#i just wish it wasnt so repetitive

[emulation-0]

im a little sad today

[medicasino]

vent below so dont feel like you have to read this 👍i simply have no where else to put this bc i dont want to Bother My Friends

god i wish i could just kill myself but i like. cant. there's too much stopping me. but i dont want to do anything anymore. i dont want to deal with this constant misery of being trapped in a brain with a death wish hellbent on making me want to die horrifically. i wish people just hated me outright so i had a good excuse to just call it quits on life and die

[mysicklove]

𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝐈𝐍 𝐀 𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐘

DAY 31: MASTURBATION

With: Izuku Midoriya

Word Count: 1.5k

Warnings: subish! Izuku, fem/afab reader, izuku masturbates to your voicemail and pretends to fuck you, reader calls him baby, and he calls u hun, needy izuku

A/N: masturbation fics are so fun to write for no reason. anyways, my last kinktober fic. crazy. it doesnt feel this way cause i wrote it halfway through lol.

Izuku was left alone for too long. On the verge of three weeks to be exact.

He wasn't left completely alone, of course. He was just overseas, on an important mission. He was separated from you, but that to his love-sick brain, meant he was left alone. His sleep schedule is all messed up from the times he stayed up late at night to wish you goodmorning, or the times where he woke up super early to catch you before you ate dinner. 

He missed you, an ungodly amount. When he comes home to his luxury hotel, and flops onto the bed, the only thing he can think about is you. What it would feel like to wraps his arms around you, and melt in your warmth. The way your fingers would run through his hair, and comfort him from all he did that day.

Of course he had those innocent, romantic thoughts most of the time, but somehow one way or another those fantasies began to change. The touches reach lower, your words begin to drip with honey, and your lips seem to be more passionate, desperate even. Until five out of the seven days, he daydreams about fucking you. 

He lays against the bed frame, shirtless, and dick pulled out of his boxers. The trip back to the hotel was long, and he's been thinking about doing this for the past hour now. He prepared everything ahead of time, because if he was doing something as pathetic as this, at least do it right.

The lights were dimmed, and his eyelids are drooping, exhausted from the day. He slowly reaches toward the nightstand and grabs a couple of tissues, setting them down next to him. Then with a sigh, he puts his phone up to his ear, and brings his hand to his cock. 

He gulps when he hears your voice, wishing desperately that you weren't asleep. Its got to be around 5 am by that time, and of course he wished he was patient enough to wait a couple hours for you to talk to him. But, he was desperate, and the voicemail you left him a couple hours earlier did the job.

“Hey baby,” Your voice broadcast, and immediately he seems to melt. His eyes fall shut and his hands begins to move up and down his half hard cock. He hums in reply, not caring if you cant hear him. “I miss you. Saw a kid walk by me with your merch on, made me smile,” You say, your voice slightly muffled from a task you must be doing. 

He huffs a laugh, head falling to the side. “Yeah?” He breathes, thumb rubbing at the tip, and then falling back down to his shaft in a repetitive motion. You continue on about your day, mentioning nothing too important, just how you went grocery shopping and a nice walk after work. “You shouldnt be working. Can take care of you,” Izuku mumbles, eyes peering open just slightly to watch his movements.

His cock was on full display now, the tip a pretty shade of pink, and beginning to leak. You always called it pretty. A strange thing to say about a penis, but he soaked up the praise, taking pride in his cock now. 

The thought made his mind wander. Would you praise him for what he was doing now? He wasnt supposed to touch himself without you, but its been three weeks, you have got to understand. Were you touching yourself thinking about him? The thought sends a thrilling shiver down his spine.

Your voice was now a background noise, just listening to the tone, the sound of it, but nothing of what you were saying. Maybe you were cooing at him. Telling him how good he is doing. Or maybe you were calling him a pervert for doing something so gross without you knowing. He lets out a shaky moan, mewling out and picking up the pace of his hand. 

“I miss you,” He warbles into the phone, on top of your speech. What were you talking about now? A dog you saw? Nothing important. Why weren't you touching yourself to his voice? He would die for an audio of that. Or even an audio of where you give him directions of how to do touch himself correctly.

No Izuku, slow down. Don't hurt yourself, baby. Your voice clouds his mind, and he nods, peering back to his cock and slowing his hand down. Thats it. Tighten your hand, and focus on the tip. He obeys, moving his hand up to the head, and making small pumps there. “S-Sensitive there,” He groans to the empty hotelroom, shaking his head from side to side when his heartbeat begins to pick up.

“Went into Victoria's Secret today,” You hum, and his eyes widen, attention snapping back to your voicemail. He quickly turns up the volume and pressing the phone closer to his ear. “Bought something you’ll love. Red is your favorite, yeah?”

Lewd images flash through his head of dark red lingerie sets and he nods. “Fuck. Please,” He moans, wishing he was there to pick it out with you. His dick twitches, and a glob of precum leaks out. Green eyes flicker to it, and he uses his thumb to swirl it around the head, flinger glazing over the slit. “Wanna see,” Izuku pants, growing hot.

You seem to have heard his reply and it makes him whine. “You don't get to see till you get home. A nice reward for doing so good all this time you are away,” You purr, making a short kissing noise into the mic and laughing.

His eyebrows furrow at the possibilities and his mind drifts off from your voice again. Suddenly he is there with you, his rough hands trailing up and down your body. The dark lingerie looks perfect against your skin tone, and his mouth waters at the sight. Well, look how needy you are Deku. Do you want to fuck me that bad?

He nods his head frantically, hand unconsciously picking up the pace. “Please. Please, beggin’ you,” he chants under his breath, his back slightly arching off the frame. He dully notices that the voicemail has ended, but doesnt pay attention to it, too immersed in the movie playing in his head.

His mind cuts the scene forward, growing too impatient and desperate as his orgasm begins to approach. You are under him, sending scratch marks down his back while moaning out. His thrusts are frantic, and he tries to pretend that his hand is you. Its not the same, but it will do. 

“Am I doing good?” He mumbles, dropping his phone onto the bed and resting the other hand on his thigh. You nod at him, kissing his cheek with redden cheeks, and lazy grin. A view he has seen so many times that he has a perfect mental image of it. 

So good, Izuku. You wanna cum inside?

He moans, louder than he should, considering the thin walls, but he doesnt care at the moment. He never gets to cum inside – this was something he was waiting to hear. “Fuck. Pleaseeee,” He whimpers, eyebrows furrowing and hand frantically moving up and down. His cock is lubed up with pre, and its easier for his hand to move now. 

He climbs closer and closer to his high and now hes hunched slightly over on himself. Suddenly, he hears his phone ringing, cutting him out of his perfect daydream. Just a couple of seconds, he just needs a couple seconds more of fucking you, and then he can take this call. He whines slightly, and peers over at it, not stopping his movements.

When he sees your name his eyes light up, and he grabs the phone and brings it to his ear immediately. His hands makes a lewd squelching noise, but he too fucked out to care if you hear.

A couple of seconds go by, and he breathes into the mic, waiting. And then he hears a groggy, “Hey baby,” and he cums on the spot. Groaning into the phone without a care as cum spills out on his hands and his whole body shakes. 

Another second goes by, as you wait silently on your side, confused on what was happening, but too sleepy to put two and two together. Izuku's chest rises and falls with every breath, and he stares at his cum covered hand, trying not to let out a sound of complaint when he realized he forgot to cum into the tissue.

He blinks a couple times, exhausted but glowing. “Hey hun. Was just thinkin’ bout you,” He hums, grinning at his sticky hand and closing his eyes when he hears your girlish giggle.

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[liesandbrokenhearts]

Just one of the things I wish young girls would release themselves from the shackles of is being bound by fitting into specific “aesthetics” that seem to be ever changing and non repetitive in nature or cycling like traditional fashion trends because you absolutely can wear any style you wish, and you can mix pieces and have fun with different shapes from different eras without worrying about deviating from the style you wish to emulate on a girl you saw create an Instagram account off of, because versatility is a blessing not a curse. I just wish the hyper- categorization of trendy clothing being attached to certain shallow “aesthetics” wasnt so definitive as well. Everyone participates in trends and there is nothing inherently wrong with wanting to achieve a certain “look” but please have fun and mix things because that’s where genius ideas are created

[nd-babblinggoblinfromthevoid]

I wish that autism wasn't so heavily looked down upon/ignored/disrespected when I was growing up.

I was a "devil child", "handful", "problem".

When in reality if even minute changes were made in my environment and how my own family interacted with me, I would have flourished so much more.

I heavily stimmed using music. The repetitive beats and heavy bass was my thing. So when my mom wanted to punish me for something, one of the first things she'd do was take away my ipod/mp3 whatever I had. WORST thing was when she ONLY took my (very specific) headphones.

To her, it was taking away something fun. A luxury item. A toy basically.

But to me, it was taking away a very heavily ingrained stim that I NEEDED to do, and could not do without very specific criteria (specific headphones and a specific playlist/style of music)

So of course I would become horribly disregulated. Which I'd then have to attempt to mask/or recluse to avoid her so she wouldn't see how bad it unraveled me.

Because to her, being disregulated/unraveled was "acting up", "catching an attitude", "being disrespectful/rude".

Gods. Looking back I truly hate how she did me wrong in that way. Not just my stim but EVERYTHING. All my needs were either dismissed or half-met.

She is one of those people who thinks sure adhd/autism exists but not in HER family. Not in HER children. She even tried to blame it on the father of her children and it couldn't possibly have had anything to do with her.

..... we not only ALL have different fathers, but after observing both memories of her and her now, she is ALSO autistic and in total denial.

I definitely still harbor resentment because of that. She had me "evaluated". Once. At a time where they still heavily leaned on the male criteria for adhd, and autism wasnt really addressed/acknowledged unless it was severely debilitating. But also, by the time she had me evaluated, I'd already spent a few years (unknowingly) masking due to peers and family creating that need. So the conclusion was "there MIGHT be something divergent about her but we couldnt say for sure at this time" and she took that as "nope she's good, just a problem child. Carryon." Never again to be addressed.

She barely acknowledged that one of my brothers (previously a sister) was diagnosed adhd.

She only acknowledged another brother's adhd&autism diagnosis because the school he went to was very accommodating and insisted that he be evaluated and guess what.

Once he was diagnosed, and they rearranged his class schedules to fit his needs, he did a 180 and graduated top of his class. THRIVED. I both LOVE that he got that and HATE that I never did. I barely got through school.

It wasn't for lack of love of learning. I just, learned different, but was ALSO heavily overloaded with how crammed my courses were. I always wonder if I'd gotten the same accommodations, would I have thrived? Would school have been a drastically different/positive experience/memory for me? I'll never know. Because my mother was so against the idea that anything was divergent about me and absolutely mentally stuffed me into her little idea of an ideal neurotypical child that I never had a chance...

Now that I know I'm also AuDHD, like most of my siblings and even an aunt, I feel validated. I had seen vlogs and blogs about people more and more coming out about how they handle life and their coping skills and hacks theyve learned and after starting to apply those to myself... gods I've improved so much.

Don't get me wrong, I still struggle. But now knowing what issues are and how to cope and get around things, I'm a lot better off.

This is only ONE reason of several why my relationship with my mother has gone sour. What's sad is she doesn't really realize it yet? I havent been able to compose myself enough to have THE CHAT.

About how she hurt me a lot. Intentional or not. (Like not knowing taking away my music was taking away a stim) I don't know how to have this chat. Tbh I thought about writing a longass letter. Because in the past whenever she's been confronted about anything she's done wrong, she spirals into defense mode and wont even entertain the conversation beyond that point and you get... nowhere.

So maybe in person the bulk of the talk wont happen. I feel like. I need to hand her a letter. Have her read it. And maybe have a succinct chat before parting ways.

Because I wanted to be close to her for so long, that I either didn't realize or knowingly ignored her problem behaviors and looking back... she just... gods that's a whole other post for the future....

If you've read this far thank you. If you've had similar familial experiences, lmk (if you're comfy)

I just....... *sigh*.... yep.

[sleepysandy]

some thoughts on acftl

just finished an hour ago and i need to vent (spoiler heavy and pretty long)

stuff i liked

apollo pov

unpopular opinion but i do like the idea of an apollo pov. i think it makes sense since there are some plot points that can only be revealed through apollo. however i think the execution could be better.

at first i liked hearing about his messed up thought process and daddy issues but at some point it became repetitive. it all became about keeping evangeline captive and killing jacks which made it obvious he was just obsessed, not loved, with evangeline. i can't decide if i like it bcs it was a sorta parallel to jack and donatella but also made the reveal at the end kinda obvious.

i also expected some sibling angst?? like the brother plot was just brushed off when they were pretty close until they had a falling out then when the brother came back he poisoned him?? i cant remember but the brother tortured him too i think?? the whole anti valor arc group was never brought up again too like...

2. evajacks

they didnt have a lot of scenes together but those scenes were *chefs kiss* i also liked their development. evangeline is jaded from everything going on, she did learn to not be so trusting and really think for herself what she wants. i liked how she didnt lose a lot of her hope and optimism too.

i disagree with reviews saying that jacks wasnt good in this book since he was so different. i think that was a testament on how eva's death really affected him. i actually wasnt convinced that jacks had feelings for eva until she died in tbona so seeing how jacks so despondent and serious in acftl cemented his feelings in my mind. i feel like people would buy jacks' characterization if there were flashbacks to his past and more povs.

stuff i didnt like, its mainly about how many plot points from the previous books werent mentioned at all

i wish they used the previous characters more

kristof knightlinger was kinda hyped in the beginning, like where did he go?? i wished he and eva had at least one together that would plant doubt in eva that apollo was this perfect prince. (i kinda had a problem with the whole memories thing in general, more on that later)

i also thought that the old librarian would be important lol

i wished luc was in the book too :((( eva lost a quite a bit of her pre-north memories so luc wouldve been perfect to bring those memories back since eva did say that luc had been there for her when her dad died. also he couldve mentioned something about marisol since he wouldve been the only one in valorfell in tbona i think.

i wish lala's feelings for dane were explained more. like does she have commitment issues, does she not feel real love anymore since shes a fate, is there something going on with chaos/castor??? i wanna see more of her relationships with the other valors too but i do acknowledge that including all that is too much for a side character

chaos/castor and jacks angst!!!!! the eva and castor interactions were good but like jacks said he became a fate for castor (which is a good insight into jacks character) but i wanted to see how they interacted after castor killed eva. like your have a friend who you kinda cursed to be an immortal so you then become immortal then your friend then kills the love of your life like..... i need to see how that went down. but also your friend's crazy sister is obsessed with you??? to the point that she also curses you??? like give me friendship angst!!!!!! (speaking of, why did lala agree to be a fate too...) (also what happened to the real chaos fate??)

3. jacks past

to jump off the last point, like where were the flashbacks???? i think jacks being serious this book would make a lot more sense for more people if scenes of his friends dying in like one day and the first fox dying from the curse were shown in the book. show how much jacks blames himself with the deaths of his loved ones, thats why he was so desperate to keep eva alive.

4. jacks pov

kinda related but i feel like jacks pov was underutilized. his povs were super short and didnt reveal much about what he was doing away from eva. in contrast to apollos pov where it was shown how he was manipulating eva and the public about jacks but also his relationship wtih the valor family. wished we couldve seen how he uses the scar to know where eva is and he follows her around.

i woudve loved to see more pining from his end too

also i dont think it was ever explained how they have the telepathic link???? and why eva was immune to his powers??? was it love at first sight? it was mentioned how he watched her from the start but was it love??

5. evas family

what was evas dad's secret shop??? like are not supposed to find out?? the clothes shop was even featured in caraval but not here?? also did the mom know about the prophecy?? were the fox and key motifs on her clothes supposed to be a coincidence or bcs of how much she liked the story as a kid?? that would explain the foxes but not the keys...

i kinda wish that eva discovered something about her mom's life in the north. give her more connection to her family and maybe reveal more of her prophecy

6. memory stuff

getting majority of the memories all at once was meh for me. i wish that each side character revealed/triggered memories for eva. like luc could trigger memories about her life in valenda, kristoff for coming to north and becoming apollo's fiance then wife, lala for her curses and apollo hunting her, chaos for the stones and arc stuff so that evas letter to herself revealing her and jacks relationship could be a final piece of the puzzle.

i do like the fact that jacks kept the letter for himself and eva reading the letter didnt make her distrust jacks but bring her memories back.

7. breaking the curse

so did evas love break the curse?? i kinda thought it was leaning towards jacks love that could break the curse since it was mentioned in tbona that jacks doesnt know if he actually loved the fox but there was no big declaration of love from him.... im just confused, happy but confused

i did like the fact that the curse was 'wrong' that it was never about jacks true love but someone who could never love him. altho i have no idea how eva broke that curse and if that means donatella survived that bcs she would never love jacks

so when jacks admitted that he loved eva, did he turn human?? was that why the curse broke???

also the bells werent as important i guess?? i totally thought the bell stuff was gonna come back....

also what was all that about how eva was like the first fox??? i thought while reading that aurora misinterpreted the vision "he'll fall in live with a Fox" that jacks will fall in love a fox girl but in reality a capital f Fox but castor said in tbona that she was similar to the first fox and eva said that the little fox nickname was familiar.....

anyway thats it for now, after i reread my notes from the three books i might add to this. overall, i think the book was ok, but definitely not enough to be an finale especially for a 5 book arc for jacks. i think the book shouldve been a whole lot longer but i kinda feel like garber wanted the length to be similar to the previous books so the end felt pretty rushed. i kinda feel bad that i had more dislikes than likes when i rlly loved the first 2 books so this was so..... i think there were a lot of good ideas but the execution was not it i guess

VERY MUCH DISAPPOINTED THAT JACKS DID NOT SHOOT A SINGLE ARROW

i do get that this is a romance focused trilogy, not a fantasy so you could argue that plot points and lore shouldnt be looked into as much but the relationship and character development of evajacks could be better too... imo it's mostly jacks character that was lacking

also this did feel like a build up for an apollo book but garber said she wont write for this universe for a while so ??? kinda disappointed if there will be an apollo book bcs the amount of apollo chapters screwed jacks over but in the caraval series, the ending focused on the actual main characters at least and not so much on jacks.

[danepopfrippery]

There’s several things I wish Jim Henson lived to see (nvm personal stuff like his fam and friends). The big two are: internet and how beloved Muppet Xmas Carol has become.

Internet: he would’ve fuckin loved it. If u havent read his bio u should its wonderful. He loved tech and cutting thru middle men. He loved doing weird shit for any audience. That man would be like Carl Reiner/Frank Oz/Patrick Stewart all rolled into one and i imagine he’d be the first on shit like tiktok. He would have LOVED IT

Muppet Xmas Carol: by the time Jim died he was in the process of selling the muppets to Disney so he could be free for new things (man hated repetition) and he felt hed become a new walt disney god figure (he hated that) and that his work wasnt being taken srsly, like the muppets just kept being watered down to corporate kid stuff.

Muppet Xmas Carol if I remember right was his idea and he was passionate it be accurate to the book. He wanted to do something new and weird, once again showing his work wasnt just for kids. Considering this film is not only a classic but considered the best and most faithful Dickens adaption i think he would’ve been thrilled. Especially given hardcore dickens fans love it

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

HIIIIHIIIIHIIII. Started reading the alivemanor commentary edition bc i HAVE NOT forgotten i just have a brain made of jelly. i think im going to be doing these two at a time for the formatting differences (typing as i read). i knew of myhouse.wad before going through alivemanor and i hadddd to have another look while reading. a lot the talk of it and house of leaves (and just alivemanor in general) kind of reminds me of the old slenderman args i used to be obsessed with as a kid. i wasn't quite old enough at the time to be involved in the actual arg portions of the series and i dont think they hold up as well now but. still. i noticed it as i was reading but having all of the small points of repetition pointed out is v cool. theres so much thought put into every little piece, its so fascinating to be able to see all of the parts. and all the references i missed, too! lots of religious and mythological things i didnt get my first time around. ur brain is massive giggled at big bill wharton. thats it thats the full thought its perfect. oletta and butcher rose being (not so)distant relatives of wainwright and angel,,,i cant think of it too long i cannot. i wish my borderlands 3 wasnt so busted atm ive been wanting to do another playthrough, especially to see the dlcs…ive only played through them once before in co-op so i didnt focus all that much on everything going on. small note but as a resident feet in the grass bugs guy the description of the spinswath has very much endeared me to the little things. wish they were real. and still wishing we got more eden-6 wildlife than the fucking monkeys and dinosaurs. a spat however sounds hellish. but yeah! i looove seeing the behind the scenes thoughts behind this, and im also going to get to the chapter of jfv you sent me over discord as well. at any time youre allowed to remind me btw i will not get annoyed with you!! its just hard to make myself sit down and read and sometimes i forget

[saint-magpie]

i feel like im dying because im depressed and i dont do anything all week.

i feel guilty for being autistic and unemployed while my partner is the one of us that has a job next to studying.

she grew up in a single family home and i grew up somewhat poor and she has this higher living standart she requires. her spending money on luxury items (nonessential clothes, watches) makes me feel like i have to make up by spending extra less.

i rot at home every day. i do nothing but scroll on the internet all day. im too adhd/depressed to do anything thats more active. being alive feels so pointless. i get up i scroll i eat i scroll i wait for her to come home i scroll she comes home she wants to watch a series i scroll i want to die i feel hopless about the future

she reassures me it will be much better once im on adhd medication. how many more days of rotting at home? how many more days of scrolling on the internet?

i feel like i might as well be a ghost. i dont leave the house much. i dont feel noticed by anyone. i dont want to be noticed when i leave the house. this life feels like a rotting untreated tooth.

the only reason to stay alive is the carrot dangling in front of my nose that doesnt get any closer (the carrot is having a dog one day. i said "2023 ill get a dog", then it was "2024 ill get a dog". now it is "2025 ill get a dog". i dont think thats going to happen.)

life in this city is actively hostile towards me. when i used to live in the coutryside i took hour long walks when i felt like i feel right now. the park is not a suitable replacement for the fields and the forest.

wish i wasnt born a human. i dont think forest animals suffer from capitalism induced depression.

i wish i wasnt sharing my space with my partner. i dont have my own room, my own corner, my own furniture. i feel embarassed about the amount of stuffed animals i have. i feel self concious about being myself (dont enjoy my clothes, dont enjoy how i look, dont enjoy certain features of my body, dont enjoy my aloofness towards new people, dont enjoy that her mother thinks im too autistic).

when i was living at a friends place for a week when catsitting, i felt much better mentally (minus the urinating cats). now i feel like the walls are coming down on my head.

i could literally take the train anywhere in this coutry but im sitting on the sofa. i could go to the sea. i could go to the heathland. i could go to the countryside. i could go to the marsh. i am sitting on the sofa. playing stupid repetitive browser games. i dont want this life. i need to get up. from the fucking sofa. not even to go to a different country. just to make myself dinner in the kitchen. my stomach grumbles. i dont have the energy to cook.

[dennisboobs]

honestly this is just my opinion but the portrayal of dennis as some stone cold manipulative mastermind is one of my beefs with later seasons of this show. i feel like in general iasip has been leaning way too much towards these one dimensional portrayals of the gang and to me it just gets…boring? overdone? i feel like the majority of the Character Jokes involve dennis being implied to be some manipulative sex predator and mac and charlie to be naive and stupid. ive been rewatching the earlier seasons and they just feel so much more like the characters have room to breathe.

to be clear i dont think that dennis is a serial killer mastermind. and im not trying to be unnecessarily negative, i think later seasons of sunny have their own strong suits in characterization and whatnot, but i do wish they would tone down certain jokes and tropes bc it starts to get repetitive (like early seasons mac was so much more of a genuine asshole and less of a naive idiot, early seasons dennis got to be an embarrassing flop more often, i just miss that range and i miss when dennis wasnt always the “straight” man in a scene). but again this is just my opinion u might disagree lol

oh i completely agree. my biggest problem with characterization as the series progresses is that as the show gets bigger, the characters get more cartoonish with a list of established tropes to adhere to (which makes it more predictable), instead of the gang being more..... malleable. like real people. i think focusing on smaller, more personally motivated stories definitely helps. because in early sunny the gang almost always causes the problems they end up having to deal with, and as the show progresses it becomes more about what wacky situation everyone will find themselves in next.

and yes, i love bossy asshole mac, i love straight man charlie, and i love goofy incompetent idiot dennis who thinks he's All That but ends up making a fool of himself. <3 i just miss when the gang felt like an actual group of friends who had completely pointless arguments about nothing but at the end of the day you could tell they still hung out together for a reason. i think rcg rewatching eps has helped with this, but there is something i just fucking love about the earliest seasons (pre-5) of sunny that was sort of lost.

[matoitech]

i wish kaiju no 8 was better than it was i love the concept of it but ive never been able to get further than liek idk .. 15 chapters or so. maybe i havent given it a fair chance i mean it took me multiple tries over the years to break into dungeon meshi bcuz i jsut wasnt interested in the early chapters but i have this kind of opposite problem w kaiju no 8 where id rather watch kafka work minimum wage than wherever it feels like itll go. it just doesnt rly successfully keep my interest. i feel like the baseline story concept is more interesting than whats actually done w it cuz it feels like itll just become repetitive fight scene to military scene and back again. i have Not read the entire thing i really cannot attest to this its just the vibe i get i guess. im not really sure like. what happens in it besides the beginning? everyone knows the beginning and no one seems to know or remember what happens after that

[starnightlover]

Hey star, its your “🦋” anon!

This is probably stupid but i genuinely don’t know what to do. I really want to start applying the law and manifesting the things i desire, and i know how but i just cant stop procrastinating. I think part of it is the fear of wasting my time, like i have this pit of fear that it isn’t real ( which i know its silly cause it all makes sense but my brain just is so annoying lol ) and that makes me put off applying so to not disappoint myself i think. idk if that made sense but i seriously am stuck. im so sorry if this is an annoying repetitive ask

This isn't repetitive don't worry Iove! I've been in your shoes, it can feel scary and feel like you aren't in control, I understand! The reason you're going through is deferred occupancy! This means you're not applying the law right now! You're not occupying the wishfullfiled! You're waiting for the “perfect” time to start applying when you should be occupying now! You need to accept that you have your desire already! You are coming from a place of assuming your desires are desperate from you and not something you already have. You arent manifesting something, because you already manifested it! You see creation is finished, you thought of your desires thus it exists within your imagination, and imagination is the only true reality! Break the chains of the illusion of fear! That fear isn't real! It has no control over you! You are the god of your reality not even your own fear has control over you unless you give it power! Stop viewing your desires as something that isn't yours already, you need to occupy the wish fulfilled! Kick those doubts and fears to the curb and just breathe, I want you to just fulfill your desire within your imagination just for five minutes and see how you feel! Once you start doing this, allow yourself to do that everyday! Allow yourself to manifest, allow yourself to enter the state of already having what you want! I promise you the law is the most real thing ever, think about the thousands of success stories that are on Tumblr, Reddit, YouTube, tiktok, etc! Us bloggers wouldn't be here if the law wasnt real, we wouldn't waste our time on it! Remember who you are! You are the operant power, the ultimate creator of your reality! Nothing can stop you! Stop waiting, stop wishing, stop hoping, stop procrastinating, APPLY WHAT YOU KNOW! Your failure to accept that your desire is already yours is the only thing delaying your manifestation from appearing in the 3d, creation is finished! Your desire is yours, just allow yourself to accept this fact!

[wc-confessions]

Hey there, moderator. I'm wondering if it's fine to ask you questions about your own warriors opinions? Such as:

favorite or least favorite character, ship, book, or arc

any unpopular opinions? something you like that most people dislike, or something you dislike that most people like

what your ideal warriors rewrite looks like

any ocs you would like to share

other people are always sending in their opinions so i'm curious about your own opinions. I apologize if you have answered some of these questions already and I didn't see

oooh thank you for sending these! i’ve actually answered most of them before in the past but as i’ve said my opinions change a lot, esp regarding favourites, so i’m always going to answer differently lol

my favourite character is tigerclaw. i don’t care what anyone says, early warriors he was a good, complex villain and every other villain after wishes they were as good as him. he had a lot of potential and i really hate how in tpb there were a lot of throw away concepts, particularly regarding his character. least favourite off the top of my head is hmm jayfeather. interesting character but his awful personality and the fact that in the end he doesn’t actually do anything major made me lose interest in him. i love him in fanon tho.

worst ship: nightheart/sunbeam makes me vomit atm. i’m a big shadowsight/sunbeam fan rn they are so gay. tnp was a pretty boring arc but had interesting ideas, and i think pot wasnt very good at all but i think the characters had potential.

unpopular opinions (?)...the prophecies begins had its issues but imo will always be the most well written story from the erins. while i don’t like the way they are written sometimes purely for annoying repetitive conflict, i do like tigerheart and onestar as characters and leaders. breezepelt and nightcloud are good characters and i love crowfeather’s complex relationship with them. silverstream didnt do shit shes literally another average love interest idk why theres intense hatred for her.

i was actually writing a rewrite for tpb but eventually it just became an original work that i really enjoy working on. but my ideal warriors, unrelated to my work, is sort of like: there’s no code so the cats being ‘wild and free’ makes more sense, the clowders are one and there are no borders. conflict mostly comes from scrapping for food, family drama, drama between families, and murder. the clowders see other cats as equals, and are mostly indifferent on kittypets but are interested in their relationship with humans as they are rarely seen in the woods. annd i think less evil dictators as antagonists.

i actually do not have any warriors ocs </3 but i will share my ocs from my story soon once i get some stuff worked out. idk if it will be on here tho or on my main

[menalez]

I'm not suggesting there's a winner or an outcome. I'm simply outlining that it's normal for a community to keep discussing things that we disagree on. You might not see the reason why a topic gets brought up because you personally don't care, but others do and have good reason to. Maybe Be the Change and encourage new topics to talk about. But if we agree on whatever you bring up don't expect it to take up as much time as the more controversial topics. It's the same in politics. Politicians debate hot topics, and it's repetitive and annoying. Families go through particular issues and will ruminate on them because it's on people's minds, it's a source of conflict. Motherhood, het relationships and separatism will always be a source of controversy under radical feminism and the topics will never go away. New women come to the movement every day and want to discuss it after seeing an old post. They all revolve around the same issue: Is expecting radical feminists to be radical IRL, when they can be, a problem? How far can the movement go when we enable helplessness and doomer thinking? How seriously can radical feminism be taken when we have women walking around claiming to be one while doing absolutely everything patriarchy expects? In the second wave, women divorced their husbands and kicked habits/routines conditioned by patriarchy. Coincidentally, that's also when radical feminism made a change in the world. We can't even say it's feminist to centre women in your life and avoid relationships with men on radblr or else it's "misogynistic." Come on. Questioning or critiquing gender conformity isn't allowed because it's "misogynistic." It's laughable to not expect "radical" women to do radical things. The movement is being weighed down by inaction encouraged by those refusing to change a thing in their lives.

okay perhaps i wasnt clear so allow me to emphasise. i agree that people can & should talk thru disagreements and differing ideas. but i think the way radblr goes about it makes “overkill” an understatement. at a certain point we just have to accept that everyone has their mind made up and simply move on instead of pushing a debate in which every possible thing to say has already been said. the horse is not only dead, it’s beyond decomposed. like i do agree with u, many ppl do not live by their morals on here and many claim to be radfems but clearly simply by virtue of their lifestyle, they are not. instead of us just stating that n leaving it at that tho, people go through these meaningless tiresome back & forths where they keep talking at each other. at a certain point, all that can be said & needs to be said has been said and we need to simply move on. otherwise we are literally wasting everyone’s time & efforts going in circles when we literally have so many things to discuss! on one hand i get the frustration that a woman who does absolutely nothing radical is calling herself a radfem, on the other i also get feeling disillusioned by that being treated like the world’s worst crime that warrants comments like “lol don’t run to us if he ends up beating u!!” (which unfortunately i’ve seen several ppl make here). it doesn’t encourage women to take radical action and simply ends up making the women Not doing so feel attacked and hate the movement, so like. again who is it even helping?? the approach is simply wrong & at a certain point ppl need to just. agree to disagree. like, if someone makes the 900th “lmao a radfem wouldn’t fuck men so take that word out of ur mouth” it won’t suddenly change anything, if a woman whines about how separatism is heterophobic it won’t change anything either. all it does is cause infighting and people to be defensive and i wish people would simply move on & be normal about it. and perhaps have a new discussion that we don’t have 8 times per year

[user2315]

i wish i could understand why everything happens and why i do what i do and why i am the way i am. i keep longing for something, like evenings alone at my dad’s. and talking to someone sweet and odd. that doesnt exist thought, its all fantasy now. what do i really want? college doesnt seem that interesting and it wont actually matter but thats what they dont know. they dont know i have always wanted to die and thats why i dont want to do anything else. its why i have no purpose or reason to live. i cant believe these people are so delusional to think it even matters what they do. just buy a gun and kill yourself. i wish there was a way for me to do that. but for now its only hanging, i can never full drop down though. im a coward. i guess this is all ive been thinking of lately. if i died theyd say the world failed me but really id be the only one that failed myself. even though it hurts i dont blame people for not caring about me and pretending im invisible. it makes it easier to realize it really doesnt matter what i do. i feel like im going on a really stupid repetitive rant again. i wish i could let myself cry but it feels so pathetic and its not worth the headache. i wish someone loved me. i wish i wasnt here. i wish i was in my own world. i wish i wasnt ugly. but i mostly wish i was dead so i wouldnt worry about those other wishes being granted.

[p-t-f-s]

everytime i make a new friend or i open up about shit it /always/ ends up at one point or another they say my life is like a tv show or i should write a book or pitch my life - like more a handful amount of times, like damn near every time i make a friend. and like. i wish they were wrong when i try to look objectively at what im telling them and not just. my life that i wake up and live and go to sleep with every day. but also like. thats also a looooooooooot of people ive met??? everyone has interesting and fun stories, but most of life is so similarly repetitive that we forget it more than we experience. also i do believe it is my autistic rizz. and ability to self sooth and parent.

[its all just personal life bitching/discussion/musings below]

anyways i wish life would be calm for like. a couple months pls. i know a year is too much to ask but literally this year has been a lot. like last year was a lot but it wasnt a fucking competition. getting my car stolen again, then losing my job in what was supposed to be my 5 year anniversary, and then finding out my uncle had stage 4 cancer. then it was spring break and i got to visit my cousing with a thankfully preplanned and prepayed vacation during the midst and height and she and her husband were like "heres our cocktail maker. get as drunk as you want" which was nice of them so i stayed tipsy half the time i was awake instead of high while in seattle. went to a wine tasting expo. got throw up drunk. my cousin was very impressed by my ability to keep my manners while drunk past my tits and wait to throw up till after id rolled the window down and stuck my head out. i was getting blackout drunk bc id apparently texted my friends i loved them which i had no recollection of doing considering my phone was actively dying while i was still only actually tipsy at that expo. i was also less stress then bc my car had been found. totalled, crashed and smashed in the front which thankfully i owed less than it was worth so they payout covered the downpayment for my new car. rip to not getting my personalized horse license plate with my name on it. then i get back home and my uncle is now dead and the whole family is in town for the funeral. its been a cascade of em for a few years now since my mom started the party back in 21.

by the viewing id started a new job for a week. close by home and only a dollar less than previously. they were asking a whole lot for shit pay in truth. and NOW. I FIND OUT THE JOB I STARTED WHILE TAKING A FRAUD ACCOUNTING CLASS. MIGHT BE VICTIM TO FRAUD. POSSIBLY SINCE INCEPTION AND IN THE MOST TERRIBLY HORRIBLY OBVIOUS WAY THAT JUST KEPT SLOWLY AND SLOWLY GETTING PEELED AND REVEALED. I love it when the head of one department tells me hes in cahoots with the head of another dpt and a few workers from their and others about the terrible company shit they found and are kinda looking at other jobs. ofc he did say that after i said to his face that i was spending a bit every morning applying to other jobs after learning of the possible fraud VIA OUR """CONSULTING CFO""" having been previously convicted of fraud. twice. over a decade between convictions. were getting drinks later this week for him to tell me everything else hes found and lurked about in the system. and how no one understands what accounting is or does or how i actually spend half or most of my day playing solitaire or watching anime. bc they want me to be a controller but are calling and paying me at the clerk level. so thats what they get. i love the phrase act your wage.

theres still so many other things that have happened this year too that i still havent mentioned. like the moon hole. passive aggressive fighting with my upstairs neighbor who said i was "delusional and fucking hallucinating" bc i said he stomps in the middle of the night. and literally as i typed that there he went above my head at. ah. 10:58 pm. since my second talking to him in march i know ive not been the only one to talk to him about his shaking the goddamn foundations of the building or waking the toddler constantly in the apartment next to his, diagonal from mine. the surprise birthday party my friends threw for me after literally freightening me when i came home with surprise and each giving me different hearfelt and attentive gifts of all my different interests. weekly dinners with my dad on the same days he was court ordered to have my older siblings and i during the week as he lives 10 minutes away taking care of our grandfather. hes the only reason i get updates on my older sisters life as she blocked me on all social media and cut me from her life before our mothers death for our differing political beliefs. infighting truly is the death of leftists as out beliefs were always closer together than to that of our very republican parents. but im also not an american government shoe loving authority cuck like most the rest of em. "you know what its like to be a minority bc you were a literal minority of being white kids going to a majority black school in the city." to my fucking FACE. not only is that incredibly dismissive on so many levels but like with how LEGITIMATELY my siblings took and NOODED THEIR HEADS?????? TO IT. truly fiction is a joke compared to life.

anyways this is the most any of you will ever get from me here on tumblr in months, good luck to any of my followers seeing this who were unaware i am a person and wassup to my mutuals entirely unaware of my life and smooches to my dear dear friends who are all very aware of all of this. everyone else. idgaf, this was for me to vent and proclaim. bc i lay down in my bed with my cat looking very disappointed that im not asleep despite how late it is and i have to go to sleep keeping all of that with me for the rest of my life. oh it may not stay close, it may not be completely there by the end, but i know i will always be aware even more so than before when i was living out of my car, of what i keep in and am willing to leave in and with it. I have somehow kept that cute little cactus my friend gave my for my birthday alive still, i now have a whole wall of plants that ive kept alive for over a year, and i plant to keep that as long as I can. I have presents and gifts and memories that i plan to look fondly on tomorrow and the day after and the day after that and so on. afterall. I need to check on my plants and water them, and feed my cat. everyday a tragedy happens and still i must feed my cat. my mother was dying, and still i had to feed my cat. was she suffering? no, she was not even there anymore to be suffering and still i must go home and feed my cat and sleep and wake up and there is my cat to welcome my mornings after guarding my nights, a clear agreement that she must be fed once pleased with her pettings. my elder sister blocked me and cut me from her life before our mothers death and even during she did not change, strong in her stance and belief not even grief would change or ease her foundations. nor would my grief stop my cat from being fed. every day i wake and sleep with all these things and one day my cat will die. and i will grieve. and it will not be her that gets me through it, but she will never be parted from me again. i will wake up and make the same sleepy motions that indicate her morning ritual that will not be performed. my day will be as different and as same as it was before. i will sleep and i will wake with it all and i will meet someone new and tell them the first time i really got into energy drinks was after getting a whole case for being a smartass at 7am to emergency driving instructors. that i only started drinking coffee bc a boy who liked me worked at starbucks and so gave me a large giftcard and an in to getting my first job at starbucks. you never know why or how somethings started.