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#i didnt have to literally break his heart to do that
parkinglothater · 1 year
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i feel like ive hit a mjor reset button my life and its literally tearing me apart
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dirt-str1der · 2 years
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What ive learned about the yakuza community is that you guys are way too hung up over that scene in y4 where he pinned haruka to the ground then started panting really heavily , that didnt happen for me , that scene wasnt real to me i forgot about it.
#Yakuza loveblog#it literally didnt happen for me like the game could have been perfect without it so i took it out#like how could you not like saejima he... he would be the perfect man if not for that scene#but it WOULD be funny to make haruka have beef with both majima (kidnapped her) and saejima (lowkey assaulted her)#saejima wouldnt do that .. he loves kids ...#i adore saejima i think hes super cool and extremely hardcore. more hardcore than kiryu even and kiryu is extremely hardcore#saejima was the first to almost die in the snow but unlike kiryu he didnt even get frostbite#well he did a bit but it wasnt that bad ... kiryus fingers were one hard press from having the flesh slough right off#anyway HOW CAN ANYONE NOT LIKE SAEJIMA HES SO COOOOOOL#Hes so charismatic and you can tell the depths of his empathy are unfathomable ... he looks at someone with sorrow and you know his heart#is breaking. he always gets so serious and sombre when hes trying to convince someone not to go down a dark path#my stomach HURTS. see saejima could have given me medicine because he is so kind#you have got to forgive him for pinning haruka to the ground with his knee between her legs like you need to forgive him#that was a slipup he was never planning on doing anything and he was very sorry for it ... i swear to you he just froze up he wasnt planning#on touching her or anything ... you know whos truly to blame ? kiryu. for standing there once again like a stone starue and letting it happe#hey ‘suzuki’ (lol thats a good one i might steal it later) i know youre an escaped convict because of the animalistic look in yout eye when#you pinned my twelve year old daughter to the ground and slobbered on her. and not the other telltale signs like you wearing a prisoners#outfit when you washed up on shore (lol) no there were no other clues. that was what tipped me off#hated kiryu in y4 he is useless. i will never forgive him. see saejima was panicking because haruka was going to call an ambulance. kiryu#had a cool head and he still decided to do some stupid shit. too bad i badly want men who make bad decisions and want to fuck kiryu so much
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chiistarri · 6 months
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imsoo normal about guys byw
#sprry this is the start of my downfall im actually going to theow up and vomit and die#fronting daily actually sucks!and i have no restraint on my curiiusity and i have to figure shit out and i literally want to die#cause like i found out shit i didnt want to and its entirely my fault too bro i cant even be upset cause i went looking for it ughhh#i should be allowed to die afterschool so i dont have to feel anything else tbh thatd be a pleasure great thing whwatever#this is genuinelky the repeat of my downfall again literally september all over again and its just march jesus fucking fhrist bro need todi#the nervous system is so dumb what is ooottfvgvsh or whagevr i hate that dumbass acronym i hate healrhcare#serenity save me 🙏 save me serenity 🙏 come home#everyone keeps sayng that but qith donald trump#anyway back to me i need to scream and not just to serenity cause i feel bad🤭 no emojis are tood enougu anymore bro im going to kms#killing myself so fucking hard like a vampire driving a stake through his heart sort of shit ykwim like a siren drowning ro sokething poeti#save me sid 🙏 sid save me actually hed laugh at me for hthis lowkey which is soo deserved cause real bro why am i breaking down at midnight#on a dchool day too bro again and again i dont want to go to mf schooll and be obsessed w k. hes fine but i genuinely cant do my work#lowkey would iet be weird to talk to my ex ab my relationship with him cause like yea i miss him ykwim and i need closure but i got a crush#cause like on one hand its like i was the one who brokenup ykwim like even if the circumstances werewei4d whatever its like why would i hav#the right to even bring it up and i alr crushed on a new guy and like ignoring the uguult i do like him ughh broni want to kms#i love love i just dont love lvoe for myself cause ugh bro i hare one guy idc ab his crushes but he made me hear ab them lke idc idek him#sorry u had a bad experience w bi girls like idk what u want me to say ??? surprise me too ??? tff ugh i hate love girls#i need a gf but the thoigjt of liking a girl genuinely deeply scares me to my core cause i like girls but ppl dont like that i do ykwim#all mu friends are fucking gay bro idek why im so worried ab liking girls like who is there to disappoint but myself and my entire family#noo pressure qt all being oldest and queerest like ok yeah its midnight happy new years. i need this blanket tobsuffocste me#sleep wrappedup alr like a borito burito i dek and its not enoughh i need a soul crushing embrafe to sleep#ok im done i got post vent clarity i need to sleep#post#erics tag#delete later#serenity needs this as a ref in the morning#i beed my mom to cry to but j cant tell her any of this id rather be eaten alive by bugsbro and if i just cry to her without a reason#shell fs go througj my phone and fimd out why anyway so wjats the pointtt my god i tqlk too much and vent too much#gota flair forbthe dramatics ivguess mb
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lovecrazedpup · 8 months
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i dont want to sleep
#im like a toddler LMAO throwing things around my room bc im so fucking angry and upset#(im throwing a plushie into my bed but still)#i genuinely think i want to breakup like idk this isnt even a joke or looking for reassurance anymore#like maybe im weird for thinking abt a long term relationship and marriage at 18 but ....#we arent ? very compatible ? long term ?#its unfair to him if i keep this going considering hes a bit older than me yk#nvm im writing this out and im crying maybe i DONT want to break up#im tired of overthinking and obsessing over everything . im tired of seeing him as better than me and perfect . i want to be equals#i just want to be normal and to be in a normal relationship where we do normal things#i just want support i want love i want literally ANYONE to tell me that im ok and that im loveable#i hate our stupid time difference and his stupid job i wish i was like this earlier on in the day it is AWFUL being alone#my head hurts and my throat hurts and i hurt#i want to scream and cut and stab someone#i fucking hate her#so much#shes a fucking bitch i wish i could kill her . like genuinely . i want to pull out her teeth lmao if she didnt exist id be happier#GOD i want to stop comparing myself to her and thinking abt them together but ill always be a second experience and its depressing#'youll be my first for anal' yeah great bc thats exactly what i want to fucking hear#not doing much to stop the 'you only want me for sex' thoughts but YEP GREAT THANKS#me : pouring my heart out and trying to say what im thinking !! him : haha yeah sex ! oh also have some inspirational quotes#god just kill me . get me out . i dont want to be here . i dont want to think abt him. i dont want to talk abt him .#i wish we never fucking met ! i wish i never picked up that stupid game#i dont want to lose you though#i hate how attached to him i am . why did you start talking to me again .#shouldve fucking forgotten me while youre fucking your friends and getting high up north island#cant say shit to him though bc itll be the end and ill probably kill myself bc i unfortunately live for him#its over when we meet anyways lol so i got ? 2 months ? 3 months ? of happiness before its gone#i think im gonna do smth bad but i doubt he would care at all . would probably be happy if i die or ghost him .#gives him an excuse to talk to his friends again lol . its so over for me#jamie.txt
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azulpitlane · 3 months
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be aggressive l ln4
lando norris x dcc!reader summary: the internet is curious as to why lando suddenly has an interest in american football, specifically with the dallas cowboys masterlist
f1gossip
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13,283 likes
f1gossip Lando Norris and Mclaren CEO, Zak Brown at the Dallas Cowboys game today in the AT&T stadium!!
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user his ass did not wanna be there😭
user lando?? american football?? huh???
user guys it was sponsored by hilton!! pretty sure thats why they attended
user makes sense cause bro looked miserable by the second half of the game
user a strange strange sight
user mf was bored the whole game except when the cheerleaders performed LMFAO
user the video of him locking in as soon as they stepped out in the field💀 ↪user WHERES THE VIDEO HAHAH? ↪user the video is all over twitter, cameraman did him dirty lmfao
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yourusername
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liked by landonorris and 12,379 others
yourusername victory sunday💙🤍💙
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user lesss goooo cowboys
user FAVE DCC
user in y/n we trust🧎‍♀️
user wait a minute- lando what are you doing here?!?
user no cause i noticed that too👀
user obsessed with you
user patiently waiting for the lando girlies to realize he followed her immediately after tonights game
user poor lando didnt get the follow back tho😭😭
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yourusername
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liked by landonorris and 19,382 others
yourusername first ever grand prix!!! such a delight to perform for these lovely faces✨
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user you guys made paying hundreds of dollars for a ticket worth it tbh
user icons
user another lando like, jolene im begging you pls dont take my man😔
user its the other way around for me😩 lando needs to back off my girl
user 🔥
landonorris amazing performance😍
user oh we're getting bold??? user down bad lando is my favorite lando fr user OMGGG FUTURE WAG Y/N??
user STOP is she the reason lando went to that cowboys game a few weeks ago
user going to her games and they're not even dating yet, gotta respect the game tbh😭
user sorry to break girls' hearts but there's videos of her and lando talking at the gp and he was blushing and giving her heart eyes the whole time
user literally came to her account cause of that video HAHAH
landonorris
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liked by danielricciardo, maxfewtrell and 930,482 others
landonorris 'murica
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user PASSENGER PRINCESS LANDO???
user ARE THOSE DCC BOOTS IN THE LAST SLIDE???
user it HAS to be the cheerleader he just followed cause they wear the exact same boots ↪user her name is Y/N!! put some respect in our dcc queen's name ↪user yes maam🫡, i apologize for my ignorance as a brit
user lando in a cowboy hat?? SHOW IT TO ME NOW RACHEL
maxfewtrell man you never let me drive when youre in the car
landonorris yeah cause i dont trust u maxfewtrell YOUVE KNOWN ME LONGER THAN Y/N??this comment has been deleted
user did max just confirm it is y/n THEE DCC in the last slide🧍‍♀️
user LMFAOO i know lando gave him an earful after that deleted comment user too late for him to delete, I HAVE IT PRINTED OUT! Y/N AND LANDO CONFIRMED
user streets are saying it's y/n in the last slide... we lost her guys😔
user AND WE LOST HER TO A BRITISH MAN💔💔
user now we wait for y/n to follow him and start soft launching too
danielricciardo glad i trusted the process
landonorris TOLD YOU user i hate when they comment inside jokes, got me feeling left out :(
user wait the way he let her drive even though hes said before he hates not being in control, meaning he already trusts her🥹
user i love her already omg
user lando dating an american cheerleader is actually the most lando thing ever
yourusername
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liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell and 18,392 others
yourusername current side mission: turning a brit into a texan
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user bae just tag lando norris, we know it's him
user NOO I WAS HOPING IT WAS JUST RUMORS💔
user girl lando does not know who you are ↪user i was talking about y/n ↪user oh sorry, valid reaction tbh
user the matching pictures of her driving and him as the passenger princess on his post omg this is the most perfect soft launch i fear
user i waited for 3 and half years for her and white man did it in one week😩
user her soft launching as if max didnt already confirm it on landos post
yourusername shhh just pretend you didn't see that, cant have my soft launch ruined ↪user sorry maam, whatever you say maam
user lando is so posh but she has him driving dirt bikes and going to rodeos HAHAHHA
user the way he looked just watching a football game was hilarious, i cant even imagine a rodeo
user as a european f1 fan, can someone explain why she's so loved? (IM ASKING IN THE NICEST WAY POSSIBLE I SWEAR)
user LOL she's a cheerleader for the dallas cowboys football team which is a huge deal here! it's pretty hard to join the squad but shes a fifth year veteran (about to retire after this year) and she's known as one of the sweetest and kindest leaders on the squad!! she also met lando at a game!
user does she know she has twitter freaking out with this post?
user not that im complaining but this is the first time i see an f1 couple getting so much love HOW AND WHY??
user well y/n is quite literally america's sweetheart
yourusername
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liked by landonorris, pietra.pilao and 23,492 others
yourusername one last christmas show🥹
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user what is dcc without y/n☹️
user gonna miss her so bad
user still looked amazing
user okay but is she still with that nascar driver or whatever cause wowwwww😍
landonorris yes, she is still with the FORMULA ONE DRIVER. ↪user OMG AN OFFICIAL CONFIRMATION???
pietra.pilao be with me please?
landonorris 🤨
landonorris woah woah you didnt say you were gonna post this one??? you look too good???
yourusername what happened to not commenting on each other's post until the hard launch🙂 (but ty ily) landonorris i take that back. (ily more) ↪user theyre losers but i love them your honor
footballplayer 🔥
landonorris yeah nice try🤣
user landos fighting for his life in these comments HAHA
user he fr ruined y/n's soft launch cause he cant handle these commenters hitting on her omfg
user kinda scared to comment, i dont want lando coming for me
user please dont be in love with someone else😩please dont have somebody waiting on you😩
landonorris she is in fact in love with someone else and does in fact have somebody waiting on her (ME) ↪user lando is a loser bf CONFIRMED
landonorris
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liked by yourusername, danielricciardo and 973,492 others
landonorris winter break means football games with my beautiful girl
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user finally the hard launch
user she literally is turning him into a texan GRAHHHH🦅🇺🇸
user *pretends to be shocked*
yourusername ILYYYYYYY
landonorris ❤️
user sad about her retiring dcc but happy we'll be getting so much WAG content
user OMG i didnt even think of this ↪user already imagining the paddock fits😩
user ig i have to accept shes officially taken :(
landonorris yeah. ↪user chill bro aint nobody taking her from you
user bro saw all the thrist comments on her last post and decided to hard launch
maxfewtrell ranch in texas when??
yourusername OMG SOON PLEASE @/LANDONORRIS?? ↪landonorris um idk about that ↪yourusername 🤨 ↪landonorris I MEANT ILL THINK ABOUT IT!! IT SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT IDEA😁🫶
user shes got him on a LEASH
danielricciardo ahh feels like yesterday that you bought tickets for the game AND the flight to have a 5 second interaction with the cute dcc
user damn lando was down bad wth😭 landonorris thank you for making this public information. ↪yourusername hey at least you beat the norizz allegations! eventually...
user as an american, im allowing you to count cota as your home race for bagging this queen
user oh lando norris i underestimated your game
User he gets the y'all pass now
landonorris THANK YALLLLLL
user the americanfication of lando is not something i knew i needed, but i did. thank you miss y/n
yourusername youre welcome, he will be listening to zach bryan and dolly parton in no time🫡
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notes: one thing about me is im gonna start getting lazy at the end of every smau i make. LOL. anyway i love american reader if you havent noticed already :)
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thewispsings · 3 months
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it’s never over | sebastian vettel
pairing: sebastian vettel x actress!reader
summary: ten fateful years ago, y/n and sebastian vettel broke up, breaking hearts all over the world. present day, y/n starts leaving small hints about finding another lover. the world goes crazy.
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liked by redbullracing, and 284,920 others!
ynandsebplscomeback: we are gathered here today, to mourn the loss of yn and sebastian vettels relationship. 10 years ago today, their breakup was announced, shattering the hearts of millions. please, we ask for a ten minute silence from you all, thank you.
view comments below!
user1: pls-i can’t take this rn 💔
user2: IT BEEN TEN YEARS??????
user3: ten depressing ass years
user4: the way we all thought they were coming back when they were sennas memorial tribute 🧍
user5: THEY WERE TALKING AND GIGGLING IT UP!!!!!! THEY TRICKED US 💔
redbullracing: 💔💔.
user6: i honestly think nobody was more hurt about the breakup then the redbull admin. they have been liking y/n+seb content since they broke up 😭😭
user7: THEY BROKE UP SO SEB COULD FOCUS ON HIS CAREER. HE NO LONGER HAS A CAREER SO THEY NEED TO GET BACK TOGHER RIGHT NOW.
user8: i remember when seb announced his retirement and everyone was so happy??? because this meant a more chance of y/n and him getting back together 😭
user9: i can’t do this right now. maybe tomorrow. not today.
user10: everyday i pray they get back together, today i will pray harder.
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liked by redbullracing, charles_leclerc, and 837,205 others!
yourusername: calm days 💗
view comments below!
user11: no….no…no this can’t be
user12: who tf is that
user13: WHAT IS THIS?? ON THE TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY?? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS
user14: m-maybe that’s seb?? pls cmon tell me it’s seb. y/n i beg.
user15: you’re dating another white man and it ISNT seb??? this is unacceptable.
redbullracing: why would you do this to me
yourusername: ?
user16: DONT. do not. question mark us right now.
user17: THAT ISNT SEB Y/N AND YOU KNOW IT.
user18: guys don’t worry!! that’s definitely seb!! just look at the finger tips…i compared them to other pictures of seb and it’s literally him!
user19: this is what crazy looks like
charles_leclerc: 🤩🤩
user20: WHAT DO YOU KNOW CHARLES
user21: SEE because if it WASNT seb charles definitely wouldn’t have commented. he’s the biggest y/n+seb shipper, behind the redbull admin ofc
user22: unless i see that man man’s face, and im 1003847% certain it isn’t seb. i will continue to believe that it is sebastian and they reconnected and are planning to live happily ever after 😝😝
user23: can you guys stop harassing y/n for moving on after 10 years 😑😑
user24: seb and y/n haven’t dated anyone since they split. i feel like it’s time for her to move on. this is good for her
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liked by yourusername, scuferiaferrari, and 962,927 others!
sebastianvettel: calmer days!
view comments below!
user25: wait a damn minute
user26: ITS HAPPENING STAY CALM EVERYONE STAY FUCKING CALM
user27: that’s y/ns leg. i fucking know it.
user28: AND HER HAND!! ITS HER FUCKING HAND GUYS!!
user29: WAR IS OVER
user30: omg wait i’m crying
user31: istg if this turns out to NOT be y/n. i will be killing myself.
redbullracing: are those the birds chirping? the sun shining?
user32: i know admin is jump in up and down in happiness
user33: OKAY GUYS WIAT WAIT WAIT J BEED TO PROCESS THIS. I NEED TIME
charles_leclerc: ❤️❤️
user34. HE KBEW!! HE FUCKING KNEW!!
user34: wait he knew….
user34: YOU FUCKING KNEW AND DIDNT SAY ANYTHING FOR GOD KNOWS HOW LONG?? YOU SICK SICK FUCK
user35: nobody will ever understand how happy i am right now
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liked by redbullracing, yourusername, and 1,730,026 others!
sebastianvettel: happy one year anniversary to my beautiful beautiful wife ❤️❤️ here’s to many more!
view comments below!
redbullracing: what
redbullracing: is this a joke?
redbullracing: please don’t mess with me like this
redbullracing: OMG
redbullracing: OH MY GOD
user36: holy. fucking. shit.
user37: you sick fuckers. YOU HAVE SEEN WHAT YOUR BREAKUP CAUSED AND ALL THIS TIME YOUVE BEEN MARRIED???
user38: FOR A WHOLE ASS YEAR NO LESS
user39: i don’t know if im happy that your married or mad that you LET ME THINK YOU WERE STILL BROKEN UP
user40: so many mixed emotions rn
user41: this is making my head hurt…in a good way
user42: THIS MEANS THEY WERE TIGTHER DURING THE SENNA TRIBUTE. I FUCKING KNEW IT.
charles_leclerc: happy one year 👏👏❤️
user43: okay but how did charles keep this a secret…
user44: RIGHT?? i feel liked he’d be the first to accidentally say something 😭
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liked by sebastianvettel, charles_leclerc, and 964,016 others!
yourusername: my beautiful beautiful husband 💗 one year down! many more to come!!
view comments below!
redbullracing: my god it’s real…
redbullracing: MY GOD ITS REAL
redbullracing: AHHHHHH
user45: this is the most relatable thing ever
user46; thank you gods 🙏🙏🙏
user47: ive reached peak happiness
user48: okay but when are we getting wedding pics???🤨
user49: NO FUCK THIS. i need a timeline of EVERYTHING. when they met, when the got together, when they b-broke up, WHEN THEY STARTED DATING AGAIN??, when they got engaged, AND WHEN THEY GOT FUCKING MARRIED???
user50: what kills me is that we will probably never get this information 💔💔
user51: i can die peacefully now, thank you y/n ❤️
. . .
notes; my first seb smau, hope you enjoy!! :)
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daisymbin · 14 days
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do you still love me? (I still love you) - choi seungcheol
warnings: mentions of insecurity, slight use of profanities, car accident, hospital, mentions of a needle (IV drip) & mention of anxiety attack.
pairing: choi seungcheol x female reader (use of she)
genre: exes to lovers, angst-ish, happy ending
word count: 2.3k
a/n: wanted to write for wonwoo but lollapalooza choi seungcheol won't let me, he is stuck and imprinted on my brain fr. I will do anything for that man....also this fic is loosely inspired by seventeen's happy ending.
requests open!
check out my masterlist!
“what? no! don't call him! are you crazy?” your hands frantically reached out to grab seungkwan at his hand that was holding his phone. “crazy? who's the one being crazy here? I can't believe this happened and you didn't even think to call me, if i hadn't call and asked to hang out I wouldn't even have known you'd gotten into an accident. are YOU crazy?? you just plan on lying on this hospital bed waiting to recover alone??” seungkwan whisper-shouted at you. “seungkwan please we already broke up, I don't want to bother him or give him any more burdens. besides, I don't even know if he will still care and to be honest, I don't want to know. I don't want to find out that he doesn't anymore so just let me live with my what ifs.” it's true, you'd rather not find out that he's moved on and doesn't care anymore than to know for sure that he doesn't care anymore. you don't think you have it in you to bare another heartbreak.
“you do know that he is still madly in love with you and that he asks me about you everyday still right? he is literally going to cuss me out if he finds out you're hurt and I didn't tell him. I don't even know why you broke up with him in the first place, you were both so good together!” seungkwan's words only filled your heart with more regret. you had broken up with seungcheol a little over 2 months ago but you both decided to stay friends for the sake of the boys. you had all been friends for too long, too many years to let them all go. seungkwan has been your best friend for over a decade and so was he with the boys, it was inevitable that you'd run into each other even if you tried to avoid him or them so this was your compromise.
it wasn't decided easily of course. when you first broke up, you had tried your hardest to avoid seungcheol at all costs, if he was going to be at a hangout, dinner or lunch, you would stop yourself from going bu seungcheol was persistent; begging that you'd at least be friends for the sake of the friend group & for his own sake as well, he couldn't stand not being able to see you or hear from you for too long. why the break up? to put it simply: you were insecure but that was just an understatement. every date you went on with him, every time you went out in public with him, pictures would inevitably find its way online. the comments were sweet, well most of them. for the rest? they were not so good & they started to eat at you everyday. you started to feel like you weren't good enough for him & that he could choose anyone and I mean anyone other than you, you just can't help but feel like he was settling for less with you. & slowly, this small insecurity grew so big that you started to distant yourself from him, avoid his hugs, his touches. when seungcheol finally had enough & asked you what was going on, you had decided on a whim to simply lie to him & told him you fell out of love with him.
you still remember the look of hurt that he had on his face that day and it haunts you every night before you close your eyes. almost immediately, you had wanted to take back what you had said, tell him whats really going on, you had so badly wanted to hug him so tight and to kiss the hurt away and yet, you didnt have it in you to continue being less for him when he deserved so much more.
“seungkwan you know why, just stop please just don't call him. it's just a small accident, I'll be fine once my leg heals.” you tried your absolute hardest to assure him, to convince and persuade seungkwan, but he's your best friend afterall. he knows you're not okay. “it's not just a small accident! you literally fractured your foot in a car accident and you have 3 stitches on your arm! you can't walk that's for damn sure, what, are you just going to not let any of our friends visit you for i don't know a few months? and not come to dinner and not expect anyone to ask about you? you know i can't lie for shit.”
“just… just tell them I left the country for a bit. for travelling or something I dont know just make something believable up. Just don't call him, I don't want him to see me like this. god, I look and sound like a loser. I don't want seungcheol to-”
the door to your ward swang open so hard a loud thud rang from the wall. “don't want me to what?” seungcheol asked as he panted; trying to catch his breath. your eyes widen at the sound of his voice, “cheol…what…” it seems for a minute, your brain had shut down., nothing was coming out of your mouth. “h-hyung,” seungkwan who was as shocked as you are, stuttered. “what are you doing here?” seungkwan had voiced his question for you. “y/n's hurt. you're hurt.” seungcheol answers as he looks back at you. seungkwan watched your face, clearly still shocked and struggling, “y/n is fine, she's just-”
“she doesn't look fine with a fucking needle up her arm. why didn't you call me?” you couldn't tell if seungcheol's question was for you or for seungkwan but you decided to speak anyway, “cheol-ah I'm fine, i-i just fell down the stairs.” what a stupid fucking excuse seungkwan thought to himself. what happened to making up something believable??? seungkwan tried to hide his face of unamusement. “you fell down the stairs?” this time seungcheol fixed his squinted eyes on you scrutinisingly. his right eyebrow raised in disbelief and he started walking closer to your hospital bed. while you tried to hide your casted foot out of sight as much as possible. “yeah I just, I tripped over my foot and fell down the stairs, just had a few cuts here and there and some stitches. no biggie.” you tried to sound as lighthearted and careful as much as you could while trying your best to hide the pain from having to move your foot out of sight.
“don't move, god, the hospital called and said you've gotten into a car accident, you still have me as your emergency contact.” oh. oh. well fuck. seungkwan sensed the already existing tension rising rapidly and decided it's best to go, “okaaay I should probably go and let you have some rest-” seungkwan almost feels invisible in the way seungcheol keeps disregarding his words and interrupting him, “why'd you not tell me? is this fun to you? the same way you fell out of love with me and just didn't tell me until I asked? why do I always have to find out things in the worst way possible?” seungcheol knows he's being harsh but he doesnt mean to, he's just so angry and hurt. so much anger in him towards himself for not being better for you. how bad must he have been, how much was he lacking for you to fall out of love with him? is it work? but he did try to make time for you, bringing you out for dates but you would reject those dates, movie dates at home were also always getting cut short, you no longer wanted to fall asleep on him shoulder or lap, you just went your way to the bedroom after announcing you're tired even before the halfway mark of the movie. was he doing something wrong? there's so much he still hasn't gotten the chance to ask you before you walked out on him.
and now seungkwan, seungkwan was a lot of things but patience? that man has very limited patience and he definitely doesn't have patience for the way seungcheol is speaking to you now. he has had enough of you running away from seungcheol when you still clearly have feelings for him. “hyung,” seungkwan reached for seungcheol's wrist, trying to get his attention. “come with me.” he started tugging and pulling at seungcheol's arm, dragging him out the ward. “she got into a car accident because she was having an anxiety attack because our song was playing on the car radio…your voice.. anyway…she's still in love with you.” seungkwan let out a deep breath he didnt know he was holding, he watches as seungcheol's eyes widen and dilate in shock, “im not trying to butt in your relationship with her or take her side but…just go easy on her. she's- just talk to her, give her some time, she'll open up to you again. you know what she's like when she wants to be stubborn. I'm going to get going, tell her bye for me.”
for the next 5 minutes, seungcheol stood by the door with his back slumped against the wall, replaying the words seungkwan had said to him. you still love him? you're still in love with him? how? but didn't you… didn't you tell him you don't anymore? if you still love him, why did you say that? he gently opened the door to your ward this time, making his way to you. he pulled the vacant chair closer to your bed before taking a seat, “cheol-ah, you don't have to stay here, i was just about to get some sleep anyway, im good on my own. I know you're busy-” “do you still love me?” the room turned so silent you swear you could hear if a pin were to drop on the floor. when you said nothing, he continued, “I have so many questions but i-i just need to know if you still love me... do you know how much I missed you?” tears you were so badly trying to hold back only cascaded down your cheeks, betraying you. both his hands come up to cup your delicate face inbetween his hands, both his thumbs working to wipe your tears away, “don't cry, pretty. you're breaking my heart.” his own voice cracks and his own tears starts showing themself around his brown orbs but you watch as he blinks them away. “tell me you love me." he whispered so quietly, your head now facing down, eyes closed as you start sobbing. “i can't cheol…if I tell you, if I tell you I love you I don't think I can let you go again.” the room fills itself with the sound of your sniffing and crying.
“you don't have to let me go, just tell me you love me and I won't let go of you, not again.” he placed a gentle kiss at the top of your head, bringing your face to his chest as he hugs you silently. “but cheol,” seungcheol doesn't think he can take it anymore if he hears you call him cheol one more time, he's growing putty and puttier in your presence. “yes, sweetheart?” he asked as he started stroking your hair. “im nobody and you're…you. we’re so different and we’re of two different worlds. you're doing so good in life and you're so handsome and im just…” his heart only breaks further at your words, “you're beautiful. you're the most beautiful person my eyes has ever laid on. you have always been beautiful to me and you still are. & we’re not that different, my love, even if we are, isn't that what we both love about us? so different yet so similar. you have qualities I lack and we compliment each other so well, no?” seungcheol pulled away slightly only to look into the eyes he had missed so much. “if there's somewhere or something im lacking at, tell me so I can be better for you.” he assured you again. “you're not lacking at anything at all cheol.” seungcheol notes how this is the loudest and clearest you've spoken since he's gotten here and he doesn't miss a beat when he says “you're not lacking either, you're doing so good my love. I wouldn't change anything about you, you know that? I love you just as you are, everything about you, I love you at your best and I love you just the same at your worst times. you just need to let me in when you have bad thoughts, let me love and reassure you hm? can you do that for me?” he asked as he patted at your head gently again. you had merely nodded lightly & said “im sorry cheol.” with more tears running down your cheeks before he spoke again, “it's not your fault, princess. I'm sorry I didn't notice it back then, it's my fault. I'm sorry.” a light peck of a chaste kiss placed on your cheek as you shook your head in disagreement, “it’s not your fault cheol.” cheol cheol cheol he couldn't take it anymore; bringing your face closer to his, he looks into your eyes again, asking for permission, at the small nod of your head, you fluttered your eyes close and he wasted no time in bringing his lips to yours gently, afraid of hurting you. his heart overwhelms in love for you, lips and tongue exploring each other in lost familiarity, oh how much you both missed each other.
“you still haven't answered me, princess.” another kiss to your forehead this time, “do you still love me?” his eyes searched yours again, looking for a hint of anything. you caught him by surprise when you pulled him in for another kiss, “I still love you. I love you, cheol, so much."
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superluver · 1 year
Text
Together again | Gojo Satoru
wc: 1282
warnings: MAJOR SPOILER WARNING, SPOILERS FOR SHIBUYA INCIDENT ARC AND MANGA, Chapter 236, mentions of pregnancy(literally one word), FEM!Reader, Wife reader — NOT PROOFREAD
(I didnt put an exact warning because it would literallt give away what happened)
Pairing: Husband!GojoxWife!Reader
desc: You meet with Gojo after two long months
He doesn't remember much, just a blink and he was back as his high school self. A female, hand on her hip, a curious expression written all over her face. Staring at him, she tilted her head. “Satoru? What are you doing here?”
Satoru Gojo wants to laugh, like this was all some cruel joke.
Here you were, in front of him after not having seen your face(though younger) in almost 2 months since the incident in Shibuya— where you died.
He partially blamed himself. He watched you during your last moments, and selfishly, he’s grateful he didn’t actually see your death. His wife, his one and only. He smiles, and laughes as he pulls you in by your waist into a hug. “My boy did so good,” you whisper, allowing him to dig his head further into your torso as you giggle, your own fingers curling in his hair.
You smell exactly the same, like home. A home he never got to give you.
After he’s done being whiny, and well, a child, he pouts, throwing his head back.
“Aw man this is awful!” He shouts, and you laugh. The person he doesn't realize sitting beside him speaks up.
Suguru. His best friend, the one he had to kill, the one that would keep him up at night. The one that—
“Guess you were wrong.” you giggle, and Suguru stares at the two of you like you were keeping a secret joke from him.
You point at him mischievously, “He was all like, when you die you die alone, to his students, but look at the reality of it— well not really reality but still!”
He whines, “(Y/N)!!!”
Suguru breaks the ice, “How was the king of curses?”
Satoru huffs, shaking his head with a half hearted grin. He nods his head so the side, the empty seat beside him— which you take, his hand taking yours while you sit
It’s cold, just like his.
The tip of his nose hits the back of your palm, his eyes are closed before opening halflidded, staring out into the floor. His eyes peer over the overly tinted glasses, responding, “That guy was too damn strong, and he wasn’t even trying.”
It was almost mumbled, like a child complaining. Still holding your hand, he looks at Suguru, “To be completely honest, I don’t think I would even be able win.. regardless if he had Megumi’s cursed technique or not. The guy had too much up his sleeve.”
Your free hand pats his arm, laughing loudly you shake him lightly with a coo, “It’s alright, you’re my loser anyways baby,” you say with pressed eyebrows and puckered lips, almost teasingly.
He rolls his eyes, biting your hand lightly.
“I gave everything I had. Just a little sad you guys weren't there to support me, maybe you would’ve been able to give me a slap on the back to motivate me,” He jokes, shaking his head with closed eyes, imagining Suguru and yourself in the crowd of students.
“I’m glad that he was the one to kill me.” He confessed.
Somebody stronger than me. He wanted to say.
“It’s kind of gross hearing that from you, Gojo. You sound like a samurai general.”
You’re laugher bubbles up from your throat, tears forming as you turn back feom your seat.
“Kento, you’ll never change, will you?” You laugh, watching Satoru smack Nanami on the head multiple times, ruffling his hair in the process. You get up, releasing Satoru’s hand to sit in the seat besides Nanami. Smiling as the seat behind you is now empty.
Shoko.
It was for her, she was the last of the group, and you hope she wouldn't be here for a while.
“I won’t justify him, but I’ll sympathize with you.. I guess..” he mumbles, causing you to slap him on the shoulder with no ill intent, laughter from his stoicness.
“Hey!” Satoru snaps back, and you reach over and pinch his cheek.
“What I’m trying to say is, it was a fitting way to go out, Gojo.”
“You should be morw polite to your Juniors.” You chastise Satoru.
“I was already nice enough to you!” He retorts, and you tilt your head with a smile. His hand takes yours that was clipped to his cheek back in his,
“What was it like for you guys in your last moments?”
You blink, looking around the room.
“It was kind of scary,” you start, and he clenches your hand slightly. He remembers how the two of you split, you pecked him on the cheek with a determined expression, clenching your fist you told him you would be back, before warping to Harajuku. It was the last time he woult see you conscious.
You had crossed paths with Mahito, and you had it under control, until you didn't. Your weak nature, strong virtue, Satoru told you these would get in the way of you becoming a sorcerer, but you would always brush him off, telling him, I’m fine.
But you couldn’t help it, seeing a small girl in the line of Mahito’s path of destruction. Your arm was the price to pay for her life.
And, maybe you had lost too much blood, you cant remember, it’s a blur, but Satoru remembers.
Your leg contorted in a way he coulf only asume was unfoxable, your arm missing, eye streaming blood, you were dead. But his six eyes said you were alive, that you both were. And he was hopeless, tued up by the prisom realm, watching your eyes dim, he watched you die.
“To be honest, I wanted to quit with Kento, but I just couldn't bring myself to leave you alone doing all this. I don’t regret it to the end,” you smile loving at him, and he feels like vomiting.
“I would do this a thousand times over if I got to be with you every time.” You tell him sweetly, and Nanami coughs, “Enough with the sappy shit.” He grumbles.
You laugh again, and stare at Suguru. He looks back at you, and you feel your lips curling back up into a brighter smile. The man who defected, the man who left you all, he was here, and with you all.
“Once,” all attention back to Nanami. “When I was discussing with Mei-san about where I should move, she told me to move North to become someone new, and to move south to stay the person you are. Naturally, I chose South. I think it’s ironic how I died while betting on my future. But it wasn’t too bad because of Haibara.”
Haibara grins, “Aw! You’re too kind!”
“I see..” Satoru says, and you squeeze his hand back. His head snaps upward, looking right in front of him to Yaga, his voice as annoying as ever, “Yo Yaga! I thought you said no sorcerer dies without regrets!”
You laugh, and he laughs back, the room filled with laughter, Riko, Kuroi, Kento and Yu, Suguru, even Yaga.
“Now I’m hoping this isn’t a dream.” He confesses, while standing up, and you smile.
“It’s not, ya big loser!”
You shout, standing up from your chair and throwing yourself over it, crushing him. He falls back onto the ground, and Suguru jumps on top of you, Yu crushing him as Satoru wheezes, and you see him smirk.
“Welcome back!” You grin, Suguru’s face smushed next to your own. Haibara’s chin resting in between the two of yours.
He takes in the scene in front of him, everybody he’s loved all together, and finally, his arms wrap around the three of you, and he’s just so happy, that he doesn’t even Think about going back.
CLEAR MINDSET THIS IS MY REALITY NO ONE TELLS ME OTHERWISE SHUSH
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stevie-petey · 21 days
Note
blurb idea? stug isn't having sex yet obviously but maybe dustin walks into bug's room while they're lying really close on her bed reading together and he flips his shit like OH MY EYES and they're like ...boy we're literally just sitting here. and steve's over for dinner and dustin refuses to look at him and claudia's like ok what's up and you're like literally nothing he's so dumb
i love dramatic dustin with stug so YES !!
enjoy <3
"so jo just rejects laurie? like, flat out, brutally rejects his marriage proposal after years of being best friends and basically already in love?"
"i mean, there are some nuances youre missing, but yeah. basically."
"what kind of sick book is this?" steve shoves the book away from him in disdain. his nose is scrunched up, offended, and you refrain from kissing it all better.
you fix a piece of hair thats fallen in his face as he lays next to you on your bed. "jo and laurie are tragic, i'll admit." your words are rough from reading for hours. steve always insists that you read the books for him, he claims youre better at it, but you know its because he loves the sound of your voice. "but its what makes the book so wonderful, dont you think?"
steve rolls his eyes at you. "your obsession with tragic romances concerns me. what, are you going to reject my proposal next? make me beg on my hands and knees for you?"
"technically you already did beg on your hands and knees for me-"
"wait, you didnt say youd accept my proposal."
with a sly laugh you clear your throat and bring the book back up to your face, continuing to read. steve stares at you as you read the heartbreaking words aloud, his eyes travel the length of your neck and the slope of your nose. the scene youre reading breaks his heart more than hed care to admit. youve been reading little women to steve for a few weeks now. he really thought itd be jo and laurie in the end.
lost in the way you voice lilts between jos soft rejection and lauries broken pleads, neither you nor steve hear dustin calling for you until its too late.
the boy barges into your room and nearly shrieks his head off when he realizes steve is in bed with you. "my eyes!" he cowers to close the door, covering his face with his grubby little hands.
"dustin!" you shout at him, throwing a pillow at him to shut up him. hes being dramatic, you and steve werent even doing anything. your boyfriend is lying next to you while you read him a long and horrendous breakup scene from a classic book. if anything, the two of you should be doing literally anything else.
steve rolls off your bed and lands on his feet in one fluid motion before running over to your brother. grabbing dustins shoulders, he shakes him to try and stop the screaming. "hey! alright, can you quit it?"
"no! you were-you-my eyes!" dustin scrubs at his face with utter turmoil. he hadnt even known that steve was in his house. normally the asshole makes his presence known, stops by dustins room to say hi. its why he barged in in the first place.
had dustin known hed walk into steve in your bed, he wouldve brought a goddamn flame thrower with him instead.
"we were reading, you moron!" youre next to steve now, desperately trying to quiet your brother before your mom asks whats going on. hes already bad enough, but if your mother finds out steve had been in your bed as well, thered be permanent hearing loss.
"read at your desk! thats what those damn things are built for!"
steve shoves his hand through his hair, agitated. "oh, and who are you? the desk police?"
"'desk police'?" you stare at the teen, disappointed. "thats the best you could come up with?"
"im under a lot of pressure right now. cut me some slack."
"i want you dead."
both you and steve turn to dustin, shocked and disturbed by his words.
"okay, thank you for sharing your feelings, dustin." awkwardly you pat his shoulder. at least hes being honest and open with you. "not necessarily what i wanted to hear, but im proud of you for sharing-"
"he wants me dead and youre commending him?"
"not now," jamming an elbow into steves side, you shut him up and focus on your brother again. "now, is there a reason you barged in or can we go back to reading?"
dustins grimace on his face seems permanent now. his nose is slightly upturned, his eyes distrusting. narrowing them at you, he takes slow, calculated steps back out of your room. "dinner is ready," he says tersely before leaving entirely.
"well, this will be fun." steve sighs, and you nod grimly.
dinner is not fun.
dustin doesnt look steve in the eye the entire time. he sits as far away as possible from the teen. when asked to pass the bread, dustin pointedly ignores steves request and throws a roll to you. the bread nearly knocks your mothers water over and shes finally had enough.
"goodness, dusty! what has gotten into you tonight?" she exclaims, settling the glass that threatens to spill.
mouth full of mashed potatoes, his eyes light up evilly. before he can even think about opening his obnoxious mouth, you kick him underneath the table. your foot connects with his shin and dustin wheezes mashed potatoes all over his meal.
"dusty!" your mother gasps, alarmed. she looks at you in concern while steve snorts into his glass of water. "what is going on with you three?"
"nothing, mom." grabbing the bread that was thrown at you, you pick it apart with your fingers and make a delighted sound. "dinner is lovely tonight, by the way."
"i love what youve done with the mashed potatoes, mrs. henderson." steve is quick to add, jumping in. he makes a whole show of scooping up the mashed food and shoving it into his mouth, moaning in pleasure. "is there garlic in this?"
your mother, always easily distracted, claps her hands with joy. "why, yes! i wanted to try something different. do you really like it?"
"i adore it."
later that night you find yurtle the turtles mealworms underneath your pillow.
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starlightazriel · 25 days
Text
bee 9
series desc: modern best friends > lovers (fem reader) tattoo artist az
warnings: 18+, az acting crazy and toxic haha, arguing/angst, just the beginning of the groveling, simp behavior hahaha, drug/alcohol addiction, reader struggling, heart break, time jumps, aa, depression mess, az is literally falling apart at the seams, don't expect good decisions from reader lol she's hurting that's all ima say
a/n: wow I know I ain't shit this took me so long I'm sorry angst central too ik
wc: 3.8k
other parts can be found on my az masterlist <3
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nine
"Say the word Bee, I'll knock on his door and knock him out." His jaw was tight, eyes dark with the desire to inflict pain. Real pain, sometimes that side of Azriel scared me, these days it would only make my panties wet.
"Im fine Az," I wiped tears from my face with the back of my sleeve, my chest tightened slightly at his willingness to put himself at risk for my naivety. "Hes not worth it anyway," I added, trying desperately to swallow the lump in my throat.
"Well that youre right about. Tried to tell you he didnt deserve you," he pauses, his face looking displeased. There's a moment of silence and it made me wish I had the courage to fill it with my feelings for him. "Please stop looking so sad though. Bings will help," he smirks, trying the only way he knew how to lighten the mood, he held up his bong, already freshly packed. I sighed softly, letting a small smile tug at the corner of my lips despite the ache I felt in my chest.
"Yeah they might," I smirk a little bit, and take the bong from him, taking one of my little baby hits, I shove the bong back in his direction, coughing obnoxiously despite the small hit. Normally he would make fun of me, I figured he was sparing me the embarrassment in light of the current situation.
"I can kick his ass," he repeats and I just shake my head at him. I didn't doubt it either— when it came to me, Az didn't have any limits. He would go down swinging for me, no matter who it was.
Thinking back on that memory... It made me feel sick, that now he was the one to hurt me.
I had made the mistake of trusting Azriel too much. I knew better. I knew he wasn't ready for this and still I let myself live in some little fantasy world for weeks. And now... Now I was dealing with the consequences.
My heart was shattered.
Incomparable to my insignificant couple of break ups in the past... This was so much worse.
Az... My Az. Maybe not my Az after all.
He clearly couldn't even handle a relationship.
Or maybe... The alternative made my stomach sink.
Maybe he knew the entire time that he was moving and he was just passing the time until he did? Az wouldn't do that... Would he?
You can know someone forever... As soon as there are drugs involved... Well, nothing is guaranteed.
It seemed to be just as hard for me to admit that he had a problem than it was for him. I hated it, but this pain— it made me see things more clearly, see him more clearly.
I couldn't bring myself to block him. I did have to turn my phone off for a while because not picking up was just becoming hard. 39 missed face time calls, 12 missed regular calls, and a handful of text messages that I was leaving on read.
baby please just talk to me
i'm so sorry shit was so fucking stupid
please come home
bee i swear i'll come over there and drag you out of that house by your hair
you know i didnt mean that
im sorry
i need you bee, don't shut me out
just talk to me
i'll stop drinking so much i'll do whatever please just fucking talk to me
cass is a fucking idiot nothing happened i swear baby i didn't fuck anyone.
The messages were spaced out minutes between some, hours between others. I couldn't help myself when I typed out a reply to the last one.
how do you know you didn't fuck anyone? do you even remember? You were getting your fucking grind on with a random ass bottle girl. or maybe she wasn't random lol who fucking knows with you. and you had your face in tits Az. Tits. WERE TOUCHING YOUR CHEEKS. AND YOU WERE SMILING LIKE YOU LOVED EVERY FUCKING SECOND. AND I BET YOU DID CUS YOU LOOKED HIGH OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND.
It was only seconds before he read it and was typing.
i didn't fuck anyone. i only want you. i'm just a dumbass. bro please do not do this shit to me. i will do ANYTHING to make this up to you that's on literally everything.
And another one.
you don't have a choice anyway and i swear if i catch you outside with any of these mother fuckers yo youre both done
And another.
its not a threat its a warning don't play with me
I groaned in frustration and tossed my phone to the side. It was all so... Exhausting. My chest quite literally hurt. And the audacity, please don't do this to him?
He did this to us.
And why the fuck did he think he owned me? I hated that it made my heart flutter— bottle girls, titties, Vegas. I reminded myself.
Sick.
I had confessed everything to my mom the first day I had came back to my parents house, which in hindsight I wished I hadn't. Knowing me... I would be back in Azriels bed within days of being back, my cheeks burned at the thought. No matter what he did, it didn't change the way I now knew how he could make me feel.
She had always loved Az, since day one... He had practically been a part of our family at one point, joining our family dinners every night, even my dad and him had a certain respect for each other. 'Some people are just better off as friends,' was my mom's response to the whole ordeal. Maybe she was right, but I didn't like it, not now.
How could we go back to that?
Was it possible to go back to that?
-
The stress, the heaviness of my heart... I couldn't stop myself from swiping a cig from my dad's secret stash in the garage. I was now sat on the rocking chair on my parent's front porch, debating on what I was going to do when I returned home. I had to go soon, it had already been weeks now I was starting to dip into my old wardrobe.
I had been commuting to class even though it was much farther than Azriel's apartment. I just didn't know what to say when I saw him. I didn't even know how to bring up the fact that I knew he was moving. Did he plan on telling me? What had been his plan for my living situation if he didnt have the apartment anymore? Had he even thought about it?
"So you're smoking now?" his voice causes me to jump, my heart nearly leaping from my chest as my head snaps to Azriel who's standing there, one hand shoved in his pocket other hand gripping a small bouquet of flowers. Scarred fingers against delicate stems, my cheeks turned pink remembering what he had done to me with those fingers. That feeling soon turned to anger remembering what he else he had done, he's frozen now, maybe half way up the stone path leading to my parents front door.
"Jesus Az what the fuck?" I breathed out, exhaling a shaky breath, my tone laced with a venom I had never used with him before. "You scared the fuck out of me, what are you even doing here?"
"You know what I'm doing here," his voice is soft but slightly strained, my stomach twists at the pain I can feel, radiating off of him. I didnt know how he did that, he was always able to change the air around me— like I was so hyper aware of him that I could sense his feelings.
"Az-"
"I love you," he cuts me off, my breath hitches, his cheeks are slightly pink, hand still shoved into his pocket. I set the burning cigarette down on the can beside me, I tried to swallow the lump forming in my throat.
So long.
I had waited to hear those words for so fucking long. And now, here, under these circumstances— it didnt feel how I imagined it would. It didnt feel how it was supposed to.
"I love you too Azriel you know I do but I-"
"But what? You dont want me because Im so fucked up right?" His voice drops slightly, his throat bobbing and I noticed his grip tighten on the bouquet in his hand. His face was soft— pained, and my heart cracked again, remembering that boy so many years ago bruised and bloody with that same heartbroken face of betrayal, and now I had done that to him. "Im sorry, Im so fucking sorry please—"
"I didn't say that," I mumbled, my heart felt like it was bleeding in my chest, like there would be nothing left once he walked away. He didn't dare to step closer. "I just- I need some time Az," I mumbled softly and he closed his eyes for a minute before tugging at his hair, huffing out a frustrated breath. He looked like he would get down on his knees for me, like he would beg me if I asked him to.
"I know what that means Bee," he huffs out another small breath, his face slowly contorting into that hard cold stare I knew him to hide behind. "Anyway," he breaths out, looking away from me. "I'm going to change your mind, we—" he struggles again before giving up, I could see his eyes were bloodshot as he got closer, dark circles prominently underlining them. "Here," he finally says, he shoves the bouquet in my hand, there was an envelope taped to the side of it with my name on it.
"I'm coming home soon Az," I mumble, though, I didn't even know if I was ready for the conversation the two of us would be having. "I told you we could talk then," I add and he sighs, stepping back off of the porch.
"I'll see you soon then," he muttered softly and just shrugged his shoulders, I could tell he wanted to run to me... He wanted to wrap me in his arms and kiss me. He wanted to strangle me also— I could see that too, that deep rooted need for control, to make me see things his way. I couldn't blame him— it stemmed from years of physical abuse, traumas I would never truly be able to understand.
"Go home Az. Goodnight, thank you, for the flowers," is the last thing I say before walking back inside shutting the door behind me, in his face. I didnt watch him walk away, that short conversation had been painful enough. I put the flowers in some water and tore open the mini envelope despite how angry I was with him.... Seeing him, made me crave him so much more.
'I could lose every single thing I have in this world but I can't lose you. I miss you. Please stop shutting me out. I can't take much more of this Bee.'
His handwriting was rushed— desperate messy scrawl, guilt twisted in my gut. I couldn't help it... I had nothing to feel guilty about and yet... Imagining him alone, needing me, missing me... Enough to buy flowers and scribble out a little note. More than I'd ever seen him do for any other woman.
I couldn't fall for it.
My chest tightened and tears welled up in my eyes. Why did he have to fuck everything up? It had been so perfect. Leave it to a fucking man to ruin everything.
-
Azriel swallowed the bile that rose in his throat as he stared blankly in front of him at all of the faces looking back at him. His palms were sweaty, ears hot with embarrassment and he couldn't stop tapping his foot. He had opted not to get up and stand at the front, feeling much more secure in his seat toward the back of the room.
"Hi, uh, my name is Azriel, I'm twenty five, and Im um— Im an alcoholic," it was the first time he'd ever said it out loud, it tasted horrible on his tongue. "I've um I've been addicted to drinking alcohol probably for about ten years- Got me into other- shit and I'm here today because I fell in love with my best friend and um- I don't want to lose her. Never tried to quit drinking before— never really believed I had a problem but— yeah, here I am," his voice had gotten quieter as he finished and he realized he was rambling. His cheeks burned, he hated all the eyes on him, hated that he was the center of attention. And he was craving a line, bad.
His introduction was followed by many 'Hi Azriels,' which only made him feel more uncomfortable. They tried to make him feel welcome, tried to relate to him— get him to open up. He thought he might explode but he listened though. He listened to each and every persons story that shared. And when it was over the leader gave him a small white chip, service, unity, recovery. A pledge to a new beginning, toward sobriety.
He sighed and shoved it into his pocket, he was sitting on the step now, to go coffee cup in his hand, black obviously. Isn't that what recovering alcoholics did? Drink black coffee and smoke cigarettes?
"Can I bum one?" a male voice asks and next thing he knows he's sitting down next to him, he was a bit older, maybe 40.
"Sure," he mutters and pulls a cigarette from the pack and extends it to him, he recognized him from inside the meeting.
"It's Max, if you didn't catch it in there."
"Azriel," he mumbles, looking straight ahead at the cars passing by. He didn't know how to feel. He didn't want to get sober. But he needed Bee. He couldn't lose her, after getting a taste? He couldn't handle not having her again. He swallowed the lump in his throat.
"You need a sponsor?" he asks, raising an eyebrow, Azriel shrugs, the new sobriety coin felt like it was burning a hole in his pocket. The anxiousness... The insatiable desire to rid himself of any of his uncomfortable feelings by doing a line and buying a bottle... How the hell was he supposed to stay sane?
"You going to be my sponsor?"
"First things first, don't wear a cocaine vile around your neck to an AA meeting."
-
I was quiet, careful when I slowly pushed open the door to Azriels apartment, my apartment too, I guess. Not for long.
It didn't feel like home anymore— the sickening feeling that twisted in my gut as I took a step inside. It was quiet, he wasn't home... Fucking filthy. There was pizza boxes and take out containers, ash everywhere, multiple ash trays made from various things, there were unfinished cigs and blunts everywhere that made it smell awfully of cigarettes and stale weed. Cocaine residue and half crushed pills were out on the coffee table like it was normal. I swallowed thickly, a soft breath leaving my lips I knew I shouldn't feel guilty, shouldn't feel bad that he obviously wasn't okay... But I did, I just left him. Never, never had I ever done that to Azriel. I was the one constant in his life, the one person who was always there. Ever since that day in front of my house all those years ago.
Titties, bottle girls, moving to Vegas. I reminded myself, my stomach turned again. So angry. Fucking idiot.
I entered the kitchen for a glass of water, needing something to calm that sick feeling. The bile that rose in my throat that felt like I was about to hurl everything I ate for the past three days. I thought better of it quickly, before I consumed anything from this rancid kitchen I would need to deep clean and disinfect.
Dirty dishes in the sink, the dishwasher hanging open half loaded still with clean dishes like he had just been taking them from there and hadn't bothered to put anything away, empty liquor bottles overflowing from the small recycling bin, more take out containers, a bong tipped over, the foul smelling water from it still dripping off of the counter, a small puddle of brownish water collected on the white tile.
What the fuck?
My room was the only room that didnt smell like bong water and cigarettes, but still, he had been in here. Maybe even slept in here. Papers covered the floor, not just papers but drawings. There were drawings of me everywhere. Just me, me naked, him and I together, kissing, fucking, our hands intertwined— there were even drawings of us when we were younger. A little messy, like he had been pressing down so hard— drawing with such emotion that he kept breaking his utensil of choice that day.
I let out a soft sob, my hand flying to cover my mouth.
Fuck.
Kat. I needed Kat.
I tried to swallow the growing lump in my throat again and pulled my phone out to check her location. Of course she was at the shop.
-
"Hey," the bells chime softly as I walk into the shop, there was no one in the waiting room besides Kat and she looked up from her phone, our eyes locking.
"Heyyy baby," she greets, flashing me a smile that soon turns into a frown, her eyebrows drawing together. "Are you good?"
"No," I loosed a shaky breath, advancing to the counter, I leaned against it like I had so many times, but my chest was fucking aching. It was so fucking infuriating that nothing felt the same, nowhere felt the same. I guessed this was what heart break really felt like, seeing the world in every color one day and then black and white the next. "Is he here?" I dropped my voice lower, playing with one of the knick knacks on the desk to distract myself.
"No, he left a while ago, didnt say where he was going," she's still frowning, the worried look still plastered on her face.
"The house Kat?" I paused, making a face. "It's fucking disgusting, I don't understand how hes living like that," my harsh words could have only been brought on by anger, she softens, her look turning more sympathetic which annoys me only, I ignore it.
"He hasn't been the best at work either— snapping on everyone, late every day and fucked up," she lets out a small sigh, "Rhys is fucking pissed," she pulls her lip between her teeth.
"Fuck Rhys, honestly," I mutter quietly, she raises an eyebrow in response but I only ignore it. Of course, none of this was his fault, but still Vegas. Why fucking Vegas? "It's my turn to get fucked up, anyway, that's why I'm here I bought a bottle to pregame, just needed my bitch and one of her miniskirts," my words are met with a grin.
"Babes you know I got you."
-
I hadn't been drunk in a while, so to say the least I was enjoying myself. The pounding of the music, talking to strangers, dancing with Kat. I had needed all of this.
To slip out of my mind for a few hours and just let go.
Kat was definitely enjoying herself now too, and was dancing with some tall sexy man she had just met. I was keeping to myself for the most part, on the edge of the dance floor, swaying my hips to the music as I surveyed the scene with a fuzzy mind.
My mouth popped open in slight surprise and when I felt curiosity instead of the desire to leave immediately, I knew I had drank too much. There was Eris, in all his jewelry and expensive clothes, looking poised and composed as always. Long pale ringed fingers wrapped around a glass of amber liquid. I hadn't seen him since the night we shared.
"You ghosted me princess."
"I had other things going on— and I didnt finish," I smile boredly, not meeting his gaze, it must have been the liquor making me so bold, he scoffs slightly his eyebrows raising in surprise.
"Let me buy you a drink then, to make up for it, must have been an off day for me," he inquires, I wouldn't give him the satisfaction that my body was basically broken with anyone except for Azriel, I would let him believe it was his fault. His ego could be taken down a peg, anyway.
"I have one already," I raise it up slightly, smirking as I swirl the liquid around in the cup.
"Not anymore," in a swift motion he takes the glass from my hand and dumps the drink in a near by plant, a fake plant. I squeaked, looking around to see if anyone else had witnessed it.
"What the fuck is wrong with you? It's fake and you just filled it with liquor and juice! Have you even heard of a fruit fly?" I demanded, swaying a bit on my feet, liquor buzzing through my veins. If anyone did that at my bar, I scoffed slightly at the thought staring him down judgmentally for his utter carelessness.
"It's fake, so the liquor won't kill it," he flashed me his insufferable sexy grin before adding "there's wins and losses to every decision we make," his eyes flashed and I stopped for a moment, weighing those words.
No, I can't get caught up in this. I had to figure out what was going on with Azriel and I. "And now you don't have a drink and I get to buy you one, so I win, Im not really concerned nor do I care about any of the losses. Besides, I only ever come here looking for you, so I don't care if they get fruit flies." That cocky smirk he wore, the way he carried himself... He did look good. That piercing gaze, the confidence that radiated off of him along with his expensive dizzying cologne.
I remembered what Az had said about him 'theres a lot of people that would kill him in this city' hearing his words echo in my head, knowing how much he hated that I'd been with Eris... I swallowed, my cheeks turning pink.
Az didnt care when he was fucked up, when he was smushing his face between those two bottle girls titties he didnt think about me at home— waiting for him.
So I wouldn't care now.
I didnt think about him, I didnt think about what it would do to him when I wrapped my fingers up into Eris expensive shirt and yanked his tall frame down to me.
"Wins and losses you say?" I whisper before pressing a kiss to his lips.
-
a/n: cliffhangerrr only time and comments will tell if yalll are mad about this drama HAHA sorry I had to drag the groveling out into multiple parts Az WILL be on his KNEES in the near future
taglist <3: @smalljasper289 @cynthiesjmxazrielslover @scorpioriesling @userxs-blog @lilah-asteria @abadfantasybook @judeduartewannbe @lindsayscottagebythesea @velarisdusk @serxndipity-ipity-blog @julesvanslutta @honk4emoboyz @bookishbishhh @dakotali @blessthepizzaman @scooobies
IF ANYONES TAG DIDNT WORK IM SO SORRY
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8lyme · 1 month
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Why do I have to lose you?
Logan Howlett x reader (gender unspecified)
Part 2
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SUMMARY: You and Logan are being chased down by the military after a group of mutants attempted to set fire to the White House. The school instantly became a target. While trying to protect the school in a damaged X-jet, Logan decides your fate for you.
WARNINGS: Sad and a little graphic.
a/n: I am fr gonna do a pt 2 i just didnt want to make this super long like it will probably end up being also again pls give me a break i just gotta free this shit from the straight jacket it's in inside my brain
Within seconds of news footage airing, the whirring of chopper blades surrounded the school.
Since jet takeoff, Storm and Jean had jumped out to help on the ground. Both diverted most of the attacks away from the jet. You and Logan had flown over the masses of machinery that were crawling toward the school. Tanks and trucks filled with armoured soldiers and explosives gathered just outside the tree line. The explosives packed under the jet had long-since run out, hardly making a dent in the wall of troops.
The sensors in the X-jet are whirring, alarms flashing red and blaring. Almost as loud as tornado sirens. You're gripping at the controls, straining at keeping the jet level while a thruster sputters out. A lurch knocks the cabin as another sensor drums on. You pull on a lever to the side of the console in front of you as a hasty attempt to divert power back to the fizzling thruster.
"I think the jet took a hit," Logan calls out loudly over the screech of the alarms.
"No fucking shit!" You call back shakily, head pounding and heart hammering. The windshield is fogged from smoke damage and beginning to crack on the left side.
"You need to fly out of here!" Logan calls again, his voice near monotone.
"Again, no fucking shit!" You whip around to face him and use the opportunity to flip off the interior electricity. The cabin is only illuminated by the windshield, but you can't see Logan.
"We need to land" you say to the shadows of the bay. You glance around, still white-knuckling the controls before calling out "Logan?"
"Let me out" he responds, walking out from the base of the hangar. "Drop the hangar and let me jump out. I can get past the front line and set off the explosives in the trucks"
"Are you stupid? You'll plaster to the ground on impact" you tell him, turning back to the windshield in time to pull away from a stray rocket.
He comes behind you and grips onto your shoulder, forcing you to look his way again.
"Open the hanger and let me jump out" He says firmly. "And then get the hell out of here."
"I don't think you understand how physics works, Logan! I can't bring this jet more than fifteen hundred feet above the ground. You will literally splatter to the ground if you jump from that high."
His grip on your shoulder tightens, saying "I'll survive."
You pull away from him to face the console. "Have you survived a fall from this high before?" You ask over the roar of the thrusters.
"Will you listen to me?" He yells to you, taking your face in his hands. "You need to get out of here. I'll regenerate, you won't! My bones are indestructible -" And you cut him off.
"Your tendons aren't adamantium!" You yell to him, smacking his chest with the side of your hand for emphasis. "Your muscles aren't adamantium and your organs aren't adamantium! The second you jump out of this jet you will get shot out of the sky. How do you know you'll survive getting literally blown up?"
You try not to cry, sucking in a breath in an attempt to stop the stinging behind your eyes. His face is firm. He pulls the straps of your harness so you face him fully.
"You won't survive if this jet gets shot out of the fucking sky!" Logan shouts. "Open the hangar and get the hell out of here!"
"There is no reason for you to jump out of this jet, you self-sacrificial piece of shit!" You're trying to yell firmly, but your breath is shaky and your vision starts to blur. Suddenly, the spring of the chair unlocks and Logan clicks on the jet's autopilot and pushes your chair away from the console, locking it feet away from the controls.
"Logan!" You go to unlock the clasps of your harness as he pulls away from you. He must've crushed the buckles while you were fighting, because you can't unclasp yourself. Panicking, you whip around to try and face him while yanking at the harness as hard as you can.
He's walking toward the hangar while the door loudly begins to unlatch.
"Stop it!" you beg. "I am not going to scour these woods for your metal bones to put you back together and hope that you regenerate!" You begin to sob, pulling at your straps fruitlessly.
He marches back toward you, shouting "And I am not going to watch your empty casket go into the ground!" over the wind. You can see the hurt and panic on his face. He looks furious, but you know how terrified he feels. "I am not going to lose you."
The hangar is wide open now. Crackles of explosions sound off in the background.
"Why do I have to lose you?"
The furrow in his brow softens a little. He moves closer to bend and cup your cheek with his hand. You grip tightly onto his uniform as he kisses you, hoping in vain that you're strong enough to stop him.
Logan pulls away to the sound of the hangar beginning to close. He pries your fingers off him, turns away, and jogs to the lip of the closing door. You watch him leap out as the groan of the door comes to a stop.
Part 2 will be linked here!
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tim-shii · 7 months
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a blessing in disguise.
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a/n: dad!sae and husband!sae in one post? more likely than you think. timmy being down bad for sae for the nth time, what's new? i didnt know where this story was heading while i was writing it halfway but the idea is dad!sae and husband!sae. also this is cute i love this work i will cry over this for months.
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“sometimes, i’m pretty sure you’re only with me out of pity. how dare you? my love for you is sincere–”
“what are you babbling about now?” sae let out an exasperated sigh. you two are lounging in the living room. him, watching a soccer game of the rivaling team they’re going up against next week, and you, laying down on the couch with your feet on his lap, just blankly staring at the ceiling.
“…like i would even lay down in front of a moving train for you. or! i would, without a doubt, drink a poison that’s specifically for you. if you ever get in a coma, i would stab myself, juliet style, absolutely no hesitation. you don’t understand the lengths i would go through for you–”
“oh my god,” sae drags his palm down his face quite dramatically. “is this because i forgot to say ‘i love you’ this morning?”
“see? this is exactly my point. do you even like me?” you nudge his side with a sock clad foot.
he grabs a hold of your ankle and settled in back on his lap. “we’ve been married for five years. our son is literally five meters away playing with his sister.” sae replied with a pointed glare, visibly done with your antics. someone give him a break, he’s experiencing this exact predicament for the past seven years. he’s annoyed, yes, but it’s one of the reason he’s highly and deeply infatuated– in love with you.
you were about to retaliate but rushed footsteps and a sudden weight on your chest prevented you. “mommy!” speak of the little devil and he shall appear. kio, your 4-year-old son. behind him is kiho, your 1-year-old daughter, crawling as hard as she can trying to reach her older brother. immediately, you sat up on the sofa, pulling kio to your lap. “what– baby, are you crying? what’s going on?” you coo as you wipe the tears off his chubby cheeks.
“kiho bit me! we were just playing and then she suddenly–” while you were occupied with kio, sae abandoned his spot from the couch and opted to slide down to the floor instead. his eyes were focused on the adorable infant who is now crawling towards her beloved father. as soon as she’s only a foot away from him, sae scooped her up in his arms and retreated back to your side on the settee, “you bit your brother, kiho?” to which the infant just babbled incoherent with a wide grin.
sae smiles back at her before furrowing his brows. and it seems like you had the same thought as him when you looked at him with a confused frown.
“bit you?” you asked kio.
“yes, she did! it hurts! i think her bite left a mark!” he showed you his left forearm and there you see. the mark of a small baby tooth.
“she’s teething!” you exclaimed happily after kissing your son’s forearm. (“kisses make the pain go away.” you once told him when he tripped and scraped his knee at the park.) sae gently lift up kiho’s lips to peek at her gums, and ta-da! a cute tooth peeking back at him.
“she’s growing up too fast.” sae hummed, kissing kiho’s head, making her giggle.
“mommy, why did she bite me?” kio patted your cheek to get your attention back on him. “did i do something wrong? i thought she was having fun when we were playing together.” your heart felt stabbed, squeezed and stepped on ten times as kio looks at you with tears in his eyes.
“she was just showing affection, ki. she must’ve felt overjoyed with you but she didn’t know how to express it. she is a baby after all.”
“did i bite when i was a baby, too?”
“oh, absolutely. you bit your dad mostly.” you laughed at the memory of sae wincing in pain as his son decided to sink his growing teeth onto his father’s shoulder as he carried him.
“now. kiho, baby. say sorry to your brother.” sae held her in the middle of you two like a cat, his hands supporting his torso under her arms. however, instead of a garbled apology, kiho blew a raspberry to kio.
“hey, that wasn’t nice,” the little boy frowned.
“mom, don’t laugh– dad, stop laughing, too!” kiho followed the two of you and let out a gleeful squeal. all the while kio rubs the saliva off his face with your shirt.
“kio!” sae laughs even harder. kiho, too.
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likes and reblogs are appreciated! masterlist
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nhularin · 1 year
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you got me looking for attention
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PAIRING riki x reader GENRE highschool AU, best friends to lovers, she fell first but he fell harder type of dynamic, fluff WARNINGS none i think? not my best work LOLLL not proofread WC 0.6k ANNOUNCEMENT the nwjns series will be updated daily since i literally have nothing to do durinf summer break
❕series masterlist
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September 30, 1998
"i like you, riki"
your head was rested against his forearm, with the voice of your homeroom teacher muffled in the background. there they go again niki chuckled to himself, finding your words strangely amusing
in a seemingly endless loop, you poured out your heart, to niki time and time again. at his house, on your (platonic!) walks at night and now in class. each time, he responded with a laugh, a sparkle in his eyes, and a lighthearted remark that danced in the air. with each passing moment spent together, your infatuation for him grew, intensifying the butterflies that fluttered wildly in your stomach.
at first, you found comfort in his laughter, feeling proud of yourself for being the reason of his momentary happiness.
but as the confessions persisted, doubts began to sneak in. "am I bothering him?" you wondered , guilt and doubt creeping into you.
days turned into weeks, and you found yourself growing even more weary of pouring your heart out to someone who seemed uninterested. with a heavy heart, you resolved to stop with the confessions, fearing you were only annoying niki, a playful game that he enjoyed. you longed for a connection that went beyond friendship, but jeopardizing what you both had right now is far from what you wanted
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eyes wide you picked up what the hell does he want at 2 am? not that youre complaining of course, you would sacrifice your favorite snacks just to hear his voice.
"hello?"
"ah, yn" you heard him whisper from the other side, his voice deep and raspy "i didnt think you'd pick up"
"whats so important that you have to call me so late at night, mr ' i-am-an athlete-and-need-my-beauty-sleep' ?" you joked, knowing that the boy will scold you for keeping him up so late later at school
"shut up" a smiled etched on your face and light laughter tickled your ear "i know its not the best thing to do over call but its about your confessions" your heart raced. is this it? is he going to reject you like you've always dreaded?
"You know... all those times you confessed, I laughed it off not because I wasn't interested," he confessed, his voice laced with a mix of nervousness and sincerity "but because I couldn't believe someone like you could ever like me. i mean, you are you and i am me"
silence filled the air
"ah.... im sorry for calling, but i've been tossing and turning thinking about.. you. youre a real headache y'know"
your eyes widened, unable to process what niki said. your heart leaped with a mix of surprise, relief, and a newfound hope. this is it. this is it.
"youre such a jerk" you laugh playfully, the past doubt and insecurities washing away at his words "you got me looking for attention while leaving me question everything"
in that moment, nikis laughter transformed into something deeper, his confession reaching across the wall that had kept them apart.
and with a smile illuminating both of your faces, you bid your goodbyes, promising that you will talk at school the following morning and knowing that from that day forward, your laughter would ring with a newfound meaning.
two souls, once blind and in denial to each other's affections, now found comfort in the affection they shared.
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rafeshow · 2 months
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where a fan made an 10 minute video with a compilation of hasan and reader being in love.
just for clicks
hasanabi x fem!streamer!reader
tags : hasan being a bit of an ass, tension, lingering touches, angst, use of y/n (scary ik), this is a blurb (I can’t make more parts if ppl want it), basically just angst, nothing really from the readers pov
a/n : i’m pretty sure you were looking for a more sappy direction w this request, but i rlly couldn’t help myself and i made it angsty 😭. also this is my first fanfic on this acc so pls be nice to me 🙏 im not good w english
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It was a regular streaming day for Hasan, for the most part. His typical bogging on about politics, random internet drama, and his frequent frustration at chat. Behind all that though, his mind was a fog. You; another streamer, having been friends with Austin, being introduced to the Fear& group, and all but weaseling your way into being a staple member of the friend group, was all that Hasan could think about. Austin had tried to set the two of you up when you were first introduced to the friend group, but you never ended up going on any serious or planned romantic ventures, the two of yous schedules preventing from such.
That’s not to say you weren’t interested in eachother, it was quite the opposite actually. It was unspoken between the two of you, literally. Minus talking on the podcast or short interactions in videos, you had never spoken outside of ‘work’. That didnt stop the tension from growing though.
It started as accidental; Hasan gently grazing the back of your neck when walking behind your chair during filming in the cramped podcast room, his warm fingers barely lingering for a second on your bare neck, followed by rushed apology. Then it was you; lightly holding his waist as you attempted to squeeze behind him during a cooking stream, still unable to get past without his backside brushing against your front to a degree. And those two accidental touches wouldn’t have been a problem if they had just stayed those two accidental touches. The two of you managed to bump into eachother enough times that it had you each questioning if the other person was doing it on purpose.
Hasan was the first to break the ‘accidental’ rule, having grabbed your waist firmly and practically picking you up off the ground to move you on one occasion. You followed suit with the rule breaking, leaning across him to grab something from QT while filming the podcast and intentionally resting stretched for a moment; your top half shelved atop his forearm as it laid flat on the table.
The two of you refused to do anything about it though, and it was driving you both mad. Each touch was getting more daring then the last, and it was a game of who was going to break first. You were mad because you thought he was intentionally toying with you; knowing it drove you mad whilst not being interested himself. Just doing it to mess with you. Hasan on the other hand was just generally pissed you hadn’t done anything yet, which was ironic considering he didn’t have the gall to do anything himself either.
It was all that Hasan had been thinking of that day, and he questioned that if his facecam didn’t cut off at the top of his head that chat would be able to see the steam emanating from it. He was beyond frustrated, but he found it easy to play off; opting to take his anger out on the idiots who left comments on his livestream.
The two of you hadn’t thought about what your predicament looked like from an outsiders perspective though, not until now atleast.
Hasan was watching some political interview; mostly letting it play while opening links from chat in other tabs. As he opened one in particular, his heart stopped. He quickly clicked back to the tab, his brows taught together as he re-read the title.
“No fucking shot.” He forcibly laughed out, not only in disbelief himself but also trying to play his reaction down a bit for the stream. It was a compilation video, titled “y/n and hasan being down bad for 7 minutes”.
He was shocked he hadn’t thought about it, honestly. He was so concerned with keeping his feelings down while streaming by himself that he hadn’t even considered how he looked when he was actually with you. He clicked play without a second thought, his brain still registering the situation at hand. He had to stop himself from letting a grin slip out.
He watched the whole video without saying anything, which was alarming for chat and him. He was just entranced at how painfully obvious the two of you made it. The way he stared at you as you spoke to someone else. The way you never looked at him when he spoke to anybody. The way he stared at your hands as you fidgeted with a mic cord. The now obvious touches. He was baffled.
But his emotions quickly flipped back to his previous frustration. All that has been going on and you still hadn’t done anything? The two of you still hadn’t even talked? You had interacted this way long enough for somebody to make a 7 minute long compilation and the two of you still hadn’t done anything? He turned to chat, decided to take it out by being defensive.
“It’s actually hilarious the shit you idiots come up with. You do realize we’ve never talked right? The little shit we’ve said on camera is all we’ve ever said to eachother. Ever. I don’t even know her actual name. I don’t even have her in my contacts. I’ve never even thought about her in that way. You guys are so apt on shipping every male and female to ever interact together, it’s disgusting. You guys are fucking weird.” He took a beat, knowing the shit he was saying was doing anything but help his case, and knowing the hole he was digging for himself was just getting deeper. The few excuses he could come up with were borderline pathetic and certainly laughable. He just hoped he said his words fast enough that none of it stuck, even though he could practically feel the clips getting posted to twitter. In a last stitch effort to save himself, he blurted out;
“And anything she’s ever done around me is just for fucking clicks anyway.” He closed his mouth immediately after saying it. Hasan knew how much of a low blow that was, he knew how much he defended other streamers in the space for the same shit, and he couldn’t believe he’d just let that out about you of all people. He knew then in that moment that he’d lost all chances of anything with you, and he couldn’t grasp the fact that he was able to royally fuck himself over in a matter of seconds. He sat there silent, grumbling something else about chat being stupid, and then he went back to his political video.
He tried to keep a stone face, but he couldn’t help as his eyes caught chat every few minutes, mixes of shock and anger still bubbling between all of them. Hasan tried to redeem himself as much as he could; making some jokes and throwing some insults at whatever video he was watching. The main mass of the shocked comments eventually fizzled away, but he ultimately ended up wrapping up stream after another 30ish minutes. All he could do now was watch as everything unfolded before him.
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mythicmanuscripts · 1 month
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With how needy Aegon is I wonder what would happen if you would deny him (as a punishment or just a challenge), like no touching for a week or so. Could he do it or would he try and fail? Would he try to seduce you to make you give up? Or would he be so distressed about it that you stop early?
Good question anon!! Needy aegon is such a good concept and it works so well.
NSFW sub!aegon below the cut. It's a little angsty but I promise it ends well :))
I've definitely talked about this before but I'm gonna bring it up again: Aegon thrives on routine and rules with punishments for breaking the rules. He needs the punishments to forgive himself and to feel that he deserves the praise when he does follow the rules.
I definitely think orgasm denial can be a good punishment for him, not edging but literally just not letting him for a few days. You don't edge him or tease him or anything like that, you literally just don't touch him sexually.
However, the first time you attempt this punishment things do not go well. The original plan wasnt just no orgasms, it was no attention at all and that goes horrifically.
He can handle the no orgasms and no sexual touching, but when he wakes up the first day of the punishment and you turn your head when he tries to kiss you? The poor thing wants to cry. Then he tries to burrow into your arms and you respond by getting up and reminding him of his punishment for the next four days.
When you had discussed possible punishments, the no attention idea seemed to make a lot of sense. He knew he wouldn't like but he's not supposed to like punishments and he thought he'd be able to handle it. But he didnt consider that no attention actually meant no attention whatsoever and not only no sexual attention.
You're up and dressed and out of the room before Aegon even properly processes this. You leave quickly because you know you'll cave if he asks for hugs or kisses.
You only see Aegon that night at dinner and you immediately can see something is wrong. Usually, Aegon is almost always happy and giggly at dinner. Ever since you started always sleeping in the same bed, he'd be almost giddy during dinners because he knows that after that he can retire to his chambers with you.
But now... now aegon realises you probably won't even come into your chambers until you're about to go to bed. He's so sad just thinking about that. Normally after dinner you'll let him kneel or cuddle you and talk about his day. And he just... he knows he was bad and he broke a rule and he deserves punishment but he wants to talk about his day!!
You only need to take one look at him to see something is very wrong and you immediately tell the servants you and him will be eating later and then lead him out of the hall. Alicent looks like she's about to protest about the King leaving a dinner when there are guests present but the death glare you give her shuts her up.
Poor Aegon actually thinks he's somehow done even more wrong now, because he doesn't know why you'd stop the no attention rule.
When you get back to your chambers you immediately pull him into a hug and he collapses against you, clinging to you extra tight and mumbling apologies against your shoulder. When you tell him he's done nothing wrong, he just clings to you even tighter, terrified that you'll push him away.
Eventually you manage to coax the issues out of him, and your heart breaks when you realise just how much the no attention punishment hurt him. In hindsight, you should have seen this coming considering how needy he is. Aegon practically lives on praise and attention, so of course he's gonna crash without it. Especially because he already wasnt feeling good because he broke a rule.
You change the rule right then and there, telling him his punishment is over and that later you can discuss possibly having a punishment of just no sexual attention. He tries to shake his head and say he can handle it, but you stop him.
You cup his face wiping the tears away from his cheeks with your thumbs and then keep him there as you say, "I'm supposed to look after you, yeah? I choose how best to punish you and this isnt it. I can't let my sweet husband go without my love and care for any amount of time."
So needless to say, you and Aegon have dinner in bed that night and Aegon spends the entire night cuddled up in your arms.
From then on, the punishment is always just no sexual activity and you actually ensure to give Aegon even more attention than normal during the punishments because you know he must be feeling guilty.
So yeah, clingy subby aegon cannot go a full day without cuddles, which, fair enough.
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fluffyartbl0g · 1 year
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Redraw of the panels that SHATTERED MY HEART o(;△;)o!!! OG panels + Opinions on the Luffy separation arc under read more
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Okay let me just go on a tangent about my feelings about the post-series Luffy separation arc, cause I think it gets way too much hate when it’s such a heartbreaking and well executed deviation from oda’s standard formula!!! I know that we all love monkey d. luffy and he’s LITERALLY the main character of the series, but it was also really nice to get more time to focus on the rest of the crew. But here’s the thing, even when Luffy wasn’t here, he was still here. And I’m not talking about the so called ‘blessings’ or whatever that kept SUSPICIOUSLY popping up around the crew when Luffy disappeared, I’m talking about the consequences that arised from him disappearing. We truly got to see how grand the effect luffy has had on the world around him, and how many lives he was able to touch ; - ; So even though luffy physically wasn’t present (I mean KIND OF but you know what I mean), this was still VERY MUCH a luffy arc imo. 
Oh man but I think Oda wrote luffy’s disappearance so well,,, I was sobbing for like 80 percent of this arc. Like just gradually seeing the crew’s deterioration as time passes by,,, but everyone has such unwavering faith in their captain, he HAS to come back cause Luffy always comes back. But here’s the thing, Luffy didn’t know what was happening to him when he started disappearing. But what he DID know is that he wasn’t sure if he was gonna be able to come back or not. And Luffy hates breaking promises- he’d never make a promise if he didn’t plan to keep it, and he’s not an idiot either, so when he just felt himself disappearing and saw zoro nearby... Instead of saying something like “I’ll be back!” and potentially making his crewmates wait for him forever, he tells zoro to “take care of the crew”... SOBBING AND CRYING T - T. So YES. the crew has unwavering faith in their captain. But. Luffy didnt say that he’d be coming back or anything. So what are they supposed to do really.
And it’s really hard to read at some parts, like it never loses the goofy tone that has been there throughout all of one piece and it’s really sweet to see everyone rely on each other to keep one another afloat, but the slight tension that keeps building up over the months while they keep looking for clues and answers... And how each lead keeps becoming a dead end... When it builds up and Usopp finally voices the thing that’s on everyone’s mind.
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Oh man. I started crying so hard. It took 6 month for any one of them to say something. Like this is One piece. Of course Luffy is gonna come back eventually, it would be waay too dark otherwise... But Idk man, even I started to doubt that :((( But luckily. THIS IS ONE PIECE. So right after everyone started,,, well not exactly losing hope or anything (maybe a bit)? but going BATSHIT INSANE FROM THE REALITY THAT THEIR CAPTAIN MIGHT BE GONE FOR GOOD, they finally got a solid actual clue of what might’ve happened to luffy!!! And I’m SO GLADDDD!!!!
Omg and when they tracked down the pray-pray no mi user and finally got some answers out of him. OMG WAIT A MOMENT I REALLY LIKED IS WHEN PRIEST GUY IS LIKE “urerheg without luffy up there as a god the entire world may very well be destroyed cause the sun has been super unstable for centuries blah blah” and then Nami freaking PUMMELED THE GUY AND SHOVED HIM DOWN WITH HER STAFF AND
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SOBBING CRYING SOBBING. THEY WOULD POTENTIALLY BLOW UP THE ENTIRE WORLD IF IT MEANT THAT THEIR CAPTAIN WOULDNT HAVE TO BE LONELY ; - ; KILL ME.
URGH I was really hoping that Luffy would return right once they beat him up cause I really really missed my boy, but honestly I think the final method of getting Luffy to return was super clever and absolutely worth the extra 3 weeks of waiting!!! I know that it was foreshadowed across the whole West Blue Saga and everything but I honestly had no clue it would end like that, DONT MAKE FUN OF ME :(((
When the crew finally got their captain back after 8 months of waiting... I mean they’ve been separated before for even longer periods of time, but they always knew that they’d be back together. This time they didn’t know. BUT AREHAHRGE ALL THE PAIN AND SUFFERING WAS SO WORTHIT WHEN THEY ALL FINALLY REUNITED T - T!!!!!! UWAHHWHAHWUAAGGHA!!! AND SEEING ALL THEIR ALLIES AND FRIENDS THEYVE MADE JUST CHEER AND CRY WHEN THEY HEAR THE NEWS!!!! I WOULD CHUCK ALL THE PANELS HERE IF I COULD BUT ID JUS T REACH THE IMAGE LIMIT BECAUSE ALL OF THEM MADE ME CRY ; - ;!!! Literally just read those 5 chapters in the arc finale cause,,,, man so good T - T
Anyways TLDR: The post-series luffy seperation arc is NOT BAD and you guys are JUST COWARDS AND LIARS!!!!
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