#hopefully it doesnt look terrible lol

[tellioari]

Radio

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[rzyraffek]

Slashers witam autistic s/o

Because guess who just got diagnosed👁👁

S/o has they/them pronouns! Request are open!

Billy and Stu would be such chaotic duo! Like Stu constantly forgets that s/o doesnt like loud noises and Billy whacks him everytime he acidently yells. But Stu isnt that bad cuz he loves all them hyperfixations! If s/o loves bugs he will lisen them rant about bugs for hours, if they are hyperfixated on cars he 100% will let them Snoop around his car engine (even if s/o is planing On planting bomb isnside he doesnt care). They both may crack few Jokes about autism but only if they know s/o is comfortable with it

Micheal is 100% on spectrum anyways. He respects boundaries(at first maybe nah, but its not like he was planing a healthy relationship from start) if s/o hates light? Hes fine in darkness! Tv or music is too loud? Well silence doesnt bother him anyways! My man was in asylum before human rights where a thing,those places have a lot of People with huge needs if it comes to overstymulation and ig he already kinda knows how it works? Hes been there for long time :( if s/o collects stuff for example rocks he will give them the shiniest the most stunning rocks he could find

Brahms My men would be so curious about them! He already meets new people rarley! He never met somone on the spectrum! He is a bit too over the moon, no clue what he was expecting. But im sure he hes some hopefully with not outdated info books! Anything that can overstimulate them is g o n e . too bright? Good thing we have thicc curtains! Some food just looks and feels terrible? Just call Malcolm or brahms will .It's very quiet here but if its too quiet he has some Old music discs! You both can dance together! Also he finds s/o stims kinda cute

Billy Lenz has no clue what it is and how it works BUT he memorises patterns that make s/o uncomfy. Like if he knows that something bothers them its litteraly gone. Yeah he doesnt connect dots and just thinks that they are quirky and a bit sensitive (he never read book in his entire life)

Yautja kinda same to Billy-he never heard of autism so he just figured that s/o act like that bcs of their funky personality (which is great). He found some muting headphes for them while he was on earth and he can easly change lighting on the ship! Also if s/o has hyperfixation on anything like history biology geography languages he is going to sit and lisen to it ALL especially about biology of earth Animals! He even takes notes lol

[marrow-minded]

Kinda wish they showed Jaune and Ruby talk about Penny but eh maybe next Volume since Jaune's arc was mostly about being growing mentally and becoming whole again, also I hope they generally have Jaune act more mature and protective cause he was like 29 or 39 and he should have like a fatherly presence around people like Oscar that's just me tho

im begging on my hands and knees for the writers to please let jaune act like he has 10-20 years more life experience regardless of wether it was in the ever after. no more of this "jaunes terrible at combat" bullshit let my mans go hog wild. let him be a really aware leader now that he spent a couple decades constantly being on his guard. and yeah i think it would be excellent if he had a more fatherly/big brotherly vibe to oscar-- sometimes i remember the way oscar looked up to jaune in early v5, when ruby said that jaune also doesnt have his semblance and they can both work hard at it :') we were robbed of jaune and oscar brotherly bonding and training towards opening their semblances (imagine if we had gotten a scene of jaune reciting the prayer pyrrha said and unlocked Oscars aura,,, ill cry i wish we had gotten that instead of the dumb as fuck headbutt scene 😭😭😭 setting up both jaune and oscars growth with their semblance/auras is a better use of time than ruby headbutting mercury lets be honest)

as for next volume... im wondering if this is going to actually be a time skip like people are saying or if maybe... just maybe... rwby and jaune have been thrown BACK in time... pre fall of atlas. in a volume of reactionary writing, it wouldnt shock me if they try and rewind the tape so to speak. maybe ruby and jaune wont have to talk about penny, bc penny is still alive?,, i dunno thats probably a crack theory but its not IMPOSSIBLE i mean we just spent a volume in a fucking other dimension that was never set up prior, time travel isnt that crazy LOL

but yeah. heres hoping that v9 wasnt a completely waste of my time and both jaune AND ruby act like they went through major psychological and physical trauma and not that everything is magically fine now!!!

and hopefully they all get new outfits; i wish jaune had kept his long hair but at least they let him keep the gray streaks :') i think it looks nice

[callipraxia]

okay I’m here to thank you. Do you remember that post from like a Long Time Ago where you talked about what inks you used to plan/outline fwjb on paper? well, a few days after I heard about that, I went to the nearest store and bought the shittiest composition notebook and highlighters you’ve ever fucking seen in your life. then I forgot about it for like a very, Very long time. that's important context.

I suddenly remember it existed three days ago. I picked it up, decorated it, and colored two full pages of marker because. because well why not. The first couple pages are soaked in ink my bad. anyways—I finally decided to start actually WRITING in it, in PENCIL, because while actual writing notebooks would be a lot better than a Fucking Composition Notebook, I’m pinched. so. I did that. and guess what?!? it helped! it fucking helped! my weird ass outlines On Paper! I figured out a WHOLE Three Act Structure for do you remember hanging up the stars, AND have begun loosely sorting all of the POVs I have in the search for future reference. like?!? oh god it’s so helpful to have something I can Look At. very shitty picture attached (ignore the gagging mess of handwriting, never grew out of third grade cursive hybrid lettering, you might not even be able to read it--) (this is for the stars)

so… thank you! this was very helpful and that wasn’t your intention with the post but fuck all I Listened. you’ve got organized writing a lot more than I do, lol. will possibly take More Notes in the future…! :)

oh Wow now im getting feelings from showing off my handwriting to a public for the first time. hopefully this doesnt unlock and unbridled the terrible ordeal of being known anxiety! /lh

Ooh, cool! And your handwriting’s quite nice and very legible, so don’t be anxiety about it!

Composition books are also perfectly valid forms of writing notebook. I’m writing the first draft of Tracey’s journal in one, actually, because that’s the kind of notebook he’s writing in in-universe, and the McGucket memoir’s on a purple legal pad. The FWJB outlines and notes, meanwhile, were written mostly on loose sheets of printer paper, gathered into a folder (which proved invaluable as a supplement for my memory, which went into full leaky-faucet mode for a while halfway or so through IE cos COVID/2022 being Just The Worst Year). Most of my one-shots are written in my tiniest handwriting on bits of scrap paper, including a number of those alignment sheets the printer spits out when you plug it in. As much as I love good-quality notebooks, they aren’t always the right tool for the job…especially if you just hoard them and never deem any idea good enough to ‘waste’ them on (I’m convinced that getting the FWJB notebooks on clearance sale was directly tied psychologically to my willingness to actually use them, somehow or the other).

[happi-meals]

Freeze flashing less than lively strawberries!

🍓❄️🍓❄️

Tbh I messed up big time forgetting to put these in the fridge while I was at work. So they stayed in my car in a plastic bag for like 4 hours and only a few are left in somewhat edible condition lol.

I'm not terribly sad or disappointed tho, as I mainly got these to experiment with more smoothie recipes and flavors. Strawberries arent a favorite fruit of mine but I do like the taste sometimes. I got these from the market and figured I can learn how to store these in the freezer if I find no use for them soon, which is likely. I tried to salvage the better pickings by cutting off a few mushy parts that werent too mushy, iykwim. Hopefully that wont prove fatal to my plans lol.

I plan to make another drink tomorrow, perhaps putting a strawberry or two in there. But first i'm "flash freezing" this batch I have. I rinsed them, then washed them in a vinegar solution (3:1 parts water and white vinegar) and rinsed them off again. As I type this I'm realizing I forgot to dry the poor things so hopefully that doesnt fuck with anything lol.

But as I said (and as I had to reconcile lol), this is a learning experience for me. I looked up several articles for some guidance on how to best prepare and store the fruit. I'll def take advantage of freezing, but since this was for smoothies later, I'll prolly get through them in time until buying more next week!

I saw many farmers selling sprouts and seeds at the market and I bought one to try my hand at growing. So one day I'll be brave enough and purchase a strawberry plant to grow my own for more smoothies and other recipes!

Lets hope the berries will make it through the night!

[sleepy-time-tea-bear]

New strategy to deal with my unis albleist attendance policy: if you cant beat them, confuse them. Have a migraine that wont go away but you have to be in the room with overhead light? Pass out on your desk lol (they will hardly notice but you might get some weird looks from people sitting next to you). Got such terrible anxiety you havent been able to eat for days? That's fine, obviously showing up to watch a lecturer read slides for 2 hours is more important. You can always just start crying halfway through and have a panic attack in front of an entire room full of people. Got your period? Haha it's fine, your pain doesnt matter when weighed against your productivity. Go to the class until you feel blood literally leaking down your leg, and leave to throw up in the bathroom. Hopefully you'll still get that tick next to your name that proves you were a good little student who prioritises their work above silly things like health and wellbeing.

[kangals]

2020 resolution: get more f r u f f y 

[gayregis]

emhyr found wigless in nilfgaard

[oriigirii]

Streamer MC headcannons with the brothers 💞

"You were quite a known face on social media back in the human realm, playing games, doing unboxings, just vibin in general, fans around the globe looked forward to your streams a lot! However, considering the sudden (unannounced) invitation to the exchange program, you had to leave all of that behind out of the blue. It wasn't as bad at first, but you have to admit you do miss the feeling of being able to do goofy shit online. Luckily for you, with the advance technology of Devildom and some spicy magic, the internet had synced with the human realm, and thats when you decided to finally re-enter the streaming scene. How will the brothers react upon seeing your peculiar past time?"

Head empty, No thoughts aside from the brothers just bothering the MC while they stream so here you go haha

Warnings: None, just crackhead energy and a lotta mispellings

Gender: Neutral!

Hotel: Trivago

* [ ಠ╭╮ಠ ] Lucifer *

{How did he know about your career?}

I honestly don't see him as someone who goes on the internet a lot

(He screams boomer to me, change my mind)

He doesn't have the time either, he's too focused on work!

So him finding out is gonna take a while

But! He did find out the hard way when shrilled screaming was heard from your room when he was passing by with some paper stacks in his arms (courtesy of Diavolo)

This man felt his instincts kick in, he ran as fast as he could, papers forgotten, and he immediately slammed your door open. Splinters scattering around, your door definitely damaged, as his eyes held a glare and his demon form was out, wings spread in a threatening display.

He was ready to beat someone's ass as he had thought someone had hurt you in here.

But all hes met with is you, infront of your chair and PC, and a game over on the screen...

To say he was unamused was an understatement cause you just lost your internet priviliges for giving him a heart attack (He said it was because you were being rowdy and noisy but with what you saw you knew that wasn't the case)

Good luck tryna puppy-eye your way to his heart to let you continue streaming lol.

If by some miracle you managed to wriggle your rights back from his hands, he'd warn you not to be so loud next time.

You already learnt your lesson though~ (Hopefully)

{How does he feel about your streams?}

Not everyone's the same, so if you were the shy soft streamer who does more art streams or something akin to a podcast, you can bet that Lucifer will be putting you on while he works, he kinda knows your streaming schedule at this point and if you were running late, he'd force one of his brothers to take over your dish washing duties or any chores you were stuck with

If you were the loud obnoxious meme type, hed still try to watch out of curiosity, and as much as he appreciates that you were getting comfortable here in Devildom with how you laugh and joke around, he still can't approve of it. Its too loud, its much like his brothers energy and he has enough of that already, so he probably doesn't watch as much.

He has countlessly came to your room to shush you and at this point your fans had made a compilation of each time Lucifer had barged in to tell you off

Look he likes it when you scream, but not when hes in the middle of work okay--

At this point, chat has deemed Lucifer as dad and you as their mom/dad.

If he ever catches wind of this he'd definitely be teasing you in private for centuries to come.

Overall fine with it, as long as don't do something stupid on stream.

* ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ Mammon*

{How did he know about your career?}

I would say he found out by him crashing into your streams midway but that's too predictable, hence why you've Mammon-proofed your bedroom during streaming hours!

Thanks to our wizard daddy, you have managed to cast a simple lock spell on your door and as well as a sound proofing

You love your broke idiot, but you did wanna keep the tone of your stream today a bit more chill, you wanted to have a proper Q&A with your fans to hopefully clear any bad vibes around your 3 month disappearance.

When Mammon has learnt your door was locked he definitely was a bit pissy, he knocked on your door loudly even and was calling out for you to let him in, but to no avail.

Bro he's scared.

He usually was allowed to enter, and you usually answered if you did need to be left alone for a bit, so just leaving him hanging got his mind racing and he had to press up his ear on the wooden door to try and hear if you were okay

When this continues on he finally resorts to getting help, but the only one in the house ws Levi, so he kicks down HIS door.

Levi boutta summon Lotan for interrupting him honestly

But as Mammon exclaim you weren't answering and he worried for your wellbeing, Levi rolls his eyes and scoffs,

"Idiot Mammon, they're streaming don't bother them…"

Streaming? why didn't you tell him???

Rude much.

He did huff and now was forcing his way to use Levi's PC for a moment

Can Levi stop him?

Nah.

He was busy on his console, and if he stood up now hed be breaking his world record so he was at a terrible state so he just resorts to threats of him drowning the Avatar of Greed if he does anything stupid on his PC.

He immediately logs in to your streaming platform and he watches for a bit,

You were more dolled up now just to look decent on stream, and he felt this jealousy rise as you interact with your chat, especially to those saying I love you's and stuff, and you even said it back? the audacity! You were his werent you? Were you replacing him with these nobodies?

He huffs as he realized that those who paid got their message highlighted, and thus, he starts donating. (Mind you this was Levi's account...)

"Mcccccc Open the dooorrr"

"Ill behave i promiseeeee"

"Cmon pleaseeee?"

Chat is c o n f u s i o n

NGL, they thought Mammon was a creepy stalker and red flags were being waved everywhere

but as chat was pondering who the hell he was, you can only sigh and look at the camera with that unamused expression, but ugh! you just KNOW hes doing that kicked puppy expression of his, and maybe it really wont be so bad

So you snap your fingers and say, "Okay MonMon, its open, Im giving you 3 seconds"

Mammon wasnt deemed to be the fastest out of his brothers for nothing

As soon as you got to '2', you were already tackled by the white haired male and chat went wild.

Now that you've shown your life in Devildom, maybe its time to introduce chat to your boyfriend no?

{How does he feel about your streams?}

You get paid to sit infront of a camera, do I have to say anything else?

But really though, as much as he enjoys the thought of getting so much cash from something so simple, he prefers the joy of being able to proudly exclaim that he was your first man!

ohhhh he thrives on the salt of your overly attached stans

but for those who fully support you, he always feels so mushy and shy when they say the ship you guys so hard

The fanarts has him WEAK (he may or may not have saved a few)

You usually do streams alone, but now you've allowed the door to be left open to let Mammon join whenever

Chat pogs when he enters with so much confidence, only for it to crumble when you kiss his cheek on stream.

Overall finds it fun to spend time with you, but just dont play scary games cause Lucifer might hang him upside down on stream.

* ▘▂▝ Leviathan*

{How did he know about your career?}

He is honestly the most attached to his D.D.D and he catches wind of almost anything going down in the internet, so your 'revival' being hyped up was something he definitely saw and he was just s wo o o ned

His Henry 2.0? a famous streamer?

Were you truly a blessing gifted upon him or was he dreaming?

He definitely didn't bring it up at first as he didn't wanna make it a big deal, but you notice hes been more in his head lately, and you have tried asking him what it was but to no avail.

You have to corner this little snake if you want answers and he eventually admits that he knew of your persona online and was incredibly shy to ask you to stream with him

He's a streamer himself afterall but maybe he doesnt stream as much as you do nor does he have as large of a following, so his intrusive thoughts attacked him and made him think that maybe since he wasnt as famous he didnt deserve to be in the same stream as you

Please tell him to join you and gib him kiss U3U

He'll absolutely m e l t

But now, as you make the announcement to your viewers and Levi to his, the internet explodes as a special collab stream was hapening between the expert gamer and avatar of envy of Devildom along with the beloved exchange student and streamer of the human realm

Your usual viewers reach between 10-15k, but as you start stream, that number boosts higher and beyond

Before streaming though, Levi was incredibly nervous, he'd picked the games for you to play that he knew you would enjoy with him, but his mind kept racing about whatthe fans thought, he didnt wanna disappoint them

But you had to remind him that whatever they say will not matter in the end as this was merely for fun, this was YOUR stream and you guys were gonna do what you want and nobody can have a say on it. (Maybe except Lucifer)

You usually talk for him with your bubbly personality, and to calm his nerves, he hs your pinky wraped around his where the camera can't see it.

Regardless, his thoughts subsided as you two delve into your stream that lasted a solid 7 hours, you definitely promised your chat that you and Levi will be doing more streams together from now on.

Once the cameras cut and yall are left alone, Both of you collapse on bed, and despite you being asleep already, Levi was just far too giddy as everything dwells on him.

Having a player 2 by his side now had never felt so intoxicating and he as just so lucky to have you.

{How does he feel about your streams?}

He obviously adores it, although some streams he wouldnt join just so he can play games on his own

He's still an introvert afterall, he needs his alone time

But he prefers that alone time with you, his Henry.

So when youre about to go stream, he kinda becomes a bit pouty, but with a simple promise of kisses (and maybe even more if youd like) he would let you go, but his attention would disappear from his game altogether.

He might just end up watching you instead

May or may not, at some point, just chat you and ask if its too late to join you

You do allow him to join you and play from the comforts of his room as both of you can simply play via internet, you give him the comfort to not turn on his mic or webcam either and you have no idea how he appreciates that.

Will definitely fight someone online when they start claiming you as theirs (-cough- stans) Please make sure it doesnt escalate to him summoning Lotan

Although the comments would often get to him, and as much as he can fight them online, he still does find himself pondering if they were true, so you need to give him a lotta lovin and reminder that he is your player 1 and no one else can ever fill that place.

------

Wow 3 brothers this time, what an improvement, anyways hope yall enjoy! I think its pretty clear who I simp for depending o nthe length of each lol, but do let me know if you guys want a part 2 for the rest of the brothers, or even the undateables!

[alienaiver]

How do you feel about raisins?

Iwaizumi Hajime x gn!reader summary: you were a reporter sent to observe and interview Japan’s Men National Volleyball Team who had gathered for the Olympics and Iwaizumi is very attracted to you but is good at making a little fool out of himself.

warnings: uh, atsumu hits on you for two seconds, your handwriting is bad, not beta’d wordcount: 2.4k words content: fluff, post-timeskip, Iwaizumi Hajime (27) Athletic Trainer got me feeling some kind of way, Meet Cute, Gender Neutral reader, I honestly have no idea what an athletic trainer does tho, this is me WINGING IT. if ur a pro in this area of work i apologize, its pure guess work, i also dont know how a reporter works lmao

notes: i made this post three months ago, claiming i was about to write it as soon as i got time (lol). iwaizumi knows he’s hot and i stand by that statement tho it doesnt change that he’s still terribly awkward! i hope you enjoy this, i wrote it over the span of 8 hours so some parts may not make as much sense as i’d like! have fun!

__

When Iwaizumi was appointed to handle Japan’s National Volleyball team, his pride surged. This was what he wanted to do, what he had spent years planning to do. Through the years he’d ruined his share of semi-successful relationships by being so focused on his job and goals - even being told off by Oikawa of all people, the man who haven’t had a steady partner for more than six months - often, due to his obsession with volleyball so really! Who was he to talk? Iwaizumi was perfectly content spending most of his time with athletes and other various sports people.

That was, of course, until you came along.

You, who were perfectly polite, professional, kind and funny in so many ways that just had to translate into your personal life as well. After the national team had been put together for the Olympics and started their practices, you showed up with the job of observing the team for an article and to interview every member, coach and otherwise involved people - including Iwaizumi, their athletic trainer of course. Now, Iwaizumi wasn’t necessarily against interviews per se but he was sweating buckets at the thought of perhaps being surveyed, studied by a person he found so attractive and appealing. Iwaizumi wasn’t a stranger to getting crushes or meeting attractive people. He’d had his fair share of flings, so he wasn’t completely unaccustomed to being around people he was interested in but being around someone whose whole point of being there was to talk with him about him? That was cause for some concern and nervousness for sure. At the end of relationships he’d always been told he was rough to the touch, all fringed around the margins of his being so casual flings were easier for him, they didn’t have to get to know him, they could simply admire the still surface of superficiality awarded by his looks (even without the reminders from Oikawa whenever a relationship ended, he was well aware of what kind of delicious hunk he was – though those were Oikawa’s words, not his).

You were supposed to be joining them at the gym for a few weeks, during as much of the interviewing without disrupting too much of their practice schedule so much of your time was spent with your notebook on the bench next to where Iwaizumi usually were when he wasn’t involved with a specific team member.

You always seemed interested in small talk, trying to engage him in several unimportant conversations - he’d eagerly (hopefully not too eagerly) join in on them, showing you his best smile and taking extra care to speak with a confident, calm and - hopefully - attractive tone towards you. Though that fell right through the cracks as he too often, mid-conversation, had to raise his voice to ungodly decibels and yell at Atsumu to start taking the current exercise seriously or for Hinata to stop teasing Kageyama. The national team was a chaotic and rowdy bunch in need of much reining from both coaches and trainers, but you always just laughed at them and wrote things down in your notebook whenever he was otherwise engaged.

Once, Iwaizumi had allowed himself a peek towards your notebook while you were busy writing in it and failed to hold back a laugh spilling out from him. You’d looked up at him with a confused expression and a slightly raised eyebrow and he’d instantly apologize, “I’m sorry, your handwriting’s really bad. Think it’s worse than Shittykawa’s,” he’d told you, realizing as soon as he the words had left his mouth that in no way would that ever be considered an apology under any circumstances. He hurriedly cleared his throat and got ready to really apologize when you barked out a laugh and scratched your neck, “yeah, I actually got myself a tablet a few years back because of that, it becomes too unintelligible if I don’t write them in shortly after. I just never got around to actually… use it for that.”

Iwaizumi was sure he lucked out that day, the conversation going in the direction of who Shittykawa was instead of his rude statement. Oikawa had always been an easy subject for him, he was (begrudgingly) his best friend after all, and he had lots of stories to tell about their shared adventures together through most of their lives. He didn’t notice how you had looked on in complete and utter curiosity, soaking in every detail about him you possibly could - completely foregoing your job of observing the volleyball players and instead zoning into the childhood memories of one very kind and attractive Iwaizumi Hajime.

A few days after that you’d shown up for morning practice with two coffees in hand. Atsumu had instantly swooped into your personal space, thanking you for the generous cup of coffee he would be sure to enjoy while thinking of you. You’d retracted your arm from his reach with a laugh, “this one’s for Iwaizumi, dummy! He probably needs it to cope with your energy levels this early in the morning.” Atsumu had then proceeded to dramatically fall to the floor while calling Iwaizumi over, “it’s tragic! I’m being demoted and for what to take my place? Some kind of a Godzilla-type beast!” with his arm covering his face, he proceeded to make sounds that you assumed was supposed to sound like crying, “you sound way more pathetic when you actually cry, Miya. Get your ass up and do your stretches like everyone else,” to which Hinata made a weird kind of squawk before he started laughing with Bokuto as Atsumu slithered back to them begrudgingly.

That left you and Iwaizumi standing in front of each other, “for the record, I think Godzilla’s the coolest,” you half-whispered as some kind of secret between the two of you and Iwaizumi was surprised at how much his cheeks and ears started burning – he felt so hot that he was sure it was very visible and very obvious so he hurriedly and mechanically reached out for the coffee and thanked you with a bow (why did he do that?) before shuffling back to his usual spot by the bench.

The next morning he expected you to show up ten minutes later than him as you usually did with a smile and a greeting but after 30 minutes he started to accept that you weren’t coming in today and, with a slightly grumpier than usual attitude, went about the day. As he was going through Ushijima’s diet plan, Atsumu and Hinata passed with Atsumu letting out a low whistle, “is it rough being without your date to make you laugh and smile and blush?” He was about to smack him with his clipboard when Ushijima opened his mouth, “oh, you’re dating the reporter? Congratulations.” Iwaizumi could feel his blood pressure rising, a deep scowl settling nicely on his features, “fuck off Miya. And no, Ushijima, we aren’t. It’s been about their article, nothing else.”

“But you like them, right?” Hinata asks excitedly, his expression border lining on pure joy, “you should ask them out!” he adds, Atsumu clapping his hands together, “yeah! Since they obviously have bad taste and isn’t interested in me, I support your relationship!” Hinata slapped him on the back of his head for that one, saving Iwaizumi the trouble. They continued to talk about date spots until Iwaizumi couldn’t handle anymore talk about it and yelled at them to let him do his work. Ushijima luckily didn’t have anything more to say on the matter and simply continued their conversation prior to the other’s arrival. As the workday ended and he sat in the train, reading through some documents, his mind wandered to you and how he wouldn’t exactly mind dating you. None of you had discussed romantic subjects but Iwaizumi was convinced you had to be taken, so he shut down the daydreaming immediately and flipped the page.

Two days after that came the time where he was going to be interviewed by you, and he had spent at least an hour picking out the pants he was going to wear – luckily he didn’t have to worry about a shirt, since he could just use the uniform shirt that symbolized he was the team’s athletic trainer. Should he go with tight pants? No, that would look weird in the gym, not to mention that tight jeans wouldn’t go unnoticed by his team and the comments he was sure to face would just embarrass him further. But at the same time, joggers felt so… lazy. He wanted to look good and impress you, right? Then he shouldn’t show up in his usual Sunday wear. After an hour trying on his (limited) array of different pants, he ended up with the ones he’d been wearing the past few days – he realized that you’d practically seen him everyday for a few weeks where he hadn’t thought his choice of pants through at all and showed up in casual black slacks.

The interview went surprisingly well and smooth, both of you being what felt like naturally professional in the setting, especially compared to your lax interactions through your time at the gym with him, but Iwaizumi was happy with the kind of questions you asked and you seemed eager with his throughout descriptions and answers – they were so much more comprehensible than some of the player’s answers which mostly consisted of sound effects, vague descriptions of excitement or content at being part of the team.

You leaned over to turn off the recorder while smiling at him. As you turned it off you looked Iwaizumi in the eyes and he suddenly felt like he was on trial, “did I do alright?” he asked nervously, adjusting his shirt collar. Your smile grew, “yeah it was perfect! Now I just need to interview the physical therapist and I’m… actually done! Or, I mean, I will have to finish writing the actual article first but, yeah,” you laughed and Iwaizumi’s smile fell a little at the realization that being done also meant he probably wouldn’t see you again, “well, I’ll look forward to reading it!”

He cleared his throat as he got up from the chair, you mirroring his actions. As he was about to turn around and head back towards the gym from the lobby, a small “w-wait!” escaped you, your voice squeakier than he’d heard it before. He looked at you, you who’d been confident and assertive the past weeks suddenly looked so… nervous? Your eyes were screwed shut, fidgeting with the notebook you cradled to your chest and Iwaizumi almost got whiplash when he realized what was going on. He’d seen it before, the avoidance of eye contact, the stuttering and fidgeting – you were about to ask him out. You were going to ask him out. You were interested in him, him! Iwaizumi Hajime! He was so caught up in that realization that he didn’t hear what you said and simply just stared dumbfounded at you. When he came to all you said was, “I mean, it’s totally fair if you’re not interested! I just thought I’d take the chance and ask since tomorrow is my last day here and all. But don’t feel pressured to go on a date with me!”

He was panicking. By being unresponsive he’d given you the idea that he wasn’t interested – which couldn’t be farther from the truth! He needed to think fast, needed to make sure it really got through to you that he wanted to date you as well so without thinking he blurted out a pick up line, one taught to him by Oikawa in middle school when he had his first crush,

“How do you feel about raisins?” he rushed out and you looked at him with a puzzled expression, “they’re fine… I… guess?” you raised an eyebrow at him, not entirely sure where he was going with this.

“Yea? What about…. dates?”

___

Seeing Oikawa’s sixth call going through his phone, Iwaizumi decided to take pity and answer the phone for once. It was around 6PM in Japan so he knew that Oikawa just woke up in Argentina. “Iwa-chan! How could you block me on Facebook!?” Iwaizumi winced, “news travel fast, huh?” he simply replied, scrolling through his e-mails. As Oikawa was yelling at him dramatically, Iwaizumi sighed at the number of unread e-mails, 452 unopened mails. Wow, I should really start to delete spam mails.. he was pulled back into the conversation when Oikawa called his full name, “I’m serious, Iwa-chan, why did you block me?”

“How do you even know? Didn’t you just wake up?”

“That’s obviously besides the point!”

“I was mad at you. You’re a bad friend.”

“What? We haven’t spoken in a week, what could I possibly have done to you today?” he gasped, getting a realization, “Iwa-chan do you miss me? Have I not contacte-” “Cut it out, it’s not about you specifically.” Iwaizumi sighed as he massaged his temple. Oikawa could be 18 thousand kilometers away from him and yet still drain him from energy.

“...I met someone.”

Oikawa practically squealed in the other end and Iwaizumi had to get the phone away from his ear, “I met someone and they asked me out but I panicked and … do you remember in middle school? When I had that crush on Minene? And you gave me advice on how to woo them? The whole ‘what’s your opinion on dates’, thing? Yeah, I panicked today when they asked me out and just… threw that goddamn pick up line after them! It’s your fault!” He could feel his irrational anger from when he blocked him earlier pop back up and he had to remind himself to take a deep breath and count to 10. “I’m so happy for you! What are they like?” “Pretty… fun… anyways! I’m not talking to you! I’m going to be mad a while longer, now leave me alone. Go get a tan or something!” Iwaizumi ended the call and put the phone on his desk. Yeah, he’d already forgiven the idiot from his (obviously misplaced) anger but he decided that unblocking him could wait a few more hours.

His phone lit up again and he clicked his tongue, expecting it to be his worst best friend but it was your contact info that popped up with a text instead,

Next Sunday at 11AM? :)

[carry-on-my-wayward-butt]

I just found out I'm 5 weeks after a few cycles of trying. I knew it would be rough but ur kind of scaring me now lol. I always hear mothers saying stuff like "Pregnancy was the best!" or "I miss being pregnant!" and people do it over and over again, so there must be something to love about it. Right?

Of course! there’s plenty to love about it:

many people lament the changes their body goes through during pregnancy, especially the bump growing. personally? i fucking love it. literally i’ve never loved the way my body looks more than right now, and i used to be fit as fuck. i was sleek and curvy and all sorts of hot, i look EXACTLY the opposite now and yet i LOVE it.

the dips of my stretch marks, my huge slowly rounding belly, my jiggle thighs, my muffin top hips spilling over my pants, my skin is SO fucking soft, i seriously cant keep my hands off myself. if my tits werent plagued by lymphedema i’d probably love them too, but in a sleep bra they look sooooo good in my new maternity shirts. ESPECIALLY ruffle blouses. i genuinely adore the way i look heavily pregnant, and i will absolutely miss it terribly.

i mentioned before that i hate the rolls and swishes (especially the stretches) but i LOVE kicks. seeing my belly move around is surreal and kind of freaky, but in an amazing way. kicks are so... assertive. “i’m here! i’m alright! i’m growing patiently! i’m exercising!” it’s so soothing to know they’re doing well in there, in a place i can’t reach them. i’ll poke them back and they’ll react! it’s so sweet. getting kicked in the butthole isnt so sweet, but i do think its funny tbh.

learning their routine in there is so nice in a weird way. i know what foods they react strongly to(baby loves spicy), and how they react to light. they like to settle on one side of my belly button or the other, and i can feel their head (or ass?) just hanging out there. resting. i can caress my baby through my skin. it’s gross but its so lovely.

i get to park in the expectant parking spots heehee >:3c (i already have a blue badge, but when the blue spots are full, there’s still a close space for me most of the time) i always do an evil little laugh when i pull in like im doing crimes.

my hair still falls out, but not nearly as much as it did pre-pregnancy. it gets greasy a lot slower too.

i still get pimples, but not nearly as many as i did pre-pregnancy. (T1 doesnt count. T1 was like Puberty 2. hopefully yours isnt as blegh)

i’m compelled beyond understanding to drink TONS of water. I have never drank this much daily water in my LIFE. i am extremely hydrated and feel healthy.

i’m compelled beyond understanding to get into the sunlight. i stand outside for a few moments on sunny days and feel like im photosynthesizing. i never did this before now.

im generally more optimistic rather than doomscrolling my own brain for hours a day.

i feel more responsible, i feel like the decisions i make have a future in mind rather than impulsivity. i feel purposeful. my mental health has improved drastically.

i eat so much more fruit than i used to

my sleep is plagued by nightmares sure but i sleep SO fast now. it used to take me hours to fall asleep. now it’s mere minutes. is this how the other side lives???

people are way more willing to help me, and other parents readily and eagerly answer a complete strangers random questions like “was that expensive? is it easy to use? does it fit in your car well?” that from any other person would feel upsetting and invasive. i was looking at nipple balm confusedly in target a few months ago and a total stranger called out to me and asked if i needed help, then pointed out which are vegan, which have this or that ingredient, which allergens to be aware of, which have a strong smell, which were oily or lotion-y, and when i picked one (earth mama butter) just said “great choice, you’re gonna smell so good. good luck babe!” and left with her cute toddler who was happily chanting “nip-ple, nip-ple, nip-ple,”. ideal interaction. i still think about that woman. she smelled like cheerios and strawberries.

there’s plenty to love and enjoy, just like theres plenty to hate and be miserable about.

and when it comes to people who say “pregnancy was the best! i miss it!” i personally have a feeling that if it’s not because of stigma of looking “unappreciative” of pregnancy, it is because keeping an infant alive is fucking miserable, and parenting blows chunks. i’m sure that comparatively, being extremely uncomfortable and in pain for the better part of a year might actually have been the best part for them, even if they had the roughest parts.

i’ll definitely miss the way i currently feel about my body. i’ll miss the QUIET for sure, and the idleness. and ill miss sleeping so soundly, even if there’s nightmares. i’ll miss getting to shirk chores because my body hurts, and i’ll miss having 100% of my husband’s attention, but he’ll miss having 100% of mine too so at least its fair.

but........ i won’t be doing this again :^) at least unless i have free healthcare, because my GOD the bills are OUTRAGEOUS. fuck that shit.

congrats on your success, anon. it’s a rollercoaster.

[clumsyclifford]

u know what. i will give u all the lore u want. i’m 18, will be 19 decently soon so we are close to the same age. also the other band was r5. i have sent u asks about them and tde in the past. i followed you for atl content and got whiplash when u started posting about the first band i ever loved. i was like 10 when their first album dropped i have been around for entirely too long. i had a wattpad account and wrote r5 fanfic from the tender age of like 11-13. i discovered 5sos i don’t even remember how but i think the funniest part about it is that i never really got into their music?? i got into them as people by watching like interviews and compilations. and i mean at this point that was a While ago. SPEAKING OF FANFIC i did that like ao3 year in review thing like a month ago??? and you were my top author of the year so far. i read a lot of fic on ao3. your fics are very lovely and some of my favs. moving on. will not lie my music taste is kinda embarrassing and has barely changed since i was like 14 lmfao. been listening to a lot of waterparks lately. have been since their album dropped in may. i essentially go through phases of listening to solely one artist. or one playlist i made. most recently my taste has consisted of a lot of all time low, waterparks, paramore + hayley’s solo music (it really had to grow on me BUT now that it has it is very good), also been on a nostalgic r5 kick as well. hot take it has been quite difficult for me to get into tde’s music and i don’t really know why. some songs i absolutely adore (omg plz don’t come around is my fav by them. also scared of heights, feel you now, welcome to the end of your life are top songs too) but others i’m just. i have never liked preacher man and it’s the first song they released after they rebranded in like 2017. i love to see them finally free to do what they love music-wise but some of it is just. hard to listen to. i’m supposed to see them live in november (like 4 days before my birthday, kinda cool) and it’s the second time the show has been rescheduled so hopefully it happens. i’ve seen them live before but not since they rebranded. they’re dropping an album in october that i will have like a month to learn so it better be a fucking banger. now i’m just rambling about tde because i love ross and rocky with my entire being. rydel is annoying these days tho. also she named her baby fucking SUPER what kind of name is that why would you do that to a child. anyways. you ever need useless random r5 lore, i’m the person to ask. it’s the effect of being around to like a band for like 8 years. in conclusion my music taste? terrible. a cluster fuck. i will listen to luke’s solo album next time i’m focusing on a task because i like listening to new music when i’m concentrating on something. there’s some other bella lore for the day. - other bella

OH ALSO yeah idk. i’m currently on mobile. when i looked at your blog on mobile the first time last night it was blue. but now it’s pink. i have yet to see it on desktop but when i do i am sure it will be equally as pretty. - other bella again

hell YES some other bella lore. let's dig in

oooooh how soon? whens your birthday? 👀👀👀

ahhh yes i do remember the r5 asks !!!! that was a fun little era of clumsyclifford content huh. dont worry i wrote 1d fic on wattpad from ages 11-13 as well sooo same hat. that is super funny tho actually that you never bothered to listen to their music u really were staying loyal to r5 good for you

ao3 year in review???????????? say more?????? what is this?????????? thats very flattering regardless omg im going to ask you what your favorites are because im a leo just kidding its because i crave validation and im curious what ones you read/have read. also thank you for reading my fics lol

oh yeah theres a new parx album!! i dont listen actively to them but i really like all the parx music i know. im scared to get really into them because im genuinely afraid to fall in love with awsten knight. like im not joking thats the reason. i have to listen to more of their music tho cos i really enjoy what i know so...if you have recs...👀 i'm listening

mm thats a good lineup of music to listen to!! paramore is another band i never got super into, i meant to and then i listened to all of riot and then i learned that hayley williams is like pretty christian and that a few paramore songs are more christian than i anticipated and now i'm like. on the fence about it all. but i wanna listen to after laughter i just havent gotten around to it yet. and i did like riot. i like paramore. i like dead horse by hayley, i didnt like the other single she released, and i didnt listen to her solo music because i didnt like the first single so im not sure if i would actually like it? i am accepting vibe checks in that category though i dont really know what kinda music it is. actually now that im thinking about it doesnt she have two albums now???? i feel like the answer is yes. anyway. moving on

that is very fair the thing abt the tde stuff is that it's all so interesting and so different from every other tde song like they really just do something unique in each song which i think is awesome but also makes it hard to like every song bc it's not like one universal vibe you kinda have to decide for each song if you're enjoying it or not. i do LOVEEEE tde though, im very jealous that you're seeing them perform. although i dont know why im not, just looked it up and theyre gonna be in new york on november 24th which is a sunday so i miiiight.....be able to go.......maybe...........their website says the 25th which is a monday so maybe i was under the impression the show was on a monday?? but the ticket site says sunday. 👀 we will just...have to see......what we see.............

ANYWAY

RIGHT im so excited for their album i was mistakenly thinking it was coming out the same night as luke's but it was just the new single which i really liked on a first listen but have to listen to again cos ive only heard it the one time. but i hope it fucks. they announced that the album is called girlfriend which personally i think is really fun so i have high hopes

SHE NAMED HER CHILD FUCKIN WHAT NOW???????????????

wait eight years thats a long time but also thats roughly how long ive been around 1d wtf........insane. madness. and in fairness probably roughly how long ive been around 5sos but i took a hiatus from both of those bands during high school so im not sure how much i can count all of those years. ive been around all time low for six years though, that's pretty good. anywayyyy i hope you like luke's album but no pressure man listen whenever you feel like it. LOVE YOU

[kyunsies]

Hey mädch! How are you today? An 8 hour class sounds terrible. I have a hard time focusing in a two hour class how did you survive an 8 hour class? Doesnt the person who is teaching get tired of teaching for 8 hours? Did they give you any breaks between? Like for lunch. Also do you have plans for the weekend or will just take a break and relax. I want to go to the beach but the weather isn’t looking so good . The only day that won’t be cloudy or rainy is like Tuesday. I just like the boardwalk at the beach though especially the ice cream and games even though I never win. the best time to go the boardwalk is at night everything is just 10x more beautiful!Anyways have a nice day and take care❤️ -🥭

hi hun !!!!!! i'm okay today !!!! i was a bit tired all throughout my class bc i kinda got sh*t sleep but we made it through !!!!!!! and don't worry lol as i said in another ask, this was only a one time class since it was in place of a usual 8 hour clinical oration - our ICU instructors were just teaching us how to read EKG strips for our ICU rotation (which was super confusing kinda ..... but practice makes perfect right !!!) ; i was feeling a little discouraged but hopefully things will click for me later on in the semester :( we had 2 ten minute breaks and then a 45 min lunch so all was okay !!!! the class actually went by really fast lol ; and for the weekend !!!! tomorrow i'm going out for coffee <3 and then probably finish up some hw i have that's due on sunday and then that's it :) it will be nice relaxing :)

awww bub ;____; i really hope u are able to go to the boardwalk soon before it gets cold ;____; it's been really rainy here bc of the tropical storm that has been sweeping the east coast , but it was finally warm and sunny today ! hopefully that comes to u soon too <3 have a nice day as well bub hopefully u have a fun weekend !!!!! i'll be here <3

[thelastpilot]

Piiiiiiloooooooooot!!!! You're making me sad! I've been waiting to hear you talk about your story since you got on your plane and said you'd write something big up later XD

haha yes! Okay I’m sorry i totally forgot about that when the world exploded, and then i sat on this ask for a while longer to consider the question. I’d like to say that i have so much all fleshed out but I really don’t, so I think I’ll just highlight some story ideas that I have in general as I grapple my inability to write stuff, or rather the hesitation revolving around STARTING (ironic since that was one of the things I gave the most advice about, and looking back on it, I have followed none of it which is my problem) 

So if you don’t mind a really long post, I’m just going to post summaries and stuff about my original ideas. 

The Boy with the Bite

The story follows a boy named Caleb Fisher from the town of Tremont, where terrible things never happen, yet sometimes still do. In the shadows of the wood Caleb is the victim of a mauling with stretching consequences, and finds an unexpected ally in a talking black cat named Jack Bennett. This cat warns the boy as best he can about the dangers of the full moon but understands grimly that there are no real explanations to make it any better, not really. Now, Caleb is left with nothing as he is forced to leave his family behind and go in search of answers to new questions with strange new companions,and redefine for himself what a ‘monster’ really is.

---

((that was from an old post lol. this is the book idea I am the most serious about, the secondary contender being the same main character Caleb, but instead of involving any other characters, his companions consist entirely of dogs.

So a young, recently bitten werewolf fleeing home with no answers realizes that he’s an animal. He gains an understanding of the speech of dogs, limited though it is sometimes, and in his disorientation is arrested for trespassing. Consumed with fear over realizing these well meaning officers intend to send him home where he could potentially bring harm to his family, Caleb desperately appeals the the old police dog guarding the office. The old dog listens as the odd boy begs and cries, and stops to ask the boy if his suspicions had been correct. Were the police officers really intending on retiring him. When Caleb confirms this to be the truth, the old dog shakes himself and decides he has had no true heroics in his career, and helps the young werewolf escape. With McKinley (Captain McKinley as the old Shepard insists) at his side Caleb escapes into the world, gaining his own pack of earnest, misplaced dogs as he goes. But as supernatural threats begin to draw near, lured by the presence of another predator like themselves, Caleb must embrace the parts of himself he fears the most in order to preserve the family he has created. 

(really fond of this one but feel like it has been done maybe. that doesnt mean i SHOULDNT write it, i just consider it)

---

the third one, which i believe is the one you originally asked about is a nameless universe in which i am primarily generating OC’s along a certain set of rules.

Essentially it is a magic universe where non magic folk and magic users live together in various realms with varying levels of magic concentration. The really highly magical concentrated realm is where a lot of magic schools and buisnesses were founded and primarily where they operate, but magic users can be born to any of the realms and magic to known to everyone, even if its less prominent where they live. the main stay in the universe is the production and selling of magic items/enchatments to both magic users and non magic folk alike, forming an entire type of economic flow. thats mostly unimportant but just showcases how they co-exist

creatures and spirits that are magical in nature exist in all the realms as do animals, but it skews from mostly animals with some magical creatures, to mostly magical creatures with a few animals on a gradient of sorts. most people live right in that middle sweet spot with a little bit of everything. 

the story with my OC’s is in a magical school which mostly functions like a trade school, its considered a type of higher education you can enter right after highschool or test into halfway through highschool to finish your general ed while also taking trade classes alongside it. There you can learn the practical trades of enchantments, familiar summoning, creation and refinement of magical objects, preparing of magical components, practical spells, charms, potions, etc. Upon graduation you receive a certificate of your chosen field of study and hopefully an internship in your field. Functions like a boarding school/dorm situation/ trade school dealio 

In it we got this gang

Flint Mason- a wizard with an interest in crystals and their various magical uses, has a familiar that is a crystal lined iguana that can split apart into three little newts

Laguna Poole- a water witch who grew up in the most intensely magic area possible. Has a little trouble with average human objects as a result but loves fashion, and primarily studies water familiars and potion making. Has a frog that can also turn into an otter, i call it a frotter, its name is pud

Lucio (insert last name here cause i forgot)- a bit of a quiet lad who studies pretty intricate enchantment lines and anything ancient. Has a Church Grim who exudes creepy warnings and is totally invisible except his eyes in the dark

Ayah (insert last name here cause I forgot)- a witch who is a fantastic summoner, so much so that she accidently summoned like so many djinn, and now has five djinn who follow her in the form of pure black cats that live in her shadow and act as her familiars. 

there is one other good boy who is not done being developed yet, but i do have his familiar

The Kettle Crab

[vampireqrow-moved]

hey so I agree with a lot of the stuff in your post about the transphobia involved in the origin of the pansexual label, but I just have one question: what are the actual impacts of people with good intentions calling themselves pan? If you don't hate pansexuals and consider them bi, why type up a paragraphs long manifesto on the harms of the origin of the label if it means the same thing in the way that most non transphobic people (your audience) use it? a lot of identities can be used in transphobic ways (like bi and lesbian and anything really) and plenty of valid identities from problematic roots and evolve over time as people use them differently (queer, transsexual). so how is a person with good intentions using a not-perfect label in a way you don't like a threat to the community? if someone is using the label pan transphobically, wouldn't their bigotry exist independently? if pan people do not act in transphobic ways besides using the label pansexual, realistically what is changing if they call themselves bi beyond holier-than-thou aesthetic activism? plus, a blog on the internet isn't going to get everyone to stop identifying as pansexual, especially considering multiple prominent celebrities ID as pan. so why spend all that energy quibbling on semantics because some bi people use a slightly different word when you could be worrying about Literally anything else? just feels like you want to find something to argue about lol. extremely disappointed that I had to break a mutual

im going to respond to each thing you bring up chronologically- im not trying to nitpick or prioritize certain things you say ill just forget things if i go out of order and i dont want to miss something important. ALSO! i will be typing less formally (like keysmashes and shortening words n stuff) in this response than my og post bc its 1am as im starting to type this so im tired but i want to be clear that i am like. taking this seriously and im not like. mocking u in anyway if it could read that way?? i hope not but just in case anyways here it goes!

in terms of actual impact people with good intentions identifying as pan: honestly im not  sure the full scope of the impact this has, so ill only be speaking to what ive personally seen which might not be all. but like... id argue my younger self has good intentionals iding as pan. i wanted to support trans people, even if i didnt understand a lot of the nuance involved. as a result of this, i developed a sense of superiority over other bisexuals and a mentality that bisexuality was a primitive and lesser sexuality. that mentality is harmful, and although im not sure if it affected bisexuals around me (of which there are many most of my friends are bi ajfjfjf) its still a harmful mentality and can easily hurt people even if i specifically didnt. also using it even with good intentions, which i know many people have, still spreads and further normalizes a label that imo can not be separated from its transphobic origins. this effect is not as extreme as other forms of transphobia and biphobia by A LONG SHOT. the bi community faces a lot of other issues but that doesnt mean this one isnt worth addressing if that makes sense?

if i dont hate pansexuals: ik this is part of a larger point which i will adress but i specified this in my post bc i see a lot of other posts that are negative towards pansexuality have "i hate pan ppl" somewhere in it or a close equivalent. i do not shame these ppl for their anger, i just wanted to be clear i think a lot of pan ppl are bi ppl with good intentions choosing a label they dont fully understand based on a misunderstanding of bisexuality.

why write a paragraphs long manifesto on the harms of pansexuals origin: ok 😭😭 the real reason here is that im literally just bad at summarizing. like thats literally it. i also like talking, its a bad combination. plus ive been thinking abt this for like. over a year im not even kidding and just like i have a lot of thoughts and figured if i was going to bother making my own post instead of rbing someone elses that i might as well get everything i wanted to say off my chest. ALSO BTW i literally got an ask like a week ago that was several paragraphs long asking me to explain my thoughts on why pan was harmful and some other stuff so like. this is partially responding to that and partially just me wanting to air my grievances ? idk if thats the right expression 😔😔

why write the post if my audience of people who identify as pan arent doing it in a transphobic way ? again sorry i didnt really understand the phrasing so i hope this is a vaguely correct summary!! um but like... again imo i think pan cant be separated from its transphobia and like. again imo iding as pan is like. a transphobic action/choice? obviously one transphobic thing does mean someone necessarily is like officially a Transphobe (it CAN be depending on the action but i dont think that applies here) but that doesnt mean there arent problems with what they did. this is like very complicated, but like. someone doing something harmful without the knowlege that its harmful doesnt make that person a bigot by any means it just means they didnt know. and i feel thats the case here? a lot of ppl (myself included until recently) know next to nothing abt pansexualitys origins so a trans inclusve sexuality might seem like a safe and good bet just because they dont know too much abt it, and like? i cant hate those people cause that was me for 5+ years and djgjfjdj you just dont know what you dont know!

basically i think iding with a transphobic label is inherently a singular transphobic action that doesnt make the person transphobic by itself, but is still a transphobic instance.

a lot of identities can be used in transphobic ways like bi, lesbian, etc.: this is true and a point i attempted to make on my original post, but i might not have clear enough. my issue with pan is specifically that it is a transphobic response to a preexisting identity. lesbian isnt an attempted trans inclusive indentity that replaced an identity that already existed (which have many trans ppl identifying with the og label). transphobes can use whatever labels they want, but transphobes using a label vs a label having a transphobic origin is very different. bigots use inclusive and supporting language for their bigotry all the time but language that originated with that bigotry is worse.

many valid identities stem from problemstic origins (like transsexual and queer) but the words evolve: ok my paraphrasing is a little weird there. anyways. the thing here is that. those are slurs. reclaimed slurs that can be empowering to many people, yes, but slurs nonetheless. reclaiming a slur is taking a harmful word and wearing it as a badge of pride. first off, pansexual is not a slur (ur not implying that in anyway just. saying) and it isnt being reclaimed when people dont treat it as having harmful origins. transsexual is the way some people identify but ppl acknowlege its a slur and originates from transphobia. ppl love to act like queer isnt a slur, which is an issue in and of itself, but just. factually it has historically and is currently being used against ppl with the intent to hurt them. pansexual isnt on the same level as these and other words like the f slur, d slur, etc. pansexual originates from trans and biphobia WITHIN the community and not outside of it, and most pansexuals dont see themselves as reclaiming the title because they dont think anythings wrong with it in the first place. and reclaiming it just seems unnecessary considering its history? theres no empowerment from using pan as a label as opposed to queer or transsexual, and it just divides the bisexual community for no reason.

how is a person using a not-perfect label a threat to the community? ok i dont think its a threat but still an issue if that difference makes sense? id like to reiterate a few things ive said before, but for me personally, it made me look down on bisexuals and see them as lesser, and it made people around me see pan as the "trans inclusive" sexuality as opposed to bisexuality, and basically its usage just leads to further biphobia. is this the worst of biphobia? no!!! but its still biphobia and why not attempt to target and minimize that? i have no way to singlehandedly stop biphobia, but my post might get through to my friends who id as pan and that small thing is better than nothing.

if someone used the pan label in a transphobic way, wouldnt that bigotry be different from people using it not transphobically?: someone claiming all bi ppl are transphobic and only pan is the acceptable label is obviously a lot worse than someone iding as pan and saying bi/pan solidarity but again, the second isnt not an issue because the first one is a bigger issue, its just a smaller issue in comparison. i wouldnt say the bigotry is different, one is just worse than the other, but it still has the same problems.

if pan people dont do anything transphobic other than id as pan then what changes with iding as bi over pan other holier-than-thou activism: its just one less person using a transphobic label? which isnt that big but it might lead to their friends stopping iding as pan and cause fewer people around them to see bi as a transphobic identity. which is small scale stuff, i wont try to blow it out of proportion, but thats still a step in the right direction and hopefully more people follow with it. its not terribly huge or lifechanging but something small that may only affect the people close to you is still something rather than nothing.

a blog the internet isnt going to get people to stop iding as pan: oh absolutely not. honestly i expected to get unfollowed/blocked more than change peoples minds regarding the pan label (im surprised i only lost two followers so far honestly) but again, someone literally asked me to do this and i wanted to be clear on my stance on the label, since in the past ive been supportive of it. im not expecting the post to get more than five likes, its more directed to my followers rather than the internet as a whole. im not expecting a large impact, im hoping to change the minds of my followers and friends who id as and support the pan label. thats it. if something bigger comes from it- great! but thats not what im aiming to do.

prev point + many prominent celebrities id as pan: the first name that comes to mind is someone im not a fan of for separate reasons but thats irrelevant. i mean im repeating myself a bit but some celebrities in the past validated and made me feel excited abt my identity as a pan person when they came out, and it justified the label to me, even when i had doubts. i have never interacted with a celebrity and do not plan to change their minds abt their identity. again, my post was for my friends and followers and maybe who ever was scrolling through the biphobia tag and decided to read my post.

why spend that much energy worrying abt the pan label instead of something else: ive spent waaaaay more energy thinking abt a singular meme i didnt like regarding my favourite rwby character so like. maybe i just overreact to things lol. maybe i have a lot of energy and since i cant talk my friends ears off abt my favourite fruits or the different voting methods i learned in my math class or what would dreams taste like, then i gotta put my energy into something. idk. i have a lot of energy and honestly? this didnt take that much. but i felt it weighing on me as my friends talked positively abt the pan label, when i felt guilty for the superiority i felt over my bi friends INCLUDING my best friend and favourite person in the world so like. i spent enough energy worrying abt it, and like. in hindsight since its been over 12 hours since posting it, im thinking abt it less. i was more worried abt feeling dishonest with my friends than actually worrying abt pansexuality, but i figured i owed them an explanation for why my feelings around it had changed.

just feels like you want to find something to argue about: okay i DO love arguing but im not pulling this out of my ass for fun. its in response to posts ive seen on my dash, asks i recieved abt pansexuality, and my way of letting people know my views have changed and why since i know at least some people are curious.

i am sorry to lose a mutual as well, and i genuinely hope things go well for you, but uh yeah thats that.

again, if people have further questions im willing to answer them i just might take a while bc i have school and other stuff 2 do but uhhh yea sorry if im clogging ur dash sjfjfkkf