#i have so much more to say but maybe that´s for a vent post some other day

[berryblu-soda]

been hesitating to post this bc i usually try to be super chill and upbeat, but im also trying to be more genuine, so here it is i guess (im doing okay, dont worry)

this probably warrants a trigger warning even tho nothing ever really happened :/

i´d like to thank from the bottom of my heart the friends ive made on this silly little site, i may be a almost a stranger to some of you, im not the greatest at keeping contact with anyone, but if i call you a friend its because you have very special a place in my heart <3<3<3

when i first made tumblr i was really struggling, it felt almost impossible to see anything lovable in myself, if it were up to my whims back then, i wouldve made myself poof out of existence, leave no trace behind. "Goodbye to that worthless piece of trash, everythings so much better without her"

it wasn´t that there was anything wrong at home, my family´s always been nothing but loving and caring to me, but i just struggled to understand *why* that was, i wasn´t contributing financially, functionally, nor did i excell at absolutely anything (looking back, i didn´t have to, i was literally 14) , everything id ever been remotely good at i knew someone who was better than me by a long shot. i didn´t have any irl friends, i had my cousins, but being family it felt a little like they were conditioned and obligated to love me because we were family

i felt alone despite being surrounded by people who loved me, i´d grown too used to it to recognize it as genuine love, so meeting you guys really helped me know that hey! maybe people arent just nice to me because they feel obligated to be! you guys inadvertedly gave me the support i needed to continue living life! And for that im endlessly grateful for <3

i can recall several times, when i was beating myself up over the simplest of mistakes, i genuinely didn´t want to exist if i wasn´t perfect, but when my spiraling got too bad and i´d even start to think of how i´d explain to yall that i´d finally given up on living, i´d start bawling my eyes out, beause I couldn't do that to yall, I still had messages to reply to, friends to wish happy birthday to... i would be devastated if any of you guys left and i couldn´t do anything to help you

so i made myself stick around, to hold on to whatever i could even if it consisted of numbing myself to the point of it being unhealthy. and ive lost years trying to get a grip and snap back to reality, but i made it! im happy these days, and i know no matter what happens im glad im still alive. And hey, maybe i´ll start digging myself into a pit again eventually, this post has been sitting in my drafts a couple weeks and in that time ive had some less than ideal days where i felt myself slipping into that old, sad, lonely, self deprecating mentality, but the difference between back then and now is that now i know i made it out of there once, and i know what´s real because ive already recognized it before, my family isnt lying to me when they say they love me, my fiends arent lying to me when they say they care about me, the only one whos lying to me is myself, saying im not worth any of that. 

so i´ll say it again, thank you friends, for existing and being there, for being my lifeline and not letting me go off the deep end, and acting as band aids for my emotional self-inflicted wounds, i´m not sure how i can ever pay you back, i´m here if you ever need me, i love you, please take care <3

[kyuuppi]

Genshin men Instagram HCs

Ft. Xiao; Scaramouche; Zhongli; Childe; Alhaitham; Kaveh; Tighnari

(gender neutral reader but wears a dress in Scara & Zhongli's parts)

Xiao // @ a1atus

★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★

Very rarely posts

Never pictures of himself, you’ll only see his face in tagged photos

If he does post, it’s probably a new album cover of a band he likes, a particularly good plate of almond tofu from his favorite café, or—if he’s in a particularly good mood—a cute stray cat that befriended him on the street

Never edits anything but still takes pretty decent photos because he understands basic composition rules

Never tags anything but will sometimes write simple captions like “new guitar”

His pfp has not changed since he made his account and its literally just the blandest selfie you’ve ever seen—but he’s effortlessly photogenic so even when he’s just staring at the camera with a blank expression he looks hot

★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★

Xiao will unintentionally do his loyal boyfriend duties and like all of your posts but he never actually leaves a comment unless you specifically ask him to but you have to tell him what to say or else you’ll just get something like “your hair is nice” LOL

Maybe makes one post related to you but it doesn’t have your face—just picture of your hands holding each other or a photo he secretly took of you from behind as you admire some paintings from when he took you on an art gallery date

Still doesn’t write much in captions but if the post includes you, he always adds a little black heart emoji 🖤

Scaramouche // @ balladeer

★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★

Vehemently claims he’s not chronically online but he definitely is

Def has a dark / emo aesthetic profile and puts more effort into it than he’d ever admit

Uses stories pretty frequently

Usually to show off his game stats and victories or to vent about some annoying inconvenience that's just happened to him 

balladeer Jfc the train is late again I may as well just walk home everyday ffs

All his late night gaming photos are so highly saturated in his pitch black bedroom, the only source of light being his screen on max brightness and his violet RGB keyboard. If you raise the screen brightness on your phone you might be able to make out some empty Monster cans and ramen cups on his desk—he absolutely gives Discord / Reddit mod vibes 🤢

Definitely has a story archive just for Valorant 🤮

I wanna fuck him so bad it makes me look stupid—

Posts a few selfies to show a new piercing or the very rare occasion where he’s feeling really confident in his looks

unintentionally thirst traps the emo boy lovers; yes, I am talking about you and I—

Lightly edits photos or uses filters to make them look good but nothing extreme or super aesthetic, mostly just for decent contrast

Usually the first one to see any of his friends posts but never ‘likes’ them

Will leave snarky or sarcastic comments when the mood strikes tho

His pfp is a candid picture someone else took that he thinks he looks decent in—sticking his tongue out and giving double middle fingers to the camera

★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★

Makes a post or story for every date you guys have, even if it’s just a vague picture of your shoes together

He likes to show off that he has such an attractive s/o but also lowkey just wants to have a memory to look back on for the nights he feels lonely

Doesn’t post just you though, he’s always in frame holding you or touching you in some way—he feels the need to put some sort of claim cause he thinks people are gonna shoot their shot with you—he’s kinda paranoid and insecure, pls have patience w him

Likes and comments on all of your posts. Sometimes it's a snarky quip like if you post about you and your friends doing something funny he might comment “lmao ur so dumb” but if its a selfie or something you’re proud of, he leaves a little compliment and heart emoji.

YN0103 [bedroom mirror selfie of you shyly posing in a dress]

YN0103  Bought a new dress today…it’s not my usual style but I rlly like it 🥺

balladeer cute 💜

If anyone ever confronts him in person about his nice comments on your posts tho he’ll get flustered and claim his account was temporarily hacked LOL

His heart def flutters when you post a picture of him on your own account

He kinda can’t believe you’re proud enough of him to publicly post about him

Changes his pfp to the two of you together and, if you zoom in and squint, you can tell he’s kind of smiling <3

Zhongli // @ rex_lapis

★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★

I’m sorry but I have to do it…

He has Facebook grandpa vibes

Like he has no idea how to use half of the features; stories are an absolute mystery to him. What is a reel?

But he tries to be supportive of his friends and will leave way-too eloquent comments with a Wikipedia levels of supplemental information

a1atus [ photo of a shiny Fender acoustic guitar laying on what seems to be a bed]

a1atus new guitar

rex_lapis Lovely new instrument, Xiao. You seem to have quite good tastes – that particular model is popular among many professional musicians. It is well renowned for its clear sound and beautiful mahogany exterior. If you wouldn’t mind, I would love to hear you play it someday over tea.

a1atus @ rex_lapis thanks

the way I cackled writing that exchange ygweyufgwyu Xiaos just like ‘thanks for commenting dad’

His pfp is not him—it’s probably a famous painting he likes or a beautiful white flower from a garden he visited

★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★

If you want him to improve his Insta game, you’re going to have to teach him, I’m sorry

On the up side, Zhongli is a great student and is eager to learn anything you teach him

Will try to post pretty regularly; usually somewhat mediocre photos of beautiful scenery like sunsets and flowers

Like Scaramouche, he enjoys the idea of documentary your time together so he posts something at the end of each of your dates

Your heart lowkey melts when Zhongli, very earnestly, asks after dinner if you’ll allow him to take a selfie with you to post on his Instagram

Regularly asks for feedback on his posts to ensure he’s properly taking your advice and improving :,)

He even starts organizing and naming story archives on his profile—simple titles like “tea,” “nature,” “friends,” and “my dearest”

Likes and comments on every single one of your posts and replies to all of your stories, even if he was there with you

Usually just lathers you in compliments on your beauty or tastes but they’re so thoughtfully written that it’s obvious he’s not “just saying it” and genuinely believes all the kind things about you he writes

YN1231 [photo of you twirling in a summer dress amidst a colorful of bed of flowers in a botanical garden, take by your friend]

YN1231 It’s finally starting to feel like spring! 🌸🌼🌺

rex_lapis While the camelias are lovely, they pale in comparison to your radiance. Your yellow sundress is also quite lovely and compliments your complexion in the morning sunlight. Truly a divine sight. 

balladeer @ YN1231 @ rex_lapis ugh can you guys keep it in the DMs

- Changes his pfp to a selfie of himself smiling after you told him he should. The angle is a little odd but he’s so naturally attractive that he still manages to look good. 

Ajax // @ tartaglia_on_top 

★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★

Doesn’t post too often but when he does, it kinda gives stereotypical frat boy

Like, lots of parties and shirtless beach photos with his friends

The surprise is the occasional posts of his little siblings and kids he volunteers with in between

He sometimes posts championship and practice photos from his martial arts competitions with captions thanking his team and mentors

Is pretty popular—has a few thousand followers, many are people he met just once or twice at parties or genuine friends and classmates, but the vast majority are online fans who just follow cause he’s hot LOL

Is the type of person you followed once after meeting a long time ago and never talk to again but you can’t bring yourself to unfollow cause he’s nice and his updates are kinda interesting and he’s hot

Isn’t online that much so he doesn’t like/comment on his friends’ every post but usually tries to leave congratulatory messages when someone accomplishes something or graduates

His pfp is a closeup of himself with a boyish grin he cropped from a group photo

★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★

It is super obvious when you guys start dating cause almost every post from that point is about you in some way LOL

tartaglia_on_top [photo of Ajax, sweaty and exhausted but clearly excited as he holds a trophy in one hand with the other wrapped around your waist while he presses a kiss to your cheek]

tartaglia_on_top Officially a 3 year championship winner! Thanks to my biggest supporter @ YN0720 😘

He’s not even consciously trying to post you all the time, it just happens because you are either always together or any memorable moment he thinks are worth an Insta post involve you in some way

You’re the only person, aside from his family - that he actually likes/comments on all posts for

Is the type of boyfriend to leave those super dramatic, embarrassing comments on your selfies like “DAAAMN BABE 🥵 finna make me act UP” and, in one particularly shameless case, “god youre so hot pls step on me queen 😍” 

Please block him

He shamelessly liked all your past posts from before you too met as well—you were kinda mortified to wake up one morning to a notification that just said “what a lil cutie ❤️” on a post of yourself from seventh grade. 

Changes his pfp to a couple selfie he took of the two of you kissing on a winter vacation in the mountains

Kaveh // @ kaveh.designs

★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★

Obsessed with having an aesthetic profile

Like, the color palette of the background and clothing in his pfp selfie are carefully matched with the cover of each of his story archives, down to the hex code

He carefully edits every post and uses filters to make them all fit with his theme no matter how inaccurate to real life they may become

“Huh…I thought your bedroom wall was a bit more orange than this…” 

“Oh, that’s cause I use 30% Juno in all my bedroom photos for a warmer finish.”

“???”

Despite his aesthetic profile, he doesn’t come off as particularly vain or narcissistic—only posts selfies when he’s has a particularly good hair day or changed his accessories

Most of his posts are of places he travels to (museums and big cities with interesting architecture) or his own sketches and rendered design projects

Online pretty frequently, always checks insta when he wakes up, before bed, and during lunch breaks

His stories are often project updates, interesting things he encounters throughout the day, or food photos

Only likes posts he actually likes and sometimes comments with photography critiques

tighnar1 [photo of a cluster of three bright blue mushrooms clustered against vibrant green grass and patches of dark, wet soil]

tighnar1 Proof the forest is an amazing place: found this beautiful little cluster of juvenile Rakkhashava mushrooms on my hike today. Great spotting by @ colleeei. Check my story for some cool mushroom facts. 🍄

kaveh.designs great photo composition, Tigh, perfect golden ratio on the caps.

tighnar1 @ kaveh.designs Thanks I guess…

Has a decent number of followers, many of whom are also artists familiar with Kaveh’s reputation from the Kshahrewar. Others just like his OOTD stories and charming smile

★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★

Kaveh revamps his entire profile once you two become official

His pfp becomes a candid taken by a stranger of the two of you together at an aquarium, holding hands as you point something out to him through the glass

It was taken by a photographer working at the aquarium as part of a promotion—the photographer showed you two the photo and asked for permission to post it on their official website and Kaveh was absolutely obsessed with the photo—it’s still one of his favorite and it doesn’t even show your faces

He still matches his archived story covers to his new pfp but his actual feed had become a lot more relaxed and natural now

He still slightly edits photos so they look as good as possible, but he doesn’t like using filters on photos of you or the two of you together because he thinks it would be a disservice to your natural beauty

Like Ajax, his posts and stories naturally become mostly about you whether scenes from your dates—candid photos he takes of you where he insists you look like art even though you’re just in pajamas with an unmade face—or even photos of things he sees throughout the day that remind him of you

Sometimes he posts stories of funny reels or art pieces he knows you’d like and tags you in them with messages like “@YN0709 omg remember when we were talking abt this?” and “me & @ YN0709💕”

Similar to Childe, leaves the most downbad, dramatic comments on your posts

YN0709 [swimsuit selfie]

YN0709 happy summer! ☀️🌊

kaveh.designs Oh my god my heart– 💘 I cannot believe I get to come home to this every night 👅💦

YN0709 @ kaveh.designs omg kaveh pls 💀

al_haitham @ kaveh.designs Every time I see one of your comments I regret ever learning how to read.

Alhaitham // @ al_haitham  

★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★

Only made an account so his friends would stop bothering him about not keeping up with things tbh

Checks his feed a few times a day but skips through stories if they’re too long/too many

Absolutely hates concert stories the most cause they’d loud, long, and filled with off-key drunken singing

Never likes or comments on anything unless it’s really interesting to him

Occasionally shares reels in his story that are like interesting history facts or official Akademiya announcements

Has a few posts (and only cause Kaveh would not shut up about it) but they’re mostly just pictures of book covers he’d just finished reading with a detailed review or literary analysis as the caption—but he’s mindful of avoiding spoilers for those who haven’t read it

However, he does have one post that stands out quite a bit

He posted an unintentional gym third trap because he just happened to be working out, as is routine, and thought it might be nice to share some tips on proper rope pushdown form 

If you’re not a gym babe and don’t know what this is, I beg of you, please look up a gif or video and imagine Alhaitham doing this, shirtless. You’re welcome.

It has become his most popular post by far

His pfp is probably taken straight from his faculty ID card: plain background, bright lighting, neutral facial expression

★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★

After you two have become official and are pretty comfortably established in your relationship, he’ll post a photo of the two of you—probably one you took - with a simple caption like “Late night at Puspa Café with my favorite person 💚”

Everyone who knows him freaks out in the comments with variations of “omg hathie got an s/o???” and “wow he finally posted a normal pic of himself, y/n is a good influence” but he doesn’t reply to any of them lmao

If you use Instagram a lot, he’ll naturally become more active too because he enjoys learning more about what you like through your posts and stories

He likes all of your posts but never comments—if one of your posts interests him, he’d prefer to wait until he sees you later to ask you about it in person 

He just wants an excuse to talk to you more

As he becomes more active, little bits and pieces of your relationship naturally infiltrate his feed

His latest book review post has your favorite mug in the background because the two of you had breakfast together

His informational story post of an antique Sumerian emerald he found at a street vendor is being modeled by your pretty hands because you were with him when he saw it and later given to you after the vendor insisted on Alhaitham gifting it to his “beautiful spouse”

He changes his profile picture to the two of you from one of your many reading dates, comfortably lounging on a loveseat in a quiet corner of the library—and this time, he’s softly smiling

Tighnari // @ t1ghnar1

Surprisingly active on social media

He thinks social media is a great way to share information about the importance of forest conservation and get people to appreciate the beauty of Avidya forest

Makes one post almost every day and multiple stories

Needless to say, 90% of his posts are of plants or small animals he finds on his hikes or while working

His most popular posts are those of cute squirrels and birds that are being nursed back to health after being found wounded—animals just seem to naturally love him so the pictures are usually taken by his coworkers because his arms are full with cuddly animals that refuse to move

The other 10% of his posts are from the occasional hang outs with friends or coworkers after work—snaps of iced fruit teas from Puspa café or colorful clay plates overflowing with Collei’s homemade pita pockets. 

He makes sure to reply to or at least like every comment, particularly those from people asking questions about the plants he posts or how to become a forest ranger. Even simple “wow that's so cool” comments often get at least a “thanks, glad you liked it” from Tighnari

He tends to use some cute forest or food emoji when they fit with his posts. For example, 🍄,🥙,🦊,🐦, etc.

Also tends to use “:)” when replying to his followers because he knows it can be difficult to read tone in text-based communications

Tigh is basically a social media manager at this point oops

Because he is online so much, he naturally keeps up with almost everything his friends post and will like or comment on things he finds interesting

His pfp is a selfie of himself with a small yellow bird perched on his shoulder from one of his patrols

★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★

All Tighnaris written by me WILL follow the “fennec foxes mate for life” trope regardless of AU, it is an indisputable law of the universe

If you’re in a relationship with Tighnari, you should be prepared for stability and commitment in general

While he doesn’t go out of his way to make an official announcement post or anything like that, you become a regular feature on his page

Will tag you in anything you’re related to, unless you specifically ask him not to

t1ghnar1 [photo of a small, cream-colored fox brushing itself against Tighnari’s leg and looking up at the camera with large eyes]

t1ghnar1 On a walk with @ YN1229 this morning we spotted this cute little kit without her mom. 🦊 While adorable, foxes - even kits - are wild animals and should never be approached unless by professionals. We have informed the local animal control where she will be taken care of until we can locate her family. Photo by @ YN1229

He never outright announces you as his lover but he seems to spend so much time with you and refer to you so casually that his followers who don’t know him just assume you’re his spouse LOL

He doesn’t bother to correct them either :,)

bennie_boy Wow, that mountain is so high up - wasn’t ur spouse scared to go up there?

t1ghnar1 @ bennie_boy Y/n has been on so many trips like this with me that they’re pretty used to it. :)

Likes your posts as he see them on his feed and occasionally leaves a short comment like, “beautiful <3”

[faeriekit]

Health and Hybrids (XXVII)👽👻💚

[I can't remember the original prompt posters  for the life of me but here's a mashup between a cryptid!Danny, presumed-alien!Danny, dp x dc, and the prompt made the one body horror meat grinder fic.]

🖤Chapter navigation can be found here🖤 Click to browse previous updates.

💚 Ao3 Is here for all parts 💚 (now featuring mediocre mouseover translations, only available on a computer)

Where we last left off... Danny has another hashtag breakdown! Diana helps mediate. Stinky Dad and the Alien Guy observe.

Trigger warnings for this story:  body horror | gore | post-dissection fic | dehumanization (probably) |  my nonexistent attempts at following DC canon. On with the show.

💚👻👽👻💚

Danny’s space-watching time is very important to him. He’s pretty sure it’s on his schedule, even.

Every few days—and even more days in a week, now that people are relatively certain that he’s not going to start hitting the medical staff—Danny gets wheeled over to the big window to stare out at the moon.

The moon hasn’t changed all that much since his first few visits, since. You know. It’s in space. Still, the stars shift in their positions, and sometimes they face Earth, and sometimes they do not, and a couple times Danny sees people flying out there, which is super neat.

Sometimes Danny sees maintenance workers out doing repairs on their buildings, too. They wave back at him when they’re not busy or carrying something, which makes Danny’s core bubble and spark with joy.

So, Danny is watching the stars twinkle in the sky with all the meditative calm his Obsession requires when something plops onto his head. It doesn’t hurt, but it does put pressure onto his neck. Ow.

Danny hisses automatically, but he already knows who it is—the quick-fast-kid-who-hasn’t-introduced-himself practically vibrates against Danny’s skin, all excited by omg/omg/misch/iefomg.

Typical. Danny wants to feign a bite, but his neck kind of hurts. He settles for grumbling. “What?”

“Dude,” the teenager says, or, uh, Danny approximates he says something kind of like dude, anyway— “Want to come see a feoht?”

Uh. “A what?” Danny asks, ignoring how the guy’s chin keeps digging into his scalp. It might be the most non-medical physical contact Danny’s had since he broke down with Diana. Maybe.

The teen backs up, and models some very quick punches into the air, making his own sound effects to match. It’s all very impressive, or whatever. Danny’s not going to applaud, though; his arms are tired.

“…Sure.” It’s not like Danny has anything better to do.

“Berstan!” the kid chirps, and—

Danny clamps down on his wheelchair wheels because holycraptheyaremoVINGFAST. His wheels aren’t on the ground—the teen is carrying him, chair and all—!

He’s going to be in so much trouble for running. Danny’s wheels touch the ground, and he drops straight to the floor. His hands shake all the way up to his elbows as he grips his wheels. He is going to be in so much trouble when the nurses look for him and he’s not there.

Oh no. Oh no.

“Here we are!” the quickfast teenager announces, grinning. They’re in a room with a big, rubberized floor. It’s basketball orange. The rest of the room is virtually indistinguishable from the cloth folding walls Casper High uses to divide the gym into smaller gyms—giant cloth panels line every surface that isn’t the floor. Walls. Ceiling.

Well. It’s certainly…sound dampening. There’s vents, though. So. At least they can breathe.

The other teenagers Danny recognizes yell out to them, cheerful as ever. One waves—the kid behind him waves back, and then they’re all clustered together, pleased and breathing heavy and slightly sweaty.

“Feel alright?” one teen asks—Danny recognizes him after a second; he usually has a leather jacket on over his brightly colored shirt. He isn’t sure what the huge S is for, but hey, it’s a cool emblem or whatever. Danny used to have his initial on his…

…Danny doesn’t want to think about that, actually. He doesn’t want to think about anything about home at all.

Oh. Someone asked him a question, and now they’re all looking at him for answers. Danny nods jerkily—something sloshes inside his skull, though, which. Ew. He scrunches his face up when everyone else starts to look worried about his expression, though; it’s no big deal! It’s just! Gross!

The boy who is very fast pats his hand before sliding to the other side of the room. There are buttons there, which he presses; the room shifts, just a little, to make a piece of the floor turn away in favor of a rack of weapons. The teenager who’s always masked, but is now in an exercise shirt, whistles approvingly, and two of the teens—whoah—start flying off to grab at the equipment available.

…There’s some cool stuff there. Danny. Danny might…

He doesn’t want to fight, per se, but. Um. Weaponry is intrinsically cool. There’s no doubt about it. Half the reason he liked to play Doomed was collecting the newest and coolest weapon to blast at all his enemies with! And Tuc—

—and—

—Tucker—

Something clicks right up in front of Danny’s face.

He flinches.

“You good?” the teenager asks, big blue eyes on him as Danny struggles to breathe. “Do you want hweorfan?”

Danny gasps around three uneasy breaths before his ears catch up. Or. Well, his ears work, but his brain doesn’t know what the teen is saying?? Danny shakes his head anyway—he doesn’t want more to happen. He wants less.

The teenager frowns. Danny immediately worries that he did something wrong. “Okay, but tell me if you change your mod.”

As soon as Danny figures out what that is? Sure. He’ll tell him.

In the meantime, the kids split up into groups; one set of two goes to one side of the gym and the other goes in the air, floating on the other si— wait, they can float??

…Danny stares, and two ostensibly human-looking teenagers take to the air, loudly teasing the two left on the ground, and, yeah. They’re flying. Danny watches as the one on the ground starts counting, ready to start their match, only to interrupt his own countdown for a sneak-attack at the start and a PIFF of a smoke bomb going off. Danny can’t see the buzzing kid disappear from sight as the air begins to thicken, but there’s a distinct taste of JOY/games/VICIOUS that flutters through him that tells Danny that, wherever he is in that smoke cloud, he’s living his best life.

 And. Well.

The fighting is—there isn’t a better word for it, it’s just so damn cool. There’s kicking and punching and throwing and tossing and—sure, Danny can take a few hits and deal out some surprise punches when he has to, but these kids know what they’re doing, which is so cool, because once Danny lost the benefit of gravity mid-fight basically everything Mom had trained in him had been thrown out the window. The physics were just never right.

(And— Mom—)

Like, all the punches are happening at speeds that Danny can only kind of follow. His neck starts hurting from trying to follow them—but he can’t stop watching, and the kids are really having a blast. They’re laughing. They’re teasing. They show off, even, stopping to pose and flex and be admired by their sole observer, which Danny obliges with some gentle claps. The others are quick to jump on any distraction, though, and are more than willing to have Danny be the center of attention while they sneak up on showstoppers, stick or lasso in hand.

On one hand, Danny should probably be more alarmed by the sight of kids acting as literal child soldiers training to be combat ready. He…he’s pretty sure he’s meant to be one of them as soon as he’s recovered enough to get trained.

And…it is scary. It is kind of a scary thought that Danny might have to go back to…go back to fighting and getting hit and hitting and everything that fighting means.

On the other hand, there’s no one here. All the kids here are Danny’s age, and they’re not fighting because someone is making them; they’re having fun, and their job is to help people.

…Danny puts his legs higher up on his wheelchair, until he can wrap his arms around his knees. They’re supposed to beat up threats, but they don’t think that Danny’s a threat. They’re letting him sleep in a bed and get medical care and making sure he gets medication and everything. They let him hang out with their children and he has toys and fidgets to pass the time, and maybe he’ll have to pay them back later, but… isn’t helping out because he got helped only fair?

And they let non-humans live on Earth! That one teen’s stinky dad said that they could help Danny stay on Earth, he thinks. Or, uh, it’s what he thinks the green guy translated that as? So as long as he doesn’t leave, they could even protect him from the— all the bad stuff on Earth! So really, all Danny has to do is work on getting better. He’s safe here. Diana is here, the stinky dad is here, and there’s a whole team of super-people with super powers ready to help people.

Danny’s safe. He’s calm. He’s fine. He’s…worried that Diana doesn’t know where he is, but she’s smart and there’s probably cameras.

He watches the teens play around with various weaponry like they’re his model rocket. There’re thrown projectiles and giant hammers and dodgeballs and sticks, staves, and lassos; someone pulls out a shield, of all things, glittering gold and gleaming with something that itches at the back of Danny’s eyeball, and there’s a gun that sh—

Danny only breaks out of the memory of RUNNINGRUNNINGRUNNING when he realizes that someone is holding him. He’s choking. He doesn’t know who’s holding him, but they’re not hurting him right now and he can see a crowd of other colorful figures around him, which means he’s not with the Guys in White.

He’s hyperventilating. He can’t help it. He can’t stop it! His lungs hurt and there’s no end to the stress pressing out of his chest. Someone is holding him; where’s his chair? Did he lose it?? That’s really expensive medical equipment—they’re going to be so mad at him—!

Someone lifts him out of the stranger’s arms. It’s one of the older quick-buzzing humans. Not the teenager, and not the oldest one, he thinks. Danny can’t tell. He can’t breathe, and it’s hard to focus.

He’s shushing Danny like he’s a kid. Danny would be insulted, except he can’t breathe, and he really wants someone to help him, and his eyes are all weird and he can’t see and he doesn’t know where he is and his core hurts and his chair is gone—

Oh. The guy puts Danny’s hand on his chest and models breathing in with one big, visible breath.

Danny breathes in.

The guy models breathing out. It’s a long, slow breath.

…Danny struggles through the follow-through, but he manages. Well. He chokes hard enough to cough, twice, but…close enough.

The colorful forms milling about slowly disperse, until it’s largely just Danny, and the fast guy radiating very measured levels of calm, and his friend in black and blue, who is eating a sandwich. They breathe in, and they breathe out. That one guy eats his sandwich.

Danny looks around. He’s…the room he’s in is really big. Tables. Benches. Little stands of foo… Oh. He’s in a cafeteria. Cool.

…He squints through the new haze of green in his eyes. He’s probably strained something, but there are more important things at stake here: can he get some real food here?

“Where is here?” Danny asks. Rasps. He’s mostly horizontal, so manipulating his head around to glance at his surroundings is kind of a strain on his neck. Is that a hot dog cart?

“Wistheall,” the two say simultaneously—the guy in black and blue and a bird on his chest swallows his sandwich. “…Want a snakka?”

You know what? Danny’s going to assume that this means a snack. Sure! Why not. Nodding his head so quickly hurts, but he’s also not walking anywhere, so it’s not like it’s a full-body pain. The buzzing-quick guy sort of just…carries him around and asks Danny what he wants, and the bird guy gets it for him.

The little vibrations the guy is giving off are tinged a little with wor/ryworry/worry, but the guy’s mostly…at peace? Forcibly shoved it all down? Danny and the guy are practically chest to chest at this point, so it’s probably just that Danny’s close enough to feel even really quiet things.

His suit is super smooth, by the way. It’s not, like, skintight—there’s a little armor underneath, Danny can feel—but the fabric itself is like super slick. It’s cool. Texturally.

Also, he gives Danny a tube of something that are clearly off-brand Prongles, so Danny’s mostly just enjoying that instead of wondering what’s up with this guy and his friend.

“Are you okay?” the guy finally asks, his chatter mostly winding down into a question Danny can recognize. Danny swallows his bite of chips with a swig from his water bottle, and nods. He’s…unsettled, but he’s fine. He doesn’t know where he is, but he didn’t know where the teenagers had left him either, so this is about what he expected.

Even under his red hood-and-mask, the guy’s eyes are kind. Kinda worried. Not mean. “Something bad happened?”

…Danny looks back at his chips. Something bad happened, but it didn’t happen recently. “No,” Danny muttered around the crumbs in his mouth. He swallowed dryly. “Not…not now.”

The vibrations slow, and dim, melancholy lacing through the air. The sensation makes Danny itch. “Before?”

Danny nods. He thinks about his body melting from the outside in, his face dripping off in chunks of wet matter, his throat torn open still screaming.

“It was a—“ Danny tries, but he doesn’t actually know their word for gun or blaster. He just forces his fingers to make a familiar symbol, holding his own middle and end fingers back, leaving a shaking, uncomfortable thumb and pointer.

The quiet pew pew sound effects probably aren’t necessary, but the more detail, the better, or something like that.

Danny remembers how hot it got. Just…all the heat and light, and he could smell smoke right up until he couldn’t. And his face…everything hurt—everything still hurts, even—but the scary point had been when suddenly his face hadn’t hurt, and there was nothing left to feel.

…The guy holding him pulls Danny’s fingers away from his face. Oh. Danny was pulling at his still-green, still-healing wound. He. Uh. He doesn’t remember starting to do that anymore.

“Sorry,” Danny whispers. He swallows something wet from his sinuses to his stomach, and has to fight back the memory of a blood-and-ecto-and-flesh slurry taking its place in his esophagus as he tried to crawl away to die. Again.

The man sends out pulses of sorrysorrysorry through his skin. “Me too,” he murmurs back.

Then Danny gets hitched up—Danny squawks—and gets thrown into a better position over one shoulder, so Danny has better height to see from and a better perch in the guy’s arms. Danny drops half his prongles on the floor in the process. “Want to go find your chair?” the guy asks, body vibrating just a touch outside of Danny’s conscious awareness. Still, even without seeing the guy’s face, his whole body radiates sympathy/curiOSITy/Hungry.

…Didn’t they just eat?

Either way, Danny’s not torn between staring sadly at the ground where his prongles lay cold and bared to the cruelty of the world or getting up to go find his chair. “Yes,” he agrees, and uses the flat of his forearms to haul himself up higher onto the guy’s shoulders. Kindly, the guy in red doesn’t even budge. “Thank you.”

“Na geswincan,” the guy reports back easily, which Danny is pretty sure is a less-formal you’re welcome. Too bad there’s a whole language’s worth of context Danny’s missing out on here. His friend even snags Danny an extra can of prongles, and is kind enough to rips open the seal for him.

Nothing beats recovering from a crying jag like chips. Danny takes them earnestly.

The quick-fast guy hooks his arm onto his friend’s, and the world starts to stretch and blend into the in-between planes of reality, slices of world layered atop each other. The guy smashes through each one and pulls them both along for the ride.

It’s not quite like dunking his head in the portal, but it’s not not like sticking his head in a homemade portal either. Danny shakily pulls out a chip and starts chewing. He’ll just take the ride as it comes.

*

“Superboy.”

Kon winces.

“Robin.” Wonder Woman’s eyes turn to the more remorseful end of the bunch. “Wonder Girl. Impulse.”

“Wedidn’tmeanto!” Bart wails into a pillow, which. Fair. Cassie is sweating from possibly every pore she’s ever had (and maybe even a few she doesn’t??), and Tim is doing that stoic-faced thing that means he’s flipping the hell out too much to even tell his face to make expressions about it.

Kon just looks…miserable. Just absolutely miserable.

“…Triggered by firearms, maybe…?” Tim mutters under his breath, which means that he’s theorizing about their guest’s symptoms rather than coming up with solutions-oriented paths out of this confrontation and Cassie wants to shake him because this is NOT the time, Timothy Jackson Drake, except he’s kind of made of mortal human flesh and if she actually shakes him too hard he might die.

“I hope you understand how deeply irresponsible it was to take our patient out of his rooms without any form of supervision from either myself, his medical team, or an adult up to speed with our patient’s medical and psychological needs.” Wonder Woman’s voice is sharp—and her eyes are on Timmy Wonder Boy, who’s barely paying attention, making it clear that the majority of her ire is currently on him. “All four of you are being taken off of mission rosters for the next month in favor of remedial training. I hope that you are all satisfied with the decisions you made.”

“Fiiiine,” Cassie groans. Kon slumps in place. Tim nods without really looking.

Bart, still wailing at lightning speed into his pillow, continues doing…that.

[incorrect-trolls-imagines]

Hi! How was your day? Good,i hope?

Anyways,I found your account recently and I really liked your partner squad AU! It's so wholesome and funny 😭 And I love Polyamorous relationships (i guess that's what it is?)

Here's a little headcanon (?) request for them,because I read the 'loosing colors' HC and I think that was just my favorite thing out of the partner squad thingies-

Honestly,I just want some hurt/comfort. I like crying (/j)

I give total freedom to you about what angst it is,but if you want,or are out of ideas,here are some:

-Reader comes back home after being harassed (not s3xually,maybe just about the way they act? Maybe they just stick out a lot and some people don't like it??? Some people are bullies man..)

-Overworked reader (Maybe breaking down??)

-Socially anxious reader?

-the reader fainting suddenly??

Something like that! Anyways,I hope this isn't too vague of a description,and that you have a fantastic day!!

-Nina/Weewoo

HII HELLO!!! THANKS FOR THE REQUEST AND I HOPE YOU'RE HAVING A NICE DAY TOO!!! AND I'M GONNA DO ALL OF THEM IDEAS YOU SENT CUZ I'M A SUCKERRRR FOR ✨A N G S T✨

okey dokey folks! we've gots some ✨A N G S T✨ to go through so it's-a time to get-a cooking!

Here's the Loosing Colors post btw and I'm gonna use that one just for this first scenario (omg. a sequel, yes!)

💙♥️🖤Partner Squad Reacting to Gray!Reader getting harassed💙♥️🖤

💞 As a whole 💞

💞 Oh, they pissed. As soon as they find out that you've been having trouble with some inconsiderate trolls being nasty to you for having lost your colors, you can bet they're practically up in arms and very eager to have a talk with those bullies.

💞 (You're mortified and somehow manage to convince them to Not Do Anything To Harsh for your sake, though.)

💞 Lots of reassurance!

💞 Your partners won't allow you to sulk or dwell too much in the whole ordeal and they'll make a combined effort to always lift your spirits up whenever you start to believe the rude and flat out unnecessary things the bullies said to you.

♥️ Barb ♥️

♥️ She's easily the most outraged out of the lot. She hates bullies (kinda ironic, yeah, but you get the idea.).

♥️ Particularly, she hates bullies that joke and tease about such sensitive topics as losing your colors. Because, c'mon, that's just straight up professional huge a-hole behavior.

♥️ Whenever she wants to help you feel more comfortable with your situation, she'll take your hands in hers and raise them to your eye level, as if wanting you to take a good look of your laced fingers.

♥️ “Y’see? I'm sorta gray too, if you think about it. But I think you rock those grays way better than me, babe.” (She's intentionally corny to get a smile out of you and it works every time.)

♥️ She tries to get back at the bullies, but she's always too obvious and you never let her have the payback she's so adamant you deserve.

🩵 Branch 🩵

🩵 He can relate.

🩵 Oh, he can relate a lot. He grew up gray and, man, can trolls be cruel even if they seem to be all sunshine and rainbows. Not to say ‘he’s had it worse’ when he was younger, no, he's not the type to downplay a situation like this, ever, but he's definitely the best candidate to help you go through this ordeal because of his past.

🩵 Lot's of open-heart talks, venting, hugs and, yes, lots of tears from both sides as well (just don't go around telling everyone, please).

🩵 He's still devastated that something as awful as losing one's colors could ever happen to you but he can't mope about it forever (never in front of you, at least); he remains strong for your sake.

🩵 He also tries to ‘avenge’ you in whatever way he can, almost begging you to let him at least do something to deal with the ones that bothered you, anything, but you never give in and eventually he gives up (very reluctantly).

🧡 Hickory 🧡

🧡 Now, Hickory over here, he's actually the only one that manages to evade your suspicions and he flat out threatens the trolls that harassed you to buck off (in an eerily peaceful and very cowboy-ish manner, might I add).

🧡 After that, you don't ever get bothered again and Hickory lets you believe that those trolls simply had a change of heart.

🧡 His way of helping you go through this hardship is not by ignoring the issue, but he just rather not mention the obvious unless it's absolutely necessary.

🧡 It's not like he's in love with you for your colors or whatever, but he does care deeply for your mood and feelings. He just wants you to be happy, y'know?

🧡 When the time comes that your colors gradually start to show up again, he just smiles and he'll go out of his way to always remind you of how beautiful those shades and tones look on you even if they're still a bit dim.

🩷 Poppy 🩷

🩷 She's frustrated, very, very much so. Why and how can other trolls be so mean and nasty???? Like Why?

🩷 After finding out about the way you were harassed, she gets clingy. She gets clingy because now she doesn't want to leave you all on your own, exposed to more mistreatment.

🩷 Just like Branch, she's familiar with the subject of color loss and she doesn't take it lightly for a second.

🩷 You could even say it's a bit of some sort of guilt she feels about the way Branch used to be treated in the past that she's now worried 24/7 about you.

🩷 She refuses to allow anyone even think about ostracizing you; she'll go feral if she ever catches someone even batting an eye at your lack of vibrant colors, let alone comment anything on the matter in a negative way.

💚 Tresillo 💚

💚 He's still not entirely used to seeing you without those lovely colors of yours and he's not shy to admit out loud that he misses them.

💚 But he doesn't do that to make you feel bad, or inadequate or guilty on any level; he's just honest like that, and he hopes for the day that your beautiful colors return.

💚 Then, and only then, he'll know you're really and truly okay. And if you're happy, he's happy.

💚 Like Poppy, he gets overprotective and almost overbearing just so he can keep an eye over you so no one else dares bother you in the slightest about your color loss.

💚 He won't threaten anyone like Hickory did, but he will glare and give the worst of stink eyes at whoever steps out of line in his presence, and man, he can look kinda scary when he's serious like that.

💙 Trollex 💙

💙 Like mentioned before, Trollex once lost his colors too after the passing of his parents, but that particular experience he has on the subject is what gives him the reassurance he needs that you can get better, just like he did and just like Branch did as well.

💙 The thought of someone bullying you for your situation makes his blood boil but he's more concerned on how you feel and what you think.

💙 Forget those bullies, they don't matter now. Now it's all about you and how you feel and what you need.

💙 He becomes a bit of a mother hen, always asking about your mood and hoping that one of these days, your bright colors will shine bright once again.

💙 He's a great listener, so if you need a shoulder to cry on or just vent, he'll always be there, ready to give you advice and make sure you always leave with a huge smile on your face.

[tommykinard6]

Read your vent post and I agree. I ship Buddie and Bucktommy, and have been around fandom long enough to see how quickly toxic fandom people are louder than anything else and are trying to take over the spaces. It also doesnt help people dont always disclose information in the tags, which defeats the whole purpose of using ao3.

I love bucktommy and the potential healthy bi/queer representation the characters can give us. However, I'm also tired of trying to find Bucktommy fics only for it to end up being the "buck breaks up with him or cheats on him for eddie because he loves eddie more" or they turn Buck into some kind of invalid and completely ignoring the emotional growth he's had throughout the show. Or they just Buck using Tommy in general. Maybe Buck 1.0 would do that, but not post lightning Buck.

People can write whatever they want but Buck's character growth has been important to me since I started watching 911 and seeing people wreck a beautiful chance for Buck to grow into himself without the stakes of it being Eddie because Buddie goggles are glued on their eyes is exhausting. I'm a big supporter of DLDR so I usually just try to ignore most of it but it's taxing trying to filter through all the noise sometimes.

~ Anon 🌸

Anon, you’re so sweet and you make many good points.

For all writers and readers out there, use the tag system to your benefit. Tag your work appropriately. And if you’re deliberately not tagging correctly, then you shouldn’t be posting. Also, I’m decently sure that goes against some of ao3’s rules. Correct me if I’m wrong.

Buck’s character growth has been so beautiful and so much and I hate to see people throwing it down the drain. Eddie and Buck’s growth exist outside of each other as well as inside their bond.

DLDR for the win! (Don’t like don’t read for anyone who had to take a second to translate it like I did 🤣)

Again, I can’t say anything better than what you’ve already said, anon! You made great points and I think a lot of people can relate to your thoughts.

On a whole separate note, I’m considering making a fic rec list on here that’s full of solely BuckTommy fics (no cheating or placeholder Tommy or anything) but it’d be a lot to maintain. Would anyone want that?

[allthehumanflaws]

The Umbrella Academy S4

If you haven't completed season 4 please don't read any further

This is my complete rant- I just ughhh ohkay

So the ending huh I don't even know what to say. I don't know what that was. Was it just me or did someone else also presume that Viktor would be the one dying?? Why did all of them die? It seems so rushed. Just 5 minutes between Five realizing what's gonna happen and what they need to do and then just bam it's over i'm sorry what the fuck- I had so much hope and thrill and passion going into this season all doomed.

Don't even get me started on the Five and Lila thing. hey stevie when some of the people said they'd like to see a number five romantic subplot...... THIS IS NOT WHAT THE MEANT!?!? You're tryna tell me Five "survived 45 years in an apocalypse killed hundreds and thousands of people and the board of directors of a deadly commission just to get back to his family and keep them safe" Hargreeves the Five Hargreeves who had many a year and opportunity to find himself a woman after joining the commission but stayed loyal to a fucking mannequin fell in love with his brother's wife after 7 years of being stuck with her? SPECIALLY after he specially told Diego that Lila wouldn't throw all that away he fell in love with her and was heartbroken when she didn't throw that away????? What of the frenemy dynamic? What of the 'you killed my parents in cold blood' part of that equation? All gone cause of what? I see no point or use of that in the already fucked storyline? I don't even know what to say.

Luther had NO character this season. He's just a big soft bag of fluff I mean i don't hate that not at all but like... and his powers were just reduced to what... accidentally breaking an alarm clock and jumping of a stage into a crowd of women? yay i guess. And WHERE WAS SLOANE? WHAT HAPPENED TO HER?

Klaus oh my poor heart- a germaphobe. Really a germaphobe? Of all the things he could've been. When the grave scene happened where they were shooting outside and he covered his ears I got so excited like yes yes Vietnam Klaus... I mean yeah he's traumatized but I thought they'd work with that even just a little bit but no. None of that just terrified of ghosts druggie Klaus.

Allison Hargreeves - I have a vent about her already posted. And there it seems I hate her and maybe a little yeah but that means there was like a pacific load of area they could've worked with but no? none of that. She is just back to normal a little scared but that's all. "Since Ray walked out!" THAT"S ALL WE GET FROM RAYMOND CHESTNUT!? What why how when under what conditions??????????? Nothing?? Huff man. I know this is too much for one season and I know they couldn't have included everything in one season but they had such a great show. Such a brilliant show. Season 3 was a very apt ending. It was perfect to be very honest, this is just uncalled for. All the characters are so not who we as viewers were shown for 3 seasons which is why I feel it feels more like a disappointment. Yeah without their powers they'd be different, but they're just not them anymore.... Anyway I should probably sleep.

Tell me what you think of all this :)

[amorisastrum]

How to use tone tags! :D

Because @flaming-green asked and also neurodivergence !!

Long post woah

Commonly used tone tags:

/j = joke

/hj = half joke

/ly or /lyr = lyrics

/pos = positive

/neg = negative

/lh = light hearted

/nm = not mad

/s or /sarc = sarcastic

/nbh = no body here (this is used alongside a rant/vent that has not named a specific person- people may think you are talking about them and spiral)

/genq = genuine question

/nf = not forced

/plat = platonic

/r = romantic

/srs = serious

/t = teasing

Why use tone tags?:

Tone can be a very difficult thing to pick up, especially through text. Use of punctuation and capital letters and certain word choices can make a sentence seem completely different. For example, if I received a text saying "Come see me right now." I would instantly think I was in trouble and would panic. However, if I received that same message with a "/nm" I would feel much better about the situation. People use punctuation in different ways as well! I personally use exclamation marks to show how excited I am !! While for others, a multitude of exclamation marks could indicate sarcasm. Same with the use of emojis. I personally use some emojis to indicate sarcasm, but I know people who use those same emojis to indicate... Well, what the emoji is showing. So, to use a tone tag avoids any sort of miscommunication.

When to use tone tags?:

Deciding when to use tone tags can be difficult. I personally use tone tags when I reread a message and realise it is ambiguous in tone, or when I reread it, it sounds more aggressive or rude than I intended it to be.

If somebody asks you what you mean by a message, this is probably a sign that you need a tone tag of sorts. Not all people are going to interpret things the way you intend them to be, so tone tags as a whole are helpful to avoid miscommunication. Sometimes the context of the message being sent can change someone's perception so tone tags are not always needed e.g. "omg I love you so much! You're so awesome!" This may be seen as genuine, while "omg you're so awesome." Can be seen as sarcastic. It depends on how that person's brain works.

If you are talking directly with one person, or a small group of people, and you know their typing habits (such as using emojis for sarcasm or use of punctuation) then tone tags may be needed less! But if you are talking to a group of people, such as on Tumblr, it may be easier to use tone tags as more people will see what you've said and... Well people may not understand what you meant!

Some words may have different connotations through different contexts, such as the word "silly". But sometimes people may not understand that context. I typically use Silly in a positive way, but at one point I referred to a character I didn't like as a "silly man" with my friend who had no clue who this character was. To them, this meant I liked this character, which left them confused when I started talking about them in a bad way. So, I started adding "/neg" anytime I meant silly in a negative way to avoid confusion.

Other tone tag things:

Try and avoid piling of tone tags at the end of a message/post as this can be confusing. Id say try to use no more than 2, 3 at a maximum.

If you're cutting into the middle of a message with a tone tag, you can use brackets, but you don't have to! Do what makes you comfortable.

Use punctuation where you see fit.

You don't have to use tone tags for every message you send/everything you post! Use them when YOU think the tone could be ambiguous or if someone has directly asked you what you mean.

You don't have to know every tone tag ever. I've been using tone tags for a good 2 maybe 3 years now and I mainly use /nm, /j, /srs, /sarc and /pos.

I also use /silly, which I'm not sure is an actual tone tag. I use this if something I say seems passive aggressive or if I am in fact just being silly.

I hope this has helped! Tone tags are something that help me communicate with people and make me more comfortable! And I hope they can make it easier for you to communicate as well :]

Also sorry if this makes little sense it is 2am. Feel free to add any more information in reblogs or replies!!

[writingwife-83]

Ok listen, I have thoughts about s4 of Miss Scarlet and the Duke. I’ll put them below the cut due to spoilers. If you haven’t watched yet and you don’t want to know things ahead of time, please don’t read below!

Look, I get it. I get that this is a slow burn drama type of story line going on here between Eliza and William. But for the love of all that’s good and holy, I’m bout ready to slap the writer/s. 😤 you can only have so many “will they, won’t they” moments in a plot before it becomes ridiculous. IMO it’s becoming ridiculous in this season. It’s drama for the sake of drama, and it could be done in other ways. The lack of honest communication that’s keeping them apart has become more unrealistic since it’s gone on this long.

They should have just got them together by the end of this season! Develop the two of them as a couple who’s courting, and then eventually married in the next season or two. There’s oodles of drama that could come up when you think of those two in an established relationship while still trying to work in their field. I think writers are afraid to get the main ship together because then the thrill is gone and people will lose interest. But I don’t think that happens if it’s done well! Idk it’s just become a bit much for me and I hate to admit but I was barely interested in watching the last 2 episodes with William not even there. And all they did is mention she was finally writing to him! Not even a scene of writing a letter? No voiceover of what she’s saying to him?? 🙄

My biggest fear is that they did this toward the end of the season because they’re going to be phasing the Duke’s character out in some way. Seems unlikely based on the title, but still. Or maybe the actor won’t be able to return and he’ll be recast. You can call me shallow or whatever, but I probably won’t care to watch this show if his character, or maybe even the actor, leaves.

On a positive note, I loved what they did with Fitzroy’s character this season! I feel like he’s had a lot of development and he’s just such a lovable guy imo. I hope they keep him around because I think he really adds something to the case.

Sorry for the mostly ranting post, but I just had to vent. Let me know if you feel the same!

[demvalhaken]

Disclaimer: Self Harm, S-icidal topics, Threats + me unintentionally being salty

Br00me goes by They/Them and has a big following on Tiktok and Gamejolt. They have two accounts on Tiktok, Br00m.e and Mushr00med_beauty.

Why am I coming out about this so suddenly? They cannot commit such heinous acts and go unnoticed.

I will be showing Discord screenshots, and tiktok screenshots.

READ: Yumiiii is also someone I know, they are also a friend of Br00me. Br00me’s will be shortened to Broom/Br

Dem: Me

I only have this screenshot because Broom had sent me a death threat but the server it was sent in had been deleted. The threat was basically “I have weapons in my garage, and will follow you home and kill you.” I am not joking, this seemingly harmless goober scared the shit out of me at the time. I feel like the threat hasn’t even been talked about, its like the worst thing they’ve done

The screenshot Yumi sent was basically just Broom saying “Fuck Dem”

FURTHER INFORMATION NOTE: This has also been confirmed

Yumi called Broom an “attention seeker.” There’s not much to say other than it probably has underlying motives. All I can say is “Why would you pretend to be drunk?”

FURTHER INFORMATION NOTE: This has also been confirmed

Guilt tripping. Broom has threatened both me and Yumi with self harm and s-icide. Keep Broom’s SH in mind as it will come up a lot. Why do I say guilt tripping? Because Broom has been known to use this to make someone feel guilty like Yumi

FURTHER INFORMATION NOTE: This has been confirmed by the big Broom themself.

Maybe guilt tripping? I was having words shoved down my throat. Even I know that me saying malicious things like that is completely crazy. Yeah sure, I’d call someone a bitch, but I wouldn’t say “You deserve to cut yourself”

It’s still a big “wtf” memory for me to this day

FURTHER INFORMATION NOTE: Apparently I actually did say that… uh… thanks Dem… FUCK MY BRAIN FOR MAKING ME BELIEVE I DIDNT SAY IT WHEN I DID, UGH SOMETIMES I WISH I HAD INFINITE MEMORY… Just know that the lying was unintentionally because my brain is blocking things from me and I can’t remember shit. Damn, I was butthurt back then, it hurts looking back at my old self, I was quite literally a tornado of insecurity, hatred, edginess, and hurt. That doesn’t justify anything cus like I was also a bad person back then, like forget everything, bitch, and just hate things for no reason bad.

I had basically told Broom that making your entire profile another person’s oc was wrong. The oc in question was Sky Heart’s black cat on youtube, a pretty big animator. Instead of doing anything else, I was promptly called a “dipshit” and told to fuck off

FURTHER INFORMATION NOTE: Uhhhhhh I don’t remember what I was gonna say here, just watch their recent apology cus yk

Let’s talk about Br00me’s TikTok as well

Br00m.e is their TikTok along with Mushr00med_beauty.

They have constantly used their self harm and issues as content, gaining massive amounts of sympathy from people. I understand posting like four videos talking about it but they have MORE THAN 11 videos talking about it.

FURTHER INFORMATION NOTE: My fingers hurt. Erm… Uh… Embarrassing! That’s just me being bitchy, but still what I was trying to say was there’s a point where the vent post get kinda overwhelming from the sheer amount. Apologies on my part, thank you past Dem for stirring the pot of drama with your salty hatred for someone, WHY TF- Nvm

Their content is mainly about their sans ocs and regretevator ocs

Broom is an offender of using the ai image to create a fursona

The AI image - Their fursona

It’s quite blatantly obvious. Shame on you.

FURTHER INFORMATION NOTE: Bleep blorp gleep glorp, WTF WAS THAT, anyways they were gonna make change to it, I was being a bitch here and I don’t know why. Damn this post is salty, past Dem was on some hate drug or somethin

Broom also on Gamejolt is no better. This includes the same as their TikTok. On both TikTok and Gamejolt, Broom had said that everyone cancelled on their birthday party and that they were going to kill theirselves. I am probably a part of that group as I couldn’t come due to inconveniences + I didn’t want to go

FURTHER INFORMATION NOTE: Idk why I interpreted the post like that but, uh, I was not apart of it… Well that’s embarrassing…

Broom also states their mental problems in their gamejolt description. Since they’ve been distrustful in my opinion, I would believe they’re doing it for attention purposes. They supposedly have ADD, BPD, and Autism? Broom is also a therian/fictionkin and has a third TikTok that goes by .Vintage48

FURTHER INFORMATION NOTE: Ugh, I was being a skeptical person, but yes, they do have diagnosed ADD. BPD and Autism are suspected.

But .vintage48 has been deleted/unable to be found

Broom also has another Gamejolt account that goes under the user SatanSavedMe. I have no hate against those who practice this type of religion. The account hasn’t been active since 2024/March 3rd

This is all I have to say but please don’t show any hate to Broom. I’m only coming out with this because it’s really been bothering me for a year and I can’t just stay quiet about. I do not mean any ill intentions with this post and I only wish we can learn from this onward.

This is a hard post, I know, but spread the word if you want to. I love you guys. You can comment if you want to

Edit: On Gamejolt, Broom posted a make me blush chart despite saying they’re asexual

When confronted with “They’re replies are false” Broom went ballistic. It shows that Alex also had a horrible way of dealing with criticism/accusations.

FUTURE INFORMATION NOTE: The post was from 2023 not 2024, Broom was not asexual at that time, I apologise as this was inquired by Purpsie. But this is also my fault for not checking the goddamn date as I was quite literally having a panic attack writing this post in its original state (Unedited version)

Edit 2: The server was deleted, thought I should mention that. Do not show hate to Alex guys, they made dumb decisions and are learning from their past mistakes. Their page has a response post and I suggest you read that before saying anything.

Edit 3: I’m too tired to change this post, I wrote this while I was tired last night and like idk what happened? Even though Alex isn’t their real name, never call them that, apologies. I knew the consequences of making this post and now I feel like an idiot, I will not be making any further drama as to not do something I will regret. Changes to the name have been made

Edit 4: What about the death threat I got sent? Are we just gonna ignore that you completely avoided anything about one of the main problems?

Edit 5: Do not talk to me, I’m eating every potato in the world with ranch

Edit 6: Might leave this in the past and start a new life. More art coming soon, I swear. I wish to be left alone. I didn’t expect for this to be taken to TikTok, the worst place to share stuff

Edit 7: Get help, and also fuck you kindly. YOU LITERALLY USE ALEX AS USERNAME 😭 I’m changing it back lol

Edit 8: Erm what the sigma? Shhhh I’m too tired to talk to you Br00me, I SAW THAT APOLOGY POST IF YOURE READING THIS NEW EDIT. So uh, yeah I was being salty cus I get bitchy sometimes, apologies for being a dick. I’m just hurt cus you know I literally don’t have any friends anymore yay. Ugh, I’m just like tired of this, I regret making this post but the damage is already fucking done. Also I might’ve lied on accident because my brain has blocked most of the memories out, and some of the stuff was said by my partner in crime, Purpsie. I will be making slight changes, If you need to message me Br00me, my alt tiktok is NotAnAnkleBiter, please and thank you.

[babacontainsmultitudes]

In Defense of the Other Teens

Hello besties :)

SO how about that last episode huh? I've certainly seen a lot of interesting takes and cool art and all that come from it!

And I'm... Here to offer my two cents.

Alright y'all, a few things before we actually get into the meat of it. First, this is a long post. Like, even by my standards this post is pretty fucking long. I hope that I'll be able to keep you entertained throughout at the very least, but maybe grab a cup of tea or coffee or the like before venturing under the cut.

Second, my stance on things will become pretty clear I think fairly early on, if you haven't already put two and two together from the title of this post. That said, there are some fairy bold claims I'm gonna make here, and the fact of the matter is some of them may very well be disproven as soon as today's Teen Talk drops. But I wanted to get this out beforehand, partially as a show of faith in a certain someone, and partially cause honestly I think it's good to practice giving oneself room to be wrong about things. That said, there are still many other points that I think remain important regardless of what we find out next episode (or in teen talk), and I hope you'll find those interesting as well.

Next, honestly, the first few chunks of this little essay really start out as more of a rant/vent than a tight analysis, and I kinda start things in a weird spot if I'm being frank with you, so maybe just try to bear with me for the first few parts, ok? They're still important for the bigger picture I'm trying to paint.

Finally, if I come off as a little extra salty and sassy in this one, I am, but I *promise* it's all in good fun. :)

Alright, so let me tell you my thoughts about Lincoln.

You know what I think? What I honestly, genuinely think? Linc is the most selfless of the teens by a long shot. Like, there's literally no competition. Enough "all he wants to do is help other people and all they ever do is betray him" with respect to Mr. TalkedGrantIntoAPanicAttackThenLeft and more appreciation and recognition for Lincoln Li SayHiToYourDadForMe Wilson, I'm begging you. I could sit here and start listing examples of Linc's selflessness to you for a good long while, but really no set of examples could better illustrate what differentiates Linc from the rest of the teens than this exchange:

**

Scary: "Chosen one…""

Jodie: "Bat’tholemew, we don't use those words." 

Scary: "Somebody they wouldn't expect."

Taylor: "It's me. It's got to be someone that they don't expect."

Scary: "Yeah." 

Taylor: "Yeah." 

Scary: "It's got to be somebody who's really earned—"

Taylor: "Somebody who’s really earned—" 

Scary: "—the respect."

Taylor: "—the right to... And all the knowledge of all the animes together…"

Scary: "Somebody with more knowledge than anybody else."

Taylor: "Someone with— who knows what to do. S… "

Scary: "Somebody who knows what to do to step up."

Taylor: "Somebody who can step up and be the chosen one."

Scary: "And be the chosen one."

Link: "Hey…"

Normal: "Guys, I think… I might be the chosen one…"

**

Yes, funnily enough, it's Linc's absence here that says a lot about him rather than his presence.

What's more, I frankly just don't think it's fair that Linc can do *so much* for the people around him but the *one time* he decides to do something that (seemingly) goes against Normal's plan, it's depicted as some ultimate act of betrayal or Linc "giving up". I feel like we significantly understate how much the other teens *have* done for the sake of Normal's plan (seriously, are we actually gonna ignore Linc stabbing his leg on a candy cane- TWICE??), and how much they've lost in doing so. If every time they fuck something up undoes everything they've sacrificed or done right, well, that's quite the negativity bias!

So why don't we talk about Linc's decision, actually. Did we just witness Lincoln finally snap? Has he given up on Normal's plan to help the doodler? Has he given up on using empathy? Did Lincoln Li Wilson choose the easy option? I would say no! No to all of those! And I think especially upon a relisten of the final moments in the last episode, Linc's train of thought when he breaks the pic is actually quite clear. And yes, this is about Linc showing empathy towards Scary, but I want to talk about the actual implications of that a bit further as well. Let's start by looking at the final bits of dialogue leading up to the breaking of anchor:

**

Linc: "Scary, what are you even doing?"

Scary: "You gotta destroy it"

Linc: "We can't- you just heard the Doodler's gonna make the world worse it's gonna kill we just gotta find something, why do you have to destroy it-"

Scary: "You don't know that!"

Linc: "I mean you don't know it's not that way we can find another way to destroy it"

Scary: "No, Willy said that it's easier to control if we destroy the anchors"

[ANTHONY EXPLAINS THE SPECIFICS OF WHAT WILLY WOULD HAVE TOLD SCARY]

Linc: "Well we're not gonna do it that way okay, come on like, the easy way is-"

Scary: "Who died and made you the leader?"

Linc: "The easy way is usually the bad way right? Sometimes the better thing is harder."

Scary: "This is easier what you're just gonna tell the pic 'Oh I love you I'm so nice to you' and it's just gonna give you all its secrets that's not how life works."

[LINK TRIES SAYING I LOVE YOU TO THE PIC AND NORM EXPLAINS THAT HE ALREADY TRIED THAT]

Linc: "Okay well like you're right it's gonna be hard but- I know it's not a person but I don't want more people to die we've already killed enough people like can you just do one thing with us and just try to find a way to make this-"

Scary: "The Doodler is gonna kill more people you're not seeing the bigger picture!"

Normal: "What no, Linc don't listen to her!"

Scary: "Listen to me!"

[AND THEN LINC SNAPS THE PIC]

**

Okay there's... A lot to unpack here. I'll start by pointing out what I think are a few key things to take note of:

- Linc is seemingly adamant on choosing the empathetic route and not letting any more people get hurt

- Linc affirms that sometimes the harder route is the better one

- Scary rejects the notion that simply saying "I love you" or otherwise being kind in words could actually do anything

- Norm says "don't listen to her"

- Linc's decision to break the pic only occurs after Scary says what she does (above point), seemingly in conflict with what he himself said only moments prior about not taking the violent route.

What I think needs to be understood about Linc is that, more than anyone in the group, Linc's decisions are calculated. Yes they often catch us off guard (seriously the amount of times Linc has done something that's made me actually gasp in shock is a bit crazy), but once the dust has settled, his decisions are always clearly consistent with who Linc is as a person and his philosophy, and accordingly, never come from a place of selfishness. The humor of it aside, when Linc says that he never misses any shot that he takes (:( Can't find the exact quote), he is entirely correct (and admittedly while I probably should gather various examples to show you what I mean, Linc swapping places with himself and Nicky really is the most perfect demonstration I could possibly ask for, as it showcases both Linc's aforementioned selflessness and how Linc's seemingly shocking decisions are never actually accidents or executed with uncertainty on his end). Try to keep these above points in mind as we move forward.

Next, let's consider the pros and cons for Linc of breaking or not breaking the pic, as seen from Linc's perspective. I suppose the general impression I've gotten thus far is that many people seem to be interpreting Linc breaking the pic as a likely (or sure) sign that he has "given up" on Normal's plan, and given in to choosing the "easier" route. This, I perhaps a bit boldly argue, raises a number of questions and ultimately implodes in on itself as an interpretation after even a brief consideration of them. At the most basic, and perhaps least interesting level, it's not like it would be that hard to search a little bit for some demonstration of love (especially with a certain pair of will-they-won't-they partners not too far away... Though I feel like the pic also could have been interesting as applied to some of the other characters around right now? Anyways...) You could say then, that maybe Linc simply doesn't care about using empathy, and has ultimately lost confidence in Norm's plan by this point, so he takes the path of absolute least resistance cause, well, whatever. But wait, didn't Linc *just* say that they weren't going to do things that way, and that he doesn't want more people to be killed? (You might say then that he thinks Scary has a point on "not seeing the bigger picture" and believes that choosing violence here will result in less deaths, but frankly I just don't think there's anything promising or compelling enough about Scary's argument here for Linc to have any real reason to believe it, all the more so given Willy’s involvement). Are we to think, then, that Linc changes his mind purely on a whim, and a whim influenced by Scary of all people no less? Frankly, I see this as a severe underestimation of Linc's strength of character, and this is where we really do need to consider the degree of calculation and confidence that goes into Linc's decision making and risk taking. What I'm saying is, Linc simply doesn't fall victim to selfish impulses that way (and within the group this is a quality unique to him!). Moreover, even if Linc might have his doubts in Norm and his plan, he still has significantly more reason to go with that than to listen to Scary. Seriously, Linc has every reason to not listen to Scary here. When it comes to what Linc cares about the most, Scary has without a doubt harmed Linc more than the Doodler ever could (The significance of Tony Pepperoni being stabbed in Linc's home in front of his dad  c a n n o t  be forgotten or understated!!!). Even if Linc didn't care at all about showing empathy to the Doodler, if he were acting purely out of selfishness he would still have more reason to do so if only because it means not giving the satisfaction to or otherwise helping Scary (and Willy).

But Scary is confused, and Scary is lonely, and from her perspective she probably does feel betrayed. We (and Linc) are given some important information regarding Scary in this episode. Firstly, we get a glimpse into how Willy has twisted things and convinced her that violence is the better option (not because it's easier per se, but because more people will apparently be saved in the long run). Second, Linc finally understands what Scary needs... Or at least what she doesn't need. Specifically, he understands that simply saying "I love you" isn't enough. He understands that Scary will never believe it no matter how many times it is said, and that to really prove to Scary that she is loved and get through to her, he needs to show her, has to prove to her that, despite everything, he is still on her side.

Linc, I dare argue more than any of the teens, has so much reason to leave Scary behind. But he understands her now, and, against Normal's wishes, listens to her. In a weird way (if I'm not dead wrong about this whole empathy thing), this kind of is Linc's "throne of the doodler" equivalent. It would be so easy to not break the pic, to not choose to (help and) empathize with Scary after all the pain she has caused him, but that's not the kind of person Linc is, and I hope the points I raised earlier make that reasonably clear.

So no, I don't think Linc chose the easy option. I think he believes himself when he says that sometimes the harder route is the better one, and followed through on this when he took his shot.

Sincerely, if you think the Doodler is just a scared teen deserving of empathy and sacrifice and making tough decisions, but Scary isn't, then I think you've missed the point. The Doodler is just acting out and needs help, but when Scary or Linc break an anchor through violence (be it violently empathetic or not), we give up on them? We hope for Normal to abandon them when they're hurting and depict it as deserved or even righteous? I can't get behind that, I'm sorry. 

Furthermore, whereas Norm would certainly be justified in feeling concerned for the Doodler's sake if Linc's actions count as an act of violence, apart from that like, if Norm chooses to interpret Linc reaching out and showing support to someone as lost and alone and in need of help as Scary as a personal attack against him, either as a betrayal of their friendship (Norm is very jealousy-prone we’ve known this from the start!) or as a direct attack against Norm's perfect little violence-free narrative that lets him be the hero regardless of who gets left behind wait does he actually just hate Hero cause of her name hm, then that is, respectfully, completely a problem with him, and not with Linc. I think if Normal actually snaps from this, then his entire philosophy of choosing empathy is based on a lie, and Norm just wants to follow the narrative that allows him to be the hero on paper, so that everybody finally loves him.

Well that's a bit harsh huh. Believe it or not, I'm genuinely not trying to throw Norm under the bus here. But... I am trying to expose his flaws and shortcomings in relation to the other teens. This is important moving forward, because in refusing to seriously acknowledge the fact that Norm, while still having plenty of good in his heart, is someone who can be quite self-centered, and ultimately cares about being well-perceived and loved first and foremost, we become blind to the ways in which Norm, like Scary, is vulnerable to future instances of manipulation. That bit on appearance vs. true compassion isn't mere interpretation, by the way, Will has stated this quite clearly in episode 27 of teen talk (and in general I'd really rather not rely on that kind of bonus content in these sorts of posts but, well, it's hard to ignore this):

**

Will: (In reference to Norm's scene in the pride layer) "I feel like I understand Normal better now, like a kind of darker side of his psyche that's different from Henry... Like Henry's very concerned with being a good person but I don't think is super concerned with whether people like him or not, whereas Normal is like a little concerned with being a good person but *mostly* concerned- it's two different ways to solve love [he explains what it implies for Henry], the other is 'if everyone else likes me, that means I can take that in as well'."

**

I need to stress that I am not trying to imply that Norm is anywhere close to being a bad person, btw. Normal, like everybody else, has his flaws, but has proven that he has plenty of good qualities as well. What I *am* trying to imply is that Norm does have a tendency to put himself at the center of things, and is from a more meta standpoint benefiting from a narrative that puts him at the center of things (more or less guaranteeing that he will be seen as a hero of sorts no matter what- evident even in how fandom largely depicts him vs the other teens), and I'm just saying that if ever he found himself in Oakvale by some chance he might really appreciate the enforced anti-violence initiative put in place by the town's noble leader who really just gets him and praises him and-

I know (almost) nobody wants to hear this, but if Normal actually had a villain arc, it would most likely consist of him falling down the same path that Barry did. Barry was a hero, on paper. And the people around him certainly saw him as such, and loved and accepted him in some sense of the word, which is what he truly wanted at the end of the day. And he got rid of all the violence!!! 

But none of that makes Barry a good person.

*sniff sniff*

Hey... Has anyone else noticed the distinct lack of stinky weebs in this post?

As much as I myself am a bit more interested in the Linc side of things right now, I do need to talk a bit (or a lot) about Taylor too. My little guy! You haven't even had a proper, serious character arc yet and people have already decided that you don't have a shot vis a vis the upcoming anchors, despite easily being the most emotionally resilient and stable of the group. You know what, I'm gonna throw in most loyal too. If you'll humor me...

Taylor may not be the most empathetic of the teens (in fact, he may very well be the least), but this doesn't mean he doesn't care, and doesn't mean he isn't kind in his own way. What's particular about Taylor's brand of loyalty compared to the other teens that I think might make it a bit easy to overlook is that it while it is very strong, it tends to be reserved only for the people he chooses to call his friends (oh, and his mom!). There's no question of Taylor's choice to disregard what Nick tells him and go back to save Linc from the FBI, it embodies some of the most fundamental parts of who Taylor is as a person. Which I guess is to say that, there are ultimately only so many people Taylor chooses to have in his circle, but those bonds are extremely important to him, and he really is ride or die about them. I think that this aspect is most obvious when looking either at Taylor's relationship with Linc or Cassandra, but also with Hermie actually! Oh, and similar to the example with the FBI, Taylor's response to the whole Tony situation is perfectly consistent with this aspect of his character as well. Tony was not part of Taylor's circle, not someone he chose to let himself get attached to (because when Taylor gets attached to someone, it is indeed a very deliberate choice), so no, he's not gonna care that much about Tony's death. But he is bothered by Scary's betrayal. He is bothered because, even if they weren't the closest, Scary was, I would argue, still part of Taylor's circle. And yes, he is bothered by Linc leaving him alone in the last episode for the same reason, except that in this case it's probably worse actually. I know I'm straying pretty far from the original topic here, but still I think it's worth exploring the interesting position this puts Taylor in going forward, especially with respect to Nick. 

("Seriously baba when did this become about Nicky literally what are you talking about right now?")

Thus far, Taylor has made it very clear that no, he is not going to allow Nick to be someone he becomes attached to. There's a risk, in loving and becoming loyal to someone as strongly as Taylor does, and Nicky has not yet proven himself to be a risk worth taking. So what happens next? Nicky is (finally) around after all, so what might the future hold for little Taylor? On the one hand, Nicky's "words of advice" might begin to get through to Taylor, which could leave him in a pretty dangerous position. Taylor takes a big risk every time he lets someone in (everyone does but Taylor more than all the others because of how fully he loves and trusts and protects, is what I'm saying- er... He's a lot like his dad that way actually!), so what if Nick convinces him that nobody is worth that risk, and that everyone you hold dear will ultimately betray you? Well, I think we'd be left with a very lonely Taylor! Conversely, what if Nicky decides to prove himself worthy of Taylor's love? What if Taylor comes around and lets him in? ahaha shit I feel like there's a bad joke to be made about Taylor keeping his dad at arms length and his dad not having any arms right now god fucking damn it what even is this post. Will Nicky be able to maintain that trust? If he abandoned Taylor again, after Taylor has allowed himself to become attached (or if something happens to Nicky cause lets face it horrible things tend to happen to Nicky), I think Taylor might finally have a hard time getting back up.

What the fuck was I talking about? Oh yeah, so I guess going back to Norm, on the one hand, I guess on the more extreme end Taylor could actually take Linc's actions very hard, in which case I actually could see him sticking with Norm as an act of self-preservation. That said, I don't personally feel that this will be the case, that Linc is still ultimately in Taylor's circle, and accordingly Taylor's loyalty towards Linc will persist, albeit perhaps with a seed of doubt sewn at the back of his mind. And I don't think in that case that it's fair to frame this as Taylor betraying Normal? As others have pointed out, Norm frankly just hasn't really earned much in the way of Taylor's friendship. Really, as far as I'm concerned, Taylor doesn't really owe Norm much of anything at all. From the very beginning Norm has made it clear that he doesn't particularly care for Taylor, and ultimately has let his own jealousy and desire for attention (especially Linc and Hermie's attention) get in the way of ever really getting to know or appreciate Taylor beyond the surface level. Would I call it betrayal for Taylor to choose to continue to support his best friend instead of the guy who told him that anime isn't real? No, and I think the double standard is pretty obvious if we consider the reverse. That is, if Taylor chose Norm over Linc, after everything he and Linc have been through, would we be framing Linc as the victim of some grand betrayal? I genuinely don't think we would, at least not to the extent that we would with Norm. I suppose I'm saying all this, because well as aforementioned I just find there's been a lot of undeserved cynicism towards Taylor, and I think a lot of it does genuinely come from Normal's privileged position within the narrative as its de facto "hero" and what is most convenient for maintaining that image (and when I say "hero", that does include "righteous villains" who "deserve(d) to snap", just so we're clear on that).

Hmmmm I kinda wanna talk about Taylor and Normal as each other's foils but this post is getting a bit long isn't it... *Sigh* Not today, no, not today.

......Okay but still I have to say that if Taylor actually does finally get his "main character moment" I actually think that would be a great opportunity for Norm to acknowledge, reconcile, and learn to cope both with his jealousy and the parts of himself that are self-centered. Conversely, if Taylor does for one reason or another stray a bit too far into the habit of keeping people at arm's length out of fear of abandonment, betrayal, or the like, I think he could learn something from Norm too (having trouble phrasing exactly what I mean here, so perhaps I'll save the full notion for another time!)

So that's... Yeah, I think that's the most important stuff. I debated on sort of elaborating on examples of Norm's major character flaws, but despite everything my intent here was first and foremost to offer a "defense of the other teens" more than anything else. Though I will say that I think there is something to be said about how Normal's self-centeredness gets in the way of his ability to actually help those around him (Grant and Taylor both being great examples in "The Staircase"), how this contrasts with Linc's willingness to actually listen to and figure out what Scary needs in this most recent episode, and accordingly what Normal could potentially learn from Linc about not just choosing the route that's easiest for you.

[cerealandchoccymilk]

Trigun Bookclub: Trigun Vol.1, Chapter #05

previous | all | next

CW: Some of my analysis in this post handles the topic of death and suicide (there will be a warning around that portion). There are also more spoilers than usual. Stay safe!

I’m doing a deep-read of the Japanese original print (reread) and Overhaul 1.0 (first read) side-by-side, and writing down everything I notice from small details, version differences, translation differences, etc.

As always, here are the silly silly non-analysis panels:

And the rest is under the cut >:)

[link for if the images aren’t in horizontal rows]

Milly and Meryl (especially Milly goddamn) rolling nat 20's on their perception checks. It really is scary how good their sixth sense is.

In the previous chapter, Vash asked for (and for a while was using) a 3rd class seat, but it looks like he asked for a grade-up or something to accomodate for Kaito.

A sort-of mistranslation - Kaito means that Vash talks as if he were someone from the Big Fall (because in that time period, there's no way any human from then would be alive), so it should be more like "You talk as if you were actually at the Big Fall, over a hundred years ago." The existing phrasing could also mean that, but this would make it less ambiguous. Also, I would replace his "I/my" statements with "we/our," since it's not specified and he assumes Vash is just a human that's talking weirdly.

This line is really interesting to me from a rereading standpoint. At this point, Vash's origins and age are still a mystery, and this is the first hint at it. Vash's expression makes me think that maybe he was reminded that no one other than him (+Knives+the people at the Home ship) is from that time period. To the overwhelming majority of people, No Man's Land is their only home; this life is all they know.

Don't have much to say about this one that's not in the image. Vash's pussy is out again. Excellent (horrible) form. Kaito is either a bit worried about how hard he fell, or he doesn't give a shit and is just nervous/cautious about the mission.

I love how over-the-top neon is. Smoking a firework!! Damn!!

A decent amount of lines from Neon and the BL gang (I'm going to call them that exclusively) are in katakana English.

I like how he says "maggots" in place of the...rude 3rd person pronoun (??)(that sounds kinda stupid in english lmao) Neon says something more like "It's about time that boy set everything up!!" referring to the small bombs he was putting in the vents.

His pose here reminds me of kabuki. I'm not sure about details, since I don't know much about kabuki... But it looks like a stereotypical kabuki pose. Another over-the-top point for Neon.

In Japanese, the first line has "reeking of manure" describing the wagons. For the "Big Man" in Japanese, the kanji for the sandsteamer (砂蒸気, usually ruby-ed サンドスチーム/sandsteamer) with the ruby note saying Big Man (ビッグ・マン). Also, the guy mentions that the chasing them off is part of the fee they paid.

More over-the-top-ness from Neon. In the Japanese version, the first line looks a lot like one of those super long German words to me lol (究極華麗弩級盗賊). The portion saying "The Bad Lads Gang!" in Japanese is pretty much just "Hhhhhheaaaddd!!!!" (as in leader).

The introduction for Neon actually has play on words/kanji. The word 降臨 (kōrin) is originally for Christ's coming or descent, usually used for any arrival of someone "godly" (fyi Japanese has a much more casual sense of godliness than in English). What it says here, though, is 光臨, which replaces the first hald with the character for "light" (also kō). How bright can this guy get!?

Did Kaito nicely go through the trouble of moving Vash onto the bed before venting? how... that's a grown man...

And here is Rem's first appearance!! Just now realized that her name is probably based off of REM sleep (the stage of sleep associated with dreaming). The two are wearing similar (but not the same) clothes, with Rem wearing a tucked t-shirt and jeans, and Vash wearing an untucked button-up and jeans. I'm not smart enough for this but there's gotta be something to analyze here along with the fact that Vash is an adult (the dream isn't entirely based on memory)... Also, this is the first time we see Vash in a casual outfit.

This may very well be me reading into things too much, but it stuck out to me that Rem is barefoot while Vash has sneakers on. I had two speculations about this. One is that Rem has been at that picnic for longer than Vash, and Vash just got (appeared...?) there. I'm not sure about Western picnic customs/etiquette, but in Japan, you always take your shoes off when sitting down on the tarp. Rem is the one that set the picnic up, but Vash hasn't had the chance to even take his shoes off. this sounds kinda stupid now that im typing it out. idek (throws computer out of window) [death/sui cw] The other, more messed up one is that it symbolizes Rem's death. This one is definitely more overanalysis-y!! It reminded me of what Reigen did during the final arc of MP100...iykyk. During the Great Fall, Rem willingly stayed on the ship to save humanity, sacrificing herself. I'll spare the details, but in Japanese culture, people often take their shoes off before committing suicide. It's a frequently used symbol in art that handles the topic. Rem being barefoot may be symbolizing her resolve at the time of her death, of being prepared to die if it means she can save one more person. [/cw]

did i write all that for a single panel. this aut really be isming OH MY GOD MY COMPUTER JUST RAN OUT OF BATTERY I HAD A HEART ATTACK. I FORGOT IT WASNT PLUGGED IN HOLY SHIT THANK GOD FOR AUTOSAVE.

This line of Vash's is also interesting. Is he viewing "people" from an outsider's perspective, as an independent Plant? Or is including himself in that, questioning the meaning of his own current life in the desert planet, too?

In Japanese. way he responded to Rem's giggling looked a bit childish to me, like he reverted a bit back to his childhood, or he's just being a more relaxed around Rem. mom........

Ok okokok. In Japanese, she (more literally) says "All I can muster/the best I can do is ask my heart [the destination] (read: what I can do)." This may be a translation correction but I honestly was not thinking about that at all during the annotation lol. I'm too sleepy to actually talk about the importance of this line and the way it's phrased. but you get it. you get it.........

Silly Vash face for the first time in a while!! Vash's reaction upon waking gives me the impression that this is the first time (in a long while, at least) that he's dreamed about Rem...? he looks so cute..........................help...................

And that’s it for Chapter #05! As always, the Japanese annotations are in the reblogs.

i know i'm getting very behind. theres absolutely no way im going to complete all this in real time with the book club. and all this stuff about rem is not helping. send help

[ernestelm]

Black Cat Detective movie rant

Ever since I made that video about black cat detective I've realised how much I despised the movie. It missed the mark so badly that after I vented I felt like I had more things that I hated about t.

 Im not going to urge people to watch the video because I am cringing at it but I also want people to find it and maybe have more people be interested in black cat detective.

I'm going to be honest, that video made me never want to make a video again.  Im just going to be mostly text based, I might start posting animations or something some day but don't expect too much from me.

Useless rants away, Im going to get to the point.

Im starting from the beginning since Im kinda hoping no one reading this watched the video. Bcd is widely considered a classic by Chinese people created in the 80's. I didnt grow up with it, I was more interested in western shows , but I did see people from 2000's which is my age range say that they did. To me this was kind of a red flag, you see, liking western shows means my norm is watching the newest rendition for a series. For example, I watched tmnt 2012, I didnt grow up with the 80's one. So colour me surprise when I started trying Chinese media and they had so little good kids shows that after the 2000's they were still referencing shows from the 80's.

By that point I've already started watching more kids shows, I just didn't want to sit through anime and tvs shows and feel drained in the end anymore. So it was definitely a surprise when the main character started absolutely obliterating the villains. It also showed the more dark side of nature, like praying mantis eating their mate so their offsprings can have more nutrition. The whole show as a concept was kinda cool, my only gripe was that they didn't kill off the main villains despite killing smaller villains you know, typical hero movie tropes.

In 2015 they created a movie, which was where it all went downhill. (It might also be the series's season 2 but I couldnt bring myself to watch it so Im not counting it) They movie was loved by a lot of adults because they toned down the violence. Whatever, its fine, a show didnt have violence as long as they have good plot.

The movie didnt have good plot.

Characters

The characters, weren't good. First off, I didnt like how they added thick eyebrows for bcd and like he still barely had any expressions.

the whole thing about animation is that you can distort facial expressions, surpass what humans cannot do in real life, even the original series had bcd puff up from anger.

Im going to do another section just based on animation later

Other than that they added gag characters like a goddamn duck that keeps coming in with underwears on. It was so goddamn annoying, they even repeated it several times as if taunting me. I find it to be a problem with chinese cartoons in how they dumb down humour for children despite China supposedly being smart. I might bring this up for another rant on a show that I might do in the future but you'll understand what Im saying if you watched any chinese children show in recent years.

They also brought back the iconic villain, one ear, who is both unlikable and barely entertaining, his voice was annoying, I never liked it when he was on screen, he was mostly useless either way.

They also brought in a new "one off villain"  a gorilla who's story sorta had potential. He basically got pissed at a friend over a misunderstanding, thinking that his friend was selfish trying take the credit of both of their work despite his friend mostly using "us" and "we", while the people back at base used "you found it". It could've been a pretty good lesson on miscommunication. Other than that, he also started thinking he should take all of the credit, a good lesson on how jealousy can blind a person. Everything was in place and yet they still messed up. I liked how even after seeing his friend apologise to him through a hologram he still couldnt forgive him. He wasn't like the best villain but he was certainly a step in the right direction.

Alright now for the main character, yup that's right, bcd wasnt the main character. It was a pig kid. With a hedgehog for a mother, which is a goddamn pun that can only be translated in Chinese. 豪猪 hedgehog and  猪 pig. Weird design choice aside. The goddamn kid is the most annoying little shit I've ever seen.

Alright Im going to start with the positives, the kid could be a good example on stress on children, which is also a theme for another pig related kids show that I hate, might talk about it someday but I didnt like the show so I'm probably going to take a while. He goes to tuition every single day, his mom honestly kinds of neglects his interest to be a policeman. Only allowing one poster of bcd in his bedroom, giving him tons of homework in one scene, it would've been a good chance to show the stress he is in, already having so much pressure to succeed in life despite only being in primary school. Instead, the show decides to play it off as a gag, haha relatable, dont you think this is funny? As someone who grew up in a competitive Chinese school, I would say no. Story for another day tldr, it ruins your mental health and your relationships if you're not careful.

Now for the negatives, the kid is annoying. Well immature traits are annoying to me, so I might be biased. First off, the kid keeps trying to save the day despite it being wildy out of his capabilities. Exhibit A, trying going against 2 adults, one being a prisoner who escaped from a high security prison. He was lucky that his idol, bcd arrived in time to save him. Bcd even told him that he shouldve contacted him instead of facing 2 dangerous adults alone. And yet the kid kept going in and save bcd, being a kids movie they of course want everything to go well but his presence did cause the two villains to escape containment at one point. His presence did cause bcd to have to hand over a dangerous item as he was held hostage, why? He decided that instead of calling bcd to warn him about his battery being stolen and probably being used to escape, he goes on his scooter to warn him. Mind you, this show has phones, they had a gag were a girl liked bcd and asked for his number, which he replied with China's emergency number so contacting him via phone was an option. In the end everything works out, he was even rewarded for being reckless, now assuming this show was targeted at kids ( based on the juvenile jokes ), what message would this send to the children watching? It certainly isnt a good one now is it.

He also doesnt freaking tell bcd about the plan of the villains instead kept telling him how much he likes him and shit and waiting until he gets asked before splurging out the information. He also made the high stakes feel so much weaker as people's lives were at stake when he was freaking stanning and crap.

There's also his friend who was only introduced to give the kid a vip ticket so he can be at the scene when the 2 villains arrived there despite it not being opening day yet. His friend is absolutely underutilized, his father is the curator of the green star which was the place, and the weapon that the villains used, yeah the event was held on a spaceship, which the villains were planning launch to space as some sort of sick revenge. High stakes that were absolutely underplayed by the protagonists but I digress.

He never went to check on his friend who, as stated was in the location of a crime. He was supposed to be the "best friend" and yet he never contacted his friend after the incident. I cant even entirely blame it on him as after the main character met his idol and "helped" him, he never contacted this friend to tell him about everything or something. Which made their friendship even less natural and making the fact that he was merely a plot device even more obvious.

Plot

After seeing how his friend was treated you already know the writing of this is going to be a treat right? I expected so much from China, who force their kids to memorize Chinese classics and read so much literature, you would think that the place that supposedly invented paper would have better writing but no, its absolutely garbage if you cant tell from my sarcasm in my first sentence.

Now now, Im going to start with the obvious, any writer or like writing enthusiast would know about the quote "show dont tell". Yeah, tell that to the writer of Mr Black: Green Star. Sorry I didnt being up the name of the movie sooner but, I dont like the name at all and was procrastinating on even typing out the words. They continuously repeated this elite group of policemen (yes, from what I can tell they were all male) yet never showed them, I had to go on 知乎 to even find any information about it. Even so, I wasnt even sure if it was official.

Other than that there was this plotline where bcd won his first award at 14 for defeating professor strange (generic ass villain, dr strange wannabe, can you tell how much I hate this movie?) look as much as it messes up the timeline, I might excuse him as maybe being younger in the original series causing him to be more violent. Like maybe he got more responsible causing a more child friendly new gen bcd but that's expecting too much from the writers.

I really, really wished that they started with a movie of him joining the elite team and defeating professor strange or something instead of whatever this is. It would've established his character. Maybe starting with a more feral and hostile bcd, maybe even mourning for his friend who died in the original series and wanting to kill the villains but being told killing is not the solution. It would've been a new chapter, it would've saved a few seconds of my life from listening to characters repeating the same thing, that could've just been in a movie.

Moving on, we have logic. There is barely any. Oh Ern! Stop being such a soggy cereal, can't you just enjoy a movie without debating the logic? No, not when they both cause stupid behaviour and ignore a goddamn chance to be educational which links it to the edu part of the original series. First off stupid behaviour, the kid drives a jet because his dad is a pilot, thats not how it works, I bet the writers thought they were smart like, chekovs gun moment! Remember how the friend made an offhand remark on how the main character's dad is a pilot? Well yes I do. But also I don't drive a boat because my dad is a fisherman because it doesnt work like that.

Other than that g force. Gravity altering device, whatever, I could care less but bcd withstanding 8 g force without equipment? Real shit. They couldve said something about how cats can handle higher g forces or something. Whatever , theres thankfully not much information about that but one thing I am sure of is, the goddamn jet the kid was driving also had g force. Why wasnt that brought up. Why cant the kid handle the device but could handle a jet? They could've thought the kid about g force and make him experience it himself. Maybe do a flashback on it when he was on the jet. It would've been an upgrade to bcd teaching him how to shoot and making the final scene about him  never being able to aim well but dealing the final blow perfectly. The shooting part could've been more talent or something honestly, I dont care much of it.

Enough of the g force. Talk more about plot. What else is there to say? This whole thing is just a shallow movie, what am I gonna talk about, the one lff minion who was basically just there to fill in the chase scene? There is barely any substance in this movie, it felt more like a cash grab but like itt can't even sell merch because the character designs were mid and most of them are unlikable other than bcd but that's just my opinion.

Animation

Shit was weak, as I said they never utilised the fact that they used 2D animation. The animation techniques used felt more 3D than 2D.their smear frames are just a white blur. Their expressions are boring. and the side characters looks like this

Ive seen passion projects on youtube with better quality screenshots than these. I would rather it have self inserts of animators. Heck I've seen better quality animation in Bilibili productions. LOOK AT TGCF, HECK, LOOK AT WHITE CAT LEGEND. Those aren't even national culture icons, they weren't even released in theatres and yet look at the quality.

The worst part? They used 2D animation to honour the original series. It didn't feel like honour at all, in fact, it felt like an insult. I feels like the people who watched it only watched the series a few times as a kid and didn't even rewatch it to write the new show.

Anyways, I hope I never think about this movie ever again.

[pudgy-planets]

This doesn’t feel like a vent post as it is…

I feel like I’m wasting my life.

Yeah, I’m only 20 and I at least have 40 or so years before my body starts saying "health issues HOOHAAHAA."

I went off to school in August of last year. And yeah i did a lot. I saw a lot, it was truly my first time on my own, and it taught the importance of independence. But… I rarely attended events, I didn’t go out much, and my roomie was almost always doing something while I just stuck around in my room in my bed or in my chair doing schoolwork.

This summer and the last few I’ve rarely done anything. I’ve stayed in my room, slept, maybe did some gaming, and rinse and repeat. Everyone’s usually got friends they’re hanging out with, going out to planned stuff, making their own content and producing their own audiences.

And then there’s me. A 20 year old, black trans woman who has difficulty functioning. I’m scared of people and I’m just afraid of being myself because of ridicule. Especially my mom who filled my head with "People are going to laugh at you for doing this" or "I did my best to change the world around you, so you wouldn’t have to feel like you couldn’t be yourself."

I fear dedicated myself to stuff and even starting new things. I have comics, books, video games, I’ve had for months, years even. I got Splatoon 3 in December of 2022. I have never even opened the game on my switch.

Typically I’m the one in my friend group to plan something or ask if people wanna do things. I rarely if ever get invited out to stuff. And while I’m sure I’m not only the human being who feels like this, it just… sucks. And I don’t know what to do about it.

Even getting therapy is a travesty here because it usually falls along the line of "Well… it’s kind of your fault and you should go get a job, because it’ll make you feel better." or "Alright, you’ve trauma dumped enough for one day… I’ll see you in, what 2-3 months? Bye now!"

I can even think in high school where people always joined clubs, or they were always doing something and being involved. And for the life of me, i couldn’t replicate those feelings. Especially in my last two years of high school. I just wanted it to be over and I did not want to contribute any more time than necessary to a place I hated being in.

This may be just an instance of me worrying and overthinking, but… I’m usually always alone with my own mind as my only company and then he likes to call me bad things all the time.

Some people who are younger than me seem to have it figured out, they may not necessarily do, but it feels like that. Which makes me think… Why are we even here?

Gift of life is a beautiful thing, but in a world where individuality and distinctiveness are squashed like cockroaches beneath the boot of a corrupt, crooked, and frankly apathetic regime…

What is. The point? Do we define our own point? Is it just working our behinds off our entire life with the hope of there being some reward or contentment at the end?

People my age are already in debt from banks due to taking out loans for schooling, for jobs they may not even see for within 5-10 years of getting their degrees in the first place.

There are Harvard graduates who are living paycheck to paycheck for medical degrees. Which are not only hard, but they usually pay well.

Which makes me question "Why am I doing Astrophysics." I’m doing it because I’m more passionate about this than any other field. Maybe history and philosophy, but I wanna do this with my miserable life because that’s what I desire.

But is it even worth it? I personally think it’s worth for myself…. But does that truly mean I’ve used my scholarship and grant money well?

I could switch to say engineering, med school, architecture, finance, or even advertising and I’d probably see more money out of all of them than say a doctorate in studying astronomical phenomena.

I don’t even know why I’m talking about ANY of this. Feels like I’m having a mid-life, existential crisis in my 20’s as opposed to in 40’s or early 50’s. I feel like I should still be enjoying my relatively youthful adult years, but I can’t not think of the future. Heck I don’t even sound reasonably articulate here I’m rambling complete and other nonsense, and I’m 100% wrong since I usually am about these things.

I don’t know. That. Sums a lot of how I feel. I don’t know. And I don’t like that.

[sophieinwonderland]

Do We Really Have To Do This Again?

Okay, guess we have to. 😔

And no. Someone else might block these. Personally, I prefer to respond with debunking posts that are sent to the anti-endo tags, because if anti-endos are going to purposefully invade our tags to attack endogenic systems, anti-endos are sure going to see the responses.

Now, to your concerns...

Most of this seems to be a vent about a bad therapist not taking obvious signs of DID seriously. And then trying to ascribe blame to the endogenic community for this somehow.

And this is... really weird. @the-chaos-crew doesn't seem to actually know what they're complaining about.

The vast majority of endogenic systems aren't "trying to be debilitated." Most don't claim to have any sort of dissociative disorder nor are they seeking treatment for it.

Frankly, it seems like you're confusing "endogenic systems" with "imitated DID." The latter being a largely fictitious or over-exaggerated group of alleged DID fakers. I've debunked this concept in the past:

If you notice, the people these papers use as an example often say they were traumatized, and talk about that trauma. Especially in the group they decide is just BPD.

And if you pay attention to a lot of the TikTok DID systems people love to fakeclaim, these too generally mention childhood trauma. Most are actually anti-endos, funny enough.

Endogenic systems are a group that's usually non-disordered and by definition, not traumagenic.

So-called imitated-DID cases, where much of the fakeclaiming originates, generally ARE traumagenic by their own reports, and obviously disordered.

These are two largely different demographics.

That's not to say you should get mad at the so-called Imitated DID systems either. The very concept of Imitated DID was mostly driven by ableism, politics at the time, and trying to protect therapists from malpractice lawsuits.

There's No Indication DID is Less Likely To Be Diagnosed Today

In the 90s, DID was renamed, a ton of psychiatrists decided it must be a fad, "Imitated DID" theory caught on to explain away false positives. Fewer people were diagnosed for a while.

To my knowledge, there's been no evidence DID has been diagnosed less since the term endogenic was coined in the late 2010s, or that endogenic systems have any impact that would prevent people from being diagnosed.

Sometimes a bad therapist is just a bad therapist.

Well if your therapist who tells you not worry about your memory gaps and blackouts says something, it MUST be true! /s

Meanwhile, here is what the creators of the Theory of Structural Dissociation have said:

And here is what the ICD-11, the diagnostic manual compiled by the World Health Organization, says about being able to have multiple distinct personality states without a dissociative disorder.

Again... maybe you just have a bad therapist.

But you already knew that, didn't you?

Just Going Total r/fakedisordercringe

TLDR; "I know some people with these disorders, therefore I know how EVERYONE with these disorders behaves."

Putting aside the fakeclaiming of systems in the rest of the post, this is also a terrible way to treat mental illnesses. People with mental disorders are not a monolith. While there may be some who mis-self-diagnose, simply knowing someone with a mental illness doesn't give you magic insight into everyone with that illness.

What's more, not everyone will expose their debilitating symptoms for you to know they're really disordered. Some people have learned to adapt or to hide. And especially if you're on the internet, you may only be interested in sharing the positive experiences.

You don't know how someone struggles offline or in their personal lives, so stop pretending you do.

Seeking Therapy For Non-Disorders

Do you understand how that would be counterproductive to the whole premise of this post?

You're supposedly upset about endogenic system stealing resources from systems. How would non-disordered systems seeking therapy for being systems do anything but exacerbate the problem you think exists?

Here's the thing... normally, I wouldn't care if you want to vent. Even if that vent is contradictory and nonsensical as this was. Clearly, you're in a lot of pain right now.

But you made a conscious choice to go into endo safe tags to intentionally hurt other people. And that's not acceptable.

So I'm going to ask the anti-endo community to explain to @the-chaos-crew why we don't crosstag. That way, I don't have to keep coming into their spaces every single time anti-endos break containment and come into ours to spread hate against us.

Stay out of our tags, and I'll stay out of yours.

[shirogane-oushirou]

[cw mentions of ableism. talking / venting about the sharing vs non-sharing shit (i do not lean towards supporting one "side" over the other); starts out relatively neutral-toned but i start to sound frustrated part way through. i also have a more personal ramble at the very end that has a separate cw list. it's also long... don't feel obligated to read. i just needed to say things and be Done with it.]

man. i'm ready for all of the sharing vs non-sharing back and forths to stop.

to be clear: this isn't some "i'm above this argument" thing. on the contrary; i completely see where both "sides" are coming from! i simply mean it shouldn't be so difficult for a select few shit-stirrers to Get that selfshipping is a personal thing, and we should be able to ship in whatever way makes us most comfortable.

if someone is non-sharing, they should be allowed to create those boundaries without being harassed or called "immature" or "delusional" by sharing people. beyond how supremely ableist that is, nobody has the right to say they can't view their f/os in a certain way, no matter if other people don't understand those feelings.

if someone is sharing, they should be allowed to share their feelings for a character openly with other sharing people without being sent hate from non-sharing people who think they're "loose" or who want to be their f/o's "one and only". shaming people for being open to sharing is fucked from multiple "sexual / romantic purity" and "anti poly-[sexual / romantic / platonic] relationships" angles, and nobody has the right to claim sole and total ownership over a character they did not make.

and yet, every couple of weeks, we get posts from a vocal minority making a huge fuss over "the other side", when it's just a vocal minority FROM that other side ALSO making a fuss. and then those vague posts leave their intended orbit and cause more mis-worded posts and misunderstandings and off-the-cuff bigoted statements, and the cycle starts again.

we should theoretically be able to respect each other while focusing that energy on, oh i dunno, chasing harassers out of the community? getting selfshippers who aren't part of a specific marginalized group to help selfshippers from that group when they're harassed, maybe?? especially when the sharing vs non-sharing Thing very often coincides with bigotry; people who are harassing others tend to not just stop at being petty or mean, they make it personal.

and -- not as important but a nice little bonus -- i would think that working towards a community that's more safe for everyone in it would also "coincidentally" (/s) get rid of the shit-stirrers, whether because they were kicked out or because they realized what they were doing and grew as people.

---

[cw ableism, vague death ideation, non-physical self harm mention]

i was originally gonna put this bit in the tags, but i think i should put it under the cut bc it's a little personal + it got too long.

also, i try to stay in my lane and not discuss details about delusions or how to approach them -- i've only experienced them a couple of times, so i'm not going to claim to know much about them -- so if i've overstepped, PLEASE let me know and i'll edit or remove anything i've misspoken about.

but coming from someone who went too deep into selfshipping in the past and worries about the mental health of people who do: It's None Of Your Business!!

delusions aren't morally "bad" or "wrong". holding deep feelings abt a character isn't inherently delusion-based and also isn't morally "bad" or "wrong". and neither of those is the same as -- speaking from experience (above content warnings come into play here) -- being obsessed with a character to the point that you self-isolate and emotionally self harm because you wish so badly that the character was real and you believe there isn't a point to life if you'll never meet that character... and this is also not inherently delusion-based and ALSO not morally "bad" or "wrong".

these separate things -- delusions, deep feelings, and unhealthy obsession -- CAN intersect but just as often don't. none are immoral, and all are deserving of being approached with compassion and respect, in whatever way is most appropriate.

negative, harmful ACTIONS that some people take in these states are worth bringing up to them when it's safe to do so, depending on the details of their situation, but the states themselves don't have any moral weight. ie, if someone's harassing others for sharing their f/o because they're in a dark, obsessive place, that is a morally negative ACTION, not a morally negative mental state. they need to take responsibility for harm they've CAUSED, not for what they're experiencing internally.

but if you're calling people "immature" or "delusional" as an insult, something tells me you're not really considering that! whether through malice or just a lack of compassion, you don't see worth in how another person approaches this community.

you aren't better for thinking of a character a certain way, and neither is the person you're being ableist towards. if no harm is being done to you or others, you're just being a dick for the sake of being a dick. listen to other people, learn, and do better.

if you think someone is genuinely in a bad mental place because of selfshipping (wrt isolating and self harm), approach them as another human being. meet them where they're at. don't patronize them, don't call them "delusional", treat them like someone who has their own thoughts and values.

they may want help, or they may not, and you have to respect them for their choice no matter what YOU think is right. there is no truly right way to approach someone who's in a dark place, but you can at least avoid saying things that FOR SURE will make them feel talked down to, belittled, or shamed. if they aren't ready now, maybe they will be ready for help in the future, and shutting them down will make them less likely to seek that help.

(i was also going to put THIS in the tags but i should probably put it here: when i say 'learn and change' i mean it as a positive. people have the capacity to learn and grow and become better; if you've said something in all of this that can be read as harmful... consider why it's harmful and why you said it.

you aren't the same person you were a year ago. 5yrs ago. 10yrs ago. you have grown and you will continue to grow. but if you can be more aware of it and grow more purposefully and consciously? all the better.)

[chaos-and-recover]

I dunno if I am venting, asking aita, or asking advice or am I overreacting but you're probably the only person I follow who is old (I am 17 and most people I follow are around that age) so here goes. so I have this cousin who my whole family hates and has spent my whole life saying horrible things about. This cousin literally moved across the country (we are in the USA) and everyone says that she moved away because she was tired of our family calling her out on her abusive behavior. (Cont)

Okay, wow. This is a doozy. I'm gonna answer all the messages in this series probably in chunks (but in this one post) 'cause there's a lot to say here and I think it makes sense so I can interject thoughts as I go and address all the various things going on here. First off, based on this first message, I'm kind of on your cousin's side. I'd probably also move across the country if my entire family talked shit about me all the time.

I grew up hearing how she's awful, a bitch, unhygienic, house is a hoarding disaster of filth, etc, like she's not a good person. Anyway despite living so far away she's managed to come to important events like weddings and funerals. Now I notice that any time someone calls her out, like asks how smelly her house is, if she's keeping it clean, or if her friend(s?) still put up with her, she has a really nasty insult ready and it's been like that my whole life so I believe it. (Cont)

Okay so, obviously I don't know her so she might be all of those things, but does your family have examples of her shitty behaviour beyond being unhygienic and possibly a hoarder? Because those things, to me, don't match up with "she's a bitch" and "she's awful," but being a bitch might be an understandable reaction to people giving you crap about the way you live. And hoarding in particular is very often a symptom of a larger mental health issue. Asking if her friends "still put up with her" is rude as fuck too, like so far your family kind of sound like bullies.

Anyway so last year a relative got married and my cousin showed up. My cousin is in her late 30s idk exactly. So my aunt (also her aunt) points out that maybe if she hadn't been a bitch and took better care of herself she would be married. She said she was happy in her relationship life but we all immediately pointed out she wasn't in a relationship so she should stop lying. (Cont)

As someone at the tail end of their 30s who is unmarried this is a WILDLY inappropriate thing to say. There are a million reasons why someone might not be married in their 30s, not least of which is "they don't want to be." I also think it's either a generational or a cultural thing that people just don't get married in their 20s as much anymore -- generational because my parents were 20 and 24 got married but both of my siblings were in their early 30s, two of my best friends didn't get married until they were 34 and 35, respectively, and for a variety of reasons I have a ton of other friends in their 30s who are not married at all. Some people just don't get married! Some people don't get married until it makes financial sense (either actually paying for the wedding or something more practical like joint tax filing. It actually doesn't always make sense to file as a couple). But I also wonder if that's just a cultural thing because it certainly seems that getting married in your 20s is still something a lot of people do in some regions of the US and in some other cultures, so I don't know. But I do think it's no one else's fucking business why someone else isn't married (for me it's because I straight up cannot be bothered dating and do not want to alter my life and my routine to make room for another person lmao so that makes getting married a bit of a challenge). Also even if she was not in a relationship (later messages make it clear that's apparently not the case) you CAN be perfectly happy being single. Like, I am absolutely happy with my non-existent dating life and relationship status. So accusing her of lying about being happy because you think she's single is bonkers, frankly. Being in a relationship doesn't automatically make you happy, and you don't need a romantic relationship in order to be happy.

She said we clearly knew nothing about her, that she isn't messy, is happy with how she looks, and we need to stop lying about her hygiene and other things. Now I personally have never thought she smelled bad but I only see her at big events so ofc she wouldn't. Anyway the wedding had alcohol so we all got really drunk (including me, but including her also so she can't judge) and things got heated between her and my mom (Cont)

So okay. I want you to think about this. Your family says she's smelly and unhygienic but you've never observed that yourself, so why do you believe them? Maybe she does only clean up for family events, but if that's the only time you see her, do you know that's true? Do you have any reason, beyond what your family has said, to actually think she does have hygiene issues? This might also be a mental health issue, fyi. There are a ton of reasons someone might not be "clean." There are also a lot of physical conditions that might cause someone to smell "bad." And it is, frankly, not anybody's business.

As for the drinking, yeah getting sloppy drunk isn't a good look but it also happens at weddings. I'm neutral on that point, tbh.

(my mom cheated on my dad and my cousin told everybody and that's how my dad found out I'm not kid but that's a long story) anyway so she got kicked out of the wedding and took an uber to the hotel. The next day I went to the hotel and we were both hungover so maybe not in the best mood. when I talked to her she told me that our family was abusive and toxic and I pointed out it's unrealistic that everyone in the whole family except her is abusive (cont) so maybe she needs to logically look at herself and realize it's more believable that only she is lying instead of everyone except her. And she just said I should research family scapegoats. I told her that it was her fault my parents divorced and my dad doesn't pay child support and she told me to leave. Well I felt kinda bad and so a few days later when she was back home I messaged her about what she'd like for a wedding because that's what ppl talk about after a wedding. (Cont)

She's right about the family scapegoat. It's not uncommon for abusive people to target one person and not another. Like, a parent may be abusive toward one kid, but not another, and they may turn others against that one kid, cause resentment, and ruin one kid's life while their sibling(s) may think they have a great childhood. It sucks! But it's absolutely a real abuse tactic. In your family's case I think it's pretty likely everyone didn't get together and decide to be shitheads to your cousin, but it started SOMEWHERE, it sounds like SOMEONE turned everyone against her.

I will say she shouldn't have told everyone your mom had an affair, but it's straight up not her fault your parents divorced. Your parents divorced because your mom cheated. It sucks! I'm sorry you had to go through that. She should keep her mouth shut about things that aren't her business (if she knew and no one else did, telling your dad might have been acceptable depending on the circumstances/relationship, but not spreading gossip to everyone else. That's not cool).

She said a bunch of stuff and then mentioned that her wedding would be a dry wedding. I pointed out that she was being hypocritical and a bridezilla because nobody wants to go to a dry wedding AND I know she drinks PLUS she got wasted like everybody else at our most recent wedding. And she said that since it was allowed then it's not hypocritical but that as I wasn't old enough to drink then it wouldn't matter anyway. (Cont)

Getting sloppy drunk at one wedding and then having a dry wedding yourself isn't really hypocritical. There are a lot of reasons someone might have a dry wedding, from money (open bars are expensive and cash bars are kinda tacky imo) to someone involved with/at the wedding in recovery for alcohol addiction to just not wanting people to get sloppy. I do think a dry wedding is probably gonna reduce the number of people who want to go but that might also be the goal.

Now granted I did lose my temper and tell her that it wasn't like she ever had to worry about getting married anyway because nobody loved her and since it hadn't happened for her yet then she should accept it wouldn't ever. I will admit that I reacted badly to that. She then told me to go and then blocked me. Well I have two accounts (one I made before I was 13 but I said i was 21 so I could have a fb and she followed me on both)well lo and behold six months ago she announces shes engaged (cont)

Yeah that wasn't cool, honestly. But also if I had a younger cousin who said something like that I'd probably be like "yeah ok kid sure" so like she could've probably reacted better.

I message her asking for an invite and she reminds me that it's a dry wedding and I said that's ok. She says she's not sure she wants me to come based on my behavior but she'll think about it. Well I notice that nowhere on any of her social media does she talk about her fiance or boyfriend at all, except to say who she is marrying and it's her best friend, who lives where she moved. I message him (we don't follow each other) cont I'm like how long have you been dating and why haven't you said anything on social media. He says they've been together for years but they're both private people. I don't know anything about him beyond that they've been friends (dating?) for like almost 15 or more years or smth. She only ever talked about him like a friend. Which I thought was weird. But I keep that to myself. Well because she always made it to all weddings and funerals I say yes I'd like to go. (Cont)

This might also be a bit of a generational disconnect. She's roughly my age and while our generation definitely had some early forms of social media by high school, we didn't grow up on it the same way younger generations did and the concept of sharing EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME is still a little foreign to us. Either that or we did the oversharing every aspect of our lives in our teens/early 20s and are now pulling back from that. It seems like every day more and more people I know are leaving FB and other social media platforms. Years ago when I was seeing someone he went to change his relationship status to 'in a relationship' with me after like 2 dates and I had to be like "whoa hold on there bro." I hadn't even mentioned to my family that I was seeing someone (because TWO DATES). Some people just don't put all their business on social media.

So I get an invite and so i invite the whole family. We show up but she has no room for us and said she only sent out a few invites but since I got invited I told everyone where the wedding was. Her fiance was there and kinda stepped in but it never got heated or anything but he showed us cheap hotels because they just didn't have room for everyone and they weren't expecting that many people. But when I was in the house I noticed it looked clean and smelled normal. (Cont)

Okay you're young so I'll chalk this up to not knowing what goes in to planning a wedding but DON'T DO THIS. Weddings are expensive and they are also planned down to the very last detail, INCLUDING having EXACT numbers for catering. You're basically buying dinner for all your guests, and it can be expensive. If you're having a buffet-style or more casual wedding you might have extra food but in a lot of cases the caterers are preparing the meals for the people who have RSVP'd and there won't be a ton of extra food just in case. You can't just add a bunch of extra people at the last minute because there won't be enough food, and in this case, not enough space. Most wedding invites have you choose your meal when you RSVP so they make sure they have enough of each option for everyone. If your invite says +1 you can bring a guest, otherwise you don't. You DO NOT invite a bunch of random people, especially family who don't even like this person and weren't invited for a reason (why would they even want to go if they all hate her so much?)

Also, you were in her house and it was clean and didn't smell, consider why you still believe your family who say she's unhygienic.

My family is clearly angry but they're not psycho so they keep it to themselves when he drives us there. So her and fiance ask to talk with me alone at a diner and give me a talk about how I wasn't supposed to invite everyone which offended me because they're family but I have never met him so I don't want to be rude. They both say they've managed to work it out and had extra food so it was okay this time but that in case other people get married or future events I should be aware that this behavior isn't acceptable. Which yes got my hackles raised but i'm trying to be nice. Well anyway at some point she had to leave for a hair appointment and needs to go but I am not done eating so she takes an Uber and he eats until I'm done eating before taking me back to the hotel. I take the alone time to bring up like hey do you know the woman you're about to marry is abusive and toxic and that he deserves better than someone he has to remind to shower and clean up after and someone who is kind and I just blurt out that she's a hypocrite who got sloppy drunk and I'm like I don't know how often she's lied to you about what kind of person she is and that he should know how toxic she is and to his credit he listened but then he asks why do you think her family wasn't invited, because they're abusive, and then asks what my goal was in talking shit about his future wife to him as soon as she's out of earshot and asks if I talk this way about everybody who isn't in the room with me. And I point out it's more logical that she is the abusive liar, not literally everyone else except her. And then he says she's always been loving and kind, cleans a normal amount, and as far as he's been around her taken care of her hygiene and that even when he visited the home she grew up in it was clean and that he will not listen to me talk about her like that anymore. When I get back to the hotel I tell my family everything and they came uncorked and kept calling her and texting her and so they rescinded all our invitations. We all pointed out that we spent a lot of money to get there and she said that wasn't her problem and then blocked all of us. I tried to show up to the wedding but was told to either leave on my own or be escorted by the police so I left. I didn't know this but my family showed up after me and stuff went down but i dont know what because nobody will tell me. Anyway so after the wedding I tried to contact her through multiple means but i was blocked on all of them as we all were. She did post a few videos publicly for everyone to see, so I had a mutual friend who wasn't blocked but didn't attend the wedding show me the videos and the wedding was very cheap and small. But that is what she told me she wanted last year. I tried talking to her siblings but her siblings also blocked me. I tried talking to some relatives of her now husband but they didn't respond to me, and i may have lost my temper and said cruel things so they all blocked me without responding. I made a few accounts and emails contacting them again asking for evidence of her claims but nobody ever responded but I was able to send emails. (Cont)

Yeah I'm on the cousin and her fiance's side still. He sounds like a decent guy standing up for his future wife. And if he has in fact known her for 15 years, he DOES know what kind of person she is. I think it's clear you meant well in warning him about what you've heard about her your whole life, but I think you should consider that your family aren't always the good guys in every situation. Even people you love can be wrong and cruel. I think if you can go through the trouble of making additional accounts to ask her siblings for evidence of her claims (you should stop, btw. They blocked you because they don't want to discuss it, leave them be) you should also maybe ask the family you do speak to for actual evidence of her being an awful person and being filthy and smelly (which, again... nobody's business, and not a reason to be nasty to someone???).

I think, based on what I've read here, it comes down to this: your family does not like this cousin and they make no secret of it. Why on earth would she tell them anything, invite them to major events like her wedding, or be anything other than nasty to them in return???