#i cannot find peace istg | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

go-to-the-mirror · 2 years

Text

March, 2023

I MEANT TO DRAW SOMETHING HHHH

Istg, if the only art I make for this whole relisten is for fatigue I'm gonna cry.

Anyway, 152 time!! I love 152, I love Jon and Helen, I love the parallels, I'm excited, ohhh this is so cool we're heading to like fantastic episode WAY TOO MANY NOTES ones really quickly (too quickly, i want to draw something for 160) and yeah! Yeah! Oh god it's almost season 5.

Below is a mixture of amazing words - mostly Jonny's /j (i have some as well) - and rambling. I love this statement so. much. now.

@a-mag-a-day!!!

I'm putting a content warning for I think it's unreality, cause I talk a bit about... not being able to trust yourself, and that could be... not grand for some people.

Statement of Hezekiah Wakely, regarding his career as a gravedigger. Compiled from a series of letters to Nathaniel Beale between 1837 and 1839. Audio recording by Jonathan Sims, the Archivist.

Who's Nathaniel Beale? I feel like I've seen his name before. Unless, of course, it's another Michael situation. There's... Nathaniel Thorp and Nathaniel Lukas. Hmm.

I’ve been installed here some weeks now, and I’m finding myself well-contented, my sexton duties keeping my time employed such as I scarce have a chance to allow myself those dark thoughts that so concerned you when last we visited.

What thoughts, I wonder. It probably mentions it further along, but I haven't really paid attention to this statement enough to be sure. For a while I thought it was "A Gravedigger's Entry".

The Lord gave him that voice for a purpose, no doubt – but sometimes that purpose does feel like it might be providing me a few minutes of unearned slumber

Hehe

My troubled sleep, on the other hand, has not, of yet, resolved itself in any way to my satisfaction. I work myself to exhaustion, cleaning, polishing and looking after the church proper, and I tell you, when I lie abed I can scarce rise again for the weakness I leave myself in. And yet, sleep still eludes me.

Heh, real. I too cannot sleep.

I’ve never quite known a rest like it. Perhaps it is the harder, more physical aspect of the task, or perhaps the quiet rhythm of it. There’s no echo as there is in the church, just the sound of pick and shovel hitting dirt. And when it’s deep enough, when you stand at the bottom, the noise of the world just… fades away to nothing. It is the sort of quiet that makes you feel as though the commotion and hubbub of life were but a terrible dream, and in sleeping you were waking up to peace.

BLANKETS ARE NOT ENOUGH I NEED TO BE BURIED ALIVE

That just sounds so?? Nice??? HHhnhnmhn

There is such peace in the churchyard, you see: to walk atop the soil knowing that, deep below my feet, those blessed souls wait happy and silent in the cool, damp earth, counting the days until the Resurrection. It gives me such warmth to think of that I have taken to spending much of my unoccupied time wandering the graves, and, where the mood allows me, taking my sleep there.

That is creepy, but like... I mean... I can understand it? It's nice to be outside in nights that aren't too cold, it's nice to sleep under the stars, the creepy part is the fact that it's a graveyard, but that can be brushed aside.

But I do long for that rest. I tell myself I wake each day renewed, but I am never as truly satisfied as when I’m in my slumber, and insensible to the world.

This statement is making me want to go to sleep and/or be buried in the dirt.

I do find, however, that when I dig my graves, I have been going deeper. And at times, I worry I might dig so far as I can no longer get out with my meager ladder. Now, those moments – you must not cast judgment on me for this, Nathaniel, for it is simply a passing fancy – but I will often lie myself down on that soft earth, and I will sleep. And I swear to you that the sleep I find there is more blissful than any I have ever found.

A Gravedigger's Envy? He's getting the nice grave sleep, I want the nice grave sleep, how is Jonny making grave sleep sound so appealing?

At least until a few feet down. But by the end of it… oh, I tell you there was warmth in that grave. Whether by my own body or the heat of the soil, I couldn’t say, but it was as comfortable as the fireplace of a public house, and the wind could not reach me in the hole that I had made.

I want that, I really want the grave sleep, that sounds so nice.

I had a dream, then. I dreamt a rain had come. A terrible bitter rain that chilled my bones and turned the soil around me dark and sodden. The walls grew damp and slippery, their firm shape lost as they began to slip and crumble. And then all at once they collapsed, the grave filling in a moment with a wave of mud and wet dirt. In a single terrible moment of utter terror, it was atop and around me, covering my face and filling my lungs with its awful choking sod. And the strangest thing was that it was wonderful. I had never felt such safety as within the crushing weight of earth all around me, the pressing embrace of the buried. In that instant I knew what it was to be dead, and I ached with envy for them.

Ok, hi, I saw a post, and I was thinking about the post, and I'm going to make a vague rebuttal (friendly-like, because they had good points). Hezekiah was afraid before the walls crashed around him. He was not afraid of some other terror, he was afraid of being buried - in the dead way or the forever deep below creation way... I don't know. Seems to be both, fear soup, remember.

The dreamers that have no idea what Smirke's fourteen is, or the supernatural, still affect the dream. Hezekiah associates being buried with being dead, and therefore the fears affect him as if being buried and being dead were similar things. I'm guessing quite a lot of people fear destruction and associate that with their fear of fire. Spiders and control for the aesthetic and also little bug guys fear being trapped when they're in a spider's web. People fear judgement when they're being looked at. (Speaking of, I swear at the shops today everyone was looking at me, like I saw them look at me, I felt their eyes on me, I associated this with the fear of judgement, and was appropriately spooked. What is this, episode 188 of The Magnus Archives?)

Anyway, back to this, Hezekiah's fear transformed into what Hezekiah became. Similarly, Martin - he was afraid of being alone, abandoned, and afraid of being found out. He became an "avatar" of The Lonely and The Eye. Also, would Martin's fear of being alone and being judged overlap, or feel similar? Is this why he gets both?

Mike was afraid of the part of The Twisting Deceit (The Spiral) that chased him, but he also had encounters with The Vast before Ex Altiora, he was afraid of the unfathomable power of that which chased him, he said that the form it took belonged to The Vast, the way he describes the pain of being struck by lightning - how it is so painful that to try to measure it is impossible. That's all pretty Vast-y to me.

Jane... Jane was afraid of the Hive. She didn't want it, she was afraid, she went to it... sure, she was lonely, but looking at her statement, how much of it is the Hive - if we're separating the two - and how much is Lonely? She talks of picking at her skin, of worms that emerged from the ground after rain, of an itch that called her to the attic, to the wasp's nest.

Sure, something chased them to becoming an Avatar, but I wouldn't go so far as to say it's "another fear" both because fear soup and because... a lot of their stories are about being repulsed and terrified by something, but getting so caught up in it that you forget that person who was scared, and you hurt others just how you've been hurt. Cycle of violence, babyyyy!

For an example, let's grab Peter and Martin. Peter's from the family of... basically a cult? Sure, he doesn't seem too bothered by it, but humans are social animals, and he was neglected for his whole childhood, that fucks people up @ the person who said yea Peter's childhood was actually fine. Then he becomes an avatar of the Forsaken and manipulates Martin into becoming an avatar of The Lonely in turn, who then - in the Eyepocolypse - hurts people in his domain. It's not one to one, but no analogies are.

I’ve been thinking, Nathaniel, of funerals and bodies. Souls that escape leaving this common clay to become one again with a truer clay. Were we not created from mud? And it seems more fitting to me that we should return forever to that mud, not pulled from it by some would-be Redeemer, or lifted to sing hosannas in his holy court. I’ve worked so long, so hard. Do I not deserve a rest in the mud from which I came? Commit my body to the earth and let it stay there. I’d do the same for you. For worship of the Most High - though it may be earned, perhaps, by He that made the heavens and the earth - well, to my mind, all that prayer still sounds a lot like work.

The difference between this and the beginning. Speedrunning his decent, as it were. The difference between envying the dead, and their rest before they go to Heaven, to wishing that when he leaves the world he stays in the ground. Hmmmm!!

But He is the son of God and we are merely sons of the dirt. We are not as strong as He is, and we deserve rest. We deserve to sleep.

The Buried oft represents being metaphorically under pressure, as Hezekiah is. He wishes to be Buried to finally rest from his work. That's interesting to me.

Also, feels sort of Flesh-y, but in a way where it's like... yes, soup, is not the fear of being one and the same as animals, as already being dead, as being from the earth and knowing one day you shall return all part of the same thing? Is that not a similar fear? Feels like one to me. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, that's about death, that's about the earth, are they not one and the same? We all come from the same earthen roots, people, animals, plants, everything, we are the same, and we will die the same.

I’ve been trying to sleep, but that bell kept ringing, the one over Jacob the baker’s grave. That nonsense safety valve the Reverend insisted on putting there, ringing and ringing, and disturbing the sleep of everyone in the churchyard. I’ve no doubt it disturbed Jacob as well, who worked so hard all his life and never thought to complain of his lot. He deserved to rest. So I cut the cord. And now he is quiet.

Oh, lord, he buried Jacob alive.

But I can see why he did it. He fears being away from the earth, he fears not being able to die, and so he sees it as saving Jacob and I understand that, I can understand that in his position, robbed of restful sleep, the grave being the only place where he can find his rest that he would do this.

I think this statement has just achieved the rank of "one of my favourites," because... that line. "He deserved to rest. So I cut the cord. And now he is quiet."

But worry not, Nathaniel. The love I bear you will not let me leave you ignorant. As I did with the Reverend, I will come and I will show you, once and forever, the true and glorious peace of the Buried.

Wow. Just... wow.

Nathaniel Beale is buried on the grounds of St. Peter’s Church in his hometown of Dunstable. And I am only the third person to know that in almost 200 years, after Nathaniel Beale himself, and Mr. Wakeley, the person who buried him.

Hey, we're still getting post-statement spookiness, but because everyone's just stopped doing work it's with Jon's eye spookiness.

I... wow.

I cannot tell how much of the change that comes over someone when they are taken by one of the Fears is a direct product of their influence, and how much is their own mind, desperately contorting itself to accept and justify the awful things they find themselves drawn to doing.

I have a really good quote that ties in with this, but it's only in the deluxe transcript of Hive (patreon exclusive transcripts that have Jon's notes and are canon, the Hive one is the most emotionally ruining of the ones out (1 - 33 as of 22/03/2023) so far), but I will say that his attitude towards them has changed significantly as he's... become one.

He called Jane Prentiss "the entity formerly known as Jane Prentiss" and now... hm...

It's interesting how his understanding or conception of avatars and the like changing over the seasons, and although season 4 doesn't have a lot of other avatar interactions... Jon's whole humanity thing, it's enough to make it my favourite season when it comes to this stuff.

I have read many statements now by those who are changing, who are becoming – something else, and few if any of them seem… entirely rational. Entirely the people that they were before.

GIDDY LEG WIGGLE LIKE HHJNNHNHEHN!!! Humanity and identity and monsterhood and trauma!!! The THEMES of this podded cast, I'm love, I'm love!

But how can I tell, I suppose. My job is to view people at their lowest, their most fearful and unstable moments. Perhaps there is less change there than I imagine. Certainly, I don’t feel different. I have no desire for pseudo-religious philosophizing, or delighting in the suffering of those I harm. Then again, I suppose I’m hardly in the best position to judge. Perhaps to anyone listening to these tapes I sound remarkably similar to Hezekiah. Or to Manuela. Or to Jane.

So, I talked about this to my (middlest) sister because sometimes when you're this excited about things you just have to talk to people, like actually talk, and I had some pretty good thoughts about rationality, about if you can know if you're a monster. If you're slipping and you can't trust your mind anymore, how can you trust your mind enough to know that you can't trust your mind? It's just, how can you know you're so far gone, if you can't trust you, then you can't trust trusting you, therefore you can never truly trust yourself, can you? Everything is your perception, and you will never know if you can trust that. You will only know that you can't.

I just think that it's very neat, the whole... everything, all of this, it's just really cool, like how would Hezekiah know he's wrong to be responsible for the death of Jacob, for the Reverend, for Nathaniel? Does he? How does Jon know if he's just like Hezekiah, how can you truly know yourself - or understand yourself? Oh boy, this is such a cool statement and post statement.

HELEN Hello, John. Been a while since you’ve been down here. ARCHIVIST (Impatient noise) I didn’t come here to see you. HELEN Oh, come now! I’m sure I’m more interesting company than the late Jane Prentiss. ARCHIVIST It’s all that’s left of her now – apart from a jar of ashes in my desk. Just a circle of rotten stone on an otherwise-unremarkable wall.

Is the circle of stone a mirror? Is the jar of ashes as much a part of you as your rib? What was she trying to achieve, you wondered so long ago and now you have the answer and you still don't know why... why she listened to the song in her dreams, why she scratched the itch, but then again, why did you?

HELEN (Cont.) Ah… But that’s not why you’re here, is it? ARCHIVIST Yeah. I’ve been thinking a lot about Jane. She was the first, you know. The first I actually encountered like… like us. She seemed so… inhuman. Like everything she used to be was stripped away. HELEN And now…? ARCHIVIST I wonder how much of her was still in there. How much did she choose to be what she was? I read her statement, she was… (inhale, exhale) she was scared. I assumed she’d been possessed completely against her will, but now I’m not even sure that’s possible. HELEN It is astounding the sort of thing you’re willing to choose – given an unpleasant enough alternative – isn’t it? ARCHIVIST How much of willpower is just – safety? “Comfort” by another name. The option to choose and be fine.

THEMES OF CHOICE AND HOW MUCH YOU'RE AFFORDED!!! God, I love this so much! I love how Jane Prentiss, our and Jon's conception of Jane Prentiss changes from season 1 to season 4. How it starts with her as an inhuman enemy, no longer the person she was, and changes to be... what was she, why did she chose this, who was she, she's humanised as Jon becomes a monster, knows her. Understands her.

She was scared.

Good lord.

And then Jon's line, "How much of willpower is just - safety. Comfort by another name. The option to choose and be fine." and that choice isn't really afforded to them, it's always these hard choices with one option that's like "at least you don't die", or live in fear, or whatever. The option to choose and be fine.

Themes. So many themes, I love this bloody podcast.

HELEN Hungry, are we? ARCHIVIST (Angrily) That’s not – – I haven’t done anything – HELEN – yet. ARCHIVIST (Roughly) I feel like if I don’t… I might die. Fade away into nothing. HELEN … Do you… Know that? ARCHIVIST No. But I… (frustrated noise) I can’t die. They need me. HELEN Come on, Jon, no excuses. (The Archivist sighs.) HELEN (Cont.) They don’t need your protection.

I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY, JUST PODDED CAST!!

ARCHIVIST When does it stop? HELEN (Impatient) What? ARCHIVIST The guilt. The misery. All the others I’ve met, they’ve been – cold, cruel. They’ve enjoyed what they do. When does the Eye (inhale) make me monstrous? (Helen laughs.) HELEN What – why would it ever do that? ARCHIVIST I don’t… HELEN When has your guilt, or your sadness, or your handwringing ever actually stopped you from doing what it wants? ARCHIVIST (Stammering) I-I – I have not been taking statements – HELEN You’ve sworn of other people’s trauma for now because you’re caught. Because continuing would endanger you. But other than that, when has your discomfort ever actually stopped you walking the path of the Beholding? ARCHIVIST I… I don’t know… HELEN Even if it were capable of doing so, what possible reason would the Eye have to change how you feel, when it makes no difference to your actions? Helen was like you, at first. She felt such guilt over taking people. Until one day she realized she wasn’t going to stop doing it. So she chose to stop feeling guilty.

OK FIRST OF ALL SOMETHING I CAN DEAL WITH, SIMILARITIES AND DIFFERENCES BETWEEN JON AND HELEN! Helen went to Jon for help with the guilt, and Jon turned her away because he was scared of what he was becoming. Jon asks Helen when the Eye makes him monstrous and she says no, it's not the Eye that'll do that, it's you. You have to decide to stop feelings guilty about the monstrous things you're doing.

Secondly, *gestures* yeah fr fr! I don't even... I just need to listen to this over and over and have it burned into my mind please :3.

Yeah, well, wow! Yeah! For real for real, this is just like 111, I'm discovering a new love for this statement, I need to make a new "holy shit tma" playlist because. Wow. Wow! Mhm hm! WOw!!! Uhh, well, uhm.

Your most humble servant,

landscaping-your-mind

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eureka-its-zico · 1 year

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I'm at a loss for words after the newest chapter... Some gifs should sum up some of my feelings (essay after the gifs lol):

While I am writing this, I hope that I will manage to compose myself 😂 [I came to add this before sending this, and no, I in fact, did not compose myself by the end of this lol]

First of all, thank you for beefy chapters. I personally enjoy them, means I can read a lot more and experience more emotionally. However, please take care of yourself and don't push yourself to churn out big chapters if you don't feel like it. Any sort of update you come out with, know that I will enjoy it and cherish it with my whole heart ❤

Second of all, to reply to the last ask I sent... My fave character from BG3 was Karlach. Honestly, I somehow managed to romance Wyll and then immediately regretted it because Karlach is the best character in that game. My least favourite character was, is and will forever be Gale. I won't go into details because you will see it (if you haven't yet) 😂 And you mentioned Dragon Age and Mass Effect?? Excuse me? Those are like both in my top favourite games! Screaming here in excitement!!!! 😂

Onto this newest chapter... While I was prepared for angst. I was not prepared for ANGST! And while I set the mood with Halsey for the whole chapter, oh shit, my heart 😭 Also, Zoro, seriously? You are such an arse, istg.

Everything, from the first line until the cliffhanger at the end... I am amazed at how you write. It's not just good, it's AMAZING. Each chapter you come out with makes me feel things and believe me, that's hard for me.

[Personal info dump incoming]

Fanfics have been a huge part of my life during some of the darkest times of my life. It's been a safe place for me to go to. Find characters and stories where life is better, someone wants you just as much as you want them if not more. Where you experience those feelings of attraction, that sudden realisation of 'oh shit.' and what comes with it. The fear and excitement of liking someone, the feelings of hurt, disappointment when you miscommunicate or don't communicate enough...

I've been through quite a few awful things in my life in recent years and while I've been free from an extremely toxic person for over a year now, I still feel... broken. Like, I came out from a situation where at the end of it I could not recognise the person in the mirror that was looking back at me. It was bad. And while I am better, there's still this nagging feeling at the back of my head that what if... I won't ever find anyone irl. What if, I will spend the rest of my life by myself?

AND while being alone hasn't been bad and I have learned that my peace is worth A LOT, at the end of the day, it would be nice to share the weight of the world with someone else 🤷‍♀️

[End of personal info dump]

Reading your story. A story you have so much care for. It fills me with so many positive feelings and I cannot even begin to describe how happy I get with each new update and to see you interact with everyone who sends you a message. You are so lovely, I wish I could reach through my monitor and give you the biggest hug ❤

You have a lovely gift. Making people feel emotions with words. Not many people manage to call out to the deepest parts of them, to make them relate and feel with the characters that they are reading about. To experience what the characters feel. And to paint the scenes that it feels you are actually there (in this case, it feels like I watched some bootleg OPLA version because it did not have Doc and Doc needs to be there! Netflix, pls fix this! kthxbye).

Is it obvious that I've been on an emotional rollercoaster tonight? 😂

I am probably going to bite my nails from anticipation for the next chapter because that ending?? I did not see that coming! 😂 But I hope that this will be a good way for Doc to see more about Nami and for them to bond even more. I would love to see a Zoro POV because I want to see him stewing and beating himself up for being a gigantic ass 😤😤😤 I would also expect him to give shit to Doc for pulling this stunt once they do get reunited, but Doc can shut that shit down because the first words out of Zoro's mouth should be "I'm sorry. I've been an ass. I'm terrified. I did not mean what I said." 😂 And Doc blurting out how she feels and Zoro being cold?! That tore my heart out honestly.

Also, Sanji... I can see Doc and him being good friends. Especially since it will annoy the shit out of Zoro and that's fine by me, because he was a dick to Doc 😂 Though also, they already have a good dynamic going for them that will make them good friends (bonding over Zeff/Naan in the previous chapter). Also, Doc doesn't care about his flirting and that is hilarious to me haha

Wow, it's an essay. Again 😂 I apologise, please let me know if you'd prefer that I don't send in essays into your ask? I get carried away because there's so many things that I feel and I just... rant 😂 There's a lot to comment about and I struggle with summing up my thoughts and feelings?! I apologise!

It was a lovely and emotional update and I am looking forward to what next is in store for Doc and the rest of the Straw Hats! ❤ Thank you for sharing your writing, Jenn. I hope you had a lovely weekend and your next week is going to be lovely, great and amazing! Also, 2 weeks until you graduate?! Congratulations!!

-- Your sappy, essay writing, emotional cheesy ❤

Osiyo, Cheesy Darling!!

Disclaimer: I'm going to add a continue reading cut because this is big and beefy and my reply will be equally big and beefy lol.

When it comes to big beefy chapters, it is a habit of mine. I have to like, teach myself to write less in chapters lol but then I HATE is because I feel like I didn't get to explain something the way it should have been explained or a scene between characters doesn't get the attention it deserves. My chapters end up being so long because I am desperately trying to make sure that the scenes, I'm writing all flow together perfectly but then I see it say 15-20k words and I panic lol. Realistically, when you read chapters in books they are at least 10k or more words per chapter. Right? Right??

KARLACH! I love her she is so sweet and cuddly with all her hell fire. Okay. Look. I had to restart Baldur's Gate because I found out I missed Gale and I cannot - CANNOT - function knowing I missed a party member and won't be able to decide if I want to fight them, fuck them, or marry them all on my own lol. It's funny you say he is your least fav and I'm like...the gith chick is currently the one I dislike the most because she is so ugly AND FOR WHAT?? FOR WHAT MA'AM?!?! And YESSSSSS!! Omg Mass Effect and Dragon Age are my favorite series of all time. The story Bioware told with Commander Shephard, my god, is the reason I think I write the way I do. Or part of the reason. The way they built up that world in three incredible games and even made sure in the 3rd to bring every small detail and side mission into the last game to give closure. That is fantastic writing. It's what made me want to write stories just as intricate and infuriating, because that ending....god Commander Shephard deserved BETTER. I will never shut up about this. Does it make sense?? Yes. Do I gotta like it? Hell no.

Thank you so much for being so nice. I struggled a lot with this chapter. I kept feeling like I was falling short or messing something up. So, I would have to get up and work through the dialogue and the scene through my head and when I just genuinely couldn't get over it, I forced myself to continue forward, or I would've deleted it.

[ On to your personal info dump ]: I am so incredibly sorry that you even went through that and had to experience it. Unfortunately, I know all too well what it feels like to experience the same exact thing. So, I am beyond happy that you are safe. You are out and you are learning that the peace of being alone is such an underrated joy, imo. I know it is not necessarily the same as what you meant, but if you want to share anything that weighs on you or just want to have friendly conversation when needed, I am always here for you.

You are so kind to me in telling Netflix to add in Doc lol I would literally die. It is a nice daydream to have to consider that a character created out of love for Oda sensei's vision, in all forms, would be considered. I always do my best to make sure when I speak to anyone who sends me a message or an ask that it is with kindness and gratitude. You all come and speak to me about my work and how it is something you enjoy, that it helps them, and all the while you are all helping me too. There isn't enough I could say to thank you for always being so kind. For sending me these amazingly long reviews and comments, because they are absolutely my favorite. I do not take these for granted.

I know everyone is hating on Zoro right now (for absolutely good reason) and it's funny but while I wrote him I just knew he had to do it. He's this 19-year-old petty pain in the ass who never considered having a relationship outside of his swords. He meets girl and instead of her being like everyone else, they ZING. Neither of them can explain it or understand it but they don't have to. The universe is funny like that sometimes.

Sanji and Doc are about to give Zoro a fuckin' run for his money and he is just going to have to grin and bear it because he has no choice. While he is equally gonna be pissed, she up and did something so stupid he is forgetting Doc is still equally pissed at how he reacted to her. Two idiots fighting over who is the pettiest. Always.

I do not mind your long replies or asks! These are some of my favorites and I have so much fun discussing things with you! The fact you also love Mass Effect and Dragon Age?? I AM ALIVE AND BURNING! Thank you for always being so lovely and so incredibly sweet. I hope your Monday is treating you kindly and not like an actual Monday, cause Monday's are gross lol. Much love.

#thecheesyreader #answered #Chaos in Their Bones review #I had to come on my computer and write this because it deserves a full blown computer response #thank you so much for always being incredibly sweet #it is always a pleasure to see you in my ask box #sending you all the love

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dreamwritesimagines · 1 year

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okayyyy final scene here we come (and i have so many thoughts on this omg!! i literally had to stop reading like four times because i kept squealing lmfao)

starting off strong with “Hello there, potential murderer,” he teased you. “Is everything alright?” PLS HE HAS NO RIGHT BEING THIS ADORABLE!! also (and maybe this is just me) but i feel like he comes out with the "potential murderer" comment to lighten the mood because he knows if he immediately got all serious and asking if clover was okay then she'd shut down and panic because our girl does NOT deal well with serious emotional conversations lmao.

"You nodded again and took a step to walk past him but he caught your hand before you could walk away, your name leaving his lips again. You stopped dead in your tracks, sparks of excitement rushing through your veins before you bit down on your lip, then laced your fingers through his, your heart doing a happy flip. You could swear the simple gesture made his breath hitch and you stepped closer to him to rest your forehead against his hard chest, standing there completely still like a statue. His pleasant scent filled your nostrils, making you take a deep breath as discreetly as you could." OKAY THERE IS SO MUCH I WANT TO UNPACK WITH THIS OMFG

alright when i first read it i was low-key expecting her to panic and pull away the second he touched her because that honestly wouldn't be out of character for her but no??? she held his hand??? "the simple gesture made his breath hitch"???? stop pls they're too much, im so sensitive istg 😭😭😭 nah but you just KNOW that ben's brain is absolutely short-circuiting the moment she actually initiates physical contact with him. also i can't help but notice that he grabbed her hand instead of her wrist. now this could (of course) just be because it was easiest for him to reach but a small part of me thinks maybe he deliberately avoided touching her wrist (or maybe im delusional lol idk). and then she RESTED HER FOREHEAD ON HIS CHEST???? STOPPPPPPPP!!!! bro the mutual pining is too much for me istg between her "taking a deep breath" and him "nuzzled to the top of your head" they're practically inhaling each other and honestly im here for it.

“Can we stay like this for a moment please?” Benedict’s voice was soft; “We can stay like this for as long as you want.” i cannot possibly express how much i love this mutual need for closeness that they have. like they don't even need to talk they just need to be close to each other and have this kind of silent companionship it's so fucking sweet i could die of toothache lmao 😭😭 and the fact that ben asks if she's okay but then doesn't push her or try and force her to talk because he just knows her walls will come up if he does 😭😭

“Inside my head is not peaceful I guess,” you said. “It happens sometimes.” alright this is one of the things i love the most about clover. one thing i find in a LOT of stories is the main character has faults that are only really there when they need to be. clover's faults are always there, lingering in the back of her mind, and they're so real. (honestly she's so similar to me it scares me sometimes) her faults and insecurities aren't necessarily super dramatic or big, but they're constant. they never completely leave her mind and can be triggered by the smallest thing and that's honestly so realistic and i absolutely APPLAUD you for being able to write a character like that because it's not something a lot of writers can do consistently.

“Do you want to go back home?” “No,” you muttered. “I just…it helps. You being here.” “I’ll always be here,” OKAY THIS!! again it comes back to this silent companionship and need to be close to one-another that i find so adorable. the absolute safety and comfort they find in each other's mere EXISTENCE. like they don't need to be constantly making these grand gestures and speeches, they just need to be there and close to one another to be content and it honestly makes me want to cry (me & who fr 😭).

“Can you say that nonsense thing that I don’t believe in?” “I love you,” he murmured into your hair and heaved a sigh. “God, you have no idea how much I love you.” ALRIGHT WHERE DO I BEGIN!?!? THIS WAS SUCH A MOMENT FOR ME BECAUSE ITS SUCH DEVELOPMENT FROM THE SCENE WHERE THEY FIRST KISSED AND HE TRIED TO TELL HER HE LOVED HER BUT SHE WAS LIKE “don’t, don't say it." AND NOW SHE'S LITERALLY ASKING HIM TO TELL HER HE LOVES HER PLS THIS IS THE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT IM HERE FOR!!!

"your smile widened, his words washing away that small insecure voice in your head." nahhh but i love this line so so so much because she doesn't even doubt him. regardless of her insecurities, she doesn't for a moment doubt ben's words which again goes back to the scene when they kissed and he tried to tell her he loved her because it was said that she didn't want to hear if because she "didn't believe it". now she does believe it, and she believes anything he says just because it comes from him. for someone as distrusting as her, the absolute faith she has in him and his words is incredible pls i literally love them so much.

anyways that's all for today's pointless ramblings lol. thank you so so much for GoS your writing is incredible as always 🩷🩷

- 🪩

Final scene, final sceneeee! 🥰

So first of all I had this picture in mind for the final scene, especially with Clover resting her head on his chest, kinda like a paintiiiing 😍

Loll oh he totally knew she would shut down and just walk away if he pressured her to talk ❤️

Benedict was so holding his breath the moment she took the first step on that ❤️ Like, especially considering he's overall a very physical person and Clover is the opposite 🥰 So it means a lot for her to take that first step❤️

now this could (of course) just be because it was easiest for him to reach but a small part of me thinks maybe he deliberately avoided touching her wrist

THAT SMALL PART OF YOU IS ABSOLUTELY RIGHT! ❤️ It was totally deliberate, he didn't want to scare her off or make her pull back by touching her wrist 🥰❤️ I'm so happy that you noticed that detail! 😍

Mutual pining is so so fun! ❤️ Inhaling each other awwww! ❤️

I also think it became a part of their whole dynamic, like they are honestly so comfortable in silence as long as they are with each other ❤️ It's so peaceful for them both ❤️

clover's faults are always there, lingering in the back of her mind, and they're so real. (honestly she's so similar to me it scares me sometimes) her faults and insecurities aren't necessarily super dramatic or big, but they're constant. they never completely leave her mind and can be triggered by the smallest thing and that's honestly so realistic I AM GOING TO CRY OMG THIS MEANS SO MUCH TO ME! ❤️

A character's flaws and how that character handles those flaws and how they take a part in their life is actually something I pay a lot of attention to, both while reading and writing ❤️🥰 I think it creates a huge part of the character's personality and their dynamic with the other characters and the rest of the world, and aaaaaaa it makes me so excited to hear that I managed to reflect it🥰❤️

Yessss and that silent companionship is like...kind of what we said at the beginning of the fic where they have "black cat / golden retriever" energy 😂 Their dynamic is so like that, they're both in the same place enjoying each other's presence 😁

Omg yesssss! Like, from that moment in rooftop and especially when they kissed for the first time, Clover was so stubborn not to let him say it, she didn't even want to hear him say "I love you" but she craves it now! ❤️ It's not a threat about future or a manipulation tactic for her anymore, it is something that gives him peace and happiness and makes her feel safe 😍🥰 She trusts him so so much! ❤️

DARLING OMG-

I can't thank you enough for this, you've made my day with these! You're so amazing and I love youuuu, thank you so much! 😍😍😍

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snappleapple · 4 years

Text

their favorite types of kisses

people in this - dream, georgenotfound, sapnap, wilbur, punz, jschlatt, awesamdude, quackity

headcanon!

the most disgusting fluff i’ve ever written

warning - cursing, i think that’s all but if there is more please do not hesitate to tell me :)

word count - 2k

a/n: okay okay, i might’ve lied earlier about that being my last post but this was short and easy to make which is why i would like to feed my readers this early haha. anyways, enjoy and please disregard the errors in this post, i hate proof reading anything lol. also, i’ve been very indecisive on the title and i might change it later and ooh, my masterlist will be made soon. i’ve just been feeling very unproductive these days. also, please put in requests, i am so bored and dumb therefore there are no ideas in this brain. and if you’d like a part 2, i might add more people for the part 2!anyways, peace!

dream -

i get the feeling that dream��s favorite type of kisses would be cheek kisses

he just likes to watch as you struggle to reach his height

“aw look at those little legs do their thing.”

ends up with you not giving him his kiss

and mans becomes SO pouty

“y/n…come on. don’t be this way.” :(

if you don’t kiss him on the cheek, will also become SO clingy and whiny

“why won’t you KISS ME!”

clenches his fists and stomps away like a teenage girl during puberty

slamming the door to your room

so then you have to go and give him all the kisses he wants

his face is slammed into your pillow

you sit on the side of the bed and pet his hair

leading him to stare up at you with puppy dog eyes

“i will give you all the kisses you want. so stop being so pouty, you big baby.”

will literally leave zero feet of space between you and him

taps his cheek to tell you he wants kisses

when you go on dates, will literally make you stand on your tippy toes to get his kisses

does not bend down at all and actually lifts his head higher to tease you

in other words, clingy but rude hoe

george -

george is a classic romantic

he loves just lip kisses

pecks or lingering ones

he doesn’t care

mans don’t need too many kisses

nor does he need to be too clingy

total opposite of dream and sapnap *ahem clingy ahem*

if he wants a kiss,

he will come over to you and get it

doesn’t get pouty if you’re busy

just waits patiently

doesn’t enjoy it when you interrupt him when he’s streaming so you do your own thing

when you’re watching a movie with him,

he will literally only stare at you with his cute smile

and listen to your every criticism of the movie

he likes to just peck your lips whenever he feels like it

and you’re just not surprised anymore

just likes to stare at your lips whenever you talk

overall, is very sweet but not to an extent with showing affection

sapnap -

omg

sapnap just vibes with neck kisses

it tickles his neck and he loves them

giggles when you pepper kisses along his neck and flushes a deep red

“y/n. stop.” giggles between each word

but when you do, becomes the saddest person in the whole world

“i was joking.” :(

when he’s streaming and he begins to miss you

would leave his room and find you just to get a kiss

just like dream, would get angry if you give him no kisses

“GIVE ME KISSIES!”

very amusing for you

and you love to tease him

“i don’t want to give you kissies.”

continues to stare at you with a large frown until you give in and give him kissies

lsg supremacy but i’ll get into this later hehe

you better give him kisses or you’ll be dealing with a very sad sapnap

sadnap :(

wilbur -

wilbur, wilbur, wilbur

what can i even say

total nose kiss guy

i bet he’ll boop your nose twenty four seven

asks stupid questions just to get your attention

“y/n?”

“yes wilbur?”

“is a hotdog a sandwich?”

“why-“

“boop.”

“did you just say boop while you booped my nose?”

if he’s streaming and you bring him a snack

he will hold your face still and leave kisses on your nose

not too clingy but not too distant

likes to be just right with you

if its snowy outside and your noses get red

makes dumb jokes about he is rudolph and you’re mrs. rudolph

just a lot of smooches from wilby

takes you to a lot of hidden cafes in the city

and while you read, he balances his head on his palm, staring at you in admiration

if you’re insecure about your nose, you legit can’t be around wilbur because he will go on a tangent about how beautiful it is

substantially, soft boy hours all day bro, besides when he gets mad then you leave the hormonal man tf alone

punz -

i don’t see a lot of punz on tumblr so here we go

punz loves hand kisses

not to an extent where he has a hand fetish

god no but just like

when your holding hands, he’ll occasionally pull your hand up to his lips and leave a kiss

lots of hand holding

and i mean lots

constantly gets mad fun of for being a simp but ignores those comments because he genuinely loves you so much

likes it when you play with his hair and messing it up

also likes to compare hand sizes with you

always has a hand on your thigh or your hand in his whenever he is driving somewhere with you

even when you go on dates, always holding hands

no matter how sweaty your hand gets, he will hold on

sometimes if he holds on for too long, you have to tell him to let go

“punz, my hand is super sweaty. lets take a break from the hand holding.”

would flat out decline so you would have to pry your hand out of his

he would also love it when you would kiss his hand

makes him feel all polite and precious LOL

would also wrap his pinky along yours when you walk together

he once came with you to a family gathering for christmas and was so SHY

shy boy held your hand for security while your younger siblings made fun of you

afterwards, when you were under a mistletoe, he kisses you on the lips before kissing you on his favorite part of your body,

your hand

c!jschlatt -

jschlatt is a whole mess

the first time you met, he confessed that he would hate you for as long as you lived because you made fun of his boots

now he says he still strongly dislikes you but you’re more tolerable

doesn’t like it when you make him soft and HATES it when he blushes

“why must you do this to me, mother nature?”

also “hates” it when you even touch him because he “hates” you

when he actually confessed to you that he liked you with his grumpy usual grandpa voice,

you kissed him on his forehead, after he bent down of course

he is an actual giant and threatens to squash you like an ant if he feels the need to

is an absolute monster to you but loves it when you kiss his forehead because it makes him feel secure and loved

likes to watch the wind blow through your hair and mess it up but gives you his hat because he like you being “all pretty and shit”

gets SUPER jealous when you hug children

like for example, when you went over to a family gathering at his house, his cousins came up to hug you

and when you let go of the child, the man child comes and lugs you over his shoulder

gets yelled at by his mom and gives her a sheepish smile before rolling his eyes and throwing you down on the sofa set next to him

his mom doesn’t approve of the way he treats you but you tell her its fine because he’s cute

when you are far from any type of civilization or in the safety and solitude of your own home, he wants kisses on the forehead

pointing up to it and bending down so you could reach it

“y/n, i only love you because of your forehead kisses.”

“you only love me for my kisses?” :(

“mhm.”

actually feels slightly bad

“and because of your personality.”

“thank you-“

“shut up. we don’t talk about this.”

in conclusion, give him his forehead kisses or perish

awesamdude -

sam just adores it when you give him jawline kisses

not because it’s basically the only place you could reach but because it’s a sweet gesture

sam is all about sweetness

i mean have you even seen this man on his stream

he likes to watch you while you have conversations with your friends

not in a creepy way but more like an adoring way

cause man does he love you

i mean not only does he love you but his whole family does

and when you’re alone with sam, you love to bury him underneath all of your love

“i love you sam!”

“no i love you more y/n!”

“NO i LOVE you more!”

“NO i LOVE you MORE!”

“SAM NO. I LOVE YOU MORE!”

“okay thank you sweet pea.”

leaving you a bit confused but happy that he accepts your love

when you cuddle, omg

he never stops peppering kisses all over your face and vice versa because your relationship is disgustingly fluffy

when he lends you one of his sweatshirts, you sure as hell better wear that shit out or else (i am leaving a blank threat here)

sam loves technology but you guys sort of have a system

a system that involves mailing each other love letters rather than texting them

you guys also go on a ton of walks just about anywhere

hand holding is mandatory even though you probably look like a child compared to him

just give sam lots of love and in return, you’ll receive lots of love

quackity -

mans cannot leave you tf alone

likes to do ANYTHING freaky around you

“i will follow you to the ends of the earth, mi amor.” or

“ayy, back off.” if anyone gets too close to you

messes with you twenty four seven and makes it his job to drive you insane

plays horror games at two in the morning for fun

and when he gets scared, hides in the safety of your arms

“mi amor. i’m scared.”

“shut the fuck up and sleep, alex.”

“okay.” shuts up quickly and snuggles deeper into the crook of your neck

loves you so deeply but HATES your cat

“look at that little dumb thing stare at me. you got a problem bro?”

your cat also HATES alex

scratches him all the time and hisses at him

if you think sapnap is babie, wait till you meet alex

“y/n he bit me!”

when you glance down, you don’t even see a scratch

“kiss my boo boo.”

wtf

“what boo boo? there’s nothing there.”

gasps as if you offended him

“this boo boo that your el demonio did to me.”

this man will do anything to get boo boo kisses

istg, you once found him provoking your cat to get some scratches

in alex’s mind, ouchies = kisses from y/n

always has ouchies from god knows where and shows it to you

even though you find it annoying at first, you grow used to it and it sorta becomes your thing with alex

alex is babie and you need to take good care of him :)

9K notes · View notes

7teenkarat · 2 years

Text

Seventeen as questionable things my roommate has done:

S.Coups: Is loaded as fuck but gets pouty when you only order one McDonald’s set, or only one Starbucks coffee. Says he’s fine but sulked for the whole week and later posted an Instagram story quoting how sad it is that “it’s the people you love who hurt you the most”. Literally still brings it up to your parents sometimes.

Jeonghan: Meal preps for the week based on his workout regime but will only eat your food. Has his own room but you come back home to find him sprawled out across your bed. Steals your headbands and tries to act innocent when you confront him - even though he’s clearly wearing it right now. But y/n don’t I look so cute ^-^. But goes absolutely feral when you touch his shit.

Joshua: A sore. fucking. loser. Cannot play any board game or mario game with him under ANY circumstances in fear of getting your fifth noise complaint from your neighbor, and consequently becoming homeless. Is even competitive over Apples to Apples? Wtf. But strangely mild when you guys play Animal Crossing. Maybe he’s found his people.

Jun: Makes weird fucking noises the minute the sun goes down. Istg it’s like he can’t contain it and it just explodes out of his body? Is he connected to the moon cycles or something? Y’all are just chilling eating dinner and he starts squawking then gets up to get a glass of water as if nothing is wrong. A good portion of your friend group thinks he might be possessed

Hoshi: Asks you to edit his online interactions. Every. Single. One. He asks you to choose an Insta filter for his post when you get back from work, help choose which crypto meme his current Tinder fling would find funnier (spoiler: none), stands outside the bathroom door to ask whether or not he should retweet an Obama meme from 2016 even though it’s already 2022 - when you’re trying to take a peaceful shit. You are literally his ghostwriter and PR manager rolled into one

Wonwoo: Compares you to video game characters, and not in a flattering way. “God y/n, you’re being such a Mr.Resetti (Animal Crossing) right now.” “Wonwoo do I look good in this dress?” “Woah y/n you look exactly like Braum…stunning” You decide to look up who Braum is later and find out they look something like this -

Woozi: Is actually really funny and charming, but the moment he meets anyone of importance like your friends or s/o he turns so fucking awkward. Will be asked a question and just sit there not answering for a minute…then get up to turn on some music and walk right out of the room. Becomes super social during dinner, lowkey has everyone whipped, but the moment food is gone so is he-

The8: Meditation guru. Actually started after he went to visit your family and met your hippie uncle, then proceeded to go on a meditation pilgrimage with him and the prince of Nepal. 50/50 hit or miss - either ends up entering a really solid meditative state or falls asleep but will VEHEMENTLY deny it if you confront him.

Mingyu: Is on a strict workout routine and stockpiles chicken breast in the fridge until there’s no space left for any other form of sustenance. The little shit throws out your ice-cream tubs too because it “takes up too much space and is too tempting”. Everytime you open the fridge for a late night snack you’re met with rows upon rows of chicken boobies emanating a weird smell…you now no longer enjoy food and never will again.

Dokyeom: Doesn’t wash his fruits before eating them. Hello sir? Pesticides? Dirt? Bacteria? You tell him please for the love of god at least run them under some water unless he wants some weird fungi to grow out of his bellybutton. The next day you find him diligently washing blueberries one by one with some dish soap.

Vernon: Either has a 50 or 150 IQ, you still can’t tell to this day. Like Jun, pretty sure his brain cell count fluctuates with the moon cycle. Calculates the tip, split x amount of ways, in his head in literally 8 seconds. Former Stanford med dropout. But last night you walked in on him standing by an overflowing washer because it “started making scary noises so I panicked and started button mashing”.

Seungkwan: Has an unhealthy obsession with tik-tok “health tips” and always tries to rope you in on it too. Was especially obsessed with liquid chlorophyll and washing his hair with rice water. Refuses to let you go out on dates unless you ask the other person for their birth date and time so he can sus them out astrologically first - and is actually really accurate with it.

Dino: Is not actually human but rather a robot containing the world’s largest collection of dad jokes. Has a dad joke for every occasion, usually his comedic timing is *chef’s kiss*. But you can’t ever laugh because he takes that as consent to then keep you trapped for the next 30 minutes in a vicious cycle of joke after joke…after joke...worst part is he pauses at the end of every joke to wait for you to laugh and you have to because he’s staring you down and you’re starting to sweat. Something akin to hell.

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alfredolover119 · 4 years

Note

I looooove your zukka rec lists! I recently became Avatar-obsessed, never got a chance to watch it as a kid and only just got through it all! I was wondering if you'd consider doing a specifically angst rec list? I love fluffy zukka everything, but sometimes you just gotta have your heart ripped out of your chest and put back in after being thoroughly blended.

thank you! i relate heavily to “recently became Avatar-obsessed” haha. as for the angst list, i sure can try! warning: all of these have happy endings because im a crybaby who can’t read unhappy endings. also, p much all of the fics in the completed section were featured on my other lists but this is specifically the ANGSTY ones >:^)

angsty zukka wips

first, most obviously, feels like we only go backwards by @oldpotatoe

-currently at 102k with 19/27 chapters posted; rated teen

-the amnesia fic. the amnesia fic. the amnesia fic. you know. i haven’t actually read it yet because, as previously mentioned, i’m a crybaby and am waiting for it to finish up but, from my understanding, this fic will murder you in a dark alleyway with no remorse. if u like zukka angst, you’ve probably already read this, but just in case!

An injury leaves Sokka with amnesia. His last memory is of the failed invasion, of leaving his father behind in enemy territory on the Day of Black Sun. Of hopelessness. Rage. // But then he wakes up, and the war is over. Suddenly, he must come to terms with the fact that years have passed, and that he's somehow the Southern Water Tribe Ambassador to the Fire Nation. He is also supposedly friends with banished-Prince-turned-Fire-Lord Zuko, of all people. Close friends.

Yeah, nah.

and i’ll do anything you say (if you say it with your hands) by @goldrushzukka

-currently 38k with 6/8 chapters posted; rated mature

-holy shit. holy SHIT. modern au based on the “my cat likes my fuckbuddy and i am falling in love” trope(?). maybe it’s just because of how the last chapter ended, but oh my god. this one made me cry. made me want to commit violence. when it’s not angsty as hell, it’s pretty funny, but holy shit. ao3 user nebulastucky please.

It’s supposed to be a one night stand. Pick up some guy at a bar, barely remember his name and never learn anything real about him, send him packing in the morning with a thanks for the ride and a cup of coffee to-go. That’s how it’s supposed to go. // But then it’s the best sex Sokka has ever had, and he thinks he’ll hate himself if he never gets to have it again.

Violet Blossoms and Celestial Objects by @hollypunkers

-currently 15k with 2/? posted. rated teen.

-this is the sequel to blue (an angsty, zukka rewrite of book 2-- go read it if u havent!)! !! this is a book 3 rewrite. only two chapters in and mrs hollypunkers is really abusing the miscommunication tag, as zukka writers seem to enjoy doing. im excited to see how the world and story develops with the changes to the story! you should be too!! its very good! obviously spoilers for blue lmao

Having sided with the Avatar in Ba Sing Se, Zuko not only must navigate his new relationship with Sokka but returning to the Fire Nation as a banished enemy. His own journey of self discovery and personal growth must now coexist alongside the personal struggles of every other member of the Gaang as together they blaze a treacherous path toward an unsure victory against Zuko's own father and nation.

breakable heaven by @fruitysokka

-currently 71k with 9/11 chapters posted. rated teen

-swt ambassador zuko! soon to be chief sokka! fake dating ur best friend to get out of an arranged marriage! what could go wrong!!! i also haven’t read this one ((see: i’m a crybaby who is being hurt by too many zukka wips already)), but it has been hanging out in my marked for later for months. from what i understand, this fic has: angst.

With his twenty-first birthday looming just around the corner, the Southern Water Tribe Elders have decided that Sokka, next in line to be Chief, needs to get married. Sokka does not want that, but he does need to get them off his back until he can figure his way out of it. What better way to do that than to pretend to date his best friend (and newly minted Ambassador to the Southern Water Tribe) Zuko? // Seriously, this is a foolproof plan. Maybe one of Sokka's best. Absolutely nothing can go wrong.

angsty zukka fics (completed!)

(i’ll put these in wc order)

lighthouse beam by @incorrectzukka

-7k, rated g

-a modern college au!! zuko’s inner-monologue is very angsty in this fic. typical zuko. also per usual, theyre both fucking dorks. they sort themselves out in the end, but not before The Angst. zuko is semi-deaf in this fic and also he has a bit of internalized homophobia.

Sokka’s breathtakingly beautiful and he’s smart and makes other people laugh. Zuko has a half-burnt face and a deaf ear. It’s not rocket science. // Or, Zuko falls in love with the boy in his Philosophy class.

This Isn’t My Idea of Fun by @khaleeseas

-9k, explicit

-moon spirit/nwt prince!sokka, no war to be found here! admittedly this isnt THAT angsty but like. the angst IS present. zuko is still the prince. a lovely childhood friends (though they hated each other for a minute haha) to lovers story.

If you asked Zuko, he and Azula saw far too much of Chief Hakoda of the Northern Water Tribe’s children growing up. It wasn’t until they were older, and Azula pointed out that - duh - their families were trying to set them all up, that he realized why. // He was told by his mother to be polite. These people were their friends and allies, and though their nations were as different as they came, harmony between nations was the most important thing. // It wasn’t his fault the Chief’s children were so annoying.

put your lips close to mine (as long as they don’t touch) by @celestialceci

-9k, teen

-modern au! zuko and sokka are college roommates. zuko goes to spend the summer with sokka. again,, not really that angsty but-- its there!! the detail and feeling of Home in this story make me happy. zuko is insecure as hell here too. if ur into that.

Zuko hates his home. He likes college alright, but he likes Sokka even better, his assigned roommate turned best friend. Spending the summer with Sokka will be fun, a welcome change of pace he desperately wants. It probably won't awaken anything in him... right?

the thing about dancing by anodymalion

-9k, teen

-yes. this one right here officer. it makes my heart ache. also trans sokka! which is cool. but the zuko angst in this one. hurts me. not so much relationship angst as it is zuko learning he deserves happiness angst. i’m sure u know The Type.

The first time a attendant spills Zuko’s tea and doesn’t immediately fall to her knees, begging the Fire Lord’s forgiveness, it is not anger but a resounding warmth that fills his chest.

i could (never) give you peace by @zukkababey

-10k, mature

-OUCH. OUCH OUCH OUCH. boys please learn to communicate im begging u. also zuko.. zuko, dude. as the tags of the fic say, hes “really going through it” in this one. YOUCH. post-canon.

Zuko almost said it. He almost said the words I think I’m in love with you, but he choked them back down at the last second. // Zuko would never be able to be what Sokka wanted. They might have needed each other during the summer, when two boys with too much weight on their shoulders found comfort in each other in the only way they knew how. // But now Zuko was Fire Lord, and Sokka was leaving.

this love burns so yellow (becoming orange and in its time, exploding) by @meliebee

-18k, teen, major character death

-i lied. THIS is the one, officer. found family.. good mai and zuko and toph friendships.. . ozai escapes prison and tries to overthrow zuko. OBVIOUSLY angst ensues. poor boy. he Does heal in this but it gets worse before it gets better. angst angst angst angst.

Ten months after Zuko is crowned at seventeen, he faces his first coup.

Anything for You by beersforqueers

-23k, explicit

-istg. this is probably one of my favorite zukka fics. its PAINFUL. modern au where theyre broken up but sokka hasnt told his family yet so zuko goes home with him for kataang wedding. a bit smutty, but the plot oh my god ohgm y fuvk. made me cry the first time i read it. (see: crybaby!me) insert that one picture of the horse with the caption PAIN.

In which Sokka and Zuko have broken up but Sokka hasn't told his family yet. So when Katara and Aang's wedding weekend rolls around and he doesn't want to break Gran-Gran's heart, he asks Zuko to pretend to be his boyfriend for one last weekend. // Things don't go as planned.

Moving Mountains by @thefangirlingdead

-64k, mature

-so. when i read this the first time it was in one sitting. soulmate au set within canon era / the comics, to an extent. soulmates can hear each others thoughts. i will happily say this is slowburn, jesus christ. champagne without the cham.

Soulmates are chosen by the spirits and can hear each other’s thoughts. Sokka thinks it’s cheesy and dumb. Zuko thinks it’s poetic justice that he doesn’t have one because he doesn’t deserve it. Cruel irony is finding out that the prince of the Fire Nation (and the person currently hunting you) is your soulmate.

In the Soft Light by @voidcenturyscholar and @romancedawning

-83k, teen, graphic depictions of violence

-moon spirit!sokka living in the northern water tribe. zuko is sent to the northern water tribe as a cultural liaison. iroh is the fire lord but while he is away taking care of lu ten after his injury ozai steps up. i cannot express how many emotions this fic made me feel. background yuetara. i would almost say found family?? but. anyway. plenty of angst to spare here with a healthy dose of enemies to friends to lovers.

As the newly appointed cultural liaison to Northern Water Tribe, Zuko is the first Fire Nation Citizen to step foot inside the city's walls in nearly a century. He's determined to prove himself—to the Fire Lord and to his father—even if the Water Tribe's spirit-touched prince seems to want nothing to do with him.

That Midnight Sky by @zukkababey

-103k, teen

-now now now. tms... modern college au where sokka agrees to tutor zuko in physics because zuko has to maintain straight a’s and physics is just not doing it for him. so. thats cool but THEN azula moves in, randomly, with zuko. to hide the fact that sokka is tutoring zuko, they fake date! what could go wrong!! the mutual pining in here combined with the angst... wonderful, tasty. everyone read it rn. also SLOWBURN

In Zuko’s strict family, needing a tutor is just about the worst thing you could do. Failing a class, however, is even worse. The only rational solution? Take up Aang on his offer to find him a physics tutor and have Sokka—beautiful, smart, handsome Sokka—tutor him in secret. // When Azula’s arrival threatens to reveal Zuko’s secret, it’s up to Sokka to convince her this definitely isn’t what it looks like. See, he’s actually… Zuko’s… boyfriend? // Hmm. There’s no way this could get complicated, right?

#zukka #zuko #sokka #angst #zukka angst #atla #avatar: the last airbender #fic recs #zukka fic recs

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iambecomeyourvillain · 3 years

Note

i'm 60 chapters in and:

baz is literally one step away from dicking down simon

penelope bunce won my heart over when she agreed to help put baz's mother at peace

i still can't figure out agatha's deal but for the time being i've decided she's just a minor inconvenience and a possible cockblocker in my otp

LUCY IS THE MAGE'S (dAVy) EX I CAN'T EVEN- nOw wE dOn't hAvE tiMe tO uNpAck aLl oF tHaT

NICO?????? IS???? EBB'S?????? TWIN???? THE FUCK????

the sheer yearning that baz is going through oh god i want to hug him

"i never want snow to leave" yeah i died

penelope and baz being friends (frenemies?) is my new favorite thing aksjaksjd

baz's mother sounds so nice and powerful i cri

simon rushed to baz's house without even telling penny first and i will never ever shut up about it

BAZ BLUSHED ON SEEING SIMON IN HIS FOYER 😭😭😭

simon and baz held hands. for a good amount of time. even after they finished the magic thing. *incoherent screaming*

and that one quote????? about finding a million men who look like simon bloody snow and breaking each of their hearts????? oh god oh god oh gOd

SO FAST BITCH. also sOmEthiNg's about to happen—

fair enough though it's. so good.

lmAo

penelope bunce is literally THE ya female protagonist everyone aspires to be

minor inconvenience and cockblock lmfao i cannot—

yEaH lucy and the mage i. yeah better nOt unpack that as loNg as you can—

NICO. IS. YES. TWIN—

istg—

BAZ PITCH IS THE BIGGEST SIMP ON THE PLANET and that's THAT.

yEs

H E Y SIMON MISSED HIM SHHH. aLsO "baz.. you're wearing jeAns" and "i am. and you're wearing half the countryside." lMAO

YES AHDLDF POOR BAZ—

PLEASE THE MAGIC THING HAS MY WHOLE HEART— THE WAY HE GOT ✨dRUNK✨ on simon and his power i. oH my gOd akdgkdhdjdg

PLEASE NO SHUT UP AJXFKSFE I'M MALFUNCTIONING—

this is. a riDe

PLEASE TELL ME YOU'VE READ AHEAD SHAT

#shatrupa my beloved #simp shat hours #carry on spoilers #snowbaz

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cangrellesteponme · 3 years

Note

Maybe “you’re my favorite” for Sebagni? 🖤

so, thinking about this, i wanted fluff, but my brain hit me with character death and grief and shit (but not agni. never agni.) with like. so little sebagni here. so. if i wrote a short fic about this it'd be fairly simple:

(one rambly semi-narrated idea with bad dialogue, coming right up!)

Imagine one of those "everything goes smoothly contrary to the intense and unbearable pain of canon" AUs. Sebastian still ends up eating our favourite blue boy's soul, but their relationship was just overall better because this version of Seb is not as much of a dick. The secret twin drama resolves itself WITH NO DEATHS and everyone lives a nice little life, vengeance is achieved, contracts are fulfilled, souls are consumed, all that good stuff.

Even years later, Sebastian keeps his current name and appearance ("Just for a moment," he probably says, "I liked that one, so there's no need to leave it behind, yet.") and settles down with the greatest man and softest husband, Agni, in the cliché little house everyone imagines when they think of calm, happy days, away from the troubles of a conflicted life. They're the grossly smitten couple that never moves past the honeymoon phase, even though their version of it is not endless passion, but more of a consistent, certain and reliable kind of love. Overall adorable, as these two are.

Their daily life is all the nice shit you could ever imagine. Soma visits on (most) weekends, they get to be annoying parents with him, and it's great. Really. Even though it does, sometimes, remind Sebastian of another young boy he had gotten used to caring for, and of how empty the house can feel, and of how much he misses days that were less peaceful, less pleasant, and other things he can't find the words for because he never bothered to think about it when the brat was still alive. Because yes, all of this is nice, but grief isn't something that ever goes away when you're not even used to loving things enough to miss them when they're gone.

(also i love making characters suffer in ways they cannot ever fix. i'm mean like that.)

So the routine has one more step. Regular visits to the Phantomhive manor, and to the neat little stone in what i assume would be a backyard-turned-graveyard (or is it cemetary... i do not know), become a thing.

(and this is where we get ridiculously dramatic and mostly one-sided dialogue! agni is my fave but i never let him say a word istg, my man's a dearly beloved plot device)

During one particular visit, Agni notices that his trash demon's eyes simply won't leave the building, rather than the gravestone, which is unusual. (or as unusual as it can be, considering that there's no real habit here, since the only thing these visits have in common is that they're definitely not fun! like, not fun at all. agni's out there being a supportive husband but this is depressing as fuck)

(anyway basically he's like, "what's up" and seb is like *dramatic pause* bc he's just Like That and eventually he actually opens his damn mouth)

"Human life is so ridiculously fragile," he starts, and his tone is so casual it makes it sound like a boring scientific fact that has no incidence on actual people's lives, "I should know better than to let it affect me. Yet so many of them have. And most of them belong, or belonged in that manor."

"Most of them?"

"Not all of them, obviously. Don't you know?"

(and here we would have some comment about seb's completely ridiculous tendency to be the sassiest little bitch at the worst possible times, and about how that cheeky little "don't you know?" is not as ckeey as it should be, actually, and agni thinks he kind of looks like he's about to turn into a sobbing mess right then and there, even though he knows demons can't cry, but before he gets to voice any of that concern, seb decides to hit him with more dramatic dialogue.)

"You're my favourite. And I think you will always hold that title, as a boring old man, or as worthlessly precious ashes on a shelf," he rushes through some of the words, taken by an uncharacteristic agitation, hands held out in front of him in some meaningless gesture, "and even just as you, right now, listening to me like you always do, because for some odd reason you still love me."

"And I'll love you forever."

It's all Agni says, because sometimes people only need someone to listen and to remind them of simple things to soothe complex pains.

(he's a saint and i love him)

"I don't doubt that you will."

(and seb will definitely love his sweet husband because that man. that man. and he's the only person he hasn't failed to care for, have a nice day)

#DID I WRITE FOR LIKE AN HOUR? yes but also i was very distracted #and tumblr screwed me over like. twice #i am sorry for making this sad. i keep giving the world nothing but visiting graves scenarios.#bc i love those.#anyway #kuroshitsuji #sebagni #ota's ask answers

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bi-rising · 3 years

Note

istg most (internet) people who pertain in minority groups and engage in discourse are so DUMB, and i say this being a bisexual woman. the "you don't have a say in this unless you're one of us! listen to x voices!" attitude is so stupid 90% of the time like. just because you're poc or lgbt or neurodivergent or whatever doesn't mean you're right omg!! that's like saying "well, i am human, therefore i am at the same level of understanding as an anthropologist" ??? jesus christ let people who at least have studied complex ass subjects like colonialism talk! if you refuse to listen because of the colour of their skin... doesn't that sound wrong to yall? oh no that's right bc they're white so that means they're evil, all of us are! just like all cis people and all men and all neurotypical people are too... this website is srsly inhabited by ignorants

you're absolutely correct. i've spent years undoing the harm that my racist grandmother did to me, through education both formally and of my own choosing. i've put in the work and i continue to put in the work, will continue to work on it my whole life. the whole point of being a sociologist is to advocate for and uplift minority voices. but just bc someone is part of a minority doesn't make their opinions always right.

colonialism is a huge issue that seeps into many parts of our country's ideals and structures. it's a problem that has to be addressed. however, that can be done without 1) degrading non-poc people and 2) spreading the word willy nilly to subjects it doesn't apply to. a huge part of colonialism is acting in large groups and affecting change based upon that group's ideological intolerances of the minority and the desire to destroy that minority. individual people who would like to live in the mountains is not colonialism. individual people who want to find peace and quiet, who are not looking to destroy minority culture and ideology, and who will never realistically be able to fulfill that dream bc again, cottagecore is predominantly popular among poor people, both poc and non-poc, are not colonialists.

also, i just want to add that if ppl were doing the opposite and saying that they wanted to move to big cities, these types of people would still call them racist, because they'd be accusing them of gentrification (which, again, cannot happen by poor white people). there's just no pleasing everyone. especially when minority voices are not and have never been a monolith. if i listened to them, then the creators i've mentioned would call me out for not listening to the "right" poc voices. if i listen to the creators then these idiots call me out for not listening to the "right" poc voices.

the whole point of this debate is to make white people back down and abandon a harmless aesthetic bc it makes progressive zoomers feel powerful to bully and suicide bait people that don't agree with them.

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the-voltage-diaries · 4 years

Text

I’m only one call away, I’ll be there to save the day - Daisuke Kambe x Haru Katou

AO3 link

This is the literal definition of self indulgence I’m not even kidding you.

And I totally did not write the last 1/3rd of it in a car because I didn’t have the patience to get home.

And this is unedited. So if you find errors please spare my humble life. I LITERALLY WROTE THIS ENTIRE THING TODAY. The inspiration istg.

Summary:

Daisuke Kambe doesn't get nervous. He doesn't overthink. He doesn't doubt anything he does, or any decision he makes. Except when he's in the dressing room, waiting for Hoshino to come and escort him to his soon-to-be husband. 'Cold feet' is the farthest term one would use to describe Daisuke, yet here he stands in front of the large mirror, wondering if he's good enough for the man whose eyes shine brighter than any star he's seen.

All it takes is one call.

And before he knows it, Haru right there in front of him.

He needs his hero, and Haru is there.

TW: Panic Word count: 3136 (woohoo)

Special tag: @akaiiro-yume for being my ultimate simp buddy. I told her this whole thing as just an idea and she said she felt like crying and I was like FUCK IT IM GONNA WRITE IT. So here we are. Thank you.

“Daisuke Kambe,” Haru called his name, his voice so gentle it almost got drowned by the waves as he looked straight ahead at them with Kambe by his side. The serene way his lips curved into a peace smile hid with such grace the nervousness shooting up his spine.

“Mm?” Daisuke glanced at his boyfriend, wondering why the inspector suddenly chose to call him by his full name instead of the usual ‘bastard’, ‘pain in the ass’, ‘idiot’, or just ‘Kambe’.

‘Am I doing the right thing? Are we ready for this?’

“What is it, Haru?”

“Marry me.”

Daisuke’s eyes widened, and he stared at Haru without blinking even once. “... What?”

“I said,” Haru turned to look at him, giving him an awkward little grin before grabbing Daisuke’s hands in his own and slowly going on one knee, “Marry me, ‘Suke.”

That was all it took. That nickname.

Daisuke felt every tense nerve in his body relax almost immediately as the answer came as naturally to him as breathing.

“Okay.”

Daisuke’s gloved hand wraps around the glass, his soft lips placing themselves on its rim to take another sip of water. It’s probably his tenth sip in the last two minutes (and counting).

“Lord Daisuke, you look incredible!” Suzue remarks, and he sees her smile at him through the mirror.

“Mm.”

“I can’t believe you and Katou-sama are finally getting married.” Suzue steps up behind Daisuke to smoothen the non-existent wrinkles on the thick piece of blue fabric covering his shoulders.

‘I can’t either.’

“It feels like just yesterday when you came back to Japan,” she continues, not noticing the way Daisuke’s nervous fingers fiddle with his cufflinks, “And now it’s already been six years… time passed by too quickly, didn’t it?”

“It has.”

Silence descends over them like a calm cloud while Suzue busies herself by fussing around with his three-piece suit, straightening it more than it already is, rubbing off any invisible lints, fixing his already perfect tie - a crisp, sophisticated taupe - and Daisuke lets his mind wander off once again.

He thinks about the six years he’s spent in Japan. But more specifically, he thinks about the time he spent by his side.

He thinks of all their firsts; their first meeting, their first argument, the first time he let Haru fall (not for him, but off the bridge), their first show of trust, first confessions, first kisses, first everything.

He thinks of their life after they decided to become more than just friends or colleagues. All of the small ways in which Haru reminded him, every day, just how much he adored him. Daisuke thinks of all those cuddles, all the nuzzles, all the intertwining of fingers.

And before he can stop it, a smile - albeit small but so full of love you could feel it radiating off of him - is gracing his lips.

‘Thank you.’ He finds himself thanking Haru in both his mind and heart… for just about everything.

“Lord Daisuke, are you okay?” Suzue asks, snapping him out of his heartwarming walk down the memory lane.

“Yes, why?”

“Your eyes…” she trails off, and Daisuke’s gaze shifts from looking at her through the mirror to himself. A small gasp leaves his lips when he sees what’s got Suzue so worried about his eyes.

Tears.

A thin layer of unshed tears coats those calm eyes, and Daisuke feels his heart clench with absolute adoration when he realises the meaning behind such a blatant show of emotions.

These tears aren’t of pain. Or of agony. Or of suffering.

There are tears of gratitude. Of love. Of unrestrained joy at the mere thought of the wonderful man waiting for him at the same beach where he proposed.

“I’m fine, Suzue.” Daisuke says, his eyes never leaving the ones in the mirror. “I’m just… overwhelmed,” he admits, taking a deep breath in.

Suzue smiles. “I can understand. It IS a big day, after all.” She turns around, walking towards the door. “I’ll be outside.”

“Thank you,” he says, and he means it. He couldn’t be more grateful to have a sister who understood him so well that they didn’t need words to get their message across.

And with that, Suzue steps out of the room, closing the door behind her, leaving Daisuke alone with his thoughts.

His eyes travel to the clock on one of the walls of the gigantic room, and he sees that he’s still got some time before Hoshino would come by to escort him to his lover. And his fiance.

Daisuke feels another smile tugging at his lips at the word, and he briefly thinks about how he’s been smiling too much today before his mind again wanders off to the man responsible for making him smile so much.

‘He’s too good to me,’ Daisuke thinks, sighing fondly. ‘He makes me believe that it’s okay to feel this… that it’s okay to feel happy. Sometimes it feels like it’s too good to be true.’

And that’s when it strikes him. The one thought which makes his shoulders go stiff, and his lips press themselves together in a stiff line.

‘But… What if it IS too good to be true?’

Daisuke’s mind decides to take another walk down the memory lane, but this time the road isn’t filled with Haru’s smile, or his warmth. This time, the road is dark, cold, unwelcoming. It’s filled with every memory of each time things felt too good to be true… and they were.

‘What if… what if this doesn’t last?’ He thinks, the pictures of his own parents clouding every space they could find in his head.

Haru and him wouldn’t end the same way… right?

‘Would I be able to make Haru happy?’

… As happy as Haru made him?

‘Everything I ever cared for in my life was ripped away from me… Will Haru and I be the same way?’

He notices as his chest starts rising and falling at a faster pace, but he doesn’t pay it any mind.

‘Is it because I’ve been weak? I haven’t been able to protect the people important to me. I-I’ve never been good enough. What if… I still am not good enough?’

Daisuke’s eyes widen, terror seeping into them as his mind chooses to project a mental image of Haru walking, but not towards him. It’s an image of Haru having his back turned towards Daisuke, and he is walking away.

‘Am I even worthy of being loved?’

Daisuke thinks back on all the warm, loving moments that he thought of not even five minutes ago, but this time his mind focuses on his own actions instead of Haru’s

‘Haru has done so much to show me he loves me. How many times have I done the same?’

The back of his eyes burn so hard it feels like they’re on fire, and he finds it harder to breathe; he feels as if someone’s just wrapped their fingers around the base of his throat and is squeezing, hard.

‘Is Haru happy with me? WILL he be happy with me?’

His own fingers come up to his throat, as if trying to replace the invisible ones.

‘Should we even be getting married? What if he realises I’m not worth it?’

‘Where are you, Haru?’ is what his heart screams instead, but he doesn’t hear it.

‘O-oh god, I cannot be forcing him to marry me.’

‘I need you, Haru. Find me. Please, find me.’

‘He doesn’t love me. He shouldn’t be marrying me.’

‘Haru, please. Save me.’

I’m only one call away.

He doesn’t even notice his fingers finding the surface of his phone and he is too busy letting himself fall down the dark spiral his mind lay out for him to bother seeing what his fingers are doing with the phone.

Daisuke feels his feet give away, and he slowly slides down to the floor. His body trembles, his breathing continues to quicken, and he feels something dark crawl up his spine.

It’s something he can’t describe, but it’s so dark and so… consuming. He feels like his mind is being ripped into shreds, as if someone is slowly claiming their control over it.

“H-Haru…” He whimpers and looks up, closing his eyes. He feels the thick layer of tears forming beyond his lids collapse as silent tears stream down his face. He opens his mouth to breathe, but the inhale turns into a choked sob.

He wasn’t good enough. He isn’t good enough. And he never will be good enough.

Daisuke bites his trembling lips and brings his knees closer to his body in an attempt to hide away from himself.

Hah. What a pitiful sight. And Haru thought THIS weak little boy would be good enough for him? He should leave him while he still has time.

“Haru… please. I need you. Pl-Please don’t leave m-”

“I wasn’t planning to.”

I’ll be there to save the day.

Daisuke’s head snaps in the direction of the voice; a voice powerful enough to break the hold of what was slowly crawling through his mind, consuming him whole.

“Haru…” he whispers, blinking the tears away in an attempt to clear his vision.

The attempt is futile anyway, because the moment his sight comes into focus, he feels a pair of all too familiar arms pull him into a strong chest. “I’m right here,” Haru murmurs, pressing a kiss to his forehead before sitting down in front of him and pulling Daisuke between his legs.

“I-” Daisuke’s eyes widen, confusion slowly colouring over every other thought for the moment. “Wasn’t it Hoshino who was supposed to come?”

“You really expect me to ask Hoshino to check in on you when you call my number and then say my name the way you said it?”

‘I called him?’

“You sounded like someone was forcefully pulling every ounce of life out of you.”

“... I did?”

‘Yes, you bastard. You scared the living fucks out of me, y’know?’ Haru thinks, but instead of saying anything, he only pulls Daisuke closer to him.

He smiles when he feels Daisuke return the gesture.

Daisuke’s arms wrap around Haru’s neck and he places his face in the crook of his neck, taking a deep sniff of the latter’s scent. He feels his panic flow out of his body as the warmth of the man himself washes over his entire being.

“H-Haru-” the millionaire stutters, tears again filling his eyes, now that he’s had a moment for everything to catch up to him. Haru’s arms only pull him closer, as close as physically possible, and that’s when Daisuke notices some things he didn’t see earlier.

“You’re safe. I’m here. I’m with you. And I’m not going anywhere.” Haru speaks in between pants, his forehead covered with a thin, barely there layer of sweat.

‘He RAN all the way here?’ Daisuke thinks, taking in every bit of whatever Haru offered him; his love, his warmth, his confidence, his belief in them.

Superman got nothin’ on me.

“Haru.” Daisuke pulls his head back to look at the taupe-haired man.

“What?” Haru replies, his head still facing down. He doesn’t look up, and Daisuke can only wonder why.

“Look at me.”

“No.”

“Haru.”

“No.” “I love you.”

Haru’s head snaps up at the speed of light, his eyes so wide Daisuke fears his eyeballs might pop out of their sockets.

But now that Haru’s finally looking at him, Daisuke takes the opportunity to find out for himself why the man absolutely refused to look up at him just moments ago.

He feels all the air drain out from his lungs at the findings of his inspection.

‘He’s trembling.’

“I was so scared, Kambe,” Haru whispers, his head dropping on Daisuke’s shoulder. “I was so scared when I heard you sound so… weak.”

“I love you.” Daisuke repeats, and this time it’s him who places a kiss on the other man’s forehead.

“I love you too.”

Haru looks up, and their lips come together so naturally and so perfectly, one would think it was meant to be. And maybe it was.

And just like that, they sit there for a few minutes, wrapped up in their own warm little bubble, the world forgotten.

“Oi, Kambe,” Haru murmurs into Daisuke’s shoulder, successfully catching the attention of the shorter man. “What really happened?”

Daisuke sucks in a sharp breath, knowing exactly what Haru was talking about. The fingers holding on to Haru tighten a little more as he opens his mouth, and begins explaining what actually went down.

Daisuke speaks, and speaks. He expresses every minute detail, because he knows Haru is listening. Haru always listens. And he doesn’t just listen, he makes sure the other knows that he is there for him no matter what.

I’m only one call away.

Once he is done telling Haru everything, he looks at him with baited breath, trying to gauge Haru’s reaction. The only answer he gets is utter confusion as Haru pulls back from their embrace and stands up, brushing the barely-there dust off his suit. He looks down at his lover and extends a hand out to him.

But instead of grabbing that hand, Daisuke’s eyes get lost in the very gorgeousness of sight Haru Katou presents. Haru’s dressed in a three-piece suit, just like Daisuke himself, but it’s taupe in colour. His tie is the same blue as Daisuke’s suit, and he looks downright ravishing.

“We haven’t got all day, idiot.”

Haru sighs, grabbing Daisuke by the hand and pulling him up. He quickly wipes Daisuke’s tears and makes him look presentable (as if he wasn’t already) before dragging him to the door.

Haru opens the door to the dressing room, but before they can step out, Daisuke stops him.

“What are you doing?” Daisuke asks, his brows furrowed and the usual disinterest back on his face.

“Walking down the aisle with my bride.”

“You do know that you’re not supposed to be the one escorting me.”

“Yeah, and what about it?”

“Katou Haru. Are you joking with me?”

Haru turns around to meet Daisuke’s eyes and pulls the shorter man to him with one tug on his arm. He bends his head, giving Daisuke a quick kiss before pulling back and whispering, “Why? Is there a problem?”

Daisuke isn’t even given the time to blush, because Haru is already turning on his feet and walking down the hallway, pulling the millionaire behind him. They keep walking for a short while, even after they leave the building and step onto the beach, before Haru finally comes to a stop.

“We’re here.”

Daisuke pokes his head from behind Haru’s back to see where exactly they are. “Oh my sweet bleeding heart.”

“Of all things in the world, that’s the first thing you say, rascal?”

“Haru, I-” Daisuke is quite literally at a loss for words, because right now, in this very moment, in front of him is a low stage setup with curtains falling around it in a circular fashion, and tiny fairy lights giving it it’s very own magical glow. It’s like a world within a world. A world away from everyone, from everything - a world for just the two of them.

“Come on, you and make it anywhere. But for now… we can stay here for a while.” Haru mutters, glancing at Daisuke, “'Cause you know, I just wanna see you smile.”

“Very cheesy, I’ll give you that,” Daisuke chuckles, stepping on to the stage. “So…” he turns to look at Haru, “What now?”

“Dance with me.” Haru says, and then there is no going back.

All it takes is a nod from Daisuke and Haru steps closer to him, wrapping an arm around his waist.

“What is it?” Haru asks, noticing the furrow of Daisuke’s brows.

“We have no music.”

“I got it covered,” is all Haru says before snapping his fingers, and almost immediately, music fills the space around them.

“What song is this?” Daisuke asks, letting Haru pull him in by the waist and following his lead.

“Doesn’t matter. Focus on the lyrics. Oh, and me, of course.”

And so Daisuke does.

I'm only one call away I'll be there to save the day

Daisuke’s eyes stare into Haru’s as their feet move together, and he smiles at the lyrics, letting the other man know just how much he loves him. And this. Just how grateful he is for it all.

Superman got nothin' on me

And Daisuke can’t help but agree with that. His fingers gip Haru’s a little tighter as he sighs, his head coming to rest on the other’s shoulder.

I'm only one call away

Call me, baby, if you need a friend I just wanna give you love

“I love you,” Daisuke whispers at that, pressing a kiss to where his forehead rested just a moment ago.

Come on, come on, come on Reachin' out to you, so take a chance

Daisuke pulls back a couple of steps, only to have Haru reach his arm out. He grabs it, doing a slow spin and falling into the arms of the man he loves more than his life could possibly define.

No matter where you go You know you're not alone

“I love you too.”

Silence soon falls between them and they both close their eyes, letting the music be their voice.

Come along with me and don't be scared I just wanna set you free

Come on, come on, come on You and me can make it anywhere

Realisation finally dawns on Daisuke as he realises where Haru’s words from earlier really came from. He smirks.

But for now, we can stay here for a while, ayy 'Cause you know, I just wanna see you smile

“You’re just a giant ball of sap, aren’t you?” He retorts, looking up at Haru. He might be smirking, but even he can’t hide the affection that swells up in his eyes as his hands reach up to wrap around Haru’s neck, allowing the latter to snake both his arms around Daisuke’s waist.

“Shut up.”

And when you're weak, I'll be strong I'm gonna keep holdin' on

“I’ll never let you go, Katou.”

Now don't you worry, it won't be long, darlin' And when you feel like hope is gone

Haru smiles, pulling Daisuke closer to him.

Just run into my arms

“Funny, because I don’t plan to let you go either, bastard.”

I'm only one call away I'll be there to save the day

“You really are a hero, you know, Haru?”

Superman got nothin' on me

“Just yours, ‘Suke. Just yours.” Haru murmurs, closing his eyes and pressing his forehead against Daisuke’s.

I'm only one, I'm only one call away

“Forever.” Daisuke replies, his own eyes slowly shutting.

“And ever.”

Fin.

DONTCHA WORRY THEY DID GET MARRIED IN THE END THEY DIDNT FORGET ABOUT IT

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twinklelilstarkey · 3 years

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Rita i dont know how you do this. how do u wrote do much??? pls my writing is nothing compared to yours istg 💔

My inspiration and patience for writing literally come in waves. I have moments where I cannot write a single word and others where I write a tone. Thankfully, I'm having a peak on both right now (hope I don't jinx it) and I'm trying to use the most of it.

Also, I've learned, recently, to not push myself constantly until I burn out and to be patient with myself every time I open any sort of draft or document. For example: if I can't find the words for this story 'right now', I'll try another one; and if that also doesn't work, I'll try again in a few hours/tomorrow.

I have a lot of free time too and, while my family is working, I have an empty silent house to work in. It's pretty easy to get in the mood to write when I have that much peace, sometimes.

And, now directly at you Ms. Amelia, you honestly write so well. I remember reading one of your firsts posts some time ago and literally being starstruck by it. You're an amazing writer, swear to God. But if you need any sort of advice: never stop what you're doing (even when you're about to have a breakdown). Try to write at least a sentence [you're satisfied with] every day and you'll improve like crazy that way. If you do stop for a long time, it might feel okay at first, but when you come back, it will be hell to get the hang of everything and like your own writing again (especially if you read other authors while in your break - speaking of experience). But again, you're amazing already! so you don't even have to stress about this!!!

LOVE YOOOU

#Rita socializes

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botheredbuck · 4 years

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@oihalfway and @calangelhighway

for the both of u lovely people!!

@oihalfway

i must of course begin this by congratulating you on a perfect url. yes please. thank u (every time i see ur blog i hear it in ben’s voice istg it’s the best). anyway, your blog is genuinely just the loveliest place of positivity, the amount of love you spread within this fandom is so freaking lovely. you are wonderfully talented (okay i tried to find some of your stuff but my computer is being a lil bitch but i am sure there have been some prompts that you have written that have been AMAZINg) and i cannot wait to see your big bang, it’s going to be wonderful.

@calangelhighway

a TALENT!! firstly your blog is so lovely and wonderful, and the positivity that you spread is amazing. you are honestly a truly amazing writer though, like what!! i’m pretty sure you’re fed up of me bringing up it’s a kind of magic on these things so i took a lil scroll, and honestly home is where the heart is at peace makes me all soft and asjdhkajhk DAD!CALLUM. yes please, thank you. you’re amazing.

send me an @ and i’ll send them some positivity 😌

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2elements-blog · 5 years

Text

Stray Kids reaction | to their S/O always stealing their clothes

//Authors Note//

This is so cute, and here its also such a mood. Rain is coming, so its gonna be so cute<3 Thanks for the request, we will try our best<3(BTW IM LIVING FOR THAT EMOJI I CANNOT)(ALSO we are so sorry for the wait, it’s been almost a year. we still hope you love it)

The ones who haven't been gotten their request done, we will get done with them at some point, hopefully soon, but don't worry^^

-2E

WARNINGS: FLUFf, like a lot of fluff and love and Uwus’, are all over the place. Again. What did you expect? XD

ENJOY FELLOW STAYS

Chan

He would love when you stole his clothing. The way you always hid the fact you did, made him think you just missed him. Which you did of course. When you would wear it he would take his phone out and capture the perfect moment. Either you would look adorable, or you would look like a potato. Well no matter what he definitely shows it off to the guy. He would just be really soft about how you just would be swallowed in his clothing and how much it meant for you to have something close reminding you of him since he isn't much around.

“GUYS, look how cute Y/n is” Pulling out his phone, and showing off his new picture of you on his phone, you would curl into a ball since you were just beside him.

Amazed chuckles gather around the boys, saying how adorable it was. But you knew which picture it was, and it wasn't exactly charming.

You started to pout, getting your boyfriends attention.

“Hey what’s wrong- It's a good picture” He shows you, and you just scoff at him, burying yourself in the same hoodie as in the picture.

“I look like a swallowed naked bird,” You say, looking away from Chan as the whole room starts to laugh from your comment. Anyone but Chan could see what you meant. He is just that in love with you.

“Ohhh... Well, you are my swallowed naked bird” Chan says, hugging you into his body.

“Ewww, that sounded wrong” You shout trying to pull yourself away from him. Failing.

“You started it” He laughs as you stop moving around, surrendering to his hug.

“I swear, you guys are so disgusting sometimes” Minho takes his phones out, taking a shot at what all of the boys are being displayed with.

“You better send that!” Chan points and the boy who just snatched a photo of you two.

Woojin

He wouldn’t really mind, but would definitely notice it when you had put it on. Though he would be slightly confused as to why his clothes suddenly disappeared in the presence of you. He would hug you. Like, just a long soft hug from Woojin your way because he loves how he would see you in his clothes. He would cherish every moment of it, but he does that no matter what. Long story short, he just admires you when you do. (He is so soft, I swear on everything if he isn't boyfriend material than I’m not blonde. okay bad example, but I am blonde, HAIR, blonde hair.)

“So, what’s your plan?” You ask as it’s his turn to decide the date. As you run to him outside your door, you meet Woojin’s smiling face as he just looks

Having put on a pair of light washed jeans, and his oversized hoodie you just threw on. It smelled nice, and it fits you, even being oversized. You didn’t think anything of it. You always stole his clothes.

“Why are you smiling like an idiot?” You say, brushing the tint of pink off your face. He just takes your hands and softly kisses them both pulling you into a hug.

“You okay, there? you are especially cuddly today” Saying that, you try your best not to be flustered by your situation.

“I just love you-” He whispers.

“And I realized you just look adorable in my shirt” He pulls you out of the hug and gives you a heart-filled smile. Swearing internally, you blush and hit playfully his arm which he just plays off. Kissing the top of your head, he drags you to his car, going to a little date adventure. (OKAY I’M SOFT FOR HIM EVERYONE LOVE HIM)

Minho/Lee Know

THIS BOY THOUGH would steal it back. Just as you nearly touch it, he grabs it and keeps it as his baby. I don't think he would be much of a fan of it. But he secretly loves seeing you in it, he just wants it back right after. The normal scenario would be you sneakingly moving your way to his drawer when you are at a visit, but he would stop you. Cuddle suffocation, or a huge amount of tickles your way.

“Y/n! Have you seen my-” Before finishing his sentence, he sees a curled up bundle covered with a duvet.

“Your what?” A head appears from under the big duvet. Your head to be exact. A giggle leaves Minho’s mouth, as he walks up beside your bed. You just look at him in confusion.

“My sweater Babe- You know, the one you usually have no matter how many times I steal it back” He looks at you with suspicious eyes, crossing his arm as if he is expecting something.

“Pffff, yeah, no- I have no idea what you mean” You play it off, very badly mind I add. You look across the other side of the room, putting a strand of hair behind your ear.

“Oh really. Then what was that sleeve?” Looking mischievously at you, he reaches for your hand and you start to laugh as if you were surprised. You weren't. You keep stealing his clothes, so it doesn't come to a surprise.

“Oh wow- how did that land there. That is so strange” Trying to get under the covers again, you were stopped by your boyfriend who was now slamming his body down on you. From other experiences like this before, you were in for a ton of laughter the next 10+ minutes.

“You never learn- TICKLE FIGHT”

Changbin

He wouldn’t mind much, but be totally into the idea of it. He would be really confused who took his clothes- (Felix or you, who knows)But as he would find out who took it, he wouldn't care much. Though he would tell you to give it back when he needed it. But we all know you would try to hide it okay, don’t give me that look, we all know I'm right. Also, because he only partly minds you taking his clothes, the other side of him makes him so soft when he sees you in his clothing. Cherishes you and snatches a few hugs and there might also be a kiss incoming.

“I’m keeping these pants and this shirt” As you walk into the living room in mostly his clothes, you make CHangbins eyes go wide, and his mouth is making an O shape surprised by your entrance.

“Yah, why are you wearing my clothes,” He says, still holding his phone as his eyes wonder on you.

Striking a pose, you smile and put peace signs up on your face.

“I was having a makeover moment with your clothes” Winking at your boyfriend, still holding your pose, he shakes his head down in his hands.

“Sometimes I wonder why I fell for you” Cracking a giggle under his breath he receives an overdramatic huff from you.

“Awe, come ooon Y/n, you know I’m joking” He stands up and starts to walk your way, but you just cross your arms, still overdramatizing your mad face.

“Fine- but I’m keeping these” Saying that, you face smirks at your boyfriends who is now in front of you with a smile on his own lips.

“You wish” As he says those words, he places a peck on your nose, giving out a huge hug. He might not admit it, but you look really cute.

Hyunjin

This one isn’t as tricky as the two others. He wouldn’t mind at all, but when you did steal his clothes he would complain. But only for a few seconds because afterwards, he would be a blushing mess. He loves it, and you know it so you tease him a bit. But I would be lying if cuddles weren't coming your way. In the presence of the group members or not, you where in for hugs my dear.

“I’m opening Chan!” Hyunjin shouts as the ring on the door gets louder.

you are on the other side pressing the doorbell- You are there to join the guys for a silent night. Just watching some movies, play some games. What you usually would do when they all had a free night. Plus, you wouldn’t pass a chance to have a night with your boyfriend, Hyunjin.

“Y/n! I missed you” The door opens and you are already attacked in hugs by Chan, earning a laugh from you. Not what you expected but, you aren't complaining.

“Hyung!” Behind the blonde boy is a very complaining Hyunjin, making you chuckle from his frustration.

“I just wanted a hug- She smells like you anyway” Chan being his melodramatically self, pushes you, with fake tears towards you boyfriend who notices why the smell is so familiar.

You are wearing his t-shirt, a black one, a plain black one. Pairing it with a cowboy jacket.

“I wondered where that went- I can’t have anything from you” Hyunjin complains as he shakes his head, receiving a hit on his left shoulder from you. He loved that shirt on you.

“Be happy I put up with you” You stick your tongue out at him, but what you get it is a tight hug. You shockingly stand still but hugs him back just seconds after.

“I did miss you” He whispers, were around the room occasional “ew’s” were shared.

Jisung/Han

Jisung just plainly loves it. It’s obvious. He doesn't care, as long as you are his, you can take whatever clothes he has and he won't care that much. But he does think it's super adorable when you try and hide it from him. He just loves you in his clothes, makes him feel useful if you can say that? Makes him feel even more a part of you. Just imagine his big goofy smile while looking at you. Yes, that's Jisung when you steal his clothes. (ISTG this boy is adorable with that smile)

“Jisung...” As you enter his dorm, and walk to his room, just flopping your way to him by his side. Wearing one of his red sweaters, looking even more swallowed in it then what you usually do.

Putting away whatever he had in his hands, he looks at you with confused eyes.

As much as you loved wearing his clothes, having him close to you, you just missed him. Needed some hugs.

“Hey Y/n, I didn’t know you would be here- Did you write?” As he checks his phone, but end up even more confused.

“No, I just missed you- sorry to come by unnoticed” You shrug your shoulders as you sit down on his bed. Laying down very drowsy, Jisung lets out a giggle. Leaving his desk he sits beside you, adoring your sleepy state.

“Don’t think about it- I see my shirt wasn't enough” Laying down, smiling by your very weird appearance, he lets his hands slide around you, pulling you into a hug. Facing away from Jisung, you could still feel his smile that was placed in the crook of your neck. Making you smile as well.

“I love you,” He says, feeling the vibration around your neck, you giggle, since it tickled.

“You too- Sometimes” you smirk, and let a little ‘kidding’ out after that, making Jisung squishing you closer.

“You smell so good”

“Jisung, that is your perfume”

Felix

And Felix. Where do I start? He would have clothes just for you. Like a bundle of hoddies, sweaters, t-shirts and sweatpants he would sort just for you. Because oh man the boy loves to see you in his clothes. As much as you are his no.1 fan, he is also yours. Especially in his big hoodies. KISSES AND CUDDLES OKAY, and maybe a few video games because that's what those clothing bundles are for, more home dates with Felix. That’s what he intended for it to be at least.

“That’s it, we are staying home” About to grab some shoes and a jacket, Felix put everything back when he sees you.

“Wha- Felix what is that about?” You squint your eyes in confusion.

“You can’t just go around in my clothes and assume we have to go out- No, either cuddles or video games” He proclaims, too seriously, making you crack a smile.

“You are such a child I swear” As you put down your shoes, you walk up to him, kissing his cheek casually. Walking back into your apartment, your boyfriend following you from behind.

“Excuuuuse me- You are the one snatching my clothes,” He says, giggling while crossing his arms.

“Felix, you gave me this” You cross your arms as well.

“Because you look good in it!” He says again, shaking his head.

“And still every time I wear it we have to stay home-” you stick your tongue out at him, with him shaking you off. These ‘arguments’ was a big part of your relationship. It was always a party.

“Both it is” Finishing the talk, he places a soft kiss on your shoulder as you sit down. He smiles at you, but you just roll your eyes at him.

Seungmin

Okay, he loves you don’t get that wrong, but- He is savage about his clothes. Especially his hoodies. You would finally have been able to snatch one, but before you knew it he would snatch it back, or he would try and embarrass you by stealing one of your shirts and wear it. Seungsavage on the way(Ida’s nickname yall, she needs a medal for that).

“Hi, I’m Y/n” Seungmin enters the living room that is filled with the rest of the group. And of course you as well.

“Dear god” You whisper to yourself as your boyfriend makes an appearance. The rest of the room was filled with laughter.

Seungmin is wearing your pink hoodie, your uncle sent to you from abroad. You never had worn it outside your room, because it was too pink for your taste- Not to mention the words “pink goddess” was written across the chest. You loved it, but no human should see it.

“God Seungmin, please put it back” you start as your hands move up to cover your bright red face.

“What? I can’t hear you- “ He says, putting his hand to his ear. Looking beside you is a ‘dead from laughing’ Jisung.

“I thought you loved me” reaching for a pillow to throw at him, he easily catches it looking to the side of it smiling directly at you. Huffing him off, you cross your arms, that mind I add, is covered in his hoodie since you have been wearing it all day.

“Awe, I do” He runs over to your side puppy eyes plastered to your eyes.

“Oh really now-”

“I just wanted to show how great we match when we share clothes” He smirks and positions a kiss on your forehead while you are still sulking.

Jeongin/I.N

He would like it. Love you in his shirts, giggle as you would wear them. Being teased by his members by the shyness he would be enchanted with. He would admire you even more than what he did before. You are his star and his hoddie proves that as well. SHY LITTLE FOX UGH

“What are you guys doing” As you enter the kitchen in just a pair of shorts and Jeongin’s t-shirt, his eyes grow wide. You entered just the right time as he was talking about you to Jisung and Hyunjin who was now a giggling mess.

“Uh- I mean, we were just... Talking about-” As the youngest tries to explain he is cut off by two things. You hugging him from behind, and Hyunjin who takes the word.

“You- He was talking about you and his clothes” Looking up from behind your boyfriend you notice his ears turning red.

You squish him a little, realising your grip as you walk beside him instead.

“Oh really-” looking at Jeongin, as flustered he is, he buries his face in his hands. You just smirk.

“Oh yeah. He wouldn’t stop talking, like, we like you, but he won’t shut up abo-” Jisung starts, and before you know it, Jeongin took your hand and left the two to chuckle by themselves.

“I didn’t know you had such a huge crush on me” you tease as he brings you to his room. It was just a joke since you guys have been dating for a few months.

“And I didn’t know where that shirt was, but I guess I found it” He drags you into him, hugging you, nuzzling his face in your hair that is covering your neck.

You hug him back, still giggling a bit.

“You look so amazing in my shirt”

#stray kids #bang chan #kim woojin #lee know #Lee Minho #seo changbin #hwang hyunjin #han jisung #lee felix #kim Seungmin #i.n #yang jeongin #stray kids fluff #stray kids reactions #kpop reactions

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