#hence snack double meaning

[jesncin]

Butch checks out the local gerobak to get a tasty snacc

[transmutationisms]

I don't necessarily disagree with your take on David Lynch but I feel like at least part of Twin Peaks is about deconstructing or questioning the myth of the idyllic small town, like everyone in Twin Peaks has a dark secret, most of the men were abusing or complicit in abusing a teenage girl, etc. and the Return to me is about showing that it's kind of fundamentally impossible to return to that glamorized nostalgic past. I could totally be missing something though.

wow ok this was my most controversial david lynch statement yet... so first of all i disagree that there's any tension between the kind of conservative nostalgia i see in lynch's work, and the idea that the past is impossible to return to. in fact i think that kind of lament is pretty central to quite a lot of reactionary rhetoric: it's that emotional appeal of, look what we've lost / damaged / destroyed forever. it doesn't need to be a coherent political platform because it's an appeal on the grounds of pathos.

anyway if i can just quote from my own post lol:

i simply cannot read the series in any way besides as being deeply conservative lol. this becomes especially clear to me in 'the return’, which is largely motivated by a narrative of the loss of american innocence (the double r subplot, the numerous instances of drugs and violence tearing nuclear families apart, the encroachment of electricity and processed snack foods and gambling, &c). but this viewpoint is seeded too throughout the first season-and-change of the original series, and fwwm; because what was laura palmer if not the series’s first use of rape as metonymous for what lynch sees as a broader process of social breakdown and irreversible change? i understand that some people try to read bob and laura as a critique of the family, in the sense that the violence comes through the father, but i don’t think this reading holds even in the original series and it certainly doesn’t after part 8 of 'the return’, in which bob is explicitly and directly invoked in reference to the bombing of hiroshima and nagasaki, here construed as an originary act of american evil.

i think in david lynch’s mind, the spiritual forces and influences in the show are literal and apolitical, and frequently he seems to mean to depict them more as sources of artistic inspiration than anything else ('twin peaks’ is in many ways a tv show about making a tv show, hence the double use of electricity throughout 'the return’ and fwwm, in particular). but i find this really irritating frankly, because it’s at best ignorant of the inherently political nature of the constructions of small-town americana, teenage innocence, violence as an act of moral corruption, and so forth—and also because, after the return, it’s simply impossible to deny that the show’s overarching narrative IS plugged in to political and historical lines of critique. like, i am not trying to 'force’ a reading that deals with us imperialism—lynch put the show on this discursive terrain explicitly and deliberately, through not just the bomb footage and the penderecki threnody but also the inversion of classic symbols of american 'greatness’ (the unlucky penny, the evil lincoln impersonator), culminating again in the violation of a young girl’s body by the forces of evil. what this all adds up to is the invocation of american empire as a kind of universal moral struggle, stripped of its historical specificity or even the barest pretense of material critique or commentary. if it sounds like i’m asking too much of network television… i mean, maybe i am, but again, these were deliberate choices lynch made and specific historical events he invoked on purpose, lol. see also the jacoby trump commentary in 'the return’ (cringe and yawn).

i’m not a lynch scholar but i do think there’s a tension throughout his work (what i’ve seen) between the desire to make art about what he sees as the purely spiritual process of making art (heavily informed by his own TM beliefs), and the conservative elements that creep in anyway, noticeable especially in his commentary on american history, corruption, modernity, &c. the idea of any pure, transcendent, apolitical spiritual dimension of human existence is itself, i would argue, at best a misguided conservative fantasy, and 'twin peaks’ ultimately shows these cracks more blatantly than some of his other work (say, 'inland empire’) because it tries to subordinate the material to the spiritual in a kind of fantastical historical parable. but, you can see this recurring tension throughout his filmography, eg, the loss of small-town innocence ('blue velvet’) and a kind of generalised modernity anxiety ('eraserhead’, though taken on its own this one would permit other readings depending on how you interpreted the role of german expressionism in it).

i don’t think lynch is an ideologue or even considers himself particularly political, but nevertheless his narratives do idealise a certain conservative vision of post-war america, mourn its loss, and wax nostalgic for its perceived ethos (& it’s not a coincidence lynch is/has been a reaganite, lol). anyway, i thought 'twin peaks’ had some really incredible moments of visual artistry (part 8 of 'the return’, for example!) and i found much of it frankly beautiful and compelling to watch. so, i don’t mean any of this to dismiss lynch as a filmmaker—he is, if nothing else, highly technically adept.

[pollen-warden]

Place: A farm on Gatlin Fields Time: Present time With: @pollen-warden & @debauchfairy Summary: When Vishal arrives at the party held by a childhood friend and neighbor, he doesn't expect to run once again into Kieran. The faun decides to be a menace but his plan takes a wrong turn.

Colder days had meant that he had perfectly good excuses to stay home by the fire. Colder days had meant that his social life was reduced to his family, the customers they had on the farm or the farmer’s market, and his guinea pig, who did not respect his sleep schedule but served as a remarkable conversational buddy. 

But they were well into spring and Vishal was out of excuses. It wasn’t like this was going to be awful. His neighbors, who had taken over their parents’ dairy farm, were people he had grown up with, and he actually looked forward to seeing them. They were perfectly normal people too, and thanks to their proximity with the Vishals, they had barely suffered from Wicked’s Rest harsh realities. They were absolutely unaware of that, obviously, but Vishal didn’t mind. If they had been doing this for fame and money, he probably wouldn’t have done it at all anyway. 

And yet, tonight, he could feel a prickling running along the surface of his forearms, crawling up his spine like a shiver. Somewhere among the guests, there was a monster, lurking, waiting, and, Vishal was sure of it, about to make a victim out of an innocent human being. 

—--

Kieran wasn’t a snob per say. Did he like the finer things in life? Yes, why wouldn’t he. Did that mean that he wouldn’t attend a cozy little cottage-core soiree if invited? Of course not. Besides, it was almost a given that he’d be the best dressed guest which was always a fun and coveted title. The hostess wouldn’t look too bad, though, seeing as Kieran had been the one to dress her, hence this adorable invitation. Truly, an innovative young woman, making sure to have someone of Kieran’s caliber at this little get together. 

Granted, after the first round of snacks and drinks, his interest had definitely dwindled. There was only so much small talk you could make about the town and businesses and dairy farming. Just as he’d made the decision to finish his fresh drink and bounce, the back of a familiar head caught his attention and instantly revved up a cure for the blossoming boredom. 

“Now, isn’t this a hoot,” Kieran sighed, sidling up beside the warden with a self satisfied grin on his face, sipping from the champagne flute and letting out a content sigh. 

—--

Even if he had tried his best not to appear irritated upon hearing that voice in particular, Vishal knew he would have never managed to save appearances. It was no surprise, then, that the warden’s usually blank features felt more somber now. 

He slipped his hands in his pockets, grateful then for his sobriety. It was probably for the best that no one saw him clench his fists, although he was too polite, in the first place, to cause any sort of scene tonight. He liked his neighbors, and he knew of the importance of being on good speaking terms with the rest of the community. “I didn’t expect this to be your scene,” he commented. You would expect to find his kind at those sorts of happy gatherings, of course. There was music playing, people drinking more than they should have, and of course, people would get excited. He didn’t get it, but understood that even though this all felt strange and unlikely, it was unlikely that anyone would pretend to have a good time for so long. Vishal, who could definitely not manage to smile now, gave the other a look. That fucking smug piece of shit. How many times had he failed to get rid of that goat. 

—-

The smugness of his grin only doubled when he saw the warden bristle, dark eyes glistening with barely contained glee. This was the calmest circumstance he’d found himself in with the man, every other rendezvous distinctly more tense and focused on murder. It wasn’t personal, just another headstrong hunter filling their holy mission or whatever the fuck and unlucky for Kieran, he kept running into the guy. More lucky, he also kept escaping him. 

“I am a man of many interests,” Kieran replied matter-of-factly, amusement oh-so obvious in his voice. “You almost dress up nice,” he added, taking in what was probably supposed to be an attempt at a formal outfit. The withering glare earned the warden a wink and an air kiss and Kieran really was having a wonderful time. Sure, the smart thing would have been to make his exit unnoticed but this was just too good. 

“So, still set on trying to stab me simply for existing?” he asked casually, still facing the crowd of the party but attention fully on the warden. Just in case. Kieran was certain he wouldn’t cause a scene, not with this many normies hanging around, but life was always full of uncertainties.

—

 “Everyone has many interests. I still didn’t expect this to be your scene,” Vishal retorted. His dull gaze was lost in the campfire set up further away. He wouldn't go after that animal tonight. There were too many people around them, and most of them were people he had in high esteem. It was preferable, for the common good, that the eradication of the fae was done out of sight. One of the primary missions of his family, long before the use of force against these monsters, was to guarantee the safety of men. That meant keeping them in the dark. 

“Aren’t you charming,” the warden replied.  Compliments, coming from the fae, were only meant to draw a thank you out of their victim’s lips. Vishal must have been 3 or 4 years old when he was first told that very simple truth and it had never left his mind. Of course, his teachers found him odd when he refused to say thanks, but since he was generally a good kid and student, they tended to let it go. The same had been true for his sister. She had been a good kid, and grown into a good person. If only they hadn’t chosen to trust monsters, she’d have been here with him tonight, and together, they’d have gotten rid of this one with ease. 

“Yes.” Vishal looked at him then. He didn’t have to justify what he did. He knew it was the right thing to do, and he certainly was not going to let him persuade him that it wasn’t. “Though stabbing is imprecise,” it came with yet another chance at surviving that Vishal was growing tired of. 

–

Kieran shrugged carelessly, finishing off his drink yet now having no intentions of actually leaving. “That’s just because you haven’t taken the time to get to know me, darling,” he sighed, ridding himself off his glass and picking up a mini-quiche instead, enjoying it like his current company wasn’t someone who wanted him dead so bad. “Which is really your loss, I’m even more fun when you get to know me.” The grin was permanently in place now, even as he licked off his fingers and accepted the warden’s dry remarks. 

“I like to think I am, yeah.” Charm that obviously had no effect on the warden whatsoever but that didn’t stop Kieran from reaching out the metaphorical tendrils, pushing at what he knew was an impressive resolve against his hypnosis. Just because he knew the warden would feel it and it would piss him off. And boy was he pissed off, dark eyes shooting daggers his way. It did little to dampen Kieran’s mood, giddy with the chance of a bit of payback, petty and insignificant as it was. 

His head cocked to the side, genuine curiosity mingling in with the schadenfreude of this moment. “Oh? Please, do tell me what I have to look forward to next time we meet.” Before the warden could answer his question, or more realistically, not provide an answer, the host and second best dressed person here fluttered up to the unlikely duo. 

“Vishal! How lovely that my last minute guest already seems to know someone here.” She beamed at Kieran who smiled back, finally in possession (though not literally) of the man’s name. Not that he would do much with that knowledge except have it and know that Vishal most likely loathed the fact. 

Without hesitation, Kieran had an arm wrapped around the warden’s shoulders, giving them a small squeeze. “Such a happy coincidence,” he chuckled, for a moment blissfully unaware of the possibility that information on anyone else might come to light during this conversation. 

—

“I have this feeling that knowing you would only make your situation a lot worse,” which was Vishal’s courteous way of letting his old pal here know that nothing could possibly save his life, and certainly not becoming well acquainted with the hunter. He had no doubt that the faun had a life outside of driving humans straight to a place where they couldn’t return from, but that didn’t alter reality. In the end, that guy was a monster and there was nothing he could do to change that. 

“And here I thought your kind was good at reading between the lines,” the warden finally allowed himself to take a sip of apple cider. It wouldn’t do him much but perhaps the taste alone would reconcile his mood with a happier state of mind. 

He was about to let him know that he couldn’t spoil the surprise like that, but their host interrupted them then and he had to refrain from cringing. His crispation was hardly discrete however, even as he found it in himself to respond. “Well, he was just about to give me his name,” and just like that, his shoulders dropped and his hand returned to his pocket, a rare, smug smile appearing on his lips as if to dare him to deny him this much. It needn’t be said that he wasn’t delighted at the idea of being on a first name basis with him, but fate had decided that this would be the norm for tonight. 

He regretted wearing long sleeves now, this much was for sure, but he wondered if, though he couldn’t feel the iron prickling on his skin, the faun could tell how tense he was now, or how brutal the sensation of having fae nearby had grown just then.

—

That… was probably the truth. Whether by luck or shoddy work on the warden’s end, each previous meet up had been by coincidence. Kieran wasn’t being actively hunted by this man, not yet, and things would probably be easier if they stayed that way. Of course, he didn’t share any of that with the hunter. “You, my dear, have a very negative outlook on life.” 

Negative outlook or not, Vishal did manage to seem pleased with himself at his choice of words, clearly picked in mockery and honestly, kudos. Even if Kieran blanched for a fraction of a second, mouth open in mild shock before the easy grin returned, he doubted their hostess had noticed. The warden definitely would have. “This guy,” he scolded playfully, giving the very tense shoulders under his arm a friendly shake. Wondering if there was a way to slip out of this that didn’t involve the physical pain of lying. “You know it’s very rude, making people repeat themselves just because of a shoddy memory.” A blanket statement, one not applicable to their current situation but not a lie. 

“Oh, go easy on him, dear,” the hostess chided before turning to the hunter. “Don’t mind Kieran, he’s actually a sweetheart. Helped me find this dress, spent a good hour just making sure we found the right thing.” Yeah, Kieran’s face definitely twitched that time - his name was one thing but she was awfully close to revealing his line of work as well. His arm relinquished Vishal as Kieran instead moved closer to Miss Blabbermouth, with the pretense of fixing the collar of her dress (it was fine) in order to shut her up. 

“And you’re an absolute vision. Now, you may be hosting but it is a travesty that you don’t have a drink. Come along.” Not giving her room to argue, Kieran led her away from the warden, sparing a glance back over his shoulder. Fine, maybe initiating contact had been a bad idea. 

—

Much like today, Vish had always run into the guy at the bend of a path, so to speak. One moment, he was enjoying either a stroll in the countryside, washing his hands in the bathroom of a bar or even buying a bloody danish, the next, he either cursed himself for not being swift enough, hesitating just enough for a third party to put an end to the ball, or simply running out of luck. 

And here they went again, running into one another in a place that just would not let Vishal do his job. And yet, this time, perhaps he wouldn’t go home empty ended. Eyes full of warmth welcomed their host’s words : perks of being neighbors with people you’d grown up with. That certainly gave one the upper hand. “That’s alright Val, I have thick skin, don’t I,” and Vishal, who didn’t know a thing about fashion, and quite frankly didn’t have time to care too much about it either, actually took the time to look at her. She looked good, this much was true, but he was the sort of person that didn’t pay much attention to these things, so perhaps that was lost on him. “Is that so?” He began. 

The faun didn’t give him the satisfaction of winning this one too, but the smile Vishal bore as Kieran turned around and looked back at him was one of a world champion. Not so clever now, hmm? But now that he knew that there was a faun among the guests, the warden also knew that he’d have to stick around to make sure nothing happened to anyone. If that meant suffering in the other’s company some more, so be it. Like he said, getting acquainted could only be bad news for dear Kieran.

He gave him a head start, a sliver of hope but never got him out of his sight. At the first sign of nonsense (any seasoned warden was familiar with the term fae nonsense because it was quite remarkably applicable to their brand of chaos), he would be there. But a couple minutes passed, without the faun attempting anything. Vishal, who never walked out of his house without a few blades on his person, wondered if tonight was not going to be another one of those stab the water moments, another missed opportunity. Valerie chose this moment to leave her stylist behind, and of course, he had to make sure the poor thing didn’t suffer for too long. “Miss me?” 

—

Oh, the warden was much too pleased. The tables had turned far too quickly for Kieran’s liking and he was suddenly very aware of every exit’s location. Damn it. Even if his friend Vishal couldn’t fully know that Kieran didn’t have a disposition for offense (at least not in the literal fighting sense), there was the unspoken fact that the fae’s information was much more valuable. And Kieran had walked right into that, hadn’t he? 

Making small talk with Val was torture, his mind on the warden who, every time Kieran checked, was still watching. Motherfucker. “I really hope you’re enjoying yourself, it’s the least I can do for all your help,” she prattled on and Kieran’s smile, to its credit, stayed perfectly plastered on. “You sure know how to throw them,” was the best he could manage, aside from straight up telling her that he was currently having a bad time and that her friend was a murderer. 

Suddenly, someone else caught her attention, leaving Kieran stranded next to the drinks table but not for long. He exhaled heavily through his nose as the warden sidled up, smile still in place but speaking volumes of sarcasm now. “Obsessed much? It’s not a good look, sweetheart,” Kieran spoke around the rim of his glass, even though more champagne was perhaps not the brightest idea. Add it to the fucking list, I guess. “How do you think I’m going to slip away this time, then?”

—

“You really spent an hour picking a dress for her?” Vishal didn’t want to know what the price tag was for such thorough service. He couldn’t imagine spending a full hour in a shop either. Most of his purchases were tried on at home and since he had had the same figure for the past 10 years or so, he rarely made a mistake. This being said, his shirts were always a bit too big for him which is why he often wore them open, and his trousers a bit too short, the hem falling barely below the ankle. 

If he had taken note of the other’s potential job, the word sweetheart was something that certainly was bound to slip out of his ears right away. “I wouldn’t say obsessed. Thorough, perhaps. It’s important to know who you are dealing with, isn’t it?” His eyes flickered to Valerie’s brother, who passed by and gave him a pat on the arm, as a sign of acknowledgment. Must have been some sort of shock for him to finally see the Kumar son out of his brooding. Perhaps it was a bit weird, seeing a smile on his face after so many months without even the trace of a simple grin… It really didn’t take much to bring him back to those thoughts, did it? 

“This time? I suppose you’ll wait for me to leave,” which meant this was precisely what Vishal planned on doing too. “You do know I’ll ask her where she bought her dress,” he added, with a less amused tone, this time. He was all for having a nice time, in different circumstances, but under no condition was he going to allow for the other to get chummy with him. “And if something happens to her, I won’t be pleased,” so if Kieran had any sense of preservation, this would be his ticket out for today : a promise that nothing would happen to their hosts.

—-

Kieran raised an eyebrow, as if that was the strangest thing one could do and not, say, spend your life running around and playing with knives. “I’m meticulous,” he replied simply, careful with the information he gave out, even if it most likely wouldn’t matter in the end. Crucial knowledge had already been leaked. His eyes narrowed slightly as Vishal continued, making his intentions of finding out more very clear and wasn’t that just great. An easy smile instantly replaced his frustration as another guest walked up - it would have been hard to fully grasp the tension between the two looking from the outside. 

His smile fell the second they were left alone, weight shifting as he continued to mask his growing discomfort. Yeah, that had indeed been the idea. Leaving now would definitely mean getting followed. “Any chance you’re getting tired?” Kieran asked, downing the rest of his flute because why the hell not - he was in for the long haul anyway. Of course he’d ask Val, that possibility had already registered in his mind. Now all he needed to do was make sure Val didn’t have that information to give since Vishal definitely wouldn’t be falling for any of his tricks. “Really? I don’t think it’s your color but who knows, maybe you’ll pull it off.”

His expression shifted into one of distaste at the prospect of harming Valerie. It wasn’t like his heart would bleed if something happened to her but he had no intention of ruining her life, either. There had been… instances, accidents even, but Kieran didn’t get a kick out draining people. “I’m not planning on hurting her. Or anyone,” he deadpanned, turning his head so that the warden could fully grasp the truth of his statement. Not that it would matter nor that Kieran cared what this mindless hunter thought of him. 

—

The warden, with a chortle, shook his head. Well that was a rather silly question to ask. Not that he couldn’t get tired. He was able to spend a whole afternoon in the hammock on his best, or worst days. Falling asleep, or feeling sleepy when his entire being was warning him of fae being around, was however not something he believed he could do. Like some kind of adrenaline rush, that was bound to keep him alert. 

If he caught the air on the faun’s face at his unkind suggestion, Vishal was not precisely thinking much of it. These people always felt like what they did was normal, natural. They always felt like humans were beneath them. There was a chance he felt insulted at being denied a proper meal for all he knew. That sounded more likely than outrage at the idea of harming someone innocent. “Now’s not the time to give me that look,” these folks could never be trusted, and he had lost enough trusting monsters. “You’re going to promise you’re not going to hurt or endanger her life in any way.” In which case, the warden would agree to leave earlier than he initially had planned to, offering the faun a sizable chance to escape.

—

Of course the possibility of a hunter forming their own, informed opinion was ridiculous. Now’s not the time, he said, as if there would ever be a time where Kieran would be allowed to make his case for not being brutally murdered. But apparently, there was some possibility of bargaining. “Is that so?” he scoffed, not because he had a problem with that specific promise - the plan was to stay as far away from that woman as possible now that he knew the kind of company she kept - but the idea of being strong armed into a bind by a warden of all people…

“You gonna leave me be if I do?” he pushed, even if he knew the answer beforehand. Vishal could deny being obsessive until he turned blue in the face but Kieran wasn’t naive enough to think a warden would simply let a fae slide by. Maybe it would mean safe passage for tonight, at least give Kieran time to untangle the mess made by the stupid urge to toy with a warden. 

—

“Are you under the impression that you have a choice?” The hunter seemed more than amicable right now, with all these people around, but he didn’t need much more than the iron in his body to cause the other pain and Kieran must have known by now that if there was something Vishal wouldn’t hesitate to do if given the opportunity, it was to hurt him. “For someone immortal, you don’t seem to understand patience very much,” he commented next. “I can wait til tomorrow to get my hands on you, somewhere without a dozen witnesses. You can try to hide, I suppose. That could be fun,” it would not be fun. Vishal didn’t like to play games with fae even if he often ended up doing so (very much against his will). 

“I won’t harm you til tomorrow at 6am,” he paused again, this time to look him in the eyes. He won’t promise him anything. Unlike fae, he didn’t need that to be true to his word. Their use of trickery to get their way told you all you needed to know about them. “If that works for you, then I’ll be on my way home in a few.” But no amount of good behavior would buy the faun much more time. 

—-

Another scoff, this one filled with even more disdain, laced with years of gathered offense at things like wardens and empathy and cotton blends. Of course he had a choice. Granted, the options to choose from weren’t the most fabulous but it was a fucking choice all the same. No one, human, warden or fae, told him what to do. “Instant gratification is much more pleasurable.” Well, maybe not for Kieran in this particular case, the gratification being his death but whatever. 

Despite all of it, he couldn’t help the amusement at that dry delivery. Vishal would most assuredly not find that fun. The faun had to wonder if the man found anything fun. “Tomorrow, huh? I’ll have to check my schedule,” he said with disinterest, raising one hand to focus on his fingernails as if they weren’t discussing future plans of mutilation. Being obtuse was the only card he currently held. 

Head barely turned, Kieran spared the warden but a second of eye contact before taking a step away from him, straightening his jacket. “Fine. You have my word that I won’t endanger or harm Valerie.” Making sure that Vishal wouldn’t catch even a glimpse of the discomfort felt by the bind, Kieran kept his focus on the woman in question. “I do, however, need to go top off her glass, because I’m charming and an absolute delight.” 

And without sparing a second glance, Kieran sauntered off, all smiles and the perfect image of someone totally not making sure a certain someone took their leave. He’d stay for now, probably even try to find some company for tonight in case the warden decided to go back on his word, so there would at least be a witness. Most importantly, Kieran would make tonight’s hostess promise to never share the secret of her dress - it didn’t harm her but it just might put the smallest of dents into grumpy old Vishal’s plan. 

[bluekittyworld]

There is Karma [Chapter 2]

Masterlist

Chapter 1, Chapter 3

It had been a few days since your volunteering, you were in group chat with the rest of the volunteers, you clicked on Yoongi’s picture and added his number to your contacts. You have been seriously considering messaging him, but you don’t want to seem crazy, and if you do message him, what will you even say? Things are getting busy at work as the fiscal year is coming to an end, you decide it’s best not to say anything for now. 

Ding

You heard your phone, but you were in an online meeting with your stakeholders from Japan, you couldn’t check your phone immediately.

Ding

Ding

Ding

Ding

You were curious who was sending you all these messages, nobody messaged you like this. The meeting had another 5 minutes, you thanked God that the Japanese were strict on time, meaning this meeting will actually end in 5 minutes.

Finally, you had the chance to check your phone.

You have been added to a group chat.

You saw that Sora had made a separate group chat from the main chat, with you, Yoongi, Yeonjun and herself.

Sora: So guys, I made this chat, maybe we can volunteer again as a team, there’s many opportunities posted on the main chat, let me know if anything interests anyone

‘Yeonjun Set the name of the group chat to Dream Team ☆’

Yoongi: Sure.

Yeonjun: How about we all volunteer at the Hope orphanage this coming Sunday?

Nobody had responded, Sunday was one of your free days.

You: Yes, sounds great, what time?

Yeonjun: Awesome, 11:30am

Yeonjun: Sora? Yoongi?

You could see double blue ticks on your message, Yoongi had read it, why wasn’t he replying, you were starting to feel a little anxious, hoping he would agree.

Sora: Yes, I’ll see you guys there!!! Sooo excited!!

You felt a little relaxed, your new friend Sora will be there at least, you reacted with a thumbs up on her message and put your phone down to focus on your work.

 A few hours had passed, it was almost 6pm, you normally left work around 6:30pm, since you were feeling a little peckish you decided to leave a little earlier, to grab something to eat before you called it a day.

You opened the group chat, still no response from Yoongi. Just then as on cue:

Yoongi: I am busy in the morning, but I can join at 12:30pm.

A smile plastered your face as you were exiting your office building.

Finally it was D-day, you’ll get to see Yoongi today. You got dressed in mid-length pale pink pleated skirt, a white shirt, white trainers and a pale pink cardigan, it was a little chilly today. You did your hair and makeup, then messaged Sora that you are on your way.

When you arrived, Sora was already in the parking lot.

“_____! You’re here! Yeonjun is going to be little late, we’ll go first?”

You exchanged your greetings, it was nice to always see Sora being cheerful, you never really had friend like her, she was sweet, kind, and genuine. On the contrary, you were never genuine, you didn’t care about others in the past, you used to be self-centred hence having no friendships for many years until you met Sora.

You were preparing a snacks table for the children; Sora was decorating the room with bunting and balloons.

“Do you like Yoongi?” she asked out of the blue.

You almost chocked on air, eyes wide, like a deer caught in headlights. Sora chuckled at your reaction, wiggling her eyebrows, expecting an answer.

“Umm, I do find him interesting, is it that obvious?” you tamely asked.

She laughed, “Of course not, I just had a feeling, I specifically made the group chat to bring you guys closer, you guys look so cute together, even Yeonjun thinks the same!”

You were flabbergasted and giddy at the same time, unable to contain your smile.

Sora patted your back and winked, “I’ll be your cupid, don’t you worry _____.”

It was now 12pm Yeonjun had just arrived and got to work, he kept the children entertained with his storytelling, as you and Sora made some final touches.

It was 12:20pm, you heard the door open and saw Yoongi walk in, instinctively you smiled and waved at him, he smiled back with a wink, making your heart skip a beat.

Yeonjun’s story had ended, the children were quietly sat in the library room, Yoongi asked them to follow his instruction, and surprisingly they were listening, he led them to the room where you and Sora had prepared the snacks and decorations. It was heart-warming to see them smile jumping around in excitement. They enjoyed the snacks as the 4 of you and the 2 caretakers helped to serve snack and drinks to them. After the children were done, some of them had made a little mess, Yoongi swiftly grabbed tissues and wet wipes, cleaning them, you joined in to help.

It was nice spending the afternoon with the children, you could see that multiple times Yeonjun and Sora purposely put you and Yoongi together to complete tasks, not that you minded, it was just so funny that being adults they were still pulling the high school tricks, nevertheless you were thankful as you got to learn more about Yoongi.

Yoongi liked oranges, his favourite perfume scent was bergamot, and he owned a chain of cafes under his family’s business ‘Min Corperation’, you were aware of the business but just never had the chance to work with them in the past. 

Your week started off boring, it was 2pm, you decided to message Yoongi. It’s not weird to ask him out for a coffee, he does have a chain of cafes… you pull out your phone.

Hello Yoongi, would you be free…

No, it was too formal, you erased the text.

Hey Yoongi, would you be up for coffee sometime this week?

Sent.

Your heart was beating a little faster and harder, you anxiously stared at your text, it seemed fine but why were your ears burning up, you reluctantly put down your phone, screen facing down. It’s not like Yoongi will reply straight away.

You tried to focus on your work, you had to win this contract you’ve been working on for weeks, you had to prove to your father that you were worthy of taking on his company, not your half-brother Kim Taehyung.

Taehyung your older half-brother, the golden child of your stepmother, of course he would be because he was her own blood and flesh. Whereas you were a side product of your father’s extramarital affair. Your stepmother made it clear from day one she disliked you; your father was absent for the most of your childhood, you had various nannies who took care of you over the years until you were capable of taking care of yourself. You had sworn to impress your father and outshine Kim Taehyung, the bane of your existence.

Buzz buzz.

You raised your head and looked at your phone, it was ringing, it was Yoongi!

You picked up “Hello?”

“Hey ____ how are you?”

“Good, you?”

“Good good, I was wondering instead of going out, would you like to help me out with something?”

Your heart at this point was racing, you’re sure he could hear it through the phone.

“You still there?” Yoongi asked, showing a hint of concern.

“Yes, I’m here, sorry, help you with what?”

“I have new coffee roast blends, they just arrived today, I need to pick out the best one, for our winter toffee lattes, help me decide the which one to sell?”

“Of course, I’d love to!” you exclaimed, you internally slapped yourself, you sounded like you were five.

Yoongi chuckled, “Great I’ll text you my address be there for 7 yeah?”

“Yup see ya at 7” you quickly hung up and grabbed your water bottle.

Woah that was more difficult than trying to negotiate with your clients. It was 4:30pm, you decided to leave at 5pm, get dressed and leave your apartment by 6, to be at Yoongi’s place by 7pm.

Your door flew open, and walked in Kim Taehyung, why did he have to be here to ruin your mood.

“Dad want’s analysis done on the future potential partnerships, do it by the end of tonight.”

He threw the file of papers on your desk.

“No.”

Taehyung turned back to look at you with disgust.

“What do you mean, no? How dare you, you filthy little b-”

“Taehyung, I said no, I can’t do this plus it’s your side of the business” you cut him off.

He walked over to you, placing both his hand on your desk and lowering himself to your sitting level.

“Okay, I was going to tell you a little secret after you did this as a reward, so you wouldn’t be too shocked my dear little sister.” He looked soullessly into your eyes.

You were starting to feel anxious and fidgety, Taehyung never had good news.

“Fine I’ll do for Friday if you tell me what secret” you bargained.

“No-uh has to be done tonight.”

“Tae I really can’t do it for tonight”.

“It’s Taehyung for you, not just Tae, and fine, do it by tomorrow afternoon.”

“Fine. Tell me the secret first!”

“Work first”

“I will do it, I promise, can’t you just let me know?”

He was enjoying this a lot; you could see how he was trying to hide his smirk.

 “Dad is getting you married to his best friend and business partners one and only son, Park Jimin.”

You were too shocked to even respond, how could your father do this to you, he knew what sort of a person Jimin was, everyone did.

“Bye sister!” Taehyung yelled as he slammed your door shut.

It was almost 5, Yoongi, that’s right, you had to leave to meet Yoongi on time, you can worry about Jimin later, for all you know this could be one of Taehyung’s sick pranks.

Chapter 3

[thiswasinevitableid]

Late Shift (Danbrey)

The winner of the "creatures and people" prompt poll was: A vampire who works the night shift at a gas station

Anywhere else, Dani would get in serious trouble for adding fresh herbs to the donut case offerings at four-thirty am. 

Amnesty Lodge, with its attached gas station, does things a little differently.  For starters, the head cook at the Lodge restaurant refuses to let them sell the standard gas station snacks without adding a few of his own into the mix. Hence the fairly fresh batch of doughnuts that he dropped off fifteen minutes ago. Dani’s basil plant has been growing even wilder this year, and she worked out that a sprinkle of basil makes the lemon filled donuts–even the ones Barclay doesn’t make–taste a million times better. 

At least, that’s what customers tell them. Dani hasn’t eaten a donut since 1964. 

Even when Stokers Famous Tonic became mainstream, allowing vampires to eat human food without getting violently ill, it’s not always cheap to get your hands on. And Dani likes to save hers for the fresh fruit from the garden, or when Barclay wants a recipe tester or Mama invites her for an early-morning cup of tea. 

Or, if she plays her cards right, dinner with her favorite regular.

The door opens and the object of her dinner plans walks in, with far more energy than most humans have in the darkness of the morning. 

“Hi Dani!” Aubrey waves. She’s brightened the flame-orange streak in her hair since Friday, making the black curls around it shine like a raven in the sun. 

“Hi” Dani is relieved, not for the first time, that she can no longer blush, as Aubrey bends over to grab a Double Shot Oatmilk Monster Energy Coffee. She’s in her stage outfit, black dress jacket with studs sewn on the shoulders, and shorts and white dress shirt that look like someone ripped the arms and legs from a tuxedo. 

Aubrey looks over her shoulder with a smile and Dani pretends to find a spot on the counter to clean with her nail. 

“Just the usual please, if you’ve got it” The magician sets the drink on the counter. Dani grabs a waffle sandwich from the warming station; eggs, cheese, and hot sauce on a slightly sweet waffle, the kind Barclay makes in huge batches and then freezes. 

“We do. Did you just get back from a show?”

“Nope” Aubrey leans on the counter, allowing Dani to see the bra peeking through the dress shirt, “heading to one. They booked me for a big brunch show at some country club in Huntington but they want me there, like, super duper early. Oh, wait, do you have baby carrots today?” 

“Ummm” Dani glances at the chilled food display, “nope. Shipments are still kind of weird. Sorry.”

“Dr. Harris Bonkers will live without them. I’ve got other stuff to bribe him with to stay calm in the car.” She takes her change, but doesn’t move her hand right away. Instead she adds, “But you’re gonna owe him nose pets the next time he comes in.”

“I can handle that. Break a leg at the show.”

“Always do.” Aubrey gives her a wink and heads out into the parking lot, leaving her to rest her chin in her hands and sigh at the candy display.

—----------------------------------------------------------------

Aubrey’s totally going to do it. She’s going to ask Dani out when she stops for gas today. She’s made this promise to herself every day for the last two weeks, but gosh-darnit today she means it. 

Dr. Harris Bonkers, PhD, runs circles around her feet as she swipes on black lipstick and stamps on her eyeliner. 

“Just a sec buddy, I’m almost done.”

A honk in reply. 

“Look, if I had my way I’d spend all day petting you, but I need to get groceries and you’re not allowed in Leo’s after the banana incident.” She crouches down pets the rabbit’s nose, “but you’re coming with me tonight even though we don’t have a show. I’m gonna need emotional support for this. You gonna be my wingman?”

She moves her hand back a half-inch, and he immediately bumps it with his nose.

“Thanks doctor, knew I could count on you.”

—-----------------------------------------------------------------

Dani is dumping blood orange syrup into the slushee machine when Aubrey walks in. The magician makes a bee-line for drinks, Dr. Harris Bonkers hopping behind her. The white rabbit is close to the size of a Corgi, sporting his black harness with flames on the sides as his claws click on the tile. 

Technically he’s not supposed to be in here, but Mama has never booted him when she’s spotted him inside the Lodge or the restaurant, and Dani figures people who are stopping for gas at eleven at night have more on their minds than complaining about a fluffy bunny. 

She heads over to the counter and Aubrey follows her, setting her Cherry Coke next to the sign for the Kepler Trunk or Treat. 

“That all for tonight?”

“Yep” Aubrey says a bit too cheerfully. She’s worrying the chain of her necklace, something Dani wishes she would do less or do much more, depending on how in control of herself she’s feeling that night. 

She has such a gorgeous neck. 

Oh no that’s too creepy. 

“Anything for the doctor?”

“Nah, he got an apple slice earlier–Dr. Harris Bonkers you put that down.” She disappears from view, reappearing with a pack of Double Bubble in hand. There are two, square teeth marks in it. 

“This too. Sorry, he really likes the smell of bubblegum.” 

“Silly bunny, that’s not for you. And don’t worry about paying for it, it’s like a buck and also Indrid will eat the stuff that didn’t get chomped.”

Aubrey laughs, “Thanks. Um, so, I’m doing shows at the Kepler Fall Festival this weekend. One at eleven and one at three. I know your schedule is probably weird because you work so late here but, um, I realized I’d never actually invited you to one of my shows. This one is going to be super freaking cool, I made up some Halloween tricks and everything. Do you know it’s weirdly hard to make a pumpkin disappear? Uh, anyway, just thought I’d ask.”

If Dani goes, there’s a very high chance she’ll get a serious sunburn. 

Aubrey smiles hopefully, the expression crinkling her nose and making Dani want to lean over and kiss it. 

“I’ll be there.”

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Dani wasn’t at the first so, and with five minutes to go before the second one starts, Aubrey’s worried she won’t show. She so rarely sees the other woman around the Lodge during the day, like she sleeps through it, and it was silly of her to think she’d see her now.

She straightens Dr. Harris Bonker’s skull and crossbones tie, looks at the crowd and doesn’t see her.  So she straightens out her cuffs and looks again, 

Dani is there, in a seat in the back row. Her blonde hair falls over her shoulders, and she’s wearing a long, mint-green dress, brown boots up to her knee, lacy green gloves to her elbow, and is carrying a green and white striped parasol. She looks so cool and hot, how the hell is Aubrey supposed to focus on anything else?

Then again, Dani clearly made time to come see her perform. 

The festival emcee announces her name. So she strides out to give the best performance of her life.

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Dani is pruning her night-blooming jasmine when she hears it; the unmistakable sound of something munching her collards. 

“Hey Dani, have you seen-”

She holds up a hand to shush Barclay, “Can you see what’s making that noise at all?”

“Uhhhhh” the cook scans the beds, then raises his eyebrows, “unless my eyes are going, it’s Dr. Harris Bonkers.”

“What the hell?” Dani slips into the next row and finds Barclay is right; the massive rabbit is happily munching a big, green leaf without a care in the world.

“He must have hopped out the Lodge door.”

Barclay shakes his head, “Aubrey hasn’t been here since this morning, and I saw her leave with him in her arms. And her car isn’t in the lot now. He must have run away from home.”

Dani frowns, “Her apartment is three blocks from here. That’s a long ways for you to have gone, doctor.”

“C’mon little guy, let’s get you into the Lodge and give Aubrey a call. She’s probably worried sick.” Barclay bends down but the rabbit swiftly hops away, leaf still in its mouth. 

“He’s right, we–whoops” Dani makes a grab for him, but he darts between her legs. 

After ten minutes of failing to catch him, Dani is even more impressed with the fact Aubrey trained him for her act. Because if he doesn’t want to do something, there seems to be no way to make him do it. 

“Hang on, I have an idea. Stay here and make sure he doesn’t run into the woods.”

Dani looks around, then turns into a bat and zips across to the gas station, grabs a pack of gum, and runs back to the Lodge garden. She kneels and calls, “Doctor, look what I’ve got.”

The rabbit, done with it’s collard, sniffs the air and turns towards her. 

“It’s your favorite” She holds out the pack and the rabbit hops forward, bobbing now and then like he suspects a trap. Only when he gets his teeth on the wrapper is Dani able to scoop him into her arms. 

He snorts, annoyed, as Dani passes Barclay the gum, “can you toss that or give it to Indrid? I’n gonna go call Aubrey.”

Dr Harris Bonkers explores her room as Dani picks up the landline and dials. Three tries over fifteen minutes leads to nothing. Kepler is in the NRQZ; if Aubrey’s not at home, Dani’s going to have a hell of a time getting a hold of her. 

She keeps trying until it’s time to go to work, at which point she sticks the rabbit in a small laundry basket and carries him over to the gas station with her. After several attempts to get out, he calms when she gives him a few baby carrots and turns on the audiobook of Bunnicula on her phone (it helps her fall asleep).

Around midnight, the door dings and Aubrey walks in, looking more haggard than Dani’s ever seen her. 

“I” she sniffs, wiping her eye, “I was wondering if you’d maybe seen Dr. Harris Bonkers? He, he got out while I was asleep earlier and I, I looked all over the neighborhood and I can’t, can’t”

“Hey, fireblossom, it’s okay.” Dani hurries around the counter a tad faster than a human should, “we found him in the garden. He’s behind the counter.”

“Ohthankfuckinggod.” Aubrey collapses against her, hugging her, “I was so worried, thank you so much, I owe you, like, big time.”

Dani hugs her back, takes a deep breath, and says, “How about dinner tomorrow?”

Aubrey looks up at her and grins, “I was hoping you’d say that” she kisses her nose, “and it’s cute that you already have a pet name for me.”

“Look, I have a lot of free time during work and it’s more fun to think about you than rearrange the candy bars again.” Dani kisses her cheek, “here, the doctor is waiting for you.”

They find the rabbit lounging, legs out, as the story drifts from the nearby phone.

“You are in big trouble young man” Aubrey scoops him up and holds him tight, “you jerk, never ever scare me like that again. You’re lucky Dani found you and not a coyote. Or the Johnson’s cat.” She pauses, listening, “awww, Dani figured out your favorite book.” She smiles like a thousand stars as she says, “I loved that one as a kid. I’ve always been a big fan of vampires.”

Dani licks a fang and kisses Aubrey on the cheek again, making her laugh, “Then I have another really good piece of news for you.”

[caitlin-elias]

Ok this might be trigger since it involves overeating but I noticed my creativity only is there when I eat hence I overeat, any advice on this? To not have to eat when I’m not hungry to be creative? Any tips to replace eating but still be creative? And have that creative rush and fun

This is such a good question, thank you for being kind and vulnerable enough to share! One of the biggest things that had helped me recover from binge eating is differentiating between stomach hunger vs. brain hunger. Meaning, am I eating because my stomach is hungry, I've been denying myself food, I've been too busy to eat etc. orrrrr am I just bored? I think this is probably highly connected to the heightened dopamine you feel from eating, which is doubled by the excitement with the creativity, which might be creating a bit of a behavioural loop.

My tips for this are as follows:

1) eat prior to your creative task, with zero distractions. Really savor what you're eating, and spend the time mentally preparing yourself for whatever you want to work on

2)caffeine. I find that a simple coffee with half and half has enough fat in it to satiate me, it allows me to stay motivated and still get the flavor factor while working that you might be craving.

3) stay hydrated!!! Hunger cues can get all wonky if you arent hydrated, causing your digestion to slow down and your body to crave other things.

4) snack pack/veggie plate kinda things. I love to do a weird tray of cut veggies with cottage cheese, some chicken breast, string cheese, and some crackers. The variety of flavors and textures is appealing, and it's nutritionally dense without being crazy high in calories.

I'm sorry this took so long to answer, I hope this post finds you with love. Feel free to pm me if you need any other suggestions/wanna talk further!

[sydneywidevending]

The Utility of Combo Vending Machines in Sydney Workplaces

That is why in the modern world more and more investigations are paying attention to convenience and accessibility. As for the snacks and beverages, the employees require quick and easy access with the purpose of having boosts of energy and being able to continue working effectively and efficiently. So, we can observe that multisnack and multi beverage combining vending machines, which are characterised by their ability to store both snacks and non-carbonated or carbonated beverages at one location, have become an interesting solution for offices in Sydney. To this effect, this article aims to expound on different aspects that prove that combo vending machines are useful in Sydney workplaces in as much as they present benefits to employers and also extend their advantages to employees.

Enhanced Convenience and Variety

One-Stop Shop for Refreshments

Combo vending machines are large machines integrated with varied products, they contain both snack and drink sections. This fully integrated convenience device means that busy employees can take a quick break and get a drink and a snack, and do not necessarily have to leave the workplace to do so since the brevity of using a vending machine that doubles as a snack dispensary has been eliminated. Its efficacy in having so many choices in one stop is very much appreciated and employed most frequently during the working week.

Meeting Diverse Preferences

Employment opportunities entail a rotation of people with different preferences and needs concerning the food they would like to consume. These vending machines can be filled with various products that can meet this diversity in one convenient location. Whether it be healthy products such as granola bars and fruits and or even snacks such as chips and chocolates and not to mention a variety of beverages including water, juice, and soda, these machines make provision for every type.

Effectively Enhancing Staff Performance and Satisfaction

Quick and Easy Access

Here, provision of snacks and beverages can also be flexible thereby ensuring that employees are able to get them whenever they feel tired or bored. Employees also benefit from not having to walk out of the workplace in search of snacks, as they can be easily offered, so they can resume their work promptly.

Enhancing Employee Satisfaction

Offering a combo vending machine filled with food items is one way to demonstrate that an employer cares for his employees’ nutritional needs and preference for ready snacks. This small addition could go a long way to perk up morale and job performance from workers because everyone wants to have liquids so as to tackle their day’s work effectively.

Cost-Effective and Space-Saving

Efficient Use of Space

Vending Pros and Cons: Combination vending machines are dual-stationed, that is, two single vending machines are combined into one which allows for additional space on the floor. This is especially important in small businesses, or workplaces that have small room space to allow for the incorporation of the furniture. This makes it compact and at the same time it doesn't reduce the quantity of the variety of products available to the employees.

Economical Solution

In the process of completing a cost-benefit analysis for a company, the price of a combo vending machine is cheaper compared to the cost of owning two or more vending machines for snacks and beverages separately. It also cuts down the overall capital costs of establishing PFPT hence the recurring costs which include cost of capital and recurrent expenses. Also, since it will be only one machine, the problem of getting supplies for restocking and performing the necessary services will also be less complicated.

Promoting Campaigns on Health Issues

Offering Healthier Options

Most of the contemporary combo vending machines have an option that lets the consumer choose the products he desires. Company management can decide to offer staff better and healthier products like nuts, dried fruits, low calorie chips, and drinks without sugar so as to improve the health standards of their families. This is in line with companies implementing workplace wellness programs focused on promoting health in the workforce and diminishing employee absenteeism rates.

Encouraging Balanced Choices

The idea is to improve the contents of traditional vending machines so that they offer both, health and junk food, with the aim of making employees choose reasonable snacks. The staff can choose healthier snacks during working hours and indulge in sweet foods sessions once in a while, which reduces consumption of unhealthy foods.

The purpose of the research is to identify the technological developments and how they affect the User Experience.

Modern Payment Options

The modern combined vending machines are highly developed to incorporate different payment methods such as credit card, debit card, mobile payment, touchless solutions, among others. This makes the flow of a business transaction fast and efficient as it is up to date in response to the cashless society common in most business establishments today.

Real-Time Monitoring and Maintenance

The trend in combo vending machines currently being developed is that they are fitted with remote monitoring features through which the operators are able to monitor their commodities’ stock and the functioning of the vending machines in real time. This keeps the stock of the machines replenished and operational at all times and this in turn reduces the rate of failure or getting out of order hence improving on the experience of the users.

The combo vending machines have therefore been a significant and worthy addition to the workplaces in Sydney as they improve productivity to the employers and the employees respectively. They provide more options and choices, improve the convenience, cater to health and welfare programs, and promote health awareness. They are also rational today in terms of cost as well as efficient in their use of space. As it has been suggested earlier, through implementing combo vending machines in Sydney, businesses will experience improved productivity, employee satisfaction, and reduced instances of overweight and obesity.

For more info visit here:- vending machines for workplace

[itslottiehere]

even the sun gets clouded sometimes (h.s) —  part three

hello beautiful people! here we are, part three is all yours. this fic means so much to me, and this part is extremely autobiographic, and i just hope you don’t mind that lol. i just wanted to thank you again for the crazy support i received on this fic, it still doesn’t feel real. thank you, thank you, thank you. please, as always, read the trigger warnings. it’s a sensitive topic, and i don’t want anyone to feel uncomfortable. as always, please leave your feedback in my asks on in the tags, it’s really important! without further ado, happy reading! love you all <3

> part one | part two

masterlist | leave your feedback or requests here

tw: angst, fluff, swearing, talk of self harm.

word count: 8.4k (grab a snack)

—

their movie nights became a regular thing. every week, one of them would text the other “movie night?” and in a half hour at most they were sitting on her couch, a take out of some sorts on the coffee table, deciding who could choose the movie that night. it usually happened after a hard day, like when harry’s car got totalled (and he got to sleep on her couch again. “double win this time”, he thought) or when she had back to back clients who were way too rude, and she just wanted to relax. if someone had asked her a month before if she thought about spending time with harry as “relaxing”, she would’ve laughed at their faces for 10 minutes straight. but it turned out that harry’s a great listener, a really good one. maybe not so much at giving advice.

“just tell him to fuck off.”

“harry, i can’t do that, he’s my boss!”

“and what? bosses can’t fuck off?” 

this went on for a few weeks, and in that time she got to know a little bit more of harry: his interests, his hobbies, the movies he liked best.

he was a real fan of romcoms, and the dichotomy was extremely funny: a tall, well-built man, who had a resting face that seemed to be of someone bothered 24/7, who teared up whenever he saw a cliché love story.

harry would argue all the time that he was definitely not crying, and she’d let it slide. it was kinda cute. 

she also learned that harry was a lover of cats, and wished he could get one but feared that they were going to get lonely, with him being out most of the time.

“it’d be nice to have someone around, you know? the apartment gets lonely sometimes.”

she nodded solemnly, understanding perfectly what he was saying. sometimes it was just nice to have someone there with you. not in a romantic way, not even in a friendly way, but just in.. an existing together kind of way. 

she felt the same often, and that’s why niall was frequently over at her place. he loved being at her’s — mostly for the couch and the beer she kept just for him in the fridge — and she liked the company.

harry actually found out a bit more about her. she didn’t share much — and he didn’t dare ask any personal questions this time, still embarrassed about what happened almost two months and a half before. but he learned what she did for a living, which was interesting.

“yeah, i work for a publishing company. that’s why i have a thousand books all over, i can’t seem to find a place for every one of them. but it’s okay, i love being surrounded by them.”

“but the others say that you’re on the night shift whenever you are not out with us, made me think you were a nurse?”

“oh well, they say that when i stay late at the office. i usually stay there till after 11pm, hence why they call it “the night shift”.”

“why do you stay so late?” harry inquired, putting his chin into his hand, leaning a bit forward.

“sometimes it’s because i have a deadline, or because i’m reading a draft that’s just too captivating and i didn’t even realise that time passed. i really enjoy my job, and even if sometimes i have to deal with not-so-nice clients or a crabby boss, i love it all the same.” 

“i see, that’s pretty great, actually. not many people get to say that about their job, you know?” she just nodded. “so, any new novels i should be on the lookout for?”

on friday night, harry texted her “movie night?”, even though they already had one on monday, but he was so tired from the week and just wanted to relax. and seeing her was what made him the most relaxed.

more times than not, he wouldn’t be able to finish the movie, nodding off about halfway. then he was waken up by soft — albeit, slightly cold — hands of a certain someone, who put a quilt that smelled so much like her on him and was picking up his legs, urging him to lay down and get in a more comfortable position.

she never woke him up telling him to go home, just offered him a place to stay. he really couldn’t put into words how much he appreciated that.

so, he was hoping to see her and perhaps get to sleep on that soft couch, surrounded by everything that reminded him of her. he didn’t know if it was weird, how much comfort she brought him. 

all his hopes were crushed when she texted him back.

“i’m so sorry, i’m on the night shift. rain check?” 

he stopped in his tracks. he was already on his way to pick up dinner, because she never said no. 

not even when she was on her period and wanted to just be swaddled in a soft blanket, away from the world. she told him that he could come over, but she had one simple condition.

“please bring over the greasiest burger you can think of. there’s an extra key under the doormat, i can’t stand up.” 

when he arrived, he did find the keys and he opened the door. he saw her all curled on the couch, and he could’ve just smothered her cheeks with kisses.

the thought scared him at first, but when he really thought of it, it was the same feeling he got whenever he saw a cute little kitten or puppy. like, a cute aggression kind of feeling. 

he saw her face light up as soon as he came in her line of sight.

“well, that’s a nice change.” he thought. perhaps her smile was directed to the burger sitting in the bag on the coffee table, but harry thought it was directed to him as well.

so, to hear her say she couldn’t make it to movie night, made him frown. he really, really wanted to see her. he was even going to let her choose the movie! 

but a change of plans was needed.

—

it was nearing 8pm, her stomach was rumbling and her eyes were about to close. all she wanted that night was go home, have a nice bath and get into some cozy pjs, preparing herself for the christmas shopping she had to do during the weekend. 

the thought of asking harry to come over for a movie night crossed her mind, but she didn’t want to bother him, he probably had better plans for a friday night. she was more of a homebody, so staying at home sounded like a dream, but harry told her he liked going out in clubs and such.

that’s why she was surprised when he texted her, and she hated telling him no, but she had too many things on the following monday, so she thought she would get ahead as much as she could.

which meant that she had to turn down movie night, and she just knew he had that cute pout on his lips, that he’d get once she’d won the third round of “rock, paper, scissors” for who could choose the movie that night.

around 8:15, there was a soft knock on her office door.

“oh sorry guys, i’ll get out right now but you can also not clean this room, i’m going home late!” she got up from her chair and started picking up her papers so she could get out of the cleaning crew’s hair.

but when a familiar mop of curly hair came through the door, she stopped cleaning up.

“harry? what are you doing here? is everything okay?”

“yeah, yeah, everything’s fine. i brought dinner.” he came through the door and walked into her office.

“but... why? a-and how do you know where i work?” she looked at him quizzically.

“i texted sarah and asked her for the address. and why? can’t i just want to see you?”

she couldn’t stop her cheeks from getting warm, as warm as the feeling she was feeling in her belly. he wanted to see her. 

“no no, of course.” she coughed a little. “please sit. and thank you so much, i’m so hungry.”

“yeah, i know, i could hear your stomach growling from the end of the hall.” he chuckled.

“hey!” she acted offended, but was smiling as wide as him.

they ate their dinner — well, she inhaled her food — and they chatted a bit.

“so, tell me more about your job. about you, in general. it feels like i’ve done all the talking these last couple of months.” he cleaned his hands on the paper towel, getting his fingers clean from the sticky sauce.

“uhm, i don’t have much to tell, i’m not that interesting to be honest.”

“i think i have to disagree.” he looked up at her, and she could feel herself swoon. “why are you here tonight?”

“oh, i just have back to back staff meetings on monday morning, and then i have meetings with clients in the afternoon and i’m not going to be done with everything in time if i don’t stay late tonight. i need to have the weekend free of work.” she confessed, clearing up her desk from their containers. 

“need a weekend away from everything?” he wondered. 

“i do, yeah.” she smiled. “but that’s not happening this weekend, unfortunately. i have to shop for christmas presents, i’m already late and i have to get them all at once, and it’s really overwhelming.” she sighed.

“you’re tired.” he noted.

“not all that nice to hear that for a woman, you know? it means i look bad.” 

“no, it’s not what i meant. i just can see your eyes halfway closed. you can’t work right now, you’re falling asleep.”

“but i need to, harry, i have to fin-“

“no, you don’t.” he interrupted her, his gaze piercing. “i’m getting you home. and i won’t take no for an answer.” 

“but harry, i-“

“nope. we’re going home.”

“but-“

“do i need to pick you up and carry you to the car? because i will do it if you keep fighting me on this.”

she looked at him, wondering how the hell they ended up there. 

harry just tilted his head to the side. “you ready?”

it felt like she had no other choice but to nod.

—

when she asked him to stay and watch a movie, harry couldn’t say no, finally getting what he wanted all along.

this time he knew he probably wasn’t going to be the one to fall asleep first, for once! as soon as she was asleep and in bed, he was going to go home. 

his plans slightly changed though, because a sleepyhead decided to rest her head on his lap, and he couldn’t move an inch. he wouldn’t.

and honestly? he really didn’t want to. 

it was like when a cat decides to rest its head on you. you are the chosen one, and you will not move till the cat moves first. 

now, instead of a cute ball of fur, there was a just as cute girl, curled up with her hand close to his knee, lightly fisting the fabric of his trousers. 

she didn’t fall asleep that way, but when harry saw the uncomfortable position in which she passed out, he had to do something to make her a little more comfortable. and that’s how they ended up here.

he saw her sleeping before — at adam’s cabin, especially — but never got to linger on her features.

he could see she had a slight furrow in her brows, and he just wanted to put the pad of his finger against her skin and smooth it out. was she having a bad dream? was she overthinking even when asleep? was she uncomfortable? 

then he focused on the curve of her nose, and lastly on her lips. they were slightly pouted, a bit open, and just looked so soft. so pretty, and pink, and soft.

harry couldn’t say this was the first time he thought something like that. he found himself often looking at her lips, especially since she told him she usually focuses on them when people talk.

“like, i don’t want to seem like a creep, but if i don’t watch a person’s mouth while they talk to me, it’s like 90% of the information doesn’t reach my ears.” 

and since then, he couldn’t stop himself from doing that. although, he often did that with her only. 

huh, weird.

and then he started watching her lips when she would eat, seeing how she kept them shut while she was chewing, because she couldn’t bear hearing people making noises with their mouths when they eat. harry got a pillow straight to his face one time, followed by the threat of her smashing his teeth in if he didn’t cut it out. a feisty one, she is.

and while he observed them in all of these occasions, he noticed how plump they were, how pink and just... pretty.

one night, when he was a bit tipsy, he was just about to tell her all of this, but thanks to his lucky starts sarah unknowingly came to his rescue, tearing her away from him and dragging her to the bathroom.

he thought that was for the best, she should never had to know the thoughts he had swirling through his mind. it mostly happened when he was unconscious, especially when he was staying over at her house.

“it’s just because you’re literally surrounded by her stuff. you are in her apartment, on her couch, with her quilt around you, her smell lingering. it’s fine.” he thought to himself, a pathetic way of shoving his dreams out of his mind.

when he first dreamt about kissing her, he was scared shitless. they had been friends for about a little over a month then, and he felt a bit weird dreaming about a friend that way. 

it wasn’t even something dirty, they were just having fun at the park, he was pushing her on the swings.

“higher, harry, higher!” 

“love, if i push you any higher you’re going to fall!” he said laughing.

“i don’t care, just do that, please!”

“no love, i can’t, you’re gonna get hurt.” 

she started slowing down once he stopped pushing her and when she was almost still, he came in front of her, stopping her for good when he placed his hands on her knees, crouching down a little to get to her face level.

when he caught the look she had on her face, he could’ve just melted. she was pouting, pouting, for pete’s sake.

“hey, what’s this all about?” he said, pointing at her lips.

“you didn’t push me higher.” she looked at him, trying her hardest to keep her pouting face, but he could see the smile that wanted to creep up on her face. 

“aw baby, want me to make it better?” he said sweetly, tilting his head to the side.

“yes, please. thank you.” she smiled a little, looking at him. 

and that’s when he leaned in, leaving a sweet kiss, taking her plush bottom lip between his. he could feel her crumble underneath his touch, even if he was seeing this from a third person point of view. he could feel the soft skin of her lips, tasting her cinnamon chapstick, and what he imagined — and was almost positive — she just tasted like: the sweetest nectarines of the best summer of your life.

when he pulled away, he saw her eyes were still closed, as if she was wanted to bask in the moment for just a second longer.

“made it better?” he told her, smirking at her still flushed face.

“mmh mmh, i think so.” she finally opened her eyes, and smiled back at him. “now, your turn!”

“love, how do you think you’re going to be able to push me!” 

“shut up, i’m strong.” he gave her a cut the bullshit look, and she was absolutely offended. “i’ll show you, c’mon! get on then!” 

he woke up gasping, looking around the room to understand where he was. when he realised he was at her apartment, he groaned a bit. of course he was. 

as said, he was scared. not just by the kiss itself, but by the sheer intimacy of it, because it clearly wasn’t the first they shared, anyone could’ve seen that. he also noticed how happy she was, how loud her laugh was, how comfortable she had to feel with him to show him her more childish side.

what scared him most, you ask?

the fact that he envied the dream version of him. 

ever since then, those kind of dreams came to his mind often, but he always pushed them aside, as games his mind was playing on him. he didn’t think about kissing her when he was awake, did he?

“no, i don’t”, he kept telling himself.

but seeing her all curled up against him, her lips looking so soft and plump made him think twice about his words. 

instead of just laying one on her — when she was unconscious, may he add — he decided to tuck the hair that fanned over her face behind her ear, with a touch so light he thought that he wasn’t even touching her. but he wanted this contact to last a little bit longer.

so, he lightly grazed his finger over her cheek. even her skin was soft as a pillow, what was wrong with her?

he run his thumb along her jaw, and when he felt her shift, he panicked.

“shit, shit, shit, don’t wake up, don’t wake up, please.” he murmured so quietly it was barely a whisper, putting his hands up as if she was going to go off like a bomb.

she didn’t wake up, but she did turn her head, from facing the tv to facing harry. she brought her hand again at — now — the top of his thighs, but instead of holding onto his trousers, she gripped his sweater, that was a bit baggy.

“thank fuck” he thought, because she would’ve grabbed his crotch if she didn’t find that sweater. 

—

after the movie was over — harry didn’t pay too much attention to it, after she fell asleep — he thought it was time to make her go to bed and rest properly. but he really didn’t want to wake her up.

so he tried to pry his sweater away from her fist, just so he could lay down her head on the couch and get up. he did just that, and once he was on his feet, he crouched down again, putting one arm under her knees and one under her back, picking her up. 

when she was finally in his arms, she curled up against him, tucking her head in his chest, a hand spread at the center of it. harry looked up to the ceiling, asking any god or ethereal being what the hell did he do to deserve this.

once they reached her bedroom door, he opened it with his foot and carried her to her bed. he tucked her in, and as he was about to leave when he felt someone gently take his wrist, and heard a soft voice, barely a whisper.

“stay over? don’t wanna wake up alone.”

and could he really say no to that? 

could he really say no to her? 

she was asleep before he could answer, so he just took her hand, squeezed it and told her under his breath. “of course, love.”

—

the following morning harry woke up before her, which was kind of unusual. she was usually the one who stirred him awake to have breakfast — she got better at cooking eggs and pancakes, so he didn’t have to lie anymore about just drinking coffee in the mornings. 

but last night she must’ve been spent, she probably wanted to sleep in a little more.

that gave him time to look around her living room, seeing how she decorated for christmas. there was a huge tree, probably almost three meters, with warm yellow fairy lights and red and gold adornments, a shiny star on the top.

then there were all kinds of trinkets all around, even little statues of mary, jesus and joseph, the whole nativity scene. he didn’t know she was a religious person. 

he thought it must’ve taken her so long to decorate all by herself, especially the tree. she probably climbed over something to put the star on top, risking to fall down and get hurt. couldn’t she have asked him to help her?

he decided to stop lurking and go into her kitchen to fetch some ingredients to make her breakfast, for a change. when breakfast was almost ready, he decided to go wake her up.

he walked into her bedroom as quietly as possible, not wanting to startle her awake. when harry reached her sleeping figure, he put his hand on her shoulder, shaking a little.

“good morning, sleepyhead. it’s time to wake up.”

she grunted in response.

“c’mon now, breakfast is almost ready.”

she grunted again, making him chuckle.

“not a morning person, are you?”

“just five more minutes, please.” she croaked. he muttered a low “alright”, and went to go back to the kitchen, but her fingers grabbed his wrist.

“stay here, i’m cold. heater must not be working properly.”

he couldn’t say if he was more happy or shocked by her request. smirking, he sat back down on the bed, close to her legs. but that wouldn’t cut it, clearly. 

“what are you doing all over there? get in here.” she moved the comforter and patted the bed underneath. when she noticed he wasn’t moving from his spot, she spoke up again. “hey, get in here quick, the heat is going to leave.”

he chuckled, and finally stood up and got into bed beside her. he wasn’t even in there for two seconds, that she was already wrapped around him, as if he was going to disappear.

“just five minutes, right?” he softly asked her, his arm going around her shoulders, hand on her bicep.

“yeah, five minutes.” her face was tucked in his neck, and he could feel her lips grazing the skin of his throat when she spoke.

she really was cold, and she had been the whole night. when he carried her to bed last night, she was half awake, and when she asked him to stay over, she imagined he was going to sleep with her in her bed. but then, he went back to the living room, and she was just too tired to call him back.

so, when harry came to wake her up, she tried putting it a little more plainly, and even then the man couldn’t take the hint. 

5 minutes soon turned into an half hour, and she can’t lie: she never felt so comfortable. who knew harry was so great at cuddling?

the both of them were in that sleepy state when you’re not really asleep but you’re not totally awake either, and if she didn’t have to run to the shops to buy christmas presents, then she would’ve stayed there for the whole day. 

harry could describe the feeling as heaven, nothing ever felt so right. how come they didn’t cuddle before? 

but other questions came to mind: what’s happening? why did he wish he could stay in this bed forever? why does her tracing patters on his chest make him feel like he’s on a rollercoaster? 

when they finally dragged themselves out of her bed — that was even more comfy than her couch, if possible — breakfast was indeed ruined and they decided to eat while they went out.

“wait, you want to go christmas shopping with me?”

“you’re the nut job who’s going shopping for presents five days before christmas. you need all the help you can get.”

and so, off to the shops they were.

but here’s the thing: how can you purchase a present for someone who’s right there with you? and what the hell would he like for a present? she had absolutely no clue what to get him.

maybe he wasn’t getting her a present, but she wouldn’t care, after all they started being friends only for a few months before, she wasn’t expecting anything from him. but hell was going to freeze over before she didn’t get him a present, that was for sure.

she got all the others presents, and harry went back to her apartment, looking like a porter with all the bags he had in hand.

“you sure you got everything? don’t you have a third grade cousin that needs something? or a remote uncle that you haven’t seen in 17 years?”

“my god, you should be a comedian.” she looked at him with a fake smile.

“i don’t even know how they are going to receive these if you bought them today.” he scoffed. “mind opening the door for me, darling?”

“i’m trying! you’re a pain in the ass, styles.” she grumbled. “and i’m going to spend tonight packing them, and then i’ll overnight them. i don’t know if they’ll get the presents in time for christmas, but it’s the thought that counts.”

she finally managed to open her apartment door, and let harry go in first: the man couldn’t wait to drop all the boxes and bags.

“and i wouldn’t have this problem if i went back home for the holidays, but i’m not, so here we are.” she said while closing the door.

“why aren’t you going home?” and why did she sound so upset about it?

“you know, work, life, stuff. i hope to see them a little later next year, but going back now was impossible for me.” she shrugged.

“i see. at least we’re going to spend it all together, though?”

“yeah, it’s going to be great, i bet.” she gave him a tight lipped smile, which didn’t sit right with him.

“what’s up?” he asked.

“nothing, what?”

“you’re not the only one who can read people. tell me what’s going on in your mind.” he looked at her pacing around the room, leaving the presents on the kitchen table.

“it’s nothing important, it’s probably going to sound so silly, you wouldn’t-“

“i wouldn’t have asked if i didn’t care. please, tell me.”

she took a deep breath and sat on the couch. “it’s just that christmas is my favourite holiday. i love the atmosphere and back home we really celebrate christmas: a table of no least than 20 people, all the aunts and uncles and cousins, people who i probably see once a year, at that very dinner.

and then we have all these traditions, little things that make me miss home. like, my mum used to wake up me and my sister with christmas music on christmas day, every single year, and she still does it every time we get back home for the holidays.

or like, on christmas eve, me, mum and my sister go to the church i used to go to when i was younger for the vigil, and we have this mass that it’s like two hours long but it’s just so beautiful. i wouldn’t consider myself a religious person, but being in that room just brings me so much comfort that i can’t even put into words.” she looked up at him, eyes a bit teary.

“then we used to come home, around 11am and we would watch “the grinch” while we waited for midnight to open our presents.” she sighed. “it’s such a special holiday for me, and when i think about the fact that there was a time when it didn’t feel like that, when i was away from them... i don’t know, it makes me sad.” she gave him a small smile, looking down at her shoes.

“hey.” he put his hand on her knee. “we don’t have to talk about this, any of this. i’m sorry i pushed you, i didn’t want to make you sad.”

“no, it’s okay.” she swallowed thickly. “i- uh.” he saw she was struggling to find the words.

“i think i’d like to speak about that, if you wanted to hear about it. i don’t want to force you to stay there and just... i don’t know, throw all my trauma at you.” 

“you wouldn’t. i would gladly listen, if you feel comfortable enough, though. niall is going to rip my head off if you aren’t.” the last part he murmured under his breath.

“what was that?” she inquired.

“nothing important, love. whenever you are ready.”

she took another deep breath, sitting crisscrossed on the couch, facing him but with her head looking towards her fingers, which she was basically tearing apart. 

“since i was a child, i used to feel things, emotions, very strongly. i would always say that they would feel amplified, and i absolutely loved that. i loved feeling everything so deeply, because it reminded me that i was alive and i was here and i could do anything i wanted to. but once i moved away, i don’t know what happened, but i just started feeling a little less, and a little less. till i was numb. 

i was desperate, i couldn’t recognise the person looking back at me in the mirror. i didn’t cry, i didn’t laugh, i was just... being, existing. i was younger, i was stupid and i did something even more stupid, just wishing that i would feel something, even if that something was pain.” her voice started wavering, she pulled her lips in her mouth in an attempt to stop her tears from falling.

harry was watching her, but didn’t dare utter a word. she was finally opening up — he doesn’t know if for the first time ever or not, but he didn’t dream of interrupting her, if she wanted to go on.

after a little while, when it seemed like she calmed down a bit, she resumed talking. 

“it went on for a while. it wasn’t just the physical aspect of it that was causing me problems, but also the mental state i was in. i cut everyone out of my life, didn’t go home for two years straight: i skipped christmas, birthday dinners, anniversaries. i felt like the worst person ever walking on earth, but i still couldn’t really feel anything. and that just made me spiral, because i was mourning the person i was before. i missed her. fuck, i missed her so much.” she sniffled. 

“but then, one day i just knew that it all was getting too much, that i couldn’t keep going like this or else the ending i was heading towards was going to be catastrophic. so i reached out and asked for help: i went to therapy, and i still go to this day. not exactly for the same reasons, but mostly to have a place where i can just let go, i guess.” she stopped and looked at harry, who was staring at her, his brows lightly furrowed, meaning he was listening to every word.

“and therapy really helped getting me out of that mental space. it was difficult, uncomfortable, i had my fair share of setbacks, but during one session my therapist told me something that i hold close to my heart to this day, ever since then.” she smiled to herself, eyes focused on the cushion she was sat on.

“she told me: ‘you know, even the sun gets clouded sometimes.’ even the happiest people — or what seem to be the happiest of people — have their dark days. and that’s fine. you just need to get through them.”

harry thought that no metaphor could ever be as perfect to describe her as this one was.

he was still silent, waiting to see if she had anything else to add. but she misinterpreted his silence for something bad. 

“oh god, i’m sorry if this was too much for you, you could’ve told me to stop but since you didn’t i went on and i didn’t even check-”

he couldn’t stop himself from grabbing her waist and make her straddle his lap, arms tightening in a hug that could’ve crushed her bones, but he didn’t care, he just wanted to have her close. his face tucked in her neck, inhaling her perfume, and he hoped she could understand from this hug everything he wanted to say, but couldn’t find the right words to say out loud.  

he didn’t need to say anything, all she had to know was expressed by the way he was hugging her. his face rested in her neck, her hand went straight to his hair, playing with the curls at the nape of his neck. 

she doesn’t know for how long they stayed like that, but didn’t even care.

—

christmas was around the corner. on monday, she went to the post office, dropped off every present, went to work and had the full day she knew she was going to have, but she had just two more days of work before christmas eve, then she’d spend that beautiful following day with her friends. it wasn’t going to be like at home, but it was with another family she loved just as much. 

during these two days, she worked hard on harry’s present. she didn’t know if it was going to be as good as she wanted it to be, but she’d try her very best to make sure it was.

on christmas eve, she stayed home putting the finishing touches on the presents that she had to bring the following day at sarah’s, and checked on the food she had to prepare for their dinner. 

around 9pm, she sat down on the couch, looking at her decorated apartment.

the christmas tree she got was almost a carbon copy of the one her mum had at home: three meters tall, way too big for her living room; even the decorations were very similar. 

she was sad about not being able to go home that year, but she had to be back to work on the 27th and it wasn’t smart to make such a long trip for just one day, even if it was a special one. 

but there was something more that was making her sad, or well, worried: she hadn’t skipped christmas since those years. she wasn’t in that mental place anymore, she had been clean for years now, but you can never know what could trigger you and make you fall back in old habits. 

so she tried not to think about that, but of course she just couldn’t stop. she started feeling guilty for behaving the way she did, cutting everyone out of her life, lying to them and pretending she was alright. in her mind, she knows she wasn’t in a good mental state, but that didn’t take away any of the guilt she was feeling. 

her thoughts were interrupted by a knocking on the door. she thought that maybe it was the landlady coming by to wish a happy christmas — she was a lovely older lady who always gave her candy whenever she ran into her. 

but when she opened the door, she found someone a little bit younger than her 70-year-old landlady.

harry stood there with a bottle of red wine and a present in hand. 

“happy christmas eve. let me in?”

“and here i thought you were a caroller. you sure you don’t want to sing anything?”

“shut up and let me in, it’s freezing.” 

this was probably the first time harry came over unannounced. he always texted her first, or waited for her to text him for their movie nights, but since she told him about the traditions she had with her family back home, he knew he had to do something. 

it wasn’t hard to understand that this holiday season was hard for her, not only because she was far from her family, but because of what happened in the past when she was away from them.

harry could imagine the kind of thoughts that had been swimming in her head these last few days, and he couldn’t stand it. no one should have these kind of thoughts ever, especially not during the holidays. 

especially not her.

so, he decided to participate in one of the little traditions she told him about, and thought that maybe they could watch “the grinch” together and open their presents at midnight.

when he told her this, she had the prettiest smile on her face. she never smiled at him like this, and this time he was sure that it was for him. that made him smile just as wide.

they watched “the grinch” together and they both teared up at the part where he was picked on at school. 

harry was shocked when she told him that cindy lou was played by the same actress that played jenny humphrey in gossip girl.

“no fucking way that’s her! she looks so sweet here!” 

“people grow up, harry.” she laughed. “and hold on- you watched gossip girl? how have you never shared this with me?”

“didn’t think it was an interesting fact to share.”

“are you kidding me? it’s a very important piece of information! you can’t trust anyone these days.” she muttered ironically, but that didn’t stop harry from throwing a pillow at her. 

once the grinch was over, it was around 11:30, so they decided to make some hot chocolate and wait for midnight.

“alright, 11:59, one minute to go!”

“you know it’s christmas and not new year’s, do you?”

“yes, you ass, i do know. but i wanted to wish you merry christmas at exactly midnight.”

harry smiled at her, shaking his head lightly.

they looked at each other, until her screen showed 12:00am, making it officially christmas day.

“merry christmas, harry.” she said sweetly.

“merry christmas, love.” he answered back, looking at her fondly. 

“now, for the good part... presents! wait here, i have to get yours in my bedroom.”

“ooh, i like where this is going.” he said smirking, earning an eye roll from her.

“get your mind out of the gutter, styles. you little freak.” 

he shook his head, but he was getting a bit antsy. what if she didn’t like his present? what if he didn’t like her present and his poker face wasn’t good enough and he made her feel bad? he was sure she could’ve gifted him something straight out of the trash and he would’ve loved it, but you never know.

she came back into the living room, and he could see she was feeling the same way as him. she sat back down on the floor with him, near the tree, and had her presents in hand. 

wait, presents, plural. 

he was fucked, wasn’t he?

“they aren’t the greatest presents and i usually am great at gift giving, like insanely good. but i really did try my best and i hope i didn’t disappoint too much. go easy on me, please.” she said the last bit laughing, but he could feel the insecurity in her voice.

he wanted to let her know that she would never disappoint him, but no words were coming out of his mouth.

huh, so your smart mouth can talk shit all day but can’t pay her a compliment?

but it felt like she already knew.

“so, this one first.” it was in a tube, and he didn’t know what to think. so he was quick to open it, and he smiled widely when he saw what it was. 

“it’s a movie poster where you can scratch the movies you have seen. i bought the same one, i want to put it up the wall, so we can see those movies together and scratch them.” she said, looking down at her hands.

“i love this. this is so beautiful, thank you so much.” he said truthfully. it was such a sweet gesture, and of course she would think of such a thing.

“alright, then for the second present. i thought the first one wasn’t going to be enough-” he went to interrupt her but she wouldn’t let him. “no, you shush. i thought it didn’t convey how much i care about you, so i wanted to give you this.” 

she gave him the next gift, that resembled a book a lot. when he opened it, he smiled to himself: “the unbearable lightness of being”.

she told him a thousand times that this was her favourite book and that he just had to read it, because it changed her life. but when he opened the book and flipped through the pages, his breath hitched.

this was her own copy.

“i, uh. i annotated it for you. i know it’s a used copy, — and i’ve read it like 20 times i think, so it’s pretty used — but i felt like it was just right to use my own. it’s kind of like i’m giving a piece of me to you, and i wouldn’t want to give it to anyone else, to be honest.”

he heard what he said, but couldn't tear his eyes from the book in his hands.

inside the first page, there was a small inscription.

“thank you for being here even when it’s cloudy. merry christmas, H.”

he was staring at the words scribbled on the page, wondering how lucky he had to be to be there, with her.

“it’s okay, if you don’t like it, i can just-”

“please, stop with that. i love it, i’m just speechless, i don’t think a thank you is gonna cut it.” 

“a thank you is more than enough, harry. it’s nothing too special.” she shrugged. 

“it is to me. and i’ll hold onto this forever, i promise you.” he said looking deep into her eyes, making her soft.

“i’m glad you like it, then.” she smiled. “and you speechless? that can be my present, holy shit!” she tried to lighten the air a bit, given the seriousness of that moment.

“heyy! rude.” he scowled. “now, for your present.” 

he gave her a box, wrapped with a pretty bow and a note attached to it; she decided to read what he wrote before opening the present. 

she was so giddy, anxious and happy. she couldn’t believe she was actually here with harry, reliving a tradition she only had at home. and she couldn’t wrap her head around the fact that this was all harry’s idea, that he wanted to make her feel as if she was home. 

she was just so grateful for that mishap in the woods back in october, because it brought them here, and she wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

she opened the little envelope, and took out the note.

“with the hope you’ll find your eugene fitzherbert soon enough.”

she looked up at him quizzically, but he just tilted his chin forward, silently telling her to open the box and check for herself what his note was referring to.

when she finally opened it, she felt her jaw hitting the floor.

“it’s a first edition. you probably already know this, but rapunzel is a story by the grimm brothers. and i know there’s no eugene fitzherbert in this one, and i know you love him, but i couldn’t not buy this when-”

he couldn’t finish his sentence because she threw herself in his arms, tackling him to the ground with her on top.

“this is the best thing anyone has ever gotten me. you’re just the sweetest harry, i can’t believe you did this for me. i don’t deserve this, oh my god.” she whispered in his neck, her lips grazing the soft skin. he felt the small kiss she left right on his throat, and he hugged her tightly against him, as if he wanted for them to stick together. 

“you deserve this and more, love.”

they stayed on the ground for a little while, and when she was trying to pull away he just hugged her closer.

“just, uh. just one more minute, okay?” he said lowly.

“of course. whenever you want to let go.” 

he thought he never wanted to.

but when she tried to pull away again, he couldn’t stop her.

“now my presents look like shit, in comparison to yours.” she pouted, but it was soon replaced with a smile. “i can’t even think about how much you spent over it, my goodness. you’re nuts.”

harry just chuckled, and she started talking again, looking at him in a new way. 

“uh, can i do something? but you have to tell me if you’re not comfortable and if you want to stop right away, because i don’t want you to feel forced into anything and-”

harry quickly picked up where this was going, so he placed his hand on the back of her neck, sat up, went and shut her up for good. 

her lips felt as soft as they looked, as soft as they did when he’d dream about them. this was what heaven felt like, he was sure of it.

he lightly bit her lower lip, taking it between his front teeth, earning a small whimper from her. he was going to die, he was sure of it. but if this is the last thing he got to do, he’d pass away peacefully.

she had been waiting for this moment for so long, and now that it was happening it felt like she was walking on air. his lips felt like soft pillows against her own, and she could taste the hot chocolate on them and his tongue. she couldn’t get enough.

when he pulled her bottom lip with his front teeth — those bunny teeth she was lucky enough to see whenever he gifted her a toothy grin — she couldn’t help but whimper against him, melting even more when he sucked on it lightly, as if to make it better.

they kept kissing until they were out of breath, but it seemed like neither of them wanted to leave the other’s lips for even just a second, afraid that this perfect moment was going to disappear. 

but harry pulled away first, afraid of actually passing out if he kept going.

and god, he couldn’t believe the sight he had in front of him: her eyes still closed, as if she was wanted to bask in the moment for just a second longer.

exactly like he dreamt about.

when she fluttered her eyes open, he knew he was done for. that was it, the peak of his existence. how had she gotten him so wrapped around her little finger? he was absolutely whipped for her.

she looked into his eyes, those pools of green that had always drawn her in. eight months ago, they looked at her with something very close to disdain, but now? disdain was the furthest thing she could find in them.

and fuck, was she glad about it.

after they stared at each other for a while, she spoke up again. “i still feel like i need to pay you back somehow, that present was too much.”

“mmh, i think i have an idea.” he smirked, leaning in.

“oh really?” she said teasingly, leaning in as well.

“mmh mmh.”

and they kissed again. and again. and again. and a little more after that.

—

on christmas morning, she woke up snuggled in her comforter, with two arms wrapped around her midsection, keeping her close. she sighed with content.

could things get any better?

“‘morning, love.”

apparently they could. he felt his lips kiss her head, but she wanted more. she turned around to face him, and didn’t wait a second to smash her lips against his, hearing him hum against her lips.

“good morning, bub.” she smiled against his lips, leaving another quick kiss. “sorry, i didn’t even brush my teeth.” 

he shook his head, grinning at her. “don’t care, not even in the slightest. i’ve waited for way too long to do this, so please do whenever you want to.” to mark his words, he kissed her again.

“you did?” she looked up at him and he nodded. 

“waited a long while for you, darling. i don't mind having waited now, though.” 

“ah, you’re such a sap. no surprise you love romcoms.” she smacked his chest lightly, leaving her hand right above his heart.

“hey! don’t be rude now.” he scolded her with a smile on his lips.

“alright alright, you walmart version of ryan gosling.”

“oh, you’re going to regret this.”

—

harry had to go back to his place to get ready and pick up the gifts to bring to sarah’s. 

“can’t you come with me?” he pouted.

“i’m sorry, i have to shower, get dressed and stuff. i’ll see you in a little while, i promise.”

“you could just wear my stuff.”

that made her feel all gooey on the inside, but also made her chuckle. “don’t worry, i’ll steal all your hoodies in no time. i've already started, if you remember.” she smiled, leaving a small peck on his nose.

“good. they look better on you anyway.” he pecked her lips three times before kissing her for a little longer. 

“okay, now you have go or else we’re going to be late.” she said between kisses.

“mmh mmh, you’re right, should definitely go.” he said, but just went ahead and kissed her, before she pushed her hand against his chest.

“stop it, we really are going to be late. i’ll see you soon, i promise.” she smiled softly at him, lightly shoving him outside her door.

who thought harry could be such a softie? again, herself from 8 months ago would be laughing like a crazy person if she knew that harry was at her doorstep, pouting because he had to go home and couldn’t keep kissing her. 

a couple of hours later, she was dressed up and ready to go. she heard her phone ring, meaning she received a message. glancing at her phone, she couldn’t help the smile on her face.

“i’m on my way. you ready?”

“yes, i am, E.”

“don’t know if you thought this was another person you spent all day kissing, but my name starts with an H, love.” 

she didn’t bother telling him why she called him E, maybe he’d get it someday. 

—

here it is! it’s time to say goodbye to these two softies. this fic is probably the best thing i’ve ever written, and i’m incredibly proud of it. i hope you enjoyed it as well! thank you so much for your support, it’s been crazy. thank you!

tag list (for those tagged, do you want to be on the permanent tag list? let me know!):

@his-only-angel-1989 @sunshinemoonsposts @cherrysulewski @idgasb @feestyles @msolbesg @call1800coochie @a-strange-familiar @the-art-of-living-honestly @onlyangel-k @sushiirestaurant @annesauriol @longingtobewithu @jjharry @hes-club @fairyinpurple @harrysbigspoon

[jungk0oksthighs]

Over The Odds | Slow Down

Pairing - jungkook x reader

Genre - smut, angst, fluff, S2L, ceo!jungkook, sugardaddy!jungkook

Word count - 4k

Drabble 13 - Jungkook tells you to slow down - jk pov

warnings: oc has an unofficial anxiety attack / emotional breakdown, swearing, oral sex (m receiving)

FULL SERIES COLLECTION

Jungkook stands back to admire his creation, or rather the local tipi party company’s creation. He’s hired a white tent adorned with twinkling fairy lights for the weekend, it’s in the centre of his living space and almost fills the entire room. Admittedly he’s overdone it, he knows he has, this is a tipi that most people have small to medium sized parties in – but his plans are entirely different.

The company he used were nice enough to move a double bed from a guest bedroom into the tent, along with a sixty inch smart television he may or may not have bought just for the occasion. It’s intimate in here, dimly lit and romantic which exactly the vibe he wanted. He’s proud of himself, snapping a few pictures to send to Taehyung.

Amongst the bed and television Jungkook’s also made sure there’s a small table inside, a place for the champagne bucket and snacks to sit while you spend some much needed quality time together. Things have been stressful at work, the fallout of the video leak is still very much affecting his business – as is the ongoing investigation. This weekend is a reset for him, it’s the first time you’ve stayed over since you made up and he wants to make it special. Hence the tipi.

Taehyung: Looks good! Try not to break it when you’re fucking

Jungkook’s shoulders bounce as he reads the message from his best friend, though he doesn’t have the energy to reply. Truthfully he hasn’t slept with you since the video was leaked, not because he doesn’t want to, but rather he gets the impression that you don’t want to. He’s gnawing his lower lip anxiously, maybe the tipi is too far? He doesn’t want you to think that he’s created a romantic setting only to boost his chances of getting laid. Of course he’s not going to deny it if the opportunity arises but he doesn’t want you to feel forced into it by any means.

The four week period where he didn’t hear from you was one of the must gut-wrenching, lonely experiences he’s ever been through. It goes without saying that he understands you needed space, and he forgives you for acting like a… for lack of a better word, brat. This weekend to him is about reconnecting with you, putting life on pause for two days and enjoying your company. He’s never had a girlfriend before you, not a real one, so he had no idea he was such a hopeless romantic until he found himself renting a huge fabric tent made for weddings, only to put it in his lounge just for you.

He wanted to surprise you with this set up yesterday but you cancelled on having dinner with him, you didn’t give him a reason and said you’d explain today in person. It’s nearing six pm, the time you’re supposed to be arriving when he receives another text from his attorney and best friend.

Taehyung: ??? I thought you guys were okay now

Taehyung: Link to article

Curiosity gets the better of him and he finds himself opening the link, immediately regretting that decision. ‘Y/N spotted leaving local doctor’s apartment, rumour has it he’s an old flame of the renowned sugar baby, does this mean her whirlwind romance with billionaire Jungkook Jeon is officially over?’ He tongues his cheek, frowning. Why the fuck were you in Namjoon’s—

“Hey, sorry I know I’m a little early,” The elevator ding catches him off guard, as does your voice, “Oh my god Jungkook… What’s all this?” You’re looking at the setup he’s rented in awe, your smile equally as beautiful and romantic as the tipi.

“Hey,” He turns to face you, you’re wearing a beige oversized loungewear set with white trainers to which he chuckles, he’d told you to dress comfily for what he had planned and he’s grateful that for once you’d actually listened. “Do you like it?”

“Like it?!” You’re beaming as you make your way over to him, kicking off your shoes, “It’s amazing! What’s all this for?”

An internal battle ensues. To mention Namjoon, to not mention Namjoon. What will be?

“So…” Much to the disappointment of his better judgment, he ignores your question and goes for the latter, “You went to Namjoon’s yesterday?”

He watches you tense up, your features look as though you knew this would happen sooner or later, “I was going to tell you.”

“But you didn’t.” His brows are raised. He trusts you, he trusts you, he trusts you, he tells himself over and over again until the words don’t sound real anymore, “Why were you with him?”

“I-,” You sigh, you look exhausted, “We had coffee together, I promise nothing happened. We had a huge fight and basically I’m never going to speak to him again.” You slump yourself down on the sofa, earning him to follow suit and sit next to you. So much for the romantic tipi.

“You couldn’t have gone to a Starbucks?” Jungkook’s trying his absolute best to not sound like the jealous boyfriend right now, even though that’s exactly what he is. He cracks his neck, suddenly feeling very tense. "Why were you in his apartment?"

“He said he saw paparazzi at the coffee place we were going to go to, and invited me to his place instead. It doesn’t even matter he’s an asshole, I promise you I’m done trying to be nice to him. What are we doing tonight?”

To this Jungkook clicks his tongue, cocking his head to one side – sounds like your ex-boyfriend made up some bullshit excuse about why you couldn’t meet up publicly just so he could lure you back to his apartment. There it is again, the familiar pang of jealousy with a hint of…insecurity?

“Did he upset you? Why was he an asshole?” He’s struggling to find a reason why you’d agree to meet up with him in the first place, he feels nauseous, is this why you cancelled on him last night? His thoughts are intrusive, any logical thinking suddenly becomes background noise in his brain.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” You look away from him, he knows you feel guilty but he can’t figure out why if nothing really did happen, “I found out that he’s seeing Jennie though, Jimin saw them both near my old apartment the other day. Weird right?”

“Sorry,” Jungkook laughs humourlessly as he pushes his hair back with inked fingers, “Can we just… Rewind a second, slow down.” He exhales, “Why did you meet up with him in the first place?”

As much as he’ll never admit it he’s jealous, he can’t stand the idea of you and Namjoon being alone together. You may have his trust but the doctor definitely does not. He watches you cross your legs on the sofa and recognises the discomfort on your pretty features, you’re mindlessly tapping your manicured fingernails together, something you do when you get nervous.

“He called me a few times so I called him back, he wanted to know how I was and grab a coffee. I said yes that’s fine as friends, but then we had this huge argument and I honestly never want to see him again.”

“What did he say to you? Did he try something?” Anger boils Jungkook's blood, why the fuck would you go there alone where he can't protect you.

“Can we…not do this right now please? We argued, that's all.” Your eyes are shiny, he can tell you’re stressed out and tired, “I know, I should’ve told you… I just didn’t want to upset you. And then when I was going to tell you my sister showed up out of nowhere and dragged me to my parents’ house—”

“Y/N are you okay?” Jungkook’s chest tightens at the sight of a tear rolling down your cheeks, it’s all happened so fast that he doesn’t understand why you’re crying, nor can he make sense of everything you’re saying because you’re talking so fast.

“—Which reminds me.” You’re covering your face, gripping the hairs at your scalp, he’s never seen you this freaked out over anything before, “Why didn’t you tell me you hired my sister?”

“Have I?”

“Ugh,” You groan, messily wiping your face, “And then my dad wouldn’t stop talking about how proud of her he is for moving back into their place. Can you believe that? I’m living on the left side of my best friend’s bed because I was too ashamed to ask them for help, but my big sister lands a job at your company and they’re more than happy to have her stay with them even though she’s literally the worst human alive and will be earning more money than them. Do you know what she said to me yesterday? Ugh she’s fucking unbel—”

“Y/N slow down, what’s going on?”

“—And now I’ve upset you by meeting Joon when the only reason I agreed to meet him was because Jimin had this crazy conspiracy theory that turned out to be not so crazy because Namjoon and Jennie actually are together—”

“Y/N slow down.” Jungkook tries again, but he can’t get a word in edgeways. You’re rambling so much that he can only make out the occasional word here and there. He feels guilty, even a little disappointed in himself for failing to notice you had so much going on in your life right now. You’re overwhelmed, you’re stressed, you’re still crying. He feels so bad that he had no idea about any of this.

“God I’m so sorry.” Your apology is shaky, as are your cold hands when Kook manages to grip them gently, swallowing them in his own. All this time he’s been prioritising the investigation, when really he should’ve been prioritising you and making sure you’re okay. Which you clearly aren’t.

“Come here.” He whispers, tugging your arms until you’re straddling his thick thighs, your face buried into the crook of his neck as he soothingly rubs the spans of your back, “Shh, slow down baby.”

“I’m just so overwhelmed with everything right now.” You finally break down into floods of sadness with your face buried into his shoulder, everything hitting you all at once, “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologise for feeling the way you’re feeling,” He plants a sweet kiss to the side of your head, taking in the scent of your shampoo to stop himself from getting emotional, “I’m the one who’s sorry, I didn’t realise how stressed out you are.”

And so he lets you cry on his shoulder, he knows you’re not typically an open or teary person so the fact you’re borderline hyperventilating against him causes him concern. He doesn’t want to add himself to the long list of things that have upset you recently, so he sits there for over an hour, listening to your every word as you explain to him slowly, what’s been happening in your life.

“No wonder you’re stressed out, not that you need my permission to do anything but… Next time can you at least let me know when you’re planning to go to your exes house?” He feels bad making this even slightly about him, “So I can talk you out of it and remind you how much of a prick he is.”

“No need.” You chuckle, your breath warm against his neck, “I thought we could be friends but as soon as he said he’d seen the video I…”

“Y/N...” Jungkook sighs with closed eyes, squeezing your middle. You’re still sat on him and he can only imagine how violated you feel knowing that your ex, and presumably his ex too since they’re apparently an item, have watched the now famous footage. “Thank you for explaining it to me, and just so you know I'm not mad at you. Come on, let's go.”

“Pardon? Go where?” You pull back to look at him, his heart aches seeing you this upset, the very least he can do is try to cheer you up and take your mind off everything that’s wrong in the world.

He picks you up effortlessly, smiling contently at the surprised giggle that leaves you as he carries you over to the tipi, laying you down on the double bed that waits inside. The party company really outdid themselves, it’s quiet and intimate in here, everything he’s certain you need right now. It’s calm and secluded, romantic and memorable. You’re looking at him through damp eyelashes as he lays down beside you, handing you the tv remote.

“I left my assistant in charge of hiring the new team,” He watches you with loving eyes as you struggle to find something you haven’t already seen on Netflix, “I can fire her if you want.”

“If only.” For the first time since setting foot in his apartment you laugh, a real genuine laugh, so Jungkook rolls with it when he scoots his body closer to yours until eventually you’re cuddling into his chest.

“I’m serious, I won’t even tell her why I’ll just shout ‘you’re fired!’ and point at her, on her first day too…she’ll never see it coming.” He’s smiling, running his slender fingers through your hair.

“You’re not Alan Sugar.” Your body is bouncing lightly at your own joke, eyes still glued to the Netflix selection.

“No, I’m better looking.”

“Hmm, debatable. I’m quite partial to a silver fox you know.”

He playfully tugs your hair, unable to stop himself from grinning, he’s missed you and your attitude so fucking much. “Shall I dye my hair? Or bleach it, whatever it's called.”

“You wouldn’t.” You peer up at him curiously.

“Are you doubting my integrity?” He quirks a brow, he’s happy to see that you’ve finally relaxed now that the weight of your own world has been lifted from your shoulders, he'll always be here for you at the end of a bad day. And he promises to himself to make a point of checking in on you more often. “Don’t tempt me I’ll really do it. Would you prefer silver or bright blue? Red maybe? What about pink, you like pink right?”

“Please don’t dye your hair.” You chuckle with an eye roll, “I like it the way it is.”

“Did you just give me a compliment?” He widens his eyes, feigning shock, “Holy shit, I’m flattered.”

“You should be.”

You peel your gaze from his back to the tv, his grip subconsciously tightens round you as he speaks his own truth, “I’ve really missed this baby.”

“Me too.” You hum against him, nuzzling your head into his hard chest, “Like a lot.”

“Come here.” His voice is lower than he intended, but you oblige all the same, crawling up the bed until you’re straddling his hips looking down at him with an unreadable expression.

Jungkook snakes his hands to the nape of your neck, pulling your face down to meet his in a soft open-mouthed kiss. Your lips taste like peaches, as they usually do, he figures it must be a specific lip balm you use that gives them such an addictive flavour but he’s never asked just in case you think he’s strange. Your hands are tugging the hairs on his head as he deepens the kiss into something more, slipping his tongue into your mouth with a quiet grunt.

Blood rushes to his cock the second you roll your hips against his, he was already getting hard from kissing you but now he’s ready to burst, feverishly kissing you with such desperation, messily, as though it’ll be the last time. He loves making out with you, your body feels so good against his, every time he kisses you he feels a pang of heat in his pelvis, his balls tingling with impatience. He’s waiting for a sign that you’re uncomfortable, but so far everything seems as it always was, and so he grips your waist, pulling your core down to meet his.

“Fuck…” He murmurs against your lips, feeling them tug up into a mischievous smile. Do you want this? Is he overstepping? He barely has time to catch his racing thoughts before you pull away, shuffling down the bed until your face is level with the growing bulge in his sweat pants.

“Take these off.” You order with a bossy smirk.

“We don’t have to baby.” He reassures you with a husky voice, somewhat out of breath from kissing you. Soon he's swallowing at the sight of you tying your hair into ponytail with a hair band you seemingly pulled from nowhere. Fuck, you’re gorgeous. “Really it’s okay.”

“Stop talking and take them off.”

He chuckles to himself, throwing his head back in defeat, you’re such a fucking brat, “You sure?” It’s no secret that you haven’t been intimate with each other in a while, the last thing he wants to do is make you uncomfortable.

To this you roll your eyes and drag his pants down for him, his hard cock springing free immediately as he’d apparently forgot to put boxers on after showering. He swallows again, awestricken as you spit into the palm of your hand and begin to slowly pump his length. For a moment Jungkook forgets how to breathe, he’d almost forgotten how good you are at this. He laces his fingers together, resting his hands behind his head as he watches you with furrowed brows, face folded with pleasure.

When you deem his cock wet enough he stares at you take him into your mouth, all of him, until the end of it hits the back of your throat. He groans, his eyes fluttering shut for a second when you swallow around him. He’s so concentrated on the feeling of your sucking that he doesn’t even register you pulling his black t shirt up to reveal his toned abdomen, your nails lightly scratching his stomach.

You’re hollowing your cheeks, slowly moving your head up and down his shaft, pressing your tongue to the underside. It feels fucking amazing, the inside of your mouth is so tight and warm as you suck. You take him to the back of your throat every time, you’re so good at this that he feels like he’s already close to coming. He zones in on your face, the way you’re looking at him with nothing but lust is sending him crazy.

“Baby…” He moans, his head lolls back for a second when you swallow around him again, “Fuck, you’re amazing.” He’s breathing heavier now, chest rising and falling in sync with the speed of your ministrations.

It’s when your fingertips start tracing intricate patterns on his full balls that a guttural moan tears from his throat, his muscular thighs tensing from the new mind-blowing sensation. “Oh baby…” He mewls, tucking his bottom lip between his teeth to suppress the long list of things he wants to moan right now.

You speed up as the salty taste of precum stains your tongue, implying he’s close, you’re shamelessly moaning around his length to get a reaction – and a reaction you get. Jungkook’s jaw drops, his hooded eyes are dark and blown out with desire while he stares down at you, brows knitted with pleasure. Your mouth feels unworldly as it squeezes his cock, so wet and needy as you suck even harder.

He watches you take him to the very back of your throat, until your eyes turn shiny, once, twice, three times, four, five, six times until a white hot heat threatens to snap inside him, “Y/N I’m gonna come, slow down, you’re gonna make me come,” He pants, “Don’t stop…baby oh-” He focusses on the feeling, on the way you lick and slurp every inch of him, all while playing with his balls until a hot spurt of come shoots to the back of your throat.

“Fuck!” He kicks his head back, hands now covering his face as the rhythmic shoots of come are lost to your swallows, enjoying the post-orgasm bliss. His knees buckle and legs twitch when you continue to suck him softly, cleaning up every last drop of his come, “Y/N… Fuck.” He sighs, chuckling to himself when you release him from your mouth, peppering his tip with tiny kisses before you sit up on the bed.

“Lay down and spread ‘em.” He manages to say between shallow breaths with a wicked smirk, planning to eat you out just as good.

“Not tonight,” You offer him a weak smile and he knows somethings wrong, normally you would’ve laughed at something like that, or at least given him a witty retort. “Do you have anything to drink?”

He’s frowning, “But what about you—”

“Do you have any champagne in? I fancy a drink.” You’re not even looking at him now.

“Uh-, yeah I do actually… Are you okay?” He finds his discarded sweatpants and puts them on as he stands up from the bed, turning back to face you with concerned eyes, “You didn’t have to do that if you didn’t want to.”

“I wanted to.” You nod, trying to reassure him, “I’m just not in the mood for anything else tonight that’s all, I have period cramps.”

“Oh,” While that seems reasonable enough Jungkook knows that you’re not due on your period for a couple of weeks yet, or at least he’s ninety percent sure you’re not anyway, “Do you need any pain killers?”

“No I’ll be okay, I’ll ride it out. Can I have a drink though? My breath smells like your babies.”

At this a puff of air escapes his nose before he scrunches it was a small grimace mixed with a giggle, somewhat relieved that you’re acting like your usual bratty self, “Yeah hold on.”  

When he returns with the champagne on ice he smiles upon seeing you tucked up under the covers, completely focussed on whatever film he hadn’t been paying attention to, your eyes are wide as the suspenseful music comes to a loud bang. You jump, as does his heart.

Fuck. He’s missed this so much, he’s missed you.

x

[lucy90712]

Wilbur Soot- MCC

Request: Can u make a part two of MCC when ur on ur period I would love to see Wilbur! Also love ur HC!

Warnings: female reader implied, periods and cramps mentioned 

~ I have been looking forward to this MCC since it was announced because I finally get to be in the same team as my boyfriend we have both won separately and the people we are teamed with are also really good so expectations are pretty high which has me nervous. I've been training extra hard as well to try and make my weaknesses less obvious so that the rest of my team won't have to carry me on certain games. All of this training however has made me super tired because I stayed up practicing and streaming last night which was kind of stupid of me but I can just drink a red bull or something to wake me up.

Wilbur has been super excited too because he has wanted to be on a team with me for a while and has been begging Scott to let it happen and he must have finally gave in. I love that he's excited to team with me and not have to be against me but I feel like there is more pressure because he really wants us to win together but its so hard to tell if that will happen. I would love to be quietly confident but there are some really strong teams although we do have George and Phil as well who are both pretty good (did I just make an elite team like imagine adding Dream as well) so we may have a good chance.

He pulled me up in the afternoon after I had been trying to catch up on my sleep to go on a walk before we will be stuck in our offices for ages. Wilbur has his office in an office building but I have mine at home because I like being able to just watch tv or get a snack when I'm working but its kind of good because it means there will be no echo from the both of us talking at the same time but we won't be able to celebrate together if we win.

On our walk my back started to really hurt as well as my stomach and immediately I knew what was up, I'm starting my period. I knew it was due but I was hoping it wouldn't be today because my performance will be even worse if my stomach hurts the whole time which I know it will. Wilbur could tell there was something wrong with me when I moved my hand over my stomach and walked quicker to get back home and sort everything out.

"You ok there?" He asked

"I'm good just cramps" I said

"Aww I'm sorry do you want to go home?" He asked

All I had to do was nod slightly and we were on our way home and Wilbur had an arm around my waist proving a bit of warmth to sooth my cramps a little bit. He has seen me doubled over with pain and sometimes get nauseous with how bad they can be so he knows that MCC tonight is going to be a struggle hence why I don't ever stream when I've got cramps because I will just curl up in a ball in pain if I do. We got home and when I had been to the bathroom Wilbur was waiting with painkillers and a heating pad to make it a bit better and he cuddled with me on the sofa until he had to leave to go to his office.

Once he was gone I needed a distraction so I started my stream to get a bit more practice in while just talking to my chat, they were concerned when I kept wincing after a wave of pain but I assured them everything was fine and I just wasn't feeling my best. Soon enough Wilbur joined the team vc and we interacted on stream for the first time in quite a while, the other joined soon as well and we headed into the main server for the start of the event. MCC is one of my favourite streams to do because everyone gets behind the whole team and cheers us on plus its a good chance to interact with new people, the viewers also love it each time which keeps me going even when its a game I don't like.

Half way through we were doing pretty good sitting comfortably in second place which is right where we wanted to be but next is ace race which is Wilbur's least favourite game and I'm not very good either plus with the new map we are all struggling. Getting into the game I was so nervous because I've been doing really well so far and have been sitting on 4th overall for the past 2 games and I would love to stay there but that probably won't happen. Phil is pretty good at ace race so I tried following him around but I quickly lost him and was going round with Wilbur instead both of us swearing when we couldn't make it through a particular part or our elytras were playing up.

"Fuck sake I hate this stupid jump pad" I said

"You bastard" Wilbur said

If anyone was hoping for a swear free stream then that went out the window very quickly, the combination of me, Wilbur and ace race is not a good one for no swearing. I can't even count how many times we both swore throughout but I imagine it was a lot although in the end it was worth it because I finished in 7th which is the best I ever did and Wilbur was 10th so we did really well. Coming out of ace race I went straight to the build with the leaderboard to see how I was doing and I'd moved up into 3rd in the overall so of course I took a million screenshots and got Wilbur to join some of them.

"You are doing so good I'm so proud of you" he said

"Thank you you're doing good too you're in 8th" I said

The last game soon came and finished and the nerves as we went into the hub to see our final placement were sky high especially because I did awful in survival games because my cramps started to get worse again and I just couldn't concentrate. We all loaded in and looked at the leaderboard and we were still in second, that means dodgebolt which I'm normally pretty good at but its just not going to happen today.

I'm so excited because we could actually win like Wilbur and I wanted but this is the hard part and with me not at my best I don't know how well it will go, people often target me too because I'm good at dodgebolt so I might get knocked out pretty easily. Wilbur was texting me during the break to see how I was doing and was reassuring me through discord that we could do this, he was also ready to come home right away and told me to stay streaming so we could celebrate together if we win and if not just to give the viewers a bit of content.

Dodgebolt got underway and we won the first game with a bit of ease so my confidence was rising as my cramps were getting worse. Game two started off badly when me and George got knocked out pretty quickly with Wilbur following not long after but Phil pulled through and won us the tournament.

"Well done everyone you all did really well" I said

"You did great too" Phil said

"Great job everyone but I'm gonna go home, y/n I'm coming for you" Wilbur said

With that he left the call and was on his way back while the rest of us celebrated and talked to friends on other teams or people who joined our vc to talk. It's been a while since I've won MCC so it was nice to feel that sense of achievement again and my chat are happy which is what I always want. I had a lot of Wilbur's viewers too as they joined to see him when he got back but honestly we share a lot of the same audience so it didn't feel bad only having this amount of viewers because of him because they are kind of my viewers too.

Eventually Wilbur got home and burst through the doors to my office arms wide open wrapping the round me and the back of my chair before giving me a chance to get up and let him sit down. I sat on lap and we talked to chat for a bit while he had his hands on my stomach slightly massaging it to help my cramps which was much appreciated. We celebrated our win together and promised to show off our coins when we get them before ending stream and climbing into bed.

When in bed I laid on top of Wilbur because it was comfy and he was warm while he rubbed up and down my back soothing me until I fell asleep while whispering cute things in my ears.

[pla-teau]

WANDAVISION EPISODE 6 THOUGHTS

SPOILERS AHEAD. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!

GOOD GOD I HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS

GIF NOT MINE

pietro maximoff as ‘himself’ | in the opening credits, pietro is introduced as playing himself? this just made me more suspicious about him and who he really is. it’s like wanda (since she’s the one broadcasting her show) trying to convince us, and herself, that this is her dead brother.

billy talking to us | i know tommy talks to the camera at the beginning for a brief minute but it’s mainly billy talking. i think this was a hint at his incoming powers. plus, in promo trailers for the ‘modern family’ episode, wanda’s the one talking to the camera. i bet we’ll see the kids talk to the camera in that episode but i just find it interesting that billy’s the one leading us through the beginning of the episode. plus, in rewatching the episode, pietro seems to be aware of billy talking to us and reacts to when billy talks about vision and wanda’s relationship going through a rough patch.

haydick hayward’s an ass | there’s no denying that hayward has something up his suspicious ass. first with showing the footage of wanda stealing vision’s body. then, putting in a missile and planning on killing wanda. yea, the five years were hard for everyone - no one’s denying it but there’s just something that isn’t right. we clearly see that he’s hiding something when darcy finds a file of sorts that only hayward can see and that he’s been able to track vision without telling the team. either he’s got a personal vendetta or he’s covering for something more sinister. personally, i think he’s just pissed that wanda, one of the most powerful beings in the universe, took away vision’s body when he needed it to create more weapons and whatever else he was planning. i wanted monica to punch him in the throat when he told her it was better that she wasn’t around when her mom died. bless monica for keeping her cool.

wanda’s interaction with herb | their brief interaction makes me believe that herb is just as aware as agnes (if she happens to be a victim in all this and not agatha harkness) about what’s happening. we got a hint about it in episode 3 when he tried to tell vision what geraldine’s purpose in westview was. we see him mimic agnes from the previous episode when he asks wanda if there’s anything she wants changed. he looks to her the same way agnes did when she was thrown off script. both these times involve vision throwing everything off. vision’s the one that’s been off script from the beginning of the episode this time around instead of after a weird event.

residents being in a loop or immobile | as vision gets farther from wanda and explores westview, it’s evident that there’s something off about the people. we get that shot of the woman and presumably her husband stuck in a time loop of hanging decorations and putting a pumpkin on the front steps. the woman not only sheds a tear but her hands look purplish presumably because of the cold or being stuck doing the same task for god knows how long. clearly, the woman’s in pain and is aware that she can’t break free. as vision gets closer to the loop, residents are completely immobile and stuck wherever they stand. it’s eerie and further proves that this may be wanda’s doing and wherever she is, it’s easy for the residents to be active or for her to control those near her. it could also mean that the closer you are to the hex’s border, that you become immobile as you’re farther removed from the fantasy life wanda has created.

yo-magic commercial | by far the creepiest and most disturbing commercial in the series. i’ve seen people theorize that this commercial is referring to wanda’s detainment on the raft in civil war. it would make sense since the yogurt could represent wanda’s powers and opening the lid should be simple and easy, just like using your powers. on the raft, wanda was detained with a straitjacket and a collar on her neck so she couldn’t use her magic. the island could represent the raft since it was in the ocean. ‘yo-magic, the snack for survivors’ could represent wanda being a survivor in many instances: strücker’s experiments, the battle of sokovia and the lagos incident.

pietro’s ‘part’ | when wanda questions pietro, he gets defensive about how he’s just trying to do his part: come unexpectedly, create tension with vision, stir up trouble with the twins, and ultimately give wanda grief. grief holding a double meaning. obviously, pietro did bring wanda grief when he died in 2015 but it also means to cause trouble which he has done since his arrival to westview. whenever wanda questions him about their childhood or tries to trip him up, pietro retorts with a question or makes rather meta remarks about westview.

the details are fuzzy | the comment pietro makes after a moment of silence between them. he claims he got shot in the middle of the street and next thing he knew wanda was calling her. i think when ‘pietro’ was brought into the westview reality, his memories mixed with those of wanda’s pietro or skewed them at least - it’s probably why things seem hazy to him and can see that wanda doesn’t believe him to be the pietro she remembers. pietro knows he looks different to wanda and it’s like a comment to us because even though pietro only appeared in one movie with wanda - we the audience know he’s not the same actor. this could also be mephisto really mind tripping wanda because she would remember what her brother looked like but the memories are remembered differently. enough to keep her on edge with him and make her suspect but not want to because he also says “i knew you needed me” no stranger would say that right? of course, siblings and family can tell when another member needs them. this episode really makes you laugh at pietro’s antics but go down a rabbit hole with every line he says.

the hex’s effects on people | when darcy explains to monica that her cells have been greatly affected by her entrance and departure from the hex, it doesn’t seem like monica is surprised. maybe this is hinting that monica already has her powers or simply mean that she’s putting on a poker face to hide her fear (or astonishment) at wanda’s level of power. it’s interesting to see if wanda’s gonna be responsible for birthing some mutants or at least awakening the x gene if it hasn’t already. does it mean that anyone can simply leave or that if you leave, you’ll come out with serious side effects that are possibly life threatening? monica states at the end that she’s seen cells in remission which makes me believe that this is hinting at the x gene. we’ve seen what the hex does once you go in, but what happens if an ordinary westview resident leaves?

agnes and vision | we see agnes in her car supposedly leaving town or as she claims, she got ‘lost’. when vision takes her out of her trance, agnes seems shaken and even questions if she’s dead. she also seems to confirm that wanda is the one controlling everyone because she doesn’t even let them think about leaving westview. we see more of where vision’s memory stands because he doesn’t remember (or know) that he was an avenger and that he died (twice). when she says that all is lost, she quickly starts laughing maniacally like a witch. this again makes me think that agnes knows more than anyone what’s going on. assessing what she got from vision, she’s probably laughing because it’s amazing to her that wanda’s gotten so powerful and maybe everything is going according to plan - she just possibly couldn’t overcome wanda’s control and only has a heightened awareness of the situation. there’s no mention of ralph this episode and you would think she’d bring along her husband to leave and go to her desired destination in town. i don’t know, i still think she’s got an ulterior motive and plays a bigger part in all of this.

the twins’ conversation | after sharing a sweet moment, pietro quickly calls out the obvious - the kids. only in episode 3 did children finally come into the show through billy and tommy. now, for halloween, all the kids are out and enjoying halloween. pietro, like rapid fire, remarks that wanda probably kept them peacefully asleep in their beds and didn’t wake them until now for the “occasional holiday episode cameo” so as not to traumatize them even more since she’s always been the “empathetic twin”. he seems to know that this is all in a television reality which gives him even more awareness than any other supporting character we’ve met so far. he even goes into assessing (and somewhat praising?) wanda’s handling of this whole westview reality as ethically possible. he knows that wanda wouldn’t rewrite everything: couples and families stay together and personalities aren’t far off from what they are. with this, it heavily hints that this isn’t the pietro we’ve known in the mcu or the peter from the x-men universe. to me, this furthers the point that this ‘pietro’ is just a puppet for whoever is behind all this (or just a multiverse version of piet) since he seems more impressed than anything by wanda’s powers. also, he’s been the only one to ask what we’ve all been thinking since the first episode: how the hell did wanda do this? once again, wanda doesn’t remember how all of it started which still makes me thinks she was probably taken advantage of by someone and earlier in the episode when recounting a childhood memory, pietro comments that she’s probably suppressed the trauma hence why she doesn’t remember it the same way. at the end, this could all be wanda’s doing due to her feeling so alone and grieving that she may have suppressed that memory of how this all started.

pietro’s corpse | again, us the audience and wanda are reminded that this universe’s pietro is dead. it’s another person closest to wanda that isn’t alive - harking back to her comment about feeling so alone and endless nothingness. this may just be that when wanda lets her guard down and is possibly at peace with a situation, this one being of her accepting that this is the pietro that’s going to be her brother that sticks with her moving forward, she’s reminded of the truth - none of it is real and she can’t bring them back.

vision’s breakout from the hex | as we’ve seen in promos, vision is able to break through the hex. what we were hit with was vision nearly getting killed...again. it seems that he can’t live beyond the hex either due to him just being parts when wanda recovered him or because wanda won’t let him go. either way, vision can’t live outside of westview. it physically seems like wanda can’t let him go because as he steps out of the hex and is being torn apart, the hex looks like it’s trying to pull him back into it. i know the hex was wanda’s doing but this physically makes it seem as if wanda can’t let him go and is holding him back. it’s kind of true because since vision became more aware, he’s been breaking away from wanda and she’s been trying to keep him in place and on script so that they can be happy together. in their fight in the previous episode, she says that all of this is for them as to say that everything she’s doing is for their happiness. it’s a twisted way of showing how vision can’t live without wanda since it seems that she’s the one keeping him alive.

wanda expanding the hex | wanda’s clearly gotten more powerful over the years and this episode really shows us how fucking powerful she is on her own. it’s hysterical that the base and the most of the agents are turned into circus acts such as clowns. i’ll admit i’m upset darcy got sucked in and not hayward. i’m very interested to see who monica’s guy on the outside is. with wanda expanding the hex, it’s becoming more evident that wanda may be the ‘villain’ of the show or if there is someone else behind all of this, we may not see them until multiverse of madness. still, i believe wanda is victim in some capacity - even if it means she’s fallen victim to her trauma and grief.

[transmutationisms]

saw that you finished twin peaks! do you have any thoughts you'd like to share? also, if you haven't already, i high reccomend watching fire walk with me!

ya i saw fwwm after season 2 and before 'the return'. honestly i think my twin peaks opinions are fairly unpopular bc i simply cannot read the series in any way besides as being deeply conservative lol. this becomes especially clear to me in 'the return', which is largely motivated by a narrative of the loss of american innocence (the double r subplot, the numerous instances of drugs and violence tearing nuclear families apart, the encroachment of electricity and processed snack foods and gambling, &c). but this viewpoint is seeded too throughout the first season-and-change of the original series, and fwwm; because what was laura palmer if not the series's first use of rape as metonymous for what lynch sees as a broader process of social breakdown and irreversible change? i understand that some people try to read bob and laura as a critique of the family, in the sense that the violence comes through the father, but i don't think this reading holds even in the original series and it certainly doesn't after part 8 of 'the return', in which bob is explicitly and directly invoked in reference to the bombing of hiroshima and nagasaki, here construed as an originary act of american evil.

i think in david lynch's mind, the spiritual forces and influences in the show are literal and apolitical, and frequently he seems to mean to depict them more as sources of artistic inspiration than anything else ('twin peaks' is in many ways a tv show about making a tv show, hence the double use of electricity throughout 'the return' and fwwm, in particular). but i find this really irritating frankly, because it's at best ignorant of the inherently political nature of the constructions of small-town americana, teenage innocence, violence as an act of moral corruption, and so forth—and also because, after the return, it's simply impossible to deny that the show's overarching narrative IS plugged in to political and historical lines of critique. like, i am not trying to 'force' a reading that deals with us imperialism—lynch put the show on this discursive terrain explicitly and deliberately, through not just the bomb footage and the penderecki threnody but also the inversion of classic symbols of american 'greatness' (the unlucky penny, the evil lincoln impersonator), culminating again in the violation of a young girl's body by the forces of evil. what this all adds up to is the invocation of american empire as a kind of universal moral struggle, stripped of its historical specificity or even the barest pretense of material critique or commentary. if it sounds like i'm asking too much of network television... i mean, maybe i am, but again, these were deliberate choices lynch made and specific historical events he invoked on purpose, lol. see also the jacoby trump commentary in 'the return' (cringe and yawn).

i'm not a lynch scholar but i do think there's a tension throughout his work (what i've seen) between the desire to make art about what he sees as the purely spiritual process of making art (heavily informed by his own TM beliefs), and the conservative elements that creep in anyway, noticeable especially in his commentary on american history, corruption, modernity, &c. the idea of any pure, transcendent, apolitical spiritual dimension of human existence is itself, i would argue, at best a misguided conservative fantasy, and 'twin peaks' ultimately shows these cracks more blatantly than some of his other work (say, 'inland empire') because it tries to subordinate the material to the spiritual in a kind of fantastical historical parable. but, you can see this recurring tension throughout his filmography, eg, the loss of small-town innocence ('blue velvet') and a kind of generalised modernity anxiety ('eraserhead', though taken on its own this one would permit other readings depending on how you interpreted the role of german expressionism in it).

i don't think lynch is an ideologue or even considers himself particularly political, but nevertheless his narratives do idealise a certain conservative vision of post-war america, mourn its loss, and wax nostalgic for its perceived ethos (& it's not a coincidence lynch is/has been a reaganite, lol). anyway, i thought 'twin peaks' had some really incredible moments of visual artistry (part 8 of 'the return', for example!) and i found much of it frankly beautiful and compelling to watch. so, i don't mean any of this to dismiss lynch as a filmmaker—he is, if nothing else, highly technically adept. unfortunately i did just really hate most of what the series was actually saying, lmao.

[excelsi-or]

your type (pt. 3)

BIPOC rec: Amii Ceramics  on Youtube and IG does ASMR ceramics vlogs where she makes the most adorable animal plant pots. She’s an Asian creator based in Canada. I really love her work and love watching her studio vlogs. They’re so soothing.

w.c. 770 (short little filler)

pairing: woozi x OC/reader

pt. 1; pt. 2

“I bet you can’t win noona over,” Hansol says later that evening.

They’re having a video game night, sans Chan, Joshua, and Jeonghan who have tests coming up. Regardless there are still enough people to tease Jihoon’s about his inability to get a phone number.

“Jihoon’s got the best game out of all of us. She must be playing hard to get,” Seungcheol muses.

“You obviously don’t know noona,” Seungkwan retorts. “You only get noona’s attention if she wants to give it to you.”

“We don’t even have her number. And she likes us,” Hansol chimes in.

“Hence why you guys aren’t friends,” Seokmin laughs.

Soonyoung adjusts himself on the couch. “Cheol’s right though.” He drops his phone onto his stomach to leave a girl hanging for an hour. “If anyone’s going to be able to get her, it’s going to be Jihoon.”

Jun claps his hands and straightens up onto his knees. “We haven’t had a bet in ages.” He passes the controller to Minghao after having just lost. “Should we text the others?”

The bet is half and half. Seungcheol, Soonyoung, Minghao, Jun, Mingyu, Jeonghan and Jihoon are all convinced that their best Casanova can win her over. The bet ends when someone says ‘I love you’.

“Let’s bet 100 each,” Seungcheol says.

“You’re an idiot!” Jeonghan shouts down the line.

“You’re on our side!” Seungcheol argues. “Aren’t you sure Jihoonie can do this?”

“Of course, but we’re still students. Still poor students!”

“Don’t worry, hyung. When I win, you get double your money,” Jihoon chuckles. That seems to appease him.

With the details of the bet decided, Jihoon turns to Seungcheol. “Can you invite the girls over tomorrow night? If there’s too much of a lag between the invitation and our breakfast, she won’t come.”

Seungcheol waves his phone in the air. “I got you, Jihoonie. Already done. They’ll be over for drinks and board games tomorrow night.”

“Cheol invited us all over tomorrow,” Jihyo announces.

The girls are all over for a group study evening. There are two coffee pots on either end of the table, and snacks scattered like a cohesive center piece.

Jihyo meets her roommate’s eye across the table. “You coming?”

Wheein reaches into one of the three chip bowls to pop a chip in her mouth. “Jihyo told us about your breakfast date. How was it?”

She glances up and notices everyone’s eyes on her. She scoffs. “It was fine. Pretty good actually.” She shakes her head and returns to the chemistry paper she’s reading. “But I’m not coming.”

“Why not?” Momo whines. “You just said it was good.”

Hwasa tips her head, adjusting her glasses on her nose. “She’s not into playing around, remember? And Jihoon is one of the biggest players we know.” She shakes her head. “Let’s just leave it.”

She looks up when Sejeong taps the back of her hand. “You haven’t properly dated anyone in ages. What’s the harm in playing around? He’s clearly not looking for anything serious and Jihoon oppa’s a good-looking man!”

She chuckles at the term of endearment.

“And rumours are he’s packing,” Sana giggles. When they all turn to her in surprise, Sana lifts her hands in defense. “A girl I sat beside in my biomembranes class used to sleep with him.”

She hums. “I’m not interested in playing around with Jihoon.”

“Just because you got hurt last time, doesn’t mean that you will again.”

She hesitates before closing the lid of her laptop. “Well, what do you guys know about him?” Her girls are going to be relentless if she doesn’t indulge them a little.

Everyone has something to say about Lee Jihoon, either from direct interactions or through second-hand gossip.

Sejeong claims that she’s met people who believe Jihoon’s the best in bed.

Jihyo claims that Jihoon’s really romantic.

Whereas Momo and Hwasa both say they’ve gotten mixed results when they speak with Jihoon.

“If he’s the hot and cold kinda guy, sometimes they turn out to be the sweetest types,” Wheein chuckles. She’s the most amused by this conversation, but can definitely see the pain on her friend’s face. “What about this? You just come tomorrow. One time. If Jihoon isn’t all over you, or you’re really not interested in him, then your breakfast was a write off and we’ll lay off.” Wheein tosses a sour gummy worm across the table and tips her head. “Deal?”

She catches the gummy worm and pauses before putting it into her mouth. “If you think it’s good for me, fine, deal.”

Her girls all cheers their mugs of coffee as they buckle down for a long night of studying.

[nutty1005]

Marvelous City – Chongqing Special

Video Link: https://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNTA2NzMzODYxNg==.html

Translator’s Note: This is translated off the Marvelous City - Chongqing Special Episode. I wrote it in an article form because of video copyrights issues. This documentary was filmed early 2020, but only aired recently. Xiao Zhan’s episode aired on 12 Jan, this special episode aired on 17 Jan.

Q: What difference do you feel returning to Chongqing this time round?

A: Actually for all my years, I’ve never seriously experienced Chongqing like this. Because when you’re living within it, you will not jump to an outsider’s point of view and deliberately observe places, scenery and food. I grew up with Chongqing and it’s melded within me, hence this time I came back, including the air raid shelters, the local delicacies, or the Xiao Mian, I have a new understanding and knowledge of them. The feeling in my heart is different as well.

Q: What are your biggest takeaway from this visit?

A: As a Chongqinger who has grown up and lived twenty odd years in Chongqing, I realized my understanding of the air raids shelters, I originally thought they were just shelters. But after my discussion with Mr. Xiang, I discovered that there were many stories regarding them. Yesterday, he spoke of an example, an elder he interviewed, and that elder told him that during those years, once there was an alarm, he was actually secretly happy. He would watch for the shelter the lady he liked ran into, and he would follow that lady to that shelter. So you see, it’s that sort of finding joy in their chaotic lives. I feel that that is, very accurately, the description of Chongqingers’ optimism. But actually, it’s easy to say that we would feel like that – since we have to live every day, living a day happily versus living a day miserably, why should we not live happily. But few are able to do that, moreover in such a chaotic environment. So when he told me those stories yesterday, I felt especially touched. I was quite moved, actually.

Q: How was the experience when you previously rode the light rail?

A: The line for Niujiaotuo was especially interesting. To walk from Rail Line 3 to Rail Line 2, it took 15 minutes. If the person in front of you walked especially slowly, plus everyone was going to work in the morning, it’s just shoulder to shoulder crowded. Basically, even if you wanted to run, you couldn’t, you could only push your way through and then run forward. That period was especially weird. I was thinking, why weren’t these ladies and gentlemen in a hurry, then I’d be “excuse me excuse me”, push through them and run forward, then start queuing.

Rail Line 2 would come, because it was suspended between bridges, when the glass door opens you’d have to squeeze your way in, and there would be some situations, like some people with their bags stuck outside, their slipper stuck outside, and then all kinds of stuff, sometimes even their breakfast would be stuck outside. Then there’s like burst soy bean drinks, there’s a lot of situations like this, and actually below Rail Line 2, there was a huge safety net. The net was there because they were afraid of falling objects from great heights, and these might fall and hit someone below. So sometimes, well sometimes in the summer, I would see that there’s some ridiculous things piling on the net, someone’s slipper, belt, bag or umbrella, etc. I don’t know if it’s still there, I guess they would clean it regularly. But I felt that this was especially funny, funny and sad at the same time. I mean who would want to squeeze with people early in the morning, you’d be squeezed half dead, everyone would be angry, and you’d argue in the morning.

But you couldn’t help it, it’s for livelihood, hence that time when I saw that there were many reports saying “it’s so tough, this year is so tough on me”, but then I also felt that actually everyone had it tough. I feel that everyone is moving forward while trying to live, actually we’re like a battalion, and we are all being pushed forward by our lives. We’re already at 2020 and every single day before was tough, it’s all tough, so I feel that we just have to manage and adjust. I feel that our attitudes need to be managed well.

I remember that time, I was squeezed so badly that I was plastered onto the glass door. That glass door, I was literally stuck onto it, and then when I looked down at the Jialing River, because the Rail Line 2 was suspended over it, I just looked at the Jialing River below and thought, actually that scenery was rather pretty. So, I’d just watch the scenery, and when you start to carefully observe, you would feel that it’s actually quite beautiful. In the mornings, there would be elders swimming in the winter, and then there’d be some reefs, because I recall that it’d be dry season during the winter, the water levels would go down and hence the waters would also become somewhat clearer. Jialing River, with those oddly shaped reefs, and then there was all kinds of people fishing, jogging alongside. What also attracted me was the windows, they looked like film, frame by frame, and the windows on the light rail were also frame by frame. And then after night falls, because the light rail was built along the river, the night view by the river, those lights and those skyscrapers would be varicolored, just like a movie.

Q: What do you like about Chongqing?

A: I like its summer and I also like its winter. There’s two sensations, the summer’s passionate like fire, whereas the winter, and you’d feel that the chill seeps into your bones, just you’d feel hurt magically. Hotpot, Xiao Mian, spicy diced chicken, peppercorn chicken, there’s too many of them, I love them all. Double-cooked pork… I feel that these food are something engraved in your bones since childhood. When you mention those food, your mouth instinctively salivates. I already have the taste of peppercorn chicken in my mouth, it’s strange, but I haven’t had peppercorn chicken for a very long time, but now I am just… *swallows saliva*

Q: What is the Chongqing delicacy of your heart?

A: There’s no need to say. I used to go to this noodle stall in the past. It didn’t have a name, it’s just an aunty, and that aunty is especially nice. Because every time I went there I would tell her, aunty, for example I wanted to eat wontons, we call them Chao Shou, I’d say, “Aunty I want less wontons more vegetables”, and then the aunty would put in a lot of vegetables, but she didn’t really remove that many wontons. Every time I went there I don’t have to give her my order, I’d say “the same old”, and she’d know exactly what to make, just put more vegetables inside. So sometimes, I’d just watch her cook, and while watching her busy around, you’d feel especially warm in your heart. It’s just a stall, but every neighbor would be eating there, and they’d be eating there for decades, their children and even grand children would be eating there as well. Slowly, the stall would became a part of their emotional support, like maybe I won’t eat this noodles today, or perhaps she didn’t open today, it would became a kind of concern for that person. Eventually, it’s no longer a matter of a bowl of Xiao Mian, but a habit of life, an emotional interaction. I feel that this is the power of Chongqing delicacies in my heart.

Q: How was your childhood like?

Actually when you talk about my childhood, I really liked the environment I lived in when I was really young. Sometimes I would dream and I often dreamed of that period. When I was young, the early 90s era, multimedia wasn’t as advanced, there were no mobile phones or computers. There were probably arcade centers during that period of time, those that you needed to slot in coins, but children weren’t allowed to go, we had to sneak in. But mostly, it was our neighbors.

As a child, once we finish our homework, we could go downstairs and yell out “So-and-so, come down quickly”, and with a whoosh, all the children in the district would come down. Everyone would play hide-and-seek and then beanbag toss (TN: similar to cornhole), just all kinds of board games, any sort will do. All of these games are interactive. I still remember the shop on the first floor downstairs from my home, he modified the shop to become a snack stop, and all of the kids would buy snacks from him. I remember that real fresh milk was delivered on a bicycle, everyday freshly squeezed, and we would collect from him using our own bags or buckets. It’s just especially down-to-earth. I remember that time at around 5pm or 6pm,you’d hear yelling, as in that sort “selling milk” (TN: in Chongqing accent) and those fat sausages. Over there, fat sausages (TN: in Chongqing accent), all these kinds of finger food, you know? Wow, I miss those days.

And during that period, the smells of cooking would fill up the entire district, whether by mothers or grandmothers, they’d be cooking and the whole district would permeate with delicious smells. It was just especially wonderful, I feel that that period was really down-to-earth, everyone was especially vivid. Actually, I feel that our lives now are a bit cold, just a bit cold. Then, we would know all of our neighbors, but now, I doubt that we understand our neighbors well.

Q: What do you think of the phrase “pa erduo”? (TN: henpecked, literally means to be pulled by the ear)

Pa erduo (TN: In Chongqing accent), it means that the person’s ear is especially soft. It used to mean that the man is some kind of a loser, but I feel that now, this phrase is adorable. I feel that it’s a compliment, it means that Chongqing men treat their wives well, it’s a display of love for their wives, so I feel that it’s adorable. When I’m out, I am upright and indomitable, I can be your pillar of support, but when I’m back home, I will dote on you fully. I feel that it’s especially good, my father is like this. My father is especially cute sometimes, oh dear, I’m going to betray my father. He is especially cute, he would often tell my mother to let him maintain some dignity when they’re out, just especially cute. I feel that as a couple, they are quite good, just very standard, in my eyes, they are the standard Chongqing couple. Because actually my mother doesn’t talk a lot outside, she listens to whatever my father says, but once we are back home, my dad will give in to my mother most of the time.

Q: What is your relationship with your hometown?

To me, I feel that I am just very proud of her, she’s my pride. Maybe there are some youths, actually I was the same when I was a teenager, I thought about whether I should leave Chongqing to a bigger city. At that time, everyone was talking about Bei-Shang-Guang (TN: Beijing, Shanghai and Guangzhou), and I thought about whether I wanted to take a look there, for example design, obviously Bei-Shang-Guang is the forefront of China, spearheading. I thought about it as well, whether I should go and take a look, but when I was studying in the university, and then after I graduated, to me, I was slowly adjusting to the life in Chongqing, so I feel this differs from person to person. Hence at that time I felt that it was also quite fine remaining in Chongqing. If I can’t attain a top leader position outside, or become a highflier, then why shouldn’t I just stay grounded and do well in my own hometown? Actually those were my thoughts at that time, but as fate has it, I still left Chongqing. So I feel this is really just fate, just something mysterious. Now that there’s so much skyscrapers in Chongqing, so many office buildings, so many of them graded 5A, there are so many youths working in there, fighting for their dreams. There may be some people who doesn’t like it, some may be forced to work by their families, or the job was found for them by a relative, but I believe that most youths have an ambitious heart, and they want to fulfill the dreams they had when they were studying, their endeavors, and they are just fighting for their ideals. I feel that every city has its own charm, and Chongqing charm lies in the fact that it’s vivid. It’s very lively, it’s a young city, and everyone is fighting, for their lives, for their ambitions. She is a very lively city.

Q: Do you think you have the tenacity of a Chongqinger?

A: Very tenacious. I feel that I am a very tenacious person. Just when I encounter things, like I’ve lived in Chongqing for 23 years, well-adjusted to the living and working environment of Chongqing, and then suddenly I went to Beijing, to the entertainment business. It’s just worlds apart, two entirely different living environments. And truth be told, that period of time was quite tough. Whether it was singing, dancing or acting, to me those were all brand new things, but at that time I felt, since I’m already here, then I must do it well with all of my efforts. No matter how tough or how difficult, those were my choices, even if I had to crawl I had to finish the journey, that’s how I felt.

[hanaasbananas]

100 Ways to say I Love You Chapter 77

No, no, it's my treat (Ladrien)

AO3

“Adrien.”

He startled, turning to look for the source of the voice.

“Adrien.” They called again, and he squinted as a figure, clad in a trenchcoat and wide brimmed hat pulled low over their face came into view.

“I’m sorry, do I kn—” his eyes alighted on the red and black spotted legs underneath the coat “Ladybug?” He did a double take.

“Shhhh!” she waved her hands frantically, hurrying over to his side. “Don’t draw attention to me!”

“I don’t think you need my help doing that.”

Ladybug lifted the brim of her hat a little, peering up at him. “What do you mean?”

“Really, sweetheart?” he raised his eyebrows “what’s with the getup? And where did you get that hat?”

“It’s my papa’s!” she said, affronted. “And I’m trying to be inconspicuous. For our date. We’ve never actually gone out in public together. I don’t want people to stare.”

“Too late for that.” Adrien muttered under his breath. Louder, he said “okay, first, you need to lose the hat. Seriously.”

She frowned, but did as he said, following him with her eyes as he stepped forward and scrutinised her appearance. “Hmm…” Carefully, he untied the ribbons that held her pigtails, stuffing them in his pocket and combing through her hair gently with his fingers. “That’s better. You can keep the coat on, and if anyone asks, we’ll just say you’re one of those people who gets hired to entertain at kids parties as Ladybug. Yeah?”

“Y-yeah,” she exhaled shakily, eyes wide, and Adrien realised with some satisfaction, that he’d flustered her. He grinned.

“Shall we?”

Grabbing her hand, he led them into the cinema, where they printed their tickets at the self service machine and then went to the concession stand. “What do you want to get?” He asked.

“Honestly, Adrien, you don’t have to get anything—”

“No, no it’s my treat.” He cut her off. “Go on, choose whatever you want.”

Almost all of their dates had been organised by Ladybug, where they’d usually just spend the evening together having a picnic on a rooftop, or going for late night walks when nobody would see them. And Adrien loved them, he did. He loved every moment that he got to share with her, but he wanted to do something for her himself as well.

Hence, the movie date. He’d decided to start small, and work his way up to the list of big ideas he kept in a secret notebook, away from Plagg’s prying eyes.

And he was certainly glad they’d started at the cinema, because he wasn’t sure what would have happened if Ladybug had arrived at a restaurant date in a trenchcoat and hat. Other than him busting a gut laughing.

Beside him, Ladybug was fiddling with the brim of her hat, looking over the many snack options, before finally deciding on a tray of nachos to go with their popcorn and cokes.

“Will that be all?” the cashier droned, barely sparing them a glance as she slid their snacks across the counter towards them. Ladybug went to grab them while Adrien paid, and he felt her stiffen suddenly.

Passing over his card to the cashier, who took it without taking her eyes off Ladybug, Adrien laughed, throwing an arm around Ladybug’s shoulders. “The resemblance is uncanny, isn’t it?”

“Resemblance?” The cashier’s wide eyes turned to Adrien, flicking between the two of them, and he could practically see the gears turning in her head.

“To Ladybug!” Adrien exclaimed. “she’s not though. Just an actress who gets hired to dress up as her for childrens parties.” He shrugged, looking down at Ladybug. “C’mon, the movies about to start, lets go.”

Turning away with Ladybug, he shot a quick smile over his shoulder, leaving the poor cashier to stare after them in bewilderment.

[dustofbrokenheart]

The Covenant: Drive-In Movie

GIF not mine! 

Pogue Parry x Reader 

Word Count: 1,172

“Baby!”

You leaned over the side of the truck in which you sat and made eye contact with your boyfriend. He was standing a few cars down, talking with some guys from the swim team.

“Yeah?” you yelled back.

“The movie’s starting soon, I’m gonna load up on snacks.”

You flashed him a double thumbs up. A movie was always ore enjoyable with snacks. Besides, Pogue became hangry if he had to go more than a few hours without eating. You blamed it on his fast metabolism because not only did he eat a lot, he always looked fit.

About a month ago, the Spencer Academy student council announced they were hosting a drive-in movie night for Halloween. And to generate more interest, they didn’t announce what film would be shown; it would remain a surprise until it was time for the event to start. 

Now except for swimming, and the occasional party, Pogue wasn’t really into the Academy social scene, but he knew you loved Halloween so he was happy to go with you.

It had taken some convincing to let you be the one to drive, but he couldn’t argue with the fact that your truck would be much roomier to watch a movie in compared to his motorcycle. You had just finished arranging the blankets and pillows in the truck bed when Pogue tossed in some bags of beef jerky and chips. Clutching two bottles in his hand, he climbed in next.

“Sorry for leaving you alone so long,” he said kissing your cheek. “The guys and I got to talking and before I knew it, it was ten minutes to nine.”

You kissed him reassuringly on the lips. “I was fine. You don’t have to be glued to my side twenty-four hours a day.”

The projector turned on and a Village Roadshow Pictures logo flashed on the huge outdoor screen.

“Besides,” you whispered into his ear. “I have you for the rest of the night.

He laughed throatily. “Perfect.”

Snuggling into Pogue, you covered yourselves in a thick blanket and settled in as the movie’s title sequence played.

“House of Wax,” you read out loud. “I haven’t seen this one. Have you?”

“Heard of it, haven’t seen it. Hopefully it’s good.”

It started out okay, if not a little on the slow side. Pogue’s attention clearly wasn’t held as he opted to play with your fingers after the first fifteen minutes.

That annoyed you a little, but you also recognized that he only agreed to come not because he wanted to watch the movie, but because he wanted to spend time with you. It was more than most of the boys at Spencer were willing to do for their significant others. So how could you really be annoyed when he was simply lovely?

On screen, things were not as lovely.

The lead actress had fallen into a pit of rotting animal parts which made you cover your eyes. You were a big Halloween fan, and you did watch a lot of horror flicks, but that didn’t mean you didn’t scare easily.

“Hey. You doing okay?” Pogue asked while rubbing your shoulders. He knew that you were starting to get spooked when you covered your eyes.

You lowered your hands and tried to smile at him. “I’m fine.”

As the plot unfolded you were most certainly not fine.

Every time you jumped Pogue would wrap his hands around your hips. The pressure from his firm grip helped to keep you clam, at least until the next scare. Then the process would start over again. But the worst was yet to come.

Jared Padalecki’s poor character had been captured and embalmed in wax while he was still alive. His buddy later found him displayed in the museum and when tried to move him, he ended up concaving his whole cheek.

You screamed at the top of your lungs, irritating some of the people parked around you.

“Shut the hell up!” someone yelled.

Pogue whipped his head around and yelled back. “Hey! How about you shut the hell up, man!”

You barely noticed their screaming match. You were too busy replaying that scene in your mind over and over again. The sick sound of the crunching waxy flesh, the tear that rolled down his mutilated face… You burrowed into Pogue’s chest.

“Oh my god,” you shuddered.

“Shhh. You’re okay, I’m right here,” he said cupping your face, forcing you to look at him. “Do you need to call it quits? That was pretty gnarly.”

Taking a deep breath, you tried to gather yourself. “No. I want to f-finish.”

His only response was to gently kiss your forehead and hold you close.

The rest of the movie was actually easier to get through. Nothing was as bad as that horrifying part with the cheek. When it ended credits scrolled up the screen, the audience cheered and clapped, yourself included. People started packing up and driving off soon after.

Pogue picked up all his empty snack wrappers, rolling them up in a ball to throw away.

“I can’t believe you ate all that,” you commented while folding the blankets. You shoved them, and the pillows, through the truck’s back window.

“Are you implying that I’m fat?”

“Your muscles say otherwise and you know it.”

He wiggled his eyebrows and you gave him a small shove. “Go throw your garbage away.”

You hopped out from the bed of the truck and got it started, turning up the heat. Pogue joined you after dumping the wad of plastic and immediately messed with the radio.

“I love my bike,” he flipped between stations, “But your truck has it’s good points. One, the stereo system and two, the heat.”

“Told you it would be better for tonight. Did you have fun?”

You turned on the headlights and joined the line of vehicles trying to exit.

“Eh, the movie was alright. What about you? Was it too scary?”

“No, no. I loved it!” you exclaimed. “The sets were great, the wax people were creepy… and the brother in the basement stole my heart.”

Pogue looked over at you in disbelief. “Y/N. That guy who ‘stole your heart’ was the one who covered that poor suckers in wax.”

“You have a point, but his introversion won me over.”

“You literally screamed your head off!”

“Things that are bad for me always get my adrenaline going.  And I’m always looking for the next rush.”

He sat there in silence. Eventually, he sighed, “God, I love you.”

You smiled, feeling pleased. Pogue didn’t use the ‘L’ word often, even though you knew that’s what he felt for you. So when he did tell you, you always felt your heart beat a little bit faster. Not wanting to drop him off at his place just yet, you invited him back to yours for more scary movies.

“Only if you promise to keep groping me when you get freaked out.”

Pulling out into the main road, you blew a kiss at him. “Deal.”

_______________

I miss going to movie theaters and drive-ins seemed perfect for fall time. Plus, Pogue seems like great cuddle material. Hence, this was born. 

Thanks for reading!