeze and crossed her arms under her chest. Another day had practically gone by. Another Wednesday. Meaning it was almost the end of the week, and then a new one would start. And she would get to repeat everything all over again. 
Wake up, go to work, go home, clean up or go out for a coffee (and a slice of cheesecake), get ready for the next day, and go to bed. From Monday to Monday. With an exception here and there — like grocery shopping and doing laundry on the weekends instead of going to work, and also going downstairs and visiting Mrs. Jones for some knitting or a few rounds of card games. 
The latest activity had happened for the first time only last Saturday afternoon, but Lia was keen on the idea of making it a habit. Mrs. and Ms. Jones had been living on the second floor of her building for years. They were known by most neighbors as the couple who was always bickering, but could never stay away from each other. And despite Ms. Jones’ explicit complaints about everything and everyone, everybody seemed to like them a lot—probably because no-one took his grumpiness very seriously. 
She turned around the corner and looked down at her feet. Her hair blew across her eyes, blocking her view of the black sneakers her parents had given her last Christmas. They were kind of loose on her feet, but at least she wasn’t wearing those white shoes anymore. Or any other color, for that matter. At least she’d gone back to her black neutral low-key outfits. 
Taking one hand up, she pulled her hair over her shoulders, then tucked some strands behind her ear. 
She focused on the way her legs carried her back to her building, tracing the well-known path her steps absently followed everyday. 
There was nothing like a safe, quiet, and laid-back routine, was it?
No, there wasn’t.
It was all she needed. 
All she had wanted.
To be okay.
And she had finally achieved it, hadn’t she?
“Lia!”
Out of nowhere, the voice hit her like thunder. Her body staggered for a moment, and the sound lingered inside her. 
It was Harry, wasn’t it? 
Calling her name?
Her heart raced, and a flush of adrenaline tingled through her body. 
No. Of course not. 
How could it be? 
Why would it be?
“Lia, hey!”
Shit. 
Another thunder, and another shock to speed up her heart. Except this time she didn’t stop moving — she walked even faster. 
She was afraid to be right, she didn’t want to be right, but deep down she had no doubts. She knew it was him. 
She also hoped it would be.
“Wait!”
He sounded louder, and Lia knew that when thunder got louder, it meant lighting was getting closer. 
Her heart pounded inside of her chest, and a low buzz rang in her ears.
She closed her hand into a fist, tightening her fingers around her keys. Maybe she could get away with pretending she didn’t hear him. Maybe, if she just walked fast enough, she would reach the door and get inside before he called again. Maybe she could run up the front steps. There were only six of them... Or were they seven? It didn’t matter. Once she got inside her building, she would be fine. 
“Lia, please! Hey!”
Just get the key and open the door, Lia. C’mon… C’mon! That’s it! Now, just get inside. Go, go, go!
With shaking hands, she pushed the front door of her building and took a step inside. 
“Lia, c’mon! Just, please—Hey, stop!”
Harry’s hand banged against the door, and his heavy breathing echoed between the four walls of the tiny lobby.
Lia turned on her feet with a gasp, finding Harry with his mouth open and one arm stretched out, leaning his weight on the still open door while catching his breath.
Not fast enough, Lia. Not fast enough. 
“I just—Fucking hell…” Harry breathed out, chest going up and down densely. He looked down and shook his head, then faced her again. “We need… We need to talk."
Lia crossed her arms and stepped backwards. She pulled her eyebrows together as she looked at him and took her very own version of shaky breaths. 
Exact eighteen days had gone by since she’d last seen him. She knew it, because she’d been counting them — as embarrassing and ridiculous as it sounded. 
She had been counting them because she was determined to make the number get higher and higher. 
So, so determined. So careful, and so mindful of everything. 
That’s why she walked her own street with her head down — to avoid even getting a glimpse of him walking in or out of the bar. She lived as if the place didn’t exist anymore. As if she’d never stepped in there. As if she didn’t even care about what the place could be past the door. 
She hadn’t counted on the possibility of Harry running after her, though. 
After all, why would he? 
Why did he? 
He was there, flesh and bone, in the lobby of her building. Trying to talk to her. To her.
And just like any other time before, Harry looked just… Stunning. 
Absolutely and unfairly stunning. 
Wearing all black, just like the last time she’d seen him. Just like when she’d snapped at him and made a fool of herself. When he’d made her realize she needed to take a step back from him.
A tingle spread on her stomach. 
She swallowed down, then tightened the grip of her crossed arms. 
Under the black fabric of her plain t-shirt, Harry’s body seemed thick with muscle. His arms looked too big for those short sleeves, something she’d already noticed and thought about before. Something she usually enjoyed paying attention to. 
Breathe in, breathe out, Lia. 
Breathe in, breathe out.
Her stomach tingled again, except this time it heated all over her body.
His strong, imposing figure had always sparked inside her a flush of craving for him. It had been the reason for so many of her not-so-innocent dreams, and the encouragement for so many of her hidden fantasies. She couldn’t recall a time in her life when she had desired a man like that, and it saddened her to think there was nothing she could do about it. 
“Please?” Harry insisted, sliding his hand down through the thick wood, but still holding the door open. 
Great. She had forgotten to speak. Again.
Lia blinked. And swallowed. “W–why?”
Her voice was shaking just as much as her hands had been seconds before, but she couldn’t allow herself to think too much about that. She didn’t even care, to be honest. All she wanted to know and all she cared about was why. 
Why was Harry there? 
Why did Harry want to talk to her? 
Why couldn’t she just forget about it? 
Why couldn’t she just move on? 
Why couldn’t she just be different? 
Why couldn’t her life be different? 
Why couldn’t things be different? 
Why couldn’t they be easier?
Why?
Why?! 
Why?!
“Because you deserve an apology.”
Lia blinked again. Once, and then a couple more times. 
His words not only didn’t answer most of her questions, but also created a bunch of new ones. 
What was he even doing? 
Was he being serious? 
Or was it all just a joke to him?
“I just—I don’t—” She drew her eyebrows closer and closer, until her forehead creased and wrinkled.
"Look,” Harry said, pausing only to take a deep breath in and pull his hair back. “I know I don’t deserve it, and I get that you don’t want to listen… But I just need a minute, that’s all. Just give me a minute and I’ll be out of your way. I promise. Please.”
Lia bit the insides of her bottom lip. 
Generally speaking, Lia didn’t think she would’ve been able to say no to him, because she honestly didn’t want to say no to him. Still, any doubts that could’ve dared to cross her mind and make her second guess her decision disappeared as she looked at him—as she truly looked at him.
Because everything about Harry looked just the same as always, but somehow he looked completely different from any other time before.
Maybe it was because she’d never seen him in such a casual context—after all, they had never met or talked to each other in any circumstance that didn’t involve the bar. 
Shit. 
Would she even be able to hold a real conversation with him? 
A sigh left her mouth, and Lia dropped her shoulders.
It wasn’t even about that, was it? That is, what felt different. It wasn’t about the context or the place. Right? It was something else… Something about the way he looked at her, perhaps… Something about the way he seemed to carry softness and worry in his stare. Two things she hadn’t seen on him before. Not aiming towards her, at least.  
“Okay.” Her voice was soft, and it took her by surprise — she definitely hadn’t planned on speaking up.  
And apparently it took Harry by surprise, too, because he widened his eyes and asked, “Okay?” 
Lia swallowed, and nodded once. 
“Really?” he insisted. 
“Yes… Okay.”
“Ok,” he repeated, mimicking her previous nod. He stared inside her eyes for a moment, then glanced down to the floor. It was hard to tell what was crossing his mind as he silently shuffled on his feet, or when he took his free hand up and pulled his hair back. “Right. Yeah, ok. Let’s talk, then.”
Lia pressed her lips together and waited for him to speak up first, mostly because she couldn’t think of one single thing to say to him. 
Harry, on the other hand, stood there with furrowed brows and puzzled eyes, as if he was going through his own personal battle inside his own mind. 
Until, eventually, he shook his head and cleared his throat.
“Sorry.” He stepped forward, and as he walked inside, he let the door go and looked over his shoulder, watching until it fully closed behind him. 
There was a pause, in which he took the time to face her again and shove his hands inside of his pockets. 
And then, serious and determined, Harry spoke again. “To be completely honest, I didn’t think this through. I’ve just been thinking a lot about what happened, so I wanted to apologize to you. Because I’m really sorry for the other night. And also… Well, for everything else.”
“You don’t have to,” Lia said, and she hated how she sounded way more fragile and unsure than she wanted to. “Apologize, I mean. It’s fine.”
Harry squinted, and his forehead wrinkled. 
“Of course I do. Everything you said the other night was—”
“Please.” She shook her head and looked away from him, tightening her arms around herself. “I—I don’t…”
Her mouth was incredibly dry, and there was an empty feeling in the pit of her stomach that was getting hard to ignore. It was heavy, and it hurt. 
She closed her hands into fists, then dug her nails into her palms to prevent herself from getting lost inside her mind. She focused on the mailboxes on the wall to her left, looking for her name that had been printed and attached under the number of her apartment so many months ago. 
“I don’t want to talk about what I said. Like, I really don’t wanna talk about it.”
Harry sighed. 
“Lia…”
“It’s fine, okay? Let’s just forget about everything.”
“I don’t think that’s—”
The front door opened, and Lia turned her head to the new movement. 
“I said I don’t care,” Mr. Jones’ said, his unmistakable voice reaching her ears before she could even see him. He walked in with a frown, but stopped to hold the door open for his wife. “Told you I don’t like the boy.”
Harry looked at his feet and took a step to the side, getting away from the entrance.
“You never like them, Walter,” Mrs. Jones replied with her sweet and shaky voice, walking slowly right behind him. “You’re being worse than—Oh.”
As soon as the woman met Lia’s eyes, she curled her lips into a sweet, wrinkled and excited smile. 
“Good night, sweetheart! Didn’t see you there!”
“How?” the man muttered, closing the door while his wife walked a few more tiny steps forward. “They’re standing right in the way!”
Mrs. Jones kept smiling and rolled her eyes, waving her quivering hand in the air. 
“Forgive my husband. He finds pleasure in being rude. And grumpy."
Lia forced a polite chuckle out of her mouth, aware that the few hours she’d spent with them over the weekend had been enough to reveal how behind the grumpiness there was a very funny and very caring man. 
“‘M just telling the truth,” Mr. Jones muttered again. “Are they or are they not in the way?”
“Of course they aren’t, Walter.” Mrs. Jones dragged her feet through the lobby, right towards Lia and Harry’s direction. “There’s more than enough space for all of us to stand here.”
“But I don’t want to stand here, Mora. I want to go upstairs.”
“You can go ahead if you want. I still need to check the mail.”
Lia stepped backwards, giving the elder lady more room to cross between them and get to the mailboxes. 
Mr. Jones grunted at the same time Harry sighed, and Lia pressed her lips together to hold herself back from laughing—or even smiling. 
“I finished the scarf we started the other day,” Mrs. Jones said. “You should drop by for some coffee and see the result.”
Lia nodded. “Of course. This weekend, maybe?”
“Sounds good, dear. Do you like apple pie?” 
“Sure.”
“I’ll make some, then.”
Mrs. Jones was sweet, she truly was. But as much as Lia didn’t want to admit, they were the worst neighbors that could’ve shown up at the lobby and interrupted them. Because she knew how unhurriedly they lived their lives, and she knew how long it could take them to finally go upstairs. 
Besides, she didn’t think they were even aware they had interrupted something, so she also didn’t think they were aware that their presence was holding a conversation back. 
Mrs. Jones hummed to herself while finally going through the same mailbox she opened everyday, and Harry cleared his throat. 
When Lia looked at him, she found his eyes already watching her. He stood with his hands still inside of his pockets, but the previous softness on his face had been replaced by a clenched jaw and lips pressed together into a line. 
“I think I should go back,” he said.
“Oh. O-okay.”
“Yeah. This isn’t—” 
“Walter, look!” Mrs. Jones blurted out. “We got another grocery coupon!”
Harry shut his mouth, rolled his eyes, and looked up at the ceiling. 
“Those sales are garbage,” Mr. Jones mumbled, standing near the stairs. 
“Of course they aren’t,” the woman scoffed. “We get some very nice meals out of them.”
She opened the magazine, eying the content on the first two pages. 
“Let’s see what we find today,” she added. “Maybe they’ve got some apples. For my apple pie.”
“Ugh. I wanna go upstairs, Mora…”
Harry rolled his shoulders and faced Lia again, instantly locking his green eyes with hers. 
He looked frustrated, or maybe annoyed, and somehow she understood the feeling. Because she was frustrated, too—she didn’t want Harry to leave yet, and she more than definitely didn’t want to miss the opportunity to spend a few more minutes with him, or to listen to what else he could have to say. 
So whilst he had been interrupted, she had been denied the opportunity to be around him. And all she could think about was how much she wanted for him to stay around. How much she wanted to keep listening to him, and how much she wanted for him to keep talking to her.  
Lia’s fingers twitched, and her heartbeat sped up. 
She loosened up the grip of her fists, opening and closing her hands a few times. Then, still stuck inside of his green eyes, she took a deep breath in through her nose, licked her lips and voiced quietly, “We can… I mean… Do you want to go upstairs? We can talk there… Y’know, if you want to.”
Harry widened his eyes. 
“You sure?”
“Y-yeah. But it’s fine if you have to go. I just… I mean…” 
“Upstairs sounds great.” He nodded. “Thank you.”
Lia nodded, too. 
She didn’t give herself time to think about what her words could imply. 
She couldn’t allow herself to think about what Harry being inside her apartment would mean, because if she did, she would send him away. 
And after everything she’d been through, there was absolutely no way Lia would ever forgive herself if she just sent him away.
— — — — — 
The walk upstairs was awfully silent, but Lia didn’t know what she could say to him. She wasn’t good at small talk, and she didn’t want to be the one to bring up their previous conversation. So she distracted herself by fidgeting with her keys, cursing when she dropped them, and blushing when Harry picked them up for her. 
“Shit.” 
“Here.” 
“Thanks.”
“No problem.”
Those were the only words they spoke, then everything went silent again. 
Breathless and with a pounding heart, Lia couldn’t tell if it was from walking too many flights of stairs or from the fact that she was about to take Harry inside of her apartment. 
The moment she didn’t give herself to think before inviting him, hit her between the first and second floor, and it was only downhill from then on.
What was wrong with her?
What was she even thinking?! 
Well, actually she wasn’t thinking. Of course. That had been the whole point, right? She didn’t think, because if she did, she wouldn’t have invited him. She knew she wouldn’t. Of course she wouldn’t! Because she shouldn’t have!
How could she be so freaking stupid? 
It’s just… She didn’t even know him! And in the few and short interactions they’d shared in the past several months, he had been nothing but rude and unfairly mean to her. 
So, yeah, that was such, such a terrible idea!
She’d just spent days—weeks—deeply regretting sharing her insecurities with him. Pondering about how it was time to finally move on and forget about that crush. And yet there she was again: about to let Harry burst another one of her tiny bubbles. About to open up the front door of her tiny apartment and let him in; then turn on the lights and allow him to see the insides of her safest and most personal space.
So, so stupid!
Lia reached the landing before the last set of steps and exhaled slowly, letting the air out of her mouth as if she could also release all the tension out of her body. 
They were almost there. 
It was getting real. It was about to happen. 
And she’d have to deal with the situation. 
There was no going back anymore. 
Or, well… 
Maybe there was, but… 
Did she really want to go back?
No. Of course she didn’t. 
She lifted her arm and pointed her keys ahead, aiming at the second door. 
“We’re—” Her voice faltered, and heat spread through her cheeks. “Sorry.” She cleared her throat. “We’re here.” 
She walked forward, then focused on putting the key in the lock without trembling. Once she succeeded, she pushed the door open and stepped inside, then reached for the switch and turned the light on. 
“Sorry for the mess,” she said, hanging her keys on the wall. 
Lia wasn’t a messy person, but she hadn’t bothered with cleaning up her apartment in the last two days. 
In her defense, though, she wasn’t expecting any guests. Wednesday or not, people never showed up at her place out of nowhere. She didn’t invite anyone she didn’t feel comfortable with, and those who visited knew her well enough to always give her a heads up.
Two things Harry hadn’t done. 
He seemed an exception to absolutely everything in her life so far. 
“Don’t worry about it,” Harry said. He kept his distance, but still stood close enough for her to feel his presence behind her. “You should see my place.”
There was a playful scoff at the end of his sentence, and Lia knew he was only being polite by insinuating how messier his own place was, but still, the prospect of visiting Harry’s home made her insides twinkle.
She had absolutely no idea where he lived, or who he lived with—was it a house? An apartment? Did he live with his family? Did he have any roommates? Did he live by himself? Did he have any pets? 
Did he have a girlfriend?
Harry had never given Lia the chance for her to ask anything about his life. He had never given her the chance to get to know him. 
If he had, Lia liked to believe she would’ve been brave enough to ask him everything she always wanted to know about him—about his family, his hobbies, his childhood, and even about his dreams. 
He had an accent, so was she correct by assuming he was British? Was his family from there, too? Why did he leave the UK? Did he have any siblings, or was he an only child? Did he see them often? If not, did he miss them?
“It’s really nice here,” Harry said. 
“Um… Yeah.” Lia shrugged. “It’s a good place to live, I guess.”
Up on the fourth floor, her rented apartment wasn’t big, nor fancy. To be honest, she’d always found everything about the place normal and simple, which felt more than enough for her. The space was limited, but it had never felt cramped. A living room and an open-concept kitchen, with only a counter setting the limits between them, and then a tiny hallway that led to the bedroom and the bathroom. 
And that was it. That was all she had to offer.
“You should… I mean,” Lia said, walking further into the living room. “Make yourself comfortable, and all that…”
She walked past the coffee table and the messy remains of her laziness from the night before. After the dark gray counter, she rubbed both hands against her jeans, then turned another light on. Just at the same time, the front door clicked, and she jumped around.
Harry stood awkwardly by the dark wood, his hands hidden inside of his pockets, just like before.
“Sorry.” She leaned her side against the end of the counter. “I’m not… I’m not used to having people over, so… I’m not good at this.”
Harry shrugged, curling his lips up just slightly. “I think you’re doing great.”
Lia snorted and looked down at her feet, then crossed her arms under her chest. “Sure.”
“Look, about the—”
“Who’s at the bar?” She blurted out. “Shouldn’t you be there?”
“Uh, yeah… I should, but Sagey is there. She’s covering for me.”
Lia nodded.
“Right.”
Sagey.
The way the nickname for his coworker rolled so easily out of his tongue made her want to crawl into his arms. It screamed affection, and trust, and for a moment she envied the fact that someone could so easily be part of his life.
She closed her eyes for a second, then looked over her shoulder and back to the kitchen.
“Do you want some coffee?”
“No, thanks. Actually—”
“Tea?” 
“I—”
“You’re British, right?” She faced him again. “Do you really drink tea or is that just a myth?”
Harry tilted his head to the side and pursed his lips, watching her. And then, after a moment, he just dropped his head down and chuckled. 
The joyful, beautiful, and yet discreet sound that came out of his mouth was unexpected, and it once again made Lia’s heartbeat get faster and louder. 
“I am British, yeah,” Harry finally said, then looked up at her. The remains of a smile still dancing through his lips. “But I’m good, thank you.”
“Oh. Okay.”
“Maybe some other time, though?”
The chances of her and Harry ever meeting at her apartment again didn’t seem likely, let alone for them to have a coffee or tea together. But she wouldn’t tell him that. 
Instead, she nodded, and looked down at her feet. “Sure. Another time.”
“Good. Now, do you have any other questions, drinks to offer, or…”
Lia widened her eyes and darted her sight back to him.
She had been rambling a lot, hadn’t she? Not letting him talk and interrupting with awkward and stupid questions and… Shit.
“I’m so sorry,” she said, shaking her head and straightening up her body. That had been so rude of her! “Really, I… I didn’t mean to keep interrupting you. Sorry.”
“C’mon, it’s fine,” Harry said, taking a step forward and closer to the couch. “I’m just teasing you.”
“It’s just... I’m—I’m nervous, I think? I mean, usually when I’m nervous I just shut up? So I don’t… I don’t really know why I can’t stop talking right now,  but... Maybe... I don’t know. I guess… I guess this is a different kind of ’nervous’? I mean… I don’t… Yeah. I—I don’t know. Sorry. Shit. I’ll just shut up now. Sorry.”
She chuckled, but quickly regretted it, letting the sound fade in the silent air around them. It felt awkward, as if she was forcing the fun out of her body. And maybe she truly was, because she didn’t feel like laughing—she just thought it would be polite to do so. That it would be better if she looked happy, instead of insecure. Or nervous. Or sad. 
“Lia, I don’t…” Harry looked down, took a deep breath in, and shook his head. When he met her eyes again, his tone—along with his actions—was clearly softer, careful. Almost afraid. “Look, I’m the only one who should be apologizing here. That’s why I’m here, isn’t it? And I am sorry Lia, I really am. Those things you said the other night were—"
“It’s okay.” Lia shook her head and stepped towards the couch. “Like I said, I really don’t want to talk about any of the things I said.”
She grabbed the blanket she’d left there the night before, wrapping it as best as she could and holding it onto her chest. 
“But I—”
“Those were very personal things for me to share okay? And I just— Please… I mean… I can’t—I don’t want to talk about it.” 
“Ok. Yes. Of course. I shouldn’t… I don’t want to force you to talk about it. I just need to make sure you know how sorry I am for making you feel that way. Because I really am.”
Shit. 
She turned around, dropping the cozy and warm fabric on the armchair. 
“It’s fine.”
“It’s not fine, c’mon. I was out of line and shouldn’t have treated you like that.” 
Lia sighed. 
What did he want her to say? 
Yes, he’d hurt her, but she was trying to move on. So relieving the whole situation wouldn’t help her. 
Besides, it wasn’t Harry’s fault if she didn’t know how to talk or interact with people. 
“Lia…” he called. 
She dropped her arms to her sides, then turned to face him once again. 
She really didn’t want to talk about it. 
“Can you please let it go? It’s just… I shouldn’t have said anything. And I’m really embarrassed about the whole thing.”
He hid his hands inside his pockets and shrugged.
“I’m embarrassed, too. Acted like a proper… What was it? Oh right, like an asshole.” 
Lia’s mouth curled up into a smile, and she bit her bottom lip to hold it back.
Despite the embarrassment, a part of her felt proud of herself for calling him out that night. Both nights. Standing up to people was really hard for her. She almost never cursed out loud, nor disrespected people in any way, so calling Harry an asshole—more than once—had felt like crossing a bridge.
Still, it didn’t mean she thought it was a nice thing to do. Or that he couldn’t have found it offensive.
“Sorry… For calling you an asshole.”
Harry curled one side of his mouth up. “I totally deserved it.”
There was a playful tone in his voice, but the way he was suddenly looking at her made it impossible for Lia to react.
Dark green irises fixed on her, they drifted all over her face. 
Even standing on opposite sides of the living room, Harry focused on her in a way he hadn’t focused before. Giving her all of his attention. As if he was studying her every detail. Or as if he had never seen her before. Or as if he was mapping every left and right to remember a path he’d trail later in time. 
To be honest, it would be difficult for Lia to explain, but something about his stare made her stomach flutter. It caused a flush of shyness to spread from her shoulders to her neck, and all over her face. 
At the same time, though, his gaze comforted her. It made her feel like he was trying his best to be gentle to her. It made her feel like he was being honest with her. Like he somehow cared for her.
“Shit,” Harry murmured, breaking the moment and looking down to his pants. He pulled his phone out of his pocket, staring at the screen as it flashed between his fingers. “It’s Sagey.”
Oh. 
He sighed, yet didn’t make any effort to act on it. 
“I should go back.” 
Lia cleared her throat, then crossed her arms under her chest. 
“Right. Of course.”
“I wouldn’t, but…”
“You have to work.”
“Yeah.”
Time froze as they silently looked at each other. 
It felt exciting, even though at moments it took everything inside her not to run away from the intensity of his gaze. 
“Sagey is still getting used to everything,” he suddenly added. “And I know she can handle it, but I don’t wanna leave her by herself for too long. Can be kind of hectic sometimes.” 
Lia shrugged, pulling her lips into the most genuine smile she could find inside her. “You don’t need to explain yourself.” 
“I know, yeah. I just…”
Harry looked down, and Lia tilted her head to the side.
What, Harry? 
You just... What?!
He sighed.
“You believe I’m sorry, right?”
Lia didn’t have to force a smile after his words—it came out naturally as she nodded.
“I do, yes.”
“Ok. Good.” He looked over his shoulder, towards the door. “I’ll get going, then.”
“Right. Let me open the door for you.” Lia walked around the coffee table, as fast and as far away from him as she could.
Hopefully, he wouldn’t mind the fact that she wasn’t going to walk him downstairs—she didn’t think she would be able to handle any more awkward conversations with him.
Harry followed her lead, taking a few steps closer to the door before he cleared his throat. 
“You should come by tonight… If you’re free, of course.”
As she opened the door, Lia furrowed her brows. She stepped aside, then faced him again. 
Harry chuckled, shrugging lightly and walking outside. 
“To the bar, I mean. Feel like I owe you a drink.” 
Oh… 
Lia rested her temple against the frame, half-smiling at him. “You don’t owe me anything.”
“Yeah, I do. For being rude to you.”
“Harry, stop. I—”
“Look,” he said, raising both hands in the air and showing his palms to her, “all I’m offering you is a free drink. That’s all, ok? No pressure.”
There was no way she was going to walk into the bar that night, or any other any time soon. But he didn’t need to know that, so Lia bit back a smile, and nodded.
“Okay. Sure. Thank you, then.”
“Ok.” Harry smiled. “Great. Then… I guess I’ll… Well…” 
“Yes?”
“Bye, Lia.”
“Bye, Harry.”
“Have a good night.”
Lia chuckled. “Thanks. You too.” 
“See you soon.”
“See you.” 
“Bye.”
“Goodbye, Harry.”
“Actually…” 
He ran back up, and Lia laughed.
“Oh my God.”
“Sorry.” He smiled. “I was just wondering, and you can say no if you want, of course, but… Would it be okay for me to ask your phone number?”
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(TWO)
96 notes · View notes
bbernard-03 · 2 days
Text
Begin Again
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˚。 ❀ ˚。The Beginning˚。 ❀ ˚。
Summary: The weight of it all finally gets too much, and the decision is made, but will the kind words of a stranger be enough to shine a light into the blinding darkness?
Warnings: use of y/n, mentions of suicidal thoughts/suicide
thank you @bernardsbendystraws for proofreading and being the best <3
**i do not consent to my work being copied, used for inspiration, or republished**
prologue <- -> next part
----------
Two weeks ago, I was prepared to take my own life. The decision made, the plan in place, the letter… almost written. The plan was halted when a brown-haired, ocean-eyed stranger reminded me why life was worth living. Why my story was worth completing. Matt spent hours with me that night discussing everything from dreams and fears to thoughts and memories. He breathed life back into me, and I will never be able to repay him for that. 
Today, I was walking down the streets of the small town I had escaped to, facing the daily challenge that Matt had so graciously deemed upon me: Do something for yourself. After much deliberation and argument, I walked towards an ice cream shop I used to love as a kid. The happy memories were plagued with the dark events in the years that followed. I paused as I approached the double doors, taking a shaky breath. I took out my phone and typed out a message.
Y/N:
I can’t do it. 
I stared at the screen, watching the bubbles appear almost instantly in the bottom corner. 
Matt: 
Yes, you can. Remember, there are things worth living for. You’re working on finding them. 
I sigh and gnaw at my bottom lip. 
Y/N:
I’m trying. I really am. But I don’t think I can do this. It’s too much. 
Matt: 
Look up, sweetheart. 
I lifted my eyes and saw Matt standing a few feet away with a comforting smile as he approached me. He placed his hand on my shoulder, his thumb gently caressing the bare skin. 
“You can do this. You have to do something for yourself. Ice cream is a treat, right?” He asks softly, his words firm and encouraging. 
“Yeah, ice cream’s a treat. I just..” My voice trails off as I stare at the ice cream parlor before me. “I just haven’t been here in a very long time.” My voice is soft, filled with nostalgia and a hint of pain. 
“Do you want to try something else?” He offers gently. Despite my stubbornness and hesitations, in the past two weeks, he has never once lost his patience with me. 
“No,” I say softly. “This used to be my favorite place.. This is for me.” I say with as much confidence as possible, which isn’t much. He smiles softly at me. 
“Lead the way.” 
I shakily grasp the door handle and pull it open, the familiar scent filling my nose as I step through the door, Matt following closely behind. 
“Oh, our little Rainbow!” A voice exclaims from behind the counter. My head snapped up as I saw Belinda, the older woman who runs the shop. 
“Mrs.B!” I exclaim happily as she rounds the counter and crushes me in a hug. 
“It has been too long, my girl. You’re all grown up. Let me look at you!” She states and holds me at arm's length as she examines every part of me. “Your hair is longer.” She says softly. 
“I decided to grow it out.” I smile softly. “It’s so good to see you, Mrs.B.” 
“I love it; it suits you and makes you look like an adult.” She smiles widely and then notices Matt. “And who’s this?” She asks with a slight smirk on her face. 
“This is Matt,” I say with a smile. “Just a friend, Mrs.B.” I giggle and turn to Matt. “She tends to romanticize everything.”
“I can’t help being in love with love!” She exclaims with faux dramatics. “You want your usual, Rainbow?” I can’t help but smile at the fact that she remembers my order despite it having been almost ten years since I’ve set foot in the shop. 
“Yes, please, Mrs.B. One for Matt too,” I say sweetly. 
Five minutes later, we’re both sitting at a small booth in the corner of the shop, sipping strawberry milkshakes. I hum lightly along with the music and glance around at the parlor. Nothing had changed in the last decade and it’s oddly comforting. 
“What’re you thinking about, hm?” Matt asks, looking at me curiously. 
“Just how much nothing has changed here. It’s.. comforting.” I smile softly at him. 
“How often did you use to come here?” He questions gently. 
“Every day, every summer.. Until I was 13.” I glance around again as if trying to memorize every detail. 
“Why’d you stop?” His question, seemingly innocent, creates a heavy pit in my stomach. 
“Mom and Dad got divorced that spring. Nobody was really up for family vacations after that.” I say quietly, omitting most of the details, unsure if it was for his or my benefit. Matt looked at me curiously, almost instantly knowing there was more to the story but choosing to pick his battles in breaking down my walls. 
“I’m sorry that happened,” he spoke softly. “This seems like a very special place, especially to you.” 
“It was.. Is.. This town, this shop, it was the focal point of my childhood. The happiest memories I have.” My voice was dripping with heartache as I recalled all the years spent here before my family crumbled to pieces. 
Matt and I sat in comfortable silence for the rest of the visit. The only sound being the hum of the machine and occasional conversations between Mrs.B and customers. Despite the ache in my chest remembering the happy moments, I can’t help but feel a sliver of relief that I’m here. I’m making new memories, happy ones. I look at Matt, a small smile on my face. He was the reason I was here. 
“What?” He asks with a soft chuckle. “Do I have something on my face?” He wipes around his mouth. 
“No,” I giggle. “I.. I’m just.. I feel a little better than okay right now.” My words are met with Matt's bright smile. 
“I am so glad, sweetheart.” He reaches across and squeezes my hand before pulling it back. He’s made sure to respect my personal space these past two weeks, never having physical contact with me more than necessary. Another fact on the list of why he’s the best person I’ve ever met. 
“I’m grateful for you,” I say simply. He looks at me, and I can see the happiness on his face. 
Once we finish our milkshakes, we begin the stroll back. The air swirling around us, the hint of saltiness from the ocean soothing every ache in my soul. I take in my surroundings inch by inch. A flower had bloomed more than it was yesterday, I saw a new face pass by us, a little girl hugged her Mom after getting a toy. Joy. A feeling I had almost forgotten existed. 
This was where I was meant to be. I think.
66 notes · View notes
squinch-depraved · 2 days
Note
ted, cnc, but make it keeping reader stoned for freeuse purposes
do you see the vision?
you beautiful genius i see the vision and it is glorious - i hope our vision is the same because this was really fun... got rlly intense sooo yaya
CW: cnc, somno, free use, drugging someone, marijuana usage, she/her used, MDNFI
ted tossed your dab pen back to you after taking a long drag from it, pulling the smoke deep into his lungs and expelling it upwards with his head tilted back. you copied him, drawing a large cloud from the cart and hacking a few short coughs while he laughed at you.
"you're a bigger stoner than i am, how are you coughing from that?" he chuckled.
you whipped your head around to glare at him. "coughing isn't indicative of experience smoking, ted. i'm disappointed in you, you should know better." your voice was dry and matter-of-fact. "plus, i took a blinker and you didn't." you leaned back onto the couch and stared up at the ceiling, pen still clutched in your hand.
it was quiet for an unquantifiable stretch of time, distorted by the drugs you were sharing, until ted spoke. "you still down for our agreement?" his voice was quiet but hopeful.
your eyes opened (not that you had noticed they closed, you were so relaxed) and you thought back on the deal you made with him. you were only staying at his place for a long weekend, three nights and heading home monday. it was the second day, two more sleeps to go before you had to leave your boyfriend's safe haven of an apartment and head back to your chaotic life. ted had pleaded on discord calls between the two of you for weeks before you flew out to l.a., begging you to let him get you stoned beyond your usual limits and take advantage of you. the idea was actually very appealing, and the thought of what he would do to you fueled your late-night vibrator sessions whenever he couldn't be there in a call with you. you took another long hit off your pen and and spoke as you exhaled it.
"you have my full permission to do whatever you want to me teddy."
he grinned and shifted towards you slightly. "as much as i want? all day?"
you nodded and met his eyes. "all day."
he lunged at you, kissing you deeply before he made a noise and broke away to get up and walk to the kitchen.
"where're you going??" you whined, eyes glassy and hair tousled.
"bought you some edibles. i want you gone for me," his voice carried through the apartment.
"if you bring me a whole nerds rope, the agreement is off," you taunted.
he snorted and shuffled back to the couch, handing you a large, square gummy, and looked at you impatiently until you took it from him. "whole thing. eat it," he instructed.
"oh, my god, ted, this thing is huge! how much is this? am i gonna pass out?"
he rolled his eyes and sat down next to you, putting on a movie to watch while it kicked in. "it's from the dispensary down the street, and it's just a little bit more than the ones we usually take. you'll be fine," he replied, before mumbling a, "probably."
with a deep breath, you popped the square in your mouth, not realizing until you had swallowed it that you hadn't eaten at all for the day. oh well, you thought. i'm already in too deep. and so you surrendered to your high, trying your best to pay attention to the obscure film he put on to trip you out. when it finished, ted looked over at you as the credits rolled. your eyes were red and lidded, mouth hanging open in surprise at the ending as you slowly processed what you could. he smirked hungrily while he watched you for a second before reaching over and pulling your pants off, laying you on your back and pushing the stolen hoodie of his you were wearing up so he could see your breasts.
you mumbled something he couldn't understand as he eagerly stretched you on his fingers, bending your legs back so he had a better view of your dripping hole. "ted, teddy, ngh- fuck!" you mewled when he finally pressed his lips to your clit. he sucked at your sensitive nub, working and curling his fingers still while he sloppily ate you out. you glanced down at him and he shifted his eyes to look directly into yours, cutting right through you. a loud, drawn out moan tore from your lips as you laid your head back down, nearly covered by the wet sounds of ted making out with your pussy.
"ted, 's getting to be too much," you cried, your own words echoing in your ears as the room began spinning. he gave your ass a quick smack and started swirling his tongue faster, holding you down when you inevitably began to squirm. "i- i can't, please, teddy, i feel so much! can't handle it! please stop!"
you bucked your hips frantically, trying both to get away from his face and bring it impossibly closer. he moaned into your core and smacked you again, much harder this time. you screamed pitifully as you clenched your thighs around his head, crying out, "stop!! baby, please, i'm gonna.." you trailed off when you started seeing stars, only able to make nonsensical noises while tears flowed down your cheeks. you swore you felt him grin against you and prayed he would finally stop, but he just kept going.
you have no idea how long you laid there, being devoured by your boyfriend like that. your sense of time was beyond fucked, and all you could do was occasionally beg, "stop? please?" before getting slapped again. he was going to eat until he had his fill, and you were going to have to deal. when he finally pulled away, you looked down at him and your stomach flipped. his face was red, lips puffy and wet, stubble soaked by your essence, and his hazel eyes peered up, and then down at you as he sat up and wiped his face with his sleeve. your eyes flicked down to the tent in his pants, adorned by a dark wet spot right where his tip would be, and you blinked slowly before looking back up.
he handed you your pen from the table and said, "smoke more and take a nap. i gotta get some shit done but we're not finished here."
you sighed and obeyed, taking a hit to appease him before he walked away. you pulled a blanket over you, not bothering to put pants back on before curling up and dozing off. ted checked back in on you after cleaning up the mess he made in his pants, and, finding you sleeping peacefully, he got a few chores done around the apartment. he wanted to be sure you were really sleeping so your reaction to him taking you forcefully would be all the more adorable. the groggy expression on your face as you pleaded for him to stop, the futile struggle you would put up as he held you down- it was all going to make tonight worth the weeks he had to put up with between your visits.
it was late afternoon when you came to. orange light filtered through the blinds, and you were suddenly very cold. you turned your head to look at what was happening and found ted kneeling between your legs on the couch, pumping his cock in his hand before shoving your legs open wider. you were stupid from the weed; your eyes only widened a little bit when you realized what was happening.
"no! nonononono! ted! please, please don't," you stuttered, brain trying to keep up with the situation.
he simply grinned and hooked your legs over his shoulders, lining himself up with you and waiting for just a moment before he said, "'anything i want,' baby. you said. this is your fault." with that, he buried himself deep into you, savoring every second and gently pumping his hips.
after a minute, he started thrusting harder, chuckling breathlessly when you resumed begging him to stop. of course, he knew you'd use the safe word if you really needed him to stop. it was so like you to put on a show for him, you really were such a performative slut. or maybe you really didn't remember.
"god, baby, you're so weak under me! hate to think of what else i could do to ya without you bein' able to stop me," he growled, still grinning. "taste these, huh, baby?" he shoved his fingers in your mouth, pressing them onto your tongue and watching as tears filled your eyes yet again, and he relished in how pathetic you looked as he ruined you.
when you started gagging on his digits, he pulled them out and wrapped his hand around your neck, squeezing lightly. "my pretty baby takes me sooo well, even when she doesn't want to," he continued, now pounding into you. all you could do was cry.
"y'know," he started with a laugh. "i really didn't think you'd be stupid enough to eat that whole gummy!" the sound of him smacking into you persisted as you slowly worked through what he said.
"wha?" you slurred, cockdrunk and higher than you had ever been.
"you just believed me so easily! one fourth-" he slammed deep into you, "- of that thing is what we usually have, but you just ate it all because i told you to." he leered down at you, continuing, "so trusting. so stupid. what if i wanted to hurt you, love? what if i used you until you were worthless and then kept going?"
you just sobbed. "and then i told you to smoke more, and you did! you stupid little slut! i bet you've never been this high, huh?" he was right in a way he couldn't imagine. you were floating, every inch of your skin tingling, and your core ached from overstimulation. you didn't think there was such a thing as too many orgasms, but here you were. your thoughts were a mess, the only thing in your mind was the name you were screaming: "teddy!!" over and over and over as you bawled, pounding your fist at his chest in a feeble attempt to stop him. but he persisted, railing you at an inhumane speed and reaching unexplored depths.
your only indication he was close was him gripping your throat far too tight, and you frantically grasped at his fingers while he jackhammered into you several final times before burying his shaft as far as it could go and cumming in you with a low, "fuuuck..."
the two of you kept your eyes locked until he caught his breath and removed his hand from your now slightly bruised throat. the sight snapped him out of his brutish state as he began to panic, kissing your neck softly and cooing about how sorry he was.
you just smiled and let your eyes fall closed, trusting him to take care of you after he had abused you so filthily.
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pookalicious-hq · 2 days
Text
a( )way... miya atsumu x reader
synopsis: childhood friends to lovers, unfortunately for both, she got away. how will meeting again after years turn out? tags: timeskip!haikyuu , swearing , kagehina mentioned , chappell roan coded word count: 1400~
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now playing: subway by chappell roan
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Miya Atsumu had never been one to turn down a night out; it had been that way since high school, since her. Drinking, laughing, keeping it light—that’s how he buried her. Little pieces of her, like shards of glass, were scattered throughout his life, hidden in plain sight. The matching keychain still hanging from his lanyard, the specific shade of pink he’d vowed to avoid, that damn perfume that would stop him in his tracks every time. She was everywhere and nowhere all at once, haunting him whenever he let his guard down.
Not tonight.
Tonight was supposed to be different—a team excursion, a break for everyone (minus Sakusa Kiyoomi). Saturday night promised the usual: a whirlwind of faces, fleeting conversations, all destined to blur into the comfortable haze of intoxicated laughter.
Walking down the bustling street, Bokuto’s boisterous laughter rang out like a bell, drawing smiles from passersby, while Hinata animatedly told some ridiculous story, his hands flailing wildly in the air. The infectious energy of the group wrapped around Atsumu like a blanket, momentarily drawing a smile to his face despite the shadows lurking in the back of his mind. The crisp night air carried the mingling scents of fried food and sweet drinks, along with the distant strains of live music drifting from nearby bars.
Atsumu glanced at Sakusa, standing slightly apart, arms crossed, his face set in its usual frown, though a tiny smirk tugged at his lips as Bokuto’s antics caught his eye. The neon lights spilled onto the sidewalk, casting their playful glow over the group, a bubble of carefree camaraderie that momentarily pushed away everything else.
Breathe. Just breathe it in.
He exhaled slowly, letting the warmth of the moment settle over him. For tonight, at least, he could forget.
They passed a group of girls laughing as they stumbled out of a bar, their giggles cutting through the clamor of the street, and then—there it was. That perfume. Sweet and familiar, it hit him with the force of a punch, yanking him backward into memories that were both warm and stinging. His heart stuttered, the flash of pink, the sound of her laughter ringing in his ears. Damn it, not tonight.
“Tsumu!” Hinata’s excited voice broke through the haze, pulling him back to the present. The ginger practically vibrated with excitement, his words barely keeping up with his energy. “Holy shit—you’re not gonna believe this! One of my favorite artists is playing at this bar tonight—Foxglove! You guys have to hear her. She’s amazing!”
Atsumu’s mind lingered on that scent, still clinging to his thoughts like smoke. He barely registered Hinata’s words, his muscles coiling with a tension that only alcohol could loosen. He needed a shot—no, two—before he could handle the whirlwind of Hinata’s enthusiasm.
“Will do,” Atsumu sighed, his voice thick with the need to get drunk fast. “As long as she’s hot.”
The others leaned into Hinata’s excitement, their eyes lighting up as he fumbled with his phone to pull up details about the bar. Bokuto, wide-eyed and always game for adventure, clapped Atsumu on the back with enough force to make him stumble forward, drawing a rough cough from his lungs.
“Come on, man! Live music and drinks? This is gonna be a night to remember!”
Atsumu barely responded, forcing a grin as he soothed his throat. He was here for the distraction, nothing more.
The bar came into view, small and cozy, its exterior draped in twinkling fairy lights. Inside, the golden glow of warm lights washed over the faces of the crowd gathered around the stage, casting everything in a soft, intimate hue. The worn wooden tables and mismatched chairs gave the place a charm that felt comforting, like it was meant for moments to linger.
Hinata led the way, bubbling with enthusiasm as they slid into a booth near the back. Atsumu’s mind drifted, his thoughts slipping back into dangerous territory—her. The scent, the color, the memories that had refused to die.
“So,” Atsumu muttered, his drink already half gone, “who’s this Foxglove chick?”
Hinata grinned wide, clearly thrilled. “She’s great! Tobio—” of course, he couldn’t go five minutes without bringing up Kageyama—“introduced me to her music. Says some of the songs remind him of us.”
“Sounds like he’s projecting,” Atsumu teased, rolling his eyes. Still, a flicker of curiosity sparked within him. Maybe this singer would be the hookup of the night—there was always a chance.
As the others debated some other artist, Atsumu’s attention drifted again. He slipped into autopilot, flicking his card to send a cosmopolitan over to the girl beside him, her drink shimmering under the dim lights. It was all muscle memory now—the routine perfected over years of distraction.
Then the music started.
He hadn’t been paying attention at first, but the moment she began to sing, something inside him stilled.
“Tonight’s first song is a new one,” the performer announced, her voice clear and unwavering. “It’s about him, about her, and the loved ones we couldn’t grasp in time.”
The crowd cheered, jolting Atsumu from his daze. He blinked, the drink in his hand suddenly feeling heavy. He wasn’t sure why, but the weight in his chest began to grow, tightening with every passing second.
And then, he saw her.
She stood under the soft lights, her long, dark hair cascading over her shoulders in waves. Gone was the short, frizzy mess he remembered; now, she looked ethereal, almost otherworldly in the soft rose-pink of her shirt. But her eyes—those eyes—hadn’t changed. They still held the same depth, the same pull that had always drawn him in. The sight of her hit him like a freight train, knocking the air from his lungs.
“I saw your blond hair, beauty mark next to your mouth— There on the subway, I nearly had a breakdown.”
His breath caught. It was her. There was no mistaking it.
(Y/n) was right here.
Her eyes, once bright with youthful mischief, now held a depth of emotion that seemed to reach into his chest and twist his heart. It was her, yet it wasn’t. She had changed, grown into something even more captivating than he could have imagined.
The familiar worn-down scar near her eyebrow still drew him in, a reminder of the countless moments they had shared, the touch of familiarity in this unfamiliar version of her.
As the song unfolded, time seemed to slow. Every note felt like a lifetime, stretching out endlessly. It was as if the world had narrowed to just the two of them, the crowded bar and his teammates fading into insignificance. He watched her lips move, the lyrics pouring out in perfect sync with the emotions she laid bare.
Each line hit him harder than the last. This wasn’t just a performance. It was raw, a confession wrapped in melody. An echo of things left unsaid between them, of memories they hadn’t been able to grasp.
“She’s got a way”
She wasn’t just another face from his past. She was a memory, the love he had never truly let go of. Every word she sang brought back moments he thought he had buried—moments of laughter, arguments, silences that had stretched on for too long.
“He’s got a way”
Her voice wove through the air, full of heartbreak and longing, pulling him deeper into the undertow of shared history. The way she sang with such vulnerability, as if she was baring her soul to the room, made him realize how much he had missed her. How much he still wanted her.
“She got away”
It wasn’t just about her being here, on this stage. It was about everything she represented—regret, longing, the love that slipped through his fingers. In this moment, it all came rushing back with such force that he felt like he was drowning in it.
“He got away”
Time stood still. The song stretched on, but it could’ve been seconds or hours—he couldn’t tell. His mind was trapped somewhere between past and present, everything blurring into the sound of her voice.
Then, as the final notes lingered in the air, it hit him: she had gotten away.
But now, maybe not.
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a/n: lmk if you guys want a mini series out of this, sorta just a little blurb i whipped up after listening to chappell roan on repeat... thanks for reading baes <333
don't vote if you dont want it <33
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taglist: @arusio , @neito327 , @kyoneko , @jino0ix , @soobinsbreadscrumbs , @dazqa , @ihatetakumi , @littlemissendlessdreamer , @blueeclipsepaperartstudent, @sugacor3
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evanescencelovrr · 2 days
Text
Part 8 college!simon x reader. Reader works her first shift at the bar and meets team 141 🙊 feel free to like comment & reblog!
Masterlist here ✉️
First shift. You muttered to yourself, buckling your black belt in your jeans. All black outfit, perfect for waitressing. Your hair was tucked in a bun to keep it neat, some strands fallen. Closing shut your mirror, you eyed your dorm room, taking off the lights before leaving with your bag.
“I wonder what that crew is like…apparently they must mean a lot to him.” You said, under your breath as you walked to the main street. The bar was located behind Campus apparently and took about 15 minutes to reach. It wasn’t horrible—you saw shitty motel buildings and broken neon lights along the way.
Cars passed by every now and then. Your mind drifted back to Simon. Maybe that was where he got those eyebags from—working all these night shifts.
The bell rings as you enter and of course, you hear an electric guitar strumming over the speakers. Glasses clink and the displays are showing a football match. You nervously approach the counter and soon a man comes in—mohawk, beard and sharp eyes. Tanned. Tall, muscular and a rag thrown over his shoulder.
What you didn’t expect what his strong scottish accent. “Aye, y’er ere’ fa’ the job, lass?”
“Yes—“ You furrowed your brows, slowly comprehending it to which he barked out a laugh. You weren’t sure you heard him right and the words just spilled out your mouth.
His shiny teeth glittered in the lights. “C’mon, love, no reason t’ be scared. Names Johnny.”
“Of course sir—“
“Johnny.” He said firmly, eyes cutting a glance at you as he began cleaning the glasses with his rag.
You nodded and bit your lip—first mistake. You then made your way behind the counter, boots thudding against the ground. You always wore your lil platform combat boots—added a nice touch.
“Lieutenants got a hold on’ ya?” Johnny said suddenly, eyeing you. Confused, you turn to look at him and you shake your heard, lips tugging down a bit.
“I wouldn’t—“
“Damned man. Cannae help it, you’re a pretty one.” Johnny smiled, rolling his eyes and grinning.
You stare mildly shocked at his carefree attitude, not knowing what exactly to say—or how Simon would respond to this.
After a pause, you then say, “Show me around, yeah?”
“Look at er’ givin’ me orders.” Johnny teased and then got to work, dropping his causal persona. He led you gently to the kitchen, showing you where to restock the fruits. Oranges went in one crate.
Apples in another.
Lemons to the side.
You nodded.
He then showed you how to clean the damn ice maker, which took a good portion of training. He even had you do it, watching you. A half hour at least passed.
“Y’er gettin’ it.” Johnny said, pleased. He patted your back hefty, and you nearly groaned at each pat. He was heavy handed.
You scoff a bit and smile, slowly getting comfortable. After that, was washing and soaking the glasses in lukewarm water to get stains out and debris. And then drying them. And then placing them on the hanging racks by the bar counter for use.
Just then, the door rung and Simon walked in, ready for his shift. When he rounded the counter and saw you, back facing him and drying a glass, he froze momentarily. He then slid his hands into the dark wash of his jeans, black button up wrinkling.
“See ya’ made it in one piece.” A gruff voice said from behind you. You recognized it.
You turned around and grinned, brow raising slightly at his appearance. He sure cleaned up nicely, although his stubble remained rough, hair uncombed. It looked like he ran his fingers through it multiple times.
“Johnny over there s’been keeping me alive. Does he always have a knack for teasin’?”
“Shit, shoulda mentioned that to ya. Don’ let em’ talk his way in y’er panties.” Simon said gruffly, although eyes flashing in amusement. His heavy lidded eyes raised and you found yourself staring a bit longer than necessary, and then turned around. Carefully rearranging the glasses so they stood upside down—the wet ones draining.
“Would be funny all he found were a pair of balls. Steel ones.”
With that, Simon let out a small laugh. A choked out chuckle, shoulders jerking up and grin stretching wide. The curve of his nose wrinkled, eyes flashing down to undo his cuffs to raise his sleeves over his hair forearms.
“Steel ones you said? Quite the image.” And with that, leaving you dazed and flustered, he went off to the kitchen.
——
As Simon approached the kitchen to begin slicing the oranges, and lemons, Johnny appeared.
“Ya’ got a lass under ya now?”
���Shut it, before I stuff Price’s unwashed sock in y’er mouth.” Simon is at it, gruff and glaring. Brows pinched together, big hands cradling the lemon. He tosses it up, then catches it, giving a sharp glance to Johnny who grins mischievously.
“I ain’t signin’ myself up fa’ tha’.” Johnny winced playfully and moved back, to which Simon found it pleasing. Even at work, he was still regarded as Lieutenant—which should still be. Regardless of being at base or not. His position would remain.
He then glanced at you, who leaned against the counter and spoke to a customer. Your grin, although some strands fell delicately, most was tucked away neatly. You shook the drink, mixing and poured it over.
You seemed to be adjusting pretty well.
‘’Aye, lass, come work the back, yea?’’ Johnny called out, from the kitchen. You moved swiftly on your feet, after given the man his drink to which he dropped tips on the counter.
‘’Ya forgot—‘’ Simon started when you breezed past him, sighing through his nose. He walked up, cleaning his scarred hands with the rag, and then slid the tips over.
‘’For that girl.’’ said the man, drinking his mojito and eyeing Simon. He didn’t like this fella. Something itched at him. Maybe it was the sly twinkle in the mans eye, the slight lift of his lip. Bushy eyebrows peeked out.
“Didn’t need ta’ explain yourself.” Simon muttered, stuffing the tips in his pockets, although in his left, making sure to keep his tips separate from yours. Seems you still had some learning to do.
The man returned to his drink, although occasionally eyeing Simons back who now worked the front of the bar. He used the calculator to punch in numbers. Just then, a crowd of people came in—as usual. Night settled now and chatter arose in the bar.
Barstools shook as people sat, slamming hands and cheering. Simon approached and leaned his hands on the edge, eyeing them. “What ave’ we got?”
“Whiskey, neat.”
“Same here.”
“Gimme a scotch, good man.”
Behind, you worked cutting the oranges skin off. Stealthy hands worked and even Johnny let out a whistle. “Things ya’ canna do with those hands.”
You found your breath catching and you shifted on your boots, leaned over the table. You pinched your brows. “You woke up cheery today.”
Johnny laughed and sautéed the vegetables, steam rising. A crackle sound rung in the air, then hissing as he mixed in steak. About halfway, he flipped it expertly. “Jus’ focus on makin’ them hands work, yea?”
“You got it, Johnny.” You quirked, releasing some of your rigidity. He grinned, eyeing you for a second appreciating your tenacity. Slowly, you were getting used to this work environment. It appeared to be smooth, occasionally filled with teasing and banter. Maybe this wasn’t so bad—you thought.
Simon didn’t like as soon as you arrived—new recruit—you’d gotten stares. What he didn’t like were the usual assholes that crept up here every night. He figured he should give you a heads up, although maybe you knew. He wasn’t sure.
And he also wouldn’t lie, you were a pretty thing. He stilled himself once he realized his train of thought, then went back to shaking the drink harder. Almost as if threatening the damn drink. Brows pinched in semi focus— and a hint of irritation at himself. He then removed the shaker and poured smoothly the drink into the glass, pushing it towards the rugged man.
Just then, he spotted Price who arrived. He took his jacket off, resting it on the hook in the small closet next to yours. The man didn’t take long to realize what had changed. ‘’We got a new one?’’
“Aye, shes in the back.” Simon responded, voice lowered.
“She?”
“Got a problem?”
“Nah, just thought you’d bring in a little lad, is all.” Price grinned widely, small eyes crinkling. His mustache brushed his lips.
Price earned a look from Simon. His usual stoic, and cold demeanor not wavering. As Simon leaned against the soda machine, he then perked up when a woman approached the bar, lipstick smudged and hair a wavy mess. Price took this to his advantage and moved to the back.
“Gimme—“
“Gimme a…Malibu mixed with pineapple and cranberry.” She mumbled, grasping the counter and smiling at Simon.
Price then saw you, peeling away at the oranges skillfully. Beside you were a whole basket—unpeeled. And another—ready to go. Price grabbed his apron and tied it round’ his waist, chin tilted down, eyes not leaving you. “Recruit, see ya’ made it to the team.”
You jumped as you were stuck in focus and the man smiled, one corner lifting up. He looked like a millennial dad, you thought. Shifting on your boots, you watched as deft fingers made a skill-full knot behind his back and then he moved to the table beside you.
He grasped at the large knife, as it shined in the overhead light.
“Names y/n.” You said, Johnny taking a long glance over at the scene as Price began slicing smoothly at the chicken.
“You up for waiting tables?” Price said gruffly.
“You got it, sir.”
And at that, Price gave you a smug smile, eyes flashing over you. Johnny then prepared a plate, handing it to you. His tall form towered over you for a moment before going back to prepare another round.
“That ones’ fa’ table five, love.” Johnny said and your eyes peeked up at the nickname. Honestly it seemed casual for him—maybe there was no meaning behind it.
Nodding, you grasped the plate and then caught eyes with Price. He was busy slicing the flesh clean.
Wasn’t so bad for my first shift, you thought.
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hajimesh · 2 days
Text
ִֶָ 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ ‐skyfall. suguru geto
part two. sunset (him)
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⥅word c. 2,656
⥅warnings. suguru's pov, heavy angst, main character death, mentions of drinking and smoking, depressed suguru, hurt/comfort (?)
𝄢♭turning page ‐ sleeping at last / let her go ‐ passenger
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Suguru will never forget the morning you came back to him. He distinctly remembers it was right after a slow night at the bar, the air felt chiller than usual, and the streets were too quiet. He couldn’t wait to get home, already dreaming of his bed and the leftover pizza from two nights ago.
But the sleep vanished as soon as he saw you sitting by the window.
At first, he thought someone had broken into his place until he realized it was you, which scared him even more than the thought of a thief. As soon as he heard your voice, it was as if he felt everything and nothing all at once—it also made him realize he had started to forget the sound of it without noticing.
It was the sight of your cheeky smile, the little wave as you teased him like you used to, that got him out of his stupor. Suddenly, he was on a high, something he hadn’t felt in months.
Gone was the tiredness from working all night as he ran up the stairs to the apartment while his heart beat wildly against his rib cage. However, nothing could’ve prepared him for the sight that awaited him: sitting by the window, the curtains blew behind you as the sky shone with pinks and lilacs, clouds that looked like cotton floating in it. But even such beautiful scenery couldn’t compare to the sight of you, your beauty or the gentle smile on your face.
“Fuck, I missed you,” he felt his soul come back to his body as soon as he had you in his arms. The feel of your fingers carding through his hair immediately relaxed him, your voice soothing the dull pain that had settled deep in his heart.
He feared his heart would not make it through that morning, your presence and laugh — god, how he had missed your laugh — more than enough of a threat to his battered heart. 
That morning, Suguru Geto came back to life after living like a zombie for three months without you, the pain pushed to the back of his mind as he only focused on loving you.
He often wondered if he should quit his job, it messed up with his sleeping schedule and mood. But that bar was where he first met you, he still remembered how you walked up to him to order a round of drinks for your friends, and by the end of the night you had left right after saving your number in his phone.
Somehow, it felt wrong to leave a place that held such beautiful memories.
“You’ll be late for work,” he heard you say, light kisses covering his face as they traveled from his lips to his jaw before focusing on his cheeks.
He could tell it was dark outside, which meant that yes, he was most definitely running late. But he was a prisoner of your kisses, he would be out of his mind to push you away.
“Shower with me.”
Suguru was enraptured the whole time, watching the water dripping down your body as you sang each song that played from the speaker you had in the bathroom. The only thing that could stop you were his lips, kissing you nonstop until he had to physically hold you so you wouldn't fall to your knees. 
At that moment, he felt like he fell in love with you all over again.
He really didn't want to leave, but if you were there with him, then it meant that everything was back to normal. It made sense, right?
“See you at sunrise!”
And when he saw you by the window the next day, and the day after that, suddenly he was looking forward to each morning, hoping to see you sitting by the window where you belonged. 
The world could end tomorrow, and he wouldn’t care. As long as he had you by his side, nothing could ruin his happiness.
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The rush hour was at its peak, college kids flooding the small bar on a Friday night—finals were over, so Suguru kind of expected it. After all, it was something he used to do just a few years ago.
He worked as fast as he could, lining up the shot glasses and filling them with liquor so Satoru could take them to the right table. It had become part of their routine, both men realizing that they worked well together after two days of being on the same shift.
Satoru placed his elbows on the counter and leaned forward, squinted eyes staring suspiciously at Suguru.
“You seem… livelier,” he paused, “chirpier?”
Shrugging, Suguru continued pouring drinks, “why wouldn’t I be?”
Still looking at him weirdly, Satoru dropped the subject once the raven-haired handed him another round of drinks, turning on his heel and continuing to work—he could always ask him later.
Meanwhile, Suguru’s mind strayed to your conversation from earlier that day. It had been two weeks since you were back, and it was impossible to get you out of his mind. Before he could stop it, he was smiling at the memory, his heart fluttered at the thought of spending all of your weekends cuddling and watching movies. He hoped that one day, a little version of you both could join the tradition.
At that point, he couldn’t hide his smile.
With a push of his hips, Satoru tried to snap him out of his daydream, signaling with his head to the girl that stood in front of him. 
Suguru stared at her, she seemed familiar, but it wasn’t until she reminded him of her name that he remembered who she was: an old classmate from high school. They had dated briefly during their senior year before he met you.
“I haven't seen you since we graduated,” she smiled at him, “I never thought I would find you here of all places!”
The atmosphere felt awkward, it was as if an elephant sat in the room and everyone could see it but him. He didn’t like that feeling one bit.
“Yeah, I work here.”
The girl hummed and shot Satoru a polite smile, her long nails tapping loudly against the granite.
“I-I was actually wondering if,” she paused, looking bashful as she switched her weight from one heel to the other, “we could go for a cup of coffee one of these days? You know, like, to catch up?”  
Suguru instantly tensed up, “catch up?”
“Yeah! Uhm… like a date?”
He never liked it when people put him on the spot, both Satoru’s and the girl’s eyes set on him as they waited for his answer.
“Sorry, but I have a girlfriend,” he offered her an awkward smile.
Satoru sighed dramatically, wrapping an arm around Suguru’s shoulders and pulling him against his side.
“I don't think she’ll mind,” he winked at Suguru before turning to look at the confused girl, “he’d love to go on a date with you!”
Pushing him away, Suguru looked at him in disgust, “are you out of your mind?”
Both men were too busy staring at the other down to hear the girl excuse herself and leave.
Satoru scoffed, “I should be the one asking you that.”
“The fuck you mean by that!?” Suguru was fuming by now, attracting the interest of a few patrons that happened to witness everything.
“Hey, hey!” a third voice intervened, Nanami placing himself between them, “you two need to calm down.”
Suguru ignored the recently hired waiter, continuing to stare down at his best friend. There was no way he was going to stand there and let him treat you like that. 
“I asked you a question: what the hell was that!?”
“Sorry for trying to get you a date with a cute girl,” Satoru said sarcastically, “one date won’t hurt, and you know it.”
Fed up with his words, Suguru pushed Nanami to the side and stepped closer to whom he had to call his best and closest friend. He had had enough of Satoru’s shit. 
“Disrespect my girl again, and I'll forget you’re like a brother to me.”
With a sneer, Satoru reciprocated the look.
“Suit yourself.”
They barely talked again for the rest of the night.
Suguru could feel a migraine coming, the faint palpitations at the back of his head increasing as the minutes passed. All he wanted was his shift to be over, so he could go back to your arms.
He took the trash outside, staying there a few minutes as he leaned against the wall. His lips wrapped around the cigarette as he took a long drag, and unconsciously began to smile once he noticed the sky starting to lighten. 
The sound of the door opening and closing took him out of his daydream.
“Spill,” Satoru stood before him, arms folded in front of his chest with a serious look that Suguru hadn’t seen in weeks, “what’s up with you.”
“I have nothing to say to you.”
“Don’t you dare push me away again,” the white-haired jabbed a finger on his chest, “you were finally recovering, and what? You’re letting her control your life again?”
“I would watch my mouth if I were you,” Suguru warned him, his features hardening again, “and she isn’t controlling anything.”
Groaning, Satoru ran a hand down his face, “when are you going to get it through your thick skull?!” 
“Get what!?”
After stepping on the cigarette, Suguru started making his way inside, getting tired of Satoru’s complaints. Only to stop abruptly once he heard him speak again, his blood turning cold. 
“That your girlfriend is dead.”
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Suguru never believed in those weird conspiracy theories that Satoru liked to feed him, and even years later, he still managed to come up with the craziest stories.
He believed there's a rational explanation for everything, not entirely a man of science, but if you could prove what you said, then he had no reason to doubt.
Every rational thought told him it couldn’t be possible, and yet there you were, holding his face between your hands as he heard your voice, and smelled your perfume. 
You were supposed to be gone.
He had to hold back from breaking down as soon as he got home, your silhouette standing by the window as if you truly were there, waiting for him like you always used to. He couldn't bear to see you smile, to hear you talk about a future when you no longer had one. He could barely keep it together when you cupped his face in your hands and made him stare at you, something seemed to have switched in your eyes, and he didn’t like it one bit.
“It’s time to let go, Suguru.”
“I can't,” he whispered in a broken voice, “I don't want to.”
Three months without seeing you, feeling you, there was no way he’d let you slip away from his grasp—not again.
Tears ran down his cheeks, his heart pressing heavily against his chest as he fought the need to crumble down to the floor. He could see your eyes glistening with tears, but your pretty smile remained, giving him all the time he needed to compose himself. 
“I'm so sorry.”
“It wasn't your fault,” you whispered, rubbing your thumbs against his cheekbones, trying and failing to stop the tears, “I could never blame you, I never did.”
Unwanted memories from that day swarmed his mind: the loud screech of tires against the pavement, your body next to his, the sight of your beautiful face covered in cuts and bruises mocking the peaceful look in it. The memory haunted him for months.
What was once the face of an angel, as he liked to call you, twisted into a gruesome memory.
If only he hadn’t convinced you to accompany him to the party, or if he had paid more attention to the road so he could’ve avoided the drunk driver that hit the car as he drove home. You’d still be there, with him, holding him just as you were doing right at that moment.
“I'm going insane,” he sniffled, resting his forehead against yours, “aren’t I?”
“No, no, you’re not. But you aren’t taking care of yourself,” you kept smiling through your tears, your voice gentle as if you were talking to a child, “you either sleep too little or too much, and you haven’t been attending your lectures.”
Rocking you side to side, he dismissed your comment with a nonchalant hum, “but I’m happy now, isn’t that what you want? Just… stay? Please?”
The lack of words on your part was his answer.
“Will I see you again?” 
“Of course,” your smile broadened, “even if the skies fall, or a huge wave takes over the city, you’ll never get rid of me.”
Suguru’s hold tightened, your face hiding in his chest as you both tried to calm yourselves down. He didn’t dare to close his eyes, wanting to see your face for as long as he could. And even with tears clogging up your eyelashes and wobbly lips, you were still as gorgeous as he remembered.
“You’re my sunrise, and I'm your sunset,” he whispered in your ear, “never forget that.”
Not like you could. You had found your very own sunset, only yours to love and admire.
“I would never.”
Even with puffy eyes and tears wetting your cheeks, Suguru still thought you were the most beautiful woman that ever walked the earth. He helped you wipe your tears, watching you sniffle and laugh right after.
“Baby?” you spoke after a few minutes of silence and holding each other, basking in his warmth until it made you sleepy. 
His lips kissed the crown of your hair while his fingers combed it away from your face, admiring your face with love brimming from his eyes, “hm?”
A lump blocked your throat, tears welling up in your eyes before quickly cascading down your cheeks as you ingrained his face into your memory.     
“Look for me in the sky, I promise I'll be there.”
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Suguru never saw you again after that day.
It was as if the grief took over his life all over again, the sorrow suffocating him with each breath he took. His body and soul crumpled even lower than the first time, however, with each passing week, the heaviness in his heart became lighter.
It took him a while to open up to Satoru, and when he finally did, the tears were unstoppable from both sides. Satoru felt for his friend and you, you two had had a close bond too after all, and after seeing Suguru shattered after your loss, he knew he had to be his rock.
There wasn’t a place in the city that didn’t have your name, filled with memories of your dates as Suguru and you explored the world together. But it was time to turn the page, with your memory inked on the corner of it and in Suguru’s soul.
He would never be able to forget you, and he didn’t want to.
Sitting by the window, Suguru took a look at the late spring afternoon. Living in a world without you would always be painful, which is why he found himself staring at it from your eyes. That window was your spot; he would always find you there before the sun was up, and right before it disappeared behind the horizon, waving him goodbye as he drove away to work.
The usual bustle of the streets quieted down for a moment, it was as if the world went still. Orange tinted the sky as usual, only this time, hues of blue and lilac blended across it, the wind cold and refreshing as it blew against his warm skin.
Suguru peered up at the skies with a nostalgic smile, a wave of peacefulness making its way into his heart.
“There you are, my love.”
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yuuuhiii · 20 hours
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yandere themes, knife usage, mdni
a/n: I need to stop watching Dexter (*´ー`*)
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He loved you so so much. His beautiful bestfriend. You were to good for people, definitely to good for this world. In his eyes, no one was ever perfect for your time.
Nobody deserved it.
Not even him.
But he’d tell himself he was an exception since he was your bestfriend.
You were always nice and gentle to everyone that had the luck of talking to you.
But he hated.
Really hated.
When some morons could think they could have even a chance to be with you. Couldn’t they see that was his spot?
He adored the way you’d reject them, he’d like for you to be more mean but you could never do no wrong. And for the people that could ever mistreat you.
He dealt with them himself.
In the dark of the night, letting you know he’d go get you both snacks and you nodded, a kiss to his warming cheek. He feels the remnants of your lips still on his skin, even when he’s on his way to someone’s house.
It was a guy, someone who thought he could touch what was his. He stops at the end of the street, the guy walking into view.
He knows his routine, where he lives, his name and the best part, how to get in. So before the guy can even make it to his house. He’s settling in, the lights are off and a shot of adrenaline shoots through him when he hears the door unlock.
The guy walks in, unbeknownst of his presence on the couch until he turns the light on. He gasps loudly, almost tripping over his kitchen chair. He turns around from his place on the couch.
“Remember me?” He grins, standing up.
“W-What—Get the fuck out of my house!” The guy yells.
He snickers. “I asked if you remembered me.” He walks over to him. He towers over the guy, a psychotic glint in his eyes it has the guy gulping.
“N-No.” He pouts, placing a hand on his shoulder.
“Let’s try to remember okay? You saw the most beautiful girl today? You had your hands all over her, making her uncomfortable right?”
The guy nods his head. “I-I didn’t know she had a boyfriend.” He laughs, squeezing the guys shoulder.
“It’s nothing like that. I’m just her bestfriend, I gotta protect her from guys like you.”
He forces the guy to sit down on his own chair. He walks over to the kitchen counter, grabbing a knife. The guy squeaks, shivering in his chair.
“She was really scared you know? It hurt me to see her like that. I never wanna see her scared. It also makes me upset because I feel like I’m not doing my job correctly. So that’s why I’m here. To finish it.” He pokes at the end of the knife.
“Y-You’re fucking crazy!”
The guy takes off in a sprint for the front door. Making your bestfriend sigh. He goes after him and the poor guy isn’t even able to open the door before he’s dragging him back from the collar of his shirt.
“Gosh you don’t have to make this hard you know.” He rubs at his forehead.
“I swear! I didn’t mean to make her uncomfortable! She’s just really pretty—” He nodded along as the guy rambled on, dragging the knife along the guys chest.
“I’ve heard this so many times. Why do you guys always try to justify your actions in the end.” He sucks at his teeth.
“You guys always end up the same either ways. Dead.”
The guys plea’s are white noise in his mind as he plunges the knife in him. It’s always in these moments he feels like something takes over and when he snaps out of it, the work is already done.
He spends some time cleaning up the body. His hands his clothes. Making it look like a murder scene. He curses at himself when he sees the missed calls from you. He dials your number and your pretty voice engulfs his ears.
“Hey, where’ve you been.” He could hear your pout across the line making him smile as he makes his way to his car.
“A lot of the convenience stores are closed so I had to go to one far from your house.” He lies through his teeth.
“Oh ok then.” You murmur and he smiles.
“I’ll be right there ok pretty?” You hum and he hangs up.
When he’s finally back with bags of snacks, you cheer.
“Finally! I missed you.” You say as you throw your arms around his neck. You go to kiss his cheek but spot something.
“Hey what is this?” You swipe your thumb over his cheek, it’s a red stain.
“Huh?” He peers down at your thumb and places the bags on the floor. He laughs and you glance at him confused.
“I might’ve had a little snack without you, it’s ketchup.” You whine and push at his chest but he picks you up, letting you squeal as he places you on your bed.
“It’s fine, I got you all your favorites ok.” He leans in, his breath fanning your lips. It makes you gasp and your eyes lid. He pecks the corner of your mouth, getting off of you and grabbing the bags.
You’re left there on your bed a flushing mess as he hums, sorting out the snacks. You chew at your lip and sit next to him.
“Hey I have a question.” He hums, still taking things out.
“H—How come you don’t kiss me?” He faces you but you’re messing with your hands.
“You’re always calling me names and treating me like your girlfriend. You even scare away guys when they come up to me. But we’re still best friends?” He hates how confused you look.
“C’mere.” He pats his lap and you move to straddle him.
“You want me to kiss you?” He tilts his head and you nod.
His lips are on yours and they’re wasting no time. They’re feverish around yours and if the tv wasn’t on you would’ve payed attention to how loud your guys lips smacked against each others. When he inserts his tongue into your mouth you let out a moan, tugging at his hair. He smiles and pulls away.
“You’ve been waiting for this huh?” You nod quickly.
“I was beginning to think you didn’t feel the same way.” You rest your face on his shoulder. He places kisses on your cheek and down to your neck.
“Oh baby, if only you knew how far I’d go for you.”
YUTA OKKOTSU, KAZUTORA HANEMIYA, HARUCHIYO SANZU, Armin Arlert, Vigilante Deku, Hirofumi Yoshida,
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© yuuuhiii 24 : don’t plagiarize, translate, or post my work on other platforms
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Text
You’re too sweet for me— Kai Anderson x reader
tell a friend to tell a friend…
Pt. 1, Pt. 2
warnings: masturbation, stalking
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For days, you didn’t text.
He was going absolutely wild. He scoured the internet, every Instagram post of everyone you knew, everything with your name or face from the past week.
Where were you? What were you doing? Were you ever going to text?
He tried to push you from his mind, tried to block out his obsession with you. He said he wouldn’t go out to find you, not in person. It was too risky.
But he couldn’t help it. He was truly obsessed.
He had resolved himself to believing you’d forgotten him. It was for the better, anyway. He was too dangerous for you. You were too soft for him.
If he was never going to speak to you again, though, then could it hurt to keep tabs on you? Who was keeping you safe if not him?
You sat by your window, reading a book, wearing silky shorts and a tank top, fuzzy socks and headphones over your ears, your shoulder leaned against your window.
He sat in his car, popped an adderall and stared. You were truly ethereal.
You tossed your book past your feet, then looked out the window. You shuffled, glanced at your phone, then stood up, staring at it, walking back and forth across your floor, your nails in your teeth.
What had you so worried? he wondered. Were you waiting on a text from a boy in class? Were you picking out a dress for your night out? Were you-
Ding.
His phone buzzed in his pocket just as you threw yours down and sat back at your window.
No way.
(Y/N)
Hey, knight in shining armor. Is a weekend with no plans danger enough for you to come to the rescue?
Were you worried about texting him?
He couldn’t answer you right away. He would wait a few minutes. Not too long, but enough that you knew he was a busy man.
After five minutes, you began to bite your nails. After ten, you paced again. You couldn’t be worried about him, were you? No. Impossible.
He texted you back after eighteen minutes.
Kai
Coffee. 3. House by the woods. I’ll pick you up.
You looked at your phone light up, your smile so wide he could see it from his car, and jumped.
You jumped.
(Y/N)
Can’t wait.
Kai
See you tomorrow, princess.
He prayed that you understood his referencing to your little charade.
(Y/N)
Princess. I like that.
I bet you do, he thought.
(Y/N)
Is that a weird thing to say?
Sweet, sweet girl.
Kai
Not at all.
He watched as your hand played with the hem of your sleep shorts. Oh, how he wished you’d take it off right in front of your window. He watched as your hand slid down your shorts.
No fucking way.
He stared in awe as you worked yourself in plain sight of the street. You really were so careless.
(Y/N)
Phew.
Kai
See you, princess.
You threw your head back, smiling.
You were touching yourself for him. His dick was on fire.
(Y/N)
Can’t wait for tomorrow!
You began messily playing with yourself, arm moving faster as you stared at the screen. Dirty little girl.
He needed to show you how to be bad. He needed to taint you.
Kai
See you then.
(Y/N)
<3
That was the last text you sent before you placed the phone down. You worked your hand against yourself, your other hand reaching up to your chest, playing with your nipples through your shirt fabric.
He pulled out his dick, rolling his window up halfway, still able to see you clearly, but making sure the car was dark.
He began to work himself, watching your little hands play with your sensitive body. He just knew he could get you so wet so quickly.
You continued play with yourself, biting the back of your hand, quieting your moans, Kai assumed.
He came quick, well before you did. He continued to watch, but it was much less unbearable for a few moments afterward.
He could tell you were coming when you started gripping the walls and rolling your body, biting your hand to silence yourself.
You sat still for a moment, chest heaving.
He stared for another dozen minutes or so before putting his car in gear. When he looked back up, you had turned off your light. 10:15pm. Good girl.
He drove away, a smirk playing at his lips the whole ride home.
long one coming tomorrow. few on the way. it’s that time of year
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luvvyouforever · 2 days
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headcanons : matt murdock x mutant/superpowered!reader
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content: fluff, some plot, smut at the very end.
a/n: i didn't mean to write this much, oops! i tried not to be very specific when describing powers, but it's a little hard not to! you can imagine anything you want to though!!! enjoy <3
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ꫂৎ the first time he meets you is entirely accidental. there's fighting, he hears it on patrol, and runs to it. just a few feet before turning the corner, he pauses because he smells, he feels something different in the air. it's not the usual smell of blood and concrete and sweat. it's electric, or perhaps sweet, or something else entirely that doesn't usually come from fighting.
ꫂৎ he comes closer and notices that one person is fighting off three people and winning. in his fiery, blurred vision, he can make out an unnatural force pushing people back that's coming out of someone's hands. a hero, a mutant, a vigilante like him.
ꫂৎ without thinking, he runs forward and takes down someone who was attempting to grab you from behind. shocked, you turn and almost knock him back with whatever your power is. when you see that he helped you, you whisper a thanks.
"you have powers," he says matter-of-factly.
you nod then flex your hands which shake from the after-effects of your power flowing through you. "thanks for uh...," you gesture to the unconscious body behind you.
"don't worry about it."
before you can edge in another word, he runs off, leaving you to stand awestruck in an alleyway.
ꫂৎ the next time you meet him, he's out of daredevil form and in his charming, red glasses, lawyer form. it's something so simple like a coffee shop meet-cute or bumping into each other on the street, but he recognizes you immediately. you, of course, have no idea who he is.
ꫂৎ it feels surreal to him to see you so normal when he knows that your veins flow with some kind of power that he's dying to learn more about. quite shamelessly, he flirts with you, invites you to get a drink with him, or get lunch together. he has to know more.
ꫂৎ you definitely start going on dates more often and he certainly makes it a point to "bump" into you quite regularly. as for his night time activities, he's always searching for that same feeling of electricity in the air that comes from you. however, he doesn't find it anymore and assumes that it was a one-time thing, that you don't frequently go out searching for trouble like him.
ꫂৎ if you're an x-man or avenger or a part of another some kind of group, i'd like to think that on one of these dates you're going on, you get a call requesting your immediate presence for a mission. you'd rather quickly stand up, knocking the table into his middle, apologize, and ask for another date later. of course, he heard the call and he'd be searching for you later, knowing you were off doing some dangerous task. he worried, but when you eventually went on another date, he could tell you were bruised and that one of your ribs seemed to be just a little out of place.
ꫂৎ matt eventually asks you to be his partner not necessarily because he wants to know more about your powers, but because he genuinely likes you a lot now. he's such a gentleman to you, drops flowers off at your apartment before he goes into the office, and offers to pay for your dinners when he's busy with "work" at night.
ꫂৎ i think you would figure out he's the daredevil before he knows the extent of your powers. i imagine that one night you stay the night in his apartment while he says he's stuck at work with foggy and karen, but then he comes stumbling in, half-conscious and in dire need of medical assistance.
matt's satin sheets envelop you in his bed as you wait late into the night for him to come home. he promised you that it was okay for you to spend the night and wait around for him rather than asking you to walk back late at night.
suddenly, you hear the door open, a coat rack fall, and a cup fall to the ground, shattering loudly. with panicked movements, you jump out of bed and enter the living room. matt fell to the couch, groaning and clutching his side. he was dressed in a dark black outfit with a bandana wrapped around his eyes and despite him looking attractive, you can't ignore his bleeding wounds and obvious agony.
"what the fuck, matt?" you whisper-yell. he tears off the bandana and his eyes meet yours with shock. he tries to turn away and deny your help, but the movement causes far too much pain in his side.
"first-aid kit," he manages to get out. "bathroom."
hurriedly, you grab the kit and come back. he's trying to peel his shirt away from his chest but he can't. his hands grope around for the scissors in the kit and when he finds them, he places them in your shaking palm.
"i'll walk you through it."
ꫂৎ after he's safe and patched up, you interrogate him about everything. his senses, his vigilante behaviors, his past, his inner-workings. he openly tells you anything you want to know. after a few beats of silence between you in which you help him into bed, he asks you a question about your powers.
ꫂৎ you hadn't even known that he was the one to save you that night and you had an even fainter idea that he knew about your powers. you asked the questions he had as well and offered to show him what all you could do. he sat up on the bed, looking vaguely in your direction, as you showed off the abilities you had that coarsed through your body. he was in awe and the familiar smell from so long ago invaded his nose again. after that, nothing was kept hidden from either of you.
ꫂৎ you're totally a crime-fighting badass duo. he's all strength and physicality and senses while you are mystical and powerful, though not as stealthy. you spar together regularly so matt can gain experience fighting against powers and you can improve your physical fighting skills.
ꫂৎ matt never doubts your abilities or strength. if anything, he's your biggest fan. he knows you can take on big bads and robbers alike, but he's too much of a gentleman to let you fight people on your own. he will, however, step in and take someone down if they're being disrespectful to you in any way.
ꫂৎ if you are a part of some hero group, he would be secretly so nervous to meet them for the first time. on the outside, he's his usual witty and charming self, but inside he's worried that they won't like him or accept it which will create complications in your relationship.
below are some more niche/specific headcanons for different powers that reader might have:
ꫂৎ super strength: is always a little shocked when you pick up something extremely heavy. once, you two were out roaming the city as heros/vigilantes and when you two needed a quick exit, there happened to be a large dumpster blocking the way. he quickly tried to pivot but stopped once he could tell the dumpster was now 40 feet down the alleyway.
ꫂৎ elemental: oh my goodness, loves when you show it off outside of an actual need to use it. like, for example, taking a warm bath together and shaping the water into little creatures or creating beautiful flower beds or just playing with it while laying in bed late at night.
ꫂৎ magic wielding: has the most questions about this one. wants to know the full extent of your powers and if you don't even know, he finds it that much cooler. if you imagine having powers that are easily corruptible, matt will always be there to bring you back to earth and remind you of the good things in life.
bonus! small nsfw headcanons mdni
ꫂৎ. is most certainly not above using each other's abilities on the other. he's constantly listening to your heart rate to tease you, to bring you just close enough to the edge, and then pull away. he can tell when you're feeling the best and just knows what you need that night based on his senses. it's a little unfair to say you can't use your ability on him.
ꫂৎ if anything, he likes it! a lot. he's the more dominant person in the bedroom, but he enjoys a fight for it and certainly doesn't mind needing to manage a stronger person when he's in the mood for it. push him down onto the bed and don't let him get up. use some magical manipulation to tie him down. speed around him while he's trying to pin you down. he lives for it.
ꫂৎ. if you have some kind of suit, he likes running his hands along the material, feeling your body underneath, and expertly imagining the shape in his head. he especially enjoys suits if they're the tight spandex that's been molded to your body. if you're not hurt, when you come back that night, the suit will be on the floor, or perhaps left on.
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narryffdreaming · 20 hours
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lia and harry's story (two)
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summary: harry is a bartender and lia lives right across the street. rating: +18 || warnings: mental health (anxiety) and smut (here and there) word count: 15,7k
(ONE)
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Harry never texted her. 
Of course he didn’t. And it wasn’t as if Lia actually expected him to, but then why did he even bother asking for her number in the first place? Why pretend he wanted to talk to her? Why pretend there was the slight chance they would ever interact again?
Lia tightened the grip around her grocery bag and sighed. Her mind was about to explode. It really was. She was too tired, and not even the fact that it was already Friday and the weekend was ahead of her was enough to cheer her up. 
There was just too much going on. She couldn’t stop thinking, so she hadn’t been sleeping very well. 
After Harry had left her apartment, Lia had locked the door and leaned her back against it. And then she’d closed her eyes and recalled everything that had just happened — from Harry running after her, to him looking one last time over his shoulder and waving one final goodbye before walking down the stairs.
Their interaction had started for the wrong reasons, but it had been too good to be true, and not at all a fantasy of her mind. 
Harry standing in her living room had been real. His words, his stare, his smile. The sound of his laughter. The way he had cared about apologizing to her… 
It had all been real, it had all actually happened. 
And it had stirred a new feeling of excitement in the pit of her stomach. It had made her walk to the kitchen with a massive grin on her face, then giggle to herself while preparing things for the next day. 
Then of course, as minutes went by, everything she had just spent weeks promising herself she wouldn’t do anymore, happened all over again. 
She wasn’t proud of it. She tried to stop herself, but she couldn’t. No matter how innocent his actions had been, they were enough to fuel her with endless ideas and possibilities of how that night could’ve ended instead. And although she felt terribly embarrassed to admit, for more than one second she’d allowed herself to truly entertain those thoughts.
She imagined a conversation where she had been interesting and fun enough to captivate him. Or to fascinate him, just as much as he had fascinated her. She imagined her acting confident enough to seduce him, confident enough to flirt with him. She imagined Harry reciprocating the feeling. And a moment where, instead of leaving to go back to work, Harry ended up touching her freely and thoroughly. She imagined him hugging her, kissing her. Making her feel everything she so desperately wanted to feel. She so desperately needed to feel.
By the time she was lying in bed in silence and staring through the window, reality had hit her again: inviting Harry inside of her apartment had been a terrible, terrible idea.
She’d just gone from wondering what being around him would look and be like, to actually knowing it. And no matter how great she could be feeling right then and there, at the end of the day it would only complicate things. She knew that. It would only make everything worse. 
At the same time, as ashamed as Lia felt of her imagination, the truth is that Harry’s real words weren’t helping her, either — like when he mentioned he owed her a drink, or when he asked for her number. 
Those very real words weren’t easy to get rid of. They echoed inside Lia’s mind constantly, ruining all of her attempts of never thinking about him again. They kept her company in the mornings while getting ready for work, then at lunch and in between classes, and also all over the afternoons. They popped up again, randomly, as she jumped off the bus and waved a timid goodbye to the very well-known driver, and again later at night when she took a shower, ordered takeaway and went to bed once again.
During the weekend, because she needed a distraction, once again she’d taken a train back to her parents. And it helped her, mostly because it meant also getting to see her brother and sister-in-law. Something she enjoyed. Something she always thought she should do more often, anyway.
But then it was Monday, and she was back into the real world. Going from her apartment to work. And from work to her apartment. 
By Friday, after almost getting no sleep all week and paying no attention to anything but work, she wasn’t only ashamed and embarrassed—she was also sad and frustrated at how lame and uneventful her life was.
She was tired of living inside of her imagination, and angry at only watching others reaching their dreams and happiness. She was mad for not being able to let things go, and she was bored of the way she handled things. 
And, above it all, she was longing for someone who could take all her loneliness away.
It was a mix of emotions that she could only express by huffing and grumbling to herself as she stood in front of her building, one hand inside of her stupid gigantic bag while she frowned and blindly searched for her keys.
She had only left the house to go to the grocery store, so why did she even take that thing bag with her? And why was there always so much stuff inside it? 
She was so distracted and so madly annoyed at herself and her life, that she didn’t hear the bam when Harry closed the door of his car; nor the beep beep when he pressed the alarm and locked it; nor the pitter-patter when he got closer to her building. She also didn’t notice when he stopped by the first step, nor when he leaned his side against the railing and crossed his arms on his chest, nor when he watched her with an amused smirk on his face.
“Need some help there?”
Lia jumped and turned around, and the gasp that left her mouth was muffled by the crash of her bag hitting the ground, right next to her feet.
“Shit.” Harry ran up the steps in a blink of an eye, then squatted in front of her. 
Lia tucked her chin and looked down, letting her arms hang loosely by her sides and watching as he gathered the few objects that had fallen from her bag and threw them back inside.
He was wearing her favorite t-shirt — again. The old tight fabric perfectly outlining the muscles on his back and shoulders as he moved his arms here and there. 
His voice was a soft murmur in the back of her ringing ears, and she only noticed he was actually saying something when he placed one elbow on his bent knee and looked up at her with a frown on his face. 
“Sorry.” Lia shook her head and took a step back. “W—what?”
“I was just apologizing.” He stood up, pulling her bag along with him by the thick strap. “Didn’t mean to scare you.”
Lia tightened her fingers around the single grocery bag she was holding, gripping at it as if her sanity depended on that frozen pizza she’d just bought for dinner.
“Right.” She nodded slowly, then licked her chapped lips. “It’s fine, yeah. You didn’t scare me.”
Harry half-snorted, half-scoffed. “I sure did, love. Is everything alright?”
Lia slumped her shoulders, and a lough sigh escaped through her lips and nose. She closed her eyes and scratched her forehead, then told him the exact same lie she’d been telling every single person who’d asked that same question in the last couple days.
“Yeah… Everything’s fine. Long week at work, that’s all.”
Harry hummed, and when she opened her eyes again, she found him leaning his lower back against the railing of her building. 
He looked at her curiously, green eyes staring at her as if he could see a different answer written all over her face. 
It was unsettling, but also oddly comforting at the same time. 
“Haven’t seen you at the bar anymore,” he finally said.
Lia looked around the street, watching the few people walking by. 
She didn’t know how to answer him. She didn’t know what to say. It wasn’t even a question, to begin with. He didn’t see her at the bar, because she didn’t go to the bar. Period. It seemed obvious, and boring. 
Was there anything else she could say instead? Something that would be more… Interesting? 
“Hey.” Harry circled her wrist with one hand, then gently squeezed.
Lia looked back at him, only to be met with the beautiful sight of a closed-mouth smile, a dimple, and wrinkles around his eyes. 
“You sure you’re ok?” He let his arm fall back to his side. “You look tired.”
Lia shifted on her feet and looked down, pulling her hair over one shoulder. She used her fingers to brush through her locks and put down some of her untamed strands. Then, as she rubbed under her nose with the side of one finger, she took her occupied hand to pull the hem of her sweater down.
“I look like a mess, I know,” she mumbled, shrugging one shoulder. “I guess… I haven’t been sleeping that much.”
Or at all.
“That sucks.”
The tone of his voice carried his sentiment, and she fed her curiosity by glancing at him. Once again, she met his green, caring and concentrated eyes, and for a moment she was convinced the entire world had stopped just for them.
There was a curl threatening to fall onto his forehead, and a very obvious stubble around his soft mouth — covering his chin, the sides of his face and the mole on the left side of his bottom lip.
The smoothness of his facial hair drew even more attention to his unprompted dimples, and the boyish breeze around him clashed with the intensity pouring out from his broad shoulders, sharped jaw and thick neck.
He stood so unconcerned in front of her, casually leaning against the cold iron that led to the front door of her building and holding the strap of her bag with both hands as it hung in between his parted legs and— 
“Oh my God!” Lia gasped. Shit. She straightened her back and took a step closer to him, stretching her arm to clasp her fingers around the strap of her bag. “‘M so sorry. You’ve been holding this and I just… I didn’t… I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
Shaking her head, Lia pulled one side of the strap towards her chest, expecting Harry to easily let it go. 
Harry tugged back, though, yanking her forward and in between his legs.
A yelp left her throat as she stumbled on her feet, her hand flying up along with the grocery bag to hold herself on his chest.
Harry’s free hand landed on her waist, keeping her in place while his other hand remained attached to the strap of her bag, just like hers.
“Just to be clear,” Harry murmured, sinking his fern green eyes into her dark brown ones. “I never said you look like a mess.”
Lia pressed her lips together and breathed out through her nose, then drifted her eyes down and between them. 
Her hand was still on his chest, and a tingling swept up through the back of her neck and across her face — she had just shoved a grocery bag into Harry’s chest. A grocery bag, with a frozen pizza in it. 
And he didn’t seem at least one bit bothered by it.
“It’s not what I meant, either, y’know,” he added. “When I said you look tired.”
Lia swallowed the nervousness down, ignoring the way her cheeks were burning. 
(Or, well, maybe actually trying to ignore the way her entire body was burning.)
“What… Uh… What did you mean, then?”
Harry shrugged, slightly digging his fingers into her waist. The way he held her, so firmly and yet so casually, made her heart skip a couple of beats. It was hard to pay attention to what was happening whilst also being hyper-aware of everything she was feeling, and an overwhelming emotion she couldn’t name spread all over her chest. 
“Just that I can tell you’re not doing ok.”
Oh. 
Lia frowned. 
Was that… 
Was that supposed to make her feel better? 
Harry let her waist go and reached for her hand, covering her hold around her bag. “May I?”
She answered by loosening the grip on the strap, and his response was just as instant — he slid his fingers under her palm and held her firmly, meanwhile lowered the item to the floor with his other hand and slowly dropped it between his feet. 
“I can also tell you could use a good night of sleep… Or maybe two,” he added. He took his new free fingers to his chest, removing the grocery bag from her other hand and putting it on the floor, too. “Probably could use some loosening up. Have some fun. Laugh a little.”
“Right,” she whispered, if only to stop him from listing everything that was wrong with her life. Or everything that could be better. Or everything that was missing. “That…” She cleared her throat. “Was that supposed to make me feel better? Because… I mean… None of that sounds good, y’know?”
Harry’s lips twitched up. 
“Yes, I know…” He nodded. He took his hand up to her face, brushing her skin while putting her hair away and locking it behind her ear. “Sorry. Promise it’s coming from a place of worry, though. That’s all.”
Her chest tightened, and her stomach swirled.
“I—I mean…” Lia licked her lips. “No need to worry. I’ll be fine. It’s nothing.”
“Hmm…” He let his arm fall on his lap, but his other hand kept holding hers, thumb moving in circles and gently brushing her skin. “Is there anything I can do? I’m here if you need any help.”
Lia furrowed her brows. “Like what?” 
“I don’t know…” Harry shrugged. “Whatever you need. Or want.”
An awkward laugh left Lia’s mouth, and she shook her head. 
If Harry knew what was keeping her awake at night, he wouldn’t be offering that.
“It’s fine. Thank you.”
“Ok,” he murmured. “What about tonight, then? Any plans?”
“Well… I just bought myself a frozen pizza, so…”
“Hmmm.” Harry smiled. “Yummy…”
Lia bit her lip. The low and teasing tone of his voice made her skin tingle.
“And what about after dinner?” 
“What—What about it?”
“Any chance you’ll come over to the bar? I still owe you a drink, remember?”
She brushed the tips of her fingers on his t-shirt, drawing random patterns before slowly pulling her arm away from him.
“I... I don’t think so. Sorry. I just... I’m really tired, and I don’t think being around too many people will help… It’s just… I don’t know… I guess… A lot of information? If that makes sense? Sorry, I don’t know how to explain it and—"
“Hey,” he called, squeezing her hand. “I get it. Makes perfect sense.”
“It does?”
“Yeah. Of course. The bar can get really loud and crowded… Not fun at all if all you want is to relax.”
“Yeah…” Lia blinked. Again and again. “That’s… Yeah. Thank you.”
He tilted his head. “Why are you thanking me?”
“I don’t know… For understanding? I guess? Not a lot of people do that.”
Harry rolled his eyes. “That’s ‘cause people suck.”
Lia snorted, and chuckled. She dropped her head, covering her mouth while her shoulders moved up and down. 
Hopefully, even though he was standing extremely close to her, Harry wouldn’t see the way her entire face scrunched up when she laughed. It wasn’t a very pretty sight to see. 
“Lia?”
She cleared her throat, shaking her head twice before taking a deep breath in and lifting up her chin. 
“Yeah?”
Their eyes found each other, and Lia immediately froze. 
Harry wasn’t laughing, and he wasn’t smiling. But he wasn’t mad, either. He held her stare with an inquisitive look, and it was so intense that it made her gulp down, unsettled by the hint of something flashing through them—something she was afraid to name, but wasn’t so hard to guess. 
“I��m glad you called me an asshole.”
She raised her eyebrows, and her voice was barely a whisper when she asked, “You are?”
“Mhm.” Harry nodded. “I really am.”
“W—why?”
He slid his tongue between his lips, getting them wet. They glistened under the sunset shades that surrounded them, and Lia stared at their slow movements as he spoke. “It brought us here, didn’t it?”
Shutting her mouth, Lia blinked blankly at him.
“I mean, of course I wish I hadn’t made you feel like that in the first place, but still… I’m glad you called me out for it.”
“Yeah I don’t… Usually do that, y’know? That’s why I freaked out and… Why I was so embarrassed about it. I guess I’m just… I’m just not brave enough to speak up. I don’t know.”
“If you don’t mind, I’ll respectfully disagree with that. You seem a lot braver than most people I know.”
Lia looked down, not able to hold back a smile. 
“I think…” she murmured. “I think I should go. It’s getting late.”
“Is it? Huh… Could stay here for hours.” 
Heat flushed up her neck, then spread all over her face. 
“Don’t you have to work tonight?”
“Oh, ooook then.” Harry laughed and stood up, straightening his body and causing her to stumble backwards. “Gotcha. Message received. I’m leaving now.”
“What? No!” Lia shook her head. “What message? I wasn’t—I just… It’s Friday, so I know it gets busier at the bar and… I wasn’t… Y’know… I didn’t mean… I just—" 
“Hey, hey…” Harry squeezed her hand, pulling her to step closer and into him again. “I know. I’m just teasing you, love. It’s fine.”
“Ugh… I really suck at this.” 
“You don’t.”
“Of course I do.”
“You don’t, and I mean it. If anything, I think it makes you even more interesting.” 
They stared at each other. 
Stared at each other. 
And stared at each other. 
They stared and stared, until the trembling inside Lia’s belly felt too much and she looked away.
Harry cleared his throat.
“Ok… I’ll let you go now, since it’s getting late and you’ve got a frozen pizza to cook…” he teased, happiness lingering in his voice. “But I’ll see you around, tho, right?”
“Y-yeah, sure… I—I’ll see you around.” 
Lia nodded, forcing her smile to stay longer even though the idea of saying goodbye to him only brought sadness to her chest. 
What the hell was happening?
And how long would it take until she saw him again?
— — — — — 
Pam was on the phone with her mom and Jim had just walked in the office when Lia’s phone buzzed on the couch, next to her thigh. 
How’s pizza?  Keeping you company?
Lia furrowed her brows, checking twice that the texts had been sent by an unknown number. And then her heart skipped a beat, and her hands began to sweat.
The idea of Harry reaching out was just as exciting and joyful as scary and unbelievable. To be fair, she couldn’t imagine who else it could be, but she also was too afraid to just assume. What if someone was pranking her? What if he was pranking her?
Her phone buzzed again.
This is Harry, btw. 
“Shit,” Lia murmured. 
She sat upright and pulled the blanket off from her lap, then grabbed her phone with her trembling and nervous hands.
It took her at least five minutes to come up with a calm and collected answer.  
still in the oven hi harry:)
Heat spread through her cheeks. 
She was so lame. So boring. 
Why was Harry even texting her?!
Her phone buzzed again.
Hii :) That’s a shame  You should’ve found yourself better company
Lia stared at her phone and bit her lip. 
The opportunity was there, right in front of her. In a fantasy world, she would’ve pointed out how he should’ve kept her company instead. Or maybe she would have invited him to be that better company. 
Both options ran through her mind. Both options tinkled on her fingers. And yet, it was Lia’s world she lived in, so she settled for the safest words to say. 
it was the best thing I could find at the grocery store
Opposite from her, he didn’t take a second to reply. As if he didn’t even need to think before he spoke.
Hmmm  Maybe next time you should try somewhere else, then
She read his text once, and twice. For a moment, an empty feeling in the pit of the stomach turned into nausea, but then her mind seemed to act on its own. Disconnecting from the rest of her body as it directed her fingers to type again.
I might… do you have any recommendations?
The three dots on Harry’s side of the conversation came up quickly, then they flashed for a while. And then, they disappeared. 
Lia swallowed hard, watching the screen for another minute or two just to make sure that no more answers would come through. When they didn’t, her stomach clenched, and the nausea became hard to ignore. So she put her phone away and stared back at the TV, pulling her knees to her chest and pretending to pay attention while she kept checking through the corner of her eyes. Then wincing every time she thought about her last text to him. Or how she never got a reply. 
Not then, not ten minutes later, and not even half an hour later. 
No matter how much she checked her phone, or how many times she peeked at the screen for a new notification, Harry’s answer was nowhere to be seen.
— — — — — 
Half a pizza and three episodes of The Office later, a loud knock on her door had Lia jumping on her seat. She paused the show with a frown, then waited to see if something else would happen. 
Maybe she could get away with pretending she wasn’t home. Maybe whoever was on the other side would give up and move on to the next door.
But then…
Another knock. And another one. 
And Lia finally got on her feet — because what if something bad had happened? What if someone was hurt? 
Another knock on the door. 
“Just a second!” she yelled, walking as fast as she could with her slippery purple socks.
She rubbed the tip of her nose and took a deep breath, then turned the key around and stepped aside to reveal… 
Harry?
Lia jerked her head back, chin slightly going down while she blinked at the tall figure standing in front of her.  
“Good evening, miss,” he said with a thick British accent and overly-polite voice. A proud smirk matched the twinkle in his eyes, and it only got deeper when he raised one hand and showed off a glass. “Did you order a mojito?”
.
.
.
Lia just… Stopped functioning? Or her mind went completely blank. And then, after a moment, her body reacted unconsciously, all at once—her arms fell to her sides, her mouth fell open, and her eyes widened. 
Maybe only a second passed until Harry chuckled and spoke again. Or maybe a minute, or maybe an hour. It would be hard to tell, and she wasn’t even paying attention to that. It didn’t really matter. 
“Surprised?” he asked.
Lia blinked once. Then twice. Then a couple of more times. 
“I…”
Dizzy, she shook her head and closed her mouth, swallowing the awkwardness down and darting her tongue between her lips. 
“I mean…” She pulled each side of her cardigan with one hand and crossed her arms on top of her belly, covering the old white loose tank top she had at some point of her life turned into pajamas. “Yes? Y—yes! Of course! What are you doing here?”
Harry shrugged. “I brought you a mojito.”
Lia glanced at Harry’s hand, then at his face, then back at his hand. The glass looked minuscule while wrapped inside his long fingers, but it was there. It was actually there.
“But I don’t… I didn’t …”
She furrowed her brows, and slowly dragged her attention back to his eyes.
What the hell was happening?!
“I know.”
“I don’t get it.”
“I brought you a mojito.”
“Why?”
Harry shrugged.
“Because I wanted to cheer you up.”
“But why?”
Amusement crossed Harry’s face. He tilted his head to the side, and his lips twitched into a smile. 
“Sorry,” Lia said. “I just…”
She glanced at the glass in his hand. Green leaves, ice cubes and lime wedges. Her stomach fluttered, and she tightened the grip around her own body. 
It truly was a mojito. A mojito. 
Out of all the things he could’ve surprised her with, that’s what he had chosen?
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath in, then slowly released the air out of her body. It was embarrassing to have to do that in front of him, but it was the only way she knew to be effective and get rid of the tension off her shoulders. It was what she did all the time — breathe, sigh, breathe again. Calm down her desperate heart. 
“Sorry.” She blinked, then focused back on his green stare. “I just honestly don’t know how to react… I mean… I wasn’t expecting this. At all.”
His face softened, and he shrugged one shoulder. 
“No need to react,” Harry said, putting his free hand inside of his pocket and stretching his other arm towards her. “Just take it inside with you. Drink it. Give it to your plants. Flush it away. Whatever you want. I’ll never know.”
Lia chuckled. 
She unclasped her arms calmly, lifting one of them to wrap her fingers around the glass. They inevitably brushed Harry’s skin, and her breath sped up, matching her already racing heart. 
“Thank you,” she said, holding his stare as she pulled the drink closer to her body. “Of course I’ll drink it.”
He smiled into her eyes, and Lia glanced down to the mojito. 
“Did you make it?”
At that, Harry scoffed. “‘Course I did. Why? Should’ve I asked Rohan?”
Lia furrowed her brows.
“What? No.” She shook her head. “That’s not… He never gets it how I like it.”
There was a pause, then a soft chuckle left Harry’s mouth. 
“Oh my God.” Lia widened her eyes, then raised her chin to stare back at him. Harry was laughing silently at the floor. “Please don’t tell him I said that.”
“I won’t.”
“I mean, it’s not that I don’t think he’s good… Shit. Not him… The mojitos… I mean… His mojitos are good… It’s just… He’s not… I don’t… He’s—"
“Hey.” Harry placed his hand on her shoulder, and Lia pressed her lips together. He wasn’t laughing anymore, and his eyes soothed her. “I won’t say a word, I promise.”
Lia sighed.
“Thanks.”
Harry let her go, shoving his now-mojito-free hand inside of his other pocket and curling his lips up.
“Hope you’ll like mine, tho.”
“I… I will. Yeah.”
I always do, she wished she could add. 
Making sure the words wouldn’t slip out of her mouth, she lifted the glass up to her lips and took a timid sip out of it. 
Almost immediately, heat radiated down her throat and through her chest. So she closed her eyes and took a second and longer sip, focusing on properly tasting it this time. 
The flavors were all easy to recognize—the mint, the lime, the club soda, and the rum. When she swallowed, she pressed her lips together in a smile, unintentionally humming at the sweetness and freshness. 
It was… Delicious. The perfect balance between all ingredients, including the amount of sugar and ice. 
Harry cleared his throat, and Lia batted her lashes to focus her sight on him once again.
He watched her with a grin on his face, and her heart skipped a beat.
“Good?”
“Yeah,” Lia whispered. “Really good. Delicious, actually.”
Harry grinned even wider, and Lia found herself smiling, too. 
“Thank you,” she said.
“Of course. Maybe next time you can get some mojitos instead of pizza. I’m sure they’ll enjoy keeping you company.” 
Butterflies batted their wings in her belly, and a rush of adrenaline bolted through her veins. 
“T—they?”
Harry shrugged. “Yeah… Y’know… The mojitos… Me…” 
Lia shuffled on her feet, wiggling her toes inside her purple socks. 
“I was going to tell you that earlier, by the way,” he added, saving her from the embarrassment of letting him know she had no idea how to answer that. “But things got crazy at the bar and I had to put my phone down so… Sorry.” 
“That’s—That’s fine. Don’t worry about it.” She cleared her throat, then tightened the grip of her fingers around the glass. “Do you… Uh… Do you have to go? Or… Maybe… I don’t know… I mean… Would you… Would you like to come in?”
Harry tilted his head and, just like earlier, his eyes twinkled with something. Something different, though. Playfulness, maybe? Or amusement? 
Mischief, perhaps? 
Lia wasn’t sure, but whatever it was, it didn’t make her uncomfortable, nor embarrassed. 
“Would love to, really. But I gotta go back to work… I’m sure my break ended a while ago.”
“Oh… Y—yeah, right. Of course. Sorry.”
Harry chuckled. “Don’t be. I’d rather stay here with you, to be honest.”
Feeling herself about to smile again, Lia looked down at the drink in her hand and bit her lip. 
“Uh… And what… What time do you finish work, then?”
“Tonight?”
“Mhm.”
Harry took a tiny step forward, and Lia held her breath. 
“Well… We close the bar at two.”
“Right.”
The last t left her mouth and echoed in the hallway, and Lia watched Harry’s feet get closer and closer as he walked forward, stopping only when he was right in front of her. 
He took a hand out of his pocket and lifted his arm, then placed his fingers under her chin and forced her to look up at him again. 
The butterflies seemed to abandon her belly and fly all over her body, because every inch and every corner inside her tingled and fluttered. 
Harry wasn’t smiling anymore. The playfulness on his face had been replaced by determination, but his eyes were still soft and gentle when staring inside hers. 
“Any chance you’ll still be awake by then?”
“M—maybe? I mean, I could be.”
“You could, huh?”
Lia shrugged, then nodded.
The smirk grew easily on his lips. 
“You sure? It’s gonna be late… I don’t wanna bother you.”
Lia’s heart pounded inside her chest. So loudly she was afraid even Harry could hear it. 
Truthfully speaking, there was absolutely no way Lia would ever stay awake so late just to meet someone. 
However this wasn’t just someone, was it? It was Harry. 
Harry.
The guy she had been secretly dreaming about for almost a year now. 
Would she be able to forgive herself if she didn’t try?
Of course she wouldn’t. 
So Lia silently and slightly nodded again. 
“Hmm…” He brushed his thumb up and down her jaw. “In that case… How do you feel about watching a movie?”
Lia licked her lips, and swallowed. “Here?”
“Mhmm.”
“After your shift?”
Harry nodded. 
“I—Yeah. Okay. I’d like that.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Will you stay awake for me, then?”
“Mhmm… I’ll… I’ll be awake.”
“Good.” He moved his thumb up and down again, then slid his hand to her neck and held her for a moment before he dropped his arm back to his side. “See you in a couple hours, then.”
— — — — — 
At 2:17am, Lia buzzed Harry in. 
She waited for him in the hallway, leaning against the doorframe with her arms crossed under her chest. Her insides blazed with anticipation, and the sweating of her hands was getting hard to control—and even harder to hide. 
Everything was silent. Quiet. Empty. The perfect scenario for her to get lost inside her mind and start doubting every decision she’d ever made leading to that exact moment in time. 
Shit.
Lia looked down at her feet and tapped her heel on the floor. 
She couldn’t start spiraling. Not right then. Not when she was about to see the guy she had fantasized about for so long. Not when she was about to watch a movie with the guy she had crushed on for so long. Not when she was finally getting attention from the guy she had silently dreamed about for so long. 
She couldn’t. She really couldn’t.
And yet… 
She should’ve put on something more flattering to see him... Shouldn’t she? 
She didn’t want him to notice she had showered, shaved, and changed her underwear just to see him, so she had put on the same outfit he’d had seen earlier—the same gray loose pants and basic white tank top, and even the same beige cardigan and purple socks. Which was also the same outfit she had slept on the night before, and that she was planning to wear to bed again that night.
Shit.
What was wrong with her?
Why couldn’t she have tried a little bit harder?
Desperation sparked and unrolled inside her, but then the sound of Harry’s feet reached her ears, loud and clear — walking up the stairs, a floor or two below. And that was enough to absorb all of her attention. To make her forget all about everything and look up. 
Look up and just wait for him. 
Wait to see him.
Those minutes  it took for him to get to her floor were the worst. And the longest. Harry took his time, climbing step by step. And the anticipation inside Lia’s body seemed to increase a hundred times. 
By the time she finally saw him, her heart was racing, and her belly quivering. 
Harry looked handsome. Like earlier, and like he always did. 
He was wearing all black, though, something she hadn’t noticed earlier, when he’d brought her the mojito. Wasn’t he wearing her favorite t-shirt when they’d met outside? 
His curls were messier than before, too. His cheeks were flushed, and there was a glimmer of sweat peeking from the back of his neck. 
He seemed tired, and it made sense that he was.
Guilt flared all over her. 
Friday nights at the bar were busy. Anyone could imagine that. And Lia not only could have figured that all by herself, but she had also seen it happening right in front of her eyes at least once or twice. 
What kind of person made plans at 2am on a Friday? 
Or, well, technically, on a Saturday… But still… 
Was that even normal? 
Was it a thing? 
Was she out of her mind?
Harry looked up before reaching the last flight of steps. 
As soon as he met her eyes, he curled his lips slightly up.
“Hii,” he murmured. 
Lia bit her lip. 
Despite everything, there he was. Casually walking under the yellow lights of her hallway, as if that was exactly where he was supposed to be. Stopping by her door with certainty, as if he had been on the exact same spot hundreds of times before. And looking at her with softness and tranquility, as if she was the only cure for his exhaustion.
Lia liked that. She didn’t know what was happening or why, but she liked that. 
She liked that a lot. 
“Hi,” she murmured back, offering him a soft smile. “Come on in.” 
She gestured behind her, determined to offer her couch if only for him to sleep for as long as he needed to.
“Thanks.”
Harry walked past her with a polite smile on his face, stopping by the door to take his shoes off and then moving towards the couch. 
Meanwhile, Lia shut the door, turned the key around, and locked them inside.
And then… 
Her heart skipped a beat, and her stomach twirled. 
It was just the two of them. 
Lia and Harry. Harry and Lia. And no one else.
She hugged herself with her cardigan and breathed in, then out. When she turned around, it was just in time to see Harry drop his weight on the middle of her couch. 
Thankfully, he didn’t need an invitation to make himself at home. He put the fluffy blanket next to him and scooched backwards, squaring his shoulders against the dark pillows and spreading his legs slightly open.  Next, he sighed, dropped his neck, and rested the back of his head on the edge of the couch. 
And then, he tilted his chin to the side, and finally faced her. 
His strong eye contact captured her, and a shiver ran over her skin. 
Harry curled his mouth into another smile.
“So, did you enjoy your mojito?”
Tightening her arms under her chest, Lia looked at her feet and nodded. 
“Y—yeah… I… It was really good. Thank you.”
“‘Course. Any—” A yawn got in the way of his answer, and Lia darted her eyes up. 
Harry faced the ceiling now. His eyes were shut and his mouth was wide open. His chest went up, up, up. And then he exhaled, loudly, and his chest went back down at the same time he slowly closed his mouth. 
Lia pressed her lips together and covered half of her face with one hand, stifling her own yawn. 
“Shit.” He chuckled, shaking his head briefly then looking back at her. “Sorry. Long night at the bar.”
She shook her head and dropped her hand on top of her other arm.
“‘S fine. Don’t apologize. I shouldn’t have…”
“What?”
“I don’t know. I’m feeling kinda guilty, to be honest.” 
“Guilty? Why?”
Lia shrugged. 
“For making you come here after work? I mean…” She looked at the TV on the wall across from him, and then at her feet. “It’s so late… I get it if you’re tired. I should’ve thought about that."
There was a pause. 
A beat. 
Maybe two. 
Or maybe three. 
Or maybe none.
It didn’t matter. The silent air wasn’t heavy around them.
Eventually, she gathered enough courage to lift her head and look at him again. It wasn’t necessarily a surprise to find Harry already staring, but it still made her chest tighten. 
So she bit her lip. 
And Harry blinked. Several times. 
Then, he cleared his throat.
“You know I wanted to come here, right?” he asked. “I thought I was being obvious, but I don’t mind saying it. Like, I was the one who suggested this, so if anything I’m the one who feels like a dickhead for making you stay up so late.”
An amused—yet small—smile grew on Lia’s face. 
“I didn’t mind.” She shrugged. “I wanted to wait.”
Harry smiled, too. 
“And I wanted to see you. So that’s settled.”
Warmth filled Lia’s chest, and her body tingled. Unable to hold herself from stupidly smiling, she pursed her lips tightly, then bit the insides of her bottom lip. The feeling took over her brain, though, and without any warning, happiness erupted out of her mouth in the form of soft and genuine giggles. 
“Sorry,” she said, taking a hand up to her face and covering her lips. 
Harry sighed. 
“C’mon now,” he said, patting the cushion next to him. “You’re too far away.”
It was hard to contain the butterflies and nerves, but she still found a way to move her legs and shortened the distance between them. She uncrossed her arms to put her hair behind her ears, looking at the floor and being careful to not step on his feet or trip on his ankles as she made her way past his knees. 
His head followed her movements along with his eyes, turning from one side to the other. 
When she sat next to him and lifted her chin, she glanced directly at his eyes.
Harry was already beaming at her.
“Hi,” he murmured.
Excitement fluttered deep in the pit of her stomach, and Lia smiled. 
“Hi,” she murmured back. “I love mojitos.”
Harry chuckled, moving his head and closing his eyes to the ceiling. 
Damnit. 
Turning slightly to see him better, Lia observed him with adoration. It felt impossible not to. He was captivating. There was something truthfully genuine about him. A simplicity surrounding his eyes, wrinkling his skin in a boyish way. Even tired, and even after a long shift, a glowing energy surrounded him. And it was mesmerizing. 
He was mesmerizing. 
“You do, yeah,” he said, still smiling, and tilting his head to face her again. “I’ve noticed.”
“Really?”
“Mhmm.”
“I… That’s…”
Lia blinked. Actually, she didn’t know what to say, so she furrowed her brows and shut her mouth. 
What did he mean by that? 
Had he noticed how much she loved mojitos in general, or how much she loved his mojitos?
And what else he had noticed about her?
Had he noticed how deeply into him she was?
How much she stared at him?
How much she daydreamed about him?
“I should’ve asked you on a proper date, y’know?” Harry said. A playful smile grew on his face, and his tone came out teasingly. “Take you out somewhere nice… On normal hours… After at least taking a shower…”
He sounded calm, as if that was the most natural thing he could say to her. 
Lia’s chest, on the other hand, kept moving up and down quickly, as if her heart and lungs had completely forgotten how they were supposed to function to keep her alive. 
“A—a… A d—date?” she barely managed to ask.
“Well, yeah.” Harry dragged his eyes off hers, only to watch himself raise his arm and reach for a lock of her hair. “A date feels more… I don’t know… Gentleman…ly?”
He chuckled — tiredly, but honestly. 
“Is that even a word?” he asked, twirling her hair around his finger. “Anyway…”
He stopped moving, yet didn’t pull his hand away. Meeting her gaze again, uncertainty flashed through his eyes, but soon was covered with the comfort of his smile. “I should have, but… I guess I just didn’t want to wait. So this late night thing just kinda happened, y’know?” 
Lia swallowed. 
“Y—yeah… I know.” 
He placed his hand on her neck, resting four fingers on the side of her throat while his thumb stroked up and down her jaw and cheek. 
“You have a beautiful smile, by the way,” Harry suddenly pointed out.  
“W—what?”
“I wanted to tell you earlier, but…” He shrugged. “You hide everytime you smile or laugh, and it’s just... I don’t know. It’s beautiful to see you smiling. That’s all.”
Lia’s neck burned, blood rushed through her cheeks, and the cardigan she was wearing turned out to be too much for her now boiling body. Thoughts swirled so quickly that it was hard to catch them. Her mind raced, and it yelled. It yelled so loudly that it became silent, and everything went blank—as if her brain had finally given up on her.
“Sorry,” Harry said, dropping his hand and shaking his head. He shifted on the couch, then. Straightening his back, he turned sideways and fully faced her, then folded the leg that was closest to her body up on the couch and squeezed his ankle underneath his other knee. “Bet you didn’t think I could get this soppy, huh?” 
Harry joked and chuckled.  
Lia blinked a couple of times. He was trying to lighten up the conversation, she could tell, but there was no way she would just laugh. She didn’t want to. 
So she shifted on the couch and mimicked his previous movements, turning around to fully face him and folding her closest leg to him under the other. 
And that was all it needed for their legs to touch. 
“Thank you.”
A slow smile grew on Harry’s face, causing Lia’s mouth to curl up as well. 
He raised his arm and placed it on top and along the backrest, invading not only all of her senses, but also her physical space. 
Lia looked down and between them, watching the way their thighs were pressed against each other. Watching the way so many of her dreams were slightly coming true. 
That is, until Harry spoke again. 
“Let’s talk about Rohan,” he said, and Lia jolted her head up.
She scrunched her face up in confusion, opening and closing her mouth a couple of times before she was able to slowly breathe out one single word: “What?”
“Rohan, from the bar.”
“From the—” Lia shook her head, and the tone of her voice suddenly catched up with her emotions. “Of course I know who Rohan is! But what—You—Why would we even talk about him?!”
Harry shrugged, a playful and amused smirk crossing his face. “Because you two seem close… Have fun together…”
Lia gasped, her mouth falling open as one incredulous and single laugh bursted out from her chest.
“We barely— We just talk!”
Harry nodded. “I know.”
“So?” Lia scoffed discreetly, the sound getting caught on her throat. “That’s hardly having fun.”
“Hmm… Well, I don’t know. I just thought something would’ve happened between you two by now. That’s all.”
Lia flinched her chin back, eyebrows raising while she batted her eyelashes in disbelief. 
“That’s—Again, what?!”
Harry shrugged, his expression getting serious as he looked away from her. 
“He’s clearly into you,” he said. “You know that, c’mon. Thought you fancied him, too. That’s all.” Another shrug, and then, “Don’t you?”
“Oh my…” Lia whispered.
She furrowed her brows and dropped her chin down, once again looking at their thighs. 
“I can’t believe this. Why… Why would you think that? That’s so… I mean, where did you get that stupid idea from? And why would you even bring it up right now?”
Her shoulders fell. And her body relaxed.
Damn. It felt so good to just say whatever was going through her head. At least for once.
“So… You don’t?” 
Lia breathed in, and raised her chin. 
Harry was looking at her again, but he kept narrowing his eyes, as if he was ready to call her out for lying. 
He wasn’t teasing her. 
Harry was actually doubting it. 
He was actually after an answer. 
Lia blinked. Multiple times. And then more laughter bursted out from deep inside her. 
“Oh my God, Harry! No! Of course not!”
“You say it like it’s supposed to be obvious!”
Harry laughed, too—although from the way his voice wavered, it seemed more like nervous laughter. Or maybe a questioning one. Or a suspicious one. 
Either way, it wasn’t actually joyful. It didn’t feel like it, at least. 
So Lia pressed her lips together, then took another deep breath in. 
Honestly, where was he coming from? 
Had she ever done anything that could lead him to believe that? Because she was convinced she hadn’t. In fact, all along she had been afraid Harry would find out how attracted to him she was. Not to Rohan.
“Well… Yeah.” Lia shrugged. “I don’t know, but to me it is pretty obvious… I mean… Why would I even be here if I fancied him?”
“Huh.” Harry raised his eyebrows. 
He blinked once, and then squinted, focusing on her eyes as though he was trying to find the secret answer for an unasked question written deep inside them.
That whole interaction was too weird. And not at all what Lia was expecting for that night—or any other night, for that matter.  
“I just…” she said, then paused for a moment to gather her thoughts. Pressing her lips together, she batted her eyelashes and looked towards the back of the couch, targeting the wall. She sighed, and tried again. "I don’t… I don’t get why you thought I… That I wanted… But you didn’t notice that I—Y’know… That I… Ugh!" 
Shaking her head, Lia took her hand to rub her forehead and chuckled. No matter how much she wanted to tell him, she couldn’t do it. She really couldn’t. 
They were having such a great night…
What if she ruined everything? 
What if she told him how much she fancied him and he decided to leave? 
What if she decided to be open and honest about her feelings for him, and he turned her down? 
She wouldn’t be able to talk to him again. She wouldn’t be able to look at him again. And she would never be able to get over the humiliation. 
So she couldn’t risk it. She just couldn’t. 
“Hey,” Harry said, placing his hand on top of hers. 
Immediately, Lia loosened up. She relaxed the grip of her fingers, dropped her shoulders, and looked down at her lap. 
And then, she frowned. 
Apparently, she’d been gripping at her own hands, tightly squeezing them while completely unaware of it. Her muscles were sore, and there were small prints on the places where the tips of her fingers had sunk on her own skin. 
“Lia…” Harry sneaked his fingertips underneath her palm, breaking her hands apart. “What’s going on? What were you going to say?”
“Uh… No—nothing.” Staring at their now connected hands, Lia shook her head. “Nothing, yeah. Forget about it.”
“Oh, c’mon!” His voice was cheerful, almost playful. “Say it… Please?”
“I wasn’t going to say anything. Really.”
He kept his thumb on the back of her hand, gently and slowly caressing her skin. 
And Lia focused on that. She watched the way he moved up and down. She absorbed how soft yet rought the brush of his finger felt. She appreciated how warm, large, and strong his hold felt. 
“Lia…” 
Harry tugged her hand, pulling it off from her lap and holding it against his chest. 
The movement caused Lia to lean forward, and she looked at him. 
Harry’s intense green eyes were truly, really hypnotizing. 
She licked her lips, then softened her voice. “Just… Let it go… Please?”
Harry flickered his eyes between hers, and he studied her in silence for a moment. 
Instead of making her uncomfortable, though, it gave her enough time to focus some more on physical things. Like how he kept holding her hand firmly inside his. Secure. Fully enveloping it while clutching her palm against the middle of his chest. 
Lia was almost sure she could feel his heart beating against his ribcage, and the fabric of his t-shirt was right under her skin. 
Without dragging her eyes away from his, she moved her own thumb up and down, too. It was a subtle and cautious movement, but enough to brush and feel the texture under the pad of her finger. 
Harry curved one side of his mouth up, and gave her palm a little squeeze. 
“Fine. I’ll forget about it.”
He lifted his free hand to his hair and pushed the short curls out of the way, then dropped his arm next to Lia’s shoulder. 
After a moment of patient and quiet staring, he added, “You’re not awkward, you know? Or boring. And it’s not true that people don’t want to be friends with you.” 
Lia pressed her lips together, straightened her back, and shifted backwards. 
Right… 
They were back to that, then. 
It was nice of him to say that, sure it was, but she didn’t agree with his words. In fact, she couldn’t even believe he truly meant them. Not when, up until then, he had never cared about getting to know her. 
On the other hand, she also wasn’t expecting him to throw her own words back at her, especially because weeks had already gone by since that embarrassing night.
Her chest tightened, and she took a deep breath in. 
God. She really didn’t want to think about that night, but there was a weight in her stomach, a heaviness she didn’t know how to get rid off, so she still found the strength to open up her mouth and say, “You never wanted to, tho, did you?”
Harry widened his eyes, and Lia looked down. 
She focused on their still touching hands, then brushed off the weight of her words with a shrug. “I mean, it’s fine. I’m just saying.”
A couple of seconds passed without any answer, so Lia peeked at him through the corner of her eyes.
Harry was staring at where his other hand was, near her shoulder — with narrowed eyes, pursed lips and furrowed brows. He seemed lost inside his thoughts, and Lia rolled her lips into her mouth.
She hadn’t been wrong for pointing that out, right? It wasn’t like she wanted to, but more like she had to. More like she needed to. Because it was the truth, and it was what he had made her feel and believe all along, wasn’t it?
The fact that he had apologized to her didn’t erase the fact that he had made her snap in the first place. Right?
Or was she supposed to completely forget about that? 
Harry sighed, and Lia blinked. She relaxed her jaw, darting her tongue through her lips as she focused on him again.
“That’s…” He paused, eyeing his thumb as he grazed it over her shoulder, on top of her cardigan. “It wasn’t like that. I’m just… I’m not good with people. That’s all.”
.
..
… 
What? 
Lia was glad he wasn’t looking at her face, because she couldn’t help but frown. 
“Yes, you are,” she said, wandering her eyes around his distressed expression. “I’ve seen you with Rohan, and you’re good with him. You joke a lot, and you laugh, you offer your help when he needs it… And with Sage, I mean… I’ve only seen you around her a couple of times, but… You seemed to get along with her really quickly, so…”
The corner of Harry’s mouth turned up very slightly, only enough for her to notice it. Just like she noticed the way the muscles of his face relaxed, making all wrinkles disappear. 
He tilted his head, and met her gaze. 
Narrowing his eyes, he asked in a low and amused murmur, “How do you know that, huh? Have you been watching me?”
Shit.
“I… I mean…” Shit. Shit. Shit. “I think I…” Well, there was no point in denying it anymore, was there? “I have, yes. Yeah.”
Harry dropped their hands on his lap, then moved his thumb up and down, stroking the back of her hand. 
“You have, huh?”
Lia shrugged. “Yeah…”
“Hmm… I never noticed.”
With another shrug, Lia looked away. 
She wouldn’t answer that.
She already knew he’d never paid any attention to her, so of course he wouldn’t have noticed the way she watched him. The way she daydreamed about him. 
There was no need to point that out, though.
“Still,” Harry added, “Rohan is probably just an exception.”
“Right… And Sage?”
“Just another exception.”
Lia snorted. And chuckled.
Shaking her head, she closed her eyes for a moment. 
She needed to organize her thoughts and memories, because she knew that wasn’t the truth. She’d watched him for long enough to know that he was a joyful and caring person, but she didn’t know if that was something she should let him know, or not.
When she opened her eyes again, she met his calm and gentle stare. She bit her lip and leaned her side against the pillows, resting her shoulder under his stretched arm.
Harry kept moving his thumb gently on the back of her hand. Simply watching her. 
He didn’t seem bothered by the time it took her to answer, nor seemed to be about to rush her. 
It was different from what she was used to. Coming from him, sure, but in general, too. And it caused the words to simply roll out of her mouth. 
“I just… I’ve seen you around people, and… I don’t know…I used to see you with that girl… Well, that woman, y’know? And you always seemed so gentle to her… I mean, a gentleman, really, and I—”
Harry shifted, suddenly and abruptly. He withdrew his arm from the couch and looked away from her, then rubbed his finger under his nose. 
Lia pressed her lips together, stopping herself from talking even further. 
She’d said something wrong, hadn’t she?
She totally had. 
Of course she had. 
She looked down at her lap, biting the inside of her bottom lip. 
Harry was still holding her, but he had stopped brushing his thumb on the back of her hand. 
And she didn’t want him to stop. She really didn’t. 
“I’m… I’m sorry. I—” Shit. “I shouldn’t have said that… That was just… I didn’t— I mean—”
Shit. 
What was she supposed to say now?
She had gone too far. 
She knew that.
She knew she had entered a touchy subject.
Of course she had.
Honestly… What was wrong with her? Why would she even bring that woman up? Why would she bring someone Harry used to date up into their conversation? Why would she—Oh shit. What if… Wait, were they still together? Were they still a couple? The idea hadn’t crossed her mind… She hadn’t seen her at the bar anymore, so she’d just assumed and— Shit. 
She looked up at him. 
“Are you… You and that woman… Do you still… Are you two…” 
“I’m single, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“Oh. Okay. So… Is it over? Between you two?”
Harry nodded. 
“It’s over, yeah. Look, I don’t… We haven’t seen each other for a couple of months now and… Yeah, it’s over. I’m not going back to that.”
Lia sighed through her nose. Emptying her lungs all at once. 
At least, when he spoke, he kept his eyes on her. And Lia knew he was being honest, she recognized the struggle to let something out of your mind. 
She didn’t mean to pry, though. All she needed to know was if Harry was cheating on someone or not. And if he wasn’t, then that was enough for her. It’s not like she was planning on telling him about her own ex-boyfriend, or the few horrible one night stands she had before moving to that building. She wasn’t ready to share that much, so… Yeah, Lia understood him.
“It’s fine.” She curled her mouth up, wanting to go back to playful smiles and soft touches. “We don’t have to talk about it. Honestly. I just wanted to know if you were… You know, cheating or something.”
As soon as the last words left her mouth, Lia saw Harry flinch. His eyes darted to their laps and his shoulders tensed, and it was very obvious that she had hit a nerve there. Another nerve. 
It didn’t seem like something that made him angry, though. He didn’t look like someone who was about to yell or get into a fight. He looked… Sad? Ashamed? He looked like someone who really needed a hug. And that made Lia’s heart drop.
Had Harry’s heart been broken, just like hers?
Even worse, had Harry’s trust been broken, just like hers?
“I’m really sorry, Harry. I just… I meant… God. I keep messing it up, but… I swear in the end all I wanted to say is that I’ve seen you around other people, and that I always thought you seemed to be really nice… And like… A fun person to be around, y’know? Like, you seemed really sweet, and… I don’t know. Sorry. I’m really sorry.”
Harry took his free hand to cover his mouth and cough, clearing his throat. 
“Don’t worry about it. She’s just… She’s a complicated story and I wasn’t expecting this to come up so… Bad reaction on my side. Sorry.”
Lia sighed.
“I should’ve just… All I meant is that you seem good with people. That’s all.”
“Yeah, well…” Harry shrugged. “I don’t know about that. It takes a lot of effort, I think.”
His voice sounded lower and deeper, and Lia recognized the vulnerability in it. It felt as if he was confessing something to her, as if he was sharing a hidden part of him with her. 
Lia also recognized the struggle he had just described, and how real the statement was — interacting with people truly took a lot of effort for her, too. To the point where most of the time she chose to not interact at all. 
“Yeah,” she said, so soft it felt almost like a whisper, “I know what you mean.”
Harry peeked at her from the corner of his eyes, pulling his lips into a thankful smile, then looked away again. He didn’t say anything else. He didn’t place his arm by her shoulder anymore, and he also didn’t brush his thumb against her knuckles anymore. He just seemed lost inside his mind. 
It was easy to tell, because Lia also recognized what that looked like. What that felt like.
Apparently, the table had turned between them, and she felt the urge to make him feel better—just like he had made her feel better earlier that day.
Did Harry feel as lonely as she felt?
Gulping down, Lia looked at their still connected hands. His entire body language had changed, but he hadn’t let go of her, he hadn’t stopped touching her. 
Her lips turned up into a smile, and she bit her lip. 
Tightening her hand around his, she squeezed his fingers. She watched as she moved her own thumb up and down on the back of his hand — brushing slowly, from his wrist and up to his knuckle. 
Silence engulfed them comfortably, all while she steadily moved her thumb up and down. 
Up and down. 
Up and down.
Up… And down…
Up… 
And down…
His skin was warm and smooth under her fingertip. And the idea of pressing a kiss to his cross tattoo kept flying through her mind.
So she took a deep breath, then blinked a couple of times — because no matter how tempting it was, there was absolutely no way she was ever going to take the risk. 
“I knew your name from the first day, y’know?” Harry said.
Lia drew her eyebrows together, and lifted her head to look at him. 
“What?”
Harry shrugged, then curled the corner of his mouth up. “That day… When you said I never cared to know your name? That wasn’t true. I just never asked because I didn’t need to… I asked Rohan to ask you.”
Lia dropped her mouth open and widened her eyes. 
When she spoke, though, her voice was barely a shocked whisper, “No you didn’t.”
Harry chuckled, shaking his head and looking away for a moment. His smile was big to the point of showing off his teeth, and his eyes were practically fully closed, creating wrinkles around them. 
His reaction was so genuine… 
And apparently contagious, too, because before Lia could prevent it, her lips had already turned up into a foolish, big, and stupid grin as well. 
“I did, yeah. However…” He looked back at her. “I gotta be honest with you… That wouldn’t have happened if I’d known you two would end up fancying each other.”
“Oh my God!” Lia dropped her head back with a groan. Again? Really?! “Harry… C’mon…”
“What?” He laughed. 
Lia looked down and back at him, trying her best to hide the annoyance out of her face — although she could feel it in her body as she breathed out and loudly through her nose. 
“We don’t fancy each other.”
“Mhm. You sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure.” 
“Aren’t you his favorite customer, tho?” 
She rolled her eyes. 
“I don’t know, but he definitely isn’t my favo—”
Shit. 
Harry tilted his head, then lifted his lips up in a smirk. 
“He isn’t what? Your favorite?”
Lia snorted, then tried to pull her hand away from his.
Harry didn’t let her, though.
“Who’s your favorite, then?”
“This is… This is just… It’s just ridiculous, y’know?”  
Harry hummed. 
“Maybe. I don’t know. For what’s worth, I still think he fancies you, but…”
With a dramatic pause, he leaned forward, as if he was about to make the most important point of the night, or as if he was about to share the deepest secret of their lives.
Lia swallowed. 
He was so close. He hadn’t shaved in a while, because his stubble had gotten longer around his mouth and along his cheeks. It looked messy, almost kind of dirty, but also extremely sexy on him.
And his lips… 
Oh God… Harry’s lips were so… Attractive. They looked soft, smooth, and gentle. They weren’t the biggest or plumpest she’d ever seen, but she had certainly never wanted to kiss someone’s lips so badly like she wanted to kiss his. 
“I’m happy to know you don’t fancy him,” Harry said, his voice a tone or two lower than before.
And the way they moved… 
“You are?” she murmured.
“Mhmm…”
What would it feel like to kiss him?
What would it feel like to taste his lips?
Because she wanted to.
So bad… 
She wanted to taste his lips. 
She wanted to touch his face. 
She wanted to feel his scruff under her skin. 
What if she did? 
What if she extended her arm and brushed her fingers against his cheek? Over his facial hair? 
Would it be soft? 
Would it be scratchy?
“Hey there,” Harry said, grabbing her chin between his thumb and forefinger. His touch was both rough and delicate, holding her into place and drawing her attention back to his eyes while still being careful not to hurt her. “You seem distracted.”
Her skin tingled, and her heart hammered in her chest. 
Shit.
The smirk on his face and the tone of his voice were enough to let her know he’d seen her staring at his lips. 
And Lia didn’t—Shit. 
She was supposed to say something.
She knew she was supposed to say something. 
But every fiber of her body quivered with nervousness, and all words got stuck in her throat. 
And the way he kept looking at her… 
Fuck. 
Looking at her with those patient and soft green eyes… 
As if he had all the time in the world to stare at her… 
Or as if he had all the time in the world to wait for a proper reaction…
Shit. 
Lia’s brain was frozen. 
She had been physically attracted to him for such a long time, always watching from far away and never able to see him up close. To really see him… 
And he was being so nice to her… 
So, so nice… 
Beyond what she could’ve ever imagined he would be… 
She didn’t want to misinterpret his intentions, though… Or get her hopes up… 
She didn’t want to overstep… 
And yet… 
How could she even misinterpret his intentions, when he was right there, acting like that? 
Looking at her like that? 
Oh God. 
Lia’s breath quickened, just like her heartbeat. 
She wanted him. So much. She truly wanted him. 
Her chest tightened so hard that it was almost painful, like she needed to release the tension somehow or she would explode. She could feel it bobbing up and down in double quick time, just like she could feel her pulse throbbing not only against her ribcage, but also inside her throat and her stomach. And all over her legs. And right into her… Fuck. 
She clenched the muscles of her thighs, and swiftly shifted on the couch. 
“Lia…”
She needed a distraction. 
She needed to divert her mind from how much she wanted him. And she needed to pay attention to something that wasn’t his intense eyes burning into hers. 
She needed to say something. 
“Lia, hey…”
Anything. 
C’mon.
Just say something.
Lia… 
Say it.
Say it! 
“I always wanted to see your tattoos!” she blurted, although a little bit louder than she intended to. “Just…” She cleared her throat. “Y’know… Up close.”
There was a pause. A loud and meaningful pause, as a heartbeat coming back to life. 
She swallowed hard. 
And then Harry’s expression softened, and his mouth turned into a smile. 
A smile that genuinely lighted up his face. 
A smile so sincere and spontaneous that it slowly caused Lia to smile, too. 
So they both stared at each other, and smiled at each other. 
Widely, openly, and simply.
“Yeah?” he asked.
Well… That worked out just fine, didn’t it?
She nodded. 
“Mhmm…”
Harry went back to his previous position, letting her chin go and casually placing his elbow on the backrest of the couch. Then, without dropping the hold of her hand, he stretched his left arm and offered it to her. “You can look at them now, if you want.”
“Really?”
He brushed his thumb up and down the back of her hand and nodded.
“Of course. All yours.”
Lia nibbled her bottom lip and, without giving him any other answer, slid her gaze from his eyes to his lips, then directly to the sleek lines of his arm. 
Scanning the black ink covering most of the skin, she didn’t waste any more time before taking her free hand to his left wrist. As soon as she touched him, her fingertips tickled. She slid her tongue between her lips and outlined his anchor tattoo with delicacy, dancing with the tip of her index on top of his tender and smooth skin. 
Next, she moved on to some very tiny tattoos, brushing each one while she tried to make sense of them. There didn’t seem to be a connection between the different drawings or words, but they somehow still fit together. 
Reaching the side of his forearm, she traced a mermaid, then leaned forward when she couldn’t see the entire silhouette. 
With a deep breath, she moved her soft touch upwards, reaching his rose tattoo. 
That one seemed older, as if the ink had faded already. 
She could still see it perfectly, though. 
Drawing her index finger over the stem, she traced it from the bottom and up to the petals, then back half-way down to follow the path to the two leaves.
She took her time with that one, tracing it so carefully and so attentively that it felt bigger than it looked. 
She was enjoying the moment. Too much, to be honest. It felt intimate… Better than she could’ve ever imagined. 
Her fingertips went from tingling to burning, and when she noticed that their deep and slow breaths were the only sound echoing inside her living room, her stomach bubbled. 
Light-headed, it took her a while to finish. She wanted to give equal attention to each one of the petals, but she also didn’t want to ever stop touching him. She wanted to get even closer, and she wanted to get to know him even more. 
Would other parts of him feel the same? 
Would he ever let her explore his entire body like that? With the same discretion and delicacy? 
Would he ever let her admire and adore every inch of him?
Would he ever let her know every part of his life?
Lia was almost getting to his elbow, finishing his rose, when Harry shivered under her touch. She paused her movements and looked up, meeting his determined and fervent stare. 
He was breathing steadily through his parted lips, and he seemed flushed. 
Lia’s heartbeat sped up again, and she bit back a smile — was he enjoying all of it as much as she was? 
Shit. 
She hoped he was. 
He was so pretty. 
And she wanted him. She really wanted him. 
She felt ridiculous, but she couldn’t help it. She just did — she wanted him. 
She really-fucking wanted him. 
She wanted to hug him tightly, she wanted to lay on his chest, and she wanted to tangle their legs together. She wanted to snuggle on his lap, press her nose under his jaw, and smell the curve of his neck. She wanted to visit every corner of his body, kiss every spot along the journey, and taste every flavor of his soul. 
And it was scary, because she couldn’t remember ever wanting someone that much. 
She couldn’t remember a time in her life when her entire body had ached to touch someone. To kiss someone. 
She had never felt that desire burning up through her veins, tingling down her toes, blazing up her fingers. 
She had never experienced an overpowering feeling like that. 
To want someone like that. To need someone like that. To desire someone like that.
Like she wanted him. Like she needed him. Like she desired him.
So bad.
So, so bad.
Shit… 
She bit her lip. 
What was she supposed to do with all those feelings?
She grazed her fingers over the hem of his sleeve, then kept her hand on his arm, wrapping it around where the fabric ended and his bare skin began.
“Where…” Lia murmured, almost out of breath. “Where do they end?”
Harry blinked, then cleared his throat. 
His voice was also barely a whisper when he answered, “My tattoos?”
“Mhm.”
“It’s hard to say.”
“Oh…” She glanced to where her hand was, then bit her lip. “Okay…”
She didn’t want to get her hopes too high up, but it seemed like Harry was just as affected as she was. The atmosphere and the interaction between them had turned into something different. Something exciting. She had no doubts about it. She knew she wasn’t the only one feeling something. She knew he would say yes to whatever she asked.
For the first time, she couldn’t even question it. She just knew it. 
Harry sighed. It was enough to get her attention back, but he still moved his free hand back to her chin, once again encouraging her to stare into his eyes. 
“You’re just so…”
“W—what?”
“Beautiful.”
Lia’s stomach swirled. 
Tightening the grip on her chin and slightly pinching her skin, Harry used the tip of his thumb to touch her lips, caressing them with a stroke that went from one side to the other. He went back and forth a couple of times, then stopped precisely on top of her cupid’s bow. When he pressed his finger down, and into her closed mouth, time stopped around them. 
Lia watched him breathlessly through glossy eyes, whilst Harry immersed himself into his very own movements. 
He brushed his other four fingers towards her neck, invading the side of her throat. Then, he slid his thumb down, and pulled her bottom lip along with it. 
He stared at the way his fingertip glided through her warm, pink and damp flesh; getting wet from the ring of his finger to the tip of his nail.
Frozen, speechless, and out of breath, Lia lost herself in time, not even remembering what they’d been talking about or how they’d gotten themselves into that situation. Or how long they’d spent in that same position, sitting on her couch. 
As soon as his thumb reached her chin and he let go of her mouth, Harry batted his eyelashes, dragging the tip of his tongue in between his own lips and licking them. 
And then, still hypnotized in her mouth, he asked, “Can I kiss you?” 
Lia nodded, because it was all she trusted she could do.
And Harry sighed, dragging his hand to the back of her neck and pulling her forward. 
He leaned to meet her halfway, closing his eyes and pursing his lips before crushing their mouths together. His lips were cold and wet, and he didn’t move them against hers, just like she didn’t move hers against his. They simply remained forcefully pressed against each other, as if their mouths connecting was intense enough to freeze them both.
After a moment, Harry softened the grip on her and pulled away from her mouth. 
The sound of their lips disconnecting echoed in her apartment, vibrating into Lia’s chest and mind. Only then she took in what had just happened, and she gasped quietly, drawing a deep, audible breath in. 
Harry blinked.
“Lia, I’m—”
Cradling his cheeks, Lia leaned back in, closing her eyes and pressing her mouth against his once again. Their lips fit perfectly this time, molding around each other as she took his upper lip between hers and slightly sucked it into her mouth. Without rushing, she darted her tongue over his flesh and savored him, finally getting a taste of what she’d been craving for so long. 
Her belly fluttered as her body reacted to the minty, juicy, and warm sensation. Something she could only describe as delicious, addictive, and magnetic. 
With a gentle bite, she pulled away and blinked, letting his lip slide slowly through her teeth as she created some distance between them. When she looked at him, she found him frozen in place with closed eyes and parted lips, breathing out small puffs of air that made Lia ache for his mouth all over again. 
“What?” she whispered, brushing her thumbs over his cheeks. “What were you going to say?”
Harry fluttered his eyelashes open, but only for half a second, immediately shaking his head and going back in for a new kiss. He didn’t hold back, then, nor wasted any more time, sliding his palm down her spine and crossing both of his arms around her waist whilst dipping his tongue between her lips and searching for hers. 
And Lia gave in just as quickly and just as desperately, granting him free access as she met his tongue with her own and moved along with his body, putting both of her legs up and kneeling on the couch. 
There was a new sense of urgency between them. Their mouths moved in perfect sync, meeting over and over again for desperate kisses that erased all of her doubts and paused all of her thoughts.
His mouth was tender, and yet hungry for her. He explored her with the same curiosity, desire and need she explored him, tugging her closer whilst shifting to get closer as well. 
Her belly bubbled and swirled. Sweat dripped down her neck, and a wave of annoyance quivered through her. It was too good to be true, and yet it still wasn’t enough. She wanted more. She needed more. 
So she pulled away and broke the kiss, straightening up and moving her arms to take her damn-freaking-useless cardigan off. 
Everything happened so fast that she barely acknowledged Harry’s help, or the way he smiled at her reaction. All she noticed was how he dropped the item on the floor and didn’t miss a beat before launching himself onto her neck, spreading open-mouthed kisses while sneaking his hands under her tank-top and pressing his palms onto her back. 
Following his pace, Lia threaded her fingers through his hair and closed her eyes, relishing on his actions. Harry shifted backwards, and without even once breaking them apart, he squared his shoulders with the back of the couch and pulled Lia along, guiding her to climb on top of him. 
Lia held herself onto him and kneeled on the cushion, swinging one leg over his lap before easing her weight down and landing on his thighs. It was all he needed to be able to taste her skin with the same urgency he’d tasted her mouth. Burying his nose, parting his lips and poking his tongue out. Sinking his fingertips into her sides while shifting the brush of his scruff up to her jaw, then further down to her ear.
And then a soft, unexpected moan vibrated in the back of her throat, and Harry stopped moving.
“Damn,” he breathed into her neck, then dragged his mouth up and back to hers. “C’mere.”
He kissed her eagerly and passionately, taking his hands up to the back of her head and getting his fingers tangled with her hair. Then pulling her closer and right onto his lap.
The new pressure between her legs spurred another moan from Lia’s chest, which was quickly muffled by their twined, impatient tongues. And by the way Harry sighed into her mouth. 
He untangled his fingers from her hair and wandered both of his hands through her back, tracing roughly all of her curves before landing on her bum. He spread his hand open and gave her ass a rough squeeze, then directed her to adjust on top of him and roll just the tiniest bit on his length. 
The new friction was enough to smudge her wetness over him, and a delicious throb and shudder shot through her body. She moaned louder this time, and a low and guttural sound rasped in the back of Harry’s throat.
“Keep going,” he mumbled. “Yeah?”
With a nod, Lia placed her arms around his neck, turning her building emotions into a desperate hug before unashamedly rolling her hips once, twice, and thrice. 
Shit. 
Knowing he was getting hard was hot, but being able to feel him getting hard as she pleasured herself on it was on a whole other level. It turned every sensation into flames, and it made everything inside her combust. 
And apparently it made Harry go feral as well. Wandering his hands all over her body, capturing every inch of her. Squeezing her waist, exploring her chest, grasping her thighs, sliding to her bum and clinging to it while scooching down on the couch and guiding her to keep rocking back and forth.
Harry was in charge, there was no doubt of that. He guided their kisses skillfully — with a mix of hunger, lusciousness and softness. He moved vehemently, devouring her tenderly and yet with no mercy at all. He tasted fresh, and sweet, and powerful. Pulling away for half a second only to tilt his head to the opposite side and start all over again.  
Lia had never been kissed like that, and she already knew she would never be kissed like that again. The way he grabbed her — so tightly — and the hungry sounds in the back of his throat — so manly — made her body ache for more. Pleasure pulsed through every single one of her veins, and everything burned. Burned. And burned.
Dropping her hands down his chest, Lia tugged at the fabric of his t-shirt and helped him get rid of it. Just as easily and hurriedly as they’d gotten rid of her cardigan. And then Harry dropped both hands to the hem of her top and tugged it up, too. 
“Off?”
Lia nodded and lifted her arms, and soon the item was thrown somewhere she couldn’t see and Harry’s mouth was attached to her breast. And also his hand. With every single one of his fingers digging into her.
She sighed, and perhaps she even quietly moaned, too. 
It was just so unexpected and so… Good. 
So, so good. 
The way he sucked her in and flicked his tongue — up and down, side to side. The way he sank his teeth, meanwhile squeezed his hand around the other one. The way he pinched. Teased. Played with it. With them. With her.
“Oh God,” escaped through her mouth, and Lia bit her lip. Embarrassment quickly spread through her face, so she pressed her cheek on the top of his head and looked away. Hiding from him.
Harry let go of her with a pop and one last flick of his tongue, then crossed his arms around her back. He kissed her chest, and her shoulder, and her neck. Trailing a wet path all the way to her ear.
“You sound really nice,” he murmured. “And I’m so turned on right now… But I don’t… I don’t have a condom with me.”
Lia pulled away from the position she was in and shook her head. 
She couldn’t even remember the last time she’d bought a condom. 
“Me neither.”
She leaned in, searching for his lips and kissing him again. 
Harry kissed her back, until he twisted his fingers around her hair and yanked her away from his mouth. 
“We can’t…” he breathed out. “We can’t keep going without a condom.”
Lia blinked and looked at him. 
Harry sat underneath her. His lips were wet and swollen from so much kissing. His hair was disheveled and untamed. And his t-shirt was nowhere to be seen.
“I—I know, but…”
She slid her palms down his chest — his solid, warm, hairy chest. 
God, she was so, so needy. She couldn’t stop now. She didn’t want to stop now. She was so lost in pleasure. So lost in how he looked. How he tasted. How he sounded. How he smelled. So lost in how he made her feel, and so incredibly aware of how her deepest dreams were finally — finally — coming true. Of how much she wanted him. 
So, so lost, and so, so aware, that funnily enough she didn’t even notice when she closed her eyes and leaned her forehead against his, then held onto his neck and resumed the rolling of her hips — back and forth, back and forth.
“Can’t we just…” Lia murmured, then stopped to bite her lip and hum. 
“Jesus Christ.” He crossed his arms around her back and kissed her. “We can. Yeah. We sure can.” 
He squeezed his hands around her, constantly guiding her to keep grinding on him, and soon the entire living room was filled with their urgency. And the urgency between them was filled with pure determination. And their determination was made of hurried breathings, dizzy groans, and hot moans. And everything became so intense and so greedy that it suddenly became extremely uncoordinated, and Lia couldn’t focus on kissing him anymore, and she had absolutely no idea what she was doing with her hands anymore. 
Harry must’ve sensed her, because he was quick to crawl one hand up her spine and place it on the back of her head, entangling his fingers with her hair and keeping her face close to his. At the same time, he kept his other arm firm and secure around her waist, and made sure she wouldn’t break their closeness, nor stop the back and forth of her hips. 
Dizzy, Lia hummed another moan. She rested her forehead against his, smudging their noses together while they breathed from each other’s mouths. She blinked, and through blurry eyes watched Harry’s eyebrows pulled together, and his eyelids shut tightly. He kept his lips parted while he panted, breathlessly just like her, and then he tightened his hold on her, scooched even further down the couch, and thrusted his hips up, meeting the rolling of her hips.
His hardness stroked exactly where Lia needed him the most, and her entire body jolted. 
With a moan, she placed her hands on the back of the couch to hold herself and closed her eyes, concentrating on how incredibly good he felt between her legs. 
“Fuck,” Harry’s husky voice grunted, his hot breath hitting her mouth and cheek. “That’s… That’s it. C’mon.”
Lia felt him vibrating all over her body, and electricity blasted her senses. 
It was maddening, and agonizing. 
It was addictive, and satisfying. 
Harry’s body kept stroking and rubbing the right place between her legs, the one she needed for the bubble of tension and pleasure to grow. It spread to her lower back, her belly, her chest, her core. It caused Lia to squeeze her eyes, to furrow her brows, and to tremble. It prompted her to move faster. And also to straighten up a little, shoving her chest onto Harry’s face as she moved her hips to find the constant pressure on that exact wonderful spot she needed to finally explode. 
As soon as she found the position she was looking for, she grasped onto the couch and focused on pressing down — pressing down, down, and down, while rolling more, more, and more. 
“Fucks sake you’re so hot,” he breathed out, digging his hands into her thighs and his lips all above and around her breasts. He thrusted up to meet her again, gripping and squeezing as she lost the strength and coordination of her body. “Don’t stop. C’mon.”
“Oh my—” 
Letting her mouth fall open, Lia cried a gasped moan into the top of his head. A mix between shock, euphoria, and need. 
She shut her eyes tightly and shivered, squeezing his waist between her thighs and falling onto him while every single one of her muscles contracted and relaxed all at once. 
Frantic. 
Shattering. 
Fiery.
Pleasure rippled through her. It waved all over — from her belly, to her cheeks, to her toes. 
Everything went dark as the thrill and the fizz took over every inch of her. She didn’t want to stop, but she couldn’t help it. It had been a while since she’d been with someone, and even longer since she’d had an orgasm while being with someone, so it made sense that her feelings were so intense. Or that her exhausted body couldn’t handle the sensitivity. 
So she nuzzled on his neck and embraced the bliss, catching up her breath while he guided her to ride out the high with slow and gentle touches.
But then, Harry cursed. 
He shifted slightly underneath her, grunted, cursed again, and then apologized. 
Lia opened her eyes slowly, blinking a couple of times to focus on her surroundings. Harry’s neck was all she could see, though. Pretty, smooth, sweaty skin of his neck. The urge to kiss him was instant, so she licked her lips, snuggled closer, and pressed her mouth to the side of his throat. 
Harry squeezed her hips and thrusted up, his covered length sliding onto Lia’s front. 
“Fuck. Shit—Sorry.” He chuckled, saying the same words for what felt like the hundredth time. “Sorry, sorry, sorry.”
“S’okay…” Lia murmured, sliding her hands from his shoulders to his chest. Her lips brushed his skin as they moved, and she took the opportunity to kiss it again, and again. 
“I’m just… I’m really hard right now…” he confessed the obvious, dropping his head back and grunting to the ceiling. “Shit.”
He shifted again. As if trying to get away from the friction. Or maybe searching to get some more of it. 
Lia hummed, slithering her fingers further down his upper body while she scooched backwards on his thighs. 
As soon as she reached his high-waisted pants, Harry jolted. He circled her wrists with one hand and squeezed her hip with the other, warning with a chuckle. “Lia…”
He never stopped her, though. So she brushed her nose up and down his neck, and drifted her fingers smoothly along the black fabric.  
“What?” she whispered, then pressed a kiss right under his ear. “Want me to stop?”
“Fuck no.”
Lia smiled.
Turning her hand upside down, she covered his bulge and stroked him over his pants. Once, and twice. 
At that, Harry moaned.
The sound was so husky, so low and so manly, and yet so vulnerable and so weak at the same time, that it prompted her to repeat the movement. Again. And again. 
Even through the fabric of clothes, he felt amazing under her palm—long, thick, and firm. 
Lia could only imagine what he would look like, or even taste like. And so she asked, repeating the same question he’d breathed out earlier, “Off?”
Harry barely nodded once before he was already shifting and unbuttoning his pants, and he didn’t even have time to pull his briefs down before Lia’s hand was already working on him. Each time with more strength and confidence. Over and over. Licking her palm to make it easier. Better. Brushing around his tip. Twisting here and there. Squeezing and gripping as she moved up and down.
“Holy shit.” He bucked his hips forward, then covered her hand with his, panting heavily while guiding her touch. 
Lia hummed. Parting her lips, she pressed her mouth to his jaw, then slid her tongue to taste the scratchiness of his facial hair.
He moaned again, and then he took his free hand up, ranking his fingers through her hair and yanking her head away from where he couldn’t see her. 
“Kiss me,” he murmured, directing her face to his and drawing her in to get exactly what he wanted.
Lia’s response was immediate, losing herself with his mind-numbing, sloppy, and harsh mouth. Kissing the hell out of him while he writhed and struggled beneath her. Going along with the urgent pace of his hand and swallowing each one of his raspy curses and low rumbled moans. Whimpering along when he drove their connected hands from his base to his head, and then back to his base. Or when he squeezed her hand so they could squeeze himself together, or when he stroked further down and managed to focus on other sensitive parts of him. 
The way he tasted, the way he smelled, the way he sounded, the way he felt. Watching him, listening to him, and helping him as he crumbled beneath her with pure and raw pleasure. Everything was so powerful that she wouldn’t be surprised if it ended up leading her into another orgasm. 
And then every muscle of his body tensed as he pulsed one last time and growled with pleasure. 
Lia broke the kiss and pulled away, keeping the pace of her hand and watching the way his mouth fell open, how he furrowed his brows while shutting his eyelids tightly, and how he shuddered underneath her touch. And just like that, the mess was all over her, and him.
The sight was so intense and intimate, that it filled her heart with emotion. So Lia took her free hand to his face, cradled his cheek, and kissed him again. Capturing his bottom lip between hers, sucking it into her mouth, and pouring him with affection.
Harry hummed, closing his mouth around her upper one while slowly coming down from his own high. 
He sounded content, and relaxed. And a happy smile bursted out from Lia’s chest, inevitably breaking their kiss. 
Smiling as well, Harry leaned in to peck her mouth one more time and pulled away, collapsing onto the couch.
“Holy shit…” he chuckled, breathlessly and quietly. Only for them to hear. “Just… Just so you know… Tomorrow morning I’m going out… And getting us some bloody fucking condoms, ok?” 
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