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#i can't sort them rn
claratwelve · 9 months
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yeah no okay i just finished s13 and i loved it, that was some good cinema
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somegrumpynerd · 9 months
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Quick doodle just for fun
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abyssalhuntersnerd · 2 months
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It's that time of the year again where I put the fish and Amiya in the washing machine...
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#normal posts#specter and skadi will be next but by themselves#fyi I do this because these fellas sleep with me and this year they built a parking right besides my room#so the dirt and dust has gotten all over my room and my plushies are literally brown... so I have to clean them whether I like it or not#normally you don't need to clean them that often but these really need it and I won't wash them by hand cause#the dust and dirt is just stuck there so :/#I'm not a dirty gal I love keeping my room clean but these mf really got the whole house trashed#and that's not even just my room everywhere in the housr has to be deep cleaned#I have to clean my room but I'm still waiting for my dad to help me put up my ikea skadis... but at this point I'll have to myself so#I guess I'll have to watch yt vids lmao#so sorry for being out of socials I'm honestly just really tired and feel like rn things are pretty chill so my presence isn't needed here#and honestly I'm not legally allowed to talk about what's been going with me because I have some respect and would rather not shame people#online for the sake of it <3#so yeah idk does anyone miss me here hsisjddi cause I miss being here but the energy is just not it#I'm tired but I wished I had more energy for things#sighs#but yeah I will post room stuff since I will be putting some arknights decorations around once I get stuff sorted out#I can't hide that stuff anymore you know#gotta face my fears and honestly? a gift isn't something that the gifter owns it's the gifted and it's okay to be sad about it but#gotta start facing shit and being proud of stuff even if my ak energy is very low because of my personal stuff#anyways sorry for the rant but I kinda just wanted to get it off my chest I know most people won't care and they just want fish but#thanks for reading and making it all the way down here I love you
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bonerot19 · 5 months
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I was wondering, what makes Steph and Jason’s characters different to you?
ooooooh okay I'm gonna be speaking generally here bc most of my Jason and Steph brain is taken up by my au which is obviously not canon-based
I'll start with their similarities, and then get into how I think they diverge
the most obvious similarities are their upbringings/childhoods. both with moms who are addicts, and dads in the criminal world (now, Jason's mom obviously dies and Steph's doesn't. and Steph's dad was a villain and Jason's dad was a 'goon' so there are different degrees to this)
they both grew up in poverty, were both Robin, both died (or, 'died') brutally at the hands of a villain. I think they're both underestimated and mistreated by the other bats
these similarities, though, make for very different characters. I think Steph can be seen as a impulsive, brash, eager to prove herself. she cares deeply and fundamentally wants to do good
Jason, on the other hand is angry, meticulous, pessimistic (but also, so so so secretly hopeful. like, he wouldn't keep coming back to Bruce is he didn't have some hope. he wouldn't do the whole utrh final confrontation if part of him wasn't at least a little bit hopeful it might actually go his way)
I think Steph looks at a fucked up world and thinks she can fix it (restorative justice), even if no one else thinks she can. and she's going to try and do it her way.
Jason looks at a fucked up world and thinks he can control it (preventative measures). like, I think part of his personal philosophy is well, someone has to do it I guess it'll be me since no one else is willing to do what needs to be done.
also Steph is, like, nice. and Jason is, in general, an asshole (affectionate)
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There was a vividness to him, even at rest, that made death and spirits seem foolish.
The Song of Achilles, chapter 5.
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stabbyfoxandrew · 3 months
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you know what's funny is how i break Me into my ocs.
like i got a guy with backpain, one with depression, one with ocd, one with adhd. half of them are autistic and the other half are adhd
and i didn't like do that on purpose because i created them all before i even know what most of that was :'))
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chirpsythismorning · 1 year
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I love it when milkvan accounts have "the superhero and the heart 💜💙" in their bios, like yesss address her by exactly what she doesn't wanna be seen as, and him as how his other love interest standing in the way of milkvan sees him
I can honestly say it's gotten to a point where I feel bad? Like, completely separate from byler obviously, just seeing some of their takes on things, it makes me feel pity almost because their interpretation of what's happening is just so superficial and yet they truly believe it's the most beautiful love story on the planet.
I'm not even the type of byler that hates milkvan tbh. I am a byler that was a milkvan back in the day. Like, I hate to admit this, I hate it so much, but I literally remember rewatching season 2 to prepare for s3's release and I skipped all of s2 practically so I could get to the end to rewatch their reunion! I was that bad!
For those that don't know, s2 was seen as like a big risk from Netflix's perspective, because they were scared that the show would tank since El wasn't with the boys again, specifically Mike, for the entire season. And so I can honestly say, at one point, I contributed to a large sector of fans back then who thought it was the Mike and El show and ended up missing a lot as a result. Though, upon coming across theories post s3 (Mike in front of the closet in Will's room was what opened my eyes officially), I remember rewatching s2 and seeing that shed scene and feeling instantly that it was romantic... And so apparently, all it took was me actually watching it instead of skipping over it to realize....
So that's probably a part of the problem for them still, is that they're watching the milkvan scenes with undivided attention (with rose-tinted goggles), and they're glossing over everything else. Even now, with one season left we still see them downplay Mike and Will's relationship by saying Mike hates Will? And that alone could not make it more obvious that they do not actually watch the show.
Most bylers on the other-hand are capable of watching milkvan scenes, multiple times, like we analyze them to death. And most of us are coming from a good place, genuinely trying to understand these two characters and where they are both coming from. Though, I have yet to see a byler scene be analyzed by milkvans? Like they just don't talk about them beyond downplaying them both romantically and platonically? I'm convinced they've seen every byler scene maybe once bc they were forced to on the first watch but they've avoided their scenes ever since... Not great for their ability to understand the show obviously.
Many of them do in fact view that first meeting in the woods as like them falling in love at first sight. And genuinely, A LOT of people got hooked on Stranger Things in the first place because of Mike and El and them sort of viewing all of their interactions as irrefutably romantic.
And that isn't inherently bad! It's not! But now when you add Will in the mix, you start to see the hypocrisy seep in through the cracks. And it's because by comparison, they view fans merely speculating about Mike's potential feelings for Will as something to be seen as perverted or gross. And so that for me, is when I sort of start to question the groundwork of milkvan.
Because quite frankly, I didn't see any of these people getting angry and defensive about how gross 99% of the audience was for shipping Mike and El in s1-2. As far as I can remember, the show was a hit in large part because it followed this very successful trope of self insert nerdy boy meets girl who is way more 'cool' than him, and people ate that shit up bc we always do. It's what we're used to. It's safe. From what I recall, no one had any problem with Mike trying to kiss El in his basement bathroom after like 3 days of knowing her, during a very traumatic time in their lives and only specifically after Lucas implied Mike was already in love with her and wanted to marry her at this point.
They saw that and said, that's love bitch.
And bylers say this all the time, but it is absolutely true: If the roles were reversed, if El was the best friend of Mike's who went missing and instead Will was a boy they found in the woods while looking for her, fans would have been saying this is obviously a best friends to lovers story between Mike and El!!!.. And that bathroom scene? If that happened between Mike and Will? They would have saw that and said what the fuck kind of sick shit is this.? And maybe it would have been in large part because the circumstances at play, bc it doesn't really matter to me personally when it comes to that situation whether it was a girl and a boy or a boy and a boy, it was an odd choice to make, plain and simple. And that's what I'm trying to say here. That to them, one is true love, and one is disturbing.
Mike's known Will longer. If he is queer (he is), then it's very likely he did have a crush on Will at the time he met El, not necessarily super consciously or anything. But even despite that, I don't think Mike would have felt comfortable with kissing Will in that situation, nor any other boy or girl. They prove this when Mike's makes that comment in s2, chastising Dustin and Lucas for merely being interested in getting to know Max, despite never having spoken a word to her? Like that tells you right there the circumstances and everything at play is what led Mike to try to kiss El in that moment, a moment that was unprecedented and never would have happened in any other scenario.
Even in the case they found Will in the woods instead of El, I don't even think that scene would have happened either? And this is because the whole point of it was for El to ask Mike if she was still pretty despite having a buzz cut (looking like a boy like everyone in the story has been hinting at us that entire season), for Mike to say pretty, really pretty, only for him to look visibly uncomfortable with himself, followed by trying to overcorrect this moment by kissing her.
That scene wouldn't make sense with Mike and Will bc it was happening in the first place because of heteronormativity. And it existing and people thinking it's like peak romance, is in and of itself proving the hypocrisy of an audience that is eventually going to call Will and Mike ending up together, coming out of nowhere and perverted...
Bc you just know if El was Mike's best friend, they never would have had any interest in Will as this boy they found with superpowers. They would have got those scenes of Mike looking everywhere for El and instantly latched onto the boy/girl slow-burn best friends to lovers trope.
The crazy together scene???? If that scene was between Mike and his best friend El, fans would have been rooting for it to end in a kiss... Why do you think the Duffers had that awkward long pause at the end? They were nodding to the fact that this audience is willing to see one thing, but not the other. Even when the thing they're willing to see is overcast by things that should make you a little bit more critical of it in the first place.
Putting Will or any other boy in El's place in that scene in the bathroom or other moments between Mike and El in s1 would have completely removed the romantic lens for most of the audience back then, and it's because... wait for it... HETERONORMATIVITY!
We as a society see a boy and a girl being nice to each other and pressure them to make it official. Hell no a boy and a girl can't just close friends. Either one of them is harboring secret feelings or one of them is gay.
Heteronormativity is literally why most of society latched onto these 2 characters, not necessarily the pieces that made up the whole. And so they have to make up excuses despite the circumstances bc it is so normalized that they don't think twice about it, because they've never had to think twice about it up to this point.
Stories have always catered to them. In fact, the stories we've been exposed to our whole lives has created the expectations we have in the first place.
And so like... I do feel bad but only bc I'm a decent person and don't like to see people hurting genuinely.
No doubt I will feel satisfaction seeing some folks who were hurtful to bylers get a taste of their own medicine, but I genuinely hope that they can eventually learn to accept it and appreciate the story for what the Duffers intend it to be when it's all said and done.
As for the superhero and the heart... again, I feel bad like genuinely, I don't know how to even explain the unnecessary guilt I feel that these strangers who I don't even know are going to be whiplashed tf out of next season...
#stranger things#anti milkvan#sorry that i sort of went off on a tangent#i just don't feel like i'm the type of byler to hate milkvan?#maybe it's bc ive reached a point where i feel zero threat to like byler or whatever?#but that's the thing#it's not even about shipping byler and like wanting them to be together#i've just been along for the ride this whole time and going along with what's presented#and byler is obvious to me based on the evidence#and so i like talking about it and analyzing it bc there is so much to still discover#if byler didn't happen i wouldn't like be heartbroken#i would just be like 100% genuinely confused#bc i'm not here bc i'm like queerbaited constantly#i'm here bc i like tv shows and movies and get fixated on ones that are smart and interesting every other year#and st is the fixation rn#and byler is like the life and blood atp#bc there's just soooooooo much!#hopefully milkvans will allow themselves to rewatch byler scenes finally post s5...#bc you just know most of them can't bc it makes it near impossible to convince themselves milkvan is superior...#like... it's obvious the show doesn't want you to feel that way by the end of s4#so...#but it's inevitable they'll have to choose between being bitter forever or just simply accepting it and appreciating it for what it is#i wish them all well#besides like genuine homophobes who are pieces of shit#i look forward to them saying this was fanservice or last minute or something#that will be... peak entertainment
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catboyfurina · 1 year
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focalette / neuvalors whatever the ship name is orz
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#beeep#gi#query#i am a trans guy furina truther and i think a lot of fanon neuvalors is really focused on a sort of. somewhat misogynistic (imo) stereotype#idk a lot of fanon seems to really like Big Strong Protector Man and Hysterical Little Emotional Woman#and thaaats not up my alley BUT I SHALL ELABORATE ON WHAT IS !#first of all. i think both of them have feelings and emotions and shit. when fanon is like here are fontaines crybabies that fanon is like#yea. you get it this time#i think furina is really invested in pretending to be who he thinks fontaine wants as an archon#and i think part of that is pretending to be a cis woman. and i think that is also why he's so dramatic and over the top in part#fontaine wants a spectacle so he gives them a spectacle but (as seen by the fountain) does hide the less entertaining side#(or the side that he can't bear to let become entertainment)#and i think he doesn't and or can't hide as much of that from neuvillette#i think when theyre both tired and alone furina can drop the exaggeration . and that. that specifically is soooooo#and tying into the trans headcanon i think nvl is the only one who knows#i still dont think furina has said everything but like. neuvillette being the only one past that first incredibly high wall. yeag#and neuvillette is imo one of those people that likes ppl that are annoying (cough cough just like me fr fr rn)#buuuuut ngl i havent thought as hard about neuvis end of it#...i dont think theyd be together currently in canon tho this is one of those slowburn bait things#also. i don't think furinas a kid pensive emoji. i know its popular on like half the fandom but nnnot my headcanon#i dont think hes acting childish in a child way i think hes acting childish in a clown way#.....hopefully this isnt my sinister!baizhu headcanon moment that ages soooo poorly ahdsjfjshsgh
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byanyan · 8 months
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byan wearing cute lil pink ribbons in their hair
byan wearing cute lil pink ribbons in their hair while they shout the nastiest string of profanity and just fuckin deck some guy square in the face
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gxtzeizm · 1 month
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nothing else to say but absolutely gutted for dato' jijoe :((((((( 💔💔💔
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necrotic-nightshade · 3 months
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I can't tell if it makes me feel better or worse that I wasn't the only person who was failed and fucked over by the administration of my old school.
I'm glad I dropped out. And I'm glad I can finally say I was right about those cunts.
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raksh-writes · 4 months
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Oh my god, I just got hit with Such a hardcore urge to do a fresh reinstall of Skyrim and rebuild my mod list from the ground up that it's making it Impossible to focus on anything else and I was supposed to be writing a paper for one of my uni classes today, like why, brain??? Why NOW??? 😭😭
Feels like Im not gonna be able to get my hands on anything else until I do it and it might as well take the whole day ahhhhowpghhiulaergnilaengnalg the fuck is this, help 😭😭
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faethfigueroth · 5 months
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#alright these tags are super embarrassing but i needed to rant publicly so uh. you can read this but please don't perceive me too much#it is so fucking exhausting having nobody to share my life with#i have literally zero friends at this point bc ever since my grandpa died i've pretty much stopped trying to keep in touch with my hometown#friends and i cut off my 'friend' group that were racist assholes who treated me like a doormat back in october and haven't really made any#close friends at college since. and i just fucking hate that this is the same way i've felt for so many fucking years like you'd think it#would be bearable at this point and i'd be used to being alone and for a while i honestly was but it just hit me tonight how fucking lonely#i am and how tomorrow i have to keep on just doing the shit i have to do in life without anyone to talk to and share it with#other than my mom who's been pissing me off lately so i've been pushing her away too!#it's so tiring to have to go out and do things and have responsibilities everyday and not being able to share that with anyone idk it makes#it feel almost like i'm carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders which is SO dramatic i know#like today i wanted to talk about the stupid false alarm gas leak thing with my sort of friends in this club i'm in but i didn't get to talk#to anyone at the meeting bc everyone was just talking amongst themselves in their little groups of best friends and it just reminded me that#i don't have that and i've never fucking had that i've only ever pretended i had that#it's like all these years i've been pretending to be a person that has friends and knows how to live life normally but i never have#more than anything i just miss my friends from home bc they're the closest i've ever felt to having friends that are like family but. i#don't know how to talk to them anymore. i didn't tell any of them when my grandpa died and i think they just assumed that i've moved on so#they've probably moved on and i already know that they have their own lives and friends at their schools that are a lot more full than mine#wanna know the worst part about all of this? i just had therapy and basically told her everything's fine#and i won't meet with her again until 3 weeks from now so literally the only person i can talk to about this right now is my mom#which i am absolutely not gonna do bc she's gonna get so scared and worried for me and i can't have that rn#anyways yeah. this isn't even that big of a deal like i haven't had friends for at least the past 6 months it's not like anything's changed#i just feel extra sad about it right now. i need a distraction stat gonna go watch watch some tv goodnight#shut up hanna
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eepybubble · 1 year
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i think when i'm at home i don't really mask bc my family is equally as weird as me so i can basically do whatever shit i want
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iridescentis · 5 months
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sickening that i have to think about studying rather than 50 different fic ideas floating in my head tomorrow this should be considered a crime
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serkonans · 7 months
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the way we handle medical leave in the states even for people with good benefits is cruel
#the number of hoops i have to jump through. the way that my requirements for one surgery are apparently different from another surgery#even though there's nothing in the paperwork to indicate any need for that and the surgeries don't differ all that much#the way that they lost my initial letter and now i'm up against my deadline next week and they haven't even told me what day next week#so i'm worried that it's literally tomorrow#the way i am not receiving ANY pay for an entire month because of all the delays so i'm having to live off my savings#the way that every single person i've talked to has said something different about what is and isn't required#the way that for a lot of this i had to be navigating it while high on painkillers immediately post-surgery#the way that the group my employer contracts through has two different emails and names and flips between them constantly#the way that my healthcare provider does it differently than every other healthcare provider so i need special forms from them#instead of the leave group but then the leave group doesn't seem to accept the forms that they send#the way that the doctors office has seemed incredibly confused by my requests#the way that the ROI office told me they'd send over a completed form and never did#the way i literally don't even know who to call next to try and sort this out or if it's possible TO sort out#like i guess i'll call the leave group tomorrow and cry and beg for an extension. i guess i'll grovel bc it's the difference#of getting a few thousand dollars or not and i can't just be like oh well guess i won't get my short term disability pay#especially bc none of the hospitals have billed me yet and i'm getting scared bc i don't know what my ER bill is going to look like#bc they did xrays and a CT scan and they gave me a splint and a sling and a lot of drugs#so i do need the money. just sitting here like. idek what to do lmfao.#not tagging this bc i'm on desktop and i can't do the accent mark easily and idk where my phone is rn sorry
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