#i dont know who i am
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Emily, I'm sorry. I just make it up as I go along.
#boygenius#julien baker#lucy dacus#phoebe bridgers#lyrics#lyric quotes#the record#emily im sorry#im 27 and#i dont know who i am#but i know what i want#this song is so personal to me#im sorry#forgive me#cant we just make it up as we go along?#deleted before cause the lyrics were wrong#dumb
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"Suddenly I wonder, 'Where is the girl that I was last year? Two years ago? What would she think of me now?"
- Sylvia Plath
#foryou#tumblrpost#quotes#source: tumblr#literature#life quotes#quoteoftheday#poems and poetry#poetry#sylvia plath#writers and poets#sad thoughts#sad quotes#im not okay#who am i#i dont know#i dont know who i am#who is she#thoughts#late night thoughts#dark academia#dark academia aesthetic#dark academia quotes#dark academia vibes
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what they don't tell you about growing up as an isolated little girl is you'll forever have a little girl screaming for love and affection inside you and she doesn't go away. you can use all sorts of unhealthy coping mechanisms and she won't go away. but you're too scared to ask for affection because you genuinely don't know how. you literally can't.
#this is so cringe << sharing emotions on my Sharing Emotions Account#i dont feel like myself right now#i dont know who i am
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feeling anxiously inclined to curl up into a ball for the next month 🎀
#core#female hysteria#identity crisis#manic pixie dream girl#tw self destruction#hell is a teenage girl#ana advice#i dont know who i am#idk man#relateable#3d relapse#tumblr problems#girlhood#anxitey#anxceit
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tw dissociation
again, she splits
fragmented and frozen
something takes over
strange words in a voice that isnt her own
not anymore
not anymore
again, she splits
a fraction of herself remains
so small, so weak
she can never be sure she exists
not anymore
not anymore
again, she splits
there is only silence
a week passes, a month
she isnt herself
not anymore
not anymore
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I think I am waiting for something
I am not sure for what
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Everything's gonna be okay, right?
Everything's gonna be okay, right?
Everything's gonna be okay, right?
Everything's gonna be okay, right?
Everything's gonna be okay, right?
Everything's gonna be okay, right?
Everything's gonna be okay, right?
Everything's gonna be okay, right?
Everything's gonna be okay, right?
Everything's gonna be okay, right?
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Therapists stop telling me to meditate. Stop telling me to see things through my "minds eye". Stop being weirdly spiritual during my sessions, I'm religiously traumatized. Stop telling me that there are different parts of myself. Stop saying my anger or disability is separate from me. I had a system and I have OSDD you're splitting me again. Stop it please I'm mentally ill enough you're actually driving me into psychosis. /srs
#Therapy#mental health#mental illness#meditation doesn't always help#Osdd#psychosis#i dont know who i am#who am i#where am i#Mental health awareness#some therapy doesnt work
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It's so hard because I never expected to live past 16 or 18 and yet I'm still here and don't know what to fucking do.
#mental illness#mcfatty#bpd#fat girl for life#borderline personality disorder#personality disorder#why am i even here#i dont know who i am
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i have listened to so many songs since the new year and i dont even know who im supposed to be anymore
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How do I know which of me is real
#whoops.having a philisophical breakdown dont mjnd me#this is nothing im just saying words thag sound good none of this means anything#i dont know who i am#i should go to bed
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i am so tears tonight. i hate being 20
#i am so lonely#everything is too much and also too litte#i want to start livng#when does that happen#how do i make it happen#i feel like everything i do is a waste#i can't do anything#i dont know who i am#i know im not what i want#i love everything and i hate everything and i want to go to the sea and the mountains and hug my mom and go somewhere no one knows my name#i want to fly#i want to be a mermaid#i want to love#i want to be loved#i want to scream and sing and laugh and cry and talk until my voice is sore#i want to be mute#i'm going to lose my minf#shut up tortle#(sorry feel free to ignore me i had too much wine)#tortle has a moment
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im too self aware i wanna be dumb and impulsive like everyone else
#dumb wh0re#self awareness#core#tumblr girls#ughhhh#niche#women#hollywood#ana advice#ur mom#personal#dear diary#cool girl#wierdcore#identity crisis#i dont know who i am
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Im learning to unmask and like that's great that's super but I'm also realizing just how fucked up and traumatized I am.ans I'm just
I knew it wasn't Good but talking about most of anything I can remember from my childhood is met with straight up grimaces and uncomfortable silence like
Yikes
#and im#like i know my parents are both super traumatized and super mentally ill too but fuck me .#and now im#trying to fucking figure out how to be a person when i dont fucking#i dont know who i am#im scared and im tired and i knew my brain was fucked and im having to try and deal with that while#dealing with worsening mental health#im not posting this for pity or anything i literally just#i need it not in my head#tbd#ignore me
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therapy quote that I wanted to remember:
me: idk I've always just kinda... changed for each person I talk to?
therapist: ha! no! don't. do that! <3 :)
#i like this one#i had a bad impression of therapy with my first therapist#but now?#10/10 reccomend#like holy fucking shit#i DONT know who i am#fuck#ive been just working to make others happy#instead of being myself#and doing things for me#holy shit#bumpyramble
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