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yuukei-yikes · 1 year

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Do you have any headcanons about Hibiya's relationships with the rest of the Dan after the series? I was always a little disappointed we didn't really get to see him interact much with anyone besides hiyori, konoha, and momo. I would have loved to see him properly integrated as a member of the group and hanging out with them 🥲

YESSSSS I'VE ACTUALLY BEEN MEANING TO DRAW HIBIYA HANGING OUT WITH EVERYONE SEPARATELY TO LIKE POINT OUT DYNAMICS but then i never did 💔 i still will at some point

hibiya is the mekakushi dan's little brother.

0. ayano's big sister radar goes off incredibly fast when meeting hibiya. she spoils the hell out of him because hibiya is largely independent and already has momo as a big sister for emotional stuff so when ayano's like WANT ME TO PATCH UP THE HOLE IN UR SHIRT hibiya's like what. i know how to do that myself. and ayano's like fine i will buy your love if i must. so she's always taking him shopping and asking if he needs anything new. he comes back every summer to the city with broken ass sandals and ayano's always sending him back with shiny new ones. he still rly enjoys having her around but he looks at her more in a motherly light than sisterly. he'd DIE before admitting it tho

1. srry to play the cooking card with kido again but. hibiya and kido cooking together :) i think kido is very impressed with hibiya's cooking and hibiya is SUPER used to being taken for granted so when they point it out to him he almost bursts into tears. i think hibiya is always looking for compliments from kido bc kido is super cool and The Leader and they kinda have a teacher's pet dynamic LMAOO hibiya is always asking kido if he can help with any chores so of course it works and he's kido's favorite student. if this was a class which is not. so he's just a rly helpful kid kido enjoys having around and hibiya loves that kido is really normal. also kidomomo. yeah. hibiya and his lesbian moms. also kido teaches hibiya how to bind. ratio

2. with seto... i remember reading this fic in ff/net back in the golden days of kagepro (so like. 10 years ago) that was like hibiya resenting seto bc he was still hurting abt hiyori and while everyone died with a loved one seto lost a DOG. i thought it was so funny bc it's so immature but seems so in character for hibiya. also in the novels when hibiya is unconscious he's taken to seto's room. i think hibiya thinks the whole dan act like fools (bc they ARE) but kind of respects and looks up to seto because hibiya is 12 and according to my intensely calculated family headcanons was raised in a toxic masculinity household so he sees this Buff Guy getting up at 5am everyday and holds more than one job for his family...he's like (nod nod nod) and he also really respects how seto refuses to use his eye power because of its. erm. unethical nature. hibiyas like UGH SETO IS SO COOL SUCH A MAN'S MAN. seto is mostly oblivious to this and always always always ruffles hibiyas hair. everyone does this but seto is the only one hibiya doesnt yell at

3. i think kano would go easy on hibiya cuz he's a kid but not entirely bc if kano isnt totally insufferable to everyone he knows at least once a day he gets sick and dies. i think kano tries to do the big sibling thing abt convincing the little brother of a total bullshit lie like basically his hobbie is gaslighting hibiya for fun. hibiya goes screaming for kido to make him stop lol. also kano's the one who's always saying shit like hibiya is 8 years old. even when hibiya's an adult kano's like how old are u again. u turned like 15 right

4. man mary tries acting SOOOO GROWN UP to hibiya she's like desperately trying to seem like a cool older sister but on purpose. with everyone else it's kind of natural but she is actively trying. momo bestie so also around a lot and sees how momo (hibiyas big sister #1) acts around him and tries doing the same and hibiya's like. this is pathetic. but still endearing and accepts it LOL he's also respectful of mary bc he's well aware of her role in their survival so he's like SIGHS okay

6. takane is everyone's demise because she introduces hibiya to smartphones and gaming. like hibiya rly wanted a smartphone right and then he makes all these friends and has to go back to the village so he takes an intensive course ran by takane abt how to use a phone. which is all good. but the thing is she is ALSO like ur so weird kid. here. play some amongus. this is how amongus hibiya can still win. everyone like vinnie hibiya cant be a fortnite kid bc he has no idea abt gaming he doesnt even have a phone WELL i got news for u buddy my fave character is takane and im also totally delusional. she is the reason hibiya is texting the gc in total typos asking if anyone wants to among us. and he's so thankful to her he expresses his gratitude thru sending her amongus and minecraft memes he finds around that she's seen a thousand times but it's rly endearing. also hibiya is shintaro coded so takane knows how to handle him sorry im so delusional abt their friendship (holds their chapter together from novel eight close to my chest)

7. eheheheheh. like i said. hibiya is shintaro coded like in canon both momo and takane say hibiya reminds them of shintaro like he's a little shin. and momo adopting hibiya means shintaro gets little brother by default too. his ass is always at HIS HOUSE!!!! i talked abt this in a post once abt how seeing hibiya and momo together makes shintaro want to try a little harder at being a big brother. i think they like each other and shintaro always lets hibiya sit in his room if momo is being too insane, and hibiya sometimes is like well shintaro's actually pretty normal!! (immediately sees him act a fool bc ofc he does) eugh. also shintaro helps hibiya with his summer hw, i think hibiya's a good student but appreciates the help and tells shintaro he thinks he'd make a rly good teacher and continues writing down on his hw all casually while shintaro has to act like he didn't get all choked up hearing that

9. i've talked abt the haruka and hibiya shitshow lol but again i love the idea of hibiya just totally refusing to acknowledge konoha's gone and keeps kicking and screaming abt it. bc if konoha is rly gone then it means he regrets everything bc he was so mean to it and its bc of it hiyori is alive (hiyori doesnt act this way bc she's well aware of it) and that SUCKS. so hibiya largely avoids haruka and isn't all that into how hiyori is really accepting of him and all. and haruka is also like. awkwardly trying to approach him because it's the least he can do in konoha's memory but hibiya's like hissing at him. eventually hibiya would accept it after a couple breakdowns. i think momo also punches some sense into him. i want hibiya to lash out at haruka and scream all sorts of things at him abt how it's not fair konoha is gone and like who even is he and just overall say all the things haruka is already super insecure about but then it ends on hibiya sobbing in his arms abt how much he misses konoha. and haruka can only hug him back and apologize :(

#ask tag #headcanons #hibiya amamiya

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iholli · 10 months

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Can we talk about Justice Lord J'onn for a moment? Because I feel like I was robbed. A Better World could've showcased how J'onn had changed due to loosing yet another person he cares for, and I frequently think about what the conversation between him and his Justice League counterpart would've been like.

Like Justice League J'onn would be so critical of him but he'd be like, "You'll be like me eventually." And that would've scared Justice League J'onn so badly IMO.

I also wish we could've seen more of how people's freedoms were taken in the Justice Lords' universe. Because something tells me Justice Lord J'onn no longer has an issue with using telepathy on those who don't accept the new regime.

YES PLEASSEEEEEEEEE. I can talk about J'onn all day and I can DEFINITELY talk about Lord J'onn omg.

YOU'RE SO RIGHT. He really didn't get enough screentime in the episode. I love love love what he got though and it says a LOT to me about his character tbh. He's very close and even kind of casual with the other Lords and he honestly seems like he doesn't want them to be on the ground [away from the Watchtower where they're protected ??? take it as you will] at least until they convince him it's necessary. He's got no problem lying to outsiders and taking advantage of their trust, and just generally going along with whatever the group decides. He reads kinda "I survived the loss of one family and I won't fail my new one [again]." to me. [this has me thinking like, what if Lord J'onn has this immense guilt bc his morals didn't allow him to read Luthor's mind without permission and that would've prevented Wally's death. SO HE DOESN'T HOLD BACK ANYMORE. fellas he makes me so sad. I make myself sad thinking about it. ow]

OH I TOTALLY AGREE, and to add, I think the conversation in Divided We Fall would be "You're already like me." [ALSO I'M STILL MAD HE'S THE ONLY ONE WE DIDN'T SEE FIGHT IN THAT SCENE.] I've got a little on this coming up in my J'onn ramble part 2 but we can see in JLU that he's already going down that road, however he knows and regrets it, he doesn't WANT to get to that point. So having that version of him that he KNOWS exists, that he's trying so desperately to keep himself from becoming, telling him he's already past that point would be a horrifying wakeup call. And I could easily believe this was a big driving force in why he ends up leaving four episodes later [he DID try to leave at the end of A Knight of Shadows sooooo 👀]. That's not going to go away especially for someone who's so intensely empathetic.

GOOOOOODDDDDDDD, I could genuinely just watch an entire DCAU series about the Justice Lords, they scratch such a specific itch in my brain and I'm so fascinated by them. I 10000000% agree with you. J'onn with no holds barred, J'onn who has lost too much, J'onn who genuinely believes it's him and his family against the world for better or for worse, he's not going to lose anyone else. LOOK AT STARCROSSED. When everything was at stake he didn't just invade Kragger's mind, he DESTROYED it. And J'onn is already incredibly impulsive as is, so if it's going to come down to the safety of his League family or the world ?? Game over. He's not even going to think twice. I actually talked about the telepathy issue in my long analysis and you are 1000% correct. In JLU J'onn already has less and less issue just taking whatever he wants from others' minds, it would genuinely only take a slight push for him to start using his powers to force people into line, so it's easy to assume this is the case for Lord J'onn. And honestly ??? League J'onn is angrier, he's more involved, he's kind of ruthless doing whatever it takes to protect his family [and only stops short because he constantly, consciously knows he has to keep himself in check. even that holds him back less and less as JLU goes on]. I think he'd be even scarier than Lord J'onn had Divided We Fall ended differently. Hell, he nearly sacrificed the world once, and that was way before he really saw the worst humanity had to offer.

or perhaps Lord J'onn was the same way at the same point in his timeline, and we just saw him after the world was already secured and he could sit back a little ?? that could explain a lot tbh. like I said, I could talk circles about him 😂

#this ask fucked me up thank you <3 #I've considered rewriting my answer like 4 times i need to put this one down now #every time i write one thing my brain branches off to 25 different related thoughts #send help #THE BRAINROT IS SO BADDDDDDD LMAO #justice lords #dcau #j'onn j'onzz #martian manhunter #j'onn my beloved #jltas #jlu #ratkingresponds #sorry if this is totally incoherent i keep going back and adding more thoughts at random #im just talking out my characterization thought process at this point 😭😭#i just keep thinking about the task force x fight when he is genuinely hurting them #he's NEVER done that kind of physical harm to a human before #and he doesn't even fucking hesitate #like dude he's already so far gone and he barely realizes it anymore #uuuuughghghghh i gotta turn my brain off LMAO

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phantom-of-the-501st · 2 years

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Din and Acceptance

I feel like there are two major things that Din has yet to fully accept, although he is already aware of them instictually.

His loyalty to the creed and the knowledge that he doesn't have to keep his face hidden.

Just how much Grogu means to him and the personal connection they have built in comparison to the role he was assigned.

The Creed

A large part of Din is still intensely loyal to the creed, but I think that there is something there that's eating away at him, and I think it's the knowledge that he doesn't necessarily have to believe what he was been taught for 30+ years. I understand his loyalty: these people saved him, kept him safe, gave him a life and a family after he lost everything. But I believe that a part of Din knows that "the way" that he was taught is not necessarily the only way.

Din has chosen to remove his helmet on more than one occasion (excluding IG-11 removing it): once to get Grogu's location and once when saying goodbye. He's broken the creed, twice.

You could argue that the first time he didn't have a choice, if he didn't do it, Grogu may have died. But the second time? Entirely a personal decision. It wasn't necessary. There's are part of Din that knows that maybe keeping his helmet on isn't the only way. He's seen that it isn't. Meeting other Mandalorians like Bo Katan has introduced him to the idea that you can still be a Mandalorian without following the ancient ways.

But Din hasn't fully clung to that. He still wants to atone, he wants forgiveness for going against what he's been taught. While he knows deep down that he doesn't need to keep his helmet on, 30+ years of being told that it is the only way is holding him back. Some of it's down to the vast amount of loyalty that Din has, but some of it is fear. This is new to him. It isn't something that he's used to. Once, he would've died for his creed but now he has broken the most scared rule on more than one occasion.

Din knows that he can remove the helmet and still identify as a Mandalorian, but there's a level of fear that's holding him back.

Grogu

It is blatantly clear how much Mando cares about Grogu, but Din never seems to outright admit what connection the two actually share.

"He means more to me than you will ever know".

Okay, Din. We know that. But why have you never entertained the idea that you view him as a son? It's always "I said I'd take you to your people, so that's what I'll do" and "he was a foundling in my care". Din never admits to having a connection to Grogu past it being the protective role that he was assigned.

He's been told that he is like Grogu's father, that Grogu himself views him as a father figure (Cara Dune even calls Grogu "his kid") and yet Din always refers to him as someone he is there to protect, that he keeps him safe because it's his job.

We know full well that Grogu means more to him than that. Din knows full well that Grogu means more to him than that. Will he admit it? No.

Din didn't have to remove his helmet to say goodbye to Grogu. It wasn't like when he needed to find where he was, Grogu would have gone with Luke with or without seeing Din's face. Taking his helmet off can't purely be explained as something that he did for someone under his protection. It's because he cares about Grogu. He's his son and he wanted to let his son say goodbye properly because he could never be entirely sure that he'd see him again.

Din went to see Grogu because he missed him. He wanted to give him the armour because he couldn't bare the thought of him being hurt. But his explanation? "He's a Mandalorian foundling, it's his right".

But there's so much more to it than that, and Din knows that. He just doesn't want to admit that he's gone soft. He doesn't view himself as a suitable parental figure and is doing everything to try and push forward the idea that it's purely a duty and not because he genuinely cares. And no-one is buying it because at the end of the day, the only person that Din is actually trying to convince is himself.

Din has been through a lot over the course of The Mandalorian and there's a lot for him to cope with. He's been put into situations he's not ready for and had what he thought he knew turned on its head. It makes sense for him to be confused and a little reluctant to change, but deep down be knows that he can.

For Din to really become comfortable, he needs to finally accept that

He doesn't need to keep the helmet on.

Grogu is his son.

It'll take some time, and that's perfectly fine. It's a lot to process. But I hope that Din can find that acceptance. He deserves it.

#the mandalorian #din djarin #grogu #mando #mando and grogu #boba fett #star wars #the book of boba fett #baby yoda #book of boba fett

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traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors · 2 years

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TW - abuse, emotional abuse, CSA, COCSA vent + looking for advice & validation. please excuse me if i missed a tag. i'm sorry that this turned out to be too long, i wanted to get this out. for context, in early 2021, i had to live with my aunt and her family when my parents divorced. her eldest son had his own mental health issues and had a hard time controlling his anger. when he tried to touch me against my consent and i stopped him, he lost his temper and started hitting me. this continued for a good 6 months or so. his parents and others always asked me to move on and forgive him since he was "still going through therapy" and kept enabling him. he also tried to rape me when i was half asleep, but i pushed him off. he beat me pretty bad for a good 1.3h then. i have pictures of the bruises and the black eyes. he'd always apologize and try to make up after but never stopped. his younger sister was the only one to somewhat look out for me and often tried to keep him away from me. his parents still try to brush this off even today. my dad was working as a single parent so wasn't able to visit often. i am very lucky to be in a school that doesn't ask us to turn on cameras. we weren't allowed to move out of the house bc of how bad covid struck my place so i was isolated more than half the time. a few friends noticed me sounding weak on a call once and that was the only time i actually was able to get help. when i had the courage to speak up, i was accused of trying to "break the family apart" and everyone around me was completely against bringing this to the police. even my dad didn't want to get into it although he genuinely cares about me but he had a lot on his plate then. he & his parents did apologize to me and we had a deal to stay away from each other and i went to live w/ my granny and dad. i wasn't able to afford therapy and still can't. my mind dipped into very dark places last year and i relied a lot on online resources. he's 18 now, i'm going to turn 18. but he's now become the pride of our family. he passed a very difficult exam and is on the way on getting into a famous college. i think he took a gap year earlier and apparently went through intensive therapy, but i'm not sure of the details. he visited earlier this week because my granny wanted to meet him. it was too much for me. although he tried his best to stay away from me, even when he so as simply asked me about how my academics were going i panicked and left. i threw up later. i feel horrible because throughout this entire ordeal i've had little to no support and i've relied on myself and friends. even now everyone's attention is on him. everybody is ignoring everything he's done in the past, even if he improved. i'm happy he's had the help he needed but i can't feel so angry. i ended up cursing him out as he left. he looked pretty sad on leaving and my grandma was upset about it altho she didn't complain. i think my feelings are getting out of control since i've been getting really sick even thinking of it these days. any advice on how i should deal with such intense emotions of hate and try to feel better? i want to let go of this and move on.

Hey there,

I'm so sorry you've gone through all of this. Please know that you deserve so much better.

It can hurt a lot when you have the courage to speak up, but then are invalidated and gaslighted. You are not responsible for keep the family together. A good, strong family does not tolerate abuse. You deserved to be supported and cared for, not brushed aside. It's okay to feel how you feel about that. You deserved so much better.

It sounds like your family just wants to sweep this under the rug. Their reaction does not mean that the abuse you endured doesn't matter. What he did to you matters and is not okay, no matter how your family reacts.

Honestly, his accomplishments don't take away his horrible, abusive behaviour. You're under no obligation to congratulate him or share in celebration with your family. His abuse of you doesn't go away just because he's doing well in school and the family is proud of him.

I'm sorry so many people are making you feel invalidated and unsupported. It's okay to be angry, frustrated, hurt, and anything else. It's okay to be disappointed in your family and angry that your family is ignoring his abusive past. It can feel like they don't care about you. But you are worthy of care, support, and understanding.

Some things that have helped me process my feelings and lessen the intensity of my emotions, especially anger, are: - Journaling. Vent, write about your day, follow prompts, and write without judgement of your feelings and thoughts. - Sensory toys, particularly squishies - Punching pillows, screaming/yelling, kicking pillows, tearing boxes apart - Calm the system down. Here are some grounding techniques. Here and here are some meditations. Here and here are breathing exercises. - Talking about it. Ideally this would be a therapist, and I encourage you to seek out a cheap or free therapist/counselor. There are sometimes programs for youth that provide this. - Let yourself think about these things, but also give yourself a break and engage in some self care.

Here is a post about the validity of anger in healing.

Expressing anger in a healthy way.

A radical acceptance worksheet for emotions.

Take care. You deserve support.

- Misa

#mod misa #trauma talks #tw csa #tw cocsa #tw abuse #tw child abuse #tw r #tw r word #r word

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masterwords · 3 years

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Silver Lining

PART TWO

Summary: Breaking up with Morgan doesn't change the fact that they have become eachother's family. We have a happy ending on the horizon, but he's very very grumpy in the interim.

Warnings: canon character death (Haley & Foyet), grief, sex

Pairings: Hotch/Morgan

Words: 4.2k

Read On AO3: Silver Lining

Notes: This fills the prompt for Comfortember Day 24 - Family. Part two of two, guys! It was too long for just a one shot but I'm not dragging it out further.

Find the rest here: Comfortember 2021

Thirty-four days pass and he can't remember a day without pain, no matter how he frames it. Maybe some days are worse than others, no scale to quantify it with but he's coming to terms with the fact that he might never feel good again, not really. Some of it is in his mind, his Bureau designated therapist assures him...something about the idea of the nature of the injury, the trauma, he's not sure he buys it but he doesn't have much choice in the matter. She says the pain stems from what he lost, not the wounds, they're just a manifestation. He barely listens, just says what she wants to hear so she'll clear him for duty, it's the only reason he shows up at all. He's become an expert at masking, compartmentalizing the pain just like everything else...he could be miserable as long as he channeled it into something useful during work hours. A direct result of all of his hard work is that at only thirty four days of medical leave, he's granted the chance to return in time to stalk onto the jet for a case. JJ would swear the cabin got ten degrees colder the minute he entered.

“Have you guys spoken?” Penelope asks, cornering Derek before he leaves with his go bag in hand. He huffs, as if he should even have to answer that.

“You think he looks like he's talking to anyone right now?” He's snappier than he needs to be, he's throwing up the same cold front Aaron is but she's sure she only sees sadness in his eyes. He was in love, you don't just turn that off. He sighs, softens, it isn't her fault, she hasn't done anything wrong. “No. Not yet.”

“Will you?”

“We have a case. I'll talk to him about the case.” It's all he can do. The way Aaron is hurting, he can see it even from a distance. He's stiff and scary, even Derek could feel the intensity radiating off of him in the form of anger at every misstep in the case. Penelope bears the brunt of it, and she's taking it in stride. After his antics in the field, an impulsive and reckless take down that was already making the rounds in water cooler talk, people are giving him a wide berth. He'd become larger than life, more myth than man at Quantico in his time away. At the BAU people began whispering about him, talking about how they were glad it wasn't them, they didn't know what they'd do if it were them...etc. It isn't fair, Derek can't help thinking it. This should have been something they shared, a burden between them both...Foyet haunted his dreams too and he had to face it alone because Aaron couldn't see it for what it was, made it all about him, refused help. Infuriatingly selfish in the worst way.

Derek sees the scars for the first time in the locker room. It isn't like he doesn't know what they look like, he'd helped change plenty of bandages but it's the first time he sees it healed up, sees the permanence in it. Aaron was dripping, a pool of water at his feet as he pulls his soaked trunks off without much care about who might be around. It's late at night, he's not worried and he'd had the pool entirely to himself. It's the only real physical activity he can do without pain right now, it makes him feel light, gives him a modicum of purpose that has nothing to do with work or Foyet. The time he spends traversing the pool is his and his alone. But Derek is getting his things together for a shower after hitting the weights and it was unexpected but not entirely unwanted. Derek takes in the sight of the scars and he bows his head, wishes he could touch them, feel them beneath his fingertips, trace each one and know it.

“Derek,” Aaron says, peering across the locker room at him as he pulls a towel out of the rack, ready for his shower. “You don't have to pretend you don't see.” He seems relaxed, focused but not so intense with his hair dripping crystalline droplets down his cheeks. He shakes his head, sprays water around his shoulders and blinks the drops from his eyelashes.

“It's not that,” Derek replies, and it's so easy. He loves this man, the conversation is natural. “I remember the hospital.”

Aaron huffs at the nonchalance and shakes his head. “Right,” he says, breezing past him, bare feet slapping wet against the tile floor. He's about to step into the shower, dismissing the conversation entirely, but he can't. Something makes him stop, turn around to face the other man.

“You want to grab a beer later?” The question rolls off his tongue so easily and surprises even him.

“Hotch...” Derek begs, toweling himself off. “I don't know...I'm not...” He's stuck, the things he wants to say are too much for the FBI locker room, he has no idea who is around the corner, who might be listening. “I'm not sure I can do just a beer.”

“Well.” He pauses, pursing his lips as he bends at the waist, a clear look of discomfort on his features while he drops his shower sandals to the floor and slips into them. “The offer stands. If you change your mind, you know where I'll be.”

He never has to say where he's going, where he'll be sitting, what he'll be drinking. If Foyet wanted to find them there it wouldn't be hard, but Aaron isn't worried about that. He's not sure why, but he's just not. “Just a beer,” Derek says, sliding into the booth but even he's certain that isn't where it ends. They've never been able to keep it to just a beer, that's how it all started in the first place.

Just a beer, and then it's a room at the artsy little hotel down the street because they're magnetized to one another, inexplicably tied together in ways that even Aaron in his insufferable determination can't sever so easily. They walk shoulder to shoulder, stay in the shadows, not drunk but definitely more than a little flush. A night spent swimming followed by beers and good conversation and suddenly he's acutely aware of everything in a different way. Aaron knows he shouldn't be drinking, he's still on blood thinners for another couple of weeks but he's been more than a little reckless already and it isn't about to stop when he's faced with something he'd been working so hard to pretend he didn't miss. The pain of missing it is too real when he can't find the place to hide it away.

“Derek,” Aaron gasps, writhing beneath Derek's weight. They're everywhere, in the bed, on the dresser, against the wall. It's desperation and loneliness, and it hurts but he doesn't hate it. He's pressing into the pain not pulling away from it. The first time that the pain feels worthwhile, like it belongs to him and he's doing something with it. He grabs Derek's hands and digs them into his sides, misses scars just barely but Derek can feel the knotty tissue beneath, the way it spreads its tendrils like roots deep inside of him. This isn't the skin he's used to but it's still beautiful, he can make it his again, he's not afraid of it.

“Sorry, did I hurt you?” he asks, trying to pull back but Aaron holds him firmly in place, won't let him go without a fight. This night won't change anything, he knows he'll have to walk away just like before but not yet.

“No,” he grunts, it's a lie but a lie he's desperate to uphold. "I'm not going to break." The pain is exquisite, and when Derek's hips thrust against him, fingers digging into scarred hips and his breath catches hard in his throat, he sees stars. His arms go weak, wobble beneath his weight and Derek can tell he's stopped breathing, pulls back.

“Aaron...”

“Don't stop...” he's desperate, he knows they should stop but they're both close enough, he'll live. It becomes his mantra, he's lived through worse. He stayed awake for Foyet. The pain is almost unbearable, so is the pleasure, Derek's arms pull tight around his waist and he pushes harder, the same way as always and it takes everything in Aaron not to pass out as his own body reaches climax. Derek holds him tight, too tight, he can't help it.

Afterward he can hardly move, shifting until he's rolled over, facing up at Derek still leaning over him he forces a smile. It's weak, even Derek can see it and he helps him upright, moves them both to the shower to clean up and he holds Aaron close as he comes down from the pain. His insides feel torn up, full and heavy. “Sorry if I hurt you...” he whispers, lips wet against Aaron's pulse, hands firm, holding him in place.

“You didn't do anything I didn't ask for,” Aaron replies, and Derek nods. It isn't exactly the lie Aaron would normally tell, it's almost like he's actually admitting to the pain that's so apparent on his features for once instead of trying to play it off like it's nothing.

“I know. All the same.”

They toss the sheets back over the bed and Derek makes an excuse to leave, he knows Aaron is already trying to get him to go so he makes it easy. Aaron looks so lonely, he almost thought he'd invite him to stay but was met with an agreement that Derek should go. He was sticking to the like that this would keep Derek safe, that he wouldn't give Foyet anything more to destroy. “You know that you're just doing the work for him,” Derek whispers, pressing their foreheads together. “I miss you.”

“Better me than him. This way, you're still alive.”

Work is less awkward after that for everyone, Aaron is still cold and cruel and taking risk after risk that he shouldn't but when he hands over Unit Chief to Derek he feels good about it. He's healing, little by little, the pain is settling and he's remembering most days to take his medications. It isn't perfect, not even close, but he's almost living even if it was under Foyet's thumb.

And then they're all listening as his heart stops beating. Foyet picks Haley, but really he picks Jack, he's just cocky, he's arrogant, he's stretching it out to make it fun for him. He knows Aaron will come, he might not make it in time to save Haley, she was just an innocent bystander and they all knew it. She didn't need to die, she was his ex-wife...it was Jack that Foyet wanted, and he'd have him just as soon as he dispatched Haley. And ultimately, once he got to Jack, he knew he'd have Aaron too...he could close this chapter and start fresh somewhere else. He was growing bored of this whole ordeal, of playing cat and mouse. Aaron didn't play by the rules, he could find someone else who would.

The fight was so fast and so violent that Aaron can't remember any of it afterward. Falling down the stairs, crashing into mirrors, breaking his wrist? He doesn't remember it. He remembers Foyet's ruined face, he remembers the gunshot, he remembers Derek's arms tight around him. The smell of Derek's breath, minty – he'd been stress eating Altoids again, he could feel the cool menthol against his skin where his lips brushed, telling him it was over, Foyet was dead. He remembers Derek's sandalwood mixed with Haley's jasmine and the metallic tang of so much blood. He remembers finding Jack and lifting him from the window seat where he'd tucked himself. He remembers feeling blood between his fingers, the shock of pain in his hand when he touched his own head, but he doesn't know how any of it happened.

And then he's holding Haley's lifeless body in his arms, he's holding her so close, and he doesn't know how to leave her. It's Derek there beside him, apologizing.

They don't force him to go to the hospital, not right away. JJ asks Will to drive him home, calls it a police escort so no one questions it but it's just a quick drop off while she keeps Jack with her. They can't be together right now. This can't be the way he is when Jack sees him for the first time in months. There are police that come to his door to ask questions, Derek is there with him as his friend...lover...boss, he's not sure where he stands in the mess they've made. As the person in charge, as the one who takes the blame. They're icing his wrist, arguing over whether he should go to the hospital when the police show up to ask their questions.

“I want to see Jack,” Aaron whispers to Derek who nods.

“When this is over,” he assures him. When the interview is over...they're allowing it to be done in his home instead of at the station, but he did just kill a man, he's got to talk. And then they'll clean him up and Jack can come, he promises. It's not much but it's what he can offer. He can't make any of it okay.

Aaron's story is full of holes, some of which can be filled in by Derek and by the recorded phone call that Penelope is sending them, the phone call Derek makes Aaron leave the room for. He doesn't need to relive it. The rest can be accounted for by adrenaline, head injury, but he never denies what he's done.

“Did you kill George Foyet?”

“Yes.”

He's forced to hand over his badge and gun to Derek, he's on suspension pending investigation the moment Strauss enters his apartment. He hates having all of these people in his home, he sees the way her eyes flicker over the place like she knew what kind of horrors had happened here but they'd all agreed it was better here than at the crime scene. The fight had covered so much of the house there were investigators canvassing every inch of it for evidence, trying to piece together a broken story. They could have quiet here. He presses his face into his hands, hisses at the pressure in his swollen and stiff wrist...he figures Derek is right, he probably does need a hospital, the bruising is starting to look more than a little like he's broken it but he won't go, not until he sees Jack.

The police leave when Derek assures them he's not a flight risk and he's not a murderer and Strauss agrees. They can't lock him up, not now. “He's a victim,” Derek urges Strauss who nods solemnly. “We don't lock up victims.” She knows, but she's still got to follow procedure and procedure dictates that his actions and the actions of the team be met with administrative review.

“You're lucky this is a personal matter and not bigger,” she squares up with Derek in the doorway. “Or this would got to Senatorial Review. We'll be as understanding as we can.”

“Yeah...” Derek rolls his eyes. “Sure.”

Pulled into the shower, Aaron is barely moving under his own power. He's lost in confused grief, nothing feels real. “Let's get you cleaned up so JJ can bring Jack by...” He's expectant that a shower will shock him out of whatever funk this is, that he'll be able to care for Jack when it's done. They start slow, Aaron is so sore, his entire body looks like it'll bruise by the end of the day and Derek isn't sure where to put his hands. Falling down the stairs, Derek recognized lathering soap along the ridges of Aaron's spine, his painful ribs. He's careful of his hand, he can see the way Aaron holds it near himself protectively, it's starting to really hurt now, the adrenaline is finally wearing off and he thinks it's a good thing.

It's not a long shower, Derek's too efficient and he's not trying to get anything else. He's cleaned up and towel dried, almost looks human if not for the mottled watercolor bruises spreading over his flesh. Derek cups his jaw with both hands, thumbs tracing the thin line of his lips, and stares hard at him.

“I think Jack should stay with JJ tonight...” he says, searching for some kind of confirmation that Aaron is even there with him at all. He briefly lights, startles out of the haze he'd been in.

“What?” he asked, frowning. “Why?”

“I think it would be better for him if he...” he paused. “Just tonight. JJ said they're having a great time, he's playing with Henry and they're going to make spaghetti for dinner and watch a movie...it's like a sleepover, man...”

Tears burn hot and Aaron blinks them away, no shame in the way they pour down his cheeks leaving blazing trails behind.

“I know you want to see him, but he's safe and she can bring him over in the morning...”

Derek sleeps on the couch while Aaron tries to get comfortable in the bed. He's not trying to overstep boundaries but he's not leaving, either. Penelope brings them breakfast in the morning, Emily brings them coffee, no one is talking about what happened they're just carefully stepping around it. Pretending they're just caring for a friend in need.

“You want to go pick up Jack?” Derek asks, and Aaron almost seems to curl in on himself. His hand throbs, fingers so swollen he can't even bend them but he still isn't willing to go to the hospital.

“He's better off with JJ,” he whispers. “He doesn't want to live here.”

“He hasn't seen you in months, that kid misses you...I know it...”

“Derek...” he's pleading, there are tears again. He can't seem to regulate that. “Not today.” He's not sure how to explain the way Jack looked at him...the first time they'd seen each other in months and there was so little recognition there, like he was a stranger. Months to a child that age might as well be a lifetime. And now he's taken away Jack's mommy and he's afraid there will be accusation there when he realizes it, when the dust settles. Resentment, anger, the kid is young but he's not stupid.

Derek calls JJ and she agrees, Jack is doing great, he's asked about his mommy a few times and she's handling it the best she can. He hasn't asked about his father, he's so used to being without him. “Another day might not be such a bad thing,” she says.

It goes on for days like that. Derek is sleeping in the bed with him now, holding him against the nightmares that won't quit. Reliving moments he couldn't remember awake. He finally convinces him to see his own doctor who casts his arm and calls him an idiot for waiting. “You're lucky you don't need surgery, it's not a bad fracture,” he says and Aaron nods, feels somehow vindicated for waiting in spite of being reprimanded.

“It wasn't that bad...” he mutters, trying to inject a little levity into their day, cradling it in his lap as Derek drives them home. Derek can only laugh.

He doesn't see Jack before the hearing, he's sleeping all the time, or preparing for the interview. He's written down everything he remembers as it comes back to him, it's splotchy and splattered in his mind, drenched in Foyet's blood. He has nightmares and wakes up sobbing but he reaches for his pen and paper to write things down before he forgets, unable to decipher between dream and reality. He asks Derek in the morning to look at it, asks if it makes sense. The entire team has been suspended pending investigation, not just Aaron. Penelope is the only one still working, she's preparing them, trying to keep the BAU functioning while they're all gone. Will and JJ have set up a special room just for Jack, not sure whether they were going to be keeping him longer...Aaron isn't Aaron, not even a little. He hadn't really seen Jack since the hospital, and neither of them seemed eager to bridge that gap yet.

The hearing doesn't take long, the team interviews are all cohesive and passionate. When Strauss finally can't take it any longer, when she can't pretend her own heart isn't breaking as she tries to look at Aaron with his cuts and bruises and dead eyes...she calls it. She'd known Haley, maybe not well but had met her plenty of times, remembered when Aaron told her that they were expecting Jack. She wasn't cold-hearted. After the hearing, he made his way on heavy legs back to the round table room, a course he'd walked thousands of times but this time felt like walking death row.

“Jack...” he whispers, more to himself than anything, because JJ is standing there with Jack nestled between she and Spencer. The boy runs to his father, wraps him in a hug. Slowly, biting back the pain of movement, he lifts Jack up into his arms, buries his face in his neck and breathes him in deep. This is what he was afraid of? This perfect sweet boy?

They went home together, and Derek followed, just to make sure. They aren't really back together, he realizes, but with Foyet gone they have no reason to avoid each other anymore and this was his family. For better or worse.

“I don't have to stay tonight if you don't want me to,” Derek says as he helps clear dinner off of the table. Aaron leans back in his chair and watches Jack wrap himself around Derek, begging him to stay.

“I want you to,” he says softly. Clearing his throat, he asks Jack to go check out his bedroom and make sure everything is ready for bed time. “I...”

“I know,” Derek says, back turned to him as he puts dishes in the sink. “We don't have to talk now.”

They let their hands do the talking for the night, and it hurts but Aaron begs for it silently. He doesn't make a sound as Derek takes him, adores him, turns flesh to fire beneath fingertips. He's worried he's hurting him, feels the scrape of Aaron's cast against him. If Aaron doesn't ask him to stop he won't. They're out of practice, rusty but it's working...there is something sacred in the silence, biting lips to make sure Jack can't hear from down the hall, bent over the bed, Aaron's face muffled in a pillow while Derek pushes his own sound deep down into his belly.

They don't talk though, not about that. Autumn gives way to winter without a word and there are Christmas lights twinkling in the streets, Bing Crosby crooning in the elevator, the scent of cinnamon and pine in every store. Aaron puts up a small tree and Jack makes all sorts of decorations at preschool but he's just limping along. Haley did Christmas, she bought the gifts and stuffed the stockings and did the Santa pictures and all of it. Haley was the source of Christmas magic, and he didn't know how to do any of it. Derek asks if he can take control, tells him to take some time off and instead of being in the apartment that holds so many awful memories, they could go to Chicago and be with his family. His mother misses Jack, he says, and it sounds so innocent in theory, but he knows it's more than that and he's not sure he knows how to do this part. The talking, the fixing. He spends most of his days just hoping it mends itself.

And then there's Fran with her big full Christmas tree sparkling, taking up half of the living room, and Derek's sisters and the lights in Chicago. Presents spill over most of the floor, so many scrawled with Jack's name on them...an entire family to love on his son here in this snow globe of a city away from home. There is more snow than Jack knows what to do with, it's high enough that they have to dig out a path for him to walk through the small yard. They decide to build a snowman with the snow they shovel from the sidewalk, just off of the stoop, cold fingers trembling inside of gloves as they pack the dense icy snow into globes and stack them one on top of the other. It crunches beneath their feet, sound echoing in the early morning. Jack digs until he finds rocks and sticks to create the snowman's face and arms, names him Frosty and stares at the wonder of their creation. “Daddy?” Jack asks, turning to look at his dad. “You cold?” Aaron hadn't realized he was shivering and he nods, bouncing in place to keep warm.

“Yeah, buddy, it's freezing out here...” he says it so nonchalant, and then Derek's arms are around his shoulders and he's whispering about putting on the coffee and how he has some ideas about how else they can warm up if that doesn't work and Aaron feels the flush spreading up his neck. Under the sunrise, it's pink and gold rays bouncing off of skyscrapers and flooding the streets, he smiles.

“We need you,” Aaron whispers, voice barely audible over the slushy traffic flying by. “I need you.”

“Aaron Hotchner...” Derek grins, shaking his head.

#aaron hotchner #derek morgan #criminal minds #mortch #hotchgan #fanfiction #hotch whump #george foyet #penelope garcia #jennifer jareau #comfortember 2021 #comfortember #friskyhotchgan

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nose235678 · 3 years

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So, I’m really late to the party on this one...

Turns out, through all this time that I’ve been putting off my writing, because I was unable to properly envision my OC’s appearances in my head, I never knew about a little website by the name of picrew.me. It has changed the game...

What the hell, right? I just went on TikTok today and saw people posting with the available character creators and I felt like an idiot for two reasons:

Because I’m a writer, not an artist. I’m too impatient to sit for that long to draw out as many characters as I need to for my main original novels or the occasional fan fiction I write to test out new OC’s personalities.

Because I grew up playing “dress-up” games like every other member of my 2000’s baby generation (I’m 20) and I never for a moment thought of trying to find a program that might be able to do my art for me for free (not that I don’t support people going to freelance artists, I intend to seek one out for book covers soon, but I just lack the budget to get portraits done for the number of characters I have).

So, what the hell is wrong with me, right?

I’ve been wasting all of this time struggling with what I couldn’t see and now...? I’m writing more than ever and I’m not confused! It’s a huge weight off my shoulders and I finally intend to share a few of my creations to show off some of the different art styles offered by the selection of character customization programs...

My first example is Persephone from my latest endeavor into writing an X-Men story.

She’s a young mutant who was born into a Jewish family with the power to control and manipulate plant life. However, this ability didn’t develop until she turned ten and ran away from the hand of a violent father and straight into the care of a marooned alien. One we all know and love, Groot who crash landed on Earth (an event that will eventually lead him to Rocket in the years to come, but for now this moment is set before X-Men: Days of Future Past. Before Magneto’s speech is given on tv and life changes for mutants forever).

With the help of her mutation, she’s able to hide Groot’s true identity as an extraterrestrial. Claiming upon her arrival to Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters that she made him by accident when her mutant-phobic father raised a bat in hand to kill the "abomination" he'd brought into the world. Not that it was entirely a lie, she could replenish and understand him through her abilities. And we all know how protective our beloved seven foot tall tree monster can be of small, mostly defenseless, screaming creatures.

As for the details of her abilities, they follow thusly:

Her canine teeth are elongated and incredibly strong along with the rest of her chompers as her mutation affects her metabolism and she needs to eat a large amount of heavy protein to maintain her strength, meaning beef, chicken, eggs, fish, etc. She identifies as a carnivore, because eating uncooked veggies can get a little awkward when she can hear the cherry tomatoes in her salad talking. Asking not to be eaten. As a result, she takes classes and puts herself in charge of planning meals/grocery shopping for the team. She’d rather die than eat unseasoned food.

Her hair grows like a weed and resembles the color to boot. Flowing in lengths of green, but it changes with the seasons. Going from lime green in the spring, to emerald in the summer, red, yellow and chestnut in the fall and in the winter...seasonal depression kicks in with a force to turn her flowing tresses black as potting soil. This however can be treated with her depression through the use of stimulants, mood stabilizers and a cubic butt-load of coffee, because just like pine trees, her internal biome loves acidic foods.

Though, because of its composition and advanced growth rate, she keeps her hair teased neatly into locs and can be often found preening herself whenever she’s not grooming every last sprout and bud in the Manor’s greenhouse where she lives with Groot to keep him company. And depending on her mood, her hair can sprout flowers based on whatever she’s feeling. Anger will sprout a crown of thorns, heartbreak grows anemones and intense love could cause whole bushels of forget-me-nots to bloom in their mesmerizing blues and violets.

And who do they bloom for? For the very first time after years of attending Xavier’s school? After being kidnapped by and defeating Apocalypse? Saving Warren/Angel’s life...? Why of course it would be one Mr. Kurt Wagner, fresh out of the circus who would take one look at her green hair with freckled, clay-colored and his blue features would go straight to purple after the fight in realizing that he wasn’t alone. There were other mutants out there in the world who looked different and Percy...? She was nothing short of her namesake. A true Spring goddess who melted the moment he wandered lost into her green house and wasn’t afraid of Groot. Even after the giant tree tossed the boy across the room like a rag doll, thinking he was attempting to sneak up on his little green-thumbed friend...

Needless to say, they would hit it off, despite a few trials given the disapproval of her new best friend, Warren who was still bitter about Kurt accidentally burning his wings during the cage fight. Though, with the new, fluffy white ones that Percy would help him grow with a special herbal brew...? After the X-Men agreed to take him in an hide him from his family...? He really had no right to complain...

And you never know...maybe one day because of them, a new generation of X-Men might come into the world...

I was able to come up with all of this story because of Picrew, so if you’re struggling like I often do, why not give it a try? It’s totally free and even fun if that’s your sorta thing. So, feel free to let me know if any of you want me to show off anymore of my OC’s sometime. I’d be happy to oblige...

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kanri-tea · 3 years

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Jakurai dies! AU (part 2)

Jakurai dies and the world keeps moving.

OR: Ichiro, Samatoki, Ramuda and Yotsutsuji in the aftermath.

The aftermath isn't pretty, but death never is. They're all still in shock, Jakurai's death still replaying in their minds even hours afterwards.

"...It's all your fault."

It's Yotsutsuji, and god, just seeing him makes them all realize that the boy has no one left. Not his parents, not sensei, not anymore. Death has claimed them all.

"I wish you had died instead." (We do too.)

Yotsutsuji takes up Jakurai's microphone. It's heartbreaking to see the microphone in his hands, too achingly familiar, yet so different.

The TDD split up. They were always meant to, but in one universe, they split on bad terms, each one at odds with another.

In this one though, their wounds are too raw, too painful. They've already lost one, what if they lost another? It's not something they want to contemplate. They make up. They communicate.

It makes all the difference in the world.

For Ichiro, losing Jakurai hurts. The man was the closest thing to a parent that he'd ever had in a long, long time.

Everything aches, but Ichiro knows he has to move on. Even if not for his own sake because he doesn't deserve it then at least for his brothers, for Jiro and Saburo. His brothers worry, but Ichiro keeps a smile on his face. They don't need to be burdened with his woes. He keeps an eye out for Yotsutsuji, because, if nothing else, he can do this much. For Jakurai's sake.

The aching doesn't go away though. The guilt doesn't fade. Ichiro helplessly mourns, unable to move on and dreams of Jakurai's death plaguing his nights.

For Samatoki, Jakurai's death brings him back to desperate times, time of helplessness. It spirals him into guilt and "what-if's."

Nemu has turned her back on him. Jakurai dies protecting him like his mother. It feels like the world is trying to tell him that he can't protect anything. He has to keep going though; time stops for no man. Samatoki can tell that his new teammates are worried, but frankly, he couldn't give a shit what the rabbit cop thought, and well, who the hell knows what Rio is thinking? He keeps an eye on Yotsutsuji - it's the least he can do.

His mind keeps going back to that day. The memories prey on him, the gunshots haunt him, and shadows of Jakurai are at every turn. Samatoki isn't sure he knows how to keep going anymore.

For Ramuda, it's like his heart has been torn out and ripped to shreds. While he and Jakurai might not've been lovers, not exactly, there was something there, something intense.

He turns his back on the Chuuoku. Somehow, he manages to run away. It's difficult at first, medicine not being a commodity and government agents and clones at every turn, but he manages. Surprising, it's Amayado that gets him a way out. Ramuda is free, and he forms Fling Posse. He has to keep walking, because Jakurai is dead and he can't keep living his life wallowing in misery. He keeps an eye on Yotsutsuji though, because Jakurai cared so much for him, and Ramuda could do this much, at the very least.

The memories haunt him. Every wisp of purple reminds him of the kind man. Ramuda doesn't think he could ever love anyone as much, not again. The guilt, the pain, and the heartbreak is overwhelming and Ramuda isn't sure if he can keep on walking.

"Would you care to join me in changing the world?"

Yotsutsuji smiles. It's a small one, one that shows no teeth and exudes kindness.

It's the same one that sensei used to have, the one that he practices everyday.

Everything hurts now. It's hard to get up in the morning knowing that he'd have to face another day without the kind doctor.

In front of him are Kannonzaka Doppo and Izanami Hifumi. Jakurai would've found them interesting, Yotsutsuji thinks fondly.

The Division Rap Battles are approaching, and without a shadow of a doubt, the others will be there too. Just the thought of them infuriates him.

They'll pay, he thinks, for killing sensei. For killing my family.

In the distant corner of his mind though, he knows they're not at fault. That Jakurai wouldn't have wanted him to blame them. But it's so much easier to lay the blame at their feet, to think that they caused his death and not Jakurai choosing to die for them.

Excerpt from a letter to Amaguni Hitoya from Jinguji Jakurai, post-mortem.

Hitoya-kun, if you're reading this, I suppose that means I'm dead. I wish I could've seen you once more, but fate, it seems, had other plans.

I should get the point, shouldn't I? You never did like pointless dallying.

I'm sorry.

I can't really tell you what I'm sorry for or why, but I am.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I've done to make you leave. For you to completely sever communication.

I... I know I'm not a good person. I wish I could've been better. But what I must've done must have been really bad for you to leave entirely.

You might not think the same anymore, but I really do love you. You were my best friend meant a lot to me.

You really are amazing. I heard about that trial, the one with the mob boss. You did so well.

I wish I could've told you in person.

I hope you'll forgive me one day, but it's fine if you don't. I don't deserve it.

With love,

Sincerely,

Jinguji Jakurai

#hypnosis mic #jinguji jakurai #jakurai dies! au #yamada ichiro #aohitsugi samatoki #amemura ramuda #yotsutsuji kannabi #amaguni hitoya #angst #TDD

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ty-talks-comics · 4 years

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Best of DC: Week of January 1st, 2019

Best of this Week: The Flash #85 - Joshua Williamson, Christian Duce, Luis Guerrero and Steve Wands

Amidst everything going on in the DC Universe right now from Year of the Villain to the end of Doomsday Clock, there’s been a lot of really underrated books that DC’s been publishing and Flash Definitely falls into that category for me. Of course, Flash is no low-tier character, but as it stands, there’s not a big conversation surrounding Joshua Williamson’s run with the character like there is for the up and down runs of Batman and Superman, but there should be!

Joshua Williamson and his revolving art team of Christian Duce, Scott Kolins, Rafa Sandoval and Carmine di Giandomenico have pulled off some of the most consistently fantastic Flash storytelling in recent years. From the Speed Force Storm to Flash’s “Final Showdown” with Captain Cold and finally here with Rogues’ Reign, these stories have only seen Flash become an even better character with depth after he’s been tested over and over with insurmountable odds and overpowered enemies while still being riddled with doubt.

This issue of Flash acts as the penultimate issue to the Rogues’ Reign storyline and sees us learning a bit more about some of the Rogues as individuals while at the same time, breaking them apart even further. This book is less centered on the various speedsters, but more around their lack of control over their powers and Flash continuing his rivalry with King Cold to the bitterest end.

The book begins with four panels of King Cold, Leonard Snart, monologuing to himself. We get a great big focus of the Symbol of Doom in the sky as Snart says that it’s the end of the world, but at least he’s going out like a winner, unlike his loser of a father. One of the many defining characteristics of Cold up to this point and in other stories has been his hatred of his father and his aversion to become anything like him. However, he’s become nothing more than a self-fulfilling prophecy because his life is nothing more than misery because of the sacrifices he made to get to where he is.

Cold helped Luthor’s ascension and the rise of Doom by accepting Luthor’s Gift and allowing himself and his Rogues to become ultra powered, but in doing so, has alienated himself from his friends and family now that they all have what they want. Duce frames all of this excellently by first placing Cold in shadow before he looks at his glasses, as if reminiscing about his old life before putting them on and looking towards his death at the end of the world.

Soon after, we cut to Kid Flash and Avery receiving training from two unlikely sources; Heatwave and Weather Wizard. Though they were seen as reporting in to King Cold a few issues ago, it was brief and mostly to air some small grievances that they had with the way that Cold was running things. Here, we get the reveal that they’d been working with Golden Glider since she broke off from her brother and Mirror Master under their noses. In a brilliant double page spread by Duce and Guererro, we see that they’ve been helping the speedsters keep their speed under control.

It’s a pretty warmhearted scene followed by more where Gold Glider comforts Flash about their presence. Williamson makes Heatwave and Weather Wizard come off as two men that have suffered hardships in their lives, leading them to the life of crime, but still managing to have hearts. Glider tells Flash how Weather Wizard wanted to escape the life of crime that his family was involved in when he was a kid, but never could which lead to him hurting people he loved. Heatwave suffers similarly from his pyromania being the reason his parents died, but it’s painted more as him having a sickness he can’t control. Glider tells Flash that they want to stop Cold so that things can go back to the way that they were.

Duce draws these scenes with a surprising intimacy. Amidst all of the intense action, Duce draws Heatwave with a sense of pride as he watches Kid Flash control his speed better, Weather Wizard stare in his lonesome because of everything going on and shows the kids eating with their teachers after a long day. On top of all of this, Flash has a nice scene where Golden Glider teaches him how to ice skate after he asks her to get back into what was one her hobby. Guererro colors all of these scenes with warm tones, even in the ice which is primarily blue and white. Flash and Glider’s colors give off something of a happy feeling.

One of the recurring themes of this run has been relating to the Rogues in meaningful ways and Williamson does an excellent job here of contrasting all of them to an amazing degree.

After Flash makes a bad joke to Golden Glider, causing her to become morose, Weather Wizard steps in and tells them that they’ve found where Mirror Master has been hiding and the entire crew go to find the last two pieces of his great mirror. Kid Flash asks Golden Glider if she used to date him and she confirms this, stating that she didn’t know why, but that she knew all of his tricks.

Mirror Master has always been one of the Rogues of lesser renown because well… he's an idiot. Only in the sense that he's never used his powers to a degree where people needed to be afraid of him, but thanks to his upgrade they need to. In actuality, his access to an entire Mirror Dimension makes him one of the most dangerous people in the DC Universe as a potential spy or thief because A LOT OF SURFACES REFLECT. Flash and the other Rogues learn this the hard way when Mirror Master springs a trap on them, revealing that he knew that Glider and the others betrayed Cold.

When the Rogues and Speedsters finally encountered Mirror Master, he looks absolutely devious with a wide grin and his wide grin as they did everything they could to stop him. Duce’s poses were dynamic and captured how intense the fight was, the furious facial expressions were very well done and crystalline backgrounds were beautiful. Guerrero’s colors stood out in how distinct each of them were. Mirror Master’s glossy white clashed with the other characters, especially Flash’s vibrant reds and Weather Wizard’s dark greens. By easily besting all of them, he showed just how dangerous he could be.

He teleports them all to the King and Snart notes how disappointed he is and how the Rogues could have ruled the world together. This causes Glider to snap at him, saying that he never told the Rogues what that would entail - the end of the world under Luthor. At this point Captain Cold is so far gone that he just doesn't care anymore and Williamson has been leading him down this path since the beginning.

In Rogues Reloaded, Cold had the idea for the Rogues to get one more heist over on The Flash before retiring completely and that was foiled with all of the Rogues being defeated. In Welcome to Iron Heights, Snart decided he'd run an operation from prison but Barry Allen and his former ally, Godspeed foiled that plan too. Because Cold had murdered another inmate to throw off the scent, this led to a fist fight between Cold and Flash which saw Cold's defeat and transfer to Belle Reve Penitentiary. Obviously the defeat had an adverse effect on Cold because he was so sure that he would overcome, but didn’t. He lost again.

Captain Cold has always been one to hold family in high regard since he's never quite had a functioning one side from the Rogues, so his time on the Suicide Squad was devastating to him. I mentioned in past Flash reviews that watching teammates die mission after mission must have done something to his psyche and Lex Luthor took advantage of that when offering him and his actual friends a way to win against The Flash. All of that led to this.

King Cold, feeling betrayed and pissed off, freezes his former friends and sister, leaving only The Flash to fight him one on one again. In their last fight, Cold wanted it to be one on one without any powers, but he lost that fight because of Flash’s iron will. As he removes his cold weather clothes, he reveals that Luthor’s Gift wasn’t just improved gear, but it was a supercharge of power implanted into him. Their final face off will be hand to hand with powers.

This final shot is absolutely poster worthy. Duce conveys the rage emanating from both of them with jaws wide as if they were yelling at each other. Fists are cocked back, ready to pummel their opponent into the ground, especially Cold as he has frozen his arms up to the elbow for maximum impact. What makes this even better is the Symbol of Doom hanging over them in the background like a terrible omen. Guerrero manages o make so many colors fit together in a brilliant display. Flash and his signature red and bright yellow makes him look heroic, the underdog in a fight shrouded in dark greens and cold greys. Cold is paler, his normally blonde hair turned completely white and his arms as blue as his cold blood.

I absolutely loved this.

Duce and Guerrero killed the art in this issue. On the scale of Flash artists for me, Duce is high up there. They manage to blend high intensity action with nice character moments to get the reader invested in character’s emotional states through visuals. Guerrero accentuates this by coloring scenes so that they fit each individual mood and can blend these all together when there’s a clash of ideology or character. Of course, Steve Wands is the glue that holds all of this together his letters are perfectly placed, distinct for each character and give every situation the proper weight to individual lines.

The Flash is an underrated hit that everyone should be reading, especially in regards to the Flash/Captain Cold saga. Their rivalry has been a grand center point on the level of Batman and Bane’s right now or Superman and good storytelling (zing!) I can only wonder where things go from here and what will happen to Captain Cold after this because this is probably the highest he’s ever flown, so how will he fall?

#the flash #barry allen #captain cold #leonard snart #golden glider #year of the villain #dc comics #comics #joshua williamson #christian duce #luis guerrero

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smileyoongle · 5 years

Text

Mafia BTS! A woman like her (Maknae Line)

Here's the maknae line. Requested by @zamanladysi Finally I completed this request. Hope you enjoy this.

Park Jimin:

Jimin lay on the coarse floor of the cell. Just recently, he had been arrested and beaten up to the point where he didn't think he'd live any longer. Someone from his gang had betrayed him. He had many connections within the police department too, but a new officer had caused great distress to everyone. Jimin's back hurt from all the times he had been hurt by a whip. He had been here for a week and soon he was gonna be executed. His entire body was on fire, but he couldn't do anything. His mouth was parched and he was starving. He wished that his suffering would just end, he didn't even wanna live anymore.

Suddenly, the commotion was heard outside of the cell, gunshots and screams filling the entire building. Jimin slowly turned his head to the bars of the cell, seeing officers running around. With all his strength, he propped himself on his elbows and settled with his back against a wall. All of a sudden, everything fell silent. Jimin's breathing was becoming heavy, he was fighting to stay conscious. Just then, the sound of footsteps was heard from the corridor outside. A figure came to a halt beside Jimin's cell. Jimin's eyes clenched shut when he saw the gun in the mysterious person's hand. This was it. Someone probably wanted to kill him for revenge. Two loud gunshots and a creak of the door being opened echoed through the place. Jimin slowly opened his eyes to see a masked person approaching him. The black hooded person knelt in front of Jimin and gasped at his condition. His eyes started drooping. Slowly reaching his hand out, Jimin pulled the mask away from the stranger's face.

He frowned deeply upon seeing you. A girl whose face showed concern for The Park Jimin, someone who mercilessly took people's lives. "Wh-who..." Jimin croaked, coughing right after. You took off your bag and pulled out a bottle of water. You were completely aware of how he had been staying in the jail cell for the past week so you came prepared. With shivering hands, you opened the cap of the bottle and placed it near Jimin's mouth. As soon as the water met his tongue, Jimin's thirst increased. After downing the entire bottle, he felt a tiny bit better. But he was still close to fainting. "Stay with me till I get you out of here, yeah?" You whispered, ready to hoist him up. "Y/N, we should leave!" Your accomplice warned from outside. "Who are you?" Jimin asked in a better voice as you helped him stand up. "Consider me your angel for now." You answered, leading him out of the building. With a grunt, you managed to shoot down a guard and keep a hold of Jimin at the same time.

"We'll talk about the 'not so angelic' parts later."

Kim Taehyung:

You inhaled deeply as you stared at your tied hands. The harsh rope was digging into your skin but that wasn't the problem. The problem was the man who was standing infront of you, eyeing you like he was about to devour you.

"You thought you're so slick, but baby, I run a mafia for a reason." You flinched when his hand reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. You looked at him straight in the eyes, giving him your best glare. "I know you've been sent to spy on me. So tell me, what have you found out, Miss Y/L/N?" He asked, moving to sit on the chair in front of you. You had been very confident that you were gonna make it out alive. But all that went out the window when Kim Taehyung had captured you, somehow being aware of your presence around him. "Oh don't worry, Mr Kim. Apart from the fact that you're a pathetic and an atrocious bastard who hurts people for no reason, I only know about all your connections and illegal deals with people around the city." You smiled at him sarcastically. He tilted his head to give you an amusing look and let out a chuckle. He stood up from the chair and knelt down to meet your eyes. "People usually don't talk to me that way because they know I'd kill them in a heartbeat." He said in a very serious tone. It almost scared you but you were prepared for this. You were probably gonna die, so why not be a little brave? Suddenly, he smiled and grabbed the back of your neck, pulling you to him. Your breathing hitched as you tried to pull away but his hold was firm and tight.

"But I like your attitude. So maybe I'll just have to keep you here with me, doll." He mumbled, his gaze falling to your lips. Your nose brushed against his as you hurried to cut the ropes, discreetly. "You might have to rethink that." You suggested, making Taehyung frown. Your lips broke into a smirk, only adding to his confusion. But soon enough, everything became clear when he felt a sharp object pushing into his abdomen. His eyes widened and he fell back in pain. You stood up, rubbing your wrists while Taehyung tried to take out the small knife which was dug deep into his skin. His men were ready to shoot you when Taehyung yelled, "Alive. I want her alive!" You shook your head at him. He really shouldn't have said that. You quickly grabbed two smoke grenades, throwing it towards the guards. They really should've checked you before tying you up. They threw themselves down on the floor, thinking it was an explosive one. Taehyung managed to pull out the knife, tossing it to the side. But he couldn't understand why a small knife had caused him to become so weak and drowsy. You ran towards the exit, turning back one last time to look at the currently helpless gangster. You smirked as you saw him trying to reach for his gun while glaring at you intensely. He was burning with desire to kill you, but at the same time, he wanted you in ways he never wanted someone before. "The knife was laced with a fatal poison, Mr Kim. If you happen to live, then I'll see you behind bars. But if not, then adiós!" You informed him as you opened the door to leave. Taehyung clenched his jaw as he took one clear look at you. He wasn't gonna die without getting you back. His breathing became heavy as pain shot through his chest.

"Doesn't matter where you go. I will have you surrender every inch of you to me."

Jeon Jungkook:

Jungkook entered the lavish cabin with anger evident in his eyes. Two of his men had been killed by a rival and he wasn't gonna sit quietly. He had been hearing about this gang for a while now, but he never thought they would dare to mess with him. His men followed behind as he stood in front of a huge table, across which sat someone, their back facing the small mob. Jungkook had murder on his mind but as soon as the chair turned, it was replaced with shock. Everything was the same, those eyes he adored, the long hair he loved messing with and the lips he always wanted to kiss. But the difference was the smile on those lips, which once used to be innocent and now it was far from innocent. "Missed me?" Your honeyed voice was messing with his heart again. He stood still, contemplating what to say because seeing you was the last thing he expected. His men were surprised to see him so speechless. Gathering his voice, he finally spoke. "Y/N, what are you doing here?" He frowned, taking in your appearance. Black had never been your colour but now it was the only thing Jungkook saw on you. "Aw, don't tell me you don't know. I am the one who killed your two favourite pets, Jungkook. And I can't wait to see more heads roll." You grinned, warning him of what you planned on doing. Jungkook's heart ached, listening to you say those words. His Y/N was kind and thoughtful but you were merciless. And he knew it was his doing. "Why are you doing this? This isn't like you, Y/N!" He slammed his hand on the table, making everyone flinch, except you. Your smile disappeared as you saw his frustration. You stood up from the chair and made your way to him. Everytime you looked at him, all you could think of was the day you had seen him kill your father with his own hands. The boy who was your best friend since childhood had murdered your only family in front of your eyes. "You are asking me why I am doing this. Oh come on, Jungkook. You don't want me to answer that, do you?" You narrowed your eyes at him, tilting your head to see his face. There was once a time when you loved this handsome face but now you felt nothing but hatred for him. You moved closer to him and wrapped your arms around his neck, placing your mouth next to his ear. Tears were pricking your eyes but you didn't care. He deserved to see what he did to you. "And the Y/N you're talking about? I don't think you'll ever see her again because I kinda killed her." You whispered, tears already staining your cheeks. Jungkook wanted to hold you and scream at you for saying such nonsense. But he lost the right to do that. If his Y/N really wasn't here anymore then it was because of him. You wiped your tears harshly and left the cabin as you pushed past Jungkook, leaving him hurt. Your men quietly followed you outside. At that moment, Jungkook felt the most empty he had ever been. He truly lost the girl he was in love with and he never even got a chance to say it out loud. He leaned against the table as he covered his face with his hands. He felt the wetness on his cheeks cover his palms. He had to get you back, no matter what, he had to tell you why everything ended the way it did. And you had to listen.

"I need you and I need to be needed by you."

I can't believe I wrote this in one day. Tell me how it is. I really lack motivation. But I hope you all liked it. Also, jungkook's ended up being too long. I don't know what I am doing.

- XX

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shawnpetermuffins · 5 years

Text

Were you going to tell me?

A/N: this is my first fan fiction on here, so I'd love some feedback if you have any! Also, I'm writing this on my phone, so it probably has a bunch of typos.

Summary: y/n and Shawn have been together for 7 years, but y/n isn't so sure he still wants to be. (This is a really bad summary, wow. Sorry lol)

Warnings: some swearing. Angst and lots of it.

Word count: it's a lot sorry

***

Seven years. Five of which I was in school. (The unfortunate fact of getting into a long distance relationship during my senior year of high school and continuing through college.) Four of which he has been all about touring, and working at the studio, and doing promo. And two of which I have been living with him. Two birthdays and two anniversaries have gone forgotten - by him, I might add. I've never forgotten an anniversary or birthday. I'm good at remembering dates, especially with people that I love. And despite this, I have been completely invested in our relationship.

He's never home anymore. I'm always here cleaning our - his - condo, which used to feel big, but now it feels like I can't take a single step without being in his personal space. That is when he bothers to be home for more than an hour at a time and I'm not at work. He doesn't even notice anymore. It's like he just expects it now. Dinner is always in the fridge for him to heat up because he's never home in time to sit down with each other and eat like a normal couple would. And of course this also means that our sex life is pretty much nonexistent. It's not that I don't want to because that is definitely not the case, but every time I try to get him in bed he always says hes tired or "not now, y/n. I have to get this done." "I'm about to leave." "The boys are on their way."

We've gotten to this point in our relationship that I never thought we'd be at. I never thought he'd become disinterested in me, in us. He really doesn't even pay attention to anything I do or say anymore. So I high key doubted that he was going to notice when I didn't come home for a few days, weeks maybe. It's not like he texts or calls me to see where I am now.

I was throwing in a few more pairs of panties when the front door closed. He was home early. I panicked for a second, debated on whether or not I should I hide the suitcase, but I shook my head and zipped it, set it next to my nightstand. I went to the bathroom to grab my makeup and toothbrush.

“Y/n?” He said from the door to our room. I already wanted to burst into tears, but I couldn't. Not in front of him. He couldn't see how much I was hurting. I walked back into the room, “Hi,” I said softly, but I didn't dare look his way.

“What are you doing? Why is the suitcase out?”

I sighed and didn't answer for a while, trying to find the right words. “I’m going home for a while.”

“Home? You are home. What are you talking about?” He stepped farther into the room.

This was killing me because this was probably the longest conversation we've had in months. “No, Shawn. I'm going home. To y/h/t.” I finally looked up at him. He looked tired, so tired and I just wanted to put him to bed and have him rest for a few days, but I knew better than to say anything to him about how hard he was working himself. We've had that fight before. He thought I was having him choose between me and his work. I would never. (Because I know he'd choose work.)

“What?” He closed the distance between us, grabbing my elbows. This is the closest we've been in a while and it took everything in me not to melt into him. “Were you going to tell me?”

“Shawn,” I pulled away from him and tossed my bathroom bag on the bed.

“What? Is that not a fair question?” He was getting angry, that was obvious. “Why are you leaving?”

“Because I have to.”

“Were you going to tell me?” He asked again.

“Honestly? No. I didn't even think you'd notice.” I crossed my arms over my chest.

“What the fuck are you-?” He threw his hands up. “Of course I would notice!”

“When? Huh? When there wasn't dinner for you in the fridge?”

“Y/N, where is this coming - what did I do?”

“I'm tired, Shawn.” I rubbed my temples.

“Why are you leaving?!” His voice rose, and if I hadn't heard him like this time and time again in the past year and half, I would probably be scared.

“Because I want to go home! Because I can't just sit here anymore!”

He crossed his arms, eyes wide. “This is your home! This is our home!”

“No,” I shook my head, letting out a bitter laugh. “It's not.”

“Yes it is.”

“Shawn, this doesn't feel like home. This condo is not my home! You would understand if you bothered to pay attention to anything I say anymore.”

“I do pay attention!” He said defensively.

“No, you don't! For four years all you've thought about was yourself and your career. You never ask me about me and mine. Which, by the way is pretty much nonexistent since I moved here.”

“So, it's my fault that you don't have a career? Don't you put that on me, y/n! You know I work hard to put this roof over your head and make sure the utilities and anything else you need is paid for.”

“I don't ask you to do that! And I'd pay for it if you would let me! It's not like you're here to use the utilities anyway.”

"What is your fucking problem?! Why are you doing this?!"

"Because I'm tired! I'm tired of being overlooked. I'm tired of everyone asking me how you are and how we are and having to lie to them. I'm tired of going to bed by myself and waking up the same way. I'm tired and I want to go home."

"Why didn't you tell me any of this?"

"I tried! You never listen. It's always 'I have an early day tomorrow, can we talk about this later?' Or 'I can't do this right now.' Or 'the boys are coming over, let's put a pin in it.'"

"You still haven't said why you're really going."

"I miss my family, Shawn! I miss my friends! I haven't seen them in two years and you don't care because it has nothing to do with you or your career!"

"Of course I care! How dare you say I don't?"

"How dare I?! How dare you?! You can't just come in here and act like you suddenly give a shit about what I'm doing! You haven't so much as looked my way in months, but now that I have a suitcase out, now you want to act like you care. That's bullshit and you know it."

"You can't just leave!"

"Yes, actually. I can. Because even though you feel like you do, you don't own me. I can make my own decisions. In fact, I've been doing a lot on my own recently."

"You're being ridiculous," he said with a scoff and an eye roll.

"I don't really think I am," I tugged at the ends of my hair. "I have a right to see my family. Even if I have to fly across the entire fucking continent to do so."

"Y/N-"

"Do you know how much I've given up for you?" I cut him off.

"Excuse me?"

"I moved to Canada for you. I left the only place I've ever known just because you asked me to. I left my friends and family. I left my job. I left my home to be with you in yours. Notice how I say this, Shawn. I'm in your home. Not ours. Yours. It's absolute fucking shit that I have had to give up everything I've ever known just to make you happy and you've never once said thank you. You don't act like you appreciate me. Half the time you act like I'm not fucking here. But I am, Shawn! I'm here and every night I make you dinner and I make sure the place is clean and your laundry is done. I do everything for you and you can't so much as look at me when I try to tell you about my shitty day or to say 'thank you for dinner, pumpkin' when you're coming to bed." I took in a shuddery breath, but didn't take my eyes off him. "I can't even remember the last time you kissed me goodbye when you were leaving in the morning. Or the last time you woke me up in the middle of the night because you thought of a new chord progression that you need a second opinion on. I don't remember the last time we made love to each other. Now, I don't know why you wanted me here, but I'm sick and tired of playing the role of the forgotten housewife. I'm absolutely fucking done!"

"What does that mean? Done. Done with what?"

"Us!" I said without realizing what was coming out of my mouth.

"Baby!" He reached for my hands again, his eyes practically popping out of his head. "I'm sorry! Okay? I know. I know I've been fucking up a lot lately-"

"You forgot our anniversary. And my birthday. Twice!"

"I said I was sorry about that. You know I was-"

"Working on the album. Yes, I know. I forgave you because you were under so much stress. But I'm stressed too, you know?" I pulled my hands away from him, wrapped my arms around my middle. "I'm here in a place that I still don't know that well. I don't have a single friend here that isnt your sister or one of the guys. And no matter what, they would tell you if I was feeling neglected or sad. But they shouldn't have to tell you! You should just know because we've been together for seven goddamn years and you know me better than anyone. You should know I'm not feeling well." I took in a deep breath before continuing. "But you don't. You don't notice that I've lost weight because I've been under so much stress that I can barely keep any food down. You don't notice that I clean this house spotless at least twice a week because I have nothing else to do, or that your laundry is always washed and put up. You don't notice anything I do for you and it hurts! I've given up everything in my life just to be with you and you. Don't. Care. That fucking hurts, Shawn! It hurts that you haven't realized that I'm not happy anymore!"

He flinched like I'd hit him. "You've never said that to me before," his intense gaze dropped to the floor.

I've never said it out loud before either and I felt just how powerful and hurtful those words acfually were. Not only for him, but for me. It hurt me to say that to him. To see his face after I said it. "Look," I said, guard down, defeated. "I'm going back to y/h/t for a little bit. I just - I need to get away from this for a while."

"Do you know when you're coming back?" He reached for my hand again and played with my fingers, swirled the promise ring he gave me six years ago that, even through all this, I've never taken off.

I shook my head. "No."

That's when he started to cry and I knew I had to get going before I changed my mind. "I need to do this, Shawn. I think it'll be best for the both of us. We need to figure out if this relationship is really what we want. If it's still worth the fight."

"I want you, y/n. I've never wanted anyone else the way I want you. Please." He took my right hand and rested it on his cheek, locking it there with his own hand. "Please stay. I'll be better. I'll work less. I'll make you feel as loved as you should be. I'll do anything you want me to. Just please," he begged again, his voice cracking. "I'll be lost without you. I can't- I can't lose you."

I sighed and kissed his temple, retracting my hands from his once again. "I have to go," I grabbed my bags.

He followed me out to the car, tears still streaking his face. I put my bags in the trunk and checked my purse to make sure I had my passport and ticket. Then I closed the trunk and stood face to face with my broken boy.

"Can I kiss you? Is that allowed?"

I nodded. I wanted more than anything for him to kiss me and never stop. I wanted this kiss go be enough to make me forget all that's fallen apart between us. Forget all the pain I've suffered watching him live his dream while I put mine on hold and stay in this house that isn't home, even when he isn't coming home and he can't send me something as miniscule as a text to tell me so.

But this lips still felt so good against mine. Like they were made to connect to my lips. His tongue wrestling with mine was heaven. To taste him again after so long without him felt surreal, and that's when I started crying because how could we be so terribly fucking broken and still be able to share a kiss like this? How could he still make my stomach do backflips when his fingers combed through my hair?

And how could it still not be enough?

"I love you," he pulled back, his forehead creasing as he fought back more tears.

I wanted to say it too. Wanted to put him at ease, but I'd been crumbling in that place for months upon months and some part of me, no matter how small, wanted him go hurt the way I have. Leave him wondering like he's left me. So I got in the car because the kiss, his words, they weren't enough.

***

So that's the end of that. Let me know if you want a part 2 I guess!

#shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes #shawn peter raul #shawn mendes angst

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