#i have thought of like finding new hobbies that would replace the old ones that make me feel bad because im like supposed to be good

[imababblekat]

Simon sees you sitting curled up in a chair, eyes peering lost at the sketchbook and computer before. He knows that look. It’s a look you often get when the team finally gets some time off, but you brain is stuck in this void of being unable to commit to any hobbies you once enjoyed. You told him about it once, it was offhandedly and you hadn’t delved much into it with due to still being fairly new and not wanting to bother the apparent cold stone lieutenant. Simon paid attention though, and this detail about yourself had been added to his mentail folder of his teammates.

A deep breath huffed out your nose, head drooping into your folded arms, when your ears picked up on the sound of light footsteps entering the kitchen area you resided.

“The usual?”, came Simons gruff voice, large hands reaching into the cabinet for your and his mugs.

“The usual.”, you mumbled in reply, staring at your phone and resisting the urge to start doom scrolling.

It was a battle you lost as you reached out to open an app and scroll mindlessly through its feed, the light clinking of Simon making you both tea behind you. You’re not sure how long he had taken, too lost in the endless information of peoples lives and other nonsensical things scrolling past your dulled eyes, not registering a thing you watched or read. At some point though, your phone had been snatched from your hands, replaced by a warm cup of your favorite tea, Simon pulling out the chair beside you to sit with his own.

You couldn’t even bother the smallest fuss at the large soldier for taking your phone, simpling taking a sip and then blindly staring into the liquid void.

“That bad today?”

You nod with a groan, putting your cup down to splay your hands out at the objects you once enjoyed before you.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I thought maybe I was bogged down by knowing I had chores to take care of, but even after finishing those I still can’t get myself to do any of my hobbies!”

Simon sipped his tea, dark eyes glancing up at your downtrodden expression. You thought nothing of his silence, having known him for a while now that his silence was him listening. If he truly wasn’t interested, he would have left, hell he wouldn’t have even bothered to make you a drink.

“I just. . .”, you hold your head in your hands, “I don’t feel myself. I finally get a break, and I can’t do anything I wanted to do. What’s the point of having hobbies if every time I try one of them, I immediately become disinterested?”

The Brit beside you stares down into his own mug now, thinking on your words, a silence filling in besides the muffled sound of Johnny bellowing songs in the shower upstairs. Before, he wouldn’t give two shits about something like this, leaving you to figure it out or not all on your own. Of course, being apart of the 141 it was only a matter of time before you became apart of this oddly dangerous family of sorts, and Simon found himself caring for you just as much as he did for the other three, even if he ever expressed it.

“Maybe doing nothin’, is what you’re suppos’d do.”

You quirked a brow at him.

“You? Telling me to do nothing?”

Simon rolled his eyes, sitting back against the creaking old dinning chair.

“Yeah, shocker I know, but trust me, after years of doing this shit, sometimes you jus’ gotta kick ya feet up and do fuck all.”

You look back to your tea before taking another sip, thinking on his words. He had a point though. As frustrating as it was, wanting to engage in activities that would normally bring you joy, it was only natural to not always be motivated to do them, especially with the grueling type of work you all did.

“Welp,” you shrug, closing your lap top shut and throwing your sketchbook atop it, “guess I’m doing fuck all today.”

A light, deep chuckle came from Simon, him always finding it kind of funny when outlandish vocabulary came from your lips. You never came off as the type to say such words, but then again you also didn’t exactly fit into the picture of the intimidating guys you were so close to.

“Good. Relax, ya earned it.”

You smile up at Simon, your eyes crinkling in the corners something that brought him some warmth.

“We earned it, Simon.”

[xjulixred45x]

How would be dead royalty au zagreus with his own queen/king of the underworld? He would want heirs? I just want the fluff before the heavy stuff appears(yandere asks)

That would be kind of cute honestly.

Concept of the AU

To refer to Zag's partner in this Au (or reader, as you want) I think they would be called "Consort" (because 1- it is gender neutral and 2- they have the same rank as Zagreus).

and in a way I imagine that Consort was brought as a kind of gift to Zagreus from Zeus (since in a dialogue in the game he offers to give Zagreus a mate when he arrives at Olympus. as Zagreus now replaces his father, He is part of the Olympian pantheon, so Zeus wants to keep his word).

However, when Consort was "chosen" they were SUPER intimidated by the idea of Zagreus (after all, he was the god who killed their FATHER, ANOTHER GOD and ruled the Underworld, they had reason to be afraid) and Zagreus was taken by surprise with all this, because he didn't think that Zeus would continue with that (the poor guy was so involved in the paperwork that he didn't even notice how the other gods were winking at him about it).

Consort would be surprised with a Zagreus who is very shy about the situation and who is not at all as intimidating as they thought. Apart from that well, Zagreus cares about their opinion despite being a mortal (in this case, I love mortal readers, sorry not sorry), giving them a rank equal to his, total freedom of movement through the Underworld, security protection anti-escape, etc.

but above all, Zagreus would be PATIENT with Consort. He knows he has a bad reputation, so he lets them approach him on their own, at their own pace. He honestly finds their nervousness adorable, but doesn't rush anything.

But when they are already in a relationship? The man is CLINGY, Zagreus is touch-starved, you can rip this Headcanon from my cold, dead hands.

We all agree that one of Zagreus' love languages is giving gifts, although in the context of Dead Royalty, now that he is the KING of the Underworld, he can afford to give his partner more extravagant gifts, but they come from the heart, Like, does Consort want to start any new hobbies? Now they have a sewing set in their shared room, do they need clothes? They have a new set in their favorite color, are Consort's gold accessories too heavy? now they are of silver, etc.

He still maintains some of his customs before "that" happened, such as randomly giving Consort bottles of ambrosia/nectar, playing together with Cerberus, walking through some parts of the Underworld that are not dangerous (although no one tries to attack him anymore because well, he's the boss). Consort ends up bringing back a bit of the old Zagreus in a way.

As for the topic of children...it's confusing, on the one hand I think Zagreus WANTS children, but he definitely still has too much of his own trauma with his own father to think he would be a good father, even if Consort reassures him, he would still somewhat insecure. There is also the issue that he does not know if the child could have the same problem of being stillborn, he does not want Consort to go through that traumatic experience for a "whim".

It doesn't help that some gods are concerned about this prospect of Zagreus having children and suffering the same fate as his father (and grandfather), especially Zeus.

although if Consort wanted children/became pregnant, Zagreus would be very, very happy at the idea of having a child, and would definitely be a better father than the one he had.

Although he definitely does not judge Consort if they does not want to have children, it is not obligatory with him.

that's all for now :3

______

(ESPAÑOL)

Eso sería bastante lindo sinceramente.

para referirse a la pareja de Zag en este Au(o lector, como quieran) creo que les dirian "Consorte"(porque 1- es neutro con el genero y 2- tienen el mismo rango que Zagreus).

y en cierta forma me imagino que Consorte fue traída como una especie de regalo para Zagreus por parte de Zeus(ya que en un diálogo del juego se ofrece a darle a Zagreus una pareja cuando llegue al olimpo. como ahora Zagreus suple a su padre, el forma parte del panteon Olimpico, asi que Zeus quiere cumplir su palabra).

sin embargo, cuando Consorte fue "elegido" estaban SÚPER intimidados por la idea de Zagreus (después de todo, era el dios que mato a su PADRE, OTRO DIOS y gobernaba el Inframundo, tenian razones para tener miedo) y Zagreus fue tomado por sorpresa con todo esto, porque no penso que Zeus siguiera con eso(el pobre estaba tan metido en el papeleo que nisiquiera se dio cuenta de como los demás dioses le estaban dando guiños al respecto).

Consorte seria sorprendida con un Zagreus muy timido con la situación y que no es para nada tan intimidante como lo pensaban. aparte de que bueno, a Zagreus le importa su opinión pese a ser un mortal(en este caso, amo los lectores mortales, sorry not sorry), dandole un rango igual al suyo, total libertad de movimiento por el Inframundo, proteccion de la seguridad anti-huidas, etc.

pero sobretodo, Zagreus seria PACIENTE con Consorte. sabe que tiene mala fama, por lo que deja que se acerquen por su cuenta, a su ritmo. sinceramente encuentra su nerviosismo adorable, pero no apura nada.

¿pero cuando ya estan tal cual en una relación? eo hombre es PEGAJOSO, Zagreus esta hambriento de tacto, puedes arrancar este Headcanon de mis manos frias y muertas.

todos estamos de acuerdo que uno de los lenguajes de amor de Zagreus es dar regalos, aunque en el contexto de Dead Royalty, ahora que el es el REY del Inframundo, puede permitirse darle a su pareja regalos mas extravagantes, pero que vienen del corazón, como, ¿Consorte quiere iniciar algun hobbie nuevo? ahora tienen un set de costura en su cuarto compartido, ¿les hace falta ropa? tienen un set nuevo de su color favorito, ¿los accesorios de Consorte son muy pesados? ahora son de plata, etc.

igual mantiene algunas de sus costumbres antes de que pasara "eso", como darle a Consorte botellas de ambrosía/nectar de forma aleatoria, jugar juntos con Cerbero, pasear por algunas partes del Inframundo que no son peligrosas (aunque igualmente ya nadie intenta atacarlo porque bueno, es el jefe). Consorte termina trayendo un poco del viejo Zagreus en cierta forma.

en cuanto al tema de los hijos...es confuso, por una parte creo que Zagreus QUERRIA hijos, pero definitivamente aun tiene mucho de su propio trauma con su propio padre para pensar que sera un buen padre, aun si Consorte le tranquiliza, seguiria un tanto inseguro. tambien esta el tema de que no sabe si el niño podria tener su mismo problema de nacer muerto, no quiere que Consorte pase por esa experiencia traumatica por un "capricho".

no ayuda que algunos dioses les preocupe esta perspectiva de Zagreus teniendo hijos y sufriendo el mismo destino que su padre (y abuelo), especialmente Zeus.

aunque si Consorte quisiera hijos/queda embarazada, Zagreus estaria muy, muy feliz de la idea de tener un hijo, y definitivamente seria un mejor padre que el que tuvo.

aunque definitivamente no juzga a Consorte si no quiere tener hijos, no es obligatorio con el.

es todo por ahora:3

[ghostieyanyan]

Have you heard of the musical Ride the Cyclone? I thought of an MC who’s inspired by Jane Doe. They died and lost their head somewhere so they got isekai’d into twisted wonderland with a doll head to replace their lost one instead and they walk around with their headless doll. They have no memory of who they used to be and they’re very naive about how things work in the new world they’re transported to. If anyone of the boys goes Yandere for Jane Doe!Mc, any one of the would take advantage of their amnesia and keep them to theirselves. Which one of the boys do you think would be the most manipulative when it comes to stealing Jane Doe!Mc?

If you don’t know the musical, feel free to skip.

i havent seen the musical, but i love the idea of just some twst yandere taking advantage of amnesia mc. like they would use mc to make them their perfect little play thing or "help" them find themselves, only to hurt them with betrayal. also i know that a good handfull of the twst characters are sadistic but im gonna just list a few (cause if i went their all of them, qwq, this will be a very long post xD)

Also there’s only one drawing in this post (because it felt weird not not include one so ye) but it’s mainly fanfic and I’ll be labeled it as fanfic and not as fanfic plus art… if that’s cool owo

~Amnesia!Mc~

Yan!Ace x mc x Yan!Deuce

Yan!Lilia x mc

Yan!Rook x mc

Yan!Trey x mc

Warning: yandere, manipulation, stalking, threats, hint of murder, mention of war and starvation, hunting, displaying you like a animal(?), kidnapping,

~~~~~

Ace and Deuce

Why are these two together? cause they are chaotic together and i love how it can be wholesome at times.

In the relationship, they both agreed to help mc and also show them the ropes of twisted wonderland. Deuce, more on the side of helping mc with finding themself, because he understands how it can be very difficult at times. But he also doesn't want mc to go home so soon. Ace, more on the side of wanting mc to stay in twisted wonderland, but also help them find themself with him and deuce in mind. They basically agreed to be the opposite sides to the same coin.

They'll, of course, fight with each other on how to help you. what thing are most important for you to work on right now? but they overall want the same thing. but they are still very mischievous when they want to be.

Example, Ace will in intentional start fights with deuce to show mc that they'll be so lost without you to step in to help. or even, when they get into a situation that they need your help to solve.

"only their perfect can save them. don't leave them alone. they'd be lost without you."

But deuce, he would show you the amazing things that twisted wonderland could offer and see if you like anything or dislike it. i imagine he has a book with all your like and dislikes, your taste, favorite food and drinks, how you like certain things or your hobbies. plus if you forget anything, he'll be there to help.

if someone outside their group ask about their strange behavior with you, they will deny it all. but if this person keeps digging, ace and deuce will show them how protective they can be.

if you asked about their strange behavior, they'll just tell you that you're imagining things.

"maybe its some of your old memories coming back? but they don't make sense? strange..."

~~~~~

Lilia

"Awww what a cute little human that lost their way~ it reminds me of when i met Silver~ so cute~"

this man will 100% use your amnesia to make you into his play thing. he could mold you into a sibling for Silver. he could mold you into a great warrior for malleus, side by side with sebek. or he can even mold you to be his and his alone.

with his years of experience of life, he'll show you anything you wish to see and make your dreams come true. he'll tell you stories, a mix between fairy tales to myths to his very own experiences. he'll show you everything and anything, for the price of your name~

he's given you no reason on not to trust him. Lilia takes great care of you when you first came to his world. i mean with tweedldee and tweedledumber, plus that beast cat, you'll likely be dead by the first week.

Lilia takes every opportunity to take you away to diasomnia and cares for you. with a high secured castle plus luxury food, he tried to feed you his meet one time and you fell into a coma for a week... maybe the vegs were bad?

if you had an issue with this arrangement, he'll gladly show you the dangerous of this world without his aid. he'll show you a small unimportant war that was just west coast of the main land. all the deaths and threats, the horrors in peoples faces. how some people became mad and turn against their own kind for a glimpse of hope in their future, only for it to be ripe away when they get caught. Lilia will also show you the horror that are not necessarily violent like war. hungry starving kids and families that had to turn to stealing just to make sure they're guaranteed a place in tomorrow. he'll tell you that the cycle repeats whether people like it or not.

"That's why its safer to be with me. the world is a cruel place, a place that a sweet angel like you doesnt belong. this place also has a good handful of cueal people aswell. youre not even garentee that crowel will find a way home for you, he doesnt even know that place! thats why its safer with me. ill keep you safe. now rest... youve had a very long day..."

~~~~~

Rook

the beauty of it all! To Rook, you are like a blank piece of paper waiting for a poet to spill their silk words on you. you're like a caterpillar waiting for some leaves to turn into a chrysalis and then to your turn form as a beautiful butterfly~

Rook doesn't have any ill intent for you but he merely aims to preserve your pure innocents. in his words, keep your angelic wings white from the impurities of the world. he will not hesitate to strike down anything or any one that wants you to fall, or cover your wings in their mud.

he admits, its difficult to learn anything about you when you don't even remember who you are, but in a way its beautiful for him. like a bird learning how to fly.

if you ask him about his view on beauty, he'll gladly show you all the beauties in the world. hell show you how some things look scary or mysterious can look enchanted. but if anything ugly comes in your way, he'll shield you from it and make it disappear on the face of twisted wonderland.

if you dont like what hes doing and you try to run from him.. lets say Rook loves a good hunt. He will not stop until he finds his butterfly. of course, he doesn't want to hurt you, or even dirty you in any means, but he will threaten you. Rook would say that if anything bad would happen to you, to not have the light in your eyes that he loves so much, he'll display you like those beautiful insect display in a museum. you'll forever be part of his display from his hunts.

but you dont want that to happen right? he wants you to live! to fly with the other butterflies.

but maybe Night Raven College is no place for a fragile butterfly like you to be in. he doesnt might taking you away for only his eyes to see. he'll take great care of you.

"what do you say~?"

~~~~~

Trey

Whether Trey likes it or not, he takes great care of his dorm, like a big brother or even a dad for some. so when he saw you, his instict took over and he immediately was worried for you.

"did you eat yet? how's your day? anyone giving you a hard time? are ace and deuce causing trouble for you? you look pale! come on, follow me. we have some treats in Heartslabyul that will make you feel better"

to say he spoils you with sweets is an understatement, and if you are craving sweets then he'll gladly make you something else. don't worry about repaying him. you're smile and well being are perfect payment.

even though Trey has a very busy schedule, being the vice housewarden, being part of the science club, taken care of his house, plus riddle, he still makes time for you.

a lot of people wonders how but like magic, he makes it works. for some, its a little creepy. Trey starts to show up, like he knows your schedule like the back of his hand. always with treats and a drink in hand.

if there are people causing you trouble, or in trey's eyes, people he does not approves of. he'll tell you in a "im just looking out for you manner."

Trey will get you, sit you down, hands you some treats and talks to you about his "issues" with your friends. he might just say some things that make you see your friends in a different light. the type of light that makes you not rely on them too much. But you can rely on Trey if anything comes up.

also whether he sees you in the light of a sibling or a partner, you're not 100% sure which one. but all the things he does for you... is coming from the heart..

~~~~~

[kikoesbonbon]

Character : Alhaitham

Mentioning : Kaveh, Cyno, Traveler (not you guys).

Themes : Self awareness, different dimensions, posesif (ig-)

Alhaitham knows who you are. And he won't let you go that easily ferguso.

If asked what he thinks of you, Alhaitham will find you an oddball who likes his stubborn personality. Even though he had never met you before. Even Kaveh, who just lives with him, can't stand his arrogant attitude. Yes. Bulliing Kaveh is one of his many hobbies when he gets bored dealing with his work as a scribe and acting grand sage besides reading tons of books from the House of Daena. Take the uwu lion key from Kaveh. (Didn't expect Kaveh himself to like that cute wooden lion. Who knows. I don't know. I'm just assuming)

There are rumors that people with vision will get closer to you. Look, how lucky are the vision holders. they thought. Alhaitham did not bother. He had had enough of the other ramblings of academiya students. They tried to bring other gods closer after dumping Leser lord Kusanali and trying to create new gods and now they are seeking new divine knowledge from you. How selfish are they.

In addition, they are trying various ways to get vision quickly with research and research on 101 ways to get your vision quickly (life hack. Very helpful so that you live in prosperity so that you are closer to you. No clickbait. Very helpful in getting divine knowledge with joss - fast. Guaranteed you won't lose. Money back isn't effective. If the transaction money is still with us-) what a crazy marketing technique.

Alhaitham doesn't expect anything other than peace with his boring activities which are waking up, going to work, not forgetting to have breakfast, coming back at night, not forgetting to bring the key to the cave every day when he goes to work as the acting grand sage. I swear, Sage Azar is really a burden. It's been a problem, he also has to replace him. Look, how displeased the academia were with her decision to become a provisional grand sage. Let it be, he has no interest in becoming a sage because it takes a long time to find a replacement for a new sage. After all, he would not even offer to become a sage because he was appointed by Lord Kusanali because he could be relied on.

Alhaitham doesn't expect anything but peace while drinking coffee alone at home while reading his boring colored cover book which he often carries and reads anywhere it doesn't matter where he sits as long as he can read that book. Kaveh often complains about how bad Alhaitham is when it comes to choosing interior decorations for his old and boring house. His aesthetic architect's soul was terrified to see him. (I swear, what kind of knowledge book is this kid reading that is so engrossed, Paimon herself gets dizzy just reading a few words)

His calm changed when he saw several meteors falling-eh.. Shooting stars I mean. Many stars fell in the sky that night. Blue, purple.. It is said that there is a time when the god gives mercy to the chosen one. The dendro vision on the wrist of the right arm shines just as a golden star falls down in Sumeru's night sky. Just then Alhaitham heard someone's voice enter his head.

"Welcome home, Alhaitham."

When asked how he felt when Alhaitham faced someone who sounded similar to what you sounded like, his ignorant soul became curious. Is that you? The God who gave divine blessings to the academic scholars?

"Acting Grand Sage, I would like to report on the results of the research I got from The Dune of Carouses together with Cyno this afternoon." You said while opening a small note sheet of your research results.

"So after I researched at The Mausoleum of King Deshret before..."

Alhaitham stared at your figure speaking in a voice similar to the one that came to mind at the time. Your voice was only faintly heard while you were talking, since Alhaitham's mind was only roaming about you.

"..I found some hidden mechanisms related to some of the theories I came up with. Regarding that because it requires entry with the Scarlet Sand Slate, fortunately there was help from the Traveler in this research with the Scarlet Stone he obtained back then..."

Alhaitham cleared his throat making you look up at him. "Yes?" You tilted your head to look at his tall figure. "Anything to interrupt?" maybe he cleared his throat because the delivery of your report was not appropriate?

"No, actually I was just curious. I was wondering, is it true that you ■■■■?" What an awkward question from him to interrupt what you are talking about. You only reacted by furrowing your brows at him.

"That's right. Are you tired? Need to rest? Should I not disturb you for now?"

"No, just curious. I just adjusted the name of your previous report notes".

"Oh really?" you raise your eyebrows. What's with this guy today?

"And the names also happen to be similar." he said rubbing his chin as if he was thinking.

"Alhaitham? Someone like you has acquaintances? What a joke. Besides, the name ■■■■ is the name many people use. Not just one." You sweat a little, flicking your palms forward.

A few months later, you told Alhaitham that once you graduated from Akademia, you would not continue your course. You will move to Fontaine to study mechanical engineering. I don't know what got into Alhaitham, he insisted that you stay in Sumeru. But you also insist on saying you can't stay in one place. After having a fight, you finally got tired of compromising with Alhaitham and ignored him for a few days.

Alhaitham is not stupid he knows you are hiding something. And you're not very good at lying, it seems.

So he has to find out for himself. Alhaitham saw some of your reports scattered on the table. It seems almost finished. He looked at you with his head asleep on the table. You're pretty diligent for a scolar like you. Just a little more and you graduate from the academy. You don't want to admit and you don't want to say that Alhaitham helped you a lot. What a tsundere—

Your graduation day is only a few weeks away, you have prepared all your thesis that only needs to be sent on the table. Alhaitham again saw you sleeping peacefully on the table. He sat next to you and pulled your left shoulder to lean on him.

His eyes stared at your face, and smiled faintly while playing with the ends of your hair. Alhaitham took some papers from your research on the table and read the writing. Your writing is really neat.

The next day you panicked into Alhaitham's study by breaking down the door. "Alhaitham—!" You hastily take a breath. "E-everyone, all of my theses are gone!"

"Oh?" Alhaitham looked at you with a flat gaze.

"Calm yourself,"

"Oh? Oh, you said it?! How many months do you think it took me to do that Alhaitham!?" you broke the table.

"All my work is gone! I-I don't know what to do! Without that thesis I can't graduate—"

"Alhaitham—you must help me!" you pulled his collar.

"I said calm down, you can still work on it again. There's still next year for graduation." Alhaitham patted your shaking shoulder.

"What do you mean-" your eyes widen, shaking and looking down. "D-don't tell me.. Alhaitham, you did this?"

"I don't-"

"Why did you do that to a scholar under you Alhaitham?! You know that's a offense right? Alhaitham you bastard. Give me back all my thesis papers!" you shouted angrily at him. "I didn't take all your thesis papers." he said sarcastically.

"Liar! I believe you were the last to stay at the House of Daena, right? There weren't many people there lingering until midnight there."

"What if you misunderstood? What would you say hm?" his gaze on you was condescending. You hate that look.

"I—" you gritted your teeth in annoyance. You swear, this guy is a complete asshole. "If that happens, I still don't apologize to you." You let go of Alhaitham's collar roughly. "I don't want anything to do with you anymore!"

You stepped angrily to get out of the Grand Sage's room, but were blocked by Alhaitham by slamming the door pushing you closer to the door. You stare at him resentfully. "What the hell are you—!"

"You.. you know how annoying you are lately?" Alhaitham muttered softly in a heavy tone in your ear while leaning back. "You sicken me." he muttered in a thunderous tone as he placed his finger on your hip. "I know who you really are. And I'll make sure to teach you who you stand for. And you won't be able to go anywhere.♡"

»»-----------fin-----------««

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Boy, it's been a long time since I've made this fanfic that I've been struggling since February.😰 It's been 4 months since I abandoned it because I had writer's block.😭🤙

And the ending doesn't match the initial concept that I wanted. But because I'm still innocent for results that are a little more intimate. Forgive me. 🙇

[sumire-no-nikki]

Restoring a 1930s Typewriter + Some Scattered Thoughts

There’s something so magical about holding something this old in one’s hands. Who used it before? What feelings had it translated into words? How many families did it watch grow and scatter? How many houses has it survived?

A couple of months ago I set out to fulfill a lifelong dream of mine to have a vintage typewriter. One evening, I found a listing for this gorgeous piece for relatively cheap. I didn’t know much about the world of manual typewriters but I was eager to learn. And just like that, I was knee deep in a new hobby.

As soon as I got the machine, I went to work. I used cheap toothbrushes and Waschbenzin to clean the slugs. As it is really quite old, some gunk in between the characters were not lifting. I had to improvise and use a sewing needle to scrape the caked ink. I then removed the tattered old ribbon and replaced it with a new one.

I still have the task of cleaning and doing some small repairs on its leather case. And while the platen itself is still in really good condition the feed rollers have flat spots making it a bit temperamental when advancing the paper. I will have to find a specialty store that can replace them in the future. There are areas of chipped paint which should be quick enough to address with some black nail polish. And then for a final touch, it needs to be polished with car wax. But these tasks are secondary. The typewriter is fully working despite its age. It was incredible seeing it come to life the first time I used it. It felt like a fantasy, like time travel.

Throughout the whole process of cleaning and repairing my typewriter, I was constantly reminded that this machine is 87 years old. The curved cover, the font on the decal and the simplicity encapsulates the art deco style from that era. WWII was just starting when this was manufactured. My grandfather wasn’t even born yet. Working with this typewriter was a meditative experience but it also brought on a lot of melancholy thoughts on existence, technology, consumerism.

You can just tell how much thought and care was put into building this typewriter. It’s innovation with purpose, not solely for profit. This machine’s ribbons feed from right to left. Once it is completely wound to one side, there is a button that reverses the gears and the ribbon will then feed from left to right, ensuring that the ink in the ribbon is used up without any waste. There is a button that allows you to type beyond your set margins in case it’s necessary. There is a lever that centers the platen and disengages the margin bell in order to prevent it from jiggling around and breaking while in transport. There is a self-starter key which is practically a tab button. The case comes with clamps that keep the typewriter from moving around. It also allows you to type with the case attached.

The manufacturers and innovators of that time thought about everything. Technology is meant to last. It is meant to address as many problems as possible, and meant to stand alone without needing more attachments. Back in the day, when you purchase something, it’s meant to last your lifetime, if not beyond. Just the fact that it still works after all this time is a testament to the integrity of its creation.

87 years from now, what will our era have left for the future? What will be left of our time when iPhones self destruct every two years to force purchase of the newest model? What will the future generation seek out to repair and refurbish from our time that isn’t made of plastic? What would be “vintage” to them when everything is made to break?

[harrisonbrainrot]

S/o that also has similar car mechanic aspirations as Modern!Han?

Possibly could be a hobby or interest of theirs but then don't specifically work in that field, yet when they're free they help out Han in his little personal car/motorcycle projects.

Like s/o teasing and being sarcastic towards han saying hes doing something wrong or using wrong item and him getting annoyed or something. Or just even being helpful by passing tools and parts, or holding things.

Thoughts?

I do have thots on this because I come from a line of mechanics, so here it goes:

At first it starts out as just wanting to spend time with Han while your relationship is new and fresh. Which meant a lot of time spent in his garage, music blasting, him smoking, and Chewie lounging on the cool floor. It slowly turned into a game of twenty questions every time you were in there. 'What does that do?', 'how do you know that's broken?', 'my car makes a clunking noise but it drives just fine.' Han is always amused by your questions, answering them like you were five given the fact that your knowledge was minimal at best. Then that turned into little lessons. How to change and rotate tires. How to change oil. How to check and change your fluids. Flush your lines. Change your brakes. Soon enough, your car is in the garage and he's teaching you how to fix your own.

'Hold the light right there. No, over a little more, over. Okay, stop. Jesus christ, girl..' is a common occurrence. It takes some adjustment, he's completely used to doing this on his own. He knows how to do this all on his own, he doesn't need help. However, he's not going to deny a pretty little thing her wish to get her hands dirty. Learning to hold the light right and pay attention to what he was doing was lesson one, without even knowing it.

'These are your spark plugs, they use electricity to spark the fuel. They basically.. make your car go. If there's somethin' wrong there, car no go. Got it?'

'Car no go, got it.'

'Atta girl.'

It didn't take long before you were handing him tools when he requested them, holding the nuts and bolts, reaching smaller hands into tight to fit spaces on the engine. He couldn't deny that he was thrilled that you were actually into this. He was proud he had taught you what you knew. It didn't take long before he could step back and watch you repair or replace something. He felt his chest tighten with admiration. Your grease stained hands and arms, the smudges on your face, wearing one of his old, tattered shirts. It made him glow with pride. He'd wrap himself around you, grinning into your neck. 'My lil mechanic, look at you. You're doin' so good, sweetheart.' Which would make you almost combust. You were so eager to learn and please him. He loved that about you, your ability to wiggle and worm your way into his heart and life and make him happy.

It didn't take long for you to be able to blindly hand him a tool while you had your nose stuck in one of his old car magazines. He'd stop and stare, watching your eyes as you read. It made him grin like a madman. He'd nudge your foot with his boot until you glanced up. 'Whatcha readin'? Any good?' And you'd flush slightly, paying attention to the pages again with a small nod.

'You know what I'm reading, you know it's good.'

'Yeah, sure.. but I wanna hear ya say it.'

That always earns an eye roll. 'It's so good, baby. Real riveting stuff.' He'd moan softly, tossing his head back as if he was fucking you.

'Don't care the context, hearin' that always gets me goin'...' you'd scoff and kick his leg. He was always trying to find a way to sprinkle his dirty thoughts in as many casual settings as he could. He loved it. He loved you. He knew it. He told you as often as he could. 'Love ya, girl.'

'Love you, too.. stinky.'

'Hey! Stinky? Who, me?' He'd point at himself, a frown and pinched brow directed at you.

'You smell like a guy who has been stuck in an engine in a hot garage all day... wait, that's what you've been doing.'

'Shut up..'

[sohemotional]

That Don't Impress Me Much - A Brittana Fic

Summary: The blonde dancer totally knew the effect she had on her. It was so easy to rile the dark-haired woman up and as she beckoned her closer with a finger, Santana kept gazing at her lips, making it so obvious what she wanted.

She leaned closer, knowing that Santana would feel her breathing against her neck and as she expected, there was a sharp, aroused intake of breath from the Latina.

She even closed her eyes, puckering her lips as if Brittany was going to kiss her.

As if.

“My name is no. My sign is no. My number is no. You need to let it go.”

Or

Brittany is tired of being taken advantage of by selfish, egotistical jerks, so she makes a plan with her friend Tina that she can make some idiot fall for her and then ditch them after she has had her fun. Her plans backfire when she’s swept off her feet by arrogant yet surprisingly sweet celebrity Santana Lopez.

Rating: M

Read More on AO3

***This is a companion piece to my other Brittana AU fic, "My Name Is No (You Need To Let It Go),” which you can find here on tumblr or on AO3

Brittany had just about had enough of fuckboys and fuckgirls. 

There she was, sitting alone in a crummy little diner, all by her lonesome on Saturday night, her date nowhere to be found. Being the only hot, young blonde in fishnets, heels so high she was close to God, and a skirt so short it was probably illegal while surrounded by desperate bikers and hicks who licked their lips as they leered at her should have made her feel like she was walking through the valley of the shadow of death. Or maybe she should have felt the way those fish in her dad’s aquarium felt that time Lord Tubbington took up scuba diving as his new hobby. 

Instead, Brittany was unfazed. As she water-skied down the highway of life, she had seen it all. 

That one old Dolly Parton song her mother and Grandma Rose from St. Olaf used to like so much was playing in the background now. It made her pretty nostalgic for the good old days in the Pierce house. Sometimes Brittany felt this one should have been the soundtrack to her life, if she ever had to choose a replacement for “Candy” by Cameo.

Don't try to cry your way out of this

Don't try to lie or I'll catch you in it

Don't try to make me feel sorry for you

Just because I'm blonde

Don't think I'm dumb

Cause this dumb blonde ain't nobody's fool

When you left you thought I'd sit

An' you thought I'd wait

An' you thought I'd cry

You called me a dumb blonde

Ah, but somehow I lived through it

And you know if there's one thing this blonde has learned

Blondes have more fun

There was nothing Brittany loved more than sex and she knew she was the best. Hoeing was her hobby. If there were competitions for this, she would have won the Olympic Gold medal. In fact, she had won the kissing competition in Lima five years in a row easily, if that meant anything. 

Sure fuckboys and fuckgirls were kinda fun, especially when she got them in bed for the fucking part of things but a girl needed some romance in her life too. 

After the first few times, she was over them. No one could hold her interest and it seemed like she never held theirs. To them, she was always just stupid bimbo slut Brittany. Good for an easy lay but not for a relationship. 

Sure she knew she was hot but Brittany was beginning to wonder why she was never the girl who got flowers or love confessions and marriage proposals made to her. She was never the girl who got her happily ever after.  

All she wanted was a cowboy to ride her off into the sunset. 

“Tina, he just left me,” She sobbed into the phone as she heard Mike muttering something to his girlfriend in the background that vaguely sounded like him asking where Brittany was. “I’m at the Little Alien Inn!”

So now she was crying because she got ditched again. 

“Bad bitches don’t cry.” 

At least, that was what Tina told her when she and Mike stopped by to take her home but Brittany wasn’t so sure she was a bad bitch at that moment. 

Mike and Tina each grabbed one of her arms, all about dragging her out of the diner in her bra and skirt when she had started to take off her clothes and perform a strip show on top of a table as she often did. 

“You must think I’m such a mess.” Brittany sobbed, mascara running down her cheeks. Tina and Mike who were accustomed to picking up Brittany from sleazy bars and motels weren’t particularly surprised by any of this. 

“Oh Britt, it’s not you. It’s that vile idiot. You don’t need any of them! Just be your hot girl self. You’re an independent woman who don’t need no man or woman! Hot girl summer and all that.” 

Brittany wasn’t so sure about that at the moment. She felt like a codependent woman who was very much in need of a man or woman. 

“Maybe Room Temperature Girl Summer?” 

Tina shook her head, a long-suffering expression on her face, snorting out an incredulous, unladylike laugh as she passed another tissue to the blonde. She was so accustomed to Brittany’s oddball personality that she had come to expect comments like that from her. Apparently noticing that her tall, blonde friend was moping the night away on their couch with a pout on her face, she took pity on her. 

“Here’s an idea: make a game out of it. Make some fuckboy go all crazy for you next time and then you ditch them when you’ve had your fun and laugh in their face.” 

“Oh this, I’d pay to see.” Mike chimed in from across the room. 

A mischievous smile tugged at the corners of Brittany’s lips as she thought her friends were making a good point. 

That night, something hardened inside of her and changed for her.

Tina was right, it was time she had some more self-respect and Brittany began to realize how much more she was worth than just a quick lay in the backseat of someone’s car until they moved on to the next girl. 

——

She got her confidence back pretty quickly because if there was one thing about Brittany it was that she didn’t stay depressed for long.  

So the next week she was slinking around The Pussy Cat with feline-like confidence and agility, ignoring the men who gawked at her, hissing and cat-calling as she passed by. She didn’t have a care in the world. 

Who cared about girlfriends and boyfriends? She was just there to have fun with her friends. So that’s what she was going to do. 

She was having such a great time that she really did forget about her troubles.

Then she felt her burning gaze on her from across the room. The stranger in question was a Latina with black hair, equally dark eyes, glowing dark skin, and a very slim but toned build. Her long hair fell in perfectly tousled dark waves. 

She didn’t take her eyes off of Brittany once and had her jaw dropped as she took in the sight of the blonde. The blonde had never seen such a clear demonstration of “undressing someone with your eyes” in action.

Brittany couldn’t deny that the woman had this powerful, commanding aura about her. 

She paid absolutely no mind to it, humming to herself as she twirled around and rolled her body perfectly in time with the beat. Then she sauntered back to her friends, giggling to herself as she thought of something her cat had done the night before. 

Sugar tapped her on the shoulder. 

“Oh Britt, you’ve got another admirer. That one is checking you out so hard. She looks like she’s drooling. I can see her boner from over here… ” 

Brittany’s friends began to snicker obnoxiously. The blonde smirked and shrugged. It was super obvious that the painfully horny brunette was checking her out the entire time, muttering “Humina, humina,” but Brittany wasn’t bothered one way or another.

“Oh, okay. I just want to dance.” 

Tina, Sugar, Marley, and the others were gawking at her. Sugar eventually piped up.  

“Don’t you know who that is?! It’s Santana Lopez.”

“Who?”

“Brittany! How do you not know? She’s a celebrity! She was on Bad Girls Club.”

“Oh.”

“She’s openly lesbian too.”

“No duh. I could tell,” Brittany stated dryly, remembering how that woman had stared at her legs and ass. Come to think of it, Santana was still doing that. Brittany shook her head, rolling her eyes fondly at her friend. Sugar was always trying to matchmake her with someone and that girl knew everything about celebrities. She looked down at her nails, inspecting the pale pink polish on them while she knew Santana was checking her out again. “Uh, whatever. So not interested.” 

She definitely wasn’t looking for anyone that night but if she managed to torment them, then that was a bonus. Men and some women always seemed to assume that if Brittany was dancing, it meant she was looking for a partner. 

“What’s all that noise?” Brittany spoke up, hearing a bit of a commotion. “It’s kind of annoying.” 

It turned out that the woman who had been checking her out was being totally loud and obnoxious now. She laughed really loudly, banging her fist on the table and being a total show-off. She threw back drinks until she was visibly red in the face. Then she started to sing as she got up on the table, drawing a crowd until some short woman with a serious expression pulled her back down before she embarrassed herself. She clearly thought she was so desirable and hot. 

She probably thought that Brittany didn’t notice how she kept sneaking glances in her direction. A sly smirk came to Brittany’s lips. This woman was such a goofy dork and she was extremely obvious. Brittany had never seen someone who tried so, so hard and was so painfully lacking in self-awareness. 

It was almost cute. 

Brittany knew this woman’s type just from looking at her. She was also a little psychic. 

She could tell this stranger was such a stereotypical arrogant womanizer with an ego the size of a small planet and thought of women as nothing more than warm bodies. She was so vain, she probably looked at herself in every reflective surface she passed. She was so selfish and spoiled that she thought the world revolved around her. 

She was totally Brittany’s type. 

She didn’t need her though. She was done with playboys forever. 

At least that’s what she told herself when she followed her friends over to the bar. She taken a few sips from the strawberry daiquiri in her hand when she began to blink in confusion as a margarita was placed in front of her. 

“It’s from that lady over there. She sent this and she asked me to tell you that you’re stunning.” 

“Aw, that’s sweet. Tell her I’m so not interested.” Brittany quipped with a sassy flip of her long wavy hair. 

Brittany glanced over her shoulder to see Santana waving and giving her this smug smile that made these stupid, cute dimples deepen on both of her cheeks.

Tina and her other friends were just watching her with amusement as Brittany continued to ignore Santana. All of her friends clearly found this so hilarious, though they were supporting her in her decision to completely ignore all the perverts and fuckboys who were trying to get her. 

“Wow, Santana’s really going for it. Looks like someone’s dying for your attention.” Mike chuckled. 

“Ugh, here we go. I so don’t care. She’s just horny. Why do they always see a woman sitting alone and assume she wants a companion?” The sass was dripping from Brittany’s voice as she tossed her hair back over her shoulder and curled her lip, ignoring the drink Santana sent her. “Newsflash, no thanks.” 

Santana kept giving her the eye no matter how much Brittany made it clear that she wasn’t going to fall into her arms. Ugh, Brittany rolled her eyes with exasperation and amusement, couldn’t Ms. Egotistical take a hint?

Apparently not. 

“Oh don’t look now, here she comes. She got it bad.” Sugar snorted as everyone began to chuckle at the sight of Santana Lopez swaggering over with her shoulders thrown back.

Brittany had to hand it to her, the woman was the only one who had been brave enough to approach her like this all night. 

Too bad the blonde was so not in the mood. 

Brittany was feeling bitchy. She knew the routine by now. They all wanted to know her name, her number, her sign… Brittany was curious about whatever sleazy pick-up line Ms. Arrogant was going to give her and she didn’t disappoint. 

Santana had this stupid, cute cheesy smirk on her face and her teeth were gleaming white. 

She was so typical Hollywood sleaze.  

“Hi. You’re gorgeous,” Okay, she was starting off being a little charming with that opening line, Brittany had to admit but she just knew the sleaze would be coming next. “Dayum, Girl. Where’d you learn to dance like that? Who you dancing like that for looking all hot like that?”

Not for you, Jerk :) That’s for sure. 

“What I want to know is, what time them legs open?” 

Like I haven’t heard that one a million times before… 

It was so lame. Even though she was in stunned disbelief, Brittany couldn’t help but notice Santana now and she gave it back to her with a sassy comeback of her own. 

“Oh, is that supposed to be a pick up line?” 

Brittany was beginning to wonder if Santana had ever actually flirted with a woman before, far less managed to pick up one. There was a flash of lust in her dark eyes when Brittany said that and she looked as if she was about to combust on the spot. 

“So, you know, I’m on top of things. Would you like to be one of them?”

Brittany could barely hold back her laugh, cupping a hand over her mouth as she rolled her eyes. Santana continued to puff up her chest and peacock around her, as if she expected Brittany to be totally impressed. 

“Ooo, is it hot in here, or is it just you?”

She could not be for real. This was the great, powerful celebrity Santana Lopez her friends were in awe of? She really thought she was charming the dress off of Brittany with those corny lines.

Brittany couldn’t wait to tell Tina about this later. She knew her friend would be laughing about it forever. 

“Ooo, I’m in trouble.”

Santana as always, was unfazed by Brittany’s ice cold, dismissive attitude. The preppy blonde decided to tease her even more, getting close and poking her finger into Santana’s chest confidently. Brittany couldn’t deny that the way Santana’s eyebrows rose and her lips parted as if she was flustered by the blonde invading her personal space amused her to no end. 

“Oh that’s how it is, huh? What’s your name, Pretty Girl?” 

Anytime Brittany was snippy towards her, the woman looked at her with obvious arousal written all over her face. She was pushing back her dark hair, trying so, so hard to look all cool and suave but she had this stupid, goofy look of excitement on her face that made it difficult for Brittany not to start giggling. She had to cover her hand over her mouth as she laughed in her face. 

The more Brittany acted all aloof and mysterious, the more she turned on Ms. Egomaniac. She swore she saw the woman clenching her thighs together when Brittany gave another sassy response to her. 

Brittany had been one of the most popular cheerleaders at school and homecoming queen. She knew how to handle vain, uncouth Santana Lopez types. 

Except she had never met anyone quite as hot as Santana before. 

Now that she was so physically close to Santana, she couldn’t stop herself from checking the girl out, noticing that she was slightly shorter than her with a toned, slim build that the simple black dress she was wearing displayed so well. Brittany couldn’t help but notice the slight muscle tone in her arms and how radiant her brown skin was. 

Santana gave her another smug look, as if she could tell that Brittany liked what she saw. Whatever. If she thought Brittany was just going to give in to her, she had another thing coming. 

If there was one thing Brittany knew, it was flirting. 

She learned it straight from her blonde, buxom mother, the original harlot and heartbreaker of Lima in her day before she had settled down. If she wanted to, she could get this girl into bed, easy as ABC. 

Brittany didn’t even have to try and that’s exactly why she wasn’t gonna let her get what she wanted so easily. 

The blonde dancer totally knew the effect she had on her. It was so easy to rile the dark-haired woman up and as she beckoned her closer with a finger, Santana kept gazing at her lips, making it so obvious what she wanted. 

She leaned closer, knowing that Santana would feel her breathing against her neck and as she expected, there was a sharp, aroused intake of breath from the Latina.

She even closed her eyes, puckering her lips as if Brittany was going to kiss her. 

As if.

“My name is no. My sign is no. My number is no. You need to let it go.”

She couldn’t stop giggling at the sight of Santana frozen in place with her lips sticking out, clearly not expecting this turn of events as Brittany just sang that song to her. 

No kisses for you, Hot Shot, She smiled to herself. 

Talk about embarrassing. How was Ms. Big Shot Movie Star ever gonna recover from that one? 

Brittany was a professional dancer and she could easily outdo everyone in the club but that didn’t seem to stop Santana from trying to keep up with her. She began to dance beside her energetically as Temperature by Sean Paul played. 

“You’re cocky. That’s how you dance?” Brittany was in stunned disbelief yet again, amused by the way Santana was being so ridiculous. She was clearly trying so hard to impress her and it was having the opposite effect. Santana was being such a clown and people around them were starting to give them strange looks. 

“You like that, huh, Babe?” The woman was all up on her, her arm settling around her waist as she husked into her ear. “You want all up on this, don’t you? I’ll make you feel so good, Princess. Trust me. I’ll make you scream my name.” 

Santana’s voice was so hazy and raspy. Brittany felt heat rush to her face, right up her neck to her ears, shocked by what she heard… and kind of intrigued. Santana couldn’t really think Brittany would give in just from that locker room talk. She didn’t want Santana to see how affected she was by her comment but of course, Santana saw everything. 

Apparently the woman noticed the blush on Brittany’s face too and she was amused. 

“Is that so?” She challenged, making sure to flutter her eyelashes.

“You bet. I think we should get to know each other better. Preferably with way less clothes on.”

Was that the best Santana had? 

“Hmm, oh, you’d like that, wouldn’t you? What else?”

“Roses are red, violets are fine. You be a six and I’ll be a nine.”

Santana might have been the funniest person to ever exist. She couldn’t be for real. 

“Mm hm. Is that all?” 

The celebrity began to tell her all about what she wanted to do with her when she got her in bed, making her appreciation for Brittany’s ass obvious. She wasn’t expecting her to grind up on her like that. The feeling of Santana’s hips moving against hers and her husky voice against her ear made it kind of hard for her to remember that she wasn’t supposed to give in to her.

She was such a horny jerk and Brittany’s jaw dropped in disbelief at how crude she was being as the blush in her cheeks intensified.

Santana was just a little too excited, acting as if she was entitled to getting into Brittany’s pants and that just wouldn’t do. At least not until Brittany was ready for that. If she decided she wanted her. Brittany was gonna have to remind her to back off a little until she wined and dined her enough - if Brittany deigned to allow her to. 

She wagged a finger. 

“Nuh uh. I don’t think so.” 

She needed to extract herself from Santana’s arms. So she raised her knee the way she saw on a TV show about women defending themselves from muggers and got her right up in the area between her legs. 

Not in a fun way either. 

Santana’s eyes went comically wide in stunned disbelief and she took a tumble on her ass. 

“Did I do that? Oops! My Bad!” She giggled with faux-innocence, not meaning a word of it. 

Brittany walked back over to her friends victoriously as they clapped and cheered for her. In fact, almost the entire club had stopped to watch the whole spectacle as Santana struggled to regain her dignity. 

“Brittany, I am so proud of you. You are the ultimate boss, oh my God!” Tina congratulated her then turned back to her phone. “Santana Lopez getting clamslammed and kneed right in the vagina by a mystery woman is already trending on Twitter.” 

“You’re not leaving with her?” Sugar looked shocked when the blonde waltzed over, making her exit. Brittany not going home with someone, especially someone like Santana, was about as rare as a blue moon.  “This never happens. She’s just your type. She’s rich, super famous, good-looking, shallow, dumb…” 

“Not really. She’s gonna have to try harder if she wants all of this.” Brittany flipped her hair over her shoulder with complete confidence and sass, gesturing to the curves of her body. She knew Santana could hear her. Santana blinked at her stupidly a few times, apparently disoriented by her hotness. 

She turned just in time to see Santana limping over to her pathetically. 

Brittany was confused. Why was Santana gazing at her in fascination, as if Brittany was the most gorgeous, entrancing being she had ever encountered even though her groin and ego were in a world of hurt?

“What’s your name?”

Maybe it was because Santana was so cute but Brittany couldn’t help but flirt a little despite herself. Maybe she didn’t want their game to be over just yet. They were both sweaty and flushed, somewhat breathless from all the dancing. 

“You need to let it go,” She teased, watching Santana closely as the woman attempted to regain her composure and act like she was unaffected. “It’s Brittany.” 

____

That would be far from the last she saw of Ms. Can't Take No For An Answer, even if she had humiliated her. 

She had never met anyone quite as determined and persistent as Santana Lopez. 

Apparently, when the Empress of the Universe wanted something, she always got her way and she wasn’t accustomed to being told “No.” 

Apparently Santana was really into the whole prissy mean girl side of Brittany.

She was also the most obvious person on the face of the planet. Brittany snorted when Tina sent her a link to a new article. The headline was pretty interesting. 

Santana Lopez Dedicates New Hit Single to Mystery Blonde - Who is “Brittany from The Pussy Cat?”

A video of her giving Santana a swift knee upward to the vaginal area had gone viral as well. 

Even Santana’s hardcore fans were amused by it all. 

Brittany noticed that Santana had left a bunch of comments on her thirst traps, making it extremely clear what she thought of them. The internet was going crazy making fun of how lusty and obsessed Santana was being but that hadn’t seemed to deter the woman either, despite Brittany ignoring all of her attempts to hit on her. 

That Brittany S. Pierce must have some Grade A Prime Pussy for Santana to be simping this hard for her… 

“Jesus Christ, the thirst,” Tina chuckled as Mike, Marley and Sugar couldn’t stop giggling beside her on the couch in the blonde’s apartment when she showed them her phone screen. They read yet another private message the woman sent to Brittany that was strongly suggesting what she wanted to do with her. “Goddamn. She really wants you.” 

“She’s just horny for me. She’ll get over it.” 

I’m just another conquest for her… 

“Be honest, do you think she’s attractive?” Sugar asked, raising an eyebrow. “At all?” 

She had watched all of Santana’s scenes on Bad Girls Club several times, looked at a bunch of her magazine photoshoots - she figured she needed to do her research, after all - and she even loved her songs that flopped.  That didn’t mean anything though. Santana Lopez was just a silly pompous rich girl just like the rest of them. 

“I mean, if you’re into the whole disgruntled, awkward cat aesthetic maybe. Her upper lip kinda reminds me of a duck.” She deflected. 

Everyone laughed as she said this. 

“You definitely should stay away from her. I know Santana well and she’s a total arrogant jerk. She thinks of women as disposable objects.” 

“Oh, is she?” Brittany snorted sarcastically. “That’s a shocker. Don’t worry, Tina, believe me you don’t have to worry about me falling for her.” 

Brittany’s apartment was so very pink and decorated in such an eccentric way that most people were a little taken aback when they walked in for the first time.

Eventually, her entire living space became crowded with bouquets of pink flowers Santana had sent to her address. She sent ridiculously expensive jewellery, chocolates, and dresses. Brittany didn’t even know how she figured out all of Brittany’s favourite colours and things like that but she wasn’t about to get rid of them… she liked expensive gifts. 

She never responded to any of Santana’s gifts, knowing it would drive her insane. Santana got her number from Tina and Mike, who were their mutual friends. Truth be told, Tina had always found Santana annoying anyway and they were more like frenemies as that feeling was mutual, so she was happy to assist Brittany in her plan to troll Santana.

Brittany answered Santana’s calls just enough to toy with her and keep her guessing, then ignored her whenever she felt like it. 

It was all part of her plan. 

“What am I supposed to do with all of this stuff?” The blonde whined halfheartedly as Lord Tubbington knocked over the growing pile of chocolate boxes. 

“You could send it back if you really don’t want it.” Mike suggested with a shrug. 

“I would… but pink diamonds are really nice,” Brittany pouted. “I might need another dress too.”

“This almost sounds like one of those sugar daddy type of situations,” The man shook his head at her, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “I’m not surprised, since it’s you after all.” 

“Except, she won’t be getting any sugar.” Britt winked. Tina smirked at her in agreement, giving her a high five. 

“You are the queen of manipulation. You’re really gonna get this woman to spend herself bankrupt, aren’t you? Yes, Girl. I say, use all the power you have to your advantage. Stress that fuckgirl out. Make her work for it, Britt. Make her suffer!” 

Sugar, Marley and Jake fell silent, taken aback by the short, gothic woman. Mike glanced over with a nervous expression as he heard Tina’s words, followed by her evil cackle. 

“You’re torturing the shit out of her! I love it. Get it, Girl.” 

Brittany felt proud. 

“Hey, if she wants all this she’s gonna have to work for it.” 

“Hey, Britt, I think there’s someone at your door. Must be another delivery from Ms. Egomaniac.” Sugar chimed in. 

The tall blonde just shrugged, traipsing over and eventually returning with a new parcel. Brittany blushed reddish pink up to her ears, gasping at a new, skimpy lingerie set that she unwrapped. She held up the light blue, lacy lingerie as her friends began to wolf whistle jokingly and some of them made gagging noises. 

Against her better judgment, she answered Santana’s call when that familiar number flashed on her phone a few minutes later. 

“You’ve got a lot of nerve sending this,” She sniffed, trying to sound bitchy and cold as she told her off. “Do you really think that’s appropriate? You horny bastard.” 

Santana was laughing down the line. She was actually laughing, that cheeky bitch. 

“You like it, Babe? Gonna put it on and model it just for me, Querida?”

“I am not your Querida.” 

She did like the lingerie a lot but Santana didn’t need to know that. If her ego got any bigger it would probably explode. 

She hung up before Santana could answer. Deep down, she knew Santana would love that response even more. 

****Read the rest of this story on AO3

[minorisato]

if at all possible, please spare me the pain

slashers, dead by daylight / ghostmyers / wc: 843 / warnings: explicit s-lf h-rm, s-icidal thoughts, homicide, unhealthy coping mechanisms / notes: old vent fic

Danny just has this… habit.

He’s never been diagnosed, nor does he ever want to be, but he’s pretty sure it’s something like a personality disorder. Even in his own (very biased) opinion, he can admit he’s unstable by normal-person standards, and he has an anger problem, and he doesn’t care that he has an anger problem, which actually makes it a lot worse, in a roundabout way.

When it’s bad, he’ll stab something, preferably something that can die, and he’ll throw things, and slam doors, and he’ll flail and move and move, anything just to get it out of his system. When it’s really bad, he’ll cut himself, and imagine the anger flowing out with his blood. Then, of course, when it’s really, really bad–

 “Just once. Just once, please. I need to bleed it out,” he’d say, happily on his knees in front of Michael. “I need to bleed it out, the ones I give myself aren’t enough. Please, Michael, I know you can give me one good one.”

Michael, then, with his emotions as hard to discern as ever, would give him a great one. Danny would routinely wake up an hour or so later, new wound scarred over, hurting like hell. Then he’d lock himself into one of the many rooms of the Myers’ house and cry until he couldn’t anymore. This process could range from anywhere between fifteen minutes and two hours. Then he’d come out, smug and haughty, and pretend none of it ever happened in the first place.

Michael, of course, was a self-motivated man. Danny was too, so it’s not like he blamed the larger. Having an infinite amount of Danny’s to kill repeatedly– all while he was begging for it, he wanted it, wanted to die, like an addict– didn’t seem to bother him in any way.

Which always led Danny to question; what’s up with the crying and isolating? Both of them were getting what they wanted, but every single time, he’d end up sobbing until he puked, and then sobbing more. He was getting what he wanted, he was giving Michael what he wanted. His anger was gone, just replaced by soul-crushing sadness. Why? Why was he like this? Why did he get so overwhelmingly angry? Why did he need to die to get it all out? Why can’t he be fucking normal? Why did he even kill in the first place? Why is he so insistent on being unhappy?

He’d always ask himself these questions, curled in on himself, imagining a life where he actually could be normal– it was almost unfathomable, but the idea of a normal job, normal family, normal life, it tugged at his heartstrings. This, too, he’d beat himself up over. He chose this. He did it because it was the only thing that made him feel alive and he ran with it because it was a high like no other. He was well past the point of no return. There was no normalcy waiting for him.

Little cuts were never enough. Big cuts, stabs, too, were starting to not be enough.

Maybe if he was really nice, bargained with the Entity enough, she’d loosen her grip, and he could go, could die, for real this time–

A loud bang hit the door, and Danny jumped at the sudden noise. He didn’t answer, he couldn’t. He didn’t trust his own voice. Michael would go away eventually. After all, what did he care?

Another bang. Then another.

Danny stared, sniffling, as the door shook. Another.

Then the latch broke.

“Wait,” Danny’s throat let out, before the rest of him could catch up. Realization was very suddenly dawning on him that a wooden door would not stop a 6’7” man who’s favourite hobby is murder. “Wait, wait, wait, please don’t come in, please–”

But Michael is a self-motivated man, and he doesn’t stop when teen girls beg him, he doesn’t stop when nurses beg him, or survivors, or Danny. The shorter doesn’t have time to find where he threw his mask, doesn’t have time to cover his face at all, can’t gather himself together, as Michael Myers waits for no one.

Danny wants to yell at him, wants to curse him out, wants to demand solitude, he wasn’t done wallowing, but he doesn’t get a chance before he’s yanked backwards, yelping, pulled into Michael’s grip. Said grip is frighteningly tight, some imitation of a hug, of genuine intimacy. Danny’s still crying. He can feel his ribs bruising. He cries harder at the implication of Michael sparing him any care or thought.

Michael takes them to the floor like that, still holding Danny in that kind-of-hug. They’re cuddling. They’re cuddling, as though they’re an actual normal couple, as though Michael didn’t stab Danny through his chest less than two hours ago.

Between his sobs, Danny actually laughs. It’s awful. Everything is awful. There's something wrong with him, deeply, intrinsically, unfixable. There is no normalcy waiting for him.

He buries his face into Michael’s neck. This is close enough, for now.

[solhrafn]

I went Full-Fuji! (GFX One Year Review)

One year ago, I decided to ditch my Nikon DSLRs for a Fujifilm GFX 50R.

The GFX's sensor is larger than a full-frame sensor with a crop factor of 0.79

A little over a year ago, I still was using a few Nikon DSLRs to do just about anything. For portraits and landscape, I had a very respectable D810. Enough megapixels to provide some room for cropping and a decent dynamic range for most situations. For action and hobby-wildlife I had a D500. A durable mini-tank with performance that to this day would be hard to dismiss even in the light of mirrorless flagship innovation.

However, the question of my camera-future slowly crept into my mind. Was it time to change and upgrade into the Nikon Z system? Switching to a Z7 would indeed have been a sensible move, adapting older lenses while getting the sensor of the D850 in a smaller, cheaper body with an ecosystem of native lenses with the optical quality up to specs for the next decade. On paper and elsewhere, it should have been the obvious choice. Yet my answer to this question was a resounding "no" and I went against reason to set my sights on a Fujifilm GFX 50R. I took that model over the S because I enjoy the rangefinder form factor.

In hindsight, the smartest of all moves would probably have been to remain with what I had, adhering to the ancient photographic wisdom: "lenses are more important than cameras". My kits could have kept me satisfied for probably another 10 years if we are being honest. I could have stayed within the F mount ecosystem and could have taken advantage of its downright insane price drops to get top-of-the-line lenses for peanuts instead of selling the farm on a whim, however carefully considered it might have been.

These old and trusty Nikon DSLRs got sold off to finance the 50R

The truth is that after fifteen years of walking the beaten paths camera-wise, I wanted to shake things up. I longed for a change of pace. I felt confident enough in my practice to know what type of photography I would want to engage in for the foreseeable future. I also felt confident enough that I'd be able to answer the call of the occasional assignment using a camera system that would have a non-negligible amount of drawbacks. The challenge even seemed like a fun new variable to add to contracts. Thus, the choice I made for my photographic future has been one born out of love rather than made from a place of reason.

When I think of good photographic memories involving the process — how photography is approached with mind and body — I immediately have two very different ideas jumping to mind and each has an ideal type of tool that best suits it. Neither of these are about efficiency. Neither of these are about performance beside niche-performance, perhaps. But that, is more of an acquired taste and it also comes at a price, but we'll see about that later.

The first idea is an instinctive and spontaneous approach, form of feral and visceral active meditation, akin to Daido's rabid dog method; roaming the streets clear of thoughts and letting the subconscious take the helm. Shooting, shooting, shooting and discovering everything later. No plan, only image-taking. No clear framing, no image-reviewing, no judgement to pass, no threads to weave. Only arrange and make sense later, if there's any of that to find.

Results using the "rabid dog" method, using a Fujifilm X100, 2014

For this type of photography, the Fujifilm X100 was the tool that instantly clicked with me. The "poorman's Leica" is an apt way to describe what the X100 represented when it came out. I got the original 12mp camera in 2012 as a fun but capable toy to bring along my Nikon D700, until the shutter release button (which also is the on/off switch) broke off in 2020 after one power-up too many. I have since replaced it with a Fuji X-Pro 2 with the XF 18mm F2, 27mm F2.8 and 50mm F2 lenses. To this day, such small Fuji bodies are my tool of choice for this kind of photographic mood (and of course, for family pictures).

Fuji X100 later replaced by the X-Pro 2 as street photography go-to.

The second photographic process that I tend to naturally gravitate towards stems from my first year of photography school, during which all projects had to be done using film and would have us deal with the whole process (that is to say; shooting, developing, printing, framing, and displaying our work ourselves). It is with nostalgia that I look upon the memories from that time.

There sure is something inherently different in figuring out what to do with the exposures one has left on their film than being able to inconsequentially shoot within two hours three thousand pictures through which you can almost immediately browse. The latter is of course more practical and a welcome technological improvement, but the former brings an unhurried and deliberate focus that I find both refreshing and appealing.

When I think of my strongest recollection of touching the quintessence of the analog experience, the days of using my Mamiya 645 immediately come to mind. Such sluggish, heavy-as-a-couple-bricks box-machines compel one to being careful and purposeful every step of the way. I need that too.

Mamiya 645 Super, since sold to finance GF lenses.

I have for the longest of time considered getting a more serious medium format camera but some quick-math with the price of film, chemicals and photographic paper made me realize that digital medium format was actually much more worth the investment while most definitely retaining some of the core characteristics of its analog counterparts. My love for the film process couldn't hold up against all the advantages of going digital, especially when buying second-hand.

Using medium format always felt like journeying inwards. It has allowed me to spend long hours in daydreaming-states paradoxically laced with an acute awareness of my surroundings. When thinking about medium format, I can recall the soul-washing quality of some of the winds that swept my cheeks while I was standing next to the tripod waiting for the exposure of the 50iso film to finish.

States of contemplation. Another kind of active meditation?

Of course, any camera can provide this type of feeling, but of all of the digital cameras available, medium format is the one type that will weigh you down the most and dictate the pace you work at.

Telepanoramas created with the Fujifilm GFX 50R

Notice how these two ideas are almost the ends of a spectrum?

The first one is nervous and agitated, highly reactive, while the other is composed, meticulous and invites introspective fugue-states, yet they both share one vital element in the way that I approach them in that they take the practical considerations out of the picture to leave more space for what is going on within me.

The setting up of the camera or lack thereof becomes an excuse for something else. Maybe it isn't a surprise, that my adhd-ridden brain experiences this inexorable attraction for both these approaches. For they are in essence, two sides of the same coin, with each side matching different, specific and fluctuating needs.

Let's dive in!

After selling my DSLRs, I started looking for a good second-hand candidate. After a month or so, I found a barely used GFX 50R sold with a 50mm 3.5, a couple additional batteries and an L-bracket to boot. The price was rather attractive for the bundle, so it seemed like the time to take the leap. After a short but excruciating wait for the package to arrive, I finally was able to join the larger-than-35mm-sensor club.

How it started

My first few months with the camera had me immediately blown away by the difference in output. The higher resolution and the sensor's qualities made the (very much existing) noise hardly noticeable when downsized to small printing or screen-viewing sizes. What also immediately struck me, was the looks of the images the camera produced. Images taken with the GFX feel more "3D" to me. It is a very peculiar and hard to describe feeling. I suspect it is a combination of factors; the depth of field of the larger sensor and the very smooth transitions between what's in focus and what is not that it permits, the colour depth, and the quality of the optics. I've seen many Youtube reviews, read forum threads or been in discussions on Discord about GFX cameras where people (who more often than not don't own one) will maintain that these qualities don't exist at all. After a year in the system I can confidently state that they're wrong.

I can't really put my finger on what causes these differences as I am not as tech-savvy as I could be, but it is still clear as day. To use a pretty apt analogy, I would say that the difference between full-frame and (crop) medium format is akin to the difference between aps-c and full-frame cameras. Are they deal-breaking? Not necessarily. For some people they can be. Are they noticeable? Definitely. It is especially funny to me to see medium format cameras being dismissed by such a many full-frame shooter who at the same time, is constantly bashing aps-c sensors.

Don't you love to pixel-peep? Omnomnom (imagine with 102mp!)

This being said, I will always fully stand by the statement that full-frame cameras are the more sensible choice as they are better all-rounders by design. High-res cameras like Sony's A7RV or equivalent are also better high-iso performers than the aging IMX161 sensor that the GFX 50 series uses, which sees its operational limit at around 6400iso (but the GFX 100 would be another matter entirely). A top-tier full-frame camera is evidently more practical, lighter and cheaper without any deal-breaking image quality difference to what the medium format niche can offer. When all costs are factored in, the choice would seem self-evident. If you consider medium format, it should be understood that you know this before committing to any bigboy sensor. Or don't heed this and make people who buy second hand happy, as GFX gear loses almost one third of its value once it hits the second hand market (a consequence of too many people jumping on the medium format bandwagon only to realise — way too late — that it wasn't for them).

Are we cooking yet?

I need to talk about the GFX's files for a little bit; I'm a raw shooter only — which hopefully you'd have guessed — (in my opinion anyone buying into a medium format to shoot jpeg must have cognitive issues or too much money, or possibly both) and I have to say that when I opened the raw files to give the sliders their very first +100/-100 or +3/+4 EV from base iso (or any combination of these) I was utterly floored by how well the files could handle such an ungodly beating.

This isn't a joke, I promise.

This type of camera makes the slider memes come true, to a point where for the first few months, my ability to edit properly was severely impaired by the glee I experienced while pushing everything way too far. I believe it is not an uncommon symptom at the start of a medium format journey. It takes a while to come back from that and simply be able to tell yourself "ok here, maybe less dynamic range would be a good edit". I'm getting better at this as I consciously try to avoid overcooking.

Clean recovery? Can do!

On the image-taking side of things, the major change for me with regards to file-handling is that I'm almost systematically exposing for highlights now. Adding 3EV and boosting shadows in post when shooting at low iso is inconsequential in terms of image quality as there won't be any visible noise whatsoever on the output, unlike my aps-c cameras that will show noise even at base iso. Similarly to many other aspects medium format manages well, this is something I got used to very quickly.

To adapt or to not adapt, that was the question, here's my answer:

At first, I tried adapting my old Mamiya 645 lenses to the 50R. It was useful in the sense that it allowed me to enjoy different fields of view at no cost but it quickly felt like a plaster on a wooden leg. I'm not someone who enjoys the manual focusing as a default and I've grown more and more intolerant of the optical flaws of older lenses as time went by. I realised that it wasn't a viable long term solution for me and quickly chose to sell all my Mamiya cameras and lenses to finance native glass for the GFX.

My experience adapting? It was alright but not at all ideal.

Which lenses then?

Getting into the GFX system I promised myself I would make no compromise whatsoever on optical quality and directly aimed for the 250mm F4 (mainly for tele-landscapes) and 110mm F2 (mainly for portraits). The grind felt long but it really wasn't, as I managed to secure both lenses from the second hand market within 6 months. It is only later that I added the 35-70mm "kit" lens to my arsenal to fill the wide-angle gap I had. As I seldom feel the need to shoot wider than short-tele fields of views, this is more of a lens of convenience.

The difference between adapting older lenses and using native glass was night and day to me. Two things made this the better choice in my view: first, I've been actively seeking the "clinical" quality of modern optics. I do not care much for the "character" of older lenses especially not if the word is used to help one overlook a lens' unforgivable flaws. Second, while there sure are lenses worth adapting out there, this come at a cost for the adapting to be worth it (the cost of an AF-capable adapter and of course the cost of the lenses themselves) which I saw as a waste of my limited resources. I told myself I wasn't going to make compromises, remember?

One year after switching, I am now knee-deep into the system, having sold most of my Nikon gear as well as my Mamiya medium format film-cameras to acquire some of the incredibly hard to resist GF lenses.

After a year of transforming a heap of dormant gear and side-gig revenue into new lenses, I also noticed that the representation I had about the worth of money also changed radically when gear was concerned.

A little over a year ago, an XF lens priced 800€ definitely seemed like a steep investment I'd try to find alternative choices for. Nowadays, 800€ is a mere budget lens in my mind. Seeing the price tags of GF lenses doesn't make my head spin anymore and this is somewhat worrisome for the thrifty Dutchman living in the back of my brain.

With the announcement of the 500mm F5.6 lens being in development (a focal length I definitely miss from my Nikon days, I'm a sucker for ultra-telephoto landscape photography), I fear I will manage to push my monetary boundaries further back yet, which I will help achieve by selling my X-T3 video-oriented kit.

APS-C: you're dead to me.

An unforeseen consequence of my GFX switch was that my aps-c cameras were pretty much relegated to the bottom gear drawer and seldom used barring a few notable exceptions (such as a wedding gig) where the need for its autofocusing speed was greater than the need for image and file quality.

To reuse the analogy I made earlier; my X-Pro 2 and X-T3 have become to me what a micro-four-thirds camera would be to a full-frame camera user. Getting into Fujifilm's medium format system prompted me to think about how I use my cameras and to what end. The realisation that there is a clear split in my photographic approaches I evoked at the very beginning of this article is the result of that thought process.

Although I will sell my X-T3 because it feels superfluous and I want to stop my video gigs completely, (and because my need for GFX lens money is still great), I would never part with my X-Pro 2 nor the few XF lenses that I have as they serve a totally different purpose to that of the GFX's.

Having a compact, fast, discreet yet still capable camera that can be casually put into a pocket is an advantage that I would be a fool to part with. The X-Pro is a more practical choice for street-photography, documentary in less-than-favourable conditions, as well as for family pictures, when packing a brick of a camera and two bricks worth of lenses for a walk in the park in suboptimal weather would be met with a tired roll-eye from my spouse.

My dear X-Pro, I'm Never Ever Gonna Give You Up

Of course there have been many occasions for which I have chosen to take the challenge and went into these situations with the GFX. However, I wouldn't want the GFX to be the only option at my disposal in such cases.

For example, during the last wedding I shot, when the dining room got darker and the guests started moving around a lot (and dancing), the switch to aps-c cameras was absolutely necessary because of how difficult it was to consistently get acceptable results in poor light and with subjects making erratic movements. When you are held under a result-delivering imperative, you have to be able to honour it.

Packing a Fuji GF or Fuji X kit can be a slightly different experience

"Megapickles don't matter!"

This was an idea that I lived by just a few years ago. I changed my mind. I still believe that megapixels don't matter when you don't have them. Just like one should shoot with the camera one has / is able to afford. It doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things but all these technical niceties just make one's life more comfortable. Cropping, denoising through file reduction algorithms, or enjoying detail endlessly because one can, these are just the icing on the cake. I just happen to like my cakes with more icing than cake now.

Regarding resolution specifically, it's been another area in which there seems to be no possible coming back. Nowadays, every time a manufacturer announces a new camera and I discover they plan to fit it with a 24MP sensor I dismiss the information entirely. It doesn't register anymore. 32-36 is the new 24 in my mind now and it's sometimes difficult to come back from those expectations.

This being said I have no issue using lower resolution aps-c that I own and could perhaps even have fun with a X-Pro 1 because then the output quality wouldn't be my prime concern. It is only concerning new releases that my interest dips firmly for "low" MP cameras.

Did I tell you that medium format AF sucks?

Before I conclude this one-year review, let me hammer this point in with a two-handed mace; it can't be understated, especially for the GFX 50 series which uses contrast detection — the autofocus will throw you back to the early 2000s. Be ready to be stuck on single point, single AF mode because that's the only thing that will be consistent enough.

Then let's not forget other factors that add to the bad and make it worse; the shutter lag is half a second, the sensor readout speed is 1/4th of a second, and the time the shutter takes to clear the large sensor in combination with the camera's high resolution means you'll need higher shutter speeds in order to get rid of motion blur when shooting handheld (count about one stop faster than usual). Those would be valid reasons as to why a less niche camera system makes more sense for a lot of people.

The final comment:

Despite its sometimes dramatic drawbacks, I definitely have found the pleasure I sought when I originated this system switch. The change and the adapting my process is engaging and makes me think more about what I do, what I use, when and why. This is a win on its own.

All in all I feel like I am still at the very start of my journey though I've had the opportunity to test my GFX 50R in a wide array of situations in the past year (portrait, landscape, documentary) it seems like the way forward is clear and also opened for plunging deeper into this incredibly fun (but needlessly expensive) rabbit hole.

The upcoming 500mm, the prospect of finding an original GFX 100 (with its weirdly appealing tiltable EVF) are ideas that will — for the foreseeable future — definitely keep pulling me back in (and emptying my pockets).

Fun! Fun! Fun!

[fulfillingbineeds]

completely understand what you mean about the not being able to promise anything! but if you’d ever want to write about about Rudy’s powers and the relationship between the two Rudy’s, or mayhaps Rudy and Nathan actually meeting each other? I do think both of those are fun underexplored topics I’d love to see you handle. Looking forward to seeing any fics you publish in the future, I love your work and hope your burnout gets better 👍

I need to rewatch the Rudy seasons first before starting to write anything about him. (<evil excuse so I get to watch misfits for the bajillion time)

I do have a planned Nathan/Simon fic series that might come out in October (that I cannot post on Tumblr, wink, wink), and one of them includes a Rudy cameo.

I'm one of the firm believers that Nathan and Rudy would HATE each other, more from the former than the latter. Nathan wouldn't vibe with Rudy at first, and he is, of course, a dick to him. Rudy, at first, is friendly and cordial, but as Nathan acts like Nathan, the one-side beef becomes two-sided.  

I think it'd be funny to see the dynamic between them while they squabble and act petty to each other, but they also get along, but when they realize that they are getting along, they go back to hating each other.

In one of the tweets from the old official Nathan account, he mentioned that he wouldn't get along with a clone of himself ("If I could clone people I wouldnt clone myself. We wouldn't get on.") and we see in the show with the whole Alisha and Nathan parallels that they don't really like each other—more from Alisha than Nathan. They're too similar, especially in things they don't like about themselves. But we do see they can get along (2x5 I love youuu. We needed more Alisha and Nathan team-ups.), especially when it came to making fun of others.

So, my thoughts about Nathan's and Rudy's dynamic are based on that thought process. Rudy was brought in as Nathan's replacement, which is why a lot of people can't get with Rudy because he was a 'poor' replacement. But people don't see that; sure, Rudy is in the same position of comic relief as Nathan was, and they have similar hobbies, family issues, and personality traits, but they are very different characters. You can tell by just their humour: Nathan is more attacking others, singling out their insecurities and using it to his advantage. He finds it funny when he can rise out of someone. Rudy, on the other hand, is more of the opposite. They still share the odd and bizarre (more from Rudy), quick-witted (more from Nathan), and clever references to pop culture.  

Nathan would see certain things in Rudy that he's self-conscious about himself and be bitter about it. Especially when it comes to Rudy's power, I think he'd feel insecure that Rudy can get along well with these emotion-ish centred clones of himself, while if Nathan was in his position, he'd want to run away, as that's what he tends to do when it comes confronting his complicated feelings. (substance abuse, hurting them first before they hurt me, etc.)

But we also see that Rudy struggles with it too (probably the whole reason he got his power in the first place!)

Anyways- I'm not really sure I can be coherent with my jumbled thoughts, lol. But it really is an interesting idea to analyze. Rudy is a super complex character, and well, very entertaining to watch, lol.

Hopefully, I'll get some new work done and up soon (thanks for the compliments ;D). Especially keep an eye out for the misfits zine coming out in November ;)

[crispysnake]

I'm doin it:) ok yall here is a list of all the more obscure hobbies I think modern au Keyleth gets up to plus examples! goin under the cut cause it's gonna get a little long!

first of all she is an Eco Friendly Girl almost everything she makes or does is for repurposing and reusing other things:)

• Rebinding books! Keyleth gets almost all her books from second-hand stores so usually they're pretty beaten up and damaged, so she rebinds them and makes her own covers with old fabrics or sometimes patterned paper she feels fits the vibe more! I think for the twin's birthday, Keyleth found two copies of Elaina's favourite book, one she used to read to them all the time that eventually got harder and harder to find, and she rebounded them and added little touches on the cover so it was something even more personal to them:,) (Also Percy forged Keyleth her own personal book embosser and its one of her favourite things on the planet)

• I think this girl definitely learned how to cut glass. listen she is clumsy and tries to carry far too many things and once and often drops and breaks her cups. So she takes old glass bottles and cuts and sands them down to regular cups! on bigger ones like wine bottles she turns those into plant pots. I think she kept the wine and pop bottles from her and Vaxs first date and now those are her most treasured glasses. But she also over the months stole some of Grogs bottles, all of his favorite beers and ales, and turned those into a set of glasses for him:)

•Kind of hand in hand with the last one but I think for more recreation she also knows how to make and cut stained glass, they are hung up in almost every window in their home (Vax loves being up for the sunrises and sunsets cause it casts a whole lot of rainbows all over the walls and floors) for Pike she made a piece involving the Everlight colours to hang up on the window she prays under, and when Percy was having a particularly rough time, she made one for him where the centrepiece resembled the sun tree.

• ofc she knows how to embroider, she tries to make all her clothes last as long as possible, so usually when they get holes or rip, she patches them but embroiders a little flower or plant to cover up the stitching

• Keyleth definitely knows how to dry and press flowers, she loves being able to preserve that beauty, you just know she's talented at making bouquets that hold a whole lot of meaning, but DRIED flower bouquets are just so beautiful and she likes thinking that since all those flowers are preserved, that the meaning behind them stays preserved too. (in this au Vilya went missing and then presumed dead. so they still had a funeral for her. and keyleth visits regularly to replace the dried flower bouquets.)

• HANDMADE NOTEBOOKS. Keyleth does not like wasting paper, so she collects all her scraps, dilutes and blends them, presses them, makes her own covers, coils them, and creates them into something new:) Scanlan has his own handmade customized notebooks for all his songs, and eventually commissioned one for Kaylie too:)

•(BONUS) When Keyleth does eventually start going to therapy, she had yoga recommended to her a few times but it just didn't really work for her, she doesn't like her mind being that quiet and letting all her not pleasant thoughts run rampant. She still tries and does it most mornings to wake her body up and take deep breaths though. I think she just prefers having these hobbies as a form of expressive therapy etc, I'm not quite sure what I want her job to be in this au yet but yall this girl is a hard worker and afraid of failure, she definitely had an unhealthy work-life balance and needs these hobbies to have time for herself and her family.

OK THATS ALL I GOT FOR NOW, if anyone has literally any other ideas please lmk I would love to hear them! I will definitely be adding on to this when I think of more :)<3

[desidesidesi]

The first liveblogging of the excitement of The Box TM was getting out of control so I'm making a new post and sharing a new story.

So! My mother and her friends live in a poor backwater of Mississippi. Like we visited during Thanksgiving and the "City Square" which is the heart of the city was either cute, kitschy gift stores or buildings that are literal husks with caved in rooves. So they are permanently B O R E D and have picked up the art......... Of Dumpster Diving in the extremely rich college town north of them (not naming it cuz I don't wanna dox my mom or ruin their weird side hussle. @banahbanah you know where I'm talking about)

Apparently they heard tale that all the rich college kids and stores just throw out perfectly good furniture, clothing, anything under the sun at the end of the semester. Sure enough she's told me about a giant 65in TV that was "broken" (a 50$ repair got it working again) basically a new wardrobe, perfectly good food (Star Bucks throws away so much shit), Coach Bags, and knick-knacks galore!

This is all relevant because half of the stuff in The Box are goodies from one of her outings!

First pic!

In this picture (Professor Juniper for Scale) we have a Bento Box, a Tea Cup (which she worried would break but thankfully did not), and two different gift sets of tea (both thrown out well before their expi date) all gotten from the HomeGoods Dumpster in said rich college town.

Now, I know what you're thinking: Desi. Isn't this a little privileged and problematic that a bunch of Southern White Women can go around dumpster diving and basically not get in trouble with the police? And I say... Like, duh? But they kinda do a Robin Hood approach to their little operation and share with everyone in their friend group anything and everything they find! They're basically using their privilege to stick it to corporate America and even MORE privileged white people!

Also in this pictures are crystals from an old chandelier in my childhood room. Mom was replacing it and asked if I wanted it? I'm renting, I don't have any place to put it lol so I just said "Can I have the crystals to make Sun Catchers with?" She didn't quite get it, but she sent them anyway so yay!

And of course, my delicious Milex (powdered milk for those that don't know what the hell I'm talking about) 💖💖💖 I know I'm a weirdo for basically using it as a cereal additive by making things extra milk, but I fucking love it and it tastes of childhood. 💖 We have to get friends to "import" it from Honduras cuz the company that makes it doesn't sell online anywhere??? It's fucking wild how hard it is to find this stuff!!! Gotta ration better this time. I literally used the last bag she got me in a few weeks 😅

Also? Cute cows on the packaging!

And finally! The Purse-My-Aunt-Saw-And-Thought-I-Would-Appreciate-It-Best!

Look at this thing! It was "Made in Nepal" with "environmentally friendly products" and is bigger than my damn torso??? I can fit my full-sized sketch book in this dang thing lol! It's very... Hippy dippy lol. I definitely see why she got it for me 🤣 Will have to wear it around Colorado and see if I get any Crunchy Moms lusting after it.

BUT YES. I did an unboxing on Facebook Messenger with my mom and dad and it was silly fun. Hope this random hobby my mom has taken up nets me more random bullshit lol.

[paradoxiii]

At the moment, my stance on AI generated images/text is that they *could* be a good thing, in an ideal world. But they're pretty much just being used by selfish assholes.

First, I wanna mention that what I'm saying should apply to the AI generated "writing" as well, but for simplicity I'll just be talking about images.

If these generators worked off of art that the artists actively consented to being including, that would be a good start.

But also the idea of using these generators to completely replace artists, instead of tools to help make artists' processes easier, is particularly frustrating. It's incredibly disrespectful.

I think maybe, ideally, there could be one big database that these generators train on. Things in public domain. Things that artists themselves can submit if they wish to have their art included. CONSENT is the word here. There's a difference between someone studying another person's art style to try to mimic it (usually coming from being inspired by that person, fascinated by their art, it comes from love for the art) versus telling a program to make something but make it in a specific person's art style because they either don't want to spend money commissioning them or the artist is not taking commissions (usually coming from a sense of entitlement, and as much as I hate to say it, laziness).

And then, the whole shitty thing of replacing artists with these programs. There's a difference between technology replacing people in jobs that take a hard toll on their bodies, and technology replacing people in jobs that they actually want to be in. Of course, in a society without UBI and focused on making profit over helping people live their best lives, taking away any jobs from living breathing people is going to receive complaints. But taking away jobs from artists, who already don't make as much money as they should because art is viewed as something unnecessary, something that should just be a hobby or side gig, is like kicking someone while they're down.

I saw something about how the Spiderverse team used AI to help streamline the process. They trained it on their own works to do this (so they didn't steal from unconsenting artists) and it was a tool to help the process, not become the whole process. In this case, it's like using an electric mixer to mix ingredients you grew yourself to make baking a cake less strenuous, as opposed to having a robot steal ingredients from the store & baking the whole thing for you.

I would LOVE be to able to train an AI to make backgrounds for me that fit with whatever style I'm using for the characters. I hate drawing backgrounds, I love drawing characters. I often go to websites full of public domain images to find something to use as a background, but even then, I usually heavily edit it or even trace over it so that it blends in better with the character(s).

Using something like that Art Breeder site (which disclaimer: idk what DeepAI is trained on, so for all I know it could be stealing just as much as Midjourney and the like) to make faces for your characters is fun! It's a fun little thing to do, like using a picrew but more complex (at least with a picrew, you know the artist consented to you using the picrew).

On another note though... if you replace all artists with AI, what is left to train them on? Yeah, you have all previously made art, but you don't get any new styles, new ideas. You're just making an inhuman machine recycle old things. While I believe us humans should worry too much about originality (thank you dear creative writing professor who made us read "Steal Like An Artist" by Austin Kleon, as well as just theatre as whole), it's because we are living breathing thinking feeling human beings who are impacted by everything we experience & carry it all with us. An AI program is not that. It just does whatever you explicitly tell it to do. No thoughts or experiences, just input & output.

[tuliptic]

How to move on from breakup? And how to Stop overthinking?

First of all, I’m sorry that you have to go through this and I’m proud of you for finding help and going through this all.

Next, I may not be the right person to ask these cuz I’m uhhhhh I have not been in a relationship for like almost 10 years lmAO.

Anyways, to get back to you. I’d suggest picking up a new hobby or an old hobby first. Distract yourself by trying new things or going back to your past passion. For example, I’ve reconnected with my old friends after my breakup. Or me starting this blog to move on from my crush. I created this blog with a namecard since uhhh September? Or so? And I’ve not touched it until December. But once I started, I’m slowly investing my time and energy in it. And it’s now a part of me. I won’t say I’ve completely moved on from it, as it takes time. So be kind to yourself. Let yourself to take the time you need to move on. I think that your support circle is also important so I hope you have a great one who will be able to help you through this time of difficulty and heartache.

Now. To overthinking. I would say redirecting your energy to something else. But you must need to recognize the pattern first, to know and acknowledge that you’re overthinking. You need to be conscious about it before you can do something about it. Cuz once you start overthinking, you’ll continue to feed your energy into it until you can’t hold back anymore. Which is why you need to recognize it first, know how and when does it come in. Once you know it, then you can work around it. I’d suggest:

Let yourself overthink but give it a time limit. Let’s say, 15 minutes. Once that 15 minutes is up, do something else to redirect your brain away. Crosswords puzzle, sudoku, rubiks cube, etc. Something that keeps your brain occupied.

Journaling. I find that journaling helps a lot. By writing down your thoughts, you will be able to reflect back on what you’ve written and to find patterns of your thought process. From there, you’d be able to find out what are your core beliefs, what exactly it is that makes you hung from the past, and how you’re gonna find a replacement or create something anew.

I hope these helped. Do drop by in my inbox if you’d like a chat or smth. Take care.

[scrumpledorph-writes]

Koben’s Biggest Fan (A Seventeen Year Old Nerd)

I

Packed up just about everything I own, rather not take the chance on any looters or squatters finding it. Huxley gave me a strongbox and key for the valuables – I can’t imagine anything other than the credits would be at risk, but the security is appreciated. Guess all that’s left to do is go meet his son.

Figure if he knows me from security footage he’ll mostly recognize the armor. Fine by me, changing out of it would be a hassle. His room’s at the very back of the manor, I suppose he likes his privacy. Even if he’s young he’s still a criminal, should make sure to announce my presence – not catch a reflexive pistol bolt. ‘Jaxon, can I come in?’ ‘Yeah, sure, whatever.’

Covered windows, poor ventilation, dim lighting; a far cry from how his father styles his space. Now how do I introduce myself? I doubt my name’s been pinned down on any of those holovids he’s watched, and I’ve never had a fan before. Maybe he can take the lead once he recognizes me. ‘Your father told me you liked my work, could you turn around so we can speak properly?’

‘Yeah sure, whate- no way, are you serious?! You’re not just one of his goons in a costume he had whipped up, are you?!’ ‘I don’t have any way to prove that.’ ‘Oh shit you are, that’s just what you’d say! I’m Jaxon, but you already knew that I guess. I’d seen footage of you slaughtering that gang over in Dunton, by the way that was some of your best work – the way you crashed through that wall and towered over him at the end was an absolute masterpiece – but I never thought I’d actually get to meet you! Unless you were hired to kill me, of course.’ This feels wrong, somehow.

I’m no stranger to violence, but I don’t do it for fun. He sounds like a voyeur. ‘He hired me to-’ ‘Oh oh oh, can I touch your plating?! How is it always in perfect condition after every vid, do you have a dedicated mechanic? Can I meet them too?’ Seems like I should let him get this out of his system before I put him through boot camp. I can take an arm plate off.

‘There’s a layer of thermal weave under each plate, it absorbs most of the heat from blaster bolts. I check it after every mission and replace any spent fabric as needed. I also have a protective paint I reapply to the plates whenever it wears thin that prevents corrosion, rust, and other everyday weathering. Sometimes I need to take them to a specialist to remove dents, and I needed a new breastplate machined once, but they’re very durable when taken proper care of.’ It is nice to talk to someone else about this stuff, equipment maintenance is the most important part of the job.

‘No way that’s so cool, you can just swap the plates out whenever they get worn down. I thought they were just one big welded chassis, but I guess whoever built you must have wanted you to last forever! Where are your circuits though, is this fabric some sort of camouflage for your neural harness?’ What the hell is he talking about?

‘I’m not a droid, I’m a human.’ ‘What?! No fucking way, you’re kidding, can you just hold on a sec while I get my holovid recorder and say that again? That debate’s been raging for years on the forum.’ ‘There’s a forum for talking about me?’ This is getting weird.

‘Not just you specifically, it’s for fans of all kinds of bounty hunting footage! The section for outlaw bounty killers is a lot smaller, so topics get pretty insular and retreaded fairly often. Obviously I’ve always argued that you were a droid, because I mean, come on, the way you carry yourself is so exacting and precise, and you’re so big and strong, that you couldn’t blame me, right? Umm, you’re not mad at me, are you?’ ‘This sounds inconsequential, so no.’ Hopefully putting him through some real combat training will make this hobby less appealing.

‘Oh, phew, glad to hear it. I’ve kind of spent a lot of time theory crafting about your origins, do you want to hear?’ This feels like it could go on all day. ‘Maybe later. Your father hired me to train you. If you take well to it, we can talk more about this at the end of the day.’ Not used to reward based motivation, but Imperial punishments probably won’t go over well here.

‘Oh, in that case, yes sir!’ ‘I’m a woman.’ ‘You are? But I thought...wow. Okay, yes ma’am! I’ve never done anything like this, what should we do first?’ He looks so emaciated his arms wouldn’t even need leverage to snap, and I’ve never seen a chair with such well worn grooves. ‘Physical conditioning – we’ll get a feel for your limits, then start pushing them. I’ve been told this place has a gym, meet me there. Change into something more breathable, I’m going to do the same.’

It’s been years since I’ve had to exercise with anybody else, and these clothes I bought don’t leave as much surface area uncovered as I’d like – but it would be irresponsible to meet him in my underwear. He’s already obsessed with me, and Seline said that I have an attractive body. If anybody can be considered an authority on the subject it would be a prostitute. With how little exercise he gets, he might have a heart attack. I can double layer my casual shirt and roll the pant legs up as far as they can go, that should suffice.

II

‘W-wow, hey there ma’am. Could I get your name, by the way? It would be huge if you told me what it was, that’s another thing that people debate on the forums.’ He’s having a hard time looking me in the eye, his are darting all over the room. My first name shouldn’t hurt, a gesture of trust for a future partnership. ‘Koben.’ ‘Aww, seriously? Uhh, sorry, that’s a nice name, it’s just that that’s one of the going theories I didn’t believe.’ I’m actually starting to get curious about all this, how deep do these discussions go?

‘What was your theory? Tell me while we warm up with some stretches, copy my movements.’ Basic aerobics so he doesn’t end up in a bacta tank doing the harder exercises. ‘Oh, you actually want to know? It’s kinda stupid, don’t worry about it.’ ‘Let me rephrase: as your instructor, I order you to tell me. And straighten your knees.’

‘Yes ma’am – Koben! Well, you don’t exactly talk while you’re on the job, I get it, you don’t want to give anybody clues. Not like the glory chasing bounty hunters who only take big flashy jobs so they can get a toy deal.’ Who’d want toys of a bounty hunter? If you’re going to be enthralled by violence, at least do it yourself. ‘I killed one of those yesterday. Stay focused, and switch legs.’

He seems distracted, far in excess of just his storytelling. ‘Anyway, most of the time when other people in your videos refer to you, they call you “trooper”. Working off my droid theory at the time, I figured that must have been short for a designation – Tr00p3r. In hindsight it was a bit of a shitty theory, I never could find a droid designation that matched that name, but the guy who kept saying it was just such an asshole about it that admitting he was right would have driven me up the wall.’ This forum is starting to sound like it has too much information on me.

‘How many people use this forum?’ ‘Well the main forum has thousands of posters, but if you mean how many people talk about you, it’s maybe a couple dozen at the most. I keep the place curated, anybody who shit talks you catches a lifetime ban.’ That’s a low enough number to track down, but also a low enough number to be unlikely to accomplish anything with that information. I won’t worry about it, if he’s their most powerful member then they’re harmless.

‘Noted, thank you. Let’s continue in silence for now.’ He’s having a hard time doing basic stretches, even the academy conscripts were better off than this. It would help if he could watch my demonstration longer than five seconds. I’ll bring it up after the set as something to work on tomorrow.

This is kind of nice. He really seems to appreciate my work. It felt uncomfortable at first knowing that there were eyes on me, but the only part anybody else ever appreciated about it was the results. Knowing there are people who can recognize all the training that went into being able to do it almost makes me feel like I owe it to them to keep going. Then again, with this payout I likely won’t need to work for a while. Losing a few fans is worth taking some time to relax.

‘Koben, can we please take a break? My arms feel like they’re on fire.’ He’d have gotten the rod for that in the academy, but I need to temper my expectations. There were plenty of washouts, but I don’t get paid if he quits. ‘Fine. You barely managing that gives me a good grasp on your physical abilities anyway. That was the more important part.’ Let’s go grab a drink.

This water is good. Is it fresh? Most of what I’ve bought on this planet has been reprocessed, has a chemical taste to it, but this tastes pure. He doesn’t seem to appreciate it. ‘There’s no use drinking that much at a time, your body won’t process it. You’ll just end up wasting it.’ ‘It’s water, we can drink as much of it as we need.’ Definitely spoiled by a life of luxury. ‘On desert planets like this, my squad used to get attacked for our water rations. Appreciate it.’ ‘Yes Koben.’ I should find out what his problem was during the workout.

‘You seemed to be having a hard time watching my demonstration.’ ‘Oh, uhh, yeah, sorry, I’m just not used to keeping eye contact with folks is all, I spend so much time online.’ Deflection. A nervous tone. It’s better to get rid of any obstacles now. ‘You looked me in the visor with no difficulty.’ ‘Well, I mean, that’s a visor, y’know? That’s different. I mean, c’mon, I thought I was talking to a droid, not a...’ I think I can piece together where this is going, but making him say it is the only way to drag him over this hill. ‘Finish that sentence.’

‘A really hot babe...’ That’s what I thought. This is awkward for me, but it must be a hundred times worse for him. ‘You have permission to speak freely about me. We’ll be spending the next week together, so we should get any difficulties like this out of the way now. No use wasting your father’s credits on ineffective training.’ ‘Well when you were in the armor you were just kind of a vaguely human shaped blob, nothing weird about that even when you said you were a woman, but then to go from that to this, like, immediately with no warning – like if you’d showed up wearing lighter armor I would have had time to get used to it, y’know? But you went from a faceless genderless droid suit to a muscle girl pinup poster in no time flat, that’s just not fair!’ This is getting somewhat endearing. I used to feel this way about a few of the disciplinarians.

‘I considered this before meeting you in the gym, and thought I took sufficient steps to mitigate it. I don’t consider my attire sexual – and I know this is going to keep being awkward, but could you describe specifically what about my presentation comes across that way?’ Now I’m starting to feel bad for pressing him, but this really needs to get taken care of if we’re going to be able to work together.

‘Well, I mean, okay, sorry – I didn’t mean to call you a pinup model. But, it’s just, there’s a lot of nuance to it that’s really hard to convey, and the fact that you didn’t even try makes it even hotter.’ ‘I’m willing to listen as long as it takes to solve this. Embarrassment is the least arduous thing I’ll be putting you through.’ ‘That, come on! That’s an innuendo, don’t say stuff like that!’ How could he possibly misconstrue that as sexual? That was a borderline threat.

‘I was referring to training. Knife fighting, blaster handling, and basic unarmed combat are all foundational to my work, and your father wants you to learn them.’ ‘Okay that’s – just say what you mean. I’m not dumb, I know that obviously there’s no way for there to ever...be anything between us – like it’ll never happen, but that doesn’t stop my mind from wandering when you leave a statement open ended like that. You must think I’m just a creepy little fucking freak, don’t you?’ I’ve been getting better at being emotional lately, but this is going to really test my skills. It helps that he reminds me of myself when I was his age, under all the training.

‘No. I understand exactly how you feel.’ ‘What, how? You’re so stony and focused, no shot you ever felt like this about anybody.’ That hurts a little. ‘I’m going to tell you a story, but only if you promise not to tell your forum. It’s personal.’ ‘Sure, you’ve already given me like ten times as much info as we managed to scrape together ourselves.’ ‘When I was in the Imperial Storm Trooper Academy-’ ‘You were a Storm Trooper? That makes a lot of sense actually. Sorry, that’s another thing we debate about, I’ll try not to interrupt again.’ What part of my life haven’t they dissected at this point?

‘When I was just starting, they used to discipline me for my accent. They said it was unbecoming of a Storm Trooper, because a representative of the Empire needed to sound clear and confident.’ I’ve never told anybody about this, almost can’t believe I am now. ‘What the fuck, that’s horrible!’ ‘For minor infractions it was just my instructor, but those minor infractions built up into major infractions. Major infractions were carried out by a dedicated disciplinarian.’ Hopefully me embarrassing myself will make him feel more comfortable. Talking about this feels good, somehow. Like someone taking a supply pack off my shoulders.

‘You seem to have a healthy sexual appetite, so imagine what this did to a fifteen year old boy’s brain.’ ‘You said you’re a woman though.’ Oh right, not everybody grows up the way I did. ‘I was a boy, who became a soldier, who became a woman, who became an outlaw. Regardless; how do you think you would react if an older woman, about the age I am now, in a skintight Imperial Black uniform locked you in a stockade and whipped you across the back with a crop?’ He doesn’t even need to answer, I can see him picturing it. I’m laughing. I guess this is all pretty absurd, why not laugh about it?

‘Holy shit I think I’d bust on the spot!’ ‘I don’t know what you mean when you say “bust”, do you mean-’ ‘Don’t say it, but the horniest interpretation you can think of is the right one.’ Dialects change so strangely. ‘Anyway, that’s – I mean damn, for one thing that’s awful, I’m sorry to hear it. But also, like on the other hand – holy shit. Why the hell do they need to go around conquering planets, the Empire could fund all the projects in the galaxy if they just got into the porn industry.’ He really is starting to sound like some of my old foul mouthed squadmates. The fun ones.

‘I think I’d have done a lot worse at that career than at being a soldier. The point is, I would think about that for days after it was done. We lived in barracks with a rigorously regimented schedule, so I never had an opportunity to-’ I still don’t think we’re familiar enough for me to say those words out loud yet.

‘Yeah, I getcha. So, uhh, and let me know if this is me reading it wrong – but are you saying you’re okay with me practically drooling over you? Because, I mean, like, that’s totally doable. I was looking away to try to be polite because otherwise I’d just have been thinking about, well – y’know; like, the whole workout.’ At least he knows when to be honest with an authority figure. ‘You’ve managed to maintain eye contact throughout this whole conversation. Have you been doing that this entire time?’

‘No. No, now that you mention it I haven’t. I guess, I dunno, now that we’re talking you feel less like a celebrity and more just like a person. A person who went through some really fucked up shit, by the way, just want to reiterate that part. But, uhh, yeah, I don’t really talk to people much, and women even less, so I guess – sorry for being weird about it.’ Not used to accepting apologies without reprimanding someone.

‘Well, if you ever need to be weird about it again, let me set a guideline so we can stop talking about this and get back to your training: I don’t encourage it, and I’ll certainly never participate in it, but whatever actions you take that don’t involve me and that I’m left unaware of; I have no say in. Do you understand?’ ‘Yeah, crystal clear. I’ll, uhh, well – I certainly won’t talk about anything I may or may not hypothetically do to relieve any theoretical awkward feelings that arise due to any potential opinions I have about any parts of your body.’ He’s a funny kid, not sure if he’s doing it on purpose or not. Huxley should cut him some slack.

‘With that many qualifiers you communicated almost nothing at all. You’d make a great officer. Now that we’ve got that out of the way, our break is over. You’ve had enough time to recover from your warmup, time to start the real workout.’ ‘Fuuuuck.’

[ducknotinarow]

so what are the raphs doing for the caseys/yvonne for valentines day?

First I wish you a pleasant Valentines day!

Kay i wanna answer before work uwu cause im biased and I adore the ships uwu also tagging @aflockoffeathers cause their muses duh uwu

Going in order of verse is my habit so thats how I will answer.

87: Raph and Casey are a pretty new couple at this time in writing. Raph's aware Casey is kind of a shy guy he thinks it's adorable though. But he still would like to do so something nice because well hes a bit of a romantic himself. So how can he do something nice for Casey, that give them privacy but can still be a bit of big deal? But not too big? A nice dinner date might work? So he learned how to make a pizza from Mikey Pepperoni and peppers. he tries to make it into a heart. He finds a nice roof top of an old abandoned building some fair lights and candles for the mood lighting. Hes a bit shy himself but hopes casey fine for just eatting together instead of going after law breakers? his gift? he got Casey a nice metal bat uwu wood ones break and hes not sure how he keeps replacing them u-u

2003: Casey loves hockey and well lets be honest Raph has hang ups on what all he can do for Casey considering hes a mutant turtle and all. But damn he wants to do something for Casey but expressing those emotions can be hard for Raph. So whats something he can do only he can for Casey well he hopes. One treat Casey the way he feels they should be he's played music for Casey before but maybe he can do more? I feel Raph struggles with words on his own actions is where he shines so with little music skill he has he writes a song for Casey to play for them. It might make Raph uncomfortable a bit but hes willing to put up with that to do something nice for Casey.

07: Raph dose drop his guard a lot more because of their break up. So he makes a far bigger deal of the day hes showering Casey with love they wake up to breakfast in bed, to Raph gifting his a red rose. Cause he gave Casey one when he first told them he loved them. They might go out for a ride on their bikes maybe they go to central park seeing how thats where they befriended each other. They star gaze and Raph just dose anything he can to let Casey know he loves them. Openly speaking soft sharing soft kisses with them. his gift to Casey? its fucking Cheesy as hell but he got some help he records that song he worte them years ago so Casey can have it.

2012: One of the first dates Raph and Casey went on was the movies, it was kind of awful cause well Raph can't be down on the lot of course. TO casey it was awful cause he should have brought more blankets a pillows so Raph wouldn't be cold sure they turned it around and just made out but to Raph Casey dose a lot for him and he dose nothing. He wants the night to be about Casey much as he can. So Raph "borrows" a projector from Donnie, grabs a sheet and finds an old empty lot. Gets a air mattress for comfort makes sure they have blankets and pillows so Casey wont need to prep anything. He gets Casey a Rose with a little note he not good with words himself but he tries his best his pome sucks but he tried! He got snacks and some monster flicks, horror flicks and few romcons whatever Casey wanna watch. As a gift he was able make a patch of Casey's hockey mack and hood like when hes fighting. Maybe they can sew it on a hoodie or something he just thought it be nice and a use of one hobby raphs not open about.

Rise: Raph gets Yvoone the nicest flower he got her like 12 batches of Roses! red and purple sorry April he made you help im sure XD He dresses up best he could just for her. And plans the day just to be about her since he tends to have to divide his attention. They go to run of the mill for Dinner, they cuddle at her place to watch movies when it gets darker they go up to the surface and stargaze. its not fancy it's not meant to be fancy because he knows Yvoone just wants to be with him. His gift? he sucks at this but April got him one ofe those for kids sewing kits of a bear pattern and tried to make her a tiny little bear. The stitching is a bit of a mess but he made it for her because she likes to sew and it got a pacifier cause hes saying he wanna build a family with his girlwife ;3;