#i just Spiral completely

[the-girl-who-cried-wolf]

Okay so why did nobody told me about the new 5sos song older????? Why do I just get to find out about it???? but for real emma I have just listened to it for the first time and I'm losing my shit, I am going insane. I don't even know where to begin!!!! The lyrics (How dare they????) Luke's voice in addition to sierra's????? The pianooooooo!! I'll need some time to process, probably listen to it couple of times more, then send you my thoughts. I don't wanna get older, I am going to cry. Anyway, allow me to go insane in your inbox I'm sorry but the feeling of listening to this song for the first time is indescribable. Feeling like this:

mais i am so delighted by this, pls DO go insane in my inbox <33 i would love love LOVE to hear all your thoughts on older!!! it really is one of those songs that u need to sit down and just properly Listen To for a few hours, at least, just to try and comprehend the meaning and magnitude of those amazing lyrics (especially paired with the piano, ur so right i was going ~feral~ over that when i first heard it). this was one of those songs that they dropped in the middle of the night for me (yay! i love time zones!), so i woke up and had to deal with this song at first thing in the morning, which predictably did not go too well. (literally could not stop crying i was such a fucking mess)

there's something so incredibly powerful and beautiful abt luke and sierra's voices together, idk exactly what it is but they just go really well together?? they sound lovely together and they just ARE lovely together and i could literally start crying rn if i think abt all this too much so im gonna stop now but THANK YOU SM FOR THIS!!!!!!! i love hearing from you!!!! pls feel free to share any thoughts you have i would be beyond happy to talk with you!!!!

[ew-selfish-art]

DP x DC AU: Danny desperately wants to find the explosion guy. Tim is really good at covering his tracks... he didn't account for ghosts.

The explosions make it onto TV as purported terror activity and most people haven't heard of that part of the world much less ever given a second thought to care about it. The only real reason it gets reported on has something to do with the Justice League and... Danny knows too much.

He's been in training for Clockwork's court (which he's suspicious of- feels like kingly duty bullshit- but Danny is playing along out of curiosity for now) and he's learned a lot about how the living and non-living worlds collide. That means learning about CW's usual suspects- one of which just happened to have a ton of bases around the area Danny was seeing on the news.

It didn't take long for Danny to try to piece together that whoever blew up Nanda Parbat was trying to fuck with the League of Shadows, and was doing it successfully. Less green portals in the world the better, same goes for assassins. But it gets Danny thinking... Maybe he can employ similar tactics on the GIW Bases that keep spawning on the edges of Amity Park. It would at least set them back while he and his friends navigated the help line desk to request Justice League intervention. None of them can leave Amity Park, so outreach is going to have to be creative.

So Danny figures he'll just find the guy. Call up some ghosts who were there, or er, came from there and get a profile and track him down. But the ghosts keep saying it was The Detective. Annoying!

Danny goes full conspiracy theory, gets Tucker and Sam involved, and begrudgingly asks Wes Weston his thoughts.

He hadn't expected Wes to garble out a thirty minute presentation (that had 100 more slides left to go before he cut it off) about how Batman totally trained with a cult and so did his kids. Danny kind of rolled his eyes but... hey, new avenue of searching in the Infinite Realms at least.

The ghosts confirm that Bombs is for sure not Batman's MO- But maybe his second kid would know? The second kid was already brought back to life though, so no way to easily reach him... Danny starts to realize that this might be the work of a Robin now. Wasn't the red one known for solving cold cases? (Sam provides this information- its a social faux pas to not know hero gossip at Gotham Galas- everything she's learned is against her will).

It all comes to a head when Danny goes about the hard task of opening a portal for the guy to come through at just the right time, explain the infinite realms so he doesn't panic and then describe what the fuck was going on with the GIW. It takes months, just over a full year, of random (educated guesses) portal generating- Finally, Red Robin drops into the land of the dead.

"So, you're the guy I've got to talk to about explosions right?" Danny enthusiastically asks.

Tim thinks he's died and landed in the after life following 56 hours of being awake and plummeting off the side of a building into a Lazarus pool. Nothing makes sense about the kid in front of him.

"Yeah, I got a guy for munitions." Tim answers cooly.

"How do you feel about secretly sanctioned government operations that violate protected rights?"

"Gotta get rid of 'em some how. Need me to point you in the right direction?" This might as well be happening.

[unfortunatelyevent]

thinking about essek thelyss "my entire life goal is and has always been the search for knowledge, the uncovery of mysteries, and I'll do it before everyone one way or another, no matter what I have to do, no matter the cost, but meeting you turned my life around in such a way that I would turn away the opportunity to uncover the greatest time mystery of all that's right in front of me and fix every mistake I made, just by the mere possibility that changing any of the choices I made would take you from me, nothing would make me give away any of the moments I had and will have with you.... unless it's for you, then I would do it in a heart beat" and going just a little bit more insane

[tardxsblues]

[pearlcaddy]

LOCKWOOD & CO. 1.05

[dittolicous]

"anti-zosans just dont get it! the appeal IS that they hate each other!"

me, a zosan shipper:

[gasstationpopcorn]

[souporsaladnatural]

Honesty Castiel's arc still feels so incomplete to me. Yes he got to confess to Dean and tell him how good and loved he is, which is huge for him. I don't want to downplay the significance of that and how much it meant to Cas. But what about the fact that he died doing the same thing he's always done by sacrificing himself? What about how he never learned to open up about his problems and to let his family help him because he still didn't want to burden them, which is why no one ever knew about his deal with The Empty? What about how he never really understood and accepted how much he was loved and wanted? I mean admittedly I'm still only in season 13, so I'm sure there's so many details and nuances I'm missing here, but idk. Even outside of reuniting with dean his character growth just doesn't feel done. I mean Dean dying the way he always thought he would, young on a hunt with no chance of a happy ending, is horrible and unsatisfying and I hate it. I don't see why Cas dying how HE always thought he would, happily self sacrificed at the altar of Dean Winchester with no chance of a happy ending, is much better.

[tennessoui]

Director's commentary about Bail in Foolproof Follhardy, who just wanted to attend a nice victory party and now has Sith + Obikin throwing heads and feelings all over the place.

[director's commentary ask box game!]

oh hell yeah you know what bail organa suffered the most out of everyone in the entire fic!! he was kidnapped and then abandoned on a park bench??? his own kidnapping wasn't about him!!

and so director's cut, this is a bail scene that i imagined for the fic but never included but. dark fierce unhinged and heartbroken master skywalker shows up in bail's office one day while he and obi-wan are not speaking during the interlude chapter.

he's completely unannounced, no meeting on the calendar, and he's like. why were you talking to obi-wan kenobi on the balcony during the victory celebration.

and bail is like what??? also why were you on the balcony during the victory celebration???? i never asked but that was perfect timing and weird!

and master skywalker is like. answer the question. what did you want. from him.

and bail is like what???

and master skywalker is like. you said you were going to proposition him. it's important that you tell me what your proposition was.

and bail is like your vibes are more rancid than the sith that literally tried to kill me i just wanted to offer him a position as a jedi liaison in my office once he becomes a jed knight. why?? did you think i wanted to ? what, fuck him?

and master skywalker, who thinks everyone wants to fuck padawan kenobi, is like no!! it's just that proposition is a very weighted word and honestly it came at a very bad time and you're MARRIED and no one should be propositioning him cause he's just gonna use you and chew you up and break your heart and if you were propositioning him i would have to kill you because it's just a very bad time emotionally for me

[seventh-fantasy]

okay... idk at all if this has been discussed or that I'm just stating the obvious. I'm posting any way to get more feedback.

so. can we be sure that the last boat scene even happened (in the way we saw it at least)

yeah the letter was delivered to the intended recipients. the letter also did say 李相夷绝笔 lit. the final writing by li xiangyi. there's a brief exchange between him and the assumed "boatman" asking him where he was going. and we see he spat blood while writing yeah but:

llh/lxy's eyesight had been failing for some time.

Professional Letter Writers are a thing in the past in service to people who can't write their own letters (idk enough to verify the historical accuracy in this specific context though)

what has been bugging me since forever is the manner of speech of the letter. yeah it's different from their everyday speech, but that's actually perfectly fine since this is A Letter so I'm good with it being more formal. but... there's something I just can't quite pinpoint. especially with the use of the 君 jun pronoun by llh/lxy to refer to dfs when there could be other pronouns with less connotations of intimacy (and scholarly/imperial court system) implied and still conveyed cordiality, marking a shift in their relationship. (I'm not well versed with wuxia as a genre enough to know what are the conventions. someone else who does can say something though.)

whatever these put together means (eg. he may not have written the letter personally, or he wrote it in a different situation from what we saw, etc etc.) alongside:

this scene existed only as part of a visualisation as the letter content is revealed to the audience (or assumed to be fdb reading the letter to dfs & guests of the wedding spectators of the duel)

the boat lxy/llh jumped on is not the same as the one he was writing the letter on - the boatman is also not on it despite the conversation at the beginning, but lxy/llh's dressing and hairpin are the same as the ones before he jumped. (the boatman delivered the letter so he's real though.)

also as @wonderfulnonsense happened to have just pointed out in the tags left in my other post: it's in fact the same boat he took to go fight dfs at donghai 10 years ago. (edit: or maybe it isn't? as pointed out by anon.)

if we viewed whatever we perceived in this scene as imaginary (not what actually happened), then the reading of it being a metaphor for lxy/llh being on his way to enlightenment just makes sense. (the boat being a carrier on his spiritual transformations.) especially when you consider that 彼岸 the other shore is another concept in buddhism to represent enlightenment, alongside the motif of lotuses. (credits to @markiafc for the buddhism reading - edit: mark's meta here) and then, consider the beach ending... yeah.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

ah yes! the joys of executive dysfunction and something being Fundamentally Broken In Your Braincase!

[yokoyas]

power coming to love two humans despite originally believing they all deserve to die and aki coming to love two devils despite originally hating them and thinking it was impossible for him to care about one and denji who toes the line between the two coming to love aki and power like siblings despite his history of being abused by men and seeking validation through sexual/romantic relationships with women. and denji turning down a vacation to take care of power and aki trying to keep them from having to fight the gun devil and them going with aki to visit his family’s grave and lightening the mood for him and trying to cook him dinner and power asking denji to find her even though she won’t know him and to love her until she’s her again anyway i hate this manga for making me sob hysterically multiple times.

[minweber]

Me, with two different Tavs, mocking Orin with the fact that Bhaal and Sarevok don't care about her and have both betrayed her: ha-ha, get fucked lobster woman, shouldn't have done all the murders

Me, with Durge, after practically no new information about her character has been added, but Durge's story has reframed her as the unwanted child, the always-second-best, looked down upon and despised by everyone whose approval she desperately sought her entire life because they created her to do so, while the framing of two of them as siblings creates the implication that they are of the same foundation, coming from the same place and following the same course up until the point when, through what was essentially a random chance, one that she never got, one of them was thrust upon a path to possible freedom and redemption - a path that inevitably leads them to crushing her as the very entities that set those fates in motion cheer on: oh.

[pumpkinrootbeer]

I need a haymitch prequel book not because I need to see his games in detail, even though I absolutely do, but because I need to hear his petty delusional absolutely batshit internal monologue. I have to know what's going on inside that crazy head.

[viric-dreams]

Right, some more coherently-articulated Elias/Nicholas thoughts.

Not all that many people actually know his first name. To his face, he's Lieutenant Roberts, and occasionally simply Lieutenant to the few with whom he's on friendlier terms. The Commodore* is the only person who calls him Elias (something that hasn't changed since he'd joined on as a cabin boy pre-Fall). Anyone who overhears this would not dare try to do the same. And absolutely no one in his life now knows his birth name. He barely remembers it himself it's been so long since he's thought about that part of his life. *The Commodore's insisted that Elias call him Guy, but he absolutely refuses. It feels fundamentally wrong to him. The Commodore shrugged it off decades ago.

Behind his back, he's disparagingly called The Commodore's Shadow. This is significantly more insulting to a Sequencer than it would be to an ordinary Londoner's ears. It would take a certain degree of bravery to call him that, however, even out of earshot, because the last time Elias got wind of the nickname... it did not end well for the man in question.

Mr Nite is not so fussed about formality and would be amenable to switching to first names, primarily because it means that he's finally cultivated a relationship close enough to someone to reach that level of familiarity.

Even before the Dawn Machine, Elias had a very intense personality. When he's settled on a goal he has an almost single-minded drive to achieve it, and is perfectly willing to break as many eggs as he needs in the process. Even if he's being friendly and polite with you, that general intensity still lurks somewhere beneath the surface, and many find him unsettling as a result.

When sociability fails (and it often does), Elias will turn to force. Whereas it initially started as a defense mechanism, it now serves him rather well in getting his way. His dreaded reputation precedes him on Grand Geode, doing a lot of the work for him, thus he's happy to fall back on it as the path of least resistance.

As a result he hasn't really had any friends throughout his life. In the early days establishing Zelo's Town he'd befriended a fellow seaman. Before their relationship had much time to get off the ground, however, the seaman was killed in a scouting expedition. Several other potential friendships had petered out in their early stages when it became clear to them how important to Elias climbing up the ranks is and that when push comes to shove what he's willing to do to get there. Although he's not self-aware enough to notice it, he now has a tendency to sabotage his interpersonal relationships before they can get to the stage where someone he's emotionally invested in rejects him. He tells himself he's fine with it. People don't need to like him, they just need to respect him.

He's not any sort of exceptional leader, but very much competent and efficient. When the Commodore gives an order, he will find a way to see it carried out. He does have a good sense for when something is out of his wheelhouse, and will not hesitate to outsource to the appropriate subordinate.

Nicholas is not a separate personality or anything in that vein. He's fundamentally the same man, just with a lot of the context missing. He does not remember Elias' formative experiences of being othered and the complete rejection of himself in the name of assimilation and belonging, and having only experienced the Neath, a significantly more open place, he does not know what a lot of that shame feels like. That said, had the first person to find him outside of Benthic College been a Sequencer, he could've very well been almost the same Elias all over again.

Even though the Neath is a relatively diverse place, the fact that Elias' formative years were grounded in becoming the Empire's model subject has left its marks deep within him. He'd worked hard to pull out all traces of foreignness from his English, and has very little tolerance for anyone unable (or as he sees it, simply unwilling) to do the same. To him, at best they're too foolish to make life easier for themselves, and at worst too obstinate.

Spending his teenage and young adult years in a homosocial environment**, had made him slow to the uptake that his interest in men was unusual. The eventual realisation, and the fact that this interest extended into the romantic, however, horrified him. But much like his origins, he shoved this peculiarity to the back of his mind, so that he could continue to present as the poster child of the Imperial Ideal. Occasional cruising does not count in his mind. That's completely different. Everyone does that on occasion when they're lonely. That entirely doesn't count. **the Navy of 1899 is a good deal more diverse than when he'd first joined, but change was gradual.

Due to all of these factors, Nicholas is on something of reverse journey of self-discovery, albeit in a far more accepting environment. This isn't to say that the Navy hasn't also adapted to a degree with the time and location, but as far as Elias' sense of norms and acceptability is concerned the damage has already been done.

Lacking Elias' memories of difference being something worthy of punishment, Nicholas is far more likely to seek attention or affirmation for his accomplishments. He approaches goals with that same intensity, but will not shy away from a bit of flair if it gets him noticed and his efforts appreciated.

[imminent-danger-came]

IVE ONLY SEEN ONE PERSON POINT THIS OUT BUT MK TRIES TO PUNCH MACAQUE DISGUISED AS WUKONG BEFORE HE EVEN REALIZES ITS WUKONG. I CAN FEEL THE MK AND SWK FIGHT IN MY BONES. Also can you imagine with like that one art post Mei asks MK who HE wants to be, not a reflection of somebody, not the Monkie Kid, not the Harbringer of Chaos and HE REPLIES WITH HIS REAL NAME I WOULD GO INSANE

I'm like. 85% sure that person was me afasdfafsd. I know I've mentioned it before somewhere!

Because it's like, MK feels extremely abandoned and hurt by Wukong during s2. MK's line of "Fine! Then just leave! At least my friends will never abandon me!" in 2x01 Sleep Bug is VERY telling, and it also makes me sob when put together with 3x10 The Samadhi Fire:

MK: "NO! Mei is my best friend—I'd never abandon her when she needs me! We're heroes! It's what we do!"

And 4x02 New Adventures:

MK: “You don’t know! We’d risk it for sure! I won’t abandon them when they need us.”

MK's own low self-worth combined with Wukong's tendency to leave in the worst way possible, which was only further exacerbated by the Lady Bone Demon's manipulation.

And I think MK's experiences and feelings throughout s2 made him resolve to never make his friends feel abandoned.

But of course, since this is Lego Monkie Kid, it's more interesting than just that—because MK leaves at the end of s4. It was out of fear, sure, but so was Wukong leaving in s2 and at the end of s3. MK does exactly what he set out not to do, making the same mistakes his mentor has, literally going to isolate himself on Flower Fruit Mountain for an undetermined amount of time.

It's things like this that make the question of "Who is MK" so intriguing, because that's who MK want's to be. He want's to be himself. But who is that person?

Is MK just like Wukong? Is he a harbinger of chaos? Is he just a noodle delivery boy? Is he Monkie Kid? What if you remove all those labels? What's left? What is he?

(Plus the whole "I just want to be me—to be MK!" "Yeah well...we all know where that leads." interaction between MK and the curse in 4x07)

And now that we've thrown MK's mysterious past and ominous future into the mix, we are in for a FULL on identity crisis spiral next season.

And well, when it comes down to it, MK was willing and ready to fight Wukong in s2. The lmk writers are fantastic at paying off several arcs all at the same time (see all of 3x10, which literally had the culmination of Mei's, MK's, Wukong's, and Macaque's arcs all in one. It's fucking phenomenal), and this is partly due to the time constraints of the show as a whole, but it's also just damn good writing. MK's past, his identity, the hurt he's experienced across every season—that's all going to come to a head. I also imagine it's going to happen right along side Mei, Wukong, and Macaque's arcs once again, because that's just how this show do. It do insane shit.

I also happen to be a believer in "Samadhi Fire Part 3", in which we get another 3x10 and 4x08 parallel to round it all up, and I am waiting, WAITING, for Mei to repeat MK's words back at him:

“Mei! You have to stop. I know you’re upset, and that’s okay! I know what it’s like to have a power you don’t know how to control—to feel like the fate of the world is in your hands and you have no idea what to do! But you always have my back, and help me through it. We, will figure this out! Together!” (3x10 The Samadhi Fire)

((Which, MK himself is repeating Mei's words back at her, with "But we're going to figure this out." I NEED A POSITIVE FEEDBACK FRIEND LOOP BABY))

But yeah. I'M WAITING MAN. WE HAVE THE SAME BONE FEELINGS.