#i just fuckin.... ugh ugh ugh i hate it so much oh my god

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

[cw: abuse apologism, ableism both anti-autistic and anti-NPD, metaphorical sensory torture, physical and emotional abuse, child abuse, sibling and parental abuse.]

ivan and adam's dynamic is sticky to dive into because boyyyy howdy is the idea of 'mutual abuse' one to approach with the sensitivity gloves On, and ivan definitely becomes physically and verbally/emotionally abusive toward adam after the coma...

...but even ignoring the tip-of-the-iceberg red flags for adam having abused ivan when they were younger, i'm realizing the more i look at it that adam's behavior toward him is also deeply emotionally abusive. and not in an 'abuse victim with no power in the situation looking for any opportunity to get away with potshots against their abuser, even when it's below the belt' way. it's abusive in a 'constantly looking for opportunities to shove an autistic's hands into Unbearable Bad Textures in situations where they can't resist or get away, and will face humiliation and social punishment--and likely further sensory torture--for trying' way.

(to be more specific, while i don't doubt that ivan is also autistic, by the above i mean that he very blatantly has NPD, and adam does the equivalent.)

this isn't reserved for when they're out of earshot of the general, either. adam does it in extraordinarily nasty manner in front of them both, and not only does the general not express disapproval, he takes adam's side. adam is, again, not having to dodge around a dynamic where their father will favor ivan over him if conflict and/or abuse gets involved; if anything, ivan is the one who waits until they're out of his sight to be nasty to adam.

which is, you know, characteristic of some kinds of abuse; not letting him off the hook there. but of the two, adam is the one we see brazenly and openly get away with abusive behavior toward ivan, despite the general supposedly favoring him. andrakkus loses his shit when adam indicates the idea of ivan is less than perfect while he's not around, but when it comes to how adam treats him the general does not protect him--express any kind of care for his physical or emotional wellbeing at all--ever.

if anything, the general gets cold and nasty toward ivan when ivan is a dick toward adam in front of him without disguising it behind faux-concern, or doesn't do things for him that he was told to. even just neutrally saying 'forgive me for speaking out of turn, but i'm not sure [adam] is up to this' almost gets him punched on the spot, which the general barely restrains himself from; whereas adam has to REALLY go over the line for what the general thinks is unacceptable--to the point of outright defector rhetoric--to get hit in the face. regardless of whether and how much of a regular occurrence it might have been before the coma, he has to push HARD for it to happen afterward, during the period of time where ivan is being abusive.

the books try to play it off like ivan's the one with all the power over adam, who can do and get away with whatever he wants; but it is shown consistently, over and over, to be the exact opposite. praising ivan and elevating him above adam is always something the general does to hurt adam directly. ivan does not actually benefit from the general's 'favor' that we see, ever, except for getting a medal and a party, until he's finally promoted when the general thinks adam is dead. he has no agency when it comes to adam unless it's behind the general's back, or in a situation where his method of doing things is judged more effective for the mission.

like. insulting adam constantly, and choosing him to do drills with so he can beat him up, is abusive. (assuming adam did not have a choice in the latter, which isn't stated but seems like they're trying to imply.) he had the choice not to do those things. it's not okay.

but it's fucking skeezy as shit that the books try to make you root for adam as the underdog in this dynamic, who's Kind of Mean to His Abuser but It's Justified to Find Little Opportunities to Fight Back Where He Can; because if we're going to play by those rules, it's ivan who is clearly lashing out at an abuser he has very little power over outside of a couple pockets of agency he can find.

like. this isn't even going into how adam's ableist abuse of him is part of a pattern where he's good at seeking out, and then taking advantage of, neurodivergence to abuse and manipulate people. that's a post of its own probably, or a reblog in this thread. but god damn does it make my skin crawl that these books expect you to cheer for--with--an abuser forcing their autistic victim's hands into sandpaper while they're not allowed to pull away or scream.

[dredshirtroberts]

it is not slacking off to write or create it is not slacking off to do things that are fun i am not slacking off or procrastinating right now i'm allowed to do things i enjoy doing for fun including playing games and writing and such

[bangcakes]

.

[mediumgayitalian]

prev

———

Hades’ favourite thing to rant about is how much his family forgets about and sidelines him. Nico has literally never once given the lecture his full attention, because why the fresh fuck would he subject himself to that, but he discovers, lying facedown on the floor of Cabin Three, that he must have internalised enough of it to remember some key points.

He is loathe to admit it, but Father is right. How come the Poseidon cabin floors are so nice and comfortable? The floor of Cabin Thirteen sucks. Whenever he has Floor Time in his own cabin, he gets bruised and cold. Injustice.

“Could you suffer quieter? I’m trying to study.”

“Shut up, Percy.”

“I’m not the one groaning in misery.”

“Shut up, Percy.”

Percy sighs heavily. There’s a loud thud as he snaps his textbook shut, and the creak of mattress springs as he shifts.

“You’re so fuckin’ irritating, you know that?”

“Coming from you,” Nico says indignantly, pushing up to glare at him. Percy makes a face back. “I am here, having a crisis, being vulnerable in front of you —”

“Oh my gods.”

“— like you suggested, to rebuild our tenuous relationship —”

“I wish the prophecy had killed me. Either one, I’m not picky.”

“— and you are studying! Nose in a book! You hate reading! You are doing this just to spite me!”

“I am doing this to pass my classes,” Percy snips. “Someone should send you to public school. You need to experience that particular level of hell.”

“Experienced hell already, thanks. Don’t need a redo.”

“Tartarus references don’t shut me up, Zombie Boy. I’ve been there too.”

“Ugh.”

Percy rolls his eyes, turning back to his textbook. Nico contemplates rolling back on the floor to Ruminate and Think (after the second failure in a row he has a much to think about, like what the fuck is he supposed to do, should he even fucking bother, is he doomed to life without love, etc, etc) but finds himself, instead, sitting upright. Watching his — friend. Watching his heavy frown, listening to the bit-back curses and the crinkle of pages when he holds the book too tightly.

He’s moody, today. Sullen. Ate his breakfast in silence and stomped off to the sword fighting arena, raising hurricane downpour around the open theatre to deter anyone from joining him. Coincidentally, Annabeth has not been seen all day.

“Are you okay?” Nico asks quietly.

Percy shrugs, glancing over then glancing quickly away. “Fine.”

“I mean. You flooded half the camp. So.”

“Just drop it, Nico. If you’re going to stay in here, be quiet.”

Nico bites back the automatic, scathing retort. Be quiet, Nicolò! Lalalalala! Don’t tell me what to do! Ugh! I hate having a little brother! Yeah, well, I hate you too!

A quick, cut-off choking sound cuts through his thoughts. He looks up, startled, to find Percy’s face red, to find him swiping angrily at his cheeks.

“Woah,” he murmurs, climbing hastily upright. He ignores the loud chanting in his brain telling him to leave, the discomfort swirling in his stomach at seeing someone cry, seeing another man cry, instead hovering awkwardly. Percy shrugs off the hand he touches hesitantly to his shoulder, and Nico holds it there, suspended, in between and outstretched.

“I’m fine. Leave me alone.”

Nico hesitates. Of all people, he…nobody wants Nico around, when they’re —whatever Percy is. Upset. The only thing he can probably do is make it worse.

But what can he do? Leave him? Get Annabeth? Jason? None of it seems right. Instead he stands, frozen, hand still half-outstretched, eyes wide.

“You can —” He clears his throat. “Um. Did something happen?”

Percy shrugs. His eyes remain glued resolutely to his textbook, although the pages are wet and warped.

“Cause you can tell me, you know. I won’t — tell anyone. Or anything.”

Gods, he is so far out of his depth. Could Kampe come back and attack? That would be easier to deal with. Nico could handle that.

“I don’t —” the pages of the textbook crinkle under Percy’s grip — “it’s fucking stupid, is what it is.”

Hovering is not the right call. He knows that much. He scans the cabin, evaluating his options — sitting back on the floor feels like a bad plan. He doesn’t think any kind of touch would be welcomed, nor is he entirely comfortable in giving it. He doesn’t want to crowd. He doesn’t want to seem too distant.

Slowly, carefully gauging Percy’s reaction, he sits on the bed, across from him. He leaves the textbook between them, letting Percy keep pretending to read it, and tucks his legs up under his knees. He fiddles absentmindedly with his ring, chewing his lip every time Percy sniffles.

“Why’s it stupid?”

Percy shrugs again. Nico resists the urge to shake him. How does anyone deal with this shit? What the hell is he even supposed to do? He’s not Jason. He’s not Annabeth. Hell, he’s not Will, who seems to read emotions intuitively, who seems to know exactly what to do when someone is scared, when someone is upset. Even when someone is angry. He tries to imagine Will, in his position. Sitting across from a crying Percy Jackson, saviour of the world. Yesterday, one of the younger kids had tripped and scraped half the skin off their arm on the basketball court. Will had been there with a soft smile and gentle, glowing hands, speaking quietly and cracking small jokes until the kid was laughing again. Nico tries to imagine that here, soft words and lighthearted jokes. It doesn’t seem right. Would he — touch Percy’s wrist, like he did with Clarisse? Drag the fight right out of him?

Is Percy even angry? Nico has seen him angry before. Murderous. Fuming.

He’s never seen him cry.

Percy’s voice is like palms scraping hard over sharp gravel stones. “I made Annabeth cry this morning.”

The way he says it makes it hard for Nico to actually understand his words. His tone of voice is — volatile, is the best way he can describe it. Loathing. Based on the curling self-hatred dripping from the sentence Nico would assume he’d tried to kill her — he says I made her cry like he doesn’t deserve to live for it. Like he’s hoping to be punished.

“That happens,” Nico says. He swallows. “When you — love people.”

He and Bianca made each other cry a lot. He just never — stopped, never gave her half a second. Sometimes she looked at him and he knew she wanted to hit him. She never did. But he knew and she knew he knew and sometimes it would well up in her eyes, and she would lock herself in the bathroom of their room and turn on the sink and cry and cry and cry. And it ached something nasty in the cavity of his chest.

Percy sneers at his hands, flexing his fingers. “People who love you don’t make you cry. That’s just — hurting. That’s people who hurt everyone around them.”

Nico frowns. “That’s not true.”

“It is,” he says venomously. “I’m supposed to be — I’m supposed to protect her. I’m supposed to keep her safe, keep her from people who cause her pain.”

“People like you?”

Percy nods.

Nico drags his teeth over his bottom lip. He thinks of bleeding fingers clinging to a tiny shaft of rock, thinks of dangerous green eyes, hard voices; thinks of a thick web clinging to a broken ankle and an abyss. Thinks of promises and oaths and choosing. Thinks of falling. Thinks of letting go.

“People who want to harm Annabeth do not jump into the Pit for her.”

The pages of Percy’s textbook have started to dry. The ink has bled, dark splotches in perfect circles. The fountain bubbles gently behind them, mattress creaking under shifting legs.

“You don’t understand what I —” He pauses, swallowing. “Did, down there.”

“D’you hurt her?”

“…I scared her.”

“Oh, well — Christ, Percy! Is that really what this — brooding is about?” He scoffs. “No shit you scared her!”

“…What?”

Percy looks at him, wide-eyed. Nico rolls his eyes.

“Aw, when you were fighting for your life in the place meant to tear your essence into atoms, did you do things that make you question your personhood? Your morals?”

“I —”

“Of course you did, dumbass! Of course you —” he takes a breath, trying to organize the jumble of thoughts in his brain — “of course the physical manifestation of darkness and distortion made you act differently than you would usually, Percy. Of course it — affected you. Gods. Of course you’re struggling.” He flicks Percy’s knee, looking at him with exaggerated exasperation. “Use your brain, why don’t you.”

A small smile quirks the corners of Percy’s mouth, although it fades as quickly as it comes. He wipes his face with his sleeve, breath shuddering.

“She didn’t scare me, though.”

“Not even once?”

“Not in the same way,” Percy admits. “I was scared, once, when I looked at her. In the death mist. But that wasn’t — her, you know? She could never scare me.”

“I mean,” Nico wrinkles his nose, trying to articulate, “I think that’s kind of abnormal?”

Percy tilts his head.

“I just mean that you have a very high threshold, Percy. For…what you’ll tolerate from people you care about.”

“Everyone has that.”

“Not in the same way you do.” He taps his knuckles, considering. “Tell me the truth — if Annabeth stabbed someone to death in front of you, in total cold blood, would you help her hide the body?”

“Yes,” he says immediately. He shrinks, a little. “Oh.”

Nico rushes to assure, placing a fleeting touch on his wrist. “It’s not necessarily a bad thing. I don’t think. It’s just —” He shrugs. “I’m used to scaring people, too. I don’t mean to. I don’t understand it. I don’t understand what I — do, it’s not intentional.”

Percy opens his mouth, but Nico stumbles on.

“But you’re not — a monster, Percy, gods. No one thinks you’re a monster. Especially not Annabeth.”

Percy wiggles his finger under his watch strap, turning it tightly around his wrist, cutting off the circulation. Nico watches but doesn’t say anything.

“You’re not, either.”

Nico blinks. “Huh?”

“A monster,” he explains. “You’re not, either.”

“Oh.” Nico shrugs. “Thanks, I guess.”

“No, I mean it, dude, I — look. Listen.” Percy sighs. “You got baggage. I put some of it on you. I’m sorry.”

Hands around his — throat — angry, angry eyes — harder — bruising — you promised! you promised! you promised!

“It’s fine.” A pause. “I did shit to you, too.”

“It’s not fine. And I know you did. We can still —”

He doesn’t finish his sentence. He sighs again, a long, defeated sound, and curls in on himself.

“One day you’ll forgive yourself,” Nico murmurs. “One day I’ll — me too, I guess. Me and you.”

Percy smiles tiredly. “And we’ll be okay?”

“No. You’ll still be annoying.”

He snorts. “Whatever. Drama queen.”

“Oh, I’m the drama queen, Mr. I Don’t Deserve To Be Loved.”

Percy snorts. He turns back to his textbook, fiddling with the dried page, and snorts again, trying to duck his head. Nico bites the corner of his mouth, hard. Percy glances up again, and Nico meets his eyes, and they —

Gods, they’re bad at this.

But suddenly Percy can’t choke back his laughter, and it’s wheezing and self-deprecating and still kind of teary and Nico is laughing, too, because thank the gods that shit is over. Percy’s red-cheeked and Nico is red-cheeked and neither of them are going to look at each other for a week, Nico’s sure, but for now he can roll his eyes at Percy’s melodrama and dodge his embarrassed shoving, and it’s fine.

“You should talk to Annabeth,” Nico suggests, when the giggling has toned down.

Percy picks at the torn-up skin around his nails. “Probably.”

“Are you going to?”

“Why were you lying on the floor?” Percy asks instead. It is the least subtle subject change of all time, but Nico takes it as the hint it is and drops the subject. It’s not his business, anyway. They’ll talk. He knows Annabeth better than to think she’ll let it fester, at least.

“Oh, you know. Crushing weight of being alive, mortifying ordeal of being known, et cetera, et cetera.”

“Oh my gods. I’m sorry I asked.”

“Well, serves you right then, you selfish bitch.”

Percy snorts. “What, I cry all over you and now it’s your turn to vent?”

“I’m pretty sure that’s exactly how it works. Transactional and eye-for-an-eye. Exactly as friendship should be.”

“You’re not nearly as funny as you think you are,” Percy says, but he can’t tamp down his smile any more than he can stop his eyes from rolling, so there. Nico is exactly as funny as he thinks he is, thank you very much. A regular comedian.

Percy snaps textbook closed and sets it on the bedside table. “So.”

“So.”

Nico squirms. Suddenly he’s not sure why the hell he came in here in the first place. Are the floors in Cabin Thirteen really that bad? Surely not. Surely Floor Time didn’t have to be in Percy’s cabin.

(He blames Father for this. He’s horribly nosy. No doubt he’s passed his nosiness onto Nico, irregardless of his lack of DNA, and made Nico the way that he is. He can’t think of a single other reason he ducked into the cabin after lunch, when Percy still hadn’t shown his face.)

“Dude, come on. You came in here and whined and huffed and made a nuisance of yourself for literally forty minutes, and now that I’m giving you the attention you begged for you don’t want it? Nuh-uh. Spill.”

“There’s nothing to spill about,” Nico protests, “gods, can’t a man just complain in peace —”

“Ha! Not sure you can call yourself a ‘man’ if you’re voice is still cracking, squirt.”

“I literally hate you. Not joking.”

“Uh-huh. Okay.” Percy raises an eyebrow. “Well, since my guts are already spilled out and flopping all over the floor —”

“Disgusting.”

“—so it’s your turn, now.” He pokes Nico’s bicep. Nico bats him away, rolling off the bed and hitting the floor, scooting over to put more space between them. Thankfully, Percy doesn’t follow, and he exhales, settling his back against the bed frame. The mattress springs creak again as he readjusts. “You can tell me, you know.” Nico can hear the smile in his voice at the cheeky repitition. “I won’t — tell anyone. Or anything. Ahem.”

“You’re so annoying.” Nico picks at a loose thread in the knees of his pants, looping it around his finger.

Will thinks ripped jeans are stupid. He hadn’t said so outright, when Nico came back from his Aphrodite-Cabin-enforced shopping trip, but Nico had noticed his pursed lips and deliberately schooled face. When he’d pressed about it, pestering him until he’d given up with the very southern passive aggressive if you like, Nico, I love, don’t you worry about it answer, he’d gotten a forty minute rant about jeans that “sold less jean for more fuckin’ money” that made him laugh until he cried.

He yanks the thread and pulls. The hole widens.

“Oh my gods, you’re actually whipped. Is that what this is?”

Nico flushes. “Shut up.”

“It is!” Percy grins widely, wicked delight in his eyes. “You are literally thinking about him right now! You might as well be kicking your feet! You —”

“Shut up, Percy, gods.”

“I’ve never seen you so red,” he says instead, because he is incapable of following instructions. His smile fades, face softening into something more pensive. “You must really like him.”

Nico shrugs. Is that what he feels for Will? Gorgeous. I’ve been crushing on you forever. He likes a lot of people. You always know just what I need. A lot of people aren’t Will.

“He’s not scared of me.” No matter how much he fiddles with it, the metal of his ring is always cold. Cold hands, he supposes. He never heats up much. “Or. intimated. Creeped out. He thinks I’m —”

He clamps his mouth shut. A bubble of something expands in his chest, growing out of his lungs, past his shoulders, pushing his throat closed. He swallows, hard, trying to shove it back, but — Nico! Hey! You think I couldn’t stand to see a friendly face? No way, Death Boy, no more Underworld-y magic for you! I can literally feel you fading! My hands are still shaking — here, feel.

“Gorgeous?” The smile on Percy’s face is teasing, but much softer than before. “I heard he — said.”

Maybe it’s the redness of Percy’s nose that hasn’t quite faded, or his still-puffy eyes, but finally the bubble pops, and Nico sighs, tipping his head back until it rests on the edge of the bed. He closes his eyes. After a beat of hesitation, callused fingers brush through his hair, ruffling it, lingering awkwardly before pulling away. He smiles.

“Yes.”

“…Really? He just up and told you, that he had a —”

Percy stumbles on the words. Nico peeks one eye open and grinning wryly. “Yeah. He’s a hell of a lot braver than I am. Or maybe he’s just shameless.”

“He was always really intense about being your friend.” Percy screws up his face, tilting his head as if envisioning it. “I didn’t understand what that meant, at first. I didn’t get…the reason? Behind it? If that makes sense.”

“You forgot about gay people,” Nico says drily. “I know.”

“This is true,” Percy admits. He grins, sheepish. “That’s an L on my part. Every time me and Annabeth went looking for you he’d somehow know about it and ask us a bajillion questions when we got back. I just thought he was really into necromancy, or something, but now it’s like…damn.”

Nico covers his eyes with his hand, fighting back an embarrassed smile. He thinks your eyes are a tie between moonstone and agate, in case you were wondering. There is literally not a single soul in this camp unaware about how much he likes you.

“You’d think it would be easier to get him to go out with me, then.”

“It hasn’t been?”

Nico throws his hands up. “No! He doesn’t — I got him flowers, Percy, and he ground them up to make a poultice. He thought the rock I got him was a bribe. I open every door for him and I always pull out a chair for him at counsellor meetings. I make sure to stand up first when we’re sitting together and offer him a hand. I don’t know what else I can — do, gods.” He makes a noise of frustration, glaring at the ceiling. “I’m being as obvious as I can be. What am I gonna have to do to get him to realise? Fuckin’ — tattoo his name on my forehead?”

Percy slides his hand into his pocket, pulling out his pen. He twists it around his fingers, fiddling with the cap, picking at the plastic casing. He uses the end of it to trace mindless swirls on his thigh, which Nico can’t help but feel is dangerous. One wrong move and he better hope Nico can drag him to the fountain fast enough to stabilize him. But his eyes are far away, teeth gnawing on the inside of his cheek.

“There is a chance,” he says slowly, “that he…knows.”

Nico frowns, turning to face him properly. He looks resolutely at his lap. “What do you mean?”

“Well, I — well.” He does finally uncap his blade, staring at the soft glow of the bronze, rubbing his thumbnail over the leather handle. “I. Knew,” he says haltingly. “That Annabeth liked me. I —”

Nico watches him carefully. This is…news, to him. He didn’t keep up much on camp drama about the two of them — for obvious reasons — but he hardly had to. Even during his brief, one or two day stops at Camp, Percy and Annabeth gossip was impossible to avoid. People talked about them constantly, about how much they obviously cared for each other, how oblivious, especially, Percy was. It used to give him a twisted sort of hope.

“You…knew? And you didn’t do anything?”

Percy winces. “She got frustrated with hiding it. She kissed me, once, before I blew up St. Helens. And I just —” He shrugs. “I couldn’t believe that someone like her would want anything to do with someone like me.”

It’s impossible to miss his meaning, to miss the self-directed bitterness at the end of his words. Nico recognises it because he practically invented it. Someone like me. Someone disgusting, ugly, unworthy. Someone bitter and twisted and wrong. Someone so undeserving.

“I think Will is like me,” Percy continues softly. “That — insecurity.” He says the word quickly, like he might be able to hide it in the rest of the sentence. “I think he thinks very highly of you. And I think it’s hard for him to believe that you want to — to lower yourself, to be with him.”

“That’s inane,” Nico argues. “He’s — bright and kind and smart and — he’s fucking everything, what is he —!”

“He grew up a healer in a camp full of warriors. Full of talented people,” Percy murmurs. “When you’re surrounded by people who know what they’re doing, it’s easy to feel like a loser.”

Nico opens his mouth, closing it again. On principle he doesn’t agree with Percy. It doesn’t make sense. Every single person at this camp has relied on Will in more than one way for as long as he’s been here — as long as he’s been healing them. How could he not know what his purpose is? How could he not realise his talents?

Ace bandage, sound and unwound. Hard blue eyes, self-directed sneer. I’m just a healer.

“He’s not a loser,” Nico says eventually. “I don’t think he’s a — loser.”

Nico thinks he’s quite a bit more than that, actually. In fact if all words in the any language he knows, ‘loser’ is probably the least apt to describe him.

“How do I make him realise? Make him —”

Percy shrugs. “Took Annabeth several years and I still think I’m — well. I still struggle. You’ll have to be patient.” He glances over, and that mischevious smile is back on his face, the one that promises trouble and guarantees Nico an excuse to kick him. “Or, you know, you could just tell him that you think he’s bright, and kind, and smart, and beautiful, and —”

Nico does indeed kick him. He falls back against his pillow, laughing, curled against his side.

“I did not — I did not say beautiful,” Nico says hotly, “that was not on the list, you total jackass —”

Percy only laughs harder, no matter how many times Nico kicks him.

———

next

[thebearer]

follow me |carmen berzatto x reader|

prompt: the bear needs a social media rebrand. sydney hired you, and carmen gets more than just followers after meeting you.

an: bad descript i'm sorry lol. basically you're a social media manager and carmen likes you lol or how you and carmen meet <3 also thinking this will be a part 1???? lmk if you want a part 2!!!

contains: reader is a social media manager. language. carmen denying himself happiness ofc. mentions of mikey. fluff, fluff, fluff!!!

“What the hell is this?” Sydney’s voice raised, brow raised even higher to heighten her suspicions. Maybe her disgust. 

After Carmen looked at the snarl on her face, he decided it was definitely disgust. 

“What?” Carmen shrugged, looking at the screen in front of him. “It’s the, uh, The Beef’s old Instagram.” 

“Right.” Sydney said slowly, blinking at Carmen obviously. “The Beef, and we are not that anymore. We are The Bear.” She scrolled for a moment. “They also haven’t posted since twenty-twenty, which is-” 

“-Well, Mikey ran it, alright?” Carmen huffed, glaring at Sydney with annoyance. “I just found the fuckin’ password on a fucking gum wrapper in a folder labeled ‘important shit’ so I don’t know what to tell you.” 

Sydney nodded slowly, looking back at the phone, before sighing deeply. “I know what you should do.” She said, typing on her phone. Carmen grunted, still looking at the piles of order forms for produce in front of him. “You need a social media manager, because Carm, this? It's not gonna work.” 

“Social media what?” Carmen’s brows creased, shaking his head. “I don’t- no, I don’t need to do that. I’ll just, I’ll get Gary or fuckin’ Sweeps or Fak to run-”

“No, no, Carmen, seriously? Look at this. There’s- oh my God- there’s a thing here that says bring your own plate and you’ll get a free drink, Carmen… What the fuck?” Sydney sighed, shaking her head at him. 

Carmen nodded, running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, I-I’m thinking that was a, uh, a Mikey special.” He muttered, pinching his eyes shut. “I can’t afford to hire someone on the payroll for that long, ok? Not when I could hire another hostess or-or a runner.” 

“They only come in to revamp and get it started. Just a little kick start for now. To get us started.” Sydney explained, clicking on her screen. “Look, I have a mutual friend with this girl who’s really fuckin’ good, ok? She did Lobo’s that pizza place? Got them from two hundred to eighteen thousand followers in like two or three months.” 

Carmen’s eyes flashed, looking at Sydney with a raised brow. “Seriously? Fuck…” Carmen looked at the screen, the crisp photos, videos, fun and trendy- vibrant and alluring. He hated to admit it, but it was good. 

“Look, Carm, it’s free advertising, ok? You catch the influencers if it goes viral. Could really put this place out there.” Sydney countered. “It’d be a lot cheaper than paying for some shitty advertisement on the news that no one watches anyways. Could bring in a lot of business and attention.” 

Carmen’s fingers drummed against the counter, sighing sharply. “Fine, whatever, see if you can get her in and just… Just tell me how much I need to put aside, alright? I’ll push the new glasses until then.” 

Sydney smiled triumphantly, nodding at Carmen. “Yes, Chef.” She saluted, walking out of the office. 

Three days later, you were standing outside of The Bear, newly opened, freshly renovated, and steady but not booming. “Uh, excuse me?” You waved through the window at the man in the beanie, looking at you carefully. 

“Hey, we’re closed until dinner, alright? But you can-” 

“Oh, no. I, uh, I’m not here for eating.” You cringed, shaking your head. “I’m looking for Sydney? Or Carmen? I’m the new social media person?” 

“Social media?” The man repeated, pushing the door open further. “Oh, shit! You’re the girl who does the, uh, Lobo and Avec!” 

“Yeah, I am.” You blushed, walking into the restaurant. 

“I love watching those reels of the asmr cutting the bread. Ugh, I watch it every night before going to bed.” The guy laughed, locking the door behind you. “Oh, I’m Marcus by the way.” 

You took his extended hand, introducing yourself, while you took in the fixtures on the wall, the art, the overall ambiance. “I am going to get Carmen, but you can stay right here if you want.” Marcus grinned, pushing the sliding doors open. 

You set your things down, pulling out your notebook, and looking around the restaurant. You knew that this was once The Beef, Sydney had sent you a few things about Carmen’s credentials and you looked up the rest. Impressed was an understatement, a guy your age that had ran the best restaurant in the world? Quite possibly was the best chef in the world or at least Chicago and needed your help? You were nervous, to say the least. 

Marcus called your name, making you jump slightly as you turned around. “Uh, so this is Carmen. He’s the owner, the head chef.” 

“Hi,” You were met with piercing blue eyes, hidden under a stray blonde lock of hair. Carmen’s hand reached for yours. “Nice to meet you. Sydney, uh, she couldn’t stop tellin’ me about your work. Thank you for helpin’ us out.” 

“No, no, thank you.” You reached for his hand, strong, a little rough, trying not to stare at his inked fingers. “It’s a pleasure to work with you. She told me a little about you, about the restaurant. It’s very impressive. Surprised you needed me.” You grinned. 

Carmen bit back a smile, looking down to hide his blush. Fuck, Sydney said you were good at your job, she failed to mention that you were so fuckin’ pretty too. Carmen could feel his heart fluttering in his chest, taking flight like he was a middle schooler again with a school yard crush. 

“So, if you have time, I want to go over some goals with you?” You say, gripping your notebook tightly. 

“Goals. Right, uh,” Carmen looked through the back doors. “Sydney is on her break, and-and my sister, Sugar- well, her name is Natalie, she’s like our manager. Richie too, uh, shit- I’m sorry that’s a lot of people, I know.” Carmen shook his head, an anxious laugh pealing out from his lips. “Those are the people you need to talk to, basically. I can grab them, just-” 

“-But you’re the owner, right?” You asked, lifting a brow gently. 

“No, I mean, yeah, I am.” Carmen stuttered. 

“Then I need to talk to you, too.” You gave him a small smile. “I mean, you know this place better than anyone, right? All the ins and outs? And from what Sydney told me, you redid this entire place. Right?” 

“Yeah, I did.” Carmen nodded. Fuck, he kept staring at your lips, he didn’t mean to, he was just… he was distracted. 

“So, we can all meet if you want, or I can do it one at a time.” You pulled your pen out of your notebook, looking at him with a gentle smile. It had Carmen’s heart racing. “I just have a few questions about the vision.” 

“The vision?” Carmen repeated, swallowing around the growing lump in his throat. 

“Yeah, the vision.” You smiled. “Just… tell me about this place. Tell me about you.” You slid into the chair across from him. 

Carmen wiped his hands on his pants, turning to look at the doors, hoping someone would come to his rescue. He wasn’t good at talking, especially not to pretty girls, especially about himself. Still, he couldn’t leave you sitting there. He’d hired you after all, and you were here to help him. So he sat down across from you, hoping you didn’t see the way his knee bounced under the table, hoping you couldn’t hear how his heart pounded. 

“So, Carmen Berzatto,” You grinned, every syllable of his name rolling off your tongue so sweetly, Carmen was sure he was going to faint. “Tell me about The Bear. Why did you start it?”

“Well, it was The Beef before. And-And my parents owned it, then my brother Mikey did…” Carmen started, watching the way you scribbled, eyes flickering to him with a small smile.

“Hello!” You called, pushing through the back door. They’d given you the code a week ago, so you didn’t have to wait or pound on the front door until someone took mercy and let you in. “It’s content day!” You sang, cheery and bright. 

Carmen could hear the pretty trill of your voice, trickling down the hall and into the kitchen. Tina smirked, watching the way he stopped, turning to look at you, blush rising under his white shirt. “Hey, Jeff,” Tina smirked, his head snapping to her. “Your girl’s here.” 

The staff had been teasing Carmen relentlessly about how smitten he was with you. Something he’d been so reluctant to do, he now looked forward to. Carmen swore it was because of your work. You had taken them from the measly six hundred followers they’d had since they started the account in twenty-eleven to six thousand, strategic posts and tags and tagging a few buzz accounts that were Chicago foodies. Business had gone up, reservations filling slowly. Followers poured in from TikTok, from the reels, from the posts. One tag from a micro Chicago influencer had brought in a good chunk and was still, all because of a photo with the pretty light features and the dessert. 

“Where’s the Bear?” You grinned, passing Sydney, camera in hand, bag slung over your shoulder. You pushed open Carmen’s office, dropping your bag in there. He’d told you that you could keep your things in there, since you didn’t have a locker, of course- and not at all because that meant he’d see you before you left. 

“He’s in here, baby!” Tina called, smirking at Carmen. 

“C’mon,” Carmen shook his head, a deep breath to keep him from looking so flushed. It worked for a moment, of course, until you rounded the corner. All bright smiles and fuck, you smelled so good. Camren wanted to drown himself in your perfume. “Good morning, Bear.” You beamed. 

Carmen grinned, cheeks heating with every step you took forward. “Mornin’.” He muttered, looking at the clock. 

“It’s content day.” You grinned, shaking your camera lightly. “Tell me you got something good for me, Chef. What's the special this week?” 

“A lamb tenderloin with a gorgonzola sauce served over pasta- house made, of course.” Carmen answered. 

“Of course.” You repeated with a tiny grin. You turned on your camera, taking a test shot, before you looked at Carmen carefully. “Ready whenever you are, Chef.” 

Carmen bit back his own grin, clearing his throat lightly. “How do I start it? The same as last time?” 

“Yep.” You nodded, pressing the camera to your eyes. “Tell me your name, name of the restaurant, and then just this week's special.” 

“On your mark.” Carmen nodded, picking up his clean utensil. 

“On yours.” You laughed. “I’m already recording.” 

Carmen spoke to the camera easily, trying to stay trained on the lens and not at you. How you’d grin and nod encouragingly at him, zooming in closer as he chopped, seasoned, pulled the already prepared and finished product out of the oven. 

Richie crossed his arms, leaning against the wall next to Sugar, lips pursed knowingly. “I know you’re thinkin’ the same shit as me.” 

Sugar hummed. “That Carmen’s into her?” 

“Way fuckin’ into her.” Richie grinned, watching as Carmen blushed, grinning back at you, genuine and a little shy at your compliment. 

“Fifty bucks says he doesn’t make a move.” Sugar looked at Richie. 

Richie snorted, scoffing with a shake of his head. “Alright. I’ll take your bet. I say he does.” 

“Get ready to be out of fifty dollars, Cousin.” Sugar said smugly. “This is Carmy we’re talking about. Not Mikey. Carmen’s not gonna make a move on her.” 

“Eh, not so quick, my dear, Natalie. Carmen’s changed a little since this place.” Since the horrendous freezer incident with Claire. “He really likes her too, look at ‘em.” Richie nodded, watching as Carmen held the spoon out for you, blushing when your hand touched his to take it, groaning before smothering him in compliments. Tina looked at Richie, amused and grinning from across the room. 

“Carmen will seal the deal. It’ll be last fuckin’ minute and it will be a mess, because it’s fuckin’ Carmen, but… I believe in him.” Richie nodded. 

Natalie snorted. “I genuinely hope you’re right, Cousin.” She looked at Carmen with a small smile, watching the way he looked at you, eyes cutting like he was being so cool about keeping his feelings underwraps. “I really do.” 

That night, Carmen lied in bed, scrolling through his footage from the day, seeing the video pop up from @/thebearchicago. Set to classical music, snobby and dramatic, the cuts, Carmen’s voice laid over describing the meal for the week, and a particularly good close up of his hands cutting the onions fiercely. Carmen was shocked to see the number of likes… the number of comments flooding in. 

“the cameraman knew exactly what they were doing lmao”

“New necklace available!!!” 

“I will give you my vital organs and let you chop them up like that if you let me watch chef please” 

“What the fuck?” Carmen snorted lightly, shaking his head, scrolling through the comments. He clicked to the main page of the restaurant, seeing you were just a few away from ten thousand followers. Fuck… Sydney was fucking right. You were good. 

Carmen’s face fell, mind racing and screaming with the reminder that you were only there for a few more days. He’d only hired your for two months- two glorious fucking months. You seemed… permanent now. Like he couldn’t imagine you not coming in on Tuesdays and Thursdays and after three on Fridays. You were a staple there. The staff loved you, you were good, and-

And Carmen really liked you. Liked having you around. Looked forward to talking to you. To get the chance to lean over your shoulder as an excuse to touch you when you showed him a preview of a post. Or when you’d send him cute text messages, a funny comment attached, your text reading: “you’re a hit, bear! they love you!” 

It was like you could read his mind, your contact flashing across the screen at him. 

To: Carmen 

‘told you this would be a good one! the fans love you berzatto!!!’ 

Carmen grinned, the faint twinge of a blush on his face. He could feel his heart racing, fingers dancing over the keyboard, and worst of all- he could hear Mikey’s fucking voice in the back of his head. A nagging tone repeating over and over and over, “Let it rip, Bear! Don’t be such a pussy! Ask her out!” 

Carmen looked at his screen, fingers typing out the message, a short, less than smooth invite to make you a special thank you dinner and his place- a date. He hoped you picked up on it. Heat hammering in his chest, he could feel his chest tighten, ribs knitting together uncomfortably, stomach twisting in the worst way. 

So, Carmen did what he always did. 

From: Carmen 

‘Never doubted you. Thank you. The video was great.’ 

He watched as the blue sent, the delivered turning into seen, and followed by your thumbs up over the text. Carmen put his phone on the table, lying back on his pillow, but he couldn’t sleep. His stomach still turned, unsettled with regret. 

“Oh! Marcus stop!” You gasped, Carmen’s head turning at the sound of your voice. “You didn’t need to do all of this!” 

“Yeah, I did.” Marcus beamed. Carmen turned the corner, seeing a beautifully piped cake there, candles and icing cursive that read “thank you!” in the middle of the buttercream. “You’re cool and you got us on the map, girl. Plus, we’re gonna miss you.” 

“Yeah,” Sydney nodded, holding a small balloon that said that exact phrase on it. “We will miss you.” 

“I’ll miss you guys.” You grinned, hugging them both tightly. “This has been my favorite job so far. You guys have been so nice. Way nicer than a lot of these assholes around here.” You grinned. 

Richie stood on the wall, foot tapping, eyes darting back from you to Carmen. He could see his cousin’s stuttering movements, hesitant and careful, before retreating back into himself. C’mon, Carm, fuckin’ do it, Richie thought, shaking his head. Carmen wouldn’t though, wouldn’t let himself be happy. Richie took a deep breath, head shaking with annoyance. 

“Goddammit, Berzatto,” Richie muttered, pushing off the wall. “You know, sweetheart, it’s been so great having you. Seriously, you blew us all away.” Richie said, walking towards you. 

You smiled. “Thanks, Richie. I really appreciate it.” 

“And you know what, we want to really show how much we appreciate you.” Richie’s eyes cut to Natalie, a silent plea to help him out. “I had a cancellation for this evening, and I would love for you to come instead. Let us really cook for you, give you the whole experience. No bill, of course. All on the house, for you, my dear.” 

“Oh, I-I couldn’t let you guys do that.” You shook your head politely, eyes cutting to Carmen’s. 

“No-No, please.” Carmen nodded, finally speaking. Richie sighed silently in relief. “It would be great actually. Please?” 

You felt your heart melt, nodding softly. Before you could even reply, Richie was stepping up again. “And you know what? You gotta do one last post for us, right? The big chef spotlight one. The, uh, c’mon, Sydney what am I lookin’ for here?” 

“Oh, the one about the staff spotlights?” Sydney asked. 

“That’s the one. See, that’s it. And you’ve done everyone except the big boss.” Richie pointed at Carmen, ignoring the way the younger man’s face fell. 

“I didn’t get one-” Fak started, Richie shoving him out of the way. 

“You gotta end with Carmy, and it's funny because it’s gonna be real slow tonight anyways. Wednesday, ya know? And I think what better way to experience the night, really craft that staff spotlight thing, than with Carmen. The two of you, have dinner and get to talk.” Richie knew it was rocky, not at all smooth, but it was the best he could do. 

“What? Cousin, what are you-” 

“-No, you’re right, Richie.” Sugar added, stepping towards Carmen, and cutting him off. “And Carm, you were saying you wanted to see everything in action for yourself. You do the customer experience so you make sure everything’s good, and we’ll serve you both dinner. All the stops.” 

“How’s that sound?” Richie clapped his hands together, nodding at Tina, who grinned. 

“Jeff, it would be really nice to make sure we can work without your instructions. A good night for it too.” Tina added. 

“Yeah, and Sydney’s got it.” Richie nudged the girl beside him. 

“Totally, Carm- uh, Chef. I’ve got it.” Sydney nodded, catching on to Richie’s glare at her. 

Carmen felt like he could melt into the floor, face red and palms sweaty. His ears were ringing, tongue swelled thick in his mouth. You looked over at him with a small smile. “I mean, that does sound really nice. If-If it’s ok with you guys, you don’t have to-” 

“-Oh no,” Richie shook his head, walking over to Carmen to clap him on the shoulders. “We insist, don’t we, cousin?” Richie laughed, leaning down to Carmen. “Don’t fuckin’ stand there like a jagoff, say somethin’.” He whispered. 

“Yeah.” Carmen said, swallowing thickly around the lump in his throat. “It’s, uh, yeah. That-That sounds great.” 

“Wonderful.” Richie beamed. “Six o’clock sounds good for you kids? Give you enough time to get it together.” Richie looked from you to Carmen. “Maybe for some of us to take a shower.” 

Carmen could feel the heat rise from his neck to his cheeks, covering him in a furious blush. You giggled. “Definitely gives me time to get a blow out.” You laugh. “See you at six then?” 

“It’s a date.” Natalie added, practically bouncing on her toes behind Carmen. 

Carmen glared at her, before turning back to you. “Yeah, I-I’ll see you then.” 

[satorusugurugurl]

If this request makes you uncomfortable or isn’t something you want to write, I apologize and please ignore my request!

Heyy! I was wondering if I could request a satoru x reader x Suguru smut? With like, some bdsm mixed in yk. Tying reader up, satoru is a tease, and likes to make her squirm and ask questions he know she can’t answer because Suguru is fucking her throat. But Suguru is mean. Mean and tougher than satoru. He tells satoru to stop being so gentle with you, that not only do you deserve rough treatment but you like it. And satoru listens to him, of course. I just want them to run through me like a train😞

Also same mean geto anon (again lol) I’m gonna just sign off w an emoji now :3 -🍭

Hi Anon!

This isn't my cup of tea, it's my FUCKING jam!!

Summary: Gojo and Geto had been on a two-week-long mission, which hadn't gone as smoothly as Suguru wanted. He was pent-up and frustrated. So, of course, Gojo called you to warn you it might not be a good idea to come over. You, of course, did not heed his warning. The second you get home, you realize that you were screwed.

Word Count: 3,706

Warnings: BDSM, rough sex, oral sex, so much sex, degradation, teasing, the smuttiest of smut

A/N: Good God, Satoru x Reader x Suguru is my weakness!! I put my whole heart into this. Geto Suguru, teacher AU, is my kryptonite!

Part Two

She Likes it Like That

“Y/N babe,” Gojo said in a hushed whisper, “you probably shouldn't come home tonight.”

You cocked an eyebrow, looking away from the first year's training. “I'm sorry, did you just tell me not to come home. . .to our apartment?” The world ‘our’ came out like acid.

Gojo sighed overdramatically. “Don't say it like that. I'm trying to save you! Suguru is in such a bad mood.” You listened to him walking around. “I sighed out loud when I noticed the last of my mochi was gone. Fuck you for that, by the way, and do you know what he said to me?” You pinched at the bridge of your nose, waiting for the rant to continue. “He told me to shut the fuck up! For sighing!”

“What did you do to piss him off? Oh, and just an FYI, I bought you more mochi, asshole.”

“Oh—” silence, “thank you-I’m sorry, please don't return it.”

“Satoru! Forget about the mochi. What happened to Sugu?”

The mission your partners were sent on did not go as planned. Their hotel had flooded; it was not like they had time to consider sleeping. The higher-ups sent them to an abandoned mountainside village full of cursed spirits. Poor Suguru had to swallow dozens for nearly two weeks. Gojo had enough; he couldn't stand the pained expression on his face as he gagged the last spirit down. So he decided to Hollow-Purpled the entire village.

The second they got back, the higher-ups scolded the hell out of them. Chastising them, complaining that they didn't do a good enough job. After all their hard work, the time they spent away from home, from you. Those bastards dared to complain about their hard work. It sent Suguru into a terrible mood, one that was bound to end with either a fight or someone getting fucked into the mattress.

One thing about Suguru was that when he was pissy, things felt out of his control. He needed to take control back. Which meant he wanted to have sex. He would be rough, really rough, tying either you or Satoru up, not letting you go until he had calmed down. Or if one of you was fucked too stupid to continue, his eyes focused on the other that wasn't tied up.

“So please, just stay with Ieiri tonight. I'm going to lock myself in my room. Last time he was this pissed off, the both of us were so sore we couldn't move.”

“Ugh, fuckin’ whatever.” This whole situation wasn't fair. You hated how your boyfriends were mistreated.

“Yeah, just stay the—oh, hi Suguru.” There was a shuffling in the background. “No, I wasn't talking shit.” Satoru nervously laughed. “Look, Sugu—no, put down the rope—”

“Toru?” Panic for your boyfriend sank into your stomach.

“Hey! Wait a second—Sugu—”

Before any other indication of what was happening came through the receiver, the other line cut off. So you quickly yelled to the students you had to leave and took off. By the time you made it, you were breathless from running and realized that in your panic, you left your keys at work.

You picked up the spare key hidden under the doormat. Just as you were about to unlock the door, it flew open. You slowly blinked, looking up at a very irritated Suguru. The man radiated gloom and tension. He was in his sweatpants, and his hair was tied in a messy bun, and, dear God, he looked pent up.

“Why the fuck are you using the spare key?”

“I-I uh—”

“Ooooh~ there she is~!” a hand gently rested against Suguru’s shoulder as Satoru peered down at you from behind your dark-haired boyfriend. “There's our girl!”

It only took a moment to see that Satoru mirrored Suguru’s frustration and anger. Oh fuck. The key fell from your hand as you took a step back. Suguru was demanding and rough when he was pent up. Satoru, on the other hand, was a tease. He liked pushing you, making you cry. Both of them being in a pissy mood simultaneously, this was a nightmare for you.

“Y-You, I thought you were in trouble!”

“Oh yeah, no.” Suguru’s soured face slowly twisted into a smirk as Satoru licked his lip. “But you~?” Suguru’s hand darted out, grabbing you by the front of your shirt, preventing you from moving further back. “You're royally fucked.” Before you even had a chance to respond, Suguru and Satoru grabbed you, yanking you inside.

“Awe~” Satoru hummed as he trailed his kiss up the bare thighs he lay between. “Look at you~ trying to clamp your thighs shut.” Gojo’s fingers were buried deep inside of you. Finger fucking you to the edge of yet another orgasm he would deny. “But you can't, can you~? Suguru’s got you all tied to the bed, spread out for us to use you.” A muffled moan escaped you. “Huh? What was that princess? You gotta use your big girl words.” Satoru tilted his head, cupping his free hand around the back of his ear. “Oooh! That's right, you can't talk when getting your throat fucked.”

You gagged as Suguru's cock hit the back of your throat. He was quiet, his eyes shut in concentration. He looked so fucking hot, so focused on the feeling of your mouth. Sweat was beading on his forehead as he pulled in and out of your mouth, grunting softly as you hollowed your cheeks. But the more Satoru spoke, the more Suguru knitted his eyebrows.

“I bet you want me to stuff your pussy, too, don't you~? You want to be spit-roasted between your two boyfriends?” Your pussy twitched at his words. “Oooh~!! Your cunt just twitched. Is that what our sweet girl wants—”

“Satoru,” Suguru snarled, “shut the fuck up.”

“Well, excuse the fuck out of me. Y/N likes it when I tease her.”

Suguru tsked, pulling his thick cock out of your mouth. You gasped and coughed, spit and precum coating your chin. Between your pants and the gasps for air, Suguru went to what you thought would be a head pat. Instead, his fingers tangled in your air with a hard yank, pulling you up to look down at Satoru. His face was flushed, cerulean eyes wide as he looked between his two partners.

“Look at the fucking slutty face she's making.” The grip on your hair tightened. “You think she looks like this because of your pitiful teasing?” A shaky moan escaped you as he tightened his grip harder. “No, she looks like this because this little slut likes it rough.”

Fuck, you wanted more, to run your hands over Suguru’s arms, to grip his cock, urging him to keep fucking your throat. You were desperate to trap Satoru's head firmly between your thighs, forcing him to kiss and lick your clit. Instead, you weakly tugged at the purple restraints tied to both your wrists and ankles. Suguru had set up the rigging underneath the mattress, making it impossible for you to move. Meaning if you wanted his cock back in your mouth or Satoru’s tongue inside of you, you had to wait for them.

What made it more frustrating was the fact that you were completely bare. Not allowing you to hide the way your body reacted to Suguru’s dirty words. He was telling the truth. And the truth was behind your body's reactions. Gojo could see it in the way your tight entrance clenched around his fingers. He could feel your pussy drip around him, your wetness running down his knuckles. Suguru was right; you did like it; no, like wasn't the right word.

You fucking loved it.

Suguru could see the wheels turning in Satoru’s head as his eyes glittered with lust and excitement. “Satoru~ do you finally see it?~” The way Suguru purred his name had Satoru’s cock throbbing. “You see why she came home, even though she knew she’d get fucked?”

“Yeah, yeah, she's a fucking slut.”

“Yeah, she is.” A sharp tug on your head made you yelp. Suguru grinned, cocking an eyebrow at you. “You want it rough? Want me to fuck your throat so hard you cry, pretty girl?”

“Y-Yes, please.”

Gripping his cock at the base, Suguru slapped his thick meat against your cheek. “That's a good girl. Now open up.” slowly, you opened your mouth to him. Watching your tongue slip out had his tip angry, throbbing red. “Now,” he smeared the beading precum over your bottom lip, “say ah~.”

“Ahh~” The second that sound left your pretty mouth Suguru shoved his cock in your mouth. Your eyes stung as tears filled your eyes.

Satoru’s fingers had stopped their slow movements inside of you. His mouth was dry as he gulped. Suguru had been rough before, but this was a whole new level. His thick fingers wrapped around your Y/H/C hair, holding your head in place. His hips pull back before slamming forward, his ass clenching with the force of each thrust. Blue eyes slowly trailed over to your face. Your eyes were red, big tears slowly down your cheeks, and your throat was fucked. Satoru swore he could see Suguru’s tip bulging in your slender neck.

This was fucking hot. Suguru’s bare back glittered in the low light of the bedroom, a sheen of sweat beaded over his toned muscles. It was like watching a god fuck a mortal Suguru radiated a dominating power as he watched their girlfriend choke and gag on his cock. Satoru’s cock was so hard it fucking hurt. Reaching down, he wrapped his hand around his throbbing shaft, jerking it slowly as he leaned down, kissing and nipping at your inner thighs.

The gentle kisses had you sighing contently around Suguru’s cock. Looking over his shoulder, Suguru sighed as he watched Satoru. His pink tongue was stuck out, gently teasing your damp folds. The sensation had you sighing around his dick, and that was not what he needed right this fucking second. Suguru wanted more; he needed it to relieve the tension in his shoulder. But that relief, the release he needed, wouldn’t happen, with Satoru teasing you like he loved to do.

“Satoru,” Suguru's voice was rough, “I just told you Y/N likes it rough.”

“Uh-huh~” Satoru’s voice was muffled as his face buried in your pussy, making you whine around the cock buried in your mouth.

“You’re not being rough enough.” Satoru pulled back, making you whine in protest. “Oh, I’m sorry. Do you want to come down here and eat Y/N’s pussy while I get my dick sucked?”

“No.” The cocky smile that was beginning to form on Satoru’s face was suddenly gone as Suguru reached his free hand down, wrapping his fingers in soft white hair. “I want you to fucking eat her cunt out like you fucking hate her.” Your eyes rolled back as Satoru was slammed back down into your pussy. The moan that left his mouth vibrated just right against our clit, making you cry out. “Ah~ fuck yes.” Your cries vibrated around Suguru’s cock, just the way he wanted. “That’s it, Satoru, keep it up.”

“Mmmmph.” Finally, having a picture of how Suguru wanted him to act, Satoru found himself motivated. Again, it might be because his boyfriend was tugging and pulling at his sensitive hairline. Yeah, that was motivating him. Fuck you like he hated you, he could do that. He was just as pent-up as Suguru was.

Fingers slammed inside your pussy, fucking in and out of your tight hole with a force and speed that had you crying out in pleasure. Your moans felt so fucking good, and the more you opened your mouth to cry, the deeper Suguru fucked your throat. He hit the back over and over again, his hand pressing firmly against Satoru’s head, pushing him harder against your clit. The two of you moaned while your mouths were being used; the sounds of whimpers, squelches, and gagging were like a symphony to Suguru’s ears.

Out of all the ways for him to relieve his stress, this was by far his favorite.

“Hah—fuck keep that up, Satoru, bring her right to the edge, then stop. I want her cumming with both of us inside of her. Fucking her so rough she has to call out of work tomorrow and Friday.” The thought of that had you pulling on your restraints. “Oooh oh, you like that? You like knowing the two of us will make sure you can’t walk or talk tomorrow?” Your muffled moans were quickly molded into gags as Suguru roughly fucked your face. “Yeah, you fucking do, you nasty little slut.”

Your mind was spinning as you felt yourself climbing closer and closer to your orgasm. The room was so hot and reeked of sex. It was all you could do not to allow yourself to cum right then and there. Satoru could feel it, the way your little swollen clit throbbed against his tongue, how your walls clamped down on his fingers. He wanted to send you over the edge. He was close to following you as he fucked his hips helplessly into the mattress, wishing it was your wet pussy instead.

One orgasm wouldn’t hurt, would it? You had been so good to them, allowing the duo to drag you into the house, strip you in the entryway, and tie you to the bed. Plus, on top of all that, they had left you alone for two weeks. You had to rely on that stupid vibrator Suguru insisted on allowing you to keep. That stupid toy was nothing compared to his tongue. Which was probably why he was bringing you to a mind-blowing orgasm in under three minutes.

Yeah, he was going to let you cum.

Curling his fingers up into your g-spot, Satoru fucked you as fast as his wrist would allow. Suguru instantly knew what was happening. From the way your eyes shut to how loud you were moaning around him, you were seconds away from cumming. If he was in a better mood, he might have allowed it to happen. Unfortunately, he wasn’t done with you yet.

“Stop.” Suguru scolded, pulling Satoru away from your dripping sex.

Both you and Satoru made disapproving groans as your orgasm slowly faded out of sight. “Doesn’t she deserve a treat? She’s been so good!” Satoru whined, licking your juices off his lips.

“I agree. Y/N does deserve a reward. But you need to give it to her in the roughest way that you can.” Suguru pulled his cock out of your mouth, allowing you to catch your breath. “Look at it this way. We get to blow off the steam while we make up for making her play with herself for two weeks.”

“Huh?” Those words struck a different chord in Satoru, and his cock twitched.

“Y/N, sweetheart, how often would you say you played with yourself when we were gone.”

You swallowed at the air greedily. “I don’t know, seven, maybe eight times.” Both your boyfriends shuddered, hearing the hoarseness of your voice.

“And out of all of those times, did you cum as hard as you do with us.”

“Not at all. They were all baby orgasms.”

Suguru shut his eyes, nodding his head. “See, Satoru, not only does our little slut like us rough and demanding, but we have to make up for those eight little orgasms.” When the dark-haired man looked back at Satoru, he saw a flash of white before your scream of shock and please bounced off the walls.

Suguru’s eyes were slightly wide as his brain tried to catch up with what his eyes had just witnessed. What he saw was Satoru balls deep inside of you. His thrusts were sloppy and needy, and fuck you looked as stunned as Suguru. One second you had been empty, pussy craving a cock deep inside of it from the denied orgasm. In the blink of an eye, Satoru was fucking into you more brutal than he’d ever fucked you before.

“I fucking told you, that toy was nothing compared to us.” Satoru snarled against the crook of your neck, digging his teeth into the sensitive skin. “Fucking stupid toy, not pleasing my girl.”

“Oh my—fuck, holy fuck!” You cried out, mouth wide open. Giving Suguru the perfect opportunity to get back to fucking your throat. The bittersweet taste of pre-cum had your mouth watering. He returned to the brutal pace he was in several minutes again.

“She needs that Satoru. What if we get sent on another long mission? She’s just supposed to suffer?” The thought of that had Suguru tilting his head, bangs falling in front of his eye. “You know what, I think you might be on to something. If we take her toy away, then we’d have to fuck her even harder the next time we get home.”

Satoru’s teeth sank harder into your neck as the tip of his cock slammed almost too hard into your cervix, making you scream around Suguru. “Exactly. Let me use reversal red on it, Y/N, please, baby.” You started to shake your head in a desperate plea to let you keep it. But Suguru’s cock in your throat made it impossible to do so. “What was that? Oh, right, you have your mouth full.” His lips moved against your pulse as his fingers dug into your hips. “Guess we’ll just have to say the way your clamping down on my cock is a yes in our book.” Your eyes darted up to Suguru, who had bought you the toy, for help.

“Mhmm fuck, yeah, I’m pretty sure she just hummed an ‘uh-huh’ around my cock.”

You wanted to argue, to fight against this rash decision, but you felt so good it was almost impossible to care. You were screaming around Suguru’s cock. Tears streaming down your face, leaving behind trails of mascara. They were both being so mean and rough. God, it was so fucking good. Who cared about a clit sucker when your throat and pussy were being fucked into next week.

“She’s close.” Satoru cried out, his balls slapping against your ass. “Oh fuck she’s hugging my cock so tight I’m going to explode Suguru.”

With blurry eyes, you glanced up at Suguru. His cheeks were flushed, and his eyes shut tight. “I know, oh fuck I know, I’m so close, Satoru, don’t fuckin’ stop, make her cum, make her cum so hard.” Both his hands grabbed your face fucking your throat roughly as Satoru cried out, his hand pressing roughly on your clit, rubbing it in fast circles.

That was all that you needed. You cried out, squirting all over Satoru’s crotch, abdomen, and the mattress. Your orgasm set a domino effect between your boyfriends. Suguru followed behind you, his body hunched over you, his hands gently squeezing your head as he filled your mouth full of his thick cum. You weakly tried swallowing all of it, but that was somewhat difficult as Satoru extended your orgasm.

His thumb continues to rub your clit until his face scrunch up, mouth open in a feral growl. Satoru's orgasm hit him like a punch in the gut. He fucked all three of you harder, closer to oblivion. The headboard slamming against the wall as the restraint dug into your wrists was the only thing grounding you to remain on Earth. Satoru didn’t let up on the rough thrusts until he felt his cum dripping around his cock onto the bed.

The throbbing pain in the back of your throat, deep inside of your pussy was all the confirmation you needed that your boyfriends had fulfilled their promise. Never in your life had you been fucked so roughly. But it was a pain that you warmly welcomed.

After coming down, Suguru was the first to move gently. The rough hands that had been holding you in a vice gently held you as he pulled his softening cock out of your mouth. “Lay down.” His gruff, gentle voice whispered as he helped rest you against a pillow.

“Oh fuck—“ Satoru lifted his head off your shoulder, “I haven’t cum that hard in a while.” He was so slow, pulling out of you, grimacing as you cried out. “Sorry, fuck I’m sorry, baby.”

You shut your eyes, listening to Satoru getting out of bed. You could hear water running in the bathroom as gentle fingers began undoing your restraints. “You did such a good job, Y/N,” Suguru whispered. “Such a good girl for us.” His praise had you humming happily as he made quick work of the rest of the ropes.

“Suguru, let’s order in, yeah?”

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

The next half hour was a blur of warm happiness. Satoru helped wash your body in a bubble bath before Suguru joined you, kneeling next to the tub, lovingly stroking your face and hair. After you were cleaned up, your hair brushed, and pajamas on. You crawled into your bed with fresh sheets and relaxed. Satoru and Suguru fluffed your pillows and brought you a cup of tea for your raw throat. When your dinner arrived, the three of you sat in bed together to eat as a B-grade horror movie played on the television.

After eating, Satoru left to throw out the take-out containers. “Mmm, thank you for letting us do all that,” Suguru said as he crawled into bed after his shower. “That mission, it was rough.”

“I’m always happy to help.” Your voice cracked, making Suguru frown. “Stop frowning,” you flicked his forehead. “I like it rough.”

The bed dipped, and Satoru wrapped his arms around your waist. “Y/N can handle it. She is dating the two strongest, after all.” Both you and Suguru scoffed, relaxing in the growing silence. “Oh, by the way, Y/N.”

“Yeah?” You yawned, snuggling into Suguru’s chest as he turned the bedside lamp off.

“Did you bring home my mochi?”

In the dark of the room, you heard a thump and Satoru’s whine before Suguru pulled the three of you closer to him. “Satoru shut the fuck up about the mochi.”

[cosmiiwrites]

OKOK SO FEM!READER X ADAM AND THE ONLY ONE BED TROPE THING LIKE ADAM AND READER GOT SENT ON A RECON MISSION AND THEY HAD TO STAY AT A HOTEL AND THE ONLY ROOM THEY HAD LEFT HAD ONLY ONE BED IN IT AND READER THOUGHT ADAM HATED HER BC LUTE WAS TOO BUSY TO GO ONTO THE MISSION WITH ADAM SO READER HAD TO GO INSTEAD BUT PLOT TWISTTT… ADAM ACTUALLY HAS A LITTLE CRUSH ON HERRR🙈🙈 BUT OBVIOUSLY COCKY ASS ADAM WONT ADMIT IT

˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ one bed

.ೃ࿐ adam x fem!reader .ೃ࿐

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ summary: in which adam and reader share a bed... what could go wrong? cw: fem!reader, she/her pronouns used, cussing, cuddling a/n: I LOVED THIS IDEA SMM

"you've gotta be fuckin' kidding me." sera had requested you to accompany adam on a mission somewhere in heaven. you two were to inspect a hotel, and make sure it was suitable for heaven's residents to stay in. you were confused; why hadn't lute gone with him instead? you were sure he would've much preferred it. "adam, the only reason im sending you to this mission with [name] is because lute is unavailable at the moment. she will have to suffice." "ugh, fine, whatever." he looked over at you. "just, dont fuck up the mission, kay?" adam said. you shook your head profusely. ----------------------------------------------------------

the hotel was already fully booked, except for one room. and of course, you guys took it. once you both were led to your room, you two inspected it. one bathroom, a desk, a couch, and... one bed. you two quickly realized the bed situation, considering you both stared at it in utter silence, blushing.

"i'm taking the bed," adam was the first to break the growing tension. "wha- but-" you stuttered. adam's finger flew to your mouth, shushing you. "would you prefer it if we slept together?" he teased. your face turned an unusual shade of red. "i thought so." "whatever," you muttered. "i guess i'll take the couch." it was already getting late, and in the morning you and adam had to wake up early to report back to sera. you took a spare blanket you had requested from room service, and took it to the couch along with a pillow.

it was obviously uncomfortable, you kept tossing and turning and groaning.

adam caught onto this, and was quick to say something about it.

“fuckin’ hell, can you be quiet? im trying to sleep,” adam complained.

“well im sorry, you arent the one sleeping on a couch thats barely half my size!”

he stayed silent for a while, before lending out an offer.

adam rubbed his forehead in supposed annoyance.

“jesus- fuck, fine. you can sleep on the bed,” he groaned. “but if you touch me you’re sleeping on the couch again.”

“trust me, i wasnt planning to.” you huffed.

you took your stuff and lay on the opposite side of the bed.

it was hard to not touch adam, he was pretty much sprawled out!

this idiot, you thought.

a few minutes later, when you thought he was asleep, you felt a pair of arms snake around your waist.

adam pulled you towards him, your back pressed up against his chest. he laid his head atop your neck, making your face flush.

“a-adam??” you squeaked, unable to move. he had you trapped in his arms.

you were squirming under his touch, which annoyed him greatly.

“mm… stop moving, you’re making this difficult.”

you were confused. adam was the one who didnt want you touching him!

“oh my god,” you interally face-palmed.

you were cuddling with the asshole everyone called the first man.

and surprisingly, you found it enjoyable.

you slept distraction free and comfortable for the rest of the night.

you woke up still in his embrace: you were on top of adam, his two arms glued to your waist.

you wouldve woke him up sooner if the position you two were in wasnt so comfortable.

but eventually you had to head back to sera.

“dude, get the fuck up,”

“huh— WHAT THE FUCK?!” he yelped. “why are you on top of me??”

“stop the yelling, YOU came onto me. you started hugging my waist!”

adam’s face turned beet red when he remembered. but he would play it off.

“…oh yeah, that. it helped me sleep, okay? if you tell anyone about that i’ll fuckin’ kill you.”

you scrunched your eyebrows.

“jeez, no need to resort to violence. id never tell anyone i spent a night cuddling ADAM.”

you bruised his ego a bit, but he didnt care.

“yeah, well you cant tell me you didnt enjoy it.”

“…fuck you.”

“i knew it.”

adam looked pleased, but before you could respond, he pulled you onto his chest once again, this time placing his hand on your thigh. adam was so nonchalant about the whole cuddling thing. he was acting like it was a normal, everyday activity! not that you would mind if it was, though.

“im going back to sleep,” he yawned.

“but sera-“

“sera can wait.” he grumbled.

“you dumbass.”

[hazelfoureyes]

Ugh. Fuck. You set the Alastor smut bar pretty fuckin high, ya know?

At that point I'm at mercy of two smut authors, you being one of them.

I try to find m o r e, but everytime I start to read something and see Alastor OOC, I'm just like "oh for fucks sake. I can't fap to this... *opens your master list and mumbles to herself* fuckin' Hazel... I swear to fuckin' god..."

Are you aware that you're wielding the power of writing one of the best smutty Alastors on that side of tumblr? Not only character-, but also situation-wise.

A great, captivating reads overall.

I shook your hand, now I'm damned forever.

Fuckin' smut chain 'round my neck, and your hand holding the other end.

And I hate that I love it so much.

I feel powerful! Alastor has Husk and Niffty, Ive got you 💖⛓️ okay so it MEANS ALOT TO ME because I’m the same! I settle into a smut and it gets crazy OOC and I’m like “well I can’t get off to this 😩”

You flatter me and got me all giddy over here 🥺

I’m your smut dom??

ଳ⊹₊ ⋆ masterlist

[th0rns-n-r0ses]

raving about hot men [you dont have to read this]

Hi. I'm just gonna rave about Axl for God knows how long. dude I'm genuinely in love I love every little thing, like seriously, blushing and kicking my feet and giggling. I'm the most dominant and overpowering motherfucker you're gonna meet (not really but that's for perspective) and this man has me on my knees, I seriously just need him like what. Okay so his hair looks so soft and fluffy and I wanna bury my face in it and breathe in and smell it and run my hands in it. I would brush it and wash it for him like no joke I would give him the best hair care you've ever fuckin' seen. As for eyes, oh my God, those eyes are so pretty and perfect, I just find myself lost in them. Sometimes in lil clips and recordings I see, his eyes just sparkle and shine and ohmygod it's so pretty I can't even. His nose, I don't have much to say on, but Jesus fucking Christ it's perfect. Shape, size, everything I'm so jealous. I hate my nose and his is so perfect, I just wanna steal it (that sounds so weird help). HIS SMILE IS SO CUTE I ALWAYS LOSE MY MIND OVER IT I'M NOT JOKING AARRGGGHHHHHHH IT'S SO INFECTIOUS LIKE I SMILE SO HARD WHEN I SEE THAT SMILE I'M JUST WHYS HE SO YES DUDE WHY WHY WHY THIS ISN'T FAIIIIRRRRRR. And his build. Oh. My. Fucking. God. I want him to just overpower me like I'm I'm only 2 inches shorter than him but he can overpower me whenever he wants to. He's so strong looking and I feel like his thighs would be such a nice pillow. Oh my God literally imagine, laying your head on his lap while he smiles down at you and plays with your hair!? I would lose my MIND. I would be a damned puddle if that happened, I'd be red as strawberries. And oh my god his laugh. I'm. I'm. I'm. His voice is so warm and cute and I just want to kiss his lips and on the tip of his nose and give him a huge hug and give him the love and care he deserves (fuck you Stephanie Seymour). anyway sorry if you read that im ugh i need his arms around me so bad dude

[jack-kellys]

hi guys i saw newsies again

i think what we collectively didn’t realize about the context of which santa fe is sung is that jack is beat to hell, like on his way to a concussion while he’s singing that. he is barely pulling himself up that ladder, he’s leaning against literally every piece of rail or penthouse beam that he can. like. santa fe is, really, a dream. he sings it when waking early in the morning with charlie and then when he’s fucking concussed. it’s actually a delusion in this version. god…

david jacobs will get his way or die trying and i have to admire his gay little snooty faces LMAO… “tell me how quitting does crutchie any good?” is said while he’s looking over the paper with his back to jacks with an eyebrow raised. and when jacks doesn’t respond (which davey doesn’t even see he just fuckin knows) his “exactly” is this sing-song told-you-so of-course-i’m-right and i’m obsessed with it

tommy boy’s like plot thru this is really strong???? he’s reluctant to strike and then shows up as a scab and is the last one to agree to join the strike, and then at the rally when jack betrays them he. he is literally screaming “we hate you! we hate you!” at the top of his lungs at jack oh my god. jack bromage i owe you everything holy shit

charlie is genuinely like my favorite character in this production. i think this is the best take i’ve ever seen, the best acting, the most genuine acting, like. matthew is that good, and so is crutchie as a character. he’s so fun to watch react

^going off that through the whole precursor scene to TWWK for him is like. visceral. charlie has an understanding of the streets and the police that is sort of… almost deeper than jack’s. jack is ready to fight, but charlie is like horribly aware of their position, and almost argues jack’s for-the-strike fervor against the strike. he’s looking at other guys with this older sibling “don’t be stupid don’t do this” look, he’s very in favor of finch’s “the cops’ll bust our heads”, and his “like we got a choice?” to henry’s “[can we sell] at those prices?” is definitive. it’s a fucking command, until jack says to hold on obviously. idk… i just really crutchie’s very obvious position as a leader in this show, and he’s not just strong for “getting through it”, he’s jaded from living with it. ugh. best character.

jack’s face through the “my daughter, katherine” scene is such a journey LMAO… michael is soooo. good. he gets so mad at pulitzer’s “and beautiful, isn’t she?”, he has this withering look when he says “i’ll tell her you said so.” god. and then the WAY that goes to a different kind of anger—

one thing about jack is that anger is not one emotion for him, and he shows it every time. disgust looks different, shock/betrayal looks different, rage looks different. he is so, so, genuinely angry as a character and that’s terribly romantic and sad. to feel the fight for every scenario in your veins, to only feel forced to run at every opportunity. god god god, jack kelly, the character you are.

also i asked michael to sign my sketchbook’s inside cover like everyone else has so far and he was SO excited and went “you sketch???” with the most enthralled inflection. and then we also talked about interracial relations on stage and jack kelly being black. and i’m really not sure how many people have actually asked him or told him how much it meant, because he was very ready to talk about it, which is quite bittersweet.

that’s all i have rn it’s late :( see y’all soon

[moonlitluka]

GRAB MY HAND pt 1

Y/N takes Anika’s place in the apartment attack (also Tara’s spot in the core four) | Chad Meeks-Martin x Reader | fluff

I was standing in the kitchen watching as Chad stirred our dinner. He would occasionally look at me as if he was waiting for me to say something.

“I think you should get out of the city,” I burst out “just you know considering what happened to you last time…I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to leave.”

He dropped the spoon and turned to face me. “That’s very thoughtful of you but I’m not going anywhere.” He said giving me a slight smile. I hesitantly returned the gesture.

I don’t want him to go but it’s not safe for him to stay. As much as I would miss him it wouldn’t be forever just until Ghostface was caught. I was willing to sacrifice however much time it took if it meant he would be safe.

My thoughts were interrupted by fake gagging in the next room. “Ugh will you two just make out already?” Mindy said setting the table. “That is so inappropriate.” Chad replied. “Whatever.” Mindy rolled her eyes before entering the kitchen. “Get it over with!”

Sam followed her after handing Anika some pillows. “Sam we don’t need to stay here-“ Mindy began before Sam cut her off. “Well too bad, I insist. Safety in numbers.”

“This is gonna be fun! A slumber party with the core four!” Chad said smiling and leaning against the counter. “Core four..?” Sam said confused.

“Did you just give us a nickname?” I said cringing. “I sure did! I mean we’ve been through a lot together I figured it’s only fitting. Plus I think it sounds cool.” He said shrugging.

“That’s debatable.” Mindy said. “Very debatable.” I said laughing. “You can’t just give yourself a nickname dingus!” And there it is, the twins banter never failed to put a smile on my face.

“Sure I can dingus, I just did. Core four! Up top!” He said extending his hand to Mindy for a high five. “No.”

“Down low!” He then turned to me. “Get that away from me.” I said denying him.

“Please for the love of god!” He begged Sam to not leave him hanging. “Don’t do it.” Mindy said with a laugh.

“You know I’d actually like a little more respect and support-“ Chad started ranting before Anika called for us.

“Guys! What the hell?” She said turning up the tv. Oh my god. The guy on the news was genuinely accusing Sam of being Ghostface. What is wrong with everyone in this city? Do they all just believe everything they read online?

I couldn’t help but notice Sam’s face fall as she started to walk into the dining room. I followed and sat next to her. I lightly grabbed her hand and began speaking. “I know I can’t relate to what you’re going through, but I just want you to know that I’m sorry you’re going through this. But you’re not alone, I’m here if you need to talk.”

Sam sighed and put her head down. “I know I shouldn’t care what people think but it just sucks being this hated.” She said wiping a tear away. I felt a frown form on my face. I felt horrible for Sam. She’s been through so much and all she got in return was harassment from losers on the internet.

“Hey,” I heard Chad soft voice enter the room. “Just a reminder, not a single person in this room hates you.” He said as Mindy and him sat across from us at the table.

“We’ve all been through some fucked up stuff and we’re all coping with it differently.” I couldn’t help but stare at him.

“We all moved here together for one specific reason…we’re a team.” He said giving Sam a reassuring smile.

“We are!” Mindy joined in. “The core fuckin four!” She said pointing her finger at all of us. “Thank you!” Chad said laughing. “Ugh I hate myself for that.” Mindy said cringing at herself.

“I can’t believe you said it.” I said laughing and covering my mouth. “C’mon Y/N say it!” Chad teased. “No I’m not gonna say it not now not ever”

He leaned over the table to make eye contact with me as if he was trying to will me to say it. I smiled. “I mean yes we’re a team but I’m not calling us that.”

“I’ve been sleeping with cute boy across the hall.” Sam blurted out randomly. We all stopped and looked at her. The room was silent for a few moments before Mindy slapped the table. “BOOM!” “I fucking knew it!”

“I knew it, I knew it, I knew it.” I said clapping. Mindy agreed, “totally called it!” And for the first time that evening Sam laughed.

I was happy that even if it was only for a moment, Sam could laugh and feel happy. I hadn’t seen her smile in a while. It made me feel better.

“I feel like we should high five or something” I suggested. “Core four high five baby let’s go!” Chad said initiating the high five.

“Still not calling it that but we can do the high five.” I said lacing my fingers with his before Mindy and Sam placed their hands on top of ours. I felt his gaze burning into the side of my head.

The two girls took their hands off ours but I let mine linger on Chads a little longer. I never knew what was going to happen so any chance I could bask in his touch just a little longer was a chance I took. He was still looking at me with those eyes. Except this time I had enough confidence to look back at him.

We only broke eye contact when Sams phone rang. “Oh!” I said grabbing her phone and showing the twins who was calling. The teasing was all from a place of love and Sam knew that.

“All right I’ll call him back.” She said with a smile. Soon moans broke through the apartment. “Ew seems Quinn and her gentleman caller are back at it again” I said putting my head in my hands.

“Wait a second,” I said turning to Sam. “If you’re sleeping with cute boy across the hall that means everyone here is getting some but me” I laughed at myself. “Damn totally doesn’t hurt my confidence”

Sam and Mindy laughed but I noticed Chad only seemed to look at me. Strange usually he’s the first to laugh at dirty jokes.

“Well I could think of someone who’d be interested-“ Mindy started before Chad elbowed her. What was that about?

Before I had the chance to ask all of our phones went off. We all exchange a look before opening the message.

End of part 1

[yallemagne]

Having to pause every five seconds in this episode to scream at VH for being such an old bitch.

First up the newspaper: You're telling me none of these kids are capable of pronouncing the word "Beautiful", really? Were newspapers really like this in Victorian England? Just constantly misspelling something as a bit to make fun of people's pronunciations? That's obnoxious. Also damn the writer of this article fucking hates kids, damn.

Our correspondent naïvely says that even Ellen Terry could not be so winningly attractive as some of these grubby-faced little children pretend—and even imagine themselves—to be.

calm the fuck down, they're playing pretend. how are you seriously gonna get pissy with children roleplaying as a "Beautiful Lady".

Mina worries VH will blame her for Lucy's death and I screamed SHUT UP MINA. Oh my god Mina literally what. No, you are not even at partial fault for what happened to your ADULT FRIEND while you were away with your HUSBAND. Read my post on the matter, Mina. I swear.

VH: "Hey, can you tell me what happened in Whitby?"

Mina: "Of course."

VH: "Are you sure? Women are too stupid to remember important details."

What the fuck is wrong with you sir. What the fuck. What the fuck is wrong with you. God, he's so fucking annoying. Oh my goooood. You came to her to ask questions, you are not allowed to follow up your plea for answers with "but I don't expect you to know anything since you're a ditzy woman."

And instead of ripping him a new one, Mina tells him she has a journal. But he already knows about the journal. He knows that Mina was writing everything down the same way he knows Lucy started a diary to imitate Mina. So, it's even more than "Your puny woman brain can't possibly hold that much information" it's that AND "I know you keep a journal, but women only write silly women things in their journals, nothing worth reading"

rrrrgrrrr i'm fucking strangling him to DEATH bro

Mina gets to prank him a bit, but the message doesn't stick. Giving him her shorthand diary is a "don't fuck with me" that he greets with "haha can you read to me like a woman does?"

And the entire time, when he isn't insulting her for being a woman, he's trying to flatter her because he thinks she's a vain child. He did the same with Lucy. Mina tells him off passively "you don't know me" and he insists that he's studied the behaviour of men and women, so he does know her, and any drop-of-the-hat judgement he makes of her is fuckin God's word.

ugh there's just too much to say. Van Helsing's benevolent sexism is practically more offensive to read than malicious sexism. At least malicious sexists can admit they're bags of dicks.

[rukunas]

ahhh i’m obsessed with the whole sukuna and yuji fic u wrote djdj the way sukuna would tell him the dirtiest things about you whenever you were around, just to frustrate him more and get yuji to make a move, ugh and he’d interrupt mid sex session djdj complaining he’s not doing it right, ugh i need this sukuna interrupting didjd

warning: i love yuji but this fic does him dirty. i think he’d eat pussy good but not for the sake of this scenario LMAO

“does this feel good?”

yuji lifts his head, his pink hair flopping over his forehead as his eyebrow rises with the question. his fingers gently push in and out of your pussy— too gently, as if afraid that you would break.

you nod, biting your tongue to hold back the truth.

it doesn’t feel bad, but definitely not the best. you don’t blame him— it’s only his second time. but you find yourself thinking of previous lovers, how they’d flick and suck at your clit, tease the hell out of you.

you’d tell him, really. but when he looks up at you with wide brown eyes, the words falter.

you hate yourself for it, but you fake out a moan too. “feels so good!”

he bends down again, tongue lightly lapping against your cunt. you do your part, acting to please him. “ohhh, yuji!” your fingers thread his hair. “‘m so close!”

his shoulders shake. you wonder if he’s close too, but a laugh interrupts your thoughts— one that makes your spine shiver, one that reminds you of your darkest fears, one that makes you want to slide down onto your knees and obey.

when yuji lifts his head, it’s not him. your hands fall to your sides when you see the markings on his face and his sharp teeth.

“you know what i hate about you humans?” sukuna sneers, his hot palms resting on your knees. “how pathetic you all are when you lie.”

“w-what are you talking about?” you whisper, feeling your stomach pang with fear as sukuna licks his lips, staring down at your swollen clit.

he lowers his head so that his nose just brushes your folds, inhaling deeply. you’d close your legs if his grip wasn’t bruising. “don’t lie. it’ll be worse for you if you do.”

“please, i—” sukuna bites on your clit. “ah!”

he lowers his head, pushing his tongue into you without any warning. it slides in smoothly, the tip of it prodding at your walls. it’s so unnatural, how it fills you up as good as a cock would, especially when he’s able to flick it right up against that sweet spot inside of you. “o-oh! oh my god!”

“that’s right.” sukuna snarls, his nose pressing into you, his fingers pinching at your clit. “call for your god. call for me.”

“m-more!” you whine, feeling yourself getting closer.

in response, sukuna’s thumb roughly draws circles into you, forcing your spine to curve from his movements. “pathetic fuckin’ slut. are you going to cum?”

you nod without hesitation and he laughs gleefully. “he’s watching, y’know. he sees how greedy you’re being with me. sees how much of a fucking slut you are. you didn’t even raise a fight when you saw me between your legs, isn’t that right? you wanted me to eat you, didn’t ya?”

you press your eyes shut in embarrassment, hands coming to cover your face. but his upper two hands— you didn’t even see him transform— are quick to grapple them away.

sukuna lifts his head, sticking three fingers into your wet core and stroking your walls. “answer me.”

“y-yes! w-wanted you to fuck me!”

“tell the boy how much better i am than he is.”

you almost bite your tongue, but sukuna makes you obey, his fingers scissoring you oh so well. “you’re so much better than yuji is.”

“and tell him that you are mine.”

“i am yours.”

he grins, a sight that makes you scream as he batters your pussy with his fingers alone, going at a pace that is seemingly impossible but he manages to keep the tempo. with his other hand, he pinches your clit.

“cum.”

the command is simple, and you follow. the feeling ripples across your body in the most intense way possible. your hands flail pathetically, nails scraping against his biceps— “s-sukuna!”

“that’s right.” he murmurs, watching you intensely. “mine. not his.”

[awigglycultist]

NPMD thoughts

Omg Richie's screams

Poor Richie my beloved

He's dead <3

Oh wait Ruth's headgear is missing in this song

Grace covering her mouth!

STEPH! PETE! <3

WHAT A START

Sycamore! We really need to know more about them

Rip Peter

I love the running in Literal Monster

Out first Max saying Bitch incident!

Get him up! Get this fucker up!!

I love being able to properly see everyone's facial expressions

I hate Solomon so much

Steph is very stupid for putting her hand above her phone as it's about to me smashed but also I'd probably do the same

"this projects on thermodynamics, what the fuck are you talking about?"

I literally love Ruth's, Pete's and Richie's friendship so much

"What was I like when she touched your arm? Did you cum!?"

"Pete silence your phone in the library!" you guys have been screaming this whole time but ok

NANI?

Ugh Pete you are cooler than you think you are!

Love Max finishing the "woah oh oh oh"

"Had to sell your bowtie to feed your fuckin family?"

Omg Pete's breathing and whining while Max is monologuing <3

"now say your fucking prayers bitch!" "-amen!" is still such a good transition

"mom will you pass the buttstuff?" "I just want some head and butter" "bread and buttstuff" still get me

"I love... Jesus <3 :)"

Dirty Girl should not be so good

"WHO ON OCCASION GETS DIRTY!"

Me trying to watch this and imagine watching with my dad to figure out the appropriateness and if gonna have to skip past parts

Ugh Pete <3

Ugh Steph caring about Pete so much despite knowing him for one day <3

Hatchettown notfi!

#pottypants let's get it trending

IT'S BULLY THE BULLY TIME!!!

Love hoe you can see Steph slowly getting into it

Beans cool? Excellent!

Pete's and Richie's finger fun moment!

"who was that?" "my boyfriend!" "sounded like a telemarketer" "okay my ex boyfriend"

Love the screams after "you kinda look like that homeless man from downtown"

"fucking useless Pete!"

"no he thinks the ghost is real he's just really fucking brave"

"I am Jägerman! I am God! Go Nighthawks!"

Skele'on

The little bit of info that Max's dad would call him a cuck and the fact that his bullying likely comes from a lot more trauma with his dad

It's the nicest thing anyone's ever done for him :(

Rip the glow in the dark skeleton costume

"this is Hatchetfield, people go missing everyday!"

Love Kyle and Brenda, what a supportive couple

"this is really your C+" "oh, Steph, you can keep it :)"

"with consent of cour cause we care!"

FUCK YOU CLIVESDALE!!!

Zeke the fighting Nighthawk like Ezekiel from Perky's Buds! Did Ekekiel name himself after Hatchetfield's mascot?

Love the audience cheering after "fuck Clivesdale fuck em straight to hell!"

Richie struggling with costume is so good

"I love being alive!"

God the costume and makeup up close! So good!!!

Smoke club!

Richie's fall is so good!!!

Jon's singing is seriously so good in npmd

And god Will is incredible

Yup Mark & Karen were just so wild at 18

"you don't say, you don't say. I'm be down there in a jiffy" "what'd they did dad?" "they didn't say"

Jeff voice over cameo!

Davis!

Love that Grace calls the cops pigs

Davis and Virginia!

Ziggy! Barry! Charlie!

Bryce's solo <3

Gerlad!

Love the cameos so much (but also rip Jerry, least it's preserved in the album

The bbq monologues bit is so stupid and so good and funny

Me Barbecue!

I love Trevor I hope we see him again

"I'm my dreams, it's my barbecue!"

Just For Once is so silly and so emotional love it it's underrated

"it fucking worked I'm fucking here he's fucking her!"

Lauren is so good!!

"take a bow, bitch"

"Every citizen of Clivesdale is guilty until proven innocent"

Shapiro saying she found the wwjd bracelet in the principal's office really got me the first time

"it's God plan! And now he's leaving me out to dry! Do something you son of a bitch!"

PAUL & EMMA!!!!

The knowledge of what card Jon hands Lauren makes this scene better

"I have been waiting for what feels like 5 fucking years and I still haven't gotten my hot chocolate!"

Emma spitting in the coffee!

Rip "women shoe"

AHHH IF I LOVED YOU!!!

"Leave room for Jesus!"

"she's bisexual and dead where else would she be!"

Rip Angela's fall

"get your hands out of your pocket! Put your hands down! He's going for a gun!"

The scream!

Also the audience screaming during this entire scene from Paul's & Emma's entrance to Emma screaming, so valid and great

"don't comfort her she's fucking weird"

I hate him but we absolutely need to know more about Solomon, how do the Mayor's learn so much

The black book! The nightmare time theme!

And another reason we need to know more about Solomon, why tf did he have the black book and what did he do with it

Max's one liners are so great

"on the ground bitch I'm a cop!"

"are you a women of faith?" "catholic" "I'll take that as a no"

"there's something deeply wrong with this whole town" yeah there sure is

Pete saying he has no idea what he's doing when he checks for Shapiro's pulse is such a great way of keeping it unknown if she's alive or dead

AAAHHHH THE SUMMONING

"t'noy karaxis" particularly scratches my brain

AHHH THE LORDS IN BLACK

I am a bit sad you can't see all the dance moves at the same time and you so you can't really see them changing dances with each other but also the close ups are so cool and very fitting for the scene!

Jon putting his fingers together so it's reminiscent of the doll only having three is such a cool choice

GOD FUCKING DAMMIT JOEY RICHTER WHY DO YOUR EMOTIONAL PERFORMANCES HAVE TO BE SO GOOD

I WAS RIGHT I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR CAITIA REPRISE

They both do a great job during this and I NOT OKAY

Max's fucking beat boxing

"so you do know the bible!"

This is scene is seriously so crazy

Graces entrance afterwards with the cigarette is so great and Max's entrances afterward laying on the bench is so great

The spin!

The lighting!!!

Homecoming time!

Someone remind me to add Joey in best of you to the air guitar thread

And that's it. That's where ends :)

Grace is so crazy and I love her

[degreeofdisorder]

young royals s3e3 episode reaction

episode 3 is where everything always turns to shit so I'm super not looking forward to this lmfao

ohoho the queen of sweden is having a nervous breakdown. so relatable of her.

I'm lowkey also having a breakdown over wille immediately going into prince mode just bc his mom isn't doing well.

"why do you think I didn't tell you anything? because you wouldn't be able to handle it" NNNNNOOOOOOOO

oh my god that one hit WAY too hard. I can't deal with the mommy issues today.

ugh deeply agreeing with wille. simon needs to lock his social media and throw his phone away. he's starting to stress me the fuck out.

"both for me and the people around me" oh that's... quite the sentence. I know simon just got sucker punched by the fact that it's always gonna be like this

"all I want is to be with you" well you can't!

bro I hate teenagers so fuckin much lmfao

NOT BORIS WANTING TO PSYCHOANALYZE AUGUST

that was psychic warfare from wille idc

"he's decided that I'm evil" lmao you are

"I don't see the point in being nice if he's never gonna forgive me" "well, sometimes being nice to others can make you feel very good" JDKFJDLFJDKFJDKFDJKDOGIDL BORIS LOVE OF MY LIFE

THAT IS SO SHADYYYYYY LMFAO

I genuinely cannot stand vincent. if there's anyone in that school who's legit evil it's gotta be vincent.

oh. yeah. I'm feeling murderous.

fuck you country of sweden you know what you did.

FREDRIKA TYING UP HER HAIR TOO WHEN THE HOUSEMASTER CALLS FELICE OUT OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOD

god. teenage girls make the world go round.

NOT WITH THE SCHOOL INSPECTORS PRESEEEEENTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

NOOOOO SKRKSJRLSKFLSKFLSKDLSKDLD

YOU TWO KEEP REHEARSING

NOT PLAYING A SINGLE KEY AND HUMMING SIFKDLFKSLFKSLFKSLFKDLFKDLFF

oh my god my baby boys

it's the fact that them being so public means that not one (1) person in that room believed they were "rehearsing" jdkfjdlfjdlfjdl

the crown prince alone in a soundproof room with his boyfriend? sure.

god that was HILARIOUS

"I just wish I could get a single moment with you without getting interrupted" [get interrupted]

cinema

of course vincent is going to LA. my bro is going to be an oscar winner in no time, given all the dramatics.

oh

oh sweet jesus

simon, this is NOT the time or place to die on the labor movement hill

oh god

man being a teenager was so exhausting I'm so glad I don't have to do anything like that again

when they eat the rich I hope vincent is first in the grill

I hope felice singlehandedly closed the school lmao

I don't wanna like the whole sara and micke thing I really don't but UGH it's so sweet.

oh

OH

oh he's not is he

IS HE FUCKING

BROOOOOOOOOOO THERE'S NO FUCKING WAY

"he seems nice" oh august you are so clueless

this isn't happening skfkdkgkdkflf

oh my god what is it with royal boys and going "you're the only one I can talk to" y'all can afford a therapist can't you

NOT THE BAKING OHHHHH MY BABIES

"you may have inherited my diagnoses, sara, but you're not me" oh fuck

bro I am like. super into sara and micke hashing shit out, neurodivergently

I can't take wille seriously in the chorus. I cannot. he's so funny

oh god sara is coming back

oh fuck me up I love it when they're all sun kissed and beautiful and have nice lil conversations in front of everyone bc they're boyfriends publicly ohohoho

oh

oh my god

oh is that gonna be the hallway scene

not august waving at sara??? bro get up????

omg the looks from stella and fredrika were SCATHING

not them skipping and swinging their hands together you guys I'm losing my whole damn mind it's getting bad it's getting so bad

WHOOOOOOOREEEEESSSSSSS

OOHHH MY GOD

holy fuck that was....... quite the scene huh

um

let me rewind just now for a lil bit

for science

my brothers in christ you are sluts.

something abt them getting to have slutty slutty sex and finishing off with an I love you heals something in me that has been broken since 2021 ngl

like look at them! they're my boys!!! they're in love and they get to have somewhat public (bc like, a hallway? really?) sex bc they're together and everyone knows!!! they love each other and they can express that in a physical form!!!!! my little strumpets!!!!!!!

ah. fucking figures, huh

of course, thanks micke

oh they're in the literal and metaphorical afterglow!!!!! I love this for them

oh that's not a great train of thought to have after sex now is it

"you can trust me" wille, my love my darling, I love you, truly, from the bottom of my heart, but can he? can he really?

oh that's an actually genius move to show both sides of the coin

I do think simon probably should not be there. son's gonna get too much attention

oh I just remembered the episode description a hahahahahahahaahahahahahaha ha oh I don't want to watch

that was precious but I swear to god simon think with your brain for once aaaaaaaaaa FUCK

great now she just posted his location. and he also fully reposted it didn't he

is he genuinely that dumb like at this point even if you're not famous by proxy you still should know not to post your live location?????? Simon. please.

oh right I forgot the monarchy can't be seen involved with that...... I was more worried abt his safety ldjfldjfldkf

oh

oh no

I was right to worry about his safety

FUUUUUUCK

ugh

[saltygilmores]

I Found A Small Archive of Super Old Interviews With Milo And Here's Another Incredible One

May 10, 2002

Milo Ventimiglia is burning in the minds of teen girls everywhere due to his role as Jess on the surprise hit series, "Gilmore Girls". What may be a surprise to his fans however, is that he has quite the knack for using the 'love them or hate them' four-letter words, something that I am personally a big fuckin' fan of. (Ok, so that's using six letters, but you get my point!)

Don't let my swearing take away from Milo the actor though, because he is the real deal. So much so that Warner Brothers paid him to NOT work for a whole year. Does that sound a little confusing? Well, it did to us as well, so we went ahead and had Milo give us the lowdown.

JB: How are you?

MV: Ugh. I'm fuckin' wrecked! We had a wrap party last night. I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do anything? But I bowled like a crazy muther.

JB: (Laughter) So it was a long night?

MV: Yeah it was a long night! (Laughter)

JB: And nothing hurts more than an early morning interview.

MV: Actually this isn't too early. I got back last night and saw that I had the interview in the morning. I woke up like half an hour ago and my publicist said the interview was pushed back by an hour. I was just like, "Great" and I really didn't have any idea what was going on. I got up and I checked the fax and saw the interview was bumped, so I went back to bed.

JB: I admire your perseverance.

MV: (Laughter) Thanks, man.

JB: So shooting is done for the year!

MV: Yeah. We wrapped up last Friday. I have a nice three and a half months off. I feel like I'm back in school. I felt like saying, "Have a bitching summer and see you next Fall!"

JB: "Please sign my yearbook." (Laughter)

MV: I swear to God that's what it feels like. It's crazy.

JB: Anything planned for the hiatus?

MV: So far I have no work lined up, but I'd really love to continue working. As of right now though, nothing.

JB: Enjoy the time off!

MV: Yeah! I'm sure I'll find something to do. Some kind of trouble to get into. I just bought a house, so I'm remodeling that. I'm doing a lot of handy work around that place.

JB: Some exciting summer Home Depot trips are in your future.

MV: Oh man! There is a 24-hour Home Depot right near my house.

JB: There are 24-hour Home Depots? That's crazy!

MV: Yeah! So at three in the morning I'll be banging away and turning on my circular saw? Just going for it.

JB: Tell me about your WB holding deal? What exactly did that consist of? Is it that you couldn't go and work for another network?

MV: Basically? yeah! They said, "Here's a lot of money and don't work for anybody else. We don't have anything for you, so you're going to be sitting for awhile." That was an interesting thing.

JB: Was it hard convincing family members that it actually happened? I'd imagine it was difficult to describe to people that you were getting paid to not work?

MV: Not with my family members because they run my books for me, so they saw the checks. Convincing my friends was another a thing. They'd be like, "What are you doing today?" "Well, I think I'm going to go to the beach." They'd be like, "Dude, you said that like two months ago?what are you really doing today?" "I think I'm going to go to the beach." (Laughter) And then the next day I'd be like, "I think I'm going to go to Europe." I was just out of my head bored. Warner Brothers didn't have anything for me to do, so I had to go to do something. The first month or two of being in the deal was fine?I was just hanging out around in LA, going to my parent's house in Orange County or catching up with old friends. Six months into things I was like, "Fuck this shit?I've got to go do something!"

JB: So it lasted for quite some time?

MV: Oh man, it was like a year. They wanted to hold me for almost like two years, but my management team said no.

JB: Could you at least do film?

MV: Yeah. I could do film. In the course of the contract, I did book a film and they did release me to do a guest spot on CSI. They also let me do a commercial or two. There were opportunities but they were getting ready to put me in a show. The holding deal kind of had nothing to do with "Gilmore Girls".

Pilot season came around and I was only reading for the studio's pilots because the contract was with the studio and not the network. I was reading for other pilots and nothing was clicking. I read for "Smallville" and all of these different pilots and for one reason or another I just wasn't getting them. The producers were like, "He's great, but we're not interested." I read for a pilot that was outside of my contract and the producers were really excited about me and Warner Brothers was going to let me out of the contract. At the last minute they said "no" and sent me in for this one pilot and then I tested for it. Next thing I know I was in a meeting with the casting directors for "Gilmore Girls" and the part was a guest spot with the possibility of returning. It wasn't as a series regular or anything. They brought me back to the producers the day of my studio test and that night they called and said, "Hey, we want you to be a series regular." That kind of threw an interesting twist on the contract because it was geared towards putting me in a new show, not an existing show.

JB: Prior to that or even now, do you get yourself worked up about pilot season?

MV: I think this is the first season that I really didn't think about it. I didn't have to audition because I was on a show and I knew we were coming back. I had a contract so now I could focus on my work. I've talked to some of my friends who are actors and they are going crazy and here I am at the craft service table. It was nice to not have to worry about that. Pilots are stressful as it is because you don't know if they'll get picked up. There are some like "Smallville" where they are filming the pilot, knowing that they were picked up for 22 episodes. I'm sure it makes you feel a little more comfortable.

JB: Have you found yourself getting noticed more?

MV: Occasionally. I'm still a nobody, which I enjoy because I can just go about my business. Time to time I'll get somebody who says, "Are you that guy on Gilmore Girls?" They freak out for a second. I was out to dinner with some friends the other night and some girl walked up to me. She was probably about 15 or something. We were finished eating and I was sitting back. The girl walks up and asks, "Excuse me?are you from Gilmore Girls?" I say yes and she asks if her sister can have my autograph. I say, "Yeah that's cool, but where is your sister?" "She's over there but she's a little embarrassed." I said, "Do you want me to go meet her?" I got up and went to meet her. You can tell the people that are genuinely excited about meeting someone who's on TV and I try to relate to them as, "I'm just a person and I'm not larger than life!" It's fun for them though and in a way it's kind of fun for me.

JB: Since jumping in "Gilmore Girls", you've appeared in your share of teen oriented magazines. Have you been the subject of jokes because of it?

MV: Oh my God! Yeah! Oh yeah! One of my oldest friends used to rip on me when we were in college. He's always known that I wanted to be an actor and when we got to the age where we understood the publicity end of it, he would give me crap about Tiger Beat and Teen Beat. I'd be like, "I just want to act and I'm not going to go that whole route." Now my mom was in a grocery store and pulled up a Tiger Beat and my picture was in it. I was like, "You've got to be fuckin' kidding me!" Then I popped up in Teen Beat and others. It's crazy. Hopefully other things will come up. I did a thing for Seventeen that comes out this month and just some other random stuff.

JB: They ask those weird, "What's your favorite color?" kind of questions.

MV: Oh my God. Nothing against the magazines because they definitely have their purposes, but I don't want to answer questions like "Do you have a girlfriend" and "What is your favorite color". Answering more adult questions is more intriguing and that's the vibe I'd like to give off.

(Silence)

MV: My favorite color is black by the way!