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lucimaaie · 8 months ago

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ellie as spiderwoman hcs ✧.* au

a/n- honestly was just an excuse for me to watch spiderman again and i took it, kind of switch between would’ve and did idk babes im just having fun atp

playlist | spidey masterlist

she'd have lost her mom at a young age and been placed with joel, who she never gets along with at first, thinking he's just a bil ol meanie who wanted an extra check every month.

that was until he showed he cared, not through hugs and affection in the traditional sense, but making sure she did her homework, picking her up everyday, getting her out of her room, checking on her when she'd been too quiet. "you okay, kiddo?" and "i heard talking helps." he'd say as he leaned on the door frame. eventually, she couldn't help but love him.

absolutely a nerd. though, when she got teased, she didn't exactly back down as expected which landed her in the detention a few times and some talking-to's. but she won and defended herself. no one could be mad at her for that. still, she was smart. she was going to be an astronaut after all. though that dream died in middle school.

high school came and she tried to straighten up. no more fighting bullies, even if they deserved it. she was better than that. she would get an internship, the internship that would line everything up, get her a scholarship so she could study aerospace engineering, get rich and get joel out of the old house on a patch of land with however many sheep he wanted. the same internship that got her bitten by a radioactive spider and shooting webs out her wrists.

words could not describe how much she worried joel when she woke up the day after, crushing her alarm clock, breaking the sink, the shower rack, everything. she skipped that day, hanging out on the rooftop of the house while joel was away stuck between having a panic attack from the sensory overload and telling someone, anyone. she decided on testing them out which earned her quite a few bruises joel luckily chalked up to another fight. "we gotta talk about this fighting thing sometime." she'd roll her eyes, saying something snarky before limping up the stairs. "say what you want but i win," "i heard that!"

also sidebar: ellie as a new yorker...whew. honestly ellie as anything- anyway.

hours or research ensue on cross-species genetics, spiderbites, different types of spiders, everything that made her feel disgusting. she slammed her laptop closed, crushing the poor thing.

it felt like there were a million things to do with her newfound powers but the only two on her mind was impress dina and swing from the rooftops. c’mon, she was 16 with the powers of a freaking spider. who said saving people would the first thing on her mind? she felt powerful, even weirder than she already felt but still powerful.

it was terrible, watching joel get more and more disappointed in her as she got distracted. “i’m a good kid! i just got distracted, gimmie a break.” “i have given you plenty. more than i should’ve. and that’s on me. that's my mistake to make you think that coming home late and fighting and blowing me off is okay.”

“i can't help how i turned out! don't blame me for being a shitty dad.” she yelled before slamming the door and stalking off into who knows where. she didn't even mean it, she was just stressed, she never meant any of it. hours later, she’d wish those words never came out her mouth.

she'd hoped she was having some cruel nightmare when she saw joel laid out on the pavement. "some help me! c-call an ambulance. don't just fucking stand there-" her voice was raw as she screamed out. "c'mon, don't die on me. y-you can't. i'm sorry? is that what you wanna hear? i'm sorry."

she hated the looks of pity, everyone's soft voices. people who never once talked to her suddenly caring. it was all fake. they didn't know her and they sure and hell didn't know joel.

she became another person for a while. quieter, more closed off. sometimes snappy. laser focused on finding the low-life took joel from her. that's when she started wearing the mask. the basic concept of it anyway and it caught on with the people, more than she imagined. ellie scoffed at the name spider-woman at first, thinking it was ridiculous. she wasn't some circus performer, she was just trying to find the killer.

dina as her mj, reaching out to her after joel’s death, inviting her over for dinner, talking to her in class, all of it. it wasn’t the same disingenuous pity she hated, she could feel she cared. so she allowed her feelings to fester. being with her actually helped. it was one more thing to balance with school and the internship and her mission, but it was more person in her life. she needed that.

one day ellie went running towards the trouble. not because joel's killer was there or cause of some adrenaline rush, but because she needed to do something. to not be helpless for once. she wasn't helpless. she hadn't felt completely in control of her body as she webbed a whole bridge back together and pulled cars back onto the surface, but in the end it was a like a high. it still ached to see kids running to their parents and everyone running to their families, but they were all safe. she did that. and that felt better than getting revenge and letting it suck the life out of her. so she'd wear the spandex and the mask and go by the stupid name. only cause it meant something now.

thank you for reading!

#ellie x reader #ellie williams #ellie willams x reader #ellie williams au #spiderman au #ellie x fem reader #ellie x you #ellie x y/n #ellie williams x y/n #ellie williams x you #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x f!reader #alternate universe

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academiclifexd · 5 months ago

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Finding Your Balance: Academic life and Everything in Between.

School isn’t just about projects, exams, and assignments. It’s also about exploring passions, joining clubs, making friends, and discovering what truly excites you. Whether it’s sports, music, student government, or volunteering, extracurricular activities add color to academic life. But let’s be real, balancing schoolwork and activities can feel overwhelming. The key? Finding the right rhythm so you can excel in both without feeling pressured.

Why Balance Matters?

Balancing academics and extracurriculars isn’t just about keeping your grades up while having fun. It teaches essential life skills, including:

• Time Management – Learning to prioritize tasks helps prepare you for college, work, and other things.

• Personal Growth – Extracurriculars help build leadership, teamwork, and creativity.

• Stress Relief – Activities you enjoy can be a great escape from academic pressure.

How to Manage It All

1. Know Your Priorities

Not all activities carry the same weight. Academics should come first, but extracurriculars can complement your learning. Decide what’s most important to you and organize your time properly.

2. Make a Schedule

Use a planner, calendar, or even an app to track deadlines, exam dates, and activity schedules. A structured routine helps you stay on top of everything without last-minute stress.

3. Don’t Overload Yourself

It’s easy to want to join every club or team, but spreading yourself too much can lead to burnout. Pick activities that genuinely interest you and align with your goals.

4. Use Your Time Wisely

Waiting for a ride? Review your notes. Have a free period? Get a head start on homework. Small pockets of time can make a big difference when used effectively.

5. Stay Organized

Keep track of assignments, deadlines, and schedules so nothing gets forgotten. A tidy workspace can also improve focus and productivity.

6. Learn to Say No

If your schedule is getting overwhelming, it’s okay to step back. Prioritizing your mental health and well-being is just as important as excelling in school and activities.

7. Ask for Help When You Need It

Whether it’s a teacher, leader, or family member, don’t hesitate to reach out if you’re feeling stressed or struggling to keep up. Support from others can make a big difference.

Balancing school and extracurricular activities isn’t always easy, but with the right mindset and strategies, it’s absolutely possible. It’s not just about managing time, it’s about making the most of your academic journey while enjoying the experiences that shape who you are. So go ahead, chase your dreams, and find the balance that works for you!

#education #academic #reading

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flowery-mess · 14 days ago

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I might have a fire fighter Noah thought for you 👉🏻👈🏻

He’s on a shift while you’re off, your friend has just gone through a break up so it’s girls night at your place. You text him to let him know of course and he replies with “Have fun, pretty girl. No open flames, no reckless baking, and no using the oven as extra storage again. Love you.” You roll your eyes but a smile is glued to your face, of course he’s gonna worry about that.

Fast forward to him coming back home the next morning, just after sunrise, bag over his shoulder, still in uniform. Immediately, he smells it: faint candle wax, a whisper of burnt something, and... is that nail polish remover? He steps inside and is hit with the full scene: candles on the coffee table, little tealights melted down to tiny nubs; a scorched frying pan left in the sink, blackened from what looks like a late-night mozzarella stick experiment gone wrong; blanket fort in the living room, fairy lights strung up (plugged into a sketchy-looking extension cord that's overloaded with chargers, a diffuser, and a hair curler (turned off) lying on the carpet); wine bottles (plural), empty, a cork floating in a half-full glass. And you… asleep on the couch with your fuzzy socks and his hoodie, curled up like an angel, your best friend passed out next to you with glittery stickers all over her face.

He exhales through his nose, more amused than angry, before he crouches by the couch, taking in your innocent sleeping face for a moment, and then brushes your cheek gently with his knuckles.

You hum and blink awake, squinting at him. “You’re home… early.” You really thought you’re gonna have time to wake up and clean up before he comes home.

He raises his eyebrows. “Tell me, pretty girl… which one of you thought the frying pan could double as a deep fryer?”

You wince, pulling his hoodie that you’re wearing up to your nose to hide your face. “Okay, mistakes were made.”

He gestures vaguely around the apartment. “I counted seven fire hazards before I got my boots off. You made a fire hazard fort.”

You sit up, hair messy, cheeks warm. “It was a very emotional night. We watched A star is born and cried for two hours.”

He leans in, cupping your jaw gently, his eyes soft. “You know I’m not mad, right? I just— you’re my whole life. I think about worst-case scenarios all the time, and when I see this—” he gestures again “it freaks me out. Not because I don’t trust you, but because I love you too much to even think about losing you to a candle and a bad mozzarella stick plan.”

You wrap your arms around him, leaning into him. “I’m sorry. We got carried away. I’ll never cook while emotionally compromised again… and I’ll throw away all the candles, no more open flames.”

He smiles into your hair. “That’s my girl.”

Then he gently pulls back. “But you are taking a fire safety refresher course this week. No debate.”

“Ughhh, firefighter homework?” you groan.

He smirks. “I’ll quiz you in bed.”

this is too cute and I've been reading it over and over since you sent it🤭🤭

“no using the oven as extra storage again”

personal experience?

“still in uniform”

please I would demand him to come home still in his uniform after every shift

“blanket fort in the living room, fairy lights, wine bottles (plural), empty”

that sounds like the best sleepover ever, so what if there were a few fire hazards…

“He exhales through his nose, more amused than angry”

the firefighter and boyfriend in him are having a fight

“brushes your cheek gently with his knuckles.”

🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭

“You’re home… early.” You really thought you’re gonna have time to wake up and clean up before he comes home.

funny, because he’s not early for sure

“Tell me, pretty girl… which one of you thought the frying pan could double as a deep fryer?”

I didn’t hear anything after the pretty girl, so

“I counted seven fire hazards before I got my boots off.”

girls night is a hazard on its own, he should have known better

“I just— you’re my whole life.”

stooop, I’m crying, blushing, smiling, why is he the cutest

“I’ll never cook while emotionally compromised again…”

😂😂😂😂

“That’s my girl.”

🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭

He smirks. “I’ll quiz you in bed.”

and quiz you in bed he does…

warnings: 18+ / MDNI / oral (f receiving)

Noah was feeling himself tonight, very cheeky and teasing behaviour through the whole date night. No special occasion, but he insists on taking you out on a date once in a while just because. Because you deserve it.

You two had a nice dinner at a fancy restaurant and then he decided for a walk through the city.

You couldn’t keep your eyes off of him the whole night, he looked too good in his pants and white shirt. He left the top buttons opened, so your eyes slid down to his tattooed chest a few times. And he caught you every time, with a smirk on his face.

“Are you even listening to me, pretty girl?” with that teasing tone in his voice when it happened for the third time.

His legs kept slightly brushing yours under the table, his hand holding yours and his eyes just for you.

You walked through a park and then through the city centre. It was a Friday night so people were everywhere, but that didn’t stop him from small teasing touches.

When there was a little space to walk through a crowd, he pulled you close to him, more than it was needed, so you felt his dick on your ass every time.

Or when you took the subway to get home and it was packed with people, you stood chest on chest with him and his hand sneaked around your waist under your coat. Then slowly lower to your ass with a gentle squeeze. You shot him a look, but he was acting like nothing was happening and kept looking around.

“What the hell was that?” you playfully push him into the mirror in the elevator.

“What was what?”

“Oh you know what I’m talking about, your little teasing act the whole night.”

His smirk grew even bigger and he pulled you close to him again.

“Don’t tell me you didn’t like it.” he whispered in your hair before giving you a kiss there. “I bet you had to squeeze your pretty thighs every time I touched you.”

He left you speechless, because he was right. He knew you so well.

All of his teasing got you exactly where he wanted you, whining in your bed for more.

“Tell me, pretty girl, where do you like it the most when I touch you?” he was hovering over you, leaning on his elbows, but still as close to you as he could.

“Noaah.” you whined and squeezed his hips, desperate to move this further.

His nose brushed along your jaw, before he leaned his forehead on yours.

“Here?” he asked before he slowly dragged his fingers on your arm and then gently wrapped them around your throat.

He didn’t even have to apply any pressure for you to make another desperate sound.

“Or here?” his fingers slid down your skin again, this time down your neck to your chest where they danced on the top of your boobs that were spilling from your bra. Then he took one of them in his hand and teased your nipple with his fingers.

He felt your hips move towards his to get some friction. He was touching you, but it wasn’t enough.

“Or here?” he let go of your boob and his hand slid down your body on your ass. He grabbed the skin of your ass and lifted your hips a bit so you could feel what you’re doing to him.

“Or here?” he whispered against your lips and his fingers finally touched your still clothed pussy. He felt your thighs squeeze his hands between them and your little moan. “Is that it? Where do you want me to touch you?” he saw your nods, the most you were able to give him at the moment.

“Because that’s my favorite place to touch you too, pretty girl.” he slipped your panties to the side and growled in your ear when he felt how wet you were for him.

“Noaah.” your breath got caught when you moaned his name.

“Yeah? Tell me what you want.” one thing he will never get tired of is making you talk in bed. He wouldn’t push you too much, he knows it makes you uncomfortable. But hearing those dirty words come out of your angel mouth is one of the hottest things he’s ever experienced.

“More, please.” he wasn’t really into denying your pleasure, to make you beg or something, but he was in a very teasing mood.

“I think we need to make sure you know how to behave the next time you’re having a fun sleepover here, don’t you?” he laughed when he saw you roll your eyes.

“You’re not being serious right now.”

“Oh I am, I said I’d quiz you in bed, didn’t I?” he kept talking while his fingers were teasing your folds.

“Noah please.”

“Just a few questions and then I’m going to make you feel so good.” he took off your panties and spread your legs for better access.

He ran his fingers through your wet folds a few times, realising that it may not be hard just for you, but also for him. Your pleasure was his pleasure and he wanted nothing more than to make you cum on his fingers, his mouth and his dick that was painfully hard.

“Tell me, pretty girl, where is the emergency exit?” he had to hold a laugh, finding this situation kinda funny. But there was nothing funny for you, his fingers were teasing your clit, touching everywhere but the bundle of nerves.

“At the end of the hall, on-” you took a sharp breath when his fingers finally touched your clit with the right amount of pressure. “On the le, left.”

“Good girl.” he continued circling his fingers on your clit and started kissing your neck and down your chest. The movements of his fingers were painfully slow, but felt so good.

He took off your bra and used his fingers covered in your wetness to play with your nipple. You arched your back into his touch, eyes rolling to the back of your head.

“Where do we keep the fire extinguishers?” he chuckled at your annoyed groan.

“I hate you.” you mumbled with your head tilted to the side. His fingers didn’t leave your nipple and his mouth captured the other one while he waited for your answer.

“In the kitchen,” you blurted out quickly, “and in the storage.”

His mouth left your nipple with a small pop and his lips turned into a proud smile.

“Correct. Just one more.” he continued planting open mouth kisses to your tummy until he reached your pussy.

His hands pushed your thighs apart and he leaned his head on the soft skin on your left thigh. He used his fingers to spread your folds, finally seeing you properly and used his other hand to palm himself over his underwear.

He kissed the inside of your thigh before asking you the last question “If I’m not here and a fire starts, what are you going to grab before you run out of the apartment?”

“Noah please.” he saw you squeezing around nothing, enjoying the way he got you so worked up.

“Tell me three things, pretty girl, and I’ll give you what you want.”

“Fuck, my, my phone,” he hummed and shifted closer to your core. “my wallet,” you felt his hot breath so close at that point, “and the, the safety, fuck,” you felt his tongue slightly dip at your entrance, “the fucking safety bag.”

Without any more waiting Noah started working his tongue in and out of you, moaning against you at the way you taste.

Usually Noah takes his time, doing slow and gentle licks, prolonging the pleasure for you, but not tonight. Tonight he worked you up so much that he knew you won’t last long even if he goes slow.

His tongue slid through your folds all the way up to your clit, switching between sucking and playing with it.

Your hands were in his hair, holding him in place as if that was needed.

All it took was a few more flicks of his tongue, wet and warm, that sent you over the edge. He felt your legs shake around him as he licked you through the high.

When you pushed his head away, becoming too sensitive, he crawled up to see your face.

“My pretty girl.” he praised you while you were still catching your breath. Your cheeks red, eyes blown and opened mouth, his favorite sight.

dividers by silent-stories

This story is a work of fiction, with the plot and characters entirely made up. The appearance and name of the main male character are inspired by Noah Sebastian Davis, but the storyline bears no connection to the real person. Please do not steal or repost this work on other platforms without permission.

taglist: @lacy1986 @concretejunglefm @super-btstrash-posts @amelia-acero @justcarrie @koskeepsake @dominuslunae @ami--gami @follow-me-down-to-wonderland @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @lilcrazy011 @pipidoll @chey-h @xmads-omensx @blade-dressed-in-red @respectfulrebel @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @mrscevans @blvckmvgicwoman @punkprincess1999 @fear-its-beauty @bloody-spades @n0n3xsisting @thenmaybehellaintsobadafterall @athenexe @tashka @badomensls @fadingintothegrey @concrtlimits @whatismylifexox @theanarchymuse95 @renegadebirch @theasowle @darknightstarryeyes @montgomery-929496 @kenjipepsi1 @concreteangel92

#firefighter noah #noah sebastian x reader #noah sebastian fan fiction #noah sebastian smut #noah sebastian fanfiction #noah sebastian imagine

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arlana-likes-to-write · 1 month ago

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Second Chance - Chapter 20

Masterlist

Warning: fluff, grief, cuteness overload, reader is very smart and Yelena finds it hot, kissing, teasing, hickies. everyone loves to pick on Yelena

Word Count: 4.8k

Note: A lied. In honor of Thunderbolts* here is the next chapter of Second Chance.

Honestly, you felt great compared to yesterday. Maybe it had to do with the extra hydration, the laughter shared between everyone, or waking up in Yelena’s arms, but you felt refreshed. You woke up, untangled yourself from Yelena, and went downstairs. Not even Laura was up. So you started breakfast. Sunday morning was for scrambled eggs, pancakes, bacon, and fresh orange juice. Plus coffee for the adults. It wasn’t long before Laura entered. “This is a surprise,” you smiled.

“I felt good,” you shrugged, and finished mixing the pancake batter. Once you were satisfied. “I have to take advantage of the good days.” Laura nodded.

“We have some fresh fruit that will go well with those pancakes.” You smiled. You were glad that Laura allowed you the space to cook without trying to take it from you.

Soon enough, the smell of food brought each family member out. Bucky and Nat were the first. The couple grabbed some pancakes and bacon and thanked you with a smile. Next was Copper and Lila. Laura ensured there was at least some fruit on their plate before sending them to the table to do their homework. They were supposed to get it done before this weekend. After them, it was Yelena. It seemed impossible not to look at her, and your heart flips. Her braid was a little messy. Her sleepwear was big on her frame, but she looked at peace.

The blonde walked over to you and wrapped her arms around your waist, pulling you flush to her chest. “Morning, baby,” you whispered. “Coffee is ready.” She kissed the back of your neck and removed herself from you. You sadly missed her warmth. You built a small plate for her, and she took it while she passed to eat breakfast with Natasha and Bucky. Finally, Clint emerged with Nate on his shoulders.

“I think you are getting too big for this, buddy,” the archer said, placing his youngest on the counter. You smiled and poured him coffee. “Thank you.”

“Alright, it’s homework time for you, too,” Laura said, handing Nate a bowl of yogurt topped with fresh fruit. Nate groaned.

“I don’t wanna.” He complained.

“Then you should have done it when I told you to,” Laura smiled and pinched her youngest on the cheek. Now that everyone was fed, you made your plate and cup of coffee.

“Come on, bud,” you said to Nate. “Let’s see if we can tackle this homework together.” He sighed, jumped off the counter, and joined his siblings at the table.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Yelena was sure her coffee and food had gone cold. Her eyes were trained on you. It amazed her how easily you fit in with this part of her life. You moved around the kitchen and immediately jumped in to help the kids with their homework. You were explaining a math problem to Cooper. The eldest Barton struggled with the subject, but from the looks and sounds of it, you were explaining it in a way that he understood. Gods, you were driving her insane. She thought these feelings of having a family and leaving the fighting died in the Red Room. But you were waking them inside her. To make matters worse, she had only just met you.

Once Copper focused on his assignment, your eyes found her. You winked, and a playful smirk was on your face. Such a fucking tease. A sharp flick to her cheek pulled her out of her less-than-PG thoughts. “Stop that,” Natasha said. “You are eye fucking.” Yelena huffed and took a sip of the coffee. Thankfully, it was still warm.

“Please, I have walked in on you and Bucky.” The super soldier shrugged.

“You should have knocked,” Yelena rolled her eyes and dug into the food you cooked. It was unfair how good you were in the kitchen, even though your body struggled to eat.

“Have you spoken to Melina?” Natasha asked after a few beats of her food. The mention of her adoptive mother caused Yelena to cringe. When she was in Iowa, Melina called her twice and texted her, which she ignored. “By that face, I guess that is a no,” Natasha chuckled. “She needs to talk to you.”

“And why can’t you talk to her?” Yelena countered. Natasha held her gaze before finishing her coffee.

“I have, but she clearly needs something from you that I can’t provide.” Yelena dropped it as she heard the bitter tone in Natasha’s voice. While the relationship between her sister and Melina was better, it was still complicated. There was a level of distrust buried deep in Natasha, which Yelena couldn’t 100% fault her for. Everything about her family from Russia was so overly complicated. Sometimes, it was easier to forget about all the wrong. Sighing, Yelena nodded.

“I will call her after breakfast.” Natasha seemed content with that answer, but soon a playful smirk appeared on her sister’s face. “What is that look?”

“Nothing,” she said. Yelena glared at her sister.

“It is not nothing,” she mimicked her sister’s American accent. “Say it.” Natasha shrugged and leaned back against the couch. She was looking at you with a cup of coffee in her hand.

“Have you told Melina and Alexei about her yet?”

“No,” Yelena said. It wasn’t like she was keeping you a secret. Hell, she invited you to Iowa, but telling her adoptive parents was complicated for her. The Bartons saw her as a hero, an Avenger, while Melina and Alexei knew her as the child prodigy of the Red Room.

“Scared of the shovel talk Alexei will give her,” Bucky said.

“No. That man is an idiot.” She wasn’t afraid of Alexei scaring you off due to a shovel talk. The man stood like a tank but was a softie at heart. She was scared you would finally see how much of a monster she was.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Yelena disappeared to the Bartons’ home office. Unfortunately, Melina had problems with the database she designed to track all the Widows. It was malfunctioning slightly. Hopefully, it would be a simple fix as she entered the code she wrote. It aimed to help them see what Widows were still under Dreykov’s control. It seemed never-ending. Especially with the Blip, they lost so much time.

Suddenly, her vision was obstructed by hands covering her eyes. “Guess who?” Your voice tickled her ear. Yelena pretended to think.

��Mhm,” she thought. “Lucky?” You gasped and dropped your hands.

“Unbelievable,” Yelena chuckled and spun around in the chair. Her hands went to rest behind your thighs that weren’t covered by your sleep shorts. You looked beautiful like this - relaxed, happy, and not worried about tomorrow.

“It is unbelievable you are jealous of a dog,” you shrugged.

“I was wondering where you ran off, too,” you said, taking a small step forward to play with the hairs at the base of Yelena’s neck. She felt her tense muscles relax against you. It was unfair how much your touch and voice affected her. “I thought you ran away without me,” she said.

“I would never,” Yelena said seriously while she looked up at you. You chuckled, tracing the slope of her nose with your finger before glancing at the laptop behind her.

“Are you busy or can I steal you?” You asked. Yelena looked at the computer and wrestled with two halves of herself. On one hand, she wanted to be a good daughter and fix what Melina needed. It was up to her to free them all. It could wash all the blood she shed. The other half, she wanted to be selfish. She tried to choose for herself. “Yelena,” the blonde turned her attention back to you. “If you are busy, I can wait.”

You could wait, you told her. But you were feeling good today - how many days would you have left? Yelena smiled. “It can wait. What do you have planned?” For once, she chose herself and not her duty.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Your plan was a combination of your idea and the Barton kids. Since it was your last day in Iowa, they wanted to take you to the playground. They described it as a wooden jungle gym that Tony bought for them. Honestly, it was nice seeing the billionaire care about the family of those on the team. The more you learned about him, the different image you created in your head.

Yelena left quickly after breakfast. Natasha told you she was working on something for their adoptive mother. Honestly, you were okay with it. It gave you time to hang out with Bucky and Natasha. You learned that Natasha liked to fluster the super soldier. You enjoyed listening to Bucky talk about the 40s.

By lunch, Yelena remained locked away in Barton’s office. To you, that would not do. One, she needed a break; two, you would not stand for her to work all day on your last day here. You packed a little picnic and told the kids to get ready to go. Convincing Yelena wasn’t hard. After getting changed, you followed the kids to the playground hand and hand with Lucky by your side. As the playground came into view, the kids took off running, as did Lucky.

Yelena brought you to a small clearing and spread the picnic blanket. “So,” she said once you were both sitting down comfortably. “What did you pack?” You smiled.

“See for yourself,” you watched the blonde go through the basket. First were the small sandwiches—you made enough for you, her, and the kids. The second thing was a bowl of fruit that was left over from breakfast. The last thing was a container of mac and cheese. Lila told you it was Yelena’s favorite, with a little hot sauce, which you also packed.

“Is this for me?” The blonde asked.

“Well, I would like some,” you laughed.

“Mhm,” she hummed. “I will think about sharing.” You rolled your eyes playfully. “Thank you, detka.” She kissed you softly.

“Of course. You deserve it.” Before she could protest, you took a bowl out and grabbed the mac and cheese from her. “I’m hungry.” You pivoted the conversation. Yelena smiled, but her eyes gave her away. Every day, you would tell her how much she deserved someone to care for her. She deserved happiness, love, and light. Even though her taste in mac and cheese was something to be desired. You cringed your nose at the hot sauce on her mac and cheese portion. “Dr. Carpenter called me,” you told her after moments of peace. She looked at you intentionally. “He wants me to start the new round of treatment instead of taking a break.” Yelena frowned.

“How do you feel about that?” You shrugged.

“I don’t know,” you admitted. I was excited for a break, but I trust him if he wants me to move forward.” Yelena took your free hand and rubbed her thumb across it. “I am a little nervous,” you whispered. I don’t know how this will affect me.”

“You are not alone, though,” she said. “I am here and so is Stark.” You smiled.

“I know,” you squeezed her hand. “I start tomorrow.” Yelena nodded. Thankfully, she dropped it and focused on the food you provided. Once you both were done, you cuddled against the blonde and watched the kids play.

“Thank you for coming,” Yelena whispered, kissing your forehead.

“Thank you for inviting me,” you said back. “I love it here.” Your face was pressed into the crook of her neck. You kissed the skin you could reach without entirely pulling away from her. You could feel her breath hitch, and it made you smile. It was a little mean, but you felt so powerful when she became affected by you. How could you not? A Black Widow, an Avenger, was weak to you. You sucked a mark on her neck. The groan she let out made your stomach dip.

Carefully, she grabbed your chin and forced you to look at her. Her touch was gentle yet firm. Her green eyes were dark, but you weren’t scared. “Careful, sweetheart,” she mumbled. “Do not start something you do not wish to finish.” Her lips ghosted against yours, and you moved to kiss her, but she refused to kiss you, still holding you in place. A soft whimper escaped your lips before you could stop it. Yelena smirked. “Takoy nuzhdayushchiysya (so needy).”

Finally, she kissed you. She kept it tamed due to being outside and in front of the kids, but God above you wanted to deepen it, forgo anything deemed unacceptable. She was weak to you, but you were weak to her. She was a drug that you were addicted to. Suddenly, Yelena yelped and ended the kiss. She rubbed her ear and glared at her sister, who appeared with Bucky, Clint, and Laura. “Keep it PG, children.” Yelena secretly flipped off her sister. Natasha tisked. “Come on, Belova,” she said. “You’re up,” Yelena mumbled something in Russian but stood up. She helped you stand and followed the group.

You shouldn’t be surprised that they added a knife-throwing range on the back of the playground. Even the three Barton kids gathered to watch the competition between Natasha and Clint vs. Bucky and Yelena. From your understanding, the targets were divided into points. The closer to the center, the more points you received. However, they staggered the targets. If you hit the furthest target, your points were tripled. Laura was in charge of keeping score.

It was a close match. Natasha would hit a bullseye on the second target, and Bucky would copy. Clint hit the first target, and Yelena followed suit. It was fun to watch, but your mind couldn’t help but try to find a mathematical way to figure it out.

Math was simple. Math was dependable. All you needed was the distance from the starting point to the target, average speed, and the knife’s balance. Observing Yelena, her grip on the knife changed depending on what target she was aiming at. She held it by the handle for another one and by the blade if it was the closest one. Interesting.

So you would need to solve for R - the number of rotations required to hit the target. The formula danced in your head.

R = w*t = w * d/v. Simplified, the formula would be R = w*d/v.

The knife Natasha threw at the first target rotated 2 times per second, with the target only being 5 meters away. If you threw the knife at 10 m/s, you would only need one rotation. R = 2.5/10 = 1.

Other factors, like wind, sunlight, and the knife’s weight, would be harder to factor in, but it was close.

The competition ended with Clint and Natasha winning by 2 points. “Can I try?” Everyone looked at you, obviously shocked.

“Go for it detka,” Yelena said. You smiled at the blonde and walked over to the starting point. Three knives were waiting for you.

“I can move it closer.” Clint offered. You glared at the man and picked up the knife, which caused him to shrink back.

“Careful, babe,” Laura laughed. “Never tell a woman what to do with a knife in her hand.” You looked at the knife in your hand and tested the weight. One rotation was all you needed, if your math was correct. You aimed at the target and threw it. The knife hit it, but not the bullseye. You frowned and picked up the second. So your math was correct, but your aim was the problem. The second knife hit the bullseye, but not the center. You huffed and bit your lip. The third and final knife his dead center.

“Eh, not bad,” you turned to look at the group. They were stunned into silence beside Yelena. Her green eyes were dark again, looking you up and down. It made your body head up. “What?” You questioned. “Do I have something on my face?”

“How the hell did you do that?” Natasha asked and pointed to the target. You looked at the older Black Widow, then back at the target.

“It’s basic math,” you sighed when they remained quiet. I calculated the distance between the target and how many rotations I would need,” you shrugged. It’s a little iffy with the sun and wind, but I made it work.”

Bucky whistled. “Damn, remind me never to piss you off.” You laughed.

“Don’t play me in pool then.” It was a simple statement that you thought would amount to nothing. You weren’t expecting to be led back to the Bartons’ house and down to the basement - a fully renovated basement with a massive movie screen and a mini bar. Yelena told you the basement project was a present from Kate. Everyone seemed to be spoiling the Barton kids. You needed to step up on your Auntie duties. You could take Lila and Cooper swimming with sharks. But you weren’t sure how happy Laura would be about that.

You took a pool stick off the wall while Clint racked the balls. The archer was your first opponent. “Do you want to break it?” You asked him as you put the chalk on the tip.

“Ladies, first,” you rolled your eyes but set up. Everyone filed into the room. Yelena was behind the bar making tisked for the kids, but you could feel her eyes on you. Laura made some popcorn while Bucky and Natasha leaned up against the wall. You swore you saw Natasha pass a ten-dollar bill to her boyfriend.

You broke the balls—not sinking any, but that was okay. It was your plan of action. It allowed Clint to sink two stripe balls back to back, but he missed his third. So you were solid.

Pool held a special place in your heart. It reminded you of your college days of sneaking into a bar you weren’t old enough to be in and beating men double your age for 20-100 bucks. Chelsie and you would play for hours at an old mom-and-pop restaurant. The owner allowed you to play and provided all the fires you could eat if you helped him each year during tax season.

But your love for the simple game came from your mom. She told you stories of how she would hustle men at bars to earn extra bucks. It wasn’t her intention to teach her 6-year-old, but you had a knack for it.

It helped that you saw the table as a coordinate plan. It was a simple chalkboard - the table became a grid. Each pocket a fixed point and every ball a coordinate. It wasn’t a randomness they become vectors and trajectories. You could sketch invisible lines in your head: a triangle from a cue ball to the rail to the target.

The entire game was a mental game of geometry. “Pocking the 8,” you told him. The game wasn’t close. You made two shots back to back and ‘missed’ the next. This allowed Clint to get one more shot, and then you ran away with the game. But the shot you called wasn’t going to be easy. There were a few balls in the way, but you weren’t worried. Smiling, you took your stance and hit the cue ball.

It was a trick shot as your aim was at the wall, not the ball. Even though you were 95% sure the ball would go in, you were still impressed when you landed it. Clint shook his head with a laugh. “How did you do that?” You shrugged and began gathering the balls to re-rack.

“It’s simple geometry,” you smiled at the others. “Whose next?”

Maybe it was a little mean and a major ego bust that you were able to best a few Avengers, but you needed the few wins life would give you. However, Yelena was a challenge. She was shoot for shoot with you. Maybe it was a dirty play, but you had to rely on a different tactic. Flirting. Sometimes you had to go low to keep your winning streak alive. Small touches. Playful smirks. She leaned over the table while she took her shot.

You sank the winning shot and straightened up. “Told you,” you smirked. “I know my way around a pool table.” You put your stick back. “I would bleed men dry with bets.” Natasha walked behind Yelena.

“I think you broke my sister,” she smacked the blonde on the back of her head. It snapped her out of whatever slump she was in.

“Dinner is ready,” Laura called from the stairs. She left to start the food before the final game. The basement cleared out one by one until it was just you and Yelena. Her green eyes followed you as you approached the pool stick in her hand. You took it easily from her.

“You know,” you smirked. “This is the quietest I’ve seen you.” You put the pool stick back and walked back over. Suddenly, Yelena pinned you to the pool table. The edge pushed into your back, but the pain wasn’t on your mind when her lips were on your neck. “Shit,” you stuttered and gripped onto her shoulder.

“I have been trying to control myself,” she bite down hard, no doubt leaving a mark you’d get shit for. “You have no idea how fucking hot you are.”

“Lena,” you moaned, back arching as her hand slid underneath your shirt. “Please.” You weren’t sure what you were pleading for. Hell, all rational thought left your brain. You were seconds from letting her fuck you against the pool table.

“Please, what, baby?” Yelena chuckled against your skin. Tell me what you want. I would give you anything; you have to ask.” You were thankful that she held onto your waist, or your legs would have given out. “Fucking beautiful.” Yup. Your first time with Yelena would be up against a pool table in Barton’s basement. You were okay with that.

Then the basement door opened. “Get your tongues out of each other’s mouths and come eat food,” Natasha’s voice called out. Yelena groaned against your skin.

“Come on,” you giggled and patted her back. “The last thing I want is for your sister to see you with your hand down my pants.” You gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and gently pushed her away. Before she could complain, you grabbed her hand and pulled her up the stairs. Natasha smirked as you walked by her.

“Nice artwork you got there,” she teased, pointing to your neck. You shrugged.

“The chemo makes me bruise easily.” You grabbed a plate from Laura, who was also trying to hide her smile but failing. “I didn’t know I was dating a vampire.” Yelena gasped.

“Were you not the one to say you like to claim what is yours?” A chorus of ‘ew’s came from the dining room table. You were sure you heard Copper yell, ‘Get a room, ' which Yelena mumbled, ‘I wish.’ Yeah, you were going to miss it.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Dinner was dragged out. Laura made a quick, easy dinner, but everyone ate it slowly. It seemed like no one wanted this weekend to end. Finally, you were packing up your room and saying goodbye to the Bartons. You gave the biggest hug to Lila, Nate, and Cooper, and told the eldest two you would take them swimming with sharks (out of earshot of Laura). Clint told you to call him if you needed anything and kissed you on the top of your head. Then it was Laura. The mother of three held you tight, then cupped your face in your hands. “I will see you again,” she said with such belief that you believed her. You held onto her wrist with one hand, unable to make a promise you weren’t sure you could keep. “And remember what I told you.”

“We are family,” you whispered.

“Yes, we are,” she pulled you in for one more hug. “Stay strong, sweet girl, you got this.” You blew out a deep breath and nodded against her. It hurt to pull yourself out of her arms and follow Yelena, Bucky, and Natasha onto the jet. Luckily, Bucky and Natasha took the cockpit, so you followed Yelena to the seats. She made sure your bags were put away, then buckled in. “Natasha is a -,” she paused when she looked at you and saw tears in your eyes.

“Nothin’,” you tried to push the tears away, but they fell down your cheek. “Uh, Laura reminds me of my mom, so I uh-” you blew a raspberry out. “Sorry, this is so stupid.” You pushed the palms of your hands to your eyes.

“It is not stupid,” Yelena gently pulled your hands away. Can you tell me about her? Your mom, I mean.”

“Really?” you asked. Yelena nodded and kissed some of the tears away. “Well, she was my best friend.” And, you thought, I wish she could have met you.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Back at the tower, you put your stuff in your living room and said hello to Wanda before heading down to Tony’s lap. You watched Tony move around his space with music blasting, unaware you were there. It gave you a chance to observe him. This was the man the media and the world couldn’t see or refused to acknowledge. The man behind Iron Man, Stark Industries, and the Avengers. The human behind everything. You remembered you witnessed a college protest against Stark Industries and their involvement in the construction of weapons that were killing innocent people. You were proud to witness the peaceful protest then, but now you understand that war and fighting are complicated. There were no winners when blood was shed. Sometimes you forget that a different Tony met your mom at a different point in her life. “Hey kiddo,” Tony said as he finally saw you, and FRIDAY turned down the music. The billionaire hugged you quickly. “How are the Mormons? How are you feeling?” His eyes scanned you over.

“Iowa was good,” you said, walking over to one of the bean bags and dropping down on one. I got sick—just once, though, which honestly is not bad considering everything. Did Dr. Carpenter call you?” The man shook his head and sat next to you. He wants me not to skip a week and continue with the new treatment plan.”

“How do you feel about that?” Yelena asked you the same question. Sighing, you shrugged.

“I trust him,” you said. “So I’ll do it, but I would have liked a break.” Before he could say more, you fished a piece of paper from your pocket. “Here,” you handed it to him. “I finished it on the way home.” You closed your eyes as he looked at the sketch of the Black Widow suit you designed.

You’ve been staring at it for so long that you could draw it with your eyes closed. The most significant change from their original suit was functionality over style. It was lightweight and had armor similar to the Black Panther nanosuit. To you, it made sense with all of the physical hand-to-hand combat they experienced. There were subtle red undertones for Natasha, and Yelena had white. The Black Widow symbol was removed. Their boots allowed for more noise-dampening and better climbing. The signature Widow Bites were sleeker, now integrated directly into their gloves.

“These are incredible,” you opened your eyes as you heard him stand up suddenly. “We can start building them today. I may have to reach out to Shuri, but we can start with the basics,” you giggled at the man’s excitement. “Do you want to help? Unless you have somewhere else to be.”

“Nope,” you stood up. “Right where I want to be.” His smile was infectious.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

You weren’t sure how Tony could work such long hours in the lab. A headache was forming from all the lights and screens. But you were able to make good progress before Kate came running in. Tony was able to hide the project. “Are you good at darts?” The archer. You pointed to yourself. “Yes, you. Yelena said you were amazing at the pool. Do those kills translate to darts?”

“Uh,” you dragged out. “Kind of.” Darts were okay. Not your favorite game, but bars were more likely to have a dart board due to space.

“Amazing,” Kate clapped her hands together. “Alright, Stark, you’re coming too. It’s game time.” Tony huffed and rolled your eyes.

“Come on,” Tony said to you. “Before reinforcements come down.” You were so confused, but you followed him out of the lab. It was how you found yourself at a dart tournament between the Avengers. It was held outside at the covered heated patio. Music was playing. Tony was behind the bar serving drinks, and when you weren’t playing, Yelena held you hostage with her arms around your waist.

It seemed wild that this was your life now. Months and years spent alone, now you were surrounded by so much love.

Taglist: @likemick, @averagetmblrusser, @wandaromamoff69, @simpforyelenabelova, @cd-4848, @simpforyelenabelova@nymph0puppp, @sparks123123 @person-005

#Yelena belova x reader #yelena belova x you #yelena belova x female!reader #yelena belova x stark!reader #yelena belova #white widow

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glacierberries · 2 months ago

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partial premise of a diabolical sirius/james/severus fic where

it's a muggle au, and severus recently moved into this small town. a few years prior, lily gives him the number of this guy she plays an online game with. (which is cause it ended up being a game severus was more interested in than lily, so she thought he could play with someone else)

and so, for a few years, severus and this guy text each other. first, it starts off with just discussions of the game, but severus doesn't have an expensive set-up, so he can only play when he goes over to lily's house. so this guy gradually opens up about his home life and other things. severus finds out that this guy is rebellious and he he has a younger brother. the guy also says that his mother favours his younger brother. so severus also gradually opens up about his shitty home situation and they end up becoming really close friends.

so anyways, eileen breaks it off with tobias, and she gets a job at another town. severus is around 18 at this time and he gets a job at a cafeteria for extra money and moves to a new school

it turns out that in this new school, hes not easily accepted. theres a guy named james potter who keeps trying to bully him. luckily, severus has a few friends in his corner and competent teachers that do their job.

severus finds out that this james guy is really rich and he feels repulsed by his behaviour. but james has a friend named sirius and he's the most gorgeous guy he's ever seen, but he's cruel. and unfortunatelyy severus starts fancying him. like... yeah, he nearly gets severus killed in a car accident, and james is the one that 'saves' him... but like......... urgh who was he kidding, it would never amount to anything. would it?

and hes just having a hard time at school. and the thing is.. severus' online friend starts texting him more frequently, asking why severus doesnt text him as much anymore, (he has school) when he can come online (next time he sees lily) and if they could ever meet up (not yettt). and severus also sometimes complains about his homework and stuff and everything just goes on as normal.

to make matter worse, however, he soon realises that the place where he works at.. is RIGGHT across the street from james' house. great. wonderful. awesome, even.

and James, the bastard, eventually realises this particularly juicy piece of information when he randomly walks in on a monday morning to buy cold coffee. he catches severus wearing a work uniform and starts making fun of his Poorness. it's so exhausting, the next he goes to school and there are printed out creepshots of him taking orders from customers pasted onto the whiteboard. trust james potter to be a creep. he rolls his eyes because it isnt even that bad, but it's also annoying. (lucius looks at him with something akin to pity for the rest of the day and severus wants to pluck every single perfect piece of hair from his head) posh pricks, the whole lot of them.

he thinks james would leave him alone after that but nooo, hes just always there, trying to make jokes and falling flat. trying to distract him and make him mess up his order. tugging his hair out of his ponytail so that he has to re tie it. it's aggravating and severus thinks james would get tired of it but no, he doesnt.

so severus just gets used to his annoying presence. then for one week, james disappears. it's during the school holidays, so he doesnt see james at school either. strangely, for the whole week, his online friend doesnt answer his texts, either.

severus gets weirdly anxious, but tries to overload himself with more work and tries to finish his school projects. he texts lily and she says shes found a boyfriend and hes from severus' school. severus is happy for her.

finally, when his online friend answers, it's to say that he's run away from home and that he's staying at his friend's place. severus feels bad for him and sends him condolences and says that he's glad he's safe.

then, the week passes and one sunday morning, james enters the shop with sirius. they both look really tired and worn out. severus wants to ask questions, but he refrains and bites his lip. he doesnt want to ruin his morning with their sarcasm and hostility.

james sees him and quirks a small smile. he looks sad, severus notices, but doesnt comment. and the funniest thing ever happens. james and sirius come up to the counter to place their orders, and sirius blurts out that severus doesnt look too bad in his work uniform. theres a heavy silence and both james and severus flush, but sirius just says it like it's a fact. granted, he does look half dead, his eyebags are massive. but he still looks as hot as ever, severus notes with disappointment. he suddenly notes with mounting horror that james doesnt look too bad either. What the fuck???

after james and sirius go find a seat in a corner, severus pulls out his phone. to distract himself, he texts his online friend. and strangely, a notification sounds rings across the quiet cafe at the same time. and sirius pulls out his phone. james frowns, pouting a little. and severus shrugs it off. he sends another message. ANOTHER notification sound. strange. very strange indeed. his friend, who goes by the name of padfoot sends him something funny. and sirius is grinning at his phone.

okay.

Wait.

severus' stomach plummets. because what the actual fuck?

he sends another message. sirius' notification sound goes off again. james is irritatedly telling him to shut his phone off. sirius laughs and puts the phone back in his pocket. severus, meanwhile, is frozen. his head is spinning. because what do you MEAN sirius black was severus' second ever real friend?

sirius who was filthy rich. sirius who never missed a chance to mock him. sirius who sometimes went too far and had to be stopped by James of all people. he feels like crying. it can't be sirius black the guy whom he lowkey fancies and who is someone who would probably never look in his direction?

severus decides he knows what to do

#ok bye im going to sleep #i might write this actually #i don't know if i should post a conclusion or just write the whole thing. ignore the typos my keyboard is being annoying #hmm lots of thoughts #snirius #jeverus #and prongsfoot #well it's #starprincechaser

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anettzzt · 1 month ago

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Imagine Cat and Laila leaving the house to meet Cat's relatives. Jeremy is being busy with his uni homework and has no time to say goodbye to the girls.

Jean entered the room and hugged Jeremy around the neck from behind. Jeremy recognized Jean immediately. By his hands. Jeremy had still felt Jean's last touch on his skin, so when slightly cool and rough hands wrapped around Jeremy's neck and went down to the collarbones, it felt more right than ever.

Jeremy closed his laptop. “What are you doing?”. Jean couldn't see his face but he could swear he heard a smile on Jeremy's lips.

“Cat told me to tell you not to overload yourself.”

Jeremy turned his chair around to meet Jean's gaze . He would have lost himself in his eyes if he could. Jeremy thought that no poet would ever describe his feelings at that moment.

Jeremy grabber Jean's chain with the cross on his neck and pulled him closer.

All his problems disappeared when his and Jean's lips met. He allowed himself to experience all the emotions and not think about anything except the cool hands on his warm shoulders and the sense of peace he learned from being with Jean.

#all for the game #jerejean #jean moreau #jeremy knox #headcanon #aftg #tsc #tgr #i can't write

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glowettee · 5 months ago

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💌 glowettee hotline issue #002: finding yourself after burn-out

(a few other details have been given to me, ex: elle woods dreams, however i didn't show that <3)

hi darling, hope you're having a lovely day!!

i'm so grateful you reached out with your question today, because it sounds like you're feeling so lost and burnt out rn. i totally understand how it feels to have been that motivated, gifted student who reached for the sky, and now feel like nothing is worth it. i've been there too, and i know that sometimes the pressure, burnout, and inner doubts can really weigh you down. so, hopefully some honest and detailed advice from me can help you get back on track with your schooling, reignite that spark, and start working towards your elle woods dreams. like being in a good headspace, working out consistently, and even acing those grades.

⊹₊⟡⋆finding yourself after burn-out⊹₊⟡⋆

by mindy @glowettee (glowettee hotline, submit here for personal advice: https://bit.ly/glowetteehotline)

𐙚taking a moment to acknowledge your feelings𐙚

firstly, darling, it’s important to know that it’s okay to feel this way. burnout and feeling lost isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a sign that you’ve been giving so much of yourself and that you might need a little break or a new approach. sometimes we set expectations that are so high that when we’re not meeting them, we feel like failures. remember, your value isn’t determined by your grades or how perfectly you stick to your plan.

• allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling without judgement. • consider writing down your thoughts in a journal; sometimes putting our feelings on paper can be really cathartic. • remind yourself that this phase is temporary and that you literally have the strength to overcome it.

2. 𐙚reassessing your goals and dreams𐙚

i know you once had a sky-high vision and a deep motivation to be someone amazing. now, it might feel like those dreams are just too far away. but sometimes, our dreams need a bit of tweaking to fit our current circumstances.

• break down your big dreams into smaller, manageable goals. instead of focusing on becoming a straight a student all at once, set smaller targets like improving one subject at a time. • create a vision board (physical or digital) with images, quotes, and ideas that inspire you. having a visual reminder of what you want can help reignite your passion. • remember that it's perfectly okay for your goals to evolve. just because you're facing challenges now doesn't mean you can't dream big; it might just mean your approach needs to change.

3. 𐙚creating a gentle routine to ease the burn𐙚

burnout often comes when our routines get overwhelming. it might be time to build a daily ritual that’s gentle, supportive, and kind to your mind and body.

• start your day with small but meaningful tasks-- like enjoying a quiet cup of tea or a few minutes of meditation. • plan out a simple schedule that includes time for homework, self-care, exercise (even a short walk counts), and hobbies. try not to overload your day. • integrate movement into your routine in a way that feels fun rather than forced. you might consider a fun dance routine, a brisk walk with your favorite playlist, or even a short yoga session. • create reminders throughout your day to take breaks. a five-minute pause can do wonders for your energy. • set a bedtime that lets you recharge. sleep is crucial for healing burnout and for any brain that’s trying to keep up with the pressure of school.

4. 𐙚finding support in unexpected places𐙚

feeling isolated and like you’re nothing can be incredibly draining, especially when you feel like you’re handling everything on your own. i truly believe that finding a little support can be the key to rediscovering your inner strength.

• reach out to someone you trust: a teacher, a counselor, a friend, or even a family member. sometimes just talking about how you feel can lift a huge weight off your shoulders. • consider joining a study group or club at school that interests you. surrounding yourself with peers who share your passion can remind you how valuable your unique perspective is. • if you ever feel like your burnout is taking a toll on your mental health, know that professional support (like a school counselor or therapist) can really help you navigate these feelings. i know many wonderful people who have benefited from this kind of support. • remember that social media can be a wonderful place for community: maybe look into supportive online communities or even tumblr groups where people share tips on academic success and self-care. (i have a tumblr community: https://www.tumblr.com/join/E5N0qIqo)

5. 𐙚rediscovering your self-worth through self-care𐙚

self-care is so much more than a trendy phrase, it’s the practice of honoring your own well-being, emotionally, mentally, and physically. here’s how you can start to rebuild that lost sense of self-worth:

• create a self-care checklist that you can refer to daily. it might include: 1. writing down three things you love about yourself. 2. spending 10 minutes in meditation or deep breathing. 3. enjoying a favorite hobby without feeling guilty about it. 4. treating yourself to something small, like a delicious snack or a relaxing bath. • sometimes, the little things make the biggest difference. consider allowing yourself guilt-free breaks where you watch a short, funny video or read something that makes you smile. • remember that exercise and physical self-care go hand in hand with mental clarity. you mentioned wanting to work out consistently, maybe set a modest goal like a 15-minute workout a few times a week, and gradually build from there. • affirmations are a powerful tool. start your day by saying out loud, "i am enough" or "i deserve to take care of myself." it might seem silly at first, but these little words can change your mindset over time. (i have a post here: confident affirmations post)

6. 𐙚re-engaging with your studies𐙚

it sounds like skipping classes has now become a coping mechanism for you, but i truly believe you can find a way back to feeling engaged and motivated in your studies. here are a few tips:

• set small, time-bound goals. if getting back to a full schedule feels overwhelming, start small. commit to attending classes or studying for 20 minutes at a time. • create a study space that feels calm and inviting. decorate it in a way that makes you happy. a few pretty trinkets, soft lighting, or even a little plant can transform the energy of the room. • try mixing up your study methods. if reading aloud feels tiring, incorporate videos, podcasts, or interactive websites to bring the material to life. sometimes changing the medium can make learning exciting again. (i have a post for study methods i use here: study techniques post) • form a study group with classmates who motivate each other. you might be pleasantly surprised to find that others also feel burnt out, and together you can create a supportive environment where no one feels alone. • keep track of small wins. maybe your grades have dropped, but celebrate every little improvement, no matter how small. acknowledging progress can build momentum for more success.

7. 𐙚embracing imperfection and healing𐙚

it's important to remember that no one is perfect. especially during times of stress and transition. your past self, the intelligent girl who reached for the sky, still lives within you. she’s just taking a pause to breathe and heal.

• forgive yourself for not feeling perfect right now. let go of the idea that you must constantly be at your best. giving yourself permission to rest is a form of strength, not weakness. • gradually, let yourself embrace imperfection by trying new things without the fear of failing. each small step, even if it’s a completed homework assignment or simply showing up to class, it all counts towards the bigger picture. • involve yourself in activities that make your heart sing. sometimes, engaging in something creative (like writing, painting, or dancing) can remind you of the beautiful person you are becoming. • remember that healing isn’t linear. there might be days when you feel like you’re back to square one, and that’s ok. every day is a new opportunity to try again.

8. 𐙚planning for a brighter future𐙚

dreaming of living your elle woods dreams isn’t just about achieving the impossible, it’s about building a life that feels good for you. consider these points as you plan for the future:

• break down your dream life into actionable steps. maybe start with a workout schedule, then gradually build academic goals, or plan little self-reward moments when you hit a milestone. • research inspirational stories of others who faced burnout and came back stronger. in reading about how others’ve reclaimed their motivation, you might find the encouragement you need • visualize your future success. each night, take a few minutes to imagine your ideal day, feeling energized, focused, and happy. this visualization can work as a beacon of hope on tougher days. • maintain a flexible plan. life can be unpredictable, so allow your goals to evolve as you grow. sometimes, the path to success isn’t a straight line but a winding trail full of learning curves.

i know how overwhelming it feels when burnout takes hold, so here are 10, in-depth ideas from my own journey that i truly believe can guide you back to feeling motivated and inspired.

micro-adventure journal i started a micro-adventure journal at a time when every day felt like a repeat of the last, and it completely changed my perspective. instead of fixating on those huge, far-off goals that seemed so intimidating, i began documenting the little adventures that brightened my day. sometimes, it was just noticing the way sunlight reflected on my window during a brief walk or savoring a new flavor at a cozy coffee shop. writing down these moments, adding little doodles or quotes that resonated with me, slowly built up a treasure trove of memories. on days when you feel like nothing is happening, i promise you this journal will remind you that life is made up of countless small wonders that add up to something truly beautiful.

no-pressure creativity hour i learned that setting aside an hour solely for creative play can be magically healing. this isn’t about perfect art or fancy projects, it’s simply a time to let your inner child roam free, to explore, experiment, and laugh without judgment. i remember one day, i spent an hour painting with watercolors, not caring if i made any sense of it all, just letting the colors mix and blend in their own way. that creative hour lifted a weight off my shoulders and reminded me that learning and living can be playful. try dedicating a regular slot to just be creative, and watch how it helps dissolve the relentless pressure of perfect performance.

sensory sanctuary in your space i truly believe in the power of a personal haven, a little corner where you can retreat and simply be. in my room, i carved out a tiny space with soft lighting, a gently scented candle, and a comfortable cushion where i can sit with my thoughts. this sensory sanctuary became my go-to spot when the demands of school or life felt too heavy. each time i sat there, i let the gentle aromas, the quiet ambience, and the tangible warmth remind me that i deserve moments of pure calm. creating your own sensory oasis, even if it’s a small part of your room, can be a daily reminder that your wellbeing matters and that you always deserve a break.

unexpected wins jar i made a little unexpected wins jar during one of my most challenging periods. every time something good happened, even if it was a smile from a friend, a completed assignment i thought was impossible, or even a moment of self-realization, i wrote it down on a small piece of paper and dropped it into the jar. on days when negativity overwhelmed me, i would pull out one of those notes and read it, it would immediately make me happy. this simple ritual transformed how i valued small victories and helped me start each day with a better sense of hope and gratitude.

learning buddy ritual no one should have to face these overwhelming feelings alone, which is why i reached out to a friend who was also struggling. we decided to become learning buddies, meeting regularly just to chat, share our frustrations, and even tackle our schoolwork together in a low-pressure setting. we celebrated each small win together, and on tougher days, just knowing that someone else understood me made a world of difference. having a sincere connection like this helped both of us see our academic challenges in a kinder, more manageable light.

future-self letters one of the most touching practices i embraced was writing letters to my future self. during a very trying phase, i sat down and poured my heart out, describing my struggles, my hopes, and my dreams without holding back. i sealed those letters with a promise to read them at a later date, maybe a few months or even a year later. when i finally opened them, i was amazed at how much i had grown and changed; those letters became a time capsule of resilience and hope. i encourage you to try this, as it can serve as a powerful reminder of your inner strength and the progress that often goes unseen day to day.

regular energy audits i began scheduling weekly "energy audits" as a way to truly understand the ebbs and flows of my own wellbeing. each sunday evening, i spent some quiet moments reflecting on the week, what drained me, what lifted me up, and what small actions made a noticeable difference. this self-reflection allowed me to adjust my routine mindfully, prioritizing the moments that truly nurtured my spirit. you can learn to schedule your tasks and breaks in a way that honors your energy. it’s like having a personal blueprint that guides you to where you feel most alive.

⊹₊⟡⋆final thoughts⊹₊⟡⋆

i truly hope these personal tips resonate with you and help you reconnect with the brilliant, motivated self that’s still inside, even on days when you feel lost. each idea here comes from a place of deep personal experience, and while every journey is unique, i believe that these practices can create gentle shifts toward rediscovering your inner light. take your time with each one, be kind to yourself through the process, and remember that every small step forward is a victory.

sending all love and all the good vibes!! feel free to reach out anytime, i'm always here to listen and help you through these twists and turns.

xoxo, mindy 🤍

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year ago

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AITA for refusing to do anything to help my roommate's baby?

More of a "was I an asshole" rather than "am I an asshole?"

I (21F) am a college student living in an apartment with two roommates, Anna (22F) and Mica (23NB). I've lived with Anna for two years now and Mica for one, and we've all always gotten along great with no major issues apart from the fact that Anna's boyfriend of several years is emotionally manipulative and incredibly insecure and jealous, but that's an issue for another time, except that I don't like him and make no secret of it. I also don't like children, never want children, and crying babies is one of the biggest overload/meltdown triggers I have because it stresses me out and also triggers some violent intrusive thoughts (I have autism and OCD, which both of my roommates know about, but never cause any significant issues and I don't act on those thoughts.) That is to say, I should not and do not want to be around children.

Anna and I live far enough apart over the summer that we only see each other during the school year, and this year I'm a junior and she's a senior. I showed up at the beginning of this school year and lo and behold, Anna is about five months pregnant. Turns out it happened toward the end of last school year, she didn't tell anyone at first, and didn't bother to mention it over the summer (which I'm pissed about). I was NOT expecting one of my closest college friends to be about to have a baby, let alone one that I'm living with.

For the next few months, I helped her out, drove her to doctor appointments, etc, because of course the shitbag boyfriend lives like three hours away (where Anna lives when she's not at college) and refuses to drive over to help her out himself. However, I made it clear that I wanted nothing to do with the baby once it's born. I wouldn't be helping her with diapers, wouldn't babysit, don't want her to put formula bottles on my shelf in the fridge, won't play with the baby or anything. I don't have the patience for that, I don't want the baby in my shit, I work 20 hours a week on top of my classes and homework and do not have time or desire to deal with a tiny human.

Fast forward to when the baby is born, Anna keeps saying she's looking for somewhere else to move, wants to move back full time to live with her shitbag boyfriend, have him help with the baby. Our other roommate Mica helps occasionally with the baby and is willing to do basic stuff and occasionally rocks him to sleep when they're sitting on the couch and stuff, but I refuse. Several months later Anna still hasn't moved out and has barely made the effort she says she will, she talks about the boyfriend a lot but I have literally NEVER seen him in person since the baby was born (he was there for the birth and that's it, drove her to our apartment afterwards since I didn't want to be there, then left again).

If there's ever a time when I'd be the only one home at the apartment and Anna asks me to babysit for a little while, I change plans and always leave so I'm not there even if it just means doing homework at the campus library instead of my room. Anna is exhausted and literally does nothing around the house anymore, never comes grocery shopping with Mica and I because she refuses to leave the baby home alone but doesn't want to take him to the store, I'm doing all of her dishes cause apparently she can't do that either, she asks us to do her laundry and cook dinner and everything for her now and I feel like we're being treated/put into the role of the baby's father.

I cannot stand children, I don't think Anna has any excuse for trying to make us care for her child, she seems to expect us to take care of him while she's in class and she can barely even afford her own share of rent and groceries and stuff let alone a baby (or hiring childcare), and I made it clear even before the baby was born that I wanted nothing to do with him and will not engage with him or do anything for him, and I think my "it's your fault you had a baby, sucks for you, now deal with the consequences" attitude is what might make me an asshole here but I'm so exhausted and my mental energy is always drained from the damn kid screaming and crying and making a mess of the house.

Mica talked to me privately recently and mentioned that they understand that I don't like children and that they're also upset with the fact that Anna can't take care of a child herself when she's a full time college student without a job and a shitty boyfriend who's barely in the picture, but they want me to try to engage more and have a bit of sympathy for Anna and not leave her completely stranded with an infant. I don't want children, I don't want to live with one, and don't want to have to care for one.

It's now April as of writing this and I have since moved out of the apartment (Anna and Mica still live together), I left in January at the start of spring semester when on-campus dorm housing was available and live with another friend whose roommate transferred the prior semester. I still see Anna around campus but I feel like the baby completely ruined our friendship but I still hang out with Mica a lot and occasionally get updates that way. I'm much happier, my mental health is better, and I'm not living constantly stressed and on edge because of the baby, and Anna still hasn't moved in with her boyfriend despite saying she's trying to for months now.

Was I an asshole for refusing to support my roommate and her baby, and essentially giving the ultimatum of "either the baby goes or I do?"

#aita #am i the asshole #eyestrain

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xcaffeineandcuddlesx · 4 months ago

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♬ i bet on losing dogs - mitski, your best american girl - mitski ♬

healing from heroism

ch. 1

- evening, the undercroft -

“do you… think i’m good?”

the question stuns me. it’s not perplexing, nor unsurprising, but i’ve never considered it. of course, objectively, i believe he’s good. he’s sebastian sallow, for merlin’s sake. headstrong and making sacrifice after sacrifice even if it’s not his own because he’s relentless, driven by love. he’s always had good intentions no matter how he achieved what he wanted. even if it meant lying to his best friend. even if that meant manipulating people like me. even if it meant killing his uncle.

“i’m sorry?” i ask in return, unsure if i heard it correctly.

how could i not? it’s silent otherwise. merely a low crackle of a fire in the undercroft’s makeshift hearth and a ticking clock somewhere, but it’s just us. I shift to face him more directly as we lounge on a sofa, the tall stacks of books and some miscellaneous homework long forgotten as we had drifted into thoughtful silence.

i can see the misery, though. his downcast eyes being filled with such despair, such conflict.

“please, i need you to be honest with me. am i good?… am i a good person?” his voice cracks and it’s a painful reminder that things weren’t supposed to happen as they did. not that either of us needed another reminder.

the end of our fifth year is coming too quickly to an end. the classes are becoming shorter, more of a blur as the days fade away like smoke in the wind. it’s disorientating and the disassociation we’re experiencing is weighing heavily on every aspect of our lives. most days, it’s like i’m floating through the halls, like i’m in a weird sensory deprived dream as the faces and voices turn unrecognizable, like muffled buzzing, not even sure of the day of the week. the o.w.l.s came and went, i think, and now the both of us are left wandering the castle, trying to pick up the broken pieces of our youth.

the students are ecstatic about the upcoming summer, and every mention of their plans gouges a small part of me out, carving deep until i’m hollow. i hear them talk over meals about their family’s summer houses or trips they’ve planned, the promises of exchanged owls and slumber parties. all the while, i’m being congratulated by faces i’m not even sure i’ve seen.

my first year introduced into a world of whimsy and i become the “hero of hogwarts”. most have no idea the things i had to do to earn such a title. it’s made me sick. physically, mentally, emotionally sick. the late nights, overloaded course work, expectations, favors, expeditions with classmates, watching the cruelty of poachers, raids, battles, trials, death threats from adults in full confidence of them knowing i’m only a student, the blood on my hands.

i couldn’t just stop it once i had begun. i couldn’t just return to safety behind the castle’s walls and resume classwork as though the safety of every man, woman, and child in the school, neighbouring towns, and highlands were at stake and i was the only one trusted to, expected to, and even capable of coming to the rescue.

i didn’t sign up for this. neither did he.

we weren’t supposed to face the world the way we did. we weren’t supposed to do the adult’s jobs, no matter how grown we believed we were. we weren’t supposed to be heroes, we were supposed to be kids.

that’s what we are; kids.

he’s just a boy. a crestfallen, scared, mournful, alone, and traumatized boy.

so now isn’t the time to define what “good” means or to explain that the world isn’t comprised of black and white or “good” or “bad”, but of horribly muddied shades of grey that are entirely up to perception. he doesn’t want to hear about the intricacies of morality. he wants to be reminded he’s still capable of being loved.

i can’t possibly look at him the same way. nor can he look at me the same he did at the beginning of the year. i’m nowhere near a saint, but perhaps our histories is what makes us perfect for each other. after all, the pot shouldn’t dare be the one to call the kettle black.

“of course you are, seb,” i attempt to soothe him, mustering as much emotion as i could. he nods, hearing what i said, but not as through he believed it.

the conversation was difficult to hold after that. i knew he wanted to say more. he wanted to repeat his offenses and for me to kiss away the worries anyhow. he wanted to remind me of what he’s done and push me away, to self sabotage his growth to have an excuse to hide away like a recluse without shame. he wanted- no, he needed more. he needed someone, now more than ever. he needed me. needed to be told he’s human beneath it all, that his blood bleeds red the same as everyone else’s and isn’t tainted black like he believes. he needs to be reminded that he not only can be loved, but that he is.

it’s been especially hard since ominis has left us to our own devices for now, needing a break to rationalize his life and choices. neither of us can blame him.

i feel… nothing. nothing at all and everything all at once. i’m spread thin. i’m doing all i can to be here for sebastian and still preoccupied with my own life and loss. professor fig died. he died and i know it wasn’t because of me, but if only i was a little quicker, a little stronger, a little wiser. if only, if only, if only. i knew him for only a few months, but he’s been paramount to my new life. he was a beloved teacher that truly dedicated his time to the betterment of his students. i feel that his avoidable death is pinned on me. i was supposed to a savior and his blood has stained my hands like all the others have. what good are my abilities if i can’t even save those that help me? what good are they if i can’t even maintain normalcy?

nothing has been the same. not me, not sebastian, not ominis, not anne, not the faculty, and certainly not my relationship.

we’re closer than ever, i suppose, but how close is close when each of our minds are wandering light years apart?

sebastian fiddles with the corners of the parchment he’s been toying with for the last hour. it’s another drafted letter for anne. an apology, first step towards reconciliation, a goodbye, self-justification, explanation, i haven’t any clue at this point with how many he’s written.

he’s defeated and solemn, like how you would expect a kicked puppy to look: vulnerable and strangely still trusting despite it all. he looks the part, too. his close are wrinkled, eyes are sunken and devoid of the typical glint of happy mischief, cheeks stained with hours of silent tears, hair tousled, his nose reddened from the constant weeping-induced nose running, and lips chapped from dehydration.

there’s no book that could ever teach someone to manage this type of pain, this level of compiled guilt and shame. we weren’t born with the know how on gluing the pieces back together one by one when your entire world falls apart.

so i do the only thing i know i can to help. i take the note from him and set it down, the ink having long been ruined with blotched mixes of tears and ink, and pull him into a hug.

the sound he makes, heart wrenching, is never one anyone would expect to hear from him. halfway between a choked sob and stifled breath, he lets his face fall on my shoulder and unashamedly breaks.

his body convulses, racked with forceful and raw barks of pain.

i have to blink away several tears myself as he crumbles, what little composure he had left tearing and ripping at the seams. the lump in my throat is hard to ignore as i fear it may strangle me soon. he grips at the loose fabric of my uniform where he’s hugging me, grounding himself to the only constant he has in his life right now.

with one hand making small strokes up and down his back, i use my other to smooth down his hair, holding him close to me.

“i didn’t mean to… i didn’t want to become a bad person,” he manages through shaky breaths and hiccups. “ca-can’t even go home now. haven’t got anyone else to go to.”

“i know, baby, i know.”

i couldn’t maintain a brave face for him and began to sniffle. we were a mess. holding each other and breaking down like the world was ending because for us, it was.

when it’s just the two of us, hero of hogwarts and brave (former) best duelist of the castle, we could let our facade fall away, knowing nobody else could truly grasp the weight on our shoulders. we don’t have to be a formidable duo when it’s just us. we don’t have to pretend like the other isn’t broken seemingly beyond repair.

i eventually lean back, letting him lay across me as he cries until my blouse is soggy. until he’s exhausted and limp.

i try to quiet my whimpering to not wake him, but i can’t help but think of where i’ll go after this. even if i do go back home, my parents wouldn’t understand, they couldn’t possibly.

i’m so different from the person i was merely a handful of months ago. my hair is shorter, poorly chopped after being singed too many times in battle, and my hands are rough with callouses and scabs. i’m unsure how much of my former self i still resemble. at the very least, i know that i have more skin covered in scars than i do freckles and that i have new muscle growth from the running, climbing, borderline parkour, and combat.

i definitely don’t think, act, or speak the same way i did before. i’m not the same bright and eager little girl my parents had proudly gushed over when i received my letter. i can’t go home like this and risk breaking their hearts. i can’t just resume my life like i haven’t done the things i’ve done.

i remember reading of a spell called “obliviate”…

not too sure what i want to do with this yet, but i have an idea of where it’ll go ! i have a bit more in writing, so it may become a mini series of sorts? i’m not sure how well i like this prompt, but i wanted to put it out there anyhow because broken seb is my emotional support animal rn.

please give any feedback and tips you have !!

there’s so much potential with both of their stories and i know angsty seb is popular, but there’s more to him than masked anger and guilt. he would be hardest on himself and begin a downwards spiral, searching for validation that he’s not as bad as he thinks he is.

don’t get me wrong, i love a good seb x mc that’s joyful and loving, but i also love to put characters into hypothetical snow globes and shake it real hard.

stay happy and hydrated,

xoxo ellie

#hogwarts legacy #hogwarts legacy game #hogwarts legacy fanfic #hogwarts legacy sebastian #sebastian sallow #hogwarts legacy seb #sebastian sallow x mc #sebastian sallow x reader #sebastian sallow x you #whump #whump writing #whump tropes #Spotify

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