#i am technically going on a short road trip thing with my dad in a few weeks

[raspberrybluejeans]

i want to go on trips so fuckin bad but no one has both time and money including myself 😭

[ssa-babygirl]

Out of My League [Part 2]

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Single mom!Reader

Word count: 4.5k (ohohohoho i went OVERBOARD with the dialogue here I am sorry for all the useless exposition)

Summary: Most things have changed in the last 10 years, but it’s safe to say that a few things stayed exactly the same. Mixed POV

Warning(s): Mentions of past bullying, mentions of cheating, mentions of kidnapping, general criminal minds stuff, cursing, VERY VERY BRIEF MENTION of a miscarriage and leukemia like it’s one sentence and that’s all

Author’s Note: The moment yall have been waiting for! They grow up so fast!! I’m going on a quick trip this week and then heading back to school a few days later, so the next part may take a little longer, but I’m super excited to write it!!

[Previous Part] [Series Masterlist]

Las Vegas, Nevada, 2004

(Spencer’s POV)

My first case out on the field was not a pleasant one. Well, it rarely is, that’s what happens when you work for the FBI to catch serial killers. For the first couple of weeks at the BAU, I helped them consult on cases, but they weren’t sure I was ready to go out on the field with them. After I got my weapon certification, Gideon told me he wanted me to come along on the next case because I was familiar with the area. There had been a series of child abductions near Vegas, my hometown. I would have been much more nervous about traveling had I not been able to see my mom while I was there. I hadn’t visited her in a while and the guilt was gnawing at me.

The first day was brutal. Hotch made some of us go back to the hotel late at night, but it was hard for us to sleep. JJ hated working cases about children, so she went to have a quick drink at the hotel bar, where she promptly forgot her purse and had to call me from her room to go get it for her. I had no hope of getting any rest that night, so I figured I’d take a walk down the hall and try to clear my head. 

There was no sign of the purse at first glance, no small black clutch on the bar like JJ said. But there was a woman cleaning glasses behind the counter, maybe she knew where the purse was.

As I approached the bar, the woman’s features took a familiar shape and triggered a distant memory. Seeing her face again was like coming home after a long drive without a map, squinting through the dark and hoping the headlights would get brighter when finally, you’re pulling onto a road that you know by heart. 

I didn’t need to look at her nametag, I already knew who she was, but judging by her polite smile borne solely out of the courtesy required to work in the service industry, she didn’t recognize me. In her defense, I had grown about a foot and a half since the last time she saw me. And I got a freaking haircut. 

“Y-Y/N?” 

She looked up from her rags and scrunched up her face in confusion.

“Okay, so you definitely know me, and I am so sorry about this, but I can’t quite place it. You look so familiar, though, I just… I meet a lot of people with this job, I’m so sorry, I forgot your name.”

I grinned, she still had that same habit of apologizing every five seconds, “I don’t really have that problem, eidetic memory and all.”

Her eyes widened, “Spencer? Spencer Reid!”

I laughed and nodded.

“You’re so tall now! What has it been, like, 10 years? Oh my goodness, come here.” She awkwardly leaned over the bar and hugged me. She still used the same shampoo. 

“How ya been, kid?”

“I’m good! H-How are you?”

“Doing fine, thanks. What brings you back to good ol’ Sin City?”

“I’m here for work.”

“Oh, and what are you doing now?” She leaned on the counter and gazed up with curious eyes, “Helping the doctors at Area 51?”

Good to know she still had jokes, “No actually, I’m with the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI.”

“Woah, you’re a fed now?”

“Yeah, we’re investigating a series of--”

“Kidnappings. Yeah. Scary shit. Can I get you a drink?”

“No, I’m good.”

“You close to catching the guy?”

“Unfortunately, no.”

“Any of the kids turn up?”

“Unfortunately, yes. We found one boy this morning. He… didn’t make it.”

Her face dropped to a look of worry I hadn’t seen since she took off my blindfold that day on the football field, “Name. I need a name,” her voice grew hoarse.

“I can’t really disclose that information.”

“Spencer, please. Every day my kid comes home from school and asks me if I was watching the news.”

I couldn’t deny the way my heart sank at the news, but I could sure as hell ignore it, “Y-You have kids?”

“One. Little Jamie. His best friend, Robbie, is missing.” Robbie Carter, age five, he’s been missing for the past two weeks. He’s likely dead, but we still haven’t found him.

“Every time someone misses school he gets scared they got taken too. Baby Boy doesn’t understand flu season yet.”

“How old is he?” I had to get her mind off of this. I don’t want to worry her.

“Five. Just started kindergarten. Wanna see a picture?” Seems like I succeeded. 

“Sure.”

She whipped out her phone and pulled up a picture of Jamie on his first day of school, backpack far too big for his body. Y/N was posed next to him, the picture too small to show that she was crying ever so slightly.

“Adorable, right?”

I couldn’t stop the grin spreading across my face, “Cute kid. Looks just like you.”

She looked back at the photo and smiled softly, “Except the eyes. He’s got his dad’s eyes.”

I glanced down at her hand holding the phone and was greeted with a pleasant surprise, “I’m guessing Jamie’s dad isn’t in the picture?”

Offense flickered across her features for a second, her eyebrows twitching and lips pursing, “How’d you know?”

“No ring.”

“You do work for the FBI.”

“Would you mind telling me what happened?”

“You know, you’re supposed to be the one spilling your sorrows to the bartender, not the other way around.”

“You don’t have to tell me, just thought we could catch up, I haven’t seen you in ten years.”

She sighed, returning her phone to the front pocket in her apron, “Remember Kyle Brothers?”

“Oh, do I? Yeah, of course, I remember your high school boyfriend, Y/N. What tipped you off, the eidetic memory, or the fact he used to beat me up after gym class?” It was more like the intense rage and jealousy I had when they got back together after football season ended.

“God, see, I always knew he was an asshole, but it never seemed to faze me, I’m so sorry about that.”

“You did what you could. And you apologize too much.”

“Sor--”

She froze mid-word and made a face as she realized once again that she was about to apologize yet again. I stifled a chuckle, but she laughed and grabbed a rag from the counter to finish cleaning the glasses.

“So Kyle?”

“Yes, Kyle. We broke up again before college, I was going out of state and didn’t wanna do long distance, you know all that. I was in a really bad place during my senior year of college, so after graduation, I decided to move back home for a bit, spend some time with my mom--”

“How is she?”

“She’s great! Moved to D.C. with my dad a while back.”

“I should visit her, Quantico isn’t far.” 

She returned a genuine smile, “She would love that.”

“Sorry I interrupted you, keep going.”

“You’re fine. Long story short, moving back home for a few months turned into having a one night stand with my ex. Which turned into us getting engaged nine months later while I’m exhausted and holding my son.”

“Well, that’s a fun birth story for Jamie.”

“Yeah, ‘Happy Birthday, sweetie, your father proposed to me while you were, like, an hour old and then cheated on me six months later.”

“Seriously?”

“Yep.” She popped the p, “Came home and heard two things: Jamie fussing in his sleep from the playpen and bedsprings squeaking in our room.”

“I’m guessing that you guys were done for good after that?”

“Nice detective work.”

“Technically, I’m a profiler, not a detective, as they typically work in local police departments and I work for the federal government, not a precinct--”

“Jesus, kid, you’re gonna put the poor lil lady to sleep,” I turned around and saw Morgan crossing the lobby to the bar, still in his work clothes.

“If I'm yawning it’s from my double shift, not his rambling. It’s been a while since I heard a good Spencer Reid knowledge dump.”

“You two know each other?” He leaned on the bar and I could sense him turning on the classic Derek Morgan charm.

“I could ask you the same question.”

“Uh, Y/N, this is SSA Derek Morgan, we work together, Morgan, this is Y/N L/N, we went to high school together.” The “I had a huge crush on her” was silent.

“Nice to meet you, doll,” he reached out a hand to shake yours. His eyes lingered on you for a bit too long, and I recognized the look in her eyes from the way she talked to Kyle in the halls before our study sessions, and I didn’t like any of that one bit.

Derek turned back to me, “JJ sent you down here a while ago, she’s looking for you.”

I glanced at Y/N and tried to hide the cocktail of emotions in my mind, “I guess I just lost track of time.”

He probably caught onto something because his regular teasing smirk flashed on across his face, “You guess, sure, loverboy, I’ll be in our room. Nice meeting you, Y/N.” He left and she waved, watching him as he left.

“JJ?” She asked, turning back to me.

“Coworker of mine, she left her purse down here and sent me to get it for her.”

“Oh, Blondie from earlier?”

“Yeah.”

“She seemed nice. So pretty!” She reached below the bar and pulled out the small black purse that was left behind about an hour before, holding it up to me and cocking an eyebrow.

“Yep.” 

“How long have you two been working together? Long enough to be more than coworkers?”

I laughed uncomfortably, “Uh, n-no, actually this is actually my first case on the field, before this I only really helped the team consult on cases, but this one was urgent and I wanted to visit my mom so they brought me along.”

“Well, send Diana my love.”

“Of course. And if you hear anything from Jamie about another missing kid, give us a call.” I reached into his pocket and pulled out a card, sliding it to her and leaving with a sympathetic smile, wishing I could say more.

              (Reader POV)

About a week after you ran into Spencer, you were closely following the story as it unfolded on the news. Another kid had gone missing, the second in two weeks. His name was Drew Olson, he was a year older than Jamie. They didn’t find a body yet, so there was still hope. Robbie hadn’t turned up either, which was the best news you had about him. No other bodies have shown up yet, and the cause of death for the boy they found was starvation, so the guy probably didn’t want to hurt these kids.

Regardless of whether or not the situation was actually dangerous, the school still increased security, since two of the victims were students. The pickup line was heavily monitored by teachers and faculty to make sure all students went home with their parents. You had gotten there a bit later than usual, forcing you to the back of the crowd where you couldn’t see the kids as they came out of the building. 

When you finally got up towards the front, there were only a handful of kids left.

And Jamie wasn’t one of them.

Panic started to twist your stomach into knots, but the rational part of your brain clawed at the inside of your skull saying he was just inside, he was waiting in a classroom, he was safe.

You pushed through to the teacher that was keeping track of names on her clipboard. She was younger, just about your age, and wore wire-framed glasses that complimented her dark braids. She gave a warm smile and asked for your child’s name.

“Brothers, Jamie Brothers.”

“Alrighty, let’s see--” she paused as her finger stopped over a name highlighted by a bright green, indicating that the child had been picked up: Jamie Brothers.

“He’s not here.”

“What? What do you mean he’s not here?” The part of your brain that said he was safe fucked right off and left you a shaking mess on the pavement. The teacher reached an arm out and held you by the elbow as your knees buckled beneath you. Other parents’ attention was suddenly directed towards you. 

“Ma’am, the sheet says he was picked up already.”

“But by who? Not me! So who the hell took my son?” All eyes were on you as you didn’t even bother to control the volume of your voice. 

“Mrs. Brothers, please remain calm, I’m sure there’s been a mistake, I can send someone in to find him inside the school.”

“Please…” You whimpered, unable to find your breath.

...Give us a call…

Spencer’s words echoed in your mind and you knew what you had to do, so you scrambled through your bag for the card you were given the week before. You frantically cursed under your breath as you searched for your wallet. You finally found it, taking it out with your phone so you could call the number on the card. It rang once, twice, three times before an unfamiliar voice crackled through on the other side. 

“Agent Hotchner.”

“Are you with the FBI?”

“...Yes, who is this?”

“My name is Y/N L/N, Spencer Reid gave me this number if I knew anything.”

“Do you have information regarding the recent abductions?”

“My son’s been taken.” You could feel the lump in your throat nearly restricting any words from coming out.

“Hold on, ma’am, where are you?”

“I’m at the school, he’s not here. I came to get him and he’s not here, I don’t know what to do!”

“Miss L/N, stay put, we’re on our way.” The call ended with a click and suddenly the world went quiet. There was nothing but the rush of blood pounding in your ears. All you could do was stare blankly at nothing in particular as the phone fell from your hand, hitting the pavement, your knees following quickly behind. You felt the bruises on impact, but you couldn’t care less about how much pain you were in, not when you felt this numb. Your pain didn’t matter anymore, all that mattered was that Jamie was missing and you were powerless to help. The remaining parents surrounded you, all clutching the shoulders of their children, their safe children, the ones they didn’t have to call the fucking FBI to pick up from school today.

When your brain was able to process information again, you noticed the school parking lot had filled with police cars, including two large black SUVs. You squinted through the inappropriately bright sunlight and the bitter tears in your eyes to see a tall man in a dark suit approach you. Behind him, a scrawny young man in a plaid buttondown was following closely.

You recognized him right away this time.

“Spencer,” your voice was barely a whisper as you attempted to stand on your shaking legs. You looked straight past the man in the suit and scrambled over to him. Before you could even reach him, his arms were stretched out to you, enveloping you in a tight hug as soon as you were close enough.

Your heart had to be beating out of your chest, and you were sure he felt it against him. The tears running down your cheeks stained his shirt, soaking him to the skin as he cradled your head against his chest, trying to do whatever he could to make you feel safe again, no matter how scared he was.

The man in the suit was now joined by an older man in a brown jacket and the man you met at the bar the other night, Derek, you think his name was. The suit turned to you and Spencer and introduced himself as Agent Hotchner, the man you spoke to on the phone. He asked you to describe what happened when you arrived, if you saw anyone who looked out of place, if you saw evidence of a struggle. Spencer’s arms never left your frame the whole time you spoke.

“Thank you very much, Miss L/N, I promise we’ll find your son, we have time on our side. Reid, stay with her in the meantime, Morgan, go question the parents, Gideon and I will talk to the monitors and see if they knew who picked Jamie was picked up by.”

“Yes, sir.”

All the men left to complete their tasks except for Spencer, who was supposed to stay put with you. The second you were alone with him once again, your face returned to the spot on his dampened shirt where it had previously been. One of his hands was planted firmly on your upper back, the other stroking your hair between his fingers.

It’s strange, really. Last time you saw him he was just a kid. A brilliant, sweet, small kid. The kid who’s hair you’d fuck with. The kid you held after his bullies hurt him. Then you don’t see him for over a decade and suddenly the roles are reversed. He was tall enough to rest his chin on your head now, which you had mixed feelings about, but you couldn’t deny it calmed you down. Almost as much as his quick yet steady heartbeat drumming right in your ear. The kid was still skinny, but his hugs were still warm. 

“You’re alright, we’re gonna find him,” he whispered into your hair, but you had a feeling those words weren’t only for you. After a few minutes, the three other agents returned to where you and Spencer stood, alerting the two of you that the team would be heading back to the police station where you were welcome to wait with them. Derek figured you were too shaken to drive yourself, so he offered to let you ride along with him and Spencer in the SUV, which you did not hesitate to accept.

Once at the station, you were greeted by the blonde from the bar. What was her name again?

“Jennifer Jareau, I’m the press liaison for the team. You can call me JJ.”

She sat with you while Spencer worked with the others on the case. You wanted to be updated whenever progress was made, but she told you that wasn’t totally possible. Regardless of how against the rules it was, she still gave you the profile. The unsub likely worked with children and knew them and faculty well enough to enter the building and take the kids without being noticed. They may be a parent going through a loss, as no evidence of sexual assault or any physical violence was found on the only body save for light ligature marks on the wrists. Due to the relatively nonviolent nature of the crime, the unsub could be a woman. They likely live alone since they are keeping several young boys in their home. Although this likely wasn’t the work of a pedophile, a trafficking ring could not be ruled out yet.

You suddenly understood why the victims’ families aren’t supposed to know the profile. You thought it would make you feel better, but it only made you feel worse. JJ opened up another box of tissues for you, got you water, and offered you snacks, but there was no way you could get anything down. Every sound, every person that passed the window, every buzz of JJ’s phone sent your stomach plummeting down a death drop. You had just calmed yourself down from yet another panic attack when you saw agents strapping on kevlar vests and putting their guns into their holsters.

They knew where the kids were.

              (Spencer’s POV)

I wasn’t allowed to see her before we left. I couldn’t tell her where I was going, I couldn’t tell her that Jamie would be okay, I couldn’t tell her anything. I barely spoke to her since we got back to the station, and that was hours ago. Now I-- we just have to leave her there again.

This was my first time going out on the field in this capacity. I’d never had to step out of that SUV with my gun out, ready to shoot anyone who threatened the lives of my team or any hostages they may have. I’d never had to strap on a kevlar vest and worry about the potential bruises that may be left behind by being hit with bullets. I’d never had to worry about not coming back before.

“Don’t be worried. If your hands shake you won’t get a clear shot,” Gideon reminded me in the car, as if I’d be able to get a clear shot with a steady hand anyway.

The unsub was a woman named Harriet Yanonovich. According to hospital records pulled by Garcia, our new tech analyst, her son had recently passed after a short and sudden battle against leukemia. This came shortly after Harriet had a miscarriage that triggered a chemical imbalance, degrading her mental health, which resulted in the trigger, losing her job at the elementary school that the boys had each been taken from. I would have felt bad for her if she hadn’t taken my friend’s son away from her.

But she did, and now I just have to hope she didn’t hurt him.

We arrived at Harriet’s house fairly quickly. Hotch sent Morgan and me around the back, he and Gideon would take the front. As we rounded the back of the house, we discovered that she had a storm cellar under her deck. The doors were closed with a heavy padlock. Morgan aimed his gun to shoot it off the chain.

“Don’t do that. The bullet would ricochet and hit you in the knee.”

He lowered his weapon, “You got a better idea, pretty boy?”

“Yes, actually.” I quietly crept onto the deck, lifting the welcome mat from in front of the sliding glass door into the absolute wreck of a kitchen. Under the mat was a simple looking key. 

“She’s a school teacher going through a depressive episode, not a criminal mastermind.”

“Alright then, genius,” he rolled his eyes, “Let’s see if it even works.”

I inserted the key into the lock, hearing a click and turning it with little difficulty. The shackle popped open. I gently removed it from the chains, trying my hardest not to make any noise that would alarm anyone in the cellar. Unwrapping the chains from the handles, I turned back to face Morgan.

“I accept your apology.” I attempted to muster my smuggest smile, but it was hard to mask the dread and worry on my face.

“Yeah, yeah, open up.”

He grabbed one handle and I grabbed the other, sliding the metal doors open and revealing a staircase into a shadowy basement.

“You first.” Morgan nudged my shoulder.

“What? No way! Morgan, this is serious!”

“So go! It’s your girl’s kid!”

He was right. Not about Y/N being my girl, because she wasn’t (though the thought did briefly replace the anxiety in my heart with pure light that I hadn’t felt since I was twelve), but I was still doing this for her. This case wasn’t just a job for me. This was for Y/N. For Jamie. Y/N deserves to see her son again, I owe her that much.

Derek would learn about my fear of the dark much later, but from how fast I jumped down those stairs into that cellar, he’d never been able to tell.

Against the farthest wall, there were four young boys all curled up in a corner. From the limited light, I could see they were all covered in varying levels of filth, the cleanest boy baring the face I had seen on Y/N’s phone screen. The boys all looked terrified, the two dirtiest looking thin and weak against the ties that bound them to a water pipe. I called up to Morgan to come down and lowered my gun.

“I’m Dr. Spencer Reid with the FBI, I’m here to help you guys, okay?” The boys all nodded. Morgan helped me untie their wrists.

“Do you know where Mrs. Yanonovich went?”

“She said she was going upstairs, and that we have to be good or else we wouldn’t get any supper,” Jamie piped up.

“How long you been down here, kid?” Morgan asked.

Jamie shrugged, “Couple hours.”

“Did she hurt any of you?” The kids all shook their heads no.

Hotch’s voice crackled over the radio, “We have her in custody, any sign of the kids?”

“Yep, we found them in the cellar. All are alive, but we may need a medic on standby at the station for some of them.”

“Are they hurt?”

“No, just malnourished. Definitely dehydrated.”

Morgan and I led the kids out to the surface, the setting sun creating a glare off of the tin cellar doors. We were greeted by Gideon and police rounding the corner to the backyard. The kids ran out the gate towards the police cars, eager to be home soon. 

               (Reader POV)

“Okay, I’ll let them know.” JJ hung up and turned back to you, a relieved smile gracing her face. You stood up, desperate to hear the news she had.

“They found the kids, Jamie’s safe.”

You couldn’t stop yourself from lunging at the woman you barely knew, wrapping her in a bear hug as delighted laughs left your lungs. You felt tears of pure relief drip down your cheeks as she squeezed you back, also letting out a deep sigh.

You waited impatiently in the bullpen, anxious to see Jamie unharmed and to give the team your gratitude. When they finally arrived, you saw your son walking hand-in-hand with Spencer and the older agent you believed was named Gideon. Spencer pointed over to you with his free hand and smiled, causing Jamie to drop their hands and sprint into your arms crying “Mommy! Mommy!” You immediately lifted him up and covered his face with kisses. The two of you held onto one another so tight, you were surprised either of you could breathe. Spencer came over to you, smiling with eyes you couldn’t quite recognize. 

“Thank you, Spencer.”

“No need, Y/N. I’m glad I could help. I just wish I could have met Jamie here on better terms!”

You adjusted your hold on Jaime to free one hand, stretching it out for Spencer to take it in his own. You squeezed it gently, smiling into those hazel eyes that had somehow never looked warmer before, despite the deep shadows under them.

“Thank you.”

His pursed lips twitched slightly and you noticed the tears brimming his sunken eyes. The poor boy needed sleep and a lot of it soon. He squeezed your hand back, sending shockwaves up your arms straight to your heart, which hadn’t felt this light since you were seventeen years old.

Taglist~~~

Lmk if you wanna be added! Some names didn’t work so if you don’t see your name as a tag just dm me a url and I’ll try to fix it

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[slipping-through-my-fingertips]

august

Summary: August slips away and their summer fling is going to have to end.

Notes: it’s my birthday!! To celebrate here is the august story of my folklore series

AO3

For most people, all roads lead to Rome but for one Kurt Hummel, all roads lead to the mall.

First stop: coffee.

Once Kurt had secured his iced mocha, he began his window shopping. It was just so nice to walk around the air-conditioned mall.

There were plenty of middle and high schoolers wandering around with their friends. Enjoying the freedom of summertime. Kurt was pretty happy to be able to spend his summer days at the mall; almost like a relaxing vacation if it weren’t for the fear of running into old bullies and homophobes.

His dad just wanted Kurt to work a few days a week at the garage when the staff was short but with Finn there full-time, Kurt was barely needed. So, he spent his days off running errands and wandering around the Lima Mall.

There was no way for him to get lost at the mall. One, he had become very familiar with the mall having spent many weekends with his girls from glee club here. And two, it wasn’t a very large place.

Eventually, Kurt decided to splurge by getting a cinnamon pretzel and found a bench to rest. It wasn’t long until a curly-haired boy took a seat at the other end.

Kurt wasn’t sure if he was supposed to say hello or not. They were likely the same age. Close in age and cute. While he was debating whether or not to engage with this boy, he made the first move.

“I’m Blaine.”

He’s now facing Kurt.

“Kurt.”

They smile at each other. Kurt can feel his face getting warm.

“You here alone?” Blaine asks.

“Yeah, you?”

Blaine nods. “Wanna walk together?”

Kurt holds up his half-eaten pretzel.

“Oh,” Blaine says, “that’s okay. I can just…”

Blaine moves to stand up and leave.

“No!”

It comes out louder than intended but it stops Blaine.

“I can walk and eat.”

****

They took road trips together and talked about everything except school. It was so refreshing to have something in common with another human besides McKinley High.

Blaine never said he was from Lima; Kurt suspected he wasn’t since he hadn’t seen him at school. Though, it was possible Blaine went to some private school outside of Lima. At one point, Kurt thought he might have to transfer if the bullying got too intense.

Honestly, it was just nice to have someone who understood him like Blaine did. They had so much in common from singing and acting to taste in Broadway musicals to the same favorite hate-watching shows. The only thing they seemed to disagree on was coffee.

Blaine had a strong opinion about drinking black drip coffee with a dash of cinnamon. Whereas, Kurt always got a nonfat mocha. However, they did agree hot chocolate was the superior wintertime drink to eggnog.

Blaine was willing to compromise in ways Rachel Berry never would.

So, it was no surprise to Kurt when he realized his feelings for Blaine.

Once again, Kurt Hummel was falling for a boy who wouldn’t like him back. This time it would hurt more because Blaine could like him, since he was also gay, but didn’t. Because who could love a boy like Kurt.

****

One day they were sharing a pretzel in Blaine’s car parked behind the mall as they typically did.

“Here,” he says, handing over the last piece.

Mid-chew, Blaine almost caused Kurt to choke.

“Can I kiss you?”

Kurt swallowed.

He must’ve been blushing because his face felt hot. Blaine clearly read the look on Kurt’s face as his answer and leaned forward over the center console.

The first thing Kurt noticed was that Blaine’s lips were dusted with cinnamon sugar. He swept his tongue over Blaine’s bottom lip gathering the flakes before painting Blaine’s tongue with cinnamon.

It was an intense first kiss to say the least. Kurt had always pictured a short peck as his very first but this was better. This kiss was just a few steps away from making out.

As the weeks of summer trickled by, Blaine and Kurt spent their days texting and meeting up to make out behind the mall. They’d climb into the backseat of one of their cars and for the next hour touch any skin available. If summer was good for one thing it was exposed skin.

Blaine often wore tank tops so Kurt became very familiar with the muscle tone of his arms.

Oftentimes, Blaine was the one reaching out first. Kurt found himself waiting by the phone for a text; careful to not have permanent plans in case Blaine called. He’d canceled anything to spend time with Blaine. As far as Kurt knew they only had this summer and now it was August. How many more days would he get with Blaine?

****

One late night in August, they went stargazing. Blaine had spread blankets and pillows on the hillside and managed to secure a cheap bottle of wine courtesy of his older brother. As it turns out, Blaine didn’t know much about constellations; luckily, Kurt did.

He spent loads of nights with his mom in the backyard. She told him so many myths of the sky.

Kurt shared some with Blaine, who had interlaced their fingers. Eventually their bodies were fully pressed together. Blaine was hovering over Kurt, placing kisses along his neck.

Kurt bent his head back to give Blaine more room to cover with his lips.

Then, shirts were riding up and removed. Blaine was playing with Kurt’s zipper.

“Can I?” He asked.

Kurt nodded.

“Are you sure?”

Another nod.

“I’ve never done this before,” Blaine whispers.

“Me neither.”

For two boys who have never had sex and weren’t necessarily prepared to that night, it was always going to be a little sloppy. Misplaced hands, teeth clinking against each other, and nervously checking if something was okay.

When it was over, Kurt pulled a blanket to cover them. Blaine was resting his head in between Kurt’s head and shoulder breathing him in.

“I could fall asleep so easily,” Blaine tells him.

Kurt agreed with him but he was seriously contemplating a different kind of falling.

****

Summer had to come to an end. Before Kurt realized it, he was laying out an outfit for the first day of school. He and Blaine never did have a conversation about what was going to happen to them after summer vacation. In fact, Kurt hadn’t heard from Blaine in a few days.

He texted but went to bed without a reply.

Meanwhile, Blaine was wide awake in his own bed. He stared at the unopened text from Kurt on his phone. He could text back but he didn’t know what to say.

Sorry, I’m moving schools tomorrow.

Sorry, I lied to you all summer.

Sorry, I’m not the person you think I am.

Every single message his brain could conjure up began with an apology.

In the end, Blaine ran out of time to text him back. From a restless sleep to breakfast to rushing to get to his new school on time, he was almost able to believe Kurt hadn’t texted him at all.

As Blaine introduced himself for the first time, his eyes caught sight of people passing the door; stranglers being tardy to their first class of the day. Every person in his peripheral vision made his insides jump. They all looked like Kurt.

Except, Kurt wasn’t here. Kurt could never be here. Whatever he and Blaine had over the summer was just that—a summer thing

Blaine never thought of himself as the type for flings but Kurt was different. He’d take any time he could have with him. If three months was all he had then that was okay. He knew this last summer would stick with him for a long time.

When he closed his eyes, he was staring at Kurt’s blue ones. He could feel Kurt’s fingers dancing along his naked back with the stars watching them.

Luckily, the classes seemed to be taking it easy on the students. Going over the class schedules, future projects, and what percentage of their grade was exams and quizzes. Of course, Blaine played plenty of those ice breakers and get-to-know-you exercises.

He loved those.

By the time lunch rolled around, Blaine even had someone to sit with in the cafeteria. A nice girl named Tina sat near him in history and offered him a spot at her normal table. Blaine had mentioned wanting to join the glee club and she bounced up to him after class.

“New Directions always needs members. Sit with us at lunch and we can give you pointers for your audition.”

He met Mike, Tina’s boyfriend, Quinn, head cheerleader, and Mercedes, second lead female soloist of glee. Rachel Berry soon joined the table and sized Blaine up. She had lots of questions about his range, experience, and if he was a spy. Her boyfriend, Finn, seemed suspicious of Blaine as well. Blaine was familiar with Finn’s concerns.

The pointed glares and scowl were markers of a jealous boyfriend. Finn wasn’t worried about Blaine becoming first male lead, he didn’t want Blaine to pursue a relationship with Rachel.

This was not the first time Blaine was being mistaken for your token straight guy.

The table just kept growing. People pushing tables together and pulling empty seats. A Mohawk boy called Puck was asking Blaine about sports he liked (mainly college football) when two more cheerleaders joined them.

Brittany, the blonde, was intrigued by a new student. She had some record to keep up and asked if he wanted to sneak off somewhere to help her with it. He declined. The other, Santana, was too busy waving to someone in the distance to really notice Blaine at all.

“Porcelain, finally,” Santana says, patting the seat beside her. “Meet New Kid.”

“It’s Blaine actually,” Rachel corrected.

The boy, Porcelain, sat down and looked over at Blaine. Their eyes met and instantly widened.

“I’m Kurt,” he says.

“Hi, Kurt.” Blaine watched the boy of his dreams swallow hard. “Blaine, it’s nice to meet you.”

Lunch continued and no one seemed the wiser. Why would the New Directions assume the New Kid in town had already met their beloved Kurt Hummel? No one's first instinct would be that these two boys shyly watching each other would be “they spent the summer hooking up behind the mall.” Well, technically making out at the mall and hooking up in the park, just that one night.

Blaine tried to participate in conversation so as to not raise suspicion that he was staring at Kurt’s lips, which he was completely guilty of.

Once the glee kids started talking about a disaster of a party Rachel once threw, Blaine is able to tune them out in favor of his summer memories.

Sitting in the dark movie theater and bumping hands with Kurt as they reached for popcorn at the same time. Reaching over, buttered fingers and all, to grab for Kurt’s hand. Being able to catch a glimpse of Kurt’s smile as the movie flashed in front of them.

Lost in his daydream, Blaine didn’t hear the bell ring until Kurt tapped his hand, which was stretched out almost in the middle of the table.

“Hey, time to get to class,” Kurt tells him, “walk with me?”

“Okay.” Blaine gathered his books and trash.

“Where to?” Kurt asks.

“Crafts actually.”

“Oh, that’s just down the hall here.” Kurt guides them through the crowds. “Thanks for not spilling everything to them today.”

“What do you mean?”

“Our summer together.” Kurt’s blushing. “It was special.”

“To me too,” Blaine assures. “I wouldn’t have said anything to them. I don’t really know those guys yet. I’m new remember?”

Kurt nods. “Not new to me though.”

“I suppose you’re right.” Blaine chuckles.

They reach Blaine’s art classroom.

“I’ll see you in glee club,” Kurt says.

“Okay.”

Blaine only lets Kurt take a few steps before he’s touching his hand. “Wait.”

Kurt is staring at their joined hands and examining the hallway before meeting Blaine’s eyes. No one else is paying them any attention.

There are so many words Blaine wants to say to Kurt.

Be with me. Please. Be mine.

Don’t leave. Don’t slip away.

Stay, stay, stay.

Instead, he steps closer to Kurt and cups his face with his other hand. Kurt leans into the touch. Blaine gives the hallway one last look but it’s almost empty. The late bell will ring soon so he can’t waste any more time.

Blaine leans forward and pecks Kurt.

“Please,” he murmurs, against his lips.

Not even sure what he’s asking Kurt for exactly. Kurt seems to know what he means without needing more information or clearer words than a simple ‘please.’

Kurt drops Blaine’s hand and pulls their bodies close together and opens Blaine’s mouth with his tongue.

There’s a bell ringing, which Blaine thinks must be his own form of fireworks.

“If you two are quite done, there’s a class happening,” Blaine’s crafts teacher tells them.

They pull apart instantly, red in the face from being scolded, Kurt hurries off to his own class. Blaine does another round of introductions and can’t remember anyone’s name but Kurt Hummel.

[capitalism-and-analytics]

I just dont understand how any salary over 100K is considered poor unless you have a bunch of debt and/or a huge family to support

In short, I just hold myself to very high standards.

I compare myself not to other single income earners, but to other household incomes (which usually have 2 income providers). I also know I am so far away from my max potential income that I can always achieve far more than I already am, so it's a bit relative to that. For ages 27-31, top 0.1 percent is roughly $300,000, so I have a long ways to go from ever achieving the top 0.1 percent. Furthermore, I may not have a huge family to support now, but I may in the future and it's best to be prepared for the financial challenges that may come with that. Also I've always had the goal that my future wife will not have to work unless she wants to, but I always want to make sure that I am capable of making enough that she has the option to not.

As I have alluded to previously, I grew up poor (as far as traditional US standards go):

Shared a bedroom with my sisters for a little, but eventually got a room to myself (though it wasn't technically a bedroom).

There were periods between overlap job shifts of my parents that when I was in elementary school (kindergarten through 2nd grade) that I would come home from school and be home alone babysitting my baby sister until my older sister got home from middle school (2~ hours).

Rarely went on vacations as a kid, except the occasional road trip to visit a relative

Ate A LOT of ramen noodles

Parents refused to pay for healthcare/dentist/eyecare/etc. I remember one time I got pink eye when I was like 6 and my dad yelled at me cause I was afraid to take the eye drops and he was pissed cause they cost $50.

Skipped several field trips or friend's invitations due to my parents convincing me that it wouldn't be fun or bribing me with dollar store gifts. Now that I'm older I realized it's cause we were poor.

I'm not saying I will spoil my kids or anything necessarily, but I can promise you that I will do better than my parents. Though just to be clear, I love my parents and although they did do a lot of questionable things and I don't agree with a lot of it, I still am very grateful for everything they did (food, shelter, etc.)

[whetstonefires]

Since you like the Hellboy...*perks up* Can I ask what you like about it? Does this need to be part of the ask game, if so, smash it in there. But opinions! I would love!

Ooh! Hm. This is actually surprisingly hard to articulate.

I’ve been ‘into’ Hellboy for like. Half my damn life now, and while I could have gone on at length about all the things about it I found fun as a teenager it was at its core very much a ‘this makes me Feel Happy’ thing. And now that glow is less intense but it’s bolstered by that habitual sort of attachment you feel to like. Family members.

Let’s see how far I can break this down lol.

I have never been able to much like most of the BPRD tie-in type materials and I was not at all pleased with the films, so to an extent I think I can say confidently part of what I like is the way Hellboy is situated in a superhero-comic-adjacent space while being very much coordinated by one overarching creative sensibility--like, other people were brought in to work on Hellboy a lot over the course of the run, but Mignola always had a unifying voice and even when I don’t actually agree with his taste or values that level of artistic...intentionality? Judgment? Presence? Something like that. Gives the work a sense of...integrity? Maybe just unity.

Anyway makes it feel less plastic than comics often do. This is a corporate product of course but it’s also just Mike Mignola hanging out doing whatever he thinks would be cool. Drawing rocks and monsters because that’s what he wants to draw. I like that.

Some of the higher-quality webcomics you get nowadays, when they don’t take themselves too terribly seriously but aren’t outright comedic, can land similarly in terms of voice, but even just fifteen years ago webcomics weren’t really at that point yet as a medium, and even now most are still amateurish as well as amateur. Which is fine, but different.

To get slightly less meta, I love the collection of genres that are smeared together for Hellboy--we’ve got a lot of detective noir stuff cut together with cosmic horror and like...the genre where people research folklore and then mostly punch it. Does that have a name? And then there are a bunch of other influences stirred in, sometimes for only a single issue, sometimes more.

Mignola managed to be significantly less offensive than average about the way he adapted world folklore into his weird groddy kitchen-sink fantasy system, which is pretty funny because he doesn’t come across as being careful about it at all. Not that I think there was no effort made, but also he just used research as a basis for narrative much more often than he started with a story premise and stretched the creature to fit, which by default gave him less scope for dickery.

Also I think the only god he ever fights is Hecate and she’s handled from a 19th-century-occultist angle rather than a Classical angle.

Also Hellboy fights Nazis and cyborg gorillas as well as like. Baba Yaga and vampires. The balance of schlock and gonzo nonsense to pathos and sensitive emotional bits is usually about where I like it.

The episodic format is really well used. It lets the storytelling style lean heavily on the late-19th-through-mid-20th-century short story genres that it borrows a lot from, and which honestly has always worked better for comics than end-to-end long-arc serialization. I like how the anachronic order of many sections of the series allowed for a lot of ‘building outward from the middle.’

Also it means the story can stay true to its roots and kill off a lot of characters in gothic excess without constantly sloughing main cast or having to do fakeouts.

...I can’t believe that since Hellboy isn’t really emotionally involved with the issue of his birth parents except inasmuch as it explains the world-ending stone hand, the single angstiest part of his backstory is technically when he went on a drinking binge road trip around Mexico in his teens and made friends with vampire-fighting luchador triplets but then the youngest one whom he was closest to was kidnapped by the vampires and Hellboy had to kill his best friend, and this is all established in a random side story that pushes the intentional genre absurdism to its breaking point and is equal parts comedic and grotesque.

(The second angstiest is probably the bit in volume 1 when he finds his dad murdered by frogs.)

I also just love characters who wear trench coats and are actually really clever and knowledgeable and kind but tend to resort, in extremity, to just hitting problems really hard. Okay? I like that. That’s a fave.

Hellboy’s whole character design is very strong, a bunch of dramatic broad-strokes decisions that contrast interestingly against one another, and then a lot of subtler elements layered in crosswise.

The way his relationship to the narrative ‘occult-fighting antichrist figure’ could be really straightforward, but keeps stepping a little sideways off the usual shape of the tropes in a way that creates depth.

He’s a giant red demon guy who stopped aging in the 50s; he’s never going to be able to be ‘normal’ or pretend he isn’t what he is--but also he’s a dude with a government job and probably a Social Security Number who goes and interviews people about the situation and says ‘I’m Agent Hellboy’ and gets called ‘Mr. Boy’ and is just this guy who knows his shit and can take a beating.

(This was one of the major things I hated in the first movie, that they decided to make him this weird secret cryptid whose dad keeps him locked in a vault when he’s not fighting.)

The way the identity thing is never reduced to comfortable binaries with him except by enemies trying to psych him out is just really satisfying. He fights monsters not because he hates them or himself but because he was recruited into this career young and he’s really good at it, and he feels good about helping people who are being victimized.

When something occult isn’t hurting anybody he’s down to chill, and if it turns out they secretly are after all he’s always so tired and disappointed, and if they really aren’t then he has a new friend. Whom he may never see again or may hit up for a game of cards next time he’s in town.

(I also like how he combines ‘being pretty private’ ‘being very casually friendly’ and ‘being an asshole who makes a lot of enemies’; it’s not that unusual a combo for his type of main character but it’s one I enjoy.)

When he breaks off his own horns as part of his rejection of being Anung Un Rama it’s not ‘choosing humanity’ or w/e it’s choosing not to be used for this. His name is Hellboy, which is an objectively awful name but it was given to him by people he loved and who chose him, not the people who made him or brought him to this world to be used, and he chooses it.

And that has weight. That has force enough behind it to carry a world.

Just in general in spite of all the identity stuff he gets swamped with he’s really good at self-knowledge and letting other people’s ideas of who and what he’s supposed to be just wash over him. As the story goes on and shit gets weirder his sense of identity gets shaken, but he never quite loses that anchor in the knowledge that he is the ultimate arbiter of his own identity.

His exasperation on being told via stabbing that he doesn’t get to be King of England even if he is the first male descendant of King Arthur since Mordred is so funny. Why is this a thing, says Hellboy. Why am I finding out like this. Why do I always find out this shit like this. Why would anyone think I wanted to be King of England. I already punched so many skeletons about not wanting to be King of Witches.

He’s got so much righteous anger that comes out when people are treated as disposable, or as less for being not human or less human or superpowered, and of course it’s founded in his own experiences and his own fight for respect but it’s not about him. It’s about the person who’s suffering now.

One time his combat one-liner before shooting something started with ‘The Torch of Liberty said I was the worst shot he ever tried to train’ that’s so funny! I love that!

He’s my boy okay.

[mcfanely]

Nightowls

Having someone be aware of a secret isn’t always a bad thing. It can sometimes be a relief even, the knowledge that someone else knows. That you’re not on your own anymore. That there’s someone to talk to. 

Chapter 09 - You Seem Happy, 2477 words

The walk back to the Monastery was pleasant that morning, even though they were a little later getting away from the studio than Cole would have personally liked. A full conversation with Chamille when the studio announced it was time to clear out for closing about actually organising a day to meet up with the other elemental masters; because there really didn't need to be a world ending disaster as an excuse to be in the same place at once. Then Lloyd and her had gotten to talking whilst Cole had excused himself to clean off in the bathroom; well that resulted in them leaving as the sun was cresting over the horizon line, more than an hour behind when he usually left. 

Lloyd could really talk sometimes. 

Yet it had been a relaxed silence since they'd set off. Cole was in a clean set of clothes, with a hoodie over the top to keep the morning chill away. The grass that sprung up at the side of the path was dusted with a light frost and a thin mist hung low over the lands. 

He took in a deep breath, enjoying the cool sensation that was brought with it. 

Then Lloyd turned to him, poised as if he was about to break the silence that had settled, which he promptly did, "So, that was fun." He grinned, shoving his hands into his pockets which didn't hinder the bounce in his step. "I mean, dancing is one thing, but you and Chamille not even having a plan?"

"Free-styling." Cole provided casually. 

"Free-styling. And a random song too, it was brutal giving you opera music, I mean, how do you even dance to that? Then you and Chamille were just like," Lloyd made a half-attempt at doing the robot, with an elaborated, "Woosh!" 

"And then, then Chamille was all like," An arm wave, a pretty good one if Cole's eyebrows shooting up was anything to go by. Though he just carried on watching the scene with a small smile, and the fact that Lloyd was basically dancing down the single dirt road that led back to the Monastery. It was a long trip, but he had a feeling it would go fast. 

"And then you were--" 

"Lloyd," Cole interrupted quickly, placing a hand onto his shoulder, "You haven't slept all night, you're getting your second wind. Take a breath."

Lloyd paused and did as he was told, though he was still smiling far too much for that hour of the morning. 

"You were so cool!" 

He'd said that multiple times already, and Cole was starting to believe it. 

"You can't tell anyone." He added after a short second and maybe half a block down the path. 

Lloyd kicked a pebble in his way, before nodding his understanding. He brushed some hair back from his face, "I know, I know. You said so earlier."

Even then, with that vein of conversation at a resolute end, Lloyd still looked like he had something to say. Cole tilted his head, "What?" 

"I'm not shocked you got into Marty's."

That was a bit off track, Cole rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. 

"Yeah, well--" 

"You've been sneaking out for a while, haven't you?" 

There it was, the supposed crux of the conversation. Abrupt, but sort of expected if he was being honest. If he took into account the clear worry that everyone had expressed, it was obvious that this talk was going to turn into an insightful one-to-one. 

There wasn't much point in lying anymore, so Cole simply nodded, "a couple months."

He didn't miss Lloyd's wince, "Have you even been sleeping?" 

"Big talk coming from the guy who knows I've been sneaking out, staying up and spying?" 

Lloyd's eyes widened, then he schooled his expression and fixed his gaze on the path ahead. They'd get to a woodland soon, and then the base of a far too long staircase, then home. 

"Don't try and change the subject, Cole."

There was a nervous laugh, and he was more than content to let everything go back to silence again. Just the sound of crunching gravel beneath their feet and the intermittent noise of bones popping as Cole went through his joints to help release any pressure, but eventually the evasion tactic wore out, and he relented. "It started because I wasn't sleeping." He explained losely, "Or like, when I went to sleep all I had was nightmares." 

There, he'd said it. 

Lloyd seemed to falter in his walk, almost drawing to a full stop as he watched and listened with far too much maturity for someone his age, and too much focus for someone who was wide awake at near six in the morning. 

He was going to crash so hard around lunch time, Cole could tell a mile off. 

Yet this time, the silence was a physical feeling. Cole had finished making his point, it wasn't in depth, but it was there. Yet Lloyd's staring just brought more words to the surface, "Of, you know, when I fell from the Bounty."

There's a pregnant pause, and Cole cleared a lump from his throat. 

"It's all I could think about and I would just wake up panicking--" 

"Why didn't you tell anyone?" Lloyd questioned, with concern lacing his voice. 

Cole just brushed it off, but the worry was warranted. If it was anyone of his family in the same situation he was in, he'd be worried for them too. Maybe that was a testament to what they were actually feeling in that moment. He would feel hurt if someone kept something like this from him, since Cole knew he could help in some way. "A walk fixed it, I didn't want to annoy anyone."

"Cole, it's not annoying if you need help. We're all here to help you with whatever problems you have. That's what family's for." 

Cole shrugged, smiled, then focused his attention on some of the neon orange paint stuck under his nails. He picked at that, stared at it.

"I know that." he whispered. Of course he knew that, he knew that he could have turned to anyone and asked for help, or just someone to talk to and have them listen. Even Jay would have taken the situation seriously, he wasn't always so immature. Cole had to give him some credit. "I just… Found something that made me forget about my problems. At Nightowls, I have, like, a life." He paused, considering how that sounded, "Not that I don't have one at the Monastery, with you guys, but--" 

"It's something normal." Lloyd said. Hit the nail on the head. 

Yes.

Cole laughed, and nodded, "Yeah. I've never had that. My dad's a famous singer, I was expected to follow in his footsteps in some way, I went to Marty's and then I ran away, then I became a Ninja." his life, summed up. In a way, everyone's lives paralleled that in some way. Particularly the one he was talking to in that moment.

Feeling as though they had to follow in their father's footsteps only to realise that they had their own lives to live, even if it was vastly different from what had been envisioned for them. 

"You were really good, though."

Cole laughs. 

"You were, though. You seemed so… Relaxed."

Cole draped one arm over Lloyd's shoulder and pulled him into a sideways hug, which dissolved into him ruffling the younger ninja's hair to within an inch of its life. "Do I not normally look relaxed?" 

"No," Lloyd managed out in the midst of batting at Cole's hand and arm until he was released, at which point he moved over to the safety of the other side of the path. Not that Cole couldn't reach him from where he was situated, "recently you've looked tired." He sighed, then his voice dipped in volume, and he just sounded that bit more worried, "We've all noticed, you know? We knew something was bothering you." Lloyd admitted slowly, then "We just… Wanted to wait for you to bring it up."

At that point, Cole realised that him bringing the issue up would have probably never happened by his own choice. He'd planned to, that first night. Then he just hadn't. 

They eventually made it into the woodland, sunlight moving through the gaps in the canopy crafted by crown shyness, leaves dusting the road. 

"How're the nightmares now?" Lloyd's voice was loud amongst silence. 

Cole ran a hand through his hair, "Honestly, better." He admitted, then paused, "Actually, I haven't had one recently, I didn't realise that."

Lloyd smiled, "Because you've been distracted by sneaking away and having fun."

"I mean, yeah, technically I have." He smiled, "I've been spending days training and nights dancing, truly I am living a double life." 

They both shared a laugh. 

"I mean, you're basically a dance vigilante with that mask."

Cole gave Lloyd a deadpan expression, "Never say those words together again."

Lloyd smirked, "Ninja by day," 

"Lloyd--" 

"Dancer by night."

"I swear to the First--" 

Lloyd quickly moved forwards and plucked Cole's mask from his belt, then pulled it on himself. There was a bit of adjusting, and the elastic was a little too large, but he got it comfortably sat on his nose at least. 

In the light of day, it was a funny sight. Lloyd, entirely dressed in green with a bright orange mask on that was definitely not as impressive as it was in the dark. 

"This is uncomfortable." He said after a moment. 

Cole just nodded, "It hurts the ears."

Lloyd took it off and stared at it, "It hurts the nose too. I don't know how you wear this and dance, you could have put some cushioning in it."

"I don't notice it when I'm dancing."

"A dragon would have been cooler, and it would have made sense."

Cole took the mask out of Lloyd's hands and held it to his chest, "Wow, I know when my talents aren't appreciated." He smirked, "Besides, it's sort of a joke. Deception, no one knows who I am underneath--" 

"And no one knows what you do when you sneak out."

He just blanked that quip, "And wearing the face of a species that was nearly responsible for my death is sorta cathartic. I wear it and I have fun."

"You looked like you were loving it."

Cole grinned, "Yeah. I never thought I'd dance again, to be honest. Not like that."

They finally reached the stairs up to the Monastery and the sun was a lot higher than he would have liked. If it was early, they could sneak in and everyone would be none the wiser. Any time after six was when their absence would be noticed. 

So reaching the top of the stairs would end in an interrogation and questioning, most likely. Cole hoped not. 

Lloyd started on the stairs first, but as far as Cole was concerned they were always the worst part of the night. It was easier to go down them.

"So, planning on sneaking out again tonight?" the younger ninja asked as they began the climb. 

"I don't know, maybe?" He'd probably give it a rest for a day or so. His sleep was nowhere close to being fixed, but he knew that if he managed to stay awake for the rest of the day, there was no way he could pull another all-nighter. He did it once, and regretted his decision immensely. 

Also, he knew what Lloyd was actually asking about, "To be honest, I'll probably sleep tonight and go tomorrow. Why, you want to tag along again?" 

The silence that followed was an answer in itself, and Cole just laughed, "You're sleeping tonight too. If Sensei Wu doesn't have my neck for you being up most of the night, then I know Kai will."

"Why would they blame you?" 

"Because I'm the one in charge." Cole spread his heads as if it was obvious. 

"And it's not like they would know I've been awake all night."

"You're starting to look like you've been dragged through the Boiling Sea backwards and then faced off against Sensei Wu's chicken. You look tired."

"Touché."

As they neared the top of the stairs, Cole began fiddling with the mask of the strap. He had all his old clothes in a bag over his shoulder but it was already pretty full to begin with, and he didn't have the heart to try and push the mask in too. 

Which left him resorting to holding it subtly behind his back, using the bagginess of the back of his hoodie to shield it from view as they stepped through the gates and into the monastery. 

Into the middle of morning training. They were so going to get found out, Cole was so going to get busted for what he'd been doing. Lloyd was going to slip up, it was obvious. 

Even as Kai walked over, sword sheathed over his back and spiked hair drooping from exertion, his cut eyebrow was raised and his gaze far too analytical. 

He had been doing so well, too. He could already feel his heart rate picking up, but externally he forced himself to keep his cool, "Hey, sorry we’re late."

"You guys didn't even leave a note.” Was the immediate response, and it was tense, “It's one thing Cole not being here and not telling us, but both of you?" Kai questioned, and the speed of which his hands were moving was an indication of emotion that he was trying to keep in check. 

Cole winced lightly, "Yeah, sorry. I didn't think, my bad. We were just--" 

Lloyd quickly stepped forwards and gave a slight smile, which seemed to quickly sway Kai's mood in a second. Big brother instincts, they could dial back just as fast as they surfaced. 

"We just went on a walk, spoke a little." He looked back at Cole and grinned. "I should have written a note but I didn't. We sort of… Just needed to get out for a bit." 

He was covering, Cole realised. He'd probably been thinking of an excuse for the whole walk. Something he'd forgotten to even do. 

He had to force himself to not look impressed as the words rolled easily from Lloyd's lips. Even he believed them, and he knew the truth. 

Kai seemed to cool down, and looked at Cole, "Are you okay?"

He let out a breath, and nodded, "I am now. The walk was good. I'm all good."

"Good." Kai nodded, then added, "You know we're all here to talk to if you need it."

Cole just gave a light laugh and nodded, carefully keeping the mask situated behind his back, "Yeah. Yeah, I know. Thanks, you guys. That means a load."

He looked at Lloyd. 

"Thank you."

-

From the beginning

Ch 08 > Ch 09

AO3

Notes: And thus concludes Nightowls, thank you so much for reading!

[aobawilliams]

First Line Tag Game!!

I was tagged by @idontonlytalkaboutdcmk

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line, then tag 10 of your favorite authors!

I’ll try to go from more recent to older (date of the creation of the doc will be written in MM/YYYY format), but this might not correspond to the time the sentence was actually written. (I might have missed some stuff but, oh well, whatever.)

1- (04/2021) Aizawa meets Izuku AU (MHA, OS in progress)

It was luck that brought Shouta here.

2- (03/2021) Vigilante Yagi AU (MHA, in-progress, either a long-fic or a serie of OS)

All Might has been a hero longer than he has ever been Yagi Toshinori.

3- (02/2021) Dad For All AU (MHA, various blurb on tumblr so far, most likely a longfic)

Izuku was trying really hard not to panic. One second he was fighting a villain with a still unknown quirk, the next he found himself __ years in the past, according to the news report currently going on TV.

4- (02/2021) Midoriya Inko’s Guide To Good Parenthood (MHA, in progress, probably a serie of OS?)

Midoriya Inko isn’t anything special. She's 30 going on 52, has a really bad case of anxiety, can and will cry for any reasons, and has gotten so many grey hair from her son's shenanigans its a wonder she still has green hair.

5- (12/2020) The Kids Will Be Alright (DCMK, spin-off of Sharpen Your Knives)

Ran was running. Fast, fast, faster, not fast enough. She put all her strength in her legs, went as fast as she could.

6- (11/2020) Before the coffee gets cold - The Sisters (DCMK, OS published on AO3)

It was probably foolish of her to come back to this place. But, on the off chance that the rumours were true, she wanted to give it a chance.

7- (11/2020) Sharpen Your Knives (DCMK, in-progress longfic, won’t be published for a long while)

Shinichi has no idea how things could have gone so wrong, so quickly.

8- (08/2020) The Time Travel Road Trip Case (DCMK, spin-off of Who The F- Is This) (technically not the first lines, but it’s the first part I’ve written)

Shinichi(Conan) felt someone lift him up from the back, he turned his face as he came level with their chest, one look at their face and…

Well, guess he found KID.

9- (06/2020) Who The F- Is This (DCMK, longfic in progress, the first chapters are on AO3)

Shinichi’s head was throbbing. He felt like someone was playing drums with his head. What has happened?

10- (06/2020) Harrinichi Kupotter (DCMK & Harry Potter x-over, longfic in progress)

Shinichi doesn't really believe in superior beings, gods or the supernatural. So far everything in his life could be explained by science and very human tricks.

11- (03/2019) Naobuza & Raphtaku AU (The Rising of the Shield Hero & Naruto x-over, an old baby I keep coming back to)

If you were to ask anyone to tell you about Naofumi Iwatani, those who remember him would tell you that he’s a weird kid. There’s something otherwordly about him, as if he was evolving in a totally different universe from them.

12- (01/2019) The self-indulgent FMA TT au (FMA, an old project that I should go back to, someday)

Somehow, sometimes, Ed felt like there was some being out there, out for him.

13- (01/2019) Nanadaime time travel AU (Naruto, will most likely be an OS, one day I will finish it enough to post it on AO3)

It was a late night In the Hokage office, one of many. As was usual by now, the Hokage was filling paperwork at his desk, his right-hand-man filling his own number of files at his side.

14- (11/2018) Baby Ed saving the world with hugs and punches (FMA, an old project that I will go back to)

On a warm night during the summer of 2005, as the sun left it’s place for the shining stars, Edward Elric went to sleep for the last time besides his lovely wife, in the house he has rebuilt with his own two hands.

15- (06/2018) The roadtrip 03Ed never knew he needed (FMA03/CoS & Fantastic Beasts and where to find them x-over, a serie of OS)

He wasnt sure what brought him back here.

Maybe he just wanted to make sure Envy was dead, one monster less in this world. Or maybe he just wanted to make sure there was no way between both world (no way to go home.)

16- (04/2018) Badass Women Roleswap AU (FMA, I still sometime go back to it, will most likely be a serie of OS)

Ed didn’t have many memories of his father. He could remember a tall man, who always looked sad. A giant who always had trouble when it came to holding him and his brother. A figure always working in his study. A person who always looked sad when teaching them alchemy.

17- (03/2018) FMA TT fic I wasnt planning to expend (FMA, old project, I will get back to it.) (it is, also, the first fanfic idea I got when I got back into writing fics)

Nothing happened as it should have been. No matter everything they’ve done to try and stop him, the dwarf in the flask still managed to bypass it all and, in some way, reach his goal.

And that’s pretty much it for any written stuff I got (anything else is too old)

Bonus: A la recherche du canard (Looking for the duck) - it’s an old assignment I had for french class, where we had to pick an article and write a short story based on it. (When I say old, I mean it’s from 2012 - it’s a good way to see how far I’ve come). It’s honestly really bad but I did have a lot of fun back then. (This is a translated from french version btw) (yes I stole names from Hetalia I was always terrible at finding names for characters)

The sun shined upon the sleeping man face, who opened his bright blue eyes. He got up suddenly, throwing his blanket on the ground. Today would be the day where he, Alfred F. Jones, Yorkville police officer, would accomplish his mission: keeping an eye on the annual fair set-up.

So, observations: You can very clearly see me go through various fandom phases it’s funny. Also my naming skills for the AUs got slightly better (but not that much.) I do tend to drop a name (usually the person from whom the POV is) in those first sentences. The first paragraph tend to get shorter with time (which might simply be because I realised I tend to lose focus when it gets too long.) I also never start on dialogue, generally I go for the POV’s thought uh.

I do quite like the ones for the Vigilante Yagi AU and the Midoriya Inko’s guide, The Kids Will Be Alright too. Badass Women I like it but also am not 100% happy with it.

This mostly made me want to share even more about these stories to y’all.

Anyway! Tagging @whoever wants to do it! I’m not sure whom I follow has already done it/been tagged or not, uuuuhhh, maybe @artistfingers ? If you’re a writer and wants to do it then go for it and tag me I guess.

[shuuos]

tag game!!!

i got tagged by @fandomfishbish !!!!!! :D :D :D

tag game rules: answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs you are contractually obligated to know better !!!

here are the questions and answers !!!

Name/Nickname: bo !!! i may snatch the name kiki too idk it’s cute tho

Gender: fuck uh good question. idk like it’s related to feminity in the way a dog is related to a wolf but that’s abt it

Star sign: pisces hell yeah!!! i looked up my star chart and immediately forgot so pls don’t ask!!!!!!

Height: 5’3″ and fuck all my friends who are taller than me /j

Time: uhhh mountain standard time if i remember right?

Birthday: march 17!!!

Favorite bands: suddenly i have forgotten every band except for fall out boy ngkcsnkl

Favorite solo artist: JUST ONE?? god uhhhh cavetown maybe?? dodie??? idk man there’s too many good artists out there!!!!!

Song stuck in my head: rät by penelope scott sdncfdkn the animatic vibes are too immaculate

Last movie: god wait i remember give me a second uhhhh GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY 2 I THINK

Last show: the umbrella academy bc my sister and i are still trying to binge watch it (and failing to get past the third episode orz we’re too sleeby)

When did I create this blog: ok let’s see i was in 7th grade i think so like.... sometime in late 2014-early 2015 i think?? idk i just know i was in middle school

What do I post: sometimes art, sometimes music, sometimes shitposts or other extremely good posts!!!

Last thing I googled: ancient girl names bc i’ve made yet another oc rip

Do I get asks: no :(

Why I chose my url: uhhh back when i was on deviantart i wanted a ~cool~ username, and i could have sworn i saw this on a username list but i can’t find it anymore so i guess i just made it up!!!!

How many blogs do I follow: 3599 holy shit

How many followers I have: 375 which is actually a lot more than i expected tbh

Average hours of sleep: about 12 hours on a good day, 4 on a bad one, i’d say?? usually i get 6-8 tho

Lucky number: 3, i guess?? that’s always what i’ve defaulted to anyway!!!

Instruments: i can play the ukulele and technically the piano but only by ear,,

What am I wearing: uhhhh shorts and the big star wars shirt my 8th grade homeroom teacher gave me for field day (i don’t watch star wars but we wanted a team uniform and her husband was a geek so she had a lot of shirts to spare sngckjfd)

Dream job: i’ve always imagined that being a freelance artist would be nice!! i don’t think i’m rlly made for capitalism tho i’d rather just run off into the woods and look at clouds

Dream trip: uhhh europe maybe?? i wanna see my friends over there,, or maybe a cross-country road trip????? idk i’ve never really thought abt this?

Last book I read: ,,,,,,, the angel experiment bc i needed to do research for some ocs

Favorite food: mmmmmmmm i’m gonna have to go with pan de dulce bc fuck yeah. sweets and bread.

Nationality: uhhh mexican-american on my mom’s side and venezuelan on my dad’s!!!

Favorite song: wh. why would you ask me this. i’m just gonna pick a song out of my spotify playlist and go: absolutely smitten by dodie HELL YEAH THAT’S A GOOD ONE!!!

Top three fictional universes: hmmm these aren’t in order at all but i’m gonna go with: maximum ride bc winge and also the pseudoscience is just vague enough where u can go buckwild with worldbuilding and i love it, revue starlight bc GOD the uniforms the stage girls wear are so fucking cool and i would kill to own one, and animal crossing bc it’s chill heart emoji

What is something you like about yourself?: if we’re talking physically, my hair is very soft and fluffy and it’s very nice, but if u mean like personality-wise, i am the funniest bitch in this house /lh

ok tag time!!!! unfortunately i have eggs eye and tea so i’m mostly gonna tag my friends and people i’ve generally talked to before:

@homotankki @aviandalek @maxtothemax @no1fan15 @procrastinatorkimberlygrey @autisticfang oh god i don’t talk to that many people uhhh if u see this feel free to use me as an excuse to answer these questions??? if u want???? there’s probably more people i wanted to tag but i have bad memory and Cannot remember

[purplesurveys]

1128

[created by: pinkchocolate]

When was the last time you were surprised, in a pleasant way? Wednesday when Bea had food delivered to my house. One of our clients was hosting a roundtable session and our task was to order food to be delivered to the attendees’ house, and it turns out she snuck in an order for me as well. 

It was super touching and I tried to do a nice deed yesterday by getting food for her as well; but as I mentioned on my previous survey, I got paired with a scammer delivery guy instead who ended up stealing my order...that I already paid for... :( It was such a flop and I ended up having to give away the surprise to Bea since I had to check if she received it, and that’s when I learned she never got anything. I’ll try again next week or whenever I get my money refunded, hahaha.

What color was the last fruit or vegetable that you ate? Green (green onion).

Is there a compliment you've received, that sticks in your mind? I like it whenever I’m told I write well, since that’s my main talent and it’s always nice to be complimented on my skills.

The last time you received a gift, what did the wrapping paper look like? I have no idea but probably red/green and holiday-themed since it most likely had been a Christmas gift.

What was the last book you read? Did you enjoy it? Not reading anything.

If so, what did you specifically like about it?

Anyone you haven't talked to in a while, that you'd like to hear from? Not really. It’d be cool to hang out with Sofie again because I haven’t seen her since our little trip to Nasugbu, but I’m not necessarily waiting on a message from them.

When you were a kid, did you own any accessories with your name on? Probably a bracelet.

Do you own any items of clothing that you haven't yet worn? Yup. I got a yellow romper from one of my aunts for Christmas, but I haven’t had the chance to wear it yet. It’s short and airy, so I’ll probably pull it out once the climate gets warmer again.

Were you awake before 8am today? Yeah, I got up at 4:30 earlier even though I fell asleep at like midnight. I think my body understands that my brain wants me to get as little sleep as possible during weekends so I can maximize my free time, so it woke me up by then.

Is there any food in your house at the moment, that you're looking forward to eating? I still have some of the chicken wings that Bea ordered for me. She got such a huge order and it’s taking me forever to finish the damn box of wings lol.

Is there anyone you know who dislikes the Internet, technology etc.? My grandma refuses to learn how to use a phone or laptop. Which confuses me because usually she’ll ask my mom to relay a message to one of her friends who are on Facebook, and my mom ends up playing messenger. Like pls just get at least a Facebook account if you want to keep keeping in touch with your acquaintances anyway :(((

Name any item in your bedroom that is blue. Trying to remember what’s in my room since I’m currently staying in the living room...and I think I have push pins that are blue.

Is there an ice-cream flavor that you strongly dislike? Which one? Rocky road and Double Dutch. Marshmallows and/or nuts in my ice cream is a big nope.

Are there any cat cafes in your hometown? There could be but I’ve heard little of them. I’m more aware of existing dog cafes.

Do you own any books with an image of a cat on the front cover? I doubt it.

Does anything you own have an image of a bird on it? It’s possible, but again I’m not in my room to check if that’s the case.

Do you know anyone named Abigail? Yes, my mom.

Do you ever use flavored lip balms? I don’t use lip balms at all.

^ If you do, what flavors do you like the most? Kate once had a peanut butter lip scrub that I loooooved to borrow. Other than that, the strawberry ones are nice too.

Does anyone you know own a spaniel? How about an Irish setter? My great-aunt once had a spaniel. Not sure about Irish setters.

What are your plans for the remainder of today? I wanna eat at La Creperie and spoil myself a litle bit, but we’ll see if I’ll have the energy to drive to the mall today. I’ll also have some work to do since we have a presentation on Monday :(

--

[created by: pinkchocolate]

Have you met somebody that you want to spend the rest of your life with? Yeah, ideally that would’ve been the case but they thought differently. I admittedly still feel the same, but I’ve also since been able to move on and move forward. If that makes sense.

Who was your closest friend when you were 7 years old? Do you still speak to that person? I actually met Angela when we were 7. And yes, we’re still the best of friends. I just shot a birthday greeting video for her mom last night.

Who was the last male you talked to? Does he have facial hair? Technically it was Cooper, but the last male person had been my dad. He does but for the most part he keeps it to a stubble.

How many times does the letter 'R' occur in your full name? Twice; in my first name and in my surname.

Is there anyone you love, whose name starts with 'S'? Sure, I can think of a couple of relatives whose names start with S.

What color is your TV remote? I haven’t used a remote in ages lmao, but if I remember correctly ours is mainly black.

When was the last time you went to a wedding? Who got married? 2007. My uncle and his then-girlfriend, who of course became my aunt when they wed. We’ve since had relatives who got married after that period, but for all those occasions only my parents received an invitation. It’s understandable though, I know they want to save up on costs and stuff.

Name a band you like, that starts with the 2nd letter of your name. One Direction is the only group coming to mind.

Have you ever dressed up as a Disney character? Which one? My 7th birthday gown was inspired by Cinderella’s, but it wasn’t the same exact dress as it was orange.

Have you ever played chess? If so, are you good at it? No. I’ve never been able to understand the rules.

If I wanted to buy you a chocolate bar, what kind should I NOT get? Mr. Goodbar has always been the least exciting chocolate to get hahaha.

Of all your close friends, who have you known the longest? Angela.

Do you own anything that has an image of a butterfly on it? Again, I could. I can’t think of any particular item, though.

Has anyone told you recently that they miss you? Yes, orgmates for the most part.

What was the last song you heard, that made you feel emotional? HYD by Hayley Williams.

What color are the socks you're currently wearing? I’m not wearing any socks right now. < Me neither.

How many friends do you have whose name starts with the letter 'R'? Just Rita.

How many vowels are there in your first name? One. Two if you count y.

When was the last time you took a selfie? Last Saturday, I think.

Name someone you know who has curly hair. Andi.

Have you ever worn orange eye-shadow? Never tried.

Name a song that reminds you of someone close to you. Be Alright by Dean Lewis.

Has anyone ever walked out of your life with no explanation? Yeah but they tried very poorly to keep in touch. It ended up being detrimental to me more than anything else so I took the initiative to be one step ahead and cut ties altogether.

Do you know anyone else with the same first name as you? I can think of one Robyn and one Robin.

Think back to 10 years ago. What TV show(s) were you into? Wrestling programs were all I watched as a 13 year old.

Do you have a favorite T-shirt? What color is it? Yes, one of my wrestling shirts. It’s predominantly white but it has some black and red on it as well.

As a child, did you ever have any scented gel pens or markers? Yessssssss. I spent more time sniffing them than writing with them too, lol.

Name an alcoholic beverage that you dislike. I find whiskey pretty nasty. I hate beer as well but sometimes I gotta drink it, especially when socializing.

Do you own anything that previously belonged to someone else? I wouldn’t say I own them; they do belong to the original owner and I’m just still borrowing them.

Who is the 8th contact in your phone? How did you meet them? That would be Angela haha; we met when we got assigned to be seatmates in 1st grade since our surnames were arranged alphabetically in class.

Is there anyone who sends you messages to say good morning/night? No.

Can you recall the last time you were on a dance floor? March 2020, at a club with mostly Hans’s friends.

Have you ever let someone go, and then regretted it? No.

Do you own any color changing mood jewelry? Nope and I don’t believe in those either so I don’t see a reason why I should get my own.

--

[created by: pinkchocolate]

Was there anything that you planned to do today, but didn't? It’s only 7:06 AM so I’ll refer to my plans yesterday instead – I wanted to continue working on a Google Slides presentation by nighttime, but I was so tired from my shift yesterday and even got a migraine that I never got around to it. I’ll have to work on it this weekend instead.

Is there anyone you interact with often on social media but not in person? I mean, hasn’t this been the case over the last year with the pandemic? I communicate mainly through social media now, if not through IM apps like Viber.

What color box does your favorite cereal come in? Don’t really like cereal. The closest thing I have to a ‘favorite,’ Cookie Crisps, comes in a white box, though.

Do you have any plates, dishes, mugs etc. with pretty illustrations on them? Nah, don’t really like printed stuff. Angela had a customized Friends-themed mug made for me but I wouldn’t call it an ~illustration, since the main design is just my name styled in the Friends logo.

Does anywhere on your body currently hurt, or feel sore? I actually took a break from this survey to take Cooper for a walk, and I think I can confirm that I definitely have some kind of allergy to grass. My legs were super irritated the whole time and my skin has since turned reddish.

What is your favorite snack to eat with a hot beverage? Croissants.

Is there any advice you have been given, that sticks in your mind? “Let your healing take time,” from Andi. He also accompanied it the advice with an anecdote about this basketball player who insisted on playing even while he was still dealing with an injury, and playing only aggravated that injury so he was forced to sit out for an even longer time than what was initially set for him. That was really helpful and I keep it close to me to this day.

What's the nicest advice you have ever been given about love/relationships? Know when it’s enough and when to leave, and be kind to yourself.

Do you own any adult coloring books? What kind(s) do you like? Yeah, I have like three thick ones. I just haven’t gotten the chance to touch them because for the meantime I only have cheap coloring pencils that start to get dull after a few strokes. I’ve yet to buy a more premium set of pencils.

When was the last time you got some new headphones? Headphones would be 2013 when my dad got me a pair of Beats. Not a big user so I haven’t felt the need to get new ones.

Is there a lamp in your living room? What color is its shade? No but my mom has wanting to get one for a while. She just can’t seem to find one that she likes.

Do you know anyone whose name starts with the letter X? I went to high school with a Xenia. Super nice guy; we were close friends for a while since we were seatmates, and our friend groups also overlapped.

Have you eaten any rice or pasta today? Not yet. I will definitely be eating rice though, because Philippines.

Name a food that you dislike the texture of. I don’t like rice pudding at all, or oatmeal. But those are also taste issues as well as texture issues. < Oooh, oatmeal is a good one. I also could never enjoy marshmallows in my ice cream.

Which of your friends do you confide in the most? Angela.

Have you ever fallen out of love with someone? I wouldn’t say that. There will still always be a part of me that has some sort of feelings for my exes. But the extent to which I love them/care about them fades over time, thankfully. < Yeah, exactly.

^ If so, why do you think that happened?

If you have pets, do you talk to them? Sure.

Are there any TV shows that you strongly dislike, but others seem to love? I tried to get into Grey’s Anatomy or Glee on Netflix, because they were “popular”, but I tried a few episodes, and just couldn’t seem to get into them. < OMG same again, especially with Grey’s??? I tried watching it a couple of weeks ago but I noped out as soon as I heard how poppish the theme song was. I’ve always thought it was a serious drama show but it turned out to have so many teen show elements to it that I was definitely taken aback. The script and some of the acting also kind of sucked, so that was a letdown.

Is there anything you haven't done lately, that you'd like to do soon? Coloring.

Do you own any T-shirts with brand logos on them? Yes, my dad got me a Vegemite shirt from his last contract abroad hahah. He was staying in Australia and I asked him to get a jar of Vegemite so I can finally have a taste, but I think he was scared that I’d hate it and end up throwing out the whole jar so he just got me a shirt instead lol. I’ve also got a Nike shirt somewhere in my closet.

Have you experienced any kind of food cravings lately? Surprisingly not. I’ve been longing to eat at La Creperie again but I’m not craving for anything particular.

Have you watched or read the news today? I watch the news every weeknight since we have it on during dinner.

Describe the cover illustration of the book closest to you. Can’t see any books near me.

Are there any take-away or fast food places close to your house? There’s a McDonald’s literally beside our village, and beside it are a Shakey’s and a Dunkin’ Donuts. There’s also a Burger King right across. If you drive for like five more seconds, there’ll also be a Starbucks.

^ If so, do you ever order food from any of them? Only from Starbucks. I don’t really get fast food anymore.

Is there anything happening tomorrow, that you're looking forward to? Nothing yet so far.

[softest-cinnamon-roll]

Omg u just posted part 2 but pleaseeee do the road trip au part 3. Whatever you want. With or without Sonia. I just LOVE reddie as parents and I need more of it in my life

part one || part two

“Are you sure this is a good idea, sis?” Ollie asked, looking down at his phone and then back up at his sister. “Dad thinks we’re visiting grandma and grandpa, he’ll go crazy if he finds out we’re here…” Glancing back at the house in front of them, Ollie swallowed.

Grace rolled her eyes and nodded her head, unbuckling from the car, “Well technically, she is still our grandma, just not the one we told dad we were going to visit. Not that I’m saying we won’t go and visit grandma and grandpa, but I just…I want answers.”

Even though Grace was a child when she had her first, and only encounter with her dad’s mother, the memory was still ingrained in her mind. She would never get over the way the woman had spoken to her dad, and then to her, in the middle of a supermarket that is.

“Okay fine, but after we’ve spoken to her we need to go to grandma and grandpas. Dad has probably already messaged them and they’ll be waiting for us.” Ollie sighed and Grace nodded before stepping out of the car and walking up to the porch.

Unlike her brother, she wasn’t nervous. She wanted answers. She wanted to know why someone would treat her dad the way his mother had. She may be her grandmother by blood, but in her heart? She was just another person in the world who was ignorant and selfish.

Grace kept her head high when she knocked on the door, firm and with purpose before stepping back. There was a noise behind the door before it swung open and Grace jumped back a little. The woman who answered the door wasn’t Sonia Kaspbrak, and Grace had to reset her brain as she considered maybe this was the wrong house.

“May I help you?” The woman asked, her eyes narrowing as she looked back and forth between Grace and Ollie. “I’m not looking to buy anything if that’s what you’re after.”

She moved to close the door and Grace jumped into action, stopping her with a shake of her head, “No, no uh, we’re looking for Sonia Kaspbrak? Is she home?”

The woman paused, blinking at the two of them before she sighed and crossed her arms. “Sonia passed away last week. Heart attack. I’m her sister, Marge.” She said. “What can I do for you?”

At the news, Grace felt a little heartless for the lack of emotion she felt over the fact that her other grandparent was dead. Though she wondered if anyone had been in contact with her dad. She doubted it, as apparently she passed away last week, and her dad hasn’t seemed off since then. Not even her Papa seemed off, and he couldn’t keep a secret to save himself.

“Oh I’m so sorry-” Ollie spoke up, as Grace had been silent for too long. “Uh, this might sound weird to you but we-” He stopped. “We’re her son, Eddie’s, children. Sonia’s grandchildren. We were in town and we wanted to, uh, connect with her?”

Grace rolled her eyes at her brother’s words and she finally found her voice, “Actually, no, Ollie is just being too polite. We weren’t here to connect, we were here for answers on why she treated our dad like shit. Since you’re her sister, I’m sure you’re aware. Would you be able to answer our questions?”

Marge, their great-aunt apparently, stared at the two of them for a second before nodding and stepping to the side, allowing them to come into the house. It wasn’t anything like Grace imagined and the thought of her dad growing up here made her shudder. “Please take a seat,” she motioned and both Grace and Ollie followed her instructions. “What would you like to know. I have to admit, I might not be able to answer everything but I will do my best.”

“Why did Sonia not want my dad and papa to be together?” Grace asked first, narrowing her eyes. “My dad being Eddie and Papa being Richie Tozier. I’m sure you know who he is.”

“Yes, I am familiar with who Richie Tozier is,” Marge sighed. “I can answer that. Sonia didn’t agree with homosexual relationships. It was against her religion. She also believed that Richard was corrupting Eddie and turning him against her. Which he did, in the end, as they ran away together without so much as a goodbye.”

Grace scoffed, crossing her arms, “They were in love with each other. Since when was being in love a crime? And my dad had every right to run away when he did, she was lying to him about his health! What kind of mother lies to a child about being sick? Ollie,” she pointed to her brother. “He has actual asthma, and do you know how difficult it was to get him diagnosed thanks to my dad’s child trauma? Too long!”

With a sigh, Marge shook her head, “Sonia wasn’t always like that. When Frank was still alive, they were a happy family. Yes, Sonia was a little wary of Eddie doing dangerous things, but Frank softened her out. When he passed away there was nothing stopping her from going insane.”

That was when Ollie finally decided to perk up, “But there was,” he said calmly. “There was you, and other family members. All you had to do was talk to her, and convince her she was being unreasonable. It wasn’t that hard, and yet…you didn’t bother did you?”

Marge gasped, “It wasn’t any of my business!” She hissed. “I wasn’t getting involved.”

“It was your business though!” Grace snapped. “Eddie was your nephew. He was family and I was raised to believe that family helped each other. Turns out it’s not the same for this family.”

The room fell into silence before Marge sighed once more, “Eddie left a lot of things behind, and they were put in the attic. I’ve sorted through it all. Would you like to take it?” She asked and Grace blinked, not expecting the question. “Some of the things were what he left behind before he ran away.”

Grace nodded, “Yes, we would definitely like to take it.” She stood up. “I think we’re done here though. Thank you for your time.”

Both Ollie and her helped take the boxes out into their rental car before driving the short distance to their grandma and grandpa Tozier’s house. When they got there, Maggie was out on the porch, running to greet them with kisses and promises of hot cocoa. Grace smiled and met her eyes with her brother, sharing a silent agreement.

Tomorrow they would call home and explain to their dad what happened, and what they had gained from the visit. Right now though, Grace was desperate for some of her grandma Maggie’s hot cocoa.

* * * * * 

@richietoaster @tozier-boy @eds-trashmouth @bitchbrak @sloppybitchreddie @its-stranger-than-you-think @maximusfraker @jem-carstairs-is-perfection @thejadeazalea @halfway-happy353 @tinyarmedtrex @inthebreadbinwrites @kat-ships-everything @takeourpure @lo-v-ers @that-weird-girls-blog @studpuffin @s-s-georgie @reddie-for-anything @trashmouthtozierr @richietoizer @girasol-eddie @bi-bi-richie @honeybeehanlon @mars-14 @reddiesetandgo @marsisaplanetyall @xandertheundead @sedanleystanley @hawkinsbabe @beepbeeprichiellc @stellarbisexual @oldguybones @thundercatseddie @eduardoandale  @purplepoisonedgem @reddie-to-cryy @pink-psychic @violetreddie @deadlighten @queen-sock @appojoos @moonlightrichie @rreddies @disneyfan567 @annxmatron @lifesucksheres20bucks @anellope @roobarrtrashmouth @are-you-reddie-for-it @callmechee @nancynwheeler @reddieforlove @twoidiotsinl0ve @madi-artist @tozierking @s-onora @atownofeggs

[motorizedbicy]

Best Electric Bikes for Every Kind of Ride

Around the country, bars, dining establishments, and also various other public spaces are shut or have actually restricted solution. Public transportation is becoming an extra iffy proposition, and cities are closing roads to provide pedestrians more room to move near their houses.

Go into: the electric bike. You do not require to be healthy to ride one. It gets you outside, lowers fossil fuels, decreases congestion, and also it's enjoyable. Over the past few years, we have actually attempted practically every type of ebike there is, from sturdy cargo bikes to premium mountain bicycle. Whether you're tooling around your neighborhood purchasing wood chips from the hardware shop or trying to trim a couple of miles off the trip for a socially distanced see, we have the very best ebike for you.

We will certainly be remaining to test and trip bikes throughout the summertime, so if you do not see one you like now, be sure to inspect back later. Once you get one, take a look at our favored biking accessories, too.

Have inquiries concerning electric bikes? Sign up with the conversation in the comments section below.

Updated for June 2020: We got rid of a number of older choices as well as included new ones, like the Propella 7-Speed.

The Very Best Bike

Specialized Turbo Vado SL Equipped

When I needed to return this electric bike (9/10, WIRED Recommends), I practically cried. The small, yet effective, customized motor as well as slim battery are integrated into the structure, so it doesn't even look like an ebike. The XS frame evaluates 33 extra pounds, just a couple of more than a normal steel bike. It has a hybrid structure with flat handlebars that make it simple to steer on a selection of surfaces, whether you're scooting along at 28 miles per hr or bumping through trees at your neighborhood park.

Specialized's Smart Control system suggests you don't need to readjust aid while you're riding, or bother with having sufficient battery to get house. A surprise shock in the head tube paddings the blow from any unforeseen fractures. Also the accessories are first-class, like long, adaptable custom-made fenders that sluice water down and also far from you in the rain. I place 40 miles on it in three days. It was so fun that it was hard to jump off.

The Very Best Affordable Bike

Propella 7-Speed (V3.4).

Who am I kidding? Unless you're already an ebike fanatic, you possibly desire one that's as close to $1,000 as feasible. That's a tough proposal if you want a dependable electric motor and also a frame that won't bend at 15 miles per hour. Propella's direct-to-consumer 7-speed (8/10, WIRED Recommends) is the very best low-cost bike we have actually located. Reviewer Parker Hall noted that it has trustworthy elements like a Samsung battery as well as Shimano disc brakes, and cool accessories like a trendy suspension seat. At 39 pounds, it's likewise pretty light for an ebike! It ships straight to you, too, which comes in handy if you would love to stay clear of a bike shop now.

Best Utility Bike.

Rad Power Bikes RadRunner.

Regardless of which bike I recommend, many people I recognize directly buy this one. It has an apparently magic mix of affordability and also effectiveness. Seattle-based Rad Power Bikes ships its bikes direct-to-consumer, and also rather than working solely with business like Bosch and Shimano, it likewise establishes its own custom hub-motor drivetrains with a variety of different suppliers. Additionals like light weight aluminum pedals and added equipments are stripped off in favor of a big 120-pound back rack as well as huge, steady, custom-made Kenda tires.

Nearly any person can utilize the RadRunner (7/10, WIRED Review)-- whether you want a comfortable cruiser for coastline rides, a steady seat for your 4-year-old, or you simply want to ditch your gas-powered Vespa. If you have actually never gotten on a bike before, the Elby S1 additionally has a very easy step-through frame as well as costs trimmings, like Tektro hydraulic brakes. It's much more expensive, though.

Best Freight Bike (and My Fave).

Tern GSD.

The Tern GSD S10 (9/10, WIRED Recommends) is my favored freight bike (of those I have actually examined), as well as it's the one I would purchase if I had the ka-ching. Tern utilized a number of creative design tweaks to make the bike easy to ride-- for example, tiny 20-inch and fat motorcross tires assist maintain the bike's length equal to an average roadway bike. The rear rack is likewise reduced for much better stability, as well as the battery and motor are under the shelf, instead of placed on the downtube.

You can likewise keep it standing up on its end. That remains in enhancement to an adjustable Bosch electric motor, which you can update to a double-battery system. My regional bike shops have trouble keeping it in stock. If you do not require such a long tail, Tern likewise released a much shorter HSD that can suit one child seat.

A Light, Budget Friendly Cargo Bike.

Bike Friday Haul-A-Day.

Bike Friday's Haul-A-Day isn't for every person. The majority of parents that desire a longtail cargo bike will certainly choose something heavier as well as more secure, like a RadWagon or a Yuba Boda Boda. As a brief moms and dad that has to deliver 2 kids, this is the bike I in fact have. It has a special telescoping tube that can shorten the bike to fit riders as short as 4' 6", and also it considers 44 extra pounds-- practically 15 pounds less than the Tern. It's also much more inexpensive, though this is understood by replacing a reputable, effective Bosch drivetrain with a Tongsheng one.

Ideal Minivan Alternative.

Riese & Müller Lots 60.

A year after checking it, my spouse and I still wistfully talk about how much far better our lives would be if we had our very own R&M Load 60 (8/10, WIRED Recommends). The full-suspension, double-battery Tons makes use of a Bosch system to power its bakfiets-style freight box around community.

You can customize the freight box with low sidewalls, harnesses, and a rainfall cover, or you can remove whatever off as well as get devices at the hardware store. It additionally comes with valuable additionals, like Tektro hydraulic disc brakes, an easily flexible seat, and also an integrated wheel lock that lets you lock the bike up while it's free-standing.

A Lot Of Versatile Bike.

Yamaha Wabash E-Bike.

A gravel bike is a functional choice for whatever from daily commuting to mild weekend bikepacking journeys. The Yamaha Wabash (7/10, WIRED Evaluation) is more budget friendly than the Turbo Vado SL, as well as I used it for every little thing from heading to my regional cafe to striking (some) routes on the weekends. Yamaha's custom motor and also absolutely no cadence trigger are effective enough to let me start up in the middle of extremely steep hillsides. It also has back shelf installs, an LED headlight, and a little bell. I did find its slim wheels as well as lack of shock absorption rather disconcerting on rougher roadways. Specialized additionally has an extremely wonderful gravel-ready electric bike.

Finest Electric Mountain Bike.

Specialized Males's Turbo Levo Comp.

While several communities have limitations on whether electrical bikes are also allowed on single-track (thin) tracks, reviewer Stephanie Pearson had a blast on Specialized's initial pedal-assisted mtb (8/10, WIRED Recommends). It has a rigid, crooked structure that's longer in the front to make pounding the downhills feel smooth and safe, along with a 500-watt electric motor with Smart Control, which means you don't need to adjust aid when riding. It really feels equally as enjoyable as a nonelectric bike.

Best Folding Ebike.

Gocycle GX.

Gocycle was founded by Mclaren Automotive designer Richard Thorpe, and also the GX (7/10, WIRED Testimonial) is its fast-folding bike. The streamlined light weight aluminum structure conceals a 300-Wh lithium-ion battery inside. As opposed to simply switching over from 4 fixed aid settings, Gocycle's application allows you play on a gliding range to call in various quantities useful in correlation with various degrees of pressure on the pedals, that makes it a dream to ride. You can rubber-band your phone to the handlebars to function as your console. It likewise has only 2 joints, that makes folding and unfolding very easy, as well as can be kept standing with the kickstand prolonged.

An Inexpensive Foldable Ebike.

Jetson City Foldable Electric Bike.

Ebikes are expensive, as well as we did review the Jetson City (6/10, WIRED Testimonial), which rings in at under a grand. It has most of the bells and also whistles that you need for a commuter ebike, like a 250-watt electric motor hidden in the crossbar, around 40 miles of variety, 3 levels of pedal help, a throttle, and also a horn. Nonetheless, in just a week of testing, I chipped off a part of the clamp that hooks the bike with each other, which doesn't bode well for the bike's long life over the long run.

Guidance to Bear In Mind.

Recognizing Electric Bike Specs.

Similar to any kind of bike, electrical bikes featured a ton of different technical specifications that you might or might not appreciate. Much more economical ebikes use hub motor drives, where the electric motor is in the center of the bike's wheel. A lot more costly mid-drive motors, like Bosch or Shimano systems, remain in the facility of the bike as well as transfer the power to the wheel by means of the chain. Mid-drive electric motors allow you move equipments and stabilize the bike's weight much better.

If you stay in an area that's wet or uneven, it's worth shelling out for an extra powerful 500-W or 750-W electric motor as well as a few extras, like hydraulic or mechanical disc brakes, which will help stop you as well as your freight from skidding right into website traffic. If you have a longer commute, you may also wish to search for a double-battery system, as the range on many ebike batteries is within 30 to 50 miles.

Ebike Classifications and Policies.

Examine Your Neighborhood Regulations.

Prior to you buy your electric bike, make sure you can really utilize it! Many cities as well as states have local laws managing when as well as where you can use an ebike. At least 22 states currently make use of the three-class system, and also may restrict when and also where different courses of ebikes might be made use of, depending upon if they have a throttle or can assist over 20 miles per hour. Cities might additionally have regulations about whether hill ebikes are enabled on single-track tracks. If your state identifies ebikes under the exact same regulations regulating motorbikes as well as mopeds, you might require a certificate to ride one. As well as regardless of what, always use a helmet.

[razorblade180]

Lasting Embers pt9: Market Trip

[drive way]

Yang:*looking at an old school black and yellow mustang* Well this is new....

Yujin:This old thing? *rubs the hood* Dad got Stinger not long after you left. He had to end up taking me to a lot of places he had to go since there wasn’t always someone to babysit me. A motorcycle isn’t exactly child friendly.

Yang:Stinger huh? *inspecting it* I don’t think I ever knew Jaune was into retro; sweet.

Yujin:(Guess dad was right about her loving vehicles) you ready to go? *holds up the keys* passenger side is unlocked.

Yang:Passenger?

Yujin:Yep, I’m the one driving here. Surprised? I have my license.

Yang:......You turned 15 today....

Yujin:Yep *hops into the car* Long story short, I’m pretty awesome. Now let’s roll.

Yang:Uhhh okay then. (This kid, my kid is full of surprises I guess)

[open road]

Yujin:*driving*......(it’s been ten years...)

Yang:*staring out the window*.......(so much to catch up on...)

(Yet here we are speechless....)

Yujin:Sooooo...

Yang:Hmm?

Yujin:Uh nothing. (Come On Yujin! Stop being chicken. You wanted this your whole life.)

*hands slightly trembling*

Yang:*notices* (What to do...?) So, I heard you’re into Adam.

Yujin:*red* What!? *slightly swerves*

Yang:Sorry!? I was just trying to...I’m bad at this. *getting anxious*

Yujin:*sigh* Dad talks too much.

Yang:*mumbles* Can’t say I approve.

Yujin:You mumble worse than grandpa. I literally heard every word.

Yang:Oh, my bad. I guess I don’t exactly have the right to judge any of your actions.

Yujin:....I know what he did, his past I mean. He’s been completely transparent with me and even told me about you. That probably doesn’t make you feel better but I thought you should know. Adam’s been....nice to me.

Yang:*squints* hmmm still can’t say I’m filled with fuzzy feelings. But I guess that helped a little.

Yujin:It’s not like I’m fawning all over him. He’s just cool; besides he married anyways.

Yang:*whips head around* That man found a wife!!?

Yujin:Yeah he doesn’t talk much about her or his personal life too much. Makes sense seeing how he technically is dead to the world. *sarcasm* You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that would you?

Yang:I mean.....I might be half the reason hehehe. (She totally knows I stabbed him) I have no regrets.

Yujin:You shouldn’t, he sounded like a real piece of work back then.’

Yang:So, got a crush on anyone that won’t raise my blood pressure.

Yujin:What’s up with you and the love life questions?

Yang:*flustered* Coming up with conversation starters is hard!

Yujin:I guess that’s true. Well...there is this other guy. *red* but getting him to look my way is a bit challenging to say the least.

Yang:He sees you as a friend?

Yujin:More like he’s too busy looking at guys.

Yang:*jaw drops* You’re crushing on a gay guy?

Yujin:*red*No!! He’s bi....says the world is filled with too many amazing people to only admire half of them. He’s real sweet though, bit of a scatter brain sometimes.

Yang:Does this heart throb have a name?

Yujin:*beat red* That secret stays with me!

Yang:*admiring her* I swear you sound just like your dad. You even get as red as him

Yujin:That’s rich considering everyone compares me to you. *rubs her arm*

Yang:You okay?

Yujin:It’s nothing, probably from our fight earlier.

Yang:Pull over for a second and let me see.

Yujin:Ummm ok *slows down car* I’m telling you it’s fine though.

Yang:*inspecting it* It’s dislocated you dummy!

Yujin:Really? I guess that explains why it’s hard to move. I’ve dislocated things before; this feels different maybe- OW!

Yang:*popping it in place* You didn’t feel it earlier because you were too busy fighting and feeling other things. I’m the same way honestly. Especially with my semblance.

Yujin:*looking at her eyes* I guess we have that in common. Changing eye color and all. Purple seems a little random and too on the nose though.

Yang:I don’t think so. Maybe they’re trying to red but because your eyes are blue they end up looking like mine.

Yujin:Wow...*starts driving again* that sounded really lame. *grins*

Yang:Ah? *flicks her head* I am not lame. Between me and your father I’m the cool one.

Yujin:As far as I’m concerned both of you are nerds in your own way. I saw the way you were gawking at Stinger *revs engine*

Yang:Naaaah I’m pretty cool. So is your dad honestly. Especially when he got to use the sword of destruction.

Yujin:I’m sorry the what?

Yang:Jaune never told you the story of him fighting a warped version of his partner with the sword of destruction.

Yujin:Dad did what!!!!!?

Yang:I can’t believe he hasn’t told that story. I guess there are plenty of things he thought were better of not telling a kid as a bedtime story.

Yujin:Well that sucks. *pouts* he’s always skipping over the interesting stuff.

Yang:....How much longer till we reach the market?

Yujin:About 15 minutes or so.

Yang:Guess I better talk fast then.

Yujin:*eyes get big* You mean....?

Yang:So there we were back at a ruined Beacon. Nothing but a menacing dragon made of cracking stone and an old friend now standing in our way....

[scarletwelly-boots]

Books Read 2019

It’s time again for my annual books read post (a little earlier than usual, but I couldn’t wait). I read 24 books in 2019, 4 books more than last year, though two are in progress and I expect to finish them by the new year.

It is year four of the reading challenge from Popsugar. There were 48 categories this year, so I got 50% again. Unlike last year, I did not change any categories, but I may have taken liberties with some again, we’ll see. So, without further ado, let’s begin the list. [Under the cut]

1. How to Train Your Dragon, by Cressida Cowell (A book becoming a movie in 2019). Okay, so there have already been two movies in this series, but the last one (*sob*) came out this year, so it counts. I read this book and a few of the others in the series a few years ago, but revisited the first one this year. It’s really good, but don’t go into it expecting it to be like the movies. The character names are the same, but that’s about it. If you can get your hands on the audiobook version, it’s read by David Tennant, which is excellent. Definitely recommend; it’s just as good as the movies.

2. Little House in the Big Woods, by Laura Ingalls Wilder (A book that makes you nostalgic). This is another reread. My dad read the whole series aloud to my sister and I when we were barely older than Laura is in the first book. It was the series he read before the Harry Potter books came out, and we both got sucked into that series. So yeah, very nostalgic. This is a series of semi-autobiographical stories chronicling Wilder’s pioneer childhood, and this is the first in the series. Some of the language doesn’t really age well, but for the most part it’s a delightful book.

3. An Absolutely Remarkable Thing, by Hank Green (a book you think should be turned into a movie). Holy. Shit. I was very, very pleasantly surprised by Hank Green’s debut novel (and yes, John Green is his brother). This is a mysterious book about first encounters and internet fame, with a queer young adult (like, really YA, as in post-college) protagonist. She’s kind of shitty sometimes, but I would argue all twenty-somethings are shitty sometimes (I mean, I literally typed “*sob*” two entries up, like I’m channeling my 2009 self, and I didn’t delete it.). I would highly, highly recommend. And apparently, SOMEDAY, there’s supposed to be a sequel, thank GOD.

4. Loki: Agent of Asgard, by Jason Ewing (a reread of a favorite book). I could actually get away with a reread for this one! I love this graphic novel series. I love how they depict Loki, how he finally gets a goddamn redemption arc. It’s a really fun read. Check it out.

5. The Beast Within, by Serena Valentino (a book inspired by mythology, legend, or folklore). A companion novel to Disney’s Beauty and the Beast. I don’t really remember much about this book. It was weird. But like, it plays with the timeline and the curse a little bit, where the beast gets cursed but doesn’t become a beast immediately. He slowly transforms as his behavior gets worse and more cruel. Apparently he used to be friends with Gaston, but Gaston forgot about him once he finally transformed. Really weird. If you’re obsessed with this fairytale like I am, give it a shot. If not, it probably won’t be that interesting.

6. Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austen (a book you see someone reading on TV or in a movie). Another reread. I know it’s a classic, but I seriously just love this book. 

7. Howl’s Moving Castle, by Diane Wynne Jones (a book about someone with a superpower). Another reread of a favorite book, what can I say. The movie is my favorite movie, but the book is better.

8. Carry On, by Rainbow Rowell (a book told from multiple character POV’s). Okay, listen. I had to reread this book, because it had been a few years and the sequel came out this year. Think of this as generic brand Harry Potter if Draco was a vampire, was Harry’s roommate, and helplessly in love with Harry. I’m serious, it’s generic brand. But damn if I don’t love it. @JKR, this could be us but Harry had to be the jock that married his high school sweetheart and grew up to be a cop. Definitely read.

9. Franny and Zooey, by JD Salinger (a book with no chapters/unusual chapter headings/unconventionally numbered chapters). My brother got me this book for my birthday. Before this I had only read Catcher in the Rye, which I started out hating when I was fourteen but turned into loving when I was nineteen. Honestly I think this novel is better than that one. I really loved it. Highly recommend. What’s it about? Who the fuck knows? But to quote my brother: “At its core, I think this book is about a smart brother and a smart sister. I think we can relate.” So read it and buy it for the smart brother or sister or sibling in your life.

10. 1916, by Tim Pat Coogan (read a book during the season it is set in). This is an Irish history book about the Easter Rising of 1916 and (what I didn’t know when I started reading it in April) everything that came after that can trace its cause back to the rebellion, all the way to the centennial of the Rising. The Easter Rising was the catalyst of Irish freedom. It was like the Boston Tea Party of Ireland, rather than the Battle of Yorktown (as in it kickstarted the War for Independence but didn’t immediately result in freedom), that is, if the instigators of the Boston Tea Party were rounded up, imprisoned in Kilmainham Gaol, and a week later almost all executed by firing squad. It’s a tedious read if you’re not into Irish history or history in general, but I enjoyed it.

11. Loki: Where Mischief Lies, by Mackenzi Lee (a book set in space). Okay, technically it takes place on Asgard and Earth, but those are planets, and planets are in space, so it counts! I’m still reading it, but I really like it so far. (Honestly I maybe just like the idea of Loki in knee high black boots marketed towards women and black nails. I never promised not to be gay.)

12. Norse Mythology, by Neil Gaiman (a book set in Scandinavia). I’m sorry! I read this book every year. Neil Gaiman is an amazing writer, and we all know I’m gay as shit for some good Loki tales. 

13. Artemis Fowl, by Eoin Colfer (a book that takes place in a single day). Okay, I know people love this fantasy series, and since it’s Irish I fully expected to, too. But I didn’t like any of the characters enough to read the rest of the series, least of all Artemis himself. I struggle to enjoy stories if I don’t like the main character, and Artemis was kind of a shit. Sorry, I did not like this one.

14. Skulduggery Pleasant, by Derek Landy (a debut novel). I just started this one, too, but I really like it already. I think the audiobook is read by the same guy that read Artemis Fowl, but already this is way better than that one. The characters are likable, for one (god, the bar is so low for fantasy books for me right now). It’s a mystery and a fantasy, and the main-ish character is literally an anthropomorphic skeleton detective. It’s excellent. I’m going to read the whole series. (I have to; my mom accidentally got me the 12th installment for my birthday.)

15. Red, White, and Royal Blue, by Casey McQuiston (a book that’s published in 2019). I read this twice. It’s so beautiful. I really expected it to be a shitty YA novel, but it wasn’t! It was very romantic (once they stopped “hating” each other), and gay. The premise sounds far-fetched: First Son of the United States falls for the Crown Prince of England. But, guys, it’s soooo gooooood. Highly, highly, highly recommend. 

16. The Wisconsin Road Guide to Mysterious Creatures, by Chad Lewis (a book featuring an extinct or imaginary creature). I mean, you can make your own decision whether these cryptids are real or imaginary. This is a travel guide to cryptids in Wisconsin, which I got on vacation earlier this year. I liked it, but reading a road guide for pleasure is admittedly kind of weird. Recommend if you’re planning a road trip through Wisconsin and want to stop at some cryptid, ghostly, or Nessie-like hotspots. Or if you just want to fuck Mothman, like me. (Dustybae’s not in this particular travel book though.)

17. Take Me With You, by Andrea Gibson (a book recommended by a celebrity you admire). Okay, so it was by a celeb I admire, not recommended by. This is a very quick read, of quotes from Gibson’s poetry. They are a queer spoken word poet with some really good pieces. They’re on spotify and apple music, probably among other sources. Recommend their work, but the book is very short, so maybe only purchase if you enjoy their work.

18. This is How it Always Is, by Laurie Frankel (a book about a family). This book was really, really good. It was passed around the aunts in my family until it got to my mom and I, which was really kind of a magical thing. It’s about a family navigating the challenges and gifts of raising a trans child. I cried a couple times, and it was so good. It’s written by a parent of a trans child, so it came from a place of understanding, and it was interesting to read this type of narrative from a parent’s perspective, when usually being genderfluid myself, I tend to consume media that is from the perspective of trans characters themselves. I had some very interesting conversations with my aunts and mom about it, and I really think this book changed my family a little bit, and I didn’t expect it to change me, too. Highly recommend. 

19. Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, by Suzanne Clark (a book that includes a wedding). So the wedding is at the very beginning, and sadly not between Strange and Norrell. But it’s really good. Lots of magic, lots of regency-era Britishness. The book is huge, but there is a miniseries on Netflix based on the novel and that’s really good too. Highly recommend, and still in love with my man John Childermass. Hnng.

20. Wayward Son, by Rainbow Rowell (a book by an author whose first and last names start with the same letter). Sequel to Carry On. Sheer madness. I loved it. Think of it as generic brand Harry Potter post-DH, if Harry sprouted dragon wings during the final battle, is gay as shit for Draco, and a year later Harry, Draco, and Hermione are set loose on America with .5 seconds of research, severe culture shock, one cell phone between them, and a half-assed plan to rescue Ginny who may or may not want to be rescued. Shit show, but well done and I’m fully invested and ready for the third installment.

21. Good Omens, by Neil Gaiman (a book with a two-word title). I’m sorry, I need to shift to caps for this. GUYS I FUCKING LOVE THIS STORY YOU HAVE NO IDEA IT IS THE GREATEST THING THAT HAS EVER COME INTO MY WORLD! I MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE WATCHED THE AMAZON SERIES THIRTEEN TIMES TO DATE AND IMMEDIATELY DEVOURED THE BOOK IN THREE DAYS. You don’t know what it’s about? Where have you BEEN?! An angel and a demon who are gay as shit for each other and love humanity way more than either of their respective sides. One downside is that as the miniseries came out like twenty years after the novel, my two favorite parts were only written for the series, and are not in the novel. But the book is still very, very good. 15/10.

22. Dumplin’, by Julie Murphy (a book revolving around a puzzle or game). I took game to mean competition, so this is about a beauty competition. I watched the Netflix movie first. I honesty thought I was not gonna like it, but holy shit it was amazing. Admittedly I think the movie was better (despite having Jennifer Aniston in it), but the book was really good, too. Recommend.

23. The Picture of Dorian Gray, by Oscar Wilde (your favorite prompt from a past Popsugar reading challenge; a book with a queer protagonist). God, please read this book. This has been up there in my list of favorite books since I was fourteen. Oscar Wilde is a master storyteller, and Dorian Gray is intriguing and despicable and beautiful. I’ve already read this, but I love it too much not to.

24. Terrible Queer Creatures, by Brian Lacey (a book set in an abbey, cloister, monastery, vicarage, or convent). Okay, so it’s not set there for the whole book, but gay monks and nuns are things. This was another birthday present, and an absolute hit. Combining two of my favorite things: Irish history and queer history. I had no idea a book like this existed. I’m still really excited about it. The only issue I have is that most of the one chapter dedicated to gay women involve biographies of people that were actually probably trans men, like Dr. Barry. They could have probably had a separate chapter and then a chapter of the clear lesbians and bisexual women (including trans women, of course). Lumping them in with the women in a chapter specifically dedicated to queer women did not seem particularly inclusive. But overall I really enjoyed the book.

Top Ten Books of 2019 post will be forthcoming.

[raybansandcoffee]

Adventure of a Lifetime: Chapter Nine

If you need to catch up you can find all of Adventure of a Lifetime HERE.

**********

I’m on my way.

I am ready. See you in a bit. :)

“Savannah!” I yelled. I heard her laughter drift through the house before I heard her hurrying up the stairs to my room.

“Yes,” she said as she came into the bathroom and sat in the chair at my vanity.

“Do I look okay?” I asked. I knew I looked nervous and panicked. I felt it too. Enough that I’d snuck a beer into the bathroom with me while I got ready. I took another drink as Savannah gave me a once over.

“You look great.” I had put on a pair of black leggings and an olive green top that was long enough it basically qualified as a dress but it had a high low hem where the high was TOO high and the fabric was so lightweight it would be see-through without layers. A little bit of lace from my black bralette peaked out of the v-neck when I moved. She sat trying to talk me through my anxiety as I finished getting ready. I didn’t have much time, over the last two weeks I’d learned the exact amount of time it took Jeremy to get to my house, which was about 3 minutes less than it took me to get to his house. “It’s gonna get chilly when the sun goes down. Do you have a jacket?”

“I was going to wear my denim jacket.” Her face contorted. She apparently didn’t like that idea.

“Nope. I’ve got the perfect one.” She stood up and left the bathroom. I put down the curling iron from the last loose curl I’d added to my hair to make it look like I tried but also not like I tried too hard. I shut it off before following her into the bedroom. She walked out and threw a jacket at me before throwing a pair of shoes.

“Why are you throwing things at me?”

“Because you don’t look like yourself. I’d tell you to wear the black version of that top but then you’d look like the angel of death so the green works, plus it makes your eyes pop. The black ankle booties are cute but halfway through the night you’ll regret them, you always do. Checkered Vans are who you are. They are part of your brand, your ethos, your…I don’t know what they are but you need to wear them.” She’d picked out a black and white pair that somehow didn’t look like I’d worn them for 10 years, they must be the new ones I ordered a few weeks ago. I pulled the jacket back and looked at it. “Tony told me what he said about the photo of you in that jacket in your studio. Wear it.” I smiled looking down at it.

The Rebel Girl Inside Me Will Never Die.

“You think?” I asked.

“Yes. Do it. The Rebel Girl inside you needs a night out or it’s highly possible she might die. Tony and I have the kids covered tonight. Stay out. Drink a little too much. Have fun. Relax. Be 36 and single for a night. The #MomLife you live will be waiting for you in the morning, or afternoon if you’d prefer it that way.”

“Oh shut it. I am not coming home tomorrow afternoon, I’ll be home at a reasonable time. I am so not staying at his house. We don’t even know if this is a date or not. It’s dinner.”

“It’s dinner together. At a restaurant. Without your kids. Without your brother. Without me. It’s a date.”

I’d kept pushing back the night together. Made excuses and reasons we needed to do stuff with the kids instead. Or that we should take Tony to this really great dive bar not far from my house for some live music or karaoke. I’d pushed back as far as I possibly could. It was Wednesday night. Tomorrow my family would arrive. They’d all be leaving in the morning and get here sometime in the afternoon or evening. Alex and her family would get her Friday mid-day. Sam’s family would be making the trip for Friday dinner and coming back on Saturday for the service since it was a short drive for them. I would have a full house for the next five days. I’d also run out of every logical reason we couldn’t be alone. Tonight was the night. It was all or nothing. To say I was incredibly anxious was an understatement, I was borderline terrified.

I wasn’t lying, I didn’t technically know if it was a date or not. But, all signs pointed towards date. We’d seen each other several times over the last two weeks. Lots of hanging out as a family, the girls really loved that they could still see each other even though school was on break. Then Sunday, Ava left to go stay with her Mom. She wouldn’t be home until Friday. Jeremy had still texted me every morning and found excuses to see me. I knew part of it was because he was lonely and processing the alone time without his kid. The weekends that Ellery and Axel would go stay with Sam’s Mom and Dad I usually sent Savannah home to see her parents. I’d wander around the house alone in sweatpants and go through a few too many bottles of wine or whiskey and probably too much weed in the timespan. As much as I hadn’t prepared myself to be so attached to them I was and when they weren’t in the house it felt unbelievably empty. I felt empty. I’d sit and stare at the house I called home now. The house that was so perfectly Sam and Michael and so not me. I felt the life drain from me when the kids were gone and they weren’t even my flesh and blood. It had to be exponentially harder for Jeremy. Ava was clearly his universe.

“So really? The vans and the leather jacket? It’s it too casual if it’s a date.”

“It’s borderline. It’s not too casual because you look fucking hot and that’s all he will focus on. The green makes your eyes stand out and show just how green they are. It’s also just casual enough that if this is another night of Jeremy trying to not be alone and not a date that you aren’t overdressed. If you’d worn the black dress you had picked out earlier you’d be overdressed if it wasn’t a date.” My phone beeped to signal that the gate had opened.

“Shit he’s here.” I grabbed my bag, threw on the jewelry I’d left laying on my dresser and hurried down the stairs behind Savannah. I ran to the kitchen and kissed the tops of the kids’ heads where they were seated at the island. “Be good for Savy and Tony tonight, promise.”

“Promise,” Ellery said. “Will you be home before I go to bed?”

“I don’t know. But Uncle Tony promised to sing songs with you tonight. That’s way better than me, right?” She smiled and nodded before shoving another spoonful of macaroni and cheese into her mouth. The front door opened and Jeremy walked in. I smiled and waved at him before giving Ellery one final kiss on her forehead. “Text or call if either of you needs anything.”

“We’ve got it covered, sis. Go be a grown-up.” He kissed my cheek. “Hey, Jer.”

“Hey T. Well hello Ellery Marie. Is that mac and cheese for dinner?” She nodded. “Nice choice.” He glanced at me. “ I talked to Ava before I came to pick up your Mom. She says hi and she can’t wait to see you on Friday.”

“I can’t wait for her to meet Papa and Nana and Aunt Frankie and Uncle Ryan and Aria and Harlow and Carter and and and everyone.” Ellie was excited about this weekend which made me happy and sad all at once. I’d told her that we were having a party to honor her Mom and Dad. She thought it would be like a birthday party, which honestly it probably would feel more like a birthday party than a funeral.

“You ready?”

“Yeah, let’s go.” Our last goodbyes were said and we headed out of the house and towards his truck. He walked with me to the passenger side, opening the door and helping me in. Once we were on the road, he turned music on and we drifted in between conversation and singing along to the music. “So where are you taking me?” I looked over at him and smiled hoping that the thoughts going through my head about if tonight was a date or not didn’t show in my face.

“I thought that we could go to dinner at the restaurant down by the shore to start and then go from there.” The restaurant he’d picked was one of the nicer places near me. Basically all of the restaurants I frequented were kid-friendly and honestly, I hadn’t done a lot of eating out in the last year.

“Ooo. I’m excited now. I’ve been there twice. It was great both times.”

“Well, I’m hopeful that the third visit will be even better. When did you go before?” he asked.

“The first time was several years ago with Sam and Michael when I came to visit. The second was when Frankie and Alex came out for my birthday last year and took me out for dinner without any kids.”

“When was that?”

“Is this your way of asking me when my birthday is?”

“Maybe.” He laughed a little bit.

“It’s October 31st.”

“Halloween. Well, that explains a lot.” I reached over and punched him in the arm. “I meant that in a good way.”

“Uh-huh. Sure.” It wasn’t much longer before we got to the restaurant. Jeremy was opening doors, pulling out chairs and had his hand on the small of my back when we walked anywhere. The date-o-meter in my head kept ticking closer to ‘date’ and less away from ‘night as friends.’

“So are you ready for everyone to get here?” Jeremy asked as soon as our drinks had been delivered.

“Umm, yes and no.” I sighed before taking another drink of my wine. “I’m ready for a chance to see my family. I’m ready for a chance to see Sam’s family and for the kids to see their grandparents. Saturday is the actual thing, Celebration of Life or whatever we are calling it. Sam’s Aunt, Uncle, and their kids will be there too which will be nice. I’m not 100% sure I’m excited to have all of those people in my house. Alex really thought we should invite some friends from LA and I wasn’t really in the mood to argue with her about it so I let her do it. I think there’s a few who RSVPed for Saturday, not many though. I let my sister handle all of that stuff. Of the people who contacted me about it, most replied saying they couldn’t make it, a few had some comment about how the funeral was a year ago, or that I should’ve planned it in LA so that they could come. All of that was why I didn’t want to invite people. Well, that and I’m tired of the faces.”

“Faces?”

“The faces people make at me or the kids when they see us. You know because they all moved on shortly after the funeral. They expect that I’ve also moved on because you know it’s been a year, why on Earth should I still be grieving?”

“Grief is different for everyone. People shouldn’t judge you for how you need to process such a huge loss. You went through more than everyone else. You had to experience so much trauma that other people didn’t have to experience. I am proud of how well you’re doing.” He reached across the table to where my hand was resting and placed his on top of mine. His thumb caressing it softly. “Do you really have friends who judge that you’re still grieving.”

“Yes.” I didn’t really know how to talk about this. But I knew I needed to or at some point this weekend I’d have a breakdown and there would be screaming and throwing things and it would not be good. “Alex judges it. You know because she’s a ‘doctor’ she thinks she knows just how I should be doing at this point.”

“She’s a doctor of English Literature.”

“Yes, yes she is.”

“She sounds like she’s fun at parties.” I almost choked on the drink of wine that I had just taken as I laughed. He had heard a lot of the phone calls I’d had with her in the lead up to this weekend. Listened to me rant and rave about the text messages and emails she’d been sending me. She felt that she should always be in charge of things, she always had, and because this entire weekend was the work of myself and my sister it was making Alex ridiculously difficult to deal with. “I promise I’ll be on my best behavior all weekend around her.”

“You know you really don’t need to spend your whole weekend babysitting me through this.” He’d cleared the entire weekend to make sure that he could be there for me at any moment that I needed him. He’d even offered to sleep on a couch so he could be at my house. I’d admitted to him earlier this week after a few drinks that the closer the anniversary came the harder it was for me to sleep. I’d had a recurring nightmare over the last year that was happening frequently this week. I’d woken up screaming one night and was glad that the kids’ rooms weren’t close enough for them to hear me.

“I’m not babysitting you. I’m going to be there for you because I care about you and you may eventually need backup. Or maybe someone to sneak you out of there for a little while.”

“Or a lot of alcohol.”

“That too. I’ve got it all covered. It’s going to be a good weekend. From what you’ve told me about what you and Frankie planned it sounds like it’s going to be a wonderful time and a great way to celebrate two people you love.”

“It should be. Ellie is so excited about it and I feel so horrible. I told her it was a Celebration of Life, so she basically thinks it’s a huge birthday party. Except unlike a birthday party, she’ll get to watch me cry the whole time. Okay, I guess that’s basically like all of the birthday parties now. Turns out I’m the one who is a ton of fun at parties.” Jeremy laughed a little. He’d quickly figured out I used humor when processing all of this and that he was allowed to at it because I did.

“Birthdays are hard, aren’t they?”

“The worst. Ellie’s birthday is in three and a half weeks. We were still in LA for her 5th birthday. It was the week before we moved here. I was a mess through the entire thing because I was leaving LA, I’d lost my best friend, I was responsible for a 5-year-old and a 2-month-old. I was the fucking conductor on the Hot Mess Express. If Mandi hadn’t thrown the party together and somehow figured out everything that Sam had planned before she died it wouldn’t have happened. I was still so heavily in mourning that I couldn’t function. I put on a happy face the whole fucking day. I said I was so happy that everyone came and honestly I really was happy everyone had come. Ellie deserved a good birthday. But as soon as everyone was out the door it was like I had a psychotic break of some sort. I started sobbing uncontrollably. I was screaming at everyone and no one all at once. I threw the beer bottle in my hand against the side of my Dad’s house and crumbled to the ground. Eventually, after bawling on the ground for a good 15 minutes Ryan picked me up and carried me up to my bedroom. Frankie laid beside me for the next 10 hours while I cried out every tear I’d held inside.”

“What brought it on?”

“Someone told me the birthdays would get easier with time and used the dreaded phrase that I no longer allow.”

“They are in a better place?” I nodded before taking another drink of my wine. “Worst. Phrase. Ever. I’ve never lost someone the way you lost Sam but even I hate that phrase. Or ‘God has a plan’ I heard that one a lot after my divorce. I highly doubt God’s plan was for my wife to put my daughter and me through the hell we went through and if it was I’m not quite sure what his plan is.”

“Also a super shitty phrase. Or ‘God doesn’t give you more than you can handle.’ I literally couldn’t handle breathing most days. Those phrases always pissed me off. I know people intend for it to be comforting but they are the least comforting thing someone could say, especially when you consider that Sam and Michael weren’t religious at all. They got married by a judge that my Dad was friends with. The kids were never baptized, we just had a party for them after they were born where everyone promised to accept these kids and the lives they chose to lead. Whether they worship a Christian God, a Greek God, Buddha, Elmo, or Satan that we were required to love them, support them, and let them explore life the way they wanted to. It involved streamers and flower petals and looked like a fun party that everyone would want to go to. Essentially that’s what Frankie and I used for our inspiration for Saturday. Friday night is just family and the closest friends. We are doing a really nice dinner with Sam and Michael’s favorite foods and a chance for us to have a quieter event.”

“All of it sounds like it’s going to be a great weekend. You’re all still coming over Sunday to swim and have a barbecue at my house, right?” I nodded.

“Frankie thought it was great that Ellie’s best friend wanted everyone to come to her house.”

“Leaving out that it was someone that wanted to do it for you I see.”

“No. I just try not to go into detail with my sister because it will become a deposition about my social life, more specifically my love life. She’s almost done with law school, she’s scary good at interrogating me. It’s like the worst cross-examination you could imagine.” I was ready to not talk about me and the heavy weekend that was approaching me. “How have you been holding up this week?”

“As good as I can, I guess. Thanks for putting up with me being around a little more this week. It’s always hard the first time she leaves for a long summer visit.” I’d started to learn a little bit about Jeremy’s custody arrangement with his ex this week. Ava had left Sunday morning to go stay with her Mom for the week. She was supposed to be there for two full weeks but he’d explained to his ex that Ava wanted to be in town to support Ellery and somehow that worked. She’d be back in Tahoe for the weekend and next week before Jeremy left to go back to LA with her for a while so that she could have more time with her Mom. Evidently, in summer it was two weeks with her Mom, two weeks with him, off and on. He’d slowed on work because she’d started school but he’d be leaving to go work on another Marvel project eventually and he was worried about how it would disrupt her life. Her Mom was trying to convince him that she needed to spend the next school year in LA since he didn’t know how much of it he’d be gone for. He wasn’t ready to agree to that and I didn’t blame him. I also hoped it wouldn’t happen because Ellery would be lost without Ava at school.

“I’m not putting up with you. I…I maybe like being around you, a little bit.”

“I like being around you too.” His smile lit his face up. I liked seeing the real smile and not the forced one he’d been wearing a lot of this week. I also loved that he could see through my bullshit, my terrible jokes, and see me behind the facade. “You’ve made what is normally the worst week of the year for me a lot easier.”

“You’ve done the same for me. Saturday is going to be a hard day. The closer it gets the more anxious I feel about it. Thank you for the distraction tonight.”

“I’m always happy to be a distraction for you.” Dinner was unbelievable. The food was delicious. He’d reserved a table inside the restaurant right by the window so we could watch the sunset. We had a leisurely dinner and sat there for over two hours. He even insisted on having dessert even though I was fairly certain I couldn’t eat a bite more of food. It felt good to be out of the house for a little while and not worrying about needing to get home. I knew that my brother and Savy had control of the kids tonight. I had all day tomorrow to prepare before my family got there and I’d have almost a full 24 hours with them before Alex, Max, and the boys arrived. Jeremy was going to be there for dinner tomorrow night so that my family had a chance to meet him before Alex got there. I needed backup since I feared she’d be super judgmental like she usually was. I wasn’t 100% sure why I was afraid of her judgment. After all, Jeremy and I were just friends.

“Thank you so much for tonight,” I said as we walked towards the car after dinner.

“Who says tonight is over?” His smile gave him away. I could almost read the thoughts in his head like there was an ominous movie voiceover happening. Charlie was right. Tonight is definitely not over. Jeremy had more up his sleeve.

“We just had the greatest dinner. What the hell else could we possibly do?”

“There’s a lot that we could do. Trust me.” He winked at me before opening the door to the truck and helping me in. My pulse started to race. I took a few deep breathes as he walked around the truck and climbed in. He drove through town stopping in front of the dive bar we’d taken my brother to earlier this week. I turned to look at him.

“Is your plan to get me drunk tonight?”

“Maybe.” His laughter filled the truck. “I’m not really. I know you have a lot to do tomorrow. But I thought you deserved one relaxing night where you didn’t have to think about what this week means, who you are supposed to be, and what you are supposed to be doing. Tonight you don’t have to live up to anyone’s expectations, you just need to relax and have fun.”

“And you are in charge of this fun?”

“Yes, yes I am.” We both climbed down from the truck and as I got to the front he reached for my hand, grabbing it and dragging me inside. He pulled me closer to him, wrapping his arm around me as he opened the door of the bar. Music poured out into the street from the jukebox. The place had a small crowd but decent considering it was a Wednesday night. His arm didn’t move from around my waist while we walked through the bar. We found a high top table right next to an open pool table. “I declare a rematch from Sunday. You cheated.”

“I did not cheat. I hustled your ass.” I batted my eyelashes. “Oh Jeremy, teach me how to play pool.”

“Yeah, you conveniently forgot to tell me that you a pool shark.”

“No, I’m just a kid who grew up with a pool table and parents who worked all of the time. I tried to learn trick shots when I was 10.”

“Well, I am certain I can beat you. So, it’s time for a rematch. But first, drinks. What would you like my dear?” He had me so at ease tonight. I hadn’t felt this relaxed in so long.

“I’ll have a beer. That blonde craft beer I was drinking Sunday. Get me one of those.”

“The one that had the high alcohol content.” I nodded excitedly. I’d had two drinks Sunday night and had a buzz. By the end of the third, I was in fits of giggles and a bit of a happy drunk. “Oh, you’re going to be fun tonight. I’ll be right back.” Jeremy headed to the bar while I sat down on one of the barstools. I pulled my cell phone out of my purse and quickly checked it. There were no calls, no texts. It appeared the house hadn’t erupted into flames while I was gone. I’m sure I had emails I could read but there was no point in it. I didn’t want to sit and stare at my phone when I could be staring at Jeremy. Shit. That’s not what I meant. Nope, it actually was.

“Your beer, my dear.”

“Thank you.” I took a drink of it and relaxed into the familiar flavor. “So, rematch huh? I’ll be nice and even let you break.”

“How kind of you, smartass.” Jeremy set the table and started our game. We’d developed a playful banter in moments like this. A little smack talk mixed with a lot of flirtation. “I can’t believe you fucking beat me again.”

“What can I say? I’m unstoppable.” I’d sat back down at the table after the third game in a row where I’d beat him. Jeremy walked over and stood between my legs while he grabbed his beer and took a drink.

“You are amazing.” I crossed my legs allowing my knee to brush against him. He rested his hand on my thigh. “I know that technically this night was for you to relax. But I am really having a great time.”

“I am too.”

“So Cinderella does that mean I can keep you out past midnight.” He’d already paid our tab here but I sensed that he wanted to find another place for one more drink or maybe two.

“Oh hell no,” I replied laughing. “I have to be up early to prep for all of my visitors.” I glanced down at my watch, it almost 10:30. “In fact, this princess might turn into a pumpkin if we don’t get her home soon. She’s also perhaps a little bit buzzy from her beer.”

“I guess I can take you home then.” He leaned forward, burying his face in my hair beside my ear. “I’d much rather keep you all to myself a little while longer. I have to share you all weekend. I’ve never been all that great at sharing. Just ask my kindergarten teacher.” I giggled a bit. “I love that sound.” The feeling of his breath on my neck sent a shiver up my spine. “You have a beautiful laugh. It complements your beautiful eyes, they sparkle when you laugh.”

“You read a romance novel before you picked me up. Didn’t you?”

“Nope. You just inspire that in me.” He kissed my cheek right by my ear before leaning back and grabbing my hand. “Let’s get you home Cinderella. I can’t have you turning into a pumpkin.” I giggled again as I laced my fingers between his. He walked me to the passenger side of his truck, opening the door and helping me in as he had all evening. When he climbed into the driver's side and headed on the road towards my place he grabbed my hand, intertwining our fingers again. His hand didn’t leave mine until he needed to input the code on the gate.

Once at the house, we hopped out of the truck and he walked me towards the door, his hand in mine again. We stopped right before the steps that went up to the porch. The lights were still on in the main house so I didn’t want to take him up on the porch and risk that my little brother and nanny could see the end of what I was now almost certain was a date. As we stopped he grabbed my other hand.

“Thank you for tonight,” I said. “I had a great time.”

“I did too. I feel like I should be thanking you.”

“For what?”

“Finally deciding you’d run out of excuses as to why I couldn’t take you out tonight.” I looked down at the ground. I had made excuses. “It was well worth the wait though.”

“It definitely was.” He leaned towards me. My eyes closed as he got close enough to kiss me. I could feel his breath when I heard the door open and my eyes shot open. The door quickly shut and I turned to see Savannah hurrying outside barefoot. Jeremy backed away from me.

“I’ve been trying to call you all night,” Savannah said. I reached into my purse and found my phone. No missed calls or texts. “Shit. I accidentally flipped it into airplane mode when we got at the bar and I checked to see if you’d called me. Is everything okay? Are the kids okay?” I went from zero to full-blown panic in a millisecond.

“The kids are fine. Everything is okay." I finally sighed a huge sigh of relief. "But.” Savannah didn’t have a chance to even finish her sentence before the door flew open.

“Charlie, you’re home. FINALLY!” There in the open door stood my sister.

“Frankie, what are you doing here?”

“We decided to surprise you and come out early. Dad got the company plane for us so we didn’t have to drive.” She walked down the stairs and hugged me tightly. “Oh, I’ve missed you so much.”

“I’ve missed you too, Frankie.” I looked and Jeremy and mouthed out ‘sorry’ he just smiled.

“Oh, I’m being rude. I’m Charlie’s older sister, Frankie. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Hi, I’m Jeremy. It’s nice to meet you.” He stuck his hand out expecting a handshake and got a hug instead.

“Sorry, we DeLucas are huggers. I’m so glad to finally put a face with a name. Charlie talks about you constantly.”

“Oh does she now?” I dropped my face into my hands. I can't believe she outted me like that, okay I actually can believe that she did. It was very typical. Filterless Frankie.

“Well, why don’t you two come inside. We’ve found our way into the wine cellar, the kids are all tucked in bed, and the adults are having a good time.”

“I should really get home,” Jeremy said. He knew that I was panicking. This was not how I’d planned for him to meet my family. This is also far from how I wanted tonight to end. I should’ve listened to him and let him take me out for a few more drinks.

“Nonsense. You are coming inside, at least for one drink. You need to meet everyone.” Frankie grabbed Jeremy’s hand and pulled him up the stairs. I looked at Savannah in a state of shock.

“What the fuck is going on?”

“I don’t know. They didn’t warn Tony that they were coming even. They just appeared here. They flew in and had a car service pick them up at the airport. They got here right before the kids would’ve all gone to bed. Breathe deep. You’ll be okay.” I took one deep breath before sprinting up the front stairs into the house where I found my entire family surrounding the island in the kitchen.

“Chucky!” Ryan yelled before pulling me in for a hug. He hadn’t found the wine. He’d found my liquor cabinet and by the smell of his breath, he was drinking Jameson on the rocks.

“Hi, Ry.” I hugged him and whispered in his ear. “Really you couldn’t have warned me about all of you showing up? I thought you were my friend.”

“Your sister threatened me. She wanted to surprise you. Were you on a date?” He raised an eyebrow at me.

“Ugh.” I walked away from him and to my Dad. “Hi, Dad. I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too, Charlie.” I realized that as I was hugging my family Frankie was doing all of the introductions of my family to Jeremy.

“And that’s Charlie, who you clearly know,” she said as I walked over to Mandi.

“I do know Charlie.” I hugged Mandi from behind and whispered in her ear. “Am I allowed to smother Frankie in her sleep for this? I know it was her idea.”

“No smothering her in her sleep. She just missed you and thought an extra day would be nice. Then your Dad offered up the plane and it was done.”

“Jer, what do you want to drink?” Tony asked.

“Whatever is fine,” he answered.

“Chucky, what do you want?”

“Tequila. Now that I know I don’t have to wake up early to finish getting the house ready for all of you I’m going to allow myself to have a little more fun.” Tony ran downstairs and came up with a bottle of tequila. Jeremy took it from him and reached into the cabinet to get two glasses, filled them with ice and tequila before handing me one.

“He knows his way around your kitchen?” Mandi asked quietly.

“Shut it.”

“He’s really attractive.”

“Yes, yes he is.” I took a sip of my drink before jumping up onto the counter since all of the seats in my kitchen were taken.

“So where have you been all night, Charlie?” Frankie asked.

“Jeremy and I went out for dinner. And then I schooled him in pool.” I smiled proudly and took another drink.

“She beat me three times.”

“You’re a glutton for punishment,” Tony said. “You lost to her four times Sunday night.”

“I thought that I could take her. I don’t know why I thought that but I did.”

“Charlie made enough money to come visit us in Boston right after her freshman year of college in one weekend by hustling people at pool. She then hustled her way around Boston.” Ryan laughed recalling what I jokingly referred to as my part-time job my freshman year of college. “She said it was better than the alternative which was playing guitar on a street corner.”

“I wasn’t in the mood to be a busker.”

“The truth is she didn’t need to do any of that. She just liked trying to make me nervous constantly. I blame every single gray hair on my head on Charlie." My Dad shook his head and laughed. It didn't matter how old I was, I'd always be his little girl and a bit of a pain in his ass.

“That doesn’t surprise me in the least bit,” Jeremy said. He walked to where I was sitting and hopped up on the counter next to me.

“So Jeremy, what do you do for a living?” Ryan asked. I started to laugh really loudly as Jeremy answered.

“I’m an actor. I do some producing and music too.”

“Ryan, don’t lie. You were the one crying as we walked out of the theater in the middle of the night after a midnight showing of Infinity War and ranting about how they went a full two hours and forty minutes without a single mention of Hawkeye minus ‘he’s on house arrest.’ You absolutely know what Jeremy does for a living.” Jeremy laughed.

“It took you 10 minutes after the credits rolled to be able to speak!” Ryan retorted. “And you also cried. Tony is the only one that didn’t.”

“He totally did. I was in the middle of you two. You just didn’t hear him crying.”

“Spiderman didn’t want to go!” Tony defended himself and his tears causing the entire room to erupt into laughter.

“I like your family,” Jeremy said as he continued to laugh. “I also can see where you get a bit of your special brand of crazy.”

“It’s just those three,” Frankie interjected in an attempt to pretend that it was her husband and siblings that were weird, not her.

“Oh, I have a feeling you’re the wackiest of them all, Frankie.”

“What has she told you?” she asked.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” I laughed and leaned toward Jeremy, my head resting on his shoulder for barely a second before I realized what I had done and I moved quickly.

“So how long have you two been friends? I was almost positive that Charlie lived here as a recluse minus Savannah until Tony ran away from home.” Ryan was always full of smartassed remarks and questions.

“The girls are best friends,” I answered.

“My daughter Ava and Ellery are in school together. We met on the last day of school when Ava begged me to have her friend over to celebrate the first day of summer. Charlie and Axel came with and that’s the day Tony called in a panic about running away from home so I somehow got roped into helping move him into his place.”

“You volunteered,” I scoffed before reaching for the tequila to pour myself another glass. Jeremy took the bottle from me and filled his up as well.

“You looked like a panicked sister. I imagined what my two look like when I do something stupid so I thought I’d help.”

“Hey! I wasn’t doing something stupid. I was moving in with my sister to help her with her kids,” Tony said.

“Umm, hi. My name is Savannah. I’m the nanny. You’re the dude who shows up in the house every morning and steals my coffee.”

“That’s not surprising. He’s done that for ages,” Mandi said. “I’m determined that I failed at motherhood because he can’t figure out how to work a simple coffee pot. There’s no way he’d know how to work the espresso machine in this house.”

“I’ve figured out the regular coffee pot here. But Savannah and Chuck make better coffee than I do.”

“It’s because I worked at a coffee shop in high school,” Savannah replied. She’d worked at my favorite coffee shop that I frequently used as an ‘office’ when I didn’t want to be in the studio. “And coffee is an entire food group to Charlie so she had to get good at it or she would’ve gone broke a decade ago.”

“True fucking story,” I replied. I scooted back on the counter resting my feet on the end so my knees were raised. “I went broke the first summer that Savannah worked at that coffee shop. The anxious non-mom in me stopped by every morning to check on her.”

“Was that the summer she got her first boyfriend?” Mandi asked.

“Yes. He worked with her and was 2 years older than her. I stalked her for an entire summer because I was terrified that he was going to hurt my little girl. That was when I decided I wasn’t capable of being a mother. The universe clearly laughed at my ideas for the future.” I threw back my glass and took a giant drink. Jeremy rested his hand on my thigh, it wasn’t flirty, it was meant to be comforting.

“The universe didn’t decide this for you, kiddo,” Dad said. “But you were obviously wrong about being incapable of being a mother. A year later and you’re one of the best mothers I know.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

“I have to agree with that,” Jeremy added. “I didn’t know you before but honestly, you’re an incredible mom to those kids. You do everything you can to give them the best life they can have considering everything. You’ve survived a lot of trauma to come out on the other end as a really amazing person. A lot of people wouldn’t have come out on this side of the last year with the grace you have. It shows how strong you are and that you are capable of making it through just about anything life can throw at you.”

“Well said,” Ryan agreed.

“Thank you,” I replied before laying my head on Jeremy’s shoulder. This time I left it there, he moved his arm so it wrapped around my back. “It hasn’t been easy but it would’ve been a hell of a lot harder without you guys. I am lucky to have such a great family and awesome friends.” I took a deep breath trying to keep myself from crying. “So I clearly don’t have the house ready for all of you. I slacked off tonight.”

“For good reason,” Frankie said. “You had dinner plans with Jeremy. You don’t need to worry. I can help you out tomorrow. I thought getting here early might be beneficial because I could help you get everything ready. We can spend the day together.”

“Okay, I’m maybe now not pissed that you showed up unannounced.”

“You were pissed?” Frankie asked.

“You know your sister better than anyone,” Ryan said. “Do you think she is happy that she got home from a date and found her house full of people? She’s probably been sitting over there plotting some form of torture on you because you ruined her night.”

“I didn’t ruin her night. I didn’t ruin your night, did I?” I held my glass to my lips taking a sip while giggling and trying really hard not to look like my sister ruined my night, even though my sister kind of ruined my night. I was also trying not to react to Ryan calling it a date. Though judging by the fact that Jeremy’s arm was still draped around me and pulling me in close to him I would say that it was a date if he was comfortable touching me with my family in the room. “I ruined your night?”

“Not at all,” Jeremy interjected. “I think she was just surprised and I’ve learned in the short time I’ve known her that this woman does not like surprises.”

“No, she does not,” I answered. “I am so glad you’re here but a heads up that you’d be coming would’ve been nice. So that I don’t know, I could’ve made sure I changed the sheets in all of the beds.”

“You did do that,” Savannah said. We did the sheets yesterday. I flipped her off.

“You’re supposed to side with me.” The laughter and obnoxious storytelling between my family continued. It was getting close to 1:30 when I caught Jeremy yawn.

“You’re tired,” I whispered. “You don’t have to stay here with us. I’m going to try and move them towards bed soon. It's way past my bedtime and the kids will all be up at the crack of dawn."

“I’m okay.” He yawned again and I frowned at him. “Okay, I’m tired. I didn’t sleep well last night. Are you sure you don’t need me to stay here tonight?” I found it so sweet that because of my nightmares he was offering to stay with me. It had been a rough few nights but I’d be fine. I had a sneaking suspicion that I’d be sharing my bed with Frankie for part of the night.

“I’m sure. Thank you for offering though. You can just come over tomorrow for dinner.” He jumped down off the counter.

“I hate to be a buzzkill but I’m tired and need to get myself home.”

“Are you okay to drive?” Dad asked.

“Yeah, I quit drinking over an hour ago.”

“She has space just stay here,” Frankie said.

“I’m okay to get home, really.” He turned to me. “Walk out with me, Charlie?” I nodded so he helped me down from the counter. He said goodbyes and pleasantries to all of my family before we headed towards the door. I closed it behind me and he grabbed my hand. “Tonight was even better than I imagined. Your family is hilarious.”

“They are annoying but funny most of the time. They will probably be watching out the windows so we should not stand on the stairs.” Jeremy laughed as he pulled me closer to his truck. Where he’d parked wasn’t completely visible from the living room windows, especially if we positioned ourselves properly.

“Tonight really was wonderful. Thank you for letting me take you out.” He now had both of my hands in his. We were standing and looking into each other’s eyes just as we had before Savannah interrupted us earlier.

“It was exactly what I needed. Honestly, it was one of the best nights I’ve had in a really long time. I’m sorry about Ryan and Frankie. They are nosy. They like to pick on me when it comes to the men in my life.”

“I didn’t mind it. I mean it was a date.” I couldn’t tell if it was a feeling of relief or excitement that he confirmed that it was a date. “I was actually going to end our date with a kiss until Sav rudely interrupted us.”

“I was kind of hoping you were going to.” He unclasped his right hand from mine, pushing hair away from my face before cupping my cheek and bending down to kiss me. It started out slow, sweet and innocent. It didn’t take much for me to open my mouth and deepen the kiss. A kiss that I felt from tips of my toes to the ends of my hair, which were probably badly split. He briefly ended the kiss before I stood on my tiptoes to capture his lips in mine again. “You know you really can stay if you have had too much to drink. I’ve got lots of space.”

“I’m okay,” he said as he laughed, bending down to kiss me again. “I wouldn’t drive if I wasn’t okay.”

“Okay.”

“Was this more that you just wanted me to stay here tonight?” He slid an arm around my waist, his hand resting on the small of my back as he pulled me into him.

“I mean maybe. Like not because I think you should stay here and like have sex with me or something. Or not because of my nightmares, I’ll be okay. I just really like you and don’t really want tonight to end and like making out for a while would be really fun. But sadly our night is having to end because my family fucking blows. They’ve never been great with timing or throwing surprises.”

“It’ll be okay. If you want to sneak out tomorrow you can come spend some time at my house.”

“That sounds nice but I’m sure that Mandi and Frankie have my entire day planned. Probably setting up for guests and girl time.”

“You’ll have a lot of fun with them.”

“I’d probably have more fun with you.” I smiled.

“I won’t deny that.” He bent down to kiss me again. This time as he ended the kiss he rested his forehead against mine. “We need to say goodnight. We both need to sleep. We have a long weekend ahead of us. Tonight was only the beginning.” He bent down to kiss me once more. If this was just the beginning I couldn’t wait to see where the rest of the adventure took us.

*****AUTHOR'S NOTE*****

This chapter was so fun to write. I had a couple of different ideas for where to go with chapter nine and I'm REALLY glad I chose this option. Jeremy and Charlie going on a first date that she wasn't even sure was a date played nicely into where I want the story to head. I also felt that it was important to take a bit of a jump in the story to the anniversary and when Charlie's family and friends were in town. It shows the advancement of their friendship without making the story move too slowly.

The next few chapters will heavily revolve around the Celebration of Life and the influx of people at her home. By no means do I intend to have this section be incredibly heavy, however, death carries that weight no matter how it is approached. But as Charlie has said, she doesn't want this to seem like a sad and depressing funeral. She wants it to honestly be a celebration of two people who meant so much to so many people. Obviously, nothing in Charlie's life ever goes as planned so expect some speed bumps and a disturbance or two in the force.

I do want to say that I honestly have no idea what Jeremy's custody situation is like for his ex. For the premise of this story, I've made him the custodial parent and that his ex-wife has visitation rights. There will obviously be periods of time where Ava is with her mother and Jeremy is alone, much like this chapter. There will also be times where Ellery and Axel go to stay with members of their biological family leaving Charlie without the kids. Complicated families involve complicated custody arrangements. So please remember that this is 100% fictional and made up for the purpose of this story, I don't presume to know what anyone's custody arrangements are like.

I'd love to hear what you think of this chapter and the direction that I'm taking not just the story but the relationship between Charlie and Jeremy. I originally hadn't intended for them to rush into a relationship, if you've read anything else I've written my characters tend to move fast. These two felt like there was more history involved in their lives and baggage that might make them want to move slowly. I also felt that their natural chemistry might make them relax a little where they might not with just anyone else. Their families have naturally melded together so they've spent more time together than most people do as they are building a friendship and relationship.

I did feel like it was also appropriate to add a bit about her family laughing about Jeremy’s job. Only appropriate considering the faceclaims for almost the entire cast are MCU actors. I mean Tony crying about Spidey, come on that provides a laugh.

I'm super excited to get to work on the next chapter. I've come down with some sort of plague. I've got all the body aches, sniffles, coughs, sneezes, throat scratches and earaches you could ever dream of which means my Mom has confined me to my portion of the house so that she doesn't also get the plague. The benefits of being a grown-ass adult living with your Mom is when you feel sick she sometimes is willing to make you soup and let you sleep for a full day or two. As I'm being forced into my little basement studio I'll probably be writing until I see the light at the end of the tunnel. Feel free to keep me motivated. :)

xx. Annie

Also, let’s just all enjoy Chris scaring Lizzy. :) 

[maxgrayarchived]

October Writing Update

October has been a really busy month for me, not just writing wise, and since I’ve rejoined the writeblr community and have become mutuals with a few really awesome writers, I want to start doing monthly updates! Let me know if you want to be on the tag list 💞

[[MORE]]

Fanfiction & NaNoWriMo

All month I’ve been working hard as hell to prepare my fic for NaNoWriMo. It’s a Sanders Sides fic, so if you’re not interested in that, go ahead and skip to the next section.

Here’s the synopsis:

When Virgil is granted the power to control shadows, he decides to use it to protect kids being abused like him. His dad and over enthusiastic boyfriend, Remus, have other ideas. As Virgil slowly finds himself becoming a supervillain and diving deeper into his own anger, Patton, Roman, and Logan make it their responsibilities to stop him.

As you can tell, it’s a superhero au. It’s pretty different from anything I’ve ever written, bc almost all of my fics are high school aus. It also has quite a lot of fight scenes, something I’ve... Never written. It’s a little scary.

There were more than a couple points in outlining this story that I realized how in over my head I am, and questioned whether I’m ready to write such a plot driven story. And honestly, I still don’t really know. But I’m excited to give it a try and I’m really proud of some of the things in this fic.

I’ve worked harder on getting this fic ready than I have worked on anything in years, honestly.

I finished the outline on the 28th, I think. I should technically be giving it a final read through, to check for discrepancies and shit, but... My outline is 119 pages long. I don’t fucking feel like it lmao

Zombies

Rejoining the writeblr community has done a lot for my motivation and excitement, which has thus done a lot for my creativity, which... Decided to manifest itself in the form of zombies.

I’m not complaining.

I’ve had so many zombie apocalypse short story ideas that I’m gonna be creating a collection, mostly just about queer teenagers/young adults surviving in the apocalypse. I’m super excited for the little ideas I have so far!

I also have a new novel idea, which I don’t want to talk about too much because I think the idea is actually really original and cool, and I have an irrational fear that people will steal it. Once I develop the idea more and make it more detailed and in depth, I’ll talk about it some.

It’ll probably read similar to a short story collection, and this is gonna different than anything I’ve ever written before, including the superhero au. I’m gonna have to research proper etiquette for conducting a research study... So if you have any good sources on that, send them my way xD

Short Stories

I also got a couple short story ideas that were more contemporary! I’m not as excited for these, so they’ll be put on the back burner, but it’s honestly just nice getting ideas again.

One of them is about a young transguy starting to open up to the idea of coming out getting advice from a grown-up queer couple, and the other that I’m really excited about is about a young traveller road-tripping to see the beach for the first time and picking up a hitchhiker. Both are young adult.

Before closing this out, I HAVE to thank @writinginslowmotion! If they never reached out to me, I wouldn’t have all these ideas and motivation and general excitement about original ideas again. It means the world that you interact with me and try to make me feel included. I hope I do the same for you! 🖤

[mischiefandspirits]

Iron Legion (12/?)

Never let it be said that Tony Stark ever does things by half. He might have grown up with little family, but he wasn’t about to keep it that way.

Tony Stark was seventeen when his first child was born, and that was just the beginning.

For Masterpost, AO3, and Fanfiction

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Brigid

Tony Stark was thirty-seven when Rescue was born.

Tony climbed into the car and hit the gas. “Jay?”

“Sir?” the AI asked as they sped away from the hospital.

“Let Tori know Christmas is going to be in Tennessee.”

“Right away.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Take away everywhere there’s been a Mandarin attack.”

He glanced through the locations and he froze as he saw one that was both unexplained and nerve-wracking.

Rose Hill, Tennessee.

“That?” he said, pointing at it. He listened to J.A.R.V.I.S. explain with a sinking heart.

“Right, change of plans. Set Tori and the kids up with a vacation far from Tennessee.”

“Not feeling up to a trip to The Volunteer State?”

“I think we’ll take a trip on our own. Maybe it’s time to finally take the kids to Disney World.”

“Creating a flight plan for Tennessee. I have messaged Mrs. Keener and rerouted Master Peter’s flight. Should I reroute Dum-E and U as well?”

“Send them to the Tower. They don’t need to be running around an amusement park. They’ll have more fun bothering Bruce. Wait, Peter? Where’s Nebula?”

“Upstairs, helping Ms. Potts pack.”

Tony was stopped from asking more by the doorbell.

He went upstairs to greet his guest, but their conversation was cut short by luggage falling from the second floor.

“Tony, is somebody there?” Pepper called.

“Yeah, it's Maya Hansen.” He looked over to see her giving a laugh as she realized he did remember her. “Old botanist pal that I used to know, barely.” He spotted Nebula following Pepper down the stairs, another set of luggage in her arms and something occurred to him. He leaned over to Maya and whispered, “Please don't tell me that there is a twelve-year-old kid waiting in the car that I've never met.” He really did have enough of those.”

“He's thirteen.”

Tony’s pretty sure his arc reactor stopped working for half a second.

“No, I need your help.”

Thank god. He glanced to the side with a sigh and caught Nebula’s gaze. She sent him a look and he suddenly remembered the cybernetic enhancements her ears had.

“Right, you need to go,” she said, marching up to them. “Mr. Stark is just about to leave. Call the office. I’m sure F.R.I.D.A.Y. can fit you in sometime after he’s back from vacation.”

Maya snorted. “I read the papers. Frankly, I don't think he'll last the week. This can’t wait.”

“He’ll be fine.”

“I will be fine,” Tony agreed.

“I'm sorry. With Happy in the hospital, I didn't know we were expecting guests,” Pepper said, coming to his side.

“We weren't.”

“She’s just leaving,” Nebula added.

“Nebula, escort her out please,” Tony said before turning to Pepper. “So there’s been a change of plans.”

“Wait -” Maya called, but Nebula grabbed her arm and forced her along.

“What change?”

“Something’s going on in Tennessee that might be connected to the Mandarin so you guys are going to Disney World.”

“Us?”

“Yes.”

“What about you?”

“Well -”

“Oh no, it’s Christmas. You are not doing this.”

“It won’t take long. I’ll meet you before it’s even time to open presents. Pete’s already on his way and Jay sent a message to Tori. Speaking of which, why is Nebula still here?”

“Because you gave a terrorist our address!”

“That’s exactly why she shouldn’t be here! I can’t protect all of you!”

“Maybe you should have thought about that before!”

“I wasn’t thinking before!”

“Clearly!”

“Pep-”

The world exploded.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Freeze!” Tony looked up at the boy standing in the doorway. “Don’t. Move.”

Tony turned to the boy and the kid lowered his potato gun.

“Dad? What are you doing here?”

“What am I doing here? What are you doing here?” Tony huffed. “You, Tori, and Val should be heading to Florida.”

“Mom’s at the diner finishing her shift. We’re leaving in the morning. Didn’t Jay tell you.”

“Jay’s not feeling too good,” he said, glancing over at the armor.

“Woah, that looks bad,” Harley said, walking up to the armor. “Poor guy. What did dad do to you?”

“The house got blown up. I’m fine by the way.”

“Technically, you’re dead.” Harley tossed him a newspaper. “Be glad Mom didn’t see that.”

“A valid point. Thanks, kid. Where’s Val?”

“Inside with Old Molly from next door. I told her I was spending the night in the workshop. You gonna fix him?” Haley asked, moving the helmet around.

“Of course.”

“You know, if you’d let me work on him and War Machine -”

“It’s Iron Patriot now.” Tony still couldn’t believe he’d let Rhodey talk him into letting them rebrand him. This sends a better message. Yeah, a message that Ellis wanted more of Captain America, but better.

“That's way cooler!” Harley gasped.

“You’re disowned.”

The kid just rolled his eyes and turned back to the armor. “Anyways, I would have added in um… the retro…” he trailed off trying to think of the name.

“Retroreflective panels?” Tony offered.

Harley nodded. “To make him a stealth mode.”

“You want a stealth mode?”

“Cool, right?”

“That's actually a good idea. Maybe I'll build one.”

Harley grabbed the gauntlet and a finger broke off. “Oops.”

“Right, leave your brother alone and go get me a few things.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pepper was staring out at the destruction, tears in her eyes and Tony’s helmet in her hands, when Nebula’s head shot up.

“What’s -”

She cut off as she heard a beeping coming from the helmet. They shared a look and Pepper slid the helmet on. When the message was over she took it off and turned to Nebula. “Do you know where he is?”

“Rose Hill.”

That surprised Pepper. “Why’d he go there?”

“I don’t know. Maybe he’s worried about Harley, Aunt Victoria, and Valeria. It’s too dangerous to get on a plane though. This Mandarin could shoot us out of the sky. I’ll get us a car.”

Pepper nodded and turned towards the ambulance. “And I’ll get Hansen. I don’t think it’s a coincidence she showed up right now demanding to speak with Tony.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Harley booked it as soon as the bad guy turned to him, but it wasn’t enough and the man caught him.

“Gotcha, brat,” he snarled grabbing his arm. He tugged him closer with a smirk. “Let’s hope you do a better job at persuading Stark to listen. For your sake.”

BLAM!

The man toppled backwards, shoulder smoking from the bright blue blast that had hit it. Harley turned to see his mom standing in the road, the arc-gun Dad had given her in hand.

“Mom? What are you doing here?”

The glare she shot him had a wild edge and he flinched back. “I don’t know. I mean first your father sends a poorly hidden warning to get out of town, then everyone was talking about Tony Stark’s demise in the diner.” Somewhere nearby, something exploded and Harley hoped Dad wasn’t near it. “And then there’s that! What do you think I’m doing here? The better question is what are you doing here? Why aren’t you at home?”

“Well -”

There was a crunch behind him and Harley spun around, backing away as the bad guy got onto his feet.

Mom leveled her gun at him. “Come any closer and I shoot you in the head, only warning.”

The man snorted and took a step forward. “Listen here you l-”

Mom shot him in the head and he collapsed.

“I warned him,” she muttered, lowering the gun and turning on Harley. “Talk.”

“I was just…” Harley saw Dad shuffling out of the bar he’d went to before, flipping through a folder. “Dad!”

“Your father’s here?” Mom asked, but he was already running forward.

Dad froze, staring at him with wide eyes.

“Dad, are you okay?”

“Stark,” Mom growled low enough not to grab attention while she marched straight passed Harley and grabbed Dad’s shirt with one hand, the gun still in the other. “Why is my son out here in the middle of the night nearly getting abducted?”

“Abducted!?” Dad stared at him with wide eyes, scanning for injuries.

“I’m fine. Mom shot the guy.”

“You’re supposed to be on your way home.”

Mom rolled her eyes. “Stark, how have you not realized children don’t listen? You have three kids!”

“Seven,” Dad and Harley corrected.

“For the record, J.A.R.V.I.S., U, and Peter are well-behaved children! And Nebula’s never gotten into trouble she couldn’t get herself out of. It’s not my fault Harls apparently takes after Dum-E and Fri.”

“For the record, New York was Peter’s idea,” Harley pointed out before remembering his dad’s freak out last time he brought up the battle. “Wait, I didn’t mean to say New York! Don’t freak out again!”

“Again? What does he mean again?”

“Nothing,” Tony said, looking pale. He put a hand over Harley’s mouth and waved at her with the folder. “I’d just like to point out that none of this would have happened if you were on your way to Florida like you were supposed to be.”

“I’m sorry. Not everyone can just bend to the will of Tony Stark. I know this is a foreign concept to you, but I have a job and I’d like to keep it.”

Fire engine sirens cut through the air and the three turned to look at the nearby burning building.

“I need to go,” Dad said, walking over to the car the bad guy had shown up in.

“We’re not done talking about this!” his mom snapped, pulling Harley out of the road.

“See you in Florida! Kid, keep an eye on you know what!”

They watched him drive off before Mom turned to him. “You have a lot of explaining to do. Let’s start with what you meant by freak out.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Aldrich Killian forced his way into their room and grabbed Pepper by the neck, Nebula was immediately at his side, gun drawn.

“Drop her.”

He turned a smile on her. “Honey, y-”

She shot him in the chest point-blank and he crashed into the room service cart.

“Pepper, Maya, take cover,” she growled, marching up to him as he pulled himself up.

“Wait, he’s -”

“It’s okay, Nebula can handle him,” Pepper said, cutting Maya off.

“You don’t understand!”

Killian made to knock the gun out of her hand and she let him, using the move to grab his wrist and twist his arm behind his back before pinning him to the wall.

“Give up,” she said as he futilely struggled against her strength.

His response was a smirk before his skin lit up a flickering orange underneath her hand.

She raised an eyebrow as she felt her skin began to melt from the heat coming off his own, but didn’t loosen her grip. “If you insist,” she said and clocked him over the head, dropping him when he fell unconscious.

She turned to the other two women. “We need to leave right now.”

“Your hand,” Maya said and Nebula followed her gaze to see the hologram around her limb flickering, having problems calibrating with the missing skin.

“It’s a prosthetic, hidden with holograms. It’ll be fine. Mr. Stark can patch it up when this is over. Grab your things.”

Pepper went to work, closing up her bags, not minding anything she might leave behind. Nebula followed, but Maya stayed standing where she was, staring at Killian in shock. After a moment, Pepper turned to speak to her, but paused when she saw something.

“Nebula!”

She spun around just in time to see an unfamiliar man tossing a chair at her. She tried to brace herself, but didn’t have time and both her and the chair went crashing through the window she’d been standing in front of.

The next thing she knew, she was lying atop a dented car having lost time. Groaning, she pulled herself free of the car and rolled down to the ground. She hissed when her still-healing leg took her weight, but ignored it and shuffled towards the front of the building.

“Rivera, make sure the girl is dead then join us at the airfield,” someone said over a phone and Nebula slid into the tall bushes next to the wall. “Killian, Potts, and Hansen already went on ahead.”

“Yessir,” a woman answered as she turned the corner.

As soon as the call disconnected, Nebula hooked her arm around the woman’s neck and dragged her into the bushes. She unsheathed her repulsor and let Rivera see it before placing it over her chest. “Are you willing to bet that you can regrow a heart or do you want to tell me where your boss took Pepper?”

The woman began to glow orange and Nebula tightened her grip.

“Nice try. Your boss already figured out that doesn’t work.”

Rivera tilted her head up to glare at her and froze, the light going out. “Wh-what are you?”

Nebula blinked, then she realized her arms were darker than they should be. She dragged the woman closer to her and let her voice become metallic and monotone. “Tell me where she is.”

“Miami! They’re in Miami! The boss has a house there!”

Nebula knocked her out like she’d done Killian then walked back over to the dented car and searched the top for her mask. She slipped it on and pulled out her phone, thankful it had been in her front pocket so hadn’t been crushed.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y.,” she said when her sister answered. “Call the police to my location then get me a flight to Miami.”

“On it.”

She hung up then called Peter.

“Nebs! What’s going on? I thought we were going to Harley’s! Why am I in Orlando? Why is no one answering their phones except Fri? She just says there was a change of plans, but won’t tell me anything else! The news is saying dad’s dead! He’s not, right? Please tell me he’s not! I -”

“Peter, calm down. Father’s fine. He’s just dealing with some bad guys. If you’re in Orlando then Harley, Valeria, and Aunt Victoria will be there soon. Just stay in whatever hotel room F.R.I.D.A.Y. or J.A.R.V.I.S. booked for you. Everything’s fine.”

“Okay. You’ll tell me if something bad happens, right?”

“Of course,” she lied.

“Thanks, Nebs.”

“I’ve got to go now,” she said as police cars entered the parking lot. “Be safe and run it by F.R.I.D.A.Y. before you order anything from room service.”

“That was one time!”

She hung up on him and approached the officers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You should've already been gone.”

“I am just beyond terrified.”

“Here it comes.”

BANG! BANG!

Tony blinked and looked to the upper floor as his guards collapsed. “Nebula? What are you doing here?”

“Saving you, clearly,” she said, vaulting over the banister and landing on the lower floor.

His eye twitched. He knew the drop was nothing for her, but that didn’t make him any less nervous every time she did something like that.

Above them, a window shattered as his gauntlet flew in to wrap around his hand.

“I don’t need you to save me,” he said, pulling himself free. “I was doing that myself.”

“I’m also saving Pepper.”

“I was doing that too. It’s all covered.” His boot flew in and he lifted his foot slightly so it could latch on. “Go home.”

She stared at him for a moment then crossed her arms. “Where’s the rest of your suit?”

He glanced over at the window then crossed his own arms. “It’s coming.”

“Uh-huh.” She turned. “Come on, let’s go find Pepper.”

“And here I counted you among the well-behaved children,” he muttered, following her out.

The rest of the suit joined them as they made their way outside.

“Is that Uncle Rhodey?” Nebula asked, looking up, and Tony followed her gaze to see the Iron Patriot flying away.

“It’s his armor, but I’m guessing it’s not him.”

“I’m going to kill Killian,” Nebula growled. “Can you fly?”

Short answer, he couldn’t.

They were making their way towards the main house when he received a call.

“Tony!”

“Rhodey, tell me that was you in the suit!”

“No. You got yours?”

“Um, mm, kind of. Main house, fast as you can. Somebody I’d like you to meet. Also, I’m handling all your tune-ups from now on. That’s twice the airforce chose crackpots to do your upgrades.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nebula stared at the ridiculous amount of suits as they began mowing through the Extremis enhanced army before turning to her father. “We are definitely getting you a therapist.”

Uncle Rhodey and Father turned to her in shock.

“What?”

She pointed at him. “You think Aunt Victoria didn’t tell me that Harley saw you have a panic or anxiety attack? And now this? This is not a healthy coping mechanism.”

“It’s not a coping mechanism at all! It’s -”

“An obsession.”

“Tony,” Uncle Rhodey cut in, setting his hand on Father’s shoulder. “Maybe she’s right. You looked pretty bad when -”

“Oh look, my ride’s here,” Father said as a suit landed behind him and started to wrap around him.

“This isn’t over,” Nebula said.

“I’ll have Fri schedule you in for never.”

“Hey, give me a suit too,” Uncle Rhodey called before he could fly off. He tucked his gun into his waistband and held out his arms.

“Oh, I’m sorry. They’re only coded to me.”

“What’s that mean?”

“I got you covered.” He shut his faceplate and took off.

A moment later, another suit landed next to them. “Good evening, Colonel. Can I give you a lift?” J.A.R.V.I.S. asked.

“Very funny.”

“Would you like a lift as well?” her brother added, turning to Nebula.

“I’ll walk. Please tell me you’re the only one in there.”

“I am.”

“Thank God. We don’t need any more siblings.”

“Indeed.” He shot off with Uncle Rhodey in his arms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Pepper awoke, her world was orange. Orange and yellow and red. Flames surrounded her and filled her, flickering through her skin in an eerie glow.

“Tony,” she choked out, remembering his face staring down at her with terrified grief.

Shoving aside sheets of metal, she clawed her way out of the flames.

She gasped when she finally made it out and oxygen flooded her lungs. Coughing sent a cloud of smoke and ash out of her mouth until a pain she hadn’t noticed before left her chest.

As she struggled to her feet, she looked around at the destruction surrounding her and swatted embers off the fire-resistant clothing she’d been forced into.

“Tony,” she repeated in a whisper, stumbling forwards.

With every step, she felt her strength returning, so when she finally spotted him sitting on the ground, staring at one of his helmets, she felt stronger than ever.

Then Killian came lurching out of the wreckage in front of him.

The flames that had been licking at her consciousness since she had awakened, threatening to overwhelm her, surged up with her anger. She reached down for a pipe and stomped towards him as he began to monologue for her boyfriend.

She slammed the pipe into his head with enough force to send him flying.

When she came back to herself, she was staring into the face of an explosion, an Iron Man gauntlet on her arm. She could remember everything, but it felt disjointed from her mind.

“Honey?”

She glanced at Tony, then back to the fire. “Oh my God,” she panted heavily, raising her bare hand before dropping it again. “That was really violent.”

She felt the flames licking tamely at her mind and shoved them down as far as they could go.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“How are they doing?”

Pepper looked over to see Nebula walking up to her makeshift hospital bed before turning back to where Tony and Bruce were spewing science at each other.

“Judging by their tones, good. Either that or they’re about to blow something up again.”

“They’re like children,” Nebula chuckled before lowering her voice so Bruce couldn’t overhear. “It’s good that Father is finally making friends that can keep up with him, but at what cost?”

Pepper snorted and lowered her own voice. “Speaking of children, how are the boys?”

“Ecstatic. Last I heard, they’re trying to talk Aunt Victoria and Uncle Rhodey into convincing Father that he needs to build an Avengers-themed amusement park. They’ve already got a list of rides for him to make.”

“Don’t let him hear you. He might just take them up on it,” Pepper laughed and Nebula joined her.

“How is your work going?” the young woman asked, sitting next to her on the bed.

“I’ve got a few psychiatrists I’m checking, but Tony’s being…”

“A brat about it?” Nebula suggested.

“He seems to think he can just talk it out with Bruce after they’re all done and that will be enough. I might have agreed, but after what Harley and Rhodey said about his anxiety attacks, on top of everything else, I really think he needs professional help.”

“As smart as Father is, he’s an absolute idiot when it comes to self-care,” Nebula sighed. She glanced at the two men and asked, “So how much of the Extremis are they planning to take out of you?”

“All of it?” Pepper said, confused.

“Pity. You retaining some of the abilities would have been preferred.”

Pepper shook her head and grabbed her tablet. “I have no desire to be a superhero.”

“Who said anything about superheroes?” She gestured towards herself. “I’m stronger and more durable than normal humans, but I’m not jumping to join the Avengers.”

“You spent the invasion knocking people out and then helped the Hulk take down Loki,” Pepper pointed out.

“Helping is a generous way of putting it, and I was just doing my job as security for the tower. I’m not going to join the Captain’s merry band on their missions any time soon. Having some extra strength and durability in your back pocket doesn’t mean you would even have to use it. It would just be good to have in case of an emergency. Like if you get kidnapped. You wouldn’t have to rely on us.”

Pepper studied the young woman for a moment before her eyes went soft and she took her hand. She didn’t say anything, knowing Nebula was as allergic to emotions as her father could be, but she understood that this was Nebula’s way of saying she had been both worried for Pepper and guilty for failing to protect her.

“I’ll think about it,” she allowed after a moment. “Want to help me sort through the psychiatrists in the meantime?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tony and Pepper watched Peter and Nebula bicker over Mario Kart in the living room of the New York condo they were staying in until the tower’s penthouse was finished. The two were out on the balcony, sharing drinks and enjoying the evening air.

Tony chuckled when Nebula shoved her brother off the couch before turning to Pepper. “You sure about this, Pep? We can still up the dosage.”

She rolled her eyes and took a sip of her wine. “For the last time, yes.” She leaned over and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Nebula and I talked about it and… Tony, I know you’re not going to give Iron Man up completely. You’re probably never going to give it up.”

“I am Iron Man,” he chuckled nervously. He set his glass down on the railing and pulled her into his arms. “Pepperoni -”

She set her finger on his lips. “It’s okay. It’s a part of you. I’m still not comfortable with you endangering yourself like that, but I understand.” Her arms slid around his neck and she pressed their foreheads together. “If knowing I can protect myself makes that easier on you, makes sure you’re focused on coming home to me at the end of the day, then I can deal with running a little hot.” He got a gleam in his eyes and she narrowed hers. “Don-”

“You’re more than a little hot.”

She shook her head and kissed him, Tony eagerly participating.

“They’re busy Nebs! Why can’t you make it!”

They pulled apart at the shout and turned to see Peter at the door to the balcony.

“Hey! You were supposed to pau-” his voice cut off as he closed the door.

The two chuckled and Pepper kissed his cheek again. “We should probably go separate them before we lose the rental deposit.”

“They’ll be fine for a few minutes,” Tony hummed, tugging her closer and pulling a jewelry box out of his pocket.

She opened it to find a beautiful necklace sitting inside, silver with a heart-shaped garnet pendant that was lined in diamonds and had a small teardrop diamond hanging from the tip. The most noticeable features, though, were the irregularly-shaped pieces of metal embedded into the chain.

“It’s gorgeous,” she said, running a finger up the chain.

“It’s from the heart, literally,” Tony chuckled, tapping his chest.

She looked up at him with a frown, then her eyes widened.

He held up his hands. “They were sanitized. Twice. Promise! I can have the chain replaced if you don’t like it. I just -”

She pushed the box into his hands and turned around, pulling up her hair. “Put it on me?”

He beamed and pulled the necklace out. He let his hands linger after draping it around her neck and clasping it.

She slowly turned back to him and they took each other in.

Something crashed loud enough to be heard through the reasonably soundproof door and they both sighed.

In the living room, they could see Nebula glaring at her brother while she held him up by his ankles.

Tony shook his head and opened the door. “Do you two mind? We were having a moment.”

“Twelve percent of a moment?” Peter asked innocently, not at all perturbed about being upside down.

“Who told you about that? Is Jay selling me out again?”

Pepper chuckled as she watched the family bicker and the warmth that filled her chest had nothing to do with the experimental drug in her veins.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Celtic fire goddess Brigid was a triple goddess. She was the Fire of the Hearth, the Fire of the Forge, and the Fire of Inspiration. A goddess of family and fertility, a patron of the crafts and law and order, and a muse and protector of cultural learning.