#howling commandos of s.h.i.e.l.d.

[haveyoureadthiscomic-poll]

[elgaberino-mcoc]

Man-Thing

Fan-made build by Summoner Biollante442 (Forums)

[holy-shit-comics]

[wwprice1]

Fury 1 by Adam Kubert.

[sonofcoulson]

1948 Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. series 1

Howard finally opens the S.H.I.E.L.D. agency and makes Peggy director. The SSR keep the Playground base and are absorbed into S.H.I.E.L.D. as their research division.

Howard's greater authority and larger amount of resources from the government (as well as his own) allow them to pull in more heroes.

S.H.I.E.L.D. will fight terrorist cells and non-state actors, investigate supernatural phenomena, also deal with and cover up powered people cos the general public "can't handle the truth". This is part of their mandate from the government and S.H.I.E.L.D. is threatened with closure or refusal of funding many times for trying to circumvent this aspect of their role within said government.

Director Carter is trying to maintain a long distance relationship with Sousa and has to investigate the "hit" on Agent Thomson.

Zodiac is the main story for this series.

Zodiac is behind the assassination attempt, with the council of 9 previously being under them. Vernon Masters returns to do their bidding (never saw a body right?). Peggy's brother has been alive all this time and it was his redacted file that Thomson was to smear Peggy with and not actually Peggy's (Michael's name and d.o.b. were redacted just leaving the surname Carter and informants that heavily implied that it was Peggy). With the smear failed, the Zodiac group want it back, for safe keeping. Thomson is the only one outside of the Zodiac or the council of 9 that has read it, so he was supposed to be killed, but they hired Dottie to do it and she was able to make it look like she was trying to kill him without killing him ("if I'd wanted to kill him he'd be dead"). She arranges a meet with Peggy in a subterfugey way, info dumps, insists she really was trying to be helpful by taking the hit job, and manages to wriggle away again.

Zodiac is led by Marcus Lassiter (A buff Milo Ventimiglia with a cool beard). Marcus has the codename Aries and wears ram horns at the meetings which seems silly at first till we realise they are functional and they all have silly costumes. Marcus has super-human strength, which we don't see initially.

All of the Zodiac members have themed powers/tech:

Taurus (Cornelius Van Lunt) has bought his seat on the board and isn't afraid to use that fact. He has a bull's head costume. He also has dangerous horns.

Gemini (Joshua and Damian Link) are identical twins have identical costumes and carry identical dual wielding pistols. They have an amazing synergy when they fight as a duo. They only get one vote between them. 

Cancer (Jack Kleveno) has a crab costume. That is all I have to say about that.

Leo (Daniel Radford) is a dude in a lion suit. It has a lion mask and an exoskeleton that gives the wearer enhanced strength, agility and durability. 

Virgo (Elaine McLaughlin) has an extraterrestrial material coating her suit which gives her great durability and shock absorption. It also allows her to heal/regenerate herself or others. In my head, crab man gets injured by S.H.I.E.L.D. and Elaine comes back and gets captured just to heal her secret crustacean lover.

Libra (Gustav Brandt) has a hi tec blindfold that allows him limited psychic abilities and a teleportation ring. Martial artist too.

Scorpio (Jake Fury) has a costume with venom blasts and neurotoxic sprays. Yes. That Fury. In the comics he is Nick's brother. Here he would have to be his dad. In the series he is only referred to as Jake initially to keep his identity a slight surprise.

Sagittarius (Harlan Vargas) has an eye mask that grants enhanced vision and tracking abilities. He is highly skilled with a bow and arrow.

Capricorn (Willard Weir) is green. I'm thinking they're an alien. This superpower ideas site says Capricorn might have shape shifting abilities so they could be a Skrull masquerading as a Willard Weir.

Aquarius (Michael Carter) has a water based costume and weapons. Michael was not happy with the smear on Peggy but went along with it for fear of repercussions.  But now her life is under threat, so he leaves warnings for her to help her avoid getting killed. Eventually Aries discovers the betrayal and beats Michael to death in his secret apartment. Peggy comes across the apartment as part of the S.H.I.E.L.D. investigation and discovers the body. She realises he was the one giving warnings (to help them avoid traps, ambushes etc) and finds a note he wrote for her when he knew Aries was coming for him. It's written in their shared childhood code. It explains his motivations (he was trying to change the world for the better) and gives some info about what Zodiac are going to do next. Zachary Drebb is the second Aquarius.

Piesces (Noah Perricone) is blue and looks like he'd be good in the water so I'm thinking Talokanil

S.H.I.E.L.D. discover there is an off-books SSR mole on the inside. They are furious with Flynn for not telling them straight away. Flynn thought it would compromise the mole's safety.

As the Zodiac members are arrested or killed during the S.H.I.E.L.D. investigation, Jake Fury is revealed as the SSR mole. He tries to escape with the actual Zodiac key but it corrupts him and he tries to incite rebellion within the remaining Zodiac council members to effect social change. This just causes everyone to squabble and fight. Aries finds this amusing, but comes for Jake nevertheless. Jake ends up losing the key back to Aries, but escapes with his life.

Aries reveals himself as an actual god at the end of the series. He was cast out by Zeus for causing too much trouble in Omnipotence City and bound to be peaceful. He has taken that to mean he can't fight personally and has been manipulating world events with extracts from the aforementioned Zodiac Key to cause as much conflict as possible. The S.H.I.E.L.D. team have been annoying him by thwarting his plans. He says he is tired of being subtle.

They need the whole team, including Dottie, Sousa, Thomson and the Howling commandos using Stark tech and the Human Torch (Jim), Union Jack II (Brian) and Spitfire (Jacqueline). Peggy also calls in a favour from California based Adam Brashear (aka Blue Marvel) to help take him down. As Adam was the love interest from the previous series, this risks embarrassment for Peggy and could possibly end her relationship with Sousa, but the stakes are too high not to.

Ultimately Jim is the only one not affected by the Zodiac key and has to go Supernova to knock him out. He knew he was becoming unstable and had been advised he might go supernova, he just decides to do it on purpose. Heroic sacrifice! The team is devastated at the loss.

A relationship between Jim and Jacqueline would be built up through the series so she would take this the hardest.

Zeus could come and actually bind Ares with power dampening bangles. This physically prevents him from conflict instead of just getting his word. He is captured and will not be seen again till Dark Avengers.

S.H.I.E.L.D. recommends Adam for a commendation and Jim for a posthumous one. The CIA intervene and say that not only will no one will be getting one but no one must hear of it. The existence of gods and aliens is very much covered up at the behest of the American government so as not to cause mass hysteria. No one outside of the President and the people who were at the final battle know anything about it.

Adam is told he cannot be publicly rewarded and is no longer allowed to fight crime (he has been fighting crime in a costume and mask to hide his identity) as the CIA believe the world is not ready for a black superhero. The President reluctantly confirms this. S.H.I.E.L.D. must assign him a handler (he is so going to fight crime).

As Jim was essentially a sentient weapon the CIA won't publicly acknowledge his existence and stipulate he must be buried in the desert in an indestructible airtight box. The President reluctantly confirms this too.

Dottie disappears after making a significant contribution and manages to stay off radar until the first Black Widow movie…

Peggy and Sousa decide to carry on with their long distance relationship.

Namor shows up when he finds out about Noah. He is not happy that his citizen was defeated and arrested and he vows never to return. He is also not happy with said citizen for acting without his consent and forces S.H.I.E.L.D. to release him into Talokanil custody. He is sorry about Jim Hammond's passing though and stays for the burial in a secret S.H.I.E.L.D. location in the desert.

Post credits:- Peggy calls Marlene Frazier and asks, as she has been with Adam this whole time anyway, if she'll be his handler. He comes home and gives her a kiss, they have developed a relationship while working together. She says she is happy to keep an eye on him.

[userpeggycarter]

PEGGY WEEK 2024

day one — 20th century ⏳

@lgbtqcreators creator bingo 💖 overlay.

Margaret Elizabeth "Peggy" Carter began her long life of service as a code-breaker for Bletchley Park during World War II. She was then invited to be an agent for the Special Operations Executive (S.O.E) as one of their first female spies; later she joined the Strategic Scientific Reserve (S.S.R.) and remained there after the war. Carter fought alongside Captain America and his team and was considered an honorary Howling Commando by them, even leading the team after the Captain's "death". With the dissolution of the S.S.R. a few years after the war ended, Carter became a co-founder of the Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement, and Logistics Division (S.H.I.E.L.D.). Eventually, she reached the status of director of said agency, a position she held until her retirement. She died peacefully in her sleep in 2016.

[id in alt]

[swan-of-sunrise]

Let It Out, and Let It In

Summary: Spiraling under the immeasurable weight of his trauma, Steve desperately seeks out the company of his girlfriend and, after experiencing a panic attack in her presence, unexpectedly finds himself opening up to her about his mental health.

Pairing: Steve Rogers X Fem!Reader

Word Count: 5.1k

Warnings/Disclaimers: Disclaimer for a detailed depiction of a panic attack and a frank discussion about Steve Rogers’ trauma

A/N: Hi guys! I've been an MCU/Steve Rogers fan for damn near a decade now, and it hasn't escaped my notice that Steve's trauma has a tendency of being overlooked and overshadowed. So today, we'll be getting a glimpse of his ongoing mental health struggles (I promise you it's not all angst!) Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy!

Let It Out, and Let It In September 2015 The Home of (Y/N) (Y/L/N) and Sam Wilson, Washington D.C. (Superhero Snapshots Masterlist)

“Should’ve called ahead, Rogers,” Steve chastised himself under his breath as he knocked three times on (Y/N)’s front door. He shoved the hood of his sweatshirt off his head and roughly combed his fingers through his hair, the poor attempt to straighten up his appearance for his girlfriend doing very little to distract from his spiraling mental state.

Like many, Steve didn’t exactly have fond memories of high school. While everyone around him seemed to struggle a little as they transitioned from awkward adolescence to mature adulthood, he always felt as though he was one massive step behind them without any hope of catching up. One aspect of high school he did appreciate, though – apart from his friendship with Bucky and his beloved art – were his English courses; he devoured each of the novels, plays and poems that they were assigned to read and thoroughly enjoyed writing themes that analyzed their deeper meanings. One of his favorite books had been The Great Gatsby and even eighty years later, he could still recall the telling exchange that Jay Gatsby shared with Nick Carraway towards the beginning of their friendship: ‘You see, I usually find myself among strangers because I drift here and there trying to forget the sad thing that happened to me.’

The brief line of Gatsby’s dialogue managed to stick with Steve long after he’d finished reading the book, initially because he couldn’t imagine how one’s life could become so lonely but eventually, because he’d come to understand Gatsby’s words all too well; he suffered the loss of his mother and Bucky, went into the ice in 1945 and woke up to find that nearly seventy years had passed him by, grappled with the losses of all his fellow Howling Commandos and helplessly watched as the last personified tie to his past slowly succumbed to dementia. Like Gatsby, Steve preferred the company of strangers; they made it easier for him to ignore the crippling loneliness because they never bothered to try and get to know the traumatized twenty-seven-year-old man behind the red, white and blue shield.

Things began to change for him not long after the Battle of New York. He befriended Natasha, one of his fellow Avengers, and she tried her best to acclimate him to his new life; maybe it was a result of all she’d suffered at the hands of the Red Room or because she was just incredibly adept at reading people, but Nat knew that he was struggling and in her own unique way, she did everything she could to be there for him. He met Sam and (Y/N), leaving his apartment for his usual morning run around the National Mall wearing a serious scowl but departing for his S.H.I.E.L.D. mission afterwards with a truly happy smile on his face; Sam soon became one of his best friends, the VA trauma counselor understanding his difficulties with adjusting to his new life but never treating him differently because of them, and he found himself falling in love with (Y/N), the historical-fiction novelist bursting into his life like sunshine on a cloudy day and making him feel truly seen for who he was instead of the larger-than-life mantle he carried. And with the help of (Y/N), Sam and Nat, he grew closer to his fellow Avengers, even finding himself beginning to view them as his family and accepting the fact that he wasn’t alone anymore.

But while Steve had slowly grown to love and appreciate his new life, there were still some days when the reality of his situation would weigh heavily on his mind and it was only a matter of time before he’d break down into a full-blown panic attack; he did his best to hide his struggles from his girlfriend and friends, not wanting to hurt their feelings or make them feel that they weren’t enough for him, but it was becoming harder and harder for him to pretend that everything was all right. It was one of those awful days that saw Steve impulsively asking Nat to land the Quinjet at Joint Base Andrews on their way home from a mission in Argentina; the assassin did as he asked without question, but he could feel her concerned gaze following him as he walked down the ramp and marched across the airstrip alone. Ignoring the mounting pressure in his chest, he elected to do what he’d often do before the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. and take a walk through the streets of D.C., following in Jay Gatsby’s footsteps and surrounding himself with strangers to avoid addressing the memories of his old life that were clawing their way to the forefront of his mind.

With the hood of his sweatshirt pulled low over his face and his hands shoved into its pockets, Steve trudged down North Capitol Street with his eyes downcast, prolonging his return to his dark and impersonal apartment and the panic attack that would inevitably follow. Dusk had already fallen and downtown, the city’s nightlife was beginning to ramp up; restaurants were packed with families visiting the historic city and cheerful groups of friends pulled one another into the bars and nightclubs, while couples walked arm-in-arm and took in the glimmering lights that illuminated the city’s imposing monuments. It wasn’t until Steve walked past a bookstore and caught sight of (Y/N)’s debut novel, For Queen and Country, proudly displayed in the window that he felt his mind beginning to clear and a small smile tug on his lips. In that instant, Steve was engulfed by an overwhelming need to see his girlfriend and he continued walking down the street at an increased pace, spurred on by the sunshine that might succeed in breaking through the bleak isolation he found himself consumed by.

Steve forced himself out of his musings just as the door swung open to reveal (Y/N); he was pleased to see that she was dressed for a comfortable night in, with a well-loved Lauryn Hill concert t-shirt and a pair of grey sweatpants, but it was evident by the white strip adhered to her nose and the hair towel balanced on her head that he’d interrupted her evening. “Steve!” (Y/N), unaware of the guilt he was experiencing for interrupting her relaxing evening, smiled broadly and opened her door wider. “I’ve really got to stop listening to Sam; that lying Birdbrain told me you guys wouldn’t be back from Argentina until tomorrow.”

“The mission wrapped up a lot quicker than we’d initially anticipated, so Sam’s off the hook fir lying this time,” Steve replied with a small smile as he shoved his fidgeting hands into his pockets. “I, um, I’m really sorry that I didn’t call or text you before coming over, but I was on my way home and I…anyway, I can leave if I’m intruding-”

“Don’t be silly, you’re not intruding!” Standing the side, (Y/N) allowed him to step through the doorway and closed the door before turning to give him a sheepish smile. “After spending all day going over my book’s first draft with Greg, I treated myself to a bubble bath and I may or may not have fallen asleep in the tub; I woke up in lukewarm water and my fingers were all pruney, but it was a damn good nap.”

“You’ve been working hard on your novel, sunshine; if anyone deserves a little rest and relaxation, it’s you.” Steve slipped off his sneakers and neatly placed them near the entryway table, straightening and chuckling when his girlfriend launched herself into his arms and nuzzled her face against his chest. “Did you miss me?”

(Y/N) nodded and tightened her arms around his waist. “I always miss you whenever you’re away on a mission, sweetheart.”

Steve’s heart melted and before he knew it, one of his arms was holding her close while his hand was guiding her face upwards so that his lips could meet hers; their kiss was slow yet passionate, with each of them doing all they could to savor their rare moment of peace, but his initial reason for visiting the historical-fiction novelist made its presence known in his mind and saw him give her one last kiss before pulling away with a forced smile. “Me too, baby. I just…I really needed to see you.”

(Y/N)’s head tilted to the side as her (Y/E/C) eyes studied him but to his surprise and overwhelming gratitude, she didn’t ask him what was wrong or if he was all right. Instead, she took both of his hands in hers and playfully swung their arms while giving him a coy smile. “I was about to try my luck at cooking dinner and since my culinary skills aren’t exactly up to par, I could really use the assistance of a big, strong Avenger. Do you know if any of them are brave enough to accept this dangerous mission?”

“I think I’m up for the challenge, ma’am,” Steve impishly replied and his overstated authoritative tone made (Y/N) giggle as she led him into the kitchen to prepare dinner. “Can I, um, ask what’s on your nose?”

“Oh, it’s for unclogging oil and dead skin cells from pores! It’s a little gross to remove but at the same time, kind of satisfying. Did you want to try one out for yourself?”

“…Sure, why not?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

While helping his girlfriend cook dinner wasn’t quite as dangerous of a task as she’d made it out to be, Steve certainly had his hands full with making sure she didn’t over-season or burn anything in her eagerness to prove her minimal culinary skills; most importantly, however, cooking alongside (Y/N) helped to take his mind off the incapacitating loneliness that drove him to her doorstep in the first place. They sat at the dining room table to enjoy their chicken parmigiana with angel hair pasta and broccoli and (Y/N) even brought out a pricier bottle of red wine to enjoy with their food, a gift she claimed was sent by Tony and Pepper to congratulate her for winning the Goodreads Choice Award for Best Historical Fiction. Steve listened to (Y/N) talk about the last-minute touches being placed on what would soon be her second published novel with rapt attention, voicing his amazement when she revealed which of her favorite authors would be joining her at an upcoming writing convention and chuckling as she told him about the playful argument she’d gotten into with her publisher about certain spelling choices in her draft.

After they finished their meal, they cleaned up the sizable mess they’d made in the kitchen, with Steve washing the dirty dishes and (Y/N) drying and putting them away; they fell into a comfortable silence while they worked, and he found himself focusing on her soft humming as he deliberated over whether or not to open up to her about the complex emotions he was fighting to control. He loved his girlfriend with all his heart, but it was because of his love for her that he hesitated to fully open up and it didn’t take a genius to figure out why: he was not only afraid that he’d hurt her feelings if he told her that he still struggled to acclimate to the twenty-first century, but he was also afraid that the truth would only serve to drive her away. The memory-wiping device from that Will Smith alien movie Tony made me watch could solve all of my problems in the blink of an eye, he sullenly thought with a sideways glance at a blissfully unaware (Y/N) putting away their dishes, you can’t miss something that you don’t have any memories of.

With the kitchen scrubbed clean and the comforting sound of a light rainfall outside echoing throughout the cozy home, Steve and (Y/N) took to the couch to watch some television. The historical-fiction novelist dissolved into a fit of giggles after applying a cleansing strip to Steve’s nose and he happily indulged her by posing for the selfie she all but begged for his permission to take. After she took several pictures and disposed of their cleansing strips, he pulled her into his arms and soundly kissed her, finding that the dark cloud that hung over him was slowly but surely dispersing the longer she kissed him back.

“Do you feel like watching a movie?” (Y/N) breathlessly asked after they’d finally separated for air. A knowing smile was beginning to spread across her face as she realized they’d moved positions during their impromptu make-out session; the historical-fiction novelist was lying flat on her back while he held himself above her and as he deviously grinned down at her, she twirled her fingers around his sweatshirt’s drawstrings and shrugged offhandedly. “Not that I have any problem with continuing our current activities, of course-”

“Neither do I.”

His girlfriend’s smirk widened at his hasty reply. “But TCM’s been airing a really good screwball comedy marathon all day, and I was thinking that we could give it a watch. I guarantee that my world-famous Milk Duds-and-popcorn concoction pairs excellently with a glass of top shelf red wine and 1935’s Top Hat, so how ‘bout it?”

Steve’s smile instantly dropped at her otherwise innocuous statement. His lungs began to restrict, his vision blurred and it was as though someone had suddenly flipped a switch inside of his hippocampus; all at once, jarring flashes of cloudy memories flooded his mind and overtook his vision.

Bucky dragging Steve along on another double date and insisting that this one would be different than the other failed dates he’d arranged…his throat constricting as his date scowled at the sight of him…sitting in a darkened theater beside the highly displeased woman and throwing his best friend an envious look as he smoothly draped an arm over his smitten date’s shoulders…trying his damndest to enjoy the hit Astaire & Rogers musical-comedy so that his night wouldn’t be so miserable…

“Sweetheart? Are you okay?”

Fists tightening in anger when he saw a furious-looking man dragging his date up the aisle while she begged him to calm down…staggering to his feet in the alleyway behind the theater and throwing another punch at the laughing man, only for him to easily dodge and shove him against the nearby dumpster…fighting to catch his breath as he crumpled to the grimy ground and panicking when he recognized the tell-tale signs of an oncoming asthma attack…frantically grabbing at his pockets in search of his asthma cigarettes, fully conscious of Bucky’s shouting and his date’s frightened scream but unable to stop the black dots from invading his vision…

“You’re having a panic attack, Steve, so I need you to take a deep breath. Can you do that for me? C’mon, sweetheart, just breathe.”

Bucky’s hand colliding with his bruised cheek and stunning him back to consciousness long enough for his best friend to practically shove a lit asthma cigarette between his lips…inhaling the smoke and clutching his ribs as his body was wracked with a violent coughing fit…calling out for his mother the moment he regained his breath, only to break down into heaving sobs when he remembered that she’d been gone for nearly six months…

“Steve, look at me.” The sudden feel of his fingers pressed against a soft warmth finally forced Steve’s eyes open; although he was crouched in the corner of his girlfriend’s living room instead of a dingy alleyway behind Bay Ridge’s Alpine Cinema, his chest was still heaving under the strain of regaining his breath and his entire body was trembling. He focused on the blurry figure and realized in a flash of fear that it was (Y/N) kneeling on the floor before him, looking calm and composed as she held his hand against the side of her neck and gently spoke to him. “Take a deep breath in through your nose and out through your mouth, like this.” The historical-fiction novelist completed the breathing exercise and nodded in approval when he shakily copied her. “That’s it, you’re doing so well, sweetheart. What are three things you can see?”

“You,” Steve automatically replied, making his girlfriend smile as his eyes darted around in search of two more items. “Sam’s bowl of wine corks…the lamp that you found at that estate sale a couple of weeks ago.”

“Good, good, but don’t forget to keep on breathing. What’re three things you can hear?”

He took another deep breath and released it before answering. “The rain falling on the rooftop above us…the refrigerator’s ice-maker refilling itself…the ticking of the clock in the entryway.”

(Y/N)’s eyes searched his and he spotted the flicker of trepidation that briefly flashed across them while she studied his features. “You’re doing such a good job, sweetheart. Now, can you touch three things for me and tell me what you feel?”

“Y-Yeah…” Steve swallowed thickly, his stiff fingers slowly flexing against the skin of his girlfriend’s neck as he focused on all he could feel. “Your pulse. It’s strong and steady. I can feel the warmth of the blood flowing through your veins.” Emboldened by her encouraging nod, he brought his other hand up to rest flat against his chest and stretched out his fingers along the material of his sweatshirt. “My sweatshirt’s soft, and my fingers catch on its embroidered logo…” He lowered his hand to touch the living room’s hardwood floor and winced at the unpleasant sensation. “The floor’s cold. All I can think about is the moment I crashed the Valkyrie into the ice.”

The historical-fiction novelist raised her arms but suddenly halted her movements. “Are you up for a hug right now?” Instead of answering, Steve wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into a tight embrace; he buried his face in her neck and squeezed his eyes shut as her arms draped around his shoulders, savoring the weight of her warm body pressed against his and practically preening when her fingers rhythmically carded through his hair. “You can talk to me, Steve. Whatever it is you have to get off your chest, I’ll listen.” He could feel her press a kiss onto his hair. “And if you want to just sit here and enjoy the silence, then I’ll be more than happy to oblige you. I…I don’t want you to be afraid of letting me in; you deserve to feel safe enough to express yourself, sweetheart, no matter what.”

Steve didn’t know how long they sat there in silence before he rested his chin on her shoulder and stared unseeingly at her cozy living room as he finally found his voice. “The first thing that people told me after coming out of the ice was how lucky I was. They told me that surviving the crash and the ice was a blessing in disguise and that I’d have a shot at living a better life – and they were all so damn pleased with themselves as they were saying it, too, like they could claim that they did their one good deed for the day by convincing Captain America that he was better off in the 21st century – and none of ‘em could understand why I wasn’t as happy as the rest of the world was. Fury arranged for me to see a therapist, but I stopped going after the first appointment because I could see that it’d be more of the same ‘be grateful for what you’ve been given’ shit; there was no one I felt that I could talk to, and then after Loki and the Battle of New York happened…well, most everyone stopped trying to get to know me after that. The lack of any genuine companionship meant it was easier for me to hide and even numb my feelings, but when I found myself bonding with you and Nat and Sam, I…I started to become afraid of driving you all away.”

Steve pulled back far enough to meet (Y/N)’s eyes, only realizing he’d started to cry when her hands delicately cradled his face and her thumbs brushed his drying tear tracks away. “Were you afraid of how we’d react if you admitted that you still think about your old life?” There was no hint of judgement in her expression or hostility in her eyes, only patience and consideration, and Steve found himself silently appreciating his girlfriend’s kindhearted nature as he nodded. “Sweetheart, I want you to listen to me very carefully: depriving yourself of emotions is to deprive yourself of humanity. You’re human, Steve, and you’re allowed to feel however you feel. The people who love you love you for who you are and while I can’t speak for Sam or Nat, I want you to know that I’ll never, ever ask you to repress your emotions for my sake.”

“(Y/N)…” Steve softly started as one of his hands moved to caress her cheek. “No matter what, I’m always gonna have these memories of my life without you in my head. I have no way of knowing when or even if I’ll be settled into my new life. Doesn’t that…doesn’t that bother you?”

His girlfriend smiled patiently and shook her head before countering his question with one of her own. “If our roles were reversed and I was the one who’d come out of the ice instead, would you still love and accept me for who I am?”

“Of course I would, sunshine,” Steve replied with conviction.

“Then believe me when I say that I’ll always love and accept you, sweetheart, no matter what.” With tears beginning to well in her own eyes, (Y/N) leaned forward and pressed a kiss onto his forehead. “Please, please believe me.”

Steve’s heart nearly broke at the desperation that laced her plea and he hurriedly nodded. “I believe you, baby.” He gently coaxed her to look up and into his eyes; the unabashed love that he saw emanating from her tear-filled eyes melted something deep within him, encouraging him to rest his forehead against hers and brush the pad of his thumb along her flushed cheek. “I believe you.” They stayed there for an undetermined amount of time, with their arms wrapped around one another and their eyes closed while they relished the warmth of one another’s embrace and listened to the steady patter of rain outside. When Steve felt his heartbeat slow to its usual pace and his limbs stop their trembling, he trailed his hand down from his girlfriend’s cheek to rest against her chest, in the space directly over her heart; he wasn’t sure why, but the steady beating of her heart against his palm was soothing to him. “Thank you for helping me through all of that; if I’d gone through it alone, I’d still be spiraling right about now.”

“If you don’t mind my asking, about how often do you go through a panic attack?”

Opening his eyes, Steve considered her question for several moments as he took in the consideration that was written across her face. “A couple of times a month,” He replied with a wistful smile. “They started right after I came out of the ice, but they’ve been happening a little more frequently lately.”

(Y/N) offered him a sympathetic smile. “You know, I may not be a Certified Kick-Ass Counselor like Sam is but if I learned anything from working with him down at the VA, it’s that acknowledging your feelings can be a great first step towards healing.” He hummed thoughtfully and took in her words as her fingers smoothed down his rumpled hair. “When you start to feel another panic attack coming on, you can always give me a call and I’ll do whatever I can to help you through it, okay? You don’t have to go through this alone.”

“I’m not sure how it’ll live up to this…” Steve’s arms wound back around the historical-fiction novelist’s waist and pulled her in close with a content smile on his face. “But I promise you I will.” The familiar jingle of their local ten o’clock news sounded throughout the living room, causing him to give his girlfriend an apologetic look. “I’m sorry, we’re probably missing that screwball comedy marathon you wanted to watch, aren’t we?”

“It’s okay, I’ll just head down to Barnes & Noble one of these days and buy the Blu-Rays. Besides, I think that now’s the perfect time to introduce you to one of favorite comfort movies, but only if you’re up for it.”

Steve, touched by the consideration she was continuously showing for him and his mental health, swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat and pressed a chaste kiss onto her lips, pulling back after a moment with a playful grin. “I’m up for anything, so long as it’s with my best girl…and her world-famous Milk Duds-and-popcorn concoction, of course.”

“Oh, of course,” (Y/N) readily agreed as she fought the smirk of amusement that was threatening to spread across her face; after extricating herself from his embrace, she hopped to her feet and offered him her hand, lacing her fingers around his once he stood and leading him into the kitchen as she continued. “We’ll make my not-so-secret recipe, pop open another bottle of pricey wine, and then we’ll be all set to watch 1978’s Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band!”

“That’s the Beatles, right? So, does that mean the movie’s about the album?”

“…You’ll see.”

Needless to say, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band was one of the strangest movies Steve had ever seen, but it was also one of the most entertaining movie-watching experiences he’d ever had; he chuckled at all of the corny yet earnest moments, watched in admiration as his girlfriend sang along to each and every one of the Beatles songs that played and even caught himself tearing up at the few emotional moments, all while indulging in some delicious popcorn and wine. Steve’s arms were holding (Y/N) close while they lounged across the couch and it was then, as the historical-fiction novelist in his arms sang her heart out to the film’s absurd yet catchy version of ‘Get Back,’ that he realized he felt more grounded in reality than he’d felt in a long, long time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three days later, Steve was returning to his room in the Avengers Facility after a long intelligence briefing with the rest of the team when he spotted a box sitting in front of his suite’s locked door. I don’t remember ordering anything online, he thought to himself as he cautiously picked up the box and brought it inside; their mail was regularly scanned and checked for explosives and biological weapons upon arrival and while Steve was fond of bidding on used vinyl records on Ebay, he hadn’t logged into his account since well before his mission in Argentina.

“Please don’t be another ‘Over The Hill’ shirt from Tony,” He sighed under his breath, setting the package down onto his bed and retrieving his pocket knife from his dresser drawer.

Steve carefully sliced through the packing tape and pushed open the cardboard flaps, his head tilting to the side when his eyes landed on a misshapen bundle of bubble wrap inside. His interest piqued, he unfurled the piece of bubble wrap and his brows rose in surprise when a large stuffed black and white cow tumbled out onto his comforter; a small card was attached to the sky-blue bow around the stuffed animal’s neck, and he wasted no time in detaching it and reading its brief contents.

Sweetheart,

Meet Buttercup the Cow! I did a little research and found out that weighted stuffed animals can help reduce feelings of anxiety and even ground someone who’s experiencing a panic attack; whenever you begin to feel yourself spiraling or getting lost in your memories, hold Buttercup and imagine that I’m right there with you, giving you the biggest hug imaginable.

With all my love,

Your Sunshine

Steve’s eyes prickled with unshed tears as he placed the heartfelt note down on his dresser, right beside the framed sketch he’d drawn of his beautiful girlfriend long before they began to date. He picked up the stuffed cow and tested its weight in his hands before hugging it tight to his chest; he could already feel his shoulders relaxing and when he nuzzled his cheek against the soft fabric, he realized that the clever historical-fiction novelist had sprayed some of her perfume – Design by Paul Sebastian – onto the stuffed cow. Breathing in the familiar notes of tuberose and jasmine, Steve briefly closed his eyes as he smiled to himself and thought about how much he loved his girlfriend and her kind heart.

A brilliant idea suddenly came to Steve’s mind and after setting Buttercup down on his pillow, he pulled a jacket on, tucked his wallet into his back pocket and scooped up his motorcycle’s keys, hurrying out of his suite and down the hall to the common room; Sam was in the middle of making a sandwich while Wanda and Vision sat together on the sofa debating their favorite sitcoms, the counselor looking up from his half-made meal and flashing him a welcoming smile. “Hey, man, we’re gonna do a little team bonding and watch Modern Family while we eat lunch; you want a sandwich or a wrap?”

“Thanks for the offer, Sam, but I’ve gotta go run an errand,” Steve replied with an apologetic look and twirled his keys around his finger. “Do you happen to know where the nearest Barnes & Noble is?”

“Um, I think there’s one up in Kingston…?”

“1200 Ulster Avenue.” They both looked over at their android teammate as he nonchalantly continued. “According to all available data, the store sees low to moderate business around this time, and the traffic appears to be light.”

An impressed Steve gave him an appreciative nod. “Thanks, Vis.”

Their exchange caught Wanda’s attention, causing her to look up from her box set of DVD’s and arch a curious brow. “You usually detest going out on errands. Is everything all right?”

“Yep, I’ve just got some Blu-Rays I need to buy.” He flashed his befuddled teammates a grin as he brusquely headed out of the common room. “I’ll see you guys later!”

As he jogged down the steps and crossed their private parking lot towards his motorcycle, the cell phone in his pocket chimed; he swung his leg over and sat as he pulled his phone out to check his text messages, chuckling to himself after reading his friend’s brief message.

Sam: If you show up at Booksmart’s doorstep with a box set of old Cary Grant flicks, she just might ask you to marry her on the spot 😂

Glancing up towards the floor-to-ceiling window in the common room and spotting an amused Sam watching him, Steve grinned and gave the counselor a teasing salute before revving up the engine and taking off. I can’t think of a better outcome than that, he thought to himself as he sped down the road, a truly happy smile spreading across her face at the mental image of someday marrying the love of his life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: And there we have it! I promise, the next one-shot will be a little happier and although I haven't decided which movie/show I wanna tackle next, I'm sure that little series will be happier too! Thank you all so much for reading and commenting! I’ve created a Spotify playlist inspired by this series, and I’ll be updating it every time I upload a new chapter. Enjoy!

Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3ziGMhEsAw833GQ9eV44nR?si=6dfead09c76848d5 

Stumblin’ In Book VII: “Superhero Snapshots” Masterlist 

Stumblin’ In Book II: “Age of Ultron” Masterlist

Tagging:  @mrs-obrien​​​​​ @lahoete​​​​​ @awkward117 @cminr @natdrunk​​​​ @momc95​​​​​ @savedbystyle​​​​​ @miraculouscloud @awkwardnesshabitat​​​​​ @marinettepotterandplagg​​​​​ @mangosandmimosas @supersouthy @benakenalove​​​​​ @brooke0297​​​​​ @hufflepeople​​​​​ @becausewelie​​​​​ @outoftheregular​​​​​​ @junipermurdock​​​​​ @ladydmalfoy @mads-weasley​​​​​ @username23345@crist1216​​​​​ @capswife​​​​​ @lilmschild​​​​​ @avngrsinitiative @crowleysqueenofhell​​​​​ @y-napotat​​​ @mary1raven​​​​​ ​​​​​@groovy-lady @ljej95 @innersublimefury @prettysbliss

[it-was-too-cold-always]

Always Read the Fine Print Chapter 1

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Who actually reads all the terms and conditions? After mindlessly checking a box years ago, our Reader unintentionally agrees to be part of a scientific study to create super soldier babies. To make matters worse, her fellow test subject is the brooding and intimidating Bucky Barnes.

Warnings: arranged marriage, eventual smut, lots of angst

A genetic test for antidepressants. That's what got you into this mess. When the paperwork asked if you wanted to use your data to "contribute to future studies," you thought sure, whatever I can do to help. Little did you realize that those studies had absolutely nothing to do with antidepressants. What you also didn't realize is that little box you checked was legally binding.

It was a completely boring Wednesday when you received a fancy letter with the S.H.I.E.L.D. logo inviting you to participate in "a scientific study that could change the future." Get some bloodwork done, maybe answer a few questionnaires, what more could they need from you? In hindsight, you should've questioned why they'd need you to fly you out just for that. But the fact that the study was from S.H.I.E.L.D. made you giddy - yes, you were a major Captain America fan. In fact, growing up you've done several school projects on Captain America and the Howling Commandos. You always thought his right hand man, James Buchanan Barnes, was the most handsome of the group, and of course your friends gave you plenty of shit for having a crush on a guy from the 1940s. So yes, you were very much excited to go.

Once your plane landed, you were taken right to S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters. Damn, this study really must be a big deal. You were escorted to a small room with no windows. There was a round table with four chairs, a very fake-looking plant, and some nondescript art hanging on the walls. For being such an impressive building, this room was mediocre at best. You sat in a chair facing the door, anxiously wringing your hands and trying to dispel nervous energy. Right as you let your mind start to wander, a man in a suit walked through the door and greeted you. He held a locked briefcase that he set gently on the table. Sitting across from you, he opened the briefcase and pulled out a folder stuffed with papers. His nonchalant attitude calmed you down. Just some boring paperwork, you thought, nothing crazy. The first packet he pulled out looked familiar - it was the paperwork from the genetic testing you did years ago. You saw your signature at the bottom of the page. Then he pulled out other packets of paper and set a pen in front of you. You were trying to gather what it might be by the questions he was asking, but you were still clueless. Do you have a history of seizures? Are you or could you be pregnant? Do you have asthma? High blood pressure? Those are so generic it could be anything. He started flipping through the pages and pointing to where you needed to sign. Did you ask why? Nope. Did you question it at any moment? Absolutely not. You signed all over those documents and never considered that it wouldn't be in your best interest. Once you were done, you were escorted into an exam room. This is what you were expecting. They did a physical and some lab work and asked even more questions. They told you to get dressed and a car will take you to your hotel room. They'd give me a call tomorrow when the results come in, and we'll go from there. Easy enough, I can spend the rest of the day to myself. The anxiety of what tomorrow could bring was eating you up, but you willed yourself to go to a local restaurant and walk around. This was partially a vacation, after all.

The next morning, you got up early. You contemplated sleeping in, putting your phone on loud so you don't miss their call, but your nerves got the best of you. You showered, got dressed, put on some makeup, and headed down to the lobby for complementary breakfast. By the time you were done eating, it was 9 AM. Still no call. Give them time, you thought. You headed back up to your room and decided to read your book. Lame, you're in a new city and reading in a hotel room, but what if they called? You had to be ready. Just as you were really getting into your book, your phone rang. You jumped from the sudden noise in your quiet room. Quickly calming yourself, you answered the phone. The results were in, and a car would be at your hotel in 15 minutes. Finally, the wait was over.

Unlike the last time, you were escorted to a room with giant windows overlooking the city. You once again sat across the table to face the door, mentally preparing yourself for whatever came next. Nothing exciting, it's literally going to be more paperwork, you told yourself. Stop hyping yourself up over nothing. Once again, a man in a suit walked through the door. This one seemed just as indifferent as the last one.

"The results came back, and we're quite impressed. You're the perfect candidate for our study. In fact, you're the only one in this group of recruits that match our criteria. You've been cleared to move forward," the man said.

That's good, right? You inquired about the next steps, which again seemed vague. You were told that you'd get to meet your fellow candidate and get acquainted, and the experiment can begin shortly after. But then he started saying things that made you realize you made a horrible mistake: "potential for a viable pregnancy" and "genetics that could withstand the serum" were the only two you heard, after that you couldn't pay attention. What the fuck. What the actual fuck.

Your spiraling thoughts were interrupted by two men walking through the door. They helped you out of your chair and lead you down the hall to a room that already had people inside. You were too dazed to actually look at who was in the room, you just sat down in the chair that was pulled out for you. At one point you realized someone had asked you a question.

"Sorry, what?"

"Have you been briefed about your duties in this study?' It was a tight-lipped woman standing at the head of the table.

"I think so," was the only response your little brain could spit out.

"Perfect, I believe Barnes has some stipulations regarding details of this experiment. Shall we discuss them?"

You snapped out of your daze and looked at the people sitting across from you. Holy shit. Bucky Barnes was staring right at you.

Chapter 2

[keepxsolxinxsolxinvictus]

S.H.I.E.L.D. File

Classified, Level 7 access

Barnes, James Buchanan

DOB: 5/10/1917

Sergeant, U. S. ARMY enlisted 1941

Last Deployment 1943. 107th Infantry Regiment to European theater

Declared POW: October 1943, Azzano, Italy, held at Hydra Base Camp C3

Liberated: November 1943

Assignment: Elite Squad, "Howling Commandos" formed 1944, designated sniper

Declared MIA, designated KIA: 5/1945, Approximate location, Danube River. Last confirmed sighting Schnellzug EB912 locomotive HYDRA Transport, elevated tracks. Body not recovered.

Last Known Location: Siberia

Affiliation: USSR, Hydra

Suspected "Winter Soldier"

Years of Operation: Unverified. Current information not compatible with normal human lifespan. Facts and factors under investigation. Confirmed Cryogenic Preservation Program. Suspected unknown serum. Rumored cyborg.

Wikipedia

Fandom.com

MCU Wiki

[mrsbuckybarnes1917]

FINDING YOU: One Year Later

Summary: You're in a relationship with Steve Rogers, but his best friend just always seems to be around!

Word Count: 4.7k

Warnings: This came out longer than I thought!

MASTERLIST

One Year Later

Lines of worry creased the skin on your temples. Getting a call from the police about your boyfriend was never a good sign. It seemed a little odd to you that they had requested your presence in Kissena Park in Queens. Your hands squeezed the steering wheel repeatedly as you waited for the lights to change, you were only two blocks away from the location coordinates you’d been sent.

Fucking finally! you thought as you shifted the gear to park and hopped out with your phone.

It didn’t take long for you to catch sight of a patrol car with the door of the backseat open and a sullen Bucky sitting behind the partition. The officers appeared to be rather relaxed and you contemplated your approach. There wasn’t any need to introduce yourself, one of the officers spotted your arrival.

"You the S.O.?"

"Yeah. What's going on?"

"He's been lurking around the park. A family complained that they found it creepy. Now we know Sergeant Barnes is an Avenger and we wanted to confirm that he is acting under the orders of the correct authorities. He said you were his S.O.. Can we see your credentials?"

You wanted to slap yourself across the forehead. They clearly meant superior officer, not significant other. It was a good thing you carried your S.H.I.E.L.D. identification with you everywhere, even though you technically weren't an active agent any more.

"Ma'am, we're happy to release Sergeant Barnes to you. I hope we don't receive any further complaints."

"No problem officer. Thank you for the call, it's most appreciated.” You jerked your head at Bucky, trying to look authoritative. "Let's go."

He followed you back to your car sullenly, getting into the passenger seat. He looked at the floor, almost looking like a child who was waiting to be scolded for his behavior.

"You OK?" you asked.

"Yeah," he grunted, offering nothing by way of explanation to his actions.

"You going to tell what happened back there?"

If there was one thing Bucky was good at, it was the vacant stare.

“Look Buck, you know I don't want to force you to do anything but I just had to use my ID to get you out of trouble. Just because you're not on parole anymore, doesn't mean they won't use any excuse to throw you under the bus. Don't you think I deserve some kind of explanation?”

This time Bucky looked up at you, anguish clearly etched across his face.

You sighed, taking his hand and leaning back on your seat. After a few moments of silence, you reached out to start the car. Just as you were about to press the ignition, Bucky spoke.

"They're my family."

Whatever you expected from him, this was not it.

"What?" you asked in disbelief.

“They're my sister's kids… and grandkids. I thought-” he paused, struggling to find the right words. “I thought it might help me… to remember things about who I was before… before all this. My sister, she always used to make me laugh when I was down. I thought if I had something of hers, a photograph even, it would be-

“They kept all the Howling Commando uniforms, all those recordings of our tactical briefings, and so many other things at the Smithsonian. But they said all personal artifacts were returned to family members.

“Anyway, turns out, she grew up, got married and had kids. And their kids had their own kids. She's gone now, my sister. I don't know what I'd expected.”

You squeezed his hand in sympathy. “Why didn't you go over and talk to them?”

“And say what? Hi, I'm your Uncle Bucky, I've been a brainwashed assassin for the last 70 years but I'm back now. Let's have dinner together?”

“Well I probably wouldn't have quite put it like that, but that would be the basic gist.”

“Do you think they'd even want me around, near their children?”

“Sam doesn't seem to have any problem with you hanging out with his nephews.”

“Sam knows me.”

“I mean, there is an easy solution to the problem. You could let them get to know you? I get it, Buck. It's scary. But I'd give anything to be able to have my sisters back."

You rarely spoke to anyone about your past before S.H.I.E.L.D. Not many people knew that your older sisters had been killed by HYDRA. It was the reason you'd joined the agency in the first place.

“I know.” He squeezed your hand gently.

“Whatever you want to do, I'm here for you.”

“Can I say something stupid?”

“Wow, might be the first time you’ve asked permission, normally do just go ahead and do it.”

Bucky deigned your response with a side eye and the tiniest of smiles.

“What if they don’t want me?”

“Then they don’t deserve you.”

Bucky sat in a contemplative silence, mulling over your words. After a few minutes, you started to feel a bit restless, wondering how long you were expected to sit in your car watching him think. It wasn’t that you minded significantly, but you’d been about to eat when the cops had called and your stomach felt like it had started digesting itself.

Just as you were about to say something, he spoke.

“Will you do it?” he asked.

“Do what?”

“Tell them.”

“Are you sure?”

“Well last time they called the police because they saw me. I’m not sure how they will take it if I just walk up to them.”

“Fair point.”

“You should probably go, they usually leave around now.”

“Bucky!”

“Please?” 

His voice was soft, his eyes pleading. He didn’t ask you for much in your relationship, always happy to do the things you enjoyed because he was happiest seeing your face filled with joy. How could you refuse? It’s not that you wanted to refuse, you’d go to the moon if Bucky asked you, but you were afraid of how things would turn out for the man you loved.

“Alright, alright. I’m going.”

You hopped out of the car and made your way over to the large group that Bucky had pointed out to you.

"Excuse me? Hi!" you called out. Why did you sound so strange? How did you still find these social situations intimidating? You were an agent, a doctor and a teacher, why was it so hard to start a social conversation with a stranger?

"Hello!" A short brunette with blue eyes responded to you. "Can I help you?"

You introduced yourself. "I'm here on behalf of… my-" you sighed. Why was this so difficult? Time to change tact. "I'm a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. I believe you're descendants of George and Winifred Barnes. Is that correct?"

"Yeah. Why are you looking for us?" An older man piped up, coming closer to you. "What do you want?"

"Uncle Scott! You don't have to be rude!"

"Becca, you can't trust these people."

"I'm actually here about a member of your family." You looked directly at Scott. "Your mother's brother."

"My mother's brother? You mean my uncle? Uncle Bucky? Mom told us about him. He's dead. He was a World War 2 hero."

"Yes! Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, 107th Infantry Regiment. He still is a hero.”

“You sound like you’re in love with a dead guy,” Becca snarked at you.

“Actually he isn’t dead. That’s why I’m here. He wants to meet you.”

“What?” Becca’s gasp was incredulous. “He would be well over a hundred years old!”

“One hundred and six to be exact!”

“So a dying man wants to meet his family? What has he been doing all this time? All these years nothing, and now suddenly on his deathbed he wants a family reunion?.”

“Becs,” Her uncle put a hand on her shoulder. It was nice to see the closeness of their relationship.

“Yeah about that. He isn’t dying. During the war, HYDRA… the Nazis took him prisoner. Everyone thought he was dead. They brainwashed him, kept him in cryostasis and only unfroze him to commit some horrific crimes. You may have read about him in the news a few years ago, the Winter Soldier? He isn't the man you have heard about. He is a veteran with some pretty severe PTSD. But he is a wonderful man, who wants to know his family. The question I have for you is; will you have him?”

“So it’s true? Uncle Bucky is the Winter Soldier?” Scott asked.

“He was. He isn’t anymore,” you reassured him.

“What does he want from us?” Becca looked at you with an element of suspicion.

“He wants to know his family. Almost everyone he knew died when he was taken prisoner."

"Why now?" Kimberly joined the conversation. "Hi, I'm Kim. This is my daughter Rebecca."

"You named her after your mom," you smiled.

Kim nodded. "She used to tell us stories about her big brother when we were kids. Usually when she wanted us to get along."

You laughed, Kimberly seemed a bit more relaxed and accepting of the situation.

"I think it might be a good idea for you to discuss this amongst yourselves before making a decision. Maybe you could call me or text me your decision?" You held out your card to Kimberly, but it was intercepted by Becca.

"Thanks, we'll get back to you."

You nodded. "Thank you for your time."

As you walked back to your car, you knew Bucky's sharp eyes followed every step. You tried to keep your expression neutral but you knew it wouldn't allay any of his anxiety.

"What happened?" The words left his lips before you'd even sat down.

"They said that they wanted to discuss it as a family and that they would let me know."

"So basically it's a 'no'."

"Bucky, that's not a 'no'. That's literally 'I'll think about it'."

"Which whenever my parents said it meant 'no'."

"Wow, parents haven't changed over the last hundred years," you muttered under your breath.

"I should have known this would happen." Bucky turned his head away and stared sullenly out of the window.

Becca had texted you after five agonizing days of you having to deal with an impatient and withdrawn Bucky. He had stopped sleeping again even though he denied that the nightmares had reared their ugly head, you knew it was eating away at him. One night you had woken up to find your bed empty and you’d eventually located Bucky lying on the floor on the living room rug staring at the ceiling. He had hustled you back to the bedroom, following you only because he knew you’d join him on the floor if he hadn’t insisted.

His grandniece’s text had been brief. A time, date and her address along with a brief comment that she would meet you and Bucky before either of you could see the family again.

On the day, you could tell he was trying his hardest to make a good impression. He had put on your favorite henley and a pair of dark blue jeans which you hadn’t seen before.

“When did you get those?” you asked as you shimmied into a pair of your most comfortable pants.

“I’ve always had these.” He turned away to hide his embarrassment, not wanting you to tease him for having gone out to buy something that wasn’t black. Sam had once pointed out that he was giving off vampire vibes with his wardrobe.

“You look very handsome,” you gave him a proud smile and quick peck on the cheek.

Bucky looked at himself in the full length mirror you’d made him install on the bedroom wall. You noticed how he tugged at his left sleeve, conscious of how much of his vibranium arm was on display. Bucky rarely wore short sleeves in the company of strangers and out in public to avoid looks of curiosity or disgust. That wasn’t the case when you were alone together, or with your friends, opting to wear t-shirts and sleeping topless.

You took his metal hand to stop his fidgeting. “You’ll be fine.”

“How do you know?”

“I think you’ll find the two of you have a lot in common.”

“Oh you think she can relate to being a brainwashed assassin?”

“Sarcasm, check.”

Bucky rolled his eyes at you.

“Eye-rolling, check.”

“Okay, okay. Shall we go?”

“Already?” you moaned before muttering under your breath. “And I thought I had a problem with arriving too early to places.”

“Come on,” he urged you to finish getting ready.

He let you drive which was a sure sign of his nerves. Bucky spent the whole drive nervously shaking his leg and staring vacantly out of the window. You hated seeing that look on his face, like his soul had somehow left his body and lost its way. Your deepest fear was that one day you’d lose him altogether. There was little time for you to dwell on that thought as you parked up outside Becca’s townhouse. The plan had been to sit in the car until the appropriate time before announcing yourselves, but your phone vibrated with a text from Becca telling you to come inside.

“Nice to see you again.” You held out your hand for Becca to shake.

Becca returned the formality, her eyes focused on the man standing close behind you. “Please, come in.” She turned and marched into the house before you’d had a chance to introduce Bucky.

You started to follow but Bucky held you back, looking unsure about Becca’s brusqueness.

“It’ll be alright, Buck. Come on,” you beckoned him to follow you.

Becca’s home was well lived. Family photographs littered the walls and you picked your way through a minefield of toys that were scattered across the floor. The décor seemed to be a mismatch of furniture from the late 60s and early 70s. The two of you followed her into the kitchen where she put the kitchen counter between herself and you.

“This place is really cozy, Becca.” You made an attempt to break the ice.

“It’s awful, don’t sugar coat it. The wallpaper is possibly the ugliest thing about this place. But for some reason I can’t bring myself to change it. What do you think?” Her question was directed at Bucky.

Bucky took a moment to think about his response. “It’s all very… loud.”

Becca laughed. “That’s exactly what Grandma used to say. She hated it. This used to be her house. Grandpa bought the wallpaper without telling her and she never had the heart to tell him to change it.” Becca’s explanation was all aimed at Bucky. “So you’re Uncle Bucky.”

“Yeah,” Bucky answered gruffly. “Your parents named you after her?”

“What gave it away?”

You sniggered. Her attitude was very similar to Bucky’s, every other comment dripping with snark or sarcasm.

“So why are you here?” Her question was abrupt and to the point.

It caught Bucky off guard slightly. You took his hand and nodded your encouragement. “Go on, it’s okay,”

“When I joined the army, I was a kid. Younger than you are now. I was going to war to be a hero for my country. I thought it was the greatest adventure of my life. Then my best friend showed up and for a while it was incredible. Then… I fell from a moving train, into a ravine and my life just stopped. They-” Bucky fell silent for a few moments, trying to find the words to continue his story. It was your supportive hand on his back that brought him back from the past threatening to overwhelm him. “They used me to do… horrible things. They… took my mind, I didn’t know who I was for years. Just their soldier. Steve saved me, but I… I just want to go home.”

You blinked the tears away from your eyes. Even though you instinctively knew what Bucky wanted, hearing him say the words out loud was heartbreaking. He squeezed your hand to let you know he was still with you.

Neither of you were sure what Becca’s thoughts had been when she had agreed to the meeting, but she seemed to have been rendered speechless.

You could tell her silence was making Bucky nervous, so you decided to break some of the tension. “Becca, you think I could put on some coffee?”

“Umm, yeah sure.”

You bustled around the unfamiliar kitchen, trying to locate everything you needed. It was obvious that Becca needed some time to process her thoughts, but it was just as clear that the silence was eating Bucky alive. It was only after you’d poured out three mugs of coffee that you felt it was time to push things.

“Hey Becca, how are you doing?”

“Sorry, I was just thinking.” She shook her head as if to clear the cobwebs from her thoughts. “Hang on, I have an idea.” Without further explanation, she disappeared from the kitchen.

“Give her a moment, Buck. It’s a lot to process.”

“Yeah.” He took a sip of coffee mostly because it was something to do. Doing meant that he wasn’t thinking. Thinking only led to pain.

Surprisingly Becca was back in a few moments. “Come.” One word was all she gave before disappearing into the living room. Bucky looked at you and you looked back at him before you followed. The room was even more cluttered than the hallway from an array of old fashioned furniture, to kids toys to a plasma screen television and play station. Becca patted the seat beside on the couch, inviting Bucky to sit beside her.

You carefully placed the three coffee mugs on the table and squeezed onto the end of the couch beside your boyfriend. Becca placed an old cloth bound book in Bucky’s lap.

"I thought you'd like to see this."

Bucky looked at his great niece quizzically but she said nothing, just motioned for him to open the book. He complied with her request, flipping open the cover. There was a large black and white photograph of a very happy looking woman in her wedding dress beside her clearly besotted brand new husband.

"Grandma always said that she put this in here first because it was the start of her new life, she felt like she was living again."

Bucky traced his fingers over the photograph, desperately reaching back into the past for a glimpse of what he had lost. Becca reached across his lap and turned the page. There on the next page were a few images which made Bucky gasp quietly. The first was a faded photo of George and Winifred Barnes. Under it were a couple of tatty and frayed photos which had been lovingly placed under the plastic film. Bucky’s eyes focused on the one of himself as a ten year old boy with his little sister sitting on his shoulders.

"She was still a kid when I-" Bucky's voice was thick with emotion. "It's so strange seeing her all grown up. I missed everything."

"Not everything. We're still here. If you're serious about this, why don't you come-" Becca stopped mid sentence as a small white ball of fur leapt up onto the back of the couch hissing and scratching. "Shit!" She jumped as sharp claws attached themselves into the material covering Bucky’s vibranium arm.

"Oh God, I'm so sorry!" Becca tried to retrieve the tiny white cat that was clinging to Bucky.

"It's okay," Bucky extricated the feline from its clutches.

You had rescued the photo album from his lap in case of accidents.

"Thanks, Ace." Bucky whispered appreciatively. "So who is this fiery fellow?"

"That's Alpine, our stupid cat that hates all of us."

Bucky held the small white feline up to his eyeline, its blue eyes locking onto his as he was held by the scruff of his neck. They stared into each other's eyes until the cat finally relaxed and offered Bucky a small 'meow'. He lowered Alpine into his lap where the cat curled up and closed its eyes.

"What did you just do?" Becca asked, her jaw practically hanging on the floor. 

You were equally as surprised, sitting quietly on the edge of the couch clutching the photo album to your chest to keep it safe.

Bucky shrugged, he reached out his hand to you so he could take back the album and keep looking through it. Becca talked him through each photograph. Bucky's eyes flicked between her face and the photos, listening so attentively all while his right hand was buried deep in Alpine's long white fur.

For the briefest of moments you felt a pang of jealousy. Bucky only ever looked at you with that much intent, that much interest and the thought of sharing that meant that you would be losing that part of him. You were glad that it was a fleeting moment, because you knew how much Bucky would gain from this and at the end of the day, you loved that for him, you rejoiced in his happiness, you loved him. 

You spent the next few hours silently watching your boyfriend being the most engaged in an activity than you'd ever seen him. As tempting as it was to join in on the conversation, you knew this was something that was for him and him alone.

"Look, coming here for a day to look at photos is all well and good. But is this what you really want?" Becca asked suddenly.

Bucky’s face fell in an instant. Is this what he really wanted? Getting close to people and risking losing everything all over again?

"Because everyone is ready to have you, but once you're in, you're in. No running away, no hiding. No pretending like we don't exist when it doesn't suit you.

"I understand that you are still out there, doing good things and that you might be away. But when you're here, you have to be here. Are you ready for that?"

Bucky looked over at you, but you couldn't quite decipher his expression. "Buck?" you tilted your head slightly, trying to understand him.

"I would like that, please." Bucky turned back to Becca. "But I have one… request, please."

Becca raised her eyebrows, almost inviting him to test her limits. You admired Becca’s fire and the clear lengths she was going to to protect her family. Bucky would do the same.

Bucky took a deep breath before making his request. "I'd like for Ace to come."

Both yours and Becca’s eyes went wide. She recovered from her surprise faster than you. Her reaction was a little different from yours as she burst out laughing at him.

Alpine hissed, having been woken by Becca’s outburst.

"Shhh, it's okay. I think your mom finds me funny," Bucky cooed, scratching his little friend's ears.

Who was this Bucky sitting beside you, asking for his family to accept him and you and cuddling a feral cat.

"Oh, no no, that thing's not my child. It's the spawn of the devil!" 

"Come on. He's not that bad."

"I have an idea. Why don't you keep her?"

"What? Wait-"

"No, it's perfect, look at her. She doesn't come anywhere near us and lashes out at me all the time. Look at this!" She pushed up her sleeves to show him the fading scratch marks on her arms. "She's going to a shelter if you don't."

Bucky looked over at you for permission. "Ace?"

"Hmmm?" You had stopped paying attention when he had asked Becca for you to be part of their family.

"Can we keep her?"

"What?"

"Alpine?"

How could you say no when he looked at you with those beautiful blue eyes? 

"You really want to?"

"Yeah," Bucky replied softly.

You nodded. "Then, yeah, we should keep her."

"And the other thing?"

"What's that thing you and Steve always say to each other? Oh yeah, I'm with you Buck, til the end of the line." You leaned over and pressed a kiss against his lips, avoiding the kitten he had cradled against his belly.

"So Becca, do you want to explain what you found so funny about my request?"

"It was funny that you felt the need to ask." She shook her head in disbelief. "What shocks me is that you two aren't already married."

Bucky’s cheeks flushed as you looked at him.

"It's alright. We're happy now." It was more of an empty reassurance, an attempt to take the pressure off Bucky. In reality you wanted nothing more than to be Bucky's wife but you weren't going to push him into a life he didn't want to lead, not after everything he had been through.

If he picked up on the sadness in your voice, he didn't say anything at that moment. He had no further chances as a cacophony of high pitched voices came floating in. "MOM!"

"And that's my actual spawn. Kids, come here. Say hi to your Uncle Bucky."

He received a chorus of greetings.

"This is my friend, Ace." Bucky introduced you. 

"Is she your girlfriend?" Tommy, the youngest piped up.

"Yes," Bucky smiled, taking your hand proudly.

"How are you holding Alpine?" Sarah, the eldest, asked.

"She's sleeping."

"She doesn't let anyone hold her."

"Uncle Bucky is special. How would you guys feel if we let him and Ace take care of Alpine for us?"

"Will we be able to visit her?" Tommy asked.

"Any time." Bucky smiled.

You shot him a look to tell him off for making promises which would be hard to keep.

"Can we say bye?" Sarah sniffled.

"Yes, but no touching!" Becca warned.

After a few tearful farewells which were watched with disgust by Alpine, Becca brought out her carrier. The kids lead you through to another room to pick up what they thought were Alpine's favorite toys.

Becca opened the carrier door while Bucky placed the cat at the entrance.

"Good luck," she muttered.

"Get in pal, we're going home."

To Becca’s immense surprise, Alpine walked in of his own accord.

"Well, she definitely is meant for you."

"Thank you." 

"You're doing me the favor."

"No, well yes, for Alpine. But thank you, for today. I-" Bucky had no idea how to express his gratitude for giving him back a connection to something he had lost so long ago. "Thank you."

"So Uncle Bucky-"

"You can just call me Bucky, you know?"

"I know." Becca smiled. "I also thought you might like this."

Bucky took the box Becca was holding out to him.

"It's some of Grams and Gramps's stuff. Your parents. You should have them."

"Becca-"

She threw her arms around Bucky's neck and whispered, "welcome home Uncle Bucky."

You came back to see Bucky gingerly returning her hug. He wasn't one for massive gestures of emotion, usually you and Steve were the only ones who he would hug, along with accepting Sam's enthusiastic shoulder grabs.

"Ready?" You asked him, having collected Alpine's essentials.

"Yeah."

"So we'll see you at the family picnic next week?" Becca smirked. "I know you already know the time and place."

Bucky blushed and nodded. "Thank you."

You let him carry Alpine and her things to the car and said your own goodbye to Becca. "Thanks for having us."

Bucky had strapped the carrier into the back seat so that it wouldn't topple at a sharp turn. It made you wonder how he would be as a father. Too soon to think about that.

You knew better than to bombarded him with questions, so you kept it simple. "Ready to go home?"

He smiled and nodded. As you pulled away, he opened the small box Becca had given him. Inside were a few photos and trinkets, but what caught Bucky's attention were the two wedding rings. He smiled. For the first time he thought about his future, your future together. Maybe he could have more, now that he had found you. 

​​

[elgaberino-mcoc]

MARVEL'S THE FRANKENSTEIN MONSTER has been added to the MCOC Wishlist 

Marvel picked up where Mary Shelley's classic novel left off. He hunts his creator's descendants, but sides with heroes otherwise. He is a very long-running, oft-recurring Marvel character, and deserves votes

[winters8child]

It´s been a long, long time

Chapter 22

I wondered if people throwing up and breaking down at the S.H.I.E.L.D. facility was nothing unusual, because no one seemed to be bothered by my outburst. Steve and I were still sitting in the chairs by Agent Carter’s desk, and I had calmed down enough to tell him the whole story. I recounted how I had loved his best friend since we were children, how we kissed in the bushes next to my house when I was 16, and what had happened the night before Bucky left for war. I told him how I tried not to act on my feelings, even though I loved him too. Steve didn’t interrupt me; he listened quietly, nodding occasionally but mainly remaining still, trying not to be emotional. When I finished, he put his head in his hands and stared at the floor, tapping his foot nervously. My nerves were frayed, and I wanted to give him time to process everything, but the longer he remained silent, the more I feared his reaction.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, placing my hand on his shoulder. The way he pulled away from me broke my heart; this was exactly what I had been so afraid of. Just then, Peggy walked up and said, “Howard will see you now,” glancing curiously at Steve’s state but choosing not to comment. He stood up without a word and followed her into the restricted area where Stark was working on his inventions. I quickly got up and followed them, trying to catch his attention. "Steve, talk to me... please say something... anything," I pleaded, but he didn’t even look at me. Peggy noticed the tension between us as she glanced back and forth, but Steve quickened his pace and shook his head.

I tried to focus on Stark and the things he was showing us as we walked around his lab. He had created a shield for Steve out of vibranium, one of the rarest metals on Earth, according to him. When it was my turn, he led me to a table full of weapons and handed me a handgun and a knife. I would have been disappointed if I wasn’t preoccupied with other things. I decided to try talking to Steve again, but before I could, he approached Howard and asked, “Are we done now?” Stark nodded, and Steve walked out without sparing me a glance. Peggy seemed to sense the tension and looked between us before running after him, calling his name.

I stood there, frozen, my mind and emotions in a whirlwind. Howard watched me with a questioning look, as if wondering why I was still in his lab. He approached with a smile, “Do you like fondue?”

It was a question I wasn’t expecting. “What’s fondue?” I asked, genuinely curious.

“It’s a Swiss melted cheese dish for dipping bread,” he explained.

“Why do you ask?” I tried to keep my frustration in check; I was not in the mood for small talk.

“You seem sad... I find that there’s nothing melted cheese can’t solve,” he said, his tone almost cheerful. I was puzzled by where this conversation was leading, and when I didn’t respond, he continued, “So what do you say, you and I and some fondue in the Swiss Alps?”

Was he flirting with me? I declined his offer, and as I turned to leave, he called after me, “Still, you should try some fondue.” What a strange man, but at least he managed to distract me from the impending end of my friendship with Steve.

The fact that I had told Steve everything and his reaction occupied my mind so completely that I pushed the memory of my pregnancy to the back of my thoughts. I wasn’t sure how to feel about it; I had wanted children in the future, but the current situation was far from ideal. Would I have changed my mind about getting the serum if S.H.I.E.L.D. had told me I was pregnant? What would Bucky have said if I’d told him we were expecting a child? Did I need to tell him now, when it was no longer relevant? I knew I had to talk to him, if only to let him know that I had been honest with Steve.

I walked to the hotel where we were all staying in London. Stepping into the lobby, I saw some of the Howling Commandos gathered. Dum Dum Dugan called out, “Mrs. America, up for a card game? Falsworth already owes me his house, his rifle, and the very pants he’s wearing. I’m getting bored,” he laughed. Normally, I would have joined them, but I wasn’t in the right state of mind for it. “Do you know where Bucky is?” I asked absently.

He pointed up the stairs. “He should be in his room. I haven’t seen him come out since breakfast.”

I thanked him and walked upstairs, stopping in front of his door. Taking a deep breath, I knocked. I heard his footsteps approach, and my heart raced as my hands grew sweaty.

“Who’s there?” he asked through the door.

“It’s me,” I replied.

The door opened, and he said, “Come in,” already walking into the sitting area of his room. It was dark, the curtains drawn over the windows, and his bed was unmade. I sat down next to him on the sofa and immediately began to tell him everything, almost everything. I spoke of Steve, his reaction, and how I felt about the entire situation.

“To be honest, I can’t blame him. He must feel betrayed,” Bucky murmured. “We should have told him a long time ago.”

I knew he was right. It must have been a shock for Steve to learn that his two best friends had been hiding their feelings for each other for the past ten years. Perhaps it was better to give Steve some time and let him come to me, but waiting in this state of uncertainty was exhausting.

“Can I stay here?” I asked, not wanting to be alone. It would drive me mad to sit in my room, swallowed by emotions and thoughts.

“Sure you can, doll,” Bucky said, pulling me into a comforting embrace. The smell of his cologne brought back a flood of emotions. I hoped that staying here might provide some relief now that everything was out in the open, but I still had that one little secret gnawing at me. Was there any point in telling him? Maybe it was something I should save for after the war, when we could return to our normal lives. I rested my head on his shoulder, breathing in his scent as he played with my hair. He kissed my forehead and smiled down at me, making my heart race.

Maybe staying here wasn’t the best idea after all. Before I could overthink everything, I gave him a gentle kiss on the lips. He looked unsure, his eyes questioning me. I pulled him closer by the lapels of his shirt and kissed him again. The world seemed to fade as the kiss deepened, our bodies pressing together in a desperate embrace. His hands roamed over my curves, his fingers tracing along my skin. The kiss grew more passionate, the desire building between us. Bucky lifted me into his arms and carried me to the bed. Without hesitation, he laid me down gently and climbed on top of me, our mouths never parting. There was an insatiable hunger in his touch, an urgency that guided him as he tugged at the hem of my shirt. I leaned forward to help him remove it, my breath catching as his hands trailed along my skin.

He quickly shed his own shirt, and as I admired his toned muscles, our bodies pressed together once more. We explored each other eagerly, the rest of our clothes discarded in our haste to be closer. Our passion grew, the kisses becoming rougher, the touches more demanding as we gave in to our carnal desires.

He grabbed a condom from the nightstand, put it on, and drove into me without hesitation, making me gasp as I clutched the sheets. Our bodies moved together with increasing force, a desperate need driving us to the edge of ecstasy. All inhibitions were shed as we sought release, our movements becoming frantic and urgent. His hands gripped my thighs as he thrust into me, his face buried in my neck as he kissed me there. The combination of sensations pushed me to the brink, and with a whispered, “I love you,” I reached my climax. Bucky followed with one final, intense push, and then he rested his forehead against mine, smiling as he caressed my face.

“I love you too, doll,” he whispered back.

In that moment, something inside me shattered. I was overwhelmed by emotions, tears streaming down my face. I shook my head, lost and unsure of where these feelings came from. I realized how different things could have been if I hadn’t insisted on getting the serum. Bucky pulled me into his arms, stroking my arm gently. “It’s alright. It’s normal to feel all these emotions after the high you just experienced,” he said softly.

I shook my head again. “That’s not it, Buck. There’s something I didn’t tell you.”

He sat up, wiping away my tears. “What is it, doll? You can tell me everything.”

It was now or never. He had a right to know, and I was tired of keeping secrets. “I was pregnant before I got the serum. I didn’t know, and S.H.I.E.L.D. didn’t tell me. I read it in my file… I was just an experiment to them, and now our baby is dead,” I sobbed

Next Chapter

[sonofcoulson]

1959 Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. series 2

S.H.I.E.L.D. has been running pretty smoothly for some time now. But a pair of terrible twins are about to disrupt things for the team…Fenris! They are older (77) in 1959 (their age is related to where The Gifted is in this timeline) and some of their story will be told in flashback.

They have been setting up Hellfire Club chapters around the world, trying to manipulate world events in the club's favour. They create terrorist incidents and blame them on other factions, plant misinformation etc. They have also been finding or rescuing promising mutants then enticing/forcing them to join.

Nathaniel Essex is referred to as "our employer" but never by name. No one has been able to work out how the bombs were planted in these incidents, but Howard works out that Fenris are the bomb, managing to link these incidents together and build up a profile for the now elderly Von Struckers. 

In a slight rework from the original The Gifted timeline, the London incident should be 1915 and it's the Police in pursuit, Rio should be 1930 with SSR investigating and pursuing. They manage to evade capture until this series. 

They chase them across the world after the latest incident in Plac Zamkovy, which kills hundreds. They can't figure out what gives them this power (no one knows about mutants, except Otto Strucker). They finally catch up with them and Andrea is killed before they can detonate. Andreas flees to grieve and consider his next move.

They have embedded themselves in Hydra to disguise their true allegiance.

Peggy, Howard, the Howling Commandos, Brian and Jacqueline Falsworth are all present but Adam Brashear is now off world and Sousa 'died' in 1955 as per original AoS s7 continuity. James Braddock (actor tbc) is more prominent here after being a background character previously, also he had "mystically given" powers, but kept them secret from all but a select few, also a great scientist. Very useful for S.H.I.E.L.D. and S.T.R.I.K.E.

As a second arc in this series Howard and Anton Vanko finalise their prototype for the arc reactor. Howard wants to keep developing it in secret, with a view to sharing it when he is sure it can't be copied or duplicated without them both. He has learned his lesson from season 1 of Agent Carter where some of his technology was dangerously flawed or misappropriated. He doesn't want the arc reactor rushed. He doesn't want the technology to fall into the wrong hands. Vanko wants to patent it and start selling the idea straight away. 

Vanko: It's too important not to share it right now.

Stark: I see that it could help the world right now, but I am not prepared to compromise on safety or security. If we rush out a design that could be reverse engineered relatively easily it could start another world war.

V: You just don't want to share the technology with Russia, do you? You think Russia is Leviathan? You think I am with Leviathan? I have known you 13 years Howard…

S: Now Anton, it's not like that, I just need to put in some checks and bal-

V: You want to take all the credit! Where is the proof I was involved in the design if there is no patent?

S: Now wait a minute Anton-

V: You want all the profit too?

S (scoffs): This shouldn't be about money.

V: This is easy for you to say. You live in America like a billionaire,  I live here like a Russian immigrant.

S: I pay you well enough Anton…Let's just…let's just cool off…talk about this in the morning. We can work this out.

V (tersely): Good night, Mr Stark.

By the next morning, Vanko has gone and so have the blueprints. S.H.I.E.L.D. tracks him down and recover the blueprints and hand him over to the company lawyers who have him charged and deported. Howard is too angry to object to the industrial espionage charges or the deportation. He does, however, offer to pay Vanko his share of any profits their design makes. Vanko refuses, arrogantly thinking he can recreate the designs on his own in Russia. He cannot and ends up drunk and destitute setting up Iron Man 2.

Post credits:-

With the Fenris bomb duo out of the picture, we see Sebastian Shaw at the Las Vegas chapter of the Hellfire Club taking a phone call from his employer saying he "would be delighted to be the new black king". After he hangs up he says "now to find myself a queen".

[themculibrary]

Bucky Barnes Time Traveling Masterlist

1946 (fanfiction.net) - WintersSunrise T, 36k

Summary: When a mercenary presumed dead threatens to unravel a timeline, Bucky Barnes and Sam Wilson are thrust back to 1946 where the fates of Peggy Carter, Howard Stark, and S.H.I.E.L.D. hang in the balance. They navigate a painful past fraught with post-war shadows while deciding whether to preserve the timeline or remake it.

21st Century Brooklyn Boys (ao3) - khaosNotRefundable T, 121k

Summary: In which Steve & Bucky from the 1930s wind up time-traveling to the 21st century and finally run into each other...sort of. Brooklyn’s still Brooklyn. Only bustling, shiny, and very expensive. Bucky wants to know why this little yahoo of his is now Big and Sad. And Steve’s pretty certain the last time he saw him, Bucky wasn’t a very confused, quiet, long-haired, dangerous version with so many knives…and a metal arm…

OR:

Who’d’ve thunk procrastinating an arts assignment could save two pals in another century?

Cross the Same River Twice (ao3) - littlerrhymes steve/bucky T, 5k

Summary: In the fall of 1940, a stranger with Bucky's face saves Steve and Bucky's lives. The stranger claims he's from the future and that his only mission is to protect Steve Rogers.

Ghosts of War (ao3) - eden22 steve/bucky E, 112k

Summary: The Winter Soldier was never meant to survive that final mission. The Winter Soldier returns to HYDRA soaked in blood and water anyways, Captain America and Insight both dead at the bottom of the river.

HYDRA has failed. HYDRA cannot have failed. HYDRA decides to give the Winter Soldier one last chance to shape the century.

If killing Captain America didn't work, maybe killing Steve Rogers will.

It remembers you (ao3) - often_adamanta steve/bucky T, 13k

Summary: When the Asset fails to complete his mission and kill Captain America on the bridge, HYDRA decides to take a more drastic approach to changing to world. The Asset is sent back in time to kill Steve Rogers before he becomes Captain America in order to erase him from history. Soon he’s dealing with failing his mission a second time and coming face to (masked) face with his own past.

I've Heard That Song Before (ao3) - Pokimoko steve/peggy T, 95k

Summary: In the year since he broke free from HYDRA, Bucky Barnes has been trying to rediscover himself, searching for who he was in the words of history books and within the memories he is slowly recovering. While journeying through Hungary, he meets a mysterious old woman who promises to help him. He accepts, not realising that her idea of helping involves time travel.

He gets sent back to 1944, into the body of his younger self. Bucky, with no clear idea of how to return to the future, tries his best to rediscover the Bucky that Steve, Peggy, and the Howling Commandos know him to be, whilst also having to deal with a mission straight out of his worst nightmares.

Journey Home (ao3) - EiraLloyd steve/bucky T, 14k

Summary: One moment, Bucky was raiding a Hydra base alongside the Avengers. The next, he was stuck in November 1943, with no way back home and no one to trust. Not even a day later, Steve walked into his room at a London inn and kissed him.

What the hell was going on?

Leave Yourself Behind (ao3) - raendown sam/bucky T, 76k

Summary: “It’s a very long story,” he said.

Well, that wasn’t exactly true. The basic truth itself could be summed up real easy: that guy right there is me from the future and that’s his pal Sam, also from the future. All the details and the questions afterwards - only half of which got actual answers - that’s what really took so long.

When a version of himself from the future is brought back to the past right in front of him suddenly HYDRA isn't the most interesting thing in this war. But the more time Bucky spends with himself and the new companion who came with him, the more questions he finds himself with. How much time has really passed? How much can one man be changed from himself? Who is this Sam - and what will he grow to mean to Bucky?

Operation Hindsight (ao3) - DCAngst T, 111k

Summary: When Steve chases the assassin who shot Fury, he realizes the sniper is strong, fast, and has a metal arm...but he's not the only player in the game. Who is the other guy on the roof—the one who may have just saved Steve's life?

Synopsis: Bucky and Sam travel from 2024 to 2014 to thwart Hydra agents armed with knowledge of the future from changing the timeline. To do that, Bucky has to stop the Winter Soldier from assassinating Captain America.

Out Of Time (ao3) - ibroketuesday steve/bucky E, 38k

Summary: Bucky can't remember anything before Hydra. He doesn't want to know about his life. That's the way it has to be: Bucky Barnes was a monster, and the past is in the past.

Or: in which Steve and Bucky are thrown back to 1937, where they have to figure out how to get home, work together, and, as another time traveler hunts them down, simply stay alive.

Savage God (ao3) - LenneWithMilkAndHoney, PottersPink steve/bucky M, 36k

Summary: Past, present, future, Steve knows Bucky Barnes. It’s why he recognized him when he found him in that alley in April of 1942, even though Bucky was older, stronger, wearier; he called himself The Asset, and had a metal fucking arm. He flinched when Steve tried to touch him, and when Steve told him he loved him, his first response was to ask why.

The Asset was only with Steve in 1942 for a few days, but it’s enough to change the course of Steve’s life forever; the journey to becoming Captain America is coloured with urgency, with an undercurrent of fear and determination that in the end he just can’t manage to hide from everyone — But it was all for nothing. Steve saves Bucky from Zola, just to lose him on the train. Their second chance, wasted.

Seventy years later, Steve wakes up in the twenty-first century, and he doesn’t know whether to be heartbroken or hopeful when some of the things Bucky revealed to him in 1942 start falling into place.

The Future Looks Bleak Without You (ao3) - syriala bucky/tony G, 3k

Summary: Bucky had known that joining the Avengers after everything he went through would mean some really strange stuff would continue to happen to him. Seeing a future version of himself in the living-room still hadn't made his list.

“Jesus, I’m Bucky, I’m from the future, would you please put the gun down before you kill yourself.”

“Shut up!” the Soldier barked. “What’s your mission?” he asked because it was apparent that he would not get a satisfactory answer out of the intruder.

“I’m cupid.”

Thermotemporal Equations (ao3) - Blinky the Tree Frog (blinkytreefrog) T, 48k

Summary: Bucky Barnes is used to strange happenings; his time with the Howling Commandos has guaranteed that. He's therefore not totally thrown off balance when he wakes up in an extraordinary tower in a seemingly impossible year. He can’t help but be worried though, no matter how much reassurance he's getting from Steve and his new team.

to memory now I can't recall (ao3) - Etharei steve/bucky E, 102k

Summary: While on a mission storming a HYDRA facility, James Buchanan Barnes touches one of the many strange alien devices collected by the Red Skull. He does this, in fact, twice— in the past, and in the future.

Next thing he knows, Bucky Barnes is opening his eyes in the 21st century, which is full of great gadgets and coffee, and at least includes his old pal Steve. (And, inexplicably, a different Stark.) Meanwhile, the Winter Soldier finds himself in the middle of World War Two, helping Captain America hunt down HYDRA (which is at least familiar), pretending to be Bucky Barnes (which is not), and figuring out the very noisy group of soldiers who call themselves the Howling Commandos.

When In Brooklyn (ao3) - McBiteypants, Spintwin E, 191k

Summary: Bucky Barnes arrives at the Sokovian memorial to take Baron Zemo into custody only for the multiverse to crack open at exactly that moment and throw the two of them back to somewhere that’s very familiar to Bucky: 1940s Brooklyn.

Winter Solider: Resurrection (ao3) - DCAngst G, 38k

Summary: In 2024, Bucky Barnes follows a lead about more super soldier serum that takes him to Siberia. He encounters the unexpected and finds himself in 2014, shortly after the Winter Soldier vanished.

Winter Undone (ao3) - DCAngst steve/bucky T, 74k

Summary: What if, after the Endgame battle, Dr. Strange used the time stone to save Tony and undo 80 years of Hydra for Bucky? In other words, 1945 Bucky ends up in 2023 and has to come to terms with...a lot.

[extraordinary-heroes]

Howling Commandos of S.H.I.E.L.D. Vol 1 #3 (Cover art by Brent Schoonover)

[nekoannie-chan]

Secrets Chapter 10: The Only Friends I've Ever Had

Pairing: Steve Rogers X OFC, Brock Rumlow X OFC.

Word count: 1591 words.

Summary: Sometimes keeping secrets can be dangerous or a heavy burden, which is what Kathleen has been doing for years. She will also be in charge of guiding Steve Rogers into this century; meanwhile, S.H.I.E.L.D. will be looking for a way to kick-start the Avengers Initiative by integrating her as one of the superheroes, but that won't be the only danger they face.

Warnings: Arguing, sad.

A/N: After long time working on this longfic, I finally post it. If you wanna be added to the taglist, let me know.

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics to be posted on other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other's people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and are not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

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You can read it on Wattpad and Ao3 too. Secrets masterlist. Previous chapter. Next chapter.

Steve was watching a documentary about the Second World War on the laptop that Kathleen had lent him. After several days, he had finally learned to use it, stopped the video, and saw the military uniform that he wore when he was not on a mission. He grabbed the files. Finally, after a month, he was going to dare to see them. He opened the folder and began to see the tokens. They were from his companions in the Howling Commandos, all dead. Until he reached Peggy's file, He held it between his fingers, felt a turn in his heart, and began to read it carefully. There was the current residence address and a telephone number. Should he dial that number and call it? Wouldn't he still remember it?

He closed his eyes and put the token aside along with the others. He couldn't do it; he could appear out of nowhere. Everyone believed that Steve Rogers had died. He took the next one. It was Howard Stark's. He was also dead. He put it with the others. It caught his attention that there was one more token. He watched her carefully, putting his hand on his chin thoughtfully. He couldn't describe the feeling he had; it was between confusion, anger, and disappointment.

He put on his jacket and, for the first time since he woke up, he went for a walk. He walked the streets; there was so much change. Now there was a lot of noise; he was practically infested with vendors. He kept walking until he reached a coffee shop near Stark Tower. He ordered a coffee and, on a piece of paper, he started to draw the nearby buildings. He had not noticed the waitress's presence until she spoke.

"Waiting for the big guy?" The waitress asked, and Steve raised his head and looked at her blankly. "Ironman," the woman turned to the sky."Many people eat here just to see him fly."

"That's right," Steve replied, looking up at the sky. The woman watched him carefully. He pulled out his wallet.

She brought him more coffee. "So, we have free Wi-Fi," she said, walking away from the table.

" Radio?" Steve was confused, so he would ask Kathleen what that was. Surely she would know. The waitress saw it as funny because she managed to listen.

"Don't be silly, ask for her number," said the old man at the nearby table.

After this, Steve took the train. He felt like he didn't fit in; what would he do with his life? He knew he had a position at S.H.I.E.L.D., but did he want to get started with it? He was depressed; there was too much news, both good and bad; so many changes had occurred in those almost seventy years; however, he did not belong at that time. He came to a gym; at least he should have some hobby or something that could help him get everything he had inside. He would return to practicing boxing.

He was furiously hitting the bag. He had completely lost track of time. When he left the gym, he realized how late it was. It was probably past ten o'clock at night.

Meanwhile, in the house, Kathleen moved nervously. She didn't know where Steve was. He had left the cell phone in the house. The city was very complicated. If Fury found out, he would surely kill her. He didn't know what to do. She was already desperate. He could look for him in the vicinity without success. He could look for the minds of other mutants, but to look for the human one, he needed what he had stored in the secret place. Suddenly, he heard the door open and breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that it was he who entered and approached him.

"Where were you, Steve?" I asked you not to go out alone yet, or at least you could have left a note warning. I was worried...

"I don't have to tell you where I'm going." You're not my mother. I think I'm old enough to know what I'm doing. Your concern is not me, but losing your job. If something happens to me, you know I'm the mission that Fury left you!" Steve yelled at him.

She was startled, not knowing what to say. He had never spoken to her like this. He was always chivalrous and tender with her. When he passed by her, she perceived the chaos in his head. He was depressed. She heard the slamming of the door coming from Steve's room.

She went to her room and took photos of her best friends from her hiding place. She missed them; she had lost them because of her; even her other friend was upset about the situation; she was alone again; she kept crying.

Neither of them was able to sleep that night; Steve felt bad about how he had treated her; he unfairly took it out on her, and all the anger he had in store had come out; it had not been her fault, that the plane crashed and he would end up frozen, nor of everything he had lost; she was as lonely as he was; she could see it in her eyes. She always tried to show that she was cheerful, but her eyes reflected the opposite. The next morning, she left her room. She would go to buy flowers, and although she did not know what her favorites were or if that was still being done, she would give them to her and apologize. What she did not expect was to find her in the kitchen because he was always the first to wake up. She was having a cup of tea and immersed in her thoughts with a lost look.

"Kath..." he approached her, "I..."

"I don't see you as my mission, Steve," she interrupted. "I think if Fury said I would help you adapt, it was because he wanted him to have at least a friend he could trust," she continued. He looked at her without understanding. He also didn't understand why she wasn't angry. "Are you afraid of me for who I am?" She looked directly into his eyes.

"No, why should I be afraid of you?" Steve noticed the woman's swollen, red eyes. He guessed she had been crying all night.

"Well, because I’m a mutant," she sighed, "because of the problem that existed years ago with mutants, many believe that we are failed experiments or that we want to end humanity, but what they never say are the consequences." We survived with very few. When I was three years old, I began to show that I had powers, and that was when my parents decided to go to Japan to be safe. There, practically all the mutants went unnoticed. They feared that the sentinel services or the government would go after us because, although their files do not say it, my whole family is a mutant. "You know, there I met a woman who was also a mutant, the first in her family, but a few years later, according to official reports, she couldn't control her powers and die." She took a sip.

Steve looked at her attentively. He preferred not to interrupt. She never talked about her, but she always listened to everything he told her. Could it be that she also felt like a monster?

"I don't know how a man from another country contacted my dad." He had twins, a year older than me. He asked my parents to help their children learn to control their powers because no one else in their family had and they didn't know what to do. The twins and I became best friends. On vacation, sometimes they stayed with me, and sometimes I went to their country and stayed with them. We got into trouble together," he smiled as he remembered.

" Why?" He was very curious. "You're someone very nice. I find it strange that you don't have any more friends or any suitors." They both blushed.

"People are afraid of mutants; I had already told you that the children and their families started to be afraid of us; the kids at school bothered me; they made jokes, they hid my things, and so on; no one would hang out with me, so I was always alone," she said. Steve felt identified; similar things were done to him for being weak, and the only one who defended him was Bucky. "The twins were my only friends, but when they were ten years old they lost their parents, then mine took care of them too, and then something horrible happened with other friends we had; they discovered the horrible secret of their parents and ran away, but also what happened to them was unexpected, and as a consequence, I started to have nightmares.” My friend helped me with them; she was the only one who could help me with them; she did what I did with you when you had them; she was the only one who could help me."

"What happened to them?" He interrupted; he didn't think it was something so serious, but he remembered all the trouble he got into.

"They trusted someone they shouldn't have; the twins and I were too late to save them."

She didn't mention Saori, but what had happened to her still hurt. Besides, the only one who knew was Brock; if only she had arrived in time...

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