#i got played like a fiddle

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

I just had a really weird experience with a dating app and I don't know what's real anymore.

I matched with a cute girl earlier today, and we spent a couple hours talking about our shared interests in podcasts and history and weird niche topics nobody else cares about. It was nice, and I asked her if she wanted to get lunch sometime this week. She said she'd like that, but then immediately changed the subject to talk about her job instead of scheduling the date. I mean, that's not TOO weird, I figure she must have wanted to say no but didn't want to hurt my feelings. Whatever. No big deal. We keep talking.

She mentioned that she works as a medical scribe at a doctor's office, and I said that that sounds like a wizard's apprentice. She said that medicine is the intersection between science and magic. I replied with a throwaway joke that chemistry is just alchemy with a little flair, and then shit went off the rails because she sent me a link to a pornhub video titled "We came at the same Time - Sensual Side Fuck" and said "me when someone tells me they're an alchemist."

A cute girl sends me a literal porn link after dodging the question of whether she wanted to go on a date, so I'm confused as hell. I don't know if this is her way of flirting or what, so I replied "I'd be down to practice some alchemy if you're not busy." I regretted saying it immediately because I never talk to anyone like that, I was just blind sided by the porn and thought maybe she would think it was funny. Well, after a few minutes she says "did you just ask to fuck me?"

Okay, I'm going down in flames, I crossed a line, that alchemy "joke" was inappropriate and creepy and she's clearly not into it and she's probably gonna unmatch me and block me and report me or something. I'm still confused over the direction the conversation is going, but I decide it'd be better if I apologize and go on the defensive instead of doubling down like a jackass. I tell her "no, not really," I'm not soliciting a stranger for sex, I was just yes-anding. She sent a porn link. What was I supposed to say? How was I supposed to respond?

Another few minutes pass. I was 100% sure that when I reopened the app she would be gone, but no, she finally replied "I was hoping you were..."

What kind of mind game is this? Is she just looking for a hookup? Her profile specifically says she's not! I have no idea what's going on.

"Did you just ask to fuck me?" My honest answer would have been "yes, isn't that what you wanted?" but the thought of saying that to somebody makes me feel like a douchebag. Her tone with that question didn't sound flirty, it sounded accusatory, like she was outraged I had the audacity to ask for sex so soon. My social anxiety is going through the roof. Whoops, turns out she actually WAS flirting and DID want to have sex, and I've managed to waffle it and sound like an asshole no matter what I say. Damned if I do, damned if I don't.

From my perspective:

Her: *posts meme about sex* (it's just a meme, nothing more. Don't read into it)

Me: *flirty memey response* (could go either way; I'm not outright saying I want to have sex with her, I'm just matching her energy. She memes about sex, I reply in kind because I thought it would be weirder go ignore it)

Her: oh my god, did you really just say that? Did you really think I wanted to have sex with you?

Me: I'm sorry, I overstepped

Her: mind games, dumbass! You don't know what I want, motherfucker!"

From her perspective:

Her: our conversation is going well, let me drop a big hint that I want to hook up

Me: picks up on the hint

Her: really?

Me: NO!

Her: oh... okay... nevermind...

So then I take a step back and try to see if there's any way whatsoever to salvage this dumpster fire of a conversation. I admit that I'm confused and ask her point blank if she wanted to have sex. I legitimately don't know if she was making a move or not, and I need her to know that I'm not the kind of guy who asks for sex as an opening move but I'm not opposed to it if she's the one bringing it up. There's no way to fix this. I failed at this interaction. I need to cut my losses, but somehow we keep talking.

She says, quote "I like making art and love. Sometimes at the same time, ya know?"

I say "do you want to make love?"

She says "we probably should."

I ask her if she'd like to get something to eat first, as was my initial date plan before the porn thing. Her response confused me even more. "I can't right now. I'm exhausted from traveling all weekend. I haven't eaten and feel like I'm gonna pass out." That reply doesn't make sense. It's Wednesday and she says she's too hungry to get dinner. That's when I noticed that her previous message ended with a period.

"We probably should," period. I scrolled back up through our conversation and realized that EVERY message she sent me ended with a period. Every single one! Oh, and some of them weren't even direct responses to anything I said, so now I'm 1000% convinced that she's a bot. I got tricked into talking for three hours with a bot, and I derailed the scam by rolling a nat 1 critical fail when it tried to sext me.

I ask "her" point blank when she wants to meet up, and it said "I need to eat first. Make food, not war, lol. Where are your top places to grab food?"

Bot. Almost certainly a bot.

My final reply, in the extraordinarily small off chance that she's not a bot, was to say it depends on my mood, before losting three or four of my go-to places.

"She" didn't unmatch, but she ghosted me. No reply.

Bot. Absolutely a bot. No doubt about it.

TLDR, I got catfished by a bot!

[mags-writes]

me, 14 and reading the end of mockingjay:

me, 24 and reading the end of the ballad of songbirds and snakes:

[emahriel]

𝐀𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐄𝐦𝐞𝐭-𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐡 drawn by the wonderful DalilahhDalida 🗡️

[dayurno]

omg reverse riko au is making me feel so ill..... please let us know if you have any more thoughts abt riko kayleigh and kevin legend.....

I DO my idea is that its around the same age kevin and riko met in canon so tetsuji kicks the bucket when riko is 7/8 and riko is (very forcibly) removed from the nest and sidelined to kayleigh as a new moriyama asset from the main branch takes over the nest. riko struggles a lot with the change because he is very young and very scared and he’s used to horrible things at tetsuji’s hand, which means that he doesn’t trust kayleigh and finds kevin entirely too weird. it’s honestly really cute because i think at this point obviously 7 year old kevin wants to befriend him but riko is such an anxious ball of anger that most of their interactions are like

baby riko: what do you WANT from me. go AWAY!!!! NOW

baby kevin: (heavy irish accent) nothing i think. do you want a bite of my sandwich?

anyway i think riko and kayleigh do get along but he never really considers her his mother or even godmother, for a long time he thinks of her as his Benefactor until the child therapy starts hitting and she becomes Aunt Kayleigh and then after a few more years he can be loosely convinced to refer to her as auntie once or twice a year. his second son syndrome never really leaves him; in the upcoming years riko struggles with the idea that he’s anything But an add-on to the days and still overworks himself to death trying to be acknowledged by kengo, but it’s leaps better just from being outside the nest and having people to look out for him

riko and kevin have some rough patches, especially during riko’s first years with the days. because kevin is an easy target and riko is afraid of kayleigh he ends up letting a lot of that anger out on kevin, though obviously at this point they are children and riko’s anger manifests in some mild bullying and name calling. i think kevin doesn’t even understand it most of the time 😭 riko has been around grown ups his entire life so his adult level insults make no sense to kevin’s seven year old mind. nevertheless after kayleigh tells him to stop picking on kevin riko does respect it (first out of fear, then later because they actually get along) and they go on to become brothers with only a slight tendency towards antagonism. riko’s jealousy of kevin is still a big part of their relationship and i think even more so when college applications roll around, and he’s even more worried when wymack comes into the picture, but it never culminates into anything as horrible as hand breaking because riko has an actual outlet and a support system :) it’s mostly a yelling match that eventually turns to getting scolded by kayleigh for acting like barbarians

[pinwheelaster]

yea my boyfriend's pretty cool, but he's not as cool as me

[phoenixcatch7]

I know 'person with secret to hide spots other person with secret to hide but doesn't say anything' is like. Thee trope in superhero crossovers, but come on! Some of these guys have been doing this for decades! There's tons of heroes that have gone to pretty extreme lengths to be Completely Imperceptible in civilian life.

Don't you think it's scarier, after all is said and done, to sit there and think I didn't notice a thing? I wouldn't have ever realised? I would never have known? To know that someone you were familiar with - close with, even! - had this whole other personality and skillset and powers and experiences and life just behind the curtain, and they hid it so completely you didn't even see it was there.

'I always knew there was something off' what if you didn't. How world shaking would it be to be so utterly blindsided? To know that this person had somehow learned to so deceptive?

[t8oo]

there is some symbolism iv never considered in that one episod of pt5 where zenigata rescues fujiko before she kills lupin

[titaniumabsol]

Celestin Caron (Dragon Age: Awakening)

Age: 38 (9:31 Dragon) Gender: Male Tarot: The Emperor Nationality/Ethnicity: Chasind/Orlesian-Antivan Class/Specializations: Mage, Blood Mage/Arcane Warrior/Spirit Healer/Shapeshifter (Lvl 31) Love Interest: Seneschal Varel of Vigil's Keep Party Comp.: Nathaniel/Justice, Anders, and Sigrun (But rotates with all pretty regularly)

Background: Born in 8:93 to a Chasind mother and an Orlesian-Antivan father, Caelesyn Caron lived in the familiar swamps of the Kocari Wilds until they were forced to leave due to increasing Templar raids. His father took them to Orlais to live with his family, living in serfdom under an Orlesian noble around Val Firmin. Caelesyn, now called Celestin, developed magic at age 8, and was aided by his parents to hide it.

He was discovered at 19 after a confrontation with the Orlesian noble, and evaded Templars for 5 days until he was caught and locked away in the White Spire. On grounds of good behaviour and a vouch from the Senior Enchanter, he was allowed to entertain nobles in the Imperial Wintersend Ball for a few years until the Enchanter is replaced, and so his sliver of freedom was ripped away. Short after, he received news of his parents' deaths. He escaped and made his way to a Grey Warden outpost in Val Chevin, where he became part of the Wardens.

Returning to Ferelden was, as best as it could be described, a reverse-culture shock. He wasn't back down in the Kocari Wilds but now in the north, dealing with nobles that didn't act like Orlesian nobles. His Chasind roots alienated him from Orlesians, but his Orlesian mannerisms and Chasind influences also alienated him from the Fereledans. And that is ignoring his status as a mage, and one that now held land property as the Arl of Amaranthine.

But, he is a Warden with a Duty. And he would fulfill his roles to the best of his abilities.

[cappurrccino]

so many fears in my brain today...!

[hella1975]

believe it or not i actually wasn’t that drunk last night i was just running off pure vibes bc it turns out a night out in dublin despite bleeding your bank account dry despite tipping it down with rain WILL be the most amazing thing you’ve ever experienced

[thegreatestheaver]

Conventional nightmares are scary but I think it’s the unrealistic ones that are the most scary

[better-call-mau1]

Sidious: “When my new apprentice Darth Vader arrives, he will...take care of you.” 😈😤😏

Nute Gunray and the Separatists, who apparently thought that being ‘taken care of’ by a Sith Lord meant something other than being sliced up: “Wow that sounds like fun! We’ll roll out the welcome wagon!” 😄🥳🤩

[and-stir-the-stars]

Perhaps unsurprisingly, the latest Lonely Children post got quite long, so I'm tagging you both in a new post <3

This could be the point where William tries getting Evan fully on his side, but I like to think that even though he'd trusted the creepy rabbit man over the Fragment, Evan wasn't oblivious to the red flags.... And since Glitchtrap has William's arrogance, he severely underestimates both Evan's intelligence and his willpower. This could lead to Evan learning the truth of who was behind the endless nightmare.

@dire-kumori Evan noticing the red flags!! YESS GOOD FOR HIM! He's been through so much at this point and he SO needs that win (though, i can't help but wonder what Evan thinks of the Fragment after learning the truth about Glitchtrap. Does he realize the Fragment is, at heart, a force of good that Glitchtrap wants to get rid of? Does he assume the Fragment is another one of Glitchtrap's creations put here to trick and manipulate him? Does Evan's fear of it, plus witnessing the Fragment manipulating Vanessa, lead Evan to think of it as more of an "enemy of my enemy is my ally" thing?)

And I also love the thought of Evan trying his hardest to save this kid and just failing at every turn because Michael refuses to leave this awful place [Circus Baby's]. He's certain that something much, much worse will happen if he tries running away from his 'punishment' (even if he doesn't exactly remember what he's being punished for) but he's nonetheless willing to help guide them through the level towards the exit. He's been around long enough that he knows every nook and cranny of this place ("don't go left; that way's the scooping room") and is able to get them out quickly enough. - Dire

Gregory: what's so bad about the scooping room? I could go for some ice cream...

I think another layer that makes Michael refusing to be saved even more heartwrenching is that, once the two of them get their memories back, Mike remembers just how crushing and soul-destroying it was to try saving Evan over and over only to fail and watch his little brother be torn apart so many times. Foxybro obviously doesn't (consciously) remember this, but once he gets his memories back, maybe he's left with the horrible realization that by refusing to be saved, he left Evan subject to the same torment he lived through for so long (not being able to save your brother). He's horrified that, even after everything, he still managed to find yet another way to hurt his little brother (me too, Mike; I have NO idea how you two manage to find new ways to hurt each other with every post and au I see from others or make myself. You'd think you'd run of ways eventually.)

Even when Gregory forcibly drags them both out of Circus Baby's and even before fully getting his memories back, all that self-hatred and self-doubt and the "emotional imprints" left inside him from not being able to save his little bro no matter what he does, just leads him straight back to Glitchtrap. So horribly ironic that he's the one to get completely suckered in; I have no idea what horrors Glitchtrap would have in store for him, but hopefully Gregory and Evan would manage to pull off a rescue mission (and yell at Mike for doing something so stupid.... and let their "little brother" know that they don't care whether he makes the right decisions all the time. They just want him THERE).

This whole time, I’ve been imagining [Mike/Fragment] as the age when his first little sibling was born (be that either Evan or Elizabeth, take your pick) the age where he became a big brother. He’s still so, so little, but has this new, sudden responsibility that he doesn’t quite understand.

@honey-bunnysaurus I am feeling so Reasonable and Normal about the Fragment manifesting as the same age he was when he became a big sibling for the first time. I don't have words for how beautifully painful that is; he is way too young for this really big responsibility that he doesn't understand, AND he's being given a chance to try being a good big brother (well... little brother) again on so many different levels, especially when you incorporate Dire's idea that he constantly flips between ages depending on his mental state. Mike's the one who "faded" inside the Endless Nightmare, too unsure of his place or purpose or ability to save Evan to hold himself together, so it makes sense that he'd be so fragile and unstable in this digital world. Maybe as Mike gets more and more sure of himself and his place with his new brothers, his form becomes gradually more and more stable; or, maybe it's a comfort in and of itself to Foxybro that he can flip between ages and just be himself without the fear of responsibility or judgement or messing up that made him feel the need to hide and be someone something/else even before the Bite.

Gregory still calls him tiny even when Fragment Mike reaches his teenage stage, just because it annoys Mike.  - Honey

Oh for sure. Gregory has an unending supply of nicknames that are some variation of "little bro" and "little guy." Does the use of these nicknames lead to noogie-ing when Mike is in his teenage, or maybe even young adult, form? Absolutely. But Gregory has Goldie on his side, too; they outnumber Foxybro, and Gregory is more than willing to play dirty. Just imagine Foxybro giving Gregory a noogie, Goldie tickling Foxybro to try making him let go, and finally Gregory slams his foot into the back of Foxybro's knee and the three of them collapse into a giggling pile of sibling antics on the ground as they bicker with each other.

Maybe they’d cycle through a bunch of names like the fandom does for him; Chris, Norman, Cassidy, Jeremy, so on and so forth. - Dire

!!!!

i LOVE that. Maybe Gregory throws out a couple names for Ev soon after they first meet, but Evan quietly says he doesn't know if he likes any of them. So, Gregory decides not to ask Evan if he likes the names but to randomly call Evan whatever names he thinks of and sees how his new friend reacts (I imagine a lot of these new names Gregory thinks of are actually popular memes from 2035, or whenever you think SB takes place). Despite Gregory being able to call him 15 different names in the span of five minutes, his new friend still doesn't seem to latch onto any of the ideas, though (some ideas are so bad that his new friend can't help but wrinkle his nose or stick his tongue out at them). Maybe after an exasperatingly long time of trying to find a name, they finally decide Gregory will call Evan Him (capitalization included) and Evan will call himself Me (as reference to Golden Freddy's IT'S ME IT'S ME IT'S ME). It still doesn't quite suit Evan, no, but it's better than nothing... until Evan finds the golden Fredbear plush. It's a major relief to both of them when Gregory looks between the plush and his new friend and the nickname "Goldie" slips from Gregory's smiling lips.

[zelda-posting]

tears of the kingdom could have been so good if it were built around like, its story or its characters instead of being a clunky shell to show off the mechanic no one asked for that it forces you to use

[nordicbananas]

SHROOOOOOOOOOOOMIE!!!!!

YUUUUUIIIII!!!!!! <333333

how are you :}

[venomousraga]

i think i found my new addiction hell in playing cult of the lamb