#i am just now realizing that I don’t think I have rambled about my somewhat stupid au on here

[sandwichedbread]

since poultry man is back I thought I’d make a proper sketch of my design and I also added my really cool weapon ideas

[moonstruckme]

happy new year lovie!!!! i feel bad for requesting this bc just thinking ab the volume of ur inbox is a little overwhelming and ive gone a bit overboard 😭

but..... bodyguard!james finds out his mum is quite sick right before his shift one day and leaves to take care of her after letting reader know. he has to take the week off and reader is visiting and bringing them their favorite homecooked meals everyday (which she has memorised bc, bless him, james loves to talk abt his mum) and james is LOVEEESTRUCK. she's there, bright and early every morning (with a different bodyguard bc god forbid she leaves the house with no protection right in front of james' own two eyes!!!) with muffins and flowers and bags of food in hand :( james is enamored and so sweet on her!!!!! and reader is obsessing over how vulnerable and emotionally in tune james is at a time like this!!!!! i'm thinking maybe confessions are getting pretty hard to hold back by the end of the week ☹️🩷

thank you! (if you do decide to write this or if you dont for letting me ramble on in your asks x)

Don't feel bad my love! Thank you for requesting :)

cw: sick family member

bodyguard!James x fem!reader ♡ 1.3k words

No matter how many times James has visited home throughout his adult life, he always manages to discover something he’s forgotten about living there. Like how particular his mum is about the way the dish towel is folded, or which drawer the scissors are kept in, or the ungodly amount of door-to-door salesmen that come by on a daily basis. 

Lately, he’s being plagued by the last. He recalls them being vaguely annoying when he was younger, but James’ family is currently going through a difficult time that leaves one with somewhat frayed nerves. He very nearly snapped at a particularly tenacious primary school student selling chocolate yesterday. Not one of his finer moments. 

So when the doorbell rings while his mum is trying to sleep down the hall, James has to make an effort to reel his wrath back in before he’s even answered it. 

Funnily enough, any negative emotion completely evaporates when he sees you on the front steps. 

“Hi,” you say, looking apprehensive. 

“Hi,” James echoes. He opens the door the rest of the way, nodding to the fill-in guard you’ve brought with you. “Hey, Singh.”

Singh nods in return. 

“I hope it’s alright that I just came by.” You give him a sheepish sort of smile. “I didn’t even realize I don’t have your phone number until now. You’re always just…there.” 

James laughs, the mood that’s descended over him since getting the call about his mum lifting slightly. “Yeah, I suppose I am. What brings you out, sweetheart?” 

You hoist the bags you’re carrying a bit higher in your arms. “I brought some stuff for you and your mom, if that’s okay.” 

A tiny hand fists around his heart, squeezing pleasantly. “Course it is,” he all but coos. “Come on in. Singh, you alright to stay here and keep watch?” 

Luckily, the other man doesn’t think to remember that James is currently on leave, and so defers to him with a curt nod. James shoots him a smile as you come inside, closing the door behind you. 

“They put Singh on day shift?” he asks, taking one of the bags from you and leading you into the kitchen. “He’s barely finished training.” 

“He seems fine,” you say in your good-natured way. 

“He took you to a location that’s never been reconned without even bringing another guard to post outside.” 

“It’s your mom’s house, Jamie.” The smile is evident in your voice, sweeter even than the smell wafting out of these bags. God, he’s missed you. “I doubt he suspects either of you are going to try and hurt me.” 

“He should be prepared for the possibility,” James says, but he can’t manage to work any menace into his tone even to tease you. You tilt your head at him, mouth curving up to one side like you’re well acquainted with his particular brand of silliness, and he lets his grievances go instantly. “You didn’t have to bring us anything, angel face.” 

You flush a bit at the endearment, directing a soft smile down at his family’s old wooden table (which is great, because now James is in the position of being jealous of a table). “I wanted to do something,” you reply simply. “How’s your mom?” 

“She’s alright.” Not great. Not worse, which is always good. If the only thing he accomplishes in a day is that she doesn’t get worse, James can feel good about that. “She’s sleeping in this morning.” 

“Oh, shit.” Your voice drops to a hush like the breeze blowing through leaves. “I haven’t woken her, have I?” 

James grins. “No, you’re good. She can sleep through anything.” 

You lose a breath. “Right, well I brought some meals to last you a few days,” you say, digging some containers out of the bag. “It can all be heated up whenever you’re ready to eat, and—oh, also some flowers. I know it’s stupid, but I thought they might brighten things up for you two.” James doesn’t think it’s stupid at all, but you go on before he can tell you so. “Can I put these in your freezer? I brought some muffins for this morning too, if you want them.” 

“Yeah,” James says, the word leaving him on a breath. “I mean, yeah to both. Thank you.” He grabs several of the containers as well, showing you to the freezer. You both start cramming them in between things, wherever they’ll fit. He takes note of the food as it goes in, a heady warmth growing in his chest. “Did you make all of this?” 

You hum in brisk affirmation. “I had plenty of time on my hands yesterday. Turns out things are pretty boring without you around.” 

“How’d you know what to make? This is all—these are our favorites.” 

You turn to him, a tenderhearted sort of smile curving your lips. “You talk about your mom a lot, Jamie,” you say. “I know all her favorites by now. And the things she’d make that were your favorites, too.” 

James hadn’t realized he’d spent so much time rambling about his mum. It hurts his chest a bit to think of it now, worse to think that you’d been listening so intently. 

“This is only really enough to get you through a few days,” you go on, oblivious to his yearning, “but I figured I’d come back with more if you’re both alright with it.” You look at him as you pack the last of the food away, your gaze careful. “I don’t want to intrude or anything.” 

“You could never intrude.” James isn’t sure how he gets the words out, his heart ballooning until it’s nearly cutting off his airflow. The cool air breezing onto one side of his face stops, and he realizes you’ve shut the freezer. “This is just…so, so kind of you. I don’t know what to say.” 

“James.” Your voice is soft. Your smile has faded, and now you look at him with an unabashed, steady kindness. “You don’t have to say anything. I can’t stand the thought of you and your mom going through this. I wanted to help, somehow.” One of your shoulders comes up in a sheepish half-shrug. “Even if it’s really small.” 

He wraps his arms around your shoulders, and you hesitate only a second before bringing your arms around him too. You squeeze him tight. James lets himself relish the feel of it, lovelorn. “It’s not small,” he says fervently. “It really…it means a lot, sweetheart.” 

You only squeeze tighter in response. When he lets you go, your gaze is sad. Worried. You ask without prelude, “Are you doing okay?” 

James gives you a half-smile. The truth of it. “Yeah, we’re alright over here. It’s hard to see her like this, but I think everything’s going to be okay.” You nod, solemn in your understanding. “Sounds like I might be doing better than you, actually, if your company’s bad enough that you’re entertaining yourself in the kitchen all day.” 

You crack a smile at that, and James’ heart lightens. “Yeah, Singh’s no you. He doesn’t seem to like to chat.” 

“Ahh, so that’s why you’ve really come out here, yeah? You just missed me.” 

“You’ve caught me.” 

It’s said like a joke, but James’ pride inflates foolishly nonetheless. “I hate that I can’t be there,” he says. “Especially now that I know they’ve put Singh on my shift.” 

“He’s not so bad,” you laugh, heading towards the table. You fold up the bags. “Anyway, it’s more important that you’re here. And I’ll be back in a couple days to restock you.” 

James fixes you with a look as you start for the door. “You really don’t have to.” 

“I’m going to,” you say breezily. “Don’t forget to put the flowers in water, and the muffins are strawberry chocolate chip.” He grins. His mum’s favorite. “I’ll tell Singh you were raving about him.” 

“Oh, please do.” He rolls his eyes, feeling lighter than he has in days. “Thanks, angel.” 

You shoot him a smile worthy of the moniker as you go out the door. “See you in a couple days, Jamie.”

[ghcstao3]

Hi please keep rambling about your DBH AU it’s so well written and amazing! I love the characterisations of everyone and how you handled their relationships there in. My favourite part was Ghost thinking he’s a coward but he’s not he’s just been so badly hurt and when everyone learns about his past they don’t blame him for trying to protect himself they actually try and comfort him 😭 god damn that made me cry

Anyway it wouldn’t be annoying at all it’s obvious by the care and effort you put into writing it that you love this au.

apparently i am. a liar. but i still have a few thoughts about this AU

separating it into two parts:

misc:

- soap used to be a child caretaker android. he still keeps contact with the family, who have always treated him like one of their own

- for that reason also, he was somewhat eased into deviancy. he never even realized it first, because he’d always been happy as is—it was the sense of purpose that ticked him off, the want to try something new and completely different to what he’d always known

- ghost has heterochromia essentially for the same reason as markus (optics damage)

- ghost doesn’t remember much prior to his deviancy. roba erased a lot of memories, and sometimes he still experiences minor memory loss here and there, if it’s something from years prior. those pieces are still stored somewhere, but ghost has never bothered to go searching

post-reveal:

- soap is the only individual other than himself that ghost trusts to do repairs. even still he’s reluctant, at first, only letting soap help with the parts he can’t reach, but eventually even the simplest fixes he has soap work on

- unfortunately ghost isn’t given much of a choice but to reveal himself to the team about a year later, when he’s injured and price and gaz get a scare out of soap tearing ghost open to fix the worst of the damage and at least have him functional until they could get parts

- (it’s just a bit traumatic to watch your sergeant open your lieutenant’s chest. just a little)

- ghost still pretends like he isn’t an android around them, however. it’s how he’s acted forever now and it’s a difficult habit to quit—may not even be possible to quit. they wouldn’t treat him any differently, though, and he realizes that now with a slight guilt

- going back to soap’s ‘family’, he even goes so far as to bring ghost home to them, like he’s seen and read in movies and books. they’re more than happy to meet ghost and welcome him into their home—a glimpse of kindness ghost seldom sees, so he decides that they’re not so bad (meaning he memorizes every detail of their lives and interests, just so he can know the people who cared for soap in return for his service)

- both ghost and soap’s white casing are very scuffed and scratched, but if you look closely at their wrists, you may find one another’s initials etched into the plastic

[ectogeo-rebubbles]

Can I have Siskarak fanfic recs, please? I've only read a few (can't remember too well at 3AM; one on the Defiant comes to mind), and I was surprised by how well the vibe worked!

Oh absolutely. 😈 Fair warning that I’m gonna rec a LOT of my own fics bc I’m shameless like that, but also because I’ve written like 25% of the Siskarak fics that exist. 😂 Of course in addition to my little ramblings, please check all the tags and summaries on these and just read the ones that speak to you! 💖 And now, in no particular order:

so, I lied, I cheated by me - My beloved siskarak novella!! 🥰 It’s an In the Pale Moonlight AU where Sisko and Garak fake an affair to explain why they are meeting together secretly all the time now, so that no one will realize it’s actually bc they’re conspiring to bring the Romulans into the war. It’s a VERY cracky premise, and I then treat the implications of that premise with the utmost severity haha. It’s a big clusterfuck of them making each other worse and ruining each other’s lives but I did aim for a hopeful ending for them and for their healthier relationships (siskasidy and garashir). I’m so proud of it, I have some planted some insane character insights into there that I truly can’t figure out other simpler ways to express/convince people of than by writing them into a complicated angsty porny ITPM-but-way-worse fic.

And Scene by Flazéda (peternurphy) - Obsessed with this one. Sisko and Garak have to go undercover at a sex club, and I am just such a sucked for fake relationship scenarios. I’m also never not thinking about the moment in this fic where Sisko muses internally on how spanking Garak’s ass with a paddle is satisfying in the same way as swinging a baseball bat.

Moonlight Still Casts Shadows by Warpcorps @spocksbeanies - This one is SO HOT. It’s post-ITPM and Sisko is continuing to compromise his morals in delicious, sexy ways to accomplish his goals. 😈 (He’s having sex with Garak to keep him happy and working for him.)

Decadence: In His Service by JA Chapman is soooo good and sooo insane and I want to read approximately 10k more words about the messy, messy scenario described. Siskarak is only a secondary ship, the main one shown is Sloan/Sisko. I don’t particularly buy into it as realistic, but this fic ask all kinds of questions and offers NO answers, and I am driven insane by it every day, I do still recommend. XD

Exaltation by @hellostuffedtiger is another good one involving Sloan and it is much closer to canon than the above hahaha. Sisko and Garak have casual sex, then discuss S31 and Sloan and how to protect Bashir.

going up, going down by me - Crackfic to the max, haha! Garak gives Sisko a blowjob in the turbolift and they get caught.

Plausible Deniability by katiemariie is really interesting and reading it helped kick off my interest in the ship! I do have some small quibbles with it bc I don’t really buy that Garak isn’t interested in Bashir or that Siskarak could actually become a sustainable romantic ship, but oh man other than that the dynamic is great here!

Captain’s Whore by @the-last-dillpickle - Garak pettily making sure everyone knows he’s Sisko’s mistress is just so fun and delightful 😂

partners in crime by anonymous - A tasty little post-ITPM PWP where Sisko does a bit of introspection about himself and Garak’s effect on him.

you’re a criminal as long as you’re mine by me - This might be the one on the Defiant you’re thinking of. It’s set during Second Skin. I wanted to write a lower stakes, chiller, flirtier Siskarak dynamic here and I really really like how it turned out 🥰

A few more very short fics by me:

me and the devil walking side by side

lying down with dogs

dirty little secret

never loved nobody fully (alternate Siskarak ending) (there’s also a podfic of this drabble by klb and blackglass and horchatapods… I know at least one of you is on tumblr and I can’t remember which rn)

Not super shippy but def have some fun and somewhat charged Sisko and Garak interactions:

Farce of the Prophets by @cardassiangoodreads - This one involves Garak messing with Sisko a little bit haha. It’s got those fake relationship elements I love so dearly 🥰

Dance of Fools by stuffedtiger - More Siskarak fake relationship stuff 😈 They dance 🥰

redacted by me - Garak and Sisko figuring out how to work together when they are both stationed on Starbase 375 at the beginning of s6.

This was so fun to put together, thanks for this ask, I love gushing about my fave siskarak fics 💖

[clownboymcchucklefuck]

Zecharias Theory

Before I start rambling, I do want to say that surprisingly a song lyric was what inspired me to write this theory because it made me think of Zecharias and therefore my brain started going off the charts with theorizing. I’ve also wanted to do something with Zecharias for a while now so if this also ends up being a analysis and also a theory at the same time then yall gonna have to deal with it.

“But you made me want to plan out my last days on earth, eating you. The tips of your teeth fit perfect in me. You’re a shower of light I’d devour any day of the week.” -LIGHT SHOWER by Melanie Martinez.

Now you might be thinking how this made me go into full theory mode. So let me explain.

It’s been mentioned a few times/implied that Zecharias has had muses before MC and in the NSFW alphabet it has even mentioned somebody but I’ve only seen who ever this person is mentioned in this one part and hasn't even been asked about smh.

“He hasn't been able to meet a lot of other people, much less get the chance to do the deed with them. At most, he likely could have done it with one person, but they're as inexperienced as he is.

Who is this person? Well, you’ll find out in the game. :>”

But here’s my thing, if what we know about Zecharias not being human then he’s probably immortal especially that I’ve noticed a few implications that he might be a god or demi-god (Hell, bring Percy Jackson into this and say possibly half-blood.) with one part of Be My Muse and there was a few lines about MC being into greek mythology and he brought up the god Mnenmosyne. (HELP I JUST REALIZED THAT'S HIS LAST NAME WHY AM I ONLY PUTTING THIS TOGETHER WHILE I'M WRITING THIS) Well now that I just figured that out it just puts more evidence to back up my theory and of course with all of those powers he has and everything. Now I know that in the SFW alphabet did somewhat imply that he would die for MC if it was to protect them but I think that just might have been figurative language. .

Zecharias eats people too, but it’s also been said he just does this as a way to survive so I’m not about to bash him about that.

“He’s only interested in adults to be his muse or his meals.”

ANYWAYS, Finally to my main theory that made me write this. Zecharias is likely immortal or lives for a very long time. But (from what we know) all of his muses have been human including MC. It makes me wonder what happened to the old muses, I mean of course it’s very likely they died inside of the backrooms, maybe from old age or something else. BUT that also brings the question of what happened to their bodies so going back to the lyrics that made me think up of this theory. I think it’s very possible that Zecharias could have probably eaten the old muses? Since its for his survival to eat humans and him being obsessed with them could prove this. Or he might just have those fuckers stored somewhere in the backrooms lmao.

I don’t know what else to go on about without going into a full analysis of Zecharias which would include me going more into what we know about his backstory so far and me explaining his motives and all that good stuff but I guess I’ll see how this theory does before starting to write all of that jfnlaajan.

Also keep in mind that this is all a theory, A YANDERE VN THEORY- *gets hit with fridge*

Word count: 647.

Zecharias belongs to @letmeremindyouvn

_______________________________

Taggy tags:

@dont-wannadothis-anymore @mr-ritza @mysticnebula

[letters-from-the-4077]

4x18: Hawkeye

Dear Dad,

I am concussed. So so so many concussions. You’d think my brain was made of gelatin the way it wobbles and wibbles. I don’t think wibbles is a word.

Mr. BJ is writing this letter for me. Actually, it’s Dr. BJ. Dr. Hunnicutt of the 4077th MASH unit.

My head hurts. But I wanted to you know that I am okay. 

You know what’s funny? If I didn’t write to you to tell you that I’m okay, you would never have known that there was a chance I’m not okay, which means that this letter is net zero information. The unknown and being not okay cancel each other out and then you carry the two and then you get me, your son, being okay.

Your bestest okay-est son,

Hawkeye

.

Dr. Pierce,

This is BJ writing now. I suppose I also wrote the top bit, but only because I don’t think Hawkeye would’ve been able to hold a pen and focus on the page at the same time, and even he seemed to realize that. Correspondence when it comes to Hawkeye is surprisingly difficult. Lots of “stops” and “wait don’t actually write that.” Hopefully I got enough of what Hawkeye was trying to say. Even concussed, his brain moves faster than his mouth.

He is going to be okay, just so you know. Nobody’s really quite sure what happened and he’s either too concussed or too guarded (or both) to tell us anything more than the basics, but he’s back safe at the 4077th, and nobody’s about to let him out of their sight for the next couple of days. I’m sitting on an extra bed in post-op now, writing this letter to you. Hawkeye’s finally resting and I felt that what he told you might’ve caused more worry than what should’ve been assuaged, which is why I’ve decided to continue it. 

I hope that’s not too forward of me. I’d write you a whole new letter but I wouldn’t want that to cause even more concern, and besides, paper’s in high demand out here. Everything’s in high demand, actually. 

But Hawkeye is going to be just fine, if not in need of a few weeks of bed rest, God help me when I have to actually tell him that. I’m sure you know better than I, but Hawk’s not too into staying in one place and resting until it’s the only thing he seems to do. 

He hasn’t confirmed it yet, but Radar—that’s the company clerk, I’m sure Hawkeye’s told you about him—said that there was an overturned jeep next to a small local village, and he’s pretty sure Hawkeye was in it when it crashed. Radar said he didn’t see any evidence of shelling or anything like that, so your guess is as good as ours as to why the jeep decided to roll over on its side in the first place. 

Hawkeye was due back from the 8063rd where he went down to help out because two of their surgeons came down with the flu, along with about half of  their nurses. Miraculously, we haven’t had any flu problems out here in the 4077th, but maybe we’re next in line. Whatever the case may be, Hawk’s jeep crashed on his way back and according to Radar and Hawkeye’s ramblings, a nice Korean family kept an eye on him for the better part of the day and sent one of their daughters to our camp to go collect him.

We took pictures the second Radar came in with Hawkeye, and even in his own state of being concussed, he had managed to diagnose himself with the right thing without any of our imaging. We merely confirmed what he had already announced: a skull fracture just behind his ear, on the fissure between his right parietal and temporal bones. I’d say it’s a minor fracture, but the skin is broken, and you know as well as I do that there’s really no such thing as a minor skull fracture. 

He’d been mostly alert and somewhat been able to follow conversations, but you never know with Hawkeye. Even on a good day, where he has zero skull fractures, his mind runs faster than the rest of ours. Jumping between thoughts has never been much of an anomaly, but I’ll be the first to say that it’s worse than normal.

But, I digress. He’s resting now, actually sleeping, and we’re all going to keep an eye on him. I’m writing this in the mid evening, and I don’t get off until 2200. Regardless, I’m going to spend the rest of the night in post-op to make sure that nothing happens during the night. We’ve already started him on saline and penicillin; saline for rehydration, and penicillin because nobody here wants to chance a skull fracture becoming infected. The phrase “preventive medicine” comes to mind, but I doubt any doctor but myself is thinking about that in Korea. 

You’re probably going to be getting another letter from Hawkeye when he wakes up. I don’t think he’s going to remember much of this past day, let alone the hour before finally falling asleep and the mumbling of words as he tried to get through a letter to you. He’s also going to probably downplay his injuries when he writes to you, which is another reason why I felt the need to take over this letter. 

I’m not sure if Hawkeye’s told you anything about me, but I have a daughter out by San Francisco, nearly 10 thousand miles away, and if anything had happened to her, I know that I’d want to know immediately, and with all the details. It might be different seeing as how Erin, that’s my girl, is only a few months old and Hawkeye is pushing 31, but I’m not convinced. This might be the naivety of a new parent coming through, but I get the feeling that no matter how old they get, you never stop worrying. 

I suppose I should reiterate it again: Hawkeye is going to be okay, and we’re all keeping an eye on him, even Margaret. Don’t tell anyone I said this, but I think she truly cares about Hawkeye. He’s an easy person to care about. Almost too easy to worry about, some days. 

If anything else happens, I’ll get Radar to place a call to you so you don’t have to wait for these letters. I suppose if that’s going to happen, you’ll have already known about it, seeing as how postage delay is up to about two weeks out here. 

I think Hawkeye’s rambling might be rubbing off on me, and there’s really no other updates I can get at this time, so I’ll end it here and get this letter sent first class. 

Signed,

BJ Hunnicutt

Previous | Next

[bizlybebo]

hey so i am also batshit insane and not at all normal about Doug Bizlychannel Jerwee and his relationship with summer and i also have a non jrwi friend who is obsessed with Doug and deeply upset at the lack of doug content in the fandom so i am humbly requesting any and all doug ramblings u have in ur brain

HEEELLLLOOOOOOOO HIIHHIIHJ oh i hate that guy soooo muchh<33333

doug is absolutely bisexual and likely Some Form of non-cis but in s1 he had an evil villain job so he didn’t really care. he still doesn’t know .but like. summer is a pride flag sticker sapphic n she has the trans pin on her backpack n everything and so she kind of caught the Vibes on doug and Knows but hasn’t said anything.

hold on the rest of these got kinda Long let me make a cut

doug has a little brother right. he absolutelyyyy used to be one of those older brothers who was soo protective of his sibling and attached at the hip to him until a certain point where he started working for overlord n pushed his brother faaar away to keep his secret, being inferno, under wraps. so his little brother became kind of willing to let Anything slide as long as he could stick to his side like little brothers do,, and he probably Knew something was off and never mentioned it. it was definitely one of those situations hwere he probably thought doug was a hero/vigilante and not a villain.

ALSO i think this is actually said/kinda implied in canon but that summer probably kicked his ass to bring him down during the timeskip (or whenever they started working together). he was probably getting into shit he shouldn’t have and despite her not having powers at the time she still managed to absolutely cook him (cause like. there’s a different between who is technically physically stronger and who would Win A Fight. yknow). liiike i think it happened to be that kind of thing where they were in the middle of an absolute brawl n summer was just refusing to give up and they were exchanging banter/jabs due to already knowing each other somewhat from rockfall high. and right before they went back to exchanging deadly blows the prime rifters just fucking Showed Up. and summer was immediately curious and decided not to let doug get away on the grounds that “they’d finish the fight later” but then everything happened. yk.

ALSO i don’t think bizly actually said it but doug absolutely sacrificed himself for summer against that crazy scientist dude right. like we all saw it that way right. she was dying and he was in agony and likely thought he was dying to and so he decided that for once he was gonna be a good person even if it killed him and let summer take the fuckjn. synthetic skin and superpowers. but he survived anyways and it’s kind of like. that whole thing about “i expected to sacrifice myself for you, for it to all blow up in my face and for me to go with it, for me to be gone. but i survived and now you have to watch me pick up the shards of my life”. but summer “just because it’s rotten work doesn’t mean you don’t deserve it” dileo is like No Actually we are picking these fragments up Together but i am going to Kick Your Ass into being a good person All The Time. goddd does this make any sense i miss tjem so bad…..

also just how summer thinks she’s the only one who Knows about doug being Probably Bisexual But He Has A Job,, i think summer thinks she’s subtle abt her body dysmorphia from the whole superpowers thing. and i think doug realizes what’s going on so he makes fun of her for like. everything else But her appearance (other than joking about her always dying her hair). and he does the subtle things you always do when you’re trying to get it through somebody’s head that they’re beautiful and shouldnt be insecure (in a /p way).

also summer absolutely has dyed doug’s hair a couple times. he’s probably currently rocking w a few red streaks, but sometimes he’ll let summer do blue ones if he’s feeling quirky.

ALSO i’m on my suntrip bullshit i think summer was also trying to fucking track cantrip down during s2 and get her to Stop being a villain (enemies to lovers toxic yuri) but cantrip was wayyyyy more slippery than doug was. however after the incident w the scientist when doug was likely dying, summer had No fucking clue who to go to and. idk if i personally hc this but i think it would be Cool if she found cantrip and was like “hey. no fighting i promise. i seriously need your help can you do this for me. i’ll never bother you again if you can just help me with this”. and summer + prime rifters struck a tentative deal with cantrip + xavier and maybe alan to help doug Survive. does this make any sense sorru i love the pd npcs sooo much. i never stop thinking abt them

[smokestarrules]

hi! i wanted to ask u a question abt gwitch if that’s okay. during That episode 17, before miorine does the cruel/idiotic betrayal breakup she tells guel that she’s the same as him and also doesn’t want to lose her precious things. obviously she meant suletta but i was always confused, bc she’s still going thru with the backstabbing and pushing her away so she IS losing her precious thing unlike guel who with this deal is preserving his precious thing which is jeturk company by partnering w her. so they’re not the same in that sense OR did she mean 2 other ways: that she doesn’t want to lose the precious suletta she knows and loves to prospera’s manipulations that’ll turn her into a murderer, or that she means it like suletta will surely die on this path if it continues and she doesn’t want to lose her literally.

sorry this got long but i’m v curious how u interpreted that, like she said that and then goes and gives up her precious thing- unless it was the latter reasons i mentioned. also i’m realizing now it sounds like i hate miorine, i don’t, i get what she did and im nuetral/like her character but i never got the catharsis and resolution from that act bc of the rushed ending, and now i have this unresolved frustration and anger towards her that pops up sometimes when i think abt the 2nd cour.

i rly rly wish they’d gotten to talk abt this more during their reunion than just the one line “pulling u away from ur mom, it was all a mistake” like i desperately needed the words im sorry. i KNOW she probably said it offscreen but maaaan, i know u like this trope but break your heart to save them gets under my skin so badly i just want to shake the character!

this got long again i’m so sorry for the rambling, like i said i’ve got baggage from ep17 that imo didn’t pay off well enough to justify doing that. i still ship sulemio tho and am so happy they’re married, it just breaks my heart that we didn’t get more episodes to unpack that miorine acted exactly like her father. have a good day! thanks for reading all this if u did

To me it was both of the reasons you yourself mentioned: Miorine weighed her options, and ultimately decided that Suletta would be worse off if she didn't cut ties with her in the worst possible way. As a result, Suletta would be taken out of the most dangerous areas (re: Prospera also giving her up, as was the deal) and she wouldn't be further corrupted by Prospera either.

There just really wasn't any good decision to make. I love that episode because I think it's incredibly good character development for Miorine to be able to make that choice; she's always been somewhat of a selfish character and that's been shown alongside her protection of Suletta, so obviously this is a huge decision for her no matter what.

I would have also loved to see an apology, but unfortunately it's pretty clear that the tail end of the show was pretty rushed and while the scene we did get of their reunion was done incredibly well, there's a few things that they simply ran out of time for. In the end, I think I would have loved a true season 2 where they could flesh everything out more slowly and thoroughly, but I am happy with what we were ultimately given. You are absolutely valid to have some misgivings about how it all went down.

[chiricat]

another ramble about art again so i’m hiding it all under a ‘keep reading’ thingy so as to not clog ur feeds :]

aka thoughts about imposter syndrome, fanart, and what it means to draw stuff loosely disguised as a ‘ramble’. maybe a bit of akito almost-kinnie-isms (and probably ena) in there too because why not. also sorry this gets a lot less coherent as it goes on (i lost my train of thought near the end. it’ll come back someday)

i want to keep getting better. i want to keep growing and improving, so that i can convey the ideas in my head to others. i’m afraid to stagnate for too long, because what if it means i’ve hit my limit? what if i’ll never get better than i am right now? an irrational thought, really, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. hell, i felt like i hadn’t improved all that much from a year ago, when i tried to redraw a few of my older posts.

part of this stems from the question ‘how do people see my art? what kind of artist am i to them?’ which comes from when i got into fanart and fandom spaces, a long time ago. i would categorize the people i looked up to, my idols, my role models. there was the one that made comics that felt like home with your friends, and there was the one that made pieces that felt like i was sitting in a café in the middle of a busy city, and there was the one that made renders that felt like i was looking at liquid gold. i was fascinated by the effects of all these different artstyles, and decided that i wanted to do the same. i wanted to make art that made people feel at home, like a fic that you keep coming back to, or art that conveyed how i felt well enough that others felt the same way, or could understand it at the very least. 

naturally, as i continued to draw and admire these artists from afar, i wondered why exactly their art appealed to me. at first, the answer was simple: i like looking at it. but that wasn’t good enough - what about the things i didn’t really care to look at, then? what made this piece any different?

so i tried to understand, why i liked something, or why others liked something. after studying art for a little (yay classes) i understood more, i understood why those artists made the choices they did. for one, it was their powerful composition, and how they wanted to pull the viewer in with the characters. for another, it was their color palettes, which were always balanced yet strong and guaranteed to catch your eye because of it. other times, it would be the lighting, angled to present the characters in such a way that it made you feel like you were there too, or linework that made you feel just how much the artist cherished the characters. there were other, less technical things too, but i was trying to build a foundation before diving into things that were harder to learn.

in short, there was so, so much more to everything than i had realized as a kid.

so i asked myself the same question. why do people like my art? why is my art appealing and worthy of your time? and where did i fit in, if i were to categorize myself? 

these questions got a little worse. incredibly irrational. imposter syndrome was kicking in when i saw that more people were liking my art, especially when i compared it to myself from a year ago. or when my favorite artists were following me back. (it was weird, somewhat. i had always seen them as worlds away from my own space, artists that i had admired from afar and thus never believed that they would turn around and see me.)

‘do people actually like my art? is my art actually worth anyone’s time?’ i wonder. ‘do i deserve these nice comments, or even these likes?’ 

‘am i even getting better at all?’

these are a bit foolish of me to think. it shouldn’t matter, really. as long as i’m enjoying drawing and having a fun time, then why should it matter whether others like it or not? i don’t have to be doing my best, giving it 110% all the time, i’m allowed to make goofy art or self-indulgent art. this is my motto, for the most part. as long as you’re enjoying the craft, then it’s worth it.

but with the goal of improvement, i don’t always want to stay in my comfort zone. i want to keep pushing my limits, even if its just a little at a time, so i can make something impressive, something that really resonates as much as i want it to, as much as certain pieces resonated with me when i was younger. the same way that i kept coming back to certain pieces (and still do), i want to be able to do that too. i don’t want to feel like a kid playing at an adult’s game, like someone who doesn’t know what they’re doing and it shows.

it’s a tricky balance. i’m not sure if i’ll ever truly feel like i’ve ‘finally done it’. i think that most artists are never truly content with their work as a whole, anyways, and that’s okay. that’s something i should be more okay with. i can make art just for fun, and i can also make art with the intent of solely improving or practicing. i can even combine the two, and most of the time, i try to anyways.

(sorry, i lost my train of thought after writing the last few paragraphs... i dunno where i wanted to go with this exactly HHH.

tldr; i’m always stuck between ‘i’m happy making this art even if its bad’ and ‘i need to get better and leave people in awe to feel like i deserve the love and nice comments i receive’.

if you somehow managed to get to the end of this, ty for reading, even if it was a hot dumpster fire LMAO)

[cherubchoirs]

Yo :3

So uh, I’ve been looking through your art and I am absolutely in love with it. I love your use of colors and lineart (ESPECIALLY v1 but I’ll get to them). This will mostly just be me rambling about it cause :]

Dude how the fuck do you get emotion so well done. V1 is immaculate, like look at this shit

You can feel that it’s alien to non robots, but is genuinely curious. I absolutely love how you draw poses. Especially since the characters don’t have faces, body language is key. They feel like they have a personality with each drawing. Always hunched down and extended with no regards to social norms. The attention to detail is what really makes it, the thicker outlines on the character make them pop more, and your take on V1 is clearly thought out well, along with your ultrakill characters.

LIKE LOOK AT IT‼️

IT GENUINELY LOOKS 3D‼️‼️

While my favorite is v1, Micheal in your aus is especially well written and drawn. His design reminds me a lot of the corpse of king Minos / Minos prime. which I like! It highlights their contrast, how Minos tried to reason with a higher being on an equal level. Micheal acted instead, deeming himself unworthy of said higher being. Both genuinely cared for their citizens, both were royalty. Minos spoke out, Micheal stayed isolated, which only further deteriorated him, unlike Minos, who instead was proactive, reaching out to other layers and kings like Sisyphus. Sometimes you need to know what it’s like to feel consequence in order to succeed. But in the end, both of their bodies are left to rot, unable to succeed.

Also I really like this one of v1. Their silhouette is distinctive and you’re good at posing :3

Sry. Idk if this is weird or creepy, but I thought I’d share my thoughts with you since I like analyzing stuff.

THE WAY THIS MADE ME SO EMOTIONAL THO....WTF THANK YOU SO MUCH......it's absolutely mind-blowing to me that you pay attention to these little details because i absolutely try to add all of these things intentionally, but i find myself thinking like 'will anyone even care??? about these tiny things???' so it means more than i can say to see that someone does!!!!! like i'm so happy to know that my characterization of v1 comes through, because i really do have a very clear idea in my mind of its behavior and personality that i'm trying to convey through still images. v1's movements are bird/raptor-like and while i give it a very sophisticated, sentient mind, its intelligence is nonhuman and it is a being that absolutely doesn't conform to our standards. v1 is something new, and i want it to be something that clearly has an internal life and a bright mind, yet exhibits very little corresponding human behaviors. plus, it's a bit odd because of its somewhat corrupted software, and so i wanted too for its little hunched posture to show it's sort of a machine gone feral (in the traditional, once was domesticated but is now on its own sense lol) - it was made with a humanoid body shape and so SHOULD stand up straight, but it doesn't anymore. because it doesn't want to. and so!!! i really do draw v1 with a LOT of intention and i put plenty of thought into posing it correctly to both convey its character and its emotion in the piece...and since it's my favorite, i'm so glad i'm doing it justice!!

AND YEA!!! michael definitely has parallels to minos (which i started to think on when i realized their head shape is....kinda similar lol i swear i was just going for crown + blindfold for mike's helmet but oops!!) and i do like their throughlines as fallen rulers, plus their sort of opposing yet ultimately disastrous relationships to their own corpse - minos is separated from his and must watch as it mindlessly tears his city apart while michael is trapped in a flesh prison of his own body, forced to stay within it as it rots away. they are two rulers that would have done anything for their people, and yet both failed them despite again taking opposite paths. minos really had no hope, the external forces of heaven coming down on him in their full authority, though he will forever blame himself. michael departed despite, with god's disappearance, being essentially the highest in heaven - he believed only god could save them though, that he could never become a king from a prince (again, due to heaven's own hierarchy). their meeting would be nothing but utter disaster, but it does make me consider their interactions a little more closely when michael decides to test minos prime's strength (because while michael would have a lot to say about how minos failed his people by defying god, minos would have much to say in turn about a prince abandoning his people at their weakest)

BUT FOR REAL....this message was so amazingly kind and i want to thank you again for sending it my way. it just made me!!!! feel so happy to see that my art is loved and that the work i put into it really means something. honestly it's the best thing i could ask for <3

[astriar]

Would you like to ramble about your DCA headcanons to us, the audience ?

!! My first ask! Thank you so much! And DUHHH OF COURSE I love talking about the sillies!!!

okay so I have a lot of headcanons that stem from me either willfully ignoring canon or misunderstanding it, but hey fnaf lore is my kinetic sand and I am a child of the early 2000s so let’s go:

—Sun and Moon were good at their job before the virus infected them! I know this is now somewhat backed up by Ruin, with Cassie saying that she always had a good time in the daycare, but I feel like it’s nice to mention!

—Sun was as overwhelming as he was in SB because he was infected with the Virus along with Moon! Normally, he acts a lot more like you would expect a childcare animatronic to act like (again, somewhat backed up by HW2 as Sun speaks a lot more calmly! My little asshole <33)

—On the train of thought as above, here is my own personal interpretation of events that led up to SB: Moon was the first in the Pizzaplex to be infected, and after he realized as such, he blocked himself entirely out of the system and put firewalls up to hell and back, cutting off his communication with Sun!

—Sun started going a little crazy with the stress of keeping up the daycare entirely by himself, and didn’t notice the virus had infected him too until too late! (Basically right before the events of security breach)

—Moon would listen to and enjoy old Panic at the Disco if he had access to non fazbear-approved music

—…night shift employees also happen to find their devices go missing on occasion, only to be returned with some interesting Spotify history

—a lot of people I feel like think Sun would listen to soft indie stuff but I think he would either listen to hard rock or the most deplorable, insufferable hyper-pop on the damn market

—Moon and the DJ are besties!

—Sun can’t leave the daycare, but Chica will come and visit him every once in awhile! Sun gives her his latest knitting project, and Chica usually delivers gossip from across the Pizzaplex Moon happened to miss.

—The rest of the band members steer clear of the daycare, except for Freddy every one in awhile. And Bonnie, of course— Moon was friends with Bonnie.

—Also, non-virus infected Moon is a menace who is generally rude and disrespectful to Pizzaplex employees (smh moon) UNLESS you give him a reason to not be rude and disrespectful

—he operates on an guilty until proven innocent basis and Sun is absolutely the same way with Pizzaplex employees

—Moon is the more public menace, but everyone really should be afraid of Sun, who 100% has less morals

—I don’t even know what to make of canon Eclipse but I love them!! And I genuinely wonder if Sun and Moon were ever rebooted into safe mode before Ruin? If so, what kind of role did Eclipse play?

-I also don’t know what to make of Moon’s apparent lore relevance in HW2, and this may be denial speaking, but I feel like maybe Moon wasn’t infected during HW2? Maybe he’s just being his normal, menace-y self? That’s what I think at least but that’s just a theory (a GAME THEORY)

-Jack-O-Moon :D <3

….kay this feels like way too many words BUT I appreciate the chance to ramble!! I definitely try and keep their personalities based in canon (especially in my writing) but I also love everyone who hc’s them heavily!! The fandom is what makes liking these two so enjoyable, so I love seeing any and all takes :D

I sincerely apologize if the formatting is weird (mobile baybee) but! Thank you very much for asking :D

[littlemissnobody124]

Sunlight

Part 2

Pairing: Chris Evans x Black Reader

Words: ~2k

Warnings: age gap, slow burn romance, I think 18+ in later chapters but for now it’s just storytelling, somewhat dark, mentions/implied death

A/N: hi, this is the next part of my writing fic, I have finally decided to post the next part so I hope you enjoy this part as well :) *if you wanna be added to/removed from my taglist ask me and I’ll add/remove you with no worries at all*

While he was away, all I did, well all I could do was take in my surroundings, and how big this whole space truly was. Seeing the huge bed, all I wanted to do was lay down as it looked as soft as I thought it could be. But seeing a door cracked open a bit, I took a chance to see what could be in there. Walking in I saw how vast the bathroom truly was, a toilet with its seat carved with flowers on top, a counter with two sinks, two mirrors each on the wall on top of a sink, and a beautiful porcelain tub by the biggest window with sheer curtains covering as much as it could. But seeing the sun from a better viewpoint this time.

All I wanted to do was bask in its sunlight for however long. But sadly only could for a few moments before a long knocking came from within the room. Made me rush out to see who it was.

Before I could answer, the door opened itself. Standing before me was a man in armor, a sword at his waistband. Guessing it was Chris’ best guard, I was about to greet him before I saw how discontent he was by his face.

“I am here to guard your room until Sir Evans comes back, but until then I don’t want to see anything with your dangerous magic. I don’t want to watch over you but at his highness’ request I must. I am not his right hand as he wanted to stay with Sir Evans but I’m his second best. Now, this is your maid who is assigned to you,” he stated before walking back out into the hallway and slamming the doors behind him.

Earning a flinch out of me and no need to worry him. As I am powerless as I hadn’t been fed in so long and had not been in the sun either for so long and for barely a few minutes so he didn’t need to worry too much about me.

The maid, just a few inches taller than me, bowed toward me. Fearing she'll be like the guard and the maid from earlier, I began to move out of her way and ready myself for whatever words were to come. Until I felt hands holding my own. Turning to look at her, all I could see was the awe on her face.

“Your eyes,” she beamed, “they’re like the night sky, and magic all at the same time.” She was awestruck at how my eyes looked. It feels so long since I’ve had anyone so intrigued by how I looked except Chris.

“I’m so sorry for getting ahead of myself but I couldn’t help being able to finally be in your presence,” she rambled on, “all most of the maids could talk about how ’scary’ you are but how they described you I couldn’t imagine how scary you could be at all as you sounded so mystical and beautiful and you are but ten times more than what I imagined. I just couldn’t give you justice on what I believed you looked like.”

She gushed on until realizing she needed to get you dressed for the day ahead.

“Ah, I’m sorry once again your highness. I need to start getting you ready to see the new king,” she began before sitting me on the bed. Then running to the bathroom to ready the bath, and then ran back in to lay out the dress she planned for me to wear out.

After getting done, she ran out of the bathroom and slowly walked over to me. Gently taking my hand and guiding me to the full tub, allowing me to test the water with my hand before getting in.

“I hope you like it, miss,” she spoke to me softly. I thanked her before getting undressed and stepping in.

It felt so peculiar as I looked towards the ceiling this time seeing the art painted over my head I didn’t see before and couldn’t appreciate like I did when I first took a look around the room. Feeling such warmth from two people after my captivity slowly made me feel the warmth and affection run all over me.

The prick of tears coming from my eyes from the overwhelming feeling of my emotions not wanting to be seen by my maid I put my head underwater. Imagining I’m within the ocean like I was what felt like a millennium. Staying for a minute or more until I’m ready to come back out.

Coming out I felt the water falling from my face and my matted hair which once curled in front of my eyes until I heard both doors open from the room. The swift yet heavy steps came towards the bathroom. Once in front of the bathroom door, the figure slowly opened the door as I moved the hair from my face. And in he came.

I felt relief wash over my body as he came over me kneeling in front of the tub. I couldn’t tell what was in his eyes this time. He looked over to the maid and then back to me. I could tell I wanted to go back underneath the water once again by how he looked at me. All I could do was look toward the water instead.

“Who upset you and what did they say?,” he asked me as I felt his hand lift my face. He read me like I did every time I saw him and I just leaned in towards his hand before I found my words.

“No one,…sire,” I softly voiced to both of us knowing it was a lie that I uttered.

“No, I’m going to ask once again. Please answer truthfully this time, who upset you, and what did they say?” he urged me to tell him.

Compelled to say it this time, “as long as no one gets hurt,” I began taking a deep breath and swallowing before I went on, “your second-best guard, it wasn’t anything bad as I’ve heard worse from folks, I assure you.”

Taking his hand from my cheek, held it with both hands, and leaned my forehead to his knuckles, squeezing my eyes shut to show him my sincerity.

“I’ll take that as your answer. Now hurry with your bath and come down to the dining room. I'll be waiting for you,” he says to me as if we’re the only people here. He starts getting up, I realized I saw another figure in the room watching our interaction.

About as tall as him, dressed in armor as the guard outside the room, but with dirty blonde hair falling almost into his eyesight. I saw similarities between the guard and him, except for the eyepatch on his left eye and a scar that extends outside of it.

“Before I go, I will not harm the man who said what he said to you but I will still punish him,” beginning to take a breath before continuing, “don’t call me ‘sire’ again, only call me by my name that’s all I wish from you.” he ends taking a look back at me and walking on. His right-hand man bowed towards the maid and me before leaving with him and closing the door slowly.

Right before my maid spoke, all we heard was a shout, a short scuffle of feet, and then quiet once again.

“Would you like me to wash you?,” she asked me and I nodded her way. Before she rambled. I smiled to myself as I listened to her.

——————————————————————

Before long, I was already dressed. As she never took care of curls before all we could agree on was a sad matted bun.

Right as she stated it was time for us to go I had a nagging feeling to ask her something.

“May I ask your name?,” I stumbled out of my mouth, “I mean…I didn’t ask beforehand I feel it’s impolite that I hadn’t. As I wish to address you by your name and not what other royal ladies would say to you.” Feeling heat coming to my cheeks knowing they’re darkening before her.

“Alice, Alice Hartman. Thank you for asking as no one has ever really asked me this before.,” she told me. Seeing her eyes watering, I slowly wiped her eyes as gently as I could with the handkerchief I had grabbed from the vanity in the room.

We took a short breather so Alice could calm herself before we left for the dining hall. Opening the door to the room, there stood Chris’s second-hand guard seemingly exhausted and a bit roughed up but not quite hurt. He bowed as we walked out and closed the door.

You could see he was unwilling but it was better than what it was before. I nodded his way and then followed Alice to the dining hall.

On the way there I saw the garden again. All I could feel was longing to stay there and be in the garden as I could tell it felt freeing being just in its presence. But on we went passing by other maids, some who were cowering in fear and others who looked disgusted. Yet one or two like Alice appeared who looked on in wonder as if telling me they were fascinated by just me and all I could do was smile before we finally arrived at the dining hall.

I could tell we were close as the hall became more extravagant and I saw the doors almost five times my size that seemed like we were to go in there but instead we took a right and went into a room that was bigger than what I thought from just the doors as they were smaller from the ones we just bypassed moments ago.

Strolling in, there was a table as long as the room with multiple chairs but two big ones at each end. I thought I had to sit at one of them as I saw him at the one on the other side. Walking towards the chair, I saw him get up as well and walk towards me and Alice guided me towards him instead.

I begrudgingly walked over to the seat closest to him and sat there.

Telling as I was upset, he asked me, “What’s wrong, sweet pea?” All I could do was look at the seat.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now sitting in my glorious big seat, I felt accomplished. I still sat next to him but at least I was in the biggest seat in the room.

He could tell I was satisfied with the way I was beaming with smiles and ready to dig into whatever food was prepared for us.

The chefs wheeled in the food and set the table for us. It was revealed to be a braised roast with a buttered baked potato along with some garnish on top and wine for both of us.

I ate everything on my plate, it was delicious. Now it’s been a while since I had wine or anything with alcohol in it so I got tipsy off of it fast.

Before I knew it, it was dark already. Instead of being walked back to my room, I was carried back from what I remembered.

Then, I was in my bed which seemed to take me to sleep as I was laid down. I felt my hand brought in his rough one, and the deep kiss on my knuckles as he murmured something I couldn’t catch to himself.

He got up and was to leave the room but he turned back and saw a face that darkened and got close to me. Afterward, I dreamt, but I don’t remember much of what it was. But it was brighter and sweeter than any dream I had had beforehand. As every dream I had was just darkness.

I knew I was finally free just from my dreams alone.

——————————————————————

Taglist: @cherienymphe @geminixevans-stan @afriendlyblackhottie @sunshinebuckybarnes @honeystevie @syntheticavenger @flawlessglamazon @ramp-it-up @maroonsunrise83 @ysmmsy @starryevermore @sapphirescrolls @punani @olyvoyl @p---ink @avintagekiss24 @fineanddandy @harryspet @cockslutpadalecki @canumoveurseatup-no @nagisaunicorn-blog @ilovefandoms102 @boxofbonesfic @mianorth @raewritesfiction @stargirlfics @georgiapeach30513

[bigjimbopickens]

For me personally, I won't be watching Kevin's stuff for a while to come. It is less about him though and more about the community he's brought to him, a community that now thinks he is one of them. A community that will likely stick around now as well. I don't remember reading anything in his apology regarding the vitriol he allowed to spread (though turning the comments off was the right thing to do), and I'm still soured by the lack of response to you regarding the p*** claims.

In any case I'm heavily disappointed. I love Kevin. He's the only YouTuber I have any merch from. And while I saw this coming I'm anguished. It sucks.

- also an autistic trans man

When I said I wouldn’t talk about this anymore I lied I wanna respond to this. I am contributing more to the convo with this though.

I feel the same way as I’m sure many others do too. And I’m glad you brought up the previous bs that happened just 2 or so months prior to all this because I was going to but felt like it wasn’t necessary as the post was already long enough.

For those unaware, in November 2022 Kevin posted a sims 4 video where he recreated the original sims 4 cult, which the fandom mimicked in a way. He changed the rules in that one to ban werewolves, which was interpreted as “ban furries.”

I made a joke response to it using the fursuit I made of werewolf Jim Pickens and people took it wayyyy too seriously. I was harassed quite a bit for that because people take what Kevin says too seriously. And of course I was called a p*do over it too. That situation scared off a-lot of people from the community but my naive self thought that was as bad as it gets and wanted to fix it. I believed it was my fault. So I organized a raid to bring the positivity back and it worked. Until Kevin fucked it up again 2 months later. I’m not organizing another. I’m not fixing his community again, he broke it and I had no involvement this time.

I sorta let that one slide when really I shouldn’t have because it was just one user who was really causing an issue for me. And it also wasn’t Kevin’s fault that guy had issues. I heard that Kevin did vaguely mention it on stream but I didn’t catch it because I was flying that day. Coincidentally he did post his “I almost quit in 2022” video on the day of the raid, which I came across again and said half-jokingly “You should’ve.”

There is another situation similar that happened to me back in April 2021 that is somewhat related as well. It was during the first NoPixel stream when I did fanart of Grognak and people started getting mad over their pronouns in my replies. So out of spite me and another artist drew them with the non binary pride flag and people became horribly transphobic towards us. Other artists joined us and the mods banned whoever was being transphobic in the replies. So transphobia has always been an issue in the community unfortunately, I just didn’t realize it was that fucking bad.

I joined the community shortly after the pandemic started when the Tomodachi Life series had started and I wish we could go back to those days. It was so much fun. Kevin never does videos anymore about his characters and when he does they’re more challenge-based rather than lore/character focused. That’s a big reason why his sims series fell off so hard. Jim went from being this evil idiot yet genius cult leader to asexually reproducing 100 babies. With the last sims 4 video being one that started a fight in his community I have no idea how he’s going to continue it. I don’t even know if he’s aware of what happened to me. I know he saw the fursuit, he liked the tweet I made about it.

Oh man another long post. Damn I ramble a lot. But I think it needs to be said regardless. I have got to be the user of the community who got fucked over the most amount of times simply for existing haha. I am the embodiment of what the community seems to hate. Thankfully two other communities have already welcomed me so I don’t have to rely on this one as much anymore. I’m still thankful for all the good it’s done for me but I’ve never been in a fandom more toxic than the Call Me Kevin community.

I hope you’re also doing well, anonymous stranger.

[plural-culture-is]

Hi! I saw that you answer questioning systems and all that, so I hope this is ok and sorry if it gets long, if it’s too long/don’t feel like answering questions/giving an opinion, feel free to ignore this.

I’ve bee wondering if I’m a system or not for a little while now. It feels as if my brain is trying to convince me that I am in the sense that each time something about systems come up I feel attracted to it (sorry if the wording isn’t the best, it’s hard to put it into words), like it feels as if something is pushing me to find the answer to “am I a system?” But after doing research a lot of research on DID/OSDD spaces and reading about the experience that will just go away and I’ll be convinced with 100% certainty that I’m not a system.

Also, when that urge to do research hits me, it feels as if I’m trying to confirm it more than anything, but the urge is all that keeps me going into the research bc it doesn’t seem as if I’m a system. I’m don’t think I communicate or hear anyone else in my head, but then again for all I know I could just be unable to differentiate my own inner monologue and other’s, because I don’t know how normal it is to be full on insulting another part of yourself in your head and that other part cursing you back (in a teasing way, not like mean way).

I know I struggle with dissociation and I’ve only discovered this somewhat recently bc I never realized it wasn’t normal, but it usually tends to stick to derealization and depersonalization, I have little to no moments of amnesia, at least that I’m aware of. I tend to dissociate more when I research systems.

I’m just confused, I don’t know if my brain pushing the thought of maybe being a system means anything or not bc the only other mental disorder/disability that my brain ever pushed (autism) was right in the end. I think if I may be part of a system, it might be a OSDD-1a, but I’m really unsure bc I feel like there’s a big lack of a lot of things. Anyway, what do you think and do you have any resources that you could recommend to continue my research or maybe tips on what to look out?

(I hope this makes sense and isn’t too rambly)

sorry, this ask has been our inbox too long and we haven't been able to come up with a response, so we're handing it off to the public to answer

[valentinesweetheartspecial]

hi vincent u shd tell us more abt haruka n shu's dynamic i love toxic codependency btw

HELLO LAB!!! I am so happy you asked because I am obsessed with them. I will put this under a read more ….it got long

To explain why I think they should have a fucked up toxic relationship I should explain a bit about them individually. My Haruka post can be found here but to summarize some important points: Haruka has a fucked up relationship with his brother Kanata, who ostracizes him from anyone he meets. He thinks of himself as a corrupted human, an “egoist” who was once his brother’s hero and wanted to help others, and now has no hope of going back to how the way things used to be. Shu is an abandoned child who’s never been shown even a speck of love by his parents or those who have been assigned to take care of him. The one person who saw a spark of light in Shu instilled false hope for his father’s love inside of him, and accidentally turned him into a bitter kid who hates adults.

Shu and Haruka are the vocalists of Epsilon, which is actually the only band to even have two vocalists who consistently sing together. Pre-epsilon story 6.5, Haruka doesn’t endorse Shu’s shitty behavior but doesn’t shut it down either. Shu uses Haruka as he does anyone else and finds him entertaining to observe. Both of them are pessimists who use music to make themselves known, to be seen— Haruka, to his peers, Shu, to his father, and both of them to the world. Haruka realizes this before Shu does, in Epsilon band story Chapter 6 Episode 5: aka vincent insanity chapter. I will just put some screenshots here of the chapter because i don’t wanna summarize them

This chapter completely changes their dynamic— it opens up a door to a whole new world of understanding between them. Now, they have no choice but to be at least somewhat involved in each other’s decisions. In this chapter, Haruka openly declares that he needs Shu to keep his dream alive, because he knows that they both know that music is all they have to get themselves known. They can’t just ignore each other anymore with this information. If they do, it adds a whole new layer of questioning— are they uncomfortable around each other, regretful about that sudden vulnerability, etc ? So, that’s all been established.

What Shu needs is a supportive, probably older brother or father type figure who can show him love and recognition, right? What Haruka needs is both a support system and someone to pull his head out of the ground and make him face reality, right ….? But like …imagine how much more fun it would be …if they fed off of each other like this ….my vision

I think that IF I WERE WRITING AASIDE. I would use this so much. I would love to see Haruka and Shu run off to stay in Tokyo and live this shut in lifestyle where Shu tries to write songs to sustain them and Haruka tries not to fuck up another relationship. Shu could absolutely fill that “younger brother I want to save” role for Haruka, and Haruka could absolutely fill that “First person to recognize me for who I am” role for Shu (except not really because they’re just using each other). Of course, though, I am not writing Aaside…with the recent development of Aoi being Shu’s brother and Reiji being much more kind than I expected (effectively creating a support system for Shu), this whole vision kind of goes down the drain, rip. But I like to think they’ll still go somewhere with Haruka and Shu’s newfound dynamic potential! Please god let Kimisute make them even more fucked up and depressed.

Thank you so much for this opportunity to ramble Lab….this is all kind of a lot of nothing and just restating facts but I enjoy it nonetheless. Here is Epsilon’s first song, isn’t the video so fun? I hope you enjoyed reading this ^o^

[starrysnowdrop]

Okay so like, this is a weird question but I kind of started to think about it, have you ever had characters where it feels like the npcs you shipped them with were like... soulmates? I hope that makes sense. I don't really know how else to explain my random thought.

Hmmmm, you mean like your OC and their NPC partner were soulmates? Absolutely!

The first time I experienced it was when my main OC was Yume, and I had at first shipped her with Aymeric, and I just couldn’t get it to work. They didn’t have the chemistry that I was hoping for, and I wanted to ship an OC with Aymeric because I love him so much, but in the end I just knew it wasn’t working and I scrapped the ship altogether.

Then I shipped Yume with Cid, and I thought they were cute and I thought I was happy with it, but I still didn’t have the feeling with them that I was looking for. They didn’t have that “spark” that made me excited about the ship, and I kept thinking of the idea that I had briefly thought of years prior and never did it because I ultimately thought I wasn’t a good enough writer for it to work. Eventually I got over my fear and decided to go for it. I had Yume break up with Cid and end their engagement so that she could be with G’raha.

To make a long story somewhat shorter, I’m so glad that I overcame my anxiety and decided to ship Yume with G’raha, because I just think they work so well together. They have that chemistry, that “spark” that I was looking for, but everyone that I had tried to ship with Yume before just didn’t work out as well as I had hoped. To me, they really feel like soulmates, to the point that I even ship Eurydice, Unsundered Yume, with G’raha’s Unsundered self, whom I call Orpheus. I can’t even think of anyone else ever being with her anymore. Nothing else feels right, you know?

As for Hali, it didn’t take me long to realize that Hali would have a thing for Aymeric, as it took only the cutscene introducing him to Hali that made me go “Yes! Aymeric didn’t work out for Yume, but maybe Hali will have a better chance!” And not long after that, I started writing the Hali x Aymeric ship and I haven’t looked back! For me, it’s so easy to write for them, they are so right for each other, and they really do have the biggest “spark” that I’ve seen in any of my ships that I’ve written for before. Once again, I can’t imagine Hali with anyone else now.

I’m not sure why exactly, because I don’t think it’s wrong if you’re the type of writer that can write multiple ships for the same OC, and I think some of my mutuals do it extremely well. But I don’t know, I just can’t do that with my OCs. I like to have that special person (or persons if you’re poly, though neither of my girls are) that’s right for them, and if that means that they have found their soulmates, then who am I to deny them that?

I have no idea if I actually answered your question correctly anon, but you did get me to ramble on a bit about it! Thank you so much for the really thoughtful ask!! 🥰💖

Addendum: I still feel a bit guilty that I had my eye on Krile to ship with Hali and it just didn’t happen. This is absolutely NOT me questioning my Hali x Aymeric ship, because I’m not giving them up for anything, but I still really want to have an OC to ship with Krile, and maybe I can work on that?? Ehhhh we shall see.